Wellbeing with Alex

The broader question for the type-A personalities like me is – at what point are we going to call time on ourselves? On our expectations? On our snap judgements? On overworking ourselves to prove what we fundamentally know – that we are already enough? Because whether or not you care to admit it, that’s true. The very fact that you have dreams in your head, goals to achieve, blood in your veins, air in your lungs and hopefully somewhere warm to come home to at night is indicative of that. Your value isn’t something that can be measured, graphed, compared and discarded because you didn’t measure up in your own mind. You had it before the exam stress, the drinks at the bar on your Instagram story, the times you wish things were different.

If you relate to this article, a few things that I wish I knew earlier:

Placing greater importance on my own wellbeing – There is a saying that says ‘Be wary of a naked person when they offer you a shirt’. You can only contribute as much as you’re willing to give, so giving to yourself begins a virtuous cycle. Self-care is as varied as the people who practice it, so find a few little things that bring joy and implement them daily, weekly, monthly and so on. There are plenty of fluffy

articles who will tell you how to take care of yourself – this isn’t one of them.

• Try grabbing a journal – Yes, I am aware that journaling has become trendy (Kikki. K I’m looking at you darl) but it is a way to vent your feelings to something that cannot retaliate. It feels weird, but if done consistently, it may help you find the root causes of any emotional difficulty and not the symptoms.

• Everyone’s pathway is different to yours

– This idea that you must succeed at the highest level is an idea internalised in the education system as a whole. Work hard, recite information, get a good set of grades, receive praise. Rinse and repeat. If you get into law school, it’s pretty clear that your secondary or undergraduate results have got you there. The potential danger lies with placing expectations on oneself based on the idea that what worked once will work again. Who you were at one point in time is not the same person you are now. I know that 18-year old Alexander wouldn’t recognise me if we met at Rundle Mall.

• Discover what you like and don’t like and try building skills - This dot point is in two parts because having the courage to discover what works and doesn’t work for you is the starting point. For example, I like mooting because not only do I get to hear the sound of my own voice, it brings out my competitiveness. However, the skill that I gain from that is that it sharpens my legal reasoning skills and gives me instantaneous feedback that I find far more helpful than written feedback.

This article is full of things you may already know, and if you’re doing what works for you, then I tip my hat. However for those of you like me, who are stumbling towards the light, I just want you to know that you’ll get there, one step at a time.

Just don’t keep your knife too sharp.