1997-98_v20,n11_Imprint by Editor Imprint

-- GO BEYONDIHt tl IGE II

---

into the FRIDAYFURYOF THE~(d?~~CI)#~

Still Absolufely Kitchener, Waterloo,

the

BIGGEST Cambridge

PARTY in All & Guelph

Student Admission Bus @ the PA.& at 10:45,ll=QOs 12:30 811sReturns to Campus @ 145 & 2:10

Off-Campus Taxi Rides to THE LYRIC We-Awav - Prizes & Concert - - - - Tickets ------ --

FREI !!!

DJ’s Mark Oliver (Joker, Better Days) & Yonexx (The Underground, Industry)

s RETROAT THE METRO 8 DJ Mark Masters (Joker) Featuring Top 20 Alternative Rock

Metropolis will be giving away U2 tickets every Friday this September. All entrants will qualify to win a Kokanee Hot Tub from Labatt’s. s

The art of rhetoric

Campus crews

Speech from the Throne promises much for students by Robert Schmidt special to Imprint

he re-elected Federal Liberal Government put forward much optimism for their new Parliamentary session on Tuesday. This, the 32nd Parliamerit, is cxpccced to be one of the most active and interesting for political watchers. For the first time ever, five official parties are sitting, with the Liberals holding a slim three seat majority. The Speech from the Throne stated much that was expected and demonstrated the government’s place at Canada’s centre. The government predicts a balanced budget by 1999 and the commitment of money to working down the debt. The government also promised to work toward increased funding of services. The government promised new initiatives in the realm of education, including the estabtishment of several Centres of Excellence. According to the Speech from the Throne, the Centres will deepen our understanding of children’s development and improve our ability to respond to children’s needs. The government also promises to take an active role in the employment of young Canadians. The Speech

states that “the level of unemployment among Canadians between the ages of 18 and 25 is unacceptably high.” The Speech also promised to support students interested in continuing their education as well as to support young Canadians having difficulty getting started in the workplace Young Canadians will have greater access to postsecondary education, says the government, promising changes to the Canada Student: Loans Program as well as the creation of new scholarships to promote excellence in students and to help low to moderate income Canadians. The government also intends to increase funding for student summer placements and start a mentorship program with the provinces and private sector. The Canadian Alliance 9f Student Associations (CASA) was pleased with the government’s acknowledgement of issues important to students, but urged caution. Hoops Harrison, National Director of CASA said, “While the government seems to be heading in the right direction, it still has not identified essential elements of any serious attempt to solve the problem.” CASA had hoped for more upfront funding or income based rebates. Within this mandate the government vows “to make Canada a better place: a stronger country with a brighter future and greater opportunities for its young DeoPle,” La1

UW packs ‘em in by Katie Imprint

Ricks staff

or the Fall 1997 term, IJW has accepted approximately 300 more students than the 3,700 anticipated. In already overcrowded classrooms, some students have found themselves unable to register for the classes they want and, increasingly, the classes ehey need to graduate. The 105 per: cent increase over the targeted enrolment also means a beneficial increase in revenue from tuition, but there may be disadvantages to individual students and to the faculty who try to accommodate them. Specific reasons for the high enrolment are yet. to be determined. According to Undergraduate Admissions officer Peter Burroughs, a new bursar)i program resulted in 1,200 first-year students accepting an offer from UW along

Physics 111 students tough it out in the name of knowledge. photo

by Ali Smith

with a $1000 bursary; only 1,000 students were expected to accept the bursary offer. Burroughs says that the targeted enro 11ment has been the same “for the past two to three years,” with last year’s results falling slightly below target. “We anticipate the target will be the same for 1998,” Burioughs commented, explaining that class limits are “bumped” to accommodate any extra students. Responding to concerns that students cannot get the courses they need in the terms that they need them, Burroughs stated that students may have to wait until future terms to get some of their ‘&preferred electives” but did not feel that the influx of new students represented any threat to students trying to get the credits they need to graduate. However, Department of English professor Randy Harris found it necessary this term to break a one section course into two sections to allow “approximately 12 students” to sign-in to the course, which some of them required to graduate. For several students, waiting another term to take the course might have meant spending an extra term in school. Harris’ solution to the problem means about “60 per cent more work than average” for himself, and he stresses that it isn’t a final answer to “There are more people than there are overcrowding, said Harris, recommending that the university spaces,” either hire more faculty or employ a more discriminating screening process so that there “aren’t as many people clamouring for the same class.” LJltimacely, the Department that admits the students “should be responsible,” pointed .out Harris. “If [the Department] can’t look after them, [the students] shouldn’t be admitted.” Catherine Schreyer is another English professor who has used an ad hocsolucion for courses that are too full. She divides some of her classes, particularly those requiring student presentations, into two sections and meets with each section for two hours a week. “There’s just not enough room and not enough time,” classes work for certain kinds of Schreyer said. “Large fields, but we’ve got to have smaller classes because someone has to listen and respond.”

photo by Rob Van Kruistum

ponscruction this Monday, and .*. . on Ring ..- Road* began ** X4 ~111 contmue unrll October Il. The first phase of construction involves repaving th#m road between South Campus Hall and Carl Polfock Hall The secoiid phase, expected to commence in early Ocrober, wiI1 see the repaving of Ring Road between the PAS and Minota Hagey Residence. Temporary stops have been erected to allow srudents to catch the bus as usual throughout the construction.

In Print 0 ‘ij L: Q

On the cover: “Mother. **Father” by UW*Fine Arts studenl Nicole Brazas, currently on display outside E;tst Campus Hall.

News - page 3 Crowded classrooms, 4th Annual Career Fair

Forum - page 8 Bomber bombs out; check out our new additions

Human -page 3ne wom&‘s

experience with the Date Rape Drum

Science and Technology, page t 1 Is space exploration

worth the money?

sports -page

18 Warriors beaten by the underdogs Arts-page24 Ashley and Ethan together at last

NEWS

IMPRINT,

Friday, September 26, 1997

Engineers (re)unite! Facultv’s first graduates return to the old sod -for memories and mingling rl

by Jessica Kwik special to Imprint he UW Engineering alumni of 1962 and 1967 T reunited last weekend at the Student Life Centre to celebrxo their memories as two of the I niversity’s first graduating classes. Frank Anrep, the frrst graduate c;: the engineering faculty of Warxrloo, was among the class of ‘62 numbers present at the President’s rcceptionon Saturday. UW Pres.Jent James Downey remini::: Ibli with the crowd of about 10 11 a speech looking back to tht nostalgic time” of 30 and 35 ye ; past. ~-h. Downey’s speech refk :d upon the historical events th this cohort shared, such as thx. 4 iversity’s first convocation ceremony (held. at Seagram Stadiu nn in 1962), and Canada’s centennial in 1967. “1967 was also the last iear the Maple Leafs won the Sta lley Cup,” Downey bantered. The president expressed pride in the group’s legacy noting that, “in large part, the reputation of a university depends on the achievements of its alumni.” After the speech, alumni jubilantly reacquainted themselves with eachother. The engineering graduates spent a day together, beginning with lunch at the University Club and followed by a walking tour around the campus and the President’s reception.

Another board, next to the replacement Engineering rings being sold, revealed some memories alumni had written on slips of paper, entitled “I remember... ” Some wrote about the mud from the ongoing construction, the teamwork and the old computers. “Attempting engineering drafting in the portables (chicken coops) that were not air conditioned. This in the middle of the summer with temperatures approaching 100°F. Yes, we were marked on neatness,” wrote Ron Gotts, of the Chemical Engineering class of ‘62. W’s first ever engineering graduates Roger Beaulieu, looked over UW’s history, following the holding a glass of changes over the years. photo by Jessica Kwik wine, sighed “Oh how we age. . . I was The evening concluded with a on the walking tour and I was dinner and dance at the Four amazed by all the’ computer terPoints Hotel in Kitchener. minals, which are just wonderful. Photographs displaying the As-a student we used these IBM history of UW from the sixties to 1621s that used cards for every the present were mounted on line of computer programming. boards. People drifted past them, The cards had to be in order, and taking in the thirty years of if you dropped your pile of cards change. it would be a real disaster.” He

* with this cowon

appreciated the smaller class sizes of old (30 people), but he liked the Student Life Centre of today. “When I was here, we had three buildings and only one common room in the whole school.” The reunion of this group represents a break in tradition, as homecomings for the engineering faculty are usually held in

Career fair hits Kitchener

by Tasmina Imprint

(excludesextra cheese and double toppings)

11 465 EXPIRES:PHILLIP Oct. 31/97

STm WATERLOO

,~~ff&jjjj

746-6893:

hh*i

GreatTaste! Great Price! Gmat Pizza!” ZIrrr”Ir~IrrIrrrrrrr~m~r~~rrrrDID-r-1

setting up booths. Partnerships for Employment provides an opportunity for graduating students to meet with a large variety of prospective employers in addition to giving employers the chance to meet potential recruits and present the benefits of their respective companies. Students who are not yet in their last year can take advantage of the fair to learn more about the areas that interest them and the classes they may need for a career in those areas. Career information forums, a new feature this year, will provide both the companies and students with an opportunity to understand each others’ requirements and expectations. Guide books detailing the event are available from the Career Resource Centres of each school and will also be available during the fair.

Feds run Sci Sot elections

onlv *

ADD A SECOND LARGE FOR ONLY $7.99 (PLUSTAX)

Pate1 staff

he annual universitylcollege fair, entitled “Partnerships for Employment,” will be held on Wednesday, October 1, 1997 at Bingeman’s Conference Centre in Kitchener. The fair is being co-sponsored by the University of Waterloo, Wilfred Laurier University, University of Guelph and Conestoga College. UW students will be able to catch buses to Bingeman’s from the Student Life Centre. With over 180 companies from across Canada and the USA represented, the fair is expected to be the biggest post-secondary career fair in Ontario thus far. Companies in a range of areas, including finance, computers, retail and law enforcement will be

This past June, the 25th and 20th anniversary groups came together, while Saturday’s reunion honoured the 30th and 35th anniversary group. “1 think we will continue this though, having the younger group come in June, and the “golden oldies” in September,” one organizer said.

Jobs! Jobs! Jobs’

by Tasmina IAprint

June.

Pate1 staff

lections for the Science Society are being run by the Federation of Students this term. Ideally, elections should be held by the existing Sci Sot council. In this case, however, there does not appear to be one. The previous elections, held during the Winter ‘97 term, were deemed invalid and council members from the previous term were to continue in their positions until a by-election was held this September. However, council members did not take up their positions at the start of this term, and the Sci Sot offices remained closed. Students from the Biology

[Jndergraduate club approached the Feds and asked them to take control of the elections and other responsibilities until a new council was in. The Chemistry, Earth Sciences and Physics clubs supported the decision. As the Feds were already collecting the Sci Sot fees and certain time sensitive issues needed to be addressed immediately, the clubs felt it was reasonable to allow them to take over. Last term’s elections were deemed invalid due to the less than 10 per cent voter turnout. Further, the Sci-Sot board of directors was unable to ratify the results. The new elections for president, vice-president, vice-president coop and secretary/treasurer will be held October 2.

IMPRINT,

Friday,

September

NEWS

26, 1997

UW True Crime r

waterluo

Regional

l-800-265-2222 compiled

by Bruce Lee-Shanok special to Imprint

Theft of UW property On September 15, a Sony Remote Commander was stolen from the Engineering Lecture Hall. Several items were stolen from B.C. Matrhews Hall on September 18, including a Pentium-ZOO computer, a Panasonic Camcorder, a Logitech Digital Computer Video Recorder, and a CPU vault.

Theft

of non-UW

property

Muskoka Lawn Chairs were stolen from Wilfrid Laurier University on September 10. The chairs were later found by a [Jniversity of Waterloo student and promptly returned.

Theft

of personal

property

On September 9, a baby stroller was stolen outside 102 Seagram Drive, On September 10, binoculars and several CDs were stolen from a vehicle parked on campus. A car license plate (MF 815) was stolen from St. Jerome’s College on September 12. , On September 17 and 18, a number of lockers containing sports equipment were broken into in the Married Students Apart-

ments. A textbook was also stolen from the Married Students Apartment on the September 18. Finally, a briefcase was stolen from the Davis Centre on September 18. The item was later recovered by an officer. The suspect has not been caught.

damaged, one in rhe the B4 parking lot. On September excitable individuals the F lot, wrapped it it ablaze.

Provincial Bicycle

theft

Two bikes were stolen from ;hc Ron Eydt Village on September 8 and 9. On September 10, more bikes were stolen from the University Club, Village One and outside 104 Seagram Drive. The Davis Centre had a bike stolen on September 14. The theft of bikes is a frequent occurence in and around the university campus. Sergeant Wayne Shortt of the UW Police recommends that students use a Kryptonite (or similar) lock to lock their bikes, and not cables. Further, he adds that bikes should be attached to something solid, like a bike rack. Merely locking the wheels to the frame is not sufficient.

Mischief A lamp post was knocked over on the Health and Safety walkway on September 4. On September 13, two vehicles were

S lot and the one in 20, some particularly came upon a car in in toilet paper and set

Offenses

On September 4,13, and 18, the evervigilant Bombshelter staff dctectcd incidents of altered ID. In all cases, the ID was seized and police were contacted. The offending individuals have been charged. On September 4, two UW students were apprehended for possession of a Wilfrid Laurier University sign at the Turnkey desk. Alcohol was involved. The same day, a verbal confrontation between a former student and the Columbia Icefields staff resulted in police being called and the student being asked to leave campus property. Three individuals were charged with possession of stolen property in the University Plaza area on September 9. Due to the location of the alcohol-related incident, Waterloo Regional Police Services were involved.

Other

incidents

On September 11, a vehicle lost control ac the corner of the PAC service road

and Ring Road, causing property damage. A Walksafe team witnessed that the vehicle failed to remain at the scene and saw the vehicle enter parking lot M. University Police responded and the individual responsi ble was charged. On September 13, a “very intoxicated” Wilfrid Laurier student was on Ring Road outside Carl Pollock Hall. The subject was picked up by police and turned over to his mother for further action. On September 14and 20, a total offour individuals were found in possession of narcotics. The individuals were promptly dealt with by University Police. A counterfeit $20 bill was detected at the coffee shop in South Campus Hall. The incident is under investigation. Two noise complaints at 106 Seagram were resolved by police. Sergeant Shortt noted that there has been a marked increase in obscene or harassing phone calls in the area. Anyone receiving such a call should make a log of the phone call, including detailed information regarding the time and nature of the call, as well as any discernable traits of the caller. Call log sheets, as well as other information, are available at the UW Police web site at www.adm.uwaterIoo,ca/infopol/ index,html.

help wanted:

bacl~~~wa~t~ass glimpse of what it’s to work at IBM? Join us at our career fair on October 4. for a like

A r:orrq~ny’s a lot like a great hand. When you Mratch a concert, what you see is just the product of the hard work. It’s p&agcd and positioned and polished for public c:onsum@n. What you don’t set: is the sweat arld the planning that go into the performance.

Date: Saturday, October 4 Time: 13) pm. Location: IHM Carlada Ltd.

36Oc) At IBM, we need more virtuosos for our band. And weil like to show you what goes on behind the scenes to convince you. On Saturday, October 41,~$11 be holding a career fair where you can meet the people youil work with, talk about the kind of projects you’d work on and get a first-person look at the kind of energy, inventiveness and breakthrough thinking that make LHM a great place to orchestrate your career. Feel the hunger our eople have to do exciting, nobody’s-ever-done-thatyourself It efore stuff. Spend a little time imqini with a company that values and rewards T rilliance. As IBM Canada grows, we have scores of great career opportunities in all areas of the company.

IBM

is a registered

trade-mark

!Solut.km

for a amalI

planetia a tirade-mark

For those unable to attend please forward r&m&. ‘Co submit it on-&e: Visit: www.can.ib~,rr~o~~~

Stef:lf:s

Or, submit your r&l& and most recent transcripts through your school’s career (nentrc.

blast

Avtmuc

a cburrf*nt

Markham, Ontario (On-site p-king umihhk) In computer science, engimrring or commerce? Really want to stretch both sides of your brain? Stop by our career fair. J&&e got the ticket.

Time: 11:45 a.m. Locath: University of Waterloo Student Life Centre

Phone: E-mail:

d International

l-800-IBM-4YOU (426-4968) ibmhr@ca.ibmmail.com

Business

Mmhim

Corpora~n

Ext. 91 A

wed

under liwnce

by IBM Canada Ltd.

I!997 IBM Corp.

Solutions

for a small planet:

NEWS

IMPRINT,

compiled by Owen Gregory special to Imprint

New chair The University of Waterloo has created a new industrial research chair focusing on sensor technology. The position has been given to Arokia Nathan of the electrical and computer engineering department, who comes to the chair with 10 years of research experience in the design and fabrication of silicon sensors. Nathan and his students wilt focus on the amorphous silicon thin film technology developed at UW’s microelectronic chip fabrication facility.

Learning

must be some avoid doing the thing for the forty years.

What shape is your future

compiled by Bernhard and Sean Horvvich speciril to Imprint

On Wednesday October 8, 1997 at 6pm, Tom Healy, Managing Partner Products Canada, will be speaking to the University of Waterloo on “Andersen Consultancy

Consulting: Company.”

all the best

things

about

co-op,

stuffed

At Andersen, we deliver Complete Business Solutions. To do this, we need a Complete Spectrum of People: “People-people”, “Process-people” and “Technology-people”. And most importantly,

into

26, 1997

bour force. The report also revealed that in 1991,42 per cent of university graduates in the region were from the UW or WL U.

Drinking

and riding

Driving his horse-drawn buggy down concession 4-5 of Mornington township, Ronald Kuepfer ran a stop sign. Mr. Kuepfer was allegedly asleep in the buggy. An oncoming van collided with the horse-drawn buggy. The passengerofthe van received minor injuries, but the driver of the van, Mr. Kuepfer and the horse were all uninjured. Mr. Kuepfer is being charged with careless driving and having open Iiquor in the vehicle.

Whoa,

The Russian military have lost over 100 small nuclear bombs according to a statement given by Alexander Lebed, former security adviser to President Boris Yeltsin. The statement was made during an interview with the LJ.S. television news program 60 M~zzrtes earlier this month. It was confirmed on Monday, September 22 by former environmental safety adviser Alexei Yablokov in a letter to the Novnyu Gazers. Each bomb is the size of a suitcase and carries enough explosive power to kill lOO,c)OO people.

cowboy

The passenger of a car driving down Dando Avenue in Cambridge used a rope to lasso a pedestrian on the sidewalk. The snared youth, who was dragged Gve meters behind the car, suffered scrapes and rope burns as a result of the ordeal. All three youths are believed to be Gait Collegiate students.

Canada

Wall

Russia

in?

September

and leaving

Despite being home to two universities, the region of Waterloo has a workforce in which only 11.53 per cent of workers have university degrees. The provincial average is 12.80 per cent, The figures arc from a report completed by UW economics professor Larry Smith. Smith warns that the region could lose industry if it does not increase its skilled la-

There way to same next

Friday,

Prime MinisterJean Chretien appointed four new members to the Senate on Tuesday. Ferdinand Robichaud of New Brunswick, Catherine Callbeck of P.E.I., Sister Mary Alice Butts of Nova Scotia and Marisa Ferratti Barth of Quebec were appointed to fill several g;lps in the Senate, One Quebec seat remains unfilled. Both Reform leader Preston Manning and PC leader Jean Charest were critical of the appointments, seeing them as an attempt to rebuild the Liberal power base in the Senate. Butts is notable as the first nun ever to serve in the House of Commons or the Senate.

“Team-player-people.”

England If you think

you fit this description,

COME

ON OUT!

Wednesday, Reception

October 8,1997 at 6pm Davis Centre 1302 to follow in Davis Centre 1301 Dress is casual

ANDERSEN

CONSULTING

Algiers

Two English nurses, Deborah Barry and Lucille McLauchlan, have been found guilty for the murder of a colleague in El Khobar, Saudi AraThe victim was found bia. stabbed, bludgeoned and suffocated in her room. Barry was sentenced to death by beheading,

Witnesses reported that approximately 200 people were killed in a massacre in Baraki, a suburb of Algiers, on the night of Tuesday, September 23. Official estimates put the number at 85 dead and 44 wounded. According to the witnesses, armed men threw bombs and fired

while

bullets

McLauchlan

(an accessory)

was sentenced to eight years in prison and 500 lashes. The British government has demanded clemency for the two women, claiming that their sentences were too severe and that corporal punishment is inhumane.

into

houses,

ordering

the

inhabitants to come out. Residents who tried to escape were either shot to death or had their throats slashed. Muslim fundamentalist rebels are believed to be responsible for the massacre.

IMPRINT,

NEWS

Friday, September 26, 1997

Campus Question: by Cindy Hackelberg, Jonathan Evans and Rachel Beattie (photos)

7--

What kind of beer would you.like to see on tap at the Bomber?

“Moosehead.”

“Smithwicks - ‘cause it’s good.”

“Heiniken. It’s good; it’s from Europe.”

“Moosehead - it’s good beer.”

Veronique Hiriart 3A Biology

Nate Engler 3A ES

Martin Forss 4A Engineering

Greg Watters 3A Planning

“Definitely Keystone. It’s American beer.”

“Kokanee. It tastes great.”

“Moosehead - it’s awesome!”

“Guiness. Fuck that domestic shit.”

Steve Rueffer Psychology grad studies

Adam Pringle 1A Engineering

Christie Weigel t 1AES

Chuck 4A ES

Esso

Imperial Oil

apply what you know.

’ learn what you don’t. We’re

Imperial

embracing

century,

Oil,

the

Testing.

When

you think

been doing Imperial

and

about

that

moving

Exploring.

Oil,

you’ll

so will

if you’re

graduating

is challenging with

Asking

find

that

we’re

the traditional,

confidence questions.

it, it’s not all that different

for the last few years.

day& And

Commerce, . discipline,

a company

new,

if you

take

still

learning

into

the

Finding from

what

the time

ZIst

answers. you’ve

to explore

new things

every

you.

Business we’d really

from

an Engineering,

Administration,

Earth

like to meet with

you.

Computer

Science,

or related

visit us at Bingemans Conference Centre career fair Wednesday, OctoberI; 1997 For more information about graduate and summer/co-op at Imperial Oil, visit our web site at:

www.imperial~il.ca/impetial/campusl.htm

opportunities

the iutomotive, Energy, Pipe and Tube, Appliance, Container, and Steel Distribution Industries. AS a market-driven company,

we’re committed for long-t&m

to exciting strategies

economic

For inore information

growthabout Dofasco,

technologies and the recruitment of exceptional gmduates who can shanz our vision for the future. We’re offering permanent positions to 1998 graduates in a vtiety of disciplines, as well as summer employment to students in their final summer before graduation. Well be interviewing on your campus soon. Check Gth your Career Placement Offices for more details. visit our website: www.dofasco.ca

Weasel

hwkting made easy

by Peter Lenardon

- Editor-in-Chief

SLC should be for students, not vendors

The forum pages allow members of the University of Waterloo community to present their views on various through letters to the editor and longer comment pieces. The opinions expressed in columns, comment pieces, and other articles are strictly those of the authors, not of Imprint.

issues letters

top me if you’ve heard this one before: commercial culture surrounds us and advertising is everywhere. In the last few years, the amount of commercial activity on campus has increased beyond anything in my memory. Some days, a walk through the Student Life Centre makes me feel like I’m in a third world country straight out of some bad adventure flick, trying find my way around in a makeshift market, accosted by deafening music and unwanted sales pitches. It often seems as though the beginning of term is just an excuse for vendors to gather iike vultures around the remains of your student loan. Now, 1’m not an enemy of free enterprise or even street vendors in general, but at some point it would be nice to see a space outside of our classrooms and libraries where students could relax without hawkers <round. It would also be nice if someone tried to sell so -nething other than trendy New Age crap. Some of it bDcders on insulting. For instance: 1. You know those ubiquitous big, bulky wool sweaters. Authentic, knitted by an old woman in South America. You pay $50, the old lady proi lsbiy got paid 50 cents. The same sort of booths are laden with those knit purple and green pants, like potato sacks with elastic waist bands and two perfunctory pockets. The old lady probably only got a quarter for those. 2. What’s with all the silver jewelry made to look like mystical Mayan/Celtic amulets? I’m only guessing, but I don’t think people in Peru wear this crap. Neither did the societies who built Macchu Pichu or Stonehenge. So what is the attraction? 3. The new trendy clothing lines with names like Radwear or Psychogear or Shredthreads are neverending. Essentially, they’re clothes for people who make a statement by looking like clowns. “But, I saw something like it in Spin. Please like me, I’m wearing the newest Dudeduds.” Somebody’s god help us, it’s Chip and Pepper all over again. ‘The list goeson: futons, candles, Mennonite quilts, locally-made crafts. (Crafts? Fuck crafts.) I’m pretty sure I don’t need to acquire a quilted Holly Hobby portrait in a wood frame, any duck-shaped candle ,holders, or those darling heart-shaped coat hooks before I die. Christmas decorations (oh, just wait until Christmas), old books that could not be sold elsewhere, Visa, Mastercard, incense burners, aromatherapy oil, pen and pencil sets, stone-carved lighters, dream catchers, pseudo-vintage t-shirts, posters, figurines and other tacky glassware. Remember this: you are a target. Everyone is selling something, even the paper in your hands now. Imprint, although it is a student publication run by volunteers, is full of ads; they are the paper’s main source of revenue. It has been made pretty clear to me, given the proliferation of new publications on campus, that students (18-24 years old) are perceived to be a large, untapped market. All kinds of people want to sell you stuff. The job of the editor of any publication is to put something between the ads so the larger plan isn’t so obvious. The same goes for television and radio. So what do you do? Consumerism is both repugnant and attractive to most people. We know we don’t need most of the stuff we see but we buy it anyway. Avoiding this is a matter of understanding what you need and realizing when you are being fooled/sold something. Why are so many vendors allowed into the Student Life Centre? They pay for ic of course, My question is, cm’t students buy shitty clothes and jewelry anywhere else? The downstairs of the SLC is basically a mall nlrcarfy. Why do we need booths selling us stuff in the space that is left? Wouldn’t it be nice if a student could wake up in Village, go to class, study and come back to relax in the Great Hall lvithout having somebody try to talk them out of money they may need for the next tuition increase? Considering how much we pay to be here, can’t one space be ad-free?

The University of Waterloo Student Newspaper Friday, September 26,1997 - Volume 20, Number 11 Student Life Centre, Room 1116, University of Waterloo, Waterloo, Ontario, N2L Ph: 519-888-4048 - Fax: 519-884-7800 - e-mail: editor@imprint.uwaterloo.ca www: http://imprintuwaterloo.ca

Editorial Editor in Chief Assistant Editor Forum Editor News Editor News Assistant &s Editor Arts Assistant Sports Editor Sports Assistant Human Editor ‘Science Editor Photo Editor Photo Assistant WWW Page Editor WWW Page Assistant Systems Administrator Graphic Editor Proofreaders

Staff

Board Peter Lenardon Katie Ricks Emily Bruner Natalie Gillis Tasmina Pate1 Scott Preston Debbra McClintock Greg Picken Liz Monier-Williams Tracy Hunt Andrew Krywaniuk Rob Van Kruistum Laurie Bulchak Justin Kominar Graham Dunn Klaus Steden Craig Hickie Rachel E. Beattie Mark Besz Shyreen Hirani Evie Nimmo Bernhard Wall

Imprint is the official student newspaper of published by Imprint Publications, WaterIoo, Ontario Community Yewspaper Association Imprint is published e\rery Friday during Imprint reserves the right to screen, edit, addressed to Imprint, Student Life Centre,

3Gl

Business Manager Advertising/Production Advertising Assistant

Marea Willis Laurie Tigert-Dumas Jonathan Evans Adam Natran

Distribution vacant

Board

of Directors

President Vice-President Secretary Treasurer Director at Large Staff Liaison

Contribution

Rob Van Kruistum vacant Klaus Steden Jeff Peeters vacant Justin Kominar

List

‘I‘im Campbdl, Mae Cantus, Iaian Iluke, Da\irl Eby, KimborIc> Ellig, Hrendan Filby, JanisGoldio, Owen Grcgov,Cindy Hxkclbcrg, Scan Horwich, Nicls Jcnscn, ‘l’rjmmy Kiowycki, Jessica k;w-ik, 13rw.x I,cu-Shanok, John I,C)fransccl, Tony hlarrins, t,cah hlc@irc, Amber Ncuman, hlichael Ol1cy, Jeff I’cetcrs, Ryan I’yxtc. Kick Rudy, liobcrt Schmidt, Anun Singh, Ali Smith, Srcphanic Speller, Lat~rcn Craig Stcphcn, ITrank Yang, hlikc l’unkcr

the IJniversity ofQ%tcrloo. It is an editorially indcpendcnt nc~sp~yer a corporation without share capital. Imprint is ;I member of the (OCNA). F~11and urinter terms, and cc-cry second FriciaJ- d wing the spring CCT~TI. and refuse advertising. Imprint ISSN 0706-7380. Mai! shdd tx Room 1116, University of ivaterloo, Ontario, I’GL, 3(X

Imprint subject gender,

welcomes letters to the editor from students and all members of the community. Letters received via electronic mail must be verified to editing for brevity and clarity. The editor reserves the right to refuse to publish letters or articles which are judged to be libellous race, religion or sexual orientation. Opinions expressed are those of the individuals and not of Imprint.

Paper tiger am appalled over the lack of common sense applied by your Editor-in-Distress, Peter Lenardon, in his management of Imprint correspondence. In an age where environmentalism and fiscal restraint dictates that we should preserve our natural resources, Mr. Lenardon refuses to em brace the paperless society. I recently surfed onto Imprint’s website to catch up on the news back at dear old IJW. Noticing some changes to our beloved Imprint, I submitted a letter to the alleged editor of the paper, Peter Lenardon. My letter was something of merry needling of our new editor, who as you may notice, has acquired the new title of “Editorin-Chief’. I criticized h4r. Lenardon’s new title when Imprint’s web site made no mention of additional editors, an oversight which has since been corrected. So I submitted via e-mail a healthy diatribe of Mr. Lenardon’s new title: “. . .I feel that the new terminology is oh, so very impressive. It is with profound glee that I embrace Imprint for upgrading from a simple, lowly editor, to a new, spanking-sharp Editor-inChief. A mere editor is hardly sufficient to handle our beloved Imprint. HAIL, TO THE CHIEF! I would like tosee some regular “editors” appointed beneath the “chief’ pretty soon, or I will resort to calling Mr. Lcnardon ‘goof. . .” Now, as of Monday, September 22, not an Imprint press day, there are editors beneath Mr. Lenardon, and my letter is no longer valid. However, when Mr. Lenardon received my letter via e-mail September 19, he repIied: “h/l r. Wood, If you would iike this message printed as a letter to the editor, we need verification of authorship in the form of a signature. In any case, thanks for your comments.” My reply: “Please! Verification of authorship? Welcome to the 90’s! We’re shooting for a paperless e-mail should be more societythan acceptable. I have submitted letters to the editor (Imprint and others) via e-mail numerous times in the past, and they have gone to print. You have my eketronic consent, and I believe a case could be made for such consent being as acceptable as verbal consent by telephone, which is, of course, legally binding. Good luck on the (reasonably) new job! Sincerely,

Gregory Wood” hh. Lenardon’s response: ‘34 r. Wood, If you would like this message printed as a letter to tlie editor, we need verification of authorship in the form of a signature. In any case, thanks for your comments. Peter” Regardlegs of Mr. Lenardon’s impersonal nature, I try once more to be heard. I am in Ottawa at present, so for me, using a signature for such verification of authorship also means using PAPER to deliver my signature by Fdx or via conventional mail. Electronic mail has been widely adopted because it reduces or eliminates paper transactions. Imprint’s demand for a signature on paper to print “letters to the editor” not only is wasteful, but offensive and discriminatory in Canada’s electronic democracy of the ‘90’s. To refuse email correspondence is to nullify the voices ofImprint’s electronic readership. Welcome to Imprint and welcome to the ‘90’s Mr. Editorin-Chief. May your e-mail in-box overfIaw and your gluttonous taste for paper subside. Oh and sir, you should know that your editorials remain as intellectually satisfying as dry toast.

Hidden agendas from the fizzheads

nybody watking past the Alumni House towards the entrance of the university on Thursday afternoon would have seen two adults and a child handing out “free” pop to anyone who wanted one. These people were here last year at the same time in the same location doing the same thing. The solution to the mystery of who these people were was revealed only after a student took a “free” pop. A three inch by two inch piece of green or blue paper given to each lucky person read “This is a FREE GIFT courtesy of C.C.C. BUILDERS - a group serving University age persons [sic] through Cornerstone Community Church.” A reIigious group.? Apparently they were “Just doing a nice thing for the students.” Excuse me for Iaughing. The group of people found at an Ontario university today is far from needy. We represent a largely middle to upper-middle class group. Generally speaking

we don’t go thirsty, except at 1:30 a.m. at the bar when we’ve run out of money. Why don’t they buy us a couple of beers then? If the purpose of the gift wasn’t charity, better defined as doing a nice thing for somebody in need, why was this group here. -? The purpose was clear. It’s called “brand awareness” ifyou’re in marketing. The ‘Cqrnerstone Community Church’: - is apparently on a recruitment drive. I have no problem with this. Get a room at the school, put up some signs on campus and recruit those who are intersted. Be up front. Tell us why you are here. Don’t put up a number of signs that say “Free Pop” when the pop is not free at all. If this group was so altruistic, they wouldn’t have identified themselves unless somebody was curious. Then, I could truly believe that they were simply “doing a nice thing for the students.” Instead what we have is a religious group doing an undercover recruitment drive for their organization. Why is this allowed to go’on? Who gave this group permission to be on campus? “University age persons” are the most susceptable tocults. This is a fact. Why UW would allow these covert bible thumpers on campus is beyond me. Remember what Mom and Dad always used to say “Don’t take candy from strangers.” Maybe I’m a cynic, but I think it’s pretty strange to have these strangers from a strange religious group offering me pop. . .don’t you?

already mostly full bar. Even more frustrating though, was the Iack of people admitted despite the opening of both the patio and “Ground Zero” sections. It is my understanding that the Bomber rakes in money hand over fist and it is for this reason that I say why can they not improve the place? Why not arrange it so that you can purchase alcohol efficiently instead of milling around an undersized counter with at best 2 people working it? Of course it is all fine and dandy if you are so fortunate to possess a tabIe and chairs so the overtaxed waitresses can fight their way through the crowd and deliver your pitcher to a table that wobbles as much as Jello in an earthquake. And speaking of alcohol, why is it that the best Bomber can offer on draught is Rickards Red or Labatt 50? There are many fine beers available at bars throughout this town, particularly at the Fox, would it kill the managers to cater to a more discriminating beer drinker? For thoseofyou satisfied with the bar that you know and have come to love throughout your tenure here at UW, I don’t apologize. In fact, I would like to suggest to you that perhaps the reason the Bomber stays the way it is, is due to the continued patronage by people. Why change it if people still come and unload their money on us? Eventually Fed Hall might

with a signature. or discriminatory

All material is on the basis of

regain its status as a premiere on campus and succeed Bomber; aIthough it will need more than new carpeting couches.

bar the far and

- Rrefldun m&y 38 Biochm-my

It don’t add up

repulses me that public money is now being spent on training tax professionals. These graduates will help people and corporations pay less tax, which is used to pay for our underfunded universities. Based on Calvin CK Chio’s article on UW’s new Masters program in Taxation, I think the program should be scrapped for two reasons. High taxation is not counterproductive. Calvin writes, *‘in today’s economy, the high tax burden on individuals and corporations is counterproductive.” Taxes are needed toeducate, heal and protect people, while, among many other things, allowing them to drive smoothly and to throw ‘away’ their garbage. Decreasing our level of taxation only helps us individually, while leaving the not-so-rich and the public intercontinued

to page

The Parking Lot is Full by Pete Nesbitt and Pat Spacek http://www.execulink.com/-nesbltt/PLIF/index.htm

- David Eby, 2A RPW

The Bomber bombs out To fh? EiihT,

n September 10, 1997, I returned to my roots at this university; that’s right, I am referring to the Bombshelter. Unfortunately I was woefully disappointed by the incompetence of the managing staff. Year after year I return to the Bomber, indulging myself and frolicking in the good cheer provided by my friends but always hoping someday the powers that be will change their methods to ‘improve the place. What am I referring to, you say suspiciously? I arrived on Wednesday

at 500

only

to find

that no bars were open except the one used by the servers. One would think that in anticipation ofan unusually heavy night ahead the managers would have thought to have more staff on hand and opened more bars to cater to the

Being a big Ernest Hemingway write a bunch of brilliant books nately, he had no writing talent.

fan, Karl wanted very badly and then kti himself. UnfortuSo he just killed himself.

FORUM education. This group meets Mondays, 6:30 p.m. at WPIRG. Students for Indigenous Rights - dedicated to providing support to the many indigenous peoples in Canada and around the world who are suffering from the destruction of their communities by the callous actions of corporations and governments. The Centre for Compassionate Living - focusing on the prevention of cruelty ro non-human animals by: pursuing legislation to protect animals in laboratories; researching the Canadian farming industry and promoting the benefits of a vegan/vegetarian diet; pursuing the enactment of exotic animal by-laws to prohibit circuses and travelling menageries; pursuing the banning of the commercial seal hunt along Canada’s east coast. Theatre @ WPIRG - exploring the use of theatre in addressing environmental and social issues. Whitewash - The Whitewash Action Group will be addressing health issues related to “feminine hygiene product5 Both pads and tampons are bleached with chlorine; dioxin, a known toxin and a by-product of the bleaching process can be absorbed by a woman’s body. Be daring! Try alternatives! Workshops on making your own pads and information sessions on the Keeperwill happen this Term, plus other stuff! Wilderness Action Group focusing on current wilderness issues and related topics; primarily on the clear-cutting of oldgrowth Ontario forests.

WPIRC WkTEkLOO PUBLIC IfhERe RESEARCH GROUP Student

Life

centre 0r

ht. 2578 cwpirg@wakewvl chttp://watservl

Volunteer

Room

2139

888-4882

.uwatsrlao.cas .uwatarlaa.ca/-wpirg,

opportunities

olunteers with WPTRG form action groups around a common issue of concern. As a volunteer or potential volunreer you are encouraged to participare in, or initiate, an action group. The number of active action groups, the issues chosen to work on, and the level of activity of each action group depend on you the volunteer. WPIRG staff and Resource Centre (including access to our library, computers, internet, faxmachine, phone, etc.) are there to provide you with assistance, information, resources and ideas. Action groups and projects this year (so far): 10 Days for Global justice challenging the push by transnational corporations to cnact a global “economic constitution”, the Muliclaccral Agreement on Investment and promoting the concept of fair trade. The next meeting of 10 days for global justice Scpcember 30,7:30 p.m., CJnion Station, St. Jeromes. Food Nor: Born bs - pro tests militarism and poverty by serving free vegetarian food to people in need working from the assump-

tion thar society and government should value human life over material wealth. By giving away free food to people in public spaces, FNR directly dramatizes the level of hunger in the community and the surplus of food being wasted. Public feedings on Saturdays. K-W LETS -a two year old local community network barter system with over 100 members where people offer goods and services for “barter dollars”. Propaganda Watch -Looking at the issues surrounding the media, including corporate control, portrayal of minorities and women, censorship and the general effects of the mass media on society and the individual. Propaganda watch meets on Thursdays at 7 p.m. at WPIRG. . Recycle Cycles - located in downtown Kitchener, unwanted bikes arc repaired by volunteers and provided to people in need for free or at low-cost. Our repair days are Tuesday and Wednesday, from 5-8 p.m. Student Action Organization - challenging the rising cost of

Pop Tarts, Part I: That sickly sweet filling

tortured artist. Those who draw the caterpillar crunch mounds from life’s box of chocolates have a greater reservoir of experience from which to concoct a truly profound and moving song+ To me, pop music represents the glorifica cion of mediocrity. Pop music is by nature disposable, and some artists have even

by Andrew Imprint

Krywaniuk staff

don’t get pop music. I mean, I - nderstand it in that same rudi 4 entary sense in which I understand women. .I can see its . basic appeal and even follow its trends, but I’m missing the grand d?sign - the method to the madricss. . 3.. ?.‘.. Music appreciation is like -‘-?.,uiine tasting: You can’t become an expert overnight - you have to develop your palette. Bur even the most novice conn’oisseur of wine can distinguish a Chardonnay ‘82 from a fine bottle of malt vinegar. What is the obsession with happy songs? A danceable beat is nice, but happiness is the shallowest of all emotions. It is only revealed when contrasted against other, more evocative moods. How many of the world’s great novels have been about characters who were overwhelmed with joy? Such a concept is too corny for words. Upbeat songs pass through mk like sawdust filler, but catchy songs were meant for advertising jingles. There is no myth of the l

You can’t bqcome an -expert overnight stopped coveting more than their fifteen minutes of fame. Despite their arrogance, I have to at least admire Oasis for desiring lasting greatness. I do not share Ayn Rand’s political idealism, but: I find her books insightful. In The FountainAt&, the villain, a columnist and critic, champions mediocrity because it is his only means of exerting any influence. By reserving his praise for the underdogs, he converts pop icons into disposable heroes. A friend and I swap demo tapes. He says he hasn’t learned to read music because he doesn’r

want to limit himself like I have. What a strange idea. How can knowledge be more limiting than ignorance? I think the whole tendency towards musical mediocricy comes from the “fit out” instinct (fit in/stand out). No one is better than anyone else - evevone is different so everyone is the same. The concept of fads really puzzles me, How can a song be good today, but tired and outdated tomorrow? If my opinion changes, I am embarrassed because it means that I once was blind, but now I see. Thus, as my musical tastes have matured they have also become more constant. Mozart and Beethoven never go out of style. To create truly innovating music we should be building on our musical foundations. But many genres are born out: of a return to basics. Someone told me that rap was more rhythmically complex than progressive metal. How often do rappers use tempo changes, syncopation, odd titie signatures or rhythmic superposition? The problem with pop music is that it is inherently superficial. From synthpop to big hair metal toalternacheez, the genre changes but the song remains the same. Actually, this applies to almost anything “pop.” Excluding CocaCola, of course. It’s the real thing.

IMPRINT,

Friday,

September

26, 1997

OutRage by Lauren Craig Stephen

am going into this column with mixed feelings. Part of me wants to defend, demystify, even champion my sexual orientation, another part of me is angry that it needs to be done in the first place. I mean, if you think because I’m gay I shouldn’t have rights, or I’m offending God, I’m somehow ‘sick’ and need to be cured, I can just say, “To hell with you.” I don’t need your approval to live my life. I believe everyone who’s gay says that at some time or another, at several times. That’s the primary reason a gay subculture even exists. Faced with a mainstream culture that often excludes us or treats us with hostility, gays and lesbians have created one for themselves. From time to time, turning our backs on those hostile forces in society may be necessary for sane and healthy living, but it’s not a solution to the problem. For every one of us, gay or

straight, there’s someone who doesn’t approve of who we arc or how we live, just as there’s always someone whose life we don’t approve of. It’s impossible not to interact with such people. At some point you’ve got to grow up and realize that no matter how much you want people to fit your view of how- the world should be, you really can’t change the way they are. No matter how much you hate it, I’ll still be gay. I know thar if prejudice and bigotry are essentiai to who you are, I can? do a thing about it. So I won’t cry. Like a good politician, it’s the undecided demographic I want to reach with this column: those of you who maybe tell the odd fag joke, but without hate in your voice; those ofyou who prefer not to think about gay sex if it makes you uncomfortable, rather than going on-and-on about how disgusting it is; those of you who don’t quite see how hating gay people makes you any straighter.

continued

else would the entire working population agree to pay for the trainingofZOpercencofthepopulation. John Ralston Saul came to campus and talked about functioning intellectuals, people who received a subsidized education should provide society with something useful. Was I the only one (Downey?) there listening? Why is IJW supporting such a program? Because the corporations who profit from these professionals are willing to pay (I think they should pay for a11of it) and the university has no money (not enough taxes coming in, funny enough). It certainly isn’t because we’ve been educated too much. - Paul Baines, Alumnas

from

page 9

est unaccounted for. Can anyone guess the percenrage of Federal Revenue paid by corporate taxes? 50 per cent, 30 per cent, 10 per cent? How about 6 per cent in 1994, the lowest of G7 countries, Meanwhile, individual taxes have risen to almost 60per cent; up from 35per cent in 1954. Universities are becoming subsidized training grounds for corporate cubicle contemporaries. I say becoming because I thought universities were created to make better citizens; people to participate in the development and improvement of their society. This might sound idealistic, but why

Grq+e

by Mike Yunker

X-Files False Alarm: People who think they’ve experienced “Lost Time” from an alien abduction, but in fact have suffered brain atrophy from McDonald’s commercials.

by Andrew Imprint

Kqwaniuk staff

hy do we need space exploration? Obviously, we need to put satellites in orbit in order to enable our communications systems and such. But actually sending spacecraft to other planets is ridiculously expensive and exceedingly difficult.

A long, dark journey into night

particles away from the spaceship, but this is hard to do when you are not traveling in a fluid medium. An anti-gravity shield would probably be the ultimate solution to the space travel problem, but current theories predict that gravitons do not have an antiparticle. The most practical method of enabling high-speed space travel would likeiy be to use a laser beam which scans the space ahead of the ship and destroys any obstacles in its way.

Why To send an unmanned spacecraft to Mars takes 18 months. The amount of food and air that would be needed to complete a manned mission would be very hard to take along. We would really need to transport an entire ecosystem in order to sustain an astronaut. Seventeenth century cxplorers would frequently spend years on 3 sailing ship heading for the new world, but modern voyagers are less patient and tend to honk during rush hour. We could theoretically decrease the apparent length of the voyage for the astronaut by speeding up the ship, but this is not practically feasible. There are two main obstacles to high-speed space travel. First, we dan’t sustainably acceleratethehumanbodywithaforce greater than about five times Earth’s gravity without harming the astronaut. Furthermore, barring some amazing new discovery, we’re never going to be able to make spaceships that have a top speed much higher than they have now. When minute particles of dust are flying towards you (or you arc flying towards them) at high speed, they carry enough energy to shred your spaceship into more pieces than an IranContra document. We don’t currently have materials capable of sustaining impact with space dust. One good way of protecting a spaceship from energetic dust would be to divert the flow of

But mining is still a possibility. Frequent cargo trips to export the raw materials back to Earth would be prohibitively expensive. However, using a special catapult that calculates the Earth’s future position when the material is scheduled to arrive, we could simply fling the material through space just as we used to send logs down a river.

Stations

in the sky

Exploring other planets is a fearfully expensive proposition, but having a permanent space station in orbit around Earth is not such a bad idea. A space station provides a valuable place to do zero gravity research and is a potential control centre for monitofing and repairing satellites,

colonize?

What is the point of colonizing a different planet? The only planet that we can reasonably hope to colonize in the foreseeable future is Mars. By colonizing Mars, we could increase the maximum population that our resources can sustain, but why do we need more people? Once we establish a civiliiation on a different planet, we are essentially isolated from physica contact with it because we are so far away. The benefit of having a larger population is that there are more intelligent minds available to pursue research and increase the quality of life. This is still true to an extent, even when the extra people are living on a distant planet. But distance serves to repress the flow of ideas. Even though we live in a world of global intercommunication, we still use airplanes to close business deals and attend conferences. It seems that personal contact is essential to human communication. LJnfortunatcly, it would be impossible to carry on a conversation with a Martian, as it takes around five minutes for information to tmvel between Earth and Mars, even at the speed of light. At best, conversation would be like phone tag. Frequent trips between planets would not be feasible, so future colonists would all have to be descended from a limited genetic stock unless they took scores of frozen embryos along with them.

The future

Sometimes you just need to get away from it all. cyberfair.gsn.org/smis/challenging/crowds.html

A new start I suppose that we might hope to colonize a planet in order to get a new start. You know. . .not ruin the ozone layer, not pollute the oceans and all that jive. These are admirable goals, but we don’t currently know of any planets with atmospheres that are suitable for human life. If we lived on Mars right now, our dwellings would have to look like something out of sci-fi movies. If we were actually capable of terraforming a planet, then we might as well just fix all the problems we’ve caused on Earth. Of course, it might be nice to have Mars as a practice arena to test that our ideas are going to work. We don’t want our newly reformed Earth to look like a mortar range.

wreck the environment. Of course, that doesn’t include the value of one of Earth’s most important commodities: gravity. The great part about space stations is that it is easy to get rid of garbage. You just throw it out the window, and as long as you throw it in approximately the right direction, it just flies away and you never have to see it again! There are many potential applications of having a space station in permanent orbit. Perhaps the most important future use will be as a power relay station. Imagine that we could put a giant array of solar panels in a close orbit around the sun. These power generators would beam energy back to the Earth through a series of relay stations in orbit around the Earth or on the moon. To encourage more rapid development of space habitats, perhaps we should open up to competition from the private sector. Although it’s probably a good thing that Mir wasn’t made by the designers of the Ford Pinto.

Unfortunately, life on a space station makes us realize just how vulnerable we are when we are out of our element. The currently planned Space Station Freedom is by no means intended to be self-sufficient, and life on space station Mir can only be described as precarious. A comprehensive study recently estimated the total value f Mother Nature at $23 trillion per year. This gives us a good “g estimate of the damage we

is when?

The future of space exploration seems bright. Governments have continued to support our missions to Mars despite the fact that budgetcuts have forced them to abandon potentially more useful projects such as nuclear fusion power plants. There is no doubt that the future of human technology lies in better exploiting the extraterrestrial resources of the solar system. But will the human race overflow the boundaries of our planet and populate the galaxy? Not for a long time, I suspect.

The copric connection by Andrew Krywaniuk Imprint staff

ast week’s science article, “Nanotechnology matures,” discussed the goal of Hybrid ‘i’echnology r\;lultiThreaded (HTblT) computer researchers to bypass the limits of standard computer architectures within the next ten years. Their job just got a little harder, On Sunday, IBM unveiled a new innovation that promises to raise the speed of their comput-

ers by 40 per cent. Their new discovery: a method of replacing the aluminum wires within computer chips with copper ones. Aluminum is normally used because copper is too hard to apply to the silicon surface of the chip. IBM has discovered a special compound that can be inserted beneath the copper layer. Engineers have long held that “you can’t get somethingfornothing.” Ironically, there seems to be no drawbacks to the new chip design procedure. Copper is a

better conductor than aluminum, so it can carry more current while dissipating less power. This is a huge boon for laptop users as it increases battery life. Not only is copper cheaper than aluminum, but the copper application process is also cheaper and easier to perform. However, don’t expect the copper-based chips to sell for less than their aluminum counterparts any time in the near future. Intel also announced that it had made a technological break-

through. Their new techniquecan effectively double the capacity a flash

memory

chip.

Previous advances havecome from packing greater densities of memory cells onto a single chip. Intel hastaken a new approach by encoding multiple bits of information in a single cell. The two new advances com-

tention of licencing its technique to other chip manufacturers. While IBM’s advance seems ground-breaking, industry analysts insist that it merelycompensates for the recent slowdown in new technology. The result: maybe by next year we’ll be able to boot our Polaris workstations in four minutes instead of five.

The date rape One woman’s by Rehana Dhirani special to Imprint tine 29, I997-M ontreral Jazz F&U&. A dozen friends J nearby. Crowds of people talking and laughing. Who would have thought I’d fall to theground, semi-conscious, the victim of a crime involving assault with a deadi): weapon and illegal drug abuse? I stood on a terrace overlooking the busy street below. A blues band was warming up. I sipped my drink, enjoying the few moments I had alone amidst the music and sunshine. That’s when he approached me. I-Ie introduced himself as FranGois Dcsjardins. WC had a short, pleasant conversation about our respective jazz experiences before we both turned to watch the band play. He was standing almost directly behind me. Wanting to comment on the band, I started to turn backwards to face him. As I did, I noticed a small white oval-shaped pill floating on the surface of my drink. Confused, I blinked and looked again. It was gone; typical of “the forget pill,” - also known as Rohypnol. Rohypnol is a pill which is commercially produced in Mexico and Europe. It is tasteless, odourIess, dissolves quickly in any drink and can take effect in a mere ten minutes. The effects can last up to 8 hours. The victim does not lose consciousness; the drug only initiates a relaxed feeling and a loss of inhibitions. Apart from memory loss, there are no side effects the next morning. The drug is considered to be ten times more powerful than Valium. FranCoissmiled and chastised me for not drinking enough on such a hot day. I realized he didn’t know that I saw the pill. I toid him I wasn’t thirsty. He moved incIose to me and encircled my waist with his arm. I thought he was flirting with me. As I pulled away, he pulled me closer. That was when I felt a sharp poke in the ribs. “Drink it or I’ll kill you,” he whispered in my ear. I looked down. When I saw that gun jabbing my side, I did as he asked and downed the entire cup without hesitation. I knew it was Rohypnol right from the start. Considering the disappearing properties of the drug, as well as my current situation with this stranger, it seemed obvious to me that he dropped the pill in my drink while my head was turned. I also knew that I only had a few precious minutes to get away from him before I

encounter

lose control of my actions. We struggled a little. (To the crowd, I’m sure we looked Iike a young couple frolicking at a summer concert.) He tried to appear nonchalant, whereas I screamed as loud as I could for my friend, Anki, hoping she would hear me in the massive crowd. Thankfully, she did. As she ran to me, Frangois saw her and cursed. He pushed me away, bolted into the crowd and disappeared. That was the last time I saw him. He never did would

feel it coming on already. I was losing track of time. I remember feeIing like I was floating in fragments, with my head heavier than the rest of my body. I struggled to open my eyes. I couldn’t. I heard all the questions people asked me, but couId only manage garbled responses. I couldn’t contro1 my speech; my tongue feIt like lead. It seemed the harder I tried to remember what had happened, the more determined my mind became to

drug

with Rohypnol burned the forms with a friend’s lighter the very next day before leaving Montreal. Why share my story? If I hadn’t had the confidence to believe that it was indeed a pill I saw in r-ny drink, I would have thought I had just imagined it. I would have laughed at myself for being so silly, drank the thing, and ended up completely at his mercy. He could have literally walked away with me in his arms, since oddities often go unnoticed in big

to walk by and slip something into a drink without being noticed. If you’ve just had a drink and you suddenly feel tired, &n’tbgy it. Sudden fatigue is the first abnormal feeling most Rohypnol victims experience. Tell someone to keep an eye on you, and not to let you out of their sight. Hang around friends and watch out for strangers. If you experience any of the symptoms I’ve described, or others such as nausea, blurred vision or dizzy spells, make sure you tell someone of your suspicion. Tell them you think you may be a victim of Rohypnol. Pass on all the information you can remember, and stay calm. As long as other people know what’s going on, you’ll be safe. I was. But true safety comes with knowledge. No matter how dangerous a situation you’re in, and no matter how much it seems like you’re losing, you can still win the game if you know how to play. In my case, Nrhat I knew probably did save my life.

Some facts Were are a few things you should know about Rohypnol,

+ same family of drugs as shoot that gun at me, but the nightmare had only just begun. As I sank into Anki’s arms and onto the ground, I heard comments like “kids these days” and “drunk as a skunk” flare up around me. To the average person, I guess I appeared inebriated. I heard the rushing of feet through the pavement. I felt Anki’s grip on my arm. I blurted out everything I remembered about Franqois Desjardins: he was about 5’8” and white, he wore black jeans, a belt, a black T-shirt and a backwards black hat. He spoke with a French accent and jabbed a gun into me. He told me to down the drink with Rohypnol in it, or he would kill me. By this time, I was sobbing so hard that my entire body was shaking. I kept repeating everything in German, hoping Anki would understand my description better in her own language. I was quickly losing control of my body. I reiterated my story frantically to the police in French and to my boyfriend in English, hoping that somehow all the relevant information would be exposed before I slipped into oblivion. I could

make me forget. I literally felt holes in my head from which a11 the details I was trying to convey kept spilling out. At some point I was in an ambulance, in the hospital, and at the Rape Crisis Centre in downtown Montreal. The police had reason to believe Frangois had done more than threaten me with the gun in the few minutes we were together: the belt on my jean shorts was missing and my zipper was undone. Tests were done. I was groggy. The nurses and doctors kept asking me useless questions, to which I could only give vague answers. I still don’t know how they could have expected a logical explanation of what had happened, since I was still obviously very much under the influence of the drug. One incompetent officer didn’t even know what Rohypnol was! They gave me forms which hack to be filled out before the police would even search for the criminal. To seemed hopeless. me, that Franqois (if that was his real name) could be halfway across the country by then. I was so frustrated by the futility of this system that I

crowds. Also, if I hadn’t known about Rohypnol and its effects, I wouldn’t have taken advantage of the few precious minutes I had before the drug took full control of me. I wouldn’t have screamed for Anki, and again, he would have had complete control of the situation. It doesn’t matter that we never caught him. The point is, I recognized what he was doing before it was too late. Granted, he forced me to take the drug. Flowever, because I knew what to expect, I was still able to remain in control even though Ae had the gun. Had I not known, I honestly don’t know where I would be today. You’ve probably heard a lot about Rohypnol by now, but my purpose for writing this is to offer you the unique perspective of what it’s like to be a victim &/eyou’re still a victim, notafrer the damage is done. A review: don’t take your eyes off your drink until you’ve finished it to the last drop. If you have to leave your drink unattended for any reason, leave it for good. Get a new one. God only knows how easy it is for someone

Valium, which are known as Bcnzodiazepines a ten times more powerful than Wium 1 illegal in North America 1 the drug has alcohol-like effects, so a person who has been drugged is often written off as drunk l effects include dizziness, impaired judgement and amnesia; ;zfso produces a relaxed feeli.ng, soothing the nerves and inducing sleep a the evidence of Rohypnol is flushed from the body in a few day3 i+ .the drug is colourless, odourless, tasteless and dissolves instantly in any beverage * it is commonly available on the streets for between three .and t&l dollars a pack * ...tfie. drug takes effect in abouti five to ten minutes after being’ digested

IMPRINT,

Friday,

September

HUMAN

26, 1997

Guys who don’t let their mothers dress’them by Stephanie Imprint

Upcoming fashion. events Studio

Voila “The

Speller staff

o men reallyeare about what they wear? Of course they do. Clothes are a form of personal expression, and can mean the difference between scoring a date or being thrown into the flaming jaws of rejection. According to several men’s magazines, the ’90s is the only decade that has ever offered so much choice in the search for clothing identity. From crushed velvet and animal prints to plain white cotton, shirts are available in numerous textures and colors. Jeans are still the norm, but cords and pleather offer a nice change for a day on campus. Shoes offer a never-ending choice of expression. Any shape, colou? or style works. If you are a male student, don’t be shy. Create your own style. Be different. Stand out from the crowd. And don’t be afraid of colour. . *it’s your friend. Here are a some guys who aren’t afraid to show a little style.

Flip

presents Side”

Downtown Jazzy Fashion Fundraiser

On Sunday, September 28, check out new and creative hairstyles on the runway and clothes from “Just Between Us.” Admission is a non-perishable food item and minimum one dollar donation. All proceeds go to the Food Bank of Waterloo.

On Thursday, October 2, listen to funky jazz and see an entertainingfashionshowwithclothesfrom several downtown stores. The fundraiser will take place at 1 Queen St. N., Ktchener from 6:30-lo:30 p.m. Admission is $10.00 All proceeds go to the United Way. Call 743-4115

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HUMAN

Living-withcancer by Lauren Nancarrow Clarke special to Imprint

W after

hat were you doing on October 12, 1995? It was the Thursday jusr Thanksgiving of that year.

Maybe you were handing in papers to professors or teachers. Maybe you had a cold and were lying in your residence, trying to down the orange juice your roommate had so graciously picked up for you at Brubaker’s. Maybe you

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have no recollection of that day. I do. That was the day I sat on a hospital bed surrounded by my family at Chedoke-M&laster Children’s hospital. At noon that day I heard for the first time why I had been tired and lacking in strength and energy that summer and the first month of grade twelve. This was also when I learned

a little about what would consume the next two years of my life. My doctors told me that I had been diagnosed, after blood tests and a bone marrow test, with Acute Lymphoblastic Leu kemia: cancer of the blood. My doctors were quick to inform me that the disease had been caught early. It was the “easiest” leukemia todeal with and it had a higher than eighty per cent survival rate,

IMPRINT,

Friday,

September

26, 1997

These things under

were great signs. All in all, couldn’t have been better the circumstances. I received my first massive chemotherapy dose the next morning. What started so abruptly is a process that I am still living through. Now, aImost a tenth of my life has been spent in treatmerit. 1 receive steroids and other drugs that, while poisoning and killing my good, healthy, powerful cells, are also saving me. It is amazing to me that so much of my life has been so “normal” the past two years and yet

pact on these individuals’ support networks. My family has been walking this path with me, sometimes in more fear and pain than I. Some of my friends have not known what to do or say, and some have pulled through in ways that still keep me warm. Over the next few months, I would like to share my stoT)r with you; my experiences with the health care system, in school, with family and medical professionals. I also want to invite any others who are dealing with an illness, disease or disability to do the

this been me, from

same. Perhaps by explaining our stories we can demystify one aspect of our lives, create solidarity and help ourselves and others. Everyone has a story to share and we all have a lot to learn from one another. Hopefully these articles can be one step.

shadow, this elephant has consistently walking beside and at times, nudging me my path to go off and graze. Cancer is not a disease that newborns, children or young adults are supposed to get. Neither is cancer an illness that adults and seniors should have to deal with. It kills, maims, and hurts the millions who receive the diagnosis. It also has an enormous im-

IMPRINT,

Friday, Scptcmber 26, 1997

IMPRINT Publications Ltd.

No mindless sheep please by Tim

special

CampbelI to Imprint

while ago, club days were held in the Student Life Centre where student-run clubs were on display for all. Some of you may have noticed a new addition this year that seemed a little “out of place,” caBed Freethought \!‘a tedoo, Amid some political, cultural and ten or so religiously based groups sat a table dedicated to the heathens of the school. short

The response I encountered was good, with ;I number of students signing up for more information, and some others rjucstioning the club’s intentions. Now, at this point, you’re either saying to yourself: “what the hell is this guy talking about?” (if you weren’t there) or “I sincerely believe that this guy is going to hell” (if you were). Frccthought Waterloo is the brainchild ofa computer scicncc graduate and a fourth-year science student who desired to do a great service to the non-believers in the area by assembling a forum where the damned-to-hell can express their secular

ANNUAL GENERAL MEETING

viewpoints in a civilized and unrestrained fashion. It is our dcsirc to be able to provide a service to these people by holding socials, discussions among individuals, debates with opposing viewpoints and seminars conducted by guest speakers. Also on the agenda are: a recommended reading list which wili be compiled from local sources; a web site; and, hopefully, a lending library in due time. Our first ever general meeting will take place next U’ednesday, October 1

from S:4S p.m. to 6:45 p.m. in Biology 1, Room 271 (the lecture hall with orange doors and no room numbers on it). All are welcome to attend whether ye be student, staff or faculty. The course of the club will be decided upon at the meeting, and interested individuals can show their willingness to fill the currently vacant executive positions. So come one, come all, and see just what this thing we call FreethoughtWaterloo is al1 about.

Friday, Sept. 26,19!V 12:30 p.m. Student Life Centre, room 1116 All registered University of Waterloo students who have paid the IMPRINT membership fee are invited to attend. The Financial Statementsfor 1996/1997will be presentedandthe new Board of Directors will be voted in.

Imprint quiz - How perceptive are you? by Rachel Beattie, Kimberly and Amber Ykumann, special to Imprint I. Wkn you are widking you 7lor?A7uhy:

Ellig,

thmugA campus,

a) see some of your friends and stop to chat b) see the Nike hat on the paper boy riding the Raleigh bike, three blocks away c) find yourself repeatedly face to face with the nearest tree, so much so that your significant other becomes jealous 2. You cm2 tell your beGjiie?zn is ang?y wirh you whz: a) he/she answers “nothing” when you ask what’s wrong b) he/she sneezes; it’s just not his/her regular perky sneeze c) his/her face turns the colour of boiled lobster as his/her hands reach to strangle you as the throbbing blue vein in his/her forehead nears the point of eruption

a) flirtation evolves into an exchange of digits b) he/she runs their fingers through his/her hair while looking your way., Everyone knows it’s an international symbol for “I Love You.” c) he/she is down on one knee, professing his/her undying love, and showing you his/ her new tattoo of your face on his/her. . . 4. While dtiving you notice: a) the third car ahead of you and the pedestrian on r;he l&.\r;liting, f~ cross, the sFre$t

b) the weaving Mustang five cars behind you, the stop sign three blocks away and the kid in the pink jumpsuit playing behind the tire of a parked car c) the post you just crashed into 5. You know the nrilk in rr!w refn~erurorkff~ gune fhd when: a) the expiry date was days ago b) your skin crawls as you- open the refrigerator door. Something’s not right with the milk c) you exclaim with astonishment: “Hey wow! Cottage cheese in a milk carton! Funky concept!” If you had mostfy “A%: Normy-Bumping into the occasional tree can be quite stimulating. Living with caution makes for a dull life. Check yourself into a psych ward. FAST.

‘If you had mostly

YE3n~:

Super-perceptive-“. . . the paranoia will destroy ya.” Have you ever considered that maybe all those things you are “seeing” aren’t there at all? If you continue to act the way you have been, people wil1 begin to avoid you. Check yourself into a psych ward. F,4ST.

If you had mostly

“CS:

Clueless-READ HERE! Is it obvious enough for you? Probably not. It’s amazing that you even noticed that this university has a student newspaper. Check yourself into a psych ward. FAST.

&a.&*@$&&~g~(-J~p~y,

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strategies for long-term economic growth--w&h include investment in new technologies and the recruitment of exceptiona graduates and

share our vision for the future. We till have representatives from our company at the Career Days to discuss your future with us. For more information about Dofasco, visit our website: www.dofasco.ca.

HUMAN

The funny bone.

IMPRINT,

Friday,

September

26, 1997

’ Where to go when you’ve got to go by Ryan Imprint

Pyette staff

fter a couple of years of sluggin’ it out at our beloved University of the enterprising student Water-loo, manages to pick up a few golden nuggets of knowledge that would help any industrious-minded learner stay ahead of the rat race. A packet of seemingly meaningless little truisms that prove a tad more useful than others. Here’s a short sample: Attending classes. Not so important. Knowing where to get cheap food on campus. Important. Memorizing the Bomber’s hours of operation. Very important. And after learning these lessons through the always-open School of Hard Knocks, there is still one valuable cidbit of information that towers above the rest. Places to poop on campus. To this day, I wish some empathetic senior student would’ve pulled me aside like I’m doing to you now, clasped his arm on my shoulder, and shook me, saying, “Look man, this is the way it is, and it ain’t gonna change. So for gawd’s sake, get it right the first time.” The topic is, of course, the toilets at UW: those that are safe, those to avoid, and the johns to head for in case of an emergency. It’s a big, scary world out there, and even within the friendly confines of Ring

University

Road, you’re stil1 not guaranteed a pleasurable recycling experience. So, to avoid overloading Health and Safety with scores of needlessly self-imposed constipation cases, take heed of these words of wisdom, taken from notes scribbled over four years of dumping, so that you too may never be stuck in a shitty situation again. I must footnote that most of my research was conducted in the men’s washrooms (sorry ladies). I can only assume that your toilets are in similar shape to the corresponding buildings. DANA PORTER: The key to understanding the big Arts Library in the centre of campus life is found in the proverb “The higher you go, the more they blow.” Stay as far away as possible from the tenth floor, and keep your crapping to the lower levels. As an example, there’s a spacious, personable set of porcelain found on the third floor. Always lots of toilet paper at hand, and spotless seats and floors. Understandably, there’s a high traffic volume, but when you gotta go, you gotta go. HAGEY HALL: They oughta install phones here, because these tiny rooms make prospective poopers clausterphobic. And when you’re anxious, you just ain’t gonna enjoy your visit. Head somewhere else. M ATT-1 AND COMPUTERS: Even if someone shoves a gun into your mouth,

of Waterloo

Federation

hold it in, brave lad and lass! LJnder no conditions are you to even chink of relieving yourself here. ENGINEERING: Despite the admirable academic record of our school’s brighcest stars, obviously no one has taught anybody Flushing 101 in these buildings. There’s usually unwanted Christmas presents floating aimlessly. I know they’ve scared me off. I no longer take morning classes slated for any of the engineering buildings, and neither should you. The Davis Centre, where the state-of-the art toilets flush themselves, is a much needed alternative, SCIENCE: You don’t have to fear any science geeks asking for samples of your masterpiece. These toilets are no-nonsense, let’s get down to business-type toilets. Don’t expect any inspirational thoughts while on these johns. Get on with it, and get back to class. The absolute MVP (most valuable porcelain) goes, hands down, to a certain toilet on the second floor of St, Jerome’s College. I kick myself in revealing this gem of a john, the head Head, the King of the Heinie Holes. A bathroom built for one, the door to the can actually locks, so you can enjoy a happy, uninterrupted pooping expcrience. The only thing it’s missing is an attendant. Let’s lobby the school to hire one! Quality t.p., spotless floors and can, and a window to gaze out onto the bustling

When

nature

calls you gotta photo

answer. by Laurie Bulcak

world around you. Here, life is poetry, but be sure not to lose yourself in your thoughts. There’s work to be done soldier. So that’s the list. Cut out this article, and keep it with you always. Pass it on to a bumbling frosh. As you know, where you choose to shit may not add years to your life, but it’ll definitely ;zdd lift to your years here at uw.

of Students

(contains fresh fruits and vegetables- small box $10, large box $15)

.:.:i_....

Order before Oct. 1,1997 Call Heather Calder at 888-4567 ext.6331

Students’ Council Election

ARTS REGULAR By-election to fill a vacancy on Students’ Council will be held Oct. 2, 1997. A polling station will be set up in the foyer of the Arts Lecture Hall from 9:00 am to 4:00 pm. Only Arts Regular students may vote. Contact the CR0 at x6781 for information,

October

3,1997

Buses and tickets available for the game. $11 for Bus+ticket, $5 for ticket only. Buses leave 12:30 pm with return. Tickets available at the Fed office. Tickets are limited so come early!

Legal Reso

e requires a

Co-ozinator

. .

Theresponsibilities include co-ordinoting freelegaladvice to students andtenantissues inquiries.Contact Kurtat ext.3780,ore-mailat kmschrei@FEDS.uwaterloo.ca

IMPI&,

Friday,

September

Voices 847ifY (4km4 21 - Apd 19) A supposedly close colleague may be trying to undermine your

26,

HUMAN

1997

from over your life right words: eat pork.

the stars in the basement now.

Two

Oh boy. You are going to have a really short fuse next week. Anything and everything is going to irritate you. It may be hard, but keep

an orange

with. Nerf balls are more dangerous than you think. Gmih

and body the into even haps cute who

(ilhy

simpler pleasures in life. A world of peace and relaxation may be closer-and +eap~r-than you think. Your s&l $i.l be cleansed and you’ll be,a 1 &+e4 with yourself again. A’ &’ !ch$olate can be a dangerous thing. A lot can be tasty.

around.

Woohoo! Great news is coming your way this week. Some-

no matter how difficult it is. Mice eat cheese. ‘I’hink about it. Vir-go (Azg. 23 - Sep. 22) You’ve got a deep dark secret that you’ve been hiding for a long time now. WelI, get ready, be-

trouble coping with things you thought would t~.r:a l-qeczc? Well, no lvondcr! V&r GGrs ., arc in a crazy align&S5 ,--, A&& now, causing a uloud of confusion to hover

sugimzn?is (Nov. 22 - Dec. 21) Contrary to popular belief, good things come in BIG packages this week. You should have only one motto;this week: go big or go home. Bu~&$sell big, eat big, drink b@+ ‘tl&$k$big. There will be man.~,.J&&#en advantages to doing thihgs on a big scale. There will be no limits to what

you can accomplish. Sperm whales are good swimmers. Cupticum (Dec. 22 -Jan. 19) You may not reatize it, but somebody, somewhere, thinks that you’re being a big jerk right now. Find op.t%whD..,.it is, and remedy the situ%@5 hecause you’re

portant. And d&4&~ soon as possible. Ladybugs are cute, tiny and dangerous. Aquatics (Jug. 20 - Feb. 18) Your family needs you right now. As much of a pain as it may be to visit with them, they really

need you right now. Somebody is going through a crisis and they’re going to nee t qb $motionally strong pers&? if , &$C$ to lean on in their tinq&$&&#. You will find happiness in a bowl of cheese. Pisces (Feb. 19 - Marc/t 20) Love is in the air, even if it is the wrong season for it. Take some time to enjoy the companionship of so G%bo.d who cares deeply about”!%’ s)b, &. 1 Keep each other warm chilly autumn nights each other’s compan the Pooh is disgustingly cute this week. Just grin and bear it.

Y- AIDS,awarenesskeek gets-off.on:l

21 - Jutw 20)

The weatherisgettingcolder, so arc your feelings for somcspecial right now. Now is time tqut th sizzle back . your relqti is Q up, otherwise colder da ii $ be ahead, pereven a’&eeq& Poodles are but watch out for their fur, knows what lurks within.

deal with all the fun and games involved. Try a raw egg, It% good for you.

After a hectic week, you’re ready to relax, right? Wrong! Next week will be even- more taxing on you so don’t F&F $9 long or you’ll get really far~,~~~$~~-Tang tough, and then y~~~ucgxr~ next weekend. Maybe. Remember, underwear is optional. STOqliU (Oct. A?? - Nov. L.2) ‘I’akc some time to enjoy the

pie moss the: country will be focusing their attention on the growing need for AIDS nwareness, National AIDS Awareness Week starts on Sunday, September 28, with AIDS Walk Canada, a fund-raising event that will bcnefi t AIDS organizations in the tri-city area. The slogan of this year’s we’re all

“AIWG

Issues.’

Bach yeary bewwn

week’s’ then-& the l%ds will bc handing out free catidoms at the fbmbshdter Qn Wednesday ni& ‘II& national campaign is fa. cusing on the changing face af AIDS, trying to emphasise the fact t&t AK% is a community issue. As Jann &den, singer and In- su~.porr

‘of ihis

199711998 P~Mn4lun ; rnnkPc*

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and 5,000 pople from ali walks of life ale ~~nuacti~g the preYenfabk virus,. ovef RaIfofwh0m & uadcr 25 years of age, If you’re. interested in takingpanin the;AlD$walk, pledge forms are avaliablr= from Heather Calder in the Feds office. Join US on $unday co show your support for the AIDS/HIV infected

Northern Dancer, the greatest thoroughbred Canada has ever produced, could speak Portuguese.

# 1 Warriors knocked clown by # 10 York Yeomen Grabbag Friday I’m honestly surprised that people are puzzled by the success of the Tampa Buy Buccaneers. All the keys were there: ia) a great coach in Tuny Dungy, who can get the most from his players. (b) pars of futility have produced many high draft picks, and the Buts have drafted solidly for the past three or four years. As a result, they have a very young, highly talented team that’s maturing as a whole, (c) a fairly easy schedule, based on last year’s sub ,.!XIUschcdule, plus in-division gamesagainst the Bears, Vikings and Licms. (d) brand-spankin’ new uniformsThe neon orange is no more, replaced by brand new red, blackand pewter duds, plus a more nefarious logo, Swashbuckling is out, the Jolly Roger is in. Don’t expect the Buts to contend for the Super Bowl, but hey, when you’ve been waiting since the mid-70s for a decent season from your team, this has to be great for the Tampti arca. Is there a message being sent by W3C in the wake of the Marv Albert situation? An interesting point was raised on Sports Overnight America recently in comparing the way the network handled 0. J, Simpson and Marv Albert in-light of their legal difficutties, When O.J. Simpson was charged with double murder, hc was quickly removed from his role as an on-field football analyst by NBC. True, it was a logical move, as 0.J couldn’t do a lot of game analysis from a jail cell, but the network acted quite convincingfy in the face of neither a conviction, nor an indictment. Conversely, when Marv Albert was accused of forcibly sodomizing and ~~agely biting a woman, NBC announced that Marv Albert would continue his work as NBC’s chief basketball play-by-piay mrdn, 8s well as covering other sporting event, The callers I heard drew links to racism, that 0. j+ lost his job because he was black and Marv Albert was white. Ugh. Hate that argument, because you’re racist if you disagree. The trick is to look not at the colour of the person’s skin, but other feasible qualities, Instead, look at profile and ask why-one was fired and the other was nbt+ O.J. Simpson was adequate at best as an analyst, rarely offering great insight into the game. There are dozens of ex-football players who already do an equal or better job on a weekly basis, and he’s now a distant memory at NBC. Marv Albert is acknowledged as one of the best and, more importantly, recognizable announcers working today, and that profile is something you just car;l’t replace. Simply put, Marv is nut as easily replaceable for the network as 0-J. O.J. was acq’uitted, but was not offered his job back by NBC. Watch for the aftermath of the Albert trial. If acquitted, Albert should continue without a hitch. If he is imprisoned, 0.). should have his resume ready, because there’ll be one cherry job opening, And, after four painful, underachieving years, the Blue Jays have f’inafjy pulled the plug on the Cite Gaston regime. About freakin’ time too. Again this year, the Jays played poorly with a strong lineup, and something had to be done;. Many stood up for Cita, pointing to his two World. Series titles and other accomplishments and the fact he deserves credit for it now. Know what? I got A’s all through elementary school, but no one seems to count that for me ~QW.

There

was a lot of love on the field last Saturday. photo by Peter

special

Austin to Imprint

ast Saturday’s matchup between the Waterloo Warriors and York Yeomen could have easily been billed as a list of exciting showdowns. There was the showdown between Hec Creighton Trophy candidates Jarrett Smith of Waterloo and Andre B&on-of York. It was a showdown of two undefeated teams in the OUAA. It was a showdown between two of the top 10 teams in the country. With all these showdowns, you wouId think that people would have turned wt in droves. Well, the 910 peowho actually Pie showed up for chisgame saw what might be one of the best games of the year. There were big plays from both teams, . and the game was close the whole way through. S.&z.&wn #I: Smith vs. Blztson - won decisively by Batson, despite Smith racking up 221 yards on 21 carries. Smith’s dominating performance on the ground will probably be overshadowed by his fumble on the York one-yard line that would have been a sure touchdown, one of the many Warrior blunders that turned the game in York’s favour. Batson, meanwhile, killed the Warriors on special teams, racking up 212 return yards, including a demoralizing 101 ‘yard kickoff return for a touchdown after the Warriors had iust scored one of their own. Batson also had 125 receiving yards and two touchdown receptions. S4~w&wn #2: The gr;rme - won not so decisively by York, 28-24. The story of the game was special teams, where the Warriors had a big can of whoopass served to them by Batson and the rest of the Yeomen. Warrior head coach Dave “Tuffy” Knight summed up his team’s special teams play as “disastrous.” “I’m not too happy right now with special teams... that killed us. [The thing] that demoralizes you quicker than anything is to come back and cut [the lead] down to three points and you kick off and the guy.. . runs the thing back

by Niels lensen

on you. All at once we had momentum and then bingo, the air goes out of you pretty quick when that guy runs that thing back about 85, 90 yards on you.” There were many plays that cost the Warriors on special teams. There was the 94-yard return of the opening kickoff by Batson that set up a quick field goal. There was Batson’s aforementioned 101 -yard kickoff return for a touchdown. There was the faked field goal attempt by York that turned into a touchdown reception for Batson. There were the two missed field goals by the usually steady Arek Bigos. There was the other field goal attempt that was blocked. Just about everything that couId happen to the Warriors did. Eliminate any one or two of these miscues, and the Warriors still come away with a vic-

York 28, WARRIORS 24 Football

tory.

There were some bright spots for the Warriors, however. The offence did manage to rack up448 total yards, including 313 on the ground, as the Warriors continued to show dominance in running the option. The Warriors just could not put anything on the scoreboard to show for their efforts. Quarterback Ryan Wilkinson continued to show that he may be the master of the option, running the ball six times for 81 yards, and managed to rack up 135 yards in the air on 7-of-20 passingwith two touchdown passes to Chris Amey and Andy MacGregor. The Warriors (2-1) are back in action this Saturday, as they travel to Toronto to take on the struggling Varsity Blues (O-3). Game time is 2 p.m. WARRIOR PLAYBOOK: Good news for the Warriors. Fullback Eddie Kim has returned to the team after an aborted academic stint at York. Kim is now getting back into game shape, and his return could help an already dominant backfield. Kim is a big fullback who exhibited signs of brilliance last year with his smashmouth physical running style. His presence also gives the Warriors tremendous depth at the fullback position. Look to see more of Kim as the season progresses.

IMPRINT,

Friday, September 26, 1997

SPORTS

Born to run

JarrettSmith is Waterloo’s star running bacl~

Game, set and match by Kevin Winger, special to Imprint David Markin, Andrci Tudor, and MarcJohannsen all went undtieated in Warrior Te?nnis action last weekend in Ottawa, leading the team to a pair of victories over the host Ottawa GeeGee’s and the visiting Brock Badgers. Team captain and three-year veteran of the team Markin and rookie German exchange student Johannsen swept aside their respective singles opponents in a convincing fashion, playing with excellent form, Then they teamed together in doubles play, to put a couple more victories under their belts.

Last year’s rookie of the year, Tudor, showed excellent form in winning both his matches in the tough court two position. He added great excitement to the weekend tournament by storming back from a 4-l deficit in the second set against Ottawa to take both the set and the match at 7-5, securing the Waterloo victory. Tudor teamed up with second year player Ralph Rank to win both their doubles matches. The Warriors went into the weekend a little shaky, rattled by illnessand injury. With theircourt three player forced to stay home by doctor’s orders, and their court six player unable to make the trip, continued

to page 20

Mr. Smith of Waterloo’s Men in Black, saving us all from the scum of the universe. photo

by Ryan Pyette Imprint staff

t’s not difficult to determine Jarrett Smith’s hometown. The Waterloo football Warriors’ prize tailback hails from Hamilton, the Steel City, Stelco-ville, where smoke-spewing smokestacks symbolize a long-running tradition of relentless, blue collar work ethic. Number 34’s heritage resounds in his running style. “Every runner is different; I’m more of a cutback runner, but I do hit the holes hard,” observes Smith, a fifth-year UW psychology major and last year’s OUAA most valuable player. “My breakaway speed had been lacking in the past, but I really worked hard at bringing my game to the next level.” At this new level, which ineluded 221 yards in the 28-24 loss to York last weekend, Smith still does the things that got him here. He hits the holes the way a Hamilton steelworker hammers another rivet into a testy piece of pig iron. Like a talented welder, Smith ignites his flame and bends defences to his will. Smith runs with the magnificence of a millwright, the artistry of an artisan. A workhorse with talent, putting in his time, paying his dues. The way a Hamiltonian is supposed to run. But back here at UW, Jarrett

Smith isn’t settling for some loCal-yokel Steeltowner persona, a good-old-guy who grudgingly punches a time clock, collects his paycheck, drinks Molson’s after a sweaty Saturday of work, and attends practices with the same disinterested passion of a union meeting.Smit&ants to improve. After a summer training camp with the Canadian Football League’s Hamilton Tiger-Cats, Smith received a rude awakening from the CFL big boys. “I looked over during drills at Ti-Cat camp and saw Jarrett go up against a 6’S, 270 lb. lineman named Morehead,” smiles Warrior coach Chris Triantafilou. “Jarrett made good contact, but just kind of slithered down like in a cartoon. He found out what’s needed to be a pro, and how important a tailback has to be without the ball.” Yes, Jarrett’s back, and while he’s here, the 24-year-old rusher will become the greatest runner in Waterloo Warrior history. With five games to go, Smith is a mere 626 yards behind fabled runner Tom Chartier (‘88-‘92), a Waterlooicon. Around these parts, Tom Chartier still is Warrior football. “Tom Chartier represents the past of Waterloo. I respect everything he’s done on the field, but I never had the opportunity to see him play in person,” says Smith, who recently passed former runI I .

by AIi Smith

ning mate Mike Malotc for second place on the all-time Warrior rushing ‘list. “All my yards have come in the past three years. My first two seasons, I had 200 yards - total.” But as Smith continues to distinguish himself, he discovers he’s a link in a chain -on and off the field. “When Tom Chartier graduated, people would ask us if we were worried that we’d lost the best runner in Waterloo’s history,” observes coach Triantafilou. “Now we have Jarrett, and once he’s gone, there’ll be someone else. Mind you, they still only come around once every twenty years or so.” And when that next special runner comes around at Waterloo, don’t be surprised if he’s being coached by Smith. “That’d be a dream come true if I could come back to Waterloo and coach,” says Smith, who has the bloodlines, being coached at Hamilton’s Barton High School by his father, Ken. And when that special runner comes around at Waterloo, don’t be surprised if his name also happens to be Smith, as in Payton Smith, Jarrett’s baby boy (at least he didn’t name him Emmitt). “He’ll be able to do whatever he wants, but of course I’d love him to be a footbali player,” says Smith proudly. Here at UW, so would we. . _ .

Offer excludes new nhases.

Exp. Oct. 3 1E97. Not valid with any other offer.

side door impact protection beams l 1.5L DOHC 16 vahre EFI 4cylinder engine l front wheel drive l power steering l AM/FM stereo cassette l tilt steering * dual mirrors + 60140 folding rear seat l

SPORTS

IMPRINT,

Friday,

September

26, 1997

Warriors defeated results they were aiming for. Both coaches and players knew that if they had stayed with their game plan, things would have eventually turned around and the Warriors would become major players in the league. But, on Saturday the Warriors showed a real lack of character. The absence of a strong sense of aggression, desire and commitment found the Warriors losing four nil

Laurier4, WARRIORS 0 Brock5, WARRIORS 0 SOCCER to cross town rivals, Laurier. On Sunday, the Warriors. travelled to St. Catherines to face the Brock Badgers. The first away game had brought Waterloo their first points of the season, and the team was hoping for more success on the road. It was once again a lapse in concentration that cost the Warriors three points. Although Waterloo controlled much of the play, a ten minute breakdown resulted in Waterloo giving up five goals and another chance to get their season on track. The weekend produced some of the worst soccer play this season by the Warriors. Coach Eddie Edgar gave the players a day off to regroup, but warned chat a new attitude would be in order at practices this week. So watch for the Warriors to take it to the MuMaster Marauders this Saturday. _ I

The Soccer Warriors now find themselves in the basement of the OUA West. photo

by Laurie Bulchak

by Amnn Singh special to Imprint

n Saturday the h,len’s Varsity Soccer team continued their roller coaster ride of a sctison. So far, the Wa’rriors have played outstanding soccer, but have not been able to produce the

bv K.W. Oktoberfest and 1996 Gastfreundschaft Award Winner

The Athena Soccer team defeated Laurier 2 to 1 last Saturday. The team travels to McMaster this weekend. photo

continued

from

Laurie

page I 9

they were forced to call up A.4an Sham and stant feel “the ream is one of the must Joel Blit from the substitutes’ bench. In dedicated [tXtey’w] mm, artd if they fact, Blit got the caH to play less than candnw m pmxice as hard as they are . an hour before the seam van feft for Ottwa. now, things will only get better.” Both players played ‘exceptianalfy well in The warriors will be in’ action at their debut, te;lming up tu kin their two’ ::, home. this weeked (Saturday, Septemdoubiesmatches. Shamadded a keypoitit :;, per 27, from f&00 a.m. - 6:OO p.ml) as by winning his singlesmatch tijjainst Brock,. *hey play host t6 Western and McGifl. With.ftiur points from thre weekend The matches will be played at the WC+ victories, the Tennis Warriors &1X once; . te$oo Tqrnnis Club (beside !.Jniver+ again Be: in contention fox a pl,ayoffberth. S&&m) akd fans are always welcome W Coaches Msrrin Johnston and. Davk Con- ’ at&d.. .:

A radical concept Tom Mother Boyle.

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ONTARIO’S LARGEST STUDENT NIGHT Thursday, October 16 - 730 pm to 200 am Students...experiancethe largest authenticOktoberfest StudentNight. Featuring:Oom Pah Pah band,and DJ. between sets, Bavariandance groups. Admission: 58.00 in advance IlO.Ml at the door per person (tax included). #ice of admission includes a souvenir mug for the first 1000people.

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IMPRINT,

Friday,

SepteInbcr

26,

1997

It’s all good .or not l

by Ryan Chen-Wing Imprint staff orst game ever,” said Warriors rugby coach Derek Humphreys of the team’s 25-3 victory over the Varsity Hlues last Saturday which gained them sole possession of first: place in Ot JA Division Two rugby standings. For most of the first half, the

W I

In the penultimate play before the half, rookie outside centre, Mike Naylor, broke through Toronto’s defense on their twenty-two and ran down the touch-line for the long-awaited first try of the game. After the half the Warriors took the field with a bit more hunger for the scores they’re used to. Captain and eight-man Mackcnzic Jaims and winger Jeff

WARRIORS 25, Toronto 3 RUGBY

only scores on the board were one penalty each, a score of 3-3, In set pieces throughout the grime hooker, Jtimie I Iecr, stoic the ball an amazing cighr times in strums against the head, but Waterloo rarely capitalizcd on the possesslon. ‘I’hc Warriors relentlessly but almost fucilcly ran the ball at the Blues, but rarely S~JCL’Wdd in brerlking the gain-lint. N’hen going into contact, bad positioning and containment caused turnovers in second phase play a number of times.

Naylor, Mike’s older brother, each scored a try to increase the Imd over IJ of T. Overall, the Warriors met their best competition yet and responded with a performance that needs improvement. It was a good enough win, but nothing like the more than thirty-point leads of both previous games and nothing like the level of play required to avoid relegation in IX vision One. Tomorrow the varsity and junior varsity teams travel to Peterborough to play Trent.

WarriorsandAthenas geta runningstart by John Lofranco special to Imprint

he Warrior and Athena Cross Country teams opened their respective seasons last weekend at the Western Invitational Meet in London. The Warriors managed their best finish ever, while the injury-riddled Athenas are clearly in a rebuilding year. The Waterloo men’s Cross Country team is as strong as it has ever been this year with strong returning veterans and a great bumper crop of rookies. The Warriors finished ninth in the meet and fifth among Ontario schools, as they were competing against Waterloo’s OUA rivals as well as some powerful American squads from Syracuse, Buffalo and Colgate Universities. Stephen Drew was the top Warrior finisher, coming in an improved 3Sh. Third year Environmental Studies student Jeff Wilson was close behind. Team captain John Lofranco rounded out the scoring for Waterloo, in 74’h place. Coach John Swarbrick had this to say about his team: “I’m thrilled! This is the best team I’ve coached in seven years!” This team has a lor: of depth and even more potential for improvement;

der 38 minutes for the 1Uk. It doesn’t stop there - there are about five or six more Warriors who could step in and clock times comparable to those. Coach Swarbrick is going to have a tough time choosing the final seven Warriors for the OUA team this year. The next step is tomorrow in Windsor as the Warriors will preview the OtJA course at the Windsor Invitational Meet. The Athenas are obviously in a rebuilding year, with five of the seven women from last year’s CIALJ championship squad now retired. Kim Ross and Lynn Coon remain and with Track and Field veterans Blanka Sharma and Meagan Hamilton they hope to build another distance dynasty for the Waterloo women. That quest is currently on hold, with Ross nursing a sore Achilles and Hamilton bothered by knee trouble. However, Sharma and Coon did their best this weekend at Western to keep things together. Their strong performances were accented by rookies Ellen Schappert, Ame-Lia Tamburrini and Shauna Ellis, all of whom turned in great performances in their Athena debuts. The team’s web page has been designed by top Warrior runner Stephen Drew, and should be available for viewing in the cs

your next purchase with your valid College HOW until

October

ID.

41997,

Regular & Clearance priced merchandise only. For the store nearest you call 1.800.447.4371 or visit our web page at www.pierI .COM.

SPORTS

by Mae Cantos, Campus Recreation Publicity Coordinator special to Imprint

Triathlon

(try saying that five times fast) by contacting Brian Cartlidge @ x6996 for det;dils.

Campus Recreation registration round-up

no duathlon

Due to the construction on the east side of campus, near Engineering, the Tri-A-‘I’riathlon has been reduced to a Do-l’heDuathlon. With the ongoingpaving of the road, the bike component has been omitted from the event, b.ur don’t worry, you can still do the 8OOyds swim and the 5.1 Ii run. The swim will be at the PAC pool and the run will take place on the path along the rGlrt,;ld side of Ring Road due to the construetion. Other options for the bike component to take place were looked into, but due to the lirnitcd time and resoufccs the bike component w;1s climinrltcd. Although there isaslight passibility (through some divine ;1ct #f&d) that the construction may be finished in time to reinstate the ‘i’ri-A-‘l’riathlon, participants can look forward to IWl‘he-Du (apologies

hhntrtin

The event is raking place day, Scptcmbcr 27, rJin or You can still sign up for rhis ing, exhausting, cndurancc

Dew).

Registration for the many wonderful programs and services that Campus Ret has to offer was held last week. There was a frenzy of people trying to sign up for everything from aerobics classes to swimming lessons, and assorted clinics. Classes offically started this week and there are still openings in some activities, depending on the class. There were approximately two thousand people who registercd and there were an additional two hundred on the waiting list, half of which have been placed in extra spaces in classes. Bccausc ofthc interest expressed, Czlmpus Rcc has added additional classes for activities such as Yoga and Social Dance coiirscs. People can still sign up, so hurry and register - this might be yr~ only chance to finally learn how to fox-trot and time’s-atickin’.

Satur-

shine.

League

sign-ups

excit-

cvcnt

Withtheleaguesign-upsover

and done with, both the Competitive and Co-Ret Leagues are underway in al.1 sports except for Waterpolo, which starts this weekend. In the Competitive League, Volleyball and Basketball are the usual favourites with an additonal 23 teams this year for both sports over last year’s team numbers. For the Co-Ret League, Basketball and Soccer are new additions to the roster and are doing well with 38 teams signed up for both sports. Both Leagues are starting the season off well, and we look forward to the future standings. Play on!

IMPRINT,

players and a draw for a nice, shiny Black Knight racquet at the end of the regular season. All this and more could be your for the low entry cost of $15. The players’ meeting is Thursday, October 2, at 4145 pm in PAC 1001. Enter now and fill out an application at the Campus Recreation Front Desk, PAC 2039, today!

Friday,

September

Sailing

26, 1997

and windsurfing fun!

The Sailing and Windsurfing Club is once again alive and looking for new members. The organizational meeting will be held on October 1, 4:30 PM at PAC 100 1. For further information contact Jon: 725-4089 or JQJPOCOC@ELECTRICAL.

Squash - the sport, not the vegetabIe Calling all squash players! The Black Knight Squash House League has extended their final entry deadline to Tuesday, September 30 for all of you die hard squash fans ! This league offers the opportunity for people to play with others of the same competitive caliber. The league has three levels of play and runs for six weeks. The play times are Monday and Wednesday, 530 to 9:30 pm, Tuesday and Thursday, 250 to 610 pm, and Sunday, 11 am to 6 pm. There are weekly prizes for Imprint

file photo (seriously!)

Leaders of the week

Erin Campbell

Tanya

In her first term as a lifeguard, Erin has shown her paticipation with Campus Recreation to be an important one. She has helped the Aquatics Team to run the pool smoothly for the first two weeks of school. During this busy time, she was one of three

people

who

worked

all the shifts prior to hiring the Fall Aquatics Team. A secondyear AHS student, Erin is a model to all students to get involved. We hope to see Erin keep on doing the great job she’s done and congratulate her efforts.

Chintz

Tanya has proven her commitment to Campus Recreation through her two term duty as a lifeguard. She is one of the three people who worked ail the shifts prior to hiring the Fall ‘Aquatics Team. She went well above the call of duty for the first two weeks of school in helping to keep the pool running smoothly. Campus Recreation would like to extend their thanks for a job well done and hope that other will learn from Tanya’s example. Congratulations on being Campus Ret’s Leader of the Week.

IMPRINT,

Friday,

September

SPORTS

26, 1997

Athletes

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Heather Moyse

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1: Ottawa Gee Gets 2. Western Mustangs 3. Mount .4llison hlounties 4. York Yeomen 5. WmAI%K) UPUUUURS 6. Guelph Gryphons 7. Saskatchewan Huskies 8. llHC Thunderbirds 9. Manitoba Bisons 10. Calgary Dinosaurs

AthenaSoccer A second-year athlete from P.E.I., Moyse scored three of the four Athena goals on the weekend in a win over Laurier and a loss to Brock, Moyse, who doubles as a crack athlete in the winter, was named the Athena Rookie of the Year after the 1996-97 sport season.

Andy McGregor WarriorFootball A third-year Arts student from Waterloo, McGregor caught five passes for 95 yards and one touchdown as the Warriors dropped a close game to York at University Stadium. McGregor’s punt returns for a total of 74 yards also gave the Warriors good field position on several occasions.

University of Waterloo

Federation of Students

SCIENCE SOCIETY 1997-9s

EXECUTIVE ELECTIONS All Science students are eligible to vote for *the 1997-98 executive. Elections will takeplace Oct. 2,1997 from 9:00 am to 4:00 pm, A polling station will be set up outside the Science C & D. Contact the CR0 at x6781 for information;

King of the fairies New music that your parents may like too Ashley

MacIsaac

-Lul”‘s September 20, 1997 by Liz

Monier-Williams Imprint staff

shley Maclsaac was part of Another Roadside Attraction this past summer and it shows. The Cape Breton fiddler’s stage presence has improved remarkably over the past few years, transforming him from some guy with a fiddle to a first class stage presence. Such was the case last Saturday night at Lulu’s. MacIsaac opened his show last Saturday night with “WingStock” off his 1995 Hi, How Art You 2%&y? release, beginning with a piano so10 and then quickly switching to his fiddle as the rest of his band, The Kitchen Devils, took the stage. The evening showcased MacIsaac’s impressive repertoire, including everything from what he termed ‘Cape Breton favourites’ to a special version of “Staying Alive,” with his fiddle substi-

Fiddling about. photo

by Laurie Bulchnk

tuting for the vocals. He joked with the crowd throughout the set, at one point remarking that “there are a lot of ferries in Cape Breton-I’m their king.” Halfway through the set,

MacIsaac played a non-stop fifteen minute solo that ended with three somewhat mangled bows landing in the hands of his ecstatic fans. “MacDougall’s Pride” immediately followed on the heels of the solo, providing a momentary break from urban dance and highlighting MacIsaac’s skill with more traditional pieces. The only disappointment of the evening was that Mary Jane Lamond was unable to appear with the band, as she is currently on tour with the Chieftains. MacIsaac did perform the tragic “Sad Wedding Day” without her lilting voice accompanying him in Gaelic; but thankfully did not add his own dubious vocal talents to the piece. Throughouttheshow MacIsaac roved the stage, playing up to different parts of the crowd and occasionally breaking into dance while still fiddling. With sweat running off his arms and concentration straining his face, it was clear that he was in his element. His ceaseless energy proved to be infectious, and the crowd

The earmuffs are just for show. photo

by Niels Jensen

was jumping around like a bunch of drunken frosh in no time. With his recent effort to appeal to an older audience, this was somewhat disturbing. Picture your grandmother bopping up and

down in the mosh pit beside you, and you’ve got the general idea. Ninety-five percent of those who went to this show haven’t had to show their proof of age of majority in thirty years. A better concert venue for this show would have definitely brought the median age down a few years. Ashley has developed a marvelous stage presence at this young age, and his showmanship is developed way beyond his years. He was the recipient of the Best New Solo Artist of the year and Best Roots and Traditional Album awards at the Juno Awards in 1996, and followed that with the International Artist ofthe Year award at this year’s Junos. His talent can only improve in years to come. A fine show from a truly charismatic performer who knows how to stir up a crowd. If you missed the show, either because you didn’t know about it, or you were too afraid to go to Lulu’s, MacIsaac will be at the Ford Centre in North York, Saturday November 22.

Playing the game of Life this is better than your last game of Monopoly The Game fhztdby Hyland

LkTw’dFi& theatre, Kitchener

by Iaian Duke special to Imprint

their

life. Despite a somewhat slow beginning, this film is really enjoyable. Since everyone knows that the game is coming, it takes an unnecessarily long time to get it started, about 40 minutes to be

events part of the game? l?art of some conspiracy by a all powerful evil corporation? Or just coincidcncc? With all the betrayals and lies Douglas encounters, his growing sense of paranoia is understandable. In .fact, he is so con-

exact. The idea is to show Douglas’ life, but how long does it take to show that he is crabby and boring? Once the game is afoot, however, it is a terrific ride. The picture keeps the audience guessing throughout, and nobody ever really knows what the game is, or who the Consumer Recreation Services (the creators of the game) are. Are certain

fused and scared it seems like he might end up in a mental institution by the film’s end. The double role that Michael plays may have ’ confused some viewers due to its unique fashion. The use of older looking filmstock is the only thing separating the flashbacks from the current . events. At one point the take off of a plane is filmed in the older

his movie starts in a unique and artistic manner. The opening title sequence is fresh as it has no music, only an opening montage of Michael Douglas’ childhood This helps set the memories. stage for what is about to come. Michael Douglas’ character in TlteGameis an insanely wealthy divorcee, who by all appearances has everything you could wish for. However, it does not take the viewer long to see something is missing from his life. He celebrates his birthday alone, has no close friends, and is generally short-tempered with all those around him. So on his 48th birthday, his brother, played by Sean Penn, decides to enrol1 Douglas in the game. The game, it turns out is a contest specifically designed for each participant to test their physical and psychological limits and to supply whatever is missing from

film stock although it is an event that should be occurring in the present. There are some obvious solutions to some of the puzzles, and even an idiot would know where a certain hidden camera is. Most of the time, though, the viewer doesn’t know where the plot is going next, and there are a few genuine surprises. David Fincher directed this movie with the skill and style that he showed in Seven. It’s often obvious what Douglas’character (Nicholas Van Orten) should do next far before he gets around to doing it or even realizing that it is part of thegame. Sometimes its hard to believe such a successful person cbuld be so incredibly stupid. Still, the larger picture leaves the viewer guessing. T was always trying to figure if it was still just a game, or was it really something else? David Fincher combines creative camera angles and excellent lighting to make some of the most beautiful scenes out this year. In some ways, some elements were reminiscent of his previous work, Polaroids were used similarly in Stem, and there

is a falling scene similar to the finale of Alied This film should be a big success, and a large part of the credit should go to blichael Douglas and Sean Penn. Douglas exudes the sameevery man quality that made his father such a legend. This star quality makes the viewer care about and identify with his character. Sean Penn seems to be making a comeback recently, and this role is a good reason why. He lights up the screen with a manic quality, making every scene he’s in a joy to behoId. For some reason, he decided tospeak in a weird voice for this role. Besides that, and the sometimes disturbing lack of realism, this film is a definite must see.

IMPRINT,

Friday, September 26, 1997

ARTS

Questioning the truth numerous complex observations about human nature. There is no single dominant message, but the emotions that recur in the story lines are inextricably linked. Wolff appears to warn against simplification of emotions, and he never neglects the subtleties of human behaviour. Many of the characters in Tk Nig&fi9r Question believe that they and they alone know the truth, persisting even in the face ofcomplete contradiction. In “The Other Miiler,“when a young man in the army is called out of his fox hole to hear that his mother has died, he denies it, believing that he is fooling everyone else into letting him go home. Wolffs characters seem to find their need for other people oppressive, but they can present only

To& Wol$ Vintage 206 pages, $16.95 by Katie Imprint

Ricks staff

o one should be alone in this world. Everyone should have someone who kept Faith, no matter what, from all the way. ” This comment, the title story of Tobias U’olffs latest collection of short stories, Tire ./V&$2 in Questiolr, describes a theme that links WolfI harsh, beautiful narratives of how we reconcile (or tragically fail to reconcile) our need for self-protection with our need for other peopk. WoIff has received The Na[ional Book Award, the Los Ange/es Ti’mts Book Award and the PEN/Faulkner Award for previous short story collections, a memoir, T’iduy ‘.sL@, and a short novel. In The N@$ztitr Q~esriun, as in his memoir, Wolff uses violent imagery brilliantly, avoiding the grotesque even when describing a bullet entering the brain or a man biting a dog. I Ie writes unflinching accounts of people driven to be (and to protect) themselves. He is a master of motive, rccognizing that lack of reason is often rhe only reason we have. While each story in this collection presents unique ideas and

settings, a common thread among them is that people are damaged when they compromise the truth for their own benefit or another’s Why they persist in deluding themselves that the); alanc can see truth, and why they believe that there can ever be one truth, is an intricate mystery that no one can solve. However, Wolff examines its every painful angle, re-

vealing how harmful people can be in their confusion over how to be true to themselves while allowing others to rely on and love them. Wolff leaves an impression that his characters may expect too much of those around them and of themselves, but that it would be dangerous to expect too little. At their hearts, the stories bear

the appearance of self-reliance. At times self-loathing, their thoughts often construct a sense of persecution, present and potential, that contradicts the equal harm they inflict on others. The main character of “Migraine” says that she has lost her ability to perceive the truth “because she had been involved with other people, and other people muddied the water,“yet her actions toward her roommate show that she is an equal partner in the obstruction of honesty. The Night itr Question examinesoriginallyand unpretentiously how much easier (and ignorant) it is to accept the clear half-truths we can construct alone, rather than the confusing whole truths we must come to when dealingwith someone else’s perspective, someone else’s life.

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Huh. .Say what? l

An arts commentary or something by Greg Imprint

Picken staff

emember back to the summer of 1997? Remember a little song getting a lot of airplay? Remember a little song called MMMBop by the Hanson moppets? Remember if any of that song contained words, or just syllables? If you can’t, welcome to pop music. Welcome ta an age of music where the meaning is irrclevanr, thecontext is pointless, and more often than

not, a Beavis

and Rutthead

critique contains more intellect than the song itself. In today’s world of disposable pop stars, I suppose it’s really a waste of time to try and write something intelligent. By the time people actually figure out alt the words to your song, you’ve gone the way of the Primative Radio Gods. Or, if people accept and enjoy what you’re singing, you turn into Aerosmith or the Rolling Stones and spend rhe next several decades mocking your own success. That’s what I guess chq’re doing right? Aurosmith’s notger-tingworse, they’re just satirizing their old stuff. Right?

Whereas in the past millenium or two, wherein music was used to accompany the words, which would convey a story or a lesson, popular music in the past few years has taken a dramatic shift. Now, it’s all about a good guitar riff, or a smokin’ bass line, and if you can make the lyrics rhyme, even better. Add to the limited song-writing requirement the emphasis on the visual component brought on by the on-going video revolution, and we have a music world populated by vapid. prettyboys (Hi Gavin!) who couldn’t write a meaningful Iyric if their musical career depended on it. Really, “Breathe in, breathe out, breathe in, breathe out.” Absolutely brilliant. What we have here is brilliant division of the music industry. On one level, we have the Silverchairs of the world, writing shallow, trivial music. On the next level, we have artists like Meredith Brooks, churning OUT. radio-friendly songs that are designed to take advantage of a trend, rather than individual expression. On the last level we have artists like Pavement and They

Might Be Giants, who string words together to sound intellectual, but probably don’t. Things don’t look any better for the future, with electronica hitting the North American shores. In electronica, no one really cares what you’re saying, as long as they can dance to it. Thus, Daft Punk can put out a great CD with almost no vocal work, and garner two club hits, Chemical Brothers go with only the occasional vocal performance, plus many others. How about Prodigy saving the music industry? Keith Flint can chant “I’m the firestarter!” fifty, sixty times in a song and no one bats an eye because they’re too busy dancing. When will this trend end? Or more importantly, will it? Will music continue to devolve? In twenty years, will popular music consist of just a drum beat, and probably not even a good one? Only time, or possibly hlTV, will tell. At least, it‘ it’s any consolation, when pop lyrics are so devoid of meaning, people like Pat Boone can’t come along and suck the life out of a song. That’s gotta be worth something.

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IMPRINT,

The other Dickinson Bruce

Dickinson w/ Puller

September by Andrew Imprint

2 I, 1997 Krywoniuk staff

f you htiven’t heard r,f Bruce Dickinson then shame on you. He is best known as the operatic vocalist for the British . metal band, Iron Maiden. His current tour reunites him with longtime songwriting pilrtnerand

ex-Maidenite, Adrian Smith. When he left Iron Maiden, Bruce claimed that he would never do a reunion show or perform Maiden songs live. This tour forced him to eat his words. The first band to take the ‘stage was the Oklahoma quartet, Puller. This is the kind of band that gives metal a bad name. ‘They showed the odd progressive touch, but most of their music is as subtle as an axe, It’s fun to watch a high-energy band play

live, but I didn’t whelming urge CD.

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The standout musician in the band appears to be the drummer, but unfortunately his styledoesn’t fit well with the rest of the band. However, in the finale, an anthem about freedom, he played a powerful military drum beat that really complemented the guitar. This song proves chat Puller do have the potential to play hard but melodic rock. The next band in the lineup was GZR, a vehicle for ex-Sabbath bassist, Geezer Butler. Compared to Puller they were pretty tame. Mostly because they didn’t show up, After an eternity of sound checks, Bruce finally took the stage. The mostly thirty-something crowd cheered loudly, especially when he introduced “Mr. Smith.” It is ironic that Adrian chose to tour with Bruce, seeing as his cited reasons for quitting Maiden were his difficulties play-

Studio

ing live. The set started off with a series of tracks from Bruce’s new CD, Accident of Biti& and I’ll be damned if good 01’ Bruce can’t still cry and wail like an air-raid siren. There’s no one like him anywhere, except maybe Andi Deris from Helloween. One new song, “The Road to Hell,” had’a real AC/DC sound to it. He also played “Tattooed Millionaire,” his criticism of big haired ‘80’s bands. The addition of a second guitarist allowed the band to do credible versions of several Maiden classics, including “Powerslave,” “Two Minutes to Midnight” and “The Prisoner.” Bruce even recycled the old crowd banter from Live Afief Deutfi. Adrian Smith played well, but he was outclassed by Roy 2. from the Tribe of Gypsies (Bruce’s backup band). However, Adrian’s real talent, his songwriting, was readily apparent on the songs from the new album, many of which featured the signature Maiden sound of counterpuntal guitar lines in thirds. And the good news is that he will be remaining with Bruce to help record the next album, Bruce gave an excellent concert overall, and the screaming throngs were left begging for more. There was no way that he could have forgetten his Iron Maiden roots, and I’m glad he didn’t. After the concert he returned to chat with his fans, who could have stayed for another entire set if it had been possible.

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Pernod Contest #2: name this guitarist who visited the bomber last week, and tiin yourself a -nifty prize From Pemod, the alcohol of champions! Hint: they’re ‘from Hamilton!

tour At Imprint, we believe that anything that is free is worth checking out. On Saturday, October 4, .and Sunday, October 5, you can stroll through the homes and studios of ten artists, who will have their works on display. Some of these works are jewelry, drawings, oil paintings, pottery, silk painting, watercolors, weaving, bonsai, glass, and sculpture. The best part is that it is entirely FREE! There is plenty of bicycle parking, and the pace is casual. These artists’ homes will be open Saturday between IO:00 a.m. and 500 p.m. and Sunday between I:00 p.m. and 500 p.m. Head east from King St. on John Street to begin your tour, and don’t forget co pick up your self-guiding tour brochure toguideyou around. The artists’ honks are on Allen, John, Herbert and Union, and are all clearly marked.

Waterloo Concert Band : Serving uw students Since the University of Waterloo doesn’t have either a concert or a jazz band anymore, your hidden musical talents are probably going to waste. It’s not the end of your musical career, however, because the Waterloo Concert band needs you! If you want to play some orchesteral transcriptions in a regular serting, your prayers have been answered. Founded over one hundred years ago, this band is made up of university students as well as a large portion of adult music lovers. The material played ranges from “Phantom of the Opera” to “StarWars”toBerlioz’s Symphonie Fantastique. Rehearsals are every Monday at the Adult Recreation Centre on King Street in Uptown Waterloo. Every year many students from U of.W play with the band, adding a youthful exuberance to the sound. The concert series this year consists of Spookfest at Halloween, Winterfest at Christmas, and Mythfest, a collection of Greek hero anthems. All concerts are at the recently refurbished Waterloo Stage Theatre on King Street. If you have a special taste for orchestra, and especially if you play percussion, sax, clarinet or low brass, come out and play! Contact Cameron McBain at 725 7229 for details.

IMPRINT,

Friday,

September

ARTS

26, 1997

Kitchener-Waterloo 0 era

Coming soon to the Centre’in the Pquare Don Giovanni featuring baritone

world-renowned Jason Howard

itchener Waterloo Opera will present Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart’s powerful operatic masterpiece Don Gl’ovontzi at the Centre in the Square Saturday, November 1, 1997. Deemed “the greatest opera ever written” by no less an authority than George Bernard Shaw, Don Ciovmni achieves a rare balance between stark drama and slapstick humor. With a profound understanding of human nature, Mozart’s glorious score captures vivid musical characterizations matched to Da Ponte’s brilliantly composed dialogue. Don Giozxznni will be presented in its traditional 18” century setting featuring lavish scenery and costumes. The orchestra for the 1997/1998 season will be provided altcrnatcly by the Kitchener-Waterloo symphony orchestra and the New Hamilton Orchestra. I Jnder the baton of Artistic Director Drlniel Lipton, the Kitchencr-Waterloo Symphony Orchestra will be up first, playing for the run of Don Giovanni.

Don G’Ax?~nni has attracted the attention of many 20th century writers, poets, and critics. First performed in Prague on October 29, 1787, the story follows the sexual exploirs of its central character, the Iicentious yet charismatic Don Giovanni. Blazing a trail of seductions, desertions, and murders, he loves them then leaves them in the cruelest fashion. Always barely escaping the consequences ofhis debaucheries, he moves on to the next Pursued by his many prey. scorned and avenging victims, it is a stone statue come-to-life that delivers the final judgement. In one of the most dramatic scenes in all opera, the stone guest demands Don Giovanni’s repentance and the unbending Don, defiant to the end, is dragged kicking and screaming into hell. It-is a powerful and terrifying ending to an opera Mozart entered into his own private catalogue as an opera buffa, or comic opera but is now listed as a humourous drama. Directing this production will be Ken Cazan, returning afer directing last season’s opener, Up2 ball0 in m&s&era. Considered to be one of North America’s most innovative directors, his creden-

tials encompass opera, musicals, and theatre. In North America, he has directed operas for Santa Fe Opera, Seattle Opera, and Atlanta Opera, just to name a few. The cast consists of worldrenowned baritone Jason Howard playing Don Giovanni. Kitchener-Waterloo audiences will remember him from Carmen last season, where he played the dashing Toreador, Escamillo. Desmond Byrne will be playing his side-kick Leporello. He is making his Kitchener-Waterloo area debut. Joanne Kolomyjec plays the scorned Donna Anna, and is renowned for heroutstanding vocal artistry. Canadian tenor Benjamin Butterfield plays the role of Don Ottavio. Sally Dibblce brings her expressive voice to the show, playing the role of the peasant bride. In the role of Donna Elvira is soprano Eva Zseller. Her most recent credits include The Metropolitan Opera and the Cincinatti Opera. This show is being presented at the Centre in the Square, and tickets are selling fast to this opener. Limited seating is available, so call for ticket information at (S 19) S78- 1,570, or l-800-2658977.

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Imprint

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t times, IIZe /Ot&2-~ IQ& seems to be a cleverlywritten satire. A sly condemnation of all things Generation X. No person can be such a cliche; the confused actor, William, living in New York, sleeps with a number of women until he finds “THE ONE.” William and Sarah have a few glorious weeks together until she drops him for no substantive reason except that, emotionally, she’s not into it. William is distraught and makes small attempts at rcconciliation with his father and maybe learns a bit about himself. The story could read as a wakcup call for all self-absorbed slackers who choose to perceive everyone and everything around them negatively and eventually suffer for it. William’s definingcharacteristic is his self-absorption; and it is eventually his undoing, romantically. He is so wrapped up in his need for Sarah that he is blind to what she needs out of the relationship. Sarah is educated both academically and romantically and doesn’t want to rely on a boyfriend for her life and identity

ever again. Part of William’s need is to have her need him, but he professes to love her because she doesn’t love him, unlike all the others. It could only end badly. Toparaphraseoneof William’s remarks, he says he acts well because pretending to be someone else is what he does best. This is what leaves the love/loss plot ultimately unsatisfying. It is hard to believe that William loved Sarah to begin with. Sure, he spoke strong words about her and acted out when things didn’t go his way, but that isn’t proof

enough to hang the whole story on. Talking about her body and clothes as being different and therefore better than those of the other million women he has slept with doesn’t make it genuine. While most ofThe~~@&S&& is written in a fairly comfortable first person voice, it ends up sounding fake, as though Hawke doesn’t remember when he was

30 minutes 60 minutes 75 minutes

21 and he is writing the story the way his character inRer;r&&~~sor

Dead Poets’ Society would. William is full of overblown emotional responses to common problems. Confronted with standard life problems like mild disagreements with Sarah, William tells her to “fuck off.” While apologizing to her in a bar, he smashes a chair. Through the course of the novel, William also destroys three phones, overturns Sarah’s refrigerator, rips the doors off his kitchen cupboards and smashes his fists and head against various hard surfaces. The novel ends up suffering from its own earnestness. It is too hard to pity William because he is too selfish and prone to doing Romeo’s balcony speech under windows and saying things like, “There’s something about New York City that made me feel like a Texan and something about Sarah that made me feel like a man.” William can’t be a satirical figure either because Hawke wants us so much to feel his pain, to identify with him, to somehow approve of William’s ridiculous behaviour.Finally, the slacker response to T/re Hottest Stare would be something like, “It just smacks of effort.” It is a love story that is intriguing enough, but too’many stabs at being deep and profound leave the story sounding a bit phony. /’

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“If you want more beats for your buck there’s no luck,” the first line of the first song, and first single, “Transistor” aptly describes this album. With 21 rap and bass filled tracks totaling well over an hour of music, 3 11 ‘s fourth fuI1 release certainly does not disappoint in terms of length. For those who didn’t hear their last album, 311 combines hard bass lines with rap and reggae beats and vocal stylings to create many interesting and varied songs. They range from the easy, somewhat smooth and melodic second single “Prisoner,” to the hard rap lyrics and heavy bass of

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The debut album from The Vents opens with a burst of highenergy guitar riffagc that quickly sets the tone for the rest of the record. Proudly paying homage to their power-pop forefathers, the four Brics recaI1 both the meticulous songcraft of The Who and the Beatles, while at the same time radiating the reckless energy of the Replacements and

by Leah McQuire special to Imprint Since

1991’s

stellar

release has been concentrating more on actingthenonsinging. Icshows.With the exception of a song on the Po~~~on~-assoundtrack, she hasn’t recorded anything worth mentioning. We’ve all heard this story before: skilful crooner does the same sound over and over again, only not as good as they did it before. Can you say Michael Bolton? Thankfully that isn’t the story here. The faster tracks are the best; unfortunately only two of the al-

The Comfut7 Zone, Williams

“Galaxy” and, most interestingly of all, these two songs are back to back. This diversity is both a blessing and a curse. The band’s sense of integration of the diverse to showcase our similarities is very positive and is reinforced by the lyrics. As Nick Hexum, the lead singer of the band puts it: “The concept behind Trans~s~uris very positive-it’s about how all humans are connected.” As for the

the fusion and the changes of pace are enjoyable, it is not for everyone. At least one song on this album is a guaranteed hit, hur then about SO per cent could be easily hated, and the rest not bothered with. For the open minded who enjoy a wide range of genres, especially those mentioned above, this album deserves a listen. Otherwise, it may not be a ~oocl in-

Material Issue. Fast, catchy tunes simply tear out of the speakers in a fun, thrashy manner that never quite crosses the line into kitschy or retro. Head Vent Devin Powers played every instrument on the album (excepting drums), as well as producing the record. The rest of the band was recruited to make things work on stage. The result is a remarkably focused album that still sounds like it could have been cut live in the studio. “Venus Again” starts out with several cuts of mainly uptempo, fuzzed-out rock, bur by the second half displays some acoustic texture and more variety. Pow-

ers’ vocals do take some getting used to, but fans of Paul Westerberg’s rasp will find it comfortingly familiar. &hers might: find it to be the bastard offspring of Joe Strummer and Billie Joe Armstrong. The album art does a good job of conveying the spirit of the contents within. Bright, bold slashes of colour, more than a few shots of the band’s groovy Danelecrro guitar collection, and a Flying V hanging at the ankles. These guys have fun playing the music, and it translates. Recommended for anyone who’s worn out more than a few T-Rex albums.

bum’s twelve tracks are fast. When you buy this CD you’ll quickly notice that about four of the songs are standard slow ballads that all sound pretty much the same. Fortunately the rest of the album shines. The first two songs on the album are the best. “Who were you thinking ‘bout” is an interesting dance song with an edge (there’s an eclectic use of guitars and lap steel here). A song about independence, “Happiness” is a surprisingly funky, fun jam. Bound to be a wedding favorite is the sweet ballad, “Lost without you.” There’s nothing here that’s too ground-breaking in the lyrical department but with Williams’ voice, who cares? The sultry *‘And my heart goes” and the beautifully sung “First thing on your mind” are perfect slow-dance sonf5.

Mostofthe album brims with big, fat, juicy beats that make you want to shake it. These beats underscore “Surrender,” a sexy Iittie song about passion. The CD ends on a bright note with the touching poignant “Oh how the years go by.” Ultimately, Williams’ voice and the album’s melodies pull you in and make you glad that this CD was h%xf.

IMPRINT,

Friday,

by Klaus Imprint

September

&eden staff

It’s been a fairly long time since the Pet Shop Boys excited me with new material. And you know what? It will likely be even longer. Having very clearly defined their sound in the mid-eighties, they haven’t really broken much new musical ground. Granted, they’ve decided to veer off in the general direction of the kind of

by David Eby special to Imprint One afternoon I passed my brother in the living room of our house. On the stereo was the song “Zombie” by the Cranberries. When I came back downstairs the song was still on the radio. My brother had set it to endless repeat. The new Chumbawamba CD is one for my brother.

by Debbra McClintock Imprint staff Like an artist exhibiting her most private works, Julie’s sensitive and fragile songs are carefully played out in a timid, soft approach. Sprinkled with piano, the album features her voice accompanied by simple guitar chords. The lyrics are choppy, at times sacrificing rhyme and rhythm for the basic essence of a story that must be told. Likewise, her voice is exposed and pure, sometimes cracking and wavering in volume. Few artists will record with such a live sound. Julie’s voice lays over the music so clearly that she can be pictured sitting on a stool, hovering over the mic, eyes closed and haphazardly strumming her guitar. It’s a mellow rawness that few artists can pull off well. The simplicity of her sound matches the content of the lyrics, mainly about her son and being a mother. At times Ianekest in & m0mingcomes across sappy, a feature not easily forgivable in the eyes of a harsh critic. For those that don’t recognize her name, Doiron was the lead singer of the now defunct Eric’s Trip. She branched off to the solo project Broken Girl, and has now released Con&& in fhe momingunder her own name. For those fans of her previous work, this album is a musthave for your collection. -

‘+

.e,L.b,

ARTS

26, 1997

techno you hear in gay bars, but that’s hardly new musical territory* If you’ve heard anything they’ve recorded in the nineties, like D&o 2 or Veq, MiflgtiQl will sound rathersimilar. Over the past few years, Tennant and Lowe have failed to attain the greatness of their material, songs like “Op” “What Have I Done portunity, to DeserveThis?” and “West End Girls,” Sure, it’s excellent song writing, wry lyrics and a decent dance beat.. .but for them, and us as fans, it’s pretty much all old hat. The only genuinely interesting thing on this al bum were some

This album has 12 songs, one bright spot eclipsed by 11 other tracks that drag Chumbawamba, kicking and screaming, into the world of one-hit-wonder bands. lead single The “Tubthumping,” destined to become a hit on CFNY and at all “Alternative Nights” in Canadian bars, combines loud guiIars and shouting reminiscent of the old’ Pop Will Eat Itself, before Trent Reznor got his claws into them. This formula has worked for countless other bands, and it works again here. It’s not inventive, it’s just fun. However, the remainder of the album is terrible. The whole thing sounds like a sprite commercial. Blatantly overproduced, a pathetic attempt to sound like a real band. Weak techno beats and cheesy lyrics followed by lame hooks all conspire to force any listener’s hand to the skip button again and again. What can be said about such an album? Not much. File it next to Whale (remember “Hobo Humping Slobo Babel”) in your CD collection and forget about it.

of the titles of the remixes. Like “A Red Letter Day (Trouser autoerotic decapitation mix)” and “Discoteca (Trouser Enthusiasts adventure beyond the stellar empire mix).” Which reminds me. The review copy was the special edition, a double CD with the aforementioned oddly-titled remixes on the second bonus disk. If you’re a fan, you’ll probably want to add rhis one to your collection; i c’s not ground breaking by any means, but double CD bonus albums are always a neat collectors’ item. If you can only find it as the regular edition, you’re better off saving your money.

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The Ret Pals Program is currently looking for volunteers for wheelchair hockey on Saturdays at 2:30 p.m. at the small gym of the PAC. For more infd. call Charina at 746-4039. Friday, September 26,1997 The City of Waterloo Volunteer Services (8U-6356) is currently recruiting for the following volunteer positions: Hopesprin - Cancer Su port Centre - ‘Complementary Therapies’ will be the Older Adult Drama Festival Production Volunteers: are needed to assist in the production of a Show to showcase Older topic by Dr. P rancesco Anel Po HPSc (Genetics) MD, CCFPat 7:30 p.m, at Hopespring, Adult Performing Arts. Positions available include Artistic Coordinator, Stage Mana er, Choreographer, Technical Coordinator and more. Experience an asset. Must be willing to participate in the developmen s of an Older Performing Arts not-for-profit 167 King Street, South, Waterloo. (comer of King and William St.) No admission IS company. charged but space is limited. Call 742-4673 to register. For info call Bet& Recchia Wonders of Winter Volunteers: are needed to assist at the Christmas Ii ht festival at Waterloo Park. Positions available at the same number. include: Chair of the Volunteer Committe, Secretary, and Advertising. Cal Pfor other poisitions. Museum of Civilization’ A discussion on the creation of man. Come join us at MC Commitee Member: ar8 needed for the S.A.L.T. committee which is a crime prevention program. Tasks involved may include 2034 at 7 p.m. FREE refreshments. Hosted by Chinese Christian Fellowship. For info helping with presentations and making phone calls to book presentation. Must have good communication skills. contact 884-5897. Telephone Security: one regular and one spare telephone caller are needed to phone isolated seniors. A 2.5 hour per week Wednesdav. October 1rst. 1997 commitment is required. Interdisciplinary Forum presents “A Secret History of the Liquid Body” by Doug Program Volunt&rs: are needed to assist with a senior day away program. Volunteers are needed Tuesday to Friday Mann. Come out Wednesday at 5:30pm to ES1 n-n 221 for the next installment of our afternoons. monthly colloquium series. Details http://www.ece.uwaterfoo.ca/-jgwilkin/if learn about a different culture while ou show a new immi rant how to’be a part of your community. For more info on this volunteer position call K-W Y.M.C.A. x ost Program at 579-9 8 22. Gay and Lesbian Liberation of Waterloo Coming Out Discussion Group. Topic: “Gaydar’.’ 7130 p.m, Social follows at 9 p.m. PAS 3005. Meet old friends_-and makeVolunteer tutors are needed to tutor students on a one-to-one basis in written and oral English. Tutors meet students on campus, -..__.._._ usually once a week for l-2 hours for 1 term. If you have a good workin knowied e of Engbsh, are patient, friendly, de endable new ones. All w&come. Details: 884-4569. and would like to volunteer, register at the International Student Office, %I H 2080%or more info about the program, cat Pext. 2814 Friday, October 3,1997 or e-mail darlene @ watservl . Homework helpers needed immediately! Big Sisters requires 15 homework helpers to tutor elementary or hi h school students ’ Videos and Filmswill be shown by the Department of Germanic & Slavic Languages & Literatures. “The Architecture of Doom’. Come to ML 117 at 6:30 p.m. For info call who need academic assistance. Own transportation is required. Training is scheduled for Monday, Sept. 29/9 9 from 7-9:OO p.m. Please tail now to register at 743-5206 and help a child. 888-4567, ext. 2260. Big Sisters requires female volunteers (20 ears and older) to make a positive difference in a child’s life. Next training sessions commence Sept. 23/97 or Nov. 8/97. Call 1 43-5206 for info/register. Leisure Support Services re uires volunteers for exciting new track and field team for athletes with disabilities. One evening/ week for 8 weeks. Call 741-22 9 8. Waterloo Girl Guides wants energetic, enthusiastic oun women to be leaders for all ages (5-14 years), within the university vicinitv. No exoerience needed! For info call Ann a? J 46-2 9;62. Volunteers are needed to tutor students at a secondary school in Baden. This is an ideal experience for anyone wishing to get If you don’t hear us on the radio .. . hear inlo Teacher‘s College. Call Bill Bond at 634-5441 between 8100 am - 4:OOpm WEDNESDAYS us at www.eyerhyme.com. New proVolunteer for community, health and conservation pro ects in Costa Rica and Guyana. Must be 18-25yrs. Deadline is Come to Grace Christian Fellowship for OcL3rd. Call Youth Challenge International (416) 971-984 6 x300, email info@yci.org. an at cost supper, singing & Bible study, gressive rock! Aquatic volunteers are needed to assist adults and children with disabilities. Will adapt to your schedule. Receive free pool pass. Rooms in the Village Residence are 4130 p.m., McKirdy Hall, St. Paul’s ColWaterloo Swimplex, Breithaupt Centre and Lyle Hallman Pool. call Deb 741- 2226. available for immediate occupancy. Inlege. Call Tim Uyt 883-0435 Volunteers sought to assist individuals with a disabili at recreation programs. Be a Leisure Support Volunteer. Great for course quire at the Housing Office, Village f or requirements or lob experience. Call Deb at 741-222 vi THURSDAYS phone 888-4567, ext. 3704 or ext. 3705 Assist a 4 year old boy with a disability to participate in a craft and playtime program. Saturday morning 10:00 am - noon. Strld8 its Advising Co-opweekty meetfor further info on the villages. Training and support provided. Call Deb at 741-2226. inys arse at 5:30 in Needles Hall, room Gain Valuabl8 work experience. Explore leisure activities with group of adults with developmental disabilites. Friday nights 7Guided self-change of alcohol use: for 1Opm Call 741-2228 individuals who may have concerns Inner City Neighbourhood Association needs volunteers to distribute, collect and analyse 60 surveys for space inventory, about the amount they are drinking and assist with Dro in Program for pre-schoolers/parents/caregivers, and to assist with drop in sports programs for teens. Call Mary want to cut down. Call Counseflina ServAnn, 744-261 P . ices, ext. 2655 to find out more.Prueter Public School (Union-Lancaster area) needs volunteers to work in classrooms or with individual students. Call Jane Recent processing changes manBoy Scou& of Canada needs you! .Leader and volunteers are required to help run our weekly events. if you enjoyed the Scouting dated by the Ministry of Education and movement, please call Sonia at 885-4744 and help our young kids! Training have created a severe backlog Th8 Oktoberfest Pr8vlew Committee needs ei ht volunteers for face ainting on tit. 4. Three shifts to choose from. Volunteers in the workload of the Student Awards receive a complimentary pass to a festhall. Cal ? Sandi Benton 578-7 % 0. Office. In order to deliver financial aid Biq Brothers of Kitchener-Waterloo needs volunteers for one-to-one matching or group activities. Call us today at 579-5150. programs to students accurately and on Lexinaton Public School is Iookina for volunteers to help in classrooms and to work with individual students. Please CaH Brirritta time, the offiie will be closed on the following Wednesdays: Sept 24, Oct. 1, Female volunteers needed to heip a blind athlete train at a ym. No experience needed, just enthusiasm! A helpful “Sighted Ott 8, Oct. 15. Guide’ training session will be provided. Please call Vivian 7%5-9345.

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FAMILY

RESTAURANTS

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Applications

for the following scholarships are berng accepted during the Fall term. Refer to Section 4 of the Undergraduate Calendar for further criteria. Application forms are available in the Student Awards Office, 2nd ftoor, Needles Halt.

All Faculties: Doreen Brisbin Award - interested females entering 4th year in Spring or Fall 1998 in an Honours program in which women are currently under-represented. Deadline: APR 30/98 C.U.P.E. Local 793 Award - available to Union employees, their spouse, children or grandchildren for extra-curricular/community involvement. Deadline: SEPT 30/97 Don Hayes Award -for involvement& contribution to athletics and/or sports therapy. Deadline: JAN 30198

Leeds-Waterloo Student Exchange Program Award - students to contact John Medley, Mechanical

Engineering.

Mike Moser Memorial

Award - available to 3rd or 4th year based on extracurricular and financial need. Deadline: JAN 9/98 NCR Waterloo Award - based on financial need, leadership and extracurricular activities; must have minimum B+ average. Deadline: SEPT 30/97

University of Waterloo Staff Association Award * available to full or part-time undergraduates in a degree program, Applicants must be current Staff Association members, their spouses, children, grandchildren or dependents. Based on academics, extracurricular involvement and financial need. Deadline: SEPT 30/97 Dougfas T. Wright Award - available to all who have participate in a UW international work placement. Students to apply upon return to full-time study at UW. Deadline: OCT 15/97

Faculty

of Applied

Ross and Doris

Health

Sciences:

Dixon Award

- available to all 2nd, 3rd or 4th year for financial need and academic achievement. Deadline: OCT 10197 Mark Forster Memorial Award -available to 3rd or 4th year Kinesiology. Deadline: JAN 30/98 Andrea Fraser Memorial Award - available to 3rd or 4th year Kinesiology. Deadline: OCT lo/97 Michael Gellner Memorial Scholarship - available to 3B Kinesiology or Health Studies. Deadline: MAR 31/98 Robert Haworth Scholarship - completion of 3rd year in an honours program in resource management related to Park Planning and Management, Recreation, Natural Heritage or Outdoor Recreation. Deadline: MAY 28/98 Kate Kenny Memorial Award -available to 3rd or 4th year Kinesiology with an interest in rehabilitative medicine. Deadline: OCT 31/97 Warren Lavery Memorial Award - available to 3rd or 4th year Recreation. Deadline: Ott 10197 RAWCO - available to 2nd, 3rd, or 4th year Recreation and Leisure Studies. Deadline: JAN 30/98 Marion J. Todd Memorial Award - available to 3E3 Co-op Health Studies with interest in health-related research. Minimum 75% average required. Deadline: OCT 31197

Faculty

of Arts:

Arts Student

Union Award - available to all Arts students. Deadline: OCT 31197 Robin K. BankslPacioli Award - available to 2A Accountancy Studies (Arts only). Deadline: OCT 15197 Concordia Club Award - available to 3rd year Regular or 3A Co-op Germanic & Slavic. Deadline: JAN 31/98 Quintext Co-op English Award - available to 4A Enalish. Deadline: SEPT 30/97

Faculty Jonathan

Weekend Brunch! f:\ only $7.9

of Engineering:

Ainely Memorial

Bursary - available to 2A Civil for financial need. Deadline: SEPT 30/97 Andersen Consulting Scholarship - available to 38. Deadline: MAR 31/98 J.P. Bickell Foundation Bursaries - available to all Chemical students. Deadline: OCT 10197 Canadian Postureand Seating Centre Scholarship - available to all. Deadline: OCT IO/97 Consulting

Engineers

of Ontario

Scholarship

Saturday and Sunday from 9 a.m. to 2 p.m. includes bacon, sausage, eggs, lasagna, homefries, cakes, waffles, frenchtoast, croissants, danish, salads, fruit, bagel and more ..._

available to all 38. Deadline: MAR 31/98 Deere Limited Scholarship - available to 3B Mechanical. MAR 31/98 Delcan Scholarship - available to 4A/B Civil. Deadfine: FEB 28198 Randy Duxbury Memorial Award - available to 36 Chemical. Deadline: MAR 31198

Buy one Weekend Brunch at $7.99 and get one FREE I

John

SC. Johnson & Son Ltd. Environmental Scholarship - available to 3rdyear Environmental Chemical. Deadline: MAY 28/98

OPE Foundation

Undergraduate

Scholarship

EXPIRES: Oct. 5, 1997. Valid Sat. & Sun. 9 a.m. to 2 p.m. Not valid with other promotions - Waterloo location only mm-mmmmmmmmmm-mmmmmm FREE children toys - 10% Senior discount wheelchair accessible - ample free parking 190 Weber Street (beside White Rose), WATERLOO, 886-2572 LLBO - OPEN 7 DAYS 7 a.m. to 10 p.m. @&

Faculty

of Environmental

Studies:

Shelley Ellison Memorial Award - available to 3rd year Planning. Deadline: NOV 28/97 John Geddes Memorial Award - available to ERS, Geography and Planning. Deadline: OCT31/ 97 Robert Haworth Scholarship - available to 3B Park Planning and fVhnag8ment, Recreation, Natural Heritage & Planning, Outdoor Education. Deadline: MAY 30/98 I.O.D.E.- Applied Ecology Award - available to all fourth year. Deadline: SEPT 30/97 Marcel Pequegnat Scholarship - available to 3rd year Environment & Resource Studies, Planning, water Resource Mgt. Deadline: MAY 31/97 -

Faculty Andersen

of Mathematics:

Consulting

Scholarship

- available to

38. Deadline: MAR 31/98

Bell Sygma Computer Science Award - available to4th year Computer Science. Deadline: OCT 31/97 Certified

Management

Accounting

Bursary

available to full-time students in Mathematics Business Administration/Chartered Accountancy/ Management Accountancy. Preference will be given to students who attended high school in counties of Perth, Waterloo or Wellington. Deadline: SEPT 301 97

Electrohome

75th Anniversary Scholarship Science. Deadline: NOV

available to 3B Computer 28/97

Sun Life of Canada Award - available to 2nd year Actuarial

Science. Deadline: NOV 28/97

Faculty David M. Forget

of Science: Memorial

Award in Geology

available to 2A Earth Science, see department

S.C. Johnson & Son Ltd. Environmenta! Scholarship - available to 3rd year Chemistry. Deadline: MAY 30/98

Marcel Pequegnat Earth Science/Water 30/98

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Dreaming

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Homecooking? Want to go Home for Thanksgiving?

Why not take the Fed BUS to Ottawa for the Thanksgiving

Weekend? $65 for Feds & $80 Non-Fed

Scholarship

- available to 3B Resource Mgt. Deadline: MAY

oat

es -

Kimberly Ont., is presently searching for new J coaches, for J2 and JA/B tevel, as well as MacKenzie level coaches. The successful candidates will have achieved a minimum level II CSCF and their level 11CSIA. Experience at J level coaching is requiredaswell asgoodorganizational presentation skills. Beaver Valley Ski Club offers a competitive renumeration program. Pleas8 fax or mail your resume to Jim Younker, General Manager, Beaver Valley Ski Club, R.R. 4, Markdale, Ontario NOC 1HO. Phone (519) 986-2520 ; Fax (519) 986-4168.

Mom’s

to hire graduate honours, master and phd students to tutor large groups of students in introductory math, science and economiccourses. Call l-888644-3888. $2OO/day

Nightclub in downtown Kitchener. Bus trips, special events and birthday parties every Saturday. We offer recession prices, FREE concerts, Free VtP lounge, FREEfood, FREEprizesandfreeaccess to Metropolis Night Club, located across the street. You, your organization or choice of charity can make lots of cash! Call 749-2121 -ask for the Manager and we will help you orqanize your event.

available to all 28 & 36 based on extracurricular and marks. Deadline: NOV 28/97 Marcel Pequegnat Scholarship - available to 36 Civil, waterresource management students. Deadline: MAY 28/98 Standard Products (Canada) Ltd. Award - available to 1 B or above in Mechanical or Chemical if home address is in County or Municipality of Perth, Huron, or Halton. Deadline: SEPT 30/97 Jack Wiseman Award- available to 3B or4ACivil. Deadline: OCT 31/97

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