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Table Of Contents Issue 283
Reviving Old Harleys
PAGE 24
Harley Drag Racing On A Budget
PAGE 40
The Legendary Joe Smith’s 81 st Birthday
PAGE 50
Harley-Davidson Reveals New Models
February 2022
Letter From The Editor.....................................................5 Cover Story - All Harley World Shootout / Lumbee Racing....6 Cruisin’ Calendar..............................................................8 Quotable Quote................................................................10 Thunderzone....................................................................11 Elvis’ Birthday Party At Down Home Harley-Davidson.....12 Reviving Old Harleys........................................................14 South Main Customs - Kannapolis, NC’s Old School Bike Shop... 18 Harley Drag Racing On A Budget.....................................24 Carolinas’ Biker Lawyers Bike Feature.............................30 Wreaths Across America..................................................32 Crazy’s New Year’s Day Ride...........................................34 Windjammers 33 rd Annual Toy Run..................................36 The Legendary Joe Smith’s 81 st Birthday........................40 Christian Or Not?..............................................................42 Springer’s Toys For Tots Drive..........................................44 Virtual Bike Show.............................................................46 Ezzy Shine - Product Review...........................................48 Harley-Davidson Reveals Powerful New Grand American Touring, Cruiser & Cvo Motorcycles......50 Gaston Co. CBA Mickey Siegler Polar Bear Run.............54 People & Places...............................................................56 Spokes & Jokes................................................................58
Letter From The Editors Shit! It’s February already? That’s GREAT! That puts us closer to warm weather and rally season which is awesome, cause this below freezing temps and snow can go straight back to hell where it came from! It snowed 3 consecutive weekends in January, and while that is good for finishing bike projects and stayin cozy with your ol lady, it’s NOT good for all the great events we should be to going to! Like I said, we are getting closer to spring and before you know it we will be cruisin’ without leathers, but let’s not sleep on February. There are some great events going on in Feburary, just check out the Cruisin’ Calendar on page 6 of this, the 283rd print issue of The Carolinas’ Full Throttle Magazine. We also have the full list of events on our website, FullThrottleMagazine.com and if that’s not enough, you can sign up for us to email or text them to you each week so you don’t go and miss out on nothin! This month’s cover features Paul Watson of Lumbee Racing. Paul puts on six stellar drag racing events called The All Harley World Shootout and we are fortunate enough to have these events in our back yard. Do yourself a favor check out pages 4 and 5 of this issue and read about The All Harley World Shootout, then pick out a couple dates to attend his events, you won’t regret it! The Carolinas’ Full Throttle Magazine is a proud sponsor of Lumbee Racing and The All Harley World Shootout. Among the great events going on in February is the 23rd Attempt – Almost A Tradition, Pre-Daytona, Valentine’s Day Party and Oyster Roast that we call, The Fear Of February Party! It’s kinda our Reader Appreciation Party and a great way to shake off some of the winter blues by partying your ass off with us. The Fear Of February Party will be on February 12th from 12noon to 6pm. We are bringing the party back to the site of its origin in 1999, Double D’s Burnout Saloon. Bob Karney / Carolinas’ Biker Lawyers and Smokin’ Harley-Davidson have stepped up again this year help us throw a ton of FREE Oysters your way. We will have them steamed or raw, but they are first come, first served. There is also gonna be live music by the Stone Parker Band, minibike games, and other adult games going on during the day, so leave them kids at home. This is a 18 years old and up party! We are raffling off a 70” 4k Ultra High-Definition Smart TV that would look great in your mancave, living room or your bathroom…iffn you got enough room in there. We will also be raffling off a beautiful Diamond Heart Pendant that is sponsored by our friends at Blade Runner Pawn Shop in Winston-Salem. It’s a rain or shine party and as the saying goes, “Sometimes the weather is bad, but the party is ALWAYS great” so I expect to see you all there. Also in this issue are some really great reads. We have everything from the last few toy runs of 2021 to Crazy’s New Year’s Day Ride and even how to get to revivin’ old Harleys! Also check out the interviews we did on Dano Simmons of South Main Customs and the Legendary Joe Smith. You can both read the interview or watch them on our website’s video page! As always we have the BEST biker friendly businesses in the Carolinas in this months magazine. Make sure you take the time to check out the ads for all the deals they are tossin’ out to ya! Our advertisers have kept the Carolinas’ Full Throttle Magazine FREE for you to pick up since 1998. oly
Mark Infield
Founder - Ride In Peace 12/06/1949 - 7/02/2021
Molly “WildThing” Infield Executive Editor / Financial Officer Molly@FullThrottleMagazine.com
Lincoln Infield
Managing Editor / Art Director Lincoln@FullThrottleMagazine.com
Maggie Infield
Production Assistant / Dancing Queen
Deb Printup Graphic Design
Sales Staff Lincoln, Alan, Scott, Christian, Rose, Lloyd, Elwin, Anthony, Gary, Trisha, David, Bill, Len, Pam, Megan, Tracey, John, Rob
Photos Chaos, Alan Dockery, Lincoln Infield, Wally Wersching, Chi, Brad Patton, Rose & Lloyd, Anchor, Bill Gallaway, Rob Harper, John Ridenhour
Writers WildThing, Alan Dockery, Ms. Pat, Lincoln Infield, Wally Wersching, Anchor, Rose & Lloyd, Bill Gallaway, Chi, Rob Harper, John Ridenhour
Thunderzone Thunder www.TheThunderZone.com
The Carolinas’ Full Throttle P.O. Box 2294 Jamestown NC 27282 (336) 885-5400 • Fax (336) 833-6794 Editor@FullThrottleMagazine.com www.FullThrottleMagazine.com
The Carolinas’ Full Throttle Magazine 2022 is published monthly and no reproduction of any content is permitted except by prior express written approval of Molly A. Infield, Publisher, Editor, & CEO. Publisher assumes no financial responsibility for errors in ads beyond the cost of space occupied by error. Publisher is not liable for: any slandering of an individual or group, as we mean no malice or individual criticism at any time. We are not responsible for the opinions or comments of our columnists. The advertisers are solely responsible for content of their ads, promises, and coupons, or any lack of fulfillment thereof. Publisher is also to be held harmless from: failure to produce any issue as scheduled due to reasons beyond control; all suits, claims or loss of expenses; including but is not limited to: suits for libel, plagiarism, copyright infringement, and unauthorized use of a person’s name or photograph. Publisher does not promote excessive consumption of alcoholic beverages.
All Harley World Shootout Dominates east coast drag racing tracks Featuring
The Lumbee Racing Team, The Henry Berry Lowrie Pro Bagger & Fatnasty Friends, family, and fans of Lumbee Racing and the AHWS the cover of this issue is dedicated to my American Indian heritage and the great people of the “Lumbee and Tuscarora Nation” that live in this great country of ours. This is nothing but pride for me right now. We as a people have come a long way to get that much deserved recognition of just being in existence and if you know me personally you already understand that heritage dedication. I am proud of this cover page and I hope you share in that pride as well. I have said this many times but “All Lives Matter” no matter the race, where you came from, or who you are. That is the great thing about Harley-Davidson drag racing it brings together every ethnicity, gender, and age group on that race weekend. Together as many we become ONE just enjoying each other’s company and the greatest sport in America. Harley-Davidson has given the race world the best motor in the history of the corporation with the M8. Millennials are jumping on board with H-D purchases daily and enjoying that Harley lifestyle. Just one big Harley family! We ride Harley’s and we race Harley’s. The All Harley World Shootout events stretch out from April through November and dominates some of the southeasts best drag strips. The All Harley World Shootout is not just a Harley race but a family friendly event built on spectator accommodations. We design our program around our racers and fans. We cater to both to make sure when they leave they are waiting on the next AHWS. We have a lot of vendors, great food, and the best mini bike racing around for our fans which is hosted by the Carolinas’ Full Throttle Magazine. TC and Kasey Steele
own 8 Lug Circus out of Lexington, NC and they are a premiere custom truck building company that specializes in some of the country’s best truck builds. Many of their builds are targeted for SEMA and other prominent shows. This company is well known throughout the Southeast and we are fortunate to have them be a part of the AHWS with their custom Truck, Jeep, and Car shows. Another huge part of our event is BackYard Baggers which is owned by Joey “The Godfather” Hensley out of Winston Salem, NC. Joey builds custom bikes from mild to wild for either show or audio. You think it and he can probably build it. Joey has been with the AHWS 3 years and has put on some of the largest Custom Bike and Audio shows in the Southeast. One bad man no doubt! This year also we will be doing Harley and Hotrods on Friday nights session of TNT. We will have some of the baddest Pro Mods and Streetcars at all of the AHWS events. This year we are partner-
ing with StreetKing Motorsports’ Orlando Williams, Hamma Ville, and Dwayne Gee in May in Georgia. We also will be partnering with Assim Chaudhry owner of Kadafe Entertainment in August in Pennsylvania. Both of these teams are titans in the Harley industry and I look forward to the collaboration. I want to thank the team members of Lumbee Racing: Mad Monkey Branon White, Bryan White of Hoonies Built to Provoke, Brian Peterson, Greg and Angie Hawes of Hawes Racing, Richard and Debbie Stamey of Stamey’s Racing, Paul Uricchio, Ricky and Atoria Chavis of Team Honeybun, Russell and Jackie Smith, Todd Dillon, Keith Rabon and Dusty Blackwell, Dean “Punch” Frank, and Dustin Chandler. Nothing but a huge race family here with this team. Folks “The Henry Berry Lowrie HD” Pro Bagger is dedicated to one of Robeson County’s local heroes Mr. Henry Berry Lowrie. He was born in 1845 and that number is the Pro Baggers race #. He was to our people the Robin Hood of his day. Many great stories of Henry Berry Lowrie and this is just my way of paying homage to one of our well deserved folklore heroes. The Henry Berry Lowrie HD will be racing in the IHDRA’s Pro Comp class. “FatNasty” is just “FatNasty” and just a violent Street Legal, 226 HP, 219 TQ, HD Fatboy. “FatNasty” finished 2nd in the AHDRA World Finals the last two consecutive years in Gainesville, Florida. I would like to thank all of our sponsors for a great 2021 season and we are already looking forward to 2022. Fort Bragg HD of Fayetteville, Bill Rowe and the AHDRA, Simon Motorsports, Dragbike.com, Cycledrag.com, The Carolinas’ Full Throttle Magazine, JT Norton.com, Moto Lenz Mike, BackYard Baggers, Law Tigers, Arnold’s Restaurant, 2nd Shift Cycles, Hoonies Built to Provoke, M3 Motorsports, Cox Double Eagle HD of Pinehurst, Casey’s Tire & Automotive, 8 Lug Circus, Bison Leathers, Pat’s Garage, Scarlette’s Performance, Tilley’s HD of Statesville, EATMYINK.com, Barnett Clutches, Double D’s Burnout Saloon, Smokin HD of Winston Salem, ManCave CustomZ’s, Biker Trash Nation, Impex Auto, StreetKing Motorsports, Kadafe Entertainment, Busted Knuckles of Walnut Cove, Ride and Shine, Detail and Customs of Greensboro, Revolution Performance, CycleWorks of Lumberton, GMS Racing, 240 Bar, Springers Bar, and J & J Family Construction. Harley fans Lumbee Racing will be hosting the Thunder at the Rock again this year June 17/18 at the famous Rockingham Dragway and we will also be at the June Jam Bike Rally June 10/11 at the Rowan County Fairgrounds. Thank you for your support and now get ready for some of the best HD Racing in America at the AHWS.
The 2022 AHWS races are as follows:
Paul with Lumbee Racing
• April 22/23 at Stunnaville’s Fayetteville Motorsports Park, Fayetteville, NC • May 27/28 (Hosted by StreetKing Motorsports) at Silver Dollar Dragway, Reynolds, Georgia • June 24/25 at 710 Dragway, Pembroke, NC • August 12/13 Custom T’s Motorsports Park, Colonial Beach, Virginia • August 26/27 (Hosted by Kadafe Entertainment) at Keystone Raceway, New Alexandria, Pennsylvania • November 4/5 AHWS “World Finals” at Farmington Dragway, Mocksville, NC All race classes will fall under the IHDRA rules for the AHWS events
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Cruisin’ Calendar Cruisin’ Calendar
You can submit your event 24/7
BikerEvents@FullThrottleMagazine.com 336-885-5400
We Reserve The Right To Edit All Submissions FEB 4 FORGOTTEN SONS MC OPEN HOUSE 110 Griffith Plaza Dr., WinstonSalem, NC. 7pm-?, cold beverages avail, games, join the party.
FEB 12 SMOKEY’S VALENTINE’S DAY PARTY 8160 Depot St., Rural Hall, NC. 7pm-?, champagne, chocolate covered strawberries, DJ.
FEB 5 POLAR BEAR RIDE-IN BIKE SHOW Smokin Harley-Davidson, 3441 Myer Lee Dr., Winston-Salem, NC. Reg 11am-2pm, all makes and models welcome, no cost to reg, cash prize. www. smokinharley.com, 336-722-3106
FEB 12 ROMANTIC RIDERS’ CHILI COOK-OFF Cox’s Harley-Davidson, 2795 NC Hwy 134, Asheboro, NC. 11am3pm, $10/to compete, $5/to judge, $1/ extra vote, prizes, complimentary love concoctions. To enter call 336-629-2415
FEB 5 FREE PANCAKE BREAKFAST Fort Bragg Harley-Davidson, 3950 Sycamore Dairy Rd., Fayetteville, NC. 10am-12pm, while supplies last. www. fortbraggharley.com, 910-864-1200
FEB 12 TAILGATE PARTY Fort Bragg Harley-Davidson, 3950 Sycamore Dairy Rd., Fayetteville, NC. 11am-2pm, free chili & beer, while supplies last. www. fortbraggharley.com, 910-864-1200
FEB 9 OUTER BANKS HARLEYDAVIDSON BIKE NIGHT 8739 Caratoke Hwy, Harbinger, NC. 4-7pm, free lite bites, soda & beer, raffles, vendors, live music, test rides. www.outerbankshd. com
FEB 12 15TH ANNUAL CHILI COOK OFF New River Harley-Davidson, 2394 Wilmington Hwy, Jacksonville, NC. 9am-3pm, $5/participate in sampling, $50/chili team fee (meat & toppings provided). Raffles, DJ, food, activities for kids. All proceeds benefit the Semper Fi & Americas Fund. FMI, info@ nrhd.com, www.signupgenius.com/ go/10c0d4babad29a3f9c16-15th
FEB 10 SMOKIN’S LADIES GARAGE NIGHT Smokin Harley-Davidson, 3441 Myer Lee Dr., Winston-Salem, NC. 6-9pm, Hors D’oeuvres, drinks, door prizes, featured speaker. www.smokinharley. com RSVP by 02/09 @ 336-722-3106. FEB 12 THE CAROLINAS’ FULL THROTTLE MAGAZINE 23RD ATTEMPT ALMOST A TRADITION PRE-DAYTONA OYSTER ROAST & VALENTINES DAY PARTY Double D Burnout Saloon, 1408 E. Mountain St., Kernersville, NC. Free Oysters, Event T-Shirts, Raffles, Beer Games, Bike Games & More. 336-8855400 FEB 12 XTREME WINGS N THINGS ADULT PROM PARTY 3441 Myer Lee Dr., Winston-Salem, NC. Live music. 336-293-4983
FEB 12 EAST COOPER ABATE 19TH ANNUAL OYSTER ROAST VFW, Post 10624, 1411 Stuart Engals Blvd., Mt. Pleasant, SC. 1pm, $20/gate, $17.50 in advance, snow date 2/19. Live music, oysters, people’s choice bike show, prizes. Panhead Ron 843-345-3799. FEB 13 SUPER BOWL PARTY Double D Burnout Saloon, 1408 E. Mountain St., Kernersville, NC. Live music. FEB 13 SUPER BOWL PARTY Xtreme Wings N Things, 3441 Myer Lee Dr., Winston-Salem, NC. 336-293-4983
FEB 19 SMOKIN HARLEY-DAVIDSON WINTER OPEN HOUSE 3441 Myer Lee Dr., Winston-Salem, NC. Check out the new 2022 models, seminars, test ride, food, music. www.smokinharley.com, 336-722-3106 FEB 19 BEER & BBQ Fort Bragg Harley-Davidson, 3950 Sycamore Dairy Rd., Fayetteville, NC. 11am-2pm, www. fortbraggharley.com, 910-864-1200 FEB 19 ROLLING THUNDER 20TH ANNUAL “CHILLY” CHILI POKER RUN Lejeune Motorsports, 955 Lejeune Blvd. Jacksonville, NC. Reg 9am, $10/ hand, $15/2 hands same rider, $20/3 hands same rider incl free t-shirt (while supplies last), door prizes, cash prizes, free food/drink, auction. Benefits Veterans POW/MIA issues and SSGT Anthony L Goodwin Memorial Scholarship Fund for Veteran’s Dependent Children. Al 910381-4292 FEB 24 BAYSIDE HARLEY-DAVIDSON BIKE NIGHT 2211 Frederick Blvd., Portsmouth, VA. 5-8pm, free lite bites, soda & beer, raffles, vendors, live music, test rides. www.baysidehd.com FEB 26 CHILI COOK OFF Smokin Harley-Davidson, 3441 Myer Lee Dr., Winston-Salem, NC. 11am-2pm, reg in advance to be a chili team $5/to taste & judge. Cash prize, people’s choice award. Benefits Next Step ministries. www.smokinharley.com, 336-722-3106. FEB 26 DIAMONDBACK AR-15 RIFLE RAFFLE Springers, 405 Rocky Knoll Rd., Greensboro, NC. $20/tickets, $5/ cover charge, live music. Benefits Triad Honor Flight.
FEB 13 SUPER BOWL CHILI COOK OFF Springers, 405 Rocky Knoll Rd., Greensboro, NC. 6pm
The Cruisin’ Calendar Continues On Page 8
Cruisin’ Calendar FEB 26 DOWN HOME HARLEY-DAVIDSON MARDI GRAS 2215 W Hanford Rd., Burlington, NC. 10am-3pm, hot wing eating contest, prizes, DJ, games, drinks, gumbo. FMI, www.downhomeharley.com, 336-227-1261.
MAR 9 OUTER BANKS HARLEYDAVIDSON BIKE NIGHT 8739 Caratoke Hwy, Harbinger, NC. 4-7pm, free lite bites, soda & beer, raffles, vendors, live music, test rides. www.outerbankshd. com
FEB 26 LOVE RIDE FOR CHRIS The Hide-A-Way Tavern, 188 Billy Covington, Rd., Rockingham, NC. Reg 11am, KSU 1pm, FREE ride / accepting donations. Afterparty with Live music, food, auctions. Chris has been diagnosed with pancreatic cancer. Benefits Chris. 910719-4089.
MAR 12 1ST GRILL DATE OF THE YEAR Fort Bragg Harley-Davidson, 3950 Sycamore Dairy Rd., Fayetteville, NC. 11am-2pm, free food & beer. www. fortbraggharley.com, 910-864-1200
FEB 26 MARDI GRAS CELEBRATION Fort Bragg Harley-Davidson, 3950 Sycamore Dairy Rd., Fayetteville, NC. 11am-2pm, free gumbo & cocktails while supplies last. www.fortbraggharley.com, 910-864-1200 FEB 26 9TH ANNUAL SC BIKER HALL OF FAME INDUCTION PARTY Suck Bang Blow, 3393 Hwy 17 Business S., Murrells Inlet, SC. 7pm, dinner, live music, inductions. 843-651-7960. MAR 4 FORGOTTEN SONS MC OPEN HOUSE 110 Griffith Plaza Dr., WinstonSalem, NC. 7pm-?, cold beverages avail, games, join the party. MAR 5 EVILUTION MC 5TH ANNUAL BRAD’S RUN Tobacco Road HarleyDavidson, 1126 S Saunders St., Raleigh, NC. KSU 11:30am, benefits Angels Among Us Duke Cancer Institute. Big Jack 908-403-9671 MAR 5 FREEDOM BIKER CHURCK CHILI COOK OFF Fort Bragg HarleyDavidson, 3950 Sycamore Dairy Rd., Fayetteville, NC. 10am-1pm, www. fortbraggharley.com, 910-864-1200 MAR 5 BOOK RUN FOR BO BARNES ELEMENTARY Barnes & Nobles, 3040 Evans St., Greenville, NC. Reg 10am, KSU 11am, two age appropriate books K-5th per bike. Books will be presented to the school at end of the ride along with lunch. FMI, Barry Wood, bwood@ wilsonnc.org MAR 5 1ST ANNUAL MEMORIAL RIDE Eggs Up Grill, 2246 Hwy 501, Conway, SC. Reg 10am, KSU 12pm, $15/rider, $5/passenger. In memory of Juju, who passed away last year in a motorcycle accident. Benefits the Biker Down Foundation. www.rivertownriders.org
MAR 19 MIKE’S 5TH ANNUAL COWBOY CHILI CHALLENGE Sons Of The South Saloon, 3007 1st Ave NW, Longview, NC. Pots go on 10am, judging by 3pm, cook over open fire, minimum prep. Call 828327-8555 to register. MAR 19 ANNUAL FALLEN MEMORIAL & DEDICATION RIDE Fort Bragg Harley-Davidson, 3950 Sycamore Dairy Rd., Fayetteville, NC. Reg 8:30am, KSU 10:45am, $20/bike, $10/passenger, Memorial service 1pm. 50/50, auction, weapon raffle, food, drinks, corvette club car show. Supports local Veterans. memorialdedication2022.cvma15.net/ Matt “Gunner” Archer, pro.nccvma15.1@ gmail.com, 910-988-0852. MAR 24 BAYSIDE HARLEY-DAVIDSON BIKE NIGHT 2211 Frederick Blvd., Portsmouth, VA. 5-8pm, free lite bites, soda & beer, raffles, vendors, live music, test rides. www.baysidehd.com MAR 26 SPYDER RYDERS SPRING FLING Fort Bragg Harley-Davidson, 3950 Sycamore Dairy Rd., Fayetteville, NC. Reg 9am, KSU 11am, all bikes welcome, proceeds go to the Road Warrior Foundation. , 910-864-1200 MAR 26 4TH ANNUAL BIKE BLESSING Freedom Biker Church-Foothills, 3910 Hwy 11, Pickens, SC. 11am-5pm, Live music, vendors, guided ride, food avail. rain date 04/02. APR 1 UPTOWN LEXINGTON BIKE NIGHT Bull City Ciderworks, 599 S Railroad St., Lexington, NC. 5:30-9pm, live music, food trucks, vendors, benefits Cancer Services of Davidson County. Jack Waters, jackw@bullcityciderworks. com, 336-425-5959
9 APR 2 HELPING US HELP RIDE N RALLY John’s Tavern, 1555 Old Lenoir Rd., Hickory, NC. Ride reg, 9am, after party & rally 12pm. Rain date: 04/09, all bikers welcome. Food, live music, vendors, door prizes, 50/50, games, raffles, camping avail, people’s choice bike show. Ivan west, 704-957-1151 or Homie 828-217-4218. APR 2 SAVING GRACE K9S BENEFIT RIDE AMVETS Post 845, 427 Links St., Rockwell, NC. Reg 9am, KSU 10:30am, $20/riders, $5/passenger, $5/extra hand. 50/50, door prizes, best & worst hand cash prizes, food. Tina, 317-753-2350, tinaww2003@yahoo.com APR 2 FORGED BROTHERHOOD MC ORPHAN RUN Speedway HarleyDavidson, 10049 Weddington Rd Ext., Concord, NC. 11am, $15/single, $20/two up. Proceeds benefit Sacred Selections. Tim 704-607-8434, yogicycleservice@ gmail.com APR 2 RIDE FOR HOPE The Gathering, 6341 Main St., Bailey, NC. (across from the Fire Dept.) Reg 9am, KSU 11am, $10/bike, $5/pass. 50/50, benefits Hope Extended Community Outreach Center & Hope Center Ministries/Recovery Center. APR 2 PONY EXPRESS RIDE Fort Bragg Harley-Davidson, 3950 Sycamore Dairy Rd., Fayetteville, NC. Reg 9am, KSU 10am, free food 11am-2pm. www. fortbraggharley.com, 910-864-1200 APR 9 OFFICER MIA GODWIN RIDE TO REMEMBER Oasis Shriners, 604 Doug Mayes Pl., Charlotte, NC. Reg 8am, KSU 10:30am, escorted ride, $20/ bike. Food avail, ceremony, silent auction. All proceeds go to Officer Mia Godwin’s family. Crystal Ashe 828-358-5640 APR 9 KIDS PATH BIKE & CAR SHOW Lakeview Speed Shop 6330 Davis Moore Rd., Burlington, NC. Reg 8am-1pm, cash, prizes, food, 50/50, raffle, live music. FMI, 336-213-2684, 336-260-1685. APR 9 RARE BREED ANNIVERSARY PARTY Fort Bragg Harley-Davidson, 3950 Sycamore Dairy Rd., Fayetteville, NC.11am-2pm, free food & beer. www. fortbraggharley.com, 910-864-1200
10 APR 13 OUTER BANKS HARLEYDAVIDSON BIKE NIGHT 8739 Caratoke Hwy, Harbinger, NC. 4-7pm, free lite bites, soda & beer, raffles, vendors, live music, test rides. www.outerbankshd. com APR 16 FORT BRAGG HARLEYDAVIDSON EASTER EVENT 3950 Sycamore Dairy Rd., Fayetteville, NC. 11am-1pm, vendors, games, ree food 10am-2pm, egg hunt every hour 11am1pm. www.fortbraggharley.com, 910-8641200 APR 16-24 20TH ANNIVERSARY OUTER BANKS BIKE WEEK Two locations, Outer Banks Harley-Davidson, 8739 Caratoke Hwy, Harbinger, NC. Bayside Harley-Davidson, 2211 Frederick Blvd., Portsmouth, VA. Carolinas’ Full Throttle Magazine Bike Show, Ms Outer Banks Bike Week contest, stunt shows, bikini bike wash, beer, food trucks, guided tours, live music, vendors, contests. www.outerbankshd.com 252-338-8866 APR 19-23 OUTER BANKS BIKE RALLY Vertigo Tattoo, 7594 Shipyard Rd., Manns Harbor, NC. Food, beer, live music, $1,000 poker run, $1,000 bikini contest, old school biker games, dyno machine, 50/50’s, raffles, vendors. Benefits Dare Co. Motorsports Charity Group. Terry Gray, 252-256-1064. APR 21 $1,000.00 POKER RUN Vertigo Tattoo, 7594 Shipyard Rd., Mann’s Harbor, NC. Reg 9am, first bike out 11am, $20/per hand, $10/extra draw. Best & worst hand cash prizes. Benefits children at Christmas. Rain date 04/22. 252-4753541 APR 23 RIDE TO SURVIVE 2ND ANNUAL POKER RUN Kennedy-Hall Post #106, 6250 Hwy 801, Salisbury, NC. KSU 11am, 50/50, best/worst hand, raffles, food. Benefits the Rowan Co Cancer Support Fund. 980-521-5344. APR 23 CAROLINAS’ FULL THROTTLE MAGAZINE OUTER BANKS BIKE WEEK BIKE SHOW Outer Banks Harley-Davidson, 8739 Caratoke Hwy,
Cruisin’ Calendar Harbinger, NC. 12-4pm Free bike show entry. Cash prizes and custom trophies awarded. www.outerbankshd.com 336885-5400 APR 23 SLO MOTIONZ ON THE GRILL Fort Bragg Harley-Davidson, 3950 Sycamore Dairy Rd., Fayetteville, NC. 11am2pm free food, free beer 11am-3pm. www.fortbraggharley.com, 910-864-1200 APR 23 BLUE KNIGHTS OFFICER DOWN RIDE Carolina Coast Harley-Davidson, 6620 Market St., Wilmington, NC. Reg 9am, KSU 11am, $20/rider, $10/passenger. Lunch at noon, 50/50, shotgun raffle. Benefits area Law Enforcement Officers. 910-791-9997 APR 28 BAYSIDE HARLEY-DAVIDSON BIKE NIGHT 2211 Frederick Blvd., Portsmouth, VA. 5-8pm, free lite bites, soda & beer, raffles, vendors, live music, test rides. www.baysidehd.com APR 29 BUG RUN Gaston College, 201 US-321 Dallas, NC. Reg 6:30pm, pre-ride meeting 7:50pm, KSU 8pm. $20/ reg fee, $5/add stickers. Rain or shine, all monies collected will go to the winner & Relay for Life Lincoln/Gaston Co. FMI Anne Willis, carcdetour@gmail.com or 704-609-9953. APR 30 TYLER’S STROKE CHARITY RIDE Riding High Harley-Davidson, 3036 NC Hwy 68, High Point, NC. Reg 10am, KSU 12pm, $20/solo rider, $30/rider with passenger. 50/50, silent auction, food, live music. Tyler is a normal HS student undergoing some unfavorable medical conditions causing him to have several strokes in the past few months. APR 30 SWAGG CITY ON THE GRILL Fort Bragg Harley-Davidson, 3950 Sycamore Dairy Rd., Fayetteville, NC. 11am2pm free food, 11am-3pm free beer. www.fortbraggharley.com, 910-864-1200 APR 30 AMERICAN LEGION POST #25 BENEFIT RUN Historic Courthouse Square, Laurens SC. 11am, donations accepted, music, food, door prizes,
raffles. Proceeds go towards their building fund. 864-871-8551 MAY 1 FREEDOM MEMORIAL WALL DEDICATION & RIDE Smokin HarleyDavidson 3441 Myer Lee Dr. WinstonSalem, NC. 10am gospel music, 10:30 worship service, 11am Memorial Ride, 1:30 Memorial Wall Dedication. Ride $10/bike inc meal. Meal $5, Family of 5 $20. Proceeds to perpetual care of the Memorial Wall. 336-722-3106 MAY 13 UPTOWN LEXINGTON BIKE NIGHT Bull City Ciderworks, 599 S Railroad St., Lexington, NC. 5:30-9pm, live music, food trucks, vendors, benefits Pastors Pantry. Jack Waters, jackw@ bullcityciderworks.com, 336-425-5959 MAY 18 CRUDES 11TH ANNUAL VETERAN RIDE Golden Egg Pancake House, 415 Hwy 17 N, Surfside Beach, SC. Reg 8am, KSU 10am, $15/ bike, $20/ with passenger. Punch card ride, cash prize, raffles, prizes, food, shirts. 843-238-4923 MAY 30 3RD ANNUAL MEMORIAL DAY RIDE TO REMEMBER Thompson Park, 1129 East 3rd St., Charlotte, NC Reg 8am, KSU 9am, free ride, donations accepted. Patches/pins, food, t-shirts. Ride includes 3 wreath presentations. Pre-reg, https://form.jotform. com/21319744445060
Quotable Quote
Cruisin’ Calendar
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The Carolinas’ Full Throttle Magazine
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Elvis’ Birthday Party
At Down Home Harley-Davidson By Scott Wicker here have been a lot of interesting events going on
at Down Home Harley-Davidson recently and on Saturday, January 8th, as usual, they out did themselves again. They held their 2022 birthday celebration for none other than the KING himself, ELVIS! The dealership was overflowing, to say the least, with Elvis fans and well-wishers. The Burlington H.O.G. Chapter had its Famous Grill’n and Chill’n going on and members were volunteering to make sure everything was running smoothly. There were all sorts of giveaways along with some good old fashion fun. Probably one of the big hits of the day was the opportunity to win a new set of heated Harley-Davidson gear. A lot of people lined up to roll dice down a specially constructed table that looked like a small version of a bowling alley. Each dice had one letter on it that spelled HARLEY and if thrown down the lane and hitting the back board with the required letters facing up afterward, someone would win the new heated Harley-Davidson gear. Several had two or three or four letters up but not all six. A roll off was done after everyone had one chance with those that had multiple correct letters facing up. After the roll off, Fred was declared the winner of the Harley heated gear. DJ Todd was on hand playing a lot of great music including our old favorites. Down Home held a blood drive also which they do several times a year. Blood is needed probably more in
the winter months than any other time of the year. There were lots of giveaways and the kids and grownups all had a great time. Specials were offered in every department, and I don’t think anyone left disappointed. The day would not have been complete without having an appearance by the man of the hour, ELVIS!! No, it really wasn’t Elvis himself, but folks, this man was the closest and the best I’ve ever seen. He rolled off several of Elvis’ trademark tunes and had the girls in the front row wanting to get closer to him and have their pictures taken with the KING!!. Hope Down Home has this event again. It was a big hit!! A lot of great events and happenings coming up at Down Home Harley-Davidson. The Carolinas’ Full Throttle Magazine will have all the events listed coming up in the Spring. Don’t miss them! We would like to thank everyone at Down Home Harley-Davidson for their hospitality and for another great event. Thanks to everyone that came out and supported Down Home Harley-Davidson and the Burlington H.O.G. Chapter. Stay Tuned! Remember! Ride Safe in 2022!
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So You Got Papa’s Shovelhead...
REVIVING OLD HARLEYS Now what?
Story and photo by Alan Dockery ’all know I prefer old motorcycles. So it’s common to have a conversation that starts like this. I inherited Papa’s Panhead Dresser, Daddy’s Superglide, Uncle’s Sportster or Mom’s Heritage – and I want to get it back on the road. Some of y’all are buying those old Shovelheads and Ironhead Sportsters since they are cheap antique Harleys. Folks are restoring and chopping them. Having fun with old Harleys. Well, here’s some of what I tell folks about reviving old Harleys. They can be relatively easy to work on. Simple engines and transmissions. There are common parts that swap from Knuckleheads all the way up to the last Shovels. So what The H-D Motor Company doesn’t have many parts for old bikes, wouldn’t you focus on your new products too? I’m a member of the Blue Ridge Chapter of the Antique Motorcycle Club of America and know experts on old Harleys all across this area. So what the dealership doesn’t have the part you want. Do your shopping at the CBA Swap Meet or the AMCA Southern National Meet at Denton Farm Park in October. People say most bike shops won’t work on them either. Well folks, I’m here to tell you them old bikes ain’t all expensive, they ain’t all hard to work on, and there are still mechanics around who ain’t scared to fix your old motorcycle. My go to shop for many years is Vince’s Good as Gold in Statesville, NC. And right now I expect there are some old Harleys getting excellent service at Magic’s Motorsports in Lincolnton, NC. Yeah, Mike is one of those motorcycle mechanics who can fix them all from dirt bikes and little old Hondas to Harleys. So if you can’t wrench, you can still own antique motorcycles. “I can fix just about any old Harley,” said Vince Cason, owner of Vince’s Good As Gold. “That’s what I’ve been doing for more than 45 years. People think they will fall apart riding down the road. They are not going to fall apart going down the road if they are put together right and maintained. Change your oil, keep the chain oiled and adjusted.”
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Old machines were built from the beginning to be rebuildable for years to come. Not many original parts in my Shovel dresser. And they can be upgraded and improved too. If points and condensers scare you, electronic ignition is an easy upgrade. You can even hang fuel injection on them. “Shovelheads are good dependable bikes,” Vince said. “They are easily rebuildable. They must be done right and everything torqued right. The engine can be rebuilt for well under $2,000 according to what you want done. They are easy to hop up. If you want to go fast I can make it go fast too. Fast cost money and reduces longevity. A good rebuild, a mild cam and carb upgrade and a Shovelhead will last you a long time. “ Back to you just got your uncle’s old bike. The first thing you need to do is take a tire pump when you go to haul it out of the dark corner in Papa’s garage. Bikes are hard to push with flat tires. Make sure the brakes ain’t locked up either. When you get it to Vince, he is gonna replace tires, brakes and battery plus rebuild the carburetor. That’s the first steps in getting a bike back on the road. Make it go and stop. No matter how much tread is on old tires, please replace them. I’ve seen good looking tires get real scary real fast as the sides start cracking miles from home. “Carburetors need a complete rebuild. More than just gaskets,” Vince said. “If your carb kit doesn’t include an accelerator pump diaphragm, then get one. If that little piece is cracked the bike won’t run right.” Ethanol contaminated fuel makes a real mess in carbs that have been sitting. Even with clean fuel some tiny passages build up varnish. Vince gets that old carb clean and flowing right. While you are rebuilding the carb, also replace the intake rubbers. Even if they look fine, replace them. It sucks when you get a bike going and they crack and leak once being rattled by the revived motor. Yes, seen that happen. I’ve taken off down the road to ride bikes I was thinking about buying and they have no front brakes. Thankfully, many old bikes have mechanical rear drums. Get the bike home and the hydraulic front brakes have to be completely replaced or rebuilt. Old brake fluid often has attracted water and crystalized to block the lines and passages or badly corroded the metal parts. “I suggest replacing master cylinders,” Vince said. “Haven’t
had good luck rebuilding them. Hone and replace all the parts and still get leaks. You may have to replace brake lines too since they might be blocked. Normally I am able to rebuild calipers. Less moisture and crystallization down there.” Personally, I switch my old bikes to DOT 5 brake fluid. That means a total rebuild to remove any trace of DOT 3 fluid and make sure you have new, tight fitting rubber parts. DOT 5 will not attract moisture. Will not affect paint nor chrome like DOT 3 will. Do not use DOT 5 in a modern bike with certain ABS systems. Gas tanks. Vince prefers to clean and leave alone if it ain’t leaking. Do the nuts and bolts treatment to remove rust and from then on keep the tank full with clean fuel. Use a good inline fuel filter. One of the saddest things when checking out an old bike is … the machine looks great, paint and chrome fine, but inside the gas tank is a red rust forest. Even worse. That forest is covered in white snow. Well actually it is the Kreem or POR15 that was used to seal the gas tank years ago. Old sealers are a mess. But you can deal with them and can save gas tanks that are so rusted out they leak. I saved one with three bad leaks. I remove most of the rust with Evaporust. Clean with acetone. Then seal with Caswell Epoxy. Tape outside where the leaks were. Yes, there are half a dozen different ways to clean, seal and save old gas tanks. Everyone has their favorite. So don’t freak out when Mom’s pretty bike has a rusty and leaky fuel tank. Anywho. For around $1,000 Vince can usually have that old bike you dragged out of a garage back on the road. That’s make it go and stop. New tires and brakes. Battery. Fuel system and check ignition and charging. If the bike has lots of miles or you just want to make things fresh old Harleys can be fairly cheap and easy to rebuild. Yes, the second time I tore into my Shovel Dresser motor it got S&S, Keith Black, Jim’s and Andrews parts. Not a cheap rebuild. Vince is more a traditionalist. “Stock Harley is fine. It will last just about forever. I’ve seen Shovelheads with 100,000 miles and Evos with 200,000,” he said. A common thing I get asked … how much to rebuild this bike or engine? Vince keeps it simple and the costs down. “Generally I can rebuild your older Harley engine for about $2,000. That is new rods and bearings and making sure everything is put back together right. You just want piece of mind that the bike is ready to ride once in a while.” He ain’t finding major problems with old Harley transmissions. They are really tough and don’t need much service. If everything is working fine then check end plays and such and they are good to go. Vince says he can can fix them all. Old Harleys are rebuildable. And just because that bike has been sitting in the back of the garage for decades, doesn’t mean you should let it set any longer. Ride them, don’t hide them. “Don’t wait,” Vince said. “The longer you wait the worse the bike gets.”
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SOUTH MAIN CUSTOMS Kannapolis’ Old School Bike Shop
SCAN THIS QR CODE TO WATCH THE INTERVIEW
By: Lincoln Infield
annapolis,
North Carolina is northwest of Concord and is home to attractions like the NC Music Hall of Fame, a Dale Earnhardt Tribute, and What-A-Burger. Kannapolis is also home to one of the best wrenches in the south, Dano Simmons at South Main Customs. This old school bike shop is everything you want it to be filled with spare parts, builds in progress and knowledgeable mechanics that can get the job done right. They even have the customary shop dog who makes sure everyone knows that someone has just entered the building. Dano traded in turning wrenches on trucks for motorcycles, his real love, in the 1980’s (or as I like to call it the late 1900’s) when he partnered up with a friend that was operating Cyclone Cycles in Landis, NC, just up the road from Kannapolis. It wasn’t long before his partner wanted to move back to the west coast and Dano took over the business. The original bike shop shared a building with a library, no kidding. It took a little while for the librarians to get to know their new neighbors but by the time the bike shop
was looking for new digs, both the bikers and the librarians had become fond of each other. “The thing about it, when we first started the motorcycle shop, the women who worked at the library was scared to death of us. We had some big, kinda ugly guys that would see these women bringing books in and they’d go help them. Before you knew it, these ladies loved us, they’d come ask for help. […] They actually cried when we left.” Dano explained. Cyclone Cycles made a couple more moves and even an ownership change before Dano bought the shop back and landed it at its current location, 1220 S. Main St. Kannapolis, NC, and updated the name to South Main Customs, in December of 2005. When you arrive at South Main Customs, the lot is usually half full of Harley-Davidson Motorcycles of different ages and models, that are either waiting for pick up or waiting on repair. Other riders buzz in and out all day, but make sure you don’t park in Dano’s Wife, Gina’s parking spot. Don’t worry, its well marked. Inside the shop you will find Dano and Gina behind the
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counter telling tails of the road, making parts orders and making sure everyone feels welcome. Dano doesn’t get a lot of wrench time in during regular business hours, so he picked up Mike Pousada to help him keep the work flowing. Mike grew up in a garage, turning wrenches and knows how to keep your scoot in tip top condition. When both the fellas are back in the shop, Mike’s wife, Angel helps Gina with the front desk. Let’s face it, those ladies are the ones who really keep this business going! Dano and Mike are well versed in motorcycle mechanics and can work on anything from Knucklehead Harleys all the way up to the new M8 Harleys and do all types of performance work. “We do all types of performance work. I think our biggest thing is our services, oil change, all three holes. We’ve got a really good price on it, we beat the dealerships by a couple hundred bucks” Dano said. “We use quality materials, we use quality parts no matter what we are building. We use the best of the best on parts because I’m not going to put junk on someones motorcycle pay for it and then have to fix it for free. It just makes no sense. We use the best parts we can buy”. Dano spent a ton of time whipping up on the competition in the Easyrider Rodeo Pulling Trikes circuit and notched over 120 wins. “Now, that’s not 120 rounds, that’s 120 events” Dano boasted.
This experience made him well versed in how to make your scoot to pull. “I learned a lot as far as building motors, baggers especially. We were having to pull 6500 pounds, 200 feet. You don’t use a drag race style motor for doin’ that, it’s gotta be a motor that can get down and grunt and pull. Kinda like what you do when you got your not so skinny babe on the back and your headed uphill pulling a trailer with an Electra Glide. You gotta get down and grunt. So we try to build motors that make torque instead of horsepower”, Dano Explained. As an added bonus, Dano runs the only in house Dyno Tuning Booth around and can dial your bike in to its full potential. South Main Customs has recently gotten its license to become a motorcycle dealer as well, really rounding out the shop. Dano explained, “When we get a bike in, we go from axel to axel and check everything over”, so when your ride out after buying a motorcycle from South Main Customs, they don’t expect you back until you are due for an oil change. I got to sit down with Dano recently and talk about the shop and the age old question: Is it the destination or the ride? To which Dano answered, “It’s always the ride”. Dano went on to say that his favorite ride was up towards Fancy Gap, VA and then find something to eat. Dano explained by saying, “I guess Fancy Gap is my favorite road to just ride up as fast as I can, maybe scrub a footboard here and there. I’m an old guy, but still a thrill seeker”. If you are looking for someone to do some quality work on your Harley-Davidson, weather it’s an antique or modern, stop in and check out Dano, Gina, Mike and Angel at South Main Customs in Kannapolis, NC. They can get your bike running the way you want it or sell you a bike that is! Keep your eye on the Cruisin’ Calendar for Dano’s May Day Play Day Poker Run. The event benefits Spina Bifida research and will land on either first of second weekend in May. Last year’s ride was great and handed out over $1000 in cash prizes.
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Having Lots Of Fun
Harley Drag Racing On A Budget
Story and photos by Alan Dockery here are more than a dozen different classes you
can compete in at some Harley drag races and riders are having fun in all of them. In the 30 some years I have chased Harley drag bikes around the country, there are certain folks who always seem to have a big smile in the staging lanes while they are fixing to go down the strip again. Last Summer, Mitch Dibble, Laurinburg, NC, was one of the new guys having a good time at the drag strip and not spending a lot of money to do it. I met Mitch in August 2020 when he and Kim got married at The Rock. Yes, Saturday night after qualifying Mitch and Kim were married in front of the tower at Rockingham Dragway. Rich Vreeland, top fuel Harley owner/rider, performed the ceremony it was a pretty cool deal for a drag race fan. Well, Mitch told me he was gonna start racing Kim’s Sportster soon, he had a history drag racing cars and wanted to get back on the strip. His regular street bike was not a Harley, but Kim’s Sportster is, and Mitch was ready to make passes in ET Class. There are 15 or so Harley drag racing classes you can compete in from Dial-In ET to Top Fuel. I’ve known the super star nitro fuel racers, but most of my buddies are the folks racing in the street classes and loving it. Dial-In ET is the simplest way to get on the drag strip and start racing. You can run your street bike and be competitive. Dial-In means you make passes to
figure out how quick you normally run. Then you race other folks and the starting light adjust for the difference in your predicted Elapsed Times, ET. I’ve seen several racers over the decades show up at the strip, racing ET Class and smiling all weekend. Watched them move up quick to Index Classes and then heads up gas classes. I’ve seen some of them eventually riding Top Fuel Harleys. I remember when Randall Andras, NHRA Top Fuel Harley Champ, showed up racing his street bike in ET Class. The Fas Coon Ass Cajun still flashes a big smile at the strip. Back to Mitch. Yes, new Wife Kim gave him her bike, a 2018 883 Iron Sportster with only 55 miles on it, to go racing.
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Kim bought the Sportster with only two miles on the bike from a woman who won it in a raffle. That lady didn’t want to ride it. Last Summer, Mitch started making the bike a little more racy, so the speedo was removed. It showed 585 miles earned at an eight or quarter of a mile at a time. “Kim saw me helping Jim Doyle and Preston Bartlett with their Pro Fuel race bikes and how excited I was,” Mitch said. “We hung out in Preston’s pit and Kim and Sue got along well. Sue was Kim’s Maid of Honor and the rest of the ladies with Hawaya Racing helped with the wedding. Made the Racers’ Bouquet.” Wolfpack Racing Mitch’s first race was at 710 Dragway for an All Harley World Shootout race a couple weeks after they got married. Wolfpack Racing was on the strip. “But everybody knows me as the Blue Eyed Wolf. They recognize me on the bike ready to race when I have the visor up and they can see my bright blue eyes,” he said. Next Mitch and Kim went to Numidia Dragway in Pennsylvania for an All Harley Drag Racing Association event. “We put the bike in the back of the pick-up and hauled our gear. Folks called our truck the covered wagon since we stayed in a tent in the bed. A storm came through and tore it up,” Mitch said. But he was racing and having fun. Looking forward to the 2021 season and lots more races, Mitch got knocked down hard early on. A stroke and sickness messed him up for part of the year. But soon as Mitch was cleared by the doctors and was feeling well he got back on the track and got working on making that little Sportster quicker. No matter how tough those little Harleys are, when you start beating on them you find the weak spots. “When I went back to racing I started having clutch problems,” he said. Turned out to be a warped original derby cover affecting set up. New cover and clutches and it’s working fine. I switched to a chain. The original belt broke as I was putting the bike away after a race.” “Then we got serious about tuning it. The bike kept going into back up mode and slowing down. Removed the O2 exhaust sensors and then it let us really tune. We were making it run much better, but still a 14 – 15 second bike. I went to Commerce Georgia for the AHDRA race at the beginning of the year and it ran 13 seconds,” Mitch said. His first pass on the bike was just barely over 15 seconds, but with a few tweaks it ran down in the 13’s. By the end of 2021 Mitch ran an 11.99 on that little Sportster. With minimum mods. Mitch was quickly doing well and going to semi-final and final rounds. He has always been great on the starting line.
Cuts good lights. It’s critical in Dial-In ET racing that you leave the line on time. The better your initial reaction time is, the more time you have to work with getting down the strip as close to your Dial-In as possible. Getting out there and racing on a tight budget worked well for Mitch in 2021. He gets help from lots of the other racers, especially Branon White and Paul Watson. They run the All Harley World Shootout series. “He’s having the time of his life and that’s all that matters to me,” Kim said. “He’s happy and living his dream. I can’t watch him race because I get nervous. I love the racing family and we have made lots of good friends at the track.” The Crash Then Mitch crashed. 2021 racing season was done. “I had a crash at Gainesville end of the season last year,” Mitch said. “Sixty feet from the finish line the back of the bike got loose and started going out from underneath me. Leaned to the right and I got control. Then it leaned to the left and kicked out again. My bike has an auto-tilt shut-off. it shut the bike off. Once it shut the bike off, I knew I couldn’t pull it back out. All I did then was let it go. I was doing about 110 when I came off the bike. Was making a fast record pass and got the win light. But you have to stay on the bike to win. My leathers were done. Finished. They did their job. I got some road rash.” Mitch got several races on the bike, more than 500 miles, racing for a lot less than folks can spend to drag race. But y’all know how men are about some things. Such as …. making a race bike go quicker. The details ain’t being released yet, but he just has to hop up the little Harley. The motor will be much bigger. The bike gets lightened more. I expect a slightly longer swingarm. Maybe some new paint. But I know
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the pretty green gas tank stays. “I’m keeping the gas tank because the bike has a special paint job. One-off custom paint from Harley since the bike was built for a charity raffle. Beautiful green with gold and silver heavy metallic,” Mitch said. “The bike is special to me and I will do everything I can to keep it out there and keep it competitive. This bike was given to me by my wife to enjoy and do what my childhood dream was, drag race. That’s why that tank won’t go anywhere,” he said One thing I appreciate Mitch saying these days is, “Wear good gear when drag racing.” I cringe when I see y’all at the starting line with minimum leathers; gloves and shoes that might look cool sitting on your bike at the bar but ain’t gonna protect your hide sliding down the track. “I took my spill in Gainesville and got some road rash through the leathers. I say to those guys who race in jeans and everything, at least wear cheap leathers and good boots. I had on cheap leathers. Cost me a hundred bucks. Went through the leathers and ruined them. But they saved my skin. I got rashed. At least go on-line and buy some cheap leathers if you are gonna race,” Mitch said. “In Pennsylvania, soon after launching the bike it shot to the right. Real hard. You know me. I don’t get out of it. I stayed in it and rode it out. Well I rubbed the wall. My boot rubbed the wall hard enough it removed some off the boot. If I had on those thin racing shoes, I would have been hurt. But I had on my steel-toe, steel-shank work boots. Just for hoo ha’s because Susan Bartlett got on me about wearing my heavy boots. After that happened I bought good boots to race in,” he said. “The one’s I want to thank are first and foremost the love of my life Kim Dibble for giving up her Harley 883 Iron so I could go live a life long dream I had since I was a teenager,” Mitch said. “Thanks to Paul Watson for introducing me to a bunch of people who became friends and family. Paul introduced me to Branon White with Mad Monkey who basically took me under his wing and taught me 99% about Harley-Davidson drag racing. He’s taught me more than I can say. Also, Travis Groff who helped me from the beginning. Branon and Travis got me in touch with Chad Hart with XLXB Horsepower who has helped me and now is putting together something for me.” “None of what I’m doing would ever be possible without Kim supporting me completely. Even when she makes the races for some reason she doesn’t come watch, she thinks it’s bad luck, says I get nervous when she watches me. I don’t. I wish she would more, but with her lupus she couldn’t really go all over the track until I got her the jeep. She loves it. So hopefully this year I can finally make a full year of racing,” he said. I know lots of folks will look forward to seeing Mitch and Kim at the drag strip this year. If you want to make fast passes down the strip, stop by Wolfpack Racing and I bet Mitch will give you a few tips.
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Wreaths Across America
Springer’s Bar Helps Continue The Tradition
by
Lloyd and Rose
For Wreaths Across America is remembering our fallen U.S. veterans, honor those who serve and teach the children the value of freedom. In 1992 founder of Wreaths Across America, Morrill Worchester and his wife Karen, realized they had a surplus of wreaths after the holidays. They realized they had an opportunity to honor their country’s veterans and along with the Maine Senator, Olympia Snow, arrangements were made and the wreaths were put in an older area of the Arlington Cemetery. It began a tradition with the local American Legion, and VFW Post. In 2021 Jeff Schmid and The American Military family with The Patriot guards carried the legacy on in Greensboro. On Dec. 18th, 2021 approximately 35 bikes met at Springer’s Bar at 9:00am and rode to the Forest Lawn Cemetery in Greensboro to meet the Patriot Guards. A ceremony began at 10am with Lt. Col Jim Schmid giving the invocation and prayer. Everyone was welcomed by Mike Lapeirre, the presentation of colors and Pledge of Allegiance was performed by Caldwell Academy Singers, The Nation Anthem was sang he purpose
by Mrs. Allison Twigg. The guest speaker was Mrs. Sharon Denny, she is the daughter of late J.T. Doss, who served in Pacific Theatre of WWII, and was a prisoner of war. The wreaths were donated by different. Groups. Springers and The American Military Family were both in the Silver Group. Many were involved and a huge thank you goes out to each for remembering, honoring and teaching. Next year’s presentation will be on December 18, 2022, save the date and join the tradition.
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Crazy’s
New Year’s Day
Ride
By Lincoln Infield
eah,
2021 had a lot of ups and downs. In fact the last two years kinda blend together into a shitty cocktail of the molotov type. But no matter what type of year it had been, you wanna start the new year off in a positive direction by going on a ride with some friends. I mean at that point, you haven’t ridden with them since last year! The last 14 years Crazy’s New Year’s Day Ride has been were friends gathered to ring in the new year with a bar crawl ride and canned good drive. Seventy degree temps made this New Years Day ride a no brainer and I made it out the door in a short sleeve shirt. The ride starts at Baggerz Saloon in Winston-Salem at 12:30pm. Faron “Crazy” Newsome makes sure everyone who had a wild night on New Year’s Eve gets a few minutes of shut eye before we throw the kickstands up. Well over 100 bikes piled in this year bringing in over 500lbs of food for the needy and some cash to boot. It was a rolling party as the ride went through some of Winston-Salem hot spots including Second & Green, Pine Tree Tavern, Scotty B’s before ending at the Ole Watering Hole in Wallburg, NC.
It was a great day to gather with riding buddies and get some miles in. Congrats to Crazy for putting on another great ride to help the local food Bank. After partying at the Hole for a while the riders slowly cleared out and I did about the same. I got home about 10 minutes before the bottom dropped out at my house. Already, 2022 is looking good!
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The Carolinas’ F33 ull rd Throttle Magazine Windjammers Annual Toy Run
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By Wally Wersching
very year, the
Christmas season around Shelby, NC starts with Murphey’s Toy Run on the Saturday before Thanksgiving and ends with the Windjammers’ Toy Run on the Saturday before Christmas. This year was no different. There were at least two toy runs every weekend. I went to every Toy Run I could during November and December. All had sunny skies and cold temperatures. All except for the Windjammers which was warm but rainy. During the week before the run, it was beautiful and sunny with temps in the 60’s and 70’s. We were all hoping that it would continue into Saturday, but it didn’t. I have been to every one of the Windjammers’ Toy Runs since 1989, and this was the first one I remember being rained on. The rain started Friday night and didn’t end until Sunday morning. The toy run went on rain or shine so on Saturday, December 18th, the Windjammers Motorcycle Club held their 33rd Annual Toy Run for the Cleveland County Children’s Homes. As always, there was a real air of anticipation. Everyone in the area looks forward to the Windjammers Toy Run. It’s a time to meet old friends, and to make new ones too. The Windjammer’s Toy Run is normally an all-day event. It starts at 7:30AM with breakfast at the clubhouse on Nalley Drive in Shelby with lots of hot coffee, donuts, homemade sausage, livermush, and biscuits. From there, it goes to the “Gathering Place”, the Cleveland Mall parking lot in Shelby. At 1:00PM, the parade with police escort goes through town, and then usually to one of the Cleveland County Children’s Homes, Aaron’s House, west of Shelby. This year, because of the pandemic, and the weather (some
of the roads had standing water), the parade rode directly to the Windjammers club house for the rest of the festivities that included free BBQ and fixin’s. Then they drew the winning numbers for the Harley motorcycle 1st prize, and cash for 2nd, and 3rd. John Brown was the lucky winner of the 2001 Harley-Davidson Road King this year, congrats! The proceeds from the raffle go to the Children’s Home too. The old military truck sponsored by the local US Marine Corps group was usually the place to drop off the toys, but this year, the club rented a U-Haul truck to carry all the toys. I arrived at the mall parking lot about noon. I was happy to see that there were already a few bikes parked there. I walked toward the t-shirt table with as stack of Carolinas’ Full Throttle magazines but by the time I got to the table, I only had one left. People stopped me on the way asking for their magazines. I noticed that The Karney Law Firm was there with its van. There were a couple young ladies giving away calendars, and other stuff. As time passed, the large parking lot slowly filled with bikes. It’s always a lot of fun. Many old friends were there shaking hands and hugging each other in friendly greetings. I saw some old friends that I only see during Toy Runs like Carolyn. She was one of my students when I was a Ridercoach a few lifetimes ago. I also bumped into another friend, Joe, who I met in Marion at a charity event. He lives in Forest City. He rode in on his Honda Valkyrie. There were many clubs, and Biker Ministries represented at the run. All brought toys strapped to their bikes. Some had their bikes decorated in the Christmas spirit. Santa was there making it exciting for the young ones. The rain didn’t dampen any of their spirits.
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A little before 1:00, the president of the Windjammers, Curly, called everybody together to talk about the route and have a prayer. At exactly 1:00PM, the command to fire-‘emup went out, and the parade started heading toward the Court Square in Shelby with a police escort. The Windjammers club members led the run followed by the members of the CCIB. Once it starts, there are motorcycles as far as the eye can see, and the roar is almost deafening as they pass. Next year’s toy run starts the day after this year’s run. The club members work all year getting pledges and donations so that the next year’s Toy Run will be the best ever. Ever since the 1992 Toy Run, the Windjammers Toy Runs have given over a half a million dollars to the Children’s Homes of Cleveland County. This yeas event raised $10,300. The money has been used to give the children a more normal life. This year’s run was a relatively small one with an estimated 50 bikes. There have been years with close to 1,000 bikes when the weather was warm and sunny. We all pray for good weather each year. I plan on going to all the future ones too. I’ll be back again next year no matter what the weather.
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SCAN THIS QR CODE The Legendary Joe Smith’s The Carolinas’ Full Throttle Magazine TO WATCH THE INTERVIEW 81 st Birthday
By Lincoln Infield oe Smith has been around. He’s logged more miles and has seen more of the country on two wheels than most of us will ever dream of seeing. The proof of these facts present in his white hair, his signature written on bathroom walls across the country and in the stories he tells. Joe is one of those guys that stands out in the crowd and well, usually draws a crowd too. Over the years, I’ve never seen Joe without a black brimmed hat of some sort, a smile on his face and Busch Light close by. He’s become a legend in these parts, and probably elsewhere, too. Joe turned 81 recently and two of his local Winston-Salem, NC watering holes threw him birthday parties. The back-toback shindigs both drew big crowds to wish the Legend a happy birthday. Amanda and Angie at Willie’s Honky Tonk kicked off the weekend with a Friday night bash, Art and Lori from Pine Tree Tavern provided the encore on Saturday. I
wasn’t able to make the Friday night event but was told by reliable sources that a crowd piled in and stayed late to help Joe celebrate. There was plenty of suds, jokes, and even a birthday cake decorated with Joe’s mug on it! The event was rockin’ and the rumor is that it went late in the night in true Willie’s fashion. Saturday’s encore was no different. It was only 27 degrees when I rode into Pine Tree Tavern in but there was a hardy crowd there. There was a banquet tent set up outside the bar to accommodate the large crowd. There was free chow, a 3-tier cake and a display with photos of Joe from over the years. Joe was there, with his black hat, smile and Busch Light being a gracious host to all the friends who showed out. There were official Joe Smith birthday shirts for sale and Joe spent most of his time signing t-shirts, breasts and posing for photos. Later on Joe told me he had a great time, but it was a lot of work! The party went all day and into the evening with live music, plenty of spirits and I’m sure there were a few tales of the road shared.
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The next week I was able to sit down with Joe at Willie’s Honky Tonk and chat with him about some of the motorcycles he’s owned and his extensive riding history. Joe, like always, had some stories of how it used to be as he recounted stories of his first time riding Beartooth Highway, visiting Devils Tower and even talked about some of his early motorcycles. Scan this QR code with your smartphone camera to watch the video or check out our video page on our website www. fullthrottlemagazine.com Big thanks to Amanda and Angies at Willie’s along with Art and Lori at Pine Tree Tavern for taking such good care of their friend, the Legendary Joe Smith. I certainly look forward to running into Joe either in the wind or at either of these fine Winston-Salem establishments. Until then, Happy Birthday Joe.
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Christian Or Not? f you’re a
Christian do you worship God or your patch? Do you go to church and when it’s over with say, “well, I have done my duty for the week”? If so, boy are you wrong. You’re not supposed to go and set in a building, and then when it’s over think that’s all there is to it. You ARE the church! Get out and tell people about Jesus! If you want to be in a biker ministry, then you need to do what God called you to do. If you want to be a Christian biker than get out and go to where the bikers are, not only at events and Harley shops, but also when you go to the grocery stores or Walmart tell people about Jesus. Don’t just stutter around wearing a patch put it to good use. Jesus is looking for someone that loves Him and will be obedient to Him, by doing His work. Just remember as you put on that patch, it’s not any better than any other patch. The patch is only as good as the way it’s handled. Don’t say, “well I do more than such and such”, it’s not your place to worry about them, you do your part and God will take care of them. Just ask the Lord to help you focus on what you’re supposed to do, and do it. We all have a purpose in what we do each day. People need to see Jesus in us, so walk the walk and talk the talk. If you’re not sure what you’re supposed to do, pray and
just ask God, then be still and listen . If He tells you to go out somewhere to speak, go, He’ll give you the words to say. Exodus 18: 20 And you shall teach them the Statutes and the laws, and show them the way in which they must walk and work they must do. Isaiah 40: 31 But they that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles, they shall run and not be weary, and they shall walk and not faint.
In His Wind, Ms. Pat
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The Carolinas’ Full Throttle Magazine Springer’s Toys For Tots Drive
By Lloyd and Rose
Jeff Schmid opened Springers in the spring of 2020 he was already well known for his work with Patriot Guards, Elks Lodge 602, Moose Lodge, and other organizations hen
that work to help Veterans in need. All his customers that knew him and have come to know him know his two biggest passions are Toy for Tots and Triad Honor Flight. In the beginning of 2021 a generous anonymous gift was given to start of Toys for Tots and soon other customers started bringing in toys and making donations. Melissa Bently and JC Thompson and The American Military Family made donations as well. There was no ride or flyers the people just responded. Like Neil Coldron and Brittany Barr who picked up 16 bikes. The week before The Marines from Toys for Tots were to pick up the toys Jeff and “Boss Lady” Heather Moran, head Bartender both went out and spent $250.each night for Toys. The tally ended up at 29 bikes, 25 helmets, and 4 boxes of toys. Tuesday Dec. 14th Gunny Sgt. Nate Carpenter and Corporal Lee Kim pull up in a van to get the toys, quickly realizing it was going to take two trips. The toys were packed in and off they went, soon to return with Elliott Shaffer, Program Coordinator. Everyone felt good in their hearts loading up the toys and knowing a lot had
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gone into to helping a child smile Christmas Morning. A Hugh thank you to all that participated and donated. This has been a hard year for many families, but in total The Springer family has raised over $100,000. for charities. Amazing accomplishment, it is what bikers do. The Carolinas Full Throttle Magazine will be here all year giving you information of charities and reporting on how the biker family continues to give of their hearts. From all of us God bless you all in the New Year.
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Virtual Bike show
This Month’s Winner Is...
Clint Christy With This 2012 Victory Cross Country
2nd Place
3 Rd Place
Randall Shaffer’s 1941 H-D Knucklehead
Allen Boone’s 60’s panhead
Submit Your bike
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The Carolinas’ Full Throttle Magazine
Ezzy Shine
Product Review By: Lincoln Infield
ride my bike hard, put it away wet and hate cleaning it.
But that doesn’t mean I don’t like it to look nice, I just don’t like to clean it. I am always looking for an easier way to make my bike shine without sacrificing my riding time. I ran into my buddy Greg Hord at an event and he told me I just had to try Ezzy Shine. He said, you’ve tried the rest, now try the best! He’d been using it for 20+ years and swore by it. In fact, he was the new independent distributor in North Carolina. So why not, right? I stopped by South Main Customs in Kannapolis, NC cause they carry Ezzy Shine and got a convenient saddlebag sized spray bottle for $5. So far, I like it. I can definitely do $5! Like I said, I ride my bike hard and put it away wet so, this cleaner better be up to the task. Ezzy Shine is a spray polish treatment especially formulated to clean, polish, seal and protect paint, glass and chrome. After you spray Ezzy Shine surface of your bike (or whatever vehicle needs cleaning) snag a clean, soft cloth and get to polishing! This product goes on easy, and polishes easy. I found that it removed the dust and road grime from my bike quickly and left it shinin’, No wonder they call it Ezzy Shine! Honestly, in much less than a minute I had a shine on my paint I hadn’t seen in a while. Ezzy Shine leaves a protective coating which beads water & helps repel dust and dirt, making it where I can continue to do less cleaning, but my bike looks a heck of a lot better than it did before. I didn’t even use much of the product, so I threw the cap back on the bottle and dropped it into my saddle bag in case I needed to give it a once over before entering a bike show or parking beside one of my friends dirty bikes. I even used Ezzy Shine on some of my trucks black plastic parts and BAM it rejuvinated then as well! Listen, you NEED Ezzy Shine in your life. So you can either stop by South Main Customs in Kannapolis, NC or give Greg Hord a call at 704-262-7497, he’s the area’s independent dealer and he can get you what you need. Remember next time you look at that dirty bike, you could have used Ezzy Shine and gone out riding, instead of spending your time cleaning! Shop local, shop inside the biker community, buy Ezzy Shine!
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Harley-Davidson Reveals Powerful New Grand American Touring, Cruiser & Cvo Motorcycles
New Models Highlight the Thrilling Performance Of Milwaukee-Eight 117 V-Twin For Immediate Release - MILWAUKEE, WI (January 26, 2022) arley-Davidson adds performance and factorycustom style to its 2022 motorcycle line with the reveal of eight new models, each powered by the Milwaukee-Eight® 117, the most-powerful factory-installed engine offered by Harley-Davidson. New models include the Street Glide® ST and Road Glide® ST in the Grand American Touring line, the more powerful Low Rider® S, and the new Low Rider ST® Cruiser models, and four super-premium models from Harley-Davidson® Custom Vehicle Operations™ (CVO™).
“As part of our focus on stronghold segments, including Grand American Touring and Cruisier, the 2022 product line is designed for power and performance. Each of these new models feature the unrivalled power of the Milwaukee-Eight 117, for those riders who want nothing but the biggest and the best, building on our position as the most desirable motorcycle brand in the world,” said Jochen Zeitz, Chairman, President and CEO, Harley-Davidson. Street Glide ST & Road Glide ST Harley-Davidson elevates bagger performance and brings the purposeful style of the championship winning MotoAmerica King of the Baggers race bikes to the street with the introduction of the Street Glide® ST and Road Glide® ST models. These hot rod baggers combine the V-Twin muscle of the Milwaukee-Eight 117 powertrain with new dark and bronze finishes. For riders who want to strafe corners in comfort, the STs feature the complete suite of Harley-Davidson Grand American Touring features including Reflex™ linked Brembo® brakes with ABS, Boom!™ Box GTS infotainment system with color touch screen and navigation, cruise control and Daymaker® LED headlamps. The Street Glide ST features the iconic Harley-Davidson batwing fairing, while the Road Glide ST rolls with an aerodynamic framemounted sharknose fairing with dual headlamps.
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Low Rider S and Low Rider ST Models The Low Rider S and new Low Rider ST models offer the taut handling performance of the Harley-Davidson® Softail® chassis and the V-Twin muscle of a Milwaukee-Eight® 117 powertrain. “Our customers truly inspire us and the Low Rider ST was born from seeing the incredible builds at motorcycle shows around the world,” said Brad Richards, Harley-Davidson Vice President of Design. “We took the iconic Motor Company design from the Eighties and gave it a new identity with a modern echo. Add the Milwaukee-Eight 117 engine, a taller suspension and raised saddlebags and the Low Rider ST delivers both a dynamic visual package as well as a dramatic performance punch.” The Low Rider S model is a performance cruiser kingpin designed for the rider seeking unapologetic power. The new Low Rider ST model offers the versatility of hard bags and a new frame-mounted fairing, plus an available Harley-Davidson Audio system powered by Rockford Fosgate. Harley-Davidson Custom Vehicle Operations (CVO) Premium limited-production factory custom models from Harley-Davidson® Custom Vehicle Operations™ (CVO™) offer the most-discerning rider a very special motorcycle designed to represent the pinnacle of style and design from the world’s most-desirable motorcycle brand. Exclusive and handcrafted paint and designs are executed to a level of intricate quality that is unmatched in the motorcycle and automotive categories. Each is powered by a Milwaukee-Eight 117 powertrain. Other standard features include a premium HarleyDavidson® Audio powered by Rockford Fosgate® system, a Boom!™ Audio 30K Bluetooth® Helmet Headset, and Cornering Rider Safety Enhancements by Harley-Davidson, technology designed to enhance rider confidence during unex-
pected situations or poor road conditions. Each CVO model offers all-new paint options for 2022. • CVO Street Glide Model is a superpremium bagger for the rider who rolls loud and proud. The classic silhouette of the batwing fairing topped with jawdropping paint and finish details, premium audio and the pavement-peeling power of the Milwaukee-Eight 117 engine make this one outrageous bike. • CVO Road Glide Model is designed for the rider who wants to run out front behind its distinctive dual LED headlamps, frame-mounted shark nose fairing and the unrelenting performance of the Milwaukee-Eight 117 powertrain. Powerhouse audio, an exclusive 21-inch front wheel, fabulous custom paint and extraordinary attention to detail complete this very desir-
able bike. • CVO Road Glide Limited Model is loaded with luxury and long-haul comfort, head-turning style and power that always satisfies. Premium audio, heated seats and grips, and the aerodynamic Road Glide model shark nose fairing make this motorcycle the ultimate Harley-Davison Touring machine. • CVO Tri Glide Model is a super-premium trike offering distinctive style, powerful performance and long-haul touring capability plus the added confidence of a third wheel. The CVO Tri Glide is loaded with premium audio, luxurious comfort features and an astounding finish and attention to detail, on a chassis designed from the wheels up as a trike. Cornering Rider Safety Enhancements by Harley-Davidson
Standard on CVO models and an option for all Grand American Touring models, including the Street Glide ST and Road Glide ST models, Cornering Rider Safety Enhancements by Harley-Davidson is a collection of technologies designed to assist the rider in maintaining the rider’s intended path through a curve. This technology package provides the following enhancements: • Cornering Electronically Linked Brakes • Cornering-ABS • Cornering-Traction Control with modes • Drag Torque Slip Control • Vehicle Hold Control • Tire Pressure Monitoring (TPMS) Harley-Davidson stands for the timeless pursuit of adventure and freedom for the soul. Go to H-D.com to learn more about the complete line of 2022 Harley-Davidson motorcycles, gear, accessories and more.
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The Carolinas’ Full Throttle Magazine Gaston County CBA Mickey Siegler Polar Bear Run
By Wally Wersching With Additional Information provided by Gabby Mintz n Saturday January 8th, the Gaston County Concerned Bikers Association (CBA) held their 4th Annual Polar Bear Run to benefit the Gaston County CBA legislative and charitable work. The run is dedicated to the memory of Mickey Seigler who died as the result of a motorcycle accident a few years ago. This year’s Polar Bear Run was aptly named as the days temperature was in the 20’s. The run started at the Country Kitchen in Dallas, NC with the first bike out at 11:00AM. For CBA members, the dice hand cost $15.00 which included a meal ticket for food at the last stop, The Winner’s Circle Bar. For non-members, it cost $20.00 which included a membership in the CBA, along with the meal ticket. T-shirts sales that day benefited St. Jude’s
Hospital. At about 11:00, “Cuzz” told everybody about the ride, and then there was a short prayer. Mickey’s daughter and grandchildren were there with a large picture of Mickey. She wanted a photo of the group before they left, so everybody got together in front of the restaurant. The four stops to roll the dice were the Country Kitchen in Dallas, Metrolina Motorsports in Kings Mtn, Rt 55 Country Store near Clover, SC, and the Winners Circle in Gastonia. The whole run took a couple hours to complete (depending on the time spent at each stop). The riders who stop at Metrolina Motorsports get entered into a $100 raffle. This years lucky winner was Gaston Co, CBA’s Treasures Grandson, Dirk Leibacher. When all the die had been cast and the dice hands tallied Wayne Ammons was the winner and the loser. Wayne had both the best and the worst hand and it earned him $150. Keep your eye on the Carolinas’ Full Throttle Magazine Cruisin’ Calendar for next years Gaston County CBA Mickey Siegler Polar Bear Run and join in on the fun. Hopefully the weather will be a little more hospitable!
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People & Places
People & Places
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58 The Carolinas’ Full Throttle Magazine staff screens hundreds of jokes each month. We make no claim to being politically correct. Most PC jokes just aren’t funny. If you are offended by any of the jokes on this page, take heart in the fact that we go to great lengths to offend everyone equally. This is not a hate crime! At our house we call it “pickin” and it is symbolic of your acceptance in the group. We live in the United States Of The Offended, so get over it!!
A man walks out to the street and catches a taxi just going by. He gets into the taxi, and the cabbie says, ‘Perfect timing. You’re just like Frank.’ Passenger: ‘Who? Cabbie: ‘Frank Fieldsman. He’s a guy who did everything right all the time. Like my coming along when you needed a cab, things happened like that to Frank Fieldsman every single time. Passenger: ‘There are always a few clouds over everybody.’ Cabbie: ‘Not Frank Fieldsman. He was a terrific athlete. He could have won the grand slam at tennis. He could golf with the pros. He sang like an opera baritone and danced like a Broadway star and you should have heard him play the piano. He was an amazing guy.’ Passenger: ‘Sounds like he was something really special.’ Cabbie: ‘There’s more. He had a memory like a computer. He remembered everybody’s birthday. He knew all about wine, which foods to order and which fork to eat them with. He could fix anything. Not like me. I change a fuse, and the whole street blacks out. But Frank Fieldsman, could do everything right.’ Passenger: ‘Wow, some guy then.’ Cabbie: ‘He always knew the quickest way to go in traffic and avoid traffic jams. Not like me, I always seem to get stuck in them. But Frank, he never made a mistake, and he really knew how to treat a woman and make her feel good. He would never answer her back even if she was in the wrong; and his clothing was always immaculate, shoes highly polished too. He was the perfect man! He never made a mistake. No one could ever measure up to Frank Fieldsman.’ Passenger: ‘An amazing fellow. How did you meet him?’ Cabbie: ‘Well, I never actually met Frank. He died and I married his wife.’ An Alabama preacher said to his congregation, “Someone in this congregation has spread a rumor that I belong to the
Spokes & Jokes Ku Klux Klan. This is a horrible lie and one that a Christian community cannot tolerate. I am embarrassed and do not intend to accept this. Now, I want the party who did this to stand and ask forgiveness from God and this Christian Family.” No one moved. The preacher continued, “Do you have the nerve to face me and admit this is a falsehood? Remember, you will be forgiven and in your heart you will feel glory. Now stand and confess your transgression.” Again all was quiet. Then slowly, a drop-dead gorgeous blonde with a body that would stop traffic rose from the third pew. Her head was bowed and her voice quivered as she spoke, “Reverend there has been a terrible misunderstanding. I never said you were a member of the Ku Klux Klan. I simply told a couple of my friends that you were a wizard under the sheets.” The preacher fell to his knees, his wife fainted, and the congregation roared. Seems a guy cruises thru a stop sign and gets pulled over by a local policeman. Guy hands the cop his driver’s license, insurance verification, plus his concealed carry permit. “Okay, Mr. Smith,” the cop says, “I see you have a concealed carry permit. Are you carrying today?” “Yes, I am” “Well then, better tell me what you got.” Smith says, “Well, I got a .357 revolver in my inside coat pocket. There’s a 9mm semi-auto in the glove box. And, I’ve got a .22 magnum derringer in my right boot.” “Okay,” the cop says. “Anything else?” “Yeah, back in the trunk, there’s an AR15 and a shotgun. That’s about it.” “Mr. Smith, are you on your way to or from a gun range?” “Nope.” “Well then, what are you afraid of?” “Not a damn thing.” I went fishing this morning but after a short time I ran out of worms. Then I saw a cottonmouth with a frog in his mouth. Frogs are good bass bait. Knowing the snake couldn’t bite me with the frog in his mouth I grabbed him right behind the head, took the frog, and put it in my bait bucket. Now the dilemma was how to release the snake without getting bit. So, I grabbed my bottle of Jack Daniels and poured a little whiskey in its mouth. His eyes rolled back, he went limp. I released him into the lake without incident and carried on fishing using the frog. A little later, I felt a nudge on my foot. There was
that same snake with two more frogs in his mouth. Ma was in the kitchen fiddling around when she hollers out, “Pa! You need to go out and fix the outhouse!” Pa replies, “There ain’t nuthin’ wrong with the outhouse.” Ma yells back, “Yes there is, now git out there and fix it.” So Pa moseyed out to the outhouse, looks around and yells back, “Ma! There ain’t nuthin wrong with the outhouse!” “Ma replies, “Stick yur head in the hole!” Pa yells back, “I ain’t stickin my head in that hole!” “Ma says, “Ya have to stick yur head in the hole to see what to fix.” So with that, Pa sticks his head in the hole, looks around and yells back, “Ma! There ain’t nuthin wrong with this outhouse!” Ma hollers back, “Now take your head out of the hole!” Pa proceeds to pull his head out of the hole, then starts yelling, “Ma! Help! My beard is stuck in the cracks in the toilet seat!” To which Ma replies, “Hurts, don’t it?!” Two informally dressed ladies happened to start up a conversation during an endless wait in the LAX airport. The first lady was an arrogant California woman married to a wealthy man. The second was a well-mannered elderly woman from the South. When the conversation centered on whether they had any children, the California woman started by saying, “When my first child was born, my husband built a beautiful mansion for me.” The lady from the South commented, “Well, isn’t that precious?” The first woman continued, “When my second child was born, my husband bought me a beautiful Mercedes-Benz.” Again, the lady from the South commented, “Well, isn’t that precious?” The first woman continued boasting, “Then, when my third child was born, my husband bought me this exquisite diamond bracelet. Yet again, the Southern lady commented, “Well, isn’t that precious?” The first woman then asked her companion, “What did your husband buy for you when you had your first child?” “My husband sent me to charm school,” declared the Southern lady. “Charm school?” the first woman cried, “Oh, my God! What on earth for?” The Southern lady responded, “Well for example, instead of saying, “Who gives a shit?” I learned to say, “Well, isn’t that precious”