The High Road | Guam's Guide to Elevating Your Life | May 2011 | We ❤ Mom

MAY 2011 — GUAM’S GUIDE TO ELEVATING YOUR LIFE | LIVING | FITNESS | STYLE | TECH | STRONGER MIND + BODY

Page 4 | RIDES: the 2012 Honda Civic

VOL. 2, Issue 6

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A special tribute to the women WHO SHAPE US ALL • Fashions for modern moms • Life lessons that stay with us • Appreciating the moms around us • Coping when roles are reversed • Holding on to the memories

PUBLISHER'S POST The High Road, May 2011, Volume 2 NO. 6

Memories of Lola Hold A Special place in My Heart Moms will always have a special place in our hearts.

But, grandmothers can just as easily occupy a space right next to them. after-the-fact-humor, she explained that when I was three years old, she fed me a piece of hard candy.

I had tried to swallow the treat and it got lodged in my throat. Lola eventually heard my sister’s cries of panic, mixed with my gasps for air.

She took hold of me and delivered a karate chop to the back of my neck. Her swift action forced the candy straight out of my mouth!

I recently flipped through a tattered family album and found a rare photo of my grandma, Dolores Sevilla. Warm memories filled my head. And soon, I was adrift on a mental journey back to the early 1980s, when the photo was first snapped in the Philippines.

Some details stand out, like convincing my lola (grandmother) Loling to smile for the camera. Lola’s body was noticeably frail, yet she still glowed with inner strength and poise. Gray and silver strands of hair revealed her years of experience, but not without giving her a more respectable air.

Eventually, she radiated a combined expression of wisdom and joy.

My lola Loling has an exclusive place in my heart because she’s the only grandparent I’ve ever known. And among other special things about her, she actually saved my life!

I have no recollection of my near-death experience, so my sister Ana Mae remains my source for the details. With expressions of fear, remorse and

before leaving for the airport, I mustered enough courage to give her a heartfelt goodbye. I crushed the crippling feelings of embarrassment which tried to overcome me, and mumbled, “Lola, I love you.” I knew that saying those precious words would prevent a lifetime of regret. It wasn’t the confident delivery I expected from myself, but it was sincere.

Lola Loling remained an upstanding woman who imparted the importance of preserving one’s dignity and reputation.

Though lola’s overall demeanor was lady like, she also had a few surprising habits. She and her friends played card games, chewed betel nut and smoked tobacco wrapped with banana leaves.

Lola Loling remained an upstanding woman who imparted the importance of preserving one’s dignity and reputation.

Often, she would sit on the wooden floor below an altar.

Unable to kneel, her legs remained tucked to her side as the weight of her body rested on her left hand. Sometimes, I would overhear her prayers to the Lord, spoken in her native dialect.

My last visit to lola Loling was in the Summer of 1997. Just

definition: the high road also high·road n. The most positive, diplomatic, or ethical course.

Lola responded by nodding. Without verbal expression, her teary eyes spoke for her. It didn’t dawn on me that the moment would be my last with her. On June 7, 2004, the Good Lord called lola Loling to rest at the age of 89. May she rest in peace.

In closing, we hope you enjoy our Motherhood-themed edition. It gave our team profound joy to put it together as a tribute to all moms! Hope to see you again next month.

Sincerely,

Publisher Norman Analista Editor & DESIGNER Carlo Cariño Writers Hernalin Analista Leo Babauta Juvy Gao-ay Cariño Dave Currie, Ph. D. Jill Espiritu Sean Fitzsimmons, M.D. Peter Lombard, M.D. Steve Oshiro MaryAnn Pangelinan Gennette Quan-Simmons Dave Ramsey Darlene Deloso Stremmelaar Frank Whitman Photography Eugene C. Herrera ADVERTISING SALES Greg Esplana Janet Kerrebrock Published by Triple J Creative Services For advertising Inquiries contact: Tel: 648-6081 Fax: 649-3679 ads@highroadmagazine.com THE HIGH ROAD Vol. 2 No. 6 is published 12 times per year (monthly)

by Triple J Creative Services, 157 South Marine Corps Drive Tamuning, Guam 96913; (671) 646-9126.

Copyright 2010 by Triple J Creative Services. All rights reserved. The reporting in THE HIGH ROAD is meant to increase your knowledge in various areas of life and well-being.

Because everyone is different, the ideas expressed and research shared cannot be used to diagnose or treat individual health or other problems.

Seek professional help. The views expressed in this publication are the views of the authors and do not necessarily reflect the views or policies of Triple J Creative Services, its staff, management or its Board of Directors.

Triple J Creative Services makes no representation concerning and does not guarantee the source, originality, accuracy, completeness or reliability of any statement, information, data, finding, interpretation, advice, opinion, or view presented.

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TABLE OF CONTENTS

Page 26 Page 18 The Rundown 4 | Rides: The 2012 Honda Civic 6 | Doing Family Right: Mom DNA 8 | Community Pulse 9 | Reflections: Millie Lujan 10 | Lessons I Learned from my mother 13 | How-To: Make Your Own Corsage 14 | Lessons I Learned From My Children 16 | Social Studies: Military Moms 18 | Workout: A Transformation Story 20 | See Clearly: A Mother's Eyes 22 | Style: Fashionable Moms 26 | Wellness: Caring for Mom and Dad 28 | A Mother's Day Remembrance 30 | Live Easy: Handling Criticism 31 | Parenting: Understanding Your Wife 32 | Ask Dave: Accepting Assistance 33 | Dining Out: Nana's Cafe 36 | Fitness: Strength Imbalances Pt. 2 38 | Good Works: Help for Diabetics

Page 33 On the Cover Mothers (clockwise) Becky Espinosa, Millie Lujan, and Caroline Sablan grace our cover this month. Read more about them in the following pages.

Also on the cover is the 2012 Honda Civic Sedan available at the Triple J Auto Group.

Rides | May 2011

Doing Family Right | Relationships | May 2011

By Dave Currie Ph. D.

The DNA of

a Great Mother Reflecting on a lifetime of love and support

Her name is Mother Sometimes known as Mommy, Mom, Ma or Mumsy. Each verbal expression conjures up its own sentiment complete with a host of memories. A universal trait of us all, every one has a mother. And each is as unique as the fingerprints she bears. I remember my mother through so many great moments that I will cherish forever. Hard to believe it’s been ten years since she lost her battle with cancer.

Please allow me to reminisce and hit a few highlights of my life with mom. In the process, I am convinced we will likely uncover the DNA of a great mother.

6 THE HIGH ROAD MAY 2011

Early memories The first incident I’ll recall was when I was four and five years old. I was fighting a nasty earache and couldn’t sleep. In the dark of night, I left my room for the comfort of my parents because if anyone could take the pain away, they could. Whether eardrops made a difference or not, they were part of the cure.

But what really soothed this little boy’s heart was the comfort of my mother’s assuring words, her warm arms around me, the beating of her heart, the rocking of the chair and her soft humming of an old hymn. I felt safe.

My first grade birthday party holds a ton of great memories.

For many years, I was allowed to invite every kid in my class. Imagine ... what an event! I remember mom’s extra effort with the crazy games, the scavenger hunt, the hotdogs and Kool-Aid, and then the decorated cake. She made it all happen. Then, I got to open up all 26 presents (most I am sure were from the S. S. Kresge’s Department Store, the forerunner to K-Mart). I ceremoniously lined up the gifts against the side of my house. Because of mom’s commitment to encourage me, I flourished in her special attention. The kids talked about my party for weeks. I felt celebrated.

Fun times Mom always worked to make life fun. She sewed cowboy outfits, a Zorro cape, and a GI Joe tent. She made the coolest matching outfits for our vocal group called, “SHALOM." I know,

how '70s! She made a curtain for a drama team, showed me how to deliver puppies, and even taught me to sing harmony and play the guitar. I felt enriched.

When I was 10 and playing

minor hockey on frozen, outdoor rinks on the prairies, I have a distinct image of my mother all bundled up standing beside Dad on the snow bank, clapping and cheering for me. Her presence screamed she backed me.

Send your questions to Dr. Dave at drdave@doingfamilyright.com or visit his website www.doingfamilyright.com Get Dr. Dave’s daily marriage and family tips by following him on Twitter.com/@doingfmilyright

Though she was likely freezing to death with a scarf covering most of her face and cheeks a bright red, she kept on hollering something. Those muffled and unclear noises were undoubtedly in praise of me. I felt supported.

At the end of 4th grade, I was invited to participate in an accelerated learning program – an enriching educational opportunity in every way. It would mean that I would say good-bye to my routine with friends and take the bus everyday across town for 4 years to attend the new school. Most parents would have simply made this decision for their kid. But no, I remember mom trusting me saying, “you go for a walk and think about the pros and cons, and talk to God about it. Whatever you decide, we will stand behind you.”

I will never forget the feeling of “wow, this is my decision”. Oh,

the confidence it instilled. I felt significant.

Teen hood As a teen, the DNA of her greatness continued to surface, as she would lay awake while Dad slept until her youngest son was home safe. It amazed me even then that she couldn’t rest until I was in. I often whispered through a partially open bedroom door, “You awake?” She would reply, “Yes, Honey,” where upon I would often sit on the end of their bed and talk to mom in hushed tones about my evening. I felt secure.

Love to spare Mom was notorious for hugging anyone who came into our house.

Those hugs were mere leftovers of the barrage of embraces we willingly sustained living with her.

She even welcomed in and loved

the members of those religious sects that go door-to-door. I swear she hugged them, too, when they left. She still hugged all my friends that I brought home from college. I was hugged to death my whole life. I felt loved.

Faith and more Finally, I remember mom as a lady who lived what she believed. Her faith was not confined to Sunday mornings. The difference mom loved to make in her world exploded every day of the week. It was like she either got her orders straight from God each morning or He was actually whispering in her ear about what to do next. What touched me most was our morning routine right through high school. I didn’t get out of the house without her talking to God about me. There’s nothing like a faith so real. I felt prayed for.

Lessons What should you do with my reminiscing? Learn with me. So many of the things mom did for me pale beside what they did in me. Her actions shaped me. It is likely true for your mother, too.

Why not make it a Happy Mother’s Day by thanking your mother for the impact she had on you?

After all, her DNA is in you.

“A wife and mother of noble character who can find? She watches over the affairs of her household. Her children arise and call her blessed; her husband he praises her: ‘Many women do noble things, but you surpass them all.’ Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised. Honor her for all that her hands have done, and let her works bring her praise.”

(Proverbs 31) 

Friends and Neighbors | May 2011

Community Pulse If you have a positive photo of community interest, send it to community@highroadmagazine.com and we might include it in a future issue of The High Road.

0 SUpporting GMH The Triple J Group was a sponsor for the Guam Memorial Hospital Volunteers Association's 43rd Annual Charity Ball. A check for $2,500 was presented recently.

Pictured from left to right are GMH Volunteers Association Members: Linda Simon, Jam Maravilla, Carn Amparo, Dorothy Borlas, Jeff Jones (President & COO, Triple J Group), Lulu Duenas, Jay Jones (Senior Vice President, Triple J Group), Nicole Woo, Pat Muna, and Evelina McDonald.

[ SMOKING WHEELS: Members of the Guam Racing Federation announce the program for the weekend of racing lined up for the 2011 Shell V-Power Smokin Wheels event which took place on April 15 – 17 at the Guam Raceway Park in Yigo. Left to Right: Henry Simpson, General Manager, of the Guam Racing Federation, Joe “JQ” Quichocho; Shane Vizenor (back in green shirt), Driver of Lil Nasty; Leo Kuether (in white), Driver of Fat Girl; and Tom Akigami, Marketing Manager of the Guam Racing Federation.

[ Distinguished Alumni: Dr. Anita Borja Enriquez has been named the 2011 Distinguished Alumnus of Guam Community College. Enriquez’ award was announced during the third annual GCC Distinguished Alumni Award luncheon in GCC’s Multipurpose Auditorium. Dr. Enriquez is the Dean of the School of Business and Public Administration at the University of Guam, and a 1981 graduate of the former GCC Vo-Tech High School. The Distinguished Alumni Award recognizes graduates of the former GCC High School, or Guam Community College’s postsecondary, GED, licensing or apprentice programs, that have demonstrated the highest level of professional achievement and service to the community.

Left to Right: Al Yanger, brother of nominee Col. Edgar Yanger; Dr. Mary Okada, GCC President; Jeffrey John Ibanez, 2010 Distinguished Alumnus; Mary English, 2009 Distinguished Alumnus; Dr. Anita Borja Enriquez, 2011 Distinguished Alumnus; Lt. Gov. Ray Tenorio; Rose Onedera, nominee; Emily Concepcion, mother of nominee Julie Concepcion Cruz; Dr. Kimberly Bersamin, nominee; Phil Ada, 2009 Distinguished Alumnus; and Lolita Reyes, Asst. Director, GCC Development & Alumni Relations Office.

Reflections | May 2011

Millie Lujan Heading the Sanctuary family

By Frank Whitman

It is fitting that Millie Lujan’s photo appears on the cover of this motherhood edition of The High Road.

After all, her adult life has been spent helping children develop into productive adults, assisting parents and children in resolving family issues and getting along, not to mention the rewards and trials of raising her own children.

In addition to being a mother of three, Lujan is the executive director of Sanctuary Inc.,

the private nonprofit organization that provides temporary shelter, family counseling, crisis intervention, drug-dependency treatment, and other outreach, education and prevention programs for the youth on Guam.

“We’re an alternative to the juvenile justice system,” she says.

“We’re not a detention facility; everything is voluntary. The kids have to want to be here.”

Lujan’s involvement with Sanctuary has special meaning to her.

In 1997, her eldest daughter, Rosene, was 24 years old and a caseworker with Sanctuary’s transitional living program when she was diagnosed with cancer.

In order to care for Rosene, including staying with her in Hawaii while she was being treated, Millie Lujan took her retirement from the Department of Education. Rosene lost the fight against

the disease in August of that year. “Losing a child is really the worst thing ever,” she says.

Millie, looking for something to keep her occupied as she coped with her loss, was approached by one of Rosene’s co-workers about applying for a position with a new parental assistance program at Sanctuary. “[The coworker] said, ‘You’d be perfect; You have experience working with families,’” Millie says. “So I put in an application.” She spent the next two years working as an outreach worker with the parental assistance program.

“A lot of [working with parents] was like therapy for me,” Lujan says. “When I was facilitating parenting sessions and listening to the parents and some of the issues that they were facing with their kids, I would share my own experience and talk about how the things they were going through were minor compared to losing a child.”

After a short hiatus from Sanctuary to work at DOE, Lujan was asked to return to Sanctuary as project director of the parental assistance program, which she did. Since then she has run the organization’s outreach and prevention program, written grants, headed the accreditation committee and became previous Executive Director Sarah Thomas Nededog’s “right hand.” When Nededog resigned to run for a seat in the Guam Legislature in 2010, Lujan was hired to take the position.

Lujan’s family-work balance became more challenging when her schedule changed as she began her 8 a.m. to 5 p.m. — and sometimes later — job at Sanctuary.

“I’m really blessed that my husband Sonny is very helpful. He’s retired and focuses on taking care of our daughter right now.”

The Lujans’ other daughter, Renee, is disabled and has no self-help skills. “All of her care is on us."

Renee spends her mornings at a program at Catholic Social Services and is bused home afterward. “[Sonny] drops her in the morning and then he’s there at

[ Hair and make-up by Kimberly and Sapphire, Hairdresser by Kimberly.

two when she gets home.”

The Sanctuary programs assist young people, usually in ways most often expected of the family. “Most of the kids that come to us are victims of some type of abuse,” Lujan says. “With some of the kids, both parents are deceased; one or both parents are incarcerated. Many of them are wards of the state; they’re [Child Protective Services] clients.”

Ideally, the youth will be reunited with his or her family.

The organization operates three shelters in addition to other programs.

The Coed Emergency Shelter is for youths 12 to 17 years old who may remain for up to 30 days.

“Sometimes parents say, ‘Before I take them into [Department of Youth Affairs] I’d like to see if this is somewhere that they can go for a little while so that we can figure things out and we need you guys to help us.’”

Lujan says. “So we work with the youth until they are able to reunify with the family.” The shelter may also serve as a temporary haven while CPS looks for a more permanent placement.

The Transitional Living Program is for those aged 16 to 21 for whom family reunification is not an option. Clients may stay up to 18 months. They are taught independent living skills so they will be prepared for living on their own.

Sagan Na’Homlo is Sanctuary’s drug rehabilitation program for ages 12 through 18. It is the only residential treatment facility for youth in Micronesia and offers up to six months of intense treatment.

Heading the Sanctuary Family has shown Lujan the measure of being a successful mother.

The best part of motherhood is “when you see the successes that [your kids] have — the milestones in their lives, their graduation from high school, graduation from college, getting their first job,” Lujan says. “That makes you proud because you know that they can survive on their own, that you’ve done what you were supposed to do.”

Reflections | Mothers | May 2011

Lessons I learned from MOM

By Gennette Quan Simmons

In 1945, Meryll Frost, quarterback for Dartmouth College and one the most courageous athletes of the era said, “They say behind every great man there's a woman.While I'm not a great man, there's a great woman behind me.”

Frost may have coined the phrase, but he is certainly not alone in its use.

The High Road sought out a few upstanding men in our community and asked them to share their thoughts on how their moms have impacted their lives, and lessons they’ve learned from these “great women.”

Frank Blas Jr. Senator, 31st Guam Legislature, Son of Ernestina "Tina" Tenorio Blas describe your MOM

Passionate. My mother loves God, and everything she does is centered around Him. [ Left to right: Augustine Torres (father), Ryan Torres, Rose Torres (wife), and Rita F. Torres (mother). This was taken 2 years ago at his son Ryder's christening.

Ryan F. Torres Vice-President, Store Manager, Macy's Son of Rita Fejeran Torres describe your mother

Determined. Ever since I was 7 years old, my mother would train me how to clean up every part of the house from the bathroom, bedroom, and to the kitchen.

Each of my brothers would share in the chores in, and around the house. The work was never-ending, and I learned to use my time productively.

HOW ARE YOU ALIKE?

The characteristics we both share are determination and a strong work ethic.

What is your fondest memory of your mother?

There are a lot of memories of my mom. The fondest is being told that I will be an altar boy for Mt. Carmel church. There was no negotiation, as it was expected since my brothers all did it, 10 THE HIGH ROAD MAY 2011

and she was a Eucharistic Minister for the church. Another fond memory is when my mom, brothers, and I would all work together to clean the house every Friday.

The best advice

The best advice my mother gave me was to be respectful to everyone I met. This will give you the trust and loyalty of your friends, family, and colleagues.

How would you say your mom stands apart from other moms?

I would say my mom stands out from other moms as she had seven boys plus a first cousin (Ronald) whom she each taught to be responsible and respectful.

How has your mother’s guidance influenced who you are today?

My mother's guidance was a big influence in the way she approached whatever challenge she faced. She overcame anything with pride and demonstrated resilience when responding to a crisis.

HOW ARE YOU ALIKE?

Our stubbornness is one. We also think that we're both stern, but we always melt when around children.

What is your fondest memory of your mother?

My fondest memory is a combination of all the years we've had and continue to have. Although, while growing up my mother held a full-time job and was involved in a variety of organizations, she still managed to prepare all our meals, attend to our needs,

help us with homework, get us to where we needed to go, and support us in all we were doing.

Her days started way before my siblings and I were even awake and ended long after we were all asleep. And she hasn't changed.

The best advice

"Before you start something, know what you're starting."

How would you say your mom stands apart from other moms?

I can always trust that even if she and I don't agree with what I'm doing, she'll always be there to assist in any way she can to see that what I'm doing comes to fruition.

BIG LESSONS

My mother loves her family, and although I am not her biological son, she always saw me as her eldest child. While growing up I'll admit that my relationship with her was tumultuous. Despite this, my mother never gave up on me and continued to raise me with always the best of intentions. I've found that in caring and providing for my family today, I've used many of the lessons learned from my mother to do so. But the most significant piece of advice I received from her was the need and insistence to always say; "I love you." In my family, this insistence has evolved to a rule. Now, anytime you leave or before you hang up the phone, the last three words said will always be, "I love you." And in saying it, there's also the expectation of living it. This, I believe, continues to keep my family strong and keeps my life rooted in them.

Ralph Gregory Sablan Business Development Assistant Manager, Guam Economic Development Association; Owner, American Music, Livehouse, and Shoreline; Son of Maryanne Gutierrez Sablan describe your moM

My mom puts that extra special loving touch to everything she does from caring for Dad and our family, to her work, to her cooking and gardening. She sacrifices to give to her loved ones a trait we all admire so much.

HOW ARE YOU ALIKE?

We have diligence to follow through and persevere, are family oriented, musical and artistic, have a good sense of humor, energetic and have green thumbs.

What is your fondest

memory of your mother?

When I was 5 years old, we went to Saipan for a family trip. At the hotel pool, I jumped off the diving board at the deep end but I did not know how to swim. My mom jumped in and saved me from drowning. Saving my life was a big deal, but if you know my mom and water, that’s a bigger deal!

The best advice

The best advice my mother ever gave me was to finish school.

That is really the basis of where I am today.

How would you say your mom stands apart from other moms?

My mom is a real go-getter and a people person but she really has a good balance between that personality and that fact that her family is the priority in her life.

How has your mother’s guidance influenced who you are today?

My mom has really instilled in

me how God and religion are important and need to be in my life.

She made sure I went to good Catholic schools and attended church.

To be quite honest, I may not be the best practicing Catholic but the ideals, morals and traditions are woven into my moral fiber and are reflected in the way I conduct myself in family life and in business.

BIG LESSONS

My mom leads by example. She has shown me through her life and other instances that hard work and a good planning will lead to success. My mom has supported my father throughout his career and helped him become the man he is today. She also supports me in all my endeavors and hopefully I can follow in those footsteps of success. 

CRAFT a Corsage

By Scott Parker, DDS

“Why should I visit the dentist? My teeth feel great! Plus, it costs too much.”

When the time to wear or give a corsage rolls around, you can be well-equipped to create one on your own. Here’s how in four simple steps.

You will need: • Flowers (in this case, we show you how to work with roses or orchids) • Greens • Wire (No. 24 wire is a good weight, but No. 28 is better for more delicate flowers) • Floral tape (1/2-inch wide for wrapping the stems and wires; it can be green, brown, or a harmonizing color) • Large-headed corsage pins.

INstructions: 1. Wire blossoms either by sticking the wire through the calyx, the thick green part right underneath the flower, or by poking a wire through the center of the flower.

2. Individual leaves are wired by slipping the wire through the base of the leaf and wrapping it down the stem.

3. After wiring the flowers and leaves, wrap them with tape starting next to the blossom or leaf base.

4. Combine the leaves and the flowers into a corsage. Tie the parts together with wire or tape. Cut the wrapped wire stems and either leave them straight or curl the ends.

Credits: Photography Eugene C. Herrera, arrangements by Jojo Sy-Quimsiam of Diana’s Florist.

These statements echo a common belief that a dentist visit is reserved only for that nagging toothache.

I would like to challenge this belief because like much in life, we take care of things that we value. This applies to that shiny car, your house, your marriage, and yes, your teeth. Let us consider the value of teeth. A person’s smile is a defining, expressive and beautiful part of the face. Being able to proudly smile is important to personal confidence—be it in a graduation photograph, job interview, or a business presentation. At your next meal, consider the range of culinary delights that would be missed without healthy teeth. As you pick up your phone, appreciate the ease in which you talk—something that yes, your teeth play an important role in. With proper care, these teeth can continue to serve you throughout a lifetime. You may ask, “I know about brushing my teeth, but what else do my teeth need?”

Teeth need cleaning and rest. No they do not get tired but they get dirty! Bacteria are responsible for cavities. Bacteria thrive in an acidic environment, which is exactly what eating and drinking (anything but water) creates in the mouth. This is why brushing after meals is important. Also, try to limit eating or drinking between meals—let your teeth rest! As far as cleaning: brush teeth at least twice a day for two minutes, and pull out the floss daily. Finally, even champion toothbrushers cannot clean everything, so schedule regular dental visits. This includes cleanings and exams with screening for early detection of tooth and gum disease. Following these steps will help keep your beautiful smile healthy and lasting for years to come. 

A person’s smile is a defining, expressive and beautiful part of the face.

Make Your Appointment Today!

648-2553

Bright Ideas | May 2011

By Deane Jessee-Jones

Life Lessons I Learned

from My Kids

I was lucky before I had kids.

I knew “everything” anyone could know about child rearing. As a teen, I had been the neighborhood baby whisperer; the only one who parents could call for miles to silent their crying children. I had worked as a nanny, spent countless hours in classrooms and camps teaching. I had degrees in Psychology, Child Development, and Counseling. I was well versed in all current research and knew that with proper scheduling and discipline, parenting was easy. I proudly told parents at conferences and meetings what they needed to do to get their kids in line. I knew it all … until I had my first child.

Jake was born backwards, not upside down, but backwards, as though coming into the world saying, “I will do it my way.”

He then proceeded to have multiple allergies. The greatest of which was a dairy allergy that brought on unbearable colic. He cried, and cried, and cried.

I never knew a baby could cry and vomit so much. It was this initiation into motherhood that woke me from my “dogmatic slumber.”

Babies weren’t easy. Jake never followed any book.

He did everything his own way.

He walked and talked and did everything Jake’s way. He punched a hole in the wall, when put in timeout. He screamed and cried and fought me, and I thought, “I have no idea how to parent.” But then I learned something from Jake that I never knew I was missing. I found patience, an undying patience that somehow could stand strong in the middle of his outbursts.

Figuring that one child was all I could handle, I was done. But

14 THE HIGH ROAD MAY 2011

Mother Nature and antibiotics have a way with playing with birth control and lo and behold, I had number two. Thankfully, Jenna was a happy, easy baby. She didn’t ever cry, but then again she kept forgetting to breathe and spent the first six weeks of her life recovering from prematurity. She came around though and taught me

how to laugh. She taught me to have fun, and play, and mostly how to just love. She loved everything and everyone. She

has never met a stranger. Her happiness was contagious, and she showed me the joy I had been missing.

Deane Jessee-Jones lives with her husband, Jay and three children: Jake, Jenna, and Jeremy in Mangilao. She works as an Educational Therapist and Consultant for Brain Builders Guam and Saipan. Send questions or comments to: brainbuilding@gmail.com. For more information on training programs available in Guam and Saipan go to: http://guam.processingskills.com.

Having a boy and a girl, I figured our family was complete. But once again, fate intervened and I had number three.

Jeremy a man of his own, so creative and smart, but so frustrating. And from him yet another lesson, that sometimes looking the wrong way or being distracted you actually see what matters. Jeremy is inattentive and watches butterflies instead of soccer balls on the field. He is in his own place. He once actually walked out of his own shoes while walking in line at school, and never realized it. But, by living with this, I have learned that sometimes there are things on the sidewalk worth looking at, and if I don’t slow down and lose a little focus now and then, life will pass me by. Jeremy revels in the world around him. He sees beauty and questions the world and what is in it. He has taught me there is no bug, raindrop, or bubble that isn’t worth stopping for. Everything should

be treasured, even the distractions.

So, three great lessons in three little lives: patience, joy, and reverence.

In addition, I found renewed faith in a God that has a sense of humor about giving you the exact kids you need to learn life’s lessons. I found humility in the lesson that I don’t and won’t know everything about children, especially my own. But, I have to say that the most important thing my kids have taught me is what an amazing mom I have. Because until you have kids yourself, you don’t realize what your mom did for you: the sacrifices, the late nights, the undying love … So although I now proudly realize I know little about parenting, I am much wiser about life. ■

If you’re reading this, so are your potential customers.

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Call Greg Esplana at 648-6081 or Janet Kerrebrock at 777-6700 today!

Culture Shift | March 2011 Roundtable Talk | May 2011

SOCIAL STUDIES

Lt. Emily M. Dover Health care administrator U.S. Naval Hospital Guam

Petty Officer 2nd Class Elizabeth Patterson Hospital corpsman U.S. Naval Hospital Guam

Lt. Denise Boggs-Wilkerson General medical officer U.S. Naval Hospital Guam

In addition to having a holiday for Moms, May is also Military Appreciation Month.

Petty Officer 2nd Class Sonya Gordon Hospital corpsman and surgical technician U.S. Naval Hospital Guam

EVERY MONTH, we invite everyday islanders to have a conversation about the topic of the month.

Here’s what they said.

What are the special challenges of being an active-duty service member and a mother?

Dover: The biggest challenge is having a healthy balance between the work demands and spending a significant amount of quality time with my children. Work demands are not strictly confined to normal working hours and thus can affect family time. Having the support of my husband and family has been the key to my success at managing this challenge.

Patterson: The biggest

challenge to me is managing my time so that I spend as much time as possible with my daughter and still get the job done and done right.

Gordon: The special challenges of being an active-duty service member and a single mother is juggling two full-time jobs—sailor and mother. The possibility that I can be gone for several months at any time is always at the back of my mind.

My time is limited and can take away from the kids and their quality time and extracurricular activities that they may want to participate in. Also, I am always second guessing myself and wondering if I give my job and my kids equal attention—a fair balance.

Boggs-Wilkerson: The single most unique challenge to being an active-duty mother in my mind is trying to

help my children through the regular changes that we are required to undergo. Deployments, [permanent duty-station changes], and extended [temporary assignment] periods that require my children to adapt are difficult. It makes finding "family traditions" difficult and as the children get older and are learning their place in this world, they lose the opportunity to have lifelong friendships that build year upon year.

What are the positive aspects of raising a child while being in the military?

Dover: The main one for

me is the ability to expose my children to various people and cultures. I hope this experience will enable them to become adults who are accepting of all people regardless of the differences they may identify in others.

Patterson: The support and understanding that I get from my chain of command is like nothing I would get in the civilian world. The Navy is there to help when I need it.

16 THE HIGH ROAD MAY 2011

"They are able to experience how small the world is and how the differences help to make it a more beautiful place." — Boggs-Wilkerson Gordon: The positive

aspects of raising children while being in the military are the benefits such as MWR's various

programs, amenities, medical, dental, etc.; being able to expose them to different cultures and regions, and most impor-

tantly, giving them exposure to the military and a positive role model.

Boggs-Wilkerson: Raising children in the military, I am able to provide them opportunities to be totally engrossed in new cultures and places that most people have never seen.

They are able to experience how small the world is and how the differences help to make it a more beautiful place. 

Transformations| May 2011

By MaryAnn Pangelinan

If Lou Farfan can boost her metabolism and overhaul her body then any woman can. She is living proof that age or getting older can no longer be used as an excuse when it comes to getting a youthful body. What’s her secret?

Lou realized how important it was to change her eating habits and incorporate resistance training to help reverse the signs of aging, or to slow it down at the least.

Her major struggles included: 1) Obesity, 2) Hypertension/high blood pressure, and 3) Low energy levels. Her primary physician suggested she enroll in a weight loss & exercise program considering her family history of high blood and not to mention Lou’s sister who died at the age of 42 from diabetes and heart failure. “Soda was my sister’s favorite. It was her coffee, her lunch, and her dinner. She will not drink anything else and sometimes will not eat anything and just drink sodas all day,” Lou recalls.

Lou is a mother, a grandmother, a wife, and

1

a career woman, and most especially an active member of Paradise Fitness since 2009. She continues to weight train, do cardio, and eat healthy by paying careful attention to calories and the ratios of carbohydrate, protein, and fat that she consumes daily.

“To mothers who are obese, get on the bandwagon and do something about your health. Do not leave your children, other half, or parents behind,” Lou advises.

At the age of 52, she managed to drop her weight from 148 to 120 pounds. She credits Tony Morrison for helping her with her nutrition and teaching her how to fit in what she likes to eat, into her meal plans. When she started, she was a size 10 and today she is a size 4.

It’s no secret; resistance training, cardio activity,

LEG EXTENSION MACHINE Sit back on the bench with lower legs under the pads. Hold the handle for support. Using your quads, lift the weight by extending your knees and flexing your quads. Slowly return to starting position and repeat.

2

and healthy eating is a must to overhaul your body. Your leg muscles alone are enough to reboot your metabolism and turn you into a fatburning machine. Lou demonstrates 7 basic, fundamental leg exercises that are built to never fail regardless of your goals.

Here’s Tony Morrison’s lower body routine de- signed for real women who want a real leg training workout. Perform the following exercises one exercise at a time; 4 sets of 15-20 reps, not including warm-ups.

“This is the most standard and basic routine anyone who picks up resistance training should know how to perform. Legs are the first body part everyone should learn. Once you perfect these moves, you should be good to go,” added Morrison. 

LYING LEG CURL MACHINE

Lie on the leg curl machine with your lower legs under the pads. Hold the handle for support. Using your hamstrings, lift the weight towards your glutes. Slowly return to starting position and repeat the movement.

3

LEG PRESS MACHINE Lay back on the leg press machine. Place your feet shoulder width apart on the platform. Lower the weight while keeping your legs parallel to each other. Bring your knees close to your chest and use your quads, hamstrings, and glutes to press the weight back to starting position. Repeat.

18 THE HIGH ROAD MAY 2011

4

6 BEFORE

DUMBBELL STIFF LEGGED DEAD LIFT Grasp the bar shoulder width apart or wider. Stand shoulder width apart with your knees slightly bent. Bend over keeping your back straight and arms fully extended. Pull the bar up toward your bellybutton then slowly lower to starting position and repeat the movement.

OUTER THIGH MACHINE

7

Sit with your back firmly against the pad and your legs positioned inside the pads. Adjust the machine to bring your knees close together for the starting position.

While holding the bar handles, push your legs as far apart as you comfortably can then slowly return to starting position. Repeat the movement.

AFTER

5

INNER THIGH MACHINE

Grasp the bar shoulder width apart or wider. Stand shoulder width apart with your knees slightly bent.

Bend over keeping your back straight and arms fully extended. Pull the bar up toward your bellybutton then slowly lower to starting position and repeat the movement.

STANDING CALF-RAISE MACHINE Stand on the calf raise machine placing your shoulders below the pads and your feet on the foot panel. Your weight must be supported above the balls of your feet.

While keeping your knees straight, raise the weight up and flex your calf muscles then slowly drop the weight down to feel a stretch in your calves. Repeat.

MaryAnn Pangelinan is president of the Guam National Physique Committee. She has a B.A. in Education from the University of Hawaii at Manoa. Pangelinan is an International Federation of Bodybuilding Guam Gold Medalist. She is Tony Morrison’s Nutrition & Weight Loss Program Coordinator. Morrison has a B.S. in Criminal Justice from the University of Guam and is a Sports Nutrition Specialist. He has been a strength and conditioning coach for over a decade.

Contact MaryAnn at (671)929-0963 for more information on Tony Morrison's weight loss, nutrition, and strength & conditioning training programs.

Photography: Eugene C. Herrera, Special thanks to Paradise Fitness Center

See Clearly | May 2011

A mother's eyes How VISION GETS ALTERED DURING PREGNANCY

By Peter Lombard, M.D.

A variety of physiological changes occur during pregnancy, and the eyes are not exempt from these changes.

Pregnancy can cause a number of systemic conditions that can affect one’s vision.

Medical conditions such as diabetes and hypertension may be exacerbated during pregnancy, with potential changes to the visual system.

Here we will briefly review some changes to the ocular system during pregnancy, and discuss symptoms that should prompt a visit to your optometrist or ophthalmologist.

Dryness is a common eye symptom during pregnancy, particularly in the third trimester. The cause of this is multifactorial but mostly related to decreased sensitivity of the front of the eye, with a resultant decrease in tear production. If your eyes have a dry, gritty or sandy feeling to them, this is probably related to dryness. These symptoms may be worse when outdoors, or when engaged in activities such as watching television, using the computer, or reading. During episodes of dryness you may also notice blurry vision, or even a paradoxical increase in tearing as a response to the eye irritation. Contact lens wearers may have much more difficulty during pregnancy because of dryness, and may be at increased risk of contact-lens related infections of the cornea.

The simplest solution for mild 20 THE HIGH ROAD MAY 2011

symptoms is to carry some quality artificial tears with you, and to apply these to your eyes prior to performing the activities mentioned above, or whenever you are symptomatic. Other treatment options are available from your eye care specialist for more serious cases of dry eyes.

You may notice a change in your glasses prescription during pregnancy due to swelling of the cornea and a resultant change in its shape. If this occurs, the change is usually mild, and may vary over the course of the pregnancy. A new prescription will probably be unnecessary except in extreme circumstances.

Cloasma is a brown, spotty skin color change around the eyelids that can develop during pregnancy. This pigmentary change is probably related to elevated hormone levels, and tend to fade after delivery. No treatment is necessary.

One particular change in the eye can be considered beneficial. It has been shown that intraocular eye pressure decreases during pregnancy. This may provide a transient benefit for those that are being treated for glaucoma. There is an unfortunate lack of data regarding the safety of many glaucoma eye drops in pregnant and breastfeeding women.

Those that require treatment need to consult closely with their ophthalmologist about treatment during pregnancy.

Pressure inside the eye should not be misconstrued with systemic blood pressure. About 5% of pregnant women will develop hypertension. In some cases this can affect vision, with blurriness being the most likely complaint. High blood pressure can cause swelling of the optic nerve, or small hemorrhages of the retina. Patients may no-

tice blurriness or blind spots in their vision if this occurs.

Pregnant women are at risk of pre-eclampsia, which carries a number of health risks including severe high blood pressure, protein in the urine, and seizures. Visual symptoms such as flashing lights may indicate an impending seizure. Your primary care or obstetric provider should be screening for pre-eclampsia and review the symptoms related to this condition.

Diabetic retinopathy is a diabetic complication that damages the small blood vessels in the back of the eye. With exposure to high blood sugar levels and high blood pressure, these important blood vessels can become leaky or incompetent, and lead to decreased oxygenation to the retina. Due to increased metabolic and hormonal demands, pregnancy can induce the onset of diabetic retinopathy, or cause the condition to worsen in those that already have it. The more severe the degree of diabetic retinopathy before pregnancy, the greater the risk of worsening during preg-

nancy. Prenatal counseling and testing, and tight glucose control are paramount to avoiding this potentially vision-threatening complication. Even mild amounts of diabetic retinopathy during pregnancy should be monitored by an ophthalmologist, who can recommend treatment when it becomes necessary. This may come in the form of laser treatment to the back of the eye, or in the form of injections of medicine into the eye. In some cases surgery may be advised. While these treatment options may seem dramatic, large studies continue to demonstrate they save vision!

Other less common but serious eye conditions may develop. Besides general blurriness, pregnant women should also seek eye care for double vision, distortion of shapes, or headaches with vision changes. Prompt evaluation, referral, and treatment may prevent permanent changes to your eyesight. As always, ask your eye care specialist about further questions or for points of clarification. 

Peter Lombard, M.D. comes from a family with strong medical ties to Guam. He is a Lieutenant Commander in the US Navy and was recently assigned to Naval Hospital Guam as the only military ophthalmologist on the island.

He attended the US Naval Academy for undergraduate training, and completed medical school at Johns Hopkins University. The statements expressed here are his own and do not necessarily represent the views of the US Navy or US Government.

Ask The Bone Doctor | May 2011

Is it possible to break something with overexertion?

By Sean Fitzsimmons, M.D. Hi Dr. Fitzsimmons, Lately I’ve been experiencing an aching pain in my left shoulder even when I’m at rest.

I think it all started when I did some lateral arm raises with a pair of dumbbells which were probably too heavy. How do I know if I’ve broken a bone?

For the most part, I can function throughout the day, but the pain just comes and goes and, I can’t perform the same exercise without it hurting.

— Thomas Dear Thomas, This is a difficult question to answer without giving a general answer, but I will do my best to shed light on your problem. It takes a good amount of force to break a bone so I think it would

be unlikely that you have broken something, but the only way to be sure would be to get an x-ray.

When patients have shoulder pain it is often difficult to diagnose the correct condition even for experienced providers. Young patients tend to get labral tears when they injure their shoulders. For example, when a young patient dislocates their shoulder they almost always tear their labrum. In less traumatic events, like yours, patients can tear the superior labrum (the top of the labrum). This causes pain with overhead activity and can be treated with medicine, thera-

py, and sometimes injections.

This type of tear may require repair depending on the patient’s goals and their response to non-operative treatment.

Older patients tend to tear their rotator cuff when they have pain after lifting heavy objects or after falls. This also can manifest in pain with overhead activity and sometimes weakness. Tendonitis (or inflammation of the rotator cuff) can occur after overusing the shoulder. Of course there are many other conditions that can cause shoulder pain such as a frozen shoulder (stiff shoulder) or minor sprains and strains.

The main way to differentiate all of these problems is by taking a good history from the patient, doing a thorough physical exam, and ordering the appropriate imaging studies (such as x-ray and/or MRI). If your pain is significant and has not

resolved with rest and time I would recommend that you have your shoulder checked by a doctor who is comfortable with shoulder problems.

Thank you for your question and I hope this helps. 

Sean Fitzsimmons, M.D. has completed an orthopaedic surgery residency at Mount Sinai Hospital and an orthopaedic sports medicine fellowship at Lenox Hill Hospital, both in New York City. During his fellowship he worked with the New York Jets, New York Islanders, and Division I and II college soccer and basketball teams. He has training in the latest arthroscopic treatments for shoulder problems and knee ligament reconstructions. His office is in the Guam Medical Plaza in Tamuning. If you have any questions for Dr. Sean Fitzsimmons, you can send them to questions@highroadmagazine.com.

Style | May 2011

The Creation of Great Style Begins with a Mother’s Touch

By Hernalin Analista

Mothers have the innate ability to provide great things for the betterment and stability of their families— love, guidance, and nourishing meals.

They do so much for us, that it’s only fitting that they should also be allowed to take care of themselves.

Many moms take great pleasure in dressing up and exploring the latest trends in fashion.

In this section, we’re proud to showcase several stylish mothers, their fashion sense and what works best for their form.

[ Epic Proportions

Although juggling motherhood and a career can be a challenge, Becky Espinosa manages to pull off a put together look by understanding the importance of playing with proportions. Here she wears a knit cardigan and glittery tank by INC and a black high-waisted skirt by Splendid. The overall outfit works to highlight her figure-cinching her waist and elongating her legs.

0 ELEVATE THE BASICS

Mags Sablan’s preference is in the details. She aims to elevate the basics by pairing dark wash skinny jeans by Seven with a silk shirt by Michael Kors and a striped long-sleeved cardigan

by Charlotte. The neutral palette is an ideal backdrop for creative accessories like a classic pearl necklace (Charter Club) and eye-catching heels.

Style | May 2011

[ GO GRAPHIC Caroline Sablan shows that going graphic and wearing bold prints and colors have its merits.

The structured lines of the form fitting white jacket by Studio M works well with the large floral print umpire dress by the same brand.

The orange bangle bracelet and gold chain necklace brighten her look and create a moodlifting effect.

Styling: Hernalin Analista Clothing and Accessories: Macy’s Photography: Eugene C. Herrera Venue: Hilton Guam Resort & Spa

0 CURVE CONTROL Lita Magdael manages to stay radiant in this printed wrap dress and ruffled jacket by Ralph Lauren. Lita has discovered that the secret to narrowing her curves is to wear pieces that contain a bit of stretch. To do so will avoid pulling and pinching around problem areas and will create a more flattering, custom fit appearance.

Lita’s look is completed with a pair of round gold earrings by Kenneth Cole.

Wellness | May 2011

A new generation of caregivers works to balance their own lives and the needs of their elderly parents. Story and Photographs by Juvy Gao-ay Cariño In 2006, Christine Guevara Aquinde made the lifechanging decision to drop out of college to take care of her aging parents. The mother of three also was expecting her fourth child.

0 GRATITUDE: Christine Guevara Aquinde holds her father Restituto Guevara.

Aquinde was caregiver to her late mother Lilila as well. it. I would be too busy with worrying about my parents and how they were doing.”

NEW GENERATION

Her mother Lilila was diagnosed with dementia—a degenerative mental condition that also affected her mom’s motor functions until she was bedridden.

Lilila passed away two years later—a day after Mother's Day—at age 77.

Aquinde currently cares for her 83-yearold father Restituto, who has prostate cancer. He also breathes with the help of an oxygen tank 24 hours a day.

Aquinde is one of an increasing number of adults who are taking on the responsibility of keeping their elderly parents alive and healthy.

It’s a role that's mentally draining and physically demanding. It's also a calling based on love, gratitude, and duty.

26 THE HIGH ROAD MAY 2011

“I do this because they sacrificed for me [growing up], so now it’s my turn to sacrifice for my parents,” she says.

Aquinde is a full-time caregiver. She shares duties with her brother Dante who cares for their father at night and during the weekends. Aquinde’s three older children—aged 12, 16, and 19— also help.

For Shirley Estoy, facing the responsibility of being a full-time caregiver was not an easy role to accept.

Two years ago, she was enjoying a carefree life in Japan as an English teacher. She had been there for several years, but her elderly parents were pleading for her to come home.

Now, Estoy’s days are spent

cleaning, feeding, and driving her 81-year-old father, Ruddy, to dialysis. He has end-stage renal disease, diabetes, and hypertension. He’s had triple bypass surgery, wears a pacemaker, and has pins connected to his hip.

While her 61-year-old mom Gregoria also shares the caregiver responsibility, she is a breast cancer survivor with her own health concerns and relies on Shirley to do the more physicallydemanding duties.

“In the beginning it was an extremely bitter pill to swallow, but ultimately, I knew it was the right decision to come back to Guam,” Estoy says. “I could have kept on working and advancing my career, but deep down I knew I wouldn't be putting my heart into

Both Aquinde and Estoy are a part of a new generation of caregivers—daughters of a growing population of Guam’s elderly. In 2009, Guam had about 19,025 elderly over 60 years old or 10.6% of the population, according to estimates from the Census Bureau International Data Base.

With a projected growth rate of 5% each year, the island may have an elderly population of over 31,000 by 2020.

Nation-wide, 66% of caregivers are women, according to the National Alliance for Caregiving.

Anastascia Mesa, a social worker with the Family Caregiver Support Program at the University of Guam, says she’s seen that women are the most common caregivers for the northern part of Guam—mainly wives and daughters.

And, Mesa says, for many of these new caregivers the most important lesson to learn about Mesa

]BELOW: Shirley Estoy feeds her father Ruddy during a recent stay at Guam Memorial Hospital. being an effective caregiver is to take care of yourself.

SELF-CARE "Statistically, there are lots of caregivers that pass on before the care-recipient because they don't take care of themselves,” Mesa says. “They neglect their medical needs—we have some clients who go years without seeing a doctor because their main focus is the care-recipient. Within the past two or three years, we've had about four caregivers die be-

fore their care-recipient."

Aquinde’s first year as a caregiver was challenging, often forcing her to neglect her personal needs over those of her parents’. For the first time, she learned to change her mom’s adult diapers and give her baths—a task that required her to carry her mom out of the tub even as her growing pregnant stomach was limiting her movements. She was in a state constant nausea throughout all nine months of her pregnancy, as well.

“I even had a lack of sleep be-

cause I’d worry about them.”

Estoy also experienced a similar case of tunnel vision.

She says there just wasn’t any time to think about herself. For the first year or so, her dad was in such bad condition that the doctors were preparing them for the worst.

“I devoted a lot of time and energy for him to get better. I didn't have any time for myself, and it was just so break-a-person-down stressful.”

According to the 2006 research, “Assessment of Family Caregivers: A Research Perspective,” 40- 70% of family caregivers have clinically significant symptoms of depression.

Estoy admitted that she didn't even let her friends know she'd returned to Guam during the first year she became a caregiver because she didn't feel like socializing.

SOMEONE TO LEAN ON

"I could have kept on working and advancing my career, but deep down I knew I wouldn't be putting my heart into it. I would be too busy with worrying about my parents and how they were doing." - Estoy

Whether assisting caregivers with their elderly family members or by providing caregivers an outlet to vent their frustration, the UOG Family Caregiver Support Program can help lessen the stress of a caregiver’s responsibilities and possibly prevent depression.

Mesa, who provided care for her Continued on Page 40 1

Reflections | Mothers | May 2011

A Mother's Day Remembrance Reflecting on a mom's life well lived

By Frank Whitman

It’s not unusual for someone my age to lose his mother, but that doesn’t make it easier.

That void was punched into my life Oct. 19, 2009 when my mother was killed in a car accident.

Living as far away from my mother as I have for the past 35 years it might be hard to think of myself as being close to her. I certainly never wrote, called or visited as often as I should have. But her values, character, and love have always been my internal guiding light.

She had raised us on her own after our father died in 1960 when Mom was pregnant with their sixth child and I, the oldest, was six years old. Money was tight, but Mom ran things on a strict budget and managed to afford what she thought was important— a good home and a Catholic education.

Mom valued the educational aspect of travel and so we traveled. Her most ambitious trip was in 1968, when she packed the six of us, aged seven to 14, into a station wagon, and spent 10 weeks driving across the country. We visited—moving from campground to campground according to schedule and on budget—Mt. Rushmore, Disneyland, the Grand Canyon and dozens of other attractions on her list.

When our youngest sister started kindergarten, Mom returned to school, got her master’s degree and then taught in the Buffalo public schools until her retirement.

Having a less-than-angelic brood of youngsters pretty much precluded remarriage until 1977 — when we were grown.

In 1984, she and Bill, her husband, moved to Lebanon, N.H. Despite her age, Mom’s death at 80 was particularly unexpected as she had shown no signs of slowing down. A couple of months before, she was one of only three in a group of 10 who hiked all the way to the top of the Angels Landing Trail in Zion National Park, Utah. The others being “too tired or too afraid of the trail,” we were told.

After I made arrangements, with the help of the good people at Continental for my wife, my daughter and me to travel to New Hampshire, the viewing and funeral were scheduled to follow our arrival. My sons also made the trip—Eddie with his wife and two youngest from Fort Campbell, and Billy from Honolulu.

The trip was somber, but I had to smile when I saw the headline across the top of 28 THE HIGH ROAD MAY 2011

[ Barbara Whitman and her son, Frank, hiked to the top of Diamond Head in Honolulu in May 2008, two days after her grandson, Billy, graduated from the University of Hawaii. the front page of the local newspaper — “Lebanon activist Barbara Whitman, 80, killed in I-89 crash.” I don’t know how she would have reacted to the characterization, but she was both active and an activist.

The article included Bill’s reference to her as the “Energizer Bunny” because she kept a schedule that would exhaust someone a fraction of her age. The writer had spoken to family as well as a fellow member of the Upper Valley Household Hazardous Waste Committee and the coordinator of the Kids on the Block disability awareness program in which Mom was a longtime puppeteer.

The paper noted that Mom was on her way to an adult class at nearby Dartmouth College when the accident happened— ever the lifelong learner.

The news article also included the unfortunate initial police report that Mom had been attempting a U-turn across the median on the Interstate when the accident occurred. We all knew how unlikely that was, especially me, as a few years earlier I had reluctantly driven eight miles to the next exit and back to the exit I had missed when she strenuously objected to a shorter, illegal route. It seems much more likely that she had suffered some sudden illness, which the medical examiner agreed was entirely possible but could not be definitively determined.

During the wake, I met members of the Green Mountain Club hiking group, the

United Valley Interfaith Project and her aerobics class. A cousin from North Carolina, in her mid-40s preparing to graduate from law school after a troubled past, told me that Mom had been an inspiration.

“I thought, ‘If Aunt Barbara could do what she did with all those kids, I can do this.’”

While I wanted to express my appreciation to all, I could only sob.

The priests acknowledged Mom’s parish activity — she was a member of the Social Justice Committee among other activities.

And again, I had to smile when they both said they cringed a little when they saw her coming with her clipboard. Apparently, she had recently convinced the pastor to set up a recycling receptacle in the church, but failed to recruit the younger parish priest to walk in the annual Crop Walk anti-hunger march.

I don’t know if it’s better when a loved one’s death is so unexpected. I had last seen Mom at a family reunion a few months earlier and we parted with fond good-byes.

It might have been nice to know that we were saying our farewells for the final time.

However, I have a hard time imagining her growing infirm and having to slow down.

During our visit, my wife and daughter mentioned the beauty of the autumn colors—it was their first time to visit in the fall. Mom would have appreciated that, and would have had us hiking up a mountain for a better view. 

Live Easy | May 2011

Turn criticism into fuel for achieving amazing things in life

By Leo Babauta | www.zenbabits.net

If you’re going to do anything interesting in the world, then criticism is an unavoidable fact.

How to Handle It Gracefully

You’ll be criticized, because you’ll make mistakes, because some will be jealous, because people have opinions about anything interesting, because people want to help you, because some want to drag down those doing anything different.

The trick to navigating the icebergs of criticism is to figure out which are helpful, and steer clear of those that aren’t.

Criticism on Zen Habits Once Zen Habits started to take off — I had 26K subscribers at the end of my first year in 2007 — I received all kinds of criticism.

Many of them were from new readers, who were mostly incredibly positive and encouraging, but who sometimes would leave scathing comments on a post.

I learned a tactic that worked extremely well. If a comment was mean, I’d take a minute to calm myself down, and then ask, “Does this person have a point (despite their rude tone)?”

Then I would respond and thank the commenter for his criticism.

I’d acknowledge their point without being defensive. I’d respond with my reasoning, if I felt I had a point, or if the critic was right I would agree and let them know I was going to change things.

30 THE HIGH ROAD MAY 2011

ute to the world; make the version of the world you want to see.

Go out and do something different. Don’t do things just because everyone else does it. Here’s a secret: Do something amazing, and share it with the world. Criticism can be necessary, but often it is just dragging down the people trying to do amazing things. Don’t let it stop you.

This had a startling effect: the commenter would often respond very positively. Thanking the commenter and acknowledging their point is disarming. People who leave rude comments don’t expect you to listen to them, much less be grateful and empathetic.

I had many of my critics become friends after doing that — I’ve never seen a tactic have better results.

I’ve learned that criticism is a fact of the game. I can respond with anger, or let it stop me from doing things, or I can let it help me. Or accept that it’s there and move on. I choose the last two.

How Not To Handle Criticism Criticism can bring you down if you let it. People get discouraged when faced with criticism, and just give up. That can be understandable, but why let the words of someone having a bad day (or month) stop you from doing something great? What would have happened if Shakespeare had stopped writing the first time an audience member jeered one of his lines? Or if Gandhi had

given up just because the Brits weren’t happy with his ways?

Often people will instead respond to criticism with anger.

They’ll lash out, attack, become defensive and aggressive. You do not attack them, blame them for your mistakes, deny that you made any mistakes, and feed fuel to the fire by compounding your mistakes with more mistakes. It would be so much better just to stay silent.

Do Amazing Things Don’t let criticism stop you from doing anything. If someone tells you that your writing is awful, keep doing it. Make it better.

Study people who do it well. Be great by being honest, by seeking the truth and telling that truth when no one else will.

Create amazing things. Contrib-

Calm yourself down before responding. Always. Responding to a critic in anger is never, ever, ever a good idea. Ask yourself why the criticism was made. Is the person trying to help, to make things better, to help you avoid making mistakes, to suggest positive improvements? Is the person just in a cranky rude mood, having a bad day? Is the person just mean, or jealous? Is there good reason for the criticism?

Thank the person offering the criticism. Sometimes they’re coming from a place of wanting to help you. That takes courage, and is a very generous thing. Be grateful for that. Even when they’re not trying to be helpful, they’ve taken the time to respond to you — and trust me, getting a response is better than absolute silence.

Respond rationally and calmly. Instead of being defensive, be honest. Share your reasons, acknowledge the other person’s points if there’s any validity, and come to a rational conclusion rather than jealously guarding your way of doing things.

Or stay silent. If you can’t respond with grace, then just don’t respond. Silence is a much better response than anger or defensiveness or quitting.

Carry on. You’ve responded gracefully; now get back to doing your amazing things. ■

Leo Babauta is the author of The Power of Less and the creator and blogger at www.zenhabits.net, a Top 100 blog with 175,000 subscribers — one of the top productivity and simplicity blogs on the Internet. It was recently named one of the Top 25 blogs by TIME magazine. Babauta is a former journalist and freelance writer of 18 years, a husband and father of six children.

fathers.com | May 2011

For Understanding Your Wife Written by the dads @ fathers.com Do you fully appreciate the benefits your children's mother brings to their lives — ­ and your life? It's no revelation that women are different from men in many ways. Often, those differences can be sources of conflict, and those differences involve much more than where one squeezes the toothpaste.

Having children really brings these differences to the surface, whether it's how you approach discipline, household tasks for the kids, or your time commitment to work and family.

It's important to learn to understand, accept and honor the differences between yourself and your wife (or children's mother).

Your children need something that she is uniquely equipped to give; they benefit from her approach to parenting just like they benefit from yours. In many disagreements, the real issue isn't about who's right and who's wrong; it's a matter of understanding and appreciating differences. Your job is to learn to be complimentary instead of contradictory. Children need to see what healthy, loving marriages look like.

Learn to appreciate and meet her emotional needs As a general rule, compared to you a woman connects more through conversation, she places higher value on thoughtful and romantic gestures, and her identity is more attached to her home. How do those generalities describe your wife? If you don't know, ask her (and listen)!

Know her "love language."

What makes her feel loved the most? Is it gifts? Time together?

Acts of service? Physical affec-

tion? All of these are important, but too many husbands think they're showing love when they're actually "speaking the wrong language." You may be expressing love by bringing her gifts, but if her language is spoken words, then she isn't getting the message. She may even think you're trying to buy her love. Or, you may be doing good works for her to get out of the dog house, but what she really needs is for you to spend more time talking and listening to her.

Communicate about expectations.

It's hard to have a strong marriage or be a great parenting team if you aren't working toward the same goal. Ask her, "What's your idea of a good marriage?"

And answer the question yourself. Talk about your parents' marriages and qualities in other marriages you may want to emulate or avoid.

ACTION POINTS • Ask your children what qualities they're looking for in a future mate.

(Often their answers will reflect something about your marriage or your attitudes about marriage.)

• Show respect to your kids' mom and encourage them to honor her—even if you're a divorced dad.

• Without making a show of it, make a compromise that shows you appreciate how your wife is physically and/or emotionally different from you.

• Ask your wife, "What communicates love to you most clearly?" Then start focusing your efforts more in the area of her "love language."

• Schedule a time when you and your wife can get away alone and do something fun together.

Friends and

Neighbors Meet Anthony Balajadia Age: 27 Education: Bachelor of Science in Kinesiology from the University of San Francisco Profession: Realtor with Edge Realty, Varsity coach for Saint Paul Basketball.

Hobbies: coaching youth sports, swimming in Guam's beautiful beaches, enjoying the weekends with family and friends

Why Real Estate?

“I was attracted to the real estate profession because of its flexibility and earning possibilities. I decided to join Edge Realty because my family is involved in the real estate business. I have been assisting them with their investments for several years and decided that it was time to strengthen my knowledge in the real estate profession.

I was fortunate enough to meet Alfredo Bustamante, the owner of Edge Realty during a real estate meeting; However, several months had passed while I was working with another company when I came to the realization that I needed to search for a more aggressive, knowledgeable, and professional broker. That is when I decided to make the transition into Edge Realty.

Focus on the clientS

One of the sentiments that struck a chord with me during the initial meeting with Alfredo Bustamante was and I quote, ‘Anthony, do not focus on the money, focus on the service to your clients. The money will follow the transaction as long as your clients are satisfied.’ I have now been with Edge Realty for several months and in that time I have been able to learn and immerse myself into a pool of invaluable knowledge that I was unable to gain elsewhere.

A Need to Help

My objectives as a realtor are to provide professional advice to my family, as well as my clients, to assist them in making sound decisions; whether it be rentals, purchasing a home or investment opportunities. My long term goal in this profession is to obtain my broker license within the next 12 months.

A Blessed Life

I have been blessed that God has provided me with a great, loving family who supports me in everything that I do. Now, God has provided me with the opportunity to make a difference in my clients' lives. My passion for real estate has been realized and everyday I wake up in the morning, I have the chance to make a difference.

If I can help you in any way possible, please don’t hesitate to contact me at 688-7173.”

— Anthony Balajadia

Ask Dave | Finances | May 2011

By Dave Ramsey

IS IT THE RIGHT TIME TO ACCEPT SOME HELP? What do I need to consider before getting assistance from Dad? Many of them didn’t even want to

Dear Dave, We have $21,000 in credit card debt, and ongoing medical expenses for our special-needs child.

My husband works very hard, but only makes about $25,000 a year, and we’re living in a 30-year old trailer.

My dad is willing to help us pay off some of the debt, and get us moved into a house, if we’ll get financial counseling. Is there a better way out of this situation?

— Sheryl Dear SHERYL, If you’re going to have to make payments to your dad, in other words, if the money is going to be a loan, don’t do it. The borrower is always slave to the lender. If you really want to ruin family events, have debt to your parents. It twists you up inside, and it’ll be especially hard on your husband.

Now, if this is going to be a gift, and there are no expectations of re-payment being made, that’s a little different. But if you were my child and I wrote you a $21,000 check, I’d expect you to go into financial counseling and start saving money for your child’s future and for yours. That’s only reasonable. You guys obviously aren’t wasteful yuppies spending money right and left, but having a family and raising kids in the Dallas – Fort Worth area on $25,000 a year is tough — even without

32 THE HIGH ROAD MAY 2011

do this; they just felt obligated to do it by people like you. There are a lot of ladies who have sacrificed their ability to be full-time moms on the altar of the car payment.

Now, sometimes ladies have to go to work. There’s a time and a place for that kind of thing. But if there’s any way I can financialthe credit card bills you’re talking about.

Another thing I’d advise is that your husband get on a five-year game plan to improve his earning potential. Sit down with him, hold hands, and let him know he can be anything he wants to be. Then, help him decide what he wants to be in five years, what he wants to be making five years down the road, and the steps he’s going to take educationally or in terms of training to achieve that goal.

He’s a hard-working man, but today’s culture doesn’t reward hard work alone. You’ve got to engage the gray matter a little, and boost your brain power, too. You make more money when you plan to make more money!

— Dave

Dear dave, I have three stepchildren, the oldest of which is married and has a little baby. The only time we hear from him is when they want money. We don’t mind helping out once in a while, but his wife just seems lazy. She stays at home all the time, and doesn’t help bring in anything. What can we do to fix this?

— Cindy

Dear CINDY, When your relationship with someone is based on you giving

them money, then you don’t have a relationship. But there may be other reasons they aren’t calling very much.

If you say things about his wife being lazy when you do talk, it probably makes them both angry. If this is the case, they may only call when they’re desperate enough to put up with your comments about her. Plus, taking care of a baby is one of the hardest full-time jobs around.

The value or importance of what someone does isn’t always reflected in a paycheck.

— Dave

Dear dave, I listen to you often and enjoy your radio show, but why don’t you ever ask women to go to work? When a family is broke, and the woman is at home raising one child who is already in the fifth grade, why can’t the wife get a “second job?”

— George

Dear George I think far too many ladies, in the name of paying for stuff they don’t need, have left the household and the children for the workplace.

ly and budget-wise figure out how mom can be waiting at home with a big hug and a plate full of cookies when that fifth grader walks in the house – and if that’s what she wants to do – then you’re going to find me fighting for her opportunity to do that. There’s no higher calling on the planet than motherhood. We’ve lost that in our culture, and we’re suffering dearly for it.

I’m no Neanderthal jerk. I don’t say every mother has to be at home or they’re a bad person.

But these days we’ve got very few people who defend full-time, inthe-home motherhood. The inference you’re making is that she’s not helping, or worse, lazy. Why don’t you go take over her job for a week? I think you’ll find out in a hurry there’s not a lazy bone in her body!

— Dave ■

Dave Ramsey is a personal money management expert, popular national radio personality and the author of three New York Times best sellers – The Total Money Makeover, Financial Peace Revisited and More Than Enough. In them, Ramsey exemplifies his life’s work of teaching others how to be financially responsible. For more information visit www.daveramsey.com.

Dining Out | May 2011

Nana's Cafe

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Affordable, high variety

With a very diverse menu selection to perfectly fit each of your family members’ tastes, Nana’s Café, formerly Sails in Tumon across form the Guam Plaza Hotel can satisfy all palates at a relatively inexpensive price.

“The variety of dishes on the menu is exceptional and it’s all very affordable,” says Ayaka Yamaguchi, City Hill Co. (Guam), Ltd. Sales and Marketing/PR and Advertising Manager. “The chef really takes charge in how to prepare dishes, as well as choosing what to serve. He carefully selects ingredients for dishes on his own.”

For Yamaguchi, her favorite dish on the menu is the Grilled Black Cod, which has a version available at both lunch and dinnertime.

“The fish is so tender – it’s almost as if it were steamed, rather than grilled as it is actually prepared,” Yamaguchi says. “The sauce is really good too. I really think it matches the taste and texture of the fish very well.”

Local residents may find a familiar face in the restaurant’s Executive Chef, Takuhiko Kishimoto, who spent a majority of his first years in Guam in the kitchens and grills at the former Kurumaya Seahorse restaurant.

The Japanese chef spent most of his formative years studying and practicing French cuisine and food preparation and later applied his culinary skills in Guam. He officially moved to the island over 20 years ago.

Kishimoto brings Asian/European fusion to his dishes served at Nana’s Café. With over two decades of culinary excellence in Guam, his fused dishes are further specialized to satisfy local palates.

Most mouth-watering dinner entrees start from just a little over $20 from the Resident Dinner Special menu. Entrée selections include a tasty Grilled Basa with Cajun Mushroom and Penne, a hearty Meat Lovers Assorted Grill (tenderloin, lamb chops, chicken and pork ribs), and an exquisite Canadian Lobster and Salmon Steak with Nana’s special sauce. For the family member or friend who is constantly hungry or for those simply wanting to indulge, the restaurant also offers a “Big Portion Selection” on their menu. The Big Portion Selection includes a choice of either a double T-Bone steak (Porter House), a double Tenderloin steak (Chateaubriand) or a Rib Eye “One Pound” steak, starting from $46.

The name “Nana’s Café” has several origins. First, the name gives a home-style feel

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B

C

D

IMAGES OF TASTE

to the restaurant ambiance as well as food offerings, as “Nana” is a local word for grandmother, Yamaguchi says. Second, the date the restaurant opened was July 7, and “na na” means seven-seven in Japanese, Kishimoto says. Whatever the true meaning is of the restaurant's name, the familiar definition will be excellent, satisfying dishes at a very affordable price. Coupled with a beautiful ocean front location and friendly, attentive staff, the restaurant will easily become one of your top choices for lunch and dinner. 

A. Meat Lovers Assorted Grill B. Nana's Honey Fried Shrimp appetizer.

C. Grilled Basa Fish Fillet with Cajun Mushroom and Penne.

D. Canadian Lobster and Salmon Steak with Nana's Special Sauce.

INFORMATION: Nana’s Café is open daily from 11 a.m. to 2 p.m. for lunch, with the last order at 1:45 p.m. and again for dinner from 6 p.m. to 10 p.m. with the last order at 9:45 p.m. Reservations may be made by calling 649-7760 or 649-6262/6264.

SPECIAL ANNOUNCEMENT

Triple J GROUP Unveils new management team Promotions Robert H. Jones, Chairman & CEO of the Triple J Group of companies and outgoing President announced key promotions that were approved by the Triple J Board of Directors. “I am in good health and will continue to be involved in Triple J planning and development, yet it is time to implement a succession plan. I ask that everyone give their support to these proven leaders of the Triple J Group,” said Jones.

Jeffrey B. Jones Promoted to President & COO, Triple J Group Jeffrey B. Jones, has been promoted from Executive Vice President to President and Chief Operating Officer. Jeff is the second-eldest of Robert Jones’ three children and was born and raised on Guam.

In his new role, he will oversee the company’s operations which include diverse businesses in Guam, Saipan, Ebeye, Majuro, and California.

The Triple J group of companies has several major operations which include the Triple J Auto Group, which represents Ford, Lincoln, Mazda, Honda, Acura, Kia, Mitsubishi, Suzuki, and a used car dealership. Triple J Five Star Wholesale Foods distributes highquality food items including Certified Angus Beef, Hawaii Water, and Tyson food products. The Triple J Restaurant Group owns Outback Steakhouse in Guam, Tony Roma’s and Capricciosa in Saipan, and the Palau Angus Steakhouse in Palau.

Triple J also owns other auto-related subsidiaries including Triple J Commercial Tire Center, Battery & Lube which services passenger cars, light trucks, and a full range of commercial vehicles and equipment. In addition, Triple J operates Hertz Rent A Car on Guam, Saipan and Majuro, under the subsidiary Triple J Rentals (Guam), Inc. and Triple J Rentals (Micronesia), Inc., licensees of Hertz International.

Jones learned the family business from the bottom up. "My first job at Triple J was washing cars," he says.

"One of the things you learn is that even if the job is monotonous, sticking to it and seeing it through to completion is important. Not only in a job but in life." His interest in automotive sales led him to eventually head up the company's largest division, Triple J Autogroup. "I enjoy that part of the business," he says, "It's a chal-

lenge, it's such a demanding business - being able to manage that and also being able to oversee some of the other businesses, but, fortunately, we have a really good team."

Jones says he has enormous respect for his father as the driving force behind the company. He believes the reason for Triple J's success is its dedication to customers, its employees and personal commitment. "We want to maintain long term relationships with our customers and employees.

We're going to be here long-term, we hope they will be too."

Jones graduated from the University of North Carolina with a degree in business. He has served on the Executive Committee of the Guam Chamber of Commerce and was past president of the Guam Auto Dealers Association. With a full plate, he still makes his family and faith a priority.

He is a member of the board at the Bayview Church and Pacific Mission Aviation. He stays in shape for his active life by jogging and outrigger canoeing. He and his wife, Jane, have five children, Jessica, Jonah, Jasmine, Jada and Josiah.

Jay B. Jones Promoted to Senior Vice President, Triple J Group Jay B. Jones has been promoted from Vice President to Senior Vice President. He will take on Jeff Jones’ previous role in overseeing the Triple J Auto Group.

Jay B. Jones was born and raised on Guam. After graduating from Father Duenas High School, he attended Elon College in North Carolina where he graduated with a B.A. in Corporate Communications. Upon returning to Guam with his wife Deane, Jay started in Triple J's management training program, where he held numerous positions within the company. In 1993, Jay enrolled in the National Auto-

mobile Dealers Association Management Academy, an intensive year-long course concentrating on automotive management. After graduating from the program, Jay was promoted to the position of Sales Manager, a position he held until 1997. In early 1997, Jay relocated to Saipan where he managed Triple J's various operations and ultimately served as VicePresident of Triple J Saipan, Inc. In 2008, Jay returned to Guam where he assumed the role of Vice President and General Manager of Triple J Auto Group.

tial development projects in the Raleigh, NC area. "I'm a people person and enjoy working with stakeholders to move projects from the drawing board to physical reality," says Murrell.

R. Dan Murrell, Promoted to Senior Vice President, Triple J Group

Michael Sablan Promoted to Vice President, Finance and Administration, Triple J Group

R. Dan Murrell has been promoted from Vice President to Senior Vice President. He assists in the management of the operations of Triple J Five Star Wholesale Foods, the Triple J Restaurant Group, Triple J 24 Hour Mini Mart and is the principal broker for Triple J Real Estate.

Murrell is married to Julie Jones Murrell, Robert H. Jones’ eldest child.

The Murrells resided in North Carolina until they made the decision to move to Guam in 1992. In 1995, Murrell was promoted from manager of the real estate division to vice president of Triple J Enterprises.

Murrell graduated from Wake Forest University, and was employed in sales and marketing for Carolina Freight, servicing the Tennessee and Georgia area. Murrell later went to work for Family Health International, in the marketing department of the for-profit division, Clinical Research International which provides drug studies for pharmaceutical firms.

On the advice of his father-in-law, Robert H. Jones, Murrell became a licensed real estate broker in North Carolina where he continues to maintain a license. Murrell worked on residen-

Murrell currently serves as Vice President of the Board of Trustees of St. John’s School and District Chairman for Boy Scouts of America. Murrell says his greatest satisfaction still comes from spending time with his wife and children, and his extended family and friends out on the waters of Micronesia and the North Carolina coast.

Michael Sablan has been promoted from Corporate Auditor to Vice President, Finance and Administration.

Sablan oversees internal audits across the group and supervises the preparation of financial statements and reports. Prior to joining Triple J, Sablan was the Public Auditor for the Commonwealth of the Northern Mariana Islands where he oversaw government performance, compliance, and financial audits. Sablan joined Triple J in August 2008.

He has a B.A. in Economics from UCLA and is a certified public accountant, licensed in California and Guam.

Sablan is also actively involved with the community. He is the finance Chairman for the NMI Boy Scouting Program, past President of the Rotary Club of Saipan, past Vice Chairman of the Saipan Chamber of Commerce and past regional Vice President for the Association of Government Accountants Pacific Rim Region. He is also a member of the American Institute of Certified Public Accountants and Guam Society of Certified Public Accountants.

Fitness | May 2011

*Consult your physician before beginning any exercise program.

The second article in a two-part feature.

MUSCULAR STRENGTH IMBALANCES CORRECTED

A BETTER BODY Needs a BALANCED WORKOUT

By Steve Oshiro In Part I of this article, I discussed muscular strength imbalances between the left and right sides of the body and some training protocols that can be used to correct them.

This type of strength imbalance is usually caused by repetitive and asymmetrical use of certain muscles over an extended period of time. It is quite common in athletes who participate in sports that require that the same set of movements be performed over and over again. It can also occur in individuals whose daily work activities require repetitive motion.

This month I will focus on strength imbalances that can occur between opposing muscle groups. Movement is possible when muscles in our bodies elongate and contract; opposing each other to open and close joints. This neuromuscular relationship is called reciprocal inhibition. It is the relaxation of a muscle group and the contraction of an opposing muscle group. This causes muscles to load and then fire. Simply stated, movement is reciprocal inhibition at work.

Once an imbalance occurs, the body often recruits other muscles to help perform a movement to compensate for the weakness. The alignment and flexibility in the body can become affected, eventually leading to injury.

This type of strength imbalance is often a result of one’s strength training practices. People often pattern their workouts following bodybuilding principles. This method of strength training requires exercises which isolate muscles.

Bodybuilding training protocol calls for the compartmentalization of muscles in a workout. The body is divided into parts, with muscles assigned a specific day of training. The goal is to focus on one or two muscles with maximum effort and then to give it several days to rest.

One of the drawbacks of isolating muscles in strength training is that the connection between opposing muscles is often broken up in the process. The chest is trained separately from back; the biceps trained separately from the triceps; the quadriceps trained separately from the hamstrings and so forth. If the training is not monitored closely and in its totality, it can become easy for some muscles to be trained harder than others. Overtime, this can lead to strength imbalances that negatively affect the reciprocal inhibition between muscles.

Sometimes, a person may develop an aversion to training certain muscles and train it half-heartedly or avoid it entirely.

Often, the muscles that are the most taxing to train or the ones that can’t be admired in front of a mirror get neglected.

I’m sure you’ve seen that guy in the gym with “chicken legs,” who always trains his chest and biceps. Don’t become that guy!  36 THE HIGH ROAD MAY 2011

Models: Dixie and Eric Model: DixieFly. & Eric Fly Photography: Eugene Herrera Photography: EugeneC. C. Herrera

Steve’s Tip:

1

Training Legs

Choose multi-joint exercises as the foundation of leg training. If you perform isolated leg extensions for quads, perform isolated leg curls for hamstrings. Strength imbalances between the quadriceps, hamstrings, and glutes can lead to knee, hip and lower back injuries.

Steve Oshiro is a fitness trainer certified in strength and conditioning. He has trained many of Guam’s elite athletes, bodybuilders and fitness athletes to winning performances. But, mostly he enjoys training the average Joe and has twice coached the winners of “Guam’s Biggest Loser”. Steve firmly believes that modeling exercise and nutrition to meet fitness goals is the formula for success. He can be contacted at fit360@gmail.com.

Steve’s Tip:

2

Training Chest & Back

Steve’s Tip:

Choose multi-joint exercises as the foundation of chest and back training.

Your strength in pressing exercises should be relatively close to your strength in rowing exercises. Strength imbalances between these groups of muscles can lead to shoulder injuries and poor spinal alignment.

3

Training Arms

Steve’s Tip:

Pay attention to both your biceps and triceps. Biceps often get all the attention and glory, but the triceps make up more than half of the upper arm. Functionally, the triceps are required to help more muscles perform work.

Strength imbalances between the two can cause injuries to the elbow and shoulder joints.

Steve’s Tip:

Good Works | May 2011

Reaching out to the public and saving lives The Guam Diabetes Association in focus On occasions when Michele G. Blas hears a song

by Patsy Cline, or even an Eagles track, she can only think of her mother, Gloria Blas Taijito.

Blas

all the kids with their Easter baskets running through the yard looking for eggs. She used to say she was a lucky lady to have her birthday, Mother’s Day and Easter so close together, but we were the lucky ones.”

Blas and her mother are not alone, as diabetes afflicts an alarmingly large percentage of Guam residents. In a recent study by the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, about 9.1 percent of the population has been diagnosed with the disease, which is higher than the U.S. national average. What’s even more alarming is that the actual number of residents afflicted by diabetes may be considerably higher, as many cases go undiagnosed for various reasons including denial, says Winnie Butler, executive director of the Guam Diabetes Association.

Luckily for Guam, the island has an active non-profit organization that has a mission of promoting awareness and education of the disease, which in many cases may be prevented.

Blas remembers that her mother kept her lively spirit despite being diagnosed with diabetes and suffering from other health conditions, including a bile duct condition that claimed her life three years ago.

Taijito Blas and her late mother both lived with Diabetes.

Late April through early May is the time when she remembers her late mother a lot, as celebrations for her mother’s birthday, Easter Sunday and Mother’s Day all generally follow one right after the other.

“We’re a small family, but she always cooked up such an elaborate spread for Easter Sunday for whomever stopped by to celebrate with us,” Blas says. “My mom especially loved watching 38 THE HIGH ROAD MAY 2011

Her mother was diagnosed with diabetes in her mid 40s, but Blas is uncertain of the exact age, she says.

“I can only remember that she wasn’t devastated and she swore that she wouldn’t let herself become a victim,” Blas says. “She took a hold of the situation … learned everything she could about her condition, followed the doctor’s orders exactly, and began doing everything she could to make sure she didn’t let it beat her.

“We were right there with her.

She used to give herself insulin at the table every morning like clockwork. She monitored her

blood sugar levels and began changing her diet,” Blas says.

According the World Health Organization, diabetes is a “chronic disease, which occurs when the pancreas Butler does not produce enough insulin, or when the body cannot effectively use the insulin it produces. This leads to an increased concentration of glucose in the blood (hyperglycemia).”

Blas’ mother eventually beat diabetes, and she continued to practice a healthier lifestyle to prevent its reoccurrence.

“I was also diagnosed with Type 2 diabetes at the age of 19, but by emulating my mom’s good example, I too was able to get off medication and now live healthier,” Blas says. “Like her, I have made a routine of regular exercise, making better food choices while still allowing myself to indulge a little bit here and there.”

The organization works continuously through diabetes sessions open to the public every second Tuesday of each month at Catholic Social Services at 5:30 p.m. At the sessions, local health professionals provide insight and case studies related to diabetes and the disease’s many complications. Additionally, the organization’s members perform outreach missions. Outreach programs include complimentary glucose testing and blood pressure reading. Recently, the group has added body fat analysis screening, Butler says.

Annually, the organization puts out a conference in November, where visiting health professionals are invited as guest speakers, to educate the community. The day conference is free of charge for participants. Another annual

By Jill Espiritu

event is the 5K run, also in November, which attracts close to 1,000 runners.

“One visiting speaker in particular, mentioned that a person, who is clueless about having the disease, could have a glass splinter in his or her foot and not even know it is bleeding,” says Clara Peterson, a GDA board member. “The person loses all sense of feeling in certain limbs as a result of diabetes. Other past speakers mentioned that for diabetics, it takes longer for the body to heal from minor cuts or even nicks from ingrown nails.

Participants learn so much, and it is really helpful not only for those with the disease but for those with family or friends with the Peterson disease.”

Both Butler and Peterson started their involvement with the organization after an immediate family member had been diagnosed with the disease. For Butler, it is her husband Carl, who currently is the president of the GDA and for Peterson, it is her 84-year-old mother, Rita Cruz Okada, who Peterson considers the core of her family.

“Our mission is to promote awareness of the prevalence of the disease and education about the disease’s complications,” Butler says. “For me personally, I feel a sense of gratification knowing that in some way I helped someone – maybe through an outreach program, by providing educational material to someone who comes to the GDA office or even sharing firsthand experience of caring for a family member with diabetes that helps them cope.” 

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Wellness | May 2011

Caregivers: Support is available CONTINUED FROM Pg. 27 now-deceased grandmother, understands how difficult it is for a caregiver to let go of their duties for a time and do something for one’s self.

"You're always worried about them. You're always worried that, 'Did they fall? Did they take their medicine? Did they eat?'”

“We suggest that when caregivers are able to take the time out, to go and do something— even if it's sleeping, going on the computer, or leaving the house, and going shopping—do something that has nothing to do with caregiving."

Other examples are sitting at the beach, visiting a neighbor, or going to a coffee shop with a friend.

"We always try to give our clients ideas on what to do, but I know it's hard because they're still checking their phone for text messages from whoever's at home, or calling to make sure the care recipient is okay. It never leaves the caregiver completely, but if it's just for two hours it allows the caregiver to be refreshed and get rid of some of the stress."

Now that her father’s condition has improved since that first year and a half, Estoy says she's now able to give some time to herself.

“One of my best investments was getting a gym membership.

Trying to adopt a sportier lifestyle has helped me vent some stress and keep my body healthy.”

FURTHER ASSISTANCE Sometimes seeking outside assistance is necessary. For those who qualify, UOG’s Family Caregiver Support program may help

40 THE HIGH ROAD MAY 2011

[ ABOVE: Maria Timoteo among some of the clients serviced by CSS Adult Day Care. ] BELOW: Mary Camacho of the CSS In-Home Services Program. caregivers with any stage of their caregiver duties—from dealing with insurance paperwork to getting respite care to receiving counseling.

Caregivers can also turn to Catholic Social Services, a nonprofit group that provides assistance to those who are 60 years old or older and are unable to perform two of a specified set of daily living activities (such as eating, dressing, bathing, using the toilet, or walking).

CSS’s In-Home Services Program provides personal care, homemaker, chore, and telephone reassurance services.

Those who live alone have the highest priority.

The program is provided under contract with the Department of Public Health and Social Services, Division of Senior Citizens. It can only service 300 clients annually.

Under this program, nursing assistants go into client homes to feed, shower, change bedding, or do light housekeeping.

The telephone service uses volunteers to call clients to check on them regularly.

Mary Camacho, who retired from the government as a social worker, has been working at the In-Home Program for eight years and is the program manager.

“Our purpose is to make the manamko comfortable and

to prevent institutionalization.

When people are not cared for, their health deteriorates—they don’t shower; they don’t get out of bed. As we come to shower them, they’re clean again and they’re ready for the day.”

Camacho adds that the nursing assistants' service provides a cleaner environment so that the elderly can focus on more important things—such as eating well and taking their medication on time.

Adult Day Care Family members who are working during the day or cannot be full-time caregivers can turn to the CSS’s Adult Day Care Center in Barrigada.

The center is open weekdays from 7 a.m. to 6 p.m. This is one of two such CSS facilities. The other is the Dementia Center in Dededo.

Program Manager Maria Timoteo says, “We take care of them for at least nine to 10 hours a day. The caregivers and the registered nurse make sure to pro-

vide quality service. We try to make [the manamko] independent again.”

Space is very limited. The program’s 11 staff members can only service a maximum of 35 elderly clients per day.

The center provides physical activities—such as walking and stretching—to help the clients regain their strength. The oldest client right now is 94 years old.

Timoteo says she receives a lot of positive feedback. Families often ask for the center to open during the weekend or call the center to ask what they need donated since the center’s services are free for the clients.

Timoteo, who’s been at CSS for seven years, admits that her job is challenging, but she wouldn’t have it any other way.

“When I first started, I didn’t want to work here because I see that [the elderly clients sometimes] have a temper. But, the one thing that changed my mind is the thought that serving them is like serving my mom. As the days go by, I begin to think that if I do this now—when I get old— somebody is going to do this for me." 

For More Information and assistance University of Guam Family Caregiver Support Program House #31 Dean’s Circle UOG Station Mangilao, Guam 96923 (671) 735-3290 Catholic Social Services • In-Home Services Program (671) 635-1415, (671) 635-1419, (671) 6351420 • Adult Day Care Center 234 US Army Juan C. Fejeran St., Barrigada, Guam 96913 (671) 635-1451

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