The High Road | Guam's Guide to Elevating Your Life | April 2011

APRIL 2011 — GUAM’S GUIDE TO ELEVATING YOUR LIFE | LIVING | FITNESS | STYLE | TECH | STRONGER MIND + BODY

Page 4 | RIDES: the all-new 2011 MAZDA CX-7

VOL. 2, Issue 5

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Plus +

Easter in Focus

• The ROle of Faith in life • The Meaning of Easter • Make Your Own Basket!

PUBLISHER'S POST The High Road, April 2011, Volume 2 NO. 5

Gift of Faith Helps Us Through Hard Times The devastating 9.0 magnitude earthquake and tsunami which struck Japan are events that the global community must deal with for a very long time.

In addition to providing aid for the victims of the disasterS, there are concerns about radiation leaking from nuclear plants damaged BY the catastropheS.

Whether stress is caused by pondering the state of world affairs, health problems, financial difficulties, or other issues we must contend with, there are a variety of options to deal with them, from the conventional to spiritual.

During this time of unease, many of us rely on our faith in God to face the uncertainties and trials presented before us.

In this issue, we offer two main features: reflections on the celebration of Easter, and our annual stress-busting superguide. While the two topics are clearly distinct from each other, they just as easily can overlap.

Whether stress is caused by pondering on the state of world affairs, health problems, financial difficulties, or other issues we must contend with, there are a variety of options to deal with them, from the conventional to spiritual. For many of us, we rely on our faith to deal with such anxiety and pressure. And as we prepare to celebrate Easter, we are reminded of just how significant our faith is to us.

Faith is a gift from God which helps us to believe all that He

has revealed. It is a present for all, but it is a matter of one accepting it. Faith in my life has helped me to overcome many personal obstacles and it has helped me to accept the things I have no control over.

Though we don't know the reason ...

I believe that whether blessings or challenges rain down my path, they come with a reason and are a part of the Almighty Father’s perfect plan. A greater good, although it may be hard to see at times, will arise from a tragedy.

With this faith, the daily remedy I rely on to deal with stress and the problems I encounter is prayer. Prayer is the raising of one’s mind and heart to the Lord — a look toward Heaven — a cry of recognition and love both in trial and joy.

Prayers in all things Prayers take on different forms such as praises and thanksgiving to God. They can be contrition and sorrow

definition: the high road also high·road n. The most positive, diplomatic, or ethical course.

for our failure to love Him and our neighbors as we should.

Prayers can also be supplications when we ask the Lord to help us and others.

It’s human to be afraid and uncertain – especially with all that is happening in the world and in our own lives today. But if more people accepted the gift of faith, they would be more open to God’s love, guidance, and comfort in their lives.

In closing, thank you for taking The High Road, it has been an honor to produce this issue!

We are extremely privileged to share the innermost thoughts of fellow islanders as they reflect on our meaningful topics.

We remain humbled by your support, and we hope to see you again next month. Until then, may you have a Blessed Easter and find the faith to deal with your stress!

Sincerely,

Publisher Norman Analista Editor & DESIGNER Carlo Cariño Writers Hernalin Analista Leo Babauta Dave Currie, Ph. D. Jill Espiritu Sean Fitzsimmons, M.D. Peter Lombard, M.D. Steve Oshiro MaryAnn Pangelinan Gennette Quan-Simmons Dave Ramsey Frank Whitman Photography Eugene C. Herrera ADVERTISING SALES Greg Esplana Janet Kerrebrock Published by Triple J Creative Services For advertising Inquiries contact: Tel: 648-6081 Fax: 649-3679 ads@highroadmagazine.com THE HIGH ROAD Vol. 2 No. 5 is published 12 times per year (monthly)

by Triple J Creative Services, 157 South Marine Corps Drive Tamuning, Guam 96913; (671) 646-9126.

Copyright 2010 by Triple J Creative Services. All rights reserved. The reporting in THE HIGH ROAD is meant to increase your knowledge in various areas of life and well-being.

Because everyone is different, the ideas expressed and research shared cannot be used to diagnose or treat individual health or other problems.

Seek professional help. The views expressed in this publication are the views of the authors and do not necessarily reflect the views or policies of Triple J Creative Services, its staff, management or its Board of Directors. Triple J Creative Services makes no representation concerning and does not guarantee the source, originality, accuracy, completeness or reliability of any statement, information, data, finding, interpretation, advice, opinion, or view presented.

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TABLE OF CONTENTS

Page 22 Page 36 The Rundown 4 | Rides: The 2011 Mazda CX-7 6 | Relationships: Recovery 8 | Community Pulse 9 | Reflections: Faith 11 | Reflections: The Meaning of Easter 14 | How-to: Craft a Unique Easter Basket 16 | Ask Dave: Money and Relationships 18 | Fitness: Correcting Strength Imbalances 20 | Good Works: Child Protective Services 21 | See Clearly: What are Floaters?

Special Section: Peace of Mind 22 | Coping with Stress 23 | Decompressing After Stressful Times 24 | The Banana Solution 25 | Fathers.com: Work Stress and Family 26 | Bright Ideas: A Mom's Guide to Stress 27 | Smart Money: Finances on the Brain 29 | Office Stretches for the Tense Worker 30 | An Easier Drive: Safety in Focus 32 | Social Studies: Islanders Talk Stress 34 | Dining Out: Shoreline 36 | Style: Eye Fashions 39 | Ask the Bone Doctor: Injuries Explained 40 | Editor's Note: When Tips Aren't Enough

Page 24 On the Cover Donny Borja, 37, relieves his stress by spending quality time with his son and lifting weights.

The Barrigada resident is a barracks supervisor with Chugach.

Also on the cover is the 2011 Acura TSX available now at Triple J Acura beside McDonald’s in Tamuning.

Photography by Robert Tenorio, Expressions Studio.

Rides | April 2011

Doing Family Right | Relationships | April 2011

By Dave Currie Ph. D.

What to do When Your Marriage Hits the Ditch A look at recovery and healing in the aftermath of upheaval It’s true that emotional fenderbenders and marital dints and scrapes are common to most marriages.

These are usually salvageable.

But what if your marriage gets sideswiped, you lose control, and the worst thing imaginable happens?

Your life is sent careening endover-end to a sudden and tragic marital crash?

You lay there, upside down and in shock, looking up from the ditch.

The pain is excruciating regardless of the nature of the impact. Whether it's hearts ripped wide open because of an affair, the very deep, gaping cuts over repeated angry outbursts, or a head on collision with emotional 6 THE HIGH ROAD APRIL 2011

abandonment, dreams are shattered of how things were supposed to be. Everybody hurts and nobody wins.

Trust has been broken. Anger grows. Hope seems lost. A difficult marital crash causes the worlds of many couples to spin out of control with enough centrifugal force to blow their relationships apart permanently.

That’s where people like me come in. I call it marital triage – a type of life-saving crisis counseling for couples that place the 911 calls for help in facing relational emergencies. The calls come every week. Their marital stress has come to a point of interpersonal collision much like the precise moment when two vehicles tragically collide on a freeway.

And another marriage hits the ditch.

As with any serious MVA where police and paramedics rush to the scene to bring the right first aid and life-giving support, a couple’s first steps after a relational mishap need to be right ones, wisely calculated to save the marriage. My goal is to give you the tried and true advice for those times when a marriage hits the ditch – whether yours or a friend’s.

How to Make the Most of Your Last Ditch Effort 1. Stop the Bleeding Your first steps need to be your best ones. By suspending initial reactions, you won’t accidentally make things worse between you.

Enough damage has been done.

know what you are facing as a

It is not the time to lash out and

couple. The tendency is for the

strike back in a wild attempt to

wounded spouse to tell the world

inflict pain and get even. Fac-

of the hurt they are carrying.

ing the truth will come later. Also,

Bad news spreads like a cancer.

limit the number of people who

Don’t cause more harm by care-

Send your questions to Dr. Dave at drdave@doingfamilyright.com or visit his website www.doingfamilyright.com Get Dr. Dave’s daily marriage and family tips by following him on Twitter.com/@doingfmilyright

less reactions that give you both a deeper hole to climb out of.

2. Assess the Damage It is important to face the real issues that exist in your marriage. Get your head out of the sand. Take a moment to look in the mirror. Denial of problems or downplaying concerns only prevents the right recovery steps from being taken. If it is a problem for one of you, it is a problem for both of you. The crisis is to be targeted and not each other. Take responsibility for your part. Face them...together.

3. Call for Help Immediately Seek credible marital support right away. Don’t bleed to death emotionally by delaying getting the help you need. Don’t try to carry your suffering alone. Ask

for referrals of people you trust.

Find the right person to anchor your recovery. Carefully work with them to resolve the issues.

Beyond the likely need for professional counseling, surround yourself with good trusted confidantes who have strong marriages themselves and will be advocates for yours. Agree with your spouse on a small circle of trusted friends who will help you out of the ditch.

4. Rehab is Not Accidental Know the truth about what it takes for recovery and act in keeping with what is right. There has to be a change in direction, an honest look at meeting legitimate needs, and a serious effort to take responsibility for what you can. Recovery is always intentional and is based on commit-

ment, not on how you feel. You have to work through the pain no matter what the problem was that put you in the ditch. Gain new awareness that leads to new patterns with the goal of preventing further accidents as you seek to rekindle the love between you.

isn’t easy. Respect that time heals

5. Remember that Time Heals

recovery. There is no doubt that

Whether your marriage seemed to unravel slowly or through a sudden moment of careless and selfish stupidity, rebuilding will take time — more time than you think. Never doubt whether it will be worth the effort. It always is but you will have to be patient with your self and your spouse.

Restoring trust and credibility is a process. Extending and experiencing forgiveness is a series of many steps. Submitting to accountability and outside coaching

but that recovery is a journey...a long journey but a good one.

6. Trust a Great Physician Marital collisions require significant strength and insight to bring God can and will bring the perspective and the courage you need as a couple to sustain you.

All you need to do is ask Him. When the way is rough, your hope is thin and the worst seems inevitable, He will help you in doing marriage and family right. I have yet to see a marriage that has hit the ditch go to the wreckers when both hearts in the marriage are soft towards God. Braid Him into your recovery. You’ll never regret putting your marriage and family first. ■

Friends and Neighbors | April 2011

Community Pulse If you have a positive photo of community interest, send it to community@highroadmagazine. com and we might include it in a future issue of The High Road.

0 JAPAN RELIEF The Japan Club of Guam Relief Account has been established with Bank of Guam and all of the Bank’s branches are accepting donations going toward the Japan Relief effort. Photo Left to right:Vicky Quenga, Speaker Won Pat’s Office, Courtney Jae Santos, Tamuning Elementary student, Roque Ray Santos, Tamuning Elementary student, Sherlyn Cruz, LBJ Elementary staff and mother of Courtney and Roque, Herbie Perez, Speaker Won Pat’s Office, Eleanor Climaco, Astumbo Elementary. The Bank of Guam is also providing a collection site and coin counting machine to assist with the Guam Legislature’s coin collection effort with local schools in support of the Japan Relief effort.

[ Problem solving: Students from M.U. Lujan Elementary School listen to Ric Mendiola, GCC Automotive Repair Controller, explain how the vehicle lift works in the GCC Automotive Shop. The 45 students from M.U. Lujan toured GCC after their participation in the international Math Kangaroo held at the Mangilao college campus.

[ Cultural awareness: Citibank hosted a mini art exhibit and showcased cultural performances in celebration of Chamoru month. Pictured above are Brian Arciaga, Citibank; Cisco "Hurao" Santos guest weaver, Citibankers Cherry Toledo and Bernie Desoto, Angel R. Sablan, Executive Director, Mayor’s Council of Guam and Sandy Wan, Citibank. Bottom photo: The Kulu Natibu from Agueda Johnston Middle School under the direction of Dr. Benjie Santiago performed a unique repertoire of songs and dances. Boys from l-r: Jerick Tubanar, Jeremiah Cepeda, Bryton Cepeda, Jeremy Wright, Kyle Iglesias, Zericcai Frisas, Agustin Davalos, Citi Country Officer/Country Business Manager, Ezekiel Villagomez, John Mendiola, Vincent Topasna, and Shaun Duenas. Girls from l-r: Jade Denusta, Kaitlyn Roberto, Syvlia Balajadia, Jovin Mazawa, Gabrielle Ulloa, Johnae Jones, Orlean Ignacio, Jaenelle Carlos.

Reflections | April 2011

A meditation on faith

Reflections on the role of the Divine in our lives

By Frank Whitman

In our temporal lives we face numerous daily challenges as we deal with — if not obsess over — material matters. But many on Guam find comfort and strength in their faith in God as people throughout the world have for centuries.

They find that worldly concerns shrink in importance when compared to the spiritual.

“Since my childhood, my parents taught me to make God first in everything I do,” says Edward Cruz, sales manager for Horizon Lines, and a parishioner of St. Francis of Assisi Church in Yona where he is a Eucharistic minister and is active in parish fund raising. “As I serve and continue to be involved with the

perspective and His will for my life.” Sicad is president of Balli Steel and a member of Bayview Church in Maite, where he serves with the men’s Monday night Bible study, outreach ministries, lay counseling, grounds maintenance team and the board of elders.

“I can’t imagine going on this journey of life

“Faith has helped me focus on what is truly important — God, family, friends and people. … I am learning to be more other-centered than selfcentered. I stumble often, but with God’s grace and strength, my hope is that I can be a better person today than I was yesterday [and learn to] surrender my life more fully to Him.” — Joe Sicad church I have found peace, courage, strength and understanding in my life.”

Cruz says that communicating with God regularly helps him to stay connected with Divine will. “I spend time talking and praying to God daily,” he says. “Oftentimes, we are so busy, in a hurry and distracted that we miss God talking to us; we miss His message along the way.”

Joe Sicad says he relies on his faith to “calibrate each day according to God’s word, His

without the hope of eternity and the love of a living God,” Sicad says. “Faith has helped me focus on what is truly important — God, family, friends and people. … I am learning to be more other-centered than self-centered.

I stumble often, but with God’s grace and strength, my hope is that I can be a better person today than I was yesterday [and learn to] surrender my life more fully to Him.” Continued Next Page

Reflections | April 2011

Continued from previous page Going to church on Sunday helps Siska Hutapea “shrug the worldly problems off and gives perspective to life,” she says. “God is in control, no matter what and we do not have to solve all the problems now.”

Hutapea is the managing partner of Captain, Hutapea & Associates and a member of the Lutheran Church of Guam in Anigua.

She was on the church council’s long-range planning committee and was chairwoman of the church’s Tender Shepherd Pre-school until last year when her fifth child was born and she decided to take a break from those commitments.

Interestingly, she and her husband were born and raised Lutherans in Indonesia, the world’s largest Muslim country. Coming from a background in which all Christians are a distinct minority makes her feel a particular closeness to those of other denominations.

“We’re brothers and sisters in Christ,” she says. “We should not be stumbling blocks for each other.”

John Day has attended Bayview Church for 12 years. He says that it can be a struggle to make time for the spiritual during the workweek. “I get swept up in work and events going on in the world; this negatively affects my walk with the Lord and causes me to backslide,” he says. “I do offer daily prayers and thanksgiving. This helps me remember all the blessings that I have received and the need to refocus my attention.”

Day is the president and chief operating officer of Pacific Data Systems. He volunteers for a number of Bayview church projects and helps with Samaritan requests.

Dr. Gregory Miller operates Marianas Chiropractic Clinic and also attends Bayview Church where he helps with grounds maintenance. “Many times during the day I will say a short prayer — mostly for discernment and patience,” he says. “Everyday we engage the fight inside us to do or say what we feel rather than acting in a way that is pleasing to God. I cannot say I have mastered this, but the Holy Spirit reminds me via my conscience that I could have acted better.”

Those that The High Road spoke to say that in addition to life’s daily struggles, their faith also helps them during rough times when life

“I have to remind myself that God is in control. I know that the Lord would like to hear from me all the time; in good times and bad.” — JoHN DAY becomes even more difficult than usual.

Sicad says knowing that God is with us and wants what is best helps him put challenges in their proper perspective. “Life was not meant to be a lonely journey; God wants to be our companion,” he says. “Faith in God has helped me to transcend the struggles of life — the disappointments, the frustrations, the betrayals and the loss of loved ones — to rise above the circumstances and to see life through His eyes. It’s powerful when you can change your perspective and turn something bad into something useful and good for God’s glory.”

Cruz says that knowing that “with God all things are possible has helped me overcome obstacles at work and at home.” That knowledge gives him the ability to approach problems with patience and understanding so that “the rough road will be less difficult to overcome.”

Because of faith in Jesus “I am assured that I will spend eternity in heaven,” says Miller.

“This in turn means that I don’t fear death; it’s simply a passage to a better place.”

That faith gets him through life’s rough spots as he prays for his loved ones, over difficult decisions and others. “Sometimes I’ll even say a quick prayer for the car that cut me off,” he says, but admits that more often his thoughts are less honorable.

“I have to remind myself that God is in control,” says Day. While he remembers to pray for wisdom and strength when confronted with a problem, “I know that the Lord would like to hear from me all the time; in good times and bad.”

In addition to taking the time to pray, Day says he finds it helpful to post Bible verses on the walls of his workspace as reminders. The verse currently posted on his wall is James 1:19-20 — “Know this, my dear brothers, everyone should be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to wrath. For the wrath of a man does not accomplish the righteousness of God.” ■

Q: What does Easter mean to you?

John Day: “Easter is the most special time of the year — a time of remembrance and thanks. Even as a growing Christian it is still hard for me to fully comprehend and appreciate the love and grace that God has shown us through the sacrifice of His Son on the cross and through this, the forgiveness of sin and the promise of everlasting life. Easter is a celebration of God’s promise and demonstration of His love for us, just the way we are. It is the best time of the year to spread the Good News about Jesus Christ.

Siska

Hutapea:

Easter means new life — mostly spiritually.

My family enjoys the Lenten service that we have every Wednesday during Lent. This year we will also read the

entire New Testament during Lent. By doing this, when Easter comes we will really rejoice in its meaning — that Christ lives; He overcame darkness and because He lives, sin is forgiven. In 2003, our second daughter, Grace was hospitalized for 28 days at Guam Memorial Hospital. She came out unscathed and we celebrated her new life on Easter that year with her baptism.

Dr. Gregory Miller: One needs to stop and ponder the meaning of Easter which is the resurrection of Jesus.

He is the only person who has ever defeated death. This is so significant that we base our dates around the life and death of Christ. We cannot be Christians without the resurrection.

As far as Easter is concerned, go ahead and fuss over the party food and preparation, but each day celebrate the resurrection and the wonderful gift of eternal life that comes with it.

Edward Cruz: Easter is very special to me. The Lenten season is a time to renew our mind, body and soul. God has not left us alone. We strengthen our faith by keeping the traditions of Lent; we sacrifice and pray as Jesus did. Easter is a renewal of our faith to strengthen us for the journey ahead.

Joe Sicad:

Easter represents God’s greatest expression of His love to us. He sent his son Jesus to die for us while we were yet sinners. Imagine the depth of that love; while we were torturing, mocking, ridiculing and betraying Him, Jesus endured the pain and suffering of crucifixion to take on the sins of the world. While Jesus’ death was indeed a great sacrifice, it was His resurrection that conquered death once and for all and gave us eternal life. ■

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How-To | April 2011

CRAFT YOUR OWN EASTER BASKET An Easter basket centerpiece fit for your celebration is just a few, simple steps away.

We’ll show you how to create an arrangement with materials you can easily find at your favorite craft store, florist, or backyard.

You will need: • An Easter basket • Easter grass • Feather boa, garland, or another material of your choice • Floristry foam with tray • Green floral tape • Your favorite floral selections • Assorted foliage • Plastic or real colored eggs • Hot glue gun

INstructions:

Step 1: Fill the center of your basket with the grass and the outer edges with the feather boa, secured by a hot glue gun.

Step 2:

Tape your foam onto the tray, start arranging your flowers by height, and then fill in any open gaps with the foliage.

Step 3: Place the floral arrangement in the Eas-

ter basket and then add colored eggs for accents.

That’s it! This is an easy-to-make arrangement that will add color and festivity to any setting this Easter.

Floral arrangement by Jojo Sy-Quimsiam of Diana’s florist.

Photo Credit: Eugene C. Herrera

14 THE HIGH ROAD APRIL 2011

• • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • •

•

76/Circle K Agana Shopping Center: Casa de Essence, Gino’s, Java Junction, SM B&J Video, Anigua Ben Franklin’s Craft Store Champion Sporting Goods, Upper Tumon Coldstone Creamery: Micronesia Mall, GPO Faith Book Store Feathers N Fins FHP Clinic Hava Java, Hagatna Hertz locations Hollywood Theaters, Guam Premier Outlet JB’s Ukele Hut, Hagåtña Kim Chee, Agat Mark’s Sporting Goods MCV Broadband Macheche Location McDonald’s: Hagatna, Tamuning Micronesia Mall Theatres Mobil, Participating locations: Upper Tumon, Apra Heights, Airport, East Hagatna, Fatima, Adelup Opus One in Anigua

• • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • •

Oriental Supermarket, Agat Outback Steakhouse Paradise Fitness Center: Hagåtña, Dededo Payless Supermarkets: Micronesia Mall & Yigo locations PMC Clinic Port of Mocha, Tumon and Micronesia Mall PROA Restaurant Rambies: Micronesia Mall, Hafa Adai Exchange Seaside Fish Mart Seventh-Day Adventist Guam Clinic Shell SHIMBROS/Rhythm & Brews The Piazza, Hagatna Town House Furniture Store Triple J Auto Group Locations Triple J Commercial Tire Center Tropical Living, Hagatna Video Queen, Agat Video Quest, Tamuning

Ask Dave | Finances | April 2011

By Dave Ramsey

BEING SMART ABOUT LOVE AND FINANCES

Should I move in with someone with terrible financial habits?

Dear Dave, I’m fairly responsible with finances, but my girlfriend is in a terrible financial situation with a lot of credit card debt, an expensive car payment, and a big, fancy apartment. Plus, she just quit her job because she didn’t like it anymore. Now, she’s thinking about filing bankruptcy and thinks us moving in together will help solve her problems. If she can’t handle her finances on her own, what’s going to happen if we get together? Can you help?

— Dino Dear DINO, This is someone to keep dating, not marry right now or move in with, and see if she changes her spending habits. You’d have a very tough life being married to this woman, unless she makes some real attitude adjustments where her money is concerned.

16 THE HIGH ROAD APRIL 2011

I can’t say if she’s technically bankrupt, but she definitely needs to move into a cheaper apartment and sell the car for starters. Still, bankruptcy’s not going to solve anything if she’s got a heart problem. By this, I mean if she buys stuff to try and make her happy and lives beyond her means in the process.

Lots of people have the idea that they are what they drive, or they are where they live. Those are heart problems, and that’s the way I was many years ago until I had some sense knocked into me by going broke. Then, I realized I had to stop and make some changes.

This doesn’t mean that she isn’t worthy of your love or she’s a terrible person, but it does mean that the girl has got some growing up to do. Money matters aside, you don’t quit your job without a plan unless you’re being sexually harassed or abused, or there’s some matter of principle at stake.

Leaving one job for another is okay. But the idea of deciding you just don’t like something, and walking away from it when you’ve got a bunch of bills, is just plain irresponsible.

She’s probably not bankrupt, but there are some definite character issues that need to be addressed. Hopefully, you two can work through this together.

— Dave

Dear dave, Can you explain how you view the difference between warranties and other types of insurance?

— Anonymous.

Dear ANONYMOUS, The purpose of insurance is to

transfer risk that you cannot afford to accept. Let’s look at life insurance as an example.

I recommend having about 10 times your annual income wrapped up in a good, level term life insurance policy. If you make $50,000 a year, have a family, and you don’t have $500,000 saved up, then your family cannot afford the risk of you dying and losing that income. In cases like this, you buy insurance to transfer the risk. Now, once you have that kind of money saved up, and especially if you have no debt, you won’t need the insurance policy, because you’re selfinsured.

When it comes to items like warranties on things, I look at it this way: If you can’t afford for the item to break and pay out of your own pocket to have it fixed without it crushing you financially, then you can’t afford that item.

Don’t go out and buy some big, fancy computer if you can’t afford the repair shop bill if it crashes.

You shouldn’t be buying stuff if you’re that broke. Period!

— Dave

Dear dave, I noticed that your Baby Steps list puts saving for retirement before saving for your kid’s college fund. Sending your kids to college would come first on the timeline, so why do you suggest this?

— Jen

Dear JEN, I advise this approach be-

cause everyone is going to retire someday, unless, of course, they happen to die before reaching retirement age. Retiring and eating are necessities. College is a luxury. Lots of people succeed in life without going to college, and thousands have worked their way through college. I worked 40 to 60 hours a week in college, and I still graduated in four years.

Having a college fund set aside by your parents is really nice, if they can afford that kind of thing.

But you can go to school by getting good grades, applying for scholarships, working your tail off, and choosing a school you can afford. I believe in education, but there are lots of ways to get a college degree other than having your parents foot the bill.

The last time I checked, there aren’t any good ways to retire except for getting yourself ready for retirement. I mean, you can always live off Social Insecurity and buy that great cookbook, “72 Ways to Prepare Alpo and Love It,” but I don’t consider that a plan.

In short, college funding is not a necessity. That’s why it follows saving for retirement in the Baby Steps. Should you try to save up for your kid’s college education? Sure, if you can. But there are lots of parents out there who won’t be able to pay a dime toward someone’s college education. And that doesn’t make them bad parents!

— Dave ■

Dave Ramsey is a personal money management expert, popular national radio personality and the author of three New York Times best sellers – The Total Money Makeover, Financial Peace Revisited and More Than Enough. In them, Ramsey exemplifies his life’s work of teaching others how to be financially responsible. For more information visit www.daveramsey.com.

Fitness | April 2011

18 THE HIGH ROAD APRIL 2011

Good Works | April 2011

Protecting the innocent The good works of Guam's Child Protective Services

By Jill Espiritu

Shirley Perez’s daily comic relief comes in the form of her two-year-old foster daughter Antoinette’s antics.

“I was driving with her in the car once and at a stop she said, ‘Mommy look!’ Perez recalls. “I looked back at her in her child seat and she put her foot to her

PEREZ

ear like a phone and said, ‘Hello?

Hello?’ I couldn’t stop laughing she really is a comedian.”

In addition to Antoinette, Perez is the legal guardian of two children and is the foster parent of one other child. Perez has always wanted kids and for over 20 years, she had tried to have children with her then husband.

Unfortunately, even with medical observation and direction, she was unable to have her own children.

20 THE HIGH ROAD APRIL 2011

“I was so depressed during that time,” Perez says. “Whenever I’d see women who were pregnant, I’d always consider them very lucky, as I couldn’t bear my own children.”

Perez’s oldest daughter, Ashley was sent to a foster home by Child Protective Services (CPS) at a young age. Perez was awarded custody and gained legal guardianship. A few years later, CPS contacted Perez and asked if she wanted to be a foster parent for another child. She agreed, and brought home a son, Edward.

“When I took in my oldest and later my son, I thought to myself, if this is the way the Lord is giving me children, I’ll take them,” Perez says.

Perez recalls. “My oldest daughter helped me ease her into the home and even got her involved with dance school. Now she loves to dance and the youngest, also is starting to copy her dance moves.”

MUYCO

Transitions It wasn’t always easy, as Perez had to ease the children into her home and assure them that they were safe, secure, and most of all, loved. Some of Perez’s friends and family were initially skeptical of her taking in another child who may have been abused or neglected, but she quickly integrated them into their lives. She loved the children as her own and also pushed for legal guardianship of her son, which she eventually was awarded. Although she gained legal guardianship of the two children, Perez says that once they reached the age of 12 years, they would be given a choice to stay or move on. In Perez’s case, they chose to stay on.

Several years had passed and Perez got another call from CPS to ask if she still would be willing to be a foster parent to other children. Perez naturally agreed and has been raising two toddlers Jodie and the above-mentioned, Antoinette.

“When I first met Jodie, she was screaming and didn’t want to let go of her social worker,”

plenty of need Not all children have a fate as fortunate as the ones with Perez.

The Bureau of Social Services Administration (BOSSA), which administers various child welfare programs including CPS and the Home Evaluation and Placement Services, is always looking for more people interested in becoming foster parents, says Mae Fe D. Muyco, a social worker with the CPS – Investigation Unit.

BOSSA is part of the Department of Public Health and Social Services’ Division of Public Welfare.

According to CPS, 1,403 referrals were received and over 2,000 of Guam’s children were the subject of CPS’ report and investigation in 2010. Of the number of referrals, close to 500 of them were for observed physical abuse.

Child abuse prevention month Incidentally, April has been pro-

claimed as “Child Abuse Prevention Month” and also “Sexual Assault Awareness Month.” One week in April is designated as “Crime Victims Rights Week.”

This year it’s from April 10 to April 16.

Muyco and the BOSSA team are coordinating several events throughout the month. Muyco, who worked for CPS from 1994 until 2003, returned to the unit in 2009 as the need for more social workers for the unit grew.

She has been working tirelessly with CPS to ensure the island’s children have basic needs met and for the prevention of abuse among Guam’s younger population. One of her projects is to develop events and services geared toward increasing public awareness of the prevalence of child abuse and to educate the community on its prevention. The public is invited to “Saturday Story Hour” at the Nieves M. Flores Memorial Library on April 23 from 10 a.m. to 12 noon for “Body Safety,” part of an effort to raise awareness and promote the prevention of sexual violence and child abuse on the island.

Muyco says she returned to CPS because she “enjoyed working with children and hoped to make a difference.” Muyco and other members of CPS’ team definitely made a difference in the lives of Perez and the four children in her home.

“I love my kids to death,” Perez says. “I’m really proud of them, too. My two oldest kids are adults now and are currently employed.

My two younger ones are wellloved and getting so much attention,” said Perez.

For more information about foster parenthood or to inquire about Child Abuse Prevention Month events, contact CPS by calling its Hagåtña office at 4752672 or 2653. 

See Clearly | April 2011

Looking at swirls?

By Peter Lombard M.D.

Have you ever noticed little "cobwebs" or specks that float about in your vision? You're not alone — just about everyone experiences this visual phenomenon.

You may have found these "floaters" are more noticeable in bright light, or if you're staring at a blank white wall. These small, dark, shadowy shapes can look like spots, thread-like strands, or squiggly lines. They move as your eyes move and seem to dart away when you try to look at them directly. They do not follow your eye movements precisely, and usually drift when your eyes stop moving. Most people have floaters and learn to ignore them; they are usually not noticed until they become numerous or more prominent.

What are floaters?

About 80 percent of the eye is filled with a gel-like substance which is called the vitreous. As we get older, the vitreous naturally shrinks and becomes more liquefied. As the vitreous shrinks, it becomes somewhat stringy, and the strands can cast tiny shadows on the retina.

These are floaters. Floaters are more likely to develop as we age, and are more common in those who are very nearsighted, have diabetes, or who have had a cataract operation.

In most cases, floaters are part of the natural aging process and simply an annoyance. They can be distracting at first, but eventually become less bothersome.

Are floaters dangerous?

By themselves, floaters are almost always harmless and benign. However, there are other, more serious causes of floaters, including infection, inflammation (uveitis), hemorrhaging, retinal tears, and injury to the eye.

A sudden increase in the number or size of floaters, eye pain or redness, light flashes, or peripheral vision loss, could indicate a more serious eye condition and should prompt an urgent visit to your eye care specialist.

Some people in their middle ages can experience new floaters due to a process called a posterior vitreous detachment, or PVD. A PVD is not the same thing as a retinal detachment. The former condition commonly occurs with age, as the liquefied vitreous of the eye pulls away from the back of the eye. Still, an eye evaluation is recommended because PVDs sometimes can cause little holes in the retina that can in fact lead to retinal detachments.

Is there a treatment for floaters?

For people who have float-

ers that are simply annoying, no treatment is recommended.

On rare occasions, floaters can be so dense and numerous that they significantly affect vision. In these cases, a vitrectomy, a surgical procedure that removes floaters from the vitreous, may be considered.

A vitrectomy removes the vitreous gel, along with its floating debris, from the eye. The vitreous is replaced with a salt solution.

This operation carries significant risks to sight because of possible complications, which include retinal detachment, retinal tears, and cataract. Eye surgeons are generally very reluctant to recommend this surgery unless the floaters significantly interfere with vision.

Retinal Detachment Floaters are also symptoms that can be seen with an impending retinal detachment. To help understand this, think of the retina as a thin layer of wallpaper that is pressed against the inside of the back wall of the eye. This special layer of tissue contains the photoreceptor cells (rods and cones) that enable us to see. A retinal detachment occurs when any part of the retina, is lifted or pulled from its normal position.

A retinal detachment is a serious condition and should always

be considered an emergency. If left untreated, it can lead to permanent visual impairment within two or three days or even blindness in the eye. A retinal detachment can occur at any age, but it is more common in people over age 40. It affects men more than women and Caucasians more than African Americans. A retinal detachment is also more likely to occur in people who are extremely nearsighted, those who have had a retinal detachment in the other eye, people with a family history of retinal detachment, those who have had cataract surgery, and people with previous eye injuries.

Symptoms include a sudden or gradual increase in either the number or size of floaters, and/or light flashes in the eye. Another symptom is the appearance of a curtain over part of their vision. This can affect any part of the vision, but in the most subtle cases only affects one area in the far peripheral vision. Those who experience these symptoms should have an eye care specialist examine their eyes as soon as possible. 

Peter Lombard, M.D. comes from a family with strong medical ties to Guam. He is a Lieutenant Commander in the US Navy and was recently assigned to Naval Hospital Guam as the only military ophthalmologist on the island. He attended the US Naval Academy for undergraduate training, and completed medical school at Johns Hopkins University. The statements expressed here are his own and do not necessarily represent the views of the US Navy or US Government.

Special Section | April 2011

Nobody's perfect. Remember that you can't please everybody every time. Smile every chance you get. Keep a journal.

What is Managing stress: Stress? A primer on conquering tension

By Frank Whitman

A discussion about stress and how to manage it in our lives, probably ought to begin with some understanding of what we mean by the term.

Most often when we use the word “stress” we are referring to something negative. This is undoubtedly because the negative health consequences of unmanaged stress can be quite serious — they include heart disease and stroke.

This understanding of stress is most in line with the definition offered in the 1980s by the psychologist Richard Lazarus, that it is a feeling that someone has when he or she perceives that “demands exceed the personal and social resources the individual is able to mobilize.” That is, that a person feels that his or her life is out of control — that he or she cannot keep up with what needs to be done.

It might be useful to know that the modern medical understanding of stress only began in the 1930s when a physiologist, Walter Cannon, identified the body’s “fight or flight” response. That is, when we perceive something that shocks or scares us, we have a physical response — certain hormones are released into our bloodstream that make our breathing speed up, make our heart rate increase, direct increased blood flow to our muscles and limbs, decrease sensitivity to pain, and make us more alert and energetic. Essentially, the body is prepared to confront some perceived threat or run away from it — fight or flight.

Note that we don’t actually have to be in danger to have the response; we just have to think that we are.

Our emotions cause the physical re-

CONTINUED next page

22

THE HIGH ROAD APRIL 2011

By Frank Whitman

Taking what we know about stress helps us to understand and make use of several well-known and accepted ways to reduce its negative impact.

Control your workload There is any number of websites, magazine articles, sem-

inars, and other sources of information about time management and organizational skills. This information helps you formulate strategies for managing the workload and keeping you from being overwhelmed.

Ask for help — take some of the pressure off of yourself.

Don’t volunteer to be stressed. When possible, say “No” to commitments that you can’t handle.

Control the way you see what stresses you.

Reframe your thinking about the tasks you face. In recent years, we have come to call problems “challenges” — opportunities to succeed and show what we can do rather

than burdens to be suffered.

Mistakes are “learning experiences,” etc. Put a positive spin on what might first appear negative.

Stay positive. Remember that a positive perspective on your tasks will generate the type of stress that helps you.

Work toward something that you want to accomplish, not necessarily something that is just dropped on you.

Assess the consequences of failure. When faced with a seemingly daunting task, ask yourself, “What is the worst that can happen, if this doesn’t get done successfully?” Most often the answer is something that is not so bad, or at least bearable — and not worth the stress.

Expect disappointments and

Live Easy | Special Section | April 2011

Get away from your problems — for a while Spend time on what is really important. Schedule regular time for your family, your spiritual life and

agement program involves exercise. For one thing, it gives the energy that stress generates (the fight or flight response) someplace to go rather than just being bottled up as we sit at a desk (and in a vehicle and in front of the TV) all day.

Eat healthy A good diet is essential to our general health and ability to absorb stress. A poor diet may lay

Expect disappointments and frustrations. They are

part of life and quite often due to things beyond your control. They do not define you as a person unless you let them. Move on. for yourself. When you are with your family, for example, be with them — don’t check your messages or worry about work. Keep your life in perspective.

Take a break. Go on vacation, develop a hobby, watch a movie or read for pleasure. Give yourself time to unwind and recharge.

Practice relaxation techniques.

There are a number of programs that teach muscle relaxation, deep breathing or relaxation imagery.

You cannot feel both stressed and relaxed at the same time.

Take care of your physical health Exercise daily. Part of virtually every comprehensive stress man-

CONTINUED sponse.

In the 1950s, another researcher, Hans Selye, found that the stress response was caused by a variety of things — basically anything that put more of a load on us than we were used to, not just things that scared or worried us.

the groundwork for health problems to be aggravated by stress.

Get enough sleep. Like diet, proper sleep habits (at least seven hours a night) are important for general health — and clear thinking, for that matter. Lack of sleep magnifies stress-related problems. ■ More information about stress and stress management can be found online at:

• www.mindtools.com • www.optimalhealthconcepts. com/Stress • www.webmd.com/balance/ stress-management/default. htm

He also found that while the body’s reactions to stress might be healthy and appropriate — having enhanced strength, energy and alertness when going into battle, running away from a bear or, in a modern context, completing an important sales presentation by deadline — stress that lasts too long causes responses that harm the body.

By this line of thinking, stress can be good or bad. Good when it gets us to accomplish things — after all, we probably would have been less likely to com-

Decompress after periods of

HIGH STRESS

By Leo Babauta

My days get jam-packed with activity, meetings, people stopping in to see me, hundreds of email, phone calls and messages, one project after another. I am usually able to maintain calm and focus in the midst of a workday, but sometimes, my abilities get put to the test. I stay calm, but the stress levels can definitely get higher than I care for.

When it gets like that, I need to decompress.

I have a number of tried-andtrue methods that work for me:

Deep breathing: Take

a deep breath. Hold it. Now let it out … slowly. Try counting to 10 as you let out your breath.

Feel the tension and stress flowing out of you with your breath. Repeat 3-10 times, as necessary.

Self-massage: I like to

massage my shoulders, neck, head, lower back. It helps a lot.

Another great relaxation technique is to tense up and then

plete our algebra homework without the boost of adrenaline we got thinking about the consequences of not doing so. Being “in the zone” — having the heightened physical response to accomplish something we enjoy — is a form of good stress.

Stress is bad when it lasts too long and the body cannot recover. We are likely to experience negative stress when we take on too many commitments, when we hold ourselves to an unrealistically high standard, or when we fail to just take a break and recharge

relax each muscle in your body, one at a time, starting from your toes up to your head.

Exercise: It really gets the stress out of your system and gives you some quiet time to think when you exercise. Or simply take a walk around your building.

Get outdoors: It’s nice to connect with nature and take in the beauty around you. While you’re there, stretch, yawn, take CONTINUED PAGE 40 mentally, emotionally and physically.

Virtually everyone agrees that life without stress is not possible or even desirable. That would mean a life without problems, which is simply unrealistic. And it would mean a life in which we do not try to achieve or experience anything out of the ordinary, which would be quite a boring life indeed. Proper stress management, then, is key to healthy, successful, full lives. ■

Anger is counterproductive. Evaluate your dilemmas carefully before you react. Eat slowly and enjoy your food.

frustrations. They are part of life and quite often due to things beyond your control. They do not define you as a person unless you let them; move on.

Peace of Mind | Special Section | April 2011

You can't be great at everything. Remember that you can't please everybody every time. Reflect on a job well done.

Bananas: Good for body and soul

By Frank Whitman

James Agustin’s work on his family’s Merizo banana farm is a far cry from a massage, nor does it resemble a vacation, but he considers it a great stress reliever and calls it “therapeutic.”

After putting in the hours at his “day job” Agustin looks forward to the satisfaction of productive manual labor, of carrying on family tradition, of self-reliance and the solitude of the farm.

“It’s one of the more relaxing things you can do,” says Agustin, who also works as senior ac-

24

count executive with the radio station, KIJI-FM 104. “There’s nobody telling you what to do; you’re really in touch with the earth. You see [the results of] your work in progress. It’s really a matter of getting out and enjoying the environment.”

Agustin works on the five-acre farm seven days a week, though on weekdays he’s limited to the two or so hours between the time he gets home from selling advertising spots and sunset, and on Sundays, he usually fits in a couple of hours of farm work around church and family obligations.

However, his Saturdays begin at 4 a.m. when he gets up to take the 200 to 300 pounds of bananas he’s harvested during the week to the flea market in Dededo and then spends the rest of the day planting, irrigating, cutting plants and otherwise tending to his crop.

THE HIGH ROAD APRIL 2011

"You hear the sound of the leaves, the ocean, smell the air and feel the dirt on your hands.

It’s an awesome feeling when you’re done."

- James Agustin Agustin began working the farm when he was 14 years old. That was when he and his family returned to Guam after his father, then-1st Sgt. Joseph Agustin, retired from the Army. They moved to Merizo, and he and his parents began farming the land that belonged to the family of his mother, Lourdes Barcinas Agustin.

The fact that farming as a practice has been handed down from previous generations is a significant part of its attraction for Agustin. “I’m really proud of [the farm],” he says. “It’s a good representation of what my mom did, what her brothers did, what her father did and what her father’s father did. That’s the tradition that was passed on to us — it is

While he has five siblings, he is the only one who continues to work the farm with his parents, though now his five-year-old daughter, Arianna, accompanies him while he tends the crops.

Agustin says he feels that his experience selling bananas since he was a teenager has served him well during the seven years he has been doing radio advertising sales. “That was my first selling experience,” he says. “I was selling the bananas at the flea market out of the back of my pickup truck. To be noticed, you have to be a little louder. We always make sure our bananas are ripened just right. We know what the people want and we make sure that we always have good customer service.

I guess that’s why I like business and sales.”

While he experiences frustration occasionally when people steal bananas, he takes other

setbacks, such as losses from the weather, in stride.

“You use [ruined plants] for fertilizer and for the crabs to eat on the farm,” he says. “I don’t think the bananas are ever really wasted because it comes from the land and goes back to it. We make the best of it.”

Bananas are the primary focus of Agustin’s work on the farm, but they are not the only crops he raises. “I tried my hand at growing flowers and I’m actually pretty good at it,” he says. The farm also produces herbs — cilantro, thyme, oregano and basil — as well as taro, breadfruit, pepper, kalamansi, mango and dagu. He also sells to local restaurants.

While the work is hard, Agustin says he finds it and the solitude satisfying. “You’re by yourself and everything’s quiet; you hear the sound of the leaves, the ocean, smell the air and feel the dirt on your hands,” he says. It’s an awe-

some feeling when you’re done. I don’t feel tired when I’m out there. Even when I’m sweating my butt off, on the inside I feel good.”

Agustin says that with sales he spends a lot of time waiting for decisions and results that are out of his control. But with bananas, he is responsible for the result from start to finish, and “I harvest on Monday and sell on Saturday and make the money off of the harvest.

It’s a lot quicker.”

He also appreciates the escape from the stress of the 9-to-5 world he is afforded by the farm. “I’m more relaxed when I’m [farming],” he says. “When you’re doing a job like sales and things like that, you have to change how you act and how you speak and how you convey yourself, because you’re not only representing yourself but you’re also representing an organization. Once I start down that road [into the farm], once I cross that threshold, I forget about all the other stuff.” ■

Fathers.com | Special Section | April 2011

Stress is contagious. In this age of high expectations and long work hours, it’s easy for a man to bring his worries and frustrations home and spread them all over the household.

A dad might treat his family like his boss treats him, which can be very destructive. Or some men might start resenting their family responsibilities, and expect to just relax on the sofa when they get home. Of course, that’s an insult to wives, since they have stresses of their own after a day corralling the kids or working somewhere else.

growing distance between you and your wife, it may be time to start thinking about a job change. Have a heart-to-heart about your true values and priorities.

More options?

What can we do?

First, recognize the value of “decompression time.” Take some time in the car—or in your first few minutes home—to adjust your frame of mind. Exercise, read the newspaper, shower, change clothes. After a few minutes alone, you can shift gears and be ready for family time.

Keep communicating Second, keep communicating—even about the stresses you’re facing. It’s easy for a wife to feel like she’s going through the stressful work situation with her husband. But if she is informed about your work situation and she

believes in the value of the work you’re doing, that will be a positive factor. Communicating will help both of you stay aware of the stresses, and can make you both more forgiving when one of you is in a bad mood.

Looking for a less stressful, more flexible position may cause more stress for a while, but you know you’re doing it for the right reasons. Even if the new position pays less, that’s an adjustment that most families can make. And isn’t your marriage worth it?

Bigger steps

You know, there are a lot of divorced men and fathers right now—still working in highstress jobs—who regret not making changes sooner to try to save their families.

Third, realize that sometimes bigger steps are necessary. If you’re stressed out or blaming your family for your tension, or if there’s a

Dad, don’t let a stressful job slowly erode the foundations of your marriage and family. Take steps to protect it, starting today. ■

Anger is counterproductive. Evaluate your dilemmas carefully before you react. Eat slowly and enjoy your food.

hard work, but it is family.”

Peace of Mind | Special Section | April 2011

Make a list of what's on your mind. Remember that you can't please everybody every time. Your time is just that.

By Deane Jessee-Jones

A Modern MOM'S Guide to

Time Management

Keeping your life in balance when swamped by responsibilities

I have had two separate lives.There is my life before kids, which was ultimately uncomplicated. If I made a bed, it stayed that way until I slept in it.

If I made brownies, they were there until I ate them. If I wanted to watch television, take a nap, go to the gym, or meet friends after work, I could.

Even my scissors were always in the drawer, and amazingly I always had tape.

No one was counting on me to fix dinner or help them with homework. No one needed me to drive them anywhere or help put together a last minute science project. In that life, time management was nice. It allowed me to get more done, but it was not a necessity.

Now in this new life of the last 14 years, time management is essential to my sanity, or what little I have left.

Friends often comment that things seem to run so effortlessly at my house. But, truthfully it is the effort that makes them run. One of the first lessons as a parent is that you are no longer in control of your universe.

The tiny creature that you call your child is. They will be sick on your presentation day. They will wake you up early on your one morning off.

They will need braces, while you are saving for that big vacation. They will present challenges you could never dream up. I still remember trying to get a few minutes to talk to my close friend, Maureen, when all

26

of a sudden my toddler, who is now 14, decided to throw the cat off the second floor balcony. To this day, Maureen still teases me about shouting,” don’t throw the cat,” and then dropping her call, as I jumped into rescue mode for the poor frightened animal. Because of the ultimate chaos, some parents give in and the rooms become a mess, dinner becomes take out, and days just fly by until that day when the nest is once again empty and you return to that first life … of quiet and order, or at least chaos that you control.

But there are ways to make it all run a little more smoothly.

Time management is really your only solution, and if you, like me thought having one baby was great, so why not have a couple more … well you really need this.

THE HIGH ROAD APRIL 2011

CALENDARS First get a calendar. It can be electronic or on a wall. But use it to fill in all the birthdates, school holidays, performances, and games. Don’t try to hold on to all the calendars and papers your kids bring home. Create a central calendar and use that to run your home, and then throw those papers away. Color code the calendar with each person having a different color; this way in a glance you can see who has what. Same with those appointment cards put them on the calendar then toss the cards. The last thing you

need is extra clutter. Your kids and their toys provide enough of this.

Create Staging Places Next, create a staging place for everything. This can be baskets, hooks, or just a place in the house where backpack and school stuff goes. When the kids come home, back packs go there, so you can go through and pull out any papers and forms, and they are not left for you or someone else to trip over. Lunch boxes straight to the kitchen sink. My kids know

Deane Jessee-Jones lives with her husband, Jay and three children: Jake, Jenna, and Jeremy in Mangilao. She works as an Educational Therapist and Consultant for Brain Builders Guam and Saipan. Send questions or comments to: brainbuilding@gmail.com. For more information on training programs available in Guam and Saipan go to: http://guam.processingskills.com.

Smart Money | Special Section | April 2011 a list and stick to it. Go to the store once a week and buy only what’s on your list. It may be easier to do if you make sure you are not hungry when you shop and you leave the kids at home. I like to look at Friday’s ads then depending on what is on sale, plan the week’s meals around the sales. This saves you a lot of time in the long run, because you are only shopping once, and you already know

Don’t try to tackle the whole house at one time. Just sweep as you are boiling water ... or take 5-10 minutes to do small chores. everyone not only takes it to their room, but is responsible for putting it away. This includes younger children. They may need assistance at first, but they can straighten their rooms and put stuff away.

Before bed, everyone lays out clothes for the next day.

Rooms are straight and backpacks are packed and in their spot. That way in the morning there should be no hassles.

This straightening takes place in all rooms, so the newspapers and mail also have a place, and they go there, not just on the counter. Baskets and bins work wonderfully for this. You know it is time to sort it, when nothing else fits in the bin.

Cleaning as You Go Cleaning can take place little by little. As your kids get older they will be able to help with chores. But in the beginning it will all be left to the parents.

Don’t try to tackle the whole house at one time. Just sweep as you are boiling water, or take 5-10 minutes to do small chores.

This is not as overwhelming, and it allows you to stay on top of things until you have time for a deep clean.

Mealtime Prep Plan meals for the week. Make

what you’re cooking. You can switch the menus from day to day. I just try to use the fresh produce earlier in the week and switch to the canned by the end of the week, so that nothing spoils. And if it is a product you use regularly that doesn’t spoil, like say toilet paper, and it is on sale, stock up.

Separate Unwanted Items Lastly, when something is too small, too big, broken, or no longer of use, have a place for it.

Don’t bother putting it back in the room. I keep boxes for recycling and for the next garage sale at all times. When they get full, then I have to deal with them. But things never go back into the rooms until they are fixed, and if they are ready to be discarded, they just go into their box and wait.

For me these little things make life run smoother. My kids still throw me off with the unexpected, but that is what makes life interesting. I look forward to someday having less chaos. I know then I will miss the mess and hope for some grandkids to bring back that noise and clutter, even for a few hours. So manage your time, but expect the unexpected, and somehow we will all survive parenthood. ■

Money on your mind?

Fending off financial anxiety

By Mike San Nicolas Few things are more stressful than money. People struggling to make ends meet understand this, and higher net worth individuals do too, as they have a different set of worries and obligations to meet. The best way to manage the stress associated with money is to be organized and have a plan for what you are trying to do.

Know thyself Make sure that you have a firm handle on how much money you have coming in, and how much you are spending on needs and wants.

Too many people get caught up in using credit cards that they swipe away and lose track of how much is going out and on whether or not it is really a necessity. Using cash is the best way to keep track of spending, but you lose out on credit card benefits and conveniences. The basic rule is that if you are good at keeping track of your money, credit is OK to use, but if you have a tendency to go overboard, stick to cash instead.

Look ahead Planning on what you need money for is a great way to reach your goals slowly but surely. If you have young children, starting up a college savings plan early is the best way to build up a good stash for when the time comes to meet higher education expenses. If you plan on being a homeowner, talk to your lender about how much you can qualify for, and find out what the needed

down-payments are to meet your obligation, even if it is years away.

Understanding this will help you to establish a hard number to save for and stick with.

marry smart Weddings are also typically large expenses, and unless you are planning on marrying someone after meeting them for a brief period of time, you most likely will have many months, if not years, to put money away for the big day. Planning for a wedding is a great way to get to know the financial habits of your partner, that way both of you have a good understanding of each others’ organizational skills and abilities to meet your goals.

Debt in perspective The best way to quickly tackle money related stress is to attack the source of it – debt. Look at your existing debts and figure out how to tackle them best. Some people use the snowball approach, where they pay down the smallest debt first and roll the amount into the next smallest and so on, so that they can get momentum to reach their goal. Others focus on paying off the debt with the highest interest rate first, so that they can tackle their interest expenses right away. Depending on whether momentum or savings is your prime motivator, choose between the two.

The key is to make a choice, and tackle debt head-on. ■

Michael San Nicolas is a Wealth Manager with BG Wealth Management Services in the Bank of Guam, and serves as a Financial Advisor with an educational certificate in Financial Planning. A proud husband and father, Michael is the author of "A Father's Hand: Lessons for Life from Father to Son.”

Anger is counterproductive. Evaluate your dilemmas carefully before you react. Eat slowly and enjoy your food.

this. That way later that evening I am not hunting them down. Lunches are made the night before. Yes, it is annoying at times, but after dinner while the kitchen is still a mess, I prepare the lunch for the next day. Even if it is just going to be leftovers, I sort it so in the morning there is less to deal with. Laundry gets done a load while I dress in the morning and usually a load or two at night. It is then sorted and

Fitness | Special Section | April 2011

Anger is counterproductive. Evaluate your dilemmas carefully before you react. Eat slowly and enjoy your food.

Stretch Relief

Peace of Mind | Special Section | April 2011

There's beauty in imperfection. Remember that you can't please everybody every time. Smile every chance you get.

By Gennette Quan Simmons

What's your hurry?

Follow the rules to make driving easier on the nerves Some of the worst incidents on Guam’s roads are car crashes and the practice of unsafe pedestrian crossings that have resulted in serious injury or death. According to Guam Police Department’s Sgt. John Bagaforo, the most common reasons for car crashes are caused by, “roadway deficiencies, mechanical and human error.”

Running a red stop light is a common violation on Guam’s roadways.

“I’ve seen (while off duty) numerous operators enter the

ing down when it begins to rain and increase your following distance,” Smith added.

Motorists should take the time to take stock of their driving be-

Driving aggressively is dangerous. It kills. And it’s against the law.

Sgt. Cecil Sulla, GPD, Cecilia Javier, OHS, DPW, and Sgt. John Bagaforo, GPD emphasize the importance of safe driving.

Law enforcement officials and driving experts agree that car crashes and other driving-related occurrences are mostly preventable if motorists simply adhere to safe driving practices and follow the law.

According to Bagaforo most collisions and traffic violations occur during peak driving hours when people are going to work in the morning, returning from lunch, or driving home after work. Driving under heavy traffic conditions can be extremely stressful. We will explore key strategies that will not only alleviate stress but also keep you and others who share the roads safe.

Aggressive Driving The National Highway Traffic Safety Administration (NHTSA) describes aggressive driving as occurring when "an individ-

30

ual commits a combination of moving traffic offenses so as to endanger other persons or property." Driving over the legal speed limit, following another driver too closely, ignoring posted road signs, and most notably running red stop lights, are some of the more obvious examples of aggressive driving.

“It is evident everyday by the general public’s blatant disregard for speed limits and traffic signs. People who follow the laws, like speed limit signs or stopping at red lights before making a right turn at a red light, are honked at, or passed in a dangerous manner. Yellow lights are ignored and treated like a ‘hurry up and get through before it turns red’ light, instead of a ‘stop if you safely can’ light, like the law states,” Colleen Smith, owner and instructor for Guam Driving School, said.

THE HIGH ROAD APRIL 2011

intersection despite their directional light turning red. I counted 15 vehicles on one occasion,” Bagaforo said.

havior. Some helpful questions to consider include:

“People who ignore the speed limit signs are putting everyone at risk. Those who ignore merge signs are in danger of sideswiping cars. Following too closely is a recipe for a crash,” Smith said.

• Are you attentive?

“Motorcyclists need to be treated like a car and given the same courtesy and respect as a car — which means give them the same space on the road as you would give a regular sized car. The reverse for this is true too. Motorcyclists and moped users must follow the same rules that apply to cars. Which means you cannot drive your motorcycle down the line between two rows of cars waiting at a red light and "cut" in front of the line,” Smith said.

Common Courtesy The lack of common courtesy on the road is a major factor in car collisions. But more importantly it is a disregard for one’s safety and those who share the roads. Statistics prove your chances of being involved in a collision are greater when you choose to disregard the rules of the road by speeding, improperly changing lanes, disregarding traffic control signals, being inattentive or driving at an inadequate following distance.

“I tell my students that a safe following distance and proper blind spot checks will help prevent crashes, Smith said.

Another safe practice is “slow-

• Are you courteous?

• Are you using common sense?

Driving Strategies Drivers can minimize their chances of being in a collision by “being defensive and aware of your surroundings,” Bagaforo said. He encourages motorists to drive defensively by “staying within the speed limit and allowing one car length to the vehicle in front of you every 10 miles an hour.” Smith advo-

Smith

cates the following safe driving practices:

Have a safe following distance The Guam handbook defines this as maintaining a distance of one car length for every 10 miles per hour of speed. So if you are traveling at 35 miles per hour then you should have the space of 3.5 cars between you and the car ahead of you.

Tail-gating another car does not get you anywhere faster.

It only increases your chance of rear-ending the car ahead of you.

Communicate your actions This means use your turn signals to indicate when you intend to change lanes, turn corners, or slow down and stop (through your brake lights).

Drive defensively A defensive driver should always take preventative measures on the road. If you encounter another motorist who is driving recklessly or aggressively you should, “back off from this person. Change lanes or turn off the road onto a side street. Pull into a gas station or a store to get out of the way. Call the police and report their reckless driving behavior before someone gets hurt,” Smith said.

“Allow the aggressor to pass.

The more distance one places themselves from this behavior the better,” Bagaforo added.

Public interest “Our Guam roads are important thoroughfares for motorists, bicyclists and pedestrians. Because they are so heavily traveled, an accident can occur everyday, costing personal injury and property, Cecilia Javier, Highway Safety Coordinator for the Office of Highway Safety, Department of Public Works, said.

In an effort to promote safe driving the Office of Highway Safety has rolled out the Distracted Driving Campaign to improve driving in Guam.

“During this time, our local enforcement agencies will be increasing enforcement along Guam's roadways as well. But we need your help,” Javier said. ■ The Office of Highway Safety would like to remind motorists to:

• Always use your seat belt and make sure everyone else is buckled up.

• Don't drink and drive. Always designate a sober driver.

• Don't speed. Obey traffic speed signs.

• Drive defensively • Avoid rear-end collisions.

Check your brake lights often, signal before you turn or change lanes • Follow at a safe distance.

• Avoid aggressive behavior

driving

• Be courteous • Don't ever text and drive or read your email while driving.

• If you need to make a call, pull over to a safe area first.

• Pull over to a safe location to address situations with your children in the car • Focus on the task at hand.

Refrain from smoking, eating, drinking, reading and any other activity that takes your mind and eyes off the road.

You are not your job. Don't forget to do the things that bring you joy, Don't put off any choices you need to make,

Roundtable Talk | Special Section | April 2011

SOCIAL STUDIES

Leigh Leilani Graham Director, Guam USO

Lin C. Manalo Vice President, Private Banking Officer/Senior Wealth Advisor Guam & CNMI Region Office

Jeffrey Tomas Marchesseault Marketing Director, DNA, Inc.

Vanesalyn Villaverde Marketing Officer for a Multi-national company

Have you been through a recent stressful situation?

Manalo: Friday, March 11 when Guam was in a tsunami warning with the ETA of 7:09 p.m. and I was still out getting last minute emergency items for the house, on the cell phone making sure all four kids, my parents and hubby were home already. All these rambling stressful thoughts went to my head since I was still out at 6:45 p.m., stuck in traffic. I finally got home at 6:55 p.m. I was so relieved and happy to see my family! I started getting the home ready and the family together for a prayer.

wide, corporate company and am under a supervisor that expects nothing but the best. My field of work, marketing, is also ranked one of the top ten stressrelated professions in the US. I am faced with deadline after deadline, budget allocation and balancing, regional compliance, maintaining local and international business relationships, multi-program management and company goal attainment day in and day out. It’s a bit much sometimes, but if you have a passion for what you do, it’s well worth it!

VILLAVERDE: I find myself in stressful situations on a daily basis. I work for a world-

Marchesseault:

VILLAVERDE: I think I stress

Graham: The most recent situation in which I caused another person stress was during our island’s recent tsunami scare.

Because we live at sea level, my 14-year-old daughter and I needed to evacuate to higher ground.

Because she did not immediately grasp the severity of the situation, I had to become more stern and deliberate in the directions I gave her to evacuate. Once we were in the vehicle and headed towards higher ground, my girl began to share the stress she was feeling about possibly being in great dan-

my boyfriend out the most. Ha-ha!

I’m a very goal oriented person, so I always have to know what direction my life is going and what steps I’m taking to attain the goal. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not a control freak, but I know my needs are stressful for his laid back personality. I try my best not to make the stress from work affect my personal life, likewise I try not to make my personal life conflict with my work performance.

32

My wife and I recently moved our family from Mangilao to Maite

THE HIGH ROAD APRIL 2011

over the course of three weekends. Making the transition required utility and service disconnections and hookups during the week, involved the functional breakdown of a vehicle, and called for snap decisions. It caused extra stress on my wife and me during a time when our individual professional careers have also presented unique challenges to each of us.

Graham: A situation I recall causing me extreme stress during my career was when a person in a leadership position in my upward chain of command responded to a business-related question with anger, hostility and insulting comments. This re-

ger, losing her home, and other fears.

MANALO: I think I do give my

staff at work stress if they have not met the deadlines and it's the final crunch time. So far they have always turned in their projects ahead of time, so I have been blessed with such a great staff at work! My kids say they feel the utmost pressure and stress when their progress and report card comes out. I always reward my kids if they do get straight As, so that's probably

EVERY MONTH, we invite everyday islanders to have a conversation about the topic of the day.

Here’s what they said.

sponse shocked and hurt me because this person was normally highly complementary about my work, and because I respected this person as a leader. I responded to the outburst respectfully and with attention to how I could correct the situation, but was at a complete loss as to how to restore the respect I had lost for this individual. I learned this was not an isolated occurrence and that this type of response had not been limited to me. I then put myself as much as possible in the place of this leader, attempting to assess what might have caused this leader to lose composure. In so doing, I realized many of the stresses that were on his plate. The added perspective enabled and empowered me to calmly respond to the unsubstantiated anger by focusing more on his stress than my own. This allowed me to still perform well for this leader.

why they get stressed out!

Marchesseault: My life-

long career has been in broadcast, marketing and multimedia.

This industry is built on critical timing down to the second. While I always consider one's level of unaffected politeness a measure of their civility, behind the scenes the rigors of the job often leave little time for manners. I'm sure my passion is unvarnished at times.

But I try not to leave a trail of unnecessarily hurt feelings.

What positive methods for stress relief have been proven to work for you?

VILLAVERDE: Graham: "I often imagine a worst-case scenario and the reality of my circumstances always pales in comparison to how bad it could be."

MANALO: —- Marchesseault Luckily for me, my office is located right next to the beach. I have a wonderful ocean view from my desk, however, when I feel overwhelmed I go outside and get a breath of fresh air. I find that removing myself from the stressful environment and going to a quiet, peaceful area really helps to calm the nerves. If fresh air just isn’t enough, nothing works better at relaxing the mind and body than a great massage.

I exercise after work or just simply get out of the office and take a breather too. Or, I tell jokes and make some people laugh and that in turn relieves my stress already to see their smiles and hear their laughter. The ultimate stress reliever to me though, is a girl trip to Manila, shopping and all the spa packages!

Marchesseault: I often imagine a worst-case scenario and the reality of my circumstances always pales in comparison to how bad it could be. This exercise makes me laugh at myself and inspires me to draw on the unlimited resources that are

ever present and always pouring forth abundant answers under the thin veil of doubt. This perspective allows me to pray with affirmation and gives me a resilience that obliterates fear and moodiness.

There is only one positive, proven method for stress relief that works for me – prayer. I am far from perfect – and am undeserving but thankful to know that the Holy Spirit, salvation of Jesus Christ, and my faith in our Lord are my true stress relievers. A Bible is always on my desk – not because I am pious or worthy – but because I need the constant strength and guidance it provides for any situation…I start with a daily devotional – one of my favorites is “Hearing From God Each Morning” by Joyce Meyer. It was a gift from my beloved sister, Brook, who battles multiple sclerosis each day. I read the devotion and the associated Bible verse each morning and then talk to God in thanks for my blessings and sustenance for the challenges the day will hold. He always answers – the key is whether or not I am listening. ■

Dining Out | April 2011

Shoreline:

A

B

Upbeat eating in Hagåtña

Any self-proclaimed foodie — with even the most discerning of palates will agree that the new Shoreline restaurant is one you’ll want to make multiple visits to. No special occasion is necessary to visit the Hagåtña restaurant — just a touch of hunger and anticipation for delicious offerings will easily bring you to the upbeat and contemporary eatery.

C

“Shoreline’s aesthetic is very open and modern and lends itself well to fast casual business lunches throughout the week,” says Assistant Manager Janiece Sablan.

“Our unique menu and superb staff keep bringing people back,” Sablan adds.

Full entrees, including Macadamia-Nut Crusted Mahi, Creamy Mushroom Pasta and 10-ounce Rib-eye Steak made to order, anchor a full menu of “small plates,” soups and salads, wraps, burgers, and a separate sushi menu. Don’t forget to turn over your menu – you might miss the restaurant’s selection of drinks and desserts.

“Small plates” is a list of offerings similar in style to Spanish “tapas” where smaller portions of food are presented and traditionally prepared. Multiple orders off the “small plates” list also can be an affordable way for friends to sample a variety of tastes and offerings.

“My favorite dish is the Tempura Crunch Sushi,” Sablan says. “It has just the right amount of spicy sauce with crab, shrimp and avocado – and, the whole thing is rolled in crunchy tempura flakes.”

Other offerings from the sushi menu include the Poki Crunch, prepared with sushi rice, nori (seaweed), tuna and tempura veggies, and the Fiesta Roll, deliciously composed of red rice, chicken kelaguen, cucumber, avocado and chipotle sauce, among others.

Guests wanting to create their own meal might revel in the restaurant’s “build your own burger” menu. First on the list is choosing your type of patty – beef, chicken, fish or veggie – and then choosing your favorite addons to create your personalized version of the all-American meal. Add-ons aren’t only vegetable toppers, but also include sauces, in-

34 THE HIGH ROAD APRIL 2011

D

E

IMAGES OF TASTE

cluding chipotle mayo and wasabi mayo.

Guests can also order the Shoreline Teriyaki Burger, topped with the restaurant’s special teriyaki sauce.

For families, a children’s menu – or the “Manggi Manhoben Menu – is available, stocked with any child’s favorite comfort food like “Kin’s Kiddie Pizza,” “Isa’s Pasta,” and the “Beefy Burger” among others.

Food is only part of the full dining experience. The restaurant also features a full beverage menu with a large selection of specialty coffees and teas, and espresso cocktails. ■

A. Poki Crunch Sushi B. Aljoe Llagas serves up a Cappuccino among many other espresso drinks on the menu. C. Guests enjoy tasty small plates, espresso drinks and free wifi.

D. Coconut Shrimp with Sweet Marmalade dipping sauce. E. Seafood Trio: California Rolls, Poki Skewers and Sashimi all on one plate.

SHORELINE INFORMATION: Shoreline Bar + Kitchen Opening Hours: Monday, 11 a.m. to 10 p.m.

Tuesday to Thursday, 11 a.m. to midnight Friday and Saturday, 11 a.m. to 2 a.m.

Phone number: 475-WAVE (9283)

Style | April 2011

How CHOOSING the RIGHT FRAME for your face CAN IMPROVE YOUR LOOK, and NOT JUST YOUR SIGHT. Eye glasses are one of the first things you see on a person’s face. When you select the right type of eye wear, you’ll make a statement that commands attention. Pick the wrong ones, and you’ll be robbed of the opportunity to make a great first impression!

Your face can be any of the shapes below, or a combination of them. Here’s what could work for you:

Rectangular faces are longer with square jaws, so try frames that are slightly wider than your temples.

McDaniel

Round faces tend to be wide, so angular frames will detract from roundness.

Oval faces are rounded but can have the length of a rectangular face. Many styles like rounded and squared ones will suit this shape.

Heart shaped faces tend to have pointed chins, smaller mouths, and broader foreheads. Round frames and smaller frames may work best.

Square faces have an even jaw and chin line and full cheeks. Oval and rectangle frames with a high temple position will add length.

If you’re not sure what works best, your eye care professional will be able to assist you with this.

Credits: Photography by Eugene C. Herrera Venue: Port of Mocha, Micronesia Mall All frames provided by Garcia Optical, Special thanks to Dr. Dante C. Garcia 36 THE HIGH ROAD APRIL 2011

Kai

Cruz

Galvez

Esplana

Top Row Left to right: Melissa McDaniel has a round face which is wonderfully suited for angular frames. Here she showcases frames by Tenny Rei. Jostin Cruz’s face looks heart-shaped which pairs up nicely with these frames

by Guess.

Ronilla Galvez has an oval-shaped face that is pleasantly paired with these frames by Candies.

Greg Esplana’s oval-shaped face goes well with these Guess frames.

BOTTOM ROW LEFT TO RIGHT:

Duenas

Torre

Kai has an oval-shaped face. She has no problem looking great with these narrowshaped frames by Coach.

Chris Duenas has a rectangular face, so these frames by Nike which are slightly wider than his temples compliment him.

Mary Torre has a slightly square-shaped face which matches beautifully with oval or rectangular frames. She is showcasing frames by Michael Kors.

* Simply Download the FREE software to get started today.

Get creative in adding photos, titles and artwork.

Google a QR reader and download to your smart phone to scan and view this QR code.

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Ask The Bone Doctor | April 2011

Is that a strain or a sprain?

Know the difference between common sports injuries

By Sean Fitzsimmons, M.D. Hi Dr. Fitzsimmons, Can you tell me what the differences are between a sprain, strain and fracture? And also, how to treat them? I hear those terms used a lot, but would like to know more about them.

Thank you!

— Matt

Dear Matt, Your question brings up a few points and it is a common area of confusion for patients. A sprain or strain refers to a soft tissue (ligament, tendon, muscle) injury. Everyone uses the terms a bit differently and the true definitions are not the same, but the point is that they refer to soft tissue injuries. These terms do not differentiate minor from se-

vere injuries.

For example, an ankle sprain is a tear of the ligaments of the ankle. The tear can be minor and cause few symptoms because the ligament is structurally intact or the tear can cause severe symptoms if the ligament is completely torn. The best analogy would be a rope. A rope can have minor fraying or it can be torn in half just like a ligament.

Most patients think of a fracture as a crack in a bone. However, a fracture is the real medical term for a completely broken bone. A bone fracture is just like a stick that is broken in half. There are many types of fractures and some types only happen in chil-

dren. The interesting thing about bones is that they have a blood supply just like your heart or lungs. Often patients think of bones as non-living sticks, but the blood supply is what allows bones to grow and to heal.

The treatment of sprains, strains, and fractures really depends on the body part and the degree of injury. Fractures should be evaluated by a medical professional to optimize the healing environment for the bone. Minor sprains and strains can be treated by rest, ice (don’t put the ice directly on the skin, use a towel between your skin and the ice), braces or wraps, and elevation to decrease swelling. The tricky part is knowing what is minor and what is major.

Usually your pain will guide you, but there are some knee injuries such as meniscal tears or even anterior cruciate ligament tears that may mimic “sprains”

and are instead significant injuries that should be evaluated by a medical professional so be cautious in self-diagnosis. If you have persistent pain or decrease in function make sure to get checked by your doctor.

Thank you for your question. 

Sean Fitzsimmons, M.D. has completed an orthopaedic surgery residency at Mount Sinai Hospital and an orthopaedic sports medicine fellowship at Lenox Hill Hospital, both in New York City. During his fellowship he worked with the New York Jets, New York Islanders, and Division I and II college soccer and basketball teams. He has training in the latest arthroscopic treatments for shoulder problems and knee ligament reconstructions. His office is in the Guam Medical Plaza in Tamuning. If you have any questions for Dr. Sean Fitzsimmons, you can send them to questions@highroadmagazine.com.

Special Section | April 2011

Nobody's perfect. Remember that you can't please everybody every time. Smile every chance you get. Take a breath..

Editor's Note by Carlo Carino

More than

just tips.

What to do when life becomes more than merely stressful If you’ve reached this page after reading the whole issue, I can only hope the things you’ve read have you breathing a little easier. If not, don’t worry.

perseverance is only a solo activity. It’s not.

When to get help

You can't just, “Walk it off.”

I hate the phrase, “Get over it.” Those three simple words are callous, ignorant, and cruel. As I’ve written before, there’s no shame in asking for help.

Don’t beat yourself up for needing it.

When a child falls down during a run in P.E. Class, the teacher might tell them to simply, ‘walk it off.’ This is because children don’t know their limits — they don’t know themselves well enough to judge when real help is needed. This is the good thing about recovering from a fall — it teaches perseverance.

Wrongly, however, it sometimes teaches you that

40

THE HIGH ROAD APRIL 2011

some deep breaths, and enjoy.

Take a day off. I have lots of

vacation and sick leave saved up, so it’s not a problem, actually. I’m just going to veg out and allow myself to calm down.

Meditate: You don’t need to be trained to have a short, relaxing meditation session. Just sit somewhere quiet, close your eyes, relax, and focus on your breathing. Try to concentrate on it coming into your body, and then going out. When other things pop into your head (they will, inevitably), just acknowledge them (don’t try to force them out) and allow them to leave, and then focus again on your breathing.

Read: I like to throw myself on the couch with a good book. Well, not necessarily a good book — a page-turner.

Something that will engross me completely, take my mind off everything else. John Grisham works well for me, as does William Gibson. And Terry Pratchett. Or Ann Pratchett, for that matter. And Stephen King. Just get lost in their world.

You are not alone.

I also hope that we haven’t given you the impression that severe stress is merely an inconvenience that can be overcome with simple changes in your habits or your outlook.

As much as I hate to admit it, you can’t learn everything you need from a magazine.

It’s not a character flaw or a weakness in your personality if you are having difficulty dealing with stress on your own. If you are feeling overwhelmed to an extreme degree, it might be a good idea to turn to outside help.

CONTINUED FROM PAGE 23

Love: I like to spend time with my kids or my wife. Just snuggle with them, focus on them, forget about the world. They are all that’s important, and sometimes I need that reminder.

As is written at medicinenet.com: “If your stress is interfering with your capacity to be happy and lead an emotionally rewarding life, then it may be time to seek professional help. This is especially true if it is persistent. You may also want to talk to your doctor or a counselor if your stress is causing you to experience physical symptoms or worsening of a chronic medical condition.

Finally, seek professional help if you find yourself 'treating' your stress by misuse or abuse of alcohol or drugs, or by engaging in other 'unhealthy behaviors.'”

Many people describe stress as a crushing weight. Let other people help you carry it — and eventually — help you discard it. What a relief it will be. ■

Carlo Cariño is the Editor of The High Road. He is a writer, illustrator, cartoonist, and graphic designer.

He lives in Yigo with his wife, Juvy. You can follow his 100-Pound Challenge at www.itsjustcarlo.com.

Disconnect: Turn

off the phones, turn off the computer, and shut off the outside world for a little while. These things just raise your stress level. Go offline and forget about the online world!

Take a nap. One of my favorites.

Just take a 30-minute nap, and you’re re-set! A nap is like a restart button for life. ■

Leo Babauta is the author of The Power of Less and the creator and blogger at www.zenhabits.net, a Top 100 blog with 175,000 subscribers — one of the top productivity and simplicity blogs on the Internet. It was recently named one of the Top 25 blogs by TIME magazine. Babauta is a former journalist and freelance writer of 18 years, a husband and father of six children.

HE

HAS

RISEN

As we celebrate the miracle of His resurrection, we also celebrate the joy of His abiding presence in our lives.

MAY YOUR EASTER AND ALL YOUR DAYS BE BLESSED WITH

HIS WONDERFUL LOVE.

“...It is true! The Lord has risen...”

Luke 24:34 (NIV)