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Feds restructure.

again

Organizational shake-up to put Federation back in black by Natalie Imprint

Gillis staff

n keeping with the spirit of change that has gripped the Federation of Students this year, the Feds recently announced the restructuring of several management positions within their business oprations. Foremost among the changes is the termination of the General Manager (GM)position, currently held by Bob Sproule. Responsible for developing strategies for the Feds businesses, the GM position had been with the Feds since 1985. Sproule has held the job for five years. 2 Says Feds Vice President Administration and Finance Raju Patel, Sproule had been considering the necessity of his position since the Feds closed the Campus Shop last year. The opening of Ground Zerd seemed to justify its continued existence, but, says Patel, “Now, with Fed Copy Plus closing down, he doesn’t think there is enough work to justify having a General Manager.” “The Feds closed a clothing store; this year it’s closing its copy cencre. Both the businesses and the scope of the businesses the Feds are involved in are reducing significantly,” explains Sproule. He notes that this year the Feds hired a third full-time accounting staff and added an Executive Researcher to their staff. With all these employees, explains Sproule, a General Manager is not really necessary to help administer the affairs of the organization. Starting in early May, the GM’s duties will be divided between the Executive Researcher and the head accountant, now called the Business Manager. “This reshuffling and elimination of one position shouldn’t have that significant of an impact on the ability of the organization to administer its affairs,” explains Sproule, “but it will save them a substantial amount of money.” The Feds will save $40,000 per year as a result of the change, says Patel. Combined with the recently eliminated Bombshelter Manager position, this means the Feds will have saved $80,000 in expenses before the next fiscal year even begins. As the Feds currentIy expect to lose up to $70,000 this year, these savings alone will bring the Federation of Students’ operations back out of the red. Next term will also see the elimination of the Board of Entertainment (BEnt) Director of Programming and the Fed Hall Manager positions. Along with the former Bombshelter Manager position, these posts will be combined into a single Bar Operations Manager. The duties of the current Food Operations Manager have also been redesigned slightly so that together, these two managers will oversee business at all three Feds food and liquor

operations - Fed Hall, the Bombshelter and Ground Zero. Each business will continue to have its own Assistant Manager. With the elimination of the GM, Bomber Manager, Fed Hall Manager and Director of Programming, and creation of the Bar Operations Manager, the Federation of Students expect savings of $120,000 next year. This means that, even if Fed businesses maintain their current levels of activity, the organization will make money next year. Pate1 points out that business at Ground Zero is continuing to grow, and the $100,000 loss it is will have incurred by the end of this year will not be repeated next year. The Federation of Students have been considering combining BEnt with Fed Hall management for some time, says Patel. The recent resignation of Bombshelter manager Larry Vaughn provided the Feds with the opportunity to change the management structure of their student bars. Changes will take effect at in May, after the current Director of Programming’s contract has expired. “What they [other executives] haven’t done in ten years, we had to do this year,” says Pate1 of the restructuring. He explains that over the past several years, no serious changes were made to prevent large losses the organization has taken. The Feds have been drawing on their reserve funds to make up for the lack of business revenue. They currently have $22,000 in reserve to help with this year’s projected $70,000 loss. “If we don’t make these changes, there won’t be a Feds in five years,” explains Patel. These changes should allow the Feds to maintain their current level of activity, yet allow for growth. Unti! recently, the Federation of Students employed a manager and assistant manager to operate each bar, and concerts at both venues were booked separately by a Director of Programming. The new Bar Operations Manager will oversee both the operation of Federation bars and book concerts. This should allow for more effective and efficient co-ordination of functions between the bars, explains Sproule. Pate1 admits that bar management and programming are essentially two different departments, but explains that other universities have been known to successfully combine the two into a single job . He cites Dalhousie University as an example. Though the Feds are currently looking for a new Bombshelter Assistant Manager, it is unsure as yet whether the assistant position at Fed Hall wit1 be open. This will depend on whether current Fed Hall manager Hayden Belgrave decides to stay on, or to apply for any the new Bar Operations Manager position. Pate1 says the Feds hope to have the new positions filled in time for the beginning of the new term, “if it’s

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feasible. I’m not going to rush into anything.” The management changes will result in some ace counting differences within the businesses that may affect the level of profit each business generates. Financial activities regarding Ground Zero, the Bombshelter and Fed Hall will be grouped and reflected in two departments (Food Operations and Bar Operations) instead of as separate entities. “It is conceivable that the actual venues may lose their identities and the results will be combined,” admits Sproule, adding that final decisions have not yet been made as to how profits within the Food Operations and Bar Operation departments will be articulated. This accounting change could effect the profits seen at Fed Hall, which is making money this year due targely to its banqueting services. However, since January, all banquet revenue generated by Fed Hall is recorded not under Fed Hall but under the Food Operations department. The bar will seem to generate less money, even if no reduction’ in activity levels has occurred. Sproule notes that, “The financial system has the ability to provide data on a more detailed basis than just by department only,” but to what degree this will be done remains undecided.

In Print News -

page 3

Engineers take first prize. . -again

Forum -

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I’ve been hearing Voices!

Science -

page 11

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NEWS

IMPRINT,

Friday,

March

13, 1998

UW Engineers take on the nation UW brings home eight awards fkom the Canadian Engineering Competition L

design &erall. “It must be * stressed that this is the superduper award,” said Doug Seurich,

by Ryan Chen-Wing Imprint staff

aterloo achieved a de& nite victory last weekend at the Convention Centre in Ottawa where Carleton University hosted the Canadian Engineering Competition 1998 (CEC 1998). The Waterloo teams chomped down and took a lion’s share of honours and then returned home with eight of the twenty-one awards. Tyler Close won the ancilIary W.R. Petrie Award for best

Cameron designed an “Ergonomic Gynecological Leg Support System,” and a week after

must be stressed that this is the super-duper award.” “It

a UW competitor category. Kate Hoye

in the debate and

Diane

winning first place at the Ontario Engineering Competition 1998, they replicated their success and

took

first prize in CEC 1998. “We’re going to change the world of gynecology,” said Cameron. Though she was joking, she was likely not far from the truth. “We’ll probably try to get a patent,” Kate Hoye replied when asked what the next step with their invention would be. Parker Mitchell took first in Editorial Communications with his talk “The Silence of the Lamb: How Dolly Changed Genetic Engineering.” Tanya Sulky took third place with “Foo’d Irradiation.”

Is the public interested?

Sir Sandfbrd Fleming College More and more students are preparing for career success by adding ‘a college diploma to their existing university studies. Here’s a few of the Fieming College programs that can he/p open up your career opportunities: CAREER AND WORK COUNSELLOR Four semesters Sutherland Campus, Feterborougb Instead of having ajob for life, many of us will experience as many as six different careers. As a result, there’s a growing demand for qualified career and work counseltors who can help individuals identify the right career opportunities for them. With credit available for your existing studies, you may be eligible for advanced standing. Call Program Coordinator Bitt O’Byrne for program details, at (705) 749-5530, ext. 1472.

@EOGRAPfllCAL INfORMAtION SYSTEMS Two semesters , School of Na turai Resources, lindsa y Using a variety of electronic tools, GIS specialists collect, store, manipulate, analyse, interpret and communicate geographic information within a variety of disciplines. Demand for these specialists is growing rapidly. This renowned program features internship and external projects with leading companies.

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WPIRG forum will find out

T-NT/FLEMING I~INT NURSING PROG+?AM Peterborough Students will graduate from this fouryear program with a Special Emphasis Degree from Trent University and a Nursing Diploma from Fleming College. The program emphasizes health promotion and.community-focused care. For details, please contact Monica Sheridan, Program Coordinator, at (705) 749-5530, ext. 1480 or e-mail msherida@flemingc.on.ca

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Mitchell also came third in Explanatory Communications with his talk on land mines. He was awarded The Social Awareness Award for the combination of both his entries. For Corporate Design, the crane project team made up of Paul Bowles, Sheridan Ethier, Dan O’Connell and John O’Reilly traded in their third place finish at last week’s Ontario Engineering Competition into a first place finish at the national contest. Extemporaneous Debate saw Alex Pak and Doug Seurich come in third.

by Tara Markides special to Imprint

tudents interested in the UW’s impact on the community and current events of which the public should be aware of will be interested in the upcoming forum on “UW and the Public Interest.” Organized by the. Waterloo Public Interest Research Group (WPIRG), the forum will take place on Saturday, March 14 from 1:OO to 4100 p.m. in Math and Computers room 4045. Forum organizers hope to enlighten the community on what “Public Interest” is, and what the issues are. During the first hour, a fourmember panel will discuss the meaning of “public interest.” The three topics which will be explored during the second hour are the ethical concerns of biotechnology, the impact of information technology on the public and intellectual property rights. The third hour will consist of an open discussion, at which time

the audience may become involved. Since public interest does not affect only one part of the university, representatives from a variety of departments will be in actendance. Speakers will be from as disparate backgrounds as mechanical engineering (Roydon Fraser) and women’s studies (Vera Galen). The objectives of this forum arc to explore and discuss the public interest in regards to different departments, and to form a partnership with academics in order to find out what are the current issues of public interest in their various fields. The forum aims to crcatc opportunities for. discussion and reflection upon those issues which WPIRG iscurrently aware of. Do you have questions about the public’s right to know? Come to the University of WaterIoo’s Public Interest forum. No signup is necessary, there is no cost, and refreshments will be provided.

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NEWS

Friday, March 13, 1998

Tuition cut at U of W Windsor offers U.S. students a price break by Carrie special

St. Jerome’s,then and now Top: St. Jerome’s College as it stood in 1864. The original college was built in the nearby town of St. Agatha. 2

Bottom: St. Jerome’s today. One of UW’s four “affiliated colleges,” the institution officially changed its name on March 4 from the University of St.Jerome’s College to simply, the University of St. Jerome’s.

Lindeboom to Imprint

he University of Windsor (U of W) is offering a price break to US. Stuwho choose to attend their

dents school. U of W sent out recruitment letters to students in Michigan, Ohio and Indiana informing them of a recently implemented tuition cut to U.S. students under the North American Free Trade Agreement (NAFTA). The rate offered is $5000 Canadian, which is approximately $3500 U.S. Visa students cypitally pay twice this amount. “We want to be competitive among both Canadian and American universities,” said John Carrington, Managing Edi tar of U of W’s News Service. “We can provide people with a high quality education at a competitive price because of the exchange rate of the American dollar.” In the U.S., students typically pay about $8314 (Canadian) at schools such as the University of Michigan. Thus, the price

break will provide U.S. students with subsEantia1 savings. Because of the exchange rate, U.S. stud&t-scan also save money on room and board, compared to what they would pay at American universities. Jeff Gardner, UW’s Federation of Students Vice President, Education, said that the break is “frustrating.” While he acknowledges that Windsor is situated at an international location he fears the break will come at the expense of quality. “1 just hope that the money the U.S. students will save will not come at the expense of Canadians,” said Gardner. “Universities in thi’s country are subsidized by Canadian tax payers.” Carrington, on the other

hand, said that having more U.S. students at the University will be good for Canadians. “U.S. scudents will help us maintain the number of programs we offer,” 9 Because of funding cuts and ’ tuition hikes, the University of Windsor has found that over the past few years, central universities (such as those located in Toronto), have opened up to first year students and taken away from ‘those who would choose to go to universities in Northern Ontario. These factors have caused a decline in enrolment. U of W does not expect a large influx of U.S. students this fall, but Carrington hopes that more international students will consider their school over the next few years.

B.C. freezes tuition Students get a break for third year running by Adam Imprint

Natran staff

’

n Thursday, March 5, B.C. Premier Glen Clark announced that he is freezing tuition fees in the province for the third year in a row. The Premier also urged Ottawa to make fundingavailable so that colleges and universities across Canada could put an end to tuition hikes. A government source said char B.C. is concerned that if the gap in the cost of higher education between provinces becomes too great, students will be. attracted to the lower-cost institutions. According to recent statistics, B.C. enjoys the second lowest tuition rates across the country. The average cost for two terms of schoo1 is $1,970. At rhe bottom of the scale is Quebec with tuition at $1,670. The most expensive schools to attend are in Nova Scotia; the

cost there is approximately $3,750 for two tefms. Students at the University of British Columbia (UPC) are pleased with the tuition freezes. According to Vivian Hoffmann, President of the Student Union at UBC, “the provincial government wants to ensure that education remains affordable to everyone.” Hoffmann realizes that although bursaries, grants, and scholarships are available, they rarely cover the total cost of education, In addition, numerous students are unaware of when and how to apply for such assistance. Many students at UBC have complained that although tuition is frozen, the school has introduced other fees in order to raise funds. Recently, the university increased ancillary fees by $36 per term. Students launched a legal challenge against UBC. A court ruled that the increased fees were out of order and must be

removed. A referendum carried out by the Student Union is now required before any anciIlary fees may be increased. Hoffmann believes that the rest of the country could learn a lesson from the tuition freezes granted in B.C. “Many people argue that tuition hikes are necessary to support higher education,” says the Student: Union President. “Three years of successful tuition freezes in B.C. proves that alternatives exist.” A few weeks ago, Federal Finance Minister Paul Martin announced some new funding programs, including the Millennium Scholarship, for higher education. However, none of these measures restore previous cuts in transfer payments, In total, B.C. has lost $99 million in funding. Students at UBC fear that tuition freezes cannot be sustained for long given the sharp decline in Federal transfer payments. .

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Friday,

March

13, 1998

Improving campus safety Students urged to submit proposals by Aleem Kanji special to Imprint

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ampus safety and security is a concern shared by students, faculty and staff at Waterloo. The Universi ry of Waterloo’s Personal Safety Advisory Committee (PSAC) has revised new Terms of Reference, which include: communication about personal safety items with the campus community on a regular basis; development of joint educationat strategies that address personal safety for the campus community; and provision of advice by appropriate University offices on personal safety concerns. This

advice will be provided on both an ongoing and annual basis. Once again this year, the University of Waterloo has been awarded a grant from the Ontario Ministry of Education and Training to continue to improve the safety on campus by supporting programs that deal with women’s safety, sexual harassment and violence against women. The PSAC encourages feedback from all University members. Student Safety Auditors are available to meet with campus groups or answer questions about the Safety Audit Program. Interested individuals can contact the auther at aakanji&ousteau for more information.

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Theft On February 23, UW Police completed an investigation into theft of cash from various locations at St. Jerome’s University. An individual has been arrested and charged with theft of over $5000. The individual has been charged as a young offender and will have a court date set in the near future. On the night of February 25, a staff winter coat was stolen from the Columbia Icefield Arena. The coat is a man’s bomber style jacket in UW colors with a UW Staff patch on the left breast. On February 27, four standard full-sized hub caps were reported stolen from a ‘92 BMW in’ J-Lot. On March 3, a fire extinguisher was stolen near DC 1941. Also on March 3, $70 in cash was stolen from a purse in the basement washroom of Needles Hall. During the period from Feb 23 to March 5, various bikes were stolen from Carl Pollock Hall, St. Jerome’s University, Resurrection College, Ron Eydt Village North D, and Environmental Studies Two.

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Any concerns about specific problem sites on campus or potential grant project ideas should be directed to Kevin Stewart in the Safety Office in the Health Services Building or at kastewar@mcladm. Deadline for submissions is Friday, March 20, 1998. The PSAC cautions students to always use lighted pathways when walking on campus at night, and to avoid taking shortcuts, especially if walking alone on campus. Readers can conduct their own personal safety tours of campus on the Internet at www.adm.uwaterloo.ca/infohs/ personal-tour/person.htm.

Medical Calls On February 20, a female student at St. Jerome’s suffered an epileptic seizure. She was not transported to hospital. On February 24, a student lost consciousness at Biology 2. She recovered shortly thereafter

and was not taken to hospital, On February26 a young man suffered a hand laceration involving a broken ashtray while at the Bombshelter. He was subsequently transported to hospital by UW Police. On February 28, a swimmer participating in the lifeguard competition at the PAC pool suffered from an asthma attack. She was transported to Grand River Hospital via ambulance. On March 1, in the Married Students Apartments, a 1O-day old infant was choking and unable to breathe. The infant was taken to hospital. On March 5, an individual at St. Jerome’s was picked up by police after having trouble breathing as a result of ingesting six beers and an aspirin. The individual refused transport to hospital and was taken care of by a friend. On March 7, a young man suffered an injury while moshing. He was struck in the face with an elbow which broke his glasses and gave him a cut above his left eye.. The cut appeared to need stitches and the individual was given a taxi ride to Grand River Hospital.

MiscelIaneous ‘On February 21, a vehicle was reported damaged in South Lot of 157 University Ave in the Married Students Apartments. The right rear signal light was smashed with an unidentified object and there was no evidence of a collision with another vehicle. And at 10145 on the night df

Feb 21, a male complainant accompanied by a female friend were on the Vl watkway heading towards S3 when a motor vehicle began driving alongside them. The complainant then asked the driver of the vehicle why he was drivingalongside the walkway and correctly pointed out that the vehicle had no business on the walkway without permission: The driver of the vehicle then stopped driving, exited the vehicle and challenged the complainant to a fight. After the complainant wisely refused, he was assaulted by the driver. Two unidentified passengers in the vehicle then yelled at the driver to stop, at which point the driver re-entered his vehicle and drove away. On February 27, the driver of a ‘98 white Ford van failed to notice a ‘95 green BMW passing through the middle of the Columbia Street entrance to the university and subsequently oollided with it. On the night ofhlarch 6, there was a break-and-entry into the Columbia Lake Townhouses Laundry Facility. Subjects broke into and ransacked the supcrintendant’s office and also stole several personal items. Subjects also attempted to break into coin-operated machines, presumably to extract coins. They succeeded indamagingtwo machines beyond repair. It should be pointed out now that the coins are collected on a regular basis and there is not a large amount of money in the machines at any time. Waterloo Regional Police Forensics were later called in to dust for fingerprints. As usual, readers having any information regarding the incidents mentioned in this article, are encouraged to contact UW Police(888-4567, extension491 1) or Waterloo Regional Police Crimestoppers. I~nformation may be given anonymously at both numbers.

IMPRINT,

Friday,

March

Campus Question: by Rachel E. Beattie and Cindy Hackelberg

NEWS IN BRIEF

(photos)

What wouldn’t you do

by Jenny Imprint

for $1,OOO.OOO?

“Run around campus naked, especially in this weather.”

Sui Yu Chen 1B Science

NEWS

13, 1998

“I wouIdn’t let a blind person with a nervous condition shave my pubic hair with an exact0 knife.n

Optometry staff member is mourned Waterloo’s Optometry Department is mourning the loss of staff member Lynn Maxwell, who passed away earlier this week. Maxwell worked as a low-vision assistant in the Optometry School’s Centre for Sight Enhancement. Maxwell began her employment at UW in July of 1989 as a secretary/receptionist in Optometry. She was described by her colleagues as having an “open, candid, and even humourous way of dealing with her experience” of battling breast cancer, and will be greatly missed.

Hooray for K-W’s Health Centre staff

Pat Maloney 1B Political science

“Be a stats TA.”

“Make love to a sumo wrestler.” ,

Julie Koruna 1B Environmental Studies

Brad Appleby 18 Environmental Studies

Brock confirms OUSA membership

Gilbert staff

Doctors are praising the heroic efforts of a medical team at the K-W Health Centre who saved the life of Waterloo Collegiate Institute student Jeff Mitchell. Mitchell was stabbed in the heart last Tuesday by a fellow classmate. Dr. David Judges, Dr. Paul Shortley and nurse Kristi Neil1 accompanied Mitchell on the ambulance ride to the London Health Sciences Centre after performing an emergency surgery on the teen. The trio made the trip because they were concerned that the young man’s wound would start bIeeding again. Kitchener surgeon Dr. David Leask called the incident a “truly exceptional performance by everyone involved.”

: Fischer-Hallmkh I I

Students at Brock University have voted to remain full members of the On‘rario Undergraduate Student Alliance (OUSA). The referendum to confirm membership in OUSA was required by local regulations. Two thirds of the voters said “Yes” to continuing the school’s OUSA membership. According to Jason Coolmati, president of the Brock Students’ Union, “Brock students clearly believe their intefests will be best served by OUSA memberi ship.”

Youth Opportunities Ontario Strategy Minister of Education and Training Dave Johnson and Minister of Economic Development AI Palladini have launched a “Youth Oppotunities of Ontario Strategy” to bring together programs aimed at helping young people find jobs. Youth Opportunities Ontario will coordinate promotion of all of Ontario’s major youth training and employment initiatives. I The initial campaign includes promotionoftheMinistryofEducationandTraining’s Job Connect and the Young Entrepreuners Program, which is a part: nership between the Ministry of Economi Development, Trade and Tourism, an 5 the Royal Bank. In coming weeks, addi! tional campaigns will be launched to inf form youg people about services such a$ Ontario Summer Jobs 1998 and the On+ tario Youth Appreciation Program. ’t

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Weasel Hunting &de Easy by Peter tenardon

- Editor

Is it art?

in Chief

The forum pages allow members of the University of Waterloo community to present their views on various through letters to the editor and longer comment pieces. me opinions expressed in columns, comment pieces, and other articles are strictly those of the authors, not of Imprint.

issues letters

The University of Waterloo Student Newspaper Friday, iarch 13,1998 - Volume 20, Number 30 A A Student Life Centre, Room 1116,University of Waterloo, Waterloo, Ontario, N2L 3Gl Ph: 519-888-4048 - Fax: 519-884-7800 - e-mail: editor@imprint.uwaterIoo.ca www: http://imprint.uwaterIoo.ca

Editorial Editor in Chief Assistant Editor Forum Editor News Editor News Assistant Arts Editor Arts Assistant Sports Editor Sports Assistant Human Editor f Human Assistant Science Editor Photo Editor Photo Assistant WWW Page Editor WWW Page Assistant Systems Administrator Graphic Editor Proofreaders

Board Peter Lenardon Kieran Green Matt Feldman Natalie Gillis Owen Gregory Jonathan Evans Rachel E. Beattie Greg Picken Mark Besz Ali Smith Laurie Bulchak Jessica Kwik Niels Jensen Wendy Vnoucek Justin Kominar Peter Damm Graham Dunn Darryl Hodgins James Daouphars Kimberly Ellig Marissa Fread Jenny Gilbert Lisa Johnson

Staff Business AdvYProduction v Advertising

Manager Manager Assistant

Marea Willis Laurie Tigert-Dumas Cindy Hackelberg Craig Hickie

Distribution Brian

Benson

Board

-Mark

Watters

of Directors

President Vice-President Secretary Directors at Large Staff Liaison

Justin Kominar Niels Jensen Ali Smith Lisa Johnson Debbra McClintock vacant

Contribution

List

Ryan Chcn-Wing, Dar&l IXBcncdctto, Mike Downing, I&a Earlc, Chris Edginton, Siu Hong Yu, Wassily Kandinski, Maria Kania, Slccm Kanji, Darryl Kclman, Bruce tee-Shanok, Lindcboom, â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ara Markidcs, Paul M&u&e, Nesbitt, Amber Neumann, Todd P&grew, Schmidt, Kurt Schreitcr, Pat Spacck, WPIHG

Jack Lcfcourt, Carrie Adam Nacran, Pctc Jackson Pollock, Rob

Imprint is the official student newspaper of the University of Waterloo. It is an editorially indcpendcnt newspaper published by Imprint Publications, Waterloo, a corporation without share capital. Imprint is a member of ehc Ontario Community Newspaper Association (OCNA). Imprint is published every Friday during fall and winter terms, and every second Friday during the spring term. Imprint reserves the right to screen, edit, and refuse advertising. Imprint ISSN 07067380. Mail should be addressed to Imprint, Student Lift Centre, Room 1116, University of Waterloo, Ontario, NZL 3Gl.

Imprint subject gender,

welcomes letters to the editor from students and all members of the community. Letters received via electronic mail must be verified to editing for brevity and clarity. The editor reserves the right to refuse to publish letters or articles which are judged to be libellous race, religion or sexual orientation. Opinions expressed are those of the individuals and not of Imprint.

Comedy of errors

he review of the Royal Winnipeg Ballet’s Romeo and Jdiet displays an abysmal lack of insight, knowledge, and critical ability. This article drops a few miscellaneous names, inane references to the performance space and vague notice of artistic elements (“The dancers moved gracefully and effortlessly...“), without giving any coherent description, interpretation or evaluation. Some superficial praise is thrown around, but no mention made of the composer, choreographer, conductor, et& This letter was originally going to be far more scathing: the sophmoric excuse for art criticism insults the tradition of classical ballet, the precision of choreographic orchestration, the dancers’ incredible feats of technical and artistic virtuosity, and, not feast, the intelligenceof the reader audience. I, for one, would like to know when Romeo and Juliet became a “tale of unrequited love.” Tracy Mason and ErinWorkman, whatever other journalistic abilities they may possess, seem to have no knowledge of presentation, choreography, the history of dance, or its relevance. While I realize that our society provides little in the way of arts education, there are many ways for competent writers to inform themselves and present readers with a discriminating appraisal of such an honourable art. Research, for example, has proven useful in providing previously unknown information. One needn’t go far: your show program is right on your lap. In cases of tota ineptitude, even an imitation of other, well-written criticism is acceptable. Just for your information: Romeo andJu/ietis a production in its own right, not just a newfangled “rendition of the play.” In ballet, ro1es are danced rather than played. And “Tutu” is one word, not hyphenated. We don’t expect perfection. Out of respect for the art and for your readers, just try a /&!e bit harder.

fused to comment on the issue.” Well, last I checked, I’m Brown and not one Imprint staff member asked me for a comment. So let’s set the record straight. We, the Bomber staff, in the course of our jobs, work to create an atmosphere that al1 students can take part in and enjoy. Sometimes this comes at the expense of our own studies but it’s a good job and we take pride in it. Once a term, when exams are finished and the bar is closed, we throw a little party and have a litt1e fun. What goes on at that party is nobody’s business but the staff, the management, and the Federation of Students. If there was ever a problem at that party involving staff, rest assured that it has been dealt with. As for what matters now, Iet’s talk about the ongoing problems with the bar. Let’s talk about the stereo system that sounds, when it works at all, like Fred on a Sunday morning, or the wobbly table syndrome which just sucks. These things can’t continue to be fixed with duct tape and nails if the Bomber is to continue to be successful. As students, worry about this stuff and leave the staff problems to the management and the Feds - it’s their job. As for my situation, the Feds and I have parted on friendly terms, and I’m going to get on with my life outside of university. I would like to thank all the staff at the Bomber for their support and friendship, the faithful patrons who kept me employed, and Larry Vaughn for being my employer and good friend. My seven years of schooling are over (although I’m still not a doctor) and I hope my loud sense of humour will be remembered as much as I will remember the Bomber. It was one hell of a run. - Moose Former Bombshelter Manager

Ass. Man.‘s final comment

his is just a little tidbit about last week’s issue concerning the events at the Bombshelter. Many stories and second-hand knowledge were used to write that article, and I for one think that’s crap. Specifically, the article says “the Federation of Students, Vaughn, and Brown re-

what

do yo,u see?” Of course, I don’t know for sure that I “get it” either, since I haven’t had the opportunity to speak with Krywaniuk, but it’s not about whether he’s right or wrong, because what he is expressing are his opinions. What it’s about is being able to consider a different viewpoint and gain something from that. If you’re confident about and comfortable with your views on every issue, then either you really haven’t examined them, or you’re not being honest with yourself. Since I don’t know that I believe there is such thing as ultimate truth or even a truly objective view, I feel we must broaden our spheres of understanding by seeking out a vari-

AlI material on the basis

is of

ety of experiences and considering alternative perspectives, partitularly theones we most strongly want to deny. It’s an ongoing exercise in humility. Back in early December, I was on campus briefly and picked up a copy of the November 28 Iron Warrior. I read with gjeat interest Krywaniuk’s article **Presentation Matters.” It was one of the better pieces of intelligent writing I’d seen in a while and I remember thinking’ “Too bad this guy won’t be around in the winter term? Weil, I’m happy that he is and look forward to a weekly tweaking of my perspective. -

En2 Rautnguti

OutRage

by Lauren Stephen

ecently, I’ve been involved in an on-line discussion about the word ‘queer’ as an identifying label. Some people refer to themselves as gay or queer interchangeably. Others are offended by the term and don’t want to be associated with it, while some people actually prefer to identify themselves as queer. Objections to the term often come from those who perceive it as an insult; which is part of the point. Appropriating an insulting term and using it positively is a method of taking away some of its

The Parking Lot is Full

destructive power. Just think of the number of hip hop groups who refer to themselves as ‘niggaz’ in defiance of ‘nigger’ as an insult (N.W.A. jumps to mind). Beyond this defusing of an insulting term, ‘Queer’ is also used to transcend some of the limitations of other identifying labels. ‘Queer’ implies a blurring or transgression of the rigid boundaries between gay and straight, male and female, or any system of classification which seeks to contain identity. continued

to page 10

by Pete Nesbitt and Pat Spacek

Assistant

Just whose voices are they, anyway?

magazine setting. We are not challenging the magazine’s aesthetic or literary merits since beauty is an imprecise ideal. What we are cha1lenging in Voim is their claim of “variety.” Erotica is a legitimate and interesting subject to explore, and we are not contending the editors’ right to do so. Yes, sexual preferences do come in different flavours - as some parts of the female anatomy mentioned in the magazine do -but does championing certain sexual tastes “empower women whose voices have traditionally been marginalized?” Yes, it does give legitimacy to some who have been marginalized, but what about the other voices? Further, many photos in the magazine objectified their subjects (“Just a Body”) which feminists have been fighting against for decades. Were the photos reiterating the fact that women are objectified? Ifso, what purpose did this accomplish? If the Irojces simply wanted to “spice up” their latest issue with sexual imagery - and hey, sex does sell why mention “gender issues” r note the plural) at ali? If Voices was to have sexuality as a theme, why not a spectrum of sexuality? A one-party system is not the democracy that Vos’ces seems to advocate. There were limits placed on the number of contributions one was able to make to Voices, yet certain women seemed to have the run of the magazine. If the intent of the magazine was to showcase the works of certain women, then do not mask that desire with the claim of representing the collective voice of women. A distinction should be made between feminists publishing, and feminist pu blishings.

with a signature. or discriminatory

Voices of Womyn, hen coming out of International Women’s Week, hit the newstands, we were looking forward toa publication that explored the various voices of women. The editorial promised “to celebrate women in all their variety and beauty.” What we found, however, was an indulgent magazine dedicated to an exclusive women’s club. Although the creative pieces in the magazine did explore diverse themes and issues, the uni-theme of the images, unfortunately, over-powered the text. One cannot believe that text and image can be divorced in a

Somebody who may actually get it

n Andrew Krywaniuk’s latest column (“Manifest Discontent - Part I”, March 6), he alludes to the criticism that he has drawn with his opinions. I must agree with him that the people who have thus far chosen to respond to his Invective Irreverence seem to be those who just don’t “get it.” While I don’t necessarily agree with everything that Krywaniuk writes, I do highly value his provocative views and interesting perspective. That’s what it’s about for me: perspective. In each column, what he says is, “See this situation? Know what’s going on? OK, but try looking at it through this lens. Now

If you think this is disturbing,

you’re

obviously

not nedl+‘hungry

enough. T

FORUM

10 continued

from

page 9

Heterosexuals can be queer, with the right attitude, and gay people aren’t necessarily so. ‘Queer’ is actually a better word than ‘gay’ to have as the opposite of ‘straight. ’ ‘Straight’ originally $eant normal, while gay meant happy; and of course normal and happy aren’t exactly opposites. Queer, meaning unusual or abnormal, makes more sense as the antonym of ‘straight.’ Of course, no one who is gay wants to think of themselves as abnormal exactly, but identifyingyourselfas ‘queer’ suggests that you think there’s something wrong with what most people consider normal. It may be this antagonistic aspect of being ‘que’er’ that makes people most uncomfortable with it. Accepting the term means accepting that fitting perfectly into the straight world is not only impossible, but actually harmful since being ‘normal’ becomes a bad thing. I don’t believe any label is adequate to describe me (or anyone else), but we probably won’t stop arguing about the distinction between words like gay and queer until people stop getting so uptight about sexuality.

Invective

The Besz Dispenser Apathy

ell, this column was created so I could harp on anything and anyone that pissed me off at any given time. Anything that pissed me off, I would criticize, Unfortunately, I have let you down. I’m not sad, or even angry this week. In fact, you could say I’m. . *happy. Yes, I’m frightened too. This is a first. Oh course, I’m not ecstatic about life all of a sudden, but I am not bitter, angry, or anything about any specific thing. I simply don’t care. Apathy is a wonderful thing. Well, not really. Apathy sucks because it means that you care about nothing and you’re not doing anything to help anyone or anything. That can’t be good at all. But this happens to everyone, and it is hard to force someone to care about something. Look at the Bloc Quebecois. They’ve been trying for years. The question remains, how do you force someone to care? I don’t really know. I could say that you have to look at America for the answer, but who really wants to turn into them? To have a president who skipped ,Vietnam, but wants to startwWII1 with Saddam mocking him. Well, at least their leader is getting some action, and not looking like a pirate. I think we voted for him because of his appearance. What else” could cause some stirring of the spirit? Sports maybe? Well, let’s pass on that. We bit the dust in hockey (well, we did, didn’t we?) and if you’ve been looking at the Raptors lately,

Irreverence

by Mark Best

R’ Us there’s nothing to brag about quite yet. So let’s pass on that idea, And we can’t start a war, because we have no manpower or weaponry for the task. Although we can kick anyone’s ass one on one. But how bad is it when the East Edmonton Mall has more operable submarines then our own Navy? Pretty bad, I’d say. Hell, we don’t even care about the Gulf War - Part 2, or lack of it. Did anyone follow that? Or were the Olympic Hockey games more rousing? I was pretty sad about that. America on one side, Saddam (or anti-Christ, whichever label applies) on the other, and the rest of the world on the sidelines, shouting that this can’t go on. Except Canada, because quite frankly, we better do something. We’re right beside the U.S. If Saddam sent something this way, we’d get front row seats. And to be next to a nuke is not fun. So what can we do to bring up some gusto, some life to the people, make them care for something again? Again, I have no answers, but maybe, just maybe, we can get Clinton, Saddam, Monica, Hillary, Socks the Cat, whatever that dog’s name is, Chretien, Bouchard, Manning, Harris, some health care officials, all the Maple Leafs, and the entire World Wrestling “Federation all on Jerry Springer. All in one damn episode. Let them all fire it off. Give them weapons. That would not only solve everyone’s problems, but it would be a really apathybreaker for everyone at home.

by Andrew Krywaniuk

Manifest discontent - Part II

ast week, I claimed that universities are doing a poor jobofproviding technology-oriented education. Let me give you an example: Despite spending a fortune on fancy computers, my department has barely changed its curriculum since the 1970s. Computers may only be a tool, but they are a powerful one, and they have altered the face of industry. Much of my education has been completely obsolete for at least ten years. Pencil and paper problem solving and engineering “rules of thumb” have been largely replaced by computer simulations and number crunchrng. Think back to what your early education taught you. Hand-held calculators have made mentai arithmetic a pointless exercise. And thanks to my computer’s spell-checker, my finely-honed spelling skills are now obsolete. And yet, these antiquated skills are still taught. My elementary school teacher’s reason for making me learn my times-tables was *‘What if you were lost in the woods and you

needed to know 11 x 12?” I thought that was a pretty lame excuse, but my university courses aren’t much better. Now it’s more complicated. What if you’re in the middle of the woods and you need to calculate the integral of cos(x) by using a paper clip to scratch algebraic equations on a piece of bark? That’s your average paper and pencil exam in a nutshell. Now, you might be wonderingwhy you should trust myopinion over those of the experts, That’s a toughie, but let me take a swing at it. Basically, universities are a self-propagating system. In order to become a university professor, you need to excel within the university environment. While academic institutions are apt to favour applicants from outside institutions, they are not open to candidates who reject the university

system

as a whole.

As a malcontent, I am outside of this cycle. My purpose in writing this column is to ignore dogma and to assess every situation from a fresh perspective. In doing so, ,I often stumble upon opinions that go against the grain, like this one.

I honestly belieie that a system of dogmatic reinforcement has weakened the quality of teaching and made the curriculum stale. Even if you’re in arts, your degree is only worth something because of UW’s prestigious reputation. This reputation is based on public perception, which is largely based on MacLeans laughably volatile annual survey. I’m not suggesting that college graduates are better educated than university grads. I’m merely suggesting an alternate explanation for why a university degree means anything. In the computer world, it’s called GIG0 (garbage in, garbage out). If universities have higher entrance requirements thancolleges then their graduates are likely to be better educated. Right now, your credentials mean a lot more than what you actually learn. But if the private sector ever catches on to this sham, and stops treating a university degree like the word of God, then you’ll be up the creek. And I’m betting that they will. . . Nothing lasts forever except blood and tears.

IMPRINT, would

Friday,

March

13, 1998

Well, no it wouldn’t. But it be fun, wouldn’t it?

about now.

Complaint

Oh, I guess I should tell you what that email address is. It’s ~u~~~~~-~t.uwu~~~~oo.cu. Now you can complain to me about anything, tell me what pisses you off (please, no witty “your column” responses, unless you can make an argument to the effect) or offer suggestions on future column topics. So write away.

Depwtment

Well, I figure I shouldlet you write. to me to tell me that you hate my column, hate my guts, my beliefs, my shirt, et& So I have a new E-mail address. Now, you’re going to have to remember this, write it down now, because it won’t show up every week. So if you want to complain

somethin,’

well,

you

can

~ ~WkTEhLOO PUBLIC ItiER= RESEARCH GROUP Student Life Centrs Room 2139

Ext.2570or008-4082

4wpirg&dsanl .uwoterloo.ca~ 4http://watsmvl .uwcatarloo.~/-wpirga

MEDIA

and the MAI

-aybe you’ve heard of the MAI - the Multi lateral Agreement on Investment. Maybe you haven’t. Chances are you’ve heard of the Canada/US. Free Trade Agreem&t and you’ve probably heard of NAFTA (the North American FreeTrade Agreement). You may have even heard that a company in the U.S. (Ethyl Corporation), thanks to NAFTA, is currently suing the Canadian government for several hundred million dollars because Canada banned the import of their product. The Canadian government argued that Ethyl Corp’s fuel additive contained a nerve-toxin which could threaten the environment and the health of Canadians. This decision by the Canadian government clearly limits Ethyl Corp. to make a profit and under NAFTA, Ethyl Corp. has the right to sue Canada for these losses. The MA1 is a lot like NAFTA, but bigger. In fact, it provides even more protection for corporations. If you have heard of the MAI, you likely heard that it was a terrible, anti-democratic thing which will threaten Canadian sovereignty, result in further environmental destruction, and an even deeper erosion of our sacred social programs. You may have heard thattheCityofKitchenerrecently passed a resolution which asked the Federal Government to suspend negotiations on the Multilateral Agreement. You may have also heard the MA1 is a necessary agreement which will finally place some international rules on foreign investment, which will help economies, and people, around the world. My guess is that what you heard really depends on where you heard it. The MA1 has been appropriately called “NAFTAon steroids” by Maude Barlow. Appropriate since steroids are something that cause a pain in the souls of most Canadians - and the MA1 has certainly caused many Canadians pain. Maude, the volunteer C hairperson of the non-government organization, Council of Canadians, has been traveling around the country warning Canadians about the impending disaster to our na-,

tion ifcanada signs the MAI. This agreement has been secretly negotiated since 1995 by member countries of the OECD (the Organization for Economic Co-operation and Development, the 29 richest countries in the world). Chances are you didn’t hear about the MA1 in 1995. A draft version was obtained by the Council of Canadians in March, 1997 and promptly put on the Internet for the world to review. And you may have heard that much of the world is not liking the MAI. France has recently dug its heels in saying that they want assurance that their cultural industries will be protected if they sign the MAI. Canada has made similar noises, yet Sergio Marchi, the Minister who will sign the MAI, has yet to introduce any exceptions, stipulations or conditions to the OECD. Even the United States, which was the driving force behind the OECD negotiations, has started making noises that they are unhappy with the MAI. So does this mean it will die? And if it does, what will that mean for Canada? Not a lot, according to Michelle Swenarchuk, former Executive Director of the Canadian Environmental Law Association. Michelle explained during a recent guest lecture at UW, that a very important story is not being told about the MAI. In Michelle’s opinion, it doesn’t matter if the MA1 passes or not in Canada. We are already a signatory to NAFTA - and the MA1 has been written with most of the text directly from NAFTA. Most of Canada’s foreign direct investment (about two thirds) comes directly from the United States both before and after the FTA and NAFTA. The MA1 will not likely change this. Finally, Canada is currently negotiating over 60 bilateral agreements with countries around the world. The Free Trade Agreement of the Americas (FTAA) is being negotiated furiously to extend NAFTA to the southern tip of South America. Even without the MAI, Canada may soon find itself as a signatory to dozens of trade and investment agreements. Why is this story not being told?

Romping down the CD part of town; i

Recordable technology rolls compact discs into the next century by Rob Schmidt Imprint staff

D-R isn’t new technology but it is definitely hot. The prices of recordable CDs have been dropping fast, commonly found for under four dollars and at that price they are easily the most cost effective and convenient way of archiving files. Without a doubt, CD-ROM companies hoped it would never come to this. Over the past three years the piracy protection has been the vast sizes of games which, when over four CDs, were not cost effective to pirate. Not to mention the fact that CDs have replaced floppies as the portable media of choice. What is CD-R anyway? CDR stands for Compact Disc (dub) Recordable. It isn’t much more ccimplicated than a regular CD. There is a reflective coat usually made of gold and an organic dye which is the active ingredient in the mix. The dye is photosensitive and a much higher power laser than in your current CD-

ROM (but nothing really high power so it doesn’t I actually “burn”) makes pits in the dye. The result is a disc that can be read by any standard CD-ROM with few exceptions. The really complicated part of CD-R isn’t the chemistry (since chemists are magicians in actual fact); it is the file structure standards that are far from standard. In the world of computers (where people don’t take showers and rarely speak real English) they saw a digital format of playing music called the CD-DA (Digital Audio) and said, “Hey, we can do that with da.ta,” and so they did. Little did they suspect that merely writing one session on an entire disk would be enough (That is to say that all the data ever to be written to that disk had to be done all at once). Kodak. being the wonderful people they are, started using the technology of CD-R many moons ago. PhotoCD was a little bit of a sales flop but nonetheless brought us the multisession CD. They needed a way to write

24 pictures now and more pictures later to best utilize the media they were using. Multisession

while decreasing the amount of available space for music was too great for some. The XA (ex-

*‘And I see Timmy and Nadine and Rienne and Travis and Siu!” photo

seemed to be everythinganybody ever needed. “Why not music and data?” someone thought. The need to have fun computer music videos and increase the production costs

bv lessica Kwik

tended) mode CD was born. What more could you want? Well the current final chapter is incremental packet writing CDRs. They allow one to write small packets at a time which, when

directly mounted, can make a CDL R act like any other drive and cati even virtually, not actually, era& data on the disc. Mind you, only CD-ROMs made after each of these standards were invented ark able to read the corresponding discs. How fast can you burn one of these golden wonders? Well it depends on your drive. Most $500 burners burn at 2X which means a 650 MB disc equivalent to 74 minute audio disc burns in 37 minutes. For more money you get more speed; the newest burners at 6X are over $1000. What about reliability? Well, our tests indicate about a 1 in 10 failure rate if you know what you are doing. Although this rate increases when irate girlfriends who feel ignored kick the burner just to be spiteful, these CDs aren’t always lost - occasionally you can close the session you were working on and start a new one. Of course you lose all the data that had already been burned. If the CD isn’t recoverable just don’t microwave it, whatever you do.

Alcohol taken a drink too far. I) l

Is alcoholism a social disease or a genetic predisposition? by Lisa Earle special to Imprint lcoholism’s ‘nature ver3us nurture’ debate has continued for well over a century. We know that alcoholism is an insidious and complex social problem, and is considered a ‘disease’ by such authorities as the American Medical Association, Wortd Health Organization, and the American Psychological Association. However, the exact nature of the relationship between alcoholism, genes and social environment remains ambiguous. One in three North American households suffers from the profound effects of alcoholism. We clearly need to improve our understanding of the development of alcoholism in order to prevent and treat it more effectively. The corollary is the question of whether medical science has anything useful to offer abusers of alcohol. Alcoholism is accepted as a chronic affliction, the nature of which may change over time, but

is it really a disease? The ‘disease concept’ is problematic for some critics whose concerns are threefold: first, the ‘disease concept’ oversimplifies alcoholism at the expense of its social etiology (and is therefore bad science). Alcoholism as a “disease” removes the moral stigma from alcoholism, and encourages the alcoholic to avoid responsibility and personal accountability. Lastly, the “disease concept” has been actively lobbied by the alcoholic beverage industry (if the person’s genes are the root of alcohol abuse, these businesses’ products cannot be considered categorically harmful, thereby fending off higher taxes, marketing restrictions, and public restraints on alcohol availability and consumption). Proponents of the ‘disease concept’ argue that while we may take precautions to stay healthy, our genes will render us susceptible to certain diseases. Like other diseases, alcoholism may be beyond our control. After all, those who eat well, exercise and avoid smoking may still get hypertension, heart disease and cancer. Furthermore, alcohol abusers who label themselves ‘ill’, and not

‘bad’, tend to have higher selfesteem, are more likely to change and alfow others to help them. On the other hand, the ‘alcoholic personality’ of dependence and instability may be secondary to the actual disease, according to a study done at Harvard. The 40year longitudinal study suggests a number of reasons to support this claim. First, genetic factors play an important role in alcohoIism, although the specific genes in-

ho1 abuse was once thought to be associated with hypoglycemia, malnutrition, or an allergy to altohoi). The third point made by the Harvard study is that, unlike diseases like multiple sclerosis or diabetes, there is noevidence that alcoholism is inevitably progressive - once it develops, it can remain chronic for decades without either getting worse or better. Fourth, alcohol-dependent persons cannot normally return to

volved have yet to be elucidated. Studies of adopted children have shown that biological parents, and not the adopted environment, are better predictors of whether alcoholism will afflict the adopted child. Second, there are no other fundamental biochemical or metabolic differences between alcoholics and non-alcoholics (alco-

stable or controlted drinking; an alcoholic is such for life. And lastly, there is no difference in psychological scabiliry between alcoholics and non-alcoholics before the disease sets in. Thus, the ‘alcoholic personality’ may be secondary to the actual disease, if not a myth altogether. This does not mean that environmental factors such as poor child-

hood and depression should be dismissed altogether. As far as treatment is concerned, prolonged (psychiatric) hospitalization appears to be of limited efficacy. Alcoholics recover because they choose to heal themselves. Effective ‘treatment’ can be compared to that of diabetes, in which the individual is trained to prevent relapses. Pro: fessional intervention is peripheral. Cognitive behavioural therapies and medication have been found to merely augment conventional wisdom and self-help programs such asAhMicsAnonymtm (AA). However, more recovering alcoholics begin stable abstinence throughAA than through clinical treatments, regardless of socioeconomic class. Empirical evidence supports these conclusions unequivocally. The long-term course of alcoholism cannot be easily altered, but we need not despair. The research community is acknowledging the importance of natural healing and self-help processes. Clinics might not ultimately cure alcoholics, but they do reduce suffering and help raise selfawareness for their patients.

SCIENCE

IMPRINT,

Friday,

March

13, 1998

The sobering tale of hayfever in light of spring by Siu Hong Yu special to Imprint 44

-1

can’t wait until of my friends without realizing the ver sufferer, like me, would rhinitis, commonly known the most common chronic

spring,” one complained, pain a hay fehave. Allergic as hay fever, is respiratory ill-

activities. Having less energy and being more fatigued, the patients may even experience altered mental health and poor social functioning, along with more physical and emotional limitations. Other studies have shown that 80 percent of patients with hay fever have sleep problems.

The Big Costs

pollens released by various seasonal plants such as ragweed. Flower pollens are too heavy to be airborne but still cannot be ignored as a potential allergen, particularly for florists, gardeners, or flower hobbyists. A careful history and physical examination of the patient would be adequate to diagnose the disease. For confirmation, a simple test for an increased number of eosinophils in nasal secretions or tears could be done. In order to identify the specific cause of the particular allergic rhinitis, allergen-specific IgE anti bodies are detected by allergy skin tests.

trol symptoms, the last alternative to be considered would be immunotherapy (also called hyposensitization or desensitization). Of course just Iowering the inflammatory response is not an actual cure. Researchers are also looking at ways to

Any Cure?

ness. Since it is not a life threatening disI ease, too many health care professionals ; consider it trivial. However, as all the poor sufferers know just too well, the symptoms of hay fever can have a tremendously negative impact on quality of life. Hay fever sufferers not only become frustrated and irritable, the disease also limits their work, school, and recreational

eating the public how best to recognize, prevent, and treat hay fever is probably the only way to reduce this huge cost.

Major Causes Ninety percent of allergic rhinitis cases are caused by repeated exposure to allergens. Seasonal allergic rhinitis is caused primarily by the microscopic airborne

In any case, the easiest way is to stay away from the allergens as much as possible, However, this might not always be possible and in such a case, pharmaceuticals are the next best defense. The newer drugs available in the current market are less sedating compared to the old ones. Since allergic rhinitis is basically a disease of inflammation, anti-inflammatory medications such as antihistamines and corticosteroids can also be used. New medications under development that modify or block the effects of leukotrienes may eventually make it to pharmacy shelves. If both environmental control and pharmacotherapy fail to con-

gens and actually alter the allergic response. Laboratories are developing specific humanized monoclonal antibody to IgE. This monoclonal antibody not only reduces the number of IgE molecules in the body, it also inhibits the amount of inflammationcausing histamine that’s released by the allergic patient.

Wit/lfiii3from Discover

magazim

Notice is hereby given of the General Meeting of the Federation’of Students University of Waterloo,a corporationunder the laws of the Province of Ontario to be held on Wednesday,March 24, 1998at 7:30 p.m. in the Multipurpose room of the StudentLife Centre.The agendafor this meeting is as follows: 1

Appointment of the Board of Directors 1998-1999

Officers’ Report 1997-1998

Motion pursuant to By-Law 1, Article IV= “Be it resolved that the Federation of Students fee be set at $24.65 per student effective September 1, 1998.”

Motion to strike By-Law 1, Article VII, Section K concerning the Meetings Schedule of Students’ Council:

Adjournment

The Agenda for this meeting is restrictedto the above items of business,for which proper notice has been given. Proxy forms are available in the Federation of Students’ offke, SLC 1102. Thesemust be returned by Tuesday March 24, .1998at 4:30 p.m. For all those who attend the meeting, pleasemake sure to bring your WATCARD.

FEDERATIOLUOFSTUDEHTS

Whv should vou hate UW?A satirical look at all of the “problems” with the universitv J

by Daniel R. DiBenedetto special to Imprint

hate this school. Everything about it just sucks. The people, the services, the very grounds that some of you delusioned schmucks seem to hold so dear-1 despise. Let’s start with the obvious, shall we? I have never seen an institution with as little regard for its students as the University of Waterloo. There is nothing to indicate that the administration has any regard for us and, in fact, they seem to mock us with obviously lacklustre services. Look at the Campus Cove forcryingout loud! Do they honestly think that any of us will be tricked into using their pristine tables and smooth, straight cuessimply because their prices are so low? As for their video games, uh, hi-where’s Space Invaders ? What do they take us for-fools? It gets worse! The “helpful” Turnkey Desk in the SLC is available a mere 24 hours/day, thus being totally unavailable when I need it most. And what do they offer? Nothing but a fantastic music collection ranging from vinyl classics to current pop and fringe CDs, coffee, tea and snacks at blatantly low prices, condoms, counseling, magazines, couches to snooze on, general info on practically anything. I mean-does anybody actually need or want any of this stuff? The only redeeming factor, as far as I’m concerned, is that they will play shitty

Prince songs for drunken Bomber patrons. That helps, but not much. It all adds up to the same complaint when I look at most everything UW-run, quality services at rates that barely cover their cost and are often free. Appalling. Oh yeah, that’s another thing-free stuff. The giving away thereof. This anti-competitive practice certainly doesn’t benefit the cash-strapped students. All it does is line the pockets of corporate monoliths. Why would anyone want to be bombarded with offers of free tupperware, mugs, pizza, pop, seminars on subjeers ranging from safe earwax removal to choosing a soul- mate. Even little things like the University’s “generous” bursary/scholarship program, seemingly safe and beneficial, but nasuperfluous garbage, the lot of it. This smoke-screen of “useful” services need not be confused with the true heroes of the school-our sidewalk merchants. These dear, sweet vendors display their wondrous wares around the SLC for the benefit of all students. I know that, like me, you’ve found hours of pleasure from your Norwegian duck-god pencil-holder. I can even manage to hold my love for these kind tradesmen fast against the overwhelming evidence that the university administration is using

these poor souls (they’re too trusting to realize) for their own nefarious ends. We all know that viable commercial space should be left barren for the common good, but the powers-that-be seem to think thatprofit, of all the things, justify putting the aesthetic wonders of a tiled corridbr to actual use, Of course, they say that it helps reduce costs and thereby promote student services, Hogwash! I’ve already described the outrageous way they treat the student body.

It’s those corporate monoliths all over again- I’m telling you. These same companies that, I suspect, are subtly running this school into corrupted servitude through various corporate sponsorships, are less circumspect when it comes to the co-op program. Now, I don’t know about co-op first hand, but that’s not for a second going to stop me from having an opinion. Near total job placement indeed! Maybe that’s all that counts to the hackneyed, incompetent co-op staff, but why should anyone have to suffer the indignity of being paid well to learn valuable career skills? Furthermore, what about the 1.3%

who are unplaced? All they have is a continuous phase, with nearly twice as many jobs available as there are students. What are they going to do, huh? Get stuck in some job they might think they’re enjoying, while in realicy all their valuable drinking time is being swallowed up whole. Poor bastards. In fact, the only thing that soothes my tattered soul is the knowledge that UW at least has the courtesy to charge a delightfully high fee inversely proportional co the speed of service received by costudents. oP Things like the picture that ran in last week’s Imprint, of those lucky kids lined up way, way, way outside Needles Hall, do my heart good. There is definitely one thing about this school that bothers me more than all the rest put together. It chills my heart and leaves me lying awake nights. The one horrible truth is this: I fear I’m actsa//y leamingsome&ing. Now, don’t misunderstand me, I’m not referring to relatively harmless knowledge like how to tie your shoes, basic trig, or how to cut a steak without cutting yourself. That stuffs pretty safe (if a bit esoteric). What I’m really starting to be concerned about is that, somehow, I’m learning how to think critically about the world around

me. I’m questioning the status quo, writing insightful, satirical articles for Imprint, and kicking back in the SLC discussing the nature of Self. Not because I have to, but because somehow these bastards are changing me! Somehow, they’re making a scholar of me! I’ve tried to resist by focusing on good, wholesome distracting things like profs who don’t speak English or better yet, couldn’t teach a fish to swim. That hefps, but it’s just not enough. The really ironic part about all of this is that this school act2(ally has an international reputation for scholastic excellence. For not only producing scholars, but for producing people capable of grasping the world by the balls and making their brief spark of life count for something. As if that actually mattered more than being a good, tax-paying, wage slave. As if that was more important than working your ass off all day, every day, to make some faceless corporation’s stock go up 0.029% next quarter. As if there was a more worthy purpose in life than getting shit-faced at the end of every day while focusing intently on “Married With Children” or its cranial equivalent. Don’t let them take that away from you! Why should this school be allowed to take away your ignorance and thus, your utopian bliss? So do what we all must to stay sane: Smoke up, drink up, and for Ned’s Sake, stay the hell out of class!

RPW students keep the * faith alive Co-op pefseverence eventually pays off

by Maria K&a special to Imprint

o you’re entering the RPW (for those who don’t know-Rhetoric and Professional Writing) program at the University of Waterloo. Let me paint you a picture of what it means. You’re surrounded by engineers who seem to think the entire job world belongs to them and that arts students are only here to subsidize their tuition, In your first year, you go through the job postings scrarching your head thinking of how a camp counselling job can fit into your program and how a measly $300 a month will take you into your upcoming school term. And

when the co-op coordinator tells you that you shouldn’t be picky and should just take the job because there isn’t anything better coming along, (just what do we pay them for?) you choke back your tears, and brace yourself for a summer of the living dead. You enter your second year with high hopes and $20 in your pocket. And here again you get a surprise. Every second job posted in the overcrowded corridors of “Needless Hell” is for computer science people or-who elsethe engineers. . So, you take a government job in Ottawa, twitch about for four months as you try to make it a professionally valuable -experience. When you come back for

your next school term, you start to question the whole Rhetoric and Professional Writing/Co-op program experience. Is there any sense incontinuingonasan RPW student? Does it get any better? Or are RPW students confined to a life of professional misery and life-long poverty? Or are the engineers right? Undoubtedly, you will have your wretched and unfulfiling jobs. Undoubtedly, you will suffer at the hands of the sometimes dismissing and incapable co-op advisors. Undoubtedly, you will curb your salary expectation, or worse, volunteer (horror!). Undoubtedly, you will DOUBT. All of this is true for most of us. But I’m here to tell you that it does get better.

After putting in your 2 years or so of tedious jobs, you will get a chance to shine. Things will start looking brighter after your second year, when you will take interest in such refined companies as Corel, Newbridge; or Nortel and they in you, You will enter the world of technical writing where English students are essential in bridging the gap between the software/ hardware designers and the customer. Your writing expertise, communication skills, and the ability to understand what the customers need will be in demand. And even if you can’t be bothered waiting for the co-op department to find you a decent technical writing job, do it yourself. There

are numerous Internet sites of Information Technology companies that cry out for co-op students. If you’re willing to relocate (to the U.S. or even Europe) and earn some big bucks (the engineers still get more...but we’re not far behind, believe me!), you are in. Still don’t believe me? Do a search on technical writing jobs on any search engine, and you’ll understand. Many of these co-op positions do not require any experience; they just want to pick your brains. So update your resume. Make it concise and smart. And go out there. You are marketable! You are what they’re looking for! You’re important because you’re a Rhetoric and Professional Writing student!

HUMAN

14 ,

IMPRINT,

Friday,

13, 1998

March

Quiz:Are i you a true Canadian,eh? by Amber Neumann, Kimberly El& and Rachel E. Beattie Imprint staff

a) *‘Wake up in the morning, feeling kind of lonely, gee I gotta go to school...” b) “Shh,. “The Grassy High” is supposed to be o&ode name for ‘Marijuana Hill” c) “Urn.. I think you mean ‘The Grassy Knoll’, as in the place where Lee Harvey allegedly shot J.F.K.

a) Apologize profusely .. . in English and French, and offer to buy them coffee and a Maple doughnut at Tim Horton’s, to make it up to them. b) From the ground, you pounce on their legs. Ifyou’re going down, he’s going down with you! c) Yell to him as he walks away, “if we were in the States, I could legally whip out my gun and shoot more fireworks than on the fourth of July.”

3) You’re walking down the haI and smwune bumps intO you, kmcking you down. Yurc:

4) Afneizd mentions the great B&y Urn. Yob/f fifsf response is: a) I know everything about him,

IS:

1) IVhut ~ORF the Tragically Hip ?nkw?z to you? a) You’re jokin’, eh? The Hip is the best band ever. b) A spasmic disorder in your pelvic region that: causes you to froth at the mouth and limp like Quasimodo. C) The latest slang term which means “cool” on all of the hottest gunways of the New York fashion scene.

How to be a role niodel without Dear

being a hypocrite Aunt

brother who has always been encouraged to go to university and has always dreamt of it. But since I started university, I have ,done nothing but grumble about the exploitation of students, the uselessness of some classes, and the outrageous tuition that I’ll never be able to pay back. Forgetting that impressionable ears were around, I would often lament my decision to attend university. Now my brother says that he doesn’t want to go

because it’s a waste of time. What do I tell him to make him,change his mind? Signed, Help! Dear

Help, Well, you don’t want to come off as a hypocrite, that’s for sure. This situation requires a little carefully-worded rhetoric on your part. Tell your brother that university offers insurmountable benefits, and name some of them: a well-rounded mind, the opportunity for a better career, socialization, etc. But then make sure to include that it is defiriitely not for everyone. Explain that to

base Ris decision on your experience is a poor approach. It is a perplexing tife decision, and he will ultimately regret nQt having made the choice for himself. It is important not to be blind to the contradictions that will undoubtedly surface. Yes, ten thousand dollars is a lot to throw away if it turns out that university is not for him. But then, and as always, quote some higher power: “If you think education is expensive, try ignorance!” I can’t remember who said that, but if you do, let me know. I hope I gave you some of that help you sought. Luv, Aggie

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he played for the Oshawa’Generals, won eight Norris Trophies as the NHL’s best defenseman... and he once had supper with my Mom! b) Laugh and say “it’s so cute how you give proper names to chemical elements.” c) “I idolize him! He is the best player to grace the great American sport of hockey.”

gize for that. Although Canada rocks, you should expand your horizons to new cultures (except the States). It doesn’t matterwhat they say, we won the war of 1812.

Mostly

‘B’S

We don’t think you are even from Earth, let alone Canada. Don’t worry, there’s help. All you have to do is watch every single episode of Due South and You 5)D&zethe LGreutWhiteNot'trlc'. Can’t DoThat On Television ever a) “Take off, eh, ya hoser. Let’s made, then maybe you’ll get a play some beer hunter.” clue. It doesn’t matter what they b) The technical name for the say, we won the War of 1812. biggest shark this *side of the equator. Mostly *C”s c) Duh, everyone knows it’s the We’re afraid of Americans’ so catch phrase for Alaska. go away. If you love America so * much why don’t you marry it? At Mostly “El-i”s least we have medicare and less You’re as Canadian as back crime and more snow, so there. bacon. We bet you know all the P.S.-Weinvented hockeyand basCanadian Heritage Moments off ketball and the telephone and by heart (“Doctor Penfield I smell the United Nations and the burnt toast!“). I bet your main snowmobile and. . It doesn’t focus in life is beer, hockey and matter what you say, we won the maple syrup. No wait, don’t apolo-* War of 1812!!!! l

FEDBack by Kurt Schkeiter special to Imprint rice again the lovely climate at Waterloo has proven that nobody, and I mean NOBODY, can make nice weather last around here, not: even the famed “el nine” (chump). Fear not! Good times are coming to a Student Life Centre near you! March 16 to 20 is going to be one interesting week here in “Happy FED Land”. We’ve got it all....Fine Art, Gross Humiliation of FEDS and Society Presidents and Exec (if that’s your FEDtish), a “Leprechaun Pot 0’ Fun-St. Paddy Party” at the Bomber and a Multicultural Festival in there to add something extra! “What in the name o’ Lucky Charms is that boy talking about? He’s full o’ the Blarney” you say? Let me explain, and I’ll go in chronological order to help me stay focused. .. On Monday and Tuesday we will be having FED Awareness Days. If you want to know something about the FEDS, find out about new and improved ways to volunteer, or just bitch at someone who may be able to direct your *‘Raw Militant Power” into something productive, coke on down! Like Art? Wannasee and hear some of the best stuff Waterloo has to offer? Come to the PHOENIX RELEASE PARTY. Check out some amazing art on display, listen to some of Waterloo’s best poets, writers and musicians, pick up a copy of PHOENIX, the

FEDS annual journal of all things creative. And you want eo talk about a good deal? The PHOENIX is available for DONATIONS, and ALL money will go to Reaching Our Outdoor Friends (R.O.0.F). Tuesday is also the Legendary St. Paddy’s Day Bash at the Bomber. Doors open at 11:30a.m. ‘nuff said. For all those of you thinking of making public asses of your drunken selves on Paddy’s Day remember that it is also Campus Day. Highschoolers you tried to pick up in years gone by and people who know your mother will be all over campus that day so let’s all save it for the appropriate places. Okay? Soak Your President! You’ve sat through their speeches, you’ve disagreed with their decisions, they’re so damn nice and friendly you just want to punch them in the face.. .That would constitute assault, but why not dunk your favorite FEDS or Society Prcsident for charity(R.O.O.F.)? Yo&zow you want to.. . Mario is the only one who hasn’t agreed to go in, but your $24.10 pays his salary and I’m sure if we all demand that he soak himself in the name of R.O.O.F. he’ll do it. . . Oh yeah, did I mention that Dr. Downey might show up? SLC Lower level outside FED Copy Plus. Be there. To cap the week off Thursday will be the FEDS annual Multicultural Festival, come check it out in the SLC. Any Questions? Email Kurt at fedvpin@feds.uwaterloo.ca , or call 888-4567 ex 3780.

The PillsburyDoughboyis way too happy, consideringhe has no genitals. 1

Giddy up! Warriors spank McMaster in OUA West, off to Halifax : . ._, . . .:...: : ::: ,g* ,On the the .h;t~~c;.:i;;, ‘fym&& ;;;j,Y,;,,,, :.:,;,,, : ”’ i::.:. ‘.” : ” : :I,Of 6; Fati ‘#:: :;,:.m;m;i;;m ... : .‘..’ hif is aZI q~&tion ~IK%&III I’ve heen ponderir~g ponderi~~g &r spite T atvhile, Why is. if, cxaetly, thax ‘I[: care’ ab&, al&t:, professiona professianal sparts,),X”k sparts,),X”& be& a bascM1, bisk’etball, football, id hock_e~ -Fan my entire life, I grew up watching the ‘lhunto Torunto Maple Leafs take un the Canadians. 1 spent countless Labou~Day af~ernqansat my cottage, watching the Turonto Argonauts .and the Hamilton Tiger Cats compete. I grew up watching and playing sports, but never once did f ever stop to . an question myselt. Well, I figure, it’s abOuE time 1 did+ And the truthful answer is that I have no idea. It seems, from an objective perspective, that it’s just nor worth putting your heart and soul into the toils of a sports team. After a& things are rarely ever perfect, and most times, downtight: frustrating. The team doesn’t care about you a~ an iad ividuaf , TX”hstr you like them is irrelevant to their cause of making money and maybe e:)ren. winning games, 4s long as you pay into their coffers, &dt’s all that m~rtefs~ Favorite players leave, get traded, or are fo!cefl 1 This is a highly-staged

reenactment of a Bomber staff party. Do not attempt this: These are professional thespians. photo by Darryl Hodgins

by Mike Downing Imprint staff

t’s gonna turn into one of those “where were you when?” things. Where was I when the West was won? On my way to midcourt to join in the pandemonium. How do I write this? What do I say? The Warriors won!! They showed the poise and patience to handle Western then simply outplayed Mac. Yes, defending league champions, five time straight national championship goers, number one ranked in the country Mac. They simply outplayed the Marauders. The game was won at the foul line. From the field, Mac took more shots and made a higher percentage than our Warriors. Yet, at the line, Waterloo shot 20% better and attempted 16 mote. Yet those are just numbers and I’m an English major so let me break it down. They picked a fight with the biggest kid on the block, rolled up their sleeves and slugged it until he dropped bruised and bloody. Let me tell you what it’s all about: It’s all about Halifax baybee! National Championship style. Three games: you win, you play; you lose, you’re out. No questions. No quarter asked or given. Halifax. It’s our NCAA tournament. It’s our Benares. Hoop Canada’s Mecca and Medina. It’s the Shroud ofTurin. It’s...It’s...It’s where we haven’t been in twelve years. We’re league champions. Call home, tell your moms and kid sister my school can hoop. It’s all about All-Canadian superguy Titus Channer bricking so many shots PAC staff were consideringchanging the rims at half-time. I’m not gonna lie, the Warriors struggled in their 2-3 zone first half because they weren’t picking up the shooters. But in the second stanza they turned it up many notches and played the kind of defense that (in the words of Cambridge playground legend “Freaky” Freddy Francis) can Jock a fool up! Mac took 20 more shots than

Waterloo, but still lost. They out-rebounded Waterloo in a big way and still lost. It’s all about defense. It’s all about 3: 1, Mano Watsa’s assist to turnover ratio, which is to say he did his job well. It’s about Mark Eys who suddenly realized that at 6’S’, he’s gonna be a two guard when he declares for the NBA draft next year. So, he decided to put up more threes and hit a lovely 66 per cent. Mike Zavershnik played the least minutes by far and was Player of the Game: 15 points, 7 rebounds in 17 minutes. On his first shift, he does his patended fakeright-drive-left-from-the-high-post move. Next thing you know some 6’9” Mac ruffian has his head split open with a vicious dunk. Next play, breakaway. Another Zav jam. Next play, he’s fouled for two shots. The crowd’s going crazy. This guy came to play. TSN turning point. Second half. Game’s close. Some clownish guard comes wandering through our paint. Jack picks him and he’s off the other. At mid court, he’s ambushed by a pair of unwholesome characters. No problem.

WARRIORS 78, McMaster 74 f;hbb;% ‘“;,,“,;t OUA WESTBASKETBALL FINAL

. them both. Pounds a jam. Thunder. Two refs and the Warriors on to the court. It’s all

have to restrain me from running about all of that. I’m proud of these guys because no one picked them to be champions. No one ranked them number one. They didn’t do it the easy way, but they did it. The guy I’m most proud of is Coach Kieswetter, who took the first team totally recruited by him to the Nationals. Two weeks from now. Three games away. To fulfill a season he began in a dingy PAC side room in front of a group of vets, rooks, and walk-ons with the words “This year, we’re going to win a National Championship.” Well, no one’s doubting anymore. At Laurentian tomorrow, they will square off in a game for the Wilson Cup (for OUA champions East and West) in a game that will affect the rankings in Halifax. Represent. Keep your eyes on the square. Where were you when the West was won?

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IMPRINT,

SPORTS

Friday, March 13, 1998

Warriors Lanced

Anybody elsegoing to Halifax next weekend?

Waterloo loses West in shutout to Windsor

If you’re going to the CIAU Basketball Championships in Halifax, we want to know what you thought. Write it out, bring it clown and we’ll put it in the paper. Let everyone know that you cheered for our guys. PRENTICE

by UW Hockey Team special to Imprint

he Warrior Hockey season ended with a 5-O loss to Windsor on Sunday in the border city. The Lancers will now advance to the Queen’s Cup at the Waterloo Recreational Centre. The Warriors, with a balance of freshmen and veterans knew it was going to be a tough chore to get to the Nationals but finished second in their division and were ranked tenth in the country during late February and March. This is a recognition no one believed they would achieve.

The Warriors will now prepare for a major rebuilding program. Graduating are: Jeff Goldie, leading scorer; Mike Chambers, former Randy Gregg winner; Aaron Kenney; Chad Palmer; Sean Oliver; Greg Fullerton; Dan McKinnon; Greg Esdale; and DavePfohl.Sevenofthesegraduates played on the Warrior team that lost 3-2 to Acadia in the 1996 National Championship. These are quality people and great athletes that will be difficult to replace. They are true Warriors and will be remembered for their contribution to the University of WaterIoo.

photo

by Dave Robins

- Coach McKee thirteenth season considers thirteen he planned on a tionals. -Warrior hockey Jonathan Fowles, coach, who did a

completed his as coach-he unlucky since trip to the Nawishes to thank their strength great job.

HALL

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Warrior forward Rob I

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Windsor 5, WARRIORS 0 OUA West DivisionMavofk In Windsor on Sunday the Lancers scored two first period goals on the power play and it was catch-up for the Warriors. In the second period the Warriors donlinated the play, outshootingWindsor 1 f-7 but were outscored 3-O. Starting the final period down 5 0, the Warriors could have folded their test, but rather played great, outshooting Windosr 1O-6, failing to score on some great chances. The Warriors deserved to win on the Friday night in the Icefield when they lost 4-2, giving up an empty net goal. Jason Brooks and Greg Esdale scored for the Warriors, but other Warrior snipers were unable to bulge the net to get a Warrior victory. The Icefield had its best crowd turnout of the season and it was much appreciated by everyone on the team.

Wanh

Ice clzpibs

- Greg Esdale suffered a shouider injury in Windsor that put a dark cloud on a great career as he is graduating with an Engineering degree. -Will Joe Harris be back to lead the Warrior team between the pipes? Time will tell. - Back-up goalie Ryan Warren made seven entries in the middle of games and only gave up one goal. Very impressive statistic. -Jeff Stewart, the Warriors student manager, completed his first year without the Queen’s Cupa goal he had set for himself. -Warriors will conclude the season with fitness tests, a party or two, and the Athletic Banquet. A full report of trophy winners for the season will be published in an April edition of the Imprint.

THURSDAY,

MARCH 26, 199%

Register by March 16 at the Bomber. 50% of band members must be UW students. Audition by demo tape: 5-10 minutes. w &PC Winner gets to perform at pm@ 6s Sounds of Summer in June! Sa G@ w lpse 86 VSON

by Greg Imprint

Picken staff

nother winter of contract negotiations, cities being held hostage for new stadiums, grown men making $6 million a year comand plaining that they are underpaid underappreciated, owners bitching about needing a new stadium. That’s all over for now, because baseball is back in season! Ok, technically that’s not true because it’s all still going on, but at least now they’re going to play some games. Until the next strike, or lockout, or whatever. Yay for baseball! The past couple of years have seen a dramatic rise in offensive numbers, which in the traditionally looncy sports world means that the team with the best pitching is going to win. Yes, that’s actually acceptable logic in the world of baseball. Essentially, there arc two schools of thought in baseball: you can win either by scoring more runs that the other team, or by giving up fewer runs than the other team. With so many teams focusing on bludgeoning the ball out of the park, it only stands to reason that the team that’s going to win it all is the one that can keep the opposition’s run totals down. The American League is stacking up true to form, with the Yankees, the Orioles, Indians, Mariners, and Angels lining up to set the pace for the rest of the league to catch up to. Each of these teams features a lineup that is stocked from top to bottom with outstanding talent that will produce runs by the bushel. The problem is, each of these teams have glaring weaknesses in the area of starting pitching, and though most would argue to the contrary, the lumber can only carry you so far. The Yankees, for all their offense, have only one legitimate, healthy starter in Andy Pettitte. The Orioles? After Mike Mussina you have a group of ageing and injury prone starters. The Indians have the declining Charles Nagy and the rising Jaret Wright, but beyond that they’re looking at also-rans and neverweres. The Mariners, well, let’s just say that when the Mariners unload Randy Johnson, they will officially have one good pitcher left. The Angels are okay, but injury or inffectiveness could spell doom for their chances. Lurking in the weeds are the Toronto Blue Jays. While their offense isn’t quite up to par with the other teams, they have somethingthatnoneoftheothersquads have. Pitching depth. The Jays have seven players (Roger Clemens, Pat Hentgen, Juan Guzman, Erik Hanson, Woody Williams, Robert Person, Chris

Carpenter) on their roster who could start, plus a host of youngsters who arc almost ready to take that step. Last year, with an abysmal offense, and unreliable bullpen, the Jays managed to win 76 games. This year, with a little luck and the proper development of their young players, they should push the Yankees and Orioles for the West crown. The other major surprise team could be the Detroit Tigers. Just two seasons removed from being the worst team in the majors, the Tigers have pieced together a solid starting lineup highlighted by young stars Bobby Higginson, Tony Clark, and Brian Hunter. All they lack are proven major league arms to get the job drop. A couple of good trades to bring in pitching talent and the Tigers could contend with the Indians for the Central crown. Which brings us to the pretenders. Teams like the Rangers, Red Sox, and White Sox are also going to suffer the ill-effects of poor pitching. The Red Sox shelled out $12 million a year to get Pedro Martinez, but would have been better served picking up a pair of $6 million pitchers. There are, after all, a surprisingly high number of them out there. The Rangers have no pitching save for ail-world closer John Wetteland and the White Sox have absolutely nothing. Nada. The American League’s bottom feeders will call Minnesota, Kansas City, Oakland, and the expansion area of Tampa Bay home in 1998. Minnesota and Kansas City are having cash problems and Oakland is just a bad team. However, they do boast two of the top prospects in the game in shortstop Miguel Tejada and outfielder Ben Grieve. They have no pitching though, and as we’ve figured out previously, pitching is what’s going to ultimately win the day. Tampa Bay is an expansion team, so let’s just allow them to lose in peace. In what can only be described as a strong morale gesture, several members of the expansion Tampa Bay Devil Rays

Predictions AL EAST New York Yankees Toronto Blue Jays Baltimore Orioles Boston Red Sox Tampa Bay Devil Rays Most

Valuable Ken Criffey

Cy Young Andy

AL CENTRAL Cleveland Indians Detroit Tigers Chicago White Sox Kansas City Royals Minnesota Twins

93-69 89-73 87-75 81-81 68-94

AL WEST Anaheim Angels Seattle Mariners Texas Rangers Oakland A’s

90-72 8577 79-83 72-90 M-96

Player Jr. Award

Pettitte

have bonus clauses written into their contracts entitling them to a cash reward if the Rays win the World Series in their innaugural year. At least their hearts are in the right place. When the dust is settled, it is our bold prediction that the Anaheim Angels will reign supreme in the American League, finally putting to rest a legacy of loserdom that has hovered over the team for decades. But what more people may perhaps care more about is whether Roger Maris’ time-hon-

98-64 88-74 73-89 65-97

Rookie of the Year Ben Grieve Manager Tim oured home-run record will fall. Going on the safe assumption that Ken Griffey Jr. can’t put together two injury-free seasons, it’s not likely that an American League player will break the mark. Griffey will probably miss a couple dozen games with various injuries, and none of the other sluggers in the league have the right combination of overwhelming power and a hitter-friendly ballpark like Seattle’s Kingdome to call home. Albert Belle is too inconsistent and Comiskey Park tends towards pitchers; Juan Gonzalez might hit

of the Year Johnson

50 in a career year; Frank Thomas doesn’t try to hit homers, and like Gonzalez, won’t break SO too often in his career. And, toclose on a happy note, still no collective bargaining agreement. Rut then again, this is baseball. Yay for baseball!

L?idyou know... Chuck Knoblauch’s last name, translated from German, means garlic. Goeswell with Chili Davis.

IMPIillNT,

Friday,

March

13,

1998

BASEBAL.L

‘98

.Baseball ‘98team:by=team breakdow AL

EAST

New York Yankees Manager: Joe Torre 1997 record: 96-66 Hi: 2B Clwck KnQbiu#d (Twins), DH cm Duvis (Royuh}, 3B Scm Brusius (A ‘s) Bye: 3B Wude Bugs (L&vii Rays), DH Cecil F&fw (AngeIs), DH Mike Stunlty (Bhhys), P Dwight Gooden (Ipldiuns) Prognosis: Offensively stacked, it all

The Franchise: Pedro Martinez-The Green Monster and the DH will cause his numbers to rise a bit, but he’ll prove to be worth every penny. Prognosis; They paid a lot of money for a great player, but alientated MO Vaughn, the best offensive player they’ve got. If they lose him after this season, rename the team Dead Sox. Tom Gordon--Ok, no one Breakthrough:

and for many, many years. Freefall: Pitching-Young arms are on their way, but for starter Justin Thompson and closer Todd Jones, there’s nothing else to rely on. Chicago White Sox Manager: Jerry Manuel 1997 record: 80-81

they’d be a world series threat. Thanks to their Disney owners, they have the cash to do it. The Franchise: Tim Salmon-The power source in a very potent line-up, he’ll have ample opportunity to drive in a lot of runs. Breakthrough: Darin Erstad-Hitting and fielding out of place, but put up good numbers as a rook and is going to get a whole lot better. Freefall: Cecil Fielder-The monster pro-

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P Frunk fk __::,I~~~~~~~~~r~~~~~~~~~s), :_::.a~:. :::.:. .:.::::: .:..y:..,: :y:.:.: I:.: i: ...~. .:.:::.::: ..LL-.. _.&...A. ...:.:.‘.‘:.‘.‘:‘,.. .<.... ....: . . past. . : . . . : Cmtil& psJck#rj Freefall: Cal Ripken Jr.-His production is slipping, and these days his body can’t take 162 games without showing it. Would Prognosis: Some shrewd dealing by GM be better served to play only 120 games or Randy Smith has assembled a talented and so in the field, but that’11 never happen. young team that will improve when some of their pitching prospects make it to the He’s Mr. Oriole, remember. show. Up and coming, but not quite there. The Franchise: Bobby Higginson-A Boston Red Sox Manager: Jimy Williams classic throwback player, his onfy wc;ak1997 record: 78-84 ness is that there’s only one of him. Breakthrough: Juan Encarnacion-He’s Hi: P Pedro Madmz (Expus~, P Demis young, but so talented. He will be the E.&et-shy (Cmdinals~ starter in left field sometime this season, Bye: P Aaron Sde (Rmzger-), P Jeff Stippan

to improve

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multi-tool player who can only get better. Breakthrough: Jose Rosado-Shown signs of brilliance and fallacy. He’s a pitcher in the truest sense, and knows how to get batters out. Freefall: Jeff Canine-His pat speed is slipping, and that’s the death knell for a contact hitter like Conine. The end is high.

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Minnesota Twins Manager: Tom Kelly 1997 record: 68-94 Hi: OF Otis Nixon (Dodgers), OF Orlando Mend (Hue Jars) Bye: ZB Chuck Knublau~h (Yankees), OF Rich Becker (Mets) Prognosis: Not good. Poor pitching, no money to improve, the possibility of relocation, losing their best player, it all comes down to a bad team that can only get worse. The Franchise: Brad Radke-Put it al1 together last year to win 20 games, he’ll be hard pressed to do it again. If he doesn’t, no one will. Breakthrough: David Ortiz-Can bang the ball out of the park at will, and hit for average. All he needs is a chance, which the Twins would be stupid not to give him. Freefall: Terry Steinbach-Offensive numbers plummeted back to Earth after a surreal 1996 season. WEST

Anaheim Angels Manager: Terry Collins 1997 record: 84-78 Hi: DH Cecil Fielder (Yankees) Bye: OF Rickey Hendenma (A ‘s), ZB Luh Ahw (Rungtnj, P Murk Langstun (Padres), DH Thy Phii%& (Pnb?) Prognosis: A superb offensive lineup with quality pitching and a top-notch closer, if they could pick up a high-calibre starter,

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Breakthrough: FernandoTatis4j&&&~ .,... ,..,. . . . .. : the third base job, he’ll post decen&$~~~ numbers and a few stolen bases to@&&? . . .. 1 Freefall: Starting pitching-Aside ‘$&$ Darren Oliver, jt’s bleak. Bleaker tha~~~~~ Texas ments

prairie. Don’t look for any imp&$ though, unless someone step&&&$ :‘r. .. .‘..::. y.::: ‘~:...:.. ..‘.c;;‘:.. .L... .’..>>::;.:. ,:..:,‘,” .x..i., _c.. i,. :.:: .?. :.:.: j:: :.:. ..:.; ..$:‘. ::: _.__ :.:.,_-L. Oakland Athletics :.:::;..:;..>: .:’.:.:.i:.;I..._. Manager: Art HoWe ,_I::.‘:; y’s.‘i<: .C.... 1997 record: 65-97 ,,; y, .‘~f:~~~.‘;~~~~t Hi: OF R&y Henderson (Ang~~~t-~~~~~y _..I:,:.:.:... >,. .:... Rugm (Yan~~:~~~~-~~~~~~~~~~~~p .I. 8; .2 .. .;.,::::;::.;:;; :,;:;.-.., :.‘:.: ::.-....‘. .. Tupn &&&$;f~~] .;.j;‘:., ,i~~s~l~~~:;‘iii:~~~iil .,)TV:. :::. .:~:,:,::.:.:::< : :..:: .:::,:;,:: Bye: OF J~~~~..~~~~~~~~~‘~~~~~ny .. :....: . _‘,:‘. _,.:_,_._ _:.. ,..,,..,._.,._ ..:~:~~~~~~~~~ ..,:.~:_. : ::.:::::i.::.: . ...,. (In _ BQ$is& (&&&&&&&#~ .::,.: :(:i:::.: ,.:::,..:.....:_.,_,. ._:. .Z.‘.> _.:I_.,.,., .. :#:.::i..:...,:.._:c :‘::::yyg$y;y I.1:.. _,.._. ;~:‘. ,._...,., diuns) :,:....:. .~:,:‘:“;“. :,~.““::“:” y::yz ..:.:<,.;y . :,:;I ‘I’:: :;::.::jci~~~ii::,~,~~~~,:~~:~.. ::.. ..‘.:.:.:..,. .,:.:,:,,,: ,:,.;.;. ,.:.: ;;.;;:;;;;y<y<>..‘,. .,., : .,. . .....>.C” Prognosis: Alotofyoung kids who will get a chance in this rebuilding phase, so don’t expect a lot of wins. Pitching is still really poor, but better with proven starters in Rogers and Candiotti. The Franchise: Ben Grieve-Baseball’s top prospect, he’ll step into Mark M&wire’s shoes as the A’s star. And he’11 produce: count on it. Breakthrough: Ben Grieve-‘Cuz if he doesn’t, no one else is gonna. Freefall: Rickey Hendersonxan run, can walk, can be selfish, but can’t hit.

SPORTS

IMPRINT,

Friday,

March

13, 1998

STUDENT HOUSING

by Michelle Robinson Campus Recreation

sublets (l-4 bedrooms) e residence rooms (meal

Co-ret

Sports

Report

plan mandatory) l

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leases available

CONTACTS

(SINGLE PAIR)

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This year’ Campus Recreation started a co-ret= basketball league. It has been a great success. This term 12 teams signed up for co-ret league, with six in the Advanced division and six in the intermediate division. Seven of these teams are from the student residences. In this league there are no officials and no standings; players play for the fun of the game. Special recognition goes to the team from North B: these players have a great attitude and enthusiasm which is highly contagious. Thanks to all of the teams for their spirit and fun. You are the true spirit of Campus Recreation. Thank you to Lindy Loh for her work in the league. Another Co-ret league going strong is the Co-ret Indoor Soccer league. Halfway through the Indoor Soccer season, the 17 advanced and seven intermediate teams make the trek out to the CRC for their games each Sunday. This term teams from around the campus, including teams from East and South in village, St. Jerome’s and Management Sciences Student Association, have jumped into the fun of Indoor Soccer. Thanks to all of the teams for their exempIary sportsmanship (even -with the stress of school). Keep up the good fun. Thanks again to Lindy for her work in the Co-ret Indoor Soccer League. And

Co-ret volleyball was also a great success this term. There were 51 teams registered for this fun volleyball league. The 36 experienced and I5 inexperienced teams were busy bumping, setting and spiking their way to lots of fun and laughter. AI1 in all, the co-ret sports leagues were a great success, and everyone had a great time. So, if you are looking for some fun next term, spread the word that co-ret sports are where the fun is. Enjoy the rest of the term, and good luck on your exams! Jugglers aim for the sky by Robert Berks Free entertainment! You can’t ask for much more than that. Yet, on March 21 and 22, the UW juggling club does it again, holding its sixth annual juggling fest; the biggest, best, and oniy juggling fest in Ontario. The action begins in the SLC 1O:OO a.m. Saturday, and concludes Sunday afternoon. A free public show of local and imported talent begins Saturday, 8:OO p.m. in the SLC Great Hall. JuggIers will invade Waterloo from all over Ontario and nearby states of the U.S. to demonstrate and learn new skills, to play juggling games, and to so-

cialize. True Canadian Balls will also be there, selIing quality juggling equipment. You don’t need to be a juggler to take part, though. (We’ll even bribe you with a free ticket for our prize draw just for registering. See, it is even better than free!) Beginners are welcome to try their hand with balls, diabolo, clubs, unicycle, etc. (Sorry, there . will be no chainsaws or circus cIowns. You’ll need to attend Stereotypes 101 for those). There will be friendly experts on hand to heIp you. Or just drop by and laugh at your friends. Throughout Saturday we will organize the tutorial workshops and juggling games. The honour of Waterloo is on the line, as UWO have promised to deal us a “crushing blow” at juggling combat. You can come and help UW quash this laughable challenge. Confirmed talent for the Saturday show are London artiste Cam Fleming and weII-known busking legend Indiana Bob. Local talent will be led by the unmatched technical skill ofSteve Holditch, the most gifted ball juggler in Ontario, if not all of Canada. And remember, it’s all free! More information on this event can be found at http:// mercator.uwaterloo.ca/ -mgacrawf/juggle/juggIe.htmI

Leadersof the Week

now, a word from Graham Sams

Another great term of Co-ret sports is sadly about to come to an end. The Winter 1998 term has proven once again that co-ret sports are a great way to get togetherwith some friends and have some fun. One of the participants summed up co-ret sports as “the perfect way to relieve your mind of school work and enjoy yourself.” The Innertube Waterpolo Soccer League was great this term. Sixteen teams participated, with eight teams from on-campus residences. The ten experienced and six inexperienced teams had a great time, and had a few laughs as they awkwardly splashed around on their tubes. If you were at Columbia Icefields on a Saturday afternoon this term, you probably saw teams from the co-ret Broomball Leagues attempting to run on ice. The league had a great turnout of 26 teams. The 12 experienced and 14 inexperienced teams enjoyed the friendIy competition, even in the late time slots.

Mike Felzcak has worked for the Campus Ret soccer program for two terms. Last term Mike worked as a referee for the competitive soccer league. He refereed 33 games in one term. This term Mike has shown high commitment to the Indoor Soccer program. He fills in for other referees when needed, and he has-made a strong effort to learn the rules of indoor soccer. Campus Ret would like to thank Mike for his outstanding contribution to the Indoor &ccer program.

Darren Becks is truly one of the strongest leaders in the competitive leagues program.. Darren is senior referee with Campus Recreation, has officiated 198 games in Ball Hockey, and served as Assistant Referee-in-Chief in Spring 1997, Fall 1997 and Winter 1998. Darren is one of the most active referees in the program, often covering for other refs when needed. Darren also helps out by teaching the rookie referees and participating in the Conduct Advisory Committee.

IMPRINT,

Friday,

March

SPORTS

13, 1998

Athletes of the week SUMMER SUBliiS AMAIlABlE tiARTlN6 MAY 181 F--

In ordertoviewa unitcallDan@88&7093 173KingStreet * North,CornerofKing& EzraStreets

-FutlytxmtrolJecl~withiptercomsys -secufedbjcycle~area. -EtibcdroompvidedwithQarlocksetfoa~. -Telqbj&heachbedrocwl 4fhJnkwobol) -R~tu6radyr3rholsut~~ibI

-Ampleclosctaodstofagespace. -Lalmdryfacility. -hw-lndwrdr -MOW

LEASINGRATESASLOWAS$15O.@OPERMONT Mike Zavershnik .Warrior Basketball Asecond year Economics student from Toronto, Ontario, Zavershnik was key in the Warriors’ upset victories over Western and McMaster this weekend. Scoring nine points and collectingsix rebounds against the Mustangs, Zavershnik saved the biggest game of his career for the Wild West Championship Saturday afternoon. Against the Marauders, Zavershnik collected 15 points and a team high seven rebounds as Waterloo crushed n/lcMaster,

Heather Moyse Athena Track A second year Kinesiology student from Summerside, PEI, Moyse helped lead the Athenas to their fifth place finish at the OUA Championships in York this weekend, Moyse captured bronze medals in the 60 and 300 metres with times of 7.67 and 39.75 respectively. She also captured a bronze in the 4 x 400 and a fourth place finish in the 4 x 200 metres.

*Windsor

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this weekend.

Hey All-stars! If you were an all-star at tht

Getcloserto completingyour degreeandenjoythe Brock experiencewhileworkingin Niagara. Asa universitystudentyouniayattendBrockUniversityon a 4 Letterof Permission. 4 It’s easy.‘Simply arrangeto havea Letterof .Permission (issuedbyyour currentuniversity)sentto our Registrar’sOffice. 4 Discoverthe manynewlearningopportunitiesat Brock University! AbAA44

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DISCOVERWHATBROCKCANDOFORYOU! .

Brock University

SPORTS

Off the Wall by Craig Hickie Imprint staff

he UW boulder& wall was finally unveiled in the PAC this term. The conversion of one of the squash courts into a zone of spider antics has been four years in the making. Four years of planning that is. The actual building of the Wall-Stage 1 took less than two days, and would have been only one day if not for a minor construction glitch. The creation of a wall on campus was the brainchild of Chris McRaild back in 1994. Kept alive by Karsten Verbeurgt of the Outers Club, and Campus Ret, it took time to find a place for the wall to go. CR finally donated the space through the insight of Judy McCrae and Bill Cook. So what is a bouldering wall anyway you may ask? And why should you care? There is a difference between a climbing wall and a bouldering wall. Climbing requires a lot of technique and rope work, harnesses, a belay partner, knot tying, and a lot of other safety requirements. This is so you can get up thirty or forty feet. The beauty of bouldering is that you can forego 311 of that and focus on body conditioning and body movement skills, doing without al1 the equipment and rope work. This is because you are only ten feet up max. People climb for many reasons. These reasons include fitness, mental escape, competition, fun and to impress potential mates. WalI users say that they enjoy the focus and

IMPRINT,

Friday, March 13, 1998

Outers Club Style

intensity that they get while challenging themselves to outdo previous moves they’ve made; its like a game of physical chess. The purpose of an indoor bouldering wall is to have a place to condition yourself and train prior to getting out in the big outdoors where you will be climbing. Of course bouldering is a sport that can be done outdoors too, and there are large competitive gatherings where you can challenge routes and gain points for your successful ascents (known as topping out, or solving the bouldering problem). These events use routes that are typically no more than fifteen feet off the ground. As a sport bouldering is not as old as climbing. Climbing is usually about big walls, big peaks, major routes, altitude. Bouldering has a much tighter focus and deals with narrow problems: how to get up that ten feet of overhanging wall. Solving the problem may take a boulderer hundreds of tries. In the fifties and sixties there were a few dominant personalities who spent their days solving short pitches. Others thought they were crazy loners, wasting their time on little unglamorous rocks when all those peaks and major faces were the proper goal. The persistence of a few masters who could put spiderman to shame created the sport of bouldering. Here are a few facts about the UW Bouldering Wall: There are two sides, a vertical wall and an overhanging wall. The variety of holds mounted on the walls form

It’s like Cf@m~ger without the mountain, or the height, or the danger, or Stallone. Wait, is that really a bad thing? photo by Niels Jensen

Club Abstract a margarita Mexican

introduces

MARGARITA

MONDAYS.

Drop by for

by the pitcher or the glass. Tequila shooters

will be at

prices for those who dare. And there are other specials we just aren’t

allowed to tell you about.

The weekend

isn’t Over yet baby.

I CLUB

Dpenmon and thurs to sot 9pm - 2om

667 king streetw kitchener 571-9032

many routes varying from easy to difficult. Users can approach their climb from many viewpoints, but the indoor environment is a great place to socialize and learn from other climbers. A popular game is forming a route across the surface from moves devised by the players. Take it in turns to add one more move, and each player tries to outdo theothers. People mark their difficult routes with tape, numbering hand holds in sequence for others to try and repeat. Movement is not limited to vertical: you can move across, up, down, in any way that feels good. Holds will be moved around about once a month or so and the Club has a collection of different types that will be interchanged. Please don’t wear street shoes into the court, but note that specialized climbing boots are not required. In fact regular tennis shoes are the best. Note that the flatter and thinner your shoes’ soles the better. You want your toes as close to actual climbing surface as possible and thickly soled joggers or shoes with flaring edges will spoil your feel and prevent advanced moves. Thick matting protects you from a fall. The mat is layered to both cushion sharp impact and protect against a flat on your back type fall. The maximum height of the wall is ten feet so you can’t hurt yourself badly in there. There are plans to expand the climable area but the wall won’t become higher. Expect to see a bauldering cave for the

Wall-stage 2 (next year hopefully). The cave will overhang with a height from four to ten feet and allow you to climb on its ceiling. Such inverted climbing will work out different muscles and improve your strength and skill dramatically. The types of holds used on ceilings are a bit different, involving palm grips and small cracks where you must wedge your hand or fist. To become a Bouldering Wail member will cost you $15 for a term plus $7 to join the UW Outers Club. Comparing this to other walls, you are getting a great deal. Typical rates range from $140 to $170 for four months or $10 to $15 for one day of climbing. So ifyou use the UW Bouldering Wail twice a week thru the term you are paying only 70 cents per climb. That is a sweet deal. Most climbers learn by joining small local clubs and learning one on one from other experienced climbers. There is a sort of apprenticeship approach to all this although you can learn the basics from clinics or sessions at stores with climbing walls orwith trainersatanoutdoorsetting. Watch the Campus Ret catalogue for bouldering clinics being offered next term here at UW. Contact the UW Outers Club for more info including

Wall poli&es

and procedures

access information: wlmem 1.uwu&e~~u0.cu:80/- uu fen For newsgroup see: uw.ou fers.boulnering-wull Other bouldering sites, E-zines: www.buu/den’ng.cotn www.climbing.com

and

LMPRINT,

Friday,

March

SPORTS

13, 1998

Los charioios de1fuego Good outcome at the OUA Championships

K-W, CAMBRIDGE

photo

by John Lofranco speciaJ to Imprint

he Waterloo Track and Field team had some excellent results this weekend at the 0uA championships proving, to paraphrase a friend, that if they were bear fighters, they wouldn’t quit. The women finished fifth overall, and the men came ninth, though only six points away from sixth place. The star of the show was once again second year standout and perennial athlete of the week Heather Moyse. Heather competed seven times over the course of two days, coming away with five personal bests,

by John Lofranco;

other bronze medal, her time a personal best 39.75. Less than an hour later she anchored the 4x40Om relay team to a comefrom-behind bronze medal win, with a personal best time of 57.0 seconds. Allison Salter, Blanka Sharma and Lynn Coon, who PBed as well in 59.8, helped the team to a season best 358.3 1. That time qualifies the girls for a trip to Windsor this weekend. We shouldn’t forget that Heather was only two centimetres off her varsity record in the Triple Jump where, due to injury (oh yeah, she was in pain virtually all weekend), she ended up eighth, only completing her first three jumps.

Waterloo leaves others in dust TRACK three bronze medals and four CIAU berths. Heather’s PBS represented almost one fifth of the team’s 26 on the day. Head coach Brent MacFarlane said that total represents a “Great response to competition at the provincial level.” The team has a total of 135’ personal bests on the year so far, with the National Championship meet to come, this weekend in Windsor. Heather Moyse started off the competition with a personal best leading the 4xZOOm team of Jill Bennett, Allison Salter and Alison Brazier to a fourth place finish, and likely a spot at CIs. Heather’s next feat was in the 60m on Friday night, where she ran consecutive PBS of 7.67 and 7.66 in the heats and semis. She finished it off with another 7.67 in the final on Saturday to win the bronze medal. Also on Saturday afternoon, Heather won her heat of the 300m with the fourth fastest time posted in Cariada at that time. After the last heat, she ended up with an-

All Heather’s exploits aside, the women’s team had a phenomenal day, with Jill Bennett taking a bronze medal in the 60m hurdles and qualifying for the CIAUs as well. Jill also had a PB of 7.93 in the 60m, where she pulled off a tdp ten finish, Shauna Ellis PBed in the 1OOOm (3:09.63), as did Ellen Schappert (227.3) in her leg of the 4x800m. That team ran a season’s best time of 9:36.94 to finish sixth in Ontario. On the men’s side, Kwame Smart broke through, setting two PBS, one in the 60m, a terrific time of 7.19 which placed hiti eleventh, and in the 300m an excellent PB of 37.78. Kwame has been plagued by injury all season, but this weekend he bore the pain and cam? through with some great performances. Bill Miller and Richard Sibley will be representing Waterloo at the National Championships in the Pole Vault; Bill was fifth this weekend with a vault of 4,65. Cliff Johnson had three great PBS, in the 4x800, 4x400 and in

jensenization

622-7774 (acTosshMcDrauldP) 4% GtJET.&Ws LARGEST f%ECTIOIU

Attention

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the 6OOm (1:25.73). In the 4X800, Cliff broke the magic two minute barrier for the first time, handing off in 159.8. He gave the baton to Stephan Drew who also had a PB in 201.7. Pierre Labreque’s third leg was a PB for him as well, also going sub-two with a 1:58.2, the fastest on the team. John Lofranco ran the last leg, maintaining the team’s seventh place position, and ending off the best race of the year for this team; they ran a combined 8:OS.K Cliffs other PB came in the 4X400m, which saw inspired runs by all team members. An injured Greg MacDougal led off in 52.9; he handed off to rookie Pierre Labreque who ran a personal best 5 1.2. Jimmie Petrie’s third leg was for me the most inspiring of the day; Jimmie ran his heart out and was rewarded with a huge personal best of 5 1.0. Cliff’s 51.6 closed out the race, and put the team 6th. There is a good chance that the team will run again this weekend in Windsor. Also running personal bests were Alex Rogers and Jason Dockendorff in the 4X200m. They contributed to a team PB as well. Jimmie Petrie had a PI3 in the 60m hurdles and, finished tenth in that event. Coach Brent had this to say about the weekend “Outstanding team effort from both men and women. With only nine women, placing fifth is remarkable.” Six of these remarkable women, along with the Pole Vaulters and the men’s 4X400m team, will be representing our school at the CIAU Championships in Windsor today and tommorow. Good luck to the UW team, and also thanks to trainer Larissa Sproule, ,distance coach Jason Gregoire, coach and administrator Tim Mussar, and of course head coach Brent MacFarlane for their outstanding contribution to the team.

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*The phoenix rises again The hoenix fes ii‘vail998

art

aznapw i2?M?B Tuesday,

March

Mike Downing special to Imprint

rt is a thing as hard to define as God or love. “1 paint so that I don’t have to drink,” an artist once told me. We all remember times as kids when we drew pictures in food, in sand, or imaginary ones in the air. Then one day we discovered neat things like crayons, ‘pencils, and markers. Usually someone would discover paper for us soon after because walls and plates just wouldn’t do. Those pictures we drew for no real reason, except for the feelings that came out while doing it, the feeling of being lost in something, enthralled by a product of our own invention. Also, there was the satisfaction of having it done and knowing that somehow, someway, it came from inside of you and it was yours in a way that was special. Later some of us discovered that words could do pretty much the same thing: capture something that was inside. Sometimes it was a thing that you

didn’t even know was there, Yeah, at one point or another we all drew pictures and we all scribbled a poem or two. Whether or not we liked it, whether we thought it was good or not, it told us something about ourselves, Some of us were forced to learn instruments when we were young. Piano lessons are the most popular torture tools employed by parents in the Western world. But one day you didn’t play what was written, one day you improvised and played what you felt. One day you might have heard a song that made you cry or saw a movie that made you laugh or read a book that made you angry. To me that is what art is all about. It’s about emotion: laughing, crying and being moved when you least expect it. Caring when you’re not really wanting to. I’m in my living room and I’m staring across the room at”a 3 feet by 2 I/ 2 foot painting of me, The more I stare the more I see of me. It’s not a laboriously done Polaroid. It’s art. It’s an impression. My soul on canvas. What I’m trying to get at is& @&nix group. Twenty students who got together to produce a book and an art show of heroic proportions. The book has been

around, some of you may even have heard of thephoenix. What’s different is that instead of an inbred, low key, phantom Fed publication, this year the goal was to expose real art. Full color pictures, published authors, East Campus Hall, St. Jeromes, Grebel; the full nine. &pho&xis about art. Real art. Whatever that is. That’s why there are so many of us. The goal is not to tell you what real art is but to help you develop your own aesthetic. Because art is all about experience. Artists spend their lives communicating their experiences. There are many such people at UW. Many artists, Many folks who spend their time documenting memories, dreams, reflections: experiences and emotions. The emotions rhey evoke tell us about us. %?ph~nix 19% tells about &XV. It puts you in touch with those real artists. The phoenix art show on Tuesday, 17 (St. Paddy’s Day) is all about

The Mighty Mighty kbsstones Fitthration Hall Saturday, by

by David Winn

March

Darq4 Kelman Imprint

photo

Jonkman, Chris l-Ii11 all step up and represent. Grebel, St. Paul’s, Renison, Jeromes, you’re all too far away. Engineers write. English students write. Economic students write. Stories, poems, tales, essays, it’s a11 legit. Step up and represent yourselves. That’s what Tuesday 17, in the Campus Center is all about. It’s all about letting you know that it’s okay to do those things you did as a kid. To do art. It’s more than okay it’s necessary. It’s essential. I’m Mike D., FEDS’ art cgmmissioner, and my word is bond. So hear me well: art has arrived at UW and I’ll keep it here. mphontti 1998 is a celebration. One that will returo bigger and better. So if you ever cried at a film, wowed att a painting, or smiled because of a poem, come. Ifyou’re a painter, photographer, writer, sculptor, or lover of art, come. Represent. Let everyone know who you are. So next time, the pbmh can represent you too.

Fed Hall goes ska w/The Pietasters

“Portrait” by Norma Graham, one of the works showcased in the phoenix.

them too. 120 submissions. 60 pages. Eight hours of hanging art, music and readings. I’m sitting across from the guy who painted that portrait in my living room. We’re at Williams. His name is Christian but I call him Chachee. He’s talking about art. He’s talking about Che Guevera revolutionaries. Bourgeoisie and Proletariat. About representing with realness and what he’s ail about. Mike Harris is out there talking about how worthless art and artists are. I wonder what he does when he goes home; does he own CDs, watch movies, or read books? He probably does. There are probably things his left brain can’t fathom. What does he do then? I think people like Chach represent even in his universe. That’s what tlae phoenix is about: representation. East Campus hall is too far away. Step up and represent. Barry Lorne, Tricia Piche, Linda

staf!f

s the streams of people made their way into Fed Hall, the increasing buzz of anticipation and the increasing number of patrons in suits indicated that the fans were ready-to get down. Washington DC. septet The Pietasters hit the stage first and immediately showed that they could share the stage with the powerhouses of their genre like Goldfinger, MxPx, and of course, the Bosstones. Their set was solid both musically and technically and it was clear that they found some new fans up here in the north. As good as they were though, it was the Mighty ones that everyone was waiting for. With their recycling bin full of cold Heineken to distribute to the crowd, the Bosstones took the stage to “Live and Let Die” and instantly got the crowd jumping to their brand of ska beatts and distorted guitars. Bottles were opened and the sweat flowed, both on and off stage, as they aggressively ripped through material from their sixth and newest release Let’s Face I,,

making sure to play the hits “Royal Oil, ” “The Rascal King,” and “The Impression I Get.” Energetic front man Dicky Barrett, shedding clothes as the set progressed, called upon the mob at the front of the stage to sing along on more than one occasion. As the crowd surged against the railing, a few of the luckier skacore fans surfed their way up on stage for a moment of fame

ter time as the night progressed, a fact not hurt by the courtesy booze. Switching quickly from “Last Dead Mouse” to “Where’d Ya Go?“, a couple older tunes, the Bosstones managed to please long-time and newer fans alike. Both bands had tight sounds and were into putting on a good performance. The crowd received them well and had a really good time. The only drawback to the entire evening was the sound

screams the Dicky. photo

before getting hurled back into the frenzied mass. The temperature rising with the energy, both the band and the fans appeared to be having a bet-

by MAti Fddman

quality, which at times deprived many of the listeners’ ears the sweet sounds of the brass. Other than that setback, it was a brilliant show all around.

IMPRINT,

ARTS

Friday, March 13, 1998

-A shrewdly entertaining evening UW Drama’s The Taming of the Shrew 77&zm?oftheArts

March

11 - March

by Todd Pettigrew special to Imprint

of the play, in which she proclaims the virtues of womanly obedience to her master, has aroused controversy and uneasiness whenever it is produced. Audience members in UW’s Theatre of the Arts have much to admire even before the house lights dim; William Chesney’s set

play’s existing induction and replaced it with an inane prologue in which a stubborn restaurant owner reluctantly allows a troupe of actors to perform for their supper. To make matters worse, Giovanna (Claudine Albriesh who speaks in modern English and uninteresting modern English at

ogether withTkeM&&znt uf Venice, The Taming of the Sham stands as Shakespeare’s most difficult yet fascinating play. Its difficulty emerges from the play’s blatant sexism, its fascination from the fact that we can never be sure to what extent that sexism is being ironically undermined. This fascination; it seems, has led UW Drama to mount another production of the Shakespeare play,.. and director Lloy Coutts’ version confronts its challenges with some measure of success -- but qn1y some. The play tells the story of Petruchio, a gentleman of Verona bound to find a rich wife. He finds that wife in Kate, the bitter, daughter of acid-tongued Baptista. Petruchio sets out to tame his vicious bride with a program that combines starvation with sleep-deprivation. With Kate married, Baptista allows his younger daughter to marry, and much of the play follows her various suitors and their attempts to marry Bianca who is as sweet as Kate is sour. Traditionally Kate’s speech to other wives at the end

Petruchio, for all his romantic charm, is not a regularScopeuser. photo

is superb. A broad mezzanine above broad steps, Chesney’s set is elegant and expansive, and one is made ready for an equally judicious performance. The play begins, however, with a decidedly disappointing surprise. In the long and inglorious tradition of correcting Shakespeare, Coutts has cut out the

by NeBs Jensen

that) remains onstage for the whole of the play, babbling periodically. At one point, she complains that the names are too similar and she needs a review. Other times she dabs at her eyes to remind us to be sad and, worst of all, ends the play be reminding us that the play might just be a little more complicated than it seems

times, and a domineering sergeant-major when he knows he can get away with it. Grumio’s duel with an overbearing dressmaker -- walking stick vs folded fan -- is delightful. Jonathan C. Dietrich (inexplicably undercas t as the Pedant) similarly makes much of his limited stage tim,:, moving from pretentious businessman to plastered bozo with easy comic dexterity. Other talented actors seem to struggle at times to find their places in the play. Cyrus Lane is impressive as Tranio but never seems never to realize that he is only &&,sed as Lucentio. We are made to forget his deception which, in turn, allows us to forget just how important deception is to the play. Sean Vivian’s Grumio has some excellent moments, but occasionally Vivian seems to be reciting his lines. Misha Rybalov has had to fall back on a tired stereotype; his Hortensio is pure caricature: a whining high school geek in big glasses. At times one senses that this is a cast adrift, guided only by a director who thinks that “there’s a whole bunch of really cool people out there” is suitable dialogue for a Shakespeare play.

and making sure we all go home confident that Kate really wasn’t so bad in the first place, and maybe not so well-tamed at the end. But any production ofZ4rm relies of course on the strength of its tamer and its supposed tamee. Norm Friend is amiable as Petruchio. Friend’s boyish charm and equally boyish good looks serve him well, and his energy is Aine Magennis is unflagging. similarly energetic, but Kate’% shrewish phase shows too little complexity and verges on tiresome. Magennis clearly has more to offer in the first two-thirds of the show, but Coutts has her mostly shrieking, as if to be shrewish simply meant never lowering one’s voice. When Magennis is finally permitted more room to move, as the playclearlydemands, her Kate becomes infinitely more interesting. She faces the terribly difficult closing speech with admirable dignity and confidence. Indeed there is much to enjoy in UW’s S,&rz~. Bart Cormier plays a genuinely comic Grumio, fully realizing the potential of this minor character, and gives the play a much-needed boost. Cormier’s Grumio is a scraping toady at-the right times, a witty jester at other

A ni ht of Canadian rawk CanaF ian Music Week ldcl~soff in Toronto by Paul McQuigge special to Imprint

good music festival is like a good buffet: there’s lots of choice and decisions that can be made by your taste and feelings. The Saturday night lineup of the Canadian Music Week satisfied all my musical cravings. The first stop on the musical tour was 7 p.m. at the Phoenix where Post 76 played a 40 minute set well received by a tiny crowd. Ron Sexsmith was up next with the first surprise of the evening. Sexsmith was accompanied by the Rheostatics rhythm section, Tim VeseIy on bass, and Don Kerr on drums. Sexsmith’s show was the highlight of the night. After three songs Sexsmith spotted Kurt Swinghammer in the crowd and called him up on stage. It was definitely spontaneous since Swinghammer borrowed a pick from Tim Vesely. The addition of another electric guitar added to the musical depth of the band. Sexsmith pulled material from his two albums and performed the best cover song I’ve heard in a while, Abba’s “ Knowing Me, Knowing You.” After the Phoenix shut down at 9:30, accommodating a disco

dance, we headed to C’est What for Roger Hodgson’s set. We were informed at the door that due to huge interest in seeing the former Supertramp leader they had sold advance tickets voiding our allaccess-pass. Oh well, who wanted to see an old geezer anyway. So we stood on Front Street and flipped a coin. Heads was the Matthew Good Band and Big Sugar at Lee’s and tails was Copyright and treblechargerat Reverb. Tails won so we headed to Queen Street. As we entered the Reverb we were greeted by a wall of sound that was being produced by Winnipeg’s Transistor Sound and Lighting Company. I only caught about ten minutes of their set but I really enjoyed what I saw. It is best described as explosive shoegazer music-picture Sonic Youth playing Ride songs. Copyright roared and wiggled through six songs in 45 minutes and called up Queen Street staple Anne Bourne to play cello

during one song, The 45 minute set made me regret the fact that I had skipped them so many times. Later the packed crowd was entertained by treblecharger whose pop hook laden set finished off the evening. treblecharger chugged through 12 songs in an hour including their hits “red” and “friend of mine”. During the encore they referred to their tour with The Foo Fighters as the best thing that happened to them in their six year career and saluted the Foos by covering “Everlong” . On the way back to the car, we popped into the packed Horseshoe Tavern where an alternative-country show was winding down in front of an enthusiastic crowd. Saturday night filled all the requirements of a good music festival. There was a wide variety of good music with a few surprises and it proved that Canadian music is alive and ready to roar into the next century.

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ARTS

IMPRINT,

Friday,

March

13, 1998

A dark time in the old town tonight Dark

City

Fuimy

Csnana

directed by Alex Proyas by Rachel Imptint

E. Beattie staff

ave you ever wondered if your life is really real? When you wake up in the morning how can you be sure your memories are real and that you have actually lived before this moment of consciousness? Have you ever wondered what it is that makes us human? These are some intriguing puzzles presented in the stylish new thriller Dar. Ciry. Unfortunately they are dangled in front of the viewer like a carrot, kept just out of reach so.that you know there is an interesting concept somewhere there, but you also know you won’t get to see it. Dar,4 Cz@ has great ideas but lacks the follow-through toga anywhere with them. The story follows John Murdoch (Rufus Sewel), a man

who wakes up in a hotel room with no memories. With the help of Dr. Schreiber (Kiefer Sutherland in a Peter Lorresque mad scientist role) Murdoch uncovers a sinister plot by a group of aliens, called The Strangers, to manipulate the human population. On a purely visual levelDark C&y is well worth the price of admission. The atmosphere is dark, sinister, and crackling with mystery. The set design is reminiscent of all those great early German expressionist movies like Metropolis and Tjfe Cu&e~ of Dr. Coligari. The movie is filled with high angular buildings that cast ominous shadows over the narrow streets. The art direction is not unique but it is nice to see a science fiction movie that copies its style from something other than Blud~Rzmw. In fact much ofllar4 C2y reminds you of other movies. The Strangers, men with pale faces who wear long black coats, look a little too much like the

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Finally, after years of humiliating anal probing, Kiefer Sutherland prepares for a little alien payback. Imprint cenobites from theHe~Z&&movies. And there are many elements of film noir detective movies, such as rain filled streets and clothes and cars from the 1930s era. Dark City is one of those movies that is about cool little ideas wrapped around amazing sets. Character and, plot make an appearance but don’t really move beyond the cardboard stage. That said, there are some good performances. Richard O’Brien (Riff Raff from Rocky

P&m Show) is great as Mr, Hand, one of the more psychotic ofThe Strangers. His raspy English accented voice is perfect for this sort of role. Ir may be a cardboard role but O’Brien at least makes it that textured cardboard stuff with little designs all over it. They really should put him in more movies. Rufus Sewel does the doeeyed victjm of circumstance bit really well. He looks confused when he’s supposed to and horri-

Hoffof

file photo

fied when he’s supposed to. However, Kiefer Sutherland’s stilted speech pattern starts out kinda cool but ends up being really annoying. Despite all ies flaw&ark C@ is an incredibly likeable movie. It’s like an old crazy aunt that nobody else in the family talks to. You can see her flaws and weaknesses but that doesn’t mean you don’t have genuine affection for her and don’t love spending time listening to her crazy stori&

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Friday,

IMPRINT,

March

ARTS

13, 1998

The jazzman cometh Barry

Elmes

Quintet

by Chis Edginton Imprint staff

rice again the team of Murch & Wingelaar has put together another fine jazz production and, once again, it’s within a short drive from K-W. Last Sunday’s performance of The Barry ElmesQuintet brought to the area what few folks presently have the opportunity to see: great Canadian jazz. The Murch/Wingelaar organization presented their third in a series of jazz productions at the Cambridge Arts Theatre which was a superb venue for the genre. Elmes himself, always cordial between songs, noted the presence and sound quality ofthe music when played on its stage. Like the concerts before it, this one opened with Glenn Murch on guitar backed by his accompanying musicians. Murch scaled down Sunday’s opening performance playing with only Steve Wallace on bass, and Cathy Menard on vocal. ‘The trio melded

Barry

Elmes kicks out the jazz jams. photo

beautifully without hitting theaudience with anything that may have overshadowed the feature act. Indeed, Elmes, a regularcomponentof the Glenn Murch Quartet, was intentionally left out. The trio played only a short set of recognizables and rarities including “Old Devil Moon” and “I Wish You Love.” Elmes is an accomplished musician, having taken home sev-

by William

Hamlin

era1 prestigious awards and recognitions. Presented with Jazz Report’s “Drummer of the Year” in ‘93 and ‘94, and a Juno nomihation for “Climbing”, Elmes lived up to every expectation. The feature quintet play with a familiarity that typifies great jazz cooperation. Elmes lead his supporting cast through his own songs as well as others’. The group set the stage for the remainder of the

evening with an Elmes original “C.P. Blues.” Notably, Kevin Turcotte on the trumpet played with all of his Sudbury background behind him; the sound ranging from the stylings of Baker to a flavour all his,own. Similarly, Juno winner Mike Murley on saxophone rocked and rolled feverishly, shaking through his solos with an exciting enthusiasm. Elmes himself remained behind the spotlight only soloing once: somewhat surprising. However, moving on to “Cutey,” as inspired by Sonny Rollins, Turcotte switched to the a mute and Elmes brought his skins out from the backdrop. Particularly, Elmes switched from sticks to brushes and back again without the slightest disturbance of continuity.

Not until “Shim, Sham, Shimmy” did the incredible work of bassist Steve Wallace shine through. Up to this point, Wallace joined the others in their sequential solos, but upon “Shim..,” Wallace took the melody, playing some fantastically quick lines. Add to this the pairing of Elmes’ drums, note for note, and the outcome was exhilarating. The Elmes quintet presented its audience with nothing short of an exceptional performance. It was jazz that was progressive while at the same time it contained elements of traditional compositions. The series continues April 5 with trumpeter Kenny Wheeler at the Cambridge Arts Theatre. Call the Centre in the Square box office at 5784570 for tickets and further details.

St. Paddy’s Day zaniness by Rachel Imprint

E. Beattie staff

re you looking for something fun to do this St. A, addy’s Day? Well the Bombshelter has thcshow for you. They are presenting the entertaining and versatile band the Beirdo Brothers. This local band consists of the multitalented Sandy MacDonald who playsclassical, acoustic and electric guitars,

five-stringand tenor banjos, mandolin, ukulele, bass, drums, piano and saxophone, and Glen Soulis who plays a variety of recorders, penny whistles, flutes, saxophones, fiddles and other novelty instruments (most of which he also plays with his nose.) The Beirdo Brothers have been a staple of the K-W music scene for a long time. They perform everywhere from Children’s concerts, fairs and festivals to re-

ceptions, dances, Oktoberfest (as the Rolling Steins) to working as strollingminstrels. Their repertoir consists of folk, bluegrass, country, traditional, jazz, opera, classical and pop to name a few styles. The event promises to be entertaining, as the Beirdos have a reputation putting on performantes that are high energy, fluteup-your-nose fun. They back up their kooky sense of humour with a genuine musical talent.

R.O.O.F. rocks for kids by Rachel Imprint

E. Beattie staff

.O,O,F (Reaching Our Outdoor Friends), a ocal non-profit organ& tion street youth in the area, wi 1 be holding its second annual be iefit concert on Saturday, March 4at the Walper Pub in Kitchener. It will feature such local artists as Tatiana Bruand, Mark Weston, Lindsay Stewart, Mark Perak and r&on. All these performers are generously donating th?ir time and talent to help raise money and awareness for R.O.0.F and its services for strket kids. The Walper Pub and Sears Canada are also helping to make the event happen. R.O.0.F believes that one youth on the street is one too many. Their objectives are to ensure the health and safety of youths aged 12 and up who live on the streets. R.O.O.F. provides meals, food, clothing, hygiene products, laundry facilities, show-

ers, prescriptions, and a safe environment to those youths. They also provide services like help findingemployment, housingand schooling, addiction counselling, crisis counselling and life skills training. They also work to educate the public on street youth through forums and public speaking engagements, as well as preventative work with junior and senior high schools by stressing

Playing March-l 3-22 (ONE BLOCK SOUTH OF BRIffiEtiiT 6 Princess St. W Waterloo 885-2950

& KING)

the alternatives to street life. Not only do you get to hear great music but you could win great prizes, such as gift certificates from local restaurants, camping or sports equipment, gift baskets, and other neat stuff. Tickets cost $10, and $8 for students. Further donations to R.O.O.F. accepted. With your help we can show street kids that they are worth caring about.

*aa

and the winner 1s

ats off (make that pants off) to all the brave souls who participated in Imprint’s Ben Harper giveaway. There were quite a few more asses in the office than usual last Friday morning. Congratulations to the two winners, (I won’t name names), who recieved a pair of Ben Harper tickets and a Ben Harper discography, respectively, for their butt-baring efforts. Just another reminder that

Ben Harper is playing this Saturday, March 14 at Massey Hall in Toronto. The ticket situation is no doubt grim by now, but don’t take my word for it. Tickets may still be available through the good folks at Ticketmaster (416) 8724255. This promises to be a kickass show, so stop making excuses and get yourself a ticket already! Again, thanks all those who participated. Viva la revolution!

ENERATION ALTERNATIVE

VIDEO

: 2% MEDIAI

ARTS

IMPRINT,

Friday, March 13, 1998

The wind beneath Birdie’s wings ,

Interview with Casey Marshall -

Birdie in Encore Attractions’ ‘&Bye Bye Birdie” 4rIhatmi?zdie?&puwe

Conrad

March

13 and 14

by Mark Imprint

l3esz staff

his March 13 and 14, the Centre in the Square will be hosting Encore Attractions’ touring production of “Bye Bye Birdie.” Birdie is a musical comedy about a rock star named Conrad Birdie, who is an Elvis-like persona from the 50’s. Birdie is drafted into the army which leads to a media circus because of his departure from a small American town. I had a nice chat with Casey Marshall, who is playing Conrad in this production.

w~e~eafeyoupe~urming~g~~now? In New York City right now. Actually, we had a day off so I thought I’d come into the city and have a little fun, have a little relaxing time. Tomorrow we are in Easton, Pennsylvania. About an hour out of the city.

Oh, he’s just great, he’s really, really great. We’re on the road a lot. We pretty much do one town a day and during all these travels he kind of keeps us riveted with all these stories of being in Hollywood for ail these years. Oh, it’s just fascinating, he is just great to be around.

Oh, I love it. It’s just been a great experience. The character is a lot of fun. I can pretty much, you know, have a lot of fun with this charticter. Me’sawful Elvis-ish. And the audience enjoys that and I can have some fun with the character.

Hme you ever been to Cunuu’u befort?? No, I haven’t actually. 1’~ really excited about it. I’ve never seen Canada.

Andrew Dice Clay finds another steady job. Imprint

I’d seen the play once or twice. Of course I’d seen the movie more than a 1000 times over. And the TV movie as well, so I was pretty familiar with it.

Iknow that Tmy Dolza/rue name on tlis production. ever seen Tfoy in anything Oh sure, I’ve seen ies. ‘And pretty much

is the bti Him you befm? his movgrew up

with Troy

my mother Donahue.

talking

file

photo about

IVhfs if like wo fking - wifh him tight ?iOW?

About 10 years. Most of my acting experience is camera work. But as far as stage goes, I did a tour of Taiwan singing Broadway [showtunes]. It was called “Broadway Greats” which was earlier this year. I’ve done a lot of Rogers and 1 Hammerstein stuff, and “Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat,” doing almost exactly the same character. Yes, fhe Phn-ouh is very close io ths us I mulL You got it. But this character isa lot more fun because I’m actually through the whole show, and I get to do a lot more stuff with it.

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W&5-h pluy do you tnosf enjoy doing? Was if this one or “Josep/r “‘? Well, if it’s between those two, it’s definitely this one, I got a lot more to do in this one! I mean the pharoah only has one song and leaves. So this one is a lot more fun to do, there’s a lot more I can delve in to,. I read thf you were in “sradip Tro0pers. ” What kind of expen-em& win hf? It was a very good experience. It was the first time I got to do some camera work with special effects, and pretending that things were there that weren’t. But that was actually a lot offun to do. WI&

0th

movie

work

hzve you

done?

Mostly it has been television [Stmdip Troopers] would be the only big movie you would know about. Television stuff: I was on “The Nanny” and I spent a couple of years on “Lois and Clark: The Adventures of Superman.” 1 was the photo double for Dean Cain. And some guest shots on some other shows.

work.

4liWiaSew INFORMATION

(416)

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ARCHITECTS

To contact us in Toronto: Mary German0 - Business Manager Fax (416) 214-9686 3 Church Street Suite 202 jobs@mediaserv.com l

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I probably feel more at home on camera, but boy, it’s a lot more fun being on stage. You get that automatic response from peopIe watching you, and you know it’s just, there’s nothing like a live audienceA’s absolutely the most thrilling thing to do.

She’s new, again by Lisa Johnson Imprint staff The much-touted “best Madonna album since Like a P~QY&’ is finally here. Madonna has discovered the phenomenon of electronica and employs the knowledge of William Orbit who serves as producer onRq oflight. Ever a trend-setter, Madonna has embraced many newbies: a new musical genre, a new vocal range, a new-found spirituality, and new lyrical material. There are songs about love (both romantic and familial), but not one about sex. Surprised? Don’t be. Madonna is a human being and is allowed to grow and change like the rest of

I 4-a- ’ I I . I, song on tne L;u ana snoulcl nave been the break-out single. The danceability of this record is undeniable. “Ray of Light,” as well as re-mixes of “Frozen” and the Sanskrit “Shanti/Ashtangi” will undoubtedly score big in dance clubs. It has been said that Madonna is only successful because she is a great a businesswoman. Although her boardroom brass is indisputable, she has always maintained that her career is about the music, the art. Despite what: mass-consumption does to her music or her image, Madonna is first and foremost an artist. Wait - first a mother, then an artist.

Let’s talk water imagery. Madonna is definitely not subtle with songs like “Drowned World, ” “Swim, ” “Frozen,” and “Mer Girl”. This, coupled with the light imagery prevalent in many songs, leads to the overwhelming theme of rebirth. Since her daughter was born, anyone can see the rebirth that has taken place within Madonna - not reinvention this time. The void Lourdes has filled in Madonna’s heart is evident throughout the entire aIbum, most noticeably in “Little Scar,” an .affeccing and genuinely sweet song: “My life/ My soul/ You make my spirit whole.‘? Vocally, that range which was brought out through the vocal training she received during&it& is most evident in “Ray of Light,” and “Swim,” Madonna’s voice is stellar and the song-writing is strong. Whyrhen the need for all the technological button-pushing wizardry? The best songs on the album are those which downplay this aspect and incorporate -guitars and string arrangements. It would have been nice to see her display her talent a little more in these musical settings which do a greater service to her songs, both lyrical ty and vocally. Incidentally, the title track is by far the best

“If it ain’t broke, don’t fix it” is an old saying Shawn Ryder is quite familiar with. stupidstzrpid &~@varies little from It’s Great Wh,w, Yuzc‘re Sfcz&+t.. . . Ye&, and why shouldn’t it? After having put out an album containing three top ten singles, there’s no reason to change a thing. The dumb title of the record originated from a substitution made by Kermit when he was asked to change the line “Talking Bullshit, Bullshit, Bullshit” from “Reverend Black Grape” for a television program; Kermit sang “TalkingStupid,Scupid, Stupid.” Ryder, not willing to spend thought on a title, took it as the

heading of their second album. Stupid Stupid Stupid has independent merits however. Black Grape puts out tunes driven by mood rather than technicality. The songs rarely take intricate twists and turns but rather drive along with a familiar pace throughout. Heavy bass influence mixed with rap interludes and near spoken word lectures by Ryder is the hallmark of the Black Grape sound. Ryder’s lyrics and songwriting are often tongue and

lorn, contemplative, vulnerable, whimsical, and clad in a flowing dress. It is not far-fetched co imagine a number of singles hitting the mainstream with this album. Bif is quickly joining the ranks of well-respected, ground-breaking artists. Nocfem& artists or Cmadian artists, either. Just artists. I SZ$CUJ is a strong sophomore effort which exhibits the sheer musicianship of the singer. Naked or not, Bif rocks!

by Graham Imprint

by Lisa Johnson Imprint staff

by Chris Edgintdn Imprint staff

us.

cheek with the first track, “Get Higher,” containing Ronald and Nancy Reagan impersonators notingthat, despite their best efforts, there are reports of marijuana shortages. This is followed by the news that both are hooked on heroin. This sense of sarcasm and the frank disregard for saving face pushes through to the album’s finish; it’s clear the boys are just out to have a good time. If you liked the first one, it’s a fairly good bet that you’ll like this one. Black Grape continue to write consistent and fun party music with little change from 1995.

It’s rhe second release from the tattooed, lip-ringed rocker (third if you count last year’s spoken word album). Bif is back with a few changes. First, she is no longer naked. The last name is conspicuously missing from this album. She says she was getting

sick of people focusing on “Naked” rather than the music. Secondly, unlike her self-titled debut which runs the gamut from pop to rap to metal to beautiful ballads without missing a beat, this album is choc-full of radiofriendly, pop-rock anthems. The first single “Spaceman,” is cufrently enjoying extensive play on MuchMusic, Catchy hooks one cannot help but succumb to infiltrate this album. Bifhas never shied away from writingprovocative, up-front, and emotional songs; her debur. featured “Tell On You (A.K.A. Letter to My Rapist).” In the same vein, this album delivers “Chotee,” a song %nencing an abortion Bif had when she was young and naive. The material is gut-wrenching, yet the musical background is infinitely up-beat. Is she trying to send a message with this contradiction, or is she just trying to take some weight off the material? The third surprise is the revamped image. The photographs on the new album’s liner notes are stunning, showing a Bif that we haven’t yet seen: sexy, for-

Now break out the passport, because disc one is somewhere you’ve yet to be with Goldie. A solid dose of patience is required to listen to”Mother”, as it tops out at just over an hour in length (and yes, that actually is a 30-piece string section). When the beats fmally arrivearound the 20 minute mark, you remember who you’re

Dunn St&

A little word association for you all: Goldie. The first thing to your mind should be Metalheadz, quickly followed by names like Photek, Alex Reese and Source Direct. If you got that, then look out, ‘causeSatt/mxretum will be a little familiar wrapped up in a whole lot of foreign. The familiar: Beats, “Temper Temper” (with Noel Gallagher on the fuzziest guitar going) opens up disc two with five minutes ofanger. Goldie then changes gears into “Digital” with KRSl laying out, in detail, exactly why Goldie is all that. We get a trip to the R&B side with “Believe” and some jazzy beats and Diane Charlemange on vocals for “Crystal Clear.”

listening to, with a vengance. This is not a jungle record. This is not Hip Hop, not R&B, not drum and bass. This is just Goldie. “Mother” is introspective, often painfully so for the listener, reminiscient of reading poetry you wrote when you were 16. However, “Trust”, with David Bowie crooning softly to what sounds like aSpaceTime Contiuum loop, transcends the awkwardness and becomes pure beauty. Alas, the proof that this is “it”, the kick-ass follow-up to Timeless, never quite shows up. Though SuM7zxretzrrx suffers from artistic bloat, it offers a glimpse of where jungle can and should go.

Doors Open 8 9:00 pm + Photo ID Required +

Dress Code in Effect

POSTCARDS

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Before you go to the Bomber on St. Paddyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Day, fillout a post card for peace in Northern Ireland, it is only 50 cents!!

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FESTIVAL!!

Come celebrate your culture The FEDS are having a Multicultural Festival in the SLC this Thursday, March 19 It is free so come and experience world at WATERLOO

This will takeplace on Wednesday March 18 in front of FED Copy Plus - startsat 10 am

FEDS AWIARENESSVVEEK!! b Service Day March 17,1&2 SLC Learn about services, buy baked goods, get free stuff .. for more info call Heather Calder VPSI, Ext. 6331

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Applications for the following schoiarships are being accepted during the Winter term. Refer to Section 4 of the Undergraduate Calendar for further criteria. Application forms are available in the Student Awards Office, 2nd floor, Needles iiall. Ail Faculties: Undergraduate Bursary Program -the Student Awards Office administers a large number of undergraduate bursaries and awards based on financial need and possibly on other factors such as marks, extracurricular activities, etc. Deadline: students may apply during the term until the first day of exams. Doreen B&bin Award - available to third year Regular or 38 Co-op female students in an Honours program in which women are currently under represented. Deadline: April 30, 1998. Leeds-Waterloo Student Exchange Program Award - students to contact John Medley, Mechanical Engineering. Faculty of Applied Health Sciences: Michael Geiiner Memorial Scholarship - available to all 3rd year Regular Health Studies and Kinesiology. Deadline: Mar. 31,1998. Robert Haworth Scholarship - compbtion of 3rd year in an honours program in resource management related

go to R.O.O.F.

ChristianPmenzano, NewPrez, KurtSchreiter UPInternal, VariousotherFEDS andyourSociety Presidents!

Pick up your copy on tiesday! It is available all day for a donation to ROOF .

MULTICULTURAL

FEDS

to Park Planning and Management, Recreation, Natural Heritage or Outdoor Recreation. Deadline: Mav 28. 1998. Faculty of Arts: Robin K. BanksIPacioii Award D available to 1B Accountancy Studies based on marks and extracurricular involvement. Deadline: Mar. 31, 1998. UW-Manuiife Community & World Service Award - available to students who have completed a work-term in the service of others, locally, nationally or abroad who received little or no remuneration. Interested students should contact Arts Special Program, HH. Faculty of Engineering: Andersen Consulting Scholarship available to 3B. Deadline: Mar. 31,1998. Canadian Posture and Saating Centre Scholarship - available to all. Deadline: Oct.15, 1998. Keith Carr Memoriai Award - available to 3NB or 4A Chemical. Deadline: June 30,1998. Consulting Engineersof Ontario Schoiarship - available to all 3B. Deadline: Mar. 31,1998. John Deere Limited Scholarshipavailable to all 36 Mechanical with an interest in manufacturing and/or product design. Deadline: Mar. 31, 1998.

Randy Duxbury Memorial Award available to all 36 Chemical. Deadline: Mar. 31,1998. S.C. Johnson & Son Ltd. Environmental Scholarship mavailable to 3rd year Environmental (Chemical). Deadline: May 28, 1998. Ontario Hydro Engineering Awards - available to 1B Chemical, Electrical, Environmental or Mechanical. Eligible candidates will be women, aboriginal (native) Canadians, persons with disabilities or visible minorities. Deadline: Juty 31, ,I 998. Marcel Pequegnat Scholarship available to 38 Civil - Water Resource Management students. Deadline: May 28,1998. Jack Wiseman Award - available to 3B Civil. Deadli$e: Oct. 31, 1998. Faculty of Environmental Studies: Robert Haworth Schoiarship-completion of 3rd in an honours program in resource management related to Park Planning and Management, Ret-

Canada $26.49

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$52.23

Eiectrohome 75 Anniversary SchoF arship - available to 38 Computer Science. Deadline: Mar. 31, 1998. Friar Luca Pacioii Award - available to 18 Accountancy Studies based on marks and extracurriiular involvement. Deadline: Mar. 31, 1998. K.C. Lee Computer Science Scholarship - available to 2nd year Regular Computer Science. Deadline: Oct. 31, 1998. Faculty of Science: Dow Canada Scholarship - available to 3A Chemistry. Deadline: June 15, 1998. S.C. Johnson & Son Ltd. Environmental Scholarship - available to 3rd year Chemistry. Deadline: May 28,1998. Marcel Pequegnat Scholarship -available to 38 Earth Science/Water Resource Management. Deadline: May28,

-reation, Natural Heritage or Outdoor

Recreation. Deadline: May 28, 1998. Marcel Pequegnat Scholarship available to 3rdyear Environment and Resource Studies, Planning, Water Resoutve Management. Deadline: May 28,1998. Faculty of Mathematics: Anderson Consulting Award -available to 3B Math. Deadline: Mar. 31, 1998.

Engineering and Society Humanitarian Award - open to undergraduate Engineering students who publish articles in The Iron Warrior. Assigned topic. One award per term, beginning Winter 1998. For details contact the Centre for So& ety, Technology and Values (x621 5, email: cstv@engmail.uwaterioo.ca) orthe editor of The Iron Warrior (x2693; email: iwarrior 6 engmail.uwaterloo.ca)

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Sept ‘98 - 8 bedroom house- 2 kitchens, 2 livingrooms, 3 bathrooms, laundry, parking, 25 minute walk. Devitt Street, Waterloo. $300. each, utilities included. 574-4728. Rooms for rent rn a 3-bedroom house. Very close to universities, gas heating, basic amentities. $325-$400/month/ room. Call 725-5348. tiept. ‘98 - l-4 bedrwmand I-5 bedroom house, 2 baths, laundry, parking, 20 minute walk. Cedarbrae Avenue and Brookhaven Crescent. 574-4728. h Phillip street townhouses - really clo!e - Summer sublets available: Paul 886-5865 ; Scott 885-0008 ; Nitan 7251025 ; Paul 888-0079 ; Laura 746-6629 ; Daniela 725-3704 ; Laurena 746-7694 ; Mike 746-9674 ; Gina 885-5524 ; Catherine 884-3491 and Charles 7465761. Residence Accommodatron: Hesurrection College is accepting applications for residence for the upcoming Fall and Winter terms. Single rooms for undergraduates (second year and above), graduates, and doctoral students are available. If you are looking for a small, quiet residence with a warm, homelike atmosphere, give Patti a call at 885-4950. E-mail: ptusch@ionline.net.

Weekend Counsellors & Relief Staff to work in homes for individuals with developmental challenges. Experience, minimum 8-month commitment. Paid positions. Send resume to Don Mader, KW Habilitation Services, 108 Sydney Street, S., Kitchener. Ontario, N% 3v2. International languages! Earn $1 ,OOO-$5,0001month part time working from home. No experience necessaw. Full training. Call Mr. Thomoson (418) 631-3581.BYOB (Be your own boss). Retail booths Main Street Grand &nd on Lake Huron. Sell your product to Young Tourists. Get your MBA (Mega beach attitude). From $995. for the summer. __._. _.___ Call 51 Q-473-4084. Summer Business opportunityEnterprising Distributers wanted. Market fun Canadian products - outdoor events - be your own boss - enjoy profits. Information (403) 867-2094.

University Whitewater Rafting Weekend June 12-14, $150. all inclusive. Live band, fun times, prizes, giveaways! Bring the gang! WildernessTours l-800-267-91 66. Time constraints writer’s block? Can’t find the words or the right research materials you need? We can help! Write: Custom Essay Service, 4 Collier St., Suite 201, Toronto, Ontario, M4W lL7. Call (416) 960-0240. Computer Lease Program - P200 MMX, 32 MB RAM, 2.1 GB HDD, 56 Kbps Modem, 16X CD-ROM, 14” monitor. $0 Down! Only $13.75/week!! FREE DELIVERY. Call I-800-267-9466. Tweed Music: Piano lessons with Sam Wiersma MA BEd ARCCO. Reasonable rates. Students of all ages welcome. Central Waterloo location. Mention this ad for a discount of 15% from initial lesson package. 741-9163. Cube and Cargo vans available for people moving to Western Canada. These are rental vehicles going one way only. Also cars available to other destinations. Call 1-800-668-l 879 or (416) 222-4700.

LSAT-MCAT-GMAT-GRE Prep Spring/ Summer classes are forming now. Courses range from 20 to 80 hours and start at $195. Subscribe to our FREE Law School Bound email newsletter at learn @ prep.com. Richardson - Since 1979 -www.prep.com or l-800-41 O-prep. I ravel - teach tngllsh: b day/40 hour June 24-28. TESOL teacher certification (or by correspondence). 1,000’s of jobs available NOW. FREE information package, toll free l-888-270-2941.

MONDAYS English Language Lab - is held from 2:30 to 3:20 in Modern Languages 113 from Sept. to June. The class has an emphasis on pronunciation and listening exercises. Students, faculty, staff and spouses are welcome to attend. For more info contact the International Student Office, ext. 2814. Outers Club Meetings - Environmental Studies 1, room 221 at 6:30 p.m. Discuss and plan outdoor adventures. Get help with organizing and equipment (rentals available). Day trips happening every weekend. Check us out! TUESDAYS TOEFL Preparation Course - the test

Looking for custom clothes for your Rezfloor,club,faculty?Tearawaypants $29.95, Hospital pants $15.95. Call tollfree l-888-400-5455 and ask for Buddy. Ladies! Fastball teams or players wanted for KW Ladies Fastball League. Season runs from May-end of Auaust. Call Cindy at 742-9801. e Sports Nutrition - get energized at Sports Medicine World. Now in stock: Creatine, Vanadyl, H.M.B., Glutamine, Whey Protein, Diet Products, Protein/ Energy Bars and much more! Reputable brand names including: E.A.S., Interactive, Ultimate Nutrition, Designer Protein, and Twin Lab. Extremely competitive pricing: 4209. Creatine $49. ; IOOOg. $97. Sports Medicine World, 247 King Street, N., at University Ave. (beside Gus Maue Sports)

Wordprocessing, editing, proofing. Professional, fast service at student rates. Near university. Pickup available. Call 884-6183.

of English as a foreign language course begins Jan. 20 and ends Mar. 25. Classes are held every Tuesday and Thursday from 2-4:30 p.m. The IO week course is desi ned to prepare people writing the TO 2 FL exam. Register at the lntarnational Student Ofice, NH2080 or call ext. 2814 for more details. Dart League at Grad House. Beginners come at 6 p.m., Intermediate 7:30 p.m., Advanced 9 p.m. Darts available with I.D. Instructions and rules provided. Sign up at the bar. THURSDAYS The Infinite Circle will be holding discussion groups in ML 104, 7:30 - 9:30 p.m. on “alternative spirituality”.

Guided self-change of alcohol use: for individuals who may have concerns about the amount they are drinkin and want tocut down. Call Counselling 8 ewices, ext. 2655 to find out more. Scholarship funds are available throu h the Multiple Sclerosis Association o3 America’s PROJECT: Learn MS ‘98 Essay Competition. June 5, 1998 is deadline. To obtain re &ration form and info call 1-800-LEA w N MS. Renison College is now accepting residence applications from undergraduate students for both the winter and spring terms in 1998. For further info contact the Residence Office, Renison College at 884-4404, ext. 611 The region’s waste reduction office asks all residents to keep Blue Box and cart recycling safe. Keep snow and ice cleared from around your recycling container. Ensure that your recycling container is visible and placed at the end of yor driveway for easy access by the recycling drivers. Snowy weather has arrived! Please help the City of Waterloo keep the sidewalks clear of snow for seniors, wheelchairs, disabled and all persons in general. Please shovel and keep cars off streets so snowplows can do their job. The IODE Gladys Raiter Bursary for Graduate Study IS offered for one year of post-graduate study to residents of the Municipality of Waterloo or students studying at the University of Waterloo or Wilfrid Laurier University. Approximate value $3,500. Application deadline April 15, 1998. For info telephone 905-5229537Ifax 905-522-3637 or contact the Graduate Offices at the above Universi-Catharines Collegiate Inst. and Voc. School is celebrating their 75th Anniversary on May 15 to 17. All students and staff members who attended since 1923 are invited to come home and celebrate. For info call (905) 687-7261 or website at www.niagara.com/collegiate, or mail address is 34 Catherine Street, St. Catharines, Ontario, l2R 5E7. Waterloo-Germany Exchange - open to all students. Receive UW Credits language fluency - International experience - Intercultural skills! Deadline is March 15, 1998. For more info contact secretary in Modern Languages, room 313 or the Director at 885-1211, ext. 2260, http:// watarts.uwaterlo~.~al-mboehrin/Exchange/mannheim.htm. Employment Strategies Works hop looking for a JOB? Not sure where to start? Disability Services and Counselling Services are offering a six-session workshop on Employment Strategies. The workshop isgeared tostudents with disabilities and will address the following: self-assessment ; disclosure & job accommodations ; career resourcecen-

If you are interested in any of the following volunteer opportunities, please contact Sue Coulter at the Volunteer Action Centre at 742-8610. Quote the position number at the end of the description when you call. Pleasevisit the Volunteer Action Centre’s website at: http:// www.wchat.on.ca/public/kitchener/ vacfileshrac.htm ..n Young Parent Support Worker: #0631981. At Saint Monica House, your childcare experience or ability to work with young parents is urgently needed. Seeking Surfers: #67-1731. If you know how to cruise the web and would like to show others how it’s done, then get clicking at the Kitchener public Library. Walk & Roll For Mental Health: #Ol l2232. Join an enthusiastic group of volunteers who are organizing a walk and rollerblading fundraising event for the Canadian Mental Health Assoc. The Art of Fundraising: #070-2231. An art collection of unframed prints has been allocated to a local organization. They are in need of a volunteer to coordinate a fundraising effort in the community with the prints. Reception With A Difference: #0702230. An interesting agency that does research and education related to social justice issues is looking for you for one or two afternoons a week. Number Navigator Needed: #0502224. Join a well known local volunteer Board of Directors and help them by maintaining trleir books. Volunteers with car and time during day are needed to drive elderly clients to medical and other appointments. Flexible position. Mileage reimbursement y6a$ble. RAISE Home Support, 744” .

tre services ; finding employers & job search strategies ; technology that works finding jobs-on the internet and using the UW Accessibility Centre ; panel of prospective employers ; presentation by successful graduates. The sessions will run every Tuesday afternoon, from 2-4 D.m. starting February 24 to March 31, i 998. Inter&ted studknts can sign up in Needles Hall, room 2051. For more info contact Rose Padacz, ext. 5231. Arts Spring Formal- Friday, March 20, 1998 at the Transylvania Club. Tickets available now in the Arts Student Union Off ice, AL1 20. St. Paul’s College, UW, announces the position of Senior Don (Male). Deadline for submission of application is March 25, 1998. Questions and application should be directed to Fred Frick, Dean of Residence, 885-l 460. Transltions ‘98 - Job Search Strateies Conference for Arts Alumni and 8 raduating Students - will takes place on March 7 from 8:30 a.m. to 3:30 p.m. To re ister and info contact Christine Woo 3 s at ext. 2119 or email: cwoodsQwatarts. Preparing for and writing exams-these 1 session workshops will aid students in preparing for and writing exams: Tues., March 17 from 6-8 p.m. and Thurs., March 19 from 9:30-l 1:30 a.m. Materials fee $1 .OO. Register at Counselling Services, NH2080 or call ext. 2655. Residence accommodation - Resurrection College is accepting applicationsfor residence for the upcoming Fall &Winter terms. Single rooms for undergraduates (2nd year and above}, graduates and doctoral students are available. If you are looking for a small, quiet residence with a warm, homelike atmosohere, give Patti a call at 885-4950. Em&l: ptu&Eh 8 ionline.net HopeSpring, the support centre for people living with cancer, is pleased to announce their move to 43 Allen Street, West. The move is scheduled for March 23 which will allow for expanded setvices and offer a larger hand in a time of personal crisis. Table Tennis Championship, Concordia Club, is hosting its first annual table tennischampionshipon March 21. Cash prizes for lst, 2nd and 3rd olace finishes. For more info call Hans ‘Malthaner at 747-2902. Travel and study program - Jewish History and Culture in Central Europe August 16 to September 2, 1998. For details call 888-4002 or email at conted 8 corrl .uwaterloo.ca Cambridge Self-Help Food Bank is pleased to be holding a one-day program for all parents/expectant parents on Tuesday, March 24 to learn how to make baby food. It will begin at 9 a.m. til 3 p.m., 56 Dickson Street (Old Fire Hall1 ”

Volunteer tutors are needed to tutor students on a one-to-one basis in written and oral English. Tutors meet students on campus, usually once a week for l-2 hours for 1 term. If you have a good working knowledge of English, are patient, friendly, dependable, and would like to volunteer, register at the lntemational Student Off ice, NH 2080. For more info call ext. 2814. The Waterloo Community Arts Centre requires a Centre Attendant for Tuesday afternoons l-2 hours per week. Call 8864577 or drop by 25 Regina Street, S., Waterloo. Learn about a diff erent culture while you show a new immigrant how to be a part of your community. For more information, call K-W Y.M.C.A. Host Perogram at 579-9622. VOLUNTEER AT IMPRINT - NO EXPERIENCENECESSARY.COMETOTHE STUDENT LIFE CENTRE, ROOM 1116 TO DISCOVER YOUR NEWSPAPER! Waterloo Minor Soccer require house league coaches for 1998. The season runs May to July or August. Training provided. Come share your time and - ialents! Call 578-9680. You too can be a Big Sister volunteer. Ask about our Short-Term Match program created for university students. Call 743-5206 and ask about our 1 day training session. SMOKERS NEEDED - a smoking cessation study is being carried out on campus. If you smoke, please consider volunteering to fill out a short questionnaire. You could win a movie ticket for two. Questionnaires will be available at the porter and Davis Libraries, Student Life Centre, The Bomber, Grad House, and main entrance of most UW campus buildings.To return your questionnaires, send

Saturday, March 14,1998 Seminar: The alternative spirituality club the Infinite Circle will be holding an esoteric tools seminar in ML 104 discussing Palmistry, Tarot, and Runes. No chirge. Noon till 5 p.m. Sunday,March l&l998 KW Chamber Music - presents “The Trillium” Brass Quintet at 8 p.m. at the KVVCMS Music Room, 57YoungStreet, W., Waterloo. Reservations 886-l 673. Monday, March t6,1998 Study Skills Program is offring 1 session workshops on Preparing for&Writing Exams. Register at Counselling Services, NH, room 2080. Wednesday, March 18,1998 Student Career Assistants needed for 1998-99. Gain valuable job search and career-related skills by helping other students in their career planning and job search. This is a volunteer position requiring a 3 hour commitment per week. Open to regular and co-op students with strong interpersonal, oral and written communication skills. Applications available in the Career Resource Centre, NH 1115, or from our web page: www.adm.uwaterloo.ca/infocecs/CRC/ Student-Career-Advisor98.html. Deadline is March 18. 1998. Back by popular demand, folk artist Cate Friesen will perform with composer Carol Ann Weaver at 12:30 p.m. in the Chapel at Conrad Grebel College. FREE! Gay and Lesbian Liberation of Waterloo Coming Out Discussion Group. Topic: “Media Images and Role Models’ 7:30 p.m. Social follows at 9 p.m., HH 378. Meet old friends and make new ones. All welcome. Details: 884-4569. Friday, March 20, 1998 Arts S ring Formal at the Transylvania Club. P ickets available now in the Arts Student Union Office, AL 120. CCF presents “Just One Way” with guest speaker Randall Mah. 7 p.m. at MC 2065. Music, drama, snacks. Saturday, March 21,1996 Table Tennis Championship, Concordia Club is hosting first annual table tennis championship. Cash prizes for lst, 2nd and 3rd place finishes. For more info call Hans Malthaner at 747Tuesday, March 24,1998 The Faculty of Science presents: “Debate: Be It Resolved That Science is Gender Biased” 91271 from 4 to 5 p.m, For info&l Helena, ext. 2101 or Monica at ext. 2536.

~~~@ nB n BBBBBBBBB BBBBBBBBUB clclclcluuclnclu

them through Internal mail to: The Smoking Study, Health Studies, BMH or drop them off in the provided boxes at the Davis and Porter Libraries. This study has been reviewed and received ethics approval by the Office of Human Research and Animal Care at the University of Waterloo. If you would like additional information contact Janneth Pazmino-Canizares at Health Studies, BMH. E-mail japazmin@ healthy.uwaterloo.caor Karin Neumann at kneumann @ahsmail. uwaterloo.ca. Seeking motivated organized student to start and manage new BEST BUDDIES chapter at UW. Recruit and monitor volunteers. Training provided. lnterested students call Kim at l-888-7790061 or best.buddies @ sympatico.ca Student Career Assistants needed for 1998-99. Gain valuable job search and career-related skills by helping other students in their career planning and job search. This is a volunteer position requiring a 3 hour commitment per week. Open to regular and co-op students with strong interpersonal, oral and written communication skills. Applications available in the Career Resource Centre, NH 1115, or from our web 1Ial www.adm.uwaterloo.ca/infocecsl ‘Cf Student-Career-Advisor98. html. De I #adline is March 18, 1998.

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