THE BURMAN
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06 Editor's Note Rechelle-lee Smith
08 #33 Debbie Masala
10 Pride Playlist: L'amour C'est L'amour
The opinions, belief and viewpoints expressed by the various authors and interview participants do not necessarily reflect the opinions, beliefs and viewpoints of Burman University or its official policies or any affiliates. Each author sites his or her own words.
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12 Is this the church? Jasmine Pickett
16 How do they see it? Kira Bruggemann
18 Love is and love isn't Zorisha Peters
Layout Design by Jacqui McCarty
TA K E A look
Editor's Note The first interaction I had with someone belonging to the LGBTQ+ community was in seventh grade. I interacted with her in a friendly enough way, but my voice was among the whisperers who gawked at her open sexuality. At the time, I was still discovering who I was, trying to get a grasp on what it meant to be a female, and how to flirt with boys, and there she was, flirting with girls and boys. Not only that, she was so confident and open with it. She didn’t play the mind games that most kids our age did. She would march up to whoever and say exactly how she felt, with zero fear. I couldn’t wrap my brain around it. In eighth grade, we went on our class trip to Ottawa. To my utter dismay, she was in my room. Whenever it was time to change, most of the other girls in my room would flock to the bathroom and kick me out (I was never all that popular) leaving me to fend for myself. No one wanted her to see our genitalia for fear of her becoming, gasp, attracted to us. So, to protect my delicate virginity, that could be taken with just a look, I changed in the closet. One day, upon discovering that she wasn’t in the room, I decided to change outside of the cramped closet.
06
EDITOR'S NOTE
And suddenly, she walked into our room. I wasn’t quite
pened. I mean, she had seen me, kinda sorta naked,
naked, but I screamed and fell to the floor, grabbing
and hadn’t taken my v-card. Does that mean that the
my clothes to cover my nonexistent womanly curves.
other girls were wrong? Was she just attracted to peo-
She didn’t miss a beat. She put her bags down and
ple of the same sex because she was attracted to them
walked right back out. I lay there, in an awkward, bro-
and not because she was going out of her way to be a
ken looking knot of limbs and clothes, heart pounding,
ravenous, sexual deviant?
wondering if she was going to suddenly be attracted to me. Would my precious purity be tampered with?
Nothing I had known about people belonging to those
Would I now have to fend off her advances? I finished
belonging to the LGBTQ+ community had been cor-
changing, and ran to the bus to meet the rest of my
rect. Over time, I discovered I didn’t know as much
class.
as I thought I knew. In fact, I knew nothing. I made assumptions about a group of people without ever in-
While we were roaming the museum, I felt a hand
teracting with them because I thought that I was mor-
grab me and pull me into a corner. It was her. I took
ally superior and therefore, what they thought about
a deep breath in preparation to scream bloody murder
themselves was irrelevant to me in my skewed opin-
and she put her hand on my mouth.
ion. I had deemed my knowledge to be above theirs, because, obviously they had no idea what it was they
“Shh!” She hissed. This is it, I thought, she is going to do
were doing.
unimaginable things to me right here. “Why do you all run away when it’s time to change?”
On behalf of ignorant people everywhere, I’d like to
She asked. I stood there, stunned.
publically apologize. I truly am sorry about the pain,
“Because we don’t want you to be attracted to us?” I
both emotional and physical, that you as individuals
croaked.
who identify with the LGBTQ+ community have ex-
She laughed so hard she turned red. People were start-
perienced at the hands of those who have deemed you
ing to stare at us. It was my turn to hiss for her to be
unworthy of the love that you deserve. I am sorry that
quiet.
people took it upon themselves to decide whether or
“Honey. I’m attracted to girls even when they have
not your life was valuable. I’m sorry that some of you
clothes on.” She winked.
have to stay in the closet for fear of rejection and I’m
“W-What?” I stammered.
sorry that there are some people in the world who real-
“Just because you’re a girl doesn’t mean that I’m at-
ly can’t handle the vibrancy that you have to share. I’m
tracted to you. I don’t turn into a bigger ball of raging
sorry that I have to be apologizing on behalf of people
hormones than anyone else just because I’m bisexual.
that do not, and may never, realize that they should
Are you attracted to every boy you see?” She crossed
be apologizing.
her arms. “No?”
---
“You don’t know?”
To those of you who are interested, there is a safe group
“I mean no… I’m not.”
for LGBTQ+ at Burman! It is run by the wonderful
“Well. You aren’t really my type anyways.”
Lauren Blabey. You can contact her at (778)-202-0527
And with that she walked away.
or lblabey@gmail.com. Allies are welcome as well!
I stood there, trying to figure out what had just hap-
BY RECHELLE-LEE SMITH
07
One beautiful October day, one of my buddies contacted me to see if I would be interested in going with her to Calgary for a tailgate party, followed by a hockey game. Not having any plans for that particular Saturday, I quickly responded and told her most definitely, I would want to come along. However, I did not know what would lie ahead of me. My friend did not know that she would create me a monster out of me because I learned to love hockey. And also, a particular woman had caught my eye. Once we went inside the ice rink, we found our seats. The team was playing against a team from China. In the beginning, the Calgary team were having a hard time scoring. But their goalie, #33, was doing a pretty good job, I thought. However, towards the end of the game, it had seemed like the goalie became too overconfident, and it had cost her, and her teammates, the game. The team lost by one point, and the fans were devastated. My friend told me that there would be a signing after the game. I wanted to say to the goalie that it was going to be okay, but I did not have the chance to tell her because she did not attend the signing. Once that game was finished, I quickly begged my friend to keep taking me to these games, and thankful-
# 33 08
#33
ly, she agreed. A few weeks later, the second game was upon us. Once again, my friend and I headed to Calgary. While looking at the autograph sheet, I finally got to see who was on the team, including the goalie from the previous game. As luck would have it, #33 would be the goalie for that game as well. And from looking at the roster photo, I thought she was pretty cute, but then again, I could not know for sure, since roster photos were equivalent to yearbook photos. During the intermission, I headed to the cantina to buy me a sandwich.
Once I went back, I took a massive bite out of my sandwich and was observing the area. #33 had taken out her helmet, and for the first time, I saw her without her mask. As cliché as it sounds, it seemed like time had stopped for a second, and everybody else in the room no longer mattered, but her. She was beautiful. And those fuzzy feelings started to come, full force. As I took an un-ladylike a bite of my sandwich, #33 caught my gaze while my mouth was still full of food. I felt my face turn red, so I quickly shifted my head to the other side. Once the game was over, my friend and I went to the autograph area. This time, #33 was there as well. Seizing the opportunity, I headed over to her direction, and I quickly tried to make conversation, while hoping to some god that she would forget what happened earlier. When I tried to talk to her, my voice failed on me, and I remember to use my words. Instead, I started talking to her in gibberish, until I told her, “nice game,” and her reply was just as sad, because all she said was, “Thanks,” and she walked away. My heart dropped, and I was sad. But I knew that there would be more games in
I stopped her. I told her, “Hey listen; I think you are kind
the future anyway. Keep in mind that I had no clue what
of cute, anyway, here’s my number, you should call me,”
her sexual orientation was.
She bloody accepted it, and heck, I was stoked. Once it was said and done, I grabbed my friend’s arm, and quickly
The next game that I was going to was going to be it for
left the pavilion. Then I had realized that I accidently gave
me. It was now or never. I was going to make my move
her my old phone number, so I messaged her. A few days
or die to try. My therapist helped me to build enough
later, she messaged me back, and told me she was straight.
confidence, so that way, I would not repeat the same mis-
take. The night of the game had arrived. I was amped and
be no us. It took me quite some time to get over her. I
ready to go with my new found courage. Once again, after
quickly detached from the rest of the world to handle my
the game, there was an autograph session. I saw her from
pain. Then I blamed myself for falling for a straight girl.
a distance. Her beauty took my breath away. My friend
But then it quickly dawned on me, that she handled it like
coached me on what to say, and what to do. I had put my
a pro, and was extremely nice about it. So while I did not
phone number on a slip of paper and was clutching it,
get what I want, this whole situation made me more ma-
with my life. As she was headed back to the locker room,
ture, and built my self-esteem. And I’ve got #33 to thank.
#33 was straight, so that would mean there would
BY DEBBIE MASALA
09
PRIDE P L AY L I S T :
L'amour C'est L'amour
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P R I D E P L AY L I S T : L ' A M O U R C ' E S T L ' A M O U R
Whether you are an ally to the LGBTQ Community, or just
5. This is Your Life by Switchfoot
looking for some fresh songs, this playlist is for you. It has
When I was first coming out, I played this song over and
been personally curated by yours truly, and each of these
over again. Life is short. You only have this one chance to
songs have a special meaning to me. So sit tight, and turn
live, and that is it. There is no do-over. So why live life filled
your Beats headphones to an appropriate volume, and enjoy.
with regrets?
1. Hey Jesus by Trey Pearson
6. It Gets Better by Todrick Hall
Trey Pearson is a former Christian Contemporary singer
This song has given me life, especially when I was home
who came out of the closet in 2016. This song shows his vul-
for breaks. It reinforced the thought that there is nothing
nerability in coming out, and wondering if Jesus still loves
wrong with me for being me, and to ignore all the hat-
him, after it was all said and done. He sings this song with
ers. It’s powerful song, and the lyrics give power to keep
so much emotion.
on going, especially when one is struggling to accept their identity.
2. Outlaws of Love by Adam Lambert For several years, the LGBTQ people have been oppressed,
7. The Village by Wrabel
simply for being different. In Outlaws of Love, Adam Lam-
This song is about overcoming homophobic remarks and
bert sings about the pain of our community. My favorite
about true acceptance, especially if your family is not very
line from the song is, “They say we'll rot in Hell, but I don't
accepting. It reinforces the notion, that there is nothing
think we will. They've branded us enough outlaws of love.”
wrong with you for being you, but rather with the village who were supposed to love you, no matter what.
3. Love Make the World Go Round by Jennifer Lopes and Lin-Manuel Miranda
8. Secret Love Song Part II by the Little Mix
Lin-Manuel Miranda wrote a famous play called Hamilton.
This song is about forbidden love, especially if you are not
He won an award, and that particular award show was the
able to show your true feelings or too afraid in a hetero-
day after the Pulse Shootings. A part of his speech is played
sexual paced world. You know they are yours, and you are
in the song, while Jennifer sings, and he has a part in the
theirs’s, and you want to tell the world but you cannot. So
song where he is rapping.
you have to live with the fact that you have to keep your romantic endeavors a secret. However, there will be a day,
4. Make It Stop by Rise Against.
when it will no longer be an issue. And I will be waiting
This song was written as a response to an epidemic in 2011,
for that day.
where many LGBTQ teenagers committed suicide, for being bullied. It has great guitar riffs, and the lyrics are just awesome. The greatest line I think in the song is, “And too much blood has flown from the wrist of the children shamed for those they choose to kiss.” It’s a song that ought to remind us to treat everyone with the upmost respect, no matter our sexual orientation or the way we identify.
BY DEBBIE MASALA
11
Is this the church? “Is this where church is going to be?” It looked nice enough, white washed walls with splashes of color. Stained glass windows, sunlight, quiet atmosphere. The people inside it were a different story. “Yes! Welcome!” Sharp eyes looking down at me. Scanning me. Analyzing me. I saw the moment the judgement began. “What is your. . . preference in relationships?” Gaping, shocked, confused, I stared. And stared. And stared. “Why do you need to know? For me to be allowed into the church?” No words were spoken, and I blinked. “I like male or female.” I gritted my teeth together. The wide-open smile had been shut away between two perfectly sealed lips. The smile lines stretched taunt until they disappeared and smoothed away into disgust. Disgust? What had I done to deserve disgust from a stranger I had never met? I was coming to find God, the only sort of light I could hope for because of people like this. “I’m sorry but I need to ask you to leave.” There was not one ounce of sympathy in her voice. Not in her eyes, her face, her body language. “I came here to listen to the word of God. Not to be subjected to the judgment of people who will never understand my life.” If it was possible, her lips drew tighter together. She didn’t blink. “Get. Out.” Barely restrained anger, and disgust, and contempt. I turned around, back down the steps, heart aching and hands shaking. I went to a different church.
12
IS THIS THE CHURCH?
“Is this where the service is going to be?” I was still shaking from my encounter. “Yes, but before you go in, I have to make sure you’re not. . .” He looked around before leaning closer. “Gay.” He whispered, and I stared. I raised my chin in defiance. “I like males or females.” He shrank back. “Oh dear. . . you can’t come in you see the head Pastor will have my head! Surely you understand what it’s like to have someone angry with you for disobeying them?” I knew it all too well. My parents had kicked me out for “disobeying.” My sister had turned her back on me in disgust and anger. My friends were angry with me too. “Of course.” I turned away, and when I was safely locked in my car, I drove to the nearest empty lot, and I broke. I didn’t think that anyone had the right to judge me for my sexuality. I didn’t think that they had the right to call me confused. To tell me I was going through a phase. They don’t. They will never have that right. Not ever. I can only pray. I can only pray that this will stop. That they will learn. This can’t be the church of God. Is this the Church?
BY JASMINE PICKET T
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A DIFFERENT take
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HOW DO THEY SEE IT?
So this is an educational article. Yeah, sorry, but it had to be done. A lot of us like to talk about things without knowing the facts. I know we generally don’t enjoy looking things up ourselves, so I’ve done the work for you. The info is all here so if you’ve ever wondered how other religions view homosexuality, or even our (Seventh Day Adventism) own official stance on it, just look below. There are three main positions a religion can take when it comes to homosexuality: (1) Complete support and acceptance (2) Acceptance but not support (ex. “Love the sinner, hate the sin”), and( 3) Complete forbiddance and condemnation. I would like to stress that this article is strictly for educational purposes. None of the information stated below is my opinion. See below for references. Christianity Let’s start at home. Christianity is a very broad umbrella, and the opinions in Christianity are very broad as well. With so many denominations, how do we all find common ground when it comes to homosexuality? The answer: we don’t. The majority of Christian denominations do not support homosexuality. These would include conservative denominations such as most Catholic, Mormon, Orthodox, Confessional Lutheran, and conservative Evangelical and Baptist churches. However there are many churches that do support homosexuality and condone gay marriage and even ordination. These churches include liberal denominations such as the United Church of Canada, the United Church of Christ, the Episcopal Church, the Presbyterian Church, some evangelical churches, and the churches of Sweden, Germany, Denmark, Iceland, the Netherlands, and Norway. There was even a church started specifically to serve the Christian LGTBQ community (the Metropolitan Community church). As many of you know, the Adventist church is against homosexuality. Here is the official statement on our website: “Seventh-day Adventists believe that sexual intimacy belongs only within the marital relationship of a man and a woman… Sexual acts outside the circle of a heterosexual marriage are forbidden… Seventh-day Adventists are opposed to homosexual practices and relationships.” It also says that “Jesus affirmed the dignity of all human beings and reached out compassionately to persons and families suffering the consequences of sin. He offered caring ministry and words of solace to struggling people.” Notice how it does not say to mock, condemn, or ostracize…
Judaism There are four main sects of Judaism. Out of these four, three accept/support homosexuality. These three sects believe that traditional laws against homosexuality are no longer binding or that they are subject to changes that reflect a new understanding of human sexuality. Islam All major Islamic schools disapprove of and/or disallow homosexuality. In many Islamic countries, it is illegal and the punishment is execution. Hinduism Hinduism is similar to Christianity in that different schools of thought take different opinions. Several Hindu religious laws are against homosexual activity, while some Hindu theories do not condemn gay relations and some “third-gendered” individuals are highly regarded. The acceptance of homosexuality in some Hindu sects is due to the fact that some Hindu gods are not heterosexual. Buddhism Buddhists generally are not opposed to homosexuality as it is not seen as a religious matter. Sexuality in general is frowned upon as it is regarded as an obstacle to enlightenment. In Buddhism, celibacy is celebrated and homosexuality is seen as no better or no worse than heterosexuality. *** What I’ve compiled above is the main/official stances of the religions. It’s important to note that the opinions of individuals who claim these religions may not necessarily have these exact opinions. As the attitude in Western Society has changed, it has prompted the changing of religious viewpoints as well. The information provided in this article barely scratches the surface of this topic. I encourage you to do your own looking to better understand this issue which is becoming such an impacting part of our society. References www.pewforum.org/2012/12/07/religious-groups-official-positions-on-same-sex-marriage en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Homosexuality_and_religion www.adventist.org/en/information/official-statements/statements/ article/go/-/homosexuality/
BY KIRA BRUGGEMANN
17
L OV E I S and
L OV E I S N ' T
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LOVE IS AND LOVE ISN’T
Love has always been the basis for Adventism. God’s
the church is truly to live up to its community name
love for his creation, Jesus’s love for mankind and
we must act on injustice, no matter where it may be,
our respective love for each other. The community in
and be an example of love to those around us.
which the church is built on can only stand in face of trials and challenges when founded on the structure of
It’s important to keep certain things in mind when
love. How then can anyone disown their child or chil-
are a parent currently or planning on being one in
dren for a love they themselves have no control over?
the future. Likely if your child is coming out to you, this isn’t a spontaneous event but an observation they
The treatment of homosexuality within the church has
have made within themselves multiple times over. Re-
always been an issue over the years. The severity de-
sponses such as “you’re too young to know” or “give it
pending on the church’s location, cultural background
time” are ill placed. The child has likely entertained
and the members’ own individual moral basis. Over
these feelings for months, even years. A child revealing
the years I’ve seen the opinions of those of various
this information is often not looking to be invalidated
age groups react to members of the church who have
but to be listened to. That is what they are hoping
either been suspected to or confirmed member of the
for the most, a listening ear. Many parents turn their
LGBT community. There are many who even jokingly
revelation into an attack on them, that their child is
mention the treatment they would enact if their own
doing this to them and that is simply not true. Don’t
child were to be discovered as such. Treatments includ-
be focused on what others may think and remember
ing total abandonment or physical abuse to "correct"
no matter how close a child is to their parents. The
their "behavior". There have been too many children
strength that it takes to admit this in a Christian envi-
left homeless from Christian households to uphold the
ronment is immense and your child is likely terrified
teachings of the bible. Those who aren’t kicked out
to even admit this to you in the first place. The world
are subjected to emotional and even physical abuse.
is always changing, there are identities and labels that
The internet is filled with unfortunate stories of youth
may not have existed during one generation but are
who lost touch with God’s love because of the with-
valid in the current. There is no shame or harm in
drawal of that love from their parents.
doing research when you do not understand.
As Christians we need to do better. Regardless of your
As a person who is still completely closeted to my par-
feelings of the LGBT community, no one should con-
ents. I urge parents and parents to-be to create a space
done the emotional mistreatment or abandonment of
for dialogue and understanding with your children.
their child even as a joke. West Indian churches are
Love isn’t meant to be conditional and no child should
especially guilty of this. Dialogue and safe space for
ever feel unloved for being themselves.
speaking on these topics are important for the raising of any child regardless of sexual orientation. If we do
Psalm 127:3 “ Children are a heritage from the Lord, offspring a
not train the children on how to handle difference,
reward from him.”
the cycle of ignorance and emotional abuse would only continue to be repeated throughout the generations. If
BY ZORISHA PETERS
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