Waves of Anamnesis

Lo_uie

She approached the water without fear, a different kettle of fish. “The water is waist deep, nothing to worry,” she thought as she proceeds to the shallowest portion of the beach. “The elevation of the shore is wobbly, nothing to worry,” she thought as she foots fight with small waves of the sea. From a distant she heard her mom shouts, “Play dead, nothing to worry, the water will support you.” She guessed there’s nothing to worry, the water seemed to be friendly. She gave herself to the sea with trust and calmness. The waves are worth it, it soothed her soul amid all the city chaos. “Yes, there’s nothing to worry,” she thought. But nope. The next wave marked the beginning of the agony she was about to get into. The waves grew bigger than before, disrupting her calmness, ruining her balance, and shaking her trust with the water. She seeks solace and warrant from the sand she believed can be reached by her feet and hand. But nope. The sand, it was gone. Her feet can’t reach the floor, the ground, the sand. She could see her mom not too far away, laughing and playing with the waves that’s drowning her. She started yelling, shaking, and reaching for help. But nope. They apparently assumed she was pranking since the water was clearly just waist deep, but they didn't know it was only for them. From a small distance, she is struggling. She is sinking. She exhausted whatever little energy was left in her to the point where she couldn't feel her limbs anymore. She was panting but there was no air to breath. She begins to swallow the water, choking on it. And.. Slowly, she lost a sense of awareness of self or surroundings, everything was dark. A long flashes of memories were rushing. Memories forgotten but casted back to her mind by the splashing water. Indeed, water has memory. She saw her little self pouting and smiling while looking at her brothers running, her sisters playing, and mother cooking and on the verge of shouting. “Khattteee” Buried memories were dug up, obliterated past were brought up, and thought consigned to oblivion were revived. Both the water and the overflowing recollection and emotion are drowning her. It’s too much, she gave up. Her vision blurred and turned pitch black. …………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………

…………………………………… She slowly opened her eyes. After two years she’s back to the place which made her experience the precipice of life and death. “Happy death Anniversary Ma,” she whispered on the wind after reminiscing the moment when she nearly died and her mother saved her life. She lied on the seaside looking up at the sky, with a tinged of mourning and realization of things continuous passing. She desired for a happy ending but acknowledged that in life people are fading. Every year since her mother’s passing, Khate comes back to the sea again to remind herself the bittersweet fleeting nature of life and the impermanence of everything.