The Axarquia Sentinella Edition No 198
www.thesentinella.com
February 21
Since 2002
+34 696 522 171
www.redwell.com 952 539 742
CHIMNEY SWEEP
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Here we all are, and once again some of us are in community lockdowns whilst others can still leave their towns and enjoy eating out or socialising over a coffee, beer or tapas. But whichever level you are at right now, life must go on! So we welcome you to the month of “lurveeeee” when we celebrate St Valentine’s Day on February 14th — also known as the Feast of Saint Valentine. This is a celebration of romance and affection all around the world. Each year, thousands of men and women send greetings cards, gifts, chocolates and roses, but this celebration is not for everyone and some people will live their lives as though this day is just a day like any other.
If you do get to celebrate this day with the current restrictions in place, remember that this year it falls on a Sunday and if you would like to treat your other half, husband, wife or admirer to a wonderful carvery, then one option is to book a table at The Plaza Lounge in Benamargosa. They generally get fully booked so reservations are a must — three courses for just 18 euros is a bargain! Other eateries that would also be a great option — again restrictions permitting — include The Taj Mahal in Torre del Mar or in Puente don Manuel, and Bar Samba in Torre del Mar is doing the traditional roast dinner with a complimentary glass of cava and choccies for 10.95€; again, bookings are advisable. A little further to travel (again if we can!) Firmvm Restaurant in Almunecar; Los Naranjos in Alcaucin; Buddha House in Torrox Costa; TK’s in Torrox Costa; Restaurante Indian Palace in Puente don Manuel; Enjoy in Torre del Mar; Shanghai Chinese in Torre del Mar; Bio Beach Club in El Morche or Indus Chef Spice in Torre del Mar. All these restaurants have adverts inside this magazine so flick through for their contact details and if they are open, support them and book your Valentine a treat. After all, we deserve a treat at the moment — Valentine or no Valentine!
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Editor: Kami Knight sales@thesentinella.com Sales: 664 210 468 / 664 689 138 www.thesentinella.com
Sentinella Axarquia Edition
Deposito Legal MA-1435-2005
No part of this publication, including pictures may be copied, used or reproduced without our prior written consent. The Sentinella accepts no responsibility for alterations to events listed, claims made by our advertisers or information provided by our contributors.
The Sentinella is eternally dedicated to Colin Checkley, the founder and editor of The Sentinel Magazine. May he rest in peace. (Born; 1960 Died; 2004)
www.thesentinella.com
W d m t b p f t s b m m u
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Strange News
I am very excited to say that the new Sentinella website will be going live this month, so do keep looking on www.thesentinella.com and hopefully you will like what you will see. Also, don’t forget to enter our competition on page 90 - good luck! As always, have a lovely month and stay safe, everyone!
Kami Knight x
The Editor (of the original little mag)!
PLEASE NOTE:
All the opening and closing times in this publication will meet with the COVID 19 restrictions.
Many businesses are still open or available for business.
Please call the business in the first instant. Thank you
SUPPORT LOCAL BUSINESSES
The Sentinella
DEADLINE FOR MARCH WEDNESDAY 17TH FEBRUARY Reservations: 664 210 468 Email: sales@thesentinella.com
A case of love A woman has ‘married’ her briefcase after a five-year relationship. Rain Gordon, from Moscow, has finally tied the knot with the love of her life… which just so happens to be a briefcase. The teacher, 24, has always been sexually and romantically attracted to objects, despite having had relationships with human men in the past. In August 2015, she met the briefcase that would become her ‘husband’. Rain had bought the briefcase from a hardware store as a prop for a photoshoot, and soon found herself falling in love. A few months later, Rain and Gideon made the relationship official. And now, five years on, the couple have wed. Rain said: “My fascination with objects began at the age of eight. “From my childhood I believed that a soul is embedded in objects, as well as everything around us. I believe in animism, which means that there is life in everything. “Falling in love with an object is as unpredictable as it is with a person.”
Drink leads to Dion A man changed his name to Celine Dion after having had far too much to drink. Thomas Dodd, 30, a hospitality manager from Tamworth, Staffs, decided to change his name to Celine’s after having a few too many glasses of wine. Thomas – now known as Celine – had the idea while watching one of the Canadian singer’s concerts on YouTube over Christmas. He thought it would be a great idea to officially take her name, but had completely forgotten about it when the official Deed Poll documents landed on this doorstep. Thomas has no plans to go back on his decision and hopes it might get him backstage at one of his idol’s future gigs. But he admits he is dreading telling his bosses about his new moniker and says that his mum has not seen the funny side of it. He said: “I had been planning to go and see her in Vegas but obviously couldn’t due to Covid. So I’ve become a bit hooked with watching her concerts on YouTube as it’s the next best thing. I’m a bit obsessed with her to say the least.”
New listings!
Ref: AD322 Caleta de Velez 5 bedrooms, 2 bathrooms Price: 375,000€
Are you buying or selling a property? We can help you!
Ref: AD316 Colmenar 3 bedrooms 1 bathroom well maintained country property Price: 169,000€
Ref: AD289 Riogordo 4 bedrooms, 2 bathrooms Price: 262,000€
We have everything from beautiful countryside homes to villas and city apartments. Contact us or check out our web to discover the hidden gems of Andalucia!
+34 952 436 781 / +34 609 436 537
Website: www.axarquiaproperties.com Email: sa@axarquiaproperties.com
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Strange News (Continued)
Legal union The marriage of a bodybuilder to a sex doll has been declared legal. Yuri Tolochko, from Kazakhstan, married his fiancée Margo in November after a number of delays due to the pandemic. Pictures posted to Instagram show the sex doll dressed in a white lace gown while Yuri wore a black tuxedo for the ceremony in Kazakhstan. According to local media reports, the union is legitimate because the only requirements for a wedding to take place in Kazakhstan are that both consenting parties have to be male and female and over 18 years old. The bodybuilder, who identifies as pansexual, describes himself as a ‘blogger’ and ‘sexy maniac’ in his Instagram bio. He told the Daily Star he can fall in love with ‘a character, an image, a soul, just a person.’
MANZ PVC WINDOWS & DOORS
Holy sprout! A mother reckons she found Jesus in a Brussel sprout days before Christmas. Shaunagh Roberts, 34, did a double take as she prepared to chop the bottom off the vegetable when she spotted the holy lookalike. She called over her children Jack and Michael Harper (14 and 10) to show them her discovery at their home in Waltham Abbey, Essex. Shaunagh said: “I was taking out the sprouts, topping and tailing them, and putting a cross on the bottom. When I saw the face I remember thinking ‘Oh my God, it could be Jesus’ what with it being so close to Christmas. “I didn’t have the heart to cook him so I left the sprout in a corner cupboard and he just sat up there for a little while.” Jesus the Brussel sprout was put in the recycling bin after he started looking less like Jesus.
Windows Doors
Blinds
Shutters
Mosquito Nets Find us on
manzwindowsanddoors
Shower Doors
Telephone: 655 425 686 or 608 241 429
El Cruce de Periana, Edf. Alzabel Bajo No.3, Puente don Manuel
Email: manzygarcia@gmail.com
Hairdressers Massage Manicures Pedicures Lash Lifts Threading & Waxing Dermal Fillers & Botox Depigmentation Treatments Advanced Facials Dermaplaning CACI Anti-aging treatments LED Light Therapy Brow Henna / Brow Lamination Microblading now available Gift Vouchers available for Hair & Beauty treatments and products Personalised Gift Sets also available Cruce de Periana, Puente don Manuel Call: 951 204 158 / 654 897 410
www.thehairandbeautystudio.online
The Hair and Beauty Studio (keep up to date)
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Modern Times
You know you are living in 2021 when...
1. You accidentally enter your PIN on the microwave.
8. Leaving the house without your mobile phone, which you didn't even have the first 20 or 30 (or 60) years of your life, is now a cause for panic and you turn around to go and get it.
3. You have a list of 15 phone numbers to reach your family of three.
10. You start tilting your head sideways to smile. : )
2. You haven't played solitaire with real cards in years.
4. You whatsapp the person who works at the desk next to you. 5. Your reason for not staying in touch with friends and family is that they don't have whatsapp.
6. You pull up in your own driveway and use your mobile phone to see if anyone is home to help you carry in the groceries. 7. Every commercial on television has a QR code at the bottom of the screen.
9. You get up in the morning and go on facebook before getting your coffee.
11. You're reading this and nodding and laughing.
Menu del Dia - 6.95€ (Vegetarian 6.50€) Monday - Friday 12pm - 4pm 3 courses (including vegetarian)
Special Menu Monday to Friday Choice of starter, Choice of curry, Rice or Naan / Tea or Coffee 10.50€ Avda Andalucia, Bloque Jupiter, Pasaje Timon 2, Calle Timon, Torre del Mar
Tel: 952 547 798 or 631 34 21 93
Open: 13.00 - 17.00 19.00 - 24.00 everyday (closed Tuesday evenings) TAJ Mahal Restaurant www.publisur.net/empresa/1390/taj-mahal-indian-restaurant
DISCOUNT MOTORIST CENTRE YOUR BRITISH FAST FIT CENTRE WHILE YOU WAIT SERVICE TYRES
(free fitting inc. valve and balance)
Trade Counter 664 763 344
Air con service 20% off clutches 15% off Cambelts
Up to
50% off All Brakes fitted (off PVP)
(same day fitting service available)
DIAgNOSTICS AIRCON RECHARgE AND REPAIRS TRANSMISSIONS PRE ITV COLLECTION & DELIVERY Car Cleaning & Valet Service from 40€
Full Service
55€ + Parts
BRAKES / SERVICINg EXHAUSTS / BATTERY SHOCK ABSORBERS CLUTCHES
COMPUTERISED WHEEL ALIgNMENT
Fixed tow bars supplied and fitted from 158.80€+IVA* including all paperwork for obtaining ITV *Example is for Ford Focus 2004, 5 door hatchback, and does not include supply and fitting of electrics
Call John:
952 507 144 / 664 763 344 C/ Julio Romero de Torre, 1 Poligno Industrial Panoleta Velez Malaga info@proneumaticos.com
Starter motors & alternators repaired
(cheaper than recon/new)
OPENINg HOURS MONDAY - FRIDAY 9AM - 6PM
Industrial Estate
Proneumaticos TuVESA All major debit and credit cards accepted
TAJ MAHAL INDIAN RESTAURANT
Home Delivery 6pm - 10.30pm
SPECIAL MENU - 9.50€
Monday - Thursday Day & Night (except Tuesday) Poppadam & Pickles Selection of starters: vegetable samosa or pakora or onion bhaji or Prawn puri or Chicken tikka Main course: chicken, lamb, prawn or vegatable: Korma, Madras, Vindaloo, Balti, Jalfrezy, Rogan Josh, Tikka Masala, Karahi Accompaniments: Plain or Pilau rice or Plain, Garlic, Cheese or Onion Nan Bread or Chapati
FREE Pappadam with Mango Chutney & Pickle Tray with all meals
Menu del Dia Mon-Fri 12pm - 4pm (except Tues)
3 courses €5.95 with veg. curry €6.95 with meat/prawn curry
Takeaways available Free Pappadam & pickle with takeaways
Opening Hours Wednesday - Monday 1pm - 4pm and 6pm - 12am every day Puente don Manuel (Chiringuito Antonio) Tel: 952 510 886 Mob: 667 934 731
Ref: VIN018 Property of the month Price: 280,000€ CASA LOS OLIVOS is truly a surprise. This property is located at the entrance of La Viñuela with all the characteristics of a country house, yet it is built on urban land!!! Therefore, the urban possibilities convert this property into a unique opportunity!!! DON’T DREAM YOUR LIFE, LIVE YOUR DREAM!!!
Country Life Properties has a special offer for all those who need a DAFO as a requirement for selling their house. If you accept our Agency to commercialise your property in exclusivity, Country Life Properties offers you the technical assistance to redact the project. Once sold, we will deduct the cost of the project from our fee. This offer does not include the eventual municipal taxes or the cost of the sealed tank for the waste water
Check our website or call for more details!!!
Selling your property? Contact us: hello@country-life-properties.com
Mario Blancke
MáLAGA LEGAL
Calle Puerta del Mar 3, Local 17, ToRRE dEL MaR (directly opposite the new police station)
Calle San Lorenzo 27, 4b, MáLaga
info@malagalegal.com Tel: 659 752 538 www.malagalegal.com
Emma Romero Lawyer Family law -
divorce, access
Maintenance, Custody
Inheritance and succession
Marta Moreno Lawyer Residence
& immigration
EU & Non-EU
Criminal defence
Ignacio García - Lawyer
Conveyancing – UK style Company Law Banking law – floor clause claims, Unfair clauses
Debbie Ryder - Paralegal Wills, Power of attorney Translation, interpretation Visits to Notary, Town hall, digital certificates
Free initial consultation Professional, friendly experts and ALL in English
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If Only, Heh Men?
Easy Training Courses for Women
1. Silence, the Final Frontier: Where no woman has gone before
2. The Undiscovered Side of Banking: Making deposits 3. Parties: Going without new outfits
4. Man Management: Minor household chores can wait till after the game
5. Bathroom Etiquette I: Men need space in the bathroom cabinet too. 6. Bathroom Etiquette II: His Razor is his
7. Communication Skills I: Tears - the last resort, not the first
8. Communication Skills II: Thinking before speaking
9. Communication Skills III: Getting what you want without nagging 10. Driving a Car Safely: A skill you can acquire 11. Telephone Skills: How to hang up
12. Introduction to parking
13. Advanced Parking: Backing into a space 14. Water Retention: Fact or fat
15. PMS: Your Problem... Not his 16. Dancing: Why men don't like to
17. TV Remotes: For men only
Family Run Traditional Butchers Shop Purveyors of meat, poultry, homemade dry cured bacon, homemade sausages, homemade pies, cooked ham and much more! DELIVERIES AVAILABLE THROUgHOUT AXARQUIA
Tel: 951 730 422 / 618 036 397
Calle Ruperto Anduez, NERJA SHOP ONLINE on: www.tonysbutchers.es
Tony’s Butchers
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es l d i r t n Wor u o C he Of T
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list -Z d A rld rie wo va he and t h d un ric r ro very ... u in o h a ge 43 y wit herita 1 tr er mb oun Nu s a c i
R
eru P of c i l b epu
Population - 30 million Languages - Spanish Located - South America Capital - Lima Currency - Nuevo sol Religion - Christian Main Exports - Fish/fish products Literacy Rate - 94.5% Life Expectancy - 75 years G.D.P. Per Capita - uS $5,450 Total Area - 1.28 million sq km National Sport - Football
Interesting Facts... Peru literally has it all; beauty, a deep rich history, mystery, adventure, dramatic and diverse landscapes, unimaginable architectural feats, wildlife, bright vibrant people and clothing and amazing food.
The Lost city of Machu Picchu, one of the most famous landmarks in Peru, was voted in 2007 as one of the New Seven Wonders of the World. The potato is originally from Peru, and there are over 3,000 different varieties. Proud Peruvians use the phrase “Soy mas Peruano que la papa� (I am more Peruvian than the potato). The Largest Flying Bird on Earth can be found in Peru, The Giant Andean Condor.
There are 3 official languages in Peru: Spanish, Quechua and Aymara, but east of the Andes in Amazon jungle regions it is thought that natives speak 13 different indigenous languages.
Mobile: +34 618 963 609 Email: info@detropen.es Web: www.detropen.es Autovia del Mediterráneo A7, exit 272, Vélez-Málaga Open Monday to Saturday 9am to 8pm
13,000m2 Showroom
ROMEO® Terrace Cabinet by Biohort Size M €879
Biohort® Chest for garden LEISURE CHEST 160 Alto €559
Lounge Set L-Shape Cover 250/90 × 250/90 × 70 - €97.40€ €76.95
www.detropen.es
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What’s New This Month
Russells Supermarket in Torrox Costa would like to inform customers that they are doing their very best to maintain stock levels and offer their usual wide range of your favourite British and international brands on the shelves... Due to the complications of deliveries from the UK because of Brexit, some deliveries have been delayed at the begining of the year. However, they fully expect things to steadily improve over these coming weeks and despite the problems, still stock countless lines at great prices. For latest info check out their website: http://www.russells.es and don’t forget that Russells offer a home delivery service throughout Axarquia. See advert on page 24 The world’s first contactless payment ring arrives in Spain. Order your K Ring and save 30% off with the ‘launch in Spain offer’. With the K Ring, there’s no need to handle cash or touch a pin pad so you can leave your cards and phone safely in your pocket. Just look out for the contactless payment symbol. What better Valentine’s gift, this digital K Ring will put a smile on both men and women’s
faces. See main advert on page 50
Vetiver is a rapid growing and non-invasive sterile clump grass with a height of 1-2 metres and a root system of 3-4 metres in depth. Located in Sayalonga where we plant year round, but our best results by far start in February. The reason is that Vetiver is indigenous to India and Vetiver loves the heat of the summer. Use Vetiver cuttings as mulch around all of your fruit trees. Decomposing Vetiver improves soil quality, keeps the weeds down and the insects away all while helping to maintain soil moisture. See main advert on page 53 If you have a business in the Axarquia region and would like to promote it so it’s in the hands of our readers, contact us today on 664 210 468 or email: sales@thesentinella.com We look forward to promoting and distributing your advert throughout Axarquia!
Are you looking for a pool constructor who can repair, refurb or construct a swimming pool? Look no further, because at Axarquia Pools we do it all
Re-tiling / acid cleaning and re-grouting - External electrical lighting, pool lighting, electrical pump refurbishment and renewal - Access ladders and step construction Construction of swimming pools / wet areas and external showers Leak detection and repair - Salt systems - Pool covers / safety nets - Pool automation
Swimming Pool Leak Detection and Repair Specialist Equipment coupled with 17 years of experience We can detect leaks in swimming pools, jacuzzis, depositos and mains water If you think you may have a leak call Calvin on: 666 659 876 or email: calvinlyness@gmail.com
Hair Experts Hi-lights / Lowlights Balayage / Ombre / Roots / Colouring Colour Correction Wash Cut & Blow Dry Re-Style/Gents Cuts SWEET Professional Straightening System Scalp & Hair Therapy Treatments. 952 965 646 608 782 348
Gift Vouchers available for Hair & Beauty treatments and products
Breakfasts, Lunches, Homemade Desserts Extensive menu Veggie and Vegan options Come and enjoy their lovely warm, cosy terrace. Heated by 2 brand new terrace heaters!!! The things they do for you!!
Simply the Best Full English!
Tel: 640 569 988
Avda. Andalucia, 34, Torre del Mar (opposite old Police Station)
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Children
To those of us who have children in our lives, whether they are our own, grandchildren, nieces, nephews, or students... here is something to make you chuckle.
Whenever your children are out of control, you can take comfort from the thought that even God's omnipotence did not extend to His own children. After creating heaven and earth, God created Adam and Eve. And the first thing he said was “DON'T!” “Don't what?” Adam replied. “Don't eat the forbidden fruit.” God said. “Forbidden fruit? We have forbidden fruit? Hey Eve... we have forbidden fruit!” “No Way!” “Yes way!” “Do NOT eat the fruit!” said God. “Why?” “Because I am your Father and I said so!”, God replied, wondering why he hadn't stopped creation after making the elephants. A few minutes later, God saw his children having an apple break and he was ticked!”
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“Didn't I tell you not to eat the fruit?” God asked. “Uh huh,” Adam replied. “Then why did you?” said the Father. “I don't know,” said Eve. “She started it!” Adam said. “Did not!” “Did too!” “DID NOT!” Having had it with the two of them, God's punishment was that Adam and Eve should have children of their own. Thus the pattern was set and it has never changed. If you have persistently and lovingly tried to give children wisdom and they haven't taken it, don't be hard on yourself.
If God had trouble raising children, what makes you think it would be a piece of cake for you?
Los Naranjos
Bar Restaurant Alcaucín
Breakfasts, Menus, Specials, BBQs....
Menu del dia 8€ - Saturdays at noon - Paella goat and Lamb are our specialities! - Take away available Excellent food inside and out! Under table heating inside! Spectacular terrace with wonderful views!!
Warm and Cosy Open 8am - 4am (closed Wednesdays) Calle de la Fuente, Alcaucín (under bank next to post office)
Tel: 951 041 535 Mob: 619 390 146 608 553 075 We speak English
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Answering Machine Messages
Imagine hearing these voice mail messages when you call your mates... Most bizarre!
message after the beep...The roses are mouding, the violets are rotten, and I might call you back, if I haven't forgotten.”
“Hi, we aren't in at the moment, if you are trying to sell us something please start speaking now and hang up at the beep, everyone else start speaking at the beep and hang up when you've finished.”
“Hello?... Hello?... Hellooo? I'm sorry, you're gonna have to speak up, I can't hear you... That's 'cuz I'm not home! Leave a message. BEEP.”
“Roses are red, some willows weep, please leave your message, after the beep.”
“I'm not here, so say goodbye, or leave a message, and I'll reply.”
“Hey guess who this is? You guessed it. Guess what you have to do now? You guessed it. Guess what's next? You guessed it...”
“Roses are red, violets are blue, Sugar is sweet, and so are you. The roses have wilted, the violets are dead. The sugar bowl's empty, and so is your head. The roses stink, sorta like sheep. But leave your name, number, and
“We might be in, we might be out, but leave a message and you might find out!”
“You are dazed, bewildered, trapped in a world with no time, where colour collides with sound, and shadows explode. You see a sign up ahead. This is no ordinary answering device; this is ‘The Twilight Phone’.” “This call may be recorded or monitored for quality and training purposes. If you don't wish this call to be monitored or recorded, then please let the answering machine know when you leave your message.”
“Hi. This is John: If you are the phone company, I already sent the money. If you are my parents, please send money.”
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POWER CUTS
Linea Directa
ARE YOU COVERED Power cuts to your utilities are a nuisance. Waking up to a warm fridge, a kettle that no longer works, or finding out you have no hot water. Power outages are unpredictable, but with Línea Directa youcan cover the eventualities and know whom to contact when the power goes off.
WHAT ABOUT DAMAGE FROM POWER OUTAGES? That depends on your policy. Standard home insurance policies from Línea Directa will cover damage to household appliances and electrical installations resulting from a power cut for up to €12,000. Lackof central heating and power can have a knock-on effect on essential appliances such as fridge freezers. Línea Directa covers your food and drink up to the value of €300 per claim in the event of an accidental power failure. BE PREPARED If violent storms have been forecasted for your area you can prepare some useful items that may come in handy. Torches, candles, batteries and matches kept close to hand. Cool boxes can help safeguard perishable food, and keep some freezer packs ready in the
952 147 834
freezer. A portable mobile phone charger or power bank will keep lines of communication open.
HOW TO GET COVERED Call Línea Directa on 952 147 834 and speak to one of their English-speaking customer service people and find out which cover best suits your needs. TOTAL REASSURANCE Over 3 million people trust Línea Directa for total peace-of-mind. They have been providing specialist insurance for British expatriates for over 20 years.
We hope the information provided in this article is of interest. If you would like to contact Línea Directa please call 952 147 834. More information about Línea Directa online at www.lineadirecta.com
SECOND Time Around
Second Time Around - First class OFFERS Receiving now and selling your unwanted items on your behalf
FEBRUARY OFFER - 10% OFF ALL GREETINGS CARDS 25% OFF ALL CALENDARS HURRY NOT MANY LEFT. VALENTINES DAY, WE HAVE (HALF PRICE) GIFT SETS & a selection of Valentines cards. Bring any gift in and we will wrap it for 1€. REGISTER WITH US TO HAVE YOUR POST DELIVERED FREE OF CHARGE.
LOCKDOWN
If we are in lockdown and forced to close, you may ask for an appointment and collect Greetings Cards from us, OR meet us when we go to the bank once a week in Torre, OR anywhere inbetween. The latter is open to anyone unable to get to our store anytime. Make sure you register in the Padron with your town hall, this gives them benefits from Madrid for extra Police & Doctors, which greatly effects the area that you live in. Whether or not you are resident, this effects you, and does NOT affect any of the rights you have in the UK. Keep Safe and take care, hopefully this will be over before we know it!! Now we are out of Europe you may need to obtain a Spanish number. Lobster, which will offer you, unlimited calls to Europe and USA main or mobile numbers. See why half of Spain are pleased with this English speaking phone provider.
Our telephone number for any information: 659 375 603
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Turn right at Cruz de Periana, (opposite PepeCar Mechanic) Puente don Manuel Tel: 659 375 603 Linda Joan Edwards Monday - Saturday 9am – 2pm
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Random Love
A woman is like a pack of cards... You need a heart to love her A diamond to marry her
A club to smash her head in
And a spade to bury the b***h
------------------------------------------------------------A Love Story I shall seek and find you. I shall take you to bed and control you. I will make you ache, shake and sweat until you grunt and groan. I will make you beg for mercy. I will exhaust you to the point that you will be relieved when I leave you. And you will be weak for days. All my love, The Flu
Things To Think About!
1. You spend the first two years of their life teaching them to walk and talk. Then you spend the next sixteen telling them to sit down and shut up. 2. Mothers of teens now know why some animals eat their young.
3. Children seldom misquote you. In fact, they usually repeat word for word what you shouldn't have said! 4. The main purpose of holding children's parties is to remind yourself that there are children more awful than your own.
5. We childproofed our homes, but they are still getting in. Advice for the day: Be nice to your kids. They will choose your nursing home one day.
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Moving From Survivor To Thriver
Often people who have experienced trauma or difficult situations in the past label themselves as a “survivor”. This is true. They’ve survived a difficult time in their lives. But that label can be quite limiting. It can be referred to as the “Lifeboat Identity”
When the ship is sinking it is imperative to get on the lifeboat. It’s not a comfortable experience but at least you’ve survived! Those survivors desire to get to land, exit the lifeboat and start living again. Many people simply stay in the lifeboat but are still uncomfortable and frightened at times, just being “survivors” not knowing how to move past that experience and start actually “thriving”.
Wouldn’t it be great to become empowered, get out of the lifeboat and return to land – return to being the person they were meant to
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be before the trauma sank the ship, being that person who is living a full, rich and thriving life, in charge of their own life and destiny. ‘Surviving’ is only the first step, keep stepping and move ahead to ‘Thriving’. Call Kate Blatherwick to start your journey towards thriving into the future.
If you have a problem that is preventing you from moving forward with your life give Kate a call on 711 003 171 to book a free consultation and take that first step to creating the future that is rightfully yours.
Kate Blatherwick is a clinical hypnotherapist, psychotherapist and life coach with many years’ experience helping people to make those changes that change their life. See main advert below
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Bespoke Funeral Or Memorial Service
I’m Wendy, an Independent Celebrant who celebrates life’s important moments, and there’s nothing more important than saying goodbye to your loved-ones in a way that is right for you. I compose, write and deliver non-religious funeral services for the English-speaking community here on the Costa Del Sol.
Why did I become a celebrant? Well, a family funeral service, despite all the planning, didn’t go as we had wanted. We had spent a lot of time speaking to the person leading the ceremony, and on the day we didn’t recognise who they were talking about. It was as though they’d not heard a word we’d said. I was very unhappy, I knew there had to be a better way. It was then I looked at re-training as a Celebrant.
When planning a funeral, it’s important to get it right. It’s the last chance we have to say goodbye to someone we love, and so it has to be exactly as you want it to be. We are celebrating the life of your loved-one, so I take the time to listen, understand and get to know that person through your memories and stories. When writing, I pull together all of those memories and funny stories, crafting a
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personalised service, the celebration of that person’s life.
With me leading your service you can have music of your choice, whether you like classical, Cliff Richard or Ed Sheeran, that won’t be a problem. I will help you choose any poems or readings and be there to guide you every step of the way.
I work with all the local Tanatorios/Crematoria as well as the major insurance companies so do ask for me by name. Have you thought about a memorial service on a boat or in your garden? If you would like more information on how to personalise a funeral service for your loved-one please contact me. W: www.wendysherwoodcelebrant.com E: hello@wendysherwoodcelebrant.com T: +34 711 004 185 +44 (0)7951 510717
Testimonial: Thank you for all your hard work with this. Everybody said how lovely the service was and the order of service was perfect. Amanda, Spain See main advert below
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Things You Don’t Want To Hear During Surgery
If you are unfortunate to be under the knife and moreover it’s only a local anaesthetic, or you happen to wake up during an op, then below are a few things you won’t want to here....
1) “Better save that. We'll need it for the autopsy.”
2) “Accept this sacrifice, O Great Lord of Darkness.”
3) “Bo! Bo! Come back with that. Bad dog!” 4) “Wait a minute, if this is his spleen, then what's that?”
5) “Hand me that... uh... that uh... that thingy there.” 6) “Oh no! Where's my Rolex.”
Broomfield Construction
7) “Oops! Hey, has anyone ever survived from 500ml of this stuff before?”
8) “There go the lights again?”
9) “Ya know, there's big money in kidneys and this guy's got two of 'em.” 10) “Everybody stand back! I lost my contact lens!” 11) “Could you stop that thing from beating, it's throwing off my concentration.” 12) “What's this doing here?”
13) “I hate it when they're missing stuff in here.”
14) “That's cool. Now can you make his leg twitch by pressing that one?!”
15) “Well folks, this will be an experiment for all of us.” 16) “Sterile schmerile. The floor's clean, right?”
& Property Maintenance All aspects of building work undertaken Plastering Plumbing Tiling Rendering Kitchens Terraces Bathrooms House Reforms Wet Rooms Call Matthew: 711 002 689 Urb. El Mirador de la Axarquia, 25 Vivienda, Alcaucin Email: broomfieldmatthew@gmail.com www.broomfieldconstruction.es
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UK Lockdown Reverses Pound’s Brexit Deal Gains
Staying on top of the latest currency news can help you time your transfers more effectively, so find out what you should be looking out for over the next couple of weeks…
Latest currency news - Over the past couple of weeks, the pound has experienced dramatic swings in movement following the announcement of a Brexit deal as well as a new lockdown in England. During this period, we’ve seen GBP/EUR fluctuate between €1.09 and €1.12 whilst EUR/GBP slipped back to £0.90. Meanwhile, GBP/USD climbed just shy of $1.37 before slipping back to $1.34, at the same time that EUR/USD has fallen back from $1.22 to $1.21.
What’s been happening? - The pound received a boost in the last week of 2020 as an eleventh-hour Brexit trade deal between the UK and EU prompted a notable relief rally in Sterling. However, we saw a large portion of these gains erased at the start of 2021 following the news that most parts of the UK would be going back into a strict lockdown. The US dollar, meanwhile, has faced notable
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pressure as demand for the safe-haven currency was undermined by US stimulus hopes, although renewed coronavirus concerns have seen USD exchange rates begin to rally in recent days. At the same time, the euro largely maintained its bullish run through the end of 2020 but has started to lose momentum at the start of 2021, amidst some gloomy data and rising coronavirus cases.
What do you need to look out for?- Looking ahead, any upside in the pound is likely to remain limited for the foreseeable future due to concerns over the economic impact of the new lockdown, particularly as the shadow of tougher restrictions looms large. The euro could also face some hurdles in the coming weeks, amidst the spread of a more infectious stain of Covid-19 across the continent and concerns over the slow pace of vaccine rollouts in the EU. For USD investors the focus looks to be on the incoming Biden administration, with hopes for more stimulus measures likely to help prop up market sentiment and weaken the US dollar. At Currencies Direct we’re here to talk currency, to find out more see contact details in main advert below
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Out And About In Torrox
Torrox is the name of a collection of locations situated east of Torre Del Mar. This is a popular spot to live and holiday for both Spanish and other European nations with one big factor being it has the best climate in Europe. Each of these places have much to offer in their own right and collectively, they form a lovely area to live, work and relax. Torrox Costa is located just 15km from Torre Del Mar. Torrox Costa has a totally different character and personality to its near neighbour. Like much of this coast, there’s an impressive promenade that sweeps the length of the beaches here. At its eastern end, just past the lighthouse, the beach is dog friendly and is a great spot to let your furry friend run along the shoreline.
Torrox Pueblo is situated at the foothills of the Alpujarra mountains, a couple of miles inland from Torrox Costa. This is traditional white-washed village set in a green valley. There’s a traditional Spanish feel to this small village, despite it being the home to many people from other parts of the world. Located between Torrox Costa and Pueblo, Torrox Park is a large collection of urbanisations that are popular relocation spots with those who decide to make this area of Axarquía their home. There’s property to suit every budget and style: spacious villas, townhouses and apartments along with a large and well equipped mobile home park that allows all year living. Whilst, in itself, Torrox Park, doesn’t offer much for day trippers, many visitors stay here as homes are frequently listed for holiday rental. It does provide all the services required for a smooth stay or relocation: bars, restaurants, supermarkets as well as doctors, chemists, hairdressers etc.
The combination of Torrox Costa, Pueblo and Park is a winning one. Each has their own distinct character but each are connected to form an excellent place to stay, explore and maybe even to live. Shop Local - Support Your Local Community
For more information call us on: Paco & Antonia 952 535 417 :: 646 75 24 63 Or email us at: info@razahotel.com Or visit our website at: www.razahotel.com
NAILS & BEAUTY BY SUZI JACKSON
952 530 122 / 711 047 122
within Rebeccah Curtis Beauty and Wellness
Open Tues - Sat 10am - 6pm
Rebeccah Curtis Beauty and Wellness
Urb. Laguna Beach, Centro Comercial B, No.16 TORROX COSTA
If you have a business in Torrox that you would like to advertise to our readers, call to reserve your space. 664 210 468 A great Nepali and Indian Restaurant in Torrox Costa, Buddha House. A modern restaurant with classic dishes and Buddha House specials. Closed Monday lunch. Ctra. El Penoncillo 11, Torrox Costa. See FB page Buddha479
BEAUTY AND WELLNESS CENTRE & HAIRDRESSINg Open Tues - Sat 10am - 6pm Tel: 952 530 122 / 651 956 284 Rebeccah Curtis Beauty and Wellness Urb. Laguna Beach, Centro Comercial B, o N .16 TORROX COSTA
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Out And About In Torrox
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Rebeccah Curtis Wellbeing Centre Beauty and Hairdressing and now incorporating Nails and Beauty by Suzi Jackson. Urb. Laguna Beach, Centro Commercial B, No. 16 Torrox Costa. Open Tuesday - Saturday 10am - 6pm. Tel: 952 53 01 22 & 651 956 284
Raza Hotel have excellent facilities for your Dog, Cat or Rabbit, the perfect Hotel for your pets while you are away. In the countryside your dogs can enjoy secure outdoor play areas with toys provided & kennels with indoor sleeping area & outside run. For Cats, large catteries with cosy beds, toys & activities to keep them occupied. The Raza Hotel also offer a safe place to leave your Rabbit or Parrot as well as providing dog grooming services. Open 10am-7pm, 7 days a week. If you would like to visit, Paco & Antonio would be happy to show you the facilities. For more info call: 952 52 5417, 646 75 24 63, or email: info@razahotel.com or visit www.razahotel.com
TK’s
Modern Nepali & Indian restaurant with classic dishes and Buddha House specialities Air Conditioned Ctra El Peñoncillo 11, Torrox Costa (Easy Parking in front) Open 12:00 - 15:30 and 18:30 - 23:30 (Closed lunchtimes Mondays) 10% discount on takeaways Tel: 952 53 09 21 or 612 473 023 Email: buddhahouse479@gmail.com Buddha479
Torrox Costa
Bar y Restaurante Laguna Beach - Torrox Costa
Breakfasts, Snacks & Full Menu Specialising in Ribs, Steaks & Chicken Traditional Sunday Lunch Homemade Tapas available every day changing daily from 1€
Tuesday - Saturday 10am - 3pm / 6pm - Late Sunday 1pm - 5pm (bookings advisable) Closed Monday For more info call: Thomas or Kerstin
Tel: 642 598 217
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Valentine No Nos
Guys, if you hit the town on Valentine’s night and meet your dream girl, then please DON’T use any of the pick-up lines you see here: “Do you have a Bandaid? Because I just scraped my knee falling for you.” “There must be something wrong with my eyes, I can't take them off you.”
“Girl, you better have a licence, cuz you are driving me crazy!”
“Hey baby, you've got something on your butt: my eyes.”
“Hi, I make more money than you can spend.”
“I hope you know CPR, because you take my breath away.”
“Damn, if being sexy was a crime, you'd be guilty as charged!” “I must be in heaven because I'm standing next to you!”
“If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put U and I together.”
“You must be from out of space cause I can see the stars in your eyes.”
“Can I have directions? "To where?" To your heart.” “Baby did you fart, 'cause you blow me away!”
“Hi, I'm Mr. Right. Someone said you were looking for me.” “You know what? Your eyes are the same colour as my Porsche.”
Service, installation & repair of air conditioning. Supply and installation of all makes and models including Daikin, Mitsubishi and Fujitsu. Best prices guaranteed
Winter Warmer special offer. get warm now! with our A++ hot/cold AC units supplied and fitted from only €550 + IVA Polar Air Conditioning First to be built on reputation, reliability and recommendation
Zodiac Z300 M4 9KW Heat Pump for 25m3 pools
RRP €3,521 including IVA. Our one off special offer is €2,100 including IVA. Installation cost from €299+IVA. Only whilst stocks last.
WINTER POOL COVERS SUPPLIED TO MEASURE FROM ONLY €599
THERMAL POOL COVERS ALSO AVAILABLE TO MEASURE WITH OR WITHOUT ROLLER SYSTEM
DAIKIN & MITSUBISHI INVERTERS SUPPLIED & FITTED FROM €750
info@polarair.eu
Call Jordan: 655 211 192
www.polarair.eu
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Faceless
Gelima & Home Abroad The AllroundHome Solutions...
OUR SERVICES wSanitary Works
wLeaktrack Technology wPool Services
wProperty Management (inside & out)
wSales / Rentals (long term / holiday lets) wKey Management
+34 685 83 81 88 +32 490 39 40 36 +32 494 85 00 60 www.homeabroad.eu HOME ABROAD The right way to..... www.gelima.be
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Residency Post Brexit
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We are now in the post Brexit world with
We do appreciate that everyone’s situation is
citizens who wish to come and take up
requirements may seem difficult to overcome.
all the changes it is bringing for British
residence in Spain. For those who can
prove they were resident in Spain prior to
31st December 2020 AND hold the Green
card or Green A4 Document, they can still apply for the new TIE card and have until
June to obtain it. This is very important as
Spanish banks and authorities are going
to require sight of this to keep accounts
open, as it is in effect evidence of legal
residence. We can assist with these
applications and you can contact us on
info@decottalaw.net.
New applicants for residency are going to
have to make appointments at the Spanish Consulate in London. At present this is
temporarily closed as a result of Covid 19.
Once it re-opens, new applicants will need to apply for a Visa (Visado) which would be
stamped into their passport so that they can apply for their residency when they come to Spain.
The biggest difference is the income
requirement which is considerably higher than the previous levels. Private Medical insurance will be necessary.
The Golden Visa is a different type of Visa if you have monies to invest in real property
and the application can be made after your purchase, or if you have signed a private
deposit contract and can prove the monies are available for completion.
different and the documentation and other
However, we can discuss your case and a
specialist lawyer can obtain the information you need to make your decision about residency and future tax residency.
Contact us on info@decottalaw.net or call
+34 952 527014
www.decottalaw.com
Nerja – Mijas Costa – Coín - Tenerife See main advert below
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Aaaargh!! Doesn’t It Annoy You When...
1) There's a car alarm nearby that goes on for hours and the owner is nowhere to be found? 2) There's a cop car in sight and everyone thinks they have to drive 10-15 mph slower than the speed limit?
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10) Your tyre gauge lets half the air in your tyre out when all you want is a pressure reading.
3) You're reading a magazine and all those annoying little leaflets keep falling out?
11) There's a dog in your neighbourhood that barks at EVERYTHING and does not stop!
4) You tell someone that a door is locked and they try to open it anyway, like it'll magically open for them and not you. 5) Someone says, "well, to make a long story short" and then they go on telling it for another 15 minutes. 6) A friend or family member says "Yuck! This is awful!!" and then tells you to try some.
12) The lift stops at every floor and nobody gets on.
7) You have to inform five different sales people in the same shop that you're just looking around. 8) You rub on hand cream and can't turn the bathroom doorknob to get out. 9) A waiter or waitress is not around at any time other than right after you put food in your mouth.
13) You almost ALWAYS back up your computer files but the week you don't, your hard drive crashes and you lose everything.
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f o Z ls A cktai Co
ails ckt o rC A ula ith op ng w p st ni mo egin e b h t to nes ide the o u t g re rea e a A g Her Alabama Slammer Cocktail 1 ounce Southern Comfort 1 ounce amaretto 1 ounce sloe gin 2 ounces orange juice Garnish: orange wheel Garnish: maraschino cherry
1 ounce ice water (cold) 2 dashes anisette 2 dashes Angostura Bitters
Anejo Highball 1 1/2 ounces rum (aĂąejo) 1/2 ounce orange curacao 1/2 ounce lime juice 2 dashes Angostura Bitters 2 ounces ginger beer Garnish: 1 lime wheel Garnish: 1 orange slice
Amarula & Eve Cocktail 1 1/2 ounces Amarula Cream 1/2 ounce citrus vodka 2 1/2 ounces lychee juice 3/4 ounce grapefruit juice (ruby red) Garnish: lychee fruit
Americano 1 1/2 ounces Campari 1 1/2 ounces sweet vermouth 1 to 2 ounces soda water (to taste) Garnish: lemon twist or orange slice
Aperol Spritz Cocktail 1 slice orange 3 ounces prosecco (chilled) 2 ounces Aperol 1/2 ounce club soda
Arnold Palmer (non-alcoholic) 3 ounces lemonade 6 ounces iced tea Garnish: lemon slice Aviation Cocktail 2 ounces gin 1/4 ounce maraschino liqueur 1/4 ounce crème de violette 1/2 ounce lemon juice (fresh) Garnish: flamed lemon peel Abbey Cocktail 1 1/2 ounces gin 3/4 ounce Lillet Blanc 3/4 ounce orange juice 2 dashes orange bitters Garnish: maraschino cherry Absinthe 1 ounce absinthe
Adonis Cocktail 1 ounce dry sherry 1/2 ounce sweet vermouth 1/2 ounce dry vermouth 2 dashes orange bitters
Affinity Cocktail 1 1/2 ounce Scotch whisky 1/2 ounce sweet vermouth 1/2 ounce dry vermouth 2 dashes orange bitters
Almost a Collins Cocktail 1 1/2 ounces vodka (Ketel One) 1 ounce blood orange juice 1/2 ounce cinnamon simple syrup 3 ounces blood orange soda (Dry Sparkling) Garnish: blood orange wheel Garnish: cinnamon stick
American Collins Cocktail 8 blueberries 4 cherries (Bing; pitted) 1/2 ounce lemon juice 3/4 ounce simple syrup 1 1/2 ounces gin (Bombay Sapphire) 4 ounces club soda (or enough to fill) Garnish: Bing cherry Garnish: lemon wheel
American Dream Cocktail 1 ounce pomegranate liqueur (Pama) 1 ounce black cherry rum 1 1/2 ounces pomegranate cherry juice (POM Wonderful) 1/2 ounce sour mix (fresh) Garnish: white fondant stars Garnish: blueberries Angel's Delight 3/4 ounce gin 3/4 ounce triple sec 1 ounce cream 2 to 3 dashes grenadine
All served with crushed ice
Healthy Food with Art Gallery
Saturday & Sunday Live Music from 2.30pm ................................................ February’s Art Exhibition Call for more info ................................................ Non-stop kitchen until 11.30pm
You must try our draught beer from our very own Bodega
Open 9am - 11.30pm Closed Tuesdays Paseo Maritimo, El Morche, Torrox
Puente don Manuel
Opening hours Tuesday - Sunday 13:00 - 16.00 / 18.00 - 22.30
Barriada Buena Vista, Puente don Manuel, Alcaucin Tel: 952 510 963 Mob: 616 942 212
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Is Your Electricity Bill Too High?
Do you think you are you paying too much for your electricity? You don’t have to. At Axarenergy Daniel can organise everything for you from start to finish, with no fee for you, the client! The mission of Axarenergy is to find the perfect electricity plan for you so you can save each month on your electricity bill. All Daniel asks is you send a copy of the front and back of your last electricity bill on Whatsapp to 662 114 241 or by email to hola@axarenergy.com so he can assess it and where possible send you a new proposal with a new company. The majority of customers that he can save money for are ones that currently have a contract with Endesa as their rates are seemingly higher than other companies and with more than 15 companies with over 50 offers Daniel can save you money! I used Daniel approximately 16 months ago and I have not looked back, with a saving of approximately 15 – 20 euros a month I am very happy. The process was so easy too, Daniel took care of everything and like I mentioned earlier I didn’t have to pay
anything for his time or service. The whole transition was very smooth including cancelling the contract from Endesa which was my fear, that it hadn’t been done correctly and they would continue billing me or something, but I even received a letter from Endesa stating that my contract with them had ended. So I am now a very happy customer with ‘Fox Energy’. Daniel has changed over more than 1000 customers in the Axarquia area who are all making a significant saving on their electricity bills. If you are a business owner. renting a property or reside in a rental property and the electricity bill is in the owner’s name, this can still be changed over with no stress to the client, all Daniel needs is a copy of the rental contract and a copy of the Landlords DNI/Passport and at the point of you leaving the premises you can put Daniel in touch with the Landlord and he will put the electricity bill back to their name, again with no cost to the Landlord or you, the client. If you would like to save some money, send your bills to Daniel. Send a copy of your bill to Whatsapp: 662 114 241 or visit them on FB: AxarEnergy See main advert below
SALES & RENTALS We urgently Require Properties Tel: 952 52 41 40 Mob: 637 278 306 / 606 087 362 Calle Dr Fleming, 1 Nerja. 29780
Estate Agents!
Calle Pintor Cipriano Maldonado 7A TORRE DEL MAR Tel: 952 547 554 / 680 210 414
THIS SPACE FOR JUST 180 euros for the year!! Call: 664 210 468
info@buyahomespain.com www.buyahomespain.com Your specialists on the Axarquia Coast
C / Infante 23, Edif. Faro 1, bajo, TORRE DEL MAR Tel./Fax. 0034 / 952 54 70 76 Mobile: 658 93 31 87 e-mail: info@suissehome.com www.suissehome.com
Country and Village Houses For Sale
Office/Home: +34 952 55 77 33 Mobile: +34 606 010 580 unspoiltandalusia@gmail.com www.unspoiltandalusia.com
Cómpeta
Torrox
Torre del Mar
+34 952 51 61 78 +34 952 53 91 25 +34 952 54 18 86
www.andalucia4you.net
Email: contact@andalucia4you.net Tel: +34 952 72 08 32 634 35 70 26 Avda. Andalucía 125 Caleta de Vélez
Early to bed, Early to rise, Work like hell, And ADVERTISE! Laurence J. Peter
It doesn’t have to be expensive.
Listings from as little as 60 euros per year!! Call: 664 210 468
Email: sales@thesentinella.com
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Valentine Funnies
Halting Erosion Using Vetiver From Vetiver Spain
Our Nursery is open by appointment only depending on the current travel restrictions. We have Moringa seedlings, Organic Moringa powder and Comfrey plants. We also have some local trees and some exotic trees from Africa.
Vetiver is a rapid growing and non-invasive sterile clump grass with a height of 1-2 metres and a root system of 3-4 metres in depth. We have been providing Vetiver throughout the EU for almost 10 years now.
We are located in Sayalonga where we can plant year round but our best results by far start in February. The reason is that Vetiver is indigenous to India and Vetiver loves the heat of the summer. Use Vetiver cuttings as mulch around all of your fruit trees. Decomposing Vetiver improves soil quality, keeps the weeds down and the insects away all while helping to maintain soil moisture. Vetiver is a nutritious and replenishable animal fodder. Horses and pigs love it. We use it in our chicken pens replacing hay because it stops mites. In these 2 photos you will see land prepared for Vetiver and the results 2 years later.
We also use Vetiver along driveways and sidewalks. It also makes a great and inexpensive ornamental hedge Here is a link to a short video showing the results. https://youtu.be/rjTmb_LL2uo
We suggest planting now, as this is the BEST time of the year to plant.
To see more images of Vetiver go to this link. https://www.vetiverspain.org/photo-gallery.html Presently we have some specials, which include free shipping to numerous locations
For more information please contact us. Please visit us or visit our website: www.vetiverspain.com email: info@vetiverspain.com Telephone: (34) 692 288 657
Plumbing By Chris
Repairs - Replacements - Reforms
wTOILETS LEAKING? wGrab Rails
wDRIPPING TAPS? wBlocked Wastes
wSHOWER PROBLEMS? wWater Filters wReplaced/installed
wHOT WATER PROBLEMS?
wBathroom Ventilation - Solar Powered
Prevent Mould & Damp Free
ESTABLISHED IN 1982 Call Chris on: 674 617 379 NO CALL OuT FEE!
Mrs Carmen Silvia gallardo MuĂąoz-Cruzado & Team
Specialists in Property Law
Property Sales & Purchase
Wills & Inheritance
Tax Law (Resident & Non-Resident) Family Law
Conveyancing
TIE & Residency Applications
Vehicle Transfers/ Driving Licence Renewal
Social Security & Accountancy
Planning Issues & Legislation Translations - Insurance
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Celebrity Quotes
Even celebs say the stupidest of things at times… “Some people say that I must be a terrible person, but it’s not true. I have the heart of a young boy in a jar on my desk.” Stephen King “You are very squishy. So I shall name you squishy. And you shall be my little squishy.” Dory from finding Nemo
“Date Prince William? No, he's too... horsey.” Keira Knightley “They're a bit like chicken fillets really. You can hit people with them!” - talking about her temporary breast implants for Pirates. Keira Knightley “Middle age is when your age starts to show around your middle.” Bob Hope “A hippie is someone who looks like Tarzan, walks like Jane and smells like Cheetah.”
Ronald Reagan
“Commit the oldest sins, the newest kind of ways.” William Shakespeare
“I've had a wonderful evening, but this wasn't it.” Groucho Marx “I never think of the future - it comes soon enough.” Albert Einstein
“I've been on a calendar, but I've never been on time.” Marilyn Munroe
“Those of you in the cheaper seats clap your hands, those of you in the more expensive ones rattle your jewellery.” John Lennon “Political power grows out of the barrel of a gun.” Mao Tse Tung
TOTAL SATELLITE INSTALLATIONS WANT SATELLITE T.V CHANNELS? Have you lost BBC1, 2, 3, 4, ITV1, CH4, BBC News & BBC Radio ? THEN HAVE IT BACK THROUgH SATELLITE To move your own dish and supply a new Digibox - ONE OFF PRICE €280
UK IPTV
All uK channels including Sport & Films Catch up TV On Demand Movies
25€ per month Call Phil or Nigel on: 629 556 266 Email: totalsat@gmx.com
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Kestrel Counselling
57
Kestrel Counselling offers EMDR therapy,
can stop the process at any time. I support
Reprocessing), a different form of therapy
input is minimal. I trust the amazing brain of
(Eye Movement Desensitisation and
that focuses less on the event itself and
more on the emotions and symptoms that
result from the event.
and facilitate the healing process, but my
the client to heal itself, which the brain can do. Most people report EMDR as being a natural and empowering therapy.
Both sides of the brain are stimulated, using
EMDR enhances the natural healing ability of
knees or hands. EMDR was originally
with EMDR, I have helped clients cease to
either eye movement or tapping alternate developed to treat symptoms of PTSD,
(Posttraumatic Stress Disorder), but has been used successfully to treat anxiety, panic
the brain. In sessions with clients, working
have flashbacks, stop OCD behaviours and dealt with phobias.
attacks, depression, anger, phobias, sleep
For more information contact Kerry at
performance anxiety, low self esteem and
phone/whatsapp 0034 636 588 697
problems, grief and loss, addictions, pain, many other mental health issues.
Most of the time your body routinely manages new information and experiences without us
being aware of it. However, when the person experiences a traumatic event (eg: a car
accident) or repeated traumatic event (eg: childhood trauma), your natural coping
mechanism can be overloaded. This overload causes these experiences to be frozen in
your brain and they become ‘unprocessed’.
Often, when the memory is long forgotten, but the painful feelings such as anxiety, panic,
anger or despair are continually triggered in the present. EMDR helps create the
connections between brain’s memory
networks, enabling the brain to process the traumatic memory.
EMDR is not a form of hypnosis. The client
remains in control, fully alert and awake, and
kestrelcounselling@gmail.com or
See main advert below
Sales I Rentals I Management Do you want to sell your propert y? Despite COVID-19, the market is surprisingly buoyant We have Buyers ready to move
PLEASE CALL US NOW! Comares
For Sale
S2-429
Beautiful 2 Bed 2 Bath Country House (116m² built, 945m² plot), good access, panoramic 360º views. Living room, f/f kitchen, 2 double bedrooms, 2 bathrooms, office, second lounge
(or 3rd bedroom) with large terrace, great outdoor terraces & gardens, Jacuzzi and car port
Sales Price: 169,000¤ (NEW!)
Iznate
For Sale
S4-283
Stunning 4 Bed Townhouse located at the top of the village.
Accommodation: living room, 3 double bedrooms, a casita which
can be easily become a 4th bedroom, f/f kitchen/diner & a spacious bathroom. It has a very large terrace with the possibility of building a splash pool. Ideal for buyers wanting to enjoy the Spanish culture and the amazing views
Sales Price: 119,000¤ (MUST BE VIEWED!)
Calle Pintor Cipriano Maldonado 7A, (opposite bus station) TORRE DEL MAR - Tel: 952 547 554 or 680 210 414
Email: info@buyahomespain.com
Puente don Manuel
Sales I Rentals I Management For Sale S4-276
Very Spacious 4 Bed 2 Bath Villa (200m² built, 822m² plot). Ground Floor: large conservatory style, hallway lounge with fireplace, f/f kitchen, utility room, family bathroom, 2 beds.
Downstairs: 2 bed apartment with living room & arch to f/f kitchen & a garage. Luxurious outdoor covered entertainment area with kitchen, lounge, jacuzzi and dining area. Lots of parking
Sales Price: 279,950¤ (VERY SPACIOUS!) Comares
For Sale
S2-420
Lovely 2 Bed 2 Bath House (90m² built, 600m² plot), in a
hamlet near the village. Main house: living room, kitchen, bedroom & bathroom. Casita: a room that can be a living
room with a sofa bed, WC & kitchen area. There is a covered terrace and sunny roof terrace. Land with some fruit trees
Sales Price: 69,000¤ (NEW!) Cútar
For Sale
R1-142
Cute 1 Bed Village House, a 35-minute drive from the coast. It has been well reformed and the
house comprises 1 bedroom, 1 bathroom, living room, bathroom and a great roof terrace
Rental Price: 300¤ per month
w w w.buyahomespain.com
Enquire about our next FREE Legal Clinic
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Saucy Postcards
MODERN
VINTAGE
RuSTIC
ELEGANT
SHABBY
Quality Bespoke Wood Furniture Tables, benches, kitchen doors, work surfaces, bureaus, built-in wardrobes and more... Any size, colour or design for home, gardens and businesses. Constructed for stability and durability with a quality service you can trust
Tel: 679 171 008 woodworkwes
www.weswoodwork.com
PRACTICAL
STYLISH
MINIMALISTIC
CHIC
Your Design Brought to Life
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Andalucia Vastgoed Real Estate
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The team of Andalucía Real Estate wishes you an inspiring New year! 2020 is a year that we will not immediately forget, but it did give us new challenges.
During the last year, due to Covid-19, the hectic life of a real estate agent suddenly changed. Thanks to all the restrictive measures which were taken, we suddenly got less clients which gave us extra time to update our databases, contracts, website and blog. In short, the lock-down period was a time of fine-tuning everything that we would otherwise not have got around to doing. Due to our broad network of customers (we already have more than 16 years in real estate) we managed to sell several properties even during the lock-down period. These were mainly people who were looking for investments and bought new build projects in urbanizations. Another project that attracted more interest were houses located in the mountains. People started to realise the benefits of having a big plot of land far away from the busy cities where COVID numbers were peaking. Apart from the sales, we were still quite busy with reforms. For eg, we organised a complete makeover of a country property on behalf of an investor. We were given ‘carte blanche’ and were able to design, renovate and decorate the entire building to our taste.
You can see the result in our advert. (Ref. 21HC001) Another project, apart from the home staging one, were complete furnishings of apartments for clients who suddenly were not able to come to Spain anymore due to the local lock-down regulations. Meanwhile, we keep receiving a lot of requests from clients willing to buy a house in Spain. Most of them are now making appointments with us from March onwards, all hoping they will finally be able to travel again. Fingers crossed. So as you see, we have not been idle but have worked in good spirits on new challenges. It’s also partly thanks to our employees Arne (responsible for viewings) and Daphne (co-ordination and administration) that we can face and implement these new challenges. A team that is on the same wavelength and one which you can count on is an absolute must! Although there have been a lot of negative reports from the past year, we have managed to maintain the good vibes to take on new challenges! Let’s go on… www.andaluciarealestate.eu
See main adverts on pages 46 and 47
FEBRUARY ONLY 14kw P-Type Heater 1,699€ inc IVA
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PSG (Pool Services Group) - February Offer!
As we are now approaching the colder months, the main benefit of the heat pump is that with it you can extend the swimming season for a few months or the whole year.
The water in unheated pools drops as temperatures fall, on a steamynight in August, this might not be an issue, but the water can feel too cold other times of the year. Heating your pool gives you greater flexibility regarding the time of day and evening you and your guests can comfortably swim. A heat pump can save you up to 80% on operating costs. Our heat pumps are the best option when heating your pool since it is the most efficient COP system, in which you will achieve the greatest savings. There are many health benefits, one of which is swimming. It is a good exercise for people of all ages, because it provides a low impact aerobic workout. In fact, water aerobics is commonly suggested for older people and anyone with joint problems. A heated pool offers therapeutic benefits, helps relax sore muscles, and invites swimmers to enjoy exercising in the water for longer periods. There is no reason to settle for using your pool just a few months out of the year. By
heating your pool to your most comfortable water temperature, you can swim safely and comfortably even when temperatures start to fall. At PSG Pool Services Group we have varied winter offers now on many of our heat pumps, and during the month of February only, we have reduced the 14kw P Type to 1699â‚Ź inc. iva. For more information contact us at sales@poolservicesgroup.com See main adverts on the previous pages 62 and 63
14KW - P Type Reduced to 1699â‚Ź incl. IVA
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Items For Sale / Wanted
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I WILL COLLECT FREE of charge all your used clothing, bric-a-brac, pots and pans, books, toys, CD´s garden pots, tools, pieces of furniture or anything else you are throwing out whilst you are cleaning. Call me on 625 319 323 Jacqui
JOKE BOOK Oh My Good Gawld 2 Yours truely has put together the 2nd joke book containing 84 pages of solid jokes & funnies. No pictures, no spaces, just pure unadulterated laughter. 5€ Call: 664 689 138
GUITAR BOSS GT5 Digital Effects Pedal Unit. Good condition, hardly used 100€. For further details please call 620 196 559 or 634 340 080 or email: maggiesp.mm@gmail.com
FOR SALE
Grade 1 Levis 501 & 505 30€ Denim dungarees 30€ Sports jackets; Nike, Fila etc... 12.50€ American hoodie sweat shirts 12.50€ Phone Peter 696 857 401
NEW MEMBERS WANTED - EL CAPITAN TENNIS CLUB Torre Del Mar. Open to new members. For information Ring 623192294
Kia Cee’d 1.4 CRDI WgT Business. Manuel Gears, Diesel, 175,000km. VGC, ITV until 2022, Spanish plates, LHD
Price 5,500€ (including VAT) Tel: 637 452 480
TRAPICHE MARKET
Every Tuesday 9.30am - 1.30pm
Come and enjoy a relaxing morning at Los Jardines del Trapiche, THE nicest market venue on the Costa. HOPE TO SEE YOU SOON Please note that we will be obeying the restriction rules with this being the new norm. So come on down for one step further to normality!!
Take the A-272 turning onto the Velez-Malaga road A-356. Turn off at El Cruce restaurant towards Benamargosa. Over the roundabout and we are on the left just before the private airfield
Call Anita on: 627 877 164
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Sentinella Fables
5 lessons in life from yours truly…
Lesson 1: A man is getting into the shower just as his wife is finishing up her shower, when the doorbell rings. The wife quickly wraps herself in a towel and runs downstairs. When she opens the door, there stands Bob, the next-door neighbour. Before she says a word, Bob says, “I'll give you €800 to drop that towel.” After thinking for a moment, the woman drops her towel and stands naked in front of Bob, after a few seconds, Bob hands her €800 and leaves. The woman wraps back up in the towel and goes back upstairs. When she gets to the bathroom, her husband asks, “Who was that?” “It was Bob the next door neighbour,” she replies. “Great,” the husband says, “Did he say anything about the €800 he owes me?” Moral of the story: If you share critical information pertaining to credit and risk with your shareholders in time, you may be in a position to prevent avoidable exposure
Lesson 2: A priest offered a Nun a lift. She got in and crossed her legs, forcing her gown to reveal a leg. The priest nearly had an accident. After controlling the car, he stealthily slid his hand up her leg. The nun said, “Father, remember Psalm 129?” The priest removed his hand. But, changing gears, he let his hand slide up her leg again. The nun once again said, “Father, remember Psalm 129?” The priest apologised, “Sorry sister but the flesh is weak..” Arriving at the convent, the nun sighed heavily and went on her way. On his arrival at the church, the priest rushed to look up Psalm 129. It said, “Go forth and seek, further up, you will find glory.” Moral of the story: If you are not well informed in your job, you might miss a great opportunity. Lesson 3: A sales rep, an admin clerk and the manager
are walking to lunch when they find an antique oil lamp. They rub it and a Genie comes out. The Genie says, “I'll give each of you just one wish.” “Me first! Me first!” says the admin clerk. “I want to be in the Bahamas, driving a speedboat, without a care in the world.” Puff! She's gone. “Me next! Me next!” says the sales rep. “I want to be in Hawaii, relaxing on the beach with my personal masseuse, an endless supply of Pina Coladas and the love of my life.” Puff! He's gone. “OK, you're up,” the Genie says to the manager. The manager says, “I want those two back in the office after lunch.” Moral of the story: Always let your boss have the first say. Lesson 4: An eagle was sitting on a tree resting, doing nothing. A small rabbit saw the eagle and asked him, “Can I also sit like you and do nothing?” The eagle answered: “Sure, why not.” So, the rabbit sat on the ground below the eagle and rested. All of a sudden, a fox appeared, jumped on the rabbit and ate it. Moral of the story: To be sitting and doing nothing, you must be sitting very, very high up.
Lesson 5: A turkey was chatting with a bull. “I would love to be able to get to the top of that tree” sighed the turkey, “but I haven't got the energy.” “Well, why don't you nibble on some of my droppings?” replied the bull. “They're packed with nutrients.” The turkey pecked at a lump of dung, and found it actually gave him enough strength to reach the lowest branch of the tree. The next day, after eating some more dung, he reached the second branch. Finally, after a fourth night, the turkey was proudly perched at the top of the tree. He was promptly spotted by a farmer, who shot him out of the tree. Moral of the story: Bull s*** might get you to the top, but it won't keep you there.
Lunch menu 6.95€ Evening menu & weekends 7.95€ Special Dishes - Crispy Duck Orange Duck, Babi Pangang For Free specialist days in February Please call for details
Open 12.00-16.00 / 19.00-23.00 (Closed Mondays) Calle infante, 24 Torre del Mar (Thursday market road) Takeaway available Tel: 952 965 109 / 625 908 186
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Random Jokes :)
A taxi passenger tapped the driver on the shoulder to ask him a question. The driver screamed, lost control of the car, nearly hit a bus, went up on the footpath and stopped centimetres from a shop window. For a second everything went quiet in the cab, then the elderly driver turned and said 'Look son, don't ever do that again, you scared the daylights out of me!' The passenger apologised and said, 'I didn't realise that a little tap would scare you so much.'
CHEAP ALL YEAR ROUND ADVERTISING ONLY 60€ per year!!!
*exc. iva
FOR INFO CALL: 664 210 468 Email: sales@thesentinella.com www.thesentinella.com
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The driver replied, 'Sorry, it's not really your fault. I just retired and today is my first day as a cab driver...I've been driving a hearse for the last 45 years.' ------------------------------------------------------------A woman went into a post office to buy some stamps for her Christmas cards. ‘What denomination do you want?’ asked the lady at the counter. 'Good God!' she replied, ‘Has it come to this? I suppose you'd better give me twenty Catholic and twenty Presbyterian.’
Please mention The Sentinella Magazine When replying to adverts & shop local Thank you!
Plumbing and Tiling Axarquia
Slightly less able to climb in and out the bath? Why not remove the bath and install a luxury shower?
Folding shower seats - Anti-slip trays - Walk-in showers
30 years of 1st Class Installations Call / Whats-app / Text Chris on: 674 617 379 E-Mail: plumbingandtilingaxarquia@gmail.com
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Random Jokes :)
A man staggered into a hospital with concussion, multiple bruises, two black eyes, and a five iron wrapped tightly around his throat. Naturally, the Doctor asked him, "What happened to you?" "Well, I was having a quiet round of golf with my wife when, at a difficult hole, we both sliced our golf balls into a field of cattle. We went to look for them and while I was looking around I noticed one of the cows had something white at its rear end." "I walked over, lifted its tail, and sure enough, there was a golf ball with my wife's monogram on it - stuck right in the middle of the cow's fanny. Still holding the cow's tail up, I yelled to my wife, "Hey, this looks like yours!'" "I don't remember much after that." ------------------------------------------------------------Husband looks at his wife in surprise, "Wow darling, you look different and nice today! Is that a new hairdo?" The wife hisses from behind him, "I’m over
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here, Arnold!" ------------------------------------------------------------Doctor: You're obese. Patient: For that I definitely want a second opinion. Doctor: You’re quite ugly, too ------------------------------------------------------------A Japanese man in a monastery atop a sacred mountain asks the wise man: "Master Ayumu, why do all Westerners think that Japanese people look alike?" "I am not Master Ayumu." ------------------------------------------------------------Boy comes up to his father, all angry, "Dad, you remember how you told me to put a potato in my swimming trunks? How you said it would impress the girls?" Father looks up, smiling, "Yeah, did it work?" The boy screams, "You could have mentioned that the potato goes in the front!" ------------------------------------------------------------How can you tell your acne is really starting to get out of hand? - The blind start reading your face
Businesses Chatelin ortopedia & pedicurist practice They are a company with over 30 years experience in the orthopedic sector. Linda is a qualified pedicurist and Henry is a certified prothesis and orthesis maker, for all your inlays and sport inlays, corset-knee, ankle and wrist supports, wheelchairs, walking aids, beds, rehabilitation articles etc...open Monday - Thursday 10am 2pm and 3pm - 6pm. call: 695 481 082 or 658 773 857
Starcar in Nerja for all your car repair needs: bodywork painting, service, pre I.T.V. check, air-conditioning, tyres, brakes, clutch etc. Also car transfers. Find them at Avda Alcalde Antonio Villasclaras just up from the BP garage as you are leaving Nerja on the right hand side and they are below the gym. Call Jonathan who speaks English on 637 801 325 Dentadanés Dental Clinic offer top-quality Scandinavian dental care at competitive prices, a successful concept that has been used since the clinic was established in Maro (Nerja) in 1991. We have two dentists, (one Danish female, one English male) ready to solve all your dental problems. Please visit our website at www.dentadanes.com for a full list of treatments & prices as well as directions to and pictures of the clinic. Open Monday to Friday 10am - 5pm including all summer months. We speak English, Danish/Scandinavian, German and Spanish. Tel: 952 52 96 66. wHoliday & Winter Rentals wEnglish, French and Spanish Speaking w1 to 3 Bedroom Apartments & Villas
wBooking via WhatsApp, Facebook or Website
Visit our website: www.nerjabeachholidays.com to view our range of properties and enjoy our Virtual Tour Contact Karine: +34 644 793 168 Email: admin@nerjabeachholidays.com
CHATELIN ORTOPEDIA & FULLY QUALIFIED PEDICURIST wCorsets & knee, ankle and wrist supports
High Level Pedicurist
General care and advice wFor all inlays (inc. Sports) for gorgeous feet, because we care about your feet as much as you do! wWheelchairs, walking aids & beds MORE than just a pedicure, wRehabilitaion articles, etc. look good, FEEL gREAT!! Opening Hours: Monday - Thursday 10am - 2pm / 3pm - 6pm Calle la Cruz, 60 Nerja Tel: 695 481 082 or 658 773 857 Email: henrychatelin@hotmail.com
In
Nerja
Do you need some expert advice in Holiday Accommodation? Nerja Beach Holidays are waiting to do just this! Visit their properties directly via their Virtual tour on www.nerjabeachholidays.com. They offer all kinds of holiday and winter rentals. They speak English, French and Spanish to help you along the way. They have an extensive range of 1 to 3 bed apartments and villas. Booking can be made via Whatsapp, FB, Website, Email or phone. Nerja Beach Holidays have it all covered! Contact Karine +34 644 793 168 / admin@nerjabeachholidays.com
Erica is very excited to announce that she has moved her hair salon from Torrox Costa to Nerja! She will be working alonside Walli&Ron and will be welcoming new clients and hoping that all of her old ones will continue coming. The team salon is looking forward to seeing you all soon. A BIG THANK YOU TO YOU ALL!!! We are having such a lovely time working together and we are taking care of each other in this uncertain situation we are living in. Let’s face the future with joy, fun and GOOD HAIR!!!! Calle Almirante Ferråndiz 10 (Cristo) Nerja. (Down the passage in front of the Coviran Supermarket - the Post Office street. Call: 952 523 966 La llave de oro, Calle Granada 88, Nerja, 952 524 651. Locksmith 24hrs emergency service, 606 939 929, opening & repairing safes, armoured doors, authorised technical service, key cutting, supplier for quality padlocks, safes & other security products.
incorporating
Stylists
Calle Cristo 10, NERJA (Post office street) (down side in front of Coviran Supermarket) Tel: 952 23 966 - Mob: 610 876 127
LOCKSMITH
Home Service covering all Axarquia
Calle granada, 88 NERJA Tel: 952 52 4651
24 HOURS 606 939 929
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Community Owners’
Even if you are licensed by the Local Council...
of ownership and without prejudice to third
party)�, but does not legitimise the works on its own, nor is the community bound by the
fact that the Administration has authorised it. Therefore, the owner intending to make works that affect or may affect common elements
must ask the community for prior permission (even if licensed), and the community may refuse authorisation. Everyone must be aware that if these works are executed
Building Works:
When the owner of a home or premises
intends to make works, doubts may arise as
without Community permission, their removal may be required.
CONCLUSION:
to the strength of the administrative license
Even if a work is licensed, the community
of the community.
elements.
(issued by the Local Council) of works in front All building works must be authorised by
Local councils. However, if the work affects common elements of the estate, it also
requires community authorisation, even if it
has all administrative permits and licenses. The license issued by the local council only indicates that the works are legal with the
required administrative regulations (therefore, the licenses are granted “except for the right
must also authorise it if it affects common For any advice or enquiry about
communities or horizontal property law, do not hesitate to contact us. Axarquia Solicitors
mail@axarquiasolicitors.com Tel. 952 901 225
See main advert opposite
ILM SERVICES
(incorporating NB Construction & SH Services)
YOUR ONE STOP SHOP FOR ALL BUILDING OR MAINTENANCE PROJECTS w
REFORMS
w POOLS
w
KITCHENS
w GARDENS
w
BATHROOMS
w RENTAL MANAGEMENT
w
PLUMBING
w CLEANING
w ELECTRICS (INC. BOLETINES) w
w DAMP SOLUTIONS
PAINTING (INTERIOR & EXTERIOR)
Specialist work carried out by Qualified and Experienced people with a Commitment to QUALITY ILM is British/Spanish owned and has been serving the Axarquia region for over 20 years!
Tel: 620 678 240 (English & Spanish) 681 232 275 (Spanish) / 952 117 421 Email: simonmjhobson@yahoo.es
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& t i Fru Factsl Veg enne F
Fennel is a vegetable from the parsley family. It is white-green in colour, and bulb-like in its shape with green stems
An aromatic herb that originated in the Mediterranean region and has many culinary and medicinal uses.
Fennel is a good source of folate, the naturally occurring form of folic acid, which is needed for healthy red blood cell formation as well as being important in pregnancy. A 100g serving of fennel provides around 20% of the recommended daily allowance for adults, or 10% of your intake if you’re pregnant or trying to conceive.
Fennel been used for many years as a medicinal plant for a wide range of conditions related to digestive, endocrine, reproductive, and respiratory systems and as a milk stimulant for lactating mothers. One cup of raw fennel slices contains just 27 calories, with nearly 3 grams of fibre.
One cup of fennel bulb contains almost 20 percent of the daily requirement of vitamin C, making it quite a rich source of this beneficial vitamin of our diet. It is a common practice, particularly in the Indian Subcontinent, to chew fennel seeds after meals. This has been done for many years as it is thought to facilitate digestion and to eliminate bad breath.
Fennel is very popular as an antiflatulent, due to the carminative properties of the aspartic acid found in it.
Fennel seeds in powdered form, is thought to act as a laxative. Fennel is also commonly found in medicines that treat abdominal pain, diarrhea, irritable bowel syndrome
Like celery, the entire fennel plant is edible. This mildly licorice-flavored plant is delicious and can be cooked in various ways. You can add fennel to salads, slaws, pastas and soups, it can be grilled, roasted or sauteed.
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s Fact
ss e l e Us ntine ey are us!eless Vale As alwaybsutthamazing
Valentine’s Day is a $14.7 billion industry in the U.S.
Worldwide, over 50 million roses are given for Valentine's Day each year. The only other day that beats Valentine’s Day in floral sales is Mother’s Day. Approximately 27 percent of those who buy flowers on Valentine's Day are women. Only 73% are men.
On Valentine`s Day every year, there are at least 36 million heart shape boxes of chocolates sold.
Women tend to buy approximately 85% of all the Valentine`s Day cards sold.
On Valentine`s Day, 1876, Alexander Graham Bell applied for his telephone patent. At least 9 million people buy their pets a gift on Valentine`s Day.
In the Middle Ages, men and women picked names to see who their Valentine would be. They would wear the name pinned to their sleeve for a week so that everyone would know their ‘supposed’ true feelings about that person.This is where the saying: ‘Where your heat on your sleeve,’ came from.
On Valentine’s Day 2010, 39,897 people in Mexico City broke the record for the world’s largest group kiss.
Cupid is said to be the symbol of valentines. Cupid is the son of Venus. Venus is the Roman god of love and beauty. Teachers receive the most Valentine’s Day cards, followed by kids, mothers, wives and girlfriends.
Richard Cadbury invented the first Valentines Day candy box in the late 1800s. In 2015, 18% of women sent themselves flowers.
HEATINg - COOLINg - SOLAR - HEAT PUMPS SALES - SERVICE - MAINTENANCE Constant climates using the latest inverter technology Covering all the Axarquia region
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Quality!!
Wouldn’t you love to say these to someone?
Never go to bed angry... stay up and plot your revenge! Did you eat an extra bowl of stupid this morning?
I don’t know what your problem is but I bet it is hard to pronounce.
If you have something to say raise your hand and place it over your mouth. You’re not yourself today... I noticed the improvement immediately.
Everyone seems normal until you get to know them! Life is too short to dance with ugly men.
Men....tal
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Men & Political Correctness. How to speak about men and be politically correct
1) He does not have a beer gut. He has developed a liquid storage facility. 2) He does not get lost. He investigates alternative destinations. 3) He is not balding. He is in follicle regression.
4) He does not get falling down drunk. He becomes accidentally horizontal 5) He is not a male chauvinist pig. He has swine empathy. 6) He is not afraid of commitment. He is monogamously challenged.
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Film
w e i v Re
Mr
lme o H
s
15 (2 0
)
Director: Bill Condon Writers: Mitch Cullin (novel), Jeffrey Hatcher (screenplay) Stars: Ian McKellen, Laura Linney, Milo Parker, Hiroyuki Sanada, Frances Barber Running time: 1hr 44 mins, certificate PG Viewing: Amazon and Netflix Starring the great actor Sir Ian McKellen as the man himself, the film also showcases the emerging talent of Milo Parker, whose performance earned him a clutch of nominations, including for the British Independent Film Awards 2015 Most Promising Newcomer.
The story is set in two time zones. Holmes, now 93, physically frail and suffering from dementia, is becoming increasingly confused and frustrated that his memory is failing him. With his great friend and colleague Dr
Watson having married and subsequently died, Holmes has retreated from the world at large. He now lives in a remote rural farmhouse, cared for by widowed housekeeper Mrs Munro (Laura Linney) and her young son Roger (Milo Parker), and spends his time looking after his beloved bees. He is aided by willing pupil Roger, who keeps urging Holmes to return to detection. Discovering that John Watson had constructed a “fictional” ending to Holmes’ last-ever case, which had ended in tragic circumstances and prompted the detective’s retirement, Holmes resolves to try and solve it now. He is also haunted by the memory of a mysterious woman, but unfortunately, his memory repeatedly fails him and it is only with the help of Roger that the truth finally emerges. The original tale is told via flashbacks to the actual events of 30 years ago, interspersed with his struggles and events in the present day. There is also an intriguing sub-plot, set in the more recent past, which involves a mysterious Japanese businessman and his late father. I found the stories cleverly constructed and thoroughly entertaining, and the acting quality throughout is superb. Star Rating ****/*****
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Fun
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cs i P ny
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Recipe Of The Month - Hidden Heart Cake
Ingredients For the cake 2 x 175g unsalted butter, softened 2 x 175g golden caster sugar 6 large eggs 2 x 140g self-raising flour, sifted 2 x ½ tsp baking powder 3 tbsp cocoa powder 2 x 85g ground almond 2 x 100ml milk 3 tsp vanilla extract 28ml bottle red food colouring or ½ tsp red food colouring gel For the icing 100ml double cream 200g dark chocolate, finely chopped 50g unsalted butter pink sprinkles (optional)
1. Heat oven to 160C/140C fan/gas 3. Grease a 900g loaf tin and line with a long strip of baking parchment. Cream 175g butter and 175g sugar until light and fluffy. Beat 3 of the eggs and pour in, a little at a time, mixing after each addition. Sift together 140g flour, 1⁄2 tsp baking powder and the cocoa, then fold into the butter mixture along with the almonds. Combine 100ml milk, 11⁄2 tsp vanilla and all the food colouring and add to the batter, then mix until evenly coloured.
2 .Pour into the prepared loaf tin and bake for 1 hr 10 mins until a skewer comes out clean.
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Cool for 10 mins in the tin, then transfer to a wire rack. When cool, cut the cake into 4cm slices. Using a 5cm cutter, stamp out the hearts.
3. Repeat step 1 to make a second cake mixture – you won’t have cocoa or food colour in this batch. Pour 3⁄4 of the mixture into the prepared loaf tin. Push the bottoms of the hearts into the batter in a tightly packed row. Spoon over the remaining cake mixture, covering as much of the hearts as possible. bake for 1 hr or until a skewer comes out clean. Cool for 10 mins in the tin, then transfer to a wire rack to cool completely.
4. For the icing, gently heat all the ingredients over a low heat until combined. Leave to cool, then chill until needed. Spread over the cooled cake and decorate with the sprinkles, if using. Will keep for 3 days stored in a cake tin.
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Bad luck!
How to tell if it is going to be a rotten day
1. You wake up face down on the pavement. 2. You put your bra on backward and it fits better.
8. Your twin sister forgot your birthday.
9. You wake up and discover your water bed broke and then realise that you don't have a water bed.
3. You call Suicide Prevention and they put you on hold.
10. Your car horn goes off accidentally and remains stuck as you follow a group of Hell's Angels on the motorway.
5. Your birthday cake collapses from the weight of the candles.
12. Your boss tells you not to bother to take off your coat.
4. You see a "60 Minutes" news team waiting in your office.
6. You want to put on the clothes you wore home from the party last night, and there aren't any.
7. You turn on the news and they're showing emergency routes out of the city.
ADVERTISE HERE
If you are a business owner and reading this, then so are your
POTENTIAL CUSTOMERS!!!
Contact us for details 664 210 468
Email: sales@thesentinella.com
11. Your wife wakes up feeling amorous and you have a headache.
13. The bird singing outside your window is a buzzard. 14. You wake up and your braces are locked together.
Trasteros AXARQUIA
SELF STORAGE AXARQUIA
Written contract 24 hour security & access Video surveillance Rentals starting at 30 days
How much space do you want to add to your life? Rooms of: 3 1m - 2m3 - 4m3 - 6m3
Rental & Reservations: Call: 646 739 117 info@trasterosaxarquia.com C/ Axarquia 1, Vélez-Málaga 29700, Málaga
The Sentinella Bargain Boxes From just 15 euros per month +IVA Call: 664 210 468
Alcalá Transport
Providing Man & Van service to and from the UK twice a month (two vans) wReferences available wCommercial & private work wFull & part loads wNo obligation quotes w10 years working in Spain wFully insured, Spanish registered company
Call Colin on 608 085 700 or 0044 7936 886 822 Email: alcalamav@gmail.com
English dental Technician 30 years experience Fully Qualified Denture Repairs Adjustments / Duplications Based in Torrox Pueblo We can visit if needed Call graham for confidential advice on any denture problem on: 952 539 219 / 633 157 891
DENTIST Dr Bakri
*Dental Cosmetics *Implants Crowns & Bridges
Algarrobo Costa Tel: 952 55 05 21
Torrox Costa Tel: 952 53 20 12
Emergencies: 678 974 892
FO R AL L Y O UR B UI LD IN g R E QU IR E M E NT S Reforms, Terracing, Bathrooms, Kitchens, Electrical works, Plastering & Damp Proofing. Free no obligation quotes. Very competitive prices. Visit our website for more information and testimonials from previous customers.
rob@platinumbuildingservices.net www.platinumbuildingservices.net
Te l : 66 5 3 2 2 1 36 - 9 52 5 39 42 3
CHIMNEY SWEEP
FOR A PROFESSIONAL CHIMNEY SWEEPING & MAINTENANCE SERVICE CALL CHIMNEY CARE
BE SAFE
Be safe, have your chimney inspected and cleaned before you use your fire this winter
Tel Russ: 654 184 242
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Ordering A Pizza In 2022!
So much truth in this seeing what’s going on at the moment!
CALLER: “Is this Pizza Hut?” gOOgLE: “No sir, it's Google Pizza.” CALLER: “I must have dialed a wrong number, sorry.” gOOgLE: “No sir, Google bought Pizza Hut last month.” CALLER: “OK. I would like to order a pizza.” gOOgLE: “Do you want your usual, sir?” CALLER: “My usual? You know me?” gOOgLE: “According to our caller ID data sheet, the last 12 times you called you ordered an extra-large pizza with three cheeses, sausage, pepperoni, mushrooms and meatballs on a thick crust.” CALLER: “Super! That’s what I’ll have.” gOOgLE: “May I suggest that this time you order a pizza with ricotta, arugula, sun-dried tomatoes and olives on a whole wheat gluten-free thin crust?” CALLER: “What? I don’t want a vegetarian pizza!” gOOgLE: “Your cholesterol is not good, sir.” CALLER: “How the hell do you know that?” gOOgLE: “Well, we cross-referenced your home phone number with your medical records. We have the result of your blood tests for the last 7 years.” CALLER: “Okay, but I do not want your rotten vegetarian pizza! I already take medication for my cholesterol.” gOOgLE: “Excuse me sir, but you have not taken your medication regularly. According to our database, you purchased only a box of 30 cholesterol tablets once at Lloyd's Pharmacy, 4 months ago.” CALLER: I bought more from another Pharmacy. GOOGLE: “That doesn’t show on your credit card statement.” CALLER: “I paid in cash.” GOOGLE: “But you did not withdraw enough cash according to your bank statement.” CALLER: “I have other sources of cash.”
GOOGLE: That doesn’t show on your latest tax returns, unless you bought them using an undeclared income source, which is against the law!” CALLER: “WHAT THE HELL!?!!” GOOGLE: “I'm sorry sir, we use such information only with the sole intention of helping you.” CALLER: “Enough! That's enough! I'm sick to death of Google, Facebook, Twitter, WhatsApp and all the others. I'm going to an island without the internet, TV, where there is no phone service and no one to watch me or spy on me.” GOOGLE: “I understand sir, but you need to renew your passport first. It expired 6 weeks ago...” Welcome to the future!!!
The Sentinella Bargain Boxes This size from just 15 euros per month +IVA Call: 664 210 468
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Baby Lampard Loose Women star Christine Lampard has shared the happy news that she's pregnant with her second child with husband Frank Lampard. The delighted ITV star, 41, shared a picture of herself on social media cradling her bump, and wrote: "A new year and a new baby on the way for the Lampards! It’s been a strange and worrying time to be pregnant but we’re hoping and praying that cuddles from family and friends are not too far off. Sending all my love to everyone going through pregnancy during this crazy time." Christine, who regularly appears on Loose Women and covers for Lorraine Kelly on daytime TV, already has daughter Patricia Charlotte Lampard with Chelsea manager Frank. She is also step mum to Frank's other two children Luna and Isla from a previous relationship. Farewell to Facebook Prince Harry and Meghan Markle have reportedly quit social media after being bombarded with abuse online. The Duke and Duchess of Sussex have apparently turned their backs on Twitter and Facebook after becoming alienated by the 'hate' they found online. Meghan has previously shared her horror at the 'almost unsurvivable' abuse she faced while on maternity leave with Archie. The royal couple also have 'no plans' to use social media for their Archewell Foundation, The Times reports. They have not posted on their Sussex Royal Instagram profile, which has more than 10 million followers, since last March.
Scarlett’s mum in gambling hell Scarlett Moffatt's mum Betty lifted 'thousands' from her daughter's accounts in a desperate bid to fund her own online gambling addiction. The 50-year-old Gogglebox star, who has worked as Scarlett's manager since her daughter won I'm A Celebrity... Get Me Out Of Here! in 2016, stole thousands of pounds from the bank accounts as her habit spiralled
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out of control during the first lockdown. Keeping the extent of her illness from Scarlett, Betty continued lifting money from her daughter's pot, each time believing she'd be able to pay it all back with a big win. But when her luck failed to change, Betty was forced to come clean to Scarlett and expose what she'd been doing after Scarlett grew concerned about what had happened to her bank balance. A source close to the family, who first found fame on Channel 4's Gogglebox, said the confession left Scarlett "betrayed and confused". "But once Betty broke down and explained what had happened Scarlett couldn't have been more supportive," the insider told the Sun. The name’s Bond …? Bridgerton star Rege-Jean Page has responded to James Bond casting rumours. With Daniel Craig ready to hang up his tuxedo, the door could be left wide open for the actor who plays dashing Simon Basset to stroll through and pick up the 007 mantle. Speculation is already rife that he might trade in his period drama costume for a tuxedo to portray James Bond. The hunky 31-year-old actor plays brooding Simon Basset, Duke of Hastings, in the Netflix hit drama – which has been thrilling TV fans. In the past couple of weeks, Regé-Jean has become the name on everybody’s lips when it comes to speculating who should next portray the MI6 spy on the big screen. During a recent appearance on America’s late night talkshow Tonight with Jimmy Fallon, he said he was honoured to be in the same conversation as a string of other high profile actors who have all been rumoured to be in the 007 running – including Marvel superhero star Idris Elba, romcom hunk Henry Golding and Hollywood heartthrob Tom Hardy.
OUR BILINGUAL TEAM ARE HERE TO HELP YOU Opening hours: 09.00 to 14.00
Indian Cuisine
Delicious food at the Best Venue on the Promenade in Torre del Mar
Use the link below to view menu or scan QR code https://www.movilmenu.com/indus/29740
Call: 631 080 785
Please note: Hours subject to change due to possible Covid restrictions. Please check in advance
OPEN 13.00 - 16.00 EVERY DAY TORRE DEL MAR (opposite Yacht Club)
Indus Chef Spice Torre del Mar
ULTRA CLEAN
Apartment - Townhouse - Villa
CLEAN & CHANGEOVERS
Key holding - Laundry - Gardening - Meet & Greet
Torre del Mar Pammy: 674 597 984
Persianas / Shutters Repairs - Replacements
IZZI&CAPELLI Torre del Mar The Hair Experts
Find us on facebook @IZZICAPELLI
Telephone: 952 965 646 or 685 430 621
wSLATS DAMAGED? wBROKEN CORDS? wMOTOR PROBLEMS?
wSHUTTERS NOT OPENING OR CLOSING?
Volunteers Wanted English Speaking Email: 29094social@cruzroja.es
Established 1982
Call Chris on: 674 617 379 NO CALL OuT FEE!
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New Challenges For Brits In Spain
It grieves me to talk about Brexit... I hope not to write about it again. But I have seen that there has been a lot of confusion amongst British citizens seeking to buy in Spain in the rather inhospitable post-Brexit world. But gradually, the rules are becoming clearer. So here is a brief summary:
- If you have a holiday home here, or are buying one, but are resident in the UK, you can still come over. As long as you don’t spend more than 90 days here in a period of 180 days, you will be OK. For the majority, that is about the maximum a holiday home owner would spend here, so spread your visits carefully to get the maximum benefit. So in theory that is 180 days a year, but spread out into 90 days in each half year. No visa will be required. Make sure you have more than 6 months left on your passport and health/travel insurance. - If you have a holiday home but are contemplating retiring in Spain, you will need to become a resident when you arrive permanently. You need to be earning 27,000€ per year, each, plus extra for each additional
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householder. You will also need to have private health cover and no criminal record. Also, you will need to change your driving licence for a Spanish one.
- If you are going to work in Spain, you need to have an employment contract from a Spanish company. Entrepreneurs wishing to set up a business here? You need all of the above, plus a business plan. So it is possible, but complicated.
My fear is that it will now only be the well-off who will be able to enjoy a retirement here. Is it really possible that those who voted for ‘freedom’ and ‘sovereignty’ did not stop and think that life might not be so free and easy if we opted out of the EU? But maybe many who voted to remove the UK from one of the most prestigious and influential union of nations in the world, had no intention of spending time ‘abroad’ anyway, and not a care for those who did. By Toni Waterman, Unspoilt Andalusia (see advertisement below)
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Joke Book - Out Now!
Oh My Good Gawld 2 At last!!! Sorry for the wait! Yours truely has put together the 2nd joke book containing 84 pages of solid jokes & funnies. No pictures, no spaces, just pure unadulterated laughter.
Can You Help CAS?
The Costa Animal Society (CAS) is always in need of more volunteer helpers in a number of areas so if you have spare time to fill, please make contact! In particular, we are currently seeking someone or ones who can help with fundraising and social media promotion. In addition, fosterers are always required to take short-term care of animals until a permanent home can be found. CAS will provide fosterers with all they need: food, medicine, bedding, leads, etc., as well as advice at any time. Even if you are only here for few months a year, CAS would appreciate your help. For general enquires contact 601 629 938.
Priced at just a fiver!
Available at the Tuesday Trapiche Market or email: tonyknight13@yahoo.co.uk or call 664 689 138
Money is always needed to cope with the continuous flow of abandoned dogs and cats requiring help from the Costa Animal Society. If you could donate a little to help or consider becoming a member of CAS, we and the animals would be most grateful. Bank: Cajamar Account Name: Costa Animal Society Account Number: 3058 0728 03 2720100283 BIC-Swift Code: CCRIES2A Thank you
Please mention The Sentinella when responding to adverts Name puns we'd all like to see
Puntastic!
1. If Yoko Ono married Sonny Bono, she'd be Yoko Ono Bono.
2. If Dolly Parton married Salvador Dali, she'd be Dolly Dali.
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10. If Snoop Doggy Dogg married Winnie the Pooh, he'd be Snoop Doggy Dogg Pooh. 11. How about a baseball marriage? If Boog Powell married Felipe Alou, he'd be Boog Alou.
3. If Bo Derek married Don Ho, she'd be Bo Ho.
4. If Oprah Winfrey married Deepak Chopra, she'd be Oprah Chopra.
5. If Cat Stevens married Snoop Doggy Dogg (Hey! Now everything is possible!) he'd be Cat Doggy Dogg. (see below) 12. If G. Gordon Liddy married Boutros-Boutros Ghali, then divorced him to marry Kenny G, he'd be G. Ghali G.
13. Nog (Quark's nephew on "Star Trek: Deep Space Nine") has no other name, so he uses it twice when getting a marriage license. If he married Howard Hughes, and then Pamela Dare, he'd be Nog Nog Hughes Dare. 14. If Shirley Jones married Tom Ewell, then Johnny Rotten, then Nathan Hale, she'd be Shirley Ewell Rotten Hale.
6. If Olivia Newton-John married Wayne Newton, then divorced him to marry Elton John, she'd be Olivia Newton-John Newton John.
7. If Sondra Locke married Elliott Ness, then divorced him to marry Herman Munster, she'd become Sondra Locke Ness Munster. 8. If Bea Arthur married Sting, she'd be Bea Sting.
9. If Liv Ullman married Judge Lance Ito, then divorced him and married Jerry Mathers, she'd be Liv Ito Beaver.
15. If Jack Handy (SNL writer) married Andy Capp, then married Jack Paar, then moved on to Stephen King, he'd be Jack Handy Capp Paar King. 16. If Woody Allen married Natalie Wood, divorced her and married Gregory Peck, divorced him and married Ben Hur, he'd be Woody Wood Peck Hur.
17. If Dolly Parton married Tommy Smothers, then went even further back in show business and married Mr. Lucky, then divorced and married Martin Short, then divorced and married football kicker Ray Guy, we could all nod understandingly when we heard, "Dolly Parton Smothers Lucky Short Guy."
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Where Is It?
Where’s Wally’s Willy?
Last month’s answer on page 99
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Prosecco: A Joy Of Life
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There are many producers of sparkling, aromatic, prosecco wine. For this quest I searched for a company that produces a range of high-quality prosecco wines, with impressive bottle presentations. Bottega has a very interesting history, both during the 20th century and into the 21st century. The eye-catching bottles and a great number of the wines are award-winning. The bottles are created by artisan crafts people and are really distinguishable. From their prosecco range I found the following to be very impressive.
Again, a fruity bouquet prevails, which leads, enticingly, to the wonderful mouthfeel. The palate is treated to a sensation that is impressively pleasant and memorable. The glamour of the bottle presentation adds to the pleasures of this production, which is extremely popular for special occasions and also makes a really wonderful gift.
Bottega Poeti Prosecco (DOC) is fresh, fragrant and has a floral bouquet. This wine is a very popular, dry production and favoured by many. Bottega Valdobbiadene Prosecco Superiore (DOCG) Extra Dry is another poets’ wine which is also very popular. Having a brilliant straw-yellow colour, too, this fresh and fragrant wine graces many dining occasions, regularly. Bottega Prosecco (DOC) Biologico Extra Dry is often chosen and has many devotees. This organic production is, again, a brilliant straw-yellow colour. Very fine, fresh, fruity and delicate is how I would describe this, much sought-after, prosecco. Bottega Prosecco (DOC) Fundum I found to be a splendid dry production, that has plenty of fruits, to please. The mouthfeel and palate sensation is fresh, with a good finish. Gold Poeti Prosecco (DOC) is a further very classy production from Bottega. Fresh, aromatic and very impressive, this wine comes in a magnificent gold-coloured bottle.
including grappa, plus liqueurs, along with a range of other products, are all made with much knowledge, love and devotion, so the finished Bottega productions are of the highest quality and quite exceptional.
Prosecco wines, having a persistent and fine perlage, are perfect for apĂŠritifs and excellent to pair with starters, also fish, seafood and white meats. Prosecco and other wines,
www.bottegaspa.com
As Always, Enjoy! Trevor Langley
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es Chariti
What´s on in your area?
Volunteers needed. The Costa Animal Society needs your help, particularly with their efforts at the Sunday car boot markets in Nerja and Almuñecar. If you have some time, and especially if you own a 4x4 or other large vehicle, your assistance in transporting and selling goods on a Sunday morning would be much appreciated as both these markets help raise much needed funds to care for rescued animals. If you can assist CAS in any way call Wendy: 660271984 or Vera: 680 315880.
SEEKING CHARITIES - People helping People Do you know of any SPANISH Charities (O.N.G) who help people and are seeking funding? The American International Club is currently seeking Spanish Organisations who are seeking assistance. If you are aware of an organisation that assists Spanish people, please send an email with contact information to nerjaclub@yahoo.com
The American International Club is a social club open to all nationalities which spans the area from Almunecar to Torrox and beyond. Activities include tapas runs, monthly excursions, petanque, coffee mornings, dinners and walks. The Club raises funds for Spanish charities and each year makes a significant donation to a local organisation as a way of saying "thank you" to our host nation. Our motto is "If it isn't fun, we don't do it". To join in the fun email: nerjaclub@yahoo.com http://www.americaninternationalclub.com Los Romanes Royal British Legion. Los Romanes branch has two venues. We meet weekly at The Asador Restaurant Puente Don Manuel, on Mon 12.00 – 1400 hrs. And on a Wed at midday at the Bar La Vega, Torre Del Mar. Our friendly group get together not only to raise funds for and support TRBL in Spain, but also meet to be with friends and have some fun, including quizzes, bingo, monthly lunches etc. You do not have to have served in the Armed Forces to become a member. Interested? Then please Phone Branch Secretary Sue on 691 544 140 or just pop in for a chat.
Furniture shop, Torre del Mar is looking for volunteers who have a free morning or afternoon every week to help us to sell second hand furniture and attend to customers in the new store. Would you like to help us? Contact 952564910/671048304 voluntariado@cudeca.org PIPPA’S PAWPRINTS CHARITY SHOP Calle Antonio Jimenez No. 4b, behind the Bus Station and the Notary. Cards, bric-a-brac, bags, shoes and quality clothing at knock-down prices. Now open from Tues to Sat 10.30am - 2pm. 622574174
Date Diasr For y
Every 2nd Wednesday in the month AAR monthly quiz at La Tasca. 3pm start. Opposite the police station, Torre del Mar. Call Shelia for details 640 328 051 Every Tuesday is Tony’s Bingo Quiz at The Belvedere at 3pm in Torre del Mar. Come along for a great fun night! Call 610 100 908 to reserve a table. Every Thursday Quiz at Bar Samba 3pm
Every Tuesday Country Farmers Market between 10am and 1.30pm. Los Jardines del Trapiche Call: Anita 627 877 164 Argentine Tango classes in Torrox: Wed 5pm 6pm Salón Pilates con Lorena Calle Deire, edificio fantasia, sótano 2 derecha, Torrox pueblo Mario Correa 649 59 55 94 mac1710@gmail.com
Scottish Country Dance Classes Every Tuesday evening from 7.15pm - 9pm at El Trapiche Restaurant, for all levels, with or without partners. For further information please contact George Bain on 619 069 966
The Nerja Players meet on 1st and 3rd Tues of the month between Oct and Apr. Perfomances are rehearsed readings. Calle Castilla Perez 1, Nerja. Look for the very large BLUE entrance door. We are between Salon de Juegos and a Supermarket. Reservations on our website. Email: admin@thenerjaplayers.com
Move It To Music! dance fitness classes take place Saturdays at 11am annually from mid October to Easter, at Nerja’s Millenium Wellness Center in Pasaje Milenio 3 (just off the far entrance to Carabeo car park). Gentle exercise and simple dance moves set to catchy pop tunes. Ideal for beginners and very popular with the 50-plus age group. Enquiries: WhatsApp/tel 675 846 217 / moveittomusic@yahoo.co.uk
Fellowship of Jesus Christ the King Whether you live in, or are visiting the Nerja area, we would be delighted to welcome you to the Fellowship of Jesus Christ The King. Our meetings are characterised by uplifting songs and relevant sermons and a modern but reverent service. Why not come along to praise God and meet and make new friends, Every Sun at 11am. Prayer Meetings are on Wed at 11am Pasaje San Miguel, Nerja, Email: fojctk@gmail.com www.facebook.com/FOJCTK Please check to see if events are taking place
10,9 Top ,8
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The Top Ten Biggest Pharmaceutical Settlements in History... 1. GlaxoSmithKline $3 billion - 2012 2. Pfizer $2.3 billion - 2009 3. Johnson & Johnson $2.2 billion - 2013 4. Abbott $1.5 billion 2012 5. Eli Lilly $1.42 billion 2009 6. Merck $950 million - 2011 7. Amgen $762 million - 2012 8. AstraZeneca $520 million - 2010 9. Actelion $360 million - 2018
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2. Turmeric 3. Ginger 4. Citrus Fruits 5. Almonds 6. Yoghurt 7. Kiwi 8. Papaya 9. Green Tea 10. Sunflower Seeds
Last Month’s Crossword Answers
2. A balloon
4. A gymnast
5. A bell pepper
,4,3 ,2, 1,
1. Spinach
1. Cannibals
3. A heart
Tens
The Top Ten Foods to Boost Your Immune System...
10. Purdue Pharma $270 million - 2019 Riddle Answers:
Quiz Answers 1. 1912 2. Carry on Sergeant 3. Samsung 4. Dave Bartram 5. Aluminium 6. Lisbon 7. 20,000 daily 8. Robert Peel 9. Ag 10. Percy Shaw. 11. Bee Hummingbird.
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Find The Wolf Answer
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Please mention The Sentinella when responding to adverts : 091 2 6 Police Local y : 952 540 6662 it 0 4 ic 5 r t Elec ater : 952 W
...In our own random order!
Bus Stations Torre del Mar Call: 952 559 100 Malaga Call: 952 350 061 Tourist Information Nerja: 952 521 531 Torre del Mar: 952 541 104 Hospitals Nerja Ambulatorio: 952 523 131 Velez Malaga: 951 067 000
Weekly Market days (mornings only) Mondays: Torrox Costa Tuesdays: Nerja & Country Farmers Market, at Jardines del Trapiche Wednesdays; Rincon de la Victoria, Algarrobo Costa Thursdays: Velez Malaga, Torre del Mar & Frigilana Fridays: Cala de Moral Saturdays: Caleta de Velez, Competa & Benajarafe, Algarrobo Costa, Opp Lidl (1st & 3rd Saturday each month) Sundays: Nerja Car Boot ITV Call: 951 707 108 www.itvcita.com
Shops 10am - 2pm - 5pm - 8:30pm (generally)
Town Halls Torre and Velez: 952 500 100 Torrox: 952 538 200 Nerja: 952 548 400 Competa: 952 516 006 Rincon: 952 402 300 Malaga: 952 135 000 Airports Malaga 24-hour information 952 048 484 or 952 048 804 Granada 958 245 200 Railway Stations Malaga: 952 360 202 Granada: 958 271 272
Water Supplies Velez Malaga: 952 506 450 Nerja: 952 520 154 Malaga: 952 135 013 Consulates UK 902 109 256 or 913 342 194 Ireland 952 475 108 Germany 952 363 591 Sweden 952 604 383 France 952 226 590 / 952 214 888 Belgium 952 559 159 Denmark 952 211 797 Luxembourg 952 857 197 Chemists www.bit.ly/dutychemists
2 ia : 06 Guardlance : 061 Ambu : 080 Fire
Moviestar Dial 1002 to report a fault on the line. For general enquiries dial 1004
Church services in English The Anglican Parish of Nerja Services at Iglesia San Miguel (St Michael's Church), every Sunday at 12 noon. There is an on-line "zoom" service on Wednesdays 9.30am. Please contact Fr Nigel with an e-mail address if you would like to join us. Priest in Charge: Father Nigel Thomas. Tel: Church House 951 815736, Mobile: 608 695 756, email: cofenerja@gmail.com, website: www:nerjaalmunecaranglicanchurch.co.uk. Competa - Holy Communion every Sunday at 5.30pm in the Parish Church, Plaza Almijara, Cómpeta Tel: 952 219 396 Malaga - St. George´s Church in the Engish Cemetery. 11.00am Sun Tel: 952 110 416 website: stgeorgemalaga.org Velez-Malaga - Capilla De San Jose, Calle Linares 7, Velez-Malaga. Sun 10.30. Tel 608 063 873 Anglican communion. Torre del Mar - St Barnabas Church (IERE) Spanish episcopal services in English at 11am, Morning Prayer 1st and 3rd Sundays. Holy Communion 2nd and 4th Sundays. Tel. 952 030 461 (Priest). Lux Mundi Ecumenical Centre, Avda Moscatel 1 "I", (Gardens of Viña Malaga/ Antigua Casa Del Viña). Sunday Anglican Church of St. Barnabas (IERE) 11am. Morning prayer 1st & 3rd Sundays, Holy Communion 2nd & 4th Sundays. Torre del Mar Evangelical Church Torre del Mar Presbyterian Church (Evangelical) meets for worship each Sunday at 11.00am in Legends Bar, C/ Don Cipriano Maldonado Jiménez, Torre del Mar. Email info@torredelmarchurch.es Torre del Mar: International Church Málaga/ Cornerstone International Church. Meets Sun @ 11:30am & Wed @ 6:30 pm for Bible Study. Calle Solera 2, Bajos,Torre del Mar Evangelical Church - El Puente Christian Fellowship Sunday Worship 11am - Bible Study Wed 2-4pm. AA - Wed 7pm. Charity shop/books open Wed, Thurs, Fri & Sat 10-1.30pm. We meet at El Puente Christian Fellowship premises situated underneath Maroma Inmobilaria, Cruce de Periana Puente don Manuel. 952 117 145 or 952 518 185 Bank Hours Usually 8:30am-2pm except Sundays, Bank holidays and Fiestas. Please note, the majority of banks will not accept bills to be paid (ie: electric, phone, rates) after 11am. Taxis Torre: 653 917 004, Nerja: 952 520 537 Velez Malaga: 653 917 004, Puente Don Manuel: 952 510 992 Mob: 616 034 636.
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What’s O n
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PLEASE CHECK TO SEE IF EVENTS ARE TAKINg PLACE
‘The 'Big Cats' We are a group of Jaguar enthusiasts living in Andalucia. We have a meeting each month for a meal and a good old chat about our cars. Contact Philip Wray on 669 434 457 JEC.CostaDelSol@gmail.com
Join El Valle! El Valle is one of Axarquia’s most successful and longest running social clubs based in Lake Vinuela area. We meet on the first Mon of each month (not Aug) at Punto de Encuentro Asador, Puente don Manuel) At our monthly meetings you can find out about our wide range of activities that range from the cultural and gastronomic to quizzes, games and films. We also organise days out and short trips away. www.el-valleasociacion.com LADIES WOT LUNCH. 2nd Mon of each month except July & August.Restaurante el Trapiche, Velez Malaga on the road to Benamargosa. 1pm for 1:30 start. Enjoy a 4 course meal with wine for just 11€ with a raffle included. Everyone welcome and no need to book, just come along and make new friends. Further info please contact patriciagabbitas@gmail.com
Lux Mundi Ecumenical Centre, Torre del Mar, Avda. Moscatel 1”I”, (Jardines Viña Malága/Antigua Casa de la Viña), Torre del Mar. Open mornings only Mon to Thurs 10.00 till 13.00 and Fri as usual 11.00 - 13.00. We would like to assure you that we are complying with all the Covid regulations. For further information please contact the Centre, Torre del Mar Tel. 952 543 334 E-mail: luxmundi@luxmundi.org www.lux-mundi.org We would also like to invite you to become a Friend of Lux Mundi, please call in the Centre for more information, If you are already a Friend please call in to renew your card. The Nerja Philosophical Group For info please call Tom Bryson on 699 170 931
Trumps Bridge We are a very friendly international Bridge Club playing Duplicate twice weekly on Monday and Thursday afternoons at 2.45pm. We now play in our new premises at El Zoco, Calle Neptuno, Nerja. We will be starting a beginners' course in the near future and run a Mentor scheme for those wishing to improve their game. Should you require a partner, or wish further information on our Club, visit www.bridgewebs.com/trumpsnerja The Nerja History Group for anyone interested in Spanish History. We have Lectures and trips each month. Meetings are held at the Nerja Museum, above the underground car park, starting at
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11.00am and finish approx. 12.30pm. Please email: nerjahistorygroup@yahoo.com
Phoenix Club We now meet every Tues between 12 and 2pm at Bar La Vega, Avenida Andalucia and is sandwiched between the small Mercadona Supermarket and the Repsol Garage on the way out of Torre towards Malaga. Call Gail 951 067 723 www.phoenixsocialclub.co.uk Short Mat Bowls is now operating in the hotel Jimesol, C/ Chaparil, Nerja on Mon and Thurs afternoons from 1.45pm to 4.15pm. New members welcome. Contact Marian on 952 523 754 or Malcolm on 952 520 579 for more details. www.shortmatbowlsnerja.com Golf: TOGS (Torrox Golf Society) If you would like a friendly but competitive game of golf each Sunday morning at Anoreta, then why not join TOGS, possibly the friendliest Society on the Costa. Email: torroxgolfsociety@gmail.com or call Captain: Bob Bennett on 691 571 570
International Choir recruiting singers. Would you like to join a choir? We are inviting new singers to become members of the local, long-established choir, Coral Coraxalia under the leadership of Eusebio Pita. Rehearsals Thurs 17.30–8pm in the room under Inmobiliaria Maroma Estate Agents (on the left at the crossroads in Puente Don Manuel A402) For more info call 689 111 352 email eucorax@hotmail.es
RBL Benajarafe Branch meet every Fri from 12.00 at the Restaurante Mediterraneo situated on the coast road in Benajarafe. We enjoy bingo, quizzes, various entertainment & monthly outings. We have an excellent weekly lunch & welcome new/existing RBL members. Tel: 653108415 benajaraferblspainsouth@gmail.com
Colmenar Social Club is a group whose aim is to promote friendship and assistance to all our members. We meet every Wed from 12.00pm at Arco Del Sol Hotel, Colmenar on A356 KM9. A great venue to enjoy a variety of activities such as wine tasting, talks, cooking demonstrations, monthly lunches, car sharing days out, theatre visits and a monthly bowling group. Tel: Carol on 623 125 656
RBL - Nerja meets twice a month for lunch - on the 3rd Thur at the Al Andalus Hotel, Maro. Everyone is welcome to join us. Booking is essential. Please contact Kim on tel: +44 7988029001 or email: kim_bowe1@hotmail.com.
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Essex Girl enters a sex shop and asks for a vibrator. The man says “Choose from our range on the wall.” She says “I'll take the red one.” The man replies “That's a fire extinguisher.” ------------------------------------------------------------One day his dad gets a new job so his family has to move to a new city. Johnny's daddy thinks, “I'll get a head start on Johnny's gambling.” So he calls the teacher and says, “My son Johnny will be starting your class tomorrow but he likes to gamble so you'll have to keep an eye on him.” The teacher says OK, she can handle it. The next day Johnny walks into class and hands the teacher an apple and says, “Hi, my name is Johnny.” She says, “Yes I know who you are.” Johnny smiles and says, “I bet you 10€ you've got a mole on your bottom.” The teacher thinks that she will break his little gambling problem so she takes him up on the bet. She pulls her pants down and shows him her bottom and there was no mole. That afternoon, Johnny goes home and tells his dad that he lost 10€ to the teacher and why. So his dad calls the teacher and says, "”ohnny said that he bet you that you had a mole on your bottom and he lost.” The teacher says, “Yeah, and I think I broke his gambling problem.” Johnny's dad laughs and says, “No you didn't, he bet me a 100€ this morning that he'd see your arse before the day was over.” ------------------------------------------------------------The children had all been photographed, and the teacher was trying to persuade them each to buy a copy of the group picture.
“Just think how nice it will be to look at it when you are all grown up and say, “There's Jennifer, she's a lawyer,” or “That's Michael, He's a doctor.” A small voice at the back of the room rang out, “And there’s the teacher, she's dead.” ------------------------------------------------------------The children were lined up in the cafeteria of a Catholic elementary school for lunch. At the head of the table was a large pile of apples. The nun made a note, and posted on the apple tray: “Take only ONE. God is watching.” Moving further along the lunch line, at the other end of the table was a large pile of chocolate chip cookies. A child had written a note, “Take all you want, God is watching the apples.” ------------------------------------------------------------A blonde calls her boyfriend and says, “Please come over here and help me. I have a killer jigsaw puzzle, and I can't figure out how to get started.” Her boyfriend asks, “What is it supposed to be when it's finished?” The blonde says, “According to the picture on the box, it's a rooster.” Her boyfriend decides to go over and help with the puzzle. She lets him in and shows him where she has the puzzle spread all over the table. He studies the pieces for a moment, then looks at the box, then turns to her and says, “First of all, no matter what we do, we're not going to be able to assemble these pieces into anything resembling a rooster.” He takes her hand and says, “Second, I want you to relax. Let's have a nice cup of tea, and then...” He said with a deep sigh,..... “Let's put all the Corn Flakes back in the box.”
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Jokes h a ha
To advertise call 664 210 468 or email sales@thesentinella.com
An armed hooded robber bursts into the Bank of Ireland and forces the tellers to load a sack full of cash. As he is on his way out the door with the loot, one brave Irish customer grabs the hood and pulls it off revealing the robber's face. The robber shoots the guy in the head without hesitation! He then looks around the bank to see if anyone else has seen him. One of the tellers is looking straight at him and the robber walks over and calmly shoots him in the head also. Everyone by now is very scared and looking down at the floor. “Did anyone else see my face?” calls the robber. There is a few moments silence then one elderly Irish gent, looking down, tentatively raises his hand and says, “I think me wife may have caught a glimpse” ------------------------------------------------------------Prince Charles decided to take up jogging. Every day, he'd jog past a hooker standing on the same street corner. He learned to brace himself as he approached her for what was almost certain to follow. “One hundred and fifty pounds!” she'd shout from the curb. “No! Five pounds!” He would fire back, just to shut her up. This ritual between him and the hooker became a daily occurrence. He'd run by and she'd yell, “One hundred and Fifty pounds!” He'd yell back, “Five pounds!” One day, Camilla decided that she wanted to accompany her 'husband' on his jog. As the jogging couple neared the working woman's street corner, Prince Charles realised she'd bark her £150 offer and Camilla would wonder what he'd really been doing on all his past outings. He figured he'd better have a good explanation for his wife. As they jogged into the turn that would take them past the corner, he became even more apprehensive than usual. Sure enough, there
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was the hooker. He tried to avoid the prostitute's eyes as she watched the pair jogged past. Then, from her corner, the hooker yelled: “See what you get for five pounds, you tight bastard?!” ------------------------------------------------------------Fresh from her shower, she stood in front of the mirror complaining to her husband that her breasts were too small. Instead of characteristically telling her, it's not so, he came up with a suggestion. “If you want your breasts to grow, then every day take a piece of toilet paper and rub it between them for a few seconds.” Willing to try anything, she fetched a piece of toilet paper and stood in front of the mirror, rubbing it between her breasts. “How long will this take?” she asked. “They will grow larger over a period of years,” her husband replies. She stopped. “Do you really think rubbing a piece of toilet paper between my breasts every day will make my breasts larger over the years?” Without missing a beat he says, “Worked for your backside, didn't it?” ------------------------------------------------------------Q. Why did the tomato blush? A. Because he saw the salad, dressing. ------------------------------------------------------------Q. What did the lettuce say to the celery? A. Are you stalking me? ------------------------------------------------------------Q. Why do people kill animals? A. Fur convenience steak. ------------------------------------------------------------Did you hear about the crook who stole a calendar? He got twelve months. ------------------------------------------------------------Q. What's the difference between ignorance and apathy? A. I don’t know and I don’t care.
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s e g a P e l Puzz
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Get Quizical
1. In which year did the Titanic sink on 15 April?
2. What is the title of the first ever Carry On film made in 1958?
3. What is the name of the biggest technology company in South Korea? 4. Which singer fronted the 1970s’ pop group Showaddywaddy? 5. Which metal was discovered by Hans Christian Oersted in 1825? 6. What is the capital of Portugal?
7. How many breaths does the human body take daily? 8. Who was Prime Minister of Great Britain from 1841 to 1846? 9. What is the chemical symbol for silver? 10. Who invented Cat’s Eyes in 1934 to improve road safety? 11. What is the world’s smallest bird?
Easy
Hey Diddle Riddle
1. Our dinner guests cry that we are evil, when they notice their place in the meal. But its no big deal why; we are just one big happy tribe! And we get really fed up with people! Who, What or Are we? 2. I can be any shape, I can a be surprise to your loved one, just fill me up and make sure to hold me real tight so I won’t fly away. What am I? 3. I can be broken or attacked, I can be clogged or crushed, I can be given and I can be kept, sometimes I am warm and other times I am cold. What am I?
4. I flop around on sticks and sometimes you cheer me as I do, I desperately need a white powder to do what needs to be done, and looking at me you might wonder why I look like I am about to go swimming. What am I?
5. I can be sweet or not so much, I have nice curves and from my name you might think I make a ringing sound. What am I?
Answers on page 99
Sudokus
Tough
Puzzle P ages
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Across
Crossword
1 Time after sunset when it’s neither light nor dark (4) 3 Stocky; compact (8) 9 Grapple: engage in deep thought (7) 10 Thin diaphanous fabric of wool, cotton or silk (5) 11 No longer one’s responsibility (3,4,5) 14 Goal: finality (3) 16 Small unit of imperial weight (5) 17 Historical period; chapter in history (3) 18 Any of 32 directional marks seen on a traditional mariner’s dial (7,5) 21 Kindly endorsement and guidance (5) 22 Fresh soft cheese of France (7) 23 Fashionable; modern (2-2-4) 24 River of northern England (4)
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Down
1 Index, an indicator of stock market prices (3,5)
2 Bundle; truss (5)
4 Colouring; tone (3)
5 Buyer’s responsibility (6,6)
6 Stick or pin used to twist the yarn in spinning(7)
7 Sentimentally sweet (4)
8 Confront; pit against (5,7)
12 Cranial cavity linked to the nose (5) 13 Stronghold; citadel (8) 15 Hurt dog (anag) (7)
19 Effigy; simulacrum (5)
20 Capital of Azerbaijan (4) 22 Hale; in rude health (3)
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s e p o c s o Hor
To advertise call 664 210 468 or email sales@thesentinella.com
by Juanita Banana of Banana Moon Yoga Therapy, Studio, Travel & Retreats
ARIES: March 21-April 20 If you’re feeling fidgety and restless, even slightly rebellious, you’ll be ready to take advantage of February’s energy and excitement. The 6th, 7th and 8th are days when you can take decisions that will make everything work out spectacularly well!
TAURUS: April 21-May 21 These first few days of February will be challenging for Taureans, creating opportunity to practice not taking things personally. Take time out and do a daily something nice for yourself. Things will improve by the 9th or 10th
GEMINI: May 22-June 21 The changes you’ve been through are important to your spiritual growth. Use them so this month you can move quickly forward, feeling good each step of the way, with new opportunities awaiting CANCER: June 22-July 22 An incurable romantic, you will never-the less need to choose intellect before emotion to successfully navigating the smaller stuff this month. On the 8th say ‘no’ to someone who demands too much LEO: July 23-August 23 Do you feel you are on your true path for this lifetime or are you feeling slightly off-centre and disoriented? If your ego is getting out of hand, take time to consider if you and it have the same goals. If not, let ego take a back seat for a while
VIRGO: August 24-September 22 Following an eventful January, Virgo needs to come back to earth and be grounded. You’ll find a very creative space and, as the month gets going, and there’s no telling what kinds of new and unusual approaches you’re going to take.
LIBRA: September 23 - October 22 Are you committed? Whether it’s romance, work or a friendship, you need to decide and back out if you aren’t. The more respect and compassion you have for yourself, the more you will enjoy your relationships. Do your best to create quality time for yourself SCORPIO: October 23 - November 21 Is your life too tame and too quiet? Things are about to change, so you need to create more energy, more initiative and generally more physical stamina. Good time to meditate and exercise…walk, swim, play golf…whatever you enjoy, you’ll feel better
SAGITTARIUS: November 22 - December 21 Your ideas are good, sharp and penetrating, so stand by them! This month you have time and clarity to think about your intentions and goals for the next year, and can make plans. Get out into the fresh air too!
CAPRICORN: December 22 - January 20 You`re in a good place to investigate major issues including life, birth, death and emotional maturity. This is a great time to develop your ability to forgive and to practice compassion and patience
AQUARIUS: January 21 - February 19 This is a good month to catch up with old friends, family members and that special someone. An affair of the head or of the heart could really rock your world mid-month - plunge in if you’re free to do so
PISCES: February 20 - March 20 Good news follows good news for Pisces during February leaving you wanting to give back. Whether it’s the people around you, or folks half a world away, you can use your considerable intellect to figure out workable solutions. Then pat yourself on the back.
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We can Call toda list your Busines s y on 664 210 468 here from just 5 e or Email : sales@th uros a month!! esentine lla.com
ADVERTISING AGENCY
lDigitalleria Website Design and more offers best international service. Faster premium hosting, better and safer Software than open-source CMS. Call 00491788082716 on Whatsapp or 951230255 or Email info@digitalleria.com www.digitalleria.com
AIR CONDITIONING
lFor Air Conditioning call Mark at Esola, 616 119 007, Torre del Mar lPolar Air For Professional and reliable servicing, repairs and installation of A/C at competitive rates by a qualified technician. Call Jordan 655 211 192 or visit www.polarair.eu lCHS Cooling and Heating Solutions. All makes of air conditioning, serviced and installed. Also Solar, Heating and swimming pool heat pumps. Call: 655 791 167 Email: chsspain@gmail.com
lConnect Air Conditioning. Supplying the latest in heat pump technology at the best prices. Contact Sean: 639 738 624 www.connectairconditioning.com Email: connect.aircon@hotmail.com lCool Solutions all leading brands of air conditioning supplied and fitted, servicing only â‚Ź30 per unit. Heat pumps for pools and heating. Occupancy sensors supplied and fitted. Tel: 693 047 935 or 625 822 410. Email: coolsolutions.es@gmail.com.
AWNINGS
lAwnings - Blinds - Mosquito Screens, Glass Curtain Repairs, Replacement of plastic jointing strips, New Installations, Roller Shutters / Repairs. New installations, Conversion from manual to motorised. Call Julian: 655 825 931
BEAUTY & BOUTIQUE
lThe Hair & Beauty Studio Cruce de Periana, Puente don Manuel, (along from Morenos) Call: 951 204 158 or 654 897 410
BLINDS
lSolar blinds, ideal for large glazed areas to keep the view but also giving privacy and stopping maximum amounts of heat/glare and fading of furnishings. ian@solarshadetinting.com Speak to Ian 644 54 61 76
BUILDERS
lLT Construction - is a building company based in the Velez Malaga area. We specialise in all aspects of design, building license application & construction, we have over 14 years of expertise in creating individual building solutions for our clients. Our local knowledge of the land and its soil types - and how best to deal with the challenges posed by them means that we are the best-suited company to advise you on your building requirements. Call Lee Talbot on 659324586 info@ltconstruction.es www.ltconstruction.es
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BUILDERS (Continued)
lJohn Housby, Building, Plastering, Tiling & Painting. For a quotation ring John: 699 261 414. Email: housbyjohn@gmail.com lgeneral building maintenance, for all those little jobs you need to do! Replacing broken tiles, grouting, rendering repairs, silicone around baths, sinks, windows, painting, persiana repairs, roof leaks, awning re-covers, pool maintenance etc.. Phone/Whatsapp Ian on 644 546 176
CARPENTERS
lQuality Bespoke Wooden Furniture. Your design brought to life. Any size, colour or design for homes, gardens and businesses. www.weswoodwork.com / Telephone: 679 171 008
CAR ACCESSORIES
lWindow Tinting, A mobile service for your convenience, ITV legal and certified. Cut out annoying glare. Stop U/V. Protect children and pets. Be cool. Enjoy the sun, don’t suffer it! Call Ian 902 888 176 / 644 546 176
CAR RENTAL
lNo hidden cost, delivery along the coast, personal meet & greet service at the airport with no queues or bus journeys. www.quickcarhiremalaga.com quickcarhiremalaga@gmail.com 669 899 065 / Whatsapp available
CARERS
Professional live in and day time carers for long and short term. Specialising in mobility and dementia care. For more details call or WhatsApp Sheila Taylor on 0034 610 613 149 sheilat5@hotmail.co.uk
CARE HOMES
lCasa Klein. A better place to live. Scandinavian convelescent and retirement home. Situated on a hilltop overlooking mountains and the sea in Velez Malaga. Tel: 952 50 21 30 Mob: 679 167 168 www.casaklein.com
CHIROPODISTS
lRegisitered Chiropodist/Podiatrist offering a complete footcare service in the comfort of your own home. Over 25yrs exp NHS & private. Call: 636 866 715
Foot care in the comfort of your home. Services including nail cutting, corn, callus and ingrowing toe nail removal. Specialising in diabetic foot care. Full PPE worn. Clare Sasada 659825512.
CLEANING
lUltra Clean, Clean & Changeovers, key holding, house-keeping, laundry, window cleaning, gardening etc.. Call Pammy: 674 597 984 Torre del Mar area
COMPUTER SERVICES
lSteve’s Computer and Laptop Service. Providing a thorough health check/repair for corrupted software and removal of virus/malware infections. Sales of used/refurbished laptops at competitive prices. Call Steve in Torrox: 634347055 Email: sfmay@hotmail.com
COMPUTERS
lDavid Fenton: Computer Help Specialist. Microsoft Certified Systems Engineer since 2000. House calls, remote assistance or bring it to me. Help and impartial advice with all types of technology. Tel 952 549 607, Mob 654 899 976
COUNSELLING
lKestrel Counselling. Professional, confidential, qualified counselling service. Face to Face, skype or online. Experienced with all age groups including children. Calle Tejada 25, Velez Malaga. Tel: 636 588 697 www.kestrelcounselling.com Email: kestrelcounselling@gmail.com
CURRENCY TRANSFERS
lCurrencies Direct. For all your currency transfer requirements; excellent exchange rates, 100% no transfer fees or hidden charges – Contact the Nerja office on 952 906 581 or email nerja@currenciesdirect.com
DAMP PROOFING
lElectro-OS S.L. Immediately effective. 20 Year guarantee. Tel: 958 656 560 / 619 666 363 www.electro-os.com info@Electro-os.com
DECORATION INTERIOR/EXTERIOR
lTejidos Belen For all your soft furnishings. Specialists in cushions, pillows, accessories, interior & exterior decoration. We repair your sofas & terrace furniture. Tel: 952531732 / 650964624 Avd. Andalucia No.34 (next to Supermarket La Plaza)Torrox Costa
To advertise call 664 210 468 or email sales@thesentinella.com DENTISTRY
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lClinica Europa Centro internacional, Blq. 86, Torrox Costa. Call: 952 53 09 08 Email: info@clinicaeuropa.eu British dentist, 24hrs response Call: 648 203 157 lDentadanes s.c Dental Clinic Offering Danish, top quality dental care at competitive prices. Est. since 1991. We speak English, Danish, German and Spanish Tel: 952 529 666 Mon-Fri 10-5pm www.dentadanes.com
DRAIN CLEARANCE
lDrains & Plumbing Est.1999. 24 Hour call out. Tel/Fax: 952 539 425. 24 Hour Service: 634 275 030 / 657 862 628 lDrain & Leak Solutions Your underground plumbers! High pressure water jetting, Drain tracing CCTV, Septic tank problems & installations, baths, sinks & toilets unblocked, leak detection & repairs. Fully qualified and fully legal. No call out fee!! Tel: 951 310 111 / 651 111 005 www.drain&leak.com
ELECTRICIANS
lSparkinspain - Electrical installations & maintenance. Local from Nerja to Velez-Malaga & inland to Competa and Frigiliana.Tel Colin 951 242 449/Mob 666707297 sparkinspain@rocketmail.com Web: www.english-electrician-nerja.com
ELECTRIC SUPPLIERS
lDo you pay too much for your electric? Contact Daniel from AxarEnergy today on: 662 114 241. More than 1000 clients have already changed over and there is no cost to you for switching! Email: daniel@axarenergy@gmail.com
ESTATE AGENTS
lBuy A Home Spain Calle Pintor Cipriano Maldonado 7A, Edificio Salares, 29740, Torre del Mar. (Opposite the bus station) Call: 952 547 554 or 680 210 414. Email: info@buyahomespain.com Website: www.buyahomespain.com lAxarquia Properties S.L Est. 2001. Office: 952 436 781 Cta. Almeria 194, Benajarafe Email: info@axarquiaproperties.com www.axarquiaproperties.com lFleming Properties, Calle Dr. Fleming, 1, Nerja. 952 524 140 or 637 278 306/606 087 362, www.fleming-properties.com lAndalucia Real Estate (Belgian management)- sales and renovations since 2005 – Axarquia area – Dutch/Belgian/English market. Av. De Los Cipreses 16, Frigiliana. 0034-952 53 44 81 or 0034-666 82 17 96 info@andaluciarealestate.eu www.andaluciarealestate.eu
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lCountry Properties 29754 Competa - Málaga Plaza Almijara, 21 & Avd. Constitución, 33 Tel.: +34 952 51 61 78 29770 Torrox - Málaga Calle Elisa Ortigosa, 7 Tel.: +34 952 53 91 25 29740 Torre del Mar Málaga Avda. Andalucia, 32B Tel.: +34 952 54 18 86 / 654 693 680 www.countryproperties.net sales@countryproperties.net
lAndalucia4you.net Advice on the entire buying-selling process including property management and reforms. Avda. Andalucia 125, Caleta de Velez. Call: 952 72 08 32 or whatsapp 634 35 70 26 Email: contact@andalucia4you.net www.andalucia4you.net lImmotions Real Estate, selling to Belgian, Dutch, English & Scandinavian clients. We offer; one go-to person, renovation guidance, after-sales service and much more! Call +34/654 899 531 or +34/656 823 048 Website: immotionsrealestate.com E-mail: info@immotionsrealestate.com lAxarquia Real Estate.com A better place to live. Professional services for buying and selling property. Cruce Puente Don Manuel 4, next to the pool shop. Tel: 663 093 782 Email: info@axarquiarealestate.com lExpat Real Estate - More Than A Real Estate Agency, we offer numerous tailor-made services, especially if you need advice in your own language. Call 0034 671 410 153 or 0034 952 117 406 Email: info@expatrealestatemalaga.com Web: www.expatrealestatemalaga.com
lBluCee Inmobiliaria / Real Estate Bespoke service by dedicated team covering Málaga, Axarquia and Costa Tropical. Sales, property management, holiday rentals. www.blucee.com info@blucee.com Tel: 0034 711 042 727
EST AGENTS/PROPERTY RENTALS
lSpanish Management Vinuela (next to the Farmacia) Sales, Rentals, Management, Holidays. Professional advice with 14 years experience in Spain. Tel 666 135 516 / 618 940 829 Email: spanishmanagement1@gmail.com Web: www.spanishmanagement.com lZalia properties, long established rental agents, Lake Viñuela area. Car hire, Pool, Villa cleans etc. El Cruce de Periana 4, Edf. Alzabel, Semisotano 2, Alcaucin www.zaliaproperties.net 952 519 718 / 663 093 782, 696 206 158
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lThe Town Frier All Your Chippy Favourites. Fish & Chips, Kebabs, Pies... All freshly cooked. We now serve rotisserie chickens every Saturday & Sunday,eat-in or takeaway. Calle Venta Baja 10, Puente don Manuel. Call: 696 33 93 36
FINANCIAL SERVICES
lSpectrum IFA Group, Specialist Financial Advice to Expatriates across Europe. Our expertise covers Retirement & Pension Planning including QROPS, Life Assurance, Efficient Investing (using Insurance wrappers), Succession & Inheritance Tax Planning, Currency Exchange & much more. Contact Antony on 0034 639 418 017
FUNERAL DIRECTORS
lLa Esperanza Funeral Parlour. Funeral Directors with their own funeral parlours and crematorium with more than 50 years experience in the Malaga province. Telephone 952 50 15 81, 24 hours a day 365 days a year (in case of death/emergencies)
FURNITURE
lCudeca Hospice Charity Shop – Torre del Mar C/ Infante 21 – Edf. Jamaica Bajo Tel: 663 083 273 Mon-Sat 10.00 – 13.30 / Mon- Fri 17:00 – 20.00. Nerja C/ Almirante Carranza 15 Tel: 663 083 503 Mon-Sat 10.00 – 13.30 www.cudeca.org
GARDENING
lRed Palm Beetles, Wasps, Ants, Woodlice, Mice, Rats and all pests. Processionary Moths. Call us for treatment and disposal of these garden problems. Tel: 634 431 099
GARDEN FURNITURE
lDe Tropen - Specialist in garden furniture, 13.000m2, all models in stock. www.detropen.es Location: Autovía del Mediterraneo A-7 (Exit 272), 29700 Velez Malaga, Entrance behind Repsol gasoline station. Tel. 642 651 074
GARDENING & POOLS
lGarden & Pool Service, German gardener, landscaping, property maintenance, pool maintenance, boat servicing. Speaks German, English & Spanish. Good rates. All areas. Tel: 691 526 394
HANDYMAN SERVICES
lAxarquia Handyman Services, Flat-pack assembly & installation specialist, shelving, blinds, painting and decorating, general DIY. Or just an extra pair of hands. Phone or Whatsapp Bill: 617 61 29 16 or Email: bsacbill@gmail.com (Based near Lake Vinuela)
HEALTH & BEAUTY
lWeight Control - Herbalife Independent Distributor, Bea Savory, 665 118 607 beasav24@gmail.com (business opportunity also available)
HEALTH & WELLBEING
lKate Blatherwick Therapy, Professional Psychotherapist, Clinical Hypnotherapist, Counselling and Life Coach. Call Kate for a free, no obligation, confidential consultation 711 00 31 71 www.kateblatherwick.com email: katejblatherwick@gmail.com
HEALTH SHOPS
lRincón Natural Nerja: natural remedies, organic food, superfoods, natural skincare products, spelt husk pillows, essential oils, incense & feng shui crystals. Alternative therapies: personalised weight control coaching, naturopath consultance etc. C/ Carretera 1, in front of Supersol, Nerja. Tel. 952 523 503 ONLINE-SHOP for Europe www.rinconnatural.com lHigh Grade Medical Cannabis Oils for sale - helps people with Cancer, Anxiety, Depression, Pain, Diabetes, Epilepsy, Fibromyalgia, Glaucoma. Prices from €30/60ml 6%CBD. Magy's Garden Grow Av.Andalucia 106, Caleta de Velez Tel: 952 511 857 magysgardengrow@hotmail.com
HEATING
lRedwell® – the leading brand in Infrared Heating Systems. White panels and designs like mirrors, pictures, glass etc. Low consumption, low running time due to partial storage material inside. Prevents damp. Contact/showroom: Avda. El Faro, Bl. 75, bajo 9, Torrox Costa, call 952 539 742, sscharler@gmx.de, www.redwell.com
INSURANCE
lGPS Insurance Services - For all your Insurance needs (Personal & Business) Check out our easy to navigate website to request quotes www.gpsinsuranceservices.com email: admin@gpsinsuranceservices.com Tel/Whatsapp: 711 021 479
To advertise call 664 210 468 or email sales@thesentinella.com
The Sentinella Paginas
lLinea Directa, Car insurance starts from 194€. Best prices and best cover. Car, motorcycle, home and vehicle fleet insurance. Call: 952 147 834 www.lineadirecta.com lLiberty Seguros The Expats No. 1 choice for insurances. Avda. Andalucia, 61 Blq 1, Local E, Torre del Mar. Call: 913 017 883 / 617 967 668 Email: patricia.camps@exclusivos.libertyseguros.es FB: liberty.seguros.expats
KENNELS AND CATTERIES
lHome From Home Dog Boarding at my 10,000m2 finca in Riogordo. No kennels, just lots of exercise, fun & cuddles. Also pet paw casting & bespoke animal sculptures in cement & needle felting. Call: 678 189 019 or e-mail: riogordo@mail.com www.homefromhome.weebly.com lSheila’s Cattery - Small cattery ‘just for cats’ in the Riogordo/Benamagosa countryside. We treat and care for your cats as our own. Tel: +34 643 635 617 www.sheilascattery.com Facebook: sheilascattery
LANGUAGES
lTrilingo Idiomas is a British run language academy based in Velez-Malaga offering English and Spanish to Expats, from beginners to advanced – call Mark or Donna on: 951 768 175 / 679 792 329
LAWYERS
lCS Abogados, Spanish solicitors, English Spoken, Torrox Costa, 952 697 004 Urb. Costa del Oro local 8, (in front of Mercadona). Torre del Mar, 951 832 130 Calle Rioja, 69, Edificio Salares, local A. (Near the Bus Station). Free initial consultation, Email: info@cslawyers.es / www.cslawyers.es lAxarquia Solicitors 15 years helping expats and non-residents –Offices in Nerja & Velez-Málaga. Call: 952 901 225 for a free no obligation appointment. mail@axarquiasolicitors.com l De Cotta Law Spanish Abogados & English Lawyers. Consultations and advice on all legal matters. Conveyancing specialists. www.decottalaw.com. Call us on 952 527 014 or email info@decottalaw.net
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MOTORBIKE RENTALS
lRoyal Motorbike Tours Fun and adventure on a Royal Enfield 500 Classic motorcycle. Half and full day tours along the gorgeous back roads of Andalucia. Book now WhatsApp (+34) 652 200 702 *Motorcycle licence is mandatory. www.royalmotorbiketours.com
METALWORK
lMetalwork made to measure - Gates, Doors, Rejas. M.O.T. welding and on-site repairs. All areas. Also building work. All work guaranteed. We support the Axarquia Animal Rescue Charity. Andy: 676 719 066 Email: sainbena@hotmail.com
MOBILITY PRODUCTS
lBlue Badge Mobility.S.L Hire & Sales of Mobility Scooters, Wheelchairs, Bathroom aids, Toilet Aids, Stair Lifts, Long term rentals, Best prices on the Costa. Quality Service. Contact Gary Or Sara 952967015/635445279 www.bluebadgemobility.com
MOSQUITO/FLY SCREENS
lMosquito Screens made to measure & repairs. Plus nets for your pets too with reinforced dog flap. Call: 674 617 379. No call out fee!
MOTORCYCLE REPAIRS
lRods motorcycles. Mobile motorcycle service and repairs. From scooters to superbikes. All makes and models. Factory trained technician. Contact 633 287 190.
OPTICIANS
lHeiko by Heiko, Avda Andalucia 119, Torre del Mar 952 967 923
ONE YEAR ADVERTISING!!! ONE PAYMENT 60 € + IVA Call: 664 210 468
112
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lParagliding gift vouchers. Give a dream to your loved ones or fulfil your dream. Fly with an instructor with 30 years exp. without risk, over some incredible landscapes in the mountains and the sea, landing gently in front of a beach bar. www.parapentegranada.info
PLUMBERS
lAndy Mann UK Corgi-registered Domestic Water and Gas services. All areas covered. Combi boiler technician. Emergency Breakdowns Tel: 633 875 588 Email: andymann_genesis@yahoo.co.uk
PLUMBERS
lPlumbing by Chris, repairs, replacement and reforms. Est. since 1982. Call Chris: 674 617 379. No call out fee!
PRINTER INK CARTRIDGES
lInk Cartridges for all makes of Printers. Original or Compatible. Tuesdays: Jardines del Trapiche Market. or call for free delivery 627 242 977 email: sales@printerink.es
PROPERTY RENTALS
lBuy A Home Spain C/ Pintor Cipriano Maldonado 7A, Edificio Salares, 29740, Torre del Mar Call: 952 547 554 or 680 210 414. Email: info@buyahomespain.com Website: www.buyahomespain.com
REMOVALS
lTony Roam Removals 15 years To & Fro Spain to UK. ES: 636 393 542 / UK: 07973 362 003 Email: tonyroam@btconnect.com www.euroam.co.uk lAlcala Transport, Fully Legal, Spanish registered Transport/Removals Company. Operating locally for over 10 years. We run two vans twice per month to and from the UK/Europe. Call Colin for a no obligation quote on 0034 608 085 700 or 0044 7936886822
RESTAURANTS
lTaj Mahal (Torre del Mar) Avenida Andalucia, Bloque Jupiter, Pasaje Timon 2, Calle Timon, Torre del Mar Tel: 952 547 798 or 665 675 053 lTaj Mahal (Puente don Manuel) Next door to Chiringuito Antonios, Venta Baja Tel: 952 510 886 / 667 934 731 lIndian Palace Barriada Buena Vista, Puente don Manuel Tel: 952 510 963 Mob: 616 942 212 Email: indianpalacealcaucin@gmail.com www.indianpalacealcaucin.blogspot.com lBuon Gusto Ristorante - Pizzeria, Paseo Maritimo, Torre del Mar Tel: 951 70 28 33 Comercial Centro Rincon De La Victoria Tel: 952 97 86 04
SATELLITE T.V.
lTotal Satellite Installations Call Phil on: 629 556 266. Email:philbraid@hotmail.com
SOLICITORS
lDel Prado & Partners, specialists in many areas of Spanish Law. Call: 952 52 72 74 / 952 52 17 47 www.delpradoandpartners-es.com lBest Law Office in Law Axarquia Area. Professional legal and tax services at affordable rates. Free quotations and consultations. Offices in Nerja and Velez-Malaga. Tel: 952 901 225 Email:mail@axarquiasolicitors.com
STORAGE/PARKING
lParking El Llano Caravans/Boats storage & General storage 24hr security, from under 1€ a day. Long term discounts available. Almayate Costa N340. Tel: 680 180 468 lPersonal Storage, fully insured with CCTV security. Secure storage / easy recovery / discount for bulk quantities. Prices from 14€ per m3, 5€ per suitcase (per month). Call: 682 525 106. Poligono Castillo Alto 66, Nerja. 150 metres behind Lidl on right.
ONE YEAR ADVERTISING!!! ONE PAYMENT 60 € + IVA Call: 664 210 468
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Need Help Attracting New Business? Your advert will be seen by thousands of readers throughout the Axarquia area; Benajarafe - Torre del Mar - Caleta de Velez - Velez Malaga Algarrobo Costa - El Morche - Torrox Costa - Torrox Pueblo Torrox Park - Nerja - Burriana - Maro - Frigiliana Puente don Manuel - Vinuela - Colmenar - Competa - Maro Sayalonga - Canillas de Albaida - Sedella - Archez Canillas de Aceituno - Periana - Benamargosa - Trapiche Small price to pay for ADVERTISINg THAT WORKS!
Adverts from as little as 5 euros per month + iva Call: 664 210 468
Email: sales@thesentinella.com SWIMMING POOLS
WEBSITE DESIGN
lPool & Garden Service, German gardener, landscaping, property maintenance, pool maintenance, boat servicing. Speaks German, English & Spanish. Good rates. All areas. Tel: 691 526 394
lWebsite design, graphic design and logos. SEO, hosting, branding, & facebook marketing. For businesses and individuals on the Costa del Sol and Andalucia - Call Tom Lumsden Call: 625 842 780 Email: tom@tomlumsden.es
TAXIS
lMobile service itv legal Solar reflective tint for glass curtains, balconies, yachts, stop fading, heat, glare, save money on cooling make living in the sun comfortable. Call: 644 546 176 ian@solarshadetinting.com
lCosta Swimming Pools, Specialists in steps and ledge construction, acid cleaning and re-grouting. Compete pool reforms. All areas covered. Call: 711 022 774 for a free quote l24 Hour Taxi - English speaking. Call Javi on 653 917 004
VETS
lPet Vet Clinic La Herradura, Vaccinations, X-Ray, Dentistry, Operations, Pet Shop & More... C/Alhambra Nº3, La Herradura. Tel: 609 977 564 We speak: English, German, Swedish, Finnish & Spanish
WANTED ITEMS
Best prices paid for jewellery, watches and artwork. 30 years in the business. Call or whatsapp Martin: 603 355 959 Email: tintoamour@gmail.com
WINDOW TINTING
WILL WRITING
lwww.britishwills.com / 951 247 255 admin@britishwills.com British Wills & UK. Lasting Powers of attorney for all UK Nationals who live abroad or who own property in Spain affiliated with: ‘The Society of Will Writers’ UK.
THIS SPACE
ONE PAYMENT 60 € + IVA FOR THE WHOLE YEAR! Call: 664 210 468
COUNTRY HOME REF: A4U2104
ALCAUCÍN
259M2 BUILT
Victoria Komina Manager Andalucia4you
WITH SEPARATE GUEST ACCOMMODATION
AN ENCHANTING PLACE WHERE YOU CAN ONLY HEAR BIRDS SINGING AND EVERYTHING YOU SEE, FEEL AND TOUCH IS QUALITY! TROPICAL GARDENS ON 6,212M2 PLOT, EASY ACCESS, GARAGE
PRICE: 419,000€
Free Virtual Tour Video with Every Listing!!
Dear clients, colleagues and friends, we hope you are all well and safe.
In all the uncertainty during the COVID-19 pandemic ANADALUCIA4YOU´s doors remain OPEN for you and WE CONTINUE OFFERING YOU: professional advice, a reliable service or just a helping hand: ✔All-round service under one umbrella ✔Your door to the Dutch, Belgian and overseas market ✔Free listing and pre-valuation ✔Local experts and personal guidance ✔10 years of experience in the Real Estate ✔Centrally located Office in Caleta de Vélez, Axarquía
FP1066 CANILLAS/VIÑUELA A recently refurbished, luxury, 130m2, 3 bedroom villa with full A/C, central heating. 6,400m usable plot with large level area around villa. Easy access from asphalt. 15 minutes’ drive to the coast. 30m2 garage/storeroom and 8m x 4m pool
349,000€
WE URgENTLY REQUIRE PRPOPERTIES FOR LONg, MEDIUM AND SHORT TERM RENTAL FOR CLIENTS FROM NERJA TO MALAgA ON THE COAST AND INLAND. ALL ASPECTS OF THE RENTAL TAKEN CARE OF
LONG TERM RENTAL TORROX FPR047 A fully reformed one-bedroom residence in the centre of the town with roof terrace. Convenient to all amenities
475€ per month + utilities
REDUCED! BENAMARGOSA FP0800
A 145m2, luxury, three-bedroom villa on a 5,383m2 plot set in the hills above Benamargosa with diving pool and marvellous views
248,000€
Calle Dr Fleming, 1 Nerja. 29780 Tel: 952 52 41 40 Mob: 637 278 306 / 606 087 362