WTF: a celebration of the weird and wonderful

issue one

W H AT T H E FU C K

for free

T H E A R T OF OR G A S M S / T H E B OUN D A RIES OF A r t / C A M P US L I V IN G /

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Contents 4

EDITORIALS

8

NEWS

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INVESTIGATION

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OPINIONS

50

wollongong warriors

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REVIEWS

32

DEBATE

37

BAND REVIEW

39

53

s a f e s pa c e s

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sharehouse living

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f l o At y o u r b o at

PULL OUT POSTER

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boudaries of art

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FEATURES

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building blocks

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welcome to

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fluffy doesn’t live here

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f e at u r e a r t i s t

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c r e at i v e w r i t i n g

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poems

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photography

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gig guide

wollongong

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a l i t t l e d e at h ? o r orgasm?

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campus living

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uow out of session

Disclosure: The contents of this publication are made for and by the students of the University of Wollongong. Views expressed are of individual authors and do not necessarily reflect those of WUSA or the publisher.

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Acknowledgement of country: Tertangala and WUSA acknowledge the traditional custodians of the land upon which we meet and work, that of the Dharawal people. We pay our respect to their elders past, present and future, for they hold the memories, the traditions, the culture and the hopes for Indigenous Australia.

Disclaimer: Responsibility for the Tertangala is taken by the WUSA council. The University of Wollongong accepts no responsibility for this publication.

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EDITOR’S NOTE

Let me ask you this, what’s the definition of ‘fucked up’?

TERT ONLINE

Meet Your 2015 Online Content Editors, Elodie And Georgia

This issue we se sought to divulge into the world of the weird and wonderful, and celebrate the things that make you pull a face and say “WTF”. We’ve got a plethora of articles from pieces sure to make you feel welcome to Wollongong and ready to take on #unilyf for the first time, or for another year, and we’ve also got more thought-provoking articles such as Jake Cupitt’s ‘Beautiful Agony’: an article sure to leave your lips shaped in a big O. On a more serious note, ex-co-editor Brittany Carter bears the naked truth of nudity within the Performance degree at UOW and how this affects the integrity of a degree renown for it’s quality.

We’ve also featured photography by Heather Wortes from Woodford Folk Festival, held in QLD yearly.

Captivated by the ‘monsters’ at this festival, she was keen to expose the story behind their creation- in a much Frankenstineesque manner.

On a more personal level it’s always very easy to go into a job where no one really expects a lot from you and the only way you have to go is up. That isn’t this job. The Tertangala’s 2014 editors, Belinda Quinn and Brittany Carter did an incredible job last year and successfully delivered quality publication after quality publication. They really made this magazine everything it is today and set a new standard of excellence with it. God damn them. We may be inexperienced but we have dedicated ourselves to upholding the quality of The Tertangala and providing our readers with equally thought provoking, moving and entertaining content as previously offered. We hope to do Bel and Britt justice and carry on their great work to the best of our abilities.

This year, we want The Tert to become part of the big leagues, and with our addition of Instagram (the_tert), a more comprehensive and up-to-date online media platform and an already established twitter we can see a glimmer of bigger things at the end of the tunnel.

Now, to give ourselves a fighting chance, we recently attended the Media Express NEWS 2015 conference, an event which instructs university editors know how to “edit a student magazine and not get scurvy”, among other things. Not only did we make many

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by Georgie Holloway and Elodie May www.tertangala.net

by Gemma Mollenhauer and Bec Wiggins @GemmaMolle017 @youfoundbec

like-minded friends, but we also gained valuable insight into the industry here’s an idea of what we’ve learned from some of the best in our field: On receiving articles post deadline with Grace: Liz Flux, editor of Voiceworks magazine: “I’m probably inside your house if it’s past deadline.”

Amy Middleton, editor of Archer magazine: “Drinking tea.”

Liz Flux: “at the foot of your bed ...it’s getting weird.”

Amy Middleton: “My advice around controversy is that it’s awesome if you can make it work” Alan Weedon, freelance photographer, writer and designer: “do what you do best and link to the rest” Elizabeth Redman, journalist and subeditor for Eureka Report: “News is something someone doesn’t want printed. All else is advertising”

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Jose Vine, teaches on the Journalism Program at RMIT University: “As journalists, as professionals, we have no opinion.” “It’s up to us as journalists to do our ‘dirty vital job’” With this knowledge now under our belts, we go fourth in our attempt to ‘such wow, much amaze’ you with our upcoming issues of The Tertangala. Get excited UOW, your student mag is upping it’s game this year!

Love, Bec & Gem

E: Hello dear reader! You’re reading this on a dead tree, how quaint.

G: Yeah ‘sup guys! Pleased to meet you.

E: If you like journalism, 2015 is going to bring great things for you. The Tertangala has relaunched its online site and Georgia and I are heading up a capable news team who are keen to report on breaking stories and to write in-depth opinion pieces.

G: We were so excited to reinvent the website that there’s already a bunch of content there for you to read! Our news team is full of incredibly passionate journalism students, hoping to showcase their work and keep you informed. It’s an open invitation to so feel free to jump onboard.

E: Seriously. Our news team gets to write news stories with the best of them. It’s a great way for you aspiring journalists to hone your skills, and build up your portfolio. That way, your future employers can see how much you’re gonna kick ass at your job!

G: But it’s not easy. We want to make sure our stories are completely up to date, factual and free of tabloid bias.

E: Plus, we don’t want to let a day go by without a new story up on the site.

G: And it’s thanks to our web manager Jarrod Small (seriously a big big thank you) our stories are up instantly, so we can break news as it’s happening.

E: Jump on to the site at http:tertangala.net (it’s a pity you can’t hyperlink paper) and tell us what you think. We love comments!

G: We want to be constantly improving the site to make it the best online student newspaper IN THE WORLD. Or just the state.

E: Yup, we might need to aim a little lower.

G: For now.

E: In the mean-time, we are lucky to work with two bright and inspirational women who happen to be editing this magazine, Bec and Gemma.

G: So our bosses are two girls and so are we.

E: Grrl Power!

G: Take that Mr. Murdoch!

E: But seriously, there isn’t a single major metropolitan newspaper in Australia that has a woman as its Editorin-Chief.

“Take that Mr. Murdoch!”

G: So it’s pretty great to be kicking the status quo.

E: Honestly, that is probably my favourite thing about the Tertangala. The possibilities are limitless. We get to write the stories we’ve always wanted to write.

G: Or create something that it is missing in the mainstream media.

E: So get excited and tune in to the Tert online.

G: It’s your tert.

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WUSA PRESIDENT’S REPORT

By Peter Munford @petermunford93

Hi UOW Students!

Welcome to a new year of fun and exciting times at our fine institution. I hope that you all had a good break and are ready for the trials that lay ahead, whether they be struggling through assessments/ exams, having to turn up to class hung-over, or simply navigating through building 19.

My name is Peter Munford and I am the President of WUSA for 2015, elected by the student body in 2014. I answer to a council of 17 other students who were also elected last year. WUSA= Wollongong Undergraduate Students’ Association, is run by students for students, and will assist you in the following areas: • • • • • • • •

Cheap textbooks, food and drinks, printing free breakfast Fun events, run by students A WUSA Membership is the best way to save money on campus. It costs $20 per year and gets you the following: Free printing (10 double sided pages per day) Free BBQs BookBank discounts Free events

WUSA is expanding its services in 2015. We have received SAF funding to expand the BookBank, expand our free breakfast to include a fortnightly FREE HOT BREAKFAST for all students, and a new bike rental scheme known as the Bike Bank. The WUSA space is located on the ground floor of building 19, where you will find our free printing and free breakfast. As we did last year, WUSA will offer $15 memberships to all returning WUSA members to thank them for their loyalty to WUSA. In recent times, Higher Education funding has become a hot topic. The Abbott Government is moving proposals to change higher education funding to allow Universities to set their own fees.

Make no mistake; these changes will hurt students, with degree fees likely to skyrocket under the new structure. The National Union of Students (NUS), who WUSA is affiliated with, has run a campaign over the last year to fight these changes. Last year

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“ Make no mistake; these changes will hurt students” we were successful in seeing the legislation delayed, but the fight is not over. The Abbott Government and Education Minister Christopher Pyne still plans to introduce these changes.

NUS will continue to take this fight to the Government in 2015, with a new campaign known as ‘Demand a Better Future’, with rallies planned around the country. WUSA will be heavily involved with this campaign, with rallies on campus and lobbying of senior administration planned. WUSA is committed to fighting for fair accessible education and fighting for the rights of UOW students.

You can find WUSA on Facebook. We are currently updating our website, with a plan to have it fully upgraded by the start of Spring Session. Come and see us at the WUSA space, and join our fight for UOW students.

Enjoy 2015 at UOW! Peter Munford, WUSA President

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TERT NEWS

TERT NEWS

by Gemma Mollenhauer @ GemmaMolle017

by Jake Cupitt @jakecupitt

M USI C F A R M ERS RE C OR D S : SE W IN G T H E SEE D S OF L O C A L TA L EN T

RI D E FOR A C A USE After spending New Year’s Eve 2013 in hospital with her friend, Chels, who had suffered another attack caused by her Multiple Sclerosis (MS), Lucy was struck with a light-bulb moment of epic proportions.

If you’re new to Wollongong this year, or you’re a keen vinyl enthusiast like me, or you’re even just looking for a cool place to hang out, I would first and foremost recommend Music Farmers Records.

Having just relocated, from crown lane to a more happenin’ spot, Music Farmers is now at 228 Keira Street, next to The Grand Hotel, in the centre of the city. With stacks and stacks of records, CD’s, cult classic books, magazines and DVD’s, it’s definitely a place where cats from all alleys are welcome.

“The ride starts on the 1st July and will take from 5 to 8 days. We begin at Tennant Creek and end in Alice Springs and all funds raised will go towards creating awareness about MS, ” Lucy states. With Chels as her inspiration, Lucy hopes to raise over $5,000 between now and the anticipated end date of her 550km bike ride on the 11th July, where a final auction and dinner will be held in Alice Springs.

Growing up together, Lucy has watched Chels overcome many challenges with her easy going “I’m okay, don’t fuss” attitude after being diagnosed with MS at a young age.

Affecting over 2, 500,000 people around the world, MS is a disease of the central nervous system with no cure. The disease is manageable through various treatments to ease the symptoms and slow down the course of the disease, however, with symptoms ranging from any combination of muscular spasms, fatigue and various neurological symptoms and disturbances, it’s surprising not more is being done to combat this debilitating disease.

The aim of the MS Australia foundation is ultimately to ‘minimise the impact of multiple sclerosis on all individuals affected by the disease, their families, carers and the community by offering a wide range of assistance, services and equipment.’ With this in mind, Lucy is doing her bit to help those in need and, more specifically, to help a sister out.

Supporting the MS foundation, Lucy “hopes to increase the awareness of MS throughout a broad range of communities. It is an illness that people don’t know enough about and I feel by doing something that stands out It will help people become aware of it.”

If you would like to join the ride or donate to the auction please contact me on l.mcglynn@hotmail. com or 0477075488. Please follow the links above to donate to MS Australia. Open your hearts and pockets to this worthy cause and support those living with MS.

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Music Farmers is joint-owned by two guys, Jeb Taylor and Nick Irwin, they also run two music labels. One is a locally focused label called Farmer & Owl that’s coowned with Ben Tillman (Interesting side note Tillman and Taylor founded and run the Yours & Owls festival in Wollongong). Farmer & Owl is quite new but has already begun establishing its roots with young local bands from all genres that wish to get their names out of the Illawarra and into the big wide world.

The duo’s second record label is called Impedance Records. Taylor said “It’s a lot more about working with artists that have already established themselves a profile and mainly is focused on rock/metal punk stuff.”

When I first met Irwin and Taylor it was for an audiovisual piece on the underground culture of vinyl records. In an interview with Irwin we spoke about the changing popularity of the music medium and where it stands in todays modern digital age. Irwin said, “It’s reaching the mainstream shops that are starting to sell records, its very refreshing to see the younger generations getting into vinyl, from ten year olds to sixty year olds.” Of course there are enthusiasts that

have never given up on the wax, and those are the ones that kept it alive after it almost died out when CD’s came banging at the door.

I asked Irwin why he thought the technology was still around and didn’t completely vanish like Beta-Max or 8Track. He said, “Well you can’t get rid of a good thing. If something’s really good then you can not get rid of it.” That reminds me of one of my favourite Jack White quotes, when he compares the invention of the light bulb to vinyl. White says, “When they invented the light bulb they got it right the first time, the classic filament bulb is what we all like, why try and reinvent something if it works just fine?” Irwin also touched on the tactile aspects that vinyl offers where other mediums fall short. He said, “You’ve got the physical product, you’ve got something people can touch. You don’t want this digital mp3 file in cyber space.”

With Music Farmers moving to their new location just off the main drag hopefully what will come back to Wollongong is a tighter sense of a musical community. A sort of central hub where people can hang out and compare the newest album they picked up for a steal at the local Vinnie’s. Saying to your mate “they hardly knew what they had on their hands!” I think Irwin said it well when he said, “Its like you want to go through your mates collection and see what he’s got, what sort of taste he has, instead of saying ‘oh lets just look at this digital file on my phone.” Vinyl reconnects the old with the new, what’s timeless with what’s priceless.

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TERT NEWS

Fa r m e r a n d th e Owl F e s t i val : ‘The Imaginarium’ Announced for W o ll on gong This March, Farmer and the Owl is once again bringing to Wollongong a festival brimming with world-class music acts and art from around the world.

Following a successfully sold out event from last year, this festival—The Imaginarium, will return to the grounds of UOW to provide a “unique experience, filled with total emersion”, as organiser Ben Tillman states.

The 2015 lineup incorporates numerous international artists “from America, New Zealand, South Africa, [and] a lot of Aussie bands including Melbs and SA, QLD and Sydney”, and Ben also states that, “We’ve [also] tried to put on some more solid, established Wollongong bands as well”. On top of with this, a selection of top bands from throughout Australia and some local artists are yet to be announced.

With their aim to “throw a cool event, bringing different music that wouldn’t normally be down here together” combined with their current line-up, it seems this event will be more than just a pipe dream.

Kicking off the ticket sales, Farmer & The Owl Festival offers a limited allocation of ‘pay what you want’ tickets, in reaction to the over-commercialisation of music and arts. “There’s not much happening in

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by Gemma Mollenhauer @ GemmaMolle017

Wollongong, so it’s nice to provide something new.

We want it to be something that will stand up against any other city”, Ben states, that’s why they organised the pay what you want scheme. “We just wanted to see what people actually wanted to pay for a festival, and we had some people paying a fair amount…it was a good experiment and created a lot of interest within the festival”, he explained.

With the festival shifting its focus towards the arts, Ben was excited to announce the addition of The Imaginarium, stating “a lot of effort into the arts side, so we hope it to be a trippy sort of festival and freak some people out”. The idea for The Imaginarium came from a desire to create an uninhabited haven of unique and vibrant creativity. With the help of 24 select bands, and with more to be announced, The Imaginarium will come to life with digital projections, quaint market and food stalls as well as local and international visual artists and conceptualists.

With this boutique festival evolving from its predecessor last year, the aim is to make it bigger and better than ever before, as well as give Wollongong means to entice bands from around the world to our shores.

Line up includes: Bad//Dreems - Bass Drum Of Death (US) - Birds With Thumbs - Cabins - Carb On Carb (NZ) – The Cherry Dolls - The DHDFD’s (NZ) - Drunk Mums - DZ Deathrays - -Hockey Dad - Hy-Test - Jebediah - Lunatics On Pogosticks - The Mess Hall - The Peep Tempel - PH Fat (South Africa) – Pinheads - Richard In Your Mind - Shining Bird - Spookyland - Step-Panther -Sunbeam Sound Machine - TEES - Totally Unicorn - The Walking Who - You Beauty

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INVESTIGATION

by Brittany Carter @ _BrittanyCarter

in ves ti g at i o n students question nudity in perform -ing arts course The University of Wollongong’s Performing Arts degree has recently been scrutinised as reports of students being encouraged to undress for major roles emerge. Is it necessary to get naked to make it? Brittany Carter investigates.

The University of Wollongong’s Performing Arts degree has recently been scrutinised as reports of students being encouraged to undress for major roles emerge.

One student in particular, is unhappy with the emphasis she feels the university places on nudity in the performance realm.

Jessica* started her Performance degree at the university almost seven years ago. Now studying a different degree at UOW, she says that among many other reasons, the prominence of clothe changing and nudity in the course turned her off her studies.

“There was no requirement for getting naked especially in first year. However, towards the end of first year, the acted moments in class that were more private were often deemed better,” she says.

According to Jessica, girls are expected to be comfortable in underwear or without bras in class exercises and the same goes for guys, in their underwear or nude.

“Students often felt encouraged to do scenes with clothing changes and semi-nude scenes,” she says.

“By second year it was a question of who was willing to take off their clothes, to be naked or semi-naked for the end of year performance.”

She recalls a teacher blatantly asking her class who was willing to get naked for the final production, which was also a major assessment.

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Students were told they could be cast as a main part if they were willing to appear nude.

Jessica acknowledges the fact that the degree and industry require its professionals to be comfortable with their bodies.

However, she believes the attitude of UOW’s Performing Arts School “disadvantages students who have different belief systems or value systems for their bodies, because they aren’t willing to get naked in front of their peers and an audience for a certificate”.

“I left the course for multiple reasons, but in hearing that the entire cast for third year shows were naked to varying degrees, I knew I wouldn’t have been comfortable with it,” she says.

Although members of the UOW Performing Arts staff were unable to provide official comment, they did recommend that students with such concerns talk to their Discipline Leader or Sub Dean.

They also have the option to make a complaint via client services.

“Roles are given to students on the basis on hard work and ability and certainly not on their willingness to perform naked,” Professor Sarah Miller, Head of the School of Arts, English and Media said through email. “Marks are awarded according to the published criteria in the subject outlines, and team marked by academic staff in the program – not by an individual director”.

The school’s Discipline Leader Tim

Maddock also weighed in on the debate through email. “Nudity and various other disguises are part of the language of performance and theatre as they are in the visual arts,” he said.

“No-one would accuse a lifedrawing class of either prurience or exploitation. In the performance course we teach actors to make decisions regarding their practice, they need to learn to take direction but this does not preclude the possibility of saying no,” he said.

On a similar note, an incident involving an 18-year-old Performing Arts student at Flinders University gained media attention in August 2013. The Adelaide student felt conflicted between her beliefs and determination for success when she was asked by teachers whether she would be willing to perform topless for an upcoming play. After refusing to consider the option, she was told she could possibly miss out on future leading roles. Her mother, furious with the situation, then made a complaint on a local radio station.

“I know they are young adults but they are still impressionable and they have no right to make our kids think that this is acceptable behaviour and they typecast in the future for parts,” she told 891 ABC Adelaide. “These kids are under pressure thinking they have to do this to make it.”

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INVESTIGATION

Flinders University defended the teachers’ actions, but said it would investigate the claim. “It’s not gratuitous nudity. We don’t do it for the sake of it,” Strategic Professor of the Creative Arts Julian Meyrick said. “We do all sorts of play and some plays involve those kinds of acts.”

“We have to train [students] for the field and so we give them the option but we don’t insist on it. They can always say no and they’re not penalised for it.”

At the time, various articles written by performance academics and industry professionals circulated.

Most argued that aspiring actors should aim to remain versatile, and that nudity in Performing Arts courses was only setting them up for the real world.

One opinion piece written by Peter Goers, an actor, director and host of The Evening Show on the same radio station, declared acting was not for “prima donnas or their prudish mothers”.

The article, printed in the Sunday

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Mail on August 24, 2013, read: “If you’re asked to stand naked on a pole ask where the pole is. Just do it. If you don’t do what’s asked of you there are hundreds who will.

Embrace every opportunity of faith shown in you.”

Goers mentions the battles Australian theatre had to fight throughout history to be allowed such freedom of expression, as past actors were treated as criminals if they swore onstage and police attended dress rehearsals to dictate what was and wasn’t said. In the 1960s and ‘70s these battles were won and the rules dictating theatre “changed and the forces of conservation lost”. It is here he remembers entire casts starting to appear with some level of nudity if texts required it.

“The world moved on,” Goers says. “Except for this anonymous mother who wants to be the arbiter of what is taught and presented at the Flinders University drama department... Even the idea of a complaint these days will change

“They can always say no and they’re not penalised for it”

policy. That’s risk aversion and it’s killing us. We’ve disgracefully seen the University of Adelaide become a censor of art. It censors smoking in any of its increasingly limited theatrical productions in its increasingly fewer theatres.”

Flinders University released a statement later in the month, stating only three of the 15 productions they had staged in the last 18 months had included “fleeting glances of the unclothed human body”. However, according to some local New South Wales actors and students, the University of Wollongong has a much higher ratio.

After Jessica disclosed her concerns with the course, the Tertangala initiated an investigation into the claims.

Speaking to nine students from a range of different universities and academies in Queensland, New South Wales and even New York, the majority seem to think that UOW has a reputation for bare and out-there performances.

Contemporary performer Kyle Nozza has been working in the Wollongong theatre scene for eight years. He said he’s seen plenty of productions at UOW and has heard a lot about the course through a friend studying at the University.

“I’d heard of and witnessed plenty of nudity in the Performing Arts sector of UOW,” Kyle said. “In every single theatre performance that I attended of the Creative Arts department, there was extreme and unnecessary nudity.”

“I once witnessed a man perform a monologue in which he completely undressed and walked around naked.

The nudity seemed to have zero relevance to what was happening on stage and seemed more to be a test of character.

For the most part, the nudity occurring in these performances seemed to be purely to see how far an actor or actress would go.”

A Law and Arts student, Kyle was originally considering enrolling in the University’s Performing Arts degree, but upon hearing about the nudity and general running of the course, he decided not to pursue it.

“The nudity at UOW performances

are a joke, they have lost the shock factor that used to be associated with bearing all on stage,” he says. “It’s not necessary and doesn’t have any emotional intent. I’ve always believed that the ability to take direction and say yes to directors is a great asset. But that would be only in a collaborative sense.” Zoë Vesey, a second-year performance student at the Wollongong University said while she hadn’t yet been asked to partake in nude scenes, some students in her class had done so on their own premises. However, Zoë expects such propositions to come up in the future, having seen senior peers’ shows.

As a Christian, she has already decided she will decline such invitations because it is against her beliefs. “I understand that that might mean that I possibly don’t get the major role because I’m not willing to go that extra step,” she says. “It is a bit frustrating thinking that I might be one of the few people in the Performance course who isn’t getting naked.”

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INVESTIGATION

However, Zoë does have a few insecurities about the decision.

“Personally I’m more worried about other people in the course sort of judging me or thinking that I’m too innocent to get naked, when really it’s a personal and religious choice of mine,” she says.

Queensland based Georgina Pead, has just graduated with a Bachelor of Arts in Contemporary and Applied Theatre at Griffith University. She was shocked to hear that students were dealing with issues of nudity at UOW. “Nudity has never really been a huge thing in my course... at my uni you’re not actually allowed to get naked onstage,” she said. “You have to be wearing underwear... we’ve been told that since day dot.”

Her tutor has suggested onstage clothing changes in some scenes, but that is as far as Griffith University allows.

“I’ve been in one performance where we changed clothes onstage. Got in top, pants,

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changed in front of the audience.

Our director said ‘look I have an idea, if you’re uncomfortable doing this in front of an audience then I’m not going to make you do it’ and then he gave everyone the option of voting if they were comfortable.”

“I said yes as I was comfortable with it. He said ‘I’m not thinking anything gratuitous. You can wear little short-shorts and a bra’. It was just a quick change in front of the audience.”

Recent UOW graduate Sam* transferred from Performance to another degree. Like Kyle, she questioned whether teachers used nudity to test students’ boundaries.

“I always knew I wanted to be a teacher and I knew that if there were images of me being naked for a performance that might not be the best representation for the job,” Sam says. “I was never pressured [about nudity] as such. I think I avoided it in a way.”

However she does remember feeling pressured by one teacher,

who wanted her to cut her hair short for a role. “I didn’t do it in the end but they kind of questioned my value as an actor because I wouldn’t do it,” she says. Sam explains that institutions such as the National Institute of Dramatic Art (NIDA) rarely take on students directly after High School. They do this because they want them to have a decent amount of life experience that they can draw emotions from to perform onstage.

She has noticed that UOW doesn’t adopt this perspective, with most students studying directly after their HSC at 17-18, possibly still at a vulnerable age. “I think at that age you are still learning so much about yourself that it is dangerous to take on such an intensive course that focuses a lot on self analysis.

There are many other institutions such as the Australian Theatre for Young People and Actors Centre that aren’t university graded and that encourage a really positive self expression.”

Sam also brought a strange ritual to the Tertangala’s attention. Each year graduating performance students from UOW organise an end of year party. This is set up like a grad ball, inviting all Performance students and lecturers. The party holds a tradition that sees graduates come up to the stage and individually chose anyone in the crowd to give them a graduating kiss.

“I guess because people so often have to kiss for shows it’s just a funny thing and most people choose their friends anyway,” Sam says. “But on two occasions a lecturer was nominated to kiss two students and it was really inappropriate... like a 40-year-old man making out with a 20-yearold.”

None of the other institutes whose students the Tertangala spoke with, including Griffith University, Brent Street, the Broadway Dance Centre and Actors Centre Australia, had similar traditions.

Some of these students even

brought up that they had heard of a kissing tradition at UOW’s Performing School before we had a chance to ask them about it.

Despite the confusion the above students felt, there were others that gradually grew to find nudity in the classroom and drama space quite normal. Jane*, a student that has graduated from a Bachelor of Performing Arts at UOW, is now pursuing a career in television.

She is adamant that students are never forced into nude scenes or roles during their study.

“There was pressure in the second year when it got to ‘who is going to get naked and whose not?’ But it was never forced... It was more of an offer than an expectation,” Jane said. She says the end of year show featured a fair bit of nudity. “I think there were about 16 people on the stage at one point who were in some form naked. I had my bottom covered

but my top part exposed... there was also the choice to cover yourself completely,” she says.

“It was never a situation where they said ‘you’re not going to be in this thing because you won’t get naked’... The director would come and say ‘this is what I want for this scene, this is the image that I want. It’s up to you if you’d like to or not’ and they’d give us image sourcing that you’d look at and realise wow that’s beautiful I want to be a part of that.”

Although she acknowledges that UOW seems to have some sort of reputation for nude performances, Jane is unsure why.

“I have come out of uni and spoken to people about the fact I did a UOW degree and whoever knows the degree, the first thing they ask is ‘oh did you have to get naked?’... It is definitely the reputation that we have,” she said.

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Despite this, Jane believes these intimate moments benefited her acting studies. She says the nudity involved was more about setting a scene and character, rather than including it for shock factor alone.

“Personally I felt like the only times I did get naked was when I [felt] like it added to the scene or story,” she says. “There’s a sort of power that [people] get when they are naked on stage. A lot of my friends who did the degree have gone off and embraced that nudity onstage, and they’ve gone and done their own things where they are presenting themselves as a body and a piece of art rather than a human being.”

“The group of people I was with made me feel very comfortable and there were points where there were people running around backstage naked and it wasn’t even a thing... We’d all be standing backstage together and the girls would be rubbing their nipples up on the cold wall [to make them hard]. By the end of it everybody was just so comfortable,” she said.

Michelle Dawson graduated from a UOW Performing Arts degree back in 2012 and is now working as aburlesque dancer.

She is also grateful for the realistic approach the school took towards performance and says it prepared her for the competitive industry.

“I’m a bigger girl, I’m a size 14 and so I had my own thoughts of my naked body not being the [type] that’s represented in the media or as the typical perfect naked body,” she says. “At university I had a lot of opportunity to be comfortable in my own skin and know what my body can represent in a positive light. Since finishing university now I’m with Burlesque Sydney

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and that is my job... to celebrate my naked body.”

Michelle says UOW Performing Arts staff respected those uncomfortable with nudity. She believes tertiary students are in a position to make up their own mind about such situations and should be speaking to teachers or subject coordinators if they feel pressured.

“Nudity is something that is explored often in main stage and off the main stage... if you’re not willing to be naked even though the script requires it then that’s your loss as an actor. “ “Its representative of what the industry is like and [what] the university was preparing us for.” “Our bodies are objects sometimes and we accept that when we chose to be actors as our profession. Sometimes our body will be representative of something else, and nudity might be the best way to express that,” she says.

“Nudity is a big thing in theatre at the moment, I think maybe Jessica‘s problem isn’t with the university it’s with contemporary theatre... if you’ve got a problem with it then maybe it’s not the profession for you.”

Michelle explains that different sorts of actors come out of different institutions or universities, stating that many of the students coming out of institutions like NIDA were taught more “straight-laced” theatre, which may lead them to land a job in television or film where nudity is less prominent.

“The style of performance that is studied at the University of

Wollongong where a lot of what we are studying is post dramatic theatre... [was] where nudity was usually involved. It’s more imagistic... images are almost as important or considered as important as characterisation or the words or the script or the costuming. Therefore the images created are very impactful for the audience and nudity is often a tool we use to impact them... or to demystify the naked body.

There is a difference between universities for sure, but I think that’s what makes UOW strong,” she said.

To deal with the issue, Jessica suggested UOW provide students interested in enrolling in the Performing Arts degree with a warning of the sort of contemporary theatre arts scene it is a part of. She argues that they by doing so, students would already be aware of the possible highshock qualities and nudity the course may involve.“It was never advertised too me that UOW’s Performance course was focused on... post dramatic [theatre], which has a lot of nudity,” she says. “I agree that as an actor the directors words are what is followed and if the script chosen by the director calls for nudity and a student/s accepts that then that’s what an actor’s job is... to follow the script and the director. However from my personal experience, one of the reasons the majority of students that left by second year [left so because of] the amount of nudity asked of them, which felt expected.” *Name has been changed to protect student identities.

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GAME ON

by Jayden Perry @_JaydenPerry

P o p C u lt u r e I s A Powerful Thing

Pop culture is a powerful thing.

For a lot of people, myself included, the realms of pop culture have become something of a home; a space to enjoy, relax, learn and grow. I know that I would not be who I am today without the influences of countless fictional characters and hours spent in game worlds.

I love comics, all the geeky television I can get my hands on, anime and overly complicated card games. However, video games are the one aspect of this culture that has had the greatest impact on me as a person. Games are an incredibly unique medium that continues to grow; seemingly everyday something new and exciting is created within the digital realms.

Since their birth, games have come out of the arcades, into our homes and now, into the hands of almost everyone via our mobile phones. As they’ve made this transition they’ve quite directly changed the way we interact with the world. It’s fair to say that at one point or another, most of you will have played some sort of game. Whether mindlessly candy crushing on a long trip, swinging a Wii remote around the room in Wii Sports, or believe it or not,

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swiping left and right on Tinder, you’ve probably been enjoying a game, maybe without even knowing it.

It’s this widespread, increasingly blurred way that games are bleeding into our lives that makes them both important and fascinating.

The idea of gamification, a process where real activities use aspects of games (such as design and mechanics), is just another reason the principles of play are becoming so important to the modern world.

But there’s a real disconnect between the way games are sometimes seen and what they’re actually capable off. This is something I’ve seen first hand both from an outside audience and also often encouraged by a large, sometimes quite vocal, assortment of people from the gaming community.

Games are often considered, in boiled down terms, as childish, overly violent or immature - we’ve even been told they’re responsible for a lot of real world damage.

This is a view definitely not held by everyone, with many people sharing my optimism that as a medium games can be much more than this outside image.

The games themselves are really echoing this too as they hit a period of unparalleled accessibility in both production and distribution. Over the last few years alone I’ve seen Never Alone preserve and share native Alaskan culture with a huge audience and Minecraft used in classes to teach real world skills like coding, basic circuitry, as well as the basics of building and creativity. Games like Depression Quest and BrokenFolx have even tackled some of the harder, touchier subjects aiding in the understanding and treatment of mental illness and gender identity.

All of these games are simple to play; short but meaningful, and ultimately quite engaging in the way they explore the world.

This is the world I see when I think about games a world where if we can imagine it we can make it happen, and help each other in a myriad of ways in the process. So to those who’ve never really considered games, my challenge to you is simple give them a go.

For a starting point, calling up a friend with a Wii lying around for some Mario Kart action or

downloading a few different phone apps is always a good start, but there’s a wealth of meaningful and wonderful titles out there.

Other than scouring steam for top selling indie games like Gone Home and Bird Story, two short, single player games that probably feel very different to the standard image of games, the website itch.io is a great place to find cheap and free games made by everyday people over the world. I am constantly blown away by the quality, art and stories people are managing to tell through the medium, with more than one bound to induce a rollercoaster of feelings as you play. Just sign up, scroll through the list till you find something that grabs your interest and take it for a spin!

As more and more people start playing games, my dream is that more and more people will come to make, share and engage with the medium in new ways. Video games are a young art form that truly is ours to shape, something we’re seeing already as incredible things are being made that can change the way we see the world already.

So, what are you waiting for?

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UOW101

by Bec Wiggins @youfoundbec

UO W 1 0 1 : S u r v i val G u i d e You made it. Take a deep breath in … and out.

The University of Wollongong is possibly the most laid back, friendliest and home to the most duck ponds per capita of any university in the world. And now you totally go here! However, it’s not quite time to relax yet.

No matter your background, you’ll find that the transition to university life can be very difficult and stressful.

Luckily for you, you’re not alone and you have the opportunity to learn from the experiences of others. So, here it is; your tool to mastering UOW and an ultimate survival guide tried and tested by yours truly.

Lesson 1: Keep your friends close and the friends you actually want to see again closer Remember a couple of hours ago when you passed your friend outside the library only to realise you’d both be free at one today? Remember how you said “I have to run to class right now but I’ll text you at 1ish for lunch?” and they were all “Yeah sure! See you later!”? Well, it’s time to file your missing persons report because you’re never going to see them ever again.

Unless you’re paying through the nose for Telstra and their coveted reception, you just need to get used to the idea that a university in the shadow of a mountain isn’t going to get along with your phone company. There is ONE spot on campus that sometimes graces students with cell activity and this is directly outside the library. It’s not an easy hot spot to master and you may have to perform a sort of ritualistic dance around the quad, with outstretched arm and phone in hand, in order to beg for the generosity of the reception gods. In short, it’s very hit and miss and be prepared for the judgement of Panizzi onlookers.

I’ve always felt that the social life of UOW is one of the university’s nicest elements and connecting with friends here is a must for a happy, healthy uni experience. So you should make a bit of an effort to meet up and plan ahead. Otherwise you could always try messaging them over Facebook but this leads me to my next point.

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Lesson 2: It’s not you, it’s the servers I know, you’ve been trying to connect to the wifi since eleven and you’re tired and frustrated and upset but I promise the world is not against you! There’s no problem with your laptop so you need to stop bothering the tech support people, they can’t help you either. The truth there’s just more people on the internet than UOW can handle and there’s no quick fix for it.

Between 11 and 4:30 the internet fights a hard battle so if you have assignments you need to finish off, even if it’s just the bibliography, you need to plan out finishing them with this dip in mind because a lack of internet can quickly disrupt your best laid plans (read: my bibliography took me 2 hours).

If you’re desperate for internet and willing to make the trip you could always travel down to building 3 (the computer sciences home ground) and connect to the UOW wifi down there since more people are connected to Freedom wifi and there’s a stronger signal in building 3. The down side of this is that if you’re an arts student such as myself, you’re on enemy turf. You never really say you’re not in computer science but somehow they just know it and you know they know it. If you have a thick skin or find some sympathetic IT students and bridge the gap, this situation is fine. Otherwise, you’ll have to battle it out for a desktop computer with a sweet, sweet Ethernet connection. These can be found all throughout the library and building 14 (the one that links to the library) but you’ll be lucky if you can secure one. I guess you could always go back to playing solitaire on your laptop again.

Lesson 3: As all roads lead to Rome, all buses lead to UOW: When I first began studying at Wollongong I had many a misadventure on the bus. I still hadn’t explored the whole campus and when I got off in an area I was unfamiliar with, I thought I was stranded at the mysterious Wollongong Tafe. I was so embarrassed that I had gotten lost on the bus and supposedly ended up at this other institution that I wouldn’t even open up my campus map to check because I thought someone might see the UOW insignia on it and realise what an idiot I was. And then I found the library. I was an idiot for other reasons.

I wish I could say this only happened once. Because the number 9 bus (the only bus that goes to and from North Gong station and the one you want to catch) has two routes and I went made this mistake on both of them. One of the routes leads directly to the main bus bay out the front of uni on Northfields Avenue and one makes its way around the campus to a series of stops on what is called the Ring Road Loop (goes past building 3 computer science, building 41 science, building 25 creative arts, Hope Theatre) until it too also ends up at the main bus bay. But really, anything you’re catching from North Gong station is going to end up at uni so there’s no need to worry about that.

The other buses that run in and out of uni (apart from the Campbeltown bus which I have no knowledge or understanding of) are the free green buses that travel all around Wollongong. FOR FREE!!! There’s a 55A and a 55C, and basically all you really need to be aware of is that A stands for anti-clockwise and heads towards Wollongong hospital and C stands for clockwise which heads to Fairy Meadow (note: disappointingly not as magical as it sounds).

Lesson 4: General advice flash-round Save money everywhere, even if it’s just by packing your own lunch. Prepare for the possibility that there is no ebook version of that one amazing book you need and take solace in the fact that when you do go to the library to get a physical copy, you will look and feel like Hermione Granger. You’re not a teenager with a teenager’s metabolism anymore; you can’t eat terribly without consequence so learn to love your veggies. Uni is great and parties are fun but you didn’t come to UOW to sport a hangover every morning; you came to learn, so that comes first.

But most of all…

Lesson 5: Relax You have a lecture on in five minutes and you just woke up in your bathtub covered in the remains of your midnight Maccas feast with no time to pack your own lunch. Oh and also there’s no ebook version of the main source you’ve cited in that essay due at 4.

Dude, you broke like all my rules.

Once again, take a deep breath in … and out.

My all-time favourite quote originates from the works of Persian poets. It’s “and in time, this too shall pass.” Good or bad, things always do. Somehow things just always seem to work out. There are always professors willing to cut you some slack and always solutions to your problems. If you need some extra support counselling services are available 5 days a week through the uni between 9am-5pm and you can make a booking by calling 02 4221 3225.

Just remember, this is not the be all and end all of your entire existence, as much as that one power tripping lecturer would like you to believe. Always keep focusing on the positives and go ahead and enjoy yourself! You earned it.

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CONTRIBUTOR PROFILE

by Gemma Mollenhuaer @GemmaMolle07

JAKE CUPITT Can you give us an overview of who you are and what you’re all about?

Jake Cupitt, Wollongong.

22,

residence:

I’m into blues music and I play the blues on guitar. Favourite musicians and influences include Jack White from The White Stripes, Jimi Hendrix and Bob Dylan. I like reading 60’s beat authors like Hunter.S. Thompson, Jack Keroac, J.D. Salinger.

Hunter.S is my all-time literary hero, he pioneered a genre of journalism called ‘gonzo’, where he would leave in all the juicy details and not worry about offending people, just telling the brutal truth for the sake of the truth. He started writing political pieces for Rolling Stone Magazine in the 70’s- my ultimate career goal in life.

What degree are you studying and what year will you graduate?

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I’m studying a Bachelor of Journalism and I’ll finish in 2016.

I’m hoping to do a second degree when I’m finished, maybe English teaching.

Do you have a plan post degree, if yes, what is it?

After uni I want to get a job anywhere in the journalistic field and develop a career, like I said before hopefully one day to write for Rolling Stone. I’m not a massive fiction writer so I don’t know if a novel is where I’d like to take my career but I do love writing in short form prose. I’ve written a few short prose poems that show off a little bit of a ‘personal’ me.

I’d also like teaching high school English if I can find a job.

Where do you see yourself in 10 years?

In 10 years I’ll be 32!! Far out that’s crazy just saying it (laughs). Well I want to have a have a good job in the journalism field or be teaching somewhere. I’m not into the whole marriage gig but I definitely want kids and a family. I just don’t feel

that in today’s society you don’t need a piece of paper to say that you want to be with someone for your whole life.

I’ve also thought about possibly starting a record store somewhere.

A place where I’d sell cool indie documentaries and awesome vinyl, CD’s, cult classic books as well as a chill place where people could come and relax and read all day if they wanted to.

What would you like to see more of in The Tert this year?

This year I’d love to see The Tert get more active in the wider Wollongong community. Make it into something that everyone talks about and reads religiously.

Do things like advertise local businesses and organise events like concerts or market days.

And would you rather fight 100 horse size ducks or 1 duck size horse?

Hmm, I’d have to say I’d rather fight 1 duck size horse, because 100 horse size ducks is actually my worst nightmare!

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#TERTFASHION

by Nat Croker @natcroker2014

ES TAT E OF M IN D

This issue we kick off a new series dedicated to all things fashion. It will feature entrepreneurs, designers, UOW street style, if you don’t see #thetertteam snapping your outfit in the next coming months its time for a wardrobe change. This issue, to fit in with our weird and wonderful theme, I interviewed an individual from the fashion industry that steers far from social norms and mainstream fashion. Instantly struck by her savvy business model, awesome personality and rad style. Whether you’re a budding entrepreneur, fashionista, you read Russh, Frankie or Vogue, spend your free time scrolling (stalking) bloggers instagram accounts, or your bank account doesn’t exist because asos.com gets you every time, keep tuned for #tertfashion.

When it comes to eccentric fashion, Sylvie Cornu is the girl to talk too. Owner/ Buyer/ Lady Bo$$ of e-boutique +ESTATEofMIND Cornu is the creative force that has witnessed and contributed to the growth of many Aussie designers and has brought many sought after international labels to the shores of Sydney.

Cornu has a flare for style that steers far away from mainstream fashion (aka she aint no #basicbitch). This style reflects straight into her e-boutiques clothing, catering for all #farshunn lovers that don’t care about brands/labels but just want to wear some cool threads. +ESTATEofMIND boutique mixes street style with high fashion to make pure awesomeness, stocking brands such as Emma Mulholland, Lazy Oaf, KTZ, Joyrich, Roberto Piqueras and much more. ESTATE of Mind offers unique brands catering for all indviduals.

With her badass attitude, rad style and inspiring work ethic, Cornu is a force to be reckoned with and one fashion entrepreneur bringing us something fresh and different every season. #languagewarning Favourite designers/labels atm?

• • • • • • •

NATTOFRANCO Henrik Vibskov Jacuesmus Nasir Mazhar Au Jour Le Jour Hood By Air MSGM

What do you look for in a brand when doing the buying for Estate Of Mind?

• • • • • •

Exclusivness Cool as fuck factor Price Availability Design Quality

Who is your style icon?

Don’t really have one to be honest... I’m into a whole load of looks/ styles/people from Michele Lamy to Peggy Gould to Julia Sarr Jamois.

When you’re not being a “lady boss” what do you like to do?

Funny enough I enjoy working. I currently work 7 days.

Everyone has one fashion trend they want to burn, whats yours?

Peplum tops & those hideous chunky sandals things.

You’re a self-described lady boss! What advice can you give to UOW budding entrapeauners?

Like Nike says- JUST FUCKING DO IT! Where/ what did you study?

I studied Fashion design at FBI Fashion College and started a business course but didn’t really finish it, I’m what you call a do’er (is that even a word?) I just do it, and learn along the way... never been good at a textbook or writing, as i’m more sure you have picked up on with the 20 million spelling mistakes and shit wording in this Q & A =) Instagram or Facebook?

Instagram all the way, fuck facebook.

Vodka or Tequila?

Why cant we just have both?

Check out +ESTATEofMIND here: estateofmind.com.au http://estateofmindboutique.blogspot.com.au @estateofmind

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27

REVIEWS

REVIEWS

by Tyler Rose @theycott

by Caitlin Morahan

B OO K RE V IE W : W E A RE ALL C O M P L E T E LY B ESI D E OURSE LV ES

F i lm RE V IE W : B IR D M A N Being awards season, the buzz mill runs hard.

Every year, there are the films that always bear the weight of outlandish praise, usually to their own detriment. This can be a disastrous thing as, in the same way some trailers may reveal the best points of a movie, high expectations lead to subsequent underwhelment. Given the fact that it was one of the last films reviewed on ABC review show At The Movies, and received a full figure endorsement from both hosts Margaret and David, “Birdman” has been put firmly in this field.

If you haven’t heard of the film, it concerns an aging mainstream film star (not unlike the actor portraying him, Michael Keaton) who is in the process of staging a play he wrote, directed and is set to star in. Whilst it sounds fairly run of the mill on paper, the film has some very noteworthy elements. For starters, it has been filmed and edited in order to intentionally appear as one long shot. Whilst this is a technique utilised in the past, its use here creates an atmosphere of forced voyeurism. As the camera pans between characters and scenes, we are made to feel as much of a part of the film as the characters are, whilst, still on the viewing end.

This is really where the whole meta aspect of the

film becomes apparent. Being centered around the construction of a stage production, one based upon a book no less, the film has a considerable great deal to say about it’s medium and of it’s propagators.

With it’s references to various real life actors, often in comparison against the fictional tragics that appear in the movie, “Birdman” has a sly sense of humour throughout it that, whilst often black in tone, is never less than playful.

However, while this may be the case, the film doesn’t really hold firm ground with regards to tone. As a comedy, it’s not really that funny, or as a drama, it’s far too knowingly self aware to gain heft. While the more fantastical elements give the film a sense of buoyancy, it doesn’t lend much to the logic of the film. Paired alongside the use of the aforely mentioned single shot technique, these merely feel like additions to a film that would otherwise be fairly good but certainly not at a standard worthy of such heaped praise. Perhaps I was too soured by the expectations that preceded “Birdman”. Despite this, however, it’s certainly entertaining; the performances are expectedly solid from the ensemble cast and the technical achievement alone is spectacular. It just felt as though the film could have pushed a little further upwards, then it would have truly soared.

7/ 10

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“In everyone’s life there are people who stay and people who go and people who are taken away against their will.”

As a child, Rosemary Cooke never stopped talking.

As a young woman, she has wrapped herself in a protective layer of silence that coats memories of a long-lost brother and sister :Lowell (who went) and Fern (who was taken away).

Rosemary stayed.

Twins Rosemary and Fern are raised together, but the summer after their fifth birthday Fern disappears, never to be seen again. Six years later, their older brother Lowell follows suit. As a young woman and college student lacking any real direction, Rosemary tentatively turns around and looks through her past for clues of the unraveling of her family. The nonlinear book starts in the middle with Rosemary’s college years, a blossoming relationship with a standin sister and insight to the fractured relationship with her parents. While at times it deals with difficult, and often political topics, Fowler’s style is endearingly light-hearted and easy to read.

I debated long and hard with myself whether I should give away page 77 in this review – it’s hard to write one without mentioning the completely unanticipated plot twist. However, I think it’s best to go into this book completely cold, therefore ensuring an unanticipated revelation and the ohhhh moment that completely changes the way you view the novel.

Fowler’s writing was sophisticated and psychologically smart. Although some parts read like a documentary, Rosemary makes for a dry and quick-witted narrator and the book has an air of ironic detachment, despite its fragmented and emotionally raw flashbacks. Using both reason and sentiment, the novel explores what it means to be human, and how far we will go for other beings.

7/ 10

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OPINION

OPINION

by Zofia Zayons @zzayons

thE i n s i d e r ’ s g u i d e t o uow’s coffee scene

At the University of Wollongong, there are more coffee shops than available parking spaces. Coffee is a basic huma right and let’s face it, UOW without coffee is just not UOW. I spent my first year of University drinking Panizzi coffee because people told me it was the best. I would stare at everyone walking around with their Panizzi cups and wonder if there was something I didn’t get, because quite frankly, that lukewarm coffee flavoured milk was rubbish. (Sorry to all of the Panizzi fans out there, I don’t think you actually like coffee... You probably just really like toasties.) To avoid drinking average coffee for a year, this is your handy guide for fitting in like a coffee local, finding your coffee crowd and not wasting precious pennies on a coffee that just isn’t your brew.

Rush/ Rush 2: Located at: Rush- Beneath building 67, next to the food court and McKinnon Lawn.

Rush 2- Beneath building 11, opposite the Duckpond Lawn and UniShop.

They’re not the speediest coffee shop on campus (Rush is faster than Rush 2), but the product is, without fail, delicious. They are busy all day every day and they have three barista’s working to make your one coffee. Rush and Rush 2 both use Toby’s Estate, which is really damn good coffee, maybe even better than Campos.

If you’re not certain on which coffee shop to start out at, I suggest here. They’re close to the Duckpond/McKinnon Lawn and close to multiple food outlets so you can grab a snack and somewhere to sit at the same time.

Hipster rating: 4/5 Birkenstocks.

Out for Lunch: Located: Opposite Student Central, beneath Building 17. Walking towards Duck Pond Lawn from the Green Bus Bus Stop, you’ll find it on your right.

For the green cup fans, Out for Lunch is your go-to. If you don’t know what I mean by “green cup”, it’s the universal sign for organic and quality coffee, Campos. You can consistently get a good coffee anywhere that sells Campos, and Out for Lunch is no exception. It’s inside location may be a deterrent for some, but it’s great for when it rains, which is pretty much all the time during Autumn Semester. Out for Lunch is also great if you don’t actually like coffee as their range of T2 teas is extensive.

This place doesn’t have a “cool” crowd and anything goes at this coffee locale.

Hipster rating: 2/5 Birkenstocks

Little Chimneys: Located: In the Courtyard of Building 14. Walking from UniBar towards URAC, go past the kangaroo sculptures and then follow the delicious scent of pastries and pie.

If you’re drinking coffee here, you most likely own some combination of the following: Timberlands, Birkenstocks, a half bun/ man bun, a crystal or a 90s choker.

And if you don’t own any of those things, it’s safe to assume you really appreciate damn good coffee. If you drink soy you definitely want to go here, Little Chimneys regularly uses Vitasoy Cafe and on good days they use Bonsoy; soy drinkers rejoice! The staff are super friendly and the baked goods make me dribble.

You should try the Veggie pie, that pie makes me want to enroll in another degree so I can eat it for three more years. The coffee is delicious and the courtyard is sunny and perfect. Do yourself a favour, go here, a lot. It’s the best coffee on campus.

Hipster rating: 5/5 Birkenstocks

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Panizzi: Located at: Beneath the library, opposite the Communications Building.

I’m just going to say it, please don’t hunt me down with flaming torches, the coffee isn’t the best.

The service isn’t the best. It’s just average coffee with better than average toasties in a very high traffic location. Great forgrabbing a snack/beverage as you race from one side of campus to the other.

Also renowned for employing model-esque staff so make sure you have your self confidence in check before you step up to the counter.

Hipster rating: 3/5 Birkenstocks The Yard: Located at: In amongst the Engineering and IT buildings, alongside the SAF fee funded handball courts.

Buried down by the engineering buildings, venturing to The Yard is only for the brave. From all reports, The Yard makes great coffee and receives lashings of morning sunshine. If you’re an Engineering student, or you’ve got a spare

twenty minutes to walk there and back, it’s a great place for a quiet brew. If you’ve taken the time to walk there, you’re probably going to be so ready for a coffee it will taste good regardless.

Hipster rating: If you even know about this place, and then make the effort to get there, it’s well worth 3/5 Birkenstocks, just for obscurity.

Sixty-Seven Dining: Located at: Building 67. On the first level, go inside the front entrance and turn left. Look for the chalkboard sign declaring that there is no Eftpos minimum.

Sixty-Seven may look like a restaurant but don’t be scared, the academics don’t bite, and your coffee will be made with the same delicious Campos beans as Out for Lunch. When the Rush line is twenty five people long, the Sixty-Seven line will only be two people long, meaning you won’t have to choose between getting your coffee hit and arriving on time to class. The Sixty-Seven patio is great for studying in the sunshine and overlooking the McKinnon

Lawn. Its location makes it a hub for Law, Creative Arts and Arts students alike; not an Engineering student in sight.

Hipster rating: 1/5 Birkenstocks.

Picasso’s: Located: Smoldering ashes beneath the Little Chimneys stand.

Rest In Peace Picasso’s. This humble little coffee stand was located where Little Chimneys now stands. Its dedicated fans claimed it had the BEST coffee on campus.

Unfortunately, that wasn’t enough to stop it from closing down, leading to the roaring success of Little Chimneys. While Picasso’s die hard fans have been boycotting Little Chimneys for the better part of last semester, it’s been reported that they’re slowly crawling back in, sometimes in disguise, succumbing to the great new replacement, yet never forgetting their true courtyard coffee roots.

Hipster rating: “I drank at Little Chimneys before Little Chimneys existed” 5/5 Birkenstocks

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DEBATE

DEBATE

by Georgia Holloway @grumpygeorgia

Alex Napier @AlexNapier93

NE W Y E A R ’ S RESO L U T IONS New Years Resolutions to me are a lot like Vegemite, religion and hip-hop music. I understand that many people out there like them and find them to be good things to have in their lives. However I just do not like them at all. Perhaps this, like my distaste for the previous three items, is just as element of my personality rather than a problem with the thing itself. Nonetheless…

than you have to?

I also feel that resolutions have become a bit of a bandwagon, where people decide they need to make a New Years Resolution because most other people have one. This I also don’t approve of. Do something because you want to do it, not because other people are doing things and you want to try and fit in with them.

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They also allow people to put things off when perhaps they shouldn’t be put off. Let’s say someone wanted to quit smoking, start exercising or begin a diet, or whatever else people tend to pledge as their resolutions. If they only need to start doing that thing on January 1st then the temptation will be there for many people to keep doing whatever it is they are doing until then. If people at some point during the year decide that they have failed in keeping their resolution, then the process provides a convenient resetting point Perhaps it’s just me and my complete and utter lack of any sentimentality when it comes to things like this, but to me January 1st just seems like an arbitrary date for when it comes to people setting their resolutions. It makes little more sense than picking July 11th or September 23rd as a date for beginning a new undertaking. Maybe the New Year can be a good time to start on a new goal, if for example it coincided with a new job, or some significant life event. But otherwise it is just a date, as simple as that.

If you ask me, I know you didn’t but I’ll say what I think anyway, if you want something done, do it now.

Carpe Diem; seize the day. No time like the present.

I know that not everything can be done immediately and sometimes a wait may be a necessary part of achieving something, but why put it off any longer

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Even if it turns out that they are successful in keeping this resolution, and I do hope people are successful in whatever they aim for, I still don’t see the need for people to wait for a certain date to start. As university students, many of us are familiar with procrastination and putting off an assignment that we know we should have started working on days or weeks ago. I don’t think many people out there would say that this is a good way to do things and I feel the same way when it comes to setting New Years Resolutions.

Not that people shouldn’t set goals for themselves, they definitely should. I just don’t see the need at all for January 1st to be the date where people start making and working towards these goals. That is why I am not personally in favour of New Years Resolutions and have not made any and don’t plan to do so. To everyone who has though, I wish you success.

what ’ s th e point?

Every New Year’s Eve I get a little stressed. Not about my plans for the night, but mainly about my plans for the next year. You see, I’m a strong believer in New Year’s Resolutions. But let me just say, that doesn’t mean I put off changes to my life until January 1st.

New Year’s Eve is a time for me to look back on what I’ve achieved in the last 12 months, and decide how I want to progress into the New Year. It’s not because I’m lazy and I put things off until the next year. There have been plenty of years where I’ve started a new goal half way through. However, I find that it helps to have that looming new year to spark one of (...okay I do it all the time) those weird conversations in my head, when I ask myself what I want to do next.

everyone else is doing it. But really, I like January 1st because it’s a nice number, I can’t do random dates, or uneven numbers, it has to be well rounded – okay? Also why are we always trying to argue that there’s no meaning to it? January 1st is a big deal, it means something, a whole 365 days have passed!

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I’ve found that if I don’t have set goals or decisions at the beginning of the year, I tend to feel lost by the time it’s winter. For example, in 2013 I had lots of goals, I mainly wanted to lose weight and travel. I left to go backpacking around Europe in August, I was also 12 kilograms lighter. However 2014 wasn’t so successful. I wanted to focus on uni work, which I did, but this was a vague goal and as a result I felt pretty vague in 2014.

Maybe it’s just me and my slightly neurotic ways, but I need January 1st, I need the clean slate of the New Year, to reflect. It doesn’t make sense to me to do this on July 24th. Maybe I like January 1st because

So even though I didn’t think I killed it in 2014, on December 31st I still had that weird conversation with myself. It takes time to achieve things, and a review after 12 months is pretty logical to me. Sure, I was proud of what I achieved, going back to study after a year off was hard. Though, I still felt like I hadn’t grown much as a person; I felt stuck. By setting my 2015 goals, I’ve got a new direction, a fresh start, to challenge myself for another 365 days.

I set New Year’s Resolutions for myself, not because I want to join the bandwagon. This year I have a bunch of goals, but I mainly want to beat my addiction to artificial sugar, and start building up a portfolio of my work for graduation. So far, so good, I’ve started a new job which will be great for my portfolio, and I was sugar free until my birthday on January 19th. I can’t lie to you guys- I was sugar free until the 18th, I had some m&m’s while battling a near life ending hangover- please don’t judge me.

Not that people shouldn’t set goals for themselves, they definitely should. I just don’t see the need at all for January 1st to be the date where people start making and working towards these goals. That is why I am not personally in favour of New Years Resolutions and have not made any and don’t plan to do so. To everyone who has though, I wish you success.

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OPINION

OPINION

by Bec Wiggins @youfoundbec

by Zoe Simmons

T o th e b e at o f my o w n d r u m They marched through the city streets, easily differentiated from the other pedestrians. They sported chokers and ankle high boots and immaculately trimmed beards and all manner of fancy hats. They darted throughout foot traffic, all headed in the one direction; the direction of a sort of beating noise. I guess you could say it was like a kind of drumming? The beating of a drum? Yeah, it was definitely Beat the Drum.

And so it was that on the 16th of January I found myself attending Triple J’s 40th anniversary celebratory concert in The Domain, Sydney (permission to be jealous now).

Music permeated the streets all the way to the edge of Hyde Park (probably because we were running late, as always) and its murmur sent tremors through the crowd so that the general pace of everyone steadily quickened. Reaching the gates and filtering through, patrons were met with a simple but effective design, with one main stage laid out along the scrolling hills of the main park and surrounded by a horseshoe of food and, of course, beverage outlets. By the time I made it in, the concert was well underway with Ball Park Music kicking it off, just one big name in the amazing lineup. Throughout the short but sweet day, I was graced with a combination of full and mini sets from some of my favourites including Vance Joy, Goyte, The Preatures, You Am I, Cat Empire, Illy, Sarah Blasko, The Presets and The Hiltop Hoods.

Not to mention all the other bands I’d probably never heard of.

Triple J packed as much into the short time and one stage that they could. And good god was it jam packed! The mosh was the perfect combination of chilled out and happy without being subdued and hyped without being violent. Instead, the crowd just seemed to bounce off each other’s energy with all manner of dance moves (I personally sported a

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fabulous rendition of the sprinkler).

High points for the evening were definitely the amazing crossovers and covers that featured throughout the concert, giving the audience a taste of the unusual and unexpected. The peaks of this for me included Ball Park Music’s cover of the Hoodoo Gurus classic Like Wow – Wipeout, featuring an actual member of the Hoodoo Gurus, Dave Faulkner and The Preatures cover of Boys in Town with Divinyls guitarist Mark McEntee.

As afternoon hit dusk, the chilled tunes and odd, smokey haze that began rising from the crowd since Goyte’s Heart’s a Mess, gave way to a more party vibe.

Stage lights flashed with a new, multi-coloured intensity and the mood only escalated; proving the Barney Stinson theory that you don’t need any falls for a good mix in music, it should just be all rise!

The Presets saw me on my friend’s shoulders, literally screaming (as a short person, I wasn’t prepared for her average height lifestyle) but calming down enough to belt out My People. By the end of the night, The Hilltop Hoods brought me all the way back to my 11 year old love affair with Nose Bleed Section, ending a perfect day on a perfect note.

Stumbling away from the show, it was clear that every attendee’s spirits were high as folks shared cigarettes and laughs from the bathroom queue all the way to Town Hall station. Honestly, after a long spell of purely rock and metal concerts, Beat the Drum was the perfect combination of everything for me and really encapsulated the aus-centric, something-foreveryone vibe of Triple J in one amazing package.

So, happy 40 years, Triple J and thanks for the bitchin’ party.

W hat D o e s th e squirrel s ay ?

I’ve decided that being a university student isn’t all that dissimilar to being a squirrel—in my experiences anyway. Before you judge me and think “wow, what a weirdo! What the hell? Why am I reading this?” bear with me. I have a point to this, I promise.

I compare being a student to a squirrel based on my spending habits. With an accountant for a mum, the value of money has been instilled in me pretty much since I could talk. As a result, I am a chronic saver. In fact, I never spend money. I hate spending money; it causes me physical discomfort. When I want to, I just think “what could this money be better spent on? Do I need it? Do I love it?”

This is until, however, I see something on sale.

Not too long ago, I accidently bought $123 worth of alcohol. This is not—I repeat—this is not because I have a drinking problem. The vodka was on special and it was good vodka. If there’s one thing I can’t stand it’s cheap alcohol; younger memories of goon still haunt me. So when I saw that Smirnoff Vodka had a major special, it was an opportunity I simply could not pass up. The only problem is that I bought more than one. And then some. Whoops.

And it’s not like I didn’t already have alcohol at home; I pretty much have an entire bar. So why did I spend so much? I hoard. It was on special. I saw the savings and couldn’t resist.

This is what lead me to believe that university life is akin to being a squirrel—a squirrel with an eye for bargains. As your typical poor uni student, I stock my liquor cabinets, fridge and cupboards as if I were preparing for hibernation.

I do this with frozen pizzas, breakfast biscuits— anything I can freeze. I even do this with clothes. If I love it (and if it is on special), I am highly likely to buy more than one.

I have a serious saving/spending problem. Although, being a bargain splurger means I pretty much don’t have to buy anything for six months because I probably already have twenty in the cupboard or freezer.

It’s ridiculous, because when I’m not spending, I live off jars of peanut butter and cans of corn—and I think that’s perfectly acceptable. What can I say? #unilife.

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January the 16th was a night to celebrate new things. For Basil’s Kite (BK) it was the launch of their 2nd EP and for me, it was a night to lose my RAD bar virginity. From the outside, one could peer into the small welcoming bar, clad in band stickers and texta-drawn artworks, but once in it was a whole different story. Through a pair of red curtains lay a blank canvas of space, perfect for holding the launch of Celestial Shitshow, BK’s new concert. And boy did it live up to its name.

Soon enough the white walls boasted projections of falling chainsaws and fruit platters jolting on repeat as local supporting act Midnight Karaoke sampled an array of ambient sounds that one could imagine as the soundtrack to the world’s trippiest sci-fi film.

Next on the support-list was Milkk, who microwaved the room by threading swelling layers of electric guitar loops with a punching drum-kit. The blank canvas had now had a few washes of engrossing music and was ready for the band of the night to splatter themselves all over it.

After saxophonist Hodge introduced the band in his fitting ultra-tight gold attire, everyone began to feel that familiar sense of abandonment that is intrinsic to any live show. I was refreshed by the way BK utilizes vocals not as a lead, but rather an ingredient in a brew of sax, guitars, drums and bass. Not to mention they’re also a math rock band that prides themselves on harnessing head-on collisions between jazz and hard core. BK swung from jutting jazz beats flavoured

by Hodge’s smooth sax to the drummer Reagan beating his kit senseless under the swelling distorted electrics. As guitarist Jack aptly put it, BK has taken “both extremes and put party hats on them”. And that is exactly what happened, all the while their predominant jazz funk was built into a dissonant hard-core frenzy; a tactful set-list that rocketed the gig into the night.

Jack’s party hat analogy made a lot of sense after

Celestial Shitshow, for BK is more than willing to throw random bouts of humour into their music in the name of fun. We heard snippets of a Basil’s Kiteian Hollaback Girl as well as Let it Go in their song Kony 2012. Stock footage of innocuous grazing bunnies rolled out from the projector as bassist Jacob screamed the lyrics to Yew!. Not to mention the visual cameos of animal sock puppets and creepy dolls that even got the band laughing mid-song.

The footage was certainly a nice touch to the gig, taking the strong music video culture into a simple yet effective live format.

The crowd graduated from standers to dancers giving everyone who wanted to a chance to move (and who could blame them?). Even when it did head down death-pit lane the band handled the impact brilliantly. As one audience member worried about his swollen eye (when I said chance to move I meant it) Jack easily asked everyone to sit crosslegged with him. In a moment, the crowd became kids in anticipation of a hard-core, drum-ruled story time. However, it wasn’t long before Jack started to have a friendly romp with the pushers and shovers.

I think only such a thing was possible because of the mutual respect between the crowd and BK. Having everyone on the same wooden floorboards was conducive to BK’s ability to make an audience feel like they have been invited into their private crazy jam.

They didn’t just start the party, they lived it with us.

Whether you were on the fairy-lit stairs or the dance floor, all in the room felt a unique comradery. People weren’t shy of stroking Jack’s face or worshipping Hodge’s solos. Reagan got to crowd surf despite the conclusion of the set. As I left with my complementary EP, recorded by the talented guitarist Jono himself, I felt a satisfying ear ringing from my first night at RAD bar. And one of many BK gigs.

Before the launch of Celestial Shitshow I got the opportunity to talk with the guitarists of the band: Jack Tickner and Jonothon Tooke.

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BAND INTERVIEW Has BK changed much over the years?

JA: We used to be an emo band, that’s where the name comes from. Basil’s Kite’s by a band called Capt’n Jazz, a mid-west emo band. Emo is a bit of a misfit term though now.

JO: Yeah, it’s an old school 90’s definition of emo: alternative punk music that’s really cool and expressive. The term kinda got co-opted to Simple Plan and My Chemical Romance. Great band, but bad term.

You are quite experimental with your atypical rhythms and progressive melody hooks, but what exactly is it that draws you to that?

JO: The thing for me is that I can listen to so much music and get so fucking bored. Don’t get me wrong, there are many examples of great music. But there are certain genres, which are so by the numbers.

It’s just like, okay cool, you’re doing that thing that America was doing five years ago. But even if they’re successful at doing it I would never want to be in that band, because it is so fundamentally boring to me. It has to be interesting.

How do you guys psych yourselves up for a performance?

JA: We feed off each other. Sometimes you can go up onstage and be in a bad mood but it just trickles away. There’s no way we can play our music and not be somewhat excited. Trying to be sad while doing a gig is kinda like being tickled while you’re really mad. You’re like “Doonnnt-ah-okay” and then you start laughing.

As the producer, Jono, how would you describe Celestial Shitshow?

JO: For me, I think about it as like the craziness that we had in the first EP but a little bit tighter. It’s more

of a complete solid thing and the sax is in tune this time.

JA: laughs In this one we’ve done lots of layers of sax and orchestration.

JO: So much orchestration. It took a day, an entire day to record the guitar parts. At a show you can express your excited-ness and your craziness with how you perform. You need to have a way of expressing that in recording and giving people the impression that these guys are a bit psycho.

How do you guys go about songwriting?

JA: Sometimes the more complicated the t une is Jono and I will spend, no joke, like 4 hours playing unplugged electric guitars. It’s an inch by inch process where we write a certain part and are like “cool, what comes next?”

JO: And then other times we will be in a room with everyone and all the instruments there and it will just happen. There’s no real middle ground it’s either completely organic with the band in the room or composed to the finest piece.

In paying tribute to this issue, what is the most wonderfully weird gig that BK has done?

JA: There was this one time we played a house party, at this massive mansion in Austinmer. It was a twohour cross band gig with Thomas Covenant. And we got so wasted, to the point where people in the band ended up peeing on each other.

So we all decided to swim in the expensive mansion pool to wash it off, where one of the guys from Covenant got excited and accidentally broke a goon bag in the pool and then started taking his clothes off.

So naturally everyone got naked and walked back to the house to have a shower together. It wasn’t really that weird I guess, only in hindsight when we remembered we were naked and didn’t really know anyone at the party.

“Andromedian Pulse” Roshan Gurmeet Signh

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WEL COME TO W O L L ON G ON G Amy Fairall @AmyEloiseF

Resting between the barrelling waves of the Pacific Ocean and the jagged descent of the Illawarra escarpment, lays the region of Wollongong. A small city in comparison to its coastline neighbour Sydney, but what it lacks in size it makes up for in life. Wollongong is the home to a university, TAFE and dozens of primary and secondary schools. These institutions, alongside a relaxed coastal lifestyle, have led to a great community of learners and educators.

Second year university student, Errin Claypole, moved from her small home town of Blayney last year to study by the beach, “I chose to study in Wollongong because it is far enough from home to be independent but also close enough to visit.

Blayney is only 4 hours away” says Claypole.

Claypole commends Wollongong on many features that other student based towns and cities don’t have readily available, “I think Wollongong has the essentials for university students that other towns fail to provide. Such as the free shuttle bus, Wollongong night life, cheap food and drinks specials and the beach,” says Claypole.

The physical landscape of the city is a major attraction for many young people. George Takacs is a member for the local Wollongong council and a lecturer at the university. He says that the council is trying to make people realise the extent of the natural facilities available throughout the area. “We’ve got 17 patrolled beaches in Wollongong. We’ve also got an escarpment that’s very attractive for sports and recreation ... A lot of people aren’t aware that these things exist, especially in the quantities that they do,” says Takacs.

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The geographical location of Wollongong is another one of its many advantages for students. Being a city itself, there will always be job opportunities for graduates. Yet its close proximity to the expansive city of Sydney opens many more doors for students in terms of internships and future job prospects.

However, compared to its northerly neighbour, the living costs in Wollongong are much more achievable for students living on a limited budget. Students living within walking distance of the University of Sydney are paying up to $240 a week in rent alone.

Whereas students living in close proximity to the University of Wollongong and Illawarra Tafe pay on average $140 a week. Regardless, even for students who don’t live in the area, it is still seen as an ideal place to study.

Yet, most likely the biggest attraction for young people, especially those coming from country towns, is the size of the city. “It’s large enough to have a wide variety of things happening in there. It’s not so big you feel like you’re in a really busy city...It’s a bit more like home,” says Takacs. This is especially true in terms of the city’s night life. In previous years, Wollongong night life was somewhat of a turbulent scene. Now - the inner city now boasts not only several night clubs, but also many music venues and bars that have created a different feel throughout the city. Students now have the choice of attending a club for dance music, or a quiet bar for a few drinks and to watch a live band. The variety of nightlife activities has increased and been tailored to what students are interested in. This change is partly thanks to the local council, who are adamant on keeping students occupied and happy. “We set up a live music task force, to see what we can do to make it easier for, particularly bands playing original music, to play at venues around the city,” says Takacs.

Claypole is thoroughly enjoying her time studying in Wollongong and would recommend the city to other people from country towns. “Being from a small town and moving here has opened my eyes up to many things. I encourage anyone who is from the country to move to Wollongong or a larger city to experience new things,” says Claypole.

There are few other towns and cities that are able to boast all of the attractive aspects that Wollongong offers its residents. The city is a hidden gem especially for students on a budget. It has something to offer for people of all ages, backgrounds and interests. All of which are easily accessible and often uncrowded.

There is little to dislike about the area. Except possibly its lack of parking.

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A L I T T L E D E AT H ? OR A N OR G A S M ?

Jake Cupitt @jakecupitt

What do you enjoy most about the porn you watch?

Well I believe there are two schools of people: those who enjoy the reality aspect of it, and those that enjoy the fantasy aspect of it. Now I’m not judging anyone for what rocks his or her boat, but I think there’s an argument to be made for reality.

In 2003 Richard Lawrence and Lauren Olney started a multimedia project called The Beautiful Agony.

They’re philosophy suggests that what we are most attracted to in sex and in porn is the achievement of a real orgasm. Girls feel satisfied, guys feel triumphant everyone is happy. This leads me to the purpose of The Beautiful Agony project. This project shows short films of the faces of genuine ordinary people having genuine extraordinary orgasms.

In 2003 the group of Aussies (yes that’s right, Aussies have some great ideas!) collaborated on a multimedia project to test a hypothesis, “that eroticism in human imagery rests not in naked flesh and sexual illustration, but engagement with the face.” To test this hypothesis they experimented with filming the faces of people during a genuine orgasm. “We wondered whether film of a genuine,

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unscripted, natural orgasm - showing only the face could succeed where the most visceral mainstream pornography fails, and that is, to actually turn us on,” explained Olney.

This brings me back to my point about reality or fantasy. Like I said before everyone is different, so we can’t assume that what is a turn on for one person is a turn on for another. However, I think it’s prudent to ask the question; What turns you on? Reality? Or fantasy?

When you catch someone at possibly their most vulnerable point – pre or post orgasm – they tend to open up and share more than usual. The project that originally set out to compare the scripted porn industry to the real deal ended up becoming a platform for participants to confess their deepest emotions and desires. Before the DIY porn stars get down to the nitty-gritty they are asked to answer some deep questions about who they are sexually and reveal details that normally would only be known to a loved one.

Without a doubt this sharing will only lead to a greater understanding of peoples’ nuanced feelings and desires. If partners filmed themselves answering personal, probing questions and let the world in on what they truly wanted from a lover, wouldn’t you give anything to know that information? I know I would. It would only serve to make you a better partner, able to fulfill all their sexual desires. And when it’s all said and done, what is the main goal of the gig if not to make your partner happy?

The name Beautiful Agony refers to the almost unbearable tension that comes just before the serene comfort of the climax. The project is also known as “Facettes de La Petite Mort”, in English, “facets of the little death”, quite fitting really considering la petite mort is a French euphemism for an orgasm.

You might ask, “but what makes The Beautiful Agony any different from other porn sites?” Well the main difference is the participant control. Submitters have all the power of what they show and what they don’t show, the angle of the camera, the perspective to the viewer, dressed or undressed. It really is the most personal form of expression. It’s like the submitters are saying, “look at me, here I am, this is how I do

this and I’m proud to show it.”

With over 3000 submitters and a global audience it’s clear that Beautiful Agony is making some major change. They’re creating a trend that promotes healthy expression, moving away from an industry that looks at the dollars and cents as opposed to the bottom line: a genuine orgasm. And in a time where children and teens are growing up exposed to sexualised content left right and centre, boys and girls are learning bad habits and unrealistic expectations from the porn industry. The Beautiful Agony can teach younger generations that everybody is unique and that what it really means to have a sexual relationship with someone doesn’t mean doing your best impression of Buck Naked (for the Seinfeld enthusiasts among you) Whether you’re double clicking the mouse or engaging in some hand to gland combat I recommend that you check out the project’s Facebook page or website. After all curiosity killed the cat, but satisfaction brought it back. So satisfy your curiosity.

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UO W OU T OF SESSION : T H E G OO D , THE BAD AND THE D U C K LY

Euan Malcom @euanmalcolm18

C A M P US L I V IN G The sociability, the versatility, those hung-over days spent at the beach and the convenience of waking up ten minutes before your morning lectures. These are just a few advantages of campus life at UOW. I grew up in Sydney’s north, close to one of Sydney’s biggest universities and another short train ride from two more in the city. I received a few puzzled looks when I told my friends and family I was moving down the coast to live on campus.

With the amount of options and pathways available, deciding which university to attend is a tough task in itself. We have been flooded with an overload of numbers, open days, brochures, handbooks and stationery, all competing for our, and our parent’s, attention. This decision becomes particularly difficult when it means we have to move out of home.

Whilst campus living is more common for rural students, it remains overlooked by us city kids.To be completely fair, UOW wasn’t my first preference. But as the HSC came to a close, the prospect of living away from home was becoming increasingly more appealing. However, after one incredible year of UOW campus living,

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Georgia Holloway @grumpygeoria it’s hard to imagine university any other way. Here at UOW, we have a range of residences to suit everyone. Whichever campus you choose or have already chosen, you can be guaranteed to live in a community with people from all walks of life. Whilst I won’t harbor any illusions about college stereotypes, particularly those of Campus East, it is the people that surround you that make campus living full of highs.

It’s these people that become like a second family and the memories you make at UOW will last you a lifetime. Whether it’s readily having someone to talk to, study with or get loose with on Wednesday and Thursday nights, the people you meet on campus will remain friends long after graduation. If you’re not the type to party in high school, here’s your chance. Whilst O-Week will hit you hard, the “freshman flu” will hit even harder.

To put it short, campus living at UOW is adaptable enough to make it your own. Put aside the grubby shared living spaces, two minute noodles and the copious amounts of cask wine: you’ll be rewarded with the social experience

of a life time and you’ll never want to leave, even if you were unfortunate enough to be put into slums.

My advice: Say hello to your neighbours: Door knocking is a great way to branch out to the people living at your doorstep, especially if you live in a unit with no shared spaces.

Establish a routine: There are many distractions that come with living at uni so it is important to establish a healthy study, social and exercise routine to help you achieve the grades you want without compromising your social life.

Get to know yours residential advisors: By having a good relationship with your RA, it becomes easier to discuss any issues that may arise.

Earplugs: Campus can be a noisy place and a decent pair of earplugs won’t go to waste.

Embrace it to the best you can: There’s a reason people say these years are the best of your life.

When exams end most uni students discard the textbooks for togs and hit the beach. Uni is over, summer is nearing, and sweet freedom has arrived! Yet there are those who return to lecture halls after just two weeks; the infamous summer session (cue internal groaning).

Most people think the only ones crazy enough to take on twice the amount of work in half the time, (summer session runs for just 7 weeks as opposed to 14) are those who have failed before, but this isn’t necessarily true. There are those wanting to speed up their degree, some are approaching graduation and catching up on credit points, and there’s international students eager to get acquainted with UOW. Okay maybe some of those international students are a bit crazy…

I’m not crazy, maybe just a little masochistic. I begrudgingly enrolled in a summer session when I found out my degree has a compulsory statistics subject. At first it feels like you’ve shot yourself in the foot… but it gets better… sort of… you can decide for yourself.

These are the 10 lessons I’ve learnt during summer session: 1. Shoes are optional, thongs essential Footwear stigmas dissolve in the December humidity, so wear what feels right. No judgement here.

2. Coffee lines decrease dramatically There’s no 20 minute wait for your cappuccino during summer session. 10 minute lecture break? You do have time for that!

3. The gong shuttle bus is no longer a crowded sweat vessel You can actually sit down. On. An. Actual. Seat. Plus your personal “bubble” remains uninvaded.

4. You will appreciate the small things Like all the dedicated staff who sweat it out doing maintenance and repair works, thanks guys. Or you’re friends since they’re all down the beach and you have no one to talk to in study breaks.

5. Waking up will get hard You’ve got a 9.30am lecture and it’s already 25 degrees outside? I feel your pain but at least you’ll get a parking spot.

6. Your holidays aren’t actually holidays ‘Tis the season to be- oh wait, I have a midterm on January 5th. Better rethink your summer social calendar. Summer session be like #soznotsoz.

7. You will have sad moments…

Most likely by the time midterms roll round. Moments of doubt and frustration are inevitable. Breathe… it’s only 7 weeks.

8. …and your friends won’t understand “It’s just summer session”. Thanks buddy, would you like to sit my exams for me? Uh huh, Uh huh yep, so please kindly shut up and let me wallow in self-pity.

9. Everyone is unnaturally chill Seriously, everyone is abnormally patient. Even the ducks are more docile; you can even eat lunch in peace.

10. The hard work will pay off Hopefully once it’s all over you can look back with relief, another subject bites the dust.

So if you’re thinking of enrolling in a summer session, it’s a bit like yo-yo dieting, sometimes good, but more often bad. Take my lessons as warning; if you’re prepared for the worst, it probably won’t be that bad.

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THE W O L L ON G ON G W A RRIORS QUI D D I T C H TEAM Teisha Cloos

Word bank for the Muggles Muggles – Used to describe non-magic folk I solemnly swear I’m up to no good – Used to open a magical map in Harry Potter Accio- A spell which reveals things or brings things forth Quaffle- A ball used in Qudditch that you hold Bludger – Usually a flying ball that hits you, but is the ball used to hit players Snitch- the golden ball that wins you the game Quafl cup – Qudditch tornament Triwizard tournament- A tournament that brings all the teams together competing for the big prize AKA the cup Mischief managed- The words used to close the map

Are you a sports enthusiast who has only ever dreamt of running around a field with a broomstick in-between your legs while people are running around throwing balls at you? Perhaps you have dreamt about chasing a person who has a tennis ball dangling from their pants and all you have to do is catch them in order win the game? Well look no further! I have found the game for you and it has the perks of combing both the broom and the tennis ball.

The University of Wollongong is home to the mighty Wollongong Warriors, Wollongong’s very own Qudditch team.

Starting to sound familiar? Just in case you have had a mind blank or been out of the loop for the past twelve years, Qudditch is the game played in Harry Potter.

It is played very much the same as I have explained but with actual flying and a little golden ball instead of the tennis ball.

The Australian Qudditch Association President, Morgan Legg, explained how the game is played, including: the rules, the benefits of playing Qudditch and the perks of being a part of the Warriors.

I solemnly swear I’m up to no good….

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Accio Description “Each team has seven players who are distinguished by the coloured headbands they wear. The three chasers (white headbands) score goals through the other team’s hoops with the quaffle for 10 points per goal. The keeper (green headbands) defends their team’s hoops. Each team’s two beaters (black headbands) use bludgers to ‘knock out’ the opposing team. Knocked out players must run back and touch their team’s hoops to resume play. The seeker (yellow headbands) must catch the snitch, which is a tag attached to the waistband of the snitch runner.

Catching the snitch ends the game and is worth 30 points. “ Accio Rules “As a co-ed sport, there is a gender rule requiring there to be no more than five players of one gender on the field at any time. Qudditch is also a full contact sport, though play must be one-armed, safe and only with a player that is in possession (or attempted to gain possession) of a ball. Players must have their broom between their legs at all times. “ Accio benefits “Qudditch is a fantastic way to have fun, get fit and meet new people. We promote regular exercise and well being as part of our training. Qudditch is a really unique sport that allows you to gain lots of new skills or put skills to use that you may have learnt through other sports. It’s dynamic nature also makes it a really fun game to play. The Qudditch community is one of the most welcoming and supportive communities

that I have ever been apart of and you are guaranteed to make friends that you will keep for life! “ Accio perks “The Wollongong warriors have seen the very beginning of Qudditch in Australia with the first QUAFL cup in 2011. The Warriors have held a place in the top five teams in Australia at various periods and have rarely dropped below the top ten. Various members of the team have had the chance to travel all over the country.

We have played host to two Triwizard Tournaments, and Qudditch Camp 2014.” You don’t have to be a Harry potter fan to know how fun and competitive Qudditch can be just ask Morgan, for those of you who are thinking about joining “do it! Without a doubt! Come along to trainings each week, play a tournament or two, come along to trivia at the Brewery on Wednesdays, do a fun run with us! I promise you will get hooked.” Says Morgan.

Just remember if you want to join a group to meet friends, get fit, have fun or just want to play a game, which has only ever been played in a world of magic, then join the Wollongong Warriors. “ No matter who you are, Qudditch is a wonderful sport and a wonderful group of people play it, just do it”.

Mischief Managed.

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S A FE S PA C ES Elodie May @elodiemay

In a corridor just off the entrance of Building 19, there is a haven. Appropriately unobtrusive doors are littered with hand-written notes and pictures, in a passageway that many use unthinkingly, to take the stairs to class or to access the WUSA free breakfast.

But inside, it’s beautiful, even when it’s strewn with cold coffee cups or displaced cushions. Even when you’re not alone in there it is still an escape, because it is your haven as much as it is theirs; because this is a place for everybody who needs it.

This is the Wom*n’s Space. It is usually cool, with the shades drawn, and comfortable. You can slump into old couches, read feminist affirmations scribbled in chalk, peruse zines, eat lunch, and so much more.

It is my “Room Of Requirement”, and I’m sharing it with you.

The Wom*n’s Space is autonomous. This means, according to the Feminist Society President, Jessie Hunt, it’s open to anyone with a lived experience as a wom*n. So we welcome trans men and wom*n alike, hence the asterisk.

The autonomy of the space is an important feminist notion to understand and respect. It isn’t sexism to have spaces where wom*n can take a breather

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from the patriarchy. Can I just repeat that? It isn’t sexism. The politics of space, and the gender inequalities within the university can make a wom*n’s educational experience feel threatening, patronizing and exhausting. I know it from the way I am catcalled on Northfields Avenue, or the way my male lecturers tell me to repeat myself in my “big girl voice”.

Having a safe space for wom*n is not exclusive to UOW; in fact they were developed and popularized in the 1960s and 70s by the same feminists who fought to have the Gender Studies major in the Arts Degree.

Despite losing that fight – when the Dean removed the major in 2013– at least there’s still a place with free pads and tampons in our Arts building! Plus a clothes swap to share your unwanted threads for those who need them.

But before using the space, you need to check your privilege at the door, as bigotry and oppressive views are not tolerated. Safe Spaces are about support, and making others who use the space feel safe and welcome. They aren’t about probing questions or heated debate, because this could make other users feel uncomfortable or afraid. Having to justify my feminism or my feelings in the Wom*n’s Space would make it unsafe.

That being said, the space is littered with educational resources about regional and global feminist initiatives, as well as books and hand-made zines with wom*n-identifying authors.

The same ethos applies to the room across the hall. The Queer Space, a fabulously decorated room maintained by Queer Alliance members, has a ten-page document called a Safer Spaces Policy to ensure the emotional and physical safety of its occupants.

Queer Alliance Treasurer Jasmin Wilcox is passionate about maintaining the space. She can paint pink unicorns with glitter and expound on heteronormativity at the same time. Ms. Wilcox says “The space is important as it provides a place where queer students can be themselves without fear…. “ “where people can relax and not worry about encountering queerphobia ,or at the very least know that if someone does discriminate against them based on their identity something will be done about it quickly.” The Queer Space is an autonomous space for queer-identifying students, but they will allow cisgender heterosexual students to enter, given the

consent of each occupant at the time.

Safe spaces are precious resources. Sometimes they are used for meetings, and we oddballs can get together to challenge the status quo. Other times, they literally represent the safest place on campus, free from prying eyes or probing questions. It’s a place to take a break. Since women experience mental health issues like anxiety, depression, and PTSD at a higher rate than men, it is important that there are places where they can access support.

Another worrying statistic is that same-sex attracted wom*n are twice as likely to experience depression as heterosexual wom*n. Queer youth still experience “ongoing harassment and violence”, according to the National LGBTI Health Alliance.

Fortunately, Student Advocacy Officer Siobhan “Shev” Christian’s office is wedged between the two Spaces, and she is well versed in dealing with grievances and hardships in a confidential manner.

These three rooms, tucked away, offer a wealth of support that is predominately used by members of FemSoc and the Queer Collective. But I extend my hand to you, students new or old. Your room of requirement is waiting for you, on the ground floor of Building 19.

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D U M M IES G UI D E T O S H A RE H OUSE L I V IN G Kurtis Hughes @KurtisLogan

There comes a time in everybody’s life where one must get off their mother’s lounge, relinquish all accompanying luxuries, and venture off in to the big, wide world. Yet for some, that day comes sooner rather than later.

University is a time of learning, self-development and the ever-daunting prospect of living with people you have never met.

Whether it be for economic, geographic or sheer spontaneous reasons, we must all eventually face the shocking reality that is sharehouse survival.

Interacting and sharing space with individuals whom you barely know can be a terrifying and overwhelming experience. But it can also be the best thing you could have ever done with your life.

In order to ensure that you are not counted among those featured in the circulating roommate horror stories, I have devised a sort of ‘Dummies Guide to Share House Living’: the ‘what to do’ and ‘what not to do’ if you don’t plan on being added to your roommates’ blacklists.

Bathroom Etiquette.

This is a very important matter because many consider the bathroom to be the heart of any household. It’s where we spend the majority of the morning, find solace in the evenings as well as being a place for us to take care of our business.

Now, just imagine that at the end of a hard day of university work, you venture home finding com-

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fort in the thought that a relaxing shower awaits you. However, upon entry to the bathroom you nearly trip over your roommate’s straightener which has been haphazardly strewn across the floor.

Wouldn’t be nice now would it?

So, with that being said, it is of paramount importance that you remember to keep your things tidy and in one place in order to avoid the wrath of those who deem the bathroom their kingdom and the toilet their throne.

Even keeping a toiletry bag filled with your essentials can help confine your mess and provide a sense of security over your belongings.

Oh, and for the love of god, flush the toilet.

Kitchen Madness.

The kitchen is easily the most frequented part of the house, which is why it is usually the hardest to maintain. However, don’t use that as an excuse to get lazy on the chores.

Always clean up after yourself. As university students, we no longer have the assurance that the dishes will magically take care of themselves, or that our clothes will miraculously appear washed and folded on the end of our bed.

(Those were the days…)

There is nothing worse than going into the kitchen and finding dirty dishes stacked sky high in the sink, because not only is it a hassle to wash but you end up having to use a mug and fork for those mid-afternoon cereal cravings.

Additionally, you know the saying ‘sharing is caring’?

Yeah, that rule certainly does not apply in a share house. Unless of course all roommates have mutually agreed upon a shared grocery bill, I am 99% sure that it will not turn out well for you if you think your roommates groceries are an all-you-can-eat buffet.

Bills. Bills. Bills.

To live out of home means that we all have to come to terms with the inevitability of paying bills and rent. Yes, that means ‘pay-day’ is never as exciting as it once was.

Before you even set foot in your new place, make sure that you have established the payment arrangements of the household. By that I mean who has the responsibility of formally paying particular bills once all roommates have transferred their respective shares.

If you have moved into an already established household, it is vital that you acquire the important bank details of your roommates.

The earlier you ask, the better.

Also, ALWAYS remember to pay on time. If you can, pay in advance. It helps reduce stress and the possibility of having to take a loan from your mum.

Finally…

Living in a share house is a great opportunity to not only meet great people, but truly experience life. Remember to be flexible, be respectful and most importantly, have fun.

Amy Fairall @AmyEloiseF

T H IS S H OU L D F L O AT Y OUR B O AT As the semester starts up again and your summer glow and sandy hair begin to be replaced by the stress of looming due dates, you may be wondering how you’re going to survive another year of uni. Well fear not, for the solution may be closer than you think.

At the beginning of November 2013, Megan Sproats opened her new business, Cocoon Floatation. Located in Figtree, Cocoon Floatation is a business that allows customers to spend an hour floating in the cocoon like floatation tanks that are said to provide an experience like no other.

If like me, up until now your only real knowledge of floatation tanks has been influenced by The Simpsons, then there really is a lot we’re missing out on. Floatation provides a lot more than, ‘A wild ride without ever leaving the building’ as Homer describes.

“Floating helps the symptoms of fibromyalgia, depression, stress and anxiety, insomnia, back pain, arthritis, bad circulation, magnesium deficiencies, jetlag, hypnosis and poor energy levels to name a few,” says Sproats. “I have a lot of athletes floating as it keeps the muscles lose and relaxed and recovers the body rapidly and prevents post-race letdown.”

You’re probably thinking, how can simply floating in water repair so much damage and why can’t I perform this in my bathtub? Well

there are a few extra ingredients needed that you may not find at home.

“The float tank holds 10 inches of water and 350kg of Epsom salts.

This amount of salt makes the water extremely dense so when you lay down, you instantly float like a cork,” explains Sproats.

“The water is kept at a constant 34.5 degrees. This is skin receptor neutral, which means you lose track of where your body ends and the water begins. You are floating in what feels like a zero gravity environment. With the tank light turned off the outside world disappears and amazing things happen,” says Sproats.

But is not just one’s physical health that can be benefited from floatation. Whilst floating, the brain releases endorphins, which allow for a massive mood high that can last up to days after the float.

“I have a lot of people floating who experience depression” says Sproats, “they have found floating has really helped elevate their mood.”

After about half an hour of floating, one’s brain can change to reach what is known as the ‘theta state’.

This is essentially a meditative state that would usually take years of practise to achieve but can be established in just a short

floatation experience.

“If you are a psychonaut interested in exploring various states of consciousness, the tank is a must!

Moments of self-realisation and reports of personal epiphanies abound,” says Sproats.

But what can floatation offer me as a student? I hear you ask. How about a personal place where, literally nothing can distract you?

The dark other-worldly depths of the tank increase concentration, allow for information absorption and permit creativity and imagination to flow.

“People can bring in waterproof headphones to listen to whatever they wish for learning purposes. I have a lot of students floating at exam time also because this has helped them with the stress of that time,” says Sproats.

Although the price of an hour long float at Cocoon will set you back $77, it is comparable to the price of a massage, which simply does not yield the same physical and mental effects as floatation.

Besides, you never know what weird and wonderful things you will discover about yourself in the tank.

Frequent Floater Programs are also available and are able to be shared, reducing the cost of each float to about $60. *Cat and sandwich hallucinations not included

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THE B OUN D A RIES OF A R T Blake Stanbridge @blakestanbridge

‘The Arts’ reflect the diverse lives we all live and just like one’s life, they too transform, grow and evolve, reminding us of our humanity and challenging or cementing the very core values and foundations of our beliefs. As eras have passed and art movements been shaped, society is now subject to eclectic arrays of art forms and artworks, though not all are as widely accepted and appreciated as art. If art is about emotions and expression, should it always be respected, or is there a boundary of what art should or can represent?

On the 7th of January 2015 the music world went into frenzy with the release of Australian singer and songwriter, Sia’s new music video for ‘Elastic Heart’.

The music video features actor and performance artist, Shia LaBeouf, 28, and child dance star, Maddie Ziegler, 12, performing a powerful interpretive dance piece whilst in the confines of a large cage. Sia, who performs away from the audience and hides her face in all media interviews, is no stranger to working with Ziegler, who was also the main focus in Sia’s hit music video of ‘Chandelier’. ‘Chandelier’ was widely praised by critics world wide, despite still alluding to elements of darker themes.

The ‘Elastic Heart’ performance however has come under much scrutiny for supposedly presenting pedophilic elements, with viewers believing the relationship between LaBeouf and Ziegler to be highly sexualized and inappropriate. Both performers are seen throughout the clip, dancing in dirty, beige undergarments, touching and moving around the cage space with each other. The ambiguity of the music video and art in general, has also opened

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many different doors of interpretations. Individuals have likened the concept to that of a father and daughter relationship, rather than a pedophilic one, whilst others see the two performers as different parts of one psyche, battling with both the past and present. Features editor, Justine Harman from Elle, has even gone as far to liken the concept of the video to that of the plot of James Cameron’s blockbuster, Titanic. Regardless of the performance’s true intent, and despite Sia’s creative intention, the music video has been clearly labeled by some as disturbing and sickening, which raises the question – ‘is there a line an artist should not cross when creating art in order to avoid such a public uproar or rejection?’

Sia has since taken to Twitter apologising for any offence that the music video may have caused, tweeting “I anticipated some ‘pedophilia!!!’ Cries for this video’, whilst continuing to add “I apologize to those who feel triggered by #ElasticHeart. My intention was to create some emotional content, not to upset anybody”. The blonde bobbed performer also further defended her artistic choices and intent, claiming that she felt that LaBeouf and Ziegler were “the only actors I felt could play these two warring ‘Sia’ self-states.”

What if art is the very mirror that society must hold up and look into to see contemporary life? Just because one individual does not like the reflection, should the mirror be broken or laid back down? Art is about the risk. Art is for the individual. If not, then could art cease to be purposeful and diminished down to purely just being that pretty, dusty painting sitting on a bleak white wall?

B UI L D IN G BLOCKS Sally Krajačić @sally Krajačić

I’m going to tell you about a place of the weird and the wonderful; where the beach is the front yard and Mt Keira is the back. You leave your shoes at the door and wander around the house barefoot; a playground for all. This is Wollongong, make yourself at home.

Instagram, related or not, when I’m in Wollongong, A place where culture isn’t a trend of some sort, it’s a lifestyle of changing characters. It’s acceptance of the unusual, appreciation of the sheer fact that we live in an incredible environment, and match it with positive personalities.

Voted the happiest city in Australia in 2014 the University of Wollongong is home to thousands of students; local, inter-state, outer state and international. It boasts a vibe only known to those that come to experience it.

Parking my car at the lighthouse overlooking the beach to do my readings became a habit. Climbing Mount Keira and realising that my phone had more reception than when I was on uni grounds was hilarious. Being chased by ducks across the lawn was scary but nevertheless thrilling. A Saturday night out was replaced by a Wednesday or Thursday and consisted of cheap alcohol and a retro playlist that never changed. You never forget the chants on the free bus into town and bagging the shit out of each accommodation campus. All was dandy of course when you got your hangover feed at Chicko’s the next day.

Over a year ago I made an impulsive decision: two months into my first year of uni, and out of all things, I chose to move out of home and live on campus.

Best. Decision. Ever.

I continue to say the exact three words to everyone who asks me what it’s like to live in Wollongong let alone on campus. I have never tried the whole walking around barefoot scene, and I have no idea how to surf or skate. This has never discouraged me from trying new things or accepting the fact that I am an adult who makes all the rules.

When a mate of mine randomly stuck a “We Love the Gong” sticker on my street sign in the Western Suburbs around four years ago, I thought nothing of it. Now I find myself ‘hash tagging’ the slogan in every

Wollongong offers you the materials; it gives you the tools as an adult to be the builder of yourself and your environment, but you can also be a risk taker and have nothing to lose because there will always be something else. I like a challenge, I like balance, I would like it if I could succeed at them both on a surf board. But for now, I definitely like my choices and all the shenanigans that are yet to come.

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F L UFF Y D OESN ’ T LIVE H ERE Claudia Popski @claudiecordial_

The moving staircases at Hogwarts in Harry Potter have got nothing on UOW’s Building 19. It’s the university’s faculty headquarters for Law, Humanities and the Arts and is easily one of the more difficult buildings to navigate on campus. With the front half of the building stretching three stories high and the back only reaching two (that’s building on hills for you) it’s no wonder it’s a mystery. There are maps in every entry way to the building, however, if you’ve never had a class in there before then here are some tips for you: Don’t get flustered. If you think you are lost beyond hope and are going to have to live inside building 19 for the rest of your life, never fear! There is always someone in the building who is more than happy to point you in the right direction or help you find someone who can. There are memes about how horrible this building is, so do not feel embarrassed in the slightest.

Try and leave a little earlier because you don’t want

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to be that person that walks in 20 minutes late.

Once you find a route to that room, stick to it. Do not get overly confident halfway through the semester and try and go a different way. You will probably go up the wrong set of stairs and make three wrong left turns and end up where you started. My friend did this about 6 weeks into semester and walked right passed me when trying to get to the opposite end of the building.

If you find someone who is headed in the same direction you are, and you think they’re a somewhat decent person; don’t let them go. They are your new best friend. Getting lost and trying to find a building was how I met my first friend on orientation day. She hasn’t been able to get rid of me since.

While building 19 isn’t hiding any three headed dogs named Fluffy, it does hold things like the key to your future with all of its exciting tutorials and great academics. I wish you the best in all your Building 19 endeavours!

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FE AT URE A R T IS T

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P e r p e t u al possibilities: R o s ha n G u r m e e t S i n gh

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Kelsey Sutor @kelseysutor

Have you ever caught yourself thinking about the entirety of the universe?

On occasion, I have looked up at the stars only to think of how many millions of light years away they are burning. It’s enough to make you shudder at our seemingly small insignificance or to realise the potential of humanity to explore and grow.

No, this is not my attempt to become the next Agent K in Men in Black, (I want to hang with Will Smith, is that too much to ask?) it’s in this train of thought we find the work of visual artist Roshan Gurmeet Singh.

“It is quite humbling to be able to look up at the stars and wonder the possibilities of our origins, our place in this vast starry galactic neighbourhood. Life is prevalent in all forms, all dimensions, akin to the rose that invigoratingly sprouts from concrete,” says Singh.

The 33-year-old Singaporean artist, who has a myriad of interests including journalism and poetry, found himself seeking other creative outlets three years ago.

“Growing up in Singapore gave me the opportunity

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to be exposed to a kaleidoscope of cultures, art and expressions from many different walks of life. Art has confounded me for a very long time. For the longest time, expressing in words was like speaking in one language.”

Whilst his artworks explore the juxtaposition of human life, there are a few common structural elements amongst his pieces; a sense of surrealism, the use of layering, appropriation and images such as galaxies and religious and occult symbols.

But Singh himself, like in his conceptual approach, focuses on the middle of the continuum when creating his pieces, choosing not to start with a particular medium or discourse in mind.

“The concepts and materials are like the scaffolding of the body for the mind. Texture is what I seek out in the layering. What arises from an idea composes as the cessations of that space-time resonates, pulsates and ferment; from an idea to what you see, or want to see” “I utilize a number of mixed media applications.

Layering, accentuating, superimposing, and mixing other techniques as I work in the whirlwind of expression. Often learn new techniques as I go.”

It’s hard not to get wrapped up in the way Singh sees the world and how his view seeps into his works. In The assayer of jewels (pictured), a man is portrayed wielding a sword in a transparent galaxy. Who has the balance of power? Humanity or the universe around us? Is it even about power? Could it be about balance, considering both the figure and the universe occupy the same amount of space on the piece?

What makes this work and Singh’s other pieces work is the fact that these questions are not answered by the artist, rather we, humanity, reflect upon our position. We see ourselves as the figure looking out into a galaxy (just like in Men in Black when Will Smith… sorry) and then we loop back to our original thought – are we big or are we small?

Because of his exploration of humanity in his art, it’s no surprise Singh looks outside the art world for inspiration from masters of other fields.

“Nikola Tesla is one of many masters whom has influenced my perceptions along with Rabindranath Tagore, the great wordsmith from India. The history of the human species highly influences my work.”

Of course, I can sit here and attempt to tell you what some of Singh’s selected works are trying to convey or ask a bunch of questions, but I’m going to leave that up to Singh, our eloquent artist: On Temptation; The awakening of knowledge, where the Apple logo sits below the Illuminati symbol on a Washington D.C. building, spreading the trademark rainbow colour out of the scene, icons of “Americana”.

“Capitalism is the powerhouse of the technological era. It is the avenue that perpetuates a symbiotic relationship between humans and computers. As we are catalysing towards this singularity as a species, intentions play a vital role in the realities we choose to create… Now we have a saturation of intention personalised by ‘Big Brother’.”

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“That’s a world where individuality is dying and there’s no reason for it be. Truth does not have to be a forbidden fruit,” says Singh.

On Sacrifice triggers new beginnings, the famous ‘pill’ scene from the Matrix is depicted, in a collage of flowers and occult symbols: “In that movie, written and directed by the Wachowski Bros has elements that reflect the human condition as it is. It is the romantisation of spirituality, suppressed knowledge and incredible possibilities. Aren’t we all seeking to be unplugged from the matrix of routine and be unbounded by the revolution of reinvention via the Self.

Also in that particular scene, the camera is in first person when the main character is given the choice to choose. It is an interesting technique that takes the illusive perception of the screen, into a something personal. Furthermore, the idea of a red pill and blue pill is very metaphorical. I personally think, everything it all comes down to the dichotomy of choice and

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choiceless-ness. Discovery, love, adventure on one end of the spectrum or fear and ignorance on the other. Consume an idea and it becomes your reality, doesn’t it?”

Singh will continue to explore and push the limits of such a reality. With each of his works questioning the boundaries of our realities and our known truths, his future plan for his art is to explore new aspects of his own universe.

“I am keen on taking my art to the world. Currently, I am learning to create art through the medium of film.

Along the way, am always open to new challenges; who knows which way the wind will blow.”

C RE AT I V E W RI T IN G

If you want to check out more of Roshan Gurmeet Singh’s work, it can be found at http://lighthouse. c re v a d o . c o m / b e t w e e n - l i f e - a n d - l u n a c y - l i e s art/1512116

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Beth looks up at Madame Zimmer standing in front of her. Her arms are eagle spread and her jingling beaded gown catches the warm, dim light of the small room. The psychic has her eyes peeled wider than the owl sitting on its perch behind her. Beth scrunches her face, the spicy chai-like aroma suffocating her she wonders when her future will be revealed.

Madame Zimmer’s face leaks colour, her hands began trembling on the table. The air Beth had been inhaling only a few moments ago becomes thicker than blood. She leans forward, her gaze intent on Madame. The need to know burns so intensely in Beth’s chest.

“What is it, Madame? Tell me!”

The psychic gasps, snapping her attention to her client.

“Oh, I forgot you were here.”

Beth groans and relaxes into her chair. “Gee, thanks.

Now tell me what you saw.”

“I saw…”

“Yes?” “Your death.”

A cold silence falls upon the room.

“Oh, I was hoping you’d tell me something else.

Like if Craig is going to propose to me or not.”

“Your death is near.”

“For God’s sake, woman, just tell me how it happens.”

The psychic stares into Beth’s eyes the room swallows itself until all Beth can see are two crinkled brown eyes.

“I’d avoid supermarkets because your death is caused by…”

“Tell me!” Beth’s patience running paper thin.

“Peaches.” * Beth cannot get the idiotic psychic’s voice out of her head as she walks home.

The peaches are coming.

What? You’re crazy! I’m leaving!

Do as you will, child, but I’ve warned you now. No turning back.

Sounds of a hammer tinkering on nails reaches her ears as her house appears into view. Renovations have been underway since Craig, her lover and almost foreseen fiancée, chipped in and they bought the house together. Beth is welcomed home by the

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SI M P LY PEACHY

WAR ON H A IR

Sofia Casanova overwhelming aroma of fresh paint and sawdust. Curious to see his progress, she follows the scent to the living room and is confronted by the ugliest sight.

The walls are coated in fresh black paint.

“Craig!”

“What?”

“The walls are black.” Her teeth have grinded together, her mouth pulled in like she has sucked a lemon, “Why are the walls black?”

“Hun, they’re peach coloured.”

Beth does not believe him – he has to be joking.

But the evidence is laid out around her. Empty pain cans labelled ‘fuzzy peach’ with paint brush swirls scrapping at a cream orange paste. Fear tickles her ribcage and her legs are slowly sliding into numbness.

This is madness.

Craig pats her on the head and tells her he’s going on a grocery run, leaving Beth staring at the walls wishing they would melt away. * A loud clutter in the kitchen lures Beth from her bedroom door to glimpse down the hallway. Believing Craig to be home, she hurries down with an apology for acting so foolish.

The kitchen is almost empty.

There is no Craig in sight.

No groceries piled onto the bench.

All she can see is a large round black platter placed in the centre of the dining table, and on this platter is an arranged pyramid of peaches.

Fuzzy, perfectly ripe peaches. * It is not until later in the afternoon that Craig arrives home with his shopping haul. He calls out for Beth to help him and receives no answer in return. As he carries the bags in, he notices the decorative platter on the dining table and a trail of peaches rolled out on the floor like scattered flowers on a wedding aisle.

After picking them all up and setting them back on the platter, his stomach grumbles in anger.

So he takes the juiciest, softest one from the top and sinks his teeth into its flesh.

Angus Rodgers Some girls don’t like hairy men.

And I am not feeling the love.

We got hairless bodies frozen in marble and stone staring down at us from building tops. Their cold dead eyes judging our worth and our tastes like a character out of Mean Girls.

We got underwear models staring sensually from lifeless glossy sheets of photographic paper. A celebration of the chiselled perfection inherent in the male form, these tanned Herculean pretties raise manicured eyebrows and stretch skin over ultra-defined cheek bones in an attempt to smirk as Neanderthals walk on by.

We got magazine articles and TV screaming and shouting about the curse of hair. Waxing and lasers and great beams of therapeutic light designed to burn that pesky product of testosterone away. We got a prescribed view of perfection beamed directly into our brains like it’s an equation.

So yeah, with all that white noise it’s no wonder that some girls don’t like hairy men.

And hell, I don’t blame them. It all comes down to personal preference. I can dig it. They want to see the whole package. They want to see those defined abs and that smooth skin. They want to run their hands over limbs of polished stone and feel a little bit of friction that feels like satin sheets being ripped away from your body.

But if you’re the kind of girl who likes a little mystery to their play things, you know where to look. A girl who likes a bit of a fuzzy outline around the general shape of a man. Is that a six-pack down there or just an interesting, and vaguely confusing, pattern built out of man-fur? Are those rock hard pecks or just

strangely dense clumps of body hair? Can I make a rug from that rug? I don’t know you tell me, run your hands through it and see what you find. It’s an adventure.

Do you like cuddles? I’m your personal Valentine’s Day teddy bear, complete with a heart shape box of chocolates and sappy catch phrases. Want something a little more intense? Look again, I am your grizzly bear. I got fangs and I got fur. I am a few steps behind on the evolutionary parade. I am a beast hiding behind a t-shirt and jeans. Tell me I ain’t sexy.

I am an animal. I am soft and warm, I am mighty and harsh. I howl with wolves and roar with bears. I hug kittens. I play with puppies. I don’t go chasing perfection but instead wait for beauty. My skin and my body and my scars are hidden behind armour made from natural fibres, and I know beauty will come knocking with a similar array of weaponry to call upon.

Because it’s a war between civilisation and nature out there. Adonis stands upon his pedestal and shoots, long range, with his perfect bow of green paper. He fires coins of silver into the hearts of grizzled underdogs. We wild wanderers, we furry brothers, are few and far between nowadays thanks to this barrage. We are rare. We are precious. We just made it onto the endangered species list.

Better get in quick, ladies, before stock runs out.

Who needs perfection when you got a piece of ugly to call your own?

You can have all the marble you want but it won’t keep your warm at night.

For that you need a little bit of wool.

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D ORO T C A I A Hayley Scrivenor

Casey Vanderpoel rode the bus to work, wiping sleep from her eyes and frowning softly to herself.

She would be late this morning, but found it difficult to summon the necessary sense of immediacy to really care. Blinding light hit her full in the face as the bus rounded a corner and the sun emerged from behind a conglomerate of buildings. She squinted and played the familiar daydream over in her mind. She imagined what it would be like if she had the power to change and morph bodies.

Moulding and shaping her own skin so that certain areas were smaller, others larger. She could morph until her lips were full, her hair, long and luxurious, her teeth white. Then she could turn her attention to others. She would perform painless, instant plastic surgery on clients sworn to secrecy and grow rich.

The movement of the bus moved her thoughts along as well, freely floating from thoughts of plastic surgery to food, to the Second World War, images of Dresden and Hiroshima shortly giving way to a mental shopping list of what she needed to get from Target next time she was there. She needed a colander, she remembered. She thought, as she often did, what she would say if someone asked her to name any skill in less than thirty seconds. This was another favourite daydream of hers, because in the daydream if she said it quick enough, she was granted the skill for life. “I want to read, write, speak and understand every language in the world perfectly” she practiced silently. For some reason the highpoint of this particular daydream always seemed to be imagining a conversation on the bus where someone called her fat in Farsi. Sometimes the fantasies were of her translating for Obama, but mostly they were of responding to insults that the speakers had thought would be unintelligible to the freckled and chubby blonde woman sitting across from them on the bus. Returning to thoughts of magic powers, she thought she would definitely change her toes if she could morph. Finally, all those op-shop shoes, always just one size too small for her, could be made to fit.

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When someone says “you look beautiful!” they really mean “for you”, Casey thought aloud to herself. Some people look beautiful completely naked, hair slicked back and no makeup. Casey knew she was not one of those people. Casey stole a look at the two men in the seat opposite her, talking animatedly in a language she couldn’t understand but that she would guess to be Hindi.

She had been to India once, as part of a gap year before she had settled into the daily grind of a full time job. She sighed aloud and one of the men turned his head slightly to look at her. Casey made a quick mental list of her faults. She couldn’t put on makeup properly. She spoke too much, all her words coming out in one incessant stream. She had a knack for always telling people more than they wanted to hear.

For teen minutes of that bus ride, Casey had the power to change the world. For ten minutes she was the most powerful person ever to have lived.

If you had asked her how she was feeling during those ten minutes she may have told you that she felt a bit tingly and that her work pants were uncomfortably tight. For several hundred seconds she held the power to erase all human-caused suffering from the world. She needed only to touch each of her fingers to her thumb, one at time, and say “let all hatred and violence be gone from the world” and it would have happened. As the result of a long and complicated chain of universal events that are far to involved to go into in this story, Casey had been granted this power, but was to remain completely ignorant of it until shortly before her death, long after the power itself had run its short, pre-determined course.

Casey scratched her ass discreetly as she alighted from the bus and a longstanding blood feud between two ancient families in the village of Dorotcaia, Moldova dissolved instantly. Casey was not aware, of course, that she had caused this, but the families involved held a feast that lasted for weeks and included all the villages for miles around.

THE E V I L RE P T I L I A N K I T T EN - E AT ER ACCEPTS THE NO B E L P RI Z E

Jemma Payne

Before I make you weary with: “honoured, humbled, this award” I must address a query which cannot simply be ignored.

For as some of you people have implied, correctly so, our true nature can’t be denied directly, so yes, it’s true, lizard people do exist! And you know what?

You’re now all screaming, but I must persist, cos what you’ve got is a Nobly Prized rhymester who, although I didn’t plan it, is an evil reptilian kitten-eater from another planet.

Now if you are acquainted with those books of Mister Icke’s, you’ll know we’ve often feinted in your global politics.

Yep, it’s us, inside the skin of Shorten, Milne and Abbott, I’ll just pause here, let it sink in.

Does that explain a lot?

So though I was an English ace, my ballads snick and snarky, my folks thought this did not befit the race of Annunaki.

“You can’t waste your evil flair on Shakey-spear and puny verse!

That’s not considered a career in our part of the Universe.”

“Go into politics,” Mum said, “And take your pick of party – as you know, they’re all in bed with the Illuminati.”

I took refuge in a pantoum, was halfway through a villanelle when they called me to the living room. I thought it was to give me Hell.

I quickly ate some baby mice to fortify my strength, which by that point was my one vice, but then Dad spoke at length – the gist: “Well, son, we did

expect you’d want to crush a nation with iron fist, but we respect your self-determination.”

Don’t fear, I realised in advance you’d likely not be smitten that there’s a chance I just drank human blood and ate a kitten, so many years ago I did not fail to set my diet to people foods, except for quail (it’s too cute, I won’t try it.)

Now don’t you go on thinking I’ve been trying to deceive: see, I’ve written it for ages but nobody would believe me!

It started with a recount of my hols in A. Centauri; my kindy teacher marked it with, “A fascinating story!”

And every time I try since, with however much conviction, you cry “poetic licence” and call it a work of fiction.

And when my verse addressed my jaunts around the fourth dimension, the fact it was confessional escaped your comprehension.

I find that scribes are chilled-out sorts, but sometimes it is hard to hope that they’ll accept the fact their laureate’s a lizard.

I’ve always been an optimist.

You’ll soon take me for who I am, even if you’re kind of pissed that my face is a hologram.

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IN T H E C OFFEE SHOP

W AT ER V A P OR

Y OU

B L IN D

Anne Apanski

Sally Krajacic

Zoe Ridgeway

Claudia Popski

In between movements on their friendship, sipping dabbing perfect little palettes, forking lettuce and shreds and crumbs, a lettuce leaf, a carrot strand composed and disappeared through finite pink lips fingers adoring the fork towards her heart little beating mouthfuls.

eyes wander to the sky above water and ice scatter lights a roof of shade within the blue dome of air the pillow white delight art of a cloud

It’s a shame the sun never hits what’s inside.

That you can’t open your mouth to the sky And have its rays fall inside of you.

You wish you could let that light bask in your gut long enough for your stomach to digest it, because the saying goes you are what you eat and you want to be fucking sunshine.

That way the warmth will linger a little longer.

You could store it away until it’s too dark to see and too drunk to think.

And you’re in that sequined shirt black leather skirt covered in cocktails and tears.

And while you try to vomit up your fears that sunshine will fill your throat as you heave onto the ashphalt.

That pool of sparkling bile will run for a while down the hill.

I dreamed you kissed me, all teeth and nothing sweet about it, You told me I was the most georgous girl you’ve ever met, then you moved on to the next girl and did the same.

I thought it was all part of the game we played.

I waited until the sun rose and set, I waited until winter frost became summer heat, I waited until you realised I was good enough.

I was always good enough Maybe even better, You were just too blind to see that

Hands flamenco, recomposed, closed in prayer.

If they stroked you with those hands you would die.

If they lay upon your bed you would photograph them, If they brought a birthday it would be heaven.

You would spend hours arranging laying them down again Another small peck.

The Geishas, rose up, up, cleaned their hands, placed everything as if they had never been there.

Then we noticed the halo of light above That table.

He wasn’t.

In the moonlight.

And you’ll remember, finally you’ll remember at least the moon is warm.

At another table a young poet haunches up around her neck growling over her rogered veal spine like the harbour bridge.

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C H I L D REN ’ S D RE A M S B ROU G H T T O L IFE AT W OO D FOR D Heather Wortes

PHOTOGRAPHY FE AT URE

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Monsters roam the streets at Woodford Folk Festival each year, scaring festival goers and generally wreaking havoc as street theatre performers tend to do.

A one-eyed, friendly giant called Softie wanders around eating anything in sight; particularly children.

Alongside him the ten heads of Spike, the threehorned green monster, roam in every direction and towering over the crowd is Bob – big, black and very hairy.

The monsters were drawn by children from Woodford and Mooloolaba State Schools as part of the 2013 Woodford Folk Festival’s theme, ‘Facing Your Fears Away’.

The children’s drawings were selected from over 300 entries and converted into the six metre tall monster puppets by the Knee High Puppet Company.

Major Projects Producer for Woodford Folk Festival,

Kate McDonald says that the monsters were the end product of a large scale community arts project that provided an opportunity for local school students to connect with professional artists.

“It was a wonderful process for the students to get to work with an artist and have their drawing validated into something that was seen as having great artistic credibility,” she says.

“They gave feedback to the puppet makers along the way to make sure that the artists were staying true to their drawing. It was a very empowering process for them.”

Three people were needed to operate the ten heads of Spike, which Kate says is the most challenging of the three puppets.

“The puppet maker, who is highly experienced having been doing this for over ten years, says he has never made a puppet quite as complicated as a ten-headed one,” she says.

The performers behind Spike, Softie and Bob were graduating theatre students from the Queensland University of Technology’s Creative Industries Faculty.

Kate says the project has maintained this strong University partnership, with students who performed at the 2013 Festival returning again this year.

Woodford Folk Festival is a week-long celebration of music, art, dance, theatre and comedy held annually over the Christmas and New Year period. More than 120,000 Woodfordians attend the festival each year and (from personal experience) return home happy, peaceful and find readjusting to the real world extremely difficult.

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Feb 27 Caravana Sun w/ The Siren Songs & Steel City Muthafunkas UOW Unibar, $12 for Students, $15 for General Admission Feb 28 My Echo w/ Supports TBA Rad Bar, $12 Pre Book, $15 Door Mar 5th Kingswood w/ Supports TBA UOW Unibar, $20 for students, $25 for General Admission Mar 6th The Rumjacks Dicey Rileys, Free Entry Mar 11 Barefoot Alley w/ Bones & Hot Coffee Rad Bar, Free Mar 12 UOW Garden Party w/ DMA’s,

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Palms, Twinsy plus more TBA UOW Unibar, $20 for Students, $27 for General Admission

Apr 4th Michael Franti & Spearhead Waves, $60

Mar 14 Farmer & The Owl Festival w/ Jebediah, The Mess Hall, DZ Deathray’s, Hockey Dad plus many more UOW Unibar, First Release Sold Out, Second Release $69

Apr 9th The Beards w/ The Stiffy’s & more TBA UOW Unibar, $25

Mar 24 Vance Joy w/ #1 Dads & Airling Anita’s Theatre, $41 Mar 27th Trinity Roots w/ King Tide & Karl S. Williams UOW Unibar, $15 Winterbourne w/ Supports TBA Rad Bar, $12 Pre Book, $15 at the door Jurassic 5 Waves, $70

Apr 10th Thundamentals Waves, $30 Weekly Spots Thursdays Jam Night at Howling Wolf Bar Fridays Free live music at Jane’s every Friday

GIG G UI D E

Tyler Rose @Theycott

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