1996-97_v19,n19_Imprint by Editor Imprint

Friday, November 22, 1996

Volume 19, Number 19

CDN Pub. Mail M u c t Sales Agmment No. 554677

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Verona Beach, the neon and bright-cobured gaudiness of a Miami bexhfbnt is fiont and cenm.

The Moneagucs, dressed in SoCal surfer chic, and the Ca ulcts, in their finest Gino sty a,whip around the garish city in their &-up musde cars. wi out theto ad troubles of Helicopter shots and ra id-& uyingtomodtrnizethesctcing. editing combined to give $,film D h r Baz Luhrmann a fervour rarely found in to put all ofthe pieces togcthtr m Shakespcarran~nnaf~cc~. this latest adaptation ofRancoand m b i i p r o b h Eating Jwlitt, in what amounts to a p e r k t thismovic,andthe Murynason mxation fbr the '90s. manyppkdidn't%c this film, is Exactly what kind ofadapta- the modemidon. For me, it tion this is, is an inarrstog W O r l c d T h t ~ w a s ~ question. Is this a E a W i vaslon all prrsawd, with no wo or a needless moderization? added. Some of the minor scam Neithcr. 'IhisversionofRomcoand JJict is, at its heart, a covet. Like theLano~90supdvtof theSim0nand~rlzPoic "Mrs.-n,"RacodJJict has its tem tweaked, the iIlmummls pi & d i n a n d t b e MhuntcrvlLed Jumping bttwacnthe finnetic intensity of a Beastic.Boys video and the warm scndacnts of a

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L d o t s m h a s d Shalaspcarr's Julia must bc th perfect woman-verbose

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LIST?

If you are, you will be an owner of the official UW Final Exam Sun/ival Kit, sponsored by Student Alumni Association (SAA) and Zehrs Markets. Final Exam Survival Kits can be picked up at the Student Life Centre, room 2122 in the Student Alumni Association (SAA) Office, just right above the Imprint Office. Ask the Turnkey Desk for directions, if unsure.

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Pickup times: Monday, Nov. 25 from 11 a.m. to 2 p.m., Tuesday, Nov. 26 from 11 a.m. to 2 p.m. Late pickups are on Friday, Nov. 30 from 10 a.m. to 3 p.m. Are the hours inconvenient for you? Visit the SAA Office, check out our office hours or leave a message under the door with your name, ID number, phone number and what time you prefer to pick up your very own kit. Ahmed,Adam Akhtar, Jack Albreish, Claudine Alderson, K&en Alexander, Donna Alexander, Stefan Alfarano, Ctis Ali, Anwer Ali, Rena Allen, Mark Alton, Sabrina Amarelo, Sandy Amo, Mona E Andre, Rene Ang, Michael Anthony, Doug Arrell, Russell Atkinson, Michael T. Atlee, Chris Badour, Anais BaileyJennifer Baker, Susan Ballweg, Kate Banks, Ryan Barber, Lynn Barclay, Danielle Barkiey, Erika Barrette-Thibodeau, Annik Barsalou, Amy Bartholomew, Steve Barton, Mike Bassett, Andrea Baumgartner, Barbara Beaulieu, Denis Beavis, Emily Beckett, Todd Beecroft, Doug Beemer, Scott Beese, Christine Beeston, Michael Belfry, Paul Bell, Sarah Bell, Timothy Benson, Bryan Berube, Andrew B handarkar, Sheila B hatia, Sandy Blackmore, Elizabeth Blue, Shannon Boere, David Bogart,Matt Borg, Brian Bos, Adrian Bourdeau, Rachel Brandl, Erica Breitman. Pearl Brigneti, Piero Brillinger, Paul Broel&of, Kathleen Brown, Jeff Brown, Jordan Brown, Lindsay Brown, Michael William Brown,Elizabeth Bruner, Emily Brydon,fames Buchanan, L. Blythe Bums, Adam Bums, Andrew Burrows, Richard Burrows, Teresa Burtch, Mike Calcaterra, Niki Cameron, Gregory Campagnoni, David Cappello, ALicia Cardoso, Diana Caniere, Jordin Catli, Starly Cayer, Suzanne

Chambers, Mamie Chan, Justin Ghan, Vienne Chapman, Felicia Charles, Cameron Chau, Sinclair Chaudhary, Sunita Cheung, Simon Chow, Florence Chow, Tony Christie, Stacey Chu, Aaron L Chupik, Tahlia Cieplinski, Avi Cipriani, Anna Marie Clancy, Joseph Clark, Colleen Clark, Katherine Clark, Stephen Clarke, Carolyn Cochrane, Shawna Collins, Chris Cooper, Kim Corbett, Ruthanne Corr, John Cote. Mark Cole, Meka Cova, Steph Croll, Andrew Cunie, Simon Cymbalisty, Lindsey Dâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;Amelio, Brett Daley, Mat Daley, Philip Davies, Neil J Davis, Sarah Dawson, Amy De Guzman, Jaime De Haan, Matt De Zotti, Diane Delooze, Kim Deneau, Jeff Denneny, Scott Dennis, Jason Derkatz, Robb Deschamp, Leslie Detweiler, Holly-Ann Devaul, Kristine Dhirani,Rehana Diamond, Jason Dimuantes, Simon Doris, Mathew Downie,Gillian Dubois, Jay Duff, Leame Duke, Anthony Dulat, Margaret Dumas, Austin Duncan, Jennifer E. Dunford, Drena Dunn, Jennifer L, Duval, Dan

Dyck, Ian Eastman, Tricia A Edwards, Kris Edwards, Laura Elvikis,David Epp, Jacqueline Emewein, Melissa Evers, Michael Farquharson, Mari Farrell, Glenda Feldman, Matthew Feng, Benjamin Ferguson, Grant Femandez, Sheldon Ferrel.Sandra Fiorente, Anna Fisher, Craig Flanagan, Thomas

Fletcher, Chet Flint, Vanessa Flor, Leonna Flores, Carlos Font,Fernando Jr Forsythe, Troy Fourine, Kyle Fournier, Carrie Foumier, Julie Fox, Allyson Fuchs, Mike Fueten, Louise Gadsby, Am

Garner, Brenda Gary, Cara Gatien, Ghyslaine George, Cot-y Guy Gervais, Micheal Gibson, Blair Giffen, Lori Giles, Paula Ginn, Carrie Glauser,Julie Goddard, Shannon Gaff, Namgyal Goller, Darren D Gomes, Michelle Goodchild, Kevin Grabb, Jonathan Graham, Christine Graham, Nathalie Grai nger, Heather Grant, David Green, Chris Groves, Jennifer Guitard, Michelle Hagens, Shanna Halayko, Jason Hall, Belinda Hamer, Emily Hamilton, Craig Hammell, Brad Hanam, Jason Handsor, Stephanie Harmer, Brian Harris, Laura Harris, Lisa Hartman, David Hartwick, Andy Hartwick, John Harvey, Christopher Hawkins, Shauna Hay, Carolyn Haynes. Alison Head, Roby n Helmerichs, Ren6 Higgins, Bryn Hillier, Angela Hobbs, Lisa Hockley, Derek Hodd,Richard Hodgins, Darryl Hogle, Jamie Hong, Kevin Hood, Heather Hope, Andrew Hurd,Adam Huskins, Brad Hwang, Christine Ieraci, Sophia Ireland, Chris Jackscha, Lisa Jaggassar, Lora Janecek, Mia Jewlal, Vince Johnson, Jeremy E Johnson, Tyler Johnston, Ryan Jube, David

Juhn, Matthew Kaida, Angela Kane, Michael Karachiwala, Zak Kann. James Keast, ColIeen Keating, Chris Keddy, Sandy L. Keeping, Jody Keith, Julia Keller, Kent Kennedy,Joanna Kettlewell, Brian Kim, Brian Kim, Francis Kit, Karen Kitay, Tami Knowles, Jeff Koeslag, Rebecca Kowlessar, Indrani Kwant, Brenda Kwong, Hui Haniet La Croix, Michael hccetti , Jessica Lake, Dave Lalonde, Stephanie Lam, Carman N.M Lamb, Neil Lampi, Dana Lane, Darlene Eanglois, Dan G Lansing, Peter Latulippe, Tracy Laurie, Lisa Law, Vincent Lee, Catherine Lee, Siu Lan Lefaive, Nancy Lessard, Angela Levitz, Aron Lewis, Ian A. Loach, Scot Lo Franco,John Loney, Scott Long, Rachel L.ong, Stephanie Iq=, Joey Low, Daryl Lowe, Allison Lute, David Luhur, Ralph Lumb, Kevin Luy&Andrew Lyle, Ryan Lyn, Laurie Mac Donald, Jeffrey Mac Kinnon, Shaun Mace, K.&a AM Madden, Jennifer Magum, Ken Magwood, Simone Mahaffy, Leah Maharaj, Ranjeev Mailloux, Dianne MaillouxJerry Majaury, Colleen Mandel, Gregory Mann, Thomas Mannarelli, Marina Marano, Steve A Marhand, Melanie Ma&t, Craig Marriner, Ray Martin, Nathan Massoud, Jennifer Mattausch, Christy Mawson, Christie McCauley, Marsha McCready, Chris (X2) McDougall, Heather McFadden,Tina

McKenzie, Gillian McKnight, Margaret McLean, Patti McManus, Ryan McMillan Brent McNeil, Maureen Meilleur, Desiree Meskis, Tammy Mewes, Jennifer Miles, Danny Milner, Catherine Moffatt, James Moffin, Craig Moore, Jennifer L Moore, Kelly Morris, Jenny Morrison, Charlotte Motison,Eva Morse, Sara Morton, Alex Muir, Tara Munteanu, Michael Murdoch, Greg Mmy,Amy Mychajluk, Angie Nagy, Chris Naidu, Suresh Nauta, Teresa Nelson, Leigh Neumann, Kirsten Neveu, Staci Ngan. Janice Nidd, Jim Noble, Michael Nolting, Allison Normani, Franc0 Northan, Brian Northan, Jenny Nystedt, Janet Owen, Meredith Oxley, Pat Painter, Greer Pangan, Oliver Park, Eunah Parkin, Jennifer Parks, Kellie Parks, Michael Parsons, Lisa Pascoe, Erika Paterson, John Patterson, Jeremy Pausner,Jay Pearce, Michelle Penner, Karah Per&a, Chantelle Peterson, Mark Peterson, Wendy Petr, Jan Petr, Pomas Phillips, Simon Pickles, Jason Wm. Piva, R. Edward Platt, Craig Podolyak, Les Pollitt, Tara Poor& Lisa Postma, Shawn Potvin, Geoff Poulton, Mark Prat, Nicole L Price, Adrienne Price, Diana Louise Proulx, Eric Quesnel, Joseph Race, Pat Raittenen, Lisa Ramchandar, Kevin Rameshwar, Anya Ramji, Aly Rashid, Amal

Rayes, Margie M Redly, Galan Reiner, Eric T. Richardson, Chris Roberts, Jody Robinson, Lori Rodrigues, Jude11Ann Ronchka, Carolyn Rose, Jackie Russill, Kathryn Saab, Mark Sabatini, Andrea Sabourin, Laura Sadler, Kirk Sag!osk.i,Tiffany Salomone, Paul SaltJessica Sam, Graham Sanders, She@ Sanderson, Valerie Sandiford, Graham Sarkar, Niladri Schipper, Dan Schuster, Lise Sciarra,Lorissa Scott, Karyn Scott, Phillip SeatonJennie Semedo, Fernando Shanbhag, Maneesh Shanmugarajah, Anusha Shantz, Andrea Sharma, Neepun Shaughnessy, Tony Shearer, Mary Jo Simons, Jacqueline Simpson, Shannon Sinclair, Allison Sinton, James Slager, Matthew Smith, Jon Smith, Melanie Smith, Suzanne

So, Jennifer So,Carmen Sorgi, Jessica Spadafora, Lisa Spafford, Terry Spanner, Michael Spencer, Dena Speziale, Paul St Pierre, Matthieu Steele, Bill Steinbach, Rebecca Stilmk, Kyle Stimson, Hugh Stoness, April Strong, Emily Sunnucks, Karen Surprenant, Brian Swerdfeger,Howard szpilewski, Sarah Szwec, Jennifer Talamwski, Michael Tambunini, Arne-Lia Tang, William Taylor, Amy Taylor, Ginette Tereszchuk, Keith The, Dennis Thomas, Kesheyl Thompson, Jason Thompson, Lisa A, Thorleifson, Mullein Theme, Matthew Thome, Stephen Titus, Julie Tobman, Erin Tong, Anita Trinidad, Cathy

Trussell, Jason Tully, Brock Turcotte, Shannon Twine, Jamie Tynkkynen, Kelly Ulmer, Rebecca Van Blyderveen, Sheny Van DeValk, Ken-i Van Dyken, Jonathan S Van, Groningen, Jason Vandenbrink, Jeff VanderWeg, Liesje Veci, Eva Venel, Otti Keira: Annette Vincent, Andrew Wace, Keith Waddell, Ryan Wagar, Brandon Warren, Trisha Weber, Jaime Lynn Wenk, Brian Wentzel, Kris Whaling, Krista L Wheeler, James Whitby, Eric Whitcher, Heather White, Mike Whittington, Beth Whitty, Jamie Wiggin, Martha Wight, Derek Williams, Jennifer C. Wilson, Christopher. S.A. Wilson, Dana Helene Wilson, Marc Wilson, Michael Wilson, Troy

Wink, Andrea Wise, Kathryn Witherow, Dave Wong, Hi Yiu Angelo Wang, Russell Wong,Angela Kar Yee Wood, Michelle Wright, Doug Wright, Krista K Yeomans, Claire York, Mandy Zablocki, Victoria Zelazny, Michelle Zimmer, Janis Zinszer, Cheryl

Axnong thebest . University of Waterloo receiveshigh ranking in. Macleans poll This was the first year since 1992 that all the universities in English-speaking Canada have responded and entered the rankings, making this one of the most inclusive rankings in recent years. he results of the latest M&w.z’~ magazine university rankings are in and Waterloo placed The rankings are based on six major categories, second overall in the comprehensive category. weighted as follows: student body (210/o), classes UW has moved up in the survey from its third place (17%),faculty(17%),fmances(l2%),library(12%) standing last year, and was surpassed only by Simon and reputation (20%). Waterloo’s large class sizes Fraser University in BC. and small budgets tended to hurt our standings again This year, as in previous years, UW ha been this year. recognized as the premiere institution in Canada This year’s annualMiz&~~ survey has noted that when it comes to reputation. This is no consolation higher tuition costs and cuts in government spendprize either. Those who were surveyed this year ing are having their effect on post-secon’dary educaregarding the reputation rankings were over 3,400 tion in Canada. Ln more than half of the universities high school guidance counsellors, academic adminissurveyed, fewer classes are being taught by tenured trators and CEOS ofmajor corporations across Canada. faculty and fewer students are graduating on time. Commehtin~ on this year’s performance, UW Matthew Hough, National Director of the Canapresident Dr. James Downey stated that we “fared Employers still like you best if you have been through this dian Alliance of Student Associations, noted that well both statistically and even better in reputation.” entrance. “these results were predicted years ago. Severe, rapid, photo by Rob Van Kruistum He indicated that this was very important since mismanaged changes have taken their toll.” Midem’s increased the number of people consulted with have a high standard of faculty awards and the highest With all the contr&ersy and speculation now surrespect to the reputation survey and the results indicate c@ity graduates.. .is it [class size] a true indicator - no.” rounding university and its costs and accessibility, it is still that UW is wel.I known and highly respected. Comprehensive universities, according to M&Lean-‘s reassuring to see that UW has been able to maintain He has less confidence in what the indicators for the magazine, are ‘Cuniversities with a sign&ant amount of reputational and statistical stantig in the survey. actual rankings measure since many of the facts and figures research activity and a wide range of programs at the For those disheartened by UW’s inability to capture seem to be unimportant with regard to the quality of the graduate and undergraduate levels.” The rankings do not first place, Downey is confident that “the academic~uah~ education that UVV can provide. “If with increased class consider the opinions of the students or graduates of e&h of the students is the true measure of the academic c.luali& size we can achieve the greatest number of student awards, institution, or the programs offered. of the institution.” by Rob Van Imprint

Kruistum staff

Report details “utterly necessary” Feds question process‘in sexual harassment case keep the individuals names confidential, but they also say that it is “utterly necessary” to release a sanitized report, that would describe the circumstances of rhe incident oflowing the reinstatement of a UW Professor without revealing any names. Without this, claims the Federation, ‘<students may decline to report the incident if accused of sexual harassment, the Federation of Students has issued a statement expressing its dissat- they believe that the case will take a signifigant period of isfaction with the process. The statement was supported by time to resolve, or if they are not aware of cases that have Student Council in an unanimous vote. resulted in sanctions for offenders.” The Feds were reacting to an outside adjudicator’s Overall, the Federation of Students feel that revision decision to reinstate a professor previously dismissed by of Policy 53 (Faculty Appointments - Tenure) and Policy UVV. Three women, consisting of students and staff, 33 (Ethical Behaviour) is long overdue. “It would be accussed the professor of sexual harassment, The adjudicaunfortunate)) the statement says, ‘&to think that stuhents tor found that the professor’s conduct “‘was not of suchma need to turn to the Ontario Human Rights Commission serious nature as to render the faculty member clearly unfit for justice.” for employment,” and instead ordered that he attend ‘W.e can’t say whether the adjudicator was right or counselling for a year. Both the names md the details ofthe wrong in making the decision she did, because we don’t incident have been withheld by UW administration. know the facts,” Heather Calder, Coordinator of the In the statement, the Feds say that the decision has left Student Issues Resource centre said “But we can’t say that students ccdiscouragedy’ about the process of dealing with we are surprised at this case.” sexual harassment on campus. Moreover, in theif: words Calder’s lack of surprise comes from past experience with the Professor Kumar incident. Kumar was found “the publication of such findings without context render students confked and unsure about how to proceed with guilty of sexual harassment on a field trip to India, and last complaints.” ’ year was fined six months salary over two years, a decision The Feds respect the decision ofthe parties involved to that a lot of students found to be unsatisfactory. by Greg K&chick Imprint staff-

“Everything we’ve seen at IJW that has to do with sexual harassment and termination of tenure has been unsatisfactory.” Calder said, In addition to calling for a sanitized report, Calder said that the Feds want some movement on the report drafted by the Provost’s Ad Hoc Committee on Harassment and Discrimination, or PACOHAD. That report was drafted ’ two years ago, and according to Calder “they came up with some very good ideas” on how to deal with harassment. Since then very little has been done to implement the committee’s ideas.

NEWS

by Karsten W. G&r Imprint staff

arlicr this week, Quebec’s Education Minister, Pauline Marois delivered a severe low-blow to Canadian unity when she a&ounced that Canadian students from other provinces will be charged higher tuitions than their Quibecois peers. Premier Lucien Bouchard’s drastic deficit cutting proposals have sparked massive student protests which have gained considerable momentum during the past week and have threatened peaceful unity at this weekend’s PQ convention. In response to these protests, the PQ decided to uphold their promise to freeze tuition until the next election. As a result, Qu&&ois students will continue to pay significantly less than the rest of the country, an average of $ 1 682 per year. Out-of-province students, however, will now have to pay the average tuition charged in the rest of Canada, a

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hefty $2 913 per year: Naturaliy, Quebec’s three English-language universities are in an uproar about the decision, considering the substantial number of out-of-province students attending those institutions: Twenty per cent of McGill’s, fifteen uer cent of Concordia’s and ahnoit fifty per cent of Bishop’s total student body are nonQu&ecois. The creation of a two-tiered system sends a disturbing message to the rest of the country, and in particular to Anglophone students, many of them now feeling unwelcome in Quebec universities. The fact that Quebec is the only province to chqe more to Canadian out-of-province students raises the somewhat rhetorical question if Canadians are wanted in Quebec. PQ officials, however, do not expect enrolment by Anglophone students to decrease, as the new tuition &ill does not exceed the national average. When Imprint contacted Chris Carter, president ofMcGill’s

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e27thHageylRcturewas delivered by John Ralston Saul on Wednesday night to a near capacity crowd in the Humanities Theatre at Hagey Hall. Saul was also present Thursday morning in the Student Life centre for an “interactive” question and answer session. His topic was “Power Versus the Public Good: The Conundrum of Individualism and the Citizen,” which follows directly. from his latest non-fiction works, Bas-

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student federation, he described the tuition hikes to out-of-province students as “a major disappointment, surprise and an act of discrimination.” At no time during the debate surrounding education &ts was the hike ever mentioned, and therefore no alternatives were presented or discussed. In a raspy voice following day-long heated protests, Chris Carter de&redMarois’ announcement ccapolitical move and a backhanded attempt to divide and weaken the very strong student movement in Quebec.” According to Carter, this move backfired, as students have remained unified, If anything, the tuition hikes have strengthened the student movement, as it now not only addresses education cuts in general, but also the discriminatory hikes. Marois’ move might even backfire on a political level, as students, who traditionally constitute the main support of the PQ party, feel betrayed by the P-9

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Increase to affect outafbrovince students

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Friday, November

Quebec to -raise tuition

Imprint News .-

IMPRINT,

Saul shows the corporatists the door. photo

by Gillian

Dowries

and l%e Unc~scosW C~~&&WZ. Saul once- again decried the domination of public debate by experts using exclusionary lanmaze and doematic truths. the &a&ring of s&iety into in&rest goup units and the destruction of the notion of the public good..

IMPRINT,

Friday, November

NEWS

22, 1996

Fight fire with fire Student leaders in Alberta form a political party by Jason Kirby special to Imprint f three student leaders in Alberta are successful, Klein and company may have to go from dodging rotten eggs to answering to students in the provincial legislature. The student union presidents ofAlberta’s three largest universities, the University of Alberta, the University of Calgary and the University of Lethbridge, ate seriously toying with the idea of forming a party to run in the next provincial election, expected to be called in March or April of 1997. Garett Poston, president of the University of Alberta Students’ Association, says the political route is being looked at because of the failure of more orthodox forms of student activism in the past. Q’s one of the ideas we’ve had to try and aggressively put education back somewhere near the top of the public agenda in this province,” he says. Since being elected in 1992, Ralph Klein’s provincial government has cut more than 2 1 per cent from its education budget. This amdunts to $179 million, and Poston Sayspost-secondary education has assumed the brunt of the cuts. He says the idea for running in the election evolved last May when it became clear that an election would be called in the

Alberta, the students must present a petition with 5,000 signatures and a name for the party to the chief electoral officer. Although no one has come up with a name yet, Shriner, the president of the U of Lethbridge Students’ Union, says running is something he’s prepared to do. He says there will be a plebiscite held before the end of this semester before he joins with the other two student leaders. While he admits that the only official political club on campus is the Reform party he says Lethbridge still has political diversity. ‘We see a good mix,” he says. ‘You can definitely tell that there are conservative persuasions (but it goes) all the way to Marxist persuasions.” He says a great deal depends on how students view the three political hopefuls. If they are viewed as a left-wing or centrist party, then it is possible that the nonconservative vote may be split, and he says he doesn’t want that. Rob V~JJ Walleghem, executive director of the provincial Liberal Party says he doesn’t want that either. “I appreciate and respect their choice to run a candidate,” he says. “I think it’s a noble intention, but it’s politically naive.” He says he’s concerned that ifthe SNdent leaders decide to run, and they attract a large number of student votes, more centrist parties such as the Liberals will be hurt.

ents. He says plebiscites held at the U of A and U of C have given himself and Samarasekera the support of the students in those universities to go ahead with the election. However, Poston saysthat no one will declare their candid&y until January or February and the foal decision depends on three things. “A lot of it has to do with the political climate,” he says. Vlso the amount of money that’s gone back into education and the issues that the media and the public are focusing on.” In order to form a political party in

90 votes. He says in the next election the riding could become Liberal - unless the student leaders split the vote. Poston says while they will run to win, the three don’t have any delusions/Let’s face it. The chances of us winning aren’t great,” he says “So there have to be other objectives by which we can measure the success of this initiative.” He says it is the amount of media coverage and the level of public knowledge of the education issue which will finally determine the successof the election plan. Christian Dallaire, president of the Carleton University Students’ Association,

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says he couldn’t see himself running in an Ontario election if it were called today. He says that it would be more effective if the students belonged to a national student lobby group. “It’s a really damn good idea,” says Dallaire, ‘“But I’m to busy dealing with fixing CUSA. Taking on the provincial government isn’t something I have time for.” This arti& mii~ally speared in the Charlatan, the Carletun Unhm@y stwhat newspaper.

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Erratum: In lastweek’s ImprinGwe erroneously reported the name of tie CampusShopmanagertobeRosemary Hawthorne. Her name is in fact Rose Vogt. We apologize for the emr.

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Feds Annual General Meeting makes quorum by Karsta W. Gitter Imprint staff

November ast Tuesday 12, the Federation of Students held its Annual GeneralMeeting in the Multi-Purpose Room of the SLC. mer failing to reach the necessary quorum of 15 people last October, the attendance this time around was a pleasant surprise. The continuous flow of the arriving masses not only resulted in most seats being occupied, but also in a 20 minute

Boosting interest in student affairs. delay of the meeting. Those masseswere then treated to the Annual Auditor’s Report on the Feds’ financial position as of April 30,1996. Several factors generated an increase in revenue, such as the new location of the Used Bookstore and Copy Plus, combined with the amalgamation of the Variety Store and the Post OffIce. This increase, however, was balanced by an increase in wages and back-UP interest charges. Overall, the fma,&al position of the

Feds remains fairly stable. Copies of the Auditor’s Report are available from the Feds’ General Manager, Bob Sproule, at the Feds’ ofice in the SLC. Amendments to several by-laws, as outlined in the Feds notice given on page 10 of the November 1 issue of Imprint, were next on the agenda. mer presenting their I.D. cards, each student was invited to vote on the proposed changes. Although the amendment dew with the Students’ Council’s duties had to get altered slightly, the majority of them were passed with little or no contest. At the conclusion of the meeting, the Feds leaders had prepared an overwhelming number of overhead slides to outline various projects planned and already in progress. The large variety of these projects constitutes the main elements of an “in your face campaign” aimed at increasing students’ awareness of the Feds and their goals. Publication ofthe Feds values, vision and mission through campus-wide activities, including a series of debates aimed at educating and updating students about the pressing+sues on campus are only a few means by which the Feds hope to boost students’ interest in Feds af%rs. If you would like to find out more about these upcoming projects or would like to volunteer your assistance,feel free to contact your Feds President Mario Bcllabarba (x2478) or any other Feds executive.

IMPRiNT, Friday, November 22, 1996

special to Imprint

n the November 12 edition of the Financial Post, Peter Fitzpatrick comments that the aerospace industry in Canada is greatly in need of highly skilled labourers. A company like Bombardier Inc., which is based in Montreal, is frantically searching for “200 engineers and technologists, in part because of its planned new regional jet.” Even a company like Boeing Co. cannot keep up with its orders and has had to advertise to fLlfill its need of 13,000 employees. University students, particularly those in engineering and computer science, should be made aware of this concern and it is this “shortage” of labour that should give them an indication as to where they should be concentrating on their potential employment prospects. But Peter Broadhurst, vice-president of human resources at Litton Systems Canada Ltd., says that if you look at each company, ‘?hey+e all wrestling with some shortage in some area, and again they have surpluses in other areas.” The goal for university students is therefore to try to pinpoint the regions of Canada that may be in need of their particular area of expertise. Clearly illustrated is the point that Broadhurst makes about Metro Toronto where there is a lot of skilled labour yet

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They 5-eall wrestling with some shortage. little research now and find out where their skills can be matched within a particular region to a company that is desperately in need of their particular discipline. By making contact with companies immediately, students stand a greater chance of placement instead of just waiting until they graduate. This is a necessary practise that should be exercised not only by engineering and computer science students but students from all different faculties as well. For sourcing information please visit the Career Resource Centre located in Needles Hall.

Play deals with harassment by Heather Calder special to Imprint

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there is a lack of program managers %vho can co-ordinate the building of large components and communicate with customers .” In the spring of 1997, new graduates will be hoping to find employment and basically to get on with their lives asker the long haul of studying at university. One way to alleviate this firture stress is to do a

exual harassment. We’ve heard about it in the news ,and read about it in this very paper, but sometimes it’s not clear what it is and what you can do ifit happens to you. The Drama 390 ensemble, along with Denise Angove (producer, of ‘S@$4 and Say), is coming to venues near you for the week ofNovember 25-28, to help you sort out some of these issues. Their newest collaboration is a play calledPass the Sugar, HT. The one-act play deals specifically with the sexual harassment of a UW stu-

Does sexual harassment always rneauz a lawsuit? dent on co-op placement. One of the characters, Janine, goes to Toronto on a business trip with two of her managers. While on the trip, her manager Michael kissesher. Janine is co&sed by his actions and tries to tell her supervisor, who doesn’t seem to want to deal with it. Phil, Michael’s

colleague,

accmes

Michael

sexual harassment. Janine begins to avoid the office, and her fellow co-op student, Karen, is concerned that Janine has been “sick” for so long. Karen notices that people around the office have begun to act strangely around each other as many people do in real

workplace situations and the play illustrates that sexual harassment afZectseveryone, not just those who experience it directly. Does sexual harassment always mean a lawsuit? Are people just being to0 sensitive when they say they have been sexually harassed? What should you do if you think you have been sexually harassed? What if your supervisor doesn’t listen to you? These kinds of questions and more are dealt with as Janin; and Michael reveal their own perspectives and take steps towards positive resolution. Everyone is welcome to attend performances, and discussion will take place tier the play. For more information, please call Denise Angove, Health Services, at x2981. Perfbmances Monday November25 5:30pm - Renison College Ctieteria Tuesday November 26 12: 15pm - Math Comfy Lounge 530pm - Village 1 cafeteria Wednesday November 27 53Opm - Ron Eydt Village (VII) Thursday November 28 12pm - Conrad Grebel College cafeteria 5:3Qpm - St. Jerome’s College cafeteria. Friday November 29 11:30 - Philosophy 100, EL 105 Tuesday December 3 12:15 - Theatre of the Arts 1: 30 - Theatre of the Arts

Friday, November

IMPRINT,

22, 1996

NEWS

7;?

A Charest morning

Macarenamania!

-Can YOU dance the Macarena? Do you want to learn? And give to the United Way at the same time? UW has been challenged by Laurier to beat their record of 300 people dancing the Macarena for charity. ALL students, staff, and faculty are invited to show up in the SLC at noon on Wednesday, contribute a Loonie for the United Way, and get down to it. You can get your daily exercise,give to the United Way, preserve UW’s honour and most of all look just a bit goofy! Remember: you have to pay a Lootie to be counted against WLU’s total. Have h!

Charest demostrates

the proper

way to extend the gladhand. photo

Imprint

News

espite their humiliating defeat during the last election, the Progressive Conservative Party is optimistic about their chances at forming the next Federal government. That was the message delivered by Jean Charest to over 200 PC supporters at Federation Hall last Tuesday. Riding high on the Conservative victory in PET., Charest spoke enthusiastically to the pro-Conservative crowd, criticizing the Liberals for everything that’s gone wrong in the last few years while crediting the policies of the last Conservative government for all the achievements Canada has made since the Liber-

by Daniel

German

als took power. Charest briefly touched on several Federal issues, including the volatile Situation in Quebec. Charest responded to questions regarding Quebec’s new antianglophone policies by stating “I’m trying to separate the politics from the rhetoric in Quebec. It’s beendificultinthelastfewweeks. What I have always said is that the Quebec government should allow a lot more flexibility in its language laws. Let a little oxygen in, and send a signal to the people of Quebec and Canada that we are in a point in the evoIution of the French Language that we can do that. But for some odd reason, they don’t seem to be able to grasp that.”

SAC o’ goodies by Andrew Kennedy special to Imprint his weeks SAC article has several short items and an nouncements to make. First off, a progress check on the co-op process. Earlier in the term, we published some statistics regarding the placement rates. Now that first rounds are done, its time to look at the results from the placement process. In 1995, the percentage of people with placements for the winter t&m tier first round was 53.94 percent, and 96.6 percent at the end of the term. This year the first round placement percentage is 54.46 percent. As you can recall, we indicated earlier in the term that some 22.6 percent of students were al-

students are still seeking employment. However, the projections are good for these students to find work during the second rounds and the overall placement rates should be good. The placement rates ranged from 100 percent for those in the Teaching Option to 41.38 percent for those in AI-IS.’ There are hvo events coming up which may lx of interest to coop students. The first is a seminar about sexual harassment in the workplace. It will be held in the Multi Purpose Room in the Student Life Center (the big roomin the middle) on Thursday, November 28 at 4pm. The seminar is entitled ‘Xm I just being too sensitive?” and will be an interactive seminar about the topic. For more details contact Heather

ready

Calder

placed.

through

jobs

they

had found on their own or jobs they were returning to. The placement rate given above refers to the rate for aH those students who did not have a job prior to the beginning of first rounds. This means that some 32 percent of

CHEVY SlO

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At the same time, there will be a Watpub in the Bomber. This is intended to be a means for any co-ops who are working in Toronto to get together, meet other l

continued

page 8

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IMPRINT,

Friday, November

22, 1996

The Feds get interactive! .

by Julie Primmu VP Intemd Fedemtion of Students Leading up to and following the Annual General Meeting, the Fed Executive has been discussing their progress over the months in office. I have decided that in light of this theme it would be appropriate to have the students evaluate how we are doing. A box will be available at the Turnkey desk for you to drop off this evaluation form. Please take this time to evaluate your Federaltion of Students. If I have said it once, I’ve said it a milliion times, the Feds exist for you the student, so let us know what you think.

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I know

2)Y Noccasion.

I have ken

3)Y

I know

4) Y

NN -

5)Y Nresponsible 6)Y

Meet someone special or just have fun an the phone!

l-on-l LIVE Connections

the Federation

of Students

N-

to the Fed offke

on at least one .

who the Fed executive

I have been to a Feds awareness I know for.

are.

9)Y NI think that the Feds provide services, businesses, and events which enhance my experience at UW

. day.

what each of the Fed Executives

use one (or many)

10) Y N -

I follow

the Feds election

coverage.

1l)Y

I have voted in a Fed election.

of the Fed -

Please list them below

N-

12) Y N-

I have been or am a Feds volunteer.

7)Y N L I frequently businesses

I think that the Feds could do more for me.

13) Y N - I am pleased with how the Feds represent pertaining to academic issues. 14) Y N - I am f;uniliar source Centre

with

the Student

Issues Re-

-1 some&a

find out about Fed related eventS

15) Y N too late

16) I learn about Fed related events by (circle all that apply)

a) reading the Imprint b)word of mouth c) through posters/banners

for Menor Women!

whcrc

/ r&d 7 I. E

S)Y Noffice is.

8) Y N - I can name at least five of the Feds provide. .

servicesthat the

17)Y

N-

I know

18) Y N -

I know

what a Watpub

that my Fed fee is spent only

Pleaselist them below

servicesand not on Fed businesses.

19) ir N - If f have a question, approaching the Feds for answers.

I feel comfortable

2. 20) Y N Fed office

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continued from

page 7

students and generally socialize. This event wiU start at about the same time, so plan to attend the seminar first and drop by the Bomber after it’s done. The Watpub will run until about 7pm so drop by and see who else you might -know who’s working in Toronto. Fin&y, you have been reading these articles all or most &he term andhave been learning more about the co-op process here at Waterloo and aboutSAC. We are looking for a chair for both the Winter and Summer terms in ~ 1997. What follows is a brief job description and mission statement for SAC. Students Advising Chop is a

student organization whose purpose is to help promote the student viewpoint and to be an agent of change within the co-op department. Its goal is to ensure that student views arerepresented and to propose changes for the system that will benefit students. As the chair, you will set the direction for SAC. You are also responsible for making sure that &dent views are represented in the department. You will work with other students and the aciministration to help the department make decisions and to propose changes that help students,

SAC has many projects on the go. Various subcommittees or groups exist to look at particular problems (like the mop fee or work term evaluations) depend-

ing on the interest of the students involved. The chair helps to coordinate their activities and ensure that any problems they may run into are resolved. We all know that the system isn’t perfect. Here’s your chance to help fix it. If you’re interested, please send an e-mail summarizing your interest to work with SAC and qualifications to claw@novice .uwaterloo.ca bef& December 1. We will be contacting you after the applications

have

been reviewed.

Ccxnments and feedback can be sent to sac@undergrad .math.uwaterloo.ca or posted to uw.coop.sac. Students

Advising

Co-op

meets every Tuesday at 5: 30pm in Needles Hall 1030.

IMPRINT,

NEWS

22, 1996

Friday, November

CampusQuestion:,

Do you think the details involving the recent harassment case at UWshould be made *fmblic?

by Kelly McMaster and Tara Schagena (photos)

Wit was me, then I wouldn’t want the Wormation released because it’s my private business.W Rachel Mlock IM3bChemi~try

“It depends on the truth behind the allegations.”

“1 think that we should have a right to know what he’s done.”

‘Where are still issues outstanding then he shouldn’t be reinstated.”

7es - to remove doubt in people’s minds as to what realty happened?

soap opera story?

JcmnifkrLasky ZAchemistry

“1 don’t thhk the details are of any use to anybody.n

Michael Downing 1N Honours Arts

JdieMacArthur

1NArts

Trevor Fentoll 4AChemicalEn~~g

MidNguyen

2AKinesiology

trials are open to the public a&way.”

uMost

EdSaikal.i 2A Computer Science

J.P. wallach 1A Biology

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Manufacturing D issent ’ by Sandy Atwal Imprint, EIC

Buy Something

Every Day

The forum pages allow members of the University of Waterloo community to present their views on various issues through letters to the editor and longer comment pieces. The opinions expressedin columns, comment pieces, letters and other articles are strictly those of the authors, not of Imprint. Imprint is an editorially independent newspaper published by Imprint Publications, Waterloo, a corporation without share capital. Imprint, Student Life Centre, Room 1116, University of Waterloo, Waterloo, Ontario, NZL 3G 1.

f all the senseless, fktile, pointless and downright flaky ideas that Ad&tm and their conxnunist cohorts have come up with, Buy Nothing Day is probably the most inane. In a meaningless show of self-important hype, A&sters and The Media Foundation (the otiganization that produces the magaz&) are advocating a “Buy Nothing Day.” (For more information on it, check out this week’s Feature.) Buy Nothing Day is apparently the “brainchild’ of Vancouver, BC artist/activist Ted Dave. He started it as a “gesture of protest for those of us who feel as if our lives and dreams have been marketed back to us.” According toAdbatsters, “Buy Nothing Day is an attempt to draw attention to what many groups and individuals believe is the primary environmental problem in the world: overconsumption by people in the affluent, industrial&d west .” That statement was taken directly fi-om their web page. Now let’s just take a look at what thefre saying. First of all, the organizers of this Buy Nothing Day are themselves admitting that this event is designed not to change anything, it% not! meant to redress some wrong, it’s not meant to effect any kind of change, it’s meant to CCdrawattention” to an event. Draw attention? That sounds suspiciously like advertising. But anyway, look at the typical nonsense in the rest of the statement: cc. . .many groups (What groups? The Insane Philologists of Brazil? How m&y?) and individuals (well that sort of goes without saying, right, since groups are usually-made up of individuals) bebeve (a ha! Believe. Not %now” not “have documented evidence to shou;” not %n prove”) is the primary environmental problem in the world: overconsumption by people in the af&ent, industrialized west.” The ambiguity of that statement is just one example of how &&vG-~ is (and always been) long on ideology and short on practicality. To illustrate what I mean, let’s look at what ‘cguy Nothing Day” really means in my neig’hbourhood. The principle%en&actors of my spending power are, unsurprisingly, very small businesses.The comer store nearest my house is run by a very pleasant, friendly, Oriental fdy. I’ve been going to this store for nearly four years now and have even, on rare occasion, gone out of my way to patronize the store, Were people to truly take Ad&G& proposal seriously, this family would sell absolutely nothing on November 29. Of course this would hardly cripple the store, but to be sure, this is an extremely bad day-for the store. Am I supposed to explain to the owners of the store that they are being sacrificed for some pathetic publicity stunt? Any day that a retail business sells absolutely nothing is a bad day. Is it rational to ask this family-owned business to s&ifice a M day’s worth of sales for some vaguely defined Ggre&er good?” This is left-wing posturing at its worst. Rather than suggest the boycott of a specific business (a technique known to work) the %ulture jammerSn at Adhat& lazily suggest a Buy Nothi.@ Day. I say lazily because it takes work to come up with a specific plan to stop a specific business for a specific reason. It takes work, but the fruits of that labour are going to be measurable. Instead, a “Buy Nothing Day” allows for lots of catchy slogans and whining about a %on-

sumer-driven

sdcie$’

with

no red

direction.

’ I hope I have the opportunity to give that small corner store some of my business on November 29th. I will do what I can to help support that store, and the ody thing that I can say for sure that I won’t buy on November 29th is a copy of-em.

The University of Waterloo Student Newspaper Frkby

November

22,1996

Student rJfe Centre, Room 1116 Ihiversity of Waterloo Waterloo, Ontario N2L 3Gl

Editorial Editor in Chief Assistant Editor Forum

Editor

News Editor News Assistant Arts Editor Arts Assistant Sports Editor Sports Assistant %;eatures Editor Science Editor Photo Editor Photo Assistant WWW Page Editor Systems Administrator Proofreaders

Advertising

Marea Willis Laurie

Advertising/Production

Assistant

WWW:

Tiger&Dumas

Tasmina Pate1

Distribution Jeff Robertson James Russell

Fax: 519-884-7800 ditcb~imp~t.uwa~l~.ca http://~p~~uwaterloo,ca

Board of Directors President Vice-President Secretary ,a Treasurer

Picken

Staff Business Manager

e-e

Sandy Atwal Ryan Chen-Wing Peter Lenardon Greg Krafchick James Russell Patrick Wilkins Jeff Peeters Ryan Pyette Tim Bondarenko Andrew Krywaniuk Gillian Downes Joe Palmer Klaus Steden Stephen Johnston Mary Ellen Foster Rob Van Kruistum Emily Bruner Bernhard Wall Mike Owen

19, Number

Ph: 519~888-404s

Board Greg

Volume

Director at Large Staff Liaison

James Russell Peter Lenardon Ryan Pyette David Lynch Jeff Peeters Jeff Robertson

Contribution

List

Mike Buehner, Heather Calder, Reni Chan, Franziska Decker, Derek Dupuis, Matt Feldman, Daniel German, Chris Green, Kelly Foley, Karsten W. Gitter, Jennifer Harrison, Deanna Hlywka, Paul Holloway, Andrew Isherwood, Niels Jensen, Andy Kaczynski, Andrew Kennedy, Jason Kirby, Melissa MacDonald, Tony Martins, Justin Matthews, Kelly McMaster, Julie Primeau, Ma& Rankin, Tara Schagena, Bill Wh&ie, Paul York, Dan Zachariah, WPIRG, The Parking Lot is Full

Imprint is the official student newspaper of the University of Waterloo. It is an editorially independent newspaper published by Imprint Publications, Waterloo, acorporation without share capital.Imptit is a member of the Ontario Community Newspaper Association (OCNA). Imprint is published every Friday during fall and winter terms, and.every second Friday during the spring term. Imprint reserves the right to screen, edit, and refuse advertising. Imprint ISSN 0706-7380. Mail should be addressed to Imprint, Student Life Centre, Room 1116, University of Waterloo, Ontario, N2L 3Gl.

Imprint welcomes letters to the editor from students and all members of the community. Letters should be 500 words or less, typed and double-spaced or in electronic form, and have the author’s name, signature, address and phone number for verification. Letters received via electronic mail must be verified with a signature. All material is subject to editing for brevity and clarity. The editor reserves the right to refuse to publish letters or articles which are judged to be libellous or discriminatory on the basis of gender, race, religion or sexual orientation. Opinions expressed are those of the individuals and not of Imprint.

Library voices talking Tu the E&m, This letter is in response to Raymond Vander Veen’s letter of October 18 expressing concern about the Library’s current security system. Over the years, the Library has considered electronic detection systems, most recently in the context of the University Map and Design Library (UMDL). Because UMDL currently has no security system and is experiencing a significant loss of material, we will soon install an electronic detection system in that facility. However, for a variety of reasons we are not now able to move in this direction in Dana Porter or the Davis Centre. A primary reason for maintaining the current security arrangement is its compatibility with self-charge, the service that enables users in Porter and Davis to charge out library ma<eria.ls for themselves. Waterloo is one of the few libraries that provide self?harge and it’s a service highly valued by students and others; to date, there are no electronic detection systems on the market compatible with the seK charge module that we have. This may, however, change as the library moves to a new circulation system and as vendors of electronic detection systems continue to enhance their products. Because self-charge is not now available in UMDL, the lack of compatibility is not an issue for that facility. The availability of a suitable electronic detection system would not, however, be

the only factor the Library would have to consider in deciding whether or not to purchase one. Such systems are extremely expensive first of all to install (we would have to buy some two million magnetic strips and pay staff to insert them into books, not to mention tie cost of the equipment itself,) and then to operate (staff need to be available to respond to alarms, false and otherwise, and there are costs associated with maintaining any type of equipment.) Although we -are abie to fimd a relatively small scale electronic detection system in UMDL, the Library does not now have the resources necessary to do so in Porter and Davis, We would also have to consider the effectiveness of an electronic system compared to our current system. Comparisons based on experience at other libraries suggest that rates of loss are about the same as ours. Yes, there are ways of stealing despite the current security system, but there are also ways for a deliberate thief to fool an electro&c alarm. Once the new system is in place in UMDL we will have an opportunity to monitor its efEztiveness and to compare it with the system now operating in Davis and Porter. A system involving human attendants does not involve “assumption of guilt” any more than a electronic detection system does. Both systems do deter thieves, but they also detect books that are being taken out of the library accidentally. Attendants can direct an absent-minded user back to the circulation desk without any of the embarrassment that raults from activating ” analarm. We’re sorry that some users feel their

privacy is being invaded by the inspection asthey leave the Library. Attendants, many of whom are UW students, are generally too busy to pay attention to the contents of a user’s bags, other &an library materials, and of course a respect for privacy is expected of them.

,The

way Ball bounces

To t..Editw, The &to&r 16, 1996 Gazette included an article written by Dr. N&man Ball, entitled The crucial first week in engineering.” In this article, Dr. Norman Ball finds yet another reason why engineers and engineering students are substandard humans, accidentally omitting a few points and fUdging some arguments along the way. It was a very entertaining read, but considering the possibility of some readers

Pete

Nesbitt

believing this nonsense, I feel forced to respond with some truth and a few facts. I will then demonstrate how his method of assessment of the treatment of engineering students is humourously wrong, questioning his credibility as an objective observer along the way. For completeness, I might as we&dso point out the parts where Dr. Ball contradicts himself. As an engineering student with four work terms of experience, I h&e observed several different work environments. One thing, however, was common to all of these. Communication, or more generally, interaction, was clearly crzdal to the successofthese businesses. Logically, it would follow that interaction should be a crucial part of any university education, and that learning to work with people is as important as learning to work with numbers. In this next little tidbit of insight, I speak not only for myself, but for at least 20 of my peers who have shared remarkably similar stories with me.

and

Pat

cohtinued

to page

Spacek

Like many spirits that die without having accomplished their earthly tasks, Charlie the goldfish returned to our world to haunt the living. Unfortunately for Charlie, nobody could determine what those tasks were, so now everyone pretty much ignores him.

FORUM

IMPRINT,

Friday, November

22, 1996

Tenants, know your rig$ds The laws they are a changin’ by Paul York special to Imprint

ou’ve probably heard that the Provincial government is trying to get rid of the Rent Conaol Act, to make it easier for landlords to raise your nit. What does this mean for you, if y&‘re a tenant? Under the proposed legislation, if a tenant moves out his or her apartment the rent will io longer be controlled for the next tenant who moves in. This would give landlords an incentive to harass you out of your apartment in order to get a higher price for it. It will really happen if the Tories get their way; it happens everyday in Toronto’s warehouse districts where tenants pay rent but are not protected under the Landlord-and-Tenant Act because of municipal zoning by-laws. So why do you need rent control? The current laws states that no legal rent can be increased by more than 3Oh per year (of what you pay now) above the guideline (in 1996 the rent control guideline is 2.8%). The Tories wanr to allow building owners to charge up to 4% rent increases above the guidelines for repair work, Tenants will be pressured into signing renovation agreements which will result in rent increases. Can it happen to you? The lust for money does strange things to people. Some land-

lords can’t wait for the end of rent controls: one landlord in Mississauga put up a sign in his building that said, ccRent Control is gone! Januarv 1 all tenants get a rent increase,” but io new law has been passed. The Landlord-and-Tenant Act protects you (and your landlord) in all sorts of ways. The Tories are trying to undermine that Act as well. Al Leach, the Housing Minister, at one meeting with landlords, prom-

Among the hurdest hit will be students. ised them he will gut the Landlord-andTenant Act to “make it easier to evict tenants.” The Tories want a new tribunal svstem to handle all landlord and tenant disputes. This will make it easier for landlords to evict their tenants, Tenants deserve the right to a fair and speedy hearing. That right will not be possible to secure and enforce under proposed legislation. The Rental Housing Protection Act is also under fire. This law protects tenants from losing their homes by limiting the conversion or demolition of affordable rental housing. If the Tories gc their way

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people who pay their rent can be evicted at a moment’s notice to make way for higher paying tenants; they c&l have their heat shut off in winter to force them out; their rent can double at any time. There is no guarantee of safety or property maintenance and those who join a tenants’ group are ofien intimidated into silence. Our current housing laws protect us from all that. The warehouses, where such things happen, provide us with a prophetic vision of housing without laws. They exist in the Hobbsean “State of Nature” where it’s every man for himself( and the government against all). Now I admit Harris is not proposing to eradicate all the laws--just a lot of important ones! Harris’ so-called “Tenant Protection Package” (an Orwellian doublespeak term) will do the opposite of “protecting tenants because it will damage or destroy the Rent Control Act, Rental Housing Prkection Act and Landlord and Tenant Act. Harris et al are really working for a special interest group, the organized landlord lobby. The Tories werenotevenelected on the platform of changing rent control! (Ishou.ldnotethatnotal.lland.lordsarepart of this lobby which is dominated by slumlords; in fact, most: landlords are decent good people who get along with their WJxu-l~). The loss of rent control will resuk in social disaster, causing of great hardship for those who can least &ord it. But are the changes justified on other grounds? There is a myth that rent control causes rental housing shortages and building slumps. It assumes that private landlords cannot afford to build new apartment buildings * because of rent control. Before 1985, u&s costing $750 a month or more were not rent controlled. Still, landlords did not build enough of this “high-end” rental hou.Gng. Even now, with a five-year exemption from rent control on new units, developers are not building. David Hulchanski, a housing expert at the University of Toronto, points out that the private sector has not built enough affordable rental housing in provinces with no history of rent control. The private efforts, while noble do not meet the demand for safe, secure and fiordable housing. Additionally, as stated above, this shortage cannot be blamed on rent control. Andthereisanethicalargumentagainst rent control, arguing instead for m&et control and government deregulation. From this perspective, private efforts, such asHabitat for Humanity or privately fiu&d co-ops, are a good alternative to govern*

ment subsidies and fmancing. This is pm of the larger question: what is the proper role of government? To this I can only respond by saying that regulation is necessary to prevent social evils from occurring and, in my opinion, gent&cation (the forcible displacement of persons by market forces) is such an evil. It causes suffering by infringing on the “security of tenuren of the tenant, as well as the homeowner who cannot afford a sudden property tax increase. By the time you read this, proposed changes will have been read in provincial parliament. If you are a tenant it is in your best interest to oppose these changes. There is a good chance that with enough tenam participation, the attacks on laws which protect tenants can be reversed. What

you

can do

. Call, fax or write Elizabeth Witmer, Tory MPP at 725-4377 fax: 725-3667 375 University E. Waterloo, UN N2K 3M7, to let her know how you feel about the proposed changes. l Join your local tenants’ association (or start one!) . Join the Waterloo Region Tenants’ Coalition The Waterloo Region Tenants’ Caalition is a pro-active group of volunteers which was formed to provide a collective voice for tenants and to address the needs of local tenants. The Coalition seeks to assist tenants to organize into associations and to educated them with regard to tenant rights and responsibilities. One of its goals is to bring together tenants from all parts of the Waterloo Region to discuss and take common positions on issues affecting tenants. If you are a tenant and wish to take part contact Sue Taylor at 744-3032 or call me at 579-2628 or e-mail me at tpyan&@atia2). Temmts’

Rights

It’s important to know what your rights and responsibilities are. Under the Landlord-and-Tenant Act, tenants have the right: l To have their home kept in a good state of repair, up to the property standards set by local bylaws, fire and health codes. *To get 24 hours written notice before the landlord enters their residence, except in an emergency or where the tenant has agreed. l To a 6% interest payment on their last month’s rent deposit, to be paid once every year by the landlord. . Only the court may make the decision to evict you. You have a right to dispute the court’s decision.

Tenanti’

Respozisibilities

To pay the rent on the day it’s due. To keep their homes reasonably clean and to repair or pay for any damages they or their guests cause to their unit or the building. l To not interfere with the reasonable elljoymcnt, or endanger the safety, of other tenants. l To get the landlord’s agreement before changing or adding locks. l To give required written notice before they intend to move out. l l

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who hved cmapaars and caMus, but was lacking a bit on the so&l side. HE was awkward& shy3md unable to intmxt soch@y with anyone but hisgood fitmd. T;ben he went to W~ttmim, and one week later, wasahappier,~eco~~t permn, T’h sly~ss that impmkd his communication with others wasfmevtvyone. It wits thebest week of his 1fe.

The observant reader who remembers all the silly things Dr. Ball wrote about frosh week will have noticed that they do not appear in this little story. The engineering frosh who was the subject of the story (let’s call him Steve) gladly participated in the voluntary (yes, voluntary) activities. Steve had a great time playing in the mud with his new friends, despite all the ati stories he had heard in high school. “Friends a year or two older told her about first week. It sounded sick to her.” Dr. Ball wrote about a young woman who decided against engineering. It sounded sick to Steve, too. Steve, however, tried it anyway, and found it to be one of the best experiences of his life. It taught him not to be “closed-minded”, another trait that characterizes engineers in the eyes of Dr. Ball. Steve was never told that artsies suck, and when he became a frosh leader three years later, discouraged any such behaviour. In summary, Engineering Fresh Week is fun; All activities are voluntav; Engineering fresh week promotes confidence, interaction and open-mindedness. One might wonder how a well educated and highly respected man such as Dr. Ball could be so completely wrong in his assessment OfEngineering Frosh Week. A careM inspection. of his article would reveal that Dr. Ball did not speak to even one engineering student. He quotes high school students who have heard horror stories about engineering, and an engineer-writer, Samuel Florman,’ who writes YVe can’t have engineers coming out as technical nerds,” but no engineering students. He writes, speaking about students, “But nothing beats learning from peers,” and speaks to ;L. total ofzero engineering students. The opinions of- the high school students may have be& formed by reading dated portrayals of engineering like the one found in Dr. Ball’s article. As for Samuel Florman’s writing, it actualiy reinforces my argument: engineers simply can not be technical nerds. They must learn to interact with others. They do learn to interact with others. They learn in Frosh Week, Dr. Bali

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22, I996

would know this if he did his research. Maybe he does know it, but wants to convey a different message. ’ It is evident to any engineering student I have ever mer, who has had Dr. Ball as a professor, that he simply doesn’t like engineers or engineering. Asking him for an objective opinion about engineering is like asking a Dolphins fan for an objective opinion about the Bills. He is, in my opinion, the rudest, most opinionated man I’ve ever met. Maybe if he’d had the opportunity to go through the same Frosh Week I did, he wouldn’t be that way. And by the way, Dr. Ball,+ what in a photo of two guys smiling, do you think, warrants writing “. . .apparently glorifjring in the dirt they bore?” Apparent? I don’t think so. Did you speak to either of them? No. I think you owe them an apology.

Turner mistaken To te Editor, Considerable controversy has been generated by L. Turner’s letter printed in the October 25 issue of Imprint. I was very glad to see in following issues that other people had a hard time agreeing with L.-Turner’s opinion of Adolf Hitler, his CCbrownshirts” and the “political situation in Germanyofthe 192Osand 1930s.” In his response, L. Turner accuses these critics as “counting on a misled, duped, naive citizenry to believe their drivel.” That, however, is exactly what L, Turner seems to rely on in regard to his expertise on Nazi-German politics. How else could he possibly propose that Hitler worked with the “full support of the German people. . .to give the government

back to the people?” A closer look at %e professional propaganda,” better known to the rest of the world as history books, might have changed Turner’s mind. Sure, Hitler was legally elected chancellor in 1933, but what followed had nothing to do with “giving government to the people.” In 1933, Hitler convinced President Hindenburg to pass the “Decree for the protection of state and people” and only two months later Hitler introduced the &Enabhg Act.” As a result, Hitler’s party had assumed total power over all aspects of government, eliminating the free press and human rights, enabling Hitler to pass laws at will. Germany had become a single party state, *ctively taking any and d power away from the people, contrary to L. Turner’s statement. You are absolutely right, L. Turner, ‘%he brownshirts were there,” everywhere. But not “so that German men and women could once again have freedom of expression, and

to assemble and speak their views.” No, these brownshirts were instruments of terror, acting either as members of Hitler’s personal army, the SA, or his elitist tmdy guards and feared killers, the SS. Not to mention the notorious Gestapo, the ever present, allknowing secret service and the Special Peoples’ Courts whose judges were directly appointed by the Flier. Therefore, the only views being expressed were those of the Nazis, and those who dared to stray from that view were quickly silenced in the concentration camps. Turner’s adoption of Hitler’s assessment of the politician’ s position as one of a holy calling raises the issue of Hitler3 political competence. Hitler essentially set out to accomplish two things as part of his master plan: world domination by Germany, and extermination of the Jewish race. Fortunately, he failed miserably

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in both regards. At the end of the war, Germany was not only smaller than ever before, but had also been divided into two separate states. The entire country lay in ruins and its fate in the hand of the allies. Sure, along the way, 4.5 million jobs had been created, but these jobs were mainly generated in preparation of the war: massive construction of streets, bridges and buildings and an enormous investment in the armament industry. By 1939, the Nazis had spent 30 billion dollars on armament!! Similarly, the German army, despite of restrictions to a maximum of200,OOO men by the Treaty of Versailles, had quadrupled in size by 1935. When Hitler finally realized that his troops were fighting a lost battIe, he focused his intentions on his second goal, the extermination of the Jews. The horror of this “final solution” to the “Jewish problem” is well documented and need not be repeated here. But if L. Turner considers the holocaust one of those “shop-worn lies about that period of history,” T strongly suggest a trip to Germany to pay a visit to one of the many concentration camps. In conclusion then, LTurner rightMy denunciates “ir&mmatory accusations” against him. However, there is a distinct difference between “political correctness in regard to Adolf Hitler” and utterignoranceofthehistoricalfacts. Unlike Germans under Nazi rule, L.Turner has a right to his own view and expression of it. However, a consideration ofthe facts might have been advisable before making that

Complain where it counts To t&wEditor, To the Derson who took it uDon themselves to deface all of the &m media advertising bonds in the SLC bathroom, huh? So you stuck stickers reading, ‘This space should be ad free,” on each and every frame. Surely there is a less cowardly method of complaint than vandalism. Yes, there has been some difference of opinion over the presence of this advertising in the bathroom. If the argument that the company is in support of a Canadian and brings revenue directly to your student centre don’t wash with you, that is fine. You prefer the invasion of privacy and the, “coerced into reading,” angle. So do I. So does the gentleman from to the Islam society who came to the Turnkey desk to tell me off for the presence of this advertising. His interest seemed to be in being irate with me rather than realizing that this decision in fact has nothing to do with me, and needs addressing at hi&er levels. Not to justify it, but the advertising decision has been made to supply revenue to the Student Life Cent&. in a time when money is tight. If you so not agree with

IMPRINT,

this, please do something proactive. Take the time to find out whose decision this was and what you can do with your power in a consmdve manner to m&e a change ifit matters to you. If you are a student then it isyour student centre and it is your right to express vou desires and preferences. Howevkr, it ii also the centrelbelonging to many other students. and not vours to deface according to &ur whims: Vandalism is not the a&we;. It was me who had to stand and scrub the stickers from all the posters. So, all your little method achieved was to make tie a little cranky on a Sunday morn-

The truth

Friday, November

22, 1996

Even though I agreed with your feelings, I think there is a better way to actkeiy, positively get your message out tid toWh&611y make a change. Pleas;, if’ you have an opinion, if you care about something, ifyou want it changed take UP a cause and make a difference. After all, I bkt more people see this than your few oranee stickers. Maybe there is a wider audi&ce out there ;r’iUing to join your cause if+you take a different angle. B&t of luck!

- SandkEdwla~

is riot there

deep question has been bothering me lateiy. If a politician holds an media event, and nobody shows up, would the rhetoric sound s;> hollow? As a political science student and a quasi-journalist, I have an acquired distaste for politicians and the phoney sort of clisplay of this past Tuesday. Fed Hall was a forest of gray hair and blue suits as Jean Charest, the latest white male lawyer from Quebec who wants to become prime minister, was in town to put in an appearance with the local party faiMG.l and to make a few bucks selling a coffee and a mufEn for $12. The Progressive Conservative leader’s speech was your standard polspeak. All of the bad stuff in Canada today is due to the current Liberal government and all of the good stuEis due to policies started by the PCs when they were-in power before, The tory book of promises1 ‘Toward a better this and that in the future for &ada etc.” is better than the new Liberal red book sequel. There was no useM or insighti tiormation of any-kind. A few young tories were wearing tshirts endorsing a local candidate. Instead of toy blue, these shirts were hipster black. Apparently the young people like that. The

front of the shirt displayed a PC party logo that looked curiously ‘like the KFC emblem on- my last bucket of chicken. Just a coincidence? Well, the back of the shirt displayed an obvious X-Files rip-off with the (likely copyrighted) phrase “The Truth is Out There,” and an X beside the candidate’s name. That has to go down asone of the great political slogans ofall time. “Liberte, egalite, fraternite,” “No taxation without representation,” and now, ‘The truth is out there,” Is this Canadian politics? One of our country% founding national parties now rips off a popular television show on t-shirts. What is this, frosh week? The worst part of the whole exercise was the love-in aspect. Nobody was critical of Charest, AU of the questions were pathetic lobs, served up so Charest could smash a stock answer back down the throats of the ftithfkl. And they gobbled it up. There were standing ovations and applause anyone could anticipate before he even finished his sentence. And what about the media in all of this? We were there with tape recorders ready. Why? There was no news.

So I go to see John Ralston Saul give the Hagey Lecture on Wednesday night. I walk into Hagey Hall, excited at the prospect of seeing a writer I admire. Before I go any further, I must say that my philosphical learning is slight. Being an accounting student, my chances for getting a truly well-rounded education are few. But I do try. So bear with me. So rrn reading the program, waiting for the event to start. I read a bunch of stuff in the program that I already know about Saul. I get down to reading the details of the program, to kill time. “Members ofthe Hagey Lectures Committee,” the program says. The first five names are ones that I don’t recognize. The -last is one that Ilve come to know in the past week. Judy Wubnig. Now, I don’t mean to beat a dead horse. There are letters this week about her, and there were letters last week. But this is just too much. She is the Arts faculty representative

asked Saul what he thought of student participation in unviersity administration during the question and answer session. Unfortunately, Saul deftly avoided giving a firm answer on the question, as he’s done on many others. That was a disappointment. But I think I’m on pretty firm ground when I say that this is exactly the sort of attitude that Saul would abhor. So let’s go with the charitable explanation for all of this, First, that Wubnig, as someone who teaches philosophy, was so willing to challenge her ideas that she endorsed the decision to invite Saul as the Hagey Lecturer. That is, with some knowledge of what his ideas are. A distinct possibility. In fact, I’m really, really hoping that this is the case. And second, that Saul had not picked up Imprint when he got to Waterloo and made the connection between this condescending professor’s letter and one of the people essentially paying his fee, and therefore didn’t give a firm answer on the question because of his nature, rather than the context. This too is adistinct pussibiky. Pm really, really hoping this is the case. More than anything, I hope that Saul’s lecture showed Wubnig the implications of what she was saying, and why she might want to reconsider her views. I wouldn’t want to otherwise add to the fLror with yet another ignorant point of view.

on the

Hagey

Lectures

Committee.

She

also wrote iast week that %e very basis of a university” is that “those with education are better qualified than those who are not.” The rest of her letter was ftied with statements of a similarly condescending nature. Going back to the lecture, Sandy Atwal

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November

22, 1996

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When I’m dating a man I eniov certain want our sexualitv to be an issue in custodv ‘Lprivileges’y that I donot have wl-ren I’m in battles, as it currdntly is. The excuse given for stealing our children is “they’ll face a relationship with a woman. So what do gay people want? Brace discrimination.” This is also a reason many yourself, the list is lengthy: We want the people cite for why we should be denied adoption rights. same respect heterosexuals get. We want to be safe from violence and job and housSO what if our kids will face discrirniing discrimination. We want the same nation? Black kids face discrimination too, employment benefits and pensions that does that mean that black people shouldn’t straight couples enjoy. We want legal rec- be allowed to adopt? Our sexuality has ognition ofour families. There is currently nothing to do with our ability to love and a huge debate going on in the gay communurture a child. The latest edition of nity concerning gay marriages. Whether Newswek features a story on gay families. it’s termed marriage or “life partnership,” Melissa Etheridge, the renowned lesbian I really don’t care,but I want some soiof singer, and her partner Julie Cypher are legall? recognized long-term relationship shown on the cover under the heading contract so that we can have access to all ‘We’re having a Baby.” the perks married couples enjoy, like the Inside a recent poll states that six in ten tax breaks. Americans think that gay men and women There are so many legal issues, like can be just as good at parenting as whom estates go to, what recourse we heterosexuals. This is enco&aging; howhave ifour lover takes our child away, or a ever, 47 percent the people polled-said we disproportionate amount of our mutual should be denied adoption rights. There is possessions, tier a breakup. We don’t still much work to be done. Because lesbians and gay men are discriminated against in employment and housing and because how we act is more important than who we are and if we get harassed it’s our problem and if we get attacked we provoked it and if we raise our voices we’re flaunting ourselves and if we enjoy sex we’re pen/erts and if we have AIDS we deserve it and if we march with pride we’re recruiting children and if we stand up for our rights we are overstepping our boundaries and if we don’t have a heterosexual relationship we haven’t given it a chance and if we love someone of our own sex we’re just going through a phase. And because our relationships are not acknowledged and we’re told our love is not real and if we’re out of the closet we get bashed and/or murdered and if we want children we’re unnatural and if we have them our families are not legally recognized and because lesbian and gay existence has been written out of her/history and homophobia is sanctioned by the police and courts and. . .for lots and lots and lots of other reasons, I am part of the gay and lesbian liberation movement.- Anonwwus

WPIRC

The incredible stupidity and disgusting actions of Qutbtcois politicians continue to astound me. As if Bill 10 1 wasn’t repulsive enough, the PQ have just announced new measures intended to protect the French language in Quebec. Let’s remember for just one second that the Anglophone population in Quebec is just ten percent, yet PQ politicians continue to insist that ‘&French is a threatcried language in Quebec.” And so, in their delusions and paranoia, the PQ have taken steps to protect their language by cracking down on the “rampant institutional bilinguilism which has crept into the civil service,” according to Language blinister Louise Beaudoin. One prominent Quebec English-language rights group estimates that this %.mpant institutional bilinguilism” constitutes about one percent of the civil service. The rest is Francophone. With the new policies, civil servants do not ever need to learn one word of English. It is no longer considered in any way an asset. It is not required to be hired or promoted. Civil servants need to obtain special permission to give any speeches in English, and government dealings with Quebecbased companies will be in French only. Anglophone companies wilI not get government contracts. Government pamphlets will be printed only in French, and civil servants will be required to speak only in French when dealing with the public in person or over the telephone. Besides the obvious short-sighted paranoia inherent in any attempt to legislate permanency in a language, these policies are wrongu for manv J reasons.

Obviously, any legitimate company should be equally eligible when the government tenders out a contract, regardless of what language that company speaks in its office. That is, in fact, the basic principle behind the idea of tendering out. And Quebec incessantly complains about being oppressed by the rest of Canada, but while you’ll find French on a can of Coke in Vancouver, you won’t be able to find an English-speaking operator in the Quebec civil service. The hypocrisy makes me nauseous. And as if that wasn’t enough, the provincial government attempts to lure business investors by billing Montreal as a “bilingual and cosmopolitan” city! Why? I’ll tell you why. The PQ Ieadership knows as well as anybody with halfa brain that the language of business around the globe is English! They can’t attract foreign investors by touting the fact that they’re so goddam French they’ve passed laws that got condemned by the United Nations. The scary thing is, many are complaining that these measures are not enough. Some Quebec politicians want to make it illegal to display English anywhe~ on a commercial sign. ‘They don’t think an anglophone business owner in an anglophone community should have that right. They also want to discuss +-t/~r restrictions on access to English schools and postsecondary institutions. Quebec politi cians continue to propagate the idea that English Canada is intolerant and hateful towards French Canadians, but the complete opposite is true. I’d much rather Quebec separate than see it continue on its present course, where PQ language Nazis set the agenda to oppress minority language rights.

Privatization - Not always good Despite what the Conservative government in Ontario thinks, privatization is not always good. In the wake of the Environment and Energy Minister Norm Sterling’s announcement that the Ontario Clean Water Agency is to be privatized, reports from Britain mar the notion of the positive benefits of privatization. The Ontario Clean Water Agency (OCWA) is the Crown corporation providing water and sewage-treatment services for millions of people in Ontario. It is a service company holding long- term contracts with municipalities to operate their water and sewage treatment plants, According to Mr. Sterling, privatization of this agency would consist of selling the rights to operate and manage the corporation. Essentially, privatization is the act of selling a public corporation to the private sector, which then takes over operational duties. Commonly cited benefits of privatization include: increased efficiency; economies of scale; and capital investment to repair infrastructure that the public sector cannot afford. Privatization of the Ontario Clean Water Agency must be seen as a lucrative venture, as some companies are so keen to buy the OCWA that Minister Sterling is being badgered at fiznctions by individuals interested in making bids. In contrast, Britain’s experience with

privatized water companies is marked with claims that prices have risen at three times the rate of inflation and accusations of blatant profiteering, Critics not only include opponents of the British Conservative government. The head of the government’s Environmental Agency, Edward Gallagher, said that the water industry had lost public support since privatization. One major problem is prosecution of water companies for environmental damage - on average, a water company has been-found -guilty in court every &eb weeks. Rising water piices is another contentious issue. In B&&n, one company racked up a 60 percent profit last year, fuelled partly by a 400 percent hike in water rates after privatization. In many areas water meters have been introduced where thev previously did not exist. There are claim\ that low-income families have had to ration their usage, thus creating a health risk. An example of inefficiencies in the face of increased prices comes from Yorkshire where a record profit was made in 1995, while clients suffered through a severe water shortage caused by drought, and water had to be trucked in from southern England, With a decreasing public sect&, protection of common resources are increas ingly becoming the responsibility of private companies - is this in the public’s best interest?

By Kelly Foley, Vice President Education The views in this column don’t necessarily represent you or me. If you agree or disagree with the views expressed here then let me know. Speak for yourself! kcfoley@feds.watstar.uwaterloo.ca or ext. 2340

On location from Ottawa, the nation’s capital. I’m sitting in the Canadian Alliance of 5itudent Associations, CASA, offrce in Ottawa. I’m hoping that you are aware that CASA is your national lobby group. It’s hard to describe what CASA is and what it does. Since I’ve been here wondering what to write in my column, a plethora of activity is being calmly managed by the two CASA staff, the National Director and the Executive Research Officer. First, Irving, the researcher, is.on the phone with a VP from McGill because the Quebec government announced that they will be charging higher tuition for out of province

students.

Then CBC called and wanted an interview with Matt, the National Director. Matt’s in Edmonton speaking to member student councils. Irving arranges to have the interview done in Alberta and goes back to hanging provincial crests on the Wd.

While Irving has popped out to get me an aspirin, the president from the Students’ Union in Calgary calls because he needs a meeting room in Ottawa to interview a

candidate for a job. Upon Irving’s return, he books the room. Then the Canadian Senate calls about CAM’s presentation next week. Irving makes the necessary arrangements in French and then asks me if I like the new web page he built, What does CASA do? Emything. I know it’s hard to seethat from Waterloo, and it’s ticult to show you that. The point is that this is yotlr organization. It’s power in numbers, it’s the turnkey desk of Canadian educational issues, it’s a resource for student union executives and students, it’s your voice. I leave you with a quote from Matt Hough, the National Director, “CASA is a grassroots, consensus-based organization that takes its direction from councils through the student executive of student associations. There is nothing that we do, or could do without the consent of those others to enhance the lobby effort. This is done on an issue to issue basis. CASA respects the autonomy of its member associations. MUNG respect is a prerequisite for effective communication. We represent our members with respect.

Combating the Big Guys Socialists encourage the world to “overthrow the evil empire” by Paul Baines special to Imprint

re you tired of being a consumer, a customer, a shopper, a buyer? Are you sick of being asked to consume whenever you turn on the TV and radio, or open the paper, or even open your pants in the SLc’s washroom?

Buying a house on a deserted island is one solution, the other is saying to yourself ‘LForget it, I’m not a bottom line, a market, or an advertiser’s target. I’ve got more depth than any beer, car, or condom commercial can ever match.” Luckily, Friday, November 29 is BIN NOTHING DAY. The idea is to participate without participating. Why? Because as a

consumer you have a lot of power and should be able to show it offonce a year. ReaIize your independence from the consumer society we live in, buy nothing for one whole day and say “up yours” to all the market research and salespeople you’ve been sold bYBUYNOTHING DAY on November 29 is more than just running out of money at the end of the month or ietting your friend to buy you lunch. It might be an inconvience or take some planning, but iet’s look at the positive side. Geez, no buying? What to do? No craving? What to think? Here’s a few ideas you can try: l Turn off commercial radio cw TV stations (I think CFNY FM stands for Commercial Frequency Needed You For Marketing). l Call a friend for a lengthy conversation. l How many advertisements do I see a dav? l Why does Iife on TV always seem better? l Try creating your own drama, sitcom, or play your own music. l North Americans spend billions of dollars on weight loss, while millions of people die from starvation. l Write a letter to some nasv corporation and complain (like toothpaste manufactures for those wasteful boxes), l Read something about real-life, not celebrities, fashion, or professional sports. . Do I Iike being advertised to while taking a dump? l What kind of car reflects who I am or who I want to be? . If people reaUy need lots of new stuff, why is advertising a multibillion dollar business? l Try ripping up ads and making new ones that reflect your reality. l Make your lunch and dinner with your own food and hands. . Why does a half hour news program show only 10 minutes of news and 20 minutes of sports, weather

and entertainment?

1 Why aren’t cars advertised in traffic jams? l Why do people take elevators for 3 fights of stairs and then go to step aerobics? . If advertisers are paying billions of dollars to get my attention, what product is being sold?

l What things give you happiness and can’t be bought or sold off a billboard? l Why are commercials louder than the TV programs? l How many advertisements do you have to see before they affect vou? -0Will you hear about this event in any other media outlet? A recent story in Adbu~-~.s responded to a poll that asked people cLH~~ much money do you need to be happy?” The most

ING DAY is to promote consumer independence and examine consumerism asNorth Arnerican’s # 1 environmental problem. So there you have it. The intro and explanation of November 29’sBUY NOTHING DAY. To celebrate the event, WPIRG is having a spoof ad contest. A what you ask? Spoof ads are ads that parody real ads. They look like real ads, but their m&sage is always diRerent, usualIy the-absurdity-of the original. Shoof ads use

common

the tool of advertising

answer?

“Twice

as much

to subvert

as I have now.” The person’s wealth was irrelevant as she/he usually wanted more. People believe that happiness comes with excess and thus, waste. ConsiderBUY NOTHING DAY like a fast. Restrict yourself from the everyday to put buying into perspective. The old saying, ‘vou don’t know what you’ve got till it’s gone,” sort of holds true. Let’s face it, being a consumer has

market researchers and empower people for deconstructing’ commercial messages and constructing their own. If you’ve readAdbusters from the VV!I?IRG office or Turnkev desk, you already know what we’6 talking about. If you remember the ad that wouldn’t run in last winter’s Imprint you came close to seeing a spoof of a Mazda ad that also ran inImprint. So here’s

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wo of the greatest problems facing modern science are the questions of the origin of life and the origin and age of the universe. The Rig Bang theory is the currently accepted story of the birth of the universe. It apparently make. wonderful mathematical sensealthough questions about what was around before the Bang are troublesome. However, given that the only alternative is that the universe was created by an omnipotent being who apparently felt like creating life, scientists generally agree that the Big Bang is the best theory going right now. Scientists are able to gain a lot of information by measuring the composition of the Earth. The concentration of various radioactive isotopes allows geologists to guess the age of our planet. By all accounts, it would appear that the Earth is all of approximately four billion years old. Quite a length of time, and that certainly puts our measly twenty thousand years of recorded history into perspective. The use of radioactive isotopes for dating is not uncommon. You have no doubt heard of Carbon I4 dating which is used on fossils. Carbon 14 levels fluctuate from time to time (recently, due to nuclear fallout) but the concentrations inside tree rings provide scientists with a convenient benchmark. The first recorded use of radioactive dating occurred when Gyorgy I-Ievesysuccessfullyproved that his landlady’s pie was a week old. He had slipped some radioactive thorium into the leftovers of his dinner the week before in order to prove that she was recycling food (of course, it is debatable whether it is more dangerous to consume unrefrigerated fmd or traces of thorium.) The use of radioactive dating on a cosmic scale is different because we don’t always know the starting concentrations of the isotopes. Thus, we must compare our measured values to our cosmological models. Something we would like to know is exactly when l&e arose on this planet and whether we are unique. Experiments with a simulated primordial soup being struck by lightning showed that amino acids, often known asthe building blocks

of life,

arise in a matter

weeks. We have found small micro-organisms in every sort of hostile environment including 175 degree heat, hundreds of atmospheres of pressure, and normally lethal radiation levels. All signs indicate that life should be ftirlv

common throughout the universe, but we have never had any direct evidence of alien life until recently. The discovery uras not a scnsationalistic confirmation of government cover-ups or alien abductions, but the mere announcement that traces of life had been discovered in a meteorite of Martian ancestry. The allegation that ALH84001 is ofMartimorigin is virtually unquestioned; the makeup of the rock matches soil samples from Mars beyond a reasonable doubt. The evidence of life is on shakier ground, but it is still promising. The claim depends upon certaintypesofmoleculescalledPAHs which were found inside the rock. Current wisdom holds that PAHs can only be created by life forms or during the early stages of star evolution. Critics aren’t so sure. Still, the discovery justifies furtherinvestigationoftheMartian surface, and it gives credence to such off-the-wall ideas as the panspermia hypothesis, the idea thatalllifemaynothaveoriginally developed on Earth. The age of the Martian microbes is thought to be about 3.6 billion years, less than the 3.85 billion years for which life has existed on Earth, but this does not preclude the possibility that even older meteorites may have carried the original seeds of life to Earth. To estimate the age of the universe, we will deftitely have to look to off-world sources of information. The most visible sources are the objects that you would be able to see every night if only the weather didn’t suck: stars. Cosmology, being the study ofstellar evolution, has taken great leaps forward in the past few decades. The mathematical predictions of steLlar models have allowed scientists to estimate the ages ofstars. These estimates have been performed for a variety of stars, and the most significant ages that were determined were those of some very old stars, whose ages were around 14 billion years. Now in case you had been wondering, the universe is still expanding due to the forces of the big bang. An astronomer named Edwin Hubble noticed that fxaway galaxies had Doppler shifts in their light spectra. Some calculations told the tale: the further away a galaxy is, the faster it is moving away from us! This little revelation also had a simple equation. An object that is 12 megaparsecs away is moving away at 12H km/set. This mystery value ‘H’ is now known as the Hubble Constant. In anutshell, the inverse of the Hubble Constant is the age of the universe. This should end the story,

that, odd as it seems, normal matter and particles will only give us Q = 0.19. This

Pink Floyd plays the dark side of the u.r&erse... right? Mer all, just measure the I%tbble Constant, and there we go, the universe is X years old. Except for one thing: the measurement of H: The values that scientists are putting forward vary from 50 to 90. A bit of a range, and one currently hotly debated in astrophysics. If you ever want to annoy a aosmologist, ask him or her why theHubble constant keeps on making the universe younger than the stars in it. Now moving on, we can have a look at the slowing of the expansion of the universe. You might be wondering why the universe is decelerating. Al%er all, there’s no friction in space, right? This is quite true, and there is a simple answer: gravity. If the universe is slowing down, then it must be a result of the mass of the universe pulling its outer edges to a halt and perhaps back in on itself. Once it was determined that the universe was slowing duwn, some troublemaker decided to calculate the density of the known universe, and compare it to the criticalvalue that w&d be needed for the universe to eventually slow down to a complete stop. If we divide the known density of the universe by the critical density, we get something known as L!. The value of Iz is quite important because it ties into the age of the universe through an equation that you will never have to lay your eyes on. Suffice it to say that for the age of the universe to be 15 billion years the value ofi should be 1. Unfortunately, measurements that have been made of the density of the university all tell us that i-2 = 0.1. This is a bit of a problem, and it leads us to wonder where all of this missing mass is? The accepted answer to this

is tie straightforward Pthat the matter we cannot see is dark matter: matter that emits no light, and thus could never be seen by our telescopes. This is a pretty intuitive answer, but what is this stufFthat we cannot see (and how are we going to find it?) One possible source of dark matter is everyone’s friend - the black hole. A black hole is an object with a density so great that light itself cannot escape the pull of its gravity* This is a tempting idea, and there have been one or two observations that seem to confirm that black holes etist, primarily in places where a black hole may be drawing matter from a nearby star. These super-dense objects are an ideal source of great amounts of mass, and their existence might help solve some other major questions. It is known that, according to all mathematical estimates, manv galaxies should be flying asthey lack the massto hold themselves together. Some theories explain &is extra mass by placing black holes at the centrei of these galaxies. While keeping things in the context ofnormal types of matter, we should also consider the idea of giant, non-luminous clouds ofgas in the universe. This is an enticing explanation, as it would provide smoother distributions Of mass than point masseslike black holes. The Soncept itself is quite plausible though the proof is lacking. Now we arrive at a kicker of a problem. Big Bang theory has actually advanced to the stage where we can estimate the amount of matter that was produced in the initial reaction. When the density is calculated, it becomes apparent tulate

leads us to postulate the existence of strange little particles like neutrinos and WIMPS, the mysterymenoftheuniverse.Most of these particles are difficult to detect, but we do know that some of them exist, and we must look at them to understand the density of our universe. The first big contender in the dark matter contest for unusual particles is the crafty little neutrino. A neutrino is a very small particle that is produced in a type of radioactive transaction known as beta decay. According to some estimates, there should be mounds of these particles in the universe and large numbers of them should be emanating from the sun. This is because the sun is continually burning off hydrogen as fuel in a never-ending thermonuclear reaction. And we know from a neutrino detector that was set up outside a nuclear pow& plant that these reactions should be producing neutrinos.

a great

number

Knowing these predictions, scientists decided it was time to check for these particles, and there were several neutrino detectors built to measure the little buggers as they pass through the earth. Unfortunately, the experiments unly detected twenty percent of thenumberofneutrinostbatshould have been coming from the sun. Later tests gave improved numbers, but they were still missing at least fifty percent ofthe number of neutrinos that were supposed to be present. So what was wrong with the piczre? Scientist took a closer look ai neutrinos and soon discovered a possible explanation. These particles were found in three forms. Umortunately, current detectors can only actually see one of the forms. Thus, if there are multiple forms emanating from the Sun, we will only see a fraction of what we were expecting. WIMPs, or Weakly Interacting Massive Particles, are essentially the cop out answer. There is an old clich6 that whenever physicists can’t explain something witfi existing theories they invent a new particle. WIMPS would provide a convenient source of mass without creating any other unexplainable side-effects. Cosmology and microbiology are still fields that contain many unanswered questions. But that, in part, is what keeps them fresh and interesting. In time, we may develop our unified theory of life, the universe, and everything, but by then we will have new questions to ask.

THE

Student Atlarge on Student Life CentreManagemen t Board. This Board, made up of UW Admin,FedsExec and a StudentAtLarge (undergrad) is the committee that runs the SLC. Any major items (big purchases, renovations, changesto policies,...) go through the Board,Thecorn mitteemeets monthly. Formoreinfo calI MarioBelfabarbaat ext, 2478.

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Warriors rule Kingston be updated to the Far Ahead of the Rest Division. Laurier, who’s not even picked to make the playoffs this year, is second behe Waterloo Hockey Warriors are like a motionhind the Warriors. In the other sensing water fountain. . three divisions, it’s business as Maybe you’re asking yourself usual. Last year’s Queen’s Cup how a hockey team can compare participants (Guelph, Laurentian, to such a technological appliance, and UQTR) all appear in control of their fates. but the rationale is simple: when the Warriors feel someone comBeing in this position is a ing, they turn it on. mixed blessing for any hockey Case in point: last weekend, team. The downfall of every great while on the Kingston Road Tour club results from something ‘96. The Warriors plucked the known asthe ‘Titanic Syndrome” Queen’s Golden Gaels, 6-l and (sc8DetitRed IV&&. This slayer rolled over the Royal Military of prospective CIAU dreams conCollege Redrnen like a tank, 9-3. tain the two primal fears of every At RMC, the Warriors played a hockey coach, the horrible state scoreless first twenty minutes, re- of “complacency’ and the dreaded alized they were in a game, and catch phrase “Peaked at the wrong poured in a five-spot in the sec- time.” ond frame. At Queen’s, Waterloo In Waterloo’s case, forgive stormed out to an early lead, al- the team if they take everything lowed the Gaels a semblance of one day at a time. After last searespectability, and then stamped son, fans expect the team to, at the out any hope of a comeback like a very least, return to the National forgotten bug by blasting home Title match, If that’s not pressure, three third ‘period biscuits. then throw in the fact that if the And since we’re in Kingston, Black and Gold do return to Mathe Tragically Hip’s “Nautical ple Leaf Gardens and don’t win, Disaster” best describes-how the then people are going to wonder Warriors flooded the scoreboard, what-in- Jim-Kelly?-name is goin’ sinking the two outfits from Don on? On this year’s club, the coachCherryland like a doomed ship. Similes and metaphors aside, ing staff is quick to name characthe Warriors are proving to be the ter and togetherness as the determinants of success. With an 8-l 1976 Montreal Canadiens (sorry, could& resist one more metarecord, there’s nothing really going wrong so the only thing to do phor) in their ability to explosively create out-of-reach contests. is hopethatnothingdoesfallapart.. However, there 4s a reason At 8-1, McKee’s Men are so far ahead of their divisional rivals the coaching stti stressescharacter and togetherness. These are that the Far West moniker should by Ryan “Pucks” Pyette Imprint staff

the very factors necessary to steal a gar& here, win another game there. These are the factors that ward off Titantic Syndrome and put a coach’s mind at ease for the rest of the season...if that’s possible. WARRIOR NOTES: The Warriors played their first test of the season yesterday here against Guelph, but results were unavailable at press time., .It was obvious from the Warriors’ dominance of Queen’s and RMC why the Grvphons own the best record in & &Mid East division Guelph gets to play RMC and the Golden Gaels more than anyone else..*You can forget about the scoring race intheOUAAthisyear.TheMcGill

Warriors 6 Queen’s 1 First Period 1. Warriors, Brearley (Cardiff, Chambers) (pp) 17:49. 2. Warriors, Brearley 2 (Smith, Goldie) 18:3X Second Period 3. Warriors, Chambers (Cardiff, Harris) (sh) 253. 4. Queen’s, Whaley (Dinsmore) 9: 15. . Third Period 5. Warriors, Goldie (Smith) 3:21. 6. Warriors, Chambers (Penalty Shot) s:03. 7. Warriors, Mundell (Palmer) 13:04. Saves: by Harris, Warriors-17118; by Deutsch, Queen’s-32MS. Penalty Minutes- Warriors-4, Queen’s-6.

Redmen’s Pierre Gendron has 3s: points, twice as many as Peter Brearleyand JeffGoldie’s 16. Mike Chambers rounds out the m top ten ! with 15 points...Incidently, Brearley, Goldie, and Chambers have accounted for 24 of the Warriors’4Eigoalsthissaason...Joe Harris is third in the OUAA with a 2.55 goals against average.

Warriors 9 RMC 3 First Period &:No Scoring Second Period 1. Warriors, Cardiff (Smith, Vaughan) -357. 2. Warriors, Oliver (Kraemer, Chambers) 456. 3. Warriors, Esdale (Fullerton, Carcliff) 6:41, 4. Warriors, Goldie (Smith, Vaughan) 8:02. 5. Warriors, Pfohl (Devereaux, Paleczny) 1194. Third Period 6. RMC, Bransard (Chenette) (pp) 4: 16. 7. RMC, Hat-wood (Valiquette, Paul) 4:36. 8. Warriors, Esdale 2 (Palmer, Oliver) (pp) 6:29. 9. Warriors, Palmer (Kraemer) (pp) 7:2X 10. RMC, Chenettc (Bransard, Boyd) (pp) 8:47. 1 I. Warriors, Chambers (Kraemer, Esdale) 15: 10. 12. Warriors, Palecny (Kraemer, -2 Chambers) 18: 16. Saves: by Harris, Warriors- I B/2 1; by Clancy, Heilman, RMC-23/32. Penalty Minutes- Warriors- 12, RhK- 12.

Skaters off to gliding start k by Jennifer Harrison special to Imprint

he Athena Figure Skating team got off to a fantastic start this season with an exciting third-place finish. at the Queen’s Invitational competition in Kingston last Friday, Nov 15. Waterloo and Guelph were in a tie for second place with 44 pohts until the fmd event when the G-yphons edged out in front by a mere two points. Queen’s University continued its winning streak from last year by once again ftishing a strong first with 76 points. The Athenas had a brilliant start early in the

day, leading the competition for the first six events. However, the Golden Gaels got ahead by winning three of the final five events. Dazzling performances by veterans Helen Atkinson and Laura Vandqrhayden along with Nancy Ford and Lisa Guch earned each dance duo a first place finish in their events. Ford followed that performance with a great solo dance performante which earned her a second place finish. Atkinson also added to the team’s final point count by finishing fifth in her solo dance event: Veteran Sharlene Slater skated a wonderful short program

to capture the silver medal in that category. Gina; Cervini and Courtney Gill (similar pairs) and last year’s MVP Jill Thomson (Open singles) aIsodelivered solid programs to secure a very respectable third place finish in their events. Slater also paired up with Guch for the Senior similar pairs event and ended up sixth while Cervti ended up seventh in her singles event. Rookies Elizabeth Bauer and Ailan Mackenzie got their first taste of Univ43sity skating and ftihed f&h and seventh respectively in their free skate events. The Athenas are looking for-

ward to hosting OWIAA finals in February. The strong third place finish in Kingston has given the t&m the confidence it needs in preparing for this competition. When asked to r&ect on the day of competition, coach Dear+ Philipswasveryenthusiastic:The team got off to a much stronger start than last year. It’s great to see the team perform so welt so early in the season.n Philipsandthe 15 teammemhers, along with the team’s other coach Carolyn Allright, are now ready to work together towards one common goal: winning the OWLAA championships at home on February 22 and 23.

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thena and Warrior swimmers toured the vicinity A ast weekend taking on their favourite rivals WEU, GueIph and Brock. Friday night, the action was at the Gryphon pool. Super sprinters John Milne and Anthony Tham took the onetwo finish in the men’s 50 meter freestyle and took the 2OOm IM and 20Om backstroke respectively. Andrew Moffat swam to a frost place (2OOm breast) and Jay Cull placed second in the 400m. The 4xlOOm free relay, made up of Nagy, Milne, Tham and Washbrook also snatched the gold. The women’s team was able to conquer Laurier, but the Guelph women were slightly out of reach. Highlights included second place finishes by Amy Jarvis (8OOmfree, 200m fly), Sheryl Sanders (200m back) and Tereza Mace1 (200m free). Val Walker sprinted her way to number one in the 1OOm free and should also be congratulated for shattering

the 20Om breaststroke team record (2; 46.49) with her second place performance of 2:46.00! Like the men, Waterloo women Jarvis, Hlywka, Mace1 and Walker smoked the competitors in the 4xlOOm free relay. It was back on the bus Saturday afternoon for the trip to Badgertown. Overall, the Warriors beat their competition (146 73) while the Athenas accepted a close defeat (118-120). The men (Nagy, Minic, Moffat, Secord) and women (Brerreton, Jarvis, Macel, P&s) started the meet winning the 4x5Om free relay. Mace1 and Hlywka did the distance (400m free) finishing first and second, as did Walker and Pells in the 1OOm fly* Adding to the score included first place performances by Sanders (5Om back), Pells (5Om fly), Walker (400m IM) and Jarvis (2OOm IM, 200m free). Campbell, Mace1 and Hlywka racked up some silver in the 5Om breast, free and 1OOm back respectively. Sanders, Walker, Hlywka and Jarvis ended the meet

with a first place finish in the 4xlOOm medley relay. Demolishing the competition, first place fishes for the men included Tham (1OOm fly, 1OOm free, 8 rounds of Euchre), Nagy (50m back, 5Om fly), Milne (100m breast, 200m IM), Washbrook@Omfree),Shanbhag (50m breast) and Moffat (400m l&I). Warriors Rohmann and Ryansfilled placed second and third in the 4OOm free. Rookies Dan McKerral (50m fly), Cameron Charles (1OOm free), Maneesh Shanbhag (100m fly), Nenad Minic (50m free), Jon Secord (1OOm breast) &d Bill Leonard (50m breast) all brought back some bronze. The powerhouse 4xlOOm Medley Relay of Nagy, Milne, Tham and Washbrook divided the waters with the fmal win of the meet. The swimmers will not be found on the deck this weekend, but will use this time to strategize for next weekend’s U of T Invitational on Friday and prepare to host the Sherbrooke Dual Meet on Saturday;

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point in a 3-O win Thursday. photo

by Jeff Peeters he Warrior volleyball team has opened up the season with an impressive 2-1 mark tier a 3-O sweep of the Gryphons last Wednesday night. “Unlike last year, every match is big for us,” said coach Tony Martins. The team is going through a rebuilding phase, and no win is going to be easy for the Warriors. Regardless, the team

OUAA West doormats GuelDh and Brock. In those games rnky of the sets which the Warriors won were very close. One of the team’s problems has been inconsistencies on the defensive side. “Up until now we’ve given up points in bunches. We have to be a consistently intense defensive team. We saw an improvement against Guelph. We played better defensively. ” The team has lost many of its veteran players from last year. This

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son, but coachMartins isn’t breaking out the bubbly just yet. ‘We’ve played ali right so far. [But] we haven’t’ really beaten anybodyspectacularyet. Wedidn’t dominate anybody.” Waterloo’s wins have come against traditional

forced

new

captain

Jason

Hubbard to take on-more of the offensive md leadership roles that were vacated by the veterans’ depUhlKS. “[Hubbard’s been] the most consistent player. This year a lot of the pressure’s on his shoulders

and he’s responded very well,” said Martins about the team’s top player this season. Adding to the team’s success has been zFpleasantly surprising performance from the setter position, a key to any team’s success. “Brian Snooks, the setter, has been one of the biggest surprises. [He’s being pushed by] this new guy, Mark Gatto. The specuIa&on was that this guy would take over. At this point anyway he’s [Snooks] managed to retain his starting role. It’s still very close. Mark could easily be starting.” On

Wednesday,

the

team

travelled to Western, their toughest opponent yet in this young season. Results were unavailable at press time. The Warriors’ next home game is this _ - Wednesday against the surprising cross-town

IMPRINT,

Friday, November

21’

SPORTS

22, 1996

Warriors and CR all-stars battle for IJVVvolleyball supremacy

Iast Thursday, a Campus Ret team composed of the league champion Renision Rebels and league all-stars took on the Warrior volleybaIl team h an exhibition tit at the PAC.Although the WaMors prevailed in three straight’ sets, the Campus Ret team gave them a spirited match. left: a Campus Ret a& star tries to hit around a black and god wall of stuff block. ribove: Warrior coach Tony Martins (right) smiles in anticipation of the ass-whoophg that his team is going to lay on Campus Ret coach Joe Cascagmette’s(lefi) squad. photos

CampUs Ret playoff results Villeybull

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A Division

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Varsitv roundup The Athena and Warrior badminton squad captured the West Sectional II tournament in London on the weekend with a perfect 4-O record. Waterloo beat Guelph, Western, Mtiaster and Brock in head-to-head meetings (called “ties”), and compiled a dominating 37-7 record in individual matches. The defeat of Western by a 7-4 score atoned for a 6-5 loss to the Mustangs at the first Sectional tournament hosted at Waterloo. Waterloo’s top male player, Dan Frank, returned to action this

weekend

and led the Warri-

ors to four victories in five matches with Western, Other individual highlights at the tournament included Jeff Sum and Craig Smith going undefeated in both doubles and singles play. Sum and Craig did not lose a match asWaterloo’s number one men’s doubles team,

while Sum won three singles matches and Craig took one. As well, rookie Ryan Gunther was undefeated in all four of his doubles matches in the number two spot. The Athenas split a pair of games this weekend at the OWIAA West Sneak Preview tournament played at Brock in St. Catharines. On Friday night, Waterloo faced the host Badgers. Mer leading by five points at halftime, the Athenas saw the lead slip away in the second half and eventually lost 49-45. Jacalyn White led on the scoresheet with 14 points and 11 rebounds. On Saturday, Waterloo turned things around against the Cuelph Gryphons. Trailing by five points at the half this time, the Athenas bounced back to win

Jodi Hawley led Waterloo scorers with 18 points, while Jacalyn White contributed 14. Rookie Janis Goldie grabbed 14 rebounds and another rookie Kristi Tomasin went 3-for-3 from behind the three-point line. 57-54.

Waterloo flew to Winnipeg on the weekend for a ftiti meeting with two teams from the GPAC (Great Plains Athletic Conference) in the GPAC-Ontario Challenge. On Friday, Waterloo downed the University of Manitoba, 6059. Mano Watsa scored 16 points in the win, while Mike Crosby and Derek Matt each added 12. The next night against the U of Winnipeg, the Warriors had an easier time and prevailed 72-60. Watsa was once again the leading scorer with 15, while Derek Matt added 14 and Mike Zavershnik

11. Watsa was named tournament MVP and Crosby named to the all-star team. The Western Mustangs also met bothManitoba and Winnipeg at the event and came away with two wins.

vum’ty CwlinpJ The Athenas took top honours but the Warriors placed second to a dominating Western rink at the Waterloo Invitational bonspiel held at the Westmount Curling Club on the weekend. The Athenas showed they do not intend to give up their OWIAA crown easilv with earlv wins over Laurier ani Toronto’and a nailbiter victory over Western. Against die Mustangs, skip Susan Fraud made a nice hit-and-stick on her fti1a.lstone to win the game by one point. The remaining Athenas, Jami. Burkell, Tara McAninch, Erin Shaw and Valerie Sloan, ail made outstanding con-

tributions. On the Warrior side, the all-new Waterloo team beat Laurier and Toronto but fell to Western. The Warriors are also defending Ontariochampionsand show&d they have the skill to contend for the title once again, despite having no returnees from last season. Team members this year are Tony Rowlandson, Pat Greenman, Gord Gilpin and Graham Slater. The Warriors improved to 21 on the season with a 3-O victor-v over the visiting Guelph Grypht ons last Wednesday. Set s&es were 15-13, 15-4 and 15-12. Warrior co-captain Jason Hubbard led on the stat sheet with 19 kills, 18 digs, two stuff blocks and one ace. Power hitter Jeff Lingard contributed 16 kills and four blocks while Ivan Luke had five kills and five blocks.

Athletes of the vveeK Nimcy Fwd Fa&pre Skating at Charles) Kitchener

A fti-year skater from Arkona, Ford placed first in Senior Similar Dance with partner Lisa Guch and was second in Open Solo Dance at the Queen’s Invitational competition on Friday. Ford’s performances led the team to a strong bronze-medal finish,

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Milne won four separate individual events and contributed to two relay victories as the Waterloo swimming teams faced Guelph, Laurier and Brock on Friday and Saturday. A second-year Kinesiology student, Milne was a-co-winner of the Warrior Rookie of the Year last season.

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MIDEAST

GPW

Guelph

A TP

1 4 5 6

0 0 0 0

52 63 44 22

20 41 45 35

Toronto Queen’s RMC

9 1 0 9 5 3 1 10 3 7 0 10 1 9 0

43 43 24 23

18 34 67 61

MIDWEST

GPWL

A TP

Laurentian York Brock Ryerson

8 8

6 2 0 42 27 12 3 4 1 32 25 7

260

8 6 5 3

10 6 TP

18 I1

6 2

2031

10 2 8 0

27 48

FARWEST

GPWLT

Waterloo Laurier Western Windsor

9 9

8 1 0 45 21 16 3 4 2 28 26 8

2 4 2

A TP

25 32 6

Results Nov. 14 Guelph 15 Laurier Ottawa UQTR Toronto Concordia 16 McGill Laurentian Waterloo Laurier Concordia Toronto Guelph UQTR 17 Laurentian Waterloo

Upcoming

2 3 2 2 5 1 3 OT 0 I 3 2 3 2 2 4 3

Games

Nov. 21 Guelph Toronto 22 Ryerson Queen’ s York Laurentian 23 York Laurentian Ryerson Brock Guelph Queen’s RMC

3 Western 7 Queen’s 3 York 6 Brock 6 Windsor 5 Ryerson 4 York 6 Ottawa 6 Queen’s 4RMc 5 Brock 7 Western 3 Windsor 9 Ryerson 8 McGill 9 RMC

24 Toronto Brock RMC

at Waterloo at Laurier at McGill at Western at Concordia at UQTR at UQTR at Concordia at Ottawa at McGill at Laurier at Windsor at Western at Waterloo at Ottawa at Windsor

7:30pm 7:3Opm 7:OOpm 7:30pm 7:30pm 8:OOpm 1:3Opm

3:OOpm 3:30pm 7:OOpm 7:OOpm 7: 30pm 7:30pm 2:QOpm 3:3Opm 3:3Qpm

WEST CIAU HOCKEY

1. 2. 3. 4. 5. 6. 7. 8. 9. 10. 10. 10. m-me

*TEAM

McGill I McGill McGill Lauren. Windsor McGill Waterloo Waterloo Lauren. UQTR Waterloo Toronto UQTR McGill Windsor UQTR Concordia

G +A

10 10 10 8 a a 9 9

13 9 12 11 6 6 9 8

20 15 7 7 11 11 7 8

33 24 19 18 17 17 16 16

9 9 9‘6 9 10 8 8 10

8 7 15’ 7 8 15 3 8 7 5 5

.TEAM

Matt Mullin S. Rodrigue Joe Harris J. Dimaline G. Schnare

Guelph UQTR Waterloo York Laurier

MIN

Queen’s Toronto York Waterloo Ottawa Guelph Western McMaster

SECT1

12 7 7 9 9

15 15 14 14 14

GA AVG

4 36O:OO 8 1.33 8 430115 18 2.51 8 400:40 17 2.55 7 420:oO 19 2.71 9 499:47 23 2.76

CROSS I SECT II

5-o

4-O

13-o

3-l

5-O

3-l

H-2

2-2 3-l l-3 2-2 4-O 1-3

5-o l-4 5-O l-4 l-4 l-4

2-2 4-O l-4 3-l 2-2 1-3

9-4 8-5 7-6 7-6 7-6

Ryerson

0-4

l-4

O-4

Brock

O-4

O-5

o-4

3-10

1-12 O-13

VQI;LEYBAII;L

OUAA MP MW

Toronto

Queen’s

4’2 4 3 4

Ryerson York Laurentian

15 2

2 1 0

2 2 2 4

6 6 6 3

4 4 2 0

7 9 6 12

4 2

8 8 4

422674

1 12 0 1 12 0

Upcoming

Games

Nov. 20 Guelph at Brock McMaster at Windsor Waterloo at Western

8:OOpm. 8:00 pm 8:OO pm

VOLLEYBALL

Upcoming

TEAM

Toronto York Ottawa Queen’ s Carleton Ryerson Lakehead

6 3 4 3’ 3 3 6

Toronto Western Queen’s McGill McMaster Waterloo Ryerson

WEST

MP MW ML GW GL TP -5’5 6 5 6 3 3 2 3 ,2 5 1 - 4 0 4

0 1 3 1 1

18 9 9 6 2 0 4

1 1 6 4 9 9 18

15 3

12 6 6 4 0 0 0

16 10 6 % 4 1

3 10 10 6 3 4 3 4 12 2 12 0

Games

Nov. 20 Waterloo at McMaster at Guelph at 22 York at Western at 23 Western _ at Ryerson at York at 24 Ryerson at York at

MP MW ML GW GL TP 0 0 1 1 3 3 6

Nov. 13 Waterloo 3 Guelph (15~5,16-14, 15-12) Windsor 3 Laurier (15-10, 15-7, O-7) Western 3 Brock (15-10, 15-6, 15-12) 15 McMaster 3 Laurier (15-2, 15-6, 15-5) Western 3 Guelph (14-16, 15-10, 15-10, 15-9) Windsor 3 Nipissing (15-3, 15-8, 15-10) 16 Windsor 3 Nipissing (15-7, 15-5, 15-9) Waterloo 3 Brock (15-7, 15-6, 15-12)

EAST

6 3 3 2 0 0 0

(cont.)

Results

OWIAA

Western Windsor Guelph Waterloo McMaster Laurier Nipissing Brock

4-O

EAST

1 14 5 1 13 5 1 7 4 1634

3 Brock 0 (15-7, 15-13, 15-11) Waterloo 3 Guelph 04 (IS-13, 15-4, 15-12) Laurier 3 Windsor 0 (15-6, 15-12, 15-11) 14 Toronto 3 York 2 (15-9, s-15, 9-15, 17-15, 15-8) 15 McMaster 3 Laurier 1 (10-15, 15-12, 15-13, 15-13) Toronto 3 Queen’s 0 (15-4, 15-13, 15-N) Western 3 Guelph 1 (15-6, 15-4, 14-16, 15-7) *

BADMINTON TEAM

5 5 3 32

Results Nov. 13 Western

LEADING GOALTENDERS PLAYER

MP MW ML GW GL TP

Western . Laurier McMaster Waterloo Windsor Brock Guelph

SCORING LEADERS

Pierre Gendron Kelly Nobes S. Angers Kiley Hill Dan Ceman Benoit Leroux Peter Brearley Jeff Goldie Kevin MacKay Patrick Genest M. Chambers Kent Williams Luc Bilodeau Dave Gourde Brandon Boyko Marc Beaucage D. Savard

TOP TEN

Calgary Dinosaurs UQTR PATRIOTES Acadia Axemen GUELPH GRYPHONS WATERLOO WARRIORS Alberta Golden Bears LAURENTIAN VOYAGEURS UNB Varsity Reds St. Francis Xavier X-Men MCGILL REDMEN Saskatchewan Huskies Lethbridge Pronghoms -4=wim#

INDIVIDUAL

(cont.)

VOLLEYBALL

Western Windsor Brock Queen’s Nipissing Nipissing Carleton Ottawa Ottawa Carleton

SQUASH SECTI

SECT11

17 12 13 4 5 1 0

16 11 12 6 4 3 2

I TP 33 23 25 , 12 9 4 2

CURLING Nov. 23 Western Invitational

iii:30 am .

BASKPPBALL

OWIAA Nov.20 Waterloo at Guelph 23 Laurier at Windsor

7:30 pm 2:oO pm

SPORTS

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IMPRINT,

Friday, November

22, 1996

The Canadian Interuniversity Athletics Union has conducted drug tests all year on football teams, looking for players guilty of using steroids. Inexplicably, they didn’t test at all tier the Churchill and Atlantic Bowls this past weekend. The reasons given by the CIAU indicate that their policy on dealing with players caught with steroids is seriously flawed and needs to be changed. Many have speculated that the CIAU didn’t test anybody because they didn’t want the embarassing repurcussions on the Vanier Cup on November 30. See, CIAU policy says that if a player is caught using steroids, they receive a four-year suspension, their name is made public, and, the clincher, the team must forfeit any games where a player is caught using steroids. Hello. So, say that a third string Saskatchewan player was nailed %r steroid use. That means Guelph, not Saskatchewan, would be awarded the Churchill Bowl and would advance to the Vanier Cup. How embarrasing that would be for the CIAU. Clearly this would be wise

reasoning for not testing players. The problem is, now they set a dangerous precedent. If they continue on this path, what’s to stop players from using steroids in the week leading up to the Churchill and Atlantic Bowis? Nothing. They know that they won’t be checked, so inject away boys. This puts the CIAU in a tight spot. Test, akd risksending a losing team to the Vanier Cup. Don’t test, and risk having a bunch of juiced-up players cheat their way to a Vtier Cup berth. Perhaps if their policy wasn’t so flawed, the CIAU wouldn’t fmd themselves in this predicament. So what do thev do? ’ Simple. Having a tear-n forfeit a game because of the mostly uncontrollable actions of one player is just plain dumb. Sure, penalize the player. If they’re stupid enough to cheat and get caught, &t’s their problem. D&t m&e it a problem for the rest of the guys on the team who played by the rules and were powerless to stop one rogue player from trying tq get an unfair advantage. Although this concept somewhat applies in the rules of football, 5-

15 yards is a lot less harsh than a whole game. Eliminating the automatic forfeiture from the rules would avoid embarassing situations like the one that has arisen this week. The CIAU could test away and punish any one player who is caught without fear of sending a loser to the Vanier. Sure, not having the player may hurt the team, but that’s as far as the liability of the team should go. The CIAU has dug themselves a deep hole with their current policy. Making this change could help them find their way out and become a credible organization again.

Judging fro& the recent applications for NHL franchises, and the recent buzz about franchise relocations, one thing has become painfully apparent: _the North American sports market is tapped. With each league sitting around 30 teams, and all of them looking for more, the problem arises that there’s nothing left. It’s only a matter of time before all of the decent markets either have a team, or had a team until it moved. As it stands, we’re dangerously close to that point now. So, the major sports have begun to look outside of the United States and Canada. Witness the recent basebail, football contests in Mexico. Witness the World League of American Football. Witness the recent basketball showdown in Japan, with almost 40,000 fans in attendance each night. So does the hture of professiond sports expansion lie outside North America? Should it be pursued? Will it work? ‘Yes, no and no. The titure does lie outside of North America, that’s a given. The North American market can’t support anymore teams. Existing franchises are struggling in markets like Hardbrd, Houston and Pittsburgh, all of which are capable of supporting pro sports franchises. That leaves two

possiblilities: stabilize the existing franchises, or add more and hope for the best. This has been the tactic thus far with the proleagues. That and whining about how little money they have and how they can’t afford to give Albert Belle $55 million, but do. But I digress. Should international expansion be pursued? Not a:chance in he& and I justify this with one reason: rhe current hierarchy of pro-sports leagues wouldn’t know how to handle it. Overhead costs are high enough as it, so North American teams would be adverse to consistantly flying overseas to play games. The only setup that would work would be to copy the style used by World Cup Soccer, with zones and teams divided as such. It’s a long shot to work, and I wouldn’t trust current sports management to make it effective. And international expansion would not work to improve the game. With so many fertile foreign markets, it’s all too likely that the leagues would go wild, and try to establish more teams than the league, or most importantly, the talent pool, can handle. There are enough players in pro-sports who don’t really deserve to be in the big leagues, but it’s already too late to fix that problem. The second major problem . thatwilloccursoundsalittlesome-

thing like this. Pretend you’re a major league basebail player with a fdy, born and raised in the United States. You have a couple of great seasons with, say, the Cleveland Indians. In the off-season, the Berlin Hasslehoffs offer you a contract. Do you uproot your lXe to move to Germany when you can get the same deal in the States? Would anyone? It’s not quite the same as deciding between whether to -play in Chicago and -Florida. In the past, players went to Europe or Japan when they just couldn’t get a job in North America. As a result, the new’ foreign teams will have to lavish ridiculously large salaries on players (and you thought they were ridiculous now!) to entice them to move out of North America. Considering that many foreign countries don’t have player development systems even close to those in place inN&th America, I’m picturing a bunch of semitalent hacks and a couple ofArnerican has&ens. The salary structure willcontinue tocrumble, costs witl get wildly out of hand, the foreign teams will be unable to compete and the experiment will be a dismal failure. An ill-conceived, poorly executed plan courtesy of our friends in professional sports! Nah, it could never happen. Again.

Last week I handed out awards for stupidity. Here’s another one. The H~octits Awurd This award goes to Chicago White Sox owner Jerry Reinsdorf. Reinsdorfwas one of the leaders of the Strike Out The Deal campaign ofthe baseball owners, hoping to drive down player sdaries. This week, he signed free agent Albert Belle to a five-year, $55 million dollar deal. Go figurk.

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-Extend the sphere of one’s simsations The Torture King Bumbsbehw Thursday, November 14 by James Russell Imprint staff

bout 100 people sat in the Bomber, some filled with repidation, waiting for theTorture King to take the stage. Other than that he was a member of the infamous Jim Rose Circus Sideshow, all we knew of the Torture King was that he was going to hurt himselffor our pleasure. Cool. Scott, the Torture King’s presenter, came out and invited the crowd to get up close, real close, Ywithin glass-spraying distance” close, so we could be absolutely sure that what&we were about to see was not fake. Eagerly, we pressed forward, our lust for blood whetted, but unsated. Starting with something simple, the King swallowed some fire and rolled the torch on his tongue and lit another torch from that flat& More impressive was taking a mourn of kerosene and blowing a fireball that warmed me1 .5 feet away. He also stood on eggs and swallowed some swords.

Nice, but nothing I haven’t seen before. The Torture King stripped off his boots and jumped up and down on broken glass before using his chest as a cutting board and slicing up some onions and sausage. Only bleeding a little, he pulled red-hot iron bars out of his furnace and stamped on them and bashed them with his hand. Fortunately, the half-healed burn an his hand didn’t open up again on stage. This was getting better. AstheTortureKinglaydown on the broken glass, Scott pulled a volunteer from the crowd. 0h God, he’s not going to do what I think he’s going to do, is he? Oh, yeah. The girl, iooking more than a little freaked out, first stood on the King’s chest, and then, with the crowd’s enthusiastic and perverted approval, jumped up and down on him. Just to give his back a good workout, the King then lay down across four swords, after chopping a cucumber on them to demonstrate their edges. Scott balanced a cinder block on the Ring’s chest and then smashed it with a sledgehammer. A briefintermission followed, giving the King time to clean

the glass and insert about 30 needles into the skin on his chest and upper arms. As Scott warned the crowd about ftiting, we knew it was going to get good. The Torture King lit a light bulb to prove it was real before eating it, and followed it up by swallowing about lofeetoftwine. Why twine? Not so he could regurgitate it, no, no, that would be too easy. The King cut into his stomach (just a small hole) with a scalpel, reachedinside himselfwith some forceps and pulled out one end ofthe twine. Scott helped out by taking the forceps and backing away as the Torture King hung some Christmas baubles an the line before it was entirely extracted from his body. That was good, but it just got better. It was time for the generator. Sticking a florescent ceiling light in his mouth, the Torture King touched a metal rod to the spark-lit coil and the tube in his mouth lit up, Then, as ifthere was any doubt asto how powerful this generator was, the King ignited one of his torches with a spark from his tmJtie! Christ! Saving the best for last, the Torture King’proceeded to stick a needle through his cheeks, ex-

~etztx.~ww!That'sgotta hurt.

photo

by Rob Van

Ktuistum

plaining the curious dimples he the bottom of his lower jaw. I’m has. He also put one through the not a particularly queasy guy, but muscle in his right forearm and * that was pretty freaky. right through his left bicep. I had AshowI’mnotgoingtosoon no idea how far human skin could forget. If you get off on seeing stretch until I saw those needles some guy do things that would be trying to poke out of the other excruciatingly painful to anyone side of the King’s appendages. else, great. Go see him. You’ll Themostunnervingstuntwas have i good time. But even if the needle in the mouth. Yes, the that’s not your thing, it is still an mouth. Avoiding the tongue, the incredible display of what the Torture Ring pierced the bottom human body and mind can do. of his mouth and just kept going check olct the king at until the needle protruded fiorn www. intmm.cum/mre

napplnessis a loadedgun TT

Soundgarden

he last time I saw Soundgarden was August 1994 with Nine Inch Nails at Molson Park in Barrie. They sucked!- They played as if they couldn’t get off the stage fast enough, each song carrying into the next. Rarely did they stop to talk to or even acknowledge the audience. Would Varsity Arena be any different, or is Soundgarden

robe would-all seven members were dressed in ultra-shiny metallic shirts. Adding to their show was a horns section, trumpet and sax, and a crazy, skinny back-up singer who danced as if possessed by a 1970’s Mick Jagger. They were a great opening act. I have always been a fan of Soundgarden and had high expectations. Fortunately, they came through and played a kick-ass show! “Spoonman” started it, followed by ccSea.rching With My Good Eye Closed” and Tet Me Drown.” The sound in the rather small arena was surprisingly good and the crowd was right into it. Chris

“Ty Cobb,” which was dedicated to this year’s AL Cy Young award winner, the Blue Jays’ Pat Hentgen. Before “My Wave,” Soundgarden’s “just fuck of!?’ song, Cornell told us that it wasn’t meant as a %ck off’ to us but that ifwe wanted to tell off the band, now was the tine to do it. And so the audience did. Mid-set and just b&ore “Blow Up The OutGde World,” they played Gntinually flashing across the screen were the words “mother,” “father,” “me,” Schappiness,” cclove,” cccountry” and Lcenemy”with various pictures following* titially

justashdiobandwithshittystage

stopped

“me”

presence? Rocket From The Crypt opened. They are a rather loud and heavy rock and roll band with lots of energy on the stage. If their music didn’t command your attention, their ward-

and &lled a storv that involved him crossing border into Canadaandh&ingtoexplainwhy he had large pieces of furniture shoved up his ass. The singles Eram Dt7wn @B The Upside were played next, then

w/Rocket f%om the Crypt Vanity Amzu Wednesday, November 13

by Derek Dupuis special to Imprint

to talk Gith

the audience

was

a young

boy,

but

cEme”grew older, the pigot confused. InsteadofHitl& picture following ccenemyT his picture followed the word Rather.” ccMe” was finally followed by an adolescent in jail and the word “happi-

30 Kim, %urden in my Hand’ goes A sharp, C, E flat, rightY “yes, Chris. It always has.* =I3iw.* Dhoto bv Derek Dewis ness” was followed by a loaded gun then a mushroom cloud. Weird, twisted shit. Chris continued to work the crowd, especially, with “Rusty

“NeverTheMachineForever”and UJesus Christ Pose.” I fbund it interesting that throughout the show, several&s for YCP” were heardandyet&ePNTMF,“both

Cage.”

Chris

Lighters

came

out

when

he played the %lack Hole Sun” solo. Then they stirred the crowd into a frenzy with a most incredible version of “Outshined,” endingwith Ben smashing his bass all over the speakers. They returned to encore with

Cornell

and Ben

Sheppard

stood with their arms outstretched, foreshadowing the song-but the crowd didn’t pick up on it until they played it. OveralJan6utstandingshow, well worth the mid-week trip to Toronto.

ARTS

iiTERRIFIC! Oneof the year’sbestmovies,”

IMPRINT,

Finni an’s TongUe

d W/

Pond B o , Dissemblers, and d ynchopath Mm -&d&&a’s Thursday, November 14 by Patrick Imprint

- Janet Mash, THE NEWYORK TIMES

Mood-altering drugs, Virtual Reality, Digital & Biotechnology & Plastic Surgery. , ,

waving one’s hands in the air. The sound was truly exotic, contrasting the earthy percussive sounds with the other-worldly theramin. Their cover of”Big and Friendly Waiter Joe” would make Stompin’ Tom turn over in his grave (were he actually dead). All in all, a highly positive testimonial for the use of mind-altering

drugs. After Synchopath, no band could pbssibly seem as interesting. The Dissemblers tried, but despite everything good I’d heard about this Guelph band, nothing was extremely interesting save for their re-creation of the acapella sing-along “Bud the Spud.” A good, solid bar-band soundnonetheless. Pond Dog used to be Ma’s Home Remedy, a Wilfrid Laurier band with an impressive history, and the band with another name would sound as sweet, save for the lack of “Billy Bishop.” They did an excellent version of the Stompin’ Tom classic‘The Bridge Came Tumblin’ Down,” and an even better cover of an early folk song about the Black Donelly Massacres. They weren’t Stompin’ Tom’s lyrics, but the spirit was the same-a slice of Canadiana put to

West Side Story Centw in the Spure

Experience livingandworkingin anothercountry.

through:

K-W will be treated to one of the only new, original interpretations November 21-24 of this classic play: directed and choreographed by ‘The professional rights to Timothy French West Si& Stmy are quite locked up, so any professional theatre espite the hype over the - that wants to do Wext Side Stay is new Hollywood producbound to recreate the Jerome tion ofRowzeoand Juliet, Robbins’ choreography direcWest Side Stay remains the first tion,” explains French. attempt to update Shakespeare’s “Mirvish or Stradord can’t bring classic play. Ironically, IKeg Side in a new modern director or a new Stq has itself become dated due modern choreographer and do an to the inabi.Lty of directors and up to date or original version of choreographers toupdatethe story the show. We’re a community of Puerto-Rican/American tentheatre, so we have a once-in-asion. Metime opportunity to do this Until now, that is. ’ show our own way.” As director and choreograTimothy French has a solid pher Timothy French explains, background in the drama busi-

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music. The Stomp on Wood party would have been better observed backwards; no one after Synchopath could hold my interest, and the placement of a country-rock band as headliners was quite questionable. Finnigan’s Tongue were rock, but they were also country, and I was in no mood for country. As openers they would have been perf:ct; but the night had been long, and, despite the rumours, the mighty Tom Connors had filed to appear. Rend the Stomp on Wood albwiv wvkw m pipjc 31 of his zssue.

Westside connection

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Ownedandopemtedby he ConadianFeederohof Students

Wilkins staff

tmp on Wmd: A Tribute to Stmpin’ Tom was ccmceived and crafted by Wa-, terloo’s Brent Hagerman, bears the mark of local label Swallow Records, and was adopted by DRUG when Swallow disappeared along with Shannon Lyon’s in& status. The compilation is a rare example of co-operation between the music worlds of Guelph and Kitchener-Waterloo, and the album’s official release was in the same spirit. Synchopath was the frostband on. With three hand-drummers (two of whom would occasionally switch to the more standard &itar and bass) and a wild-eyed scraggly-haired vocalist who looked like he’d just spent the last 40 days in the desert, Synchopath would have been strange enough. Synchopath also, however, features a theramin, a weird 1920s electronic instrument played by

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ness, working on plays across Canada including’T;bC’K~tiMan, Me and My Girl, T;be Gvnhlim and 7%~ Ha. S. Pinu~e. Under his direction, the audience will see a professional director with a previously-unrealized opportunity to interpret a classic play. French seesthe local artists as a major benefit to the play,. stating, “1 think what people are going to see is the amazing raw energy of all-local talenwho are in fact the age of these characters. You’re not watching 35year-old professionals play a 17-year-old gang member.” Wed Skii Story plkys at the ce?zm iH tbi? sdp&+#n N-o~4~21-24. l

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oul Brother #-1, the original sex machine, the hardest working man in show business, the Godfather of funk and soul, yes, that’s right, the one and only James Brown is back with a brand new bag full of 30 years of hits, coming directly to Lulu’s this Saturday night. Lulu’s, you say, what the hell is international star James Brown doing giving it up or turning it loose at the sight of the longest bar inCanada?My

answer

is, d&k

ask questions-just go. Tickets are $25 in advance and $30 at the door and can be

bought at Forwell’s Food MartoratSamtheRecord Man in Connestoga Mall. Doors open at 7:30 p.m., with entertainment beginningat&OOp.m.Inother words, with the purchase of a $25 ticket you’re guaranteed at least five hours of music. So if you have any plans this Saturday night, cancel them and check out one of the best musical entertainers and innovators this world has ever James Bmwn seen.

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IMPRINT,

Friday,

22, 1996

November

ARTS .

Beat meat before it beats you Meat Beat Manifesto

Freaky Chakra vs. Single Cell Orchestra and spun right up until MBM were ready to take the stage. One good thing about this show was that there wasn’t the usual halfan hour ofboredom between bands. The music Opewa Hme never stopped. When Paterson hit the stage 9 Saturday, November 16 the dance floor filled up. It was obvious there were quite a few people there who by Andrew Ishermod knew who he was and were expecting more special to Imprint than just your average D J set. He started out spinning some techno t was with great anticipation and then moved into a jungle set. Jungle is that I went to see Meat Beat all the rage right now and it seems like AManifesto this Saturday night. Their everyone likes it except me. Paterson was new album, Sddimind Sandwid, is one of obviously aware he was not playing to his the most unique releases of 1996, featuring usual rave crowd and at one point he threw a blend of industrial, techno and hip hop. I in a Cure sample which got a good reaction was also very much looking forward to from the more gothic/industrial people in seeing Alex Paterson, the brainchild of the the crowd. Qrb. Meat Beat Manifesto are a band that Opening act Freaky Chakra vs. Single have been around since the late 80’s and Cell Orchestra had just taken the stage have been through many changes, with when I showed up. Their sound was not Jack Dangers being the only remaining very loud and thei did little to capture the member. MBM’s older shows were famed attention of the crowd. The first few songs for being large multimedia presentations sounded like a mellower, more ambient Pwith video costumes and choreographed Chemical Brothers, but as the set prodancers. There was none of this extravagressed their sound became more harsh gance at this show, only a video projected and industrial. Overall they had a few good behind the stage. The videos all seemed to ideas but they ended up sounding uncoorportray a modern decay of civilization, dinated and uninteresting. featuring a melange of violentie, pornograAlex Paterson immediately followed phy and atomic bomb footage.

w/ DJ. Alex Patterson and Chakra vs. Fre Single55 ell Orchestra

Non-objective art RonMartin:

The Black-White-Grey Paint;lgs, 1987-88 KitcbMWuterloo Art Gallery Until Sunday, December I by Dan Zachariab special to Imprint

s a prime mover behind the modernist movement, abstract art has rought existentialism and the notion of the painter’s identity to the forefront of contemporary artistic theory. The Abstract Expressionists were the touchstone of the post-war abstract art movement, and their work has spawned numerous imitators. Many of these artists eventually broke new ground after using Abstract Expressionism as their point of departure, Canadian artist Ron Martin has been a staunch advocate of non-objective art, and he continued to paint in this vein even after the movement had seemingly died out in the 1980’s. His show at the K-W Art Gallery explores the relationship between these two poles, to see ifthey can co-exist. All of the paintings are done in black, white, and grey acrylic as the exhibition’s title suggests. In viewing Martin’s works, one is struck by the tactile quality of the paint, which acts as a unifying agent for the program as a whole. Y%.inting functions as a concrete, reflective surface to make people more aware of the medium as an issue and something that has significance and unconscious meaning” said Martin. .Although Martin’s craftmanship in these works is admirable, he comes off as appearing a little too calculated and derivative to be en,lirely convincing. This conSpicuous lack of originality resurfaces in paintings like LcSpontaneous Order” (1987) which juxtaposes discrete geometric forms with a painterly depiction

of what appears to be a human figure actively posing, This figure hG a sense of immediacy to it, but we have already seen this motif from de Kooning’s human landscape compositions of the late 1960’s. On the other end of the spectrum are works like “Paint Reduction” (198647) andc‘NoNotThis,NorThat#15”(1987) where the abundance of overlapping geometric shapes, sublime contrasts, and palpable surface texture creates a visual field of stunning breadth. Martin likes to manipulate his materials in order to enhance the lustre of his paintirgs, ‘There’s an order of transformation that takes place throughout the paintings, and thafs only a vehicle to express the dynamic power of the medium itself, within the context of the material of these paintings,” he noted. Martin’s stylistic devices uphold the primacy of the picture plane while imbuing it with a tangible quality. ‘The Abstracted SymbolismImplicitintheMaterialofl)aint” (1988) contains dark forebodings of the human condition. A profile silhouette of an old screaming man can be seen amongst assorted, disembodied shapes and a sinister black background. For the most part, the eleven paintings on display avoid the imperatives of objectivity, instead concentrating on the formal considerations oftexture, contour and rigid abstraction. The gallery’s excellent spatial configuration and lighting improv& the over& impression ofthe &t w&k on display and endows it with statuesque dignity. In the end, Martin’s art is about creative freedom and establishing a dialogue with the viewer, something he attaches great value to. ‘What is implicit to art is that it’s grounded on a kind of collective foundation of an accumulat&e knowi*e,” he said. “rhe viewer is building on it for their own means. Thats the beauty of painting.”

MBM started slowly, but the energy level rose when they broke into “She’s Unreal,” one of the best songs from their new CD. The large drum beat ln this song, reminiscent of Tricky’s “Overcome,” was only accentuated by Jack Dangers pla*g the electric drum pads with traditional drum sticks to give a very sharp, energetic sound. Most of the songs featured. very complex, organic beats which were created by both live and electric drums. Unlike mqst electronic bands, MBM used a lot of live instruments in their set, rather th& just samples. Immediately after “She’s Unreal,“MBM broke into some of their older, heavier material, Jack Dangem+ man with a missb~ which really got the crowd gophoto bv Reni Chan ing. The set featured a fairly even balance of both old and new material. sages than the first. There was no jungle When a band has undergone as many this time around, just really good techno changes as Meat Beat Manifesto, it can be trance music. Unfo&nateIy,- by the time hard toplease both fans of the older matePaterson returned for his second set, my riai and newer stuff, but MBM seemed to ears were just worn out. I would have do a pretty good job. preferred it if he had spun some of the Paterson returned immediately as ambient chill out music he’s famous for, MBM were leaving the stage and spun his but I guess I’ll have to wait until the next second set of the evening. This set was time the Orb come through town to hear mellower and featured more ambient pas- something like that.

~i;:~~~~~~~:-.

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club abstract has changed :~:~:~y~:::~:~.~ ,.:.:-~:.:.:.~.:.:.:.:., ...f.... *.,.,. ‘.-...‘I.‘.*.-.-. .-:+y.~+:.;.‘:. .:.*:~R;.:-~:.;.:.:.:.,:.. ..,.a.-55 ..-..::...*,.:.. . ..I........... :.:.:.‘.*~.:*:.:r.:.:.: ......: wt~industrial wednesdw s with iephreak ,:.:: ._. .._._.,.,..,, _.,..,..., :f*:~:.~:.~:.:‘*:.: I’.-.~.‘.~.‘.‘.‘.‘.~.‘.~.‘. . ,~.‘*~.~.‘.~,‘.‘.‘.‘.‘.‘.‘.‘.~. ::::~~::::::::::i::‘:::~::., :.>: ~*5-,~...-.‘.‘,~.‘.‘.‘.‘.‘.‘.‘.‘.’.’.’.’. .f.~.:=..:.::.:.‘~.:.~.:.; .. .,.*.. . +.,I ..I .I,., I ,...,.. _.._., .....,. .,‘.’ cutting edge altemat ive *‘,S ,.*.*.,.. ,.,. * .,......., ,...,.,. .:a>>‘.>>) 1..‘.‘.‘.‘.‘.’

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ARTS

IMPRINT,

by Bill WharGe special to Imprint

ne of the many differ ences between CKMS and the “other” radio stations is that we don’t play the same kind of music all the time. Cummercial radio stations need to attract and hold a specitic demographic, say, 18 to 24-yearold males. To do this they develop a playlist and rotation that appeals to that audience. They can then ccsellnthat audience to advertisers. It is inoffensive, non-challenging radio, radio that you can leave on all the time and will never surprise you. We don’t need, or want, to do that. Our mandate is to provide programming you won’t find anywhere else. Thisleads to apotential problem. You can tune in to CKMS one night and hear a rap priigram,

ElectrolysisFacids- ChemicalPeels Acne& Warts CryotherapyMoleRemoval HassleFreeHIVScreening

22, 1996

Friday, November

but another night you might hear jazz. This isn’t necessarily bad. By listening to CKMS you’ll be exposed to a wide variety of music. But if you’re looking for a specific style or genre of music, you need a Program Guide. CKMS publishes a Program &de at the start of each term. In it you will find a schedule chart and program descriptions that will help you find the programs you are interested in. For those with internet access, our program listings (and more) are available on our web site. At http://watservI. uwaterloo.ca/-ckmsinfo you’ll find not only our program schedule, but lots of other information abouf CKMS as well. You can look at our weekly charts-listings of the top 35 releases as determined by actual airplay. Many of our volunteer programmers have their own web sites, and we

provide links from our pages to theirs. There’s background information about CKMS, a short tour of the station, information about how to volunteer, and even a map to help you find us out here in the beautiful Bauer Warehouse. Finally, there are links to over two dozen campus and commu&y radio stations across Canada. Our web site is short on graphics and long on information. When you visit our site there are no long waits for complex graphics to load. If you think the site looks a bit austere, this is by design--information yes, pretty pictures no. So if you have tuned in to CKMS and didn’t like what you heard, perhaps you’ll find something you like if you try on a different day or time. Check out our Program Guide (in either paper or electronic form) and try some focused radio listening.

What a Change is Here!

Full TimeMedicalStaff & CertifiedEsthetician

continued

from

at times, and never page:::: 1, ~. two..tbe : Add .,. . ., y...., _., :.:.:.:.j.:::: ‘,.,out :, ,:;;,.:the .:,’ words ,,, ::::. ‘..,‘A:: .:x .:.;y:v.:.>x>: . .,.,.~ to,. those ‘.‘. ._:::,.. _’:.:.:.:: :talents ::.:: :_..:;: _,_, ,,,,.: :..._. ::’ .1.:. :.:.:: ,,;::,:A,:, _:.::: :..-‘.’ .,._..:,:.: ,,i..,: ‘.:jf::. ::)j;:,., .i. i..:(.‘.. .‘.. i:‘$F;; :.s:::y:, .... .A ...A i .~~~~~ru*:~~e~y,l;~ Venq&.-i$”ii&ti,;ti$$; of place l

T. Polevoy,MD

AnneLeccas,CPE

105University Ave.8 W&r Waterloo

The

casting

w;is

~~e~e~~~~i

‘.. It’s“‘.‘&shame that the soundd of *e actors md a&ases s$&# Sou*~~~ccent), ~~~ So~~~~‘~ tra~‘.CD is ~ of the alternative . .:<+ .I.. l’.:.:::+ :.:.I and S~~~~~~ed I+&:.:.‘: s&i’but hopefitlly someone will up to the task of this fti. A&J postel~~ (in a ‘~~~e-ste~~:: :l: come to *eir SeflSeSmd put out a from their acting talents, all og&j$ :.:........ .:1.(f .::,‘J:i>i,‘.:. ..;: p&&@@e asFa~~~~awren~~, ‘::I talents in this film looked pt$&& :,., .. ..y:;:;: ;jf score&+ And it should include ::::: : :;;;,;I,,$:;:‘: . :>..,. ,..., ..,. _.__ :.<... ,y: ::.,. and ~:i.~,cornes::~~~~.~end~: ::;:the ,b@&hoir version of ‘When for their parts. _..__ ._I. :.:+. ,_ _: __.. ..,_ .i:.;::‘:;; ,3:.en&& ;‘&ffdFS,:” :,E$&jj .p$fi’k ,j:..‘D& -cry,” *e mOSt bautiful h Romeo, Leon&&$. i....’ Dry .L.. Leguizamo, who I’m normally song in the fh. Caprio was tremendous, captur-Before seeing Romeo and ing all the pathos and emotion of not fond of, was great as Tybalt. The unheralded star of this Juht, I’d yet to meet another the character. His body language film is the music. While ROPWO person who really enjoyed this ’ and facial expressions were per($b

;.‘&&s

Julie~~~-,@othe~~

i;i 5::

So real, you Can smell. the grass

Sega Worldwide Soccer ‘97 sega satllm by James Russell Imprint slaff

ell, the only obvious flaw of this game is that England doesn’t win all ofthe time. But other than that, this is the best soccer game I’ve ever played, no doubt about it. It looks good, it sounds good, it’s pretty realistic, ad most importantly, it’s a lot of fkn. There are numerous options to start with. Day game or night? Clear day or raining? Penalties and of&ides on or off? Once you’ve got these sorted out, you can Cddie with your team’s style and which players you warn starting on the pitch. Players are rated in many different categories but have overall colour ratings to make substitutions quick and easy. Most sports games’commen-

PC CD-ROM by Matt Feldman Imprint staff

ou’ve heard it all before. The year is two-thousand something;

humans

have

decimated Earth, the aliens are coming to really kick some ass and blah blah blah. The next chapter of this continuing saga is&W tered Steel, the latest in the Battletecb style of games, taking place on a newly discovered world.

tary is really monotonous, but the commentary in Worldwide Soccer is great. For each scenario (a goal kick; a penalty,. a goal, etc) there is a wide variety of comments from the announcer. mat’s not in the rules!” says the commentator tier a nasty tackle. “And it looks even worse in the replay. The referee’s decision is totally justified.” Speaking of tackles, the computer is really pretty good at judging bad hits. But some refs give a lot ofyellow cards, and some don’t. Every game is different. And, yes, if you just want violence, turn off the penalties and beat the hell out of each other. These inconsistencies really add to the realism. I played one game (as England, of course, though there are about thirty teams from around the world to choose from) against Russia, and went to penalty kicks tier a O-O tie. The next game I got my ass kicked 3-O. You can shoot high or low, p&s along the ground, or lob it over people down to your guys in front of the net with the A,B and C buttons, and you use the flippers to either sprint or change who you are controlling. Precise control is easy to learn, but, like in real soccer, almost impossible to master. A large part of the tension in this game comes from the fact that so many shots are just a little -. wide or a little high. Every element of this game has been considered, right down to how people fall when they take a ball in the face, which happens

ne of the few redeeming qualities of Sega Inc. is that it probably has the best baseball garie on thi market. I wasn’t sure how they could improve on World Series Baseball anymore, but they did. The game play is still the easiest of any baseball game I’ve ever played. Qf course, the old staple known as a home run contest is

Your enemy is a hybrid breed of aliens that combines the best structural features of living and mechanical creatures. Is it2 hype, or is there substance to this game? Sort of both, actually. The game is rc~n through a graphical interface that44echrP%Wplayers will find rather fmiliar-too familiar to call original. Many stylings are straight out of Mechrrhor, with familiar features like the holographic projection of terrain, vehicles and mament setup. &battered Steil has superb ingame graphics with its detailed aliens and vehicles, complex structures and textured terrain that can actuallybedamaged byyourweapens. But before you go reshaping

stantially smaller than those of Mecbwmior. host three times smaller than the average CLMech,” in fact. The first frame you take on weighs in at a measly -13 tons. This is a much simpler game. There’s so much less to c&rol and think about. You won’t find jets on your vehicle or banks of weapons to use in various combinations. External viewing is almost non-existent with a single, almost useless external per+&tive. Lacking are @er tGn&ike navigation points, inspection of structures and other features &at have resulted inMecbtz+i+? extreme popularity. I$ makes playing more fun for people who aren’t looking for a complex, detailed game, but on the other side of the

mountains,

coin,

you’ll

need

earn

your weaponry in the slow and difFicult process of advancing through levels. When you eventually get a decent stockpile, you’re severely limited in what you can carry into battle, asthese “Runners” are sub-

with some regularity (I once scored this way). The graphics and sounds are excellent, there’s a lot oftension, and when you actually score, it’s sweet. One of the most entertaining sports games I’ve ever played.

still there, so that you too can be Ken Griffey Jr. and deck a fat pitch 500 feet into the tight. The graphics are superb, the sound is great, and the game flows really well. The multiple available views of the action are cool as well. All of the rosters have been updated to their current states, and the two expansion teams for next year, the Axizana Diamondbacks and the Tampa Bay Devil Rays, are also ‘in there, presum-ably to be the teams you .want to play for a relatively easy win. The game has also made improvements over its predecessor. It is now -8~2~4 easier to get a double when you hit the ball to the wall in the outfield, something that was nearly impossible in the first version. You now also have a choice of playing in all of the major league stadiums, including 3Com (the stadium formerly known asCandlestick) Park.

The only real problem that 1 have with this game is the same lack of realism that was evident in the original. The day that Greg Maddux throws a 90+mph fatball and a nasty forkball is the daythat baseballhaslabourpeace. In fact, every pitcher in this game has the same five pitches: fastball, curveball, forkbail, of&peed, and screwball, also known as the infamous %crewgie.” Every pitcher in baseball has different pitches, and hopefully this is an improvement that they will make in World Series Baseball III. .One good side of the lack of realism aspect is that there is no Bud Selig, no Donald Fehr, and no money in this game. There are no strikes, no lockouts, md no generd ladour unrest. You know that t&x-e will be baseball when you play World Series Baseball II, and that just may be the best part of this game.

a:*,:

World

Series Baseball Sega

Saturn

by Jeff Peeters Imprint staff

it takes

away

Corn

886-

1200

anywhere anytime l for people or parcels airwwt service l fast Courteous service

the real-

ism of the whole &ing. With so much potential both in single and n&work game modes, I can only hope another release is in the hture combining these f~~asticgraphics and sound with more in-depthgame play.

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by Justin Mathews Imprint staff Oh, great, just what the world needs! Another tribute album! UK, this one’s different. This one is not just any tribute, it’s a tribute ti> Stompin’ Tom. At least thefre paying tribute to someone who deserves it. And it’s not a bunch of big name all-stars who have Ahing in common with the original artist. This is a bunch of local bands. More points for not having annoying pop stars. But what’s it sound like? First song: KA Tribute to Tom Connors” by Bud Roberts, the only nonStompin’ Tom song on here. Sounds great. This is ‘what country music should beStompin’ Tom would be proud of this one. AguyandaguitarandataleaboutaPEIlad called Tom &~ors. If f didn’t know better, I’d think this was Tom himself, complete with plywood stomping. This is good. Time for the next song, Black Cabbage doing ‘To It and At It.” I like this, It’s as catchy as any Stompin’ Tom song, but it’s Canadian indie rock at its finest. Stompin’ Tom translates well into the rodk format. A solid rock song, not cheesy and poppy like so much other crap I’ve heard lately, but solid, happy rock ‘n’ roll. “Sudbury Saturday Night,” always oneofmy favourites. I’m impressed: PondDog kept that drinking-song spirit while adding in all the essential rock ‘n’ roil elements. This would be good for a good old-fashioned slam dance.

by Patrick Imprint

Was staff

As a band, Hard Core Logo were a crew ofheavy-drinking, drug-abusing, foulmouthed punk rockers. As a movie, H&d C&e bgp was almost entirely hype; fortunately, the product itself, when actually examined, lived up to its billing. Not quite a soundtrack (none of the songs are from . the movie), not quite a tribute album (the band didn’t really exist, yknow), A Ttihte To Hard CoreLqgo (the CD) is itselfmostly hype. Anyone who enjoyed the music in Hard Cm Logo (the movie) will have to wait a while; that stuff was performed by Swamp Baby, and will be released sometime next year. For A T&z&e To Hard Cmv Togo, the bands involved were provided with the lyrics ofMichaelTurner (author of Hard CmLqgO: the book), and given complete freedom to write the music around the words. b There isn’t a single “punk” band on the tribute album; the Headstones and 54-40 come close, and their songs work primarily because Hard Core’ Lugo (the band) w~f;lc the Headstones and 54-40 (with a dash of the Demics and the Young Canadians for period authenticity). Most of the other big

names on the soundtrack fall short; Rusty, the Odds, and The Pursuit of Happiness are just a bit too generic to put any authenticity into their recreations. As the token US entry, however, Fishbone do a superfunky version of “Words and Music,” ptitting their Canadian major-label counterparts to shame. The Doughboys’ version of the climactic “Something’s Gonna Die Tonight” is good only because it doesn’t sound like that other Doughboys song. What works best on A Ttihte tu Hard Cwe Lo&o are the completely non-punk bands; the Dream Warriors’ hip-hop “Edmonton Block Heater,” The Lugen Brother’s acoustic “Son of a Bitch to the Core,” Chris Spedding’s soulful “China White” and Sol’s “Blue Tattoo” all sound nothing like Hard, Core Logo (the band), but give life to the lyrics in new and surprising ways. KinnieStartYCanadianBush I%$ is by far the‘standout track; Starr, with her far-reaching influences and styles, is one of Canada’s best new songwriters. Give her a chance and she could make even Alanis

Morisette’s

lyrics

seem

meaningful. Mier hearing Cub sing %ck shit up” on BOX ofHair, the “h” word in ‘Who The Hell Do YOU Think You Are?“’ isn’t shocking enough. For wer indie-rock credibility, the Super Friendz do

“Blue ,Tattoo,” but as much as I like the band, Son (whom I usually detest) do the same song, much better, Yes, there are three versions of Wue Tattoo” on A Triln&e.. ., and two each of &Son of a Bitch to the Core” and “Edmonton Block Heater.” But this compilation’s finest attribute is its diversity, even given the same lyrical bases. While the songs are hit-and-miss, there are more of the former than the latter, and the hits showcase some he songwriting. A Trilhte IQ Hard Cme baa doesn’t exactly live up to the hype, but like Hard Core Logo (the band) it still deserves a place in Canadian music.

Next up: the Lazlo Pink Variety. I’m not familiar with ‘The Black Donnelly Massacre,” and to hear this I’d never guess this was a Stompin’ - Tom song. This is incredible. I generally like music that’s a little more interesting than rock, but I’d never have expected that a Stompin’ Tom song could successllly be turned into a heavy, pseudo-industrial complete with JGThirweti- (Foe&s, Wiseblood) sounding distorted vocals. Lazlo pulled it off nicely. Another old favourite: “Bud the Spud,” as done by the Dissemblers (with Mitch Anderson). This track best catchesthe communal spirit of Stompin’ Tom-no instruments, just one man Singing the verses and a room full of people joining in on the chorus ad clap$nghands. And, of course, stompin’ theit%&What more could anyone ask for? Shannon Lyon closes the collection with a great rendition of ccBen.nytheBum.” This t&k reminds me most of Stompin Tom. Shannon Lvon doesn’t sound llike him, but this is tr!ue to the story-telling, guitar-playing nature of Stompin’ Tom that we’ve all learned to love.

by Klaus Steden Imprint staff The subtitle on this is A De!kate Depen&ncy. On Prozac, perhaps.. . Mzkc$w Vampiresonly serves to prove the point that major labels know nothing about niche markets. This hokey attempt at impressing the goth %cene” starts out with a whiny bit of twaddle by some douchebag about his frost “80th” girlfriend40 we care? The disc isn’t even labeled properly-it has twelve tracks, but lists only ten. The music itself isn’t bcrll, but fi extremely ill-suited. There’s neo-hippie Love and Rockets stufK,aNico ballad, a Cocteaus tune, some Dead Can Dance, two poorly selected Bauhaus songs (“Hollow Hills” and “Crowds”), as well as some classical music featured in Z%eHunpyr. There is NOAlien Sex Fiend, no Attrition, no Christian Death, no Cramps, no Play Dead, no Red Lorry Yellow Lorry, no Virgin

Prunes,

nothing.

The only

redeem-

ing song is the Birthday Party’s “Release the Bats.” Mti@ Vamfiyes should have wriggled, kicked, and screamed; instead, it merely whimpered. I suppose I should have expected as much when I heard that station in Toronto hawking it.

IMPRINT,

Friday,

November

by James Russell Imprint staff From

amongst

the monotony

of Toronto bands that all sound the same, Neck is emerging asone of the best up-and-coming bands I’ve heard in a while. All &pmher LonB is their second U-length release, and it shows a lot of prom1x.

Recorded on a small budget, Guided by Voices references are hard to avoid as far assound goes, but that doesn’t begin to cover the influences I hear on this album. My Bloody Valentine, the Pixies, the Carpenters, maybt: a hint of Mission of Burma; the list could go on and on. The guitars are everywhere. From as clean cut as Ward and June Cleaver to a deep watetid roar ofdistortion, and everywhere in between. Some Pychcandyesque noise nicely rounds out some songs. I can’t tell if it is right to call this album punk. It’s a little angry at times, and usually yea& fast, but there’s so much emphasis on melody that punk just can’t be the right word. LCAutistic” is the smash hit on

I-

VOLUNTEERS

8e a Big Sisters Volunteer! Training sessions commence Sept. 16,18,23/96 or Nov. 5.7.12/96. Please call 743-5206. Wanted: energetic,enthusiastic young women to be Spark, Brownie, Girl Guide or Pathfinder leaders. Within the university vicinity. For info call Lynne at 8848098. Volunteer driving force: do you have a car and some free time? Drivers needed to drive seniors from their home to a senior day program. Mileage is reimbursed. Contact Volunteer Services 8884488. Volunteers needed to assist with answering phone, typing and customer service in a busy office environment. Requires at least a one year commitment. Contact Volunteer Services aaaWaterloo Oxford District Secondary School in Baden is looking for volunteers to help out with Special Ed Department. Excellent experience for students wanting to go to Teachers College or Social Service field. Contact Bill Bond at 634-5441 between 8:OO am & 4:OO pm. Volunteers needed to work with preschool children in child care settings. No previous experience with children required. 2-3 hours per week. Great experience, call Bill at Notre Dame of St. Agatha Preschool Support Service 741Lexington Public School is looking for enthusiastic volunteers to work with students in classrooms, in small groups or on an individual basis. Call Brigitla at

CIUT (U of T radio) as I understand it, and I can see why. The verse is a jangly tease, followed up with a solid boot to the head of serious distortion in the chorus. Lead vocalist Dave Rodgers does some of his best work on this track, demonstrating a surprising range and hitting the high notes with great clarity. “Autistic” is also the longest track, clocking in at an epic 2:24, making it the longest song by about half a minute. But fear not, with 20 tracks, there’s plenty of music on this cassette, and lots of different sounds to sample. If you think that all Toronto bands are boring twats, pick up Neck and think again.

747-3314 if vou are interested. Kitchener Parks and Recreation - for info regarding the following call Deb 7412226: Exploring Leisure Volunteers needed! If you are available Friday evenings between 7 and 10 pm, you could assist a group of adults with a disability to “explore leisure.” This might include going to a hockey game, learning a new craft or going swimming. Admission to recreation events is provided for volunteers. Get in the Swim! Aquatic volunteers needed for men, women and children with disabilities. Will adapt to your schedule. Receive free pool pass. Male volunteers are urgently needed. Calling all Card Sharks! Male volunteer required for weekly card game with young gentleman. Time/location flexible. Like music, playing pool, conversation? Male volunteer sought to accompany young adult to community drop-in program, Sundays 1 to 3 pm. (day and time flexible) URGENTLY NEEDED! Male volunteer to assist young boy new to community in soccer program, Wednesday evenings from 6 to 8 p.m., November to March. Learn about a different culture while you show a new immigrant how to be a part of our community. For more information , call the K-W YMCA Host Program at 579-9622. Make a difference in a child’s life1 Friends, a service of Canadian Mental Health Association Waterloo Regional Branch, is seeking volunteers to support children one-to-one to develop their self esteem and social skills. Call 744-4806 ext. 335. Artists & Writers: The Waterloo Com-

ARTS

22, 1996

by Paul Holloway special to Imprint “. . .Those

with

a strong

con-

stitution may dare to consume it as a whole. Dig in...” Vai’s new album, all 74 minutes and I8 tracks of it, features him singing for the frost time in 4 albums. His previous success has been completely as an instrumentalist; potentially the most technitally innovative rockguitarist since Joe Satriani or Eddie Van I-Ialen. Vai has had tours of duty with Zappa, David Lee Roth and Whitesnake; asa singer, however, he’s actually quite good. F’ire Garden is divided into two parts, the first halfcontaining all instrumentals. Right from the first song, ‘There’s A Fire In The House,” Vai unleashes his uncanny ability for inventive rifl% and guitar effects. Heavy, lowend patterns, complex phrases, and ofkn wickedly fast playing all weave together tastefblly. The next track, ‘The Crying Machine,” has a distinct jazz-rock feel, complete with slap-bass. A wide variety of styles and feelings lead up to the instrumental section’s closer, and the IO-minute title track, “Fire

munity Arts Centre needs you. Volunteers wanted to sit on programming committee, organize drop-in artist sessions, design posters and more. Call 886-4577 City of Waterloo Volunteer Services needsvolunteers. Call 886-6488 for more info regarding the following positions; Aquatic: to assist with Red Cross swimming classes for Winter 1997. Votunteers must have completed RLSSC Bronze Medallion and be at least I4 years of age. Sessions begin Jan. 6 to Mar. 9. Off ice Assistants: answering all Home Support phone calls, typing and customer service in a busy office environment. You must have office experience, be able to type accurately and have good communication skills. Computer skills are an asset. One year commitment, Mondays from t to 4:30 p.m. Library: to assist individuals with special needs in selecting reading material and delivering books to their home, as well as return previously borrowed material. Familiarity with Library and access to a vehicle are an asset. Waterloo Community Arts Centre Needs Volunteers. Poster design, special events, office work, programming and much more. Help your local arts community. Call 886-4577 or stop by 25 Regina St. S. Reaching Out ‘96: Volunteers needed to assist

with a fundraiser/educational

event in aid of a local shelter. Call Michael at 744-6507. Volunteers needed - make a new friend, learn about another culture! Help a new Canadian learn English. Two hours weekly, four month commitment. Training provided. Kitchener-Waterloo Multicultural Centre. Phone 7452531.

Garden Suite.” Building on odd time signatures, the song begins with heavy guitar doubled by synth. Quickly adopting an Eastern feel, atonal, impatient rhythms create an almost Yes-sounding passage. Half’ way through Vai summons up the most wicked of guitar rfi and changes the mood completely. The highlight of the album, this is not an easy listen. Mer such a brilliant first half, why abandon this style in favour of a more contemporary vocal/ guitar format for the remainder of the album? This was a risk Vai was obviously prepared to take. The second phase of the album, with six vocal tracks, is, surprisingly, what makes Fh Garden shine. The ferocious soloing and lightning-fast licks don’t disappear, but take a back seat to the groove-laden “Little Alligator” and sensitive %other,” amongst other brilliant tracks. This second halflets Vai experiment with the combination of vocal and guitar parts, both complementing each other without compromise. The album closes with the instrumental ‘Warm Regards,” a perfect balance between perfiormante and restraint. Fire Garden is a masterpiece both of song writing and showmanship, and hopefully garners Steve Vai the respect he deserves outside guitar magazine circles.

by Patrick Imprint

Wtis staff

In a way, Gladrub’s ihpban DYZ+~~ Sta$us is prototypically Canadian-plain, understated and virtually lacking in identity. Even the CD booklet fails to have any personality (the inside is nothing more than a black and white picture of five men in suits; there are more words in this review than on the entire album). Its not btififl-these guys are quite good musicians. Yet Gladrub practice a f&m of rock ‘n’ roll most often found in an island just OK the shore of Europe, where catchy riffs are traded for more expansive, cerebral themes. It’s called Brit-pop, and I fmd it best used for going to sleep CO.

A dozen listens to Cbpban Lhg Statzo and I can’t recall a single bit of it, except that I tapped my toes a lot and nodded off a couple times. It’s not my cup of Orange Pekoe-but if you dug iTatva,” it could be yours.

@M@L

UPCOMING EVENTS FRIDAY. NOVEMBER 22 Hundreds of Final Exam Survival Kits (FESK) have been purchased by UW parents for students. Watch for YOUR name in the Nov. 22 issue of Imprint! Details of where to pick up your FESK will be included in the announcement. SATURDAY, NOVEMBER 23 Renison Institute Ministry Session: PCt4, The Small Christian Fellowship Group. Two or three can learn how to get such a group started with a method which has transformed churches everywhere. For more info call 884-4404 ext. SUNDAY, NOVEMBER 24 K-W Chamber Music Society-57 Young Street West, Waterloo (1 block West of Albert, overlooking Waterloo Park) Judith Davenport, viola. 8:00 pm. For ibfo call 886-1673. TUESDAY, NOVEMBER 26 Presentation: Wind Energy 11:30 12:30 at the Engineering Lecture Hall, room 211. Overview of current situation of wind energy technology in Canada. For details e-mail joberhol@ mechanical or call 579-2198.. Waterloo Wellington Myalgic Encephalomyelitis Association invites KW area Chronic Fatique Syndrome sufferers, their family and friends to a support group meeting at the Adult Recreation Centre, 185 King St. S. Please call our info line for scheduled time: 623WEDNESDAY, NOVEMBER 27 Gay and Lesbian Liberation of Water100 coming-out discussion group. Topic:

“Gaydar: Does it Exist?” 7:30 p.m. Social follows at 9 p.m., HH 378. Mee’? old friends and make new ones. All welcome. Details: 884-4569. FRIDAY, NOVEMBER 29 Conference on Housing in Waterloo: Overview of Homelessness in Waterloo Region. Victoria School Centre, 25 Joseph St. Free transportation to and from. Fee child care provided. 7 - 10 pm. For more info call 746-4090. SATURDAY, NPVEMBER 30 1 Conference on Housing in Waterloo: Action Workshops. Victoria School Centre, 25 Joseph St. Free transportation to and from. Free child care provided. 12 - 6 pm. For more info call 7464090. -

TUESDAYS To become a better public speaker, read in public and build your confidence, join the Christopher Leadership Course. This course begins Sept. 17 to Nov. 26/96 from 7 to IO p-m. Students $90.00 (books included), adults $1 IO. For more info call Joanne at (519) 7446307. Every 2nd and 4th Tuesday KW Sexual Assault Support CentrelDrop-in Group. Women sexually assualted as teen/adult: Emmanuel United Church corner of Bridgeport and Albert. 1:OO 3:00 om. Info 571-0121. Every Tues. & Wed. IO week course designed to prepare people writing the Test of English as a Foreign Language exam. Sept. 24 to Nov. 27/96 from 2:00 to 4:30 pm- Register at International Student office NH2080 or call ext. 2814 for details. THURSDAYS An English Language Lab/class. Sept. to Dec. in Modern Languages from I:30 to 2:20 p.m. Students, faculty, staff and spouses welcome. For info call International Student Office ext. 2814. FRIDAY English Conversation Class in Needles Hall 2080. Sept. to June from 2:00 to 400 p.m. Students, faculty, staff and -spouses welcome. For info call International Student Office at ext. 2814 SUNDAYS Emmanuel United Church Young Adults Group welcomes university students. Service IO:30 am. Social Group 7:00 pm. 22 Bridgeport Rd. (comer of Albert and Bridgeport}. FASS Wrhters Meetings: join fellow writers, comedians and thespians in the creation of the 35th Anniversary, FASS ‘97 Script! This yea& theme is King Arthur. h&104,7-9 p.m.

The FASS Fall Kick-off! The fun starts now as we write the script, design the sets and plan the parties for our annual Musical Comedy in February. DC1301, 7:30 p.m. http://math.uwaterloo.ca\-fass The Depressive & Manic-Depressive Association for Waterloo Region is a selfhelp, support group. We provide info, education & support to anyone who has the illness as well as family members and friends. For info call 884-5455. University of Library Electronic Data Services has revised office hours and added some service effective Oct. 15/96. The new office hours (Porter Library Room 222) are: Tues. IO:30 a.m. - 12:30 p.m.; Wed. 3:30 p.m. - 4:30 p.m. Please contact the UMD Library @ x2795 for specific times. THERE ARE MANY UNCLAIMED OSAP LOAN DOCUMENTS in the Student Awards Office, 2nd floor, NH. Don’t delay. Pick up your loan documents by Nov. 22/ 96. This is an urgent reminder to students who are not returning to school in Jan. 97. Unclaimed loans will be cancelled and returned to the Ministry of Education if they are not picked up. Lantern Light tours at Doon Heritage Crossroads. Tickets are now on sale for Dec. 6,7,13,14,20 and 21 at 7 pm or 8:30 pm. Tickets are $8 per person. “Starry Night” tickets are now on sale for Dec. 23 at 6:30 - 9:30 pm. Tickets are $15 per adult and $7.50 per child. Call 748-l 914. SNOWGA TOGA - get ready, its coming on Jan. 18 will be the first every SNOWGA TOGA at Bingeman’s Park. $5 includes bus. Watch for ticket sales. MathSoc is collecting gifts for Operation Christmas Child. For more information contact Karen (kakopciu@ barrow) or call MathSoc at 888-4779. HUNDREDSOFFlNAtEXAMSURVlVAL KlTS (FESK) have been purchased by UW parents for students.Check out page 2 in this paper. “A Dickens Christmas” through song and word, put on by the Elora Festival Singers. Sunday, Dec. 8 at 3 p.m, at St. John’s Church Elora. Buy your tickets early since last years show was a sold out performance! Call 846-0331 for info and tickets. Canada World Youth past participants that are interested in forming a Waterloo regional volunteer network to help the Ontario Regional Off ice should contact Aleisha at adhowlel@artsul.watstar.uwaterloo.ca or 725-!X62. Queen Elizabeth Silver Jubilee Awards Several $5,000 scholarships are being offered to undergraduate students across Canada to study at another Canadian university in their second official language (French or English). Candidates must be Canadian citizens or permanent residents, currently enrolled in the second or third year of their first undergraduate university program. Students must have sufficient ability in their second official Iangauge. Application Deadline: Jan.31.97. For more info and application forms, contact Student Awards Off ice. Exchanges to France or Germany for 1997-98: awards of $1,200 to undergraduates and graduates. Deadline January 101 97. Forms available from your dept. or Rehana Merali, NH, room 3015

IANNCUNCEMNTS St. Paul’s United College has rooms available for Winter ‘97 and Spring ‘97 terms. Please call 885-l 460 or drop by for application forms and a tour! The Faculty of Applied Health Sci89~8s is pleased toannounce the opening of the UW-CMCC Chiropractic Research Clinic in the new addition to BC Matthews Hall. Call 888-4567 ext. 5301 for an appointment. Rooms in the Village Residence are available for immediate occupancy. Inquire at the Housing Office, Village 1 or phone 888-4567 ext. 3704 or 3705 for further information on the villages. English as a Second language, SecJndary School Credits, and Upgrading classes for adults at St. Louis Adult learning Centres. 75 Allen St. E. Waterloo 7451201 or 291 Westminster Dr. N ,Cambridge 650-I 250. Padanla Players needs plays to perform! Any local playrights with short, witty scripts please bring them to the Imprint office. Please attach name and ohone number. Attention Bluevale AlumnilBCl’s 25th Reunion is May 30 - June l/97. The Reunion committee is presently compiling a mailing list. It is important that they receive your address now. Please write the school clo 25th Reunion, 80 Bluevale St. N. Waterloo, NW 3R5, call the Hotline at 650-0569 or e-mail at http:/www.sentex.net/-dabrykys/ ‘I 0ci.reunion. Distinguished Teacher Awards To nominate your outstanding professor, demonstrator or teaching assistant for the Distinguised Teacher Award, contact TRACE, MC4055 Ext. 3132. Deadline: Feb.7/97

and financial need. Deadline: Jan. 101 97 Tom York Memorial Award-available to all for short fiction-not essays. Students to contact St. Paul’s United College for further information. Deadline: Dec. 31196

faculty

LSAT-MCAT-GMAT-GRE on campus PREP! Flexible formats including weekends for $195. Instant info: prep@istar.ca or http:// www.srerxom. Richardson - Since 1979 - l-800-41 O-PREP. . .

of _Applied Health Sciences:

Models and actors needed by agency for local, Toronto and international representation. Skills workshops available. For an appointment tail ‘The Look’ Company. 743-6550. Cash paid nightly for ex erienced sales reps-fundraisers. Six days @ a week, 5:30-8:30 pm, l 8 per hour guaranteed. Call today, start 1L tomorrow, Kent I -800-447-l 826, leave message.

Mark Forster Memorial Scholarshipavailable to 3rd or 4th year Kinesiology. Deadline: Jan. 31/97 Michael Gellner Memorial Scholarshipavailable to 36 Kinesiology or Health Studies. Deadline: Mar. 31/97 Robert Hawo,rth Scholarship-completion of 3rd year in an honours program in resource management related to Park Planning and Management, Recreation, Natural Heritage or Outdoor Recreation. Deadline: May 31/97 RAVUCO-available to 2nd,3rd or 4th year Recreation and Leisure Studies. Deadline: Jan 31/97

Sublet Available Winter. One room, stvlish three bedroom. Uptown Waterloo. $225 month inclusive. Nii=e roomates, close to evenrthina. 746-3311. Private room available with kitchen, laundn/ facitities free, shared -. -bath. $300. per month. Phone: 578-3698. Excellent Accommodation, dignified setting, mature student. Close U.W,O. - Masonville. Nicely furnished room or apt. (shared kitchenette). Parking, (recreation) ping pong, cable. Bedding & linen sunolied. 1609 Richmond. 438-7615. 3 rooms available, 5 bedroom house. Winter term $300, summer $200 fall inclusivel. 20 minute walk to UW. Call 747-0960.

Faculty of Arts: Concordia Club Award-available to 3rd year Regular or 3A Co-op Germanic & Slavic. Deadline: Jan. 31/97

Faculty of Engineerin% Andersen Consulting Scholarshipavailable to 38. Deadline: Mar. 31/97 Canadian Hospital Engineering So& ety’s Scholarship-available to 3B. Deadline: Mar. 31/97 Consulting Engineers of Ontario Scholarship-available to all 38. Deadline: Mar. 31197 John Deere Limited Scholarship-available to 38 Mechanical. Deadline: Mar. 31/97 Delcan Scholarship-available to 4A Civil. Deadline: Feb. 28/97 Randy Duxbury Memorial Award-available to 38 Chemical. Deadline: Mar. 31 I 97 S.C. Johnson & Son Md.Environmental Scholarship-available to 3rd year Chemical. Deadline: May 31/97 Ontario Professional Engineers Foundation Undergraduate Scholarshipavailable to all 28 8t 3B based on extracurricular and marks. Deadline: Nov. 29/96 Marcel Pequegnat Scholarship-available to 3B Civil,Water Resource Management students. Deadline: May 31/ 97

Facultv of Environmental studies: Shelley Ellison Memorial Award-available to 3rd year Planning. Deadline: Nov. 29/96 Robertliaworth Scholarshipavailable to 3B Park Planning and Management, Recreation, Natural Heritage and Planning. Outdoor Education. Deadline: May 31/97 Marcel Pequegnat Scholarship-available to 3rd year Environment & Resource Studies, Planning, Water Resource Mgt. Deadline: May 31/97

I’m looking fo or bachelor. Call Brian @I 571-7163.

Alone with your unplanned pregnancy? Discover your options. Call 579-3990.

arking, roomates

f3irthright offers support.

s Too busy? Christmas baking available. A variety of cakes, cookies and pies. Drop off on campus. Call 653-3755.

Spring BreakCanada’s Premier Student Travel Co! Party in CANCUN for as little as $399!!!! Find out how to go for FREE & earn EXTRA CASH!!! Call 8001798-I 509

DEADLINEFORCWSSIFIEDS isMondays at 5p.m, atheIMPRINT office SlC1116 CLASSIFIED RATES: studentrates: $3.120 wordsi.15$ afler20/t GST non-student: $5.120 wordsl.25$ afler2OitGST business (student,non-student):$10.120 wards/.25$ after20/t GST

Faculty of Mathematics:

SCHQIARSHIPS

Applications for the following scholarships are being accepted during the Fall term. Refer to Section 4 of the Undergraduate Calendar for further criteria. Application forms are available in the Student Awards Office, 2nd Floor, Needles Hall.

ALL FACULTIES: Doreen Brlsbln Award-interested females entering 4th year in Spring or Fall 1997 in an Honours program in which women are under-represented. currently Deadline:Apr.30/97 Don Hayes Award-for involvement/contribution to athletics antior sports therapy. Deadline: Jan. 31/97 Leeds-Waterloo Student Exchange Program Award-students to contact John Medley, Mechanical Engineering. Mike Moser Memorial Award-available to 3rd or 4th year based on extracurricular

Andersen Consulting Scholarshipavailable to 38 Math. Deadline: Mar. 31/ 97 Electrohome 75th AnniversaryScholarship-available to 3B Computer Science. Deadline: Mar. 31/97 K.C. Lee Computer Science Scholarship-available to 28 Computer Science. Deadline: Nov. 29/96 Sun Life of Canada Award-available to 2nd year Actuarial Science. Deadline: Nov. 29196

Facultv of Science: David All. Forget Memorial Award in Geology-available to 2A Earth Science, see department. S.C. Johnson i Son Ltd. Environmental Scholarship-available to 3rd year Chemistry. Deadline: May 31197 Marcel Pequegnat Scholarship-available to 3B Earth Science/Water Resource Mgt. Deadline: May 31197

The following employment opportunities are now availabte. Interested applicants should respond directly to the contact indicated. Projectionist & Camera OperatarsAudio Visual Centre $9.00/hr. Flexible hours. Preference given to students with 4 terms to work. Contact Lenora Wilson at Ext. 5114 or report to the Audio Visual Centre Eng 2 1309.

Research In Motion Phone Tech Full Circle Foods University Acne Clinic Onward Computers Health Keeper Princess Cinema The Beat Goes On Fairview Acura Data Corn Dr. Disc Blue Dog Bagels

Fed Page Centre In The Square Travel Cuts Waterloo North Mazda Best Western Primrose Hotel Revolutions Alder School of Professional PsycholWY Vision Computers Hikers Haven UW Computer Store Ears 2 Hear