Issue 765

Page 1

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Of Of Douglas Douglas & & Elbert Elbert Counties Counties

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Issue 765 - April 23, 2012

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Think of all those little things you just couldn’t live without. How long have they really been around? This week, Tidbits investigates the origin of several of those conveniences we make use of on a regular basis.

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• If you think we’ve always used envelopes, think again! This simple item didn’t come along until 1845. Prior to that, folks simply folded letters both ways and sealed them with wax. Pre-gummed envelopes weren’t introduced for another 50 years.

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• Earl Tupper founded his company in 1938, promoting his new line of polyethylene containers with airtight seals named, appropriately, Tupperware. The items were initially sold in department stores, but in the early 1950s, the marketing strategy was changed to the familiar Tupperware “party.” Tupper didn’t just make bowls and cups; he also had a contract to make gas mask parts during World War II. He sold his plastics company in 1958 for $16 million.

• We all take our polio vaccinations for granted, but they weren’t administered for the first time until 1954, in the city of Pittsburgh, where Dr. Jonas Salk had been conducting his experiments. A 1952 polio epidemic that killed 3,300 and paralyzed thousands inspired Dr. Salk to develop a vaccine. turn the page for more!

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2

Tidbits® of Douglas & Elbert Counties For Advertising Call Tim (303)994-9683 Interesting Stuff

CONVENIENCES (continued): • Chester Carlson spent a good part of his life perfecting the copy machine, receiving a patent in 1937. However, the world didn’t share his vision of one-touch copying, and 20 companies, including IBM, rejected his presentation before it was finally marketed for the first time in 1959 under the name “Xerox 914.” By 1968, Fortune magazine ranked Carlson among the richest people in America. • The 1950s brought all kinds of innovations to the modern home. Velcro, power steering, pocket transistor radios and Legos all hit the scene during this decade. The world’s first credit card, the Diners Club card, was introduced in 1950. Issued in New York City, it offered credit at 27 restaurants. The American Express card came along eight years later. • When your eyes begin to age, you’ll be thankful for one of Benjamin Franklin’s innovations. Our founding father invented bifocal eyeglasses at the age of 79. • Travelers have had the convenience of pulling into a Holiday Inn along the road since the chain opened its first hotel in 1952 in Memphis, Tennessee. • Masking tape was developed by the 3M Company, a sandpaper-making firm, in 1925. One of the company’s young engineers, Richard Drew, was testing sandpaper at an automobile plant and noticed that painters were having difficulty painting the newly popular two-tone cars. Drew went back to 3M and immediately began work on a product to solve the painters’ dilemma. Waterproof transparent “Scotch” tape came along five years later, also the creation of Richard Drew. A 3M co-worker of Drew’s invented the tape dispenser with a built-in cutter blade in 1932. • Thanks to a Chicago inventor, Whitcomb Judson, you can zip up your pants! While experimenting in 1891 with a gadget that would make it easier to button and unbutton shoes, dubbed the “Clasp Locker and Unlocker for Shoes,” Judson came up with the zipper.

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• The fax machine has been around longer than you think. This device that transmits a facsimile of a document through the telephone system has been around since 1944. And how about another item you’d think has been around forever, the ballpoint pen? It came out the same year as that fax machine. Nine years later, Bic introduced their now-famous brand of ballpoint pen. In 1973, Bic presented its next best-selling gadget, the disposable lighter. • Two unrelated items, the voting machine and waxed paper, were both invented by the same person, Thomas Edison. During the 1880s, this brilliant individual filed for a new patent on the averContinued on page 7

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Tidbits of Douglas County 303-994-9683

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Tickets are $10.00 per person before April 28 or $15.00 per person at the door. Contact the front office for details. This is an adult event.


For Advertising Pet Page Call Tim (303)994-9683

Tidbits® of Douglas & Elbert Counties 3

Cat Q & A

The Buddy Center Needs Your Help

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(Part 3 of 4: Vinnie; Billie; Roxie and Columbine) Senior cats are special companions for senior owners. Roxie was a cat that had the luck to be under the care of a loving group of shelter workers at Happy Cats Haven in Colorado Springs. Roxie had become expendable in her current family with a new baby on the way, four dogs terrorizing her and now a major medical problem – hyperthyroidism. The director, Melissa Shandley, contacted Dr. Jim Olson about the possibility of having Roxie treated for hyperthyroidism. Cat Specialist has an unwritten policy of trying to help special needs cats. Roxie was treated for hyperthyroidism with radio-iodine and has been doing extremely well.

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With Roxie’s health concerns taken care of, finding her a new home was a top priority. Happy Cat Haven shelter and Cat Specialist set about finding a great home for Roxie. The staff at Cat Specialist created picture signs for around the hospital and a list of clients were called that had shown interest in adopting a new cat. We were unable to find people who would adopt her in our area but Happy Cat Haven shelter found a perfect match in Colorado Springs. A follow-up picture of Roxie showed her sitting on a grand piano. Roxie has found a new home and people to train!

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For Advertising Call Tim (303)994-9683 4 Twenty Questions Tidbits® of Douglas & Elbert Counties

20 QUESTIONS

SPORTS QUIZ By Chris Richcreek 1. Name the first center fielder to lead the American League in home runs for three consecutive years. 2. Who played the most major-league games with only one team: Stan Musial, Cal Ripken Jr. or Carl Yastrzemski? 3. When was the last time before 2010 that San Diego State’s football team won a bowl game? 4. How many head coaches have won an NBA championship in the past 25 seasons (1987-2011)? 5. Who was the last goaltender before St. Louis’ Brian Elliott in the 2011-12 season to allow two or fewer goals in each of his first 12 games? 6. What team holds the Major League Soccer record for best goal differential for a season? 7. Who was the first president of the Pro Bowlers Association? Answers 1. Ken Griffey Jr., 1997-99. 2. Yastrzemski (3,308) tops Musial (3,026) and Ripken (3,001). 3. It was 1969 (the Pasadena Bowl). 4. Eight -- Phil Jackson (11), Gregg Popovich (four), Pat Riley (three), Chuck Daly (two), Rudy Tomjanovich (two), Larry Brown (one), Rick Carlisle (one) and Doc Rivers (one). 5. Boston’s Frank Brimsek in 1938-39. 6. The Los Angeles Galaxy had a plus-41 goal differential in 1998. 7. Don Carter, in 1958.

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Answers: 1. Buckingham Palace (duuuh!) 2. Yes. Diamonds burn in pure oxygen at about 1320 degrees Fahrenheit 3. A Tale of Two Cities by Charles Dickens 4. Tonto 5. Ian Flemming 6. True 7. They both are temperature record-holders: Antarctica for the coldest temperature and Libya for the hottest. 8. Ringo Star 9. Monosodium Glutamate 10. Red 11. Baseball 12. European Union 13. A birth in the NCAA Basketball Tournament 14. A Russian made rifle 15. Alaska 16. Cigarettes 17. An internet search engine 18. True 19. Luxury automobile 20. England

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1. In 1703 the Duke of Buckingham built what great palace in England? 2. Can you burn diamonds? 3. What book starts out with this line: “It was the best of times and the worst of times”? 4. What was the name of The Lone Ranger’s sidekick? 5. Who authored the James Bond novels? 6. True or False: At the age of three months, a human embryo has fingerprints. 7. What do Libya and Antarctica have in common? 8. What famous musician said of his band, “We were just four guys who loved each other.” 9. MSG is the abbreviation for what food additive? 10. Is “Manhattan” clam chowder red or white? 11. In the 1984 movie, The Natural, what sport did Robert Redford play? 12. You often see the initials EU in the news. What do they stand for? 13. If your college team makes it to “The Big Dance”, what have they achieved? 14. What is a Kalashnikov? 15. Where is Glacier Bay? 16. What popular product does the R. J. Reynolds Company manufacture and sell? 17. What is Google? 18. True or False: gout is a form of arthritis. 19. What is a Bentley? 20. Where are they built?

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The cat's-eye chrysoberyl reminds many of the eye of a panther with its distinct band of light that crosses its face from top to bottom or side to side. This mysterious looking gemstone is a cousin of the color-changing alexandrite. Chrysoberyl colors range from a honey brown to an apple green with the rich gold colors deemed the most valuable. The principal value factor is the strength and sharpness of the eye. Fine cat’s-eye chrysoberyl often shows a “milk and honey” effect. When a bright light is directed at the side of the stone, one side of the eye will be milky white while the other will glow a honey gold. If you rotate the stone, the colors switch. Perhaps the changing aspect of this stone is why men love cat’s-eye chrysoberyl in their jewelry. And then there’s the myth that a cat’s eye can point fortune in the direction of the one wearing it – just another reason to own this enigmatic gemstone. If you want to find a cat’s-eye for yourself you’ll have to travel to Sri Lanka, Brazil or China and while you’re hunting, don’t confuse the real chrysoberyl cat’s eye with quartz cat’s eyes. Or just drop in to Pinetree Jewelers and we’ll help you find the perfect cat’s eye for you. Scott McQueen is the owner of Pinetree Jewelers, Parker’s oldest jewelry store established in 1976. It is located at 11028 S. Pikes Peak Drive in Parker. For more information on gemstones or jewelry of any kind call 303.841.2666

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Each Week, Tidbits of Douglas County catches readers with our paper. We will take a picture of them and place them in our Reader of the Week. Could you be next?

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Of Of Douglas Douglas County County Colorado Colorado

Home Improvement StrokeMAKING of Genius Painting YOUR HOUSE A HOME

THIS IS A HAMMER By Samantha Mazzotta Cleaning a Rusty Grill Q: I left my propane grill out on the back deck over the winter. We didn’t get much snow or rain, and actually used it from time to time, so I didn’t cover it. Now I notice some rust on the underside of the grill. What’s the best way to clean it and prevent it from happening again? -- Janice B., Columbia, Md.

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A: You can buy a cleaner that removes rust stains at your local hardware or home-improvement store, or if the rust is mostly surface-based, try wiping the area first with a damp cloth. If not all the rust is removed, try scrubbing the area with a steel-wire brush or steel wool. If the interior of the grill or the grates are rusty or caked with old charcoal and burnt-on food, use the same cleaning methods to scrub them off. Then, clean the interior well (for readers who use charcoal grills, remove the old ashes and charcoal and then clean). Once clean, you’ll want to seal the rust-damaged areas. On the outside of your grill, a high-temperature paint will keep air and moisture away from the metal and won’t flake away quickly. The interior should be cleaned between each grilling session and closed to prevent rain from entering. Grill racks should be washed after cleaning and each use, and a thin coat of cooking oil sprayed or rubbed on them so they stay rustfree between uses. If you’re not going to use the grill for a long time, say several weeks, regardless of the season it should be cleaned, covered with a grill cover and moved out of direct rain and sunlight. Some owners coat the exterior of the grill with a thin coat of cooking oil if they plan to store it for some time. HOME TIP: Got a tough cleanup of grill racks? Make a foamy vinegar-baking soda paste and apply to the racks, let them sit for a few minutes, then scrub away burnt-on food and grease. Send your questions or tips to ask@thisisahammer.com, or write This Is a Hammer, c/o King Features Weekly Service, P.O. Box 536475, Orlando, FL 32853-6475.

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Information

For Advertising Call Tim (303)994-9683

Tidbits® of Douglas & Elbert Counties

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CONVENIENCES (continued): age of every five days, equaling more than 1,300 items over the course of his creative life. The motion picture camera and projector, incandescent light bulbs and the phonograph are well-known Edison inventions, with lesser-known innovations being the stock ticker, dictating machine and electric pen. • What would your life be like without computers? Although many would claim the honor of inventing the world’s first computer, a 1973 American court decision officially awarded this achievement to Dr. John V. Atanasoff, a physics professor at Iowa State University. Although Dr. Atanasoff had devised his digital computer with a memory drum back in 1939, he was not credited as the “father of American computing” until after years of patent litigation. President George Bush conferred the National Medal of Science and Technology to him in 1990. • The next time you strike a match, consider the fact that this little convenience has been around since 1816, when a Frenchman developed a friction match with a phosphorus tip, providing a simple means of access to fire. • Do you run faster in your Nikes? No one did, prior to 1972. That’s the year the company introduced its first running shoes, named after the Greek goddess of victory. The company was originally named Blue Ribbon Sports, and remained so until the name change to Nike in 1978.

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• Listerine wasn’t named after its inventor, Dr. Joseph Lawrence, but rather after the acclaimed British surgeon, Dr. Joseph Lister, a pioneer in establishing sanitary operating room procedures. When Lawrence originated the formula in 1879 in his St. Louis laboratory, he intended the concoction to be used strictly in the medical profession as a surgical antiseptic. It wasn’t offered to the public until 1914 when it was marketed as the first over-the-counter mouthwash. • What would sports fans do without instant replays? There was no such thing until 1963, when this was introduced in that year’s Army vs. Navy football game. Fans became so confused, TV stations were flooded with telephone calls. • Housewives across the country were thrilled when the Hurley Machine Company of Chicago launched The Thor, the first electric-powered washing machine, in 1908. It was a drum-like machine with a galvanized tub and electric motor. Due to the efforts of Lillian Gilbreth, we have shelves and butter and egg trays inside refrigerator doors, an electric food mixer, an improved electric can opener and a trash can with a foot pedal lid opener. The mother of 12 children, this industrial engineer was immortalized in the book “Cheaper by the Dozen.”

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For Advertising Call Tim (303)994-9683 8 Strange But True

Tidbits® of Douglas & Elbert Counties Ask the Dentist

STRANGE BUT TRUE by Samantha Weaver

by Dennis L. Burgner, D.D.S., General Dentist Master, Academy of General Dentistry

It was Canadian author Saul Bellow who made the following sage observation: “You never have to change anything you got up in the middle of the night to write.”

Q: Why Are My Teeth Sensitive? A: Exposed underlying tooth structures. When protective

The U.S. military has created self-cleaning underwear. Yep. It seems they wanted skivvies that soldiers could wear for several weeks without changing. Nanoparticles and chemicals in the fabric repel liquids and bacteria.

enamel is worn off, or gums have receded, tiny tubes on

More books have been written about Abraham Lincoln than about any other American president -- more than 15,000 to date.

or cold drinks, touching

It is only to be assumed that Arabella Young, a Massachusetts woman who died in 1771, was considered to be a bit too talkative. Otherwise there would have been no need for the following epitaph: “Here lies as silent clay / Miss Arabella Young, / Who on the 21st of May / Began to hold her tongue.”

movement of fluid within

Be glad that you did not have the misfortune to be in Bangladesh during record storms in 1985. You might have been brained by the record hailstones, some weighing more than 2 pounds each.

drinks and citrus juices, can cause erosion of the protective

You might not be surprised to learn that among his Hollywood friends, screen legend and notorious drinker Humphrey Bogart was nicknamed Whiskey Straight.

enamel and create sensitivity.

the tooth’s surface are exposed.

Certain acidic

foods and beverages, hot your teeth, or breathing in cold air causes sudden the

microscopic

Cindy Rose

tubes.

This fluid movement irritates the nerve within the tooth and triggering pain. Frequent use of acidic beverages and foods, including soft hard enamel, exposing sensitive surfaces. Exposure to strong stomach acid from eating disorders and medical conditions, such as Bulemia and Acid Reflux, respectively, can dissolve the

Q: Can Tooth Sensitivity affect my lifestyle? A:

The founders of the Arby’s chain were a pair of brothers, Forest and Leroy Raffel. They wanted to name the original restaurant Big Tex, but found that the name was already owned by someone else. They settled on Arby’s to represent the initials R.B.’s for Raffel Brothers. *** Thought for the Day: “I never blame myself when I’m not hitting. I just blame the bat, and if it keeps up, I change bats. After all, if I know it isn’t my fault that I’m not hitting, how can I get mad at myself?” -- Yogi Berra

Yes! Pain from sensitive teeth can change your eating,

drinking, and breathing habits. For example, that spoonful of ice cream, or swig of your favorite cold beverage can trigger sensitivity pain. Q: How common is Tooth Sensitivity? A.

Very!

Sensitivity is one of the most common dental

complaints. 40 milllion adults in the United States suffer at some time from sensitive teeth. Q: How can I avoid Tooth Sensivity?

A Different Kind of Church

A: Avoid certain toothpastes, especially highly abrasive

One that supports you spiritually, celebrates diversity, and believes in your unique value as a child of God.

toothpastes, “tartar control”, and “whitening” toothpastes. A: Eliminate excessive biting pressures on your teeth. Bite problems, caused by shifted teeth, malocclusions, or a

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grinding / clenching habit can put traumatic pressures on one or more teeth. This causes inflammation of the nerve within

Come see

the tooth, causing sensitivity pain. Excessive forces can lead to

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irreversible damage to the nerve tissues within the tooth, and require root canal treatment, or loss of the tooth. Tune in next week for “Tooth Sensitivity Q & A, Part Two”, including: What can I do about my sensitive teeth? When is it time

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to see the

dentist? What can the dentist do to help?

You can Ask the Dentist by calling Dr. Burgner at 720-8709500, or consult his website: www.ParkerLumineers.com

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Dr. Burgner has served on the Fellowship Examination Committee of the Academy of General Dentistry (AGD), and received national recognition awards from that 30,000 member organizaation. He has also been recognized in the local magazine 5280. He practices General Family and Cosmetic Dentistry in Parker, Colorado. Please see our ad on page 7 of Tidbits 720-870-9500 10470 S Progress Way #100 Parker, CO 80134

Derek Michael Ash 21 years old 6'2" 140 lbs Brown hair, Brown eyes LKA: Parker, CO Charges: Assault

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Delinquency of Minor, Domestic Violence, Harassment Provide Alcohol to Minor TAKE NO ACTION TO APPREHEND THESE PEOPLE YOURSELF! For immediate action call 303.660.7500 or your local law enforcement agency. To provide information & remain anonymous, call the Douglas County Sheriff’s warrant tip line at: 303.660.7574, email warrants@dcsheriff.net or leave a tip online at www.dcsheriff.net Child Abuse, Domestic Violence

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For Advertising Call Tim (303)994-9683

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Even with Low Rates, You Can Invest for Income

9

Cindy

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Education

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Tidbits® of Douglas & Elbert Counties

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you may need to broaden your search. Here are a few ideas to consider:

Build a bond ladder. Long-term bonds, by their nature, are more subject to interest rate risk than shorter-term vehicles. In other words, interest rates are more likely to rise during the life span of a longer-term bond — and when rates go up, the prices of existing bonds will fall. To help lower this risk, you may want to build a “ladder” of bonds of varying maturities. Then, if market interest rates are low, you’ll still have your long-term bonds earning higher rates, but if rates rise, you can take advantage of them by reinvesting the proceeds of your maturing short-term bonds. But remember to work with your financial advisor to evaluate whether a bond ladder and the securities held within it are consistent with your Weight Management. investment objectives, risk tolerance and financial circumstances. Clothes Getting ready for summer, Dividend-paying stocks. You can find companies that have paid weddings, and reunions. Stockbrokers.com dividends for many consecutive years — and in some cases, inbuy and sell used childrens Free Consultation and creased their dividend payout each year. In 2012, companies listed clothes online go to tiffany lewis health screening by RN in the S&P 500 are on track to pay out more than $252 billion Join weigh loss challenge to get free items with purchase... in dividends, a record amount, according to data compiled from Great brand name baby clothes Cash Prizes!!! Call MaryStandard & Poor’s. (Keep in mind that the S&P 500 is an unmanat discount prices beth 303-841-8484 aged index and is not available for direct investment.) Of course, stock prices will fluctuate in value, and you may receive more or less than your original investment when you sell. Historically, dividend-paying stocks have been less volatile than non-dividendpaying stocks. Be aware, though, that companies can lower or discontinue dividend payments at any time without notice. Past performance is not a guarantee of future results. Parker & Franktown Areas Refinance your mortgage. Today’s low rates are good news for borrowers. With tougher standards in place, it may not be as easy Banks to refinance a mortgage as it once was, but if you qualify, you may Champion Bank..............................................303-840-8484 want to think about refinancing. You may be able to save quite a bit 16790 Centre Ct, Parker of money on your monthly payments — and lower payments can Cabinetry & Kitchen’s translate into a greater cash flow. Plus, if you don’t need all the savBrin Custom Cabinets....................................303-688-6743 ings, you can put some of the money into an Individual Retirement Cell.................................................................303-304-6838 Account (IRA) or another retirement savings vehicles. Cash for Cars & Trucks

Business Directory

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Ultimately, an extended period of low interest rates is just one more factor to consider in creating and adjusting your investment strategy. Work with your financial advisor to help ensure low rates won’t affect your income needs. This article was written by Edward Jones for use by your local Edward Jones Financial Advisor. Cindy Rose, Financial Advisor Edward Jones 2195 N Highway 83 #23 - Franktown, CO 80116 303.688-2127 Member SIPC

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Cyberbullying can take the form of spreading rumors or gossip, posting or sending pictures without consent, assuming someone else’s identity, or using threatening or offensive language. Instead of having to face only one kid, cyberbullying can involve an entire group of kids tormenting another. Kids can get a break from traditional bullying just by going home, but cyberbullying can take place anytime, anywhere. Victims often feel there is no reprieve. Signs a child is being cyberbullied include: • • • • •

Avoids using technology (HUGE red flag) Appears nervous when a text message or email arrives Clears the computer screen or deletes texts whenever you enter the room Withdraws from family and friends Loss of appetite, trouble sleeping, crying or sullenness

Victims of cyberbullying often keep it a secret because they fear their online privileges will be revoked or they’ll be reprimanded. The best way to stop cyberbullying is to prevent it from happening in the first place. Teach your kids to delete suspicious messages without opening them, and to delete cruel or hurtful messages as well. Teach them how to block unwanted contact. And remind them that YOU are their safe haven, no matter what. To learn more, visit www.cyberbulling.us or www. wiredsafety.com. Macaroni Kid Highlands Ranch-Parker-Castle Rock is THE weekly GO-TO source for Douglas County families featuring articles, recipes, crafts, local family-friendly events, and more. Never be bored again! Subscribe for FREE at www.highlandsranch. macaronikid.com and tell them Tidbits sent you!

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Moments in Time

For Advertising Call Tim (303)994-9683

Tidbits® of Douglas & Elbert Counties 11

Mountain Canyon Developement “Excavating is our specialty”

¥ On May 10, 1869, the Union Pacific and Central Pacific railroads meet up in Promontory, Utah, making transcontinental railroad travel possible for the first time in U.S. history. Journeys that had taken months by wagon train or weeks by boat now took only days. ¥ On May 7, 1915, the British ocean liner Lusitania is torpedoed without warning by a German submarine off the coast of Ireland, with 1,198 people drowned. It was later revealed that the Lusitania was carrying about 173 tons of war munitions for Britain, which the Germans cited as justification for the attack. ¥ On May 12, 1925, a Philadelphia radio station broadcasts the first all-star radio program featuring film actors and actresses. Sound films had not yet debuted, and the broadcast marked the first time that most listeners had heard the voices of film stars like Lillian Gish and Marion Davies. ¥ On May 8, 1933, the first police radio system, connecting headquarters to patrol cars and patrol cars to one another, is installed in Eastchester Township, N.Y. The system consisted of one transmitter of 20 watts for the headquarters and two transmitters of 4.5 volts each for the two patrol cars. ¥ On May 13, 1956, Gene Autry’s musical variety show, “Gene Autry’s Melody Ranch,” airs its final broadcast, after 16 years. The show featured 10- to 15-minute skits about cowboys and rustlers, along with musical numbers by Autry, “America’s singing cowboy.” ¥ On May 9, 1960, the Food and Drug Administration approves the world’s first commercially produced birth-control bill. Development of “the pill” was commissioned by birth-control pioneer Margaret Sanger and funded by heiress Katherine McCormick. ¥ On May 11, 1981, reggae legend Bob Marley dies of cancer in Miami Beach, Fla. Marley, born in Jamaica in 1945, formed his band, the Wailers, in 1963. In the early 1970s, the band’s records began to catch on outside Jamaica, assisted by Eric Clapton’s cover of “I Shot the Sheriff.” (c) 2012 King Features Synd., Inc.

Looking for a New Beginning? Join Us A Friendly Place to Worship

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DC Dolphin Basketball win Third-Year Championship!!

The DC Dolphins community would like to congratulate the 5th Grade Boys Dolphin Black basketball team coached by Kevin Vezzani on their third consecutive championship including back-toback undefeated seasons. The team capped off their undefeated season by defeating Warriors White 29-21 on February 13, 2012, at Denver University’s Magness Arena. Congratulations to Caleb, Landon, Ryan, Lucas, Mikail, Joseph, Lance, Nicholas, Marcus, and Bryce on a tremendous accomplishment.


For Advertising Call Tim (303)994-9683 Laugh Lines

Tidbits® of Douglas & Elbert Counties 12

It’s All About Service & Horsepower, Pal! Murphy goes to Church Murphy showed up at Mass one Sunday, and the priest almost fell down when he saw him. He'd never been to church in his life. After Mass, the priest caught up with him and said, "Murphy, I am so glad ya decided to come to Mass. What made ya come?" Murphy said, "I got to be honest with you Father, a while back, I misplaced me hat and I really, really love that hat. I know that McGlynn had a hat just like mine and I knew he came to church every Sunday . I also knew that he had to take off his hat during Mass & figured he would leave it in the back of church. So, I was going to leave after Communion and steal McGlynn's hat." The priest said, "Well, Murphy, I notice that ya didn't steal McGlynn's hat. What changed your mind?" Murphy replied, "Well, after I heard your sermon on the 10 Commandments I decided that I didn't need to steal McGlynn's hat after all." With a tear in his eye the priest gave Murphy a big smile and said;"After I talked about 'Thou Shalt Not Steal' ya decided you would rather do without your hat than burn in hell, eh ?" Murphy slowly shook his head. "No, Father, after ya talked about 'Thou Shalt Not Commit Adultery ' I remembered where I left me hat.

How The Fight Started

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My wife sat down on the couch next to me as I was flipping channels. She asked, ‘What’s on TV?’ I said, ‘Dust.’ And then the fight started... ***************************************** Saturday morning I got up early, quietly dressed, made my lunch, grabbed the dog, and slipped quietly into the garage. I hooked up the boat up to the truck, and proceeded to back out into a torrential downpour. The wind was blowing 50 mph, so I pulled back into the garage, turned on the radio, and discovered that the weather would be bad all day. I went back into the house, quietly undressed, and slipped back into bed. I cuddled up to my wife’s back, now with a different anticipation, and whispered, “The weather out there is terrible.” My loving wife of 10 years replied, “Can you believe my stupid husband is out fishing in that?” And that’s how the fight started... ***************************************** My wife was hinting about what she wanted for our upcoming anniversary. She said, ‘I want something shiny that goes from 0 to 150 in about 3 seconds.’ I bought her a scale. And then the fight started...

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