The Sentinella Axarquia April 2011

The Axarquia Sentinella Edition No 80

www.thesentinella.com

April 11

Opticians Torrox Costa

For a list of April’s events see page 69 Tel: 952 96 79 23 Torre del Mar Tel: 952 52 83 95 Nerja See page 95

arkwrights the British store & more

95 25 19 780 www.arkwrights-groceries.com

The little mag that fits in your bag for ‘info on the go’

Rent a Home Spain Buy a Home Spain Algarrobo Pueblo

For Rent

Ref: R3 - 161 Spacious Penthouse:107 m² built & 50 m² terrace 3 beds, 1.5 baths, sea and mountain views, fully furnished, fully equipped kitchen, newly decorated

500€ per month Almayate

For Rent

Ref: R4 - 046 4 bed, 2 bath

Torre del Mar

Fully furnished, lovely gardens & pool, south facing, views to sea For Rent FANTASTIC PRICE 490€ per month Algarrobo

Townhouse, convenient location, unfurnished, communal pool and gardens. Private For Rent 550€ per month

garage, fireplace

Caleta de Velez

For Sale Ref: S3 - 111 3 bed, 3 bath Townhouse private terrace, garage, communal pool, tennis & gardens, near to school, quiet urbanisation, convenient for Caleta & Algarrobo. 5 mins walk from all amenities For Sale 199,950€

Torre del Mar

For Sale

Ref: S0 - 004/005 2 fully furnished

For Rent Ref: R3 - 157 3 bed, 2 bath Apartment.

For Sale or Rent R3 - 159 & S3 - 107 3 bed, 2 bath Villa on large plot, lovely living area, pool, various terraces, outdoor kitchen, pergola, A/C, heating, solar panel water heating

For Rent 600€ per month Torre del Mar

Ref: S3 – 112 Spacious 3 bed

Apartment, 88 m², garage, beautiful communal pool & gardens

For Sale 169,950€ Almayate

For Sale

Ref: S4 - 041 4 Bed, 3 Bath Townhouse, 180 m²

Closed terrace,

Terraces to front & back,

A/C,

large garage,

pool, sea views

For Sale

south facing balcony,

studios.

For sale: 59,950€ each

For Sale 325,000€

For Sale 209,950€

mountain views

www.rentahomespain.com / www.buyahomespain.com We have email: info@rentahomespain.com serious investors with Avda. Andalucia, 135, Torre del Mar money ready to buy Tel: 952 547 554 or 680 210 414 NOW!

Do you have a quality property to sell?

(You’ll find us just round the corner from the Thursday market at the roundabout)

To advertise call 664 210 468 or email sales@thesentinella.com

3

CONtaCt Us:

m Fro Ed... the

Editor: keidi - 610 976 284 Email: info@thesentinella.com

Passions! What are they and why are they important to have and include in our life? Well, passions are activities that we love to do, and the more we are able to integrate them into our life, not only will be far happier, but we’ll also live a life of purpose and meaning.

Recently I spent a Saturday morning attending a workshop in Lanjaron to identify my passions and integrate them into my life. The concept became increasingly popular following the release of the New York Times bestselling book, The Passion Test, by Janet Bray Attwood and Chris Attwood.

The purpose of The Passion Test is to discover your top five passions – the things that are most important to you in your life right now. It’s simple to take, fun to do and profoundly effective.

Plus, it’s a repeatable system you can use for the rest of your life to effortlessly follow your unique passions.

By taking it, you’ll learn how you can weave your passions into your life by focusing on them and getting crystal clear about what you really want. As we are all becoming increasingly aware of, what we focus on soon manifests as our reality, so this is definitely worth a go!

sales: kami - 664 210 468 Email:sales@thesentinella.com Distribution/Collections: tony - 664 689 138 Follow us on twitter @the_sentinella or @keidi_keating Email: sales@thesentinella.com www.thesentinella.com

Deposito Legal Ma-1435-2005 No part of this publication, including pictures may be copied, used or reproduced without our prior written consent.

The Sentinella accepts no responsibility for alterations to events listed, claims made by our advertisers or information provided by our contributors. So there!

The Sentinella is eternally dedicated to Colin Checkley, the founder and editor of The Sentinel Magazine.

May he rest in peace.

(Born; 1960 Died; 2004)

In the workshop, led by the inspiring Jessica McGregor Johnson and Beatrice Buchser, I discovered how to align my life with my passions to experience more joy and fulfilment on a daily basis.

www.thesentinella.com

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From The Ed (cont) If you’re wondering what the workshop con sists of, it’s a whole lot of fun, and at the same time, all the information will sink in as you ask questions, answer questions and prioritise the importance of what you want…or think you want…in your life!

Jessica and Beatrice also offer Passion Test coaching over three sessions. By taking part in this coaching you will: w Define your markers with extreme clarity and ensure that that become a strong focus in your life w Create an action plan to begin to move in the direction of all of your passions w Look at how to overcome any false ideas, beliefs or concepts that are stopping you ‘going for’ your passions. You’ll learn a powerful yet simple process that you can use at any time to question any thought that is stopping you from achieving your highest goal.

The cost for the three sessions is £420.00. Or why not attend the next workshop coming up in London on 7th May? For more information call Jessica on 650 716 229.

And let’s all lead a life of greater passion!

Keidi Keating

Editor (of the original little mag)!

A Taste Of What´s On This Month Papparazzi....................................Page 40 amazing animals.........................Page 56 Film review..................................Page 84 share’o’scope............................Page 103 whats On....................................Page 110 information.................................Page 112 Jokes...........................................Page 114 Puzzle Pages..............................Page 116 star signs...................................Page 118

Strange News Giant Shoe Car A footwear manufacturer in China has made an electric car out of a giant shoe.

It can carry two people up to 250 miles at speeds of up to 20mph on a single charge of the battery underneath the driver's seat.

A Kang Shoe company spokesman said it took six months to design and build the car at a cost of around £4,000.

Company president Wang Zhengtao says it is designed as a promotional tool and he plans to make 40 for stores around the country.

The Attraction of a Magnet Man A human magnet has become a massive attraction in his Serbian homeland since he discovered that he's irresistible to metal.

Miroslav Mandic, 67, who lives with his wife in Simanovci, has baffled medics by being able to stick coins, cutlery and any metal object all over his body.

The real life Magneto said: "It started when I was a young man and I was trying to pay for a newspaper and the change just wouldn't leave my hand.

"Over the years it has got stronger and it can be quite a nuisance now except of course people never seem to get tired of me walking around with keys or phones or even an iron stuck to me.”

Menu del Dia - 6.50€

Monday - Friday 12pm - 4pm 3 courses (including vegetarian)

Help yourself Buffet - Sundays Adults - 9€ Children under 10 - 5€ 13.00 - 16.00

Includes various starters, mains, vegetarian dishes, rice and bread (also available on Thursdays from June)

Special Menu Monday to Saturday - 8.95€

Pappadam, Onion Bhajee / Vegetable Pakora / Vegetable Samosa, Prawn Puri & Chicken Tikka Chicken, Lamb, Prawn Vegetable - Vindaloo / Balti / Jalfrezi Tikka Masala / Korma / Dansak / Biryani / Chicken or Lamb Tikka Pilau Rice / Naan / Tea or Coffee

Avda Andalucia, Bloque Jupiter, Pasaje Timon 2, Calle Timon, Torre del Mar

Tel: 952 547 798 or 665 675 053 Open: 12.00 - 16.00 18.00 - 24.00 everyday www.publisur.net

Sunday Roast inc.glass of wine â‚Ź 8.50 Bookings recommended

All Day English Breakfasts, Full Menu Open from 10am till late every day Scandanavian Special every Tuesday Karaoke every Saturday night

Quiz Night every Thursday from 8:30pm with cash prizes APARIV Charity Quiz last Friday of every month

C/Dr Maranon, Torre del Mar Tel: 952 544 362

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Commentators Gaffes

12 of the finest (unintentional) double-entendres ever aired on British TV and radio

1. Ted Walsh - Horse Racing Commentator 'This is really a lovely horse. I once rode her mother.'

2. New Zealand Rugby Commentator - 'Andrew Mehrtens loves it when Daryl Gibson comes inside of him.'

3. Pat Glenn, weightlifting commentator - 'And this is Gregoriava from Bulgaria.

I saw her snatch this morning and it was amazing!'

6. Carenza Lewis about finding food in the Middle Ages on 'Time Team Live' said: 'You'd eat beaver if you could get it.'

7. A female news anchor who, the day after it was supposed to have snowed and didn't, turned to the weatherman and asked, 'So Bob, where's that eight inches you promised me last night?' Not only did HE have to leave the set, but half the crew did too, because they were laughing so hard!

8. Steve Ryder covering the US Masters: 'Ballesteros felt much better today after a 69 yesterday.'

4. Harry Carpenter at the OxfordCambridge boat race 1977 - 'Ah, isn't that nice.. The wife of the Cambridge President is kissing the Cox of the Oxford crew..'

5. US PGA Commentator - 'One of the reasons Arnie (Arnold Palmer) is playing so well is that, before each tee shot, his wife takes out his balls and kisses them..... Oh my god !! What have I just said??'

9. Clair Frisby talking about a jumbo hot dog on Look North said: 'There's nothing like a big hot sausage inside you on a cold night like this.'

10. Mike Hallett discussing missed snooker shots on Sky Sports: 'Stephen Hendry jumps on Steve Davis's misses every chance he gets.'

E - CIGS Electronic cigarettes

Switch to a healthier way of smoking any time, any place, anywhere. Less than half the price of normal cigarettes Suppliers of electronic cigarettes, cartridges & accessories Try before you buy Find us at the Country Farmers Market at Trapiche & markets at Puente don Manuel, Mollina & Hipodromo Mijas Costa Start up kits 36.95â‚Ź which includes any opening offer of the equivalent of 80 cigarettes free Ring: 626 458 954 ask for Mandy or visit our website

www.thesmokingplace.com For online orders please quote LM Spain for the best discounts

TAJ MAHAL Traditional Indian Tandoori Restaurant Torrox Costa Eat as MUCh as yOU LikE

Y L N O

9.95 €

We offer an´all you can eat’ menu (as many starters, main courses & desserts as you want)

all freshly cooked to order.

You stay seated at your table as everything is served to you in courses.

Open every day - 12.00 - 16.00 / 18.00 - 24.00 Ctra Nacional - 340 (Next to Post Office) torrox Costa

tel: 95 253 4972 / 634 051 535

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Email Tracker Programmes The man that sent this information is a computer tech. He spends a lot of time clearing the junk off computers for people and listens to complaints about speed.

1) Any time you see an email that says "forward this on to '10' (or however many) of your friends", "sign this petition", or "you'll get bad luck" or "you'll get good luck" or "you'll see something funny on your screen after you send it" or whatever - it almost always has an email tracker program attached that tracks the cookies and emails of those folks you forward to.

The host sender is getting a copy each time it gets forwarded and then is able to get lists of 'active' email addresses to use in SPAM emails or sell to other spammers. Even when you get emails that demand you send the email on if you're not ashamed of God/Jesus - that is email tracking, and they are playing on our conscience. These people don't care how they get your email addresses - just as long as they get them. Also, emails that talk about a missing child or a child with an incurable disease "how would you feel if that was your child" - email tracking. Ignore them and don't participate!

2) Almost all emails that ask you to add your

name and forward on to others are similar to that mass letter years ago that asked people to send business cards to the little kid in Florida who wanted to break the Guinness Book of Records for the most cards. All it was, and all any of this type of email is, is a way to get names and 'cookie' tracking information for telemarketers and spammers - to validate active email accounts for their own profitable purposes.

You can do your Friends and Family members a GREAT favour by giiving this information to them. You will be providing a service to your friends. And you will be rewarded by not getting thousands of spam emails in the future!

Do yourself a favour and STOP adding your name(s) to those types of listing regardless how inviting they might sound! Or make you feel guilty if you don't! It's all about getting email addresses and nothing more. You may think you are supporting a GREAT cause, but you are NOT! Instead, you will be getting tons of junk mail later and very possibly a virus attached! Plus, we are helping the spammers get rich! Let's not make it easy for them!

RESTAURANTE ASIATICO

FENG

Lidl Fengs Avda. Andalucia To Nerja

Open every day

12.00 - 16.30 18.30 - 24.00 Avda. Andalucia, 35 Bajo 29750 Algarrobo-Costa (Malaga)

Tel: 952 551 439 or 671 886 552

VENta BaJa SPECIAL MENU

9.50€ special menu

Monday - Thursday Day & Night (except Monday lunch) Poppadam & Pickles Selection of starters: vegetable samosa or pakora or onion bhaji or Prawn puri or Chicken tikka Main course: chicken, lamb, prawn or vegatable: Korma, Madras, Vindaloo, Balti, Jalfrezy, Rogan Josh, Tikka Masala, Karahi, Biriyani or Chicken or Lamb Tikka Accompaniments: Plain or Pilau rice. Plain, Garlic, Cheese or Onion Nan Bread or Chapati Ali & his staff promise to continue serving their cuisine to it’s usual high standard, using only fresh ingredients that are freshly cooked to order, ensuring the Taj Mahal (Puente) is the BEST Curry House in Andalucía FrEE Pappadam with Mango Chutney & Pickle tray with all meals

Menu del Dia Mon-Fri 12pm - 4pm 3 courses €5.95 with veg. curry €6.95 with meat/prawn curry

takeaways available Free Pappadam & pickle with takeaways

Opening hours 12pm - 4pm and 6pm - 12am every day (closed Monday lunch) Puente don Manuel (Chiringuito antonio) tel: 952 510 886 Mob: 667 934 731

Casa Blanca roast Chickens & hamburgers Venta Baja

w w w w w w w

Varied menu Various tapas Eat in or take away sheltered terrace great atmosphere great service great prices We are here

Cruce de Periana

Car Park

To Puente don Manuel

Te l e p h o n e : 6 5 4 2 2 3 2 0 2

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De Cotta How do you choose a lawyer in Spain?

Choosing your legal representative in Spain can be complex. You want some one that speaks your language and understands your culture but also you need some one who can work effectively in the Spanish legal framework. To help you make your choice, consider these questions: Q. Does your lawyer speak your language?

Do they understand the differences in the Uk and spanish legal systems? The best choice is a firm where there are English and Spanish lawyers working together. Also, ask for evidence of UK training if a Spanish lawyer says they are a solicitor.

Q. has the firm been established for a long time? are they a respected and credible law firm? There are new firms springing up all the time, but very few can boast a history dating back over a quarter of a century. Look for an established firm, which is well respected by the community, the judiciary and the tax authorities.

Q. Does the law firm have specialists? Law is a highly complex field; for example Wills and Probate is very different to Family Law or Property Law. Make sure you have an expert looking after you.

De Cotta, McKenna & Santafé stands out in southern Spain as one of the most experienced law firms. Established over 25 years ago, their services include: Property, Planning & Conveyancing; Wills, Probate & Tax; Family & Divorce; Personal Injury; Commercial, Timeshare & Fractionals; as well as Civil & Criminal Litigation.

Friendly English and spanish team The friendly and experienced team in Nerja are available for private consultations. The team is headed by Sandra Wrightson, one of Spain’s acknowledged specialists in Family Law, Timeshare and International Law. Fellow partner, Jon Sutton is also available for expert counsel on Wills, Probate and Personal Injury.

Reyes Gomez Llorente and Francisco Martin are amongst the firm’s highly skilled Spanish abogados in Nerja, assuring all De Cotta clients the most expert service in all areas of Spanish law, especially urban and rural property; Timeshare, Divorce as well as international law.

5 Regional Offices - De Cotta Law has offices in Nerja, Granada, Coín, Mijas-Costa and Tenerife offer one of the best legal networks, staffed by highly experienced English lawyers and Spanish abogados. international scope - In addition, the firm’s expertise is international, working closely with their UK and global network of associates, clients are assured seamless service on all issues such as Wills & Probate; Family Law, including divorce and child abduction; Property, including Timeshare and buying and selling permanent and holiday homes.

Multi-lingual - The team is multi-lingual and in Nerja alone boasts some of the coast’s most experiences lawyers speaking English, Spanish, Danish, Dutch and Italian.

Private Consultations To find out about the firm’s ‘Open House’ on April 27th, where over free refreshments, snacks and, in the afternoon, cheese and wine you can meet the team, and have a free consultation simply email: nerjaenquiries@decottalaw.net or call 952 527 014.

E r o s k i h a i r s a lo n s P E J o s h a s c lo s E d d o w n

Angela has gone into partnership with Marilo, another hairdresser and Gloria a beautician.

Based in Velez-Malaga.

To make an appointment please call:

615 266 712

‘Marich’

Academia de Idiomas Language School ENGLISH FRENCH GERMAN

Legal Services SPANISH

TRANSLATION SERVICES

Join now, classes have started!

Located in Puente Don Manuel at the Periana Crossing Please contact and ask for more info: Maria Azucena CHACIN Tel.: 633 780 687 Email: idiomasmarich@gmail.com

www.academiamarich.com

English Legal Advisor & Experienced Lawyer Specialising In:

PProperty Legalisations PCatastro & Border Corrections PAddition of Swimming Pools or Extensions to your Title Deed

PProperties without Deeds PSale /Purchase Conveyancing PInheritance Process & Wills

A Quick, Professional & Impartial Service Estimates Given Call for a FREE consultation & get your property papers checked out. Don´t lose a sale due to paperwork inconsistencies

Solutions 4 U, Cómpeta Office Tel: 952 55 38 07 or 660 51 01 34 Email: info@solutions4u-competa.com

Paul Atkins Motors RENAULT SCENIC Diesel Spanish 1999 Lovely condition POA

MITSUBISHI PAJERO 2.8 TD 7 Seater Spanish ITV FORD MUSTANG CONVERTIBLE LHD Spanish plates Lovely condition POA HONDA HRV 5 door 2001 Spanish plates Nice car POA

RENAULT SCENIC 2004 1.9 Diesel RHD English Good condition POA

GREAT KIT CAR Please call for more information POA

RANGE ROVER 4.6 HSE 1998 Spanish plates Leather etc POA

SSANGYONG MUSSO 2000 Petrol Spanish plates RHD POA

MITSUBISHI PAJERO 2.5 Diesel 7 Seater English Leather TO CLEAR 700€

FOrD FOCUs 2004 5dr 1.6 Petrol Spanish JEEP ChErOkEE Spanish NissaN PriMEra 1.8L Petrol English MOrE COMiNg iN!!

tOyOta 7 sEatEr tO hirE Over 30’s only - Fully insured

ROLLS ROYCE

Wedding Hire Service Special Occasions Call: 663 515 341 or 655 251 207

Valeting

Wash, leather & vac - from 6€ Wash, leather, vac, dash clean, tyre & bumper black - from 12€ Full Valet - from 22€ ALSO…..

Tailored valets, Dust removal, Dog hair removal, Polishing, Stain removal, Wheel trim re-painting, Chrome polishing & much more...

For more information call: 663 515 341 or 655 251 207

MeCHAniCAL

TyReS

WeLDinG

FROM CLASSiCS TO MODeRn DAy CARS

Paul Atkin

WILL BUY ENGLISH CARS

EMERGENCY CALL OUT SERVICE

Car Mechanic, Body Repairs & Tyres

Large Premises

Unwanted Vehicles removed

SERVICES!!

we will act as your agent & sell your vehicle

Dents, Scratches, Welding, ITV Failures, Servicing, Insurance, Crash Repairs, Grúa Services, Secure Parking

TYRES! TYRES! TYRES! “The Spanish Government have issued new directives to the Guardia Civil to clamp down on poor/bald tyres”

Don’t get caught out!!

We have just taken stock of 200 Top Quality Nearly New Tyres ranging in sizes 13” - 18” and prices starting at an incredible 20€ 663 515 341 / 655 251 207

To Vinuela

We are here A-402

Garden Centre To Vinuela To Puente don Manuel

To Periana

Email:casa-atkin@hotmail.com Directions: Take the Vinuela turning off the A-402, at the Garden Centre turn right and we are at the end of the road “Look for the Mannequin”

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Linea Directa with LÍNEa DirECta, thE BEst traVEL assistaNCE FOr EXPats Línea Directa, market leader in the direct sale of car, motorbike and home insurance, is offering its customers Travel Assistance, which covers road incidents occuring in Spain, the rest of Europe and all countries included in the Green Card.

Línea Directa’s Travel Insurance covers not only the vehicle, but more importantly the occupants, offering its Expat customers a fast, quality service.

As for the vehicle service, these are just some of the benefits which Expat customers can now enjoy: • From the point of departure: the customer receives assistance wherever the vehicle breaks down.

• If the vehicle breaks down and only requires a quick repair (taking no more than half an hour), Línea Directa will repair the vehicle on the spot, so that customers can continue their journey.

• If the customer runs out of petrol, Línea Directa takes the vehicle to the nearest petrol station.

• If the customer gets a puncture on route, Línea Directa will help to change the wheel.

Travel assistance is a service offered by Línea Directa without timetable restrictions: 24 hours a day 365 days a year and it is one of the services for which Línea Directa receives most praise from its Expat customers due to the fact that it offers safety, trust and peace of mind when it is most required.

Further information on this service in future editorials.

If you wish to find out more, call 902 325 325 now.

Physiotherapy on the Costa UK qualified and chartered.

Spanish Registered Physiotherapist, Col No. 2066

Sanne H. Mortensen Neck and low back pain, soft tissue lesions, sports injuries, post-operative rehabilitation, respiratory conditions, muscle imbalance, joint and muscle pains.

Electrotherapy, manual therapy, joint and soft tissue mobilisations, exercise therapy, kinesio-taping, postural corrections, etc.

El Morche/Torrox area

626 152 756

B uilding S ervices and P lumbing From a tap washer to heating, home renovations and extensions Our team of 3 are fully qualified and have many years experience.

All areas considered For a no obligation quote, please call:

650 003 029

Mobile Tyre Fitting Service

Service with oil & filter from

45â‚Ź inc. IVA

Free Brake Check Air-con re-charge Guaranteed best prices on the coast for all makes of tyres

41â‚Ź inc. IVA

Pro Neumaticos

FOr saLE La Viñuela

A lovely 3 bedroom villa with breathtaking views overlooking the lake 2 bath, one en-suite, log burning fire, air con in lounge. Fully enclosed property with drive for 2 cars. 8m x 4m pool, sat tv & internet access.

Fully fitted kitchen inc. white goods, close to all local amenities & 15 minutes to the beach

249,000€

Call: 691 301 425

Winter is here!

Will you be using your Terrace / Balcony this winter?

You could still be using it through the wind and rain The answer

Glass Curtains!

Spring Madness! First 6 orders - up to 50% off!

Glass Balustrade

Pool fencing

Product Benefits: w w w w w w w w

Mr. & Mrs. Goddard, Arenas

Doesn’t spoil views Folds neatly away Elimates dust and dirt No need to bring furniture inside Warmer winter homes Increases value to property Adds security Reduces noise

Other Products

Replacement Windows/Doors ---Glass cut to size ---Shower screens ---Repairs to all Glass Products ---Conservatories ---Solar Film Call Glass Curtains Direct on:

Office - 952 931 464 Mobile - 626 458 954 Email: glasscurtainsdirect@gmail.com www.firstglasscurtains.net

Winter Opening Hours: 19.00 - 22.30 Sunday Lunch & Bank Holidays: 13.30 - 15.30 Tuesdays Closed Summer Opening hours: Open Every Night 19.30 - 23.30 (summer hours from June) CHEZ SPICE: Road to Los Romanes, La Carpa

Call: 650 887 100

“OSTEOPATHY for the whole family”

Clementine Duplan

OstEOPath Bsc (hons) Ost (Uk qualified)

structural, visceral and cranial osteopathy, children and pregnancy

“Gentle and specific approach” Member of the General Osteopathic Council (English register) and the Spanish Osteopathic register

torre del Mar, torrox & Malaga areas

622 078 432

Email: clem.dupl@hotmail.fr

Pasta... e Basta ITALIAN RESTAURANT

Authentic Italian Cuisine Family Friendly Specialising in Pasta & Meats Fancy something different?

Just call beforehand & we’ll do what we can!

Private Functions Catered for Call Franco or Yveta 952 54 24 10

Lunch 1pm - 3.30pm Evening 7pm - Close FREE glass of cava for everyone Closed Tuesdays in your party with Plaza Mar, Avda. de Andalucia 63, Torre del Mar this coupon

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Man - Could He Cope?

Great idea for a TV show!!!

Six married men will be dropped on an island with one car and 3 kids each for six weeks.

Each kid will play two sports and take either music or dance classes. There is no fast food.

Each man must take care of his 3 kids; keep his assigned house clean, correct all homework, complete science projects, cook, do laundry, and pay a list of 'pretend' bills with not enough money. In addition, each man will have to budget enough money for groceries each week.

Each man must remember the birthdays of all their friends and relatives, and send cards out on time - no emailing. Each man must also take each child to a doctor's appointment, a dentist appointment and a haircut appointment. He must make one unscheduled and inconvenient visit per child to the Emergency Room. He must also make cookies or cupcakes for a school function. Each man will be responsible for decorating his own assigned house, planting flowers outside, and keeping it presentable at all times.

The men will only have access to television when the kids are asleep and all chores are done. The men must shave their legs, wear makeup daily, adorn themselves with jewellery, wear uncomfortable yet stylish shoes, keep fingernails polished, and eyebrows groomed.

During one of the six weeks, the men will have to endure severe abdominal cramps, backaches, headaches,have extreme, unexplained mood swings but never once complain or slow down from other duties. They must attend weekly school meetings and church, and find time at least once to spend the afternoon at the park or a similar setting.

They will need to read a book to the kids each night and in the morning, feed them, dress them, brush their teeth and comb their hair by 7:30 am. A test will be given at the end of the

six weeks, and each father will be required to know all of the following information: each child's birthday, height, weight, shoe size, clothes size, doctor's name, the child's weight at birth, length, time of birth, and length of labour, each child's favourite colour, middle name, favourite snack, favourite song, favourite drink, favourite toy, biggest fear, and what they want to be when they grow up.

The kids vote them off the island based on performance. The last man wins only if...he still has enough energy to be intimate with his spouse at a moment's notice.

If the last man does win,he can play the game over and over and over again for the next 18-25 years‌ eventually earning the right to be called Mother!

Grand opening Royal Marrakesch on Saturday 30th April, 2011 at 8pm Buffet and drinks included 77â‚Ź Please book (70â‚Ź with prior reservation) From 5.30pm - 7pm we have a free Open Day for those interested

Oriental Club

for relaxation and enjoyment of life Leave everyday life behind and immerse yourself in the sensual world of the Orient.

Enjoy the unique atmosphere, and breathe through our wellness program, or book a swingers evening to your taste

km 274

Bar, restaurant, dancing, wellness and Swinger events For information & reservations call Angelina on: 633 740 519 or join on our website: www.royalmarrakesch.com or email: royalmarrakesch@gmail.com

TORROX Traditional Indian Restaurant

All you can eat 9.95â‚Ź

Laguna Beach, Torrox Costa Tel: 951 239 670 Mob: 677 334 721 Opening Hours Tuesday - Sunday 1pm-4pm & 6pm-midnight Closed Mondays

The Best Clim

t Monday Marke

X COSTA

mate In Europe

Lighthouse

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a t s o C x 39 o r r 8 o 2 TSee pages

re! Come and discover the new arts and crafts shop in Torrox Costa. Or.y.gen is just off the Paseo Maritimo Costa del Oro, Blq. 7 behind e r a ost C the Bhuda restaurant. It has handmade jewx o r Tor ellery, hand-painted ceramic tiles (and these For reputable buildings and contents insurcan be made to order for terraces, kitchens, ance, car insurance, private medical insurance, swimming pools etc..), paintings, hand-painted pets insurance, funeral plans and more, conhandbags, clothing and hats, gifts and more. tact Lewis insurance services.

Everything is unique.

Lads & Dads Barber shop with 20 yrs experience. Whether you prefer mobile or an appointment, both are catered for – or just pop in. t it he abou ad all

TAJ MAHAL

Traditional Indian Tandoori Restaurant Torrox Costa EAT AS MUCH AS YOU LIKE

9.95â‚Ź Open 12.00 - 16.00 / 18.00 - 24.00

Ctra Nacional - 340 (Next to Post Office)

tel: 95 253 4972 / 634 051 535

CardioDance:

Learn to Salsa, Cha Cha, Swing, Hustle.

Dance Classes: Also includeS Rumba, Sal Cha and Choreographed Routines Keep Fit Classes with or wITHoUT weights.

Y our Heart, Your Life, Your Choice.

Almeria TO Estepona Call HuGh GRANT 606 086300

hughgrant@tiscali.co.uk

wellness Vital has a special offer for April: a Hyaluronic facial treatment for only 39€. Call for an appointment: 644 58 99 83. rebeccah Curtis wellbeing Centre is offering an Indian head massage for only 18€ during April. Originating from India, the head massage is such a popular treatment for stress relief that corporate companies recognise its benefits & even introduce it into their business for their employees. It is a massage of your upper back, neck, shoulders, scalp & face.

Also at the wellbeing centre we have VibraTrim & Toning table to help improve your well being, health & fitness.

Caribe. All you can eat 3-course buffet with

homemade desserts - 12€ between 1.304.30pm. Nerja players present cabaret at the Caribe on Easter Sunday with champagne buffet. Tickets available now (receive a complimentary drink when you purchase your ticket!), Come and watch the Royal Wedding on Fri 29th April with a hot and cold buffet. Learn Spanish at Caribe the easy way every Thur. morning at 10am. Call Monica 679 564 685. russells British store has a great stock of favourite British products. We have a frozen foods section and also stock cleaning products, toiletries and even pet food. Each month we have special offers in store, so call in to see our April offers; plus we have a wide selection of Easter Eggs. Don't forget we have our other store just across the road – Russells Regalos – stocking a wide range of cards and gifts for all occasions and Mothers Day on 3rd April come down to Russells for your boxes of chocolates, cards and gifts.

LEws Fish & ChiPs traditional English Fish & Chips Eat in or take away Edf ruselo, avda Faro tel: 952 532 633 Now showing ‘Live English Football’

32

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a t s o C ToSererpoagxes 28 - 39 CardioDance: Learn to salsa, cha cha, swing and hustle to an aerobic workout. Dance classes also held in all these, plus rumba, sal cha and choreographed routines. 606 086300 Email: hughgrant@tiscali.co.uk Roast meat meals are served all day every day at the Continental Cafe Bar and Bistro.

Choose from beef, lamb, pork, gammon or chicken with as many vegetables as you like for only 6.90â‚Ź. Join us on Tues nights from 9pm for our fun quiz. Darts night is on Wed in our upstairs darts room. Thurs night is karaoke; Fri night live music and dancing and on Sun, live sports and Sun lunches. On Fri 29th April come and watch the Royal Wedding with us. Visit the Continental for Scotland on the Costa Visti i-dea for all your printing needs; flyers,

posters, tri-folds, menus, business cards or shop signs. Open 9am-2pm and from 4.30pm7.30pm.

Regular events at Los amigos include line dancing on Mon from 7pm, Karaoke with Rockin Robin or Johnny Hollywood on Fri nights and every Sun we have chill jam Sessions. Additional for April we have a table top sale on 2nd at 10,30. We are celebrating our first anniversary on Sat 16th April with Andy Time and Johnny Hollywood. Sat 23rd we have an Elvis Tribute Night with Aaron Richie and Fri 9th come and join us for afternoon tea and a free glass of bubbly whilst watching the Royal wedding. Our quiz nights in April are on Wed 13th and 27th both starting at 9pm. yo Jive Modern Jive Dance Classes are held every Tues night at El Ancla del Cirilo, a fabulous location right on the beach on Calle Penoncillo N340 between Torrox Costa and Nerja.

Classes start at 8.30pm and beginners are always welcome. You do not need a partner; come by yourself or bring a friend.

To advertise call 664 210 468 or email sales@thesentinella.com

33 105

Torrox

Join us at restaurante El Pino in Torrox Park.

2 for 1 meals only 6.95€ Mon-Thurs. Fri night fish & chips night, buy two meals & get a free bottle of wine. Sun lunches early bird option (reservations req.) eat before 1.30pm & buy one meal, receive one 1/2 price! Sun lunches served 12.30-9.30pm & in April we have Treat 'Mum' to Sun lunch on Mothers Day, 3rd & also Easter Sun 24th, all at our normal Sun lunch prices of 3 courses for only 11.00€ (bookings recommended. "Corrie" fans can join us for an audience with LES BATTERSBY! on Mon 4th.

A whole night of fun, laughter and great music with TV comedian compere "Oliver", then music til Midnight with Johnny Hollywood. Entrance by ticket only 12.50€ incl. Rovers Return Supper! Limited tickets so get yours NOW! Live Music on Fri 8th with Geoff Merrell . Wed 20th-R.E.P's Club Easter Egg Draw from 5pm, Free Buffet for all members & music with Johnny Hollywood. Fri 22nd-R.E.P's Club trip to Mijas Races departing 9.30am. A Pig Roast BBQ & terrace party! to celebrate the Royal Wedding on the Fri 29th 10€. This will be served after the offical Wedding that will be shown on the Large Screen TV. Music is by Katie (The English Rose), singing all the great British songs along with popular hits.

Visit the Light of india Indian Restaurant Laguna Beach, now offering an ‘all you can

eat’ menu for just 9.95€.

Devour traditional English fish and chips from Lew´s Fish & Chips. Eat in or take away!

Join us at Cafe Bar Nautico for our Royal Wedding Traditional Street party on Fri 29th.

Smart dress code (in royal colours). Free buffet & glass of bubbly with a short quiz afterwards. Our afternoon quiz is on the 5th and 19th April and we have darts night every alternate Wed 6th and 20th, new players welcome.

Dress up your egg on Easter Sunday and bring it down to enter our competition. redhouse signmakers. Suppliers and designers of all types of signs - shops, pavement boards, estate agency ‘for sale’ boards, vehicle advertising, windows, banner stands and more. New telephone number: 675 091 982.

Email redhousesigns@yahoo.co.uk Website: www.redhousesigns.com If you are after a great curry at an unbelievable price and you love a good munch then pay taj Mahal a visit where you can eat as much as you like for just 9.95€.

Please mention The Sentinella when responding to adverts.

New additional Product Line from

-Infrared Heating Elements with partial storage heater – frameless white -More Power/Watt for your money!

-Approved Redwell® Quality 600 W 900 W 1,400 W

for the price of for the price of for the price of

350 W 600 W 900 W

Contact us or visit the exhibition at our shop:

Redwell, Dipl.- Ing. Svend Scharler, Avda. El Faro, Bl. 75, bajo 9, Torrox Costa phone: 952539742, mobile: 606423869, Email: sscharler@gmx.de

www.redwell.com, www.redwell.es

Sue & Carsten offer you a very warm welcome

We have new Danish & English specialities on the menu Try our Danish Rullepølse on Ryebread or Sue’s Mexican Pie Jam session every Tuesday night at 9pm Wednesday 20th April - International quiz night starting at 8pm PRIZE Karaoke every Friday night at 9pm with “Rocking Martin the Muse”

SPECIAL !! SPECIAL !! ROCK & ROLL NIGHT! ELVIS IS BACK...

Saturday 9th April at 9pm & Thursday 21st April at 9pm Open from 11.30am to late 6 days a week Closed Thursdays (except 21st April)

Tel: 952 967 734

Find us on Paseo Maritimo, Torrox Costa At the end of Avda. El Faro, down the steps and we are on the right just before Flamenco Fusion

Find us on

Sands & C

Clinica Casa Blanca Clinic for:

OSTEOPATHY

THE BOWEN TECHNIqUE

Massage, Lymphatic drainage, Shiatsu, Reiki, Reflexology, Ear-Acupunture, Craniosacral Therapy Do you suffer from back problems, spinal misalignment, pain in neck or shoulders, joint discomfort, tightness in muscles, internal ailments, migraines, fibromyalgy or do you just want relaxation from stress?

The Bowen Technique is gentle and works on the whole body for inflammation, illness and pain. The treatment is safe and appropriate for everyone, from newborn babies to the frail and elderly.

Forever living products: inc. Minerals and Aloe Vera Products etc.

Also home visits Ask about gift vouchers Urb. Jardines del Mar, Blq C3, Torrox Costa (near garden Centre, 1km direction Nerja)

email: clinicacasablanca@gmail.com

www.clinica-casa-blanca.com

Tel: 952 967 628 or 659 374 673

C S

CLINICA EUROPA English Dentist:

Medicine

Dr. Michael Mannish B.D.S. (univ. of London)

w General Medicine

DENTAL EMERGENCIES -

w Paediatrics

648 203 157

Harley St. Dentist of 25 years

w Physiotherapy, Osteopherapy

Take advantage of your free 2nd opinion

w Acupuncture

before you start your treatment.

w Esthetic anti-ageing Medicine without surgery

Competitive prices

w Special Treatment for Fibromyalgia

teeth(call whitening in 1 hour for more information) New: Implant specialist

New in Spain & only in the Málaga Province!

Stress Treatment Why live with Stress or Anxiety?

The excessive physical & emotional tension accumulated during a long time might cause significant disorders like; cardiovascular, digestive, neurologic & immune system diseases

Anti Stress

Azenta helps you to;

wReduce anxiety wDiminish insomnia wReduce nervousness wIncrease energy wReinforce the immune system, therefore improving health wImprove concentration & memory wBetter mental clarity wFortify the nervous system wRelieve muscular pains & headaches wImprove personal relationships

Treatments Anxiety

Azenta

Insomnia Health & research Increased Energy

Centro Internacional, Blq. 86, TORROX COSTA

Tel: 952 53 09 08

clinicaeuropatorroxcosta@gmail.com

hotel riu Torrox Costa

We specialise in Ribs, Wings, Steaks and Chicken ibs!!!

Not just R QUIZ NIGHT Last Saturday in the month SUNDAYS - 3 course lunch Bookings advisable Credit Cards taken torrox Costa - Block 88 (Next to tennis courts & auto 2000) tel: 95 253 2369 / 696 516 534 Closed Mondays

Hair by Patsy:

Cuts, re-style, colour & tints, foil highlights, perming or just wash and blow dry.

Our Salon also offers Beauty & Massage treatments including Reflexology and Indian Head Massage.

Gift Vouchers available.

For an appointment call: Patsy: 679 562 328 Mo: 663 564 699 Hotel: 952 52 75 94 Ask for the Peluqueria tuesdays - saturdays 10am - 7pm

Casa Maria Sky Sports

Jam Night - Mondays

(with hosts “Flip” & “Aqui te Partie”)

ESPN

Wii Night - Wednesdays - 6pm Happy Hour Mondays - Saturdays - 5.30pm - 7pm Sundays 12pm - 4pm (1€ bottle, 2€ pint San Miguel, 1€ glass of wine)

Easter Sunday 24th April - BBQ - Live Music with “Johnny Hollywood” and Easter Bonnet Parade from 2pm Friday 29th April - Royal Fancy Dress - Watch the Wedding here followed by a Disco with “Duncan” - FREE Buffet

Parties & Functions catered for Open 11am - Late 7 days a week Call: 667 954 901 or 664 259 968 Torrox Park (bar on the goat track) www.casamarias.webs.com

HARLEKIN BAR - CAFÉ Open early till late everyday!!

DraUght BEErs

san Miguel Blackthorn Cider guinness alhambra

See our Daily Specials Board

Come and join Robert, Nicole & Andreea for Good Company and Good Food.

Relax and enjoy one of our Great Beers, a glass of wine or something a little stronger!

Hotel Riu

Block 6

e We ar

Torrox Costa

Bar FOOD

gOOD FOOD

Sunday Roast Lunch (Bookings Advisable)

Burgers sandwiches toasties all Day Breakfasts

Authentic Indian Curries

h e re

TORROX COSTA For more info:

952 531 804

All Sporting Action Live on Big Screens

HARLEKIN BAR - CAFÉ FUN & GAMES

All games available on demand - call for more information.

BINGO

Mondays 3pm Fridays 8pm

Bingo

Spin to Win

HORSE RACING

Saturdays 8pm

3pm - 6pm with Spin to Win Horse Racing

Open the Box

Quiz Nite

Higher or Lower

QUIZ NITE

Wednesdays 8pm

HAPPY HOURS

KARAOKE

ALL DAY EVERYDAY Open the Box Higher or Lower

Sundays 8pm

Karaoke

Deal or Not

40

Please mention The Sentinella when responding to adverts

zzi

the of B ale a md Pitt t k a ra loo d... B e l w or th on leb w m e c is Th

ra a p Pa Profile

Name: Brad Pitt Birthday: December 18th, 1963 age: 48 sign: Sagittarius Birthplace: Shawnee, Oklahoma hometown: Los Angeles, California Facts about Brad Pitt Brad Pitt actually goes by his middle name. His formal name is William Bradley Pitt.

Brad walked out on the movie, Troy, during the official screening. His actions caused outrage at the Cannes Film Festival.

It is reported that Brad Pitt quit smoking for months in 2004 to prepare for the physical scenes of the movie, Troy. After the movie was completed, he allegedly went back to smoking.

During the filming of Mr. and Mrs. Smith both Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie allegedly had to repeatedly seek medical attention. There was a flu virus going around the set and because of the hot scenes in the movie, Brad and Angelina were re-infecting one another over and over.

As a young adult Brad Pitt had acne. However, you won’t see the scars on his face as it has been removed by dermabrasion.

Before becoming a mega star Brad worked as a pool boy, a chauffeur a delivery man and a giant chicken mascot for a restaurant!

Brad was once once engaged to Gwyneth Paltrow for three years. Later he was married to Jennifer Aniston and now he shares four children with Angelina Jolie.

Brad has been on the cover pages of many American magazines including Entertainment Weekly, Premiere, USA Weekend, People, Maxim, Rolling Stone, TV Guide, PlayGirl and many more.

Brad has been on the cover page of many international magazines like Movie Star (Japan), Woman's Day (Australia), Tribute (Canada), Max (Italy), Film Review (UK), Prestige (France), Cinema (Hungary), AD Magazine (Netherlands), Premiere (Russia) and many more.

Brad has co-designed a jewellery line with Damiani. His ex-wife Jennifer Aniston modelled for the ads. The contract was a settlement after he sued Damiani because they sold copies of the couple's wedding ring, designed by Brad and created by Damiani.

Brad shares a birthday with Katie Holmes, Christina Aguilera, DMX, Ray Liotta, film critic Leonard Maltin, Casper Van Dien and filmmaker Steven Spielberg.

Brad met his ex-wife Jennifer Aniston on a blind date, which was arranged by their agent.

Angelina Jolie has reportedly changed her childrens' last names from Jolie to Jolie-Pitt Jolie and Pitt have one child together and three adopted ones. Jolie first adopted Maddox in March, 2002. Jolie and Pitt adopted Zahara in 2005 and Pax in 2003 together.

On May 27, 2006, Jolie and Pitt’s biological daughter Shiloh was born.

To advertise call 664 210 468 or email sales@thesentinella.com

41

Cómpeta Cómpeta appears by name in written records for the first time in 1487, when the corregidor (magistrate) of Vélez, which by then was in the hands of the Christians, urged the population to submit to the new owners. This indicates that until that date the place must have been no more than a farming community.

Cómpeta stands at the foot of the impressive Tejeda and Almijara Sierras; a Moorish village, where vines are an important element in the landscape as well as the economy.

The layout of the streets and the architecture of the whitewashed houses gives Cómpeta a unique seal of identity. They make up what is known as the Mudejar Route (Ruta del Mudéjar).

Cómpeta's village centre is one of the most spectacular in the province, its architectural highlight being Our Lady's Church.

Los Caballos del Mosquin Cómpeta

Explore Andalucia on horseback during the long summer evenings or early mornings.

Watch the wildlife come to life.

Prices from 30€

Tel: 608 658 108

www.horseriding-andalucia.com email: caballosmosquin@hotmail.com

Cómpeta suffered at the hands of the major tremor known as the Andalusian Earthquake on Christmas Day 1884; material damage included the destruction of several houses and the spire of the parish church. Another tragedy befell the village almost immediately afterwards; a serious outbreak of cholera decimated Cómpeta's population in the summer of 1885.

Traditional medicine alongside alternative therapies … the best healthcare for your pet!

Benajarafe N-340 Málaga-Almería, 164 29790, Benajarafe Tel: 952 51 32 07

Cómpeta Avda. de la Constitución, 15 29754 Cómpeta Tel: 952 55 38 50

24 Hour Emergencies : 617 001 723

www.naturvets.com

Save up to 50% compared to conventional retaining walls

Dry-stone Gabion Walls Do it yourself or we supply and erect.

Up to 50% saving against conventionally built stone walls

Do it yourself kits supplied with full instructions and advice or we can supply and erect using our own fully qualified staff.

All products delivered direct from the manufacturer in the UK No planning required No architects drawings No long waits for building licences Suitable for landslips, retaining wall solutions & ornate landscaping All Gabion baskets are guaranteed for over 50 years against corrosion Gabions act as natural drainage so no water diversions are necessary No sand or cement needed

For a FREE no obligation quote & site survey call:

952 516 218 / 660 792 282 O r vi s i t our new we b si te

www.gabionspain.com / gabionspain@gmail.com

rEF. 4958

tOrrOX ViLLa 143M 2 rEF. 4973

tOrrOX tOwNhOUsE 27M 2 rEF. 5116

CóMPEta ViLLa 120M 2

OUR EASTER OFFER VILLA: VILLAGE HOUSE - OFFER: 10 MINS TO THE COAST: 2 BEDS, GUEST APARTMENT, 2 BATHS, BIG TERRACE AREA, POOL, GARAGE, ROOF TERRACE, FURNISHED, CAR INCLUDED, LAND 3932M2

1 BED, 1 BATH, KITCHEN, LOUNGE, ROOF TERRACE, GOOD ACCESS, SOLD FURNISHED, NEEDS SOME RENOVATION

BEAUTIFUL VILLA, 3 BEDS, 3 BATHS, POOL, GARAGE, VERY GOOD LOCATION BETWEEN TORROX & CóMPETA, 400 M TRACK, SEA VIEWS

PriCE 200,000€

PriCE 49,000€

PriCE 320,000€

rEF. 5117

tOrrOX tOwNhOUsE 77M 2

LONG TERM RENTAL SPECIALS MONTHLY

rEF. 5068

arChEz FiNCa 144M 2

TR 30 – TORROX 2 BEDS – TOWNHOUSE - 330 €

BIG TOWNHOUSE: AUTHENTIC FAMILY HOUSE, 3 BEDS, 2 BATHS, CENTRAL LOCATION, PARKING NEARBY, BIG ROOF TERRACE WITH OUTSIDE KITCHEN

CR 10 - SAYALONGA 2 BEDS – POOL – HEATING 700 € € CR 53 - CóMPETA 2 BEDS - APARTMENT GARAGE - 450 € € CR 04 - CóMPETA 3 BEDS - VILLA - POOL HEATING - 850 € €

WORTH A VISIT: AUTHENTIC FINCA, 4 BEDS, 1 BATH, POOL, SEVERAL TERRACES, GOOD ACCESS 700M TRACK, LAND 2,000M2

PriCE 329,500€ PriCE 195,000€ Cómpeta: Plaza almijara, 21 - 29754 Cómpeta - tel: (0034) 952 516 178 torrox: Calle Ortigosa, 7 - 29700 torrox - tel: (0034) 952 539 125

Email: sales@countryproperties.net

www.countryproperties.net

Cómpeta Properties S.L. Always at your service

Avda. Sayalonga 24B, Cómpeta (Málaga) Tel: (0034) 952 516 107 Avda. Constitución 37B, Cómpeta (Málaga) Tel: (0034) 952 55 35 89 www.competaproperties.com info@competaproperties.com Cómpeta Now reduced to 59,000€

Cómpeta

Just reduced to 84,000€

Ref: TH146 Sole Agent Nice property in need of renovation with many possibilities.

45m2 build at present, 21m2 terrace. Ideal for somebody looking to make their first step on to the Spanish property ladder. Full title deeds. Water & electricity connected. Prices available to carry out the necessary work.

Cómpeta Only 149,000€

Ref: TH247 Charming traditional townhouse situated within easy reach of all local amenities. 2/3 beds, 1 bath, 50m2 build, 10m2 terrace. Typical village house which, with a little care and attention to detail, could be renovated into a wonderful home with old world charm and modern amenities.

Canillas de Albaida

Ref: V422 Charming established villa situated on the edge of one of the beautiful Natural Parks of Spain and within walking distance of the village.

2 beds, 1 bath, 75m2 build, 660m2 plot, plunge pool. Must be seen to be appreciated!

Ref: TH285 Charming property with beautiful views down over the village and across the Mediterranean, situated on the outskirts of this lovely village. 3 beds, 1 bath, 1 WC, 100m2 build, 3 terraces + a patio with summer kitchen.

Now reduced to 156,000€

Cómpeta

Now reduced to 89,000€

Ref: AP074 Lovely one bedroom apartment (can be converted in to 2 bedrooms) on outskirts of Cómpeta and within walking distance of the village.

Communal pool. Large terrace with stunning views.

Cómpeta

Now reduced to 210,000€

Ref: V354 Lovely country property, less than 15 minutes from the coast.

Incredible views over the verdant countryside and to the mountains.

2 beds, 2 baths, 100m2 build.

2,500m2 plot. Good access.

Reformed to good taste. Gas central heating makes this property comfortable all year around. Must be seen!

In conjunction with Cómpeta Properties S.L. Construction & Services “Care and quality combined” Avda. Sayalonga 24A, Cómpeta (Málaga) Tel/Fax: (0034) 952 55 34 35 celefernandez@competaproperties.com

hOtEL BaLCON DE CóMPEta

C/San Antonio, 75 Cómpeta

Tel: 952 55 36 62/35 35

Fax: 952 51 67 80

Email: info@hotel-competa.com www.hotel-competa.com “hotelbalcon”

Restaurante Maria Everyone welcome inc. non-residents Fine Dining at Modest Prices

Enjoy crisp, white table linen, friendly service and carefully prepared dishes in our elegant restaurant Open Fridays, Saturdays & Sundays 7.30pm - 10.00pm

Special menu of the month!!

3 courses & a bottle of Rioja per couple - 16€pp To further enhance your evening stay the night for only 30€pp including breakfast (including non diners) Bookings recommended Present this advert to receive your FREE gift!

Easter 2011

Day

- Special Activities “Enjoy the Environment” aCtiVitiEs tiME

Option 2 Option 3 Mountain Trekking Mountain Bikes

Option1 Jeep Tour

Saturday 23rd April

9am 4pm

Mountain Bikes

Jeep Tour

Mountain Trekking

Sunday 24th April

9am

Mountain Trekking

Mountain Bikes

Jeep Tour

One night’s stay Two night’s stay

1 Activity 55€ 70€

2 Activities 82€ 98€

3 Activities 85€ 100€

Prices per person in a double room All activities are available throughout Easter - Prices may vary so please enquire beforehand

Make your booking in April for June, July, August & September and get 15% discount off normal prices (except 15th August which is minimum 4 nights and normal prices)

46

Please mention The Sentinella when responding to adverts

Please Tell Me It Won’t Happen To Us!!

Old people are great aren’t they? But after these, maybe I just don’t want to be one.....

Two elderly women were out driving in a large car and both could barely see over the dashboard. As they were cruising along, they came to a junction. The light was red, but they just went on through. The woman in the passenger seat thought to herself 'I must be losing it. I could have sworn we just went through a red light.' After a few more minutes, they came to another junction and the light was red. Again, they went right through. The woman in the passenger seat was almost sure that the light had been red but was really concerned that she was losing it. She was getting nervous.

At the next junction, sure enough, the light was red and they went on through. So, she turned to the other woman and said, “Mildred, did you know that we just ran through three red lights in a row? You could have killed us both!”

Mildred turned to her and said, “Oh, Heck, am I driving?

REMOVALS

SPAIN - UK - SPAIN and LOCAL

------------------------------------------------------------Three retirees, each with a hearing difficulty, were playing golf one fine March day. One remarked to the other. "Windy, isn't it?"

"No," the second man replied, it's Thursday" And the third man joined in, “So am I, let's have a beer."

------------------------------------------------------------Two elderly ladies had been friends for many decades. Over the years, they had shared all kinds of activities and adventures. Lately, their activities had been limited to meeting a few times a week to play cards.

One day, they were playing cards when one looked at the other and said, “Now don't get mad at me. I know we've been friends for a long time, but I just can't think of your name!

I've thought and thought, but I can't remember it. Please tell me what your name is.”

Her friend glared at her for at least three minutes; she just stared and glared at her. Finally she said, “How soon do you need to know?”

SAXON S.L JcB digger Hire velez-Malaga Area

Full/Part Loads good rates Call: 663 515 341 / 655 251 207

SAT. CO

invites you to our no obligation demonstration of High definition (HD) Television Technology.

Held every Saturday starting 2pm near Hotel Viñuela.

Ring to book your place.

657 484 853 (Free drinks and nibbles while you enjoy the demonstration!)

FreeSat+HD, Sky+ HD, Spanish TV, 3DTV etc.

sErvicEs *LAndscAPE GArdEninG *cArPEntry * stOrM dAMAGE *LAndsLidEs And trAcK cLEArinG *PLUs ALL MAnnEr OF diGGinG UndErtAKEn

662 39 83 72 / 678 23 22 53 Email: saxonsl@live.co.uk

POOL TABLE

BAR ATILA

INTERNET ACCESS FREE WI-FI

Kitchen open Mon, Tues, Wed & Fri 12pm - 8pm Sat 12pm - 7pm Sun 12pm - 5pm Open everyday at 12pm Closed Thursdays throughout April Mother’s Day & Easter Sunday Roast Dinner BINGO IS BACK ON MONDAYS!!

Monday nights - 8pm - Bingo Tuesday nights - 8.30pm - Quiz Wednesdays / Sundays - 2pm - Pool Club Happy Hour - Mon - Fri 6pm - 7pm (Mahou 1.25€ pint, non-branded spirit & mixer 1.75€) Draught Worthingtons - 3€ Draught Carling - 2.50€ Draught Strongbow - 3€

SKY SPORTS

All Live football shown Premiership games & lower leagues 4pm game every Saturday Grand National F1 Motor Racing

ESPN

All in FULL HD!!

For information or bookings call: 685 552 529 C/Buena Vista, Puente don Manuel www.atilas.freezoka.com

48

To advertise call 664 210 468

Dedication This beautiful poem is for all the mums out there, to say Happy Mother's Day! It's especially for our (Keidi and Kami) mum, Roisheen, who is a God-send in our lives and who is always there to listen, help, advise and love...

Thanks a million mum - you're the best! xxx She was there at the beginning When the world was new to you, She was there to turn to happy times Those when, you were hurt or blue.

She was there to listen to your thoughts And when you asked, to give advice, She was there to tell you, "Those don't match!"

Or, "Hon, you sure look nice."

DOES YOUR SEPTIC TANK NEED CLEANING? Call us and we will come & empty your septic tank.

(Certified)

CONSTRUCTIONS & RENOVATIONS

652 65 60 66 Competa, Malaga www.construccionesschmid.com E-mail: construccionesschmid@hotmail.com

â‚ŹUrO COiN

ELECtriC MEtErs

Ideal for landlords & holiday properties. Perfect to control expensive & excessive use of a/c units, etc.

Contact Phil Watts PW Electrical Services SC tel: 647 006 140 / 678 442 402 Email: philwatts952@hotmail.com

General Builder She was there with you at nighttime To help you say your prayers, She was there to tell you, "It's alright."

When you had a dream that scares.

She was there at morning time To get you up and out of bed, She was there when you didn't feel good (or did) To say, "You'd best stay home, instead."

She was there when you were hungry And when you had those dirty clothes, She was there when you needed her (How she knew? Only heaven knows.)

She was there at the beginning And she'll be there your whole life through, She'll be there in your mind and heart Just like a mother is supposed to do.

30 year’s Experience From Full Renovations to a Brick BBQ No Job too Big or Small Please call to discuss your needs

609 915 770

Spanish Number Plates a Car Transfers aDriving Licences aInterpreting aOther Paperwork Sara Bright

951 167 094 / 658 501 610

HEATING - COOLING - SOLAR SALES - SERVICE - MAINTENANCE Mobile: 606 242 213 www.sunshinewoodwork.co.uk sunshinewoodwork@live.co.uk

Constant climates using the latest inverter technology Covering all the Axarquia region

We have chicken coops for rent or sale

Fencing, gates, pergolas, car ports, decking, borders, garden swings chairs, garden tables and chairs, trellis in all sizes, plant pots and lots, lots more....

Tlfn: (+34) 669 899 065 Email: acecarrental@hotmail.co.uk www.acecarrental.biz

Urb. Lomas del Sol nº4 Benajarafe Alto, 29790 MALAGA - SPAIN

Michael/Maria Reeve Airport pick-up and delivery

Long term winter car rates

from 375€

per calender month

aUtOCOOL The only mobile service specialising solely in car air-con systems.

Get your a/c serviced now before next summer and before it lets you down.

Have your headlights gone opaque or yellow?

Before This is now a fail on After the ITV test so get them professionally refinished.

For both services call Mike now on 951 321446 or 616 264067 www.autocoolspain.com

Pest Control Wasp Nests Cockroaches & Hornets TERMINATED

609 915 770 CAR BOOT SALE OLD & NEW 1st Sunday of every month Restaurant El Pantano 9.30am - 1.30pm

(On the A356 towards Colmenar, overlooking the lake) Call Lynn 669 600 419 Sandra 619 471 301

To advertise call 664 210 468 or email sales@thesentinella.com

51

Direct Telecom Direct is always best Direct Telecom is a British-owned company based in Spain. Established for more than 10 years, it provides telecoms services for the expat community on the Costa del Sol. It offers a wide range of communication services such as ADSL internet, mobile services, mobile internet and ‘Low Cost Calls.’ It can also help clients deal with Telefonica paperwork, order a new line or change an existing one. Because there is customer service and technical support in English, German, Scandinavian and Spanish, you can always talk to someone in your own language. Whoever you are and wherever you go, you want to make sure you are paying the lowest rates for your calls while you are on the move. If you want to enjoy a fast and reliable internet connection, backed up by a multi-lingual technical support service for less than 1€ per day, take a closer look at the possibilities which will no doubt fulfil your requirements and exceed your expectations. Save up to 88% with its Low Cost Call service and switch your land line rental to Direct Telecom with DT One Bill.

Here is everything you need in order to save money with just one company!

The headquarters of the company are in Tenerife but it has an office in Palm Tree Avenue, Benalmadena Costa to offer personalised services to all its clients on the Costa del Sol .

In a recent survey, Direct Telecom’s customers rated its customer service as ‘excellent,’ and that´s because the most important thing for this company is: “Our customers.”

See main advert on page 11

Pinguinitos Swim School Nerja Property Sales & Rentals Property Management / Maintenance Investment opportunities on property in the Caribbean VIE Cosmetics and Homeware Tel: 666 135 516 www.spanishmanagement.com

Take a Break

Take time to relax, meet with your friends or a weekend away, reassured that your loved one is in safe hands.

NVQ qualified Level 3, CRB registered, NHS approved. 8 years experience with mental health, learning disabilities, challenging behaviour, alzheimas & dementure

*Classes for all ages of children starting from 3 months *UK qualified teacher *Technique clinic for older children *Small friendly classes *Private adult lessons available Call: 662 463 452 www.swimbabynerja.com

The English Rose “KATIE” Female Vocalist Music to suit all ages from 40’s - 10’s Call: 672 973 513

“Karaoke Mann” & Discos

Thousands of song choices

Willing to travel Contact Steve Taplin: 622 239 317

Call: 628 236 661

Precious

Moroccan Adventure Tours

Hand Crafted Jewellery ...as individual as you are

Available at Divas, Puente don Manuel, Alcaucin (next to Moreno’s Bar) Tel: 618 928 852

www.preciousjewellerybykaren.co.uk

Car Boot

E ve r y S at urd ay at

C hi r in gui t o An t on i o Ve n t a B aj a

10a m - 2 pm

O n l y 3€ p e r p it ch B ook i n gs ad vi s ab l e

Tel: 6 09 8 14 0 28

2/3/4 nights, coastal village.

Chefchaouen and the Rif Mountains.

Including driver with 4x4. Ferry, Top quality accommodation, meals & local guides.

Groups of 2-10 people.

Also available, escorted day trips to Andalucian white villages and mountain drives.

Phone: 663 458 348 / 690 771 209

MANN & VAN

UK Moves and Back Local Removals

20€ per hour Call Barry: 628 236 661

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Orange Grove Services We catch up again with Mark from Orange Grove Kitchens. kaMi - Mark, Orange Grove seems to be changing; what’s happening?

Mark - Well, Mark from Mtek, with whom I’ve been working for the last two years, is coming on board and we are launching Orange Grove Services. kaMi - What has made you do this?

Mark - You cannot stand still in this industry you have to continually evolve. Both of us are always being asked to recommend other trades, such as plastering, decorating and removals. kaMi - So what does Mark from Mtek offer Orange Grove Services?

Mark - He is a City & Guilds trained mechanical and electrical engineer, and has all the relevant training and qualifications to carry out plumbing and gas installations to UK regulations, along with IEE regulation electrical faultfinding and diagnostics. He is also the preferred installer and repair service for Nekar gas water heaters. kaMi - What has business been like so far this year?

Mark - It’s been good. A lot of people seem to be struggling but we have been fairly steady, and have noticed a good improvement on this time last year.

I think there is a positive side to a recession for good contractors and trades; it does tend to clear out the dead wood in the industry.

I think everybody knows there are a lot of people who are not what they say they are, and they rarely survive in this climate! kaMi - Do you and Mark work well together?

Mark - We do, both of us have a ‘can do’ attitude, and a similar ethos when it comes to looking after a customer.

We always advise them honestly and never try to sell them what they don’t need. We are both very good at coming up with cost effective solutions for problems and we are also both ageing footballers who play in the same position, but for different clubs, so Monday mornings can be full of aches and pains if we’ve both played on a Sunday!

KAMI - Is it only residential properties that you cover?

MARK - No, our biggest client is the Hotel Palacio Blanco in Velez Malaga; we take care of all their maintenance issues from a squeaky door to maintaining the massive jacuzzi on the roof. We also look after Bar Flandria, Bar Nautico and Video Club Warner in Torrox, and we’re currently working on a shop fitting quote for a physiotherapist in Torre Del Mar. kaMi - So what are your goals for Orange Grove Services this year?

MARK - We will see Orange Grove become a one-point contact for all our clients, because if we can’t do it, we will know who can.

Such is the demand that we are looking to include a cleaning service, but there is a lot of unregulated competition. In addition to this, we are looking to work with estate agents, offering a service to modernise properties that are not selling, to make them more attractive to buyers.

KAMI - You mentioned that you were doing a special offer this month. What is it?

MARK - Mark the electrician is doing an electrical inspection of your house and a written report for €30.00, and he is offering a boiler clean and test at the same price.

I am offering to ease those doors that never shut, latch or rub on the floor, for €15.00 per door. This offer will run through April.

KAMI - OK thanks guys. So if your doors don’t work and the lights keep going out while you’re sitting in a lukewarm bath, call Mark or Mark on 661 713 238 or 617 839 660 See main advert opposite

O

RANGE

G

ROVE

Services

kitchens Electrical services Plumbing Carpentry Plastering tiling Painting & Decorating “The savings we make by not having a high street shop or sales staff are passed on to you. I´m confident we can beat any high street quote”.

Let us quote for your kitchen.

What have you got to lose??

Tel: 661 713 238 or 617 839 660

References & visits to past customers available.

Kitchens to suit all budgets email:lastgamesoon@hotmail.com

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g n i z a Am mals Ani

s thi up to g in al commamm r atches. e en! a s t te r h E at bet the H t i at w wh han Wh onth, udy t st m Nine egg yolks have been found in one chicken egg.

A mother hen turns her egg approximately 50 times in a day. This is so the yolk does not stick to the shell.

To produce a dozen eggs, a hen has to eat about four pounds of feed.

The largest chicken egg ever laid weighed a pound and had a double yolk and shell.

A chicken with red earlobes will produce brown eggs, and a chicken with white earlobes will produce white eggs.

Hens will produce larger eggs as they grow older.

A chicken loses its feathers when it becomes stressed.

A chicken once had its head cut off and survived for over eighteen months, headless.

An egg takes the hen 25 hours to make, so at most, a hen can lay 6 eggs per week.

When hens are young, they lay small eggs; as they get older, the eggs get larger, and aren't laid as frequently.

The hen puts the shell on the egg just as it is laid. It takes about 10 seconds to harden.

Ink Cartridges Compatible or Original Epson compatible ink cartridges 6.00â‚Ź each Visit us at the following markets Trapiche = Tuesday Frigiliana = Thursday Puente Don Manuel = Friday

For orders and delivery please contact:

636 298 538 sales@printerink.es

To advertise call 664 210 468 or email sales@thesentinella.com

57

Amazing Animals (Continued)

A Rotten Day

The hen always puts the same amount of calcium on her eggs, so small eggs have much thicker shells than large eggs because the calcium doesn't have to stretch as far.

Signs that you’re going to have the above…

Eggs have a natural protective coating called the ‘bloom,’ which gives the egg a slightly ‘matt’ finish.

Washing Grade A eggs before selling them to the public is illegal, as it removes this coating. In the nineteenth century in Ireland, a farmer could be put in jail for washing eggs.

By feeding hens certain dyes they can be made to lay eggs with varicoloured yolks.

1. You wake up face down on the pavement.

2. You put your bra on backwards and it fits better.

3. Your birthday cake collapses from the weight of the candles.

4. You want to put on the clothes you wore home from the party last night, and there aren't any.

5. You turn on the news and they're showing emergency routes out of the city.

6. Your twin sister forgot your birthday.

7. You walk to work and find your dress is stuck in the back of your knickers.

8. Your blind date turns out to be your ex-wife.

9. You put both contacts lenses in the same eye.

The Garden Restaurant presents

The Royal Wedding

on 29th April, 2011 Service at 12 noon (spanish time)

Join us to celebrate the wedding of William & Kate on our large HD TVs Various Brunch & Lunch menus from 6€ Everyone attending will receive a FREE glass of cava, wine or beer to toast the happy couple!!

Open at 10.30am for the build up prior to the service at 12 noon “Lads, Ladies & Gentlemen” ‘WEAR YOUR HAT’ to receive a prize for the most creative!!

Limited spaces - Book your table early!!

You can find us in La Viñuela area, near Puente don Manuel, 15 minute drive from the Torre del Mar coast “Look out for the flags & bunting” A real Street Party atmosphere!!!!

665 070 281 / 618 496 269

The Garden Restaurant

During April we will be closed Wednesdays & Thursdays

Breakfasts served from 10.30am Full English only 6€ (2 eggs, 2 bacon,

2 sausages, beans, tomatoes, mushrooms & 2 toast)

Half size - 4€

Dining Experience Weekend

EARLY BIRD SPECIAL!

Friday 15th & Saturday 16th April Tomato & Red Pepper Soup Breaded Musrooms with salad garnish & Ali oli or Cranberry compote dip Warm salad of Pears & Blue Cheese with Cherry Balsamic Dressing Salad with Caesar sauce & Goats Cheese and Walnuts ~~~~~~~~~~~~ Lamb Chops with Cumberland sauce Pork Medallions with Pepper sauce Chicken Breast with Pepper or Roquefort sauce Fresh Salmon with Dill sauce Ratatouille Pie with Peanut & Cheese Pastry Mushroom Risotto ~~~~~~~~~~~~ Fruits of the Forest Pavlova Hot Chocolate Fudge Cake with fresh Strawberries & cream Ice Cream Rose with fresh Strawberries, Strawberry sauce & fresh Mint ~~~~~~~~~~~~

Various choices of Starters & Mains or Mains & Desserts including a glass of wine or beer.

Now including Saturdays 6pm - 8pm

7.50€ ~~~~~~~ Mothering Sunday Lunch - 3rd April Bookings recommended

15€ per person

including a glass of cava, wine or beer

Sunday Roast

Choice of 3 meats (or comb. of 2 meats)

1pm - 6.30pm (last orders) 3 courses only 10€ Easter Sunday - Book early!!

Please call for more information:

665 070 281 / 618 496 269 Available for private functions, Birthdays, etc. with special menus or meals of your choice

To Puente don Manuel

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The Word Queen This month we’re going to explore some more ways in which you can come up with ideas for your books.

The best ideas begin with yourself! Study the list below to delve deeper… what are you good at? We all have unique skills and talents so write a list of yours. They can stretch right back to when you were a child, all the way up until the here and now. Try not to strain your brain too hard and do include smaller talents too. your Past Experiences. What’s happened to you throughout your life which is particularly interesting/funny or even scary? All our experiences can be used as ammunition for book ideas. Examples include suffering from a particular illness, overcoming a challenge, or succeeding at something. your knowledge. At school, what subjects did you shine at? What jobs have you held in the past? What are your hobbies? Do you like horse riding? Yoga? Cross stitch? what Do you Enjoy Most in Life? Your true

passions are great to write about as you’ll enjoy the process hugely. Jamie Oliver loves cooking and he has written a number of books, sharing his recipes with the world. What could you share with the world? Whatever you like rest assured that millions of others will too and if you can incorporate a fresh twist on the topic, then you’ll be on to a winner! your Challenges. At the time challenges in life never feel like opportunities, but believe me, they're the biggest ones that exist! What have you overcome or learnt that you could share with other people? Knowing that you are helping others via your books is an enlightening experience.

There…now lots of idea seeds have been sown, so you have no more excuses not to write your book!!

Love & light The Word Queen x If you have written a book and you’d like to get it published, or if you’re just after some impartial advice, email The Word Queen on info@thewordqueen.com or see her advert opposite.

Vanessa´s Traditional Sunday Lunch to share Chicken, Pork or Beef Always very popular so book early!

3 courses from 20€ per couple

The Lemon Tree “El Limonero” Lounge Bar

Light Bites & Specials served every evening Open Thursdays & Fridays from 6pm

Now Open from 1pm Saturdays & Sundays A GREAT PLACE TO BE! Friday 1st April - Fool’s Party!! Live Music with ‘Mr. Sister’. Fancy Dress Competition for the best dressed fools!!!

Saturday 2nd April - Table top sale 10am til 3pm.

3rd April Mother’s Day - Book your table for a special Sunday Roast!

Every Thursday evening - Come on you Boffins!!

Join our Fun Quiz with Cash Prizes Easter at the Lemon Tree - We are open from 1pm Thursday, Friday, Saturday & Sunday so join us for lunch or dinner before or after the famous El Paso play in Riogordo Private functions catered for Calle Vienteocho de Febrero Riogordo

(Turn right and right again at the Painted Star on the road)

Por informacion: the-lemon-tree@hotmail.co.uk

Call: 620 3535 94

Find us on

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Skynettv skynettv tel: 638 262 410 Email: sattvespana@gmail.com

April 17th, Premiership - Man City v tottenham hotspur (Sky Sports 1)

We are currently providing 3 TV packages with our receivers, giving unbelievable value for money. Each of these TV packages requires its own satellite dish, but can all be connected to the single receiver and you pay just 25€ per month.

April 17th, Premiership - arsenal v Liverpool (Sky Sports 1)

what are these tV packages? Full Sky package (1.2m dish or above required) Tring Sports (1m dish or above required) JSC Sports (1m dish or above required) satellite receivers - We now have 5 different receivers available offering different features – a FULL TV package is included on all our receivers, giving real VALUE FOR MONEY. -Standard Definition -Recordable (single tuner) -HD -HD / Recordable (single tuner) -HD / Recordable (twin tuner) special Offers on Multiple Boxes - Fancy more than one receiver (his & hers)? For multiple orders, pay ONLY 20€ per box on your subscription! Discounts are also given on installation costs for multiple boxes.

New Channels recently added: Premier Sports Premier Sports Extra Sky Atlantic Adult Channels here are just a few of this month’s football highlights on sky tV: april 2nd, Premiership - west ham v Man Utd (Sky Sports 2) April 3rd Premiership - Man City v sunderland (Sky Sports 1) April 5th & 6th, Champions League Quarter Final 1st Legs (Sky Sports 2 & 4) April 10th, Premiership - aston Villa v Newcastle United (Sky Sports 1) April 12th & 13th, Champions League Quarter Final 2nd Legs (Sky Sports 2 & 4) April 16th & 17th, scottish Cup semi Final (Sky Sports 1)

April 20th, Premiership - tottenham hotspur v arsenal (Sky Sports 2) April 21st, Centenary Shield - scotland v England (Sky Sports 2) April 23rd, Premiership - Man Utd v Everton (Sky Sports 2) April 23rd, Premiership - Chelsea v west ham (ESPN) April 26th & 27th, Champions League semi Final 1st Legs (Sky Sports 2) April 28th, Centenary Shield - republic of ireland V England (Sky Sports 1) April 30th, Premiership - Chelsea v tottenham hotspur (Sky Sports 2) aND that’s JUst thE FOOtBaLL!!!

And for those movie buffs: From Paris with Love (Sky Movies Premiere), John Travolta and Jonathan Rhys Meyers are the CIA agents out to stop a terrorist attack in Paris. Bullet-riddled action from the director of Taken. hot tub time Machine (Sky Movies Premiere) A group of loser pals get sent back to 1986 by a quantum-leaping hot tub, getting the chance to rectify the mistakes that messed up their lives. the Blind side (Sky Movies Premiere) When she discovers that her son's school friend has nowhere to live, the rich Tennessee mum takes him in and helps him overcome his impoverished background to fulfil his dreams as a pro American football star. greenberg (Sky movies Premiere) Cynical forty-something Roger Greenberg returns home to LA to house-sit for his brother, but struggles with a new romance as he faces up to his past mistakes.

Friday Market Chiringuito Antonio Puente Don Manuel Every Friday 10am - 1.30pm Over 30 stalls to choose from and growing!!

ONLy 1.50€ a PitCh!!!

rastro and Car Booters always welcome Bacon roll (with English Bacon) and a Coffee is only 2.50€ if you have something interesting to sell and would like to join us at the market as a stall holder then just turn up on the day by 9am see you there!!!

Paseo Maritimo (in front of children`s play park) torrox Costa Open every day at noon reservations on: 622 627 715 or 633 487 555 sOL y LUNa tOrrOX (Petr krulis) Relaxed bar with comfortable sofas and chilled atmosphere Czech Beer Czech speciality dishes !NEW! Menu for kids New pool table Football: All top Premier League Games, FA CUP, Champions League, UEFA Cup, Spanish League, International games. (List every week on Facebook) Jukebox with 60,000 songs

Exotic Cocktails - Live Music - Fireshows - Fiestas & Parties

Programme of Events - april 1st - Live music with vocalist Andy Time 2nd - Karaoke 8th - Weekend of Special new menu Karaoke 9th - Live music from afternoon till night 10th - Pool competition for 100€ voucher to spend at our bar 15th - Karaoke 16th - Full Moon party “ECLIPSE“ with live music 22nd - Karaoke 23rd - Party of San Jorge with live music 29th - Karaoke 30th - Salsa night Regarding live music see the details on facebook please

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Psychic Medium Energy Healer

It was a sunny morning and I went to a health shop where I do monthly readings and healings. My first client was a German lady. As she lay on the healing bed I felt an overwhelming pain in my head, which is always an indication of where I have to heal, then I scanned her body and picked up more information. I started giving her prana energy healing and within minutes she was in a deep sleep and I slipped into alpha mode. This is a feeling of complete calm where my senses respond to your body’s energy. When I had completed the healing I woke up my client and recommended three more healing sessions.

Seven days passed and back at the health shop I was greeted by Anna, the owner.

“I need to talk to you Mark,” she said.

She told me about the lady who I’d healed the week before and how she has been friends with her for over twenty years and most of the time she would just sit at home with thoughts flying around her head, plus she found it very difficult to sleep at night.

“It’s a miracle,” continued Anna. “Within hours of the healing her life changed. She can now think straight and she sleeps all night long.”

I felt so humbled at this positive news. I’m not sure exactly how it works, but the only thing that matters to me is helping people feel better. I care for people who struggle with life because I know that the world is an amazing place and life is truly wonderful. We all deserve help and if you are balanced you pass that good energy on to others. So next time you feel run down or you’re having trouble sleeping, maybe an energy healer can help…

Until next time, my friends!

See main advert opposite

Weston Kennels & Cattery Fully Licensed Kennels

A real home from home for your pets Over 18 years experience Collection Service Long stays our speciality We also have CAS dogs & cats looking for a home tel: 951 254 134 952 030 036

Email: terrygweston@yahoo.com we are on the torrox - Competa road, 100m from Pavo real

Pino Electricidad special Offer:

From:

special Offer:

59,95€

4,95€

43,95€

CEiLiNg FaN 4 paddles 3 speed 3 lamps

OUtDOOr Lights Various

CEiLiNg FaN 4 paddles 3 speed 70W

special Offer:

special Offer:

special Offer:

39,95€

36,95€

49,95€

PhiLLiPs Electric shaver

gas hOB 2 burners

ELECtriC OVEN 18 litres

special Offer:

special Offer:

special Offer:

24,95€

gLass BLENDEr 2 speed

9,95€

9,95€

ELECtriC kEttLE 1 Litre, Cordless

tOastEr 2 slice 6 heat settings

Custudio Puga, 9-a tOrrE DEL Mar tel: 95 254 03 92 Fax: 95 254 32 93

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Funny Thoughts Ponder on these...

Does killing time damage eternity?

If athletes get athlete's foot, do astronauts get mistletoe?

Have you ever seen a toad on a toadstool?

If Barbie's so popular, why do you have to buy all her friends?

How can you tell when it is time to tune your bagpipes?

If bees live in an apiary, do apes live in a beeiary?

How come chocolate milk doesn't come from brown cows?

Is it true that cannibals don't eat clowns because they taste funny?

How come I can pick my ears but not my nose?

Is that a flying saucer or a pie in the sky?

How dead is the Dead Sea?

Is the nose the scenter of the face?

How did a fool and his money get together?

Is this bulls*** or fertilizer?

How did the man who invented cottage cheese know he was done?

What do batteries run on?

How do they get a deer to cross at that yellow road sign?

What do penguins wear for play clothes?

If an orange is orange, why isn't a lime called a green, and a lemon called a yellow?

What do chickens think we taste like?

What do they call coffee breaks at the Lipton Tea Company?

all s r o F on i t p i r nses* c s e Pr me + le Fra

yo u C h o o s e! *Valid for monofocal 1.5 lenses and selected frames only. Available for all prescriptions which are technically viable.

Not to be used in conjunction with any other offer

Breast & Body Screening Medical Thermography Janet van Dam

618 989 125 w Non Invasive w Pain Free w Radiation Free w Reliable Centro Mar y salud, El Morche 952 532 065 617 913 196 tuesdays & thursdays 11.00 - 17.00

PREVENTION & EARLY DETECTION www.medical-thermography.org

Cafe - Bar

“Serving a selection of new dishes and of course, Fresh Fish! Attractive prices and with my special treatment”

Special Offer!

Delicious Lobster 500gr. - only 18€

C/Marquita 3, Paseo Puerta del Mar, Almuñecar Tel: 958 630 245 / 629 882 696 You can find us near the old Post Office, in front of the entrance to the underground car park. Closed Wednesdays

We welcome you to inspect, select & collect from our SHOWROOM at LAKE VIÑUELA In order to give clients individual attention please phone for an appointment before visiting. We are situated at KM29 (on right) off A356 1km past Camping & Pantano Restaurant.

We are signposted from there.

From bouncy chairs to buggies, stairgates to sterilisers.

Everything you need for when little ones come to visit.

PHONE DAWN ON: 627 931 360 WEBSITE: www.nurseryneeds.com EMAIL: dawn@nurseryneeds.com

kIELER JURGEN

RE ST SE U AU o A h RA k I B A R A NT E E R ST FET CA Specialities in Lamb, Spare Ribs & Steaks

New Fish Specials!!

Special of the Month Fresh white Asparagus with all dishes 30th April - “May Dance” with Elvis Home made food available for Take Away (vacuum packed on the premises)

Private functions catered for with Special Menus Open 9am - 11pm (closed Tuesdays) Nr. Centro International 72, Bajo, Algarrobo Costa (opp. large swimming pool)

Tel: 952 555 402

we offer garden design and general maintenance including:

Automatic Irrigation Systems, Drainage, Pest Control Garden and Pool Maintenance Pergolas, Printed Concrete

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Archez will press you to sample some, even taking you into their homes where you will be pressed to purchase honey, raisins, figs, almonds and of course the wine itself.

The jewel which is Árchez Archez is a small village which sits at the foot of the Tejeda and Almijar on the Sayalonga river, and we first discovered it during our route of Mudejar. Its perfectly-preserved 14th century red brick minaret of a former mosque can be seen from every point in the town, and was declared a historic monument of national character. It adjoins the parish church of Nuestra Señora de la Encarnacíon. The village fair, in honour of this church, takes place each year at the end of July or early August and lasts for three days. If you are hungry, a good place to dine is the Posada Mesón Mudéjar, where generous helpings of scrummy wellpriced food will make you think about booking into one of its five carefullydecorated guest rooms, so you can enjoy the wines without having to drive home.

The village is at an altitude of 530 metres, and lies 25 kilometres from the coast and 52 kilometres from Málaga. It is one of the smallest villages in the Axarquía with a population of about 425. Historically, grapes were its main crop and they are still an important part of its economy and landscape, as are figs and almonds. As with many Axarquía villages, homemade sweet wine is enjoyed by the locals who

If you are looking for love, the village legend says that if you touch the lizard stuck to the bell in the church tower, you will find love within the year! Apparently the poor lizard fell into the forge while the bell was being made, and has been a kind of Cupid ever since.

There are many different ways of driving to the village, depending on your starting point. If you are coming from the coast, then drive inland from Algarrobo, up past Sayalonga, turning left to Árchez on quite a sharp bend. The road then winds down to the river and there is a lovely restaurant on the bridge, overlooking a valley of orange trees. To enter the village, turn right before the bridge and straight over the new traffic lights. There is usually somewhere to park outside the town hall, and then you can walk along the narrow, winding streets and discover its hidden treasures.

From Vélez-Málaga, take the Arenas road; drive past Corumbela and Árchez will unfold in front of you, or you can turn up towards Canillas de Aceituno and drive past Sedella and Salares, or drop down from Canillas de Albaida.

Whichever way you decide to approach it, once there you will delight in the peace and serenity of this jewel of a village.

Property Of The Month AS2450 Benamargosa 110,000€ 110,000€

3 bedroom, 2 bathroom village house with roof terrace garden. This lovely property has been recently renovated and comprises living room with wood burner, fully fitted kitchen, bedroom 1 with fitted wardrobes, bedroom 2/study, shower room, inner patio, steps to roof terrace with garden and bedroom 3 with ensuite shower room.

The property has satellite television, internet and telephone. There is plenty of parking just outside the property which is walking distance to all amenities including 24 hour health clinic, banks, shops, bars, restaurants, village swimming pool and gardens.

wE haVE CLiENts LOOkiNg FOr PrOPErty tO BUy. iF yOU haVE a PrOPErty tO sELL CaLL saLLy ON 626 038 851 or 952 436 781

Email: sallyharrison@axarquiaproperties.com

sally harrison Owner / agent

AS2453 Los Romanes 799,000€ 7 bedroom, 7 bathroom villa with pool, garage, lake and sea views

AS2452 Algarrobo 850,000€ 3 bedroom, 2 bathroom with garage, pool, incredible views to the coast

AS2455 Alcaucín 485,000€ 3 bed, 3 bath villa with 2 bed, 2 bath guest cabin plus 2 pools on a 6,800m2 flat plot

AS2446 Trapiche 320,000€ 3 bedroom, 2 bathroom villa with pool, garage, sea and mountain views

AS2440 Trapiche 794,250€ 4 bed, 4 bath villa with 2,000 mango tree plantation providing good income

AS2432 Benajarafe 425,000€ 4 bedroom, 3 bathroom villa walking distance to the beach with sea views

www.axarquiaproperties.com

THE MOSQUITO SCREEN COMPANY

w w w

We have now been Screening the Costas and Inland for 9 years We manufacture all types of screens, any shape, any colour Magnetic - Aluminium Sliders Roller Screens - American Swing Doors and Patio/Balcony Enclosures ALUMINIUM - U.P.V.C WINDOWS, DOORS & CONSERVATORIES w w w

70mm U.P.V.C Internally Glazed 28mm Double Glazed Unit

w

Tilt and Turn System

w

Sliding Sash System

w

Fully Fitted by our own Craftsmen

Tel/Fax: 952 446 887 / 690 296 952

Email: the.mosquito.screen.company@gmail.com Or visit our website: www.mosquitoscreenco.com

To advertise call 664 210 468 or email sales@thesentinella.com

cs i P y

gn esi D C k. r NY ual ew Yo n n a N in 3 th e 1 tition !!! h t e ! ,' p stic ion om uct ild c anta r t C ns Bu 'Ca and

n n u F

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es l d i r t n Wor u o C he Of T i nd

, list -Z gion A re rld wo akes e L h t t nd rea ca. rou the G f Afri r ou in to 9 in ated tinen 2 c er lo con e m b tr y uru Nu coun in th B is a Population - 9,000,000 Language - Kirundi/French Located - East Africa Capital - Bujumbura Currency - Burundi Franc religion - Christian Main Exports - Coffee Literacy rate - 60% Life Expectancy - 50 years g.D.P. Per Capita - $400 total area - 27,834 km2 National sport - Football

Famous for - After Burundi gained independence from Belgium in 1962, the mountainous country enjoyed the distinction of being one of the first black republics in the world. interesting Facts - The African republic is completely encircled by Tanzania, Rwanda and the Democratic Republic of the Congo (formerly Zaire). It is about the size of Belgium.

In 1966, Burundi’s runner Venuste Niyongabo led his country to earn an Olympian title in the 5000 meters. For the first time in Olympic history, Burundi won a gold medal, making it not only the poorest country ever to win an Olympic title but also one of the 49 best Olympian teams at the XXVI Summer Games in Atlanta, Gerorgia, USA, ahead of Argentina, Taiwan, Mexico and India.

Coffee contributes more income to the country’s economy -- like neighbouring Rwanda -than any other single economic activity.

Bar Granada Free Wi Fi

Superb Front Line Views Sky Sports & ESPN Karaoke on Saturday Nights Draught Strongbow!!

Fish and Chips with Chip Shop curry sauce

PREMIERSHIP & ALL SPoRtS SHoWN oN A 50” SCREEN

Food Served Daily inc. All Day English Breakfasts & Vegetarian options

Friday night is curry night!

Curry, Rice & Drink - 6€ ~~~~~ Bonus Ball - 1€ entry - Winner takes all!!

tel: 651 444 872

www.athousehunter.com/bargranada/

Algarrobo Costa

(Closed thursdays)

Find us on facebook - Bar Granada

ight ng n i n e Op Friday il Apr 29th

MARDI GRAS

Festival of food is coming to town

Sam me n p l e FRE us E ta pas

We are cooking Spicy Mexican every weekend Dreamy Thai Friday and Saturday Rich & cheesy Italian evenings Ranchy American Are your taste buds bored?

The best of British Do they need stimulating? & Sunday from 2pm and even a bit of Well get over to Bar Plaza in Benamargosa and give We are at the EspaĂąol yourselves a real treat! original old town Mouthwatering We have a gorgeous array of Plaza, up the little recipes made from tantalising dishes from around road between the the freshest produce our wonderful world of local farmers and Tel: 638 489 711 for bookings church and local supermarket fishermen We look forward to seeing you!!!

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Almond Cake With Strawberries & Caramel Sauce

Further to the vegetarian recipe printed in last month's edition, it's possible that some of our readers may have assumed this was provided by the Home Cooking Company and that they only specialise in vegetarian food. We can confirm that while The Home Cooking Company do have vegetarian clients, they cook all types of food, including meats.

Ingredients (serves 12) Melted butter, to grease 130g (1 1/4 cups) almond meal 75g (1/2 cup) self-raising flour 200g butter, at room temperature 215g (1 cup) caster sugar 1/2 tsp vanilla essence 4 eggs 2 x 300ml ctns double cream 2 x 250g punnets strawberries, washed, hulled, sliced lengthways

metal spoon to fold the almond meal mixture into the egg mixture until well combined.

3. Spoon the mixture into the prepared pan and smooth the surface. Bake in oven for 55 minutes or until a skewer inserted into the centre of the cake comes out clean. Set aside in the pan for 10 minutes to cool before turning onto a wire rack to cool completely.

4. Meanwhile, to make the caramel sauce, combine the caramels and pouring cream in a small saucepan over medium heat. Stir until the caramels melt and the mixture is smooth.

Set aside to cool to room temperature.

For the Caramel sauce 12 soft caramels 80ml (1/3 cup) pouring cream Cooking Time 55 minutes Method 1. Preheat oven to 180째C. Brush a round 20cm (base measurement) cake pan with melted butter to lightly grease. Line the base and side with non-stick baking paper. Combine the almond meal and flour in a bowl.

2. Use an electric beater to beat the butter, sugar and vanilla in a large bowl until pale and creamy. Add the eggs, 1 at a time, beating well after each addition until combined. Use a large

5. Use a balloon whisk to lightly whisk the double cream in a medium bowl until the cream thickens slightly. Use a large serrated knife to cut the cake in half horizontally. Place the base of the cake, cut-side up, on a cake stand.

Spread half the double cream over the cake and top with half the strawberries. Repeat with the remaining cake, double cream and strawberries. Drizzle over the caramel sauce and serve immediately.

Yum yum...!

the home Cooking Co.

Don't go out - we'll come to you Fed up with restaurant food and prices?...the drive home? ...always feel rushed? why not let us prepare and serve you, your personal planned menu in the comfort of your own home. a fabulous evening or lunch to celebrate something special or just simply for the fun of it! if you are on holiday we are happy to provide our service.

tempted?

Phone now or e-mail for personal attention:

952 54 56 35

Richard or Camelia camelia@thehomecookingco.com www.thehomecookingco.com

BUFFET - Oriental food: Chinese, Japanese, Thai, etc...

Enjoy your food!

Make your salads with the quantity and ingredients you want.

Meat, fish, shellfish, vegetables, etc...

Choose your own conbination of flavours which you like the most and we will prepare your wok right away, in front of you.

Selection of sauces: Gon Bao; Tokyo; Thai; Sweet & Sour; Curry; Wok; Oyster; Peking.

You can help yourself to as much food as you want.

Our staff are on standby to attend to your needs.

Hours: 12:30-4:30 (Buffet price 10.25€) 7:30-12:00 (Buffet price 12.25€)

Children's Menu: Under 4's - 3€ 4-7 year olds - 6€

El Ingenio Shopping Centre, Food Court, Avenida Juan Carlos I, Velez Malaga

Call: 665 827 341

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Film iew ch Reving’s Spee eK Th

The King’s Speech is another UK film that depicts the queen’s father Albert, Duke of York (later, George VI, king of England) struggling with a speech impediment.

But, this film is as much about the former king as it is about his personal saviour, Lionel Logue (Rush). The story begins sometime in the late 1930s/early 1940s. George V isn't getting any younger and it doesn't escape him that despite the privilege royalty by birth accords him, he has duties to fulfil. Duties dictated by Parliament.

These duties and responsibilities must fall to his heirs after his passing. While Edward, the eldest, is the popular one, he's also something of a playboy, with his biggest indiscretion being

MECHANICAL DOCTORS MECHANICAL GARAGE

C/ de FraNsisCO de gOya 43 POL. iND. La PaNOLEta VELEz - MaLaga

tEL: 951 28 44 26 MOB: MiChaEL 671 758 375 mechanical_doctors@yahoo.co.uk

his alliance with Wallis Simpson, a US citizen and a twice-divorced woman. Image is everything and therefore, Ed must abdicate, leaving a reluctant Albert aka Bertie (Firth) to warm the vacant throne.

Albert would make a fine king. It's just that he's a stammerer. Not even a loving wife's (BonhamCarter) constant encouragement and perseverance can get the condition under control. All that changes when she finds Logue and the king's treatment begins and progress is noted. The already fragile relationship between the doctor (albeit, unqualified) and patient gets soured when Logue takes the liberty to point out that Bertie should aspire to be king, given his brother's disreputable leanings.

Of course, in time, duty beckons and speeches have to be made, so Logue is called back into service. This time around, Albert is king of England and the therapist has to be more discreet than ever. In due course, the king is able to let go of his fears and overcome them for the most part.

Star rating - ****/*****

REPAIRS TO ALL VEHICLES INCLUDING 4 X 4s & LIGHT COMMERCIALS -----qUICK SERVICE FOR OIL, BRAKES & CLUTCHES -----FULL DIAGNOSTIC CHECK - 40€ -----PRE ITV (MOT) AND PRESENT CAR FOR ITV -----COLLECTION & DELIVERY SERVICE AVAILABLE -----TYRE FITTING AND BALANCING -----RECONDITIONING OF ENGINES & GEARBOXES -----CAR & VAN HIRE -----VEHICLE TRANSPORTATION UK-SPAIN-UK

restaurantewcopas restaurante w copas

Opening Hours: Monday - Friday 9.00am - Midnight Saturday & Sunday 9.00am - 01.00am

FULL ENGLISH BREAKFASTS

Standard - Bacon, Sausage, Egg, Mushrooms, Toast with butter & marmalade, Juice or Tea/Coffee - 4.90€ Special - All the above plus Black pudding & Juice & Tea/Coffee - 6.90€

Breakfasts=Tapas =Menus =Lunches=Drinks =Ice Cream=Dinner

NON STOP KITCHEN For Information & Reservations:

952 965 286 Avda. del Faro 23, Edf. Los Angeles, Torre del Mar (opposite The Lighthouse)

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Heiko by Heiko How do I know if I have poor vision?

There are many signs which can point to vision loss. For example, even with your regular glasses, you may have difficulties: -Recognising the faces of friends and relatives?

-Doing things that require you to see well up close, such as reading, cooking, sewing or fixing things in and around the house?

-Picking out and matching the colour of your clothes?

-Doing things at work or home, because lights seem dimmer than they used to?

-Reading street and bus signs or names of stores?

Vision changes such as these could be the early warning signs of other eye problems.

Superb Menu of the day Only 8.45€ 1.30pm - 4pm new A la Carte Menu Gourmet Menu Choice or Meat/Fish Only 14.45€ evenings only 7.30pm - 10.30pm

Usually, the earlier your problem is diagnosed, the better the chance of successful treatment and keeping your remaining vision. how do i know when to get an eye examination?

Regular eye examinations should be part of your routine health care. However, if you believe your vision has recently changed, you should see your Optometrist/Optician/Eye doctor/eye care professional as soon as possible.

Ole Optica HEIKO BY HEIKO C/ Antonio Ferrándis 23 29780 Nerja Tel: 952 528 395 Avda. Andalucia 119 29740 Torre del Mar Tel: 952 967 923

Lobster night

Saturday 30th April from 19.30 40% off normal prices!!!

OnLy 21€ per person!!!!

Live Music with “FReD” if you don’t like lobster, you can have a superb Sirloin Steak . Just let us know beforehand Reserve your table now!!

Also available lunchtime on 30th (no live music)

For reservations please call: 952 965 424 or 662 086 854

Email: restaurantelsalmon@hotmail.com Avda. Andalucia 56, Torre del Mar

To advertise call 664 210 468 or email sales@thesentinella.com

87 105

Veggie Patch

Firstly on our right we now have a new neighbour, who we’ve nicknamed Grump as he never says hello or goodbye, plus he always looks utterly miserable. It’s a shame actually because that’s the area in which we used to throw all our weeds.

Now we have to throw them right to the other side as there’s no one using that patch at the moment. Tony ventured over one day and pulled up a few radishes and some mint leaves, which tasted quite yummy.

strawberries have already yielded some fruit.

The first time we noticed a red lush strawberry appear we picked it and promptly had a bite each between the three of us...yuuuum! Apart from the strawberries nothing else has grown adequately enough to pick yet, although we’re looking forward to the day…that’s if the caterpillars and other insects don’t chomp it all before we get to it - I’ve already noticed some holes in our broccoli leaves! After the recent bout of rain many weeds have sprouted, so on Sunday we’ll be pulling on our gardening gloves, taking our spades, and getting to work to dig them up.

Back to own veggie patch, we’ve now planted quite a number of different delights and the

Call back next month to see how our veggies are thriving...

So Kami and I have now owned our veggie patch for about one month and already we are having some fun (and a few not so fun) experiences.

At the local hairdressers, it soon became apparent that it wasn’t Mrs Garcia’s ‘air conditioner’ that was the problem

Esola Systems

Domestic and Commercial Air Conditioning (Heating and Cooling) Installations

Tel: 616 119 007 / 952 550 323

THE HAIR & BEAUTY STUDIO Cruce de Periana, Puente don Manuel (along from Morenos)

Beauty Treatments

Pedicures w Manicures w Collagen Facials w Hopi Ear Candles w Acrylic & Gel Nail Extensions w Teeth Whitening w Eyelash Perming w Aromatherapy Massage w Semi Permanent Makeup w Reiki w Waxing w Self Tan Treatment w Reflexology and Lots More!!

Qualified Sports & Remedial Therapist.

(BSC Hons; RSA)

Specialising in soft tissue massage and manipulation inc. treatments for sciatica, back problems, tension headaches, muscle injuries as well as relaxing & lymphatic massage.

Unisex Hairdressers

Our hairdressing team now consists of Emma, Karen, Danni & Carly.

We are now open 6 days a week Monday - Saturday and also late nights by appointment only. Please call in or contact the Salon for a FREE consultation with one of our highly qualified Stylists.

Advanced Cosmetic Procedures & Electrolysis For the treatment of Moles, Thread veins, Milia, Skin tags, Blood spots, Warts, Veruccas and Age spots FREE CONSULTATION

WANTED Fully qualified Hairdresser Full or Part time required to join our professional team Contact Sarah: 647 875 223 Gift Vouchers Available

For all enquiries please call: 693 740 575

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U

sele

ts c a ss F

ss sele ! u e ing y ar The t amaz u b

A selection of animal related facts, for all you mammal lovers out there…!

• You can tell if a skunk is about if you smell only .000 000 000 000 071 ounce of its spray.

• When a dolphin is sick or injured, its cries of distress summon immediate aid from other dolphins, who try to support it to the surface so that it can breathe.

• The Albatross has a wing span of up to 14 feet and only needs to land once every couple of years to breed. They can travel hundreds of thousands of miles each flight.

• Certain Chinese and American alligators can survive the winter by freezing their heads in ice,

leaving their nose out to breath for months on end.

• Sea Otters use so much energy that they need to eat as much as one-third of their weight each day.

• The biggest bird in the world is the ostrich, which can grow up to nine feet tall.

• According to hospital figures, dogs bite an average of 1 million Americans a year.

• The sailfish, the swordfish and the mako shark have all been clocked at swimming over 50mph.

• It takes around 10 dump-truck loads of wood to make a proper funeral pyre for a full-size elephant.

• Honeybees have hair on their eyes.

• The only continent without reptiles or snakes is Antarctica.

•The Dalmatian breed of dog originates from the Dalmatian Coast of Croatia.

Experienced, Professional & Reliable all year service. Pool Cleaning, Chemicals, Maintenance, Accessories or free advice.

We cover a large area from around Antequera down to the coast ~~ Let us look after your property for you or your guests.

Cleaning - Laundry - Changeovers Gardening - Key Holding - Security Checks Guest Relations - Direct Reporting & everything you need for TOTAL peace of mind for you, your guests & your valued property.

Contact Ron: 637 995 088 ppp247@hotmail.co.uk www.pppaxarquia.com

To advertise call 664 210 468 or email sales@thesentinella.com

91

Txt Msgs Text message abbreviations for you new sms senders amongst us…!

2DAY - today 2MORO - tomorrow 2NITE - to night AAM - as a matter of fact AB - ah bless!

ADctd2Luv - addicted to love AFAIC - as far as I know AKA - also known as ALIWanIsU - all I want is you ALOrO - all or nothing ATB - all the best B4 - before BaBitsU - baby it's you BBFN - bye bye for now BBSD - be back soon darling BCNU - be seeing you BdBy - bad boy BF - boy friend

BFN - bye for now BGWM - be gentle with me (please) BRB - be right back BTW - by the way BYKT - but you knew that Cld9? - cloud 9?

CMIIW - correct me if i'm wrong CSThnknAU - can't stop thinking about you CU - see you CUIMD - see you in my dreams CUL8R - see you later CYA - see ya D8 - date DLTBBB - don't let the bed bugs bit 4EVRYRS - for ever yours EOL - end of lecture F2T - free to talk FITB - fill in the blank FWIW - for what it's worth FYEO - for your eyes only FYI - for your information

NER

Nerja is renowned for its friendly, efficient local businesses, caring charities and all-round community spirit. It makes sense to support the best of the best, so why not check these out?

Visit OLas, the only dedicated sports lounge bar in Burriana. In April we have a special Mothers’ Day roast with surprise for mums on 3rd April. April 7th is Rat Pack night with Asa Murphy and a special curry menu; booking is advised. On April 10th Dean – along with a group of eight from the bar and APS Builders who arranged the event – will be walking up Mount el Cielo in aid of the donkey sanctuary. Sponsors are welcome and forms are in the bar. On April 16th we have race night after the first of the FA cup semi-finals. St George’s Day is April 23rd and we have a fun day on the beach and in the bar, with games for boys, girls, mums and dads. Also English sausages and pie and mash will be on the menu, along with other traditional food. April 29th is the Royal Wedding and afterwards we will be holding our monthly charity quiz, with all the normal rounds and one with questions on a Royal theme too. All the sport as it happens on Sky ESPN, Abu Dhabi and Premier Sports channels will be showing as usual at OLAS. If your car needs repairing, or you want to have it spray painted, visit Jonathan at artucolor for the best price and service. Artucolour is a general mechanics workshop offering car body repairs and body painting.

Visit ink and Chips on C/Perez. They have all that you need for your PC, such as ink cartridges and peripherals as well as laptop and printer sales. They also offer technical service 365 days a year.

RJA

Nerja theatre workshop - if you have children aged between four and 16, why not call Debbie where they now have places available? This is a fun way to learn dance and drama every Saturday from 11am - 1pm. Under New Management with new teachers.

Locked yourself out of your house or having lock problems? Call the 24 hour emergency locksmith, a fully-qualified UK C&G tradesman. Or, simply call to book an appointment.

Come and see Glenn and Carlos at the Big garage. With more than 40 years experience as mechanics, they speak English and Spanish and specialise in Land Rovers and 4 x 4s. They can also give your car a full service. They use genuine Bearmach Land Rover parts and accessories, and they're easy to find. As you head down from the motorway, turn right at the new Lidl exit, keep right and you’ll see them straight in front of you. They're open all day, Monday to Friday, from 9am to 5pm. rafters rastro – New 2 You Shop. We buy your unwanted household items: everything from lamps to clothing to mirrors and restaurant equipment. Call Alan or Wendy.

Dentadanes Dental Clinic offer top-quality Danish dental care at Spanish prices; a successful concept we have used since we were established in 1991. Open Monday - Friday 10am - 5pm.

If you would like to advertise your business in our Nerja section, prices are only 20€ for a box which includes 4/5 lines of editorial. Please mention The Sentinella when responding to adverts. To book space call 664 210 468 Nerja Theatre Workshop

Places now available!!

Dance & Drama

Every Saturday 10am - 1pm - From 4 yrs - 16 yrs Classes taught in English and all nationalities welcome Discouted rates for families with 2 or more children Established for over 9 years great way to meet new people - great fun

Under New Management - New Teachers Call Debbie: 600 27 51 00 / 952 52 96 88 Cultural Centre, Calle Granada, Nerja

The shown frames are from our new collection Discount not to be used in conjunction with any other offer We are making space for new models, so we have chosen 200 spectacle frames to sell at a price of 1â‚Ź each

Hearing Aids also available

The Sentinella sales@thesentinella.com Business Services Tel: 664 210 468

a5 FLyErs, siNgLE siDE

a5 FLyErs, DOUBLE siDED

A5 Flyers, Full colour, Glossy

A5 Flyers, Full colour, Glossy

500 1000 2000 5000

105€ 135€ 165€ 255€

BUsiNEss CarDs siNgLE siDE

100 500 1000 1500 2000

30€ 90€ 150€ 200€ 245€

500 1000 2000 5000

120€ 150€ 180€ 270€

BUsiNEss CarDs DOUBLE siDED

100 500 1000 1500 2000

45€ 135€ 225€ 300€ 375€

Design, Photography, Translations & Delivery all Inclusive Websites + Hosting & Domain name for 1 year - 460€

To advertise call 664 210 468 or email sales@thesentinella.com

97

Day For Life A fun, family day in aid of Cudeca Cancer Care Hospice - Sunday 15th May The day will commence with the annual 5km sponsored walk, for those who wish to participate – this year a different route around the village of Competa, finishing at the Alberdini Rural Hotel, Pago la Lomilla 85, Competa. The first sponsored walk started in 2006 with a small group of friends but has grown year on year with 52 walkers participating in 2010. The annual walk has to date, raised over 15,500€ for the Cudeca Cancer Care Hospice to enable them to continue providing the “Special kind of Caring” to advanced cancer sufferers and their families within the province of Malaga.

The Alberdini Hotel will then host the remainder of the day from 11am – 5pm, with lots of entertainment for both adults and children.

There will be two separate market areas, to include an open air general market in the lower

car park and then you will be able to indulge in the flavours of the world spectacular food hall above. Here you will be able to taste lots of different food varieties; Caribbean, Healthy Mediterranean, Spanish to name but a few. You will also be able to treat yourself to beautiful homemade cakes. There will be a separate children’s area complete with bouncy castle and face painting.

All this together with live music from Andy Time and Fabel. You will have the opportunity to participate in a super raffle for an incredible 500€ voucher made possible by the kindness of Jose, Portichuelo Centre to spend in the store on just what you want; TV, Washing machine, Garden furniture, the choice is yours.

This promises to be a fantastic day, so please come along and join us, there will be something for everyone and at the same time, support this worthwhile charity.

~Market and Car Boot Sale~

B O a r D i N g C at t E ry Canillas de aceituno

We offer safe, tranquil accomodation for your cat.

Our pens are safe and secure but with all the comforts of home, making it very cosy.

Only 20 mins from Torre del Mar, inland towards Vinuela, Campo Cats is a short 2 min drive from a main tarmac road which gives very good access.

We welcome inspection visits where we can discuss your cat’s personal needs.

(A 10% discount will be offered on your first booking) We only accept cats that are fully vaccinated.

Also, we can provide a collection & delivery service.

For further details, call Linda on: 665 510 735 www.campocats.com

Thursday 14th April then every 2nd Thursday of the month Hotel Arco del Sol on the A356 road at Colmenar Many different stalls including; Country Kitchen Cuisine (Annie’s delicious homemade pies, pastries and much more) English food products Why not come along and sample everything from an English bacon sandwich & coffee for 3€ to Spanish tapas or a superb menu Rooms full of superb quality ceramics for your house or garden

Only 5€ per stall or pitch For more information call: Annie on 625 914 427 or Chrissy on 617 811 030

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Ice Apparently this is a standard procedure all paramedics follow at the scene of an accident when they come across your cell phone.

We all carry our mobile phones with names & numbers stored in its memory but nobody, other than ourselves, knows which of these numbers belong to our closest family or friends.

If we were to be involved in an accident or were taken ill, the people attending us would have our mobile phone but wouldn't know who to call. Yes, there are hundreds of numbers stored but which one is the contact person in case of an emergency?

Hence this 'ICE' (In Case of Emergency) Campaign. The concept of 'ICE' is catching on quickly. It is a method of contact during emergency situations. As mobile phones are carried by the majority of the population, all you need to do is store the number of a contact person or persons who should be contacted during an

emergency under the name 'ICE' (In Case Of Emergency).

The idea was thought up by a paramedic who found that when he went to the scenes of accidents, there were always mobile phones with patients but they didn't know which number to call. He therefore thought that it would be a good idea if there was a nationally recognised name for this purpose. In an emergency situation, Emergency Service personnel and hospital Staff would be able to quickly contact the right person by simply dialing the number you have stored as 'ICE.' For more than one contact name simply enter ICE1, ICE2 and ICE3 etc. A great idea that will make a difference!

Spread the concept of ICE by storing an ICE number in your Mobile phones today! It really could save your life, or put a loved one's mind at rest.

ICE will speak for you when you are not able to.

Heather Gail Harman b.a hons

New enrolees welcome to join Heather's highly successful Drawing and Painting Classes.

Portrait days resuming in March Puente don Manuel - Mondays Torre del Mar - Thursdays Lake Vi単uela - Fridays

For further details contact Heather Tel: 952 115 366 Mob: 628 306 371

To advertise call 664 210 468 or email sales@thesentinella.com

99

Test Yourself

De Cotta - English Solicitors

You are driving down the road in your car on a wild, stormy night, when you pass by a bus stop and you see three people waiting for the bus:

Nerja Office Open Day - Wednesday 27th April - 11am – 2pm

1. An old lady who looks as if she is about to die 2. A very old friend who once saved your life.

3. The perfect partner you have been dreaming about.

Which one would you choose to offer a ride to, knowing that there could only be one passenger in your car? Think before you continue reading.

This is a moral/ethical dilemma that was once actually used as part of a job application.

You could pick up the old lady, because she is going to die, and thus you should save her first.

Or you could take the old friend because he once saved your life, and this would be the perfect chance to pay him back. However, you may never be able to find your perfect mate again.

See page 119 for answer

• FrEE legal consultations – ask any legal question you like! • FrEE Wills Pack – all you need to know about estate planning in Spain • FrEE Refreshments & wine – meet the our Nerja team. Charity raffle in aid of The Sisters of the Good Samaritan for the Nerja Residential Care Home for the Elderly.

The long established law firm De Cotta, McKenna & Santafé, with over 25 years of experience on the Coast, is opening its doors on Wednesday April 27th, for a charity Open Day, with free refreshments, tapas & wine, free consultations, a raffle and the opportunity to meet the team, ask your legal questions and more.

Drop in whenever you want to enjoy refreshments.

For a free consultation, please reserve your place by calling or emailing us now.

Tel: 952 527 014 Email: nerjaenquiries@decottalaw.net De Cotta McKenna & Santafé Calle Diputación, 6-2º-A, 29780 Nerja Málaga, www.decottalaw.com

Local, National and European Removals Airfreight Shipments and Overseas Removals Worldwide Reliable, swift and delicate handling of your personal belongings, either for your domestic or international removal or for storage purposes.

Salobrena Based - New Removals Store Open Now! Great Service, Fair Price

Tel: 685 360 193

www.arnoldremovals.es

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Artificial Grass The grass is always greener How would you like no more weeding, mowing the grass or trying to keep your grass green in this climate?

We have the answer! Casual Grass is the solution for everyone who is looking for a unique ground covering of superior quality. Would you like to have something different in your garden instead of real grass or pavement? Or decorate your roof garden or balcony? We have an alternative for you! Casual Grass is not just grass – but pure luxury for your garden.

not easily occur.

-Casual Grass is easy to install.

-It’s child-friendly and perfect to play on, and is extremely suitable as a surface eg: for playgrounds and inflatable swimming pools. You will never have any yellow stains on your lawn again.

-Casual Grass is long lasting and does not need watering, fertilising or weed killers.

- It can add value to your property when trying to sell.

-Casual Grass has been specially developed for the consumer.

Enjoy the luxury of your garden. There is no need to spray or fertilize Casual Grass. Are you going on holiday? There is no need for your neighbours to have to take care of Casual Grass. Your lawn will always have a beautiful colour in all weathers, season after season, year after year. Enjoy your garden – enjoy life.

Axarverde.com not only supplies and fits Casual Grass for your garden or balcony, but on a much larger scale with new builds, roundabouts and sports fields to name just a few locations. Axarverde staff do not need to install your new grass themselves, as there is the option of purchasing just the grass. They will be very happy to explain how to do it.

There are many advantages of Casual Grass: -It’s practical and doesn’t need maintenance.

-It’s suitable for shaded areas and moss will

Have a look on www.axarverde.com for more information, or visit us every Tuesday at Trapiche market.

No more mowing, watering or dead spots! Artificial grass is the solution for a unique ground covering.

Save money by installing yourself.

For more info or a free quotation

Call: 619 317 211

www.axarverde.com Do You. Care ?

Care working in the UK - Country Cousins is the UK’s leading private care specialist introduction agency, providing live-in care mainly for the elderly and infirm, enabling people to remain in their own homes for longer

Many Country Cousins live here in Spain returning to the UK frequently or every now and then for two weeks or more assignments.

If you are interested in earning between £945 - £1,200 for 15 days (one client) or £1,020 - £1,560 (two clients) by becoming a Country Cousin, please call Jennie or Barry for more information on: 625 807 504 or 952 115 305 (evenings)

To advertise call 664 210 468 or email sales@thesentinella.com

101

Deep Thoughts Someone needs to get a life!!

dard window.

1. It's a good idea to always carry two sacks of something when you walk around. That way, if anybody says, "Hey, can you give me a hand?" You can say, "Sorry, got these sacks."

6. When I found the skull in the woods, the first thing I did was call the police. But then I got curious about it. I picked it up, and started wondering who this person was, and why he had deer horns.

2. The face of a child can say it all, especially the mouth part of the face.

7. Broken promises don't upset me. I just think, why did they believe me?

3. If you go flying back through time and you see somebody else flying forward into the future, it's probably best to avoid eye contact.

4. I hope some animal never bores a hole in my head and lays its eggs in my brain, because later you might think you're having a good idea but it's just eggs hatching.

5. Instead of a trap door, what about a trap window? The guy looks out it, and if he leans too far, he falls out. Wait. I guess that's like a stan-

8. If you go to a costume party at your boss's house, wouldn't you think a good costume would be to dress up like the boss's wife?

Trust me, it's not.

9. For mad scientists who keep brains in jars, here's a tip: why not add a slice of lemon to each jar, for freshness?

10. If you ever catch on fire, try to avoid seeing yourself in the mirror, because I bet that's what REALLY throws you into a panic.

MANZ

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BEM idiomas ¿Hablas inglés?

As I write this today at 9.50am in Fuengirola, the temperature is already 18.5oC, it’s a glorious morning and hopefully, winter has now left us. Very soon the summer holidays will be here; in fact there are only 12 weeks of school left! Very soon the restaurants will be busy with tourists, the beaches will be filled and everyone will be remembering why they love Spain so much.

I will be making the most of my summer this year as my family and I are moving back down the coast. We will enjoy early evening trips to the beach and strolls along the promenade.

After living in a very British part of Spain for two years and not really having the opportunity to speak to Spanish people, I think that now the time has come for me to mix and liaise in Spanish conversation. I am actually quite looking forward to it, as I probably feel about 80% more confident now speaking in Spanish than I did one year ago.

One example of this was just yesterday at my daughter’s school. One of the mothers told me in Spanish that the meeting point for a school trip planned for Monday had been changed, and that the children should not meet at the

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school at 9am, but outside the local pharmacy at 8.45am. I was unsure if I had completely understood, so at home time, I told the mother of my daughter’s best friend, in Spanish of course! Although she knew nothing about it, she did understand all I had said. She checked with the teacher and lo and behold, I was right with every detail! I have to say I was very chuffed. Three years ago I would have just said ¿Hablas inglés?

I recommend Spanish lessons for anyone living in Spain, and BEM idiomas in Velez Malaga have helped me improve in leaps and bounds.

Call Viviane on 952 54 92 33

To advertise call 664 210 468 or email sales@thesentinella.com

103

April Fool!!!!! :)

Quiz For People That Know It All

April just wouldn’t be April without a fool !

See page 121

There are only nine questions. This is a quiz for people who know everything! These are not trick questions. They are straight questions with straight answers.

1. Name the one sport in which neither the spectators nor the participants know the score or the leader until the contest ends.

2. What famous North American landmark is constantly moving backward?

3. Of all vegetables, only two can live to produce on their own for several growing seasons. All other vegetables must be replanted every year. What are the only two perennial vegetables?

4. What fruit has its seeds on the outside?

Famous Last Words Classic last words.....

1) “I’ll get a world record for this.”

2) “The odds of that happening are a million to one.”

3) “What does this button do?”

4) “Are you sure the power is off.”

5) “I saw them do this on TV.” 6) “Don’t worry, it’s not loaded.”

7) “These are the good kind of mushrooms.”

5. In many liquor stores, you can buy pear brandy, with a real pear inside the bottle. The pear is whole and ripe, and the bottle is genuine; it hasn't been cut in any way. How did the pear get inside the bottle?

6. Only three words in standard English begin with the letters 'dw' and they are all common words. Name two of them.

7. There are 14 punctuation marks in English grammar. Can you name at least half of them?

8. Name the only vegetable or fruit that is never sold frozen, canned, processed, cooked, or in any other form except fresh.

9. Name 6 or more things that you can wear on your feet beginning with the letter 'S'.

See answers on page 119

$$$ Share´oscope $$$

8) “Rat poison only kills rats.”

It’s Share’oscope time again!

9) “I can do that with my eyes closed.”

Last month Mr Stockmarket bought Encore Oil shares at 122p. They have slipped back a tad, now on 110p.

This month he has chosen Solomon Gold, and he has purchased 3703 at 27p each. I wonder whether these shares will go up and down within one month?

You know where to find out!

10) “I’ve done this before.”

11) “Don’t be so superstitious.”

12) “Watch this.”

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Mind, Body & Spirit Cellular memory; we remember everything! how far back in your life can you remember? Take a moment to close your eyes and direct your mind back to childhood. What is the earliest event or experience you can clearly remember? Personally I can recall some isolated events from around the age of three or thereabouts – a sunny summer’s afternoon on the beach exploring rock-pools; a painful fall on my face; the death of a pet cat. Some of you may be able to remember even further back, though this is relatively rare. Quite commonly, people cannot reach back beyond five or six, and sometimes virtually the whole of childhood is a sealed book which cannot be opened. Yet whatever our conscious recall span might be, the truth is that we remember absolutely everything of significance which has happened to us from the beginning of our lives and even beyond. Beneath our brain-based memory circuits we have a cellular or organismic memory system which records and stores all experiences which have impacted us. It is not dependant on our sophisticated nervous system (though it is connected to it), nor is it controlled by the brain. It is part of our fundamental biology, and something we share with all life forms.

Even a plant can remember! In a seminal experiment to determine whether plants have emotion (recounted in the fascinating book The Secret Life of Plants), a common houseplant was connected via electrodes to a polygraph: a machine used in lie-detector tests which measure changes in electrical conductivity across the skin. (When we tell a lie we put ourselves under emotional stress which causes a change in the conductivity of the skin which is registered on a moving graph). The experimenter then attempted to “shock” the plant by taking

droplets of stagnant water which were teeming with microbiological life, and dropping them into a beaker of boiling water. Each time he did so, to his amazement, the plant registered a spike on the graph- it had “felt” the microbial annihilation and responded to it! Even more extraordinary events were to follow. The experiment over, the experimenter left the room, leaving the plant still connected up to the polygraph.

Sometime later he re-entered the lab to dismantle the apparatus whereupon the plant immediately produced another spike on the graph! It had no specialised nervous system and yet this common house plant not only registered the microbiological mass killing, but it also “remembered” the killer.

Recent advances in heart-transplant surgery have revealed fascinating glimpses of such cellular memories in human beings. In one documented case a female transplant recipient was given a heart from a donor who had been violently murdered. Not long after, she began to have disturbing nightmares and waking flashbacks of being attacked. The visions became more and more graphic until she realised that she was reliving the murder of the donor. Not only had their heart been transplanted, but the memories of its original owner’s death had been implanted as well!

Richard Waterborn is a professional healer. His work is based on the premise that all illnesses and mental/emotional conditions can be healed from within by identifying the root causes and releasing negative energy at a cellular level.

To book a session call: 676 346 402, email: rwaterborn@eircom.net or see his advert below:

To advertise call 664 210 468 or email sales@thesentinella.com

105

Funny Limericks We haven’t had limericks for a while, how about this little pile!

There once was a sculptor named Phideous Whose sculptures by most were thought hideous He carved Aphrodite Without even a nightie Which shocked all the fussy fastidious there was a young girl from rabat, who had triplets, Nat, Pat and tat; it was fun in the breeding, But hell in the feeding, when she found she had no tit for tat.

A macho young swimmer named Dwyer, Really liked playing with fire.

One night in the dark He swam with a shark, And his voice is now two octaves higher. 'tis a favourite project of mine, a new value of pi to assign. i would fix it at 3, For it's simpler, you see,

DAMP!

than 3 point 1 4 1 5 9 Linda Blair with great favour confessed, She'd been exorcised, thus finding rest, But alack and alas Her old demon came back and now the poor girl's repossessed. there once was a young boy named Nick who by chance was always being kicked he tried not to fight For he was smart, kind and bright so he learned how to run really quick.

There once was this guy named Stan Who had some trouble being a man He wore a dress and high heels And drove a Chevrolet with pink wheels And soon Stan became a tran a fellow jumped off a high wall and had a most terrible fall he went back to bed with a bump on his head that's why you don't jump off a wall.

DAMP!

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y r a i D

es h e t a D r T t´s on ?

Fo iWnhyaour area

Every Tuesday Country Farmers Market be tween 10am and 1.30pm. Los Jardines del Trapiche Call: Anita 627 877 164 Every Tuesday Bar Atila, Puente don Manuel, Quiz 8.30pm. Call: 685 552 529.

Every Tuesday Bar Triana Ctr. Bemamargosa, Triana. Quiz night 8.30p.m. Call: 618 373 316 Every Wednesday Modern Jive Dancing.

Restaurante Parquesol, Torrox Costa. 8.30pm.

Modern Jive dancing with tuition. Tel: Jacqueline 658 729 274 Every Thursday Evening Bar Viva, Torre del Mar, Quiz night from 8.30pm with cash prizes.

APARIV Charity Quiz last Friday of every

month. Call 952 544 362 Every Thursday Fonzies Paul´s Quiz with cash prizes. Cruce de Periana, Puente don Manuel 952 519 733 Every Friday Chiringuito Antonio Market, 10am - 2pm Puente don Manuel.

Special Charity Dance. "Dance in the old fashioned way"Trapiche Dine and Dance Group present an evening of old time and modern sequence dancing on Saturday 9th April at 7pm for 7.30pm at El Trapiche Restauranty only 10€. Supper included, all welcome. Programme suitable for beginners & intermediate.

Proceeds to buy aids & care for a huntingdon's sufferer. Tickets & info from Sheila on 651 546 578 or Joyce on 616 046 713 Email: kitrayl@hotmail.com / jjmunns@gmail.com Ladies Dinner Group - every Friday at La Vaqueria to enjoy an informal meal, good company and interesting conversation. Come and meet new friends from 7pm every week. 2 courses 5€. Contact details on main advert below.

To advertise call 664 210 468 or email sales@thesentinella.com

107

Dates For The Diary (Continued) CardioDance: Learn to Salsa, Cha Cha, Swing, Hustle. Dance Classes: Also includes Rumba, Sal Cha & Choreographed Routines Keep Fit Classes with or without weights.Your Heart, Your Life, Your Choice. Almeria-Estepona. Hugh Grant 606086300 hughgrant@tiscali.co.uk The Reel Jiggers Open Barn Dance at El Cruce Restaurante 8.30pm til 11.30pm. E-mail: chriscoates129@hotmail.com for dates.

Heather Gail Harmen’s drawing and painting classes. Puente don Manuel every MondayTorre del Mar every Thursdays and Lake Viñuela every Friday. Call 952 115 366 / 628 306 371 for details.

The "El Valle Asociacion" Based around the Lake Vinuela & surrounding areas. Meets on the first Tuesday of the month at 7.30pm at the Camping Bar on the side of Lake Vinuela (A356). The club organises events,trips and social functions. For further details and timings check the web site. www.el-valle.org.

DENtist Dr Bakri

*Dental Cosmetics *Implants Crowns & Bridges Algarrobo Costa Tel: 952 55 05 21

Torrox Costa Tel: 952 53 20 12

Emergencies: 678 974 892

English Dental Technician Over 20 years experience Fully Qualified Denture Repairs Adjustments / Duplications Based in Torrox Pueblo We can visit if needed Call Graham for confidential advice on any denture problem on: 952 539 219 / 622 719 640

Lux Mundi Fashion Show Wednesday 11th May 3-5pm. Entrance 5€ includes refreshment.

Tickets available at the desk. Avda. Moscatel 1 “I”(Antigua Casa de la Viña) Tel: 952 54 33 34 Email: luxmundi@lux-mundi.org Arts blogger Stefan van Drake of Canillas de Albaida (http://stefanvandrake.blogspot.com/) opens an exhibition of his acrylic and oil paintings, “Espana Rural” at Paco’s Gallery in Canillas on 26 April, running through end of May. This is his second exhibition. Van Drake took u ainting in Competa in 2005. He is largely selftaught. Currently showing: Oil paintings by internationally known Spanish artist Jaime Adan of Madrid and Mexico: “Glimpses of the Soul.”

La Vaqueria Curry Night Sat 2nd April 7pm. 4 courses of authentically prepared Indian food for just 8.50€ in a relaxed atmosphere. Arts & Crafts Class meets every Thursday 11am1pm. Professional tuition in all types of painting & crafts. Find us at the top of C/Arroyo Limon, Benamargosa. 952 517 273 studio.20lavaqueria@hotmail.com

TONY PHILLIPS

Van & trailers.

Light haulage, removals up to 25m3, car & boat transport.

Vinuela based, 25 years experience.

Local or anywhere in Europe.

Regular Spain-UK-Spain trips.

Phone 636 844 209 E-mail: hazeltony@live.co.uk

MR ‘wants CLUTTER your goods’ *House and Garage clearances *Shops and Bars - old stock * Now buying; Antiques, Gold & Jewellery Call David on: 686 375 089 or email a list to: cullimores@hotmail.com Cash available and efficient service

“SO DON’T BE A NUTTER,

SELL IT TO MR CLUTTER ”

MIXERS

TONY’S POKERS TOOL HIRE

All types of tools Chainsaw Sharpening Service

Alcaucin Based

Mini Digger For Hire For more details call:

693 505 272 693 286 625

WACKER PLATES

ACADEMIA GALA SpaniSh CourSeS intenSive & ConverSational all levelS available Including for children starting school C/ Maestro Duran Lopez 6 Torre del Mar

tel: 952 54 40 39

PET TAXI UK * FRANCE * SPAIN TRAvELLiNG iN AiR CONDiTiONED vEHiCLE DELivERED DOOR TO DOOR PETS STAy iN PET fRiENDLy HOTELS ACCOMPANiED TRAvEL AvAiLABLE TEL: (0044) 7533 285918

(0034) 667 235 205 email: pettaxitransport@hotmail.com

T H E D O G H O U S E While you are away on holiday or a weekend break, your dogs live in our house alongside our dog. *Large Enclosed Play Area *Lots of Country Walks *Pet Collection / Delivery Service *Vet Services - On Call *Gourmet Meals

‘oNLy

THE bEST FoR yoUR PaL’

Ring: Phil (mob) 649 079 321 Email: philipclayton_1@msn.com Comares / Benamargosa Ex - cat & dog airlines.uk Recommended

Refs Available

COLONiC irrigatiON A HEALTHY MOVE

Cleaning of the Colon A detox Enjoy: clearer skin, increased energy, weight loss, mental clarity and more...

Call Eileen: 951 167 238 or 609 811 879 (near Hotel Vinuela)

Carousel

Secondhand Furniture Shop

Open Mon - Fri 9.30am - 2pm Book exchange available on ground floor

“House Clearances” Call Gilly on: 630 211 907 La Vinuela Pueblo (Down steps at side of Bank)

MAN & VAN! Anytime...Anywhere

Locally based 12 cubic metres €25 per hour Small Loads to U.K Phone Mark: 669 255 968

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? n O s ’ t Wh a

sponsored by:

righTS ArkW The British Store & More OPEN ALL “OURS” Puente don Manuel Call: 952 519 780 www.arkwrights-groceries.com

Royal British Legion Torre del Mar April Events: We meet every Wed between 12-2pm at the La Vega Rest. next to Mercadona supermarket. All ages welcome-various activities held at the Weekly Meetings. 6th Weekly Meeting with Games Club, 7th Trip to Gibraltar 11€, 13th Weekly Meeting with Games Club, 20th Weekly Meeting with Games Club, 23rd St. Georges Day Dinner & Cabaret El Pino, Torrox Park 13€ mem 14€ non, 27th Weekly Meeting with Games Club. May 10th - 12th Trip to Cordoba & Patios Festival, 2 nights 140€ mem/150€ non-mem B&B, limited availability.

20th Almunecar Market & Lunch 12.50 inc mem, 13.50 non mem. Bookings 663 658 354 (9am-5pm), Welfare 628 343 198, Membership 617 997 095 rbl-tdm@hotmail.com Website at www.rbl-torredelmar.org.uk Lux Mundi Torre del Mar April Events: 5th Trip to El Chorro by Train, 8th Easter Bazaar, 11th Quiz Night 6:30pm, 18th-20th Centre only open in the mornings, 21st-24th Easter Church Services, 29th 5 Day trip tp Portugal. Every Mon, 3pm-5pm German speaking afternoon.

Every Tues, Music Appreciation Soc. Every Wed 3pm-5pm Art Group - 5:30 Choir Practice Every Fri 11am-1pm Coffee morning & Boutique, Every Sat 5pm Catholic Church service Every Sun 10:30am Anglican Service St. Barnabas. Deposits required for all trips & events.

For more information Tel: 952 543 334 Alcaucin Branch of TRBL meets every Thursday noon at the Bar Atila, Puente Don Manuel to enjoy social activities and meet new like minded friends. We regularly have a quiz, bingo, surprise events and presentations. Regular trips are arranged departing locally.

Branch Contact is 680491109. Harvey (please note this is a new number) Welfare Contact is 690 310 951 Dorothy, Social Contact is 636 203 135 Barbara

RBL - Los Romanes Branch We are still a branch of the Royal British Legion. We meet every Tuesday from 12.00 noon until 2.00 pm. at The Garden Restaurant, La Vinuela. On the first Tuesday of every month we have menu del dia at the restaurant. Please feel free to come and join us any time, you do not have to be a member. For social contact Lorraine on 952510203. For other contact Margaret on 951 167 600. Visit our web site on www.rbllosromanes.org.uk Come dancing for Cudeca. Next dance at Trapiche Restaurant on April 16th. 7pm for 7.30pm. 10€ to include fish, chicken, or vegetarian supper. Usual social dancing mix of ballroom, simple sequence ,old time and a couple of George's special Scottish Reels. Something for everyone even non- dancers. All money raised during the raffle will be donated to Cudeca. For reservations and meal choices, call Joyce on 616 046 713 or Mike on 952 510 189 or email Joyce on jjmunns@gmail.com Donations of raffle prizes very welcome.

Thanks to Maria of "MARICH" Language school Puente Don Manuel for donating a months free lessons at our last dance. Total collected so far for Cudeca's Hospice through raffles is 4,350€.

April 8th quiz night to raise money for APARIV Animal Protection Society with Prizes, Raffles and Food Available at Los Morenos Restaurant in Rincon de la Victoria 8pm. Call Stephen 952 514 671. Apr 20th at Sands & C in Torrox Costa at 7:30pm. Call 952 967 734.

Apr 29 at Bar Viva in Torre del Mar 8pm. Call Stephen 952 514 671 Lodge of European Fraternity No. 52. Meet in Maro every 3rd. Thursday during the winter months, and most Mon evenings for L.O.I. Tel for details 678043486 or 608750980 Acoustic Roots Events: Saturday April 9th: Bar y Restaurante Alberdini, Competa. Tel: 952 516294. Food Available. Friday April 15th: El Ancla de Cerilo, Peñoncilo Beach, Torrox Costa. Tel: 952 967103. Food Available. www.acoustic-roots.com

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111

What’s O n?

Dance Time - Spring is in the air and could be in your feet, so join us at El Trapiche Restaurant for our Special Easter Dinner and Dance Saturday 23rd April, 7.30pm to 11.30pm. Tickets 10.50€ Menu choice; Pork Chop, Chicken or Rosada. For reservations contact in English 952 550 497 in German 952 115 717 Lux Mundi Music Appreciation Group meets each Tues from 3.00pm until 5.00pm at the Lux Mundi Centre, Torre del Mar. The sessions are focused upon a composer or a period of classical music. We listen and enjoy a selection of the works. Call: Keith Hicks, 952 54 33 34 .

Lux Mundi Avda. Moscatel,1-"I" (Antigua Casa de la Viña) 29740-Torre del Mar Yo Jive Modern Jive Dance Classes have a great new venue in Torrox Costa. Every Tuesday 8.30pm. Modern Jive is easy, fun and a great way of meeting new people. |You dont need a partner come by yourself or bring a friend. Beginners always welcome. Join us Tuesday nights at El Ancla de Cirilo, Calle de Peñoncillo, Torrox Costa on the N-340 between Nerja and Torrox Costa. info@yojive.com Dancing is good exercise as well as good social fun! David would like to thank everyone for a great start to the season and welcomes members old and new to join him for lessons every Monday 5pm - 7pm at Trapiche Restaurant. Call David on 952 531 259 / 617 863 193 Nerja History Group meets on the first Friday of each month at the Cultural Centre, Calle Granada, Nerja at 11.30. For more information, contact Jill Christian-Smith on: 952 538 526 664 760 405 jill.christiansmith.gmail.com Pinguinitos Swim School Swimming lessons for all ages. Call Virginia Millington 952 533 236 or 662 463 452 vajmgo@yahoo.co.uk RBL - Benajarafe Branch Meet every Friday from 12.30-2.30pm, at the coastal, Puerto Niza restaurant, we enjoy bingo, quizzes, more entertainment and monthly outings, a superb lunch inc. drinks, and we welcome all new and existing RBL members. Call: 952 514 226 or 669 201 927

Trapiche Social Club meet every Wednesday from 12 noon - 2pm at El Trapiche Restaurant, Social Activities include card games, skittles, dominoes and occasionally free bingo. Everyone is welcome to join us members and visitors. April events: 6th Social Activities, 13th Social Activities, 14th Visit La Conception Gardens, 20th Social Activities and Monthly Lunch, 27th Social Activities. May Events, 26th Visit Antequera. For bookings visit El Trapiche Wed’s or call 680 764 130. For more information from the publicity office call Gordon Reith 951 239 366 or email gordonr@yahoo.co.uk Qi Gong and Tai Chi sessions continue to be held in the area. These gentle exercises work on the whole body and improve balance, health and general wellbeing and Paul Bradley can be contacted on 653 333 733 for further details.

Wednesday, 11am – Bar 02, Colmenar, Thursday, 3pm - El Duende, Los Ventorros, near Comares and Friday, 11am – Bar Trapiche, Trapiche, and another class in Rio Gordo at The Lemon Tree. Call Bradley on 653 333 733 Colmenar District Social Club meet on Wednesdays at the Arco de Sol in Colmenar from 12.30, all are welcome. We have quizzes quest speakers and regular trips and events.

Contact Marjorie on 951 163 071 Golfnutz meet every Wednesday at Santa Clara (Otura, Granada) for golf banter, all abilities welcome. Sense of humour essential. So if you need a change in 2011 then give us a call. Call 617 979 640 or caddy master on 858 702 800.

The Village Know-it-All, A free electronic newsletter. All the information you need to know about what’s happening from Cómpeta & inland to Canillas de Aceituno. Send & receive information on the following topics:- News from the Town Halls, Lost & Found (not only animals), Requests for information, Items for sale, Special events, Information from local groups, Births, marriages & deaths. Sign up for Village Know-it-All today! Just visit the blog site http://www.villageknowitall.blogspot.comvil lage.gossip@gmail.com

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n o i t a m r Info ...In our own random order!

Bus Times Call: 952 540 936 Nerja-Malaga 06:30, 07:30, 08:30 08:55, 10:10, 11:10, 12:25, 13:40, 14:55, 15:55, 17:10, 18:40, 19:40, 20:25 Malaga-Nerja 07:00, 08:15, 09:15, 10:30, 11:45, 12:30, 13:00, 14:00, 15:15; 17:30; 18:45, 20:15, 20:45, 21:30 Expect to pay approx 2.90€ one way and 5.15€ round trip Nerja-Nerja Caves 08:10, 08:25, 09:40, 10:40, 11:50; 11:55, 12:35, 13:10, 13:35, 14:25, 15:25; 16:40; 18:10, 18:55, 19:30, 20:10 Nerja Caves-Nerja 08:45, 10:00, 11:00, 12:00, 12:15, 12:50, 13:30, 14:45. 15:45, 17:00 17:45; 18:30; 19:30; 20:15 Expect to pay approx 0.80€ one way Nerja-torre see Nerja-Malaga times torre-Nerja 07:45, 09:00, 09:15, 10:00, 11:00, 11:15; 11:45, 12:30, 13:15, 14:45, 16:00, 17:30, 18:15, 19:30, 21:00, 22:00.

Church services in English services at inglesia de san Miquel (St, Michael's Church) every Sunday at 12 noon (except during May) and at Capilla de Nuestra Señora del Carmen (Fisherman's Chapel, Chinasol). There is a short service of Holy Communion Wednesday's at 9.30am in the Church Shop, Calle Malaga, Nerja. Details of how to find the churches are also available in the Church Shop. Priest in Charge: Father Geoff Johnston Tel: Church House 952 521 339 Church Shop 952 522 460.

Competa - Holy Communion every Sunday at 5.30pm in the Parish Church, Plaza Almijara, Cómpeta Tel: 952 219 396 Malaga - St. George´s Church in the Engish Cemetery. 11.00am Sundays Tel: 952 219 396 torre del Mar - Torre Del Mar - Sanysol Residencia, Sundays 10.30am. Tel 952 219 396 anglican communion.

Local Police : 091 guardia : 062 Fire : 080 torre del Mar - Services in English - St. Barnabas IERE (Anglican). Holy Communion 11am.

2nd and 4th Sundays. Morning Prayer 1st and 3rd Sundays. 6pm. All at Lux Mundi Centre, Avda Moscatel 1 - "I", two minutes walk from the bus station. Tel: 952-030-461 (Priest) or 952 510 056 (Churchwarden). roman Catholic - torre del Mar - Lux Mundi Ecumenical Centre, Saturdays 5pm, (Winter), Saturdays 6pm, (Summer) Evangelical - torre del Mar Evangelical (Presbyterian Church) meets every Sunday for Worship in English at 11.30am in the Picasso Room, Hotel Torremar, (off Paseo Larios) C/ Saladero Viejo 15 Torre del Mar. All welcome.

Minister J. Hartsmith Foy. Tel: 952 532 825 or: www.torredelmarchurch.org torrox Park Community Church meet at 11am on Thursday for coffee and discussion on current topics. This is an informal meeting for everyone to join in. At Tapricho Tapas bar (opposite El Pino camping), Torrox park. more info: Minister J. hartsmith foy, Tel: 952 532 825 or www.torroxparkchurch.org.

Puente don Manuel - Fellowship of the King, Sunday Worship - 11am. Wednesday Fellowship - fortnightly 7pm. Midweek activities - Pilates - Tues midday-1pm, Bridge club tues 2.15-6pm, Art group Thurs 3-5pm, Charity shop/books Fri 10-2pm, Camera club 1st Fri of month 2.30-5pm. We meet at Fellowship of the King premises situated underneath Maroma Inmobiliaria, El Cruce de Puente don Manuel.

Phone 952 115 220 or 952 518 185 Bank hours Usually 8:30am-2pm except Sundays, Bank holidays and Fiestas. Please note, the majority of banks will not accept bills to be paid (ie: electric, phone, rates) after 11am. taxis torre: 952 540 016, Nerja: 952 520 537 Velez Malaga: 952 540 016, Puente Don Manuel: 952 510 992 Mob: 616 034 636.

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ambulance : 061 water : 952 540 662 Electricity : 952 540 662 tourist information Nerja: 952 521 531 torre del Mar: 952 541 104 weekly Market days Mondays: Torrox Costa tuesdays: Nerja & Country Farmers Market, at Jardines del Trapiche on the road to Benamagosa. wednesdays; Rincon de la Victoria & Algarrobo Costa thursdays: Velez Malaga & Torre del Mar & Frigilana Fridays: Puente don Manuel & Cala de Moral saturdays: Caleta de Velez & Competa sundays: Malaga Consulates Uk Opposite the main bus station Edif, Eurocom Bloque Sur C/Mauricio Moro 2-2º- Malaga 952 352 300 ireland Avda, de los Boliches, Nº15 Fuengirola 952 475 108 Netherlands/Dutch Avda, Carlota Alesandria, 33 Edif. San Andres - 1º-7 Torremolinos 952 380 888 germany C/Mauricio Moro 2, Malaga 952 363 591 sweden 952 604 383 France 952 226 590 / 952 214 888 Belgium 952 559 159 Denmark 952 211 797 Luxembourg 952 857 197 telefonica Dial 1002 to report a fault on the line. For general enquiries dial 1004

Informa

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tion

airports Malaga 24-hour information 952 048 484 or 952 048 804 granada 952 048 804 airlines www.easyjet.com www.ryanair.com www.thompsonfly.com www.flymonarch.com www.flybe.com www.bmibaby.com shops 10am - 2pm - 5pm - 8:30pm (generally) The municipal market (fruit and veg) and the weekly markets are only open mornings. water supplies Velez Malaga: 952 506 450 Nerja: 952 520 154 Malaga: 952 135 013 railway stations Malaga: 952 360 202 granada: 958 271 272 town halls torre and Velez: 952 500 100 torrox: 952 538 200 Nerja: 952 548 400 Competa: 952 516 006 rincon: 952 402 300 Malaga: 952 135 000 hospitals Nerja ambulatorio: 952 523 131 Velez Malaga: 951 067 000 itV Call: 902 575 757 or 952 551 084 www.itvcita.com - Open Mon - Fri 08.00am 18.45pm, Sat: 08:00am - 12.45pm

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) : a h a h s e k o J An old Italian lived alone in New Jersey. He wanted to plant his annual tomato garden, but it was very difficult work, as the ground was hard. His only son, Vincent, who used to help him, was in prison. The old man wrote a letter to his son and described his predicament: Dear Vincent, I am feeling pretty sad, because it looks like I won't be able to plant my tomato garden this year. I'm just getting too old to be digging up a garden plot. I know if you were here my troubles would be over.. I know you would be happy to dig the plot for me, like in the old days.

Love, Papa A few days later he received a letter from his son.

Dear Pop, Don't dig up that garden. That's where the bodies are buried.

Love, Vinnie At 4 a.m. the next morning, FBI agents and local police arrived and dug up the entire area without finding any bodies. They apologised to the old man and left.

That same day the old man received another letter from his son.

Dear Pop, Go ahead and plant the tomatoes now. That's the best I could do under the circumstances.

Love you, Vinnie ------------------------------------------------------------Two old men decide they are close to their last days and decide to have a last night on the town. After a few drinks, they end up at the local brothel. The madam takes one look at the two old geezers and whispers to her Manager, ''Go up to the first two bedrooms and put an inflated doll in each bed, these two are so old

and drunk, I'm not wasting two of my girls on them, they won't know the difference.!.''

The manager does as he is told and the two old men go upstairs and take care of their business.

As they are walking home the first man says, “You know, I think my girl was dead!”

“Dead?” says his friend, “Why do you say that?” ''Well, she never moved or made a sound all the time I was loving her.''

His friend says, “Could be worse I think mine was a witch.”

“Witch??. . Why the hell would you say that?”

“Well, I was making love to her, kissing her on the neck, and I gave her a little bite, then she farted and flew out the window...... took my teeth with her!”

------------------------------------------------------------After having dug to a depth of 10 feet last year, Australian scientists found traces of copper wire dating back 200 years and came to the conclusion that their ancestors already had a telephone network more than 150 years ago.

Not to be outdone by the Aussies, in the weeks that followed, an American archaeologist dug to a depth of 20 feet and, shortly after, a story was published in the New York Times: "Americanarchaeologists, finding traces of 250-yearold copper wire, have concluded that their ancestors already had an advanced high-tech communications network 50 years earlier than the Australians".

One week later, the Council in Essex, reported the following: "After digging as deep as 30 feet in Colchester, Jack Lucknow, a self-taught archaeologist, reported that he found absolutely f*** all. Jack has therefore concluded that 250 years ago, Britain had already gone wireless."

Just makes you bloody proud to be British.

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115

Jokes h a h a :) Miss Beatrice, the church organist, was in her eighties and had never been married. She was admired for her sweetness and kindness.

One afternoon, the pastor came to call on her and she showed him into her quaint sitting room. She invited him to have a seat while she prepared tea. As he sat facing her old Hammond organ, the young minister noticed a cute glass bowl sitting on top of it. The bowl was filled with water and in the water floated, of all things, a condom!

When she returned with tea and scones, they began to chat. The pastor tried to stifle his curiousness about the bowl of water and its strange floater, but soon it got the better of him and he could no longer resist.

'Miss Beatrice', he said, 'I wonder if you would tell me about this?' pointing to the bowl.

'Oh, yes,' she replied, 'Isn't it wonderful? I was walking through the park a few months ago and I found this little package on the ground.

The directions said to place it on the organ, keep it wet, and that it would prevent the spread of disease. Do you know I haven't had the flu all winter!’

------------------------------------------------------------Two old guys, one 70 one 77, were sitting on their usual park bench one morning.. The 77 year old had just finished his morning jog and wasn't even short of breath. The 70 year old was amazed at his friend's stamina and asked him what he did to have so much energy.

The 77 year old said, "Well, I eat rye bread every day. It keeps your energy level high and you'll have great stamina with the ladies."

So, on the way home, the 70 year old stops at the bakery. As he was looking around, the lady asked if he needed any help.

He said "Do you have any Rye bread?"

She said, "Yes, there's a whole shelf of it.

Would you like some?"

He said, "I want 5 loaves."

She said, "My goodness, 5 loaves ... By the time you get to the 3rd loaf, it'll be hard."

He replied, "I can't believe it, everybody knows about this but me.”

-------------------------------------------------------------

**Rrriiiiinnnnggg, rrriiiinnnngg,** 'Hello?'

'Hi honey. This is Daddy. Is Mummy near the phone?'

'No, Daddy. She's upstairs in the bedroom with Uncle Jack.'

After a brief pause, Daddy says, 'But honey, you haven't got an Uncle Jack.'

'Oh yes I do, and he's upstairs in the room with Mummy, Right now.'

Brief Pause. 'Uh, okay then, this is what I want you to do. Put the phone down on the table, run upstairs and knock on the bedroom door and shout to Mummy that Daddy's car just pulled into the driveway.'

'Okay, Daddy, Just a minute.'

A few minutes later the little girl comes back to the phone. 'I did it, Daddy.'

'And what happened, honey?'

'Well, Mummy got all scared, jumped out of bed with no clothes on and ran around screaming. Then she tripped over the rug, hit her head on the dresser and now she isn't moving at all!'

'Oh my God!!! What about your Uncle Jack?'

'He jumped out of the bed with no clothes on, too. He was all scared and he jumped out of the back window and into the swimming pool.

But I guess he didn't know that you took out the water last week to clean it. He hit the bottom of the pool and I think he's dead.' *****Long Pause***** Then Daddy says, 'Swimming pool? ...........Is this 04188 33503?'

‘No, I think you have the wrong number!’

------------------------------------------------------------A professor at the University of Sydney was giving a lecture on 'Involuntary Muscular Contractions' to his first year medical students. Realising this was not the most riveting subject, the professor decided to lighten the mood slightly.

He pointed to a young woman in the front row and said, 'Do you know what your arsehole is doing while you're having an orgasm?' .

She replied, 'Probably fishing with his mates.'

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s e g a P Puzzle Get Quizical

Hey Diddle Riddle

1. What is a fife?

2. In medicine what is a parulis?

3. What is ponerology the doctrine of?

4. What does sericeous mean?

5. What are the Theological virtues?

6. What is Viyella made from?

7. What shape is a godet?

8. What is God's acre?

9. Where is the Holy City?

10. What colour is mazarine?

11. What is the Quaker-bird aka?

12. What was a squeeze box?

1) A man was at a bar feeling poor he sees a rich man take 50's out his pocket to pay the cashier. The poor man says to the rich man "I know all the songs known to man." The rich man laughed and said,"I bet you all the money in my pocket that you can't sing a song with my daughter's name in it, Sarah Lee Greyson." The poor man went home rich and the rich man went home poor. What song did the man sing?

2) I have seas without water I have forests without wood I have deserts without sand I have houses with no brick What am I?

3) A man wanted to enter an exclusive club but did not know the password that was required.

He waited by the door and listened. A club member knocked on the door and the doorman said "twelve." The member replied "six" and was let in. A second member came to the door and the doorman said "six." The member replied "three" and was let in. The man thought he had heard enough and walked up to the door. The doorman said "ten" and the man replied "five." but he was not let in. What should have he said?

Answers on page 119

Sudokus Easy

Tough

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117

Puzzle P ages

Crossword Two sets of clues but the same answer across

Cryptic Clues

1 Where bulls and bears and cattle sold? [5,6] (11) 9 We hear star is a male child (3) 10 Liqueur sorted out a neurotic (9) 11 They're all characters! (8) 12 One form of trust (4) 14 Aurally compare with crusty growth (6) 16 Hear cook grating (6) 18 Of sound mind on Parisian river, it's said (4) 19 Restrain by force about two thousand in trade (8) 22 Wrong exchange for euro, seĂąor (9) 23 Fetch a bit of luggage, travelling (3) 24 Painful thing, having tripped over circular plate [7,4] (11)

Down 2 Weight lifted at 100 mph [3-2] (5) 3 Flower with shortened phase – so be it (8) 4 Chaps come round to help young woman (6) 5 Ceremony is correct, we hear (4) 6 English learnt about becoming immortal (7) 7 Set up table, dishes placed (11) 8 Retribution disturbs St Jude's rest [4,7] (11) 13 Professional reportedly shot off-target, and swore (8) 15 American money artist left at the core (7) 17 Gloomy doctor got to his feet (6) 20 Is furious when egghead appears in tatters (5) 21 Break child's game (4)

across

Quick Clues

1 Commodities exchange [5,6] (11) 9 Male child (3) 10 Orange liqueur (9) 11 System of letters (8) 12 Army group (4) 14 Moss-like plant (6) 16 Grating (6)

18 Of sound mind (4) 19 Business, trade (8) 22 Mistaken (9) 23 Fetch (3) 24 Painful back condition [7,4] (11)

Down 2 100 mph on a motorbike [3-2] (5) 3 Colourful pot plant (8) 4 Damsel (6) 5 Ceremony (4) 6 Without end (7) 7 Set up (11) 8 Suitable punishment [4,7] (11) 13 Assured (8) 15 At the core (7) 17 Gloomy (6) 20 Is furious (5) 21 Break (4)

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s n g i S r Sta Capricorn – You are feeling like one clever cookie this month – you come complete with choc chips, nuts and all, so make the most of the surge.

Lucky sign – A cuppa

Cancer – Don’t take any rubbish which erupts from the mouth of authority figures this month, as their advice could leave you worse off. Just tell them all to stuff it and figure things out your own way.

Lucky sign – Green Y-Fronts

Aquarius – Just who the hell do you think you are? You flaunt around making out you are someone special, but let’s face it, you really ‘aint.

Lucky sign – A paper bag (worn over head for maximum effect)

Leo – A visit to the doctors may be needed when you experience pain in an unusual place.

But don’t worry, it’s nothing serious. A few days of medicine and you’ll be back to normal.

Lucky sign – A Feather Duvet

Pisces – Shakirurta me a puira loide burth nightrefswan. Yes, you will have a period of talking complete gibberish throughout April. Oh dear!

Lucky sign – A translator

Virgo – Mr Postman will bring you a nice surprise for entirely no reason on a totally random day. Don’t be alarmed. Take, smile, open, then laugh. Well, that was the intention all along.

Lucky sign – Cellophane

Aries – Star gazing is not something you have been hugely enthralled about in the past, but now you experience a love for it. Perhaps with someone special even. You romantic, you!

Lucky sign – Binoculars (heart shaped)

Libra – Come on baby light my fire, and while you’re there light all the candles and also the stand up lamp in the hall.

Lucky sign – Bulbs

Taurus – You Taureans may well be known as the ‘homely types,’ but that doesn’t have to mean being a hermit. I mean, it is healthy to venture out and about at intervals. That way you actually get to wear shoes.

Lucky sign – A day in the park Gemini – Your life is about to change direction in some rather large manner. Maybe a relationship break up, or perhaps a house move, or you might even decide to leave your high flier executive position to become a full time stamp collector.

Lucky sign – A golden key

Scorpio – Gee whiz, you are riding life as if it were a galloping horse. Take those reins and stay with it dude!

Lucky sign – Pineapple rings (canned in their juice) Sagittarius – Religiously speaking you don’t believe in too much, but sometimes it is important for peace of mind and peace of soul. So just pretend you know what life is all about, like everyone else.

Lucky sign – A bleating kid (animal variety) And if it’s your Birthday this month enjoy lot’s of eggs, the chocolate variety!

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To advertise call 664 210 468 or email sales@thesentinella.com The Top Ten most searched for flight destinations in 2010 from the UK on www.skyscanner.net 1. Malaga (Spain) 2. Tenerife (Spain)

10,9

Top Tens ,8, 7,6 ,5,4

3. Alicante (Spain) 4. Orlando (USA) 5. Dalaman (Turkey)

,3,2 , 1,

3. Siemens Group - Germany 461,000 4. McDonalds - US 447,000

6. Faro (Portugal) 7. New York (USA) 8. Palma (Spain)

5. Carrefour - France 440,479 6. Compass Group - UK 410,074

9. Lanzarote (Spain) 10. Geneva (Switzerland)

7. United Parcel Service - US 407,000

The Top Ten companies with the most employees...

8. Gazprom - Russia 396,571

1. Wal-Mart Stores - US 1,800.000

9. Daimler Chrysler - Germany 382, 724

2. Deutsche Post - Germany 502,545

10. Hitachi - Japan 355, 879

get Quizical answers 1. Small flute, 2. Gumboil, 3. Wickedness, 4. Silky, 5. Faith, Hope & Charity, 6. Cotton & wool, 7. Triangular, 8. Burial ground, 9. Jerusalem, 10. Rich blue, 11. Sooty albatross, 12. Accordian. riddle Diddle answers 1. Happy Birthday!, 2. I am a map!, 3. Three. The doorman lets in those who answer with the number of letters in the word the doorman says. test yourself answer YOU WON'T BELIEVE THIS........ The candidate who was hired (out of 200 applicants) had no trouble coming up with his answer. He simply answered: 'I would give the car keys to my old friend and let him take the lady to the hospital. I would stay behind and wait for the bus with the partner of my dreams. Sometimes, we gain more if we are able to give up our stubborn thought limitations.

Never forget to 'Think Outside of the Box.' HOWEVER...., The correct answer is to run the old lady over and put her out of her misery, have sex with the perfect partner on the bonnet of the car, then drive off with the old friend for a few beers.

I just love happy endings!

Quiz For People that know it all! 1. Boxing, 2. Niagara Falls, (The rim is worn down about two and a half feet each year because of the millions of gallons of water that rush over it every minute), 3. Asparagus and rhubarb, 4. Strawberry, 5. It grew inside the bottle. The bottles are placed over pear buds when they are small, and are wired in place on the tree. The bottle is left in place for the entire growing season. When the pears are ripe, they are snipped off at the stems. 6. Dwarf, dwell and dwindle, 7. Period, comma, colon, semicolon, dash, hyphen, apostrophe, question mark, exclamation point, quotation mark, brackets, parenthesis, braces, and ellipses, 8. Lettuce, 9. Shoes, socks, sandals, sneakers, slippers, skis, skates, snowshoes, stockings, stilts

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r e d a r The T E

oto. t inc. ph r e v d a boxed 8 nth.

15€ for 7th of the mocall: 664 210 46 r o s d r 1 o r e w o th 8 th before e mon um of 2 maxim nt to be made efore 15th of th a r fo 3€ Payme tinella.com b n s@these mail sale

Cars For Sale / Wanted kawasaki stX 900 JEtski 3 seater, comes with trailer, board, dohnut, skis, anchor, fuel cans & sand wheels for trailer. Unused for some time. Low hours, no damage

1,500€ Full details 651 760 845

NissaN tErraNO ii 2000, RHD, Spanish plates, 100K, ITV, 4 new tyres, Well maintained.

Good strong reliable 4x4 with no problems. Honest dents & scratches, trials & inspections welcome 3,800€

Full details 651 760 845

sUzUki Drz 400 ENDUrO 2006 with only 1,000 miles. As new, first service on time only, UK reg, All papers in order

2,500€ Full details 651 760 845 BMw F650 gs MOtOrCyCLE enduro 2005.

19,000 km, cond as new. Saudi Arabian plates.

Recent €1100 service inc. new tyres, battery etc. Must be seen. Bargain €2500 no offers. Tel: 660 123 349 aUDi CaBriOLEt 2.6 1999. RHD, UK plates.

Drives superbly. Bargain €2200 Tel: 660 123 349 CaraVaN aVENtO 445 TL Lux. 2/3 berth.

1984. Full awning. Bike rack. Complete Dutch paperwork. Exc tyres. Very good cond throughout. €2500 Tel: 660 708 441 waNtED CLassiC MOtOrCyCLEs. Pre 1985, any condition, any plate, working or not.

Cash paid. Tel. 615 855 479 -------------------------------------------------------------waNtED: hairDrEssErs - Chair for rent within a busy Almunecar town centre salon.

Also small private treatment room available for hourly or flexible rental terms, would suit therapist, chiropodist, beautician, masseuse or nail technician. Call 958882106 / 627616544

Properties For Sale/Rent

tOrrEViEJa (ViLLa MartiN), 1 Bed apartment for sale. Sleeps 4, new UPVC windows with kitchen appliances on nice complex with pools. Sold as seen, £55,000 O.N.O. Call Mick on 0044 7770972725 email: thermawarm@aol.com or call Carmen 662 378 911 or email carmen.cienfuegos@hotmail.com for more information. www.holidayrentalinspain.com FOr rENt iN riOgOrDO Charming townhouse, 3 bed, fully furnished, kitchen/diner, lounge with log burner, Sat TV, telephone, terrace, parking, 2 mins to centre. €350 pcm Tell 606 734 012 tOwNhOUsE FOr saLE Charming townhouse in Riogordo. 3 bed, lounge with log burner, fitted kitchen/diner, terrace, parking. Reduced to €119,000. Tel 606 734 012 tOrrOX PUEBLO LargE tOwNhOUsE 150sqm and terrace. In need of rebuild with plans. Paperwork in order. Call: 95 252 5830 / 609 931 224 30,000€ o.n.o.

2 BED aPartMENt - distressed sale, Mijas Pueblo, €84,000, sea views and a balcony. Tel: 649 369 009 FLat, 90M2, in Vélez-Málaga, new, 5 mins to schools, health centre, supermarket, bus station, highway and 5 km to the sea. 3 bedrooms, a prime quality furnished kitchen, 22m2 terrace, lift and garage. €159.000, tlf: 606 764 539.

Ready to move in.

ViLLa FOr rENt triaNa, Velez Malaga.

Own pool, 3 bedrooms, sleeps 6, A/C, new kitchen, Sat TV. Long term rental avail. Contact Lisa on 07884448671 email cranfieldlisa@hotmail.com izNatE. One-bedroomed house for RENT. Large terrace, large sitting-room, kitchen/diner 20 mins beach. Airport 40 mins. 225€/month long-term. Call: 634 498 179 FOr saLE! Large fully stocked gift & souvenir shop in Mijas Pueblo, a tourist attraction located 10 mins from Fuengirola, a beautiful white washed mountain village 15mins from beach.

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121

3€ for a maximu m of 28 Pay wo Email: s ales@th ment to be ma rds or 15€ for esentine d e lla.com e before the 17nquire about b before 1 o 5th of thth of the month xed adverts e month . or call: 6 64 210 4 68

Properti es

Properties For Sale/Rent Shop includes all fixtures, fittings, a list of suppliers & stock at purchase price of approx.

28,000€ to 35.000€ with a retail value of approximately 70.000€. A profitable business.

Rent €1,000pm. Option of buying without stock for €15,000 (includes fixtures and fittings) With stock €49,950 Selling due to family reasons.

NErJa stUDiO L/T let, newly renovated, community swimming pool, parking, Sat T.V, 2 mins beach/town centre 300p/m 635 119 078 aPartMENt FOr saLE - El Morche! This 1bed 1-bath apartment is situated just two minutes away from the beautiful sandy beach of El Morche. It has a separate kitchen, balcony, marble floors, communal swimming pool and it comes fully furnished. It's an ideal starter home or holiday home. Price: €115,000 - for more info or to arrange a viewing call 610 976 284.

FOr saLE 1 BED beautifully finished apartment in Mijas Pueblo with idyllic private garden (very rare in Mijas Pueblo). Comes with brand new trendy furniture and electric appliances.

Proven excellent rental potential, along with further rentals for this year, located just off Calle San Sebastian in an excellent position 5 mins away from all shops and restaurants, buses etc... €139,950 Tel: 649 369 009

Items For Sale sOLiD wOOD DiNiNg taBLE (4/6 seater), with extending leaf, plus 6 matching dining chairs also wood with upholstered seats. 2 X Light wOOD FrEE standing tall book shelf units with 2 matching wall shelves & ornate

brackets. sOLiD wOOD, BEECh effect interior (standard size) double doors, half wood and half beveled edged glass panes. All extremely good quality. Make us a sensible offer for all or any of the items. Salobrena area. Contact. 617 738 849 or 958 612 185. Email: rowley.ventura@live.com NEarLy NEw tiBEr MEMOry foam matress (double). Cost over 300€, will accept 100€. sOLiD PiNE COsattO baby crib gliding action, in perfect condition 100€. Also baby cam system which fixes to the bath or shower.

Height adjustable, brand new and boxed, 60€.

618 488 294 Email: ladydave@hotmail.com CEMENt MiXEr, ELECtriC, 30€. Buyer collects. Call: 676 491 811 DOg CargO BOX large. 80cm x 60 x 45cm 30€ tUMBLE DryEr Zanussi, as new condition. 100€. MassagE COUCh as new 75€.

CrEaM PaiNtED DrEssEr, vintage style 100€ shiatshU BaCk MassagEr, still boxed, three different settings. Brand New item. 170€ o.n.o. 693 513 462 or email: jantec_98@yahoo.com 7’ wiDE aNtiQUE PiNE double wardrobe, two draws under robe space. 4’ 6” antique pine double bed, side cupboards and dressing table matching above items. All 1,300€. Would sell separatley. Phone Jean 952 550 041 aNtiQUE PiNE DrEssEr, base, 3 cupboards with draws, top, two glass fronted cupboards with lights. Also 6ft extending antique pine dining room table with 6 chairs (2 carvers).

Call: 952 550 041 whitE PVC 2Ft By 4Ft breeding box for cats or dogs, (has been used for guinea pigs & rabbits) Totally secures small animals, flat packs, fully washable. Call: 952 550 041.

20 iPaDs FOr saLE - less than half price.

First come first served only 20 available. See picture on page 103 Call: 66468913 star wars LEgO kits Bought new ranging from £5 - £100. Call for prices 693 269 766

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r e d a r The T E

oto. t inc. ph r e v d a boxed 8 nth.

15€ for 7th of the mocall: 664 210 46 r o s d r 1 o r e w o th 8 th before e mon um of 2 maxim nt to be made efore 15th of th a r fo 3€ Payme tinella.com b n s@these mail sale

Items For Sale (Continued) MEtaL arCh FOrMEr 3 metres wide 15€, MEtaL arCh FOrMEr 1.5 metres wide 10€ JEtMastEr (Model 840) Wood burning fire.

90cms wide x 73cms firebox height. plus additional canopy flue. Bargain at 95€. Tel: 952 03 08 07 LargE stOCk OF DrEss FaBriCs Silk Dupien, Taffeta, Thai Silk, Sandwashed Silk, Crepe, Duchas Silk, Satin Dress Linings, Polyester Dupien, all over lace and trims, all top quality. Suitable for Wedding and formal wear.

Exceptional value. Call: 645 366 641

Wanted i wiLL COLLECt FrEE of charge all your used clothing, bric-a-brac, pots and pans, books, toys, CD´s garden pots, tools, pieces of furniture or anything else you are throwing out whilst you are cleaning. Call me on Tel:- 658 72 92 74 Jacqui waNtED "Fonzie's Busy British style bar bistro requires Cook/Chef, to start in April (mainly evenings). Good working environment and competetive pay and tips. Summer contract with possibility of extension. Call Anne 952 519 733 (closed Wednesdays) Part tiME sPaCE/ rooms available in a busy professional therapy centre in Torrox Costa.

Call 651 956 284 hOUsE sharE. Beautifully maintained house in Las Mayoralas. Own double bedroom, lounge and kitchen, with private terrace and stunning lake views. 250€ a month. Call: 693 513 462 or email: jantec_98@yahoo.com Cash 4 sCraP, we will collect and recycle any old metal, tin cans, batteries etc. Tel: 660148196 waNtED tO rENt, House in 20 Km v1cinity of Velez Malaga. Rural/Coastal fenced, with garage or possible workshop space. Long Term Tel: 630 842 978 wE arE JaN & arthUr BErry, & have recently returned to the UK after living for 7 years in Caleta de Velez. We are experienced housesitters & are available to care for your home and/or animals (in your home) for short or long

periods, in your absence. Arthur is a qualified plumber & DIY enthusiast, so you can rest assured that your home will be in good hands.

Jan speaks Spanish fairly well, so between us, we can deal with any emergencies that may arise. We are available at most times of the year & our services are free of any charges.

We still have many friends in Caleta & can provide excellent references. If you would like to discuss your requirements, please email your phone number to janlberry@hotmail.com & we will call you. Alternatively, tel:0044 1702 351754 waNtED: EXPEriENCED riDEr to share 15.3hh gelding in the Alcaucin area. Good nature but needs someone with confidence.

Small contribution. Tel 693 269 766

Jobs

DrEaM JOB: Nail Technician / artist. Tel: 952 525 289 MaLE EsCOrt, Confidentiality assured, No obligation. Call: 686 730 377 hOUsE sittErs aVaiLaBLE - Responsible English Sisters will look after your house, dogs, cats, plants, pools. Long term or short term.

Free in Nerja area, small change elsewhere.

References available. Contact: 634 015 902 tELEsaLEs Successful telesales office based in Torre del Mar require additional telemarketers. Experienced preferred but not essential, as full training will be given to the successful applicants. Applicants must be, enthusiastic, confident and above all will need to have the desire to be successful, morning and evening shifts available. Tremendous earning potential. Call Kirsty for more information on 951 237 412. waNtED a native English teacher to give private lessons, for 1 hour 3 times a week to 2 children aged 6 and 8 in our home in Mezquitilla. Call: 609 500 378 gOOD, rELiaBLE cleaner has a couple of regular weekly slots left, covering the Vinuela area. References available. Please call Jo on 693269766.

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Busines s

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We can Call tod list your Busin ay on 66 es 4 210 4 s here from ju 68 or E st mail: sa 5 euros a mo les@the sentinell nth!! a.com

Director y

ACCOMMODATION

BLINDS

wEscuela la Crujia Rural B & B & guesthouse in a pretty converted school, 10 minutes from Velez Malaga,Tel: 606 010 580.

Email: toni@escuelalacrujia.com

wsolar blinds, ideal for large glazed areas to keep the view but also giving privacy and stopping maximum amounts of heat/glare and fading of furnishings. solarblinds.es@gmail.com Speak to Ian 644 54 61 76 958 49 65 71

AIR CONDITIONING wFor air Conditioning call Esola, 616 119 007, Torre del Mar

ARTS & CRAFTS w La Vaqueria, Hand made cards, craft materials, gifts, souvenirs, morrocan goods, paintings, mosaics, refreshments to eat in or take away, classes, workshops and much, much more! La Vaqueria, Benamargosa. Opening hours - Tues -Sat 10am-3pm, Closed Mondays 952 517 273 Website: www.la_vaqueria.com E-mail: studio.20lavaqueria@hotmail.com http://www.myspace.com/lavaqueriabenamargosa

BARBERS waxarquia Mobile Barber, 25 years experience, covering all areas of Axarquia. I'll come an find you, only 7â‚Ź. Call Nigel on 686 626 207 or email: nigelpendry@hotmail.com

BEAUTY & BOUTIQUE wLouise Beauty & Boutique The Alcaucin side of lake Vinuela Call: 951 167 181 or 680 855 030

BOOKSHOPS wPasatiempo Calle Infantes 32, Torre del Mar, 952 543 703, www.bookshoppasatiempo.com

BRITISH SUPERMARKETS warkwrights English Shop. Turn right at Venta Baja Crossroads or call: 952 519 780 www.arkwrights-groceries.com

BUILDERS wall types of building work undertaken, 37 years experience, Let me quote you. Call: 952 110 788 or 650 895 461 wreformers terence Mitchell - Renovations & Refurbishments. Professional builders with over 20 years experience. Tiling, painting, plumbing, electricity. Free advice, no obligations. Tel: 664 459 868. terryseatonreformas@hotmail.com www.facebook.com/terryseatonreformas wP&g Builders, 12 years in Spain. ALL work completed. Portfolio of work available. Ring Paul: 636 857 697 ViĂąuela areas. Email: chicken.paul@hotmail.com

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Business Listing BUILDERS (Continued) wPJM Construction. Professional builder experienced in all types of construction from routine maintenance to new builds. Happy to supply references from many satisfied customers. Call now for a no obligation quote 625 348 406 info@pjmilton.com wJr Construction Extensions, Reforms, Tiling (Int & Ext), Terraces, Walls, Garages and Painting. Reliable, Quality Workmanship. For a quotation ring John: 699 261 414 or Richard. 636 857 715. C/Virgen de la Milagrosa Nº 3, Los Romanes, 29713, Malaga.

CAR AND 4 x 4 PARTS wall Makes and Models Land Rover specialists, trade and public welcome. Nationwide delivery service. Call Tropical 4x4 on 650 581 570 / 951 707 785 www.tropical4x4.com

CAR AND VAN RENTAL wOne way van hire, UK, France and Spain.

Call: 952 541 147

CAR HIRE wCar hire, Lowest rates in Southern Spain. UK Company. www.spanish-cars.com

CARS WANTED wwanted all UK plated vehicles. Year 2000 onwards. cash paid. Call: 667 235 205

CARPENTERS wandrew rodgers 20 years experience in kitchens, wardrobes, shelving, aluminium door & windows. Call the Window Doctor for any window problem. Roller shutter blinds, mosquito blinds, security locks, repairs and renewals reasonable rates, Tel: 660 597 894 email: rodgersfamilyinspain@yahoo.co.uk

CARPET & UPHOLSTERY CLEANING wCarpet & Upholstery Cleaning. Professional Machines, 18 years experience. All areas covered. Call Roy on 958 640 068 or 656 561 669.

CHIROPODISTS wregistered Chiropodist/Podiatrist offering a complete footcare service in the comfort of your own home. 15yrs experience NHS & private. Call: 636 866 715

wregistered Chiropodist/Nurse of 20 years.

New in Velez Malaga. Offers the following services:- Foot and hand care (diabetic, veruccas, fungus nails, ingrown toenails). Also home visits. Post hospital aftercare including physio.

Call Teresa: 695 243 238

CHIROPRACTIC CARE wPhilippe Druart D.C., grad. from AECC (GB) and USA, 30 years exp., opens a chiropractic clinic in Frigiliana, C/ Blas Infante, 2 bajo. Consultations: Monday from 16.30 to 20.30, Wednesday and Friday from 10.00 to 14.00 and by appointment. Tel. 951 708 672 & 678 691 387. Email: druphil@yahoo.fr

CLEANING wDone & Dusted, for all your cleaning requirements, for your home, holiday rentals, pool cleans and general maintenance. Competitive rates. Call Juliet 692 437 039 or Stuart 695 925 888 Email: done.dusted@ymail.com

COMPUTERS wPCtorrox.com.All computer problems solved.

Torrox/Nerja and surrounding areas. Free Advice. No Fix No Fee. Hardware, Software and Website solutions. PC service - only 50 Euros.

Call Rab on: 952 967 124 or 645 236 259. wComputer help.Troubleshooting & Repairs.

New PCs supplied with Windows in English.

WiFi installations. Reasonable rates. Microsoft Certified Systems Engineer since 2000. Patient & professional. Call David on 952 54 96 07 or 654 899 976. wComputer Problems? Help is at hand. Upgrades, repairs, hardware and software problems solved, NO FIX - NO FEE. Advice on buying and setting up the right computer for you. Tuition from complete beginners to advanced, get the most out of your PC. Call David Fleck on: 952 510 729 / 620 328 382 email: david@technophobe.es www.technophobe.es

DECORATION & ART wDecoration & Pictures. Heart & soul. www.davictoria.webs.com Call: 630 364 356 Torrox.

DENTISTRY wClinica Europa Centro internacional, Blq. 86, Torrox Costa. Call: 952 53 09 08 Email: clinicaeuropatorroxcosta@gmail.com British dentist, 24hrs response Call: 648 203 157

To advertise call 664 210 468 or email sales@thesentinella.com

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Business Listing DENTISTRY (Continued) wian Pett Dental Care, Five star dental care you can trust. Edif. Al-Zabel, Local 7, Cruce de Periana, 29713 Alcaucin, Puente don Manuel.

951 139 287 / 691 700 587 UK +44 1708 616 148. www.ianpettdentalcare.com wDentadanes s.c Dental Clinic Offering Danish, top quality dental care at Spanish prices.

Established since 1991. We speak English, Danish, Spanish and Italian. Call 952 529 666 Mon - Fri 10-5pm www.dentadanes.com

DOG BOARDING whome From home Dog Boarding at my 10,000m2 finca in Riogordo. No kennels just lots of excercise, fun and cuddles. Call: 678 189 019 or e-mail: riogordo@mail.com www.homefromhome.weebly.com. Also within 15km daily home visits for dogs, cats, horses. whome from home Dog sitting service Warm, friendly home environment, with 121 dog care, exercise and feeding routines maintained. Collection & delivery. Puente Don Manuel Tel: 633191250

DOG GROOMING wthe Dog shop, Professional grooming salon.

All dogs welcome, any size, any breed. Tel: 645 525 782, Centro Comercial, 10, Torrox Park. www.thedogshoptorrox.com wProfessional grooming salon-Professional Canine Beautician, 13 years experience, trained at 'The London Academy of Canine Beauticians', loving approach, expert in dogs with special needs, all breeds welcome. Tel: 692325076

grades Call Stefan 610 048 919 electrocutester@gmail.com wElectrician - Lakeside Property services, 24 hour call out emergency Electrician and Plumber. Call David on: 627 931 357

ESTATE AGENTS/REAL ESTATE wab ax Properties 952 511 103 Website: www.abaxproperties.com wFleming Properties, Calle Las Melosas, Edf Nautico, Torre del Mar, 952 547 131 or 637 278 306, www.fleming-properties.com waxarquia Properties s.LCall; 626 038 851 or 952 436 781www.axarquiaproperties.com Email: sallyharrison@axarquiaproperties.com wBuy a home spain/rent a home spain, Avenida Andalucia, 135, Torre del Mar. Call: 952 547 554 or 680 210 414.

Email: info@rentahomespain.com Website: www.rentahomespain.com

FREIGHT & ONLINE SHOPPING DELIVERIES wFormula Freight, Call us for all your UK to Spain delivery requirements right to your door, to the Costa Tropical. Call: 01296 770029 Email; ian@formula-europe.co.uk www.formula freighteurope.co.uk

FUNERAL SERVICES wFuneral services 952 977 000 / 638 339 691

FURNITURE

wDog training - 'Clicker Training', Beginners, Graduate, One-to-One, all using Kind, Modern, Motivational Methods, email: poshpawsschoolfordogs@hotmail.co.uk or Tel: 633191250

wLargest range of furniture on the Costas.

Guaranteed lowest prices. Quality furniture from the UK. WWW.nerjasofas.es wCudeca Second Hand Furniture Shop, 952 545 212 Calle Infantes 48, Torre del Mar (by Thursday market) Mon-Fri 10.00-13.30 and 17.30-19.30. Saturdays 10.00-13.30 only. If you wish to donate furniture please call Melanie on 638 108 564.

DRESSMAKER

GARDENING SERVICES

wDressmaker/seamstress, with over 20 years experience. High quality, reliable service for alterations, soft furnishings and dressmaking.

Call Elaine on 629 610 919. Located Puente Don Manuel/Periana area. Very reasonable rates. No job too small.

wred Palm Beetles, Wasps, Ants, Woodlice, Mice, Rats and all pests. Processionary Moths.

Call us for treatment and disposal of these garden problems. Tel: 657 165 373

ELECTRICIANS

wrosemary george tarjetas. For all occasions, English & Spanish. Organic, Handmade & much more. Supplying to shops, bars, clubs & individuals. Telephone: 679 982 992 Email: sales@greetingscardsinspain.com

DOG TRAINER

wElectro-Cute! English J.I.B. Electrician. For all your electrical needs and problems. Fault finding/Lighting and power/Air conditioning Electric gates and Intercoms/Pumps, Rewires/Up-

GREETINGS CARDS

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Business Listing GYMS

INTERNET SERVICES

wColmenar gym - offering pilates, circuit training , keeping fit to music and personal training. For more info call Carol: 659 295 346 Email: carolgrant2@tiscali.co.uk

wriosat:sL, No landline required. High speed Internet and telephone services. Some areas free installation. Prices starting from as low as 20 euros per month. Call: 951 239 310 / 626 679 018. Email: info@riosat.com Web: http// www.riosat.com

HEALTH & BEAUTY wweight Control - Herbalife Independent Distributor, Bea Savory, 95 253 4795 beasav@terra.es (business opportunity also available): wweight watchers Meetings in English.

Nerja and Vélez. Call Candace on 952 549 607 or 626 672 493 for further info. candace.edwards@weightwatchers.es wVie at home Cosmetics, Skincare and Homewares. New Spring Catalogue out now. Pamper yourself and have a Cosmetics Party in your home, great Hostess gifts. Consultants wanted to join my Team teri.cosapreciosa@gmail.com Tel: 662 466 249

HOLIDAY LETS wVillas to Let Privately owned luxury villas to let. 627 820 669 www.villaslet.com 958 36 40 16

HORSE RIDING walcaucín horse riding, Lessons, trekking kids club on Sats 10am - midday. Ring Charlotte for more info. 620 609 374. Website: www.horseshoeranchspain.webs.com

HOTELS

INTERPRETERS wspanish woman can help you and you can practice your Spanish with her. Torrox, El Peñoncillo 27, Call: 630 364 356

KENNELS AND CATTERY wwagtails boarding kennels for cats and dogs.

Dogs walked 3 times a day in 36,000 sq metres fenced land. Phone Val 655 579 792 or Richard 645 659 935 or www.wagtails.es wthe Dog house While you are away on holiday or a weekend break, your dogs live in our house alongside our dog. Large play area, lots of country walks. Pet collection/del. service. Vet services on call. Gourmet meals if required.

'Only the best for your pal'. Ring: Phil 649 079 321 Comares/Benamargosa.

Email:philipclayton_1@msn.com Ex cat & dog airlines.UK. Recommended. Refs available. wDog care in our home with us, food, warmth, exercise and affection. Fully netted secure areas. Diet and meds. Ex UK dogs home worker also voluntary work. Call: 669 346 268, Casabermeja. On A45 midway between Antequera and malaga.

KITCHENS

whotel Balcon de Competa, C/San Antonio, 75 Competa. Tel: 952 55 36 62 / Fax: 952 51 67 80 www.hotel-competa.com Email: info@hotel-competa.com

wOrange grove services, top quality kitchens at sensible prices. Tel: 661 713 238 Email: lastgamesoon@hotmail.com

HOUSE CLEARANCES

LAWYERS

wCarousel second hand Furniture, Vinuela Pueblo (Under Cajamar Bank), access via steps at side of bank, or slip road behind bank, 630 211 907

wCarmen silvia, Solicitors Abogados, Spanish solicitors, English Spoken, Torrox Costa, Urb. Costa del Oro local 8, (very near Nota-ria Office). Free initial consultation, 952 967 004 Email: carmensilvia@telefonica.net winternational Law solutions. English speaking Spanish Lawyer. English and Spanish legal advisors. Urb Torrox Park, Zona Comercial 3, tel/fax: 952 527 831 or 615 338 075, Email: info.ils@hotmail.com

INSURANCE wLCJ iNsUraNCE, Not the cheapest, Not the dearest, Almost certainly the best, *Health Insurance, * Travel Insurance - Multi trips, *Car and House Insurance, * Funeral Plans, Call: 952 515 224:

To advertise call 664 210 468 or email sales@thesentinella.com

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Business Listing LOCKSMITHS wBritish Locksmith - 24 hour service, good rates. Tel: 676 262 073

MACHINE HIRE wsaxon sL JCB Digger Hire. New machine Good rates. Velez Malaga Call: 678 23 22 53 or 662 39 83 72

MAINTENANCE wMaintenance person experienced in plumbing, tiling, painting and general maintenance of buildings. Portfolio of previous work carried out available. Friendly, reliable and reasonable rates. No job to small. Los Romanes and surrounding area. Tel: 618 496 266 or email: vramsell@aol.com.

MARKET GOODS wMr Clutter Wants your Goods, House and garage clearances, shops and bars - old stock, any item considered. Call David: 686 375 089 - or if preferred email a list to cullimores@hotmail.com. Cash available and efficient service, Now buying Antiques,Gold & Jewellery

MEDICAL CENTRES wDr. Bernadette Veeger General Medicine 952 532 065, 617 913 196. Consultations by appointment and house visits. English, Español, Deutsch, Francais, Nederlands. Centro Mar y Salud, Paseo Marítimo, El Morche/Torrox Costa, www.centromarysalud.com

MOBILITY PRODUCTS wBlue Badge Mobility.s.L Hire & Sales of Mobility Scooters, Wheelchairs, Bathroom aids, Toilet Aids, Stair Lifts, Long term rentals, Best prices on the Costa. Quality Service. Contact Gary Or Sara 952967015 / 635445279 www.bluebadgemobility.com

MOTHER & TODDLER GROUPS wMother & toddler group at Torre Montessori Nursery in Torre del Mar on Wednesdays from 10:30 to 12:30 - 4€. TL: 633 637 774 Email: torremontessori@gmail.com Address: Calle Laureano Casquero s/n Torre del Mar

NURSERIES

wguarderia/Nursery torre Montessori, an English nursery with Spanish as second language. High adult/child ratios. Open Monday to Friday. Full and Part Time places available. TL: 633 637 774 Email: torremontessori@gmail.com address: Calle Laureano Casquero s/n Torre del Mar

ONLINE SHOPPING wOnline shopping WWW.COOLTIENDA.EU Local online shopping in Spain - FREE P&P. HEALTHY BACK BAGS - Looks Good & Feels Good. The patented Healthy back bag, contours to the shape of your spine, becoming part of you & hence feeling lighter. COOL BANDANAS - Personal cooling products to beat the heat. TILLEY HATS - Made in Canada, UPF50 maximum sun protection, water resistant, Guaranteed for life. COOL DUDE'S Products, now available to buy online. Chillows, Laptop Coolers & more!

WWW.COOLTIENDA.EU

OPTICIANS wheiko stumbeck, Avda Andalucia 119, Torre del Mar, 952 967 923 and C/Antonio Ferrandiz "Chanquete" 23-25, Nerja, 952 528 395. C/Jacinto, Benavente Edf. No. 6, Fuengirola, 952 197 565

OUTSIDE CATERERS wPig n Mix hog roast available for all occasions.Machine rental only or we cater for you.

For prices www.pig-n-mix.com / email: info@pig-n-mix.com or Tel 655137483

PAINTERS wraC Decorators & tilers. All aspects of Painting and Tiling undertaken, Interior & Exterior Tel: 638-489-711 racdecor@ymail.com wPainting, villas, walls etc. Rejas a speciality.

For free quote ring Nick in Vinuela on 676 491811.

PET COURIERS wPet taxi- UK, France & Spain Delivered door to door. Call: 667 235 205

ADVERTISE HERE FROM JUST 5 EUROS PER MONTH CALL 664 210 468

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Business Listing PET TREATS w4 Paws Barkery. The very best handmade, wholesome and pure Gourmet Dog Treats.

Made locally from 100% human quality ingredients. No added preservatives or artificial colours. www.4pawsbarkery.euwsanne h.

PHYSIOTHERAPY Mortensen, BSc (Hons), MCSP, SRP, Spanish registered, Col no 2066. Clinic appointments or home visits in the Axarqùia region. Experienced UK trained physiotherapist offering postoperative rehabilitation and general musculo-skeletal conditions. 626 152 756

PLASTERERS wEnglish Plasterer - good rates. Call Nigel 620 256 092 wstockton Plastering and Damp services Time served plasterer 30 years experience in all aspects of plastering and damp proofing.

Insurance approved and fully legal. Call 648 243 656 for a no obligation quotation or visit www.stocktonplastering.sm4.biz

PLUMBERS wwayne’s Drains & Plumbing Est.1999. 24 Hour call out. Tel/Fax: 952 539 425.

24 Hour Service: 634 275 030 wJohn Folland Plumbing & heating: All jobs from a dripping tap to fully fitted kitchens/bathrooms. No call out charge. Tel John: 622 050 803 or 622 180 606 wJust Plumbing. Just a quick and reliable plumbing service. Just a reasonably priced local business. Just polite, prompt and tidy.

Just phone Dave on 689 647 849. Discounts in Riogordo, Colmenar, Comares.

PRINTING SERVICES wBusiness Cards double sided from 135€ for 500. Flyers double sided full colour from 150€ for 1,000. Call: 664 210 468 wBenaware Print. Competitive prices for single and double sided flyers. Personalised T shirts and greetings cards. Phone 608 631 603 or 952 517 464.

E-Mail russ.benaware@gmail.com

PROPERTY & POOL CARE wExperienced, professional and reliable all

year service. Caring for your Property, Pool and People. References available on request.

Call Ron: 637 995 088, ppp247@hotmail.co.uk www.pppaxarquia.com

PROPERTY RENTALS wBuy a home spain/rent a home spain, Avenida Andalucia, 135, Torre del Mar. Call: 952 547 554 or 680 210 414.

Email: info@rentahomespain.com Website: www.rentahomespain.com wandalucian rental services The Complete Service for Holiday Rentals, Long Term Lets, Changeovers and Pool Cleaning. Covering Benamargosa, Colmenar, Comares and Riogordo. www.andalucianrentalservices.com info@andalucianrentalservices.com Tel: 662 466 249

REMOVALS w2Js removals Ltd, House Clearances, UKSpain-UK, Local and International removals, Reliable service, free quotes, no job too small.

Fully insured. Call: June or John 649 662 012 / 618 846 868 Email: jmcc1957@yahoo.co.uk warnold removals Local & International.

Great service, fair price. Tel: 685 360 193 www.arnoldremovals.es Call. 626 160 869 info@arnoldremovals.es wUk-spain-Uk removals. Complete van loads or just 1 item. We are in the UK every 2 weeks. Pay for just 1 way. Nerja Sofas 608091660 or 951247240 nerjasofas@hotmail.com wC&D removals, Local and International, 2 men, 1 van, 20€ p/hr. Call: 622 222 361

RESTAURANTS wtaj Mahal (Torre del Mar ) Avda. Anadalucia, Blq. Jupiter, Pasaje Timon 2, C/Timon. Tel: 952 547 798 wtaj Mahal (Puente don Manuel) Next door to Chiringuito Antonios, Venta Baja Tel: 952 510 886 or 667 934 731 wtaj Mahal (Torrox Costa) Ctra Vacional - 340 next to Post Office. 952 534 972 / 634 051 635 w restaurant Caribe, Bloque 7, Local 13, Costa del Oro, Torrox Costa. Tlf: 952 530 831

ADVERTISE HERE FROM JUST 5 EUROS PER MONTH 664 210 468

To advertise call 664 210 468 or email sales@thesentinella.com

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Business Listing SATELLITE T.V. wtotal satellite installations Call Phil on: 629 556 266. Email:philbraid@hotmail.com wsky shop torre del Mar. Call: 667 235 205 or 952 541 147 wsat. Co. Freesat HD & Sky Digital, dishes, alignments, installations. We also sell HD TVs. Call TOM 7 days a week for service. 657 484 853. All equipment delivered, installed & guaranteed for 2 years. Free demos every Sat. 2pm

SIGN MAKERS wredhouse signmakers. Suppliers and designers of all types of signs - shops, pavement boards, estate agency for sale boards, vehicle advertising, banner stands and more. New telephone number: 675 091 982. Email redhousesigns@yahoo.co.uk Website: www.redhousesigns.com

SOLAR wsolar solutions, Sales & Servicing. We cover solar hot water, solar electricity (PV), Solar (PV) windmills, Solar pool heating and Pellet central heating systems. For more info visiti Trapiche market every Tuesday or call Andrew 660 597 894 - Spanish and English spoken. Email: andrewthecarpenter@gmail.com

SOLICITORS wC&D solicitors Specialists in Real Estate, Civil and Tax Law. Tel: 952 532 582 www.cdsolicitors.net or email:info@cdsolicitors.net

SPAS & SAUNAS wtime Out spas & saunas. Serving The Costa del Sol for more than 10 Years. Hundreds of Spas Installed! We service all Brands of Spas so come to us - we are the Professionals. 952 52 43 94 www.timeoutspas.com

TYRES wCar, 4x4 and motorcycle tyres supplied and fitted. Punctures repaired, wheel balancing, competitive prices. Also ITV (Mot) welding. For a no obligation quote call: 676 719 066 / 620 627 214 or 952 517 502.

Email: sainbena@hotmail.com Also iron work made to order.

VETS

wNaturvets Competa, Avda. de la Constitucion 15, 952 553 850. Benajarafe, Ctra. Malaga Almeria Km 164, 952 513 207. Mobile: 617001 723 (for both) www.naturvets.com

WEB DESIGNERS wspanglish webs, Web designs, Database Programmes, Hosting, Domains, Real Estate Sites, English – Spanish Translation. All at realistic prices. Call Rachel: 951 708 454 or 691 660 187 Website: www.spanglishwebs.com Email: info@spanglishwebs.com wsokrak web Design, Quality web design at the lowest price! Get an eye catching, easy to navigate website in English, Spanish and more, to make your business available worldwide. All our prices are affordable and include hosting and your domain for the first year with no hidden fees. For more information, visit www.sokrakwebdesign.com or contact us on (+34) 666 731 759

WELLS wwater well: drilling for water supply and irrigation Plumbing and electrical installation, legalisation, water works construction/repairing.

Call us: 666 13 88 86, or e-mail: plumbingwell@gmail.com free consultation.

WINDOW FITTER w window fitter and repairs 26 years ex. ring Mick on 0044 7770972725

WINDOW TINTING w Mobile service itv legal Solar reflective tint for glass curtains, balconies, yachts stop fading, heat ,glare, save money on cooling make living in the sun comfortable. 958 496 571-644 546 176 solarshadetinting@gmail.com

ADVERTISE IN THE BEST BUSINESS DIRECTORY LISTING IN AXARQUIA FROM JUST 5 EUROS PER MONTH 12 MONTHS - 60 EUROS 6 MONTHS - 40 EUROS 3 MONTHS - 30 EUROS CALL: 664 210 468 Email: sales@thesentinella.com

Have your Installation in April

FP0768 A luxury, 94m , three bedroom penthouse with extensive sun terracing and BBQ area overlooking the communal pool and gardens in this popular complex. Ideal holiday or permanent home.

Mortgage available BAVIERA

2

ONLy 249,000€

Venta Baja

FP0754

A 270m2 luxury Mondron FPr0642 villa and apartment with pool and large garage on a 2,300m2 plot set in mature gardens enjoying a private but not isolated location FOr rENt 300€ p/m 399,000€

Caleta de Velez

FP0781

A spacious 99m2, two bedroom apartment in a quiet cul de sac enjoying marvellous views to the sea.

Communal pools 169,000€ and tennis court

A spacious, newly reformed two bedroom village house close to facilities in this small pueblo with roof terrace enjoying views to Mount Maroma.

A really well presented two bedroom villa with enclosed front terrace, pool, gardens and garage with utility room.

Close to all amenities in this popular area 200,000€

Puente don Manuel

FP0753

tOrrE OFFiCE Calle Playa Marina, 2D Torre del Mar. 29740 Tel: 952 54 71 31 Mob: 606 087 362 NErJa OFFiCE Calle El Barrio, 11 Nerja. 29780 Tel: 952 52 41 40 Mob: 637 278 306