1999-00_v22,n30_Imprint by Editor Imprint

S-ring Atx!:xting i-

Co-ed naked drama

Bitchin' 'bout tuition: plus ga change . . .

ters. She feels the'play has both 'naturalistic and realist components." "The concepts will be very familiar to arlene Spenceradmitsthat the latest people. They will have felt similar pressures," UW Dram department's produc- says Spencer. "There's somethiig about this don, Spring Awakening, "may be p u p o f youngguys.Theycertainlyare l4,but they also have spent time cngaeingintellem-a krordiqtothc&rele?se, the ally and trying to figure out stuff that is probwdtam bstwaen 1890 and 1891 by Frank ablymore appropriatein our world now." The Wadeldnd "& the suicide of a pupil who~to~withthcaacringlCILdCmic smndPrdsofhisschooland thedeath of an inooceatschoolgirl at the bands of a backsawtPborri~thcviclimofha~~~lignoraqcsaadik ~ ~ p n r d c r gFor . * Spenctr,tbeploy~%ehulpquesti~.whyarc we M e ? Wbat'~it all about?" w e v j d i t i n e artist to the Drama is h longtime direc#,~ of the F+ WaketapleSit+andSaXy (auditions around,feelingguiltyaboutmastllfbQtingand for**CcomingupinAptil). feeling e k d about their sexual appeSpmarch~drirpbybecr~thmarctites and desires." The conversations centre maoy issuesand themeethat arc importantto 'constantly around instinct animal inthe story: the pressures of young people, the stincts like sex and their bodie." concept of the ipdividual versus the instituThe play 'tends to make public private tion, and themany secrets held by the charat moments," and Spencer admits, "there's nu-

...

. dity in our production," and that it may make the audience a little uncomfortable. "Audiencestoday are stilla littlebit shockedby it. I'm not sure what that's about, but just the fact that they have the option of lookingwheteverthey want toon these people's bodies. It mightmake them a littleuncomfortable. It's not something you're used to seeing." Another thing people may not be uscd to

make sure the actors were not just demon saatingthe feclingsof thecharactus.Drama students Marc Andre W o u and Andy Trithardt are in the upcoming productio~ and both feelthe work isrelevant to students 'It isrelevant, it ishere and now," daim first-yearstudentBarsalm.Secondyearstu dent Trithardt admits, "I haven't beel shocked by it, i+ very fiuniliar," and hc agreeddlatthep~i5vaydevvlt.TrithPrd alsoaddedthat thepetfor the play shouldbc visually appclling; Spencer praised Robu Patersonforwhat sheconsidetskwonder fulwork. Although&littledark at times,Spence Ms confident students will not be over whelmed by the play. "It's pmty dark, but don't know that the darkness doesn't have seeing is an on-stagecirde jerk. ' m e cbarac- humour." ters] are all standing around nmmhbg toS~AwaRcningbegineMarch15 am gether in thisreformatory place." To prepare runs until M a d 18 in the Theatre of du for scenes like this,the cast spent the firsttwo Arts in the Modern LPnguPecs Building weeks together discussingpuberty. 'It's amaz- Show time is at 8 p.m. Tickets arc $8 for ing how affectcdpeoplearc today bystuff they studendseniors and $10 for the general experienced in puberty." publicandarcavailableatthcTheatre~en Sperrccr worked closely with the cast to tre Box Office in Hagey Hall.

I I I I I

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ederal Finance Minister Paul Martin arrived in Waterloo last week, hot on the heels of the buzz created by Budget 2000, Canada’s finance plan, unveiled late last month, that favours tax relief over social spending. Martin, who frequently moved out from behind the podium as he conversed with his audience, took part in a brief and casually structured question and answer session on Friday afternoon. The event was held at Wilfrid Laurier University and jointly hosted by Shawn Saldanha and Joe Horneck, respective presidents of the Young Liberals of the University of Waterloo and Wilfrid Laurier University. Martin was eager to hear opinions about the strengths and weaknesses of the budget and further encouraged discussion by posing questions to the audience. “What kind of country do you want to build?” he asked repeatedly, sipping periodically from his Roll up the Rimcup of Tim Horton’s coffee, a nationalist symbol if ever there was one. When asked why debt reduction and tax cuts were not made even more of a priority in this year’s budget, Martin pointed out that this is “the largest tax-cutting budget” in 20 years. While he admitted that the govern-

ment, but that he prefers cooperament did havt : an unexpected surment from guaranteeing how money allotted for post-secondary education to coercion and is optimistic that plus of funds a.t the end of last year, the two parties will be able to come to Martin went aIn to assert that these tion is actually used once passed on to the provinces. mutually satisfying agreements about momes were put into education, Mark Schaan, newly elected UW fund allocation. health care an d basic research and Federation of Students’ Vice-PresiRegarding the value of a liberal development. “And I arts education, will tell you however, something,” Martin is the Finance clearly at odds Minister said with the Harris government. emphatically, asmany The Ontario Progressive audience members beConservative gan to show party favours their support funding postthrough apsecondary plause, “I programs that would do it focus on pracagain and I tical skills do not apolorather than libgize for it.” eral study. Not surMartin, on the prisingly, the other hand, asfuture of serted that all post-secondforms of higher ary educaeducation are . a_ tlon was a essential in orPaul Martin: winnerofWilfrid Laurier’sfohn McCain look-alikecontest. popular topic der to mainof debate. tain and revise Many Young Liberals, who are student of Education, asked if Martin models of economic sustainability. dents in a Tory governed Ontario, was committed to “continuing to put “In the modern economy,” he voiced concern about Canadian pressure on the provinces to make pointed out, “the ability to think, to health care and the Social Transfer that money work for post-secondary articulate, to develop concepts, all of structure. education.” those things which come out of the The current structure of the The Minister admitted that his arts and out of the humanities, are Canadian Health and Social Transparty is “somewhat hamstrung” by going to be every bit as much in fer prevents the Federal GovernOntario’s current provincial governdemand” as the skills imparted by the

study of physical sciences. Martin, who has a Bachklors in Philosophy, went on to say, “We are not simply economic animals. We are much deeper.” Canadians need to think collectively and synthetically, he suggested, in order to ensure our success as a nation. Budget 2000, said Martin, which strives to balance social spending wi t h tax cuts, is an attempt to offer Canadians “the tools to succeed in the modern world.” Education, however, is only a valuable tool if it is accessible. More pertinent to students than tax relief perhaps, is the issue of tuition relief. Federation of Students President elect, Chris Farley, asked Martin what had resulted from proposals made by banksto work with government in renegotiating student-loan payment plans. “Those negotiations are stiI1 ongoing,” said Martin, who was quick to point out that, in the meantime, the Liberal Government has offered a taxcredit to help students pay back loans, instituted the Millennium Scholarship fund and made grants of $3,000 a year available to single parents returning to school. Martinwasonlycaughtoffguard once during the event, when asked if he would consider running for Prime Minister. “I’d rather be here,” said the seasoned politician, “trying to figure out how not to answer that question.”

UW receives monev from embattled HRDC ROEIN

STEWART imprint staff

ast summer, UW Math student Paul Royston had an on-campus summer job. Working for the Waterloo Public Interest Research Group (WPIRG), Paul was invalved in the Recycled Cycles program, which aims to make reconditioned bicycles available spotty for low-income families. Unwittingly, he also became connected to one of the hottest scandals in politics Canada has seen in years. Federal Minister of Human Resources Jane Stewart has found her-

self on the hot seat lately, trying to answer for the spotty distribution of over $1 billion in Federal grants through Human Resources and De-

tives. The federal government has been accused of using the HRDC grants to further their political agenda, while sacrificing the job creation that the grants were intended for. In a statement released on February 21, Minister Stewart made publicallof thegrantsallocated under the controversial program. “Canadians

closely, contained payments to three University of Waterloo groups. The University itself received $29,8 14 under the heading of youth

Jane Stewart has found Universities herself in the hot seat, received some trying to answer for the attention from distribution of 8 1 B. ZYCyynYZZF~Z>~Z~JZ the scandal. “that money was invested velopment Canada (HRDC). The $1 billion was used to contribute to a variety of programs ineluding learning, literacy, social development and job creation initia-

in all communities across the country, regardless of political stripe.” . The release encompassed more than 10,000 pages of financial transactions, which, when examined

programs and $3,017 for training programs. The Federation of Students received $2,638 forYouth Programs and WPIRG received$26,75 8. All of WPIRG’s grant money

went “directly into the pockets of students,” according to WPIRGCoordinator Linda Vieregge. Over the last three years, WPIRG has hired seven summer students through the Student Career Placement (SCP) program. Royston was one of two students working for WPIRG last summer. “These SCP programs are wonderful, because they allow students to get hands-on work experience and allow us to do things we otherwise wouldn’t be able to do,n noted Vieregge. UW’s top finance man Dennis Huber was less able to say exactly where the money directed to the University of Waterloo ended up. “It would take significant effort continued

to page 5

NEWS

Fighting sweatshops

Campus Roundup AMY

POTVIN

munituringthe

spscial to Jmptint

problem,

ing to Jay Black, Associate

Provost.

The Bomber is pleased10 uuxu~~c a new addition

that there are many unclaimed Qntario Studenti\ssistan~Prqramfoand~merits that should be picked up at axe reminded

The Bun&r Del; openedlast week to the delight of Student Life Centre patrons, The deli features sandwithes at ac~st of just $2.95, and

the Student Awards Qffice in Needks Hall in the next three weeks, or they wili become stale-dated and non-negotiable. To complete payment of your fee% you must pick up your QSAP hxn document and take it to your bank.

apparently they’re pretty good tov.

Co-op employment rate high

Physics professcw

Despite the addition of 350 co-up students, the rate of co+~p employment has remained steady at 9t3 per cent, Xn total, 4,251 stu-

retires March$ marked the retirement of Reginald Moore. After a career of 33 and a haif years, Maaxe

dents are currently working in coop placements this term, while 8 8 remain unemployed.

said he

will not give up the lifevfaphysicist simply because of his retirement, and intends to “&an up” some of his previousprojects, Moore also hopes to crezttx same problem examples to be printed off for future students, something desired by students for

Online applications now possible ln 1999, applicants from around were able to apply for undergraduate admission online Icliathe Ontario Universities’ Application Centre Web site, the world

quite Some time.

Be prepared

The site has attracwd

Next Tuesday is Campus Day, so be prepared fvr droves of high srhovl students and their families. Last year’s Campus Day saw in excessof 5,000 visitors, but with the availability of Saturday fall tours, numbers this yqar may tx dum*

lmprin t staff

potential

waiting

for pick up

Students

HEATHER MACDOUGALL

Blacked Napster accesswould not be considered censorship accord-

99/00 OSAP laan doaments

‘:

me1

1,000 applicants3 both domestic and international. The site enables potential students tv pay the application fe online, and transferdocumcnts among Ontario universities elcxtronicaily , In the future, the Ontario Uni,’

versities’

Application

Imprint, Friday, March IO. 2000

Ccntre

in-

cc1. To promote the anti-sweatshop campaign among schools who have not yet taken up the cause. “2. To share campaign experiences, ideas about innovative actions and information about developing an effective code of conduct for our schools. “3. To work together with schools who have made progress in their code of conduct initiatives to develop a strategy for a provincial and/or national monitoring system.”

wear them every day, but do you ever stop to wonder A where your clothes come from? Yes, they come from the Gap or Northern Reflections or wherever, but do you know where they were actually made? Many people are unaware of the terrible conditions in the sweatshops where our fashionable clothes are manufactured, and WPIRG has taken it into their hands to educate the public. Sweatshop workers in Central and South America face forced overtime, unhealthy and unsafe working conditions, wages that don’t even cover food and rent, forced pregnancy tests and other atrociMembers of the WPIRG conference have a serious pow-wow. ties. “The theme of the [apparel] industry seems to be The delegates worked towards erecting barriers so people can’t see,” accomplishing these goals through explains Cori Zagerell, one of the discussion groups and workshops on keynote speakers at last weekend’s such topics as innovative actions, Students Against Sweatshops Nanegotiation with the administration, tional Networking Conference, and corporate campaigns. The conwhich was held here at the University ference also managed to attract keyof Waterloo. note speakers from around the The goals of this conference, world, including representatives which attracted delegates from as far from Grinell College, GMIES {an away as the University of Regina, the independent monitoring group), and University of Alberta and Memorial the Maquila Solidarity Network. University in Newfoundland, were One of the speakers, Carolina threefold, according to the conferQuinteros, commented on the enence brochure: erg-y and enthusiasm of young Cana-

dian activists, and praised their innovative strategies. She explained that the skits and corporate campaigns practiced here are very different from the moreviolent protests in her native El Salvador, where social activists are often forced to leave the country. Quinteros also cautioned, however, that “sometimes we fight because of our egos, or we get into discussions that don’t result in anything positive . + . it’s important not to lose sight of the horizon, and our horizon is the improvemcnt of the standard of life of the (sweatshop) workers.” Overall, the conference was seen as a great success, with very positive consequences. The workshops and discussions culminated in the forming of a code of conduct that can be adopted by every school. Heather Fraser, one of the organizers, expressed her satisfaction at all that had been accomplished by the end of the weekend. “Everyone went away with something new - even students at the most experienced schools told us they learned a tot. There were two main reasons for that: not only did the keynote speakers shed light on issues many of us had not thought about before, but the workshops provided the opportunity for students at different schools to exchange ideas and learn from one another,” she said.

$nds t0 launcb$~ oqline appEca-

Ontarians on education SUSAN Imprint

hat role,

BUBAK staff

if any, should

the business sector play in funding post-secondary institutions? Does government

The University

Committee

on IST

determined last Friday that it was not necessary to put a barrier between UW computers and the Napster Web site, despite cancern

that the use vf Napster software is instrumental in the downloading of excessive MP3s, which are accused of clogging the wires, But users of Napster beware: IST staff will be investigz~ting and

dialup

servers

till be unavailable

at that time,

New. Web site The Library hti posted a new Web site TV provide users withimproved access to imurmation and services. The new site can be found at the same URL asthe old one+

funding need to be increased? Should Canada have private universities? An Angus ReidlGlobe andM&/Global Television survey of 1,000 adult Ontarians posed these and other education-related questions. The results, released on March 2, indicate that the vast majority of Ontarians (82 per cent) support “encouraging businesses to provide funding to certain post-secondary progrvs such as business schools.” Over half of those polled (5lper cent) strongly support, and 3.5 per cent somewhat support such funding. Veronica Chau, FedsVice-President of Education, had mixed feelings about private sector funding because, “So many times, [it] comes with strings attached that often compromise the integrity of a [post-secondary] institution.” .

She added that there is a role for private sector funding as long as it is %ery carefully managed.” Sixty-one per cent of Ontarians feel that government funding for post-secondary institutions “should be increased from current levels,” while 35 per cent feel that funding “should be maintained at current levels.” Chau sided with the maiority when she said that funding should definitely be increased. Ontarians are divided when it comes to creating private universities in Canada. Forty-eight per cent support and 49 per cent oppose “the establishment of one or more privately owned and operated universities in Canada.” Sixty-three per cent support “having universities specialize in certain programs, rather than having them all offer a wide range of programs as they do today.” Chau was unable to comment on the establishment of private universities in Canada as the Feds are still currently doing research on the issue.

Over half of those polled feel young adults should ‘@t a trade or skill at a community college” while 38 per cent feel that young adults should ‘cgo to university and get a general education.” Statistics Canada released an education report on February 21 that was based on a study conducted by the Pan-Canadian Education Indicators Program, in which Statistics Canada, the Council of Ministers of Education, Canada and the country’s Ministries of Education and training worked together to compile data on Canada’s education system. According to the report, Canada has one of the most highly educated populations in the world. More studentsaregraduatingfromhighschool and pursuing post-secondary education than ever before. Between 1990 and 1998, the percentage of Canadians aged 25 to 29 who did not have a high school diploma decreased from 20 per cent to 13 per cent, and the percentage of university graduates climbed from 17 per cent to 26 per cent.

Imprint,

Friday, March

IO, 2000

NEWS

Alternatives to school JERP,MY

TAYLOR lmprin t stat7

Studentsenjoytheiryummypancakes,courtesyofGroundZero.Thispast Tuesdaywas ShroveTuesday, known in sc~mecircles as PancakeTuesday.

Stewart scandal continued

from

page

to separate them from other federal payments,” he remarked. According to the HRDC Web site, money awarded through the training program would have been used to purchase courses for employment insurance recipients trying to reintegrate into the workforce. The Youth Program money would have been used to pay for internships or summer students somewhere within the University. “What I am certain of is that this money was spent on the thingsit was intended for,” noted Huber. “We have very regimented financial processes at this University to ensure that happens.” The Federation of Students spent their $2,638 paying for 1999 Frosh Orientation assistant January

Reutz. “She got more than all of that,” remarked VP Admin and Finance Josh Doig, indicating that the grant money only subsidized the wages that Reutz received. None of the 424 projects the Federal government has chosen to audit involve any of the money sent to UW. Several other Canadian Universities, however, did receive some extra attention from the scandal. The Universitk de Quebec had its $1.2 million in grant money examined, while the Universities of New Brunswick, Regina, Victoria and Toronto also had large grants looked into. The University of Toronto received more than six times as much money as UW in training programs and almost four times as much money in Youth Programs.

diverse group of studentsgathered in the Davis Centre Library Conference Room on Thursday, March 2, to discuss “Alternatives to School.” Led by Sean lee-popham, a freelance seminar coordinator from Toronto, the small assembly vented their frustrations with both the education process in general and the University of Waterloo specifically. Have you ever felt that the university atmosphere stifles creative thinking? Ever noticed a nasty unavoidable rift between faculties, or even departments? Ever felt as though you’re treated like a number, or a commodity? Perhaps you should have been at the discussion. You probably can’t deny having complained, at least once, about your catastrophic financial situation. After an initial brainstorming session on the faults of the university system, lee-popham let the evening flow freely, cutting in on the group conversation only to offer examples

from his own experiences, fending a very friendly, relaxed atmosphere to the discussion. “School teaches us how to think and not just what to think,” argued lee-popham, “and the how part is really dangerous. n One of his biggest beefs with the university structure was that after a few years of schooling, he felt desensitized, “I would see a homeless person on the street,” lee-popham offered, “and I’d think of the situation in an analytical way.”

asking, “After you’ve programmed that computer, what’s been programmed into you?” In keeping with his comfortable, humorous style, lee-popham joked about the focus on accreditation in a university setting. He lam&ted the fact that someone who has gained experiences for a number of years outside of school is often dismissed. Picturing the possibility of a mix between accreditation and “dropping out, ” he smiled while enacting his imagined scene: “Hey - he’s got a PhD in dropping out? Wow! That guy knows his shit!” Organizer Aylwin Lo, a UW student who heard about leepopham through a mailing list, participated in the discussion with the rest of the students. Part way through the evening, he cited an old adage as representative of some of UW’s problems: “Tell me and I forget; show me and I remember; involve me and I understand.” The purpose behind the meeting was not simply to gripe, however, and lee-popham steered the discus-

Have you ever felt that the university atmosphere stifles creative thinking? Ever felt as though you’re treated like a number, or a commodity?

He said that he was most frightened by his new way of thinking when he started to catch himself thinking of a homeless person, for example, as an essay subject. “I’d say, ‘I bet there’s a socioeconomic phenomenon at work here,“’ he laughed, but he went on to emphasize the importance of maintaining the ability to think for oneself with the necessary emotion. He concluded this short address eloquently,

continued

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NEWS

1Women’s amusements BRENDA special

Additionally, a display of zany vases were made on Wednesday whose results astonished even the creators. All of the art work is on display in the Womyn’s Centre and may be picked up by any of the artists. The final blow-out event of the week is destined to be the concert tonight (Friday, March 10) at Ground Zero. The spectacle will be headlined by Corduroy Leda, Erica Knight and Petra McPhail (a regular Bomber Open Stage performer). This is a benefit concert and will also celebrate the launch of “Voices of Women.” There is a limited quantity of tickets available at t.he Feds office for $5, or at the door for $6.

BRATTY to imprint

he celebrations of International Women’s Week at UW are once again well underway. Thus far, there has been a tremendous response by a diverse array of students, both female and male, to the featured activi-

ties. The finished sculptures created on Monday in the Student Life Centre would put a green face on Michelangelo. . Two wildly entertaining and thought-provoking videos (Under Wraps and The Opposite of&x> were shown in the Womyn’s Centre.

Imprint, Friday, March

AlternatiVes continued

from

Ontario universities predict shortage of professorsY

sion toward possible to school just before drew to a &se. ’

alrernatives the evening

ANDRE

COUSINEAU /mprifd

through

&h&l

end&

with field

.e~eriencethatcananlybefounp ‘j! Fhegrad-kw 1with& .,a@m sity .. context4 &kliti~nallj$ :

for

th~:.still interested in Ieuni& G&thin an educational +nvironmat, he spoke of diffetent &yles of schods, which &US. on +a -number of different aspects of learning. The School fur Designing a Society, for ex;ample, in Urbma, Illinois, Offersa program wherein teaching, learning and living expenses are all shared by the residents, As a resource for this angle of study, lee-popham suggested Am-Gramme, the magazine of the Alternative Education Resource Organization. The Web site for the School for Designing a Society can be found at www.designingsxiety.org.

Further resources include the Web sites www.ide&st.org andwww.edrev.org, which offer fists of internships in not-forprofit organizations. Dumb(ng Us Dowtl, a book by John Taylor Gatto, andkhu~&FaiE by John Hoit address problems with mandatory schooling. Also, a publica-

tioncalled Cmmtut~~kDkmtaty Women and men alike create goddesses in their image.

IO, 2000

staff

tudents entering Ontario universities in the near future may find themselves in larger and larger classes as enrollment increases and the amount of available professors diminishes. “There are already 2,000 fewer professors in the system than there were in 1991. Add to that, an astounding onethird of faculty are between 5.5 and 64 years of age and are faculty scheduled to retire just as student enrolment begins to crest,” said Dr. Deborah Flynn, President of the Ontario Confederation of University Faculty Associations (OCUFA) before the Standing Committee on Finance and Economic Affairs (Pre-Budget Hearings) at Queen’s Park. According to a study by Pricewaterhousecoopers LLP commissioned by the Council of Ontario Universities (COU), 9,600 new faculty will be required to accommodate faculty retirements and increased student .enrollment by the year 2010. According to the study, more than 88,900 additional students will wish to enroll in universities by that date due to changing demographics,

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increased participation rates and changing workplace requirements. Also, the so-called double-cohort of students due to arrive in 2002103 may cause universities to feel the pinch a little earlier. In addition to faculty required to accommodate these substantial enrollment increases, faculty age demographics demand that 5,500 new faculty be hired to accommodate retirements in the same time frame. With a time horizon of approximately three years required to rewill be cr~itfaculty, ontario universities must begin planning immediately

"9,600

additional

required to compensate for

additional problem of adding and replacing physical plant, the PricewaterhouseCoopers report suggests a required increase in capital of $1 to $2.5 billion. Of this predicted increase, whatever does not come from government and private funding will have to come in the form of tuition increases. “The government has commit*ted itself to creating a world-class university system. If this is to be something more than just rhetoric, it must ensure that it moves immediately to provide the resources and policies required to meet this objective,” Dr. Flynn concluded to the committee.

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lmprlllt UniversityofWaterlooStudentNewspaper

March 10,2000,Volume 22,Number 30

Staff Editor-in-Chief, linda o+ nagy Assistant Editor, Scott Gordon Forum, Mar&a Fread News, vacant, Brian App Arts, Ryan Matthew Merkley, Adina Gillian Sports, Kate Schwass, John Swan Features, Jon Willing, Janice Jim Science, renCe I. A. mercuri Photos, Wendy Vnoucek, Carrie Lindeboom Graphics, Ryan Price, Mike Habicher Web, Durshan Ganthan, Craig Wickie Systems Administrator, David Robins Proofreader, Heather Macdougall Proofreader, Jeremy Taylor Proofreader, Rod Locke Proofreader, Bruce Fraser Proofreader, vacant Business Manager, Mark Duke Advertising & Production Manager, Laurie Tigert-Dumas Advertising Assistant, Bahi Selvadurai Distribution, Rachel E. Beattie Distribution, Marissa Fread Board of Directors President, Robin Stewart Treasurer, Mike Habicher Secretary, Rachel E. Beattie Director-at-Large, Ryan Matthew Staff Liaison, Mar&a Fread

Merkley

Contributors Sarah Anderson, Rachel E. Beattie, Brenda Beatty, Mark Besz, Alison Brazier, Susan Bubak, Melissa Choong, Donna Cooper, Andr6 Cousineau, Betsy Dunbar, Nigel Flear, Warren Hagey, Linden Holson, Lisa Johnson, J.E Lewis, John Lofranco, CharIie Ma, Reuben Malcohoniuk, Marianne Miller, Evan Munday, Andrew O’Connor, Amy Potvin, Rob Robson, Alison Salter, Robin Stewart, Jothi Suntharampillai, Jared Thibeau, Billy Wheeler, Mike Yunker Imprint is the official student newspaper of the University of Waterloo. It is an editorialIy independent newspaper published by Imprint Publications, Waterloo, ti corporation without share capital. Imprint is a member of the Ontario Community Newspaper Association (OCNA). Imprint is published every Friday during fall and winter terms, and every second Friday during the spring term. Imprint reserves the right to screen, ‘edit, and refuse advertising. Imprint ISSN 07067380. Imprint CDN Pub Mail. Product Sales Agreement no. 554677. Address mail to:

The sameold whine W

hat can the government possibly give students that will finally shut usup about rising tuition fees? Month after month, students constantly speak out against both levels of government opportunities

for not giving them adequate to afford a post-secondary education. Reading outcries from student organizations like the Canadian Alliance of Student Associations (CASA) is becoming a monthly ritual and seemslike a perpetual whine. Last week, the Feds pushed a press release that claimed to give the new federal budget a C + , noting that the amount dedicated to postsecondary education is still not sufficient; however, in the midst of all the whining, do we even know what is sufficient?

Cost is relative for every student; what student X can afford may not be what student Y can afford. “Sufficient” seems to take the form of many varying costs: $1,000, $500, free. But, let’s not forget that cost is relative for every student; what student X can afford may not be what student Y can afford, This is one of the underlying problems with our fight for bearable tuition. A few weeks ago, I had a chance to meet with Kitchener-Centre Member of Parliament, Karen Redman, along with my writing colleagues at The Record, to discusscritical issues *facing Canadians, especially when millions of dollars were lost and a looming federal budget may dictate the future of a Liberal government, We discussed the rising cost of tuition and, to no surprise, there was a strong opinion that post-secon% costsexceededthe amount of what students can afford; but what can students afford? The notion of free tuition even entered our discussionswith some inter-

viewees

citing

the education-friendly

tuition

system in Europe. One thing can be guaranteed: tuition will never be free in Canada. Socialist notions of every &dent being able to attend a school of higher learning at no charge is nice to think about, but is nothing more than a pipe dream. At a time when universities are being swamped with increasing applications and overcrowding problems, free tuition would only complicate problems even more. Tuition is like the bouncer who dictates who can enter Club 54: only the right people need to come and, in this case, only people with a thick cheque book. This is the way the system is set up and it won’t change. Tuition helps regulate the number of applicants and, moreover, the number of admissions to universities. Consider a cost-free postsecondary education system: universities would be forced to raise admission requirements, which would result in potential Arts students, for example, needing a 90 per cent average to get into first-year studies. Maybe Computer Science students

in a referendum on a simple statement: should students pay any increase in tuition for the 2OOO/2001 year? I’m not quite sure what the students will prove by holding this vote, only something that all students have agreed on for a while. If the response comes back unanimously as “no,” the results will be sent to CASA and p.ress releases will be zipped off to university student news agencies across the country with a big headline reading, “Students vote for tuition freeze.” And, to editors’ frustrations, campus papers wiil be forced to publish stories on an issue that has been plaguing students for decades, but no new opinions will surface; only the same old whines will be paramount. -]on Willing 3A English RPW, Applied

Studies

would need 101 per cent and Engineers 105 per cent. I’m reluctant

assumethat every student would be happy with a total tuition abolishment; in some ways, paying tuition iswhat provides a certain amount of accomplishment for students.Besideseducational differences, tuition is what separates the college diploma from the university degree. Last week, students at the Universityof Guelph had the opportunity to vote

Sadly, Norman’s seeing-eye bear idea met with tragic failure.

Imprint Student Life Centre, born 1116 University of Waterloo Waterloo, Ontario, N2L 3Gl Tel: 5 19-888-4048 Fax: 5 1943847800 hctp://irqxint.uwaterloo.ca editor@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

term winds its way to an end, a lot fpmple axethinking about what to do ~~~~summer,Inc~y~ufiaveanydoubts, the backpacker’s tour&Europe is still one of tf;e mast awesume and mind-broadening experiences you can choose. - 1was lucky enough to go on a wicked European adventure with my best friend in 1998, and I want to dangle the adventure carrot in front of you and encourage you to jump on that plane and embark on the experience of a lifetime, The traditional spring/summer student tour some Canadians go on is something many of us grow up h&ring about, The stories from thes short-term nomadientice and intrigq with their,&s of sqokep bars in PzkS,’ ancient

in Athens

churches

and

endhm beer in Munich. V&S&~ sites I .had only ever seen in books was definitely i highlight of my tr& Wespentan entire &3~1oon in the Vaticti l

courtesy

UW Drama

.*.

.‘I..

.1.,&l...

ants SOpainstakingly perfected. We made 8 mad dash on the Metro (subway) in Paris to get .& acrosstF@w,:. to the Eiffel Tower, wolfing down dclicio@T’ called family of ,:’ crepes from a street vend.or along the wag$ :, years. They 1: : :-:3;s~~~~~d <;‘.y’.)’ A:“!‘: _:..to hear fromn 15 ~~~~ us that, within ~ ’ WC took in Big Ben, London Bridgetid‘<:, Buckingham P&e in London, the gloc~~~:~"~.~ho~~~,i~~~~were ( ,A+:.:,+:I., .’ at our youth hostel, whiskspiel in Munich and even the Red Light district’“‘;b&.-y ‘I*: ‘.’““’us away ..p ::_ on a tcrur of their city. Even ityou don’t have family in Europe,, :I in Amersterdam. among themselves have an in-:;i,i There can, however, be so much more to ’ac$$ackei$ ‘I. a European adventure than just seeing capital . &&lyu strong sense of community. YuUG ~.+~6&.~vell&~ across nations in mere day&J: cities md famous landmarks. A ccDnnection gc;. :.?::~<~. :q.., bti&&m,so ‘. with my past was something I neve lr_thought .I:.::::$=::.A::: I;::: @any people are travellinga ,.. * :+;y~p will often see the SZU&“’ abouztwhen I plunked down the cash for my Eurail pass, but it was undoubtedly a key in t& train in Budapest that you. : &S&S and then in Milan. shaping my trip into such an amazing experifirs4 @$aie & much with these peo$&,:”I... :.1 ence, So many Canadians are born of immigrant bc parents ed $+ sometimes travellers forget e about this link to .their past when they go ’ abroad+ During our tip we gath&ed up enough; nerve to cakousins we% never met bfoTe,and So3 gqj tell them we were “in the arean and askif they’d ,’ yean: 8’:q.::

1?1--

L-

-_a

L---At--

.II

--:-b-

Throwing

in the

towel

To #beEditor,

‘ve attended this university for five years now, and there are only two things that I’ve really learned: 1 All of the smart, hot girls are in Rec. 2. Some of the administrators at the University of Waterloo are not the sharpest tools in the shed. Now, you’re probably thinking thatmybeefiswithCo-op.No.Maybe the Registrar’s Office, then? Nice try. OK, the bartenders at the Bomber. Yeah, but they’re not administrators. The body that I’m ticked off with is the Athletic Department. Yes, the Athletic Department. They sit all high and mighty in their fortress of solitude (a.k.a. the PAC) and hide from the criticisms of the student body. Now, why would anyone have a beef with the Athletic Department, you might ask? I love playing and officiating Campus Ret sports, most varsity teams do well, and I’ve finally figured out how to get around in the PAC - the only square building you can get lost in. So what’s the problem? No friggin’ towels at Columbia Lake, hat’s wbat the jmblem is! Now for the life of me, I can’t figure out why the Athletic Department doesn’t put towels at the equipment desk, available for students, like the PAC does. Is it due to lack of washing facilities at Columbia Lake? No! Numerous Campus Ret sports are played at Columbia Lake, requiring uniforms that are laundered in washing machines and dryers directly behind the equipment desk. So, maybe it’s aquestion of logistics. Installed at the PAC is the easyto-use “Watcard Swipe-o-matic 2000” to sign out a towel on the way into the change room. Does Columbia Lake lack this computer system? No! When I sign out uniforms, soccer balls, hockey helmets, etc., I use my Watcard in the same fashion. Now, you’re probably thinking to yourself, “Ian, you tubby bitch, why don’t you just bring a towel with you, shower and leave it in the lockers provided at Columbia Lake, ready for your next Campus Ret game?” Well, first of all, I’m not fat, I’m just big boned. Secondly, I would do this but, according to Athletic Departl

$ORT

ment policy, I can’t leave a lock on a locker at Columbia Lake longer than 24 hours or it will be removed. Plus, I’m not about to tote around a wet towel, possibly soaking my Ymportant” notes from the “inspiring” lectures I receive at this fine academic institution. So please, would someone in the Athletic Department bring over some towels to Columbia Lake, so I can shower and finally pick-up one of these smart, hot Ret girls? Because really, it’s the only thing that’s holding me back.

Canada and only applies to Canadian engineers. It is a graduation into the engineering profession. The ceremony is only completed when the engineer passes away and the ring is returned to his or her school. The rings are then passed on t9 the next generation of engineers coming out of that school. Hopefully, some of you will realize that secret proceedings don’t always indicate silly ceremonies, -1. Matthew 28 Planning

Bleuins

- Ian Gallaway 4B Mechanical Engineering

And

again.

. .

’

To the Editor,

engineering

stuff

To the Editor,

would like to preface this letter with a word of thanks to all of the volunteers who put forth the effort to produce Imprint. It is a joy to read and an easy way of keeping track of the big news on campus. In this spirit of informing people, I would like to help David Robins clarify some things. I will be the first to agree that engineers seem to have an affinity for ceremonies and rituals. I am not going to pass judgement on them or their practices, but I am going to shed a little light on the Iron Ring ceremony. Right about now, the engineers are probably ready to strangle me, because the proceedings of the Iron Ring ceremony are secret. The important fact to clear up here isn’t what happens, but why it happens. Mr. Robins did not appear to understand the motivation behind the Iron Ring ceremony. Having an engineer for a father, I have had occasion to ask about the ring on his pinky finger. Here&he deal: the ring is traditionally made from cold steel from some engineering disaster failed system to remind young engineers of their fallibility. In those days, civil engineering was the dominant discipline and steel was the construction material-of choice. The ceremony was created by Rudyard Kipling {of Jungle Book fame) under commission by the Engineering Institute of

his letter is in response to the uneducated ramblings of the CS student that decided to flame the Engineering Dept. and all it stands for. Whether he cares to know or not, the Engineering Ring is a symbol and a reminder to all Engineers that we have a duty to do all that we can to ensure the safety of those who would m&e use of our designs, be it a bridge, a car, a microwave, an elevator, anything. The Ring is worn on the little finger of the working hand by any Engineer so that it will make a “clink” on the table when the Engineer is working to remind him (or her) of their responsibility. “The Ritual of the Calling of an Engineer has been instituted with the simple end of directing the newly qualified engineer toward a consciousness of the profession and its social significance and indicating to the more experienced engineer their responsibilities in welcoming and supporting the newer engineers when they are ready to enter the profession.” http://www.ironring.ca Whether you like it or not, your life is in our collective hands every minute of every day. Perhaps some people see this ritual as archaic and aggrandizing, but if being an Engineer was easy, maybe bridges, cars, microwaves, and elevators would fall apart as often as computer programs do. -Adrian Ennis 3AMecbanical Engineering

‘N NEWTON WAN

MUNDAY

Silly

engineers

To the Editor,

hile the Iron Ring Ceremony (IRC) itself is not a silly thing, there were some silly activities happening on campus that are associated with the.IRC. First of all, there were a group of engineers who were making tons of noise in ‘the Davis library, yelling, “We are the engineers!” (Hence we were able to identify them). If we were studying for an exam that day, we would be pretty annoyed by these people since they went around the entire library at least three separate times. Later that day, an engineer in a pink Elvis suit approached us videotaping for the IRC. Twenty minutes later, we saw four engineers dressed in some space suits with some flashing neon lights. While the IRC itself is not silly, the ridiculous activities of the engineers do demean the value of IRC.

societies might be is only diverting attention from our own problem. Blind loyalty does no one any justice. Getting rid of racism in a society is a huge and never ending task. It is easy to fiIter information so that we only hear what we want to hear, for instance, refusing to believe that Canada might have. been founded on racist ideals and is still operating on these ideals to some degree. I’m not advocating cynicism but it is never a good idea to put too much faith in powerful institutions like the police, the media, or the government. These institutions don’t always teli us the truth. Why won’t the province hold an inquest if they have nothing to hide? The only way that we can change the racism that still exists in our society is to acknowledge it and work from there. -Marg Wall 3rd year Women’s

Absurd

Studies

expressions

-ccbristopb~smitb~~tbo~~cb~g 3A EntiSciJBus. & IB Physics To the Editor,

Simply

deceitfut.

To the Editor,

was surprised to read Ryan O’Connor’s response to Davin Charney’s article in the February 11 issue of Imprint. To describe the events surrounding Dudley George’s death at Stoney Point as “a clash in the park with Natives,” in which the OPP was merely ‘involved’ is simply deceitful. The “clash” was actually a planned, armed attack instigated by the government against an unarmed group of people, with the OPP acting as their willing army. To say that this was not a racist incident is untrue. What about the threats made to Dudley George be-

fore his murder, and the memorabilia created by the OPP after the murder, sporting the logo Team Ippenwsb? If this isn’t racist, what is? The police are far from innocent and don’t deserve your generous defence. I was also disturbed at the pains that you went to in order to show how racist other societies were. To imply that racism in Canada is mainly a historical issue is the understatement of the year. I might go so far as to ask how you dare to say it. Making such an issue of how racist other

‘m glad we live in a society where nothing by means of idea or thought is forbidden. Not just because it provides us human beings with a great resource to learn and develop from but also because it provides us with a great source of comic relief when someone comes up with an absurd, confrontational, idiotic and pointless idea or expression. When Jeffrey Shallit was publicly attacked by Erika Kubassek, I was rather amused. The arguments Erika Kubassek used were so horribly flawed, I was quite startled Professor Shallit even bothered to respond to them. Ignoring the quite obvious fact continued

to page

The Forum Section enables members of the University of Waterloo community to present views on various issues through letters to the editor and longer comment pieces. Letters shouId not exceed 350 words in length. Letters must be signed, including a phone number. Letters will not be printed if the Editor-in-Chief cannot identify the author. They can be submitted to: ktters@imprint.uwa~rloo.ca. Letters received in elect tronic form (e.g. fax & email) willnotbeprintedunlessaphone number for verification is included. All material is subject to editing for brevity and clarity. The editor reserves the right to refuse to publish let ten or ar ticles which are judged to be libellous or discriminatory on the basisofgender, rade, religionor sexual orientation. The opinions expressed through columns, comment pieces, letters andother articles are strictly thoseofthe authors, not the opinions ofImprint.

Imprint,

Friday, March

continued

from

page

that, as part of our democratic social infrastructure, freedom of expression should be endorsed, not repressed. What I found confusing about Erika Kubassek’sattack was the main “immorality” issues she was addressing. Immorality of what? Just because the university isn’t hiding porn doesn’t automatically imply it’s shoving it into the faces of each and every student (or did I miss out on a mass email from Shallit informing all of us impressionable students that are now almost certainly going to become sex offenders that the “Porn is up!!!“and it’s “Time to Partay ! !“), and certainly neither is Shallit. Whether or not an individual decides to explore such material is their own god-given personal moral choice. And unless you plan to put restrictions on what they are allowed to think, as Iongas they don’t attempt to influence others against their wiIl,who cares what types of information they decide to expose themselves too? If Erika Kubassek wishestocontinue campaigning against morality with inane presentations, then at the very least she should consider going into them armed with stronger facts than just a gut feeling towards what’s wrong and what’s right. -Adam Munro 3AComputerScience

choice

To the Editor,

n response to the “God loves you” column in the Friday, March 3, 2000 issue of Imprint. “Life or death? It’s a simple choice that each one of us makes whether to believe in Jesus Christ and have life, or to not believe and perish.” Interesting way of furthering the good news of Jesus Christ. I don’t retail Him teaching us to use scare and force tactics like this upon the weak minded to gain their support. Don’t get me wrong, I have the utmost respect for the beneficial teachings of Jesus Christ but I believe that respect of others and their beliefs is extremely important - no one has a monopoly on truth, in my humble opinion!! -hkme

withheld

vs.

by request

uwo

To the Editor,

s a fourth-year honours student ‘n sociology, I find the UW library return policy very inconvenient and unamenable to student’s needs. By comparing this university’s return policy with that of the University of Western Ontario, it seems that UW’s

library

is in need of a change.

At Western, books may be taken out for 28 days and late fees are not put into place until (a) the book is recalled or(b) the book is overdue for 3 0 days. At Waterloo, the policy is quite

FORUM

IO, 2000 different. Students may take out books for just two weeks, after which a late fee of 50 cents per day is activated. This becomes especially problematic for students doing Iarger projects, as they often need access to certain books over a full term. At Western, students only need to renew books once in order to have them for a full four months. At Waterloo, students must renew books seven times to have access tomaterials over the same period. I believe that students [particularly those working on larger thesis projects) need much more time with, books than two weeks. It would be nice if we could have a system where students could concentrate on their schoolwork rather than routinely renewing books. Let’s relax the return policy of the University of Waterloo’s library system. Student’s rising tuition costs, if not their hard work, earn them the right to fair library policy, --TonyPudde#7but# 4th year Socioiogy

Getting

the shalt

To the Editor,

s is now becoming clearer than ever, the Ontario government is intent on starving the humanities and social sciences out of a primary role in higher education. We, as students and as people, will lose a lot out of this, including one thing we all covet-choice. I chose my major because I want my life to reflect who I am. I hope that is the same for everyone. For myself, I don’t want to work for Core], Intel or Microsoft. I simply don’t want what it is they offer, I want to be a citizen first and an economic unit by accident, or as a matter of course. Had I not been good enough for Computer Engineering, I would not want to have been shuffled into an IT vocational school. As a person, I need to see myself in a context other than market demand. For most of usin the Arts and Social Sciences, we are here because of choice. I am doing and studying what I love. While the value of an Arts degree does lie in the fact that I will be able to make a good living, the healthy survival of these programs means more than that. We’re not here by default. Options other than an Arts degree were and will be open to each and every one of us. I hope that I’m right in saying that everyone has a reason for what they study in school and do in their working lives. I have deliberately chosen an education that will not slot me into an immediate labour market need. l am a fee-paying student. I don’t want to be a cog. Don’t force me to be a Computer Engineer.

-Nathan 4NSociology

Young

Gas pains not curable by antacids H

ate to be the bearer of bad news to everyone here, but it’s looking like the gas prices are not going down any time soon. Quite the contrary in fact, they are actually going to go up. Way up. And guess what? It’s apparently not going to stop being like this until about next year, Yippie Skippy. Now this is only a prediction done by the U.S. Energy Department. They are saying that prices will jump by about 13 per cent by the summer, which means that prices will gouptoabout83centsalitre.Sounds great, doesn’t it? Here’s an even better tidbit: even if the Organization of Petroleum Exporting Countries increases production at their March 27 meeting, it still won’t help us at all. Looks like I’ll be getting lots of exercise in the next little bit, maybe eating more fruits and vegetables, taking the bus more. Oh wait, they are also going to be affected. Truckers will charge more for shipping the

goods, so prices at your grocery store, retailers and anywhere else that has to ship via truck will go up as well, according to how far they have to be transported. And if you want to take the bus, fine, but if they aren’t running with natural gas, then you could be paying more for your rides around town too. Feeling better? I’m not. Icommute everyday, as do hundreds of thousands of people, and I’m feeling the pinch badly, just like they are. Pretty soon, it’ll be hard to pay my gas bill to get to work to pay my gas bill. Or, 1’11have to start trying to cut costs in other ways, like buying bulk Spam tins and a filter inside my faucet so I can drink water from the tap. Walk to work, maybe, even though it may take a bit of time (I workin GueIph). Course, maybe that day-long hike wouldn’t be so bad? Or perhaps make a bunk for myself in the stock room at my work. AI1 I have to do is bring extra clothes and wash them in the sink.

Or not. I’m not that anal. I’d rather start selling my shit then doing that. But maybe this is a good time to start trying to find other means of transportation. Like more encompassing bus and train systems. They’d cost more at first, but if more people started using them, their prices would actually start to decline, only jumping to support the increase in users by adding trains and buses into the systern. Find more efficient energy sources like natural gas, electricity and the like. Hell, I think it’d be pretty cool to see a nuclear powered GO train, running from Thunder Bay to Toronto at speeds of 180 kph, wouldn’t you? All I’m saying is that we had better find something else pretty soon, because cars could go the way of the dodo and we could make this world a better place in the process. Or I could just be getting high off the gas fumes here.

Dr. Marilyn Waring at UW M

eeting Dr. Marilyn Waringwill change your perceptions of justice, economics and the worth of your own work forever. DavidSuzuki has said of this world-renowned political economist, feminist, and author: u [Marilyn] penetrates to the heart of the global, ecological and social crisis that afflicts the world.” She will be SpeakinginUWArts Lecture Hall room 116 on Tuesday, March 14 at 7:30 p.m. and admission is $5 waged and $2 unwaged. In 1975,22-year-old Marilyn became Chairperson of the Public Expenditures Committee. She travelled to over 35 countries in this capacity and discovered that the rules that governed the finances of her own country were operating worldwide. Marilyn also discovered that our international accounting systems do not count many things-notably the work of women and the cost of environmental damage. Women account for more than 50 per cent of the world’s population, yet hold no more than 10 percent of the seats in national legislatures. Marilyn takes a hard Iouk at the disparity between what women contribute to communities and how their work is valued. By approaching economics and politics from the viewpoint of an average citizen, Marilyn challenges

the rest of us - the vast majority pay the price. She makes a convincing argument for changing an economic system that does not value clean air, water, and the unspoiled ecosystems that sustain and enrich life on earth. AfeministeconornistwithaPh.D. in Political Economy, a development consultant who has worked in more than a dozen countries, a farmer and an activist for “female human rights,” Marilyn is currently Associate Professor in Social Policy and Social Work at Massey University in Auckland, New Zealand. In 1997, she received a British Council Award to travel to London to participate in the British Council Seminar on Women, Human Rights, Culture and Tradition. She was also awarded a Massey University Research Fellowship for 1998. Her views have been published many times in books and international publications. Her first

the

book,Jf

assumption

that

international

business systems are adequately meeting the needs of both local and global communities. Using plain language laced with ironic humour, she makes it clear that classic economics work to benefit one particular group, while

tional Film Board production entitled “Who’s Counting?” Her latest bookisTheT~&&zquer&esZq.&ity, Work and Human fights. Get on the bus to Sarnia! On Saturday, March 18 people from around Ontario will be gathering in Sarnia to support the Stoney Point First Na-

tion and their right to self-determination. The event coincides with Dudley George’s birthday which would have been on March 17. Also planned are local actions on Friday, March 17 in Toronto, Guelph and K-W (and maybe London, Kingston and Oakville). If interested in going to Sarnia on a bus, contact WPIRG.

Women

counted: The New Feminist Economics, released in 1989, was the basis of a Canadian Na-

9 caught

himsrrcking

on yaw

Yoke.”

FORUM

Imprint, Friday, March

IO, 2000

“If vou had not come to university, Fread & what would you be doing?” Marissa Scott Gordon

“Living in a van down by the river .” Craig Fowler Musters LED

“Travelling. ”

“Playing basketball,”

Sandy Kiang 13 ERS

Kent Marten IBERS

“Explaining to my parents why I wasn’t in university.” Rob Waiser 3A Mutb

“Making my career asa professional waitress.” Chantal Fortin 3 N Psychology

“Hanging Hefner.”

“Become a wedding ordinator.” Arti Sanichara IB ERS

out with Hugh

co-

Chad Pullen ZB Psychology

“I’d be rubbing Granny’s corns! ” Scott Patterson 100th year Universal Studies

Scott Cormier & Waiter DePinho

2nd year Pre-optmnetry

“Stripping.”

“Working in a foreign country.” Elsa Offord & Gifty Asantewaah

1B Science

Think about a career in

Human Resources or Financial Planning. Human

George Brown College offers fast-track programs in Resources and Financial Planning starting in May 2000.

If you have a Bachelor of Arts or Communications degree, with credits in Social Sciences, English, Micro/ Macroeconomics, Mathematics, and Computer Literacy, you qualify for an intensive diploma program (2 yearsin 1) start in May and graduate in April, 2001. (“If you have only earned two years towards your degree, you may still qualify for advanced standing.) Human Resources - Gain practical skills in human resources administration, You will also be ready to write provincial exams for your Certified Human Resources Professional (CHRP) designation.

services sector, many move on to careers as investment advisors. To find out more, consider attending an Information Session on March 22 or March 29. Location: St. James Campus, 200 King St. East, Toronto, ON. (Check for room location in the main lobby.)

For further information about Human Resources, contact Suzanne Kavanagh at (416) 4152276; for Financial Planning, contact Leo Suokas at (416) 4152010. Visit our website at www.gbrownc.on.ca

financial Planning -The Canadian Securities Course is part of the curriculum; in fact, this rxoaram covers the courses needed for

students

write

the

Financial

Planners

Standards Council of Canada (FPSCC) examination, which leads to the Certified Financial PlannerTM [CFPTM) designation. Graduates work in the growing financial

GEORGE BROWN

Freestorespromote a cashlesssociety Your Marty McSorley rookie card might be worth something after all SARAH

ANDERSON spe’cial to imprint

magine a store where everything is free; a store where people are welcome to take anything they want, without paying a cent. These are the sorts of stores little kids dream about -but free stores are not just a figment of dreamy imaginations. They are popping up across the world as real solutions to problems cf overconsumption and poverty. In fact, a variation on the free store idea -a barter table -will be popping up in the SLC on March 16 in the Great Hall. A free store is a joyful kind of place that promotes community while diverting “waste” from landfill sites. People bring their unwanted stuff-from wool sweaters to kitchen tables, from CDs to bicyclesto the store where volunteers sort the items. Those same people who donate their things, along with anyone else who is interested, can take anything that they would like from the store. I had the opportunity to visit a free store while working on a farm on Cortes Island, B.C., two summers ago. I helped myself to a couple of good books, and was informed that the straw hat I wore while weeding

was the result of a previous worker’s find at the free store. Levi, the farm’s resident four-year-old, loved his trips to the free store, where he could

while increasing the community’s accessibility to material goods like clothes and furniture and shower curtain rods. By creating such a popular store, the islanders were able to create a more sustainable way of living on the island. However, the people of this island had a lot of motivation to create a successful free store. They live in a community where it is expensive to bring new materia1 goods into the community, or ship out wastes. In southern Ontario we have &f&j= by Ryan easy access to I material goods, trade in his old toys for %ew” ones and we are for the most part able to while his parents chatted with the ship our garbage out of town to be volunteers. dealt with. Although I loved the idea The idea for the store develof a free store, I wondered, on my oped asa means of helping this isoreturn to Waterloo, whether the conlated community reduce its garbage cept would work as well here,

There is one main difference between our community and the community on Cortes Island. Any negative impacts on the environment created by the islanders’ way of living can be seen clearly within their community, whereas in our community the impact of our way of living, though no less real, tends to be hidden and dispersed. The motivation to live a more sustainable lifestyle in our community is just not as apparent to us, What is readily apparent, however, is that we can save money through initiatives like free stores, There is enough stuff out there already, if we could only share it around a bit more. The richest fifth of the world has 74 times more money than the poorest fifth of the world, and there is a growing gap between the richness of the rich, and the poorness of the poor; 1.3 billion people across the world live on less than $1 a day. Initiatives such as free stores empower those at the lower income end of the scale by enabling people to have the things they need without having to spend as much money. By trading our “junk” at the Barter Table on March 16 we can promote sharing and fight overconsumption in much the same

ways that the free store on Cortes Island does. People can drop off any tradeable things (clothes, CDs, books, pots, pans, etc) in designated boxes at the Turnkey Desk, in the WPIRG office, or in the Environmental Studies Coffee Shop. They can then pick up a coupon for each item, and can

1.3 billion people across the world live on less than $1 a day. use that coupon at the Barter Table to take anything that catches their eye. Or, if you’re not the kind of person to plan ahead, just show up at the Barter Table with your things on March 16 and trade them in then. Anything left over will be donated to local drop-in centres and thrift stores. Who needs to shop at the mall when you can, shop at the Barter Table in the Great Hall?

Students cover all bases Club seeks to help all Waterloo Region charities

MARIHX Imptw

FREAD ,siatg

naive, dill weed and dt+ Mix the ingredients well. 3.

ROB ROEB~ON special

to Imprint

Chicken and Bmccoli Braid are the following: to raise funds and awareness for local charities, to foster good relations between the university and the surroundingcommunity and to get students more active in their school and community. The society abides by its constitution,similar to other clubs at the University. A board of governors, made up of directors, maintains financial information, promotions, public relations and research. Elec-

he Students for Society organization is one of University of Waterloo’s newest and fastest growing clubs. Only a month old, there are more than 3 0 members dedicated to improving society by helping local under-funded, non-profit organizations through fun fundraising events. Their first event, the “1.000 Push-Up Challenge,” is benefiting the Big Brothersof KW. Big Brothers helps young boys by providing positive role models and guidante. The Students for Society organization was founded by two first year students, Rob Robson and Joe Suave, who saw there ‘was a need for a climb t 0 focus on iharitahl(: groups. The StF&nts For Soiiety’smaill objectives Students ForSociety:That

bookiswaitingforyourJohn

tions are held democratically; that is, board directors are elected based on members’ votes. Each member has the right to run for office and provide opinions that may contribute to the organization’s proceedings. The “ 1000 Push-Up Challenge” entails participants collecting sponsorships from friends and family, and then attempting to complete 1000 push-ups over the course of eight hours. Waterloo studentswill gather their strength and face this challenge on March lXthintheSLCCommon Room. Further information regarding Students for Society and their future events may be obtained from their Web site, http:// www.geocitics.com/ studentsforsociety. The Web site includes the organization’s const ttu tion and details on upzomirig Hancock. cvcnts and meetings.

;

Inpdmts: 2 cups mMchicb* chopped intosmallqtuzres I cup bnxxoli, chopped intom& Pi= Mcupchopp edredpepper 1 czipsbreddedcbeese (yourcboice) Z pressedgarlic clove l/2 cup mayonnaise 1 teuspomdrieddill weed (qhzuI) 1/4 teuspaon salt 2 puckagas refigmtedcmmt rolls 1 egg white, lightly beaW~ 2 trzblespoons slivered almonds 1. 2. large and over

Preheat oven to 375°F.’ Put chicken and broccoli into bowl and mix. Add pepper cheese. Then, press garlic the mixture. Add mayon-

Unroll

one pxkage

of cres-

cent dough; do not separate. Arrange longe&des width of U’xlY’

of &ugh baking

across

sheet. Repeat with remaining package of duugh. Sea1 perfurations along ‘1

dough, 4. On longest sides of dough, cut into strips of 1% ihches apart and 3 inches deep. Spread filling evenly over middle of dough. To braid, lift strips of dough across mixture, twisting each strip one turn to meet in centre, and rolling the excess towards the middle. Continue alternating strips to form a braid. Tuck ends up to form a rim at the end of the braid. 5. Brush egg white over dough and sprinkle with almond slivers. Bake 25 - 28 minutesor until deep golden brown. Makes about 10 servings.

EEATURES

Imprint,

Friday, March

IO, 2000

OVE 0

ver a lunch of beer and twodollar sandwiches from the Bomber’s new deli, Chris Farley is continuously exchanging hellos or shaking hands with fellow patrons. When you’re the zcw Feds president elect, it seems that the student pub is where everybody knows your nam2. Granted, the name C hris Farley is nut a hard one to remember. When he ran for a seat on the 1998 Student Senate, Farley was forced to use a photocopy of his driver’s license in his campaign posters to prove that the name on the ballot was a valid one, not merely a flippant reference to chat deceased comedian of rwtorious girth. This year, he began some of his election addresses with, “Hi, I’m Chris Farlcy. I’m not dead and I’m running to be your President.” I-Ie didn’t find it too funny and neither did many of his listeners. “Half the time, it didn’t get laughs. So we stopped using it,” explains Farley, who, neatly groomed and sporting a tucked-in Oxford shirt, looks more like a junior board member than a slovenly SNL star. The world of political hits and misses is not a new one for Farley, who has been a member of the Liberal Party of Canada since he was 14 years old. “I got a bad mark on a [high school] midterm,” Farley recalls with

a smile, “And my parents were afraid I would become a drug dealer.” In order to keep young Chris on the straight and narrow, Mr. and Mrs. Farley encouraged their son to take up extracurricular activities and a young politician was born. Since then, he has become a poster-boy Farley: doesn’tlivein avandown by the river. for community involvement, serving as co-chair of the Mayor’s Advisory After his unsuccessful run for Board on Youth for the City of President last year, common sense Kitchener and taking part in numermight have told Farley not to try his ous volunteer organizations. Even luck at the Feds election again. “Jt his beer of choice, Sleeman’s Honey may sound, I don’t know kind of Brown, is bottled and brewed locally. corny, ” he explains, “but, I still felt Although Farley ordered an egg that I had something to offer stusalad sandwich, his obvious appredents.“This includes his commitment ciation for practicality and efficiency to improving campus safety and ensuggests that he’s more of a meat and couraging better communication bepotatoes kind of guy. The fourthtween students, elected representayear History student decided not to tives and administrative bodies. major in Political Science because a While he admits that the prosfirst-year class proved “too theoretipect of losing another election was a cal” for his liking. concern, the practical Farley made As well, when asked which phisure he put last year’s experience to losophers he aligns himself with, good use in this year’s campaign. Farley cites Locke and Hobbes, who “The only mistake you make is the believed that reality could be made one you make twice,” he reasons, intelligible and compatible with com“Everything else is a learning experimon sense. ence.”

in Natural

Heakh

his week marks a landmark for UW’sgay and lesbian organization, GLOW. It was 29 years Ago when the group held its first meeting on M;lrch 8, 1971. Looking over the history of the org~niz~~tion, it is quite remarkable how life for gays and lesbians bar changed, and how the group has changed. The group srarted up 3s tile Waterloo Universities’ C;‘ly Liberation i2;iovement (WI:Gl,hl, pronounced “wug-lum”). As the name suggests, it served students at both the University of Waterloo and the Waterloo LutheranUniversity (now Laurier). Furthermore, the focus of the group was activist in nature, although there has always been a consistent emp hasis on providing social and discussion groups. Since commercial gay bars did not exist in the I970s, WUGLM organized dances on a fairly regular basis. Many members also participated in “zaps”at heterosexual clubs. In a zap, a group of gay men and lesbians would pair off as straight couples. When the group felt reasonably secure, the couples would switch to homosexual pairs, much to the amazement of others at the club. Although the stunt was quite strenuous for all involved, it was also quite exhilarating. The group has also been involved with various newsletters and publications to voice advocacy for gays and lesbians. At the time of WUGLM, very little positive information existed about homosexuality. Several members received a grant from the government’s Opportunities for Youth program in 1973 to address this is-

sue. The resulting book, Project Socrates, was embraced by members of the gay iommunity.

The group has had scvcrd organizationA and name changes over the last 29 yexs. For much of the 1980s and 1990s the organization was known as the Gay and Lesbiljn Liberation of Waterloo (GLLOW). In 1995, Feds switched the org~rlization from aclub to a service. Thus, the need to maintain membership lists and collect club fees became obsolete. In 1998, the group adopted the less-militant name, Gays and Lesbians of Waterloo (GLOW). GLOW’s 2.Sth anniversary in 1996 was cause for much celebration. The guest speaker, federal MP Svend Robinson, spoke to an audience of 250. GLUW’s3Oth anniversary next year should prove to be equally impressive. No formal plans have been made, but anyone interested in helpingshouldcontactGLOWviaemai1. As Canada’s second-oldest student-run organization for gay and lesbians, GLOW has provided fellowship and support for thousands of queer people and provided a sounding board for activism and change. It is appropriate that as we look forward to CL0 W’s third decade, we also appreciate the work that went into getting this far.

Care

What

Chimjwactic

careers can you pursue at Northwestern Health Sciences University? Inteptive health and wellness l Acupunaure . Oriental medicine l Therapeutic Northwestern Health Sciences University provides the widest range of choices in natural health care in the United States.

The foundation of the University is Northwestern College of Chiropractic, which has earned an international reputation in 58 years as a pioneer in chiropractic education, patient care and scientific research,The individual attention and access to educational resources our

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students receive helps them excel in preparing to practice as outstanding health care practitioners. Combined with our pioneering clinical education programs and our assistance in job placement, Northwestern provides a superb educational experience.

Thoselazy, hazydaysofwinter?Students have beenenjoyingabnormally mild weather this week by flocking to bar patios or lounging in grassy fields.

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Imprint,

Friday, March

IO, 2000

FEATURES

13 the others; this will only add to your debt problem How you deal with this situation now wit1 affect your credit rating in the future. Collection agenciesare hired b>companies to contact individuals who have not made minimum payments and “encourage” them to do so. They are under regulations, which prohibit harassment. If you are being harassed by a collection agency, you may direct your complaint to the Ministry of Consumer and Commercial Relations. In order to address this complex problem, you may find assistance at Catholic Family Sewices in Kitchener. They provide help to individuals in this situation and can advise you on such matters as amalgamation of debt, repayment plans, relief from collection agencies, cancellation of credit cards and budget management. All information in this article was obtained from Catholic Family Counselling, 70 Weber Street West, Kitchener. You can contact the Ombudsperson at SLC room 2 128, 888-4567 ext. 2402.

AskThe - ’ Ombudsmenon 111

For Godso hmi his only begotten believetb in him have euerhsting

the world, that hegave Son, that whosoever should not p&b, but life. (John 3: 16)

ast week, we saw the great contrast between life and death, and God’s wonderful mercy and grace toward us. This week we will finish off the verse as we consider the opportunity that each one of us has to have everlasting life by believing in God’s Son, the Lord Jesus Christ. The possibility of avoiding judgment has often been mentioned and as a sinner, that’s really your only concern. However, putting your faith in Christ doesn’t only let you escape condemnation; it also gives you eternal life. What is everlasting, or eternal life? It is not simply an unending existence, for even unbelievers will have that as they suffer eternal torment in the lake of fire. It is rather a quality of life, as the Lord Jesus explained: “I have come that they may have life and that they may have it more abundantly.” (John 10: 10) When you trust in Jesus Christ

as your Saviour, an amazing thing takes place. You are “born again”not another physical birth, but a spiritual birth. The heart of the Lord’s message to Nicodemus in John 3 was the necessity of being born again, for “Unless one is born again, he cannot see the kingdom of God.”

God offers each of us eternal life so that we might know Him. The apostle Paul wrote of this as well: “Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; old things have passed away; behold, all things have become new.” (2 Corinthians 517) A remarkable transformation

happens when someone receives Christ into their life. Many people try to live a good life on their own, but a reformation of character isn’t enough. A complete regeneration by the power of God is necessary. Don’t let worries or unanswered questions hold you back. Even if you had all your questions answered, you’d still be on your way to Hell. Believe in Jesus Christ and you .will receive the gift of eternal life. At that very instant, God Himself will come and five within you in the person of the Holy Spirit and “He will guide you into all truth” (John l&13). God offers each one of us eternal life so that we might know Him. For the believer, all of eternity will be spent getting to know God and glorifying Him. What a wonderful privilege it is to know the Almighty God of the universe! Hear the Lord Jesus in His prayer to His Father: “And this is eternal life, that they may know You, the only true God, and Jesus Christ whom You have sent.” Uohn 17:3). To God be the glory.

During my first year of school at UW, I applied for and receiv?d a credit card. Now in my second year, I have three credit cards, all of which are maxed out. Yesterday, a company phoned me and said that if I didn’t make the minimum payment, I would be subpoenaed to court. I can’t make a minimum payment on any of these cards because I don’t have any money. In fact, when I called the card companies, two of them were unwilling to give me some time to make the minimum payment. Should I declare bankruptcy? Should I get another credit card and use a cash advance to pay the minimum on the other cards? A It is unwise to order another n credit card in order to pay off

Deli arrives at Bomber The Bombshelter Deli Student Life Centrc, UW +*** out of 5

SCOTT

GORDON

imprint

staff

his week the Bomber expanded its lunch repertoire to include a deli menu, the centerpiece of which are fresh, homemade sandwiches. Not very exciting, you say. Anyone can make a sandwich. But let’s be honest, making a good one is harder than it looks. Getting it just right can be difficult. Well, I’m happy to report that the Bomber manages to get it mostly right. Although they lured us in this week with their special introductory prices ($2.00 + tax), their sandwiches were tasty enough that we’d gladly pay the regular price ($2.95 + tax). There are four different breads to choose from: white, whole wheat, multi-grain and marble rye. This week, they were all fresh and sliced thick right in front of you. When it comes to what goes on that bread, there’s more choice than you might expect. There’s the standard range of different meats including ham, turkey, roast beef, corned beef and chicken salad. There’salso the equally standard extras like lettuce, tomatoes, onions and olives. In addition

to all of these, rhough,

they throw

Over the course of the week, we here at Imprint did our best to try a number of different sandwich combinations and few, if any, were disappointing. Everything was fresh and seem to be a little tastier than what you find at some of the chain sandwich places. And those of us adventurous enough to want roasted red peppers on our sandwiches (they look kind of slimy and can be somewhat unappealing to the uninitiated) were pleased with the result. It was also nice to see the number of vegetarian options on offer. On top of the fresh veggie fillings and the roasted peppers, they also offer egg salad and roasted eggplant. And for those not into sandwiches there are a few other options, including pita served with hummus and tzatziki. It would have been nice to see some kind of side option other than

chips. They’re cheap and that helps keep the price of lunch below three bucks, but carrot sticks or celery might be something for the Bomber toconsider maybe adding later on in the term for those who want it. The Bomber also still has some kinks to work out behind the counter. Although the staff were all friendly and eager to please, they were still a little disorganized this week. There seemed to be a lot of unnecessary running around and some details (like who wants cheese on their sandwich) got lost in the confusion. Bomber staff also seem to have underestimated the turnout given the long line-ups. In the end, any problems experienced were small and easily corrected. If the Bomber maintains its fresh ingredients and keeps the prices low, you really can’t go wrong.

ALTERNATIVE

The Bomber: not just

and spicy friesany more.

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things like roasted peppers, which provide a welcome break from the routine. All the sandwiches are served with potato chips and a slice of garlic dill pickle.

University Shops Plaza, 170 University Ave. West II

VIDEII

Mr-”

FEATURES

JR.

Lewis

es, I have been there. I have gone west. It was my first reading week as a unive’rsity student and I made the exodus. From the East to the West, flying over our vast confederation, I arrived like a new Prince album, fresh and ready, to inhale the Western air. Hello mountains. Hello ocean. I am from Ontario. Southwestern Ontario to be precise. In Ontario, we are surrounded by cities and farms and more cities and more farms. Oh yeah, there are some lakes too, but you can’t swim in many of them. A few hours to the north is Muskoka, but you can’t enjoy silence thanks in part to Goldie Hawn and Kurt Russell fighting over their new jet ski equipped with e-mail. So, there I was in Vancouver, the haven for hip Canadian students. It is amazing that The Beachcombers didn’t taint its image. I took in the sites: Stanley Park, the Pacific Ocean, the Rocky Mountains, the aquarium where Jonah lurked during his days as the sexpot of DangerBay, I saw it all. My aunt even took me up to Whistler.

Wow, Whistler. Is it really true j:ou can roil their lift tickets into the perfect B~dcihd surprise? The 10 days went by quicki): and I have been back in normal Kitchener ior twu years. Putting these wild anecdotes asi de, Iet us ask the question: What is it that makes the 2O-scmethings of Ontario flock to WestThere I ern Canada, to Banff, Whistier, Victoria or even ‘%n City”? We all know people that have done it. So why go west? Why leave the province that is “Yours to discover” for beauty and opportunity? Is it really that great 1 Can anything top the perennial event for students everywhere, “Sand Job”? Simple. British Columbia is beautiful. When you can step out of a class at UBC and look one way and see the Rockies and look another and see the Pacific, you are in a perfect student setting.

Imprint, Friday, March IO, 2000

The ii~trflects vf university would rather walk in thl: forest than the city, chill out on a beach rather thar in a parking lot {which we tend to do at Waterloo since we have benches in one outside the PAC). I have not bettr~ to AI-.berta but 1 am sure it’s the \vas in same.Youcanonlygn to Toronto so many times.

Vancouver, the haven for hip Canadian students*

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of eating without utensils wears on you. From its shady New Democratic politics to its controversial pepper sprayAPEC conventions, B.C. seems to breathe out more life than the middle of the Canada sandwich. It goes beyond the geography and the mild weather to a special feeling of being in the “promised land” (which my Simon Fraser friend from Cambridge says many people out there call it). This idea of a promised land may be nothing more than a

mytji; more notable for this writer is the ide;i of escape. Going west to the mountains and blue oc’eiln is escaping everything that is Ontario. The 401, the Megacity of Toronto that never ends, the bitter cold winters and the humid, ~ur~cornfortabie and sticky summers. In Ontario thcrc is always something to complain about, but never in B.C. So what if it rains a lot? It’s much bt3ttt3r than snow storms that need to be fought with our Armed Forces. I’m not trying to downplay the pride I feel for being born and growing up in Ontario; but with all the exciting terrain outside of our province, why not make the flight? If Jack Kerouac’s Dean Moriarty and Sal Paradise were Canadian, I’m not sure if they would have kept driving back and forth between St. John’s and Victoria. They probably would have stayed in one place, and for some reason, with it being the place to “be,” I feel that place would be out west. With all this in my mind there is only one other question: Why not go east?

Co-oping in K=Wthis summer?It can’t be that bad JON

- HILLING

/mp7M

stafl

ou were finally offered a co-op job for the summer term. You rush to your advisor to find out where you will be spending the next four motlths of the year and to your horror, it’s Kitchener-Waterloo. Your perpetual attempts to get out of the Tri-city area have failed and you sleep every night in self-pity after thinking about the boring summer that lays ahead. There’s not much to do in the city in the winter, so why would summer be any different? Seek no more, K-W attractions will eventually surface. The fall and winter terms at UW can’t get

much more boring for students because there is simply not much to do. A typical night might include a guzzling session at a local watering hole or a drive out to the far ends of the city to catch a flick at SilverCity. Perhaps you have steered clear of all inner-city nightclubs because of the smoking bylaw. Don’t worry; local attractions become noticeable when the early months of summer approach. On the outskirts of the city lay two amusement parks: Bingemans and Sportsworld. Bingemans, located on Victoria Street North heading towards Guelph, features camping facilities, six waterslides, a wavepool and ground amusements such as mini-golf and go-karts. On the other side of Kitchener, Sportsworld, which -

is located just off of Old King Street heading into Preston, offers similar amusements, but also features a fabulous restaurant and bar, Moose Winooski’s, which also has one of the best patios in the region. Perhaps you prefer a day of shopping. As most students have discovered, Conestoga Mall is located on King Street, just 10 minutes from UW. If you are sick of the local mall, you can make the trek to Fairview Park Mall, located on Fairview Road in the east side of Kitchener. But, if you’re looking for a truly unique shopping experience, you can test your bargaining skills at the St. Jacobs Farmers’ Market, located at the end of King Street about 10 minutes up the road from Conestoga Mall. You

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can buy all kinds of useless crap like fake Rolex watches and used CDs, but you can also enjoy excellent fresh fruits and vegetables. Across the street from the market, you can shop at the St. Jacobs Factory Outlet, which houses Levi’s and Reebok outlet stores. Also, check out the Lego outlet which features amazing new Lego displays every month. Golf nuts will be happy to hear that K-W offers many challenging courses, including the two city-owned courses, Rockway and Doon Valley, Hop on a bus with your clubs and enjoy a few pints after your round; Rockway is located just on the outskirts of downtown Kitchener. Just remember to bring cash; prices at these courses are no different from others.

You mean it’s not real? D

oes Star Trek science have a basis in rea!ity, or is it justa lot of ‘“gee, whiz” nonsensical science fiction? Gene ICoddenber-rJ7 (the creator of Star%&) and his writers started with science as we know it atId used some creativity to fit it into a dramework of amazing invention5 that support astionfilled and entertaining stories, Roddenberrylikelyknewthatspaceships unable to go faster than light would take decades to reach the stars, and that would be too boring for a one-hour weekly show. So he put warp drives into the showpropulsion by distorting the space-time continuum that Einstein conceived. Along with all the other magic, this has uplifted our vision of what might be possible, which is one of the reasons why the series has been so popular. So what are the features of Star&k that a person interested in science can count on, and what features rightly tick off critics? The Ship’s Computer: Most of what it does is within the plausible realm of artificial intelligence. We have autopilot functions and navigational systems today, and these are the most used functions of the Entetgrise computer. In 400 more years -the time when Star Trek: The Next Generation is set - it is reasonable to expect many of the abilities of this computer to be achieved. Matter/Anti-matter Power Generation: The mixing of matter and anti-matter and the way it’s described is reasonably correct. The anti-matter (frozen anti-hydrogen) is handled with magnetic fields and never allowed to touch normal matter, or KA-BOOM! This much is real science. As for dilithium crystals, that’s just imaginary. Impulse Engines: These are rocket engines based on the fusion reaction-we don’t have the technology for them yet, but they are within the bounds of engineering.

Androids: At a recent conference on cybernetics, the president of the American Association for Artificial Intelligence was asked what was the ultimate goal of his field of technology. He replied, “Lieutenant Ccmmander Data.” Right now, however, it is very controversial in computer science whether it can be done. Sensors and Tricorders: These are revealing as plot devices, but with a stretch of the imagination the tricorder scan could have today’s magnetic resonance imager as its ancestor. Phasers: These are just fanciful props with no detailed physics explanation, descended from generations of blasters in science fiction of decades past. The original concept was that they were the next technological improvement upon lasers. Healing Rays: Star Trek’s Dr. Crusher routinely shines a healing ray on her wounded patients and the skin or bone heals immediately. There is some evidence that weak electric currents can accelerate healing of bones, so something similar to Dr. Crusher’s procedure -but nothing instantaneous -may be possible. Replicators: Today we can suspend single atoms or small numbers of atoms within a trap made of electromagnetic fields and experiment on them. That’s as close as the replicator is to reality. Making solid matter from a pattern, as the replicator appears to do, is far beyond present science. Transporter: We don’t have a clue about how to really build a device like the transporter.

Nothing in the physics of today gives a hint about how dematerializing and re-maferializing atoms might be possible. Holodeck: The same applies to this one. Holograms are apparent images with three d imensi onal structure. We can’t imagine a way to assemble matter in the same way as the light in a hologram. Universal LanguageTranslator: The waySturk& crew can encounter an alien spacecraft, “Hail them on standard frequencies,” and establish instant telecommunications on their view screens is a preposterous shortcut to keep rhe plot from faltering. We can certainly dismiss the possibility of such an invention ever being built. Warp Interstellar Drive: This is the crowning achievement of Federation technology! Despite its fundamental role in the show’s plot, it violates known physics to an extent that can’t be defended. B arring a very unlikely demolition of Einstein’s theory by future, revolutionary discoveries in quantum physics, warp drive can’t exist. The bottom line isthat Star Trek science is an entertaining combination of real science, and imaginary science gathered from lots of earlier stories and stuff the writers make up week by week to give each new episode novelty. The real science is an effort to be faithful to humanity’s greatest achievements, and the fanciful science is the playing field for a game that expands the mind as it entertains.

An actuarial science Iookat getting older JOHN SWAN hpffi7t staf

ooner or later, every person must face this inevitability with a brave face. Only after a long a.r,d courageous fight does one realize that their struggle has come to an end and one can just relax and enjoy oneself. This person has worked hard and now will receive a just reward, Thismandatory facet of life is neither death nor taxes, but retirement. And with retirement comes the question of economic rnequaliry and the change of economic status of the individual. Luckily, Steven Pros provided some interesting answers on questions about changes of income after retirement in actuarial science talk recently at UW. On March 7, 2000, Pros faced a small audience in MC 5 126 to discuss the changesof economic status and inequality over later life. Currently at McMaster’s Centre for Genealogical Studies, Pros has just compIeted his thesis on this topic. The talk proved to be quite interesting and very important, especialfy since baby boomers are nearing their retirement age. The research goals of Mr. Pros were threefold: to measure the equalizing effect of the

retirement income system relative to the labour market, the intra-cohort economic status maintenance given a set of assumptions, and finally, the changes in the level of economical inequality within the cohorts. For these groups, Pros set up two hypotheses. The first hypothesis stated that those retirees with early status advantages improve their relative economic position in old age. The second hypothesis stated that income inequality increases with age. The first hypothesis was tested using the General Social Survey from 1994, published by Statistics Canada. Cross-sectional data changes in economic inequality estimated from the 1922-l 926 cohort from 1973 to 3 996 tested the second hypothesis. From the discussion came many interesting facts and conclusions. The first hypothesis was disproved by breaking down the income of seniors (age 65 and over) using data from 1973 and 1996. Basically, when the regression coefficients were used, the data demonstrated that income differences between those in the groups of Core Industry, Occupation and Education were not all that significant.

As for the second hypothesis, that was also disproved by looking at three cohorts. Those three cohorts were people born 1917- 1921, 19224926 and 1927-1931. Pros also introduced the Gini co-efficient, which measured inequality between the top and bottom equintiles. The Gini co-efficient was highest when people are between 65 and 69 years of age, and then falls. Finally, Pros proved that there is a strong negative correlation between the Gini co-efficient and the percentage of a senior’s income that comes from government transfers. Sweden has a Gini co-efficient of -191 and 72 per cent of income from transfers. The United States, on the other hand, has a Gini co-efficient of ,372 and 43 per cent of income from government transfers. Canada did well with a Gini coefficient of .24 and 55 per cent of income from transfers. It will be interesting to see the future of this topic, especially if the government wants to privatize pension plans, clawback Old Age Security or the Canada/Quib& Pension Plan, or the increase of pension contributions by women and the revision of tax laws. Those who showed up were treated to a talk that wiI1 be at the head of actuarial science discussion for quite some time.

To infinity,

and beyond!

Qn Monday, Advanced Micro Devices (AMD) introduced its latest computer chip: the I GHz (or 1,000 MHz) Athlon processor. This marks the first time a computer chip that has broke the 1 GHz barrier has been available to the pubhc, and t&s further strengthened A&ID’s lock on the processor speed wars between itself and Intel. However, AMD’s gap was quickly cut short, as Intel annuunced the release of their 1 GI-Iz Pentium III processor this past Wednesday, once again tying the two for the

processor speed crown,

UW is the kmovator, US is the imitator Arizona Democrats made history on Tuesday as they were the first Americans able to use the Internet to cast ballots in a legally binding election. Registered Democrats logged onto a Web site, entered their identification numbers, and

then voted for their choice for the Democratic Presidential candidate. This pilot project comes ZI few weeks after UWs very own Feds tested a similar project, allowing Environment Studies and Independent Studies students ta vote online for the 2OOO~Ul Feds’ election.

Selling out The New Fmgkzndjtwmul of Medicine made a public apology last Wednesday for violating its own standards, Thcl journal, one of the tap ranked scientific pub&cations in the world and a leading critic of doctors’ financial ties to industry, apalogized for using articles whose authors had financial tics to various drug companies. Ahhough the journal was told by the authors themselves of their financial ties,it:still decided to publish 19 different articles over the past three years.

Chew on this According versity

to scientists

at the Cifu Uni-

School of Medicine in Japan,

elderly people who wish to retain their memory should chew. As people get older, the cells in the hippocampus area af the brtin (which is key for learning)

usually start to deteriorate, resulting in a decline of short-term memory. Using magnetic resonance imaging (MN), researchersdiscoveredthatchewinghelps stop this, as the j;tw movements increxd activity in the hippwampus area, thus preventing the deterioration of shortterm memory*

SCIENCE

Migraine BEYSY

DUNBAR Imprtnt

staff

t’s quite possible that the headache you have been suffering from for the past week is a result of stress, in which case your best bet is to slow down. Go for a walk or run, enjoy the fresh air, have sex, avoid the brewskies, eat better and grab a few extra 2s. Hit up a friend for a neck and shoulder massage, take a few acetaminophen tabs and soak in the tub. For the average tension headache sufferer, these recommendations should bring you some relief. If you are one of the unlucky few who suffer from migraines, a week long bout with these headaches could spell trouble. There is a new nasty migraine out there called the transformed migraine and it really sucks. Those of us already intimate with migraine pain need to remind ourselves that if they last longer than two days, we must go to the doctor. Or if they occur more than 15 times a month, we should make an appointment double-quick. Transformed migraines occur when the drug taken to alleviate the pain brings relief, but the migraines begin to occur more often. This results in more frequent doses of the painreliever. As a result, a vicious cycle begins. For example, the migraine medication is used more than three days a week and its withdrawal triggers a headache that can only be treated with the offending substance, This can happen with less serious substances than migraine medication as well. Caffeine, simple analgesics, even sedatives can cause a similar type of headache-withdrawaf-headache cycle. It is important that you go to your doctor upon recognition of your medical condition.

imprint, Friday, March

t 0, 2000

misery He or she will help you monitor your intake of substances that may bt contributing to your pain using a headache diary. They will also be able to provide alternate pain relief to break the cycle. In most cases, a transformed migraine won’t go away while the sufferer continues to overuse the pain reliever. There are some interesting new developments in the effort to relieve pain that is sometimes described as an ice pick going into your head. Botox is a highly purified form of botulism toxin type A. In a double-blind study, patients received multiple injections of either the drug or a placebo into muscles into their head. Half the patients who received the Botox reported a 50 per cent reduction in the number of migraines they suffered per month, The ones they did suffer were less severe. Frovatriptan has a shorter half-life (the amount of time it takes for half the drug to leave the body) than other triptan-related drugs. A drug with a short half-life can be taken less often without reduced benefit. 9 Rizatriptan benzoate is a drug aimed to relieve menstrual cycle-related migraines. This is good news, since approximately 70 per cent of migraine sufferers are women. In a study at the Jeffereson Headache Centre in Philadephia, two hours after taking a 10 mg does of the drug, 42 per cent of patients were pain-free when they had their periods and 37 per cent were pain-free when they did not have their periods. With any of the above mentioned drugs side effects are common and could be serious for individuals with pre-existing conditions. There are better options than living with the pain, and they start once you consult your doctor. l

Wednsday March 22, 2000 at 4:30 p.m. in the SLC Great Hall All fee-paying members of the Federation of Students are invited to attend and are eligible to vote. If you cannot attend, but would still like to participate, you may proxy your vote.

:.. ,:... : LA.

.’ RENkE

imprint

MERCURI staff

on-Newtonian fluids-better known to some of us kids as slime - are so called because they do not fit into Sir Isaac Newton’s laws of how true liquids behave. They have a high viscosity, meaning that they have a resistance to flow. Some nonNewtonian fluids include quicksand, glue and ketchup. If something acts on them with a small amount of force (if you stir them slowly, or let your fingers slowly sink into them) they won’t offer as much resistance as they would if a greater force acted on them. Create a sturdy enough ooze,and it should resist a punch about as well as a brick wall. There are many variations on the slime recipe; today, we offer two. Watch out with these slimes, because they can be messy. Ingredients should not be eaten, even if they are labeled non-toxic. This week’s

water {preferably a Zip-hck bag

foodcdourirzg(optiorlal)

Instructions: 1. Pour theglue into the jar. Fill the empty glue bottle with water, and add to the jar. Stir. You can add food colouring here if you want to be festive - a few drops will do. 2. Pour one cup of distilled water into the pop bottle and add 1 teaspoon (5ml) of Borax powder. Cap the bottle and shake to mix well. 3. Slowly add the glue mixture to the pop bottle. Begin shaking the bottle, making sure to wrap your hands tightly around the bottle. The heat from your hands is essential in helping the chemical reaction take place. It will be wet, stringy and messy at first, but the more you shake it the better it mixes and the less sticky and firmer it becomes. 4. Once it gets firmer you can either pour it out or cut open the bottle. Use your hands to stick all the unstuck clumps together. Store your slime in a Zip-lock bag in the fridge. That’s it!

fun: Two-ingredient

Simple Elmer’s

distilled)

slick

slime

Using two parts cornstarch and mixing it with one part water in a bowl with your hands, you will eventualiy get a very strange consistency. Keep some more water handy, dropping in a little at a time to adjust for too much dryness or wetness. Food colouring is optional; add to the cornstarch when it is dry.

slime

You wiil need: a mzspoon . u big jar with cz lid 2 L pop bottle measuring cup Boruxpowder 120 ml bottle of Elmer’s schoolglue!)

magic mud

soi&

l l

white glue (not

For many more slime and play dough recipes check out Bizarre Stuff you can Make in Your Kitchen: http://freeweb.pdq.net/headstrong,’

What do the following companies have in

Answer:

The CUTC Technology Exposition FREE Admission

FEDERATION OF STUDENTS University 0f Waterloo

Today Fed Hall 10:3Oam - 4:OOpm C UTC

Warriors set the Lancer track on fire Amazing performances lead to 18 CIAU qualifiers

ALISON

BRAZIER

ALLISON

SALTER special to imprint

n March 3 and 4, the strongest LJW Track and Field team in recent years travelled to the OUA Championships, 0 which was hosted by the University of Windsor. Headcoach Brent McFarIane prepared aunique plan two weeks earlier to face the gruelling two days of competition. A few meets back, the University of Western Ontario Open and the Eastern Michigan Invitational prepared the team for the stresses of the two day schedule used at the OUA and CIAUchampionships. The team learned agreat deal from this experience and, as a result, came up with tremendous individual and team performances at the OUAchampionships with 36 personal bests, bringing the team total to 205 personal bests to date. On the women’s side, five gold medals, two silver medals and two bronze medals were won. Dana “Sparkles” Ellis set a varsity record and tied the OUA record in the pole vault, narrowly missing the meet record height. Dana is now ranked first in Canada heading into this weekend. Daniella “Speedster” Carrington wowed the crowd with a personal best and a gold medal in the 6Om. Teammates Heather “P.E.I.” Moyse and Angie “Pig tails” Ross followed Daneilla’s lead with a silver medal and a fifth place finish respectively. Moyse did not stop as she continued on to a personal best and a gold medal in the 3OOm, ranking her second in Canada. The women did not stop there. Deborah “Where did she come from?” Buhlers took the 3,OOOm by storm, lapping the entire field and barely missing the varsity record by one second to win a gold medal. Deborah is currently ranked first in Canada with her closest competition 15 seconds away. Alison “She’s so great”

Brazier silenced her critics with a leap of 5.5 Im to clinch the silver medal in the women’s long jump. Allison “She’s so fast” Salter gave a valiant effort in the 6OOm and although being boxed in by various runners placed fourth overall. Kristie “Cross-country” Henry finished fourth in the 1,500m. Individually on the men’s side, Neal “Strong but silent” Roberts had a personal best and a fifth place finish in the Born. Paul “Long legs” Gill finished fourth in the 3UOm and is ranked seventh in CIAU. Stephen ‘Xross-country All-Canadian” Drew carried his outdoor success to the track with a strong sixth place finish in the 3,000m. Personal bests were also achieved by Chris “Dancing king” Kow in the 60&n, Gina “Rookie” Jackson in the l,OOOm, Adrian “Catch me if you can” Blair in the 300m, Angela “Pentathlete ?” Player in the high jump and Loes “Our only thrower” deWitt in the shot put. The war on the track began and ended with the Warriors relay teams. The men’s and women’s 4x20Om teams captured gold and left their competition in the dust. Daniella Carrington, Heather Moyse, Angie Ross and Alison Brazier smoked the competition, beating rivals U of T by over 30m. The team is ranked fourth in CIAU. Neal Roberts, Paul Gill, Adrian Blair and Jason “I’m so scared” Dockendorf had a seasonal personal best, beating out favouredyork and Windsor to grab the gold. Double bronze was also had for the men’s and women’s 4x400 relay teams. The men’s team of, Jimmy “Computer” Corupe, Adrian Blair, Pierre “Hello, Bonjour?” Labreque and Paul Gill ran an impressive race. The women’s team of Daniella Carrington, Allison Salter, Angie Ross and Heather Moyse ran out of the slow heat to win the bronze medal, just missing the silver. Bronzewasalsowoninthewomen’s4x800 a

These four women will be returning to Montrial to compete for all the marbles. team of Allison Salter, S hauna “Tough as nails” Ellis, Jill “Powerhouse” Patterson and Gina Jackson with an impressive personal best of over 20 seconds. The men’s 4x800 of Will “Rookie” Gibbons, Rob “Cab it” Bruce, Stephen Drew and Pierre Labreque finished sixth with a personal best. The team qualified 18 athletes for CIAU’s -the largest number in our history. Overall, the women’s team placed third, half a point behind U of T. This is impressive, considering the small size of our women’s team who beat out powerhouse track programs at rival universities with full facilities. The men’s team also showed results not seen in years at UW with a strong sixth place finish. Coach Brent McFarlane was very proud to see the team’s strength of character come through repeatedly.

1 A

Much thanks needs to be directed towards our coaches Brent McFarlane (Head coach}, Terry Goodenough (middle distance), Tim Moller (jumps), Tim Mussar (throws), Jill Bennett (hurdles) and Pat Steele (sprints). They have done a remarkable job. Despite limited track and field facilities, no track and much creativity on the part of our staff, our teams have successfully and repeatedly placed ahead of universities with full track and field facilities and full-time staff. We have the greatest student therapists in the world. Surinder Budwal and Katie Ballweg kept our team together both in the preventative and active therapy mode of injury cares. We would also like to thank the Athletic Department who helped to pave our road to success at the OUAs and the upcoming CwIJs in Montrial next week,

‘Warriors skip to LJUA cnamps Women defeat Lancersto win &own, while men can only b&t Badgers MARK

A. /mprint

whole ship.

SCHAAN sfaff

he Warrior women’s curling team stunned the Ontario UniversityAthletits crowd by soundly defeating the of the pack to win the OUA Champion-

The team came into the tournament in sixth place, having only won one match, yet stole first place, playing with prowess and controlling both offensive and defensive play. Women’s skip Tara McAninch led Kristy Yamasaki, Jami Burkelly, Erin Shaw and fifth Tara Middlemiss to victory, providing great competition for the rest of the pack. The women began their exciting tournament with a win against

hometown

riva1 Laurier.

Haying

with

73 per cent accuracy, the team posted a solid performance, defeating them 8-S. Following the confidence-boosting win, the team took on Western, solidly dominating play in the first half. The game grew close in the latter ends, but the Warriors’ excellent ability

led them to a 5-3 victory. The game was the peak of the Warriors’ play, highlighting their ability to make shots to score while aggressively ensuring that Western couldn’t make their own shots. The Waterloo team took the two wins in stride, concentrating on their game against Windsor, also undefeated in the tournament. Unfortunately, the game did not go to the Warriors as both teams struggled to make shots and Waterloo especially seemed unable to capitalize on scoring opportunities, losing 8-7. Fate seemed to intervene on Sunday as Waterloo defeated Toronto 8-6 then Brock 9-6, while Windsor (undefeated as of yet) lost to Western. This led to a tie for first place between the two teams. Waterloo’s play here was decisive, but still allowed tow many opportunities for the opposition to score. The final between Waterloo and Windsor was tight and was 4-2 in Waterloo’s favour after five ends. However, Windsor caught up scoring two in the sixth end and one in the seventh. Waterloo capitalized on Windor’s

mistakes, taking three in the eighth and two in the ninth to ensure a10-6 victory, crowning Waterloo the 2000 OUA curling champions. The men found play at the tournament difficult, contributing to their fifth place finish overall. Starting off well by narrowly defeating Brock 6-5, the men played controllably and with a decisive plan of attack. Skipped by Chris Schell, the team utilized the talents of Steve Hertz, Dale Dalzel1, Ryan Kennedy and alternates Jamie Stull and Jeff Dungen against very stiff competition. A tough match against Windsor (7-5) deflated the Warriors and led them to a poor 8-6 match against Toronto. The team seemed to miss golden opportunities with the hammer to score points, allowing U of T to take the match. Sunday proveddecisive for the men with a tough ioss to Laurier and LO Queen-s. The Laurier game saw the Warriors unable to control ends while the toughly-contested game against Queen’s saw the Warriors simply run out of rocks. The men’s season, despite its unsuccessful finale, seemed ro leave little hard feelings for

the players. Facing stiff competition, the men played to an overall 72 per cent with some games as high as 82 per cent. Overall, a grand season for the curlers. UW has much to celebrate with skilled talent and an OUAwin by the . women. Congratulations go to both teams, especially to all graduating players. We look forward to another year of solid stones and draws next: season!

SPORTS

Imprint, Friday, March

IO, 2000

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Survival

of the results

Fittest

n March 3 and4,122 badminton players participated in an event that was a true test of fitnessWomen ‘s Singles: the Badminton Club’s famous “SurChampion: Cindi Tsai Runner Up: Mei Dent vival of the Fittest” Tournament. Men 3 Singles: Run in the seemingly never-endChampion: Bob Lee ing double-elimination format, (with Runner Up: Stephen Docking the exception of Men’s Singles, be-. Women 3Doubles: cause a whopping 41 participants Champions: Mei Dent /Ann Cheng signed up) the full draw, 16-hour Runners Up: Marsha Boyagooda I tournament that spanned two days and included a total of 220 matches . Ginny Tough Men ‘s Dou b1es: lived up to itsname. Generously sponsored by Black Knight, Courts Plus, Champions: Bob Lee / David Kue Powerade and Campus Recreation, Runners Up: Sam Chao/ Eddy Kung the tournament gave away over 50 Mixed Doubles: prizes, 16 beautiful trophies and proChampions: Eddy Kung/ Daisy Ghan vided lots of food and drinks for the Runners Up: Dennis The/ Mei Dent players. In the end, I.5 pizzas, 3 cases Congratulations to all division of bananas, 150 wings and over 70 wmners. litres of Powerade and iced tea were While the winners had trophies consumed by the hungry, thirsty athto take home, over 40 other players letes. The famous event, with a traditook home a variety of draw prizes, tion of creating a friendly atmosprovided by Black Knight and Courts phere while maintaining a high level Plus. These included feather shuttleof competition, attracted players cocks, grip tapes, strings, gift certificates from Sport Chek, T-shirts, and from many other universities from

wo years ago, a Canadian woman made sporting history. At the Winter Olympic Games in Nagano, the official home to hotel-trashing American hockey players and joint-smoking snow boarders, a Saskatchewan rink was smoking the competition in women’s curling. This side from Saskatchewan was led by Sandra Schmirler, who was by that time already a household name at this uniquely Canadian sport. Unfortunately, Schmirler could not win the most important battle of her life. That battle, which ended on March 2 early in the morning, was against the scourge of the Western World, cancer.

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Schmirler was born Sandra Peterson on June 11,1963 in Biggar, Saskatchewan. From an early age, Schmirler enjoyed the game of curling.

today!

all over Ontario, including players from as far away as Ottawa. The results of the tournament are as follows:

Her

first

major

accomplishment

in curling came in 1987, when she was the third to skip Kathy Fahlman. Six years later, Schmirler became the skip of the Regina team and started her ascent to the top of u-omen’s curling. With third Jan Betker, sec-

ond Joan McCusker and lead Marcia Gudereit, Schmirler skipped the team towardsvictory at the Scott Tournament of Hearts. After winning the Canadian title, Schmirler followed this up with a world title. In 1994, this foursome did it again. This time, she represented not team Saskatchewan, but Team Canada. Schmirler’s rink was the last time a team representing Canada won the Scott Tournament of Hearts. The best year Schmirler, Cudereit, McCusker and Betker would have was in 1997. Defeating the defending champions from Ontario (skipped by Marilyn Bodogh), Schmirler went on to win her third Scott Tournament of Hearts, a feat that was unprecedented. Furthermore, the foursome from Regina also won the World Curling championship. After winning her third national title and world title, Schmirler got the right to play in the Olympic games in Nagano. Whencurling became an official medal sport, Schmirler did not waste any time in inspiring her teammates to grab the gold. With the entire world watching, Schmirler did just that, defeating the team from Denmark 7-5 in the final to win the first Olympic gold in curling. With this gold medal, the Canadian Press named Schmirler’s team as the team of the year and she was inducted

into

the Canadian Curling Hall of Fame. The next year, though, she would lose in a battle with Alberta’s Cathy Borst. As for her social life, she was quite active indeed. When she wasn’t

the most drooled-over prizes of alL-four beautiful Black Knight racquet bags. In the end, everyone went home with a full stomach, more than a few muscle aches and great memories of a relaxed, friendly badminton tournament.

Ice

hockey report

mid-season

In the competitive ice hockey league, three ‘A’ league teams remain undefeated: the AHS Wizards, Charlestown Chiefs and Paisley Packers have shown some excellent twoway play on the way to their perfect records. Further, the Paisley Packers have done this while retaining a perfect Spirit of Competition rating. In the ‘B’ division, two teams, the Goon Squad and the Worriers, have yet to drop a contest. Srotagivan and the Beavers have managed to stave off defeat in the ‘C’ division, while keeping their Spirit of Competition ratings high. Congratulations to all teams so far on some fine teamwork and stick savvy and good luck in the upcoming playoffs. It should be a blast.

leading Saskatchewan to national and international titles, she was working in Regina as a supervisor for a leisure centre. In 1993, she met Shannon England and found happiness outside the rink. To her, he was the inspiration of three national titles and four international victories. After the Nagano victory, Sandra settled down with Shannon and gave birth to two daughters, Sara (age two) and Jenna (age eight months) in Regina. Luckily, she still found time to hone her curling skills, sign autographs for up-and-coming curlers and greet her many legions of fans. Sadly, this legend of women’s curling has now left us at the prime of her life. Her legacy, however, will not be forgotten.

She is survived

not

only by her husband and two daughters, but also the emire legion of curling fans and, of c~)cirSt’, Cmadian sport. So, let us honour her by raising our steins high anal drink tc‘) one of CanadLl’s greatest athletes.

imprint,

Friday, March

IO. 2000

SPORTS

Mardi Gras fun for Warriors REUBKN

hereâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s more to Mardi Gras than drinking and costumes. Some of the members of the Waterloo menâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s rugby team travelled down to New Orleans during reading week for the first invitational Mardi Gras Rugby Tournament hosted by the New Orleans Rugby Club. The team that went down was comprised of team members from Laurier, Western and Water100 County teams. They all banded tugether to form a formidable team dubbed the Waterloo Warriors. The first test for these great Warriors proved an easy feat and they won their first game against the University of Florida, 44-O. The next game against the University of Wisconsin was won as well with a score of 27-3. This win qualified the team for

Leaders of the week

Shad

Maguire

Sharal has done an outstanding job this term coordinating the competitive broomball league. Her organizational abilities have allowed the term to run smoothly and everything is in order as the playoffs approach. Sharal is always on top of things and her friendly attitude makes

Theseguys partied at Mardi Gras (oh yeah, and they played rugby too!) the championship game. After a night on the town celebrating their success, the Warriors played Loyola, a team from a Universky based in Chicago. After a tough match, the Warriors prevailed with a

score of 17-12. This win also meant that the Warriors won the tournament undefeated. Congratulations to Mike Naler, the strum half for the Warriors who was named tournament MVP.

SPORTS

Imprint,

Friday, March

IO, 2000

Waterloo corralled Athletes of the week

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t’s sad to see it go, but the Warrior basketball season is over for another year. The women’s basketball team played its last game on Thursday, March 2 against the Western Mustangs. The Warriors lost, 67-34. The playoff game was part of the “final four” - a trip to the

For the purpose of reporting on the previous year and election of the Board of Directors. The audit, a financial update, staff, board and volunteer reports will be presented.

(Only paid members can vote).

will be sehed

- only

$2!

Student Life Centre Multi-Purpose Room 5pm Tuesday, 21 March 2000

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fourth-year physics student by the name of Ian Murray has been cross-country skiing ever since he can remember. Back home, in Nova Scotia, his parents would drag him out to the trails and slopes (he did downhill skiing as well, until he was 13) once a week. He didn’t really begin to enjoy it until he was 11. “It took more than a little bit of encouragement to make me do it,” he says, “But I’m glad I did.” The highlight of Murray’s long nordic career so far was his eighth place finish in the 1Ok.m skate race at the Canada Games last year. This year, he finished third in the 1Okm skate at Duntroon, with the University of Waterloo team. He was also fifth in the 15km classic race. The skate race allows the skier to use whatever technique he or she wants, with the most effective being an ice skating like motiod, with no wax on the skis. The classic style prohibits pushing off to the side, so you need more wax on your ski. Murray chose Waterloo because it had the best combination of science and nordic skiing Ontario is the only province with a university racing circuit, so he knew he was coming west for university.

Waterloo, he said, has the most organized practices, seven or eight a week and has a better team environment than other schools. Waterloo coach Don Mackinnon was another reason Murray chose to come here. “Don is a super keen guy and good coach as well,” he says. This year, the University of Waterloo hosted the OUA championships in Haliburton. The two-day meet consisted of a classic race and relay on the first day, and a pursuit skate on the second day. Murray hoped to do particularly well. “The opportunity to come first is definitely there,” he says. “There is a group of five or six who could win.” He notes that “skis, mind and body” must all be together come the final, in order for him, and for Waterloo, to take a shot at winning. “Slow skis can put you out of the race,” he warns. Murray also hopes to race in the first ever Canadian University championships, to be held in Thunder Bay from March 14 to March 19. It is not a CIAU event, but rather a meet organized in part by Mackinnon, which will include community colleges from Alberta and CEGEPs from Qu6bCc. Whoever is there, Murray’s experience of a lifetime of skiing will put him at or near the top of the heap.

”

Heather Moyse Warrior Track & Field A fourth-year Kinesiology student from Summerside, P.E.I., Heather won a gold medal in the 300m with personal best time of 39.53s. Heather also helped the 4x2OOm relay team to a gold medal with a season’s best time. Heather was part of the 4x400m relay team that finished third collecting the bronze medal and qualifying for the CIAU Championships this weekend, March 10-12, at McGill University. Heather accounted for 18 individual points and 16 points with the relay teams, helping the Warriors to a bronze medal this past weekend at the OUA Championships held in Windsor.

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A second-year Science student from Brampton, Paul finished fourth place in the 3OOm and was part of the 4x200m gold medal relay team running a season’s best time this past weekend at the OUA Championships held in Windsor. Paul was also the anchor for the Bronze medal winning 4x40Om relay team. Paul accounted for five individual points for the team and was part of the 16 points the relay team accumulated, contributing to a seventh place overall team finish. Paul is off to the CIAU Championships this weekend, March lo-12 at McGill University.

Ian Murray: Cross-country athlete extraor.dinaire

Annual General Meeting

Dinner

playoffs that the women Warriors haven’t made in the past four years. Falling behind at the half by 12 points, the women were unable to catch up to the Mustangs. Shooting only 20.7 per cent from the floor, Waterloo was unable to capitalize. Leslie Mitchell and Meg Clancy scored six points each. Cpngratulations to the Warriors basketball teams for a great season.

Paul Gill Track & Field

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Chemical En@neering, She capped off a stellar season playing guard for the Warriors and was named to the West’s OUA Ail-Star list.

Moist getswarm UW welcome Fullhouseturn out to dance,drink and drool over David Usher

or those of you who didn’t already hear, the Canadian band Moist was here over the weekend and put on an excellent show. The Matt Osborne Band, from the Waterloo area, opened for the B.C. natives and gave the audience a good preview of the talent and energy that would continue throughout the evening. Although the Matt Osborne Band played a short set of only 30 minutes, they did well, the powerful voice of Osborne complemented by extensive guitar work. Although Osborne did mention that he was a little nervous, his apprehension did not come through in the music. Only once did he remark on the size of the crowd, likening it to “being born and having all your in-laws around you, staring. n He only introduced a few of the band’s songs, such as “20 feet,” a song featuring heavy guitar riffs that was apparently dedicated to Osborne’s former employer, Blockbuster Video. Unfortunately, Osborne and his crew seemed to catch the crowd early, pre-energy and probably pre-alcohol, so they were not rewarded with an enthusiastic crowd; the audience did mill around in front of the stage, but didn’t do much else. The last song from the band was probably the most interesting. Entitled “Grapple Gromitz,” it was about “loss and devotion and Bell Canada” - an interesting trio. Apparently, 26,000 of these grapple gromitz things were sold every day (even though no one really has any idea what they were) and the Matt Osborne Band decided to write a song about them, one that started

slower and worked into a faster beat, replete with Osborne’s head banging. They finished their set to the applause of the crowd, which was apparently saving its energy for the main attraction. Moist arrived at lo:30 p.m. to an excited crowd that was eager to receive them. They started off with “Tangerine” to get the audience going, which wasn’t difficult since the slightest cue from David Usher seemed to whip the crowd into a screaming frenzy. Right from the beginning, Moist’s performance was high energy and they somehow kept it through the entire show, even though they played for nearly 80 minutes (what stamina!). The two guitarists, Mark Makoway and Jeff Pearce, proved their worth with extensive guitar work and interaction with the band and the crowd. After a few songs, Usher tried to talk to the crowd over their applause and cheering, then gave up and went into “Silver,” which encouraged much participation from the audience, participation that was eagerly and enthusiastically supplied. Moist then started a single from their latest album,Mercs~esFivsand Dime, entitled “Dogs.” Usher started having a little more fun with this one, waving to the crowd and smiling through the lyrics that contributed to the album’s title. Usher was moving around the most, obviously because he didn’t have any extensive machinery aFtached to him, but he often tried to integrate other members of the band. He sometimeseven stepped back to give the spotlight to one of theguitarists, often Makoway. Every once in a while, Usher would approach the crowd, teasing them with his presence, then jumping back to start another song. After a while,

KevinYoung, the keyboardist, started to play to the crowd as well, although he didn’t interact quite as much as Usher, Makoway, and Pearce. At one point, Pearce mentioned that his first crowd surfing experience happened a few years ago at - Fed, although he didn’t repeat that feat this night. He did take over the spotlight during “Fish,” though, getting over his “shyness” as Usher put it. Pearce then climbed to the side of the stage, looking as if he might attempt some crowdsurfing but backed down to play “Leave it alone,” which did get members of the crowd surfing around. The audience seemed more than willing to support the odd fan, sometimes even providing a type of hand-seat that would have been comfortable and supplied an exceilent view. Finally, for “Aphelia,” drummer Paul Wilcox took the spotlight as a small-scale light show highlighted his furious drumming with an impressive solo. Usher joined in the energy by sharing the contents of his rather large water bottle with the crowd, which didn’t seem to mind at all. In fact, he seemed to excite some of the female fans with the thought that some of Usher’s spit might have actually landed on them. Once again, Usher shared his spotlight with the other band members, interacting with each of them in turn, and making sure the show wasn’t concentrated solely on him. This tactic didn’t work for some of the female fans since, as a few of my single friends pointed out, he seemed to be wearing a gold band on the ring finger of his left hand. Sorry girls. Moist seemed to calm the crowd surfers with “Comes and Goes”until Usher got up on the side of the stage, looking like he was contemplating

joining the crowd, but instead just got them jumping around in frenzied excitement. The crowd was tamed once again during “Hate,” which seemed to send some couples into lip-lockmode on the sidelines. A few surfers tried out the crowd again during “Breathe” but didn’t get very fir. At this point, members of the crowd tried to entice the band with their own things. One person threw a hat on stage, which Usher picked up and placed on Pearce’s head. This didn’t seem to impress the guitarist much. They soon regained the audience’s energy with “Resurrection,” introducing the song with an explosion of lights. After this, the band took leave of the stage, much to the chagrin of the audience, and took

their time coming back, apparently because they had to take a pee break. They were welcomed back to the stage with the crowd chanting “Moist! Moist! Moist! ” They began their post-potty break encore with my personal favourite from the third album, “Underground.” One of the best features of the show was the fact that, unlike some performers who like to fiddle with their best songs when played live, Moist played everything just as it sounded on the albums, making the songs immediately recognizable to all fans. The crowd surfers came back with the encore, with one surfer getting high enough to come eye to eye continued

to page 22

Closeto 9OOfanschantin~“Moist! Moist! Moist!“can bevewamusing.

UW unearths student art work RYAN PRICE imprint

their education at Waterloo, graduating from Fine Arts. To show off their accomplishments, the two are

staff

March

6 and runs until March 11. The artists bring two very different styles to the show. When asked

elanie Wright and Mitiku Asmamaw stood amongst a group of friends, supporters and strangers in a dimly lit room which strongly contrasted the bright sunshine beaming through the windows out in the hall. I stood inside the door frame trying to adjust to the lighting while associating myself with the small room in which the event was hosted. As people came and went, there was consistently a group

of about

20 people

inside

the

room. Melanie and Mitiku both worked through the crowd, taking praise and criticism of their work. Melanie Wright and Mitiku Asmamaw are both about to finish

currently displaying their art in the Front Gallery inside East Campus Hall. Their show, Une&&, opened

what prompted them to show their works together, Wright said that it wasAsmamawwhocameupwith the

idea. He approached Wright at the start of last term, feeling that they both had works with similar aesthetits. As time progressed, so did their work. Their art became very different, but they both feel that it still seems to work. Wright explained that their two distinctly different subject matters work together by creating the idea of the circle of life. Wright explains that her work is “about food and art,” She focuses on the natural forms and organic colours of fruits and vegetables. She also states the important symbolism of

Wright’s medium of choice. She explains that she can create rich textureswith the oils, and they are avery classical medium for painting. This seems appropriate considering the amount of time her subject matter has existed on the earth. The depictions of the vegetables come from photographs taken at local markets and grocery stores. Her work ranges from the realist depiction in Onions to the abstract and somewhat surreal FfyingPota#oes. Wright shows a strong ability to work with her medium and shows

her subject

that she knows

matter,

stating

that they

are both “detoxifying and cancerpreventing.” Wright’s works are all titled appropriately after the food of choice depicted on the canvas. Oil paints are

how

to use colour

maximize the visual power of her art, The main study in Wright’s art appears to be potatoes, given that continued

to page

ARTS

Imprint, Friday, March

IO, 2000

Moist plays loud continued

from

page

The band then started a song that wasn’t familiar, but that one of

with Usher and almost be able to touch him. At this point, a brave female made it into the surfing arena while Moist played “Shotgun,” from their second album, Creature. After a while, Usher became concerned about the fans in the front of the crowdwhowerepressingeachother up against the barriers and most likely incurring a few bruises in the process. He told the crowd to “take care of each other in front, be good to each other .” At this point, my friends and I were trying to decide which songs were left, and we came to the conclusion that CrPush” should be coming up soon (every one else came to that conclusion, anyway. For some reason, I was under the impression that they had played it near the beginning - oh well). Of course, they played the song that introduced them to the music industry, with Usher once again sharing his water with the crowd.

my roommates soon identified as AC/DC’s “Back in Black.” Usher sacrificed his arm to the crowd so that members in the front row could sing into the microphone while waving their thumb and pinky finger in the air. At this point, Moist left the stage again, with the crowd chanting for them to come back, which they did, to play “Alive.” After this final song, Moist made it clear that the show was over, with Usher telling the crowd, “thanks for comingyou’re incredible.” Die-hard fans chanted their name as the band left the stage. Overall, the Matt Osborne Band and Moist put forth an excellent show, keeping most of the crowd until the very last song and entertaining them the whole time, Although Moist didn’t grant Imprint an interview, they did participate with the crowd and seemed to enjoy their evening at Fed Hall.

Making music the wrong way d

ANDREW special

O'CONNOR to imprint

‘ve been racking my brains all day to come up with an intro to this piece about Jim O’Rourke, and I’ve gotten nowhere. Where do you start to talk about a man who has made such a significant contribution to the world of music both as a producer and as a musician, but is only in his

early 3 OS? Well I guess I could start by talking about his education. He attended DePaul University where he attained a degree in composition. It was during these years that he developed his hatred for school and how it interfered with the creative process. He was in constant disagreement with his professors, who kept telling him “No. No you can’t do that, that’s not musical, that’s breaking the rules,” To this day Jim is still very outspoken about school, and is a strong endorser of dropping out: like he once said in interview, uNever let your schooling get in the way of your education.” He was involved with a whole slew of bands in the late 80s and early 90s in and around Chicago, few of which received any recognition, but

From the director of

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he later gained a great deal of exposure as a part of Gastr Del Sol, a quirky experimental rock outfit. However, long before he had earned the respect and admiration of indie rock kids everywhere, he was a highly regarded composer and improviser, playing with people like Gunter Muller, John Oswald, and Henry Kaiser. He released two of his earliest solo albums on the Australian experimental label, Extreme records. The first (and now out of print) was called Tamper, and it contains three beautiful electro-acoustic compositions. The second Extreme release was entitledRemoue?%e~ee~, an album of improvisations for prepared guitar. Both releases are iricredibly dark and challenging, and easily passed off as a bunch of noise, but behind all of that noise is the work of a genius, who, like most, is widely unappreciated in his own time. So what’s left for Jim O’Rourke to do? Well, why not a pop album? That’s right - once again Jim stays ahead of the game and the critics by doing what no one expects releasing a series of easy-listening pop albums. However, they are more than just

bubble gum pop albums. They are a challenge to the whole idea of music today; they are a juxtapo+ition, an attempt at doing things the wrong way, and as legendary composer Sun Ra said, “Music has been played for so many years the right way, why not try it the wrong way.” Jim does this in very subtle ways. On the surface his latest solo albums soundlike really well composed, well produced rock ‘n roll, but a closer look reveals it’s all a farce. TQ see this, one need not look any farther than the title track on his most recent release Halfway To A Threeway. It’s a touching love song sung in the first person about a guy who can’t get laid and whose standards keep getting lower and lower; by the end of the song he’s seducing a woman in a coma. Now this is all done completely straight and sincere. Another example would be getting Ken Vandermark (a notoriously loud and chaotic saxophone player) to play a soft and easy listening solo in the middle of a song. It’s all about doing what is not expected of you; whether it be music critics, professors, parents or society, Jim is telling us to ignore them all and never compromise on their behalf.

Imprint,Friday, March

ARTS

IO, 2000

Veggiesand death continued

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All of Asmamaw’s works are untitled but still manage to send a strong message. The works are all created on different slabs of wood which create a texture to rival those created by Wright’s oil paints. Mitiku uses bold contrasts in many of his works. His acryIic paintings are very abstract, but nianage to portray a very powerful message. After reading his artist’s statement at the front door, I can see the dead bodies rising off of the surface of his work. One of the untitled works gives the sense of the mountain regions of Africa and when more closely scruti-

Brown

Ple:themoauthors HowtofendaffdrunkenMathiesattheBomber. wanted to provide It was news to me that when a handbook that people could carry jumping into a dumpster, you should with them at all times for those try to land on your back, as the huunforseen situations that are someman body tends to bend in a V when times inescapable. Besides quick wits landing from asignificant height. This and common sense, this book might could result in a broken back if you be the only thing to save your life. land on your stomach. Despite pleading from friends Last week I learned how to spin and colleagues on campus, I had to my car in a 180 degree turn, both go out and try some of these handy forwards, and backwards. Making solutions first-hand. After spending that slim jim was easy considering the the better part of a week trying to step-by-step instructions. find killer bees and quicksand, I gave . On the down side, my doctor up and visited the Metro Toronto says the burn marks on my hands Zoo. You really have no idea how from trying to hot-wire my car may hard it can be toget inside the mountake a while to heal. If only I’d been tain lion cage, or the alligator padsmart and bought this book sooner, dock, for that matter. I might have been famous, or at least The section on breaking down a saved a bit on my CAA membership. door was a blessing in disguise, but I should have followed their advice and used my own door, instead of my neighbour’s. The book was probably meant more as a novelty than as a serious piece of survival gear, but the fact remairis that it is accurate and wellresearched, and a joy to read. Most people probably don’t know that you shouldn’t dive into water if chased

ou’re cruising at 20,000 feet on your way to some scorching tropical island in search of cool drinks and hot locals. As you slowly close your eyes, the plane leans sharply and begins to plummet towards the ocean. Looking out the windows, you see the planet becoming larger in your view and begin to panic. Once you break down the cockpit door, your worst fears are realized; the captain and crew are dead. There’s no way out; no parachutes and no radio. What should you do now? Well, if you were smart, you’d pull out your copy of The Mmst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook and turn directly to page 114: “How to land a plane.” The pocket-sized handbook presents loads of vital information for your average action hero or caped crusader. Contained within are nearly 200 pages of well-researched solutions to other frequently occurring problems like “How do I wrestle free from an alli-

page 21

roughly half of her works include the bland vegetable. Wright uses the potato to symbolize birth and growth. This helps create a link with Asmamaw’s work which focuses mainly on the deaths suffered in his homeland, Ethiopia. Together the two themes create the sense of a circle of life, portraying both life and death. Asmamaw focuses primarily on his childhood memories of the African landscape. He uses rocks to represent human bodies after death. “After death is where we lose all our

by killer bees - they’ll likely wait for you to surface -or that the bestway to take a punch to the head is to move into - not away - from it.

Brenda

from

fyok

TOMORROW

PAUL’S OF

WATER&@

ARTS

Imprint,

Friday, March

IO, 2000

Girls beat bow with the magic flute J

Laurier Faculty of Music wit~tiutier uniuersiiy March MARK

A. /mprint

4,200O SCHMN staf

he house was packed and the atmosphere was light as Wilfrid Laurier’s Faculty of Music presented Mozart’s Die Zuubeqhte on March 4,s and 6. The performance highlighted the significant vocal ability of the Laurier deparment, however, it missed perfection with struggling vocal capabilities and poor administrative detaiiing. Mozart’sZuube$ote is perhaps one of the most significant operas in classical music and definitely one that has earned Mozart permanent stature in the realm of musical wizardry. Despite its significance, the program contained no notes detailing the history of the piece, the plot of the text of even a simple list of arias. In fact, the program neglected even to mention the name of the performance’s director! The poor decision not to enhance the audience’s experience ,tith background on the work left the

listener unsatisfied and provided an incomplete opera spectacle. Despite the lack of technical formations, the listener certainly grasped the feeling of the piece through outstanding performances by many of the leads, The three women played by Jing Du, Sandra Tucker and Jennifer Enns presented a pleasant and delightful demeanour, while spirits Findlay Jesson, Jody Douglas and Margot McCrossan perfected their whimsical and free-spirited roles. The stars of the show, however, were definitely found in Papageno, Mono-statos, Paminaand the Queen of the Night. Although James McClary as Papageno struggled initially with appropriate force for the space, often pinching and shadowing his sound, the second half proved dynamic as his arias glistened for the audience. Mark Rowson’s brutish, evil interpretation of Monostatos seemed appropriate as his performance highlighted talent both vocally and theatrically, mastering the sinister character while maintaining superb vocal control. Despite great performances by men in the production, the women often dwarfed the men in ability. Soprano Zhu Ge Zeng’s perform-

ance as the Queen of the Night showed incredible control allowing Zeng to acrobatically jump through extremely difficult passages while still projecting and, more impressively,

The greatest disappointment of the performance rests in John Tute’s performance of Tamino. projecting emotion. Zeng delivered the most difficult vocal arias with ease, affecting and kissing each subtlety with emotion and passion. Jennifer Farrell as Pamina also dazzled the audience with the strong projection and cute character.

Farrell’s expression and ability seem sure to lead to an impressive career. Kathleen Hernden also delighted as the Old Woman/Papagena, pleasing audiences with her good nature and delightful range. It was clear from Dan Lichti’s performance as Sarastro that -=s he is not a student of music but instead a master of it. Despite the fact that Lichti was clearly the professional, stunning performances by 1

the subtleties of the piece were lost in Tute’s performance. Tute’s lack of rich texture in the upper ranges proved disappointing as the rest of the characters overpowered and outvoiced his struggling octaves, To be fair, Tute’s two-day notice may have impacted his ability to perform the role Despite its setbacks,. the overall performance proved quite majestic and ewarding for the listener.

Zeng, Farrell, Rowan, Hernden, the women and the spirits showed a high degree of calibre and the grea potential for similar careers ment of the perform Tamino. Due to illness, Iain MacPherson could not play the role of Tamino as originally planned but instead continued with Tamino’s spoken lines while Tute sang from the pit. Tute, however, was dwarfed by the many amazing voices on stage. Tute has a lovely mid-range but struggled greatly with high and low stretches of the role. Although MacPherson was still greatly expressive with his inability to sing, some of

As well, the orchestra often went without notice highlighting their ability to transfer Mozart’s expression and intent without difficulty. They provided a firm base and platform upon which to build the complexities of the opera. Director Heiner Pillar’s work on this performante provided great result despite poor administrative handling and a disappointing performance from the lead role.

D is for don’t plavthat song anvmore J

The sound of one hand clapping 20th Century Russia

K- WSympbony WENDY

Ovchestru

VNDUCEK jmprint staff

ast Saturday night I made my monthly trek to the Centre in the Square so I could enjoy my season subscription tickets to KW Symphony’s Masterpiece series. This month’s performance was 20th Century Russia, and to be honest, I was a bit apprehensive, having heard that this genre tends to be somewhat atonal and bombastic. What I got was an evening of fantastic, sweeping, occasionally atonal but always riveting music that kept me entertained

and impressed for the full two hours and a bit. The evening featured some of the very best Russian composers of the past century, beginning with an exquisite performance of Nikolai Rimsky-Korsakov’s Russian Easter Festival Overture, Op.36. The best words to describe the music of RimskyKorsakov are majestic and powerful. With this overture, the audience is invited to picture the Easter morning of an Orthodox Russian churc’h service, the apex of the liturgical year, and visualize the cathedral swarmed with people and priests. Following this superb performance, evidenced by a hearty and lengthy applause, was the Pulcinella _ Suite by Igor Stravinsky. Different in style but no less enthralling, the suite

is from Stravinsky’s version of an 18th century orchestra - no clarinets, no percussion, just strings, divided into a small (the concertino) arid a larger (the ripieno) group. The effect is a fantastic, neo-classical approach to 18th century music, and marks a departure from his previous path of Russian exoticism, romantic subject matter and large orchestras. Herein lies the key to Russian music - loud, large and generally an assault to the senses, the first time it is heard. Stravinsky’s music is beautiful now, but when it premiered, riots ensued. People don’t generally like to hear new things, even if they are expecting them. This might help to explain the audience’s reaction to Nikolai Korndorf sin D, a shocking,

atonal piece that had the whole place shifting uncomfortably in their seats. Mr. Korndorf was present at the concert, describing a bit about himself (he came to Canada 9 years ago so he could have freedom of expression), and even less about his music, preferring to view his music as an abstract expression of himself. In D was literally the note of D, sounding like a kazoo rendition of insect wings rubbing together-and it was great! I was surprised to find myself enjoying this abstract piece of music, hearing the melody develop and the story unfold. But while I found In D to be exhilarating and fresh, the predominantly middleaged audience wasvery unimpressed, describing it afterwards as a %acophony of utopian movie music.”

At the bombastic conclusion, there was silence, and then slowly, one person started clapping halfheartedly, the rest of the audience joining in rather sheepishly. Though it wasn’t well received, I think it: was a fantastic experience. At least there weren’t any riots. Concluding the evening was a moving, albeit long, performance of Dmitri Shostakovich’s Symphony A/o. 9, in E fiat, Op. 70. Like his comrades, Shostakovich is big and bombastic, and thankfully for the audience, familiar. Though not so melodic as Rimsky-Korsakov, or as boisterous as Stravinsky, it still tells a story, which links most 20th century Russian music - heartache and longing, passion and despair - music of the homeland,

ARTS

Imprint, Friday, March IO, 2000

A man with 4 hands RYAN

Red-nosedRudv a laugh J

Reindeer

Games

Dimension

Films

very once in a while a critic’s job to prove the ineptness of a film is made easier when a character actualiy points out the problem. InReindeer Games, this happens when Ben Affleck’s character, Rudy, talks to the antagonist about the convenience of his plan working out in almost every aspect. It is this convenience, and these contrived and formulai; plot twists, which make John Frankenheimer’s latest film a weak effort. Let me briefly set up the plot for you. Rudy (Affleck), just released from prison, meets

up with Ashley (Charh

one another for several minutes before killing each other (or not killing each other), as the case may be. Rudy gets so many second chances and so many “you’re gonna die” conversations that either fatalism is intervening or the script needs a rewrite. Having said that, I now must admit to liking the film to some degree. This is in part due to its wittiness. In the face of its brutality

On Dasher, on Dancer..

Theron), his cell mate’s pen pal. He changes his identity, of course, to get some action with Ashley. Everything seems to be going okay until Ashley’s brother (Gary Sinise), a firearms dealer with a short temper, demands that Rudy (mistaken asNick) aid him and his cronies in the takingdown of a casino. The rest of the story develops through near-death situations where characters talk to

Charlize Theron, who always manages to glow on screen. There has been a trend, as of late, to refer to anything in the least degree suspenseful as “Hitchcockian.” In reviews for this film, you will probably also notice the word “Hitchcockian.” Let me set the record straight; though Hitchcock stylized and to many degrees perfected the presentation of suspense on film, he did n& invent suspense. What should be said, without a doubt, is that this film could have taken a few pointers from Hitchcock on the presentation of suspense. It never helps, though, when at the midway point of the film you want the bus to miss the fifty foot jump. This is one of those action films where the bus could have missedand everyone would have been happy.

MATTHEW M~RKLEY Imprint staff

t might be the world’s biggest understatement to say that UW is not known for its art apprecia-

tion. However, despite the unending flow of microchips and math all about math, there are still some performances that you shoufdn’t miss. Next week, the St. Jacobs Schoolhouse Theatre will host Temples, featuring original dance choreography and musical composition. The production has been assembled by choreographyer Amanda Lowe-Pal and composer Arun Pal. Arun Pal is w’ell known in the local musical scene as the talented percussionist behind the Matt Osborne Band. The first half of Temples is dedicated to dance, while the focus of the second part is on music, though there is a joint improv scheduled for the two mediums. The original works

reflect Arun’s connection with modern dance, and will feature a piece where he plays drums, piano and sings all at the same time. The show will feature artists from al1 over Southwestern Ontario andToronto who not only perform, but will also sell arts and crafts. Temples appear at the St. Jacobs Schoolhouse Theatre on March 17 and 18. Tickets are $12 at the door,

(Ben Affleck goes through an absolute hell that should have him at least limping through the entire film) and its mostly unlikeable characters, RelrZdeer Games is funny. Though ludicrous, the film manages to pull enough laughs to keep on course, but it eventually gets knotted in absurdity. If there is anything redeeming about the picture, it is the presence of

Her next bad career move The Next Best Thing Paramount RACHEL

Pictures

E. imprint

BIETATTC& staff

lot of critics are saying that The Next Best Thing proves once and for all that Madonna can’t act. The truth of that statement is open to debate, but Madonna’s stilted pronunciation and disappearing and reappearing English accent are the least of this movie’s problems. The script seems like it was written by a monkey with multiple personalities; it can’t decide whether it is a feelgood comedy, a bittersweet emotional drama, or a preachy social commentary. Then, at,the end, they throw in some totally nonsensical courtroom custody battle. The plot revolves around best friends Abbie (Madonna) and Robert (Rupert Everett). Robert is gay and Abbie has a long history of falling for losers. One night things get a little crazy and Abbie and Robert end up having sex. A couple of months later Abbie discovers she is pregnant. Robert decides he wants to help raise his child and so Abbie and Robert move in together and live as mother and father but not husband and wife. Everything goes along fine until Abbie meets the hunky Ben (Benjamin Brat+ Robert, presumably jealous that someone else is prancing around

the house showing off his well chiselled abs, throws a hissy fit and things start to fall apart, in terms of the character’s lives and the movie itself. The movie descends into a cheesy custody battle; the filmmakers try their hardest to be manipulative and play with the audience’s emotions but fail miserably. They foolishly never developed any of the characters to a point where the audience feels anything for them except annoyance. It is unfair to single out Madonna’s poor performance in this movie; all the other actors are either overacting their heads off (Everett and Lynn Redgrave as Robert’s mom are the worst offenders) or give onenote performances that are so flat they make the walls jealous (Benjamin Bratt). Besides the script and acting problems The Neti Best Thing has very shoddy production values. Apparently the cinematographer thought he was shooting a film noir picture. Almost every single shot of Madonna is lit so that her eyesare in the light and her forehead and chin are in shado*ws This happens even when she is in a perfectly well-lit room and none of the other characters’ faces are in shadow. I wouIdn’t say that The Next Best Thing is proof positive of Madonna’s inability to act; it is more proof that she has poor taste in scripts.

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Frqiday, March 17 l-4PM - SK

CARAVAN

Coming Tues. March 21 SLC - IlAM-2PM

LRO

Mock LSAT (try to bring your own LSAT) Wednesday, March 15,7-l OPM (MC4040)

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Deadline:

Mondays

at 5 p,m.,

SLC’lfil6

IMPRINT is weekly until March 31, 2000

ription R&es i Canada $26,49 USA $53.23 Overseas $82.8Si

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TERM

SuBSCliIpTION l

Summer sublet - two bedrooms in quiet large house. $250 plus utilities, laundry and parking included. Keatsway at Amos. 588-2473. Summer sublet - May I-Aug. 3112000.Qown: town Waterloo. Mature, responsible student only. $250/rnmth plus utilities. Phone and cable. Call 747-2055 evenings, Summer sublet available - two bedrooms in a three bedroom apartment. $280 all-inclusive @goGable). Large balcony, free parking, five minute bike, 15 minute walk to UW. Call Rob at

888-6693. Room available in student house in Ottawa {Bay St.) May 1. Rent $285.00 plus share utilities. More info (613) 836-5871 or fax (613) 836-2067. May 1 - male/female room-mate wanted to share 2 bedroom apartment in We&mount/ Glasgow area.$30O/mo. Contact 5850295 OF MSKC-@email.com Must see sublet - Summer 2000 - large 4 bedroom house with laundry, parking, groceries close, free cable. $250 00 plus cheap utilities - negofiable. Twenty minute walk to UW, 10’ ceitinas. hardwood floors. Call 743-7901. Summer sublet = three bedroom basement apartment availablemid-April. Large tiwingmm, kitchen, backyard with shed, ample parking. Twenty minute walk to campus. $350.00 includes utilities. Erin 883-4070. Great Summer sublet - upper floor, huge window. On Lester Street, five minute walk, laundry, parking included Asking $250 plus utilities - negotiable. Call Adam at 885-9010. Attention graduate/mature students-twobedroom in nice three bedroom townhouse to share with young female professional. Twenty minute walk to UW. No tenant parking, room with separate entrance and bath $4001mo. Room with shared bath $3751mo. utilities included. Laundry, no smoking. 886-1268 after 5 p,m. Sept. 1, Summer sublets available for one to three people. Located at 206 Sunview Street between Laurier and UW (less than five minute walk to either). $310 all utilities included, price negotiable. Call 747-7760.

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University and College Whitewater Weekend - join students from across Ontario at Wilderness Tours on the Ottawa River. A funfilled weekend from June 9 to 11,200O. Rafting, camping, meals, live entertainment. Special rate $150 plus GST. Phone l-800-267-9166 or rafi@wildernesstours.com

Weekend Counseliors and relief staff to work in homes for individuals with developmental challenges. Experience, minimum eight-month commitment. Paid positions. Send tisuti to

Fall or Winter

$17.75

Don Mader, K-W Habilitation Services, 106 Sydney Street, S., Kitchener, ON I NZG 3V2 Fraternities m Soront~es - Clubs m Student Groups - earn $1,000 - $1,500 this semester with the easy CIS three-hour fundraising event. No sales required. Fundraising dates are filling quickly, so call l-88.8-923-3238 today or visit www.campusfundraiser.com! Summer Camp Counseilors on-campus Interviews for premier camps in Massachusetts. Positions available for talented, energetic, and funloving students as counsellors in all team sports including roller hockey and lacrosse, all individual sports such as tennis and golf, waterfront and pool activities, and specialty activities including art, dance, theatre, gymnastics, newspaper, rocketry and radio. Great salaries, room, board, travel and US. Summer work visa. June 17 to August 16. Enjoy a great Summer that promises to be unforgettable. Apply now! For more information: Mah-kee-nac - www.campmkn.com (boys}: l-800-753-91 18. Danbee www.danbee.com (girls): l-800-392-3752. Intetviewer will be on campus Wednesday, March 15 from 10 a.m. to 4 p.m. in the Student Life Centre. bo you need a summer job? Soqulck.com has 100 summer and 50 campus positions available. Apply online at soquick.corn. Win DVD, Palm Pilot, CD Burner, $100 just by visiting Soquick.com. Soquick.com is a Canadian Search engine that offers free e-mail with 10 meg. Click to win. Soquick.com hture animal-lover with car required for parttime assistance to small , busy petlhousesitting business. Highly organized, responsible. Resu& and references. At least two term commitment, Call Lynn at 742-0 175. he City of Waterloo IS seeklng qualified nstructorlguards to work at the Watetioo Swimplexfor the Spring and/or Fall 2000 sessions. These individuals will promote excellent customer service in the delivery of swimming lesson instruction and lifeguarding senrices. Minimum quaiifications accepted are RClLSS Instructors and National Lifeguard Service. If interested please submit a resum& with qualifcations or pick up an application form at the: Waterloo Swimplex, 101 Father David Bauer Drive, Waterloo, N2J 4A8.

June 28th to August 29th Live in Minden with IO other student employees $9.00/hr. PLUS Bonuses. Van Driver$ll .OOlhr. For details visit www.exefdean.on.ca

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Finally, a business that fits into your busy schedule! Freee-commerce business for first 50 who qualify. Call Micro Source for all the information you need at: l-888-71 5-8380. www.microsourceeap.com - surf the web? - vww.alladvantage.com will pay you while you surf. Please use FQJ-810 as your reference. Pilates Exercise Classes start the week of March 20. Call Stephen or Peter for more information. 8864972, ext. 30.

Kappa Kappa Gamma would like to thank everyone who supported their Twist-a-thon. Over $150.00 was raised for the Breast Cancer Society of Canada. Thanks for your help! Do you write more than grocery lists and assignments? How about prose, poetry, fiction, anything creative? We’re looking to bring together a group of people for the purposes of sharing writing and getting feedback. We aim to meet weekly in the SK. This term’s meeting day has not yet been set so send an e-mail to asklo@uwaterloo.ca including the times that are convenient for you, or if you have any questions at all. Cheap Campus eats!1 The Right Angle Cafe, the Math Society’s Coffee and Doughnut Shop, is open Monday-Thursday until 10 p.m., Friday until 7 p.m., and Saturday from 10 a.m.4 p.m. Check out our wide variety of breakfast, lunch, dinner and snack items....3rd floor MC. Guided Self-Change of alcohol use: for individuals who may have concerns about the amount they are drinking and want to cut down. Call Counselling Services (ext. 2655) to find out more.

Walk & Roll for Mental Health needs volunteers! There’s something for you. One to three hours per week, or when you can. Event happens May 7,200O. Call Lvnne at 744-7645. ext. 342. Join kUOS - a UW student, staff and faculty group that provides free tutoring and encouragement to high school students. For more information, e-mail buds@calum.csclub.uwaterloo.ca or call Sue at 886-2906. We need Big Sisters! If you are 18 years of age and older and feel you can make a three hour a week commitment for one year come to our next training session on Saturday, March 25, 9 a.m. to 4 p.m. at Big Sisters House, 37 Allen Street, W., Waterloo. Call 743-5206 to register. Come and help at the first annual Canadian UndergraduateTechnologyConference March 8 to 11 at University of Waterloo. Volunteers are needed on each of the days to help with Logistics. There will be free food and t-shirt for your efforts. If you need more information please contact Bruce at bcleesha@undergrad.math.uwaterIoo.ca or Nancy at nan c 143Wahoo.com Y KitcheAer-Water& Health Care Auxiliary is looking for a business/finance oriented individual to serve a

two-year term as Director of Business Affairs. Call 747-0965. Volunteer for Kitchener-Waterloo’s annual Heel ‘n’wheel-a-Thon upcoming event to help support the Crohn’s and Colitis foundation of Canada. Call 7482195. Learn about a different culture while you show a new immigrant bow to be a part of your community. For more information, call K-W Y.M.C.A. Host Program at 579-9622. Volunteer Canada is the national centre for volunteerism. The organization works closely with four provincial centres and 86 local volunteer centres across the country to promote excellence in volunteering. To visit the Volunteering Works link or for more info call l800-670-0401 or www.volunteer.ca Student Career Assistants needed for 2000-2001, Career Services is looking for students to fill a variety of volunteer positions. Depending on the position, you will gain valuable job search, marketing and/or career-related skills. Open to regular and co-op students who are creative and possess strong interpersonal and communication skills. Aoolications available at h&&/i www.careerservices.uwaterloo.ca/ docslSCA.html. Deadline: March 16,OO.

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FRIDAY, MARCH IO, 2000 Social Work Conference: Renison College Raising Our Community. Topics include volunteerism, schoolyard bullying, anger management, mutticulturalism, native life skills, foster care. 9100 a.m. to 4:00 p.m. No registration fee. SUNDAY, MARCH $2000 K-W Chamber Music Society presents “Jerzy Kaplanek, violin and Jamie Parker, piano” at 8 p.m. at KWCMS Music room, 57 Young Street, W., Waterloo. Call 886-1673 for info. MONDAY, MARCH 6,200O Come, now is the time to worship. 7:00 p.m- in Siegfried Hall, St. Jerome’s. A night of praise, worship, and prayer. The UW Feds clubs involved are Korean Christian Fellowship, Waterloo Christian Fellowship, Chinese Christian Fellowship, Navigators, Campus Crusade for Christ, Catholic Student Community, and Embassy. WEDNESDAY, MARCH 15,200O Rainbow Community Conversation Group (sponsored by Gays and Lesbians of Waterloo and the Regional Pride Committee) for issues

MONDAYS

eesmith, inc, is a WCAI funded, unique start-up company providing Linux based, aspen source produc t,s and services for small business. We are looking;c for the best and tk kightest c software developers t-o contribute to our vokrng corn paw.J’ / / c am--I dynamic

emsmith,

provides exciting opportunities for articulate people with strong critical thinking and leadership skills. Relevant technical skills include Linux, TCP/IP, Apache, Per1 and C programming, relational databases, HTML and CGI.

UW Outers Club - hiking , camping, kayaking, skating plus many other activities. General meetings at 6:30 p.m. in MC 4061. For more info: http:/ /outersclub.uwaterloo.ca FRIDAYS Jumuaa Islamic prayer is performed on campus fr:~m 12:30-t :OO p.m., MC 2035. For details contact Dr. M.I. Elmasry. ext. 3753 or elmasy@vlsi.

after coming out. Topic: “Dating” 7:30 p.m. Hagey Hall (Humanities) room 373. AH wetcome. Details: 884-4569. Faculty of Mathematics - Exchange Information Session from 3 to 4 p.m., MC 5158. Info will be available on current and proposed exchange opportunities for all Math students. Nutrition Drop-in from 11 a.m. to 2 p.m. in MC, outside C & D. Sponsored by Health Services. March is Nutrition month. Gays and Lesbians of Waterloo Coming Out Discussion Group. Topic: “Same-Sex Couples” 7:30 p.m. Social follows at 9 p.m. HH 378. Meet old friends and make new ones. All welcome. Details: 884-4569. SUNDAY, MARCH 19,200O Art Show 8 Sale of Landscapes in Oils and Religious Icons by Maria-Magdalena Franklin at the Waterloo Community Arts Centre, 25 Regina Street, S., Waterloo. Show runs March 19 tc April 12 Open reception from 2 to 5 p.m. today. For more info call 669-4265 or 886-4577.

Moscow! St. Petersburg! Opportunity to live and study in Russia. Beginner, intermediate and advanced Russian language, also courses in English available. WebsIte. www.rnterunrversity.ccm. Contact: info@interuniversity.com Study in Prague! Study at the Prague University of Economics, Central and East Eurupean Studies Program (courses in English). Look at our websttes www interuniversity corn or info~~interu~iverstty corn

inc.

Located in downtown Ottawa, we offer an excellent compensation package including stock options.

Earn university credits towards your degree through

wwv.e-smith.net

York University.

offered on campus, day OFe.vening, over the a.nd by correspondence. Internet

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Pleasefbrwtwd your resumeto: Emily Gregory *Ufax: (613) 276-0065 or email: eeg@e-smith.net.

Just follow these three easy steps:

give you an anline application as wei1 as Imfcmmtion about course descriptions and summ8r offerings 2. Get a letter of permission from the Uffice of the Registmt at your university.. 3, Apply to York and submit your letter uf permission no later than Friday April 14,2UOO

UNlVBRSlT~

UNIVERSZTY 4700 kele

Toronto, M3j lY3

Street

Ontario

OFI

Call Admission

Enquiries

(416) 7364000 for mom infmmatim and an application