1997-98_v20,n08_Imprint by Editor Imprint

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Learning by Rob Van Imprint

Kruistum staf!f

student assets (cash, stocks, bonds, cars, etc.) worth more than $S,OOO and RSPs now count in assessing financial need l students must take at least 60 per cent of a full-time course load to qualify l students must pass at least 60 per cent of their course load to demonstrate academic progress and remain eligible for financial assistance l allowance for living costs will be increased and parental contribution amount will be reduced Charlene Shaw, Student Financial Aid Coordinator at Needles Hall, said that “a lot of the changes are good, for example the parental contribution amount has gone down,” but remains concerned over the reduction of the student earning allowance. Some ofthesechanges have been questioned by the Ontario Association for Student Financial Aid Administrators (OASFAA). They were concerned about some of the strict guidelines that were to be enforced under the original policy. Some of their concerns have been addressed. Under the previous guidelines,

he Ontario government has just implemented its new OSAP program for the 1997198 school year. Spokespersons from university, college and student groups argue that it will be harder for some students, especially those in part-time studies, to attend school and complete post-secondary education. Provincial ministry officials, however, say that there will be no negative impact on access and retention. They argue that Ontario is only adopting the same criteria for assessing financial need as were introduced two years ago under the Canada Student Loan Program and are used in almost every other provincial loan plan. It is a late move to harmonize with 1995 changes to the federal loan program. The key changes to OSAP include: + student earnings from all sources in excess of $600 will affect the amount of loan that students are eligible for

August

by Dewey Oxberger special to Imprint

OSAP rules, Summer News

Fundraising Roundup,

Forum opinions,

- page 12

Adult entertainment business ventures

Science and Technobgy page 15 Selecting

courses, Hamburgers

Buying computers, of Death

Features History

uring a recent tour of Southwestern Ontario, Canadian Alliance of Student Associations (CASA) National Director Hoops Harrison took a few moments for an interview with Imprint. Harrison’s main goal is to lay the foundation down for Parliament co legislate a National Education Act, which would guarantee “Pan-Canadian standards of quality and accessibility.” The immediate pressure is not to set the standards. Rather Harrison says it is, “to develop the measurement standards” which will allow for cross-province comparisons. Although this idea has “been thrown around for years,” CASA will be the first major group to hake a “major push” for such legislation. Presumably, provinces (or even individual universities) deficient in quality would no longer be accessible to federal support. Another area that will require a great deal of work over the next year is lobbying

blitz, Recycling

page

of Imprint, Treeplanting, Neis-Paganism

UCV Sports

- page 33

Preview, year, NFL

Arts

Campus Preview

Pas

by Rob Van Imprint

Ret this

Radiohead, Tristan Psionic, Three Big Bangs, Contact, Sarah McLachlan

when assessing for OSAP eligibility the amount the student had to have saved was based on their living at home. Now students can appeal their award amount if they lived away from home. Students who are trying to find out about the status of their OSAP loan can use the OSAP website at www.osap.on.gov.ca or call l-900~565OSAP for $2 per call. If students have a smaller financial

by Rob Van Kruistum

need they are encouraged to apply for the Ontario Work Study Program or for bursaries. Work study is a system of jobs thar are given to qualified students who have demonstrated financial need. Students can earn up to$l ,ooO per term. Bursaries are awarded based on financial need and generally provide up to $500 per term. ShawwarnsstudencstoapplyforOSAP before the deadline of September 30.

for improved student aid. Human Resources Development Canada is currently looking at thirteen new types of financial assistance for students. CASA is pushing for a combination of up-front grants (non-repayable assistance given when you pay cuicion, for example), deferred grants (a certain amount of debt forgiven upon programme completion), and debt remission (where they forgive students with a debtload over a certain amount}. CASA has thirteen member schools across the country, including the UniversityofWaterloo. Harrisonseesmajorgrowth soon, anticipating that in two years there will be twenty schools, making CASA by far the largest university student organization in Canada. Schools committed to pursuing membership this year include the University College of Cape Breton, Mount Royal College, and the University of Lethbridge, with a combined enrolment of more than 20,000 students. They have addressed past concerns

about schools perpetually attending without joining through the creation of an “Associate Member” category. Schools interested in membership who are not ready to commit may pay 114 normal fees for a year. The next year, to continue as Associate Members, they must pay l/Z normal fees. The third year of associate membership requires 3/4 normal fees, and in the fourth year, schools must commit to full membership. Harrison was unable to comment on Pat Fitzpatrick’s court case. Fitzpatrick allegedly embezzled money from the Canadian Alliance of Student Associations several years, ago, and is also accused of fraud. The case will appear before the courts in September. Harrison acknowledged that several years ago this incident cost CASA some credibility, but was quick to note that the Fitzpatrick situation is, “a non-issue.” The resulting debt has been replaced, and new mechanisms have been developed to ensure such problems cannot reoccur.

Villagers raise$28K for charity

sports

photo

CASA pushes for National EducationAct

29,1997

News - page

Behold your fate!

Setting national standards

r In Print ’ Friday,

the OSAP ropes

Kruistum staff

ver the past school year, over 2,000 UW students from both Village 1 and the Ron Eydt Village have raised more than $28,000 for the Waterloo Regional Chapter of the Multiple Sclerosis Society. For the fifth year, the SO or so Dons have coordinated the fund-raising effort, which includes a raffle, bottle drive and the

annual Village Charity Ball held in the Fall term. The efforts of the Dons has led to the students raising $28,068.80 for the MS Society, which provides support and assistance for those with the disease. The

project

not only

helps

local chari-

ties but conveys an important message to the residents of Waterloo. “The students want to let the community know that they are more than just transients who study, go to bars and then

leave for the summer. They are part of the City of Waterloo and appreciate being a part of the community,” said Chris Read, Village 1 residence life coordinator. By working together on a common goal, the villagers also make friends and build

a sense

of community

in the

resi-

dences, he said. Although the project has traditionally been conducted during the fall and winter terms, the dons plan to expand the effort to a year-round campaign.

NEWS

Seagram UW special

Library to Imprint

he Seagram Museum of Waterloo is donating its W&volume rare book collection and its early archival collections to the University of

Museum

donates

Watcrtoo Library. The earliest of the imprints in the rare book collection is Conrad Gesner’s famous book on distillation, De Secretis Remediis aut P~tius Uz~s~u~~, printed in Zurich in 1554. The finely bound and carefully assembled collec-

tions on distillation and the beverage alcohol industry will provide resources for the study of one of the early and most we& known industries of the Waterloo area. The Seagram family papers will b@.a welcome addition to the papers of other families influential in the business, cultural and political history of this area, including the Breithaupt, Motz, Bowlby and Clement families. This gift of a portion of the Seagram Museum’s cultural properties continues the tradition of support of the university by both the Bronfmans and Seagram Co. Ltd. The tradition began in UW’s founding year with the gift of the Seagram Stadium, the university’s first permanent faciIi ty. The collections will be housed in the Doris Lewis Rare Book Room. This addition will complement the Library’s existing research collections in the fields of chemistry, chemical en-

0 P

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To be eligible, pick up a short survey from your Student Placement Office and return completed by September 17, 1997.

ROYAL BANK FINANCIAL GROUP*

29, 1997

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“Bottling of Seagram’s V.O. in Waterloo Plant, Ontario, 1928” from the archives gineering, the history of technology and social history. Among the Seagram Museum collections being dispersed after it closed earlier this year, Wilfred Laurier University will receive the prints, paintings,

of joseph

E Seagram and Sons Ltd.

lithographs and works on paper. Brock University will obtain the wine related library and artifacts. The musuem’s conservation laboratory equipment and supplies are being donated to the Waterloo Regional Curatorial Centre.

grad makes Transitions

There and

August

140 Columbia St., \N, @3io Qoc~,fe G\ub) WATERLOO 6006 74&6508

setting

Friday,

by Peter Lenardon Imprint staff

The magazine will include interviews with key individuals, updates on issues of national significance, and a focus on sharing the experiences of organizations that have developed innovative programs or novel approaches to common problems. The aim is to go beyond mere reportage of events to revealing the how and

recent University of Waterloo graduate is behind a new publication that digests the knowledge of university student leaders and administrators across the country. Transitions, “The Conference on Paper” is a magazine edi ted and published by political science graduate David R. Drewe. The magazine wit1 target members of student governments, universicyadministrators, student newspapers, think tanks and the federal and provincial government. It is an information resource written from a student perspective and dealing with news and current issues surrounding post-secondary Tducation. Trzmsitions also ;erves as communi:ation tool for memlers of student gov:rnment nationwide who meet only infreluently to share The first issue... deas in a formal conTerence setting. Since student leaders change conwhy of issues and programs af;tantly, Drewe is trying to elimifecting post-secondary educalate the need for “the wheel to tion in Canada. )e reinvented several times per Contributors to Trans&trs year” at campuses across the couninclude all of the “major players” in the area of post-second-

ary education; it is essentially written by the same sort of people who would read it. Transitions also has an advisory board composed of student leaders from across the country, including representatives from the UniversityofNew Brunswick, LJniversity of Saskatchewan, I_Jniversity of British Columbia, Laurentian University, and the University of Waterloo (Feds President Mario Bellabarba). The first issue, mailed August 14, included articles on student aid and lobbying as well as an interview with the chair of the federal Liberal Higher Education Caucus Committee, Peter Adams. The next issue is due out in September, as he is hard ac work on it in his home office in Waterloo. Mr. Drewe won a LJniversity of Waterloo Student Leadership award for his service with the Federation of Students in many capacities including Senior Officer for Academic Affairs. Drewe also spent a term as News Editor of Imprint. How to get it: Transitions will be published eight times per year at an annual subscription cost of $97.50. Transitions, c/o Penthouse, 124 King St. N., Waterloo, Onta+ e4 2X8 or NZL transitions@sympatico.ca.

NEWS

Friday, August 29, 1997

IMPRXNT,

Tax cheats beware

The Laundromat 0. (Jimmy) EleftheriadisUwner {S 19) 885-3202

Ontario clamps down on tax evasion by Jilkm special

Drage Imprint

he Ontario Ministry of Finance finally has some enlightening news. Their battle agidinst taxevasion has proven fruitful, with fines totalling$4.!,million issued in 1995 and 1996. The More than half of the fines were imposed for offenses against the Retail Tax Act. The remainder were levied under the Tobacco Tax Act, the Fuel Tax Act, the Employer Health ‘Tax Act and the Criminal Code of Canada. With the decrease in cigarette smuggling in Untario due to reduction of tobacco taxes, the Ministry of Finance has been ;.lblc to assign staff to other forms of illegal economic activity, incfuding~~ilingtarc~nitcr~llectecI sdes taxes. Audit recoveries have atso increased in the past year from $256 million in the year ending March 31, 1906 IO $317 million in the year ending March 31,1997. It is unfortunate to note that this is only the tip of the iceberg. According to the Provincilril Audi-

tor, hundreds of millions of dollars in retail sales taxes arc collected and not remitted every year, putting the burden on honest taxpayers. In attempts to reduce this problem, the 1996 and 1997 Ontario Budgets allotted for 200 new total

bill

Ministry’s Special Investigations Branch warns that convicted taxpayers can expect to pay not only fines and court surcharges, but also back-taxes, penalties and interes t. *‘The total bill can amount to three times the amount originally evaded, and the tax statutes

can

$~~~j”,c,,~~.P

auditors, investigators and collection officers, as well as temporar)l suspension of lottery privileges for store owners fdiling to remit sales taxes. “Firm and Fair enforcement of Ontario’s tax laws is essential,” said Finance Minister Ernie Eves. “Honest taxpayers have nothing to fear from it. In fact it protects their interests by ensuring that they are not saddled with someone else’s share of the burden.” Dark Savio, Director of the

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For those who have failed to comply with Ontario’s tax laws in the past, the Ministry has a Voluntary Disclosure policy which grants immunity from prosecution to those willing to

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taxes, plus interest, is required. However, to qualify for this program, the disclosure must be truly voluntary, and not prompted by the Ministry’s request to audit the taxpayers business records. In Iight of the enhanced cnforcement activity, those who have failed to comply with Ontario’s tax laws in the past would be wise to take advantage of the Voluntary Disclosure policy before the Provincial Auditor comes for a visit.

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NEWS

Friday, August 29, 1997

IMPRINT,

The summer in review Here is what you missed while you were gone Friday, Tuition

May

2, 1997

fees at UW increase

Beginning May 1, tuition fees for students in fl faculties at the 1 ‘niversity of M’acertoo will go up 3-c ten per ccnr.

‘I’he Optometry students I’ve agreed to an additional $500 fee i ncreasc. \\‘ith this, which would bc rhc first differential fee at IJW, (Iptometry students would pay $2,253 per term in cuirion fees.

New spokesperson for student organization The Canadian Student Associations,

Alliance ofwhich

of the

University of Waterloo is a member, has selected Richard Hoops Harrison as its new National Director. Elarrison will replace Matthew Hough, who was elected to the position iast year. C:ASA, now in its third year of operation is an alliance of thirteen student associations rcprcscnti ng approximately 120,000 of Car&a’s postxcondary scudcnts. The hedd offkc, locared in Ottawa, is run by the National I>irector, who acts as UI official spokespcrxm and CItlicf E;,xt-cutivc Officer, the General Illanager (a position which recently reptaced the Research Coordinator) and rho Administrative Assistant. Friday,

May

16, 1997

Loan rules tightened Ontario has recently tightened the rules for its $55@million loan program. The new system will shift more of the load onto students. Bonnie Patterson, president of the Council of Ontario IJniversi&i, sent a letter to Veronica Laccy, Ontario Deputy Minister of Education, expressing her frus-

tration over the lack of consultation on decisions that could erode the governmen t’s stated commitment to accessible, affordable post-secondary education. “It is surprising to me that as our society and governments reaffirm the need to support life-long learning, policy changes that impede such a pursuit could be introduced,” she wrote. Friday,

Election

May

30, 1997

hopefuls square off at ML

Federal election hopefuls debated in the Theater of the Arts on Thursday, Map 22. The Liberal incumbent Andrew Telegdi squared off against candidates from theNDP, The Reform Party and the Progressive Conservatives as well as Monte Dennis from the Canadian Action Party, and Helmut Braun from the Marxist-Leninist Party. Afteropeningstatements, the floor was opened to questions from the audience, which varied in focus from access to post-secondary education to a question on commuter train service asked by one of the directors of WPIRG.

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amend the proposed Bill 96, the Tenant Protection Act. Larry Skoog, a lawyer with the Waterloo Region Community Legal Services, raised concerns that the Bill will allowunf%r evictions. With the proposed law, landlords will be able to evict without written “notice Eo terminate” and then keep or throw out tenants’ possessions following the eviction. The new legislation u~outd aItowland!ords to raise rents above the rent control limit - ctrrrcntl?x 2.8 Ixrcent - once someone moves out of an existing apartment. For students, the possil>itit) of rising rental rates is a strong possibility and imminent threat.

New Vice-President, Student Issues On Sunday, May 25, Student’s Council, the governing body of the Federation of Students, voted unanimously in favour of making the part time Student Issues Resource Coordinator position a full time Vice-l’resident position, and to appoint Heather Catder to that office. Catder, who has been SIKC Coordinator for over a year and is now Vice-President Student Tssues, cannot vote at Student’s Council as she was not elected, but has input into the budget and strategic planning of the Federation of Students, Friday,

Tenants’

June

UW first with propane power

27, 1997

rights in danger

A team of engineering students from the IJniversity of Waterloo won the pickup division title in this year’s Propane Vehicle Challenge in the [J.S. Advanced vehicle technology was featured at this, the second annual competition, held this year in Texas. Seventeen schools from

On June 24, approximately 120 tenants from K-W gathered at the Victoria School Centre in Kitchener for a public meeting organized by the Waterloo Region Tenants Coalition. They gathered to voice their concerns over the refusal of Minister of Housing Al Leach to

continued

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IMPRINT,

Friday,

August

29, 1997

Summer news page 6

Friday,

Canada, the U.S. and Puerto Rico competed in the event. Resides placing first in the overall division, UW’s entry earned first in the lowest emissions category. The team was also named the best new team and shared the best oral presentation award with the University of California at Riverside.

Placement

continued

from

Friday,

July

Train tracks

11, 1997 get

traffic

This is a warning: look both ways before crossing the railway tracks that run along the east side of the campus. Why? Because the track is about to get a lot busier. Perhaps as early as this weekend, the Waterloo-St. Jacobs train will begin ferrying passengers from uptown Waterloo to the town of St. Jacobs and the St. JacobsFarmer’s Market.

Canada

Day a blast

The 1 JWCanada Day celebrations held at Columbia Lake Park on July 1 attracted an estimated 3,OOO people last Tuesday.

Martian invasion - NASA lands first explorer on the Red Planet ‘l’hc second stage of the exploration of Mars began shortly after 1 p.m. EDT on July 3 as Pathfinder landed on the surface of the Red I%net. The irlrst rmages transmitted showed a rock strewn surface similar to those sent by the Viking landers 21 years ago. The biggest surprise was that the rocks were much iarger than expected. Their size suggested to the scientists that this mav , have been a glacial area, due to the similarity to glacial regions on Earth.

July

25,1997

results

are in

The Co-op statistics for the May to August work term placements are now out, with the rather impressive numbers always posted by Career Services. Overall employment figures amount to a 93.94 per cent placement rate for the term. Of course, this number includes only those students who did not find work through other means. The number of students who either returned to their last employer or found their own employment amounted to close to 1,000 of the 2,800 students who are to go on work terms this fall. The overall employment figure of 93.94 per cent is down slightly from fast year’s figure of 94.35 per cent, This has been reported to be a result of the fact that there were 200 more students looking for jobs this term than last year. The department report also shows that there were 500 more jobs offered this year than in the same term last year. Why 200 more students and 500 more jobs leads to a slightly lower employment rate is unclear.

Food bank gets boost: Anonymous donation greatly appreciated On Wednesday, July 23, the FEDS Food Bank received an anonymous donation of over $300 worth of food. Jason Rochon, this term’s Food Bank Coordinator, said “this couldn’t have come at a better time.”

Professors

get 1 per cent raise

Under an agreement day, June 27, UW professors scale salary increase of one with UW’s non-union staff of one per cent from May

signed on Friare getting a per cent in line salary increase 1.

Imprint workshops Friday, September 5 1:30 & 2:30 Both tutorials

PageMaker 6.0: Layout

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NEWS

IMPRINT,

Friday,

August

29, 1997

‘RecycleCyclesto new location by Matt Feldman Imprint staff

ver the course of four years, WPIRG’s Recycle Cycles project has saved over 400 bikes from what would have been a landfill fate. Now in their new Iocation at 3222 King St E. Kitchener in the rear of the building, the volunteer group will continue their work refurbishing old bicycles, providing space for the public to fix their own bikes and returning the finished products to the community at low cost, Recycle Cycles makes it clear they are not a bike store. Every Sunday from 2 to5 p.m+, the shop’s Community Bike Repair Day, volunteers there will assist you in fixing adult’s and children’s bicycles, not fix them for you. In exchange for this service and the use of their facilities, Recycle Cycles asks that for every hour you spend on Sunday repairing your own bike, you volunteer one hour of your own time to assist others, or make a fmancial contribution of at least $3 per hour, in addition to the cost of parts. Making affordable bicycles

available to lower income members of the community is one of Recycle Cycles’ prime goals, and it appears as though they’re on the right track. Bikes that have already been refurbished are provided to lower income community members for a monetary donation ranging from $5 to $40, promoting cycling as a transportation alternative open to everyone. Environmentzzl benefits also make this project successful. Using bikes in favor of fossil fuel-dependant transportation reduces the strain on the environment. Gearing Reusing bikes prevents them from clogging landfiils and donating y&r time and old bikes recycles them for continued use by people in need. If you have a bike you won’t be usingor repairing yourself, Recycle Cycles welcomes donations. Your tax deductible contribution helps them to help the community.

at the new location. photo

by Peter

Lenarclon

Volunteers are welcome to work on bikes on Tuesdays and Wednesdays from 5 - 8 p.m. and Saturdays from 2 - 5 p.m. The public is welcome tovisit the shop, in the basement at the rear of the building at 322 King Street East, to fix or purchase bikes on Sundays from 2 - 5 p.m.

World in Review

w-w

IMMIGRATION SERVICES

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Africa - The United Nation’s refugee agency fears a new eruption of violence in Africa’s Great Lakes region following reports of continued killing of Rwandan Hutu refugees and a massacre of Tut&, A recent attack on Mudende camp in Rwanda by Hutu gangs resulted in 148 deaths, mostly Tutsi refugees. Most were hacked to death with machetes. Canada - A new system of charity casinos in Ontario is expected to generate one billion dollars. Of this-$820-million will go to the Ontario government and the remainder, $180-million will go to the charities. Liberal critic James Bradley complained that “the government

can always look good by trying to help the charities out. But in reality it is the government that is getting the big take...They want to fill their coffers and the charities are only a front for that. Cuba - Canada donated $3.5 million worth of edible cooking oil to Cuba Tuesday to help ease the food shortages on the Communist-ruled island. Canada has emerged as one of Cuba’s most important trade and investment partners by adopting a “constructive engagement” policy toward the government of President Fidel Castro. Sweden called

facts”

- A Swedish politician for a probe into “terrifying showing that up to 60,000

Swedish women were sterilized against their will over a 40 year period from 1935 to 1976. Most of the victims wcrc “inferior” or of “poor or mixed racial quality,” meaning prople with learning disabilities, from poor families or who were not of the common and approved Nordic blood stock. United States - A jewelry company used photos of its executives posing with President Bill Clinton to help defraud 15,000 people of almost $40-million in a pyramid scheme. The executives fled overseas before the collapse of the fraud which is reported to be one of the costliest credit-card scams in U.S. history.

IMPRINT,

Friday,

August

NEWS

29, 1997

‘cDOdt Trash CanP campaign pops Region of Waterloo and CSR push to increase can recycling by Paul Rencoret special to Imprint

he Region of Waterloo and the Corporations Supporting Recycling (CSR) have recently began a recycling campaign, en ti tied “Don’t Trash Cans!,” with the purpose of increasing the current amount of aluminum cans being recycled in Waterloo. Aluminum is the most valuable material in the “Blue Box” and apartment recycling program in this city. Aluminum cans represent only about two per cent by weight of the materials collected, but they contribute over 40 per cent of revenues The Region of Waterloo receives from all recyclables that are sold. “Right now aluminum cans are the primary engines driving the revenue base of municipal recycling programs, but they could be even more important to the sysrem,” says CSR President and CEO Damian Bassett. The main problem is that most pop cans actually end up in the garbage can rather than in the recycling box. “It happens when people trash them into the garbage on the street and in parks because they can’t find a recycling bin,” adds Bassett* “We want every one of those cans back because, collectively, they can make a big difference in earning more revenues for our recycling programs. We want every single can back to build strong recycling

These cans are so money! programs in Ontario,” says Bassett. In this campaign CSR is contributing $63,000 and the Waterloo Region is contributing $15,000. Presently, the ‘*Don’t Trash Cans!” campaign headline is being featured in newspaper ads, outdoor advertising and radio commercials that will continue running throughout the summer and fall. However, the main purpose of the

photo by Rob Van Kruistum campaign is to increase can recycling permanently. “Our target in Waterloo Region is to boost the aluminum can recycling by 20 tonnes by the end of 1997. That’s about 1.2 million additional cans over what we cursays Joy Rayner, Supervirently recycle,” sor of Customer Service with the Region’s Engineering Department, Waste Management Division.

$80.00 PER TERM

Are available for $136.00 for 3 Months To get a pass you need: 1. Valid University I.D. 2. $136.00 in cash, Interac, or credit card. 3. A Kitchener Transit Photo which may be obtained for $4.00 on September lo/97 from 9:OOa.m. tp 3:00 p.m. in the Federation of Students Office. Past photos from Kitchener Transit may be used. Passes are available from the Fed Office in sLC1102 from Sept. 2 - 12 between 9:00 a.m. to 4:30 p.m. provided you already have a Kitchener Transit Photo.

Mr. Rayner says Waterloo Region is pleased to be working with CSR in this important recycling effort. Corporations Supporting Recycling is a coalition of six industry sectors that supports municipal recycling programs. It helps to fund promotion and education programs and it works with municipalities to identify and implement systems that improve program cost efficiencies. More than 130 companies belong to CSR includinggroceryand consumerproducts distributors, paper and plastic packaging manufacturers and suppliers, soft drink manufacturers and suppliers, and printing paper users. In a previous form, CSR helped to fund the launch of the original cilrbside and multi-material “Blue Box” program in municipalities throughout Ontario. Over the past 10 years, its members have contributed $45 million to help establish and expand local municipal recycling. In thecase of the “Don’t Trash Cans!” campaign, the main objectives are to maximize recycling revenues and to divert more materials from local landfill sites. The campaign will also help to increase the recovery of other materials in the recycling program. The message of the Region of \Vatcrloo and CSK is “Don’t throw your used aluminum pop cans away, ever, no matter where you are!”

PARHlING ERMITS ON SALE FOR FALL Uk WINTER TERMS

PLUS APPLICABLE TAXES AND CARD DEPOSIT* IF REQUIRED *Card depo sit is tzfundable up to 14 days afbr expiry of parking permit

PARKING IS SOLD ON A FIRST COME FIRST SERVED BASIS Telephone orders are accepted

with payment

Visa or Mastercard. Permits and parking cards will be held for pick up at the parking office. HOUR5 Monday - Friday a:00 a.m. - 9:00 pm~. Sturday 8:30 a.m. - 4:00 pm. Visit our website at http:llwww.adm.uwaterloo.ca/inforpark

NEWS

10 4/’

PRENTICE

HALL

C+WJADA

Friday, August 29, 1997

Ontario schools find

INC.

common ground

%tw~ yrourself c++ h?dm” by Jesse Liberty Sams Publishing

by Peter Lenardon Imprint staff

We FWe $28. OSEORN,E

IMPRINT,

Mon. to Fri. IO-9 ; Sat. 1 O-6 ; Sun. 12-5

n an effort to bring a unit); of voice to students, representatives from universities and colleges throughout Ontario met in Barrie this month to agree to certain principles for maintaining a quality post-secondary education system for the province. Institutions and provincial lobby groups have been at odds in the past with regard to methods of activism and the proper way to fund post-secondary education. Conference attendees focused on four main issues: student aid, funding and fees, representation on decision-making

bodies and student life. All schools present were allowed to voice their concerns on these issues to the delegation. Provincial lobby groups were invited to attend the @ening session as observers, but the focus was on developingcommon principles not specific lobbying efforts. “For years, students in Ontario have been divided,” saysJeff Gardner, Vice President Education of the Federation of Students. “Our lobby groups work differently which means students sometimes work at cross purposes when they should be united.” Those present managed to come to some broad agreements on issues such as the reformation

of student aid, the reduction of debt loads, continuation of government funding to prevent massive tuition hikes and increased representation on governing bodies within post-secondary insti tut ions. “We’ve taken a huge step,” saysGardner, “the message is that we’re going co work together, in our own ways, to make government accountable to us.” Some concessions had to be made with regard to tuition, wirh one camp pushing for a tuition freeze and other students maintaining that tuition should raise with inflation in order to maintain the quality of classes being offered.

Alumni office calls for cash by William Rowe special to Imprint

Professional

certifications

in many

disciplines

UNIVERSITY UNDERGRADUATE:

K.O.M.Consmts /

P.0 Box 60524, Mountain Hamilton, Ontario, LQC 7 Phone:

(905) 318-8200 ; Fax: (905) 318 E-Mai t: kom 63wchat.on.ca

2iekdbw~dLc~h&7--

ULL F c IRCLE FOODS

68 Queen St (at Charles) Kitchener 7444331

0’ \

ver the summer, while most students were either away on a work term or having an academic holiday, 50 Waterloo students raised over one million dollars in pledges and gifts from slose to 6000 alumni and UW parents over the phonesThis marks the third consecutive term that UW’s calling for donations program has broken the million dollar goal. “The success of the program resides with the students. Their motivation and ambition have allowed us these great achieve-

ments.” Rowe adds, “Many of our callers have raised tens of thousands of dollars. This term we had two fundraising records fall. Both the term record of $127,000 by one caller was broken as well as the lifetime total of $415,000 was topped. More importantly however, is the group effort every night which continues to be extremely high quality.” The Qfflce of Developmental and Alumni Affairs now boasts one of the best fundraising call centres in Canada, as many Universities do not call for donations over the summer and run limited phonathons in the fall and winter terms.

FedBack Once again your VP Education has been roped into doing the FedBack, I’m not complaining, though, it’s just that it gets tough to talkaboutanythingother than student loans and government blunders. Still, I’ve decided eo make a concerted effort to taik about something you all might want to read and the first thing I thought of was frosh life, It’s been a long time since I was fresh, I mean since I was actually “supposed” to be frosh. And every year as orientation kicks ineo gear I think back on those happy times. Not because of my incredible frosh week, but because of the stupid things I did in my first four months. In memory of my dopiness, which by the way is still running rampant, I wanted to discuss the basics, the stuff people honestly don’t consider when they first get here. In high school I used to carry this gym bag/suitcase that weighed a good seventy pounds

byJeff Gardner VPEducation

and had r;he power to decapitate passerby In it was every textbook I owned and moving from class to class was easy since I never had to go back to my locker. I tried much the same thing at university in those first days, until I realized thar: a walk up a flight of stairs in high school is somewhat different than an exodus across campus, The moral? Don’t take all your textbooks to the first class. Wait and see whether you actually need it. With the exception of labs and maybe theodd English class (paperbacks cause little strain) too many books in one bag will not only necessitate the purchase of a new bag, but will result in frequent trips to Health and Safety. For all you techies, this does not apply to drafting

kits and basic

science

lab

gear, since graphics labs and some of the sciences start up in the first week.

Classes sons aplenty ing your

themselves held lesIt turns out that us830

a.m.

Waterloo’s calling program runs year round, employs about 50 students a term, attempts to reach all Alumni and Parents of current UW students, and raises much needed funding for scholarships, teachingequipment, bursaries, building funds, library acquisitions as well as student managed endowment funds (WEEF, WATSEF, MEF). If you arc interested in raising money over the phones for Waterloo and being a part of our million dollar team, please drop by SCH and fill ouean application (include your resume) or contact WillRoweacexc.3129orAnthony Seymour at ext. 5008.

Iccture

as a

place to finish offthat dream about margaritas on the beach is a bad idea. Unlike high school, people tend not to wake you up, unless you snore.Thiscan present a problem when you go to class for MATH 135 and wake up in the middle of CHEM 123. Sleep at home and eat something before you go to school. And if you’re going to go, pay attention. Just being in the classroom will not somehow make you smarter. Most imporeantlyget to know your classmates. It’s fairly easy to get to know the people you live with; they tend to yell more. But if you’re in an unfidmiliar class get to know somebody else in it. Go to lunch, chat after class, but get to know them. Your faculty societies are awesome for this and many of them provide other services that can only help you out. I think you’re going to like it here, I did and generally I’tn a miserable human being. But i” you make a mistake, laugh it jrT. After all, just wait till secor, year.

IMPRINT,

Friday,

August

NEWS

29, 1997

Campus

Qu&ion:

What do you want to-be when vou

A bunch of things teacher, babysitter.

a doctor,

singer, Taylor

A person blirdbelle

at the bank.

A marine

Huyah

Harrington

biologist

Kate BroughaIl

proswimmer.

An author

and

Stephanie

Harrington

grow

A veterinarian Matt

or a keyboard

Maw

Vet and pro dancer.

A dentist.

Tasha

Jaime

Bruce

up-:â&#x20AC;&#x2122;

Burns

. . .,. XC.. .,. ..:,,..___. . . 1-1 -. ,, ,; .'.. .... -' "., _,,,, ._....._, ': # ~~~~~~~.~~Trn

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player.

Editorial by Peter Lenardon Editor in Chief

Your paper and your school

s it better to be loved or feared? Machiavelli ad vised the latter. At Imprint you can experience both. Add to that list hated, disrespected, ridiculed, misunderstood, praised, but above all, read by over 12000 people every week. No other organization on campus can claim co reach that many students every week. As an introduction to first year students and those who may have been reluctant co come down and contribute to Imprint in the past, I will tell you a bit about our organization and possibly dispel a few myths about your student newspaper. As our masthead scares, Imprint is the Official Student Newspaper of the [Jniversity of Waterloo. Administratively, that means students voted in a referendum a few years back and made us “official.” (See the history of Imprint on page 23) We are also partially funded by your $4.10 contribution. Being the studcnc newspaper also means that we attempt to cover the news, sports and entertainment that students want to read, reflecting the range of different world views and interests on campus. But we are few, and our audience is many. As with any form of expression, Imprint’s content reflects the students who produce it. That’s where you come in. We need you down here to make sure all the bases are covered. Imprint has been accused of being a closed shop, exclusionary, a clique. Well, we are a clique. We are a group of people who spend a lot of time together and are passionate about putting out a great-looking, informative, thought provoking, prejudice-challenging newspaper. But we are also the easiest clique in the world to join. I walked in the door for the first time in September 19YS, knowing nothing - I was news editor by January and a year or so later I am editor-inchief. We wclcomc anyone who is enthusiastic about writing or layout or photography or drawing or - well the list is huge - you can contribute in any way you like depending upon your area of interest or expcrcise. Another common complaint: Imprint didn’t cover my news confercnce/bakesalelmarch/ protest - we only have so many people and well, sometimes volunteers wdnt to have a life outside the Imprint office (I’ve heard it’s possible, but I wouldn’t know) - that’s why we need you. r>o you feel environmental/religious/ poIitical/women’s/men’s/animal rights issues are downplayed in the mainstream media? Come down and write about ic. Write news. Write an opinion piece. Write a regular column. Write a letter. Draw cartoons. The possibilities for expression in your student newspaper are nearly endless, and we have the tools to make your ideas a reality. I’ve been to conferences in Canada and the IJnitcd States and our facilities are second to none as far as student papers go. So come down to the Student Life Centre, room 1116 and express yourself.

A bit about

Here’s a few things about the University of Waterloo I learned in my considerable time here. Take heed, you’11 be glad you did. Don’t worry if you make less friends in the first week than the aggressive personalities and “beautiful people.” It is a long year, people will notice you. Many will ask for your money, few will ask for your Input. Bitch whenever possible. If you have a car, Parking “Services” will tow it away if you turn your back for one second. It might be the professor’s fault. Birch whenever ?ossi ble. You will get a cold during your first term. Take the :ime to get rid of it before you can’t. The Registrar’s Office and Co-op can sometimes nake you feel like cattle or vermin or both. Don’t let :hem. Bitch whenever possible. Sometimes you have to stop bitching and do somc:hing about it.

The forum pages allow members of the University of Waterloo community to present their through letters to the editor and longer comment pieces. The opinions expressed in columns, and other articles are strictly those of the authors, not of Imprint.

ZO’flANNIYERSARY OFELYIS’ DEd7H

on various comment pieces,

views

issues letters

80’11H ANMiVERsfWi bF ELVIS’DEfWH

The University of Waterloo Student Newspaper Fridiy, August 29,1997 - Volume 20, Number 8 tife Centre, Room 1116, University of Waterloo, Waterloo, Ontario, N2L 3Gl Ph: 519-888-4048 - Fax: 519-884-7800 - e-mail: editor@imprintuwaterloo.ca www: http://imprint.uwaterloo.ca

Student

Editorial Editor in Chief Assistant Editor Forum Editor News Editor News Assistant Arts Editor Arts Assistant Sports Editor Sports Assistant Features Editor Science Editor Photo FXtor Photo Assistant WWW Page Editor WWW Page Assistant Systems Administrator Graphic Editor Proofreaders

Board

Peter Lenardon vacant vacant vacant vacant vacant vacant vacant vacant vacant vacant vacant vacant vacant

vacant vacant vacant vacant

Staff Business Manager Advertising/Production Advertising Assistant

Marea Laurie vacant

Willis Tigert-Dumas

Rob Van Kruistum

and Stephen

Staff Liaison

Contribution

Johnston

Mike Owen vacant Rob Van Kruistum Jeff Pee ters Jeff Spitzig Klaus Steden Leigh Anne Jenkinson

List

Sandy Atwal, Reni Chan, Annie Clarke, Kimberly Cooper, Jillian Drage, Matt Feldman, Kelly Foley, Jeff Gardner, Natalie Gillis, Rebecca Higgins, Paul Holloway, ShirlcyAnne Hopkins, Tracy Hunt, Brian Kalbfleisch, Darryl Kelman, Rick Knight, Jack Lefcourt, Tony Martins, Debbra McClintock, Kim Moser, Mike Owen, Kerry O’Brien, Dewey Oxburger, The Parking Lot is Full, Jeff Peeters, Greg Picken, Paul Rencoret, William J. Rowe, James Russell, Candace Rutka, Todd Sieling, Jeff Spitzig, Darren Spitzig, Rob Van Kruistum, Patrick Wilkins Peter would like to thank the small group who worked their asses off for this one. You people are great. Main

Distribution

of Directors

President Vice-President Secretary Treasurer Directors at Large

section

and Arts section cover photographs by Peter Lenardon; photoillustration by Stephen Johnston

Imprint is the official student newspaper of the University of Waterloo. It is an editorially independent newspaper published by Imprint Publications, Waterloo, a corporation without share capital. Imprint is a member of the Ontario Community Newspaper Association (OCNA). Imprint is published every Friday during fall and winter terms, and every second Friday during the spring term. Imprint reserves the right to screen, edit, and refuse advertising. Imprint ISSN 0706-7380. Mail should b addressed to Imprint, Student Life Centre, Room 1116, LJniversity of Waterloo, Ontario, NZL 3G 1.

Imprint subject gender,

welcomes letters to the editor from students and all members of the community. Letters received vi? electronic mail must be verified to editing for brevity and clarity. The editor reserves the right to refuse to publish letters or articles which are judged to be libellous race, religion or sexual orientation. Opinions expressed are those of the individuals and not of Imprint.

So long, and thanks

for all

the Salmon

t’s been nearly a year since I made my escape from UW, diploma in hand and utterly jobless, and made the move West. Most of the vacationer’s notions about B.C. that moved along with me have since been disemboweled by daily experience and replaced with semi-informed observations, leaving me with a sense that living in the East of Canada most of my life taught me nothing about the West, largely because the former seems not to pay much mind to the latter. Let me give you an example. . What’s happened so far this summer that you likely didn’t hear about from any significant national news media, most of which are based in the East-earthquakes, the garbage strike, setting a monthly rainfall record in the first ten days of July, the mysterious new Asian flu that seems to be spreading East, the nut up on Fraser and 19th who’s been shooting his pellet gun at city buses, thunderstorms, my new Montreal Maroons sweater, and yes, we’re all stoned, every one of us. What happened that you did hear about? The salmon war, of course. It’s been hard not to hear about, being one of the noisier disputes between Canada and the U.S. in recent history. Then again, almost any situation in which the U.S. thinks it has been wronged is bound to be loud. Surprisingly, though, the noisiest shots have not come from below the 49th, but from Premier Glen Clark and the West coast fishing industry. Some of the moves played so far, such as the arrests of American boaters for failing to observe a usually unenforced law requiring them to radio their presence and stow their fishing gear upon entering Canadian waters, or the fishing-boat blockade of an Alaskan ferry for several days in Prince Rupert must strike Easterners as a bit rash, perhaps wild, or even zany; and now even Great Ottawa’s serious attention has been drawn with Mr. Clark’s plan to cancel the lease of the Nanoose Bay seabed to the U.S. Navy. Yes, we must seem to be playing fast and loose with the States; ifyou’ve been following the news, that is. Unlike its story on the national news, this situation hasn’t appeared out of nowhere. Rather, it has been brewing and stewing since at least ‘95, when the last salmon-sharing treaty expired without a new agreement to take its place. Feelings were strong l

among the two peoples even then; a friend’s anecdote tells of a trip to Seattle, where he was charged double the posted cover at a bar because the doorman (a fisherman by day) didn’t appreciate the policy nor practice of Canadian fishing interests. Start’ing out in what seems to have been a tense situation to begin with, one can see how the diplomats might not have much better luck. When they left the table in ‘96, the Canadians were pointing the finger of “bad faith” and accusing the Americans of stallingso.that when the salmon run started, there would be no treaty to limit their take. And so it has come to pass. Alaskan fishermen, being the first to intercept the salmon run, hauled in about three times the amount of salmon they were allotted under the old treaty. Suddenly the stall-for-time theory started to Iook real, and like we were going to take some dirt in our faces. I3ut now that the salmon are well into their run through B.C. waters, Canadian fishers have taken about 85% of the available stock and are promising to take as much as they can before the run has finished its Canadian tour. This was made possible by David Anderson’s Canada First policy, which seems to be the first real support Ottawa lent in this chapter of the story. It also seems to be the best way for Ottawa to make peace with the people of B.C. while it. snubs the premier by intervening in his decision on Nanoose Bay, which Clark has been left out in the cold on by other premiers as well as the feds. And you can’t blame either for not supporting him on this one. As it was aptly put in the Vutzctw z~rSun, we need the military protection of the U.S. more than they need the salmon, no matter how much any of us might like to tell them to go get stuffed. So forcing the navy out of Nanoose Bay would be a mistake, especially with the murmurings of softwood trade penalties in the U.S. senyte should Mr. Clark have his way (a way he seems to want out of more and more of late). But even if Clark has to eat his rash words, they likely wouldn’t taste too bad with a bit of smoked salmon, and prices are likely to be low this year. I don’t know if B.C. fights all its arguments with the States like this, but something is patently clear: the actions of the Canadian fishers and the words of the premier show that neither is willing to wait for the kind of support that Tobin, Warrior Premier got from the feds in his turbot tussle with Spain about two years ago. If

such support is always lacking for the West in a dispute with a force as powerful as the U.S. (or at least the sandwich of Alaska, Washington and Oregon that B.C. finds itselfin), then maybe what it takes to get a response like the Canada First fishing initiative is a move like the Price Rupert blockade or a call like Nanoose Bay, and maybe the actions of the fishermen and Clark’s bombast, although questionable, are not nearly as weird as they may seem from a distance.

Next stop: adulthood

ecoming an adult happens in stages. It’s not quite a smooth incremental transition but more like bouncing along the giant jagged edge of a broken beer bottle. Every time you hit a certain point you’ve advanced in your metamorphosis, Your first year at university is a pretty big step on the way. Everybody marks the passage differently. I’ve heard of people who have decided they will be an adult when they have a spice rack, or life insurance. Other pinnacle moments have included your first Visa card, having good credit, having bad credit, the first time your parents refuse to bail you out of a financial pinch. Graduating from university is also relatively significant. Now that I’ve had four full months as a graduate, I find it’s little things which remind me that I’m on an unstoppable slide toward adulthood. It’s quirks and changes in my be havior. All of this occurred to me when I was furiously pedaling on a Life Cycle while reading C++ furDummk It’s not so much that this was clearly a very “not cool” thing to be doing because I was nevercool and neverwill be. What really struck me was.WHY I was engaged in such an activity at the relatively young age of 26.5 years. Firstly, I found my self on a Life Cycle because somebody told me that the habits you have in your twenties are the habits you have for life. I’ve only got 3.5 more years till I’m 30, and I’ve got tons of habits, none of which I would like to keep for life. The life cycle is my attempt at picking up a good habit. The C++ book is prompted by my fear of unemployment. If you haven’t already, you’ll certainly be inundated by diatribes on the new economy and the changing workplace. All of which

will indicate that the likelihood of finding lasting employment is dwindling to nil. ’ Versatility, portability, life long learning and such are the accompanying buzz words.The point being that it will be much tougher to survive unless you can do a whole whack of things at expert proficiency. In addition, you should be able to switch careers mid-stream. You must walk, chew gum and keep pace with tech&logy simultaneously. So I’m teaching myself how to program, taking a course on Local Area Networks and constantly honing my resume. I’m running to stand still or to keep going with the cheesy metaphor, cycling to stand still. You’ll notice that the reason I’m on the Life Cycle is my age, while the C++ book comes from my generation. Everybody approaching 30 starts to worry about getting old, no matter what generation you come from. Unless of course you exist in Dickensian, newly industrialized England, in which case 30 is old age. Nonetheless, in recent Western society 30 marks the time when you start buying skin cream you’re pretty sure won’t work-The fact that I’m worried about unemployment is a function of the fact that I was born in 1971. If I had been born in 1951, at 26.5 years of

1 he

parking

Lot is Full

with a signature. or discriminatory

All material is on the basis of

age I’d have my pick of jobs. The reason I know all of this is because I’ve been reading David Foot’sB00m, RustandEcho. This the bestseller that teaches you about how to make money from demographics. That’s what the jacket cover says, however, I think it’s just an egosurf for Baby Boomers. The Boomers are the now middle aged population explosion from the post-war years. Naturally, in that period of relative prosperity people were reproducing like rabbits. The end result was a bulge of people within the same age group affecting everything from employment rates to the ’60s nostalgia television programming. The problem in my view is that not enough Boomers have actually read Foot’s book. They think that their generation is the best, with best way of doing things and the best attitude toward life. The reality is that there are so damn many of them the world has had to cater to them as they age. When they left home the cost rental property soared. When they bought homes real estate flourished. When they had kids General Motors inflicted the minivan on the streetscape. More importantly the baby boom is one of the reasons I’m stuck reading about C++, one of the reasons youth unemployment

by Pat Spacek and Pete Nesbitt

http://www.mars.execulink.com/-nesbittPLIF/index.htm

FORUM

14 is over 2% higher than that of middle aged people. There is a bloated generation of people clogging upper and middle management. That means that people who should have been promoted are stuck in the entry level jobs that are meant for us. That leaves it up to us to be entrepreneurial and create our own jobs in our own industries. It also means that when the boomers hit 65, which will start around 2014, there won’t be much of the Canada Pension Plan left for us. It’ll be a rather tough job for us. And the moral of this story is: It’s my parents fault I have to read C++ for Dummies and my own damn fault I have to ride a Life Cycle. -

K&y

F&y

Ontario Hydro’s got to go ay back in March, 1996, I wrote a column on Hydro Ontario’s Power Workers Union. They had started taking out full-page advertisements in the Globe and Mail in an effort to persuade the public to tell Mike

OQCTORllTE.

Harris not to privatize the company. They made a few points in their ads which have become so ludicrous now that they’re worth reviewing. 1. You ‘Ilpay morefuretricity. Hmmm. Somehow I can’t help but be skeptical that Ontarions are going to be paying Ias for electricity in the near future. Thanks to Ontario Hydro, someone has to find between 5 and 8 billion dollars(!) in the near future to close down several of Hydro’s vaunted CANDU reactors, Surprise surprise, Hydro says these costs are not going to be passed onto the consumer. I say bullshit. Either we pay through a rate increase, or we pay through provincial taxes that subsidize Hydto. The money’s gotta come from somewhere, and one way or another, that’s us. 2. When rdiddihy iflt~ms wdh pu@s, guess whidi 0 flemfftn. Well, despite Hydro’s amazing ability to lose money, they haven’t been able to so consistently provide us with reliable power - except by cutting corners in exactly the same ways that they want you to fear private companies doing. , 3. Who will be fmpmsilrle for nuchw safety? This is the kicker. I can’t believe the Power Workers Union actually dared asked

this question. I think it is abundantly clear that the only correct answer at this point is atlyonebtit t&~. The first leaks from the report were harsh: employees sleeping on the job, playing video games on the nuclear power plant computer system, repeated safety violations, malfunctioning safety equipment - including the systems that are supposed to prevent meltdowns! Now an even harsher indictment of the Union has been revealed. The workers are drinking and smoking pot on the job! And we’re not talking about on a smoke break, we’re talking about inside the core! The most secure area (theoretically) in the whole place. I think the Unionshould have saved its PR fund just a little longer. Regardless of whether or not Hydro gets sold, it looks like there are hundreds of people who either fucked up large or looked the other way while it was happening who need to be fued right now. I mean right goddam now. I can’t even conceive of a fitting punishment for someone who farts around in a nuclear reactor a couple of kilometers from the biggest city in the country. It is not a situation where you get a lot of second chances. So now what? Fire the idiots

IMPRINT, and their bosses, shut down the unsafe reactors, start burning some coal like in the good old days, What’s next for Ontario’s power needs? I think the solution is clear. Privatize. The arguments against it are now nuI1 and void. With Ontario Hydro as a public utility we’re looking at another $8 bil-

etc.

29,

1997

lion to cough up to pay for terrifyingly unsafe nuclear reactors. Privatization has its advantages (e.g. competition - low rates) and it can’t possibly be worse than what we’ve got now. The only problem is, as things are, who’s going to buy the damn thing?

Entrenreneurshib -~ -~. - - ~ - ~~~- In --- Waterloo _ _ ___ _--_ _ by Jonathan

dults Only Video currently operates 53 stores across Canada. It is hard enough starting a business from scratch, but imagine starting a new business in the forefront of a highly controversial industry. That was what Randy Jorgenson was up against when he opened the first Adults Only in Saskatoon in 1987. Because it was such a new industry, the law was unclear with matters dealing with explicit material. It’s hard to play the game when you don’t know the rules. A few years later, Jorgenson expanded into Manitoba and opened 8 stores in 3 months. There were petitions, public outcries and lots of media attention. As Jorgenson explains, *‘everyone likes talking about sex and it makes good copy.” Police raided the stores in Winnipeg and the next day there was press release announcing that Randy Jorgenson was the new record-holder in Canada for criminal charges brought on an individual at one time. Jorgenson says there were approximately 1700 charges. Ontario was the last province to allow explicit materials on videotape, changing the legislation in 1990. Jorgenson pointed out that this provided a weird situation in Ontario. “At that time you could get something from Quebec or mail-order it from Bri tish Columbia. It wasn’t illegal to own the product, it was only iBegal to sell, rent or distribute the product. You could be a crimina1 in Ontario, but not in the rest of Canada.” When the rules changes in 1990, Jorgenson opened 24 stores in Ontario in 5 months. Even with the change in legislation, 22 stores were raided by the police. Today, there is so mu&h business done in Ontario that Jorgenson moved the head office to Kitchener. One might assume that it was tough to get customers to warm up to the idea of Adults Only Video, but as Jorgenson explains, this was not the case. “The customer were already consuming the product through mail order,

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Friday, August

Ezer

satellite television or importing it during their travels.” Obviously, local distribution made the products much cheaper. Over the past few years, the rules have finally gotten clearer. “Back in the early years, the obscenity laws were very vague, and there was very little case law that could give direction to the prosecutors and the courts. Since then, cases have gone to the Supreme Court and there has been some re-de4ning of the interpretation of the laws.” Jorgenson also notes that provincial laws have become more consistent across the country. This makes national distribution much easier. Today, Adults Only Video is a very successful business. They have clearly weathered the worst part of the storm and are trying to expand their client base. Currently, Adults Only Video and the industry is moving from a maledominated market to a couples/ relationship oriented market. Jorgenson wisely sees the future of his business tied to technology. “We certainly have to address technology. It’s going to change the way that the video industry does business. If you want to have a company around for a couple hundred years you better be damn sure that when the technology changes you can adapt to it.” Recently, Jorgenson has consolidated the business a bit by selling some locations that were geographically hard toservice. He sees this as a trend in the future, because with new technology, customers could be serviced without having a store on the corner. Some people have said the Jorgenson was lucky to get into an industry at just the right time. To that, he responds, “The harder I work, the luckier I get.” When asked for some advice for young entrepreneurs, Jorgenson replied, “There isn’t any brilliance to it, you don’t need to be smarter than anyone else, you just need to be passionate about it and immerse yourself in it. If you keep doing the things that you love doing, you’11 be successful.

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Mir station’s struggles continue Troubles a reminder of the dangers in space exploration by Mike Imprint

Owen staff

he Mir space station is a huge topic for all the space geeks and NASAphiles of the world right now, and for good reason. Watching the trials of the cosmonauts on board it we are witnessing more than the struggle of the Russian space system to stay afloat. We’re also seeing some real examples of normal life on a space station, where accidents can happen no matter how many precautions you take. Major space programs have always had a sort of “do or die” style to them, and the smallest of mistakes can often lead to the deaths of entire crews of astronauts. But it is becoming very obvious that even in space with very highly trained crew members accidents are bound to happen, and chance can sometimes lead to horrible problems. This is the true acid test of space station design unfolding in front of you - it isn’t about the space station holding together, it’s about whetherornotthecrewcanreally maintain such a delicate machine in the harsh conditions of outer space, with the normal everyday problems that happen. After all, if you consider it, the biggest problem to hit Mir thus far was a human error. The navigation of a supply ship was for some reason being performed manually instead ofautomatically, and the pilot made a few mistakes. The result of these reasonably minor errors was a critical powershortage inMir, and doubts as to whether or not the station was even going to be salvageable. These doubts were completely paranoid, but the crash still illustrated the delicate nature of lifeon a space station. A far cry from the huge ships and Death Stars of Hollywood, today’s space stations have nothing but a few thin layers of ordinary material separating the crew from a vacuum that would kill them in thirty seconds. There are no force fields, no transporters, and no Dr. Speck to valiantly save the crew while sacrificing himself. Even if Spockwere there, there wouldn’t be much he could do anyway. All of this is coming at an unfortunate time for the American space program, which is generally regarded as the world’s best and a major leader. In the case of space stations, the United States is lagging badly behind Russia by a huge amount, having no space station themselves. There have

We’re

on a

road to nowhere,. .

been some plans on the drawing board for a while, but their funding has been continually cut by a President facing some tough economic times as he tries to cut down the budget, A situation like that of Mir is just another bullet in the gun to be fired at any future American stations. But is this timing really so unfortunate? The value of space

stations seems rather questionable today, especially when unmanned space exploration is beginning to show itself as the more economically feasible path to take in the future. It certainly isn’t as fast as manned exploration, but let’s face it, are we going anywhere soon? At a time when space exploration is difficult to justify at all, the costs involved in

putting up a tiny room in space for a few people to live in for years is neariy impossible to explain. This isn’t to say that there’ll never be another space station built again, but even the current plans for stations have been under fire for their cost and real value. Even when you consider how long Mir has lasted to this point, the immediate cost of a

space station is daunting, even to a country that throws approxi-. mately four hundred billion dollars into its military every year. NASA has for years had some major programs that were actually dedicated to the emploration of sections of the Earth. If there is anything that is really worth looking at right now, it’s our own planet and the problems that it’s facing. It’s time for people to admit the truth: there are no funny green men out there who are about to walk up to us and tetl humanity the meaning of life. And if we ruin this planet now, then we aren’t going to have the time to flee to a newly terra formed planet in the near future. Yes, the space program was a lot of fun, and it made for an exciting race back in the fifties and sixties, but the ecunomic boom of those times is over, and so is the race. Can’t we just get back to worrying about our own planet now, and forget about Mars for the time being? So all eyes are going to be turned towards the Mir station for the next few weeks. The spacewalks run in the last week seem to be showing some light at the end of the tunnel for Mir, and you can bet that it won’t only be Russia’s space program watching the results. There’ll be people from every space exploration body in the world observing, and worrying about what they could lose if Mir ends up being abandoned. lZlaybe we should be thinking about what our planet could gain.

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SCIENCE

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Friday, August 29, 1997

Learning anatomy and keeping your sanity New guide to the human body gives students an edge The Anatomy Random

Princeton Review Coloring Workbook Houseof Canada, $21.95

a new, interactive way of learning the intricate parts and processes of human anatomy.

digestive systems and everything in between. And it’s not cumulative work, either.

Featuring more than 120 individual diggrams, the Coloring Workbook steps through the body without . missing a beat. The first chapter begins with the simplest unit of life, the cell, and proceeds through the skeletal, muscular, nervous,

Start at the beginning with terminology of the cell or jump into the

venous system of the head and neck -each section stands alone as a complete unit. ‘7 hear, and I forget; I see, and I remember; I do, and I understand” reads a quote in the preface. Where most texts simply lay everything out for the student and expect understanding to follow, this book allows the reader to “experience” anatomy, where understanding follows much easier. All the processes and strutcures in the book are completed in the same format. Opening the bookalways yields two pages done in the same format: the left containing text and the’righ t containing one or more labeled diagrams. The text begins with a brief overview of the section to be studied. The boxed sections outline where your coloring should begin and the details you should notice about the structures you are encountering. As you continue, the text explanation becomes more specific, yet proceeds in a logical manner until you reach the next boxed section for the continuation of

by Matt Feldman Imprint staff

hen I left elementary school, I thought my coloring days were over. The crayons, the colored pencils, the markers, they could all be packed away - I wouldn’t be needing them anymore. I had one teacher in high school who made me think twice about my decision, but for the most part, I was correct. There just was no place for do-it-yourself color in my work, especially in University, where color plates and detailed illustrations in hundred dol lar text books are the norm. I’m sure there are people on this campus who even forget what pencil crayons look like, . But they haven’t read The Princeton Review’s Altaromy Colonitg Workbook.This novel idea is more than just a coloring book of the human body, it% a fantastic learning tool that gives the reader

your coloring. By the end of the page, the explanation is complete and the diagrams are finished. The concepts discussed are retained with ease *because you just stepped through them, identifying them in a Iogicai fashion and applying an appropriate color. Instead of simply memorizing the arteries of the body, for example, from a diagram in a standard textbook, here you understand those structures because you just traced blood flow, artery by artery, with notonlyyour hand, butyourmind. Will this replace your textbooks? Probably not. The intricate details you’ll find in specific courses, like chemical composition of structures, for example, just aren’t there. But that’s the good thing - this book is about learning the concepts of human anatomy. And it delivers extremely well. As much fun as the Anuto~~y Colotkg Wor&book can be, it’s not about coloring. It’s about efficient learning and better understanding. And hey, nobody’s going to tell on you if you don’t stay within the lines.

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SCIENCE

Friday, August 29, 1997

IMPRINT,

Emite Madness by Kerry Imprint

O’Brien sta8

robably the most ridiculed musical instruments are the drums. Ridiculed along with them are their masters, the drummers (oops, sorry, “percussionists”). Not many advances have been made in percussive technology as they have been made in almost all other instrument families since the Medieval Era. The trumpets evolved valves, guitars became electric, microphones amplified voices. Drumsticks? Well, uh, some of them now have nylon tips. Neat, huh? A new substance called Emite (pronounced ee-might) is changing that. Emite is an oriented plastic that holds increased strength, durability, and impact strength. Emite has been around for almost fifty years, the brainchild of Professor Ian Ward from the University of Leeds in England. Other scholars that have helped develop Emite are Dr. Ray T. Woodhams at the University of Toronto and Dr. Roger Porter at the University of Massachusetts.

continued

from

page 15

downloading by the readers. It’s certainly cheaper than diskettes, and there’s no worry about the disk failing, or being wiped clear by errant magnetic surges. Still, I can’t help but wonder about this choice, given the volatile nature of web pages. What if the web page moves and the reader is stuck? This probably

www.yamaha.com

Soon to be outdated.

The Emite drumsticks have been available now for some time, undergoing a few minor changes. For example, the first models were very durable in that they didn’t break easily, but were prone towards warping. This was

isn’t really a major concern though, as the code still is given in the book, and the programmer-to be would probably learn more by typing it in than by simply downloading it and compiling it. In a way, it’s appropriate to have a webpage for this setup. The webpage makes an excellent site to see some Java applets firsthand.

most evident in the smaller sizes such as the SAS and 3As. The sticks were reinforced and the warping is no longer a problem. The experimental versions were successful, despite the fact that the sticks cost around $30.00 a pair and the Iimited range of sizes (originally, they only came in 7A, SA, and 3A). Today they cost $29.95 at Waterloo Music, with a five dollar discount on the next pair when you bring them back (they’re recyclable). The range has expanded to include 2A and ZB sticks. At present the only marketable products are the drumsticks, but Emite could potentially hold markets within sports. Baseball bats made of Emite would be infinitely more environmentally sound than wooden bats (but that would certainly destroy baseball, just like aluminum, and we coulcMt have that). As well, hockey sticks made of Emite would be just as light and efficient, without wastage of trees. The possibilities are practically endless. The Emite companies also plan to expand into military products.

The choice of Java for a first language is an interesting one, as there are some obvious reasons why Java is an ideal choice. Java is becoming a very popular programming language due to its crossplatform design. That’s to say that if you write a Java program, any Java compiler, be it a Mat, Microsoft, Unix or SunOS platform will interpret the code in the same manner. Java is also a good choice for an initial language because of its dominance in World Wide Web publishing. For many people who simply want to improve a small business web site or a personal site, Java is the language to use, and they’ll have no need to know how to program in C++, Ada, or COBOL. And finally, the biggest advantage to Java is that it actually looks more like English than a few languages that could be named. Given these benefits, it seems likely that Java is probably going to become a more popular first programming language, especially for those who don’t need the complex features of C++ or Perl. Java Gently approaches the subject very well, and doesn’t move into the incoherent language of programming too quickly. Nonprogrammers should get a lot from this book, and even programmers with no experience with Java could find this book useful by skipping over the introductory chapters. If you’ve ever wanted to learn some basic programming, or wanted to spice up your website with some Java appIets, then this is the book for you.

Phn 578-6930 Fax 578-6933 E-Mail kitchener@onward.ca

SCIENCE

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Friday, August 29, 1997

You have a lot to learn The courses you were truly meant to take by Mike Imprint

Owen staff

f there’s one thing that is wasted on the average student, it’s an elective. Generally in first year, all the keen young kids take vile electives like Physics courses or, God help us all, Math courses. This probably seems like a great idea when your parents are looming over your shoulder, but guess what? They’re not here now, and you’re only a ten minute walk from the Registrar’s office. You can still save yourself from the Hell that is a crappy schedule. Now there are decent reasons to take electives that double as real and pertinent courses for your Science degree. You could be one of those people whose spirit has been broken by years of parenting, or the pressures of finding a “real job.” I have sad news for you. Taking calculus when you don’t have to does not make you seem wildly more employable. Eniployers will not look at you and say “I see you are familiar with Riesz Representation theorems for classical Banach spaces. You’re who we’re looking for!” Live with it. Accept it. Revel in-it. The following is a list of some of the more popular and fun courses out there that can help you enjoy your stay here at the University of Waterloo.

100 - This

Architecture

class is superb! slide shows with explanations

It consists of of the trends

in Architecture through the last few thousand years. Take it! You can look at the other Arch classes too, but they tend to be pretty intense. See if you can slip into the classes they offer in Rome, Italy. Tell your parents the travel is required.

Biology As an elective? It’s rare, but it can happen. Fermentation Biotechnology lets you make your own wine, but it can drag you into an insidious fascination with the formation of alcohol, and the making of beer. I’m kinda obsessed now.

trains in it? You too can join the tormented few who cake that course.

Drama Some of these sound really cool, and there are technical courses on lighting and sound for the other tech crew people out there. (243,244,341-344)

Classical Studies If you’re in Science, you can laugh ac all the struggling arts students. All the Roman and Greek stuff is good, the early medieval history is great. What’s left in classics?

Combinatorics Yeah, whatever. for an elective, more.

and Optimization

If you eake one of these you need to get out a lot

Computer

Science

100 - Where is that damn power button? You can’t even take this course if you’re in math, which sums it all up right there. 454 - You know that room in MC with the

East Studies

Music Earth Science Earth 121 and 122 are great introductions to the Earth, and you get to lick rocks in the labs! The paleontology classes are also excellent, but not easy (236,336).

140 - Popular Music and Culture. If you like music, you’ll love this course, and it’s a little less than strenuous. Taught by an excellent Prof.

Philosophy

Chemistry Are you intensely into beer and alcohol? Biochemistry 233,237, etc are for you.

Middle

These all sound very cool, but they never seem to be overed when I look for them. You could be one of the few on campus to be able to read and write in Arabic, which would look interesting on a resume.

Economics Eton 101 and 102 with Larry Smith are an institution here on campus, and everyone takes them. There’s a reason for this, so check them out.

100 - A good intro that will either you or annoy the hell out of you.

fascinate

Physics Quantum elective,

Physics Four. A highly enjoyable but save it for second year.

English 201- Short stories. Very cool, but you will have to work. 108 and 208 - Any of these are good, but the profs can apparently vary. Ask at the arts society office for some recommendations. Science Fiction with Stanley Fogel is highly recommended,onceMr. Fogel returns from his valiant quest to aid the revolutionaries of Cuba.

Environmental

Studies

195 -Wiggle your toes in the grass, and get a grade. Life is good, if they haven’t sprayed the lawns with pesticides lately. If they have. take 201 - Environmentaf law, and sue their asses.

Fine Art The History of Film series - watch movies, throw popcorn. These are apparently pretty good if you’re good at that art thing.

Geography Try 101 and 102 -they’re interesting, and they seem to lead to rather high marks.

History 130 -This class attracts a lot of people eager to learn about their lives in a “History” class.

Political Science 291 - It may not sound do.

fun, but the marks

Recreation and Leisure Studies These esting,

courses actually sound pretty interwith a tourism sort of slant to them.

Science (The Sci courses) These were all bird courses, but they’re apparently getring harder. Try the astronomy courses, they’re interesting, and you can buy my old textbook, So there you have it, a concise guide to the most interesting courses that you’ll take during your science degree! These courses are actually great for anybody, but it has always seemed like it was the Science and Math students who really needed to loosen up and take some interesting and unusual courses. Just remember something important about your University education. You aren’t just here to get a degree for a job, you’re here to learn something new, to hear about something you’ve never seen before. So choose your electives carefully! They’re your best opportunity to learn something new in your university career,

Cassini controversv

Launch countdown continues d by Mike Imprint

Departs every Friday at I:30 and 4:30 pm. Cost: $9:00 one way for Undergraduate Students and $17.00 return. Everyone else pays $11.00 oneway and$20.00 return Availabe at the Federationof Students Office in the SLCRoom 1102,

Come on in for furtherdetailsor call 888-4042

Owen

staff

here has been a minor controversy brefing in the press over the power source being used for NASA’s Cassini mission to Saturn, due to set off in October of this year. Instead of the solar panels typically associated with these missions in the public eye, Cassini will be powered by nuclear based generators known as RTGs. The controversy centres around charges by some that ehe RTGs are unsafe, and could, in the case of an accident, rain down radioactive debris; in the surrounding countryside. Radioisotope Thermoelectric Generators are actually a fairly old source of energy for space exploration, having been used since the Apollo missions. NASA has rushed to defend the use of these generators, pointing out that they have been in use for decades, and are excellently designed. The plutonium in

the reactors is actually carried in a solid, ceramic form, instead of the duse form that some have charged. In addition, NASA was quick to point out that the fuel is stored in eighteen individual shock and heat protected cannisters. Cassini also has high power requirements that cannot be met by solar panels without making Cassini so large that the launching would be impractical. One of the main opponents of this use of nuclear power is Bruce Gagnon, of the Florida Coalition for Peace and Justice. Mr. Gagnon has suggested that if nothing else, NASA should wait for a new energy source to be created before the launching of the probe. NASA has responded by saying that they see no reason to wait when the technology is available right now. The Titan IV rocket that will carry Cassini out of the Earth’s atmosphere is scheduled to launch on October 6 at 538 a.m. EDT. The travel time to Saturn is expected to be 6.7 years.

Friday, August 29, 1997

IMPRINT,

SCIENCE

Tailspin Tailless planes taking flight by Mike Imprint

Owen staff

In case you missed it, the X34 lacks the tail structure that is considered to be an essential part of planes today. So why was the tail cut off from the X-36? It’s not as though the tail is a superfluous section that you can chop off and

So there are a few obvious benefits to eliminating the tail section of an aircraft, and a few obvious reasons why the tail section can’t go. This was a problem that sat around for some time, because there was no applied research in the area. It tooksome innovative thinking brought forward by NASA’s Dryden Flight Research Centre, a major centre for aeronautical research in the United States. In 1994, they brought out theX-31, a plane designed to use vectoredthrust exhaust systems to help in the maneuvering of jet planes at supersonic speeds. What this translates into is the use of paddles at the exhaust of the jet to manipulate the directions the thrust is being sent, making the

forget about, as the tail controls a large part of a plane’s yaw and roll control. Up until a few years ago, there seemed to be no other way to control these aspects effectively, but the tail section poses a few problems for designers. One key point is the drag provided by the tail section. This might not really seem like a critical issue for a plane that can travel several times the speed of sound, but there are some key times when the tail puts all of its drag in the wrong places. Fighter pilots have often dreamed of being able to fly forward while turning the plane to the side and skidding, as it were, to hit the right angle of attack for an enemy craft. Attacks of this sort are rendered impossible by the tail section, which rigidly forces fonrrard-only motion. The second major problem with the tail section is in its effects on the radar profile of the plane. A jet fighter’s profile on radar is influenced not only by its surface area, but by the alignment of that area with respect to the radar waves. If the waves are bouncing off of a curved or irregular surface, the waves will bounce with angles that send them away from the radar source. But with the tail section there is a large planar area that reflects rays straight back, and as a result the radar profile of a plane from the side can be greatly enhanced by the tail section.

jet able to push itself in directions other than straight forward. This is the same philosophy that was used for the Harrier jets of the R.A.F. but with the vectoring being used during the flight, instead of during take-offs and landings. Planes such as the X-31 and X-36 have paddles centered around the main exhaust of their jet engines. These paddles can provide effective pitch and yaw controls, much like the tail section of a typical airplane. The difference is that the thrust vectoring uses the power of the jet engines, allowing for stronger control and improved stability in situations where the plane is at an angle of attack pointing away from the main direction of motion. While the X-36 is showing that the tail section is no longer a necessity for fighter jets, it has actually gone further and shown that with the appropriate technology, there are actually much better choices than the conventional tail section. The new tailless planes will likely have increased maneuverability and control in combat situations. While the technology looks good at the moment, it may be some time before it starts to turn up in military vehicles, and even longer before it is used for commercial passenger planes. Personally, I’m happier in a plane that is always facing in the direction it’s moving.

oeing has long been recognised as an innovator in aeronautics, McDonnell Douglas an expert group for research in missiles, munitions and combat aircraft. Having the work of these two aeronautics giants together in one plane is always going to attract attention. However, there’s something a little more distinctive about the new X-36.

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SCIENCE

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Friday,

August

29, 1997

How to buy a computer The novice’s guide by Darren Imprint

Spitzig staff

ou may be considering purchasing a computer to get yourself through those exciting essays and all-nighters here at Waterloo. Unfortunately, many people have little idea what to look for, making them easy prey for salespeople. This handy little article will give you a good idea of what it should contain. Two types of users wiI1 be examined, the person that is buying a computer for games and the person that is buying to mostly use applications.

god-awful FPU(floating point unit, math cruncher) in the market. This means that 3D applications and the new generation of games will run poorly (can anyone say Quake?). On 2D applications, this peaky chip will really perform, which covers most of the applications a student will be running other than games. Examples of these include word processing and web browsers.

going

to run the cost up.

Monitor Think about your monitor like this-it is the main means of viewing your computer’s output. You really don’t want to shortchange yourself by picking up an old cash register LCD. If you can afford it, I recommend picking up a 17 inch monitor (at least 15.5

The Application Workhorse For the Non Gamer.

Processor A buyer that plans to mostly run applications under Windows 95 should consider buying a system with a Cyrix processor. The Cyrix chip really does run Windows applications faster than an equivalent Intel Pentium processor, and it costs hundreds less. The newest Cyrix chip out now is the MX(formerly called MZ). It contains the Intel MMX instruction set, and under Windows 95 is almost unbeatable. However, it is NOT suitable for gaming. This is because Cyrix is hell-bent on having the most

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viewable). If you can’t, a 15 inch monitor should work just fine. Make sure that it supports a high refresh rate, and reasonably high resolutions. If you are using a 15 inch monitor, you will want to set your resolution to 800 x 600 (so you can see the icons). You can set it higher if you get the 17 inch model. Make sure that it is non-interlaced and that it has no more than a .28 dot pitch (space between pixels). While dot pitch as a measurement is abused by some manufacturers, it may be all you understand. Give it a look in the store. Is the text sharp?

Are the graphics crisp? A word to the wise - screen savers may look great but they don’t rest your monitor. Set it to “sleep” after a few minutes of inactivity. This is a simple feature found in the screen saver tab under display in the control panel.

Video Card You are shooting yourself in the foot if you skimp on this one. Your video card handles some very important components of your computer. Your video card and monitor work together to bring you everything you see on your screen. You should look for a video card that supports ac least a 7SlIz vertical refresh rate(the speed your screen repaints itself at). This is about the Iowest you want to have it to ease the burden on your eyes. Have you ever had sore eyes after sitting in front of a monitor? This is why. Anything less than 75 Hz is just hard on your eyes. It’s like sitting in front of a flickering T.V. for hours, except your face is only a few feet away. If you have a 15 inch monitor, get yourself a 2 megabyte video card, and a 4 megabyte card if you have a 17 inch monitor. You need to do this because you want to be able to adjust the colour depth of your continued

to page 21

IMPRINT, continued

SCIENCE

Friday, August 29, 1997

from

page

Processor

screen. This is the number ofcotours that your screen can display at this setting. For instance, 16 bit colour, or high colour(minimuF setting in my opinion) is approximately 65000 colours. 32 bit colour, or true colour, displays millions of’ shades. The video card needs the memory 1 was discussing to provide this. Which video card you buy will depend on what you want to set your colour depth, resolution and refresh rates at. A decent entry level card is a 2 meg 31) Expression by AT1 technologies. Made right here in Ontario, this card is good enough to power a 15 inch monitor at 75 Hz refresh rate, #OO x 600 resolution, and 16 bit colour. This should bc fine for aI\ of your applications. If you want better than that, get yourself a Matrox video card. Plainly said, they make some of the best video cards in the world and they are based in Quebec, another plus. However, You really don’t need something like a hlarrox unless you’re going to be playing some good games, or working in Autocad programs.

Hard drive This is going to be surprisingly cheap to buy. The cost per megabyte for today’s hard drives are in the cents range. So don’t Ict anyone tell you that one gigabyte is enough. Once you start throwing on office suites and what not, you will wish you had that extra space(but it is too late). Look for one with somewhere between two and three gigabytes. It really won’t cost you much more. You don’t need a great brand name, performance isn’t what you are looking for.

Sound Card You won’t likely need anything better than a sound blaster 16, unless you are an audiophile. Most computers come bundled with a sound card, and you don’t need much for normal operations anyway.

Speakers Do you even need these? If you plan on playing music on your computer, the answer is yes. ALWAYS upgrade these from the pieces of junk that typically come You don’t with most systems. have to go overboard, just consider your needs and run with it. You can also consider hooking your computer up to your stereo, because computer speakers never sound as good as a stereo.

CD-ROM Get yourself at least an 8x drive. This is usually included in the system.

Modem How else could you surf? Get yourself at least a 33.6 modem, and a new 56 k one if you can afford it. Anything slower than a 33.6 will bog you down on the graphics heavy WWW.

The Gamer’s Rig

The gamer should not get anything less than a Intel Pentium 200. Why Intel you say? As I had mentioned above, the Cyrix chip just can’t handle 3D or FPU intensive operations. If you h&e the dough to throw down, get yourself a

COME TO...

get a SC?!&pronounced “scuzzy” drive. They’ll really set you back, but they’re incredibly fast,

Sound Card A sound blaster 32 won’t cost you too much, and you can get MIDI support for rich music scores. A lot of packaged computers come with wavetable upgrades available. If you feel really adventurous, you could get a Gravis Ultrasound, but be prepared to spend hours trying to get the configurations right for various games. A SB lb will do just fine though.

Speakers

Pentium II. This is the newest chip to come from Intel, and it really blows the competition out of the water on FPLJ and MMX heavy operations. Shy away from Pcntium Pro chips for two reasons. One, they cost more, and The two, they are slower! Pentium II chip is a Pentium Pro chip with MMX and some new features. The current rave in gaming is 3D, so you can’t risk instant obsolescence by getting anything else.

RAM at least 32 megs. You might want more, but no game requires more than 16 megs right now. If you plan on keeping a lot of windows open, this is the minimum. Like I noted earlier, RAM is inexpensive and more certainly won’t hurt.

You’ll

want

A good name for speakers is Aftec Lansing, and stib woofer are optional on some models. If you have a good stereo, you could check to see if your computer can be hooked up through the auxiliary channel of your stereo. This is a lot cheaper than speakers and subwoofers for your computer, because the subwoofers reatly boost the price up. Your stereo will probably sound better too.

GOLDEN GRIDDLE d

CD-ROM You’ll want at least an 8x, maybe more. The fastest out there now is 24xand a forthcoming 50x drive is in the works. Ifyou can afford it, why not? To be honest, you should watch out for DVD though. This format might just shake up the whole CD-ROM industry, so dropping a huge amount for a 24x or 50x might not be the wisest move in the world. DVDs packs at least 7 times more data on a disc than a normal CD.

Monitor A 17 inch monitor would be nice, but it isn’t mandatory. Look for one with no more than a 28 dot pitch and a non-interlaced screen.

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Video Card This is very important if you are going to be playing games. Get yourself a Matrox Mystique 220. You’ll thank yourself later when you get blistering FPS(frames per second). It also lets you keep the colour depth, refresh rate, and resolution up. You should get yourself a 4 meg card, mandatory if you have a 17 inch or larger monitor. You might also consider getting a 3Dfx card. These cards accelerate 3D and allow you to take advantage of games that offer this support(you have to see it to believe it)+ You may also want to get yourself a video card that supports OpenGL, a graphics programming language. This also makes games look great and gets you higher FPS, the ultimate goal of any gamer.

Hard Drive This is important when considering the overall performance of Since games typiyour system. cally eat up 50400 megs at a time now, get yourself about 5 gigs. A couple of good names in hard drives are Seagate, Western Digital and Maxtor. Quantum makes really big but not so fast hard drives. If you are really loaded,

Below you’ll find a few links to help you in your search for shareware and hardware. Tom’s Hardware Guide. It doesn’t get any better than this when it comes to hardware. This will really open your eyes when it comes to the various bits in your cotiputer. Http://www.sysdoc.lTair.com

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Tucows. This place is loaded with software, and most of it is shareware. Http://www.tucows.com You’ll want to jump to the Canadian mirror site nearest to you for quicker download times. Online GamIqg Review. If you are looking for cutting edge gaming information, look no further. Http://www.ogr.com So have fun looking for your new computer! You should always try to have someone with you who knows about computers, so they can tell you what you do and don’t need. If you can’t find someone, try to find a store where the clerks don’t work on commision. These are the stores where you’re more likely to get the machine that ~IU need, and nothing more.

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SCIENCE

IMPRINT,

Friday, August 29, 1997

Deathburgers by Matt Feldman Imprint staff

Our One Year Anniversary

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ext time you fire up that barbeque to cook some burgers, you may want to take more caution. You may not just be eating for yourself, you could be eating for millions. Of bacteria, that is. The most recent tale of Escherichia coli (E. coli) poisoning began August 12 in Nebraska. Hudson Foods Company, producers of over 2 million pounds of ground beef each week, voluntarily recalled 20,000 pounds of frozen beef patties. It was believed that the 0157:H7 strain of E. coli had contaminated the production of the beef. The source of the contamination was unknown. Bacteria are everywhere, but why the sudden uproar over this particular species? Since 1982, E. coli 0157:H7 has been recognized as a cause of hemolytic uremic syndrome (HUS) and colitis, the most frequent cause of kidney failure in infants and young children. In the United States, it is believed thae E. coli is responsible for20,OOO infections every year, 200 of them resulting in death. By August 17, both the number of illnesses and the amount of recalled ground beef had risen. E. coli bacteria were deemed responsible for 15 infections in Colorado where the products were sold. As officials from the U.S. Department of Agriculture descended upon the plant, the volume of bad burger ratcheted upwards. Before the day was over, 1.2 million pounds of beef was determined to be infected with the potentially deadly pathogen. James Hudson, president of Hudson Foods, seemed to be enthusiastic and co-operative about the discovery, saying “We’re not afraid of what they will find” and hinting to his own internal investigation into the spoilage. His outlook would become much more somber as the days passed. Many strains of E. coli occur without causing harm to our bodies. It is the 0157:H? strain which is particularly nasty, however, and is of prime concern when dealing with ground beef. Escherishiacoli occurs as part of the natural microbiota in the intestines of healthy cattle. If intestinal material comes into contact with meat during processing, the meat can become contaminated. Properly cut and hung beef should bc sterile and is normally safe to eat, even rare. In steak, for example, risk of contamination is low, bccause bacteria simply can’t penetrate the area from where your steak is cut. But with ground beef, the story is an entirely different one. Bacteria on the surface of the meat product are distributed by the grinding process of production and by the mixing process of making hamburgers, for example. The source of contamination in humans, however, isn’t always

simple intestinal contact with a raw meat product. Enteric bacteria can be ingested from just about anywhere via the “Fetal-Oral rou Ee.” Almost as disgusting as tbe name implies, bacteria in sewage-contaminated water or on the skin after improper hand washing can contact our bodies directly or via another food product. A recent suggestion about beef contamination cites cattle farmers’ cost-cutting strategies as the culprit. When cows are fed manure, slaughterhouse leftovers, road kill, sawdust, and even concrete dust instead of grains and hay, you’ll get out of the cows what you put in: shit. And you thought hot dogs were bad. In theory, this melange-de-slop could substitute actual nutrition as a diet for the cattle. But in practice, the breakdown and decomposition of the feed raises its temperature to 140 degrees Fahrenheit -- 20 degrees shy of what’s needed to kill E. coli and other pathogens. Ingested bacteria may can infect the cow before it goes to slaughter. By August 21 the situation in Nebraska had grown bleak, Burger King, Hudson’s biggest customer, stopped carrying their hamburgers at 1650 of their stores in 28 states. Massive media coverage resulted in public hysteria. Burger King customers feared their Whoppers held a whopping amount of E. coli, The total amount of recalled beef had skyrocketed to over 25 mitlion pounds. Although somewhat extreme, the public’s concern was based on solid scientific data. A previous E. coli outbreak in Washington state sickened over 700 and killed five. The confinomcnt of the contamination to under twenty people Miss the ione positive aspect of this incident. K. coli infection isn’t your run of the mill queasincss-in-yourstomach, either. It’s gory syrnptams include scverc abdominal cramps, bloody diarrhca and dehydration chat threaten young children, people with weak immune systems and the elderly. Food experts list handful of steps to take to ensure your burgers are bacteria free, all of which are common sense, none of which give us any new preventative steps. Don’t use the same plate for both the raw and cooked meat, washyourhandsaftcrdcalingwith raw ground beef and say goodbye to your medium-rare hamburgers -cook the beef until the innermost parts are no longer pink (or the juice is blood-free). Although not as damaging as it could have been in terms of ti human toll, this outbreak could ’ spell financial disaster for Hudson Farms, who may close their Nebraska processing plant. August 25 saw Burger King officially stop carrying Hudson’s beef products. Blame has been placed on a supplier, but Htidson stiIl stands to lose big from its largest customer’s pullout.

First there was chevron The story of how Imprint came to be by Rebecca Higgins special to Imprint

hen Imprint officially began as the University of Waterloo student newspaper in 1979, it did so rising from the ashes of its predecessor, the chevron. The chevron took over from the Corphaeus in 1966 and remained the campus paper for over ten years, publishing news, arts and controversial political commentary. In 1976,the chevron’s downfall began. The Federation of Students closed down the paper, fearing communists were controlling its editorial slant. The ensuing war dragged on until 1979, ruining careers, reputations and student unity in the process. In the mid-to-late seventies, some staff members belonged to an on-campus group called the Anti-Imperialist Alliance (AIA). This group was affiliated with the Communist Party of Canada (Marxist-Leninist) [CPC(ML)]. Towards the end of September 1976, chair of the Board of Publications, Ralph Torrie, and editor-in-chief Adrian Rodway, resigned from their positions. Rodway left citing increasing political pressure. Soon after, the Federation took action. On September 30, Federation President Shane Roberts closed the chevron for four weeks. According to the Federation, it was no longer working in the interest of the students. In addition to closing the paper, the Federation of Students fired Henry Hess and Neil Docherty, two paid staff members who belonged to the AIA. The chevron and its supporters were furious. Refusing to accept the closure they began to publish the free chevron, a paper funded entirely by advertising. The chevron staff were ordered to vacate the offices. Refusing, they occupied it at times for 24 hours to preserve the space, and to ensure that the Federation did not lock the offices. Chevron staff continued to deny the charges of political presesure, and charged that the Federation had no proof of communist control within the paper. Speaking for the staff, Docherty said the AIA could not possibly have control of the paper as AIA members on staff constituted a significant minority. Feds supporters were content with the closure and hoped that it would be permanent, in order that a more democratic paper could replace .the chevron. They were eager for a paper in which all student voices could be heard. Anti-chevron papers sprang up all over campus, including one called the real chevron. Four weeks came and went, and the war raged on. The University of Waterloo had slipped into the spotlight. Campus papers across Canada covered the Feds-chevron dispute, as well as the K-W Record and major newspapers like the Glube and Mud. It was difficult for outside observers to know exactly what was happening behind the chevron’s doors. Steve Izma was on staff at the newspaper when the uproar began, and vividly recalls that during 1975 and 1976, “more and more influential staff people became or turned out to be members of the AIA. “A lot of these people were sharp people, they had basically good political values, but they were very dogmatic in their way of dealing with issues that the newspaper was dealing with, and especially with the way in which the staff operated. . At’s very important to see it as an extreme of political philosophies that have validities in other respects. When people disagreed with their position, they just argued until the other people got tired and gave up in despair.” Izma and several others refused to be intimidated. Some, however, like Adrian Rodway, quit out of exhaustion. Though much of the staff held left-wing political views, they could not agree on the definition of “left,” “The problem was dogmatic left-wing versus a more astute left-wing. From 1968 on, [there was] a very consistent and sophisticated left-wing point of view [on the chevron], up until 1976 when the more simplistic kinds of ideas started .to be expressed. When Rodway quit in September, a lot of people started to panic because they reaiized that the kind of stuff that was going to come out of the paper was going to be more and more simplistic and

outrageous, ” Izma recalled. As new students came to work for the paper, they became “sucked in by the rhetoric” and heavily influenced by the powerful students on staff. John Wallace Bast came to work forthe chevron after the initial closure, in 1977. He later became part of Imprint’s first staff. Commenting on whether the chevron was reflecting the interests of the student body, Bast surmises: “The AIA people absolutely believed that their interests were the interests of the students. They were very self-honest people in their own way, but in general, heck no.”

Communists, what communists? Although Bast felt the CPC(M-L) presence, he maintains that the chevron’s shutdown by the Federation was not justifiable, although “it was an incredibly wonderful thing that happened because it’s the direct line of events that formed this particular newspaper.” By this time, the chevron’s “Reinstate! Investigate!” campaign was well’ underway, emphasizing that their first ,priority was to have the paper reinstated and Hess and Docherty rehired. Following that, staff members demanded a thorough investigation into the closing. On

October 3 1, the Federation offered to refinance the chevron if an interim editor was chosen until the Federation could hire a new one. The staff refused, demanding that the paper be reinstated along with Docherty and Hess. A resolution to the dispute seemed far from attainable. As a result of,the dispute, many people were unhappy with Shane Roberts, Feds President. Even Steve Izma, a friend of Roberts, had strongly opposed his decision and the methods he used to shut down the paper. On November 19, a chevron-led campaign against Roberts began, and just two days later, Federation Executive member

Franz Klingender threw a rock that shattered a window in the chevron offices. Klingender quit a few days later, becoming the sixth Feds Executive to resign since June, and was charged with mischief scmn after. The Federation decided to change the locks on chevron office doors in a desperate attemht to banish chevron staff from the premises. But the attempt failed when staff and supporters covered the door with their hands. Both sides were angry and punches were thrown but no one was hurt, although the incident merely widened the gap between the chevron and the Federation of Students. The anti-Roberts campaign continued, as students collected over 2000 names on a petition to exile the president. They accused himof failing to implement his policies and holding student-paid positions during four of his seven years on campus. In December,the chevron was ecstatic as Roberts was recalled from office. The joy was to be short-lived. Throughout the dispute, the chevron staff had been supported by the Canadian University Press (CUP). Slowly, this began to change with the new year. hlanny Brykman, an engineering representative on council, wrote an open letter to the students of the University nf Waterloo. Me expressed his anger over the fact that CUP supported the chevron, saying that in doing so, they were violating their own code of ethics. He char&d that students and council members were clearly unwelcome at free chevron meetings. New Feds President Dave McLellan asked for a CUP investigation commission, as had occurred previously with other student newspaper, and on January 21, 1977, the Canadian University Press’ National Executive decided to comply. When the free chevron staff found out about the planned investigation, they retaliated by sending letters to CUP members and the CUP National Executive. In the letter to all CUP members, the free chevron staff called the decision “a serious matter.” the CUP National Executive received a similar letter describing the staff as being “concerned and disturbed” over the proposed investigation. “My understanding is that they [the chevron staffl had been running this newspaper for a very long time in an undemocratic way,” says past CUP President Joanna Shep-herd. “A certain body of people made all the decisions and really it was a promotional paper for their political views rather than a student paper. One of the stipulations to be a member of CUP is that you have to be a democratically run Canadian student newspaper.” As CUP members rcalized that the chevron appeared to be behaving undemocratically, they withdrew their support. The newspaper did not seem to be adhering to the CUP’s code of ethics, and “there was no way CUP would be in support of a paper like that, unless they had rewritten the constitution, taken on an entirely new staff, and were no longer involved in the AIA.” January was a busy month in the Feds-chevron affair. Shortly after CUP’s decision was announced, the University of Waterloo held a referendum, the first of several, relating to the fate of the chevron. Roberts had been responsible for initiating the referendum before his recall. It asked students if they wanted a campus newspaper, if they wanted it to be involved with CUP, and what body should publish it. Other questions asked who should control the editorial content, voting and funding. Perhaps the most important question dealt with whether the Feds should reinstate the chevron. The results were overwhelmingly in favour of the Federation. Students said that they wanted a campus newspaper, and they wanted it to have CUP-membership. They wanted the Feds to control publishing and many of the policies, but voted for democratic, student-involved voting and editorial policy. Most importantly, UW students voted 2276 to 224 against reinstating the chevron and its fired staff. Predictably, the chevron staff was enraged. They called the referendum a fraud, and claimed that referendum rules and procedures were not followed. They charged that Feds supporters were guilty of harassment, vandalism and probable ballot box-stuffing. continued

to page 24.

FEATURES

IMPRINT,

Friday,

August

29, 1997

the death of the chevron continued

from

page 23

Ordered to vacate the chevron offices and served with an eviction notice, staff members continued to occupy the office space while publishing the free chevron. Feds elections took place and free chevron candi-

An interesting development in the affair occurred in March of 1977. According to the paper’s staff, Thompson approached the chevron with a signed proposal, offering to reopen the paper and pay all debts and back pay. This was exactly what the chevron had been waiting for. Was the

dates ran but were defeated in almost every area. St. Jerome’s College represented the chevron’s only real victory, where the candidate garnorcd 97 of 105 votes. In February, three staff mcmbcrs were evicted from the offices, but with the help of others managed to reoccupy the rooms. A battle ensued, and Feds President Doug Thompson claimed he was hurt in the reoccupation, while a chevron staffer also alleged violence against the Feds.

end of the six month long dispute in sight? But, at acouncil meeting four days later, Thompson admitted it had been a bad idea. He held that the proposal was not binding, but was merely an effort to clarify the chevron’s position. The feud continued. Finally, on June 26, 1977, nearly nine months after the paper was shut down, the chevron was reinstated at last. The chevron was to receive full reinstatement as well as a cash settlement of $13,500 in back pay and debts.

An investigation commission would be established with equal representation of both sides in order to resolve the conflict. After months of deliberation and commission hearings, the five-person commission held a majority position ofcondemning the Feds, and a minority position condemning both the chevron and the Feds. The commission agreed unanimously that the chevron should not be separate from the Federation of Students. By February, the chevron affair was declared finished. Peace lasted barely a month. In March 1978,chevron staff began to debate over whether to try for a separate refundable fee that would fund the chevron. Staff member Chris Dufault began collecting names for a petition, calling for a referendum. Other staff ma- L PW.7.rt:#a*‘c FCIZ.A..C CL:* :#a,,

longed Gto the Communist Party of Canada (Marxist-Leninist). Smit alleged that non-Party members on staff were being harassed and intimidated, and that the votes were rigged. He noted that the chevron staff seemed to be divided into two groups: CPC( ML) members, and “normal students.” Ironically, Dufaul t had written a letter in September 1976 a, the chevron supporting the paper, saying that he was always welcome, and free to write what he believed. Once again,the chevron denied all allegations of impropriety. March brought about another referendum regarding the future of the chevron dealing with the

nalism club on campus published the paper, initially funded by advertising and with the support of the Federation, much to the chagrin of the chevron staff. Loyal chevron staff called the new paper a “scab newspaper.” Unlike the chevron, Imprint focused on covering campus events and avoided some of the heavy political commentary thatthe chevron always imposed. Randy Barkman was Imprint’s first editor. Under his guidance, Imprint was a success on campus with its first issue, and on July 6,1978, Imprint published its second issue, signalling that it was on campus to stay. “They [Imprint staffers] tried to set it up with structures

and insisted Dufault stop, but he continued. The motion to take away Dufault’s voting rights was raised. Two votes were taken. The first vote was a tik, but the second indicated that the majority was in favour of dismissing Dufault. The Federation of Students were irate. Feds President Rick Smit blamed the problems on the group of chevron staff who be-

question of whether separation from the Feds was a good idea. In May, the two-part referendum was complete. Students voted in favour of a separate refundable fee, a result with which some chevron staff were unhappy. Imprint was born on March 31,1978and first published inJune. Disgruntled chevron ex-staffers, engineers and members of the jour-

that would prevent that kind of dogmatism,” recalls Izma, “and make it difficult for organizations like that to take over.” Looking back, Bast fondly recalIs his time at Imprint. He says that in the first year of the new paper, the staff “stayed absolutely clear of anything political. I

lIlGI11UG13

UIUll

IilVUUl

CIl13

1uca

continued

on page 25

Friday, August 29, 1997

IMPRINT,

Monday

A school in turmoil cried

MondayNightFootball- prizegiveaway!

out for a newspaper continued

from

page 24

don’t believe we mentioned the CPC(ML) ac all that first year, except possibly when there was something legitimately news-&nnected. 1 “Year 1 of Imprint was fabulous. If I had any particular period of my lift to do over again, that would be it. ‘The-G were some really first class people working on this paper then, and it was fun to be among them. I think it showed in the writing as well. The purpose wasn’t just to become the official newspaper or screw the chevron. Irs purpose was to do journalism. . .I think they did it.” Stretching over the first four days of September 1978, a CLJI’ commission began, called by borh the Feds and the chevron. Each side charged the other with intimidation and harassment, and cited incidents of impropriety. In addition, the Feds claimed rhat the chevron was not a democratic paper. Towards thecnd of&ptember, it was the chevron’s turn to testify before the commission. Staff charged the Feds with vandalism, harassment and infringement as well as attempting to refute the Feds charges. The chevron’s popularity piurnmeted. Spokesperson Neil Dochercy left the paper for “unknown reasons,” Chevron-and-Imprint veteran Bast remembers what really happened to Neil Docherty: “He had a nervous breakdown, basically. He was losing, and Neil was a winner.

He’d been fighting his own war for three years, and eventually you’ve got to break. He was actually a tremendously great guy.” By October, one-third of UW had withdrawn their financial support. In November, the engineering society searted a petition to finish off the chevron with a referendum. Of the 1,200 on-campus students at the University, 39 per cent voted and decided to withdraw student financial support which amounted to $40,000. Staff would be evicted once and for all from the offices, and the chevron would no longer be recognized as the official University newspaper. Another January arrived, and with it, another CUP betrayal in the eyes of the chevron. Two years before, in January 1977, CUP had responded to the Feds request for an investigation. Now, it voted on whether or not to expel the paper - a member since 1962 - from CUP for violating the CUP principle of staff democracy. At the National Conference (CUP 41), 37 papers voted in favour of expelling the chevron, while eight abstained and two papers -theiM+eandtiechevron - voted against the motion. In a position paper compiled by the Membership Commission at CUP 41, the decision was explained: “It has never been proven that the A1A controls the chevron, and we do not contend that it does. However, it is clear that it has an unduly powerful influence on continued

on page 26

lb4esdas

: PoolTournament everyTuesdayeveningat 9:00p.m.- greatprizes!

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is coming soon ... watch for more details in the ‘next IMPRINT. s:y

The Fed Bus leaves every Friday from UW Math & Computer Building, loading

dock at 1:30 and 4:30

p.m* It will drop you off at lslington Subway Station. Fed Bus returns every Sunday at 7:30 p.m. from the Beer Store parking lot across from Islington Subway Station.

PL?BLICITy COMMISSION: students interested in applying for this Dosition are asked to drop off a resume ‘. m the Fed Office, job d&criptions are available at the Fed Office.

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FEATURES

26 a continued

l from

Friday, August 29, 1997

and then there was Imprint

page 25

the paper, . as long as the AIA continues this presence on the chevron, we do not believe staff democracy can exist. Nor can the chevron be saved from its present ethical vacuum.” The chevron insisted that the allegations were lies and charged that CUP was violating its own code of ethics by not informing the chevron that its membership would be reviewed. The staff complained that they were not allotted time to prepare a reasonable defense. Imprint’s application for membership was turned down at the conference, although the paper was accepted a few months later. The chevron’s editor, Dave Carter, told the press that he would continue to publish, selling advertising to raise the funds necessary for production. The paper moved to an office in downtown Waterloo. Students voted soon after to give Imprint off&l status ;1s the IJniversity of Waterloo newspaper. Although the chevron was clearly finished, remaining staff were detcrmined to keep it running. In a January 1979 Globf and rlftiil article by Howard Fluxgold, chevron staffer Larry Hannant is quoted as saying: “We won’t tell you who our members are. The people who want to know are the state. We are a revolutionary organization and we definitely intend to organise a revolution against the state” Dr. Kenneth McLaughlin, official campus historian, remembers the chev-

ron affair well. He was teaching history during the scandal, and had several students who were involved inchevmn politics, including Larry Hannant. McLaughlin recalls that while the chevron was still publishing, before the scandal began, it moved the printing of the paper off-campus to Dumont Press Graphix, a company with a special significance behind its name. Imprint amiably broke away from Dumont Press Graphix

cause the chevron seemed to be no longer reflecting student opinion or student interest or student concerns. It seemed to have a political mandate of its own which had become almost severed from that of the Universi ty’s.” Dr. Burton Matthews was President of the University of Waterloo during the chevron affair. Eie recalls the reaction of students when the chevron was closed down in 1976:

in July 1979 when they began to use a student-owned typesetter. “[The chevron] renamed the printing company Dumont Press Craphix, after Gabriel Dumont, assistant to Riel and the Metis who’s probably the real leader behind the second rebellion, So it was symbolically a part of native rights [and] individual rights rebellion against authority which, by the 197Os, had seemed to come to be almost accepted by the establishment. “I suspect that many faculty members were relieved when it was shut down. . *be-

“I gather that there was general supamong the students for the action of Federation. The student body in genwas dissatisfied with the chevron and content of the chevron.” Asked if he feels that the chevron staff who belonged to the AIA were in fact controlling the paper, Matthews replies, “Oh, yes. I don’t think that there was any doubt about that. And the AIA was quite prominent in the writing that was there. “There’s always a lot ofconcerns when anyone tries to interfere with the ‘freedom

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of the press,’ but I think under the circumstances, the Federation acted wisely.” After the chevron was exiled it published off-campus, barely surviving on advertising revenue. WhileImprint thrived, the chevron continued to flounder until it finally collapsed for good in April of 1981. Since 1976, the deterioration of the chevron unfolded before the eyes of not only UW students, but of university media across Canada. Once considered an excellent paper, its popularity decreased dramatically during its final years. The paper’s inner politics slowly but steadily eroded it from within, until readership and support was practically nil. According to Dr. McLaughlin, such turmoil can occur whenever there is ‘&ferment and unhappiness” among students, and as apathy and restlessness increase so does the possibility of some form of political scandal. Because the founders of Imprint did so with every intention of maintaining democracy, and because of their insistence on independence from the Federation of Students as well as from the administration, it seemed unlikely from the beginning that Imprint would follow in the politically-tainted footsteps of the ill-fated chevron. Only time will tell. - with files from: the chevron, the K-W Retard, Dave Thompson, Canadian University Press.

Imprint, and the

IMPRINT,

Friday, August 29, 1997

FEATURES

Treeplanting: A. labour of love by Brian special

Kalbfleisch to Imprint

cousin of mine is a tree planter’s tree planter. She consistently plants around 3ooO trees a day and has five or six years of experience planting across Canada for dozens of companies. So, I followed her advice about which companies to apply with -you must be careful of the company you will end up working for - and got a job this summer with a young company in Grande Prairie, Alberta. The season started late, and ended early running from the first week of June to the first week of August. Going in, I knew I wasn’t going to come out a rich man. From what I had heard about tree plantingpreviouslyand from what my cousin was telling me, I knew I couldn’t expect more than a few thousand dollars. Right on. No problem. I’ll get in shape, make enough to reduce my debt load substantially, and have all the gear for next summer. Like many rookies, I viewed this as an investment year; the real cash would come in years to follow. Well, it’s a good thing my financial expectations were low. After two weeks of the hardest labour I have ever experienced, we were heading into town for two days off. Everyone was renewed with the thought of gettingpaid, sleeping in a bed, showering, walking on flat ground, and not tree planting for a day and a half. Even though my backached, my shovel-arm was mangled, I had scrapes and bruises from falling over and off logs, I hadn’t showered more than twice in thirteen days, and my hands, my poor forsaken hands were pulverized, I still felt giddy and excited about the next two days. We would recuperate and finally get a chance to bond under more civilized circumstances. When we got to town, our boss met all of us at the drop off point to give us our checks. Eyes sparkled and hands rubbed feverishly together. Finally our reward for the misery and anguish of the last two weeks. Finally we were on shore leave. After a very lengthy explanation and half apology for how low the checks would seem, our boss handed them over. Now, the vetera?s understood what was happening from the start. It happened to them every year they planted; their first check was low because they were getting back into shape and relearning a bit, no biggie. On the other hand, no warning from friends and cousins about the low pay, and certainly not a last minute appeal from the boss could have prepared the rookies for their measly checks, For my first two weeks of tree planting, work I consider to be the toughest and most frustrating of my short life, I received a net pay of thirty-five

Treeplanting requires nerves of steel, the strength of Samson,thi touch of an artist and hands of. . .duct tape? All tree-elantina

dollars and fifty-three cents, $35.53. My heart sunk to join the dull ache in my ankles. $35.53. At that point-al! the money I had in the world was $35.53. I wasn’t the worst off: I came out in the black. Qne rookie owed the company about eighty bucks. Thank you, sir, for allowing me the opportunity to plant trees for you for two weeks, here’s eighty dollars. Half of Us would have deserted them right then and there if the prospect of cold beers, hot showers and soft beds had not been so close. And besides, thischeck was supposed to seem low. So, the first payment was a bitter disappointment, but so were the ,second and third. I’m still waiting for my last check which should bring my earnings after taxes to about two grand. In equipping myself with the appropriate camping gear, pIanting equipment and getting to and from Crande Prairie, I spent about two grand. Anyway, it was worth it for a number of reasons. The tree planting experience is one ofsuccess, failure, fun, waiting, pain and frustration. It is an adventure from day one. On the first day we were heading into the bush from town in a convoy of pick-up trucks and vans full of tree planters. I was driving my soon-to-be foreman’s truck in the third or fourth position of the convoy. It was about the fifth hot sunny day in a row, so the logging roads, which snaked treacherously through the foothills of the Rocky Mountains, were dry and dusty. The vehicle in front of me kicked up such a dust cloud that it seemed as though we were driving in a thick fog; visibility was at a minimal. So, when a rock the size of a

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basketball suddenly appeared ditruck along the road. Feeling like rectly in my path, I only had time an asshole and fool - my foreto think “that’s a big.. +” before it man meant to live in his truck knocked off the right rear drive m instead of a tent, but now it would shaft of the pick-up. My soon-tohave to sic at the side of a logging be foreman’s pick-up was broroad in the middle of nowhere ken, The convoy stopped after I until someone could tow it back pulled over and soon everyone to town - I apologi-r.ed repeatwas in search for pieces of the edly until we were all herded into

a van and heading deeper into the bush once again. My foreman was only surprised his truck was the only vehicle to break down. One of the camps we stayed in will forever live on in my mind as the dreaded mud camp. I was only there for two days, but know another .week or more there would have finished me, like it did several other planters. The rain started and didn’t stop for seven days. This was no gentle drizzle with intermittent pleasant sunny breaks, it was a heavy torrential downpour for seven days. The camp, located at the side of a dirt logging road, was muddier than Woodstock, only there were no bands, only trees to plant. Six inches of mud covered the road, weighed down every step and sucked the boots off of planters. Huge vehicles designed to drive in mud got stuck, broke down and almost flipped a couple of life threatening times. The tents were located in the bush at the side of the road on the other side of a ditch now filled with rain water. Many a boot filled with water on the way to breakfast in the morning and on the way to bed at night. I have never seen a more demoralized, depressed or miserable group of twentysomethings in my life. Even the most hardened veteran commented it was one of chose experiences that went above and becontinued

to page 28

FEATURES

IMPRINT,

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August

29, 1997

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yond the call of Satan. It was beneath hell. Most tree planting camps are reasonably crazy. The hours between supper and sleep often filled with drinking, smoking, cards, jamming, casual sex and so on. This camp however, was populated with a large number of born again Christians, who were as much a pleasure to work with as stout atheists, but were not so hedonistic as Pagans. Anyway, one of these guys was a Bible buff speaking as though his peers were his congregation. One miserable day, when the rain hadn’t let up for three hours oi so, a few of us were wet, cold, and wondering why the hell we were still planting. Our Christian friend provided us with some inspiration: From *suffering comes perseverance, from perseverance comes character and from character comes hope. Well that’s not quite right, but you get the point. Actually, we decided to stop planting anyway and walked to the van to dry off and sleep for the afternoon. But the point is that tree planting does build character. You are at the mercy of so many overwhelming forces. As on this day, it can rain and rain until you’re soaked through and cold for 10 hours; or the van breaks down halfway back into town; or the wind will blow so hard one day that when you return from a hard day’s toil you discover your tent poles have snapped and your tarp blew off to let in the rain; or you wake up in the morning to discover that you picked a low spot for your tent and it’s surrounded in water; or your supervisor de-. tides that the day off in town will have to be postponed a week because he just discovered another fifteen thousand trees to plant. Ane still more powerful than all of these combined is the mind game. Some planters spend hours at a time sitting down contemplating the real value in planting another tree - it’s only worth thirteen cents, A friend of mine spent two or three hours every day debating with *himself about quitting or staying, napping or planting and basically the meaning of it all: planting trees, slave labour and life. Tree planting is painful. The hours suck, the work sucks and when you’re planting you would rather do anything other than plant. B + 4 /e you rneef some fantastic p - ;;1,, see bears and moose and Lover how well you can har ;le the physical and mental inte&ty that are tree planting. At times you feel as though life could not get worse only to find out that it can and then to learn it gets better again. So if you like getting less than you deserve and get a thrill out of repetitive strain injury, give tree planting a shot. The wounds will heal in time.

the end of the day, treeplanters like to sit down to a good, homestyle meal prepared by some the world’s finest and most distinguished chefs.

IMPRINT,

Friday,

August

FEATURES

29, 1997

Neo-Paganism A religion and a lifestyle by Kimberly Cooper special to Tmprint

The word’s Latin root originally meant something along the lines of “people living in the countryside.” IIistorically, it has come to represent a number of rural, earth-based religious traditions. Today, Neo-paganism refers to the groups and individuals who have renewed those traditions, instilled them with new life and applied them to their own situation in today’s world. The views I express here are solely my own, and I do not claim to speak for the very diverse, Pagan community at targe. I am a solitary eclectic Wiccan. By that statement, I am referring to my chosen path. I follow diverse aspects of many different traditions, whose beliefs best fit myown. I use bits and pieces of many cultures and religions, from the ancient Celts, Greeks, and Egyptians to Christian rituals and Shamanic ceremonies. Creating your own sense of spirituality, or just not forcing your own ideas to fit into the molds of organized religion may be one of the factors in the rise of interest in the occult. There is a sense of freedom and a agan.

I I I I I I I I I 1 1 I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I t I I I I I I I I

lack of structure, dogma and hierarchy. The lack of structure, however, does not mean a lack of ethics. Pagans are not ruleIess. There is the Wiccan rede, “An ye harm none, do what ye will.” This applies to thoughts and actions, and to yourself as well as everything else in the world around us. There is also the “Three-fold Rule,” a karmic code that implies that all energy released into the world, good or bad, will eventually be returned to the sender mag-

their own personal path to the “Divine.” There is also great tolerance of different gender, race, sexual orientation, physical abilities and social status. Pagans may worship alone or worship with groups. Many pagans are members of minority subcultures and feel drawn to the community’s warmth and acceptance. Pagans are people too. Sometimes this is forgotten when we work with definitions. Pagans have families, homes, friends, jobs,

nified by a factor of three. The definitions may sound simplistic, but in practical applications these rules can be very hard to live up to. The flexibility of Paganism is a very important point to discuss. It is from this flexibility that tolerance has developed throughout the community. And there is much tolerance, especially of religious or spiritual differences. There is a widespread belief that everyone must follow

morals, children. They are your next door neighbour, your bank teller, or your pos tperson. Paganism is not a joke, or a phase. It does not exist because people have seen the movie “The Craft” too may times. It is a real, viable and noble spiritual quest. There are many traditions and forms of Neo-paganism. They range from modern Witchcraft known as Wicca, to the ancient Norse religion revival, namely Asatru, to ceremonial Mages, to Faery tra-

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ditions, and to eco-fer&nist spiritual movements. The belief systems vary greatly, yet many of the core values are often the same. There is a reverence and respect for Mother Earth and all things that rest upon her. We are seen as connected to everything around us. Pagans often plant their own herbs and gardens. Environmentalism is strong within the Pagan community, as many of us have become advocates for the Earth and her rights. Many Pagans are polytheists, pantheists or animists. There is a sense that the entire universe is imbued with spirit and power, from the air in the sky and the birds that fly to the rocks beneath our feet and the bugs that crawl over them. The sun, stars and moon may be worshipped as symbols of the divinity imminent in all things. Many Pagans also see the numerous goddesses and gods as incarnations of the One, of the Great Mystery and call themselves Monotheists. Pagans celebrate the natural world. The great festivaIs are often celebrated in the turning of the whee1 of the year as it is denoted by the seasonal changes. Some

continued to page 30

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people are surprised to learn that many of the Christian holidays such as Christmas, St. Bride’s Day and Easter were originally pagan festivals, sometimes called: Yule, Candlemas and Eostre, respectively, Pagan traditions have permeated our culture and still remain today.TheYule log(Christmas Tree), Easter eggs, The May pole and Trick or Treating were all once pagan customs, though today the original meanings have been all but lost. Interest in ecology and the protection of the environment has greatly influenced the revival of Pagan traditions. We hear of more forests being cut, species becoming extinct and landfill sites growing. Materialistic thinking has not seemed to help the plight of the ecosystems of the world and many of us are realizing that we must change our way of thinking and acting before it is too late. Paganism as a paradigm offers the Earth and the people who live on her a second chance: The chance to feel the connection between us and our Mother Earth and indeed our entire universe, through direct experience and interaction. Awareness of the Earth as a spiritual entity leads to a feeling of stewardship and the need to protect what is sacred. Pagan rituals are often performed outdoors and the tools used are usually symbols of the elements of our world. One cannot be a “Sunday Pagan.” It is more than a religion, it is a way of life. People do not become pagan. In many cases

people like myself just realize that “Pagan” is the word for what they always have been. To be Pagan means to be searching for a balance between all the energy in your life. It is to become in tune with the world. Paganism seeps into each of your thoughts and actions, whether you are performing a ritual or washing the dishes. It is an awareness of the energy around us. It isn’t just a choice, it is thecombination ofall the choices we make on a day to day basis. Here in Waterloo, I have met a few Neo-pagans. The number of people who are “out of the broom closet” is often smaller than the number of practicing pagans in the area. There is no real support system for those who are seeking community among others or even for those who would just like to meet others with the same mind set. There no churches, temples or mosques. Book stores or other shops that sell occult supplies are sometimes the only meeting grounds. Often friends or family do not understand our choices and the fear of discrimination by mainstream society is real. We do not need to be converted or saved. We need to be treated with the respect all human beings deserve. Paganism or Neo-paganism is a beautiful celebration of the world in all it’s diversity. For more information on how to help me start a Pagan group within the University community, or for information on Paganism (Wicca in particular) please contact me by email. Write to <kimchris @golden.net> or check out my web site at <http:// www.golden.net/-kimchris/wicca.html>.

IMPRINT,

Friday, August 29, 1997

FEATURES

* The plight of the Lubicon Native Canadians fighting for their lives in a battle thev are finding hard to win rl

by Shirley Hopkins special to Imprint

n the late 1800’s the Lubicon Indians were overlooked by crown agents who were attempting to legitimize their conquest in a shady document called Treaty #8. The Lubicon were far North and their resources were not a major profit maker in the 1~00’s. As a result the Lubicon never signed (or were never forced to sign) away their lands to the Canadian Government. The Lubicon retain aboriginal rights to their land to this day. Around 1935 the Lubicon were “discovered,” and a reserve was negotiatcd, but not final&d. The Lubicon were left alone until 1979 when an all weather road was built into their land. Massive oil deposits had been discovered, and oi1 companies armed with provincial government leases to unceedcd Lubicon Land began drilling over 400 oil wells within a 30 km radius of the Lubicon community. These wells sucked out about $11 bilIion in revenues and totally unbalanced the eco-system that was the Lubicon way of life. Lubicon society is based on huntingand fishing. It wasa healthy self-sustaining society. Almost overnight their society was devastated. The moose, the staple of the Lubicon diet, fled the area along with small game. The traditions and skills of old had no value. The Lubicon, obviously shocked as their land was sold out from under the-m by a govcrnment who claimed to have the power to sell it, began one of the most successful challenges to governmental double dealing and corporate rule in Canadian history. All the while trying to raise kids, hang out and fight a tuberculosis epidmic (late 1980’s) in a community that has no running water, heating or pipes running through it. The Lubicon were on a treadmill of Governmental sabotage, from Alberta courts, whose judges were former oil company lawyers, to reporters who were intimately connected with anti-Lubicon forces and a provincial government who, when the Lubicon made a case in the courts for their future based on Canadian law, retroactively changed those laws to deny the Lubicon their land and recourse to the rule of law. While the Lubicon was in negotiation with the government, the government was selling off parcels of Lubicon land which was being negotiated. In February, 1988, Lubicon Lands were leased to Daishowa for their mill. These

were some of the same lands they had been negotiating about. The provincial government, while leading the Lubicon down the garden path, were shacking up with companies that wanted the Lubicon’s land to log. The Canadian government and the Canadian courts have refused to deal fairly with the Lubicon. So much so that the United Nations ruled in 1990 that “the Lubicon would not be able to achieve fair redress in Canada.” The Lubicon began using grassroots strategies to get the message out that they would not survive the ongoing development of their territory. In 1988, the I ,u bicon went International. The Winter Olympicgames in Alberta were to have a showpiece exhibit caIled “The Spirit Sings,” a collection of indigenous artifacts. The Lubicon informed museums around the world about the history of the Lubicon Land Claim and the sleazy dealings of the Canadian government. The exhibit was shut down and the government’s double dealings exposed on an international stage. It was also an election year, and Brian Mulroney met with Chief Bernard Ominayak of the Lubicon Cree Nation to negotiate treaty terms and rights. Then, after the election, the Federal government cabled a deal they knew would be unacceptable. The Feds then mounted a campaign exploiting anti-native sentiment in Canada with the slogan “Need not greed.” What was also very prominent in the 1988 federal government’s sabotage campaign was the exploitation of general apathy in the press and their readers for the facts when it c’dme to complicated land rights issues. The press was more than willing to keep the headlines to a “Natives get too much” or a “Natives get too little” debate; one where the fundamental issues ofnative self-government and systemic genocide had no place on the editor’s desktop. In 1989, things worsened for, the Lubicon. Daishowa, a pulp and paper company, got the timber rights to all of the unceedcd Lubicon Land from the Alberta provincial government. It was no longer a matter of who or what but when for the Lubicon. The Friends of the Lubicon (FoL) joined, at the invitation of the Lubicon, an enormously successful international boycott of Daishowa. The Friends of the Lubicon wanted Daishowa, the company with logging leases, to commit to not loggingon Lubicon Land until the Federal government negotiated a fair and sustainable settlement with the Lubicon Lake Nation. Daishowaclaims that they are not clearcutting. They also

claim that they are not using or buying any logs or chips from unceeded Lubicon land from subsidary companies. But logging is Daishowa’s long term goal, otherwise why buy the land? Daishowa does not log on unceeded Lubicon land because they have been under boycott for six years. Daishowa first moved to shut down the Friends of the Lubicon in the courts in 1995 in what is called a SLAPP suit (Strategic Lawsuit against Public Participation). Daishowa claimed that they were being wrongfuIIy targeted by the Friends of the Lubicon. I3ut the courts ruled that the boycott was legal. Justice Kitley ruled that the boycott was supporting the Lubicon Lake Nation and not a malicious act targeting Daishowa for no reason. Daishowa appealed the court’s decision. While Daishowa was waiting for their day in court they applied for a temporary injunction to stop the boycott. The initial ruling had not been overturned, but the temporary injunction was granted against a legal boycott. When the Daishowa appeal was heard (October 95) Kitley’s decision was overturned ubecause the boycott hurt the boycotted” (it really said chat), and the temporary ban was still in place. Daishowa is now moving to have the temporary injunction made permanent, as well as suing Friends of the Lubicon Members for millions in damages. This is a first in Canadian law; a precedent is being set that could ban effective boycotts. In effect, you can boycott all you want, but if it works you could be easily shut down. A permanent ban against the Friends of the Lubicon would be the beginning of the clearcutting of democracy. Boycotts could become illega1, and the most effective tool of grassroots movements would be shut down. The purpose of the SLAPP suit is to bankrupt and tie up dissent. SLAPP suits are one sided affairs whose verdicts are decided behind closed doors by those who can afford to keep them open. They are initiated and maintained by companies whose task it is to silence any opposition to their practices of profit at the expense of human life and quell multi-sided public debate. Many people seem to think that a group can challenge these SLAPP decisions in court. But Kevin Thomas, spokesperson for the Friends of the Lubicon explains, “In 1995, the courts ruled the boycott legal. When Daishowa appealed, the judges flung the courtroom doors wide open, heard the case and stopped the boycott. When we [the FoL] knocked, the courtroom doors had twice been locked.. .” The keys to that door are not held by the Lubicon and

their supporters, but by those who can afford to turn them. If Daishowa resumes logging land whose deed is in question, all the while destroying the ecosystem and Lubicon Territory, this precludes any possibility of resolving the Lubicon Land Rights issue. And this, some would contend, is the point. The Canadian government and certain corporate interests know that if the land is destroyed there is nothing to negotiate and the Lubicon people would become “extinct,” meaning that there would be nobody to negotiate with. Daishowa should be subject to a boycott because they refuse to make a commitment not to cut or to buy wood cut on unceeded Lubicon territories

until a land rights settlement is ._ reached. The tria1 of the Friends oL the Lubicon starts on September 2 in Toronto. On September 1, a feast is being held at Council Fire Native Cultural Centre S-8 p.m., 4$9 Dundas St. West. On September 2, a rally wiI1 be held at Toronto’s Nathan Philips Square at 8:30a.m., followed by the start of the trial. Find out more about locat transportation on September 1. Call WPIRG at 8884382. You can also call the FoL hotline at 416-7637500 or e-mail them at cfol@tao.ca>. The Friends of the Lubicon have a trial updater available via your e-mail account by emailing<majordomo@tao.ca> with the following command in the body of message: subscribe fol-1.

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Let the games (begin by Tony Martins special to Imprint

ram B to V, here is a quick look at most of the varsity sports that the University of Waterloo has to offer. For each sport there is a list of the coaches, some of the special accomplishments that the team achieved, and where possible, a quick summary of the previous season, If you want to know more about when and where the teams play their games, pick up a 1997-98 Varsity Team Schedules poster from the PAC. Don’t know where teams play? No problem. Check out our handy, modified Campus Map on page 40, which highlights how to get there. Athena and Warrior Badminton

Athena

Couches: Tom O’Brien, with assistants Kathy Brook and Nancy Gyurcsik. XistmkdHi~hfgks: No team t i tie s. Lust Seus~n: First-year Tom O’Brien led a young Athena team to a 4-10 record, good for sixth spot in the OWIAA West division. Point guard Jodi Hawley had an outstanding season and was named to the division All-Star team. T’..is Sea,san: Hawley and fellow fourth-year pIayers Jacalyn White and Mary Frances Lapthorne will be key performers on an Athena team that returns intact for 1996 97. This strong nucleus, bolstered by what should be a strong class of recruits, has coach O’Brien looking for a very competitive season and a playoff berth.

Comk Dave Meier X~tonkulXi@~ig~ts: Warriors won team OUAA crowns in 1977-78 and 1978-79. Warrior Keith Priestman was OUAA singles champion in 1978-79. Athenas won OWIAA team title in 1973-74. Lust Seam; UW top seeds Dan Frank and Lindy Loh led the Warriors and Athenas respectively to first place in the West Division but fell short of a playoff berth as the fifth best team overall in Ontario. 7Xis &CZSUK The OUA badminton league has m%de changes to provide an even higher level of competition for the athletes, including the introduction offeather birds for competition and a new league format that is similaf to national and international team competitions. UW’s top ranked player Dan Frank returns to lead the Warriors once more in the quest for a playoffspot and a medal in OUA play. Also returning will be 1995 rookie sensation Lindy Loh, hoping to improve on her remarkable rookie year as the No. 2 woman singles player in the province. The solid men’s doubles team of Jeff Sum and Craig Smith will also be reunited, Other notables include Karen Clarke and 1996 QFSSA silver medalist, Emily Strong.

Warrior Baseball

B&k&ball

ever OWIAA and CIAU crowns. Dillabaugh, L&Roy and Kim Langton were named All-Canawhile coach Brent dians, McFarIane was the CIAU Coach of the Year. T&i.. Seus~n: The Athenas are not expected to deiiver a repeat performance now that five of their top seven runners from 1996 have

Warrior

Cross Country

Co&&s: John Swarbrick, with assistant Jason Gregoire. Histuricul HigMgh: Jason Gregoire won 0lJA.A individual title in 1995. Lust Season: The rookie-laden Warriors performed well, but were overshadowed by the dominant

Warrior Basketball

Couches: JP. Soucie. Historical Higdlig.&s: Team is enter ing second year of corntie ti tion. I Last St~son: The Warriors completed their first season with a record of 5 wins and 11 losses. Six of the losses camp in the last innings when the Warriors failed to protect the lead. TIis Season: Last year’s MVP, Danny Murray, and lead-off hitter Vihn Lam have graduated, but a solid returning nucleus has coach Soucie optimistic. “With that first season under our belts we are now dealingwith known entities,” will be a said Soucie. “Pitching key development area.” The Warriors get rolling at Skydome with an exhibition game against Durham College, then commence a l&game regular season.

Cuu&s; Tom Kieswetter, Curt Warkentin (Assistant) HistoticuMigh~ights: CIAU title in 1974-75; CIAU silver in 1973-74 and 197576. Four consecutive OUAA titles from 1973-74 to 197677. Additional OUAA titles in 1982-83, 198586. Last Season: A young squad finished 6th in OUAA West. Defeated Brock in division quarterfinal, 74-68. Lost to MC-vaster in division semi-final, 77-68. T.is Season: Led by 4rh-year All Canadian guard, Mano Watsa, the Warriors are deep, maturing and expected to challenge for the Ieague championship. Gritty guard Pat Gorman has graduated, but the rest of the -team is back, including forward Derek Maat (second leading scorer and rebounder last seasons). The return of 6’7” Mike Scroeder (leading scorer in 199596) will add even more depth.

Athena Cross Country Coaches: John Swarbrick, with assistan t Jason Gregoire. HistotimlHighligAt: No titles prior to 1996. Lust Season: The Athenas’ ‘Cinderella story’ included a fairytale ending last year when Sara Dillabaugb and Judith LeRoy led the unherafded squad to its first

Hysterical MgMig.ks: OLJAA and OWIAA titles in 1996-97. Additional OUAA titles in 1962-63, 1982-83, 1983-84, 1984-85 and 1995-96.

Athena

Figure

Skating

Coa&s: Carolyn Allwrigh t, Dean Phillips. HisturicuJ Xighiighs: 0 WI A A championship in 1985-86 Lust Season: A veteran Athena team hosted the OWIAA championships a&olumbia Iccfield and finished a close second overall behind Queen’s. OWIAA AllStars were Jill ‘Thomson, Erin McKinlay, Lisa Guch, Sharlenc Slatcr and Nancy Ford. ‘Tr&Setis~nz Having lost Thomson, Ford and Helen Atkinson tograduation, the Athenas will bc young and untested.

Athena Field Hockey

took out!

graduated. Dillabaugh, LeRoy, Langton, Sepanta Dorri and Amy Jarvis have all moved on. The Athenas’ rookies from 1996, Kim Ross and Lynn Coon, will have some big shoes to fill. Also, Warrior Cross Country coach John Swarbrick will guide the Athenas as well this season, now that Brent McFarlane has decided to concentrate on coaching UW Track and Field.

ahoto

IN Kimberlev

Moser

Athena team. The team placed 1 lth at the OLJAA finals. This Season: Five rookies from 1996 return for what should be a good year for the Warriors. John Lofrancoand Steven Drew should lead the way.

Athena and Warrior Curling Couch: Dean

Taylor.

&IU&S; Sharon Crcclman, with assistants Liz Czencck and Linda Mowat. Histoticili High/i&s: ow I AA championsjn 199596 (first team other than Toronto or York to win the title). I,ust S’~ti.~o~: The Athenas were again one of the best in Ontario last season, but could not topple York or Toronto and settled for the OWIAA bronze mcdti!. Amy Adair was named a first-team AllCanadian and Hcrnicc Willemsc was named a second-team AllCanadian. 7’2% Seclsutr: The entire Athena squad from last year rotrrrns and coach Sharon Crcclman is Iooking to improve in tho results depaktmcnt. The addition of Lucy Charron (the top player coming out of New Brunswick) and local products Amic Brubacher and Rachel Shantz will bolster an already talented roster. Second-year goalkcepcr Leslie Alexander will play a key role. Warrior

Football

&a&es: Dave “Tuffy” Knight, with assistants Chris Triantafllou (DefensiveCoordinator),and Paul Kilby (Front Seven Coordinator). continued

to page 34

SPORTS

ZMPRfNT,

Friday,

What a year it was. ‘. continued

from

page

Ladkmun: I Ioping to challenge once again for the CIAU title, the Warriors got out of the blocks fast, but faded towards the end of the season. After holding on to the divisitin title with a final game win over. Wind-

Hl’s~~ricrllH&$&g~~~: No titles prior to 1996, Las/Senson:The best Warrior Football campaign ever included Tuffy Knight setting the CIAIJ record for wins by a foorball coach, the team’s first win over Western since 1969, first regular season title (7-1 record) and first playoff win (over Laurier), The team lost to Guelph in the Yates Cup, the OUAA championship game. 2%~ Seusotr: The Warriors will need to adjust to the departure of seniors Adrian Thorne, Rick Shea, Mark McIntyre, Rob Fawcette and particularly Tony Garland a backbone at the rover position. Nevertheless, the Warriors have several fourth and fifth year players and are expecting another highly competitive season. Key returnees include All-Canadians Jason Van Gcel, Jason Tibbits, Martin Barta and Steve Szmanski. Rig things will also be cxpccted of veteran quarterback Ryan Wilkinson and tailback Jarrert Smith (QIJAAMVP in 1996).

Warrior

as an all-around student-athlete and community contributor. T/E& Season: With the departure of captain Steve Smith, Sheldon Gilchrist, Chris Kraemer, MarkCardiff and Marc Vaughan,

August

29, 1997

Steve Lowe of the Ottawa 67s and hIike Johnson from St. Mary’s H.S.

Athena

Indoor

Hockey

CO&XS: Sharon Creelman, with assistants Liz Czencek and Linda Mowat. Hi~botic& H&#..ghts: No team titles. Last Season: A shortage of indoor experience hurt the Athenas, who placed fourth overall in the OWIAA. An injury to leader Sara Creighton was another setback. Bernice Willemse and Michelle Lo were named second team OWIAA All-Stars. 2%~ Season: Veteran and leader Sara Creighton graduates after the Fall term and the Athenas must adjust to her absence. Promising recruits in Lucy Charron, Amie Brubacher and Rachel Shantz should help. Leslie Alexander’s goalkeepingwill be a big part of the defence that coach Sharon Creelman says must improve this year.

Athena

Hockey

Not

even the neutral mne trap can stop the Warriors! photo

C&&es: Don blcKee, with assistants Dave Cressman, Rob Burr. Historicc;rlH~g~i~g~ts: CIAtJ title in 1973-74, CIAU silver medal in 1995-96. OLJAA tities in those same years. Defenceman John Wynne was 1995-96 CIAU Player of the Year.

by Dante1 German

the Warriors are in transition, but should still be among the league leaders, especially if a strong crop of newcomers fulfil1 their potential. These include Rob Marie of the Kitchener Rangers, Waterloo Siskin products Ryan Painter and Louis Coulet,

sor, the Warriors were swept in the first round of the playoffs by Western. Individual highlights included OUAAAIl-Stars Mike Chambers, Joe Harris and Mark Cardiff. Chambers won national recognition when he received the Randy Gregg Award

Nordic

Skiing

Coach: Don McKinnon. HIAMJ&Z~ HjgAljgnts: Five consecutive OWIAA titles from 1980-81 to 1984-85. Athena Patricia Wardlaw was individual OWIAA champion in 1983-84. Last Season: A young but talented Athena squad turned some heads with strong fincontinued

to page 35

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SPORTS ’

August 29, 1997

and what a year it’s gonna be page 34

ishes. At the OWIAA finals, despite the absence of top racer Allison Lampi, the Athenas placed fifth overall. T.&is iG!uson: Veteran Alex Mihailovic, who was hampered much of last season by a virus, has departed. But the key acquisition of Katherine Sodek, a 1997 OWIAA All-Star from Lakehead (now at UW to do graduate work), will bolster an already strong and deep Athena team. Sodck, along with Lampi and Jessica Maier, have the Athenas hoping to challenge for the OUA women’s crown.

Warrior Nordic

Skiing

Coach; Don McKinnon. Hisforidd HigMighfs: 1997 OUAA Champions. Lc3stSeason: After two straight second place finishes, the Warriors found the right combination of youth and experience last season and upset Lakehead for their first OUAAchampionship. BrentCurry and Dave Climie were named OUAA All-Scars, and Curry won the Totzke Trophy as UW’s male athlete of the year. T/tisSeuson=BrentCurry hasgraduaced, Dave Climie is in Switzerland and the inspirational Norm O’Reilly is at grad school in Ottawa. Still, the Warriors believe

however, including Shannon Pennington, Marie Glenn, Anne Marie Infilise, Jill Thomson, Kristie McComb, Myra Lemelin and Tina Moore.

Warrior Rugby Coaches: Derek Humphreys with assistants Jeff Sage, Ian Pryde and Nigel Price. Hisfoticul Highligih..: OUAA title in 1977-78, 1983-84, l98586. Last Season:* The departure of eight seniors left the Warriors rebuilding. The young team lost six of its league matches by a total of 10 points and was relegated to the second division. Stand-out Steve Goodacre was an OUAA All-Star. TZs &us&:Veteran Dale Finaly had graduated, but Goodacre is back along with former OUAA All-Star Adam Downell. Several promising recruits may also bolster the Warriors, including Lindsay Bast and Paul Moser. The Warriors are hoping for a repeat of the 14-O record they compiled the last time they played in the second division.

Warrior Soccer Couch: Ed Edgar. Histo~~~~~~g~ligAts:No team titles. LustSeason: A young team having to deal with a number of injuries

point out of the playoffs. TXs Seu~on: Fraser returns and should again pose a serious challenge to the best players in the league. Matt Arkett and Brian Chin improved greatly over the course of last season and will be counted on for improved play again this year. All told, the Warriors are shooting for a playoff berth in 1997-98.

Athena Swimming CO~L%CS: Brian Cartlidge with assistants Kim Boucher and Albert Bergund. Historidkhghkghts: F ou c consecu tive Ontario swimming and diving titles from 1972-73 to 197576. CIAU title in 1975-76. CIAU championship team inducted into UW Athletic Hall of Fame. Lust Season; A relatively small number of swimmers made things difficult for the Athenas in 199697. The squad placed 9th at OWIAA finals and lQh at CIAU championships. Highlights included strong performances from senior and team captain, Amy Jarvis. T..ti Seuson: Coach Cartlidge has set a modest goal for 1997-98: to simply have a full squad. An expected influx of first-year swimmers with both high school and club experienced should both fill out the roster and raise the level of competitiveness. Replacing Amy Jarvis, a perennial CIAU qualifier, will be no easy task, however. Returning Athena vets will have to step up and work harder should they hope to achieve the demanding CIAU qualifying times. Key newcomers include Leslie Dowson (Whitby), Courtney Mitchell (Pickering) and Lora White (Moortowne).

Warrior Swimming

While the referee was distracted by her coach, this young lady used an illegal foreign object to finish off her opponent. Imprint theycanagainchallenge Lakehead for the OUA title. Veterans Steve Daniels and Brad Frenette will be looked to for leadership and strong performances, while UW’s top male rookie from last year, Ian Murray, will push the pace once again in his second season.

Athena Rugby Coac/tt)s: Eric Ciezar with assistant Brad Miller. Histo~cu~H’iglrligJIts: After two seasons of exhibition play, the Athenas have compiled an even number of wins and losses. This Seuson: Now entering the OlJA league, the Athenas are the new kids on the block, but look forward to the challenge. Several key graduates will be missed,

file photo

made for a Warrior squad that took small steps in 1996, failing to make the playoffs. T/ris Season.- The departure of veteran midfielders Dennis Peeman and Matt Arkett has left sizeable holes for the Warriors to fill. This and a large number of new players expected in the mix will make for a season ofuncertainty for firstyear coach Ed Edgar. Defender Dino Besu and striker Phil Bosco will be key returnees. Warrior

Squash

COU&X: Clive Porter. H&rical Highlights: No team or individual titles. LastSeasotz; Led by #l seed Luke Fraser, a young Warrior team played well and finished just one

Couches: Brian Cartlidge with assistants Kim Boucher and Albert Bergund. Histhd Highlights: Three consecutive CIAU swimming and diving titles from 1976-77 to 197980. Those teams inducted into UW Athletic Hall of Fame. LastSeasotr: Led by CIAU finalist John Milne and super rookie Anthony Tham, the Warriors lacked abundant depth, but placed a respectable 5th at OUAA finals and 17th at CIA&. T,,is Season: Waterloo’s best swimmer over the last few seasons, John Milne, has departed, but a large group of quality rookies has coach Brian Cartlidge optimistic about improved team performances this season. Key additions include Alan Lee (Guelph Marlins), John MacInnes (Cambridge Aquajets) and Craig Wills (Cobra Swim Club). Cartlidge feels hard work will help many returning veterans reach the CIAU qualifying times that they missed by just tenths of seconds last season.

Athena Tennis Co&es: Chris Edwards. Historical ffighlights: Ontario team titles in 1971-72 and 1973-74. hdividud Untario c&mpions: Alison Manning (1982-83) and Carolyn Culik (1991-92). LasdSeuson: A very young Athena team took its lumps and didn’t do much winning. This Season; With no where to go but up, and five second-year players returning from last season, the future looks brighter for the Athenas and their first-year head coach, Chris Edwards.

Warrior Tennis Coaches: Marten Johnston and Dave Constant. Historical HgMghts: No team ti-

ties. Richard Straka won individual titles for UW in 1990,1991 and 1993. Last Seasotr: David Markin was undefeated in regular season play but was upset in the playoffs and settled for the individual bronze medal. Team placed fifth overall. ThisSeusm; Despite the loss ofseniors Albert Tseng and Steve Ahlbert, big things are expected of the Warriors this year. OUAA AliStar Markin returns for his third season, while the team’s 1996-97 rookie of the year, Andrei Tudor, will be counted on for good results.

Athena Track and Field Co&es: Brent McFarlane, assistants Tim Mussar,

continued to page 36

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Did you know

. continued

make the team. Sure, the talent was there, but team owner Marge Schott found his personal views too offensive.

from

page 35

Swarbrick, Gary Wilson, Jeff Miller, Jason Gregoire. Histonml Highlights: No team titles, but 1996 was an excellent season (see below). Last &mwz; Bolstered by the cremendous Athena Cross Country showing, the track team maintained the momentum and was ranked as high as number two in Canada during their season. The Athenas pIaced fourth at OWIAA and third at CIAO championships, where Sara Dillabaugh took gold in the 1000 metres and silver in the 1500 metres. Judith LeRoy won silver in the 3000 and bronze in the 1500. The 4x800 relay team won gold and the 4x400 team took bronze. Brent McFarlane was named OWIAA Coach of the Year, as well as the Imprint Coach of the Year. This Season: The powerful group of middle-distance runners that departed the Cross Country team have also left Athena Track looking for new answers. Dillabaugh, LeRoy, Sepanca Dorri and Amy Jarvis have all graduated, but the Athenas have a strong group of returning sprinters and hurdlers in Rachel Nickie, Jill Bennett and UW’s top Athena rookie from 1996, Heather Moyse. Lynn Coon also returns.

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Warrior

Track

team finished 4th overall at the OUAAchampionships. At CIAUs, the 4x200 metre team was not expected to crack the top six but placed fifth. Thi.&ason: Key returnees include sprinters Tulu Makonnen, Chris Bastie and Chris McPherson. Second-year pole vaulter Bill Miller is the brother of coach Jeff M iller, and has much potential.

Athena

C~XZC~~S: Corinne Williams, assistant Kelvin Hui

with

Warrior

and Field

Takeit? Coack~: Brent McFarlane, wirh assistants Tim Mussar, John Swarbrick, Gary Wilson, Jeff Miller, Jason Gregoire. H&on& Hign/ights= Jeff Miller won CIAU pole vault titles in 1994-95 and 1995-96. Last &mm The Warriors had some strong performances but lacked the depth of talent and experience of the Athenas. The

NO PHONE CALLS APPLY IN PERSON Main Office in E2-1309

Volleyball

playoffs in February. Only an upset of Windsor by Guelph in the final match of the regular schedule kept Waterloo from the OWIAA playofftournament. Middle hitter Colleen Deloyer was named to the OWIAA West: AllStar team. This Semen: Two of the biggest Athena leaders and offensive weapons graduated in the off-season - Collcen Delayer and Ana Kasumovic. This will increase the pressure on third-year players Alyson Woloshyn (setter) and hitters Carrie and Catherine Iierzog. The team’s top rookie, MarieNoelle Lapensee, has much promise and will likely be asked to contribute right away.

photo by Peter Lenardon

team titles. head coach Corinne Williams (a former standout player at Waterloo) had an immediate impact and the Athenas enjoyed a very competitive season, losing in the f”mals’of the Queen’s tournament in Qctober and making a run for the

Hi’sroricalHigAligArs:No

Last Season: Rookie

Volleyball

Conches: Tony Martins, with assistant Will Zabjek. Uist&-~/ HiR/r&~~s: QUAA titles in 1974-75, 1983-84, 1985-86, 1989-90. CIALJ bronze medals in 1985-86, 1989-90, 1990-91 Last Seuson: A young Warrior squad struggled to reach its potential, compiled a 4-8 league record and did not make the playoffs for the first time in many years. A last match win over OUAA West champion Laurier was a sign of good things to come. ZzisS~~.son:‘Everybody back’ is a phrase allcoaches like to hear and the Warriors will have just that this year when all key performers from last season return with a mission to challenge for the division title. Important returnees are captain and second-team OUAA West All-Star, Jason Hubbard, second-year setter Mark Gatto who will run the show, power hitter Jeff Lingard, and secondyear Phil McKee, a versatile attacker.

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ever before in the forty year history of the Warrior Foot ball program has there been this much optimism surrounding the team at the start of a new season. “‘What I like about this year,” says head coach Dave “Tuffy” Knight, “is the fact that the expectations are very high from everyone associated with the University of Waterloo and the Warrior Football program in general.” The high expectations are a result of last year’s dream season. In 1996 the Warriors went 7-l and finished the regular season in first place. They won their first playoff game, made their first Yate’s Cup appearance and beat the Western Mustangs for the first time since 1968. Waterloo also had the most OUAA All-Stars with 16 players selected and four players named

CIAU All-Canadians. Along the way, tail back Jarrett Smith was named the OUAA’s Most Valuable Player and Knight set a new CIAU record for career wins by a coach. Another reason for all the excitement is the fact that this year’s squad is virtual!y unchanged from 1996. Waterloo lost only four players to graduation and a majority of this year’s team will be in their senior year. As a result, the 1997 Warriors are looking to build on last year’s momentum, and are hoping to continue the trend of first time accomplishments by making a Vanier Cup appearance. In 1997, Waterloo will be led by its veteran defensive unit. On the line, all three starters return from last season. OUAA All-Stars Rob McMutren and Richard Riha are back along with third-year star Richard Hock. With solid performances, both McMurren and Riha should be candidates for All-Canadian honors. As well, Hock’s quick-

ness should add to this talented line. Back-ups Christian &horn, Wes Morley and Al Lang also look impressive. At linebacker, the Warriors are solid with All-Canadian Jason Van Gee1 and OUAA All-Star Kevin Pressburger. Van Gee1 has been one of the top linebackers in Canada the past two seasons. He has also contributed to the offensive side of the ball as a shortyardage full back. Pressburger will continue to be the Warriors passrush specialist. In 1996 he had 36 tackles, 25 quarterback hurries and eight quarterback sacks, The two remaining linebacker positions will likely be filled by sophomores Daryl Tharby and Nathan Martin. Tharby was one of the Warriors top recruits last season and performed well during spring camp while Martin hascontinued to improve from last season. Also watch continued

to page 37

Friday, August 29, 1997

IMPRINT,

SPORTS

The Gold and Black attack is back continued

from

page 36

for back-ups Jamie Whitty, Troy Caspi and Adam Terrenzio. At defensive back, there is plenty of competition for spots. The Warriors look solid atcornerbackwith All-Canadian Jvn Tibbits and Eric Pauyo Jr. Tibbits, who had five interceptions last season, surprised many teams with hisoutstandingplay. With another year of experience under his belt, he should be even more dangerous in 1997. Pauyo Jr. earned the starting job half-way through last season and has shown that his quickness and speed are second to none. His emotional style of play and showmanship also make him one of the most exciting Warriors to watch. Fifth-year Safety Shawn Dyson also returns for 1997. Dyson was an All-Canadian in 19% and should repeat that honour this season. He also enters his second year as team captain. However, the two remaining spots in the Warriors black storm are not as solid. The rover and second safety positions are wide open. Being considered for either job will be juniors Ted Siountres and Jeff Rendell and seniors Trevor Trod, Tory Locker and BIane BelI. Others competing for spots are Greg Bourne, Martin Reid, Tony Shaughessy, Brandon Bagnall, Mike Laporte, Jeff Shiau, Brian Surprenant and Chris Neale. On the other side of the ball, the Warriors also look strong. Waterloo could have

the best one-two running back combination in Canada with tail back Jarrett Smith and full backs Eddie Kim and Doug Haidner. Smith rushed for over 1000 yards in 1996 for the second consecutive year and was the OUAA’s Most Valuable Player. Kim was impressive last season rushing for over 400 yards, while Haidner is almost completely unstoppable after putting on 15 lbs. in the off season. Also watch for

All-Canadian honours. The remaining spot wiil likely be fiiled by senior Dave Wright or Paul Squigna, who returns to the Warriors after taking a year off. However, don’t count out back-ups Geordie Given, Ted Low, Simon Mackintosh or Mike Lang. At wide receiver, Colin Alie is back and Andy MacGregor has already taken the spot left by Adrian Throne’s departure. MacGregor will be exciting to watch as his

Expect to see a lot of this in the upcoming season. photo

back-ups Aaron Bygrove, Soy Ward and Brian Belbeck. On the offensive line, the situation could not be better because four of the five starters are returning. All-Canadians Martin Barta and Stephen Szimanski are back along with OUAA All-Star Dan Sendecki and third-year star Chris Bercoia. With strong performances, all four should be OUAA All-Stars as well as candidates for

by Dave fisher

quickness and speed are among the best in the league. His talent and toughness should turn a few heads. Also watch for back-ups Chris Krebich, Danny Im, Brian Garipy, Benjie Thomas, Matt Farrell, Cort Fowler, Kwame Smart and Charles Stevens. At quarterback, the Warriors look strong with senior Ryan Wilkinson returning. Although last season was physically painful for Wilkinson, he still threw for over 1000

and rushed for over 500. When healthy, Wilkinson is one of the most dangerous quarterbacks in the league. He can avoid the rush by taking the ball himself just as well as he can throw it 40 yards down the field for a score. Backing-up Wilkinson will be Ryan Butler or Jeff McConkcy. The only possible weakness for the Warriors in 1997 couid be at slotback. However, the coaching staff has made several moves in the off-season to climinate this problem. Only two natural slotbacks with game experience return for 1997: Chris Amey, who broke his arm severely over the winter, and John Kublinskas. As a result, Jeff Matthews and Ryan Skrobar were temporarily moved to slotbackfrom wide receiver and linebacker during spring camp. No decision has been made as to whether or not either of these moves will be permanent. Also watch for back-ups Andrew Greszyzsyn and Clayton Magnus. Last, but certainly not least, the Warriors special teams should once again dominate. Field Goal Kicker/Punter Arek Bigos returns for his fifth and final season at Waterloo. In 1996, Bigos was the only player in Ontario to earn All-Star status at two positions as he was named an All-Star Field Goal Kicker and Punter. Return specialist Andy MacGregor and special teams coverman Ted Siountres were also recognized as OlJAA All-Stars for their stellar play in 1996. yards

111 PARTICIPANTS REQUIRED FOR CONTACT LENSL. RESEARCH The Centre for Contact Lens Research, located in the School of Optometry at UW, will be conducting a number of studies on various types of contact lenses over the next year. Individuals who are at least 18 years old and currently wearing contact lenses are being sought to participate in these studies. Time commitment will depend on the particular study requirements. Participants will be compensated for their time at the completion of the study.

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If you are interested in participating in contact lens research, please call 519-888-4742 (on campus, exL4742)or email Leona at Ivoss@sciborg.uwaterloo.ca for more information.There is no obligation to participate.

All studies conducted by the Centre for Contact Lens Research have been reviewed and have received ethics approval by the Office of Human Research, University of Waterloo (519-888-4567, ext. 6005).

What’s going on in Campus Ret by Tony Martins special to Imprint

he fall term is always the biggest and busiest on the Campus Recreation (CR) scene and Fall 1997 will be no exception. Would be recreators should take note of the dates and other information below. Waiting lists for the more popular classes and leagues are becoming a COMmon occurrence. Don’t be disappointed - register early! Registration Dates-For competitive and co-recreational leagues, chc big registration dates are Monday and Tuesday, September Hand 16. Ononeofthese two days, team captains or representatives must go to the PAC Red Activity area to register their teams (Monday between 4 p.m. and 6 p.m.; Tuesday betweeen 10 a.m. and noon). Entry forms must be complete with captain’s name, phone number, e-mail and ID number. All fees must be paid at this time as well. Individuals who want to play in a league but are not hooked up with a team may also register at this time. Such individuals must also attend a meeting on a later date to be placed on a team. Indi-

viduals can also register by e-mail before Tuesday, September 16 at 11 a.m. Send registration info to jwcasca&ha&rvl.uwatedo0da For most instructional offerings(i.e. fitness, aquatics, racquets sports, healthy living, and the new Skills & Drills classes) the big registration dates to note are Tuesday, September 16 and Wednesday, September 17. On the 16th, from 8 a.m. to 1 p.m., those wanting to register must go to the PAC Red North area (follow the signs) to pick up a registration ticket. Each ticket bears a time at which the holder should return to the PAC main office to select and pay for courses. This second stage takes place on both September 16 and 17, between 4 p.m. and 9:30 p.m. in PAC 2039. Here are some of the clubs that you can join with Campus Rec.

Archery Archery is a year-round sport that is easy to learn, but difficult to master. For beginners, we offer basic instruction and can provide all the essential equipment. More experienced archers can practice their skills in a relaxed or competi-

tive setting. Coaching is available up to the National Level. Whatever your experience, the Archery Club welcomes you to join.

or death dueling of bygone days. We’ve all seen swashbucklers in the movies, such as Princess Bride, and I’m sure you’ve secretly wanted to try it out! Our club provides the use of all fencing equipment for its fencers, including the three weapons: foils, epees and sabres, and the protection: jacket, gloves and masks, and even electrical scoring equipment. We even provide lessons for beginners and intermediate fencers, all for a surprisingly low per-term fee! Our World Wide Web Site is located at <http:/lwww.csclub.uwaterloo.ca/ clubs/fencing>.

Badminton Badminton does more for you than most people think! It improves hand-eye co-ordination, agility, and, mental strategy (WOW!!!). blast of all, it’s FUN! It can be played in any kind of weather. All levels of play are welcome, from the curious beginner to the seriouscompetitor. Participate in the Club’s “Pizza/ Movie,” B BQ events and the InClub tournament held during the term, We supply the birds, nets, and “quality” racquets. For a regularworkout and a wonderful time, join and discover what it’s all about! Check out OLJ~ page on the World Wide Web at: <http:// www.csclub.uwaterloo.ca/club/ badminto>.

Juggling Newton was wrong! Come out and defy the laws of gravity with the UW Juggling Club. Unicycles, rubberchickens, flaming torches, balls, clubs, rings - we have it all! It’s fun! It’s easy! No special fitness or coordination rcquired: all you need is a sense of fun, and we’ll show you the rest. Join the IJW Juggling Club, the finest juggling club on campus! We’re on the World Wide Web at: <http://mercator,uwaterloo.ca/ -mgacrawf/juggle/juggle.hcml>.

Fencing The sport of fencing has its origins in the honourable art of dueling. There is the same thrill in the modern sport whose rules are designed to simulate the real life

Kendo Kendo means “the way of the Sword” and has evolved from 2000years of tradition of the Japanese Samurai. Kendo is based on self-discipline and philosophies of Japanese culture and martial arts. A balanced exercise of mind, sword and body is emphasized in class. Kendo is based on good technique, speed, and agility. This is a good opportunity to work out, meet new friends, and learn about Japanese culture. One hour beginners’ classes are held two or three times a week. Everyone is welcome!

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The UW Rowing Club has two recreational singles available for use by club members. They are located at Columbia Lake and are accessible at any time. Club members also have exclusive use of two rowing ergometers located in the weight room warm up area. Instruction will be offered for either activity at several different times so everyone from expert to novice will be able to participate and enjoy in the growing and exciting sport of rowing.

Martial

Arts

The Martial Arts Club promotes the art and science of using

the body and the mind to neutralize an attack. The Martial Arts Club provides instruction for men and women in the arts of Aiki jujutsu, Karate, and Tae Kwon Do. lfyou have always wanted to learn a Martial Art but have never had the opportunity before, come out to a class and give it a try. Martial Arts are an excellent means of obtaining and maintaining physical and mental fitness. All instruction is provided by qualified Black Belts and their assistants. We are located on the web at: <http:// math.uwaterloo.ca:8()/-klmartinl martial.arts/MarrialArts.html~.

Outers Are you interested in paddling through rapids, hiking along cliff tops, skiing on trails or lazing around a campfire? ‘T’hc Outers Club can help you organize such events and more. To get you and your friends started, we offer advice, workshops and a variety of equipment available for rent at extremely reasonable rates. We also offer scheduled kayaking scssions in the PAC Pool. WC are always looking for people with suggestions for new activities so let your imagination go wild! Check us out on the World Wide Web, via the IJW I Iome Page.

Sailing and Windsurfing For those who spend the da) staring out the window waiting for the wind, the Windsurfing ;lnd Sailing Cllub is for you. Our six hoards (Alpha 130 F, 2-160’s. 180; I3ic Khumba & I’rc’sto) :lnd one Sunfish arc avtiilable on tin unlimited basis to 311 members who show a certain level of sailing and/ or surfing proficiency. For mcmbcrs who are beginners, WC offer introductory iessons in both sailing and windsurfing by qualiticd members at N(> charge. Marc advanced clinics could be arranged if thcrc is sufficient dcmand. Sailorsand non-sailors alike are invited to participate in the club’s executive. ‘The club owns windsurfing video tapes which are available for sign out. If you miss the meeting, you can still sign up for the club in PAC 2039.

Sky Diving Experience the freedom ;Ind exhilaration of sky diving with the IJW Sky Diving club. An increasing number of students arc making their first leap into sp~e from a four or six passenger airplanc at 3000 feet with the help continued

to page 41

IMPRINT,

Friday,

August

SPORTS

29, 1997

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AREA1 - TheColumbia kefields, locatedNorth of ColumbiaStreet off the shoresof ColumbiaLakeextendingall the way to the Columbia Recreation Complex. These are home to Varsity Soccerand Rugby.CampusRet also usesthese fields for Soccer,Slo-Pitch, and Flag Football. AREA2 - TheColumbia RecreationComplex, located North of ColumbiaStreet,enter at the stoplights at the North Entrance.This containsa gymnasiumand an arena,The arenaplayshost to the Varsity Hockeyteam. CampusRet usesthis building for Hockey, Broomball,Ball Hockey,Volleyball,In&;: Soccer, and other indoor sports. AREA3 - ThePhysicalActivities Complex, right besidethe Stu ~7:Life Centre off Ring Road.You can’t miss it. This is the main physical activities centre.Just about every indoor sport and activie , housed here, at the Varsityand CampusRet levels.It containsa gym, weight rooms, a pool, 19 squashcourts, and UpperActiv’ Y Areasthat can housea wide variety of activities from Martial Arts to PingPong. AREA4 - Universi@Stadrc?, on SeagramAvenuesouth of UniversityAvenue. Formerlyknown as SeagramStadium,it playshost to a Footballgame everyweek during the seasonas both the WaterlooWarriors and the LaurierGoldenHawksusethe stadium,which unfortunatelyhasa big ChickenHawk on the artificial turf at midfield. So much for home-field advantage.It also playshost to Varsity Field Hockey.

IMPRINT,

Friclay, August

SPORTS

29, 1997

Getrec-ed continued

from

page 38

uf ;1,ntitionl-llly certified instructor and using modern square parachutes. Advanced skills will also be available for those who wish to continue, possibly attaining their license cerrificate of proficiency. ‘The club membership gives students a discount on the first jump training course, plus a ride out: co the drop zone. ‘I’ransportacion will be organ&d most weekends (weather permitring) to SWc)C>P (South West OnrarioOrK:anization ofParachutists) in &and Rend, Ontario.

Table

Tennis

The world’s second most popular sport can bc pl;1ycd at rhc Table Tennis club. rf you want to improve your rcflcxcs or if you want to think or read faster, this truly amaCcur sport is for you. Pla-yers of any calibre arc wclcomc co LJSC cxculIcnt playing f3cilitics which incltrdc high quality tables, nets and lots of room. A Iimited si~pply of racquuts will hc provided. Gu-npus Recreation ulsooffers instructional courses in Fitness, Aquatics, Racquets, I Icalthy Living Skills, Martial Arts and Kcd Cross. Employment and Volunteer OpportunitiesEach term Campus Recreation employs as many as 300 students and relies on dozens of volunteers to effcc-

with CRthis

riveiy run programs. Students can earn valuable experience and pick up some extra cash as referees, league conveners, lifeguards, fitness and skills instructors, program coordinators and other administrative roles. Volunteer opportunities are plentiful as well. They include the aII-important Campus Rccrcation Council, the bidy that represents the UW community and advises Campus Recreation staff on policies and programs. The Ret Pals program is another great way to get involved by helping a person with a disability enjoy the CR offerings, and the CR Club Executive opportunities offer experience in budgeting, program development and leadership. For details about employment and volunteer activities, drop by PAC 2039 or consult the Incredible Campus Recreation Guidebook (see below). The great big Guidebook-It’s back, and bigger than ever! It’s the Inc~f&He Cmprrs Rem-&m Guidehok, a JO-pagetour defom of Campus Ret material. Available al the PAC office, the Student Life Centre and in many building foyers across campus, the newly-designed Gtii&&~ok is chock full of info, photos, schedules and program descriptions. It’s got everything you’ll ever need to know about Campus Recreation for the fall of 1997 and the many new offerings this term that include: l four new lifeguarding courses, including instructor certifications

on all in stockbikesAug.16 - Sept.6

l a private, one-on-one, Learn-to-Swim course . courses in weight room orientation and weight training for the disabled ‘0 a course designed to prepare alpine skiers for the physical challenge of the coming season l new Skills & Drills offerings in volley-

Imprint

year ball, soccer, ultimate and basketball l co-ed sections in some competitive sports leagues l co-recreational soccer and basketball leagues PAC(Physica1 Activities Complex) Satutday hours have been lengthened from 6 p.m.-closing to 10 p.m. closuing.

Sports

4 life

The Federation of Students needs a full slate of student councilors to keep the organization running smoothly in the best interests of all students. Councilors guide the FEDS’ executive in making important decisions for undergraduates at UW. Every undergraduate pays to help operate the FEDS. Here is your opportunity to have your say!

STUDENTS’ COUNCIL FALL 1997BY-ELECTION Engineering Optometry AHS Co-op Renison Science Co-op Independent Studies

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IT’S

SPORTS

IMPRINT,

The Cheese stands alone

Friday,

August

29, 1997

.:: .

RB Dorsey Levens and TE Mark Chmura. Defensively? They’re almost air-tight. Believe it or not, the Tampa Bay Buccaneers are the best bet for second place. A great coach, a bevy of young players accrued through years of horrible play and solid drafting, and a quarterback who’s hopefully finished with his growing pains. They boast three solid running backs in Warrick Dunn, Errict Rhettand Mike Alstott, plus a defensive front four all under 27 years of age. They lack the experience to win big, but they know all too well what it takes co lose. In 1995, Detroit’s offense had a marvelous year, with two l(K)+ catch receivers, the best running back in football and a strong-armed quarterback. Unfortunately, the team also had to play defcnse, and they didn’t go anywhere. With the woeful Wayne Fontes replaced ascoach, look for the team to rebound from a horrible 1996 season. The offense shotlId rebound, now running a conven tional offense which should allow Barry Sanders to put up even better numbers. The Jet‘cnsc is still poor, but they may just try this year. Chicago is close, but not quite there,

Cox

They’ve

Rclt the fiery

Last year, the Jucksonville Jaguars and the Grolina I%nEhers cmbarrassed everyone in the NFL who didn’t make the Super Bowl. This year, everyone wilt be gunning for them. On paper, Carolina looks like a better team than last year, with KB Tim Biakabituka back from knee stirgery, a year for QB Kerry Collins and TE Wesley Walls tobuild greatchemistry, and the besr: linebackers in football getting even better with the addition of former Oiler LB hlichael Barrow. Their schedule will be interesting, with four easy wins against Atlanta and New Orleans, but with games against Dallas, Green Bay and Denver. Sacking LB Kevin Greene was released (and signed by the 4Yers) after a contract dispute and CoIlin has a broken jaw, but cuxh Dam Capers; will once again get the most out of his players.

Bryan

at linebacker,

two outstanding CBS in Walt Iiarris and ‘I’om C:artcr on dcfense, but tht‘ offcnsc is suspect. The 013 shuffle is on, with the reccntl~

Brett Favre, two time MVP in the National Football League, will once again lead the Green Bay Packers from the frozen tundra of Lambeau Field to the promised land. www.greenbaypackers.com

NFC East Jeff Spitzig

A review of the NFC East always has to begin with the Dallas Cowboys. For the last several years they have been the team to beat, and even though they are not the team that they were a few years ago, they still have a solid core of offensive and defensive stars. Dallas still has a great offense. They didn’t live up to expectations last year because almost everyone broke down with the exception of QB Troy Aikman. The Cowboys receiving core was devastated because TE Jay Novacck was injured all season and WR Michael Irvin was suspended for the first five games. Running back RB Emmitc Smith had several injuries throughout the course of the season and was not very effective. That is not all. The Cowboy’s offensive line was fat, out-of-shape and suffered through a few injuries. This year though things are looking better for the Dallas offense. Dallas picked up WR Anthony F+Iiller in the off-season. Emmitt Smith should return to his old self, and the offcnsive line should play a little better. While things are looking good for the Dallas offense, the defense is really suffering. DE Charles Haley has retired, and DE Leon Lett won’t be back from his drug suspension

until early November. On tht: bright side, the Cowboy’s defensive backs are very strong because of Deion Sanders, Kevin Smith, and Darren Woodson. Another strong team in the NFC East are the Philadelphia Eagles. The Eagles have a good, well balanced team. Having both good offense and defense, the Eagles are hampered only by not having a big name quarterback. Philadelphia is a Brett Favre or a Steve Young away from a Superbowl. The Washington Redskins are coming back from a very disappointing 19% season, where they narrowly missed the playoffs. After winning seven of their first eight games, they only managed to win two of their final eight as the team’s defense died a very abrupt death. This year, the Redskins look to make the playoffs after axing most of’ their defensive staff, including the defensive coordinator. The Washington offense should have another solid season, probably even improving on last years’ ninth ranked offense. The Redskins added same depth ac quarterback by adding QB Jeff Hostetler in the off-season. ‘ To help bolster their WR core, Washington also picked up Alvin Ilarper from Tampa Bay. The key for the Washington Redskins this year will be their run defense. Last year, the Redskins had

the worst run defense in the NFL,. ‘l’heacyuisition ofCB Chris Dishman might help lift some of the pressure. The Arizona Cardinals have too many weaknesses to bc a real threat. Among them are: a weak offensive line, not much of a running game, and weak defense. Perhaps now that Buddy Ryan (what a loser) is gone, the Cardinals defense should improve. The New York Giants. What can I say about the Giantsexcept that they suck. They had the worst offense in the NFL last year, and only average defense. After changing their head coach and defensive coordinator, the Giants are expecting more from their offenseand a better showing this year.

acquired

Kick

hlircr

open-

Erik Kramer starting.l‘ithcr way, they’ll hrlnd the ball rll’f to I<aymont Harris ;Ind Kashaan SAaam most of the time, or pass it co the emerging

WK Bobby Engram until injured \Vli Curtis Conway comes back. While they do have talent, the Minnesota C’ikings have never m;mDennis Green gets the most out of what he has, but it’s generally not enough, and every season, the rumours of his firing run rampant. QB Brad Johnson has half a year under his belt, but is throwing to the best receiving duo in the NFL in WRs CrisCarterand Jake Reed. RB Robert Smith can get the job done, but is far too fragile to be a featured back. ‘l’he defense is, at best, middle of the pack, with John Randall as the only standout.

NFC West by Greg

year’s

in football,

team

(minus

Picken

only

Sean

Jones, and now injured RR Edgar Bennett), they’ll once again present an intimidatingpresenceon both sides of the ball. Brett Favre will continue to be the best Ql3 in the NFL, well compIimented by WRs Antonio Freeman, Robert Brooks and Don Beebe,

with

1997 NIX

Standings

E’inal

lkdictions

EAS’I

DalIas Cowboys 10 x - Philadelphia EaglcslO Washington Kedskins 8 Arizona Cardinals 6 New

As they are the favorites to win the Super Bowl, and widely considered the class of the NFL, it’s likely the Green Bay Packers will capture the very competitive NFC Central. Returning 21 of 22 starters from last

by Greg

Imprint’s

York

Giants

6 6

8 10 13

Picken

In was a disconcerting year in San Fransico last year, but hopefully for 49er fans, their team will once again sit atop the NFC West. With a healthy SteveYoungat QB, throwingto the alluniverse Jerry Rice or TE Brent Jones, handingofftonew RR Garrison llearst or running the ball on his own, they’ll put up good offensive numbers. On defense, they have the best front line

ff FC Central

quarterback.

Bryant

Young,

Ilana

Stubblefield, Chris Doleman and Roy Barker, plus quality linebackers and rl strong secondary. The only question marks are new coach Steve Marriuoi, though he was once a coach in San Fran, and who will replace JeffWilkins as a dependable kicker.

CENTRAL Green Bay Pack xrs

x - Tampa Bay Buts Detroit Lions Chicago Hears Minnesota C’ik rigs

10 8 8 t3

2 4 8 8 8

WEST San Fransisco 49crs x - Carolina Panthus St. Louis Rams

5 L

11 14

New Orleans Saints Atlanta Fal~r)ns x- wildcard

Super

Bowl

Green

Champions

Ray Packers

IMPRINT,

SPORTS

Friday, August 29, 1997

Broncos stampede AFC AFC by Jeff

East Peeters

The New England Patriots, aftermakingittolastycar’sSupcrBow1, lost the coach that helped get them there. Coach Bill Parcclls, wanting more control over personnel decisions, left the team in the off-season, opting to sign with the New York Jets, in what was a rather messy episode.Taking his plaoc is Pete Carroll, who just isn’t rhe big tuna. A key for the I’atriots this year will be hou compatible Q,)R I)rew Rledsoc is with Carroll. Ilow will Bledsot: react lo Carroll’s difference in philosophy from Parcells? Will Bledsoe continue to dominate or will Mr. Happy-Feet make his not-sotriumphant return? The Patriots will also have to run the ball better, with Curtis Martin being called on to carry the brunt of the workload. Although many of the players are the same, there are some coaches thatjust can’t be replaced, and Parcells probably took about one or two wins with him to New York. Still, look for the Patriots to hold on to the division title. The Miami Dolphins success will rest on one man’s arm: Dan Marino. The Dolphins may fmally have a running attack with Karim AbduiJabbar, they may have some great young talent, and they may have Jimmy Johnson as their coach. But this team, as always, will rise and fall with the declining Marino who’s looking for one last shot at a Super Bowl. The Dolphins look like they may be a team to watch out for in the future, and Johnson seems to have a knack for doing this, but they may be a year or two away from the big show. Still, this team has shown much improvement, and a healthy Marino could sneak them into the playoffs. The Buffalo Bills return last year’s defence, one of the best in the league, and boastapotentiallydangerousrush-

Imprint’s 1997 AFC Final Standings Predictions EAST New England x - Miami Dolphins Buffalo Bills Indianapolis Colts New York Jets

10 9

6 7

7 5

9 11

CENTRAL Pittsburgh Steelers 10 x - Jacksonville Jaguars 9 Cincinnati Bengals 8 Baltimore Ravens 6 Tennesee Oilers 6

6 7 8 10 10

WEST Denver Broncos x - Kansas City Chiefs Seattle Seahawks Oakland Raiders San Diego Chargers x - wildcard

Super Bowl Finalist Denver

Broncos

12 IO 8 5

4 6 8 11

ing trio in RB Thurman Thomas, RB Derrick Holmes, and rookie RB Antowain Smith. Of course, the retirement of Hull hurts an already weakened offensive line, and neither QBs Todd Collins nor BilIy Joe Hobert are Jim Kelly. Of course in the past couple of seasons, Jim Kelly h asn’t been Jim Kelly either. The infamous K-Gun offence has been scrapped, and time will tell just how well the Bills can adjust. The Dills are being underestimated by just about everyone, but if Collins or Hobert can play decent, the Bills might squeak into the playoffs, or at least make it close. Look for this to be the definitive turn-around year in the fates of these two rival franchises, with Miami on the way up, and Buffalo on the way dbwn. The Indianapolis Colts fell a long way last year, from coming within a Hail Mary of the Super Bowl two years ago, to a living room seat for last year’s playoffs. While the offence struggled with injuries, Jim Harbaugh and Marshal1 Faulk return healthy, and the Colts should improve on offence. But it may not be enough to compensate for their defence. This is a tough division, and the Colts are a good team, but probably not quire good enough. They’ll make things interesting, but will finish out of the playoffs. The New YorkJets will win more games than they did last year. Look for Parcells to at least start bringing this team to the brink of respectability. This team seemed to find ways to snatch defeat from the jaws of victory last year, and Parcells will not stand for any of that this year, or else heads will roll. Look for WR Keyshawn Johnson to get whipped into shape by Parcells or getsent elsewhere by the end of the season. QB Neil O’Donnell should get a rude awakening as well. The Parcells factor alone could add about four wins to this team, and then maybe people will stop laughing at them. A .400 record would be asking too much at this point, but anything would be an improvement over last year.

AFC Central by Jeff

Spitzig

With the injury to the Jacksonville Jaguar’s QB Mark Brunnell, look for the Pittsburgh Steelers to finish on top of the Central again this year. One of the major reasons for this is that they wil1 have a strong running game again this year; RB Jerome Bettis is a beast. What the Steelers are more worried about, however, is their passing game. QB Kordell “Slash” Stewart is an amazing athlete, a good wide receiver, and has the ability to be a good runner. But can he pass the ball accurately? If Kordell turns out to be more than just a “thrower”, then Pittsburgh’s offense will be a force to be reckoned with in the AFC. This season, the Steelers will again rely on a very strong offensive line. Pittsburgh had the second best defense last year, but this year their

defense is almost unrecognizable. First of all, they Iost their defensive coordinator, Dick LeBeau to the Bengals. They also lost their three best corners to free-agency, and also gone is big bad LB Chad Brown. On the plus side, LB Greg Lloyd is finally back after recovering fram tearing his patellar tendon during last season’s opener and should be 100 percent. This year, there is no doubt that the Jacksonville Jaguar’s offense will be mourning the loss of Mark Rrunell for the first five \J*eeks or so, but the? can survive without him, QB Rob Johnson, who looked impressive against the 49ers in preseason, will get the start until then, The key for the Jaguar offense will be Natron Means. When hsleans is on his game, he makes defensive players look like they learned how to tackle from playing little girls soccer. The Cincinnati Bengals are also looking to challenge for the lead of the AFC Central. The Bengals have a great offense with QB Jeff Blake hitting WR Carl Pickens more often than Mike Tyson used to hit his wife. RB Ki-Jana Carter will start at running back even though he has never lived up to his reputation in the NFL. The Bengals are hoping that he will regain his confidence and show some of the brilliance that he exhibited in college. Cincinnati had the second worst rated defense against the pass in the NFL last year. In an effort to rectify this, head coach Bruce Coslet axed his entire defensive staff and acquired Dick LeBeau from division-rival Pittsburgh. LeBeau is known for the zone-blitz package that he helped engineer in Pittsburgh The Oilers move from Houston toTennessee hasn’t changed the fact that they are still the Oi1ers. They are a mediocre team; don’t expect them to make the playoffs. WhiIe the Oilers had a good defense last year, they will have trouble filling the hole that the loss of key starters DB Chris Dishman and LB Micheal Barrow created. With running backs Eddie George and Ronnie Harmon, Tennessee should have a good running game this year. The Baltimore Ravens almost have the AFC Central basement locked-up already. The only element that the Ravens can count on is their powerful pass offence led by QB Vinny Testeverde. Testeverde is coming off of a 4000 yard and 30 TD season and yet the team still finished 4-12. Doesn’t say much for the worst defense in the NFL.

AFC by Jeff

West Peeters

The big question that will be answered this NFL season will concern the Denver Broncos. Last year they ran away with the conference, taking advantage of a weak division to run up an inflated 13-3 record. However, their weaknesses were exposed by a hot Jacksonville Jaguars team that upset them in the playoffs, ending a season of great expectations.

John Elway will be called upon to boost the Denver Broncos to a Super Bowl win, a level that has so-far eluded this perennial all-star.

However, unlike the Kansas City Chiefs, who had done the same thing two years ago, Denver will not fall from grace nearly as quickly. QB John Elway, desperate for one more chance at a Super Bowl ring, renegotiated his contract so that room could be made under the salary cap to sign what the Broncos hope are the missing pieces ofthechampionshippuzzle.Themost notable signing was former Chiefs DE Neil Smith, a five-time Pro Bowl selection, who should help bolster an already excellent defence. The Broncos should run away with the division, and will probably take advantage of a weakened AFC to give John Elway one last shot for glory. The only team that may give the Broncos a scare is the Kansas City Chiefs. The Chiefs continued their reputation as a old-boys club for former San Francisco quarterbacks by acquiring QB Elvis Grbac to replace QB Steve Bono, who fel1 out of favour with the club after last year’s collapse. Add WRs Brett Perriman and Andre Rison and you’re looking at a potentially dangerous offence. But it works both ways. Perriman and Rison are not known for having the greatest attitudes, so look for them to have the biggest impact on how this team performs. The defence lost DE NielSmith, but changed its scheme which will still be anchored by DerrickThomas. This will probably be the thing that keeps KC from unseating Denver, though. Still, the Chiefs may very well be good enough to make the playoffs.

Seattle made many improvements in the offseason, and the\ needed it. Gone is QB Rick hfirer and QB John Friesz was named as the new starter. That is, until he suffered a season-ending knee injury that is. Now QB Warren Moon has been brought out of the mothballs to lead the Seahawks. However, the big improvement came on defence, which now fcaturei: LB Chad Brown, CB Willie Williams. and rookie CB Shawn Springs, The Seahawks have become respectable. They’ll contend, but will fall jusr short of the playoffs, exposing the need for a better offensive unit. The Oakland Raiders attempted to improve themselves by acquiring QB Jeff George and WR Desmond Howard. Did they go backward or forward is the question that should be asked. No matter how hard the Raiders try, they’re going to keep doing what they do best. Have a load of talent, manage to misuse it, pass the ball way too much, lose about a mile of field position due to penalties, lose a lot of games and then leave town. The San Diego Chargers have a new coach. His name is Kevin Gilbride. It doesn’t matter though. This team’s future is so dark and dreary, they. need night-vision goggles. The Chargers are really paying now for their Super Bowl appearance three years ago. And they look to be paying for quite a while. That Super Bowl will be a distant memory by the time they get back to .500 ever again. Look for this team to contend for the number one pick in next year’s draft.

SPORTS

Terminal Stupiclity Leave

Tradition

Alone

Not content with the way they have tampered with some ofMajor League Baseball’s most hallowed traditions, the people who control it have now set their sites on perhaps the most cherished traditions of all: the American and National Leagues. Baseball owners are currently considering the realignment scheme listed on this page, Take a look. In other words, say goodbye to the American and National Leagues as we know them. All that would be left are an overglorified Eastern and Western Conference in a realignment scheme that focuses way too much on geographical considerations. This isn’t baseball. Realignment is going to happen. But why like this? Why can’t the sanctity of the American and National League system be preserved? This proposal is stupid for many reasons, including, but not limited to, the I following. Too many teams would have to switch leagues. This, hopefully, is the stumbling point that will bring this idea to a screeching halt. Any team that would have to switch leagues has veto power. What this means is that only ONE of Montreal, New York Mets, Philadelphia, Atlanta, Cincinnati, Florida, Pittsburgh, Chicago White Sox, Kansas City, Milwaukee, Minnesota, Texas, Anaheim, Oakland or Seattle has to say no to kill the proposal. Just one. There’s got to be at least one; smart owner in there scjmewhere, if such a thing exists. What would happen to the DH? Simple, the Players’ Union, perhaps one step lower than your typical Mafia on the power scale, would push for a Dr-1 in both leagues, due to so many teams switching leagues. Of COLLJS~, they would get what they wanted. Well, there goes that subtle little difference. Teams would readjust to the different style of play if they changed leagues. There are differences. American League pitchers pitch differently than their National League counterparts. There is more strategy involved in a National League game. Eventually all the subtle differences will blend together and both leagues will be carbon copies of each other, Yay. Fun.

I realize that baseball needs help. But why must that help come in the form of constant assaults on the sacred traditions that make the game what it is? One of these days, there will be no traditions left, and the owners and players will find themselves with nowhere else to look for changes except for themselves and their own actions. Why not just do that now, and save all of us the pain and frustration.

Jerry

“mite

Flag” Reinsdorf

Jerry Reinsdorf, Chairman of the Board of the NBA’s Chicago Bulls and Major League Baseball’s Chicago White Sox, has managed to do something incredibly stupid in baseball for the second time this year. Everybody remembers before the season began when he very openly opposed a new 1abour agreement with the Players’ Union because he wanted an agreement that would better control escalating player salaries. Then he turned around and signed Albert Belle to an $11 million dollar a year contract, the richest at the time, This prompted the owners to change their minds about the agreement, and decided to ratify it after they had rejected it a week earlier. Now Reinsdorf has brought his act upon his own team, which are already probably the biggest circus act in baseball right now. With his team only three and a half games out of first place in their division, Reinsdorf put up the white flag and traded away starting pitchers Wilson Alvarez and Danny Darwin, who were key members of their rotation, and closer Roberto Hernandez, who was near the top of the league in saves, to the San Francisco Giants for six minor league players, only one of whom carries any significance. Reinsdorf then dug a deeper hole for himself by saying that he made the trade because there was no way that the team would do anything in the playoffs; they might as well get something for their freeagents-to-be. Players and fans reacted with the expected bitterness and Reinsdorfcame out looking like an even bigger idiot than he did earlier in the year. All I can say is, as the man who nearly broke up the NBA World Champion Chicago Bulls, it seems to suit him just fine.

The American

Media

are Idiots

Remember when Donovan Bailey won the gold in the 1UOm with a world record time? Remember the famous Michael Johnson 200400 double gold medal performance with the world record time in the ZOOm? Remember when the American media decided that Michael Johnson was the Wor!d’s Fastest Man, a title usually reserved for the top 1OOm runner in the world, because of his “superior” performance? Remember that idiot Bob Costas from NBC saying that if you multiplied Bailey’s time by two that Johnson’s 200m time was faster, totally ignoring that Bailey’s combined 20Om time included two starts, to Johnson’s one?

I I I I I I I

Baltimore Orioles Boston Red Sax

I I

I I’ I I

Well, American stupidity has struck once again. At the World Track and Field Championships last month in Athens, Maurice Green of the I_Jnited States dcfeated Bailey in the 100~1 to take the gold medal. Well guess who the World’s Fastest Man is now? That’s right, the criteria has magically reverted back to the trdditional “1UOm champion” paradigm now that an American has won it again, and apparently Green is the World’s Fastest Man. This was actually said after the race by an American announcer. Maybe World Wrestling Federation World Champion Bret Hart said it best when he said, “You ever notice that America is shaped like one big toilet bowl? That’s because Americans are full of CRAP!”

i I

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1 I I I I

by Jeff Peeters

Major League Baseball’s proposed realignment

1 I

I I I I

Friday, August 29, 1997

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I want to live in a baseball You know, sometimes, I wish the real world was like baseball. To quote a classic song, “What a wonderful world this would be.” Look at the whoIe Tony Phillips debacle. He gets arrested by the police on charges of drug possession, based predominantly on the fact that he had cocaine with him when he was detained. His team, the Anaheim Angels, try to suspend him so he can undertake rehabilitation. Sounds reasonable right? Haha, stupid, you’re not thinking like a baseball person. Tony Phillips went to the almighty player’s union, which protested the suspension to the league. In a move of pure confu-

sion, the owners committee sided with Phillips. Now, we can beIieve that they were just trying to curry favour with the union, in preparation for the next labour war, I mean, negotiation. Or we can believe the owners are out of their fucking minds. I’ve been thinking that for a few years now. End of story is, Tony Phillips has been charged, not suspended, and the owner’s ranks are a little less united than before. Jerry Reinsdorf, chairman of the Chicago White Sox convinces baseball’s owners that they cannot survive if salaries continue to

escalate. The players go on strike, the World Series is cancelled, baseball suffers immeasurable damage. How does Reinsdorf repair the damage he helped cause? He signs Albert Belle to a five year $55 million contract, loses his best pitcher (Alex Fernandez) as he cannot afford to pay the guy, then trades away his best starter (Wilson Alverez), ace reliever (Roberto Hernandez), team legend (Harold Baines) and finest living fossi (Danny Darwin). Does anyone complain? Does anyone look back to when Oakland A’s owner Charley Finley tried to se11 off his best players in straight cash deals, and

commissioner Bowie Kuhn said “ no” ? Guess. Look at the Wil Corder0 situation. He’s accused of beating his wife, after the police find his wife bloodied, with the imprint of a phone receiveron &e&4! The Boston Red Sox want to suspend Corder0 and make him get counselling. The union intervenes, Boston can’t deal him away, so they’re stuck with WiI, which isn’t tbo bad apparently, because he hits the ball as well as he hits his wife, Wil and his lovely, and might I mention, ba#te?& wife go on ESPN, at which point they cheer-

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fully deny that he has ever abused her. He laughs. She smiles. Their claims contradict police reports. They contradict the statements made by Cordero’s wife at the time of arrest. They contradict the statements of Cordero’s first wife, who cIaims he abused her too. They contradicts the facts known by Boston GM Dan Duquette, who knew Corder0 when both were in Montreal. End of story is, Corder0 is still playing and he rejected a deal that would have seen him plead guilty and serve no jail time. 1 personally hope he fries, but the union would probably just appeal that anyway. Take baseball resident bad boy Albert Belle. Tty to ignore the numerous incidents where he’s thrown objects at fans, berated a very taiented reporter in the 1995 World Series because she was a woman, acted beligcrently towards the fans and the media. Try it. It can’t be too hard. The powers that be in basebalI can! At the most recent All-star game in Cleveland, Albert (or Joey, as he was known in his alcoholic days) went to the game and told manager Joe Torre he was going to have no part in the festivities, would not participate in the workout, or play in the game. AI1 he was going to do was get booed once by the Cleveland fans he deserted, collect his money and run. I’11 bet Tiger’s first baseman Tony Clark, a great young player who deserved to make the team was really, really, K&$ impressed. Marge Schott, with her racist, offensive and outright embarrasing beliefs still owns the Cincinnati Reds. Steve Howe. Now, don’t let me give you the impression that justice is never served in baseball. Pete Rose is still suspended for life after being accused of betting on baseball games. He hasn’t appealed, but I assume that’s because he’s trying to hang out with a better crowd. You still get suspended for starting a bench clearing brawl, proving conclusively that it’s a worse crime to punch a man than to try and make a direct call to your wife’s brain. Look at the case of Los Angeles Dodgers second baseman Wilton Guerrero. Earlier in the season, he broke a bat, and littIe bits of cork flew all over the field. In baseball, that’s cheating, and Wilton received the baseball equivalent of the death sentence: an eight game suspension. As Jay Leno quipped recently, “You can’t stick stuff in your bat, that’s wrong. But you can stick stuff in your nose, no problem.” I kind of wish I’d &me up with that one.

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impressive record and quickly establishing himself as one of the top wrestlers in the AWWF. re you a wrestling fan? If Jeffries is a former AWWF you just nodded enthusiWorld Heavyweight Champion astically, I’ll assume as well as a two-time AWWF Xyou’ve heard of the WWF. Hell, Treme Golden Champion. you may even have heard of the Jeffries’ no-nonsense, take no WCW. Have you heard of the prisoners style along with his “I AWWF? I didn’t think so. don’t give a damn” attitude have The AWWF is an up-andleft many an opponent on the coming federation run by Presishort end of the win-loss column. denr Kip Scarscone. It now boasts Jeffries is a loner, and has a roster of 34 wrestlers, some origineverwantedanybody’s help. But nal, but many knockoffs of other, when the Hart Foundation started moreescablished wrestlers. It concreating chaos in the AWWF tains two stables, the Triple ranks, led by two-time AWWF Threat and the Hart Foundation, World Heavyweight Champion with a number of singles wresBret Hart, something needed to tlers in between. be done. Two wrestlers actually hail Enter “The Franchise” from Kitchener Waterloo and the Shane Douglas. Douglas knew Imprint offices. The “Master of that Jeffrics was a force to be reckSubmission” Wayne Jeffries, who oned with in the squared circle, may be remembered for his and proceeded to do the unthinkslightly slanted Arts reviews, and able. Douglas united himselfwith Damage, who wishes to remain Jeffries and John Fucsko, who anonymous, are two of the prepreviously had been the bitterest mier wrestlers in the AWWF. of enemies, and formed the TriDamage was the seventh ple Threat, which quickly became wrestler to join the AWWF. He a dominant force in the AWWF. quickly went on a tear and beJeffries explains, “The thing with the Triple Threat is that we came the first titleholder within the Federation before a small don’t really like each other all shakeup in the ranks occurred, that much. But we realize that we’re the three best damn pieces leaving all previous titles null and void. He then joined the Hart of talent in this here Federation. Foundation as one of its founding We realized that we could have some legendary ass-whipping sesmembers within the AWWF. sions and that the other pieces of After taking a one month hiatrash in the federation were slowtus, he returned and renounced ing us down. We joined up so that his membership in the HF. He announced that he was out to we can beat the living hell out of the other pieces oftrash until their remodel the AWWF in his imlifeless carcasses are stuffed and age, without all the “Scum-sucksittin’ in my living room, and then ing Damage wannabes all over when we’re done that, we’ll have the place.” With that bold stateWorld Wars Three, Four and Five. ment he proceeded to take the “But right now, our main foExtreme Golden Championship cus is on those pink-and-black away from Hitman at the last tight wearing, panty-waisted sisWrestlemania. sies in the Hart Foundation. “My job is to make sure that We’re gonna whip their asses all none of these so called ‘superthe way back co Calgary so they stars’ gets away with pretending to be badder than me,” he says. “I can ride their little ponies and milk their little cows. And there don’t have respect for none of the ain’t nothing nobody can do about panty-wearin’ sissies in the it cause I’m Wayne. Jeffries with AWWF.” Right now Damage is the Triple Threat and they’re embroiled in an ugly war of words with the Hart Foundation. He not.” And what about Damage? cites his Hart-hating reasons as “I don’t give a damn about this: “I thought I had left the Damage. Sure, he can wrestle, AWWF in good hands when I and he whipped some Hart Fountook off. But that bunch of whiny dation ass just like I did, so he know nothin’s nearly destroyed ain’t all that bad in my book. But theFederation while I wasn’t here. the bottom line is that he’s a piece I’m gonna take them down one of trash like all the rest of them by one, and then turn my attenand when I get him inside the tion to the rest of the dungheap square circle, I’m gonna bring him that is the AWWF roster. Noone’s a big 01’ can of whoopass and safe.” How does he feel about his serve it to him right there in front former Imprint consort, Wayne of the whole world. It ain’t perJeffries? “I respect noone. Wayne sonal, that’s just the kinda guy Jeffries comes close, but eventuthat I am.” ally he’ll go down just like everyDamage and Jeffries look to 1 one else has.” h be forces to be reckoned with in “The Master of Submisthe AWWF. To keep tabson their sion” Wayne Jeffi-ies entered progress in the AWWF, you can the Federation after Damage inI troduced him to it. Jeffries quickly visit the AWWF web page at 1 www.angelfire.com/azlawwf/. made an impact, running up an ___ .

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