The Sentinella Axarquia February 2011

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The Axarquia Sentinella Edition No 78

All you need for ‘info on the go’

February 11

Opticians

Tel: 952 96 79 23 Torre del Mar Tel: 952 52 83 95 Nerja See page 95

arkwrights the British store & more

95 25 19 780 www.arkwrights-groceries.com

The little mag that fits in your bag for ‘info on the go’


Rent a Home Spain Buy a Home Spain Algarrobo Costa

For Rent Ref: R1 - 068 1 bed Penthouse

Torre del Mar

For Rent

overlooking beach.

120 m².

lovely kitchen,

1 closed &

communal tennis

1 open terrace,

& pool.

double glazing.

For Rent

600€ per month Torre del Mar

Ref: R3 - 152 3 bed 2 bath Apartment, 106 m², 2 terraces, A/C, fully furnished, fitted wardrobes, paddle tennis, great location.

For Sale or Rent Ref: S3 - 009 3 bed 2 bath Apartment in much sought after Viña Malaga. Fully furnished, lovely gardens & pool, south facing, views to sea.

For sale: SUPERB PRICE 169,000€ For Rent: VERY LOW 550€ per month

Nr. Puente don Manuel

For Sale

Ref: 5S - 009

450€ per month

Bars/Restaurants & Offices/Shops We have a variety of bars/restaurants & offices for rent & for sale in Torre del Mar & Torrox, all different prices, sizes & locations. From 550€ per month Sedella

For Sale Ref: S3 – 098 Delightful Village house, 5 years old, 110 m². 3 beds 2 baths, roof terrace, large garage, A/C, log burner stove, double glazing, mosquito nets. For Sale BARGAIN 149,999€ Torre del Mar Retail Business

For Sale

Ref: C - 013

A very profitable, incredibly busy going-concern on the busiest road in town. It comprises a shop with office above and the business is ready to be taken over. Reluctant Sale is for personal reasons.

Impressive Spacious Detached Villa 270 m² built, 3,000 m² plot 5 beds & 3 baths, large living room, separate dining room, wood-burner fire, large kitchen. Includes apartment with 2 bed, 1 bath, kitchen & second large living room. 10 x 5 pool, double garage, gardens, various terraces. Fabulous views.

For sale: FANTASTIC PRICE 399,000€ Do you have a quality property to sell?

2 bath Apartment

Fully furnished,

350€ per month Torre del Mar

Ref: R3 - 155 Spacious 3 bed

ENQUIRE TODAY for fur ther details

www.rentahomespain.com email: info@rentahomespain.com Avda. Andalucia, 135, Torre del Mar Tel: 952 547 554 or 680 210 414

We have serious investors with money ready to buy NOW!

(You’ll find us just round the corner from the Thursday market at the roundabout)


To advertise call 664 210 468 or email sales@thesentinella.com

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CONtaCt Us:

m Fro Ed... the

Editor: keidi - 610 976 284 Email: info@thesentinella.com

I’ve just finished reading a book which touched me to such a degree that I feel it deserves an ample mention in this month’s magazine. The book is called A Stranger In Paradise by Julie Chimes. Thirty years ago Julie was almost stabbed to death in her home by a paranoid schizophrenic, who claimed that God had instructed her to act in such a way. As the meat knife which once lived in Julie’s cutlery drawer, repeatedly plunged into her flesh, she found herself outside of her body, free from pain and watching the horror unfold as if she were a member of an audience. Luckily, a week or so before the tragedy, Julie had been informed by a psychic medium to “change the front door.” A new door, which opened outwards – rather than inwards into a pokey hall – had been sitting in the garage for months. So Julie acted on the advice and asked her boyfriend to get on with the chore. This new front door ultimately helped to save her life. Now back in her body, the knife-wielding madwoman continued to stab Julie, who by now was smothered with blood. Somehow she found the strength to shuffle to the front door. She fell into the fresh air to see shoppers carrying their M & S bags after a trip to the supermarket. But instead of the help she craved, when these people saw Julie they screamed and fled. The stabbing continued as using her elbows, she pushed her body into the road, thinking that the cars would surely stop. Alas, they simply steered around her.

sales: kami - 664 210 468 Email:sales@thesentinella.com Distribution/Collections: tony - 664 689 138 Follow us on twitter @the_sentinella or @keidi_keating Email: sales@thesentinella.com www.thesentinella.com

Deposito Legal Ma-1435-2005 No part of this publication, including pictures may be copied, used or reproduced without our prior written consent. The Sentinella accepts no responsibility for alterations to events listed, claims made by our advertisers or information provided by our contributors. So there!

The Sentinella is eternally dedicated to Colin Checkley, the founder and editor of The Sentinel Magazine. May he rest in peace. (Born; 1960 Died; 2004)

By now a crowd of onlookers had formed, making comments such as; “Look, she’s a goner anyway. There’s nothing we can do to help….” And, “I’m not getting my coat all covered in blood…this cost me a hundred quid….”

www.thesentinella.com


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From The Ed (cont) The situation improved when a young builder stopped his white van, walked fearlessly over to the attacker and slid the knife out of her hand as she attempted to hack Julie’s head off. En-route to the hospital she drifted in and out of consciousness and after more than thirty stab wounds and against all odds, Julie managed to survive the frenzied attack to the utter astonishment of all the hospital staff. In the days, weeks and months that followed Julie’s recovery was aided by a voice she knew as Veritas. She often found herself outside of her body, just as she had during the attempted murder. Once she found herself swinging in the stars and on other occasions she literally bounced off the bedroom walls. The most remarkable thing about this true story is that despite everything, Julie learnt to love and forgive her attacker. And that’s the most profound lesson we can all take from Julie’s book…the power of forgiveness. A Stranger In Paradise is available from www.amazon.co.uk – it's a highly recommended read.

Keidi Keating

Editor (of the original little mag)!

A Taste Of What´s On This Month Useless Facts...............................Page 22 Love Quotes.................................Page 26 rose Facts....................................Page 39 Paparazzi.....................................Page 42 Delicious recipe..........................Page 51 amazing animals.........................Page 58 Film review..................................Page 80 share’o’scope............................Page 103 whats On....................................Page 112 information.................................Page 114 Puzzle Pages..............................Page 116 Jokes...........................................Page 118 star signs...................................Page 120

Strange News Father at 94! A 94-year-old farmer in India claims he has become the world's oldest father. Ramajit Raghav of Kharkhoda in Haryana, northern India, says his wife Shakuntala, who is in her 50s, gave birth to a son called Karamjit. The couple said their child's birth was ‘God's gift’ and Mr Raghav, who believes the secret to eternal youth is half a kilo of butter washed down with three litres of milk every day, did not rule out having more children. He is confident that he will be around to see his little boy grow up, adding: "I will die only if a black snake bites me and that is very unlikely." Doctors said that the child was delivered normally and is in good health. Snaking it... Nearly 1,000 people flocked to a wedding in Cambodia - between two snakes. Bride Chamreun, a 16ft python weighing 200lb, wed her smaller mate in Village One in Kandal province, just south of the capital Phnom Penh. Buddhist monks blessed the pair and villagers showered them with flowers during the twohour ceremony believed to bring prosperity and peace to those attending. "We organised the wedding ceremony for the pythons in order to oust bad things and bring good luck and happiness for our villages," said 41-year-old Neth Vy, who owns Chamreun. "We were told that the two pythons are husband and wife and they need to live together, and if we don't marry them we will meet bad luck." Mr Neth said he had found the then tiny python while fishing in 1994, and that she had become part of the family. The python groom, named Krong Pich, was caught 12 days ago by people in a neighbouring village.




Sunday Roast inc.glass of wine € 8.50 Bookings recommended

All Day English Breakfasts, Full Menu Open from 10am till late every day Scandanavian Special every Tuesday Karaoke every Saturday night

Quiz Night every Thursday from 8:30pm with cash prizes APARIV Charity Quiz last Friday of every month

C/Dr Maranon, Torre del Mar Tel: 952 544 362

Broadband internet No landline required Pay-as-u-go or contract 29€ inc. IVA per month. Pay for the months you use


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Valentine Facts

To get you in the mood for lurrrrrve!

73 per cent of people who buy flowers for Valentine's Day are men, while only 27 per cent are women. About 1 billion Valentine's Day cards are exchanged each year. That's the largest seasonal cardsending occasion of the year, next to Christmas. About 3 per cent of pet owners will give Valentine's Day gifts to their pets. Alexander Graham Bell applied for his patent on the telephone, an "Improvement in Telegraphy", on Valentine's Day, 1876. California produces 60 per cent of American roses, but the vast number sold on Valentine's Day in the United States are imported, mostly

from South America. Approximately 110 million roses, the majority red, will be sold and delivered within a three-day time period. Cupid, another symbol of Valentines Day, became associated with it because he was the son of Venus, the Roman god of love and beauty. Cupid often appears on Valentine cards holding a bow and arrows because he is believed to use magical arrows to inspire feelings of love. In the Middle Ages, young men and women drew names from a bowl to see who their valentines would be. They would wear these names on their sleeves for one week. To wear your heart on your sleeve now means that it is easy for other people to know how you are feeling.

The smoking place Electronic cigarettes

Switch to a healthier way of smoking any time, any place, anywhere. Less than half the price of normal cigarettes Suppliers of electronic cigarettes, cartridges & accessories Try before you buy Find us at the Country Farmers Market at Trapiche & markets at Puente don Manuel, Molina & Hippadromo Mijas Costa Start up kits 36.95â‚Ź which includes any opening offer of the equivalent of 80 cigarettes free Ring: 626 458 954 ask for Mandy or visit our website

www.thesmokingplace.com For online orders please quote LM Spain for the best discounts


Menu del Dia - 6.50€

Monday - Friday 12pm - 4pm

3 courses (including vegetarian)

Help yourself Buffet - Thursday & Sunday Adults - 9€ Children under 10 - 5€ 13.00 - 16.00

Includes various starters, mains, vegetarian dishes, rice and bread

Special Menu Monday to Saturday - 8.95€

Pappadam, Onion Bhajee / Vegetable Pakora / Vegetable Samosa, Prawn Puri & Chicken Tikka Chicken, Lamb, Prawn Vegetable - Vindaloo / Balti / Jalfrezi Tikka Masala / Korma / Dansak / Biryani / Chicken or Lamb Tikka Pilau Rice / Naan / Tea or Coffee

Avda Andalucia, Bloque Jupiter, Pasaje Timon 2, Calle Timon, Torre del Mar

Tel: 952 547 798 or 665 675 053 Open: 12.00 - 16.00 18.00 - 24.00 everyday www.publisur.net


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Laws Of Life How true are these..! anthony’s Law of the workshop: Any tool, when dropped, will roll to the least accessible corner. Bell’s theorem: As soon as the body is immersed fully in the bathtub, the telephone will ring. Brenda’s rule: At any event, the people whose seats are furthest from the aisle, arrive last. Cannon’s karmic Law: If you use the excuse that you were late for work because you had a flat tyre, the next morning you will actually have a flat tyre. kovac’s Conundrum: When you dial a wrong number, you never get an engaged tone. Lorenz’s Law of Mechanical repair: After your hands become coated with grease, your nose will begin to itch.

O’Brien’s Variation Law: If you change queues, the one you have left will start to move faster than the one you are in now. Owen’s Law: As soon as you sit down to a cup of hot coffee, your boss will ask you to do something which will last until the coffee is cold. ruby’s Principle of Close Encounters: The probability of meeting someone you know increases when you are in a situation where you do not want to be seen by anybody. willoughby’s Law: When you try to prove to the repair man that a machine doesn’t work, it will. wooly’s law: When you are working late, the boss will never be around. When you are surfing the net the boss will always drop by. Zadra’s Law of Biomechanics: The severity of the itch is inversely proportional to the reachability of the area.

RESTAURANTE ASIATICO

FENG

Lidl Fengs

Chinese New Year!! special Menu available until 14/02/11 * Various Starters * Peking Duck with Pancakes * Selection of Main Courses * Bottle of Wine & 2 glasses of Cava per couple * Dessert & Gift 29.95€ p.p.

Open every day 12.00 - 16.30 / 18.30 - 24.00

Avda. Andalucia To Nerja

Avda. Andalucia, 35 Bajo 29750 Algarrobo-Costa (Malaga)

Tel: 952 551 439 or 671 886 552



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Randon Jokes On the first day of college, the Dean addressed the students, pointing out some of the rules. “The female dormitory will be out-of-bounds for all male students, and the male dormitory to the female students. Anybody caught breaking this rule will be fined 20€ the first time.” He continued, “Anybody caught breaking this rule the second time will be fined 60€. Being caught a third time will incur a hefty fine of 180€. Are there any questions?” At this, a male student in the crowd inquired, “How much for a season pass?” ------------------------------------------------------------Bill, Jim, and Scott were at a convention together and were sharing a large suite on the top of a 75 storey skyscraper. After a long day of meetings they were shocked to hear that the elevators in their hotel were broken and they would have to climb 75 flights of stairs to get to their room. Bill said to Jim and Scott, let's break the monotony of this unpleasant task by concentrating on something interesting. I'll tell jokes for 25 flights, and Jim can sing songs for 25 flights, and Scott can tell sad stories the rest

of the way. At the 26th floor Bill stopped telling jokes and Jim began to sing. At the 51st floor Jim stopped singing and Scott began to tell sad stories. "I will tell my saddest story first," he said. "I left the room key in the car!" ------------------------------------------------------------Billy was at school this morning in the Aussie Outback and the teacher asked all the children what there fathers did for a living. All the typical answers came out, Fireman, Policeman, Salesman, Chippy, Captain of Industry etc, but Billy was being uncharacteristically quiet and so the teacher asked him about his father. "My father is an exotic dancer in a gay club and takes off all his clothes in front of other men. Sometimes if the offer is really good, he'll go out with a man, rent a cheap hotel room and let them sleep with him." The teacher quickly sets the other children some work and took little Billy aside to ask him if that was really true. "No" said Billy, "He plays cricket for Australia but I was just too embarrassed to say."

COSTA PROPERTIES

WE HAVE CLIENTS LOOKING FOR PROPERTIES IN THESE AREAS; TORROX PARK, TORROX COSTA, EL MORCHE AND SURROUNDING.

Do you have a property to Rent or Sell, then please contact COSTA PROPERTIES today for a fast result. With the lowest rates on the Costa at now just *2% for Sales* and *One Fee per Rental* We provide a friendly professional service. Choose the right one - COSTA PROPERTIES for your Rental and Sales needs today! torrox Park - Brisamar 2 Bedroom 400€ per month ref: CPr2011a

Contact one of our friendly staff on 658 612 209 or email: costarentals81@yahoo.com

torrox Park 2 Bedroom 80m2 130,000€ ref: CPs2011a


TAJ MAHAL - VENTA BAJA

9.50€

SPECIAL  MENU special menu

Monday - Thursday Day & Night (except Monday lunch) Poppadam & Pickles Selection of starters: vegetable samosa or pakora or onion bhaji or Prawn puri or Chicken tikka Main course: chicken, lamb, prawn or vegatable: Korma, Madras, Vindaloo, Balti, Jalfrezy, Rogan Josh, Tikka Masala, Karahi, Biriyani or Chicken or Lamb Tikka Accompaniments: Plain or Pilau rice. Plain, Garlic, Cheese or Onion Nan Bread or Chapati Ali & his staff promise to continue serving their cuisine to it’s usual high standard, using only fresh ingredients that are freshly cooked to order, ensuring the Taj Mahal (Puente) is the BEST Curry House in Andalucía FrEE Pappadam with Mango Chutney & Pickle tray with all meals

takeaways available Free Pappadam & pickle with takeaways

Menu del Dia Mon-Fri 12pm - 4pm 3 courses €5.95 with veg. curry €6.95 with meat/prawn curry

Opening hours 12pm - 4pm and 6pm - 12am every day (closed Monday lunch) Puente don Manuel (Chiringuito antonio) tel: 952 510 886 Mob: 667 934 731

CHIRINGUITO ANTONIO

A warm welcome to all - A great mix of Spanish & English Events in February The only place in the area for Everyday 1pm - 2.30pm get a FREE surprise Hot Stone cooking tapa with every drink

Car Park Large Fireplace Jacket Potatoes

OFFER! Bacon Roll

(English Bacon)

& Coffee

2.50€

Very Large Terrace Full Tapas Bar Varied Menu Friday Market

Every Tuesday in February 7.30pm - 9.30pm Chinese Menu

NOW OPEN ‘DISCO CHIMENEA’ Thurs - Sunday

Celebrate Valentines with us on 12th February from 8pm. Live Music with the amazing “Mr. Sister”. Romantic 3 course meal with a bottle of wine and a gift for the ladies - 25€ per person

Telephone: 695 635 242

25th February Live Spanish Music with 3 course meal and wine 10€ per person

Turn right at Cruce de Periana, find us 500m on the right at Venta Baja


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De Cotta Lost in Translation? The importance of excellence in legal translations. In many areas of our lives we are not affected by the occasional errors or misunderstandings that arise when working or communicating in a different language. However in a legal proceeding or in advising on legal matters the need for accurate translations is essential. In Spain there is a recognised title of legal interpreter which allows a person to present translations in the Courts and these will be recognised by both parties as valid and accurate. In criminal proceedings an individual has the right to a translation of the charges when he or she is charged with a criminal offence so that he or she understands the charges made against them. In criminal trials the defendant and or essential witnesses also have the right to an interpreter. This can be difficult in areas

where there is a lack of people with sufficient language skills and a poor translation in a proceeding can be challenged. In civil proceedings the parties have the right to bring a translator with them and this is particularly important if there are technical issues to be discussed. Lawyers are sometimes accused of being pedantic about language but in our experience a lot can depend on a correct interpretation or translation. An example of this would be in statements made about English law on divorce where the division of assets is normally 50/50 after any children are provided for even though the phrase separacion de bienes is often used in referring to English divorce proceedings - simply to translate this phrase as separation of assets without further explanation from an English lawyer can lead to a fundamental misunderstanding of English divorce law. One word can make a difference; for example the word repossession seems straightforward enough in English but in a timeshare or community proceeding in Spain it is very important to ensure that it is correctly translated if it is to give legal rights. Spanish Judges often call for proof of English law so a proper translation is essential when the court has to consider how they should interpret documents and evidence or certificates of English law. Sandra Wrightson is a Barrister Overseas, registered with the Bar Council of England and Wales, and partner at De Cotta McKenna & SantafĂŠ, a law firm offering support with all aspects of Spanish Law for English speaking clients with offices in Mijas-Costa, CoĂ­n, Granada and Tenerife. De Cotta McKenna y Santafe Calle Diputacion 6, 2o, 29780 Nerja, Spain Tel (00 34) 952 52 71 14 Fax (00 34) 952 52 34 28 Website: www.decottalaw.com


To advertise call 664 210 468 or email sales@thesentinella.com

15

Solutions 4 U Legal Services

the Estate Agent that is marketing the property.

We are now devoting much time to resolving paperwork issues for property owners. With all the negative press regarding ‘illegal’ properties in Andalucia, it’s vital that our home, normally a person’s biggest investment, is properly registered and inscribed, to avoid any problems with the authorities. It’s important that the Title Deed (Escritura) to the property is up to date and fully describes the property that exists. This has often been overlooked in the past and since owning the property many people have built extensions or swimming pools and haven’t realised that thereafter the Deed needs to be updated to include these constructions, as it doesn’t get registered automatically. Plus there are occasions that we find that plot numbers are listed wrongly as are often the land measurements. We therefore offer a FREE initial consultation to check out these matters and give you an independent, impartial review of your Spanish property paperwork.

Our legal services also include the drawing up of a Will for your Spanish property, extremely important to ensure that your wishes regarding inheritance are carried out, rather than the State taking over the distribution of your assets. And in the event of a death we take care of the inheritance process for the family as quickly and economically as possible, trying to reduce the costs to a minimum, as this can be a costly process that many families are not prepared for.

We also carry out Purchase/Sale conveyancing for any customers buying a property privately, or who do not wish to use the ‘in house’ Lawyer of

For all our services, we give a full explanation of the process in English of course, so that our customers understand what needs to be done and why, and we give written estimates for our work. This gives people assurance that the final invoice they will be presented with is not open ended and likely to cost them far more than anticipated. In this way we hope to give a good, long term service to our customers. If you would like to discuss matters in private, call Solutions 4 U, Office telephone: 952 55 38 07 or Mobile 660 51 01 34 for an appointment. Email: info@solutions4u-competa.com

GENERAL AUCTION Saturday 2nd April at 5pm

Legal Services  English Legal Advisor & Experienced Lawyer Specialising In:

To be held at: El Trapiche Restaurant Ctra.Triana/Benamargosa km 0.1 Trapiche, Velez Malaga

PProperty Legalisations PCatastro & Border Corrections  PAddition of Swimming Pools or  Extensions to your Title Deed

PProperties without Deeds PSale /Purchase Conveyancing PInheritance Process & Wills

A Quick, Professional & Impartial Service Estimates Given Call for a FREE consultation & get your

property papers checked out. Don´t lose a sale due to paperwork inconsistencies

Solutions 4 U, Cómpeta Office  Tel: 952 55 38 07 or 660 51 01 34 Email: info@solutions4u-competa.com

Lots to arrive 10am - 12.30pm Viewing from 3pm - 5pm

For Details/Reservations  Tel: 657 399 995   619 471 301


Paul Atkins Motors TOYOTA AURIS Diesel 3dr 2008 Spanish Only 70,000kms Cruise, Keyless Fully loaded FORD ESCORT Diesel Estate 1995 RHD Spanish plates POA

KIA SPORTAGE Petrol Spanish 4x4 5 door manual POA

VAUXHALL OMEGA Turbo Diesel Estate English 2.5L POA

RENAULT SCENIC 2004 1.9 Diesel RHD English Good condition  POA

FIAT PUNTO 1.4 Automatic Petrol 2000 Spanish Plates LHD POA

MITSUBISHI PAJERO 1995 2.8 diesel 7 seats POA

HONDA CRV 2000 2L Petrol English plates RHD POA

PEUGEOT 306 1.4l 3dr 1998 Petrol Spanish POA

Ford ranger 4dr Pick up ‘01 Diesel Spanish

CORSA 1.4L Petrol 5dr White 2001 Spanish Very Clean POA

toyota rav 4 5dr Auto 2001

ROLLS  ROYCE

Wedding Hire Service Special Occasions Call: 663 515 341 or 655 251 207

Valeting

Wash, leather & vac - from 6€ Wash, leather, vac, dash clean, tyre & bumper black - from 12€ Full Valet - from 22€ ALSO….. Tailored valets, Dust removal, Dog hair removal, Polishing, Stain removal, Wheel trim re-painting, Chrome polishing & much more... For more information call: 663 515 341 or 655 251 207


MeCHAniCAL

TyReS

WeLDinG

FROM CLASSiCS TO MODeRn DAy CARS

Paul Atkin

Car Mechanic, Body Repairs & Tyres WILL BUY EMERGENCY  CALL OUT ENGLISH Large Premises SERVICE CARS Tyres: New & Part Worn Wheel Balancing Punctures

Unwanted Vehicles removed

SERVICES!!

we will act as your agent & sell your vehicle

Dents, Scratches, Welding, ITV Failures, Servicing, Insurance, Crash Repairs Grúa Services, Secure Parking 663 515 341 / 655 251 207

To Vinuela

Email:casa-atkin@hotmail.com

We are here A-402

Garden Centre To Vinuela To Puente don Manuel

To Periana

Directions: Take the Vinuela turning off the A-402, at the Garden Centre turn right and we are at the end of the road “Look for the Mannequin”


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Linea Directa LÍNEa DirECta with YOU Via its International Department, Línea Directa offers all foreign policyholders residing in spain customer service by telephone in both English and german. As a result, customers can take out their policy, make any type of enquiry, present claims, send documentation and enjoy 24 hour road assistance, all in their own language, with a single call to 902 352 325, at a time which is convenient for them, whatever product they have purchased. In addition, the same department offers its policyholders a translation service for dealing with repair garages. The customer service in English is the only one in Spain which also makes it possible for the customer to make contact by telephone from outside spain, by calling 0034 91 807 49 06 from a mobile phone or 0034 902 325 325 from a landline

Online service Línea Directa also offers all its foreign policyholders living in Spain the possibility of making all their enquiries and carrying out all operations by email at 902325325@lineadirecta.es. If customers write to this address, they will receive a quick, personalised reply in their own language to any type of question they might have or any enquiry they wish to make about their insurance. By dealing directly with policyholders, offering them a personalised service and committing itself to excellence and quality, Línea Directa has become the 5th largest Spanish insurer in only 15 years, with over 1.7 million customers. Included in this figure are over 60,000 foreign policyholders residing in Spain, who enjoy all the marvellous benefits which Línea Directa offers all its expatriate customers. If you wish to find out more, call 902 123 104 now.



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Excuse Notes Actual sick notes from around the globe...

in his side.

My son is under the doctor's care and should not take P.E. today, wrote a parent. Please execute him.

Please excuse Ray Friday from school. He has very loose vowels.

Dear School: Please eckuse John being absent on Jan. 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, and also 33.

Please excuse Pedro from being absent yesterday. He had (several mispellings of diarrhea crossed out) the s***s.

Please excuse Gloria from Jim today. She is administrating.

Irving was absent this morning because he missed his bust.

Please excuse Roland from P.E. for a few day. Yesterday he fell out of a tree and misplaced his hip.

Please excuse Jimmy for being. It was his father's fault.

John has been absent because he had two teeth taken off his face.

I kept Billie home because she had to go Christmas shopping because I don't know what size she wear.

Carlos was absent yesterday because he was playing football. He was hurt in the growing part.

Please excuse Harriet for missing school yesterday. We forget to get the Sunday paper off the porch and when we found it Monday, we thought it was Sunday.

Mary could not come to school because she has been bothered by very close veins. Chris will not be in school cus he has an acre

Please excuse Mary from being absent yesterday. She was in bed with gramps.


Vanessa´s Traditional Sunday Lunch to share Chicken, Pork or Beef Always very popular so book early! 3 courses from 20€ per couple

The Lemon Tree “El Limonero” Lounge Bar

Light Bites & Specials served every evening Open Thursdays & Fridays from 6pm

Now Open from 1pm Saturdays & Sundays A GREAT PLACE TO BE!

1st Saturday of the month - Table top sale 10am til 3pm Food available. Why not pop in or call for table space? Saturday Special Menu del Dia - 2 course meal plus coffee 7.95€ p.p. Monday 14th February - Make it a special event! Book your Valentine’s Supper now!!!! Private functions catered for Calle Vienteocho de Febrero Riogordo (Turn right and right again at the Painted Star on the road)

Por informacion: the-lemon-tree@hotmail.co.uk

Call: 620 3535 94

Find us on


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le e s U

ts c a ss F

ss sele ! u e ing y ar The t amaz u b

In 10 minutes, a hurricane releases more energy than all the world's nuclear weapons combined. On average, 100 people choke to death on ballpoint pens every year. Only one person in two billion will live to be 116 or older. The Main Library at Indiana University sinks over an inch every year because when it was built, engineers failed to take into account the weight of all the books that would occupy the building. Table tennis balls have been known to travel off the paddle at speeds up to 160 km/hr.

In ancient Egypt, priests plucked EVERY hair from their bodies, including their eyebrows and eyelashes. The original story from "Tales of 1001 Arabian Nights" begins, "Aladdin was a little Chinese boy." The volume of the earth's moon is the same as the volume of the Pacific Ocean. Honey is the only natural food that is made without destroying any kind of life. A snail can sleep for three years. Michael Jordan makes more money from NIKE annually than all of the Nike factory workers in Malaysia combined. The cigarette lighter was invented before the match. Americans on average eat 18 acres of pizza every day. Chinese Crested dogs can get acne.


Mobile Tyre Fitting Service

Service with oil & filter from

45â‚Ź inc. IVA

Free Brake Check Guaranteed best prices on the coast for all makes of tyres

Air-con re-charge

41â‚Ź inc. IVA

Pro Neumaticos


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Puns For The Educated Minds Very clever..... 1. The fattest knight at King Arthur's round table was Sir Cumference. He acquired his size from too much pi. 2. I thought I saw an eye doctor on an Alaskan island, but it turned out to be an optical Aleutian .

8. Two hats were hanging on a hat rack in the hallway. One hat said to the other: "You stay here; I'll go on a head." 9. I wondered why the baseball kept getting bigger. Then it hit me. 10. A sign on the lawn at a drug rehab centre said: "Keep off the Grass."

3. A rubber band pistol was confiscated from algebra class, because it was a weapon of math disruption.

11. The soldier who survived mustard gas and pepper spray is now a seasoned veteran.

4. No matter how much you push the envelope, it'll still be stationery.

12. When cannibals ate a missionary, they got a taste of religion.

5. A dog gave birth to puppies near the road and was cited for littering.

13. If you jumped off the bridge in Paris, you'd be in Seine.

6. Two silk worms had a race. They ended up in a tie.

14. Two fish swim into a concrete wall. One turns to the other and says, "Dam!"

7. A hole has been found in the nudist camp wall. The police are looking into it.

15. A backward poet writes inverse.


Winter is here! Will you be using your Terrace / Balcony this winter? You could still be using it through the wind and rain The answer

Glass Curtains!

Spring Madness! First 6 orders - up to 50% off!

Glass Balustrade

Pool fencing

Product Benefits: w w w w w w w w

Mr. & Mrs. Goddard, Arenas

Doesn’t spoil views Folds neatly away Elimates dust and dirt No need to bring furniture inside Warmer winter homes Increases value to property Adds security Reduces noise

Other Products

Replacement Windows/Doors ---Glass cut to size ---Shower screens ---Repairs to all Glass Products ---Conservatories ---Solar Film Call Glass Curtains Direct on:

Office - 952 931 464 Mobile - 626 458 954 Email: glasscurtainsdirect@gmail.com www.firstglasscurtains.net


26

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Love Quotes As it’s Valentines Day this month, we have thrown in some deep and meaningful Love Quotes to think about! If you love somebody, set them free. If they return, they were always yours. If they don’t, they never were. Friendship often ends in love; but love in friendship - never. You don’t love a woman because she is beautiful, but she is beautiful because you love her. Love has nothing to do with what you are expecting to get, it’s what you are expected to give — which is everything. Love builds bridges where there are none.

Love is like the sun coming out of the clouds and warming your soul. Life without love is like a tree without fruit. To the world you may be one person, but to one person you may be the world. A lawful kiss is never worth a stolen one. Age does not protect you from love, but love to some extent protects you from age. The greatest thing you’ll ever learn is just to love and be loved in return. Only love let’s us see normal things in an extraordinary way.

Love can sometimes be magic. But magic can sometimes…just be an illusion.

There’s always room for love; You just have to move a few things around.

The definition of a beautiful woman is one who loves me.

Love means never having to say you’re sorry

SAT. CO

invites you to our no obligation demonstration of High definition (HD) Television Technology. Held every Saturday starting 2pm near Hotel Viñuela. Ring to book your place. 657 484 853 (Free drinks and nibbles while you enjoy the demonstration!)

FreeSat+HD, Sky+ HD, Spanish TV, 3DTV etc.


To advertise call 664 210 468 or email sales@thesentinella.com

27

Love Quotes (Continued) If you judge people, you have no time to love them

Love is the master key which opens the gates of happiness.

Love me and the world is mine.

Love is the greatest refreshment in life.

Love is an irresistible desire to be irresistibly desired.

Love is the silent saying and saying of a single name.

Are we not like two volumes of one book?

Love is being stupid together.

The most beautiful view is the one I share with you.

Love is not finding someone to live with; it’s finding someone you can’t live without.

Love is friendship set on fire.

Never sign a valentine with your own name.

Anyone can be passionate, but it takes real lovers to be silly.

It is never too late to fall in love. The first duty of love is to listen

Oh, if it be to choose and call thee mine, love, thou art every day my Valentine! The way to love anything is to realise that it might be lost.

I don’t understand why Cupid was chosen to represent Valentine’s Day. When I think about romance, the last thing on my mind is a short, chubby toddler coming at me with a toy.


DENtist Dr Bakri

*Dental Cosmetics *Implants Crowns & Bridges Algarrobo Costa Tel: 952 55 05 21

Torrox Costa Tel: 952 53 20 12

Emergencies: 678 974 892

English Dental Technician Over 20 years experience Fully Qualified Denture Repairs Adjustments / Duplications Based in Torrox Pueblo We can visit if needed Call Graham for confidential advice on any denture problem on: 952 539 219 / 622 719 640

TONY PHILLIPS

Van & trailers. Light haulage, removals up to 25m3, car & boat transport. Vinuela based, 25 years experience. Local or anywhere in Europe. Regular Spain-UK-Spain trips. Phone 636 844 209 E-mail: hazeltony@live.co.uk

MR ‘wants CLUTTER your goods’ *House and Garage clearances *Shops and Bars - old stock * Now buying; Antiques, Gold & Jewellery Call David on: 686 375 089 or email a list to: cullimores@hotmail.com Cash available and efficient service

“So DoN’T BE A NUTTER,

SELL iT To MR CLUTTER ”

COLONiC irrigatiON A HEALTHY MOVE

Cleaning of the Colon A detox Enjoy: clearer skin, increased energy, weight loss, mental clarity and more... Call Eileen: 951 167 238 or 609 811 879 (near Hotel Vinuela)

Carousel

Secondhand Furniture Shop

Open Mon - Fri 9.30am - 2pm & Sat - 9.30am - 1pm Book exchange available on ground floor

“House Clearances” Call Gilly on: 630 211 907 La Vinuela Pueblo (Down steps at side of Bank)

MAN & VAN! Anytime...Anywhere

Locally based 12 cubic metres €25 per hour Small Loads to U.K Phone Mark:  669 255 968


To advertise call 664 210 468 or email sales@thesentinella.com

29

Deep Deep Thoughts The only true wisdom is in knowing you know nothing.

A friend is someone who has the same enemies you have.

A wise man does not need advice and a fool won’t take it.

The chief danger in life is that you may take too many precautions.

He who can, does. He who can’t, teaches.

The world belongs to the enthusiast who keeps cool.

Life becomes useless and insipid when we have no longer either friends or enemies. It is better to stay silent and be thought a fool, than to open one’s mouth and remove all doubt. Teamwork…means never having to take all the blame yourself. I no longer have the fear of being alone. It’s cool to find out that you don’t need a boyfriend to be happy. Never put off until tomorrow what you can avoid all together. Being cool, is not trying to be cool.

Having one child makes you a parent; having two makes you a referee. Being yourself is being the person everyone else wants you to be. If you want truly to understand something, try to change it. Be of use, but don’t be used. Winners never quit and quitters never win. A conclusion is simply the place where you got tired of thinking.


TORROX Traditional Indian Restaurant

Full A La Carte Menu with ‘Winter Special Offers’ Laguna Beach, Torrox Costa Tel: 951 239 670 Mob: 677 334 721 Opening Hours Tuesday - Sunday 2pm - Late Closed Mondays

T he Be st Cli ma

t Monday Marke


X COSTA

mate in Europe

Lighthouse LEws Fish & ChiPs traditional English Fish & Chips Eat in or take away Edf ruselo, avda Faro tel: 952 532 633 Now showing ‘Live English Football’


32

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a t s o C ToSererpoagxes 30 - 41 xC Torro

osta

r

e ut it h ll abo ead a

re!

russells British store have a great stock of favourite British products, we have a frozen foods section and also stock cleaning products, toiletries and even pet food. Each month we have special offers in store, so call in to find out our offers for February. Don't forget Valentine’s Day, we have boxes of chocolates and in our other store across the road Russells Regalos, a wide range of cards for all occasions and gifts.

quiz night. Darts night is on Wednesdays in our upstairs darts room. Thursday night is Karaoke, Friday night live music and Sunday live sports and Sunday Lunches. Visit The Continental for Scotland on the Costa. Lads & Dads Barber shop with 20 yrs expe-

All day, everyday at the Continental Cafe Bar & Bistro we serve roast meat meals. Choose from beef, lamb, pork, gammon or chicken with as many vegetables as you like or only 6.90â‚Ź. Pizzas are now available on our snack menu. Join us on Tuesday nights from 9pm for our fun rience. Whether you prefer mobile or an appointment, both catered for, or just pop in. Visit the Light of india Indian Restaurant Laguna Beach, with a full a la carte menu. For reputable building and contents insurance, car insurance, private medical insurance, pets insurance, funeral plans and more, contact Lewis insurance services.


Bar/Cafeteria: Business Opportunity in the heart of Torrox Costa a 75m2 bar/cafeteria with terrace, f/f kitchen with machinery. Rental only 800€ per month, 6 mths in advance plus 1000€ deposit. Start the New Year with a new business in a great location. Serious enquiries only please Call 651 956 284 for more information. shop: A modern office in the heart of Torrox Costa for rent. Formerly an estate agency so comes with some agency furniture and display equipment. Main and separate Managers office, wc with basin, alarm system. 450€ per month. Call 651 956 284 for more information

and includes two double bedrooms, lounge, separate very large dining room, open plan kitchen, gardens, terraces and enclosed swimming pool and hens, so plenty of free range eggs available. The gardens, pool and hens can be maintained by the owner if so wished, for no extra charge! Available now and a complete removals service is offered for rentals of 6 months or more. Call 651 956 284 for more information or to arrange a viewing. rebeccah Curtis wellbeing Centre helping you to kick start your new year with feeling great. Vibrate away the pounds during February, buy a 10 session voucher for 30€ and receive an extra 5 sessions FREE! making 15 sessions for only 30€. Also on offer during February buy a 10 session voucher for the Passive exercise couch for 50€ and receive an extra 5 sessions FREE making 15 sessions for only 50€. Regular use of the toning table results in the pelvis, back muscles, rib cage and shoulders being re-educated and re-aligned. Need a Valentine gift, we have a special offer on Larome perfume normally 20€ for 100ml now 10€ during February whilst stocks last. Devour traditional English fish & chips from Lew´s Fish & Chips, eat in or take away!

apartment: In the heart of Torrox Costa, with all amenities on hand, this two bedroom apartment is available for long term rental. The property is fully furnished. Only 450€ per mth. Call 651 956 284 for more information. Villa: Fantastic stylish Rustic Villa in Torrox, on the Torrox/Frigiliana Road available for Long Term Rental at 650€ per month. Approximately 100m2 the property is available fully furnished


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a t s o C ToSererpoagxes 30 - 41 Start your New Year with a great way to keep fit and make new friends. Learn to dance with Yo Jive, Modern Jive classes. A fusion of Jive, Salsa, Latin and a bit more. You don't need a partner, come by yourself or bring a friend. Every Tues night at 8.30pm at El Ancla, a fabulous location right on the beach,Torrox Costa on C/Penoncillo, N340 betweenTorrox & Nerja. Beginners always welcome. Join us at restaurante El Pino in Torrox Park. 2 for 1 meals only 6.95â‚Ź Mon-Thurs. Fri night Fish & Chips buy 2 meals get a free bottle of wine & Sun. lunches we have an early bird option, eat before 1.30pm buy 1 receive 1 half price! Sun. lunches served from 12.30pm 9.30pm. Happy Hour on Mon to Thurs 5 - 8pm & Sat during football matches. St Valentines Night on Monday 14th Feburary we have a

Beatles Tribute Night which includes a 3 course meal and bottle of wine. A great night out with the one you love or just your friends. Call in or phone us for more info. Caribe All you can eat buffet on Sundays. International Brunch between 10am -12pm and Lunch Buffet Carvery Style between 13:30 and 16:30. Valentines Night from 19:00 onwards enjoy a 3 course dinner, wine and cava included for 19â‚Ź per person. Every Monday at Los amigos line dancing from 7pm, Karaoke with Rockin Robin on a Friday night from 9pm, Every Sun. Chill Jam Sessions with Dr. Dave and friends from 8.30pm. We also have a table top sale on Sat 5th Feb at 10am and on Wed 9th Feb. a 60's night with Rocking Robin. Wed 2nd & 16th Feb we have our quiz night from 9pm. Wed 23rd Feb. Country & Western Night with Rocking Robin and Saturday 26th Feb. Banjo George & the Sunshine Skiffle Band.


CLINICA EUROPA

C S

English Dentist:

Medicine

Dr. Michael Mannish B.D.S. (univ. of London)

w General Medicine

DENTAL EMERGENCIES -

w Paediatrics

648 203 157

Harley St. Dentist of 25 years

w Physiotherapy, Osteopherapy

Take advantage of your free 2nd opinion

w Acupuncture

before you start your treatment. Competitive prices

w Esthetic anti-ageing Medicine without surgery

teeth(call whitening in 1 hour for more information)

w Special Treatment for Fibromyalgia

New: Implant specialist

Centro Internacional, Blq. 86, TORROX COSTA

Tel: 952 53 09 08

clinicaeuropatorroxcosta@gmail.com

HARLEKIN BAR - CAFÉ Now open early till late everyday!!

DraUght BEErs

gOOD FOOD

san Miguel John smiths Paulaner alhambra

See our Daily Specials Board

Come and join Robert, Nicole & Andreea for Good Company and Good Food. Relax and enjoy one of our Great Beers, a glass of wine or something a little stronger!

Hotel Riu

Block 6

Torrox Costa

e We ar

Sunday Roast Lunch (Bookings Advisable)

here

Bar FOOD

Burgers sandwiches toasties all Day Breakfasts

Authentic indian Curries TORROX COSTA For more info:

952 531 804

All Sporting Action Live on Big Screens


hotel riu Torrox Costa

Hair by Patsy:

Cuts, re-style, colour & tints, foil highlights, perming or just wash and blow dry. our Salon also offers Beauty & Massage treatments including Reflexology and indian Head Massage. Gift Vouchers available. For an appointment call: Patsy: 679 562 328 Mo: 663 564 699 Hotel: 952 52 75 94 Ask for the Peluqueria tuesdays - saturdays 10am - 7pm

Casa Maria Sky Sports

Jam Night - Mondays

(with hosts “Flip” & “Aqui te Partie”)

Wii Night - Wednesdays - 6pm

ESPN

Happy Hour Everyday 17.30 - 19.00 (1€ bottle, 2€ pint San Miguel, 1€ glass of wine)

Saturday 5th February - Live Music with Johnny Hollywood from 9pm

Saturday 26th February - Live Music with Luxaka from 9pm Parties & Functions catered for Open 11am - Late 7 days a week Call: 667 954 901 or 664 259 968 TORROX PARK (bar on the goat track)



Sue & Carsten offer you a very warm welcome

We have new Danish & English specialities on the menu, come in and be inspired. NEW !! NEW !! Jam session every Tuesday night at 8 o'clock Karaoke every Friday night at 8 o'clock Wednesday 16 February - International quiz night starting at 8 o'clock

Open from 11am - 7 days a week

Tel: 952 967 734

Find us on Paseo Maritimo, Torrox Costa At the end of Avda. El Faro, down the steps and we are on the right just before Flamenco Fusion


To advertise call 664 210 468 or email sales@thesentinella.com

39

Rose Facts It's Looking Rosy! A blooming brilliant collection of rose facts, just in time for Valentine's Day! Roman Emperor Nero liked to shower his guests with fresh rose petals. According to the legend, the dense rose-petal cloud nearly suffocated some of the guests. In the Middle Ages, it was customary for the wealthy to put rose petals and rose oil in their baths. Many noblewomen carried bouquets of fragrant flowers to cover body odors. The largest rose ever bred was a pink rose measuring approximately 33 inches in diameter. It was bred by Nikita K. Rulhoksoffski from San Onofre, California. The world's largest rosebush is a white Lady Banksia located in Tombstone, Arizona. It's original root came over from Scotland in 1885. From a single trunk, which is nearly six feet in diameter, it spreads over an arbor that covers over 8,000

square feet, enough to shelter a crowd of 150 people. The world's oldest living rose is believed to be 1,000 years old. It grows on the wall of the Cathedral of Hildesheim in Germany and its presence is documented since A.D. 815. The largest private rose garden in the world is in Cavriglia, Italy, and holds over 7,500 different varieties of roses. The only rose known to have only four petals is Rosa Sericea, brought to Europe form the Himalayas at the end of the nineteenth century. At first, rose oil was added to medicine to mask the bitter taste. It was only afterwards that the medicinal virtues of rose oil were discovered. The buds of the smallest rose, "Si", are the size of a grain of rice.


Not just Ribs!!! We specialise in Ribs, Wings, Steaks & Chicken

Events w 1st February - 10 year Anniversary Live Music and Buffet - 7.30pm Credit Cards taken w 14th February - Valentine’s Day 5 course Candlelit Dinner with Live Bookings advisable Music - 7.30pm for 8pm w 7th March - Carnival Party with Quiz night last Saturday in Snacks & Live Music the month torrox Costa - Block 88 (Next to tennis courts & auto 2000) tel: 95 253 2369 / 696 516 534 Closed Mondays

Heat up your home in a healthy and economical way! Infrared Design Heating System: Pictures, Mirrors, Glass, Blackboards, Columns etc. -Very economical to run and maintenance free -Partial storage heater keeps running times lower -No air circulation, so dust is not dispersed -Simple installation -Prevents dampness Picture heater abstract -Electrosmog free

Contact us or visit the exhibition at our shop: Redwell, Dipl.- Ing. Svend Scharler, Avda. El Faro, Bl. 75, bajo 9, Torrox Costa phone: 952539742, mobile: 606423869, Email: sscharler@gmx.de

www.redwell.com, www.redwell.es


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41

About Torrox History and facts about Torrox Surface Area: 50 square kilometres Population: 16,395 What the natives are called: Torroxeños. Nickname: Hocicones Torrox is proud to be named the place with the best climate in Europe. It is divided into three areas: Torrox Costa, Torrox Pueblo and El Morche. Torrox Costa is one of only two towns along the coast of Axarquia that has high rise apartment blocks along its central coastal stretch. This is compensated for by two splendid maritime promenades with attractive restaurants and bars and 9 kilometres of wide sandy beaches. On either side of the main area, you will find more rustic, low rise buildings and bamboo fringed beaches. torrox Costa, a resort only some some 4 kilometres (2 miles) from Torrox with beautiful beaches, promenade, restaurants, shops, night life, tennis courts, swimming pools, etc. It is this combination of old and new which makes Torrox such an interesting place to stay. Here you can have a quiet villa holiday in the Torrox countryside with the convenience of easy access to modern Costa del Sol holiday resort facilities torrox Pueblo has retained its white Moorish village structure with attractive narrow streets and a main square that is a lively meeting place. Much of the town has beautiful views down to the coast. El Morche, on the coast to the west of Torrox Costa, is a small, unspoilt seaside village. To the east of the main town, alongside the lighthouse, the new 'Balconde Torrox' has been constructed as a lookout to the sea and headlands. There is a transparent floor through which Roman ruins can be seen. During February it’s Carnival time in Torrox, a festival that had been allowed to fade out in

years gone by, but now recuperated for the enjoyment of everybody. In spring there is Holy Week, and later on, in May, the Cruces de Mayo. Local custom demands that one tries the arropía, a type of syrup of Moorish origin. On 13th June there is the Festival of San Antonio, which is especially relevant in the barrio of Ntra. Sra. de las Nieves. The Night of San Juan is on 24th June, and the local tradition here is to head for the beach and wash away the evil spirits. The festival in honour of the Virgen de las Nieves and San Roque, patron saints of the town, take place on 5th August, and finally, the festival of the Candelaria, with lighted candles in the streets, takes place in September. Torrox has a busy festive calendar all the year round, its most important festival being from October 4th and 8th. The Fiesta de las Migas takes place on the last Sunday before Christmas, a festival in which visitors to the town can sample this exquisite dish accompanied by a glass of wine from the area and music and dancing in the streets.


42

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zzi

. rld wo !! b ele NIE e c .. AR h t f ly. ’s o d on A ale an e m e one h t th th, on ly be m n s i o Th can It

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Planet Hollywood theme restaurants. 7. He has made over 28 movies. 8. He has twice set the standard as the highest paid actor in Hollywood; first in 1991 with Terminator II, for which he earned a reported 20 million dollars, then again in 2000 for Terminator III for which he earned a reported 30 million dollars. 9. He is married to Maria Shriver and he has four children.

Profile Name: Arnold Schwarzenegger Birthday: 30th July, 1947 Age: 63 Sign: Leo Birthplace: Thal, Austria Facts about arnold schwarzenegger: 1. Arnold Schwarzenegger was the 38th governor of the US State of California. He stepped down from this position on the 3rd January 2011. He was the state's Republican governor for seven years. He is also known as a famous bodybuilder, actor and businessman. 2. In 1968 at the age of 21, Schwarzenegger moved to the United States even though he spoke very little English. He would continue to weight train and lift competitively to eventually gain his first Mr. Olympia title in New York in 1970. 3. Schwarzenegger became active as an actor in 1970 with his debut in Hercules in New York. He would continue to act professionally until 2004. 4. He was the youngest ever Mr. Universe, at the age of 20. He has won the title five times (two amateur and three professional). 5. He Holds over 18 titles in body building and power lifting. 6. Arnie is the former owner of

10. He became Governor of California in 2003 after the recall election. 11. Childhood friends said that Schwarzenegger often stated his goals of going to America, winning many body building titles, becoming a famous actor, marrying a Kennedy, and being a politician….mission accomplished! 12. After its success in Terminator, “I’ll be back” became Arnold’s catchphrase which he used in many of his other films including Commando, Raw Deal, The Running Man, Total Recall, and Last Action Hero. 13. Arnold did not accept his Governator's salary of $175,000 per year, and instead donated it to charities. 14. He is called by the Guinness Book of World Records, "the most perfectly developed man in the history of the world."


hOtEL BaLCON DE CÓMPEta C/San Antonio, 75 Cómpeta

Tel: 952 55 36 62

Email: info@hotel-competa.com

Fax: 952 51 67 80

www.hotel-competa.com

Please note - the road is closed below the Hotel. Please come via Camino de Circunvalación and Avenida de Canillas. Please call for more info if required.

February - The Lover’s Month Valentine´s Day - 12th February

Cocktail on arrival Strawberry Passion Fizz Starters Fondue of English Cheddar with Nachos and Avocado, Prawn & Orange Cocktail Main Course Lemon scented Sole Fillets with Chorizo and Basil flavoured Mash or Loin of Pork with Creamy Mash, Sage & Onion and Cómpeta Sauce We also have a Vegetarian Option Dessert Chocolate Fountain with Fruit Kebab Molton Chocolate and Bailey´s “Pots of Love” Bottle of wine per couple Live Music with Barry Marx & Mariachi Nuevo Leon Presents, Prizes & Lots of Surprises!!!

19€ per person For that extra special evening add one night of luxury for just 30€ pp bookings recommended

Restaurante Maria

Everyone welcome inc. non-residents Fine Dining at Modest Prices Enjoy crisp, white table linen, friendly service and carefully prepared dishes in our elegant restaurant Open Fridays, Saturdays & Sundays 7.30pm - 10.00pm Special menu of the month!! 3 courses & a bottle of Rioja per couple - 15€pp To further enhance your evening stay the night for only 23€pp including breakfast Bookings recommended Present this advert to receive your FREE gift!

Semana Blanca

Saturday Sunday Friday 5th March 6th March 4th March * Fancy Dress * Archery * Presentation Party from 6pm. (midday) on the history of All children 20€ per person Cómpeta must be accompanied by Book in advance (starts at 11am) an adult. Followed by 3€ per person * Brain Teasers Treasure Hunt (inc. one drink 5pm 3€ per person specified 1€ per entry Book in advance on day)

Half Board Accommodation inc. activities (except Archery) from 45€ per person (minimum 2 night stay)

Book your holidays in the Hotel now during February for 2011 and receive Half Board upgrade for FREE!


Save up to 50% compared to conventional retaining walls

Dry-stone Gabion Walls Do it yourself or we supply and erect. Up to 50% saving against conventionally built stone walls

Do it yourself kits supplied with full instructions and advice or we can supply and erect using our own fully qualified staff. All products delivered direct from the manufacturer in the UK No planning required No architects drawings No long waits for building licences Suitable for landslips, retaining wall solutions & ornate landscaping All Gabion baskets are guaranteed for over 50 years against corrosion Gabions act as natural drainage so no water diversions are necessary No sand or cement needed

For a FREE no obligation quote & site survey call:

952 516 218 / 660 792 282 O r v i s it our n ew we b si te

www.gabionspain.com / gabionspain@gmail.com


Cómpeta Properties S.L. Always at your service

Avda. Sayalonga 24B, Cómpeta (Málaga) Tel: (0034) 952 516 107 Avda. Constitución 37B, Cómpeta (Málaga) Tel: (0034) 952 55 35 89 www.competaproperties.com info@competaproperties.com Árchez

96,000€

Ref: V406 A very attractive villa just a few minutes from Árchez. 2 beds, 1 bath, 75 m2 build, 250 m2 plot. Beautiful views over the countryside and the lovely white village of Canillas de Albaida. Ideal first step on the Spanish property ladder! Cómpeta

Cómpeta

El Acebuchal

109,000€

Ref: TH329 Traditional village house in good location close to all local amenities with fabulous views from the roof terrace. 2 beds, 1 bath, 60m2 build. Possibility to construct a room on the current roof terrace giving one a wonderful living area, with windows on both sides, to take full advantage of the magnificent views.

Just reduced to 169,000€ Cómpeta

Ref: TH148 A lovely modern townhouse on 3 floors. 4 beds, 1 bath. Private garage, could be converted in to additional living accommodation. Wonderful views to the coast. 110m2 living space.

106,000€

Ref: TH328 A lovely traditional townhouse in the beautiful village of El Acebuchal with a stunning backdrop. Fully reformed maintaining the traditional features of the area and offering modern day comfort. 2 beds, 1 bath, 50m2 build, split level terrace. ALSO AVAILABLE FOR RENTAL Just reduced to 177,000€ Cómpeta 249,000€

Ref: TH044 Roomy townhouse in good condition and well situated, close to all local amenities. 2/3 beds, 1 bath + WC, 160m2 build. This property is in need of a little updating and gives many possibilities to do so.

Ref: V382 An extremely attractive villa situated on the outskirts of the village with excellent access via tarmac and concrete roads. 3 beds, 2 baths, 105m2 build, 800m2 plot. The exterior living room could be very easily converted into a separate guest apartment.

In conjunction with Cómpeta Properties S.L. Construction & Services “Care and quality combined” Avda. Sayalonga 24A, Cómpeta (Málaga) Tel/Fax: (0034) 952 55 34 35 celefernandez@competaproperties.com


46

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Divorce Letters Probably not the best thing to write about during the month of lurve! But this is a true exchange of letters written between a husband and wife Dear Husband: I'm writing you this letter to tell you that I'm leaving you for good. I've been a good woman to you for seven years and I have nothing to show for it. These last two weeks have been hell. Your boss called to tell me that you had quit your job today and that was the last straw. Last week, you came home and didn't notice that I had gotten my hair and nails done, cooked your favourite meal and even wore a brand new negligee. You came home and ate in two minutes, and went straight to sleep after watching the game. You don't tell me you love me anymore, you don't touch me or anything. Either you're cheating or you don't love me anymore. Whatever the case, I'm gone. P.S. If you're trying to find me, don't. Your BROTHER and I are moving away to West Virginia together! Have a great life! Your Ex-wife Dear Ex-wife: Nothing has made my day more than receiving your letter. It's true that you and I have been married for seven years, although a good woman is a far cry from what you've been. I watch sports so much to try to drown out your constant nagging. Too bad that doesn't work. I did notice when you cut off all of your hair last week, the first thing that came to mind was "You look just like a man!" My mother raised

Advertise in this space from just 25 euros per month Call: 664 210 468

me to not say anything if you can't say anything nice. When you cooked my favourite meal, you must have gotten me confused with MY BROTHER, because I stopped eating pork seven years ago. I went to sleep on you when you had on that new negligee because the price tag was still on it. I prayed that it was a coincidence that my brother had just borrowed fifty dollars from me that morning and your negligee was $49.99. After all of this, I still loved you and felt that we could work it out. So when I discovered that I had hit the lotto for ten million dollars, I quit my job and bought us two tickets to Jamaica. But when I got home you were gone. Everything happens for a reason I guess. I hope you have the filling life you always wanted. My lawyer said with your letter that you wrote, you won't get a dime from me. So take care. P.S. I don't know if I ever told you this but Carl, my brother, was born Carla. I hope that's not a problem. Signed, Rich As Hell and Free!

Weston Kennels & Cattery Fully Licensed Kennels

A real home from home for your pets Over 18 years experience Collection Service Long stays our speciality We also have CAS dogs & cats looking for a home tel: 951 254 134 952 030 036

Email: terrygweston@yahoo.com we are on the torrox - Competa road, 100m from Pavo real


rEF. 5100

CÓMPEta FiNCa 100M 2 rEF. 4931

GOOD VALUE: RENOVATED FINCA, 2 BEDS, 2 BATHS, POOL, CENTRAL HEATING, GOOD ACCESS, SOLD FURNISHED, 14,000 M2 LAND PriCE 235,000€ rEF. 4377

GOOD SIzED VILLA: 3 BEDS, 2 BATHS, POOL, 2 SITTING ROOMS, BIG STOREROOM, SOLD UNFURNISHED, 2200 M2 LAND PriCE 295,000€

tOrrOx tOwNhOUsE 80M 2 rEF. 4958

READY TO MOVE INTO: 2 BEDS, 1 BATH, MODERN KITCHEN, ROOF TERRACE, NICE VIEWS, PARKING NEARBY, SOLD SEMI FURNISHED PriCE 90,000€

CÓMPEta ViLLa 167M 2 rEF. 5007

CÓMPEta FiNCa 155M 2

FULL OF CHARACTER: 2 BEDS, GUEST APARTMENT, 3 BATHS, POOL, NICE TERRACES, 3 STOREROOMS, 2785 M2 LAND, 500 M TRACK PriCE 299,000€

tOrrOx saYaLONga ViLLa 143M 2 rEF. 4853 ViLLa 165M 2

PRIVATE VILLA: 2 BEDS, GUEST APARTMENT, 2 BATHS, GOOD SIzED POOL, GARAGE, SEA VIEW, 4,900 M2 LAND, CAR INCLUDED PriCE 250,000€

FANTASTIC LOCATION: 5 BEDS, 2 BATHS, PRIVATE POOL, GARAGE, VERY GOOD ACCESS, PANORAMIC VIEWS, 4,800 M2 LAND PriCE 425,000€



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49

The Word Queen

Beware!

Where do ideas come from? Some might say the sky, others the ether, and a fraction from our angels or spiritual guides. I like to think that ideas are in the air. They float around in their invisible form, waiting to land in a mind which is open to receive.

We have been informed that there are bogus gas technicians in the area again. The Police and CEPSA have confirmed that these people are not legitimate Cepsa reps.

In a more general sense ideas stem from our inspiration. According to the dictionary inspiration is ‘a divine influence directly and immediately exerted upon the mind or soul.’ One technique to planting an idea seed is via brainstorming, which involves letting your mind run away, as if you were completing a marathon. It’s all about perseverance! The best method of brainstorming is to write down everything that enters your head, no matter how ridiculous. The key is to not stop for a breath. Just keep on running. If you stop and wonder if that idea will really work then the flow of ideas will stop as easily as they started. Try brainstorming first thing in the morning when your mind is emptier and fresher. some Brainstorming Dos & Don’ts… DO use a new notebook and pen, or a tape recorder. DON’t try to brainstorm when you are tired, hungry, stressed or ill. DO make yourself comfortable before brainstorming. Find a quiet room, free of distractions. DON’t worry if it seems you’re writing down wild and crazy things. Remember not to stop and critique anything during a brainstorming session. DO take regular breaks of ten to fifteen minutes. Other techniques to planting ideas are through dreams and asking questions, which we’ll explore in later editions. Love & Light, The Word Queen x

They are using a Hyundai vehicle - registration 3572 DMz. Be on your guard!


From 120€

From 150€


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51

Hmmmm... Yum Yum! White Chocolate Raspberry Cheescake ingredients 1 cup chocolate cookie crumbs 3 tablespoons white sugar 1/4 cup butter, melted 1 (10 ounce) package frozen raspberries 2 tablespoons white sugar 2 teaspoons cornstarch 1/2 cup water 2 cups white chocolate chips 1/2 cup half-and-half cream 3 (8 ounce) packages cream cheese, softened 1/2 cup white sugar 3 eggs 1 teaspoon vanilla extract Directions In a medium bowl, mix together cookie crumbs, 3 tablespoons sugar, and melted butter. Press mixture into the bottom of a 9 inch springform pan. In a saucepan, combine raspberries, 2 tablespoons sugar, cornstarch, and water. Bring to boil, and continue boiling for 5 minutes, or until

sauce is thick. Strain sauce through a mesh strainer to remove seeds. Preheat oven to 325 degrees F (165 degrees C). In a metal bowl over a pan of simmering water, melt white chocolate chips with half-andhalf, stirring occasionally until smooth. In a large bowl, mix together cream cheese and 1/2 cup sugar until smooth. Beat in eggs one at a time. Blend in vanilla and melted white chocolate. Pour half of batter over crust. Spoon 3 tablespoons of raspberry sauce over the batter. Pour remaining cheesecake batter into pan, and again spoon 3 tablespoons raspberry sauce over the top. Swirl batter with the tip of a knife to create a marbled effect. Bake for 55 to 60 minutes, or until filling is set. Cool, cover with plastic wrap, and refrigerate for 8 hours before removing from pan. Serve with remaining raspberry sauce.


52

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Healty Eating Healthy eating is not expensive............it's priceless. On 12th and 19th February, Jean Sampson from RightLifestyle.com will visit Arkwrights in Puente don Manuel and bring you some great ideas and tips for healthy cooking. Jean promotes Healthy Living at her home where she holds workshops. Her clients are set to come along and help prepare the food, and then everyone will taste everything! This is an ideal way to introduce a healthy lifestyle. It would be wonderful if some of our customers came to taste the samples. Jean has the most divine recipe for a healthy chocolate cake! She will also have all her cookbooks on sale, answer any queries you may have and offer advice. Once you have tried the foods you will be able to buy the ingredients and make the recipes for yourself at home. We have sourced a supplier in the UK, and just as we did initially with the shop, we will take this a stage at a time, get a few products and then listen to customer feedback regarding what they want. We will stock anything you wish to buy. We have wanted to offer new products for just over a year, and now we have the incentive and help to get going. We have already introduced gluten and lactose-free products, but this is a small selection that few even know about. We are trying to get Healthy for 2011. For those who are interested in a healthier lifestyle, Jean Sampson's visit is a great opportunity to sample some delicious, nutritious meals!

DJ TREV

Disco & Light show Available for Bar Villa Party & Private Functions

Call: 6000 47435 €UrO COiN

ELECtriC MEtErs

Ideal for landlords & holiday properties. Perfect to control expensive & excessive use of a/c units, etc. Contact Phil Watts PW Electrical Services SC tel: 647 006 140 / 678 442 402 Email: philwatts952@hotmail.com

CAR BOOT SALE  OLD & NEW  1st Sunday of every month Restaurant El Pantano 9.30am - 1.30pm

(On the A356 towards Colmenar, overlooking the lake) Call Lynn 669 600 419 Sandra 619 471 301

Take a Break

Take time to relax, meet with your friends or a weekend away, reassured that your loved one is in safe hands. NVQ qualified Level 3, CRB registered, NHS approved. 8 years experience with mental health, learning disabilities, challenging behaviour, alzheimas & dementure

Willing to travel Contact Steve Taplin: 622 239 317


POOL TABLE

BAR ATiLA

INTERNET ACCESS FREE WI-FI

Kitchen open Mon, Tues, Wed & Fri 10am - 8pm Sat 12pm - 7pm Sun 1pm - 5pm Open everyday at 12pm Closed Thursdays throughout February SUNDAY ROAST DINNERS!! 3 courses 9.95€ - Lamb, Beef or Pork with 4 veg & all the trimmings Tuesday nights - 8.30pm - Quiz Wednesdays / Sundays - 2pm - Pool Club Happy Hour - Mon - Fri 6pm - 7pm (Mahou 1.25€ pint, non-branded spirit & mixer 1.75€) Draught Worthingtons - 3€ Draught Carling - 2.50€ Draught Strongbow - 3€

All Live football shown Premiership games & lower leagues 4pm game every Saturday

SKY SPORTS

All in FULL HD!!

ESPN

For information or bookings call: 685 552 529 C/Buena Vista, Puente don Manuel www.atilas.freezoka.com


54

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The English Language We take English for granted. But if we explore it’s paradoxes, we find that quicksand can work slowly, boxing rings are square and a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig. And why is it that writers write but fingers don't fing, grocers don't groce and hammers don't ham? If the plural of tooth is teeth, why isn't the plural of booth beeth? One goose, 2 geese. So one moose, 2 meese? One index, 2 indices? Doesn't it seem crazy that you can make amends but not one amend, that you comb through annals of history but not a single annal? If you have a bunch of odds and ends and get rid of all but one of them, what do you call it? If teachers taught, why didn't preacher

praught? If a vegetarian eats vegetables, what does a humanitarian eat? If you wrote a letter, perhaps you bote your tongue? Sometimes I think all the English speakers should be committed to an asylum for the verbally insane. In what language do people recite at a play and play at a recital? Ship by truck and send cargo by ship? Have noses that run and feet that smell? How can a slim chance and a fat chance be the same, while a wise man and wise guy are opposites? How can overlook and oversee be opposites, while quite a lot and quite a few are alike? How can the weather be hot as hell one day and cold as hell another?

Do You. Care ? Care working in the UK - Country Cousins is the UK’s leading private care specialist introduction agency, providing live-in care mainly for the elderly and infirm, enabling people to remain in their own homes for longer

Many Country Cousins live here in Spain returning to the UK frequently or every now and then for two weeks or more assignments. If you are interested in earning between £945 - £1,200 for 15 days (one client) or £1,020 - £1,560 (two clients) by becoming a Country Cousin, please call Jennie or Barry for more information on: 625 807 504 or 952 115 305 (evenings)

Precious Hand Crafted Jeweller y ...as individual as you are

Available at Divas, Puente don Manuel, Alcaucin (next to Moreno’s Bar)

Pop in for some Valentine’s ideas www.preciousjewellerybykaren.co.uk

Painting & Decorating Need your home decorated ? Inside and out Good Rates

Call: 6000 47435


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55

The English Language (Continued)

Inner Peace

Have you noticed that we talk about certain things only when they are absent? Have you ever seen a horseful carriage or a strapful gown? Met a sung hero or experienced requited love? Have you ever run into someone who was combobulated, gruntled, ruly or peccable? And where are all those people who ARE spring chickens or who would ACTUALLY hurt a fly?

I am including this in the magazine because it definitely works, and we could all use a little more calmness in our lives.

You have to marvel at the unique lunacy of a language in which your house can burn up as it burns down, in which you fill in a form by filling it out and in which an alarm clock goes off by going on.

So, I looked around my house to see all the things I started and hadn't finished, and before leaving the house this morning, I finished off a bottle of Bailey's Irish Cream, a packet of Oreos, the remainder of my old Prozac prescription, the rest of the cheesecake, some Doritos, a box of chocolates and a half bottle of Scotch.

English was invented by people, not computers, and it reflects the creativity of the human race (which, of course, isn't a race at all). That is why, when the stars are out, they are visible, but when the lights are out, they are invisible. And why, when I wind up my watch, I start it, but when I wind up this article, I end it.

By following simple advice heard on the Dr. Phil show, you too can find inner peace. Dr Phil proclaimed, "The way to achieve inner peace is to finish all the things you have started and have never finished."

You have no idea how good I feel right now!



To advertise call 664 210 468 or email sales@thesentinella.com

57

Breast & Body Screening The Breast of Health by Kami, Sentinella To be honest I’m a bit of a worrier, but my worst fear has always been the prospect of getting cancer. So when Janet Van Dam, a qualified Thermographer started advertising in The Sentinella my initial thought was that I must go and visit her. However, nerves got the better of me. Sadly, Janet has seen both her mother and sister fall prey to breast cancer, so she decided to qualify as a Medical Thermographer, using state-of-the-art equipment called Digital Infrared Thermal Imaging (DITI). Janet hopes to help stop other women from contracting the disease by detecting potential tumours before they’ve had the chance to grow. She stresses that this is the only reliable tool to detect breast cancer early. Unfortunately, a mammogram only sees the tumour once it’s the size of a large pea. After reading more, I was determined to get myself tested. I made an appointment and I felt both nervous and worried about the big daunting machine and whether Janet would have to touch and prod me. However, the day arrived and after sitting in Janet’s clinic for a few minutes all my worries disintegrated, and there was no sign of any daunting machine! I felt so comfortable and reassured by her that the process was simple, pain-free, quick and noninvasive, and I quickly realised that Janet was a people person; the perfect lady for the job! Prior to my appointment Janet sent me an information sheet explaining the procedure. For example, what I’d have to remove prior to the test and advising me not to eat, smoke or drink prior to the test. She checked I’d read this, then we completed a simple form about my medical history for her records. Once the forms were complete, Janet asked me to remove my clothing from the waist up and she handed me a gown to wear, ready for the scanning to be performed. I sat on a stool opposite the camera and she took approximately six photos. Before I knew it, it was all over and I had nothing to worry about at all! The process was much simpler than I’d imagined. Janet explained that my forms and photos would now be sent away for interpretation by a team of qualified doctors and thermologists who would analyse the findings. She said my results would be received within forty-eight hours; much quicker than I’d expected. All I had to do now was to wait!

Even though at the time of writing this I’ve not yet received my results, I’m very pleased that I’ve had the screening done. Now whether the results are clear or not, at least I can rest assured that everything is ok. If not, I can take the relevant steps to prevent problems getting out of control in the future. At a very reasonable price for your health and wellbeing, an initial scan costs €120 and a follow-up is recommended in ninety days. If you book both scans, Janet offers the second for €85, a reduction of €35. Screenings are advisable yearly. Not only does Janet specialise in Thermography, she’s also a qualified Nutritional Coach and she can help improve weight control. She offers full body scans for other problems too, such as back pain, arthritis, skin abnormalities, unexplained pain and many more common ailments. Well, now I’m eagerly anticipating my results, so fingers crossed that all is ok. I’ll be visiting Janet again in ninety days for my follow up scan, so I’ll write about my experiences again shortly.

Breast & Body Screening Medical Thermography Janet van Dam

618 989 125 w Non Invasive w Pain Free w Radiation Free w Reliable Centro Mar y salud, El Morche 952 532 065 617 913 196 tuesdays & thursdays 11.00 - 17.00

PREVENTION & EARLY DETECTION www.medical-thermography.org


58

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g n i z a Am mals Ani

e siz to r e ! d un bat wn wom o d d ky atches. hea wac e w and th on wild m e is th up th

The wombat lives in hilly forest country and it likes to burrow underground. A wombat burrow can be as long as 20 metres. Wombats quickly dig complicated tunnels with their strong legs and sharp claws, and then they push loosened soil away with their hind feet. Wombats like to live alone. Wombats usually rest in or near their burrows during the day and come out at night to eat. Farmers consider wombats pests because they damage crops and fences, and cattle may break their legs by stepping in wombat bur-

rows. The burrows also provide shelter for rabbits which also damage crops. For these reasons, farmers are often eager to rid their farms of all wombats. The hairy-nosed wombat lives in dry, grassy regions of Australia. This kind of wombat uses its burrow to control its temperature. By staying in its burrow during the day, the wombat keeps cool and conserves water in the summer, and stays warm in the winter. The wombat, like many famous Australian animals is a marsupial. The female has a pouch but, unlike a kangaroo, this pouch opens rearward. This helps prevent dirt from entering the pouch as the wombat digs. Wombats look clumsy with their lumbering walk but can reach speeds up to 25 miles an

OTop Quality G Kitchens Kitchens at sensible prices RANGE

ROVE

The savings we make by not having a high street shop or sales staff are passed on to you. I´m confident we can beat any high street quote. Now incorporating MtEk Plumbing & Electrical services

Let us quote for your kitchen. What have you got to lose?? Tel: 610 683 951 661 713 238 email:lastgamesoon@hotmail.com

References & visits to past customers available. Kitchens to suit all budgets


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Amazing Animals (Continued) hour (40km) for short distances. There are three types of wombat; the Common wombat, the Northern Hairynosed wombat and the Southern Hairy-nosed wombat Their strong teeth never stop growing and don't have roots. Even an old wombat has teeth that are strong enough to grind food. In times of drought wombats can go without food and water for a long time. They stay in the cool moist air of their burrows during the heat of the day, conserving energy.

59

Axarquia Art Big Hit For New Art Group. The first exhibition staged by Axarquia Art proved to be a big success.The beautiful building of the Riogordo museum formed the perfect backdrop to display the works of art. The contributing artists showed a variety of media and materials with paintings, drawings, sculpture and ceramics on display. The event proved to be very popular with between 150 and 200 people attending the opening. There were many highly favourable comments on the variety and quality of work on display, a fact confirmed by the viewing public with sales exceeding €1,000 on the first night. The groups’ next major exhibition will take place at Easter. More details on their website www.axarquiaart.blogspot.com For more information about the group and information on becoming a member email axarquiaart@gmail.com

handcrafts & arabic sweets

Escape & Go with ArteSano to Morocco for St. Valentine's Day!! Spend just 20€ and receive a raffle ticket for your chance to win a weekend in Morocco

Call in for more information:

Princesa 3, torre del Mar tel: 952 54 16 97 www.arte-sano.eu


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The World Of Advertising Ads Gone Wrong *For sale: a quilted high chair that can be made into a table, pottie, chair, rocking horse, refrigerator, spring coat, size 8 and fur collar. *Four-poster bed, 101 years old. Perfect for antique lover. *Now is the perfect time to get your ears pierced and get an extra pair to take home, too! *Wanted: 50 girls for stripping machine operators in factory *Wanted: Unmarried girls to pick fresh fruit and produce at night. *We do not tear your clothing with machinery. We do it carefully by hand. *No matter what your topcoat is made of, this miracle spray will make it really repellent *For Sale - Eight puppies from a German Shepherd and an Alaskan Huskey.

*Have several very old dresses from grandmother in beautiful condition. *Tired of cleaning yourself? Let me do it. *The hotel has bowling alleys, tennis courts, comfortable beds and other athletic facilities. *Save regularly in our bank. You'll never reget it. *Offer expires December 31 or while supplies last. *Man, honest. Will take anything. *Man wanted to work in dynamite factory. Must be willing to travel. *Christmas tag-sale. Handmade gifts for the hard-to-find person. *Wanted: Hair-cutter. Excellent growth potential. *Wanted. Man to take care of cow that does not smoke or drink.

Clinica Casa Blanca Clinic for:

OSTEOPATHY

THE BOWEN TECHNIQUE

Massage, Lymphatic drainage, Shiatsu, Reiki, Reflexology, Ear-Acupunture, Craniosacral Therapy Do you suffer from back problems, spinal misalignment, pain in neck or shoulders, joint discomfort, tightness in muscles, internal ailments, migraines, fibromyalgy or do you just want relaxation from stress? The Bowen Technique is gentle and works on the whole body for inflammation, illness and pain. The treatment is safe and appropriate for everyone, from newborn babies to the frail and elderly.

Forever living products: inc. Minerals and Aloe Vera Products etc. Also home visits Ask about gift vouchers Urb. Jardines del Mar, Blq C3, Torrox Costa (near garden Centre, 1km direction Nerja)

email: clinicacasablanca@gmail.com

www.clinica-casa-blanca.com

Tel: 952 967 628 or 659 374 673


THE HAiR & BEAUTY STUDio Cruce de Periana, Puente don Manuel (along from Morenos)

Beauty Treatments

Pedicures w Manicures w Collagen Facials w Hopi Ear Candles w Acrylic & Gel Nail Extensions w Teeth Whitening w Eyelash Perming w Aromatherapy Massage w Semi Permanent Makeup w Reiki w Waxing w Self Tan Treatment w Reflexology and Lots More!!

Qualified Sports & Remedial Therapist. (BSC Hons; RSA)

Specialising in soft tissue massage and manipulation inc. treatments for sciatica, back problems, tension headaches, muscle injuries as well as relaxing & lymphatic massage.

Treat that very special person in your life to Gift Vouchers - Total Pampering!

Unisex Hairdressers

our hairdressing team now consists of Emma, Karen, Danni & Carly. We are now open 6 days a week Monday - Saturday and also late nights by appointment only. Please call in or contact the Salon for a FREE consultation with one of our highly qualified Stylists.

Advanced Cosmetic Procedures & Electrolysis For the treatment of Moles, Thread veins, Milia, Skin tags, Blood spots, Warts, Veruccas and Age spots FREE CoNSULTATioN FEBRUARY OFFERS Hot Stone Massage-Normal Price 35€ Now 30€ (1 hour treatment) Nail Extensions-Normal Price 40€ Now 35€ Full Set Nail Extensions-Normal Price 40€ Now 35€

For all enquiries please call: 693 740 575


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Court Order! Actual dialogues which occurred in the court room!

a: By death. Q: And, by whose death was it terminated?

Q: What is your brother-in-law's name? a: Borofkin Q: What is his first name? a: I can't remember. Q: He's been your brother-in-law for 45 years, and you can't remember his first name? a: No. I tell you I'm too excited. (Rising from the witness chair and pointing to Mr. Borofkin). Nathan, for God's sake, tell them your first name!

Q: What is your name? a: Ernestine McDowell. Q: What is your marital status? a: Fair.

Q: Did you stay all night with this man in New York? a: I refuse to answer that question. Q: Did you stay all night with this man in Chicago? a: I refuse to answer that question. Q: Did you ever stay all night with this man in Miami? a: No.

Q: How did you happen to go to Dr. Cheney? a: Well, a gal down by the road had had several of her children by Dr. Cheney and said he was really good.

Q: Doctor, did you say he was shot in the woods? a: No, I said he was shot in the lumber region. Q: Now, Mrs. Johnson, how was your first marriage terminated?

Q: Are you married? a: No, I'm divorced. Q: What did your husband do before you divorced him? a: A lot of things that I didn't know about.

Q: You say you're innocent, yet five people swore they saw you steal a watch. a: Your Honour, I can produce 500 people who didn't see me steal it. Q: Please state the location of your right foot immediately prior to impact. a: Immediately before the impact, my right foot was located at the immediate end of my right leg.

For es ty l s e s s l al + len m Fra

Yo u C h o o s e!

e



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Soroptimist Soroptimist International is planning new clubs in the Axarquia Region Soroptimist International (the world’s largest organisation for professional women) is planning to start a new club, East of Malaga. There is already a club in Mijas, which was founded in 2006 and is very active with local, spanish and international projects. They range from local undertakings including distribution of food parcels at Christmas for poor families in Mijas, hand-outs of teddy bears to a children’s hospital in Malaga - to fundraising to help women exposed to domestic violence in the Malaga Province and the financing of wells in Sierra Leone. The money for these projects is raised by the members of the club at markets, charity dinners, walkathons, mini-golf tournaments, raffles, etc… As a starting point, an informal information meeting was called on the 27th of November

in “El Despacho de Fernan,” in the town hall building in Competa. Unfortunately it was ‘THE’ Saturday of torrential rain, but it turned out to be a very good meeting with lots of talk around the coffee table. Soroptimists from the Mijas club brought a laptop so they were able to present information about this International Organisation, as well as the other four clubs in Spain, and of course the Mijas Club website www.sies.org. They also spoke about the fantastic network that Soroptimist International has, linking 90,000 members in more than 100 countries on four continents. The meeting worked out very well and the attendees agreed to keep in touch and try and form a new local group in Competa. More information meetings are planned in other localities in the Axarquia region and therefore women who might be interested in coming along and eventually having a future club, are kindly asked to contact Bente Christensen Soroptimist.Axarquia@gmail.com

kIELER JURGEN

RE ST SE U AU o A h R k I B A R AR ANT E E T T S FE CA Specialities in Lamb, Spare Ribs & Steaks

New Winter menu with “German Specials” Pork Knuckle with Sauer Kraut - 10€ Crispy Duck with all the trimmings - only 12.50€ Wild Boar Goulasch - only 11€ Home made food available for Take Away (vacuum packed on the premises)

Private functions catered for with Special Menus Open 9am - 11pm (closed Tuesdays) Nr. Centro International 72, Bajo, Algarrobo Costa (opp. large swimming pool)

Tel: 952 511 881 or 648 943 872



ARKWRIGHTS

The British Store & More Your No. 1 Stop Shop Open 7 days a week. MAKE SURE YoU MAKE THE RiGHT MoVE & TURN RiGHT AT VENTA BAJA CRoSSRoADS To ARKWRiGHT’S

WE ARE THE LAST SHoP oN THiS PARADE

FEBRUARY OFFER

20% OFF

ALL GRAVY GRANULES DON’T FORGET YOUR LOVED ONE ON VALENTINE’S DAY, SINGLE ROSES TO BOUQUETS AVAILABLE

NOW ALSO WATCH OUT FOR OUR WEEKLY OFFERS. 750G BLUE DRAGON SWEET CHILLI DIPPING SAUCE IS NOW 2.50€

the Parcel Force to be reckoned with

Sending or Collecting items from UK or Europe

winter opening hours: Monday - saturday 9am - 7pm sunday 10am - 4 pm


ARKWRIGHTS

Where you are Number ONE. Not one of a number. Puente don Manuel EXCITING NEW ARRIVAL OF A HEALTHY LIVING AISLE GOOD HEALTH IS NOT EXPENSIVE …. IT’S PRICELESS!! TO CORRESPOND WITH JEAN SAMPSON’S VISIT IN FEBRUARY, WE ARE INTRODUCING HEALTHY FOOD TO ARKWRIGHTS. THIS IS SOMETHING WE HAVE BEEN MEANING TO DO FOR SOME TIME AND DUE TO POPULAR DEMAND, IN FEBRUARY WE ARE OPENING A HEALTHY SECTION TO INCLUDE GLUTEN & LACTOSE FREE PRODUCTS. SHOULD YOU WISH FOR A FAVOURITE ITEM TO BE ADDED, JUST LET LINDA KNOW. JEAN FROM RIGHTLIFESTYLE.COM WILL BE VISITING THE SHOP ON 12TH & 19TH FEBRUARY BETWEEN 11AM AND 2PM TO BRING YOU SOME GREAT IDEAS AND TIPS ON HEALTHY COOKING. JEAN PROMOTES HEALTHY LIVING AT HER HOME WHERE SHE HOLDS WORKSHOPS. I RECENTLY ATTENDED A WORKSHOP AT MITzI’S HOME IN VINUELA, THE FOOD IS DELICIOUS AND SO HEALTHY AND I WAS SO IMPRESSED THAT JEAN WAS PREPARED TO TAKE UP SOME OF HER VALUABLE TIME TO INTRODUCE HER WAY TO OUR CUSTOMERS. IT WOULD BE WONDERFUL IF SOME OF OUR CUSTOMERS COULD COME ALONG AND TASTE THE SAMPLES ON OFFER AND JEAN WILL ALSO HAVE ALL HER COOKERY BOOKS ON SALE AND BE AVAILABLE FOR ADVICE AND TIPS. OUR USUAL PRODUCTS WILL IN NO WAY SUFFER FROM THE INTRODUCTION OF THE HEALTHY LIFESTYLE. WE SHALL CONTINUE TO LOOK AFTER EVERYONE. AS USUAL JUST LET US KNOW IF YOU WISH TO ADD SOMETHING TO OUR RANGE. WE ARE 99% SUCCESSFUL IN OBTAINING THE UNOBTAINABLE IN SPAIN. JUST GIVE US A TRY. WE ONLY CLOSE TWO DAYS OF THE YEAR, CHRISTMAS DAY & NEW YEAR’S DAY, WE DO NOT CLOSE FOR SPANISH OR BRITISH HOLIDAYS

952 519 780

we accept all major credit cards Find us on the web: www.arkwrights-groceries.com


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Random Jokes During the 4th hole the following conversations took place: First guy: You have no idea what I had to do, to play today... I promised my wife to paint every room in the house next weekend. second guy: That's nothing; I promised my wife I’d build her a new deck for the pool. third guy: Man, you both have it easy! I promised to remodel the kitchen. They continue to play the hole when they realise the fourth guy has not said a word. So they ask him: 'You haven't said anything about what you had to do, in order to come golfing this weekend. What's the deal?' Fourth guy: I set my alarm for 5am. When it went off, I gave the wife a slap on her arse and said: 'Golf course or intercourse?’ She said: “Wear sun-block."

I urgently needed a few days off work, but I knew the Boss would not allow me to take any leave. I thought that maybe if I acted 'Crazy' then he would tell me to take a few days off. So I hung upside-down on the ceiling and made funny noises. My co-worker (who's blonde) asked me what I was doing. I told her that I was pretending to be a light bulb so that the Boss would think I was 'Crazy' and give me a few days off. A few minutes later the Boss came into the office and asked, 'What in the name of GOD are you doing?' I told him I was a light bulb. He said, 'You are clearly stressed out.' Go home and recuperate for a couple of days.' I jumped down and walked out of the office... When my co-worker (the blonde) followed me, the Boss asked her, '..And where do you think you're going?!' She said, 'I'm going home too. I can't work in the dark’.

SAXON S.L B O a r D i N g C at t E rY

JcB digger Hire velez-Malaga Area

Canillas de aceituno

We offer safe, tranquil accomodation for your cat. Our pens are safe and secure but with all the comforts of home, making it very cosy. Only 20 mins from Torre del Mar, inland towards Vinuela, Campo Cats is a short 2 min drive from a main tarmac road which gives very good access. We welcome inspection visits where we can discuss your cat’s personal needs. (A 10% discount will be offered on your first booking) We only accept cats that are fully vaccinated. Also, we can provide a collection & delivery service. For further details, call Linda on: 665 510 735 www.campocats.com

sErvicEs

*LAndscAPE GArdEninG *cArPEntry * stOrM dAMAGE *LAndsLidEs And trAcK cLEArinG *PLUs ALL MAnnEr OF diGGinG UndErtAKEn

662 39 83 72 / 678 23 22 53 Email: saxonsl@live.co.uk


‘Marich’ 3 idiomas Services Language School

Spanish Lessons

English & German Lessons

interpretation Services

opening in February 2011 Located in Puente Don Manuel at the Periana Crossing between Panaderia Juanito and above the Vets for Spanish, English or German lessons

Please contact and ask for more info: Maria Azucena CHACiN Tel.: 645 197 910 Email: azucenach@inbox.com


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To advertise call 664 210 468

Psychic Medium Energy Healer

From an early age I’ve always had the ability to tune into people’s moods, which I now understand was the main reason for my unhappiness. I wanted to help, but I couldn’t. So you must be wondering what my gifts are and how I can help you…Well, I tune into you and look deep inside and around your aura. Fragments of your life appear and working in alpha mode I gain information about your happiness and sadness. Then I tune into clearing your sadness and, coupled with energy healing, I clear bad energy and release emotional blocks which can feed illness if they’re not removed. Remember, if you start to feel ill it’s your body telling you that something is out of balance. I use many tools in my work including tarot, oils, crystals, etc, as via them I’m able to gain accurate information about the future. Finally it’s as if I hold a mirror up to you and you truly see yourself as you were meant to. From that day on you receive a gift called self realisation. To see people change in front of my eyes and walk away with their shoulders held high is the most satisfying gift and it humbles me everyday. It’s true that I’d be the first to throw the towel in if this work was damaging in anyway. I’ve been trained well and I have a deep respect about what should and shouldn’t be said. Well, now you know a little bit about me, next month I’d like to share some of my amazing psychic experiences with you. Until then I’ll leave you with this thought: ‘If you’re at a crossroads or unhappy and you can’t put your finger on why, then take comfort because…. YOU’RE JUST ONE STEP AWAY FROM HAPPINESS. See main advert opposite

Pinguinitos Swim School Nerja *Classes for all ages of children starting from 3 months *UK qualified teacher *Technique clinic for older children *Small friendly classes *Private adult lessons available Call: 662 463 452 www.swimbabynerja.com


Pino Electricidad special Offer:

4,95€

special Offer

129€ haLOgEN LaMP 12V/50W

special Offer:

59,95€

special Offer:

74,95€ gas hEatEr Max. 3600W Very portable

special Offer:

29,95€

DEhUMiDiFiEr 10 Litres per day Consumption 300w

DEhUMiDiFiEr Releases 600ml per day

special Offer:

49,95€

MiCrOwaVE 700W 440x335x258mm 5 power levels special Offer:

29,95€

special Offer:

19,95€

hEatED  tOwEL raiL Easy to mount Dries & warms

taBLE tOP hOB 2 levels of heat 1500w & 750w White

ExtENsiON rEEL 4 sockets 25 metres

Custudio Puga, 9-a tOrrE DEL Mar tel: 95 254 03 92 Fax: 95 254 32 93


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Sport Hurts!!!

Ink Cartridges Compatible or Original

Epson compatible ink cartridges 6.00â‚Ź each Visit us at the Farmers markets Trapiche = Tuesday Puente Don Manuel = Friday For orders and delivery please contact:

636 298 538 sales@printerink.es


To advertise call 664 210 468 or email sales@thesentinella.com

73

First Aid Valuable Piece of information Let's say it's 6.15pm and you're going home (alone of course), after an unusually hard day on the job. You're really tired, upset and frustrated. Suddenly you start experiencing severe pain in your chest that starts to drag out into your arm and up into your jaw. You are only about five miles from the hospital nearest your home. Unfortunately you don't know if you'll be able to make it that far. You have been trained in CPR, but the guy that taught the course did not tell you how to perform it on yourself.

feel faint, has only about 10 seconds left before losing consciousness. However, these victims can help themselves by coughing repeatedly and very vigorously. A deep breath should be taken before each cough, and the cough must be deep and prolonged, as when producing sputum from deep inside the chest. A breath and a cough must be repeated about every two seconds without let-up until help arrives, or until the heart is felt to be beating normally again.

HOW TO SURVIVE A HEART ATTACK WHEN ALONE

Deep breaths get oxygen into the lungs and coughing movements squeeze the heart and keep the blood circulating. The squeezing pressure on the heart also helps it regain normal rhythm. In this way, heart attack victims can get to a hospital.

Since many people are alone when they suffer a heart attack, without help, the person whose heart is beating improperly and who begins to

A cardiologist says If just 10 people remember this, you can bet that we'll save at least one life.

FOr saLE

1 bed beautifully finished apartment in Mijas Pueblo with idyllic private garden (very rare in Mijas Pueblo). Comes with brand new trendy furniture and electric appliances. Proven excellent rental potential, along with further rentals for this year, located just off Calle San Sebastian in an excellent position 5 mins away from all shops and restaurants, buses etc... €139,950 tel: 649 369 009 2 bed apartment - distressed sale, Mijas Pueblo, €84,000, sea views and a balcony.

tel: 649 369 009

Property Sales & Rentals Property Management / Maintenance Investment opportunities on property in the Caribbean VIE Cosmetics and Homeware Tel: 666 135 516 www.spanishmanagement.com

the home Cooking Co.

Don't go out - we'll come to you Fed up with restaurant food and prices?...the drive home? ...always feel rushed? why not let us prepare and serve you, your personal planned menu in the comfort of your own home. a fabulous evening or lunch to celebrate something special or just simply for the fun of it! if you are on holiday we are happy to provide our service.

tempted? Phone now or e-mail for personal attention:

952 54 56 35

Richard or Camelia camelia@thehomecookingco.com www.thehomecookingco.com


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Almachar

Almáchar, the capital of the muscatel grape area, is situated 35 kilometers from Málaga and 20 minutes from the beach. It derives its name from “Al Maysar,” which is Arabic for “The Meadows,” or “The Land of the Meadows.” The village used to be known as Almáchar de la Cruz because of the cross that stood on a nearby hill, and the symbol is incorporated in the town’s coat of arms. Almáchar, along with Cútar, El Borge and Moclinejo, together formed the “Four Villages” during Muslim occupation. These four towns were under the protection of Comares, and following the re-conquest in 1487, their dependence on Almáchar persisted. The town's natives are called Almachareños, who speak a distinctive guttural, jerky dialect— quite difficult for a foreigner to understand. The entrance to the village boasts a new fountain that surrounds an enormous bunch of silver grapes and is bordered by flowers. This is also the entrance to the car park. It’s possible on normal days to drive up the hill into the village and find a place to park before taking a stroll through the steep, winding streets. However, on special days like the first Saturday of September, el Día del Ajoblanco, it’s impossible to get anywhere near the centre of the village with a car. For this local holiday, the car park fills with coaches from all over Andalucía as people come to sample the famous cold garlic and almond soup. Día del Ajoblanco, officially des-

ignated a Festival of Tourist Interest, starts at about 12pm, and signs will point you to a number of stands handing out this delicious, free soup, complete with a bunch of grapes (a nice but important touch as the soup itself is a little sickly if you have too much). Locals believe the myth that there is a horde of jewels and gold that was left behind in 1497 by the retreating Moors. They believe that the treasure is hidden somewhere in a cave underneath one of the fountains near the river where it is guarded by a spirit. There are many interesting places to visit as you stroll through the narrow streets of Almáchar such as the Jardines de El Forte, the Barrio de las Cabras and the Plaza del Santo Cristo where you’ll find the Museo de la Pasa (the raisin museum, open every day from 9 am1 pm and 6-8 pm). This museum shows the way of life over the past 500 years and demonstrates every family member’s role in the making of raisins, from the fittest hauling the grapes to the drying beds to the older women snipping the stems from the dried fruit. Every September the hills are alive with the sound of this snipping! Villagers are friendly, helpful and love to chat and help you explore their town. They’ll point out places of interest and show you property for sale. Each person you speak with will have their own idea of the price, but remember that when they say “millions” they are talking in terms of pesetas not euros, a currency they have still not come to grips with!

Property Of The Month

AS2086 Almáchar 270,000 € 120m2 4 bedroom, 2 bathroom villa on two floors with swimming pool on 3000m2 of land currently covered in vines. The property is approached via a short steep track from the road just outside the village and is perfectly driveable in a normal car. There is a covered terrace, open plan living room/kitchen with fireplace, 2 bedrooms and one bathroom downstairs and 2 bedrooms (1 with roof terrace) and one bathoom upstairs. Perfect family home, walking distance to the village with its school, restaurants, bars, swimming pool etc.


wE haVE CLiENts LOOkiNg FOr PrOPErtY with sEa ViEws. iF YOU haVE PrOPErtY FOr saLE CaLL saLLY ON: 626 038 851

sally harrison Owner / agent

Email: sallyharrison@axarquiaproperties.com

AS2429 Trapiche 325,000€ 174m2 3 bedroom, 3 bathroom single storey villa with pool and sea views

AS2427 Alcaucin 185,000€ immaculate 3 bedroom, 2 bathroom ground floor apartment with lake views

AS2424 Viñuela 275,000€

AS2428 Benamaldena Pueblo 2,100,000€ 6 bedroom, 5 bathroom villa with garage, pool and sea views

AS2421 Canillas de Aceituno 275,000€ 109m2 3 bedroom, 2 bathroom villa, 5 mins from village, with 8 dog kennels

AS2368 Rio Gordo 150,000€ 246m2 3 bedroom, 2 bathroom village house with several terraces and mountain views

143m2 3 bedroom, 2 bathroom villa with lake views

www.axarquiaproperties.com


THE MOSQUITO SCREEN COMPANY

w w w

We have now been Screening the Costas and Inland for 9 years We manufacture all types of screens, any shape, any colour Magnetic - Aluminium Sliders Roller Screens - American Swing Doors and Patio/Balcony Enclosures ALUMINIUM - U.P.V.C WINDOWS, DOORS & CONSERVATORIES w w w

70mm U.P.V.C Internally Glazed 28mm Double Glazed Unit

w

Tilt and Turn System

w

Sliding Sash System

w

Fully Fitted by our own Craftsmen

Tel/Fax: 952 573 577 / 690 296 952

Email: the.mosquito.screen.company@gmail.com Or visit our website: www.mosquitoscreenco.com


To advertise call 664 210 468 or email sales@thesentinella.com

Fun ef Th

cs i P ny

act re a res G!! ictu AzIN p g AM win ollo

!! ple o e ly p ual

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es l d i r t n Wor u o C he Of T

A -z rld ta... o w ol the r V nd Uppe u d r ro ou calle so n i a y l F 7 r 2 er orme rkina b f m Bu Nu , was t s li

Population - 16.3 million Language - French Located - West Africa Capital - Ouagadougou Currency - Franc Religion - Indigenous Main Exports - Cotton Literacy Rate - 29% Life Expectancy - 48 years G.D.P. Per Capita - $564 Total Area - 274,200 sq km National Sport - Football

Famous for - The number of military coups that took place in the 1980s: there were coups in 1980, 1982, 1983 and 1987. Also the country is very prone to serious droughts. interesting Facts - Burkina Faso is a landlocked country in West Africa. It is bordered by Benin, Ghana, Côte d'Ivoire, Mali, Niger, and Togo. Formerly called the Republic of Upper Volta, it was renamed on August 4, 1984, by President Thomas Sankara to mean "the land of upright people" Wild animals found in Burkina Faso are antelopes, baboons, buffaloes, crocodiles, elephants, hippopotamuses, lions, monkeys and wild boar. It’s high population density and limited natural resources result in poor economic prospects for its citizens. Burkina Faso is home to more than 60 ethnic groups, each speaking its own language. Some of these peoples, such as the Bobo, Bissa, Gourounsi and Dogon, were living in the area as early as the 12th century.

cOLmeNAR Gym We welcome you to inspect, select & collect from our SHOWROOM at LAKE VIÑUELA In order to give clients individual attention please phone for an appointment before visiting. We are situated at KM29 (on right) off A356 1km past Camping & Pantano Restaurant. We are signposted from there. FREE PLAYMAT OR TOY FOR THE DURATION OF THE HIRE.

From bouncy chairs to buggies, stairgates to sterilisers. Everything you need for when little ones come to visit.

PHONE DAWN ON: 627 931 360 WEBSITE: www.nurseryneeds.com EMAIL: dawn@nurseryneeds.com

*pILATeS *cIRcuIT TRAINING *Keep fIT TO muSIc *peRSONAL TRAINING pILATeS cLASSeS NOW ALSO AT: pueNTe dON mANueL (uNdeRNeATH LA mAROmA ReAL eSTATe)

fOR mORe deTAILS cONTAcT: cAROL 659 295 346 emAIL: cAROLGRANT2@TIScALI.cO.uK

Painting & Decorating Need your home decorated ? Inside and out Good Rates

Call: 6000 47435


To advertise call 664 210 468 79

Body-Tec

INDIAN HEAD MASSAGE how does it work?

The aim of Indian head massage is to release the stress that has accumulated in the tissues, muscles and joints of the head, face, neck and shoulders. what does it involve? The client, fully clothed, sits in a massage chair for the treatment. The therapist uses a range of different movements including application of deep kneading and compression movements over the neck, shoulder and scalp areas. In addition, the therapist will also gently stimulate and stroke pressure points on the face. The session will usually last from twenty to forty-five minutes, and most therapists like their clients to sit quietly for ten or twenty minutes once the massage has been completed. what is it good for? Indian head massage is especially good for relieving stress, tension, fatigue, insomnia, headaches, migraine and sinusitis. Clients report that the experience is deeply calming and relaxing, leaving them feeling energised and revitalised and better able to concentrate. what are the benefits? Indian head massage helps increase joint mobility and flexibility in the neck and shoulders, improves blood circulation and lymphatic flow, frees knots of muscular tension, relaxes connective tissue, and aids in the elimination of accumulated toxins and waste products. It is particularly good for reducing the effects of stress and tension.

tel: 620 566 402

ST VALENTINES DAY GIFT VOUCHERS AVAILABLE A LOVING GIFT FOR SOMEONE SPECIAL


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Film iew Revtron Let’s face it, the TRON of 1982 was a film that got lucky. The reason was simple; it’s one of the all-time great ‘stoner’ films. With flatmates, pizza and beer, nothing looked like TRON. Which is why, 27 years down the track, someone thought a sequel would work. Jeff Bridges is Flynn, TRON's original protagonist, the software designer who got reassembled inside his computer, and forced to play his own games to survive. He's been missing for

MECHANICAL DOCTORS MECHANiCAL GARAGE

C/ de FraNsisCO de gOYa 43 POL. iND. La PaNOLEta VELEZ - MaLaga

tEL: 951 28 44 26 MOB: MiChaEL 671 758 375 mechanical_doctors@yahoo.co.uk

20 years now and son Sam (Garrett Hedlund) has re-opened the hunt. Sam stumbles upon Dad's old workshop, and before you can say "daft the first time, even dumber now", he’s also disintegrated, and put back together in "The Grid". After which, the light cycles, the killer frisbees, the vinyl body suits, the awful dialogue, in fact everything 12-year-old boys of all ages loved the first time around, is back. But bigger, shinier, louder and in 3-D. The actors aren't the problem. It’s the 20 pages more dialogue than the story really needs. Nevertheless in a few months, on DVD, with a pizza and a beer, it may be worth watching it… Star Rating - **/*****

REPAIRS TO ALL VEHICLES INCLUDING 4 X 4s & LIGHT COMMERCIALS -----QUICK SERVICE FOR OIL, BRAKES & CLUTCHES -----FULL DIAGNOSTIC CHECK - 40€ -----PRE ITV (MOT) AND PRESENT CAR FOR ITV -----COLLECTION & DELIVERY SERVICE AVAILABLE -----TYRE FITTING AND BALANCING -----RECONDITIONING OF ENGINES & GEARBOXES -----CAR & VAN HIRE -----VEHICLE TRANSPORTATION UK-SPAIN-UK


To advertise call 664 210 468 or email sales@thesentinella.com

81

TV Or Not TV?!!! Are you tired of the same old TV programmes? Are you sick of missing all the sports action? Would you like new movies to watch each and every week? Skynettv is pleased to offer the full Sky UK package (PLUS MORE) for only 25€ per month. That’s all the sports channels including Sky Sports 1-4, ESPN, Setanta Sports (yes it still exists), Eurosports and also premiership club channels Man Utd., Liverpool and Chelsea. Our offer additionally includes movies, documentaries, music as well as children’s and news channels--just to name a few.. how does it work? To use our service, we will install a new receiver (sky boxes do not work with our service) and connect it to your existing satellite dish (if you already have one).. If not, we can install the satellite dish for you. We will then connect the receiver to your internet set-up. The speed of your internet is not important because our system uses very little bandwidth. It differs from internet streaming because it connects to both the satellite dish and internet and receives its main signal from the actual satellite dish. So,,you can watch LIVE TV without worrying about it freezing. Because our receiver is connected to your satellite and home network, you are able to watch all the channels on your TV or your PC. If you are viewing channels on your TV, your computer doesn’t even need to be switched on. i don't have internet. Can i still use your service? Unfortunately, no. You need internet access to use this service. Without an internet connection, our receivers will only provide the free to air channels. If you do not currently have an internet connection but are interested in acquiring one, we are happy to recommend reliable internet providers in your area.

recordable receiver that comes with a 500GB hard drive. is there an installation charge? Yes. This fee includes a full installation, so you don't have to do a thing but sit back and enjoy! Our installation price starts at 140€. how long must i commit to? We like to keep things simple for everyone, and that's why we don't operate with contractual agreements. . Our customers are free to terminate their subscription at any time. Like many of our customers, you may not spend the whole 12 months here; if you plan to be away for more than a month, let us know, and we will put your subscription on hold. My internet is in a different room than my tV. is this a problem? Not at all. We have three different methods for connecting the receiver to your internet. We will always recommend the best option for your home. i live in the Campo. will my internet be ok? Yes. We have many clients in the Campo who use different internet providers. what else is included in the package? We are able to install additional satellites and connect them to a single receiver, which will give you extra sports channels. One of our European satellites provides Tring sports that gives you access to six Premiership matches for 3 p.m. Saturday kick-offs. Another satellite dish gives you JSC sports 1-10, which includes all the pay-per-view boxing (at no extra cost). Even with all three satellites (Sky UK, Tring and JSC), the subscription is still only 25€. Do you offer customer support after installation? We cover the entire Costa del Sol, and have technicians regularly up and down the coast. If we cannot solve the problem via telephone, we will have a technician visit you promptly. All our products come with a 12 month warranty, and there is no call-out charge.

Does it include hD channels? Yes. All HD channels are included in the 25€ per month package.

Can i view your services before i sign up? Yes. We offer FREE demonstrations in your home so you can see how well it works.

Can i record on your receivers? Yes. We have three receivers available: a standard receiver, an HD receiver and an HD

Telephone: 638 262 410 E-mail: sattvespana@gmail.com See main advert on page 65


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Please mention The Sentinella when responding to adverts

Found it!! Found it!! I found it... And you thought there was no such place, huh? You will all be so pleased to see this....... How many times have we been 'up there without one!' My work is done. This is a well known location in County Clare, Ireland

24 Hour Long Term Secured Parking At the BP Petrol Station Malaga Airport. Holiday / Golf Parking 6€ per day tel: 658 940 502 Tlfn: (+34) 669 899 065 Email: acecarrental@hotmail.co.uk www.acecarrental.biz

Urb. Lomas del Sol nº4 Benajarafe Alto, 29790 MALAGA - SPAIN

Michael/Maria Reeve Airport pick-up and delivery

Long term winter car rates

from 375€

per calender month

aUtOCOOL The only mobile service specialising solely in car air-con systems. Get your a/c serviced now before next summer and before it lets you down. Have your headlights gone opaque or yellow? Before This is now a fail on After the ITV test so get them professionally refinished. For both services call Mike now on 951 321446 or 616 264067 www.autocoolspain.com

We Buy, Sell or Exchange almost anything for cash Wanted

Calle Puente don Manuel, 52 (next to Villa Solutions)

Wanted

Wanted

www.cashonthecosta.com tel: 952 519 779 steve: 680 176 323 Lisa: 680 180 468

No more mowing, watering or dead spots! Artificial grass is the solution for a unique ground covering. For more info or a free quotation

Call: 619 317 211 www.axarverde.com

Moroccan Adventure Tours 2/3/4 nights, coastal village. Chefchaouen and the Rif Mountains. including driver with 4x4. Ferry, Top quality accommodation, meals & local guides. Groups of 2-10 people. Also available, escorted day trips to Andalucian white villages and mountain drives.

Phone: 663 458 348 / 690 771 209


To advertise call 664 210 468 or email sales@thesentinella.com

83 105

Just To Make You Smile

You didn’t save much for your retirement did you?

Superb Menu of the day Only 8.45€ 1.30pm - 4pm new A la Carte Menu Gourmet Menu Choice or Meat/Fish Only 14.45€ evenings only 7.30pm 10.30pm

Valentine’s Day

Monday 14th February (Lunch & Dinner) wStuffed Pancake with Leeks & Prawns wStuffed iberian Pork Sirloin with 3 Cheeses & Bacon with Mushroom sauce wValentine’s Dessert Live music after desserts 19.50€ Reserve your table now!!

For reservations please call: 952 965 424 or 662 086 854

Email: restaurantelsalmon@hotmail.com Avda. Andalucia 56, Torre del Mar


Do You Have Money Sitting In A Pension Fund or SIPPS That You Can’t Touch? Then Why Not Convert Your Stagnant Savings Into Income For Life?! The English Government has recently changed the law on SIPPS investments and private pensions. Under the new law investors can access their money to invest into commercial propert y operated under English law, such as propert y in the Caribbean.

Buy a 5 star luxury apartment or villa in St Lucia, St Vincents, Barbados or the Dominican Republic and increase your current pension fund income by 50% PLUS take advantage of capital appreciation at 35% per annum. Turn £50,000 into £130,000 within just 4-5 years and receive a rental income at the same time. You can also invest with cash, or via a mortgage whereby your monthly installments are paid for you!

If you’re interested in attending a seminar near you, or if you’d like to talk to an investment expert, call 610 976 284 or email info@thesentinella.com


The Garden Restaurant

In the month of February we will be closed Wednesdays & Thursdays

Breakfasts

Served from 10.30am Full English only 6€

(2 eggs, 2 bacon, 2 sausages, beans, tomatoes, mushrooms & 2 toast)

Half size - 4€

St. Valentine’s Dinners

Saturday 12th & Monday 14th Scattered Rose Petals, Soft Candle Light & Romantic Music. Spend your Valentine evening enjoying a Cava cocktail on arrival followed by a 3 course meal (3 choices on each course) accompanied by a bottle of wine or cava per couple 15€ per person Look forward to seeing you Bookings advisable

EARLY BIRD SPECIAL! Various choices of Starters & Mains or Mains & Desserts including a glass of Wine or Beer Now including Saturdays 6pm - 8pm

7.50€

Sunday Roast Choice of 3 meats

(or combination of 2 meats)

1pm - 6.30pm (last orders) 3 courses only 10€ Please call for more information:

665 070 281 618 496 269

Available for private functions, Birthdays, etc. with special menus or meals of your choice

To Puente don Manuel


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Please mention The Sentinella when responding to adverts

London Signs All these signs were spotted in and around the City of London – home of humour! in a Laundry: Automatic washing machines. Please remove all your clothes before the light goes out. in a London Department store: Bargain Basement Upstairs. in an Office: Would the person who took the stepladder kindly put it back or further steps will be taken. in another Office: After the tea break, staff should empty the teapot and stand upside down on the draining board. Outside a second hand shop: We exchange anything, bicycles, washing machines, etc. Why not bring your wife along and get a wonderful bargain.

Quicks and warning: Quicksand. Any person passing this point will be drowned. By order of the District Council. Notice in a Dry Cleaners: Anyone leaving there garments here for more than 30 days will be disposed of. in a health Food shop window: Closed due to illness. Notice in a Field: The farmer allows walkers to cross the field for free, but the bull charges. Message on a Leaflet: If you can not read this leaflet we will tell you how to get lessons. On a repair shop Door: We can repair anything. Please knock hard (the bell doesn’t work). in a toilet in a London Office Block: Toilet out of order. Please use floor below.

Found guilty for supplying a controlled substance ……

AIR at the temperature you want, at rock bottom prices

Es systems Domestic and Commercial Air Conditioning

952 550 323 / 616 119 007


To advertise call 664 210 468 or email sales@thesentinella.com

87 105

Health System In A Nutshell

The phone rings and the lady of the house answers, "Hello." "Mrs. Sanders, please." "Speaking." "Mrs. Sanders, this is Doctor Jones at Saint Agnes Laboratory. When your husband's doctor sent his biopsy to

the lab last week, a biopsy from another Mr. Sanders arrived as well... We are now uncertain which one belongs to your husband. Frankly, either way the results are not too good." "What do you mean?" Mrs. Sanders asks nervously. "Well, one of the specimens tested positive for Alzheimer's and the other one tested positive for HIV. We can't tell which is which." "That's dreadful! Can you do the test again?" questioned Mrs.Sanders. "Normally we can, but MEDICARE will only pay for these expensive tests once." "Well, what am I supposed to do now?" "The MEDICARE Helpdesk recommend that you drop your husband off somewhere in the middle of town. If he finds his way home, don't sleep with him About right eh?

Bar Triana TELEPHONE: 618 373 316 Benamargosa Road, Triana English Breakfast - Hot and Cold snacks - Quiz Night Tuesdays 8.30pm

Sunday 6th February

Sunday Lunch served 1pm - 5pm Roast Beef or Chicken plus trimmings - 8.50€ (includes dessert)

Saturday 12th February

Valentines Supper - Three courses plus bottle of wine per couple - 20.00€

Friday 25th February

Fish or Pie & Chips & Mushy Peas served 7pm - 10pm - 5.50€ Bookings please. SPECIAL OFFER: Wed, Thurs & Friday - San Miguel, Cruzcampo, Mahou or glass of wine only 1€. ***Tetley now on draught***


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Please mention The Sentinella when responding to adverts

Bumper Stickers A selection of witty and clever stickers So Many Men, So Few Who Can Afford Me. God Made Us Sisters, Prozac Made Us Friends. If They Don’t Have Chocolate In Heaven, I Aint Going. My Mother Is A Travel Agent For Guilt Trips. Princess, Having Had Sufficient Experience With Princes, Seeks Frog. Coffee, Chocolate, Men…Some Things Are Just Better Rich.

Goes Off. Guys Have Feelings Too. But Like…Who Cares? Next Mood Swing: 6 Minutes. Warning I Have An Attitude And I Know How To Use It. You Have The Right To Remain Silent So Please Shut Up. All Stressed Out And No One To Choke. I’m One Of Those Bad Things That Happen To Good People. Sorry If I Looked Interested. I’m Not.

Don’t Treat Me Any Differently Than You Would The Queen.

If We Are What We Eat, I’m Fast, Cheap And Easy.

Dinner Is Ready When The Smoke Alarm

I’m Out Of Estrogen. And I Have A Gun.

Laptop

Helps keep your laptop cool and not become a victim of overheating, which could cost you alot of money!

BUY NOw  ONLY 15€

Free delivery in Axarquia or come and see me on Tuesdays at Trapiche Market or Fridays at Chiringuito Antonio Puente don Manuel

Call: 664 210 468


BUFFET - Oriental food: Chinese, Japanese, Thai, etc... Enjoy your food! Make your salads with the quantity and ingredients you want. Meat, fish, shellfish, vegetables, etc... Choose your own conbination of flavours which you like the most and we will prepare your wok right away, in front of you. Selection of sauces: Gon Bao; Tokyo; Thai; Sweet & Sour; Curry; Wok; Oyster; Peking. You can help yourself to as much food as you want. Our staff are on standby to attend to your needs. Hours: 12:30-4:30 (Buffet price 10.25€) 7:30-12:00 (Buffet price 12.25€)

Children's Menu: Under 4's - 3€ 4-7 year olds - 6€

El Ingenio Shopping Centre, Food Court, Avenida Juan Carlos I, Velez Malaga

Call: 665 827 341


Friday Market Chiringuito Antonio Puente Don Manuel Every Friday 10am - 1.30pm Over 25 stalls to choose from and growing!! ONLY 1.50€ a PitCh!!! NEw!! NEw!! NEw!! Now inviting rastro and Car Booters Bacon roll (with English Bacon) and a Coffee is only 2.50€ if you have something interesting to sell and would like to join us at the market as a stall holder then just turn up on the day by 9am see you there!!!


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Valentine’s Gifts When we think of Valentine's gifts we tend to mull over romantic dinners, flowers, chocolates and gifts of love. If you have showered your partner with these gifts every year, why not be different this year and give him or her something unexpected and funny, which is sure to make them remember for many years to come. The gifts I would like to recommend are inexpensive and can be enjoyed by both men and women. Valentine's Day Love-O-Meter This is a fun little gadget that both you and your partner can have fun playing with together. Press your fingers on the buttons and the Love-o-meter will dig into the depths of your heart and reveal your feelings. Of course this is no fortune teller, but it is an entertaining gizmo. Body Pens If you're planning on a romantic dinner, why not have some 'dessert' with body pens afterwards. The pens come in chocolate and strawberry flavours and are a sensual way to indulge

your sweet tooth! Express your love by creating fun messages that are for your partner's eyes only. Candy Bra and Candy G-String Who would have thought that those delicious necklace sweets that we all used to love as kids would come back to haunt us in the most irresistible way! Your boyfriend or husband will enjoy eating these childhood favourite candy sweets. The irresistible, edible, candy underwear is the perfect way to end a romantic candlelight dinner. Digital Photo Frame and Digital Photo Keyring These gifts persay are not considered funny. However, you can make this fun and meaningful by downloading a collection of humorous photos before giving the gift to your partner. This is a great way to cheer your loved up when he or she is having a stressful or bad day at work. A browse through these pictures is enough to make anyone smile. Order these Valentines Day gifts online from www.myredpacket.com


NERJA

Advertise in this space Just 20 euros per month Includes short 4/5 lines of text

Call 664 210 468


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a j r e N

ja? in Ner ut. t u o b o s da Out an these place k c e h C

Start your New Year with a great way to keep fit and make new friends. Learn to dance with Yo Jive, Modern Jive classes. Modern Jive is a fusion of Jive, Salsa, Latin and a bit more. No can't dance or two left feet excuses!! It's easy, its fun and its a great way to meet new people. We can put a rhythm in your step and a smile on your face. You don't need a partner, come by yourself or bring a friend. Every Tuesday night starting at 8.30pm at El Ancla Del Cirilo, a fabulous location right on the beach in Torrox Costa on Calle Peùoncillo, N340 road between Torrox and Nerja. Beginners always welcome. If your car needs repairing, or you want to have it spray painted, visit Jonathon at artucolor. Artucolour is a general mechanics offering car body repairs and body painting. Come and see Glenn and Carlos at the Big garage. With over 40 years experience as mechanics, they speak English and Spanish and specialise in Land Rovers and 4 x 4's. They can also give your car a full service. They use genuine Bearmach Land Rover parts and accessories and they're easy to find. As you head down from the motorway turn right at the new Lidl exit, keep right and you’ll see them straight in front of you. They're open all day, Monday to Friday from 9am to 5pm. Locked yourself out of your house or having lock problems call, the 24 hour emergency Locksmith. A fully qualified UK C&G Locksmith. Or simply call to book an appointment. Come and see us at OLas the only dedicated sports lounge bar in Burriana. We have ESPN for NFL, American, German, Italian & Dutch football games as well as Premier Sports for Irish non-league and other varied sports. We are family friendly and offer a menu to suit all, plus we have a wide range of beers, Pool table and Wifi.

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Visit ink and Chips on C/Perez. They have all that you need for your PC, such as ink cartridges and perhipherals as well as laptop and printer sales. They also offer technical service 365 days a year. Don Juan on Avda. Mediterraneo serve breakfast, lunch and dinner and have great value tapas. Open from 10.30am (closed Tuesdays) serving roast dinners all day on a Sunday and they can even cater for private functions. This month they have a Arts and Craft Fayre on Saturday, 12th February from 11am until 3pm If you would like to advertise your business in our Nerja section prices are only 20 euros for a box which includes 4/5 lines of editorial to further promote your business. Please mention The Sentinella when responding to adverts. To book space call 664 210 468



VARIFOCAL LENSES

95€ FROM

Powers up to +-4.00, Supplements for hardening and anti-glare treatments from 40€

Hearing Aids also available


10â‚Ź Hotties are the leading microwave heated hot water bottle. Safe and easy to use, Hotties are ultra convenient to use, with only a couple of minutes heating in the microwave, whilst staying warm for hours.

KEEP WARM THIS WINTER! You can buy these at the following markets; Tuesdays - Trapiche Fridays - Puente don Manuel Call: 664 689 138 or email: tonyknight13@yahoo.co.uk


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97

Taj Mahal - Puente Don Manuel Let’s talk Ruby Murrays This month saw me in The Taj Mahal in Puente don Manuel. I’m a bit of curry fanatic and there is nothing better, when it starts to get a bit nippy, than a nice ruby. The Taj Mahal is situated around the side of Chiringuito Antonios, where the Friday market is located. A couple of pappadoms to start with the pickle tray and of course a bottle of Cobra beer. Now, I don’t know about you, but I get a good idea about how my meal is going to turn out by these big crisps. Usually when they’re good, my meal is too. Well these were excellent. Light, crispy and did the napkin test and dabbed them, not a spot of oil. Then came a selection of mixed starters, with various bhajis, samosa and chicken tikka. Again really flavoursome, nice bit of spice and not greasy. Things were going well. Looking around the place, I realised how nice it was in here, well decorated, clean and most importantly a little Indian

background music. To me, it makes such a difference. I ordered Prawn madras, pilau rice and keema naan (spicey minced lamb). I like hot curries, so asked for it to be so. When it came out, it was well presented on copper/brass plate warmers and dishes, again all part of the authenticity. The first mouthful is the all important one with curries. How is it going to be? How hot? etc. Well I must say, it was exceptional. The flavours of the prawns, mushrooms and spices filled my mouth then after a few seconds, the heat of the madras spices came through. I love curries where taste of the flavours are evident first then the spiciness. There are alot of establishments where the spice comes through first and then masks all of the delicious ingredients or there is too much spice which overpowers your taste buds, or even burns them right off!! No, this was a superb curry and I will definitely be visiting Ali and ruby house again. See main advert on page 13


We Unlock & Repair Mobile Phones -----------------PC/Laptop Repairs

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99

Random Jokes A white guy is walking along a beach when he comes across a lamp partially buried in the sand. He picks up the lamp and gives it a rub. Two blonde genies appear, and they tell him he has been granted three wishes. The guy makes his three wishes and the blonde genies disappear. The next thing the guy knows, he's in a bedroom, in a golf-course mansion, surrounded by 50 beautiful women. After he makes love to all of them, he begins to explore this fabulous house. Suddenly he feels something soft under his feet, he looks down and the floor is covered in 100€ notes. Then, there's a knock at the door. He answers it and standing there are two persons dressed in Ku Klux Klan outfits. They drag him outside to the nearest tree, throw a rope over a limb and hang him by the neck until he's dead. As the Klansmen are walking away, they remove their hoods. It's the two blonde genies. One blonde genie says to the other one, 'I can understand the first wish having all these beau-

78 issues 78 Months Over 61/2 years

tiful women in a big mansion to make love to. I can also understand him wanting to be a millionaire. But why he wanted to be hung like a black guy is beyond me.' ------------------------------------------------------------Moody McCoy, an elderly Irish farmer, received a letter from the Department for Work & Pensions, stating that they suspected he was not paying his employees enough and they would send an inspector to interview them. On the appointed day, the inspector turned up. "Tell me about your staff," he asked Paddy. "Well," said Paddy, "there's the farm hand, I pay him £240 a week, and he has a free cottage”. Then there's the housekeeper. She gets £190 a week, along with free board and lodging. There's also the half-wit. He works a 16 hour day, does 90% of the work, earns about £25 a week, along with a bottle of gin, and occasionally gets to sleep with my wife." "That's who I want to talk to," said the inspector, “the half-wit." "That'll be me then," said Paddy.

BE M A ST THE G O CO N S TA !!


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Newspaper Headlines Ones that escaped the sub editors eye!

County officials to talk rubbish.

Grandmother of eight makes hole in one.

Survivor of siamese twins joins parents.

Deaf mute gets new hearing in killing.

Carribean islands drift to left.

Defendant's speech ends in long sentence.

New housing for elderly not yet dead.

Asbestos suit pressed.

Town to drop school bus when overpass is ready.

Doctor testifies in horse suit. Flaming toilet seat causes evacuation at high school.

Genetic engineering splits scientists. Lung cancer in women mushrooms.

Police discover crack in Australia.

City pact fight boils.

Tuna biting off Washington coast.

Eye drops off shelf.

Men recommend more clubs for wives. Man held over giant L.A. brush fire. Traffic dead rise slowly.

Teacher strikes idle kids. Lawyers give poor free legal advise. Life means caring for hospital director.

Milk drinkers are turning to powder.

Man eating piranha mistakenly sold as pet fish.

Half-million Italian women seen on pill.

Enraged cow injures farmer with ax.

Safety experts say school bus passengers should be belted.

Lawmen from Mexico barbecue guests

Quarter of a million Chinese live on water. Drunk gets nine months in violin case.

DoES YoUR SEPTiC TANK NEED CLEANiNG? Call us and we will come & empty your septic tank. (Certified)

CONSTRUCTIONS & RENOVATIONS

652 65 60 66 Competa, Malaga www.construccionesschmid.com E-mail: construccionesschmid@hotmail.com

Miners refuse to work after death. 2 sisters reunited after 10 years in checkout counter.

Advertise in this space from just 25 euros per month. Please call for more information 664 210 468


aCt iVO CONSTRUCTION

General Building Contractors/Developers We execute the following works to the highest standard with Quality Trades Persons with over 80 years collective experience covering *General Building Works * New Builds * Construction of Swimming Pools * Terracing * Retaining Walls * Extensions * Brickwork/Blockwork * Rendering * Ceramic Tiling * Electrical & Plumbing Works (all trades) We also have a Full Plan Design Service who can advise on building licence and planning criteria approvals.

Call Calvin on: 666 659 876

2 bedroom extension with storeroom, Pergola above and stone cladding

Recently completed swimming pool/terrace and pergola Spanish registered Company NIF: X-5347443-N D.I.C. Covering La Axarquia Casa 7, Pueblo Ana Maria, Fase 2, Los Romanes, 29713, Mรกlaga


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BEM idiomas January is always a strange month, as people are still getting back into the routine of their normal lives after the festive season. For many, January represents a new lease of life. However once you read this in February, Christmas and New Year are practically forgotten about until eleven months down the line. People tend to make decisions and plan their goals, but they’re rarely achieved. February is a month when people finally get around to booking certain courses, etc. I’ll certainly be busy booking my girls into new activities at school and at the weekend. If you plan to improve or start learning Spanish then give BEM idiomas in Velez Malaga a call. With many qualified and experienced teachers, their practical lessons will help you gain self confidence, making your life here in Spain far easier. You can also study for the Spanish Diploma (D.E.L.E), which is great for your CV, professional life, or just because! I’ve decided to learn all about shoes this month so I’ll share it with you all!

School of Languages sPaNish LEssONs learn spanish with experienced teachers

Practical and useful lessons to help gain self confidence and making your life easier. From 2 hours per week / small groups or one to one Study for the Spanish Diploma - D.E.L.E. Prepare yourself for professional life; something great on your CV; or simply just for you

info@bemidiomas.com www.bemidiomas.com Camino viejo de Malaga, 12C - Velez Malaga

(952 54 92 33

sandalias – sandals zapatillas de baño/ducho – bathing/shower shoes zapatillas de deporte – trainers zapatillas de tenis – tennis shoes zapatos – shoes zapatos de caballero – men’s shoes zapatos de niños – children’s shoes

botas – boots

zapatos de señora – women’s shoes

botas de esquiar – ski boots

Don’t delay! Call Viviane at 952 54 9233

botas de moñtana – hiking boots

www.bemidiomas.com


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$$$ Share´oscope $$$

103

Kids Kitchen Items

Eye to share'oscope.. .what do I see?!

For budding Jamie Olivers

Last month's share, Xcite Energy, were purchased at 240p and they're now up to 368p, which is a mighty fine rise in such a short space of time.

BOiL: The point a parent reaches upon hearing the automatic "Yuck" before a food is even tasted.

This month Mr Stockmarket has bought 41,666 Ortac Resources Ltd at 2.40p. Catch up next month to see how January and February's picks are doing and to see what share makes the pot for March. Happy Investing! PLEasE NOtE The investments we make are fictitious. Profits are not guaranteed, so please only invest what you can afford to lose!

$ $ $

CassErOLE: Combination of favourite foods that go uneaten because they are mixed together. DEssErt: The reason for eating a meal. EVaPOratE: Magic trick performed by children when it comes time to clear the table or wash dishes. FrUit: A natural sweet not to be confused with dessert. rEFrigEratOr: A very expensive and inefficient room air conditioner when not being used as an art gallery. taBLE LEg: Percussion instrument


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Mind, Body & Spirit Visiting my family in ireland this Christmas brought me face to face with the flu, which had been sweeping the country. Everyone was either in the throes of, going down with, or recovering from the extremely unpleasant and debilitating virus. Meanwhile, the tV news and newspapers repeated strident warnings from health officials to get inoculated with the flu jab. On the flight home to Spain, as I breathed a sigh of relief at having escaped unscathed. I read in the paper that the numbers affected this year were more than double those for the same period of the previous year and I found myself wondering what could be the cause of such a dramatic increase. Admittedly, there had been a prolonged spell of snow and icy weather, meaning some unfortunate people were exposed to very cold living conditions, but then there had been a similar “big freeze” last year. Our immune system forms a highly effective bio-logical protection against marauding germs and viruses. As well as its legacy of acquired immunity, it has the capacity to recognise new antigens and mount a rapid response to them; a microbiological “scramble defence." Like all of our organic systems, the immune system functions most effectively within an overall healthy lifestyle. Above all, it has been proven that a positive mental attitude, high self-esteem, fundamental happiness and enthusiasm support the immune system in working at optimum efficiency to keep us healthy. So what then could have compromised the

population’s collective immunity to such an extent? Firstly, it has to be said that Christmas is an unhealthy season! We celebrate by spending more time indoors in crowded overheated rooms, ideal conditions for incubating and spreading infections, while imbibing excessive alcohol and rich foods. This overloads our digestive and excretory systems and puts the immune system under massive stress. But what of the other, more subtle factors of mind and attitude? I am not a believer in vaccination. While it may be advisable in extreme cases, mostly it undermines and compromises our natural capacity to evade and overcome illness. Resorting to externally derived pharmaceutical drugs and antibiotics, including vaccines, also weakens our belief in ourselves, our innate capacity for health and our inner microbiological strength. In the analogy of warfare and siege, resorting to vaccines and drugs is akin to having a “traitor within the gates.” Once you become convinced that your health and protection depends on something outside of yourself, your inner defences are disabled. One final observation. Just prior to this mini epidemic, Ireland had been forced to accept an enormous financial bail-out to save its sinking economy. The public reacted with anger, betrayal and humiliation; a collective nose-dive of self-esteem and a pervading despondency about the future. Could this have made the difference in the statistics between last year and this year?


Special offer for February: Enjoy a Valentine’s meal everyday in February and enjoy Special Hotel Offers when you combine your meal with a stay in one of our lovely snail rooms on any weekend in February Open Everyday - Unique styled, Bungalows, Rooms & Romantic packages available Ctra. Frigiliana-Torrox km 4.5 Tel: 952 03 06 80

www.hotelloscaracoles.es

Heather Gail Harman b.a hons

New enrolees welcome to join Heather's highly successful Drawing and Painting Classes. Beginners welcome Puente don Manuel - Mondays Torre del Mar/Benajarafe - Thursdays Lake ViĂąuela - Fridays

For further details contact Heather Tel: 952 115 366 Mob: 628 306 371

Local, National and European Removals Airfreight Shipments and Overseas Removals Worldwide Reliable, swift and delicate handling of your personal belongings, either for your domestic or international removal or for storage purposes. Salobrena Based - New Removals Store Open Now! Great Service, Fair Price

Tel: 685 360 193

www.arnoldremovals.es


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y r a i D

es h e t a D r T t´s on ? Fo iWnhyaour area

Every Tuesday Country Farmers Market between 10am and 2pm. Los Jardines del Trapiche Call: Anita 627 877 164 Every Tuesday Bar Atila, Puente don Manuel, Quiz 8.30pm. Call: 685 552 529. Every Tuesday Bar Triana Ctr. Bemamargosa, Triana. Quiz night 8.30p.m. Call: 618 373 316 Every Wednesday Modern Jive Dancing. Restaurante Parquesol, Torrox Costa. 8.30pm. Modern Jive dancing with tuition. Tel: Jacqueline 658 729 274 Every Thursday Evening Bar Viva, Torre del Mar, Quiz night from 8.30pm with cash prizes. APARIV Charity Quiz last Friday of every month. Call 952 544 362

Every Thursday Bar Atila, Puente don Manuel, Bingo 8pm. Call 685 552 529 Every Thursday Fonzies Paul´s Quiz with cash prizes. Cruce de Periana, Puente don Manuel 952 519 733 Every Friday Chiringuito Antonio Market, 10am - 2pm Puente don Manuel, Art Exhibition by Axarquia Art - Sat 15th Jan - Sat 12th Feb. The Axarquia Art group is holding its “New Year – New Art” exhibition at the Ethnographic Museum, Riogordo. The exhibition shows high quality work from 10 artists, many well known in the Axarquia region. Calle Iglesia 14, Riogordo is open to the public on Friday, Saturday and Sunday from 10am until 2pm & 4pm until 8pm. axarquiaart@gmail.com www.axarquiaart.blogspot.com Heather Gail Harmens drawing and painting classes. Puente don Manuel every MondayTorre del Mar/Benajarafe every Thursdays and Lake Viñuela every Friday. Call 952 115 366 / 628 306 371 for details.


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107

Hospital Stories These are actual events 1. A man dashes into the A&E dept. and yells, 'My wife's going to have her baby in the taxi'. I grabbed my stuff, rushed out to the taxi, lifted the lady's dress and began to take off her underwear. Suddenly after protests from the lady I noticed that there were several taxis - - - and I was in the wrong one. Submitted by Dr. Mark MacDonald, St. Andrews Hosp. Glasgow 2. At the beginning of my shift, I placed a stethoscope on an elderly and slightly deaf female patient's anterior chest wall. 'Big breaths,'. I instructed. 'Yes, they used to be,'. . . replied the patient.. Submitted by Dr. Richard Barnes, St.Thomas's Bath 3. One day I had to be the bearer of bad news when I told a wife that her husband had died of

a massive myocardial infarct. Not more than five minutes later, I heard her on her mobile phone reporting to the rest of the family that he had died of a 'massive internal fart.' Submitted by Dr. Susan Steinberg Royal London Hospital 4. During a patient's two week follow-up appointment, he told me that he was having trouble with one of his medications. 'Which one?'. . .. I asked. 'The patch; the Nurse told me to put on a new one every six hours and now I'm running out of places to put it!' I had him quickly undress and discovered what I hoped I wouldn't see. Yes, the man had over fifty patches on his body! Now, the instructions includes removal of the old patch before applying a new one. Submitted by Dr. Rebecca St. Clair, Norfolk General

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Valentines Day Around The World Looking at the Special day around the globe australia During the Australian gold rush period, miners who were suddenly in possession of money from the new-found wealth of the Ballarat Mines were willing to pay a princely sum for elaborate valentines and merchants in the country to ship orders amounting to thousands of pounds at a time. The most extravagent Australian valentines were made of a satin cushion, perfumed and decorated in an ornate manner with flowers and coloured shells. Some were even adorned with a taxidermied humming bird, or a bird of paradise. This treasure, contained within a neatly decorated box, was highly valued, being both fashionable and extremely expensive. austria Austria has some rather obscure courtship customs that may or may not be associated with Saint Valentine's Day. Nonetheless, it is customary for a young man to present his beloved with a bunch of flowers on 14th February. america In the USA, many varieties of cards have been given over the course of the years, some of which have often been rude or even quite cruel in their humour. In the times of the Civil War, cards were flagged with rich colours accompanied by patriotic and/or political motifs. Early American valentine cards were especially lithographed and hand-coloured, beautiful and distinctive in design, produced with intricate lace paper and decorated with beads, sea shells, cones, berries and seeds. Cards were also decorated with seaweed or moss, in addition to dried and/or artificial flowers, all of which were attached to a string which was pulled and could then be suspended, thereby creating a three-dimensional picture. Many early American cards were imported from abroad. Today, American children usually exchange valentines with their friends and there may even be a classroom party. great Britain The poets of Britain have probably penned the

majority of the best-loved romantic verses associated with Saint Valentine. Different regions of the nation celebrate their own customs to honour this day, although the sending of cards and gifts of flowers and chocolates is standard procedure throughout the entire country. One uniform custom is the singing of special songs by children, who then receive gifts of candy, fruit or money. In some areas, valentine buns are baked with caraway seeds, plums or raisins. Denmark The Danish valentine card is known as a "lover's card." Older versions of this greeting came in the form of a transparency which, when held up to the light, depicted the image of a lover handing his beloved a gift. One custom in Denmark is for people to send pressed white flowers called Snowdrops to their friends. Danish men may also send a form of valentine known as a gaekkebrev (or "joking letter"). The sender of this gaekkebrev pens a rhyme but does not sign his name. Instead, he signs the message with dots...one dot for each letter in his name. If the lady who receives the card guesses the name of the sender, she is rewarded with an Easter Egg later in the year. France In France, a custom known as "drawing for" once occurred. Unmarried individuals, both young and not so young, would go into houses facing each other and begin calling out across from one window to another, pairing-off with the chosen partner. If the young man failed to be particularly enthralled with his valentine, he would desert her. As a result, a bonfire would be lit later where the ladies could burn images of the ungrateful sweetheart and verbally abuse him in a loud tone as the effigy burned. This ritual was eventually abandoned since it left much room for nastiness, ridicule or even outright malice and the French government finally handed-down a decree officially banning the custom. Elegant French greetings cards known as cartes d'amities, which contained tender messages, were given not totally as a Valentine but chiefly as a result of a fashion which was popular in England at the time.


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Valentines Day Around The World (Continued) germany In Germany, it has become customary for the young man of a courting couple to present his beloved with flowers on 14th February. Valentine gifts in Germany are usually in the shape of love tokens, complete with endearing messages. However, these are not distributed solely on Valentine's Day, but on any occasion. italy In Italy, Valentine's Day was once celebrated as a Spring Festival, held in the open air, where young people would gather in tree arbors or ornamental gardens to listen to music and the reading of poetry. However, over the course of the years, this custom steadily ceased and has not now been celebrated for centuries. In Turin, it was formerly the custom for betrothed couples to announce their engagements on 14th February. For several days ahead of time, the stores would be decorated and filled with all manner of bon-bons. Japan

In Japan, Valentine's Day is celebrated on two different dates...February 14 and March 14. On the first date, the female gives a gift to the male and on the second date...known as White Day and supposedly introduced by a marshmallow company in the 1960s...the male has to return the gift he received on 14th February. Thus, strictly speaking, a Japanese female has the luxury of actually choosing her own gift. Chocolate is the most popular gift in Japan. However, since most Japanese females believe that store-bought chocolate is not a gift of true love, they tend to make the confection with their own hands. korea The traditional gift of candy takes place in Korea on 14th February, but only from females to males. There is another special day for males to give gifts to females and this is celebrated on March 14. Very similar to the custom in Japan, 14th March in Korea is known as "White Day." On "White Day," many young men confess their love for the first time to their sweethearts.

WE OPEN ON 11th FEBRUARY A warm welcome to all Celebrate your Valentine´s Day with us & Enjoy the Absolute Indian Experience

Bookings now being taken from 4th February


MIXERS

TONY’S POKERS TOOL HIRE

All types of tools Chainsaw Sharpening Service

Alcaucin Based

Mini Digger For Hire For more details call:

693 505 272 693 286 625

WACKER PLATES

ACADEMIA GALA SpaniSh CourSeS intenSive & ConverSational all levelS available Including for children starting school C/ Maestro Duran Lopez 6 Torre del Mar

tel: 952 54 40 39

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111

Trapiche Social Club At the recent Annual General Meeting, the Members of Trapiche Social Club voted to elect the following officers: Chairman John Rundlett Vice Chairman Roger Woodland Treasurer Stuart Wooder Secretary Gloria Hollocks together with various other Committee Members. This Club was formed from most of the Members of the now dissolved Trapiche RBL. We have been joined by a number of other like minded people. Contrary to rumour, there is no interview held for prospective Members. EVERYONE is welcome to visit us. In our first year of operation, the Club Committee has decided NOT to levy a joining Fee AND

the First YEAR’S SUBSCRIPTION will be FREE. We meet every Wednesday from 12 Noon at El Trapiche Restaurant just off the A356 at Trapiche. A warm welcome awaits our Members old and new. We have various Social activities every Wednesday, card games (bridge and cribbage and any other requested), skittles and occasionally bingo. We are organising a monthly trip or function as well as a monthly lunch. As we are setting up as a Charitable Organisation, a percentage of any profit will be given to a Charity of our Members’ choice. Further information from the Publicity Office run by Gordon Reith by phone 951 239 366 or email suegordonr@yahoo.co.uk or from any Officer or Committee Member.

T H E  D O G  H O U S E While you are away on holiday or a weekend break, your dogs live in our house alongside our dog. *Large Enclosed Play Area *Lots of Country Walks *Pet Collection / Delivery Service *Vet Services - On Call *Gourmet Meals

‘ONLy

THE bEST FOR yOUR PAL’

Ring: Phil (mob) 649 079 321 Email: philipclayton_1@msn.com Comares / Benamargosa Ex - cat & dog airlines.uk Recommended

Refs Available


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? n O s ’ t Wh a

sponsored by:

RIGHTS ARKW The British Store & More OPEN ALL “OURS” Puente don Manuel Call: 952 519 780 www.arkwrights-groceries.com

Royal British Legion Torre del Mar February Events: We meet every Wed between 12-2pm at the La Vega Rest. next to Mercadona supermarket. All ages welcome-various activities held at the Weekly Meetings. 2nd Weekly meeting with Games club, 3rd Trip to Gibraltar 10€, 9th Weekly meeting with Games club, 16th Weekly meeting with Games club, 23rd Weekly meeting with Games club, 24th Monthly Lunch – Rib House Torrox Costa 12€ 13€. Bookings 663 658 354 (9am-5pm), Welfare 628 343 198, Membership 617 997 095 rbl-tdm@hotmail.com Website at www.rbl-torredelmar.org.uk Lux Mundi Torre del Mar Jan Events: 1st Closed Holiday, 3-4-5 Only open 10 till 1pm, 6th Closed Holiday, 10th Film Night, 18th-25th Week of prayer for Christian Unity, 20th Trip to Gibraltar. Every Mon 3pm-5pm German speaking afternoon, Every Tues Music Appreciation Soc, Every Wed 3pm-5pm Art Group 5:30 Choir Practice, Every Fri 11am-1pm Coffee morning & Boutique, Every Sat 5pm Catholic Church service, Every Sun 10:30am Anglican Service St. Barnabas. Deposits required for all trips & events. Tel: 952 543 334 Alcaucin Branch of TRBL meets every Thursday noon at the Bar Atila, Puente Don Manuel to enjoy social activities and meet new like minded friends. We regularly have a quiz, bingo, surprise events and presentations. Regular trips are arranged departing locally. Branch Contact is 680491109. Harvey (please note this is a new number) Welfare Contact is 690 310 951 Dorothy, Social Contact is 636 203 135 Barbara RBL - Los Romanes Branch We are still a branch of the Royal British Legion. NEW VENUE - The Garden Restaurant, La Vinuela. We meet every Tuesday from 12.00 noon until

2.00 pm. at the above. On the first Tuesday of every month we have menu del dia at the restaurant. Please feel free to come and join us any time, you do not have to be a member. For social contact Lorraine on 952510203. For other contact Margaret on 951 167 600. Visit our web site on www.rbl-losromanes.org.uk Come Dancing for Cudeca invite you to a late Valentine´s and surprise 70th birthday dance on Saturday 19th February at El Trapiche Restaurant. Only 10€. Fish or Chicken supper included. All the usual social mix of ballroom, old time, simple sequence, scottish reels and jive and spot prizes. For reservations/meal choices phone Joyce on 616 046 713 or Mike on 952 510 189 or emai: jjmunns@gmail.com Donations of raffle prizes very welcome Total collected for Cudeca's Hospice so far through our raffles is 3,931€ Golfnutz meet every Wednesday at Santa Clara (Otura, Granada) for golf banter, all abilities welcome. Sense of humour essential. So if you need a change in 2011 then give us a call. Call 617 979 640 or caddy master on 858 702 800. February 11th quiz night to raise money for APARIV Animal Protection Society with Prizes, Raffles and Food Available at Los Morenos Restaurant in Rincon de la Victoria 8pm. Call Stephen 952 514 671. Feb 16th at Sands & C in Torrox Costa at 7:30pm. Call 685 909718. 25th Feb at Bar Viva in Torre del Mar 8pm. Call Stephen 952 514 671 Acoustic Roots gigs for February issue: Mon 14th February: Valentines Night Dinner in aid of CAS, Hostal La Ermita Nerja, Nerja. Friday 4th March: El Ancla de Cirilo, Torrox Costa, Food Available: Tel 952 967103. CAS 10th Feb CAS quiz night Sabor de Amor Bistro, Playa Burriana, food available from 7pm. Quiz starts 9pm 3€ per person call 626 354 183 to book.

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What’s O n? Dance Time - Come to our VALENTINE'S DAY DINNER AND DANCE, not just for two but also to see lots of friends. Plenty of romantic music to dance to, not forgetting the great food and a surprise gift for all the ladies. Early booking advisable. El Trapiche Restaurant, Saturday 12th February 7.30 - 11.30pm. Menu choice, Pork chop, Chicken or Rosada. Tickets 12.50€. For reservations: English: 952 550 497, Deutsch: 952 115 717 Lux Mundi Music Appreciation Group meets each Tues from 3.00p.m until 5.00p.m. at the Lux Mundi Centre in Torre del Mar. The sessions are focused upon a composer or a period of classical music. We listen and enjoy a selection of the works. Further information from Keith Hicks, telephone 637255299. Yo Jive Modern Jive Dance Classes have a great new venue in Torrox Costa. Every Tuesday 8.30pm. Modern Jive is easy, fun and a great way of meeting new people. You dont need a partner come by yourself or bring a friend. Beginners always welcome. Join us Tuesday nights at El Ancla de Cirilo, Calle de Peñoncillo, Torrox Costa on the N-340 between Nerja and Torrox Costa. info@yojive.com Dancing is good exercise as well as good social fun! David would like to thank everyone for a great start to the season and welcomes members old and new to join him for lessons every Monday 5pm - 7pm at Trapiche Restaurant. For more information contact David on 952 531 259 or 617 863 193 (mobile). Nerja History Group meets on the first Friday of each month at the Cultural Centre, Calle Granada, Nerja at 11.30. For more information, contact Jill Christian-Smith on: 952 538 526 664 760 405 jill.christiansmith.gmail.com Lodge of European Fraternity No. 52. Meet in Maro every 3rd. Thursday during the winter months, and most Mon evenings for L.O.I. Tel for details 678043486 or 608750980 Pinguinitos Swim School Swimming lessons for all ages. Call Virginia Millington 952 533

236 or 662 463 452 vajmgo@yahoo.co.uk RBL - Benajarafe Branch Meet every Friday from 12.30 to 2.30pm, at the coastal, Puerto Niza restaurant, we enjoy bingo, quizzes, more entertainment and monthly outings, a superb lunch inc. drinks, and we welcome all new and existing RBL members. Call 952 514 226 or 669 201 927 Trapiche Social Club February Events - 2nd Social Activities, 9th social activities, 14th Valentine’s Supper and Dance at El Trapiche Restaurant, 16th Social and Monthly Lunch, 23rd Social activities. Social Activities include card games, skittles and dominoes. Book by telephone on 680 764 130. Or at Trapiche Restaurant on Wednesdays between 12.00 and 13.30. The Club meets at Trapiche Restaurant on Wednesdays between 12.00 and 14.00 A warm welcome awaits you from a bunch of friendly people FHT Axarquia Therapists’ Support Group. Next meeting Wednesday, 30th March at 7.30pm at The Camping Bar Restaurant, Vinuela. The speaker is yet to be confirmed. I would be pleased to hear from any Therapists that would be interested in speaking at future meetings. All are welcome to join us and further details can be obtained from Jenny Wright by email:jennywright04@gmail.com or by telephone: 951 321 613 or 633759988 QI GONG and TAI CHI - start the New Year with a visit to one of these classes and improve your balance, health and general well-being. Wednesday, 11 am – Bar 02, Colmenar, Thursday, 3pm - El Duende, Los Ventorros, near Comares, and Friday, 11am – Bar Trapiche, Trapiche, and another class at Bar Lemon Tree, Rio Gordo on Mon or Tues. Contact Paul Bradley on 653333733 for further details. Fantastic value for money, La Vaqueria Curry Night. Sat Feb 5th from 7pm. 4 courses of authentically prepared Indian food for just 9€. Bring your own drinks if you like to help make it a really affordable evening. Bookings 952517273 or studio.20lavaqueria.com

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n o i t a m r Info ...In our own random order! Bus Times Call: 952 540 936 Nerja-Malaga 06:30, 07:30, 08:30 08:55, 10:10, 11:10, 12:25, 13:40, 14:55, 15:55, 17:10, 18:40, 19:40, 20:25 Malaga-Nerja 07:00, 08:15, 09:15, 10:30, 11:45, 12:30, 13:00, 14:00, 15:15; 17:30; 18:45, 20:15, 20:45, 21:30 Expect to pay approx 2.90€ one way and 5.15€ round trip Nerja-Nerja Caves 08:10, 08:25, 09:40, 10:40, 11:50; 11:55, 12:35, 13:10, 13:35, 14:25, 15:25; 16:40; 18:10, 18:55, 19:30, 20:10 Nerja Caves-Nerja 08:45, 10:00, 11:00, 12:00, 12:15, 12:50, 13:30, 14:45. 15:45, 17:00 17:45; 18:30; 19:30; 20:15 Expect to pay approx 0.80€ one way Nerja-torre see Nerja-Malaga times torre-Nerja 07:45, 09:00, 09:15, 10:00, 11:00, 11:15; 11:45, 12:30, 13:15, 14:45, 16:00, 17:30, 18:15, 19:30, 21:00, 22:00. Church services in English anglican - Services - Inglesia de San Miquel (St Michael’s Church) Nerja - every Sunday at 12 noon (except during May). Short Holy Communion Service Wednesdays at 09.30am at the Church Shop, calle malaga, Nerja. Call: 952 521 339 / 952 522 460 Competa - Holy Communion every Sunday at 5.30pm in the Parish Church, Plaza Almijara, Cómpeta Tel: 952 219 396 Malaga - St. George´s Church in the Engish Cemetery. 11.00am Sundays Tel: 952 219 396 torre del Mar - Sanysol Residencia, Saturdays 6.00 pm. Tel: 952 219 396 anglican communion. torre del Mar - Services in English - St. Barnabas IERE (Anglican). Holy Communion 11am. 2nd and 4th Sundays. Morning Prayer 1st and 3rd Sundays. 6pm. Evensong 1st Sunday, all at Lux Mundi Centre, Calle Casa de la Vina,

Local Police : 091 guardia : 062 Fire : 080 two minutes walk from the bus station. Tel: 952-030-461 (Priest) or 952 510 056 (Churchwarden). roman Catholic - torre del Mar - Lux Mundi Ecumenical Centre, Saturdays 5pm, (Winter), Saturdays 6pm, (Summer) Church of scotland Lux Mundi Ecumenical Centre - Worship every Sunday at 11:30 Tel 952543334 or 687764705 for more information. Evangelical - torre del Mar Evangelical (Presbyterian Church) meets every Sunday for Worship in English at 11.30am in the Picasso Room, Hotel Torremar, (off Paseo Larios) C/ Saladero Viejo 15 Torre del Mar. All welcome. Minister J. Hartsmith Foy. Tel: 952 532 825 or: www.torredelmarchurch.org torrox Park Community Church meet at 11am on Thursday for coffee and discussion on current topics. This is an informal meeting for everyone to join in. At Tapricho Tapas bar (opposite El Pino camping), Torrox park. more info: Minister J. hartsmith foy, Tel: 952 532 825 or www.torroxparkchurch.org. Puente don Manuel - Fellowship of the King, Sunday Worship - 11am. Wednesday Fellowship - fortnightly 7pm. Midweek activities - Pilates - Tues midday-1pm, Bridge club tues 2.15-6pm, Art group Thurs 3-5pm, Charity shop/books Fri 10-2pm, Camera club 1st Fri of month 2.30-5pm. We meet at Fellowship of the King premises situated underneath Maroma Inmobiliaria, El Cruce de Puente don Manuel. Phone 952 115 220 or 952 518 185 Bank hours Usually 8:30am-2pm except Sundays, Bank holidays and Fiestas. Please note, the majority of banks will not accept bills to be paid (ie: electric, phone, rates) after 11am. taxis torre: 952 540 016, Nerja: 952 520 537 Velez Malaga: 952 540 016, Puente Don Manuel: 952 510 992 Mob: 616 034 636.

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ambulance : 061 water : 952 540 662 Electricity : 952 540 662 tourist information Nerja: 952 521 531 torre del Mar: 952 541 104 weekly Market days Mondays: Torrox Costa tuesdays: Nerja & Country Farmers Market, at Jardines del Trapiche on the road to Benamagosa. wednesdays; Rincon de la Victoria & Algarrobo Costa thursdays: Velez Malaga & Torre del Mar & Frigilana Fridays: Puente don Manuel & Cala de Moral saturdays: Caleta de Velez & Competa sundays: Malaga Consulates Uk Opposite the main bus station Edif, Eurocom Bloque Sur C/Mauricio Moro 2-2º- Malaga 952 352 300 ireland Avda, de los Boliches, Nº15 Fuengirola 952 475 108 Netherlands/Dutch Avda, Carlota Alesandria, 33 Edif. San Andres - 1º-7 Torremolinos 952 380 888 germany C/Mauricio Moro 2, Malaga 952 363 591 sweden 952 604 383 France 952 226 590 / 952 214 888 Belgium 952 559 159 Denmark 952 211 797 Luxembourg 952 857 197 telefonica Dial 1002 to report a fault on the line. For general enquiries dial 1004

Informa

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tion

airports Malaga 24-hour information 952 048 484 or 952 048 804 granada 952 048 804 airlines www.easyjet.com www.ryanair.com www.thompsonfly.com www.flymonarch.com www.flybe.com www.bmibaby.com shops 10am - 2pm - 5pm - 8:30pm (generally) The municipal market (fruit and veg) and the weekly markets are only open mornings. water supplies Velez Malaga: 952 506 450 Nerja: 952 520 154 Malaga: 952 135 013 railway stations Malaga: 952 360 202 granada: 958 271 272 town halls torre and Velez: 952 500 100 torrox: 952 538 200 Nerja: 952 548 400 Competa: 952 516 006 rincon: 952 402 300 Malaga: 952 135 000 hospitals Nerja ambulatorio: 952 523 131 Velez Malaga: 951 067 000 itV Call: 902 575 757 or 952 551 084 www.itvcita.com - Open Mon - Fri 08.00am 18.45pm, Sat: 08:00am - 12.45pm

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s e g a P Puzzle Get Quizical

Hey Diddle Riddle This month can you work out these What Am I’s?

1. What kind of creature is a Tope? 2. Tomsk stands on which river?

1. I can sizzle like bacon, I am made with an egg, I have plenty of backbone, but lack a good leg, I peel layers like onions, but still remain whole, I can be long, like a flagpole, yet fit in a hole, What am I?

3. What is a Turbit? 4. In which city was Marie Curie born? 5. Whose motto was Legio Patria Nostra? 6. The Bismark sea is part of which ocean? 7. What S is another name for "Bigfoot"? 8. What is demography the study of? 9. What type of creature is a Gila Monster? 10. What does glabrous mean?

2. I travel all over the world, but always stay in the corner. What am I? 3. This thing has 7 letters. It is greater than god, More evil than the devil, Poor people have it, Rich people need it, And if you eat or drink it, you will die. What is it?

4. I come in different shapes and sizes. Part of me are curves, others are straight. You can put me anywhere you like, but there is only one right place for me. 12. In heraldry what does Sejant mean? What am I? Answers on page 121 11. What is homiletics?

Sudokus Easy

Tough


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117

Puzzle P ages

Crossword Two sets of clues but the same answer across

Cryptic Clues

1 Calamity when Tom has eastern port rebuilt (11) 9 Show agreement when lecturer about (3) 10 English boy better at heart given shoulder decoration (9) 11 Broke our laces on the roundabout (8) 12 Mix pate for fuel (4) 14 Far-off meteor explosion (6) 16 Metal bearing carried by man (6) 18 Cut and pinch (4) 19 Singer, very old, about to register (8) 22 Confused Ethelred's protected (9) 23 In favour of support for the most part (3) 24 For a change, help pad nice furniture (11)

Down 2 More down when beheaded reptile (5) 3 These days, to compare is enough (8) 4 Bullet's right after outline (6) 5 Constable's medium soil preparation (4) 6 Those upset at position of responsibility (3,4) 7 Imprecise historical event destroying Roman chains (11) 8 Return to give speech after break (11) 13 Considered worthy of respect (8) 15 Play in match and be beaten (7) 17 Force to close bracket periodically (6) 20 Sprite wanted by the Spanish force (5) 21 Domestic creatures going back a pace (4)

across

Quick Clues

1 Calamity (11) 9 Show agreement (3) 10 Military shoulder piece (9) 11 Luggage conveyor (8) 12 Turf used for fuel (4) 14 Far from anywhere (6) 16 Metallic grey (6)

18 Small cut (4) 19 Singer (8) 22 Given refuge (9) 23 In favour of (3) 24 Style of 18th Century furniture (11)

Down 2 Viper (5) 3 Sufficient (8) 4 Visible bullet (6) 5 Lubricates (4) 6 Difficult position [3,4] (7) 7 Thing appropriate to another time (11) 8 Process of repairing a building (11) 13 Considered (8) 15 Shakespeare's ‘Scottish play' (7) 17 Browbeat (6) 20 Force (5) 21 Dance move (4)


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:) a h a h Jokes Mick and Paddy had promised their uncle Seamus, who had been a seafaring gent all his life, to bury him at sea when he died. Of course, in due time, he did pass away and the boys kept their promise. They set off with Uncle Seamus all stitched up in a burial bag and loaded onto their rowboat. After a while Mick says, 'Do yer tink dis is fer enuff out, Paddy?' Without a word Paddy slips over the side only to find himself standing in water up to his knees. ‘Dis'll never do, Mick. Let's row some more.' After a bit more rowing Paddy slips over the side again but the water is only up to his belly, so they row on. Again Mick asks Paddy, 'Do yer tink dis is fer enuff out Paddy?' Once again Paddy slips over the side and almost immediately says, 'No dis'll neva do’. The water was only up to his chest. So on they row and row and row and finally Paddy slips over the side and disappears. Quite a bit of time goes by and poor Mick is really getting himself into a state when suddenly Paddy breaks the surface gasping for breath. 'Well is it deep enuff yet, Paddy?' 'Aye'tis. Now hand me dat shovel.' ------------------------------------------------------------A little old lady was walking down the street dragging two plastic rubbish bags behind her. One of the bags rips and every once in a while a €20 bill falls out onto the pavement. Noticing this, a policeman stops her, and says, "Ma'am, there are €20 bills falling out of your bag." "Oh, really? Damn!" said the little old lady. "I'd better go back, and see if I can find them. Thanks for telling me." "Well, now, not so fast," says the cop. "How did you get all that money? You didn't steal it, did you?" "Oh, no", said the little old lady. "You see, my back garden is right next to the football stadium car park. On game days, a lot of fans come and

pee through a hole in the fence and onto my flower garden. So I stand behind the fence with my hedge clippers. Each time some guy sticks his "thingie" through the fence, I grab it and say, €20 or it comes off.” "Well, that seems only fair" laughs the cop. "OK. Good luck! Oh, by the way, what's in the other bag?" "Well, you know, not everybody pays"...... ------------------------------------------------------------Mrs. Donovan was walking down O'Connell Street in Dublin when she met up with Father Flaherty. The Father said, 'Top o' the mornin' o ye! Aren't ye Mrs. Donovan and didn't I marry ye and yer hoosband two years ago?' She replied, 'Aye, that ye did, Father.' The Father asked, 'And be there any wee little ones yet?' She replied, 'No, not yet, Father.' The Father said, 'Well now, I'm going to Rome next week and I'll light a fertility candle for ye and yer hoosband.' She replied, 'Oh, thank ye, Father...' They then parted ways.. Some years later they met again. The Father asked, 'Well now, Mrs. Donovan, how are ye these days?' She replied, 'Oh, very well, Father!' The Father asked, 'And tell me, have ye any wee ones yet?' She replied, 'Oh yes, Father! Two sets of twins and six singles, ten in all!' The Father said, 'That's wonderful! How is yer loving hoosband doing?' She replied, 'E's gone to Rome to blow out yer fookin' candle.' ------------------------------------------------------------Paddy goes to the vet with his goldfish. "I think it's got epilepsy" he tells the vet. Vet takes a look and says "It seems calm enough to me". Paddy says, "I haven't taken it out of the bowl yet".

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Jokes h a h a :) The Navy found they had too many officers and decided to offer an early retirement bonus. They promised any officer who volunteered for Retirement a bonus of $1,000 for every inch measured in a straight line between any two points in his body. The officer got to choose what those two points would be. The first officer who accepted asked that he be measured from the top of his head to the tip of his toes. He was measured at six feet and walked out with a bonus of $72,000. The second officer who accepted was a little smarter and asked to be measured from the tip of his outstretched hands to his toes. He walked out with $96,000. The third one was a noncommissioned officer, a grizzly old bastard of a navy Chief who, when asked where he would like to be measured replied, 'From the tip of my weenie to my testicles.' It was suggested by the pension man that he might want to reconsider, explaining about the nice big checks the previous two Officers had received. But the old Chief insisted and they decided to go along with him providing the measurement was taken by a Medical Officer. The Medical Officer arrived and instructed the Chief to 'drop 'em,' which He did.. The medical officer placed the tape measure on the tip of the Chief's weenie and began to work back. Dear Lord!' he suddenly exclaimed, 'Where Are your testicles?' The old Chief calmly replied, 'Vietnam.' ------------------------------------------------------------Sister Mary Katherine entered the Monastery of Silence. The Priest said, 'Sister, this is a silent monastery. You are welcome here as long as you like, but you may not speak until I direct you to do so.' Sister Mary Katherine lived in the monastery for 5 years before the Priest said to her, 'Sister Mary Katherine, you have been here for 5 years. You can speak two words.'

Sister Mary Katherine said, 'Hard bed.' 'I'm sorry to hear that,' the Priest said, 'We will get you a better bed.' After another 5 years, Sister Mary Katherine was called by the Priest. 'You may say another two words, Sister Mary Katherine. 'Cold food,' said Sister Mary Katherine, and the Priest assured her that the food would be better in the future. On her 15th anniversary at the monastery, the Priest again called Sister Mary Katherine into his office. 'You may say two words today.' 'I quit,' said Sister Mary Katherine . 'It's probably best', said the Priest, 'You've done f**k all but moan since you've been here.' ------------------------------------------------------------A 75 year old lady says to her husband, "You know what, I think I'll go to the doctor and get a checkup." Her husband says, "Sure, thats a good idea dear." So she makes an appointment to see Dr. Levine, a gynecologist, and explains that she has not had a checkup in 25 years. Dr Levine tells her to get undressed and put on a gown so he can check everything out. The Doctor puts his hand under her gown, lifts her right breast and tells her to say, "99" She says "99" "I see nothing wrong there," says the Doctor. He then puts his hand under her gown, lifts her left breast and repeats, "Say 99" She says "99" Dr. Levine says everything seems ok with this one also. "We might as well check your other vitals, lay down on the table and put your feet in the stirrups." He puts on the rubber glove and some KY on the glove and is checking her private parts for any signs of lumps, etc. Once more he tells her, "Say 99." She says, "One, two, three.........."

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s n g i S r Sta Mystic Mag paints the bigger picture for February, 2011… Capricorn – Don’t try to second guess a colleague or friend. Instead let the situation come to light and you will reveal the true reason for their out of character behaviour. Lucky sign – A shining star Aquarius – Neptune is passing retrograde with Jupiter opening up a wealth of opportunities for you Aquarians. Be alert and don’t let them slip past you, or you will have to wait until 2045 for the same chances. Lucky sign – A giant leap Pisces – Who said life was easy? Whoever did was lying! Lucky sign – God Aries – Keep a close eye on the weather forecast as that walking expedition you had in mind might be better at another time. If the skies are grey and the heavens open, you’d be better off indoors. Lucky sign – A golfing umbrella Taurus – You have failed to keep any of your New Years Resolutions, which is a mighty great shame. Make some new ones and stick to them this time. Lucky sign – A bag of oranges Gemini – It never rains, but it pours and that is what is going to happen in your world throughout February, I regret to say. Remember though, that every cloud has a silver lining. Lucky sign – Reverse

Cancer – Money worries rear their ugly head and they seem to be escalating into a full scale crisis. Try to replace these negative thoughts with more positive ones and watch the results in awe. Lucky sign – Sense Leo – Pull up the binds and let in the light to shine your life in the right direction. If you stay in feeling sorry for yourself, this will only add fuel to the fire. Lucky sign – A long stick Virgo – You have been contemplating buying a new pet to keep you company. Your best bet is a dog, the sausage variety. Lucky sign – Chips Libra – Parties galore are in store for you Librans this Feb. Could be the perfect opportunity to meet your Mr or Mrs Right and celebrate Valentines Day with a fresh love. Lucky sign – A full glass Scorpio – You are all set for that big move and you are looking forward to the success that lies ahead. Go for it! Lucky sign – A business partnership Sagittarius – A holiday would be a good move for you Sags as soon as humanely possible. You could really do with one in an unusual and exotic location. Lucky sign – A pile of bricks And if it´s your Birthday this month.... After the Lord Mayor´s Show eh?

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121

Top Ten Valentine's Day Love Songs based on Singtones' downloads for February (with first release date):

en s T ,10 p 9 o , T ,8 ,7 6 , 5

1. "Just The Way You Are" / Barry White 1978

Top Ten countries with the longest rail networks...

3. "Can't Take My Eyes Off You" / Andy Williams 1967

1. United States. 226,427 km

4. "Eternal Flame" / Bangles 1991

4, ,3,

1,2

2. Russia. 128,000 km 3. China. 86,000 km 4. India. 63,327 km 5. Canada. 57,216 km 6. Germany. 41,896 km 7. Australia. 38,550 km 8. Argentina. 35,897 km 9. France. 29,901 km

2. "Your Song" / Elton John 1970

5. "Hello" / Lionel Richie 1984 6. "Ain't No Sunshine" / Bill Withers 1971 7. "Bleeding Love” / Leona Lewis 2007 8. "My Boo" / Usher and Alicia Keys 2004 9. "Stand By Me" / Ben E. King 1961

10. Brazil. 29,817 km

10. "Close To You" / Carpenters 1970

It is with deepest regret to announce the passing away of George Kautz, fondly known as “German George”. George lived in Torre Del Mar and will be sadly missed by all his family and friends.

guess the nickname? (answer below)

get Quizical answers 1. Shark, 2. Tom, 3. Bird (Pigeon), 4. Warsaw, 5. French Foreign Legion, 6. Pacific, 7. Sasquatch, 8. Human populations, 9. Lizard, 10. Without hair, smooth, 11. Sermon writing or preaching, 12. Sitting. riddle Diddle answers 1. The keys to your house, 2. The letter v, 3. The man's old password was "out of date". His new password was "different". guess the Nickname: Richard Head!!!!!!... think about it.


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r e d a r T The

oto. t inc. ph r e v d a oxed th. 5€ for b th of the mon ll: 664 210 468 1 r o s d a 7 the 1 8 wor th or c um of 2 made before th of the mon im x a m e 5 1 b 3€ for a Payment to a.com before ll e n ti n ese ales@th Email s

Cars For Sale / Wanted LaNDrOVEr DisCOVErY 2 TD5. ES. 7 seats, 2001 fully loaded, power steering, double air con, cd, leather interior, etc... ITV April 2011. 8,500€ o.n.o. P/X possible. 649 111 965. BMw.320 sE. 4 door Saloon. Green. Petrol, 2002 U.K. plates. VGC. 4,500€ 649 079 321 FOrD MaVEriCk, Turbo diesel ´97, RHD, sunroof, trailer-clutch. English plates, 2,500€ Torrox, El Peñoncillo 27. Call: 630 364 356 ENDUrO BikE, Beta, 2006, 50cc, orange, VGC, many racing extras eg bore kit, leo vince exhaust, perfect campo bike. 700€. 636006598 BMw F650 gs Enduro motorcycle, 2005, 19,000km, new tyres, battery, sprockets & chain. Recent €1100 main BMW agent service. Perfect cond throughout. Saudi Arabian reg. €2600 Tel: 660 708 441 VOLkswagEN Passat diesel estate, 1995, UK reg, RHD. Very clean, drives well. €450 Tel: 660 708 441 LaNDrOVEr DisCOVErY 2.5tDi 1997, white, Sp. plates, lhd. Approx 208.000kms, 7 seats, e/w, a/c, towbar, side steps, good condition, 6,500€ o.n.o Call: 656 496 901 sUZUki rMx 50 trials bike. 1999, total engine rebuild, new tyres, lovely cond. Spanish reg. €550 Tel: 660 708 441 kawaski 450 dirt and road bike, 2009. Hardly used 800km on clock. 5,000€ o.n.o Call: 6000 rENaULt scenic 2002 – 1900cc, 117k km, hatchback, diesel, manual, ITV Apr 11, taxed, immaculate, ABS, alarm, Immobiliser, 4 airbags, cd/radio with steering control, c/locking, e/windows, e/mirrors 4,200€ Vinuela, 951239678 / 630393290

2001 hONDa CiViC 1.7i ES Vtec, 2 door, 125 HP. Great condition!

4,895€ Call John: 687 002 407

waNtED CLassiC MOtOrCYCLEs. Pre 1985, any condition, any plate, working or not. Cash paid. Tel. 615 855 479

Items For Sale sEt OF LaDiEs gOLF CLUBs plus bag. Set of gents clubs plus bag, 2 trolleys, 2 golf bags for half sets and a travel bag (for airlines). Other extras, buyer takes all 450€. Call 639 947 386 tOOLs gaLOrE Big ones/small ones, whatever takes your fancy. Mostly carpentry. Call: 618 721 660 OUtDOOr PiNg PONg taBLE, full size, completely weatherproof, folds away and is on wheels for easy storage, excellent condition. 95€ Tel: 650 958 144. PLaYstatiON 2 sLiM CONsOLE, 1 year old excellent cond. 14 games, guitar, steering wheel and pedals, memory card. Console box and manuel. 85€ o.n.o. Tel. 693 269 766 / 693 740 576 sOLar POwErED watEr hEatEr approx 200 lts tank. Un used. Ready to install. €500 Tel: 660 708 441 "BisONtE" wOODBUrNiNg stOVE with fan 56cm high, 59cm wide, 50cm depth. 395€ Tel: 630 364 356 ELECtrO trEatMENt & EPiLatiON machine only 160€. Torrox El Penoncillo 27. Call: 630 364 356

Properties For Sale/Rent tOrrEViEJa (ViLLa MartiN), 1 Bed apartment for sale. Sleeps 4, new UPVC windows with kitchen appliances on nice complex with pools. Sold as seen, £55,000 O.N.O. Call Mick on 0044 7770972725 email: thermawarm@aol.com or call Carmen 662 378 911 or email carmen.cienfuegos@hotmail.com for more information. www.holidayrentalinspain.com FOr saLE 1 BED aPartMENt on San Juan Capistrano, Nerja. Larger than average. Fully furnished. WAS 139,950 NOW 90,000€ Call: 6000 47435


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s e i t r e p Pro

rts ed adve x o b t u uire abo for enq of the month. r call: 664 € 5 1 r 17th ords o onth o of 28 w ade before the 15th of the m m u im x re ma be m befo 3€ for a Payment to ntinella.com se e sales@th Email:

Properties For Sale/Rent 2/3 BEDrOOM hOUsE tO LEt in Benamargosa. Available for long or short term lets from 300€ pcm. Also holiday lets from 200€ per week. 2 mins to supermarket, bars and swimming pool. Call: 636 117 210 tOwNhOUsE FOr saLE Charming townhouse in Riogordo. 3 bed, lounge with log burner, fitted kitchen/diner, terrace, parking. Reduced to €119,000. Tel 606 734 012 tOrrOx PUEBLO LargE tOwNhOUsE 150sqm and terrace. In need of rebuild with plans. Paperwork in order. Call: 95 252 5830 / 609 931 224 35,000€ o.n.o. tOrrEViEJa (ViLLa MartiN), 1 Bed apartment for rent. Sleeps 4, new UPVC windows with kitchen appliances on nice complex with pools. Sold as seen, £55,000 O.N.O. Call Mick on 0044 7770972725 email: thermawarm@aol.com or call Carmen on 662 378 911 or email: carmen.cienfuegos@hotmail.com for more information. www.holidayrentalinspain.com FOr rENt iN riOgOrDO Charming townhouse, 3 bed, fully furnished, kitchen/diner, lounge with log burner, Sat TV, telephone, terrace, parking, 2 mins to centre. €350 pcm Tel 606 734 012 a COsY 2 BED 2 bath town house in Viñuela village for rent. Fully furnished, fitted kitchen, sky tv, roof terrace. Suit single or couple. Pets welcome 350€ pcm. Call. 649 111 965. saYaLONga hOUsE for long term rental. Lovely house with one double bedroom, small sitting room, shower room and kitchen and terrace. 300€ pcm plus bills.Tl f. 605 598 959 MODErN 1 BED FUrNishED flat in Alcaucin. Magnificent views of Lake Vinuela and mountains. Internet connection. 200€ per month including eletric and water. Short rentals considered. Call Lee 659 324 586 FLat, 90M2, in Vélez-Málaga, new, 5 mins to schools, health centre, supermarket, bus station, highway and 5 km to the sea. 3 bedrooms, a prime quality furnished kitchen, 22m2 terrace, lift and garage. €159.000, tlf: 606 764 539.

Ready to move in.

Wanted CarEr rEQUirED for lady with MS. Must be over 5, 5", fit energetic full driving licence. please call -Sarah 952967114 Torrox Costa. House /Pet Sitters available. waNtED: ExPEriENCED riDEr to share 15.3hh gelding in the Alcaucin area. Good nature but needs someone with confidence. Small contribution. Tel 693 269 766 waNtED tO rENt, House in 20 Km vacinity of Velez Malaga. Rural/Coastal fenced, with garage or possible workshop space. Long Term Tel: 630 842 978 i wiLL COLLECt FrEE of charge all your used clothing, bric-a-brac, pots and pans, books, toys, CD´s garden pots, tools, pieces of furniture or anything else you are throwing out whilst you are cleaning. Call me on Tel:- 658 72 92 74 Jacqui waNtED LONg tErM hOUsE let/house sit in the Torrox/Nerja/Frigiliana area. Minimum 2 bedrooms. Must have telephone/internet, TV and garage or secure storage for working couple, non-smoking, courteous and trustworthy. Maximum €500 per month. References available on request. Tel: 0044 1908 604905 E-mail: sparkytwix@hotmail.co.uk wE arE JaN & arthUr BErrY, & have recently returned to the UK after living for 7 years in Caleta de Velez. We are experienced housesitters & are available to care for your home and/or animals (in your home) for short or long periods, in your absence. Arthur is a qualified plumber & DIY enthusiast, so you can rest assured that your home will be in good hands. Jan speaks Spanish fairly well, so between us, we can deal with any emergencies that may arise. We are available at most times of the year & our services are free of any charges. We still have many friends in Caleta & can provide excellent references. If you would like to discuss your requirements, please email your phone number to janlberry@hotmail.com & we will call you. Alternatively, you can call us on 0044 1702 351754


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nth!! s s e y os a mo .com r n r u i e o 5 s t st Bu Direc Business here fraoilm: sjuales@thesentinella r m list you 68 or E We can on 664 210 4 ay Call tod

ACCOMMODATION

BRITISH SUPERMARKETS

wEscuela la Crujia Rural B & B & guesthouse in a pretty converted school, 10 minutes from Velez Malaga,Tel: 606 010 580. Email: toni@escuelalacrujia.com

warkwrights English Shop. Turn right at Venta Baja Crossroads or call: 952 519 780 www.arkwrights-groceries.com

AIR CONDITIONING

BUILDERS

wFor air Conditioning call Esola, 616 119 007, Torre del Mar

wall types of building work undertaken, 37 years experience, Let me quote you. Call: 952 110 788 or 650 895 461 wreformers terence Mitchell - Renovations & Refurbishments. Professional builders with over 20 years experience. Tiling, painting, plumbing, electricity. Free advice, no obligations. Tel: 664 459 868. terryseatonreformas@hotmail.com www.facebook.com/terryseatonreformas wP&g Builders, 12 years in Spain. ALL work completed. Portfolio of work available. Ring Paul: 636 857 697 ViĂąuela areas. Email: chicken.paul@hotmail.com wJr Construction Extensions, Reforms, Tiling (Int & Ext), Terraces, Walls, Garages and Painting. Reliable, Quality Workmanship. For a quotation ring John: 699 261 414 or Richard. 636 857 715. C/Virgen de la Milagrosa NÂş 3, Los Romanes, 29713, Malaga. wPJM Construction. Professional builder experienced in all types of construction from routine maintenance to new builds. Happy to supply references from many satisfied customers. Call now for a no obligation quote 625 348 406 info@pjmilton.com

ARTS & CRAFTS w La Vaqueria, Hand made cards, craft materials, gifts, souvenirs, morrocan goods, paintings, mosaics, refreshments to eat in or take away, classes, workshops and much, much more! La Vaqueria, Benamargosa. Opening hours - Tues -Sat 10am-3pm, Closed Mondays Tel:- 952517273 E-mail: studio.20lavaqueria@hotmail.com Website: www.la_vaqueria.com http://www.myspace.com/lavaqueriabenamargosa

BLINDS wsolar blinds, ideal for large glazed areas to keep the view but also giving privacy and stopping maximum amounts of heat/glare and fading of furnishings. solarblinds.es@gmail.com Speak to Ian 644 54 61 76 958 49 65 71

BOOKSHOPS wPasatiempo Calle Infantes 32, Torre del Mar, 952 543 703, www.bookshoppasatiempo.com


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125

Business Listing CAR AND 4 x 4 PARTS wall Makes and Models Land Rover specialists, trade and public welcome. Nationwide delivery service. Call Tropical 4x4 on 650 581 570 / 951 707 785 www.tropical4x4.com

CAR AND VAN RENTAL wOne way van hire, UK, France and Spain. Call: 952 541 147

CARS WANTED wwanted all UK plated vehicles. Year 2000 onwards. cash paid. Call: 667 235 205

CARPENTERS wandrew rodgers 20 years experience in kitchens, wardrobes, shelving, aluminium door & windows. Call the Window Doctor for any window problem. Roller shutter blinds, mosquito blinds, security locks, repairs and renewals reasonable rates, Tel: 660 597 894 email: rodgersfamilyinspain@yahoo.co.uk

CARPET & UPHOLSTERY CLEANING wCarpet & Upholstery Cleaning. Professional Machines, 18 years experience. All areas covered. Call Roy on 958 640 068 or 656 561 669.

CHIROPODISTS wregistered Chiropodist/Podiatrist offering a complete footcare service in the comfort of your own home. 15yrs experience NHS & private. Call: 636 866 715 wregistered Chiropodist/Nurse of 20 years. New in Velez Malaga. Offers the following services:- Foot and hand care (diabetic, veruccas, fungus nails, ingrown toenails). Also home visits. Post hospital aftercare including physio. Call Teresa: 695 243 238

CHIROPRACTIC CARE

wComputer help.Troubleshooting & Repairs. New PCs supplied with Windows in English. WiFi installations. Reasonable rates. Microsoft Certified Systems Engineer since 2000. Patient & professional. Call David on 952 54 96 07 or 654 899 976. wComputer Problems? Help is at hand. Upgrades, repairs, hardware and software problems solved, NO FIX - NO FEE. Advice on buying and setting up the right computer for you. Tuition from complete beginners to advanced, get the most out of your PC. Call David Fleck on: 952 510 729 / 620 328 382 or email: david@technophobe.es www.technophobe.es

DENTISTRY wClinica Europa Centro internacional, Blq. 86, Torrox Costa. Call: 952 53 09 08 Email: clinicaeuropatorroxcosta@gmail.com British dentist, 24hrs response Call: 648 203 157 wian Pett Dental Care, Five star dental care you can trust. Edif. Al-zabel, Local 7, Cruce de Periana, 29713 Alcaucin, Puente don Manuel. 951 139 287 / 691 700 587 UK +44 1708 616 148. www.ianpettdentalcare.com

DOG GROOMING wthe Dog shop, Professional grooming salon. All dogs welcome, any size, any breed. Tel: 645 525 782, Centro Comercial, 10, Torrox Park. www.thedogshoptorrox.com

ELECTRICIANS wElectro-Cute! English J.I.B. Electrician. For all your electrical needs and problems. Fault finding/Lighting and power/Air conditioning Electric gates and Intercoms/Pumps, Rewires/Upgrades Call Stefan 610 048 919 electrocutester@gmail.com wElectrician - Lakeside Property services, 24 hour call out emergency Electrician and Plumber. Call David on: 627 931 357

ELECTRONIC CIGARETTES

wPhilippe Druart D.C., grad. from AECC (GB) and USA, 30 years exp., opens a chiropractic clinic in Frigiliana, C/ Blas Infante, 2 bajo. Consultations: Monday from 16.30 to 20.30, Wednesday and Friday from 10.00 to 14.00 and by appointment. Tel. 951 708 672 & 678 691 387. Email: druphil@yahoo.fr

wElectronic Cigarettes attENtiON sMOkErs! Don't get left out in the cold when Spain goes non-smoking in January. The Regal e-cig is a realistic smoking experience. Monthly supply of cartridges available contact http://www.costadelsolecigs.myinlife.com

COMPUTERS

ESTATE AGENTS/REAL ESTATE

wPCtorrox.com.All computer problems solved. Torrox/Nerja and surrounding areas. Free Advice. No Fix No Fee. Hardware, Software and Website solutions. PC service - only 50 Euros. Call Rab on: 952 967 124 or 645 236 259.

wab ax Properties Colinias del Puerto 124, Avenida de Andalucia, Caleta de Velez, 952 511 103, www.abaxproperties.com


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Please mention The Sentinella when responding to adverts

Business Listing ESTATE AGENTS/REAL ESTATE (CONTINUED) wFleming Properties, Calle Las Melosas, Edf Nautico, Torre del Mar, 952 547 131 or 637 278 306, www.fleming-properties.com waxarquia Properties s.L Call; 626 038 851 www.axarquiaproperties.com Email: sallyharrison@axarquiaproperties.com wBuy a home spain/rent a home spain, Avenida Andalucia, 135, Torre del Mar. Call: 952 547 554 or 680 210 414. Email: info@rentahomespain.com Website: www.rentahomespain.com

FREIGHT & ONLINE SHOPPING DELIVERIES wFormula Freight, Call us for all your UK to Spain delivery requirements right to your door, to the Costa Tropical. Call: 01296 770029 Email; ian@formula-europe.co.uk www.formula freighteurope.co.uk

wweight Control - Herbalife Independent Distributor, Bea Savory, 95 253 4795 beasav@terra.es (business opportunity also available): wweight watchers Meetings in English. Nerja and Vélez. Call Candace on 952 549 607 or 626 672 493 for further info. candace.edwards@weightwatchers.es wVie at home Cosmetics, Skincare and Homewares. New Spring Catalogue out now. Pamper yourself and have a Cosmetics Party in your home, great Hostess gifts. Consultants wanted to join my Team teri.cosapreciosa@gmail.com Tel: 662 466 249

HOLIDAY LETS wVillas to Let Privately owned luxury villas to let. Contact Christine: 627 820 669 www.villaslet.com 958 36 40 16

HOLIDAY RENTALS

wFuneral services call: 952 977 000 / 638 339 691

w"Peace of Mind holiday rentals" Have you had a successful 2010 season? A) Yes, well done and long may it continue. B) No, then contact us to help kick-start your 2011 season. 20+ Sales and Marketing Experience. David Cullimore 686 375 089 cullimores@hotmail.com

FURNITURE

HORSE RIDING

wLargest range of furniture on the Costas. Guaranteed lowest prices. Quality furniture from the UK. WWW.nerjasofas.es

walcaucín horse riding, Lessons, trekking kids club on Sats 10am - midday. Ring Charlotte for more info. 620 609 374. Website: www.horseshoeranchspain.webs.com wandalucia horse riding 1hr, 2hr or day rides with picnic or bar lunch. Situated close to Lake Vinuela. Also riding Holidays with accommodation. Tel: 616 032 215 E-mail andaluciahorseriding@gmail.com Facebook – Andalucía Horseriding

FUNERAL SERVICES

FURNITURE SHOPS wCudeca Second Hand Furniture Shop, tel 952 545 212 Calle Infantes 48, Torre del Mar (by Thursday market) open from Monday to Friday 10.00 to 13.30 and 17.30 to 19.30. Saturdays 10.00 to 13.30 only. If you wish to donate furniture please call Melanie on 638 108 564.

GARDENING SERVICES wred Palm Beetles, Wasps, Ants, Woodlice, Mice, Rats and all pests. Processionary Moths. Call us for treatment and disposal of these garden problems. Tel: 657 165 373

GREETINGS CARDS wrosemary george tarjetas. For all occasions, English & Spanish. Organic, Handmade & much more. Supplying to shops, bars, clubs & individuals. Email: sales@greetingscardsinspain.com Telephone: 679 982 992

HEALTH & BEAUTY

HOTELS whotel Balcon de Competa, C/San Antonio, 75 Competa. Tel: 952 55 36 62 / Fax: 952 51 67 80 www.hotel-competa.com Email: info@hotel-competa.com

HOUSE CLEARANCES wCarousel second hand Furniture, Vinuela Pueblo (Under Cajamar Bank), access via steps at side of bank, or slip road behind bank, 630 211 907

INSURANCE wLCJ iNsUraNCE, Not the cheapest, Not the dearest, Almost certainly the best, *Health Insurance, * Travel Insurance - Multi trips, *Car and House Insurance, * Funeral Plans, Call: 952 515 224


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127

Business Listing INTERNET SERVICES

MACHINE HIRE

wriosat:sL, No landline required. High speed Internet and telephone services. Some areas free installation. Prices starting from as low as 20 euros per month. Call: 951 239 310 / 626 679 018. Email: info@riosat.com Web: http// www.riosat.com

wMachines for hire, for all your building & reform requirements, with or without driver. Call: 696 547 646, on road to lake. wsaxon sL JCB Digger Hire. New machine Good rates. Velez Malaga Call: 678 23 22 53 or 662 39 83 72

INTERPRETERS

MAINTENANCE

wspanish woman can help you and you can practice your Spanish with her. Torrox, El Peñoncillo 27, Call: 630 364 356

wMaintenance person experienced in plumbing, tiling, painting and general maintenance of buildings. Portfolio of previous work carried out available. Friendly, reliable and reasonable rates. No job to small. Los Romanes and surrounding area. Tel: 618 496 266 or email: vramsell@aol.com.

KENNELS AND CATTERY wwagtails boarding kennels for cats and dogs. Dogs walked 3 times a day in 36,000 sq metres fenced land. Phone Val 655 579 792 or Richard 645 659 935 or www.wagtails.es wthe Dog house While you are away on holiday or a weekend break, your dogs live in our house alongside our dog. Large play area, lots of country walks. Pet collection/del. service. Vet services on call. Gourmet meals if required. 'Only the best for your pal'. Ring: Phil 649 079 321 Comares/Benamargosa. Email:philipclayton_1@msn.com Ex cat & dog airlines.UK. Recommended. Refs available. whome From home Dog Boarding at my 10,000m2 finca in Riogordo. No kennels just lots of excercise, fun and cuddles. Call: 678 189 019 or e-mail: riogordo@mail.com www.homefromhome.weebly.com. Also within 15km daily home visits for dogs, cats, horses. wDog care in our home with us, food, warmth, exercise and affection. Fully netted secure areas. Diet and meds. Ex UK dogs home worker also voluntary work. Call: 669 346 268, Casabermeja. On A45 midway between Antequera and malaga

LAWYERS wCarmen silvia, Solicitors Abogados, Spanish solicitors, English Spoken, Torrox Costa, Urb. Costa del Oro local 8, (very near Nota-ria Office). Free initial consultation, 952 967 004 Email: carmensilvia@telefonica.net winternational Law solutions. English speaking Spanish Lawyer. English and Spanish legal advisors. Urb Torrox Park, zona Comercial 3, tel/fax: 952 527 831 or 615 338 075, Email: info.ils@hotmail.com

LOCKSMITHS wBritish Locksmith - 24 hour service, good rates. Tel: 676 262 073

MARKET GOODS wMr Clutter Wants your Goods, House and garage clearances, shops and bars - old stock, any item considered. Call David: 686 375 089 - or if preferred email a list to cullimores@hotmail.com. Cash available and efficient service, Now buying Antiques,Gold & Jewellery

MEDICAL CENTRES wDr. Bernadette Veeger General Medicine 952 532 065, 617 913 196. Consultations by appointment and house visits. English, Español, Deutsch, Francais, Nederlands. Centro Mar y Salud, Paseo Marítimo, El Morche/Torrox Costa, www.centromarysalud.com

MOBILE MECHANIC wMobile Mechanic, call Terry: 951 239 660, or 659 483 561. Based in Alcaucin, 30+ years experience, all work fully guaranteed, 15€ per hour. Discount parts supplied. Covers whole of Axarquia, coastal and inland. I come to you!

MOBILITY PRODUCTS wBlue Badge Mobility.s.L Hire & Sales of Mobility Scooters, Wheelchairs, Bathroom aids, Toilet Aids, Stair Lifts, Long term rentals, Best prices on the Costa. Quality Service. Contact Gary Or Sara 952967015 / 635445279 www.bluebadgemobility.com

MOTHER & TODDLER GROUPS wMother & toddler group at Torre Montessori Nursery in Torre del Mar on Wednesdays from 10:30 to 12:30 - 4€. TL: 633 637 774 Email: torremontessori@gmail.com Address: Calle Laureano Casquero s/n Torre del Mar


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Business Listing NURSERIES

PHYSIOTHERAPY

wguarderia/Nursery torre Montessori, an English nursery with Spanish as second language. High adult/child ratios. Open Monday to Friday. Full and Part Time places available. TL: 633 637 774 Email: torremontessori@gmail.com address: Calle Laureano Casquero s/n Torre del Mar

wsanne h. Mortensen, BSc (Hons), MCSP, SRP, Spanish registered, Col no 2066. Clinic appointments or home visits in the Axarqùia region. Experienced UK trained physiotherapist offering post-operative rehabilitation and general musculo-skeletal conditions. 626 152 756

ONLINE SHOPPING wOnline shopping WWW.COOLTIENDA.EU Local online shopping in Spain - FREE P&P. HEALTHY BACK BAGS - Looks Good & Feels Good. The patented Healthy back bag, contours to the shape of your spine, becoming part of you & hence feeling lighter. COOL BANDANAS - Personal cooling products to beat the heat. TILLEY HATS - Made in Canada, UPF50 maximum sun protection, water resistant, Guaranteed for life. COOL DUDE'S Products, now available to buy online. Chillows, Laptop Coolers & more! WWW.COOLTIENDA.EU

OPTICIANS wheiko stumbeck, Avda Andalucia 119, Torre del Mar, 952 967 923 and C/Antonio Ferrandiz "Chanquete" 23-25, Nerja, 952 528 395. C/Jacinto, Benavente Edf. No. 6, Fuengirola, 952 197 565

OUTSIDE CATERERS wPig n Mix hog roast available for all occasions.Machine rental only or we cater for you. For prices www.pig-n-mix.com / email: info@pig-n-mix.com or Tel 655137483

PAINTERS wraC Decorators & tilers. All aspects of Painting and Tiling undertaken, Interior & Exterior Tel: 638-489-711 racdecor@ymail.com wPainting, villas, walls etc. Rejas a speciality. For free quote ring Nick in Vinuela on 676 491811.

PET COURIERS wPet taxi- UK, France & Spain Delivered door to door. Call: 667 235 205

PET TREATS w4 Paws Barkery. The very best handmade, wholesome and pure Gourmet Dog Treats. Made locally from 100% human quality ingredients. No added preservatives or artificial colours. www.4pawsbarkery.eu

PLUMBERS wwayne’s Drains & Plumbing Est.1999. 24 Hour call out. Tel/Fax: 952 539 425. 24 Hour Service: 634 275 030 wJohn Folland Plumbing & heating: All jobs from a dripping tap to fully fitted kitchens/bathrooms. No call out charge. Tel John: 622 050 803 or 622 180 606 wJust Plumbing. Just a quick and reliable plumbing service. Just a reasonably priced local business. Just polite, prompt and tidy. Just phone Dave on 689 647 849. Discounts in Riogordo, Colmenar, Comares.

PRINTING SERVICES wBusiness Cards double sided from 135€ for 500. Flyers double sided full colour from 150€ for 1,000. Call: 664 210 468 wBenaware Print. Competitive prices for single and double sided flyers. Personalised T shirts and greetings cards. Phone 608 631 603 or 952 517 464. E-Mail russ.benaware@gmail.com

PROPERTY & POOL CARE wExperienced, professional and reliable all year service. Caring for your Property, Pool and People. References available on request. Call Ron: 637 995 088, ppp247@hotmail.co.uk www.pppaxarquia.com

PROPERTY RENTALS wBuy a home spain/rent a home spain, Avenida Andalucia, 135, Torre del Mar. Call: 952 547 554 or 680 210 414. Email: info@rentahomespain.com Website: www.rentahomespain.com wProperties – call Pauline 619 58 9696 for your rental requirements in the Viñuela, Periana and Alcaucin areas. We also offer architectural services and surveys and have a number of reasonably prices houses for sale. www.andalusiproperties.com andalucian rental services The Complete Service for Holiday Rentals, Long Term Lets, Changeovers and Pool Cleaning. Covering Benamargosa, Colmenar, Comares and Riogordo. www.andalucianrentalservices.com info@andalucianrentalservices.com Tel: 662 466 249


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129

Business Listing REMOVALS w2Js removals Ltd, House Clearances, UKSpain-UK, Local and International removals, Reliable service, free quotes, no job too small. Fully insured. Call: June or John 649 662 012 / 618 846 868 Email: jmcc1957@yahoo.co.uk warnold removals Local & International. Great service, fair price. Tel: 685 360 193 www.arnoldremovals.es Call. 626 160 869 info@arnoldremovals.es wUK-Spain-UK removals. Complete van loads or just 1 item. We are in the UK every 2 weeks. Pay for just 1 way. Nerja Sofas 608091660 or 951247240 nerjasofas@hotmail.com

RESTAURANTS wtaj Mahal ( Torre del Mar ) Avda. Anadalucia, Blq. Jupiter, Pasaje Timon 2, C/Timon. Tel: 952 547 798 wtaj Mahal (Puente don Manuel) Next door to Chiringuito Antonios, Venta Baja Tel: 952 510 886 or 667 934 731 w restaurant Caribe, Bloque 7, Local 13, Costa del Oro, Torrox Costa. Tlf: 952 530 831

SATELLITE T.V. wtotal satellite installations Call Phil on: 629 556 266. Email:philbraid@hotmail.com wsky shop torre del Mar. Call: 667 235 205 or 952 541 147 wsat. Co. Freesat HD & Sky Digital, dishes, alignments, installations. We also sell HD TVs. Call TOM 7 days a week for service. 657 484 853. All equipment delivered, installed & guaranteed for 2 years. Free demos every Sat. 2pm

SIGN MAKERS wredhouse signmakers. We specialise in the design and making of all types of signs - shops, pavement boards, estate agency for sale boards and more. Call us on Tel: 628 594 387 or Email: redhousesigns@yahoo.co.uk, Website: www.redhousesigns.com

SOLICITORS wC&D solicitors Specialists in Real Estate, Civil and Tax Law. Tel: 952 532 582 www.cdsolicitors.net or email:info@cdsolicitors.net

SPAS & SAUNAS wtime Out spas & saunas. Serving The Costa del Sol for more than 10 Years. Hundreds of Spas Installed! We service all Brands

of Spas so come to us - we are the Professionals. 952 52 43 94 www.timeoutspas.com

TYRES wCar, 4x4 and motorcycle tyres supplied and fitted. Punctures repaired, wheel balancing, competitive prices. Also ITV (Mot) welding. For a no obligation quote call: 676 719 066 / 620 627 214 or 952 517 502. Email: sainbena@hotmail.com Also iron work made to order.

WEB DESIGNERS wspanglish webs, Web designs, Database Programmes, Hosting, Domains, Real Estate Sites, English – Spanish Translation. All at realistic prices. Call Rachel: 951 708 454 or 691 660 187 Website: www.spanglishwebs.com Email: info@spanglishwebs.com wsokrak web Design, Quality web design at the lowest price! Get an eye catching, easy to navigate website in English, Spanish and more, to make your business available worldwide. All our prices are affordable and include hosting and your domain for the first year with no hidden fees. For more information, visit www.sokrakwebdesign.com or contact us on (+34) 666 731 759

WELLS wwater well: drilling for water supply and irrigation Plumbing and electrical installation, legalisation, water works construction/repairing. Call us: 666 13 88 86, or e-mail: plumbingwell@gmail.com free consultation.

WINDOW FITTER w window fitter and repaires 26 years ex. ring Mick on 0044 7770972725

WINDOW TINTING w Mobile service itv legal Solar reflective tint for glass curtains, balconies, yachts stop fading, heat ,glare, save money on cooling make living in the sun comfortable. 958 496 571-644 546 176 solarshadetinting@gmail.com

Bu sin e ss L istin g R a te s: 12 months - 60 euros 6 months - 40 euros 3 months - 30 euros

C a l l : 6 6 4 210 46 8 sales@thesentinella.com


Have your Installation in February



FP0411 A reformed three bedroom finca of some 140m2 on a 1500m2 plot with pool enjoying sea views and minutes to the motorway. Mortgage available CAJiZ

285,000€ Caleta de Velez

FP0712

2 A pristine three Canillas de aceituno A modern 84m , bedroom two bedroom apartment with townhouse of country views on 168m2 in total the edge of this with large private popular village, garage, secure easy walking communal gardens distance to and pool. Two amenities and minutes walk to 275,000€ beach and marina FP0731 Only 70,000€ community pool

Nerja

FP0727

A beautiful one bedroom apartment in Capistrano with private terrace and garden. This is a great property for sale at a very 100,000€ reasonable price

Long term rental - Baviera

650€ Per month

A spacious, three bedroom townhouse overlooking the 8th green of the golf course and only two minutes drive to the beach. Rear terrace garden and huge basement garage

tOrrE OFFiCE Calle Playa Marina, 2D Torre del Mar. 29740 Tel: 952 54 71 31 Mob: 606 087 362 NErJa OFFiCE Calle El Barrio, 11 Nerja. 29780 Tel: 952 52 41 40 Mob: 637 278 306


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