1996-97_v19,n20_Imprint

Page 1

The University of Waterloo Student Newspaper Volume 19, Number 20

Friday, November 29, 1996

CDN Pub.Mail Product Sales Agreement No.554677

IIIT ME!

: NEWS: Three more assaults near campus................page 3

FORUM: And you thought there was a lot of Romeo and Julietin last weeks Imprint...................................page 10 READER'S SURVBY: Now it's your turn to tell us what you think..:..............................................................page 15 FEATURES: Sex, drugs and a Moroccan..............page 16

SCIENCE:Cryptography's forbidden brute.........page i 8 SPORTS: After a dismal showing against #3 noted Guelph, the hockey Warriors rebound against the Varsity Blw........................................................................-19

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ARTS: Weezer, Star Trrk, and Hype! a (not so) serious : Grunge rockumentary...........................................P W 25


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Three assaults in two days Three more women assaultedon or near campus by Rob

Van

Imprint

Kruistum

staff

0

n the morning of Tuesday, November 26, two university students were sexually assaulted within a three hour period on or near the UW campus. A third assault was reported on Wednesday. At 7: 30 am. a woman was walking along the footpath next to the railroad tracks beside Engineering 3 when a man came up from behind her and grabbed her between her legs. He then grasped her breast. The woman pushed his hand away and told him to leaye but he grabbed her again. He left when she pushed him away. and started yelling. Her assailant was described as being between five feet four and five feet five inches tall with a dark complexion, a pock marked f ace and wearing a black nylon jacket. He was believed to be between 18 and 25 years old. The second incident took place at approximately 1O:lO a.m. on the path between Waterloo Park and Parking Lot C. The assailant jumped out of the nearby bushes and confronted the women in the same manner as the previous assault. He grabbed her crotch and breast before being shoved away. He grabbed her again and she again pushed him away. She started to walk away and he walked off in the opposite direction. The assailant ii &is case is described as being five feet five inches tall with a dark complexion, having bad acne scars and wearing a black jacket with a hood and carrying a black knapsack. He has brown eyes and’s light build. The third assault occurred Wednesday in parking lot C. The man was described as in his early 20s with a “pockmarked face.” These assaultscome after the arrest of Edgardo Esparza. Esparza, who was charged with five similar incidents which occured between August 14 and September 28 has been released on bail pending a court appearance. He has been banned from Waterloo as a condition of bail. On November 4, a student was assaulted while walking through Parking Lot C. Her assailant grabbed her and told her to come with him. She resisted and got away. The assailant in this case is described as five feet seven inches tall with a slender build, white and in his 20’s. He had short brown hair and was wearing a black-hooded sweatshirt with a Niagara Falls logo on it. Another attack that day occured in Kitchener as a woman was walking along a path in the Belmont Avenue and Burn Place area. A man grabbed her left buttock and when she turned she saw a man on an older style mountain bike. This assailant was described as being five feet five inches tall, white, with a severe case of acne and a round nose. He was between 18 and 20 years old.

Students can take precautions Although there appears to be a current rise in sexual assaults on or near the university campuses and around the K-W area, Laurie-Anne Reddick, a counsellor and advocate who works for the K-W Sexual Assault Support Centre is wary of appearances. uI don’t know if this is an

increase [in assaults] or if it means that more women are reporting it,” she says. She feels that “the focus needs to be on educating men to let them know that sexual assault is not acccptahle. My support and sympathy goes out to the women who were recently assaulted.” The best advice offered by many safetv groups is to always walk with a friend instead of alone. If ihere is no one to walk with, the Feds offer many sevices including the Safety Van (x3867) and W&Safe (888-4949 or x4944) which provide safe, free travel in the university area. If you need assistance due to car trouble, injury or any other emergency, there are yellow Help Line posts located at various locations around campus including, but not limitied to, Parking Lot A, the Optometry Path and between Vl and V2 on both the “Bible path” and by the Tutors Houses. Campus Police and WalkSafe can be reached from any campus phone, for free, by using the direct dial buttons,

Resources

for Victims

The following is a list of resources, all specifically for women, that are accessible 24 hours a day without fear of getting a busy signal. Tf you need to talk confidentially and don’t know where to turn, there is always someone available. Anseima House K-W Sexuai Assault Support Centre Sexual Assault Ccntre of Guelph or call toll free CMH Association Help line CMHA Youth Line

742-5894

741-8633 836-5710 l-800-265-7233 745-1166 745-9909

The K-W Sexual Assault Support Centre received 325 calls in September and 340 calls in October.

Trent profs on strike Classeshave been cancelled since November 12 by Karsten

Imprint

Tuesday, November 26. As a result, negotiations have now ceased and neither party has returned to the bargaining table. Midterms have now officially been delayed until January of 1997 and classes remain cancelled until an agreement has been reached, Considering the deadlock in negotiations, it seems likely that classes will not resume before the Christmas break. According to Matt Gailinger, Vice-President of Student Issues at Trent University, students on campus are sincerely “pissed off,” not only about the strike itself, but especially about the poor handling of the entire affair,

W. Gitter staEf

F

or the past two weeks, Trent University has been paralyzed by a faculty strike. The faculty association off~ially went on strike beginning midnight of Sunday, November 12 and has not yet resumed teaching. The conflict between the university’s administration and the facultv revolves around three main issues: pay parity, proportionality and pension. Facing massive funding cuts, the university considered it imDossible to meet the faculty’i demand for settlement parity to be maintained at the provincial average of a 0.8 per cent increase. Funding cuts also stand at the core if students the issue of proportionality. Trent’s faculty alliance remains firm in their demands to object further stafF reductions and insists that faculty sincerely “piss& OfJ: cuts should be proportionate

According to Matt Gallin&r, VicePresidkn t of Student Issues at Trent

~~a$;f~l~$~;;~~

r of a pending strike as early as April 1996, no * efforts had

University,

!ZXE~a~~~~~~~~ brought the same charge against the administration,

on campus are

to the university3

income

cuts

as implemented by the provincial government. Understandably, the faculty also strongly oppose the administration’s proposal to channel a surplus in the faculty’s pension fund into the university’s operating budget. As neither the administration nor the faculty was willing to budge on any of the three issues at hand, no settlement was reached by a self-imposed deadline of

.

.

E~JZE~~~~FL~~

and the profs.” Only a few weeks before the strike deadline, Trent’s student newspaper De A&m- had finally been able to obtain some information and had printed a couple of articles. Student organizations immediately scrambled furiously to stage various informative sessions and meetings. However, l

contimed

to page

4


4

NEWS

---

IMPRINT,

29, 1996

Friday, November

Federation named in lawsuit OUSA referendum at Queens precipitated lawsuit by Karsten Imprint

Bratu Lehrer in response to dfl OUSA lawsuit following a referendum campaign at Queen’s Uni versityin 1994-1995. Lehrer had headed the succcssfi~l ‘<No” campaign in the referendum to decide if Queen’s should continue its affiliation with OUSA. Due to legal restrictions, Michael Burns, Executive Director of OUSA, was unable to reveal the details of Lehrer’s accusations of defamation, but he emphasized that Lehrer’s “accusa-

W, Gitter staff

he University of Wa terloo Federation &Students has been named in a lawsuit against OUSA (Ontario Undergraduate Student Aliiance) . The Feds are mentioned along with the governing student bodies of the other member universities of OUSA: Toronto, Western, Windsor, Brock and Wilfrid Laurier. The suit is being fded bv Andv

T

tions as outlined in his statement of claim are a gross exaggeration and unequivocally false. Fkat out, there is simply no truth to them.” Feds Vice President Education Kelly Foley shared Burns’ sentiments about the integrity of Lehrcr’s claims and also raised another matter, namely Lehrer’s faulty filing of his statement of claim. Lehrer had failed to follow proper procedures of having one server delivering the claim. As a result, the statement had been received by the affected parties at various different times, a significant violation of legal procedures. The plaintiff Lehrer is suing for a grand total of $500,000, as

well as his legal costs. Of that half million dollars, $60,000 is listed as punitive, aggravated, and exemplarydamages, $40,000 is classified as general damages and another $40,000 is indexed as special damages. Both parties, however, are seeking an out-of-court settlement and a settlement proposal has already been offered by either side. Burns confirmed that OUSA was “very encouraged by recent discussions.” When Questioned about the possibili& of such a settlement being interpreted as an admission of guilt, Burns was quick to point out that “most cases never see the court room, but are resolved outside of

it.” As Burns fLrther argued, OUSA is %ery confident that UT have a very good case” and assured that OUSA was more than prepared to follow through with the suit, should no settlement be reached atier all. Kelly Foley reiterated Burns’statements and considers it to be in the best interest of UW students to get the entire affair resolved as quickly as possible. Although Foley expressed that the Feds have “‘no specific interest in suing or being sued,” she alsu made a point of emphasizing that the Feds are well prepared to break a long history of not suing “if that’s what the KUdents want.”

Classes on hold *continued

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this university, only to be treated in such an unfair manner.” Due to this treatment, students are siding with neither side in the con&t, in spite of some recent attempts by faculty to attract student support. While Gallinger expressed hopes that talks would resume by Monday, December 2, a settlcmcnt in the near future seems vcn’ unlikelv. A -prolonged strike beyond the Christmas break might*vew well jeopardize reading week, H prospect which does not sit too well-with students.

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entire academic year would have to be cancelied if the strike were to last longer than six weeks. Matt Callinger, however, dismissed these rumours and assured that “there was no risk of losing the entire year .” As negotiations collapsed on Tuesday, November 26, many students decided to leave campus and return home. Many students are so enraged and disappointed by the poor and unfair treatment that they are considering transferring to other universities. As Wendy Cooper pointed out, “I am paying good honey to attend

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many students on campus remained entirely unaware of the pending strike and were caught by surprise when they found their professors picketing+ outside the various buildings. As first year Environmental Science student Wendy Cooper stated, “most of us w&e totallv lek& the dark.” Various ruTmours were generated by the lack of titiormation made available and only added to the unsettling atmosphere among students. According to these rumours, the

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IMPRINT,

Friday, November

NEWS

29, 1994

Still tentative Alberta student party plan is questioned by Patrick special b

Lindsay Imprint

onfusion shrouds the University of Calgary Students’ Union plan to run a candidate in the spring provincial election. “Our commitment is still tentative,” said Gunnar

C

Benediktsson,

SU Vice-P&dent,

External. “he reason this was brought up was that student leaders are frustrated. Information campaigns aren’t working. No matter how many pamphlets we hand out, we’re not generating the media attention we need.” In the last SU by-election, students voted in favour of running a candidate. However, the plebiscite question allowed students to vote in favour of running an information campaign as well, which they also supported. “The wording was unfortunate,” said Renediktsson. “If I had to run it again I would have preferred to make students choose between the two.” To clariq student r,pinion, the SU will sunny 1000 students on December 4. The survey will ask students if a caI>didate should run, and if so, how that person should be choSCIl.

J3enediktsson said the survey is necessary to ensure support before deciding to proceed, because “if you do this with a low 1~~1 ofstuclcnt support, this could be a disaster.” Some Shldcm feel it would Ix a disaster anv~ay- “If you can raise funds to -run a campaign against a government then obviously you don’t need funding from that go~xxnmcnt,” said Jcn MacFarlanc, a third-year Chemistry student. “A lob by group would be a far better approach.”

Calgary Varsity, Carrol Jaques, agreed with MacFarlane. “I don’t think it would have a very serious impact,” said Jaques. SC1 think ifstudents want to send a message, they should be working very hard for opposition candidates.”

Despite criticisms, Benediktsson defends the plan as an innovativeapproach to raising the issueofpost-secondary education. ‘54s far as I know, this has never been done before, at least not in Canada,“he said, adding that running a candidate is less expensive than past SU-funded information campaigns, because media coverage for campaigns is often free. Any money spent on the campaign would be raised through fundraising, rather than using SW furIds. If the students surveyed on December 4 choose to proceed, the details of the campaign will be determined and then confirmed with the Universities of Alberta and Lethbridge. The U of A has already voted in favour of running their SU president as a candidate. The question goes to U of L students on November 28. In a recent survey conducted by the G~ntlct, the University of Calgary student newspaper, most students agreed to try something dif%iercnt. Of the 100 students asked “Do you think the SU should run a candidate in the next provincial election?” 47 said yes, 32 said no, and 2 1 were undecided. Comments ranged from, Yes, definitely, students are a portion of the population and deserve to be represented,” to “‘rhis is the stupidest waste of money I’ve ever seen.”

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6

NEWS

Mathies The vote for fee increase S M

IMPRINT,

Friday,

November

29, 1996

last picture show

Waterloo Theatre closes its doors to make way for Cambridge Multiplex by Sandy Atwal Imprint staff

I)

by Peter Lenardon Imprint staff

ath students have voted 166 to 105 in favour of increasing .the Mathematics Society fee from $7.50 to $10.50, with 11.7per cent of math students participating. The purpose of the increase is to provide additional funding for mathNEWS, the mathematics faculty newsletter. Another referendum will be held during the Winter 1997 term to ascertain the will of students currently on work term. The question read, “Yes, I’m in favour of adding $3.00 to the MathSoc fee on the fee statements of all Math students for the sole purpose of fLnding mathNEWS effective starting in the Spring 1997 term.” mathNEWS already receives $1 SO out of every MathSoc fee, but should the vote have the same result in the winter term, that figure wiil rise to $3.00. The stated reason for the increase is to cover the increasing costs of photocopying.

tudents will soon have another reason to patronize the Princess Theatre in uptown Waterloo by early next year, it will be the only game in After nearly sixty vears as the only first run movie house in Waterloo, thk Waterloo Theatre is closing its doors. Cineplex Odeon’s decision not to renew the lease of the theatre is based both on the theatre’s “poor perfbrmance” and the opening of a seven-screen multiplex in Cambridge. The cvcntual vacancy leaves some possibilites open for John Tutt, who owns the Princess Theater. would be a nice theatre for us to be in,” admits Tutt, who leases the space for the Princess from the neighbouring Huether Hotel. Tutt sees the inability of the Waterloo Theatre to “peTform” as primarily a programming problem. “All the programming was-done in Toronto and they never really made an attempt to program the cinema consistently.” Cineplex Odeon currently runs 127 theaters in Canada, but only three of them are single screens, including the Hyland Theater on Ontario street in Kitchener. The lease for the Hyland Theatre was recently renewed for another five years. The Cambridge multiplex theatre opens on Dec. ..,and the theatre has no lease. 13, while the Waterloo Theatre may close as early as January 30.

town+ “It

WANTED2

he holiday season for many of us is a time to sit back and reflect on what we have and how lucky we are. I know that in my own case, I cherish this time of the year because it is spent with all of the people that I love. I am reminded at this time of the year about the supportive network of family and friends that I have in my life. Unfortunately for others, the holiday season is a time ofsadness asthis time ofthe year marks an increase of accidents resulting in death - accidents too often caused by alcohol misuse or abuse. This term the Feds went to many lengths to put in place a BACCHUS (Boosting Alcohol Consciousness Concerning the Health of University Students) coordinator. It seemed that no one was interested in tackling this service which is dedicated to promoting safe and healthy drinking habits along with promoting the philosophy that you don’t have to drink to have a good time. Knowing that the issues surrounding alcohol abuse have come no closer to diminishing, it truly saddened me to think that we could not find a coordinator for BACCHUS this term. 1 discussed my concern with the Student Council and it was decided that myself and Heather Calder (Student Issue Resource Centre Coordinator) would tackle

T

Village

One.

Application Deadline: JANUARY 31, 1997

by Peter Lenardcm

Alcohol Awareness by Julie Primeau VP Internal Federation of Students

1998 term. Applications can be obtained from the Housing Office,

photo

the issue ourselves by joining forces with the WLU BACCHUS especially during the holiday season, Together with WLU we have accumulated material and i&ormation about alcohol and the issues that surround its misuse. This information will be made available to all students through the Fed off& or at the awareness booth that will be set up in the SLC. We are also promoting a really neat contest put out by the Brewers Association of Canada entitled “Give Us Your Word.” The purpose of the contest as outlined in the brochure is “to get as many messages out there on responsible use of alcohol, in as many ways as possible.” Students are encouraged to submit short stories, videos, music, poetry or artwork to the contest and in return are eligible for some fantastic prizes. For more information pick up a pamphlet in the Fed office or in many of our other Fed businesses. I had planned to write about the issues surrounding alcohol misuse this week, long before I learned about the accident involviiilg a University of Waterloo student who fell from his balcony on Sunday evening. The Federation of Students would like to extend their deepest sympathies to the friends and ftily of Matt Main. It seems already that there are as many people who have been profoundly impacted by his untimely death as there exists those people who knew him and were affected by him in his life.


IMPRINT,

Friday, November

Hey Imprint News 1

Students discuss fair enterprise by Jeff Wood special to Imprint n November 15 and 16, approximately 100 uni versity and college students converged on the Sutton Place Hotel in downtown Toronto for “Our Country, Our Future,” the first in a series of National Symposiums for Canadian Students sponsored by the Fair Enterprise Institute. The purpose ofthe symposium was to bring togethei students from across the country to listen to a number of guest speakers, learn about the principles encompassed by the Fair Enterprise philosophy, and in general have a whale of a good time. By all accounts, the symposium succeeded admirably on ati counts. Most of the students who Were invited to the symposium had submitted papers to the Magna fi)r Canada Scholarship Fund competition, with the occasional representative from universiw or student political organizatidns rounding out the group. For those who are unfmiliar with the Scholarship Fund, it is an annual essay competition in which students are invited to submit their ideas on what they would do if they were Prime Minister to imp&e living standards in Canada and increase unity. The Scholarship Fund is administered jointly by Magna International Inc, (an international automotive parts company based in Markham, Ontario) and the Fair Enterprise Institute (a not-for-profit public policy organization founded by Magna founder and Chairman Frank Stronach). Check-in for the symposium was on Friday afternoon, and after getting settled we all met at a reception at 690 p.m. From there, the attendees continued to socialize over a sit-down dinner which began at 7: 15 p.m. After dinner, Frank Stronach gave a Keynote address, in which he welcomed the participants, explaincd why we had been brought together for the weekend, and challenged us to share ideas and strategies for improving the I% ture ofour country. Mr. Stronach gave way to the evening’s entertainment, which took the form of the Montreal comedy duo Bowser & Blue, who served up their unique brand of politically and

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29, 1996

socially-based humour. Finally, the festivities moved to a neardy hospitality suite where an open bar, tasvM hors d’oeuvres, and live music provided a great opportunity for socializing, kibitzing, and even a little schmoozing. After a great breakfast at the Hotel’s 33rd floor restaurant ovcrlooking downtown Toronto, the real work of the Symposium started Saturday morning at 8:30 a.m. Colleen Walsh, Magna International Inc.? Director ofPublit Relations (who some of you might recognize from her stint as news reporter on the Global News team a while back) opened the session by welcoming the attendees and in traducing To ronto radio personality John Oakley, who acted as the ssmpos ium’s Chair of Proceedingi, The first session of the morning took the form of a clip from a soon-tobe-released television series entitled Days of R&on&~, in which young people from across the country t-ook an in-depth look at the problems facing Canadian society by tracking down politicians, academics, bureaucrats, and others who had been involved in making some of the contentious decisions in recent Canadian political history. The series, produccd by the Breakout Ed&ational N&work, is in final production as we speak, and should be aired sometime in the new year. From the brief look we got, it should be quite interesting. Presenters Frank Vasilkioti, founder and President of Aegis Corporate Financial Services Ltd., and PhilipO’Brien, Chairman and CEO of Devencore Ltd. and keg organizer of last year’s Unity Rally in Montreal, followed with a dis-

- readersae’

After you’re finished perusing thexvents of the

cussion entitled “State of the Nation: An Overview of Canada’s Political and Economic Conditions.” Mr. Vasilkioti taked about how Canada has been shaped by its political and economic history, and the need to develop unifying goals to keep the country from falling apart. Mr. O’Brien followed with a focus on manv of the positive aspects that Canida has working for it. He pointed to our expertise in the process of democracy (which he suggests that we could ‘market’ and ‘sell’ to the many developing nations around rhe world), the freedom rhat our citizens have to move around the country and the i+rorld (which makes Canada an ideal home base for the highly skilled, knowledgebased workers of the titure), our increasing productivity, and our potential for the development of a government structure that will help set our path into the next millennium. The next presentation, entitled “Fair Enterprise: In Pursuit of Economic Freedom,” was given by Frank Stronach, founder and Chairman ofMagna International Inc. and founder of the Fair Enterprise Institute. Mr. Szronach gave an ins&h&l view of some basic economic systems, as well as explaining his proposal for a new ‘Fair Enterprise’ model which could add&s some of the kev concerns tibout Canada< economy. A successful businessman, Mr. Stronach included some fascinating anecdotes from his experiences in the world of busine’ss. He put forward his belief that economic factors should no longer be overlooked in favor of

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NEWS

IMPRINT,

Friday,

November

29, 1996

Symposium a success l

Prompt, Dependable, Courteous

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WITH HOSTLORNEELLIOTT SEAN CULLEN CORKY AND THE ]ulCE PIGS

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continued

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7

political concerns when it comes to making decisions that will affect Canada’s development. He also made the sobering observation that all the ‘very smart) investment money has already left Canada, the ‘smart’ money was about to go, and that Canada has between five and seven years to get its act together before it isovertaken and left behind in the developing global society. After a quick Q&A session and a break for coffee, JamesNicol, Chairman and CEO of TRIAM Automotive Inc., gave a presentation entitled “Economic Participation: Fair Enterprise at the Corporate Level” in which he outlined some of his experiences with corporations which had adopted some of the Fair Enterprise philosophies, Satya Poddar, a tax partner in the Toronto office of Ernst & Young and one of Canada’s leading tax experts, then gave ,a presentation on Canada’s Tax structure, which included a very persuasive argument for the abolition of income taxes and a shift towards consumption taxes. A somewhat lively Q&A session followed these presentations, and everyone took a break for lunch, The afternoon presentations took on more of a political bent. The first, “The Nation’s Boardroom: The Root Cause of Canadian Cvnicism Towards Government/was given by Dennis Mills, long-time Liberal M.P. for Toronto riding ofBroadview-Greenwood and former senior Policy Advisor to the Cabinet Committee on Communications for former Prime Minister Pierre Trudeau. Mr. Mills gave the parcicipants a look at the inner workings of the federal government, and urged everyone to seriously

consider becoming involved in the political process and perhaps even run for office. Mr. Mills was followed by Patrick Boyer, President of the Breakout Educational Network and the Couchiching Institute on Public Affairs as well as former M.P. for the riding of Etobicoke-Lakeshore. His presentation UDemocratic Participation: The Chamber of Citizen

lenged all Canadians to take part in a ‘revolution of the mind’ which could lead Canada boldly into the future. He restated his belief that we do not have a lot of time to accomplish what it is we need to do, and that everyone needs to make an effort to become educated and take part in the discussions that will shape our country. Judging by the interest shown by

Frank Stronach gave an address in which he challenged all Canadians to take part in a ‘revolution of the mind’ which could lead Canada boldly into the future. Representatives ” stated that the political process in Canada is flawed because it does not allow for enough public input. Mr. Bover dutlined a possible solution to this problem, supported by the Fair Enterprise philosophy. This would be the inclusion of a Chamber of Citizen Representatives in the House of Commons which would be made up of non-partisan citizens elected by the public. Those elected would vote in secret in all HOuse votes and dilute the forces of partisanship policy-making in Canada’s federal government. This was followed by more questions, some of which focused on earlier presentations. Finally, Frank Stronach gave a closing address in which he chal-

the participants as they headed back to their communities, we all came away with a lot to think about, and a greater understanding of both the problems that face us as well as the potential within ourselves to successfully meet and overcome them. I hope that the Fair Enterprise Institute continues to hold these symposiums in the future, so that more young people can learn about anh contribute to the social reforms that are becoming increasingly necessary for our future wellbeing, both as a society and as individuals. Special Note: For more information about the Magna fot Canada Scholarship Fund, check out the link at the bottom of Magna’s homepage (www .magnaint corn).

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by Andrew Kennedy special to Imprint reviously in this column we mentioned something P called the Watpub but didn’t give out the phone numbers where you could get more information about these weekly events. Well, here they are for each city. Toronto 416-591-1650 Ottawa 613-526-7775 Calgary 403-284-8214 Co-ordinators are also required for these positions. They will be responsible for selecting the location for each week’s Watpub. This information must then be made available on the answering service at the local phone number. The co-ordinator also attends each Watpub and

should ideally have the location for the following week already selected. This information can then be distributed to those in attendance. Watpubs may also include special deals for UW students if the establishment is willTf you are ing to participate. interested in these positions, please contact Kelly Folley, Vice President Education with the Fedcration of Students. Last week, SAC was advertising for the position of chair for the winter and summer terms. We are still seeking more applicants. If you are interested in this position for either term, please send e-mail stating your interest to Chris Law at claw@novice .uwaterloo.ca. Many of the upper year students will be familiar with something called the Wear CO-op” box. This is a box which is located

on the SAC board in Needles Hall. Comments, complaints and other feedback for SAC and Coop can be written on a piece of paper and deposited into this box. Please outline the nature of your situation as completely as possible. Watch for its return in January* Best of luck to everyone on their final exams and best wishes for those of you who are going out on workterms. For those of you returning in January, have a good break and best wishes for co-op during the winter. Feedback and comments can be sent to sacaundergrad .math.uwaterloo.ca or posted to uw.coop.sac. Students Advising Coop has finished meeting for the Fall 1996 term but will again meet every Tuesday at 5 : 30pm in Needles Hall 1030 starting January 7, 1997.


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A Cornucopia Cornucopias

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The forum pages allow membersof the University of Waterloo community to present their views on various issues through letters to the editor and longer comment pieces, The opinions expressed in columns, comment pieces, letters and other articles are strictly those of the authors, not of Imprint. Imprint is an editorially independent newspaper published by Imprint Publications, Waterloo, a corporation without share capital, Imprint, Student Life Ccntre, Room 1116, University of Waterloo, Waterloo, Ontario, N2L 3G 1.

t is truly a sad and stupid world we live in. American carriers in the Persian Gulf could easily launch an attack and, with reinforcements, kill everyone in Zaire in a matter of weeks if not days. On the other hand, food seems to take months to trickle into the hands of the hungry. Death is so much easier to deliver than assistance. This is not to say that no attempt to help the people of Zaire isn’t being made. Last week, 10,000 delegates from around the world descended on Rome to ostensibly help the 840 million people who sufCer from undernourishment. U.N, Secretary General Boutros Boutros-Gh;ali addressed the crowd, and in his speech informed the crowd that 200 million children under the age of eight are undernourished and that every eight seconds, a child under the age of five dies because of malnutrition. The UN.% goal is to halfthe total number ofhungry to about 400 million in 20 years. l3ut is there a food crisis in the world? Are all the Malthusian projections of world population outstripping food production true? Well, no. The prophecies of doom are no more true now than in the early seventies when similar projections were made. (Those predictions were conveniently forgotten when they were eventually proven to be completely wrong.) The last time food production and population were approximately even was in 195 1. Since then, food production has grown at a rate greater than that of the world’s population such that if we assign an equal value of 100 to both food production and population in I95 1, the world population is now at 225 while food production hovers near 325 (all lies, damned lies and statistics courtesy of 7%~

I

Econwzist.

)

People continue to starve not because there isn’t enough food, but rather odious governments continue to pour resources into weaponry and ethnic wars rather than feeding their own people. Fortunately, food production continues to increase, so there is the hope that when warring tribes finally manage to stop killing each other and put their minds to more productive ends like saving each other, the food will be there. Squeezing more out of existing lands is one option, India feeds twice as many people as Africa. on 13% of the land area even though growing conditions are roughly comparable. In Asia, cro1 yields are only 40% of what scientists have beer able to achieve using technology now available. Ir India, scientists have managed to increase some crop yields by six times by planting both chickpe; and sorghum rather than just one crop. Meanwhile, advancements in biotechnolog) (predictably feared by luddites everywhere whc can’t get their minds around what we call “sci, ence”) have similarly helped improve food sup plies. Of course, most research in biotechnology, a! The Economist notes, is centred on medical advance merits, not crop yields, but the promise of bette: crops is already a reality and will only improve. This information is not meant to supply some sort of happy face to the thousands of people whc die of starvation every year - but it is meant tc. provide hope. While the sad and stupid world continues tc spin and people kill each other for any number o meaningless religious and political reasons, it be, comes apparent that ‘improvements in agriculturr are already under way and can help these individu als. But such help can only be delivered if the triba insanity of the third world is curbed - a mucf more difficult accomplishment than simply grow ing better crops.

The Uni~ersitv of Waterloo Student Newspaper Friday

November

Student Uk Centre, Room University of Waterloo Waterloo, Ontario N2L 3Gl

Editorial Editor in Chief Assistant Editor Forum Editor News Editor News Assistant Arts Editor Arts Assistant Sports Editor Sports Assistant Features Editor Science Editor Photo

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29,1996

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20

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Contribution

List

Mike Domaratzki, Matt Feldmaq Kelly Foley, Andy Kaczynski, Andrew Kennedy, Patrick Lindsay, Kelly McMaster, Melissa MacDonald, Adam Natran, Scott Preston, Julie Primeau, Mark Rankin, Tara Schagena, Cliff Snyder, Niels Tensen, Jeff Wood, Parking Lot Is Full, WPIRG Imprint is the official student newspaper of the University of Waterloo. It is an editorially independent newspaper published by Imprint Publications, I Waterloo, a corporation without share capital .Imprint is a member of the Ontario Community Newspaper Association (OCNA). Imprint is published every Friday during fall and winter terms, and every second Friday during the spring term. Imprint reserves the right to screen, edit, and refuse advertising. Imprint I ISSN 07067380. Mail should be addressed to Imprint, Student Life Centre, Room 1 I 16, University I of Waterloo, Ontario, N2L 3Gl.


Imprint welcomes letters to the editor from students and all members of the community. Letters should be 500 words or less, typed and double-spaced or in electronic form, and have the author’s name, signature, address and phone number for verification. Letters received via electronic mail must be verified with a signature. All material is subject to editing for brevity and clarity. The editor reserves the right to refuse to publish letters or articles which are judged to be libellous or discriminatory on the basis of gender, race, religion or sexual orientation. Opinions expressed are those of the individuals and not of Imprint.

Romeo Juliet

and #l

To the Editor, Throughout

my four year university has at various times proved interesting and informative, but until now had never shown itselfcapable of such atrocious journalism. The article to which I refer is the review of UW Drama’s production of Romeo and Juliet, written (and I use that term loosely) by Patrick Wilkins. There is not an actor on the planet who expects all reviewers to like all productions all the time; that would be absurd. There are, however, certain minimum standards ofjournalism that must be met, and Wilkins fails as dismally as he suggests the production did. Wilkins, whose lack of theatre criticism training is glaring, makes at least two blatant factual errors in his review. He complains: “As the heroine, Krista Pa& Little is cute, but in a fourteen year old little girl way. . .” Wilkins, who has clearly never read Romeo and Juliet, fails to point out that Shakespeare himself, through the mouths of both the nurse and Old Capulet, refer to Juliet’s age as being that of barely fourteen years. W&in’s also failed to pay any attention to his program ashe wrote his review, for if he had he might have noticed that the role ofhrlercutio was in fact played by the talented Calvin Sweers. Wilkins would be well advised to actually pay attention to the play; perhaps he might notice more than just whether or not Juliet is beautiful or merely cute. I may continue to read the Imprint, but only when the facts are unimportant. axer

the

Imprint

Romeo Juliet

and #2

out to lunch is the fact that the character Mercutio was indeed played extremely well but the actor’s name is Calvin Sweers, not Den-r&us Blakemore. The least you could do, Patrick, is read the program that they give out at the beginning of the play to get some of your names right. Finally, in this age of government cutbacks to post-secondary education, it was completeiy inappropriate, if not totally irresponsible, for Wilkins to take a jab at extra-curricular budget constraints, regardless of his point of view. I hope that if Wilkins wants to pursue a career in journalism, he learns to research his topics a little better than he did on this one. Sincerely, - Peter S. Sweeney 4A lwiticaz see&we

Romeo Juliet

and #3

To the Editor, This letter is in regards to the review bv Patrick Wilkins of Romeo and Juliet ai printed in the Imprint on November 22, 1996. Didn’t your mother ever tell you if you can’t say anything nice don’t say anything at all? I understand that a review is a personal critique of your interpretation of the play you see, but really, did you have to be so harsh? I have never attended any of the productions at UW and I was reall) looking forward to seeing Romeo and Juliet, and thanks to you, all I will do is compare what I see to what you wrote. Do you have a personal 1rendetta towards this production, because that is what comes across?No one deserves to be singled out and destroyed especially on the front cover? All I can really say is that the whole tone of the review disappoints me, and I really think the Imprint should learn some tact.

comments about the appearance of herself as a person, huh? I bet you’re no prize pig yourself.. Patrick Wilkins, or should I call you “Male Adonis?” You can comment on her acting ability and whether or not it was good, but when you cross the line and make pemm2 comments about the actor’s looks, you make the assumption that your shallow views are that of everyone else. Didn’t anyone ever inform you that there aren’t “ugly people or “beautiful” people, it all lies in the eye of the beholder. I can see that the Imprint staff will have to change this letter to Braille for you since your eyes seem to be failing. Grow up Patrick, and at least pretend to be a real reviewer. Secondly, was the memorable Demetreus Blakemore/Calvin Sweers switch. Good gravy man, their names are nowhere near each other in the progamme (yet more evidence that his eyes aren’t the best. Hmm, I wonder if he could even see the stage). You finally decide to write something nice about an actor, and what do you do, you slander him by not even getting his name right. How lovely, and I thought Christmas only came once a year. I didn’t think that someone’s foot would stretch all the way down to their lower intestine after being inserted into their gaping maw, but con&rats, Wilrick Patkins, I bet if you asked real nice Jim Rose’s Sideshow Circus would love to have you aboard. My review of Patrick Wilkins’ attempt

by

Pete

Nesbitt

at being a reviewer; A few good lines like the one at the end; “Photo by Charmion Zoll,” but obscene amounts of amateurish drivel. Save your eyes and look into a solar eclipse instead. Guess what, Pat, this was a frosh who wrote this letter about you, how utterly humiliating, tsk tsk. I could have done a serious review; a mature one to show you what one should look like. But I preferred to let you seewhat it feels like when people make unsolicited personal attacks.

Romeo Juliet

and #5

To the Editor, It is one of the unwritten rules of the theatre that the artists involved should swallow negative criticism and not answer back. However, because your reviewer, Patrick Wilkins, is new to the game of writing critical reviews, I think it is important to make the point that there is a difference between making valid, hard-hitting points and indulging in what amounts to gratuitous insults. Indeed, his review of l

and

Pat

continued

to page

Spacek

To the Editor, I was dismaved earlier todav when I picked up this wick’s copy of &print to discover that you actually have morons on staff, I too attended UW’s production of Romeo & Juliet, and I think that Patrick Wilkins should consider taking English 190 to brush up on his Shakespeare or he should learn to be a better critic. First of all, nowhere to my knowledge was this production deemed to be a “modern adaptation” as Wilkins seems to think. Actually, I felt that the non-specific setting and music was an ingenious way of allowing the audience to concentrate on the story rather than trying to determine its specific locale. While quite accurate in his assessment of Romeo, Wilkins is totally misguided in his view of Juliet. This is where English 190 would come in handy, Patrick; Juliet is a 14-year-old. She is supposed to be an irrnocent, misguided, cute kid; not some 21year-old sexpot. The whole irony of the play is the fact that these two kids don’t have a clue what real love is and the tragedy is that they take their lives for it. Also proving that Wilkins is completely

Romeo Juliet.

and #4

To the Editor, I must protest that Patrick Wilkins review of UW’s Romeo and Jz&et left me feeling very upset. I am not involved with the production, but I do feel that I am a good judge of acting and writing; and when it comes to whether or not I would prefer to read his review (which smacks of a sour personal vendetta against the department) or watch the play again, I would watch the play. I understand that he is entitled to his opinion, as am I, but the sloppy way in which he attacked this review . is a disgrace. First off is his description of Juliet; “Shakespeare’s Juliet must be the perfect woman...and, above all else stunningly beautiful (how else to explain love at first sight?).” UW Drama Department’s Juliet is not” Who the hell are you, a beauty consultant? How can you make personal

Not

nearly Jon went

as stupid

as is commonly

on vacation

and forgot

believed,

Odie

made

do when

to leave his pets any food.

12


FORUM

RESEARCH Student Ext. ewpirg@wotsarvl chttp://watsarvl

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Friday,

November

29, 1996

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Don’t buy the hype Last week the members from WPIRG’s Propaganda Watch working group reported on BUY NOTHING DAY. Fortunately, this day is not just a Waterloo thing or a WPIRG thing. Activists in the U.S. want over-consumption to be on people’s minds for at least one day and have produced commercials. These 30 second spots don’t sell products, but highlight the effects of over-consumption. For example, a plasticine model ofNorth America comes alive as a pig with a voice-over about our culture. Unfommatclp, TV networks refuse to run the Buy Nothing Day ads, so Sandy Atwal is not alone in his attacks. A press release from Adbusters recently reported that the NBC, ABC and CBS television networks have refused to run a Buy Nothing Day campaign spot produced by the Media Foundation. In refusing to sell airtime for the 3Osecond ad, Richard Gitter, Vice Presiilent of Advertising Standards at NBC said: “We don’t want the business. We don’t want: co accept any advertising that’s inimitable to our legitimate business interests.” Harvey Dzodin, Vice President of Commercial Clearance at ABC said: ccl~comotion of this event would be in violation of our policy on advertising of controversial issues.” “We’re contemplating First Amendmerit legal action,” saysKalle Lasn, President of the Media Foundation. “These are public airwaves. The networks should not be censoring messages like this.” Lucki 1y, Sandy Atwal (editor off mprint) supports free speech and the need for a public forum for discussion. Imprint ran the BUY NOTHING DAY story but Sandy called it a “senseless, futile, pointless and downright flaky idea that Adbusters and their communist cohorts have come up with.” Held on the first shopping day after U.S. Thanksgiving (Nov. 29), Buy Nothing Day (now in its fti year and celebrated in eight countries) invites the people of the afIIuent West to join a 24hour moratorium on consumer spending. It seems that freedom of the press belongs to those who own one, and a cornrnercial broadcast system is incapable of dissenting on such an important social and environmental issue. Without television selling millions of consumers to advertisers, what’s the point? The point for members of Propaganda Watch and BUY NOTHING DAY is to “sell” a different kind of message. Joe D ominguez and Vicki Robin report on consumer culture in their book “Yotir Mmwy w Tow Lt$.” Here are some of the numbers: l The percentage of college freshmen who thought it essential to be well off fmancially was 44 percent in 1967 and 76percent in 1987. Incontrast, in 1967, 83 percent of college freshmen thought it essential to develop a philosophy of *.

life while in 1987, only 39 percent did. l The average American spends one entire year of his or her life watching TV commercials. l Americans spend an average of six hours a week shopping and 40 minutes playing with their children. More statistics to make you think, from E Migazine. (Please note: Canadians are not much

different

from Ameti-

cans at the cash registar,) l The percentage of Americans who ’ agree with the statement, “We buy and consume far more than we need”: 82 l U.S. advertising expenditure per capita (U.S. $) in 1950: 198; in 1989: 498 l Percent of the world population living in industrialized countries : 20; Percent of the world’s timber and energy consumed by that 20 percent: 75; Percent of the world’s radioactive wastes and chloroflurocarbons generated by that 20 percent: 90 BUY NOTHING DAY isn’t about “socialism” or “evil empires” as last week’s article was headlined by Irnprint staff. There’s nothing “senseless” about raising awareness on consumerism, only those who try to attack its promoters and censor the facts. Unfortunately, the media focuses on events and not processes, so consider your participation in BUY NOTHING DAY as part of the solution against consumer culture. WPIRG is holding a spoof ad contest. A what? Spoof ads are ads that parody real ads. They look like real ads, but their message is always diffcrcnt, usually the absurdity of the original see below. Spoof ads use the tool of advertising to subvert market researchers and empower people _for deconstructing commercial messages and constructing their own. Here’s your chance for all you creative, literate, critics of consumer culture, and wise-asses. You can drop off the ad at the WPIRG offke and receive a free T-shirt. Together with WPIRG you can get rhe spoof ad published in A&SJP~S, or maybe your very own student newspaper.

l

continued

from

page

I1

Ro;wteoand Jtilie~ was so vicious that I wondered whether thert: was some sort of personal agenda behind some of the remarks. It was either that or ignorance. Neither should be part of a reviewer’s equipment. The very first sentence gives it all away, “Two kids sucking face for five minutes.” To start the piay off with a kiss is not inappropriate for Rumt~ and Juht. The kisslasted for something like 20 seconds. It is important when writing critical reviews to beware of silly exaggerations. Even ifwe had had all the money in the world, we would not have used period costumes. It always surprises me to learn that people are not yet used co “modernized” Shakespeare. Presumably this is a reaction of those who are not very experienced theatre-goers, and don’t know that modern dress is very common for all Shakespeare’s plays. Wilkins states that Shakespeare’s Juliet is, amongst other things, “verbose” and Lccunning.” These are strange adjectives to use, and hardly give an accurate impression of this chara&. Maybe he is conf&ing her with Cleopatra or -Lady Macbeth. Your critic also objects to the character being portrayed as a “M-year-old little girl;” a remark that ieaves me breathless with amazement. Of course that is exactly what she is supposed to be! Except that she is 13 not 14. He also doesn’t like it when her youth leads her to “flip-flop” between adoration and pathos. Actually, Juliet “flip flops” through many more emotions than these, but after such remarks I really have to wonder whether Wilkins understands this character at all. As for the suggestion thar only if JuLiet is “stunningly beautifkl” can we believe in “love at first sight” we& I will leave that rather immature thought (not to mention the unnecessary and, in my opin-

ion, inaccurate slur tnat It mlpbes as regards Ms. Little) to others to judge. Wilkins appears to have two objections to our Benvolio: she is a woman and she is a flirt. Oh dear, oh dear! In reply I would say, first, that I do wish he had a more open mind about cross casting (what would he make of recent female Hamlets and Richard IIs, etc.?) and, second, that I wonder what exactly he’s referring to when he calls her a flirt. Yes, she is certainly a peace-keeper and level-headed (and Sharon Kelly played this) but this doesn’t preclude her from having ti and joking with Romeo as the text requires (as Ms. Kelly does j. To think otherwise is to think in cliches. Your reviewer has sad that the “script hacker” is unidentified. Let me hasten to let him know that I cut the play myself, and make no apologies for these cuts. No key scenes were lost as he seems to think, and the play comes in at two hours which is what I was aiming for. On this point, I do wish Wilkins had pointed his criticisms more directly and clearly at me rather than the actors who were doing what I asked of them: I could go on and mention other odd opinions and inaccuracies in the review, but there is not much point. However, I must make one final correction. The part of Mercutio was played by Calvin Sweers, not Demetreus Blakemore (who played Montague) as Wilkins seems to think. If a critic cannot take the trouble to get such basic facts right, why should we believe anything else he says? Yours sincerely, P.S. I assume that Wilkins will be disappointed to know that, in spite of his irresponsible attempt to keep people away, all nine performances of Romeo andJdiet were sold out or very nearly so.


IMPRINT,

Friday,

November

Penultimate Wubnig To the E&or,

I had a few thoughts about Judy Wubnig’s ictter. IIerc goes: 1) Judy’s comment on financing is that customers (students) do not have a say in how ELcompany (UVV) runs things. I’ll agree with that only on face value. Any company must be able co sarisQ its customers’ &eds and wants. If the customer base wants control of how their money is spent, then the companjr has two choices: The company can cithkr provide a means to satisfy their customers; or the company can try to show their customers why their demand is unreasonable. Ifthe company fails to placate the customers, they will find their business suffi~s. Either way, the company (and its employees) must constructively deal with the issuk the customers have-raised. Calling the customers “ignorant” is probably not the best way to go about this. 2) Judy’s final point is that students have only a responsibility to themselves. I’ll agree with this wholeheartedly. As a completely selfish student, when I graduate I’ll want it to be from a university that it is regarded as one ofthe best, if not the best in the country. My self-serving interest also ensures that I want to make sure that the education I receive while I’m here is the best my money can buy. Therefore, issues surrounding the teaching staff are important to the students. Students, then, obviously have a direct interest in tenure and promotion committees, Students may “have kxs experiencc about what goes on at a unive&ty” but as a collective, we have a great deal of knowledge about teachers and being taught. I believe that student representation on tenure and promotions comm itteos can only provide positive information to the Universitv about its customers’ needs and wants. I am a customq and although the university can ignore my desires, it is in the University’s best interest to make me want to spend another tu’o grand next term. The universi@s staff and faculty, asrepresentatives of the company that I am giving one third of ml? earnings to, should also act in the Unive&y’s best interest.

Last

Wubnig

To the Editur, Re: Power to the Students. students=no In short: no university= no professors =no Judy Wubnig. Plain and simple. Unfortunately her bigoted viewpoint has to complicate matters. - Ruse Ham’sun 3A Honuws Health Stttdies,!Ibesiuiu~y

To a true alternative

topics as homosexuality, the existence of God, or that amoral puppet, Mike Harris (a perverse example, by the way, of the meek inheriting the earth). Rather, my missive is directed at all those who complain about the arts section publishing reviews of bands they’ve never heard. Now, I can’t speak for the editors but I have two theories as to why this is so: 1) Why waste valuable space on reviewing bands that already clog every other medium (ie. TV, radio, newsprint)? 2) Your music SUCKS! Although it is not as good asit used to be, (seeHootie and the Blowfish review) Imprint remains one of the few publications anywhere that publishes well written, entertaining and informative reviews of bands outside the mainstream. It never ceasesto amaze me why these bands don’t receive the notoriety they deserve. I can only conclude that the average consumer is lazy. No matter. But if my assumption is correct, and you are one of those lazy consumers who like being told what’s cool by a bunch of idiots at Much Music and lQ2.1 The Edge, that’s your problem. By all means, keep lapping up the crap spoon fed to you courtesy of major labels; but please, accept Imprint Arts for what it is. The last thing we need is for Imprint to be dumbed down to please the masses. Lovingly, - M&t Gailitis Pickering, Ontario

and the President of UW thought it was necessary to terminate the profs tenure, while the adjudicator felt counselling was appropriate? Doesn’t that discrepancy indicate that something might be wrong with the process? - Heather Culdev Cuurdifiatw, Student tm

Xssws Resuwce

2A

Asshole

drivers

This letter is for the two assholes who almost killed me this week. Twice in three days, as I have walked towards a campus parking lot, some idiot turning left has narrowly missed mangling me. I’d understand if I was crossing against an advanced green. If I do that go ahead and run me over; that would be my fault. But on both occasions I was crossing when the little white man said I could, Therefore, I had the right of way and you didn’t. I come from Toronto, moron driver central, so I’m well versed on pedestrian rights and shitty driving. So remember, jerks, to look for me next time you turn left, because not only will your insurance skyrocket if you hit me, but I’ll be sure to leave you with a great big mess.

James what

Russell says he wants

To the Editor,

I am writing to correct a misquotation in last week’s news item entitled “Report details ‘utterly necessary”‘. Mr. Krafchick quotes me as saying: “Everything we’ve seen at UW that has to do with sexual harass merit and termination of tenure has been unsatisfactory,” when in fact I told him that everything we’ve seen at UW that has to do with sexual harassment and termination of tenure has been unsatisfactorv to thecomplainants. The difference is slighr, but I think significant. If you never hear about a case in which a professor has been sanctioned for sexual harassment, are you going to be as likely to report a professor who is sexually harassing you? Most experts in the field say no, and we agree, Some of the people featured in the campus question said that the details of the report aren’t of any use to anybody, or are not our business. I would argue thar we need to know what happened. There is a big difference between a professor asking a student (or staff member) out on several different occasions, and a professor sexually assaulting a student (both of which can be considered sexual harassment). If this caseinvolved the former sort of behaviour, some times referred to asa “low-level” complaint, then the finding thaLtthe professor undergo counselling seems entirely appropriate. If the professor sexually assaulted one of the complainants, then I would be outraged at the suggestion that he should return to UW to teach.

Although 1seldom agree with the views presented in it, I always enjoy reading the 7Vho is John Gait?” column by James Russell, since it is very thought provoking. However, the column of November 15 seemed like nothing more than a justification for James to say anything he wants. Even though everyone should have the right to say anything they want, that does not mean that everything that everyone says is right. It is good to hear many viewpoints, and I know that my own beliefs have been strengthened by this, but I also think that wisdom should be used in deciding both the content and expression of communication with others.

don’t

feel that it’s neces-

to know who the professor was, or who the complainants are, but we do need information that explains the adjudicator’s decision. Doesn’t it strike you as strange that the Dean (of the profs department), the Vice President Academic and Provost,

- Wurmz H&J?

Rez Turner To the Edits, If L. Turner would like to view the German culture of the 1930s with admiration, then I would like to discuss the German culture of the 1930s and 40s in a different light. I will concede that Adolf Hitler accomtjlished some remarkable things with a Germany whose economy was almost destroyed by depression, and that he greatly improved the infrastructure of the country. Ifwe are only to consider how this man afkted

True

German

Citizens”

Cumlyn ti&wd Honours MYatbmtics

Adbusters buy nothing

To the Editor,

To the Editor,

We definitely

wards, without much in the way of investigation? Why were all other parties later declared illegal? If we want to discuss cultural values, perhaps you could explain the Leibensborn program late in the war, which encouraged polygamy and adultery. If you can explain away all this, I have more to discuss with vou.

Cm-

- Curul Szkttun Entirunmental Sttidies

Sexual harrasment unsatisfactory

sary

Having been a faithful reader of Imprint for four years now, I feel it’s time I commented on an issue that has, from time to time, cropped up in the letters section. No, it has nothing to do with such weighty

13

FORUM

29, 1996

(I

will

not mention German citizens his and his governments policies deemed unworthy, nor will I even begin to mention war crimes.), I have a few questions: Who started the Reichstag fire? Why was the Communist party declared illegal after-

Tu the

Editor,

Mmmmmm.. .Tripe . I read Tim Fleming’s “Corporate Talk” in the November 22, 1996 Imprint and got a strong taste of tripe in my mouth. Let’s start with his attackon the Weston grocery chain. First, he decries the fact that Weston-owned stores carry a wide selection of what are mainly Weston-produced products. He considers the fact that they are sold under tierent brand names to be a coverup of some sort. Could it not be the fact that the products themselves are different, and that different labelling makes them distinguishable to customers ? And are Weston stores supposed to carry competitors’ products ? Is McDonald’s supposed to offer us Whoppers alongside its Big Mats ? The point that Weston has revenues exceeding that of some .provinces is irrelevant. People freely paid for Weston products which theyI wanted; the money was not extorted through taxation. In stating rhat Weston feigns corn ye ti tion by operating grocery stores under different names, Mr. Fleming left out the fact that the A&P chain operates in almost every market that Weston does, and rhat vou won’t find two Weston-owned stores in the same area pointlessly fighting each other. You won’t find a iouaws where there is a Zehrs, but \I’OU d will find a competing SuperFresh. Mr. Fleming implies that corporate decision-makers have too much power over society. But in reality, how much power do the CEO’s of GM, Microsoft, or Jim’s Bait and Tackle have over us? If they annoy the public, they will lose business, which is not good for their employment prospects. A politician, on the other hand, has plenty of power (excessive, I believe) over you ti m individual, and has little to lose for wrong-

ingyou.

I agree with Mr. Fleming that any organization that assists oppressive governments, like Shell oil in Nigeria, should be chastised. But through his use of broad generalizations, he portrays all large corporations as being just as malevolent as Shell. Weston’s large stake in the grocery business is not unjust, and it cannot be compared in any way to the support of an authoritarian regime. As for Buy Nothing Day, a celebration of people’s “independence from corporations,” I invite anyone who takes this communist love-in seriously to read Adam Smith’s WEaM of Nations, which explains that no man is an island, and that one must freeiv trade with others to survive and prosper. Ignore

the

socialist

Buy

Nothing

Day

and be happy that we still have some semblance of a free market with free choice in this colJntry.


FORUM

IMPRINT,

Friday, November

29, 1996

By Kelly Foley, Vice President Educarion The views in this column don’t necessarily represent you or me. If you agree or disagree with the views expressed here then let me know. Speak for yourscU! kcfoley@feds.watstar.uwatcrloo.ca or ext. 2340

I am about to commit blasphemy against a long standing Federation of Students poliq. This is the Forum section, after all. I have been picking on govemment on both the federal and provincial level, so why not criticize oneself? This week’s victim is the Income-Contingent Loans Repayments (ICLR) . ICLK is a proposed scheme under which a person wouid repay their student loans accbrding to their income &er graduation. Through our membership with the Ontario Undergraduate Student Alliance (OLGA), the Federation of Students has always supported ICLRs. Our romance withincox&contingency began in the first htiof the ’90s with the introduction of the OUSA paper, “Students for Change.” In “Stidents for Change”OUSAnoted that tuition comprised 10% of university operating budgeis* The paper proposeh that if tuition rose to 35% of the operating budget and was accompanied by similar injection to fimding from the government and private sector, university quality would be significantly enhanced. In order to help students manage the higher tuition level OUSA proposed that the government adopt an ICLR. It’s interesting to note that, since the release of “Students for Change” in 1992, hlition has increased to 35%. Neither the government nor the private sector has increased its share of fLndincr. Additionallv, we have no ICLR, nor >ny substan& student aid reform. While “Students for Change” advocated an admirable philosophy of partnership, it also displayed re-

markable naivetd, but hindsight . is 20120. I would argue we have no ICLR because there is no such thing as an ICLR eat actually works. Typically, criticism has been aimed at the link between ICLR and higher tuition. Alternately, doubters pointed to life-long debt accompanying ICLK. The former critique seems irrelevant now, as tuition went-up as quickly without an ICLR as it might have with one. The second point holds a bit more water. The counter argument is that a good ICLR would offer a cap. For example, the balance of a loan not repaid tier 20 years would be forgiven. This argument ighores one tidamentaf issue. The issue is interest. Interest is typitally compounded or recapitalized. If you were to delay payment of your loan you will accumulate more interest than vou would if you paid at a flat rate. To &&ate this, I point to a simplistic model. Person A borrows $12,000 under the current system. If Person A repays $4,800 per year, they will have repaid the loan in 7 years with interest payments totaling $9,310 (at 7S%/year). Person B also borrows $12,000 under an ICLR program. Person B’s income increases at a steady rate tier graduation, so they start payments at $2,000 a year which increase every year by $1,000 dollars. While it will only take Person B an additional year to repay the loan, they will pay $12,114 in interest. Although there are a number of flaws in the ICLR theories, the current program is actually worse. Do I have the solution? Nope. This is the Forum section, tier all.

1. The government shouldn’t give any money to Canadian Airlines to bail them out. Subsidies are bad enough, but %nancial relief” to postpone bankruptcy is lunacy. There is nothing to suggest Canadian is going to start making any money in the near future, so there is really no prospect of getting any of the money back. And to the unions who want $35 million so that their workers won’t have to take a pay cut, your greed is short-sighted and foolish. A temporary bailout will not preserve your jobs for long. If you accept a pay cut, the company can cut its operating costs and work towards some long term stability. Sure, if this money is granted, your pav cheques will be ai large asthey are now fo;a little longer, but you better enjoy them while they last. Soon they’ll be welfare cheques. 2. The public-sector unions in Quebec are probably going to go on strike to protest Bouchard’s attempts to balance the budget by 2000. Uh, are you stupid? In Quebec’s troubled economy, with that damned “money” (to go with the “ethnic vote”) going out a lot faster than it’s coming in, where do you think that cash to pay you is going to come from? I’ll tell you: nowhere. Take the pay cut and keep your jobs. 3. In Paris, truckers are striking for the

them, feel connected to them, or like to play them up. I’m just saying that these categories have become something of a joke, and I don’t want heterosexuals to think that we still date in such a rigid way. One anonymous friend of mine always asks me, “Who’s the man?” every time I get in a new relationship with a woman. That said, it must be admitted that the character Gorky epitomizes the hutch ideal, Susie Bright defines hutch as “sullen, sensitive, misunderstood, artistic, inarticulate, beau&l, defiant, tender, yearning.. . tough, muscled, obsessive, smoking and of course tragic.” This description explains why James Dean was once listed as a dyke icon in Dim magazine. (Yes, JamesDean! I wasshocked too!) Violet represents the feminine ideal, which does not need to be explained, as it is much more prevalent in mainstream culture. I was glad to see that Violet was not portrayed as some wimpy ditz. There is a tendency in lesbian culture to devalue femininity. It is seen astoo weak, too fluffy and not political enough. This is unfair. All in all, it was nice to see a movie where the lesbians are not psychotic killers (or are not any more violent than everyone else). When lesbians are not out seducing all the straight women in movies, they’re killing men. What’s so threatening about an autonomous woman? Watch “Sister, My Sister,” “1 Shot Andy Warhol,” “Basic htinct,” “Heavenly Creatures” or “Butterfly Kiss” for examples of this. Watch ccBound” for an example of the progress the straight media is making in representing lesbianism on screen.

TheMkhan 3 university rankings never fail to provoke reactions, which carry with them interesting justifications. This year was no exception. I read P&dent Downey’s statements about the Maclean’s rankings, and I was quite disappointed with one comment in particular: “If with increased class size we can achieve the greatest number of student awards, have high standardoffaculty awards and the highest quality graduates...is it [class size] a true indicator-no.” Waterloo had the worst ranking for class sizes among the 11 ‘“comprehensive” universities at both the first- and second-year level and the third- and fourth-year level. He doesn’t seem too concerned. In my opinion, Waterloo is succes&l ia spite of its large class sizes, not because they are not a valid indicator of the quality of education. The university is simply fortunate that it has been able to compensate in other areas. It’s a Little disconcerting to hear him pretend otherwise. The quality of education at Waterloo would clearly increase if class sizes decreased. Sure, the difference between a class size of 150 and 100 or even 50 is not that great as far as student-professor contact is concerned. However, the difference between 50 and 30 or less is very noticeable. Surely Waterloo could improve if it was able to rtiduce class sizes and thereby have more frequent contact between professors and students. Admittedly, in some courses, such as maths, sciencesand engineering, small class sizes may not be crucial; there may not be

Lots of tidbits:

right to retire early atfillpay. Hey, sounds fair to me. 4. The Auditor-General has reported that, due to problems getting important information fi-om judges and the police, many dangerous convicts are being released based on information that they provided themselves. Yes, parole boards are being forced to take the word of convicts because they have nothing else to go on. “‘Are you sorry?” “Yes .” “Are you going to do it again?” iWO.”

“Right. Off you go.” I don’t know about you, but I think something is seriously f&king wrong here. 5. Mike Tyson has become a literary critic. Responding to a question about his reading habits, Tyson responded, “When I was in prison, I was wrapped up in all those deep books. That Tolstoy crap. People shouldn’t read that stuff.” I’m not even going to touch that. As an English major, I can te1 when I’m out of my league. 6. Some hope (however slight) for all us soon-to- be graduates. In Italy, a 24 yearold man took his mother to court tier she kicked him out of the house and changed the locks. The court has ruled in his favour, forcing the mother to let him continue to live with her. I really don’t see why a similar case couldn’t occur here in Canada. Hi Mom.

‘hw* lwcltEsa& ~ldhts.drt I went to see the movie “Bound” last week and it inspired some fairly haphazard thoughts, so forgive me if 1:digress a bit in this column. I must admit that I was rather skeptical about the quality of a movie about lesbians that is produced by men. However, LLBound” was excellent. Finally, real lesbian issues on screen, not just some hot male fantasv! Issues like trust and mind games. As CZorky says in the movie, “If there’s one thing I hate about sleeping with women, it’s all the mind reading.” I doubt if there was a gay woman in the audience that this didn’t resonate for. For the most part, the movie felt like a fairly realistic depiction of lesbian relationships (okay, minus the guns and Mafia connections). This is due in part to the fact that Susie Bright a.k.a. Susie “Sexpert,” the lesbian sex guru, helped direct the sex scenes, and made a cameo appearance as well. If any aspect of the film struck me as untrue, it was the way they played up the hutch/femme thing. I don’t know any real butch/fernme couples. If these categories do exist, each tends to stick to their own. Certainly these kinds of relationships tiere commonplace during the Fifties, but the feminist movement of the Seventies discarded them asheterosexual culture’s sexist influence. Thus the ambiguous, androgynous

woman

became

the poiiticdy

axrat

statement. Of course some gay women are decidedly more “feminine” or amasc&ne” than others, but nothing is so strictly sexroled anymore. This is not to deny that hutch/femme roles are a part of our heritage, or that some women have reclaimed

much room for discussion of the material, But they still can’t hurt, and it is even more important in arts courses for people to express their opinions, or practice a language, or discuss whatever the circumstances dictate. Since the Arts faculty is the largest faculty (although not the most prominent one j, the administration ought to make small class sizes a priority, rather than just dismissing class size as a poor indicator of quality education. Speaking of quality, why is it that Waterloo has never held top spot in the “Highest Quality” category under the national reputational rankings (i.e., compared to all of the universities)? We consistently rank behind Queen’s and Toronto in this respect, despite having been the “Most Innovative” and the “Leaders of Tomorrow” for a number of years running. Tomorrow has come and gone a few times now, and I think being a leader ought to include having the highest quality education. Maybe it has to do with class sizes. Of course, Waterloo still did very well, whether judged by statistics or other aspects of our reputation. But universities live, die and get &ding by their reputation. If employers and graduate schools continue to think that Waterloo is not the highest quality institution, our innovation and expected leadership in the hture is only going to get those of us currently attending so far. There’s always room to improve. Reducing class sizes, as difficult as it is, should not be knocked off the priority list.


leasetdw the time to fill out this surve\r and drop it offat theImprint of5ce, Student Life Centre, Koom 1116. Ify& wish to add anytkrther comments, please attach a piece ofpaper to this form. People who4t-eturn their surveys by 4130 on December 6, 1996, will be eligible for wonderful prizes and stuE, including four $25 gift certificates from 1%. Disc, three $25 gift certikicates from the UW Bookstore and three snazzy Imprint Tm shirts. The drawing will take place promptly at noon on December 13. Winners will be notified by phone or e-mail, and announced along with the results of the survq~* in the first issue of the winter term.

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“Ecstzasy, speed

trips”

A three day journey to a land where morals are questioned by Tim Bondarenko Imprint staff

The The

vy tim.

hen we got there, there were these South Arncriuan Natives busking outside Ce?lD& S&They had guitars and they had a standup bass, as well ds a drum, and they were plavirlg their music h)r IIIOIIC*~. Each N;1tivc had on a red and white striped poncho, and most had lmg black hair. After watching ttxm play fix- hut d minute or so, the police LIIIIC Ad told them to disperse. The only picture I got of them i\ras when they were being asked to leave. 1 traveled to AmstcrcLlnl in the March of’ this year with my two buds, James md Drew. Neither of& had been there b&r-e, or e\‘en to Europe h>r- that matter. Sitting here now, thinking md writiflg about Amsterdam makes me loath this city and what it has to offer, coflIparcd to the centuries old ~lt?‘, with its canals and skinny tall buildings that make it one of the most unique city’s in the world. And ves, you can smoke marijuana and hash the& if you really want to. And yes, you can sleep with a pr&itutc there, again, if Vou really want to. r After we watched the Natives happily disband, we were approached bv at lc’ast four different people claiming to h&c rooms available for us to rent. Qne woman told us she owned a house boat (one ofsix hundred thousand in the Netherlands) and that she would give it to us for “really cheap.” We declined. The room we did get was at a place called E&c1 Tclmam, urldcrneath a bar named the Blarny Stone. Both the bar and hotel were run by an Irish C:ouPle, who had it decorated Lr the upcoming St. Patrick’s day celebration. Unf&tunatcly, we missed the P”rrY. The man who had greeted us at CEPZ~F-U~~Stutionwas named Andy. He told us he was fromMiami and that we shouldn’t buy anything from the b’uys on the street. “The shit they sell is usually rat poison,” Andy told us. “Won’t kill you, but it’ll make you really sick.” He stressed “really” by extending the sowId of the word, which made us take his dvicc cvcn more. But why would we buy something from the guys on the street when you codd buy the same stuff in the cafes? %)me people don’t know,” Andy said. ‘LSomc people come here and their first trip is a bad one on rat poison. ,4nd watch out for pick-pockets too.” After paying for the room, Andy asked us if we were going to engage in some kind of sexual relation with a prostitute. James said, speaking “Probably not,” on our behalf. “Well, if you do,” Andy said, “make sure to use a dome.” He left and WC were finally alone in a hotel room the size of a cube van, with the city of Amsterdam moving with domestic life all around us. It was two in the after-

noon. “Who’s

got papers?”

James

asked.

three of us laughed. first cofi&z shop we went to was called Dou& Q,~LK It was across the narrow street from our hotel. As James and 1 left, the owner was working the bar and he tolrl us as we opened the door not to buq’ anything from the guys on the street. Throughout our stay in Amstcrdarn, everyone we met told us not to buy stufr from the Moroccans. The Moroccans were usually skinner and tail mm, and they walked the stl’eets &groups of twos or threes, and they would walk beside you, brushing the sleeve‘ of!Tour coat, and say, “Ecstasy, speed trips.” On our way to 3 cotSx shop \ve speed trips.” When would hear, W~asy, we were walking to a restaurant we would hear, “Ecstasy, speed trips.” It seemed everywhcrc WC wcn t, these Moroccans would a~ppcar out of nowharc and of6cr us dope. Once, when we were walking to the Royal l’alace, a Moroccan approached us and brushed past James’ shoulder and said, “Ecstasy. . .coke.” The three of us ignored him, and when wc were just beyond each other, the Moroccan turned around and in a desperate s&s pitch uttered the word, “Hecesh!” hoping to catch our interest in some hash that he was potentially selling. The three ofus laughed and continued walking. A rather Publicized and commercial tourist attraction in Amsterdam is a sight seeing tour of”The ‘Dam” in a boat, through the canals that twist and turn their way d around the city. On one afternoon, James and I paid a low amount ofcash to take one of these tours and to our surprise it was quite enjoyable. It gave us a chance to see the entire city from the water, and view its architectural design from a difGrent perspective. As well, a briefhistorical synopsis is given about the city on the boat tour, which educated myself and James a Little on Amsterdam itself. l>own the hall from our room, two American girls had rented the only other room in the hotel that we were staying at. They told us they wcrc from either North or South Carolina, I think, and that they were on 3 four month tour of Europe. “VVe just got here fi>rm Italy three days ago,” the one told us when wo met. CLH3C~ you guys tried the space cakes yet?” Space cakes are brownies Gth hash baked into them. “No,” said James, &‘we haven’t.” Latter that evening, the two American girls and the tllree of us went to a cafe called T?!uDoors. The walls were decorated with pictures of the band, and other classic rock idols. I think 1 saw Hendrix somewhere in there as well as Joplin, but since it was extremely dark and smali, my eyes could have deceived me. I guess somewhere along the way to the’cafe, the LWO Americans thought that my friend James was going to sell them cocaine. Apparently (while I was zoned out watching Pink F&yd 4rt Pompii) the one American asktzd James if he had it with

him.

James,

not knowing what she was

talking about, happily told her he did. Then there was a brief discussion

be-

tween the two Americans and then the one asked Jzunes if she could see the cocaine. “Cocaine?” James said. “I’m not selling any cocaine.” After the five of us lefi 7%~ DOWS we went to another cafe called? ije &&..oplyer, where we proceeded to ditch the two cokeG~Lw/~o~P~~, the three ofus then went back to our room and crashed for the evening, trying despemtely to avoid at all costs the Americans who thought James ws a coc3inc dc;ller. Fortunatcl~, the morning after, the two Yanks were ~CJIIC, as will as their cocl&e fantasies. On our last night in Amsterdam, around three in the morning, after w;uldering the civ for liours looking for nothing in parricular, the three ofus went into a porno shack. The joint was filled with thousands upon thousands {If porno movies and magazines, and it had a wall of sexual top, that advertised experimentation in sexual intercourse, The store itselfwas broken into five

Eat

l

or six dif&erent sections, deFnding on your sexual tmc, and all of which display+ thousands of porno movies available for purchase. There was one in particular that caught my curious eye, and when I pointed it out to my two friends, wc bcgall to stx-t laughing uncontrollably and 1~~ to leaw the

and that she wasn’t using her hc~nds to Md the bottle. And it was a big bottle too, We left Amsterdam as fast as M’e cJrnc’ to it. We woke up that day and got on d train to Paris. As the train left Centr& Stntiolz, we breathed a sigh CAY relief and silently began to think about the most intense place on earth that we had ever been to.

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Fear of the Key by Andrew Krywaniuk Imprint staff

T

he secure transmission of information has been a concern of ours for longer thall you may think. The famous CZaesar cipher is named after (hold your breath.. .) Julius Caesar. Mary,Quecn of Cots, lost her head when she discovered that her code had been broken. Rut in those davs the hardest part (,fconlmunication was & the code, but the actual transportation of a message from OIIC place to another. Now it is normal to be able to talk to someone on the other side of the world at the touch ofa button. Well, 7 buttons.. , pIus the area and country codes and your calling card and the long distance wxss number. But the challenges are even more severe, both because the requirements are so strict and because vour enemies have powerful cryptographii tools at their disposal. The old sr)40 nfencoding messages was to obfilssatc &cm with a difficult-to-decipher encnrption yroccss. Each pair ofcommunicanti would establish a different code for their private messages. But this tcchnique does not prove useful in a world where a single sof’tM’are program will be used by millions ofpcopie and where we are

I

often forced to communicate with people whom WC do not necessarily trust. An encryption techniq& must effectively randomize data. The only per&x encryption algorithm is a one-time pad, a series of random bytes ofthe same length as the message text. The scheme is unbreakable because its output is complctelj uncorrelated, but iB disadvantage is that the partics must meet beforehand to choose a stream of random data. Recycling one-time pads would allow a wily cryptologist the opportunity to find a pattern. h4athematicians think thev have found a solution. During the mid-seventies, researchers who were investigating the concept of fundamentally hard math problems had an interesting idea. We usually develop algorithms that can solve problems as quicklv as possible, but if we could find a proble& for which no good algorithm exists then it could be useful for cryptography. The Diffie-Hellman kev exchange algorithm is an example. It a.liLws two people who have never met before to choose a number known only to the two of them. The conversation can be held in public, but it would take millions of years (with today’s technology) for an eavesdropper to decipher their exchange and guess the number.

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Another example is the RSA algorithm, upon which the popular Pretty Good Privacy (PGP) sofnvare is based. The math problem here is factoring the product of two large primes. The “ouxr” of the key knows the answers because he originally chose them. Anvone can send him messages, but only he can crack the code easily because he knows the secret trapdoor. There are many other mathematical algorithms with applications to cr\rptography. T per” sonall\ prefer problems with elliptic curves. T’his is only really half the story. Complex mathematical algorithms place a heavv burden on c’omputtrr networks so they ar;’ not rcail\: practical to USC all the t&c. A more common practice is to use these secure methods to exchange some sort of secret key that is then used in a more economical (and less secure) algorithm. The most popular such algorithm, called DES, was invented by IBM under the advisory of the NSA. A few conspiracists even maintain that the NSA included a

secret back-door so they can read people’s - 250WA-lT -- _-.

Power

Supply

e-mail. IX3 is used because it is both fast and very resistant to all but the most sinister cryptographic attacks. There is a catch. Some countries don’t allow their citizens to send private e-mail. The U.S. allows Americans to send private messages, but they insist that software sold to foreign markeis have a key escrow feature that allows law enforcement of&&Is to snoop in on conversations. Otherwise, they only allow limited-DES, a bastardized algorithm that offers a fraction of the security of regular DES. Unlike DES, limited-DES is actuall) within the reach of the dedicated brute force search. It’s not easy. Several people have broken limited-DES keys using hundreds ofcomputers over the stian of a Couple of months. Unfortunately, due to U.S. export regulations, this is the algorithm that Netscape uses for financial transactions involving credit card numbers. The NSA has several ridiculous cryptographic pcslities. In one case, they ruled that a book of cryptographic algorithms was suitable for export, but a disk containing the text of the book should be export-restricted. While limited-DES is susceptible to brute force attacks, there are much more

clegnt ways to crack the implementation

of an encryption algorithm. It must Lx remembered that any non-randomness in the encl-)lpted text can become a weakness. One cryptologist cracked DES by analyzing small diRercncos in the amount oftime it takes to encode messages using different ke)ls. Former UWstudcnt Ian Goldberg was in the news last year fix discovering a flaw in Netscape’s random number generation algorithm th;tt made it prsssiblc to break limited-DES in a matter of minutes. StiIl, the dearth of cryptogrq-hit algosrmed& d be able to communicate pri\Xcly with dn~~mc in the world. Escrpt for one nagging thorn ofdoubt: quantum computing. Quantum computing is still W-I the fringe ofscience. It is not just the next step beyond nano- technology; it is a fundamental new concept for computers. Regular computers exccutc instructions in sequence. Advanced computers clin even run programs on several difikrent processors at the same time. Quantum computing relics on the interfirence patterns created by photon waves to facilitate the process of factoring large numbers, so that it is no longer fundamentally harder to break the RSA algorithm than it is to encryptd with it. Quantum computing may never succeed because it is hard to keep the subatomic sys tcm free from outside disturbances. Or the concept rnsV rel\l on the many worlds interpretatiA of &a&urn dyna&s : the idea that what we perceive as reality is merely an interference pattern between many different possible realities that we are experiencing. But if it works then software can k written that shares the burden offactoring numbers among many # diKerent universes and ensures that the world we perceive is the one in which the answer is Found. It may not seem obvious at first glance, but so much ofour society has come to rely upon strong cryptography that such a drastic discovery would virtually send us back into the s&c age of communications and financial technology. On the other hmd, it would advance our ability to pcrfot-m numerical communication bv thousands of times. It seems to be a theme of all my courses this term that everything is ,I trade* off. This is no exception.


Chambers rocks Blues

This Wwkend in

Varsity

Warriors redeemed after being reamed by Gryphs

sports

by Ryan Tucks” F’yeti Imprint staff

Friday November 29

D

Athena and Warrior Swilnmhg QUAA Invitational at Toronto 5:QQpm. Saturday, November

30

Athena Basketball at Western 7 p.m. Athena and Warrior Track and Field Western SeasonOpener I:30 p*m.

Quote of the week “We figure they both have tough jobs: Boeheim had to motivate Derrick Coleman; the professors had to try to educate I# h im l

An ESPN gussip guy on why Syracuse Buekim

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ragging himself into the dressing room for last Sunday afternoon’s match-up with the Toronto Varsity. Blues, Mike Chambers didn’t much like his prospects. He was tired. Every Waterloo-ite can sympathize with the run-down, helpless feelings experienced during the stressful end-of-term, pre-exam period. For Chambers, a Kinesiology Masters’ student, Village One Don, and hard-working centre for the Waterloo Varsity hockey squad, sleep has been, lately, a long-lost friend. No one could have blamed Chambers if he performed lower than expectations on Sunday. The Varsity Blues would have c$ckly forgiven him if he st-ayed in his Village bed. In fact, that would deftitelv have been the Metrobased cl&% preference after beholding the sleepy-eyed Chambers strike for four consecutive goals, piggy-backing Waterloo to a 6-3 win. Y Not only did 01’ number Twenty-Five light the lamp for four biscuits, but he achieved the uncommon feat of scoring four different ways. His first was notched short-handed. His second, on the powerplay. The hat trick was even-strength. Number four became an empty-netter. There is only one other way to score in a hockey game. The penalty shot. Last weekend against Queen’s, Mike Chambers scored twice. Once on a penalty shut. Who writes scripts like this? The man himself accounted for his success in a professional manner. “I felt good on the ice, but &er each shift was over, I could feel it,” recalled Chambers of the exhaustion. “I’m looking fonvard to the month-long (December) break from hockey.” With captain Steve Smith out with an injury against Toronto, Chambers received extra ice time and used it advantageously. “The other three centremen had to pickup the slack for Steve,” observed Chambers. And Mighty Mike is not one to shirk responsi-

bilitv. With the four goal outburst, Chambers ties Peter Brearlcy for the team lead with eleven snipes. Stephane Angers, aMcGiU marksman, leads the OUAA with fourteen. Another theory towards Chambers’ four goal butburst revolves around redemption following Guelph’s 7-4 win at Columbia last Thursday. The Gryphs torched Joe Harris for four goals in one hundred seconds (yes, that’s one eve+ twenty-five seconds for the mathematically inclined) at the end of tie second frame during a total team defensive breakdown. Jason Reesor, Guelph forward, supplied four goals in the game. Is Guelph a league powerhouse? Mike Chambers is reluctant to acknowledge the Red and Gold as a superior puck-chasing outfit. “They’re good, but I see no reason why we can’t beat them down the road,” comments Chambers. Warrior forward Peter B rearley agrees ‘We took the play to Guelph. Then, we broke down in our own end for ten minutes, and it cost us the game.” In a poorly-reffed affair, the two teams combined for 110 penalty minutes based on several skirmishes. As Don Cherry would say, iet’s let the Boys play. The Christmas break for the Warriors began Thursday after their tilt with Laurier at Columbia IceFields. Results were unavailable at press time. l

(with the puck) joined Mario Lemieux in hockey history by scoring four go& four different ways Sunday.

Chambers

Imy MaI1 I a -- relaman 7-.I Ia

Guelph 7 Wariors

4

First Period 1. Guelph, Reesor (Rosebush, Davis) 11: 04. 2. Guelph, Reesor 2 (Monkman, Foster) (pp) 18:05. Second Period 3. Warriors, MundeU (Austin, Oliver) 4: 23. 4. Warriors, Goldie (Vaughan) (pp) 7:54. 5. Guelph, Reesor 3 (Thompsun, Davis) (pp) 15:50. 6. Guelph, Foster’( Reesor, Davis) 16: 19. 7, Guelph, Spitzig (Rosebush) 17:09. 8. Guelph, Reesor 4 (Davis) 17:30. Third Period 9, Warriors,

Kraemer

(Chambers,

Esdaie) l&28. 10. Warriors, Brearley (unassisted) 17:31. 11. Guelph, Foster 2 (Rosebush) (en) 19:35. Penalty Minutes: Warriors-%, ‘Guelph-52.

Wmiors

6 Toronto 3

First Period 1. Warriors, Brearley (Goldie, Smith) 0: 39. 2. Toronto, Bellissimo (Andrikopoulis) 9:33. 3. Toronto, Welsh (unassisted) 13:34. 4. Warriors, Fullerton (Vaughan, Esdale) 1513. 5. Warriors, Chambers (Esdale, Palmer) (sh) l&44. 1 6. Warriors, Chambers 2 (Palmer, Kraemer) (pp) 19:22. Second Period 7. Warriors, Chambers 3 (G&die) 11:44. 8- Toronto, Coon (Marcido, Satko) (pp) 14:23. Third Period 9. Warriors, Chambers 4 (Harris) (en) l&45. Penalty Minutes : Warriors - 14, Toronto- 14.


20

SPORTS

IMPRINT,

Friday, November

29, 1996

Volleyball Warriors swept by Hawks by Jeff Peeks Imprint stdf

L

ike all devastating

up points in bunches, and when they threatened, couldn’t put the opposition away. The team looked flat all night and gave

diseases,

eventually a cure is found. And if the disease doesn’t mutate and adapt to the cure, it will disappear. TheSack Plague, in the form of the Waterloo Warrior volleyball team, used to be a disease that struck fear into the hearts of the

nobody really stood up and took charge when the team needed it. Set one saw Lauricr jump out to a quick 4-O lead, mainly off poor Warrior passing. The Warriors managed to regain their composure and brought the game to within three points, 10-7. Laurier then scored five unanswered points to take the first set easily,

OUAA West division. Now, it seems that an-antibiotic .has been found, and the Laurier Golden 15-7. Hawks used it on the Warriors on The second set saw much of Wednesday night, coming away the same, with the Hawks scorwith a 3-O sweep (15-7,15-9,15ing five quick points. The Warri13), and indicating that the balors shrugged it off and made the ance of power in Waterloo uniscore 6-5 Laurier. The teams then versity volleyball has shifted to got into a great sideout battle, the high school down the street. with nobody being able to score The Warriors were plagued for long periods of time. by same problems that have been ’ With the score 9-9, the Warbothering them a.Useason. They riors looked like they were finally

The Warrims

prepare

for a save, in one of the few bright

spots on a disappdnthg photo

in the game. It was not to be, however, as Laurier put together yet another run, closing out the set with six srraight points to win the second set 15-9. Set three was much more competitive, although the Warriors still couldn’t stop the big runs. Waterloo were down 9-3 thanks to a 5-O Laurier run. The Warriors then started to show signs of life, putting together their own run to take a 12-30 lead. How-

ever, the Warriors could not put the stuffing in the Hawks, and lost a heartbreakitig 15-13 decision, giving Laurier the sweep. After the game, coach Tony Martins was not pleased by his team’s performance. “We don’t want to win badly enough,” he lamented. He questioned his team’s heart, saying that there was “not a shred of guts” displayed on the night, -When

asked what

he would

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by

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do to remedy the situation, Martins seemed at a loss for words. ‘You can’t coach guts,” he admitted. He is hoping that the team gets out of this f&k soon. The Warriors will have plenty of time to try to get out of their fin&. Their next game is not until January 22,1997, when they host the Windsor Lancers, which will be a serious gut check for the team as they look to rebound from a disappointing 2-3 start.

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IMPRINT,

Friday,

November

2-l

SPORTS

29, 1996

Vanier Cup ticket winners Champion: Civil war Piaiist: Too Hung Over To Play

3 1 Division

A2 Division

Chmpion: Kegs With Legs : Final&t: W@gum Chid

Champiok; In&viduals Finalist: Sowh Penguins .’

32 Division

BZ. Division

.’

Chpion: wmiers E$xdistr SUII-F EkKkey

B 3 Division

B2 Division Keswick Hicks

Champion: ‘I3:,,t:.-d,

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Champion; Beached Whales Pidist: The Tribe

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Champion; Arirang Hoops Finalist: The Team

Champion: The BoTs Finalist: Optometry Year 1

Champion: The Spuckers Finalist: Individuals

C Division

C Division

C2 Division

Champion: North A Alti Finalist: Stallingrads

Champion: Baky’s Bunc:h Fkulistz Me<h Bulk

Champion: TWSA Finalist: North B

By the way, the answer to the trivia question was the Alberta Golden Bears, who won the fkst true national championship game in 1967.

Athenas come back for victory over Laurier

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The Athenas looked impressive tate the Golden Chickens 3-2.

Wednesday,

by Jeff Peeters Imprint staff

T

he Athena volleyball team rose from a certain death on Wednesday, coming back to defeat the Laurier Golden Hawks 3-2 (7-l 5, 13-15, 15-4, 15-11, 15-5) in an exciting match at the PAC. The Athenas found themselves down two sets following some uninspired play. Laurier looked like th:y were going to get a quick and easy two points, but the Athenas rose from the near dead to shut the door. In the third set, the Athenas came out and made a statement that this match was far from over with a 15-4 crushing. The

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Athena’s dominance appeared to be shortlived, however, when Laurier staked an 1 l2 lead in the fourth set. Again, Waterloo was on the ropes, and responded in one of the greatest comebacks in recent memory, scoring 13 unanswered points to take the fourth set. The comeback seemed to deflate the ltel Hawks, as the Athenas moved in for the kiU ‘idad,ea and clipped their wings, winning the rally- , point fifth set 15-5, a relative sheliacking given that a point is awarded on every play. The Athenas can sit on this victory and build on it for 1997. They travel to Nipissing on January 17 for a doubleheader in subarctic North Bay. The Athenas are now 32, while Laurier drops to l-5.

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22

SPORTS

Varsityroundup Athmu l&w&ball The Athenas opened their regular season schedule last Wednesday with a 49-42 road loss to the Guelph Gryphons, a team they had beaten previously in tournament play. Both teams started slowly but Guelph held a 22-19 edge at halftime. The score was tied with 7:49 to play when the Gryphons went on a seven-point run that proved the difference. Rookie Janis Goldie led the Athena scorers with 13 points and eight rebounds. Jodi Hawley pitched in nine points and eight rebounds.

Donaldson (4 points) I The Warriors’ record now stands at 66 overall. The Warriors’ next game is at 8 p.m. on Saturday when they face Niagara College at the PAC.

warriorBcnrketball

The inability to close out sets and win tough matches continued to plague the young Warrior volleyball team as they fell to Western 3-O in London last Wednesday and struggled to a 2-2 record at the Guelph Invitational tournament this weekend. Against Western, the Warriors suffered from a bad case of the jitters and fell 15-6 in the first set. They recovered to play very well in the second and third sets, but couldn’t hold late leads in either game. Scores were 15-13, 15-12. On Friday in Guelph, Waterloo opened against Rutgers and won the second set, 17- 16, but could not maintain a high level of play and eventually dropped the match 3-l. A subsequent 3-l win over Bock set up an important meeting with Windsor on Saturday morning. The Lancers came out flat and gave Waterloothefirsttwogarnes, 158and 15 9, but the Warriors could not close the door. Windsor picked up their play and won the next three games to shock Waterloo. Finally, The Warriors played McGill for 11th spot in the M-team event and easily prevailed, 3-1, Brian Snooks was Waterloo’s best player over the course of the tournament. The fourth-year setter served, blocked and played excellent defence while demonstrating excellent leadership and work ethic. The Warriors host Laurier tonight (Wednesday) in a critical divisional contest at 8 pm.

This weekend the Warrior basketball team travelled to Tiffin, Ohio for the Tiffin University Can-Am Invitational and came away with one win and one loss. Friday night, the Warriors took on the host Tiffin University Dragons. The game was controlled by the Dragons and the Warriors were never able to get into a rhythm. Waterloo held the game close, for quite some time but in the end too many turnovers proved costly- Tiffin won the game, 78-69. Top pefiormers for the Warriors were Mark Eys (16 points), Paul Kwiatkowski (10 points), Mark Rigaux (9 points), Remy Donaldson (9 points), and Pat Gorman (10 rebounds). Saturday afternoon, the Warriors showed their ability to dig themselves out of a hole. The team was traiKng by 16 points quite early against Ohio Dominican, 22-6. The Warriors then called a pair of time-outs and responded by scoring 11 straight points to make it a game again. Trailing 35-31 at halftime, the Warriors knew they would have to play better defense at the beginning of the second half, and they did just that, scoring the first 10 points.of the third quarter. Waterloo went on to win the game by a final count of 7462. Top performers for the Warriors were Mark Eys (17 points), Mano Witsa (15 points), Derek Maat (13 points, 9 rebounds),PatGorman(!?points),ar~dRemy

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The Athenas fell to 2-2 on the regular season when they lost 3-O to the Western Mustangs last Wednesday night in London Set scores were 15-13, 15-8, 15-8.

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from

Stratiord, Chambers continued his hot streak with four goals on Sunday as the Warriors beat U of T, 6-3. Chambers also led Waterloo in penalty killing and scored a natural hat trick. He has notched 11 points in the past four games.

Goldie led the Athenas with 13 points and eight rebounds as they opened their regular season with a close 49-42 loss to the Guelph Gryphons. Goldie, an Arts student, is a rookie’starter from Owen Sound who has been near the top of the Athena stat sheet on several occasions this season.


I

HOCKEY

I

ou?iA FAREAST

GPW

UQTR McGill

11

L

T

F

A TP 24

10

1

0

63

Concordia

12 8 12 7

4 5

0 0

74 45 16 55 51 14

Ottawa

11

7

0

30

MID

EAST

Guelph Toronto Queen’s RMC

4

43

8

GP W

L

T

F

12 11 12 12

6 3

1 4 9

0 1 0

55 22 22 55 43 13 28 77 6

1

11

0

26

11

L

MIDWESTGPW

T

F

A

20

78 A

TP

2

10 6

4

0

48 37 12

York

10

6

1

36

Brock

10 3 12 2

Ryerson

3

FARWESTGPW Watertoo Western Windsor Laurier

7 0 10 0 L

11 9

37

7

28 39 6 31 54 4

T

F

A

TP

2

0

55 31 18

5

4

0

40

10 4 11 3

4 6

2 2

38 36 10 31 40 8

9

31

10

Upcoming Games Nov. 28 Laurier at Toronto at York at 29 Ottawa at UQTR at Brock at 30 Western at Windsor at UQTR at Laurier at RMC at CIAU HOCdEY 1. 2. 3. 4. 5. 6.

7. 8.

8.

Waterloo Labrier Ryerson Queen’s York Lauren. York Lauren. Ryerson Brock Laurier Queen’s RMC Toronto

Ottawa RMC

4 3 2 2 3 3 OT 1 3 2 2 0 2 1 3 3 2

Waterloo Guelph Western McGill

7:3Opm 7:3Opm 7:3Opm 7:OOpm

Concordia

7: 30pm

Ryerson Lauren. York McGill Brock

7 :45pm 2:UOpm 2:0opm 7:0Opm 7:30pm 7:3Opm

Queen’s ,’

TOP TEN

Calgary’ Dinosaurs UQTR PATRIOTES Adadia Axemen _GUELPH GRYPHONS Alberta Golden Bears WATERLOO WARRIORS St. Francis Xavier X-Men MCGILL REDMEN

Saskatchewan Huskies 10. UNB Varsity Reds *~l~~*~~**~**~*~*~~~~~~

SCORING

LEADERS

TEAM

Pierre Gendron Kelly Nobes Brandon Boyko S. Angers Dan Ceman

McGill McGill Windsor McGill Windsor M. Chambers Waterloo Jeff Goldie Waterloo Jason Heywood Western Kiley Hill Laurentian Peter Brearley Waterloo

)

WEST

GP

G

A

TP

12 12 10 12 10 11 11 9 10 11

13 11 12 14 7 11 9

24 19 9 7 13 9 10

37 30 21 21 20 20 19

8

10 18

11 7 18 11 7 18

PLAYER

TEAM

Matt Mullin S. Rodrigue Joe Harris Mike Hall Joe Dimaline

Guelph 8 480:00 12 1.50 UQTR 10 555:14 22 2.38 Water. 10 520:40 27 3.11 Western 5 272151 15 3.30 York 10 604:43 34 3.37

I

GP

MIN

I

OUAA TP

Toronto Queen’ s Ryerson

5 4 4

York

3

2 7 9 6

10 4 4 2

Laurentian

4

12

0

WEST

MPMW ML GW

0 2 2 2 4

15 6 6 6 3

DIVISlON

OWIAA

TEAM

G A

K. Shonk R. Brown G. White

Laurier Laurier McMast.

18 6 14234 182 10.1 14 6 77 26 108 7.7

J. Hubbard

Water.

14 0 k4 10 74 6.7 12 1 60 18 79 6.6

Schroeder J. Gravelle

Windsor Windsor Western McMast.

16 3 16 3 13 5 11 0

D. Brownlee J. Tukums

K

B TF’ PPG

61 85 58 37

38 13 13 24

102 101 76 61

6.4 6,3 5.9 5.6

OWIAA EAST

MP MW ML 6

0

6 6 6 4 422674 5 1

6

0 2

5

0

6

0

GW

GL

TP

18 18 12

1

12

3 4

12 8

5

7 0

12 15

2 0

6

4

18

0

4

WEST

MP MW ML GW GL TP

Western Windsor

8

8

0

Guelph

MPMW ML GW GL

BASKETBALL

PLAYER

Toronto York Ottawa Queen’ s Carleton Ryerson Lakehead

GAAVG

VOLLEYBALL

5 2 2 1 0

(cont.)

VOLLEYBALL

LEADING GOALTENDERS

EAST

Results Nov. 21 Guelph 7 Toronto 9 22 McGill 6 Western 7 Concordia 5 UQTR 4 23 UQTR 7 Concordia 6 Ottawa 5 McGill 5 Guelph 5 Windsor 3 Western 7 24 Waterloo 6 Brock 6 Windsor 10

(cont.

INDIVIDUAL

TP

Laurentian

HOCKEY

McMas ter Waterloo Laurier Brock Nipissing

24 17 13 9 6 4

3 6

GPW

Laurentian York Toronto Ryerson Carleton Ottawa Queen’s

4 4 3 3 3 3 4

WEST

GPW

Guelph Windsor Brock Lakehead McMaster Western Laurier Waterloo

L 3 3 2 1

0 0 0

F

A

TP

1

277 213 6 265 245 6

1

234

2 3 3 4

177 195 2 1162360 1762360 252 290 0

1

L

205

F

A

4

TP

1

1

0

49 42

2

1 0

1 0

0 0

59 0

46 0

2 0

0 0 0 0 000000 10.1 1 0

0 0

0 0

0 0

0 0

46

59

0

42 49

0

Results Nov. 20 Guelph 23 Windsor

1

49 Waterloo 59 Laurier

42 46

16’

Games UPC oming Nov. 27 Brock at Laurier 28 Toronto at Queen’s 29 Carleton at Ottawa Bishop’s at Concordia 5 Lava1 at McGill 30 Toronto at Ryerson Waterloo at Western Bishop’s at McGill Lava1 at Concordia

10 4 6 12

0 15 1 18

Results Nov.20 Guelph

3 Brock M-14, 15-6) McMaster 3 Windsor (15-8, 7-15, 15-11, 15-i?) Western ,3 Waterloo (15-13, 15-8, 15-B) 22 York 3 Queen’s

GL TP

EAST

0

7:30pm 6:0Opm 5:30pm 6:OOpm 6:OOpm

6:00pm 2:00pm 6:OOpm 6:OOpm

(15-7,

Western Laurier McMaster Waterloo Windsor Guelph Brock

6 5 4

5 4 3

1

17

5

10

1 1

13 10

5 4

8 6

2 1

3 4

6 4

10

4

13

2

0

5

2

15

0

422664

5 5 5

(15-9,

(15-13,

Upcoming Nov.

26

27 29

30

3

(15-6,

15-12)

15-13,

Games York at Brock at Laurier at Queen’s at Guelph at Toronto at Waterloo at Queen’s at LEADING

Waterloo

Ryerson McMaster Waterloo York Windsor Ryerson McMaster Lauren.

(15-7,

SCORERS

0 2

(15~13,14-16, 12-15, 15-3, 15-S)

I

TRACK

McMaster Waterloo York Queen’s McMaster Windsor

AND

6:OOpm 6:00pm 7:30pm 6:30pm 6:UOpm 6:OOpm

FIELD

I

G

A

K

B

TP PPG

Van Huizen

York

CarimBocas Szczurek M. Cvihun P. Rainville

Ryerson Toronto Queen’s Lauren

12 15 17 13

2 2 8 3

80 80 90 60

10 19 10 14

92 101 108 77

7.7 6.7 6.4 5.9

15 3 61 25 88 5.9

Nov.

30 Western

Season

CENTRAL

W

L

W

L

TP

Laurentian McMaster York

2 1 11

0 0

2 2 02

0 .O

Toronto

0 0

0 3

2

0

Ryerson

1

1

6 4 2 2 1

WEST

w

L

w

L

TP

Guelph Waterloo Laurier Brock Western

3

0

1

2

1 0 1

2 1 1

NOTE: League wins = 2 points

OUAA & OWIAA

TEAM

WLTP

Carleton Queen’s Ottawa RMC Trent

IS-O, 15-l) *I 3 Ottawa (15-8, 15-6, 15-7) 23 Ottawa 3 Ryerson (15-1, 15-8, 15-3) York 3 Carleton

Upcoming Game8 Nov. 27 Brock at Laurier at 28 Toronto at 29 Ottawa - at Waterlod at Guelph at

NUN-CON.

WL

EAST

0

EAST DIVISION PLAYER

LEAGUE

0

York

0

L

OUAA

15-7, 15-9)

0

8:OOpm 8:OOpm 8:00pm 7:30pm 8:OOpm 8:OOpm 8:OOpm 8:OOpm

0

Nipissing

1

15-I I, I5-6)

Western

3

Western 3 Nipissing (15-9, 15-4, 15-2) Carleton 3 Ryerson

23

SWIMMING

15-7, 15-4)

Western (15-7,

Results Nov. 20 Guelph 3 Brock (11-15, Is-m, 15-11, 15-10) McMaster 3 Windsor

1

Opener

1:30pm

Non-conference

wins

Upcoming Meets Nov. 29 OUAA and OWIAA Invitational

at Toronto

= 1 point

5:OOpm


24

SPORTS

IMPRINT,

Friday, November

29, 1996

HOMEFORTHE

Who needs reindeer? from KitchenerNaterlod to: Toronto

Peterborough

-7

$22 Belleville $51. Sudbury $91, $42 London $20 Ottawa $85

Other discounted destinations avaikible. Price does not include G.S.T.

Pickups on campus for Toronto. Dropoffs also available. At Matthews Hall, William G. Davis Centre, Engineering 1 Building. Please see schedute.

Surf to http://www.greyhound.ca/

MRAMELm University Shops Plaza

Gn

170 Univeisity Avenue W.

15 Charles Street W. Kitchener

886dl400

741-2600

I

0 ACURA

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First of all, let me say that I hate the Dallas Cowboys. With a passion. I hate them because they are cocky, I hate them because of Jerry Jones, and, most of all, I hate them for the two shellackings that they laid on my beloved Buffdo Bills in those two Super Bowls. Also, Green Bay was my pick to win the Super Bowl early in the year, before they lost half of their receiving corps. It doesn’t take a genius to see that I should view every Dallas Cowboy move as evil a& every Green Bay Packer move as inhe;ently perfect. However, like the baseball owners did this week when they approved the same labour deal that they rejected a few weeks ago, I’mgoing to go against my personal grain. The Pack was wrong. Period. TwoMonday nights ago, Dallas was giving Green Bay fits, shutting them down while adding up field goals, courtesy of Cowboy placekicker Chris Boniol. Boniol had kicked six field goals and Dallas had a comfortable 1% 6 lead with 20 seconds left in the

game.

Instead of running out the clock, Dallas elected to kick a meaningless Geld goal. Under normal circumstances, this would be an atrocious display of “rubbing it in.” However, there is a difference between “rubbing it in,“’ and going for a record. A seventh field goal would tie Boniol with two others for most field goals kicked in a game. If you have a chance for the record, why not go for it? Bonioi’s kick was good, and he had a piece of the record. Unfortunately, the Packers disapproved of this. So, many Packer players proceeded to go over to the Cowboys’ bench and start a confrontation which resulted in a few fights and a general state of unrest along the Dallas sideline. Green Bay and Dallas have never really liked each other, and I can understand how the Pack might be a little pissed. However, their actions were beyond good taste and good sense. Face it, Dallas had a shot for a record, and thev got it. That’s not a team making sure you know that you

just got your asswhooped, that’s a team trying to get one of their guys into the history books. Green Bay had no business overreacting like they did. You don’t go over to a team’s bench and start looking for a fight. If you’re mad, use it as motivation for when you meet them next time (these two teams Will meet again this season, barring any huge upsets) so that you can whoop their ass back. That way, you can send them a message that they’ll ye@ remember. One of the things that makes sports fun is the pursuit of records. That’s why records are kept. There was stil1 excitement at the end of this decisive Cowboy win. Would he get the record? The anticipation of that seventh field goal was probably the most exciting part of the game. Heck, the Cowboys had a dutv to the fans to kick that field goal, and I would have been ticked off if they hadn’t Green Bay should just keep quiet, remember this day, use it as motivation, and kick Dallas’ teerh in when thev do meet again. That should be justice enouih.

In one of the most striking casesof irony in the last few years, four years of baseball labour strife were solved by an act of sheer greed. Jerry Reinsdorf., the owner of the Chicago White Sox and Chicago Bulls, led the campaign to have the most recent collective bargaining agreement voted down, claiming that it offered nothing to -help lower salaries, which is the primary concern among baseball owners. Eventually, the agreement was defeated by the owners in a very close vote. Then, he went out and signed free agent slugger Albert Belle to the most lucrative contract in baseball history, $55 million over 5 years, Needless to say, this alienated several of the owners, including almost all who sided with Reinsdorf in defeating the deal. As soon as the press conference announcing the Belle signing ended, it’s almost a sure thing that the phone lines were jammed u+h

couple of weeks, what are baseball fans to think? Well, for the better part of the next five years, we’ll be hearing no more from Bud Selig, or Randy Levine, or Donald Fehr, or even those nasty words “collective bargaining.” That in itself is a blessing. Now, the problem of bringing baseball back to the forefront of the sporting consciousness begins. First step is replacing the terribly uncharismatic Bud Selig with a commissioner who can relate to the fans, appeal to the fans and actually make people give a damn. The second step is to integrate this new packige, bringing in the salary cap, levelling off the ascent of playersalaries and introducing league play, all of which should get fans back to the ballyard. And third, never let this happen again. The whole problem could have been solved four years ago, but egos overwhelmed logic, and the game suffered, This will

with baseball was more interested in the green of the field, rather than the green of his wallet. It would be nice to think that Reinsdorf was using subterfuge to show the owners the right way to go, but that would be giving this pig more credit than he deserves. After all, as a result of his greed, he will lose his star pitcher Alex Fernandez to free agency. Fernandez is one of several players who will be granted extra service time as a result of the deal, and with Belle and Frank Thomas’ contracts, plus the luxury cap, Michael Jordan may have to take a pay cut if Reinsdorf wants to keep Fernandez. And as anyone who follows baseball knows, one great pitcher is worth a dozen power hitters. But still, today’s baseball fans owe a great debt to Albert Belle and Jerry Reinsdorf, whose rampant desire for money has finally brought labour peace to America’s game.

Your car’s home away from home. St+XVtC~

*Ask &out

by Factory

‘t‘rairwd

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‘t’dmicians

appreciation

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519-893-9000 http://autorev.com/fairviewacura ride to UW or WLU

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reconsidering

their stance.

This led to the convening of a new owner’s meeting last Tuesday, at which time the same agreement was ratified by a 26-4 count. Coincidence? In the aftermath of these past

be the

true

sign

of whether

ated

the

game is heading in the right direction or not. It would be nice to think that Jerry Reinsdorfwas acting in the interests of the game. It would be nice to think that anyone associ-

Quick note here, I’ve decided it’s time to put my name on this column, so instead of”View from the Cheap Seats” by The Fan, you’ll be getting the same ideas in “The Fan” by Greg Picken.


Believe the Hype! Hy e! directed

by Stme He Pvey and Doag

Pray

playing at Cinepix Headquarters by Andrew Kqwaniuk Imprint stdf

I

saw Hyp!

in the context

that I like to

see a movie - knowing almost nothing. This enables mc to judge the movie from an unbiased perspective:.. sort of. The film openswith some beautim camerawork and you know right away that it’s not going to be just a cheesy documentary. It is a documentary, though. Hype! is the story of grungc, the Seattle phenomenon that became an overnight successworldwide. Apparently, the music bec:ame so popular in Europe that CDs were sold in Plain black packaging with the word Seattle on them; bands that had moved tocalifornia, hoping to make it big, are moving back in droves. The film fol-

lows the story of Sub Pop Records, the driving force behind the local music scene. What makes H*e! so successfLl is the perfect interlacing of interviews and music clips. The subjects range from Pearl Jam and Soundgarden to lesser known bands such as Coffin Break and the Mono Men. There art: also conversations with the full complement of behind-the-scenes players: the producer, the photographer, the graphic designer, and the gratuitous guy with the British accent. The success of the film is partly based on the lack of editorializing. As the filmmakers will testify, they had to overcome the urge to pollute the material with their own perspective. But the result is straightforward and honest, and the images speak for themselves. One of the goals ofHtie! is to expose the mainstream media’s portrait of the Seattle phenomenon assensationalism. Part of the irony of the movie is that the musicians reved some of the intriguing lies which they had told to the ever-intrusive media. We are somehow convinced that they are telling the truth now, but it is hard to be sure. Steve Helvey and Doug Pray spent 3 years making Hype!. The biggest challenge was getting to know local bands and working from the ground up. By presenting an honest portrait of the lesser-known bands they were able to gain

Hey, if these guys like Crunge, it must be COOL the confidence of the Seattle sensations, and thus convince them that this was a project worth supporting. It was this degree of trust that earned the two filmmakers increasingly alluring footage, inchIding an interview wirh Jack Endino (the “Godfather of Grunge”), Pearl Jam’s “Self-Pollution” radio show, and a recording of Nirvana’s first-ever performante of “Smell’s Like Teen Spirit,” On the other hand, it made me question whether the directors had lost their journalistic integrity. The close allegiance they formed with Sub Pop Records led to the promotion of the film’s soundtrack and, possibly, the commercialization of the film. One of the themes of the film that I disagreed with was the suggestion that

Seattlites have always been somehow a bit strange, and that is the driving force behind the grunge phenomenon. The idea was advanced by Art Chantry, a graphic designer and pop art librarian who is the character who I nmst suspect of acting for the camera. I come from the West Coast. I have lived in Seattle. I ref&e to believe the allegation that Seattle is the weirdness capital of the U.S. But I saved the negative points until the end of the review because I wanted you to get the idea that this is a film worth seeing, Ic is a revealing and humourous perspective on the state of Seattle music, and its appeal is heightened the inclusion of videos which rise above the standard MTV fare by virtue of their simpliciw d and elegance.

rea or sex ? Weezer Phoenix Friday, November 22 by James Russell Imprint staff

T

t was packed, seriously packed. When the Phoenix sells out, it evidently means Athat they sold one ticket for eve+ square foot of floor space. And Weezer sold out. Touring to promote their second and long-awaited album Pinketion, Rivers Cuomo (guitar, vocals, and lone writer on Pinkerton) and the boys took to the stage at the ridiculously early hour of 7:30 p.m, so the Phoenix could get everyone out by 9 and have their regular club night. But for a band like Weezer, this might not be such a bad deal. Seing done by 9 means all the 14 year-olds in the crowd can make their 10 p.m. curfews. And I4 yearolds there were. I might have been the only person there who actually owns a razor. Anyway, Weezer hit the smge on time

and in good spirits. Bassist Matt Sharp (of Rentals fame) immediately began playing the crowd, waving for applause and generally goofing off (he would play a mcrcifull~~ brief drum solo later in the evening). Neve> ones to miss a chance to play up a cliche, Cuomo, Brian Bell (vocals, guitar) and Sharp all stepped up to the mic to announce “This is the first song from our new album,” before launching into “Tired ofsex.” The crowd went nuts. I haven’t seen an entire crowd start moshing like that in a long time. I mean, basically the whole dance floor was dancing. Pretty crazy. Though the set was dominated by the new album, more than a few of the oldies were played, but considering Weezer only has two albums and the new one is only 35 minutes long, that’s not such a surprise. Nonetheless, it was nice to hear “My name is Jonas,” “Undone-the Sweater song,” and “In the garage.” The new stuff went over really well. I mean really well. Though Pinketion hasn’t stampeded its way up the charts or any-

thing, the crowd knew the material and sang along to most of it. ‘Getchoo” and “No other one” were great, and when it was time for the expected ‘Lel Scorcho” and “Pink triangle, ” (where Rivers laments that the girl he loves is a lesbian, saying “Everyone’s a little queer, why can’t she be a little straight?“) people went crazy. However, the largest nxd of applause of Rivers Cuomo said “Might have smoked a few in the evening came, not my time, never thought it was a crime,” but we for the rock, but for Riv- couldn’t get a photo of him, so this is Brian IBelL ers Cuomo doing photo by Scott Preston Piakmtmz’s closer “ButterfJy” solo on an acoustic guitar when the needlessly distorted, and not just straight band took a breather. off the album. The guys were having a great An excellent show. The songs were a time, and the crowd was right into it. And little different live, but not hopelessly and everyone met their curfew.


26

ARTS

IMPRINT,

Friday, November

29, 1996

Rusty shines Rusty w/ &de

& Scutterbotch volGuno

Saturday, November 23 by Cl8 Snyder special to Imprint

1996 Mazda MX-6 Myst&re By special arrangement with a chartered Canadian bank, we can put you into a new Mazda before you graduate. If you have a job waiting for you upon graduating, give us a call or stop by our showroom for details on this exclusive offer for graduates.

“It Just Feels Right”

WHERE

THE EXPRESSWAY ENDS SAVINGS BEGIN 115 Northfield Dr., W., Waterloo

746-l 666

(Northfield

at the Parkway)

plea to all moshers: stop trying to injure people. A lea to ail crowd surfers: surf with prudence. Maybe I’m making too big a deal out of this, but when bodies travelling overhead and people knocking me around force me to permanently avert my attention from the music, I begin to question the original point of concerts. I am a big supporter of moshing and surfing but it should be an enjoyable experience for any person who wants to try* Here are some guidelines to help you along at your next concert. Mosher-to-surfer ratio should be no less than 20: 1.

Moshers should try to keep their bouncing exclusively up and down. Crowd animosity towards surfers can be seen in average surf times of three seconds or less and lots of dropped bodies; if you see this happening, keep to the ground. Actually, the crowd at Rusty was, for the most part, a gooh group of people. Speaking of which, Scutterbotch, another good group of people, was the first band up. This Cambridge band probably put on a good show, but a certain Imprint reporter was late arriving and won’t even attempt to forge a review. The second band on stage was Made. These MCA artists from Toronto combine the usual radio-friendly grunge chords with psychedelic guitar effects, good vocal harmonization, a strong rhythm section and a Billy Corgan look-alike for a lead singer to create a sound that is both common

but still distinct. Rusty took the stage to a fUsized crowd anxiously awaiting the band’s riff-based aggressive music. Lead singer Ken MacNeii arrived on the stage wearing a toque and apologized in advance for playing almost exclusively songs from their most recent album, Flube. If this were going to be a good concert, both MacNeil’s toque and the crowd’s inhibitions would have to be shaken off. The toque was off by the third song and the crowd didn’t stop hopping until the last encore. As a treat, Rusty played ‘Iet’s Break Robert out of Jail,” the band’s contribution to the Hard Core LOJOsoundtrack, as their last encore song. This ended yet another Volcano show, and as the crowd left, clutching their backs, sore from being dropped, content with their moment of surfing fame, there were looks of satisfaction found only at the best shows.

I wanna be a goombqh Hanson Brothers

wf 12 Eyes & Pablum VilhWU

Thursday, November 2 1 by Mike Domaratzki special to Imprint n Thursday, November 21, the Hanson Brothers road trip stopped at the Volcano Coliseum, b&ging Canada’s one and only punkhockey hybrid head to head with a nearly sold-out crowd. First up was Pablum, a new punk band from Kitchener with an insane live show. A five-piece band with two vocalists, Pablum lived up to their claim of mixing punk rock with psychedelic drugs, aided with props, double the Volcano’s usual amount of black lighting, and an odd interest in Jerry Garcia’s death. Unshaken by the prospect of playing in front of a crowd who had paid to see the Hansons, Pablum still played a high-energy, musically solid show. Very rarely does a band play a cover of IX’s “Bleed For Me,” or a song called ‘You Suck” followed closely by a song called “Fuck You,” and get away with it; Pablum did. Next on the bill were Winnipeg’s 12 Eyes, a punk band with a brand nei CD, Unit, and at least a few people who showed up just to see them play. Unbeknownst to those disappointed fans, the Volcano chose to cancel 12 Eyes

0

just shortiy

before

the show,

is the Volcano’s long-standing hobby. Then, at approximately 11: 30 p.m., Cold Lake, Alberta’s own Hanson Brothers stepped on stage to an eager crowd of both Old Schoolers in army fatigues and New Schoolers who thought thedd be original by wearing their D.0.A or No Means No T-shirts. From the first face-off, you could sense that this was no ordinarv band. Leaving no classic unplayed, the H&sons stickhandled their way through no less than 2 1 tracks from their albums GO~I Mimmduct (1992) and their latest Sudden Death The near-continuous assault paused only rarely to consult the magic S-ball, tell each and

every audience member how it was their moraI duty to send off the petition included in Sudden Death to induct Dave ‘Tiger” Williams into the Hockey Hall of Fame and, of course, scrap asonly brothers can. The Hanson Brothers strip the music to the bone, add lyrics that do more for national pride than any politician ever could, and, in the end,.make you remember why you loved punk and why you loved hockey. By the time the Hansons wrapped up their overtime encore with a delivery of “Blitzkrieg Hops” that had everyone chanting “Hey you, let’s brew,” the Hansons made you want to be a total goombah.

giv-

ing no notice at the door of 12 Eyes’ cancellation nor any reason for it. Though this seemed shockpuck you.

photo

by Mike

Domaratzki


IMPRINT,

Friday, November

Star Trek: First Contact directed

by Jonnthn

Fmkes

playing at King’s College by Greg Picken Imprint staff unning the riskofoffending a lot of people (inluding the over 1600 R people who lined up outside King’s College on a frigid open\

mediocre effort, disappointing considering the potential and UIIforgivable given the level of promotion. By now, I can’t imagine there’s a sentient being who hasn’t heard about this movie and knows

Don’t l&e tuition filtik.”

at least the basics of the plot. The Borg return, with the goal of destraying the Federation, and go back in time to sabotage the first warp-flight, and thus stop “First Contact” (Earth’s first contact with alien life). The Enterprise follows, with the epic and daunting task ofensuring that the meeting takes place. As is to be expected, First Contncr is a treat to look at. Everything is done with the usual Star Trek grandeur: rich use of primary coiours, excellent shot selections and special effects. The settings and ships are magnificently constructed, including the all-new Enterprise E, which has been rendered more a warship than exploring vessels

increases? Burg Downey says, “Resistance is graphic

by Stew Johnston

The acting was as good ascan be expected from Star Trek, with terrific jobs turned in by the leads, Patrick Stewart and Brent Spiner. The cast reprised their TV roles and were adequate at best, though vastly underused, Many were wasted in the “First Contact” subplot, being beamed off the Enterprise and spending scant screen time on the planet fising the Borg’s sabotage. As the focal point of the plot, Alice Krigc makes the pcrfeet blend of human and machine as the reptilian Borg Queen. What madeJ’& G.~ztnct disappointing for me foremost was the result of the blitzkrieg of advertising that preceded the movie’s opening. In the commercials for this movie, almost every interesting plot point was given away. As events transpired on screen, I was in a constant state of dCja vu, feeling that I’d already lived through it all once before. There were no surprises, no unpredicatable turns ofevents, and the only uncertainty was the identity of the aliens who made the first contact. But think about it: who are the only aliens Earth has never been at war with? What was the first alien race viewers were introduced to? It’s all very logical, when you think about it. Wth First Contact, there wasn’t a sentimental selling point, such as the meeting of Captains Picard and Kirk, so they tried to make an action film, which leads to my second significant problem. The script from Star Trek veterans Ronald Moore and Brannon Braga is a mess, with several good ideas, several glaring problems, and no sense of direction. The movie is billed as an

And eat it, too A

Super Cake Trio

w/Consume Waterloo

& F&bee

Cmmunity Centm

Arts

Sunday, November 24 by Patrick W&ins Imprint stafF

T

hey call themselves a Kitchener band, but you wuuldn’t know it from the Super Cake Trio’s gig listing; until last Sunday, they’d yet to play anywhere in their hometown. They’re good enough, however, to play a bunch ofToronto shows and to find a second citizenship among the thriving musical community of London, Ontario. So when the Trio decided to rent a hall and put on their own show, they brought fellow London alumni Consume and Frizbee along. Those who braved the year’s

27

ARTS

29, 1996

a

A

first heavv snowfall to the second floor of the Old Button Factory were rewarded; there were no pseudo-alternative wannabees among this lineup. If there’s any defining attribute to the London sound, it’s the exploration of the clash between melody and dissonance (think Salmonblaster, The New Grand, Scratching Post). Consume are more of the latter-surf-pop-metal-chaos, in that order, increasing exponentially. An amped-to- I1 guitars-bassdrums lineup, a variety of plastic instruments and an evil-sounding keyboard accompanied torturous screaming lyrics, as riveting as they were deafening. Frizbee, at their best, lean more towards pop. Traces of 60’s psychadaelia haunt their sound like glowing after-images, all but lost behind a veil of noise. Their vocalist also screams, but prefers a

sofi, childlike voice reminiscent of Chuckie the Doll, and almost as menacing. With the audience’s ears still ringing, the Super CakeTrio took the stage. Like the London bands, but without most of the pop aspects, the Super Cake Trio are very good at what they do--and what they do is be very loud. More than mere noise, the Trio have a superb mastery offeedback and the occasional 1970’s metalgod rifX Extra bonus points to the Trio for having one wiid drummer. Never has one human being so resembled fiction’s greatest drumfrom the mer-Animal Muppets-as Craig. The audience was sparse, but the music was great. It would be worth the drive to London to see the locals play--or, just maybe, they’ll show up at a club near iou.

action movie, yet the action is woefully inadequate. The film sinks into the standard Star Trek drama, yet is always intcrupted by dull action scenes.The issuesraised are identical to Genemthzs: Picard fighting his personal demons to save the day, and Data struggling to become more human. Then, there’s the Borg: favorite enemies among.A&~ Gcnemtim fans. In their first three appearances, the Borg were a race of collective-minded conquererrs who assimilated both technology and people, including Captain Picard. In their final three appearanccs, the Borg began to take on

a more human tone, as they developed the concept of individuality. Fiwt Contact totally disregards that major development without justifiable reasoning. In First Contact., the Borg are returned to their war-like position, bent on destroying the Federation.It really felt as if they were reverted simply to provide a really bad enemy, and it just doesn’t work. Even the presence of the Borg Queen doesn’t justi+ ignoring that much. As a first solo eKort for the Next Gerzeration cast, First Uuntactwasn’t bdd, but will hopefully provide a learning opportunity for the writers.

Buffet Salad Bar: Monday to Thursday .*. $2.99

Paella Eve& Thursday Sushi & Karaoke Bar, .=m . . . Every Friday Live Music Every Saturday n

n n

l

185 King Street, W., KITCHENER

576-l 788


28

ARTS

IMPRINT,

Friday,

November

29, 1996

Clodhoppers Gluele w/Salmonb lpaster, Shannon Lyon Pop Explosion !%hirday,

Fed Hall November 23

by Debbra McClintock special to Imprint

F

Hall m&es a small crowd appear even smaller. The intimacy ofthis show, however, was just one of its pleasures. Salrnonblaster, currently deemed London’s fastest-rising band, indulged in heavy renditions oftheir album Transitors and Twbims in a tight flurry. The trancing guitardriven hum pleased dedicated foled

lowers, and may have even recruited new fans-you just have to like deafening volumes and manic screams to appreciate it. As the following act,the Shannon Lyon Pop Explosion was a light rtslief. Being a veteran of their shows, I am happy to report their progress as stage performers. Having already proven the band’s

talent

with

two

full length

albums, these “rockers” project notable quality on stage but invest little in stage presence. Saturday night’s show was a progressive break from this as Shannon pulled OK several Pete Townsend moves and an extendamix of Mod’s Rule-with atti-

tude. & K-W favourites (with a

“VIOLENT, SEXY, romantic, hilarious and always intriguing!” - Ma&an’s

Magazine

- John Conxwan,

KCAL-IV

video released for “Mods Rule”), they whipped their usual crowd into a frolicking mass of juvenile bliss. For some unclear reason, the audience seemed to shrink even fixther for Glueleg’s pcrformansc. Perhaps it had something to do with bus schedules, but whatever the case, Glueleg managed to excel regardless. With occasional remarks such as “Jump up! Jump up

mothcrfuckers, lets go!” and “It’s like you’ve been studying all’dav or Something,” they managed tb warm up the remaining audience. New, harder rocking songs were wheeled off in the absence of the stand-up bass and trumpet that made them so unique. Glueleg has let go of the funkier jazz undertones that made them so fresh in a guitar laden world. Nonetheless, their adjusted style

continues

to produce

high

quality, pulse-racing tunes with an edge. Perhaps the audience came off as hesitant due to the unfamiliar pieces from the up-

and-coming C/%,~O~~P album. Sharing a spot on Liquid Records with Salmonblaster, the new release is expected in February. The show ended with a three-song encore only after pathetic pleas from the enthusiastic few not ready to go home yet.

Considering they were competing for numbers with acts such as James Brown and Rusty, who were also in town, everyone played a highly energetic set. Overall, the line-up was a spectacular mix of talent that deserves to perform again here very soon.

a great increase in the number of p&-classical recordings in the past ten years, and they range widely. Renaissance and Baroque music was composed and performed in the New World as well, with works in Spain influenced b) African percussion as earlv as the sixteenth century. Even S;,, program host Michael admits to a fondness for the works of J.S. Bach and Telemann. There’s a benefit concert for the K-W Chamber Music Society being held on Sunday, December 8 at 8 p.m., at The Cedars, on Erb St. in Waterloo. This is a chance to hear the complete Brandenburg Concertos performed Live in a chamber setting. It’s aiso a chance to learn a little bit about the K-W Chamber Music Society. The KWCMS has for many years been bringing top quality performers to town and has it’s own music room on Young Street in Waterloo. Many of the per-

formances take place here. These shows are often digitaliy recorded and are later broadcast on ‘The World of Chamber Music’ with Uvv professor Jan Narveson host-

sot. Nov. 30 - Man. Det 2 9~10 pm.

“FINELY DETAILED AND INTENSELY MOVING,” - Gemma~ Fles,

Eye

Magazine

by Michael Loubert Snidely Melstrom special to Imprint UNDERTHE

Flhn Guides available near Turn Key Desk

&

lassical music, iike most catagories of music, covers a vast array of sounds and styles.CKMS airs several weekly programs that would fit in the broad catagorvI of ClassiCal. As always, the station tries to provide listeners with mbre than

C

6 Princess st. w waterloo 885-2950

might

be found

on mainstream

radio stations. &$i&~~~tts is an hour of medieval, renaissance and baroque music. The name of the program refers to a German picturesque novel of the seventeenth century, Much classical music programming delves no further back than the late Baroque (J.S. Bach and his contemporaries), and tends to concentrate on Mozart and the Romantics .Simplicishtws is an attempt to explore music before this period. There has been

COLOUR

,

VISION STUDY

The School of Optometry at the University of Waterloo is evaluating several colour vision tests designed for the rail industry. Individuals with abnormal co/our vision are needed to validate the tests. The experiment requires approximately 2 hours to complete. You will be compensated $10.00 for your time. If you are interested in participating or would like more information, please contact Jeff Hovis at Ext. 6768 or by Email at jhovis@sciborg.uwatertoo.ca. This project has received ethics approval from the Office of Human Research at the University of Waterloo (File#:7640).

Ill

w-

Our newest programmer of Classical music is Graham Wall. Graham hosts two programs. Classicd En@na focuses on music from the Renaissance up until Beethoven. Also included are more recent composers such as Arvo Part who works in a medieval st$e.

On Fwe Fom

Fwg Out,

Graham delves into more recent and experimental works. He is interested in works that involve new instrumentation or new roles for instruments. Numus is a local organization that brings modern works ro the city. Some Numus members are musicians themselves and Graham enjoys the chance to play their recordings, as well as those of other contemporary Canadian composers and performers. Graham admits that he simply can’t stick to one theme for vL+

long. He seesprogramming as an artistic endeavour and enjoys mixing and moving through different styles and approaches. Au of these programs are aired via 100.3 FM, CKMS.Classical Enigma -Mondays, l-2 pm Free Fmn Feq Out-Tuesdays, 6-8 p.m. World Of ChamberMti-

Jic-Tuesdays, S- 10 p.m. Sim@issimus--Wednesdays, l-2 p.m.


IMPRINT,

Friday,

November

29

ARTS

29, 1996

Melonville Madness SCTVi Behind the Scenes by Dave

Thomas

McClelland and Stewart, $24.99, 272 pages

Reel

w/ Reson

Juhnny’s RocketRoam Saturday, November 16 by Peter Lenardon Imprint staff large contingent terloo

students

of Waand alumni

ade the trip to London to see Reson open UP for London natives Keel, who were holding their CD release party at Johnny’s Rocket Room. Reson’s set sounded harder and fitller than either of the shows they have done in the SIC. This was probably a result of both the development ofthe songs and the smaller, more music-friendly venue. “One foot and one half;” “Hot Dog” and others got great reactions from the crowd, with sustained applause after their final song, “Jesus Whore.” It was a tight show for Reson despite the fact that their drum-

mer, Steve Banks had to play in front of the rest of the band because thcrc was not enough room on the stage. The small stage was no problem for Reel because they have no drurnmeror bassistasofyet. These dap, Reel does live shows with d&s, bass and keyboard played off a DAT machine. The curious thing was that Reel’s set was heavily padded with covers, . Oasis, U2, Sly Fox and some other CFNY hits were performed proficiently enough, even adding the hand movements from the Stone Temple Pilots’ video for “Big Bang Baby” to their rendition. The verdict? If they got a real drummer, real bassist and real keyboard player to add to the talented people already on stage, and sang more original stuff and less covers, Reel would be a good live show. By the way, Reson is holding their own CD release party January 23 at the Bomber.

would

form

would Live.

become Saturday

the

core

of

what Night

But any deep grumblings that felt in Tcmmto, any notion Michaels was stealing away

were

that the best in Canadian talent were difised when Thomas and school

by Mike Buehner special to Imprint

D

on’t touch that dial” In 1976, late-night television was invaded by SCTV, a little fictitious TV station which satirized not onlv television itselfbut the theatre, movies, commercials and even “sacred cows” like Bob Hope and Walter Cronkite. In his book, SCl-‘I? &hind the Scenes, Dave Thomas digs through his “archives of Melonville” in order to recapture the hilarity that surrounded the creating of a TV show each week. SC’TV actually evolved as a concept from the live Second City shows in downtown Toronto which was the testing ground for the hilarious material of performers like Dan Aykroyd and Gilda Radner. But soon their talents would catch the attention of producer Lorne Michaels and, along with John Belushi from the Chicago Second City troupe, they

friend Eugene with Andrea

Levy

teamed

up

Martin, Catherine O’Hara, John Candy, Joe Flaherty and Harold Ramis. Together they created the concept of SCTV and much to the envy*of other shows, became one of the best productions on television in terms of excellence in writing andperfbrmante . The uniqueness of this ensemble was that it could always maintain total creative control of SCI’V, largely due to their fierce loyalty to each other and their abiliky to band together against any

producer

who

might

stifle

&i/flurry of output. Yiars later, the additions of Rick Moranis, Robin Duke, Martin Sl Tony Rosato to the strengthened an alrea great series. Thomas’ strength in writing this book is that he uses lots of wackv photographs, but more importantly,

viewed as many people he could in order to cature the essence of what it meant to work on the series. When the cast was doing a parody

with

John

Candy

as a fat

Ben Hur and it wasn’t working, Harold Ramis fondly recalls “I don’t know who said it or how it evolved but suddenly John was doing Ben Hur as Curly of the Three Stooges. It was a classic”. Intertwined with the hysterical stories are vintage photographs and ones never before seen. Certainly the funniest ones are with John Candy and Thomas’s tribute to his memory is heartwarming. He recalls the live Second City shows with Candy; ‘Whenever I went out there with John, the audience was immediately with us because they instantly liked him. They gravitated toward him.” It is for this reason that viewers tuned into SCTV aswell. Highly recommended.

he lets the

cast and technical crew tell their vivid memories in

their

own

.’

words.

SCTV was a total collaborative effort so it makes sense that Thomas went out and inter-

Dave Barry in Cyberspace

and there’s the making up conversations that never really happened bit. Most of the time, those jokes were kind of funny. His travel guide was great, most of his older stuff is hilarious, but (and I hesitate to say it) his humour is starting to get tired, There are some funny parts though. Having a fairly solid knowledge of computers is pretty nice, because I can perfectly understand some of the problems Dave pokes fun at, such as making

geration

bv4 Dave Barry CronJn Publishers Inc. $27.00, 215 pages

E-mail this Book The Cartoon Bank Ai@-td A. Jhopf kc. $23.50, 113 pages by Greg Picken Imprint staff

R

emember

a couple

of

years back, when there were a whole bunch of bad movies about how scan’ computers are? Hackers? The *Net? Viv tzmity? Juhnny Mnemonic? Well, that crap is now starting to make its wav* into the literary world, as more and more books are being written, exposing the f<libles o? the computer industry. Dave Barry has always been one of my favourite writers. Sure, he may lack the in depth wit and insight of Mencken, as some people are so quick to point out, but for those of us who don’t count ourselves among the pretentious, intellectual bY* Barry’s

elite,

he’s

kind

of

latest effort takes him computer world. Now, anyone familiar with Dave Barry’s into

writing

the

knows

that

he really

has

very few jokes in his repertoire. There’s the humorous list where he throws in things that don’t belong, there’s the gross exag-

things

look fancy with word

proc-

essors and the general unusability of Windows 95 in some situations. However, it trails off at some points, losing its way and sense of humour. The Cartom Bank is apparently a collective of cartoonists whose work has appeared in the Nav Twker and other magazines

and newspapers. That’s nice, but it doesn’t make this book at all funny* There are one hundred cartoons in this book, and I’m going to do you a f&our. Look at the cartoon. Laugh at it. Now, don’t bother buying the book. This was the of&y funnv cartoon in E-mail this book! (A f&t verified bv three different I;eople) . Now,

you dqYt

have to bu)

It. Unless you want the CD-ROM which contains all the cartoons as computer graphics you can e-mail to your friends. That is, if you want them to hate you. I suppose that once yuppies really started getting into computers, books like Dave Bnrry Z’N Cyberspaceand E-mail this bookare the inevitable result. Oh well, could don’t

be worse.

No,

think it could.

actually,

I

-

Generation X anniversarycontest!

T

celebrate their second anniversary, Generation X Video & Media present the Nova Scotia to Toronto road movie, Gtin’ Down The fiu.4, at 7 p.m. Tuesday, Dec. 3 at the Princess Cinema, 6 Princess St. West, Waterloo. Generation X, located at 69 Regina St. North, Waterloo (right behind Ethel’s Lounge) carries K- Ws best selection of foreign, cult, anime, and hard-to-find videos, as well as lots of really cool other stti including magazines and movie merchandise. Owners Mike Greaves and Floyd Chan chose their anniversary presentation carefully. ‘This classic Canadian movie is not available on video,” Greaves says. “If our customers can’t rent it, the least we can do is show it at the Princess Cinema. It’s probably the best Anglo-Canadian movie ever made.” Generation X is also celebrating by offering $1 rentals on Sunday, Dec. 1, and theRumble in theBronx special. Starting Dec. 3, the first 50 people to purchase a Gen X connoisseur card (12 rentals for the price of 9) will receive a copy-of martial arts superstar Jackie Chan’s&Pnble in theBronx for free! Anyway, if you want to win one of five pairs of free tickets

to

Goin’

Down

The

Road, come down and tell someone

to Imprint from the

Arts Dept.

or Patrick)

(James

large, inflated Japanese monster sits by the door in Generation X. It’s exactly

just

what

t-hat easy!


ARTS

30

IMPRINT,

Friday,

November

29, 1996

Women! the

Cosi Fan Tutte cmtm in square Wednesday, December 4 by Patrick Imprint

W&ins staff

osi Fan T&e, in English, means “All Women are Like That.” Like what? Like easily manipulated, flirtatious, cheating-hearted weaker vessels, according to Mozart. Then again, that was only the eighteenth century, and political correctness had yet to catch on. Imprint spoke with Sally Dibblee, who appears in the Kitchener-Waterloo Opera’s Wednesday performance, about the problems of bringing Mozart into the twentieth century. Dibblee plays Despina, the upstart servant who is enlisted to helptwo young officers, Ferrando and Guglieho, test their mistresses’ loyalty. At the encouragement of philosopher Don Alfonso, the offrcers disguise themselves and attempt to seducethe other’s woman in an elaborate and hilarious romantic comedy of errors. As Despina, Dibblee is the

C

I

VOLUNTEERS

Alrheimers Society needs reliable volunteers for upcoming “Walk for Memoires” Jan. 26 ‘97. Please call Janelle 8 742-l 422. Wanted: energetic, enthusiastic young women to be Spark, Brownie, Girl Guide or Pathfinder leaders. Within the university vicinity. For info call Lynne at 884-

_

Volunteer driving farce: do you have a car and some free time? Drivers needed to drive seniors from their home to a senior day program. Mileage is reimbursed. Contact Volunteer Services 888-8488. Volunteers needed to assist with answering phone, typing and customer service in a busy office environment. Requires at least a one year commitment. Contact Volunteer Services 8888488. Waterloo Oxford District Secondary School in Baden is looking for volunteers to help out with Special Ed Department. Excellent experience for students wanting to go to Teachers College or Social Service field. Contact Bill Bond at 634-5441 between 8100 am & 4:OO pm. Volunteers needed to work with preschool children in child care settings. No previous experience with children required. 2-3 hours per week. Great experience, call Bill at Notre Dame of St. Agatha Preschool Support Service 7411122. Lexington Public School is looking for enthusiastic volunteers to work with students in classrooms, in small groups or

LMozartian servant, smarter her masters and full of opinions, mainly about “menwhether or not men are faithful, ,a”d how many men one should have.” In The Ma&c Fhte, Mozart’s message was “never trust a woman,” and some might see Cosi Fan Tutte as similarly misogynistic. “A lot ofwomen have a hard time plaving the roles,” Dibblee says. ’ Director Sandra Bernhard has decided to play things a litte more evenly for this year’s performance. The scene is set a hundred years into the passt,in the Victorian Age where women were just beginning to exercise their own power. Dibblee adds that Bernhard directs so that the men and the women alike are seen to be subject to the same understandable faults. It’s a Mozartian ciassic for the 9Os, and the K-W Opera has yet to hit a sour note. Raffl Armenian directs the music, and the words are in Italian, with convenient English supertitles. Cmi Fun Tutte runs for one day only, Wednesday, December 4 at The Centre in the Square. typical than

on an individual basis. Call Brigitta at 747-3314 if you are interested. Kitchener Parks and Recreation - for info regarding the follpwing call Deb 741-2226: Exploring Leisure Volunteers needed! If you are available Friday evenings between 7 and 10 pm, you could assist a group of adults with a disability to “explore leisure.” This might include going to a hockey game, learning a new craft or going swimming. Admission to recreation events is provided for volunteers. Get in the Swim! Aquatic volunteers needed for men, women and children with disabilities. Will adapt to your schedule. Receive free pool pass. Male volunteers are urgently needed. Calling all Card Sharks! Male volunteer required for weekly card game with young gentleman. Time/location flexible. Like music, playing pool, conversation? Male volunteer sought to accompany young adult to community drop-in program, Sundays 1 to 3 pm. (day and time flexible) URGENTLY NEEDED! Male volunteer to assist young boy new to community in soccer program, Wednesday evenings from 6 to 8 p.m., November to March. Learn about a different culture while you show a new immigrant how to be a part of our community. For more information, call the K-W YMCA Host Program at 579-9622. Make a difference in a child’s life! Friends, a service of Canadian Mental Health Association Waterloo Regional Branch, is seeking volunteers to support children one-to-one to develop their self esteem and social skills. Call 744-4806 ext. 335.

DON’T KNOW WHAT’S GOING ON? TNNKING OF GOING TO A CLL&, OR MAY6E CATCMNG A FLICK, 6LiT DON’T KNOW WdLRE TO LOOK?.

Your worries are over! Imprint Arts Online has all the answers. Club and movie listings, and just about anything else we know about that’s going on in K-W in the near fiture. Check it out=

Artists & Writers: The Waterloo Community Arts Centre needs you. Volunteers wanted to sit on programming committee, organize drop-in artist sessions, design posters and more. Call 886-4577 City of Waterloo Volunteer Services needsvolunteers. Call 886-6488formore info regarding the following positions; Aquatic: to assist with Red Cross swimming classes for Winter i997. Volunteers must have completed RLSSC Bronze Medallion and be at least 14 years of age. Sessions begin Jan. 6 to Mar. 9. Office Assistants: answering all Home Support phone calls, typing and customer service in a busy office environment. You must have office experience, be able to type accurately and have good communication skills. Computer skills are an asset. One year commitment, Mondays from 1 to 4:30 p.m. Library: to assist individuals with special needs in selecting reading material and delivering books to their home, as well as return previously borrowed material. Familiarity with’ Library and access to a vehicle are an asset. Waterloo Community Arts Centre Needs Volunteers. Poster design, special events, office work, programming and much more. Help your local arts community. Call 886-4577 or stop by 25 Regina St. S. Reaching Out ‘96: Volunteers needed to assist with a fundraiser/educational event in aid of a local shelter. Call Michael at 744-6507. Volunteers needed - make a new friend, learn about another culture! Help a new Canadian learn English. Two hours weekly, four month commitment. TrainKitchener-Waterloo ing provided. Multicultural Centre. Phone 745-2531.

UPCCMING EVENTS FRIDAY, NOVEMBER 29 Conference on Housing in Waterloo: Overview of Homelessness in Waterloo Region. Victoria School Centre, 25 Joseph St. Free transportation to and from. Fee child care provided. 7 - 10 om. For more info call 746-4090Pandemonium-Classic Blues & Rock N’ Roll Band. 9:30 p.m. at the Grad House. No cover charae. Stage Band Cabaret, Conrad Grebel College, Great Hall, Rm. 156,8:00 p.m. Admission $8 (Students/Seniors $5) Tickets at the door: also available at the CGA Music Office. For more info call 8850220. SATURDAY, NOVEMBER 30 Conference on Housing in Waterloo: Action Workshops. Victoria School Centre, 25 Joseph St. Free transportation to and from. Free child care provided. 12 - 6 pm. for more info call 7464090. Kocian Quartet of Prague K-W Chamber Music Society, Music Room, 57 Young Street West, Waterloo. 8 p.m. $20 (sr $15; st $12) WEDNESDAY, DECEfWER 4 Movie

Night at the Grad House

Fea-

turing Christmas Movies - $1 per person, 7 p.m. & 9 p.m. For more information call x3803. Gay and Lesbian Liberation of Waterloocoming-out discussion group. Topic: “Gender Roles” 7:30 p.m. Social follows at 9 p.m., HI-l 378. Meet old friends

and make new ones. All welcome. Details: 884-4569. THURSDAY. DECEMBER 5 Festive Christmas Music from the balconies of the Davis Centre. University Choir; Chamber Choir; Chapel Choir. 12:15 D.m. SUNDAY, DECEMBER 8 K-W Children’s Choir Christmas Concert, Highland Baptist Church, 135 Highland Road West, Kitchener. Free Admission! Donation to the Hlghland Food rpboard is r; uested. ,

Geta gad thing going.

Yourself,


1

CN-GCING 1

TUESDAYS and 4th Tuesday KW Sexual Assault Support CentreiDrop-in Group. Women sexually assuatted as teen/adult: Emmanuel United Church corner of Bridgeport and Albert. I:00 3:00 pm. Info 571-0121. Every

2nd

THURSDAYS An English Language Lab/class. Sept. to Dec. in Modern Languages from I:30 to 2:20 p.m. Students, faculty, staff and spouses welcome. For info call International Student Off ice ext. 2814. FRIDAY English Conversation Class in Needles Hall 2080. Sept. to June from 2:00 to 4:00 p.m. Students, faculty, staff and spouses welcome. For info call International Student Office at ext. 2814 SUNDAYS Emmanuel United Church Young Adults Group welcomes university students. Service IO:30 am. Social Group 7:00 pm. 22 Bridgeport Rd. (corner of Albert and Bridgeport). FASS Writers Meetings: jam fellow writers, comedians and thespians in the creation of the 35th Anniversary, FASS ‘!37 Script! This year’s theme is King Arthur. ML1 04, 7-9 p.m.

I

1

ANNOUNCEMEh’TS

St. Paul’s United College has rooms available for Winter ‘97 and Spring ‘97 terms. Please call 885-l 460 or drop by for application forms and a tour! The Faculty of Applied Health Sciences is pleased to announce the opening of the UW-CMCC Chiropractic Research Clinic in the new addition to BC Matthews Hall. Call 888-4567 ext. 5301 for an appointment. Rooms in the Village Residence are available for immediate occupancy. Inquire at the Housing Office, Village 1 or phone 888-4567 ext. 3704 or 3705 for further information on the villaaes. English as a Second Language, Secondary School Credits, and Upgrading classes for adults at St. Louis Adult Learning Centres. 75 Allen St. E. Waterloo 745-1201 or 291 Westminster Dr. N,Cambridge 650-i 250. Padania Players needs plays to perform! Any local playrights with short, witty scripts please bring them to the Imprint office. Please attach name and phone number. Attention Bluevale Alumni! BCl’s 25th Reunion is May 30 - June i/97. The Reunion commlttee is presently compiling a mailing list. It is important that they receive your address now. Please write the school c/o 25th Reunion, 80 Bluevale St. N. Waterloo, N2J 3R5, call the Hotline at 650-0569 or email at http:/www.sentex.net/ -dabrykys/bci.reunion. Distinguished Teacher Awards To nominate your outstanding professor, demonstrator or teaching assistant for the Distinguised Teacher Award, contact TRACE, MC 4055, Ext. 3132 Deadline: Feb,7/97 The FASS Fall Kick-off! The fun starts now as we write the script, design the sets and plan the parties for our annual Musical Comedy in February. DC1 301, 7:30 p.m. http:// math.uwaterloo.ca\-fass The Depressive

& Manic-Depressive

Association for Waterloo Region is a self-help, support group. We provide info, education & support to anyone who has the illness as well as family members and friends. For info call 8845455. University of Library Electronic Data Services has revised office hours and added some service effective Oct. 15/

96. The new office hours (Porter Library Room 222) are: Tues. IO:30 a.m. - 12:30 p.m.; Wed. 3:30 p.m. - 4:30 p.m. Please contact the UMD Library @ x2795 for specific times. Lantern Light tours at Doon Heritage Crossroads. Tickets are now on sale for Dec. 6,7, 13,14,20 and 21 at 7 pm or 8:30 pm. Tickets are $8 per person. “Starry Night” tickets are now on sale for Dec. 23 at 6:3O - 9:30 pm. Tickets are $15 per adult and $7.50 Der child. Call 748-19t4. SNOWGA TOGA - get ready, its coming on Jan. 18 will be the-first every SNOW&& TOGA at Bingeman’s Park, $5 includes bus. Watch for ticket sales. MathSoc is collecting gifts for Operation Christmas Child. For more information contact Karen (kakopciu@ barrow) or call MathSoc at 888-4779. HUNDREDSOFFINALEXAM SURVIVAL KlTS(FESK) have been purchased by UW parents for students.Check out page 2 in this paper. “A Dickens Christmas” through song and word, put on by the Elora Festival Singers. Sunday, Dec. 8 at 3 p.m. at St. John’s Church Elora. Buy your tickets early since last years show was a sold out performance! Call 846-0331 for info and tickets. Canada World Youth past participants that are interested in foiming ‘a Waierloo regional volunteer network to-help the Ontario Regional Off ice should contact Aleisha atadhowlet@artsul .watstar.uwaterloo.ca or 7255462. Queen Elizabeth Silver Jubilee Awards Several $5,000 scholarships are being offered to undergraduate students across Canada to study at another Canadian university in their second official language (French or English). Candidates must be Canadian citizens or permanent residents, currently enrolled in the second or third year of their first undergraduate university program. Students must have sufficient ability in their second official Iangauge. Application Deadline: Jan.31 /97. For more info and application forms, contact Student Awards Office. Renison College has openings available for female students in the Winter Term 1997. For further information, please contact the Residence Office, Renison Colleae at 884-4404. ext. 611. Designing Learning Activities with lnteractive Multimedia. Course Announcement - Winter’97 - Independent Studies 301 A. A project course, in which teams of students work with faculty to design new learning activities using interactive multimedia. Details: http://watservl .uwaterloo.ca/ -tcarev/is301 a.html Breastfeeding Support Site Opens in Sears, Fairview Park Mall, December 1 ‘96. Professional and volunteer suppor hours are: Mondays 9:30 - 11:30 a.m.; Wednesdays 1 - 3:30 p.m.; Thursdays 6 9 p.m.m. Exchanges to France or Germany for 1997-98: awards of $1,200 to undergraduates and graduates. Deadline January 1O/ 97. Forms available from your dept. or Rehana Merali, NH, room 3015.

I

SCHCIARSIWS

Applications for the following scholarships are being accepted during the Fall term. Refer to Section 4 of the Undergraduate Calendar for further criteria. Application forms are available in the Student Awards Office, 2nd Floor, Needles Hall.

ALL

FACULTIES:

Doreen Brisbin Award-interested females entering 4th year in Spring or Fall 1997 in an Honours program in which women are currently under-represented. Deadline:Apr.30/97 Don Hayes Award-for involvement/contribution to athletics and/or sports therapy. Deadline:Jan. 31/97 Leeds-Waterloo Student

Exchange Program Award-students to contact John Medley, Mechanical Engineering. Mike Moser Memorial Award-available to 3rd or 4th year based on extracurricular and financial need. Deadtine: Jan. IO/97 Tom York Memorial Award-available to ail for short fiction-not essays. Students to

contact St. Paul’s United College for further information. Deadline: Dec. 31/ 96

Faculty

of Applied Sciences:

lSAT-MCAT-GMAT-GRE on campus PREP! Flexible formats including weekends for $195. Instant info: prep@istar.ca or http:// www.prep.com. Richardson - Since 1979 - 1-800-410-PREP.

Health

Mark Forster Memorial Scholarshipavailable to 3rd or 4th year Kinesiology. Deadline: Jan. 31/97 Michael Gellner Memorial Scholarshipavailable to 3B Kinesiology or Health Studies. Deadline: Mar. 31/97 Robert Haworth Scholarship-completion of 3rd year in an honours program in resource management related to Park Planningand Management, Recreation, Natural Heritage or Outdoor Recreation. Deadline: May 31/97 RAWCO-available to2nd,3rdor4th year Recreation and Leisure Studies. Deadline: Jan 31/97

Faculty

Models and actors needed by agency for local, Toronto and international representation. Skills workshops available. For an appointment call ‘The Look’ Company. 743-6550.

0 eA l 86 Davtona

Turbo 5s~. 82,000 km. Black, leather interior, SR. PW/ PL. $5,990 certified, 621-l 336.

Excellent Accommodation, dignifiedsetting, mature student. Close U.W.O. - Masonville. Nicely furnished room or apt. (shared kitchenette). Parking, (recreation) ping pong, cable. Bedding & linen supplied. 1609 Richmond, 438-7615. Sublet Winter. 1 room available. Quiet neighborhood. Free parking. 15 minutes to UW. $280 per month. 888-6817.

of Arts:

Concordia Club Award-available to 3rd year Regular or 3A Co-op Germanic & Slavic. Deadline: Jan. 31197

Faculty

of Enaineerina:

Andersen Consulting Scholarshipavailable to 3B. Deadline: Mar. 31/97 Canadian Hospital EngineeringSociety’s Scholarship-available to 3B. Deadline: Mar. 31/97 Consulting Engineers of Ontario Scholarship-available to all 38. Deadline: Mar. 31/97 John Deere Limited Scholarship-available to 3B Mechanical. Deadline: Mar. 31197 Delcan Scholarship-avallable to 4A Civil. Deadline: Feb. 28197 Randy Duxbury Memorial Award-available to 38 Chemical. Deadline: Mar. 31/ 97 S.C. Johnson & Son Ltd.Environmental Scholarship-available to 3rd year Chemical. Deadline: May 31/97 Ontario Professional Engineers Foundation Undergraduate Scholarshipavailable to all 2B & 36 based on extracurricular and marks. Deadline: Nov. 29/96 Marcel Pequegnat Scholarship-available to 38 CiviI,Water Resource Management students. Deadline: May 31/ 97

Facultv

$EEconmental .

Shelley Ellisozl Award-available to 3rd year Planning. Deadline: Nov. 29/96 Robert Haworth Scholarship-available to 38 Park Planning and Management, Recreation, Natural Heritage and Planning. Outdoor Education. DeadlIne: May 31197 Marcel Pequegnat Scholarship-available to 3rd year Environment & Resource Studies, Planning, Water Resource Mgt. Deadline: May 31/97

Facultv

of Mathematics:

Andersen Consulting Scholarshipavailable to 36 Math. Deadline: Mar. 31/ 97 Electrohome 75th AnniversaryScholarship-available to 3B Computer Science. Deadline: Mar. 31/97 K.C. lee Computer Science Scholarship-available to 28 Computer Science. Deadline: Nov. 29/96 Sun Life of Canada Award-available to 2nd year Actuarial Science. Deadline: Nov. 29/96

Facultv

of Science:

Memorial Award in Geology-available to 2A Earth Science, see department. S.C. Johnson &Son Ltd. Environmental Scholarship-available to 3rd year Chemistry. Deadline: May 31/97 Marcel Pequegnat Scholarship-available to 38 Earth Science/Water Resource Mgt. Deadline: May 31197 David

M. Forget

0

Peace. Jov. Love to all this Christmas Season. Troubled possible p;e’gnancy? Call a friend at Birthright. 579-3998.

bv a ’

Too busy? Christmas baking available. A variety of cakes, cookies and pies. Drop off on campus. Call 653-3755. Wordprocessing, editing by experienced freelance writer and language teacher. Anytime, student rates. 748-2838.

Spring Break Canada’s Premier Student Travel Co! Party In CANCUN for as little as $399!!!! Find out how to go for FREE & earn EXTRA CASH!!! Call 800/ 798-l 509 MONTREAL for NEW YEARS ‘97, two nights 4-star hotel1luxer-y bus transportation. Only $129. Other trips available. Greg or Paul 7468422. Reg. #04366530.

DEADllNEFORClASSlFlEDS isMondaysat 5 p+m,at the IMPRINTofficeSK 1116

CLASSIFIED RATES: studentrates: $3.120 wards/.15$ after 20/t GST non-student: $5.120 wards/.25$ after 20/t GST business (student,non-student):$I O./Z0 wards/.25$ after 20/t GST

SWDENTEMPLOYMENT OPPORnMllTlES The following employment applicants should respond

opportunities are now available. directly to the contact indicated.

Interested

Projectionist & Camera OperatorsAudio Visual Centre $9.00/hr. Ftexible hours. Preference given to students with 4 terms to work. Contact Lenora Wilson at Ext. 5114 or repot-t to the Audio Visual Centre Eng 2 1309. Waterloo Taxi Research In Motion Phone Tech CBC Communications UW Optometry Upper Canada Casiono Canadian College of Naturopathic Medication Generation X Media Travel Cuts Revolution Onward Computers Cadisys Princess Cinema The Beat Goes On

Fair-view Acura Data Corn Dr. Disc Blue Dog Bagels Federation of Students Uranus Computers Waterloo North Mazda \/icinn P *m*l Y 131”I 1 ““I I ,pcr yters Health Keep ler Digital Extren nes Sybase Strand Trace A.H.S. Society



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