The Sentinella Axarquia January 09

The Sentinella Axarquia Edition!

N o 5 3 Al l y o u n e e d f o r ‘ i n f o o n th e g o ’

J a nu a ry 0 9

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From the Ed..

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Happy New Year everybody and welcome to 2009 and the prospect of 12 new editions of The Sentinella Axarquia to read in the year ahead.

We have SO much new fun stuff in store for you, which will make you guffaw like never before. Forget picking up the daily rags, or tuning into the TV news – unless of course you get enjoyment out of hearing about the latest child abduction, the rate of unemployment in the UK, or a sordid politician love affair. Yawn!

We at The Sentinella believe in the feel good factor and we try hard each and every month to deliver that to you to dip in and out of when you please. What’s life all about if you can’t let your hair down and enjoy a slice of humour from time to time? Besides, laughing is good for you. Did you know that a good chuckle can kill off illness? It also makes you shine, helps you look younger and all sorts of other beauties. So in 2009 make that your New Year Resolution – to indulge in The Sentinella magazine or other funny pastimes for at least 30 minutes a day.

For those who are housebound, hermits, or just plain lazy you don’t even have to venture outside to pick up a copy anymore. You can read each and every edition online by logging on to our website www.thesentinella.com, selecting which region’s mag you want to flick through by going to ‘choose your edition’ on the right of the screen and then clicking on ‘read the latest edition’. The pages even open like the real life magazine – the technology these days, eh?!

Not only that but also you can email us on info@thesentinella.com to register for your free monthly newsletter – a little

A Taste of What’’s Inside This Month

New Year Resolutions.....Page 6 Cocktails........................Page 20 Network Update.............Page 23 Top Tens........................ page 24 Share’oscope................Page 25 Amazing Animals..........Page 38 Random Jokes..............Page 46 Christmas Story.............Page 75 Special Recipe...............Page 82 Trade Page.....................Page 96 Private Sale Section .... Page 97 Star Signs....................Page 107 CONTACT THE EDITOR PHONE: 664 210 468 EMAIL: sales@thesentinella.com Deposito Legal MA-1435-2005

No part of this publication, including pictures may be copied, used or reproduced without our prior written consent. The Sentinella accepts no responsibility for alterations to events listed, claims made by our advertisers or information provided by our contributors. So there!

The Sentinella is eternally dedicated to Colin Checkley, the founder and editor of The Sentinel Magazine.

May he rest in peace.

(Born; 1960 Died; 2004)

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extra for real fans of The Sentinella, as a thank you for being such sterling supporters during the last four years. It will include new info, direct link to latest edition of the mag, link to my personal blog, special offers, promotions, features, images and lots more. You’d be mad to miss it – so send your full name to info@thesentinella.com to make sure you’re on our all important email list.

The Sentinella magazine is also extending its list of services – we now print leaflets and business cards, plus design websites. So make your company bigger and better in 2009 and get with the times by going online. You know it makes sense Rodney, or is that Dave?!

On a final note, in last six months or so I’ve learnt that The Sentinella isn’t only fab reading matter. In fact the uses of The Sentinella extend far further than that. Here’s just a small list of other usages some readers have invented.

1. Fly squatter (mosquito to be specific) 2. Car window cleaner (when it’s a bit grubby in times of emergency) 3. Table leg balancer (wobbly tables do seem more commonplace here in Spain do they not?!)

I won’t mention them all, as there are clearly some rather queer sorts amongst us, who seemingly live in a different universe!

Have a happy and prosperous ‘09 and if you can’t be good…be even naughtier!

Keidi Keating x

Editor (of the original little mag)!

Strange News

Hair One Minute Gone The Next

A Chinese woman who had not cut her hair for ten years called police to report 4 To advertise call

that it had been stolen.

Xiao Hong, 30, of Siping, says someone cut off her 4ft plait as she walked out of a shopping mall.

She said "People were squeezing together out the door, and when I stepped out I felt I lost something. I subconsciously touched my hair, but it was gone."

In the past she had been offered the equivalent of £300 for her hair but had refused to sell it.

Pooping Obama is best-seller

Tiny plastic figures of Barack Obama and Gordon Brown relieving themselves in public have become online bestsellers.

They are among a host of politicians, sports stars and celebrities to be given the dubious honour of being turned into a 'caganer'.

Catalonians traditionally celebrate Christmas by placing a caganer, which translates as pooper, in a nativity scene.

People find it fun to try to spot the tiny defecating figures which are supposed to bring prosperity and a good harvest.

Clock This…

A 35ft high Big Ben clock tower made entirely of chocolate has been crafted by Italian sweet-makers.

The scale model of St Stephen's Tower was sculpted from 17,600lbs of chocolate by artist Angelo Feduzzi for a food festival in Macerata Feltria, central Italy.

Festival organisers said that, with daytime temperatures at no more than 3C, the tower was in no danger of melting.

They left it standing for one week before slicing it up and handing it out to the public.

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How Right They Are

1) Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.

2) A fine is a tax for doing wrong. A tax is a fine for doing well.

3) He, who laughs last, thinks slowest.

4) A day without sunshine is like. . . well, night.

5) Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.

6) Those who live by the sword get shot by those who don't.

7) Nothing is fool proof to a sufficiently talented fool.

8) The 50-50-90 rule: Anytime you have a 50-50 chance of getting something

right, there's a 90% probability you'll get it wrong.

9) It is said that if you line up all the cars in the world end-to-end, some taxi would be stupid enough to try to pass them.

10) If the shoe fits, get another one just like it.

11) The things that come to those who wait, may be the things left by those who got there first.

12) Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach a man to fish and he will sit in a boat all day drinking beer.

13) When you go into court, you are putting yourself in the hands of twelve people who weren't smart enough to get out of jury duty!

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New Year Quotes

The New Year may be a significant event for many people. But the absurdities of the celebration cannot escape a skeptic's mind. Here are some funny New Year quotes.

Youth is when you're allowed to stay up late on New Year's Eve. Middle age is when you're forced to.

Bill Vaughan

The proper behaviour all through the holiday season is to be drunk. This drunkenness culminates on New Year's Eve, when you get so drunk you kiss the person you're married to.

P. J. O'Rourke

Making resolutions is a cleansing ritual of self assessment and repentance that demands personal honesty and, ultimately, reinforces humility. Breaking them is part of the cycle.

Eric Zorn An optimist stays up until midnight to see the New Year in. A pessimist stays up to make sure the old year leaves.

Bill Vaughan

New Year's Day is every man's birthday.

Charles Lamb

Cheers to a New Year and another chance for us to get it right.

Oprah Winfrey Many people look forward to the New Year for a new start on old habits.

Anonymous

May all your troubles last as long as your New Year's resolutions!

Joey Adams Good resolutions are simply checks that men draw on a bank where they have no account.

Oscar Wilde

I'm a little bit older, a little bit wiser, a little bit rounder, but still none the wiser.

6 To advertise call

Tony Knight

(The Sentinella)!!

A New Year's resolution is something that goes in one Year and out the other.

Anonymous

The object of a New Year is not that we should have a new year. It is that we should have a new soul and a new nose; new feet, a new backbone, new ears, and new eyes. Unless a particular man made New Year resolutions, he would make no resolutions. Unless a man starts afresh about things, he will certainly do nothing effective. Unless a man starts on the strange assumption that he has never existed before, it is quite certain that he will never exist afterwards.

Unless a man be born again, he shall by no means enter into the Kingdom of Heaven.

G. K. Chesterton

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To advertise in The Sentinella call 664 210 468 or email sales@thesentinella.com The Enigmatic Mr Phelps

Book Review

By David B. Green (Author)

Dining with people whom you would much rather avoid is difficult. It is even more difficult when the guests are Hillary and Enrique. Enrique said little, when Oscar most wanted to know the reasons for his current tenure in Nerja. While Hillary couldn’t stop talking. Though she said little of any real import. She was still as sexy as hell though, Oscar noted.

Francesca Luciani was the common denominator, on her disappearance; Oscar could cast no new light. There existed a Quandary! At 10.45pm Oscar did his best to reassure Hillary and said that they should sleep on it.

Hillary, just for a moment, reflected “Who With?”

Oscar bid “Hasta Mañana” to his guests and joined a waiting “Jośe” at the Rotunda Bar. Oscar Phelps was usually the indefatigable host. He exuded characteristics of the suave and cynical, whilst obviously highly sophisticated and infinitely debonair. He was a combination of consummate villain, and unmitigated blackguard. His appeal was indisputable.

At Midnight, Oscar and “Jośe” went for a drive in the Jaguar.

Their destination. “Marina Del Este”.

As the Jaguar silently rounded, almost caressing the final curve, Oscar slowed, in preparation for the careful negotiation of the ultimate “sleeping policemen” on the approach to the gatehouse at Marina

Del Este.

“José” was seated uncomfortably in the harsh leather passenger seat; he was small, diminutive, out of place, looking nervously, sheepishly, through his nearside window. He toyed with the rosary on his lap; this gave way to playing anxiously with the clip of his seatbelt, which appeared a technology too far. It held him like a child’s doll, without security, good grace or strength. Oscar glanced to his left, down at “José”. Oscar smiled.

“José” attempted to reciprocate in his suffocating silence. It didn’t happen.

Sweat gathered moist on his top lip.

As the car topped a “sleeping policeman”, the landing caused “José’s” beret to dislodge, falling into the foot-well. He lurched forward in attempted retrieval, slipping and fighting with anxiety through the confines of the restraining strap.

Oscar reached over and down with his left arm, not distracting from his vision of the road, he gathered the beret and offered it back to “José”.

Embarrassed, “José” gestured hesitantly, a “Gracias”. He folded the beret and clutched it to his heart.

It was as if his very life depended on it!

“Jośe” was a man of faith.

Oscar pulled hard, sweeping an acute right into the graveled public car park.

The surface crackled and crunched beneath the wide rimmed tires as the vehicle, drew to a solemn halt. Oscar engaged neutral and turned off the ignition. “José” looked out at the expanse of the Car Park. He could see far into the distance and beyond, toward the sea.

The car park was well lit by a series of elegant lanterns, in the distance near the sign for “Club Tenis” was a chiringuito.

The tall masts of a moored sailing ship protruded from beyond the trees. The passenger door opened, Oscar his companion and chauffer, beckoned him to exit the Jaguar. He didn’t consciously remember the unbuckling of his seatbelt but he was fully cognoscente of relief, of the release from confinement, as he stepped away from the Jaguar.

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Book Review Cont...

As Oscar maneuvered the cruiser through the appropriate channels, skirting the expensive millionaire’s labyrinth of moored vessels, “José” was positioned at the very rear of the craft, next to the cabinet, which stored flares, lifevests and safety accoutrements. He could see above him a steep vertical cliff.

Oscar, his back to “José”, steered hard, away and straight out into the open Mediterranean, accompanied by the candescence of the high moonlit night.

The water rippled alongside as the craft made its passage. “José” was conscious of Oscar, he admired him as he was obviously wrestling and busied in the stewardship of his vessel. Making adjustments, depressing levers, mastering the controls. “José” grew excited; it was a kind of revelry. More relaxed now.

He was enjoying the ride.

The long barrier wall and lights of the Marina grew ever distant and as the cruiser banked hard to the left, the coastal lights and familiar landmarks came flickering into view. To the rear was the Punta de la Mona, the coastal features signaled what “José” knew would be the Playa de Cotobro, Oscar accelerated into the direction of what would soon be Almuñecar and the Peñon del Santo. Oscar’s TAG said ten after one.

As the towering Moorish castle came into view at Almuñecar, “José” became conscious of the fact that the craft had begun a rapid deceleration. The coast was now taken by the Playa de San Cristobal. “José” could see quite clearly the legend and luminescence of the Restaurante Botos and to its immediate right, the Hotel Helios, which skirt either side of the Paseo de la China.

Oscar, his back still facing “José” ap8

peared to be engaged in the difficult maneuver of the cruiser as it passed gently through and around the heavy swell of the pennon de afuera, a headland which secreted cavern like structures, almost catacombs and beyond which lay a small unspoiled area of seclusion. Oscar reversed the engines with a strong unexpected thrust. The force of which jolted “José” forward, harshly, onto his knees, his rosary and beret became detached.

“Jose” felt the excruciating pain of his palms as they scratched, blistered and tore, burning along the metallic deck, this was quickly overcome however by a debilitating numbness as an object of extreme violence and force came down heavily on top of his head, bringing a very real sense of relief.

There was no time for surprise! All was Dark. Silence prevailed.

With Luck! The combination of swell and hideously distorted rock structure and formation would conceal the brown tarpaulin and its content, for a significant time.

It was fitting that the peñon de afuera lay in the shadow of the Castle. It was indeed appropriate. An apt tribute to the “amigo” in the red beret, who was now at peace.

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Funny Thoughts

Everybody lies, but it doesn't matter since nobody listens.

I wished the buck stopped here, as I could use a few.

I started out with nothing, and I still have most of it.

When you go into court you are putting yourself in the hands of 12 people that weren't smart enough to get out of jury duty.

Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.

When sign makers go on strike, is anything written on their picket signs?

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When you open a new bag of cotton balls, is the top one meant to be thrown away?

When your pet bird sees you reading the newspaper, does he wonder Why you're just sitting there, staring at carpeting?

Where do forest rangers go to "get away from it all"?

Why is it that when you're driving and looking for an address, you turn down the volume on the radio?

If you have your finger touching the rearview mirror that says -- "objects in mirror are closer than they appear", how can that be possible?

Why is it so hard to remember how to spell MNEMONIC? If someone invented instant water, what would they mix it with?

Why is it called a TV "set" when you only get one?

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Useless Facts

More of those useless facts for you to impress your friends and family with this New Year !

1) The world population is increasing by 6 million people a month.

2) The phrase ‘rule of thumb’ is derived from old English law which stated that you can’t beat your wife with anything wider than your thumb.

3) The longest recorded flight of a chicken is 13 seconds.

4) The word “Samba” means to rub navels together.

5) A lump of pure gold the size of a matchbox can be flattened into a sheet the size of a tennis court.

6) Your body is creating and killing 15 million red blood cells per second.

7) There are 18 different animal shapes in the Animal Crackers cookie zoo.

8) Tourists visiting Iceland should know that tipping at a restaurant is considered an insult.

9) It takes glass one million years to decompose, which means it never wears out and can be recycled an infinite number of times.

10

10) The Titantic was the first ship to use the SOS signal

11) Your left lung is smaller than your right to make way for your heart.

12) The oldest known goldfish lived to 41 years of age. Its name was Fred.

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Restaurante

BRAVO

Wonder ful Seaviews

*Fresh Tapas *Paellas *Beautiful Danish Pastries *Pancakes Classical Spanish Guitar Music by young musicians For reser vations call Maria or Niels on: 952 55 00 83 HAPPY NEW YEAR TO ALL OUR CUSTOMERS!

Urb. Pueblo Nuevo, Edf. Montevideo, Algar robo Costa

BIKES, BIKES AND MORE BIKES! We are delighted to announce the addition of bikes to our hire stock BOOK EARLY TO AVOID DISAPPOINTMENT. We welcome you to inspect, select & collect from our NEW SHOWROOM at LAKE VINUELA BUT PLEASE PHONE BEFOREHAND TO ARRANGE AN APPOINTMENT AS WE ARE OFTEN OUT DELIVERING. WE ARE SITUATED AT KM29 (ON RIGHT) OFF A356 1KM PAST CAMPING & PANTANO RESTAURANT. WE ARE SIGNPOSTED FROM THERE. F R E E P L AY M AT O R T OY F OR T HE D U R AT I O N OF T HE H I R E .

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NR PERIANA - NPH2464 146,000€ This spanish village house is situated in a small hamlet close to village. Comprises of lounge with woodburner, fitted kitchen, sep. toilet, three bedrooms and bathroom.

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RIO GORDO - NPH2463 175,000€ This lovely restored finca situated with good access, consists of fitted kitchen, lounge/dining room, two bedrooms and shower room. Outside terrace, garden and detached garage. Plot 1500m2.

LOS R OMANES - NPV2432 255,000€ This detached property situated close to the village, comprises of cloakroom, fitted kitchen, lounge/diner with doors to covered terrace. Three bedrooms, one with on-suite and family bathroom. Pool, garden, patio and parking.

LA VINUELA - NP2461 105,000€ A north east facing urban plot of 1000m2 with great views and good access. There is a project and building licence for a 169m2 house including a garage of 18m2 and pool.

LA VINUELA - NPT2173 69,000€ This village house is close to all amenities. Comprises of lounge and open plan kitchen, 2 beds and shower room.

Roof terrace with views over the village.

We would like to wish everyone a very Happy and Healthy New Year!!

www.nor manproper ties.co.uk TEL: 952 519787 FAX: 952 510994 Jo: 600 836966 John: 696 835447 Allison: 629 617308 Email: info@normanproperties.co.uk Urb. Cruce de Don Manuel, Local Comerical, Bajo 5-D, 29713, Alcaucin, Malaga

All our food is prepared using only fresh ingredients.

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LA VIÑUELA

• Conversation Classes • No Grammar • No writing • No homework • Small groups (8 max) Spanish is easy to learn. Fun classes with lots of games and lots of talking.

Money back after first lesson if not satisfied. Classes held at BAR MORENO’S. Call Anne: 952 494 325 or 635905323

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S.P Languages

I’M TOO OLD TO SPEAK SPANISH!

It’s a fact that most adults wish they had either learned to play an instrument or to speak a foreign language.

But most Brits are frightened of foreign languages, believing the popular misconception of ‘we Brits are hopeless at languages’ they are too intimidated to join a class. It’s hardly surprising when most lessons involve lengthy, boring and unnecessary grammar explanations, which you do not even understand in English, let alone Spanish! You do NOT need to know the ins and outs of grammar to speak a language successfully!

You speak English, don’t you? Learning should be fun!

At SP Languages (now in their sixth year on the Costa del Sol), they understand all of this and provide stimulating conversation classes, which will enable you to actually SPEAK the language from day one. There is no writing, no copying from the board, no homework and no boring grammar exercises. Who wants to be back at school?

What makes them so different from therest? Directed by Anne Ramos, a fellow Brit, who has 30 years experience and knows all the pitfalls, the lessons are fun and entertaining. Anne was head of teacher training and languages at Bexley College and uses a method designed especially for adults. Having gone through the process of learning Spanish herself, Anne knows exactly how you feel. Her lessons are stimulating, incorporating lots of verbal role play and various games, designed for fun whilst learning. The method used has

been specifically devised for adult learners and includes topics such as, eating out, finding your way around, going to the doctor etc. Groups are kept to a maximum of 8 people and the first thing she will teach you is the confidence to actually speak!

Learning Spanish will enable you to become fully integrated in this wonderful country and to feel the satisfaction of being understood.

Prices are extremely competitive and all levels are catered for. So confident of their method, they offer a complete money back guarantee after the first lesson, if you are not satisfied.

Classes are currently being held at Bar Morenos in Puente de Don Manuel, so talk to Anne on: 952 494 325 or 635 905 323

Do You. Care ?

Care working in the UK - Country Cousins is the UK’s leading private care specialist introduction agency, providing live-in care mainly for the elderly and infirm, enabling people to remain in their own homes for longer

Many Country Cousins live here in Spain returning to the UK frequently or every now and then for two weeks or more assignments.

If you are interested in earning between £900 - £1,140 for 15 days (one client) or £975 - £1,470 (two clients) by becoming a Country Cousin, please call Jennie for a friendly chat on: 625 807 504 or 952 115 305 (evenings)

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Cocktails

Oh my…Let’s look at the O’s of the Cocktail World!

Oak Room Special 2oz brandy, 2oz cherry brandy, 2oz crème de cacao, 1 egg white

Oatmeal Cookie (Shooter) 3/4oz butterscotch schnapps, 3/4oz Irish cream liqueur, splash of Jägermeister, splash of cinnamon schnapps

Old-Fashioned 1 sugar cube, 2-3 dashes Angostura bitters, 2 orange slices, 3oz bourbon, maraschino cherry for garnish

Old Lay - 1 1/4oz Jose Cuervo Gold tequila, 3/4oz triple sec, splash of lime juice, grenadine

Orange Blossom 3/4oz gin, 3/4 z sweet vermouth, 3/4oz orange juice

Orange Jaxx 2oz SKYY Orange vodka, 1oz Apple Pucker, small splash of cinnamon liqueur

Orange Margarita 1/2 cup of ice, 1 1/2 oz tequila, 1/2oz Triple Sec or orange liqueur, dash of lime juice, scoop of orange sherbert, orange slice and lime wedge for garnish

Orange Oasis 3oz orange juice, 1 1/2oz Plymouth gin, 1oz cherry brandy, ginger ale, orange slice for garnish

Orgasm 1oz coffee liqueur, 1oz amaretto liqueur, 1oz Irish cream liqueur, cream to fill (optional) Orient Express 3/4oz ginger liqueur, espresso

Second Hand Sofa?

1tsp

sugar,

Reasons Why You Shouldn't Buy Someone's Used Sofa

himself rather frequently.

2. The cushions begin crawling away.

9. A tag on the back says "Property of Blessed Hope Mission".

1. There's a large red tag on it marked "Evidence".

3. The fabric on the back has been repaired with a "Rebel And Proud" bumper sticker.

4. The owner asks you to sign a waiver.

5. What you thought was powdered sugar from a donut appears to be moving.

6. It appears to have reached its present location by being dragged several miles on its side.

7. The owner appears to be scratching

20

8. The owner seems reluctant to actually sit on or touch it himself.

10. It has its own nickname.

11. More than a dozen people know its nickname.

12. More than a hundred people know its nickname from a story in the local paper.

13. Someone appears to have constucted a drink holder on the armrest with a hacksaw, a torch, and a gluegun.

14. There are mushrooms growing on the back.

To advertise call 664 210 468

To advertise in The Sentinella call 664 210 468 or email sales@thesentinella.com Asda interview

Job application

A manager at Asda had the task of hiring someone to fill a job opening. After sorting through a stack of applications, he found four people who were equally qualified. He decided to call the four in and ask them only one question. Their answer would determine which of them would get the job.

The day came and as the four sat around the conference room table, the interviewer asked, 'What is the fastest thing you know of?'

The first man replied, 'A THOUGHT.' It just pops into your head. There's no warning.

'That's very good!' replied the interviewer.

'And, now you sir?', he asked the second man.

'Hmmm...let me see 'A blink! It comes and goes and you don't know that it ever happened. A BLINK is the fastest thing I know of.'

'Excellent!' said the interviewer. 'The blink of an eye, that's a very popular clichĂŠ for speed.'

He then turned to the third man, who was contemplating his reply. 'Well, out at

Poligono la Panoleta C/Juan Gris No 5 29700 Velez Malaga Tel: 952 501 543

my dad's house, you step out of the house and on the wall there's a light switch. When you flip that switch, way out across the pasture the light on the barn comes on in less than an instant.

'Yep, TURNING ON A LIGHT is the fastest thing I can think of'.

The interviewer was very impressed with the third answer and thought he had found his man. 'It's hard to beat the speed of light,' he said.

Turning to Bob, the fourth and final man, the interviewer posed the same question.

Old Bob replied, 'After hearing the previous three answers, it's obvious to me that the fastest thing known is DIARRHEA.' 'WHAT!?' said the interviewer, stunned by the response.

'Oh sure', said Bob. 'You see, the other day I wasn't feeling so good, and I ran for the bathroom, but before I could THINK, BLINK, or TURN ON THE LIGHT, I had already s### my pants.'

Bob is now the new greeter at an Asda near you!

You'll probably will think of this every time you enter an Asda from now on!...

R C O BRI E TA AD M

For your Wood - Carpentry Kitchens, Kitchen Furniture, Doors WE TALK ENGLISH!

Email: madercobritasca@terra.es / Web: www.madercobrita.net

To advertise call 664 210 468

21

World Dating

Please mention The Sentinella when replying to adverts Dating Customs Around the World These are some of the ways people date in other countries of the world.

Afghanistan Dating is rare in Afghanistan because most marriages are arranged by parents, and schools are separate for boys and girls. The opportunities to meet are rare.

Girls have a 7pm curfew, while boys have an 11pm curfew.

Australia Most teens go out in large groups and don't pair off until they are 18 or 19 years old in Australia. Girls often ask out boys and pay for the date, too. Couples often go to dinner parties, barbecues, or the beach.

Central and South America Dating is not allowed until the age of 15 here. When of age, most boys and girls date in large groups, going out together to weekend dance parties. When not dancing, teens gather at local clubs to eat and talk.

Europe Dating is usually a group event in Europe.

In Finland, as many as 30 teens may attend a movie together. Slumber parties are common in Italy and Switzerland, where teens gather for parties at a home and sleep there when the party is over.

In Spain teens join a pandilla, a club or a group of friends with the same interests, like cycling or hiking. Dating is done one-to-one and both girls and boys ask each other out and split the cost of the evening's entertainment.

Russia dates take place at dances or at clubs where teens eat or chat with friends. In small towns, teens meet in the streets downtown or gather around a fountain.

Iran It is against the law to date in Iran. Teens are separated until they are of marrying age, then their families introduce them to each other and sometimes a courtship follows.

Japan and Korea In Japan and Korea, most high school students don't date or go to parties, but spend their time studying instead. Dating begins in college, when only boys do the asking and pay for the dates.

Hairstudio and Pedicure

Sherlocks

Pedicurist Margot - specialises in Mobile Service Available the treatment of diabetes and Tel: 636 882 499 rheumatism of the foot 6 Plaza de la Ermita, - also nailart ARENAS Tel: 608 858 983 (15 mins from Velez Malaga) We speak English, Dutch, Spanish and German

22

To advertise call 664 210 468

Network Update

To advertise in The Sentinella call 664 210 468 or email sales@thesentinella.com The Sentinella is looking forward to the launch of its newest edition in Torrevieja, in the New Year, bringing the total number of The Sentinella magazines in Spain to a whopping six.

But fear not – there are still a number of great areas left in which to launch The

Sentinella.

We are still looking for the right people to launch the little mag in the Granada City and Sierra Nevada region, Murcia and Mazaron, Almeria east, including Roquetas del Mar and also Gibraltar and the Costa de la Luz. There are further opportunities up for grabs in the UK, France, Dubai, Cyprus and Portugal. All have the potential to provide massive income, especially coupled with the other four income streams which are all included in our Business

Opportunity package.

So if you think you have what it takes and you wish to increase your bank account in 2009 then drop us a line on info@thesentinella.com, call 610 976 284 or log on to our new-look website at www.thesentinella.com

Never run a mag before? Neither had our other networkers, but don’t worry as “we walk with you every step of the way.”

AMAZING BUSINESS OPPORTUNITY AT...

Would you like to be part of

The Sentinella Global Magazine Network?

We are looking for people to run The Sentinella in the following areas: Granada City Almeria West Gibraltar

Now Pay only €4,000 up front!

Further areas available in Cadiz, Sevilla & Cordoba provinces, plus along the Costa Brava, Costa Blanca, Portugal and the Islands

UK areas also

! available!

Fee includes all you need to start up and run the little mag, including software, advice, tips, training notes, back issues full support, knowledge and a comprehensive start up pack...

For enquiries call: 610 976 284 Email: thesentinella@yahoo.co.uk

To advertise call 664 210 468

23

Top Tens

Please mention The Sentinella when replying to adverts Scared of spiders? It could be worse… Top Ten Most Crippling Phobias 1. Anemophobia (Fear of Air) 2. Phagophobia (Fear of Eating) 3. Somniphobia/Clinophobia (Fear of Sleep / Fear of Beds) 4. Urophobia (Fear of Urination) 5. Anthropophobia/Lalophobia (Fear of People / Fear of Talking) 6. Nyctophobia /Photophobia (Fear of Darkness / Fear of Daylight) 7. Decidophobia (Fear of making a Decision) 8. Domatophobia (Fear of Houses) 9. Stasibasiphobia (Fear of Standing up) 10. Chronophobia (Fear of Time)

Top Ten Most Visited Tourist Attractions in Europe 1. The London Eye, London, UK 2. The Tower of London, London, UK 3. The Eiffel Tower, Paris, France 4. The Louvre, Paris, France 5. The Colosseum, Rome, Italy 6. House of Anne Frank, Amsterdam, Netherlands 7. The Musee d’Orsay, Paris, France 8. State Hermitage Museum and Winter Palace, St Petersburg, Russia 9. The Tivoli Gardens, Copenhagen, Denmark 10. Alhambra Palace, Granada, Spain

PET TAXI UK * FRANCE * SPAIN

TRAVELLING IN AIR CONDITIONED VEHICLE DELIVERED DOOR TO DOOR

PETS STAY IN PET FRIENDLY HOTELS ACCOMPANIED TRAVEL AVAILABLE TEL:

24

(0044) 7850 575862 (0034) 667 235 205 email: pettaxitransport@hotmail.com To advertise call 664 210 468

$Share’oscope$

To advertise in The Sentinella call 664 210 468 or email sales@thesentinella.com Here’s our how this year’s shares faired up:

480 Halma @ 208p-206p £988.00 255 Lamprell@ 391p-85p £216.75 160 Hardy Oil @ 622p-196p £313.60 266 Tesco @375p-327p £869.32 277 Barrett Dev. @ 360p-58p £160.66 322 Telecom plus @ 310p-322 £1036.89 421 Stagecoach @ 237p-128p £538.88 11,111 Fortune Oil @ 9p-7p £777.77 543 Findel @184p-98p £532.14 204 Prudential @ 490p-347p £707.88 833 Vodaphone @ 120p-129p £1074.57 8333 DSG int. @ 12p-15p £1249.95

Well, the year is over and Mr Share Master turned our fictitious £12,000 into £9,540.91. Not brilliant, but this has been one of the worst years in recent times, so maybe it's not SO bad. You did have the chance to sell some of these shares during the year at a reasonable profit.

During 2009 Mr Share Master will be looking closely at Penny Shares. All the companies he picks will cost under £1 per share. There will also be the opportunity to buy the share before The Sentinella goes to print each month. By making a payment of 10€ a month (or 100€ a year in advance) the share will be delivered to your email address as soon as it is picked. We are starting this new service because by the time you see our pick in The Sentinella, 10-14 days have passed and the share may have already altered in price.

Email: pnsharemaster@yahoo.co.uk and we will send you our payment details.

Half of the money collected will go to a charity of The Sentinella’s choice.

Mr Sharemaster’s share pick for Jan 09 is Sepura plc. He has bought 3125 shares at 32p per share. The company specialises in Mobile Radio Communications.

To advertise call 664 210 468

25

Please mention The Sentinella when replying to adverts

Perfect Lawn

ALL THE BEST WISHES AND GOOD FORTUNES FOR 2009.

It is 2009, the beginning of a worldwide difficult year. Crisis after crisis is being announced. We all have to tighten our belts. Now look at the bright side, we are living in Spain with an average of 320 sunny days a year. If you were back in England, or any where else in northern Europe, you would have the same economic crisis. The only difference being that you would have the doom and gloom of the miserable weather on top of your troubles!

You can save on a few items, like electrics and water and foodwise, it is well worth shopping around, every restaurant in Spain by law, has to offer a “Menu del dia”, a three course meal with a maximum price of ten Euros. Many places don’t broadcast this too loudly, but they have to offer it. Just ask what the menu is! You can have a very good

26

meal for approximately five Euros at many Chinese restaurants. Electricity wise use lower wattage lamps and use long life bulbs.

Think ahead towards spring or summer, think now, on how you could save on water in 2009. Installing artificial grass around the garden saves a lot of water, work, material and effort. It is a one-off investment that can last you up to 25 years. It stops the dust and will be green all year round.

So think economical and think Green, not only for your wallet, but also for the environment. For more information visit www.stylexgreen.com or phone Gerry for a free quote on 678 103 028.

So make the most of life and the perks of Spain, and enjoy the reason why you came here. Have a good and green New year!

See main advert on page 34

To advertise call 664 210 468

‘Chez Spice wishes you a Happy New Year and thank everyone for their trust. We closed 2008 with more than 800 new customers and during 2009 continues to offer the best quality and the best price’.

M e n u - Monday - Thursday, Sunday & Bank Holiday 9.95€ S m o k i n g allowed in our Cosy Tent F r e e papadam per person and 10% discount for takeaway F r e e Wi-Fi access O p e n i n g H o u r s : 19.00 - 22.30 Sunday 13.30 - 15.30 Closed Tuesday C h e z S p i c e : Road to Los Romanes, La Carpa S p e c i a l

C al l: 6 50 8 87 1 0 0

ALL TYPES OF WORK CONSIDERED AND TREATED IN CONFIDENCE; ***NOW LOCATED AT NORMAN PROPERTIES*** PUENTE DON MANUEL

Please telephone Helen for an appointment

(0034) 618 408 797 10 am till 6pm

PINO

ELECTRICIDAD

Special Offer:

79,95€

Special Offer:

16,95€

Special Offer:

19,95€

Uplighter with Spot D45 - R50 60 / 40W Chrome / White Halogen Radiator Radiant Panel Metal / 1200W Heater Crystal 3 heat settings Warmth & Maximum Height Automatic comfort 1.8 metres oscillation 1000W Safety cut out 660x445x70mm Special Offer:

8,95€

Special Offer:

16,95€

Special Offer:

Wall Spot Light R50 - 40W Chrome / White

Triple Spot Light R50 - 40W Chrome / White 600mm

Double Spot Light R50 - 40W Chrome / White 400mm

12,95€

C/del Rio, Custudio Puga, 9-A TORRE DEL MAR Tel: 95 254 03 92 Fax: 95 254 32 93

Sirocco aariviss technologies

aariviss technologies are based in the Velez-Malaga/Torre Del Mar area of La Axarquia.

We specialise in the technology areas listed below.

I n for m a t io n Se c ur i t y Web D es i gn Anti virus options We specialise in web sites for small businesses How to keep your information safe and intact Clear and informative web sites How to secure your computer against attack Inexpensive web sites Information back-up advice No jargon, no complications and no problems I T Tra in in g P C H e l p a n d Tr o u b l e - s h o o t i n g Operating systems help Software Installation issues Computer troubleshooting and help

Microsoft Office and OpenOffice software training Browser and Internet training Training in the use of e-mail and its associated software Multi-media (music, pictures and video) help and training

If you would like to know more about our services, go to our website, www.aariviss.com or e-mail us at info@aariviss.com.

Alternatively, call us on 686 412 877 to arrange a meeting.

Muebles

Open: Mon. - Fri. 10:00am - 14:00pm Sat. 10:00am - 14:00pm OPEN ALL DAY NO SIESTAS

CF Furniture S ALL SUITES POCKET SPRUNG, SCOTCH GUARDED AND COVERED BY ISO 9001 CERTIFICATE

ITALIAN LEATHER SOFA CENTRE YOU WILL FIND THE BIGGEST CHOICE OF SOFAS & THE LARGEST SELECTION OF TOP BRITISH BEDS ALL IN STOCK FOR IMMEDIATE FREE LOCAL DELIVERY

POOL TABLE

ATILAS

INTERNET ACCESS

Monday nights - 8.30pm - Bingo - good cash prizes Tuesday nights - 8.30pm - Successful quiz - good cash prizes

Serving food all day

Monday - Friday 10am - 10pm Saturday 12 noon - 10pm Sunday Roasts served 1pm - 6pm 2 courses 9.95€ + coffee SKY SPORTS, SETANTA Please note; through January, we will be closed on Thursdays *** Beat the Credit Crunch and join us Mon, Tues, Wed & Fri 6pm - 7pm for HAPPY HOUR*** For information or bookings

call: 685 552 529 C/Buena Vista, Puente don Manuel

Kieler JURGEN steak house

open 9am - 11pm (Closed Tuesdays) S P E C I A L G R E E K K E B A B P L AT E 1/2 Crispy Duck with Red Cabbage & Potato Dumplings S pe c i a l 3 c o u r s e ev e ni n g m e nu

Now Serving 3 course Sunday Lunch 11€ Jan. 11th & 25th Live Music (Tea Dance) BOOKINGS now being taken for a special candlelit dinner on february 14th with live music from fred function room available for birthday parties, etc Nr. Centro Internacional 72BJ Algarrobo Costa (Opposite large swimming pool) Tel:628 239 780

jURGEN WOULD LIKE to wish everyone A HAPPY nEW yEAR

Puente don Manuel

NEW YEAR

NEW CHEF NEW MENU

Introducing “Ben” straight from Pompey.

Young, fresh & innovative - newly qualified from Highgate College-Good food as well as Good looks!!

Come & try his new menu on a ‘FREE sample evening’ (date to be confirmed)

A warm welcome guaranteed at our family run restaurant.

As well as homecooked, traditional English & Spanish dishes, we also offer specials of the day for 6.50€, homebaked cakes, fresh tapas and a variety of snacks What’s On.....

Saturday 17th January - Fun Casino with FREE hot buffet in aid of Mike Springthorpe Saturday 24th January - ‘Katie & Baz’ - Elvis Presley Tribute evening with basket meal deal @ 8.00€ - Bookings only Saturday 31st January - Entertainment evening - ‘Mr. & Mrs.’ Special 10€ meal including a drink* - Bookings only *glass of wine or a tubo

Puente don Manuel Mondays ...

Tuesdays ...

Wednesdays ...

Thursdays ...

Fridays ...

Saturdays ...

Sundays ...

What else happens......

Market 10am - 2pm Dancing with Hugh Grant 4pm - 5.30pm Bridge Club - 2pm - 6pm Keep Fit Dance - 6pm - 7.30pm CLOSED Alcaucin British Legion from 12 noon Quiz Night with Paul - 9pm - 11pm Once a month Disco/Karaoke Various Entertainment Last Sunday of the Month - Car Boot Fair Best Homecooked Sunday Lunches around

Watch This Space.......

Bingo Children’s Club Caramel’s Masterchef Private functions catered for as well as outside catering & bar. Up to 80 seated in the restaurant, 150 by the pool including Marquee :Testimonials available on request For more information on upcoming entertainment or reservations, please call Melanie on: 618 587 146

STYLEX GREEN REALISTIC ARTIFICIAL GRASS B E FOR E AF T E R

More than 40 Varieties All Weather Resistant 10 Year Guarantee Child & Pet Friendly Looks Just Like Grass Low Maintenance No More Mowing!

Ideal For Gardens, Poolsides, Terraces, Paths and Patios

B E FOR E A FTE R

WISHING YOU A HAPPY AND GREEN 2009

Tel: 678 103 028 www.stylexgreen.com info@stylexgreen.com

Countries of The World

To advertise in The Sentinella call 664 210 468 or email sales@thesentinella.com Around the World in 192 Months.

Starting this month, a look at every country on the planet. As usual we run from A-Z! At last count there were 192 countries internationally recognised, so it will take a while to reach Zimbabwe…16 years in fact!

So coming in at number one, it’s that poppy producing, AK47 firing, turban wearing…

GDP Per Capita - US $700 Total Area - 250,000sqm

Famous for - War & heroine production Infamous for - The Taliban

Main reasons to go there - You are in the armed forces and want to kick ass.

Biggest Celebrity - The one and only Osama Bin Laden of course!

National Sports - Buzkashi & goat grabbing

Amazing but True - As late as 1998 the US government was paying the salary of every single Taliban official in Afghanistan.

Afghanistan

Population - 30,000,000 Language - Pashtu Located - SW Asia

Capital City - Kabul

Currency - The Afghani Religion - 90% Muslim

All mechanical work like Clutches, Brakes & Car Services.

Are you converting your English car to Spanish plates?

Let us do the paperwork.

We speak English.

Main exports - Carpets, drugs Literacy Rate - 36 per cent

Life Expectancy - 46 years

To advertise call 664 210 468

35

2009

Please mention The Sentinella when replying to adverts

New Year’s Resolutions

Here are 10 tips to help get you started when making your’s…

1. Be realistic The surest way to fall short of your goal is to make your goal unattainable. For instance, resolving to never eat your favourite food again could be a bad choice. Strive for a goal that is attainable, such as avoiding it more often than you do now.

2. Plan ahead Don't make your resolution on New Year's Eve. If you wait until the last minute, it will be based on your mindset that particular day. Instead, it should be planned well before December 31 arrives.

3. Outline your plan Decide how you will deal with the temptation to skip that exercise class or have one more cigarette. This could include calling on a friend for help, practicing positive thinking and self-talk.

4. Make a "pro" and "con" list It may help to see a list of items on paper to keep your motivation strong.

Develop this list over time, and ask others to contribute to it. Keep your list with you and refer to it when you need help keeping your resolve.

5. Talk about it Don't keep your resolution a secret. Tell friends and family members who will be there to support your resolve to change yourself for the better or improve your

36

health. The best case scenario is to find yourself a buddy who shares your New Year's resolution and motivate each other.

6. Reward yourself This doesn't mean that you can eat an entire box of chocolates if your resolution is to diet. Instead, celebrate your success by treating yourself to something that you enjoy that does not contradict your resolution. If you've been sticking to your promise to eat better, for example, perhaps your reward could be going to a movie with a friend.

7. Track your progress Keep track of each small success you make toward reaching your larger goal.

Short-term goals are easier to keep, and small accomplishments will help keep you motivated.

8. Don't beat yourself up Obsessing over the occasional slip won't help you achieve your goal. Do the best you can each day, and take each day one at a time.

9. Stick to it Experts say it takes about 21 days for a new activity, such as exercising, to become a habit, and 6 months for it to become part of your personality. Your new healthful habits will become second-nature in no time.

10. Keep trying If your resolution has totally run out of steam by mid-February, don't despair.

Start over again! There's no reason you can't make a "New Year's resolution" any time of year.

Good luck!

To advertise call 664 210 468

To advertise in The Sentinella call 664 210 468 or email sales@thesentinella.com

Simple Jet

This made me laugh out loud. Written by my brother Kelly Keating, for The Sentinella Costa Tropical

It is some time since I booked a budget airline flight online and it will certainly be the last. Budget airlines are now strict no-goers for me. For the future I am quite happily going to book myself on to scheduled flights with the big carriers, even if it does cost me more.

What a farce…I just want a ticket, no more, no less. I just want to get where I want to go without partaking in a Spanish Inquisition. “Simple jet?” More like “How difficult can we bloody make it for you jet?” In theory it should have been simple enough. All that was required was one ticket from London back to Spain. I had credit card in hand and I know my name and address off by heart, surely that’s all I needed? I even knew exactly when and from where I wanted

to travel. But no. not happy with accepting my hard earned money to transport me in cattle like conditions whilst trying to bribe me into buying scratchcards “for charity” and attempting to flog me slices of pizza made of playdough for a fiver a pop, they want to break my will to live too. The last time I booked a flight online, it took all of about 90 seconds. This time round the best part of about half an hour as I negotiated my way through a minefield of obscure questions. Will I have a bag? Would I like speedy boarding? Would I like to purchase travel insurance? How many pairs of skis would I be carrying? What was my promotional code? And would I like to pay for my carbon offsetting, so I could save the planet too! Well I never! What began as a forty quid cheapy had all of a sudden turned into double that, just for turning up!

Translator I think we can all relate to that :-)

*Hospital visits *Document Translation *Phone Calls *ITV tests *NIE numbers *Social Security & anything else you need help with when it comes to the Spanish language “I am a Spanish native with a good level of English.”

Call Chema on: 654 403 146 To advertise call 664 210 468

37

Amazing Animals

Please mention The Sentinella when replying to adverts This month we giddy up and saddle down to look at the Horse.

Horses belong to the equus family.

Equus comes from the ancient Greek word meaning quickness.

Horses are mammals in the same family as zebras, mules and donkeys.

An average life span for a horse is around 20 -25 years, though they can live for up to 30 years. The oldest recorded horse was "Old Billy," an English barge horse, who lived to be 62 years old.

Horses don't have gall bladders.

Horses can see colour.

The teeth of a horse take up more space in the head than the brain.

Human hair and fingernails are made

from the same protein as horse hooves.

Horses hooves grow about 1/4 inch per a month, taking almost a year to grow from coronet to ground.

The only mode of transportation on the Greek island of Hydra are horses and ponies.

Horses are more comfy when facing the rear of the trailer they are riding in.

Manhole covers were originally designed with raised surfaces to keep horses from slipping.

Silly Laws

In New York City, it is illegal to open or close an umbrella in the presence of a horse.

Blowing your nose around horses is a no-no in Waterville, Maine and Leahy, Washington.

Human females weighing over 200 pounds, when wearing shorts, may not legally ride a horse in Markanville, Illinois. It's women wearing kimonos who can't ride down a public street in Raton, New Mexico.

Saco, Missouri prohibits scary hats so you won't frighten horses, and Steadfield, Michigan bans riders from wearing masks and being unshaven.

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To advertise call 664 210 468

2009 Tips!

To advertise in The Sentinella call 664 210 468 or email sales@thesentinella.com Tips for the ladies in year 2009

1. Aspire to be Barbie - the bitch has everything.

2. If the shoe fits - buy one in every colour.

3. Take life with a pinch of salt... A wedge of lime, and a shot of tequila.

4. In need of a support group? - Cocktail hour with the girls!

5. Go on the 30 day diet. (I'm on it and so far I've lost 15 days).

6. When life gets you down - just put on your big girl panties and deal with it.

7. Let your greatest fear be that there is no PMS and this is just your personality.

8. I know I'm in my own little world, but it's ok. They know me here..

9. Lead me not into temptation, I can find it myself.

10. Don't get your knickers in a knot, it solves nothing; and makes you walk funny.

11. When life gives you lemons in 2008 - turn it into lemonade then mix it with vodka.

12. Remember every good looking; sweet, single male is someone else's ex-boyfriend!

To advertise call 664 210 468

39

Please mention The Sentinella when replying to adverts

What Colours Mean?

We live in a colourful world. In many countries, colours represent various holidays; they are also used to express feelings and enliven language.

So what does red mean?

For the ancient Romans, a red flag was a signal for battle.

Because of its visibility, stop signs, stoplights, brake lights, and fire equipment are all painted red.

The ancient Egyptians considered themselves a red race and painted their bodies with red dye for emphasis.

In Russia, red means beautiful. The Bolsheviks used a red flag as their symbol when they overthrew the tsar in 1917.

That is how red became the colour of communism.

In India, red is the symbol for a soldier.

In South Africa, red is the colour of mourning.

the colour of the House of Lancaster, which defeated the House of York, symbolized by the colour white.

The “Redshirts” were the soldiers of the Italian leader Garibaldi, who unified modern Italy in the nineteenth century.

To “see red” is to be angry.

A “red herring” is a distraction, something that takes attention away from the real issue.

A “red eye” is an overnight airplane flight.

If a business is “in the red,” it is losing money.

Funny Pics

Life really boils down to two questions;

It's considered good luck to tie a red bow on a new car.

In China, red is the colour of good luck and is used as a holiday and wedding colour. Chinese babies are given their names at a red-egg ceremony.

Superstitious people think red frightens the devil.

A “red-letter day” is one of special importance and good fortune.

1. Should I buy a dog?

2. Or should I have children?

In Greece, eggs are dyed red for good luck at Easter time.

To “paint the town red” is to celebrate.

Red is the colour most commonly found in national flags.

In the English War of the Roses, red was 40

To advertise call 664 210 468

TONY PHILLIPS

Terence Seaton & J Daniel Renovations & Refurbishments Professional Builders with over Pai g ntin ilin 20 years experience g

T

El e ing ctri b ci t y m Pl u Free advice / no obligations www.jdanielconstrucciones.com Eng. Tel: 664 459 868 Esp. Tlf: 699 402 208

VI LLA LOOK IN G SH ABB Y?

Van & trailers.

Light haulage, removals up to 25m3, car & boat transport.

Vinuela based, 25 years experience.

Local or anywhere in Europe.

Regular Spain-UK-Spain trips.

Phone 636 844 209 E-mail: hazeltony@live.co.uk

SKY INSTALLED from €350 Includes all BBC, ITV, CH4 & CH5 DISH ONLY FITS 1.2m €250, 1.3m €300 Spanish, German also installed Service calls, realignment, relocation, etc, from €50 Call Paul 669 943 452 Velez Malaga All areas covered Coming soon FREESAT Recordable Boxes

Let me give you a free quote for re-painting at affordable prices.

Exteriors/Interiors, Rejas & Garden Walls My team can help.

Phone Nick in Vinuela

On: 6 7 6 49 1 8 11

ACADEMIA GALA

SPANISH COURSES INTENSIVE & CONVERSATIONAL ALL LEVELS AVAILABLE Including for children starting school C/Fragata, 6, Torre del Mar

Tel: 952 54 40 39

Th e Wr ou gh t I r on M an

Taking care of all your wrought iron needs Over 10 years experience *Gates *Railings *Rejas *Curtain Poles *Market Stalls

IF IT’S NOT ON THE LIST JUST ASK Mob: 689 099 928 Tel: 952 508 562 Email: wroughtironman@live.com

Please mention The Sentinella when replying to adverts

Andalucia Damp Control

Andalucia Damp Control is a legally registered company in Spain. Identification No: G92937556 and only employ fully qualified and professional technicians Dampness in buildings takes many forms and it is not unusual for so called experts to mistakenly identify any dampness as rising damp. Similarly, there are so many situations where these same people specify repairs that will not solve the problems. It is important to be fully informed, and if in doubt, consult an expert.

The main causes of dampness are:rain water penetration through walls, leaking and blocked down pipes, spoutings and balconies, leaking from bathrooms, condensation and lack of sub floor ventilation.

has solved in the UK and now being resident in the area for approximately 4 years he is able to offer his free advice and solution to your problems in a professional manner.

David specialises in electrical and plumbing work and was fully qualified in the UK. As a resident in the Axarquia for 6 years he has re-qualified to the standards by the Spanish Authorities. He has a great knowledge of the area and extensive experience in general building and light construction work.

During the last few years he has gained full experience in the treatment of damp issues and water ingress here in Andalucia.

See main advert on page 51

Keith is 62 years old and from a general surveying background. He has specialised in solving water ingress (damp) problems in the UK for approximately 10 years, where weather is more extreme than found here. He has professionally solved flood related problems, general rising damp and penetrating damp problems, sub ground areas where constant water ingress is present and even areas where running water is adjacent to buildings effecting foundations.

In conversation with many home owners in our area he has identified a need to eliminate water ingress problems not dissimilar to the situations he

42

To advertise call 664 210 468

Roman Tile Mosaics

Floors, Walls & Ceilings Let me use a Photo or Drawing I can Immortalise it Call Paul: 636 857 697 Call Ian 657 247 647 or email: drivetec@gmail.com

*Qualified UK Driving Instructor *Refresher & Advanced Lessons *4x4 & off-road courses

Able to help anyone overcome whatever problems they have in dealing with everyday driving in Spain.

English Dental Technician Over 20 years experience Fully Qualified Denture Repairs Adjustments / Duplications Based in Torrox Pueblo We can visit if needed Call Graham for confidential advice on any denture problem on: 952 539 219 / 622 719 640

DENTIST Dr Bakri

Dentures Implants & Dental Cosmetics Free check up for The Sentinella readers

Algarrobo Costa Torrox Costa Tel: 952 55 05 21 Tel: 952 53 20 12

Emergencies: 678 974 892

Carous el

Secondhand Furniture Shop

Open 9.30am - 2pm

Sale of single mattresses & bases ideal for rental properties Book exchange available Now on ground floor!

Call Gilly on: 630 211 907

La Vinuela Pueblo (Down steps at side of Bank)

Closed: until 5th Jan

Where Music Exists...

Music Shop in Torre del Mar

* Guitars * Amplifiers * Electric Pianos * Bass Guitars * Drums * Percussion * School Materials * Learning Books * Accessories C/ Ros Alferez, no 5, Torre del Mar Tel: 952 541 893

Please mention The Sentinella when replying to adverts

BEM idiomas

If you read my article last month you would remember me asking ‘When is the right time to learn Spanish?’ and for me it was now, as my 4 year old daughter was speaking fluently and the only words I could understand were the mere basics , ‘Hola, Gracias and Adios’!

I have had now for me what I call a lot of Spanish lessons, 7 in total and I love every minute of them.

After my first nerve wracking lesson, which actually ended up being very relaxed and productive, I am now really beginning to actually understand the whole ‘verb’ concept, on paper! I now just have to put it into practice when I ‘try’ and speak and write which is a whole new experience!!

The thing I love about BEM idiomas is how they really care about everyone

44

individually, as you are not just a statistic but make sure you are happy with how your progress is coming along. My teacher especially, must have the patience of a saint! I am no Einstein but she stays so calm and professional with me even after she has had to repeat herself for the 10th time. But that’s what I love, I don’t feel embarrassed or ashamed, she will go over it however many times is right for me.

BEM idiomas have now moved to their new bigger location just up the road to ensure there is enough space for everyone, and I must say how professional looking the new building is, spacious, and modern with even a lovely coffee machine to keep you nice and awake for your lesson!

This months new verb to learn is: llamarse - To call yo me llamo - I call tú te llamas - You call él se llama nosotros nos llamamos vosotros os llamáis ellos se llaman

See main advert on page 100 or call 952 549 233

To advertise call 664 210 468

D&S ELECTRICS

A professional service for all your electrical needs *Illuminate your outside spaces with garden lighting *Electrical repairs and installations for the home *Commercial and industrial work undertaken Call for a free quote Dave 616 681 567 Steve 657 048 833

TONY’S POKERS TOOL HIRE

MIXERS

All types of tools Chainsaw Sharpening Service

Venta Baja based For more details call: 951 167 093 693 505 272 693 286 625

WACKER PLATES

English Vehicle

Mechanic

*Former MOT Tester *35 Years Experience *Mechanical Work, Services, Brakes, Clutches, *24hr Breakdown Recovery *Yours or my premises Tel: Bill: 951 163 086 / 680 324 856 Email: gill2712@msn.com

DEUTSCHE BACKEREI KELLER GERMAN BAKERY 17 kinds of Bread/Rolls Baked Fresh Daily

‘Offers’ every Thursday Open 8am - 2pm Mon - Sat Call: 95 254 67 35

Avda. Tore-Tore 30, Torre del Mar

SOLID BUILDING

TERRACING PAVING CLADDING RETAINING WALLS BRICKWORK CONCRETING PAINTING DECORATING NO JOB TOO SMALL

951 167 555 / 622 497 941 Reliable - Competitive Professional

CHIROPODIST (Registered) Foot & Hand Care

Treatment for Corns, Veruccas & hard skin etc...

Also Manicures, Pedicures Mon-Sat 9.30 - 14.00,17.00 - 21.00 Now doing Home Visits

C/Pizarra 40, (above bank), La Vinuela Tel: 695 243 238

European Soccer School Making Soccer Fun WE OFFER: Toddlers Football - Girls Football Fun Football Camps - Federal Football Centres of Excellence - Senior Football Skills Award Programme Coach Education - Pro Training Camps

For further details or booking forms please contact me by email: ljogbolu@hotmail.com or on: 0034 697 915 833 Luke Ogbolu Director of Coaching European Soccer School

MAN & VAN!

Anytime...Anywhere

Locally based 12 cubic metres €25 per hour

S m a l l L o a d s to U . K Phone Mark: 951 321 660 669 255 968

Please mention The Sentinella when replying to adverts

Random Jokes

I got a phone call from a gorgeous ex- 'And you want it full of Carp?'. girlfriend the other day. We lost track of 'Check' time chatting about the wild, romantic 'Why?' asks the perplexed Noah, who was slowly but surely getting to the end nights we used to enjoy together.

I couldn’t believe it when she asked if I’d of his tether........... be interested in meeting up to try and 'Dunno', says God, 'I just fancied a MultiStorey Carp Ark'' rekindle a little bit of that ‘old magic’.

“Wow!” I said. “I don’t know if I could ----------------------------------------------------keep pace with you now. I’m a bit older Husband and wife are shopping in and a bit balder than when you last saw Tesco’s when the man picks up a crate me.” She just giggled and said she was of Stella and sticks them into the trolley 'What do you think you're doing?' asks sure I’d rise to the challenge.

“Yeah,” I said. “Just so long as you don’t the wife 'They're on offer, only £10 for 24 mind a man with a waistline that’s a few cans', he says.

'Put them back. We can't afford it,' says inches wider these days.”

She laughed and told me to stop being the wife and they carry on shopping... so silly. She teased me saying that tubby A few aisles later the woman picks up a bald men were cute. Then she said it £20 jar of face cream and sticks it into didn’t matter in the slightest about my the trolley. hair or my weight and that she’d even 'What do you think you're doing?' asks put on a few pounds herself. So I told the man, 'It's my face cream. It makes me look beautiful,' she says. her to get lost.

----------------------------------------------------- The man replies...'But so does 24 cans One day God calls down to Noah and of Stella and it’s half the bloody price’. says, 'Noah me old china, I want you to ----------------------------------------------------A man says to his wife 'tell me somemake me a new Ark'.

Noah replies, 'No probs God, me old thing that will make me happy and sad at Supreme Being, anything you want after the same time'.

His wife replies 'You've got a bigger all you're the guv...

But God interrupts, 'Ah, but there's a knob than your brother'. catch. This time Noah, I want not just a ----------------------------------------------------couple of decks, I want 20 decks one on A history teacher asks a class full of kids 'What was Churchill famous for?' top of the other'.

'20 DECKS!', screams Noah. 'Well, OK A kid at the back shouts out 'He was the last white man to be called Winston!'

Big Man, whatever you say.

Should I fill it up with all the animals just ----------------------------------------------------What's the ideal weight for a mother-inlike last time?'

'Yep, that's right, well . . sort of right . . law? this time I want you to fill it up with fish', About 2.3 pounds including the urn.

----------------------------------------------------God answers.

'Fish?', queries Noah.

Was so depressed last night that I rang 'Yep, fish . . well, to make it more specific the Samaritans. Got through to a call Noah, I want carp, wall to wall, floor to centre in Pakistan. Told them I was suiceiling Carp!' cidal, they got all excited and asked if I Noah looks to the skies. 'OK God my old could fly a plane...... mucker, let me get this right, You want a ----------------------------------------------------New Ark?' Q. Whats the difference between a wife 'Check'. and a girlfriend?

'With 20 decks, one on top of the other?'.

A. 3 Stone!

'Check'.

46 To advertise call 664 210 468

CARS 4 SALE

New & second hand selection of cars, MPVs & 4x4s All vehicles on Spanish plates, ITV, tax, warranty & paper work inclusive. For details of what’s in stock phone: 660 182 514 (anytime)

Blue Badge Mobility

952 967 015 635 445 297 / 635 445 279

Locals 3 & 10, Bloque 3, Costa del Oro, Torrox Costa

Hir e & sales of mobility scooter s, wheelchair s, walking aids, bathroom aids, bed fr ames, hoists & much mor e..Wheel chair adapted tr anspor t including mini-bus. sales@bluebadgemobility.com

NAIL’Z

MOBILE NAIL TECHNICIAN

*FRENCH

TIP OR NATURAL FINISH 30€

*MANICURES

JUST 15€ TELEPHONE NOW: 691 621 198 COVERING TORROX COSTA &

ANUNCIAR AQUI PARA SOLO €20 SURROUNDING AREAS

LLAMA AL 666 310 158 Ó POR E-MAIL: sales@thesentinella.com

Spanish Number Plates with no hassle & no unnecessary expenses Sara Bright:

951 167 094 658 501 610

PATSY

M o b i le H a ir d r es s i n g

(UK Qualified) Tints, High Lights, Complete Restyles, Wedding Contracts (on request)

Tel 679562328 or email: mo r ty.mor ty@btopenw or ld.com STUART BURNETT I.T.E.C.

Visiting Massage Therapist 20 Years experience Massage can help many problems including; Back Pain, Arthritis, Stress, etc.

For enquiries Tel: Stuart on:

665 190 121

stuart_burnett@hotmail.com

COLONIC IRRIGATION A HEALTHY MOVE

Cleaning of the Colon A detox Enjoy: clearer skin, increased energy, weight loss, mental clarity and more...

Call Eileen: 951 167 238 or 609 811 879 (near Hotel Vinuela)

Please mention The Sentinella when replying to adverts

Stop Smoking

Make 2009 the year you really did stop smoking.

If you quit smoking this January; •you will be twelve times less likely to die from lung cancer •you will be ten times less likely to die from lung disease •you will be ten times less likely to die from cancer of the larynx •you will be six times less likely to die of heart disease •you will be half as likely to die of a stroke As smokers, we learn early on to put up a mental wall of denial between our smoking habit and the harsh reality of the damage we're inflicting on ourselves with every cigarette smoked.

We tell ourselves lies that allow us to smoke with some level of comfort. We say we have time to quit...that cancer doesn't run in our family...that we can quit any time we want to...that the bad things happen to other people. And because smoking is typically a slow killer, those lies support the framework of our

wall of denial for years and years.

Eventually though, most smokers find that the wall begins to crumble, and bit by bit, smoking becomes a fearful, anxious activity. This is when most smokers start seriously thinking about how they might find a way to quit smoking for good.

Stop Smoking In Spain uses the very latest technology called Bioresonance therapy which has had so much positive press coverage recently i.e. Richard & Judy, BBC News 24 and The Telegraph that you are probably already aware of it. All of the videos and press releases can be seen on the website.

So if you feel it is the right time for you to quit or you would just like to learn more about the therapy and how it works, then make sure you obtain a ‘further information pack’ without obligation (includes details of your nearest centre).

Also Carol can be found working at The Rebbecah Curtis Wellbeing Centre.

For more information see page 54

Baby Blue

Introducing Liam Toller, aka Baby Blue, an outstanding new talent to hit the music scene.

21 year old Liam was born in Cambridge and for the past 10 years has been raised and educated in Spain. Bi-lingual in English & Spanish, Baby Blue is able to bring his unique fluid delivery of catchy punch lines and floating R&B runs, strategically placed over his headbobbing tracks, to a wide and diverse audience. This producer/artist can set off beats and drop rhymes that will make you want to dance, blending rhythms with a touch of the raw uncut that continues to reinforce his trendy style and street credibility.

How does he do it? Don't let the smooth face fool you, this artist has definitely made his presence known throughout the Hip-Hop underground scene & has demonstrated his skills with sexy lyrics and catchy punch lines that you just can't get out of your head. After recordi48 To advertise call

ng his debut album as an unsigned artist at Soho Studios in London, mixed and mastered by Joe Fields, who has predicted great success for this great unsigned talent, Baby Blue's album has had various songs charted at number 1 in the Soundclick charts. All of his music is available on I.Tunes, Amazon mp3, Rhapsody & Napster.

Baby Blue is a name unique to one up and coming, multi-talented writer/producer/rapper-singer with a truly diverse and versatile stage performance and artistic ability. This newcomer has set his sights on the big time and brings his own style to the creative genre of music which, together with his swagger, lyrics, punch-lines and aura set him apart from all of the other artists, bringing a whole new style to the table. www.babybluemusic.net www.soundclick.com/babybluemusic www.myspace.com/babybluemusik babybluemusic@me.com 0034-699 553 734

664 210 468

SAXON S.L JC B D ig g e r H ir e Velez-Malaga Area Rates: Special Offers:

Large Digger 260â‚Ź all day (8hrs) inc. local Travel Small Digger 130â‚Ź all day (8hrs) inc. local Travel Other services inc.

Plumbing and Drainage Septic Tanks, Carpentry & CCTV pipe surveys

67 8 2 3 2 2 5 3 662 39 83 72 Email: saxonsl@live.co.uk

653 634 633 sunkitchens@hotmail.com

N-340 KM 281/282 Edf. Los Llanos, 1 - Bajo Ctra. Malaga-Almeria, 29793 Torrox Costa

Call Javier at: 666 13 88 86 or email: magnolialandscaping@yahoo.co.uk Free quotations and good prices

General Reforms

C/ Duque de Ahumada Edif. Puerto Rico, local 2 29740 TORRE DEL MAR E-mail:scapote@gmail.com (Next to Market Square)

TORRE D ArteStudio

www.photocalahonda.com

637 820 791 649 700 633 952 54 09 23

Pasatiempo Libreria C/Infantes 32 29740 Torre del Mar Malaga

BOOKS, MAPS, GUIDES, GREETINGS CARDS, POSTCARDS, NEWSPAPERS, MAGAZINES IN MANY LANGUAGES Tel: 952 543 703 bookshop@bookshoppasatiempo.com

viajes lola

Travel Agent

MSC FANTASIA

“The most beautiful boat in the World”

12 day Med & Atlantic cruise Leaving Malaga from 13th January to 15th February

From 690€

(not including taxes)

Avda. Andalucia, 147, TORRE DEL MAR Tel: 952 541 586 - Fax: 952 545 299 E-mail: viajeslola@gruposercom.com

Vidal Sassoon Trained in London *Highlights, transparencies, colour *Bridal advice *Facials *Manicures, pedicures *Eye lash tinting *Electrolysis, warm & cold waxing *Micro-pigmentation: eye brows, lips, eye liner & beauty spots *Hair straightening, waves & blow dry C/ San Martin 15A, Torre del Mar Tel: 95 254 4827

C/Playa Marina L, 2b Next to SuperSol (Torre del Mar) Tel: 952 543 955

**9 passport photos for just 5€** English,German & Spanish speaking

Ht a p p y N e

rke a M y a d urs h T

11.00 - 16.00 20.00 - 01.00

Monday closed Tel: 652 940 303

la canita r sel f-service bee

C/Enmedio Edf. Alsina

Promenade

C O M P L E M E N T O S K OA L A f A S HI O N BOU T IQ UE Gifts, Bags, Jewellery & Designer Clothes 10.00 - 13.30 17.00 - 20.30

Pasaje Santa Margarita 1, (Entry C/del Mar & C/Santa Margarita)

Telephone: 695 693 182

DEL MAR VINOMAR Selected wines

We personalise your wine bottles

Olive oil from “Baena” C/Piscis, local 1b - Torre del Mar Tel: 952 54 58 04 / 654 97 76 29 vinomar@terra.es / macacaho@hotmail.com

ew Year!!!

Ligh thou se

Pa

o se

ri o

s

o

M

itim ar

ay a

“I am waiting for you here”

ed ar io

Pl

a Avd

P ia ase luCc/D o a C d de An /En el La . de m M

Chiringuito s

Bilingual Nursery

Open from 7.30 to 20.30 (Mon - Fri) Now open in the afternoons!

Play Area for 0 - 7 years Celebrate Birthdays Qualified Staff in Secure Premises (cctv, etc.)

THERAPEUTIC MASSAGE Achim, Sylvana & Kelly

Avda. Tore Tore Edf. Santa Fe 38 10am - 7.00pm Monday - Friday

Tel: 619 060 272 Call for Appointment

OWN LABORATORY

Mo - Th: 9.30-13.30 & 16.00-20.00 Fri: 9.30-16.30

Avd. Andalucia 157- Torre del Mar Appointments :952 547 251

ESTATE AGENT

Sales, Renting & Insurance C/Infante 23 Edf. Faro I, bajo Tel/Fax: 952 54 70 76 Mob: 658 93 31 87 info@suissehome.com www.suissehome.com

We speak English, German, French Spanish

EASYCARE PROPERTY MANAGEMENT - A X ARQUIA ‘Letting your property - Let us help’

*Weekly Changeovers *Laundry Services *Cleaning Services *Pool Maintenance *Meet & Greet *Key Holding *Welcome Packs

All Property Maintenance Covered

24hr on call

Tel: 696 838 843 / 679 249 868 Different meal of the day EVERY DAY (closed Saturdays) Prices for large or small portions

Excellent German Cusine

Edf. La Habana, Algarrobo Costa Tel: 952 55 00 12 By the swimming pool

ÜxÇáÉÇËá U |áàÜÉ *Lighter bites and a full

*Lighter bites and a full ‘a la carte menu’ Sunday Lunch now being served.

Closed Tuesdays Mention ‘The Sentinella’ when booking an evening meal & receive a free glass of Cava

Brensons Bistro, Canillas de Aceituno Tel: 952 51 80 83 Mob: 663 038 255

Tired of Juggling?

Part Time work for Full Time Income!

The fastest growing international company in the Health & Wellness sector is now seeking to establish a team of 5 key people in the Axarquia region.

Honesty, self-motivation and reliability essential. Full training, high income potential and profit share for the right person.

Contact Miriam Bowen by e-mail:

miriam.bowen@soaringteam.com

D OE S YOUR S E PT IC TA NK NE ED C LE A NIN G?

Call us and we will come & empty your septic tank.

(Certified)

CONSTRUCTIONS & RENOVATIONS

652 65 60 66 Competa, Malaga

E-mail: construccionesschmid@hotmail.com

BAR LOS GIRASOL

Traditional Spanish Menu Next to the Beach On the Promenade between Caleta & Torre del Mar Look for the Black London Cab Open from 11.00am - 12.00pm

STOP SMOKING OR LOSE WEIGHT

No cravings or withdrawal symptoms using latest technology As seen on Richard and Judy & BBC News Safe and harmless. No gimmicks 90% SUCCESS RATE For more information email: moreinfo@stopsmokinginspain.com Tel 952 965 261 / 649 123 238 www.stopsmokinginspain.com

Montessori Nursery

Torre del Mar Calle Laureano Casquero

An introduction to early education for your child From ages 15mths - 4yrs

Limited places available

For more details see website www.torremontessorinursery.com Call: 618 489 503

CLINICA VETERINARIA

Puente Don Manuel

10am-1pm

CLINICA VETERINARIA

Competa

10.30am-1pm

CLINICA VETERINARIA

La Caleta10am-2pm & 3.30pm-8pm

Edificio Al-Zabel, Bajo 3, Cruce de Don Manuel Alcaucin Tel. 951 16 76 66 Urg. 657 582 225 Avda. Torrox, 23 B 29754 Competa Tel. 952 55 33 60 Urg. 657 582 225

Avda. Andalucia, 136 29751 Caleta de Velez (Malaga) Tel. 952 55 10 10 Urg. 657 582 225

Consultations, Analysis, X-Ray, Surgery, Hospitalisation, Home Visits, Microchip, Pet Food & Accessories, Hairdresser, Official Certifications PUENTE DON MANUEL

Second Hand Car Hire

Inge

all about beauty

Fleet of Cars - FULLY LEGAL From 80€ per week all inclusive (With Airport pickup) Minimum 1 week FIRST CLASS SERVICE Call: 952 550 269 / Mob: 618 427 672

hair - cosmetic - make up the first make over shop

TORRE DEL MAR C/ Infantes 23 Tel. 952 967 968 www.allaboutbeauty.eu

ACE POOLS

The Pool Renovation Specialists Call us for a quotation today!

Let us help you to achieve a totally modern pool at a fraction of the cost of a new one. At a very reasonable price we can renovate your old pool to give you a modern, up to date, spectacular pool (0034) 95 253 9465 or (0034) 651 887 394 Construction on the Costa since 1999

A CE P OO L S

HOT OFF THE PRESS

Collect

Iron

Deliver

And Oh !!! so Easy

Call for details on:

666 135 516

Tel: 686 804 959

C/. San Andres, no9. Torre del Mar

“The Urban Oasis in Torre del Mar”

Breakfasts and Cocktails in direct contact with nature Open: 8.30am - 1.30pm / 2.30pm - 02.00am Every Tuesday FREE Salsa classes 9.30pm til late Also Dance Classes in Merengue, Mambo, Bachata & Cha-Cha-Cha Wed: Beginners 10.30pm - Tues: 10.30pm Fri: 8pm & 10.30pm

We speak English & German

PROPERTY MAINTENANCE SERVICES AXARQUIA Brickwork, Roofing, Tiling, Walls, Pools, Terraces, Painting, Plastering from 10€ m2, rendering 18€ m2, Septic Tanks, Depositos FREE ESTIMATES

Tel: 605 710 894 699 401 346

29740

Road opposite Police Station Open: 12pm - 4pm Tues - Sun 8pm - 12am Mon - Sun

95 11 67 289 95 11 67 674

95 11 67 289 95 11 67 674

M ake sure you make the right move & turn right at Venta Baja crossroads to Arkwrights Aladdin’s Cave!

(Nicknamed by all who visit us).

WE WISH ALL OUR CUSTOMERS A VERY HEALTHY, HAPPY AND PROSPEROUS NEW YEAR!

JANUARY OFFER

DUE TO THE CURRENT CLIMATE WE ARE EXTENDING OUR 5% DISCOUNT OFFER ON ALL STOCK TILL THE END OF JANUARY, IN ORDER TO HELP YOU WELCOME IN THE NEW YEAR SHOPPING AT ARKWRIGHTS. (This excludes Newspapers, Magazines, Stamps, Phone cards and any reduced items) ALSO ON OFFER 25% OFF SELECTION BOXES, CHRISTMAS PUDDINGS, CHRISTMAS CAKES, PLUS OTHER CHRISTMAS STOCK THAT MAY BE LEFT.

95 11 67 289 95 11 67 674

95 11 67 289 95 11 67 674

PLEASE BE AWARE THAT OUR HOURS OF OPENING FOR THE WHOLE OF JANUARY ARE 9am TO 6pm, SUNDAYS NORMAL OPENING HOURS OF 10am TO 4pm.

DONT FORGET BURNS NIGHT 25th January FOR YOUR HAGGIS, TATTIES & NEEPS We are stocking Haggis 3.50€, Potatoes .80ct kg and Swede 2.50€ kg. Order yours today.

In January we are due to receive a large selection of Heinz soups for 1€ tin.

Please ring for details.

ARKWRIGHTS FLORIST

EARN SOME BROWNIE POINTS THIS YEAR! DONT FORGET TO ORDER YOUR ROSES FOR VALENTINES DAY, FEBRUARY 14TH, LAST YEAR WE RAN OUT VERY EARLY – DO NOT PUT YOURSELF IN THE DOGHOUSE!!

Vista La Maroma B&B Good rates

Small B&B in the heart of La Vinuela village

2 x guest terraces and dipping pool Group bookings available: All 4 rooms can be booked sleeping up to 10 guests.

(Price on application)

En-suite rooms, all with air conditioning, sat tv and mini-bar.

Tel: 952 519 095 Mob: 666 396 562 E-mail: vistalamaroma26@gmail.com Website: www.vistalamaroma.com

Separate guest sitting room and dining room

Cafeteria, Cocktails & Evening Bar until 2am Open from 8am for Breakfasts

Algarrobo Costa Bau Haufman nr.

Bridge Mezquitilla Algarrobo-Costa end.

24H EMERGENCY DOCTOR 24H CALL OUT DOCTOR 24H AMBULANCE RESCUE 24H AMBULANCE WORLDWIDE 24H AIR AMBULANCE 24H NURSING SERVICE 24H FIRST RESPONDER 24H GPS-TRACKING

Headquarters: Avda. Andalucía, 44, Torre del Mar Tel.: (+34) 952 54 71 45 Fax: (+34) 952 54 06 17

Helibase: Aérodromo Axarquia, Vélez-Málaga Tel.: (+34) 952 54 71 45 Fax: (+34) 952 54 06 17

(Call Out Doctor/Emergency Rescue/Helicopter/Air Ambulance)

24h EMERGENCY 951 28 20 38

ALL MEDICAL SERVICES ARE FREE FOR OUR MEMBERS WITHIN OUR COVERAGE AREA FROM VÉLEZ-MÁLAGA, VIÑUELA, SAYALONGA, COMPETA, FRIGILIANA, ALGARROBO, TORROX, NERJA, LA HERRADURA AND ALMUÑECAR! SINGLE 146,00 EUR A YEAR COUPLES 256,00 EUR A YEAR FAMILY 338,00 EUR A YEAR MAKE YOUR APPOINTMENT AND CALL SIMONE BY PHONE 666 73 74 14

Rescue and Paramedic College and Trainee Centre of Munich

Our Partners: German Red Cross Air Ambulance

WAS 1585â‚Ź

S P E C I A L O F F E R 1 29 9 â‚Ź

Vivero Almunia Opening hours: Mon-Fri 10.00-14.00 & 16.00-20.00. Sat 10.00-14.00 Ctra. Malaga - Almeria, KM 281, El Morche Tel: 952 53 15 75

Attractive small Nursery in a mature garden setting

Owner with long experience of local growing conditions; stocks of shrubs, perennials, indoor & outdoor pot plants, including a good selection of ones that are drought resistant.

Opening hours: Periana Centre 9.30 - 13.30 Cemetery & 16.00 - 19.00 Camino de Moya Periana Tel: 952 53 71 04

Camino de Moya We are here Regalon

Las Yucas, Avda Andalucia 64, Torre del Mar www.casa-terreno.net and www.casa-terreno.com info@casa-terreno2.net and info@casa-terreno.com TORRE DEL MAR

Ref:1632

Lovely studio apartment (42m2) with mountain & sea views, bathroom reformed, fully furnished, community pool, tennis and garden REDUCED

€80,900

TORRE DEL MAR Ref.:1798 Nice furnished studio (42m2), furnished, completely re-furbished, community swimming pool and tennis court, 5th floor with escalator, only 150 m to the beach REDUCED €95,000

TORRE DEL MAR

Ref.:1405

REDUCED

€136,000

Nice flat (88m ) in the centre of Torre del Mar, 2 beds, bath, completely renovated and with parquet floor, big living room, 12 metre terrace, near to the beach.

2

ALGARROBO COSTA Ref.:1734 Very charming and special flat (90m2), fabulous sea views, 3 beds, bath, ff-kitchen,double glazed balcony, total new reformed, nice patio, under floor parking , 20 metres to the beach REDUCED €169,000

Telephone: 952 965 724 :: 649 123 068

TORROX PARK

Ref.: 1660

TORROX

Ref.: 1709

Luxurious Apartment (100m2), only 1 km from the beach, quiet urbanization, marvellous views of sea and mountains, 2 beds, 2 baths, A/C, community pool, big glazed terraces 30m2, separate subterranean parking optional REDUCED €199,000

Fantastic new built villa (92m2), 2 beds, 2 baths, ff – kitchen, fully furnished, huge terrace, south west, big garage.

REDUCED

€275,000

ALMAYATE ALTO Ref.: 1160 Beautiful villa (123m2), fantastic location, south-facing, 2 beds, 2 baths, toilet, A/C throughout, fully furnished, own well, private pool 10x5, f/f kitchen, fenced-in plot, builtin wardrobes, log fire, good access, spectacular sea and mountain views (22,174m2plot). €375,000

ARENAS Ref:1312 Superb villa (165m2) with breath taking views to the Med. and the surrounding mountains (4.500m2 plot), 3 beds, 2 baths, log fire, 4 x A/C, f/f kitchen, double glazing, terraces, pool ,BBQ ,huge garage sep.office room, very high standard, tarmac access, 10 min. to beach REDUCED €499,000

www.casa-terreno.com

www.casa-terreno.net

CASA INDIA Indian Restaurant Food to take away at a discount of 10%

Tuesday - Sunday 1pm - 4pm & 7pm - Midnight Mondays 7pm - Midnight

Tel: 951 707 561 6 70 9 33 4 80 P a s e o Ma r it i m o d e L e v an t e 5 Ed f . A n t il l a s 8 T or re d e l Ma r

SWEENEY TODDZ Unisex Hair Salon Unisex Hair Salon

Catering for all ages & styles ***Special January Offer 30â‚Ź *** Perms/Demi Waves inc. cut & blow dry Wella colour * Special rates *Spray tanning & Ear piercing *Free consultations Nail Technician Required Room available to rent in this busy salon. Would suit Beauty Therapist Tel: S iob ha n 625 138 564 Salon situated under La Maroma, Puente don Manuel Open: Mon - Fri from 10am - late - Sat: 10am - 2pm No siestas - Late appointments available

DO YOU HAVE A VILLA OR APARTMENT YOU WANT TO LET ON THE COAST OR INLAND?

Velez Malaga Large House, 3 Bedrooms, Basement, Garage - 1,200€ p/m Baviera Golf Apartment, 2 Bedrooms, 2 Bathrooms Parking - 575€ p/m Almayate House 4 Bedrooms, 2.5 Bathrooms - 800€ p/m Torre Del Mar Apartment 2 Bedrooms, C.Pool 550€ p/m Torre Del Mar Apartment Studio 350€ p/m Torrox Costa Apartment 2 Bedrooms, C.Pool 500€ p/m Algarrobo Costa Apartment 2 Bedrooms, C.Pool 500€ p/m Torrox Park House 3 Bedrooms, Pool 800€ p/m Torrox Costa Duplex 2 Bedrooms, C.Pool 600€ p/m

Other properties available

If we can assist please call: 952 541 803 / 600 231 116 Email: torreprop@hotmail.co.uk Avda. Tore Tore, (Lighthouse street), Torre del Mar

T 51 el: 7 27 3 95 2

ARTS & CRAFTS CENTRE

0 : ob 02 M 49 1 6 60

Benamargosa

www.la-vaqueria.com

JA N LE UAR TU S FR Y ES OM 1 3 D AY TH

SA

UNIQUE SOUVENIRS HANDMADE GIFTS CRAFTING PRODUCTS ART MATERIALS COMMISSIONS PAINTINGS CRAFT DAYS CLASSES HOMEBAKED FOOD TO TAKEAWAY CAFE

We are at the top of C/Arroyo Limon.

Open Tues-Sat 10am-2pm and Tues-Fri 5pm-8pm Janet & Ken’s Traditional Sunday Roast Dinners Call: 636 734 837 / 626 160 869

Email:info@thefurniturebarns.com

La Vaqueria - Benamargosa

To advertise in The Sentinella call 664 210 468 or email sales@thesentinella.com

.... . .. .. .

Rio Gordo

yo

....

rr o C/A

Cutar

Limon

We are here

To Velez Malaga

HAPPY NEW YEAR

Somehow that has an uplifting ring to it.

Happy New Year signifies best wishes over a longer period of time than say, Happy Christmas, which seems to refer to a specific day. Unless you are religious it has evolved into gifts, food, TV. and family, frequently accompanied by untold stress, worry and a lot of hype which invariably turns out not too badly in the end!

The New Year is for many a fresh beginning, an indication that spring will be along shortly, the days start getting longer and balmy summer nights do not seem so far away!

The Spanish of course have it all off pat with Felices Fiestas covering the lot from imaculada Concepción on Dec 8th – when it is traditional for the women and children to decorate their houses with a Belen (Nativity scene) - through to Christmas, the New Year and Kings Day. Until relatively recently Noche Buena (Christmas Eve) was the main event with a big family meal, Santa Claus had not yet come to this part of the world and children were still getting excited about the forthcoming visit from the Kings on Jan 6th. In our house we always enjoyed traditional English festivities and our neighbours brought gifts

for the children from the Kings. There was never a mix up between the two customs as Father Christmas had phoned the Kings to let them know that we were done! Not a luxury afforded too many Spanish families whose children well understand the benefits of having both! After the excesses of Noche Vieja (New Years Eve) and the excitement of visiting Royalty (Jan 6th) it is understandable that most of us are ready for a well earned rest….not the Mangorinos (natives of Benamargosa) who are now about to celebrate San Sebastian our patron Saint who comes forth to protect the campo from blight on Jan 21st. If you have not yet tried a local fiesta or can still manage yet more merry making come and join in the fun.

This month I would like to send my sincere thanks to everybody who supported our Arts & Crafts Bazaar. The weather was not kind to us and the road was still not there! Your effort was much appreciated. The council have informed me that work on Arroyo Limon will be completed by the end of Feb, not quite in time for our end of January price cuts….

Possibly ready for handmade Valentine cards….but almost certainly finished for the Spring Fair!!!! (Well, we can but hope!!)

If you would like to receive more information on events, classes, workshops or new stock please send your e-mail to studio.20lavaqueria@hotmail.com for a monthly news letter with all of the updates. We wish you all the best in the coming year.

See main advert opposite

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Problem Page with Aunt Sally

Why is my child so shy? (Rachael from Comaras)

explain this to others.

Temperament is who your child is, not something that they choose or that you create.

Think of all the good sides of their personality, sensitive, thoughtful and good with their peers.

Children develop their personality at a young age and their temperament can start to show so parents can begin to see patterns in their child's behaviours that give them clues, but temperament I hope this has given you a little insight becomes more apparent in the toddler into a child’s behaviour and traits and reyears, as your child becomes more ver- assured you that there is nothing to bal and social. worry about, this is who they are.

Low reactor children are quiet and rarely fuss, sleep more than average and show Thank you Rachael little emotion with only slight changes in I like to wish all parents out there a facial expressions and tone of voice. very Happy New Year.

They are content to sit and play quietly Sally Whyte and prefer exploring with their hands www.torremontessorinursery.com than being on the move. They tend to listen and look and take it all in without the need to be up and about. There is nothI R R I G A T E Y O U R GA R D EN ing wrong with this, maybe follow their Are you fed up of spending hours lead take it slowly, encourage them at watering your garden? their own pace. Play quiet, interactive Do you have problems watering your games or get them involved in a turn takgarden when you are out ing activity so they can interact with othor on holiday? ers whilst keeping them engaged.

R E L A X.. ..

Encourage them with physical games All your watering problems can be which will get them moving and help solved by having an them gain confidence. Reading together Irrigation system installed. in a dramatic voice or playing music with Systems fitted with either a standard a beat will help them when they come lever or timer for complete across these in different situations which piece of mind. are unfamiliar to them. Introductions to You need never worry again about new people with the reassurance of you your garden missing a drink.

All tubes placed as discreetly as being close by, let them take a favourite possible. toy or book and use it as a bridge to conFor a chat and a no obligation nect with them. Whenever possible try to prepare your child for new meetings quote please call: ahead of time.

Samuel Parra Try not to label your child especially in 952 514 333 front of them as 'shy' just except they like 666 123 055 to take things slower and if you need to, 70 To advertise call 664 210 468

To advertise in The Sentinella call 664 210 468 or email sales@thesentinella.com Cancer Care Hospice needs quality furniture in good saleable condition (sofas, beds, dining tables/chairs, bookshelves, dressers, armchairs etc etc) anything you don't need, or surplus to requirements, PLEASE don't dump, just ring Tony on... 661 826 654 or 638 108 564. Anything you give, helps us to raise much needed funds for our Cancer Hospice in Benalmadena.

Funny Pics

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SUPERMARKET “SARAH”

Calle Virgin de la Candelaria, Colmenar, 29170 Tel: 625 905 056

OPENING TIMES Mon, Tues, Wed & Fri 10.00-2.00 & 5.00-7.30 Thurs 9.00-2.00 Sat 10.00-2.00

Large selection of Quorn products available Selection of cook in sauces from €2.95

Please come along and visit us, we are in the same road as the local market.

If you do not see what you want please ask and we may be able to order it for you.

Film Review

Quantum of Solace

Starring; Daniel Craig

Quantum of Solace' continues the trepid

you’re like me you even enjoy the not so good ones. So to hell with it and watch it anyway!

adventures of James Bond from 'Casino

Royale'. Picking up literally hours after

Star Rating - ***/*****

the previous film left off, after being be-

trayed by Vesper, the woman he loved,

007 fights the urge to make his latest

mission personal.

Daniel Craig plays the role of James

Bond superbly for the second time, al-

though this version is a more traditional

Bond film.

The emotional side of Bond seems to have died though, and the plot is not as exciting as in Casino Royale.

On a mission that leads him to Haiti, Austria, Italy and South America, Bond finally discovers the culprit, but not without the usual hindrances along the way, including some unexpected twists thrown in by ‘M’ herself.

Although not my favourite Bond film, if 72 To advertise call

664 210 468

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It’s your The correct deciThe Sentinella are giving awaydecision 50 -FREE sion should be obvious by now meals at El Salmon restaurant*, Torre del Mar. Do want you want - You’ll pay for this Guide to women’s vocabulary…

We need - I want

All you have to do is be one of the first 50 people We to talk - I need to complain toneed email sales@thesentinella.com requesting a meal Sure…Go head - I don’t youprinted to and simply takewant the reply to El Salmon . later

I’m not upset Of course upset you eaten with another paying *Meal is a -‘Menu delI’mDia’ when moron For further information call: 664 210 468

Women’s Vocab

I’m not emotional - And I’m not over reacting. I’ve got my period I want new curtains -And carpeting, and furniture and wallpaper…

Do you love me - I’m going to ask for something really expensive

How much do you love me - I did something today you’re really not going to like

diner

I don’t want to talk about - Go awayI’m still building up steam

I’m not yelling - Yes I am yelling because I think this is important

Who said women are difficult to please!

You’re certainly attentive tonight - Is sex all you ever think about Is my bum fat? - Tell me I’m beautiful

You have to learn to communicate Just agree with me Yes - No No - No

Maybe - No

I’m sorry - You’ll be sorry

Nothing - Everything

Everything - My PMS is acting up

Do you like this recipe? - It’s easy to fix so you’d better get used to it

Chinese New Year ***25th January*** Special Menu Open every day (Mon to Fri) 12.00 - 16.00 & 18.30 - 24.00

Menu of the Day 5.90€

Avda. Andalucia,35 Bajo 29750 Algarrobo-Costa (Malaga) Tel: 952 551 439 or 675 230 475

To advertise call 664 210 468

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D RE AM O F E DE N GA R D E N I N G S E R V I C E S

General Maintenance “Water Systems” Fencing Hard and Soft Landscaping

Contact: Don Brown “The Sentinella’s Gardener” 30 Years Experience Phone: 685 584 829 dreamofeden@yahoo.com

Fashion Firsts

Who would have thought it!

1470 - To hide her pregnancy, Queen Juana of Portugal wore the first hoop skirt.

1477 - Anne of Burgundy became the first woman to receive a diamond engagement ring. It was given to her by Maximilian I of Germany.

1874 - Levi Strauss begins selling blue jeans for $13.50 per dozen.

1896 - Brooks Brothers introduces buttoned-down collar.

1913 - Gabrielle “Coco” Chanel opens a boutique in Deauville, France. Her chic and comfortable knit suits usher in the modern era of women's fashion.

1916 - Sneakers are first made in America by the U.S. Rubber Company. They were called Keds.

1923 - The U.S. attorney general declares it is legal for women to wear pants.

1926 - Knee-length hemlines mark a new high in women's dresses.

1922 - The first “flesh-coloured” stock74

ings are sold for women whose skin colour is pinkish-beige. It was another twenty-five years before stockings for brown- and black-skinned women were available.

1930 - Tennis star Rene Lacoste manufactures a tennis shirt that features an embroidered crocodile. It's believed to be the first time a designer logo appears on clothing.

1935 - Bras are made with both cup and band sizes.

1938 - Nylon stockings are invented.

They go on sale in 1940.

1940 - Shoulder bags for women first appeared as part of service uniforms worn during World War II.

1946 - The bikini bathing suit debuts at a fashion show in Paris.

1947 - Christian Dior's glamorous “New Look” features tight waists, stiff petticoats and billowing skirts, ending an era of simple, war-era attire.

1950 - Kiss-proof lipstick hits the shelves.

1955 - Jeans become a big hit with teens

To advertise call 664 210 468

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after the release of the film Rebel Without a Cause.

1960s - Fun furs of acrylic and polyester are made to look like real fur.

1960s - Paper clothes are made for the public. They are disposable and used for underwear and children's clothing.

1967 - San Francisco's “hippie look” catches on throughout the country.

1969 - The Gap opens in San Francisco.

1972 - Nike begins to manufacture sneakers.

1977 - The release of the film Saturday Night Fever sparks the disco inferno.

Polyester leisure suits, pant suits, and shirts fly off stores shelves.

WANTED *Cars *Motorhomes *Plant Machinery *Bikes ANY YEA R ANY REG.

Totally everything considered

CAS H BUY ERS *Embargos No Problem Rick: 653 477 306 Matt: 636 808 268

1978 - Gloria Vanderbilt introduces the first designer jeans.

1980s - The wrinkled look is introduced.

Wrinkles are permanently pressed into fabrics and shirts, vests, blouses, jackets, and pants.

1990s - Counterfeit clothing is made by computer, producing brand-name fakes.

Polo, Guess?, Gap, Banana Republic, DKNY, and Disney are all copied.

1995 - “Casual Fridays” become popular at U.S. companies. Companies allow employees to replace suits with more casual attire, such as khakis, sweaters and polo shirts.

2000s - Celebrites such as P. Diddy and Jennifer Lopez develop and sell their own line of clothing.

Kennels

*Cats and dogs both welcome *Generous sized kennels & runs *Extra large ones for 2/3 family pets *Large, safe, enclosed exercise area *Delivery and collection service *Full grooming service on Sundays *Bath & brush any day by appointment

Wagtails is located within peaceful almond groves, Alhama de Grande

To advertise call 664 210 468

For bookings or more information please call: 655 579792 645 659935 www.wagtails.es 75

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Married Life

Preparing For Married Life. The following is from a 1950’s Home Economics textbook intended for High School girls, teaching them how to prepare for married life…

1. Have dinner ready: Plan ahead, even the night before, to have a delicious meal prepared – on time. This is a way of letting him know that you have been thinking about him and are concerned about his needs.

Most men are hungry when they come home and the prospects of a good meal are part of the warm welcome needed.

2. Prepare yourself: Take 15 minutes to rest so you will be refreshed when he arrives. Touch up your make-up, put a ribbon in your hair and be fresh looking. He has just been with a lot of work-weary people. Be a little gay and a little more interesting. His boring day may need a lift.

3. Clear away the clutter:

CHINESE NEW YEAR ***25TH JANUARY*** Special Menu *Party with music*

Make one last trip through the main part of the house just before your husband arrives, gathering up school books, toys, paper, etc. then run a dust cloth over the tables. Your husband will feel he has reached a haven of rest and order and it will give you a lift too.

4. Prepare the children: Take a few minutes to wash the children’s hands and faces if they are small, comb their hair and if necessary, change their clothes. They are little treasures and he would like to see them playing the part.

5. Minimise the noise: At the time of his arrival eliminate all noise of washer, dryer, dishwasher or vacuum. Try to encourage the children to be quiet. Be happy to see him, greet him with a warm smile.

6. Some DON’TS: Don’t greet him with problems or complaints. Don’t complain if he’s late for dinner. Count this as minor compared with what he might have gone through that day.

7. Make him comfortable: Have him lean back in a comfy chair or suggest he lie down in the bedroom.

Have a cool or warm drink ready for him.

Arrange his pillow and offer to take off his shoes. Speak in a low, soft, soothing and pleasant voice. Allow him to relax and unwind.

Sod the lot of that, hey girls?!!!

Specialities of the House: Crispy shredded Peking Duck, Dim Sum Steamed Sea Bass Special Lunch Menu 5.95€

76

Residencial Costa del Oro Bloque 9 - local 9 Tel: 952 53 46 37 Torrox Costa

To advertise call 664 210 468

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A Christmas Story

A Christmas Story for people having a bad day:

When four of Santa's elves got sick, the trainee elves did not produce toys as fast as the regular ones, and Santa began to feel the Pre-Christmas pressure.

Then Mrs Claus told Santa her Mother was coming to visit, which stressed Santa even more.

When he went to harness the reindeer, he found that three of them were about to give birth and two others had jumped the fence and were out, heaven knows where.

Then when he began to load the sleigh, one of the floorboards cracked, the toy bag fell to the ground and all the toys were scattered.

Frustrated, Santa went in the house for a cup of apple cider and a shot of rum.

When he went to the cupboard, he discovered the elves had drank all the cider and hidden the liquor. In his frustration, he accidentally dropped the cider jug, and it broke into hundreds of little glass pieces all over the kitchen floor. He went to get the broom and found the mice had eaten all the straw off the end of the broom.

Just then the doorbell rang, and irritated Santa marched to the door, yanked it open, and there stood a little angel with a great big Christmas tree.

The angel said very cheerfully, 'Merry Christmas, Santa. Isn't this a lovely day?

I have a beautiful tree for you. Where would you like me to stick it?'

And so began the tradition of the little angel on top of the Christmas tree.

Calle Infante 58a, Torre del Mar

Marble Heating For Floor s & Walls

Selling & Fitting Digital & Satellite TV, Video & Stereo

Repairing Satellite TV, Video & Stereo

Air Conditioning: Winter to Heat up your Home & Summer to Cool it Down!

To advertise call 664 210 468

77

How it all begun

Please mention The Sentinella when replying to adverts Ever wondered how it all begun, this explains all!

On the first day God created the dog and said, “sit all day by the door of your house, drool and bark at anyone who comes in or walks past. For this I will give you a life span of 20 years.”

The dog said, “that’s a long time to bark.

How about ten years and I’ll give you back the other ten?”

So God agreed. On the second day God created the monkey and said, “entertain people, do tricks and make them laugh.

For this I’ll give you a 20 year lifespan.”

The monkey said, “monkey tricks for 20 years? That’s a pretty long time to perform. How about I give you back ten like the dog did?” And God agreed. On the third day, God created the cow and said, “You must go into the field with a farmer all day long and suffer under the sun, have calves and give milk to support the farmer’s family. For this, I will give you a life span of 60 years. ”The cow said, “that’s kind of a tough life if you want me to live for 60 years. How about 20 and I’ll give back the other 40?”

And God agreed again. On the fourth day God created man and said, “Eat, sleep, play, marry and enjoy your life.

For this, I’ll give you 20 years.”

But man said, “only 20 years? Could you possibly give me my 20, the 40 the cow gave back, the 10 the monkey gave back and the ten the dog gave back; that makes 80 ok?”

“Ok,” said God. “You asked for it.” So that is why for our first 20 years we eat, sleep, play and enjoy ourselves. For the next 40 years we slave in the sun to support our family. For the next 10 years we 78

do monkey tricks to entertain the grandchildren. And for the last ten years we sit on the front porch, drool and bark at everyone. Life has now been explained!

The Nerja Hire Centre

***NEW LOCATION*** Long established family run business offering you the following service: LOCAL REMOVALS FULL OR PART LOADS NO JOB TOO SMALL IKEA COLLECTIONS Ring for a no obligation quote.

Come and look at our large display GOOD QUALITY SECONDHAND FURNITURE DOMESTIC HIRE We install BRITISH SATELLITE.

Contact Chris or Jackie: 952 522 687 / 660 962 327 691 552 459

e-mail: nerjahirecentre@terra.es

website: www.nerja-hire.com Ctra. Nerja-Frigiliana, Km. 1-4, Nerja

To advertise call 664 210 468

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Mum-Isims

More great words from the Mothers’ mouths

You had better wipe that smile off your face before I do it for you.

When you have kids of your own you'll understand.

You made your bed, now lie in it.

What kind of a grade is that? You could do much better!

You just ate an hour ago!

Where are you going?

You should have that phone surgically implanted in your ear.

Who do you think you are?

You'd forget your head if it wasn't attached to your shoulders!

Who are you going with? Do I know them?

Who said life was going to be easy?

Why? Because I SAID so, that's why!

You can go out to play...after you've done your homework.

You can't judge a book by its cover.

You could have called.

Practical Jokes

You WILL eat it, and you WILL like it!

You will ALWAYS be my baby.

You're going to put your eye out with that thing!

Your father is going to hear about this when HE gets home!

Thinking of a pratical Joke this New Year. Try one of these!

Prank 1... An old classic.

Place cling film across the toilet bowl and lower the seat.

Prank 2...

Add a thin layer of Vaseline to the toilet seat. Your victim won't know what it is.

Prank 3...

Wait until you're sure the toilet will remain unused for at least 24 hours.

Get 2 - 3 packets of powdered jelly and mix it into the toilet water until dissolved.

Let it set. (The more jelly you use the harder it will set) 80

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Great Book Titles

The ones that were never written

1) How to Choose the Best Lace Doily for Any Occasion Arnold Schwarzenegger

15) Ten Years in the Bathtub Rink Lee Prune 16) Antlers in the Tree Top Hue Goose "the" Moose

2) Attractive Floral Arrangements Sean Connery

17) How to Eat Cereal Poor A. Bowl

4) The Day Hitler Ruined My Barmitsva Ima Jew

19) Being Lonely Shenita Mann

3) How to Make Bush Smart Uca Ant

5) Three Hundred And Twelve Ways To Die By Household Appliance Sue I. Cide 6) The Day I Took Mr. Winky and Threw Him In A Sewer L. Bobbit 7) Household Book of Tools M.C. Hammer

8) How to Project Your Voice Milli Vanilli 9) "Fly Fishing" J.R. Hartley

10) . How to deal with bankruptcy Bill Gates 11) How to Love Everyone Adolf Hitler

12) Late for Work Dr. Wages

13) Kitty's Revenge Claude Balls

14) Brown Streaks Across the Desert Who Flung Dung

18) Smelly Stuff Anita Bath

20) Technology in the 21st century Rob Ott

21) Things Women Can't Do B. A. Mann

MOVE IT!

114. The Sheets Are Wet I.P. Nightly

WITH MARK JOHNSON

R E M O VA L S & L I G H T H A U L A G E

Local, distance, S pa in- UK - U K-Sp ai n REGULAR TR IPS M a n & Va n H i r e Av a il a bl e

...................................

OWNER DRIVER, NERJA BASED, MANY YEARS EXPERIENCE RELIABLE SERVICE .............................................

Call or email for a free quote Tel: 620459908 email: marknerja@hotmail.com

To advertise call 664 210 468

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Special Recipe

Roasted Pork Loin, filled with Wild Mushrooms & Goats Cheese Supplied by El Salmon Ingredients Serves 1

1 x 200g “High Country” Pork Loin Rindless 2 Slices Prosciutto 40g Mixed Wild Mushrooms (Shiitakes, Swiss Brown, Enokkis, Chestnut) 20g Goats Cheese 1 bunch Sage – chopped 25g Crepenette 2 Potatoes (Desiree’s) 1 Leek 20ml Olive Oil 3 Garlic Cloves 1 White Onion – Diced 25g Dried Porcini Mushrooms 60g Butter ½ bunch Thyme 70ml White Wine 200ml Cream 4 pinch’s Salt & Pepper Mix (150g fine salt & 50g ground white pepper) ¼ bunch Chervil 10ml White Truffle Oil Method

1) Roughly chop the mushrooms (25g) & place it into a bowl, add the Goat’s Cheese & Sage, mix them together, set aside until needed.

2) Take the Pork Loin & cut a pocket in the side, fill it with the Mushrooms & Goat’s Cheese mix, then wrap it in the Prociutto then in the Crepenette, wrap in cling wrap.

3)Place a thick based pot on a medium 82

heat & add the Butter (20g), Thyme, Porcini’s & the Onion, Sautee for 2 minutes, then add the White Wine, cook until the wine has reduced by ½, then add the Cream (150ml), turn the heat down to a simmer.

4 )Peel the Potatoes & place into salted boiling water for 20 minutes or until cooked.

5) Place the leeks & the Garlic on a tray & place it into an oven for 10 minutes at 180ºC, when cooked blend until it’s a smooth paste & set aside until needed.

6) Heat a thick based pan with the Olive Oil, when the pan is hot, place in the Pork loin & cook for 2 minutes then turn the Pork over & cook for another 2 minutes, after the 2 minutes place the Pork into the oven for 12 minutes at 180 ºC.

7) When the Potatoes are cooked strain & mash, add the other 40g of butter & the other 50ml Cream, then add 2 pinch’s of the salt & pepper mix, Mix the Potato puree well, then add the Leek puree & mix well again, set aside in a warm place until needed.

8) Sautee the rest of the Mushrooms & set aside, then remove the Pork from the oven & slice at an angle 3 times, place the pork in the centre of a hot serving plate, then place 3 spoonfulls of the Potato/Leek puree around the Pork Loin, Then drizzle some of the Porcini sauce in between the Potato/Leek puree, spoon the other sautéed Mushrooms on to the sauce, Place the Chervil sprigs on top of the Potato/Leek puree & drizzle the White Truffle Oil around the plate.

See main advert opposite.

To advertise call 664 210 468

Superb Daily menu at €8,45 from 1.30pm until 4pm

FRESH LOBSTER AT HISTORIC PRICES

From Thursday the 22nd January until Saturday 24th January Normal price

35€

NOW -40%

21€ Whole Fresh Lobster

Avenida Andalucia 56, 29740 Torre del Mar Tel: 952 965 424 Mob: 629 264 032

Exhibition and sale of rustic hand-ma de material s Eve rything for the hous e a nd garden - all models and sizes av aila ble , columns, tiles for the f l o o r, s w i m m i n g p o o l , s t e p s , w a l l Also lamps, mirrors, dec ora tiv e wa ll plaques for the ba lcony or terrace, and much much more...!

Expl an ad a de Est aci o n 14 Ve l e z M a l a g a Te l : 9 5 2 5 0 8 0 6 0 / 6 5 2 5 7 3 7 5 2 w w w. r u s t i c o s c h a m o r r o . c o m

EXPATRIATE ADVISORY SERVICES ESPANA S.L. (Your peace of mind in Spain)

Tax consultants / Wills Fiscal Representation Conveyancing Residence / Business Permits Insurance Car Importation / Transfers Social Security

Translations / Interpreter Services Secretarial Services Formation of Companies Fax / Photocopying Driving Licence / Passport Renewals Legalisation of Buildings

Special Offer for the months of January & February 20% discount on Wills

C/ Playa Marina, 2C Edif Nautico 88 (next to Supersol) Torre del Mar, 29740, Malaga. Call: 95 254 06 11 Fax: 95 254 06 10 E-mail: info@expat-spain.com / www.expat-spain.com

Top Gear has The Stig Esola has Neil......

C

re enso

d!!

..testing wind power to the limits Esola Sistemas Air Conditioning and Solar solutions. www.esola.es.

Tel: Torre del Mar 616 119 007.

CHILLOW

COOLS YOUR PILLOW...

Get the latest COOLing sleep sensation and get a great night’s sleep For more information please call: 951 904 047 or 664 210 468

Or come & see me every Tuesday at the Country Farmers Market, Trapiche * Free delivery Axarquia only

Clinica Casa Blanca

R

ONLY

30€

Inc. FREE delivery*

...and YOUR HEAD BACK, HOT FLUSHES,SUNBURN, FEET& MORE

Urb. Jardines del Mar, Blq C3 - Torrox Costa (near Garden Centre 1km direction, Nerja)

Do you suffer from back problems, pain in neck or shoulders, tightness in muscles, joint discomfort, migraine or internal ailments?

The BOWEN TECHNIQUE is gentle and works on the whole body for inflammation, illness and pain. The treatment is safe and appropriate for everyone, from newborn babies to the frail and elderly.We also offer massage, lymphatic drainage and other treatments.

Tel: 952 967 628 or 659 374 673 (also home visits) Ask about gift vouchers

4 x 1hour Beginners Lessons only 33€ All equipment supplied

Tuesdays, Thursdays & Saturdays 10.30am til Sunset

Constructions Van Driel S.L.

· NEW BUILD, REFORMS, EXTENSIONS, PLUMBING. · TILING, PLASTERING, PAINTING, ELECTRICAL. · SOLAR PANELS, UNDERFLOOR HEATING, POOLS, ETC…. · PROFESIONAL TEAM WORKING AT VERY COMPETITIVE PRICES. · WE SPEAK ENGLISH, GERMAN, SPANISH, FRENCH & DUTCH. · AND FOR ADVISE AND QUOTATION, PLEASE COME TO OUR OFFICE.

We are just in front of Hotel Mainake (Torre del Mar) TEL: +34 952 96 78 60 MOBILE: +34 696 398 985 FAX: +34 952 545 419 E-MAIL: construc.vandriel@hotmail.com C/Los Prados nº 9 bajo, 29740 Torre del Mar (Malaga)

Ri - Jo

Dutch Bar Sky Sports available Specialities in Dutch cooking Open 10am - late 7 days a week Tel: 696 398 985 Algarrobo Costa (next to swimming pool)

Offer: Kit for free Channel TV from: €390

B a r Tr i a n a

Open Tuesday - Friday 8am-3pm / 5pm-10pm Saturdays 8am-10pm Sundays 8am-7pm English Breakfasts, Hot & Cold Snacks served 8am - 2.30pm Quiz night Tuesdays - 8.30pm start Happy Hour Wednesdays 7pm - 8pm Friday & Saturday evening meals 7pm - 9.30pm Bookings taken for alternative evenings.

Pool table & Bristle Dart Board Sorry closed Mondays LISA & RICHARD WOULD LIKE TO WISH ALL THEIR LOYAL CUSTOMERS A VERY PROSPEROUS NEW YEAR (You’ll find us opposite Discor supermarket in Triana)

Telephone: 618 373 316

Beautiful Holiday Villas

The new portal in Property Rentals & Sales WWW.BEAUTIFULHOLIDAYVILLAS.COM

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C/Canalejas, 15 Local, Velez Malaga 952 55 83 63

Caring dentistry using the safest techniques for your “Health”

EN GLI S H DE N TIS T P R AC TI S IN G HE R E

Dr. MANNISH BDS - London University - Harley St. Cosmetic Dental Surgeon

Dr. ALCAIDE MD - Implantology and Oral Rehabilitation

Complimentary initial examination and digital x-ray (OPG) Compare our quality and standards first

Fo r o ur 1st Annive rsary, we’ v e go ne c raz y!!

S i ng l e i m p l an t o n l y 5 00 € wi t h U ni d e n t a ls ’ s unique 3D aided s urgery (off er until 31st Janua ry) W o ul d n ’ t it b e fo o lis h n o t to h a v e a s e c on d o p i n io n ?

To advertise in The Sentinella call 664 210 468 or email sales@thesentinella.com Get Quizical

Puzzle Page

1. Which sea is also called The Sea of Tiberius?

2. In which famous novel does Catherine Earnshaw appear?

3.What is deuterium oxide also known as?

4. In which year did General Gordon arrive in Khartoum?

5. What type of creature is a Junco?

6. In which country was artist Edvard Munch born?

7. Which chemical element has the symbol V?

8. How many pennies was the English silver coin a groat worth?

9. If you kvetch what do you do?

10.In biology if something is acauline what does it lack?

Hey Diddle Riddle

1. Which triangle has a bigger area: a) A triangle with sides measuring 300, 400, and 500. b) A triangle with sides measuring 300, 400, and 700.

2. A man was going to buy a 5,000â‚Ź car, but he didn't pay a penny for the car, how is this possible?

3. What has roots as nobody sees. Is taller than trees, up, up it goes and yet never grows?

4. Romeo and Juliet are found dead on the floor in a bedroom. When they were discovered, there were pieces of glass and some water on the floor. The only furniture in the room is a shelf and a bed.

The house in is a remote location, away from everything except for the nearby railway track. What caused the death of Romeo and Juliet?

5. There are four girls, and four apples in a basket. Every girl takes an apple, Yet one apple remains in the basket.

How is this possible?

Sudokus

Answers on bottom of page 108

To advertise call 664 210 468

91

Whats on...? Sponsored by: Please mention The Sentinella when replying to adverts

ARKWRIGHTS The British Store & More OPEN ALL “OURS”

Puente don Manuel

Call: 95 11 67 674 / 95 11 67 289 / 65 93 75 603

www.arkwrights-groceries.com

Lux Mundi, Torre del Mar January Events 14th - Trip to Granada & Sierra Navada 15th - Film Night 18th - 25th Week of Prayer for Christian Unity 26th - Talk about Jazz.

For further information call in at the centre Avenida Moscatel No. 1,"I", Torre Del Mar or tel: 952 543 334

RBL - Trapiche Branch Meets on Wednesdays between 12.00 & 14.00 at El Trapiche Restaurant where you will receive a very warm welcome and meet some of our 80 plus members.

3rd - Christmas Fayre at El Trapiche Restaurant. 5th - Gibraltar SOLD OUT 10th - Social Meeting at El Trapiche Restaurant. 11th - Christmas Dinner /Dance at El Trapiche Restaurant. 3 course meal with wine. Live entertainment with Alan Moulton 17th - Branch Meeting and Monthly Lunch at El Trapiche Restaurant.

For more information, or to book call Helen Vivian on 952 519 736 or Jayne Turner on 951 167 092. Or at El Trapiche any Wednesday between Noon and 1pm

RBL - Los Romanes Branch meets every Tuesday at Paccos Pizzeria, Cortijo Romero, Lake Vinuela (formerly Ziggis Bar) from 12.30 until 2.30pm. A warm welcome awaits all members and new members too.

Any enquiries please telephone Margaret on 951167600.

ABC Ballroom & Sequence Club, Ballroom, Latin American, Sequence and Fun Dances. Thanks to everyone for supporting me, next dance is a Special New Year dance. January 10th at El Trapiche, 7.45pm til midnight. Seems 92

like all have enjoyed themselves at the dances and I look forward to seeing more and more beginners as well as experienced dancers. This is not just dancing but a great social evening. Hope everyone has a wonderful Christmas and a very Happy New Year to all.

Please let us know your menu requirements at least 1 week before the dance.

Special......Valentines Day dance 14th February, book early. Keep dancing. For further information on dancing lessons and future dances contact: David 952 531 259 or Jacine jacine@gonuts4free.com Tiffany's bar Puente Don Manuel, Spanish conversation classes. Beginners Tuesday 10am and 11am. Beginner's Wednesday 10am and 11am.

Intermediate Friday 10am and 11am.

Please call Loli on 619717166 for more information

Colmenar Gym, fitness/pilates classes, weight/circut training, fully equiped gym.

Contact Carol 659 295 346 email: carolgrant2@tiscali.co.uk

Dovestones Trio, Vocal Jazz and Pop every Thursday at 11.00pm in “SABOA”, Torre del Mar (opposite the tram station), Call: 627 398 511 for details.

Come Dancing with Hugh Grant: Salsa, Rumba, Cha Cha, Swing, Hustle.

Contact for location nearest you. hughgrant@tiscali.co.uk 606 086300.

El Valle Players’ next production a one act comedy play "The Boyle family Holiday" will be on January 29th and 31st, the venue is Bar el Trapiche, Trapiche, tickets will be on sale at 10 euros each to include a chicken and chip supper.These can be obtained from Marjorie 952519720 or Joan 952033153.

El Valle Players are aways looking for new members,anyone interested can contact Jenny on 680680183,so come along and join in the fun.

Morenos Bar, Sunday nights jammin night from 7pm, Cruce de Periana, Puente don Manuel.

To advertise call 664 210 468

To advertise in The Sentinella call 664 210 468 or email sales@thesentinella.com

Whats on...? Cont...

RBL - Torre del Mar Branch meet every Wednesday, 12 noon at La Vega Restaurant, nr the Mercadona Supermarket, Torre del Mar. January 2nd – Panto at Salon Varieties 5th – 3 Kings Parade in Malaga 9th – Shopping trip to Gibraltar - €10 for all 12th – Monthly lunch 14th – Sewing circle 17th – Rock ‘n’ Roll night 20th – Greenfingers Gardening Group 23rd – Visit to Almunecar & the Chicken Shack for lunch in Orgivar 29th - Bowling at Ozone, El Ingenio Centre 31st – Theatre Supper with El Valle Players For bookings please ring 663658354

RBL - Alcaucin Branch meet every Thursday noon at Caramels (at Chiringuito Antonio) to enjoy social activities and meet new likeminded friends. We regularly have a quiz, bingo, surprise events and presentations. Caramels provide us with a wonderful multi choice lunch for which most of our members choose to stay.

Regular trips are arranged departing locally. Jan 8th Welcome Back Social Meeting and Quiz Jan 15th District AGM in Torremolinos and Social Meeting at Caramels Jan 21st Ten Pin Bowling at El Ingenio Bowl Jan 22nd Social and Branch General Meeting Jan 29th Spanish Wine Presentation plus Tasting (Small cover charge)Feb 2nd Treasure Hunt with optional Lunch. A very warm welcome will be made to all new fun loving members.

Branch Contact is 696 391 224. Harvey. Social Contact is 677 866 008 Ann. Welfare Contact is 690 310 951 Dorothy RBL- Benajarafe Branch Meet every Friday from 12.30 to 2.30 pm, at the coastal, Puerto Niza restaurant, we enjoy bingo, quizzes, more entertainment and monthly outings, a superb lunch inc. drinks*, and we welcome all new and existing RBL members. For more information please ring: 952 514 226 or 669 201 927

Cudeca Events, for details call: Laura

Haggis 952 564 910 or 692 256 375

Nerja History Group. Meets on the first Friday of every month at our new venue, Nerja Cultural Centre, Calle Granada.

Meetings start at 11.30 prompt and finish at 13.30. For more info. please contact Jill Chtristian-Smith on 664 760 405 or jill.christiansmith@gmail.com

CAS Events November: 5th January Coach trip to Malaga to see the Three Kings procession. Coach departs Monica Hotel, Nerja, at 3.00 pm. Time for a meal. Tickets 20€ (Members 16€).

15th January - 17th January - Indian Night at The Haveli Restaurant, calle Cristo, Nerja, at 7.30pm. An amazing sumptuous buffet of Indian food with wine and water, and entertainment from Andy Time. Easy parking available behind the restaurant. Tickets 22€ 21st January - Quiz Night at Camaleón Bar, Burriana Beach, Nerja. 7 for 7.30 pm. Includes supper. Entrance 8€ in advance or 10€ on the night.

25 January - Cómpeta Quiz Night at La Roca, Cómpeta. 7 for 7.30pm. Entrance 3€. Food available. Raffle and prizes.

TO RESERVE: Please telephone the CAS office on 95 252 3607 (10am – 1pm). Out of office hours, call Vera on 95 252 9670 / 630 003 450 or Sheila on 630 003 473.

All coach trips pick up in Nerja at Hotel Monica, Supermercado Iranzos, Hotel Nerja Club, Hotel Marinas bus stop and at the Torrox roundabout.

Full details at www.casnerja.org Bar Viva, C/Dr Maranon, Torre del Mar, Quiz night every Thursday from 8.30pm with cash prizes. APARIV Charity Quiz last Friday of every month. Call 952 544 362

Come Dancing for CUDECA on January 24th at El Trapiche restaurant. 7pm for 7.30pm with the usual choice of chicken, fish or vegetarian supper. Price 10 euros.Contact Joyce: 616 046 713 or Mike: 952 510 189 or email: jjmunns@gmail.com

To advertise call 664 210 468

93

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Information

...In our own random order!

Emergency Numbers Police Municipal: 092/952 549 238 National: 091/952 542 000 Fire: 952 558 091 Velez 952 500 000 Torre Ambulance: 061 Water: 952 540 662 Electricity: 952 540 662 Red Cross: 952 500 321 Hospital General Basico de la Axarquia, Torre del Mar: 951 067 000

Bus Times Telephone: 952 540 936 Nerja-Malaga 06:30*, 07:30, 08:30** 08:55, 10:10, 11:10, 12:25, 13:40, 14:55, 15:55, 17:10, 18:40, 19:40, 20:25 Malaga-Nerja 07:00, 08:15*, 09:15, 10:30, 11:45, 12:30**, 13:00, 14:00, 15:15; 17:30; 18:45, 20:15, 20:45**, 21:30 Expect to pay approx 2.90€ one way and 5.15€ round trip Nerja-Nerja Caves 08:10, 08:25, 09:40**, 10:40, 11:50; 11:55, 12:35, 13:10, 13:35, 14:25, 15:25; 16:40; 18:10**, 18:55, 19:30, 20:10 Nerja Caves-Nerja 08:45, 10:00, 11:00, 12:00**, 12:15, 12:50**, 13:30, 14:45.

15:45, 17:00 17:45; 18:30; 19:30; 20:15 Expect to pay approx 0.80€ one way Nerja-Torre see Nerja-Malaga times Torre-Nerja 07:45, 09:00, 09:15***, 10:00, 11:00***, 11:15; 11:45**, 12:30, 13:15, 14:45, 16:00, 17:30***, 18:15, 19:30, 21:00, 22:00.

Church services in English Anglican Nerja - San Miguel Church 11:30am Sundays Competa - Holy Communion every Sunday at 5.30pm in the Parish Church, Plaza Almijara, Cómpeta Malaga - St George's Church 12 midday Sundays Torre del Mar - Lux Mundi Centre 09:30am Sundays ANGLICAN communion.

94

Alhama de Granada - St. Barnabas IERE (Anglican). English services 11 a.m. Sundays at Meson Diego, Plaza de la Constitucion. Tel.958359388 (priest) or 952 510 921 (churchwarden) St Barnabas IERE (Anglican). English services 11 a.m. Sundays at Iglesia Evangelica, Torre del Mar, opposite the bus station. Tel.952030461 (priest) or 618640132 (churchwarden)

Roman Catholic Torre del Mar - Lux Mundi Ecumenical Centre, Saturdays 5pm, (Winter), Saturdays 6pm, (Summer)

Church of Scotland Lux Mundi Ecumenical Centre - Worship every Sunday at 11:30 Tel 952543334 or 687764705 for more information.

Evangelical Torre del Mar Evangelical (Presbyterian Church) Now meets every Sunday for Worship in English at 11.30 in the Picasso Room of the Hotel Torremar, off Paseo Larios, C/ Saladero Viejo 15 Torre del Mar. All welcome. Minister J. Hartsmith Foy Tel 952532825 Puente don Manuel - Fellowship of the King, Sunday Worship - 11am Tuesday Fellowship - 7pm (Prayer time 6pm) We meet at Fellowship of The King premises Our new address is:- Fellowship of The King Venta Baja Road (next BLOCK up from Meson Sara) Puente don Manuel, Alcaucin. Phone: 952 518 185 or 952 033 021

Bank Hours Usually 8:30am-2pm except Sundays, Bank holidays and Fiestas.

Please note, the majority of banks will not accept bills to be paid (ie: electric, phone, rates) after 11am.

Taxis Torre: 952 540 016.

Nerja: 952 520 537 Velez Malaga: 952 540 016

To advertise call 664 210 468

To advertise in The Sentinella call 664 210 468 or email sales@thesentinella.com

Information

Taxis continued...

Puente Don Manuel: 952 510 992 Mob: 616 034 636.

Shops 10am - 2pm - 5pm - 8:30pm (generally) The municipal market (fruit and veg) and the weekly markets are only open mornings.

Weekly Market days Mondays:: Torrox Costa & Market at Caramels, Puente don Manuel Tuesdays: Nerja & Country Farmers Market, at Jardines del Trapiche on the road to Benamagosa.

Wednesdays; Rincon de la Victoria & Algarrobo Costa Thursdays:: Velez Malaga & Torre del Mar & Frigilana Fridays: Cala de Moral Saturdays: Caleta de Velez & Competa Sundays: Malaga Consulates UK Opposite the main bus station Edif, Eurocom Bloque Sur C/Mauricio Moro 2-2ยบ- Malaga 952 352 300 Ireland Avda, de los Boliches, Nยบ15 Fuengirola 952 475 108 Netherlands/Dutch Avda, Carlota Alesandria, 33 Edif. San Andres - 1ยบ-7 Torremolinos 952 380 888 Germany C/Mauricio Moro 2, Malaga 952 363 591 Sweden 952 604 383 France 952 226 590 / 952 214 888 Belgium 952 559 159

Denmark 952 211 797

Airports Malaga 24-hour information 952 048 484 or 952 048 804 Granada 952 048 804 Airlines www.easyjet.com www.ryanair.com www.thompsonfly.com www.flymonarch.com www.flybe.com

Telefonica Dial 1002 to report a fault on the line. For general enquiries dial 1004

Tourist Information Nerja: 952 521 531 Torre del Mar: 952 541 104 Water Supplies Velez Malaga: 952 506 450 Nerja: 952 520 154 Malaga: 952 135 013

Railway Stations Malaga: 952 360 202 Granada: 958 271 272

Town Halls Torre and Velez: 952 500 100 Torrox: 952 538 200 Nerja: 952 548 400 Competa: 952 516 006 Rincon: 952 402 300 Malaga: 952 135 000

Hospitals Nerja Ambulatorio: 952 523 131 Velez Malaga: 951 067 000

ITV 902 575 757 or 952 551 084 www.itvcita.com - Open Mon - Fri 08.00am - 18.45pm, Sat: 08:00am 12.45pm

To advertise call 664 210 468

95

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The Trade Page

Do you have something to sell?

Email thesentinella@yahoo.co.uk before 15th of the month. FREE for items less than €1,000 and just €10 for items over €1,000. Bargain!

FLOOR POLISHER, complete in box, unwanted housewarming gift! 100€.

CERAMIC, FAN ASSISTED, electric oven & hob. Excellent condition, Competa area, Call: 618 104 623 or 638 854 279

OVEN GRILL/BAKE, Tefal Twenty.L Fan assisted, Worktop model, fully equipped. Good condition in full working order. 40€.

MITRE SAW, Manual, benchtop 14TPI precision blade 15/30/45/90 degree settings for picture frames, architraves, skirting etc... Hardly used, in original box. Great for the Handyman. 40€ Tlf: 952 505 427 (Velez) YAMAHA KEYBOARD, with stand 250€ Call: 952 033 155

WOOD BURNING STOVE with glass front door. Good condition, would need to be built into a fire place 125€. Telephone Ivan on 951 160 093

SADDLE `WESTERN` as new. A beautiful 18” leather & Suede Saddle.190€ o.n.o IDEAL GIFT, as new gold chain, chunky & thick. 185€ o.n.o. Call: 951 167 375 or 662 097 051

CREAM THREE SEATER leather reclining sofa, as new, Bought 950€ offered at 550€ CREAM LEATHER reclining massage chair, bought at 300€ offered at 150€.

Buyer collects, Competa. Email: angelinajohnp@gmail.com for photos

TWO PLATE RACKS. Each hold 12 plates plus hooks for 6 mugs/cups. 25€ each or 40€ for the two.

LARGE WOODEN TABLE. Made from chestnut wood. Seats 8/10. Ideal for indoor or outdoor. A bargain at 240€. Call: 952 508 998 96

FOR SALE SECOND HAND kitchen L shape bottom cupboards plus 1 row of top cupboards. Any offers considered must collect from Malaga centre. Call: 639 120 707

FRIDGE..GAS..made by taver.. large fridge and good size freezer compartment. Can deliver if necessary. Cost new 800€. Now 350 GENERATOR..YANMAR diesel, electric start. 6,9 kilowatt output. 240 volt and 120 volt sockets. Enough to power a house and more. On wheeled cradle.

Offers around 950€. Can deliver.

GAS FIRE, suitable for caravan or mobile home, needs flue and underfloor airvent. 50€. Can deliver. Call 629 624 461

GENERATOR, PETROL, herculese 5500st. New in bauhaus around 800€ sell for 450€. 3 16amp 240 volt outlets and 1 32 amp 400volt outlet. On wheeled cradle, could deliver. Call: 676 906 431

DARK OAK CHEST of drawers (VERY) high quality build) 3 drawers, 1m x 45cm x 70cm. 450€ new only want 60€ for quick sale.

Call 660 076 681

WALK IN FREEZER / FRIDGE 2 metre x 1.50 metre HOT CABINET SERVEOVER 1.50 metre COLD SERVEOVER 1metre for more information please call: 609 108 759

Wanted

WANTED STAMP and postcard collections, Please phone Ray on 952 532 507 WANTED NEW MEMBERS at El Capitan Tennis Club Torre del Mar. Monday, Wednesday and Friday mornings 9.30 11.30. Phone 675 391 967

WANTED MATHS TUTOR needed for 15 year old attending Spanish school.

Must be able to teach using the Spanish method. Contact Carol on 659 295 346

To advertise call 664 210 468

To advertise in The Sentinella call 664 210 468 or email sales@thesentinella.com

PRIVA TE SALE SECTION

Advertise your house, villa or apartment for sale or rent here...

From just 10€ per month!

Vehicles under 1,000€ free!

Call now: 664 210 468

sales@thesentinella.com

Cars for Sale

MOPED (MOTO) - MINELLI SPORT, 49cc, Reg Sept 06, hardly used with under 1000km on clock, red & white in colour, Vinuela area. 499€ Tel: 649 328 338 or 951 321 524 -----------------------------------------------------NISSAN TERANO 4x4, Spanish Plates, LHD, 2.4 petrol 95, 7 seats, Aircon, electric windows, central locking, VGC, only 2,900€ o.v.n.o. Call: 951 167 375 / 655 279 043 / 662 097 051 -----------------------------------------------------1993 ROVER 216 GSI. Grey metallic.

Right hand drive / Spanish plates. Full service history. 11 months ITV remaining.

It maybe old but it is reliable and very well maintained by it's current lady owner.

750€. Call: 95 132 1166 or 630 560 983.

----------------------------------------------------MOBILITY SCOOTER "Pride Legend" two speed roadgoing with range of 40 kms in excellent condition. Cost 3200€

new. Price 600€. Please ring Phil on 952 550 628 or mobile 678 490 331 (Caleta de Velez)

VOLKSWAGON GOLF 1.9 TURBO DIESEL L.H. DRIVE 1996/NOV 5 DOOR HATCH 45 miles per gallon, P.A. Steering New cam belt, clutch, tyres, etc. (phone for details) Radio/CD player, Alloy wheels, Fully serviced, Excellent condition inside & out Needs Spanish registering hence

2,500€

Contact: 951 167 397 or 663 726 265 or email: dorian.f.hill@gmail.com

Property Sale/Rent

STATIC CARAVAN ABI 8m x 3m, 2 beds, sleeps 6, Bathroom, Kitchen. Ideal for Caravan Park or self build.

Excellent condition, 7,000€.

Call: 650 605 002

2 Bed Apartment in Alcaucin For Sale Completed in Dec 2008, Fitted kitchen and bathroom, Dining room, Balcony, 2 communal pools, underground parking and storage. lovely location.

Please email: fionamw900@aol.com or ring 01258 451021 for further details.

170,000€

Or sensible offers invited

To advertise call 664 210 468

97

Apartments for rent

Please mention The Sentinella when replying to adverts

Short or Long Term Cont act:

666 310 158 INVESTMENT OPPORTUNITY IN SIDCUP, KENT, ENGLAND £124,950 1 Bedroom purpose built flat *Communal Entrance *Lounge, Kitchen *1 Bedroom & Bathroom *Communal Gated Parking *Double Glazed *20 mins London/WestEnd/City *Low Maintenance £100 p.a.

Ground Rent £50 p.a.

Rental Income in region of £550 - £600pm N o Forw a rd C ha in Ea r l y V i e w i ng Ad vi se d .

F o r v i e w i n g o r f ur th e r d e t a i l s 0034 675 391 967 0044 208 303 3531 www.your-move.co.uk

POSSIBLE EXCHANGE CONSIDERED

98

TORROX COSTA

*TWO STOREY WOODEN CHALET FOR SALE IN VERY GOOD CONDITION ON A SECURE SITE

*1/2 bedrooms *fitted kitchen *bathroom & lounge *Fully furnished with air conditioning *Satellite system *Internet connection *Garden shed *Car parking space and a pretty veranda with seating area *use of communal pool MUST BE SOLD AT 35,000€ Telephone Denise on 679336811 to view

Business for Sale

KENNELS BUSINESS WITH VILLA. Great opportunity. Beautiful 3 bedroom, 2 bathroom property being sold with a well established business. This very unique combination can be found in the countryside surrounding Mondron about 10 mins from the ever growing village of Periana.

The current owners have spent a lot of time and consideration "getting it right" in the development of the Kennels. The dog/cat area is well known in the area and further afield - the existing customer database speaks for itself. The repeat business is very reassuring and the annual income not to be ignored. It is really worth viewing and seldom will such an opportunity be repeated. Call 649 320 055 for further info.

------------------------------------------------------The Sentinella Mojacar edition is up for sale!

Launched and developed by Keidi Keating and a friend from March ‘08 to the current date. Now with between 52-60 pages.

Covers the area from Mojacar to San Juan on the coast (Almeria region) and inland to Albox, Huercal Vera, Bedar, Antas, etc..

Editors want to start new ventures. A great business opportunity. For price and further details call Keidi on 610 976 284.

To advertise call 664 210 468

G R E AT I N V E S T M E N T O P P O RT U N I T Y I N G R A N A DA C I T Y 301,000€

G R E AT I N V E S T M E N T O P P O RT U N I T Y I N VELEZ DE B E N A U DA L L A ( G R A N A DA ) 139,000€ Apartment for sale in Urbanización

Las Terrazas del Jardín Nazarí.

6 1 , 4 0 m 2 O f f i c e f o r S a l e, Construction finished in November l o c at e d i n t h e h e a r t o f 2008 and due for signing of Title Deeds with the developer.

G ra n a d a , C / S a n A n t ó n , Splendidly complete exterior N o. 8 0 , E d i f i c i o R e a l C e n t e r, apartment located on the last 3 floor n ex t t o S a n A n t ó n H o t e l , building, comprising of 2 bedrooms, l ounge, kitchen, bathrom and private 1 s t f l o o r, O f f i c e n o. 7 , solarium on the terrace roof. It also i n c l u d i n g t w o c a r p a rk s, includes car parking and storage room. Swimming pool, gym and N o s. 1 4 5 a n d 1 4 6 . communal Arab baths.

Suzuki Jimny 4x4 Cabriolet 2002, FSH, Lady Owner 58,000km Hard Top, A/C, E/W, C/L, Alloys Very Good Condition & A Great Price Only 6,999€ Tel: +34 647 590 566

Offer of plots with Sea Views From 250€/m2 + IVA Tel: 649 87 73 46

BE SAFE COSTA DEL SOL

FOR A PROFESSIONAL INEXPENSIVE CHIMNEY SWEEPING & MAINTENANCE SERVICE

Telephone: Russ Heath

654 184 242

Based on Ancient Knowledge & Techniques

Treatment for: *Phobias *Physical Pain *Stress Mobile: KENNEDY 630 792 368 EFT PRACTITIONER kennedygoldsmith@yahoo.co.uk

Home visits ANYWHERE Please phone for more information

IDLE HANDS TATTOO STUDIO And Traditional British Barbers & Nail Bar With over 18yrs experience Hairdressing, Waxing, Face Shaves, Facials Mon - Fri 12pm - 8pm Sat Appointments only El Penoncillo, Torrox Costa Tel: 656 752 990

699 86 44 31 pool Ball s pole es & d i l S

Velez Malaga Cafe Qua lified Staf f

Offering a great variety of entertainment in a modern and pleasant centre.

Rental of inflatables & other attractions to celebrate your birthday, communion or other events with “BADY” our mascot!

Pol. Ind.”La Panoleta” Camino “El Higueral” 23, Velez Malaga

School of Languages

SPANISH COURSES

NEW LOCATION!!

DON’T MISS US... info@bemidiomas.com

www.bemidiomas.com Camino viejo de Malaga, 12C - Velez Malaga

952 54 92 33

CHIMENEAS TEHISU RAFAEL VARGAS

Whatever measurement the space is, we fit custom-made, exactly your wood-burning stove & cast-iron chimneys.

Avd. de Segovia 4, Urb. El Castellano, 29700, Velez Malaga 952 50 79 64 / 689 77 92 10 Menu del Dia Mon-Fri 12 - 4pm FREE House Wine (Min table of 4) with this advert (Ex cep t wi th Men u de l D ia)

Avda Andalucia, Blq. Jupiter, Pasaje Timon 2, C/ Timon, Torre del Mar Tel: 952 547 798 Open: 1pm - 5pm and 7pm-1am every day www.theguidetospain.com 10% off take aways

“Clinton & Geoff welcome you” Food served all day All live football shown, 4pm kick-offs Sats Fridays “Light of India” Curry Nights 10.30am - late Mon - Sat Sun 10am - 7pm Paseo Maritimo 43 Torre del Mar (opposite tennis courts) Tel: 659 132 579

CONSTRUCTION & HIRE Time served NHBC Builder with 40 years experience in Construction POOLS, EXTENSIONS NEW BUILDS, BRICKWORK TILING, PLUMBING ELECTRICAL SEWAGE & WATER TANKS PLASTERING CONCRETE & STONE WALLS MATERIALS SUPPLIED MACHINE HIRE (with or without driver) Ask to see our work Parajae Los Rosajes S.L. Alcaucin English: 696 547 646 Spanish: 636 219 689

NEW LOCATION! THE MECHANICAL DOCTORS We have moved to a bigger and better premises!!

MECHANICAL GARAGE

REPAIRS TO ALL VEHICLES

4 X 4 & LIGHT COMMERCIALS RECONDITIONING OF ENGINES & GEARBOXES

To Velez

PICK UP & DELIVERY de C/

Peugeot

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a Fr

To Vinuela

QUICK SERVICE FOR OIL, BRAKES & CLUTCHES

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A-356

INDUSTRIAL ESTATE A-7

To Torre

Eroski

To Nerja

HAND CAR WASH PRE ITV ( MOT )

PRESENT CAR FOR ITV CAR & VAN HIRE

TEL: 951 28 44 26 MOB: RAYMOND 672 112 998 MOB: MICHAEL 671 758 375

mechanical_doctors@yahoo.co.uk medicos_delautomovil.es

CALLE de FRANSISCO de GOYA POL. IND. LA PANOLETA VELEZ - MALAGA

If you are looking for horse riding in Nerja, look no further

Located on the picturesque Rio Seco ll in Nerja and consisting of 3 very large outside paddocks, 5 stallion size indoor stables, a dressage size sand school, separate wash area, quarantine corral and children’s play area. We also have a bar area, toilet and shower facilities.

Horsin’ Around

Offers riding lessons for all levels, from complete beginners to experienced riders and tailoring rides to suit individual needs. We can also cater for families or groups of friends.

(For groups of six or more, advanced notice is required). A one hour lession is 25€ (one to one).

(Discounts are available for regular bookings)

Horsin’ Around

Has a pony club on Sunday mornings for children between the ages of 10 & 14. The lessons are not only educational about caring for horses, learning how to tack up, but also how to ride safely and confidently, whilst having fun.

On Saturday mornings, we have a smaller group of 3 children from ages 6 to 9. Parents are welcome to come, watch and enjoy the beautiful surroundings.

(Discounts are available for regular bookings).

Horsin’ Around

Also offers a full range of livery services from DIY through to a full service.

Whatever your needs, we can accomodate you and your horse For further information please call Claire on 629 880 480 or visit our web site at www.horsinaround4u.com

THE MOSQUITO SCREEN C O M PA N Y WITH A MANUFACTURING FACILITY INTRODUCING 2 NEW MOSQUITO SCREENS TO SPAIN

THE MAGNETIC INSECT SCREEN

Top of the range 100% insect proof Magnetic seal allows simple window operatio PVC Frame fastens to window or brickwork Easy to fit or remove for cleaning Suitable for domestic & commercial applications For the DIY enthusiast, this screen can be ordered and comes with easy to follow manufacturing and measuring instructions in English

THE ALUMINIUM HINGED SCREEN

A simple but very effective screen Powder coated decorative profile

Suitable for Internal or External applications Also American style swing doors

NOW AT THE INDOOR FARMERS MARKET TRAPICHE EVERY TUESDAY

At the Mosquito Screen Company, we now manufacture all types of screens, from Aluminium Sliders, Roller Blinds and the above. We also deliver to the trade and public within 3 days of order.

NOW INTRODUCING: Aluminium Double Glazed Windows & Doors Balcony Enclosures in Double Glazing or Mosquito Screening

We also guarantee we will not be beaten on price or quality.

For more information or free quotation, please call: Te l / F a x : 9 5 2 5 7 3 5 7 7 690 29 6 952 / 63 8 499 140 or 6 65 392 299

To advertise in The Sentinella call 664 210 468 or email sales@thesentinella.com

Star Signs

Mystic Mag starts all over again to tell you what’s new for January 09…

Capricorn The moon has moved in to your ‘good for nothing’ chart and it will remain that way for most of the year in fact. Hard cheese!

Lucky sign – A ray of sun Aquarius You are planning a big move, but make sure you wait until the moment is right as otherwise disaster could loom.

Lucky sign – Tick Tock

Pisces This year you want to get married, but first you must find a partner that can endure you throughout the years ahead.

So get looking.

Lucky sign – Speed dating?

Aries Be careful of your money this month. It doesn’t grow on trees, so it’s no good pretending that it does. And in any case, all trees wither from time to time.

Lucky sign – Fruits Taurus If the pen has run out of ink then buy a new pen. It’s really not that difficult.

Lucky sign – A new pen (lid and all)

Gemini If you want to fix it then it must be broken. Don’t try and fix something that isn’t broken, as that won’t work in the law of all averages.

Lucky sign – Glue

Cancer Education is the key to success so why not check out what long distance learning courses are available to you as you fizzle your lifeless days away.

Lucky sign – Learning something (anything…)

Leo Don’t get too excited too soon, as excitement is a very clever feeling, that doesn’t like to show its face too much. Best off to be less excited and feel the calm.

Lucky sign – Yo man!

Virgo Everything that happens for you in January is really, totally meant to be. It will all just unravel, as if it was waiting all along for the right time to happen.

Lucky sign – Cotton reel Libra Nobody likes being wrong, least of all you Librans. But unfortunately we all are from time to time and it’s your turn.

Lucky sign – Wrong with a capital W

Scorpio The year bursts into action for you Scorpions and sets the scene for the whole of 2009.

Lucky sign – Vroooooom

Sagittarius – I’m not picking up anything for you Sags this month. That either means that nothing much is going to happen at all, or it’s out of my radar.

Lucky sign – Aliens

And if it’s your birthday this month Happy New year!

To advertise call 664 210 468

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Jokes he he he :-)

A Primary Teacher explains to her class thanking him for the lager. As he lets go, that she is a Liverpool fan. She asks her the man's eyes widen in shock. students to raise their hands if they too 'Strewth mate, the bad back I've had all are Liverpool fans. Everyone in the class my life is completely gone! It's A Miracle.' raises their hand except one little girl. Jesus then approaches the Scouser The teacher looks at the girl with sur- who says, prise and says, 'Mary, why didn't you 'Back off, mate, I'm on disability benefit. raise your hand?'

---------------------------------------------------'Because I'm not a Liverpool fan,' she A married man left work early one Frireplied. day, but instead of going home, he spent The teacher, still shocked, asked, 'Well, the weekend partying with the boys. if you are not a Liverpool fan, then who When he finally returned home on Sunare you a fan of?' day night, his wife really got on his case 'I am a Man Utd fan, and proud of it,' and stayed on it.

Mary replied.

After a few of hours of swearing and The teacher could not believe her ears. screaming, his wife paused and pointed 'Mary, why, pray tell, are you a Man Utd at him and made him an offer. 'How fan?' would you like it if you didn't see me for 'Because my mum is a Man Utd fan, and a couple of days?'..... my dad is a Man Utd fan, so I'm a Man The husband couldn't believe his luck, Utd fan too!' so he looked up, smiled and said, 'That 'Well,' said the teacher in an obviously would suit me just fine!!' annoyed tone, 'that is no reason for you Monday went by, and the man didn't see to be a Man Utd fan. his wife.

You don't have to be just like your par- Tuesday and Wednesday went by and ents all of the time‌ What if your mum he still didn't see her. was a prostitute and your dad was a Come Thursday, the swelling went down drug addict, what would you be then?' a bit and he could see her a little out of 'Then,' Mary smiled, 'I'd be a Liverpool the corner of his left eye. fan.

---------------------------------------------------Police cordoned off Liverpool City Cen---------------------------------------------------An Australian, an Irishman and a tre this morning when a suspicious obScouser are in a bar. They're staring at ject was discovered in a car. It later another man sitting on his own at a table turned out to be a tax disc. in the corner. He's so familiar, and not recognising him is driving them mad.

They stare and stare, until suddenly the Irishman twigs: 'My God, it's Jesus!'

Sure enough, it is Jesus, nursing a pint.

Thrilled, they send him over a pint of Guinness, a pint of Fosters and a pint of bitter. Jesus accepts the drinks, smiles over at the three men, and drinks the pints slowly, one after another. After he's finished the drinks, Jesus approaches the trio. He reaches for the hand of the Irishman and shakes it, thanking him for the Guinness.

When he lets go, the Irishman gives a cry of amazement: 'My God! The arthritis I've had for 30 years is gone. It's a miracle!'

Jesus then shakes the Aussie's hand, 108 To advertise call 664 210 468 Hey Diddle Riddle Answers 1) A triangle with sides measuring 300, 400, and 500. The other triangle cannot exist!, 2) He didn't pay a penny, he payed 5000â‚Ź for the car!, 3) A mountain, 4) Romeo and Juliet are fish. The rumble of the train knocked the tank off the shelf, 5) One girl took the basket.

She took the last apple while it was in the basket.

Get Quizical Answers 1) The sea of Galillee, 2) Wuthering Heights, 3) Heavy water, 4) 1884, 5) Bird, 6) Norway, 7) Vanadium, 8) 4, 9) incessantly complain,10) A stem

The Sentinella Business Directory WE CAN LIST YOUR BUSINESS HERE FOR JUST 5 EUROS A MONTH!

CALL TODAY ON: 664 210 468

ACCOMMODATION

Escuela la Crujia Rural B & B & guesthouse in a pretty converted school, 10 minutes from Velez Malaga,Tel: 606 010 580.

Email: toni@escuelalacrujia.com Vista la Maroma Rural B & B La Vinuela Tel: 952 519 095 Mob: 666 396 562 E-mail: vistalamaroma26@gmail.com Website: www.vistalamaroma.com Accommodation.com. 50,000 Cheap Hotels Online. www.accommodation.com

AIR CONDITIONING

Maraverclima, C/Verdemar 2, Local 5, Torre del Mar, Malaga. Call: 952 54 40 99 / 658 955 751

ALLOTMENTS

Allotments for rent in Velez Malaga. 20 euros per month for 50 square metres. Close to El Ingenio shopping centre and Velez Malaga centre. Gardening tools available for use. Parking onsite. Come and join us - grow your own veg and save on your shopping!

Call Jose on 639120707 Email: galbraith76@yahoo.com

AWNINGS

Shademaker Awnings Enjoy the Al Fresco life style without burning to a crisp! Hundreds of choices of material, styles and models to suit all tastes. Also specialising in material changes to your existing awnings.

Save money... Pay in Sterling!!!

Call Craig on: 637 058 478

BOOKSHOPS

Pasatiempo Calle Infantes 30, Torre del Mar, 952 543 703, www.bookshoppasatiempo.com

BRITISH SUPERMARKETS

Arkwrights English Shop. Turn right at Venta Baja Crossroads or call: 95 11 67 674 or 65 93 75 603 www.arkwrights-groceries.com

BUILDERS

Milton Construction - 20 yrs experience in all types of construction from routine maintenance and repairs to new builds, pools, landscaping.Tel:625 348 406 for free estimates.

Professional Building Services 34 years in Building Trade Kitchens made or Just Fitted Reform, Extensions,Painting.NO JOB TOO SMALL FREE QUOTE call Garry or Olly Tel: 655279043 / 951167375 / 664156095 Spanish family builders for reforms, new builds, walls, pools etc. Good reputation with clients and known well in local town halls re: permissions etc. English speaking answering service. Please telephone: 660 144 402.

CAFETERIAS

Lolita Beach Cocktails & evening bar til 2am. Open from 8am for breakfasts. Bau Haufman bridge Algarrobo Costa

To advertise call 664 210 468

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CAR AND VAN RENTAL

One way van hire, UK, France and Spain. Call: 952 541 147

CAR DOCUMENTS

Registration, importation change of names (transferencia), driving licenses changed from english to spanish.

Tel: 952 21 21 01 & 952 51 19 66

CARS WANTED

Wanted all UK plated vehicles. Year 2000 onwards. cash paid. Call: 667 235 205

CARPENTERS

Andrew Rodgers 20 years experience in kitchens, wardrobes, shelving, aluminium door & windows. Call the Window Doctor for any window problem. Roller shutter blinds, mosquito blinds, security locks, repairs and renewals reasonable rates, Tel: 660 597 894 email: rodgersfamilyinspain@yahoo.co.uk Cabinet Maker & Designer all aspects of carpentry including kitchens, windows & doors, Dave: 686 307 769 Madercobrita Poligono la Panoleta, C/Juan Gris, Velez Malaga, 952 501 543

CARPET & UPHOLSTERY CLEANING

Call Roy on: 958 640 068, Professional Machines, Best prices, Distance No Problem. 16years experience.

CATERING

Food For Thought Catering offering fantastic quality food at competitive prices.

Please phone us on 952 554 249 or 600 783 870 or visit our new website at: www.foodforthoughtcateringinspain.com for more information.

CHILDCARE

Montessori and NVQ Early Years qualified (to level 4), experienced at working with children and young people of all age ranges.

I am looking for work as a nanny/babysitter, also school pick up and after school care in the Nerja area to Torre del Mar areas. References, C.V and certificates available. Call Rebecca on: 699 021 583 or email: rebecca.whale@gmail.com

CHIROPODISTS

Registered Chiropodist/Podiatrist offering a complete footcare service in the comfort of your own home. 15yrs experience

110

NHS & private. Call: 636 866 715

CLEANING SERVICES

Sunshine Cleaners for a sparkling clean result, daily, weekly or monthly visits. Also change overs and keyholding service. Give us a call on 639 583 400 M&M Cleaners in Competa and surrounding areas, cleaning all the way down to the coast. call the reliable ladies on: 952 553 729 or 647 145 628 Clean & Rosie - Private cleaning undertaken on villas and apartments, including windows, ironing and laundry. References available. Call Rose on 685 245 516

COMPUTERS

PCTORROX.COM. All computer problems solved. Torrox/Nerja and surrounding areas.

Free Advice. No Fix No Fee. Hardware ,Software and Website solutions. PC service only 50 Euros. Call Rab on: 952967124 or 645236259.

Computer tuition and repairs Problem solving. Patient and professional. Call David on 952 549 607 or 654 899 976.

Computer supply & repair service. Wireless net installation & security. General IT problems solved. Computers built to price or spec. Tuition for beginners & advanced users - Lessons in your home. Call Paul: 952 55 75 65 / 663 70 26 91 Computer Problems? Help is at hand. Upgrades, repairs, hardware and sofware problems solved, NO FIX - NO FEE. Advice on buying and setting up the right computer for you. Tuition from complete beginners to advanced, get the most out of your PC. Call David Fleck on: 952 510 729 / 620 328 382 or email: technophobe@orange.es

CURTAINS

Curtains/Blinds/Cushions/Bedding etc All Professionally made to measure, alterations undertaken, call for free estimate, 630 414 429 or 952 519 151

DAY TRIPS & WALKS

Door to door service from Nerja or Competa for a maximum of 4 people to Granada, Cordoba, Ronda and more. For more info: http://www.sheilaspanishwalk.com/sheilasspanishwalks_039.htm Call Sheila on: 952 512 684

DENTISTRY

Unidental. English Dentist Practising Here C/Canalejas, 15 Local, Velez Malaga. Tel: 952 55 83 63

To advertise call 664 210 468

To advertise in The Sentinella call 664 210 468 or email sales@thesentinella.com

DOG BOARDING

Dogs - Home from home, boarding at my 10,000sqm finca in Rio Gordo. Offering a personal service where dogs live as family.

Call: 678 189 019 or e-mail: riogordo@mail.com www.homefromhome.weebly.com.

Also within 15km daily home visits for dogs, cats, horses etc...

DOMESTIC ENGINEER

Domestic Appliance Engineer From Ariston - Zanussi Your kitchen appliances professionally repaired, 25yrs experience with major UK Company, Tel Mick: 616 370 539, email: mick.griffiths@hotmail.com

ELECTRICIANS

Electro-Cute! English J.I.B. Electrician For all your electrical needs and problems Fault finding/Lighting and power/Air conditioning Electric gates and Intercoms/Pumps Rewires/Upgrades Call Stefan 610048919 electrocutster@gmail.com Lakeside Property Services, 24 hour call out emergency Electrician and Plumber.

Call David on: 627 931 357

ELECTRICITY CARD METER

Electricity Card Meter, Control electricity costs, set your own tariffs ideal for Air conditioning, pool pumps or whole house. Simple installation, 2 year guarantee. Only â‚Ź99 inc. programming card and 20 pre paid cards.

952 546 597 / 664 210 048 / info@esola.es

ENGLISH/SPANISH MOBILE SECRETARY

English/Spanish mobile secretary available by the hour or by the day. Tlf: 661 335 628 / 952 970 980

ESTATE AGENTS/REAL ESTATE

Ab Ax Properties Colinias del Puerto 124, Avenida de Andalucia, Caleta de Velez, 952 511 103, www.abaxproperties.com Axarquia Properties SL 952 554 235 or 626 038 851, www.axarquiaproperties.com Fleming Properties, Calle Las Melosas, Edf Nautico, Torre del Mar, 952 547 131 or 637 278 306, www.fleming-properties.com

FASHION

For fashionable jewellery, decorative brastraps and beautiful handbag hangers

and more visit www.wedobling.com or call 645 614 749,

FURNITURE SHOPS

Carousel Second Hand Furniture, Vinuela Pueblo (Under Cajamar Bank), access via steps at side of bank, or slip road behind bank, 630 211 907 The Furniture Barns, Tel: 686 734 837 www.thefurniturebarns.com Email: info@thefurniturebarns.com Country Furniture, furnishings, accessories and much more. Our website shows the latest stock or visit us La Vaqueria in Benamargosa. Top of Calle del Arroyo Limon between the Coviran supermarket and Casa Axarquia.

Open 10-2 & 5-7 Tues - Fri & 10 - 1 Sat. Cudeca Second Hand Furniture Shop, tel 952 545 212 Calle Infantes 48, Torre del Mar (by Thursday market) open from 10.00 to 16.30 Mon to Fri and 10.00 to 13.30 Sats.

For donations of furniture please call Tony on 661 826 654.

GARDENING SERVICES

Red Palm Beetles, Processionary Moths.

Call us for treatment and disposal of these garden problems. Tel: 657 165 373 Garrick Welch Gardening and general maintenance, Torrox, Nerja and surrounding areas. Also tiling, painting and small building works. Hourly rates, references available, no job too small. Friendly reliable service. Enquiries: 664 226 509 / 690 848 951 / 952 539 674 or email: av_gaz@yahoo.ie

GUITAR LESSONS

Professional Guitar Lessons, hire of guitars available, Alcaucin area.

Tel: Tina 666 135 516

HAIRDRESSERS

Blades - 20 years experienced mobile hairdresser & nail technician for acrylic nails.

Call: 691 621 198

HEALTH & BEAUTY

Weight Control - Herbalife Independent Distributor, Bea Savory, 95 253 4795 Email: beasav@terra.es (business opportunity also available) WeightWatchers Meetings in English.

Nerja, Velez and Torrox. Call Candace on 952 549 607 or 626 672 493 for further details.candace.edwards@weightwatchers.es

To advertise call 664 210 468

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Skin problems? Unwanted moles, warts or blemishes? Dr Suzanne Wildman-Chard can help improve your appearance with state of the art equipment and 30 years experience in the UK. Also treatments available for depression & chronic pain. Friendly affordable & initial consultation without charge. Tel Dr Suzanne on 952 725 415 or mob 678 117 894, www.wildman-chard-centre.es / e-mail: dr-suzanne@wildman-chard-centre.es Yoga, Health & Beauty Centre, 52, Calle Silla, Campillos, Malaga Free product list from Energy Mountain suppliers of high quality natural health supplements and energy boosting products to the Axarquia area. Our herbal and nutritional preparations are obtained from well established sources and many have been used with our patients for more than twenty years.

We are constantly researching new products especially those which raise the vital energy of the body. We deliver free of charge to Puente Don Manuel, Trapiche Market, Comares, Velez Malaga, Arenas, Torre del Mar, Nerja. and the UK. For full product list and advice please contact us at: Energy Mountain. Tel: 01916451911 (UK or Skype) Mobile/Text: 626046238 (Spain)email: energymountain@hotmail.co.uk

680 751 868 House Clearance & Removals. All items considered, cash payable on collection. Fast & Reliable service. Call Paul: 626 160 869

Villas to Let Privately owned luxury villas to let. Contact Christine: 627 820 669 www.villaslet.com

KENNELS AND CATTERY

HOLIDAY LETS

HORSE RIDING

Andalucia Horse riding, 1hr, 2 hr or day rides with picnic or bar lunch. Situated close to Lake Viñuela Also riding holidays with accomodation. Tel: 616 032 215, www.andaluciahorseriding.com Pony Riding, Main road Torrox-Competa between km 13 &14. Call: 626 836 736 Professional International Horse Rider Trainer, UK qualified, available for lessons, schooling etc.. Call Tina: 666 135 516 Los Caballos del Puente, Horse riding in the area around Lake Vinuela. One hour 20€, two hours 30€. Call: 697 594 824

HOUSE CLEARANCES

M & S House Clearances, best prices, anything considered! Also man with van for removals and transportation. Call 952 037 762 / 669 454 791 / 952 553 189 or 652 325 387 House & Garage Clearances. Car Boot stock wanted. Fair prices paid. Call:

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INSURANCE

LCJ INSURANCE, Not the cheapest, Not the dearest, Almost certainly the best, *Health Insurance, * Travel Insurance - Multi trips, *Car and House Insurance, * Funeral Plans, Call: 952 515 224 MAPFRE Insurance: Specialising in health, home, vehicle, business & life insurance. Range of pensions & investment plans. English & Spanish speaking. Call Victoria Hardin for a no-commitment quote.

952 555 212, fax: 952 551 640 or email: vhardin@mapfre.com All types of Insurance available with Spains leading Insurance company Mapfre.

We also offer highly competitive rates for transfering currencies anywhere in the world.

English speaking service. Please telephone: 660 144 402 or e mail us at fairportinsurance@yahoo.es

INTERNET SERVICES

Riosat:SL, No landline required. Internet and telephone services. Some areas free installation. Call 951 239 310 / 626 679 018 Email:info@riosat.com Website:www.riosat.com The White House Kennels. Well established, professional holiday home for Cats and Dogs. Each kennel has it’s own indoor accommodation and outdoor run, as well as a communal 300m2 exercise area. Each cattery has an upstairs and downstairs, with toys designed to stimulate and entertain. All securely set within the peaceful countryside setting of Mondron, within a 10 minute drive from Periana. For bookings or to view call: 649 320 055 or email: thewhitehousekennels@yahoo.co.uk This business is for sale.

LAUNDRY SERVICES

3-J's Campo Laundry Service Your Laundry Washed and Ironed. We Pick up and Drop off. Everyday is a washday for the 3-J's. Torre, Vinuela, Colmenar and inland. Julie 699 349 748

LAWYERS

Carmen Silvia, Solicitors Abogados, Span-

To advertise call 664 210 468

To advertise in The Sentinella call 664 210 468 or email sales@thesentinella.com ish solicitors, English Spoken, Torrox Costa, Urb. Costa del Oro local 8, (very near Notaria Office). Free initial consultation, 952 967 004 Email: carmensilvia@telefonica.net International Law Solutions. English speaking Spanish Lawyer. English and Spanish legal advisors. Urb Torrox Park, Zona Comercial 3, 952 527 831 or 615 338 139, info.ils@hotmail.com

MACHINE HIRE

Machines for hire, for all your building & reform requirements, with or without driver.

Call: 696 547 646, on road to lake.

Saxon SL JCB Digger Hire. New machine Good rates. Velez Malaga Call: 678 23 22 53 or 662 39 83 72

MASSAGE (THERAPEUTIC)

George Donker, massage, sport injuries, pain alleviation, stress therapy. Practice: 952 555 206. Mobile: 626 198 238, Caleta de Velez, 10 treatments half price.

MEDICAL CENTRES

Centro Mar y Salud offers good professional care and treatment in a friendly and healing environment. Our centre not only emphasises diagnosis and cure but also promotes maintaining your health and feeling good. We offer a range of practitioners and treatments; General Medicine, Psychology, Physiotherapy, Osteopathy, Obstetrics, Massage, Acupuncture, Gynaecology, Cosmetic surgery, Urology, Iridology, Colontherapy, Pedicure, Photo depilation, Yoga Classes, Gym classes.

Paseo Marítimo, El Morche/Torrox Costa, 952 532 065 / 617 913 196, www.centromarysalud.com.

MIDWIFE

Karen Fagan Independent Midwife registered with Colegio de Enfermeria Malaga & NMC London.Homebirth,waterbirth,birthing classes,breastfeedingsupport. Antenatal & postnatal care.Clinics held El Morche Centro Mar y Salud.TEL : 952 532 065 / 606 911 240 for appointments. www.costaguide.net/karen-fagan

OPTICIANS

Heiko Stumbeck, Avda Andalucia 119, Torre del Mar, 952 967 923 and C/Antonio Ferrandiz "Chanquete" 23-25, Nerja, 952 528 395. C/Jacinto, Benavente Edf. No. 6, Fuengirola, 952 197 565

PAINTERS & DECORATORS

Painting, Decorating & all minor repairs.

Also villa changeovers, reliability and high quality work at a reasonable price. Phone Ian or Vanessa, 951 167 711 or 678 265 022 Puente don Manuel, Brush Strokes. Rooms painted from 60€ (i.e) one coat white) Villas painted from 300€ Tel: 686 307 769 or 639 738 624 Painter & Decorator, all aspects covered Interior & Exterior including paint effects, High Quality service at affordable prices, also Rendering and General Maintenance, Tel: 696 716 786 for Free Quote.

Painter and Decorator Interior and Exterior, Rejas and Gates, Woodwork, Paint Effects, Low Prices, High Quality, Free Quotes also General maintenace. Tel: 696 716 786

PALM TREES

Palms, trees and plants of all kind. For example: Wasingtonia Palm tree, 3m trunk 395€. Call Jeanette for further details, prices & info, as well as wholesale on: 659 110 165 or email: elpoli@web.de

PET COURIERS

Pet Taxi- UK, France & Spain Delivered door to door. Call: 667 235 205

PHYSIOTHERAPY

Sanne H. Mortensen, BSc (Hons), MCSP, SRP, Spanish registered, Col no 2066. Clinic appointments or home visits in the Axarqùia region. Experienced UK trained physiotherapist offering post-operative rehabilitation and general musculo-skeletal conditions.

Tel 626 152 756

PLASTERERS

Fully qualified plasterer. For all your plastering requirements & any other building work undertaken call Darren Izzi on: 626 439 850

PLUMBERS

24hr plumbing, drainage & all gas appliances, call 666 123 055 / 648 806 016 / 952 514 333

PRINTING

Business Cards Flyers / Menus / Posters 1000’s of graphics. Black & white or colour.

Design / Print / Laminate. Telephone Jackie: 952 534 947 Mobile: 625 928 600 Email: jackdavetorrox@hotmail.com

To advertise call 664 210 468

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PROPERTY MAINTENANCE

Property maintenance Villa Care: For your Holiday Rental Property we provide cleaning, laundry, welcome pack, key holding, security checks, pool cleaning, gardening, painting, general maintenance and call out service.

Established 5 years with references available. Tel. David or Rebecca Francis 649328338 or 629538142 or 951321524.

Pool cleaning. Experienced reliable couple for pool cleaning/maintenance and property change overs for letting, including cleaning & laundry. References available.Vinuela area. Call Keith or Carol 659724265 or email fincaanna@hotmail.com Property Care, for cleaning, gardening, general property maintenance. Reliable service. Refs available. Call Denise or Dave for friendly chat on 616 869 429 Doctores de la Casa, We revitalise your property for re-sale or rental. Property or room makeovers, Property Management, Pool & Garden Maintenance, Guest Services. Call: 657 247 647 or email: doctoresdelacasa@gmail.com AxarCare™ Property Management and Maintenance Services. A full range of property maintenance services carried out by professionals, Building, Painting, Electrical Work & Plumbing the one stop solution. Property Management Specialists a very comprehensive service, Including professional pool cleaning, full details on the AxarCare website. Axarcare we take care of all your property needs. Company Website: www.axarcare.com Tel :616-809-423

REMOVALS

Move It, Removals & Light haulage Nerja-based, Call or email for free quote: 620459908. Email: marknerja@hotmail.com Ramsey Douglas. Removals UK Spain UK. Part & Full loads. Secure Storage. Local Removals. Well established, professional, family run business. For friendly advice & quotation - (0034) 952 115 322 w w w. ramsey douglas .com Man and Van (high top). €22 per hour.

Reliable and friendly service. Call Paul: 626 160 869

RENTALS

Tenants-All types of rental,holiday,long/short term lets etc.,Owners - Make sure I know about your property, Please ensure you have contacted me so that I can help you.

Tina 0034 666135516 or Email: officespanishmanagement@yahoo.co.uk www.spanishmanagement.com

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Rent a Home Avenida Andalucia, 133, Torre del Mar. Call: 952 547 554 or 680 210 414. Email: info@rentahomespain.com website: www.rentahomespain.com 4 / 3 bed 2 bathrooms, Canillas de Aceituno. Fabulous villa with independent guest annexe and stunning views across the countryside, lake and mountains, Garage, private pool for long-term rent 695 Euro p/m tel: 951167603 billandheather@hotmail.co.uk

RESTAURANTS

Taj Mahal ( Torre del Mar ) Avda. Anadalucia, Blq. Jupiter, Pasaje Timon 2, C/Timon.

Tel: 952 547 798

SATELLITE T.V.

Total Satellite Installations Call Phil on: 629 556 266. Email:philbraid@hotmail.com Sky Shop Torre del Mar. Call: 667 235 205 or 952 541 147 Sat. Co. Sky and “Free Sat.” HD. Call us 7 days a week. Call Tom on: 657 484 853

SOLAR POWER

Tecnicas Maro, Heating, Cooling & Solar Energy. Providing energy saving solutions since 1992. www.tecnicasmaro.com Email: info@tecnicasmaro.com. Tel:952 52 95 38

SOLICITORS

C&D Solicitors Specialists in Real Estate, Civil and Tax Law. Tel: 952 532 582 www.cdsolicitors.net or email: info@cdsolicitors.net

SPANISH SERVICES FOR EXPATS

Spanish services for Expats if you need help with translations, dealing with the Spanish system, locating and negotiating with tradesmen, improving your Spanish, visits to the town hall, hospital etc.. Call us 661 335 628 / 952 970 980

WEB DESIGNERS

Spanglish Webs, Web designs, Data Base Programmes, Hosting, Domains, Menu Designs, English - Spanish Translation. All at realistic prices.

Contact Rachel: spanglishwebs@gmail.com or telephone: 691 660 187 Website:www.spanglishwebs.com

JUST 5 EUROS PER MONTH To advertise call 664 210 468

Avenida Andalucia, 133, Torre del Mar

(Opposite the BP Garage just behind the “Once Kiosk” Just around the corner from the Thursday market)

Tel: 952 547 554 or 680 210 414

WE URGENTLY NEED MORE PROPERTIES; CLIENTS WAITING Torre del Mar Ref 1239 Beautiful f/f large house 50m from the beach Spacious 4 floors with double garage 995€ pm Rent to Buy

Caleta Ref 1456 Large 4bed, 2bath, house Furnished or Unfurnished Lovely views with garage 895€ pm Rent to Buy Torre del Mar Ref 1324 6 bed, 5 bath, F/F. Private Pool, a/c, sat t.v.

INTEREST FREE MORTGAGE AVAILABLE

1495€ pm

Rent to Buy

Linda Beach Ref 1189 2 bed 2 bath villa furnished to high std Communal Pool a/c sat tv lovely views 595€ pm Short/Long term

WITH RENT A HOME SPAIN YOU ARE DEALING WITH A FULLY LICENCED , REGISTERED , INSURED S . L . COMPANY TO GIVE YOU TOTAL PEACE OF MIND .

www.rentahomespain.com / info@rentahomespain.com

PRICED TO SELL!!

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Los Romanes

A modern villa of some 175m2 on an easily managed € 0 plot of 550m2 0 5,0 9 with pool on the ED UC edge of the D RE village. Landline telephone and mains gas.

FP0544 255,000€

Los Romanes

A unique three bedroom reformed house in a quiet cul de sac with a € second site utilised 00 0 , 50 as a 60m2 terrace ED C offering DU uninterrupted RE views over Lake Vinuela to Mount Maroma.

FP0366 135,000€

A 4 bedroom, 3 bathroom villa of some 130m2 with 8m x 4m pool on a gently sloping plot of 6,800m2 enjoying tremendous southerly views to the sea and northerly views to the mountains

249,000€

A fully reformed townhouse with roof terrace close 00€ to all amenities in 0,0 5 D the town. Partial CE DU aircon, telephone, E R sky t.v. and to be FP0226 89,500€ sold fully furnished

Periana

Benajarafe

A large 4 bed villa of 224m2 on a 1,000m2 plot in a well established € urbanisation.

0 00 Mature gardens, 00, 1 double garage, 8m ED UC x 4m pool, D E R extensive private terracing and sea FP0529 550,000€ views

TORRE OFFICE Calle Playa Marina, 2D Torre del Mar. 29740 Tel: 952 54 71 31 Mob: 606 087 362 NERJA OFFICE Calle El Barrio, 11 Nerja. 29780 Tel: 952 52 41 40 Mob: 637 278 306