TNT Magazine / Issue 1468 by TNT Magazine

October 17-23 2011 Issue 1468 tntmagazine.com

WIN!

TICKETS TO FULHAM V EVERTON

RIDING THE WHITE STUFF The best places to hit the slopes this winter

GET HIGH ON HALLOWEEN How being scared is like snorting cocaine

E R A F Y T I N A V swallowing t s ju n a th fe li ereâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s more to th y h w : y t l Food Socie Experimenta

ANGLO PACIFIC SHIPPING & TAX 30th Anniversary OVER 500,000 SATISFIED CUSTOMERS HAVE ALREADY TRUSTED THEIR POSSESSIONS TO ANGLO PACIFIC, LONDON’S LEADING SHIPPERS EXCESS BAGGAGE > Free supply of tea cartons and bubble > Free delivery/collection within M25 > By sea/air/road worldwide > Money Back Guarantee HOUSEHOLD REMOVALS > Free home survey, no obligation > Packed by skilled professionals > Shared or exclusive containers > Motor car/bike specialist shippers TAX REBATES > Average refund £963 secured last year > Online Tax Pack, only 10% commission MONEY TRANSFERS > Competitive exchange rates FINANCIAL PROTECTION > Bonded by the British Association of Removers > Bonded by the Association of Tax Agents > FIDI Accredited International Mover

www.anglopacific.co.uk SO BEFORE YOU CHECK OUT OF EUROPE CHECK OUT ANGLO PACIFIC

FREEPHONE 0800 085 0355 Anglo Pacific International Plc, 5/9 Willen Field Road, Park Royal, London, NW10 7BQ Email: baggage@anglopacific.co.uk Hours: Mon-Fri 8.30am - 6.00pm Sat 9am-1pm

CAROL DRIVER EDITOR carol.driver@tntmagazine.com

EDITOR’S LETTER A huge thanks to everyone who made our Sun & Snow Travel Show such a success. I hope you snapped up some bargains and enjoyed the seminars. See you at the next one in March! If you’re itching to get away, see P72 for the lowdown on the best slopes for any budget. Fancy some sun? We’ve got that covered on P66 with our guide to Tenerife. But before you jet off, get Halloween sorted. See P8 for our horrifying suggestions. Enjoy!

THIS WEEK LONDONDIARY

LONDONNEWS

MY LONDON

DRINK & EATS

14-15

@TNT

SPOTTED

LONDON SOUND

18-19

LISTINGS CLUB & GIGS

20-21

COMPETITION

CHATROOM GROOVE ARMADA

LONDON SCENE

28-29

SPARE TIME LIFESTYLE

31-39

SHOPPING

HEALTH & BEAUTY

32-33

CAREERS

34-35 37

MONEY

Cover: Thinkstock. Photos: Andorra Tourist Board, Getty, Thinkstock

LIVING

38-39

NEWS & SPORT

40-53

TRAVEL

55-76

FEATURES FRIGHT NIGHT Your guide to the spookiest Halloween events London has to offer

THOUGHT FOR FOOD

UP IN THE AIR

NEWS

LATE DEALS

BEST OF THE CUP

It time for the Rugby World Cup final. Here are the tournament highlights

TOP FIVE

62-63

TIPS & STUFF

64-65

SHORTBREAK

66 70-71

48 HOURS IN... OSLO CLASSIFIEDS

109-113

DESPERATELY SEEKING

114

The Experimental Food Society holds its annual spectacular this weekend

DIARY

HOTSHOTS

Enjoy travelling? We give you the lowdown on working for an airline

TENERIFE CALLING

Grab some sun and get some exercise on this majestic Canary Island

SNOW BUSINESS

A comprehensive rundown of the best snow this winter - all budgets catered for

8 TNTMAGAZINE.COM

EDITORIAL Editor Carol Driver Sub editor Jahn Vannisselroy Content editors: Acting Travel Laura Chubb Entertainment Alison Grinter News & sport Tom Sturrock Web Frankie Mullin Staff writer Clare Vooght Staff writer/editorial assistant Rebecca Kent

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Ever the player, Anastasia juggled three men at once

DESIGN AND PRODUCTION Head of design and production Jon Cooke Graphic design manager Justine Mackay Picture researcher Laila Pacheco DIGITAL & IT Head of digital marketing and development Syed Ahmad Social Media Coordinator Dan Thorne IT manager Stephen Dann SALES Commercial director David Alstin Sales manager Jaqui Ward Classified Ad Manager Matt Syder Sales executives Tyler Harrison | Eddie Clinton | Donovan Smith | Michael Fair Sales administrator Abby Nightingale MARKETING & EVENTS Marketing and events assistant Phoebe Cherrill ACCOUNTS Margaret Roberts | Suzanne Welsh TNT MULTIMEDIA LTD CEO Kevin Ellis Chairman Ken Hurst

Shhh... SECRET LONDON MOSCOW STATE CIRCUS

PUBLISHER TNT Multimedia Limited DISTRIBUTION Emblem Direct Ltd PRINTED BY Wyndeham Peterborough Limited NEWS AAP SAPA NZPA PICTURES Getty Images, TNT Images, Thinkstock TNT Magazine , 10 Greycoat Place, London, SW1P 1SB tntmagazine.com General enquiries Phone 020 7960 6008 Fax 020 7960 6977 Email enquiries@tntmagazine.com

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TNT Magazine is printed on paper from sustainable forests. There is no business connection between the proprietors of this magazine and TNT Ltd, the worldwide transportation group. Copyright here and abroad of all original materials is held by TNT Magazine. Reproduction in whole or part is forbidden, except with permission of the publishers. Registered as a newspaper at the Post Office.

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The Moscow Circus is one of the world’s most acclaimed, boasting a massive cast, including some of the most skilled performers, many of whom have never before appeared in the UK. It fuses classical circus skills with an eye-catching, contemporary presentation – there’s all the usual acrobatics and high-wire derring-do, but some of the contortions and feats of strength defy belief. If you like circuses, this is the one to go to. £10

moscowstatecircus.com

Ealing Common

THE MAGIC OF REALITY

PRIVATE EYE: FIRST 50 YEARS

INTERNATIONAL TECH SHOW

Spend an evening with Richard Dawkins, evolutionary biologist and one of the world’s most strident atheists, as he walks you through some of the territory covered in his new book, The Magic Of Reality. In this latest effort, a children’s book, Dawkins explains basic scientific principles.

For 50 years, Private Eye has employed a combination of brilliant satire and good oldfashioned muck-raking to lampoon the British establishment and its funniest, most famous covers, as well as other artwork from inside the magazine, are now on display. An audacious potted history of the past 50 years.

There are gadgets galore at this sprawling event, which is the UK’s premier technology get-together. No matter what you’re into – whether it’s computing, gaming, mobile, hardware, software or photography – you can sneak a glimpse of the future here and spend an afternoon ogling stuff you can’t afford.

October 19 Royal Albert Hall, Kensington Gore, SW7 2AP royalalberthall. com South Kensington

Until January 18 V&A Museum, Cromwell Rd, SW7 2RL vam.ac.uk South Kensington

October 21-23 ExCeL London, Royal Victoria Dock, E16 1XL excel-london. co.uk Canning Town

£30

FREE

£10

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Threesomes: even turtles have ‘em

CEO

in Search of someone who is super-smart and gets stuff done Location: Central London Salary: Competitive – medium term six figures Job Type: Full Time Job Sector: Management & Executive We are looking for someone who is super-smart, gets stuff done and is keen to progress and develop themselves

Type of Person WILDLIFE PHOTOGRAPHER OF THE YEAR Natural History Museum

This is one of the world’s big-ticket wildlife photography prizes, attracting dozens of captivating entries each year. You don’t have to be a photography buff to appreciate these remarkable images of the natural world. Indeed, the story attached to a photo is often as facinating as the picture itself. It opens this weekend and is certain to draw a crowd. £9

October 21-March 11 Natural History Museum, Cromwell Rd, SW7 5BD nhm.ac.uk eb South Kensington

BLOOMSBURY FESTIVAL

AFFORDABLE ART FAIR

This bustling, upmarket urban village puts its best foot forward with 150 different events that are sure to lure foodies, shopaholics and culture vultures into the picturesque heart of the capital. After you’ve had your fill of shopping and grazing, there’s a fantastic, rambling street party on the Sunday.

Trawl through Battersea Park for a rare bargain that really holds your flat together. Art might normally be out of your budget but there are plenty of good deals at this event, which involves about 120 galleries, selling everything from prints and paintings to sculpture and photography. Who knows what you might stumble upon?

October 21-23 Venues around Bloomsbury bloomsburyfestival.org.uk Russell Square

October 20-23 Battersea Park, Queenstown Rd, SW11 4NJ affordableartfair. co.uk Battersea Park

Photos: Marcel Guburn

FREE

£12

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Paula Radcliffe opens the new Nike store at Westfield

THOUSANDS WANTED TO WORK OLYMPICS Job seekers, students and volunteers are being urged to sign up for the tens of thousands of jobs created by the 2012 Olympics. Some 6000 staff and about 100,000 contractors will be paid to work at the Games. While some 70,000 volunteers will also be sought. In the next six months, thousands of contractor opportunities and 4000 jobs within LOCOG – the 2012 organisers – are expected to become available. For more information visit summerjobs.jobsforthegames.co.uk.

I don’t eat the legs through, that would be weird, Jonathan McGowan who has lived off roadkill for the past 30 years

E. COLI FOUND ON ‘1 IN 6’ MOBILES Londoners have the highest proportion of E. coli – which is transmitted in faeces – on their hands, and one in six mobile phones contain traces of it. Researchers from the London School of Hygiene & Tropical Medicine published the results after testing the hands and phones of people in 12 cities in Britain. Dr Ron Cutler, who led the study, said: “Take more care in the bathroom – washing your hands with soap is such a simple thing to do but there is no doubt it saves lives.”

ON THE TUBE

Oliver in mall obesity drive

Westfield Stratford to partner with chef Jamie’s Ministry of Food Westfield Stratford City is teaming up with Jamie Oliver’s Ministry of Food to promote healthy eating. In an attempt to lower the high obesity levels in Newham, the celebrity chef’s team will be offering basic skills training with demos and cookery sessions. The celebrity chef’s Ministry of Food initiative has already been successful worldwide, including in Australia. Myf Ryan, the mall’s general marketing manager, said: “The partnership was a natural fit to introduce communities across the country to great food at home.” Oliver said: “Ministry of Food Centres are so successful wherever they open and I’m delighted that Westfield will be helping us.” The announcement comes just four weeks after the opening of Westfield

Stratford – the largest urban shopping centre in Europe. So far, the £1.45bn mall has seen more than four million people pass through its doors. Some 30 million shoppers are expected to visit the centre in its first year. Noel Saunders, managing director of John Lewis, said the store had had a “tremendous” month. “The London 2012 Shop and amazing view of the Olympic Park have proved the biggest hit,” he added. Last week also saw the launch of the centre’s new Nike store, opened by Paula Radcliffe where she rallied support for her “history stands” initiative. The runner is campaigining against the International Association of Athletics Federations which says times set by female runners in mixed races will not count in the record books.

THIS WEEK IN LONDON...

THIS WEEK’S CLOSURES

CIRLE: No service DISTRICT: no service between Earl’s Court and Edgware Road on Saturday and no service between Wimbledon and Edgware Road on Sunday

H’SMITH & CITY: No service between Baker Street and Royal Oak

NORTHERN: No service between High

VICTORIA: No service all weekend. Replacement buses operate

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Daredevil: Jochen Schweizer

Photos: Getty; TNT

Barnet and Camden Town, southbound until around 8.30am on Monday and northbound until about 9am on Monday

The Vienna Tourist Board will be building the biggest structure ever erected in Trafalgar Square. Helping Londoners see “Vienna from a different angle”, the 21m-high wall will be a base for shows and challenges on Monday and Tuesday. A dramatic acrobatics performance, mixing art, sound and adventurous aerial displays, will play in front of Nelson’s Column. In between shows, visitors will have the chance to ‘stroll’ down the wall – face first – defying gravity through specially developed climbing harnesses. Participants will be led by Jochen Schweizer – who holds the record for the world’s highest bungy jump. The free event runs from 12.30pm to 8.30pm both days.

Feeling homesick? Just take a photo of yourself in front of the Hammersmith digital billboard, by the bus terminal, and upload it to kiwistogether.com. You could win a trip back to Aotearoa, courtesy of New Zealand newspapers. Or take a photo of yourself holding the kiwi newspaper page in the Wednesday 19th October edition of the Metro, for a second chance to win. (A London landmark in the background couldnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t hurt your chances either.) See website for Terms & Conditions. NAB7770_Kiwis_FP_TNT

Highs and lows: The Human Centipede is being screened on Halloween

Be very afraid ... The rush we get from being scared is similar to snorting a line of cocaine. We tell you where to get your next hit this Halloween WORDS CAROL DRIVER

It’s that time of year again – when it’s acceptable to dress like a slasher victim, watch horror films until you’re confused about what’s reality and what’s fantasy, and basically get involved in anything that scares you shitless. Yes, it’s Halloween. And it’s no longer about kids wearing masks trick-or-treating door-to-door. Us adults want a piece of the action, too. But what is it that draws us to such a macabre underworld? Why are we fascinated by the dark, the chilling and the psychologically disturbing? Dr Brendan Walker, the world’s only ‘thrill engineer’, believes he has the answer. While in our everyday lives, most ‘normal’ people go to great lengths to avoid putting themselves in dangerous situations and being scared, there’s something inherently exciting about facing danger. “It’s confronting your fears and surviving them which delivers this feeling of thrill, this euphoric rush,” Walker says. He explains that when we watch a horror movie, our bodies produce a chemical called cortisol – which usually happens when we’re stressed. But when the release comes 8

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– such as remembering a film is fictional or when a rollercoaster ride is over – we produce dopamine, which creates a “beautiful” sensation. A buzz. “It’s the release,” Walker says. “It’s the sense of elation or happiness that produces dopamine which creates a sense of pleasure. The closest drug to this is cocaine, which creates the same sensation. “It’s like an adrenaline rush, which is basically your body going into a high state of arousal. What you’re getting with a horror film are low levels of pleasure [throughout the movie], so the release and the reward can be much higher than, say, a rollercoaster [which delivers one big hit].” However, just like drug addicts, horror fans are always looking for their next hit. “You’re constantly seeking novel things to get the rush, this payback,” Walker says. If this sounds like you, you’ll have no problem sourcing your next hit in London. This Halloween, everyone wants a piece of the action – revellers can choose from the more light-hearted effort of clubs with amusing fancy dress themes to the more boundary-pushing,

disturbing events, such as the screening of cult movie The Human Centipede (P11). So if the thrill is similar to that achieved by taking drugs, does it mean peddlers of these events are similar to pushers? Simon Drake, who lives in the House of Magic in central London (see P11), is quite happy to take that title. “Metaphorically, my job is like a drug dealer – to get people in touch with their natural endorphins and adrenaline,” he says. “People enjoy being frightened. The goriest part of my show is when I put an 18-inch knife through my arm with lots of blood. People laugh more than they scream. When people are frightened or horrified, they tend to laugh – so long as it’s not done in horrible taste. “Having done horror for many years, it’s odd that people enjoy it, but they do. Horror movies are 90 minutes of quite cleverly calculated suspension and shock and people laugh because their body receives an injection of adrenaline. It’s a thrill, a rush, without taking drugs.” WANT ONE LAST HIT? WAYS TO CELEBRATE HALLOWEEN ››

Green faces. Scary

Join the London zombie walk

Remember to remove make-up before going to work

THE ROCKY HORROR PICTURE SHOW WEST END

MURDER MYSTERY CLAPHAM Always fancied yourself a bit of an Inspector Morse? Or a rival for Miss Marple? Well, now’s the time to put your skills to the test at this night of murderously horrific goings on. It kicks off at 7.30pm in the Blue Room, when a bunch of ghoulish characters – from Frankenstein to Dracula – get together. Then (shock! horror!) it all goes dark and ... well, you know the drill. Tickets include a three-course meal but must be booked by Oct 27. £35

It’s time to put your hands on your hips – and pull your knees in tight – while dressed as your favourite Rocky Horror character. Halloween just isn’t complete without singing along to the Time Warp with Susan Sarandon, Tim Curry and Richard O’Brian in this 1976 classic. And, lads, don’t forget the suspenders. £15

Oct 28-29 7 Leicester Place, WC2H 7BY princecharlescinema.com Leicester Square

SPOOKTACULAR @ THE ROOF GARDENS KENSINGTON A 30ft-high flame-thrower, a ‘tower of doom’ and members of the Thriller cast will be adding a touch of style at this exclusive venue for Halloween. Don fancy dress and you’ll get free entry between 9pm-10pm. Then spend the night dancing to the tunes of DJ Sam Londt, drinking cocktails and wandering the spectacular garden. FREE

Mon, Oct 31 The Avalon, 16 Balham Hill, SW12 9EB theavalon.co.uk Clapham South

Sat, Oct 29 99 Kensington High Street, W8 5SA roofgardens.virgin.net High St Kensington

IN YOUR DREAMS YOUR HOUSE/EVENT Halloween is all about dressing up, but there’s no point in doing this half-heartedly. Blackening your eyes or smudging lipstick around your mouth is so amateur. Instead, let this body-painting duo get to work on you, creating stunning designs which will make you the talk of the party. Choose to recreate Night Of The Living Dead on your face, or opt for something more romantic such as vine leaves painted down your body. Book illustrators Bryony Fripp and Madeline Griffiths – who do this at corporate level – and they’ll visit you at home before you brave the streets, or at the event where you intend to wow the crowds. £30+

All year inyour-dreams.com

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PROADANDA BRIXTON

TALES OF TERROR BANK

Shake your devilish ass all night long to the sounds of DJ Dan, The Postman, Andy Tokyo and Faith SFX (Plan B’s beatboxer) at this special ‘horrifying’ party complete with ghoulish decor. Scary.

Dress as your favourite dead movie star (how they’d look now) for a night of thrills. Miguel Migs will be performing a rare UK show in one of five dance rooms.

There’s nothing else quite like a decent ghost story to set the scene for Halloween. As darkness falls, the mischievous storytellers of 40 Winks will be getting together to host a night of Tales of Terror, aiming to startle, stagger and shock their guests with a selection of the best. Prepare to be taken to a land of fantastical horror, fearful dread and nervous trepidation. The ghostly tales will be served with a Corpse Reviver No2 cocktail with lashings of infused gin and a dash of absinthe. Before you’re sent off to brave the night alone with just a goodie bag for company, you’ll be treated to the melodious sounds of chanteuse Tricity Vogue and her ... ukulele. What else?

Who better to talk about horror films than Alice Cooper? As part of his Night Of Halloween UK Tour, and celebrating the release of his new album, Welcome 2 My Nightmare, Cooper will be taking to the stage of the BFI Southbank to divulge his passion for the horror movie genre. The rock, punk, metal, goth pioneer will also treat guests to clips from his favourite horror films, including Barbarella to Halloween.

Sat, Oct 29 Egg, 200 York Way, N7 9AP egglondon.net King’s Cross

Mon, Oct 31 The Royal Exchange, EC3V 3LR 40winks.org Bank

Fri, Oct 28 Belvedere Road, SE1 8X bfi.org.uk Waterloo/Embankment

£5

Sat, Oct 29 Electric Brixton, Town Hall Parade, SW2 SFX thepropaganda.com Brixton

HOLLYWOOD FOREVER KING’S CROSS £20+

£25

ALICE COOPER: WELCOME TO MY NIGHTMARE MOVIES SOUTH BANK £13+

ANGELS FANCY DRESS COVENT GARDEN

SIMON DRAKE’S HOUSE OF MAGIC SECRET LOCATION

Chucking a black sack over your head and making holes for eyes doesn’t really cut it on the creative front. If you’re useless with a needle and thread, let the experts get your togs sorted. This store has been running since the 19th century, initially kitting out actors. Today, you’ll find anything from saucy devils to Obi-Wan Kenobi – and every accessory in between. Prices start at £3, and if you want to look the dog’s, you can spend up £200. Be prepared to queue to get in the store at this time of year, or order early online.

If you search on Google for the location of the House of Magic, there are only four options in the results – all of which are wrong. Find out for yourself where this permanently themed 4000-sq-ft Victorian mansion is hidden away. For this special evening, watch Simon Drake’s awardwinning magic show, tour the Haunted Cellar and have your fortune told by the Whispering Chair. The house – which is bursting with magical paraphernalia and really does have to be seen – is the only one of its kind in the UK. £45+

£3+

Open Mon-Sat 119 Shaftesbury Ave, WC2H 8AE fancydress.com Leicester Square

THE HORNY HOUSE OF HORROR! CITY OF LONDON This is organised by ArtWank, which aims to “stir debate among you dashing modern people about the nature of human sexuality”. Foul nurse Roxy Velvet will be putting on a gratuitous performance after which you can sit back and enjoy films which blur the lines between sex and violence. Definitely not for weaklings. £8+

Wed, Oct 26 Horse Hospital, Colonnade, WC1N 1JD artwank.weebly.com Russell Square

BELLE EPOQUE KING’S CROSS Step back in time to the hedonistic days of 19th-century Paris for some bohemian randomness. Inspired by the haunts of Toulouse Lautrec and his Impressionist mates, this event boasts bizarre acts, dark circus performers and absinthe-fuelled fun.

Thurs, Oct 27 Unknown houseofmagic.co.uk

EXTREME SCARE – HUMAN CENTIPEDE LONDON BRIDGE

£23

POTTY MOUTH SHOREDITCH Prepare for your make-up to run as you dance the night away to some face-melting beats. The ‘electro, disko and bad-language’ event kicks of with sets from US DJ Danny Daze, Clive Henry and Martin Dawson at Village Underground. Then continue to throw shapes ‘til the small hours at a secret location. ‘Citing. Photos: Dan Kitwood, Getty

£13+

Fri, Oct 28 Village Underground, 54 Holywell St, EC2A 3PQ myspace.com/pottymouthdisco Liverpool St

Sat, Oct 29 Grand Hall, Euston Rd, NW1 2DB belleepoqueparty.com King’s Cross St Pancras

ZOMBIE WALK PUB CRAWL This is your chance to join the capital’s undead – don’t pretend you haven’t always wanted to – and wander the streets in a rigor mortis paced pub crawl. In case it wasn’t obvious, you have to dress as a zombie. FREE

Sat, Oct 29 Waxy O’Connors, W1D 6DD Leicester Square

You’ve heard about its cult following, now you have the chance to see The Human Centipede this Halloween. Director Tom Six has teamed up with The London Bridge Experience and London Tombs to recreate horrific scenes from the movie. As part of its PhoboPhobia programme, ‘After Dark Extreme Scare – The Human Centipede’ definitely isn’t for those with a queasy disposition. For those not aware, the film features a mad doctor who kidnaps and mutilates tourists so he can turn them into a human centipede. The sequel has been banned in Britain, having been labelled the “sickest movie of all time”. You’ve been warned. £23

Oct 27-31 2-4 Tooley Street, SE1 2PF thelondonbridgeexperience.com London Bridge

A DANSE MACABRE WATERLOO This is one of two Halloween events hosted by The Last Tuesday Society (the other is The Masked Ball the following night). Expect nakedness, a soundtrack from The London Gay Symphony Orchestra and the unexpected. The fancy dress theme is ‘the beautiful and the damned’ and partygoers dress to impress. Head there an hour early to learn how to waltz, swing or pole ‘danse’. £30+

Fri, Oct 28 The Coronet Theatre, 28 New Kent Road, SE1 6TJ thelasttuesdaysociety.org Waterloo

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MYLONDON

JASON WELCH CO-FOUNDER OF ELEVEN HAIR What baffles me about London is ... nothing really. I have lived here for 18 years and I think it’s a remarkably straightforward city. I don’t understand people who live here and moan about London all the time, if you don’t like it or find it hard, move somewhere else. London’s best-kept secret is The Chanteroy in Southfields; no one would expect a French deli in the middle of Southfields. It’s near the Tube and doesn’t look much from the outside but sells incredible patisserie and other French delicacies. When I want to chill out I go to the Earl Spencer, again in Southfields. It’s an unpretentious gastro pub where they serve good beers and fantastic food. It’s a great chill-out spot and totally different to Mayfair where I work, which is why I go there to relax. The most interesting person I’ve met is called Anne Wiggins – a client who became a friend. She works for the UN and is often in Geneva or travelling so always has great stories. She is an economist but also an interior designer and is just launching a range of ethically produced silk pyjamas. Anne is a Buddhist and apparently silk worm aren’t treated very well in regular manufacturing practices – who knew!? My favourite place for a drink is Soho House. I love it. For when I’m hungover in London I go for a McDonald’s strawberry milkshake. Let’s face it, you’re never far from a branch anywhere in London.

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What gets me up in the morning? My first client of the day! If I didn’t work I’d find it hard to throw off the duvet and get into the shower every day. My perfect weekend would be simply hanging out with friends – because I’m a hairdresser, I usually work weekends. The last naughty thing I did was drive up a one way street in the City. I didn’t notice the sign but soon noticed the cars coming straight at me! Five words that sum up London ... I. Love. London. So. Much. eleven-hair.com

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THE COCK AND HEN

[Caption]

PUB THE SCENE As the word ‘pub’ is derived from the term ‘public house’, ideally, a good pub should almost be an extension of your own home. The Cock and Hen fits that bill nicely. Comfort is provided in spades: there’s plenty of space, large tables, booth seating and a warm atmosphere – thanks to the large amounts of polished wood and baroque wallpaper and to the friendly staff. Lighting from Victorian furnishings provides a soft glow – it’s the sort of place that invites hanging out on a chilly winter’s day. There’s wi-fi, a real fire and a huge beer garden. A community feel prevails, with the pub often holding poker evenings and other social events, although it can get a bit full when Chelsea has a home match. Any other time of the week is perfect. THE GRUB All produce is free-range. Try the chicken burger marinated in special Thai sauce served with homemade, skin-on, hand-cut chips. The grilled haddock, with Mediterranean vegetable salad, is also worth a try. BEHIND THE BAR A full range of beer – including a daily guest beer – and a decent wine list. The friendly staff are more than happy to recommend a bottle to complement your meal. BILL PLEASE Beers from £3.60; wine from £3.70 a glass, £15.25 a bottle; spirits £2.50. VERDICT The perfect hangout if winter is inducing cabin fever. JAHN VANNISSELROY

360 North End Rd, Fulham, SW6 1LY

3 OF THE BEST INSTITUTIONS

youngs.co.uk

Fulham Broadway

THE CRITERION

THE RITZ

Attached to the theatre with the same name in Piccadilly Circus, this place has been serving beautiful British cuisine with a French and Italian twist in an exceedingly plush, neoByzantine setting since 1874.

The quintessential place to hit up for an English afternoon tea. Or wile away an evening in The Restaurant, being pampered with champers and the richest food imaginable. Don’t forget a cheese plate.

criterionrestaurant.com

theritzlondon.com

THIS WEEK

THE DINING ROOM AT THE GORING Still going strong, the Goring has been run by the same family for 101 years. The menu boasts “proper British cuisine” and both the food and decor retains its Edwardian character. thegoring.com

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Take a sip: wine for the penny wise

CHERRY GOODNESS Jim Beam has strayed away from its traditional bourbon and created the mighty (girly) Red Stag. The four-yearold whiskey is infused with black cherry to make a sweeter, fruitier version of the spirit. It works well with a coke mixer or as a Brass Buck – made with ice, ginger ale and a squeeze of lime. It costs £21.75 a bottle and will be stocked in major supermarkets and bars across the country. jimbeam.com/red-stag

LIGHT UP YOUR LIFE To celebrate Diwali, the Indian festival of lights, the Cinnamon Kitchen is launching a special menu. For £45 per head, dine on a range of spiced treats including tandoori king prawns, grilled partridge, roasted rack of lamb, Bombay spiced vegetables and a creamy saffron malai hawa dessert. This hearty spread will be available from October 17-22 and if you’re looking to celebrate into the evening, there’ll be cocktails and Bollywood dancers on October 18, priced at £35, and palm readings, henna tattoos and DJs on October 22, costing £10. cinnamon-kitchen.com

GIZZI LOVES MOVEMBER In support of Movember (the moustache-growing male cancer charity), Gizzi Erskine has created the Gizz-Mo hamburger. For £8.25, you’ll be served a six-ounce beef patty with a welsh rarebit topping. Movember gets 50p from each burger, and anyone raising more than £25 for the charity will get their Gizz-Mo for free. Start growing those ‘taches now. byronhamburgers.com

BISTRO DU VIN French THE SCENE A dining outpost of the chic hotel chain Hotel Du Vin, this upmarket, wood-panelled French bistro is vast, but, as the evening rolls on, it fills with the chatter of diners. An army of unpretentious waiting staff, sommeliers and managers breezes between tables and the open kitchen. A friendly expert ushers us into a refrigerated, glass-walled recess for charcuterie and cheese and imparts some knowledge, adding a stroke of entertainment to our evening. Prices here are on the wrong side of affordable, but choose your dishes carefully and you can avoid a blowout. THE GRUB My steak tartare is a piquant ball of mouth-watering meat, finely spiced and a little tart on the tongue. My friend is pleased with her slice of duck terrine. She’s delighted it tastes nothing like cat food – there’s always the risk, apparently. My main of halibut is beautifully cooked with a crisp skin, but is let down by a fatty layer. My pal is a more satisfied with her rabbit; the meat falls tenderly off the bone and its gamey flavour is tempered with a sweet marinade. We plump for a white chocolate cheesecake, but even the sweetest tooth might be turned off by the heavy slab of dark chocolate on top. Because it would be rude not to, we finish with a delectable selection of cheeses served on a rustic board. I want to know exactly what they are, but by this point we can’t pin down any waiting staff to tell us. A quick look at the menu reveals we have six seasonal, artisan cheeses from La Cave à Fromage, including goats cheese, stilton and the venue’s bespoke ‘De Vin’ style, a semi-soft cow’s cheese.

A behind-the-glass dispenser allows us each to have a glass of wine, a bottle of which would have been beyond our means. I drink a bold, almost syrupy Brunello di Montalcino Riserva Sesti, while my friend sips on an complex Tuscan Sassicaia – heaven. BILL PLEASE Starters £4.95-£20; mains £11.95-£60; wines by the glass £4-£85. VERDICT The waiters became slack and by the end of the evening, we felt invisible. A shame, since it could have ended so much better. REBECCA KENT BEHIND THE BAR

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@TNT GET IT OFF YOUR TEXT

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LETTER OF THE WEEK

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81707*

West Ham have denied rumours they have found a new site for next season. Dale Farm is still occupied.

Georgie My mate offered me 50 quid if I did a bungee jump. I wasn’t falling for that.

Abu Simple Why the fuss over steve jobs? He simply made a gadget that satisfies our desire to sit on the net all day. Such a gd thing?

Des Danger I’ve never been able to keep a girlfriend. Guess I’ve got the ex factor.

Eunuch Horn Looking 4wd to the new series of ‘The only way is dalston’. It’s about time London’s hipsters had their own show.

Charlie Bingle I met a transvestite from Greater Manchester. He had a Wigan address.

Bianca those euro millions winners appearing in the media - why? If I won, I’d buy the daily mail – just so I could close it down.

Pieter I drink to forget... which can take forever when you’rE an elephant

EMAIL YOUR THOUGHTS TO LETTERS@TNTMAGAZINE.COM NO GLAMOUR HERE RE: Sarah Harding checking to rehab. I would take those who think massive drug taking is something that brings on a ‘cool’ tag’ to another hospital where people are being rushed in from OD’ing. Where others lay flatlined due to their hearts stopping due to the drugs that earlier were like racing car drivers speeding through their veins, making them go ‘wow’ for a moment and next going “Fucking hell, I’m dying!” If that doesn’t wake certain people up – seeing such sadness and pain within another human being – then I truly wouldn’t know what would. Christian Belucky, via Facebook

Abu Simple My wife thinks our sex life has got boring and I’m easily distracted, Oh well better get back to it I suppose.

* Messages cost 25p each + standard network rate. 18+ bill payers only. Send STOP to end. Number may show on bill. A2B 08700460138

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I believe in free speech, including for football fans to chant whatever they like. I can assure Tom Sturrock (TNT 1468) that women and children are just as crude as men. Why should all entertainment have to be

geared to “mum, dad and the kids”? When it comes to sledging, anything goes. This includes racist, sexist, homophobic, sick or ‘offensive’ chants. If you can’t let off steam at a match, when can you? Mark Taha, via email

DRESS SENSE Mary Portas kind of had a point when she had a dig at Kate Middleton’s fashion sense but it really depends on your definition of fashion – to readers of Heat Kate M is definitely a fashion icon, but to fashionistas she isn’t at all. Simon Bradbury, via Facebook

WALL EYES People need to get over it when Banksy’s work is covered up. It is graffiti after all. Even the man himself says it’s not meant to last forever. Evie, Pimlico WORLD CUP /52 HIT THE SNOW/72

Books are good things; they impart knowledge, stimulate thought and, as well as entertaining, help us understand the world. It’s sad libraries such as those in Brentford are going to close as part of the Big Society measures. If governments can’t afford to run them, surely there are rich people out there who could help. This society, now more than ever, needs people to have access tools of education. When did Cameron and co decide literacy and learning were luxurious commodities? Dave Arnold, via email Dave wins a three-day tour of Ireland with Shamrocker shamrockeradventures.com

YOUR TWEETS Tweet us @tntmagazine @ExcessBaggageCo: What a lovely night at the Shaka Zulu organised by @tntmagazine, time to get home and hit the bed though :) @kellymaree: #makesmelaugh when girls shave their eyebrows and draw them back on. @akyolyasemin: do you know what the #iPhone said to the #Blackberry? … ”iWork”

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Christopher J. Rea: Who really gives a shite if Lieb Shriver cheated on Naomi Watts or not ...(media outlets excluded!!!) Trinibwoy Rog: ‘Hugh FearnleyWhittingstall says eating dog is OK.’ That’s normal in Korean culture. Got invited once. Told them I’ll stick to curry goat lol Suzette La Pierre: re Jeremy Kyle. Granted, he’s a twat, but I wouldn’t go as far as calling him the UK’s most hated man

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THE SLUG @ WIMBLEDON London Saturday, October 8 Photos by: Nicola Bellinfantie/ TNT Images

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ALISON GRINTER NOTE FROM MUSIC EDITOR Anyone who knows me will be familiar with my raging antipathy for Oasis and the Gallagher brothers. But something Noel did this week endeared him to me. Or rather, something his solo album is about to do. According to preorder sales from Amazon.co.uk, Noel’s debut Noel Gallagher’s High Flying Birds is currently 13 per cent ahead of X Factor dullard Matt Cardle’s debut album. In other words, Noel is on track to keep Cardle from the number one spot in the album charts. Woohoo! This is brilliant news (for I despise X Factor even more than Noel ‘n’ Liam) and comes just as Cardle launches a ridiculous credibility offensive stating he had to “massively compromise” himself to win last year’s X Factor and wasn’t best pleased about singing Katy Perry songs. Silly twat. What did he think he was auditioning for? Wild Beasts? Bon Iver? You don’t go on X Factor if you want a cutting-edge career. Give me Noel any day.

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FEIST London Palladium OCT 17 | DOORS AT 7PM | £20-£30

Like headlights on a dark night, Leslie Feist seemed to come out of nowhere with her slow-burn hit of an album, The Reminder, in 2007. Spawning such gorgeously whimsical tracks as 1234 and Mushaboom, the critically adored LP instantly established Feist as a creative force to be reckoned with, while her quirky DIY videos only added to her kooky appeal. In fact, the Canadian singer-songwriter had been toiling behind the scenes for some years; first as a collaborator on Peaches’s confronting electroclash opus Teaches Of Peaches in 2000 and then as a member of Canadian indie rock collective The Broken Social Scene. She had already released two studio albums too, but it was her collaborative efforts with cult muso Chilly Gonzales and Manu Chao’s Renaud Letang that really allowed her to develop her signature style and break into the mainstream. On release, The Reminder debuted at number two in Canada and at number 16 on the US Billboard charts. But the album that made her almost killed off her creativity – Feist has since admitted in interviews that the relentless touring she did for The Reminder nearly burnt her out. Little wonder then that it has taken her four years to return with a follow up. Metals is a lot sparer than its predecessor but nevertheless showcases Feist’s impeccable ear for a tune or a beautiful rhyming couplet (check out first single, How Come You Never Go There). This is her first UK show in three years. Enjoy! 8 Argyll Street, W1F 7TF

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NEW BAND

BON IVER GIG OCT 23-24. 7PM £27.50

US songsmith Justin Vernon is living proof that substance will triumph over style every time (X Factor hopefuls take note!) Vernon, who looks like a hobo but makes sublime indie folk with his band Bon Iver, won the hearts of critics and fans with his faultless For Emma, Forever Ago in 2008. He returns to plug his self-titled follow up.

Photos: Jack Bevan, Getty

Hammersmith Apollo Queen Caroline St, W6 9QH venues.meanfiddler.com Hammersmith

MR SCRUFF

FLYING LOTUS

CLUB

SAT, OCT 22. 9PM-3AM £15

SAT, OCT 22. FROM 7PM £25

A product of Manchester’s mid Nineties club scene, Andy Carthy AKA Mr Scruff has made a feature of mixing up genres to create a unique dance experience. This week he’ll be at the controls for six hours, serving up his usual melting pot of jazz, soul, hip hop, funk, disco, deep house, reggae, dubstep, afrobeat and Latin.

This rare treat sees groundbreaking Californian multi-genre music producer and laptop musician Flying Lotus, (real name Steven Ellison) bring his new live show to the UK for the first time. The event is a collaboration with the hugely celebrated visual label ANTIVJ so expect a sight for sore eyes, as well as an earfull.

Koko 1a Camden High St, NW1 7JE koko.uk.com Mornington Crescent

Roundhouse Chalks Farm Rd, NW1 8EH roundhouse.org.uk Chalk Farm

THE CAT EMPIRE

FABRIC 12TH BIRTHDAY WEEKENDER

BRUNO MARS

GIG

CLUB

GIG

OCT 20-21. £22.50

OCT 21-22. 10PM-6AM FROM £15

OCT 23-24. 7PM £27.50

For 10 years Melbourne’s The Cat Empire have been inciting fans to dance with an eclectic mix of indie, jazz, rock, reggae and Latin influences. Their onstage improv means no song is ever the same, so every gig is an original sonic excursion. They’ll be celebrating ten years in She Bu, with a second show at Brixton Academy on Oct 21.

Since opening in 1999, Fabric has been at the forefront of London’s dance scene with its bleeding-edge clubnights and vibrating dancefloor. For their 12th birthday the club is pulling out all the stops with a bumper weekend of live and DJ performances from the likes of Space Dimension Controller (above) and more.

Hawaiian-born Bruno Mars kicked off his career at the age of four as an Elvis impersonator. Now a bona fide crooner in his own right, he’s responsible for some of music’s most chartfriendly moments with tunes like Just the Way You Are, Grenade and The Lazy Song. He’ll be making the ladeez swoon in Brixton this week.

Shepherd’s Bush Empire W11 8QE o2shepherdsbushempire.co.uk Shepherd’s Bush

Fabric 77a Charterhouse St, EC1M 3HN. From £15 fabriclondon.com Farringdon

Brixton Academy 211 Stockwell Rd, SW9 9SL o2academybrixton.co.uk Brixton

TROPHY WIFE THE BUZZ SO FAR With two acclaimed singles and support slots with the likes of Foals and Two Door Cinema Club under their belts, Oxford trio Trophy Wife are ready to take their music to the next level with the release of their debut EP, Bruxism. Comprising five songs, helmed by five different producers – including Foals’ Yannis Philippakis – it’s inspired by the various sleep disorders suffered by the band members – and yes, that includes bruxism, the involuntary grinding of one’s teeth. Their lustrous sound, exploring the space between wakefulness and sleep, is no less intriguing. THE CRITICS SAY “Beautifully spare, minimalistic indie.” Sunday Times THE PLUG Debut EP Bruxism out Oct 17 on Blessing Force.

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CLUBLISTINGS MONDAY 17 Cuban Hideaway DJ Rich plays Latin, house, funk and R‘n’B. The Hideaway, Stanthorpe Rd, SW16 2ED (020 8835 7070). 9.40pm-late. £5.

Yoyo Seb Chew and Leo Greenslade spin hip-hop, dubstep, garage and grime. Notting Hill Arts Club, Notting Hill Gate, W11 3JQ (020 7460 4459). 7.30pm-2am. £7, £5 before 11pm.

BOOK NOW!

Happy Monday Chill-out anthems courtesy of the residents. Thirst, Greek St, W1D 3DR (020 7437 1977). 5pm-3am. £3, free before 10pm.

FRIDAY 21 Bleed Presents... Blackest Ever Black Electronica and techno from Regis and Raime, plus Cut Hands perform live. The Basing House, Kingsland Rd, E2 8AA (020 7688 0339). 10pm-4am. £10.

Hard Core Salsa DJ Mario plays mambo and salsa, plus dance lessons. Salsa!, Charing Cross Rd, WC2H 0JG (020 7379 3277). 6pm-2am, last adm 1am. £4, free before 9pm. I Love Mondays DJ Victor spins commercial dance, disco, pop, garage, R‘n’B and funky house. Moonlighting, Greek St, W1D 4DR (020 7437 5782/cc 020 7287 3727). 10pm-3.30am. £5, NUS £1.50. The Joiners Arms: Soulful Sounds DJ Alex spins soul and funk. Joiners Arms, Hackney Rd, E2 7QL (020 7739 9397). 5pm-11pm. £2.50. Monday Midnight Mass Nicos and Shane spin indie and rock. 12 Bar Club, Denmark Place, WC2H 8NL (020 7240 2622). 11pm-3am. £3. Popcorn Jonesey, Jamie Hammond, Harvey Adam, Terry T Rex and spin dance, electro, R‘n’B, pop and hip-hop. Heaven, Charing Cross Arches, Villiers St, WC2N 6NG (020 7930 2020). 11pm-5.30am. £8. Rehab DJs Val, Satoko, Zoe Demonettes, Joe, Saral and Hale supply indie, electro and pop. The Roxy, Rathbone Place, W1T 1HJ (020 7255 1098). 10pm-3am. £5, NUS/w/flyer £3, £1 before 10.30pm.

TUESDAY 18

Cellardoor DJ Farouk spins Latin, funk and soul. Gigalum, Cavendish Parade, Clapham Common South Side, SW4 9DW (020 8772 0303). 7pm-midnight. Free.

BRIDESMAIDS NIGHT Club de Fromage at Islington Academy, November 12. £6.50 Adv. To celebrate the release of Bridesmaids on DVD (Nov 14) Club de Fromage will be hosting a night of cheesy fun with a “wedding” fancy dress theme. N1 0PS

ClubDeFromage.com

WEDNESDAY 19 Bombay Bicycle Club Official Aftershow Party The band spins indie and electro. Jamm, Brixton Rd, SW9 6LH (020 7346 8920/ cc 020 7274 5537). 8pm-4am. £10. Cheapskates Old school hip-hop, electro and disco courtesy of DJ Downfall. Moonlighting, Greek St, W1D 4DR (020 7437 5782/cc 020 7287 3727). 9pm-3.30am. £6.50, NUS £5.50, w/flyer £4.50. Dance Nights Princess Karina and DJ Gary Baldi spin dance hits. EC3 Live, Crosswall, EC3N 2JY (020 7488 1766). 11.30pm-3am. £10.

Angel

XXL Mid Week House and pop courtesy of resident DJs Joe Egg and Alex Logan. Arcadia, Southwark St, SE1 1RU (020 7403 9643). 10pm-3am. £3, mems free.

THURSDAY 20 The After Work Jam TC Fords, Invasion Crew. Jag 1 Sound and Patrick J supply R‘n’B, dancehall, soca and funk. Euphoriom, High St, W3 6NG (020 8993 2915). 8pm-late. £5, free before 11pm. C’est La Vie DJ Colin Francis plays house and commercial dance classics. Embassy, Old Burlington St, W1S 3AP (020 7851 0956). 10pm3am. £20, ladies free before 11.30pm.

Dirty Fuxx DJ Will Manning spin house, techno, electro, hip-hop, R‘n’B, dubstep and drum‘n’bass. The Hoxton Pony, Curtain Rd, EC2A 3AH (020 7613 2844). 9pm1am. £5, NUS £3, free before 9pm.

Diffrent Strokes Manny Norte, Phatcatz, Maintain, CJ I DJ, Lonyo and MOBO Award winner and Kiss FM DJ Manny Norte play neo soul, 1980s pop, US house, funk and R‘n’B. Cherryjam, Porchester Rd, W2 6ET (020 7727 9950). 9pm-2am. £10, £5 before 11pm.

Forca Brasil DJ Fred spins salsa, samba and Latin tunes, plus live bands. Salsa!, Charing Cross Rd, WC2H 0JG (020 7379 3277). 6pm-2am, last adm 1am. £4, free before 9pm.

Filthy Habits Student Night DJs play chart hits from the 1980s, 90s and now. The Roxy, Rathbone Place, W1T 1HJ (020 7255 1098). 8.30pm-3am. £5, NUS £3.

Everything Taboo DJ Andrew Elmore plays retro electro-pop and acid disco. The Shadow Lounge, Brewer St, W1F 0RF (020 7287 7988). 10pm-3am. £5, free before midnight.

Latino Sound DJ Kirisis and CLI play R‘n’B, hip-hop and dance. Sound, Leicester Sq, WC2H 7NA (0333 240 1010). 9pm-late. £5-£10.

Majestic Vibe DJ El Moreno spins funky house, R‘n’B and old skool classics. Diu, Greek St, W1D 4DJ (020 7025 7844). 9pm-3am. £5.

OMFG! DJs Lady Lloyd, Joshyou Are and Niyi Maximus Crown play pop, disco and electro, with host Queen B Munroe Bergdorf. The Shadow Lounge, Brewer St, W1F 0RF (020 7287 7988). 10pm-3am. £5, free before 11pm.

N*A*S*I*N SoniX, Brahim and Punk Gareth play punk, rock, metal and ska. The Borderline, Orange Yard, Manette St, W1D 4JB (0870 060 3777/ cc 0871 231 0842). 11pm-3am. £5, w/flyer £4, NUS £3, mems £2.

Gravity House, R‘n’B and commercial pop across three rooms, from residents including Leandro Kloppel, Jon Byrne, Jamie Head, The Oli and Sharp Boys. Fire, South Lambeth Rd, SW8 1UQ (020 7582 9890). midnight-8am. £10, w/flyer £8, w/flyer £6 before 3am.

Panic! Max, Gaz and That Perfect Fumble play indie, electro and post-punk. The Roxy, Rathbone Place, W1T 1HJ (020 7255 1098). 10pm-3am. £5, w/flyer/NUS £3.

Push It Good DJ TBX spins old skool hip-hop, funk, soul and dancehall. The Silver Bullet, Station Place, N4 2DH (020 7619 3639). 10pm-3am. £3.

Stupid Tuesday Funky and soulful house, disco and pop. Thirst, Greek St, W1D 3DR (020 7437 1977). 5pm-3am. £3, free before 10pm.

Roda De Samba Ulisses Bezerra and Groupo So Kem Eh spin Latin and samba beats. Guanabara, Parker St, WC2B 5PW (020 7242 8600). 5pm-late. £5.

White Heat DJs Matty, Olly and Marcus play electro, techno and indie, plus The Blood Arm perform live. Madame Jojo’s, Brewer St, W1F 0SE (020 7734 3040). 8pm-3am. £6, adv £4 & £5.

Trannyshack Miss Dusty O, Tasty Tim and Lady Lloyd spin commercial dance and pop. Madame Jojo’s, Brewer St, W1F 0SE (020 7734 3040). 10pm-3am. £6, w/flyer £3, free before midnight.

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Deepo Ivaylo, Olanski, Patrick Turner, Asad Rizvi and Fresh Tee supply house and deep bass. The LightBox, South Lambeth Place, SW8 1SP (020 7434 1113). 10pm-6am. £15, concs £10.

QueerlyOut DJ Robby D spins commercial dance, pop and R‘n’B. Escape Bar, Brewer St, W1F 0SU (020 7734 3040). 9pm-3am. £5, mems £3. Roller Disco Funk and disco for a wheeled audience. Renaissance Rooms, opposite Arch 8, Arches, Miles St, SW8 1RZ (0844 736 5375). 8pmmidnight. £10, £7.50 skate hire. Swag Deadboy, French Fries, Synamatix, ZTG, Bare Girls and Sploshhh spin house, drum‘n’bass, hip-hop and R ‘n’ B. The Rhythm Factory, Whitechapel Rd, E1 1EW (020 7375 3774). 9pm-3am. £7, £6 before 10pm, NUS £5.

Favela Blockparty DJs Limao and Cae Traven play Brazilian funk, Latin, house, R‘n’B and hip-hop, plus Kita Steuer & Samba Soul Transatlantico perform live. Guanabara, Parker St, WC2B 5PW (020 7242 8600). 5pm-2.30am. £10, free before 9pm. Fever Fridays DJ Dean Scorch spins house, electro and chart hits. Tuatara, Kings Rd, SW3 4PA (020 7351 5521/ cc 020 7351 5614). 10pm-3am. gents £15, £10 before 11.30pm, ladies £10. The Gallery Markus Schulz, Marco V, Richard Durand, John Askew, TDUK, Manuel De La Mare, Mark Dickson & Mike Mac, Mark Derry & Adam Neenan, Daves Reeves, Sick Vibes and Dirty Laundry spin techno, electro and house. The Ministry Of Sound, Gaunt St, SE1 6DP (0870 060 0010). 10.30pm-6am. £13. Latin Fever Latin tracks from resident DJ Jorge. Salsa!, Charing Cross Rd, WC2H 0JG (020 7379 3277). 6pm-2am, last adm 1am. £10, £8 before 11pm, £4 before 9pm, £2 before 8pm. One Kiss DJs Krisis and Melody Kane spin house, mash-ups, electro, dance anthems, R‘n’B, hip-hop and commercial dance. One, Leicester Sq, WC2H 7NA (020 7437 0453). 10pm-3am. £10, £5 before 11pm, ladies free before 11.30pm. Play: Love Hate DJ EZ, Sticky, Oliver Rant, Senor Floss, NotNice DJs, Joe & Will Ask?, Citizen, Harry James, Rick Torres, John Green and Ritson spin garage, dubstep, drum‘n’bass house and techno. Egg, York Way, N7 9AX (020 7871 7111). 10pm-6am. £15, £10 before 12.30am, NUS £7, NUS £5 before 12.30am. Roots Dance Blackboard Jungle DJs, Jah Sufferer Sound DJs and Aba-Shanti-I spin jungle, dub, reggae and drum‘n’bass. The Scala, Pentonville Rd, N1 9NL (020 7833 2022/ cc 0844 477 1000). 10pm-6am. £12.

SATURDAY 22 BBM Presents The Loose Cannons provide house and electro. The Hoxton Pony, Curtain Rd, EC2A 3AH (020 7613 2844). 8pm-2am. £10, guestlist £7 before 11pm, free before 9pm.

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Church Of Trance DJs spin trance. Gigalum, Cavendish Parade, Clapham Common South Side, SW4 9DW (020 8772 0303). 7pm-late. Free. Flying Lotus The Californian producer and laptop musician plays a live electronic and experimental hip-hop show, in collaboration with Anti VJ. Roundhouse, Chalk Farm Rd, NW1 8EH (0844 482 8008). 7pm-late. £22.50 & £25. Inferno Andrew Elmore spins funk, house and dance. The Shadow Lounge, Brewer St, W1F 0RF (020 7287 7988). 10pm-3am. £10, free before 11pm. Latin Passion Victor Hugo & The Mambo Boys and Jorge Andre play Latin beats. Salsa!, Charing Cross Rd, WC2H 0JG (020 7379 3277). 6pm2am, last adm 1am. £10, £8 before 11pm, £4 before 9pm, £2 before 8pm. The Mission: Official AfterParty An indie and rock DJ set from Wayne Hussey. Jamm, Brixton Rd, SW9 6LH (020 7346 8920/ cc 020 7274 5537). 8pm-5am. £10. The New Untouchables Present Crossfire DJs spin Northern Soul in the main room and mod and R‘n’B sounds in room two, plus live music from psychedelic rock band Jul. 229 The Venue, Great Portland St, W1W 5PW (020 7323 7229). 9pm-6am. £15. Rock Sin Subtitulos Mega Spanish DJs spin Spanish chart and pop, plus a live performance from Maldita Nerea. The Scala, Pentonville Rd, N1 9NL (020 7833 2022/ cc 0844 477 1000). 8pm-6am. £20. Shake It House, techno and electro courtesy of Reboot, Layo&Bushwacka! and Femi B. Village Underground, Holywell Ln, EC2A 3PQ (020 7422 7505). 10pm-7am. £17.

SUNDAY 23 Can’t Stop Won’t Stop Mark Radford, Maxwell Van Morrison and Edwards Lee spin house and techno. Club Aquarium, Old St, EC1V 9DD (020 7251 6136). 11pm-6am. £15, £10 before midnight, ladies free before midnight. Momentum Mike Peters, PBS & Sam Wyle and Smashbox spin tech-house, progressive house and techno. Gigalum, Cavendish Parade, Clapham Common South Side, SW4 9DW (020 8772 0303). 4pm-11pm. Free. Oxjam Drum‘n’bass, dubstep, hip-hop, indie, folk and ska from Elephino, Hang The DJ, Ayah Marar and Logistics. Plan B, Brixton Rd, SW9 7AY (020 7737 7372). 7pm-midnight. £10, adv £7. Roller Motion The residents play R‘n’B, hip-hop, house, electro, soul and funk. Renaissance Rooms, opposite Arch 8, Arches, Miles St, SW8 1RZ (0844 736 5375). 7pm-midnight. £12.50, £9 w/c own skates. Showtime DJ F-Sound spins house, electro, R‘n’B and dance anthems. One, Leicester Sq, WC2H 7NA (020 7437 0453). 10pm-3am. £11, £5 before 11pm, ladies free before 11.30pm.

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MONDAY 17

Skepta, Tempa T, Logan Sama Hip-hop and grime by the Londonbased MC. O2 Academy Islington, Parkfield St, N1 0PS (020 7288 4400/ cc 0844 477 2000). £12.

Feist The Canadian singersongwriter performs elemental alt pop and contemporary folk balladry from her fifth album, Metals, as well as her previous gold-selling record, The Reminder. London Palladium, Argyll St, W1F 7TF (0844 412 2704). £20-£30.

Yann Tiersen, Lanterns On The Lake Indie-rock and avant-garde pop from the French singersongwriter. Roundhouse, Chalk Farm Rd, NW1 8EH (0844 482 8008). £17.

Hot Club Of Boisdale Parisian swing inspired by Stephane Grappelli and Django Reinhardt. Boisdale Of Belgravia, Eccleston St, SW1W 9LX (020 7730 6922). £12, £4.50 before 10pm.

FRIDAY 21 Joe Bonamassa Award-winning blues-rock from the American guitarist, promoting his ninth studio album, Dust Bowl. HMV Apollo, Queen Caroline St, W6 9QH (0843 221 0100). £30-£50.

Jens Lekman, Lia Ices The Swedish singer-songwriter performs guitar-based pop. Heaven, Charing Cross Arches, Villiers St, WC2N 6NG (020 7930 2020). £14.50. Ewan McLennan Traditional and contemporary folk from the Leeds-based singer-songwriter and guitarist. The Slaughtered Lamb, Great Sutton St, EC1V 0DX (020 7253 1516). £12, adv £10. Tatcho Drom Traditional folk and Balkan Gypsy music by the London-based outfit. Le QuecumBar, Battersea High St, SW11 3HX (020 7787 2227). £13, adv £10. Roddy Woomble Contemporary folk from the Mull-based singersongwriter and member of Idlewild. The Scala, Pentonville Rd, N1 9NL (020 7833 2022/cc 0844 477 1000). £16.

TUESDAY 18 Across The Sea Synth-pop with a 1980s feel by the London-based band. 100 Club, Oxford St, W1D 1LL (020 7636 0933). £20, adv £15. City And Colour Canadian singersongwriter Dallas Green performs acoustica. Roundhouse, Chalk Farm Rd, NW1 8EH (0844 482 8008). £22.50. Marketa Irglova Celtic and Latin folk by the Galway-based singersongwriter. Bush Hall, Uxbridge Rd, W12 7LJ (020 8222 6955). £15. Gerard Kenny The New Yorkborn Ivor Novello Award-winning songwriter and pianist plays easy listening and showtunes. The Pheasantry, Kings Rd, SW3 4UT (020 7351 5031). £22. Nero The London-based combo performs upbeat dubstep and electronica in support of its album Welcome Reality. Electric Ballroom, Camden High St, NW1 8QP (020 7485 9006). £15. Mohammad Reza Shajarian The Iranian vocalist sings traditional Persian music. With accompaniment from Shahnaz Ensemble, directed by Majid Derakhshani. Southbank Centre, Belvedere Rd, SE1 8XX (020 7960 4200/cc 0844 875 0073). £20-£60, concs £10-£30. Xzibit Platinum-selling hip-hop from the American rapper and presenter of Pimp My Ride, performing new material and songs from his albums Full Circle, Man Vs Machine and Weapons Of Mass Destruction. O2 Academy Islington, Parkfield St, N1 0PS (020 7288 4400/cc 0844 477 2000). £22.

Carlos Bonell Pop, rock and classical interpretations by the South American guitarist. Bolivar Hall at Venezuelan Embassy, Grafton Way, W1T 5DL (020 7584 4206). £15.

WEDNESDAY 19 Jochen Arbeit, Paul Beauchamp, Julia Kent Improvised and experimental music by the member of Einsturzende Neubauten and colleagues. Cafe Oto, Ashwin St, E8 3DL (020 7923 1231). £10, adv £8. Ana Egge Americana and country-pop from the Brooklynbased singer-songwriter. The Green Note Cafe, Parkway, NW1 7AN (020 7485 9899). £10. Enter Shikari, Your Demise The award-winning St Albansbased four-piece plays energised electronic post-hardcore. Electric Ballroom, Camden High St, NW1 8QP (020 7485 9006). £17. Roddy Frame Acoustica from the singer-songwriter and former Aztec Camera frontman. Bush Hall, Uxbridge Rd, W12 7LJ (020 8222 6955). £25. Goldheart Assembly Alt rock by the London-based band. The Spice Of Life, Moor St, W1D 5NA (020 7739 3025). £10. Darren Hayes The Australian singer-songwriter and former Savage Garden member plays pop in support of his album Secret Codes & Battleships. O2 Shepherd’s Bush Empire, Shepherd’s Bush Green, W12 8TT (020 8354 3300/ cc 0844 477 2000). £28.50. Angelita Jimenez The Brazilian guitarist-composer performs original material influenced by bossa nova and samba. Boisdale Of Belgravia, Eccleston St, SW1W 9LX (020 7730 6922). £12, £4.50 before 10pm. Pixie Lott Pop from the chart-topping singer-songwriter. HMV Forum, Highgate Rd, NW5 1JY (020 7344 0044). £25. The Sidewalk Doctors The Londonbased outfit plays reggae and ska. The Queen Of Hoxton, Curtain Rd, EC2A 3JX (020 7422 0958). £10. Taake Black metal by the band from Bjoergvin, Norway. The Underworld, Camden High St, NW1 0NE (020 7482 1932). £13.50.

Wakey Wakey New Yorkbased singer-songwriter and pianist Michael Grubbs leads his dramatic indiepop outfit. Heaven, Charing Cross Arches, Villiers St, WC2N 6NG (020 7930 2020). £11.

THURSDAY 20 Sezen Aksu The singersongwriter performs traditional and contemporary Turkish folk. Royal Albert Hall, Kensington Gore, SW7 2AP (0845 401 5045). £35-£80. Babasonicos Latin rock by the Argentinian band. Jamm, Brixton Rd, SW9 6LH (020 7346 8920/ cc 020 7274 5537). £23. The Cat Empire Ska-rock from the Australian six-piece. O2 Shepherd’s Bush Empire, Shepherd’s Bush Green, W12 8TT (020 8354 3300/ cc 0844 477 2000). £22.50. Freyja The award-winning Australian singer-songwriter performs soulful electroacoustica and folk-pop in support of the album Not That Girl. Bull’s Head, Lonsdale Rd, Barnes, SW13 9PY (020 8876 5241). £10. Hayseed Dixie The American outfit plays spirited bluegrass and country-rock. Dingwalls, Camden Lock, Chalk Farm Rd, NW1 8AB (020 7428 0010/ cc 020 7428 5929). £16. Metals The Australian two-piece plays electro-rock. Monto Water Rats, Gray’s Inn Rd, WC1X 8BZ (020 7837 4412). £6. Random Axe Hip-hop trio from the US, comprising Sean Price, Black Milk and Guilty Simpson. The Scala, Pentonville Rd, N1 9NL (020 7833 2022/ cc 0844 477 1000). £17.50. Reuben Richards & Soul Train Blues, funk and soul from the seven-piece. Boisdale’s Of Canary Wharf, Cabot Hall, E14 4QT (020 7715 5818). £20. Jack Savoretti Folk-pop by the London-based singer-songwriter. Relentless Garage, Highbury Corner, N5 1RD (0870 060 3777/ cc 0844 847 1678). £12.

British Sea Power Mercury Prize nominated indie-rock from the Brighton-based collective, including songs from its album Valhalla Dancehall. East Wintergarden, Canada Sq, E14 5AB (020 7334 3922). £17. Matt Goss The former Bros lead vocalist in a Las Vegas cabaretstyled show, featuring new interpretations of his past hits, as well of Rat Pack standards. Royal Albert Hall, Kensington Gore, SW7 2AP (0845 401 5045). £37-£55. Leela James, Omar, Nazarene, Relentless MC R’n’B and soul by the Los Angeles-born singer. The Clapham Grand, St John’s Hill, SW11 1TT (020 7223 6523). £25. Kaiser Chiefs The Leedsbased five-piece performs its playful indie-rock hits. HMV Forum, Highgate Rd, NW5 1JY (020 7344 0044). £25. Leaves Eyes, Vision Of Atlantis, Awake By Design Symphonic metal with folk metal elements by the band from Stavanger, Norway and Ludwigsburg, Germany. The Underworld, Camden High St, NW1 0NE (020 7482 1932). £13.50. Morcheeba Trip hop and electro by the multi-million selling band from London. Koko, Camden High St, NW1 7JE (0870 432 5527). £25. Sarah Jane Morris & Ian Shaw The singers perform songs by contemporary songwriters Tom Waits, Joni Mitchell, Nick Cave and Tracy Chapman amongst others. The Vortex Jazz Club, Dalston Culture House, Gillett St, N16 8JH (020 7254 4097). £16. Southside Johnny, The Asbury Jukes The veteran collective from New Jersey plays brassy blues. O2 Shepherd’s Bush Empire, Shepherd’s Bush Green, W12 8TT (020 8354 3300/ cc 0844 477 2000). £25 & £27.50. The Union Classic rock by the band formed by ex-Thunder guitarist Luke Morley. O2 Academy Islington, Parkfield St, N1 0PS (020 7288 4400/ cc 0844 477 2000). £14. Wolves In The Throne Room Black metal by the Washingtonbased band. XOYO, Cowper St, EC2A 4AP (020 7729 5959). £13.

SATURDAY 22 Blue Harlem The swing and jive septet from London plays golden era jump blues. Boisdale’s Of Canary Wharf, Cabot Hall, E14 4QT (020 7715 5818). £20. Blues For Heroes: The Blues Band, Matt Schofield And Ian Siegal Blues acts perform a concert to raise funds for injured service personnel. Cadogan Hall, Sloane Terrace, SW1X 9DQ (020 7730 4500). £39.50. Jay Brannan, Nick Howard Indie-folk by the New Yorkbased singer-songwriter. The Borderline, Orange Yard, Manette St, W1D 4JB (0870 060 3777/ cc 0871 231 0842). £10. Glen Campbell The veteran American singer-songwriter plays his countrified pop hits. Southbank Centre, Belvedere Rd, SE1 8XX (020 7960 4200/cc 0844 875 0073). £29.50-£42.50, concs £14.75-£21.25. Detroit Soul Soul favourites from the nine-piece. Dover St Restaurant And Bar, Dover St, W1S 4LQ (020 7629 9813). £15, diners free before 10pm. Dean Friedman Comedy popfolk by the American singersongwriter. The Bloomsbury Theatre, Gordon St, WC1H 0AH (020 7388 8822). £25. Goldfish Electronica by the Cape Town-based combo. Relentless Garage, Highbury Corner, N5 1RD (0870 060 3777/cc 0844 847 1678). £15. Lux The London-based outfit plays soulful indie-punk. O2 Academy Islington, Parkfield St, N1 0PS (020 7288 4400/ cc 0844 477 2000). £10 & £25. Eric Ranzoni Blues Band Piano-led blues outfit. Boisdale Of Belgravia, Eccleston St, SW1W 9LX (020 7730 6922). £12, £4.50 before 10pm. Ed Sheeran Soulful pop from the London-based singersongwriter. HMV Forum, Highgate Rd, NW5 1JY (020 7344 0044). £15.

SUNDAY 23 Amon Amarth The Swedish outfit plays melodic death metal. HMV Forum, Highgate Rd, NW5 1JY (020 7344 0044). £16.50. Bon Iver Indie-folk songsmith Justin Vernon leads an eight-piece band, performing songs from its self-titled sophomore album and debut For Emma, Forever Ago. HMV Apollo, Queen Caroline St, W6 9QH (0843 221 0100). £20-£30.50. Michael Franti, Spearhead Funk-infused rock and hip-hop from the California-based singersongwriter. Koko, Camden High St, NW1 7JE (0870 432 5527). £22.50. Michelle Shocked Country music from the American singersongwriter. Bush Hall, Uxbridge Rd, W12 7LJ (020 8222 6955). £20. Gary Williams The vocalist and star of the West End’s Rat Pack sings swing. Ronnie Scott’s, Frith St, W1D 4HT (020 7439 0747). £12-£15.

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Clockwise: Carl Warner's food landscape art; Emily Crane's edible couture; creepy cake byLily Vanilli; Professor Charles Spence; macabre cupcake by Vanilli

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Thought for food The Experimental Food Society gathers in London for its annual spectacular. It‘s sure to stimulate minds as well as appetites WORDS JAHN VANNISSELROY

Consider that meal you had last night. That curry, those vegetables, that burger. Perhaps, if you‘re well-heeled enough, that caviar. Chances are, whatever you ate, you weren‘t getting the most of out of it. It could, nay should, have tasted better. The problem is you, like most of the nation, aren‘t in tune with what you place on your tongue. It may seem odd, but a little light music may help. In fact, Professor Charles Spence is adamant it would. An experimental psychologist at Oxford University, Spence is well qualified to talk about taste. In 2008, he provided the first robust empirical demonstration that the background music we hear influences the flavours of the food we eat, and was duly awarded an Ig (spoof) Nobel Prize for nutrition. He‘s also a member of the Experimental Food Society, which holds its annual Spectacular in east London this weekend. The group, a collection of 56 groundbreaking food creatives brought together since 2009 by Alexa Perrin, aims to demonstrate there is more to our eating lives than just swallowing. As such, they will be on hand to meet the public and discuss their work, and Spence is itching to share his tales of taste to help improve the way Britain enjoys the flavours of its food. “If you’re cooking an Indian meal, it will probably taste that much better with ethnic music playing,“ he insists. “It is a really cheap thing to do; change the music and that can really impact the taste, but that’s something we can all do“ Spence‘s experiments revealed that at one end of the scale, when the brain hears higher-pitched music, say the tinkling of a piano, it associates that with a sweeter, more citric flavour; alternatively, a lower-pitched sound, that of a brass instrument, is more in line with a bitter, dark chocolate taste. Then there are all the notes in between. Now that we are starting to understand these relationships, we can tap into areas of our brain to get the most out of what we eat. And that‘s tasty news for us all. The potential health benefits are just as attractive. If sound can stimulate the brain into increasing the salt taste of a food, we won‘t need to add so much. And Spence is already working with drink companies to minimise the use of the chemical responsible for the fizz in our drink cans. “Research has shown that if you reduce the amount of carbonic acid, people don‘t drink it, they like the bubbles,“ he says. “We‘re doing research to change the sound of the

popping bubble in a can or cup to make that drink sound more fizzy than it is, or by changing design of cans or containers to emphasise the sounds. It‘s all about capitalising on psychology by using sound and sensory interaction.“ Considering this work, the good professor is an ideal member of the Experimental Food Society. But with the group containing the likes of food magician John Van der Put, who turns water into ouzo; Ginger Comfort Emporium, which imports camel milk to use in ice cream; and cake artist Lily Vanilli, who will be sculpting 18 creations around east London this weekend, it must be a tough ask for any chef who cooks their annual banquet. “They’re an interesting bunch,“ says the founder, Perrin, whose uncle was among first to open a Thai restaurant in London. “I refer to them as the unsung heroes of the food industry. They represent the interesting things that are happening in the UK food scene, people that are actually pioneering different areas of food.“ Perrin started the society after being disappointed and uninspired by the food trade shows on offer in the UK, and says culinary art and experimentation, for so long buried in British society due to wars and consumerism, ››

Morgaine Gaye (l) and Emily Crane‘s edible couture TNTMAGAZINE.COM

Music would make this even sweeter is now undergoing a renaissance. “We all experience food, everyday,“ she says. “If you can make the experience more exciting, why not?“ The efforts of Cultivated Couture‘s Emily Crane certainly belong at the ‘exciting‘ end of the food spectrum. Crane is a gastronomic tailor whose work goes far beyond that of USbased Franc Fernandez, who hung a bit of raw lamb on Lady Gaga at the VMA awards last year. “It‘s a little more subtle,“ says Crane, who developed her concept when wondering what a fashion practitioner would do if no traditional resources remained. “I cook, blend, culture and form ice bubbles from food to create a sensory world of transient fashion.“ Her use of food by-products – especially pork and beef gelatin – to marry different types of seaweed to create wearable items has garnered interest from the fashion world across Europe. “And they‘re definitely edible,“ she says of her garments. “I’m currently in love with the idea your own body can dispose of your socks at the end of the day.“ But while chowing down on sweaty hosiery may not be to everyone‘s taste, Crane insists it‘s not too far in the future that we all could be eating our clothing. “Essentially we can wear these garments now. They‘re incredibly inexpensive because the material themselves are not expensive. We‘re talking here about by-products and you don‘t need a lot of technology or machinery to create these clothes.“ And it‘s the perfect chance to have that one-off item of clothing that no one will ever be seen in again. “This really is a fresh alternative to the compulsive shopper obsessed with fast fashion, high-street consumption and throw-away prices,“ she adds. Crane‘s vision is exactly the sort of thing that would attract

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The Experimental Food Society Spectacular, Fri, Oct 21, 1pm-6pm; Sat, Oct 22, 11am-6pm Truman Brewery Dray Walk, 91 Brick Lane, E1 6QL experimentalfoodsociety.com Aldgate East Tickets £5 from wegottickets.com

Photos: Thinkstock, Getty

Try some camel milk ice cream this weekend

the nose of food futurologist Dr Morgaine Gaye, currently involved in the manipulation of odour styling and smell science. Gaye‘s work with product developers has led her to understand just how aspirational UK society is; how trenddriven we have become – and our diets are included in that. Because smell, along with taste, is such an unexplored sense, advertisers are now looking at ways to infiltrate our nostrils in order to get us to part with our cash. It‘s happening already; consider why you can walk down the coffee aisle at a supermarket, past a bunch of hermetically sealed glass jars but still smell the aroma. “It‘s because the coffee smell is embedded in the label,“ Gaye explains. “Lots of food brands are doing it and it can influence your behaviour. That’s why Whole Foods is doing so well, because people can smell the produce, the bread. “We’re only just at the start, we’ll look back in 20 years and go ‘look at us, what idiots we were‘.“ She says odour, or our perception of it (due to the amount of synthetic smells out there, our sense has become corrupted) will soon be sent over the internet with the use of computer-activated USB sticks. And it goes further, too. “In Japan, there‘s already embedded scent in clothing – men‘s shirts that when your neck rubs around the collar, release a scent. And then there are aroma jockies, DJs who spin the disks and spin the scent at the same time, to influence where you are in the mood of the clubbing event.“ Gaye‘s excited about the future of what and how we eat and also about presenting her findings at this weekend‘s Experimental Food Society Spectacular. Indeed, her articulation of the role our cuisine plays in 2011 seems to sum up collective quite nicely. “Food no longer exists in a vacuum,“ she says. “It’s affected by what we‘re wearing, what we’re thinking, what trends are around at the time, how those trends are influenced by politics – things like money, what’s going on environmentally, how we talk about things, what we read, what films are out there. “Every single thing or we think about or what we don’t think about affects how we eat.“ ❚

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2 TICKETS FOR FULHAM V EVERTON SUNDAY 23 OCTOBER one lucky reader the chance to win two tickets for their upcoming home fixture at Craven Cottage against Everton on Sunday 23 October 2011 (Kick-Off 1.30pm). Fulham and Socceroo’s goalkeeper, Mark Schwarzer, will be between the posts and up against fellow Australian, Everton’s lively midfielder Tim Cahill – who scored at the Cottage two seasons ago. Tickets can be requested as either adult or junior and will be valid for this match only. The winners’ seats will be located in the Riverside Stand (non-transferrable) (non transferrable) where you

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Tom Findlay The Groove Armada DJ tells us about the dance duo’s upcoming gig at the Battersea Power Station and explains why they shouldn’t have sold out to Marks & Spencer INTERVIEW ALISON GRINTER

Your music is usually associated with sunnier places, such as Ibiza. So how do you think it’s going to go down with the crowd at the Relentless Freeze Festival? We’ll fit in fine – there’s always been that ‘up and at ‘em’ vibe about winter sports. We’re expecting the same sort of energy, and, in terms of the setting, it’s going to be great. Playing at the Battersea Power Station seems like one of those once-in-alifetime moments you can’t pass up... I’ve always wanted to play there. And there’s quite a strong visual aspect to the show we’re doing with lights and lasers. We’re using this kinetic technology, which is basically Xbox cameras taking images of me and Andy in real time and beaming them on to a big screen. The Power Station will make a great backdrop for that. It’s a great landmark. If they ever knock it down, I’d like to be able to say I played there. Your own festival, Lovebox, started out as a little clubnight in West London and grew into a massive annual event... Next year is 10 years of Lovebox, so it’s going to be a big one. I’m already planning it. We want to celebrate some of the things that have made the event great over the past decade. And it’s going to be about us rediscovering our creative mojo a little bit which we kind of possibly lost sight of along the way. So there’s this commitment from everybody to make it the most amazing year yet. It seems much more at home in Victoria Park, Hackney, than in Clapham. It’s a nicer park, you can do more with the space. Clapham Common is just a bit of a flat pancake. And east London is where the energy of the music scene is coming from at the moment, so it feels natural. There’s been a real power shift in the music industry from west London to east London. When you started out in the late Nineties, no one was really making dance albums but that’s all changed... No, they weren’t. And at about the same time we started, this chill-out thing came along and we got lumped in with that. We were just trying to make dance albums but it quickly became a

Not at the river just now: Tom Findlay (left) with Andy Cato golden age with us and the Chemical Brothers. And now everyone’s making dance records. There’s a band called Azari III who are going to be supporting us at Freeze. I think they’ve made the best dance album of the year. Did you hate the whole ‘chill-out’ tag? I wasn’t too worried about it, but people who came along to our gigs thinking they could sit down got a bit of a surprise when we played songs like Superstylin’ and I See You Baby. Your last album, Black Light, was quite dark and moody. Were you trying to get away from the sort of serotoninboosting tunes you were famous for? It was just where our heads were at at that particular time. We were going through a lot of life changes and were no longer with a major label. There are songs on that album which are some of the best things we’ve done in a long time. Sometimes you‘ve just got to go with it. Emotionally it was a more complex time, so the album was quite a cathartic experience, like coming out of a Greek tragedy. It made me feel better about life. Now we’re returning to the dancefloor, in a way, but we’re not interested in the charts – we’re not interested in playing that game anymore. I want to make great dance music and play at good events.

At The River is a gorgeous tune but I resent the fact that I now associate it with Marks & Spencer’s food. For that I blame you for letting them use it! I know, shame. Sometimes those ads can work really well, like when Fyfe Dangerfield covered She’s Always A Woman [by Billy Joel] for John Lewis. But At The River was a mistake because it was one of those songs that meant a lot to people. People told us it was a sellout. I’ve lost count of the people who’ve told me they got married to that song so it was a bit naughty, because we’ve ruined a few people’s wedding days. With the benefit of hindsight, I probably wouldn’t have done it again. If you had to choose, which gig stands out as your best of all time. In 2007, when we headlined The Other Stage at Glastonbury. We had two great singers and our lasers were really firing. We threw everything at that show and got a lot back. I remember doing the gig and not enjoying it at all at the time, but then I’m always quite down on our performances. But I watched the whole thing back and it was one of the most amazing things I’ve ever seen. Relentless Freeze Festival, Oct 28-29. £37 (day) £60 (two-day) Battersea Power St Battersea Park relentlessfreeze.com

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WE NEED TO TALK ABOUT KEVIN FILM review by Alison Grinter STARRING: Tilda Swinton, John C Reilly, Ezra Miller | TBC | 112mins

CONTAGION FILM STARRING: Matt Damon, Kate Winslet, Jude Law | 12A | 106mins

Many crimes have been committed in the name of the “disaster movie” but if anyone can avoid the cliches and pitfalls of the genre, it’s Steven Soderbergh. The thinking person’s Hollywood director has plotted a tense sci-fi thriller about a lethal airborne virus which fast becomes a global pandemic triggering panic and societal breakdown. The film features a stellar cast and a level of scientific accuracy which has been praised by academics. 28

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We Need To Talk About Kevin is one of those rare films which is actually better than the source novel which inspired it. Director Lynne Ramsay has jettisoned author Lionel Shriver's droning, one-tone narration for an dynamic viewing experience which jangles the nerves and unsettles the soul. It’s exactly what watching a film about the genesis of a serial killer should feel like. Tilda Swinton is supremely sympathetic as the guilt-ridden mother, Eva, living in a tatty, cash-strapped purgatory of her own making after her sociopathic son Kevin (played as a teenager by Ezra Miller to chilling effect) goes on a Columbine-style shooting. The story is told simultaneously from three different time-frames: the past, present and future (involving a meeting between mother and son in a high security prison) creating a frenetic pace which never lets up. Ramsay is an extraordinary director. Her unique style, honed on low-budget flicks like Morven Caller, finds its fullest expression here. At the risk of making Pseud’s Corner in Private Eye, I’d go as far as to say she’s created a new visual language for screen which is layered and textured and has the power to make viewers squirm with discomfort. The scene where Kevin chews on a perfectly cylindrical lychee, just as we learn his younger sister has lost her eye, is a case in point. The soundtrack of sunny pop, set discordantly against a simmering mood of anger and resentment, is another masterstroke. She overdoes the red lietmotif (see cans pictured) and John C Reilly is miscast as Kevin’s father, but in all, a fine film. GOOD FOR: Those who thought Lionel Shriver didn’t realise the story’s full potential in her book.

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Immediately recognisable as quirky IT gal Dobby from Peep Show, Isy Suttie had an Edinburgh hit this year with her timely new show, Pearl And Dave. This heartbreaking, multi-character tale of internet romance is peppered with vignettes from her own love life and poignantly sweet comic songs. The show gets its London debut this week.

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Bloomsbury Theatre 15 Gordon St, WC1H 0AH. Fri, Oct 21. £13. thebloomsbury.com Euston

CANADIAN PAINTING THE GROUP OF SEVEN

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Directly influenced by the Canadian postimpressionist-aping painter Tom Thomson, the Group of Seven was a collection of artists inspired by Canadia’s awe-inspiring wilderness in the 1910s. They soon put paid to the idea the the landscape was too wild and untamed to inspire ‘true’ art.

An adroit mix of the laugh-out-loud funny and the touchingly poignant Saul Rubinek’s play shows the maturity which comes with middleage. Caroline Quentin’s self-sufficient widowed Hedda is more than happy to share her home and her bed with the emotionally adolescent Jake in Frank Oz’s sitcom-style production.

Dulwich Picture Gallery Gallery Road, SE21 7AD. Oct 19-Jan 8. £9 dulwichpicturegallery.org.uk West Dulwich

Menier Chocolate Factory SE1 1RU. Until Nov 12. £29.50 menierchocolatefactory.com

London Brg

JASON BYRNE Give us an elevator pitch for your new show Cirque du Byrne Roll up, roll up, the circus is in town. Are there lions? No! Are there elephants? No! Are there clowns? No! Is it a circus?... Well no, it’s Jason Byrne in a red jacket with gold buttons and shiny lights.

Photos: Helen Warner

Have you ever died onstage? Once I turned to ask an audience member a question and clicked my dodgy knee out of place. The audience howled as I fell to the floor in pain. I asked for help but the more I struggled the more they laughed. I had to continue the gig with my knee hanging off. They just didn’t care. Well, I was in Edinburgh – the Scots are hard as nails.

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STARRING: Morgan Spurlock, J.J. Abrams, Peter Berg 12A | 90mins Morgan Spurlock

Conor McPherson misses the mark with his latest tale of ghostly manifestations. The characters struggle to engage, the plot is a muddle and the supernatural elements fail to frighten. Thank heavens for a dotty, cane-wielding granny who injects some much needed humour. LK

For his new documentary, the Super Size Me and 30 Days director goes behind closed doors at some of the biggest advertising agencies in the world to investigate how corporate branding has managed to invade our everyday lives. On General Release

Lyttelton at the National South Bank, SE1 9PX. Until Dec 11. £12-£45 nationaltheatre.org.uk Waterloo

Who was your nemesis at school? Barry O’Brien, the Ballet Bastard. All the girls loved him and the lads thought he was cool. He looked great, was able to dance, and for some reason this was not a gay thing in my school. Finish the statement: at heart I’m just a frustrated: G-string, oh yeah...hmmmmmmmm. Hammersmith Apollo, W6 9QH Fri, Oct 28. £17.50.

venues.meanfiddler.com Hammersmith

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Forza Motorsport 4 X360

Speed around from the comfort of your sofa in the ultimate racing game. £37.99 argos.co.uk

Album

Will the Oasis veteran be the same without little bro? £8.99 sainsburys.co.uk

Red Dead Redemption Orienteers: Orienteers

PS3

Get your guns and hunt down a criminal gang – who used to be your friends. £24.89 base.com

Album

Sparse, fragile and hazy folk songs about love and travel. £5.99 amazon.co.uk

Let Your Hair Down Carol Ann Duffy: The Bees

Online app

Ever thought of getting a perm? This app lets you see youself in weird hairstyles. Free tgifridays.co.uk

Book

Check out our poet laureate’s latest collection of verse. £10.49 waterstones.com

iDream Terry Pratchett: Snuff

iPhone app

Had a dream about eating ice cream with fangs? Think it’s an omen? Find out here. Free itunes.apple.com

Book

The new instalment in the legendary Discworld series. £11.99 bookdepository. co.uk

Magicbox minuet portable radio Setup

DAB and FM

DVD

Tons more stations than usual, and in bright pink. £32.75 qvcuk.com

Non-stop action from an unlikely cast of Bruce Willis, Ryan Phillippe and 50 Cent. £9.99 amazon.co.uk

HD 229 Headphones

Matching Jack

You may look a bit pretentious, but your music will sound bloody good. £59.99 sennheiser.co.uk

DVD

Northern Irish legend James Nesbitt in a dramatic tale of love, betrayal and hope. £8.99 amazon.co.uk

App of the Week The Magners Bee Beard iPhone

Add one of six styles of bee beard to photos of your friends – from waxed wings (a curved moustache) to buzz muffler (big sideburns). Free itunes.apple.com

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Black embellished dress Body con is an Essex girls’ staple, so squeeze those curves in.

Lipsy chiffon embellished one-shoulder dress Rack up those TOWIE points with an attention-grabbing bright red style that shows off those perma-tanned pins.

Mistress heels These towering shoes by Head Over Heels will set you above the rest in the glam stakes.

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MARKETWATCH BAGPUSS & CO

All things Bagpuss and Clangers, the stars of one of Britain’s most iconic children’s shows, will feature in a West London pop-up shop. Original fans of the 1970s cult programme can expect some nostalgic moments, with the chance to clap eyes on the saggy cloth Bagpuss puppet used in the show as well as his friends Gabriel, Madeline, Professor Yaffle and the singing mice. Decorated on the inside with original sketches from the show’s creators, Peter Firmin and Oliver Postgate, and fashioned on the outside so as to replicate Emily’s famous Bagpuss store from the show, Bagpuss & Co will be a visual feast for visitors. The windows will be filled with a plethora of lost and broken treasures, too. Of course, there’ll be an opportunity to part with your money, with everything from toys and greeting cards, to DVDs and even microwavable Bagpuss slippers to buy.

TOWIE style

Blue Harbour Pique Highlight Stripe T-shirt Wear it two sizes too small to show off your pumped-up guns and bronzed physique.

£5.

Black bow tie Take some inspiration from Arg and pick up his dapper/ comedy trademark bow tie.

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Sparkle firework earrings Bling, bling and bling some more in these bits of fauxdiamond jewellery.

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OPEN Tue, Oct 25 until Sun, Oct 30 whiteleys.com 144-151 Queensway, W2 4YN Queensway

Black bomber jacket Get on it and rock that leather like Joey Essex.

Silver hotpants It may be autumn, but hotpants are worn all year round in TOWIE land.

Two-tone lace ups Metrosexual shoes are a must if you’re going out to the Sugar Hut. next.co.uk

missselfridge.com

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LIFESTYLEHEALTH LIFESTYLESHOPPING CLASS OF THE WEEK

PONGATHON If you’ve been known to sport some ping pong prowess in the garden of your local boozer, now you have the opportunity take your skills to a wider audience. Step up to the plate on Monday, October 24, at Pongathon, a ping pong party where, there will be two floors filled with wall-to-wall ping pong playing for anyone who’s keen to have a go. The ping pong tables will be set against a backdrop of live visual art showing weird and wonderful ping pong footage from around the world, exhibition games, trick shots and coaching tips from the professionals. The Pongathon robot will also make his debut, challenging players to reach high scores for a prize. The highlight of the day will be a world record attempt for the most players to participate in a single rally. The first 150 people to sign up to the Pongathon Facebook page, will to try to snatch the current record of 101 held by Shanghai’s Cao Yanhua table-tennis training school. The event runs from 5pm-11pm and every little bit of this ping pong madness is free.

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Shop for me Too lazy to pick an outfit out for yourself? Get one of London’s personal shoppers to do it for you WORDS CLARE VOOGHT

The thought of having someone else pick out clothes for you can seem either brilliant or utterly terrifying. But, if you hate the weekend trudge around central London shops, it’s worth trying personal shopping. First, some basic principles. Most high street personal shopping appointments are free and you specify what you want when you book. Then when you go in and let a style adviser tell you what works for you and, frankly, what doesn’t as you pick out an item, outfit or new wardrobe.

Topshop, Oxford Circus This is definitely one for the fad-conscious, as customers get dressed in any of four of the season’s trends. This autumn/winter, they’re focusing on New Mod (androgynous and tailored), Prim and Polished (vintageinspired), Glam Underground (1970s brash) and Bavaria (folky, furry and warm). My personal shopper brings me a selection from New Mod and Prim and Polished – some

more flattering than others – then I choose the ones I like best. I finish with clothes that I wouldn’t have picked myself (pointy silver heels and some hot pink trousers) but some of them, I’d have bought (floral top with a Peter Pan collar). Appointments range from 30 minutes to two hours, depending on what you want. Free; 216 Oxford Street, W1D 1LA; topshop. com/personalshopping

John Lewis, Oxford Street The personal shopper has free reign of all the department’s brands, so you have plenty to choose from. I ask for a British countryside look and was put in a dark-green padded jacket, a knitted jumper, leather riding-style boots and some skinny jeans in a similar colour to the Topshop ones (maybe they’re trying to tell me something). It took several tries to find the right ensemble, but when we did, it was something I could carry off easily and not feel trussed up like a doll. The

Richmix, 35-47 Bethnal Green Road, E1 6LA Pongathon.com Shoreditch High Street Shoreditch High Street

A personal shopper helps you get it right 32

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The writer gets the countryside look for 2011

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WHAT’S NEW

Shaving Cream for Mods Watch out for those rockers £9.95 feelunique.com

Eliminate the hassle from your shopping style adviser was attentive and made sure the clothes suited my shape. Appointments last two hours. Free. 300 Oxford Street, W1A 1EX; johnlewis.com

Dorothy Perkins, Oxford Street An expert will help you pick that perfect pair of jeans or special outfit with emphasis on

AND FOR THE GUYS Personal shoppers at Debenhams, Oxford Street, have loads of brands on tap (debenhams.com) From quick fixes to wardrobe overhauls at Topman (topman.com/personalshopping) Vintage Style Doctor tells you which retro clothes suit you best (vintagestyledoctor.com)

getting the best for your budget. They find you the latest – wearable – trends. Appointments as long as the customer needs. Free; 379 Oxford Street, W1C 2JS; dorothyperkins.com/styleadvisor

Giorgio Armani Code Sport Really fancy deoderant £15.00 johnlewis.com

Lovely’s Vintage Emporium, Various Former fashion magazine editor Lynette Peck Bateman runs a home personal shopping service. She’ll bring suitcases of vintage clothes to your door for oneto-one or group-shopping appointments. All over London. NEXT WEEK Free; lovelysvintage-emporium. Avant-ski: get in shape for the slopes myshopify.com

TOWIE Essex glow bronzer Channel your inner Essex girl £10.00 superdrug.com

Photos: TNT, Getty

TOP TREATMENT: THE SALT CAVE The Salt Cave is said to work wonders for skin conditions such as eczema and to be a powerful remedy for respiratory problems including cold, coughs and asthma. It’s also very relaxing, as you just lie in a lounger, snuggled up under a blanket, in a room where the floors and walls are covered with salt. For the best results, you’ll need a series of sessions, but after just an hour we feel our airways have been cleansed – helping us run faster for the train home. LC

Pepper optional

320B Earlsfield Road, SW18 3EJ

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Earlsfield

Nails Inc magnetic nail polish Creates lovely patterns £13.00 debenhams.com

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LIFESTYLECAREERS

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Highs and lows: not all passengers will be easy to deal with

A flying start Get a job where your head is quite literally in the clouds WORDS REBECCA KENT

Flight attendants, air hostesses, or even trolley dollies. Call them what you will, the work of a cabin crew member is a serious one with very exciting prospects.

Physically demanding Cabin crew workers often live up to the stereotype: tidy, immaculately groomed and hideously charming. But the calm exterior belies a rather more manic mindset. You’ll learn to be adept at keeping up the charade, says Laura Hutcheson, 32, who has been an air stewardess for Virgin for more than 10 years. “I’ll never forget my first time. I flew to Miami and the whole thing was such a blur. Nothing can prepare you for how busy you’ll be,” she says. 34

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“Flights are physically demanding – you work through the night and miss out on sleep. Resting on the flight or not, you’re always working.” Racked with travel envy thanks to her backpacking friends – and burdened with student loans, having just finished a law degree – working as an air stewardess seemed like a good idea. “It was perfect. I could save money, stay in nice hotels, travel and get paid for it,” Hutcheson says.

Have you got the right traits? Strong customer relations skills are the basis for a good cabin crew candidate, but you’ll need a lot more to go all the way. Virgin Atlantic (virgin-atlantic. com) has recently announced it will

create more than 1000 new jobs, including cabin crew in an expansion plan. But it only wants people who have a “winning mix of personality, professionalism and potential, not to mention talent”. Ryanair seeks people with “energy and commitment to work in a fast-paced environment”. It’s hardly reassuring, but they also want good swimmers, and you’ll need to be healthy. Since you’re dealing with international customers, fluency in English is also essential. Patience is a virtue, too, because passengers will test your tolerance with absurd requests. “We were ahead of schedule on a flight once and a woman asked if we could slow it down so she could get a full seven hours’ sleep,” Hutcheson

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ON THE JOB JESSICA MCCRORIE CAREER Sales manager, Ripley’s Believe It Or Not AGE 23 LIVES West London How did you get into your line of work? I started here as a visitor assistant, working on the admissions tills, while studying an MA degree in marketing. I got a job in marketing when I finished because I was in the right place at the right time.

Lady in red: Laura Hutcheson says. “You definitely need to have a passion for people in this job because you can go from being anything from a security guard, to a nurse to a counsellor.”

Go sky high

Fly away: travel for free THE BEST OF THE REST It takes more than cabin crew to run an airline, so if you’re not cut out for the role, consider a job in customer services, sales, marketing, HR or e-business. Closer to the action, check-in staff, flight operations and cargo staff are required. You’ll get less dirty working behind the bar of a clubhouse. There, even beauty therapists and stylists are needed. Aspiring pilots should look to British Airways, which has launched its biggest recruitment drive in 10 years. Training is notoriously expensive at £100,000, but BA will cover costs, which you repay when you start working.

Your efforts will be rewarded reasonably well. The starting rate of pay for a new cabin crew member is about £1100 per month, but there is strong emphasis on promotion across most airlines, so it is possible to earn at least £25,000 within the year working as a customer service supervisor. Esteemed airlines pay at least £5000 more.

Photos: Thinkstock

Get busy A passenger’s flying experience is heavily predicated on the service provided by cabin crew. Plus, an airline will spend about £14,000 on uniforms and training for each crew member. As a result the application process is an exercise in jumping hoops. At Virgin, successful applicants are required to undergo a day-long assessment, which involves group discussions and

role plays, aptitude tests, and you will be encouraged to divulge examples of when you’ve got out of sticky situations. Give yourself an edge over your competitors by doing a cabin crew training course, £99 for one day (cabincrewcourse.co.uk).

Feel the passion

Airlines post their positions on their websites, and Ryanair holds recruitment days, where you can fill in an application and hope to called back for an interview. Hutcheson says passion for travel is important. “There’s no point in doing this job if you’re just going to lay your head in the hotel as soon as you arrive,” she says. You get a minimum of 24 hours between flights, so there’s always time to explore.” And there are other perks to the job – great duty free deals, reduced airfares for family. But just NEXT WEEK remember, looking good Moonlighting: score a second job at 4am is an art form.

What do you do day-to-day? Ripley’s is home to 700 rare curiosities from around the world, so it’s a unique attraction. To ensure we communicate the right way, I often research and implement ideas to make it appeal to different audiences. The best part of your job is … watching people’s reactions when they see some of the exhibits, such as the authentic Ecuadorian shrunken heads or the world’s heaviest man. What’s the most challenging? When loads of groups come in at once.

HOW TO ... PLAY

MUSIC AT WORK

• Music can be a great motivator at work. It can make a slow day go faster and help in the creative process. If you’re researching, try a little jazz, such as Miles Davis.

• If you need to tap into your

creative side, go for some ‘mature pop’ such as Shawn Colvin, Colin Hay or The Police. At the end of the day, crank up rock classics.

• Always check with your

colleagues before you play music on speakers.

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Senior Account Manager ¥ ¥ ¥

Dynamic Senior Account Manager, Marketing Migrant Settlement, Protection and Attraction Ð Immigration New Zealand London

This is an exciting hands-on role for someone looking to make a real difference to New Zealand’s economic growth. Dynamism, flexibility and sound judgement are pre-requisites, as is the ability to manage and nurture a wide range of business to business relationships including employers, sector organisations and other New Zealand government agencies. As well as businesses and agencies, you will also need to be able to deal directly with highly skilled migrants who are seeking to make New Zealand their home. The Senior Account Manager is an integral part of the Migrant Attraction Unit which has a significant role in the execution of the Department’s migrant attraction and retention strategy. As well as direct implementation, this also involves working as part of the wider NZ government (NZ Inc) approach to promotion of New Zealand. Ideally we are seeking someone with sound experience in digital media, and preferably with a marketing qualification. You will need to be a confident presenter and comfortable absorbing and disseminating often complex material. To be successful in the role, you will have: ¥ Experience of New Zealand and an understanding of the country, itÕs people, economy and the governmentÕs Economic Growth Agenda. ¥ Excellent written and oral communication skills, including the ability to present conÞdently to a wide range of audiences. ¥ Knowledge and understanding of the NZ labour market and how immigration contributes to its growth and development. ¥ Understanding of the European labour markets and economic indicators. ¥ Proven success in establishing positive working relationships with a wide variety of organisations, groups and individuals. ¥ The ability to manage ßuctuating workloads in often stressful situations. ¥ Flexibility and resourcefulness. You will be proactive, conÞdent and prepared to deal with a wide range of interrelated operational, political and marketing issues. ¥ The ability to think strategically to form an overview, retain a customer focus and deliver innovative solutions to a wide range of complex issues. This is a rare opportunity to be part of building New Zealand’s future. Applications close 5pm (NZ time) Monday, 24 October 2011. Applicants must be able to work in the United Kingdom. The Department of Labour is an EEO employer and invites applications from all sectors of the community.

For a full job description visit www.dol.govt.nz/careers

tntjobs.co.uk RUGGERBEEZ LTD T: 07702 174544 www.ruggerbeez.com

JOB OF THE WEEK: Xxxxxxxxxxxx Coach/Head coach Xxxxxxx Salary: Xxxxxxxxx Location: London Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx Salary: £12-£20 per/hr depending on experience

Ruggerbeez teach multi-skill sport development through a play-based rugby programme for boys and girls aged 2-7.

We need motivated,| Email fun & experienced people to join our team! Coaches required Name | Number in Chiswick, Putney, Dulwich, Clapham Common, Wimbledon, Twickenham and at selected schools and rugby clubs. CRB required. First aid beneficial. Dan Dyer | 07702 174544 | jobs@ruggerbeez.com

PURCELL RADIO SYSTEMS LTD T: 020 7739 8060 www.purcellradio.com

JOB OF THE WEEK: Office Manager Location: Hoxton, London Salary: TBA

We are a small company supplying: Radio Communication Systems, software for Task Management & Compliance Auditing, to clients across the UK.

Permanent role: Good all rounder with book keeping and general admin \ computer experience. Good telephone manner essential Able & happy to work alone providing back up for a small dedicated team.

THE MAGNOLIA ROOM

JOB OF THE WEEK: Junior Therapist/Receptionist Location: Putney Salary: Basic plus commission

T: 020 8785 1891 www.themagnoliaroom.co.uk The Magnolia Room is a busy salon based in Putney offering both traditional beauty treatments and advanced machine based therapies.

Noel Purcell | 020 7739 8060 | CV to ask@purcellradio.com

This is a full time position. You will be selling treatments and products, as well as delivering quality treatments and services. Elemis, Guinot or Dermalogica training is an advantage, but not essential. Elaine Smith or Sonya da Silva | 020 8785 1891 | info@themagnoliaroom.co.uk

Looking for your next job? NEW JOBS ONLINE EVERY DAY 36

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JOBS

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CASH-SAVING TIPS

HOW YOU SPEND IT!

Need some more bang Xxxxxxxxx in your buck? Follow our handy advice XXXXXXXXX

rather than eating out so much. It’s more effort, but better for your bank balance!

Xxxxxxxxxxx

GET CHEAPER THREADS Sick of trundling around XXXXXXXXX the shops trying to find Xxxxxxxxxxx the best deals, only to return with sore feet XXXXXXXXX and panic-bought tat? Xxxxxxxxxxx Get on to men’s and women’s fashion website XXXXXXXXX stylecompare.co.uk, where Xxxxxxxxxxx you can search for specific items from lots of high street shops and nab the cheapest around.

Photos: Thinkstock, TNT

TRACK YOUR SPLURGES Keep an close eye on your finances with Nexus Money, an app that lets you log exactly what you’ve earned and spent. It costs £1.49 and also lets you track any expenses you need to claim back from work, so there are no excuses for forgetting.

Last big blow-out? The airfare to New York – I’m going with one of my best friends from home for Thanksgiving. With the US dollar how it is, I can buy my family’s Christmas presents there to save money, too.

ANNALISE WALLIKER, 27 JOB PR manager FROM Melbourne LIVES Notting Hill How do you budget? I have a few bank accounts that I transfer money to

Any money-saving tips? Invite friends over for dinner

What non-essential items do you spend money on? I play in Tribo, a local Brazilian samba/ reggae percussion band. I have weekly workshop classes all year round so I play my best at Notting Hill Carnival.

HOW THEY SPEND IT! Celebrities and hot tubs Ashton Kutcher’s alleged topless hot-tub party at the San Diego Hard Rock Hotel’s £2500-a-night Diamond Suite has caused a stir. But he’s not the first celeb to love bubbles...

❚ George Clooney had his own chill-out complex built, with a private garden, hut and hot tub for the tidy sum of £63,815. Rumours are the hot tub has been the scene of some raunchy parties.

PAY LESS TAX Been paying council tax for a while? You can now challenge how much you’re spending and get a backdated refund if you’ve been paying through the nose. Visit voa.gov.uk to see if you’re eligible. SKI TRAVEL /70 HALLOWEEN /8

– one for rent and bills, one for long-term and one for short-term savings and my current account for day-today spending.

George: likes to relax

❚ The recent steamy and booze-fuelled X Factor boot camp hot-tub party happened at Selsdon Park hotel in Croydon, where rooms are £42 a night.

❚ Coleen and Wayne Rooney spent £2000 a night on a suite at the seven-star Burj Al Arab hotel in Dubai for a room with a hot tub, where they could enjoy champagne and caviar while Coleen sported a £300 bikini. ❚ It cost MTV £6380 a week to rent the infamous house where the cast of Jersey Shore enjoyed their regular hottub frolics.

Need to send money between UK and home? r Cheapee than th banks*

*Source: 1st Contact survey of UK high street bank charges, April 2008.

0870-898 8996 tntforex.com TNTMAGAZINE.COM

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HOME

STYLE . £18

Space Invader alarm clock Wake up with childhood memories heals.co.uk

.9 £14

Moving on up Finsbury Park, N4

Up and coming: Finsbury Park High Street

WORDS CLARE VOOGHT

My scratch map The ultimate travel brag iwantoneofthose.com

.00 £18

Gold buillon USB mouse Bling up your computer heals.co.uk

.99 £27

Bodum bistro coffee grinder No excuses for being sleepy dunelm-mill.com

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First impressions of Finsbury Park aren’t forgiving – men on benches rambling about loves lost and run-down shops with closed shutters at midday don’t make an attractive picture of an area. And the rule that train stations are dodgy definitely applies here. But there’s far more to this area. Get two minutes’ walk away from the station and things relax. The city landscape is mottled with gastropubs, independent restaurants and pattisseries. And now the station area is getting a much-needed facelift – set to be finished in 15 years – estate agents actually can call it ‘up and coming’. To anyone put off moving to the area because of its dangerous image, Amanpreet Singh, from Ludlow Thompson estate agents in Blackstock Road, says: “Come and check it out. It may have a reputation, but it’s nothing like what people think it is. More people are moving here because it’s affordable but there’s also a lot of money coming in with new flats being built.” Like many areas tagged with the ‘up and coming’ label, Finsbury Park has workingclass roots. But now it’s attracting more and more young professionals and students in their twenties. Aside from the fact that it’s still dirt-cheap to live there, why is Finsbury Park getting so popular? Gary Anderson, from Michael Morris estate agents in Blackstock Road, says: “It’s not one of anything. It’s very mixed – the restaurants, the shops, the people – and people really like that. And once they’ve moved here, people generally tend

to stay longer.” Finsbury Park residents are spoiled for transport. Being slap-bang on the Victoria and Piccadilly lines, it’s easy to get to the city centre, and there are also trains out of London, to places such as Bedford and Cambridge, and, crucially, to Luton Airport, for escapes to sunnier spots. When you’re spending your weekends closer to home, there’s the sprawling Finsbury Park and Gillespie Park for jogging, plus plenty of pubs to reward yourself in after work. The Faltering Fullback in Perth Road (thefullback.co.uk) is the most talkedabout, with its three-tier outdoor decking, TV for sports and live music on Sundays. The World’s End in Stroud Green Road (capitalpubcompany.com/the-worlds-end) has

Explore Finsbury Park Monday-night poker sessions and The Silver Bullet, opposite the station (thesilverbullet. co.uk) is a sweaty alternative club, holding nights entitled Push It (old-school hip hop) and Black Cat (northern soul and ska).

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MY AREA MAX

CLILVERD Musician, 21

“The Stapleton [Crouch Hill] is great. It’s the rival to The Dairy across the road – a bit pretentious and gastro – but The Stapleton is really friendly.”

BEX

DAYNES Mum, 30

Stroud Green Road has its foodie gems. Ozay Has, from Future Homes, in the same street, says: “There’s pizza place called Pizzeria Pappagone, which has been there for years and there’s Petek Turkish restaurant, which is always full.” The critics’ choice is the constantly packed Dotori for cheap Korean and Japanese food, and the chilled-out, French-run Boulangerie Bon Matin on Tollington Park – best for reading the weekend papers with delicious coffee and patisserie goodies. So when you start looking for a place to lay your head, you’ll find London’s usual mix

of period conversions, bargainous ex-council flats and a burgeoning base of new apartments. Heading towards Highbury, Blackstock Road has some hot properties and Stroud Green Road is also quite sought-after as it’s far enough from the station but close enough to the action. Finsbury Park is starting to make NEXT WEEK its mark on the London map, so Nightmare landlords get in there while it’s still cheap.

“I like living here. There’s a sense of community and I bump into a lot of people. I like having coffee at Boulangerie Bon Matin and at The Front Room [in Tollington Park].”

ALICJA

NAUMIK Barista, 23

“I’ve only been working in Finsbury Park a week but my first impressions are good! I like the area and all the people are nice. The park is huge and really nice.”

N4 INFO BOROUGH

Islington COUNCIL TAX

Photos: Futurehomes-uk.com; michaelmorris.co.uk; TNT

£961.81 TRAVEL TIME TO LONDON

10mins FLATSHARE £650pcm

ONE-BEDROOM FLAT £910pcm

TWO-BEDROOM FLAT £1,300pcm

A first-floor ex-council maisonette with large rooms and a commmunal garden. The bright furnished flat has three bedrooms, a bathroom, lounge and kitchen.

A newly refurbished top-floor flat in a Victorian building just north of the park. With one bedroom, a large living room and a brand new kitchen/ diner.

A bright and airy first-floor flat on Gloucester Drive – a quiet street close to the park. Furnished, modern kitchen, laminate flooring and two good-sized bedrooms.

futurehomes-uk.com

michaelmorris.co.uk

TUBE

Finsbury Park Zone 2; Victoria Line AVERAGE ROOM SHARE 1 BED

£500pcm AVERAGE RENTAL 1 BED

£1000pcm AVERAGE FLAT 1 BED

£210,000

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WORLDVIEW

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Cheeky: bum deal for Saddam

SOLDIER GRABBED SADDAM’S ARSE UNITED KINGDOM A bronze buttock from the toppled statue of late Iraqi dictator Saddam Hussein is to be auctioned after a British soldier salvaged the piece of metal. “The US Marines had erected a cordon of tanks to guard the square. But I wanted a piece of the statue,” said Nigel “Spud” Ely, 52, who was part of the British SAS deployment in Baghdad in 2003. “I only wanted a piece big enough to put in my pocket, but I ended up with a chunk about two-foot square. I thought, ‘What the hell am I going to do with this?’ “I threw it in the back of my truck and forgot about it until we tried to re-enter Kuwait, where the Kuwaiti army arrested us and searched us for plunder.” Ely convinced them the buttock was part of his tank’s armour.

A bird? A plane? Or a shitload of surgery?: Filipino fashion designer Herbert Chavez is so obsessed with Superman that he has undergone several surgical procedures to enhance his likeness to the caped crusader. Chavez has had his nose thinned and a cleft made in his chin, as well as implants to bulk up his buttocks and hips

TWEETS OF THE WEEK @jimmycarr Shane Warne and Liz Hurley have got engaged. Rumour has it they can’t wait to be bride and over-groomed. @warne888 Just read online another ridiculous article about me telling EH to keep our wedding under a “million pound” Absolute rubbish & total crap! @Evil_Dumbledore Dear Blackberry, I think it’s nice that you’re honouring Steve Jobs’ death with a 3 day silence

FREAK ANTELOPE CRASH A YOUTUBE HIT SOUTH AFRICA A South African mountain biker has become an internet sensation after colliding spectacularly with an antelope during a race. 40

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Evan van der Spuy, 16, was competing in a weekend event in a wildlife park when the leaping hartebeest, which can weigh up to 350 pounds, crashed into him. Video taken by a fellow rider, positioned behind Van der Spuy, was posted on YouTube last week and had been viewed more than five million times within two days. It was the most shared and most viewed video in South Africa and the United States.

THROW A DWARF AND CREATE A NEW JOB UNITED STATES A Florida politician has

adopted a unique approach to job creation, introducing a bill to legalise the banned practice of dwarf-throwing. “In this economy, or any economy, why would we want to prevent people from getting gainful employment?” Republican Ritch Workman asked. Workman also called the decision to outlaw dwarf-tossing “an example of Big Brother government”. Dwarf-throwing is believed to have originated in Australia and generally involves people competing to throw dwarfs in padded clothing on to mattresses or at Velcro-coated walls.

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THIS WEEK

IN NUMBERS 50 Too drunk to drive, the Yeti set off for the long walk home from the pub

Cost, in pounds, of a portion of chips police bought to lure a fugitive down from a pylon – he ate them and then ran off

SCIENTISTS BANKING ON YETI DISCOVERY RUSSIA Russian officials claim they have discovered “indisputable evidence” Yetis exist and are living in Siberia, following an international expedition to gather evidence. Their claim appears to be based on bent branches, a single unclear footprint and a small sample of grey ‘hair’, found in a cave. Unsurprisingly, doubt has already been cast on the ‘find’ – as the team has no convincing photographic or DNA evidence. Despite this, Dr Igor Burtsev, leader of the event, claimed it would not be long before people everywhere acknowledged Yetis exist. “We are close to finally finding the Abominable Snowman,” he said, claiming Yetis are surviving Neanderthals.

TEARAWAY SHEEP RECALLS WELSH STAR

Photos: Getty, Thinkstock

NEW ZEALAND A sheep found wandering downtown Wellington could be nicknamed after Welsh rugby player Jonathan Davies after giving police the runaround. Officers had been called to Te Aro Park after “there were reports of a lone sheep in the area”. “The one found over the weekend is currently at the pound on lawnmower duty and will be re-homed after seven days if not claimed,” Wellington city council spokesman Richard MacLean said. “So far, the sheep has not yet been named but, because it was quite aggressive and an elusive runner, we think it should be called, in honour of Wales, Jonathan Davies.”

Years Nguyen Thi Phuong, 26, appeared to age in the space of a few days after an allergic reaction to seafood

100

Age of Fauja Singh, a British-Indian man known as the Turbaned Tornado and who is still completing marathons

Swiss people who have admitted having sexual relationships with animals, according to a recent disturbing survey

Rob Sloan: motored to the line

RUNNER CATCHES BUS TO FINISH LINE UNITED KINGDOM Long-distance runner Rob Sloan would have been happy with his bronze medal in a Northumberland marathon, until it emerged he hopped on a bus to the finish line. “I ran the whole race,” Sloan insisted initially. “I’m upset and angry that someone wants to cast these aspersions. “When I finished the race I was asked by the fourth person in the race: ‘Did you come third, because I don’t remember you passing us?’ “My words to him were, ‘Yeah, I passed you at approximately 18 miles on the damp’, I remember because you don’t pass many people being near the front.” Organisers weren’t fooled, though. Sloan had run a 10km race the day before the marathon, which apparently took its toll, making the short cut on the bus an irresistible temptation.

1.45

275,000

QUOTE OF THE WEEK I’m taking a sabbatical from her. I’m like Picasso, painting up the ladder after leaving his mistress at the bottom after a row Rolling Stone Ronnie Wood after splitting with his Brazilian girlfriend Ana Araujo, who is 30 years his junior

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TNT puts the world to rights

OURVIEW

COMMENT: REBECCA KENT rebecca.kent@tntmagazine.com

Lady Gaga: not exactly whiter than white

Ladies, don’t be shy. You can put out if you want to

Photos: Getty

Lady Gaga’s dud advice promotes an outdated double-standard Lady Gaga has been on her soapbox preaching to her female fans not to rush into sex with a potential partner because that’s how she plays the game. Young women should appreciate they can “honour their body” by not “putting out” too soon, she told the USA Today newspaper. “It’s always been important to me, as it’s for my generation, a most relevant consideration when you’re growing up. Sex doesn’t mean nothing; sex means so much.” She added: “A man will only respect you more for honouring your body. I am that way.” I’m sorry, but women can honour their bodies any way they like, whether sporting a vinyl suspender belt and shagging on the first date, or by guarding their chastity as though their lives depended on it. Lady Gaga is peddling the idea that sex should be a tool of empowerment, used by women to keep voracious men at bay and earn their respect in the process. But if a man chooses to think less of a woman who puts out from the get-go, then he should take a good look at his own kind first. Somehow, it’s more acceptable in our society for a man to bed a woman he hardly knows – this double-standard is unfair to girls. By abstaining in a potential relationship, women are hardly laying the groundwork for equal sexual footing should love flourish. Ladies, be sexual, shag if you want to, bonk safely, and if your heart flutters for one of your suitors, then you’ll both know at the time what to do about it. Besides all that, I don’t have much tolerance for sanctimonious sermons from a performer such as Gaga who is cashing in from the one thing she suggests we keep sacred. I give you the lyrics to her song, Animal: “You have that wild side/You’re an animal tonight/I see that you are my type ... I can see the way that you’re looking at me ... Baby I’ll keep you up all night/Gonna tie you up in case you bite.” Tsk tsk, Lady Gaga. Perhaps you should practice what you preach. You’d be much more fun. » Agree or disagree? Should women avoid putting out to earn respect? letters@tntmagazine.com

RYANAIR CAN GET RID OF LOOS As if flying with Ryanair isn’t an exercise in discomfort already, the budget airline is now whittling down the number of loos in each of their aircrafts to just one to make room for six more seats. It is a shrewd move from Michael O’Leary’s lot, who already cash in when passengers fall foul of their stubborn baggage and check-in policies. But I do admire their business nous. Yes, this latest move means next time I fly in one of their tin cans with wings, I’ll have to forego that last coffee before boarding, and I certainly won’t be getting

“

It’s a shrewd move from Michael O’Leary

”

on with a hangover ever again, should I find myself waiting in a queue for just one toilet to wipe the puke off myself. But, as long as the airline can continue to fly me to European destinations for much cheaper than it will ever cost me to see parts of the UK, they are sacrifices I’m more than prepared to make. TNTMAGAZINE.COM

Another clean-up begins Oil floods into New Zealand’s Bay of Plenty, adding to a long list of environmental ravages WORDS TOM STURROCK

It has already been confirmed as New Zealand’s worst environmental disaster. After the MV Rena, a container ship carrying thousands of tonnes of fuel, ran aground on the Astrolabe Reef off the North Island’s Tauranga coast, a leak in its hull created a 5km oil slick. An expensive cleanup operation is in full swing, jumpsuited workers are now shovelling nuggets of tar off the sands of the country’s pristine beaches. There are, though, fears the crisis could grow even more serious should the Rena snap in two. Of course, the events in New Zealand are by no means unprecedented. They are merely the latest in a long line of disasters which seem to be the cost of doing business in an industrialised world.

Bhopal 1984 When a pesticide plant in central India, owned by chemical company Union Carbide, sprung a leak, a cloud of chemical vapour suffused into the atmosphere in Bhopal, where residents suffered vomiting, severe eye irritation and a feeling of suffocation. In the immediate aftermath, 170,000 people were treated in hospitals and temporary clinics. There were mass cremations to dispose of dead bodies, and within a few days, leaves on trees fell off while food became scarce due to safety fears. Long-term, those exposed to the gas developed problems with their lungs, kidneys and livers, while the stillbirth rate increased by as much as 300 per cent.

Deepwater Horizon 2010 Last year, the Deepwater Horizon oil rig, operated by BP, exploded after an accident during drilling, resulting in the biggest oil spill in history. In the following months, nearly five million barrels of crude oil were released, devastating the ecology of the coastline along the Gulf of Mexico and the Mississippi Delta. BP set up a $20bn (£12.7bn) fund to compensate victims, so far paying out about $5bn (£3.2bn) 44

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to almost 200,000 claimants. Last month, the US government published its final report on the accident, identifying a defective cement job as the main cause of the explosion and the subsequent spill.

Mad Cow disease 1993 Mad Cow disease, or Bovine Spongiform Encephalopathy (BSE), affects cattle’s brains, spinal cords and internal organs and is caused by feeding cows a high-protein substance made from butchered sheep and cows. Regular cow feed is made of soybeans, but the ‘blood and bone’ substance was used as a substitute. BSE was first discovered in British cattle in 1986 – an outbreak later theorised to have been caused by the importation of cow feed from India – but reached epidemic proportions in the early Nineties. The outbreak spread to Europe and, in 1996, the European Union placed a 10-year ban on British beef, after it emerged its animal feed did not undergo a steam boiling process for sterilisation.

The Great Smog 1952 An exceptionally cold London winter led to increased coal combustion, which created an air-borne combination of black soot, sticky particles of tar and gaseous sulphur dioxide. The smoke particles trapped in the fog gave it a yellow-black colour and the sulphur dioxide created an intense form of acid rain. Visibility dropped to a few metres and transport became largely impossible – motor vehicles were abandoned, trains disrupted and airports shut down. The smog episode killed about 12,000 people, mostly children, the elderly and those with existing respiratory conditions.

Seveso 1976 An explosion ripped through a chemical plant in Meda, Italy, releasing a toxic cloud of TCDD, a poisonous dioxin, into the atmosphere. Seveso, a small village downwind from

Clockwise: the victms of Bhopal; the side-effects of Chernobyl; otters poisoned by oil from the Exxon Valdez

the plant, was the area most grievously affected, although 11 communities were also contaminated, along a densely populated 6km stretch. Seveso victims developed chloracne – cysts and pustules on their skin – as a result. But the most disturbing aspect of the Seveso accident was that authorities had no idea the plant was a source of risk. The European Directive was created to prevent such ignorance in the future and to enhance industrial safety.

Chernobyl 1986 A fire at the Chernobyl nuclear reactor in Ukraine led to vast amounts of radioactive material being released into the atmosphere. Immediately following the accident, thousands were diagnosed with radiation sickness. Estimates of the death toll vary – some unofficial counts exceed 400,000. People who lived near the plant suffer disproportionately from various health problems. In Belarus, the incidence of thyroid cancer increased 2400 per cent, while birth defects in children of Chernobyl victims occurred at 250 per cent of the normal rate. Even today, it is believed more than four million people in the Ukraine, Belarus and western Russia still live on contaminated ground.

Photos: Getty

Exxon Valdez 1989 When the American oil tanker Exxon Valdez struck the Bligh Reef in Prince William Sound, to the west of Alaska, the resulting oil spill polluted 1900km of coastline and killed 250,000 sea birds. Exxon Mobil, the tanker’s owner, has paid more than $3.5bn (£2.3bn) in reparations for the accident, of which $2.1bn (£1.3bn) was allocated to ongoing clean-up operations. The remote location of the oil spill, though, exposed shortcomings in official response plans. In 2009, 20 years after the initial catastrophe, studies revealed the ecosystem and region would feel the effects for a further 30 years.

NO MORE DRILLING GREENIES WANT BAN New Zealand’s leading environmental groups have seized on the Rena spill to call for a moratorium on deep sea oil drilling. The Forest and Bird Protection Society and Greenpeace have urged the government to rethink its plans to expand offshore oil and gas drilling. The society’s advocacy manager, Kevin Hackwell, says the disaster raises “serious questions” about how prepared the government was for such a catastrophe. “Authorities were unable to prevent New Zealand’s worst ever maritime environmental disaster unfolding from a grounding of a ship close to New Zealand’s busiest port,” Hackwell said. “Clearly we would not have the resources to cope with a major oil spill involving an oil tanker running aground or as a result of an oil drilling accident offshore.”

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Johnathan Thurston

THURSTON READY TO TAKE LOCKYER’S SPOT RUGBY LEAGUE Ahead of Darren Lockyer’s farewell international tour, Kangaroos halfback Johnathan Thurston has put his hand up to replace him as Queensland and Australian five-eighth. “There’s a Test match before the Origin series, so if that’s the way the Australian and Queensland selectors want to go, and providing my form is good enough to warrant selection, I’ll play in the six jumper,” Thurston said. “I moved to the Bulldogs as a six and I went to the Cowboys as a six, so I’m very familiar with the role. No doubt, if I get that opportunity to play in the six for Australia and Queensland, I’ll try and do that jersey proud.”

THOMPSON ADMITS HE STILL LOVES GEELONG

Are your hiccups gone yet?: Kohei Uchimura of Japan competes on the vault during the Artistic Gymnastics World Championship in Tokyo. These guys are exceptional athletes, no doubt, but doesn’t emphasising that their sport is artistic diminish the kudos a little bit? If someone played artistic rugby, how much respect would they get?

AUSTRALIAN RULES Two-time premiership coach Mark Thompson’s resignation at the end of last year caused a lot of bad blood at Geelong, but Thompson has never stopped loving the Cats. Thompson, who is entering his second pre-season as Essendon’s assistant coach, admitted he was barracking with all his might for his former side in the 2011 grand final, where they defeated reigning premiers Collingwood. “I never deviated all year. I thought they were absolutely fantastic,” he said. “I was barracking for them so hard. I’m so proud.” Thomspon also suggested that other clubs, including Essendon, where he spent his playing career, would be looking to follow Geelong’s example. “If you’re looking for a model, that’s the model that you’d want,” he said. 46

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COULD BRISBANE CUT IT IN EUROPE?

BIG WEEK FOR ...

FOOTBALL

Hashim Amla has taken over the captaincy of South Africa’s limited-overs cricket sides. He’s got a couple of T20s under his belt now, but the 50-over stuff starts this week. Amla has an exceptional record but it will be interesting to see how he copes with having former captain Graeme Smith in the side. Smith is still in charge in Tests but, unlike Ricky Ponting, who is playing on under Michael Clarke, Smith is still only 30, which is prime ‘captaincy age’.

Brisbane Roar have made the early running in the new A-League season, with some pundits suggesting they are the best side the league has seen. But FFA technical director, Han Berger, went further, saying Brisbane would be capable of competing in the top flight in his native Netherlands. “They would be able to survive,” Berger said. “That would be a realistic assessment – they are certainly better than the bottom six in the Eredivisie.” Berger is not a bad judge. Before arriving in Australia three years ago, he worked at eight different clubs in Holland, coaching in 657 top-flight games.

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QUOTES OF THE WEEK I thought to myself, ‘I have to do something courageous and epic. I have to throw a hot dog on the green’ Brandon Kelly explains his motivation for throwing a hot dog at Tiger Woods at a golf tournament in California

The one positive is that I won’t ever have to be reffed by Bryce Lawrence again

Nani starred in the Community Shield

PREVIEW Who’s top dog in Manchester? MANCHESTER UNITED V MANCHESTER CITY SUNDAY 1PM, SKY SPORTS 1 Manchester derbies always have an edge to them but, with United and City occupying the top two spots on the table, this weekend’s showdown is of rare significance. City are no longer the poor cousin in Manchester – on the contrary, they are very, very rich – but it remains to be seen whether they have the mettle to topple United, to usurp them as Premier League champions. City beat United in an FA semi-final in April before squandering a 2-0

lead in the Community Shield, the season’s curtain-raiser played in August, eventually losing 3-2 after a stirring United fightback. In the league, though, United have still been able to hold sway, winning five of the past six derbies and drawing the other. Not since Februrary 2008 have City prevailed in a Premier League fixture. So the stage is set for the most eagerly awaited clash between the two clubs in a generation. Bragging rights are up for grabs. If City take the points, United’s “noisy neighbours”, as Sir Alex Ferguson once called them, will be fit to bring the house down.

THE CHAT | Rooney to miss Euro 2012?

Retiring Springboks captain John Smit takes a parting shot at the Kiwi referee in charge of the Saffas’ loss to Australia

The basic skills of rugby at that level just aren’t good enough and I haven’t seen an improvement in the last three-and-a-half years Fran Cotton, the man reviewing English rugby, has been underwhelmed by Martin Johnson’s performance as head coach

TV HIGHLIGHTS

Photos: Getty

CRICKET Rooney will be banned for the group Q Wayne stages of England’s campaign – is Fabio Capello seriously considering leaving him at home? – it’s tough talk and all part of Capello’s ‘no player A No is bigger than the team’ ethos. Certainly, Rooney has put his manager in a tough position – should England make it all the way to the final, Rooney would be available for the last three matches only. But Rooney remains England’s best player and their only truly world-class striker. Imagine if England make it past the group stage, as they should, and then find themselves in a sudden-death match against Germany or France, but don’t have their best player to call upon. He’s too important to England’s chances at the pointy end to leave out.

South Africa v Australia The ODI series kicks off Wednesday 1.30pm, Sky Sports 3

CRICKET India v England The third of five ODIs Thursday 9.30am, Sky Sports 1

RUGBY UNION World Cup final Wayne Rooney

Definitely worth getting up early for Sunday 9am, ITV1 TNTMAGAZINE.COM

SPORTVIEW

TNT puts the world to rights

COMMENT: JAHN VANNISSELROY

A World Cup without the All Blacks would hardly be worth playing

New Zealand puts the frighteners on the IRB

No one wants to see the top teams missing from 2015 World Cup

» Agree or disagree? Can you imagine a World Cup without NZ? letters@tntmagazine.com 50

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SORRY HAYE NEVER READY TO RUMBLE Boxer David Haye retired the other day. Good riddance. His disappointing effort against Wladimir Klitschko summed Haye up: all mouth. He failed to front up in the fight of his life and then blamed a broken toe for his appalling performance. The terrible showing was not helped by the fact that, pre-bout, he had strolled around wearing a T-shirt featuring him holding the decapitated heads of Wladimir and his brother, Vitali. Afterwards, Haye was subjected to a verbal pummelling at the press conference. Klitschko, who had remained dignified throughout the whole ordeal, rubbed salt

“

Unfortunately, David Haye was all mouth

”

in his opponent’s wounds, translating his own answers and delivering each insult in English, German and Ukrainian. Sadly for Haye, it will be the defining memory of his career for many: a bit-player in one of the most entertaining boxing press conferences since Muhammad Ali was in action.

Photos: Getty

It was about time someone stood up to the International Rugby Board. New Zealand, Australia and South Africa last week refused to participate in a board meeting with rugby’s powers-that-be unless the current World Cup financial model was considered for change. When NZ boss Steve Tew first raised the issue of the All Blacks potentially being unable to afford to compete in 2015 in England, due to the loss of money from being unable to showcase their sponsors and revenue loss from a truncated Four Nations tournament, the IRB assumed it was all bluff and bluster. A negotiating stunt, if you like. “Everyone is replaceable,” scoffed IRB chief executive Mike Miller, prompting a collective gasp from the rest of the world. Miller, further demonstrating a colonialist arrogance already on show when fining developing nation Samoa £10,000 for a player wearing an incorrect mouthguard and forcing minnows to play with a reduced recovery window, had put his foot right in it. A tournament without the sport’s premier team would have been a disaster. Like in football, when neutral fans will tune in to Brazil’s games, the All Blacks attract admirers from all corners. Then, when the Springboks and Wallabies stood firm behind their onfield rivals, Miller was forced to backtrack and add the issue to the agenda of a recent IRB meeting. Detailed recommendations will now be put forward to the board’s executive in December. The timing of the Sanzar nations’ move, like a perfectly executed backline counterattack, was crucial. The IRB is eager to start planning the 2015 event, and is acutely aware it will have to book football stadium years in advance. The refusal of the southern teams to commit delays this process and throws a spanner in the works. It also shows that, as they do on the field, New Zealand can play hardball off it. But Milller should be thankful. A World Cup without three top teams and his phrase, “Everyone is replaceable”, would have been ringing in his ears as he cleared out his desk at IRB HQ.

jahn.vannisselroy@tntmagazine.com

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The pick of the bunch The World Cup has nearly run its course – what have been the tournament’s highlights? WORDS TOM STURROCK

With only the decider still to be played, the Rugby World Cup is nearly done and dusted for another four years. Undoubtedly, it is the events of this weekend’s final that will come to define the tournament but there have already been plenty of thrills and spills – nailbiting finishes, spectacular plays and some generous helpings of bitter disappointment.

Find of the tournament: Manu Tuilagi England’s campaign never gathered any momentum – they looked for all money like a side devoid of inspiration, one that would be beaten by the first decent side they came up against. And so it proved, with their ignominious loss to France. But, in Tuilagi, England have unearthed a star, a power-packed wrecking ball of a player, who, at 20, still has his best rugby ahead of him. Tuilagi’s five brothers have all represented Samoa but it appears England got the one they wanted. Given Tuilagi only made his international debut in August, he has adapted to Test rugby with remarkable speed and appeared to be the only England player who was up for it during the side’s feckless first half against France. The silver lining from an otherwise bleak performance.

Try of the tournament: Danie van Wyk There’s been a fair bit of grumbling throughout the tournament about the role of the minnows – they show up, get smashed by the big boys in an overly long group stage, before the top eight sides predictably go through to the knockout stage. But when an emerging nation gets it right, it’s exhilarating. Namibia were soundly beaten by Samoa but there was one audacious passage that demonstrated the spectacular appeal of the minnows – without the water-tight defences of the top sides, they play attacking rugby. So it was when, against the run of play, Namibian winger Llewellyn Winkler executed a deft chip off the back of a ruck in his own half, then quickly regathered his own ball and sent 52

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a neat pass across to centre Danie van Wyk, who raced 35 metres to score.

Upset of the tournament: Tonga v France Australia’s surprise loss to Ireland was of greater consequence, as it cost the Wallabies top spot in their group and sent them instead into the same side of the draw as South Africa and New Zealand, but for sheer boilovers, Tonga knocking over France 19-14 (main image) takes the cake. Indeed, it was one of the biggest shocks in the history of the tournament. Tonga’s ballistic, physical approach served a timely reminder of the Pacific Islanders’ contribution to a tournament that would be poorer for their absence and, equally, the fact France rebounded to eliminate England proved, once again, they are the most mercurial side in world rugby.

Biggest disappointment: Dan Carter’s injury Australian fans have been unimpressed with Quade Cooper’s performances but New Zealanders went into mourning when Dan Carter, their superstar flyhalf, was ruled out of the tournament with a groin injury. And, while other sides might have rubbed their hands at the prospect of a weakened All Blacks outfit, the tournament was deprived of one of its stars. Given the World Cup is meant to be the pinnacle of the sport, Carter’s absence was a loss not only to Kiwis but to the tournament’s status as a celebration of rugby. Carter was denied the chance to cement his place in All Blacks folklore by lifting the Webb Ellis trophy in front of an adoring home crowd. Will he be around in 2015? Who knows?

Funniest gaffe: England’s whole campaign The signs were bad when the players decided to hit the turps in between games and the English press went to town on their frequenting a Queenstown bar where the entertainment included dwarf-throwing. Captain Mike

Clockwise: Dan Carter before being injured; Marc Lièvremont; Manu Tuilagi

Tindall was caught canoodling with a woman other than his wife, before two of the team’s support staff were banned for ball-tampering. And then, after being knocked out, Manu Tuilagi got in hot water after jumping overboard from a ferry. In isolation, none of these is disastrous but, when added up, they amount to a campaign that appeared rudderless from the beginning.

Worst facial hair: Lièvremont’s moustache Canadian flanker Adam Kleeberger showed up at the World Cup with a beard – an unruly, ginger shock of fuzz that made him resemble one of the Ents from Lord Of The Rings – but it’s impossible to overlook the unsettling, pencil moustache sported by French coach Marc Lièvremont, apparently without irony. Lièvremont’s facial hair is so lacking in substance that it’s possible to overlook it initially – ‘is that … is that a silly, little moustache?’ – before closer inspection reveals the true horror of the coach’s facial hair. The only explanation is that Lièvremont lost a bet before the tournament.

Photos: Getty

Most surprising performance: De Villiers resigns When Peter de Villiers replaced Jake White four years ago, many in South Africa were baffled. White has just steered the Springboks to victory at the World Cup and De Villiers already had a reputation as a difficult, enigmatic fellow. De Villiers quickly established a record of controversial public statements, often shooting from the hip, with a decidedly scatter-gun approach, on the topic of race, yet still offered weirdly ambiguous sympathy for Bees Roux, a white South African rugby player charged with murdering a black policeman. So the real shock came when, in the act of standing down as Boks coach after his team’s loss to Australia, De Villiers gave a dignified, measured speech expressing gratitude for his time in charge. Fancy that.

The Wallabies celebrate after beating South Africa

FRIENDS WITH MONEY SOUTHERN POCKETS EMPTY In the background of this tournament, a to-and-fro over World Cup revenue has been simmering between the IRB and the southern powerhouses, Australia, New Zealand and South Africa. Although it seems far-fetched, the respective unions have even threatened to pull out of the 2015 World Cup in England unless steps are taken to reimburse losses incurred by their participation. The Aussies, Kiwis and Saffas claim they sacrifice millions of pounds in income and are insisting the 2015 tournament be scheduled later in the year to ensure in doesn’t interfere with the Four Nations – which will by then include Argentina. They also want the IRB to relax its sponsorship restrictions and revise the way it divides revenue between the countries involved. The IRB, though, insists a bigger slice of the pie for established nations would divert funds from development.

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SUPPORT LUNG HEALTH A man gets more than he bargained for as he reads the morning papers. The woman unveiled her chest to show support for lung health at Wynyard Railway Station in Sydney, Australia. Research has revealed one in three Australians aged over 35 have experienced symptoms of poor lung health.

Photos: Aaron Millar, Anna Maria Espsäter, Getty, Andorra Tourist Board

INSIDE

MOST HAUNTED? /58

THE OTHER TENERIFE /66

POUND THE POWDER /72

Oxford Castle may be home to a centuriesold crypt and an old prison wing, but is it haunted by ghosts? Maybe ...

Long regarded a beach-and-booze destination for sunburnt Brits, this Canary Island has a secret – its outdoor adventure

’Tis the season to get sporty. Here’s our pick of the slopes – for any skill level and every budget, from relaxing stays to boozy breaks TNTMAGAZINE.COM

TRAVELDIARY Laura Chubb ACTING TRAVEL EDITOR

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Fantasy Fest opens with a Caribbean street party

SCARE EASY? The news that a Libyan tour operator is offering a three-day trip to ‘post-war Libya’ as gun battles continue to rage around the country is one of the more extreme examples I’ve heard when it comes to a nation’s desperation to win back holidaymakers.

FANTASY FEST Key West, Florida, US A carnival of camp in sizzling hot Florida, the Fantasy Fest is really just an excuse to play dress up. Ten days of street parties and parades are 21-30 attended by mermaids, ghouls, cavemen and even Dungeons-&Dragons-meets-leather-fetish fans. Yeesh. Events this year will feature a burlesque-dancing-dragon and a headdress contest. Expect sleazy/fun madness. OCT

WHY: It all started in 1979 to liven up a quiet period for the tourist industry, apparently. And boy, has that target been met. Now it’s the festival for freaks and geeks to let loose and party. Boozy bashes are in abundance throughout – there’s even a Bloody Mary Blow Out Breakfast.

ISLE OF WIGHT WALKING FESTIVAL Isle of Wight, UK

Choose from more than 60 guided walks at the Isle’s 21-24 weekend-long celebration of an autumnal stroll. Singles should seek out the Speed Dating Walk on October 23. Anyone in need of some zen can try the Tai Chi Walk on October 22. OCT

isleofwightwalkingfestival.co.uk

JIDAI MATSURI Kyoto, Japan

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MOULID OF SAYYED AHMED AL-BADAWI Tanta, Egypt

Anyone with a snake phobia should avoid this, one of 21-24 Egypt’s most religious festivals, where many a cobra is charmed out of a basket. In honour of a Moroccan Sufi (Islamic mystic) who battled the crusaders’ invasion of Egypt, millions of pilgrims from across the Arab world descend on this town, 90km from Cairo. The masses then chant themselves into a trance. OCT

joobili.com

To commemorate the founding of Kyoto, 22 thousands of people parade in period costumes spanning 1000 years of Japanese history. Lonely Planet calls it “a museum on legs”. It takes two hours to watch everyone pass. OCT

japan-guide.com

DO IT BECAUSE: You want to get your flamboyant on and create an outrageous outfit. You also respond well to dancing in the street. Wallflowers, people who never make an effort at fancy dress parties and tee-totallers are not encouraged.

LES AMIS DU VENT Calvi, France OCT

26-30

Kites, balloons, hang-gliders and sculptures celebrate the freedom of the breeze.

lefestivalduvent.com

Photos: Getty

Sherwes Travel is advertising a three-day ‘short break’ for €295, amid claims that “this fabulous country is opening up to visitors”. The itinerary includes a walking tour of Tripoli. Interested? See sherwestravel.com. Disclaimer: I in no way recommend it. However, while I could probably name a couple of more relaxing places to take a break than Libya right now, I do sympathise with countries in which the tourist industry has taken a hit owing to events wildly beyond their control. Take the Middle East. Following the Arab Spring, once-popular destinations such as Jordan have seen a disastrous decline in visitors – even though travel to Jordan is not perceived to be dangerous. (The Foreign and Commonwealth Office merely advises avoiding public demonstrations if any occur.) Japan is another example. The twin natural disasters of the earthquake and tsunami in March, which then triggered a potential nuclear meltdown, have kept tourists at bay. (See P57 for how desperate Japan is to win travellers back.) But really, there is no greater danger to visiting most areas of Japan than there was this time last year. Just steer clear of the northeastern regions worst affected by the events of March, and don’t book yourself a tour of Fukushima Nuclear Power Plant. There is always an element of risk to travel – as there is every time you walk out the front door. Be sensible, but don’t let it frighten you off.

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REALITY CHECK-IN Reality TV shows including X Factor, Made In Chelsea and Geordie Shore, pictured, are driving up the popularity of holiday destinations visited in the programmes, according to figures from cheapflights.co.uk. The price comparison site reported an 89 per cent jump in searches for Mykonos in Greece after X Factor judge Tulisa Contostavlos took contestants there to sing for a place in the live rounds of the TV talent show. Searches for Cannes rocketed 39 per cent after it appeared on Made In Chelsea. Unfortunately, the trend isn’t necessarily introducing travellers to the classiest holidays. Interest in Magaluf increased four per cent thanks to Geordie Shore.

Photos: MTV

10,000 FREE FLIGHTS Japan is planning to offer 10,000 free flights to travellers in an attempt to win back tourism following this year’s devastating tsunami and earthquake, which triggered a potential nuclear disaster. The Japan Tourism Agency will ask would-be visitors to submit online applications for freebies, and those selected will be obliged to write a report about their trip. Subject to government approval, the free flights could go on offer as early as April. The number of foreign tourists travelling to Japan plummeted more than 50 per cent during the three months that followed the disaster in March.

ON THE GO BARGAINS Travelzoo has launched an iPhone app that utilises GPS to locate the closest deals to the user. The ‘Locate Deals Near Me’ function means savvy travellers can bag bargains while on the go. The app also allows users to redeem deal vouchers on their iPhone rather than printing them off. Travelzoo UK’s managing director Joel Brandon-Bravo said: “People can now travel from city to city and take advantage of the function. Users could be standing in the middle of New York, and still find the best deals close to them at that very moment.” Which will come in handy in an expensive city such as the Big Apple.

HAVE A BASH AT THIS A new travel company aimed at “sociable young adults” has launched in the UK. AdventureBASH offers “unforgettable group adventures, tasteful lively skiing trips, mountain biking events, sailing holidays and surf camps” with the promise of “no tacky tours or cocky teenagers”. Packages on offer include six days’ guided mountain biking around Slovenia for £670, including full board, an opening barbecue party, whitewater rafting and wine tasting; and seven days’ skiing in Morzine from £428, including an opening party, snow picnic and Eighties fancy dress night. More at adventurebash.com

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Paranormal activity: Oxford Castle was once a prison

EAT, DRINK, SLEEP

Oxford Castle

ENGLAND

OXFORD, ENGLAND WALES

Oxford

The Black Boy gastro pub offers award-winning food at reasonable prices. Specials include the likes of scallops with caviar, and braised lamb shoulder with gnocchi and red wine jus. (theblackboy.uk.com)

LONDON

GETTING THERE Take a train from London Paddington to Oxford (1hr) for £21.50 off-peak return with Southern Railways (southernrailway.com).

For real convenience there are a host of restaurants within the Castle complex itself. Old favourites including Prezzo, La Tasca and Pizza Express abound. Should take the edge off the spook factor ... (oxfordcastle.com) For steeling those nerves, you can’t beat the waterfront location at The Head of the River. (headoftheriver.co.uk) If your ghost hunt has fired up your investigative passions, then why not check out The Turf Tavern – the local of legendary fictitious detective Inspector Morse? (turftavern.co.uk) For a bed with a difference, Oxford Prison Hotel is a converted prison in the grounds of Oxford Castle itself and is well worth the extra pennies. Double rooms start at £200pn. (oxfordprison.co.uk)

Dialling the dead: a Ouija board 58

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For something a little more budget conscious, Central Backpackers has a location that lives up to the name. Dorms start at £19pppn. (centralbackpackers. co.uk)

UKTRIP

Most haunted? Oxford Castle may be home to a centuries-old crypt. But is it haunted by ghosts? Maybe...

Photos: Aaron Millar, Mark Bassett

WORDS AARON MILLAR

I am in the crypt of Oxford Castle, holding hands in a circle of strangers while a medium calls the spirits of the dead to come forward and make themselves known. To say this is not your normal Saturday night would be to grossly understate the obvious. But then Haunted Happenings – the team who have invited me on this evening’s paranormal investigation – definitely don’t do normal. Hosting weekly hunts in haunted locations around the country, they also, I am assured, don’t do hoaxes. And perhaps, in this 900-year-old crypt, they don’t have to. Built by the Normans in 1071, Oxford Castle was used as a prison for more than 700 years and, as such, houses many a tale of suffering and torture within its stone walls. But it is down here in the dark recesses of the crypt – long used as a storage place for the dead – that things feel decidedly spooky. We’re even hoping one or two of those old souls will deign to speak with us tonight. The evening begins with host Wayne instructing us in the use of various ghost-hunting devices – dowsing rods, EMF meters, K2 meters – all of which apparently register changes in the electro-magnetic field that might indicate the presence of something otherworldly. Then it’s lights off and downstairs for our first vigil – a séance in the crypt. “I’ve got a sense of something not right, like I’m going insane,” medium Bill Nicholson says from the centre of our circle, somewhat dramatically. “A man in spirit has come towards me, he says his name is Jacob.” We’re instructed to break the circle and hold our hands out in front of us. “Jacob, if you’re there,” Bill continues, “can you reach out and touch one of our hands?” In the pitch darkness not even fingertips are visible, shapes move around in the shadows, and I feel as if someone is peering over my shoulder. “Oh God, do we have to?” the woman next to me whispers; she hasn’t let go of my hand once and I’m glad for it. Upstairs from the crypt is the abandoned prison wing of the castle. Co-host Matt – a self-confessed ghost junkie – leads a small group of us into a tiny padded cubicle used to house the most violent criminals, including kidnapper and murderer Donald Neilson, the notorious ‘Black Panther’. (The British serial killer was given his nickname by the wife of a victim who said Neilson was so quick, he was like a

panther. Neilson was finally captured in 1975, around a year after his first murder, and sentenced to life imprisonment.) As we spread a Ouija board on the floor, we suddenly hear footsteps in the corridor that disappear as quickly as they arrived. “That’s got to be flesh and blood,” Matt says, standing up to check outside the cell door … but the building is empty and we never hear the footsteps again. Later, we kneel beside a small wooden table and place our hands lightly on its surface. Within minutes the table is vibrating under our fingertips, and then tilting on two legs,

“

I’ve got a sense of something not right

”

rocking slowly back and forth. It is startling, to say the least. Even in the dark I can see Wayne’s huge smile. “No matter how much I do this,” he says. “I’m still like a kid in a sweet shop when it starts to happen.” And perhaps, I wonder, that’s also where the real magic of a Haunted Happening lies. Not everything is convincing, and long stretches of inactivity can at times feel like little more than paying to sit around in the dark. But, strangely, that doesn’t really seem to bother me. In a world that is increasingly demystified by the hard facts of science, to explore a place where anything could still be possible, to be a child in the dark again, is a unique and exciting experience. And who knows … the haunted NEXT WEEK happenings I’ve witnessed this evening might even be genuine. We keep it spooky with Whitby Goth I’m not quite sure whether l would Festival. Yikes. prefer that to be true or not. ❚

Haunted Happenings runs regular ghost hunts at Oxford Castle and other locations around the country. Prices start from £45pp. See hauntedhappenings.co.uk for more information.

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Three nights in Venice is £149 with Travelbag

DEAL OF THE WEEK LUXURY ROME

£152

A two-night stay at Rome’s four-star Beverly Hills hotel with easyJet Holidays (0843 1041000; easyJet.com/holidays). Includes B&B and return flights. Departs November 20.

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MOROCCO A 12-day tour of Morocco is £314pp (save 50 per cent) with Travel Talk (0208 0998852; traveltalktours.com). Visiting Casablanca, Rabat, Fes, Erfoud, Ouarzazate, Marrakech, Essaouira, Agadir and more. Includes four-star accommodation, transfers, breakfasts, and guide. Excludes flights and local payment. Book by October 30; departs May 12, May 26, and June 9. DUBAI A four-night trip to Dubai is £389pp (save £250) with Flight Centre (0844 8008628; flightcentre.co.uk). Includes four nights’ three-star, B&B accommodation and flights. Based on two sharing. Book by October 31; valid for travel November 1-30. EGYPT A six-day tour of Egypt is £279 (save £50) with On the Go (020 73711113; onthegotours. com). Visiting Cairo and Luxor. Excludes flights. Departs October 25.

> £500 JAPAN A 14-day tour of Japan is £1680pp (save 20 per cent) with GAP Adventures (0844 2720000; gapadventures.com). Includes Takayama’s Folk Village, Kyoto’s historic centre, Kanazawa Castle, a ‘Ninja’ Temple, the sacred shrines of Mount Fuji and Tokyo. Includes transportation, accommodation and some meals. Departs from Tokyo October 31 (flights to Tokyo from UK not included). THAILAND A 10-night trip to Phuket is £899pp with Travelbag (0871 7034240; travelbag.co.uk). Includes 10 nights’ four-star, B&B accommodation and return flights. Valid for travel throughout November. SOUTH-EAST ASIA A 14-day Asian Adventure tour is £1045pp (save £163) with Contiki (0845 0750990; contiki.com). Visiting Thailand, Laos and Cambodia. Includes local payment. Book by October 24; departs November 30.

DAILY TRAVEL DEALS GO TO tntmagazine.com/travel/latedeals where new travel deals are updated daily. There are more than 30 deals live at any time. Also sign up for TNT’s weekly travel newsletter, which will be emailed to you every Wednesday with the most up-to-date deals and guides to over 170 destinations. Sign up at tntmagazine.com/travelemail.

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VENICE A three-night trip to Venice is £149pp with Travelbag (0871 7034240; travelbag.co.uk). Includes three-star accommodation and return flights. Departs November 16. HOLLAND AND BELGIUM A three-day tour of Holland and Belgium is £99pp with Anderson Tours (020 74369304; andersontours.co.uk). Includes two night’s B&B accomodation, dinner buffets, free evening bar, return travel, and sightseeing. Departs October 21. EGYPT A nine-day Felucca Odyssey tour is £144pp with Travel Talk (0208 0998852; traveltalktours. com). Visiting Cairo, Pyramids, Sphinx, and more. Includes accommodation, airport transfers, some meals, and guides. Excludes flights and local payment. Book by October 30; departs January 14, January 21 and January 28. LANZAROTE A seven-night trip to Lanzarote is £159pp with lowcostholidays.com (0800 1116271). Includes three-star, selfcatering accommodation (based on three sharing), and return flights. Departs November 17. RUSSIA A six-day tour of Russia is £239pp with with Travel Talk (0208 0998852; traveltalktours.com). Includes three-star accommodation, airport transfers, and guide. Excludes flights and local payment. Book by October 30; departs April 7.

£250 – £500

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LAILA PACHECO

HOTSHOTS WINNER

Talks travel photography

FLAME-GRILLED FISH Andrew Bulled, New Zealand

WHY IT WORKS Andrew has captured a great candid moment. The side-on approach really works and the reused coke bottle and mismatched plates all add to the allure and quirkiness. The blue tone and shafts of light from the sun act as a spotlight to the vendor’s hands as he fans the food he is papering. The blur of the fan has added movement to the image.

RUNNER-UP PANORAMAGIQUE BALLOON AT DISNEYLAND PARIS Jodie Harvey, New Zealand

WHY IT WORKS Leaving so much of the ground in shot gives perspective to just how high in the sky the hot air balloon is: the top of the trees are dwarfed by the big, blue sky and the twinkle of lights below. The fire inside the ballon, give a fairytale glow. A great shot captured by Jodie.

RUNNER-UP

WINNER

HOT TIPS: Shafts of light Shafts of light in your images can create a really dramatic feel. If you are lucky enough to come across this lighting effect, capturing it won’t be too difficult. A highcontrast environment would be an easy option and you can also underexpose your whole image. Avoid using your flash, as this will bring the two lights together and eliminate the shaft. Seeing dust in the

light rays will bring a favourable quality to your image as it helps emphasise the shaft. This type of light is often created through clouds when photographing landscape images; the more holes in the clouds, the more beams will be seen. If you are indoors, the light can be shown breaking through windows, as this will also create the spotlight effect.

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Upload your images to tntmagazine.com/hotshots First prize is a three-day tour of Scotland for two worth £218 from Haggis Adventures (haggisadventures.com). Must be taken within three months of receiving prize letter. The runner-up wins a £60 photography course voucher from Nigel Wilson Photography (photographycourses.org.uk).

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TOP FIVE

PARTY TOWNS

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BEIRUT, LEBANON

Cosy Castello

OSTE DEL CASTELLO OVERVIEW In the medieval village of Verucchio, a pretty pocket of cobbled streets near Rimini in Italy, Oste Del Castello is a small, friendly four-star converted from an 18thcentury building. In keeping with the village’s history, the hotel’s interior is all medieval-style stone walls, giving off a feeling of staying in a castle – only one with a spa and an expansive wine cellar. WOW FACTOR Probably the ‘wellness centre’, a sort of luxurious grotto sporting Jacuzzis, rainforest showers and plunge pools drenched in atmospheric lighting and framed within mock-ancient stone walls. ROOMS It all depends on which floor you’re allocated. In the main building, rooms are large and rendered in warm colours, with comfy sofas to boot. However, an extension added in 2009 means some rooms are located down a stony corridor away from the main part of the hotel. Here, your space will be smaller and a stark white/ cream colour scheme feels a little cold. There’s no change to the good level of comfort, though, and all rooms come with Sky TV. BILL PLEASE Standard rooms start at about £52pn, climbing to about £110pn for a suite.

Via Dei Martiri, 10-47826, Verucchio ostedelcastello.it

00 62

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Think Beirut and perhaps partying isn’t immediately what springs to mind. Bombs, bullets and barbed wire are the more universally recognised symbols of this city, where the presence of armoured tanks and soldiers bearing big guns hangs heavy even today. But in spite of its history of violence, Beirut puts great stock in having a good time. And there’s no shortage of trussed-up beautiful locals keen to be seen in Beirut’s bars and clubs. Don’t even think about going out in Beirut before 10pm – and even then, it had better be for dinner. Dancefloors are dead until around 1am. While there are a raft of upmarket clubs around town – such as Sky Bar, the ultra-glam venue affording a panoramic view of the Mediterranean coastline and boasting a filthy rich clientele of local celebs – we prefer the quirkier nightspots. Take Centrale (centralerestaurant. com), located at the end of a narrow, leafy passageway off Mar Maroun Street. There’s a restaurant on the ground floor, but we recommend

you step straight inside the industrial elevator that takes you to the bar. You’ll find yourself inside a large, industrial pipe, which has a retractable roof giving way to a view of old Beirut. The cocktails are also incredibly potent. Whatever you do, don’t miss B018 (b018.com), surely a contender for the world’s most inimitable club. Found underground in a car park a few kilometres east of Downtown, this mock-bomb shelter also has a retractable roof, which is peeled back at various points during the night to reveal Beirut’s starry night sky. It also gives the most hardcore clubbers a great view of the sunrise. (Don’t expect to get to bed before 7am.) Also make time to wander down Gouraud Street in Gemmayzeh, where there’s a cute indie cocktail bar every few paces. Dragonfly is a particularly cosy affair, and there’s an offbeat Waiting for Godot-themed bar with a teeny staircase that makes for a great photo opportunity. Expect free shots if you’re a lady. lebanon-tourism.gov.lb

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BELGRADE, SERBIA

We all know cities such as Bangkok and Rio de Janeiro guarantee a good party, but our tip for an emerging hotspot is the once-beleaguered Belgrade. The largest city in Serbia, it attracts visitors from nearby Croatia and Slovenia, who prefer its lively nightlife to their own. You can dance until dawn in most venues, and we’d especially recommend the clubs that open on barges lining the banks of the Danube over summer (pictured). serbia.travel

Photos: Thinkstock; AFP/Getty

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BUENOS AIRES, ARGENTINA

Anyone who’s been to Buenos Aires knows this conundrum: so many sights to see, but how to get out of bed after an epic night on the tiles? Bars don’t get going until past midnight, so be prepared for the dawn walk of shame. As well as the major clubs, the city’s slick mix of Europeanmeets-Latin-America means you can inject a little tango and salsa into your busy drinking schedule. Oh, and all of your fellow clubbers will be legcrossingly hot. turismo.gov.ar

TOP FIVE

NEW ORLEANS, US

The Big Easy might be best know as the birthplace of Louis Armstrong, but don’t expect this southern gem to be all lazy jazz lounges. The aptly named Bourbon Street is the main strip for getting the bevvies in – consume the ‘Hurricane’ cocktail at Pat O’ Brien’s with care. For something more unusual, try Rock ‘n’ Bowl (rocknbowl. com) on South Carrollton Avenue, where Cajun dancing meets bowling. neworleansonline.com

TEL AVIV, ISRAEL

Parties start to warm up around 2am in Tel Aviv, but you can start earlier at the seafront bars in the old city port. The scene in this city is suited to all tastes, from those predisposed towards energetically busting shapes, to more chilled-out types happy to sink drinks over a game of backgammon and a shisha. The vibe sways between sleazy, relaxed and everything in between, so check out a few places until you find your groove. Believe us, there are plenty of venues to explore.

NEXT WEEK For thrillseekers: the best rollercoaster holidays around

visit-tlv.com

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TRAVELTIPS

A trip to Mali, where you can see Dogon dancers like these, is considered too dangerous right now

READERS’ TIPS

YOU ASKED FOR IT... LAURA LINDSAY FROM LONELY PLANET

is the best way to get from Q What Morocco to Mali overland? Is there any public transport? We’d be more than happy to travel by chicken bus if there is one. Irina, via email journey that you have in mind isn’t A The possible at this time as the route is very

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visiting a friend in Madrid for Q I’m a few days next spring, and would like to stay on in Spain for about 10 days. With the exception of Barcelona, which I’ve already visited, where do you suggest I go? Susie, via email location, slap, bang in the middle A Madrid’s of the country, makes it a great place to start your exploration of the rest of Spain. My suggestion would be to head north and sample the delights of the Basque region. Begin in the wine region of La Rioja. Just over 300km from the capital, it feels worlds away from Madrid’s buzzing city life. To break up the journey, stop at Unesco world heritage site Burgos Cathedral for its stunning Gothic architecture. In La Rioja, the old quarter of Laguardia is worth a stroll around and the Bodegas Muga winery in Haro (bodegasmuga. com) is an essential stop for everything you ever wanted to know about wine in this region. Next, continue north to Bilbao for a spot of culture. Pay homage to the Museo Guggenheim and the less well known (but equally interesting) Museo de Bellas Artes. Finish up at the pièce de résistance, San Sebastian. With glorious beaches, stunning cuisine and incredible nightlife, it will be a great way to finish your holiday. While in San Sebastian don’t miss out on the delightful traditional snacks (pintxos) in the bars of the old town, Parte Vieja, and be sure to check out Playa de la Concha, one of Europe’s best city beaches.

MUST-DO MOUNTAINS TIP If staying in Marrakech, OF THE an Atlas Mountains trek WEEK is highly recommended. I went in March and saw four seasons in one day – we woke up to snow, then hit torrential rain, then the sun began to shine and we ended up swimming in mountain lakes. It was also absolutely mind blowing to see the village children who go to school on the cliffs. I must say the trek is not for the faint-hearted but it’s well worth it, even if your legs collapse beneath you! I hope everyone gets chance to experience the beauty of the Moroccan Atlas Mountains. Chelsea Vance, via email COFFEE WITH A VIEW When visiting Athens, head to the Gallery Cafe, sitting opposite the Ancient Agora (so ancient it first became a public area in the 6BC, and could date back to about 3000 BC) in the Greek capital’s oldest neighbourhood. The food is great, and if the weather is good, be sure to pick a table outside. It’s perfect for peoplewatching with a coffee. Sacha El-Haj, Essex

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dangerous, and it is also worth being aware that Mali itself has serious safety issues. There are two overland routes from Morocco to Mali; one involves travelling through Algeria and the other through Mauritania. The British Foreign and Commowealth Office (FCO) advises against travel over the Algerian border with Mali and throughout Mauritania, so neither route is a viable option. Added to this, travel to the northern provinces of Mali is currently advised against by the FCO. If you are determined to travel to Mali, you could consider flying out of Casablanca (the only Moroccan city with a direct flight to Mali) to Bamako. Bamako is in the small area of Mali that the FCO does not advise against all travel to. However, you should still be aware that there are safety concerns across the entire country. Register with the Foreign Office’s LOCATE service so that you are contactable in an emergency and continue to consult the FCO’s advice (fco.gov.uk). Also, check with your travel insurance provider that you will be covered before embarking on this trip. You might want to consider other overland routes within Africa or postponing your trip until it is safer.

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WHERE IN THE WORLD?

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A TRIP FOR TWO TO BATH & STONEHENGE

Been somewhere good lately? Send us a horizontal photo of yourself with a copy of TNT from anywhere around the world and, if we print it, you’ll win a trip for two to Bath and Stonehenge with Anderson Tours, valued at £104! » Email your pictures to ontheroad@ tntmagazine.com along with your name, where you’re from and where the photo was taken, or see tntmagazine.com/world. Files must be at least 500Kb.

SZÈCHENYI RAKPART, BUDAPEST Zdzislaw Bielski from Poland

BEST / WORST TRIP

THE TRAVELLER

JESSICA KEEFLER, 25

DAISY CARRINGTON, 31

Earlsfield, UK

New York, US

BEST I went to Mexico this year – it is the nicest place I have ever been. The beaches are perfect, the jungle is mind-blowing and the people are really friendly. I can’t wait to go back to Central America. And did I mention all the monkeys ...?! WORST A girly weekend in Barcelona a few years ago. We all fell out over loads of silly things and some of the group wouldn’t talk to each other in the end. But Barcelona itself was amazing!

Most memorable travel experience? Climbing Fansipan, Indochina’s highest peak, with a bunch of Vietnamese students. It was hard but felt like a major accomplishment. Scariest travel experience? I was driving to Acadia National Park in Maine with some friends. The car skidded out of control, stopping with our front wheels an inch from the edge of a very high, scary drop. Ideal travel partner? A local. They’ll know about all the fun stuff to do that’s not in the guide book.

» Tell us your best/worst trips, email laura.chubb@ tntmagazine.com

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SPLASHING OUT

TEQUILA SLAMMERS Sample the Tequila Library – comprising 100 different varieties – at the Rosewood Mayakoba resort in Mexico. A mile of exclusive Caribbean beach is included! Nightly rates start from about £336 (get four nights for the price of three from January 3 to April 30). Tequila tasting sessions at the resort start from £16. (00 800 87673966; rosewoodhotels.com).

THE INSIDER

BOB KINNAIRD, Principal, Glenmore Lodge Scottish National Outdoor Training Centre

My first ever big trip was a mountaineering expedition to the Stauning Alps in Greenland in 1974. I have never been to anywhere quite as remote since. My most challenging travel experience was a severe case of African tummy. I was working on Mount Kenya for a month and we decided to take a break and visit Malindi on the Indian Ocean coast. The first day snorkelling in the reefs was brilliant, but the rest of the week was spent between the toilet and my bed. I thought I was going to die ... My favourite place in the world is Jotunhiem Mountains in Norway, in the early spring. Cross-country skiing, excellent mountain huts and log fires is hard to beat. The next trip on my travel wishlist is the Corsican High Level Route, a trekking expedition along the backbone of Corsica. My guilty travel pleasure is my pillow. These days my body is far less tolerant of being uncomfortable. TNTMAGAZINE.COM

Mount Teide: Spain’s highest point

Isla Baja TENERIFE

SPAIN

MOROCCO Canary Islands Tenerife

Eerie: inside the island’s lava tubes GETTING THERE Fly from London via Madrid to Tenerife’s northern airport with Air Europa from £151 return (aireuropa.com). Direct flights from London to Tenerife’s southern airport with Monarch start at £105 return (monarch.co.uk).

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The other Tenerife Long regarded a beach-and-booze destination for sunburnt Brits, this Canary Island has a secret – a wealth of outdoor adventure WORDS ANNA MARIA ESPSÄTER

Tenerife has made a name for itself as the ultimate, yearround sun and sea destination, so of course I jump at the chance to pay the island a visit. Imagining lazy hours on the beaches of the ‘Island of Eternal Spring’, sipping cocktails and catching rays, little do I know I am about to experience one of the most action-packed trips of my life. The largest of the seven Canary Islands, Tenerife is best known as a haven for those seeking a beach holiday that boasts bars, clubs, and restaurants selling fish and chips to very pink-looking tourists. This is often all that many visitors see. But, as I soon discover, there is far more to this volcanic island than meets the eye. Or perhaps it just depends on where that eye is looking. Turned away from Tenerife’s resorts, it is easy to see what a naturally beautiful island this is, perfectly suited to outdoor adventure. Its rugged, volcanic landscape has been shaped by successive eruptions, producing beaches of black sand and a stunning mountainscape to boot. Its year-round warm climate is thanks to being on a latitude of the Sahara desert, and the trade winds that keep it from getting too hot (hence its ‘Eternal Spring’ moniker). From the airport, I am whisked off towards the unspoilt north-western corner, known as Isla Baja, where the towns of Buenavista del Norte and Garachico are surrounded by lush, green countryside. Here, I will spend a few days trying my hand (and arms, legs and feet) at everything from seakayaking to hiking and caving. But first, I am genuinely stunned by the tranquil town of Garachico, where you might even need a little Spanish to get by. If you ever wondered about a Canarian identity beyond the holiday homes and resorts, here is where to find it. Nearby La Orotava is a similar treat, a colonial town of picturesque plazas and cobbled streets. Bright-eyed and ready for action, I clamber out of bed on my first morning, heading off towards ‘La Cueva del Viento’, the Cave of the Wind. This recently opened cave system stretches 17km underneath the island, although, so far, less than one kilometre is open to visitors. It is the largest volcanic tunnel in the European Union, and is among the largest in the world. Making our way gingerly along the eerie, dark lava tubes – tunnels formed within lava flows – wearing helmets and headlights, the few hundred metres seems much further.

Finally, after an hour-long underground tour, including a few scary moments in the pitch black, we reach a sink hole called ‘the hole of the old woman’, a title inducing much sniggering (admit it, you’re smirking, too). Then, to my relief, it’s time to make our way back into the light again. Having started off exploring the very insides of the island, what could possibly beat that? As it happens, checking out

“

It’s known as ‘the hole of the old woman’

”

Tenerife from the sea is just as exhilarating, if a whole lot more strenuous. Equipped with a paddle, a partner and a kayak, I set off to admire the sheer drop of the Los Gigantes cliffs from below. These jagged rock formations at Punta de Teno plunge ››

Secret coves: Los Gigantes TNTMAGAZINE.COM

some 600 metres into the sea, and the surrounding coastline is dotted with caves, rocks and coves. Swimming in a natural cave is utterly magical, even if I do need the help of three people – two pulling, one pushing – to clumsily get myself out of the water and back into the boat for the return journey. After my unceremonious sprawl on the boat deck, I am determined to redeem myself during a hike up Mount Teide. Since this is the highest point in Spain and the third highest volcano in the world at 3718m (12,198ft), I cheat and catch the cable car up to 3555m (11,663ft) first. But it is still quite a climb in the thin air to the top. Forty minutes later, I stand at the top of Tenerife, surveying the island’s stunning lunar landscape stretching out for miles before me. It’s a satisfying feeling, and that sense of fulfillment is still with me as as I board my plane to leave with Tenerife thoroughly explored: inside, outside and topside. Those pink Brits don't know what they're missing! ❚ For more info see webtenerifeuk.co.uk For kayaking and walking adventures visit tenoactivo.com and elcardon.com For boats to Los Gigantes from Masca Gorge beach see mascalosgigantes.com

Coasting: kayaking Tenerife’s shoreline

NEXT WEEK We discover Estonia’s answer to Stoke Newington

MIDRANGE

LUXURY

For great traditional seafood in a rustic setting, stop at El Trasmallo near Garachico. This top-floor restaurant offers a seaview if you crane your neck, the staff is extra friendly, and the carafes of house wine are pretty decent too. (Carretera General Las Cruces, Garachico, tel. 922 830274)

El Burgado, right by the sea, serves up huge helpings of paella and jugs of sangria to go with the gorgeous views. Perfect for al fresco lunch on a sunny day. (Playa La Arena, Buenavista del Norte, tel. 922 127831)

For the ultimate (but most pricey) Canarian fare, the main hotel inside Mount Teide national park, Cañadas del Teide, has some of the best food the island can offer. The Flavours of the Canary Islands menu includes rabbit, local fish, heart-warming stews and much more. (parador.es)

DRINK

Nightlife in northern Tenerife is a world away from the hedonistic beaches and free-flowing beer down south, but there are still good bars to be found. In Garachico, several good drinking spots, such as Avenida Restaurante, line the seafront. Perfect for sundowners.

Canarian bars often serve food, not just drinks, and the Plaza de la Constitución Tapas Bar in La Orotava is a lovely place to sample both. Nearby patio bar Casa Lercaro is something of a Canarian beer hall, and is where people get in the mood to party. (Calle Colegio 5-7, La Orotava)

For a totally classy night out, try the Ábaco Mansion in La Orotava. This old governor’s mansion has a bar, restaurant, garden, and even a museum – if you fancy finding out about the history as well as enjoying the cocktail lounge, that is. (abacotenerife.com)

SLEEP

Hostel Tenerife is a friendly hostel housed inside a 100-yearold building in the historic town of La Orotava. It has two dorms and four private rooms, as well as a communal kitchen and internet access. The owner organises hiking and bike excursions and the beach is only 10 minutes away by car. (hostelbookers.com)

If splashing out a bit more, La Quinta Roja in Garachico is one of the most peaceful places to stay on the whole island. Painted a soothing terracotta colour, it faces a quiet square with an old church. Not for the party crowd, but it does have a bar with outdoor seating and a good restaurant. (quintaroja.com)

The latest in luxury, Vincci Selección Buenavista Golf & Spa Hotel opened last year and boasts suites with Jacuzzis, a fabulous spa and a gorgeous location. It might break the bank, but it’s worth it for a treat. Don’t get lost in the walk-in wardrobes. (vinccihoteles.com)

EAT

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Photos: Maria Espsäter, Thinkstock, TNT

BUDGET

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A royal welcome This is Oslo in 48 hours WORDS AZZAM ALKADHI

DAY 1: 09:00 Begin your trip with a delicious pastry or roll from Apent Bakeri (apentbakeri.no, Inkognito terrasse 1). Their homemade jam and massive cups of coffee will really kickstart your day. 10:00 Oslo’s city centre is relatively compact and easy to navigate, so finding the main sights is a fun and relaxing experience. Begin with the town hall, the Rådhus (Fridtjof Nansens plass). It was built in 1950 to commemorate the city’s 900th anniversary and was initially seen as an uninspiring and ugly cement block. It has since become an important landmark and statement of civic pride, with the annual Nobel Peace Prize being awarded here. Entry is free and you’ll be no doubt surprised by the difference between the interior and exterior. The entrance hall and interior rooms are adorned with striking and impressive frescoes and works of art by some of the country’s most famous artists, while the entrance hall houses a number of interesting wooden reliefs from Norse mythology. 10:30 A short walk away is the Nobel Peace Center (nobelpeacecenter.org), an interactive and technologically creative museum that highlights Norway’s role as an international peacemaker. Tickets cost 80kr (about £9). 12:00 Arguably Oslo’s most famous attraction, the Royal Palace (Drammensveien 1) is a huge and surprisingly open testament to the relaxed and friendly attitude of Norwegian monarchs. There are no railings or walls and its grounds also comprise the Slottsparken – a large and inviting public park. Make sure you don’t miss the changing of the guards that takes place at 1.30pm every day. 70

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14:00 With royalty on your mind, go and grab a coffee at Java Espresso Bar (Ullevålsveien 45B), a fantastically unassuming cafe frequented by several members of the Norwegian royal family. Chow down on a mouthwatering sandwich and maybe, just maybe, you’ll catch a glimpse of the king getting his caffeine fix. 15:00 The city’s numerous historic museums, art galleries and cultural centres will give you the daunting task of choosing which ones to visit on a short trip. An interesting starting point is the Norsk Folkemuseum (norskfolke. museum.no/en), in the museum district of Bygdøy, to the west of the city centre. It houses a unique open-air collection of buildings from the 17th and 18th centuries, ranging from barns and farmhouses to traditional dwellings. The Old Town section is a re-creation of an early 20th-century town, complete with a village shop. There are regular temporary exhibitions as well. Tickets cost 79kr (about £9). 16:30 The nearby Vikingskiphuset (khm.uio.no) is home to three viking ships from the 9th century that have been brilliantly preserved. For about £4 you’ll be transported to a different era and humbled by the intimidating hulls of the two largest ships, Oseberg and Gokstad. 19:30 By now, you’ve probably had your fill of museums and sightseeing for the day, so make your way to the trendy and vibrant district of Grünerløkka. The former industrial heartland of the city has acquired a buzzing energy that makes it popular with students and yuppies alike. Check out the bars before heading for dinner at Dattera Til Hagen (Grønland 10), which serves up an eclectic mix of tapas

Playwright Henrik Ibsen’s study at the Norsk Folkemuseum

Photos: Getty

dishes which you can wash down with a wide variety of beers. Later on, the top floor converts into one of Oslo’s hippest clubs. DAY 2: 09:00 The motto of Cafe Albertine (cafealbertine.no) states that “if you have no money, you must at least eat well” which certainly rings true at this unique restaurant-cum-cafe-cum-tavern. The interior is a sight in itself, while affordable Norwegian grub makes this cosy cottage a great place to fill up in the morning. 10:00 Hop on a ferry to Hovedøya, a small island about 10 minutes from the city. It has good walking paths, ruins of a 12th-century monastery and old artillery. 14:00 Enjoy lunch in comfortable surroundings at Colletts Cafe (Colletts gate 33), proud purveyor of “the best burgers in town”. They also serve great salads and soups. 16:00 For a bit of adventure, have a go at the ultimate toboggan run, Korketrekken (or corkscrew). The 2000m track was originally used as the bobsledding run at the 1952 Olympics. Catch the metro to the top of the run and rent a sled from next to the Frognerseteren restaurant. 20:00 Round off your weekend with a visit to the worldfamous jazz bar Blå (Brenneriveien 9C). As well as hosting internationally renowned artists, it provides a platform for up-and-coming contemporary jazz musicians. Fly direct from London Stansted to Oslo for as little as £28.50 return with Ryanair (2hrs 10mins) ryanair.com If you prefer a little luxury, British Airways flies direct to Oslo from Heathrow britishairways.com for around £140 return (2hrs 10mins)

The City Hall by night

The Nobel Peace Prize Laureate 2010 at the Nobel Peace Center TNTMAGAZINE.COM

Snow Sports EUROPE AND NORTH AMERICA

An early morning ‘board’ meeting 72

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Pound the powder ’Tis the season to get sporty. Here’s our pick of the slopes – for any skill level and every budget, from relaxing stays to boozy breaks WORDS LAURA CHUBB

Whether you’re a nervous novice, a confident intermediate or an all-out expert, we’ve searched out the top snowy spots for you to get sporty at this winter. Skint, modestly moneyed or flush? Doesn’t matter – we’ve found the best for every budget. So no excuses, winter hermits. Use our guide to pounding the powder, and there’ll be no getting fat on the sofa in front of DVD boxsets. See you on the slopes! SKILL LEVEL: BEGINNERS Budget Eastern Europe is great for snow bunnies on a budget. Borovets (bulgariaski.com) has pistes of varying length and difficulty, so if it turns out you’re a natural, you can get off the beginners’ runs (of which there are three) and take on more of a challenge. You can even try your hand at cross-country skiing on a track set 2km away from the resort. Borovets also boasts a thriving clubbing scene – try the promisingly named Bonkers. Ski passes start at £84 for three days. Midrange Once a budget resort to compete with the best of Eastern Europe, Grandvalira (grandvalira.com) in Andorra has become more mainstream in recent years, pushing the prices up a notch. Still, it’s much cheaper than the major resorts of France and Austria. There are 18 green runs – the ‘nursery’ slopes – and a whopping 38 blue runs, also with gentle gradients for beginners. There are lots of British-run ski schools, too. The village of Pas de la Casa has the liveliest après-ski scene, with some going so far as to call it ‘raucous’. Soldeu is a little more chilled – go to British-run Fat Albert’s for live music and big burgers. A six-day pass to the slopes is about £158. Even cheaper is La Clusaz (laclusaz.com) in France. At about £135 for a six-day pass, it boasts 23 green runs and 30 blue, ranking it among the best resorts in Europe for beginners. The quintessentially French mountain village is a delight, attracting a lot of return visits from skiers and boarders who fall head over heels for its traditional charm.

It also gets super-busy at weekends, which is great for a party (although makes for some crowded slopes). Luxury Crans-Montana (tourism-crans-montana.co.uk) in Switzerland is the perfect spot for novices looking for a touch of class to balance out any indignities on the slopes. Stretching across two towns with soul-enriching views across the Rhône Valley (well-known for its wine), there’s also a dearth of British tourists, which makes for a genuine escape from London life. (Though be warned – the Russian clientele is growing.) Train your snow legs on 17 different blue runs. While there is an upmarket feel to much of it – with designer shops, five-star hotels and even a Michelin-starred restaurant at your disposal – there’s also a good number of bars that keep revellers occupied into the early hours. A six-day ski pass will set you back about £182. SKILL LEVEL: CONFIDENT Budget It’s back to Bulgaria for what is arguably the ski capital of Eastern Europe. Bansko (bulgariaski.com) benefits from a long season (roughly December to May) and plenty of good powder. Together with 64km of pistes to explore, this cute medieval town has many cultural monuments and historic sites, while slightly further afield is the Pirin National Park – a Unesco World Heritage site home to epic limestone mountainscapes, glacial lakes, waterfalls and caves. There’s also a wealth of cheap accommodation options at Bansko and a decent clubbing scene. Set aside £125 for a six-day ski pass. Midrange For guaranteed great snow, try Tignes (tignes.co.uk) in France. At an altitude of 3500m, it is one of only two ski areas in the country – the other being upmarket Val d’Isere – listed as a ‘snow-sure resort’ in The Good Ski & Snowboarding Guide from Which? As well as having plenty of self-catering apartments, Tignes is rich in hotels ranging from two to four stars. If you get bored of plain old skiing ›› TNTMAGAZINE.COM

La Clusaz is good for beginners and snowboarding, Tignes also offers a programme of more offbeat winter sports, including dog-sledding, ice-diving and ski-joring (see our Best Of The Rest panel on P73 for more). Ski passes start at about £100 for three days – not the cheapest, but pair it with a two-star hotel and you’ll stay safely in the midrange bracket. Alternatively, Alpbach in western Austria (alpbachtal. at/en) offers unintimidating slopes suited to those who have graduated from the nursery runs but aren’t quite yet fearless. There is a large British presence here – the largest of any Austrian ski village – but it tends to be a laidback brand of Brit that makes it to Alpbach, owing to the subdued bar scene. A lift pass for six days costs about £138, depending on the season.

Not a beginner, presumably to the sheer spread of terrain (128 acres), and there’s no shortage of first-class food and drink. A ski pass costs £360 for six days. SKILL LEVEL: EXPERT Budget In the Tatra Mountains of southern Poland, Zakopane (zakopane.com) offers steep slopes that are definitely not for novices. Be adventurous and take to the snow in villages such as Bialka, Poronin and Bukowina Tatrzanska, which combine

Luxury With 13 trails set across 500 acres, Happo-one (snowjapan. com/e) is Japan’s number one ski resort. The views across the Japanese Northern Alps are breathtaking, the powder is deep and dry, and there isn’t the mad rush for tracks you might encounter in European resorts. The Hakuba valley – about 300km northwest of Tokyo – offers plenty of activities, including snow rafting, hot air ballooning, mountain biking and trekking. After a long day on the piste, be sure to head to your nearest onsen (hot spring) to relax those aching muscles. Lift passes, costing about £200 for six days, can also be used in Hakuba’s other seven ski and snowboard resorts. Aspen in Colorado is also a good choice for those fortunate enough not to be counting the pennies. At Snowmass Ski Resort (aspensnowmass.com), half of the 90 ski trails are suited to intermediates. Colorado’s secondlargest ski resort is also renowned for its crowd-free runs, owing 74

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Andorra is fast gaining a reputation

challenging terrain with the traveller’s satisfaction of straying from the beaten path. Big ski jumps can be found around the Krokiew area. Expect to pay about £11 for 10 rides on the ski lift (bargaintastic). Value for money accommodation abounds – though you get what you pay for.

BEST OF THE REST ALTERNATIVE WINTER SPORTS

Midrange For serious skiers looking for a quiet place to perfect their craft, you could do a lot worse than Cesana TorineseSansicario (comune.cesana.to.it) in Italy. Located in the Milky Way area – home to some of the best skiing and snowboarding ranges in Europe, and used for the Winter Olympics in 2006 – Sansicario and Cesana Torinese are the perfect alternatives to the region’s larger resorts. So quiet are they that you’ll often get the slopes to yourself. On the other side of the coin, there’s no nightlife and you might sometimes be obliged to share the snow with families. Still, you’ll be paying startlingly low prices compared to the majority of the Milky Way – about £155 for six days. St Anton (stantonamarlberg.com) in Austria provides a party after you’ve taken on challenging runs and off-piste areas, with the Moosewirt bar proving most popular with caners. There’s also great snowboarding for freestylers at Stanton Park. Lift tickets are about £188 for six days in high season, dropping by about £10 in low season. Luxury Drop some serious dollars at Whistler Blackcomb (whistlerblackcomb.com) in Canada – one of the word’s bestknown ski resorts after it hosted the 2010 Winter Olympics. You can ski and snowboard across two mountains, and the resort has committed to teaching classes of no more than four people, so you’ll receive close attention at the Snow School if you want to go from expert to certified legend. The resort has also just invested $2.5m (£1.5m) in new snow-grooming equipment, so the quality of the slopes will be top notch. A six-day lift pass is only £216 if you purchase in advance, and there are discounts before November 15. There are also several deals that include accommodation, with some studio rooms starting from as little as £55 per night – though, of course, there are plenty of top-end ›› rooms if you have the urge to keep on splurging.

Ice diving: for masochists We’ve hit the slopes on skis, bonked on our snowboard (in the boarder way, not the rude way) – hell, we’ve even regressed and gone sledding. So are there any winter sports left? You bet. Here’s just a few to get you started.

1 SKI JORING Think waterskiing but on snow. You can be pulled by horses, dogs, or even a snowmobile. Once you get somewhere approaching competent, you can work in jumps and obstacles. 2 SNOW KAYAKING Snow kayaking swaps rapids for slopes. Though it might strike you as a sort of glorified version of sledding, the crafts can get up to some serious speeds, so it’s best not to charge right down a mountain – start out with some gentle runs first. And wear your thermals. 3 BROOM BALL The challenge with broom ball – pretty much ice hockey, using a ball instead of a puck – is that you don’t get the luxury of wearing skates. Rather, you take to the ice in your trainers, and hit the ball with a plastic ‘broom’. We advise you pile on the protective pads, should you slip. 4 ICE DIVING For the incredibly brave, ice diving lets you scuba under thick sheets of ice. The diver is tethered to the ice to prevent anything going too horribly wrong – you really do not want to get stuck. Thick, pre-heated wetsuits keep out the cold and a full dive mask prevents direct contact with the freezing water. This is one of the more extreme adventure sports and you’ll need to undergo rigorous training. 5 DOG SLEDDING Not so much a sport as a particularly lazy way to travel, letting a pack of fluffy mutts pull you along the white stuff is a fun means to sightseeing. Also a great way to end a long, hard day getting beat up on the slopes.

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Another great Canadian snow spot is Banff in the Rockies, with an average nine metres of annual snowfall and advanced runs taking up about 25 per cent of all terrain. The place is packed with luxury resorts, and also offers five-star favourites such as the Fairmont if you need pampering after a tough day out in the cold. ❚ The Snow Express (snowexpress.co.uk) coach service from London Victoria takes you direct to the Alps for about £65, and the excellent Snow Carbon (snowcarbon.co.uk) eases your conscience and takes you by train all over Europe from £99, up to about £260.

BEST FROSTY GETAWAYS

Don’t forget to pick the right apres-ski scene. This looks a bit too posh to us!

Want to continue the chilly theme off-piste? Here’s our pick of the coolest hotels Photos: Marcus Gyger, Christian Perret, swiss-image.ch/Robert Boesch, Image Bank Sweden, XDachez, Andorra Tourism, Thinkstock

ICE HOTEL, ROMANIA Situated atop the Fagaras Mountains, these remote rooms are reached by a cable car climbing 2034m. Temperatures stay at a suitably icy -2°C. Animal skins and Arctic sleeping bags help stay the shivers. See: icehotelromania.com HOTEL DE GLACE, CANADA Just a few minutes from Downtown Quebec City, this hotel offers ice beds with pelts for protection. Rather cannily, a Nordic relaxation area with saunas and spas helps to warm things up. See: hoteldeglace-canada.com KAKSLAUTTANEN, FINLAND Stay in a snow igloo in Finnish Lapland, 250km north of the Arctic Circle. Wimps can escape to an igloo made of glass if they find it too chilly, or even a log cabin if they pussy out completely. You can also pass the time with a reindeer safari. See: kakslauttanen.fi ICE HOTEL, SWEDEN The original ice hotel is an opulent affair boasting icepillared hallways and ice-carved chandeliers. More than 80 rooms offer ice beds carved by artists and sculptors, in which you can snuggle up under a fragrant reindeer skin. See: icehotel.com

If you’re a beginner, choose the resort that’s right for you

NEXT WEEK

KIRKENES SNOW HOTEL, NORWAY Snow-laden rooms make a chilly change to this hotel’s cosy restaurant, where Arctic food – salmon, whitefish – is cooked over an open fire. See: kirkenessnowhotel.com

We take on Bolivia’s salt flats by motorbike. Vroom! Swiss luxury

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£430 £715 £720 £725 £1145 £1165 £1383 £1415 £1770 £1975

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TOURS, TREKS, SURFRING, XMAS & NY! Mount Toubkal Trek 4 days Surfing in Taghazoute 4 days Marrakech & Beyond 8 days Marrakech Sahara & Surf 11 days Camels, Souks & Kasbahs 15 days Christmas in Morocco 8 days Rock the Kasbah - New Years! 10 days

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EGYPT AND THE RED SEA Pharaohs adventure 6 days King Tutankhamen 9 days Egypt Unplugged 10 days King Ramses 13 days 5-star Jewel of the Nile 10 days

OFF THE BEATEN TRACK £299 £349 £399 £449 £779

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ANZAC 2012

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THE BEST XMAS & NEW YEAR TOURS EVER! We’re Triple-A bonded (ABTA, ATOL, AITO) and have over 10 years of experience in running top quality festive tours

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THE BEST GUIDES

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RUSSIA, MOROCCO, TURKEY £369 £429 £579 £799 £849

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egypt 9 day tour from only

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EGYPTIAN EXPRESS Ancient Egypt at its very best in 9 intoxicating days!

No Local Payments or Hidden Extras!

Egyptian Express fr £199

Pyramids & Beaches fr £359

ANZAC Day 2012 fr £239

Pyramids, Felucca, Luxor, Aswan - 9 days

Ancient Egypt + Dahab by the Red Sea -15 days

ANZAC & EGYPT combo tours - 4, 8, 12 & 17 days

XMAS/NY in Morocco fr £579

Hogmanay fr £239

XMAS & NY in Egypt! fr £299

Marrakech, Sahara, Surf - 8 to 11 days

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9 and 15 day tours in the sunshine of Egypt!

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w o h S l e v a r T Exclusive TNT

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CHRISTMAS & NEW YEAR TOUR TNT EXCLUSIVE - ONLY £499

BRUGES CHRISTMAS MARKETS

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NEW BUDGET TOURS EUROPEAN BLITZ ABSOLUTE EUROPE EUROPE EXPEDITION

10 DAY WAS £499

TNT £349

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BELGIUM & AUSTRIA

EUROPE EXPLORER

16 DAY WAS £1299

TNT £699 BARCELONA NOW INCLUDES VATICAN CITY, SPAIN FRANCE, MONACO, ITALY, NDS, GERMANY, BELGIUM SWITZERLAND, NETHERLA 22 DAY WAS £1499

BEST OF EUROPE

TNT £899

ULTIMATE EUROPE

TNT £999

FRANCE, THE SWISS 12 COUNTRIES… INCLUDING MPEII, 3 DAYS IN CORFU PO ALPS, ITALY, VATICAN CITY, , AMSTERDAM & MORE ICE (GREECE), CRUISE TO VEN 26 DAY WAS £1699 ES, ME TOUR… 14 COUNTRI YOUR ONCE IN A LIFETIRN EUROPE, ONE COACH, VISIT EAST AND WESTE INCLUDE AMSTERDAM, ONE CHANCE!! SIGHTS VIENNA, LJUBLJANA, ROME, PRAGUE, BRATISLAVA, A, FRENCH RIVIERA, POMPEII, TUSCANY, PIS SWISS ALPS, LUXEMBOURG MONACO, BARCELONA, & MANY MANY MORE!

TNT £799 15 DAY WAS £699

TNT £499

explore

TNT £499

E RLLAONDM DMAES CANLU IN W O N , ITALY, HO NY, GER D, ERL FRANCE, SWITZ

24 DAY WAS £999

LOW O BUDGET, HNIG ON QUALITYH

12 DAY WAS £799

N ER THA CHEAP COULD YOU NISE O RG A E L F YOURS

These prices are exclusive to TNT readers. Only ĂǀĂŝůĂďůĞ ƵŶƟů ƚŚŝƐ ^ĂƚƵƌĚĂǇ͕ ϮϮŶĚ KĐƚŽďĞƌ͘ Leave a ϭϬй ĚĞƉŽƐŝƚ ĂŶĚ ĚŽŶ͛ƚ ƉĂǇ ƚŚĞ ƌĞƐƚ ƵŶƟů Ϯϴ ĚĂǇƐ ƉƌŝŽƌ to departure!! Book now to reserve your place!

S R U O T L L % ON A 3* ACCO& 4* M.

? T O H R O Egypt tours

T DEPAORURS EV TING SATUERRY DAY

CHRIS TMAS CELEB DATES RA

TE EVE IN NEW YEARS CAIRO (EGYP TE

& B ES

XP T OF ELORER GYPT)

CAMFEREE L RIDE WIT HE EGYPT VERY BOOKTEOUR D

RED SEA RELAX RED SEA d ive

8 DAY WAS £299

TNT £159 8 DAY WAS £399

TNT £299

NILE ADVENTURE

NILE JEWEL

EGYPT EXPLORER

BEST OF EGYPT EGYPT EXPEDITION EXPERIENCE EGYPT

TURKEY

9 DAY WAS £336

TNT £199 9 DAY WAS £391

17 DAYS £899

TNT £299 10 DAY WAS £359

TNT £209

10 DAY WAS £449

TNT £339 15 DAY WAS £450

TNT £350 15 DAY WAS £499

TNT £399

WHERE EAST MEETS WEST

s 2012 anZac day toU Gur HWDLOV '$<6 6HH ZHEVLWH IR

SOUTH AFRICA

Magic Carpet FLying Carpet TurkISH DELIGHT

Town and the In 17 days, explore Cape le Mountain. Winelands, including Tab sburg, Discover Durban, Johanne e Nelson Se d. an lul Swaziland and Zu experience d an ce, Mandela’s birth pla Why not s. ari saf four days of wildlife rld’s highest wo ‘dare’ yourself to try the eat White Gr Bungi Jump, dive with the in the r tou sharks, or take a treetop Garden Route.

^ŽƵŶĚƐ ĞǆĐŝƟŶŐ͍ tĂŝƚ ƵŶƟů ǇŽƵ ŐĞƚ ƚŚĞƌĞ͊ 10 DAY WAS £659

TNT £499 15 DAY WAS £989

TNT £849 14 DAY WAS £449

TNT £399

Save up to HALF PRICE by booking this week! TNTMAGAZINE.COM 91 Go to www.expatexplore.com/TNT or ring us on 0207 394 5232 and quote ‘WINTER TNT’!

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! s y a D e r o m w Prices for 5

europe

TRIPLE AWARD WINNERS FESTIVE PARTY TREK 11 DAYS £659 (STUDENTS £629)

PARIS CHRISTMAS 4 DAYS £339 DEPARTS LONDON 24 DECEMBER

www.youtube.com/BusaboutTV FIND OUT MORE NEWS & VIEWS

www.facebook.com/BUSABOUTeurope

OPTION 2: Krakow to Prague (22 Dec)

Coach and ferry from London to Paris / 3 nights accommodation and 3 breakfasts / Christmas Dinner / Welcome dinner and drink / Bike tour and river cruise / Trip to Palace of Versailles with picnic lunch / Paris night tour by coach / FREE Lonely Planet guidebook

INCLUSIONS: Busabout Guide / Return

INCLUSIONS: All transport with Guide /

coach and ferry from London to Amsterdam / 3 nights accommodation, 3 breakfasts and 1 dinner / Amsterdam info pack / Orientation tour Amsterdam / Town and country bike tour / Canal cruise around Amsterdam / FREE Lonely Planet guidebook

10 nights accommodation and breakfasts / Tour of Auschwitz and Birkenau / Walking tour of Krakow / Christmas dinner / Christmas Eve dinner / A bottle of Champagne each / Vienna Schnapps museum / Busabout t-shirt / FREE Lonely Planet guidebook

MOROCCO

* Book by 30 Oct. Enter promocode ‘late’. Valid on 2011 depts only ONE-WAY EGYPT 7 & 10 DAYS FROM £484

Cairo, Pyramids of Giza, Valley of the Kings & Dahab

08450 267 514

IRELAND

SAVE UP TO £20

* Nov & Dec 2011 departures only. Book by 30 Oct. Enter procode ‘frosty’

CELTIC ROCKER 5 DAYS

£199 NOW £179 (STUDENTS £184 NOW £164) KILLARNEY, INIS MOR/CONNEMARA

MORE STOPS MORE STUFF MORE VALUE

FREE STUFF: Blarney Castle / Cliffs of Moher

SOUTHERN ROCKER 3 DAYS £119 NOW £109 (STUDENTS £109 NOW £99)

GALWAY & DINGLE FREE STUFF: Blarney Castle / Cliffs of Moher

OPTION 1: Prague to Krakow (22 Dec)

DEPARTS LONDON 30 DECEMBER

10% OFF*

WATCH OUR VLOGGERS

POLAND, SLOVAKIA, HUNGARY, AUSTRIA & CZECH REPUBLIC

INCLUSIONS: Busabout Guide / Return

EGYPT Groups of 4 - save 5% Groups of 10 - save 10%

DEPARTS 22 DECEMBER

NEW YEAR AMSTERDAM 4 DAYS £359

SAVE UP TO £48

MARRAKECH & SAHARA 8 & 15 DAYS FROM £574

Visit the Gorge to Dudes, Todra Gorge, go camel trekking and experience a Beber camp in the Sahara, ﬁnishing with a visit to Ait Benhaddou’s famous Kasbah and a tour of Marrakech.(Incl: accommodation)

WE ARE NOW RECRUITING FOR DRIVERS AND GUIDES FOR 2012 SEASON.

Check out www.busabout.com/recruitment

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CELTIC COMBO

ST PAT’S PARTY

DUBLIN 10 MARCH 2012

DUBLIN 15 MARCH 2012

The ultimate all-Ireland St Patrick’s extravaganza! See Ireland at its best North and South. INCLUSIONS:

For all who claim to be Irish and those who want to be! This neat package gives you the St Patrick’s Day party you’ve been waiting for. INCLUSIONS:

9 DAYS £539 PP*

> 8 nights accommodation and breakfasts > Exclusive Shamrocker St Patrick’s Day t-shirt > Exclusive Shamrocker St Patrick’s Day parties > Shamrocker Welcome pack > FREE entry to Cliffs of Moher > FREE entry to Blarney Castle > FREE Derry walking tour Groups of 4 - save 5% > FREE entry to Giant’s Causeway ps of 10 - save 10% > FREE entry to Carrick-a-Rede Rope Bridge Grou > FREE Belfast Black Cab tour > FREE entry to Guinness Storehouse > FREE Shamrocker walking tour of Dublin > FREE Lonely Planet guidebook

4 DAYS £199 PP*

> 3 nights accommodation and breakfasts > Exclusive Shamrocker St Patrick’s Day t-shirt > Exclusive Shamrocker St Patrick’s Day parties > Shamrocker Welcome pack > FREE entry to Guinness Storehouse > FREE Shamrocker walking tour of Dublin > FREE Lonely Planet guidebook

4 DAYS £269 PP* DUBLIN 15 MARCH 2012

INCLUSIONS: ALL THE GOOD STUFF OF 4 DAY ST PAT’S PARTY BUT WITH: > Return coach from London to Dublin

FREE LONELY PLANET GUIDE Save 10% when you buy two or more qualifying trips

SAVE UP TO ÂŁ20 * November & December 2011 departures only. Book by 30 Oct. Enter procode â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;frostyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;

HIGHLAND FLING

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5 DAYS

ÂŁ179 now ÂŁ159 (Students ÂŁ164

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Loch Ness, Isle of Skye & North West Highlands

SKYE HIGH

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ÂŁ109 now ÂŁ99 (Students ÂŁ99

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Isle of Skye, Loch Ness & Glencoe

HIGHLAND CHRISTMAS & HOGMANAY

THE LOONY DOOK Not many people choose to swim in the sea on New Yearâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Day in Scotland (itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a wee bit chilly) but for those mad enough to take the plunge, the appropriately named â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;Loony Dookâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; is a perfect hangover cure. Proudly sponsored by HAGGiS.

Our Legendary Festive trips! Experience a Scottish Christmas in a Royal Highland Hotel and Hogmany in Edinburgh. MEGA HIGHLAND CHRISTMAS

HOGMANAY & HIGHLANDS

ÂŁ415 Departs Edinburgh 24 December - 5 Day

ÂŁ385 Departs Edinburgh - 7 Day

INCLUSIONS: All accommodation and breakfasts / Packed

OPTION 1 â&#x20AC;&#x201C; 27 DECEMBER Highlands then Hogmanay

lunches on 25 and 26 December / Mulled wine on arrival to the Royal Highland Hotel / Christmas Eve party / Christmas dinner and wine / A traditional Scottish Ceilidh

OPTION 2 â&#x20AC;&#x201C; 29 DECEMBER Hogmanay then Highlands

ÂŁ335 Departs London 30 December - 4 Day

INCLUSIONS: : 2 nights hostel shared dorm on tour and

INCLUSIONS: Return coach travel from London /

4 nights hostel shared dorm Edinburgh / 3 day Skye High adventure / Hogmanay Street Party Pass / Torchlight Procession / The legendary HAGGiS Ceilidh Night

3 nights hostel shared dorm Edinburgh / Hogmanay Street Party Pass / The legendary HAGGiS Ceilidh Night / Edinburgh walking tour / HAGGiS sponsored Loony Dook

â&#x2C6;&#x17E; ROYAL HIGHLAND CHRISTMAS

ÂŁ415 Depart London 23 December - 5 Day INCLUSIONS: As per 5 Day Mega Highland Christmas but with return coach travel from London plus 2 nights in Edinburgh

â&#x2C6;&#x17E; ROYAL HIGHLAND CHRISTMAS

HAGGIS HOGMANAY

â&#x2C6;&#x17E; EDINBURGH HOGMANAY

ÂŁ335 Edinburgh 29 December - 5 Day INCLUSIONS: 4 nights hostel shared dorm / Hogmanay Street Party Pass / Torchlight Procession / The legendary HAGGiS Ceilidh Night / Edinburgh walking tour / Highland Day trip / HAGGiS sponsored Loony Dook

ÂŁ299 Depart Edinburgh 24 December - 3 Day INCLUSIONS: As per 5 Day Mega Highland Christmas

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ddd SNPRO\\X P\Z 5.44V@.QcR[ab_R` Award Winning 3,5,7 & 10 Day Adventures Â? Mini-Group Discounts Â? 4bN_N[aRRQ 1R]N_ab_R` Â? =_RSR__RQ Of @A. A_NcRY 3YVTUa 0R[a_R A_NcRY 0BA@ TNTMAGAZINE.COM Save 10% when you buy two or more qualifying trips

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ON 2011 PRICES

BALTIC EXPLORER CHRISTMAS

£659

to Festivals, until 31 Oct 2012. Does not apply n 1 - 31 October 2011. Valid for travel not apply to the food fund or sailing fund or Must book and pay in full betwee does * Offer valid for new bookings only. es or Gappies trips. Discounts apply to basic trip price only and standard brochure discount up to 15% off excluding t can be combined with one other to amend or withdraw this offer at any time. ANZAC, London short break packag to availability. Early Bird discoun right pre/post accommodation. Subject book with 10 mates and save 10% offers. Topdeck reserves the the the 6 month early payment and

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4 DAY PRAGUE NEW YEAR

20%

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£179

OFF! *

8 DAY

Dep. 20 Nov 2011

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NILE DISCOVERY

ESSENTIAL EGYPT

WAS £535

WAS £415

NOW

£450 £355

INCLUDES USD$210 LOCAL PAYMENT

INCLUDES USD$180 LOCAL PAYMENT

UK Golden Backpacker s

WINNER

Favourite Middle East Tour Operato r

trips for 18 to 30 somethings

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L8291 / Y2992

Flights not included. Egypt trip price includes local payment based on $1 = £0.635, which must be paid locally in USD. Exchange rates correct at time of printing, and subject to currency ﬂuctuations, depending when payment is made. Discount taken from the trip price and doesn’t include local payments.

www.topdeck.travel/deals

EUROHOTEL: Outstanding locations with bags of character

10 DAY DEMOCRACY ROAD

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16 DAY GONDOLAS GO NORTH Dep. 30 Oct 2011

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Includes Budapest, Prague, Vienna, Berlin, Amsterdam plus more!

Includes Venice, Croatia, Budapest, Prague, Vienna, Berlin, plus more!

WAS

14 DAY WINTER WONDER Dep. 16 Dec 2011

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WAS

£1220

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£1098

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EUROCLUB: Hostels to hotels, bungalows, castles & yachts

18 DAY WINTER GETAWAY

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FROM

EUROHOTEL: Outstanding locations with bags of character

£1350

£1080

NOW

£850

£680

NOW

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EUROHOTEL: Outstanding locations with bags of character

£1185

£1085

INCLUDES £195 FOOD FUND

FOR M O DEAL RE CHEC S KO OUR UT WEBS ITE

CALL US 0845 257 5210 Prices quoted & discounts are for speciﬁc departures only. All trips subject to availability. Discounts are off trip prices only, and do not include food funds, sailing funds and local payments. Flights not included. See website for full terms and conditions.

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tuhal 9 nn

EST! THE B D N A GEST E BIG H T , L A RIGIN THE O . . . T S s SKIFE christma

0m 18000m 5 - 3 igh H de! u Altit

1 1 0 2 S A e white t a XM im lt u the NE W YEAR’S NYE higher than Kosciusko!

XMAS & NYE COMBOS

NYE – COACH TOUR

■ SKIFEST XMAS + PARIS NYE

RISOUL, FRENCH ALPS

£769

(all-inclusive) 22 DEC-2 JAN ✔ 7 Nights Risoul ✔ 2 Nights Paris ✔ Coach London-Risoul-Paris-London

■ SKIFEST XMAS & HOGMANAY NYE

£689

22-29 DEC & 30 DEC-2 JAN ✔ 4 Nights Risoul ✔ 3 Nights Edinburgh ✔ 4 Days skiing & Hogmanay’s NYE celebrations!

@ Skifest Xmas Day

£619

■ 9DAYTOUR 30 DEC-7 JAN (all-inclusive) ✔ Depart London Friday evening ✔ 6 days skiing

NYE – FLIGHT TOUR ■ 8DAYTOUR 30 DEC-6 JAN ✔ 6 days skiing ✔ Book early!

£739

l! ies! Ris rtou

t Pa esin SkNifYE

(all-inclusive)

NYE – MAKE YOUR OWN WAY

£499

XMAS – FLIGHT TOURS RISOUL, FRENCH ALPS ■ 8DAYTOUR 23-30 / 24-31 DEC TIGNES, FRENCH ALPS

£739 (all-inclusive)

£699

(all-inclusive) ■ 8DAYTOUR 24-31 DEC ✔ World class 5 star ski resort ✔ Exclusive hotel tour ✔ Incredible value!

XMAS – COACH TOURS

■ 8DAYTOUR 31 DEC-7 JAN ✔ Self-drive or train/bus to Risoul

SKIFEST PRICE INCLUDES ✔ Return transport from London ✔ Optional b’fast & dinner daily in resort £80 ✔ Ski lift pass ✔ Ski/Snowboard hire ✔ Skifest merchandise ✔ Legendary Skifest parties & theme nights ✔ Amazing Xmas & NYE celebrations

Unbeatable skiing

RISOUL, FRENCH ALPS

£569

(all-inclusive) ■ 7DAYTOUR 23-29 DEC ✔ Depart London Friday evening ✔ Gets back Thurs 29 ✔ 4 days skiing

£619

(all-inclusive) ■ 9DAYTOUR 23-31 DEC ✔ Depart London Friday evening ✔ Gets back Sat 31 ✔ 6 days skiing

OUR SKI RESORT & ACCOM ✔ Self-contained apartments (sleeps 4-6) ✔ Balcony, kitchen, ensuite bathroom & WC ✔ High altitude resorts 1,850m-3,500m ✔ Top quality snow & over 300km of piste ✔ Ski runs literally at our door step ✔ Funky resort bars, shops & restaurants

Our apartments

Know before you go..... ✔ All Fanatics tours stay in self contained apartments ✔ We DO NOT use complexes designed for schools and youth groups ✔ We only use high altitude resorts with outstanding snow records

BOOK ONLINE NOW! COVENT GARDEN OFFICE 1st

www.thefanatics.com

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HORSE RIDING IN WALES RELAX AND RECHARGE YOUR BATTERIES AT THE WEEKEND

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Post your message at tntmagazine.com/seeking or email seeking@tntmagazine.com. Text TNT and your message to 81707* the rest of team clusters. Leea maeda. Churchill Castle crumbles: After three years, it’s time to go. Home to a vast number of inhabitants, our Castle has been our home away from home, witnessed varied drunken antics, housed many klepto mementos (WMG – how DID you get that plank in?) and coined countless new phrases. Thanks, Castle – family meals (DYI)/ Christmas/Halloween/80s at Eight

you I wouldn’t want to be normal now, anyway. Ms Freakazoid. Under pressure: Chezza, come on, you know I love ya. I swear I thought it was you – it was dark, I was drunk, she was up for it. You and your mum look really alike. Call me, please. Love Sad Steve. Stevie G: You mental bastard, you. I’m so excited you’ve finally made it to London. I can’t wait to put you through the initiation process – a Sunday worship session

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#449 Head to New York and take part in the Occupy Wall Street protests

sessions/late night “horror” movies will never be the same again. Love El Capitan and all Castilians Mo Better Cutz and saggy clot: I got a friend with a beard and another with a mo, and I’ve got enough face furniture for all the follically challenged in the nation. We are but men. Jeremy Frizz. Freako: From one weirdo to another, I’m lucky to have met you. I can’t even begin to imagine how awful life might have been if our paths hadn’t crossed. You make me feel normal, even though I’m not. And you know what? Having met

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Travel buddy wanted: My name is Shannon and I am a 19year-old female from New Zealand. In January 2012 I plan on travelling to Europe. I will be working as I go, so I’m looking for someone who also wants to stay in one place for a few months at a time. I mainly intend on going to London, Italy, Greek Islands and France, but will travel as much as possible. Is anyone in the same or similar situation as me and looking for someone to help ease the possible home sickness and loneliness that may occur? Shannon Anderson, via tntmagazine/forums Gig tickets: Has anyone got a pair of tickets for the Coldplay concert at the 02 in December, or The Cure concert at the Royal Albert Hall in November? Please contact me asap. Justin Cutcliffe, via tntmagazine/forums Ooh, lovers: To my amazing Aussie boy, after nine years together (three in Oz, six in London), I was thrilled to say the big “YES” in New York on Wednesday! Thanks for making my life more excellent. Your Pommie girl. Alex Hamilton. Managh: I wouldn’t have been able to do this without you. You’ve introduced me to an all new low in London. You’ve shared your bed, shuffled no matter where we are and spread the word of the herpes clusters. So here’s to this 22-year-old supermodel ... only in Cardiff. Let’s use your rack one last time to smuggle booze and let’s get mortaled. You’ll be epically missed. Mulan – naughty Asian minx and

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