December 2022 - Issue 293

Letter From The Editors

I attempt to do, I first think about how my Dad would have done it. I thought about how the Ole Man could really lay down a thoughtful message and realized there was no way I could match his words for the Christmas season. I looked back a few years and pulled out these thoughts from December Letter From The Editor articles that he wrote…. I read them in his voice and they still ring true. However you read them, take your time to ponder the real message of the Christmas season.

- Lincoln

During the last month of the year, the spirit of giving and benevolence is evident in the motorcycle community by the number of toy runs that are held. And I am proud of all the good that all of us do. I really am proud to be a biker. And not just at Christmas time either. I think that is true in most cases, too. The generosity of bikers is known far and wide throughout the year. At Christmas bikers decorate their motorcycles and don Santa hats and suits to spread the joy. But there is more to it than toy runs, parades, and Santa Claus and presents. It is the Christian celebration of the birth of Jesus that brings a joy to mankind that supersedes all worldly pleasure.

It is a high holy day for Christians, and on Christmas morning it is our tradition to read “the Christmas Story” aloud from the Bible before we open the first gift. We take turns each year. Luke Chapter 2 tells us that Joseph and Mary were returning to Bethlehem to be taxed Mary gave birth to Jesus in a stable because there was no room for them at the Inn. An angel announced to some shepherds “…I bring you good news of great joy that will be for all the people. Today …. a Savior has been born to you; he is the Messiah, the Lord.”

THIS IS THE REASON I CELEBRATE CHRISTMAS! The presents that we share at Christmas are symbolic of the love of God and His Gift to us: Jesus Christ. Being an American, a Christian, and a biker, I accept others as they are and Jesus does, too. This Christmas, I hope that you realize that God loves you and accept His Gift. Merry Christmas!

Wise Men Still Seek Him!

Writers

Fort Bragg Harley-Davidson Is Gearing Up For 2023!

oing into 2022, Fort Bragg harLey-davidson was still navigating inventory shortages and other challenges, but that didn’t stop them from continuing to bring top notch customer service and events to benefit their amazing commu nity.

Harley-David son has always been about bring ing people together and used the com munity of riders to help connect people with family, friends and other riders. That has always been the shared philosophy of Fort Bragg Harley-Davidson. The events held at Fort Bragg HarleyDavidson and around town always have one goal-to help those who need it most.

“If we have learned anything from the past year, it’s that the community will always come together. When one of our own needs us, we will always find a way to help.” said Cheryl Adams. They celebrated 8 years and have shown they are a staple here in Fayetteville.

They have hosted com munity events like blood drives, toy runs, memo rial rides and more. The 3rd Annual Ice Bash and Pig PIckin’ For Autism was a huge success .

The 6th Annual Tata’s & Tailpipes raised money for Cape Fear Valley Friends Of The Cancer Center for breast cancer research. Harley-Ween al lowed kids to show off their costumes and safely trick or treat. They even gave away 2 new Iron 883s!

“This is what it’s all about! Being able to give back to the community that has always supported us” says Jennifer Pierce,

Events & Marketing Manager for Fort Bragg Harley-David son. “We have been able to put on events every weekend to bring us all together . “

This month, Santa is visiting Fort Bragg Harley-Davidson again! Pierce added “To help our children in need, on Sat urday, December 3rd, we are having a toy drive and photo opportunity with Santa.” You can stay updated on all of their December events by following them on Facebook or on their website.

Fort Bragg Harley-Davidson offers their Riding Academy to new riders who want to feel that freedom and excitement of the open road. “This is the perfect gift!” says Adams.

Fort Bragg Harley-Davidson is a full line Harley-Davidson dealership, offering new and pre owned motorcycles, parts and accessories, general merchandise and apparel, service and Rid ing Academy. They are located at 3950 Sycamore Dairy Road in Fayetteville, NC. Visit them in person, or on line at www. FortBraggHarley.com.

DEC 2 FORGOTTEN SONS MC

OPEN HOUSE 110 Griffith Plaza Dr., Winston-Salem, NC. 7pm-?, cold bev erages avail, games, join the party.

DEC 3 BIKER TRASH NATION TOY RUN Pine Tree Tavern, 3880 Betha nia Station Rd., Winston-Salem, NC. Reg 11am, KSU 12pm, $20/single, $25/double. Proceeds used to buy bikes & toys for kids in need.

DEC 3 CAMEL CITY CREWSERS

TOY SHOW King’s Hot Dogs, 1009 Bethania-Rural Hall Rd., rural Hall, NC. Reg 10am, judging 1pm, awards 3pm. $20/entry or new unwrapped toy. Contests, awards, benefits the Salvation Army. In conjunction with Biker Trash Nation Toy Run.

DEC 3 16TH ANNUAL BARRY OLE DOG GLENN MEMORIAL TOY RUN

Double D Burnout Saloon, 1408 E. Mountain St., Kernersville, NC. Reg 10:30am, KSU 11:30am, $15/single, $20/double or unwrapped toy. Raffles, 50/50, auction, food, music, prizes. Benefits Toys for Tots.

DEC 3 GUILFORD COUNTY SHERIFF’S OFFICE TOY RUN Fire Station #9, 7400 Summerfield Rd., Sum merfield, NC. 10am, bring a new unwrapped toy/minimum $20. Free shirt with reg.

DEC 3 DOWN HOME HARLEY-DAVIDSON TOY RUN 2215 W. Hanford Rd., Burlington, NC. Reg 11am, KSU 1pm, bring a new unwrapped toy. Pictures with Santa 11am-1pm, lunch served 11:30am-1pm. Benefits Christ mas Cheer of Alamance Co. www. downhomeharley.com, 336-227-1261

DEC 3 32ND ANNUAL CONOVER SCHOOL TOY RUN Wizard Saloon, 651 21st St NE, Hickory, NC. Reg 10am, parade leaves 12:25pm, rain or shine, shirts available. Make dona tions payable to Conover School. 828-327-8555

DEC 3 MCDOWELL COUNTY GHOST RIDERS TOY RUN FOR KIDS Boondocks, 4231 Hwy 221, Marion, NC. Reg 10am, KSU 12pm, $10/bike, $15/couple. Proceeds stay in McDowell County. Holiday, 828317-7993, Q Ball, 828-785-8436, Smurf, 828-284-6365

DEC 3 TOBACCO ROAD H-D HOLIDAY JOY RIDE 1126 S. Saunders St., Raleigh, NC. Reg 10am, KSU 11:30am, bring a new unwrapped toy or cash donation. Wreath laying, food, music & more. Benefits Toys for Tots & Toys For Lil’ Troops. 919-832-2261

DEC 3 BATCHELOR’S TAVERN 29TH ANNUAL TOY RUN 9245 Webb’s Mill Rd., Spring Hope, NC. KSU 1pm, bring a new unwrapped toy or cash donation. Food, fun, raffle, 50/50. Pro ceeds go to Tar River Baptist Assoc. Josh, 252-908-6086

DEC 3 FORT BRAGG HARLEYDAVIDSON PICTURES WITH SANTA 3950 Sycamore Dairy Rd., Fayetteville, NC. 11am-2pm, bring an unwrapped toy or monetary donation and get your picture taken with Santa. www.fortbraggharley.com, 910-8641200

DEC 3 HARLEYDAY TOY RIDE

Bulldog Harley-Davidson, 1043 Outlet Center Dr., Smithfield, NC. Reg 10am, KSU 11:45am, $20 donation or toy. Shotgun raffle, free BBQ for riders after ride. www.bulldogharleydavid son.com, 919-938-1592

DEC 3 27TH ANNUAL GASTON COUNTY TOY RUN FOR KIDS

Ranlo Church of God, 1825 Spencer Mountain Rd., Gastonia, NC. Rain or shine, KSU 11:30am, bring a new unwrapped toy, police escorted, food provided. Harley-Davidson bike raffle. Proceeds go to the Children of Gas ton Co. Foot, 704-913-3392, Tony, 704-975-7924

DEC 3 22ND ANNUAL ACE BASIN ABATE CHRISTMAS TOY RUN Elks Lodge, 236 Milestone Ln, Walterboro, SC. Reg 9am, KSU 10:30am, $20/ rider, $10/passenger incl meal. Food, raffles, games, silent auction. Benefits Colleton County Children. Sandy, 843-568-8915, Joan, 843-729-6540

DEC 4 LUCKY’S SALOON CHILI COOK OFF 1453 Industry Dr., Bur lington, NC. 1pm, free to enter, $5/ tasting incl voting ticket. Proceeds go towards local children’s Christmas. 336-570-1050

DEC 4 36TH ANNUAL RANDOLPH COUNTY CBA TOY RUN Randolph Mall parking lot, 345 E. Dixie Dr., Asheboro, NC. Reg 10am, KSU 1:30pm, bring an unwrapped gift for teenage boy or girl or monetary dona tion. Shirts avail, chance to win cash. Gena, 336-963-3438

DEC 4 CHARLOTTE CBA TOYS

FOR TOTS RUN Bojangles Coliseum parking lot, 2700 E. Independence Blvd., Charlotte, NC. Reg 11am, KSU 1pm, Rick Nail, 704-577-1546, info@ charlottecba.org

DEC 4 37TH ANNUAL ABATE

CHRISTMAS TOY RUN Greenville

Shrine Club, 119 Beverly Rd., Green ville, SC. Line up 12pm, KSU 2pm, police escort, snow date: 12/11. Bring an unwrapped toy or gift card for kids of all ages. Benefits Julie Valentine Center. Bubbles, 864-329-5897

DEC 10 3rd ANNUAL BUB’S RIDE

STE Powersports, 1426 Northside Dr., Statesville, NC. Toy Run from STE to Blue Collar, KSU 12:10pm, live band, food, adult beverages. Benefits the children of Iredell & Rowan co. 980621-7399

DEC

10 WILLIE’S HONKY TONK

CHILI COOK-OFF 4310 Old Rural Hall Rd., Winston-Salem, NC. Judg ing @2pm, free chili after 2pm.

DEC 10 LUCKY’S SALOON

CHRISTMAS PARTY 1453 Indus try Dr., Burlington, NC. Bring a new unwrapped toy, food, live music. 336570-1050

DEC 10 THUMPER’S HOLIDAY

CHARITY RUN Independence Har ley-Davidson, 9205 E. Independence Blvd., Matthews, NC. Gather 12pm, KSU 1pm, bring unwrapped gifts for boys & girls 12yrs old, teens & a gift for their mom. Benefits Turning Point, www.turningpointnc.org Shine, 704840-9710 or Dano, 704-254-7355

DEC

10 ELVES ON THE RUN RIDE

Living Faith Fellowship Church, 1090 W. Mount Dr., Rocky Mount, NC. Reg 9am, KSU 11am, $20/bike or car, $5/ rider incl meal, rain or shine. Lindsey & her boys were in a car accident on Oct. 13th. 50/50, cake auction, door prizes. Proceeds go to Lindsey & boys Christmas. Hosted by Compas sion Ministries.

DEC 10 30TH ANNIVERSARY

BRUNSWICK COUNTY TOY RUN

Brunswick Island Baptist Church, 1672 Mt Pisgah Rd SW, Supply, NC. Reg 9:30am, police escort, $35/fee incl food, poker hand & shirt. 50/50, best poker hand, shirts, auction, food, golf cart raffle. 910-754-5144

DEC 10 FORT BRAGG HARLEY-DAVIDSON UGLY SWEATER DAY 3950 sycamore Dairy Rd., Fayetteville, NC. Show off your ugly sweater & be entered to win a gift. www.fortbrag gharley.com, 910-864-1200

DEC 11 42ND ANNUAL STITCH’S BEAUFORT MOTORCYCLE TOY RUN Beaufort Town Center, 2015 Boundary St., Beaufort, SC. 1pm, bring a new unwrapped toy of at least $10 in value. Oyster roast, donations go to Salvation Army for Beaufort area. Gonzo, 843-575-1060, inzane assilem@gmail.com

DEC 14 FORT BRAGG HARLEYDAVIDSON VIP SHOPPING NIGHT 3950 Sycamore Dairy Rd., Fayette ville, NC. 6-8pm, light refreshments & cocktails. www.fortbraggharley.com, 910-864-1200

DEC 17 WILLIE’S HONKY TONK DIRTY SANTA 4310 Old Rural Hall Rd., Winston-Salem, NC. 7pm, must sign up to participate.

DEC 17 COX’S HARLEY-DAVIDSON CHRISTMAS LUAU 2795 NC-134, Asheboro, NC. 10am-5pm, wear your best Hawaiian look for a chance to win a $50 Cox’s H-D gift card, drink while you shop, free pina coladas while they last. www.coxharley-david son.com, 336-629-2415

DEC 17 DOWN HOME HARLEYDAVIDSON NAUGHTY OR NICE WITH SANTA & THE GRINCH 2215 Hanford Rd., Burlington, NC. Free gift wrapping 11am-3pm. Photos avail able 12-3pm, cookies & treats, www. downhomeharley.com, 336-227-1261

DEC 17 WINDJAMMERS M/C 34TH ANNUAL TOY RUN RIDE Cleveland Mall, 2001-53 E. Dixon Blvd., Shelby, NC. 1pm/line up, free breakfast at clubhouse, free BBQ after ride while supplies last, live entertainment. Benefits the Children of Cleveland County. Curly, 980-925-1635, Slick, 704-600-7064, Dawg, 704-751-6431

DEC 17 FORT BRAGG HARLEY-DAVIDSON FREE BREAKFAST WITH SANTA 3950 Sycamore Dairy Rd., Fayetteville, NC. 10am-12pm, www. fortbraggharley.com, 910-864-1200

DEC 23 XTREME WINGS N THINGS CHRISTMAS PARTY & BRANDEE’S BIRTHDAY 3441 Myer Lee Dr., Winston-Salem, NC. Live music, 336293-4983

DEC 24 FORT BRAGG HARLEY-DAVIDSON CHRISTMAS EVE PARTY 3950 Sycamore Dairy Rd., Fayette ville, NC. 11am-3pm, cocktails, cocoa & cookies. www.fortbraggharley.com, 910-864-1200

DEC 31 SPRINGERS NEW YEAR’S EVE PARTY 405 Rocky Knoll Rd., Greensboro, NC. Live music

DEC 31 WILLIE’S HONKY TONK NYE PARTY 4310 Old Rural Hall Rd., Winston-Salem, NC. 8pm

DEC 31 PINE TREE TAVERN NOON YEARS EVE PARTY 3880 Bethania Station Rd., Winston-Salem, NC. For those who can’t stay up until midnight. 336-815-1220

DEC 31 PINE TREE TAVERN NEW YEARS EVE KARAOKE PARTY 3880 Bethania Station Rd., WinstonSalem, NC. 5pm-?, 336-815-1220

DEC 31 FORT BRAGG HARLEY-DAVIDSON NEW YEAR’S EVE PARTY 3950 Sycamore Dairy Rd., Fayette ville, NC. 11am-3pm, Beer, cocktails & raffles. www.fortbraggharley.com, 910-864-1200

DEC 31 POLAR BEAR POKER RUN

Fort Bragg Harley-Davidson, 3950 Sycamore Dairy Rd., Fayetteville, NC. Reg 11am, $20/rider, $10/passenger, $10 add hands, prizes for best & worst hand. Hosted by Nam Knights of America MC Old North Chp. www. fortbraggharley.com, 910-864-1200

JAN 6 FORGOTTEN SONS MC

OPEN HOUSE 110 Griffith Plaza Dr., Winston-Salem, NC. 7pm-?, cold bev erages avail, games, join the party.

JAN 7 JOE SMITH DAY Pine Tree Tavern, 3880 Bethania Station Rd., Winston-Salem, NC. 1pm, celebrating Joe Smith, live music. 336-815-1220

JAN 7 5TH ANNUAL GASTON COUNTY CBA MICKEY SEIGLER MEMORIAL POLAR BEAR RUN

The Country Kitchen, 116 E Main St., Dallas, NC. First bike out 11am, dice hands for CBA members, $15/1 hand 1 meal ticket, $25/ 3 hands & 2 meal tickets. Dice hands for non-members, $20/1 hand & 1 meal ticket, $20/3 hands & 2 meal tickets, incl 1 year membership with CBA/ABATE. Best & worst hand, benefits the Gaston CBA’s charitable & legislative work in NC & Gaston Co.

JAN 28 4TH ANNUAL ICE BASH Fort Bragg Harley-Davidson, 3950 Syca more Dairy Rd., Fayetteville, NC. Reg 10am, Show 12pm, $30/entry fee. Sound off, www.fortgraggharley.com, Lee Maynor, 910-536-5319

MAR 11 GASTON CO. TOY RUN FOR KIDS BREAKFAST Gastonia Dodge/Jeep/Ram, 2339 Franklin Blvd., Gastonia, NC. 8am while sup plies last, $6 donation, raffle bike tickets available. Benefits The Gaston Co. Toy Run for Kids. Foot, 704-9133392, Tony, 704-975-7924

MAR 25 7TH HEARTIVERSARY FOR BRANDON Blue Collar Cycle Company, 1017 Old W. Innes St., Salisbury, NC. Blood drive & organ donor sign up. www.bluecollarcycle.com, 980621-7399

APR 22 2ND ANNUAL CHILI COOK OFF Blue Collar Cycle Company, 1017 Old W. Innes St., Salisbury, NC. www.bluecollarcycle. com, 980-621-7399

APR 22 11TH ANNUAL KIDS PATH BIKE & CAR SHOW Cadillac Ranch, 6330 David Moore Rd., Burlington, NC. Rain date: 04/23. $20/to show, $10/en try, cash prizes, food, 50/50, music. Bird Dog, 336-260-1685

prizes. Benefits Spina Bifida research. 704-933-3266.

JUN 10 GASTON CO. TOY RUN

FOR KIDS BREAKFAST Gastonia Dodge/Jeep/Ram, 2339 Franklin Blvd., Gastonia, NC. 8am while sup plies last, $6 donation, raffle bike tickets available. Benefits The Gaston Co. Toy Run for Kids. Foot, 704-9133392, Tony, 704-975-7924

JUL 15 GASTON CO. TOY RUN

FOR KIDS HOT DOG LUNCH Gas tonia Dodge/Jeep/Ram, 2339 Frank lin Blvd., Gastonia, NC. 11am while supplies last, $6 donation, raffle bike tickets available. Benefits The Gaston Co. Toy run for Kids. Foot, 704-9133392, Tony, 704-975-7924

JAN 14 FULL THROTTLE MAGAZINE CUSTOM BIKE

SHOW Greens boro Coliseum 1921 W. Gate City Blvd. 10-8pm, bike show, live music, vendors, product demos and more! Call to enter your bike or get a vendor spot. $20/person, kids 10 & Under Free. Tickets on sale now on ticket master and www.fullthrottlemagazine. com/shop 336-885-5400

MAY 6 SOUTH

MAIN CUSTOMS PLAY

DAY PAY DAY South Main Customs, 1220 S Main St., Kannapolis, NC. First bike out 11am, last bike out 12pm. $20/per hand, $2000 in cash prizes. DJ, door

VAMP – Veterans Adaptive Motorcycle Program

Our mission is to restore the freedom of two wheels on the open road to as many veterans as possible.

he Freedom oF the open road is an american tradition. Taking your favorite set of wheels out on the highway for a road trip is part of our country’s DNA. For those individuals who prefer that experi ence with one headlight and two wheels, experiencing the “wind therapy” of being on a motorcycle is incomparable to just about anything else on earth. Those who love it will tell you that losing the ability to ride is like losing part of your soul. Countless wounded veterans have returned from combat with physical injuries and impairments that have stolen their freedom to ride.

The Veterans Adaptive Motorcycle Program (VAMP) is a veteran-owned and operated charity with a mission to restore the freedom of two wheels on the open road to as many veter ans as possible. We accomplish this by facilitating mechani cal modifications to motorcycles according to each wounded veteran rider’s unique needs. This mission springs from an understanding that hitting the open road on a motorcycle can be one of the most healing and therapeutic experiences we can offer to those who live with the scars of war and the memo ries of tragedies and horrors that are unimaginable to most Americans.

was immediately deployed to Forward Operating Base (FOB) Blackhawk in Afghanistan for his first tour with 8/1 Stryker Cavalry Squadron. They regularly patrolled the villages and areas around the town of Spin Boldak near the Afghanistan/ Pakistan border. On October 13, 2009, Grady was driving a Stryker combat vehicle that struck an improvised explosive device (IED) and he was severely injured, especially on his right leg. Grady was medically evacuated from Afghanistan and doctors were initially able to save his leg, but complica tions increased in the years following his injury and ultimately his leg was amputated in 2015.

VAMP helps wounded veterans like Grady Bendel. Grady joined the Army in January of 2009 as a Cavalry Scout and

Grady always loved motorcycles and he saved up to pur chase his first when he joined the Army. After he was injured, he was unable to ride, and his bike was stored in his garage until 2022 when Jack Stottlemire and VAMP reached out to Grady. VAMP worked with a local motorcycle shop near Grady’s home in Greensboro, NC to install the necessary parts for Grady to be able to ride with his prosthetic leg and get Grady’s bike back on the road. In addition to a full tune-up, new battery, and new tires, special adaptations on Grady’s bike include a special foot peg and brakes that help Grady ride comfortably and safely. Grady thought he would never ride on two wheels again until VAMP made it possible. Grady says that being on his motorcycle is therapy to him and that having his bike back has been life changing.

HOW TO PARTICIPATE

Join an ever-expanding network of vendors, shops, and do nors helping to get wounded veterans back on their bikes and back out on the road where they can enjoy the freedoms of this great nation they have sacrificed so much for.

VENDORS

VAMP needs specialty parts according to each wounded vet eran’s injuries and their personal motorcycle make and model. We can use your help through donations or discount of these parts to make the dream of riding a reality again for more vet erans. Parts such as modified front forks, specialized clutches, reverse gears, push-button shifters and other specialty controls make the difference.

“Losing the ability to ride is like losing part of your soul”

SHOPS/INSTALLERS

VAMP needs shops and installers who may be willing to donate or discount their time to install the specialty parts for these wounded veterans.

DONORS

VAMP accepts donations from anyone willing to give in support of this great cause.

Veterans Adaptive Motorcycle Program, Inc. is a 501(c)(3) organization. Gifts are deductible to the full extent allowable under IRS regulations.

WHAT YOU RECEIVE

Above all else, we hope you take great satisfaction in restor ing the freedom to ride to wounded veterans and we know you will see the tangible benefits when each one rides away on their uniquely equipped motorcycle. In addition to this, we know that veterans support organizations that support their fel low veterans. For those vendors and shops that offer their parts and services, your company will appear prominently in future VAMP fund raising efforts and advertisements. In turn, you will be offered the opportunity to proudly display your support to VAMP in your own company’s advertising efforts.

CONTACT US TODAY TO DONATE!

Jack Stottlemire jack@vampusa.org

3rd Annual Guardians Of The Children Toy Run

By: Wally Wersching

he guardians oF the chiLdren (GOC) is an organization of bikers who educate the public on how to prevent, recognize, and react responsibly to child abuse. The Gastonia Chapter has been in existence since 2010. Dur ing that time, they have been involved in many child abuse cases in Gaston County.

On Saturday, November 5th, they held their third Annual Christmas Toy Run to raise mon ey and toys for the children. All toys will be donated to families in Gaston and surrounding counties who have contacted the GOC for help for Christmas. Any toys left will be distrib uted to families in need. Money from the ride will be used to buy gifts for older children. Any money left will be donated to the Gaston County Toy Run for Kids.

Registration started at 10:30AM at the Winner’s Circle Bar on Franklin Boulevard in Gastonia. Fees - $6.00 and an unwrapped toy, or $10.00 with no toy. The run was scheduled to leave at 12:00PM to ride a scenic route to R&B Pub House in York, SC, and eventually ending back at the Winner’s Circle for food, and Christmas cheer.

This was the first toy run of the season in the area. There will be many more before Christmas. All week I watched the weather forecast. They predicted rain all day on Saturday. The toy run would go on rain or shine. For once the weatherman was right. I awoke on Saturday morning to light rain but warm temperatures. It was supposed to get to almost 80 degrees by the afternoon - strange weather for November – even in the south. I checked the radar, and the main heavy rain wasn’t due

to hit until later in the afternoon.

I decided to go, and left home about 10:00AM in a light drizzle in my Miata heading east on Rt 74. I stayed on Rt 74 all the way into Gastonia. The Winners’ Circle Bar was on the right on the west side of Gastonia. After I parked in the lot, I brought a stack of Full Throttle magazines, and placed them on the registration table when I gave a donation. There were only a few bikes there – mostly club members.

As I started to walk around, I bumped into “Rooster” –“Cuzz’s” son. We talked for a long time about his bike – a low-mileage 1988 Harley FXR. I told him that I used to own a 1983 FXRT which is very similar except for the Shovelhead engine. His was an Evolution engine. We talked about its shortcomings and benefits. I think that it was one of the best models Harley ever made – smooth, agile, and very powerful. Then “Cuzz” came out of the Winner’s Circle. We all talked and laughed for quite a while. They let me take a photo of the both of them. “Rooster” looks a lot like “Cuzz”, only younger – sort of a before and after comparison.

I watched as many bikes rolled in - some in packs of five or six, and others came alone. If the weather wouldn’t have been threatening, there would have been a lot more bikers in attendance.

About 30 bikes came. At a little after noon, they had a meet ing. Since this toy run would not have a police escort, they had to do it the old fashioned way with “Road Guards” at the in tersection so everybody was told what to do when certain hand signals were given. After that, there was the prayer thanking God for the great weather, the sun was just breaking through the clouds, and asking God to bless all the participants.

As they were getting ready to ride, most of the people removed their jackets - to ride in their t-shirts. Then, the bikes left with a roar, they exited the lot onto Franklin heading west for the beginning of their ride on the beautiful back roads in the area.

Harleyween At Down Home Harley-Davidson

By: april roBertson Director of Marketing & events n octoBer 29th, Down Home

Harley-Davidson hosted Harleyween, an event to bring awareness and raise money for Kids Path. Kids Path is a specialized program of Hospice (now AuthoraCare) that supports children coping with serious ill ness and loss. Kids Path offers different levels of care when a child is diagnosed with a serious condition, including home health, case management and pediatric hospice care.

Through Kids Path’s grief ser vices, licensed counselors provide individual counseling, support groups and workshops for children aged 4-18 who are coping with the death or serious illness of a loved one. Kids Path staff provide care, as well as, an open heart and a listening ear.

Down Home Harley-Davidson raised $4,000 for Kids Path, that will go towards the Sam’s Wish Fund, a Holiday Cheer program that provides Holiday Wishes to local children and their families that are currently in Kids Path for life threaten ing illnesses.

This event was open to the public, and consisted of a Bike Show, Costume Contest, Trick-or-Treating, Raffles and more. The children that won in the costume contest were Eli Garcia, age 5, who was dressed as a Stormtrooper and Auburn Morse, age 6, who was dressed as a fox. In the 12 – 16 year old cat

egory the winner was Alie Blackwell was appeared as a witch. The winners in the bike show are 3rd Place – Gary Cashion – 2009 Boss Hoss B4C3, 2nd Place – Doug Adams – 2013 Road Glide Custom, and the Best in Show – Tim Griggs –1960 Duo Glide. The People’s Choice Award went to Josh & Courtney Ledford – 2002 Heritage Softail.

We would like to thank our employees and volunteers: April Robertson (Freddy), Dusty Harris (“The Dude”), Cody Wallace (Priest), Kristin Shipwash (Dark Angel), Alexis White (UPS Girl), Griffin and Jacob Hampton (Zombies), and Zach ary Pisani (Butcher).

We can’t thank our sponsors enough. Down Home HarleyDavidson, Jeff Throneburg Construction, O.K. Recycling,

We especially want to thank every one that participated in this event by contributing to Kids Path, you will never be forgotten.

When a child is diagnosed with a serious condition, the fam ily faces questions and challenges…Down Home H-D wants them to know that they are not alone!

Mayhem In Midway 2

One Man’s Bike Rally Is Every Neighbors Mayhem

By: lincoln infielD photos By: Daryl BreWton, arDvark & alan Dockery

ver have a crazy idea that worked out, so you decide to do it again? That was Mayhem In Midway. Last year we set out to have a good old fashioned ride-in bike rally and appropriately named it Mayhem In Midway. One, because it was in Midway, NC and two because it was Mayhem from the beginning. We had so much fun that we figured we were crazy enough to try it again. We got the blessings of the property owner, Lyn Shan non, to give it another go and the rest is history. This year’s event landed on Friday and Saturday, October 21-22. Friday is set up day with an evening party and Saturday is the main event.

Friday Night Pre-Party

Friday is an all-day parade of vendors and bikers arriv ing and setting up for the shindig and by 5pm it’s time to get down to business. The Carolinas’ Biker Lawyers make sure that we are going to kick the party off right by sponsoring a Keg Party. The Mayhem began immediately as I blasted myself in the face with ice cold beer while trying to tap the keg. Good thing there was a real professional there to show us how it is done, thanks Poindexter. The US Military Vets MC was over in the corner of the field of Mayhem cooking up some grub when The Stone Parker Band took the stage. We first heard this band at our 23rd Attempt Fear of February party earlier this year and knew that we wanted to have them play our next party. They did NOT disappoint. The beer was flowin, the tunes were rocking and we had food on site, the party was all going as planned. This year we weren’t as lucky with the weather and the Friday night temps were scheduled to get down in the 30’s, that kept the Friday night camping a little light, but it didn’t keep Davidson Counties Finest away.

As with any good party, the cops made a stop by due to some annoyed neighbors. No worries though, it was only 7:30 at the time and boys in brown determined that there was no harm in what we were doing. That night the bonfire raged into the night and it was great to get to hang out and do some biker camping with my friends.

The Dawn of Mayhem

Saturday morning comes early when you party all night. It comes especially early when the rooster next door doesn’t know the crack of dawn from the crack of its ass. That damn bird started up at 4:30 in the morning or as we like to call it… bedtime. The good news was that Shannon and Dexter Rights of Tom McGrath’s Motorcycle Law Group were cooking up breakfast at 9am. Shannon was flippin flap jacks and sausage patties on the flat top. They also had a cooler full of breakfast juice and enough hot coffee for an army. There was a steady line wandering up from the camping area to the Tom McGrath Motorcycle Law Group Tent to get some grub. The official gate time was 10am and it was a chilly morning. Bikes started rolling in around 11am and didn’t stop coming for the rest of the day. The delay allowed the Full Throttle Team to get set up for day. A lot goes into hosting 9 straight hours of biker en tertainment, and I couldn’t have pulled it off without one hell of a team. Maggie, Lucas, Lydia, Bad Brad, Joah, Travis, Doc, Daryl & Ardvark were in it to win it all weekend long.

Tom McGrath’s Motorcycle Law Group $1000 Bike Show

The Tom McGrath’s Motorcycle Law Group $1000 Bike Show has the biggest official payout of the day and is one hell of an undertaking by the Firm That Rides. Registration is FREE and begins at 10am for the five class bike show. Throughout the day Shannon, Dexter and Tyler painstakingly judge each of the over 50 entries bike by bike. The bagger and cruiser class are always swollen, but this year the pre-90’s and chopper classes were most impressive. A lot of good looking scoots in there and it made for a tight bike show! There were matching Shovelhead dressers, choppers of the Knucklehead, Evo and Triumph variety and a heck of a lot of chrome. Judg ing ended at four o’clock and Tyler Stiles took the mic on the field of Mayhem and called out the awards at 5pm. Best Chopper went to Gery Strutz and his 1997 HD Springer.

Best Bagger was won by Ben Ferguson’s 2020 Road Glide, Ricky Watkins’ 2009 Harley XR1200 took Best Sport. The Best Cruiser was Chris Johnson’s 2012 H-D Wide Glide and Best Pre-90’s bike went to Terry Schieble, one of the matching 1978 FLH Shovelhead’s in the show. Class winners won $100 each and an awesome custom trophies built by The Rebel Spirit. Best in show is always a tough call and the judges went back and forth before awarding Dale Cowen and his 1967 Triumph Chopper $500 and a custom trophy. Congrats to the winners and huge thanks to Tom McGrath’s Motorcycle Law Group, the Firm That Rides, for sponsoring and running the bike show!

Smokin’ Harley-Davidson Bike Games

Man, I love bike games. It’s when you get to really show off your ability to handle your bike and separates the bik ers from the riders. To make it interesting, our friends at Smokin’ Harley-Davidson threw in $500 in cash prizes for the winners! There was a huge crowd on the sidelines of the Field Of Mayhem as we called out riders for the first event of the day, the Slow Race. It took a couple rounds for Puput Yawana of Javasky Cycles to wear ‘em out on his Knuck lehead chopper, but it was a clear win and Julie of Smokin’ Harley-Davidson handed him a crispy $100 bill for his efforts. The plank ride was next. Starting from a dead stop, riders had to see how long they could stay on the five-inch wide, 18 foot long plank. A number of bikers tried, but only two made it the entire length and instead of a shootout, Angel and Gary decided to split the prize and took home $50 each. We moved on to Pick’em Up & Put’em Down. This is a two up timed game where the passenger must pick tennis balls up off of road cones, then the rider has to make a loop and get back to the cones where the rider has to put as many balls back on the cones as possible. The Field of Mayhem goes slightly up hill, so the turnaround proved to be tricky. Lots of balls were picked up and put down, but Steph and Special Ed had the fastest time and went home with $100. Next up was the weenie bite, no real explanation necessary here, right? This is always a fan favorite game. It’s not as easy as it looks folks! We had a bunch of attempts, a few faces smeared with mustard and 3 solid bites! Steph is the Gaston Co. weenie queen and was the strong favorite to win, but after the measurements were made, it was Felicia that took more of a mouthful and won $100. Last up was a Full Throttle Magazine classic bike game, Hit’er in the Shit’er. It’s like motorcycle jousting with pool noodles and the object is to penetrate a wooden cutout of a fat bottom girl. Hey, that’s what makes the rockin’ world go round. This game is obviously easier on minibikes, but completely possible with a full size motorcycle. Molly was the only one with balls enough to try it on a regular size mo torcycle and got the tip in a few times. But she was bested by Zach Shipwash of The Rebel Spirit who is an old pro with the noodle and was able to prove it on the Field of Mayhem. Zach snagged the last $100 bill from Smokin’ Harley-Davidson for his marksmanship.

Carolinas’ Biker Lawyers Bulldog Hero Awards

It was now 3pm and the frivolities of the day were paused for some serious business. Carolinas’ Biker Lawyers has been rewarding the charitable bikers of North and South Carolina for 10 years and have donated more than $120,000 to their causes. Eighteen bikers were nominated as Bulldog Hero hopefuls during September and then voted on by their peers during October. The nominees were all summoned to Mayhem In Midway to hear the results of the vote. Bob “Bulldog” Karney took to the stage with his wife Ginger and his law

firm partner Sean Clayton to honor all the nominees. Bob described the deeds that earned each biker a nomination to the Bulldog Hero Awards. He paused before revealing the top three Bulldog Heroes of 2022 to award all the nominees $300 towards the charity of their choice. Once the applause died down, he awarded Jimmy Street, President of the Ameri can Legion Riders of High Point Post 87 $2000 towards his charity of choice as the 3rd Place Bulldog Hero. Jimmy and his American Legion Riders have helped many vets in their community by installing handicap equipment such as hand rails, building ramps and buying groceries for those in need. He is a great man of morals, integrity & loyalty to all who call on him. Fontana Palmer was the 2nd Place Bulldog Hero and was awarded $3000 to her charity of choice for her amazing community work through her nonprofit, Rogue Active Duty Animal Rescue (RADAR). Fontana works tirelessly to rescue canine victims of sport fighting and assisting veterans with no/ low-cost care for their pets. The Bulldog Hero of the Year and $5000 was awarded to President of Guardian Of The Children High Country Chapter, Jerry Ball, to be donated to the charity of his choice. Jerry is a founding member of the High Country Chapter. Jerry has a heart of gold and gives tirelessly to the organization and the children of Wilkes and the surrounding counties. He is always wanting to help kids some way. All in all, The Carolina Biker Lawyers handed out to be donated to charity by the 2022 Bulldog Hero Nominees. Congratulations to the 2022 Heroes and a Huge Thank You to Bob Karney and the Carolina Biker Lawyers for their generosity.

Blue Collar Cycle Company Burnout Contest

As the Heroes were leaving the Field Of Mayhem, the shinanigans were about to start back up. The Rebel Spirit’s world-famous mobile burnout pit was brought out to the center of the field for the Blue Collar Cycle Company Burn Out Contest. Brandon, Brint, Beavis and Kaitlyn of Blue Collar Cycle Company had $600, three brand new tires, and charita ble donations to split with the top 3 burnouts. It always takes someone to put the smell of burned up rubber in the air to give the rest of the contestants some inspiration. Zach Curry took to the pit first on his street bike. He was giving it hell when the tire blew and exploded the rear end of the bike, sending parts flying and flayed his back a bit too! Holy Shit! We got the parts cleaned up and went back to burnin down! Waller talked one of his friends into letting him blow the tire on her bike, and so he did! He made some kodak moments schwill ing a bud light seltzer and enlarging the hole in the ozone lay er. His display only egged on the rest of the contestants. One after another contestants melted their tires, and Cecil Muncie left his brand new clutch on the Field of Mayhem. But it was Jesse Clark and Adina Baker who did a long, two up burnout. That had to be a new tire, its demise took well over 5 minutes. Jesse snagged a new tire, $300 and a charitable donation from Blue Collar Cycle Company. Waller was awarded second place and took home $200, a new tire and a charitable dona tion and Zack Curry took third place, $100, a new tire and a

charitable donation.

Clemmons Motorcycles Hard Ass Awards

Kenny and Mary Ann Gilley of Clemmons Motorcycles fully endorse all types of riding, but especially long distance riding. They lead dozens of weekend long biker adventures every year and embrace the very essence of riding. They brought a brand new award to reward the long distance riders who attended Mayhem In Midway, the Hard Ass Award. All day long riders checked in at the Clemmons Motorcycles booth to see how their ride stacked up with other riders. Kenny and Mary Ann took a pause in the action, armed with two sweet trophies built by The Rebel Spirt and $500 in cash to split between the man and the woman who put on the most miles on their way to Mayhem. Blake Allan rode 170 some miles from Fremont, NC and claimed the Hard Ass Dude award. Ninja Lee rode in from Lillington, NC, 110 miles away and snagged the Bad Ass Chick award and $250. Not bad, eh? Take a nice long ride to come to a old school biker party and snag a big cash prize and cool trophy. Huge thanks to Kenny and Mary Ann of Clemmons Motorcycles for recog nizing these road warriors.

Pandemonium Performance Custom Cycles Loud Pipes Competition

This is by far the most participated contest of Mayhem. Anyone who attended Mayhem In Midway is familiar with last years 20 minute Loud Pipes Contest warm up session orchestrated by rally spirit animal, Alabama. It was prob ably, the hardest part of last years event as well, from a event promoters point of view. Mayhem In Midway 2 was just nearly void of a Loud Pipes Competition until Mayhem CoConspirator, Kary Blaylock of Pandemonium Performance Custom Cycles threw down the gauntlet, and the sponsorship cash just a month out from the event. So when the time came, bikers and bikes of all shapes and sizes entered the Field of Mayhem to see just who was the loudest of them all. One at a time, contestants lined the end of their exhaust pipes up to the predetermined spot so that they were all equal distance away from the two decibel meters that were used this year. Each rider got three seconds to rev up their bike while their decibel level was recorded by the judging panel. It took a few minutes for our hearing to return so that we could announce the win ners. Joseph Franchi took home 1st place and $150 for blast ing 112 decibels, Zach Curry snagged $100 for 110 decibels and Joseph Swain came in third with 109.9 decibels and took home $50. Huge thanks to Kary Blaylock of Pandemonium Performance Custom Cycles for bringing this event back!

Jaybird’s Custom Cycles Ms. Mayhem Contest

Well now, what is a biker party without a wet t-shirt contest? Lame. Jay and his crew from Jaybirds Custom Cycles aren’t going to let that happen so they brought a dozen Jaybirds tank tops and $500 for first place in the wet t-shirt contest. Ya know, sometimes the ladies act shy, so flashing a handful of

cash can sometimes loosen them up a bit! By the time it was wet t-shirt time, we had 11 lovely ladies that were ready to bare it all to take home that first place prize. The ladies took the stage, the crowd gathered around, but something didn’t seem right. These 11 lovely ladies had 22 reasons that there needed to be more money involved. The generous crowd of classy bikers added $650 dollars to the cash prize. Now we are talking! Jay made the executive decision to make first place $650 and second place $500. Crank up the tunes and let’s let these ladies earn some cash! Three at a time, these gorgeous gals got doused with ice cold water and gave it all they had in an attempt to take home a wad of cash. Through audience par ticipation we whittled down the contest to two of our fulsome friends. Katie and Big Momma battled it out. They must have poured three gallons of icy water on their jugs keeping the crowd cheering before the final vote named Katie Ms. May hem 2022 and the winner of $650 a Ms. Mayhem sash and a beautiful tiara. Big Momma didn’t fair too bad with that $500 cash prize, but the real winners were all the spectators who got one hell of a show! Thanks to Jaybirds Custom Cycles for keeping this biker event a classy good time!

Dusk Falls On Mayhem In Midway 2

As dusk arrived at the field of Mayhem we lit some bar rel fires on the field and the bonfire got brought back to life. Bongo Bach set up one hell of a sound system for BoneDryver to absolutely kick ass as the headliner of the event. Some of the Ms. Mayhem contestants stayed at the front of the stage to “encourage” the band to keep rocking and we certainly ap preciate that as well. BoneDryver was awesome, they covered AC/DC, Bob Seager, Judas Priest and KISS among other rock gods and delivered a few ass kicking originals as well. It was a great way to finalize pissing off the neighborhood and bring ing Mayhem to an official close. The bonfire and the camp ground party raged into the night in an attempt to drown out the rooster. What a weekend.

As with any party, a lot of effort goes into making every thing seem like the event goes smoothly. The behind the scenes of the events are hectic and I can’t express how awe some all the people are who pitched in to make this event a success. Naturally, we couldn’t do this without our Sponsors: Carolinas’ Biker Lawyers, Smokin’ Harley-Davidson, Tom McGrath’s Motorcycle Law Group, Pandemonium Perfor mance Custom Cycles, A&M Crane & Rigging, Blue Collar Cycle Company, The Rebel Spirit, Jaybirds Custom Cycles, Clemmons Motorcycles Inc all came together to bring yall a party.

But..and I can’t stress this enough, there would NOT have been a Mayhem In Midway without our friend Lyn Shannon. The Field Of Mayhem is Lyn’s front yard. Last year, Mayhem In Midway was nearly a disaster, the original field of Mayhem was unsuitable, and Lyn invited us to have the party on her property instead. This year, we had to distinct honor to award Lyn with a plaque and a sash bestowing upon her the title of Mayor Of Mayhem. Thank you, Lyn, we love ya and can’t tell

you how much your friendship means to us.

My team was also absolutely awesome all weekend. My mom Molly, my wife Maggie, my brother and sister Lucas and Lydia all had my back the whole time. My boy Angelo booked the bands and helped trouble shoot. Joah and Travis dove in and helped us keep track of the field games and gave way more than I could have asked for. Bad Brad came out and helped run the gate with Maggie and Lydia, which is probably the hardest job on the field. Doc, Ardvark and Daryl captured every second of the action as my photographers and are re sponsible for all the amazing shots we have from Mayhem 2.

To be continued….?

Will there be a Mayhem In Midway III? Only time will tell, personally, I’m not ready to think about it yet. Instead, we are turning our attention to our upcoming bike show at the Greensboro Coliseum: The Carolinas’ Full Throttle Magazine Custom Motorcycle Show on January 14th. It’s gonna be THE east coast wintertime bike show and you don’t want to miss it! Check out the Cruisin’ Calendar and the ad in this issue for more information.....see ya there!

The 2nd Annual Jamie Taylor’s Last Leg Poker Run A Ride for Amputees

By: cinDy WelBorn

hristy and mark shropshire, aLong with a great group of volunteers, organized the 2nd Annual Jamie Taylor’s Last Leg Poker Run which was held on October 15th. Christy’s brother Jamie Taylor had to have his leg amputated in August of 2021 due to complica tions arising from his diabetes. A fundraising benefit was held in 2021 for Jamie and turned out to be a great success. We as a family decided to make this an annual event with a different benefactor each year going through similar circumstances.

This year, Annette Medley Morgan was chosen as the bene factor. Annette has also had to have her leg amputated below the knee recently due to diabetes. She has also suffered a bro ken hip and has to have dialysis for both kidneys. Through all of her suffering, Annette never asked for help from friends. In July, Christy made a Facebook post announcing that we were looking for someone in need to honor at the Poker Run. An nette’s daughter Kaitlin sent a message describing her mom’s troubles. Annette was selected on August 15th. While she never asked for help, Annette was grateful for the support the community gave her. However, I think she was more grateful just to see how many people cared about her and what she is going through.

The ride began at Karondas in Greensboro. Stops included: Corner Bar (Liberty), and Springers (Greensboro). It ended at Double D’s Burnout Saloon in Kernersville where the rid ers all enjoyed Brunswick Stew prepared by Tim and Diane Bailey and live music by Whiskey Cove. Jack Reeves won the Best Poker hand and received a $100 Harley-Davidson gift card. There were many raffle prizes, along with both silent and live auctions.

At the end of the day, Annette was handed over $4800. She had a full day of friendship and smiles all around and has said that she wants to be involved in this benefit every year from now on. We are so happy that we had another successful event and that we were able to help Annette and her family.

Good Ride!

13th Annual AMCA Southern National Meet

story By alan Dockery photos – alan Dockery, lincoln, Daryl BreWton

rememBer when we First discussed a nationaL antique motorcycle event in North Carolina.

Gonna do it at Denton Farm Park, great place for that. But will the modern riding crowd care about coming to see old bikes? Thirteen years later and this is one of the biggest and bestest motorcycle events in the Carolinas.

For 12 years we held the meet in mid-May. This year it was mid-October and could hardly have been a better day to enjoy old motorcycles. Bikers at Denton Farm Park, NC, for the An tique Motorcycle Club of America’s 13th Southern National Meet were there to soak it all in. Not only were there lots of cool old machines to check out, but there were plenty of bikes and parts for sale too.

The three sponsoring AMCA chapters; Blue Ridge, Legends and Catawba Valley; gathered in the perfect place since Den ton Farm Park enhances the antique experience with several old buildings featuring historical equipment and machinery, plus antique train rides. Other groups use the Farm Park for events featuring tractors, farm equipment, military vehicles and more.

A day at Denton goes by too fast. The Road Ride leaves at 9 am for a cruise through the countryside. Vendors are open and ready to sell. I gotta get back to shopping. Hey, the Mo tor Maids are gonna be here soon. Then the History in Motion Parade and Field Games and Bike Show …. Oh Man, I’m tired and my feet and legs hurt, and folks are packin up. I think I’ll take the four-lane home. Sorry to my friends who I didn’t get time to hang and talk with. At least we got a good wave or handshake.

The AMCA meet at Denton ain’t a snobby gathering of guys with high-dollar antiques. It is for y’all with clean old machines you found in a shed or the project bike you’d rather ride than restore. Motorcycles 35 years old are considered an tiques. So now there are Evo Harley antiques. Each year has

a theme. For this meet it was Generator Shovelheads. Those cool machines sold from 1966 – 1969.

As folks see what goes on at Denton there are more who come for the whole weekend. That gives them more time for checking out the vendors, bikes and hanging with friends. Camping at Denton Farm Park is nice with acres of cool, shady woods. I know you can buy everything online these days, but a real swap meet still has its advantages. Online you hope the part is what they claim and what you need. Buying in person at Denton you can examine the part, haggle with the seller and sometimes get an interesting story too.

History In Motion

About Noon folks line up for the History in Motion, a nar rated parade of antique motorcycles. Riders wait their turn to pull up to a spot, surrounded by folks, while each bike is described. History In Motion gives owners a chance to show and talk about their bike. Bikes you saw riding by and won dered about.

Next is the Vintage Motorcycle Field Games. Yeah, bike games on old bikes. You think it’s tough doing games on your new cruiser. Imagine doing them with hand shift and foot clutch. Some of the games might actually be easier on old bikes. The AMCA games are not only a good show, but they provide good seats, narration and commentary.

This year some of the kids took the field for games. Gotta teach them young’uns to ride and enjoy motorcycles. I was impressed how well some of those kids could ride and get into the games. That boy on the Minibike Chopper was having fun and the crowd loved him.

The bike show at Denton is for the common bike. Any bike could enter as long as it was old and ran. This is a cool little show with awards for things like Least Chrome to Most Cob bled. The show is one more chance to display bikes we have admired all day, from the perfect restorations to rusty relics.

We gathered at Denton for antique motorcycles. There are so many bikes that I miss checking out and photographing way more than ones I do. So many that I see go riding by and hope I can talk about later. You can see and talk to the owners of all kinds of bikes in various conditions. Not all bikes at Denton are sitting for display. Most are running and riding around the Farm Park.

Some folks expect to see lots of beautiful museum quality motorcycles cruising the Farm Park. There are some – perfect original, fresh restored, made from old parts bikes there. They stand out like jewels because those bikes are actually the mi nority. Oh yes, we love them and crowds gather to photograph and ask about the shiny old machines. You can imagine the work and love that went into those bikes.

Most of the bikes at the AMCA meet were less than museum quality. Lots of motorcycles that have obviously been ridden for a long lifetime. They range from fairly well maintained to rusty rat bikes, faded paint, rust and grease are cool now.

Guys And Gals From Different Kinds Of Motorcycling

Soon as I arrived at the first Southern National Meet at Den ton twelve years ago, I started seeing friends from all kinds of motorcycling and related activities. I found out that some Harley drag racing buddies are big into antique bikes. Bikers

I know from other kinds of racing, safety training, motorcy clists’ rights, off-roading were there.

It’s good to see those friends that you only see once or twice a year. And I was glad to see local buddies who ain’t been to Denton in a while and have old bikes. Some of those people at Denton are celebrities in our world and others. Being in NAS CAR country, it’s common to see drivers and crew members at events. Those, “Guys back in the shop” who built racecars and engines are old motorheads and enjoy Denton. Those are the guys telling stories to a group of us at any time or place during the meet.

Each year there is an honored guest for the Saturday ban quet. The AMCA Legends Chapter Legend of the year 2023 was Stephen “Doc” Hopkins. He opened Doc’s Harley-David son in Wisconsin almost 44 years ago. I know Doc from the drag strip. He has drag raced Nitro Fuel Harleys for 46 years. Held the records and won regional and national champion ships. Doc is a three-time Cannonball Racer. He is the only one with a perfect score to do it with a sidecar and passenger. If you have ever seen the famous Timeline Motorcycle – has seven engines from Flathead to Twinkie – Doc built that. Oh, and another legendary biker was at Denton, Pete Hill. I got

Mad Man Malpass

story anD photo By chris rasile

nother interesting character i met at the AMCA Denton meet was motorcycle stuntman Krazy Keith Kardell, known as Mad Man Malpass. He did many stunt gigs at the strip going back to the Dragbike USA days and at AHDRA events like in Sturgis. He told me he lives down here in South Carolina now.

My question for Keith was – Do you remember borrow ing someone’s motorcycle to jump off the back of some time in the mid-to-late 1980’s? What Happened at the Dragbike USA National Finals in Gainesville, Florida?

Well, what happened was – the borrowed motorcycle, either a Yamaha or Suzuki, took off without him. Keith missed grabbing the rear rack and the bike took off down the quarter mile by itself. He said, “Oh yeah, I remem ber. Why were you there?” I told him I watched the whole ordeal. We both had a good laugh about it. But I’m pretty sure the motorcycle owner and Dragbike’s Thomas E. Loughlin, Jr., were not overly impressed with Keith’s stunt that day.

Denton memories.

Pete and his wife Jackie to sign their book for me.

I’m so glad to see young people at Denton. We need to cultivate the love of antique motorcycles to ensure the AMCA survives and grows. From the 12-year-old girl riding Dad’s old Honda to the young teen going through the boxes that will someday be his first bike, the 20-something guy loading the Panhead he just bought, to the Chopper Guys, I try to tell them how welcome they are at The Southern National Meet.

I know many of y’all see yourselves in the young folks who are seriously shopping the Denton vendors. Now, we laugh about those broke young guys since we have for years dealt with bikers who have money and lots of bikes. But remember when we were the broke young guys trying to build our dream machines? Or trying to build something we could sell to buy a better bike. So, please welcome them, appreciate whatever machine they ride and help them enjoy it.

This year saw several folks who have worked The Southern National Meet for years retire and turn things over to some new members. I encourage my older buddies to retire from clubs and charities and such. Time to turn things over to the next generation. I remember talking to Bob Aton the first year and how excited he was to bring the meet to North Carolina. Bikers across the country can thank him for the last 12 years of fun at the farm park. I’m glad to see that same enthusiasm in the new meet director, Mike Bruso.

“It was a ton of work,” Mike said. “A whole new event for us. Definitely a learning curve. Super positive responses from people. We had our best camping year ever. I hope to in crease that and welcome people to camp at Denton. The most pre-registered vendors for next year we’ve had. Two thirds of the vendors pre-registered for 2023. We’ll be moving forward with some positive changes. We got an extremely positive reaction to moving to fall from the AMCA National.”

One of the changes Mike told me about is an All Class Motorcycle Show instead of the bike parade. That should give folks with nice bikes a time to show them off. Also gives people a chance to see some of the machines up close. Those bikes you see ride by and want to check out.

The 2023 theme is Choppers. Yes, Freakin’ Old Choppers. We love Old Choppers. Y’all always see lots of choppers at Denton, but next year they are the main theme. Hey Ramsey, we have to do the Old Choppers in front of the General Store photo again.

I asked Mike, As the new guy did you have fun? He was busy all weekend, but smiling at the field games. “It was a lot of work this year and a lot of learning experience,” Mike said. “I think I will have more and more fun as the years go on and I get into a rhythm. It was fun and challenging all at the same time. A different kind of fun.”

“Obviously I had to give up my vendor spots. I can’t vend anymore. I kinda miss that. Otherwise, it was great. I got to meet a ton of people and talk to a bunch of people I wouldn’t have talked to. This is such an awesome event. Somebody had to take it over and I was asked to.”

“Thanks to the chapters for making another successful meet.

Special thanks to Larry Offill who is in charge of the vendor spots. He did an amazing job of modernizing it. Put it online and made a digital map of the entire place,” Mike said.

The AMCA Southern National meet is the Carolinas’ event you must attend if you are into the history of motorcycles. Bikers can check out historic machines and spend hours talk ing to the guys who saved and restored them. You will see some of the oldest motorcycles running and rideable. You can buy bikes and parts to start your own project.

I wonder what cool stories you can tell about Denton next year. Make plans to camp, hangout, shop and enjoy old mo torcycles at The Farm Park October 12 – 14, 2023.

Built By Renegade

Photos By - Brad Patton / Model

H-D

AMRA At The Rock 31st Jim McClure All-Harley Nitro World Finals

story anD photos By alan Dockery

ctoBer at the rock is a great time and pL ace to enjoy Harley-Davidson drag racing. This year was a little chilly and damp, but Harley Drags Fans got a great show. Lots of race bikes were there for the American Motorcycle Racing Association’s 31st Annual Jim McClure All-Harley Nitro World Finals featuring the Ray Price Top Fuel Shootout at Rockingham Dragway.

Y’all who dig nitromethane-fueled Harley race bikes got a large dose with almost 30 of the roaring flame belching ma chines there. They might make your eyes tear up and nose run as they rattle your chest.

This was a unique event in that two racing associations held their finals that weekend. The All Harley Drag Racing Association event in September was rained out. So, this was going to be a points race for AHDRA and the AMRA finals. A hurricane canceled the AHDRA finals, so Rockingham ended the season.

The camping crowd was ready for a fall weekend at the Harley Drags. There with campfires, hot food and cold beer to share with old buddies. The Saturday and Sunday ride-in folks

showed up to get at least a minimum annual requirement of hot rod Harleys roaring down the strip. I tell folks if you can only make one day, come for qualifying since everyone runs a few times. This year, the best show was Sunday Eliminations. Some great passes as local favorites went rounds. There are lots of races at The Rock, but the Harley Drags are special.

Several of the machines that compete in the National Hot Rod Association Top Fuel Harley series were there. Jay Turner Racing is a Carolina team that for years dominated NHRA Top Fuel Harley and brings a few bikes to the strip. The quickest Nitro Harleys were at The Rock. And at the Harley Drags fans can walk the pits to check out the machines up close.

They only got in two rounds of qualifying Saturday. Overcast meant we didn’t get the coolest view in drag racing, sunsets at The Rock with Top Fuel bikes going down the strip. After qualifying the Straightwire Band played down at the main gate. I hung out there for a little while with folks, but was ready to warm up and lay down.

Sunday morning the fuel bikes got another round of qualify ing in and posted some better times than Saturday. Soon it was time for Opening Ceremonies and Top Fuel Harleys thun dering down the strip to start eliminations. Phyllis McClure was at The Rock remembering Jim who the race is named after. Ziggy Stewart, Jim’s nephew, still races the last bike from Jim’s stable of Top Fuel Harleys.

AMRA Ray Price Top Fuel Shootout

Twelve Top Fuel Harleys were roaring at The Rock and go ing for the AMRA Ray Price Top Fuel Trophy. A third of the field was Carolina teams giving the fans in the stands favor ites to cheer for. There is a reason so many of the best Nitro Harley races are on the East Coast. That’s where so many are

built and based. And raced.

Tracy Kile, Asheville, NC, and the Bad Apple team have been hot this season. Congratulations for winning the AHDRA Top Fuel Harley Championship this year. Tracy qualified second that weekend. Jay Turner, Julian, NC, was eight, Tii Tharpe, Pfafftown, NC, ninth and Mike Beland, Maiden, NC, qualified eleventh.

Sunday afternoon was the Jay Turner show, eventually posting the quickest time and top speed of the event. Jay may have been eight quickest in qualifying, but he ran the quarter mile in 6.315 seconds, 6.238 at 236.17 miles an hour, 6.207 and a 6.244 in eliminations. Jay is a two-time NHRA Champ and two-time IHRA Harley Champion. He had to take out other popular teams to advance, beating Tracy then Tii in the semis. Teammate and number one qualifier, Randal Andras, Amelia, LA, was his final victim. Jay has won lots of races, but it had been 12 years since he hoisted the Jim McClure Memorial Trophy.

Nitro Funny Bikes are very similar to Top Fuelers, smaller engine and they don’t have transmissions. High gear only. Armon Furr, Orangeburg, SC, is a crowd favorite since his Dad Bill was a Nitro Harley star for many years. Armon made it to the semifinals in the class.

Fans like Pro Fuel bikes. Especially when ten are fixing to make passes down the strip. These are the small nitro bikes with 120 cubic inch engines, carburetors and single speed only. But those machines still fill the air with nitromethane, rattle your chest and put down 7.30’s all day.

Sam White, Chapin, SC, was riding one of Johnny Vick ers’ awesome machines this season. They took the AHDRA Hawaya Racing Pro Fuel Championship this year with it. He qualified Number One with a 7.419 pass at 171.84 miles an hour. But there was a new rider qualified second and she was there to race, Mary Dangrow, Asheville, NC.

Mary is a rookie on a fuel bike this season and having fun. She’s a crew member on her boyfriend Tracy Kile’s Top Fuel

Harley so she is used to a winning team. Mary was going rounds, but faced Paul Anderson, Clarkston, MI, in the final. Paul is the new AMRA Champ in the class.

In the final round Mary beat Paul on a Hole Shot. Paul ran a quicker elapsed time of 7.385 to Mary’s 7.393. But at the starting line, Mary left first with a .130 reaction time to Paul’s .156. She got to the finish .018 seconds ahead of him for her first Pro Fuel Class win.

Jay Beasley, Winston Salem, NC, was riding Bobby Hoover’s pretty blue machine they call Miss Haley. Richard Boone, Mint Hill, NC, was also in Pro Fuel.Kevin Campbell, Southern Pines, NC, is the new AMRA Pro Gas Class Cham pion. Mike Motto, Richlands, NC, wrestles an Outlaw Street bike down the strip.

Baggers, or what us old guys call Dressers, are popular these days. Lots of them were roaring down the strip that weekend. Pro Dresser included Russell Smith, Rose Hill, NC, and Scoot Williams, Nashville, NC. I dig seeing those wheelie machines make passes.

Hard Charging Sportsman Racers

There were lots of Sportsman racers at The Rock and that’s where so many of my buddies run. I know some of y’all love the smell of nitromethane. But I dig that sweet scent of VP Race Gas. These are the bikes I would most like to borrow for the weekend. The fans love the classes too, watching riders try to hold down wheelies through the first couple gears as they make quick passes down the quarter mile on streetable bikes.

Freddie Frazier, Sanford, NC, made it to the semi-final round in Top Eliminator the quickest index class at 9.30 sec onds. Ken Strauss, Terrell, NC, also competed in TE.

Super Gas, the 9.90 class, always has a big field. Todd Hayworth, Mt Pleasant, NC, made it to the semifinal round. Joe Gladden, Gastonia, NC; Rick Medford, Cherokee, NC; Dave Minton, Trinity, NC, and Mike Best, Cary, NC, also ran

SG Class.

Cody Hayworth, Concord, NC, took the AHDRA Champi onship in the Super Pro 10.30 Class. But it was Joe Gladden putting the field on the trailer until he lost in the final round.

Pro Eliminator 10.90 index class had almost 30 bikes qualify for the field. Chris Phipps, Tabor City, NC; Mitch Dibble, Laurenburg, NC; Brent Carlisle, Tabor City, NC; Rob ert Muller III, Monroe, NC; Rick Medford, Cody Hayworth and Dave Minton were in that field. Cody Hayworth is the AHDRA Universal Fleet & Tire 10.90 Class Champ for 2022.

Travis Blanchenel, Zebulon, NC; Charlie Arge, Mooresville, NC; Craig Burch, Chapel Hill, NC; Joe Petersen, Wilming ton, NC; David Heuring, Wilmington, NC; Brett Carlisle and Chris Phipps competed in the 11.50 index Street Eliminator Class.

For many years now The Carolinas’ Full Throttle Magazine has presented a $200 Big Check at the Sunday morning riders’ meeting. We recognize the Dial-In Eliminator Class rider who has the best reaction time during Saturday qualifying. Thanks to Billy Jackson, Richard Stamey and Bill Rowe the pot this time was $500.

I found the winner, Scott Salisbury, Ladson, SC, in the stag ing lanes ready for the final practice. He posted a nearly per fect .001 reaction time. Told him to be at the Riders’ Meeting for the presentation. About 30 minutes later, a rider crashed right at the starting line. Didn’t look too bad since hadn’t gone far. He walked to the ambulance.

Well, come riders’ meeting time I couldn’t find anyone I was looking for. Finally, got Greg the AMRA Boss and the check and cash … but where is Scott? Then I heard him hol ler, “Over here.” as he climbed out of the ambulance. Oh No, it was Scott who crashed. Check out the photo of him with a bandaged shoulder holding the check with one hand.

Almost 60 racers came to the lanes for the Eliminator Class. Calloway Ledford, Sylva, NC, and Victor Allen, Southern Pines, NC, made it to the semifinal round. Carolina racers

also in the Dial-In ET Class: Billy Blocker, Walterboro, SC; Matthew Miller, Burlington, NC; Mark Taylor, Stanley, NC; Phillip Pheasant, Cherokee, NC; Richard Stamey, Wilm ington, NC; Sam Toineeta, Cherokee, NC; William Ragan, Goose Creek, SC; Chris Rasile, Brown Summit, NC; Justin Cook, Ocean Isle Bach, NC; Charlie Arge, Mitch Dibble, Joe Petersen, David Heuring and Craig Burch, This race was the end of an era in drag racing. The Steve Earwood Era. Steve has sold the drag strip that he owned for 30 years. Steve ran Rockingham Dragway and was a hero to racing fans for a long time. He is credited with making sanctioned straight-line racing nationally known when in the 1970s and early 1980s, he served as NHRA Media Relations Director.

Steve received the International Drag Racing Hall of Fame Founders Award in 2016. He is a member of both the East Coast Drag Racing Hall of Fame and the NHRA Southeast Division Hall of Fame. Steve is a founding member of the North Carolina Motorsports Association and has served on the Governor’s Motorsports Advisory Council. He worked hard to keep The Rock known as one of the country’s best drag strips in this constantly changing race environment. We are going to miss Steve. I look forward to working with the new owners of my favorite drag strip.

It was great to see friends I’ve known for many years and make new ones at The Rock.

Huck Around And Find Out

By: lincoln infielD

etting around on two wheeLs is key to LiFe as Far as I am concerned. So, when Monty Hen drix of Indian Motorcycle Greensboro Triad introduced me to the Huck Cycles, he has on the show room floor I was immediately interested. Huck Cycles is an electric bike builder based out of Cornelius, North Carolina that has produced two pretty rad models, the Overland and the Rebel. The Rebel is simple and minimalistic while the Overland has an intriguing industrial utilitarian design that hints to its on and off-road abilities. These bikes are designed with the out doorsmen in mind and are great for downtown traffic or entry level riders.

Huck Cycles classify as a moped with a motorcycle feel and both vehicles boast a digital heads up display that keeps track of your speed, battery life and mileage. Huck Cycles also feature LED headlight, taillights and turn signals as standard equipment. I was also impressed that they come with Michelin tires on the black spoke wheels, but you can upgrade the tires from dual sport to off road. The Overland is equipped with single 50ah battery that gives the 145lb, 49cc bike up to a 40-45 mile range with its 3kW nominal/6kW peak rated mo tor and can run a 2nd battery that will double the mile range. The Overland that I rode was sporting the Umbra Gray panel colors but is available in 7 colors including Jet Black, Ember Red, Moss Green, Dark Orange, Radar Blue and White.

Indian Motorcycle Greensboro Triad is located at the top of North Main St. in High Point, NC, so I got to experience the Overland’s downtown urban riding ability. The bike proved to be extremely nimble and silently zipped away from stop lights, accelerating in time with the larger vehicles while the front disc brakes provide plenty of braking power. The riding posi tion is comfortable and gives you the feel of riding a motorcy cle, while the 49cc displacement does not require a motorcycle

endorsement. The Overland frame caries a ribbed, throwback looking seat that was comfortable for downtown commutes to snag a bite or catch a meeting across town.

You can add an alarm or an extremely well built rear rack or front rack that would be handy for off and on road adventures to make this ride fit your style, vibe and outdoor needs.

The Huck Rebel was designed for those who want a truer moped experience. It is a retro-inspired electric moped, built by hand using as many locally sourced materials as possible. It has a clean and simple look to it compared to the Overland, but still has a 40-50 mile range and a load capacity of 350lbs. This model has a vintage design yet incorporates the benefits of today’s rad electric technology. Upgrades to the Rebel include different color patterns for the seat and the tank to customize this minimalistic scooter to your liking.

These extremely versatile NC made lightweight electric motorcycle can fit your downtown, off road, or campground needs. They are fun to ride, get the job done and are respect ably priced between $5,400-$5,800 for the standard models. If you are interested in taking a Huck around town, stop by Indian Motorcycle Greensboro Triad 2924 North Main St. High Point, NC, it might be just what you are looking for. Ya never know until you Huck around and find out!

Mark Deal Memorial Ride

By: chi

he mark deaL memoriaL ride took pL ace on sunday, November 6, 2022. It was a day in celebration, remembrance and honor of Mark Leo Deal; the legend he leaves with each of us: duty, honor, respect, hard work, family and community. Mark was a work hard, play hard, family man, best characterized as a motor cycle enthusiast and craftsman. Renowned for his love to ride, build and customized.

As go time approached, motorcycles, motor sports and cars begin arriving at Performance By Mark, “PBM”; at 309 East 2nd Street, Lumberton North Carolina. Mrs. Marilyn Deal pulled into the parking lot with a sassy red slingshot. She im mediately blew us a kiss!

Kickstands were up at noon, and Mark’s memorial was un derway, each stop designated as a specific location to celebrate the life of Mark Deal. In honor of Mark and his passion for riding the family spread ashes at each and every stop. Sym bolic in that, Mark touched so many people’s lives, evident this day as the biker community showed their reverence in his honor.

The group took off from PBM headed to the Redneck Yacht Club, which began a ceremonial sprinkling of ashes. The family took great pride in their approach with each individual venue. Next, they went to Legends Pub and the Drop Zone. There was a lot of fun on the ride. Marilyn and the family danced to the music, enjoyed the ride and had a toast to our beloved brother. All in celebration for Mark’s zest for life, family and community, focused around his passion for riding. The overwhelming love and respect for our dear friend, as we ride in unity for his memory and the wonderful person he was

to each and every one of us.

The ride continued, the next stop was the Wing Company and back to PBM. Each stop embraced the life and love for Mark. The ashes of his body; the love of his spirit; that was no doubt with us during the entire ride will he will remain in our hearts!

Marilyn Deal extends gratitude. She and the family are thankful for the support of the community, “…a wonderful ride for her husband! Thanks to everyone that could come out and make this day very special. I know he was with us the whole time and loved every minute of it!”

The honor was truly ours, to ride in memory of a legendary man, mechanic, brother, soldier and friend. An encoded mes sage from Mark, live a legendary life, he did!

Ride in Peace my friend!

Mark Leo Deal - A loving husband, devoted father, outstanding mechanic, and dear friend to all who had the pleasure of knowing him.

Mark is survived by his wife, Marilyn Rose Deal; children, Jennifer Applegarth (Griffin), Jeanna Deal, and Adrienne Deal; mother; Erika Deal.

Mark was born in Augsburg, Germany on July 8, 1958, to parents Erika Weidl Deal and Harold Leo Deal. Mark wed his beloved wife on June 4, 1989.

Mark served in the United States Army for six years before navigating to his true passion, motorcycles. Mark was an avid motorcyclist and thoroughly enjoyed exploring new places with his wife and friends. He opened up his own business, Performance by Mark, in 1997 which has flourished and gained him the title by many, as “Best Mechanic”.

PGR Mission For Charles “Wayne” Smith

By: Wally Wersching

he patriot guard riders (PGR) is a group of vol unteers dedicated to the honorable burial of fallen heroes of the military, law enforcement, and emergency responders. We are there to show that this country still remembers even after many years. A PGR Mission is to attend the me morial as invited guests of the family, and respectfully honor the fallen hero during the funeral service, and burial (some with full military honors).

I received an email inviting me to attend the upcoming PGR mission for 82 year old Wayne. I usually like to read about the person we are honoring, and maybe even see a photo. When I looked up Wayne’s obituary, I found out that he was a Vietnam Vet, and a biker. Later, I learned that he was a member of the California PGR.

The briefing was to be at the Stribling Funeral Home Chapel at 118 W. Main St. Duncan, SC at 1:00PM on October 24th. The group would escort Wayne to the Duncan Church of Christ cemetery for a 2:00PM service with Mike “YNOT” Pethuyne as the Ride Captain. I decided to ride to the cem etery, and meet the group when they rode in.

I went on-line to get directions to the cemetery. I’m not familiar with the Duncan area. I studied the map before I left home. I always like to look somewhat professional, so I put on my white long sleeve shirt and black leather vest. I left home at about 12:30PM. There was no easy way to get to the church.

I headed south to get onto I85 toward Greenville, SC. The interstate was still under construction, and traffic was heavy but moved along at a pretty good pace. I exited at the Duncan/ Moore exit to go to Duncan. After a few minutes of riding around looking for the roads on the map, I realized that I got off at the wrong exit. I got back onto I85 heading south

and went to the next exit. While riding on the outside lane getting ready to exit, I looked up at an overpass, and saw the street sign for Danzler Road. I knew that was where I wanted to be, but I had to get off at the next exit a few miles away and find my way back to the church.

I eventually arrived at the church at about 1:40PM and noticed that the rest of the group had already arrived. I learned that Wayne’s cas ket was already in the church. Minister Daniel Koen and Jimmy Johnson were officiating the service in the church along with the graveside service. Military honors were provided by two US Army enlisted men.

We waited for the service to start at the scheduled time of 2:00PM but it didn’t start until about 2:30PM. We all were given a flag so we could form a flag line along the path of Wayne’s casket as it went from the church to the gravesite. Then we took our stations where the flag line was split on either side of the tent. We listened while Minister Daniel Koen read from the scriptures, and they played some music.

The service was not exceptionally long but we were stand ing in the hot sun. I could feel the sweat running down my back under the heat of the black vest. One of the men in the flag line felt light-headed and gave his flag to the man next to him. He went to a shady spot to get a drink of water. Standing motionless in the hot sun is no fun.

When the service was over, we handed in our flags and went back to our bikes. While there, one of the family members came by to thank each of us for standing up for Wayne. I told the lady that it was our honor to be there for him. He would have done the same for us if he could. She agreed.

It was a great way to spend an afternoon – honoring a real American hero.

All Harley World Shootout Harley Drags At The Farm

he aLL harLey worLd shootout series Finished the season at Farmington Dragway in North Carolina. This famous old drag strip is one of several in Western NC and was packed with fans the first weekend of November.

AHWS events are managed by Paul Watson of Lumbee Rac ing and he puts on a great show for Harley drags fans. I know y’all dig Harley Drags at The Farm for many years. Besides thundering Harleys roaring down the strip, there was much more to entertain folks.

Fans could shop vendors or walk the pits talking to race teams. There were plenty of vendors there with all the cool things bikers need.

Tilley Harley-Davidson, Statesville, had a nice big setup in the staging lanes. I saw several of the Tilley family members and employees at Farmington. Miss Vickie was greeting folks like she does at the front desk. Love those folks and

their friendly family-owned dealership. The Tilley’s have a long racing history since Don Tilley was famous for building Harleys that whupped the rest of the world in several types of racing for many years.

Law Tigers NC East, Axtell Cylinders, Jet-Hot, Casey’s Tire and Automotive, Coldwell Banker, Alpha Mortgage, Impex GMC, Chevrolet, and Buick, CycleDrag, D.M.E. Racing, and The Lumbee Tribe of NC were on the property as a few of The AHWS’s corporate sponsors.

Tim Matts, from Detroit Michigan, took his Pro Extreme Outlaw Minibike down the track against a Harley and ran 6.79 seconds at 91 mph. Doug Dixon had the Carolinas’ Full Throttle Magazine Minibike Series on a tear this year. Paul says big things are coming for the Minibikes in 2023.

BackYard Baggers Joey Hensley held a Custom Bike show and a Sound Competition contest with multiple class winners. It is fascinating to see the custom baggers gathered back there. And the power plus sound quality that some can generate is impressive.

The All Harley World Shootout is about racing and action on the strip. Friday was just test and tune and grudge match racing. Bring your quick bike, maybe bet a little and have fun. Saturday the AHWS gets busy and is an all-day party at the drag strip for bikers. Fans showed up and the support was amazing. The AHWS just continues to grow and grow. It is becoming its own brand in the Harley race arena.

Folks come to the starting line when Andy Simon and his son Andy Jr. bring that pretty red machine down front. But when you make lots of power you also break things. During the burnout, the bike made some horrible noises. All that horsepower blew the motor apart. Rods busted the bottom of the engine, and the force was so much it split the transmission too. Oh Man, I wanted to see that bike bust records.

story anD photos By alan Dockery

Richard Stamey did the stunt show this time. Not on pur pose. That Blue Bike hooked up and wheelied and throwed him off. Straight down on the track. The bike came to a stop couple hundred feet down the strip. He’s OK.

Billy Leonard rode one of the coolest street and race bikes at Farmington. He did the body work building those stretched bags and fender matching his longer swingarm.

Yes, Metric Motorcycles were there. Paul invited them to run a couple classes hosted by Frank Loney of Loney Motor sports. Do that and they will show up and bring some nice machines. The Freak Show was at The Farm. I dig Frank’s Old SOHC 750 Honda. Paul puts up a few hundred extras in the purse for Harleys to beat the Metric Bikes.

A few rounds of qualifying and it was time for eliminations and see who would be holding the belts in the Winner’s Circle. Sadly, the rain that stayed West of the strip all day made it to Farmington in time for the final rounds.

Winners were decided and purse and belts awarded. Class winners for the AHWS: Street ET - Michael Thompson; Pro ET - Jim Vanfleet; Non-Bagger - Jason Crisp; Hot Rod Bag ger - Chandler Scott; Pro Comp - Scott Williams and Victor Gotay; Metric ET - Terrance White.

“We had a 123 bike field at Farmington Dragway and it will continue to grow,” Paul Watson said. “Thanks to our sponsors we paid out this year $49,600 in race winnings and if we could have gotten the Finals in it would’ve been $50,000 to our rac ers for the 2022 season. I was gonna add that $400 somehow. Next year expect even bigger purses in all the classes. We will truly have a race series with points for the Harleys and Met rics. I plan to finish at Farmington Dragway with the finals.”

“First race of the 2023 season is back at Farmington Drag way for the AHWS Spring Nationals April 14-15. Mark your calendars because it will be a huge race. Carter Racing and PoorBoyz Racing will be our host race team at the season opener,” Paul said.

“I want to thank all of our sponsors, my teammates, the vendors and the fans. Also, would like to thank Harley-David son Corporate for coming on board, Simon Motorsports and FreakShow Racing. This was a great year and get those builds ready. 2023 is right around the corner.”

Minibikes At The Farm

story anD photos By alan Dockery

he L ast Few years miniBikes have Become popuL ar in a few ways. Guys are restoring antique mini bikes. Building beautiful customs for shows, and of course, racing the little machines.

I mean minibikes, not small motorcycles. And I mean grownups, not kids. Minibikes are making a huge resurgence in new sales to all ages. You can buy them for kids with a 79cc motor and big campground minibikes for adults to haul in their RV.

Minibikes were popular in the 1970’s, lots of us Old Guys wore them out in the local fields and woods as kids. Our fam ily had a Heathkit Boonie Bike. That big rear tire was good in the sandy orange groves. Before the Federal Safety Nazis took over the roads, kids to adults rode minibikes to work.

For years I mostly saw minibikes as pit bikes or dead in a yard sale. The market was full of cheap, small motorcycles, so who needs those old things. But Old Guys like the old things we had when young. And Young Guys were buying them for cheap fun. Then we raced them.

First time I remember was at the Bowling Green Harley Drags and they needed some time filler for the final rounds. We had a Toby Race. Bring your Tow Bikes to the staging lanes. Then at the Farmington Smoke Out, Shawn recruited some of us riding minibikes for a race. Simple oval, try not to crash. I got Black Flagged cause an open beer in my basket fell over and was spilling on the track. Then the Smoke Out moved to Rockingham. Let’s drag race.

Now folks across the country are building serious racing

minibikes. Hey, it’s cheaper, smaller, easier to work on than a big bike. You can store a minibike in an apartment and trans port in a truck or SUV.

Paul Watson runs the All Harley World Shootout Series of drag races. In 2021, I asked if some buddies could run exhibi tion passes on quick minibikes. Soon, The Carolinas’ Full Throttle Magazine Minibike Drag Racing Series was launched as three more classes at Paul’s races. For 2022 Doug “Hippy” Dixon and Hannah Stewart took over managing the minis and have done a wonderful job. They are wired into all spectrums of minibike racing and have grown the fields. At the Farming ton AHWS Finals was one of the biggest, organized, serious minibike drag races I know of.

Racers came from Florida and Michigan to compete under the classes and rules Hippy is refining. They also enjoyed his Southern hospitality of hot fresh breakfast and steaks right off the grill. Most of the weekend you could find Hannah at the Tech Booth in the middle of the Minibike Village at The Farm. That part of the property was fun. Folks prepping race bikes. Kids riding around the open field. Evil Carl Wilson riding around. No, he didn’t jump two trucks on the minibike that

weekend. I have the T-Shirt.

Harley race fans seemed to be impressed with the elapsed times and miles an hour the minibikes were running. Rain ended eliminations a little early, so winners were declared based on time slips for the day.

Super Stock Class – 1. Aiden Smith 9.465 @ 71.38mph; 2. Sam Blackburn 9.627 @ 73.06mph; 3. Roger Yeargan 10.171 @ 68.51mph

Small Block Modified – 1. Chance Storey 8.424 @ 80.49mph; 2. Sam Blackburn 8.633 @ 77.9mph; 3. David Bridges 9.483 @ 67.23mph

Pro Extreme Class – 1. Sam Blackburn 8.027 @ 78.81mph; 2. Robert Danielson 8.263 @ 76.36mph; 3. Phillip Green 8.584 @ 76.49mph

“Thanks to Richard Stamey Racing for additional $100 purse money for each class,” Hippy said. I think that meant at least $500 to the winners.

Season Champions were awarded at Farmington also.

Super Stock Class – 1. Chris King 256; 2. Tony Witz 200; 3. Chance Storey 132.

Small Block Modified – 1. Chris King 248; 2. David Gur ganious 113; 3. Joshua Arch 100

Pro Extreme Class – 1. Joshua Arch 200; 2. Chris King 188; 3. Tony Witz 100

“We had a record turnout of minibike racers at Farmington for the Finals,” Hippy said. “Racers came from Michigan to Florida and everywhere in between. We solidified the mini bike show as part of the program. And there is more than just

racing. We have been putting on minibike shows at the events as an added draw. Not everyone races but everyone is proud of what they have built.”

“Had literally hundreds of spectators and racers come through the minibike village to ask questions and see what we were up to. Great fellowship was had, and friendships were forged,” Hippy said.

“There was a bike that didn’t pass tech inspection. It was faster than any minibike we’ve ever seen. Did not fit into any of our classes, so we will create an outlaw extreme class next year. But at Farmington we set up a grudge match race with that bike against a Harley for $1,000. Tim Matts from Michi gan ran a 6.79 at 91mph to beat Brian Peters on a 2015 Road Glide.”

“For the people who asked about how to get involved in minibike drags, join The Carolinas’ Full Throttle Magazine Minibike Drag Racing Series Facebook page for current events and rules. A Rules Summit is happening soon, and we plan to lock them in for the next three years. A sincere thank you to FMJ Racing for all that they do to help our series.” Hippy said.

If you want to see some great video of the Minibike Village and Races, including Tim beating Peter on the Harley, go to Cycle Drag on Facebook and You Tube. Jack Korpela does an excellent job of covering drag racing and presenting it for us to enjoy.

Next year the minibike drags are gonna be even cooler.

Ray Spencer - Universal Customs Keeping The Carolinas Old School

iding a motorcycLe is aLL aBout Being an individual. Your motorcycle is an extension of your persona and the first thing that we do, or want to do, when you get a new bike is to make it your own. That can consist of taking the stock parts off your bike, adding chrome, changing the pipes or several other things. But no customization is more individually unique than add ing some pinstriping. Each and every hand pulled stripe is a one-off creation that may be similar but never a duplicate. Ray says, “From a pinstripers perspective there’s only so many different styles of lines. But when you have unlimited mil lions of combinations of color or how thick or thin you want your lines, the results are endless”. Mild to wild Ray Spencer can add some of this old school flavor to your bike and we are lucky enough to have him as part of our biker community here in The Carolinas. I asked him how he got his start, Ray jokingly said that he, “Saw an ad in the back of a magazine, sent in $2 and got a diploma”. He actually fell in love with air brush work at the age of 16 when he happened upon an artist airbrushing at a local mall. Ray then received an airbrush kit as a present two years later in 1988. “I was hooked” he said. He’s been perfecting his trade for more than three decades and has been employed in the private sector by NASCAR Winston Cup Teams, producing signage for the PGA Tour and has had his art/prints shipped to over 30 countries worldwide.

Now Ray is proficient in airbrush, gold/silver leaf, hand lettering, pin striping and full-on custom paint jobs, but will admit that he’s come a long way. “The first lines I made looked like crap” Ray said and added it took lots of practice and pushing himself to get to where he is today. Ray has a studio at his home in Pinnacle, NC where he can customize

your motorcycle. The studio is currently large enough for one bike at a time, or as many parts as you can ship or drop off. In the near future, Ray has plans on expanding his shop to handle multiple bikes. On top of doing work out of his home studio in Pinnacle, NC, Ray can be found striping on bikes at events around The Carolinas and beyond. Recently Ray and a team of talented pinstripers were picked up by a small company named Harley-Davidson and have been hitting all the big rally spots. He and his crew worked 8-hour days pinstriping bikes at Sturgis. Ray said they “lost count after 228 bikes in 7 days.” That’s really putting in work! Although Ray’s art is top notch and being sought across the country, you don’t have to spend a fortune adding some pinstripe flair to your ride. “It doesn’t matter what your budget is, if you have $60 and you want something done, we can make that happen. If you have a bike that you want to spend some of your hard earned money on,

Don’t know what you are looking for but want a little flair added to your ride? Ray is undoubtedly one of the nicest guys in the Carolinas and has no problem figuring out what his customers are looking for. Just give him an idea, direction or just some colors that you like, and he will make it happen. Not only will you be getting some awesome custom work added to your bike, but you will be continuing one of the cool est old school art forms in the custom culture. If you see Ray Spencer and his Universal Customs booth set up at an event, make sure you stop by and check him out. Ray is also being featured at the Full Throttle Custom Bike Show on January 14th at the Greensboro Coliseum where he will be doing some live pinstriping! You can also be looking him up on the social media platforms. Instagram: ColorMeGone1970, Facebook: Universal Customs or you can do it the old fashioned way and give him a call at 336-345-7936.

Stop in on our YouTube Channel and watch the interview!

Scan this QR code to get there on your phone!

we can do that too. Whatever you budget is there is something I can do for you.”

GOC 2nd Annual Fall Car And Bike Show

By: Wally Wersching

n octoBer 22nd, the Gastonia chapter of the Guardians of the Chil dren (GOC) held their 2nd Annual Fall Car and Bike Show at the Family Pizza galli restaurant on Gastonia Highway in Bessemer City, NC from 12 to 3:00PM. The weather was perfect – sunny with temps in the 60’s. There were awards for the “Dirtiest Car/Bike”, “Best En gine Compartment”, “Best Paint”, “Best Helmet”, “Mr & Mrs Showoff”, “Kids Choice”, along with “Best of Show”.

I asked my wife, Cindy, if she would like to go, and she said yes. So, after we had lunch, we drove the Miata head ing east on Rt 74. We exited at Rt 161 and turned left. We followed the road through Bessemer City and continued toward Gastonia. The Family Pizzagalli was on the left.

We arrived at about 12:30, and there were many cars and bikes already at the show. I dropped off a few magazines at the registration table when I gave my donation. Then we started to walk around. The first person we saw was “Cuzz”. After talking with him for a

few minutes, we continued walking around looking at the bikes and cars. Cuzz had his bike in the show trying for the dirtiest bike trophy.

There was a good mix of out standing cars, trucks, and bikes. We watched as some of the owners were wiping the dust off their cars as we walked by. The show was very diversified.

One unusual bike was a moped that originally had a 50cc two-stroke en gine but was converted to all electric. We talked with the owner, and he said that he has been riding that bike up to 75 miles an hour. I told him that he was nuts with the narrow tires and bicycle brakes.

After walking around a couple times, we left heading back home. It was a great way to raise money to stop child abuse.

There’s No Replacement For Displacement? Tiny’s Tales From The Road

By: Derek sikes

or the typicaL rider oF a modern american vTwin it’s not about how fast the bike can go, it’s about how fast you can ride your machine. Any late model motorcycle can go fast enough to get you in trouble. Proving your prowess as a rider has always been more about skill and experience than outright speed, but that’s not as fun to talk about with your buddies. Imagine try ing to explain counter-steering after 3 tall boys and a couple shots. It is much easier to shout dyno numbers over the juke box and make grunting noises in approval, or disapproval.

The last few years have seen styling trends become more performance oriented. Medium height semi-narrow handlebars that are comfortable and give you plenty of leverage, im proved brakes, stickier tires, all designed to make the most out of heavyweight muscle bikes. Overall, I love this direction, almost as much as I love the idea of reducing unnecessary weight, but for ultimate comfort and mediocre performance upgrades, it’s a step in the right direction.

Since the early days of American motorcycling finding ways to make your motorcycle accelerate faster and obtain a higher speed without turning into a grenade has driven the industry forward. The post-war years saw an explosion of aftermarket parts manufacturers which resulted in a cat and mouse game of performance improvements between the aftermarket and the motorcycle manufacturers. Here we are almost a century later enjoying the fruits of their labor. Things we take for granted like hand clutches and foot shifters were once an aftermarket accessory designed for increasing the speed of the American V-Twin.

Here’s a little HD history, the 74” was the biggest fac tory stock overhead valve motorcycle engine available from Milwaukee for more than half a century. A 61” Knucklehead is close to the same displacement as a late Ironhead Sport ster. 74” in metric is close to 1200cc, again, about the same displacement as a late model Sportster. In a nutshell, the iconic “Big Twin” motors that have made the Milwaukee motor com pany a legend were the same size as a “modern” Sportster.

Legend has it that a couple of California’s original “Wild One’s” figured out that you could make an 80” Flathead crank work in a Knucklehead and build a stroker (increased displacement by way of increasing the stroke of the piston) that appeared stock from the outside and raced it all the way to Daytona from watering hole to watering hole, filling their pockets with greenbacks along the way. The aftermarket was happy to sell you upgrades to help you circumvent the EPA compliance restrictions that kept the factory from offering you big displacement motors, but the technology of the time was a limiting factor. It wasn’t until the last years of the Shovelhead that an 80” was available from the factory, and by this time they were seriously behind the aftermarket when it came to cubic inches and horsepower.

While we love our massive, air-cooled cubic inch machines,

elsewhere, manufacturers were making speed with small dis placement machines capable of higher Revolutions Per Min ute. Less rotating mass can spin very quickly to make speed, but it doesn’t really give the rider the same sense of power. That sense of power (and aesthetics, of course) is probably the thing that kept an inefficient design relevant long passed its expiration date. The simplicity and room for improvement is what keeps our love affair spicy, let’s face it. You can go buy a machine capable of getting you into the 200 MPH club on the salt flats for less than a new pick-up truck or touring motor cycle, but where’s the fun in that?

Just for perspective, you probably already know this, but the smallest factory “Big Twin” currently available is a 107” and you can upgrade to a factory 131” motor. That’s a lot of cubes, but physics and pollution abatement are a thorn in your side if you want to make power under warranty.

If you’re like me, bad credit, a meager pension, and variable disposable income, you know, a “Real Biker” (I joke, kind of) and don’t have the option of financing a new monster cubic inch machine there’s plenty of options out there for a “work ing class” budget. An early twin-cam with a measly 88 cubic inch motor and a mere 5 speed can be had for the price of a used late model Sportster and an Evo era Dyna or touring bike for maybe a few dollars less. The aftermarket for the Evo and Twin Cam sorted it out years ago. A little head work, a cam upgrade, and even bolt on big bore kits can produce enough power to keep up with most M8’s on the road. Split your cases and go big if you want to embarrass them. Sure, you might not be as reliable as a stock bike from that era, but there’s a good chance you’ll be at least as reliable as the new motor while the MoCo works out the bugs (congratulations if you own a new one, you’re paying to Beta test and provide R&D feedback).

The downside is that you’ll be doing it without a factory war ranty. There’s always a catch! That’s not a dig at our beloved big orange and black shield company, that’s just the reality of owning late model vehicles. There’s always a sweet spot in the production arch of any motor. Collectors love First Year models. I’ve found the best years for any model are normally the middle to late years. There are exceptions. That’s a vintage motor rabbit hole, but at least with vintage models you get that 20-20 hindsight vision. An aftermarket motor might be the middle ground for breathing new life into an older machine. Ultima and S&S are both producing big inch Twin Cams that make a lot of power reliably and have warranties.

Winter gives you some time to ponder these things (depend ing on where you live in the South), and it seems like by the time Daytona Bike Week or your tax return gets here you’ve come to a decision. You walk into any dealership or indepen dent bike shop, you notice it’s cold (they can’t afford heat, you haven’t seen them since October) and you’re ready to spend money and put the mechanic to work, only to find out the parts or model you want is on backorder and the shops booked for the next three months. If you’re reading this in the current issue, I’m pleading with you, plan ahead! As someone who has worked in this industry for a few years, we already know winter is coming, and we probably can make it, but this is a really good time to do the heavy lifting work, be that engine swaps, transmission upgrades, etc. There’s nothing better than breaking in a fresh top end in cool crisp weather after a few weeks of icy roads and no riding.

Honda Reveals New “Bagger” Rebel And Returning Motorcycle Models For 2023

nov 7, 2022 – alpharetta, georgia or the 2023 modeL year, american honda announces the return of 11 on-road motorcycle models. From cruisers to miniMOTOs, scooters and sport bikes, the announcement includes a diverse range of motorcycles that showcase the breadth of Honda’s lineup.

The highlight of the announcement is the new “T” trim level of the Rebel 1100 platform. The Rebel 1100T DCT builds on the success of Honda’s “new-school” cruiser platform with “bagger” styling (including wind protection and substantial cargo space), as well as Honda’s advanced dual clutch trans mission (DCT). In addition to this new version, the standard Rebel 1100 is back in both manual-transmission and DCT iterations. Other confirmed returning 2023 cruisers include the Rebel 500 and 300—offered in several trim levels and new colors for 2023—as well as the classic Shadow Aero and bobber-inspired Shadow Phantom.

“This announcement covers nearly every category of onroad motorcycle, which is a testament to how deep our product offering is,” said Brandon Wilson, Manager of Sports and Experiential at American Honda. “While each model has a distinct goal in mind, they all benefit from Honda’s renowned premium build quality and reliability. Whether it’s for the first-time rider or the weekend warrior, we’re committed to delivering the best possible ownership and riding experiences to all of our passionate two-wheel customers.”

REBEL 1100

In just the two short years since its introduction, Honda’s versatile Rebel 1100 has made waves in the cruiser market, with a “new-school” cruiser design that’s equally adept at re

laxed Sunday outings, dynamic backroad carving and longerdistance highway touring. For 2023, the platform is even more capable, with a new “T” trim level that offers “bagger” styling and convenience. The Rebel 1100T DCT comes standard with a large windscreen, as well as hard saddlebags that offer a combined 35 liters of space, giving riders added comfort and cargo storage.

Still available are the two standard Rebel 1100 versions (manual transmission and dual-clutch transmission), making for a broadened cruiser platform capable of delivering myriad riding experiences. All three versions feature a high-perfor mance, water-cooled parallel-twin engine with plenty of power

for the highway and acceleration for spirited riding, along with comfortable ergo nomics, a relaxed riding position and sporty handling.

More than any category, cruisers are about customization—for performance, ap pearance and convenience—and Honda makes that possible with a long list of Rebel 1100 accessories, from minimalist to tour-focused. Examples include cowls, bags, seats, backrests, short fenders and tank pads, heated grips, alarms and more.

These motorcycles available in December, have detailed features and benefits online at their website, Honda Powersports News.

From The Bitch Pad Waiting For Wheels – Part 1

By kathy lynn parnell

o, my honeyBun and i traded oFF our wheels mid-June of this year and ordered a brand spankin’ new bike from the factory. We were sad to see Willow go. After all, in six short years, she gave us 50,000 miles of smiles. I have yet to find out who took her home so I can check to see how she’s doing. Of course, the dealership can’t tell me who purchased her, so I will have to keep my eyes peeled for her on the road. As My Man was “building the bike” with the dealer, I soon found out that the new bike would not be in our garage until at least September.

W H A T ? ! ! !

Yes, I know time flies, but my heart sank. We actually didn’t know what to do with ourselves. We took the car out for a spin down some of our favorite roads, but it’s just not the same. We went to the mov ies, we went for walks, and so on. It was also difficult to visit biker-friendly places, for obvious reasons.

Well, the Summer is gone and September & most of October came and went! By now, we are totally frustrated. There was a great deal of communica

of 2

tion from the dealership and the powers that be, but no one could pin down a delivery date, with the usual excuses… COVID-19, supply chain issues, reduced skilled workers, blah blah blah. And, to top it all off, North Carolina’s temperatures plummeted overnight. It’s bloody cold out there. Me and My Man know how to pile on the layers, but this just added to our disappointment.

Whoo! Hoo! We have a date! We are ecstatic! But, hey, I will not get truly excited til I see two wheels parked on our driveway and my butt is firmly planted on the Bitch Pad. Up date – the bike has arrived and is sitting in her crate! Spectacu lar news! Welcome, Jade. She’s in there somewhere. Honey Bun wants to customize, so the wait continues…

Author’s background – Kathy started riding the Bitch Pad later in life after HoneyBun entered the scene & when asked why she doesn’t ride her own bike, she’ll comment that she’s “an accident waiting to happen” & she “trips over her own feet”, never mind “getting lost in malls”! No microphone or Bluetooth for this chick, just the sounds of the bike, the stereo & the world around her. She can sleep while riding, which is crazy but true. She has a camera that takes great pictures on the fly & enjoys regaling anyone within ear-shot about a memorable ride.

Real Meaning

hanksgiving wiLL Be here and gone By the time this issue is out and I just wanted to ask a question. What are you thankful for? A lot of people are writing on Facebook each day what they are thankful for and that’s great, instead of writing something in November we should be writing something each day of every month.

I’m thankful for the many years I had with Tank and for my kids and grandkids, and all the memories we shared. I’m thankful for my life with David now and the things we share and the memories we’re making.

If you’re still above ground, you have a lot to be thankful for. You should thank the good Lord for waking you up each morning, and your health good or bad. The most important thing is that the Lord hasn’t given up on you. I would hate to think where I would be if he gave up on me.

Daniel 2:23 I thank you and praise you, O God of my fathers, You have given me wisdom and might. And have now made known to me what we asked of you, For you have made known to us the Kings demands.

Luke 2:7, 9-14 And she brought forth her first born son and wrapped Him in swaddling clothes, and laid Him in a manager, because there was no room for them in the Inn. 9) And behold an angel of the Lord stood before them and the glory of the Lord shone around them, and they were greatly

afraid. 10) Then the angel said to them, Do not be afraid, for behold I bring you good tidings of great joy which will be to all people. 11) For there is born to you this day in the city of David a savior who is Christ the Lord. 12) And this will be the sign to you. You will find a Babe wrapped in swaddling clothes lying in a manger. 13) And suddenly there was with the angel a multitude of the heavenly host praising God and saying. 14) Glory to God in the highest, and on earth peace, good will toward men.

I want to wish everyone a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year.

In His Wind, Ms. Pat

The Carolinas’ Full Throttle Magazine staff screens hundreds of jokes each month. We make no claim to being politically correct. Most PC jokes just aren’t funny. If you are offended by any of the jokes on this page, take heart in the fact that we go to great lengths to offend everyone equally. This is not a hate crime! At our house we call it “pickin” and it is symbolic of your acceptance in the group. We live in the United States Of The Offended, so get over it!!

As a joke, my brother used to hang a pair of panty hose over his fireplace before Christmas. He said all he wanted was for Santa to fill them. What they say about Santa checking the list twice must be true because every Christmas morning, although Jay’s kids’ stockings were overflowed, his poor pantyhose hung sadly empty. One year I decided to make his dream come true. I put on sunglasses and went in search of an inflatable love doll. They don’t sell those things at Wal-Mart. I had to go to an adult bookstore downtown. If you’ve never been in an X-rated store, don’t go. You’ll only confuse yourself. I was there an hour saying things like, “What does this do?” “You’re kidding me!” “Who would buy that?” Fi nally, I made it to the inflatable doll section. I wanted to buy a standard, uncomplicated doll that could also substitute as a passenger in my truck so I could use the carpool lane during rush hour. Finding what I wanted was difficult. “Love Dolls” come in many differ ent models. I settled for “Lovable Louise.” She was at the bottom of the price scale. To call Louise a “doll” took a huge leap of imagination. On Christmas Eve and with the help of an old bicycle pump, Louise came to life. My sister-in-law was in on the plan and let me in during the wee morning hours. Long after Santa had come and gone, I filled the dangling pantyhose with Louise’s pliant legs and bottom. I also ate some cookies and drank what remained of a glass of milk on a nearby tray. I went home and giggled for a couple of hours. The next morning my brother called to say that Santa had been to his house and left a present that had made him VERY happy but had left the dog con fused. She would bark, start to walk away, then come back and bark some more. We all agreed that Louise should remain in her panty hose so the rest of the family could admire her when they came over for the tra ditional Christmas dinner. My grandmother noticed Louise the moment she walked in the door. “What the hell is that?” she asked.

My brother quickly explained, “It’s a doll.” “Who would play with something like that?” Granny snapped. I had several candidates in mind, but kept my mouth shut. “Where are her clothes?” Granny continued. “Boy, that turkey sure smells nice, Gran,” Jay said, to steer her into the dining room. But Granny was relentless. “Why doesn’t she have any teeth?” Again, I could have answered, but why would I? It was Christmas and no one wanted to ride in the back of the ambulance saying, “Hang on Granny, hang on!” My grandfather, a delightful old man with poor eyesight, sidled up to me and said, “Hey, who’s the naked gal by the fireplace?” I told him she was Jay’s friend. A few minutes later I noticed Grandpa by the mantel, talking to Louise. Not just talking, but actually flirt ing. It was then that we realized this might be Grandpa’s last Christmas at home. The dinner went well. We made the usual small talk about who had died, who was dying, and who should be killed, when suddenly Louise made a noise like my father in the bathroom in the morning. Then she lurched from the panty hose, flew around the room twice, and fell in a heap in front of the sofa. The cat screamed. I passed cranberry sauce through my nose, and Grandpa ran across the room, fell to his knees, and began administering mouth-to-mouth resuscitation. My brother fell back over his chair and wet his pants. Granny threw down her napkin, stomped out of the room, and sat in the car. It was indeed a Christmas to treasure and remember. Later in my brother’s garage, we conducted a thorough examination to decide the cause of Louise’s collapse. We discovered that Louise had suffered from a hot ember to the back of her right thigh. Fortunately, thanks to a wonder drug called duct tape, we restored her to perfect health.

Once upon a time in a land far away a beautiful independent self-assured princess happened upon a frog as she sat contemplat ing ecological issues on the shores of an un polluted pond in a verdant meadow near her castle. The frog hopped into the princess” lap and said: “Elegant lady, I was once a hand some prince, until an evil witch cast a spell on me. One kiss from you, however, and I will turn back into the dapper, young prince that I am and then, my sweet, we can marry and set up housekeeping in your castle with my mother, where you can prepare my meals, clean my clothes, bear my children, and for ever feel grateful and happy doing so.” That night, as the princess dined sumptuously on lightly sautéed frog legs seasoned in a white

wine and onion cream sauce, she chuckled to herself: “I don”t fu¢&ing think so!”

A couple was Christmas shopping at the mall on Christmas Eve and the mall was packed. As the wife walked through the mall she was surprised to look up and see her husband was nowhere around. She was quite upset because they had a lot to do. Because she was so worried, she called him on her mobile phone to ask him where he was. In a calm voice, the husband said, “Honey, you remember the jewelry store we went into about 5 years ago where you fell in love with that diamond necklace that we could not afford and I told you that I would get it for you one day?” The wife choked up and started to cry and said, “Yes, I remember that jewelry store.” He said, “Well, I’m in the bar right next to it.

A little boy secretly follows a department store Santa to the changing room. The man comes out in his street clothes, ready to go home. The boy pops out, “I knew it.” Nervously, the man looks around, asking, “Knew what?” Smiling ear to ear, the little boy leans in close and whispers, “I knew that Santa wouldn’t be able to keep an eye on all the little girls and boys without a secret identity.” The man smiles, nodding, “Just make sure not to tell anyone.” The little boy nods enthusiastically, “I won’t, San…” the boy pauses, looking around cau tiously, adding, “I mean Chris Kringle.”

Juan’s little brother Jose was born on the same day that his Elf on the Shelf, Maria, came to his house. After writing his goodbye letter to Maria on Christmas Eve, Juan’s par ents noticed him pushing Jose’s bouncy seat toward the chimney. “What are you doing?” His mom asked. “I just wanted to make sure Santa didn’t forget to take Jose, too.”

It’s a romantic full moon, when Pedro said, “Hey, mamacita, let’s do Weeweechu.” “Oh no, not now, let’s look at the moon!” said Rosita. “Oh, c’mon baby, let’s you and I do Weeweechu. I love you and it’s the perfect time,” Pedro begged. “But I wanna just hold your hand and watch the moon.” replied Rosita. “Please, corazoncito, just once, do Weeweechu with me.” Rosita looked at Pedro and said, “OK, one time, we’ll do Weeweechu.” Pedro grabbed his guitar and they both sang.....”Weeweechu a Merry Christmas, Weeweechu a Merry Christ mas, Weeweechu a Merry Christmas, and a Happy New Year.”