The Pitch: The Summer Guide (June 2023)

SATURDAY, JUNE 24

FRIDAY, AUGUST 4

THURSDAY, AUGUST 10

Mudvayne with Coal Chamber, GWAR, Nonpoint and more

FRIDAY, AUGUST 11 Y’allapalooza with Parker Mccollum, Chris Lane, Travis Denning and more

SATURDAY, AUGUST 19

Incubus with Badflower and paris jackson

SATURDAY, AUGUST 26

Turnpike Troubadours with The Avett Brothers, Old 97s and Kaitlin Butts

WEDNESDAY, AUGUST 30

Gojira with Mastodon

FRIDAY, SEPTEMBER 15 Rob Zombie with Alice Cooper, Ministry and Filter

Drag artist Daisy Buckët shows off her secrets in The Pitch Questionnaire

Daisy Buckët (aka Spencer Brown) is most known for her vocal skills, with a debut album under her belt and international tours occurring on a regular basis. Her show “Raising the Bar (or How I Bar Hopped to the Top)” came to The Black Box at the end of April. We were able to send some questions her way and gain some insight into the life of one of KC’s most popular drag queens.

6

LETTER

Letter from the [Other] Editor She Works Hard For The Money

BY STEPH CASTOR

8 POLITICS

Razer’s Edge

Meet the Missouri Senator who is “optimistic that we’ve hit rock bottom” when it comes to LGBTQIA+ rights

BY BARB SHELLY

10

By the Book

KC banned conversion therapy, but political cowardice took a bigger stand

BY TYLER SCHNEIDER

12

SUMMER GUIDE

The Summer Guide BY THE PITCH STAFF & PILSEN

PHOTO-CO-OP

Pitch Pop-Up

DIY drink recipes for the porch, pool, parking lot, and your neighbor’s pontoon

BY KATE FRICK

Mayor Lucas discusses Reparations Commission appointees and what comes next

The Pitch sat down with Mayor Lucas following the announcement of the Mayor’s Commission on Reparations. Lucas answers common questions about funding, public engagement, and the impact areas the reparations would target. Commission appointees

Kelli Hearn and Ryan Sorrell weigh in on their goals and why reparatory justice is long overdue for KC’s Black community.

Tales from the Kelce Jam: We came, we saw, we have some regrets

The Pitch joined 2,000 fans at Travis Kelce’s inaugural Kelce Jam, and the results are in. It was a spectacle of pure entertainment and chaos—pretty much what one would expect from the rowdy 33-year-old and seven-time All Pro selection. Musical talent was stacked with headliners, including Tech N9ne, Rick Ross, Loud Luxury, and Machine Gun Kelly. Many festival-goers took the opportunity to booze and feast on iconic local eats like Joe’s BBQ, Q39, and free WingStop samples. Of course, Kelce led the all-ages crowd in his signature hype antics throughout the night, including not one but two sing-alongs to “Fight For Your Right.”

24

CULTURE

Throwback to the Future

Secondhand salvation and domestic resurrection in Elizabeth Daniel’s personal bazaar

BY EMMA HILBOLDT

26

Float on ‘em

Sensory deprivation is anything but

BY LIZ COOK

28

K-Hole Sun, Won’t You Come?

Thinking outside the box with ketamine

BY GRACE WILMOT

30

What Lies Beneath

The gentle art of Godfrey Riddle’s grief-pit cleaning

BY EMMA HILBOLDT

32

Diversity is Key

34

FOOD & DRINK

Farm to Fable Noka delivers on sincerity, but is it worth the price?

BY LAUREN TEXTOR

35

Eat This Now

Chocolate Cream Pie at Ladybird Diner

BY SARAH SIPPLE

Drink This Now Krispy Girl at Servaes Brewing Company

BY SARAH SIPPLE

36

Mise en Place

Little Butter’s Kelsey Earl vows to make cake silly again

BY KATE FRICK

ADVICE

Keep Them Coming

Where have all the lesbian bars gone?

BY KRISTEN THOMAS

41

Solve For Stuck

Myth Busters: Mental health edition

BY BRITT FRANK

42

KC CARES

String Sprouts

BY BETH LIPOFF

& BELLE

YENNIE

Meghann Henry’s tool for leading

What If Puppets

BY SOPHIA JOELLE-OSWALD

38

MUSIC

Bound for Glory

How Midnight Market’s queer BDSM exchange built LFK’s safest space

BY NICK SPACEK

Cover by Cassondra Jones, photo by Pilsen Photo Co-op, staging by Elizabeth Daniel Art & Decor, models: Karmella Uchawi (cover), Genewa Stanwyck, Dirty Dorothy, Lana Luxx, Jenna Stanwyck

Courtesy image

Kelce Jam. Maura Dayton

Daisy Buckët. Maggie Gulling Photography

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Letter from the [Other] Editor

SHE WORKS HARD FOR THE MONEY

By Steph Castor

When I was 14, two months into my freshman year of high school, I moved from California’s Central Coast to Baldwin City, KS, where I would eventually teach myself guitar and meet my first girlfriend. During my early stages of coming out, I routinely hitched a ride to Lawrence in the backseat of my best friend’s minivan while listening to Less Than Jake through crackling speakers, windows down, whipping my Manic Panic atomic pink hair into knots.

Between the occasional makeout sesh at Centennial Skate Park and double-shot Sex Bomb coffee dates at The Java Break (IYKYK), I leaned heavily on picking up The Pitch Weekly every Thursday at the crosswalk between Supersonic Music and the Granada. This ritual helped me stay connected to anything remotely interesting throughout this newfound cultural desert, at least in my mind. Rock Against Bush at the Beaumont Club, Rise Against with Tsunami Bomb and Alexisonfire at El Torreón, poetry slams, Brown Bag Drag featuring Daisy Buckët... ok, obviously I was very wrong about the Midwest. Turns out it’s fucking great—when you know where to look.

Without realizing it, I used the publication as a tool for finding inclusivity and solidarity, and it might have made me a better person.

I used to say working for The Pitch would be a dream job. I never guessed it would actually happen. Here’s to coming full circle.

What you’re currently looking at is perhaps one of the most organically collaborative issues of The Pitch we have to date—er, well, at least in the year and some change that I’ve been associate editor here.

The Summer Guide is meant to be an extensive list of really cool events in the

KMRA Tasting Club offers unique shared dining experience for the adventurous Kansas City’s KMRA Tasting Club is a new way to dine if you’re looking to try something out of the box. It’s a shared dining experience, meaning you work with the other people at your table to decide what you’ll order for your six-course evening. This article takes you inside the folklore of a menu and what an evening at KMRA Tasting Club can invoke.

Boar skin-wrapped rabbit confit with chamomile spring pea mash, garlic scapes, and apple potato cheddar gratin from KMRA Tasting Club. Lauren Textor

metro and surrounding areas, organized into thoughtful categories so readers can stay connected to the vibrant sanctuary that is our city. You’ll also find a story on Missouri State Senator Greg Razer’s advocacy for trans youth. You’ll learn how to thrift for relics. You’ll see how ketamine is actually transformative. You’ll learn Midnight Market’s kinks and the power of respecting “no.” Thirsty? Keep your eyes peeled for our newest series, Pitch Pop-Up, in which Kate Frick shares simple drink recipes that will impress your neighbors and make you want to call yourself a “mixologist.” (Please, don’t do that.)

When Brock first asked me to spearhead our annual Summer Guide, I knew right away that I wanted it to be this super empowered, glossy, vibrant, juicy, delectable masterpiece of… beautiful people doing fun things.

We wanted this to be a Pride issue without having to call it a Pride issue. Not because we don’t want to celebrate people for who they are and who they love, but because a decent percentage of our staff stands under that big queer umbrella, and we do our very best to make sure every issue is giving a voice to those who’ve been silenced and appreciating those who dare to be authentic.

We wanted the June issue to feel like stepping into a better version of a Midwestern summer. A parallel universe. The way things should be. And I think we’ve accomplished that.

Upon reaching out to the power duo at Pilsen Photo Co-op with the idea of a ‘60s/’70s/’80s-inspired kitschy Americana drag BBQ, it was evident that we all had the same vision. Photographer Caleb Condit said he wanted “people to see these photos and think, ‘Yeah, that really happened.’”

And I want to stress that it did, in fact, happen.

This mag ended up being one big series of phone-a-friend. Our Mise en Place columnist and now resident bar artist Kate

Frick knew Elizabeth Daniel from when she ran the Myers Hotel Bar and suggested a collaboration. Liz is literally a professional thrifter and graciously offered up her extensive vintage kitsch collection, house, and backyard as the backdrop for this dream of a kiki. Local drag performers Jenna Stanwyck, Dirty Dorothy, Karmella Uchawi, Jenna Stanwyck, and Lana Luxx brought the glam and a “casual soda-pop-with-a-silly-straw slay.”

Kate and I spent the night before gathering items and making all the food you see in the photos. I got to be grill daddi for two hours, which is always a good time. The Pitch’s art director Cassondra Jones stopped by to referee and help curate the grill marks on some red hot franks. She also managed to zhuzh Kate’s primordial lime green Jell-O mold using whipped cream and maraschino cherries brushed with lip gloss (for that camera-ready shimmer). Let me just say food styling is no easy task, but somehow we managed to make everything pretty and edible.

Did we all need to be there? Probably not. But we wanted to be. This photoshoot transcended “work” and turned into a passion project for everyone involved. We all had a shared goal: to part the red sea and give these hard-working Queens the platform they deserve.

ICYMI, this magazine is a safe space.

Now, sissy that walk,

The Queens werk up an appetite. Pilsen Photo Co-op

Greg Razer knew when he stood up on the floor of the Missouri Senate on a Thursday in March that he could not prevent an act of great harm.

The Senate was about to vote to ban doctors in the state from performing gender-affirming surgeries or prescribing certain hormones and puberty-blocking drugs for youths. The bill would pass; Razer had no illusions about that. In a legislative chamber where Republicans outnumber Democrats 24 to 10, the bad stuff almost always passes.

But words still matter, and the Democratic senator from Kansas City had plenty to say.

His opening salvo was directed at Republicans.

“The party of small government is now telling parents what to do,” he said. “You are now the party of big government and government overreach, and I hope you realize that.”

He thanked his fellow Democrats for helping to filibuster the bill until its Republican sponsors agreed to some concessions that made it a little less terrible. He apologized to the parents of transgender youth for the lies and accusations they’d had to endure.

He called out gay, lesbian, and bisexual Missourians for complacency.

“I didn’t see enough of you in the halls of the Capitol during this fight,” he said. “So I am telling you now—it is time to wake up and rise up and fight against this next attack against who we are as human beings.”

“I’m sorry your government is doing this to you”

Four years ago, The Pitch profiled Razer

when, as a member of the Missouri House, he fought for LGBTQ+ equality. Razer grew up as a closeted gay kid in Cooter, Missouri—a farm town in the Bootheel.

“I know today, in every single House district in the state, there is some teenager thinking about ending their life because they don’t see a way that they can ever come out and be happy,” he said then. “I will fight for them as hard as I can.”

Back then, Razer was trying to coax the legislature to pass a law that would prevent employers, landlords, and others from discriminating against people because of their sexual orientation or gender identity.

He’s still working on that. But his job has become much darker and more urgent.

The Republican supermajority that controls state government has not fixed the state’s crumbling roads, adequately funded schools, or worked for better health outcomes for Missourians. Rather, it has fixated on expanding gun rights and banning abortions. But those missions are pretty much accomplished, and to be a Missouri Republican is meaningless without a wedge issue.

And so the party has zeroed in on—as Razer puts it—“a small number of misunderstood children” and their families— transgender youth.

First, they wanted to keep them from using the school bathrooms that aligned with their gender identity. Then they focused on keeping transgender girls from playing women’s sports.

Republicans in the Senate told Razer they would never go so far as to interfere with the medical care the youth were receiving. This year they did. In speeches on the Senate floor, they accuse the parents of transgender kids of child abuse. Razer worries about what next year will bring.

In his speech before the March 23 vote, he spoke directly to transgender kids.

“I’m sorry that your government is doing this to you,” he said. “I’m sorry I couldn’t do more to protect you.”

Razer and fellow Democrats filibustered the bill until Republicans agreed to allow youth currently receiving gender-affirming care to continue doing so and to allow the ban to expire in four years. But Razer acknowledged that some young people will not be able to access care in Missouri if the bill becomes law.

“I hope you live close enough to a border and your family has the resources to get you across a state line to receive the care you need,” he said.

A broadside attack

Razer escaped his closeted existence in the Bootheel by enrolling at the University of Missouri’s Columbia campus. That was where he came out as a gay man and represented Mizzou as Truman the Tiger, the school mascot. And he majored in history.

History is foundational for Razer. He knows how the events of Missouri’s past shaped the state into what it is today. He has studied the milestones of LGBTQ+ equality, and he keeps in touch with historians around the country.

Not surprisingly, Razer turned to history in his remarks on the Senate floor.

“The forces in this nation that sow bigotry and hatred and division, they’ve come after us many times,” he said. “And like today, they always win the first few battles, but never, ever, have they beaten us in a war. And this today is a declaration of war on our community. And just like every other time, we will win in the end.”

POLITICS

Were it not for what came next, Razer’s remarks should have served as consolation and inspiration for the people whose rights were about to be mauled by the Senate’s Republican majority.

What came next was a four-minute speech by Bill Eigel, a senator from St. Charles County with aspirations of winning the Republican nomination for governor.

“I just witnessed something that I thought I would never see,” Eigel said. “And that is, a member of this body calling for adults to mutilate children by leaving the borders of this state to avoid the protections that we are about to institute in this state to protect the most vulnerable among us.”

It was a broadside attack on a fellow senator, breathtakingly uncivil and cruel. But when I ask Razer about it, he shrugs it off.

“I was turned in my chair, watching,” he says. “I don’t know how good my poker face was. Because that was ridiculous, that was a campaign stunt. By the next morning, they had turned that into a gubernatorial Facebook ad. That’s all that was.”

The way Razer sees it, most of the uproar over transgender people in Missouri and elsewhere is performative. That’s why he worked so hard to get a sunset amendment into the Senate bill; he figures that when the ban expires in four years, the right-wing will have moved onto some other cause.

But in the meantime, Razer has to maintain somewhat collegial relationships in order to have any impact in the Senate.

He says he works well with “virtually all” of the Republicans. He genuinely likes some of them.

One of Razer’s friends is Holly Thompson Rehder, a Republican senator whose district encompasses parts of southeast Missouri, not far from where Razer grew up. Thompson Rehder has detailed her climb out of a hardscrabble childhood in a memoir titled “Cinder Girl,” while Razer has spoken candidly about feeling suicidal in high school because of the denial of his sexuality.

“I joke with her all the time,” Razer says. “I tell her, ‘Holly, when you stand up, I know I’m going to either agree 100 percent or I’m going to disagree 100 percent. But we’ve kind of bonded, both of us being from Southeast Missouri. I have a lot of respect for her.”

That works both ways, Thompson Rehder tells The Pitch. “Greg is really good about communicating,” she says. “We can have a conversation. We can disagree on 80% of it and still have a very productive conversation because that’s Greg.”

Protecting kids and respecting government

Daniel Bogard, a rabbi from St. Louis, fig-

Greg Razer blends in with the community at a local farmers’ market. Zach Bauman

ures he’s driven to Jefferson City 40 or 50 times since Republicans started targeting transgender kids a few years ago. Sometimes he takes his son, a trans child who is now 9, so that lawmakers can get a look at exactly who they are harming.

On those trips, the boy always asks to see the senator he calls “Razer.”

“There have been these moments where Greg has looked at my son and said, ‘I know this is scary, but I promise that I will protect you,’” Bogard says. “My son thinks it’s cool. I start crying.”

One day last session Daniel Bogard was about to talk to a Republican lawmaker. He didn’t want his son to overhear.

“They often say such hurtful, awful, violent things in those meetings,” Bogard said.

Razer stepped in: “I’ll take him with me.”

Later, Bogard received a text of a photo. His beaming son was seated at the dais in the front of the Senate.

“It’s one of the things that Greg does,” Bogard says. “He makes sure these kids who are being abused by their government come to Jefferson City and also are celebrated. It’s a little bit magical.”

Razer has already told me about that day.

“I was thinking, ‘I do not want this kid to leave this building thinking this is a place where bad people are doing bad things,” he says.

He was showing the boy his desk when he noticed a Republican senator whom he considers a friend, Lincoln Hough from Springfield, at the dais.

“I texted him and asked if we could come up,” Razer recounts.

Hough, who votes with the Republican majority in favor of restricting rights and care for transgender children, lifted the boy up and showed him how to push the buttons that indicate when a senator can speak.

“He gets to run the Senate for a minute,” Razer says. “He’s the cutest kid you ever saw, by the way.”

Someone snapped a photo of Razer and the boy that day. It’s now blown up, poster size, in the child’s bedroom.

“Most kids have Superman or Spiderman on their wall,” Bogard says. “My son has a picture of Greg Razer.”

What’s striking about that story isn’t just Razer’s determination to protect a child; it’s his wish to preserve some respect for the Missouri government.

“The next generation has to believe that good government is still possible, that the republic still works. That good people can be involved,” Razer says. “I’m not religious. That’s not who I am. But that building and those traditions…they hold that sort of value to me.”

Missouri at a crossroads

Razer and I meet at a Waldo coffee shop

on a Friday afternoon in April. He orders his coffee extra strong. He’s been to a ceremonial function in the morning, then attended the Downtown Council’s annual luncheon and met with Gov. Mike Parson’s nominee for the Board of Police Commissioners.

Razer enjoys those parts of his job. He loves representing Kansas City and thinks it’s on a roll.

While we talked, he was fielding calls and texts from media outlets inside and outside of Missouri. The day before, Missouri Attorney General Andrew Bailey issued an executive order that, if carried out, would basically stop most gender-affirming care in the state, even for adults. And the Missouri House had passed a bill restricting transgender health care that was even more restrictive than the Senate’s.

In a better world, Razer says, he wouldn’t be the go-to senator to push back against this assault on LGBTQ+ rights. He’d like to be having intellectual debates on the Senate floor with Holly Thompson Rehder and Lincoln Hough about things like rebuilding Interstate 70 and keeping schools open five days a week.

“And what have we done this year?” he asks. “We tried to ban Black history, or at least thinking too deeply about it. And we beat up on trans kids.”

Next year, Razer plans to run for a second four-year term. That would give him five more years in the Missouri Senate.

Razer thinks that period will be crucial. If the group of anti-government legislators that calls itself the “conservative caucus” grows in size and influence, and if they are joined by a governor even more reactionary than Parson, “then truly facts don’t matter,” Razer says. “We don’t care if the government keeps its doors open or not.”

On the other hand, five years is long enough for sanity to make a partial comeback.

“I’m optimistic that we’ve hit rock bottom,” Razer says.

Optimism is an elusive commodity for outnumbered Democrats in the Missouri Senate. To preserve his, Razer turns—of course—to history.

Let’s go back to that speech on the Senate floor. At the conclusion, Razer spoke to transgender Missourians. What their government was doing was horrible, he said. But the history of the gay rights movement shows that attempts to marginalize groups ultimately open the door to acceptance.

“People were sitting around the dinner table last night talking about who transgender Missourians are and what their rights should be,” he says. “And the more people talk, the more people begin to humanize you. The day will come when this vote is another stain on our state. But tomorrow, you and I will be proud Missourians.”

BY THE BOOK

KC BANNED CONVERSION THERAPY, BUT POLITICAL COWARDICE TOOK A BIGGER STAND

By Tyler Schneider

On Monday, April 3, 2023, the Jackson County Legislature had—after numerous failed attempts across three official meetings, a public hearing, and three different versions of the bill—finally passed a conversion therapy ban for minors in Ordinance 5731, becoming the first county in Missouri to take such a stance.

It seems pretty reasonable today to wonder how this Biblically archaic, Pencean sham shouldn’t have already been banned by the powers that be long ago. So why did this ban, which ended up passing unanimously, require so much time and effort to finally enshrine at the county level?

Interference, both from outside and within the legislature itself, as well as some instances of poor timing aligned to slow an outcome that first-term 1st district legislator Manny Abarca still believes turned out 100% favorable in the end.

“As it was presented to me, I think at first initiated by my colleague, Jalen Anderson (1st District At-Large), and honestly my former [Democratic primary] opponent, Justice Horn, it was a concept that I supported, but the practicality of the legislation needed some modification and fixing. So that’s when I really stepped in, and kind of took the reins on it,” Abarca says.

A brief history of evil

The legislation itself defines conversion therapy as “any practice or treatment that seeks to change an individual’s sexual orientation or gender identity,” and which may include “efforts to change behaviors or gender expressions” of a minor.

Also known as “reparative therapy,” this putrid, mongrel spur of actual evidence-based psychology can trace its roots back to at least 1899 when German psychologist Albert von Schrenck-Notzing claimed he had successfully “turned” a gay man straight after over 50 sessions of hypnosis (and several forced brothel trips).

Around this same time, for contrast,

Sigmund Freud believed that humans were born bisexual and that conditioning led to those becoming exclusively attracted to the same sex.

Starting in the 1950s and 1960s, the American Boomer conservative zeitgeist had, in some pockets, brought conversion therapy along with it. The practice had then, for the last three decades of the century, been rapidly dismantled and discredited by credible academia—and yet that still didn’t stop it from occurring.

One particularly disgusting historical

of conversion therapy programs and gay ministry organizations, folded after almost 40 years when President Alan Chambers admitted it was impossible to change one’s sexual orientation.

So far, a rather meager 21 states and the District of Columbia have banned the practice completely within their borders, with Minnesota joining the fold in April. Five states and Puerto Rico also have partial bans in place, with hundreds more coming at county and municipal levels nationwide.

when Ordinance 5711 failed despite a 5-1 vote after a procedural effort increased the number of votes required for passage from five to six. Abstaining from the vote were legislators DaRon McGee (4th District), Donna Peyton (2nd District At-Large), and Venessa Huskey (2nd District).

The lone detractor who didn’t hold out was Sean Smith (6th District)—one of the two Republican legislators alongside Jeanie Lauer (5th District). Smith objected to the consent agenda from the get-go and set forth a series of attempts to amend parts of the language of the legislation even prior to that deciding 5-1 roll-call vote.

The first vote ushered by Smith failed with just two ‘yes’ votes from himself and Peyton, who had seconded the motion.

About 15 minutes in, Lauer levied a question aimed at Smith’s intentions: “Just so I am very clear, I’m tracking the specific changes that you want to make… and so you’re taking out ‘LGBTQ’ and inserting the word ‘vulnerable’?”

“Correct,” Smith replied, adding that “there are references to LGBTQ elsewhere.”

Smith stumbled through some more questioning before making two more attempts that failed to a lack of a second as Peyton changed course.

footnote here concerns the evil cousin of conversion therapy—aversion therapy, which were practices that sought to create conditions of disgust within a homosexual when they saw stimulating material such as photographs of their same-sex lover or when forced to view gay pornography in a laboratory setting or to cross-dress in those same conditions. As these victims faced their selected torture method, they were administered a chemical that induced vomiting.

Those were the despicable lengths some have gone take to change someone’s sexual orientation against their own will.

A swift and compelling nail in the coffin for conversion therapy came in 2013, when Exodus International, an overarching group connected with a network

Progress on this issue has played out marginally slower closer to home. Kansas City first outlawed conversion therapy as a municipality in Nov. 2019, while Independence waited two years before following suit. In Johnson County, Roeland Park and Prairie Village have bans enacted, with the average fines ranging from $500 to $1,000 for those who fail to comply.

Political squabbles

The latest Jackson County Legislature now has six of its nine members in their seats for the first time. Seven of them are Democrats, and the majority of them, for the first time ever, are from a minority background.

Of the three meetings in question, the most eventful was the first on March 20,

“You started seeing some of the political underhandedness that ultimately led to the first failure of this vote,” Abarca says. “And so, the question around this was, ‘Is this really just about banning conversion therapy?’”

Discussion on the floor started to boil between Smith and Anderson as the latter took hold of his peers’ attention to delivering a passionate account of his time being put through a conversion therapy program while attending a now-closed institution in Independence when he was between the ages of 12 and 14.

“I went through bible classes, I read the entire bible, and I was tested on it. And they made sure I hated myself! Because they told [me I] was gay,” Anderson said. “I went to a private Christian school, and that

“You started seeing some of the political underhandedness that ultimately led to the first failure of this vote. And so, the question around this was, ‘Is this really just about banning conversion therapy?’”

Illustration by Hugo Juarez-Avalos

pastor there said, ‘We cannot have you be a sissy!’”

Anderson explained that he, who identifies as a straight male, was rounded up along with three other youths who were gay and who all would eventually take their own lives following the experience. This ordinance saves lives, Anderson explained in a raised voice. Why wait on saving lives?

In spite of this appeal, the ordinance behind the ban was shelved for another week, to be reintroduced March 27. It then took another full session to finally get matters on agreeable terms.

The medium versus the message

While the proven harm conversion therapy leaves etched on its victims both mentally and physically is not up for debate, determining just how prevalent this brand new crime in Jackson County is, or historically has been, is a bit less clear-cut.

“I never could identify an entity or a person that had been victimized here in recent years. So that was the subject of much discussion as well—‘who are we really impacting with this right now?’ Or are we sending a signal? Which I think can be powerful as well,” Abarca says. “Whether it’s a symbolic gesture or not, we’re telling those who are in this business and, frankly, faith leaders that are really utilizing this to impact folks’ lives, and saying that it’s not going to be tolerable in Jackson County.”

At the very root of it, Abarca thought the fine print needed to at least add up to something that was enforceable in some practical, measurable ways. Rushing the bill out without considering a number of implications and adjusting the language accordingly can sometimes do as much harm as good. This is especially the case in a Show Me State legislature that is stocked from top to bottom with a GOP supermajority, with Palpatine levels of seemingly limitless power.

Abarca offers one such example of a factor that he and his fellow legislators had to consider carefully if they were to indeed set this precedent for the state: “If I’m banning a medical procedure, which is what some have called conversion therapy, what is to say then that the right-wing can’t come in and say, ‘Well, I’m banning abortion in Jackson County’—a medical procedure?”

The version of the bill that ultimately passed April 3 had originally been introduced by Anderson and co-sponsored by Abarca. In addition to listing a $500 fine (and no jail time) for violations, the legislature-approved final product included a stipulation that $4,000 be allocated towards notifying the public, which included ads in local press and additional media.

A crucial consideration, Abarca says, were added revisions that would prevent organizations who employ individuals convicted of practicing conversion therapy

from receiving future funding from Jackson County indefinitely.

“When we added the layer of the lifetime ban for those who can who are convicted of this or their staff to be stripped of county funding—that in essence did what the Republicans are doing in retaliation— we prevented organizations from being supported, and that that was not previously in the legislation,” Abarca says. “So those revisions, I think, made this a very strong and enforceable mechanism and not just alone that warm fuzzy feeling.”

Another section of the ban puts in place procedures through which survivors can seek justice if they so choose. This was another portion that Abarca said the legislature needed to get just right. In general, modernizing the county’s infrastructure and communications systems to communicate more directly with constituents was a talking point across the board in the last few election cycles. These efforts include said reporting system.

Progressivism in red

Missouri continues to garner pretty low scores on nearly all credible metrics for LGBTQIA+ inclusivity; this downward slide seems to be increasing thanks to recent action by state legislators. And yet, this conversion therapy ban in Jackson County is still a big deal, a metric through which the current crop of legislators can gauge the difficulty of further progressive action for marginalized groups.

While the GOP chokehold on the state seems set to continue for the foreseeable future, it’s important that, even for a county legislature that is perhaps as far left as it’s ever been, legislators understand the incrementality of change and toe the line accordingly.

Abarca, definitely one of the most progressive sitting legislators—along with Anderson, who may in some metrics have him beat—cites Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez, a politician whom he says he loves and often agrees with, as an example.

“Government is not reactionary at the moment. If [AOC] said less and worked behind the scenes more, she would likely accomplish more,” Abarca says.

“You have the advocates for doing work that is hard, that are getting no credit for the work and the action—then you have social media panderers who are just doing snippets, they’re doing stage time,” Abarca says. “They’re doing strategic images to appear to have done everything or be in the leadership of these efforts. And that’s unfortunately where folks can buy momentum from those that don’t understand the true processes”

After all the pontificating and politicking, once the ban was finally passed, if only for a moment or two, all nine legislators were able to reflect on justice being served—a successful step forward.

By

Pride

June 2

Pride Kickoff NEON Party w/ VCMN, Lucia

June 3

Lawrence PRIDE, Downtown Lawrence Out with the Current, Children’s Mercy Park

KC Rainbow Tour Launch Party, Kansas City Museum

Queer Bar Takeover, J. Rieger & Co. Trixie Mattel, KC Live!

June 4

NUBIA: A Brave New World Tour, The Folly Theater

Hot Pink: But I’m A Cheerleader, Screenland Armour

June 9

Friday Night Lights: Super Queeroes, Gaels Public House & Sports

June 9-11

KC PrideFest 2023, Frank A. Theis Park

June 11

Juneteenth

May 31 - June 19

JuneteenthKC Film Festival, Screenland

Armour

June 3

JuneteenthKC 6th Annual Cultural Parade, 18th & Vine District

June 16

Juneteenth National Independence Day: The Story Behind Our Newest Federal Holiday, Harry S. Truman Historic Site

June 17

BlaKCK MarQet Juneteenth Festival, 1801 Quindaro Blvd. (KCK)

3rd Annual Juneteenth Freedom Celebration, Harmon Park (Prairie Village)

Juneteenth: A Black Roots Reunion, Burcham Park (Lawrence)

Juneteenth Twilight Parade & Festival, Haymarket Square (Leavenworth)

4th Annual Advocacy & Awareness Peace

March & Rally: A Juneteenth Celebration, Thompson Park (Overland Park)

JuneteenthKC Heritage Festival: The Homecoming, 18th & Vine District The festival will be returning for its 12th year in the historic 18th & Vine District. With performances from Gospel Jubilee, Kim Keys & Loc’d, Sir Charles, and many more, JuneteenthKC’s festival will highlight Black artists at the American Jazz Museum Atrium hosted by Black Space Black Art. Admission is free and includes family activities such as face painting and pony rides. You can download the mobile app for the festival to stay up to date on the vendors and event lineup.

June 17-18

Juneteenth Celebration, Downtown Lawrence

June 19

“Juneteenth: Faith & Freedom” Dinner, Documentary and Discussion, 20 E Gregory Blvd.

OUTside Voices KC: True Colors, Community Christian Church

June 16

Royals Pride Night, Kauffman Stadium

June 17

6th Annual Pride Bar Crawl, John’s Big Deck

Deja’s PRIDE Cabaret, Maceli’s Banquet Hall & Catering

June 17-18

Disney PRIDE in Concert, Kauffman Center for the Performing Arts Immerse yourself in a Disney-inspired multimedia celebration of LGBTQIA+ life and love at Disney PRIDE in Concert. Featuring the Heartland Men’s Chorus, the family-friendly concert will draw inspiration from classic Disney films like The Lion King and Mary Poppins, as well as modern sensations like Coco, and Zootopia. Along with the 150-member chorus, the show will feature a 25-piece orchestra, accompanied by animations from Disney and Pixar films and personal stories from chorus members connected to the meaning in their musical selections.

June 18

2023 Pride Celebration, Warren Place Venue (Gardner, KS)

June 24

Pride on Vine 3, 18th and Vine District Independence Pride ‘23, Englewood Arts District

The Pitch Staff & Pilsen Photo Co-op

June 26

Ragazza Pride Brunch, Ragazza

July 8

Queer Bar Takeover, The Black Box

July 29

Jinkx Monsoon: “Everything at Stake,” The Folly Theater

4th Of July

July 1

Osawatomie’s Lights on the Lake 2023, Osawatomie, KS

Stars & Stripes Celebration, Knuckleheads

Mozingo 4th of July Celebration, Mozingo Lake Recreation Park

Independence Day, Baldwin City Golf Course

Red, White & Blue Springs, Blue Springs South High Smithville Fireworks Show, Smith’s Fork Park

Mahaffie’s Independence Day, Mahaffie Stagecoach

Stop & Farm

July 2

#5 Patriotic Concert in the Park, Indian Creek Rec Center

Red, White and BOOMbox, Kansas City Live Block

July 3

SummerFest 2023, Douglas County Fairgrounds

Stars and Stripes Picnic, National WWI Museum and Memorial Red, White and Baseball, Kauffman Stadium

July 4

4th of July Fireworks, DeSoto Riverfest Park

4th of July Celebration, Platte County Courthouse

Lenexa Freedom Run, Lenexa, KS

Community Days Parade, Lenexa, KS CarrollTON’S of Fun Day, Carrollton Recreation Park

Stilwell KS 4th of July Parade, Stilwell, KS

Star Spangled Spectacular, Corporate Woods Office Park

Platte City 4th of July, Platte City, MO

Ward Parkway Four on the Fourth, Ward Parkway

July 4th Fireworks, College Boulevard Activity Center

July 6

Family Fun Nights- 1860s Fireworks, Mahaffie Stagecoach Stop & Farm

Stages

June 3

Beartooth & Trivium, Uptown Theater

All Time Low, The Midland

RadFest Volume I, Lemonade Park Radkey presents RadFest Volume I at Lemonad(e) Park. The first volume of RadFest includes a taste of rock bands Radkey, The Phantastics, The Many Colored Death, Drop a Grand, and more. The bands’ origins range from Columbia to St. Louis, and of course, Kansas City, providing crowd members a variety of sounds from across the region. Advance tickets are $25 and $30 at the door. The concert is 18+, and minors can attend with an adult. Doors will open on 1628 Wyoming Street at 4:30 p.m Show starts at 6 p.m.

June 5

Shakey Graves, The Truman

June 8

ILLENIUM, Azura Amphitheater

June 9

Black Joe Lewis and The Honeybears, Knuckleheads

Summer Concert on the Lawn, Kansas City Museum

June 10

Luke Combs, GEHA Field at Arrowhead Stadium

Taylor Tomlinson, The Midland

Raytown Live!: Package Band, Greenspace in Town Center

Nintendo Rave, Granada Blues Fest, Legacy Park Amphitheater

June 11

Weezer, Azura Amphitheater

June 13

Nickel Creek with Special Guest Gaby

Moreno, Kauffman Center for the Performing Arts

June 14

Dancefestopia: Yellow Brick Road, AURA

June 15

Gov’t Mule, Grinders KC

June 16

Dillon Francis, Kansas City Live Block Coors Light and Mix 93.3 host music producer Dillon Francis and special guest Rossy at KC Live! Dillon Francis (aka DJ Hanzel) is best known for hit songs like “Get Low, Bun Up the Dance” and his work with Skrillex, Calvin Harris, A-Trak, DJ Snake, and other popular EDM artists. Electronic artist Rossy is from Liberal, Kansas, and is currently on tour. Her sound combines elements of classical music and trap, making Rossy and Francis a dynamic electronic pair. Doors will open at 7 p.m. at Kansas City Power & Light District on 110 E. 13th St. The event is 21+.

June 18

Matchbox Twenty, Starlight

June 21

Summer Concert Series: Madisen Ward, Crossroads Hotel Kansas City

June 23

Intocable, The Midland

Jonathan McReynolds: “My Truth” Tour, The Madrid

#IMomSoHard: Ladies’ Night, Liberty Hall

June 24

Fall Out Boy - So Much For (Tour) Dust, Azura Amphitheater

June 27

Dirty Heads, Grinders KC Alesana, recordBar

June 28

Pallbearer, recordBar

June 30

Kansas City Reggae Music/Jerk Festival, Berkley Riverfront

July 1

Young The Giant with Milky Chance, Starlight

July 2

Between the Buried and Me, The Truman

July 7-8

Taylor Swift, GEHA Field at Arrowhead Stadium

For those lucky enough to secure tickets, Taylor Swift is bringing her recordbreaking Eras Tour to Arrowhead Stadium for two unforgettable nights. With a three-hour set that takes you through Swift’s entire musical career, it’s safe to say that she is doing it like nobody else. You officially have bragging rights. Swift has been in the game for over a decade now and hasn’t been on tour since 2018, so she’s making up for lost time with four albums never performed live.

July 8

Billy Bob Thornton & The Boxmasters, Knuckleheads

Raytown Live!: Brass Rewind, Greenspace in Town Center

July 11

Gogol Bordello, The Truman

July 14

Summer Concert on the East Lawn, Kansas City Museum

July 16

Killer Queen - A Tribute to Queen, Uptown Theater

July 18

Foreigner, Starlight

July 19

Shania Twain: Queen Of Me Tour, T-Mobile Center

July 21

The Backseat Lovers, Grinders KC

July 22

Ann Wilson of Heart & Tripsitter, Uptown Theater

July 25

Death Grips, The Midland

YUNGBLUD: The World Tour, Uptown Theater

July 27

Kansas, The Midland

July 29

An Orchestral Rendition of Dr. Dre: 2001, The Truman

August 1

Goth Babe, The Truman

August 2

The Front Bottoms, Grinders KC

August 4

Ween, Grinders KC

August 5

Ed Sheeran, GEHA Field at Arrowhead Stadium

Orville Peck, Uptown Theater

Famed for performing faceless in his signature fringed mask and cowboy hat, South African country music artist Orville Peck will be gracing KC with his presence late this summer. Peck has broken boundaries in the music industry by gaining a fanbase without showing his face while also speaking about his experience as being an openly gay man in the country music scene. His music stays true to classic country themes of longing and heartbreak but incorporates subtle themes of Peck’s experience with his own sexuality and masculinity. If you haven’t gotten into Orville Peck yet, the song “C’mon Baby, Cry” from his latest album Bronco is a great introduction. Don’t miss Peck’s performance at the Uptown Theater on Saturday, Aug 5. Tickets start at $35.

August 10

Ben Folds, Uptown Theater Spitalfield, Encore Room

August 11

Q104’s Yallapalooza starring Parker McCollum, Azura Amphitheater horsegirl, The Bottleneck

August 12

Raytown Live!: Lucidity, Greenspace in Town Center Bully, The Bottleneck

August 17

The Wallflowers, Uptown Theater

August 18

Sylvan Esso, The Midland

August 19

Billie Joel & Stevie Nicks, GEHA Field at Arrowhead Stadium

Trey Kennedy, The Midland Incubus, Azura Amphitheater

August 25

Weyes Blood, The Truman The Black Keys, Starlight

August 26

Taking Back Sunday, Kansas City Live Block

August 27

Goo Goo Dolls with O.A.R., Starlight

August 30

Zach Bryan, T-Mobile Center The Mega-Monsters Tour: Gojira, Mastodon & Lorna Shore, Azura Amphitheater

September 5 Tash Sultana, VooDoo Lounge

September 6

Poppy & PVRIS, The Truman

Movies

June 14

BASEketball (25th Anniversary), Screenland Armour

June 9

Transformers: Rise of the Beasts, Theatrical Strays, Theatrical

June 16

The Flash, Theatrical Elemental, Theatrical

The Blackening, Theatrical Extraction 2, Netflix

June 20

South Beach Shark Club, VOD/Digital

June 23

No Hard Feelings, Theatrical Asteroid City, Theatrical

Follow director Wes Anderson into an eerily bright desert town in the 1950s for a space-inspired comedy drama. The film will tell the tale of a Junior Stargazer/ Space Cadet convention’s interruption by earth-shattering events that result in danger for attendees. The cast includes Brian Cranston, Tom Hanks, and Hong Chau—but that is just the beginning of the long list of top-tier actors featured in the film.

June 24

Rise, Disney+

June 26

Free State Festival, Various locations

June 27

R.A.D.A.R.: The Bionic Dog, VOD/Digital

June 30

Indiana Jones and the Dial of Destiny, Theatrical

Ruby Gilman, Teenage Kraken, Theatrical Harold and the Purple Crayon, Theatrical

July 7

Insidious: The Red Door, Theatrical Joy Ride, Theatrical The Out-Laws, Netflix

July 12

Mission Impossible: Dead Reckoning Part

One, Theatrical

July 14

Theater Camp, Theatrical

July 21

Barbie, Theatrical

The highly-anticipated Barbie live-action movie will feature heartthrobs Margot Robbie as the iconic namesake plastic doll, and Ryan Gosling as Ken, her love interest. Barbie is directed by Greta Gerwig, the Oscar-nominated director of Lady Bird (2017), and will follow Barbie on her adventure through the human world after she is expelled from BarbieLand for not being perfect enough. The film boasts a $100 million production budget and a star-studded cast, including Will Ferrel, Dua Lipa, Issa Rae, Helen Mirren, and more.

Oppenheimer, Theatrical They Cloned Tyrone, Netflix

July 25

Once Upon a Time in Uganda, VOD/Digital

July 27

Happiness For Beginners, Netflix

July 28

Haunted Mansion, Theatrical

August 4

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Mutant Mayhem, Theatrical Meg 2: The Trench, Theatrical

August 11

Gran Turismo, Theatrical The Last Voyage of the Demeter, Theatrical Heart of Stone, Netflix

August 18

Back on the Strip, Theatrical Blue Beetle, Theatrical Please Don’t Destroy, Theatrical The Hill, Theatrical

August 25

White Bird, Theatrical They Listen, Theatrical Lift, Netflix

Vacation Friends 2, Hulu

September 1

The Equalizer 3, IMAX

Arts & Exhibits

June 3-4

Midwest Design and Furniture Fair, Overland Park Convention Center

June 9-10

Sugar Creek Slavic Festival 2023, Mike Onka Memorial Hall

June 10

Sexhibition: Rated Art, Weinberger Fine

Art

Weinberger Fine Art and Habitat

Contemporary present the second, sensually immersive experience of Sexhibition: Rated Art. The sexy safe space welcomes you to erotic works of art through visuals, music, and performance. Artists including Gerry Trilling, Winton Kidd, Jared Horman, and many more contribute to its creation. Featured performances are provided by R&B artist Stephonne Singleton, performance art collective Quixotic, and DJ Rico Dejoia. Cellar Rat, Aquesto Estila de Vida tequila, and Boulevard Brewing Co. will offer drinks to quench your thirst while Shroom catering settles your appetite with sweet treats. The 18+ event starts at 7 p.m.

June 13

Open Art Night, Henry’s Upstairs

June 23

Concert & Movie Night, Hyde Park Downtown OP Art Fair, Downtown Overland Park

July 8

Art Garden KC, Berkley Riverfront Park

July 8

KC Children’s Urban Book Fair, Bruce R. Watkins Cultural Heritage Center

July 14-16

KantCon 2023, Overland Park Convention Center

August 13

816 Day: For The Love Of The City, 18th & Vine District

The day the city honors itself is back this year on Sunday, August 13, starting at 9 a.m. In the historic 18th & Vine Jazz District, this is a celebration the whole family can enjoy with everything from fitness and health, live music performances, dance, fashion, art, and more. This year they will highlight “The Horn Section” with performances by musicians who specialize in horns. There will be vendors, food trucks, a kids’ play zone, DJs, and more.

August 18

The 44th Annual Ethnic Enrichment Festival, Swope Park

August 25-26

Kaw River Roots Festival, Downtown

Lawrence

Food & Drink

June 2

Festa Italiana, North Park at Zona Rosa

June 3

Global Neighbors & Flavors Fest, Lenexa Public Market

Bamboo Penny’s Thai New Year Celebration, Park Place

Hy-Vee SummerFest, Belton Memorial Park

Vaile Mansion Strawberry Festival, Independence, MO

June 10

Don’t Make Them Wait Food Truck Festival, Douglas County Fairgrounds

June 16-17

Boulevardia 2023, Grand Boulevard at Crown Center

Kansas City’s beer, food, and music street fest of the summer is returning for its ninth year the weekend of June 16 and 17. “Boulevardians” will be able to sip on Boulevard Brewing Co. beer and Quirk seltzers, indulge in a variety of cuisines, and enjoy a robust entertainment lineup including local, regional, and national artists. Friday night performances will feature John Isbell and the 400 Unit, The War and Treaty, and The Beths, to name a few. You can catch Surfaces, Grandson, K.Flay, and Big Freedia onstage Saturday night. The two-day fest has something for everyone, including a Podcast Stage, silent discos, and Taps and Tastes—a beer and food-tasting event featuring more than 50 national and international craft breweries. Get tickets and more information at boulevardia.com

June 21

KC Bier Company Giveback Event, Kansas City Bier Company

June 23

Great Lenexa BBQ Battle, Sar Ko Par Trails Park

June 30

Happy Basset’s 3rd Annual BBQ Competition, Happy Basset Barrel House

Wellness

June 8

Northland Vaccination Clinic, 5340 NE Chouteau Trfy.

June 10

Golden Health Presents Brunch, Dip and Sip, 100 Northeast Tudor Rd. (Lee’s Summit)

June 17

Health Fair, St. Pauls’ Episcopal Church

KCK

June 18

Dog Days, Powell Gardens

June 21

Music Bingo for a Cause: I Support the Girls & No Shame, Servaes Brewing Co.

June 22

2023 Pitch Golf Tournament, Painted HIlls Golf Club

June 24

1st Annual Ride for Mental Health, Sandy’s Restaurant (Blue Springs)

June 25

Yoga + Wellness + Mimosa, Colonial Gardens

July 1

July Wellness Weekend at the Historical Downtown Liberty Farmers Market, Liberty Square

July 22

Under the Stars: A Wellness Retreat, The Elms Hotel & Spa

August 3

The Elms Spa Annual Back to School Charity Event, The Elms Hotel & Spa

June 24-25

Kaw Valley Wine Rally, Wellsville, KS

June 30-July 1

3rd Annual BBQ Competition, Topeka, KS

Makers

Now Available

Out In The Sticks

June 3rd

Wine in the Wild, Sunset Zoo (Manhattan, KS)

June 2-10

Wichita Riverfest, Wichita, KS

June 9-10

Sedalia Hot Air Balloon and Kite Festival, Missouri State Fairgrounds (Sedalia, MO)

June 14

Downtown St. Joseph Sculpture Walk, Allied Arts Council (St. Joseph, MO)

June 17

Wichita Taco Fest, Wichita, KS

June 17-25

Sunflower Music Festival, White Concert Hall (Topeka, KS)

June 23-25

Anime Festival Wichita 2023, Hyatt Regency Wichita

July 13-15

2023 Country Stampede, Heartland Motorsports Park (Wakarusa, KS)

July 14

49th Anniversary of the Ozark Music Festival, Puzzle Pieces Smoke Emporium (Sedalia, MO)

Hot Girl Summer & Summertime bundle, Effing Candle Co.

Hot Girl Summer (with notes of watermelon lemonade) is the latest candle drop from Effing Candle Co. For a limited time, get four candles for $100 as part of the Summertime Bundle with featured scents: Hot Girl Summer, You Effing Matter, A Ray of Effing Sunshine, and Rooftop Margarita. Available at effingcandle.co

May Flowers Collection, MADE MOBB

MADE MOBB, a local apparel brand based in KC, has teamed up with Lily Floral Designs to launch its latest collection called “May Flowers,” featuring a range of tees adorned with vibrant floral prints, patterns, and a simple yet powerful message: “Give Your People Flowers While They’re Here.” Available online and in stores.

June 17

Batch #17 Chili Oil, J Chang.Kitchen

Each batch of J Chang.Kitchen chili oil is uniquely hand-made, hand-bottled, handlabeled, and hand-packed by James Chang and his family. All batches are gluten-free, vegan, and dairy-free and contain no additional additives or preservatives. Batch #17 has a heavy emphasis on garlic and can be ordered online at www.jchangkitchen.square.site

you can find just about anything you need for an anachronistic photo montage... and then some.

When The Pitch initially spoke to Daniel, her home was in the midst of transformation for our cover shoot. Need your backyard turned into a cookout ad straight from the ‘60s/’70s? Daniel is your best bet. While setting up for the shoot, it was as if she could read everyone’s mind. Daniel would pop in with an “I have one of those in my garage” before ever being asked, and sure enough, it would meet the exact vision.

That probably leaves you wondering what her garage looks like, and it is perhaps the perfect glance into Daniel’s brain. Brass animals, funky light fixtures, Persian rugs, and eclectic multi-textured couches displayed in ways that might look disorganized to some—to her, it’s an elaborate, intentional game of Tetris.

“I was just volunteering and doing art classes at the library, but I didn’t officially have a job anymore,” says Daniel of her

lowing, Daniel started to discover that she could find and create pieces that other people would find value in. Using her Facebook group, Daniel started to create themed photoscapes to display the items she had collected and was selling.

“I think that the magic of it all is, you know, what makes people want to shop at places like Target is that it’s staged, right?” says Daniel. “So it takes the guesswork out of it for people. That’s basically what I’m doing—but make it vintage.”

Along with curating vignettes using antiques and secondhand items, Daniel also creates original artwork to match a theme she wants to convey.

“We went on a vacation to Graceland and saw Elvis’ house, so I did a jungle room theme. I usually have like 10 themes that I’m working on at any given time.”

When asked about her art, Daniel spoke about a mural she did in a local bar and the different forms she dabbles in.

“I obviously love painting and working

with that medium, but I’d say I’m happiest when I can find a vintage piece that I can fix

Daniel has one main goal: to get people to thrift more. A firm believer that you can find anything secondhand, she believes her work can inspire others to do their own vintage shopping, find the things that would otherwise end up on the curb, and turn them into home decor treasures.

Daniel explains that her Facebook group feels like a circle of friends who she just happens to shop for. If someone buys from her a few times, she’s able to gauge their style. Some of them even reach out for advice on how they should decorate parts of their home.

“They feel like old friends, and they can always find me again,” says Daniel.

As far as her favorite personal find, Daniel has the answer instantly.

“I own a Peter Max,” she says—her excitement, as we sit in the ‘sherage,’ is palpable. “I grew up obsessed with Peter Max. When I found it, I couldn’t believe it.”

Some people might feel less-than-confident about secondhand shopping: This person can find such great stuff at thrift

stores, but when I go, I only find beat-up old couches, and if I’m lucky, a niche t-shirt. What am I doing wrong?

Daniel has some advice for that.

“If you like it, it’s worth it. Even if it was from Home Goods a year ago, you’re still doing the world a favor by taking it when someone else didn’t want it,” she says.

It doesn’t necessarily have to be vintage in order to be cool, and that’s what sets Daniel apart.

“I want them to be secondhand. The whole point is that something was maybe going to end up at the landfill. If someone doesn’t find it, then I can give it a new life and decorate my own house in a really cute way,” Daniel says.

Elizabeth Daniel Art & Decor Elizabethdaniel.com

Elizabeth Daniel - Decor (Facebook Group) @elizabethdanielartanddecor

Live Sales: Fridays @ 4 p.m. CST on Facebook Items in The Pitch’s Summer Guide photos are available for sale. Contact Elizabeth Daniel Art & Decor for all inquiries.

Elizabeth Daniel poses in her dining room with a retro landline phone. Pilsen Photo Co-op

SECONDHAND SALVATION AND DOMESTIC RESURRECTION IN ELIZABETH DANIEL’S PERSONAL BAZAAR

By Emma Hilboldt

Have an air-friendly summer!

Summer has arrived in the Kansas City region. And that means increased air pollution in the form of ozone and particulate matter.

Heat and sunlight convert solvent and gas fumes mixed with exhaust and smoke into ground-level ozone. Particulate matter can be produced from small focused sources, such as an individual fire or widespread events like fireworks on the Fourth of July. People exposed to the affected air can breathe in the particles and absorb them into their bloodstreams, causing potential heart and breathing issues.

“Poor air quality and ozone often can’t be seen, which makes outreach and education important,” said Karen Clawson, air quality program manager at the Mid-America Regional Council.

Clawson and the air quality team at MARC monitor ozone and particulate matter levels during ozone season. They also manage SkyCast, the ozone forecast for Greater Kansas City.

The SkyCast is issued each afternoon by 4 p.m. between March 1 and Oct. 31, when the Kansas City region is most likely to experience an ozone alert. When SkyCast issues an ozone alert, that means an unhealthy concentration of ozone pollution is predicted for the following day. It’s like a weather forecast for air quality conditions.

In addition to watching SkyCast, everyone can take steps to reduce ozone and particulate matter pollution. Altering driving habits is a good place to start. And with uncertain gas prices and free bus fares in Kansas City, now is the ideal time to explore other transportation options. Visit AirQKC.org for ways to improve air quality and visit RideShareKC.org for ride-matching and support resources, including the Guaranteed Ride Home program for carpoolers, transit riders and cyclists.

Follow the MARC educational resources online at AirQKC.org, @airqkc on Twitter.

Help keep your family and friends healthy this summer:

• Follow the SkyCast at AirQKC.org.

• When elevated pollution levels are predicted, consider scheduling outdoor activities before 10 a.m. or after 7 p.m.

• Tell your child’s caregivers about the SkyCast and the health risks of air pollution.

• Provide support to older adults, children and those with respiratory problems such as asthma or emphysema, as they are most often affected by air pollution.

• Use cruise control, avoid harsh stops and starts,

string multiple errands into one well-ordered trip and travel with a light load to increase your vehicle’s fuel efficiency.

• Wait until after sunset when filling up your gas tank and be sure to stop at the click, so the tank doesn’t overfill.

• Walk, bike, carpool or ride the bus to reduce emissions.

• Opt for electric lawn equipment when possible and avoid using starter fluids. Or, use a charcoal chimney or a natural gas grill.

Sponsored by the Mid-America Regional Council

I read a lot of harangues about how the internet has fractured our collective at tention span. friend told me that every couple of weeks, he forks over $75 to be alone in a dark, wet room with his thoughts.

By “room,” I mean a sensory deprivation tank—also known as an isolation tank or “float therapy.” The process is straightforward: you climb into a soundproof, lightproof box filled with salt water and lie there until nothing happens.

The technology isn’t new— the first tank was deployed in 1954—but I’d never given sensory deprivation much thought until recently. I had dismissed it as the exclusive domain of Californians and Michael Phelps. But over the last few years, sensory deprivation tanks have been sloshing their way across the KC metro—to Overland Park, Waldo, even the Northland.

“You should try it,” my friend said, and I demurred. I consider myself a sensory maximalist—I spend most days chasing the kind of stimulation that could take out a power plant. But there were other benefits, he assured me. “Some people experience ego death.”

I thought about that for a moment. It would be a mercy killing—I was sure of this—but it sounded demoralizing for everyone involved.

The most compelling argument turned out to be the simplest: I wanted to float.

Sensory deprivation tanks are generally divided into “float cabins” (essentially, flooded walk-in coolers) and much shallower “float pods” (an attractive option for anyone who has longed to swim in a coffin). Both varieties feature gently heated water gorged with Epsom salt for maximum buoyancy. The goal is for your body to float effortlessly upon the water’s surface, like a fleshy Fun Noodle.

This latter quality was especially appealing to me, a person who never learned to swim. On the contrary, I have long suspected that I harbor a subconscious urge to drown. Whenever I stick my head under water, I instinctively breathe in. I longed to know what it would be like to float without fearing The Urge.

I took the plunge. For my first experience, I booked a float pod at a River Market spa called aNu Aesthetics & Optimal Well-

SENSORY DEPRIVATION IS ANYTHING BUT

By Liz Cook

The pod bay was a gray-tiled private room with a small shower and a clinical aesthetic. The centerpiece was a white fiberglass pod the size of a double-wide tanning bed. I climbed in, pulled the pod door shut over me, and sank into the water. I’d been worried about feeling claustrophobic, but there was at least a foot of space between my head and the pod roof. If I closed my eyes—the pod was not, in fact, lightproof—I could pretend that I was floating in a room-temperature sea.

I’ve read that float therapy can be helpful for people with PTSD and body dysmorphia, in part because the lack of physical sensation allows you to forget that your body exists.

I’m not sure I’ve ever felt more conscious of my body than I was those first few minutes in the tank. Absent any other input, my brain seized on the feel of the Epsom salt softening my skin, the heaviness of my head, the faraway sound of my breathing when my ears bobbed beneath the surface. I felt like I had to work to keep my head above water, and I began to feel a prickle of The Urge. “They should give you a neck pillow for this,” I remember thinking crossly—and then I fell asleep.

I woke an hour later with a relaxed body and a stiff neck. I did not feel optimally well. But I did feel soft and slippery, like a slowly braised eel. It was only as I was dressing that I noticed the Grover-blue neck cushion lolling defiantly from a hook in the shower. White block letters on one side informed me that it was called a Nekdõõdle. I studied the International Phonetic Alphabet in college and have no idea how to pronounce this.

On my way out the door, an associate handed me some paperwork to sign attesting that I understood that the therapy I had just undertaken could be dangerous.

“How was it?” she asked. “I’ve been dying to try it, but this is actually our last day. We’re removing the pods tomorrow.”

“Fine,” I muttered darkly. I was still seething about the Nekdõõdle. “Wait. Why

I thought I might have better luck with the roomier float cabins, so I booked a second appointment at Floating KC—a three-cabin float spa that’s operated in Waldo since 2013. From the beginning, the experience was less sterile and much more spa-like, right down to the sensually lit changing room and plush robe.

I signed a paper promising that I had not anointed my body with forbidden creams, and a front desk associate whisked me to a room with a Himalayan salt lamp and the sort of hulking, overengineered massage chair you can only find at an airport Brookstone. Each float is preceded by a 30-minute chair massage, the associate explained. I nodded knowingly, though this had not been disclosed on the website.

I climbed into the chair and watched the room slip away as the chair tilted back with a hydraulic hiss. Blue-green LED lights swirled on the ceiling; the chair palpated each part of my berobed body in turn. I wasn’t sure how this experience squared with sensory deprivation—it felt like going to an IMAX on mushrooms—but I was willing to trust the process.

That massage was Phase One of my transition into deprivation. Phase Two was more restrained: an associate guided me to the float cabin and instructed me to shower in the (near) dark. The room was suffused with a soft green light and faint strains of music—the tinkly, New Age sort, where the tracks have titles like “Soul Dreams” or “Whale Orgasm.” The music and lights would play for five minutes, the associate informed me, before slowly fading away.

I nodded and locked the door behind him. I spent the next five minutes ransacking the room for a Nekdõõdle. I never found it, but I knew it was there.

When I climbed into the cabin and closed the door, the darkness was total. I’d put in earplugs, so the silence was, too. This time, my sensation-starved brain didn’t focus on my body. Instead, it spent the first five minutes trying to calculate how many other Kansas Citians had visited

At first, I tried not to fixate on the fact that I was steeping in the salted bathwater of a hundred other people. Then, I just gave in. In the right light—specifically, no light— it was almost romantic. To float is to add your seasoning to an endless human stew. It reminded me of the chef Enrique Olvera and his famous Mole Madre, simmering away for 2,500 days straight. I smiled at the thought. And then—once again—I fell asleep.

After the float, I called up Scott McCorkill, Floating KC’s manager of marketing and operations, to ask how the tanks were cleaned. He punctured my stew dreams immediately. Each tank has over 1,200 pounds of Epsom salt, he assured me—not a hospitable environment for bacteria—and the water is cycled through a “three-stage filtration process” (UV, particle, chemical) after each customer.

That’s good news, because the customer base is growing. McCorkill attributed some of that growth to a bounce-back from the pandemic. But he’s noted a spike in interest in sensory deprivation therapy over the last eight months.

“I see a lot of people who say they saw it on ‘Stranger Things’ or ‘The Big Bang Theory,’” McCorkill said. “And we have a lot more recidivism.”

He also (gently) corrected my terminology. The industry is moving away from “sensory deprivation” and toward “sensory reduction,” he told me. “It’s a better device to understand that we’re not depriving you of anything, we’re just reducing the stimulus.”

That sounded like marketing to me, but I liked the spin. “Deprivation” is an addict’s term, with some implicit assumptions—that we’re hopelessly wedded to stress and stimulation and need someone to take the punch bowl away. I suppose there’s something radical about “reduction”—about consciously deciding to experience less.

I’m back on my bullshit (hedonism) now, but don’t regret giving sensory austerity a try. Floating wasn’t a transcendent experience for me the way it seems to be for others. It didn’t make me experience ego death or disassociation or a dopamine rush. It did make me feel soft—in more ways than one.

I suppose there’s something radical about that, too.

It has been a month now since Missouri began approving licenses for dispensaries to sell recreational marijuana, and the state’s 200 dispensaries have already outpaced Illinois in recreational sales.

Medical marijuana has been legal in Missouri for three years now, and the legalization of recreational marijuana speaks to a certain validation or curiosity in its redemption following several decades of stigma.

The majority vote in favor of Amendment 3—which promises to expunge low-level drug offenses—speaks to the growing sentiment amongst Missourians that individuals should not be detained, cited, or arrested for minor possession of a drug now legal in more than 20 states. Although it is far from a perfect solution to the deeply problematic war on drugs that has been waging since the end of the ’60s, its approval reflects a growing affinity for a different approach toward drug regulation.

Whereas marijuana pertains more to symptom management, psychedelics—a specific type of psychoactive drug (like psilocybin, LSD, MDMA)—are following a similar trajectory. On a national scale, after several decades of suppression and neglect, research groups around the country, the most prominent being Johns Hopkins and NYU, are conducting clinical trials to recover something precious that has been lost in both science and culture.

Ketamine, much like the aforementioned psychedelics, holds potential in the realm of healing psychological disorders, particularly major depressive disorder, anxiety, trauma disorders, and chronic pain. This might come as a surprise to you, considering you might know ketamine as a party drug whose overindulgence ends in a dreaded K-hole. Or perhaps you know it as a horse tranquilizer, and in this case, you might request one when you learn that it’s used as a sedative on children, just the same. It’s F.D.A approved, so seriously, calm down.

OUTSIDE

Both are true (although both K-holes and anesthesia occur at significantly higher doses than administered in a therapeutic setting). Ketamine was synthesized by a researcher named Calvin Stevens in 1962. Stevens did consulting work for the pharmaceutical company Parke-Davis. He sought to replace the volatile PCP with an equally anesthetic, less unpleasant alternative.

Two years later, a doctor named Edward Domino conducted the first human trials of ketamine with men incarcerated at Jackson State Prison. Domino observed that ketamine, when administered at higher doses, completely knocked patients out. At lower doses, however, it produced psychoactive effects on otherwise lucid patients.

Parke-Davis did not want to characterize ketamine as a psychedelic, and Domino’s wife suggested the term “dissociative anesthetic” to describe the way the drug separates the mind from the body even as the mind retains consciousness.

Evidently, the term stuck. Despite ketamine’s ability to elicit psychedelic effects under the correct circumstances, it has enjoyed immunity from the stigmas and legal limitations imposed upon drugs like psilocybin and LSD. Following continued research, the National Institute of Mental Health concluded that a single intravenous dose of ketamine had rapid antidepressant effects in 2006.

Currently, the research and debate surrounding ketamine do not consider whether it can treat depression, as this reality is solidified. Rather, the focus is on the most effective delivery method and how drug companies and healthcare providers can best profit off an “off-label” drug.

Ketamine is what’s called a “dirty drug,” meaning that it acts on different parts of the brain at once. Several neuroscientific theories exist regarding its ability to lessen depression, and most acknowledge its effects on certain receptors in the

brain, particularly the neurotransmitter glutamate.

An individual ready to spend several hundred dollars who does not demonstrate active mania or psychosis, a predisposition to schizophrenia, or drug-seeking behaviors can access a wide array of ketamine treatments: a titrated dose given intravenously by a nurse practitioner in a private practice, an oral lozenge sent in the mail by a startup taking advantage of pandemic-era changes to the regulation of remote prescriptions (red flag!), or an insurance-covered, questionably effective nasal spray under the brand Spravato.

Beyond cost prohibitions, ketamine is widely accessible. It’s on the frontier of a renaissance in psychedelic medicine and perhaps a shift in medicine and science at wide.

“I like to do things I don’t know anything about,” says Kelly Funk regarding her experience with sublingual ketamine therapy. Funk’s background is in social work, but after an extended hiatus, she transitioned into life coaching as an intentional step away from the hierarchical dynamics associated with social work.

This hierarchy-averse, client-centered approach reappears among patients and practitioners of ketamine therapy. It’s a selling point for the visionaries and disillusioned, and it’s a source of skepticism for individuals immersed in a more medical model of healing.

Tara Haddon works as a Licensed Clinical Social Worker and Licensed Clinical Addiction Counselor who specializes in substance abuse and trauma and also administers sublingual ketamine therapy through her private practice, The Awaited Journey, LLC.

“I trust in people’s innate wisdom and their ability to heal themselves,” says Haddon.

Haddon’s approach might seem radical—woo woo, perhaps—to the skeptics of the bunch. She begins her sessions with

guided meditations, intention setting, and, occasionally, poem readings. Her office space is laden with Himalayan salt lamps and crystals, and she sits on the floor next to her patients—who may opt for a couch or mat—as they ascend into their ketamine trip. She is straightforward about who she is, and if a client does not resonate with her space or approach, she is happy to redirect them toward better-suited services.

Zach Dillon, a nurse practitioner who administers intravenous ketamine therapy at a private psychiatry office in Kansas, follows a more classical psychology approach. A couch rests against a massive window that consumes the north wall of Dillon’s office space, and it’s on this couch where his patients, hooked up to an IV, lay on their backs with a face mask, blanket, and headphones that stream an instrumental playlist curated specifically for their needs.

If you’re familiar with the theories surrounding psychedelics, you may have heard of the importance of set and setting. Set refers to one’s state of mind, whereas setting refers to the environment in which an individual trips. Prior to inserting an IV, Dillon ensures that he and his patients have set intentions and cultivated a safe space where they feel comfortable to explore the depths of their minds.

“It is important that individuals who take ketamine are with someone who understands the psychedelic experience and who can help them and guide them,” says Dillon.

Brigman Bell, a 23-year-old living in North Kansas City, connected with Dillon after a simple Google search: “Antidepressants left me feeling dissociated a lot of the time. I was having a mental breakdown in my car during work hours—the third one that week, and for no apparent reason. So I literally googled ‘I’m at my wit’s end,’ and it generated results for ketamine therapy.”

Bell completed the last of his six sessions of intravenous ketamine therapy a few months ago.

“I felt like I met God. My first time going under, I felt like I was hovering over the planet, but I also felt I was the planet. It was this sense of oneness. It made my problems feel small. I could remember instances of anxiety and depression, but I could no longer connect to my feelings of anxiety and depression.”

Bell’s father drove him home after his first session. Bell remembers that his dad laughed and told him, “You look high as hell.” Following Bell’s final session, his father arranged to try ketamine therapy himself.

Matt Soer, a paramedic and firefighter in KCMO who finished his fourth dose of intravenous ketamine therapy three months ago, echoed this psychospiritual sentiment as he described his first session as “an exceedingly spiritual out-of-body experience, inside my body.”

THINKING

THE BOX WITH KETAMINE By Grace Wilmot

“For the rest of the day [after my first session], I felt awesome,” Soer says. “You can ask my wife…I just had a grin on my face.”

Soer’s second session took a slightly darker route. He recalls reliving painful experiences from childhood and his twenty years as a career firefighter.

“Simultaneously, I felt protected, as if I was safe enough to explore these dark thoughts and they could not hurt me,” Soer says.

“Psychedelic medicine like psilocybin or ayahuasca can flood the nervous system, whereas ketamine does not. Neuroscientifically, ketamine is considered a sedative, analgesic, and dissociative, so at the right dosage, it can help individuals, particularly with trauma, tune into their thoughts and emotions without panic,” says Haddon.

This explains why ketamine, at lower levels, is employed to relieve individuals of chronic pain or lubricate individuals for talk therapy. It’s the higher levels–typically produced via IV or intramuscular injections–that induce the psychoactive effects.

Funk chose sublingual ketamine as she perceived the risks to be lesser. She admits that she also wanted to avoid nausea, which is more common with IV and intramuscular injection deliveries. Nonetheless, Kelly Funk’s recollection of her sublingual ketamine therapy session reads like a classic mystical trip.

“The closest thing I’ve ever done to it was a lightly hypnotized past life regression, during which I asked myself, ‘Am I making this up?’ I was in this hollow room filled with multi-colored snake toys. It became very apparent that I was the room and also journeying through this room, and all of a sudden, it would bend, and I would feel absolute terror. At some point, the room was closing in on me, and I remember wondering to myself, ‘Will this kill me?’ I was not panicked at this point, but I believed that it was a distinct possibility. So I went with it, and I felt this unbelievable freedom…just like…wow. I’ve had a lot of predatory men in my life, and what I emerged from this experience with was the realization that they cannot hurt me. For the next three weeks, I just felt…easy. Like so easy.”

She acknowledges that as time passes, she feels further from that sense of ease.

“My worry would be that for people who do not have the discipline or a sense of self-worth…like a drive to integrate the therapy into their lives…is that they might lose the therapeutic effects,” says Funk.

Her fear is legitimate. Ketamine is not a cure-all. To tune out requires a level of openness and loss of control, and to tune back in with sustained positive change requires effort and persistence.

Dillon provides 50 minutes of talk therapy following his patients’ 40-minute ketamine sessions as a start of an integra-

tion process. He also recommends booster therapies as necessary.

Phil Wolfson, who co-edited “The Ketamine Papers” and currently offers sublingual and intramuscular injections, in an article with The New York Times said, “Ketamine really makes no sense. It’s not attached to subjective experiences—themes don’t occur, or, if they do, they might not be particularly psychological in nature. I’m not reformed by neuroplasticity; I’m reformed by having had a break from the obsessions of my mind.”

He suggests that while ayahuasca or mushrooms produce visions that coalesce into narratives, ketamine gives a brief experience of the void.

“The essence of ketamine is for individuals to tune out to reconnect to the world in a way that they want,” Hadden says.

“I do not think I would have been as receptive to ketamine had I not been involved in talk therapy for a year and a half. And I do not think the EMDR following ketamine would have been as effective had I not tried ketamine,” says Soer. He would recommend ketamine therapy to others with a caveat: “Involve your therapist. Be intentional about the space in which you try ketamine therapy.”

The risk for individuals who dabble with psychedelic states is, as Wolfson puts it, “the loss of the monitor that overrides and guides us through the labyrinth of life, as best as it can.”

Individuals lose this monitor when they become too attached to drugs. In the ’80s, John C. Lilly, a doctor and psychoanalyst famous for sensory deprivation tanks, dabbling in human-dolphin communications, and advocating for ketamine, became addicted to ketamine. A researcher who crossed paths with him recalled Lilly spending most of his time in his Volkswagen minibus, injecting himself with ketamine multiple times a day.

The lesson? With privilege comes responsibility. As we approach psychedelic medicine a second time, it is essential to proceed with courage, humility, and respect for ourselves and the substances. Lilly’s narrative was not a great look for ketamine. It fused with the moral panic that emerged in the early ’70s (with an emphasis on LSD) and stunted promising research conducted on psychedelic medicine since the ’30s.

It seems that the U.S. functions as a pendulum, swinging from one extreme to another and never really settling at a middle ground. Maybe the middle ground is unattainable, or maybe it exists here and now in this space of possibilities and unknowns. The unknown is a space we resist. As we become disillusioned with elements of our current reality, it’s important that we don’t rush to define another.

Perhaps we all take a deep breath and allow reality to unfold around us.

THE GENTLE ART OF GODFREY RIDDLE’S GRIEF-PIT CLEANING

By Emma Hilboldt & Belle Yennie

Godfrey Riddle is not the kind of person to make you ugly cry. But that might change when Riddle reveals the vulnerable side— his basement—located underneath his bubbly, energetic personality.

Announced in 2022, The Gentle Art of Swedish Death Cleaning is Peacock’s latest home/life/spiritual improvement show, and much like its Netflix peer Queer Eye from the same production company—an entire season of the show is dedicated to sending these life coaches into KC and features the stories of local people who need help with an overwhelming mess.

Swedish Death Cleaning began as a bestselling book in 2017 by Margareta Magnusson. The tenets of its teachings boil down to decluttering items so loved ones won’t carry this responsibility when you’re gone. Additionally, it allows the participant to recognize the essentials in their life. While simple on the surface, their practical application into the lives of a person who

has formed emotional attachments to objects can mean pulling teeth emotionally.

Produced by Amy Poehler of Parks & Recreation, this show is moving. These coaches’ skill sets are to organize, design, and uplift Riddle. With those skills in hand, the hosts are transplanted to the City of Fountains to tackle our American need to grasp material items tightly.

Episode 5 of Season 1, entitled “What Lies Beneath,” opens with a mischievously grinning Godfrey Riddle before a haunting music sting hits, and the show suggests Riddle is hiding a terrible secret.

For those who haven’t had the pleasure of meeting the man, Riddle is someone we’ve profiled in The Pitch several times over the years for his charitable clothing brand, Civic Saint, and his nonprofit work at Rightfully Sewn. Civic Saint is “designed to uplift those advancing the Black Lives Matter, Equal Rights, and Voter Rights movements,” and Riddle can

be found wearing his designs during the show. He’s a renaissance man of kindness, but for whom the Powers That Be have never gotten the message, and the last few years have brought a flurry of Job-ian trials and tribulations that would have broken a lesser person. But not Riddle, who we can only assume awakes each day like the Energizer Bunny, with his single-minded dedication to—and love for—the people of Kansas City.

Within the episode, Swedish Death Cleaning’s hosts show up at his house to assist with the death cleaning process. What seems like a mere basement declutter is a heartache of a task. The hosts find out Riddle inherited items from both of his parents, who passed away unexpectedly, making his journey emotionally challenging.

However, the hosts provide other methods to celebrate Riddle’s parents and turn the basement into a space that evokes memories instead of sadness.

Riddle sat down with The Pitch to discuss how the show came into his life, how it has changed his life in the last year, and so much more.

together—the upper levels of my home, for the most part, are well decorated. I think they’re made for me, so who cares what anyone else thinks? But then the basement was my working subconscious, where all of that grief and trauma literally and metaphorically lived.

Now that you have created this new space, how do you live your life differently? It literally feels like I can breathe again. I feel lighter. That was what I felt in my body the minute the process was done. It just feels like I can actually stand up, put my shoulders back, and just be myself again. I don’t feel the weight of the literal physical space and having all of that work before me. And then, having all of that emotional work tethered to it, I finally had the time to process to the best of my ability and incorporate those emotions.

If you knew someone who wanted to start the process of Swedish Death Cleaning, what would be your advice to them? Start slow. I think it is the key to the process. It’s like the three S’s: Start small, sort, and go slowly.

Even in that limited timeframe, I felt like there was ample time for me to sort through every single item and create piles that I could then slowly move through and revisit to decide, do I really want to live without this? Or do I really want this to be in someone else’s life? Or do I just want to

So we set up a quick interview, and the gentleman very quickly checked out to be legit. Ultimately, he found me because I’d had a few articles published about Civic Saint.

I was like, “You know, this sounds like it’d be a good fit. I’ve got all this stuff in my basement for my parents, my grandfather, and my uncle, and I’ve just been sick and busy, and I just haven’t had the emotional or physical capacity to work through it.” So the long and short of it is four months later, we got approved, and we filmed in August 2022.

Did having people with an outside lens come to view your basement make it feel worse than you originally thought? So I will be honest, I knew it was bad. I didn’t think it was like a catastrophe. I thought, you know, this will take a few weekends of work. If I do it all by myself or my brother helps me, you know, it’s going to be hard work. But as they showed up and we started to go through, I thought, “I don’t know, maybe you could use this help more than you think you need it.”

We had this ongoing joke throughout the show that my house was kind of like me. So on the outside, I’m very well put

The true practical tip that they gave me is to start with trash because it’s easy to identify. We literally found an entire box from my mother of just newspaper for moving. And I’m like, “Wait, so you save a box full of basic trash?” And then there was a literal box of trash that we did throw away—just empty cans. I don’t know, someone clearly made a mistake in packing.

After going through this process, what does Swedish Death Cleaning mean to you? One word: purpose. And a phrase: to pursue purpose. And memory and legacy. I think that’s how I would sum up the whole process if I had to, like, brand it. Just the serendipity of things that can be gathered. Often, it makes me feel like even though my life journey has been a lot harder than I would have wanted it to be, and I would give anything to have my parents back, even just for a moment—it is what is supposed to be. I am where I’m supposed to be.

How has life been since the show’s premiere? The last year has been a whirlwind. It feels like something that happened eons ago, and since it has come out, it’s been a fun reminder. It’s also been surreal because I feel like I closed that chapter, and now I can look back on it more objectively. People have reached out and told me how it touched them, which just reminds me of

Photo by Brooke Tramel

why I said “yes” in the first place. People have also been reaching out to help with cancer work. I’m meeting with the Amer-

What is the best way for people to support your work at Civic Saint? Oh, God, well, you know, you can buy a shirt. Genuine-

ican Cancer Society soon, so being able to do things like that has been amazing.

How has your relationship with grief changed since this experience? It’s obviously an emotional experience, and it feels fully incorporated into my identity. Before, it felt like a burden, but now it just feels like a part of my body as opposed to something outside of me that I’m carrying. That made it more difficult, but now it’s easier to take it day by day.

Do you feel pressure to keep the space looking perfect? Yes, and it’s hard because a basement isn’t necessarily supposed to look great if you’re just using it for storage. Right after it was finished, I would give people a tour of it, but now it really is just my space. It’s lived in.

Do you find that your willingness to bring things into your home has changed? I love making my house feel like me. That’s my whole design philosophy; my home should reflect me. It hasn’t really changed the way I decorate, but when I do bring something into my home I think about how long I might have it or what purpose it serves. It has made getting rid of things a lot easier. I used to hold on to a lot of trinkets, but now it’s easier for me to purge them without feeling guilty.

ly, that is a really great way to support because proceeds are donated back into the community through my nonprofit partners. Not only does it help me pay for cancer bills and all of those fun expenses from that time in my life, it, most importantly, powers that good work. So that’s a really easy way for people to support us, and an even easier way is to just follow us, like us, and tell someone who you think would care about us about our mission.

You’re doing a lot of other things in the community, what do you have going on right now that people should know about? Right now, with ArtsKC, I’m launching a creative leaders program. It’s focused on rising stars in the arts, corporate and community sector, and anti racist adaptive arts leadership. We train them over the course of six weeks and then appoint them to the boards of nonprofits and commissions around the region. We are all from groups and backgrounds that are typically underrepresented on boards of directors, especially with the arts. They’re trying to rebuild after COVID, and they need younger, more diverse audiences.

The first season of The Gentle Art of Swedish Death Cleaning is now available to stream on Peacock. Riddle is the focus of Episode 5, “What Lies Beneath.” To stay up to date with Riddle on his ongoing work in KC, follow him on Insta and Facebook.

It just feels like I can actually stand up, put my shoulders back, and just be myself again. I don’t feel the weight of the literal physical space and having all of that work before me.

Courtesy Peacock

MEGHANN HENRY’S TOOL FOR LEADING WHAT IF PUPPETS

By Sophia Joelle-Oswald

What If Puppets just a few years ago. What started as a team of three has grown to 11 members led by Henry.

These days the group leans heavily into knocking down barriers. No longer male-dominated, they’re creating characters who depict a range of people facing unique challenges and come from all walks of life. An effort has been made to hire women and non-binary folks—so there’s diverse representation in everything What If Puppets does.

We sat down with Henry to discuss what it’s like to be a woman in puppetry and the impact What If Puppets has on the community.

Tell us about yourself and how you got into puppetry. I have a BFA in theatre from Emporia State University. After that, I was like, “What am I gonna do with my life?” I did a lot of thinking about what I love about theatre and when it is the most meaningful. I decided it was working with young people. What you can create for kids can be so otherworldly and magical, and that is such a fun, creative challenge. How do you do that really well? How do you get smart and specific with what you’re doing? I also had no idea how to enter the field, so I got my MFA from the University of Central Florida in theater for young audiences.

Then I came to Kansas City to do my residency, and I worked with the Coterie Theatre for five years when I decided I wanted to work in the community more deeply. I started working for public libraries as a youth services librarian, thinking about how I could take my knowledge of building programs for kids and my desire to connect more authentically with the

Denver—the library and work took me to Denver. While I was in Denver, I got back into doing different stuff with art centers and eventually started working with a woman who was trying to revamp a nonprofit that had fallen by the wayside. She asked me to be on their board, and their mission was to use theatre as a tool for social-emotional learning.

I spent a few years on the board helping them to figure out what the programming should look like and how they could fundraise for it, and then eventually, I was on staff and helped them build out their programs. I did that with an organization called Mirror Image Arts for about five years, and then I was like, “I think I have to leave Denver.” It was just at that time that Alex Espy, who’s the education director at Messner Puppet Theater (now, What If Puppets), reached out to me. We’d been connected from our days as artists in Kansas City when we were younger and were like, “Hey, we’re looking for a new executive artistic director. Is that something you would be interested in?” I was like, “Maybe, I would be.”

I wouldn’t call myself a puppeteer in the way I would call Mike, our director of puppetry, a puppeteer. But I was an artist and director who had experience with puppets—combine that with my theater for young audiences, directing background, and SEL arts education work, it became a wonderful place for me to be.

Puppetry seems to be a very male-dominated field. Has that been your experience? What’s it like being a woman in this industry? Yeah, I think it is a male-dominated field from a commercial puppetry stand-

think puppetry as a folk form has had a lot of women involved—especially when you think about teachers, librarianship, and ministry puppetry—in those forms, I think women have had a lot of places at the table. It’s the professionalization of it, where there have been gaps at times—which is not uncommon in the arts in general. I think we’re making a lot of great strides. As far as being a woman in the puppetry field, I think it’s interesting because it’s looking at the stories we’ve been telling them and how we have been telling them. When we look at the way many folktales are written, we look at the way many puppetry pieces in the past have been—even our own company—through a male lens. What we’re doing now is talking about how we want this to be represented. Is that a story we should even be telling anymore? And I think right now, particularly, it’s about asking a lot of questions, and it’s not that we throw everything out. It’s how do we get critical about the things that we’re doing and ask ourselves questions so that we can make sure we’re centering a diversity of voices, a diversity of perspectives. For me, it’s been a really joyful, open process.

Paul Messner is internationally recognized and established. What’s it like being a woman walking into a man’s legacy? And then leaving this legacy behind and kind of starting your own? It goes back to the thing I was saying before: Looking at the canon of things that we’ve done, and how much of that was through a male lens and saying—what does that look like now? Our main puppeteer is still male. So how are we building that out? The first step we is to identify a female puppeteer. We’ve start-

part-time—we’re working to raise funds to bring her on full-time. So now we’ll have a male and a female touring artist, which will be awesome, and she’ll develop her own shows.

That is what I’m very excited about right now—how do we even out those scales? How do you acknowledge and honor the gift we got from Paul—in the fact that he helped to make puppetry beloved in the community—but now, how do we make it more inclusive of what our community is and what it looks like? That’s gonna be a long journey. We’ve got to do the hard work of cultivating the interest and providing the skills. From that standpoint, I think about it a lot as it’s my job to stand firm in the fact that we’ve got women artists in the community who just need opportunities, and how do we create those opportunities for people? I think previously in the world, it was sort of like, “Oh, I know this person, and now this person is going to come.” So part of what we’re doing is trying to formalize that, right? Rather than it’s just like, oh, Paul knew this guy, and this guy knew this guy. How are we opening the door and putting a call out for artists? How are we intentionally providing pipeline processes so that we can have more equitable ways to access something for someone?

It’s my job to stand firm in the fact that we’ve got women artists in the community who just need opportunities, and how do we create those opportunities for people?

There’s been a real effort made to hire women and non-binary individuals. Has it been challenging to keep this in mind when pitching and hiring contractors, actors, and other staff? So much about the arts is cre-

ating an environment that’s welcoming to everybody. That’s why most of us get into it, right? In high school or middle school, often, the theater or the arts become a place where you feel the most accepted, and that has not always translated into professional work. Suddenly, it’s like this really inclusive environment drops off to a more competitive, maybe not as supportive sort of thing. For me, as a leader, one of the things I think about is why we are all doing this. We’re doing it because, at some point, it created a sense of community. And community means inclusion, right? Everyone’s welcome at the table. So, I’m always thinking about how we are making our organization a place where everybody’s welcome at the table. A lot of it starts with each of us individually and thinking about, “How am I showing up? And how am I treating the people that I’m working with? And what would I need and want if I were in this situation? And what do I not know that I should be asking about?”

Organizationally, I think because we work with young people, it also puts a finer point that we are not young people. Those young people have to be the experts in their own lives, and they have to teach us things about what it is to be a young person today. I think that infiltrates the whole thing, right? I’ve never been a 5-year-old in 2023 after a pandemic, so I’ve got to listen to those kids and understand what that’s like. I’ve never been a teaching artist who’s worked with kids or a puppeteer that’s worked with kids in this scenario, so it becomes this sort of thing when you know that you don’t know, then you look toward people and are open to being wrong and having them tell you you’re wrong.

The type of childhood programming you create has become more diverse over the years. For example, there is one puppet that is a young nonverbal neurodivergent girl. Why do you feel it’s important to have this representation? Every kid deserves to

be seen, right? We know that when we see someone on TV or in movies, or in a play who looks, sounds, acts, and behaves as we do, we feel validated whether we consciously know it or not. When we made the digital series, we talked a lot about how we could use it to represent different educational needs—different backgrounds of kids—so this idea of having a character who maybe was not verbal but could still communicate with people through her own ways and means were things that our education director had directly experienced with his work inside of preschool. We took the real things he had experienced and applied them to this puppet, and I think puppetry is so beautiful for that because puppets show so much without speaking. With a tilt of their head or reach of their arm, our brains fill in a lot of information. It makes it this extra heightened engagement.

When we’re looking at our materials, we’re always trying to think about how we are picking books that we’re getting feedback from our community about—what books they want to see us bring in to use inside of our creative drama sessions. We’re thinking about what stories we are not telling. What stories have we told too much? The more diverse our organization becomes over the long arm of time, the more exciting and more authentic those things will become. We’ve got more people, organizationally, who are going to come with their own thoughts and ideas— even just in the hiring—we have neurodivergent staff, we have a person of color on our staff, we have a person who has a hearing problem, so we have people who have different perspectives. It’s exciting to see those little changes happen, and then it’s like, what will happen next? How much deeper can it get? How much more inclusive? It’s just the beginning.

Article originally published by Catcall Magazine. Check out more work from Catcall Magazine at catcallmag.com

Meghann Henry in the old What If Puppets workshop, before moving into Plexpod Westport and a What If Puppets performance, created and filmed during the COVID pandemic. All photos by Travis Young

Farm to Fable

NOKA DELIVERS ON SINCERITY, BUT IS IT WORTH THE PRICE?

By Lauren Textor

Noka has seemingly everything going for it.

The Japanese farmhouse-style restaurant is the brainchild of Chef Amante Domingo, who also owns The Russell. The eatery’s name (which means “farmer” in Japanese) and concept pay homage to Domingo’s deceased father. The shelves on the west wall are even made from the wood

of the 150-year-old barn which stood on his father’s farm. The elegant, understated decor is emphasized by communal tables that seat 20 people each.

The menu is composed of creative and photogenic small plates, several of which feature fresh seafood. The staff is so attentive that they’re almost intuitive, clearing

empty dishes and refilling drinks as soon as there is a need.

That being said, Noka has some quirks.

Booking a reservation requires a $5 deposit per person in case of cancellation, which prompts me to ask, Do they know we’re in Kansas City? No-shows hurt a restaurant’s profits and can be especially detrimental for a business that’s just starting out. Regardless, I was taken aback and even a little put off by seeing this in the heart of the Midwest for the first time.

On the Tuesday evening when I visited, Noka was serene, sprinkled with only a few other diners. We sat at the corner of one of the communal tables and ordered our drinks: the Citrus and Umami mocktail ($11) with zero-proof gin, ginger hibiscus, lemon, and ginger beer, and a glass of the Breaking Bread ($13), recommended by our server and described as “carbonic Zinfandel/Caringnan/Alicante.” The Citrus and Umami is pleasantly crisp and fruity, while the red wine is acidic and earthy.

The Hamachi Sashimi ($21) is sprinkled with roe, topped with jalapeños and slices of red onion, and laid on a bed of popcorn. There’s a playful contrast between textures here, with the delicate, buttery fish and the crunchy, toasted popcorn. However, the seasoning does not permeate the fish.

The Octopus Tostada ($19), next to the

NOKA

334 E 31st St., Kansas City, MO 64108

(816) 766-4441, noka. restaurant

Tuesday-Thursday 4-10 p.m.

Friday 4-11 p.m.

Saturday 5-11 p.m.

Crispy Beef Tongue ($16), was the menu item that intrigued me the most. The chef himself presented the dish to us and explained that the restaurant had just rolled it out the week before. He said that they’re still tweaking it, but there’s no tweaking necessary. Succulent baby octopi, juicy tentacles, melted cheese on a tostada, and a smear of jalapeño vinaigrette—what’s not to like?

We closed out dinner with dessert: the Cream and Corn ($15), a bowl of High Hopes ricecream with sassafras, and a popcorn garnish. It tastes like vanilla ice cream. Very excellent, smooth, and creamy vanilla ice cream, but vanilla ice cream nonetheless. My middle-class roots balked at the price, then at the lack of pizzazz.

Noka has potential. More importantly, it has heart. There’s plenty of room for its team to grow into the restaurant’s promise, but it’ll take more than fresh ingredients and stylish decor to justify the prices.

THE GIFT OF Q39

For the special people in your life — our signature rubs, sauces and apparel.

Chocolate Cream Pie at Ladybird Diner

BY SARAH SIPPLE

Ladybird Diner

721 Massachusetts Street

Lawrence, KS 66044

There’s nothing like popping into a time less diner to cool off and pause than with a cold mason jar of iced tea and a slice of chilled pie.

Ladybird Diner on buzzy Mass. Street in downtown Lawrence has been serving comfort food and fresh pie since 2014, but their impact goes far beyond one tasty meal.

In 2020, when folks, as well as restaurants, were struggling with pandemic-related shutdowns and pivots, Ladybird Diner provided thousands of free meals and grocery boxes to anyone in need. The program persisted for well over a year, bolstered by proceeds from their book of essays, Ladybird, Collected. Since then, they have hosted fundraising events for The Willow Domestic Violence Center and Vote No Kansas in support of reproductive rights, provided free soup and hot coffee on snow days, and much more in service to their community.

But back to the pie. Coconut Cream Pie is a classic, and no one does it better than Ladybird. However, the Chocolate Cream Pie stands out above all other chocolate pies. First, the chocolate filling is darker than any other. The flavor is more like creamy chocolate cake batter– or even a ganache—than a light chocolate mousse that is common in this pie genre. It is so rich that you may want to share, but that’s a great reason to just order a second slice. Coconut Cream brings a lighter taste, with true nutty flavors and a crust that keeps it all intact but remains flaky and secondary to the filling.

Ladybird Diner is open for breakfast and lunch on Mass. Street in downtown Lawrence Wednesday through Sunday 8 a.m. - 3 p.m.

Krispy Girl at Servaes Brewing Company

BY SARAH SIPPLE

Servaes Brewing Company

10921 Johnson Drive

Shawnee, KS 66203

At Servaes Brewing Company, fluidity is the name of the game. There are no flagship beers at this family-owned brewery in downtown Shawnee. Experimentation and reinvention are paramount to the Servaes team. Flowing from the rainbow taps are a variety of New England India Pale

Ales, plus novelty, barrel-aged, and innovative sour beers.

An atmosphere of creativity has fostered some unique brews, like “In Pizza We Crust: Half Baked Ale,” using cooked pizza crusts from Old Shawnee Pizza for extra maltiness. The coconut variety of “Aztec Alchemist” is a heavy, decadent, and strong stout with flavors as complex yet natural as its ingredient list. It has a fragrance you’ll want to bottle up and savor forever. These brews and many more are available in their recently expanded tap room. There is ample parking, a casual atmosphere, and special treats like popcorn and house-made sodas.

Krispy Girl is a Czech Pale Lager with 5% ABV. It is brewed with three malts and a special blend of hops for a crystal-clear pale yellow pour with tropical notes of tangerine, citrus, and pineapple. Krispy Girl is refreshing and versatile. Black and purple packaging adorns the large take-home cans. Grab a four-pack, then join friends for a patio dinner where this would pair fabulously with a summery chicken salad.

Krispy Girl and other fun brews are found only on-site in Shawnee. This particular beer goes for $7 per pour and $20 for a four-pack of 16 oz. cans.

Sarah

Sipple

MISE EN PLACE

LITTLE BUTTER’S KELSEY EARL VOWS TO MAKE CAKE SILLY AGAIN

By Kate Frick

Kelsey Earl doesn’t dream at night, but you wouldn’t know that by looking through Little Butter’s Instagram. It’s a kaleidoscope of color, texture, mirrored disco balls, locally foraged flowers, candied citrus—and cake. Beginning with pastry boxes and pop-ups, Earl now has an arsenal of flavors that beguile Midwestern bake sales.

The Pitch: Are you a horoscope person? Kelsey Earl: Sometimes, yeah. Sometimes I’m not. I am an Aries.

Does your Aries energy enjoy sustaining Little Butter? Yes. Right now, I’m just doing a lot. This week I’ve got my [multiple] jobs and eight custom cakes.

I started with a box of custom pastries and quickly pivoted to a pop-up model. Coming up with new menus constantly out of my home kitchen was exhausting, and it stopped being fun. I’d cry all morning before my pop-up, and then get there and be like, “Well, thank God it’s over.”

So I asked, “How can I bake for people but make it more sustainable?” I switched to mostly cakes, and that’s been going really well. Customers say things like, “These cakes look great, but when are you doing another box?” I’m like, “I’m not.”

Scarcity is sometimes the best thing you can offer a customer. That’s why my boxes were so hot! At first, I had 10 boxes, then 20. That’s all I could do.

When did you get your start in the industry? I have always been a people person. I bussed and waited tables. Basically, I’ve been a server, hostess, and bartender forever, and I baked on the side for fun. I didn’t want to give up waitressing at a restaurant to be a cook. It’s a drastically different lifestyle, and the way that you’re compensated is so different, which is wrong.

Your flavor profiles are always pushing the envelope. Do you dream in pastry?

No, Firstly, I don’t really dream. I pull out my flavor bible and take inspiration from other things I’ve eaten. I’ll go up to Baba’s Pantry and see what ingredients they have, or the farmers’ market, or native plants from Prairie Birthday Farm. Seasonal ingredients are important to me, which gets really tricky here, especially in winter, and that

Mise En Place is a series of questions, answers, recommendations, and culinary wisdom from the food and drink masters that push KC flavor further. The following answers have been edited for length and clarity.

challenges me more. Some things just come with time—like coriander really brings out blueberries and citrus. When I’m building a cake, I approach it like a dish.

Do you feel like the name Little Butter is ironic? A little. When I was thinking about starting this bakery, I started selling my pastry boxes on my own Instagram. I quickly realized, “I need to get something else out here.” I knew that I wanted my logo to be a little stick of butter as a person. I love it. People call me Butter now, and they call my fiancé Mr. Butter.

Are there any fridge or pantry items you can’t live without? I always need a fancy vinegar from Acid League. They’ve got a blueberry port and a Meyer lemon honey. I use them in baking and cooking. I’ll put them in my water, my salad dressing, my buttercream, and my jam.

Are you gonna bake your own wedding cake? We are getting married this fall. Just this week, I was like, “I’m not going to bake my own cake.” I don’t want to stress. So, I am going to be making a cake—made of only butter. A little 4-inch cake with Victorian piped butter on it. And then I’ll make a big focaccia, served with radishes and my little butter cake.

Did you notice your electric bill spike with Little Butter? Before I started Little Butter, at the very beginning of the pandemic, I started this thing called Focaccia for Produce. I would bake three days a week, and I was having the oven at like 450 degrees for hours every single day. By August, it was like 100 degrees, my oven was still at 450, and I was baking in my panties with four fans in the kitchen, asking, “What have I done?”

Littlle Butter founder Kelsey Earl behind-the-scenes of her cake and pastry production. Zach Bauman

BOUND for GLORY

HOW MIDNIGHT MARKET’S QUEER BDSM EXCHANGE BUILT LFK’S SAFEST SPACE

By Nick Spacek

Lawrence’s Midnight Market is many things.

It’s a series of Kink Nite events at the Bottleneck. It’s a monthly Poetry Munch at the Replay Lounge. It’s an upcoming Trash Bash fashion show at Maceli’s. At these events, you will see many, many people dressed in black. It gets kinky, no doubt, with a lot of fetish wear that is see-through, cut-out, and skintight. Heavy eyeliner makes a regular appearance. For the Kink Nite events, there is a half-page-long list of rules which must be read and agreed to before entry.

A Midnight Market event is the place where, if you want to be a different version of yourself for a night—be it producing art, dressing up, or just showing up and taking in the performances on stage—it offers an environment for you to do so where people will be open and accepting.

At April’s Kink Nite: Metal Edition, an attendee named Lambyyy summed it up perfectly when they said, “I think the main thing I love the most is the acceptance of different art that is not for the public eye. That’s why I keep coming back—because it gives something fresh.”

The artwork found at Midnight Market vendors’ booths encompasses a wide range of expression. There are DIY zines and chapbooks, custom-made leather collars, Manga and anime-inspired imagery, and erotic baked goods that leave you wondering where exactly one finds a cookie cutter shaped like a rabbit vibrator.

At these events, you’ll find fully realized projects like John Brant’s Faded Sons zines, even though calling these perfect bound, beautifully printed collections of “erotic, emotional, and fun images of the male figure” zines is underselling them at 200 glossy pages.

“I think my work is a little more erotic and hardcore for the average person, so it’s kind of a good fit,” says Brant of his appearance at the Midnight Market. “I mean, it has its place online, but I’ve never done anything in person before.”

A project that’s been going on for years, making its first appearance in public be-

cause Midnight Market made it possible— that’s kind of the whole vibe. It’s a well-organized, open, and inclusive event that allows people to be themselves and really take flight. Midnight Market feels like something that has been around forever, but such is not the case, as co-founder Davi Nicoll explained when I met with them and fellow co-founder, Matthew Silovsky, at Silovsky’s RV home one gorgeous Thursday afternoon in April.

“We started planning it in September, and the first one was in December,” says Nicoll of the inaugural Kink Nite. “It happened fast.”

As Silovsky’s cats, BlackCat and Houdini, wander about looking for pets, they explain how the pair came to be friends while working at former Lawrence restaurant Lark a Fare and hosting the occasional pridethemed art show at the restaurant. They seem astonished when we discuss how this fully-formed vision came to be in just three months.

“It snowballed so fast,” Silovsky says. “It literally just happened. We had no issue finding kink, adult-themed, and not-safefor-work stuff that you wouldn’t see at your standard galleries. That’s what Davi and I do, and that’s what all our friends do.”

Attending that first December event, I showed up around 11:15 p.m., a solid 45 minutes after the doors opened, and the line stretched from the front door of the Bottleneck all the way to the corner of 8th and New Hampshire. It was easily 50 people long, and by the time those of us waiting read the rules, paid our cover, and entered—it was absolutely packed.

“We didn’t know it was gonna be such a big deal until halfway through the event, and we were like, ‘Oh my God,’” says Nicoll.

Part of the appeal of the whole Midnight Market concept is a combination of two things, says the pair. For service industry people working in bars and restaurants until late, having to be at a traditional art market with a 6 or 7 a.m. setup time is just a no-go. Also, as Nicoll points out, their art was “a little too sexy for it.”

“It snowballed from that idea to: ‘Well, artists are generally up really late creating art, so why don’t we just have an art market late at night?’” Silovsky says.

“Have you seen Parks and Rec where they have the farmer’s market after dark?” Nicoll asks. “Same vibe.”

Parks and Recreation is a really good comparison, actually—kinky aspects notwithstanding. Talking with attendees at the Kink Nite: Metal Edition, the thing that kept coming up was the idea that, for all of the sexy or naughty aspects of the whole thing, it was one of the more wholesome experiences I’ve ever had. Running into people I knew well or with whom I was simply acquaintances, I got more hugs than I have at some shows. Everybody was really positive and encouraging in a way that resulted in a Leslie-Knope-in-nipple-tape vibe.

“That’s why Davi’s so strict on making sure we’re vetting people through the front door, and they have to read [the rules] before they get in,” says Silovsky. “It’s hard to find a super safe space, especially with a bunch of alternative people. And now, more recently, for queer folks and that kind of situation, we really want to party with the right people.”

The rules were developed while Nicoll was working at DV8 Distillery in Boulder, Colorado, which is a micro-distillery and gay bar that also hosts kink events.

“I was working them, and the more I

Upcoming Midnight Market Events

Trash Bash | A Fashion Show Maceli’s Banquet Hall & Catering, Friday, June 2

Replay’s Coyotes: A Tribute Show Replay Lounge, Wednesday, July 12

Kink Nite House Rules

Ask questions if anything is unclear.

• Respect a space or area that is off-limits.

• Follow the dress code.

• Nipples, genitals, holes covered at all times!

• No kink shaming, keep comments to yourself. This is a LITE dungeon experience only!

• Safe Word: PURPLE. NO SEX of ANY KIND.

• Don’t touch ANYONE without permission. EVER!

Violating consent goes beyond stations with a play partner.

• Never presume everyone here at the event wants to play.

• Never touch anyone’s belongings. Avoid fixating on a single person or group.

• Don’t take photos or videos of scenes or partygoers.

• GET CONSENT or ELSE.

worked, I was like, ‘Damn, these are wholesome,’” Nicoll says. “Because nobody got too drunk. Everybody was super polite. Everyone was there to have a good time. Nobody was judgmental, and people were wearing next to nothing. I met some really great people. I met a drag queen who makes her own leather work ‘cause she has her own tannery, and she called me one of God’s strongest warriors.”

Nicoll developed the rules partially because when they worked those events—as a standard practice at all parties—even the bartenders had to read the rules and agree to them before they came on shift. Nicoll contacted the owners at DV8, got a list, and combined those with Silovsky’s own research on dungeon etiquette, as well as their personal experience with “going to sexy things.”

“What I really want for this is to also cultivate—I don’t like going to a bar where you have to feel like you’re performing in order to have someone like you,” Silovsky says. “We all go to the bar to escape everyday judgmental things, and then you go to a bar, and all of a sudden, it turns into a mean girl thing—just adult level.”

“It’s kind of why I dress slutty,” Nicoll says. “So people know that they can—I’ve got electrical tape on.”

It’s all about setting a positive example from the top down, and part of that is more than just wanting this to be a fun, sexy, kinky event. While that’s definitely the appeal, Nicoll and Silovsky want to provide safe sexual education for Kansas. While everyone at a Midnight Market event is over 21, thanks to cuts in education and social mores, there are some whole-ass adults walking around very misinformed about sex and how things should operate.

“I went to public school in Kansas, and I remember having sex ed, and it was garbage,” Nicoll says. “ I remember learning nothing about sex and nothing about queer sex. Nothing about safe sex. Getting shaving cream—like I needed that at 16. Like I needed the pressure to remove my body hair. Thank you, weirdos. Thank you. And they also told me that I needed to be thin and attractive so the opposite sex would be

attracted to me. I think back on that, and I’m like, ‘So many other people must have had horrible experiences with sex ed in Kansas.’”

“See, I went to Catholic school, and oh God, no,” says Silovsky. “I didn’t know anything ‘til like fifth or sixth grade. Sex education is—I mean, you have Grindr, you have Tumblr—it’s such a hookup culture. For gays, we have the prep pill to keep us away from HIV, but that’s the only thing it keeps you away from. You get on Grindr, and no one’s using condoms.”

Just being exposed to something outside the straight, cis-gendered norms can be an education in and of itself. There have definitely been folks at various Midnight Market events who were “normie as fuck,” as Nicoll puts it. Fleece zip-up vest, backwards ball cap, and khakis—but walking around with the biggest, happiest grin on his face.

“He was just like, ‘This is cool,” Nicoll says. “He wasn’t being a horn dog. He wasn’t being gross. He was doing the thing that one of my friends calls ‘looking respectfully.’”

From the slightly intimate confines of the Bottleneck, Midnight Market has stretched out to begin sponsoring events at the Replay Lounge, including a monthly Tuesday night Poetry Munch, which is more of a chill hangout than the dungeon lite aspect of the Kink Nites.

Still, the nature of being on the corner of 10th and Massachusetts Streets can make for some interesting interactions. Silovsky relates a tale of what happened at the Poetry Munch prior to our chat. As the weather was really nice, they had the door to the sidewalk open, and a group of four young, blonde college women were walking past.

“All of the sudden, one of our storytellers kept saying the word ‘clit,’” Silovsky says. “I looked over outside to peek, just ‘cause that word kept getting repeated, and I was like, ‘Oh!’ It was so good. I can still see their faces.”

Outside, their jaws dropped as they pointed at each other like, “Can you hear her?”

“I was like, ‘It’s kinky poetry,’” Nicoll says. “Then they started talking about their assholes a lot, and that was really funny. God. I cried.”

As Silovsky puts it, you have to appreciate that sense of vulnerability to literally let the public—and random passers-by on the sidewalk—hear your heart coming through the microphone. Part of what makes that possible is that Nicoll and Silovsky are building a place where people are empowered to say “no” as much as they are to say “yes.”

“‘No’ is one of the most powerful words to use, and a lot of people don’t feel like they’re powerful enough to say it,” Silovsky says. “Maybe it’s because they don’t have the education to back themselves up.”

One of the things that gets lost in discussion is that it’s not just making sure you get consent, but it’s also the ability and the understanding to—if someone gives you a “no”—accept that answer. Enthusiastic consent is sexy as hell, but the flip side of that is somebody who respects your boundaries and is willing to not, when you say “no,” is also sexy as hell—if not even sexier.

“It’s really important, and I think a lot of people don’t have a community to practice consent in outside of a sexual concept,” Nicoll says. “That’s why we’re not doing sex parties—at least not yet. That’s why we’re having conversations.”

After the Trash Bash at Maceli’s on Friday, June 2, the next big thing from Midnight Market is “Replay’s Coyotes: A Tribute Show,” dedicated to the ‘00s cult classic, Coyote Ugly, taking place at the Replay Lounge.

“That will have 11 drag performers, a few artists, and a spanking booth,” Silovsky says. “We’ll still have normal stuff, but it’ll just be a downsize, perfect for a streamlined process.”

The Replay Lounge is more walk-in heavy, so Silovsky sees “Replay’s Coyotes” as a true test of how well they can modify to be a semi-private event and begin vetting to other bars as a possible test run, should they ever take Midnight Market on the road.

“Every venue has its own unique thing about it,” Nicoll says. “Clientele, vibe, structure, layout, flow of traffic. There are all sorts of things to account for, and that’s gonna tailor every event to be specific to that venue and the crowd. You gotta know your audience, as well.”

“Are you okay if we kick out or deny people?” Silovsky says.

“Are you gonna be okay with how strict we’re gonna be?” Nicoll says. “Are you gonna be okay with the kind of things that we wanna do? Are you gonna be excited about it like we are? Because it will bring you money.”

Silovsky says they see the Midnight Market as a means of chipping away at the negative stigma on BDSM because, as they admit, it’s an abrasive sexual subculture where you’re getting beat.

“We’re kind of like metal people,” Silovsky says. “We’re big, loving, softy, softy teddy bears that just want to cuddle after you beat us.”

“Some people just like a full spectrum of human emotion, you know?” says Nicoll.

Just an average day at The Pitch office with Midnight Market co-founders Davi Nicoll and Matthew Silovsky. Brooke Tramel

an and bisexual artists like Ma Rainey. Tiny Davis, whose musical talent on the trumpet rivaled Louis Armstrong, was run out of town because she was a lesbian.

Between the 1970s and 2000s, queer women had fewer choices than cis gay men, but at least they still had places to go. Billie Jean’s, Sappho’s, and Soakie’s were hoppin’ back in the day. Tootsie’s moved three times before it closed in 2010. Wetherbee’s was a lesbian pool hall north of the river that hung on until 2011.

The fault doesn’t lie entirely with the proprietors of the businesses. I saw a TikTok last year pointing out that there are only 27 lesbian bars left in the entire U.S., compared to the roughly 200 establishments in the 1980s. Why are they going extinct?

One of the greatest impacts is that singles no longer rely on bars to meet like-minded people. Digital dating has shifted our behavior. A Stanford study found in 2016 that 65% of queer couples met online. Only 9% of women say they met their current partner at a bar.

There has also been a general decline in bars in the U.S., with the pandemic having a share of the blame. Bars centered around gay men are closing as well, but not at the rate of lesbian establishments. The Lesbian Bar Project suggested that gay bars have staying power because men have more disposable income in our society, especially when they are childless.

The pay disparity is such that queer women and people assigned female at birth (AFAB) earn 79 cents on the dollar compared to the average cis man in the U.S., according to an April 2023 report from the Bureau of Labor Statistics. Add any form of intersecting marginalized identity on top of that (e.g. Black and bisexual or Latinx and lesbian), and the disparity widens.

Another perspective is that seeing queer bars close over the last two decades isn’t entirely bad. It’s partly due to some queer people feeling like they no longer need the security and anonymity of exclusively LGBTQIA+ spaces. “Safe” is arbitrary, and this may only apply to people in larger towns and cities.

In 2001, Pitch reporter Deborah Hipp

wrote this about Tootsies: “Lesbians risk being killed, losing their jobs, and losing custody of their children simply for being gay. Bars like Tootsie’s have always served as a refuge from social discrimination.”

Making the argument that queer people are, in general, safer now than in 2001 when Hipp penned that sentiment is short-sighted. With Kansas and Missouri vying for a spot at the top of the list of “Worst States To Live If You Are LGBTQ+,” more safe spaces are indeed needed.

Some people might ask: Isn’t queer-friendly good enough? As in, can’t all queers just hang out like one big happy family at a gay bar?

Let’s first consider what makes a bar a lesbian bar. The Lesbian Bar Project says: “What makes a bar uniquely lesbian is its prioritization of creating space for people of marginalized genders, including women (regardless if they are cis or trans), non-binary folks, and trans men. As these spaces aim to be inclusive of all individuals across the diverse LGBTQIA+ community, the label ‘lesbian’ belongs to all people who feel that it empowers them.”

The Lesbian Bar Project seeks to support the lesbian bars remaining and to revive the industry through awareness and conversation.

Gwen Shockey of TLBP says, “When one doesn’t have a sense of history or belonging in our society, it can feel incredibly dislocating.”

Community and camaraderie are crucial to marginalized communities. Widespread acceptance of queer folks in our culture doesn’t mean they don’t need gathering places of their own.

If you want to know more about the city’s LGBTQIA+ history, download the new app for the Kansas City Rainbow Tour. This audio-led driving tour launches June 3, and lesbian bars of the past will be featured, as their memory and legacy are the only way to interact with them now.

You can find Kristen @OpenTheDoorsKC on Twitter or openthedoorscoaching com. Check out her podcast Keep Them Coming.

Photo by Nicole Bissey. Illustrations by Shelby Phelps

Solve for Stuck

By Britt Frank

MYTH BUSTERS: MENTAL HEALTH EDITION

In a world where mental health information is sourced from TikTok, Instagram, and Twitter, it can be helpful to pause and sort fact from fiction (though to be fair, social media often provides more accurate information than many licensed professionals). In honor of Mental Health Awareness, here are my top five mental health myths—and what you can do about them.

Myth 1: Trauma is only when something really bad happens to you

Many people hear the word “trauma” and assume that means someone was in a war, assaulted, or survived a natural disaster. Since it is a commonly believed myth that trauma = something really bad happened, many people walk around with traumatic injuries not knowing that those injuries

“count” as trauma. Trauma is not defined by external events (though we can all agree that some events are inherently traumatic). Trauma is an internal process. Trauma is what happens when—for whatever reason—your brain cannot metabolize an experience. You can think of trauma as the digestion process. While some foods are almost guaranteed to make you sick, indigestion is part of life and happens occasionally to everyone. Not everyone experiences the same amount of trauma, and not everyone is walking around “traumatized,” but everyone—including you—will experience “brain indigestion” to some degree at some point.

What you can do: Validate your experience. Our brains sometimes undergo trauma from events that we don’t think of as traumatic, and our brains can sometimes walk away unscathed from events that we definitely think of as traumatic. Don’t argue with yourself. In a fight between your best logic and your brain’s interpretation of events, your brain will win every time.

Myth 2: Time heals all wounds

Time is a construct invented to help humans cope with the overwhelming bigness of existence. Some physicists argue that time is not even real. Wherever you land on the “what is time” spectrum, it is important to know that time does not magically heal all wounds. With enough time and distance from a painful event, you may be able to dodge your feelings more artfully, but unfelt feelings tend to show up sideways as problematic relationships with people, chemicals, or behaviors.

What you can do: Once again, validate your experience. Then, remind yourself that time is not a magic elixir for pain. The healing process (by whatever definition you choose) is what heals pain, not the passage of time.

Myth 3: Anxiety is a disease

Anxiety is awful, uncomfortable, terrifying— and necessary. Anxiety is the check-engine light of the mind’s dashboard. Anxiety is the smoke alarm of the internal system. If you

didn’t have things like check-engine lights and smoke detectors, you’d never know if you were in danger. We often get so caught up in the discomfort of anxiety that we forget that anxiety is a messenger—not a disorder.

As Thomas Szasz put it, “Insanity is the only sane reaction to an insane society.” Once we know how to decode its messages, anxiety points toward untended injuries from the past, destructive relationships, or circumstances in the present and helps us to avoid unwanted things in the future.

What you can do: Validate, validate, validate. Stay away from thoughts like, “What’s wrong with me,” “I’m overreacting,” and, “It’s stupid to feel this way.” Remind yourself that your brain is on your side, and your feelings of anxiety are a sign that your brain feels scared. Don’t ask, “Why is my brain scared?” Ask, “What are three people, places, or things that can help me feel a little bit safer right now?”

Myth 4: You have an addictive personality

We often focus so intensely on the behaviors we want to change that we forget all behavior is functional. In other words, there’s a reason it seems like everything from sugar to sex to whiskey creates an addictive spiral for you. Is it really that you have an addictive personality, or is it possible that you have emotional injuries, unaddressed traumas, or turbulent relationships that create comfort-seeking behaviors? When you say, “I have an addictive personality,” it places the problem as an internal one rather than recognizing the complex interplay of internal and environmental stressors.

What you can do: Instead of thinking, “I have an addictive personality. This is who I am,” ask yourself, “Is there anything about myself or my life that I am afraid to address?”

As addiction expert Gabor Mate put it, “…the first question is not why the addiction; it’s why the pain?”

Then, ask yourself what supportive resources are in your life that can help make it less overwhelming so you can have sup-

port when you confront the monsters under your bed.

Myth 5: Mental health is about mindset—all you need to do is think positive

The biggest myth about mental health is that mental health is a mental process. If you’ve ever tried to think your way out of anxiety, talk yourself out of an addiction, or “affirmation” your way out of depression, you know that none of those things work very well. Are you the problem? Or is it possible that the problem is not in your mind but in your body? If you broke your leg, you wouldn’t be able to positively think your way back into walking. A physical problem needs a physical solution. Often, what we call “mental” health issues are the result of our central nervous system doing what it’s designed to do: alert us when there’s a problem. Mental health is not a mental process—it’s a physiological process.

What you can do: Learning to speak the language of the nervous system goes beyond the scope of this article, but you can remind yourself that “mind work” doesn’t usually work as a first-line intervention because the problem is physiological. When you know just a little bit about your brain, the capacity for choice is restored (to whatever degree you have safety and access to resources), and you can return to the driver’s seat of your life. If you’re asking Dr. Google for help with your mental health, try a search for “somatic tools for mental health” and “how can I help regulate my nervous system.”

Follow along with Psychotherapist and author of The Science of Stuck Britt Frank [MSW, LSCSW, SEP] on Instagram (@brittfrank). To ask a question about recovering from the last few years, or anything else regarding mental health, reach out to britt@ thepitchkc.com

Disclaimer: This article is for entertainment purposes only and is not to be taken as official mental health treatment or professional medical advice.

String Sprouts

By Beth Lipoff

On the surface, String Sprouts is about teaching kids to play music. With numerous young violinists and cellists enrolled, it does just that. However, there’s a lot more to it than just learning quarter notes and bow technique.

The program, run by Heartland Chamber Music, is also trying to enrich family relationships. When the kids attend their group lessons for either violin or cello, usually their caregiver must come too.

“A great deal of it is for them to build that parent connection. All of our parents say they have better relationships with their children. They learn to work with their child,” says Kathy Cook, executive director of Heartland Chamber Music.

String Sprouts uses various sites in the metro public schools, as well as places like El Centro and Asbury United Methodist Church.

There’s a program during the school day within Kansas City Public Schools, and if families are on free and reduced school lunches, they also meet String Sprouts’ income requirements.

In 2017, HCM launched this early-childhood education program, modeling it on one at the Omaha Conservatory of Music. This past year, 103 students participated. Their numbers went down during the pandemic and are still recovering.

Most kids start at age 4, and if they stick with it, they’ll be with the program for five years.

“Our hope is that there’s a music program for them to move into at their school. If there isn’t, [some Sprouts] take private lessons from some of our teachers at a greatly reduced rate,” Cook says.

By the end of the program, kids can play and read music, but they have also worked on their fine motor skills, learned how to stick with the activity, and built up some confidence.

“[Parents] see their child able to study more effectively, just because they understand that you have to keep trying at things,” Cook says.

It certainly has taken some persistence—especially for those participating when everything had to go online.

Zsanaé Davis Accatcha’s daughter Journey is in her fourth year playing cello, and her other daughters, 5-year-olds Har-

mony and Destiny, just started the violin.

“To do school online, regular school, and then try to practice an instrument online—it was hard. It was rough,” Davis Accatcha says. “Having to help her practice and try to figure out how because I’m the one physically there with her—but it did make me more engaged. I was a pseudo-teacher during the pandemic year.”

For the kids in the program, everything is free, including the instrument and lessons. If they continue playing in any music program after the five years are up, HCM will rent them an instrument for $80 per year.

“Whether they become professional musicians or not, there are numerous studies that show the power of music in our lives. It’s critically important for as many children as possible to have that opportunity to try,” Cook says.

Some kids, like Harmony and Destiny, live for the performances.

“My twins saw their big sister perform with the UMKC symphony, and it was like, ‘I want to be on stage too. I want to perform

too.’ They are excited. They’ve only been practicing so they can perform on stage,” Davis Accatcha says.

They just had that performance—the biggest one of the year—in May, playing alongside the University of Missouri-Kansas City Conservatory Orchestra.

Overall, it’s been a positive influence on Davis Accatcha’s family.

“My oldest daughter, the moment her little sisters started playing, her interest piqued. She wanted to be a leader. She always says she’s scared, but she gets up there and she just tries. It creates such confidence in her that I’m still helping to cultivate,” Davis Accatcha says.

You don’t have to know how to play a concerto to volunteer with String Sprouts. They always need extra hands during concert days to distribute programs, guide folks backstage, and even buy or bake cookies for the events. If you are musical, they’d love help tuning instruments on those days.

For more information, visit stringsproutskc. org/support-sprouts-kc

String Sprouts students perform in their annual concert with the UMKC Conservatory Orchestra in May. Rachael Jane