28 | March 27, 2019
DIVERSIONS
ultravires.ca
Platonic Ideal of Law School vs Actual Definitely not a day in the life of this writer… HONGHU WANG (2L) 7 AM: Ideal: Wake up. Hit the gym while catching up on the news of the day. Actual: Sound asleep. 8 AM: Ideal: Get back from the gym. Shower. Have healthy breakfast of scrambled eggs and whole grain toast. Make smoothie for commute to class. Actual: Still sound asleep. 9 AM: Ideal: Head to the library. Sit by big glass windows. Drink coffee. Brief cases for 10:30 AM class. Use colour-coded highlighters to mark important passages in casebook (yellow for issue, green for facts, blue for reasoning, pink for conclusion). Actual: Still sound asleep. 10 AM: Ideal: Head to class early for a seat in the front row. Cup of coffee: full. Smile: beaming. Actual: Wake up 30 minutes after class begins. Swear and throw on yesterday’s clothes that were on the floor. Frantically scramble for a pair of mismatched socks. Stumble to class. 11 AM: Ideal: Volunteer insightful questions to the prof, e.g., What does Justice Iacobucci really mean in Fraser River Pile & Dredge Ltd v Can-Dive Services Ltd, [1999] 3 SCR 108? Actual: Open and close Facebook about twentyseven times. Start a new game of Words with
Friends with your friend beside you. Browse blogTO and Toronto Life. Browse Reddit. Browse Imgur. Open Facebook again. Tag your friend in Dogspotting posts. Fawn over cute doggos you will never be able to pet. Wish you had a pupper. Try to pay attention in class and tune out when the professor starts talking about clerking for Justice so and so at the United States Court of Appeals for the Second Circuit.
12 PM: Ideal: Grab meal-prepped lunch from student fridge and eat it in the library while briefing for afternoon class. Actual: Find day-old pizza in the trash. It doesn’t smell too bad. Eat it. Some friends ask to go to the bar for a beer. Go to the bar. Have more than one beer. 1 PM: Ideal: Schedule fifteen minutes to chit chat with small-group friends. Consider applying to the Law Review. Apply to the Law Review. Actual: Have a nap in the basement. 2 PM: Ideal: Afternoon class. Take meticulous colour-coded notes by hand (blue for reading notes, black for class notes, red for review). Eagerly underline conclusions so summaries will go faster later that day. Actual: Skip afternoon class. Head home for a nap. 3 PM: Ideal: Actually pay attention in class and continue to take notes. Upload notes for accessibility services
(sharing is caring). Actual: Wake up. Play Skyrim. Wonder if you can play Skyrim for the rest of the day.
4 PM: Ideal: Have informational interview with a BigFirm LLP summer student over coffee (hold the sugar, please). Wonder if public interest jobs can pay enough to pay down debt from $40,000 tuition. Actual: Heat up some day-old bread and smear with Nutella. Some Nutella dribbles down your shirt. Wonder how life came to this. Schedule time to cry later this afternoon. 5 PM: Ideal: Have deep conversation with a friend about difficulties and stresses of law school. Support each other. Access mental health resources. Have a positive attitude toward mental health. Actual: Browse YouTube. Watch Tasty videos while eating more toast with Nutella. Your friend cancels dinner plans with you. You are secretly happy. 6 PM: Ideal: Complete household chores. Water and prune bonsai tree. Meditate. Call mother and have a pleasant conversation about how her tulips are growing in. Fit in a quick 5K run. Actual: Play more Skyrim. 7 PM: Ideal: Log your run on Strava. Give kudos to friend who just ran their first half marathon. Take another shower. Eat a healthy dinner of broccoli,
brown rice, and tofu. Actual: Still playing Skyrim.
8 PM: Ideal: Log all the hours you’ve spent in class or studying today (you are one hour short of 8-hour daily target). Read and brief cases for tomorrow’s class. Actual: Still playing Skyrim. 9 PM: Ideal: Finish reading for class. Start submitting a piece for Ultra Vires. Check your email and be happy about interview with Law Review. Consider trying out for competitive moots. Actual: Still playing Skyrim. 10 PM: Ideal: Write hand-written letter to best friend who moved to B.C. for medical school. Eat some kettle chips (your guilty pleasure) while watching Big Brother (the new season is perfect). Read a chapter from Stephen King's 11/22/63 (you try limit screen time right before bed after you read it in a newspaper somewhere). Marvel at Mr. King's literary genius. Write journal entry. Actual: Still playing Skyrim. 11 PM: Ideal: Go to bed for eight hours of sleep. Actual: Still playing Skyrim. 12 AM: Ideal: Getting some well-deserved zzzs. Actual: Still playing Skyrim.
