Imprint_2007-03-02_v29_i29

Imprint Finalist in the Ontario Community Newspaper Association Better Newspaper Award’s General Excellence category The university of Waterloo’s official student newspaper

Friday, March 2, 2007

Something keeping you up at night?

See page 10

vol 29, no 29

imprint . uwaterloo . ca

Sarah Harmer brings fight for the escarpments to Waterloo.

See page 19

Warriors defeat Western’s Mustangs to face Laurier in OUA semi-finals — page 26

Delayed decision on environmental reserve

Simona Cherler

Margaret Clark assistant editor-in-chief

On sports day in Conestoga Mall, throngs of children signed up for minor league teams — the overall numbers growing, studies say, much faster than previously predicted. Meanwhile, according to city councillor Mark Whaley, Waterloo West “cries out for a library,” among other recreational infrastructure to meet the population boom. And off Westmount Road, by Columbia Lake, a parcel of university land where corn is now grown hangs in the balance.

The connection lies in a recent Waterloo city council decision to delay accepting an addendum that, if passed, would allow for community soccer fields to be built on UW’s environmental reserve. The addendum, which targets 23 acres of the north campus reserve presently used for agricultural needs,

modifies a 2003 class environmental assessment of the region — an assessment (EA) which in turn identified improving water quality and preserving wildlife as higher priorities for enhancing the land than recreational development.

If this sounds complicated, it’s because it is. The deal also works hand-in-hand with a larger partnership between UW, the city of Waterloo, the YMCA and local library system, to develop a comprehensive set of recreational infrastructure on two parcels of university land, and which would serve the rapidly growing population of Waterloo West.

With a price tag of some 30 million, a planning time span of 18 months already, and almost 1,000 pages of relevant material for city council to sift through, the decision to delay acceptance was considered wise by all.

“I felt it was imperative that we get this deal right,” Whaley explained. “The

recent municipal election saw three incumbent members beaten by people with a pro-environment stance, so we have a new council with a heightened interest in the project. This new council is also wise enough to know they need more time to get their heads around the project. My decision to delay was out of respect for the community and all the business partners involved.”

According to Whaley, in the interest of ensuring that “all partners are celebrated and respected in the decision-making process,” the city is also going to be meeting again with all business partners, including UW, in the next few weeks.

Councillor Karen Scian added that one big challenge for the city was accommodating the need for functional green spaces and the limitations of functional boundaries. “We have to be smart, creative and think about the future,” she said, adding that in relation to UW,

“Our goal is partnership — we’re here for each other. We would be nowhere without UW, and they would be nowhere without us.”

But in regard to tackling these challenges, many feel that not enough attention has been given to alternatives. “Our priorities should be retrofitting and maintaining existing facilities and operations,” council delegate Sharon Woodley told The Waterloo Chronicle, “not building large new areas of infrastructure that require the use of more resources, especially water resources.”

UW student Amber Gebhardt, who also attended the February 19 council meeting where the addendum was discussed, added that she felt the university and city had seized upon the UW environmental reserve simply because the opportunity was there, instead of considering alternative sites for recreational development.

Waterloo Engineering

GRADUATE STUDIES think about it. www.engineering.uwaterloo.ca/graduate

Leila did.

“The process,” she said, “is all backwards. They should be looking at all their options and then making an informed decision.”

If the addendum passes, the overall estimation of the sports fields’ cost will jump from $1.8 million to $3.4 million, with the additional costs financing, among other things, environmental mitigation measures to counteract the negative effects of maintaining sports fields. (Meanwhile, the 2003 Class EA recommended restoring this land to “old field meadow” for the maintenance and diversification of existing wildlife.) These measures include a living buffer between the sports fields and waterways, but according to Gebhardt, one delegate in attendance asked how sports fields can at all provide the same measure of ecological diversity as a restored old field meadow system.

See CHALLENGES page 6

Friday, March 2, 2007

news@imprint.uwaterloo.ca News Editor: Suzanne Gardner News Assistant: Narmeen Lakhani

Campuses converge over grads

News Imprint

A taste of Asian culture

Khor Cheng Seor reporter

The trend of rising enrolment in graduate education across Canada indicates a greater emphasis on the importance of staying longer in school, beyond the common bachelor’s degree.

Hence, it was timely that the Graduate Student Association (GSA) of UW took the initiative of hosting the third Graduate Student Leadership Conference. The four-day conference drew encouraging participation from delegations of graduate student (GS) leaders from eight institutions (including UW) all over Canada.

The main topics of the conference included graduate student funding, teaching assistantship, research assistantship and the development of graduate student with regards to its quality and direction for future growth.

Paul Davenport, president of the University of Western Ontario (UWO), delivered the keynote address on the third day of the conference. He discussed the expansion and quality of graduate education within the Ontario context.

Davenport highlighted the performance of major Canadian universities according to key performance indicators (KPIs) that measure the degree completion rates and the duration taken for degree completion. UW consistently emerged on top for most of the KPIs. The conference kicked off on the evening of February 21, 2007, hosted by UW’s dean of graduate studies, Prof. Dr. Ranjana Bird. The first formal session on Thursday, February 22 began with a presentation-cum-discussion by Jeff Henry, vice-president education of the Federation of Students, on the importance of, and effective mechanisms, for undertaking advocacy by graduate student associations.

UW President David Johnston took the stage next, convincing delegates that graduate student ought to be steward of ideas to fill in the gaps for Canadian R&D innovation. Johnston stressed the need for future university research and teaching to replace retiring faculty members, the shortage of capital and managerial talent and increased partnership between the academia and industry.

This session was followed by a panel discussion on graduate student funding. Of particular significance is Pierre Bilodeau’s presentation, which stressed that contribution to high quality people training has always been an essential criterion for awarding research grants.

Next, Herb O’Heron, senior research analyst at the Association Universities and Colleges of Canada, enlightened the delegates on the factors driving the growing demand for graduate education in Canada, which include an increasingly knowledge-based economy spurred by stronger public policy focus on research and innovation.

Following Davenport’s keynote address, the conference drew to a close with a presentation

by Michael Conlon, professional officer for policy and research with the Canadian Association of University Teachers. Conlon examined pressing concerns confronting faculty members — namely the lack of funding, threats to academic freedom and conflicting definitions on the quality of postsecondary education.

In retrospect, Marek Ratajczak, president of UW GSA and the conference’s chief organizer, expressed delight with the presence of delegates from universities across Canada and the effectiveness of the sessions in sparking discussion and useful exchange of ideas. He hopes that the conference will lead to continued sharing of ideas when the delegates return to their respective institutions.

margaret clark

The UW Alliance of Asian Student Clubs hosted their annual Lunarfest this past week, with booths displaying various elements of Asian culture including tastings of curry fishballs, sugar cakes, sweet and sour pork.

Grant encourages growth of social innovation in Canada Narmeen Lakhani assistant news editor

UW received $4 million from the J.W. McConnell Family Foundation for a new Centre of Social Innovation. The project involves a five-year agreement to help increase awareness and resolution of prominent social problems in Canada.

The McConnell mission statement describes its objectives: “The Foundation is a private family foundation that funds initiatives of national significance which address challenges for Canadian society by engaging people, by building resilient communities, and by developing a strong knowledge base for the work that the foundation supports.”

The funding was awarded to UW through a process of collaborating with other interested organizations such as the Tamarack Institute for Community Engagement, Hallman Foundation, Lutherwood and the Centre for International Governance Innovation. Leaders at these local

institutions worked together to propose the project for the Waterloo community, and the McConnell foundation perceived this interaction as a sign of strength in considering its approval.

UW is one of three leaders of the Social Innovation Generation (SiG), a partnership with the J.W. McConnell Foundation in Montreal and the PLAN Institute for Caring Citizenship in Vancouver. According to the McConnell Foundation, “The aim of the SiG partnership is to facilitate broad social change in Canada.

Creating a supportive environment for social entrepreneurship will engage all three sectors, with tangible results in such areas as addressing the isolation of people with disabilities, and involving citizens in positive efforts to address climate change.”

SiG@Waterloo and the proposed Centre for Social Innovation at UW will be responsible for creating academic programs and conducting research to solve leading social problems. It will also prepare graduate students to develop

these research strategies in the field of social innovation and increase mobilization of acquired knowledge outside of UW to benefit the greater Canadian society.

David Johnston, UW president, expressed his eagerness for the project: “We pride ourselves on being a different kind of university, rooted in the very best academic traditions of the academy, but with an exceptional commitment to engagement with our community and nation… Clearly, the McConnell Foundation’s initiatives and goals fit with our devotion to improving our country and our world.”

The dean of the faculty of arts, Ken Coates, added that the social innovation project will have positive implications for his faculty at UW. He included, “We have so much to contribute and the community is anxious for our suggestions…

This partnership will help us redefine the role of social sciences and humanities scholarship for the 21st century.” nlakhani@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

news

Friday, March 2, 2007

JustinTrudeau to visit UW UW invites Trudeau to share his views on youth and the environment Suzanne Gardner news editor

Education, environment and youth advocate Justin Trudeau will be visiting the University of Waterloo on Monday, March 5 to speak about his background and experiences in this latest offering from UW’s Diversity Campaign, sponsored by the Arts Student Union (ASU) and the Student Life Office (SLO).

As the eldest son of Pierre Elliott Trudeau, the 15th prime minister of Canada, the young Trudeau has garnered a great deal of media attention since his birth. He has since gone on to become a Canadian media personality and activist, most recently hosting a rally in Ramsden Park in Toronto, and calling for Canadian participation in the Darfur crisis.

Trudeau was notably highly active in the 2006 Liberal leadership convention where he endorsed candidate Gerard

Kennedy. When Kennedy dropped off after the second ballot, Trudeau joined him in supporting former environment minister and now current leader of the Liberal party, Stephane Dion.

Following Trudeau’s high level of involvement at the Liberal convention in December, rumours began to swell regarding Trudeau’s plans to follow his father’s footsteps by entering into the world of politics. CTV.ca reported in January that sources close to Trudeau were saying that he planned to seek a seat in the traditionally-Liberal Montreal riding of Outremont, although Trudeau himself would not comment on these speculations.

However, on February 22 Trudeau announced that he planned to take on the Bloc Québécois and seek the Liberal nomination in the Montreal riding of Papineau. “They will soon discover I am not my father, for better or worse,” Trudeau told CTV News afterwards.

Courtesy UW Diversity Campaign

ASU president Kevin Royal explained why Trudeau was chosen to speak at UW: “We wanted to bring a

big name speaker [...] and we thought the themes he talks about — youth, the environment, getting involved — would be relevant to UW undergraduate students.” Royal hopes that the recent media coverage on Trudeau will help attract students into attending the event, but stresses that this is “a non-partisan talk about his experiences and getting involved.”

Trudeau’s lecture will take place at the Hagey Hall Humanities Theatre from 7:00 to 8:15 p.m. on March 5.

There will also be a question and answer period after the talk. Tickets for the event are available at the Humanities Theatre box office which is open Monday through Friday from 12:00 p.m. to 5:00 p.m. UW undergraduate students can purchase tickets for $5 and graduate students, faculty members and community members can buy them for $15. sgardner@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

FRIDAY March 2 Hot Chocolate for Charity Feds Rotaract Club will sell hot chocolate for $1 a cup. Proceeds go to the UN Refugee Agency.

10:00 a.m. to 3:00 p.m.

SLC

FRIDAY & SATURDAY March 2-3 International Development Students’ Conference Students will present on many topics such as global economic disparities and terrorism and development.

6:00 p.m. (ends 5:00 p.m. Sat) RCH

Waterloo Engineering

GRADUATE think STUDIES about it.

MONDAY March 5 WIHIR ICR Seminar Prof. Ron Baecker discusses“User Experience Research Challenges in Highly Interactive Webcasting”

Leila did.

2:30 p.m. to 3:30 p.m.

DC 1302

You don’t need an undergraduate degree in engineering to be admitted to a graduate program at Waterloo. Leila Munla did her undergraduate work in science and then decided to join Canada’s top drinking water research team. She’s doing a master’s degree in civil and environmental engineering, investigating the use of ceramic membranes to help keep contaminants out of our drinking water supply.

TUESDAY March 6

We’re committed to attracting and rewarding outstanding graduate students by providing generous financial support.

The average yearly income of our master’s students is $23,000, while our doctoral students average $31,800 a year.

And our unique inventor-owns-it policy on intellectual property ensures that our graduate students benefit from the work they do here.

It’s not too late to apply. Find out more at:

www.engineering.uwaterloo.ca/graduate

Work Effectively in Another Culture Workshop on the impact of culture and communication in the work environment.

Great for students going to work abroad and international students interested in working in Canada.

4:30 p.m. to 6:00 p.m.

TC 1208

TUESDAY— THURSDAY March 6-8 Islam Awareness Week UW Muslim Students Association presents various lectures and workshops on Islam.

10:00 a.m. to 4:00 p.m.

SLC Great Hall

WEDNESDAY & THURSDAY March 7-8

Chemical Engineering • Civil and Environmental Engineering • Management Sciences • Electrical and Computer Engineering • Mechanical and Mechatronics Engineering • Systems Design Engineering • Business, Entrepreneurship and Technology • Architecture

UW GradFest 2007 Informative session for grads. Free food and door prizes will be given out.

10:00 a.m. (ends 7:00 p.m.

Thurs) DC Lobby, 1301, 1302

news

Friday, March 2, 2007

Math student joins finalist ranks in Miss World Canada contest Chris Miller

staff reporter

Waterloo’s campus just got a lot more attractive. No, the Math and Computer building didn’t burn down — but 20year-old math and business student Yasmine Rassem has achieved a finalist position at the Miss World Canada pageant. The contest will take place this month in Toronto as part of the Miss World pageant, and the winner will go on to compete with other winners from around the globe.

“This is my first one and I applied on a whim, actually,” said Rassem. “It was really surprising because I had no expertise.” Upon learning she had been selected, she made up for her inexperience by researching the past contestants of Miss World Canada.

“It’s been a lot of preperation but I’m fortunate it’s during co-op rather than school. Work is only nine-tofive.” Much of the preparation has involved seeking out sponsorship and services for the pageant. She has also looked at how pageants have changed over the years. “I think people’s perceptions are that they’re superficial events for people to show off, but [Miss World Canada’s] motto is ‘Beauty With A Purpose’ so they really try to focus on volunteer work.”

When asked what other assets besides beauty she hopes the judges will consider, she replied, “My brain — because of course I’m a Waterloo student.” Noting that math departments are generally low on females, let alone female beauty queens, she hopes her academic side will set her apart from the other contestants: “I hope they can see that aspect of me.”

Now working with RBC Capital Markets, she is also banking on her co-op experience to help her during the interview segments. “One thing Waterloo has given me is interview skills. This is my fourth work term, and I think it’s given me a competitive advantage.” On top of the interview, she also looks forward to the evening gown competition, for the general excitement of dressing up.

courtesy Yasmine rassem

UW student Yasmine Rassem vies for the Miss World Canada title this month in Toronto as part of the Miss World pageant.

Should she win, Rassem hopes to use her fame to advocate for the Hospital for Sick Children. She had originally wanted to work there as a co-op placement and was pleased to find out that Miss World Canada has worked with Sick Kids and other children’s charities.

“It would be a good platform to get my ideas across,” she said.

Asked whether she had any messages or warnings for her fellow contestants, she politely wished them good luck and noted that while she’s pretty competitive, “it’s in a laid back kind of way.”

Fans of math are invited to vote for Miss Rassem for the People’s Choice Award on the Miss World Canada website at http://www. missworldcanada.com/contestants/2007/official/yasmine/index. htm. The delegate with the most votes receives a spot in the Top 15.

The final competition will be held at Dominion Club in Toronto on March 18, featuring 30 other contestants from around the country. cmiller@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

Sister campuses abound If a monastic order wished to expand in medieval times, they would frequently open up a brother or sister monastery someplace completely different. This method of expansion allowed an order to increase its presence in the world while ensuring that their particular system of beliefs was carried to new audiences.

Universities rose out of monastic orders in Europe and some of the vestiges of monasticism remain.

Graduates wear gowns with hoods at convocation as a concrete link between the current secular institution and the sacred past.

UW is gearing up to follow the expansion practice and open a sister campus of between 3,000 and 4,000 students in Stratford. Once again, a university that sits on a largely vacant

campus with lots of land that could be developed is shipping students elsewhere. At least this time it appears that they’ll get it right.

The Stratford campus would be for all intents and purposes a fullservice university, but without any illusions about remaining connected with UW beyond a symbolic level.

Think of it as similar to UW taking over WLU, but rather than trying to completely integrate two campuses, WLU was allowed to remain a distinct entity except for the letterhead.

UW’s other satellite campus projects have been hit and miss. The school of architecture campus in Rome has been a success. Students get a chance to explore a variety of architectural styles in an environment that Canada could never offer. The school of architecture in Cambridge, however, has been only a qualified success. As an outpost of UW, it shows the flag in an otherwise beleaguered but recovering urban environment. But, also as an outpost, the students largely remain within the walls of the building and grumble about the isolation.

FREE

The school of pharmacy in Kitchener could go the same way as Cambridge or it could go differently.

As far as I know, the Kitchener facility is very much built on the Cambridge model: a separate, but not necessarily full-service department where the majority of student services have only token representation in proportion to the campus’ size.

Which brings me to Stratford.

From preliminary press reports, it appears as if the Stratford campus will be a bona fide separate liberal arts college. With a projected population of several thousand, the university would be able to create an intimate campus experience wholly separate from the main campus. Perhaps the administration has learned from the mistakes of its previous projects.

The proposed Stratford campus will only benefit students if students at the new campus are under no illusions that they will want, or need, to visit the main campus on a regular basis. Let’s hope UW gets it right this time. nmoogksoulis@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

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news

Friday, March 2, 2007

Challenges: city council cautious about proposed sports field addendum Continued from cover

The 2003 Class EA was founded heavily upon the UW North Campus Master Plan, a guiding document forwarded by the university senate and board in 1992. A quote from the plan even heads the EA, stating that “overall the development of the North Campus will bring environmental issues to the fore and foster better links to the rest of the campus and to the surrounding community.”

But while the EA ranked “Expanding Existing Sports Fields” as “-21” on a scale of how well different management opportunities addressed top priorities for the reserve, the addendum places the development of soccer fields as a top priority unto itself. Denise McGoldrick, the city of Waterloo environmental project manager, attributes this to the changing demands of Waterloo’s growing population. “The difference between 2003 and now,” she explained, “was that the original assessment never identified possible city needs.”

Her comment is contextualized by the “Needs Assessment Study for Outside Recreational Opportunities,” which states that school soccer fields have neither the appropriate size, lighting conditions nor proper irrigation to meet the needs of interested sports groups.

Councillor Whaley questioned the timing of the study’s introduction, being presented as it was just before discussion on the EA addendum, but Prof. Paul Eagles of WATGreen has bigger questions about the changing priorities.

Specifically, he wonders how this development benefits the students of UW or broadens the university’s research opportunities.

“I asked the city to withdraw the request for soccer fields,” he said, “and replace it with something more fitting with the aims of the UW Master Plan.” Eagles went on to add that the land is already used informally by professors

in the biology, AHS and ERS faculties, and that he felt this usage was much more reasonable than taking students to off-campus sites for their research projects.

Asked how students would benefit from the deal, councillor Scian said that the new sports fields would meet the demands of the many young families in the university community.

UW vice-president Academic & Provost Amit Chakma concurred, stating that the deal “helps in building a community next to the Columbia Lake Townhouses, where there are a lot of grad students with young families.”

However, when Gebhardt asked in council as to how students would benefit from the new facilities, she was told that students would not have free access to the facilities; they would have to pay for the use of lands still ostensibly owned by the university.

In accordance to WATGreen’s official stance on the EA addendum — namely, that it does not feel the soccer field development project is the best use of the land — Eagles recently released a document analyzing the existing policy plan in regards to the objectives laid out by the UW Master Plan. His analysis highlights 21 instances in which he feels the Class EA addendum — both on paper and in process — deviates from the objectives of that document. He especially questions the lack of proper university consultation with students and staff, and also whether the sports fields really benefit the city in the long term either.

“This whole project has been badly managed; the council should have introduced a citywide demand study encompassing all possible recreational and tourism needs for the region, instead of just picking one — the soccer fields — because an opportunity to enhance their partnership with UW arose.”

michael l. davenport

Lonely reeds watch over the currently empty field on UW’s north campus.

He further references a WATGreen proposal for alternative development strategies; according to Eagles the policy — which emphasizes teaching opportunities, wildlife preservation and public education — was accepted unanimously by the biology, AHS and ERS faculties, but has since not been embraced by higher levels of the university administration.

When asked about WATGreen’s consultation concerns, Chakma said, “We can always look back and say we didn’t consult someone; we can never have enough consultation. But we have appropriate government structures in place and our senate and board were well-appraised of this issue.”

In light of last term’s student outcry over the university decision to kill the beavers by Ron Edyt Village without consulting with interested groups that could have used the problem to further engage and educate students, the matter of the UW environmental reserve presents the campus with a striking measure of déjà vu. Councillor Whaley spoke of the city council’s desire to celebrate and respect all the partnerships involved in the recreational development plan; the lingering question is whether the same can be said about UW and its own, equally diverse community membership. mclark@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

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Friday, March 2, 2007

opinion@imprint.uwaterloo.ca Opinion Editor: Anya Lomako Opinion Assistant: Brendan Pinto

Friday, March 2, 2007 — Vol. 29, No. 29

Graffiti in our clean white city

Student Life Centre, Room 1116 University of Waterloo Waterloo, Ontario N2L 3G1 P: 519.888.4048 F: 519.884.7800 imprint.uwaterloo.ca Editor-in-chief, Tim Alamenciak editor@imprint.uwaterloo.ca Advertising & Production Manager, Laurie Tigert-Dumas ads@imprint.uwaterloo.ca General Manager, Catherine Bolger cbolger@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

Editorial Staff Assistant Editor, Margaret Clark Cover Editor, Dinh Nguyen Photo Editor, Michael L. Davenport Assistant Photo Editor, Valerie Broadbent Graphics Editor, Christine Ogley Assistant Graphics Editor, Angelo Florendo Web Editor, Mohammad Jangda Assistant Web Editor, vacant Systems Administrator, Gautam Khanna Sys. Admin. Assistant, Peter Gibbs Lead Proofreader, Emma Tarswell Proofreaders Linda Kong Ting, Tim Foster, Shivaun Hoad, Adrienne Raw Production Staff Scott Houston, Angela Cheng, Alicia Boers, Duncan Ramsay, Tim Foster, Kirill Levin, Shannon Tawil, Kaitlan Huckabone

Finally – this city is cracking down on the Graffiti Epidemic. Err, well, eight appearances of Megaman.

“Waterloo businesses were busy cleaning graffiti from their buildings yesterday after a University of Waterloo student allegedly went on a spray-painting spree,” reported The Record on the front page of their February 28 local section.

Mind you, I noticed the first instance of this graffiti a week ago at the GTO on Columbia.

I got a smile out of it — Megaman brings me back to the controller-smashing NES days. He’s an icon on par with Mario.

While shopkeeps may not see it from this perspective, I encourage citizens to look past the jaded coverage The Record gives and see the potential of a little good graffiti.

Why are we so in love with bare walls? Putting up a totem of culture like Megaman improves the otherwise stained and boring view. It’s a

sign that Waterloo has some degree of culture; some sense of who we are.

Shopkeepers evidently don’t think so. The story mentioned how big of a pain in the ass cleaning it off is and the costs associated. Why bother to clean it off if it’s such an inconvenience?

The Graffiti Research Lab is approaching this question in a high-tech way. Through open-source technology and electronics, they’re instructing artists in new and inspiring ways to mark up our urban landscape. GRL’s projects steer away from typical marker or spraypaint graffiti, resorting instead to using lights and projectors to get the message out.

Megaman is destructive, but maybe a little bit of destruction is exactly what Waterloo needs.

With a fancy new crepe place and Starbucks gracing uptown, the mystique of Jane Bond and Old Goat is quickly being pushed out. Where’s the grungy, do-it-yourself art that Waterloo is so good at?

Oh, right, it’s being fined and arrested away.

Consider the Arts Snob’s January 19 column, “Bringing a global phenomenon to UW.” While he’s usually tongue-in-cheek, Moffat’s column really made a great point. Why should we immediately vilify street art?

Were I an owner of any of these businesses, I’d be delighted that someone graced my walls with Megaman. Not only is it cool and eye-

PostScript

catching, the student demographic will certainly appreciate it.

But, you know, there is something to be said for plain brick walls. Almost as appealing as wearing uniforms in high school.

Maybe Martha Stewart-protégé mayor Brenda Halloran needs to reconsider her vision of Waterloo. She should embrace the idea that people can craft beautiful and inspiring street art.

It’s ultimately up to the individual businesses to decide. What’s the harm in someone like, say, Old Goat putting up a sign: “Mark up this wall and this wall only. Be creative and artistic, or you will be fined.”

We should be punishing uninspired drivel and encouraging things that increase the aesthetic appeal of our city.

“The graffiti must be removed as soon as possible because ‘graffiti will breed,’ Brooks said. ‘Other people try to copycat or outdo what’s there.’” Said the article in The Record.

I would be excited to see this bit of graffiti breed. Would we see entire levels sketched out?

Maybe a brief appearance by Bubbleman?

Skilled graffiti adds character to the city. I applaud whoever brought back blaster-toting Megaman. Thanks for making our city that much cooler. editor@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

Graham Moogk-Soulis

Office Staff Distribution, Andrea Meyers Distribution, Amy Pfaff Sales Assistant, Kristen Miller Board of Directors board@imprint.uwaterloo.ca President, Jeff Anstett president@imprint.uwaterloo.ca Vice-president, Adam Gardiner vp@imprint.uwaterloo.ca Treasurer, Jacqueline McKoy treasurer@imprint.uwaterloo.ca Secretary, Stephen Eaton secretary@imprint.uwaterloo.ca Staff liaison, Darren Hutz staffliason@imprint.uwaterloo.ca Imprint is the official student newspaper of the University of Waterloo. It is an editorially independent newspaper published by Imprint Publications, Waterloo, a corporation without share capital. Imprint is a member of the Ontario Community Newspaper Association (OCNA). Editorial submissions may be considered for publication in any edition of Imprint.

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Next board meeting: Tuesday, March 6 at 2:30 p.m.

Changes needed to make Fed Hall work

I am writing in response to the article that was published about the Federation of Students event Mint Thursdays which was hosted at Federation Hall. Mint Thursdays was a 19 plus event and was hosted every Thursday at Fed Hall.

The Feds recently announced the end of Mint Thursdays due to lack of consistent attendance. Even with the efforts to make the event more appealing by serving green martinis and having green lighting at the event, Mint Thursdays was shut down. It was an effort to bring back business to Fed Hall, because there has been a lack of people attending Fed Hall’s events.

I think that it is no surprise that Mint Thursdays has been shut down and that Fed Hall is no longer gaining a strong attendance at its events. First of all, the newly renovated Bomber reopened in Fall 2006 and has been gaining a lot of hype.

A clear example of this was during homecoming weekend at the University of Waterloo.

A few of my friends and I, who are undergrads, went to Fed Hall because we heard it was an all

ages event. When we got there, there was about a handful of people. Realizing how sad this was, we quickly stepped right back out. We then walked back to residence and while walking past Bomber we had noticed the huge crowd waiting to get in, we would have lined up as well but it was a 19 plus event.

Secondly, the lack of publicity for Fed Hall is noticed. I only found out about Mint Thursdays through the club the Canadian Alliance of Student Associations (CASA). CASA handed out a promotion gimmick for Mint Thursdays.

It was mints with the Mint Thursday poster picture on the front.

This was part of a bonus package you would receive when you signed up to be a CASA member. I thought the promotional mints were clever, however I noticed that Mint Thursdays was a 19 plus event, which brings me to my next point.

Most of the events at Fed Hall seem to be 19 plus events. This unfortunately will bring less business to Fed Hall because the majority of students that live on campus and who are closest to the venue are first year students. Almost all first year students are under the age of 19.

I think if the Feds had open events at Fed Hall, there would be more business and a steady group of people attending the events. I understand there is the issue of underage drinking, but that problem can be solved by having wristbands or closed off sections for drinking.

Finally, the article mentions the idea that the Feds is planning on making Fed Hall a place for

concerts, tradeshows and a place for students to host parties.

Although I think this is a good idea, it probably won’t generate as much money as Fed Hall had before, and certainly not the amount of money that Bomber makes.

I think that Fed Hall will soon be shut down, unless they adjust their restrictions on undergrads and create more publicity or promotions for their events. I believe that the closing of Mint Thursdays is a foreshadowing of what is going to happen to Fed Hall. Only time can tell. ­— Elizabeth Wong

opinion

Friday, March 2, 2007

Energy companies are proving the environmentalists right

All around the GTA, gas stations were running low on fuel. Many even had to turn people away as they ran out.

This drove prices up and has screwed us consumers. If we don’t act now, the oil companies are going to take us for all we’re worth. Duping us with fake stories of “fires” and “refinement capacity reductions.” We may be stupid enough to become wholly dependent on buying gas as an essential part of our lives, but do they really think we are stupid enough to buy that supplies are low?

Oil companies have grown so large in recent time that their inner workings have become a black box of mystery. Like the U.S. government, this leaves the entire industry ripe for conspiracy theories. I like those.

They are simple, easily digestible, but more importantly, sensational.

People talk about sensationalism in a negative light, but if you look it up in the dictionary, sensational means extraordinarily good; conspicuously excellent; phenomenal. How then, is it bad to have a sensationalized story?

I had a economics geek friend of mine try to explain to me some crazy thing she called “supply and demand.” I hate when math nerds try and use big words. Sure the two of them are only six letters each, but if put them together and you get 13

or something. I don’t know because I’m not a math nerd.

She said something about how prices are determined based on the availability of a product and the size of the demographic consuming the product. For instance, when commodity markets get flooded but people continue to consume the product at the same rate, it drives down prices. Conversely, if there are commodity shortages, and still people consume at the same rate, prices of the product are driven up. This is apparently what has happened in Ontario this past week.

I call bullshit. If that were the case then it would be me as a consumer who is at fault for the price spike and shortages. If it’s a nefarious plot by the oil companies, then I am absolved of all wrongdoing. How

could it be that what a business charges for something be a result of anything the consumers do?

Oil companies are as evil as crack dealers. If it weren’t for all their sexy commercials and fancy marketing techniques, we wouldn’t have all been duped into becoming so dependent on oil. North Americans didn’t choose this lifestyle; this lifestyle was forced upon us.

The worst part about these gas spikes and shortages is that it proves those hippie environmentalists right.

All of their doom and gloom nay saying about our misuse of unrenewable resources and the negative effect it will have on future generations looks like it’s being proven right. I don’t know about you, but worse than having humanity spiral out of control into a cataclysmic energy

crisis rendering the world a wretched suffering filled with a Mad Max style of post apocalyptic life is having to put up with an environmentalist bastard’s smug look.

Why oil companies, why? Lower prices. Do it not for our sake, but to keep the doomsday soothsayers from being right. You know what would really show them? If we tripled our efforts in extracting oil, swelling reserves so that there is such a gas surplus that prices crash. Then they’ll look pretty stupid. At least for now, and the present is all we should really be worrying about.

I’m Brendan Pinto and I’m single (Because a car with no gas in it is about as sexy as cockroach with leprosy), so tell your friends.

” “ bpinto@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

Quote of the Week

Rap misinterpretation

To the editor, The article [“Dissecting the origins of Canadian hip-hop,” February 16,

2007] talks about Canada’s growth in the “hip-hop industry.” However, there is no such thing as the so called “hip-hop” industry. It’s the rap industry, and that’s it. Your writing even supports this sentiment, all you do is talk about the rap game, nothing about Canada’s (or America’s) evolution in hip hop. There is no one industry targeting b-boys, so-called “aerosol artists”(read: graffiti artists), turntablists, or emcees. There is only Corporate (North) America

marketing towards this culture, not catering towards it. Hip-hop is a culture (like many others) defined by love and self-expression. As KRSOne said, “Rap is something you do hip hop is something you live.”

Canada’s evolution in the rap game (and it’s associated commercializations) may be young, but Canada has had it’s hand in hip-hop forever. Canada’s hip hop scene is alive and well, and is on the forefront of hip hop’s evolution.

Just look at Skam (Graff Artist), Kardinal Offishall, DJ A-Trak, DJ Starting from Scratch, Saukrates, k-os (a true Canadian “hip-hopper”), and the countless stores across Canada spreading the culture without extreme levels of commercialization (GDFT, Livestock, The Bombshelter [not the crap in the SLC]). Contrary to your article, Canadian hip-hop as not had the wool pulled over its eyes for a long time. In fact, Canada’s “unique characteristics” (ie. being behind the world by a good month or two) have allowed hip hop’s true talent to shine, unlike the commercialized United States.

— Nicholas Wu

VIOLENCE, DISTURBING CONTENT, COARSE LANGUAGE

IN THEATRES MARCH 2

Don’t wait for city hall to make Waterloo Region the place you want it to be.

— Mike Harcourt, politician

The Record

A cancer’s perspective

Last summer, while working an office job that allowed me ample time to waste online, I started getting both my daily horoscope and tarot reading delivered conveniently to my inbox. Derived from not only my star sign, but the day and year of my birth, these horoscopes have

proven themselves eerily accurate in the past.

I identify with no religion — although my grandmother tried her best to get me to embrace the Anglican church — and consider myself an agnostic. So why then, even if it’s half in jest, do I — like millions of others — “waste” my time on horoscopes?

It seems absurd that the mere day of your birth could actually have a cosmic influence over your entire existence, and most horoscopes are so general that any apparent influence can be chalked up to coincidence.

Using horrible clichés like “Seize the day” and “Your soul mate could be someone right under your nose,” your average horoscope is purposefully vague so that each reader can interpret and analyze it as they please. If you live your life by a daily horoscope, then any prophetic answers it may seem to hold can be chalked up to self-fulfilling prophecy. Reading a daily horoscope in retrospect can be intriguing — even a little too coincidental — but again, I could just be self-selecting so that it only seems to have a prophetic insight when, in fact, it’s really just a jumble of ambiguous statements regarding life.

Tarot cards, fortunetellers and the various forms of astrology have been around for millennia. While their prophetic powers are debatable, their longevity is not. People have always had a fascination with knowing the future — with little or no thought to consideration of whether or not they actually want to know — the internet horoscope is just yet another incarnation of “fortune-tellers” attempting to entice gullible individuals to open their wallet in exchange for a glimpse into the future.

See COSMOS, page 9

opinion

Friday, March 2, 2007

Beating the burnout

Four to five years of being mercilessly pounded with assignments, midterms and finals can seem like an eternity.

Maintaining a grip on your fragile sanity throughout the entire university experience is a daunting, yet vital task.

If you want to graduate and still have the capacity to be a productive member of society, you must absolutely prevent yourself from burning out on schoolwork. Allow me to share with you some time-tested strategies for keeping your shit together during your time at Waterloo.

As anybody in recreation and leisure will tell you, a person’s time is divided into three categories: work, play and relaxation. As you can see, it comes down to the age-old adage: “work hard, play hard, relax hard.” The key to not burning yourself out is to minimize your work time, maintain a consistent and sufficient amount of rest time and to maximize your fun during play time.

That’s right, play time. It’s not just for pre-school anymore. So how does one go about doing this?

To minimize work time, you have a few options. You can become what most people call a “brainiac” and do all of your work really quickly or, if you choose to not do this, you can become more selective in the work you do. Before studying, you should always ask yourself “Do I need to be doing this?” I think you’ll find the answer is usually “No.” As for assignments, you can just forget about them altogether.

Assignments are one of the greatest contributors to school burnout. You’re miserable when you’re doing them and

happy when you’re not. Do I really have to spell it out?

As for play time, a good way to maximize fun is to watch a movie — but be careful. Some crazy “friends” of yours might try to get you to watch a documentary. Watching documentaries is like learning; and learning is like work; and it’s play time now, so what the fuck? Don’t even bring that workin-play’s-clothing documentary up in here — that is, unless you want to go insane and fail out of school.

Now I just know some wiseass out there thinks he’s pretty witty and is telling you that getting some “play” is a good way to maximize fun during playtime. This is plain old faulty logic. Just because it’s called “getting play” doesn’t necessarily mean that it is really playing. Depending on how you’re doing it, sexual relations can fall into any of the three categories (including work) and upset your overall work/play/relaxation (WPR) balance, so watch out.

The final piece of the puzzle is relaxation. Relaxation is usually thought of exclusively as sleeping, but it can also include procrastinating, watching TV and lying in bed in your boxers while eating Cheetos (a personal favourite).

The difference between relaxation and play is subtle but important. Relaxation differs from play in that you’re not actually having any fun. If you’re having fun while relaxing, then you’re probably not relaxing hard enough. As we have already clearly established, this can upset your WPR balance and lead to burnout.

While I do believe that avoiding school related burnout just involves using some basic common sense, there are a few subtle points that I hope I’ve addressed with sufficient clarity in this column. Good luck and happy schooling. rhuneault@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

What do you hate the most about your university education?

Is the midterm testing system effective?

Imprint wants to know your stand on these issues. Submit an editorial of approximately 500 words to opinion@ imprint.uwaterloo. ca

Cosmos: foretelling with destiny and coincidence Continuted from page 8

While most fortune tellers are probably swindlers — if you could really see the future, would you really need to charge me $50 for a palm reading?

— I can’t help but wonder if the real thing is out there.

Last week, my habitual Chapters-buddy and I were meandering through the store when a book called Sextrology caught my eye.

Expecting a raunchier version of the more generic astrology books, we started flipping through. The book, it turns out, was eerily apt.

It described the romantic attitudes and histories of both my companion and I to a tee. When reading out a

particularly intriguing passage, the book even prompted a fellow Capricorn to wander over to my friend and express her own surprise at the similarities between her life and the book’s description.

Save going into specifics, the description of my own childhood, based upon the mere fact that I’m a Cancer, was so accurate it actually made me stop and wonder, “If this fits me so perfectly, how can every other Cancer on the planet have had the same exact set of circumstances?” Maybe we were selectively reading the description, unconsciously trying to make them fit our own lives — but maybe we weren’t.

I’m not going to start paying for a horoscope any time soon, but I have struck up a new fascination with the old science of astrology. I admit that most forms of fortune telling are a crock to pray on the gullible and to pry their money from their naïve hands, but a part of me still believes that it’s not all bad. And, while the logical part of my brain screams otherwise, I still can’t deny that if I opened my daily reading and it told me to buy a lottery ticket, I probably would. Illogical, gullible and stupid as it may seem, I just can’t help but try to believe there is some sense of karmic force in the world. csanady@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

THE GRADUATE STUDENT EXPERIENCE

Look closely at

Western

Canada’s best graduate student experience Western offers access to interdisciplinary programs that allow you to pursue your areas of interest. You’ll work with, and learn from, some of the best researchers and teachers in the world. Generous funding is available and you’ll enjoy all the advantages of living in a university community that is part of a major urban centre.

A mini-conference for prospective Western graduate students Saturday, March 10, 2007 12:00 p.m. - 4:30 p.m., Great Hall This event will provide you with insight and information on what it takes to succeed in graduate school.

Apart from general information on The Society of Graduate Students, TAships, scholarships, The Faculty of Graduate Studies, The City of London and much more, there will also be specific sessions on the following topics: • Strategies for Success in and after Graduate School

• Support Services for Graduate Students

• Getting Mentored in Graduate School

• Housing Opportunities

• Financing Your Graduate Education

• The Best Graduate Student Experience (panel discussion)

For more information and to register, please visit:

www.uwo.ca/grad Learn more

www.uwo.ca/grad

Features Imprint

10

Bright eyes for a sleepy head

Tina Ironstone staff reporter

“Get to bed, you need your sleep!” Your mom would tell you when you were in grade school, and you would because she told you to do it.

You would get eight hours or more a night and feel well rested. But now, university students are lucky if they can get seven hours of sleep a night. For some students 6 a.m. is a common wake up time but for others it is a common bedtime, students have varied sleep patterns and many students are up long past 2 a.m.

Due to late hours, students sometimes have difficulty falling asleep and receive little to no sleep; fortunately, health hervices offers tons of information to help the sleepless student.

Friday, March 2, 2007

features@imprint.uwaterloo.ca Features Editor: Ellen Ewart Features Assistant: Christina Ironstone

They provide 10 helpful tips for becoming well rested and ready to face the day. It is important that students receive adequate sleep to function at full potential, and by following the suggested points, you are more likely to benefit than someone who sleeps little or scattered throughout the day.

There are 10 things to do before bed to help you get a good night sleep (Also known as good sleep hygiene). Listening to soft music before or while you doze off will ease you into sleep. By setting up a routine you can get your body to adjust to a regular bedtime and wake up time. For something more casual, reading a novel or magazine or doing some light yoga helps. Aromatherapy oils like chamomile or lavender are also effective because they promote a relaxed state. Some things that do not promote a relaxed state are drinking caffeine, eating sugary foods or having a large meal.

As well, if you are facing your clock, you are more likely to be distracted and if a great deal of time passes you may become frustrated.

Try using breathing exercises inhale for four counts and exhale for four counts. By following a more regimented routine you are more likely to not only receive enough sleep but you also will have better clarity, a sharper attention span and feel more refreshed. Sounds wonderful, no? The problem with this is that students typically have a more varied routine and it is harder to schedule sleep consistency, let alone any consistency.

Consistency in university is more of a suggestion, seeing as certain things can determine how much sleep one actually gets a night. One of those things is your social life.

Part of the university experience is interacting with your peers and having some fun but that doesn’t mean this is the only thing that alters sleeping patterns. A big contributor is schoolwork, such as an assignment due the next day, an exam or midterm.

I asked one of my friends about consistency in her sleep patterns and she answered accordingly, “Being a student it’s hard to have a consistent sleeping time. I’m usually in bed around 1:30 a.m. and I usually fall asleep by 2:00 a.m. But if I have a test or assignment due… sleeping takes a back seat.” The pressure to do well in school can lead to stress, which can prevent you from relaxing and falling asleep easily. School is a high priority for students and takes up a great deal of time, but it has been proven that those who sleep seven to nine hours a night perform better on tests and have a better retention of information over those who fall below the recommended hours.

See SLEEP, page 13

Graphic by Christine Ogley, photo by MIchael L. Davenport

Science and religion — the immortal showdown This week I set for myself the two most difficult majors I could think to compare: religious studies and chemistry. It’s not so much that these two are particularly hard to connect, but that the relationship between these two seems, on the surface, wholly oppositional.

For instance, I could easily call into play the practice of radioisotope dating, as used specifically in the case of estimating the age of fossils. Seeing as some religious groups believe the universe was created a relatively

short time ago (for Young Earth creationists, the number is 6,000 to 10,000 years), understanding the ratio between Carbon-14 and Carbon-12 in plant or animal matter, and how it can be used as an indicator of decay, would be useful for scientists seeking to disprove such arguments.

Alternately, due to the very fact that such calculations only result in estimates — science is careful not to offer absolute answers — religious groups might find Carbon-14 dating a useful illustration of the gap between reason and faith, and so use their knowledge of the process to argue all the more vehemently for their beliefs.

Other examples spring just as easily to mind. There’s the matter of non-falsifiability versus the scientific method — a no-win argument if ever there was one. Then there’s the complex balance of chemical prerequisites

needed to sustain the universe (with complexity offered as an argument for intelligent design and aesthetic balance a feature in many Asian religions). And of course, there are biochemical studies pointing to the science behind religious fervour. Whatever the concrete example I touch upon, it seems the two fields can only be combined to provide further ammunition for both sides.

In fact, as terrible as it sounds, the perfect metaphor for this dilemma seems to be the Jonestown Massacre of 1978, wherein a mixture of poisoned religious beliefs and cyanide-spiked Kool-Aid resulted in the deaths of over 900 people — men, women and children alike.

But must science and religion really be such mortal enemies?

When it comes right down to it, we all believe in something — religious or otherwise.

What I find most unfortunate about the divide

between religious studies and hard sciences like chemistry is the conflict it creates. Should an understanding of theology — that constant player in contemporary discourse — be limited to those who “keep the faith”? Should chemists be confused if their personal beliefs don’t always hold up to the scientific method?

And how about religious believers — should they refuse to test their beliefs against an age saturated with scientific debate?

As with all fields, a meeting of minds is imperative. Even if we as a society are doomed to millennia of further argument between religious beliefs and the scientific method, we should at the very least be making an effort to understand both sides of the issue — and more importantly, the very real human beings who lie behind every point of view. mclark@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

Friday, March 2, 2007

features

Fill your cart without emptying your wallet Keith McManamen reporter

With the end of the year swiftly approaching, meal plans and flex dollars are undoubtedly dwindling. Recently, leading experts determined that you need food to live. So where does a starving student turn for nourishment? Excluding the increasingly banal on-campus meal locations, which many of us have grown quite weary of, hungry individuals are left with only a few options to fuel the incredibly taxing academic learning process. And so this leaves little else to turn to but local grocery stores, most notably Sobeys, Zehrs and Farah’s. But which one?

What distinguishes the good from the bad and the ugly? The answer is not found on brightly coloured signs in uncongested parking lots, well-organized flyers, clean floors, well-oiled grocery carts or sexy cashiers. The answer is on the shelf: the product.

There are two Zehrs locations in the proximity ofUW: one at Conestoga Mall, the other at University and Lincoln Ave. It is a bit of a hike from campus, but for those with a car or bus access it could prove to be worth the distance.

The prices are generally good and consistently so. The produce and baked goods are always fresh, and the meat department is one of the best in the business. There is no shortage of selection, and the shelves are arranged so that it is easy to distinguish the expensive brands from the cheaper ones, which helps expedite the power-shopping process. There is even “parcel pickup� where if you have a large or heavy load, or if you’re lazy, you can have Zehrs staff pack your car for you free of charge — but do tip.

The Sobeys on Columbia is not too long a walk from the campus, provided you don’t have too many bags. My roommate and I used to frequently walk from UWP to Sobeys and back, so it is do-able. However, for bigger trips, there is a grocery shuttle that operates every Saturday from 12 to 3 p.m., leaving from various locations all over campus (see UW website).

Sobeys, in appearance, is everything a student dreams of in a grocery store: open 24-7, a big, glowing green sign, always sparkling clean, neatly stacked fruits and vegetables, very

orderly, organized shelves, never runs out of stock, and an LCBO right next door! There is a much wider selection of brands than its counterpart, Zehrs, all types, each of varying cost. However, Sobeys is slightly tougher on the wallet. But for consistently fresh bread, meats and vegetables, and plenty of winter warm-up available next door, some would consider it worth the price.

Though it resembles a convenience store, Farah’s Foods, the extremely deceptive exterior actually hides a small grocery as well as a deli, meat, dairy, bakery, produce and frozen foods section. However, you must be wary of what you purchase. For example, most stock is generally way over-priced compared to the other grocers; for example, canned goods, frozen foods, produce and most other products I would only pick up in a dire emergency. Another thing to be very cautious of is freshness; always be careful to double check expiry dates, as it is not uncommon for spoiled food to be overlooked at Farah’s. But don’t fret, there are some positives as well. First of all, it is a very convenient location, an easy walk from all corners of the campus, and at any hour of any day. And not all products are expensive; in fact, bread, milk and eggs are no pricier than that of Zehrs or Sobeys. And perhaps the biggest bonus is that Farah’s Foods accepts WatCard, so students can use flex dollars to pay for groceries. While it may seem expensive, it is still cheaper than a $10 lunch at any of the various on-campus eateries.

Therefore, if you are in emergency need of supplies, just picking up bread, milk and eggs (check expiries, though) or using up your flex dollars, Farah’s Foods is a safe choice. Otherwise, Zehrs, while having a slightly better value than Sobeys, still cannot boast about having a neighbouring LCBO.

11

The wonder of

WILLPOWER Paul Bryant reporter

Are you ready? I’m about to divulge absolutely everything I’ve learned in my 1,833,120 minutes as a university student. Feel the rush, ladies and gentlemen.

Studying psychology, I’ve discovered that you and I (our thoughts, wishes, dreams, feelings, experiences and personality) can be explained by electrochemical activity in the brain. (“Like, duh,� moaned the readers, decisively turning the page.)

My point is simply to illustrate that your eternal love for Curly-Sue or Buddy-What’s-His-Name is, fundamentally, a vast ocean of tiny sparks.

I’m not trying to make you feel wildly organic and insignificant — but if this is indeed your cup of deep blue tea, I invite you to peruse Daniel Wegner’s research on free will, and watch the opening sequence of the movie Contact. Although thinking of one’s dreams and desires as an incidental neuronal tangle initially backhands you like 17 shades of suck, knowing exactly how you operate can be liberating. Observe: your perception is an imperfect construction of reality, your thoughts are anything but objective, and burning down an orphanage will always seem like a milder transgression if the one holding the flamethrower is your grandmother.

See? This is the pathetic mental equipment you and I have at our disposal. But when you realize that everyone, including you, is a self-serving, narcissistic idiot victimized by circumstance, I think your ability to empathize and forgive grows. We’re all the same. Or, if you prefer, you’re a marvelous, wonderful, fantastic, unique and special person, just like the rest of us.

Of course, this puzzle-pieced selfish imperfection does not give us license to play soccer on the freeway like wild hyenas, with canisters

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of mercuric fulminate strapped to our backs.

Instead, I believe that taking responsibility for one’s actions becomes more crucial. Sure, certain faculties of yours were imprinted when you were a tiny, bald thing, but your supreme mastery of the kalimba was borne of ample plucking. And guess what, folks? The worldwide champion of kalimba playing (provided there is such a thing) will not be the child who was awesome from the get-go; it will be the individual who sucked royally in the beginning, but kept on plucking.

Therein lies our gold nugget: belief and willpower are the most important resources we have. Belief got space exploration underway, brought artificial intelligence into existence, and will someday cure cancer. Willpower gives us the strength to overcome overwhelming odds, or just hoist ourselves out of bed when the alternative is so much easier. Always remember that the most earth-shattering ideas of our time were the most deplorably stupid ideas of not-so-long-ago, and those who actualized these ideas were the ones ridiculous enough, stupid enough, moronic enough to believe in the impossible.

Obviously, this is not everything I’ve learned (that was more of an eye-grabbing opener), but rather what you might call the latent, or implicit content of education. In short, I’ve decided that the electrochemical nature of one’s love for Curly-Sue does not make it any less magical, just as a beautiful painting is much more than coloured scribbles and splotches on a canvas. We transcend our sucktitude through our actions, and those actions are fueled by a strong will and lunatic belief. If you ask me, the bravery to walk a tightrope comes not from abandoning a fear of heights, but rather convincing yourself that you can fly The moment you wrap your head around that one ‌ the world is your keychain.

You’re a marvelous, wonderful, fantastic, unique and special person, just like the rest of us.

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features

12 Locks for funds to beat breast cancer

Brendan Pinto

Amid pounding music, dozens of enthusiastic Renison residents congregated at the Bombshelter pub to show their support for the volunteers who shaved their heads in the spirit of raising money for breast cancer. Laura Gray, a 4B social development studies major pictured above, was the star of the evening. Having soothed her nerves with a few drinks before her de-locking, she wore a look somewhere between excitement and horror. A constellation of flashbulbs erupted around her as her longer-than-shoulder-length hair was shaved into oblivion. Also in attendance was Cassie Johnson 3A environment and business, who likewise shaved her head to raise money for the cause. At least 10 other fellow Renisonites dyed their hair pink, including Prof. Beverly Bell-Rowbotham who made it out that night to share a glass of wine with the students. Before the bomber event, organizers had raised over $2900.

Volunteers had promised to shave their head if they had met their $2000 target, which they clearly exceeded with ease. Not only that, over $200 was raised additionally at the door. With only 220 residents and a couple thousand registered students, raising this much money was clearly an impressive feat.

The University of Guelph is offering over 90 degree credit courses, so you can

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1. Identify the Course(s) you wish to take.

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Registration Deadline: April 27, 2007 Courses start on May 10, 2007 For further information, contact Mary Komarnitsky at: Tel: (519) 824-4120 Ext. 56050 Email:mkomarn@open.uoguelph.ca or visit us at:

www.open.uoguelph.ca

Friday, March 2, 2007

Pump for pleasure only Not too long ago, I received a question from a reader asking if masturbation does anything to increase the size of the penis or the strength and amount of ejaculation. I’m sure some of you read that last sentence with a surge of hope; I hope you weren’t sitting too near the portion of readers who just burst out laughing. But I can sort of see where this question is coming from — clearly this reader knows that there are muscles in the penis and was paying attention when I said (back in June) that the prostate and urethra have muscles that are the power behind the force of a man’s ejaculation.

But before all my male readers run off to grab their lotion and boxes of tissue, let me tell you that masturbation isn’t really going to do anything for you in terms of penis size or ejaculation power.

Although the penis has muscles, they don’t work in the same way as the muscles in, for example, your arm — where exercise increases their size.

The most important muscles in the penis are in two groups.

One group of muscles relax to let more blood into the erectile tissue. The corpus cavernosum and corpus spongiosum are two sections of spongy erectile tissue that run the length of the penis (corpus cavernosom is also found in the female clit).

The sections of corpus cavernosum extend from the pubic bone to the head of the penis and they hold about 90 per cent of the blood in your erection, increasing the length and girth of your penis. The corpus spongiosum surrounds the urethra, preventing it from being crushed during erection, and forms the glands or head of the penis.

Fun penis fact: spongiosum stays more malleable during an erection because blood drains from it more easily than the cavernosum — try squeezing an erect penis the next time you have one around, and see for yourself!

The second group of muscles involved in an erection contract to help keep the blood inside the spongy erectile tissue of the penis; one is called the ischiocavernosus muscle. This muscle also helps flex your anus and stabilizes your erection — in women it tenses the vagina; this is part of what we are working when we do kegel exercises.

There isn’t really anything in the penis that can be exercised to increase its size because penis size is determined by the inflation of the erectile tissue, not the size of the muscles.

Some people say that one can increase the size of a penis by using a penis pump to extend the spongy tissue inside, but there hasn’t been any hard evidence found yet to back this claim up. It’s likely that the pump only temporarily increases the size of the gaps in the spongy tissue, creating a vacuum that sucks more blood inside.

And tugging on your penis or hanging weights from it, trying to make it longer, is much more likely to result in you hurting yourself than seeing any increase in length. You only have one penis, so please take care of it!

As for exercising to increase the amount and power

of ejaculation; yes, I know that some male porn stars seem to have a never-ending supply of semen that they pump out like a super soaker, but male porn stars do not represent the general population; they are a select few, born with a natural talent.

The average male ejaculates only 2-6 ml of semen (which is plenty) and usually squirts it around 17 to 25 cm.

Unfortunately, you won’t be able to train your penis to produce more ejaculate or to shoot it out harder/further. As I said above, it’s the muscles in the part of the urethra where the semen gathers that do most of the work for pumping out a man’s cum; when it’s time to ejaculate, the muscles convulse to propel the semen along. It’s easy to imagine that the muscles in your urethra get a nice little work out every time you ejaculate, but, again these muscles are a little different from the muscles in your arm or leg.

The muscles involved in ejaculation (and erection) are smooth muscles which don’t function in exactly the same way as skeletal muscles (like the ones in your arms).

In skeletal muscles, the fibres are long and are arranged in bands/cylinders; they are under your voluntary control and can be exercised to increase in size. In smooth muscles, the fibres are arranged in sheets or bundles; they are involuntarily controlled and cannot be exercised to grow stronger or bigger. Think about it this way: you swallow all day every day using smooth muscles and do you notice those muscles getting bigger or stronger?

No, and it’s the same for the muscles in a penis.

But if you really wanted to try over-shooting your unsuspecting roommate the next time you’re ejaculating, try holding off for a few days. Larger volumes of ejaculate are seen after a short period of abstinence (three days should do it) and it should also travel further.

So, in conclusion, if you spent all of reading week jerking off, the only muscles that are likely to be bigger and stronger are the ones in your arm. ssparling@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

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features

Friday, March 2, 2007

Sleep: Consistency is key In Grade 12, I remember the allnighter a couple of my friends and I Sarah Burrows, a second year pulled trying to finish our assignments English major student, knows the and were we tired that next day! I importance of a good night sleep don’t think I could string together a decent line of code in my program“Seven is a pretty good number of hours [to sleep] for a university stu- ming class, and at one point I think dent and I know I need at least that I almost fell asleep on the keyboard. if I want to function properly during We were zombies — literally! This the day...” She also went on to say that is why it is important to try and get she has been able to maintain some seven hours of sleep a night and if consistency in her routine to achieve that’s not possible get as many as you can. those seven hours.

There are many symptoms that Unfortunately, for many, seven hours is not plausible if they wish come with sleep deprivation. You to have their work finished, work a are groggy, less alert, have a slower part time job and make time for their response time and weaker short-term friends. My friend Hilary mentioned memory, your immune system will how the choices she and others make weaken and simple problems become affect her sleeping schedule: “I get six more difficult to solve and you have hours of sleep because I choose to. I a shorter patience. Say you were at choose to hang out with my friends. I work and you fell asleep, you could could get more sleep but it would cut get fired for sleeping on the job. into other things… such as a social Trying to sleep as many hours as you can will prevent life.” Six hours these and other seems to be the symptoms from average for most It is quite possible occurring. students I inNow, I am in no for a night owl to terviewed. The way advocating lucky few slept get more than for the early over eight hours. bird lifestyle.

Students seemed enough required It is quite posto sacrifice sleep sible for a night for either school sleep. owl to get more or to spend than enough retime with their friends. When asked how they felt quired sleep. This is more about the about their sleeping patterns, most different sleeping patterns of univerof the people I interviewed, said sity students and how not receiving that their patterns were bad and that enough sleep is detrimental to you.

One important tip that was not there never seemed to be enough time in the day to do everything mentioned in the HS top 10 is that they wanted to accomplish. This your bed should be just for sleep; if is why sleep sometimes gets placed you start using it for many different on the backburner. For it is more things like watching TV or doing important to finish off an assign- your homework, when you do decide ment or celebrate a friend’s birthday to sleep you are not as likely to asat Molly’s instead. There is always sociate the bed with sleep and will something happening on campus, have more difficulty falling asleep.

The bed is more comfortable than especially in residence.

During first year, I got the shortest a desk and is a more desirable locaamount of sleep that I ever had in tion — why sit at an uncomfortable my life. I lived on the party floor in desk when your soft cushy bed is Rev, North D, and it was never quiet unoccupied and practically calling but it was also a lot of fun to have your name? By keeping the bed a friends around and awake at all hours sleep zone you are more likely to of the night. This suited me quite well fall asleep than if the bed was a seeing as I am more of a night owl makeshift desk. If you are looking than an early bird. Even as a child, for more in depth information, HS I was always up later than most kids has packages prepared for students my age, but it really started when I with helpful tips and information on reached high school. In high school I sleeping patterns, sleeping disorders, would be up until 12:30 a.m. or 1 a.m. and just about anything related to working on assignments or chatting sleep, just ask. with a friend down the hall (I went to a boarding school). tironstone@imprint.uwaterloo.ca Continued from page 10

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13

Pin-on support Caitlin Badger reporter

As a precursor to their final exhibition, this year’s fine arts studio specialization graduates are making and selling one-inch buttons featuring samples of their artwork.

The buttons, which go on sale March 6, serve three purposes: first, to raise money to pay for the exhibition, which will take place from March 22 to 29 at Render, the East Campus Hall art gallery on Phillip Street; second, to serve as a thank-you souvenir to everyone who donates money; and finally, to remind everyone to attend the upcoming exhibition.

Besides, they look so darned snazzy on backpacks, jackets and hats—how could you not want one?

The buttons will be on sale in the SLC for one day only on Tuesday, March 6 from 12:00 p.m. to 3:00 p.m.

Buttons are $2 each, or you can buy the whole set of 19 for $30. If you want the set, you can either order it via e-mail by contacting Andrea

Skelly, skelly.andrea@gmail.com, or by signing up at the SLC on Tuesday.

There are a limited number of buttons for sale, so act quickly and get them before the artists’ roommates and parents do!

If you’re still skeptical, you can lace up your snow boots and hike on over to East Campus Hall where you can check out the buttons on display in the front windows — walk to DC and look out behind the plaza; ECH

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Interviews on campus at University of Waterloo March 16, 2007 For all the exciting details check out

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courtesy Caitlin Badger

is the green building in the middle of the parking lot. Go on, the fresh air will do you good.

This year’s exhibition, cleverly entitled 22032007 29032007, will open with a reception from 5:30 p.m. to 8:30 p.m. on March 22 at Render Gallery. This is a great opportunity to meet the artists and show some support for the fine arts faculty, whom we so often admire from afar… Like from way across the parking lot.

Rally on a virtual campus. Enterr to win a real Mazda3.

features

14

features

Friday, March 2, 2007

The past comes alive

Interactivity in the classroom Christina Ironstone staff reporter

The picture on the left is of the modern languages laboratory in 1977. In October 1961, the university planned to build the Arts I building — later renamed Modern Languages — and it was built a year later. The lab used cassette players to help the students to practise their language skills. The lab continued to use cassette tapes — although there were equipment updates throughout the passing years the labs had not yet undergone serious renovations until the fall of 2001. This was when the university decided that the cassette players were becoming outdated and that maybe it was time for a major systems upgrade.

When this decision was made a very important fiscal question came about, who sells the best for less? After much intensive research the university decided to go with a company that was originally based in Quebec. Robotel Electronic was full of highly motivated and dynamic staff. The company was also offering something the others did not

15

— they offered computers at a third of the price. Now the labs have computers for the students to use. They contain software programs for the students to do online quizzes and activities as well as auditory exercises — that reminds me of my term in Spanish 101. We would do some silent online activities then came the ones where we had to pronounce things like me llamo tina como estas usted? (my name is Tina, how are you?)

Or practising names like Miguel y Juan or saying items impia la cocina (clean the kitchen) or lava platos (dishwaher) which was kind of scary because who wants to have the whole class hear them pronounce stuff wrong. My class for the first two classes didn’t really speak out loud.

The learning facilities are more hands-on and offer a more multimedia approach that benefits more students than the original cassette tapes.

It is clear from the 1977 photo of the language lab that renovations were a brilliant idea! cironstone@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

On page 14 of the February 9, issue of Imprint, Neal MoogkSoulis provided a historical description of the tunnel between Arts Lecture and South Campus Hall. He wrote, “The origins of the spiral [in the tunnel] are unknown ...�

Thanks to Gord Dunbar, the mystery is clarified. He writes: “As someone whose first year at UW was in 1972, as someone who prowled the tunnels as an UW Graphics, Maurice Green, 19700407 awe-struck high school student in the late sixties, and as someone who spoke to the person who painted the tunnel with that mystical spiral, I may be able to help. The painter said the spiral was two things: First, it represented the psychedelic nature of the ‘60s and came to him in a “really cool LSD trip;� second, the painter felt that the spiral was a cool tribute to the Science Fiction TV series “Time Tunnel.�

Now the history comes alive!�

UW Graphics, Maurice Green, 19770323

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Blasts from the past Modern Languages was originally called Arts I Some of the cassette players that were used in the lab were 15 years old and breaking down, which led to the idea of computers.

The idea of renovation was to get a more modern style for the outdated space.

A UW graduate of fine arts helped with the interior design of it.

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features

16

Friday, March 2, 2007

People of the world, spice up your life Spicy buffalo wings hold a beloved spot in many pub-dwellers’ stomachs. For greasy spoons, casual eateries and pubs, it is considered blasphemous to neglect the inclusion of buffalo wings on the menu. Then again, why would restauranteurs hesitate to do so? Legions of devoted fans make treks religiously to their favourite digs to indulge in such addictive pieces of meat. Arriving by

the pound(s), these divine, plump morsels are steaming, tender, juicy flesh. Buffalo wings have become synonymous with good times because they have become host to many happy gatherings. From watching a sports game in front of the television to having a large celebratory bash, you will usually find buffalo wings on a bed of lettuce alongside fresh, crunchy carrots, celery and dipping sauce on many food spreads.

My love for this simple food was rekindled when a friend told me about Morty’s and their Monday and Thursday ‘cheap wing’ nights. He wasn’t kidding about how delicious or popular they were. The restaurant was crowded with bodies and the wait for an available table was an arduous measure of patience. However we were soon rewarded for our vigilance: a bounty

of wings quickly arrived on checkered paper sheets in coloured weave baskets. Inhaling the heavy aroma of spices heightened our anticipation to sink our teeth into the meat. Fresh and flavourful, the crisp exterior gave way to the juiciness locked within. As if in a trance, the wings had us in a euphoric state and soon the sight of bare chicken bones quickly replaced the once meat-laden basket.

As beloved as these wings have become, their history is quite recent. Buffalo wings and its name came from Buffalo, New York. A local restaurant called the Anchor Bar takes credit for the creation of this food. In 1964, the owners had an idea of deep frying the wings and coating them with Frank’s Red Hot Sauce. The wings sprouted a goldmine of flavour and a large,

loyal audience. As an instant hit, buffalo wings and variations of the original recipe have been adopted into many restaurant families across nations and borders. Imagine the waste prior to this food saving idea; before these pieces used to be discarded or used for stocks in soups.

While the original wings did not include breading, this recipe does. Breading disperses the flavours more evenly and makes them less messy to eat.

I realize that deep frying anything has become infamous but before we point fingers, in actuality, very little oil is absorbed by the chicken. Ensuring that the oil is hot will sear the exterior and seal in juices, keeping out most of the fat. tli@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

Spicy Buffalo Wings

Spicy Buffalo wings

1/2 cup butter 1/2 cup hot sauce (i.e. Frank’s Red Hot Sauce) 1/4 tsp ground black pepper 1/4 tsp garlic powder 1 cup all-purpose flour 1/2 tsp paprika 1/2 tsp cayenne pepper 1/2 tsp salt 20 chicken wings Blue cheese dip (recipe follows) Celery and carrot sticks Vegetable oil, for frying

1. Heat oil, about one inch of a deep fryer, to 375 degrees, or heat a sauté pan on medium high heat. (the oil is hot enough when the sides just start to bubble).

2. Combine the butter, hot sauce, ground pepper and garlic powder in a small saucepan over low heat.

Heat until the butter is melted and the ingredients are well blended.

3. Combine the flour, paprika, cayenne pepper and salt in a small bowl.

4. If the wings are frozen, defrost and dry.

5. Put the wings into a large bowl and sprinkle the flour mixture over them, coating each wing evenly.

6. The secret to perfectly crispy wings: Put the wings in the refrigerator for 60 to 90 minutes. (this will also help the breading stick to the wings when they are being fried) 7. Put all the wings into the hot oil and fry them for 10 to 15 minutes or until some parts begin to turn dark brown. If using a sauté pan, put a few pieces in at a time.

8. Remove the wings from the oil to a paper towel to drain — don’t let them sit too long, because you want to serve the wings hot.

9. Quickly put the wings into a large bowl and add the hot sauce and stir, coating all the wings evenly.

Use a large plastic container with a lid for this part, then shake to evenly coat.

10. Serve with blue cheese dip and celery sticks on the side.

Blue Cheese dip 1/3 cup blue cheese, crumbled 1/3 cup sour cream 1 tbsp mayonnaise 1/4 tsp salt 1/2 tsp hot sauce 1/4 tsp lemon juice (optional) 1. Combine all ingredients in a small bowl.

2. Chill, covered, until ready to serve.

Tiffany Li

You don’t need a deep fryer for this recipe. use a sauté pan with sides deep enough to hold about an inch of oil.

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Enter the “CGA Ontario One-Hour Accounting Contest” for college and university students on March 23, 2007.

LINE UP ONLINE TO WIN UP TO $5,000 IN CASH.

The Certified General Accountants of Ontario (CGA Ontario) invites you to enter its new online accounting contest. First, sign up at www.cga-ontario.org/ contest and obtain a user name and password for the contest. To qualify for the competition, you must complete this task by Thursday, March 22, 2007. When you login to complete the contest you must choose between two levels of difficulty to test your accounting and financial skills. This step must be done before 3 p.m. on Friday, March 23, 2007, (the day of the contest).

The competition begins promptly at 4 p.m. (on that same day) and lasts for one hour. Eligibility is restricted to students currently enrolled at an Ontario university or college.

CHOOSE YOUR TIER OF CHALLENGE. Eligible and registered students choose between two levels of difficulty; both tiers offer cash and scholarship prizes (see below).

Remember to choose your level of difficulty carefully, because this decision could earn or cost you the win.

A REWARDING EXPERIENCE. Tier 1: Basic- and Intermediate-Level Financial Accounting Questions 1st place = $4,000 cash and a scholarship worth $5,000 towards the CGA program of professional studies.

CERTIFIED GENERAL ACCOUNTANTS OF ONTARIO CGA Ontario 416-322-6520 or 1-800-668-1454

Help Line 416-322-6520 or 1-800-242-9131

E-mail info@cga-ontario.org

Websites www.nameyourneed.org or www.cga-ontario.org

2nd place = $2,000 cash and a scholarship worth $5,000 towards the CGA program of professional studies.

3rd place = $1,000 cash and a scholarship worth $5,000 towards the CGA program of professional studies.

Tier 2: Intermediate- and Advanced-Level Financial Accounting Questions 1st place = $5,000 cash and a scholarship worth $5,000 towards the CGA program of professional studies.

2nd place = $3,000 cash and a scholarship worth $5,000 towards the CGA program of professional studies.

3rd place = $1,500 cash and a scholarship worth $5,000 towards the CGA program of professional studies.

EVEN MORE INCENTIVE TO WIN. The university or college that boasts a first-place team in either tier receives a donation of $5,000 from CGA Ontario awarded to its accounting department.

Additional information about the format of the contest and the rules and regulations is available at www.cga-ontario.org/contest.

distractions

Friday, March 2, 2007

What is the strangest place to spot an issue of Imprint?

By Dinh Nguyen

From left to right, UW students: Steve Tufts, Andrew Rizkalla, Greg FitzGerald, and Nick Dyment, reading an issue of Imprint on a beach in Cancun, Mexico.

Across

1. Waiter’s top-ups 5. Concubine’s quarters 10. Exploded 14. Poet’s obscure form of alight 15. Wagner’s specialty 16. An actor’s character 17. Italian goodbye 18. Extremely wicked 20. German port city 22. Skin injury 23. UN labour organization 24. Concluded 25. Roman Christian church 30. Prepare for winter take-off 34. Eastern end of the church 35. Fine grained soapy powder 37. Not “outer” 38. Indian equivalent of Mister 39. Oyster, for example 41. Found in mosquitos in amber?

42. Japanese kelp type 44. Brain bit 45. Golf move 46. Dog’s nose 47. Napoleon’s last battle 49. Old age symptom 51. Coffee holder 52. PM’s son, with 55 across 55. PM’s son, with 52 across 59. Among other things (2 wds) 61. Overnight hotels 62. Mid-range voice 63. Regal beasts 64. Porgy-family fish 65. Come to an end 66. Melting snow 67. Swiss thermochemist

Down

1. For measuring revolutions 2. Hipbones

“Underneath my feet as I slipped down the PAS stairs. Yikes!”

Melissa Dacosta & Alison Monteriro

“On the bus to Woodbridge, Ontario.”

Lee Skene

“Under a layer of half melted snow outside of the DC.”

“In the fetish porn rack at ‘Adult

1A arts and 2B sociology

3B fine arts

Video.’”

Rachel Collins

Shelly Steffier & Will Russell

“As a piñata.”

Erika Van Velsen & Veronica Diaz Garduno

“Covering up puke in the REV glass tunnel.”

Kaija Saarinen

4B legal studies

1B honour arts and 1B honour arts and business

4B psychology and 4B English

1B environment and resource studies

17

February 23 solutions

3. Most quiet 4. Police informer 5. Perfect 6. Simian copycat 7. Sports off 8. Large chunks of time 9. In like a lion, out like a lamb 10. Widen 11. French wolf 12. If not 13. Subjective “us” 19. Relating to the iris 21. Magnitude of sound 25. Take pleasure in 26. Cooking clothing 27. The OJ Simpson judge 28. Use a phone 29. Give permission 31. Medieval Catholic privilege 32. Musical jumble 33. Poetic muse

36. Castro’s isle 39. Grow a third arm 40. Game, ____, match 43. Transit point (2 wds) 45. Excessively proper 48. Flightless bird 50. Chased by most boys 52. Dump 53. Archaic to 54. Pound with a hammer 55. Cookie containers 56. Skin ailment 57. Tail end of the intestine 58. American mail service (acronym) 60. Baseball player Gehrig 62. To the same degree

18

Classifieds

COURSES

SP-100 Forest Firefighting course, London, March 7-11 or Waterloo, March 14-18, 2007. To register, please call Wildfire Specialists Inc., 2233 Radar Road, Suite 5, Hanmer, Ontario, P3P 1R2. Toll free: 1-877-3815849. Ontario Ministry of Natural Resources accredited. No guarantee of employment.

HOUSING

Premium three-bedroom townhouse unit in a professionally managed student complex. Perfect for students, close to UW campus. Now renting May or September 2007. Call Perry now at 519-746-1411 for all the details and to set up a showing.

Room for rent for a quiet individual in a detached home near both universities. Parking and all amenities.

Please call 519-725-5348.

Attention Cambridge School of Architecture students! Live conveniently and comfortably right across the street from school in this beautifully renovated apartment. 4, 8 and 12-month leases available with excellent signing bonuses and rental incentives! Call Perry at 519-746-1411 for more details.

Single rooms in residence available for fall term at St. Paul’s College right on campus. Apply now – all welcome.

519-885-1465, ext 212 or stpauls@ uwaterloo.ca.

A perfect four bedroom apartment to live in comfortably within a short walking distance to both campuses.

Enjoy the convenience of living in a great location close to many shopping amenities and the life of Uptown Waterloo. Call Perry now at 519-7461411 to set up a viewing today.

Five bedroom house for rent – available September. Great place, near UW – $1,725 per month. Call 905509-3284 or e-mail gord010@sympatico.ca.

Available May 1, 2007 – minimum four-month lease, very clean, 372B Churchill Crescent. Six bedroom, each room is $350-$375/month plus utilities. Free parking, laundry facilities included, two common rooms

with TV, two kitchens, wireless capability throughout house and internet jacks in every room, 15 minutes from campus. Call Andrew at 416-5270369 or e-mail andrew.chalabardo@ hotmail.com.

HELP WANTED Weekend counsellors and relief staff to work in homes for individuals with developmental challenges. Minimum eight-month commitment.

Paid positions. Send resume to Don Mader, K-W Habilitation Services, 108 Sydney Street, Kitchener, ON, N2G 3V2.

Summer job – work at the beach for Kazwear Swimwear! Full and part time management and staff positions available. Grand Bend, Port Stanley and Bayfield. Competitive wage and bonuses. Contact: resumes@kazwearswimwear.ca or visit our website www.kazwearswimwear.ca for job opportunities.

Student website designer/java programming required for small local business close to UW. Transportation can be provided. Pay negotiable with experience/site setup/ongoing maintenance. Call 519-880-1282.

Summer camp counselors on campus interviews for premier camps in Massachusetts – positions available for talented, energetic and fun loving students as counselors in all team sports including soccer and lacrosse, all individual sports such as tennis and golf, waterfront and pool activities and specialty activities including arts, dance, theatre, gymnastics, newspaper, rockertry and radio. Great salaries, room, board, travel and U.S. summer work visa. June 16 to August 11. Enjoy a great summer that promises to be unforgettable. Apply now! For more information www. campdanbee.com (girls) or 1-800392-3752 or mark@campdanbee. com. Interviewer will be on campus Wednesday, March 7 from 10 a.m. to 3 p.m. in the Student Life Centre, main floor.

Now hiring student fundraisers! $8.50/hour to start. Work on campus, flexible hours, raises every 20 shifts.

Summer Camp Jobs in the U.S.A. Lakeside Residential Girls Camp in Maine - Visas Arranged #OUNSELORS #OMBINED CHILDCARE TEACHING -UST BE ABLE TO TEACH OR LEAD ONE OR MORE

OF THE FOLLOWING ACTIVITIES GYMNASTICS TENNIS SWIM 73)´S SAIL CANOE WATER SKI ARTS INCLUDING STAINED GLASS SEWING JEWELRY WOOD PHOTO DANCE MUSIC THEATRE ARCHERY

WILDERNESS TRIPS FIELD SPORTS EQUESTRIAN CLIMBING WALL 3ERVICE 7ORKERS INCLUDING OPENINGS FOR KITCHEN LAUNDRY HOUSEKEEPING SECRETARIES

MAINTENANCE GROUNDS AND KITCHEN SUPERVISOR .ON SMOKERS ONLY *UNE TO !UGUST !TTRACTIVE SALARY 53 PLUS TRAVEL ALLOWANCE 4O !PPLY !PPLICATIONS AND PHOTO GALLERY ARE AVAILABLE ON OUR WEBSITE WWW KIPPEWA COM O R CONTACT US AT THE NUMBERS LISTED BELOW

+IPPEWA 2OUTE -ONMOUTH -AINE 5 3 !

TEL \ FAX \ EMAIL INFO KIPPEWA COM

If you are a good communicator, enthusiastic and dependable, then we want to talk to you. Please apply in person at the Office of Development in South Campus Hall. Please include a cover letter, resume, class schedule and three references.

Child care needed – responsible student with child care experience needed four afternoons per week for May and June for part-time teacher in Uptown Waterloo. Please call 519880-0451. Possibility of continuing in September.

Work outdoors! Landscaping and property maintenance company seeks staff with positive attitude and solid work ethic for spring/summer, potential to continue into fall. Call 519-578-7769 or e-mail resume to sales@acelawncare.ca.

DEATH NOTICE Meghan Reid – tragically, as the result of an accident on Friday, February 23, 2007 at the age of 19 years.

Much loved and only daughter of Cathy. Beloved granddaughter of Ian and Eleanor Reid of Sidney, BC. Meghan is much loved and will be greatly missed by her new family John Enouy, Amanda and Sarah; her “Andy Man� Andy Gallant and the Gallant family; her uncles Andrew (Angela), David, godfather Barry (Brandie) and Brian (Maria) and by many cousins.

Meghan touched many lives and will always be remembered for her beauty, warm smile and musical talent. She will be especially missed by her lifelong friend Ainsley and by her “amour de vie� Alex. Friends and family gathered at the Westboro Chapel of Tubman Funeral Homes on February 28. ‘A Service to Celebrate’ Meghan’s life was held on March 1 at Renison College, University of Waterloo. Condolences, tributes or donations may be made at www.tubmanfuneralhomes. com. “Though Meghan’s life has ended Our memories of her will live on In our hearts and minds And in the music she loved.�

FINANCIAL AID

February/March 2007 Stop by the Student Awards & Financial Aid Office to see if your OSAP grant cheques are available.

March 15 — last day to submit undergraduate bursary appeals for winter term. March 23 — last day to sign confirmation of enrollment for winter only and fall and winter terms.

March 30 — recommended submission date for OSAP rollover form to add spring term. Check out our web site for a full listing of all our scholarships and bursaries. http://safa.uwaterloo.ca.

FRIDAY, march 2, 2007

Campus Bulletin VOLUNTEER

UPCOMING

Distress Line volunteers wanted – Canadian Mental Health Association is seeking caring volunteers to provide supportive listening and crisis deescalation to callers living in Waterloo Region. Please call 519744-7645, ext 300.

Student career assistants needed for 2007-2008. Career Services is looking for students to fill two volunteer positions. Depending on the position, you will gain valuable job search, marketing and career-related skills by either promoting events and services or by helping other students in their career planning and job search. Open to regular and co-op students who are creative and possess strong interpersonal and communication skills.

Applications available in Career Services, TC 1214, or from our web page at careerservices.uwaterloo.ca.

Summer volunteer opportunities with Grand River Hospital/Cancer Centre. Information sessions will be in March, April and early May. Please call 519-749-4300, ext 2613 or e-mail volunteer@grandriverhospital.on.ca for details.

Volunteers needed – volunteer with a child at their school and help improve their self-esteem and confidence. One to three hours a week commitment. Call Canadian Mental Health at 519-744-7645, ext 229.

Volunteer Action Centre – connecting talent and community – The Arthritis Society is looking for a variety of people to assist in their signature campaign for Juvenile Arthritis. Call Wendy at 519-743-2820 ext 103 or e-mail wyates@on.arthritis.ca. Juvenile Diabetes Research Foundation is looking for volunteers in registration and end of evening tear down for their Diabetes Research Symposium.

For info call 519-745-2426 or e-mail waterloo@jdrf.ca before March 1.

Give someone the gift of friendship by visiting a senior two to three hours once a week. Call 519-742-6502 or laura@k-wfriendship.org. K-W Sexual Assault Support Centre is recruiting volunteers for Board of Directors.

Fax cover letter/resume to Mastora at volunteer@kwsasc.org or fax 519571-0522 before March 23. The Food

Friday, March 2, 2007 “Expressions of Social Justice� film festival presents “C.R.A.Z.Y.� along with ACCKWA guest speaker, 7 p.m. at Lyle S. Hallman FSW Manulife Auditorium, 120 Duke Street, W., Kitchener. Hosted by Masters of Social Work at WLU and Bachelor of Social Work, Renison College, UW. Saturday, March 3, 2007 Doon Heritage Crossroads workshop on “growing seedlings indoors�. Call 519-748-1914 for information and registration.

Monday, March 5, 2007 rare presents “The Link Between Air Quality and the Food System� from 7 to 8:30 p.m. Presented by the Waterloo Public Health, at the rare Administration Building, 1679 Blair Road, Cambridge. For info/registration call 519-650-9336, ext 122. “Expressions of Social Justice� film festival presents “Fix: The Story of an Addicted City� along with guest speaker Heather Froome from the OASW, 12 to 1:30 p.m. at Lyle S. Hallman FSW Manulife Auditorium, 120 Duke Street, W., Kitchener.

Hosted by Masters of Social Work at WLU and Bachelor of Social Work, Renison College, UW. Tuesday, March 6, 2007 “Expressions of Social Justice� film festival presents “Finding Nemo,� with guest facilitator from the Waterloo YMCA Ontario Early Years Centre, 9:30 a.m., at Main Kitchener Public Library Auditorium, 85 Queen Street, W, Kitchener. Hosted

by Masters of Social Work at WLU and Bachelor of Social Work, Renison College, UW. “Expressions of Social Justice� film festival presents “9 Months, 6 Blocks + The Bicycle: Fighting AIDS with Community Medicine,� 12 p.m., spaghetti lunch $5, at Chapel Lounge Renison College, 240 Westmount Road, N., Waterloo. Hosted

by Masters of Social Work at WLU and Bachelor of Social Work, Renison College, UW. Wednesday, March 7, 2007 “Expressions of Social Justice� film festival presents “Prom Fight: The Marc Hall Story,� with guest speaker Marc Hall at 6 p.m., at Student Life Centre, UW, 200 University Ave., W., Waterloo. Hosted by Masters of Social Work at WLU and Bachelor of Social Work, Renison College, UW. Thursday, March 8, 2007 Fine Arts Film Society presents “Four Films from Turkey� – 7 p.m.

East Campus Hall Auditorium, room 1220 – ‘toonie’ admission – today, “Lovelorn ; March 15 “Istanbul Beneath My Wings� ; March 22 “Offside� ; March 29 “Bye Bye/Gule Gule.

Friday, March 9, 2007 The GO! Music Festival takes place on March 9 and 10 in Uptown Waterloo. Over 30 live acts; five licensed venues. Details: beatgoeson.com or myspace.com/gomusicfestival.

Art exhibitions at the Waterloo Community Arts Centre, 25 Regina Street, S., Waterloo, until April 4.

Displays of Gloria Kagawa and Marilyn Batte.

7th annual Rainbow Reels Queer Film Festival celebrations until March 11. For info www.rainbowreels.org.

Thursday, March 22, 2007 orchestra@uwaterloo concert “In D� at 8 p.m. at Humanities Theatre, Hagey Hall. For tickets call 888-4908 or info at www.orchestra.uwaterloo. ca.

Wednesday, April 4, 2007 Laurier PoetryFest at Registry Theatre, 122 Frederick Street, Kitchener at 7 p.m. on April 4 and 5. Free event with charitable donation accepted.

For info call Clare at 519-884-0710 ext 2665 or www.wlupress.wlu.ca.

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Arts Imprint

Friday, March 2, 2007

arts@imprint.uwaterloo.ca Arts Editor: Ashley Csanady Arts Assistant: Andrew Abela

19

Harmer sings the Blues, with visuals Shawn Bell staff reporter

It is a familiar story: young girl spends her childhood roaming the hills and forests around her parent’s farm. She grows up and moves away to spend her years on the road. When the road gets to be too much she goes back to the farm, where nothing much has changed.

Then one day a transnational corporation applies to rezone the land around the farm. It turns out the hills can be cr ushed to make gravel.

The girl, now all grown up, has to fight for her home.

Of course, when that girl is Sarah Harmer, people take notice.

On Thursday, March 8, Sarah Harmer comes to the Princess Cinema. She’s not bringing her band. Instead, she’s bringing Escarpment Blues, a Juno-nominated documentary about Harmer’s I Love the Escarpment tour. That was a two-week hiking tour of the Niagara Escarpment in June of last year, with seven shows in the auditoriums of smalltown Ontario along the way.

“We started the tour in Tobermory,” said Harmer, “with lots o f vo c a l s, a stand-up bass, mandolin and clarinet.

Portable instruments. [The tour was] partly to see the escarpment.

It was also to raise money and start conversation about the escarpment. Our friend Andy [Reen] came too and he filmed the whole thing.”

In 2004, Nelson Aggregates applied to the McGuinty government for rezoning of 200 acres on top of Mount Nemo to be

courtesy the banff centre

used for gravel extraction. Nelson Aggregates is a partnership between Lafarge and Evans and Steeds Holdings. The company already operates a 600 acre extraction quarry on top of the escarpment. Mount Nemo is a plateau just south of Burlington that overlooks Lake Ontario. The 600 foot peak also overlooks the farm Harmer calls home.

“I grew up near Mount Nemo,” Harmer said, “and I didn’t really give it much thought, because that’s just where you live.”

The Niagara Escarpment winds for 725 kilometres through southern Ontario from Tobermory to Niagara Falls.

In 1990, UNESCO (the United Nations Educational, Scientific and Cultural Organization) named the Niagara Escarpment a World Biosphere Reserve, an internationally recognized ecosystem.

“The past few years,” Harmer continued, “I’ve gained a real appreciation for the [Niagara] Escarpment. It still has intact origninal forests, source waters, and 40 per cent of Ontario’s unique species.

Because of the topography, and that it is a shale rock face, it hasn’t had the same level of development that the rest of Ontario has gone through.”

Even so, there are 44 pits and quarries covering about 2,900 hectares within the escarpment.

See DOCUMENTARY, page 22

Ashley Csanady

Alternatives Journal is presenting Sarah Harmer’s film Escarpment Blues at Princess Cinema on March 8.

The Oscars on mute, served with a side of rye

Phil Isare

Sunday night was the Academy Awards night.

Sunday night was also me-missing-my-bus-home night.

As I sat there, in some underground bar, I missed the countless smiling facades for what?

Golf on T.V. No, whiskey.

No!

Well, yes.

But only because I missed my bus thanks to bad weather and slow feet. So, instead of splurging on the graciously priced cab ride, I decided to wait for the graveyard bus home to Waterloo.

To you, I offer my pedantic piece of journalism. An aesthetic spectacle so superficial as the Oscars is perfectly befitting of my superficial reporting style. More short story than factual article, it is perfectly pertinent to this sadly phony occasion.

Instead of waiting in the uncomfortable chairs upstairs, I was quickly lured downstairs to the sketchy bar I’ve passed and ignored

so many times. I opted for the less comfortable bar stool to sit for the next two hours where there were, after all, televisions. Maybe I’d catch the program I was supposed to report on after all!

Since my luck was beginning to get suddenly much better, I decided to chase this good feeling and provide myself with the hedonistic nectar only a bar could offer — Canadian rye.

My bad fortune delivered me an impromptu drinking occasion

with two older women and a very friendly bartender — a man who you could tell prided himself on subtle compliments and hidden passes. Out of nowhere, I found myself drawn to the comforting glow of the Oscars, the fake tans and the bright faces.

With not much else in the room to settle me down, as all televisions were sadly occupied, I promptly ordered a double whiskey to appease my nerves. Being the uninhibited social animal that I am, I quickly found myself in deep conversation with the young lady sitting beside me.

After discovering my age, the charming and beautiful commerce graduate suddenly professed how shocked she was, begging me to wonder: could my poor attempt at facial hair really be this illusory?

Then again, could Alan Arkin really steal best supporting actor from the not-so departed Marky Mark like I predicted?

I loved them both in their respective roles. She quickly assured me that it was merely a reflection of my personality, as she so kindly termed me “a well put together person.”

With such flattering and supposedly introspective compliments, I decided to indulge myself in some self-indulgent thoughts. It was an egotistic indulgence like the kind Beyonce so liberally feeds herself,

especially when she incessantly complained about how she wasn’t nominated for her role in Dreamgirls, while her colleague, Jennifer Hudson proved a popular and lovely Oscar nominee.

It put me in the perfect mood to enjoy the contrived film event that so consistently reminds me why I don’t have more respect for some actors, and why Oscars night is the obvious and unattractive pimple blemish on the pristine face that is film. ... A pristine face akin to that of Grace Kelly with a zit, as when the glorious days of Hitchcock brought me the vaseline-smothered camera lens shots of the beautiful blonde bombshell in Rear Window.

As I desperately try to think of an excuse to break the awkward gaze the barkeep has me unwittingly locked in, I remember what I was supposed to do tonight: watch the Academy Awards.

So, instead of watching some boring golf highlights, I asked th e f i f ty-s o m eth i n g -yea r-o l d bartender if he could put it on the Oscars.

Ah, Oscars on mute: castrated of all its annoying and hungry, thankful speeches said by all the wrong winners. I was left with nothing but beautiful women at the mercy of bad dress choices.

See OSCARS, page 20

arts

20

Oscars: brutalizing the film industry Conversation soon turned to the sexy brunette presenting the next award, who likewise sported a dress unsuitable for her body type.

I remarked how it didn’t matter, I’d still like to meet her, and found myself suddenly extremely pleased that I had asked the bartender to turn to the Oscars.

Then, over his head, I saw a laughing bald Jack Nicholson — apparently enjoying some joke I missed.

Why? Because the lack of volume on the bar T.V. managed to forcefully thrust even Oscar speech jokes right over my head. Jodie Foster always seemed to have the right idea, I thought; absenteeism seems like the most humble and respectable solution to this travesty of an awards ceremony.

I was suddenly tempted to order another whiskey. The least it could do is animate these dreary awards.

As the Oscars continued to flash across the screen, I almost wished I could hear at least some narrative to decipher who was winning what, or if the animalistic and cathartic The Departed had really so unexpectedly stolen best in show — let alone what was actually going on.

I wish I had the courage, balls or even self-confidence to ask the bartender to put the sound on.

Then again, what could beat the ‘70s rock and modern classics coming from Jack FM as if they were pouring down like rain from the heavens?

All the good times allowed the fourth dimension to continue on without care or notice. As my hazy gaze met that of the clock’s, I noticed that its disproportionate hands spelled lateness.

As I had then almost finished my third double whiskey, I leisurely recalled that there was somewhere that I needed to be — exactly two minutes ago!

As I ran for my eleven thirty bus on my two happy feet — Happy Feet won for best animated feature, by the way — at exactly eleven thirty-two, I was reminded of my three things: 1. my scatterbrain personality, and how it was likely to blame for this mess in the first place, 2. my affinity for whiskey; and 3. my extreme desire to get home.

“

I found myself masochistically watching the annual pretentious parade of sexy actors showing off their stuff

“

Continued from page 19

All memories, except for the latter, surmounted and drew me back quickly to finish my final drink for the evening. I then bee-lined to my bus, making it just in time to get on the snowy road to Kitchener.

Perhaps the fact that I missed my bus was a mixed blessing — a sanctioned cocktail of sorts. Perhaps it allowed me to view the Oscars for exactly what they are: a shallow brutalization of all that is sacred and beautiful about cinema.

I encourage wide-spread recognition for all artistic efforts — both efforts small and big — and especially for the celebrated, tremendously time-consuming art form that is film. But it’s the way in which the described festivities are orchestrated that discourages me.

With poise counting for much more than outstanding artistic ability, I found myself masochistically watching the annual pretentious parade of sexy actors showing off their stuff.

At least this year, like when in a class with a professor so ostentatious you make earplugs a part of your regular budget, I was safe.

Thanks to my casual pace, the snow-delayed subways and the slow-walkers everywhere I was rescued from such calamities and upset stomachs.

I was spared until next year —spared, that is, to enjoy the company of random women, an unusually friendly bartender who won’t stop staring and three generously poured double whiskeys.

So I’d just like to thank everyone involved in the production of my evening — all of my idols, each religious figure I praise in private along with everyone I’ve ever met in my entire life. I’d thank more people and things, but I hear my substage orchestra funeral bell tolling. aabela@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

March 2 to 6 Perfume — Original Princess $6 at Turnkey, Fri 9:30 p.m., Sat-Wed 7:00 p.m., Sun 2:00 p.m.

March 4 Bedouin Soundclash with Social Code and Inward Eye — Fed Hall Tickets can be won, 8 p.m.

March 4 Heartwood Blues featuring Sherwood Robertson — Stampede Corral $30 at the door, doors at 12 p.m.

February 28 to March 10 26th annual Laurier Art Show, featuring exhibitions by students, staff and faculty — Robert Langen Art Gallery

Dark play sparks theatrical innovation Dancer in the Dark Apollo Ink

Have you ever left a concert feeling like you want to learn the guitar — as if it’s even within reach? Well the production Dancer in the Dark at Apollo Ink gave me this feeling about theatre — that any of us can and should act.

This theatre piece was put together by a mixture of semi-professional and amateur actors.

Some had a lot of experience, and some very little. What started as an idea between friends, roughly four months ago, developed into a two night production that will soon reappear with funding from the city of Kitchener-Waterloo.

Dancer in the Dark was originally a film by Lars Von Trier, in which Björk starred. The plot follows a poor and half-blind factory worker, Selma, whose eyesight worsens as the day progresses.

She knows that she will soon go blind, and her daughter will suffer the same fate unless she intervenes. Selma has almost saved up enough to pay for the preventative operation. She daydreams in the factory and hears and sings music as she works. Unfortunately, and predictably, matters became more complicated. Selma lives in a trailer in the backyard of her “landlord.”

They are close friends and he confesses to having money problems due to his wife’s expensive tastes. If you haven’t seen Björk’s Dancer in the Dark, be warned not to bring along any young children for the explosive ending.

Jessica Westlake-Ferneyhough is cast as the lead role Selma, with Rabble Rouzer’s Galac playing the financially challenged Bill Houston, and Kevin Sutton as Selma’s smitten best friend.

The acting company changed the play slightly from its original, so that Kevin Sutton essentially plays two characters in one. If you haven’t seen the film, you wouldn’t have guessed, so it works well.

Nestled in with the audience is the Berlin Independent Orchestra, conducted by Dan Forsey. Their instruments include violins, a cello, percussion and an accordion. When the play breaks into song, the audience feels fully included, as the songs come from amongst them.

The percussion section is the one exception, which performs on stage using a cast-built contraption that includes cans,

Imprint’s listening to Red Hot Chili Peppers “Midnight”

Blue Rodeo “Hasn’t Hit me Yet” George Jones “He Stopped Loving her Today”

Basshunter “Boten Anna” Klaxons “Magic”

Friday, March 2, 2007

pots, triangles, and a buzzing television. In case this all seems totally unprofessional, it isn’t. The musicians are all experienced in the orchestra — some even have their own bands as well. The songs are well composed and performed, adding to the richness of the play. Ms. Westlake-Ferneyhough does a great job of sounding just like Björk, as well.

The cast also boasts that they put together this production with little to no money. The city offered the space Apollo Ink, near Kitchener City Hall on King Street.

The set is put together from various bargain finds, including a disassembled, reassembled and painted futon frame. The costumes come from the actors’ own closets. There are mics set up — although I’m not sure where they came from — and free coffee offered during intermission.

Overall, the approach is unconventional but the production is interesting — both accessible and enjoyable. I’ll have to admit, you shouldn’t be expecting good heating, or a perfect view of the stage, but if you want to restore your faith in local theatre, this is a good place to start. I might be starting up my own acting company in a few month’s time thanks to Dancer in the Dark, maybe. Alternatively, I’ll catch the next production when it appears, courtesy of Kitchener-Waterloo arts.

— Christine Ogley

March 7 Contact Dance Workshop — Multipurpose room, SLC Free, 7 p.m.

March 8 International Women’s Week Concert, featuring The Galaxy, The Guest Bedroom, Cara Wardwell, Knock Knock Ginger and Emm Gryner — Bomber, 7 p.m. pay what you can March 8 Guitar Hero Rokk Off hosted by UWGamers — SLC Great Hall $5 entrance fee for UW sudents, $7 for non-students 4:30 p.m.

March 8-11 Rainbow Reels Queer Film Festival — EIT, Room 1015 Free, for a listing of showtimes and films visit www.rainbowreels.org

Friday, March 2, 2007

arts

Beauty in brimstone

21

On the scent of something great

Portland punks stand strong before the apocalypse it seems only logical that somewhere in the world, young creatives will be mobilized by the inescapable feeling of looming death and destruction.

Sure enough, Portland, Oregon indie-punk trio The Thermals have released The Body, the Blood, and the Machine, a pounding, terrifying record of dystopic apocalyptic yearnings inspired by religious iconography and an I’d like to say something about the Rapture; Orwellian-tinged Christian future. It draws no, not the fashionable dance punk band on a world teetering on the edge of fire and from New York City, but that end-of-days, brimstone, and extracts from it some really, burning apocalypse scenario upon which all really catchy three-minute punk songs. It apgood Christians ascend to heaven while the pears, my friends, that indie rock has become legions of unfaithful descend into the death “Rapture Ready.”

Thermals’ singer/guitarist Hutch Harris and destruction of the Great Tribulation. Easy bellows his songs with the same determinato confuse, I understand.

The Lenten season has begun in Christen- tion of Corbitt confronting the world with dom, my dear readers, and across the world God’s message. Harris, however, seems less millions of followers have undertaken vows concerned with oncoming hellfire and more of penance in preparation for Easter. This worried about the growing influence of year, however, I cannot help but worry that, people like Corbitt.

In The Body, the Blood, and the Machine, instead of forcing children to give up candy The Thermals take us and soda pop for 40 days, into a Christian Fascist we should be helping future, where concentrathem prepare for the Come to think of tion camps are filled with increasingly imminent homosexuals and mothers Final Judgment. it, Christianity has who had performed aborJust ask Shelby Corbitt, who was visited bestowed upon the art tions, where war mongering crusaders launch holy

by God in 1986 and chosen as his messenger world a bit of a buzzkill wars on the unfaithful, a time of “locusts, tornato ensure that the world for a muse. does, crosses and Nazi is “Rapture Ready.” Her halos.” book, 2007, indicated The apocalypse Harris that, yes, Jesus will return this summer to act as a “boarding ticket” for sings of is different from the one that inspired God’s children, with faith securing your “rap- Michelangelo and Durer; his is one brought ture reservation.” The rest are condemned to not by God’s fist but by man himself. Lyrics “suffer through horrific worldwide destruc- target the popularity of the Christian Right, tion.” This summer. Guess there’s no point demanding the creation of “the new master enrolling in that fourth year history seminar race, ‘cuz we’re so pure.’” It is a carefully articulated critique of fundamentalism and this spring term.

While this may be bad news for the the fact that “we’ve built too many walls.” unfaithful, it is certainly good news for art The Thermals scream, “We were born to sin!” lovers. Why? Well, if anything inspires art- and somewhere in the world Shelly Corbitt ists, it’s the End of Days. Think of Albrecht faints in horror.

While it is true that the Vatican didn’t Durer’s magnificent Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse, Michelangelo’s legendary Sistine commission The Thermals’ record, one Chapel fresco The Last Judgement or Marcel must not dismiss it simply as the demonic, Duchamp’s heart-wrenching Fountain. All are gurgling excrement of the Antichrist. It is masterpieces — dark, gloomy, thoroughly more important for its condemnation of extremism in all forms, its warning of the depressing masterpieces.

Come to think of it, Christianity has be- potential for human devolution that comes stowed upon the art world a bit of a buzzkill with radicalism.

At the very least, if Jesus does return this for a muse. The Romans had Bacchus, and we get The Stoning of St. Stephen. I think it may summer and The Thermals do fall into the be time for the church to put more emphasis deep, dark abyss, they’ll know that they left the on Jesus’ ability to turn water into wine — I world with a catchy, provocative and powerful record. What can you say of yourself ? Are you guess it’s too late for that now.

With Shelly Corbitt’s warning, and a re- Rapture Ready? newed appreciation for evangelical Christian cmoffat@imprint.uwaterloo.ca ideas of the apocalypse in the United States,

courtesy IMDB

Ben Whitshaw plays a sociopathic perfumerist and serial killer in Perfume.

Perfume: The Story of a Murderer Directed by Tom Twyker Dreamworks

The Story of a Murderer. Quite a simple and accurate title, but must it involve the degradation of the greatest nose to smell on Earth? Couldn’t the title have spared Jean-Baptiste Grenouille, the protagonist without a concept of conscience, from such lowly designations? Could they not have labelled him more appropriately as a master perfumer?

I suppose not, though, for if I hadn’t read Perfume, I can’t imagine what interest I’d have in seeing a movie entitled Perfume: The Story of Perfumer or even just Perfume. Even biases aside, I’d probably write that movie off as a shitinspired love tale of boy meets girl involving love at first sight (or scent, considering a potential perfume undertone), then some intense sex scene in an implausible position or two, then utter heartbreak.

Movie title semantics aside, this movie was great. It fulfilled my wildest dreams and more — a very welcome change from the countless horrendous film adaptations I’ve seen in the past.

Perfume begins exactly the way the tale ends: with our favourite lovable amphibian friend Grenouille being caught by the ol’ French 5-0 and sentenced to execution. Not only does this provide a great way of developing intrigue early on in the film, but it also sets the viewers straight within about five minutes of being seated in the theatre (after the apparently necessary 20 minutes of advertisements ranging from BMW to some shampoo I don’t care about). Soon after it begins we are aware that Grenouille has been a bad boy and has been forced to pay for it.

This pulls you in, leaving you to wonder what such a nice and thin young Frenchman could have done to leave a bad taste in the collective mouths of 18th century France.

I’ve never heard about this in any history class I’ve taken, but apparently 18th century Frenchmen spoke English, with a British accent no less! Perhaps I have slept through one too many history classes in my life, or perhaps my French history classes have misled me, for I don’t think this historical depiction is entirely accurate. Although I’d be willing to bet that the former is true, I’m still convinced that this film should have been in French. How hard could it be to find an entirely French cast? Then again, though, I wasn’t complaining when I read the novel entirely in English.

Although Martin Scorsese and Milos Forman were also interested in adapting Perfume, I must mention that Tykwer did a wonderful job. Stanley Kubrick even predicted this film to be ultimately unfilmable! Now that Tykwer has shown how to take care of business Kubrick can now suck on the delicacy that is his foot.

The actual ending of the film, after which credits often follow, was brilliantly portrayed.

Even the wonderfully colourful suit on Grenouille’s execution day bore a remarkable resemblance to what I pictured in the novel.

And of course the proverbial mass orgy scene of dirty French people was equally if not more so gratifying than the same scene in the novel. I’m not sure why, but no matter how long the description is, reading about an orgy just does not compare to seeing a screen full of bare breasts.

Although you will probably be disturbed by this film’s uncommon and tangential choice of murderer, this film will also leave you glad that you put aside your French hating preconceptions for a meagre three hours.

I must warn you though, that after seeing Perfume, you might experience an unusual tendency to smell everyone you encounter.

— Andrew Abela

arts

22

Do you have the rhythm?

Rhythm Tengoku Game Boy Advance $45

Over the past few years, music and rhythm games have exploded into the mainstream scene with popular titles like Dance Dance Revolution, Donkey Konga and Guitar Hero. Many of these games contain licensed music featuring popular tunes or diving deep into a specific genre to offer fans their favourites. However, Rhythm Tengoku, an import Japanese rhythm game, delivers offbeat humour and tons of entertainment with simple rhythm and catchy themes that will keep players humming.

Rhythm Tengoku — roughly translated as “Rhythm Heaven” — shares a lot of its characteristics with Wari-

oware and it should be no surprise to players that both games were created

by Nintendo’s R&D1 development group.

Each of Rhythm Tengoku’s 48 music sets play like a full fledged boss battle in Warioware, encouraging the players to guess the control scheme and the point of the game based on the music and rhythm. Some games follow a call and response play style, where the computer takes the lead and players follow the music with the appropriate response.

Other games put players into reflex reaction mini games, where players react to on-screen elements to the beat of music. In one minigame, players shoot an arrow across a doorway to hit a ghost who comes in at every eight beats. In a memo-

Friday, March 2, 2007

Film: saving the escarpment Continued from page 19

rable twist, the game slowly turns the volume down, letting the players’ sense of rhythm take over.

Even though Rhythm Tengoku is a music game, the mini-stages take players on a wild and wacky adventure. No other game will have a scientist shooting bacteria with a fork, play baseball in outer space, practice calligraphy or even play as a samurai cutting up fly-like creatures.

Although it is a Japanese import game, knowledge of Japanese is not required for full enjoyment. Rhythm Tengoku is one game that transcends language barriers and is a refreshing experience that everyone should enjoy for themselves.

— Harold Li

Expansions to existing pits and quarries in the Niagara Escarpment area are permitted by amendment to the Niagara Escarpment Plan, and no major expansion of a pit or quarry has failed since the plan was first approved in 1985.

“When I heard that Nelson was going to blast a hole in the Escarpment,” said Harmer, her eyes blazing, in an opening interview on Escarpment Blues, “to take the rock and crush it for gravel, the passion rose up inside of me. We thought, what can we do about this?”

The tour was a way to raise awareness. But music never changed anything on its own. In the end the government makes the decisions, and in the end the government must answer to the people. So Harmer started PERL (Protecting Escarpment Rural Land), a citizen action group, to bring the people of the area together in opposition to the development.

“I’ve been working as a citizen, with local neighbours around Mount Nemo, doing regular work — writing submissions, going through the quarry application, hiring experts to come in,” Harmer said. “All trying to understand how these giant industrial projects are approved. We’ve been involved now for two years. We still have a long way to go.”

Reen captured PERL’s first victory on film for Escarpment Blues — Harmer on stage in a Kilbride gymnasium, report in hand. The Jefferson salamander, an endangered species in Ontario, was found in

a wetland on a piece of the land Nelson wants. The MNR rep in the crowd, at Harmer’s prompting, assures the people that these lands will be protected.

Now, eight months from that meeting, “the wetlands on site have just been re-evaluated,” Harmer said, “and scored as provincially significant wetlands, up from municipally significant wetlands.”

Aggregate extraction is not allowed on provincially significant land.

“It’s a fight that’s won in millimetres,” she said. “There are a lot of variables; there are always cracks in the armour of large industry.”

Alternatives Journal is presenting Escarpment Blues at the Princess Cinema on March 8. The film will start at 8:00 p.m. and be followed by a discussion period with Sarah Harmer. Tickets can be bought at Alternatives (bottom floor of ES), Princess Cinema, Old Goat Books and Encore Records.

They cost $15 — although there are a limited number of student tickets for $10 — and come with a free copy of Alternatives Journal and $10 off a subscription to the magazine.

The film was screened to sold out theatres in Toronto, and has recently been nominated for a Juno, which, for Harmer, is what the tour was all about.

“We must remember that the world is changing,” she said. “Our ideas of growth and big industry are being reinvented. For that, we need the input of common citizens to ensure what our rights are.” sbell@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

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arts

Friday, March 2, 2007

Identity Crisis Written by Brad Meltzer

You Suck: A Love Story Christopher Moore

DC Comics

WM Morrow

It’s rare to see a superhero cry. So when you actually do spot one with flooding tearducts, you know it’s not for just any trivial matter.

Identity Crisis, a collected series by Brad Meltzer, sees tears welling up in the eyes of superheroes worldwide when Sue Dibny, the wife of Elongated Man, is murdered.

With little to no evidence to go on, the Justice League of America and its associates begin a frantic search to find Sue Dibny’s killer. The suspect list begins to wear thin with nothing to show for it except blood and battle scars; then another family member of a superhero is attacked.

Identity Crisis takes us on a chilling journey, exploring what happens when superheroes lose their first line of defence — their secret identities. With that, superheroes lose the sense of invincibility that clouds over and protects them. Meltzer makes them as vulnerable as the rest of us, which begs the question: if superheroes can’t protect the ones they love, how will they be able to protect us?

Narrations from various characters throughout the comic expose you to the inner thoughts of each character; you feel their anger, hate, love and pain. This is a far cry from the early days of comics which saw vocalized thoughts which were usually very mechanical.

However, much like its predecessors, this comic expects its readers to be fairly knowledgeable of the history and mannerisms of its characters. You can enjoy the comic either way, but you might miss out on the subtleties in the behaviour of certain characters and plot elements.

Meltzer is very successful in adding that element of gritty realism to the comic, scripting a world eerily like our own. Shining a new light on how we see superheroes, Meltzer reminds us what we often forget: that most superheroes are, at the core, simply human.

Have you ever been reading a book and completely loved it, only to have the author make a boneheaded twist in the plot, and you went from loving the book to hating it? Unfortunately, that is what happened to me with this book. A sequel to Bloodsucking Fiends, our hero is Tommy Flood, known by his pen name C. Thomas Flood.

In the previous book, he was in love with a tall, sultry redhead who woke up one day a vampire, and Tommy was in love with her and her protector. This book begins with Tommy waking up a vampire also. At first, he thinks it is cool. But his conscience gets the best of him. He likes the power and the greater abilities, but he does not like taking life, or even taking blood.

This book also overlaps with Moore’s A Dirty Job. The focus of this story is the changing life of Thomas Flood and his girlfriend Jody, and a parallel story about Abby Normal, vampire wannabe, a servant of the vampire flood. She fetches coffee, finds new lairs and such.

It’s hard to write a hate-it review, when what you hate is the ending of the book, without spoiling it for those who are reading it or will read it. But I can state with all sincerity that of all of Moore’s books, this is not more fun, it is not more entertaining and it is not more Moore. It was in fact far, far less.

Like most of Moore’s books, this one is, at times, incredibly witty and always funny. But without spoiling the ending, the last chapter makes me hate this book.

There are so many other ways he could have ended the book, yet he chose a cheap and easy way out. The end of this book is so poor that you regret having spent the time and effort reading it. What should have been a light, fun romp through the nightlife of San Francisco is a complete flop because of the ending.

— Mohammad Jangda

— Steven R. McEvoy

23

The Reason Things Couldn’t Be Better

Apostle of Hustle National Anthem of Nowhere

Warner

EMI

For a band that treads in the same murky water as the majority of the Warped Tour acts from the past few years, it would seem completely unlikely that The Reason would follow a palatable, yet mostly lackluster release in 2004’s Ravenna with something with more substance and intrigue than its predecessor. But they did, and to quite an impressive extent no less. They’ve (thankfully) abandoned most of the clichéd elements of their ‘scene’ that once hindered their recorded material, but kept those elements of magic captured on record that granted a glimpse of the conviction and honesty abundantly present at their shows.

The record starts off with the minute-long “My Broken Legs,” which needs only half of this time to engulf the listener in the special experience that is this record. While still emotional, catchy and upbeat, these tracks bring in some dancy keyboards and more interesting guitar rhythms that enhance the band’s songwriting quite substantially without changing their overall sonic appeal. “All I Ever Wanted” could be the standout of the 12 tracks that make up this record, as Adam White’s voice is given the chance to shine over an energetic alternative rock song. Things Couldn’t Be Better won’t scare away many fans of the band, and if it does it’ll be the ones they can do without. It’s still The Reason, but they’ve managed to shed the cookie-cutter screamy-punk elements that poisoned their last two releases, allowing the elements that make them special to fully emerge as the foundation of each of their tracks.

Arts & Crafts are making money by signing good bands which make good music that they can then sell to smart people for profit.

Thank Christ, as this label can then bring acts like Broken Social Scene or their beautifully titled offshoot Apostle of Hustle to people’s attention. The latter not only share their guitarist with the former, but also an affinity for writing beautifully lucid rock songs that could make up the soundtrack to any activity involving ‘fun’ from lying on a beach with an imported beer to lying in bed with an imported wife. “A Rent Boy Goes Down” and the title track relay Apostle of Hustle’s BSS-esque ability to create an easy listening singalong rock track with subtle dynamics and intricate melodies that don’t get tiring even after a seemingly infinite amount of listens. They introduce a sexy, rhythmically enticing effort with “Rafata!” that uses Spanish lyrics to the advantage of their silky smooth sonic output.

I may be doing them an injustice by comparing them to another musical entity when they are quite able to earn listeners by their own merits, but I could round it out and say my dad thinks they kind of sound like The Police. While I’m too ignorant to listen to a lot of old rock, I can see what he means when I imagine someone tossing Sting a trumpet and an eight ball and telling him to play “Every Breath You Take.” Trust me, this is good music that can garner its own attention without my help, but use this advanced warning to your advantage and check them out.

— Andrew King

— Andrew King

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24

Science Imprint

Friday, March 2, 2007

science@imprint.uwaterloo.ca Science Editor: Rob Blom Science Assistant: Yolani Heltiarachchi

NASA’s Former B.C. Premier brings ICESat shows cause sustainable designing to Waterloo possible of warming The Honourable Michael Harcourt leads students towards a greener, healthier future Jen Stanfel reporter

Yolanie Hettiarachchi assistant science editor

People are taking an interest in the future as Canada deals with changing global approaches toward industry and environment. Sustainability has become a hot topic for discussion.

The Honourable Michael Harcourt, former mayor of Vancouver and Premier of B.C., has played a significant part in this social issue. His membership on the National Round Table on the Environment and the Economy from 1996 to 2004 is evidence of this.

On Tuesday, February 28, Harcourt — sponsored by TD Canada Trust — gave a public lecture titled Canada’s Cities: Competitive and Sustainable here at the university. Every seat in the Humanities Theatre was filled, which attests to public enthusiasm for, and curiosity about, tangible sustainable city design. “We all want sustainability, but we don’t know... how to achieve it,” commented geography student Alan Shonfield.

Harcourt’s visit was timely, as the city of Waterloo plans how it will accommodate a population expected to increase by 250,000 in the next two decades. Facing such tremendous expansion, how can we keep our communities livable?

According to Harcourt, we have the power to press our government to build sustainable communities, and the power to make choices in our own lives contributive to the sustainable community. He believes that the city has to be able to grow in such a way that it can continue to support its inhabitants — to sustain their way of life over time. In his opinion, we have seen “... enough studies, enough dire warnings; we have to act.”

Kirstin Boehme reporter

Jen stanfel

Harcourt (right) encourages UW students to make a sustainable change in their community.

Harcourt’s message armed the audience not only with knowledge of what one can do to improve communities’ sustainability, but also with the confidence needed to do it. He detailed many examples of successful change, describing some of his own city improvement projects in Vancouver.

Made prominent by Canadian media, one such project was his involvement in the building of quality housing on Vancouver’s Eastside in 1996.

Change, he says, begins when someone imagines an alternative to what’s established. “It’s not for your temporary employees, the politicians [to do]... you have to make it real for you.” Harcourt invites us to recognize that there is room for change, and that change can be effected realistically as we work with what we already have to make better use of it.

To make a difference, Harcourt said, “...this generation has to get with it

fast.” His goal is to wake students up to the present — to what’s being done to make Canadian cities more sustainable and what can still be done — so that in the future, we can continue to plan sustainable communities for ourselves and for the generations to come. He called this “passing the torch.”

Harcourt was at the university all week acting as a visiting professor. yhettiarachchi@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

The possibility of superimmunity Faisal Naqib staff reporter

One man has been granted the wish that every cancer patient hopes for: to make it go away. Doctors gave him less than a year to live, all conventional treatments used to treat skin cancer had failed, and the cancer had spread to his liver. This was in 2004. Today his tumours are gone and no cancer can be detected in his body; a miracle come true.

The explanation isn’t exactly heavenly or cosmological but a matter of genetic engineering. The patient was enrolled in a pilot clinical trial involving 17 patients, where their immune systems were reprogrammed by doctors to recognize and destroy their cancer.

The trick came in modifying the patients cytotoxic T-cells; these cells

Global meltdown may be attributed to rapid ice streams in Antarctica

locate, lock on and destroy bacteria or cells infected by a virus. T-cells have receptors (called T-cell receptors) that become specially modified for each threat to the well being of the body. During development of an immune cell, it learns to recognize cells constituting part of the body; this allows it to seek out foreign cells.

Cancer however, is developed from cells of the body, and so is capable of fooling the immune system.

The February 27 issue of New Scientist magazine explains that researchers took a gene responsible for coding a T-cell receptor that was targeting the cancer in a melanoma patient, and then extracted T-cells from the 17 patients enrolled in the trial and added the gene into the patient’s cells using a retrovirus. Following this, the cells were reintroduced into their respective hosts and given the

conditions necessary to grow and become the T-cell majority in the immune system.

Unfortunately, out of the 17 patients, only two responded. However, researchers remain optimistic as they believe the T-cell receptor used in this study did not bind strongly enough to the appropriate cell structure. They now believe that they have acquired much more potent receptors, allowing for a stronger bond.

This is a milestone study in tumour immunological research. As of right now, the clinical impact is limited, but modifications that will be capable of increasing efficacy are just on the horizon. A $14 million grant from the Bill and Melinda Gates Foundation will allow researchers to continue improving their methods as well as exploring further applications of this science.

Theoretically, if you add the right receptor to the T-cell you can direct it to engage any cell type you want. This is hopeful news for the victims of such diseases as HIV, tuberculosis and malaria that continue to claim lives everyday.

The method could also reverse autoimmune disorders such as juvenile diabetes, multiple sclerosis and even arthritis.

This treatment is similar to yet much more complex than vaccines that are widely used and have saved hundreds of millions of lives. Vaccines continue to improve, yet seem to be making little headway with diseases such as malaria and HIV. Genetic engineering of the immune system could pave the way for a cure to these elusive diseases. fnaqib@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

As changes in global climate become a harsh reality, not only must the world’s population attempt to halt sources of global warming, but it also becomes imperative to understand the implications of the Earth’s soaring temperatures. One such after-effect involves the melting of the Antarctic polar ice sheets, which constitute 90 per cent of the Earth’s ice resources.

Beneath these ice sheets exists an intricate network of fast-flowing ice streams, or channels of moving ice.

Research conducted on these streams aids scientists in anticipating the ice stores’ future resistance to rising temperatures, as well as detects any fluctuation in sea-levels.

Recently, however, attention has turned towards a multitude of lakes found below these rapidly-moving ice streams, as they too may facilitate the melting of the Antarctic ice sheets.

First discovered under the Whillans and Mercer ice streams, data from NASA’s ICESat (Ice, Cloud and land Elevation Satellite), along with information gathered by drilling holes through the ice, have proven that the quantity of lakes, as well as the volume of water transferred, is much greater than previously estimated.

The calculation of water volumes moving in and out of the reservoirs is made possible by NASA’s ICESat, which is able to utilize laser pulses to measure the areas of the ice surface which have risen or fallen over a given period of time.

Researchers, such as Helen Fricker of the University of California’s San Diego Scripps Institute of Oceanography, believed that any substantial water movement within these subglacial lakes would take years to decades to occur. However, studies are quickly establishing that this is not the case; significant volumes are transferring in a matter of months. Subglacial Lake Engelhardt, for example, experienced drainage of two cubic kilometres of water, while Subglacial Lake Conway gained 1.2 cubic kilometres during the three year span from 2003 to 2006.

Unfortunately, despite the study having found a net increase in lake water volumes, the direct influence this may have upon the Antarctic ice sheets has yet to be determined.

The reservoirs, which may be the direct result of erosion from the ice streams, have the potential to ease the movement of the channels of ice towards the outer edges of the sheet.

Whereas the interior of the sheet is able to hinder any melting of the ice, the floating edges are unable to offer such protection.

science

Friday, March 2, 2007

Yolanie Hettiarachchi assistant science editor

Embryonic cells in mice promote regeneration of teeth

A new method to regenerate teeth and whiskers in mice has been developed

by Japanese scientist Takashi Tsuji of the Tokyo University of Science and his colleagues. The process involves cells that are taken from the mouths of mouse embryos and placed in collagen gel, where they multiply and develop into tooth germs. The germs are then implanted into the mouse’s stomach where they grow to become primitive teeth. These teeth are then implanted a final time into the rodent’s mouth.

Alternatively, the tooth germ can be implanted directly into an empty socket where a tooth has been pulled, omitting implantation into the stomach.

In a procedure similar to the one used to regenerate teeth, the scientists were able to create whiskers as well.

Despite a few hindrances — such as a lack of development of teeth past the primitive stage — the method may someday help to create replacements for more necessary organs, such as the heart, liver or kidneys.

The findings are published in the February 26 issue of the journal Nature Methods.

study of 1500 heavy Tylenol users shows that none of them suffered heart attacks or strokes for a year.

The study is published in the Archives of Internal Medicine.

new cells than in the non-pregnant mice. With further analysis, Samuel Weiss of the University of Calgary and his colleagues discovered that prolactin — a pregnancy hormone that promotes breast development and milk production — contributed to this event. When prolactin was given to the non-pregnant mice, it was evident that the myelinated cells had doubled in number.

Patricia O’Looney at the U.S. National MS Society in New York warns that prolactin could promote lactation in both men and non-pregnant women. In addition, since MS is believed to be an autoimmune disease in which the body attacks itself, prolactin could increase danger for MS sufferers.

MS damage may be reversed by pregnancy hormone

Multiple sclerosis (MS) results when myelin, the sheath of fatty membranous tissue that protects parts of nerve cells, is destroyed, interrupting the communication between nerves.

To create this effect in female mice, a toxin that degrades myelin cells was injected into the spine of the rodents, some of whom were then allowed to copulate and become pregnant.

It was found that the spinal cord in pregnant mice had many more

25

Spear-making chimps linked to human ancestors

Researchers in Senegal, West Africa have observed the region’s chimpanzees making deadly spears from sticks, using them to hunt prey.

This is the first time that this routine production of weapons has been seen in any nonhuman animal.

The hunters, primarily female, tear the branches off straight sticks, removing the bark and sharpening one end. They then hold the weapons in a so-called “power-grip” and dart them into tree hollows where bush babies — small, monkey-like mammals — sleep during the day.

The discovery also raises questions about human ancestry. Although

many believe that the use of wooden tools predates that of stone tools, archaeological findings indicate otherwise, most likely because of wood’s inability to preserve well. However, the actions of the Senegalese chimpanzees support the idea that early humans made wooden weapons before stone was used.

According to lead researcher Jill D. Pruetz of Iowa State University, only one chimp out of the 22 observations made was successful in acquiring the bush baby.

— With files from National Geographic, New Scientist, the New York Times, Scientific American, and the Washington Post. yhettiarachchi@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

A new addition to an old constellation

The Southern Cross, one of the most familiar constellations in the southern sky, may contain a new binary star.

It appears that the new star — a system consisting of two stars orbiting around their centre of mass — is about 37 billion miles from Beta Crucis, the bright star that forms one arm of the Southern Cross.

Researchers at NASA’s Chandra X-Ray Observatory found two sources of X-rays instead of the one they were initially looking for to study the stellar winds of Beta Crucis. The discovery is surprising, because the binary star seems to be of the 11th magnitude — which usually allows scientists to detect such stars easily.

Beta Crucis is about 16 times the size of the sun and 350 light-years from Earth. The newly discovered binary star is hypothesized to be the size of the Sun and about 11 million years old.

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Rise in blood pressure blamed on popular painkillers

According to U.S. researchers, an increase in blood pressure may arise due to the intake of popular painkillers such as ASA, ibuprofen and acetaminophen, causing an increase in the risk of heart disease among men.

Men who used the common drugs for most days in a week were onethird more likely to have a higher blood pressure than those refraining from taking them. The findings are very similar to a 2002 study which demonstrated that these drugs raise blood pressure in women.

“This is a potentially preventable cause of high blood pressure,” says lead scientist Dr. John Forman of Boston’s Brighman and Women’s Hospital.

Tylenol manufacturer McNeil Consumer Healthcare states that its

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Sports Imprint

26

Friday, March 2, 2007

sports@imprint.uwaterloo.ca Sports Editor: Shawn Bell Sports Assistant: Doug Copping

Western’s out; Laurier’s next James Rowe staff reporter

After dropping game two of their best of three OUA quarter-final series with the Western Mustangs in overtime, the Waterloo Warriors won the deciding game 2-1 on February 25.

The Warriors will now face their cross-town rivals, the Wilfrid Laurier Golden Hawks, in a match up featuring the top two teams in the OUA. The winner of the series will move on to the OUA Championship and will also earn a berth in the CIS Championships.

Having taken game one of the series against Western with a 3-2 home win, the Warriors travelled to London for game two on February 24.

After a scoreless first period at Thompson Arena, Waterloo took the lead midway through the second period, when Doug Spooner beat Western goalie Brad Topping to break the tie. Kevin Hurley and David Philpott assisted.

A little over five minutes later UW extended their lead. This time it was Bryan Fitzgerald finding the back of the net with assists going to Mike Della Mora and Joel Olszowka.

Leading 2-0 heading into the third period, the Warriors were 20 minutes away from completing the two-game sweep and moving on to the next round.

But the Mustangs, who played the Warriors to tight scores all season long despite losing all four regular season meetings, came out strong.

Facing elimination, Western threw everything they had at the Warriors, outshooting UW 16-5 in the third.

The pressure began to pay off when Jason Ertl cut the lead in half with just under 12 minutes remaining.

Then, with less than two minutes to play, Western’s leading scorer Sal Peralta beat UW netminder Curtis Darling to tie the game and send it to overtime.

The Mustangs maintained the pressure in overtime and eight minutes into the second overtime period Ryan Waldner scored the game winner to extend the series back to Waterloo for a third and deciding game.

Game three was played the following night at the CIF Arena and was a tight-checking game.

Heading into the third the game remained scoreless thanks to strong goaltending by Topping and Darling.

Just two minutes into the third UW’s Jordan Brenner got the Warriors on the board with assists going to Della Mora and Frank Fazio.

As they had all series, the Mustangs responded. Waldner scored a power play goal midway through the period to tie things up and once again the game looked destined for overtime.

After being the Western hero for most of the series, Waldner took a hooking penalty with just six minutes left.

On the ensuing power play, Ryan Macgregor buried what would be the series winner, with Brenner and Della Mora getting the helpers. Macgregor also scored the game winner late in Game one of the series.

From there the Warriors were able to hold off the Mustangs, led by Darling who turned aside 38 shots in the win. jrowe@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

photos by simona cherler

OUA semifinals against Laurier Game 1 - Wednesday February 28 7:30 p.m. at Waterloo Rec Centre (Laurier wins 5-3) Game 2 - Friday March 2 7:30 p.m. at Columbia Ice Fields Game 3 - Sunday March 4 7:30 p.m. at Waterloo Rec Centre

Above: Ryan Macgregor (10) awaits the pass from David Edgeworth (13). Macgregor buried the Mustangs, scoring the winner in game one and game three.

Left: Sean Roche scores in the third to tie game one at 2.

James Rowe staff reporter

The Waterloo Warriors’ and Wilfrid Laurier Golden Hawks men’s hockey teams meet up this weekend in a highly anticipated OUA semifinal series.

The two teams finished tied atop the OUA regular season standings and both are ranked among the top ten teams in the country.

This showdown marks the third straight post-season in which the two schools have met, with both squads winning once. Each of the past two series have gone to a third and deciding game, with WLU eliminating the Warriors last season.

The stakes are higher this year, however. The winner will move on

to the OUA Championship, a one game final against the winner of the Toronto-UQTR series.

On top of that the winner will also gain a berth in the CIS Championships that will be held in Moncton, New Brunswick from March 22-25.

Offensively Waterloo will look to David Edgeworth, the team’s regular season scoring leader, and Ryan Macgregor who had both game winners against Western. They lead a balanced attack that was second in the OUA in goals for this year with an average of 4.25 per game.

Laurier counters with the highest scoring offense in the league.

Led by Mark Voakes’ 43 points in 28 games, Laurier averaged 4.71 goals per game this year.

One of the keys to the series will be Waterloo’s effectiveness in killing off penalties. In their first meeting Laurier scored four power play goals en route to an 8-6 road win. The WLU power play is led by Chris Di Ubaldo, who had ten goals with the man advantage this year.

In the second meeting the Warriors did not give up a power play goal against but still fell to Laurier, 4-3 in overtime.

The Golden Hawks are coming off an impressive two game sweep of the defending OUA champion Lakehead Thunderwolves. The sweep extended their current winning streak to 11 games.

The Warriors may have an edge in goaltending as last year’s OUA West MVP Curtis Darling was in top form

in the Western series.

Laurier counters with Jeff MacDougald who was 11-3 with a 2.82 goals against average and 0.92 save percentage on the season. Darling was 11-5-1 with an identical goals against average and save percentage to that of MacDougald.

The series got underway on February 28, when Laurier won 5-3 at home. This weekend has two games on the schedule. Game two is Friday night at 7:30 p.m. at the CIF Arena.

Any remaining tickets will go on sale one hour prior to game time.

If necessary, the third and deciding game will be played Sunday, March 4 at 7:30 p.m. at the Rec Centre. jrowe@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

sports

Friday, March 2, 2007

27

Warriors attack track Shawn Bell sports editor

Kate Bickle, Drew Haynes and Jamie Hauseman attack the track.

Presents

THIS WEEK IN ATHLETICS

bill bickle

The University of Waterloo does not have a track and field facility. The University Waterloo does have a track and field team. This contrast makes training hard. The Warriors’ sprinters, throwers and high jumpers train in the PAC, while the long distance runners and jumpers train at the Waterloo Memorial Recreation Complex. It also makes recruiting hard. Western and York have full indoor track facilities that attract top local athletes.

Regardless, the Waterloo Warriors’ track and field team is chock full of great athletes, as demonstrated by the team’s results in Windsor at the OUA Championship, where the Warriors had three season bests and four personal bests, including captain Jennifer Bell’s new Waterloo varsity record in the pentathlon. “I think our performances were very good,� Bell said, “considering that we have a very small team and our facilities are somewhat limited, other schools are always impressed and somewhat surprised at our results.�

These results are the accumulation of months of hard work. The team began training back in September. “There’s a long training season,� said coach Jason Dockendorf, “unlike a lot of other sports, where you have tryouts and then start playing the season. We also have athletes filter in from other sports throughout the year.� Case in point, Warriors football DB Drew Haynes is a key member of the 4x400m relay team, who finished fifth at OUAs, is ranked tenth in the country and will be part of the 11-member Warrior contingent at the nationals.

The tournament season began in December at Western. In total, there were seven meets across Ontario and Quebec at which individual Warriors raced the clock to earn their spots in the OUA and national championships. “As a team,� Dockendorf said, “our main goal is to have as many personal bests as possible. Then we try to win as many team points as possible.� Team points are awarded for top-eight finishes — for example, Waterloo men’s captain Emeka Ukwuoma placed eighth in the 60m sprint at OUA Championship, running a personal best 7.01 seconds and earning points for the team. “Finally,� the coach continued, “we try to qualify as many people as

possible for the OUA and national tournaments.�

The top times from the season qualify for the provincials and nationals. Also, the top two finishers in each event at the OUA Championship earn an automatic berth in the nationals.

However, the OUA takes times from 200m tracks only, which generally results in slower times. The nationals, meanwhile, take the top times from across the season, regardless of what surface they were recorded on.

For the Nationals, happening March 16 and 17 at McGill, Waterloo is well represented - eleven Warriors will be off to Montreal. That includes six women, led by their captain Bell, who goes into the pentathlon ranked sixth in the country. The pentathlon is a one-day event, composing the 60m hurdles, high jump, long jump, shot put and 800m.

Bell will be chasing last weekend’s record setting performance. She’ll need to beat two Western Mustangs if she hopes to reach the podium.

Bell also runs on the 4x200m relay team. The girls are seeded tenth and need to run a flawless race to catch the eight seed team from Laval.

The Warriors 4x400m relay team, composed of Kate Bickle, Jamie Hauseman, Caitlin Lee and Cindy Willits — all except Lee also run the 4x200m — is currently seeded ninth in Canada. The team finished sixth at OUA Championship with a time of 4:04.66, well off their season best of 4:01.11. They’ll be pushing to catch eighth ranked McGill who have a season best just over one second quicker than Waterloo.

The men’s team will send five Warriors, all runners. The 4x400m relay team of Kirk Ewen, Colin Lawrence, Haynes and Ukwuoma finished fifth in Windsor and are ranked tenth in Canada. The 4x200m relay team of Ukwuoma, Ewen, Kyle Raymond and Jeremiah Derksen ran to sixth in Windsor and are ranked ninth going into Nationals. “I am really pleased we qualified six women to the CIS Championships this year,� Dockendorf said, “the first qualifications for the women’s team in three years. The athletes going to CIS are both physically and mentally fit and ready to perform.�

McGill has a banked 200m track that the Warriors are ready for. “Some of our fastest times of the year came at the McGill meet,� Dockendorf said. “[Our team] is familiar and comfortable with the facility at McGill so I expect, and anticipate, that some serious performances will surface at the championships.� sbell@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

MEN’S HOCKEY OUA SEMI-FINAL

GAME 2 TONIGHT! Mar 2, 7:30pm CIF Arena ~ limited tickets available on sale at Athletics Office: adults $9 / students $7 GAME 3, if necessary, SUNDAY, MARCH 4 AT WLU, 7:30 pm, Waterloo Rec Complex ~ listen to all games live at CKMSfm.ca ~

ATHLETES OF THE WEEK

ALEX WATSON, SWIMMING A 4th year Arts student from Oshawa, Ontario completed his swimming career as a Warrior with alifetime personal best and a bronze medal in the 200m butterfly with a time of 2:03.08 at the CIS Championships in Halifax. This was a 2.08 second improvement from the OUA championships. Alex also had personal best time in the 100m fly and placed second in the consolation final (11th overall) with a time of 56.94.

Alex’s 15th placing in the 50 fly meant that he scored points in all three butterfly events. Along with Oleg Chemukhins’ placings, the two swimmers achieved 15th place as a “team� at the championships (5th place OUA school, moving up one spot from OUA conference championships)

SARAH BRYSON, HOCKEY A 3rd year Arts student from Kitchener, Ontario scored the game winning goal in Waterloo’s 2-1 win over the Rock Badgers on Friday evening to secure a playoff spot for the Warriors. Sarah also scored the lone goal for Waterloo in the regular season finale losing 2-1 to Toronto. Waterloo finishes in sixth spot in the OUA standings and will advance to the playoffs for the second time in their short history.

Waterloo will play at Queen’s on March 4.

sports

28

Women’s hockey make playoffs

Friday, March 2, 2007

Insurance company’s bail costs paraplegic Sukhpreet Sangha staff reporter

simona cherler

Kaitlin McDonald (6) leads the charge against Toronto. The Warriors lost 2-1 but beat Brock to earn sixth and final playoff spot.

Matt Levicki reporter

“It’s do or die.” “Our backs are against the wall.” “Win or go home.” “There is no tomorrow.” Any of these common hockey clichés can be heard inside the dressing room of a team that finds themselves in a must-win situation. That is exactly what the Warriors women’s hockey team was facing last Friday, Feburary 23 as they travelled to Brock with their playoff

hopes on the line. They had to win or risk being eliminated from playoff contention.

The Brock Badgers would provide fierce competition on this night. After a fast-paced first period, the Badgers held a 1-0 lead. Despite trailing, not one Warrior would reach for the panicbutton, showing confidence they would prevail.

The Warriors came out flying in the second period with all kinds of pressure, eventually leading to the equalizer by Kaitlyn MacDonald. The

game stayed tied at 1-1 until the dying moments of the third period, setting up a dramatic finish. In a game of such crucial importance, a team often turns to their top line to do something special. All year long, the Warriors top line has been Sarah Bryson, Michelle Curtis and Randi Wilson, and once again they came through with some late game heroics.

With less than two minuets left on the clock, Bryson and Wilson combined to set up Curtis for her

fourth goal of the year and playoff spot clinching goal. After the game Bryson, who led the Warriors in goals and points this season, commented on the big win: “Coming into the year, it was a team goal to make the playoffs. It feels really good to achieve that goal because of all the hard work and dedication we have put into the season.”

The Warriors then faced the Toronto Varsity Blues Saturday, February 24 at the CIF in a game to improve playoff positioning. The Varsity Blues proved to be too strong for the Warriors on the afternoon, earning a 2-1 victory. The weekend split gives the Warriors a regular season record of 8-11-3-2; enough for the sixth playoff spot in the OUA. Waterloo now turns their focus to the playoffs. They will travel to Kingston on Sunday to play the eighth-ranked Queens’ Golden Gaels in a one game sudden death match-up. The season series was extremely tight between these two teams with every game being decided by only one goal.

Looking ahead to the upcoming battle versus Queen’s, Bryson commented on the Warriors mindset and what they have to do to win: “We have to stay positive. The only thing we can control is our game. We need to stay focused, finish around the net, and stay out of the penalty box.” If the Warriors do this, they have a great chance to knock off the Gaels.

Now that the playoffs have started, every game will be pressure packed.

The Warriors will repeat those hockey clichés before Sunday’s game, and the only thing they hope to come away with is a win.

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In Imprint Vol. 29, No. 27, in the article entitled All Stars, all ours, new Warrior football training camp coach Don Sutherin’s name was misspelled as Sutherland. Imprint Sports sincerely apologizes to coach Sutherin for the mistake.

When Sean Corner hit the rugby pitch playing starting scrum half for the Hamilton Hornets RFC on September 9, 2006, he expected it to be a regular game. But during the game his spine was broken in a clean tackle, leaving him a paraplegic — paralyzed from the waist down. As if this was not unfortunate enough, the catastrophe insurance of his team, and in fact of all of Rugby Canada’s affiliated league teams, had been cancelled the previous day, so Corner’s injuries weren’t covered for compensation.

Rugby Canada governs all Canadian club rugby and had been covered through Lloyds of London Insurance for the past two and a half years. During this period of time, their catastrophe insurance claims had grown to over $1 million in settlements, while the company itself was only collecting $70,000 in premiums.

Therefore, Lloyds of London cancelled their catastrophe insurance policy with Rugby Canada, while continuing coverage for liability and medical insurance.

For the latter two policies, fault must be proven to receive compensation. The catastrophe insurance policy was “no fault,” with automatic payment of up to $500,000.

The catastrophe insurance policy was cancelled at 12:01 a.m. on September 8. Rugby Canada started a chain of emails the previous day, wherein the heads of provincial Rugby unions, presidents of city rugby clubs and individual players were each successively notified of the policy change.

Sean Corner received this message in his junk mail, due to his spam filter, so he played the September 9th game expecting to be covered. According to a Canadian Press article on cbc.ca, most players “just kept playing” after hearing of the policy change.

The provincial health plan does cover Corner’s medical expenses but catastrophe insurance would have been of much service in paying for items like a wheelchair, as well as home and car accessibility renovations.

Sean Corner is 21 years old and now dreams of the day he can step onto the rugby pitch once more. He is said to remain extremely positive about his situation, which is so rife with irony as his father works for an insurance company and Corner himself had been hired to work for an insurance firm just weeks prior to his injury.

Rugby Canada encourages the entire rugby community to support Corner with bill payments.

UW’s own men’s rugby team is holding a benefit fundraiser for Corner in the form of a prize draw at the Bomber on March 10. Prizes include a custom fit snowboard with bindings, a $500 gift package to a health club and various others. Tickets are being sold from 11:00 a.m. to 2:00 p.m. in the SLC, from March 2 to March 9.

Corner’s team, the Hamilton Hornets, have set up a Sean Corner Benefit Fund which can be reached at www. hamiltonrugby.com/sean. In a January 10 article on Rugby Canada’s official website, project spokesman Mark Lawson is quoted as saying the fund had “received just under $15,000” so far. sshangha@imprint.uwaterloo.ca