2005-06_v28_no27_Imprint

UNIVERSITY OF WATERLOO STUDENT NEWSPAPER

FRIDAY, FEBRUARY

VOL 28, NO 27

17, 2006

IMPRINT.UWATERLOO.CA

Bands heat it up at Polar Jam

rhousands of students from UW and WLU gathered at the University Football Stadium as rock stars from across the country performed at the Polar Jam. Also included at the event were snowboarders and skiers demonstrating their tricks and a fashion show.

Faith-based vandalism drives groups to action lacquellne McKoy VlPRINT STAFF

~arlier this week Waterloo was hit by 'etanother act of vandalism, this time argetingtheMuslim community. The Jlegation, ''Prophet Mohammed is a )edophile," was found written on a nen's bathroom stall in Hagey Hall :arly Tuesday.

This incident is on the heels of , rash of discriminatory vandalism .cross campus, which includes four

acts of vandalism in the SLC targeting Gays and Lesbians of Waterloo (GLOW) throughout January and February. As well, graffiti left on the door of an office in Environmental Studies 2 last weekend has sparked campus curiosity.

Student Life special projects coordinator Rick Theis was among the first people to notice the slur in a third-floor washroom near the religious studies department. In an e-mail to a variety of student groups

Theis commented that "!.he thinks] the time is right for all of us, clubs, the Feds and the University to sit down and work out a coordinated coalition... to act as a mechanism for responding to and denouncing acts of hatred, bigotry, persecution and defamation if and when they occur on campus."

Theis and Feds VP internal Lawrence Lam brought together student leaders from a variety of faith- and cultural-based clubs forthe inaugural

meeting of an anti-hate coalition this past Wednesday. Among the representatives in attendance was Muslim Students Association president Wasim Parkar, who feels that "the university should startdelegating more resources•.. in order to facilitate education about different faiths and cultures; that is by far the most effective way to stop such uncivilized and uneducated acts."

Students For Palestinian Rights executive Mayar Al-Hatib is pleased

with the group's creation, but notes that "it's absolutely important for UW Police to start doing some tangible work in fighting [these] crimes on campus." When UW Police was contacted about the incident, Operations Sargent Wayne Shortt said, "Given the nature of the offense, it's an ongoing investigation in co-op~ eration with the Waterloo Regional Police major crimes unit." jmckoy@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

Jazzing up with the trio at Grebel Irian Fong "PRINT STAFF

[be jazz concert was part of Grebel's Noon Hour" series which invites ;uestmusicians to perform in front of :v'aterloo students and to the general mblic. :Michael Wood (vibes), Don ~nglert (alto sax and flute) and Kevin ,Iuir (bass) formed a trio and demontrated their talents on six jazz stanlards. All are well known musicians in =anada with each one of them having .chieved some form of experience and arne in the jazz scene.

Michael Wood is a long time Stratford performer and endorsed by Mike Balter Mallets while Don Englert was a former member of the legendary Buddy Rich Big Band and is now currently a University of Toronto faculty professor for jazz studies. Kevin Muir is also known in the Canadian jazz scene,havingperformedinmanyclubs and musicals such as Showboat and Sunset Boulevard. Of the three, only Michael Wood is from Waterloo and a faculty member forContad Grebel's music program (Don Englert and Kevin Muir are from Toronto)

All were at the top of their game with melodic solos and tight rhythm contributing to a great concert: The first piece performed was a welIknown standard called "The Days of Wine and Roses" by Henry Mancini.

In it, Michael Wood was first to show the audience his skills on vibes with fast sixteenth notes and deafening sound generated when he comped to make up for the lack of piano.

Don Englert made an impression in this piece with the smooth sound on the saxophone as well as his swinging solos. In addition. Don

also used his wide dynamic sounds to effectively provide the melody during the head of the pieces. Kevin Muir then demonstrated how loud he could play bass during the solo breaks.

The next piece that made an impression o~ the audience was ''A Child is Born" by Thad Jones. What made this song special was when Don displayed his doubling skills playing flute. He also showed his soloing skills were not dampened by a different instrument, giving fast runs and patterns in the melody while

maintaining a crisp sound throughout the piece.

The concert was finished off with two pieces called Oh Lady Be Good

by George Gershwin and One Note.

Samba by AC. Johnson. By the .end, " it was clear that the trio could make every piece soood "full" even with the absence of piano and drums. Also, it was clear that Michael Wood was the unofficial "leader" of this trio giving to the fact his longer soloing time and the introduction of tunes.

See JAZZ, page 21

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FRIDAY. FEBRUARY 17, 2006

news@imprint.uwaterloo.ca News Editor: Jacqueline McKoy News Assistant: Ashley Csanady

-Vandalism invades campus yet again Emma Tarswell IMPRINT STAFF

Earlierthisweek,mostlikelylate Sunday night or early Monday morning, there was anotheractof yandalism oncampus - this time in the ES2 building.

The act was targeted at Richard "Teddy" Dong, a student and teacher's assistant of the environmental

resource studies program.

From his office door a display of feathers and other natural objects showing off different aspects of what the environmental studies program has to offer was torn down. The words, "No more stupid feathers, you demonic witchcraft punk," were written on the door in black ink where his display once

was. This is not the first time that Dong has been targeted. The first act of vandalism happened during the summer term when objects were also torn down.

This also is not the first act of vandalism in the environmental studies buildings. Within the past few weeks, several acts of vandalism have occurred. A poster advertising

TIM AlAMENCIAK

Richard "Teddy" Dong's office in Environmental Studies 2 was a recent vandalism target.

the world religion conference was defaced, with the names of all the religions being crossed out except Christianity and a religious slur was written across the poster. The men's bathroom walls have also been littered \vith religiously based graffiti in recent weeks. An e-mail was sent by Dong to the environment and resource studies association members to inform them about all the acts of vandalism throughout the ES buildings.

Sara Macalister, a 4B joint environmental resource studies and peace and confl.ictstudies major said of thevandalism, '''The university has changed sinCe I firstgothere. When I walked in, it seemd alotmore supportive andithas changed.

You look at stuff like the vandalism at GLOW and naw the vandalism in the ES building. I'm not sure what has happened on campus to cause this change and [enate] this violence." . Dong has spent his several years on campus enhancing environmental studies. Over the years, he has been very involved in his faculty working hard to naturalize the Dorney garden outside the environmental studies building and also spending time attracting different species of birds to the garden to help beautify the Waterloo campus.

Tiffany Smith, a fellow student in environmental studies, describes Richard as "an enthusiastic ecologist with a love for \vildlife, birds and the people around him."

The majority of what Richard posts on his door is educational material such as articles aboutlocal wildlife and posters of endangered animals.

He says, "I put up these things to tell people that there is more to environmental studies besides trees."

Richard says that he "find[s] it funny that lhe is] called a demonic ;vitchcraft punk," and says that he is "really the opposite."

He continued, "the message did not affect me but what hurts me is that the article of the raccoon \vas given to me on my birthday by a professor on a field course. Them ripping that off, that's what hurts."

So far, there has been no information about the person or people responsible for committing this act.

Students in environment and resource studies have begun to replace the removed items from Richard's door with interesting objects from nature they have found on campus.

Richard's love for his program has not changed from the most recent attack; he said, "I have a strong interest in wildlife ecology and that's why I'm studying at this university." etarswell@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

Corrections In the February 10 article "V~ndals strike SLC again," GLOW volunteer Peter MacDonald's name was mispelled as Peter McDonald. We apologize for any inconvienence this has caused.

As well, the correct web address for "Ask A TA" is http://aata.ilc.org.

New medical program invests in region's future Margaret Clark IMPRINT STAFF

In a~move to improve the quality of health care throughout the Kitchener-Waterloo region, Md.1aster and Waterloo universities recendy announced the ereation of a satellite medical school here in Kitchener as the newest addition to the \1V'aterloo Downtown Kitchener's health sciences campus.

The accelerated program, requiring three years of study instead of the usual four, will accept 15 new students everyyearwith the firstgraduating class expected in 201 O. Public and university officials have high hopes that the new program will be able to counter the pronounced doctor shortage in Waterloo Region.

A co-location project between McMaster's Michael G. DeGroote's School of Medicine and UW's School of Pharmacy, the Health Scierices Campus has the city of Kitchener to thank for making the progressive new program a reality, on account of the city's generous funding of $30 million and the gift of land along King and Victoria. The financial and land-based support is considered a smart investment into the future of Tri-City health care, with Kitchener

Mayor Carl Zehr calling the initiative "a 10 on a scale of one to 10" and K-WMPP Elizabeth Witmer (former provincial health minister) describing the program as "a step in the right direction."

The health sciences' joint-university medical program comes as a dramatic but welcome response to the pressing call for more doctors and pharmacists throughout Ontario.

Studies have shown an increased likelihood of doctors pursuing careers in the regions where they trained.

Waterloo Region presendy has the largest grouping of non-teaching hospitals in Ontario and the new medical program will succeed both in providing a new focal point for existing health care programs and facilities, as well, as encouraging a fresh wave of research- and practice-based professionals to stay and address the health care needs of our burgeoning community. As the. health sciences campus is broadly committed to emphasizing an integrated or "shared care" approach to health services, the new program also promises greater efficacy in the delivery of future health care to the Waterloo Region.

Students in the program will first complete a four- to six-month

COURTESY uw GRAPHICS

UW president David Johnston and YIPs celebrate UWs satellite medical school. study period in McMaster's School of Medicine with preference given to applicants from and around Waterloo Region who indicate that they are considering practising medicine in the Waterloo area upon graduation. The students will then move to Downtown Kitchener campus where they will complete

their education in a manner befitting University of Waterloo's proud tradition of co-operative education.

Utilising the numerous health care resources in the region, medical students will be provided with "experienced-based training, placements and practicums," ensuring that

upon graduation, Waterloo's medical studentswillbewell-prepared- not only for the demands of medical residency and professional health care, but also in the broader community, as university representatives of which we can all be p~oud. mclark@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

4

FRIDAY, FEBRUARY 17, 2006

Architecture soc details supply issues COMMUNI1Y 'EDITORIAL We are writing to address some critical omissions and misinterpretations in yourrecerit article, "Students lose vital learning tools" (10 February 2006).

We would like to clarify that keymembers of the school administration are the organizers of the in-school supply store, not the Waterloo Architecture Students Association (WASA). The faculty and staff of the school of architecture have always been extremely supporrive of the studenl body, and especially so during thi! difficult adjustment period.

In fact, the director of the School Rick Haldenby, made the initial supply run to Toronto. Our graphic designer Gemma Selvanera generously donated a portion of her offic( to serve as the temporary suppl) store. She, along'with office assistan' Donna Woolcott, has devoted pm( to managing the store in addition tc her regular duties.

- James Andrachuk, WASA Presiden -

Michael Feinberg, WASA

HOUSE

Committee RepresentativE

When you live at the Waterloo Co-operative Residence, you get benefits that you just can't find elsewhere:

• Lower residence fees • Walking djstance to both· campuses • A variety of flexible meal plans • On-site laundry and maintenance • Regular organized social events • Inclusive and diverse membership • AND, most important of all - a say in how residence works - every day! '

5

FRIDAY. FEBRUARY 17, 2006

Rez fees to increase

Students generally accepting of four per cent rent hike Veronique Lecat IMPRINT STAFF

The UW board of governors approved a four per cent residence fee increase that will affect Village 1, Mackenzie King Village, Ron Eydt Village,Minota Hagey and UW Place. The increase means students will pay about $172 more for a twoterm lease, on average. The fees were also upped last September by five per cent; the fees generally increase every year.

When asked for the reason behind the increase, Pamela Charbonneau of residence life responded that it was "to cover increases in costs for utilities, cleaning supplies, salaries, equipment, maintenance, services and programs."

In regards to how the administration is working to control energy consumption, Charbonneau replied that "UW has a campus-wide program on energy conservation.

We monitor new and renovated residences over the first few years of operation to ensure that our conservation practices are right for the new facilities. If not, we make changes to the way energy is managed for them." Charbonneau also said that there was "no hesitation by the board to increase the fees" when asked whether there was any reluctance to increase them.

The Ontario Tenant Protection Act set its 2006 rent increase limit at two per cent, but the university residences are exempt from this regulation because the housing is not open to the general public.

John Andersen, president of Feds, explained that "I can accept increasing the fees, but there has to be a clear rationale," for which he

gave increasing costs as an example. ''The rationale to raise the fee was not initially provided for when the question to raise the fees was asked," Andersen continues,"At first, the only explanation was that the new fees would bring us 'in line with the market' or something to that effect (Bud Walker's [director of university business operations] rationale) ... [Walker] indicated some of the revenues would be needed for future upgrade plans - the Living Learning Project initiative was cited."

Students seem accepting of the increase. Leslie Havens (3B arts and business) believes that it's "fine ... as long as the services keep up with the demand. [Residence] is certainly a worthwile. investment in first year." Chelsea Munding (lB chemical engineering) suggests that "perhaps the government could provide some kind of subsidy for student housing since we have to pay for tuition." vlecat@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

New residence fees Village 1, Ron Eydt Village, Mackenzie King Village Single: $4,438!two terms or $555!month Double: $3,982!two terms or $498!month Interconnecting: $4,236/two terms or $530!month Suite-style single: $5,297!two terms or $662!mbnth

WORlD The opening shots have been fired in the university tug-of-war. Both UW and WLU announced plans last week to each gain another faculty. We're opening a med school, Laurier wants a law school and a teacher's college.

Granted, these are still the early days.

Our med school will.be attached to the school of pharmacy and affiliated with McMaster. UW started as a group of associated faculties attached to Waterloo Lutheran University and affiliated with Western. Is it possible that things might come full circle?

For some of the old-timers, the move t~ward a med school is a bit distressing. UW has made a national and international name for itself without either a law school or a medical school which is remarkable. Then again, the lack of either has allowed the existing faculties to shine even brighter. Is it any wonder that UW engineers are better than those of say Toronto, McMaster, Queen's or Western, all of which have medical faculties? \X'hile UW has both the school

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of optometry and the faculty of applied health science, neither has eclipsed the rest of campus the way that a medical school might. Currently, the planned campus is small.

At seven acres, the campus will be about the same size as Renison and St. Jerome's put together. If the city of Kitchener trips over itself to offer more land, it might expand. Expansion is Waterloo's middle name. After all, the first UW engineering class had only 75 students.

With a med school, the university would be able to brush up against the hoity-toity old money schools and say that it's now a real university, the lack of limestone buildings notwithstanding. The next step would be a law faculty, but Laurier appears to have beaten UW to the punch.

A med school does have benefits.

For one, a medical school attracts doctors and specialists to the community to teach, to conduct research and to treat those who come through the doors of the teaching hospital, or, in UW's case, the clinic. Second, medical students might go off and become highly successful specialists who might have deep pockets when the alumni office comes calling.

However, there can be drawf¥tcks.

A medical school has the potential to suck a place dry when it comes to fundraising. CT scanners are a lot sexier than math computer labs.

People have an easier time seeing the benefits of health research than they do in structure research. When the university comes calling, what cause do you think might attract more money? What other university projects might be sidelined for the sake of expanding the medical school?

Second, this is going to be yet another satellite campus for Waterloo. Ask the architecture students how much fun they're having in Cambridge. A year and a half after they moved off campus, there are still growing pains. Waterloo runs the risk of becoming a series of disparate campuses, where students feel a lack of community. Oh wait, too late.

However, when all is said and done, this is only the thin edge of the wedge. UW and WLU have both announced aggressive plans to expand their respective ~ampuses and reputations to make a big name for themselves. The question is, what will happen after uw, WLU and even Conestoga College have expanded into the unserved educational niches? Will they draw the bead on each other? Will there be a push to amalgamate?

Maybe the region will become a mesh of satellite campuses. Only time \vill tell nmoogksoulis@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

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6

FRIDAY, FEBRUARY 17, 2006

Get out of the library faster with new security measures

CAMPus

~CLIPS Emma Tarswell IMPRINT STAFF

No more lines

Students and faculty of the school will no longer have to wait for their bags to be checked upon leaving these libraries. Over the next six months, staff of the Davis Centre Ubrary and the Dana Porter Ubrarywill be tagging the thousands of books in the stacks of the two libraries. This security system will be 3M radio frequency identification. The Davis Centre's system is expected to be up and running for the fall 2006 term. Dana Portertaggingof

books is planned to be completed by September of 2007.

uw students take top prize Last month at Mcl\-!aster University, 156 students from 19 Ontario universities competed in a management leadership competition.

Students made teams of four, forming 39 teams overall, and competed in a simulated case testing their ability to solve problems which face many companies daily. Four students from Waterloo's accounting and financial management program took the grand prize. Melissa Lai, Sarah Lay, Edmund Li and Michael Tang, came up with the winning team of "Blue Balance" and have said that they worked very well as a team.

Members of the team won $5,000 and will be members of the first graduating class of the school's accounting and financial management program.

Get healthier withSSHA

From March 16 to March 17, Brendan Seaton, chief privacy and security officer, and Jane Dargie, privacy director at at Smart Systems for Health Agency (SSHA) will be giving the first comprehensive health privacy professional workshop for management and staff of health organizations in Canada.

The two-day tourse will be held on the University of Waterloo campus and will give people the knowledge and skills to develop a private health program. The course was developed

by SSHA, who are responsible for giving information to health care workers of Ontario. The workshop will introduce people with little knowledge of health informatics to its concepts and applications.

The Waterloo Institute for Health Informatics Research is offering a $200 discount to the first 20 people who register for the program. If

interested call 1-800-860-7901 or visit hi.uwaterloo.ca/workshops.

Students surveyed about UW

OnFebruary6,all first-yearandgraduating undetgrads were sent the National SurveyofStudentEngagement(NSSE).

The survey asks questions regarding class participation, use of e-mail to converse with instructors and interaction with other students when studying., which the students rate from "never" to "very often." UW collects the information gathered from the survey in order to make important changes to the university and improve the classroom environmentoncampus.Alluniversities in Ontario participate in this survey and a broad variety of students are expected to answer. The NSSE only takes 15 minutes to complete and is an ~t way to make a difference in the schoofs undergraduate program. etarswell@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

~~HERE

~THEM

EVERYWHERE Mohammad Jangda IMPRINT STAFF

Canada

:Mice, keyboards and telephones, oh my! Just thinking about them makes my naughty bits stir!

A recent survey conducted by CampusKiss.com, an online student dating site, found that Canadian youth are using technology to sex up their lives. Eighty-seven per cent of the respondents from universities and colleges across Canada reported having partaken in some form of virtual sex - 57 per cent preferring getting freaky through typing, 44 . per cent showing off their goods on webcams and 48 per cent liking the telephones.

The numbers were higher than what the surveyors had expected, not expecting that many youth to openly "embrace" technology.

But they explained that since the majority of current post-secondary students grew up using computers, it would make sense that it plays a big role in their sex lives. And you thought the Internet was only good for porn. Tsk. Netherlands

It was like shopping at Wal-Mart except everything was free and, arguably, it smelled less.

Residents of the island of Terschelling in the Netherlands were treated to an assortment of sports shoes, briefcases, hamburgers, baseball hats and children's toys after 58 containers were washed off-board a cargo ship that had been caught in a storm. Nine of the containers managed to wash ashore and spilled the majority of their contents onto the 路sands. Locals rushed out to get their hands dirty and start looking for their shoe sizes among the scattered debris. Police, who were brought onto the scene to guard the contents of the still-sealed containers, did not stop locals from picking out a few things.

Now if you'll excuse me, there's a beach full of hamburgers somewhere in the Netherlands vlith mv name on it - as long as thos~ damned hand-eating seals don't get there first.

United Kingdom

Higher education and路wo~ e ready skins - an unbeatable combination.

Today's employers want more than a University or College degree or diploma. They're looking for people who have the real-world skills and experience you'll get with a George Brown postgraduate certificate. Apply now and you'll have what you need to succeed.

Postgraduate studies at George Brown College.

Grad smart, WorkplaCE! ready.

It's England's version of "Catch the greased-up deaf guy." Several times a year, John Whetton gets his sweat on and is hunted through the British countryside by a pack of redcoats and their bloodhounds.

Odd, you might, think, but fox-less hunting has been gaining popularity in the UK since real-fox hunting was banned last February. Fox-less hunting is actutually a lot safer fo~ both horse and rider sinCe the route can be planned out before hand so that any danger can be avoided.

Whetton, 64, was路 an Olympic athlete in the sixties and has been, voluntarily, facing off against the hounds since 1985. Each hunt sees him running almost 24 kilometres, yet he is rarely caught. On the odd occasion when he is caught, the "worst that can happen is you get licked to death," he explained. Messy way to die, no? mjangda@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

7

FRIDAY. FEBRUARY 17, 2006

[)pinion@)jmprint.uwaterloo.ca Opinion Editor: \\'aslln Parkar Opinion Assistant: Jennifer Guo

Friday, February 17, 2006 -

Vol. 28, No. 27

s

d t ust

Student Life Centre, Room 1116 University of Waterloo Waterloo, Ontario N2L 3Gl P: 519.888.4048 F: 519.884.7800 imprint.uwaterloo.ca

is central to journalism, but most people focus on the wrong aspect. The central concept in that statement is the idea of trust. Journalists are trusted to give a dear picture of what went on.

There is a clear separation between advertisingand content, but when those borders startto blur, that relationship of trust is fractured. Let's say for a minute that you read a preview of a concert in Imprint. How long should it be?

One line. Mavbe two.

There is only'so much information you can give out about an event. The only way to fairly pre\1.ew a live event is if the writer has seen the band before and can testify to their prior performances. Even then, such an act warrants a maximum of 250 words.

But in discussion I was asked the question 'Why bother talking about things that already happened?" This is where the power of the media comes in to play. Journalists have the power to create buzz, to influence public opin-ion. Imagine a person calling out to a crowd of 12,000, "I have seen this band, and they are great. The venue ,\'as fantastic, and the organizers did a phenomenal job."

Do you think that crowd would be more or less likely to attend a futme event ran b\' the same people i~l the same venue? I think th~ answer is

Editor-in-chief, Tim Alamendak editor@imprint.uwaterloo.ca Advertising & Production Manager, Laurie Tigert-Dumas ads@inlprint.uwatcrloo.ca General :Manager, Catherine Bolger cbolger@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

Editorial Staff Assistant Editor, Salim Eteer Cover Editor, Irshad Mulla Photo Editor, vacant As:;istant Photo Editor, vacant Graphics Editor, Claire Mousseau

.'\"isram Graphics Editor, Aiden Stanler \\'cl> Editor, Chcol800 Park Assistant \'{-'cb Editor, vacant

Systems

Adrninistrator~

Gautam Khanna

Sys. :\dmin. Assistant, vacant Lead Proofreader, Suzanne Gardner Proofreader, Scott Houston Proofreader, PaulllIarchwica Proofreader, Veroniquc-: Lccat Proofreader, Bdan Fong

Office Staff AdYfrtising Sales Assistant;, Jason K.enney Distribution, Tiffany Deiak Distributi()1l, Amy Pfaff

It's not until vou're confronted with a blank page, coffee c"ooling on your keyboard stand, that 500 words seems like a lot. It's tmdoubtedly an enormous space, and also an enormous opportunity to express something - anything, really.

Then you run into the problem of 500 words being too small; sentences need to be focused and refined. All words colour the interpretation of a given piece. And as we've seen with recent European issues - the press has power. Journalists are the underpaid, under recognized influential people in tbe world.

I'm not waxing black for bope of recognition; instead trying to give you some idea of the role we play at Imprint. We are trusted to be (relatively) unbiased obseryers of events on campus.

But something seems to have gotten lost in this statement. Everyone will accept that tbis

editor@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

BAR FLIES she shot down?

/\Jycrtising .Assistant, -Karcn YiJun Chen

I looked her riant in the eye and said" Baby::' yotl wOl..!ldn't

So I bit he:' in the ass!

But she didn't believe me.

1<l'IOw Q good thing if it bit

YeAh. I didn't let it Board of Directors

clear. People will absolutely be more inclined to go to another event done by the same.

Honest media coverage is more beneficial to an organizer than cheaply 'wrought free advertising.

Content-vise, pictures from concerts look great (if you can get up close), and backstage interviews are always interesting to read Of you are allowed press passes). But when none of these things happen, the event passes by the media and thus the public is slightly less informed.

Echo doesn't do live concert reviews - and tor good reason. They are catering to an enormous city \vith many promoters. \'{'hen you get into things like that, promoters get ravenous and violent. On our small campus, however, concert reviews are beneficial to the student populous. \Ve essentially have one promotional unit: the student government. Of course there are multiple institutions involved (J'he Crew, board of entertainment, etc), but it is ImjJlillt:r position to hold alJ institutions on campus accoumable. If the Feds are constantly bringing flaccid acts to campus, then we a.re obligated to expose that.

And we are also obligated to let stud.ents bow that the Feds are doing a good job.

you in the ass!"

bother me, though.

That'll teach her,

boatd(gJimprint.uwatetloo.ca President, Dan f;.Iicak president@imprint.uwaterloo.ell Vice-president, Sarah ."Jlmendinger "p@imprint.uwater!oo.ca Ti'ca,urer, Jeff Anstcl1 tteasurer@limprjnt.uwaterloo.ca

Secretary, 'v-a cant secretary@imprint.uwaterloo.ca Staff liaison, Darren Hutz s taff.liasion@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

Production Staff

Religion is not

Dean \Vhelton, Jeff Anstett, Darren Hutz, Shivaun Hoad, Simon Yarrow, Michael Davenport, l\hrgie j\lansell Imprint i:i the official student newspaper of the Univer-

sity of \\'o.tc.doo. It is an editorially independent ne\1;'Spaper published by Itnprini PubJir.ations, Waterloo, a corporation without share capital. Imprint is a member of the Ontario

COMMUNIlY ,EDITORIAL

Community Newspaper Association (OeNA). Editorial submissions may be considered for publication in any edition of Imp1iHt. J;"printmar also reproduce the material commercially in any format or medium as part of the newspaper database, \Ntb site or any other product derived

This is my first time '\vriting anything for Jmprint, and it's about religion to boot, so right off the bat I'd like to state that no offence is meant to from the n='Spaper. Those submitting editorial content, anyone of Christianity or any other religion and including articles, letters, photos and graphics, will grant Imto offer my sincerest apologies in adv:ance if any is print first publication rights of their submitted materiaJ, and taken. (Views presented here are, of course, only as such, agree not to submit the same work to any other my own.) Religion is always a challenging topic publication or group until such time as the material has to discuss (particularly in a public forum), but I been distributed in an issue of Imprillt, or Ifrpriflt declares feel it is being necessitated by the recent rash of their intent not to publish the materiaL The full text of this hate crimes here on campus. agreement is available upon request.

Over the past couples of weeks, several inI11JjJli1lt does not guarantee to publish articles, photo路 stances of graffiti spouting religious intolerance ;>;raphs, letters or advertising. Material mal' not be published, have blackened the walls of the SLC and other at the discretion of Imprint,if that material is deemed to be buildings on campus. Events such as these hurt ~belous orin contravention withln.priflfs policies with refer.. the reput.ation of many religions. As a Christian, once to our eode of ethics and journalistic stJll1dards.

I f-ind these actions running strongly contrary to 111lprinl is published every Friday during fall and ",inter the basic precepts of the Christian religon, which lerms, and evcrysecond Ftidayduringthe spring term. Imprint is supposed to be founded upon compassion reserves the right to screen, edit and refuse advertising. One and love (though the way things arc going, if the copy per customer. l;ffptintlSSN 0706-7380. Imprint CON general population here at UW is starting to doubt Pub Mai] Product Sales Agreement no. 4()065122. , that, I'm really not surprised). While there is no way of knowing if the indiv1.duals in question are Next board meeting: Christian, there are, unfortunately, occasionally February 17, 2006 hate crimes of this nature done by members of the Christian commul1ity and, as such, \vorth

eant to be about hate discussing in the Christian context.

No matter how a Christian feels about homosexuality, there's no doubt that taking hateful actions toward anotherruns contrary to the second commandment "Love thy neighbour," which Christ stated in Matthew 22:40 as being one of the two most important commandments. Hatred of theLGBT community has led to mmder, violence, suicide, suffering and misery ---the e.'illctopposite of everything Christiar.ity is supposed to stand for. It is unacceptable that something so minor in t.~e biblical context has been used to harm oUr fellow hmnan beings to such a great extent. It is unfortunate that the actions of a few can reflect negatively on many, but that just makes it all the more imperative that the religious community takes it upon itself to renounce these hate crimes and remind the TJW community what religion is really about.

These actions are made even worse to me because they are being done in the name of God. I believe that, in gt.>neral, we should avoid citing God as the reason for any specific action, because by acknowledging that we are imperfect, we must accept tbat we \'lill likely, at some point, Ullli"ltentionallydo e,";J in God's name. This in turn, hurts the reputation of any religion (history being fraught with examples). Instead, just do what you believe is right. Then, when someone says to you, "Hey, that was goorlof you---whydid you do it?" that is the time to refer to your God, rather than assuming from the get--go'you really know what is best (especially if you happen to subscribe to a religion like Christianity where the fimdamental

belief is that we inevitably get things wrong). All too often, we fail to realize the harm our actions may cause. \Ve cannot always know if we have hurt or upset someone, or if someone has been left crying because of us. In Matthew 25:40,jesus says, "Inasmuch as ve have done it unto one of th~ least of these my'brethen, ye have done it unto me." This can be seen as pertaining not just to the good we do, but also to the evil.

TIle most recent graffiti stated that homosexuals are "a sin in God's eves." Aside from the fact that sins are acts, not pe(;ple, running around accusing people of being sinners is pointless: we are all sinners. Christianity is rather explicit on things like tIus -- for instance, 1fatthew 7:1,5 says "Judge not, that you be not judged. Why do you see the speck that is in your brother's eye, beit do not notice the log that is in your own eye?" or the more famous, "Let he who is without sin throw the first stone." \Xlhether or not you believe homosexuality is a sin, surely it would be at the bottom of the heirarchy compared to violence or this spreading of hate. This is the time when the religious community should be# coming together and reminding people what it is really about: it's not hate and fear, but love, understanding, compassion and trying to make the world a better place not for ourselves, but for our fellow man . .I don't know about the rest of Uw, but God only kl10WS what I wouldn't give to live in a world \vhere the W01'st si.n \ve had to deal with was love.

- Amber Cantel!

8

FRIDAY, FEBRUARY 17, 2006

The SLC's tainted rep "I" was dotted with a little circle, and it was readable. Now, I know it's a stereotype, but nine times out of 10 it does hold true that male handwriting absolutely sucks. Calling my handwriting "illegible" would be a kindness, and most of my classmates who fall within the male persuasion are the same.

One of the disadvantages of being a That a female would have been co-op studentis that you aren't always the one to write the message is very aware of everything that happens on odd indeed - scrawling graffiti is campus. When you and your friends typically more of a juvenile male are scattered to the winds, it's very prank, giggling as they carve "cock" hard to keep all of your grapevines into their desk. It may be out of going strong. For this reason, the character, but that is what I get from first time I heard of the vandalism the picture included in the article that has been hitting the SLC lately from last week. was when it was printed on Imprint's That, however, is something that webpage. irritated me when I first saw the article Now, vandalism on campus is last week. The picture of the graffiti nothing new. It is a sad fact, but should never have been included in a fact nonetheless. Between the the newspaper and not because of amazingly short life expectancies of the message it carried. the V1 windows and the amount of The act was one of antagonism, scratched-in obscet:lities on any deskrebellion and hatred, but it was like surface from the Dana Porter to limited to affecting only those who SCH, it's obvious saw it. lt was imthat vandalism mediately covered IIThey now have is an entertainup by campus ing pastime of a police for a reaphotographic ptoof son reprinting it large. number of Waterloo's stuin all its hateful that they had the dents. glory makes that The thing ovaries to carry out effort something is that the vast of a moot point. such an attack/' majority of this Further'qreprint'\> vandalism is usuing it grires the ally done in: a) person who did drunken abandonment, b) the privacy it a huge ego boost.They now have of a bathroom stall or c) both a and photographic proof that they had the b. This is what makes the vandalism ovaries toearry out such an attack and that occurred last week odd - it (very likely) get away with it. was out in the midst of the SLC, a Of course, this is something that highly public area, and not off in nearly every major media outlet does the relative privacy of a dark corner at one point or another I won't presomewhere. tend that Imprint is the first. When a This means that whomever wrote Liberal riding office was trashed and the message felt safe in doing so covered in anti-gay graffiti a couple - either they knew that there was years back, The Recordhad more then no one around, or they felt that no a few pictures of the graffiti in their one would care about what they coverage of it. were writing until they were gone.

While I fully acknowledge that the It was a very public display of the marring of the SLC was newsworthy fact that they had confidence in and warrants relaying to the student their actions. base at large, the news article itself The other odd part about this would not have suffered had the vandalism was the writing itself - it picture not been included. is distinctly feminine in nature. The gbarclay@imprint.uwaterloo.ca lettering was big and rounded, the

Deciding before discussing COMMUNI1Y

. LJ EDITORIAL

fuB-IN-

STEREO

On Sunday, February 12, Peds Council had its 10th meeting of the term. One of the first items on the agenda was the Feds service review recommendations. These are the recommendations given in the Internal Administration Committee's (IAq report on the Service Review as to how Fedscanimprove its services. The recommendations include the cutting of two services and altering the name of another, along with several other suggestions for the other services.

Recently there has been some protest to the review. This has come mostnotably·from the volunteers and coordinators of the two services who made up the majority of the people in the usually empty peanut gallery at the council meeting. These groups are not involved in the services that could be cut, but are involved in other services that had recommendations made to open the services up to more students.

The group seemed to be upset by not only the recommendations, but the methodology used to acquire these recommendations.

A specific proposal that one of the coordinators was opposed to was a definition that was given to describe a service. The recommendation being opposed was one that describes services as "being important to the student body as a whole." The coordinator feels that this definition alienates the two services that are scrutinizing the review. Of course, services are open to all students. But the advertisements that have been made would allow these services to be more open to the whole student body, while still fulfilling their current mandates.

During a generic discussion of the recommendations, a councillor read out how they felt that the report is derogatory in nature and explained that the methodology was flawed by its sample size and sampling method. I wished to discuss some of the problems that some people have had regarding the report, but council decided that it was too sensitive in nature to discuss. How can the council possibly make a decision that something is too sensitive to discuss

without bringing up what has to be discussed? I suggest that in the future the council may have to choose to enter in camera discussion if they are required to discuss sensitive topics, rather than avoid them.

Prior to Sunday's meeting, I had discussions with other councilors about the methodology and some of the sections in the report. The sections of the report that were considered "offensive" to some appeared to be somewhat ambiguous in how they were being interpreted.

I also had spoken with many of my constituents regarding the recommendations in the report and the majority of students I spoke to were quite welcoming of the recommendations that were being offered.

Hopefully at future council meetings, councillors will not be afraid to discuss things that need to be addressed. The service review has now been tabled two council meetings in a row. Do councilors truly wish to see discussion on this review? Or do they just hope that this review will disappear and never be discussed again?

- Kevin Redmond Feds Science Councillor, 2005-2007

POSTSCRIPT

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The real and unreal COMMUNI1Y

LJ EDITORIAL

Let's do a little mental workout. What if Heaven or Hell is simply the state of mind that you die in, with your imagination running wild as your body fails and the moment stretched to infinity as your metabolism slows down? Does it scare you more than ever?

What if you could take a moment, rip out the feeling and keep it forever?

Well let's get more realistic: what if you could build a machine and live in a dream, however you want to live?

Is life still worth living?

Do you see what I am getting at?

What is reality and does i~ matter at all? The line between real and unreal, if there is one at all, appears to be a thin one sometimes. This is hard to follow and yery intangible, but bear with me. Here's a simple example: think of the very popular movie, The Afatrix. A huge population of people, lying unconscious, dreaming away their lives in slavery. Takingan idealistic and theoretical approximation, their lives were no differentthan whattheywuuld have been if they were indeed really awake and living. And it is not that

outrageous. Considering that everything that we perceive is through our brains, the only part.of us that needs to be alive is our brain; the only problem being that the brain needs the rest of the body for survival. The body can be considered as a system of sensors perceptive to different sensations, which they amplify and send over to the brain to make sense of and from which to (:reate the world we see and feel. The concept of colours demonstrates this very simply, as colours are actually created in our heads; in reality they are just electromagnetic waves of different wavelengths and frequencies.

Of course,- the main objectiye of any living organism is to reproduce and ensure the passage of its genes. One can't reproduce in hibernation, so we can't just forever run away from reality and live in a dream world. However, the idea follows behind the relatively recent concept of artificially attaining perfection, mainly bodily perfection before or until now, as the present technology allows us. This just took a very ugly turn for a lot of readers, I'm sure.. A lot of people are still very uncomfortable with the idea of plastic surgery and artificial beauty, but it is one of those unavoidable side effects of the path that humans are on. The , harsh truth of the matter is that in an ideal world where humans did not have the power to challenge callous

nature, the weak would die of the merest disease, even weak eyesight could be the cause of death and the unattractive would be extinct due to lack of mates. This puts plastic surgery on the same ground as any sort of medical treatment: it is a fight against nature. This puts my "dream machine" on the same level as anything we do. lt is a step toward a more perfect, however artificial, life.

Iseemtobedrawingupana1ogies~

over the place to try to justify a dreadfullyunnaturalidea.Iwilldefendmyself stating that itis more ahoutrea1izingthat the big choices have already been made and the main path that humanity has to travelhas already been startedori. When we came down from the trees and out of the caves, it was because we wanted more, and because we had outgrown the machine that made us, rather like one of those science-fiction movies where artificial intelligence picks arms against its creators. So maybe one day the rit;:h vlilllead youthful retired lives and the poor will take vacations to artificial ''heavens;' and it .can be as controversial as homosexuality among many circles. And the conclusion I can dra\v, I suppose, is this: "real" is whatever that can be achieved and whatever can be imagined; perhaps everyone can own his own reality, as he drifts away from others.

-Ali Alavi

9

FRIDAY, FEBRUARY 17, 2006

because of this and hate begets more hate. That's a lesson for everyone to learn.

- David Tubbs 28 honours arts

Ignorance is not the solution

Facing the facts

To the editor,

To tbe editor,

My reaction to Tyler Andrew Gilbert Emoff's letter to the editor was the same as my reaction this past spring when I visited Palestine: a sense of profound disillusionment with the gap between what people outside of the occupied territory know and what actually occurs in the occupied territory.

I remember tbe day that Sharon was visiting the United States and I watched Sharon make a pledge to Bush that Israel would halt the expansion of settlements. To the rest of the world, it seemed like progress was being rnade. Yet, as I walked passed the construction sites around the settlement of Maale.Adumim builtin the \X;!est Bank, I knew that it did not matter what it said on CNN - what mattered was what happened on the ground. Despite Sharon's promises tbe construction continued under my eyes.

Emoff's beUicose letter makes many claims which only expose his lack of awareness about the Palestinian Israeli conflict. Before calling I-Iamas terrorists," ] to read about the Irgun and Levi and the terrorist actions which allowed the state of Israel to be formed. I challenge Emoff to speak to the brave Israeli peace activists who risk being killed every Friday in Bl'ine, to protest the construction of the apanheid wall.

Mostof all I challenge Emoff tovi5it All(hal.il (Hebron) (or to speak with any Israeli solder who has served there), and learn about Buruch Goldstein who opened fire on over 29 Muslims while they prayed; or simply to walk down the streets of the old and witness the graphite on the homes of Palestinians stating things like "kill the Arabs" or "Arabs to the gas chamber."

You are correct, Tyler, violence is not the solution - neither is ignorance.

In response to Tyler Emoff's letter to tbe editor found in tbe Friday, February 10 paper, 1 would just like to point to some facts. First of ali, it is true that Hamas does not recognize Israel's right to existence; it is also true, however, that some Israeli leaders failed to recognize Palestine's right to exist. Golda Meier, an Israeli prime minister who was never considered a terrorist, stated, "There is no such thing as Palestinians. They did not exist." (Sulldq)! Times, June 15,1969) Secondly, resistance is a right for people under occupation. The Israeli occupation is still in full force today \vhile against all UN resolutions since the occupation in 1967. All peace talks after the recognition of the PLO of Israel's right to exist in peace including the Oslo Accord, signed on September 13, 1993, calJed on Israel to\vithdraw from occupied land and stop building settlements. Instead, more settlements are being built as well as an illegal apartheid wall on occupied land.

Finally, server of Palestine stated, "the sustainable option for addressing the current economic and social deprivation [of the Palestinian people] lies in lifting the occupation - an occupation that has only brought misery and suffering to the Palestinian people for more than 37 years," (United Nations. Press Release ECOSOC/6132.July 19,2004). For more information, visit the United Nation's website, and search under "Israeli occupation." This will lead you to numerous press releases addressing the various war crimes committed by Israeli forces.

- Gloria Ichim Grad student

Too much hate

To the edito?; I have been quite taken aback by the recent discrimination that has taken place on our tair campus against the GLOW boards. I personally have no strong opinion for or against homosexualit}', I tend to take people on a person-by person basis. \,I/hat distresses me is that they would voice their hate against a very,-vorthy group Like GLOW >Uld that this person is using God as their front. 1 ask the hate mOlwer doing this, "\\'ho in the hell ar~ you to ~peak for God?" 1'0 bring religion into a problem of iite:style is only a cheap front for a person way too insecure with himself or herself to believe in anything else.

Yes, this person should be taken out back and beaten for their words of hate, but enough hate has been spread

- Una AI-Dajani 1B environmental studies GLOW vandalism disturbing

To the editor, I have not been involved in GLOW meetings recently, but like them, I am equally horrified by the homopohobic vandalism thatwas directed at GLO\x' recently outside the Student Life Centre (Imprint, February 10,2006).

1 directly experienced homophobia in my history classroom in the \\Tinter of 1973 \vhen my TA spoke in class of "stupid, dirty, fucking faggots" and I decided to come out of the closet and respond to his violent words. Soon aftenvards, while I sat in the front ro\V of a lecture, my professor stood in front of me during his entire talk with his pant zipper very close to nw nose. I also never received mv essay for that course and got m~ ElJlpb-stamped return enyeJope in themail.Mv professor told me that I was insan~ to be gay and ordered me to go to counsellim!: ASAP. c)

I have tried to speak out for a safe university enyironment at GLO\V meetings and especially when the future leaders of the Federation of Students came to our meetings to discuss LGBT issues before the elections. I also spoke out in favour ora safer milieu on campus radio and at the Iced-In Black Film Festival.

Clearly there is a need for a safe person- safe space programme at the University of Waterloo similar to the project that was. developed at the University of Manitoba in 2001-2002. I urge all students interested in Federation politics, all GLOW' members and friends and the LGBT advisory committee to work harder to ensure that teaching faculty can no longer abuse students and to ensure that students do not have to worry about coming out of the closet.'

-Ron Welker Alumni, 1975

Sensationalists at Imprint

To tbe editOi; In February 10,2006 issue of Imprint, the top right corner of the front page says "No end to hate crimes / Vandals deface a wall at SLC, page 3" But when one reads the article on page three, the only reference to "hate crime" is in a statement by a GLOW volunteer. I praise the objectivity of the authorsin refus· ing to label the act of vandalism a hate crime as a matter of fact. But T would urge Imprint to be more objective and less sensationalist in its front page design.

care whether a candidate was a captain of a campus rec volleyball team? Is that even relevant? No. I want to see candidates with shortand-to-the-point bios about what fh~y want to see change 011 campus, not what everyone wants to see and a small blurb about why they should get my vote.

- Colin Werner

38 computer science and business

Csanady wrong again

To the editor, Csanady's article two weeks ago in

Imprilltwas contradictory, stereotypical and grossly misinformed. Csanadv really makes a blunder of femini;t ideoiogy. "One of the most powerful tools women have is their sexuality."

Last time I checked, my sexuaiity (whatever that encompasses, seeing as how it is such a large and somewhat ambiguous term) did not get me into university, get me my summer jobs or even get respect. So how powerful is this tool reallv? It's a shame that many people have ~hese narrowly ignoran"t views of feminism. What many feminists have tried to achieve, asid~e from legal equality, is to give ~vomen the opportu.nity to put the sexuality away and apply different aspects of ourselves, including our intelligence and creativity, in order to accomplish our goals, both professional and private.

I particularly enjoyed her comments about wearing asexual clothing and de-sexing ourselves to be taken seri, ousIv bv men. This has to be one of the ~;st ridiculous comments I've ever heard. Once again, you missed the mark on feminism. One of the key fundamentals of feminist theory is challenging what is considered "fen1inine."

She cries "stereotype," yet she further proliferates many of tl1e existing stereotypes --- fe~inists are asexual bitches that secretly have penis-envy.

Here's an interesting thought.

Not all women think high heels, frilly lingerie and tight clothes make them a woman, or are even qualifiers, or indicators of their sexuality and "femininity." \'{'ith that said, manv feminists do wear makeup, lingeri~ and even high heels. Because lets be honest, even those sturdy and trusty Birkenstocks need to be aired out once in a while.

-

Dimple Khurana

38 honours history

EXTREME CENTRE Unjornmatejy l\!1ark John.,on SCO/NJ1ltt wil! flot be appearing thi.r wee/". Stqy ttmed, Extreme Cmtn; will return nexlllJeek.

··-J.Y. Kao 3B computer science and pure math

Feds election blowhards

To tbe editor, Firstly, they all say the same shit in a different fashion. Whoop-deefucking-doo. I tried to read their platforms, but they are all the same.

Way to go!

Secondly, the issues that are brought up are mostly all supported by students: B2 Green, etc. Why don't you bring up some issues that are a split with students, lil<e smoking on campus? And why we pay a man-in-a-green-suit to sweep up all the smokers fucking garbage? And why people stand in the doorways of non-smoking entrances? \Vhy not be daring and say something that will make a lot of people happy and piss a lot of people off like: ban smoking on campus.

You aren't going to win by saying I'll do this for yon when everyone wants todoit and the other candidates are saying the same damn thing. No wonder no one yotes, because no matter who gets in they aU do the same thing! \'iChy doesn't someone come up with some new or fascinating ideas?

Thirdly, there ate 14 candidates.

Each one has about t\vo "tYlJed" pages of what 1 like to call verbal diarrhea, meaning that it's a bunch of crap that Ho<··one reall\' cares about. I mean honestly, do'l really

Everyone wants a happy ending..

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10

FRIDAY, FEBRUARY 17, 200E

IOC breaks its own rules Olympics violate policy and seek big name sponsors

Something struck me the other day as being a little odd, and no, it's not Stephen Harper's cabinet.

Hmm ...

Okay, so I guess two things struck me as being a little odd. But I digress.

I happened to be skimming through the Olympic Charter whilst procrastinating for my five midterms last week, when I came across the ''Mission and Role of the International Olympic Committee," more specifically item number ten.

Both items sandwiching item ten seem to be legitimate. Item number nine supports encouragingmeasutes to protect the health of athletes, which is certainly reasonable as athletes require the healthiest of lifestyles to perform at their best. Item number 11 is similarly prudent in stating that the IOC should encourage and support sports organizations and public authorities to provide for the social and professional futute of athletes.

Yet number ten sticks out like a sore thumb, which stipulates the IOC "oppose any political or commercial abuse of sport and athletes."

What's strange with this is not its sensibility, given the basic ideals of the Olympic movement and Olympism. Instead, it's the complete and utter failute of the IOC to abide by this code.

With the contemporary Olympic format sttuctuted to make it a money making machine for its mega-sponsors like Coca-Cola and Visa, it's next to impossible to go more than

Instead, it's the complete and utter failure of the IOC to abide by this code. ten minutes without another tiring, scripted message from a used athlete professing their love and thanks for their sponsor.

Somewhere along the progres,sion of the Olympic Games from its modest but sincere beginnings to its current state, something has gone awry, and the true spirit of simply appreciating athletic achievement has mutated into appreciating athletic achievement brought to you

by Nike.

IIEST COMIC

r''; '411 COI'If

The IOC, despite a clear condition that states otherwise, has done nothing but push the trend towards whoring off athletes in a marketing campaign that will make them and their corporate equals every last dollar, euto and peso.

It has even gone so far as to allow professional athletes to compete, something that Sutely has former champion JimThorperollinginhisgrave.Afterall, it was he who had his two gold medals stripped forviolatinghis amateur status having played a mere handful of minor league baseball games for what was Sutely a pittance.

This really is of no fault to the athletes as they are but pawns in a system of forced dependence on corporate funding to stay above the poverty line while they train and compete at the sports they have dedicated their lives to.

What it comes down to is the integrity of the IOC, or whatever is left of it after the revelation of slimy under-the-table dealings and bribing a few years back. The onus is on them to draw backon the commercialization of amateur sport and start working towards accordance of their own guidelines and morals exemplified by item 10.

Then again, knowing the IOC, they'll probably just remove it.

Ii Meltls? { '-.......

uPl... ..1 }

kruch@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

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12

What does an NDP MP do?

Running for a seat in parliament as an ND P candidate is a lot like playing the lottery: the odds of it happening are pretty damn shitty to begin with and should you win, the first thought that rushes to your head is "Oh my God!", quickly followed by ''What the heck do I do now?" Of course, the rewards that come with winning a Federal election as an NDP are every bit as valuable as the riches obtained from winning the lottery.

Any MP can make a promise, but an NDP JlviP can make any promise.

As an NDP MP, you will often find yourself using the line ''An NDP government will insert promise here."

The beauty of this line lies in the phrase "NDP government," which as we all know, will never happen.

Should the promise be fulfilled, you will forever sing your own praise.

Should the promise be unfulfilled, it will be the fault of those scumbag Liberals and Conservatives. It's a win-win.

As an NDP MP, you will be doing a lot of complaining,Imean,youhave to appear to be doing something to earn your paycheque.

Half of your complaints will be about the decisions made/things said/bills passed in the House of

Commons. Whether or not you personally agree with the decision made/thing said/bill passed will be irrelevant. What will be relevant is the fact that your party did not make said decision/ say said thing/propose said bill.

The other half of your complaints will be about the injustices committed by the party in power. You will be making these complaints in the stead of the official opposition, because they in all likelihood committed that same injustice a couple of months ago when they were in power (see: crossing the floor). . "Here's the great part: no matter how much slander you throw at the Liberals and Conservatives, you will never be retaliated against, because every attack made against.an NDP is an opportunity lost to attack a worthwhile opponent.

Other great benefits to being an NDP MP include, but are not limited to, being loved by naIve university students, getting to grow a really cool moustache and just being really cool in genÂŤral.

I also hear that every NDP MP gets a top secret card that entitles them to a free three topping pizza with the purchase of a large Coke every time they go to Domino's.

I may be a Conservative, but when I grow up I want to be an NDP MP. To have all of the powers 6f a Conservative or LiberalMP, butwith none of the responsibility - isn't that the Canadian dream? spreisman@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

FRIDAY, FEBRUARY 17, 2006

Modern TV women just don't measu're up Bles, BLAHNIKS & BRAS As a child, I wanted to be a mermaid more than anything else in the world.

I moved on to wishing to take the pink Power Ranger's place and by the age of 10 my dream was to be a vampire slayer. I guess I lived vicariously through my favourite female characters of the day. NQwadays, however, I'll just settle for myself. .. or maybe the next Carrie Bradshaw.

In my life, I have loved two teen dramas: BtiffJ the Vampire Slqyer and The O.c. The huge differences between these'two shows never really hit me until recently. Ok, I know one was about living on the hellmouth and the other is about spoiled rich kids, but other than that there are similarities abound. They are both set in California, have an endearing, cute geeky boy, a macho ''hunk,'' the' bitchy brunette, great soundtracks and cameos by some pretty kickass groups. Until a recent episode of The O.c., I never realized just how different the portrayal of women in these two shows is.

Tbe '90s found us surrounded by independent, strong teen heroines.

Although I was a loyal BtiffJ fan and never watched any other teen dramas, however, the other teen girls on TV at the time still seemed much stronger than the Marissas and Summers on TV now. There was intelligent, driven and independent Joey and, of course, super-hero Buffy and the Wiccan Willow. When you compare the women of the 90s with the ladies of The O.c., the nineties definitely win the girl-power war.

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After watching Marissa cower and cry as Ryan saves the day (this time unsuccessfully) week after week, I must say I'm fed up! Whatever happenea to the ass-kicking, quick witted Buffy? She saved the lives of everyone around her and the world, all while running around in knee-high boots and high-heels. She looked great, she was intelligent and she never needed a man to "save the day." Even mousy Willow grew into a st;rong independent and powerful woman, leaving the men to stand on the sidelines and watcb. In BtiffJ, the women were the heroes; in TheO.C. the women cower, cry and drink while the men rush to their sides make everything better.

Bow many times did we see BtiffJ as the helpless character? Even when

her Scooby gang was at its strongest, she always fought the big fights alone. . She was never the damsel in distress; she was her own knight in shining armour and she never, ever swooned.

Buffy could kick any guy's ass and not even break a nail. Sbe was a positive role model for girls, fighting evil while going to scbool and only occasionally slipping up (sleeping with Angel may not bave been the best decision).

Compared that with the weak-\villed, bi-curious, alcoholic Marissa (potentially every guy's fantasy), I don't think there is much comparison.

I miss the girl power '90s with Buffyand the Spice Girls tellinggirls they can do it all and look fabulous . acsanady@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

746 6893

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13

FRIDAY. FEBRUARY 17, 2006

EATU

features@imprint.uwaterloo.ca Features Editor: Kernet Bahlibi Features Assistant: Jing Huang

pposite rules for p osite sexes .They say clothes make the man, but women definitely make the clothes PEOPLE

PERSON Jeff Anstett So I was in Uptown Waterloo the other day trying to buy a suit jacket and I ran into a friend of mine named Dwayne. Now when I say I ran into him, I mean I hit him with my car. Don't ilsk me how it happened, let's just say "someone" \vas singing along to '~frica" by Toto rod "accidentally" started dancing during the breakdown and spilt hot coffee on "someone's" most tender area. Long story short, Dwayne needed medical attention and I needed a new coffee. Walt, I mean "someone" needed a new . coffee. (phew, that was close.) So as we sat by the side of the road waiting for the ambulance to show up and his internal bleeding to stop, we had an interesting conversation which I would like to impart to you.

Dwayne told me about a fancy date he and his girlfriend Darlene had. He told me about how he had to get all dressed up in his "pa's" stufly suit and even wear a tie. ''1 never really minded getting all dressed up," I told him. "In fact, I kinda like it." 'flihat's ~~ for you ~o say;' he said, "but :ion't forget you're talking to it guy who only wears pants if he knows he's going to court that da}:" But apparently his girlfriend Darlene took one look at him in his suit and couldn't take her ::yes off of him again. ''You is lookin' prettier than the dog that time he done get into my makeup," she told him.

And that's when it dawned on me. Nowwhen [say it dawned on me, I mean the sun had finally come up, which means I was finally sobering up. And in my sobering twilight, I came to a strange conclusion about the difference between men and women and the world of fashion.

Women's clothing is all about seduction. Less is more. Women's clothes tease you by showing

off certain curves and certain attributes. On the other hand, with men's clothing, the opposite is true. The more clothes a guy wears, the more attractive he becomes. (Case in point, sherpas are sexy.) They try to hide the awkwardness of the male body.

Take for example a suit and a dress. Suits are widely regarded by many women as being a way to make an otherwise dull guy look

presentable. Have you ever heard the phrase "He cleans up well?" It's a fine example of how clothing men is approached. The male body, although functional, is not exactly as breathtaking as the female form. So we try to hide it with heavy, scratchy pants and thick jackets.

We even go so far as to dangle little strips of fancy fabrics from our necks in order to distract passersby from our true forms.

The dress, on the other hand, was created to allude to the female form, to compliment it.

A dress sways when a woman walks, which accentuates her curves. A dress is usually tight, or at least tight in certain spots, which also serves to draw attention to the attractiveness of her body. A dress highlights the female body as a thing of beauty.

Now let's look a little more intimately at the unmentionables of both sexes: underwear. Girl's underwear is designed, not for comfort, but for appeal.

The bra presents the chest, it does not clothe it. No one wearsa bra for warmth. No matter hov,. many times my sister tells me that her bra with the fur trim is forwarmth,I still find the need to take her boyfriend out on long country drives and tell him about the knife collection I keep under my bed.

Men's underwear, on the other hand, is functional. Boxer shorts are loose and flowing. tryingto tell the world ''Nothing to see here. No one's smuggling anything under this tent. Carry on about your business." They're AlDEN STANLEY covered in either funny

designs or something as simple andinconspicuous as plaid. (Who dreamt up plaid anyway? Oh yeah, the Scots.) Men's underwear is worn to keep a man's business from getting caught in the zipper and otherwise try to make people forget that there's anything funny going on.

Women's underwear draws more attention than it averts. Low rise bikini briefs, French-cut panties, thongs-they are designed to look sexy.

They all draw attention to one part or another of a woman.

At this point, Dwayne points out to me one glaring problem with my theory. ''You done forgot about them granny britches that mama wears around the house on Saturdays. There ain't nothing sexy about them."

I agree. Granny panties are by far the most unappealing form of clothing in history.

But I ask Dwayne, '~e granny panties really all that different from boxers though? Is it fair to condemn them as unappealing just because they don't draw attention the way others do?"

"Don't ask me," Dwayne says, "I don't wear boxer shorts." '~you'reatighty-whiteytypeof guy then?"

(I've changed my mind. Tighty-whiteys are by far the most unappealing form of clothing in history) ''Nope:' says Dwayne. ''You don't mean you wear those men's thongs ,then do you?" I ask. ''You mean路'a, banana hammock? Hell no.

You won't never catch me wearing nothing like that," he says. ''Then what kind of underwear do you wear Dwayne?" I ask, now rather confused. ''1 don't," he says. "Mama done always told me two things. Number one, never get hit by a car while wearing dirty britches and number two, if you can't do something right, maybe you shouldn't do it at all."

Thankfully at this point the ambulance showed up. Dwayne went to the hospital and I went on my way trying to find a suit jacket that didn't make me look like my uncle Bob. janstett@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

What can you get for a macaroni noodle?

Apprentice candidates roam the Student Ufe Centre trading creamy Kraft Dinner for bigger and better things Kemet Bahlibi JingHuang MPRINT STAFF

The Waterloo vs. Laurier apprentice competition is in full steam as the events get more and nore challenging with each week.

After losing their task two weeks ago, ~raterloo's team was left with only two members as opposed to Laurier's six. Diane Kelly and A.shley Foster of team Waterloo chose Mossab 8. Basir and Jason Shim of team Laurier to ~ven up the teams.

Last week, February 8, seven volunteers were recruited to help outin the task. From these seven, fourwereonlygoingtobechosen-twoforeach ::earn - by the team members themselves. All the volunteers were put in one room while the :ontestants were separated in two other rooms.

Each team was able to ask up to 35 questions by ~-mai1 to the volunteers, whose identities were :lever revealed, which, in the end, would help :hem decide which two they wanted.

For the task, each team was given a box of 'extra creamy macaroni and cheese" valued at lbout $2, and had to roam the SLC trading it

for bigger and better things. Whichever team gathered the most things in the end won the task. However, there was a catch. The team members had to remain in the rooms and could only communicate with their volunteers with vvallcie-talkies. .

Team Laurier's volunteers returned with a bag of Campinos, a five dollar bill, earrings, a couple of books, and Brubaker's special of the day - a burger and chips.

Team Waterloo's volunteers decided to open their box of mac and cheese and trade the individual pieces of macaroni for items. A few things they came back with were a hat, a Dubble Bubble mug filled '-\>1th bubble gum, $50 Jostens certificate, pantyhose, t-shirts, a computer mouse, Sports Illustrated magazines and most impressive, a pair of shoes.

Jonathan Miller of team Laurier was fired in the boardroom. Amy Bernstein was also fired because of her absenc;e. The remaining two had to choose a member of the other team to even things out again leaving the teams three on three. Jason was back on team Laurier.

See APPRENTICE, page 14

Team Waterloo comes together to devise questions for potential members.

14

FRIDAY, FEBRUARY 17. 2006

Stemming the rose SBX

ALA eARTB So I talked to this buddy of mine, who's friends with this dude that talked to his sister's boyfriend's brother's exgirlfriend about sex. But this wasn't your typical sort of sex at all It was anal sex. But what's most exciting is that in the story he told me, this girl wanted it more than anything and that the guy who was to deliver wasn't even sure if he was going to be into it!

How often does that happen? As far as I've heard, it's usually the guy who takes his time trying to sweet-talk his paftner into "doing it in the ass." But I Was pleasantly surprised that this stereotype was broken when I heard my friend's story. The girl absolutely loved and craved anal sex. At least, that's what my buddy told me. And then another stereotype clicked in my mind: Guys typically make up so much bullshit when telling stories of friend's

.. WHISTLER II LAKE LOUISE II

SILVER STAR

friend's friends. But to be perfectly honest, I believed every word.

Some people are pretty easy to talk to about anal sex, though; most are on the other side of the fence. In some parts of the world, anal is a completely regular tendency in the bedroom. !twas first implemented in order to make sure that no one got pregnant, however, in most cultures it is now accepted as a way of life. So what types of people have anal in our culture?

Potentially, anyone can indulge in anal sex. Thepersonyoulastspokewith could have just had a rocking night of butt thumping and you would never know the difference. There is no one specific personality ttait that leads one to the trials of the rear. Some people do it and other people don't, it's just that simple. For me, it's been my lifelong policy not to shit where you sleep, so as of now, I've never taken a journey in that direction. It's not my idea of a fun time to be left looking like a pooh-sicle after a stint with the ass, not to say that this will always happen. Sowhatthe hell does it feel like?

I've been told many stories of anal being, "the best ~ in the world" because it's just another tight spot to

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ram your mini-you into. But is it really that good? While most guys say yes, I've heard many females, as well as gay men, saythatthey don't like it too much or that they would rather be the passer and not the receiver. However, there are the rare cases, as mentioned above, where the girl just can't get enough. So really, I would say that you would need a give and take approach to anal sex for most couples (at least at the start). If you're a guy and really enjoy blasting it in the bum than you should come up with ways to compromise with your partner and let them know that you would be willing to experiment with some things on their mind. Just make sure you don't sign anything.

So really, once you're at the point where you and your partner are comfortable with the idea of being bum bunnies, you probably want to make sure of a few things. Most should be left to personal preference, but here are some topics to cover. Should you wear a condom? And, if you're not wearing a condom, does your partner want you to pull out? As well as the idea of ever expecting a blow job after your fun in the bum. But that's all a lot of thinking, which might not be your thing, so if you're already there, I would say to just go for whatever makes you and your partner the happiest.

But here's a tip from the word on the street (a.k.a. the SLC great hall): "lube it up or you're gonna need alotof luck!" So I guess it would probably be in your best interest to have some sort of pettoleum jelly at hand when getting ready for action. And here's a serious note. It is very important to realize the risks of ttansmitting sexual diseases via anal sex due to the easily made tears in the rectum. Do not engage in this type of activity with a person until you are sure that they are clear of any Sills that can put you at risk. Be careful, have fun and if you're thinking about whether or not you should have anal sex, i:hen you probably already know the answer. Right? Right.

Continued from page 13 The recent task for both teams challenged the apprenrices to redesign a computer lab for PRISM Laurier. Team Waterloo presented their proposal ofincorporating several components to the lab, including a workspace for groups and one for laptops, computers and a cafe-type rest area. They backed all claims with AutoCAD designs, blueprints and diagrams of sorts.

While Laurier had upped the number of computers in their lab, they felt that they needed to focus on addressing the needs of persons with disabilities. In t:I;le end, team Waterloo's presentation proved to be better prepared, and far more convincing. At one point, Jason of team Laurier had voiced his opinion on Waterloo's choice of resources, resulting in a negative impression of Laurier's competitive attitude.

Organizational chair of the event, Natai Shelsen, later addressed both

teams with the importance of ethics and fair play, and didn't hesitate to mentionJason's comment as "against the spirit of the competition."

PRISM announced that team Waterloo had asuperiorpresentation, and a unique aspect of design.

Consequently, team Laurier faced Dr. Doherty-a.k.a. ''Trump''-inthe boardroom, where they awaited theverdiet. Project manager Celine had tried to take responsibility for the actions of her group, beforeJason admitted to his behaviour. As foreseen, Dr. Doherty acted upon jason's breach of ethics, and in the end, he was fired.

Upon leaving the competition, they had askedJasonwho he thought should remain in the competition. He replied that Briana had put a lot of time into theproject, constantlyworIOnghardfor the team. Laurier's supervisor, Melinde Whitfield, confirmed this, and with that Celine was also fired. kbahlibi@imprint.uwaterloo.ca jhuang@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

rcole@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

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Goodness that'll make you crumble Fruit dumpling (a recent addition}: a whole apple tilled with spices and raisins is covered ill a flaky pastry and baked. Usually served in a dish of vanilla sauce. (Not officially a part of this family of desserts, but just as yummy.)

I share with you one of my favourite recipes for a fruit cobbler. I find this recipe easy to make, but: even better is the flexibility you have with the fruits you use. The ones I recommend are just a guideline but feel free to substitute with a few peaches, pears. bananas; apples, etc.

Tiffany Li SPECIAL TO IMPRINT

In asmallbowl 0: usuallyusemyliquidmeasur-

ing cup for this) mix buttermi1k and egg together and then add to the flow: mixture. Mix just to incorporate. do not overwork the dough.

Dollop spoonfuls of biscuit dough evenly over the top of the fruit; leave a border around the edge of the dish for spreading; (Optional: At this pohit. you can drizzle the surface with melted butter and dust with sugar.)

Set on a cookie sheet and hake for 25-35 minutes until the tQDis golden brown and the fruit juices bubbling. , Cool fur 5-10 minutes before serving. Serve

withheavycream,whippedcrearnoricecreamO: recommend President's Choice Coconut Cream Pie ice cream).

Makes about 6-8 portions.

Enjoy!

As a baking enthusiast, I thought I would give you the "lowdown" on something that has Fruit cobbler plagued many a person - okay maybe just me Preheat 0Vl!1l to 400 Fahrenheit.

- but have you ever wondered why a cobbler, 1 pint blueberries ' crisp, crumble and many others are called just 1 pint raspberries that? These desserts - give or take a fewingre1 pint bIiCkbetrles·· , dients - are usually comprised of fruits and a 1 • ~hulled and sliced in half flour/ sugar/butter topping of some sort. granulated {depends I did a bit of digging and thanks to my trusty on how sweet you like. it, I nOrmally use less food dictionary, here are the terms and mean~ sligar) ings in all their glory and uniqu~ss! .Pillch of cirulamon Betty: a topping made with buttered.bread. crumbs which is scattered over fruit. .'

2 tablespoons comstarch Budde: something that can beplll4e~¥l tw9 . different ways: '.: ; ".~ :,;~;t.<' a) a cake batter makes the bottOni: '~,.' the berries are mixed in, then the ~p '. with a crumb topping. ..... ." ..' . ..... b) the same as a), but with ~:a~~~~ ments: rather than mixing the ~ti!S:itl . the cake, it comprises the secon44tieE: " crumb topping follows. '. " Cobbler (}':tlm - a favourite of fruit or fruit filling covers and is cover,ed With a (pref~eisupto the all tiitftUit or scattet drop it by hatldD:1J1&~••.. crunctlv topping is crumb,.ted flaked

de8rees

1~ 1/2~

~gar

'.

(as the softer and notis · and is crumbled over the fruit. ' ..

Grunt/ slump: the only fruit de~in this •group tha· . baked, but has the fruit~ A biscuit do . rolled and ['fut OAtop of the ft:JJ,iL ,(Apparently the name «grunt" came froniht~oise the people made when th~ate •. . rt.) .. ,' '. . ~;Doughisrolledout~dplaced over the fruit: "'The texture of the~ping is . . crumbly. .• '~;~~"

,f.rreading week

Stephanie Theis IMPRINT STAFF

are le{t

. of,yourfrlendswho you should spend eVery hour ofreading~eek , . re fe11owloseis, but. '. ~ schoqIWork. ~.I¢ aplan ()f what needs \(1'.5. Spice it up with a to be done, divide evet1lY :leroSS your days off,

T~fiwreasonstof... gooctabout$taying

home for readingwuk

.

1) Quality time with yow: parents. '.~~. .. .

Z) You won't get sunbumed.

Don't be envious of those who are t:ravelling'beaclFQM:ropi¢lt..thetne.)andsetlimitsor~$llChass&oolworkin to warm, exotic places for their reading Wl!ek.

7) Go on, be a J,dd. Throw. slumber party the riloming ~aIld thars it· .

3) . No chance of food poisoning or Instead, create your own perfect holiday that ,fur your besttiSt best buds in the whole wide Perhaps these things aren't what you want contracting hepatitis B or C. costs much less and is almost equallyentettainworld.Purpo1Iely rent movies that youtemern- to do for your reading week. In that case, my 4) little chance of foreign food upseting. The first five ideas are could be things th~t .bet as awesomely had such as Teen Wolf.! and only suggestion is for you to conie up with ting yow: stomach and givitlg youd1a.rrhoea or . you would do on any vacation. .

11, Labyrinth, and ~ Ninjas. Otherwise your Own: list·of tllings. that.yOU hi~ wanted throwing up. .5) , You wolft havetci learn how to say 1) Pamper yourself. Visit any loca,l~- '. ~t movies that yo\rlhpUght~ scatyas a' . ' to do but htiven't bea\ulieyou,;lackedihe time.

I and where are my pants?" in an· store and carefully select items thaq'PUmight child, sllci1 ~1~t~l!~ Cemetety.Q1-Silen<;e 'With a WlIol~ weekoff;:yOuh~nQieason «Where find at a spa. To get the most for your nloney~ of. the'I..arnlj~ .... . . . ' . not to:atco~plish at .·.~~ta fe:w:'of y.our other language. go to the ttavel-size product displaywb,ereyou'll 8)B.~y6Urroom Wiihyqw:~- .<wishes• .F&ppy'R,eadiOg Week or, er. Happy stheis@jmprint.uwaterloo.ca find miniature soaps, facial and body sCntbs,.. rnateSgooe. theywort'tmind yoqpilinglaundiy Va~tiOningt body wash and other luxurious items tlw you bask~ fullof underwear in the hallway. Take a, would find at a spa. If your budget alloWs, gu ·.tlharit:e.it.O:feng.sll~ your "envij:onmentt'~ . to a local spa and relax. .' .... ." .9) ... ~;~owthatyot:rIi!Wethe·tU;ne, .

JY8f_~ANlGHfOf£B.M..I!EmO, .

2) Trying your luck at stomashlrig toteip~· . you . . .. ' FtatouM tO~~'Qi HeI\(.GcmHIOCO\lElt,NOAnmJI)1;,tlQOlIESSCOI)£, '. food is half of what vacationing is at,f·a!:>out;'~%>.tngthay.ijtdebit'Ot goodyou~:.l>eenplan- .' ';'_~~~lOlH£~OF ..

Since you're stuck, er, choose to $tay:lio~~t ... ~ t6~ I£.you already make thls'a~y . _WliU~y~PQUR atarestaurantwhosenameyoucan'q,ronoUnce cominitnient, try volunteering at a diffierent (or read). organization. Suggestions include do~titJg 3) Get sloshed. Staying at an all-illclusiv:e ..... bi (pleasenbte, this does not wdtk,weu ~ISGOODlOGCt" . resort means you'd be drinking heavily, so rai~ •.. ; 6), work at a soup kitchen or go a glass to freezing.:your ass! youi~obe arid d()nate. clothes;' 4) Sleep. You know you wanna. Besides, that youriever wear anymore. If you want 00" ~"AKES1I1ISNlGHf8'tsi'oRMSPlNHII\IGOEUCIOUSNlNl8EAl'SlOTleE FREE SPIRITED TRtPSTERS just because you're nodn a fancy hotel with make volunteering a regular part of your life, ~.ww .

• GROOVE IS IN THE HEART AS DJ. GBJIG( ANIHOIIYTAKES CONTROL OF THE DANCE research some local charities or organisations sheets that have a 700 thread-count and big • PERFEG PRICED PITCHERS, A SAVORY FOOD MENU AND NO COVER KEEP IT fluffy pillows doesn't mean you shouldn't catch and start this week. up on much needed beauty sleep.

10) You could ac~ally do schoolwork and 5) Hit up all the concerts that you can. At work ahead, or get caught up if you're falling least you can pick your entertainment instead behind in your studies. Obviously, not the most of being forced to watch some cheesy dinner exciting thing to do during reading week, but entertainment at a resort. most likely beneficial. This is not to say that

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FRIDAY, FEBRUARY 17. 2006

CROSSWORI

What sport is Alissing in the OlyntpicsY haW

"Interprative dance. Figure skating is too wussy."

Chris Langley and Claire Basinski

"Beer-boggining. So you can get stupid-drunk.

Julie Nemish II

4A history

2B planning

Across 1. Chinese life energy 4. Coffee brand 9. Noodles 14. Short Leonard 15. Potato state 16. Spoken to the group 17. Crocodile relative 19. Two dimensional shape 20. Informal language 21. Lacking self-confidence 23. Shallow container 24. Former US Secretary of State 26. Daily duties 28. Essential part of the PB and J (2 words) 32. Block passage through 35. Written music 36. Computer key 37. Baby action 40. Small drink 41 ~ Limbless body 44. Used in ultimate frisbee 47. Childhood disease with a red rash (2 words) 50. Breadths 51. Avoided capture 55. Sugary solution 57. Licensed establishment 58. Medical flushing 59. First of its kind 61. Walter Ostaniek's instrument 65. Robert Burns aside 66. Card symbol 67. Computer monitor 68. Inside men ,~9%: Di,slik,e,d J 70: Sight Down 1. Belt buckle

organ '

"Naked tackle ping pong.

Just picture it."

Anthony Difeba

"Muff diving. 'Cause I'll win it."

Sayeed Rajan

3B geography

1B math

2. Common greeting 3. Relative by marriage 4. Petty critic 5. Mammalian enzyme 6. Nocturnal mammal 7. Suprised exclamation 8. Ukrainian beet soup 9. Egyptian paper to. Everything 11. Inuit sculpm,e~edium 12. Sandwicb fish ' 13. Yem~port ' , 18. Generat1y incompetent 22. Stov~'OOp 25 ~ Pral~~ and glorify 26/Dd:-lt.:.yourself shorts ,?-,7.on 29 ister company 30. tncrnmost Great Lake 31. Short representatives

LAST WEEKfS

32. Horse food 33. Quebec party 34. Unofficial poll (2words) 38. Metal-bearing mineral 39. Not be dead 42. Sri Lankan money unit 43. Male ex-pupils (2 words) 45. Cut off 46. Marketable name 48. Basque terrorist group 49. Stir violently 52. Prepare for winter take-off 53. Atlanta university 54. Divine Comedy author 55. Monty Python meat 56. Toronto football player 60. Golf pe~:", 62. Accountant 63. Feline 64. Poem

CHESS PUZZLE Composition

"Chess. So the geeks can compete too."

Alicia Lepine and Kati,e Gretzner

UPolar bear punting. 'Cause it's hard to kick a polar bear far."

Jeff Dennis

2B kinesiology

2B planning

"Tray boarding, with V1 cafeteria trays."

Anastasia Khaperskaia and Nurin Jivani

"'Duck Duck Goose: Canada's national bird."

Guru Kandasamy

2B honours science 4A health studies

3B kinesiology

White to move qJX}l'ÂŁ

2 1 5 4 6 7 9 3 8 9 3 7 2 8 5 1 4 1) 8 4 6 3 1 9 '1 2 5 7 8 3 1 5 4 2 6 9 6 2 4, 8 9 3 5 7 1 5 9 1 6 7 2 3 8 4 1 6 9 7 2 8 4 5 3 4 5 2 9 3 6 8 '1 7 3 7 8 5 4 1 6 9 2 The Sudoku for this week has been moved to the Arts seeton on page 21.

+9.JX H 9.JN "z SCOI +tPN'J ,:l;)4\SUY

18

FRIDAY, FEBRUARY 17, 2006

arts@imprint.uwaterloo.ca Arts Editor: Angelo Florendo Arts Assistant: Margaret Clark

Grad House fright night Rap on their own terms urban music spectrurp, they can't expect to push huge album sales. Intellectual and grounded hip-hop is a shock to the pop music system, as For those of you who don't care to know what is evident by BET's decision to pull the trio's "Laffy Taffy" is, or what finger snapping jig video for their album's lead single "Lovin' It" from primetime airwaves for being "too intelaccompanies the song, keep it locked. And have no fear: North Carolina trio Little Brother ligent" for its target audience. And no, that's has arrived to offer a dope alternative in an era not' a misprint.

The dudes are obviously frustrated. Fruswhere gang bangin', dope slangin' and various trated with the record execs making the power other gimmicks have come to represent hip-hop moves. Frustrated with the politics of a simple culture in the mainstream. . record review (both major industry publication, While making a tour stop in Toronto, the crew labelled by some as next in a line of hip- . XXL and The Source, had internal conflict develop regarding their respective ratings for hop groups such as A Tribe Called Quest, De The Minstrel Show.) But most of all, frustrated La Soul and Brand Nubian, generously took that listeners aren't being given the opportunity some time to sit down with yours truly to to hear their message. After nodding to their discuss their message and the general state of the rap game. Rappers Phonte and Big Pooh music through two albums and a mixtape (their 2002 debut The Iisteningand 2004's Chitfin Circuit (third group member and full-time producer 9th Wonder was busy in the studio) were candid Mixtape) and now having heard their prerogative on the state of the game, it is painfully obvious about what they believe to be the problems that their frustrations are justified. with the state of hip-hop today.

COURTESTY OF THE BAND FROM PLANET x Regardless of their struggle, Pooh and "Not everyone directs their music towards The Band from Planet X land on Earth to freak out the Grad House audience.

Phonte took the stage a few hours after our 16 year old white girls," says Phonte Coleman, immediate punk sound, rockabilly breaks and 29, saying instead that he avoids targeting encounter and threw down an energetic 40Angelo Florendo minute set that was a unique display of lyrisurfer progressions added unexpected flavour his music towards any particular audience. "I IMPRINT STAFF cal chemistry, on top of being as real as any mean, we all wanna sell a million records, but to the band's already unique approach.

Seeming a bit nervous before the set, bass- I'm not gonna record a duet with Omarion just act can hope to come a~ross. Although 9th Nestled atop the slightest hill in the middle was'noticeably absent on stage, his signature ist Matthew Hopkins was out of his element to get a plaque." In fact, both Phonte and his of Waterloo's campus rests the Gtad House, snare-acce~tuated production proved a perfect partner-in-rhyme Pooh agree that at the end for his first performance on keyboards his an unassuming place with walls older than restrained head-banging almost justified the of the day, the only people they are ultimately landscape for the two MC's to display their even the most seasoned professors. For confident but never cocky demeanor on the concerned with pleasing are themselves. Phonte invention of the keytar. the uninitiated passersby, the farmhouse mic. Yet again, Little Brother has done their Despite Hopkins' missteps and an audience sums it up oh-so well on "Still Lives Through" hangout's ominous stance can be a little part to bring a healthy alternative to help from The Minstrel Show: "This shit is dope and consisting mostly of the opening bands, The intimidating - perhaps even a bit spooky. balance the hip-hop diet that currendy seems we ain~t chaingin' up / Makin' money and our Band from Planet X never missed a beat and What better way to perpetuate rumours of filled with beef, blood and other worthless maintained their zeal- it certaWy didn't stop parents aren't ashamed of us / And when I graduates slaying unsuspecting froshies than filler. Now it's up to listeners to do their part much." think about that, I can't complain as guitaristJ-Rok from assaulting a seated fan by by hosting a night full of sinister music and and simply listen. Whether it be by picking And in turn, they have garnered their share of shoving a mic in his face for some improv.haunting shrieks? up (or downloading) one of their .albums, or critical acclaim and love from hip-hop heads punk screams.

Kindly filling in the set's opening slot, last making the trip to Phoenix Concert Theatre in worldwide.

Dutch and Japanesse kids seem to Rapidly strumming guitars while kneeled minute call-ups Astronauts seem a bit out on the floor and pressing mic stands and beer "get it" more than North Americans. They eat Toronto for their March 10 show with Dilated of place with the rest of the lineup. Their Peoples, just listen. And if by some chance glasses on fret boards, the band's vigor was it up over there. politeness is evident in their pop-punk tracks, listeners don't like what they hear? Well, at .

But again, it all comes back to balance. showcased right to the last notes of their set mixing fast paced guitars and drums with their lead vocalist's unrestrained yelps about - the paltry yells from showgoers contrasting Pooh points out that when 95 per cent of the least the dudes can sleep easy knowing they material getting radio and video spins in North did their best. More importandy, they did it troublesome girlfriends - not really the best with the noise present just seconds ago. while remaining true to themselves.

America comes from the opposite end of the An eavesdropper with their ear placed on way to start a night of terror. the walls outside of the Grad House could Switching gears entirely, the Jolly Llaeasily have mistaken this haunting silence as mas' reggae-infused indie cuts called for the final deathblow for a night of horrorsome toe-tapping from the sparse audience. movie inspired violence - and they wouldn't Lighthearted and full of enthusiasm, their be too far off. set included improvisational banter and But the Grad House is frightening only insults directed towards The Band from insofar as friends with scary masks go; because Planet X, who apparently could have ended after your initial shock, the mask comes off up as a prototypical emo band (or a "pro-mo and you realize it's just one of your friends band") had it not been for the Jolly Llama's out for a few laughs. The show may have been intervention. sorely lacking in Hallowe'en costumes, but the Responding to the Jolly Llama's verbal bands at the Grad House made friends of us abuse, The Band from Planet X began the final all- right after scaring us out of our socks. set with an explosion of energy. Though Erich ,JORDAN NOAKES Von Erik's high-frequency, piercing guitars and Marky-R's jackhammer drum rolls exude an aflorendo@imprint.uwaterloo.ca Phonte and Big Pooh of Little Brother chill before their Toronto set.

Jordan Noakes

SPECIAL TO IMPRINT

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FRIDAY. FEBRUARY 17, 2006

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Arts Snop tip #3: Building your band name arsenal THE

ARTS SNOB l\Iusic, dear readers, is a monumental, immovable, ivy-covered pillar of the art snob's world as embedded into our culture as art galleries and design magazines. Excreative, endlessly complex HJ,.hU.ilC;UL to skinny ties and one music gives to the art snob the same joy heroin gives to Peter art snobs around the 'world pride themselves on listening to music that you've never heard of: "Oh, vou're not familiar with that obscu~e disco ..punk band from Brooklyn? \\j'c11, then ... I guess I really tim better than you." \X/e successful elitists are constantly searching for the unknown, the underappreciated and the underkis not always easy, with false from British magazines and a constant battle to stay ahead of that confounded O.C. shmv, but music is at least one clement of art snob culture that dOts!1 't require reading a 300-1'age book to become familiar with. Lucky k)f you, the aspiring art snob, there are plenty of resources available and plenty of bands yet to be discovered.

Any person with true art snob potential will immediately realise the importance of the Intemetin "buildingone '5 band name arsenaL" Unlike magazines, websites often allow you to actually listen to the music you're reading about. No elidst 'wants to be one of d10se posers who knows

the band's name but doesn't know what they sound like: "Oh, the Stills?

Yeah, they are a pretty deck hip-hop group." ("Deck" means "cool," fII. Use it.)

The information age has done more to bring independent music to the mainstream than any other medium, and alt-hough theInternetaUows us \X/aterloo folk to keep up to date on the latest art roc.4. bands emerging from the suburbs of London, it also means there is a lot more crappy music to sift through. There are, however, a fe\v sites that can be helpful in your quest to build musical knowledge.

A good start may be ww\\:pandora. com. The Music Genome Project created this website to link different music together so listeners could basically create their own radio station. The

... art snobs around the world pride themselves on listening to music that you've never heard ...

aspiring art snob types in the name of a band that he or she alreadv knows and likes and Pandora will find similar artists, matching everything from vocal styles to "rhythmic syncopation." This is certainly a good gateway website for musical exploration, and exposes to the art snob terms like "rhythmic syncopation." But Pandora cr;n be a little commercial at times, so you may actually have to do some work to find the truly obscure.

Far better (but also a little more advanced) than Pandora is v;ww. epitonic.com, a website offering not only a vast database of music to explore but also free, high quality mp3s to download. This is key; the art snob must fill his or her iPod with Epitonic's "cutting-edge music," so the next time someone searches through their library they \';ill be shocked and astounded bv the level of musical sophisticatio~.

Each ardst profile offers mp3s, links, a biography, suggestions for related artists and movements and is highly informative. Fill up on knowledge, o aspiring art snob, for then you too can look down your nose at people who don't know about cutting edge stuff like the California avant-pop n10vement.

The whole blog thing has also had important repercussions for underground music, for it allows art snobs everywhere to share or show off their particular tast'is, As far as free music goes, \v,\v\ldhive.com may be your best bet. This blog is run by three fellow art snobs, att.aching their personal opinions and reviews to a growing archive of free downloads.

Their write-ups are both humorous and informative: a wonderful resource for the advanced art snob.

3hive allows the visitor to search by genre, artist, and label, and the page can even be streamed through {funes.

The internet has much to offer to the aspiring music elitist, and these sites ate certainly a good start on the young art snob's search for the unheard. Most important, however, is that you actually iistm to the music.

It can be a very enjoyable experiencc. cmoffat@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

Killing takes readers on trans-American spree

Chuck Klosterman Killing Yourself To Live Scribner

Chuck Klosterman recendv released his third non-fiction n~yel, fo Lin: 85 Percell! of the finc traditio'n of his previous works, this piece is

mainly a nove! about popular North American culture, \\'ith a principal focus on American music.

Killing lotmell Iv Lite began as an article for the music magazine Spill, which Klosterman also writes for.

Eventually the work turned into a novel that fol!O\vs Klosterxnan's trans-American trip to find the truth about life by looking at the deaths of famous musicians and other infamous musical tragedies.

Loaded with over 600 of his "necessary" CDs, Klosterman begins his trip in New York City, where he visits the Chelesea hotel-- the site on which Sex Pistols' Sid Vicious alJegeclJy killed his girlfriend Nancy - and ends in Seattle, with the death of Nirvana's front man KurtCobain.

Although Klosterman sticks to his original goal of visiting the sites of rock and roll's most horrific tragedies, his writing quickly tw:ns to the story of his past loves, as well as of the women he meets on his trip, \vith the three lead women in his life becomingpromi11ent figures in the tale. He discusses ho\\' these women have influenced his life and the special meaning have to him, each in their OW11 way.

But even though he strays from the dead1 to relationships he constantly refers to music to explain himself, going so far at one point as to explain ho\v many of bs relationships reHect the chang1ng lL'1e-up of KISS. KiLling }/JllmJf !oUM:\VaS an amazing read. Klosterman's ability to weave his O'-VTI personal problems into a story about tragedy is impressive and - I wodt lie -- actually makes the reader take a look at their own messed up relationships in a new way. Many of the encounters thatoccmrecl on his 1Tip are quite memorable, especially those involving friends of the victims of the Station's notorious pyrotechnics fire in 2003. Evetyrandom event Klosterman presents in'this novel is somehowextremely relatable to the reader's OI.vrdite, '.vhich makes the story perfect for any pop culture junkie like myself All in all, Killing }rmrself b) Litle is an excellent foHow ..up to Klosterman's two previous novels, I-ar;f!,() Rock Ci(y and Sex, Dn~i!l and Com Pt1tlj', and a great easy read for anyone who appreciates the often-tragic intensity of the American mmical scene. .-~

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FRIDAY, FEBRUARY 17,2006

Sonic Snippets -Wolves, tears and lots of chaos Jeremy Fisher Let It Shine Sony

With strong guitar chords, harmonica solos, folksy lyrics and of course his unruly curly hair, Jeremy Fisher is today's Bob Dylan. His newest album, Let It Shine, is an excellent example of this. Consisting of 10 songs and one bonus track, Let It Shine is both lyrically and instrumentally strong. From the upbeat songs like "Lemon Meringue Pie" to the slower paced ballads like "Fall for Anything," Fisher's album is an excellent mix of tracks that will please everybody, just like Dylan. My only criticism is that Fisher may be looking too far back at 1960's folk artists for his inspiration. For example, in his song "On Par," Fisher sings, "It was on my mind I could drink a case of you" which automatically made me think of Joni Mitchell's classic, "Case of You" where she sings virtually the same words. Overall though, the songs are catchy and I would recommend picking up the album or at least downloading a few of his tunes (legally, of course).

-

Emma Tarswell

Justin Rutledge No Never Alone Six Shooter Records

This album's country approach to an urban setting is for anyone who's ever said "anything but country" when describing musical taste.

The studio is filled with banjos and fiddles, but Rutledge'S powerful vocals - which simultaneously whisper and growl- are always at the forefront. It's a solid debut effort, but what's truly unique is Rutledge's heartfelt songwrit-

ing about hangovers and downtown Toronto streets. Replace those faint acoustic guitar strums with distorted power chords and you've got yourself a rock album. Any way you want to look at it, this is just good music.

-

of the album is a melange of good-to-great, up-tempo pop songs and textbook twee B&S. The grand total is an album so good that it forces all non-believers to say a prayer to the man above.

-

Ian Blechschmidt

-Kirill Levin

Angelo Florendo

Various Artists The Best of Taste of Chaos

Belle & Sebastian The Life Pursuit Matador

Warcon

If you feel that you're capable of anything, Belle & Sebastian have released their latest album in order to point out that you will never write pop music as good as theirs. Announcing its arrival with a send-off to the Beach Boys, the album introduces a grand total of three contenders for the spot of best pop song ever. "White Collar Boy" is a lush call-and-response that tells a Bonnie and Clyde story with an unwilling Clyde. "Sukie in the Graveyard" sounds so much like David Bowie that I was checking the liner notes for a mention of his name. "Funny Little Frog" is quite possibly the most bittersweet song ever written about unrequited love. The rest

truly died; until that happens, good hardcore is good hardcore.

Records

This CD's a paradox-a compilation of acts appearing on the Taste of Chaos tour featuringsomeof today's best emo/hardcore bands, both ones that are established (The Used, Billy Talent, Alexisonfire) and ones that are on the cusp (The Dillinger Escape Plan, The Bled, Most Precious Blood); unfortunately, it's produced by a soft drink company (Rockstar Energy Drink). Awesome, yet corporate. Unless we're talking super-legit political rock, our generation is too cynical and worn down by corporate messaging to really care one way or another wh~re we get our music from. If Refused reunites to play on this tour, then the music has

AIDSWoH The Lowers LP Lovepump United

Hailing from Montreal and with Wolf Parade's Arlen Thomson in the studio, AIDS Wolf is a band in the same sense that a subway's clicking sways can produce rhythm - it's entirely unintentional. If CBC Radio's proposed ban on playing their songs wasn't enough of a deterrent, their random, over-distorted guitar strums and entirely absent melodies certainly are. This mishmash of sonic spasms forms the basis for Chloe Lum's high-pitched, grating vocals, which are impossibly more annoying than The Blood Brothers'. There's a very good chance you will absolutely hate this album, but that's exactly what makes it easily recommendable.

It represents so poignantly everything that is good and terrible about the art-rock scene and will either remind you of why you ignore such pretentious crap or allow you to realize how far s~lfish, tonal experiments can go. Whatever your stance may be, AIDS Wolf simply cannot be ignored.

-

Angelo Florendo

Lessons learned from the past Good Night, and G<>od luck Directed by George Clooney Warner

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Excellent research facilities in the following areas: Communications; Microwaves & Photonics; Robotics, Control & Biomedical Engineering; Power Electronics; Software Engineering; Computer Architecture Exceptional faculty at a prestigious research-intensive university: Canada Research Chair, Qu~en's Research Chair, Premier's Research Excellence Awards, Wide variety of government and industry research grants Industrial collaboration with companies such as: Nortel, IBM, Samsung, Bell Mobility, MD Robotics, Sun Microsystems, BTl Photonics

Good Night, and Good Luck features a time that few young people know, but one that easily inspires; The film is another gem of an acting role for George Clooney who has been nominated for best director and best original screenplay. The black & white film based on real events took the audience back to the 1950s, when Senator Joseph McCarthy was targeting people thought to be communists in the United States. Clooney has been displaying his social conscience lately, starring in Syriana, a film depicting the problems caused by dependence on foreign oil.

Edward Murrow, portrayed by David Strathairn, was a CBS journalist who pushed the boundaries on the corporate and political restrictions that faced his primetime news show. The movie brings the audience in to fully experience how decisions were made in the newsrooms at the time. It is a film that should be seen by anyone who cares about a cause or wants to make a difference in journalism. It

inspires to dig a little deeper and act on what you think is right.

The beginning and end of the show provides a speech by Murrow to colleagues. The plot builds to a time when Murrow targets McCarthy in a legendary event in TV history. The tone of Strathairn's voice in his depiction of this event captivated the audience in the theatre. A memorable moment occurred when Murrow responded to one of the senator's attacks by quoting Shakespeare, "Had Senator McCarthy looked just three lines earlier he would have found this: 'The fault, dear Brutus, is not in our stars but in ourselves..."'

The film presented Murrow's visioQ of the future, one where television presented an educational experience to broaden the minds of its viewers. For the most part his dream wasn't fulfilled. Good Night, and Goo, Luck was clearly produced as a commentary on today's media, but also the recent erosiofl of civil liberties.

Gooney himself doesn't expect a win an Oscat this year, but you might as well count on his modesty and see this film before his Oscar's won.

-

Darcy HigginE

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George Clooney stars as Fred Friendly, in his Oscar nominated movie.

21

FRIDAY. FEBRUARY 17, 2006

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nother ne Ites he ust FOX's attention no longer Arrested

.Arrested Detdopmen! is the funniest show you've never seen. Sadly, as of last Friday, February 10, things will probably stay that way. Arrested has kicked t..~e bucket, having aired its final four episodes on the FOX network - opposite the opening ceremonies of the Olympic games. !lot even going to make the joke about FOX having cancelled more excellent shows than most networks have ever put out because, franldy, it's just getting old at this point.

Ah, who am I kidding? It's never too late to be angry: FOX sucks.

So what madeArreJted Delieiopmen! such a gem? Why, after its cancellatio~ was I curled up, rocking back and forth on mv bed with tears streaming dovin n'1Y face and hugging my home-rnade Franklin ("George Bush doesn't care about black puppets!") puppet? Because this show was one of the few flawless series to ever have graced television screens.

I love comedv television. Most people love co~edy television.

Fiit'llds) I,'rasiel; Seillfeltf? All ,vonderful programs. But t.he thing is, in many ways almost all comedy shows are the same. )\t their core they're all sitcoms - set-up, joke, come--back.

Yes, it's great stuff when it works, I'm sure I'm not the only one to have been thirsty for something different. Something new and unique.

If a show can be both fresh and funny, there's no stopping it. Or, atleast, there should he no stopping it if TV-land worked as it should.

Aloflf! with Larrv David's HBO masterpi~ce, G"y} )otir Enthusiasm, Arresfl:d Dew!opmmt was a ne\v breed of comedy·- no laugh track, no threecamera setup and no holds barred. The show's gC1-1ius is that it's very much a live-actjon cartoon and yet it also works perfeclly 1n the real ,vorid. As much as I love animated chara(:ters, there's no way y-Ou can get the same type of comedy from aHomerSimpson as you can from

a Gob Bluth: "I think that the seal with thereHow bow-tie might be the one that I released into the sea after giving it a taste for mammal blood." I laugh just thinking about that character.

Combine simple, but brilliant, episode narration (by director/producer/former.actor Ron Howard) with celebrity cameos (Charlize Theron, Martin Short and Karl Weathers), add a dash of spoof and satire (everything from the Star Wars Kid to Saddam Hussein) and I don't care who you are, you will laugh out loud at this show; And did I mention that it also sports a razor-sharp ,v:it?

Alas, as I said in the opening paragraph, Arrested Det'eloplnent is no longer on the air. But that doesn't

I.t \vas a great concert to listen to \"ith all the musicians giving somei:hing to the performance that made c1: special.

Ho\\'ever, there were some 'ninor problems and qualms that c1eld the concert back a bit, It :lrobablv would have been benefi :ial if tile three could have plaved -me 01' t\"O original compositions.

Standards are great to perform, but Jew pieces add creativity to any 1erformance.

Also, the trio could have played ;ome of the tunes at a faster tempo. [~yen if Michael, Don and Kevin ,,'ere aiming to make a comfortable

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iversity mean that the laughs have to stop ---- there are rumors that the show may be picked up by the Showtime network and the first two seasons are available on DVD. \~'atch this show: I don't care ho\\~ Buy the DVDs, download the episodes, read the thing in script form if you haye to, but expose yourself to./lrrested DezYJloplllmt in any way that you can.

E very few years TV-land gives birth to a genre-defining series and quietly secrets it off to a corner where the only thing anybody hears from it is its dying gasp. Ever hear of Firefly? Freaks alld Geeks? I'm sure you've heard of Hl1Jfii), Cty. It's always been my pleasure to introduce people to these forgotten gems. Add Arrested Det·eiop1J1Cllt to the list. It']l go down in TV history as one of the greats - mark my words.

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Jazz: simple, satisfying sounds Continued from cover

SUPER SUDOKU: LETTERS ATHROUGH Y

concert, an increased beat would have energized the Derformance for the better.

There is one word that could describe the jazz concert at Conrad Grebel: simple. But do not mistake this for something bad. Rather, the simplicity is what made the performance very enjoyable. Simple melodies, comfortable tempos and basic instrumentation made this concert so relaxing that it probably could take all the stresses of midterm week off even an engineer's back. \\j'hether you're a fan of jazz or not, this performance would bad left you at peace and asking for more.

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One all-inclusive, fully furnished room available until April 30, 2006 at Albert and Columbia (Cardill Crescent). All utilities, laundry and internet included. $345/month, negotiable. Contact elevinson@uwaterloo. ca or (416) 832-3613.

Bridgeport Lofts - Bridgeport Road!

Regina Street, Waterloo. www.pdhco. ca. Shared accommodations, single bedroom leases in three, four and five bedroom lofts for May 1. Four month, eight month and one year leases. bridgeportlofts@rogers.com.

747-5294.

PUS UPCOMING Sunday, February 18, 2006 UpTown Watt!rloo Ice Dogs Festival from 11 a.m. to 3 p.m.; Sanctioned dog sled races at the Waterloo Park from 3 p.m. to 4 p.m., weather permitting. Free! All dogs welcome.

Located in the Regina Street parking lot. For further information, please visit www.icedogfestival.ca. or contact Patti Brooks at (519) 8851921,orilptownbia@waterloo.ca.

Sunday, February 19, 2006 FBN Multimedia presents the entire Scroll Quest Trilogy at the Breithaupt Centre. Doors open at 3:30 p.m., the show begins at 4:00 p.m.

For info www.fbnmultimedia.com.

Wednesday, February 22, 2006 Prem Rawat at UCLA Berkeley: DVD Presentations. At 4:30-5:15 pm in Grad House, of UW (seminar room upstairs) For info www.tprf. org, www.elanvital.ca Thursday, February 23, 2006 Learuing Disabilities Association of K-W is hosting a workshop on "What does the Ministry say about IEPs?" at 7:30 p.m. For reservation/ ticket info call 743-9091.

Thursday, March 2, 2006 "150 Years and Counting: Drinking Water Safetv Lessons are Learned Slowly," lecture by Dr. Steve E. Hrudey, from the University of Alberta. The lecture will explore the \Valkerton disaster to the Kashechewan reservation evacuation. The

event is free and will be held at Humanities Theatre, Uw, from 3:30 to 4:30 p.m. Along with the lecture environment scholarships will be given out. For info ext 6549.

WLU Fringe Festival hits the stage in March! Ten short plays. Three short days. One exploding whale. Maureen Forrester Recital Hall, WLU, March 2 and 3 at 7 p.m., March 4 at 2 and 7 p.m. For ticket info email laurierfringe@hotmail.com.

Questions for the Prom Queen?

Challenging definitions of rights and equality, and institutional beliefs.

Movie and Discussion. At 5pm DC 1302. Marc Hall Story Friday, March 3, 7006 The City of Kitchener is proud to invite submissions for two new public art competitions funded by the City'S innovative "% for Art Policy."

The Chandler Mowat Community Centre and Victoria Hills Community Centre as the two locations with a budget each of $13,000. For applications and guidelines contact Linda Pretty at 741-2224 or linda.pretty@ city.kitchener.on.ca.

Friday, March 10, 2006 Social events also on march 11 th and 12th. 6th Annual Rainbow Reels Festival. Free admission. For info. www.rainbowreels.org

Weekend counsellors and relief staff to work in homes for individuals with developmental challenges. Minimum eight-month commitment.

Paid positions. Send resume to Don Mader, K-W Habilitation Services, 108 Sydney Street, Kitchener, ON, N2G 3V2.

SP - 100 Forest Firefighting course, London, March 8-12 or Waterloo, March 16-20, 2006. To register, please call Wildfire Specialists Inc., 2233 Radar Road, Sutie 5, Hanmer, Ontario, P3P lRZ. Toll free 1-877381-5849. Ontario Ministry of Natural Resources accredited. No guarantee of employment.

Female model for photographic studies needed. $15 per hour, 50 hours in total. Study of Jungian concept of anima as hidden/revealed, surprise/ unexpected, object, obsession. Some elements will involve nudity, partial nudity. Preference will be given to models who express an interest in and understanding of the projects.

Contact James Morgan at 745-3602.

Now accepting resumes - Ziggy's Cycle & Sport Ltd is looking for likeminded students to join our team for the upcoming season. Full-time and part-time positions need to be filled include mechanics and sales people.

E-mail resumes to Marta at ziggys. cyc1e.sport@bellnet.ca or drop off to our store at 417 King Street, W, Kitchener.

Summer Camp Counselors on campus interviews for premier camps in Massachusetts. Positions available for talented, energetic, and fun loving students as counselors in all team sports including roller hockey and lacrosse, all individual sports such as tennis and golf, waterfront and pool activities, and specialty activities including art, dance, theatre, gymnastic, newspaper, rocketry and radio.

Great salaries, room, board, travel and US summer work visa, From

June 17 to August 12. Enjoy a great summer that promises to be unforgettable. This is a great co-op opportunity. Apply Now! For more information: \Vinadu \vww.campwin~du. com (Boys): 1-877-694-7463: Danbee www.campdanbee.com (Girls): 1800-392-3752 Interviewer will be on campus Tuesday, March 21, from 10 a.m. to 3 p.m. in the Student Life Center, Main Floor.

Website developer wanted - paid and volunteer database-driven website developers. Graphic design skills an asset. Competitive salaries for the experienced developer. Quick hire for the competent volunteers. Send resume to hr@mechatrosoft.com.

'ORSJU..

Coleman gas electric portable generator. 110 and 220 outlet, 6,250 surge, 5,000 running constant, 5 gallon gas tank, 11 hours running constant, complete with wheels. Brand new, still in box. Call 577-5620.

TUTOR

English tutoring available - trouble writing essays? Is English new to you?

Friendly UW English graduate offering tutoring and ESL services. Please call 741-0353.

' ••SUR.,'.TN. . .

Pole-Fit Flare Fitness - discover K\V's popular pole dancing fitness program! Check us out online at \V¥.w.polefit.ca for registration and program information or call (519) 342-2974.

. .RV.CD Much to do about everything - deadlines approaching, conference paper due, review of literature to update?

PhD in social sciences available to assist with research, editing, grants, marking. By quotation or hourly rate. jcolwell@golden.net,

ULLETIN

ANNOUNCEMENTS Win up to $1,000 for your writing. Students in third!fourth' years qualify for STC's Heidi Thiessen Memorial Award for Student Technical Writing. Visit www.stc-soc.org/ awardslstudent.php for details and an application.

FBN is happy to announce that last year's production,"Into The Badlands" has been submitted to the London, English SciFi festival and the Winnipeg film festival. It is through the dedicated efforts of all the FBN Multimedia actors and crew that these productions happen.

It is with your support that we have the incentive to continue to produce new and original works in the K-W region.

MHATES is an on-campus group, St. Jerome's Community Contributions Committee, raising awareness of mental health issues. Visit the SLC displays during February to get all the facts. For more info contact Sarah at 725-8032 or noonanburg@ gmail.com.

Tell us what you think - "National Survey of Student Engagement" beginning February 6, all first year and graduating undergraduates will receive an e-mail survey asking for input about their UW experience.

For info call ext 3989 or email nsse@ uwaterloo.ca.

The Walrus magazine is coming to a university or college near you. The . magazine is sponsoring "The Stu-

dent Field Note Contest" with an entry deadline of March 15, 2006. For more info visit ww'w.walrusmagazine. ca.

VOLUNTEER The City of Waterloo is currently recruiting Secretary & Operations Director for Senior Summer Games Host Committee. Call 888-6488 or 888-0409, or e-mail at volunteer@ city. waterloo.on.ca.

Prueter Public School (Union/Lancaster area) needs volunteers to work in classrooms or with individual students. Call Bin Shouldice 578-0910.

K-W regions 2nd annual non-violence festival will take place in Waterloo Park on May 13,2006 in recognition with the international day of non-violence. Volunteers are needed.

Please contact www.nonviolencefestival. com for more info.

FBN Multimedia is looking for males 18-35, males 35-50, females 25-35.

The cast is ensemble style with five main characters, five supporting characters and several bit parts and extras.Also looking for a composer to score the film. Please contact: info@ fbnmultimedia.com or visit www.fbnmultimedia.com.

The YMCA is seeking dedicated volunteers for our children's global education classes. Teach children about the world around them and valuable experience by getting in-· volved today. Classes run Wednesday from 5 to 6:30 p.m. at the Kaufman Family YMCA. For more information

contact the International supervisor, Sarah, at 741-8585 or e-mail international@kwymca.org.

The LOOP is coming to K-W A city rep volunteer is needed to write about the music and cultural scene - free tickets. Check out www.theloop.ca or (519) 716-0688 for other positions.

FINANCIAL AID Friday, February 17,2006 Deadline for OSAP Reviews (appeals) for this term.

Ontario Access Grant and Millennium cheques available! Come by the Student Awards Office to claim.

Tuesday, February 28, 2006 McKegney Memorial Award; Canadian Friends of Hebrew University Award.

Wednesday, March 1, 2006 iAnywhere Silutions Inc. scholarship.

For further information, check out the Student Awards & Financial Aid Web site at: safa.uwaterloo.ca.

CHURCH SERVICE # twenty20~irections:

service starts at 7:30 p.m. every second and fourth Sunday (Feb. 12 and 26, March 12 and 26) at Koinonia Christian Fellowship, 850 Sawmill Road, Bloomingdale, ON. University pickup at UW - 6:45 p.m., SCL and WLU pickup is at 7 p.m., University Ave entrance under the walkway. For more information - www.kcf.org.

23

FRIDAY. FEBRUARY 17,2006

ience@imprint.uwaterloo.ca :ience Editor: Rob Blom :ience Assistant: Vacant

CIENCE

R BS conference t showcase scientific search ebecca McNeil IPRINT STAFF

)ne of the most beneficial attributes students and faculty about at:nding a top-rated uni,;ersity is the :>mpetitive nature of the students n campus. Continually striving to ay number one, many individuals 1d organizations on campus aim )f excellence in academia and bemd, and SCRUBS is no exception, ; they prepare for their annual )nference.

The Science Committee of Revoltionary Undergraduate Business tudents (SCRUBS) holds their anllal conference March 11, themed fhe Force: From Science free conference, all U\'\' students, pendregister ahead of time, is by the SCRUBS team, )mprised of eight core members 1d 20 volunteers, and is aimed "to tfluence the vision and enhance the assion in innovation of our young, lventive minds at the University of ,'aterloo."

The day features a networking _',sion, an industry exhibition Jmprised of several local science 1d technology companies, an in)f

teractive case study knov;n as the Innovation Challe~lge as well as exciting speakers from the scientific and business community, including: Michael Hughes (Canada's networking guru), Dave Howlett (VP corporate development of the Magens Group), Karen McPhee (director product development "nth the Guelph Food and Technology Centre) and Tom Brzustowski (former president of NSERC).

According to SCRUBS President Ryan McCartney, the conference is held as an opportunity to examine the driving forces behind the science and technology fields, beyond financial esteem. "(The conference] will focus primarily on what drives the commercialization of scientific innovations, not only in terms of dollars and cents but while also considering the passion behind making research come to life to improve the prosperity of science and technology." Hoping to solidify the importance of the practical application of scientific research, the conference should be an exciting one, as the faculty of science and business release their first magazine. This year's conference is generously spon-

sored bv BASF Canada, CBET, Merck Frosst and AstraZeneca.

One other reason for the conference is to showcase the science and business program to the community\".'1th the hopes of generating an appreciation for the promotion of science and technology in the business world. Beyond monetary reasons, the conference will allow students, faculty and those within the scientific and K·\'V community to examine what truly influence's the industry. \'<'ith an ~im towards a creative and dynamic environment, the atmosphere is geared toward networking people and ideas, as well as making connections with significant industry leaders More excitinf! for some, is the dinner held aftel~O the conference, hosted bv the science and business ambassadors. Described as "casual and interactive," the assemblage will allow upper year students to interact with former grads in order to gage some understanding of career possibilities and the workplaceenvironment, as ,veil as develop relationships with alumni.

Though the organizers are proud of their 11neup and enthusiastically anticipating the event, the c011fer-

rthan speedin brick

he best teams stop directly after the finish line to showcase their braking system.

Uchael L Davenport lPRINT STAFF

- most people were to imagine "concrete toboggan race," they ould probably picture a cinder block lrown down a hill that wouldn't go cry fast.

Yet, true to their reputation, when 7aterloo enbFineers want to send 200 >s of concrete down a hill, it does it : break-neck speeds.

Aftet nine months of designing ld building a concrete sled, the ;'aterloo students competed against 7 other schools to see who has the )eediest sled, who can stop the fast;t and who has the most spirit.

The competition took place from ebruary 1 to February 5. The races ere held at the Gray Rock Ski Moun-lin, \\ihich is north of Montreal.

Sleds have to have a concrete base in contact with the snow, to form as the sort of "runner" for the sled. The \'Vaterloo team opted for a rounded "w" shape, somewhat resembling a boat hull, to minimize contact area and consequently friction. The concrete was cas t in a wood mold treated \\'1th epoxy; this ensured the concrete had a smooth, glasslike finish. On top of all tlus, the concrete had to have the perfect balance between end strength and pour viscosity. It took four attempts just to getthehuUright.

In the end the concrete was polished with ski wax, just to get the friction down that extra little tiny bit.

The W'atedoo team came in third overall but won the award for having the best braking system.

1\iounted onto the concrete was an aluminum frame (which doubles as

a kind of "roll cage," which has to withstand a ron at 80 km/h speeds.)

The frame wasn~t fixed; it had the ability to slide with relation to the concrete sled. A couple of car shocks (think giant springs) held the frame in piace, preventing it from sliding too far.

The team welded together .angie aluminum to form a kind of "corrugated plate," which would drop like a guillotine when the sled crossed tlle finish line. The r*e was attached to the aluminum frame, which would stop relatively quickly. The concrete - a large mass bound by Newton's laws --- wDuld \vant to keep going.

I Iowever, the inertia of the concrete frame would be dissipated by the car shocks. see CONCRETE, page 25

ANGELO

Left to right on the top: Erik fletcher, Karolina Drozd, Ryan McCartney, L-R (bottom): Shazeen Bandukwala, Ada luong, liz Gore, Rebecca Zhou, Jas Banwait, Frances Cheung. cnce is still looking for sponsors, speakers and volunteers, interested individuals or companies are welcomed to contact the organization.

The SCRUBS Conference \.vill be held in the Davis Centre Foyer / Fishbowl on March 11,2006, Check

in begins at 8:30 a.m. conference closes at 5 p.m.

To register of for more information visit the conference \•.'cbsitc at ww\v.scrubs.uwaterloo.ca. rmcneii@imprint.uwaterioo.ca

Social sequesterization

I have some friends who smoke pot.

(I'm going somewhere with this.

Trust me.)

In fact, I could divide my social sphere into t\vo groups, the pot-smok·· ing f,lfcmp and the non-pot smoking group. Year.~ ago I had an interesting idea: what jf I asked mernbers of each group, "\X'hat percentage of Llnivers.ity students do vou believe smoke marijuana?" Base~i on the things that people I expected that said to me at dle bodl groups \vouId tend to believe that most university smdents are like tbemselves and that the "other" group, teetotaller or drugf,rie, was in the minoritv.

Ever he~r of Thomas Schelling?

In Pis book Micromotives and Macrobehavior, he explains a mathematical model which ~hows how people gravitate towards_ people akin to themselves, even if they hlwe only weak: preferences toward similar people and do not discriminate against those who are different. For his work in this field, SheUingreceivetlihe 2005 Nobel Prize in Economics.

This Lheorv -would s the hypothesized ~utcome 0 eriment. Ttl connect the dots those who haven't had their coffee this morning, I believe tilat both groups would estimate more university students are· in their group, simpl)' because t.J,at group is more greatiy represented among their friends.

This is ail more than ,m amusing exercise. There are some serious implications here. And if this all seems obvious to you: congratulations and read on.

\,,'hat if 1 didn't open my colurnn 'veith an urlamusing statement about drug usc? \'\,'hatif I sriuted taikingabout politics instead? Or student invoh-ement? Or just plain political views?

People tend to build a cultural fortress around tl1emsdves and fill their social circles with friends who reinforce thei r already exisdng views.

If not views, then personality traits.

Believe you're an exception? Stop and really thirL~ about it. I know a lot of my dose friends would argue w-lth me on this one just because they're as stubborn and argumentative as I am (Irony intended).

About the serious implicadons I mentioned project thIs phenomenon across an entire Jjfetime. \X'hat if someone on Feds puJIs a Tdegdi and ends up being surrounded by politics for a good ~hun];. of his lif(:time? 1 can't speak for him ---- I've never really met the l11~Sl ---- hut vou can see the point I'm at here.

Sequestering yourself a group like yourself isn't always a conscious decision and is something that needs to be actively worked against.

Having spent the last couple of \veeks of my life inside a bubble, I know how dangerous it can be to be isolated. Sometimes you're aware you're isolated. \'{lhen I was in first year I knew I knew little of worldly ~vents. (Dav enport to first years: leave caDmus!

Read the news!) I submit is it ~uch more dangerous to be inside a bubble and not know it, to be constantly surrounded by yes-men \Vho arc,." only continuously reaffirming our religious / political / moral / cheeseloving beliefs.

I guess ""hat I'm saying is, don't shy from conflict. Make the time to your safe social haven and dehate with someone. Burst vour own bubble. mdavenport@imprint.uwaterioo.ca

24

FRIDAY, FEBRUARY 17, 200

nvironmental triumph as B.C. agreement Vi ual walking r protects Canada's last remaining rainforest

ers

Initially thought to be "half-ar

half~ human" the anklebones analvzi

Spirit Bear leads campaign to protect endangered species Rebecca McNeil IMPRINT STAfF

It isn't often that protecting the rainforest means keeping Canadian trees and territory intact. British Columbians, environmentalists and First Nations alike were excited and amazed last week as an agreement was announced to protect the world's largest remaining intact temperate coastal rainforest. The deal comes as a happy shock for those who remember a decade ago, when meetings were first taking place, ho'-\' stakeholders couldn't even agree on a place to meet, now seen embracing at the signing of the deal.

B.C. Premier Gordon sat alongside of env:ironmental leaders

and coastal communitics as well as the lurnber After a decade of con·· £liet and altercation to moye the resource-use phn along, with advocates boasting that it has the potential for usc as an international model.

Protected land amounts to 1.2 million hectares along a 400 km expanse of British Columbian coast from Alaska to Knight Inlet, along \vith another 600,000 hectares of already designated parkland. This will mean area three times the size of Prince Edwa rd Island is protected, including 100 river valleys home to the world's remaining wild salmon stocks, a B.C. export and cash crop.

The agreement is revolutionary in addressing the outdated ideas of logging as well as approaching business in general, aiming to pro-mote conservation and innovation to business strategy. As opposed to fighting industry altogether, environmentahsts raised over SLX million dollars, hoping to be matched by the government, in order to generate economic activity in the area to promote the protection of the area through activities such as ecotourism and harvesting shellfish.

This doesn't mean that loggers won't be found in the forest, though.

The agreement secures loggers the access to 4 million hectares of forest, but requires them to cut selectively, away from critical \vatersheds, spawning grounds as 'well as bear dens, Appearing to be a bad deal for the logl:,ringindustry, the plan guarantees certainty in an environmentally sen" sitive future. By cutting selectively loggers svill preserve the health of the forest for years to come and allow old growth trees to Hourish,

A IMPRINT STAFF

~

PkmJ

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The theme of the 20Cf6 Canadian International Autoshmv is "\)Je'll Take You There," suggesting that the annual event, \vhleh starts February 7 in Toronto, will be a world of excitement and wonder to the estimated 300,000 people who experience it.

Automakers use international auto shows such as this to showcase the latest technological developments being made in the automotive industry. This year's CIA is no exception, highlighting both the luxurious and the practical sides of technology to show how in every way, the latest models are quickly adapting to an ever-changing world.

Luxury brands are usually the forel'unners when it comes to dazzling potential drivers with acces·

'L<lU"S"'O'~:

Combined childcare/teaching. Must be able to teach or lead one or more toll!owinQ activities: gymnastics, tennis, swim (WSl's), sail, canoe, water ski, arts stained glass, sewing, jewelry, wood, photo), dance, music, theatre, archery, Iwild"rn,"~s trips, field sports, equestrian, climbing wall.

Workers: including openings for kitchen, laundry, housekeeping, secretaries, Irn,;>ir,te>n,"v" & grounds, and kitchen supervisor.

IN'Dn"SIl'IDh:ers only. June 18 to August 20. Attractive salary (US) plus travel allowance, Apply: Applications and photo gallery are available on our website: kippewa.com or contact us at the numbers listed below for a staff chure.

Kippewa. 926 Route 135. Monmouth, Maine 04259-6606, U.S.A. tel: 207-933-2993

I fax:

207-933-2996

I email:info@kippewa.com

rmcneil@imprint.uw8terloo.ca

ch 10 Y

Adam Gardiner

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maintaing the life of the forest and industry. An added bonus is that they no longer have to anticipate envi~ ronmentalists chaining themselves to logging equipment with the deal. already signed. \'Vhile many industry and government leaders are praised for their commitment to the project, some maintain it was the figurative "poster child" for the campaign that is the real hero. The Spirit Bear, a species \vith a rare recessive gene \vhich causes them to be snow-white, lended it's unique and rare image to the campaign, being an inhabitant of the area some insist this image helped push the campaign fo1'\'/urd. The area now protected tmder the agreement is home to black one in te.n con taining the: recessive gene, making it the world's high~st concemration of th<:: Kefmode bear.

By loggillg, t:ven in a rem.ote area, the Spirit Bear becomes susceptible to extinction. The natural ecosYstem in the area creates a large butler ~nsur­ ing t..l-jat black bears without the gene do not mix on the island that do, \Vlth loggingpotentlally opening tbs barrier up, where their genes would domixlate tlle already rare bear population.

By protecting the forested area, British Columbia has chosen to sustain and rare bear populatiol1, as well as commit to sustainable industry practict:s to be aspired to world-round.

sories and features. This year, companies from all across the industry have something tempting to offer.

Optional on the new l'vIercedes-Benz S-Class sedan is night view assist, a feature that uses infrared bulhs in the headlights and an infrared camera in the windshield to display road images up to 150 Inctres past the field of vision of normal headlights. Cadillac is counting on their magnetic ride control system to add excitement to their new XLR-V roadster. MRC uses a combination of ride sensors and suspension fluid that contains dectticallycharged panicles of iron.

Depending on the conditions deter·· mined bl - the sensors, the electric f'ield in the fluid is altered, causing the iron particles to re-align and changing instantly the stiffness of the suspension. The technology is so superior to ordinary sllspension systems that it has even been adapted for use in medical prosthetics, such as artificial joints. Lexus, mt:anwhile, is going personal with their climate control: their new LS 460 luxury sedan features sensors in the rear ~eats that read the body temperature of its occupants to determine how cabin temperature should be adjusted, One might not think of int:;:;rior fahric as anything revolutionary, but this year, .it's alJ about \yhat you sit in. jeep's Compass, a crossover SU\~ features seating made with YES Essent:ials, an.allu .. microbia! fabric that

Rob 810m

Ashley Csanady IMPRINT STAFF

Microsoft puNs out virtual wallet

Shopping online is that much safer thanks to J'vIicrosoft's new virtual wallet.

Announced Febman' 14 bv Bill Gates, the "lllfoCard" ;"rill st~re aU the users online informatjon, eliminating the need for usernames and passwords which can be targeted by cyber-thieves. 1\ficrosoft's demonstration of the new tool showcd how quickly and the virtual v:allei: can be used. A consumer easily used the card to and pay fo"r a car online using a card from the virtual wallet.

Gates unveiled the "lnfoCard" at the annual RSI\ conference saying that the industry needs to do more to protect the public from cyber crime.

The technologywilI be released later this year and will be compatible with htemetExplore 7 on \'7indows Vista, Windows XP with service pack 2 and Windows server 2001.

Bipedalism reanalyzed

Schwartz and Gebo, tv:o scientists studying the anklebones of in robust ausrralopithecines ---- one of our early human ancestors found in eastern and southern Africa Ii,ring approximately two million years ago - found remarkable evidence in tbeir bipedalism,

te

t

is odour"l'csistantandis guaranteed by its manufacturer to "remain virtually stain·· and odor· tree," Volvo has de~ veloped an entirely new synthetic for their C70 convertible, which they call the material d~)selv Vulcaflex.lll resembles leather and will be use~l with real leather and regular fabric alike, The Chrysler Akino Concept, meanwhile is looking to the em-1ron· mem, featuring recyclable materials like bamboo, in its cabi.'1.

Autom?J~ers are paying more attention than ever to gtO\villg concerns over Ll-je environment, oil supply and tl1e need to develop greener, alter~ natively powered cars. Gi'YI's Sequel concept, for example, uses hydrogen fuel cells asvieU as "hub motors" that use the force generated by braking to recharge the battery, thus improving overall fuel economy. Mazda's Senku concept similarly has solar panels on its roof thatrechargeits battery when the cal' is stopped or parked.

Fortunately though, the industry isn't just looking to a greener future in their concepts: they're making it a reality as welt Saturn, Toyota, Chey· rolet and Ford are ail introducing new hybrids for either the 2007 or 2008 ~oddyear, with Ford becoming the first company to produce hybrids in Canada at its Dab-ilk phnL Many new models feature variable valve timing, a syskm that continually alters the speed at ',x,hidJ an engine block's intake and open

showed e\1dence of human natU1 thereby making bipedalism a de nite conclusion. However, intrica structural differences from mode: humans showed our ancestral sped to be slightly knock-kneed. "Th( shin hone rides across the unklebOl and would have been angled inward said Schwartz.

Common wisdom placed biped~ ism as a stable, dominant trait on, evolved in homo sapiens. This is r longer the case as there now appea to be different ways to be bipedal.

What remains to be investigat( is the evolutionary advantages dleir seemingly inferior bipedalis development, as evidence points a single evolution rather than mal independent skeletal modificatiol through multiple hominin

Farm worker's crave McDonald Farm workers in the US don't e enough vel2et:ables A stu( showed that these predominant immigrant 1\fexican wOl'kers are; underpaid and oyelv;orked that th< cat more at fast-food resrraints whe the t()od is more affordable, but Ie nutritious. The study examines tl increase in cancer-related health b ha\~ours among the Latino populauc in both the agricultural camps ar the general population. Some reml of the study were positive, SI10",~t a decrease in smoking and drinJ.cin but a significant increase in obesil especiallv in the agricultural camp \v noted. This change was attributed' the community being assimilated irl' the American culture and being mo exposed to the fast-food culture. rblom@imprint.uwaterloo.( csanady@imprint.uwaterloQ,(

Ie and close to avoid wasting unburJ fuel. continuously variable transmi 5ions, or CVTs, arc also beginnir to replace conventional manua and automatics. A CVT essential uses a belt and nvo pulleys inste2 of gears to keep the car in the ratio of to vehide spee· is alwavs Because the at peak efficiency with a CVT~ fu economy is increased. Both ChrvsI, and Nis~an are offering CVT~ f( the first time this year.

Finally, while the automake spend most of their time settir trends, they're also to folio a few as w~ll. BM\V"s new M-Seri, allows the owner to integrate the Blackberry intu the car's addre: book, while the new Chrvslers 1m special holders for cell ph~mes. BOi the ne\v Chevrolet Aveo and Hom Fit models have auxiliary jacks in the radios for mp3 players, while TOyot2 Camry will play \~'j\:lA-format fil( as well. And optiona! on the :::-'faZ( CX,7 crossover-ute, follO'\ving in tl footsteps of scveralminivan model is a touch-screen DVD. Like tt autoshQw, these cars win "take yc there," but they're guaranteed to n~a1 the drive entertaining as well.

The autoshowis located in theMe roTorontoConvention Centre and IJ Rogers Centre (fiJrmeriy the Skydorn and runs until February 26, agardiner@imprint.uwaterloo.(

25

~RIDAY. FEBRUARY 17,2006

Light rail transit for region

-Iey people, I guess we had two veeks of non-transit issues, and I uggest we come back to our main ine. Many of you might have "ex)erienced" traveling on Route 7 via Gng Street. King Street is one of he vital arteries of the region of Waterloo transit.

But how can we upgrade it? Why 10 we upgrade? On the transit rider's :nd, they need frequent and reliable eruce, resultingin shorter headways )etween transit units. On the other land, transit agencies limited by the :ost of operators try to increase the leac.h\'3.ys. So, upgrade Route 7 for ncreasing the benefits to the users, he users being the transit riders and .uto users.

One of the methods to achieve. his objective is light rail transit.

-hat requires an upgrade from tandard transit service to longituditally separated right of way, typically alled "category b." So; how one can mplement such an upgrade to King ~treet?路There are several methods to chieve such an upgrade: a) use the ame space, b) elevate the mode or ) go underground.

Why LRT? Light rail. transit op:拢'ating on a separate right-of-way .re key components of major cities :l \\'Odd. People. have realized the mportante of' light "rail Wansit in erms of increased frequency and eliability to the users.

In order to upgrade the Grand liver Transit service to longituHnally separated right of way, he regionneeds.toconsider the mplementation part and cost of onstruction to begin with. It is .rudent to mention thatllome parts .f the Route 7 do not pertain to the luxury" of having it. In fact; the nost common denominator one hould be looking on is whether t is viable to have such system .r not.

As far as the auto traveller perpective along the King Street is oncerned, it is quite evident that f a separate right-of-way is proided on the roadway used by auto adversely impact the lsers, it novement of the auto路 users who learly don't need their right of way educed. It would eventually result :l catastrophic increase in delay and ravel time for auto users. One of the esultingimpacts would be dynamic ssigrtment of travel routes by 'auto lsers (\'7ardrop's principle of equi.brium). In plain words, you \Von't ,e travelling on King Street and will ather alter your travel route to avoid Gng Street ~d take a route that takes ~ss travel time.

So, how much is saving travel ime during your regular commuting xperience important'to you? Conider if your girlfriend called in on Talentine's Day eve for a quick date s she has to prepare for a midterm nd while you got out you realized hat you have not bought a gift for ler, since you are also preparing for nidterms and when you run to King ;treet for a quick gift you got stuck :l a traffic jam. Kinda unrealistic but : happens to me all the time! Many ,eople would like to have reduced ravel times.

will

An impact is vital to be noticed in traffic: For regional government terms of mode-shifting processes, and transit agencies, it is \1.tal to a key component of four-step notice the trade-off between the transportation plannipg process auto and the bus travellers. Clearly that justifies the trade-off. A bulk the preference should be given to of auto users ",ill shift to transit those who are travelling in the bus, modes after the implementation, necessarily dictating the ideology primarily due to' the decrease in of "maximization of transfer of travel times. There will be a shift people." Nevertheless, it is a comfrom' auto users to LRT that can plex chore and needs community eventually benefit through d~rease involvement and customer surveys in auto users. from all parties before reaching to Another key impact for Region a conclusive stage. of W'aterloo transit users can be on The benefits of upgrading to路 . the bike users. It is imperative to visuch a service are quite evident for' sualize that there will be an increa~ the bus traveller, including a gradual of bike users riding LRT. Auto users mode split, segregating the group of and people who live far from the auto users. The upgrade can greatly transit stop might take a bike to the . influence the auto users to shift to stop and make the trip. the LRT service and hence aid in For the transit passenger utilizachieving a collective goal of cleaner ing the line, it is good news. Obviand greener Waterloo. ously this allows much faster service without getting stuck in the regular. zabdy@imprint.u"'!aterJoo:ca

Concrete: UW civil engineer team grabs third place.

Continued from page ~3

Waterloo's sled performed very well. Some sleds move straight, cal?'t move at all, can't stop at the end or simply start rolling partway down' the hill.

There's much more to the team than it's technical aspects - it costs from $20,000 to $25,000 to send a team to compete. Not only does the sled itself require funding, but registration fees, travel and uniforms have to be paid for.

A small portion of the funding comes from the. barbecue sales outside Carl l'ollock Hall but these saleS do more to raise awareness than money. The vast majority of support comes from corporate sponsors, in form of both money and building materials. ''We say; 'it costs this much to make it,' but we got some

of that back from our" sponsors in terms of materials," said Haley van Porten, who headed up the fundraisingteam.

Another aspect of the competition is the technical display, where the different teams can show of photos, technical details, models and the cast0ffs of the sled production. It can be" thought of as like a science project display, but with much more class.

The technical displays are judged on style and content.

The "Great Northern Concrete Toboggan !lace" was conceived of in 1972 as Canada's version of the Concrete Canoe Race held in the United States. The purpose of the competition is to test the limits of concrete and the limits of theingenuity of our engineers. mdavenport@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

26

FRIDAY, FEBRUARY 17,2006

PORTS

sports@imprint.uwaterloo.c~

Sports Editor: Dave Klaponsk Sports Assistant: Vacam

Warriors one win closer to the prize

After blowing a 2-0 lead in the second period the Warriors fought back to take the first of the best of three series against Brock Badgers.

Ryan. Rusnak SPECIAL TO IMPRINT

T1te WaterlDD WarriDrs mens hockey team knew they were gDing to' have to play their best to' beat the Lancers Dn their hDme ice Dn Friday in WmdsDr. AlthDugh the Lancers arelastin the very cDmpetitive Far West divisiDn, a win Dn Friday would have kept their plaYDff hDpes alive.

The Lancers came DUt flying, registering 15 ShDtS Dn net in the first period. HDwever they were Dnly able to' beat WarriDrs gDalie Curtis Darling pnce.

The WarriDrs drew first blood, sCDring 39 secDnds intO' the first periDd thanks to JDrdan Brenner. WarriDr Dave PhilpDttpadded thelead five minutes later Dn the pDwer play, thanks to' a pass frDm Shane Hart and Matt Levecki.

The first period wDuld end with the WarriDrs clinging to' a Dne-gDallead.

WarriDrs fDrwardDougSpoonernotched his twelfth gDal Df the seaSDn six minutes intO' the secDnd period while Dn the pDwer play. With that pDwerplay gDal, SpDDneris tied with Kevin Hurley fDr the team lead in gDalS. WarriDr David EdgewDrth extended the WarriDrs' lead to' three with seven minutes left

In the second periDd. the WarriDrs gDt the in the secDnd periDd. The WarriDrswouldheadtDthelockerrDDm lone gDal, just after a penalty expired as three after the secDnd period with a twD-gDallead. of them flew Dff down the ice. SpoDner sent BDth gDalies were sharp in the third periDd a pass to' Della MDra, whO' took a shDt. Shane stDpping all ShDts that both teams were able Hart managed to' put the rebound away at 9:51 to' muster. '. remaining to' make it 3-1. WarriDrs Dut-shDt After having a few shaky starts DV;;r ~st Lancers again 10-9. . few weeks, WarriDrs nettninder Curtis darlirig ~''''' WindsDr gDt a big early in the third periDd to~draw within a gDal Df the WarriDrs. Matt was nDthing shDrt Df spectacular in this game.

Darling made 40 saves to' ensure the victDry Levicki restored the two-gDal lead with j\,lst fDr the WarriDrs; Dver 11 minutes left in the final period.

The Lancers needed a win Dn Saturday and The Lancers wDuld nDt go away, hDwever. a Guelph win Dver Brock in Drder to' make the They sCDred with just under six minutes left plaYDffs, neither Df which happened. in the. game to' again draw within a gDal. A cDmeback was nDt in the cards thDugh, as WarriDr Frank FaziO' opened the sCDring fDr the WarriDrs with 7:36 remaining in the the WarriDrs' Ryan MacGregDr score~ Dn first after Sean RDche WDn the face-Dff back the empty Lancers gDal with 50 secDnds left to' Sean MDir, whO' put a good shot Dn net in the game.

With this lDSS the Lancers were Dfficially himself. Picking up a rebDund, in a difficult manDeuvre FaziO' shifted from fDrehand to' eliminated from the plaYoffs, giving them backhand and roDfed it to Dpen the sCDring. plenty of time to' prepare fDr the UpCDming The Lancers evened things up Dn the power golf season.

This concludes a very successful regular playa minute later, 'apitalizing Dn a shDt frDm seasDn for the WarriDrs, 15 wins, six IDsses, and the pDint, hDwever, the WarriDrs were able to' regain the lead Dnly 51, secDnds later to' head three ties, which was good enDugh fDr secDnd intO' the first intermissiDn with a Dne-goal place in the Far West divisiDn. advantage.

This succesful seaSDn fDr the WarriDrs set

up a best Df three matchup against the Brocl Badgers. .

They tDok Dn BrDck University in the firs rDund Df the playoffs Dn Wednesday and cam路 Dut Dn tDP 4-3.

The WarriDrs started Dut sttDng in the firs periDd and brDke Dut with twO' gDalS in th frame. Della MDra sCDred the first goal witl the secDnd cDming frDm EdgewDrth. .

The secDnd periDd was a different stDt] The Baqgers really picked up the. intensity anI started to' play physical. BrDck sCDred thre unanswered gDalS. By the midway pDintDf th路 periDd, the WarriDrs no IDnger looked pDisel to' pull DUt the win.

The third periDd was again a to' tally dif .ferent stDry. The WarriDrs were nDW th team to' CD me DDut Df the gates flying add j. shDwed. FDur minutes intO' the periDd Dell MDra placed Dne passed the Dutstrechel pad Df the gDalie and netted his secDnd 0' the cDntest. Less than twO' minutes later th WarriDrs pulled ahead fur gDDd with gD~ from Matt Iannetta.

With this win the WarriDrs travel to' Brocl to' try and clDse Dut the series in game twO' DJ February 18. .

27

FRIDAY. FEBRUARY 17, 2006

Waterloo students take on the 2006 ,Winter Olympics in Torino, Italy

Tough weekend for men's basketball team Salim Eteer IMPRINT STAFF

February 11, 2006 McMaster 86, Waterloo 79 McMaster's Marauders trolled into the PAC and took on the Warriors late Monday night.

The Warriors started out strong and fast gaining the early lead, but the Marauders were not to be throttled that easily. With some effective play that led to some quick scoring, the Marauders managed to take the lead 8 minutes into the game. The Warriors did not yield, keeping the visitors on their toes. The Marauders broke away in the final minutes of the half earning themselves a 45-37 lead as they headed to the locker room.

The Warriors engaged the Marauders upfront again in the second half trying to narrow the 8 point gap, but the Marauders were as determined as the Warriors as to not give up a point. However, the Warriors finally capitalized on a strategy that they found worked for them going on a 15-5 scoring spree tying the game at 68-68 with only 5 minutes left on the clock. But alas McMaster was not to be beat - they sunk a 3 pointer and went 6/8 in free throws.

Warrior forward Michael Davis put 16 points and seven rebounds in the loss for the team.

Chris Edwards had a double-double with 15 points and 10 rebounds. The Warriors put nine players on the scoresheet with four of them in double figures.

The Warriors slipped down a notch in the OUA West standings to fourth place while the Marauders climbed the tower to sit on the throne as first place.

February 13, 2006 Guelph 65, Waterloo 63

:ROSS.4::QtiIttTlW CANADA, STUDENTLIFECEN'TAE.CQM,

tDl1iO;Cllefiindina h ....,:...,,_ UIUlU'I.lIlI. ~~ountry skiing gold medal win in the 2002 tSalltLlle:Cit1 Winter.lViriDi'HJf~~t1: an English d-sbt,e:frc:n" the University of Waterloo through [.lltielln n.":uftlAe 'H81lith.r,Jllfo1"et.rtt(j~m' right} was a kinesro1;,gy undergred at the University of Waterloo membHi~,D, die n_tiona1 women's rugby team and also competed in track and plctiJred with her bobsledding partner Helen Upperton in the picture

The Guelph Gryphons hosted the Warriors in what was one of the Warriors closest games in recent Warriors seasons. The Gryphons secured their second place standing in the OUA West while the Warriors' grasp weakened on third place and fourth place is now where the team stands.

The Warriors were led in scoring by Gerard Magennis who snatched 21 points for the Warriors for his second-best scoring night of his career. Guelph's 6'9" forward J.R. Bailey was the star of the match with 25 points and 9 rebounds.

The fourth-ranked Warriors (12-9) go up against the sixth-ranked Laurier Golden Hawks , (10-11) in their final game of the season at 3 p.m. February 18 in the PAC. With a victory, the Warriors will have secured fourth place in the standings. seteer@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

ATHLETES OF THE WEEK

t \\ Sf:J,p

OIeg (hemukhin, Swimming 0Wj. a SOC'O.rKI ylSlf Lng;l1~erin.~1 ):.1l.1dt!nt hom lOI~_ OC wd thf' Waniots. jJtOOt gatherirrg p<'!ra<!e 'hith tw~ indi"'ldu<\t bnmlc medals ill th!! 50 Iffld WO h&ckstrd:1:' al.t;ll!;I wfth h::Oitlmg q{f the w;).j'ze meda! winning 4:J50 and 4 xl0Q medley te~'S. I(I tfW' other two t:>V0f't-; {tt~ col'flptett' the six event <lUowabtei:.arupte-me路nt) .. l\k>q had ,)I; 4th 'to tlw 100 f~ and wa'j; Q-ft tl*! 4th pi'lKe 4)60 ff~ f$y. In atl tJf trw. illttividoat ~'ltot" meg surphsed trw (IS qualifying ~tan颅 "'.ltd and wm 00 t\ttem!iufJ the Natillfl.!l fhotmpi-omhh.1!l at l8'o',,1 lJ.lli\'ei~ftil. feb. 24 路2{),

Caroline Amyot, Swimming (qrotine, a fifth ytc'C11 Arts Mdnclgi>illent stuJEmt from Peth, O~tario, ~wd her !:rest WiltertOI) IJ4!:lfoIfTJanO~ 3S .. Warrior ff)f this P"'~1. wt>t>ks OUA (hampic.'l1;.hi}r.>. (awtine !>Wiili'! Hfetime bi!s.~ in the qualifyinCj heat. and th('O impl{f,fed 1!prn1 th>J5p. times in t~ ~.(p!jing fiwd.s wS5ton to flfr;sh Bl.h in both the 1.00 and I.On 1M, This Ii. a significant <tt'o)flipthhtH~I!t fUl (CHoUne who h?d neVi!r C.f)ft\~t>ted di a dub i.wllllltitf and fwly :.-tartM cQ{llpetitiYl!' swimming at lJ.!Ji ....els.it-y ttl lnitiJHy gdiu t!ad:q!ound fuJ Iit'l tlwth!Qn plirsults. In tJIt" last s.wim llW .... t of he! ooiwrsity cafe~r Cawllne show~d the rt!'Sult:::. ..f a lot r...t WQ.k i!OO dt'term-i!l""ti~禄l 3'S !.hli foc!J..,~d 00 bringing {)ut hf.-r bpst ",fft)lts.

Game 3 (If Nectisary) OVA 1/4 FInals Sunday, February 19, 2006 vs BlOCk 8adqEfs 1:30 Pt.I, UW CIf Arena ilCkets lIVaIabIe at the door ArtuIIs: $8 Seniors: $7 All Students: 56 Childten under 12 are free, No passes accepted

28

FRIDAY, FEBRUARY 17, 2006

Warriors finish off winless season David Klaponski IMPRINT STAFF

The men's varsity volleyball team hosted two tough teams at home in their last matches of the season.

Waterloo entered the PAC on Friday still hoping to win their first game of the season.

Facing off against Ryerson University, they would be in tough to scrape out a victory. The first set did not fare well for the Warriors as they dropped it 25-16. In the second set, the Warriors put up a fight but lost by six, 25-19.

In the third set the Warriors also fell short to the first placed Rams and dropped the set 2520. Waterloo lost the match and with only one more game left in their season, the odds did not look good.

On Saturday, the \'{'arriors took on the University of Toronto. In a close first set the Warriors lost 25-19. The second set brought some hope back into the Waterloo side as they pullfd out a 21-25 win. With hopes still high, the warriors took the court in the third set looking to continue their momentum.

The young team, is made up of five first year and six second year players.

Although the young team is made up of five first year and six second year players, they tried hard all season to score a regular season win, their efforts fell short of success this year. The third set was lost 25-12 and with hopes ~hattered, they also fell easilv 25-16 in the fourth.

The Toronto ~d Ryerson teams are headed for the playoffs as th~ Waterloo Warriors lick their wounds and prepare for next season.

On the season, the Warriors played 20 regular season games and lost everyone finishing the season last place with a 0-20 record.

Perhaps not the most succesful of seasons, the Warriors did have two wins in two seperate tournaments against Royal Military College and won all four of their preseason matches.

After a 2-18 record last season, this year's record does not offer much hope for the program. Perhaps in the off-season, the Warriors can muster up some new talent and work on their jumping skills and come back next season ready for a revival. Without results though, it i~ hard for any sports program to get going.

In any case, the Warriors will be out again next season and winning at least one game will definetly be an improvement. dklaponski@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

SIMONA CHERLEf

An exhausted Warrior looks on as they are out matched by the first place team from Ryerson University.

Bertuzzi defends Gretzky in smear campaign

Leave it to Todd Bertuzzi to pick a guy up when he's down.

Bertuzzi has been a virtual doormat for the hockey periphery since his altercation with Steve Moore in 2004. He's been the Webster's-worthy definition of tread-on, as hardcore hockey fans and ignorant suits alike have called Bertuzzi everything from criminal to monstrous.

So it's only fitting that Bertuzzi is the first to stand up for Wayne Gretzky.

Gretzky has endured one of the toughest weeks in his life, during the toughest three

months of his life. Just when he'd dealt with the death of his mother with Gretzky-like class, he suddenly faces allegations of a multi-million dollar gambling ring involving his wife, his assistant coach and a New Jersey crime family. So when the international media starts vilifying the embodiment of Canadian hockey, you'd better believe Todd Bertuzzi will step up. After all, he knows all about media vilification.

Gretzky led the charge to restore Bertuzzi's credibility by choosing him for the Olympic team competing in Torino this week and, evidently, Bertuzzi has not forgotten it. He's been the first to stand at Gretzky's side, citing the Great One's leadership as a necessity for his presence. All of Team Canada shares Bertuzzi's view, b\;t Bertuzzi has been the loudest. .

Just like Gretzkywas the loudest in the board room when the subject of Bertuzzi's inclusion in this team came up. By all accounts, Gretzky

made it clear that Bertuzzi was a member of Team Canada, period.

Gretzky has built his career as a player - and lately, as a coach and general manager - on sticking up for the little guy. This is the man that made a career for Dave Semenko and Marty McSorley. Thisis the man that picked Eric Lindros and Theo Fleury - and their demons - for the 2002 Olympic Team. And this is the man that chose Bertuzzi and Dany Heatley for this year's squad, despite outrage from quasihockey fans and Maclean} Magazine.

But nobody remembers those things. They don't remember the class he still relies upon, now more than ever. All they know is that his wife flIt!Y have bet on the Super Bowl, and Coyotes assistant coach Rick Tocchet flIt!Y have booked that bet. It's really quite pedestrian. But then again, so is a reputational smear campaign.

It's boggling to hear how much everyone in the media has wasted our time with Gretzky. If

I could steal Olympic media accreditation fo~ five minutes and weasel my way into a (Yr!;tzk) press conference, I could think of about sever million questions I'd wish to ask him, none of which involve a NewJersey state trooper orwirt taps. Not only is there no story to manufacture but it's a waste of a moment with Canadiar hockey immortality.

And that isn't lost on Bertuzzi, or any of the Canadian players. Theire as tired of tht circus as Gretzky is. only they have an abilit: to change the focus. For Bertuzzi, it wilt.he : thank you. For Heatley, too. For others, it wi! be an "up yours" to the throngs who call for: Gretzky distraction.

In any event, this is not a distraction. Am if they win, it will be because of Gretzky, no despite him.

And you can bet on that. amcguire@imprint.uwaterloo.cl