Imprint_2009-02-27_v31_i28 by Editor Imprint

Impr int Friday, February 27, 2009

crime on campus

imprint . uwaterloo . ca

vol 31, no 28

See pages 15-18 for details

Part 2: Stealing

After the math

Allan Babor, Feds pres Tight races, wide leads, and decisions questioned in Feds election staff reporter

he Feds Elections Committee finally released the official results of its recent elections on Monday, after a week and a half of delays blamed on problems with the voter roll. The most eagerly anticipated executive race also resulted in the tightest executive margin: Feds’ new President-elect Allan Babor topped his nearest competitor, Sam Andrey, by just 48 votes. Babor’s excitement was evident in the huge leap into the air he made as the results were announced. “Ideas on campus are flowing like a river,” Babor said, and stated he was “excited to move forward,” as the new Feds president. The president-elect declared that the close race was a challenge that would push him to “set concrete goals” to bring together a divergent university community. According to Babor, Andrey and the other candidates “have great ideas” that he would adopt when the new executive consider their official agenda for the year. Babor said his current goals are to learn about the ins and outs of his new role and make new connections with all of the full-time Feds staff. He also stated he planned on ensuring that current Feds’ projects would continue operating and evolve without any noticeable downtime. For his part, Andrey expressed disappointment in the close race, but thanked his fellow teammates, along with his volunteers and supporters. “I’m very happy that the other three members of our team will be our new VPs and I have no doubt that together, with Allan, they are going to serve students extremely well,” said Andrey. Sarah Cook, the VP-elect internal, and Justin Williams, the VP-elect education, both won their

respective races by safe margins. Cook expressed her eagerness to work with fellow executives-elect and indicated that she has developed a “good working relationship” with all three through other campus projects. “This executive has both very experienced members, and some fresh ideas,” she said. Babor, Cook and Williams will join VPAF Chris Neal, who was acclaimed to his position earlier this month, to complete the new Feds executive. Neal told Imprint that he was “excited” to be working with the new members of the executive and believes that Babor in particular has “a lot of great ideas and it will certainly be a positive experience to mesh our ideas together and move Feds forward.” The new executive takes office following the winter semester. Chief Electoral Officer John Andersen also announced the results of senate races on Monday. The at-large seat went to Muhammad Ali Akbar, who edged Raynold Alorse out by 88 votes; 1, 228 voters chose no candidate at all in that race. Jay Shah won the engineering seat with 211 votes, 12 more than Devin Cass and David Shuang Lu, who each had 199 votes. Dave Smith took the AHS seat with a definitive 229 votes. The math senate seat went to Ajnu Jacob, who defeated Ian Kasper by just one vote. Jacob conveyed appreciation to his supporters, “all of [their] votes have mattered and I am grateful for this.” Kasper said that, given he had been away on a co-op term, was “very surprised” by the tight margin and promised to “work with Ajnu and the other student senators to… push forward an agenda” as a member of the math senate. See RESULTS, page 3

Feds president-elect Allan Babor, left, celebrates with a supporter after winning by 50 votes over Sam Andrey, right, who is turned away just after the announcement. The rest of Team Green — Justin Williams, Sarah Cook, and acclaimed Chris Neal — all won in their respective races.

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“I’m very happy that the other three members of our team will be our new VPs and I have no doubt that together, with Allan, they are going to serve students extremely well.” — Sam Andrey former Feds candidate

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Ryan Webb

mark zammit

News

Imprint, Friday, February 27, 2009 news@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

RESULTS: The winners at last Feds executive winners President

Allan Babor VP Internal

Sarah Cook VP Education

Justin Williams

Senate winners Senator At-Large

Muhammad Ali Akbar Engineering Senate

Jay Shah Math Senate

Ajnu Jacob

Mark Zammit

John Andersen, chief electoral officer, and Andrew Falcao, VP Internal, announce the results of the Feds elections Monday, February 23 in the SLC’s Multipurpose Room.

AHS Senate

Dave Smith

Continued from cover

Student council winners Arts Council Monica Chamberland Amanda Tkaczyk Matthew Waller Brittany Boilard Diana Hanna Science Council Matt Colphon Muhammad Ali Akbar Humberto Vigil Alice Qi Math Council Christine Thayer Tareq Ismail Ian Kasper St. Jerome’s Council Scott McKee

Winners of the student council elections were also announced. All five members of the arts council were elected; they will be: Monica Chamberland, Amanda Tkaczyk, Matthew Waller, Brittany Boilard and Diana Hanna. Three of five math council seats were filled; the winners were: Christine Thayer, Tareq Ismail and Ian Kasper. Science council filled all four of its seats, and the winners were: Matt Colphon, Muhammad Ali Akbar, Humberto Vigil, and Alice Qi. SJU’s one council seat went to Scott McKee. To accommodate co-op students, the remaining council positions will be filled in spring semester by-elections. As Imprint reported last week, the elections committee had disqualified 18 candidates for failing to submit a mandatory “Zero Campaign Expenses” form. The form is to inform Feds of campaign expenditures and is a crucial element of Feds elections policies. However on February 19, the Feds Board of Directors moved to overturn the decision of its elections committee and to retroactively extend the deadline for submitting the form. As a result, many of the candidates that had been disqualified had their disqualifications reversed. Jeff Henry, the chief returning officer, was part of the committee that made the original decision and said that the original decision was an element of “fair elections.” Notice of the budget requirements was given in candidate packages and debriefing at the beginning of the election season, and followed up with reminders on the elections mailing list throughout the process. Feds president-elect Babor said the reversal was a “wise decision” to uphold the will of the electorate, given the sheer number of candidates who had been removed. At the

same time, Babor indicated that it remains “the candidates’ responsibility to follow the rules.” Cook told Imprint that the rule “clearly wasn’t communicated well enough” to the candidates. She also took issue with the procedure that was followed: normal protocol would have the candidates appeal to the election committee directly. In follow-up, Babor agreed with Cook’s assessment that poor communication by the elections committee attributed to the situation. The elections committee stated last week that the results of the election were delayed following several problems where groups of voters were unable to cast a vote in races that they should have had been able to vote in. Jacob claimed that “apart from the software engineers and CFM students” Imprint reported on last week, “teaching option students who are currently completing their B.Ed. at Queen’s” were not entered into the voting lists correctly. The math senate-elect said he “strongly” feels that the close margin in his race was attributable to “technical flaws involved in composing the voter’s list.” Both Babor and Cook indicated they felt “glitches” in the voting process had made the process too painful for voters, and that this affected turnout. Another issue that came up involved a supporter of Babor leaving a comment on his Facebook group after the campaining period had officially ended. The elections committee levied a 15 per cent fine against him for the infraction. Though the policies were updated last year, both Cook and Babor indicated they felt the policy regarding campaign tools should be less ambiguous and could use reconsideration for Web 2.0 technologies. Feds’ campaign policies must “keep up with the social tools being used” by the student body, Babor told Imprint. Complete election results are located at vote.feds.ca.

Black History Month comes to term in its last week E. Aboyeji staff reporter

ctivities marking this year’s Black History Month Celebrations seem to have converged this week at UW. On Tuesday, Imprint attended the WPIRG sponsored Annual Black History Month Lecture by Laurier History Professor, Dr. Dana E. Weiner. The lecture, “Conflicting Visions of Equality,” centered on the United States slavery movement, grass root’s activism and race. In her lecture, she explored the history of the anti-slavery movement and the competing views within it as it concerned the meaning of equality. She spoke about the old northwest,

now the mid-west, and how it had been the battle ground of many a debate pertaining to the morality of slavery. Tracing the origin of the anti slavery movement from the Quakers’ convictions to the American civil war, she explained that free slaves and abolitionist whites formed the foundations of the anti-slavery movement. Her lecture highlighted some rather surprising historical facts. One of these was that that many white northerners had actually supported the antislavery movement, not just because of moral convictions, but because they saw the southern imposed gag on debating the morality of slavery as a threat to freedom of speech. Another was that at certain points in the

anti-slavery movements, there were rifts even among freed blacks. For example, they debated the merit of non-violence in advancing abolition, especially since some slaves who had escaped were being recaptured from the north by southern slave masters. They also very strongly debated the need for the immediate abolition of slave trade versus a long term view to promoting racial justice. The audience was even able to discover that the racially derogatory phrase “Uncle Tom,” which came from an abolitionist novel called Uncle Tom’s Cabin by Harriet Beecher Stowe, which sold over a hundred thousand copies only a short time after it was released, had made a significant impact on the anti-slavery debate.

At the end of the two-hour lecture, one came away with an appreciable understanding of the circumstances that had birthed freedom for slaves in 19th century America. Another, less academic event, is planned for Thursday at the Bomber. The Black History Month Gala, organized by One Waterloo and UW Base will begin by 7p.m. Organizers hope to commemorate black history month in music, art, spoken word performances, and other interesting theatrical acts through the night. Imprint’s press deadline makes Thursday events impossible to report on prior to Friday publication. eaboyeji@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

News

Imprint, Friday, February 27, 2009

There’s nothing foreign about winning Caitlin McIntyre staff reporter

niversity of Waterloo’s own Foreign Affairs Society (FAS) has been working up an impressive reputation for the University of Waterloo this year. FAS, formerly known as WatMUN, hosts weekly discussions on current political issues and, as their name implies, foreign affairs. Their primary function as a club is to conduct training for Model UN simulations and conferences, such as the two they have attended this semester. The first of these conferences being the annual McMUN, McGill Mock UN, in Montreal, took place from January 29th to February 1st. FAS sent an incredible 33 delegates to the event, their largest turn out yet, and came home with some impressive results. One of UW’s

The Toronto based North American MUN occurring this past reading week also yielded a “Best Delegate” award for Ben Haist as India on the Economic and Financial Committee. “We’re really glad with the progress this year under our president, Keith. UWFAS has some excellent delegates this term and we’ve been able to hold our own at conferences,” member Evan Bell said when asked about the club. Thanks to their dedicated members, and funding from the Arts Endowment Fund, FAS is a true up and-comer on the club scene and is currently planning to hold their very own MUN, here at UW. For more information on how to get involved in FAS you can contact the club at contact.fas@gmail.com

attending delegates, Mat Thijssen, won a “Best Delegate” award for his position as head representative of OXFAM at the non-governmental organization

Mat Thijssen (NGO Forum) Best Delegate, McMun Keith McManamen Honourable Mention, McMun Ben Haist (ECOFIC) Best Delegate, NAMUN forum. The president of FAS, Keith McManamen, also earned himself an honourable mention in the conference for his involvement in the French-Algeria 1956 Crisis Committee.

cmcintyre@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

Maggie Clark editor-in-chief UofO prof. faces dismissal for changing course; students sue

A saga four years in the making took another turn this past week, as the academic suspension of University of Ottawa Prof. Denis Rancourt prompted three students to sue UofO for up to $50,000 apiece in damages in relation to his removal. Four years ago Rancourt attempted what he calls “academic squatting,” — taking a course on physics and the environment in 2005 and drastically altering the curriculum with student input, outside university approval. One student complained, and the course was shut down. Rancourt then worked with the university to create a course in the science faculty on political activism, which would operate on a pass/fail basis: that too was cancelled.

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In Winter 2008, Rancourt returned to “academic squatting,” turning a fourth-year physics course into a forum for political activism, and assigning the mark of A+ to every student on day1. On Friday, February 6, according to the Canadian University Press, UofO administration recommended Rancourt’s dismissal to the university’s board of governors. Rancourt’s fate at UofO will be determined at a board of governors meeting in early March. In the meantime, two graduate students and a researcher are suing UofO for having their careers “frustrated and/ or derailed” by Rancourt’s dismissal. Students Sean Kelly and Joseph Hickey claim that their respective projects are entirely contingent upon Rancourt’s continued presence. In his absence, Meizhen Dang — a researcher with Rancourt for 12 years — also claims to have been given “no opportunity to continue her work independently” while “all of her ongoing projects, along with her research and data, have been seized by the defening university.” As of press time, the university had yet to be served with legal papers, according to UofO spokesperson Andree Dumulon. Anti-Semitism at York University

When a group of York University students gathered on Wednesday, February 11 to announce the acquisition of 5,000 signatures for their “Drop York Federation of Students (YFS)” campaign, they were met by students protesting the impeachment. And when fire regulations limited the number of people able to attend the public conference, those protestors created enough of a disturbance to shut the conference down, and place members in a position where police were needed to escort them out. According to the National Post, this disturbance first manifested in enough noise to disrupt operations in the original meeting room, at which point members moved to Hillel offices nearby. There, reports by CTV and Excalibur, York University’s student paper, noted that members were surrounded by protestors, who banged on the walls and ceiling below, shouting both antiIsrael and anti-Semitic slurs at members of the group. According to an Excalibur report available on YouTube (“Protest in York University’s Student Centre”), protesters suspected ulterior motives in the move to impeach the YFS. Krisna Saravanamutu, YFS VP Equity told Excalibur: “At the board meeting, members of Hezbollah Fellowship, members of Hillel, members of the Zionist Coalition at York University ... warned us outside of that meeting that if this motion gets passed, we will be impeached. ... What we’re seeing in the last two weeks is a result on our motion on Gaza.” The accusation stands in striking contrast to the reasoning for impeachment presented on the Drop YFS Facebook group, which reads: “By supporting CUPE 3903 and the strike, the YFS is responsible for prolonging the devastating strike that left 50, 000 students locked out of their classrooms. The YFS executive failed in representing its constituents, the students.” Hillel at York University President Daniel Ferman further responded to Saravanamutu’s accusations, stating that“the plans to have [YFS] recalled to an election were made in December. This has been in the works for months now, and this is a ridiculous accusation.” editor@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

News

Imprint, Friday, February 27, 2009

Katrina Massey reporter

Ivan Merrow reporter

British man, Ex-Guantanamo detainee alleges US torture

LONDON, England Binyam Mohamed, a 30-yearold Ethiopian citizen with British residency, was released from Guantanamo Bay after spending four years there and returned to the United Kingdom February 23. The United States agreed to release Mohamed after being pressured by the British government for over 18 months. He is the first detainee to be released since Barack Obama’s rise to presidency. Mohamed said that while he was in custody he was abused and tortured, and accuses the US government of co-ordinating this. “I have been through an experience that I never thought to encounter in my darkest nightmares,” he said. Mohamed was originally detained in Pakistan in April 2002, where he was held for nearly four months and allegedly tortured by Pakistani intelligence agents in the presence of a British agent. His lawyers say he was then taken to Morocco on a CIA flight in July 2002, where he was tortured and coerced into falsely confessing to terrorist activities. He was sent to Guantanamo Bay in 2004. Mohamed was accused of receiving Al-Qaeda training in Afghanistan and Pakistan, and of planning to detonate a bomb in the United States, but charges have since been dropped.

Both Morocco and the United States government have denied the torture allegations. However, the case has helped to increase controversy over American treatment of those accused of terrorist activities. “I am not asking for vengeance; only that the truth should be made known, so that nobody in the future should have to endure what I have endured,” Mohamed said. He also called for the release of other Guantanamo detainees. — With files from CNN and Reuters 9 killed, 84 injured in crash landing at Amsterdam airport

AMSTERDAM, The Netherlands Nine people were killed and 84 injured on Wednesday when a Turkish Airlines plane crashed just short of runway A9 at Amsterdam’s Schiphol international airport. The Boeing 737-800 wreckage remains in three pieces a few hundred meters short of the runway. The cause of the crash is still unclear, but is under investigation using flight data recorders recovered from the wreckage. The head of Turkish Airlines board of directors said the plane had been well maintained before departing Istanbul earlier that morning. According to Turkish Airlines chief Temel Kotil, the flight’s captain was experienced. An eyewitness report describes the plane hitting the ground tailfirst, after dropping out of the air at a 45 degree angle. One passenger named Kerem Uzel described the plane as, “…suddenly [descending]

a great distance as if [it] fell into turbulence.” Three crew members perished in the crash, including two pilots, while the remainder were passengers. The relatively small number of fatalities is being attributed to a soft landing surface and the fact that the plane did not catch on fire. Bill Voss, the president of the independent Flight Safety Foundation in Alexandria, Virginia said the Boeing 787-800 has a “very good safety record.” The plane is a relatively new model, and has quality flight data recorders that should reveal more information about the circumstances surrounding the crash. — With files from BBC and The Globe and Mail Deadly gas blast exposes China’s mining safety concerns

BEIJING, China A mine explosion that occurred on February 22 in China’s Shanxi province has killed 74 people and left many more wounded. 436 miners were working underground when the accident occurred, and although many were able to escape, at least 60 workers were trapped underground for hours awaiting rescue. 114 miners are currently being hospitalized, while five of them are in critical condition. The Tunlan mine is China’s big gest coal producer for the steel industry. Although the mine previously had a good reputation, having had no accidents in at least a decade, China’s mining industry is considered the most dangerous in

the world. Government figures show that almost 80 per cent of the 16,000 working mines in China are illegal. “Illegal production and cover-ups are still too frequent in the industry, and some local government and corporations remain ignorant of their responsibilities with regard to work safety,” said Luo Lin, head of China’s Work and Safety Administration. In 2007, 3,786 miners died from mine-related accidents, while in 2008 these numbers fell by about 15 per cent. This is partially because last year over 3,500 mining officials were examined and 425 were arrested for charges in relation to negligence that led to accidents. China’s State Administration of Work Safety estimates the death rate in mining accidents at just over one per cent. Ironically, the Tunlan mining accident occurred the day after senior provincial officials held a conference on mine safety, in which they pledged to end fatal mining accidents. — W ith files from BBC and Reuters Israel replaces head negotiator at Egyptian talks on Palestine

JERUSALEM, Israel Israeli Prime Minister Ehud Olmert has replaced his lead envoy to Egyptian truce talks with Hamas after previous lead Amos Gilad spoke out against the Israeli government’s approach to the negotiations. Gilad said that his government was inconsistent with their demands and accused the Prime Minister of hardly being involved in a February 18 article published by Maariv news-

paper, an attack that Prime Minister Olmert called unprofessional. Hamas has made demands for Israel to release 1,400 jailed Palestinians, while Olmert is now opting for the release of captured soldier Gilad Shalit. However, Hamas demands that Israel release 1,400 jailed Palestinians in exchange for Shalit. “Suddenly, the order of things has been changed. Suddenly, first we have to get Gilad (Shalit). I don’t understand that. Where does that lead, to insult the Egyptians? To make them want to drop the whole thing? What do we stand to gain from that?” Amos Gilad said. The attempts to solidify the January 18 ceasefire have also been made increasingly difficult as violence continuously occurs between Israel and Hamas. On February 23, Israel launched an air strike on Gaza after one of Israel’s patrols went under fire near the border crossing. A rocket was also launched from Gaza and hit Israel territory. There have been no reports of casualties or injuries from these attacks. — With files from BBC, IRIN and Reuters

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For this week’s Media Matters column, an important comment on the Crime on Campus series, see page 15

Economists, be compassionate Citing number games as an excuse to dismiss suffering is wrong eaboyeji@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

t took just one horrible equation to destroy my week — and that was not just because I have a natural aversion to calculation of any sort. Now, I have nothing against egg heads whose daily bread is crunching numbers. (In fact, I am jealous because God knows those time-tested number skills would have saved me a second $65 SAT registration fee and Father would think of me as less of an expensive idiot). Still, I think number-crunchers need to beware of the natural limits of math in real-world decision-making. To do any less in certain circumstances renders them cold blooded and insensitive elitists. The gripe I have with these cold -hearted number crunchers is not just the consistent attempts to put a price tag on a people’s suffering in the name of “cost-benefits,” but their heartless inclinations to dismiss these “costs” as necessary evils. Whatever their grand illusions of economic development might be, failing to realize that even the magic of numbers cannot justify poverty’s torture is in itself an original sin. One such “steely” equation that has become very popular among certain academics greatly upset me this week. It was made by a certain “internationally renowned” Zambian economist by the name of Dambisa Moyo. Armed with advanced degrees in policy and economics from Harvard and Oxford she seemed the kind of African woman one could look up to — until she started her number crunching. When she was asked by the New York Times about her new book “Dead Aid,” where she makes an increasingly popular (and credible) argument that Western Aid to Africa has perpetuated poverty, she gave this cold-hearted answer, which has lit me up this entire week: “Think about it this way — China has 1.3 billion people, only 300 million of whom live like us, if you will, with Western living standards. There are a billion Chinese who are living in substandard conditions. Do you know anybody who feels sorry for China? Nobody.” In the first place, that a billion Chinese people are living in substandard conditions is enough reason for the genuinely conscientious among us to worry. I am appalled that anyone gets the impression that China’s poor do not deserve attention. Even worse, to use this miserable, sadistic, and morally faux pas argument to advance a far more beneficial view to economic development in Africa is simply unforgivable. What particularly saddens me is that we share the same point of view — only, she gets to write her radical bullshit first. I agree, like many mainstream

African economists, that Western aid is currently not doing very much for Africa. No arguments there. The self-evident ills of the aid system and the solid case against its long term relevance to economic development in Africa are only a Google search away. You do the homework. However, my problem with this development economist is how lightly she dismisses and even attempts to justify the suffering of an entire third of the world (add China’s poor to Africa’s). Undoubtedly she thinks of the approximately two billion people she has fleetingly referred to in simple figures — figures she can crunch into calculations that are meaningless to the world’s poor. This policy experts’s outrage-worthy opinions did not stop with this collective “fuck you” to the world’s poor. She still had the moral courage to go even further to verbally attack people like Bono, who

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several years. Were we expecting she would even remotely consider that 65 per cent of her country lives on less than a dollar a day and a million people in her country are infected with HIV aids? So let’s complete Ms. Moyo’s epic tale as we are assured it will end: Dead Aid becomes a New York Times bestseller, she travels the world awing academics with her “novel” ideas on aid in Africa and she makes millions blindly promoting her questionable “freemarket” and “micro-credit” alternatives. It is the typical African success story: her silver spoon turns gold thanks to the continued misery of Africa’s poor. Now, there are three major problems with giving pseudo intellectuals like Moyo free rein to crunch numbers in ignorance suffering and pain. First, the comparisons they make are almost always wrong since they

She also does not even attempt to factor in her calculations that while China has a surplus of trillions of dollars, Africa has a collective debt almost three times China’s surplus.

(however misguided they are) have created small miracles in Africa with their well intentioned altruism. To crown it all, she advocates stopping all development aid, which still forms the more significant part of many an African governments’ yearly operational budget, within five years—with a phone call! When I read these grossly insensitive comments, I began to wonder. I asked myself, is this woman really African? Or has she been possessed by one of the stronger African blood-sucking demons? Is she, as we would say in Africa, a blood sucking witch? I wondered to myself how someone so educated and talented could possess such dangerously ignorant opinions. I did not have to look too far for answers. Towards the end of the interview she revealed to her interviewer the elitist background that had formed her mindlessly flawed number crunching. Her mother owns the influential Indo Zambian Bank that bankrolled the late President Mwanawasa’s funeral. Her father runs a Transparency International break away called Integrity Foundation that “trains” Zambia’s parliament instead of investigating the allegations against them. She marketed Israeli, Turkish and South African bonds on the global capital market for Goldman Sachs in London for

are apt to view a situation simply as a numbers game. Their lack of any real experience as far as concrete issues on the ground are concerned means that they often fail to look at the numbers that really matter. Take for example, Ms Moyo’s comparison of China’s poor to Africa’s. What she fails to tell you is that while more than half of Africa is living on less that a dollar a day, only 10 per cent of China faces the same fate. She fails to tell you that while China has performed the extraordinary feat of reducing this number by 50 per cent in the last decade, Africa managed to plunge it by 100 per cent in the same time. She also does not even attempt to factor in her calculations that while China has a surplus of trillions of dollars, Africa has a collective debt almost three times China’s surplus. So the one billion Chinese people she refers to are not as dirt poor as half an entire continent. All this is notwithstanding the fact that their highly educated General Committee is far from the collection of nut cases that lead Africa today. See NUMBERS, page 10

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Friday, February 27, 2009 Vol. 31, No. 28

Imprint, Friday, February 27, 2009 opinion@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

Opinion

Imprint, Friday, February 27, 2009

Commentary

Art of being a keener

he art of being a keener is no easy feat. While they are often mocked, ridiculed and resented by their fellow classmates, it takes a certain amount of character and guts to pull off that smug know-it-all attitude. For those of you itching to stand out in your lectures and become a suck-up extraordinaire, here are some core principles to bear in mind: 1. Never be afraid to ask an irrelevant question — absolutely key if you wish to succeed in annoying the entire class.

Yes, you may encounter a few eye-rolls and receive an “I’ll take care of you after class” glare from the varsity hockey player in the corner, but you must persevere; these simpletons are just jealous that they didn’t think of the question first. As professors are famous for saying, there is no such thing as a stupid question, and while your query may be awfully close, it’s far more important to have your voice heard. Moreover, in the long run your peers will thank you for broadening their knowledge of the subject because of your inane question and will feel more enriched as a result. In my Ethics in the Life Sciences class, we were discussing whether the fetus is really a person and one argument often invoked is that because they have DNA, they should be considered persons. One genius raised his hand to ask, “What about those ancient Native burial grounds where there’s DNA in the soil?” Boy was he an intellectual; clearly Native burial grounds and fetuses are the same thing and I thank him for making such an astute connection. 2. Personal stories best saved for family dinners are a keener’s best friend.

Does the lecture revolve around nursing homes? Throw in how your dear old grandpa is currently in one. Discussing ethical dilemmas and principles? Be sure to mention that quandary you

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found yourself in three years ago while working at Shopper’s Drug Mart. Try to work in your career ambitions, family history and your pet’s name if at all possible, as these are things that your classmates are dying to know. I could write a biography on some of my classmates because of all the fascinating tidbits they’ve imparted and although some may argue that these anecdotes unnecessarily prolong the class, I beg to differ. I personally would not be able to sleep at night if I hadn’t heard the heartwarming story of how one girl’s boyfriend is a great cook. 3. Office hours are for suckers.

One could argue that these off-

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quick, pressing question they need to ask, but pay them no attention. Building rapport with the prof (i.e. sucking up) is essential to achieving keener status. 4. Always wait until the last possible second — see what I did there?

I find questions are much more stimulating (and not at all annoying) when they are asked in the last few seconds of class, just as everyone is getting ready to leave. This extra time spent together with your peers will allow you to strengthen the deep friendships you have already formed. Parting really is such sweet sor-

row and though you may be on the receiving end of a few death glares, your classmates deep down appreciate your effort to spend more time together. And there you have it; a step by step guide to being the ultimate keener. While this status may entail in having fewer friends, cold looks from your classmates and a collective groan every time you raise your hand in class, there are benefits to be had. Namely, a glowing reference letter from the professor and the satisfaction of knowing that you have enriched the lives of fellow UW students, thereby making the world a better place. Pat yourself on the back. — Melody Jahanzadeh

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topic questions and personal tidbits are best saved for the professor’s office hours so that the entire class isn’t held up because of random questions. Nay, I say! Office hours are for commoners and a true keener is no commoner. Feel free to waste…er… use as much of the class time as possible. This way, you can ensure that not only will your peers take note of how brilliant you are, but you will stand out to the professor as well. This will prove invaluable when you go to them for that grad school letter of reference. Keeners are always two steps ahead of the game. That being said, have no shame when you go to the professor after class to chat about the day’s news. Yes, there may be a line of people who only have a

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Opinion

aving a fat day? Loving what you see in the mirror? Or are you impartial to the way you feel about yourself? There are two types of people in the world (three if you count the fakers). People who are confident and those who are not. In my experience, the most outwardly confident people are the ones who are the most concerned with themselves. At the same end are the noticeably self-conscious ones… who are even lower on esteem once you get to know them. If you were to ask my friends to describe me, I think (and hope) they would say that I am a confident person who has good direction. What they don’t know is that I am constantly

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Imprint, Friday, February 27, 2009

Self (un)conscious with the sexes I once dated a guy who was popular and funny, and seemed to have all the confidence in the world. He wasn’t the greatest looking guy, and he was relatively close to my height – but I still dated him because he had that something. Tom (not his real name) was hilarious, and was a musician in a local band that everyone loved. When we first met and started dating, I thought he was the best thing to happen to me. He always told me I was beautiful, and did the cutest things for me. He would surprise me with music and songs, write for me, and was trying to be the best boyfriend I had ever had. Eventually, the true colours of his low self-esteem started to come out.

that was the final straw. We had mutual friends when I broke it off with him, and I would hear the worst things about me from him. Within a week of a breakup, Tom, who once told me I was the love of his life, was telling everyone he wished I was dead. I could have avoided all of that if I had only known that he was a fake from the start. I know it sounds horrible leaving someone because they are sad, but that wasn’t the whole reason I broke up with him. I had to leave him, because I was starting to think like him. I didn’t leave him because he cried tears in front of me, or that he called himself fat – but because he never saw the light in things and it brought me down to a low I

they stay to help that person, or that they think “love is enough,” it pulls on my heart strings to see confident people waste away because of who they are dating. Not all the relationships I know are like this, and more often than not, they are positive, healthy ones. Which begs the question: where can we find the fine line of not enough confidence and too much confidence? When is it safe to show your true colours to someone? No one would ever start dating someone with “Hi, I think I am ugly and fat. Let’s get a coffee.” On the other hand, having too much confidence is a social death sentence, where people need to literally sit down and eat a slice of humble pie.

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notion of feminism has been blown grossly out of proportion. Feminism is now a negative and extreme word — to the point that girls stay away from it altogether. I don’t think women are better than men, I just think we are all equal — that’s my feminist belief. Whether you are a girl or guy, you need to have some confidence. Whether fake or real, it will help you along the way. I must caution you all though – that there will always be someone who will “one-up” you with confidence and know-all. Know when to step in and take control, and when to sit back and be a team player. The balance is the part that many people are not

No one would ever start dating someone with “Hi, I think I’m ugly and fat. Let’s get a coffee.”

worrying about my flaws, and I feel lost most of the time. You can filter me under the fakers, but like the old saying goes, “It takes one to know one.” I’ve been told that I look unwelcoming and cold at first glance, and that only after someone gets to know me do they think I am warm and kind. If I could choose, I would rather look like a teddy-bear than a female dog as far as first impressions go; unfortunately that is not my case. First appearances have lasting impressions until you get to know each other.

Not only was uber-confident Tom a fake, he was depressed, jealous, and sucked every bit of happiness and confidence out of me. He was at his lowest point at the end of our relationship, when I decided I needed to break up with him. He told me he thought he was too ugly to have someone like me, and that he thought I was too good for him. He said everything that you shouldn’t say to your girlfriend – and he did it in a record two months of dating. He told me he loved me before he even knew me, and

had never experienced. I was becoming increasingly bitter and miserable. I had to get out. Years after Tom and I broke up, I ran into him while in my hometown. He apologized to me for everything he did and said, and told me that he’s a better person now. I believed him, and I knew he was telling the truth because I knew that he was extremely successful in his funny line of work. Today, I am dating someone who doesn’t bring me dowm, yet I know many friends that are with significant others that only hinder them. Whether

People don’t like other people who think they are better than them. Call it politics or capitalism… everyone wants to be seen as successful, confident, and unique. No one likes a “one-upper.” When a girl has self confidence, and walks into a room with her head held high, the other girls in the room are the first ones to snicker and glare. Guys that walk into a room of people with confidence halt conversations and are glorified by the girls in the room (most of the time). Self confidence from a male is more accepted and encouraged than it is for a female. Sure, call me a feminist but like a colleague of mine, who also shares this belief, I think the

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aware of. What is it that brings out the claws from one successful girl at another? Is it the media? Is it our social conditioning? Why else would a soap company benefit from having a self-esteem campaign directed at children? Why else would twelve year old girls be reading women’s magazines that give tips on sex? Why do men feel that shedding a tear or holding a hand is unmanly? Social expectations of confidence and image are to blame. In our current society, if you lack confidence you are lower than the majority, however the most common fears and problems people have are with confidence. Such a paradox, isn’t it?

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Opinion

Imprint, Friday, February 27, 2009

Letters Re: Ask Shaniqua (20 February 2009) I have learned not to expect high-quality content from your publication, but this week’s “Ask Shaniqua” has hit a new low with the unfounded assault against the male population. In Shaniqua’s first letter, “Confused” talks about the fact that she cannot understand men, and wanted to know how she could tell if he’s not interested. In her response, Shaniqua proceeds to dehumanize men in general, saying that they are “rude, loud, smelly, stupid, and rarely do their actions make sense.” The tone of her article clearly suggests that these traits (specifically the first two and the last one) describe her more accurately than they describe the average male. I would expect her response to be more supportive in nature, and it is unfair for her to do so at the expense of half of the population. Her comment that women “are naturally superior to all men” is uncalled for. While I will acknowledge that women are sometimes treated unfairly compared to men, it will only hurt their cause to have someone who has the appearance of an authority figure loudly proclaim that one gender is better than the other. I was under the impression that we were through with this sexism debate and able to look beyond gender when judging one’s personality. Obviously, I was sorely mistaken. As for her suggestion that all men care about are video games and sex, I honestly don’t understand where she gets this rubbish! Yes, this may apply to a small subset of the male population, but the vast majority actually have a greater level of dignity. For many of my male friends, having a girlfriend is like taking another course, and I can tell that they’re into the relationship for more than just sex (assuming that’s even a part of it). These friends also have social lives outside of their girlfriends, and in many cases, gaming will rank very low on the list of priorities.

Finally, to say that “lesbians are the lucky ones” is questionable at best. While I am by no means an expert in homosexuality, I can say with some confidence that many lesbians feel out of place amongst a world of heterosexuals. If lesbians were indeed the lucky ones, would campus organizations such as GLOW be necessary? I’m sorry if Shaniqua has had bad luck with past boyfriends, but this does not give her the right to dehumanize the male population to the point that she did. If I were to write a similar article dehumanizing females, it would cause another wave of feminism on campus and I would certainly lose my positive reputation that I have worked hard to earn. For these reasons, I recommend suspending Ask Shaniqua until such a time when her articles meet basic publication standards. While I recognize that her opinions do not necessarily represent those of Imprint Publications, it still does not discount the fact that I, as well as many of my male friends, were appalled by this article and demand an apology in the next issue. Joseph Collins mathNEWS Editor Editor’s note: Must be nice in that Ivory Tower of yours, mathNews. Tell us, do you keep your “Sexy Whore” onsite, or just call her up for special occasions? Also charming was your flame-bait piece about Italian culture (what, Mario stereotypes weren’t bad enough?), and your publication’s rampant anti-Gothism (which we agree with in principle but are SHOCKED AND APPALLED by on record). Oh, wait, are we still recording? Abort! Abort! Sincerely, Imprint P.S. We saw your charge of war and have this to say: Bring it. P.P.S. Iron Warrior, you can come to. (We know you get lonely.)

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Opinion

Imprint, Friday, February 27, 2009

NUMBERS: blood and tears Continued from page 6

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Second, they have a highly unbalanced view of potential solutions. Again, Moyoâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s false assessment of the situation provides proof of this. When she was asked for an alternative solution to Africaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s problems given her extremist views, she gives the Westâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s foppish solution â&#x20AC;&#x201D; the free market. Now, I have nothing against the free market, even though it often does not work as well as advertised. However, in her rush to crunch numbers she fails to calculate the obvious risks of this free market rhetoric that Africa is now being beleaguered with. No doubt encouraging free enterprise is a valid approach to development but like every approach it has problems. One of these problems is that Africa has little of any value to sell in this â&#x20AC;&#x153;free market.â&#x20AC;? Agricultural goods are hardly profitable if you do not have a government that can subsidize recurrent losses (i.e France) and the oil market is winding down. It seems that only a viable manufacturing and services sector may be able to resurrect Africaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s economy. However, even manufacturing poses a significant problem as we cannot expect to compete in a global manufacturing market with Chinaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s edge. Services are all we have left and in a continent with Africaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s literacy problem, there is definitely no gimmick for this. We are looking to another generation for those solutions. Thus the question that I always throw at these â&#x20AC;&#x153;free marketâ&#x20AC;? types is simple; what can Africa sell in the free market? The other problem with this â&#x20AC;&#x153;freemarketâ&#x20AC;? town cry is it ignores that these markets have unacceptable costs. Take for example, a scenario that is now common in my home country Nigeria. In the name of the free-market, poor people are given micro-finance loans. These resourceful Nigerians take these loans and invest in the highly profitable sachet water business (ignore the fact that this water is polluted). All you need do is have the sachets, a sealing machine and water flowing from even the sewer. (Hint: you also have to bribe public officials for the regulatory agency approval. Now guess who does the hard work of hawking this sachet water every day, all day? The entrepreneurâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s school age children So impoverished parents do exactly what the â&#x20AC;&#x153;free marketâ&#x20AC;? people say, and start up a small scale sachet water manufacturing enterprise and staff it with their children instead of sending them to school. Apply the same business model to any other micro finance enterprises these free trade types promote and you have the same result â&#x20AC;&#x201D; the future of Africa is the cost for

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these â&#x20AC;&#x153;free marketâ&#x20AC;? adventures. So if the free market approach simply entrenches the poverty trap, how does it help Africa develop? Lastly and most important, these intellectuals in their arm-chair-approach to these problems indulge in the lazy long-distance thinking that makes them believe that the solution to a myriad of problems is a single equation. In this fallacious search for easy solutions they reduce a peopleâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s stories of struggle to statistics, turn pain into Ď&#x20AC;, and debase experiences so that they can form simple equations. It is unconscionable to make poverty a simple variable that we can increase and decrease at will. It is true, the road to a developed Africa will be hard and long. It will demand sacrifice and commitment especially since we have no slaves to trod on in achieving development. However, the sacrifice of suffering should only satisfy a great cause â&#x20AC;&#x201D; the free market is too vague a cause. This grossly overrated god of free market prosperity is simply too fallible and impotent to warrant the suffering of our blood and tears. The problem with these analysts is that they think that something that may not work is bad in itself â&#x20AC;&#x201D; they live in an all or nothing world. I know â&#x20AC;&#x201D; God knows, that aid has brought small smiles to peopleâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s faces; that well that would never have been built but for the EWB, the brick schools that would have never seen the light of day but for USAID, and the girls who can now go to school thanks to Oprah. We see these things and give thanks to God for these kind hearts. While we agree that aid might not be a sustainable way of economic development for Africa, denying that it helps in these small ways is living in bitter denial. Instead of asking donors to stop the aid altogether, we should ask them to focus their aid in a far more productive manner like in building good schools to ensure that Africaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s future is guaranteed. Arrogant and elitist academics like Moyo who stick it to kind hearted individuals from the developed world (however misguided they are) only do so because they cannot appreciate the difference such little acts of kindness make for poor Africans. Like Moyo, their affluence blinds them to the miracles of these small blessings born of conscientious individuals who only seek a better world but have little or no stake in it. Their opinions are chaff without the humility that only suffering can bestow. Unfortunately, Moyo is not alone in this despicable manner of academic foolery. I was born in the â&#x20AC;&#x2122;90s â&#x20AC;&#x201D; an era when the hawkish â&#x20AC;&#x153;development economistâ&#x20AC;? Jeffery Sachs made millions of dollars prescribing suffering for developing nations via the Structural Adjustment Program. Thus on a very personal level, Moyoâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s reasoning seems the worst kind of dĂŠjĂ vu â&#x20AC;&#x201D; the beginning of a very familiar horror movie. I remember the horror I experienced in my earliest years just because some Ivy educated white male told the government that to bring people out of poverty, you should drown them in it â&#x20AC;&#x201D; and the government, drooling fools that they are, believed him. In those years of the SAP in the early â&#x20AC;&#x2122;90s, my

father got laid off his job and being highly principled, refused to use the back door to get a new one. It was not like we led lives akin to the Wall Street professionals of today with larger than life SUVs, million dollar mortgages and fancy thousand dollar music and dance lessons. With both parents working, we were able to live quite modestly â&#x20AC;&#x201D; what you would consider middle class were it not a laughable concept by North American standards. We lived in a rented two bedroom apartment in a suburb hours away from Lagosâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; city centre so that my father would have to wake up at unholy hours to begin the voyage to work every morning. We could afford the most basic necessities, rent, the compulsory â&#x20AC;&#x153;Christmas cloth,â&#x20AC;? cereal every once in a while, baby food and with my fatherâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s almost insane insistence on quality education, private school. Hence, while we were not in the â&#x20AC;&#x153;dollar a dayâ&#x20AC;? category, we were not quite â&#x20AC;&#x153;balling.â&#x20AC;? Then the SAP came. My father and my mother got laid off from their civil service jobs due to â&#x20AC;&#x153;budget restructuring.â&#x20AC;? Life in the city became so difficult my father had to drive a taxi, my mother sold blocks of ice, and my parents had to buy my baby food from the supermarket on credit (a situation made worse by my innate aversion to breast milk). Our unwavering dedication to quality education suffered; we had to pull out of our costly private school. After months of this kind of suffering, my mother opted to take us back to her village. At least there, we could get food to eat from nearby farms and dairies. It seemed the best action to take in such depressing times. Some of the people we knew had resorted to begging as a means of substinence. Others became characters in my fatherâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s cache of horror tales from that era with the same story line: the breadwinners lose their jobs and feel hopeless; they become suicidal, take their own lives or, even worse, their families with them. As father is always apt to remind me whenever my privilege clouds my judgment, â&#x20AC;&#x153;but for Godâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s grace we would have ended up like them. It was God who gave us hope.â&#x20AC;? I concur. From time to time, I reflect on the images that defined an era of want for me â&#x20AC;&#x201D; experiences I do not wish, even for my worst enemy. I regretfully recall the grotesque images of my elder brotherâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s gaunt stick figure, brown hair and distended stomachâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;signs of kwashiorkor that had resulted from our far from balanced diet of yam flour. By grade five, he already had ulcer thanks to frequently imposed â&#x20AC;&#x153;hunger strikes.â&#x20AC;? I remember how I learnt to walk as toddler by hawking home-made cheese bare feet in village streets because the entire family would starve if we did not. On the other hand, I remember the more pleasant memories of our time at the village; how we played with my grandfatherâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s monkey, the many jibes the village children made of our â&#x20AC;&#x153;citiness,â&#x20AC;? and even the many times we were bullied because we lacked the other childrenâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s thick skin. In the ambivalence of conflicting feelings that flood my mind, I come to the firm conclusion: No one working â&#x20AC;&#x153;by-the-numbersâ&#x20AC;? can crunch this.

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Features

Imprint, Friday, February 27, 2009 features@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

Cultures abounding Dinh Nguyen | assistant editor-in-chief

ith a diverse demographic including international and exchange students from over 100 different countries, as well as first and second generation

Canadian born immigrants, UW has been celebrating its multiculturalism since the late 1980s. Last year, as part International Celebration Week, UW, through its One Waterloo campaign brought together 20 different groups and guest speakers to construct and perform lectures, multicultural fashion and talent shows, as well lunch parties and film screening. One of the highlight of International Celebration Week is the infamous Cultural Caravan event, in which ethnic talent is showcased through poetry, song, and dance. Last year several hundred seated viewers gathered in the SLC Great Hall for this event alone. International Celebration Week this year is titled “Bringing the World to UW.” The week long event starts March 2 and runs until March 6 and will host the following:

Monday, March 2 — 3 p.m. to 5 p.m. Lunch Party SLC Atrium Tuesday, March 3 — 11 a.m. to 2 p.m. International Presentations SLC Multipurpose Room Wednesday, March 4 — 7 p.m. to 9 p.m. Film Screening: The Italian MC 2065 Thursday, March 5 — 6:30 p.m. tp 12 a.m. Cultural Caravan SLC Great Hall Friday, March 6 — 8 p.m. to 1 a.m. Warrior Weekends SLC Great Hall

Above, participants of Cultural Caravan 2008 showcase their cultural diversity through song, dance and fashion.

photos by Rocky Choi

Features

Imprint, Friday, February 27, 2009

From bottom to top diversity of all Asians. The model minority myth leads to the understating of the plight of certain Asian ethnicities such as Laotians, Cambodians, and Hmong, which have education and income rates far lower than the general population. For example, only 7.7 per cent of Laotians held a bachelor degree compared to the general population average of 24.4 per cent, or the Chinese-American average of 50.2 per cent.

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excuses US society from careful scrutiny on issues of race in general, and on the persistence of racism against Asian Americans in particular.” Like many other minority groups, Asians faced considerable discrimination for many decades. But much of the stereotyping and discrimination faded as Asians rose in socioeconomic status and certain Asian groups surpassed Caucasians in education

that is present in many East Asian countries such as China, Korea and Japan. Asian families place greater emphasis and resources on education to get ahead, as compared to other ethnic groups. The effect of stereotyping Asians as a model minority might seem to valorize Asians, However as author Gordan H. Chang notes “Such a label one-dimensionalizes Asian Americans as having those traits and no other human qualities,

Like many other minority groups, Asians faced considerable discrimination for many decades. But much of the stereotyping and discrimination faded as Asians rose in socioeconomic status and certain Asian groups surpassed Caucasians in education and income rates.

With increasing social success and upward movement on the economic ladder, the media portrayal of Asians has also shifted. Once regarded as poor, uneducated peasants, Asians are now largely seen as studious, hard working, very docile and willing to fall in line. As modelminority.com writes, “While superficially complimentary to Asian Americans, the real purpose and effect of this portrayal is to celebrate the status quo in race relations. First, by over-emphasizing Asian American success, it de-emphasizes the problems Asian-Americans continue to face from racial discrimination in all areas of public and private life. Second, by misrepresenting Asian American success as proof that the US provides equal opportunities for Page those 1who conform and work hard, it PM

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and income rates. Why have East Asians succeeded despite a history of racial marginalization, whereas other ethnic groups have not achieved anywhere the same levels of socioeconomic success? The suggested answers to this are still somewhat controversial, some hypothesis include; the self-selecting hypothesis. Many Asians living in North America are relatively recent immigrants and come from a highly educated upper middle class background. Furthermore, many come from economically well-off places such as Japan, South Korea, Singapore, Taiwan, Hong Kong, etc, thus ensuring that they continue to be fairly well-off even after moving to North America. Other hypotheses include cultural factors such as the Confucian emphasis on education

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t was not too long ago that Asians living in North America were regarded primarily as backwards cheap labourers with funny accents. Laws such as the Chinese Exclusion Act were passed to keep the threat of “yellow peril” from permeating culture within the US and Canada. Japanese-Americans and Canadians were put in internment camps for fear of being outsider spies. But within the last generation, Asians have grown to become regarded as the model minority – a minority group that has achieved socioeconomic success greater than the population averages. Both the Eastern Asian block (Chinese, Korean, Japanese) and the Asian Indian groups have succeeded substantially in North American society despite attempts at marginalization. Asians have higher incomes than the population average, higher levels of education, and infiltrated into many white-collar jobs that were long regarded for the exclusive domain for the Caucasian majority. With this success brings along a common misconception that the Asian community embraces their “model minority status,” and that this status is a source of pride among Asians. While there are certainly some individuals in the community who might embrace being held up as a model minority, among the academia in Asian-American studies, there is a consensus that perception of being a model minority is probably detrimental to the community. There is a tendency among the general populations to lump Asians into one large amorphous group, categorizing Chinese, Japanese, Korean, Vietnamese, Laotian, Cambodian, Hmong, and others as one group rather than recognizing the ethnic AB_GENER06_imprint.qxd 3/29/06 8:48

such as vocal leadership, negative emotions, or intolerance towards oppression. Asian Americans are labeled as model minorities because they have not been as much of a ‘threat’ to the U.S. political establishment as blacks, due to a smaller population and less political advocacy. This label seeks to suppress potential political activism through euphemistic compliments.” Much like Jewish groups before them, Asians are currently regarded as the model minority. This label comes, however, with a double-edged sword: the Jewish population, for one, suffered anti-Semitism to an horrific extreme as a response to their minority’s success. Somewhat comparably, in southeast Asia, Chinese minority groups in Indonesia, Malaysia and Thailand have been the targets of violence and laws aimed at reducing their economic success.

Features

Imprint, Friday, February 27, 2009

The Saver’s Toolbox

you might score a decent amount of interest. High interest savings accounts are ideal because your money grows at a respectable rate, and you can access it at any time – no questions asked.

Yes, this one seems obvious — bank accounts are where it all begins. Even if yours seems empty all the time, believe it or not, different types of bank accounts behave differently. Try using these different account types for an added edge to your toolbox. One: The student-grade bank account. Definitely a must-have, these “student” accounts go by different names at different banks, but in general tend to have lower fees, and offer young scholars more freedom to make withdrawals. Two: The high interest savings account. As a “backup” or secondary account, there is nothing better than a perky high-interest savings account. These accounts are golden. Usually paying out a much higher interest rate than your standard bank account, this higher rate can be anywhere from 2 to 3 per cent * annually (interest rates are from February 21 2009). If you have a large amount of cash you’re about to pay tuition with, or have a large OSAP cheque waiting to be spent, leave the money as long as you can in your high interest account and

The next step up from fancy bank accounts is the world of financial products. Essentially, financial products are certificates you can buy that promise to earn you investment income over a set period of time. These savings vehicles usually aren’t as accessible as your average bank account, so they require a bit more pre-deposit planning. Each type of product has a different earning potential, and carries a different level of risk (risk being the potential to lose your investment, or have it shrink in value). As a rule of thumb, the more risky an investment is, the higher its earning potential – although this is not true in all cases. Financial products include GICs, mutual funds, bonds and stocks. Now let’s take a look to see how they’re different. GICs or Guaranteed Income Certificates lock in your money for a specific amount of time, and guarantee you income, just like the name says. Often there is a minimum amount of money required to buy a GIC, and the amount varies depending on which one you want to buy. The incubation period required could be anywhere from 90 days to 5 years – the longer your money is locked away, the higher the interest rate you earn. When the time is up, your GIC is considered “matured,” and you can have your money back, plus interest. Risk is so low with GICs that the interest offered may not be competitive with other investment options available. On the upside, rates won’t fluctuate like your bank account’s interest rate will, because a guarantee is a guarantee.

ust like a carpenter might struggle to build a solid house without a hammer, nails, and a good measuring tape, a great saver can’t be expected to accomplish much without some tools of their own. Using the right investment tool makes your money work for you, instead of you being forced to work hard for your money. The tough part is leaving your money alone for long enough to let it really grow. With nothing but patience, you could see your money double or even quadruple itself. Getting down to brass tacks, here are some options for decking out your saver’s toolbox in chrome.

Bank accounts

Financial products

Bonds are very similar to GICs, only they are slightly more risky. By buying a bond, you are essentially lending money – and that means there is a tiny chance you might not be paid back. This is rare, but if your bond seller goes bankrupt, you’re out of luck. Depending on where you buy the bond from, the risk level can vary. Buying Canada Savings Bonds is one thing, but buying bonds from Iceland while it’s trying to stay afloat is another story. Again, the interest rates usually spell it out – if it pays higher than your high interest savings account, think hard about the risk before you buy in. Mutual funds are another slightly risky option that also offers higher earnings potential than the relatively safe havens of GICs and bonds. Buying “units” of a mutual fund means your money is invested by a mutual fund manager across many different businesses or industry sectors. By spreading out your money so thin, your investment is more protected from risk, and your earnings are not predetermined like they are in bonds and GICs. Instead, the better your fund performs, the more money you earn. Mutual funds can shrink in value, but they are supposed to be less volatile than stocks. The one drawback is that there are annual fees for having a mutual fund manager move your money around — even when they are on a losing streak.

Stocks Arguably the power tools of your saver’s toolbox – stocks are potentially high-yield investment, but can be dangerous if used carelessly. Buying stock in a company means you own a tiny portion or “share” of that company, which is expected to grow in value as the company grows. There are many unpredictable factors that influence the value of a stock – so many that it makes

stocks a risky investment. Any piece of bad news can send your company’s stock tumbling, and if the bad news is bankruptcy you lose your investment entirely. Many fortunes have been lost because of stock market volatility and excessive risk taking, but the potential for big gains always seems to lure more people in. Huge profits can be made in shorter amounts of time than any bond or mutual fund, but playing the market always runs the risk of a stock market crash. Each time you buy or sell a stock you are also charged a trading fee, so even if you make a sweet sale you still have to cover your trading costs to make money. Instead of trading, holding on to some stocks literally pays dividends, meaning that your company pays you a part of their earnings every three months as a reward for holding their stock. Over time, this can really add up. To minimize risk, some people advocate purchasing many different stocks, or “index funds,” which are stocks that buy mini shares in whole lists of corporations. Essentially, index stocks are mutual funds without the manager – you are buying one of everything, so your risk is minimal. Above all, it’s important to know that trading stocks in general is a risky business, and something to think long and hard about before you get into. Now that you have a better idea of how to equip your saver’s toolbox for the future, it’s time to get back to saving those dollars and cents for your next investment. If you’re not sure which one is right for you, talking to a financial advisor can help you plan your next move. By using the right set of tools, it’s easy to lay a solid foundation and build a financial shelter that’s going to last through good and bad times. Best of luck, and always plan carefully before you tool up.

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Why crime on campus Part 1: A history of student crime Part 2: Stealing

Part 3: Public & property incidents

Maggie Clark editor-in-chief

hen we started the Crime on Campus series last week, we made one serious omission: an introduction to the series — its relevance, why we chose to run it, and what you can look forward to reading in the weeks to come. While previous serial reporting at Imprint has been somewhat self-explanatory, highlighting the ins and outs of student government, or asking the question, “How Green Is My Campus?”, there are some inherent assumptions about the purpose of crime reporting even in mainstream media, and we at Imprint were remiss in failing to address some of the most prominent ones — especially as student journalism is often perceived with its own, difficult-to-overcome prejudices about quality and use. For one, while it’s bad enough that publications like Time and Macleans can sometimes present issues of community safety in ominous, shockvalue overtones, it’s almost a given that a student publication, full of student reporters, is going to be itching for the opportunity to present a polemic, sensationalized accounting of crime on campus. Brace yourself, then, for pieces that intrinsically call out the administration and police as unrepentant “baddies,” and accounts of criminal activity on campus that make first years tremble to leave their residences! No, of course not — that would be reckless and harmful to our main readers, the students, as well as the community in which we operate. But from our approach last week, it’s fair to have these misgivings. So let us instead set some minds at ease, and deliberate a moment on what we will be striving to accomplish in the coming weeks instead. Raising awareness:

Awareness comes in two forms, where crime reporting is concerned: First there is the awareness of potential threats, ongoing dangers, and related problems, such as communication breakdowns, in any community. These — and especially the former two — are often the easiest and most prolific of awareness-based crime pieces. But these are never meant to exist in isolation, for when they do what emerges is a “culture of fear,” with readers taught to anticipate danger around every bend. This is where the second half of awareness comes in: awareness of context. Yes, something might be dangerous — but how dangerous? Relative to what? TV journalism often eschews this kind of reporting to drop teasers, like “Something in your grandmother’s medication might be harmful for her—find out what on the six o’clock news!” The problem is that if you don’t tune into the news at six, where we can only hope moderation is used in relating all but the most pressing stories, all that lingers in your mind is this sense of imminent danger without restriction, without context. This is not good journalism — and while we cannot ensure perfection, rest assured it’s not the kind of journalism we intend to pursue in these pages. This is especially true because awareness-raising, when it comes to campus crime, has just as much to do with individual behaviour patterns as it has to do with the existence of a criminal “other.” UW students especially, so geared towards self-reliance, should understand the importance of selfreflection before turning on others in the community. A good example of this arises this week, in our deliberations on one aspect of student culture that often stands at odds from the business models present in the world at large: Our engagement with, and pointed avoidance of, copyright law. But there are others: Time and again small bylaw infractions can heap up in the homes of some university students — creating a bad reputation for students in general (even the responsible ones) with the community at large. Being aware of these smaller, still environment-damaging infringements is just as important as learning that your belongings might be at risk in a library, or on a bike rack, on campus. And this more well-rounded approach to awareness is the route we at Imprint will pursue. Creating meaningful dialogues

Part 4: Drug culture facts & fictions Part 5: Violent crime

Part 6: Hate crime, and security cultures

Above and beyond awareness-building, perceptions of safety — and of the communities that enhance our safety — play a huge role in the presentation of good crime reporting. This is an especially difficult matter because often we arrive at beliefs about police quality, or administration concern, from anecdotal evidence, pre-existing skepticism, and some measure of ignorance about what is and isn’t feasible in either realm. Beyond these possible prejudices, though, there may be a very real need to convey and deal with student concerns about either institution’s efficacy. In this case, what’s the best way to go about highlighting lapses in service, or room for improvement, without ostracizing or demonizing any of the major players we want those better relations with? The answer is simple in theory, though a little more daunting in practice: Always, always, always present fair comment — that is, give everyone the opportunity to respond to allegations or criticism, and to present their perspectives openly, without editorialization. And while this is the underlying rule of all good journalism, considering the bumpy start of this series to date, and the breadth of topics to be covered in only a few short issues, we would especially like to issue the following words of encouragement to everyone who has something they want to say about their exposure to crime and safety-related issues in this community — whether from the perspective of a citizen, or operating within a position of safety or peace enforcement: please, write in. We won’t get everything perfect at the start — this is just the nature of writing a “first draft of history” — but we strongly feel that the issues presented in this and coming weeks, about crime and safety at UW, as well as in student culture in general, deserve to be aired and discussed. As with every element of student life at this institution, open dialogue is our greatest tool for cultural reform. So if we can even set these conversations in motion, we hope you, our diligent readership, will be there to supply the rest. editor@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

THEFT

&YOU

Part 2: Stealing James Damaskinos staff reporter

magine you are studying at the Dana Porter Library. You set up your laptop computer in a cubicle and get down to business. After studying for a grueling two hours, you decide to head to the CnD on the main floor and grab a quick coffee. You get back to your cubicle and the brand new $1300 MacBook you just bought is gone. What do you do? Who do you call? What happens now? Theft is one of the most pervasive crimes on or off campus. Chances are you have had something stolen from you in your lifetime or at the very least you know someone who has been the victim of theft. If you are not careful, it can easily happen to you. If you have chosen to commit theft, the consequences can be significant. Students who have had their goods stolen happen to know that you lose far more than just material possessions. Chris Proctor and Justin Tisi were roommates at Conrad Grebel in Winter 2005 and were both victims of theft during that term. The pair had been running a small business out of their rooms in which they sold chips, candy and chocolate to the other students in the residence. They had mutually decided to leave their door open for students to have access to their business while they were studying or attending lectures. “Chris and I were running the pop shop for Grebel out of our room, which basically meant that our room was always open,” Tisi told Imprint. “One day, I had come back from class mid-afternoon to find that my laptop was gone.” Naturally, the loss of his laptop was met with considerable shock and anxiety. “As far as I remember, my reaction after that was the feeling that it, and all of the value it represents, was just gone and that I would need to find… a suitable replacement. Naturally, I might

have said this in much more vulgar terms at the time,” Tisi said. After hearing about the loss of Tisi’s laptop, Proctor decided it would be best to invest in a laptop lock to ensure that his laptop would not be stolen even if they left their door open. “…that night Chris went to buy a laptop lock to tie his laptop down to his desk,” Tisi said. “But the next day, we had found that Chris’ laptop was also stolen and the laptop lock had been cut and taken with the laptop.” Both Proctor and Tisi reported the loss of their laptops to UW Police Services immediately. Unfortunately, the police were unable to track down the thief and return their stolen laptops. “I reported my theft to campus police and they said if they found out anything they would let me know,” Proctor said. “I didn’t hear anything back from them and had to survive the rest of the term without a personal computer.” “Chris and I reported our missing laptops to Campus Police and they came by and talked to Chris while I was in class. The message I got… was that there was really very little chance of tracking down the laptops or the thieves,” Tisi said. “We gave the police the serial numbers for our laptops in case they appeared in a pawn shop, but that never happened.” An overview of theft at the University of Waterloo

Daniel Anderson, the director of UW Police Services, said students at the UW are in a favourable position. According to Anderson, incidents involving criminal activity and theft on campus are relatively low. “UW Police keeps statistics on all crime on campus,” Anderson said. “It should not come as a surprise that amount of crime in general, and specifically theft, is quite low at UW considering our population. We are all

fortunate to live in a safe environment.” Anderson stated that the UW Police have charged a number of people with theft in 2008; most of the people charged were not students at the university. “Throughout 2008 we charged a number of people with thefts that occurred on campus. Although some of the people charged were from the UW community, most were from off campus,” Anderson said. “UW police works closely with Waterloo Regional Police in our attempts to identify suspects. We also have an excellent relationship with WLU Special Constable Service that assists in identifying suspects who target both campuses.” Students charged with theft under $5000 will not only face legal penalties, but could also face academic repercussions. The University of Waterloo reserves the right to exact academic consequences on students who have been charged with criminal activity on campus. These consequences can significantly hinder your academic career. “Although the maximum penalty for theft under $5,000 is two years imprisonment that would be reserved for someone with a very extensive criminal record,” Anderson said. “For a person charged with theft where it is a first offence, a period of probation and an order for restitution would be a typical penalty. “UW has authority to impose penalties for academic and non-academic transgressions. There have been situations where a criminal charge is laid and non-academic sanctions have been imposed. They are not mutually exclusive.” Preventative measures

Students who take preventative measures into account can deter potential thieves from taking their goods. Primarily, students must not take the safety of their goods for granted. You can lose your laptop at a moment’s notice should you leave your possessions unattended. If you need

staff reporter

pLAGIARISM pLAGIARISM

Crime on campus

Amy LeBlanc

to take a bathroom break, or grab a quick coffee, inform a friend that you will be leaving for a moment and ask them to make sure nothing happens to your property. If there is no one around, taking your material possessions with you is a suitable solution. Although packing and unpacking your laptop may be time consuming, it is far better to be safe than sorry. “Laptop computers, purses and backpacks account for half of the theft reports we receive. Almost all were left unattended, making them an easy target for thieves. Students need to be aware of their surroundings and take measures to protect their property,” Anderson said. “Even in areas like the library, if you are leaving your… work space only for a moment, either take your property with you or get someone to keep an eye on it.” Recording your laptop’s serial number is crucial. Having your laptop’s serial number recorded ensures that the police will be able to return the laptop to you, assuming it is recovered. “It is extremely important to record the serial numbers of electronic devices such as laptop computers,” Anderson said. “Without that number, it is almost impossible to identify one laptop from another.” “If I could do it all over again I would be a little more careful,” Proctor said. “My roommate and I locked our doors when we weren’t in the room for the remainder of our time in residence without any further incidents.” In order to ensure the safety of our property and our campus, students and faculty need to take the necessary measures. “We all have a role maintaining a safe and secure environment on campus,” Anderson said. “By taking steps to protect our possessions and reporting suspicious activity we make our community better.” jdamaskinos@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

ince the 01/02 academic school year the number of cases of academic dishonesty at the University of Waterloo has more than doubled. Sure, we can credit the rise of the use of internet and the expansion of publicly-accessible data for much of the plagiarism at UW, but what about other accusations of cheating that have nothing to do with the internet? Unauthorized collaboration

Most of the cases that have jumped in occurrence rates throughout the years are not the “traditional” kinds of cheating, such as smuggling study notes into exams, tests, and midterms, but rather “unauthorized collaboration” on assignments. These cases mostly occur in the math, accounting, engineering, and science departments, and rarely in any areas of the humanities. Is there really that large of a gap between what is considered academic dishonesty in an English class and a math class? How is it that English students are not only permitted to have fellow classmates proofread their essays but are encouraged to do so, while math students are charged with academic dishonesty if they help each other on assignments? Bruce Mitchell, Associate Provost Academic and Student Affairs, believes that a comparison like this is “apples and oranges to a certain extent. Part of the challenge is that the faculty members are exploring alternative ways of learning. Trying to get the students more engaged by encouraging collaboration and group work ... has the upside of enhancing learning but also creates some opportunities for misunderstandings or people going ‘too far’ in terms of appropriate collaboration. In that regard, the onus is very much on the faculty members to make it very clear as to what it is that is acceptable and appropriate for their course. The challenge for the university is that it’s very difficult to prescribe and say ‘well, this is the kind of collaboration that is acceptable and this kind isn’t’ because there are so many different contexts as you move away from the humanities.” The Office of Academic Integrity at UW requires professors to include a note on avoiding academic offences on their course outlines, but other methods that professors can offer to their students to avoid academic offences are only suggested, not required. One of these suggestions includes allowing students in these faculties the option of citing their collaboration efforts as sources (including classmates, tutors, teaching assistants and professors) on their assignments, however, this idea remains only a suggestion as the Office of Academic Integrity has not implemented this as a general rule. Mitchell explains that he doesn’t “think the University would ever want to say to a faculty member there’s only one way to do this. [Rather,] there are some choices and here’s some examples of how it could be done”. Mitchell’s not alone in this thinking: at least one math professor agrees that “citing sources is a good thing to do, but there should still be leeway for professors to do things differently.” Clear as mud

It seems all well and good to leave the details of academic integrity to the discretion of the professor and the individual needs of a class, but what if the professor is not clear? In the 05/06 academic year an astonishing 86 students from just one class were accused of plagiarism. In cases with numbers like these the question arises about the clarity of the professor’s expectations regarding academic integrity, and his or her ability to help and support students. One UW student’s reasoning is that “the University of

Waterloo is protecting their own...they’ve invested a lot of their time and money into this person they’ve hired so if they’re not living up to the [public’s] expectations it reflects badly on institution...UW is supposed to be a school with high standards...[and] it’s easier to blame the student.” On the flipside, if a student is unclear about a restriction, does some onus not lie on that student to pursue clarity, rather than risk dishonesty? Clearly responsibility lies between at least two parties: the professor and the student. Only the precise division remains in question. Cheaters

So let’s find our way back to where we started and where we can all agree that cheating is wrong. But it would seem that this definition is changing or losing its weight since more and more students are cheating. One UW student admits that “it’s so easy to cheat. I think it’s ridiculous. Not even on essays, but on tests and assignments too. I think it’s really common.” Throughout the course of this investigation it became clear that cheating is a persistent, and sadly wide-spread sub-culture in student life. The wrongly accused

So what about students who want to achieve their marks honestly, as a measure of their hard work, but stand accused of academic dishonesty anyway? One student who believes that she was wrongly accused of plagiarism spoke to Imprint about the difficulties of clearing her name (or rather, her transcript) of this dark mark. During the 06/07 academic year Cameron* (name has been changed to protect the student’s identity) was accused of plagiarizing her final essay. The professor accused her of using online sources that she didn’t cite but Cameron insists that “she called me out on websites I hadn’t even seen before...everything was correctly cited [to other sources].” Cameron’s professor showed her the websites and she admits that “yes, they had the same ideas but I got my idea from combining two separate passages from two separate texts...I came up with that idea, I didn’t know it already existed.” In Cameron’s case, the academic dishonesty mark was eventually removed from her transcript, but she received a mark of zero on her essay (worth 50 per cent of her final grade), meaning that her transcript now shows that she failed that class. Cameron is currently applying for post-graduate studies and is often questioned on the reasons for her failure. “Even though the University of Waterloo erased the stamp of ‘academic dishonesty’ they never withdrew or retracted their claim [of plagiarism].” Imprint was directed to Associate VP Academic Geoff McBoyle in its search for cases of UW withdrawing a claim of academic dishonesty once it is brought to the attention of the Associate Dean. McBoyle unfortunately could not be reached for comment before press deadline. How to avoid it

The easiest way to avoid academic offences is to be careful in reading and adhering to the guidelines set out by the Offices of Academic Integrity at the University of Waterloo. Cameron has a few suggestions of her own: “develop relationships with professors to let them know that you’re reliable...discuss your ideas and research with them before [writing your essay] so they know that your ideas are your own.” Mitchell also reminds that students can “informally raise [issues] with professors...after that there’s the Associate Chair of Undergraduate Studies, the Chair of Undergraduate Studies, and the Dean. There are places that people can go if they have concerns and they don’t feel they’re...getting clear [or] appropriate guidance.” aleblanc@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

For more information... > UW student discipline policy (including a more thorough definition of plagiarism): http://www.adm.uwaterloo.ca/infosec/ Policies/policy71.htm

student life & Copyright FAQ, care of UW: www.lib.uwaterloo.ca/ copyright/index.html Maggie Clark editor-in-chief

ith Federal elections completed and possible parliamentary reshufflings trounced, the spectre of Bill C-61, Canada’s copyright reform act, again looms large. Canadian Heritage Minister James Moore spoke on Monday, February 9 about the revisiting of this bill, first tabled last spring, and expected to emerge again in the fall session. Also behind the project is Industry Minister Tony Clement. Last spring Imprint highlighted some of the problems the bill represented for students and student consumers — specifically, “anti-circumvention” clauses that heavily restrict what users can do with content they have bought and paid for (that show you TiVo’d? has to be watched and deleted in a timely fashion), while limiting library access to online materials and restructuring how students on campus can share in university-wide copyright permissions. But perhaps more importantly, that article, from June 27, 2008, highlights the student response: a Facebook group with some 80,000 members at the time protesting the new legislation, as well as word from Stephen Weber, Spring 2008 President of Waterloo Students for the Information Commons, about how the upper limit of possible fines — $20,000 in personal liability — and the bill’s restrictions on creative use, as in remixing, of existing content had the potential to curtail innovation and growth. Even Prof. Michael Geist, the Canada Research Chair in Internet and E-Commerce Law, and noted critic of Bill C-61, has more praise this time around for Prentice and Clement’s better understanding of digital culture, but regardless of the goings-on of federal government, there will always be an ongoing discourse on law, and our perceived responsibility to it, among student culture like no other. No, we might not all gather for conversations on the legality of staging a movie night with a downloaded film, or watching cable TV shows online, or copying more than a chapter (or 10 per cent) of a work from Dana Porter for our own notes, or ripping music and pass it off to friends. But every time we engage in these activities, all of which are done in violation of

at least the spirit of legislation or policy — a term often used is the “fairness” principle — if not also the letter of the law. Of course, we won’t always do this consciously. Did you know, for instance, that by UW’s copyright policy it is permitted to show visual content you don’t have permissions for on a powerpoint presentation in class, but printing out any of those slides for distribution is in violation of the rules? I would wager the distinction had not occurred to most; and why would it? Of all the infractions we commit, how many are done so to spite the artists or authors who created the work to begin with? (Thwarting industry middle-persons is another matter.) If the copyright bill debacle highlighted any real reasons, they might be listed as follows: The greater proliferation of cultural memes

Whatever it is — a TV show, a song, a YouTube video, a stirring blog post, we want in on it, and in this age of heightened technological engagement, the distinction between free and at-a-cost content becomes obscured. With tremendously powerful short films, music videos, and literature arising from free online sources, what makes a media item merit its cost? Yes, some materials cost more to make — and journalism especially has hidden costs to content copied around the world — but ours is a forward-looking generation: we’ve come so far already, how can we not anticipate a world where all media can be made on a moderate budget? 2) Easing the creative process

If ever works were thought to be distinct, to stand apart from everything else in a cultural discourse, that concept has been blasted to shreds by contemporary technology. Now every song, video, news article, blog post, photograph, has the potential to become transformed by another hand. And certainly, this creates new frameworks of ownership — flamewars erupt all over the internet for the “theft” of personally-designed user icons — but generally, we see pieces like Shepard Fairey’s iconic Obama poster, a re-envisioning of a photo taken by Associated Press

reporter Manny Garcia, as par for the course in contemporary society. A sense of complete ownership over what we do choose to buy

When the iPhone first emerged on the marketplace, a discourse arose immediately around ways to “unlock” the device, so users who paid $600 for the phone could then have the privilege of applying it to a network of their choosing. And yet copyright legislation generally favours the companies, in terms of discouraging user rights to attach a piece of hardware in their possession to whatever network they wished (and also, the privilege to turn their iPhones into bricks, as the process for unlocking an iPhone involved many delicate steps that could render the device entirely useless if not done properly). When our generation buys goods today, what exactly are we buying, and what do we feel we are entitled to own if we deign to “play by the rules” in the first place? All of the above questions are answered on a day-to-day basis in our actions, and in general, we are never confronted with dire consequences for abuses of societal regulation. Within the university community, some residence networks will temporary suspend accounts caught with active downloading platforms like LimeWire, but even that restriction lacks much in the way of follow-through. In a broader sense, horror stories about copyright legislation in the U.S. — which has seen striking cases like 12-year-olds sued for illegal downloading — understandably make Canadians, and especially Canadian students, about possible crackdowns on a grey area of law that we are presently more than content to negotiation on the basis of our own needs, desires, and sense of ownership alone. Meanwhile, UW offers comprehensive materials that, far from threatening students, provide a clear picture into what permissions are and aren’t given to the use of multimedia in an academic setting (see link above). Whether, and how, we choose to follow those rules is then a matter, unsurprisingly, we elect to take into our own hands. editor@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

Campus Bulletin UPCOMING Friday, February 27, 2009 The Fine Arts Film Society presents “Classics of the Asian Erotic Film series – Sex and Zen” 7 p.m., ECH 1220. Free. Must be 18+years of age. February Swing Dance – 315 Weber Street, N., Waterloo. Beginner lessons at 8:30 with dancing from 9:15 onwards. Info at www.waterlooswing.com. Tuesday, March 3, 2009 Healthy Active Promotion Network presents The HAPN Great Race at 6 p.m. Registration will be in the SLC from 10 a.m. to 3 p.m. on February 24, 25 and 26. Teams of two compete in a race across campus, going to different check points and figuring out all the indoor tunnels around campus. Wednesday, March 4, 2009 “Mourning the Unborn Dead” – a Budhist ritual comes to America – an enlightening talk by Dr. Jeff Wilson of Religious Studies, to mark the release of his latest book. Join us at Renison College, Great Hall Extension at 2:30 pm. A free event. Thursday, March 5, 2009 Laurier celebrates International Women’s Day from March 5 to 8. Great stories, panel discussions and film will be presented throughout the three days. RSVP Sharline Doss at sdoss@wlu.ca or www.wlu.ca/eship. Friday, March 6, 2009 The Fine Arts Film Society presents “Classics of the Asian Erotic Film series – Motel Cactus” 7 p.m., ECH 1220. Free. Must be 18+years of age. Saturday, March 21, 2009 Homer Watson House and Gallery is pleased to present a bus trip to Canada Blooms in Toronto from 8:45 a.m. to 5 p.m. For more info www.homerwatson. on.ca or 519-748-4377.

Friday, March 27, 2009 The annual commemoration of the UN international Day for the elimination of racial discrimination at Kitchener City Hall at 8:30 a.m. Wednesday, April 1, 2009 2009 Autonomous Racing Challenge – build autonomous robots – race for first prize of $500 to $1,000. Early registration deadline April 1, 2009. For details www.RobotRacing.org. Sunday, May 3, 2009 “Walk to Remember 2009” – Bereaved Families of Ontario-Midwestern Region. 9 a.m. registration at Waterloo Memorial Recreation Centre. Lots to do from silent auction to children’s activities and prizes! For info 519-8948344 or www.bfomidwest.org.

ANNOUNCEMENTS Exchanges for undergraduates and graduates – 2009-2010 academic years: MICEFA, Paris, France and the Chinese University of Hong Kong internal deadline: March 17, 2009. For info and application forms please contact Maria Lango, International Programs, Waterloo International, Needles Hall 1101, room 1113, ext 33999 or by email: mlango@uwaterloo.ca. General casting call – independent filmmakers looking for acting talent, full cast, extras and potential crew members. Contact Black Cloak Entertainment at casting@blackcloak.ca. Tune in to Sound 100.3 FM radio to hear DJ Cool with lots of music, entertainment, helpful info, weather and more. www.soundfm.ca >listen or www. ckmsfm.ca. “Rime of the Ancient Mariner” opens Valentine’s Day until March 10 at the Barber Gallery, 167 Suffolk Street, W., in Guelph. 519-824-0821 for info.

STUDENT AWARD & FINANCIAL AID

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Imprint, Friday, February 27, 2009 ads@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

and winter terms. Last day to submit Full-Time Bursary/Award Application for winter only term.

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Attention Cambridge School of Architecture students! Live conveniently and comfortably right across the street from school in this beautifully renovated apartment. 4, 8 and 12-month leases available with excellent signing bonuses and rental incentives! Call Joanne at 519-746-1411 for more details. Graduate housing: on-campus suites and apartments available now and May 1 at St. Paul’s College. Apply online: www.stpauls.uwaterloo.ca. For more information call 519-885-1460, ext 212.

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SP-100 Forest Firefighting course to be held in Kitchener/Waterloo, Ontario March 11-15, 2009. Registration limited to the first 32 applicants. Course will be held during evening hours during the week. To register, please call Wildfire Specialists Inc., 2233 Radar Road, Suite 5, Hanmer, Ontario, P3P 1R2. Toll free 1-877-381-5849. Ontario Ministry of

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Arts & Entertainment

Imprint, Friday, February 27, 2009 arts@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

He loves you, he loves you not

Combine lessons from the movie, He’s Just Not That Into You, and advice from the AC relationship experts and you get a how to find a good guy guide Phuong Tram reporter

onfess? Or not to confess? That is the question. Many people hold back their feelings and watch their love opportunities pass them by. While others pour their hearts out to that special someone despite the outcome.It’s hard to read people’s minds, especially when they give you mixed signals, as the movie He’s Just Not That Into You movie points out: “If a guy treats you like he doesn’t give a s--- it’s because he doesn’t give a s---.” “If you can find him, then he can find you. If he wants to find you, he will.” “Just because you like to lead doesn’t mean he wants to dance. Some traditions are born of nature and last through time for a reason.” “What if you meet the love of your life? Are you supposed to let that pass you by?”

After watching the premier of He’s Just Not That Into You and another Valentine’s day has passed. I’ve decided to do some research to help women identify obvious signs that man shows when he’s not that into you. As heartbreaking as it may sound, knowing sooner rather than later can save you from torment and anguish. And here are the results to help you stop wasting your time, wondering if he really is into you or not. According to relationship experts from AC Life style your “Could be Mr. Right could fall under one of the following categories: Mr. Honeymooner, Mr. Flake, Mr. Player, or Mr. Afraid of Commitment. Whatever his style, he’ll leave you confused, frustrated and wondering what’s really going on in his mind. So, let’s look for clues for when a guy simply is not that into you. The physical signs He avoids eye contact, his body is positioned away from you and his arms are folded tightly over his chest. He doesn’t encourage conversation or volunteers to express himself. He maintains his distance. The emotional signs When a guy is into you, he’d let you know how he feels when he is sure that you feel the same way. If he can’t do that, start re-assessing why you are still with him. Types of guys to avoid

He ignores or shows you disrespect If he ignores you or disrespects you by putting down your values, thoughts and ideas, he’s just not interested in you or in a serious relationship with you. Don’t waste your time move along and put your focus on someone who deserves it.

Armel Chesnais

Mr. Honeymooner Early in the relationship, it seems too good to be true. Mr Honeymooner will starts off real aggressively smooth, hot and heavy. He can’t see you often enough, calls all the time and tells you how much he misses you. He’s so romantic,

thoughtful and attentive that you think you’ve hit the love jackpot and won so big that you’ll live happily ever after. He woos you with ideas of a future together, taking you to different places and being that great listener who wants to share your problems, hopes and dreams. He loves the thrill of the chase, and is enamored with the novelty of you. Once his passionate ego has worn off and has gotten what he wants, he’ll get lazy and start challenging himself on the next target. How to protect yourself from this guy? Don’t fall for the lines and behavior right away. Control yourself, take your time before investing your heart and proceed slowly. Make sure that he means what he says, and do not give up your personal values and beliefs just for a hope to keep the relationship. And the best way to do that is to let time be your guide. Usually these guys don’t want to put in the work to develop anything long term so you’ll know in a short period of time if his words mean anything. Mr. Flake This one is characterized by constantly flaking out on you at the last minute. If a guy stands you up, blows you off, or shows up late, he does not have respect for your time and plans. Bottom line, he does not respect you and does not care whether or not you are in his life. Time is precious and when he’s not in sight when the arranged time strikes? Move along.... Mr. Afraid of commitment You go on a great couple of dates, things are going well, you feel the vibe, you click on so many different levels and then you never hear from him again. He’s never able to discuss his feelings or freaks out and distances himself when you express how you feel about him. He’s truly afraid of intimacy and what follows with it. You try not to pressure him and accept the flow of things because you think maybe if you give him time he’ll come around and choose you. Ladies, it either moves forward or it does not. He has the right to stay on a limbo but it’s also your right not to stick around for him to commit. When a guy is head over heels for a woman and loves her fully, he will step up and commit rather than watching her walking out of his life. If he’s willing to watch you walk away, you know it’s time to kick him to the curb and keep on stepping! He only comes to see you late at night If he only calls you out at night, be forewarned that you’ve got a booty call pattern. It’s a way for him to get his sexual needs met and not commit to a real boyfriend/girlfriend relationship. You deserve to be taken out properly to restaurants, movies, and shows. You didn’t sign up to be kept in the closet for a temporary love spree. Make sure you stand up for yourself and let him know. He does not call you back the same Day or answer his phone when you call When a guy is really into you, he does not screen his calls. He’ll pick up on the first ring or

C r a ig C a r dif f in in t e rv ie w Tina Ironstone arts editor

courtesy Craig cardiff

TINA: How do you feel being a part of the “be orange day” and Engineers without Borders fundraiser? I noticed that proceeds will be benefiting Engineers without Borders (EWB) and the Mennonite Central Committee (MCC), sounds like you are a bit of a philanthropist. CRAIG: I think it’s important to mesh musical events with groups like EWB + MCC, and to make the connection that people can buy an entertainment experience and have it connected with something beyond that night. Also, the campus is such

a small bubble and I think EWB is one of the organizations that has strong roots, bridging the campus, community, international divide. And who am I kidding - I grew up in Waterloo, and all of my favourite people are Mennonites. They know how to party. Props to the Mennos. TINA: Why should people come to the show? CRAIG: Where to start... first of all, its the perfect first date. You’ll both be nervous, there’ll be love songs, the poignant moment where your hands touch on the too close together handrails. A few peach schnapps later, a fumbling night, an undergrad degree later, and moderately satisfying job, you’ll be recounting to children about

call you back within hours. When you see a pattern of days going by without a return phone call, you are not high on his priority list. Realistically, you are being avoided. Also, a guy who is not invested in your relationship is one who never answers the phone in your presence. If you see his phone constantly on vibrate or you visit his place and his answering machine is set to low volume or mute, he’s definitely still playing the field and chatting up new women. He never discusses your future or makes vacation plans Every guy has a life before meeting you. They schedule trips with their buddies, have guys’ nights out and are living the bachelor life. When a relationship is getting serious and has a future, he’ll start talking about the things he wants to do with you, places to go together and makes plans to manifest those dreams. His buddies take up less of his time and he’ll put you on center stage. If he does not bring up future plans or where he sees your relationship headed, realize that this may just be a seasonal romance. He does not remember or celebrate the events or dates that matter to you Some guys really do have a bad memory but if it’s important to you, he will make a real effort to remember the big moments. They’ll do whatever it takes: mark the calendar, note to self, to make sure not to forget. When he does not take the time to acknowledge and celebrate your birthday, anniversary or a major event in your relationship with a gift, a call, flowers, a card or even candy, it shows that he is just not into you. No one says he has to spend big bucks to make the day special, but the planning and effort is what counts. It’s all about creativity! When a guy is just not interested in a future, he stops calling (if he ever called at all), the visits become less and less frequent. Emotionally, he has already packed his bags and booked the flight to Singlesville .When a guy politely tells you that he can’t or he’s not in the right state of mind to make you happy, don’t ignore the message. Hold your head up high and keep moving forward with your life, without him. Time is precious and time waits for no one. Once it’s lost, we cannot get it back. So make sure you are giving your time to men who are worth the investment. At the end of the day, it’s about finding a love match that treats you right and wants to spend quality time with you. When you settle for less and waste your time on Mr. Wrong, you are selling yourself short on what you deserve. Trust your intuition (it’s there for a reason) You know how sometimes you just know? You can’t necessarily say why, but you know deep down. Trust your sixth sense, your intuition along with some of the test above. Also try asking your friends for their opinions, away from the fire so to speak. Another view can be so helpful, as long as it is constructive. Remember to avoid negative people but sometimes others can see what you cannot.

how you first met. The show will be perfect and memorable — we’ll forget ourselves in the songs. Like a big warm hug from the blacksheep aunt who bought you beer in high school. Like Kim Mitchell’s classical Canadianna contribution ‘Patio Lanterns,’ but without the 80’s anchoring it to one space or time. TINA: Any songs in particular you look forward to performing? CRAIG: “Soda” is a song I wrote for my mum, talking about her journey with cancer, and how she led our family through it, and the sing along part is perfect for big crowds. We’ll shout the roof off the place. I’ve also been practicing some more obscure cover stuff — bringing

back the classics by folkifying the Smiths and Cure. Not going to lie to you — I think Robert Smith misplaced his energies. Born at the wrong time. Lyrically, he was closer to Dylan or Joni than any of his contemporaries. TINA: Anything else you want people to know ? CRAIG: $6 for student tickets in advance, $10 for community, $15 at the door. The performance is being video taped by UW Alumni documentary filmmaker J Brett Green who is coming on the road and capturing four evenings, so look extra special for the show. cironstone@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

Arts & Entertainment

Imprint, Friday, February 27, 2009

l o s t a r t

n spring of 2008, George Lucas and Steven Spielberg did the unconventional by releasing a fourth addition to the Indiana Jones franchise entitled Kingdom of the Chrystal Skull. It met with mixed reviews, the usual crowd conflict of ‘‘don’t mess with classics’’ and ‘‘I have been awaiting this day for 19 years’’ people. But when I saw it, my reaction wasn’t exactly centered around the fact that Jones was actually back; instead, it felt refreshing to see a movie made the ‘old’ way again. Ironically, Indiana Jones began as a revival of old-style movie-making, attempting to capture the formulaic entertainment of adventure serials from the ’30s. But is Crystal Skull really a diamond in the ruff ? Are modern adventure films losing touch with your sense of adventure? In the 1930s, the film industry was spreading its wings, colouring cartoons and introducing sound to the screen. Adventure was popular in the literary world, and on the radio. With no TV, you had to picture the scale of everything you heard. Serials were episodic films (So n’ So vs. the X of Y) popular in this time and George Lucas’ act of modernizing them in the early ’80’s with Indiana Jones would have a lasting impact. Just as Star Wars had achieved in science fiction, Indiana Jones highlighted people’s enjoyment of old thrills brought to screen. Adventure films usually do three things at once: they entertain you with action packed sequences, astonish you with exotic ideas in the setting, and tie you to the characters because you enjoy what they’re going through even if they don’t. Lucas and Spielberg, who collaborated on the Indiana Jones franchise together, compared it early as a James Bond film “without the hardware” said Spielberg. That’s a fair assertion, given that Bond rarely fails to expand our minds in respect to how excitingly crazy the world can be. Even though they were renowned for their special effects, there was something more intimate between the audience and the plot. It was as if something clichéd, like a serial story, could be appreciated for what it is: fun. The visuals are not supposed to steal the show, and the huge budgets afforded to the genre of adventure sometimes forget that cinematography is more about keeping you focused on the story. Even so, Chrystal Skull does have a three-film legacy behind it for getting through to you. Modern adventure movies tend to lean more towards what can be described as ‘believability’ when they’re not competitions between computer graphic artists. The supernatural element has been more toned down these days, with films like National Treasure (2004) and Sahara (2005) maintaining the exotic wide-scale plots of adventure serials like Indiana Jones, but also imbuing them with mortal realism. The notable exceptions to this aside from Chrystal Skull are The Mummy franchise and Peter Jackson’s King Kong (2005). But they are little more than CGI-oriented revivals of the old-style adventure films, being remakes and all. I say that like it’s a crime, which it’s not, but I’m sure people are getting tired of this whole trend, most of us have HDTV now, anyway. Is Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Chrystal Skull truly unique these days or just an effective piece of nostalgia? Harrison Ford doesn’t look like he has another sequel in mind but Spielberg has expressed interest in letting Shia LaBeouf wear the hat from now on. Maybe it’ll inspire a new generation of similar adventure films, ones that don’t rely solely on CGI to be fantastic, but also on imagination. We’ve seen that film-makers know how to craft exciting plots from adventure novels and movies but we haven’t had the bare-bones appeal of a franchise like Indiana Jones where graphics and realism are just conveniences.

great

egassner@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

ometimes it seems like lyrics aren’t really a big deal for bands these days. As long as the beat is catchy it can become the next big single and everyone will be wondering whether we’re human or dancer. Well, this week’s band won’t be asking nail-biting questions like that, but they do know how to write. Of course, in the end lyrics — like anything to do with music — tend to be subjective and some people prefer songs where the meaning itself is more subjective or cryptic. If you want cryptic, I suggest you check out The Mars Volta, but I prefer to actually have an idea of what a singer is singing about. That’s why this week’s band is Hurt (or sometimes written HURT). When I first heard of Hurt, I didn’t have high expectations from a band whose name probably took all of two seconds to come up with. However, when I actually listened to them I was disappointed that no one had ever introduced me to this band. A note that should be promptly expressed is that this article refers to the American band from Virginia — opposed to a different Hurt which is a Polish punk band. Hurt was formed in 2000 and have since released four albums, but their later albums Vol. 1 and Vol. 2 mostly have songs from their earlier ones in higher quality, so Vol. 1 is their real starting point. Now again you might be wondering about a band’s writing ability when they label their albums Vol. 1 and Vol. 2, which is almost as lazy as Billy Talent and Billy Talent II. However, it actually makes sense in Hurt’s case. For one, because, as previously mentioned, the albums are mostly compiled of earlier songs that were redone. But secondly, because the band actually wanted to originally release Vol. 1 and Vol. 2 as a double-CD release but their label didn’t want to put that much of an investment into a new band. Instead Vol. 1 came out in 2006 and Vol. 2 got a bit more time for them to perfect it, and it was released in 2007. While Vol. 1 is a great album, Vol. 2 managed to top it and therefore that’s the album I’m suggesting this week. The albums are clearly connected and little touches like the sound of rain at the end of Vol. 1, which is then repeated near the beginning of Vol. 2 help to solidify this. Additionally, while both albums have their quieter songs, they both also have their louder songs — but Vol. 2 is a little bit more sporadic. Hurt tends to have an overall sound that could be considered “metal” but other times that really doesn’t feel like the case. Things like the use of violin, piano, a banjo and a dobro help to further vary their already frantic sound. Vol. 2 begins with the track “Summer’s Lost,” a song which picks up speed and gets angrier as it goes along. Their first single from the album, “Ten Ton Brick,” follows and increases the energy yet again before letting up and leading to the quieter “Aftermath.” While I can highly recommend every song on this album, the album peaks at the middle with the tracks “Talking to God,” “Loded,” and “Better,” all great examples of Hurt’s lyrical ability. Another thing that really helps Hurt’s lyrics stand out is the fact that they don’t hide them. Vocalist J. Loren Wince is always easy to understand — whether he’s yelling or softly singing. All of the songs on Vol. 2 have a story to tell and lyrics that actually make you more interested in the songs themselves — not just vocals thrown onto a catchy beat. However, I don’t want to downplay their instrumentation, which in unison with their vocals, really helps to make this a unique “metal” band. You can check out their heavier song “Ten Ton Brick” at www. myspace.com/hurt along with their new track “Wars,” for their upcoming album Goodbye to the Machine, which comes out on April 7.

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Arts & Entertainment

Imprint, Friday, February 27, 2009

The ’80s: Love and Heart

Come write for imprint!

Be artistic! Express your creativity! write about music, movies, literature, webcomics, and much much more! arts@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

amackenzie@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

ometimes it’s hard to tell why the 80s are such a big deal these days. Are we looking back at the 80s with condescension and detachment? Or is our fascination with all things 80s a more sincere expression of genuine nostalgia? It’s hard to tell, and that’s probably because the answer falls somewhere in between. A lot of folks might Heart The 80s ironically. But a lot of folks sincerely love the 80s. And some folks in ironic “I Heart The 80s” T-shirts might even have some love hidden away in those cold two-dimensional hearts. Some people don’t think there’s any disdain for the excesses of the 80s at all. Oh, it’s goofy and silly and dorky, they might say, but that’s what makes it so awesome! Those people need to watch Rick Astley’s infamous “Never Gonna Give You Up” video again, where you can smell the condescension from over the Internet. Has anyone ever said “that song is so 80s” in a positive way? When one of the most recognizable cultural touchstones of the decade is a goofy white dude bellowing out a generic, cheesy love ballad, there’s got to be at least some degree of irony in our appreciation of the decade. It’s as easy to argue that the 80s are taken seriously as not. On the one hand, we can look at Rick Astley’s rediscovered celebrity and smell the condescension from across the Internet - does anyone say “that song is so 80s” in a positive way? On the other hand, however, the 80s influences in one of today’s hype magnets: M83, are sincere and acknowledged. In a Pitchfork interview, M83’s Anthony Gonzalez states bluntly that “... the 80s are really treated as kitsch and as a cheesy decade, and people love that. But for my part I consider the 80s in a really serious way, and

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large problem that the comics and graphic novel industry in North America finds itself facing is a world of almost paperless, higher technology. This web-based world is currently a problem for many forms of print media such as magazines and newspapers, but print comic creators have to their fair share of suffering. While this issue has overcast itself over the industry every since its prime, this concern has come up again with greater force since the economic recession in late 2008. “Print’s dying, my friends. The Web is where it’s at,” said Scott Kurtz (www.pvponline.com) from the podcast Webcomics Weekly, “I used to be lax to say that, but it’s turning out that […] maybe print’s not dead but just maybe a little sick.” While Kurtz’ later part of his line may originally come off as sarcastic, it’s certainly one of the loudest sentiments right now. In fact, there’s been an odd disconnect between the worlds of webcomics and of print comics for the longest while, mostly on the topic of who has a more credible business model. Jeph Jacques (Questionable Content; www.questionablecontent. net) responded to a retracted entry by Neil Straab (Rehabilitating Mr. Wiggles; www.mrwiggleslovesyou.com), for which Straab later apologized to the webcomics community for.

“

ptrinh@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

Ironically enough, and as mentioned before, a good amount of print-comic promotion comes from personal blogs and small press websites, and many of my favourite print comic artists gained initial fame making online comics...

In particular, Jacques went on to mention that many people in the print field see webcomic artists as merchandising salespeople rather than people selling their actual work. “[T]he real problem is that many print cartoonists honestly think this way about webcomics,” wrote Jacques. “Not only does it reek of sour grapes, it is dismissive of a business model that arguably works better than any other yet found for comics on the internet.” Comic creator and associate editor of Nickelodeon Magazine, Dave Roman, shared his own opinions on the world of digital vs. print comics on his blog (http://yaytime.livejournal.com), which is probably the fairest response I’ve heard from comic creators. “I don’t think the next generation of kids will have a problem with reading things digitally,” said Roman, “and won’t miss the experience of print that so many of us romanticize.”

“

TOUCH ENTERTAINMENT PRESENTS...

there is no irony at all in my musical relation to the 80s.” There’s a idea floating around that says we get nostalgic for a period of time that’s 20 years past. In the 90s, the 70s were big; think of That 70s Show, A Night at the Roxbury, and Dazed and Confused. In the 70s, the 50s were big, with Grease and Happy Days being some of the decade’s biggest screen hits. The 50s even pined for the 30s - Singin’ in the Rain, widely viewed as the best musical ever made, was a love letter to 1930s Hollywood. There aren’t a lot of explanations for this phenomenon. Perhaps the most common is the idea that young movers and shakers from 25-45 feel nostalgic about their formative years. 25-45 comprises a pretty huge chunk of musicians and a lot of directors. But that doesn’t explain rappers like the Cool Kids, who rap about “bringin’ [19]88 back.” Mikey Rocks, one of the two Cool Kids, was born in 1988. If that theory is true, he’s taking the idea of ‘formative years’ pretty literally. The Cool Kids are encouraging for those scared that the 80s aren’t getting taken seriously. They’re two kids, aged 20 and 24, whose entire schtick is a wide-eyed homage to rap’s golden age. When they blew up off the strength of singles “Black Mags” and “88”, skeptics abounded, thinking they were simply exploiting our 80s fascination. But the critical tide has since turned; now, they’re generally regarded as scholars who genuinely love 808 claps - all without a whiff of nostalgia. Sure, we dress up silly for cheesy 80s nights and go crazy for its wacky excesses. But if youngsters with no emotional connection to the decade can appreciate it so sincerely, the rest of us might not be so jaded either.

I find this conflict heart-breaking mostly because I see a lot of comics in print in their prime right now. Ironically enough, and as mentioned before, a good amount of print-comic promotion comes from personal blogs and small press websites, and many of my favourite print comic artists gained initial fame making online comics — Kean Soo, Kazu Kibuishi, Hope Larson, and Raina Telgemeier to name a few. So the big question that comes from all this is: “Will webcomics be the wave of the future, overshadowing the world of print?” In this case, I don’t really think so, but people in the print comic industry are going to suffer a lot. It’s going to be a long ride, but I do hope that we do not lose too much of the comic world during this recession.

Science & Technology

Imprint, Friday, February 27, 2009 science@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

A friend in need The delights and agonies of society

Lana Sheridan staff reporter

o one likes to be excluded. Why does social isolation hurt so much? Why is envy so bitter, and why can the downfall of a rival feel so sweet? In a recent article in the journal Science, a group of researchers from the University College of London published the results of a pair of studies examining the mechanisms for envy and schadenfreude: the happy feeling resulting from seeing something bad happen to someone else. They discovered that emotional pain from social causes is more closely related to physical pain than scientists previously appreciated. In the first study participants were asked to imagine themselves as the main character in a story and rate their feelings of envy towards three other characters. Meanwhile, scans of their brains were taken to compare the levels of activity in various regions. Predictably, those involved reported feeling envy only when the other character possessed superior abilities or qualities to the protagonist, but the envy was intense solely when the character also bore similarity to the protagonist. In this case the scans showed activity in a region of the brain known as the dorsal Anterior Cingulate Cortex (dACC) and other parts activated by physical pain. In particular, a different part of the ACC was involved that is reserved only for personal discomfort, and not empathic responses to witnessing pain in others. In the second study the UCL researchers observed the same participants’ imagined feelings of pleasure on the part of the protagonist at misfortune to these characters. Both the perceived emotional response and the activation of reward centres in the brain, including the ventral striatum, occurred only when the character had been intensely envied. These same centres deal

Wael Elsweisi staff reporter

Alcohol and a million women

Although there are ample conflicting studies, there is a general consensus that alcohol consumption in women increases their risk of developing cancer. In fact, 13 per cent of cancers of the breast, liver, rectum, mouth, and throat are attributed to alcohol consumption. The latest of studies comes from a team of scientists at Cancer Research UK. The study followed 1.3 million women who drank low to moderate levels (three drinks or fewer) of alcohol over a 7-year period. Overall, it was found that consuming just one drink a day increased the risk of all types of cancer by 6 per cent in women up to the age of 75. Individually, however, one drink a day caused a 12 per cent rise in the risk of breast cancer, 10 per cent in rectal cancer, 22 per cent in esophageal cancer, 29 per cent in mouth cancer, and 44 per cent in throat cancer. Interestingly, the type of alcoholic beverage did not seem to make a difference — just the amount. “We know that too much alcohol increases the risk of a number of cancers. This latest study shows that even relatively low levels of drinking increase a woman’s risk. It is important that women are as well informed as possible so they can take responsible decisions over how much alcohol they drink,” said Sara Hiom of Cancer Research UK. The study is published in the Journal of the National Cancer Institute.

Mark Zammit reporter

with physical pleasures such as sex and eating when hungry. It seems that social needs and threats to the fulfilment of these needs are experienced as deeply as immediate physical requirements such as food and shelter. It points to an evolutionary past in which being ostracised from the group was akin to a death sentence. Lending further credence to this view, a study lead by John Cacioppo at the University of Chicago presented at the annual American Association for the Advancement of Science meeting, found that people who feel lonely show different neural responses than those who do not. When shown pictures of people involved in pleasant activities, lonely people showed less activity in the ventral striatum than people who did not feel lonely. These reward centres were more attentive to uplifting images that were not associated with people. In addition, depictions of people involved in conflict tended to activate different areas of the brain in lonely individuals. In both groups the images stimulated the dACC, but in lonely people the visual cortex was more strongly activated. Perhaps this occurs as a defensive reflex, in order to more carefully notice social cues and prevent further isolation. The more gregarious participants showed heightened activity in a region of the brain that is associated with understanding the feelings and taking the perspective of another person. It is unclear which is the cause and which the effect. Do lonely people adapt to their loneliness by developing alternate responses to social situations and increasing their enjoyment of non-social pleasures? Or, since loneliness has been shown to be partially heritable, are people lonely precisely because they derive less amusement from everyday social interaction? Now that it is becoming understood that evolution has hijacked the brain’s pain response circuitry to give a similar urgency to addressing social and emotional discomfort, and that isolation is associated with health problems, it is worth re-thinking assumptions that guide daily behaviour. Seen in this way, solitary confinement may be a form of torture, and giving one of your friends the cold shoulder could be just as damaging as punching him or her and getting it over with. lsheridan@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

armel chesnais

New and improved: hormone-free contraceptive pills

Compounds found effective against cerebral palsy

Among Canadian women, the second most common way of preventing unwanted pregnancies is through their use of birth control pills. The most common being the “combination pill,” which is a mixture of the two key hormones estrogen and progesterone. Despite the best of efforts, these pills continue to have undesirable side effects, ranging from nausea and minor bleeding to potentially cardiovascular problems and cancer. A recent multitude of studies at Karolinska Institute in Huddinge, Sweden, however, have brought us closer to manufacturing a hormonefree contraceptive pill. Mammalian eggs are coated with a glycoprotein layer called the zona pellucida. One of the main glycoproteins is ZP3, which must first bind to sperm before they can burrow their way through the egg on their way to fertilization. In the new set of studies, mice engineered to lack the ZP3 protein lost this coating, rendering them infertile. Interestingly, this is in agreement with previous studies on women that attributed their infertility to abnormal ZP3 function. Thus, the next generation of pills would aim to bind to ZP3, rendering women temporarily infertile, without further subjecting them to hormonal problems. This breakthrough is particularly significant for birth control pill users because this contraceptive has been available since the 1950s, and although the cocktail of estrogen and progestin have been varied, a hormone-free alternative would be breakthrough.

Cerebral palsy is a neurodegenerative disease that can severely impact body movement and muscle co-ordination. It is caused by severe trauma to the brain before, during, or shortly after birth, but is typically diagnosed after the age of one. Recent research by a team of scientists at Northwestern University has formulated two compounds that dramatically lower the incidence of cerebral palsy. In fact, 83 per cent of fetuses born to animals treated with one of the compounds showed no cerebral palsy characteristics, whereas 69 per cent of those treated with the other were born normal. Further, none of the treated fetuses died, whereas more than half of those not treated died. Nitric oxide, along with low oxygen levels, has long been implicated in cerebral palsy development. It is required for normal neuronal function, but at high levels it can severely damage brain tissue. The new chemicals act by inhibiting the nitric oxide-producing enzymes in brain cell, thereby keeping its levels in check. “The results were just stunning, absolutely amazing[...] There was a remarkable difference between animals treated with a small dose of one of our compounds and those that were not,” said study leader Richard Silverman of Northwestern University. The study is published in the journal Annals of Neurology. — With files from BBC News, NewScientist, and e! News welsweisi@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

Safari 4 Beta reminiscent of iTunes and everything else Apple

Apple has released the public beta of Safari 4, heralded as the fastest and most advanced web browser to date. It includes some classic Apple features, as well as performance and Windows-oriented tweaks. In the style of iTunes and the iPod, Safari 4 now includes Coverflow, a feature which allows the user to “flip” through thumbnails of bookmarked pages and browsing history. As well, Apple has included a Top Sites page, a customizable array of thumbnail-previews of your favourite and frequented sites. You might recognize this feature as an improvement on the Most Visited page featured in the Google Chrome browser. For those on the Windows side, Safari 4 Beta uses the current user-interface theme for a more seamless desktop integration. This has no effect on the browser’s performance, which is reported to outshine everything else on the market. Apple accomplished this with the addition of the Nitro engine, boosting rendering speed for both HTML and JavaScript. No date has been set for the final release, however the beta can be downloaded from http://www. apple.com/safari. Morgan Solar develops revolutionary solar concentrator

Morgan Solar, based out of Toronto has developed a new method for concentrating solar energy onto photovoltaic cells. Unlike existing technology, which focuses the light using complex lenses or mirror arrangements, Morgan Solar’s Light-guide Solar Optic (LSO) is an acrylic and glass lens that focuses light within its own structure, concentrating the energy over 1,000 times before applying it directly to a small solar cell embedded in the centre of the device. The key advantage of this system over others is its closed design; the light does not leave the device once entering, eliminating possible contamination or component misalignment. Since current photovoltaic technology is expensive and still inefficient, creating viable solar solutions is a difficult endeavour. The LSO from Morgan Solar can be mass-produced at a relatively low cost, providing monumental power gains over ordinary solar arrays. With testing underway, Morgan Solar expects to have the LSO on the market by the end of 2009. NASA’s Orbiting Carbon Observatory fails to enter orbit

The Earth System Science Pathfinder Program was developed by NASA designed to use an orbiting satellite, the Orbiting Carbon Observatory, to measure atmospheric CO2 levels and provide scientists with detailed information on global carbon distribution. This data would allow for a better understanding of Earth’s atmospheric carbon regulation system and a deeper insight into global warming. The satellite was set for launch Tuesday, February 24, and would circle the earth every 16 days in a polar orbit. According to the mission page at NASA. gov, the Orbiting Carbon Observatory lifted off from Vandenberg Air Force Base in California, atop a Taurus XL launch vehicle at 4:55 am on February 24. However, a problem with the doors of the payload bay prevented them from opening, and the unit crash landed in the ocean somewhere near Antarctica. With nearly a billion dollars from the U.S. Economic stimulus bill aimed at NASA and the National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration, we can expect that this will not be the only attempt at launching a satellite of this nature. — With files from MorganSolar.com, TechnologyReview, and NASA

Science & Technology

Imprint, Friday, February 27, 2009

Mimicking nature

f you compressed the Earth’s life- we continue to fiddle with technology tion into our own designs for more time into one hour, humans have when nature has already created ways sustainable solutions. By studying only existed for a few seconds. In of solving our problems? This is what the methods of organisms around that time, we’ve strived to create tech- the emerging field of biomimicry hopes the world — how they collect food nology that allows us to survive, adapt, to remedy. and water, produce and store energy, and live comfortably. However, we have Biomimicry is the study of and even create colours and pigments had a short period of innovation, and nature’s design and its implementa- — scientists attempt to create new we’re not doing very well. technologies that are more Natural evolution has been sustainable, non-toxic, abandoned for a more techand have little impact on nical, fast-paced solution. the environment. The While our solutions have Biomimicry Institute’s their advantages, how long website, AskNature.org, can they be sustained? Are describes biomimicry as they really strong enough viewing nature in three disto replace the work of miltinct categories: a model, lions of years of testing and a measure, and a mentor. evolution? As we fiddled We seem to forget that we with machines, nature ran are a part of nature too, its course, and patiently not separate from it. It created its own methods of makes sense to be viewing chemistry, transportation, nature as a guide to how and energy production. we should act and develop, These have withstood because ultimately, it is courtesy asknature.org the test of time and are nature that will determine intrinsically suited to the The Eastgate Centre mimics the tunnels and open- whether we survive or perenvironment. So why do ings found in termite mounds to save on energy. ish as a species.

theferty@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

Biomimicry covers everything from maintaining temperatures in homes to creating colours without toxic chemicals. One example is the macrotermitine termite in Africa. Their mounds, or homes, have mastered temperature regulation through carefully placed tunnels and openings. While the environment outside can reach temperatures ranging from about 2 to 40 degrees Celsius, the mounds maintain a temperature of around 30 degrees Celsius. This may be too warm for us, but it is perfect for them. They do this simply by narrowing shafts going up through the mound to channel and accelerate the removal of warm air. Cold air comes in through holes in the bottom of the nest, replacing the warm air. In Zimbabwe, the Eastgate Centre building copied this technique and managed to only use 35 per cent of the energy conventional buildings require, and saved them approximately $3.5 million USD in initial costs by avoiding air conditioning. Another strategy that is being implemented into many forms of technology is the mimicry of how butterflies create colour on their wings. The cuticle on their wings is composed of nano-sized layered structures that selectively cancel out some colours while reflecting others, depending on the structure and interspatial differences between these layers. While conventional dyes simply absorb and reflect wavelengths, butterflies use varying structures between layers to reflect certain wavelengths. Humans are now mimicking this strategy to create colour without the use of toxics and the manufacturing methods associated with them. This method creates vibrant, high-performance low-energy displays for electronics (such as cell phones).

One issue that might come up in biomimicry is working on the large scale that humans need; namely in energy and food production. Most of these natural processes are specific to a single animal or species that doesn’t require a lot of energy like our population does. However, with technology, we should be able to amplify these processes to generate more of what we need. As well, there are still entire ecosystems to be explored. Another issue is that many of these strategies are specific to a certain ecosystem, such as the termite mounds. They wouldn’t be very handy during a Canadian winter. However, there are plethoras of species that can survive in those conditions, and who is to say that strategies from Africa can’t be even partially integrated into Canadian designs? With our expanding technological knowledge and handiness, it shouldn’t be hard to emulate the simple strategies of a butterfly, termite, or any other species. Instead of continuing to control nature and change it to fit our unsustainable needs, perhaps it is time we let nature change us to fit its needs. After all, if there’s one thing we should never forget, it is that we are also a part of nature, and no matter how large our cities get, nature can wipe them out in an instant. We are still new to this planet, so let’s learn how to survive from the experts: the organisms that have had the past few billion years of trial and error to perfect themselves. If you are interested in seeing what you can do, just look around. You can also visit asknature. org to join discussions and learn more about the emerging solution that is biomimicry.

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Science & Technology

Imprint, Friday, February 27, 2009

Sex offenders migrate from MySpace to Facebook

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The

he internet has revolutionized the face of global interaction, improved public access to information, and, quite obviously, has simplified public access to pornography. Recently, internet social networking sites like Facebook and MySpace have also served the means of public dating websites like eHarmony for high school and university students. Ironically, the more people utilize the social freedom of the internet, the harder it becomes to monitor public safety within the realms of internet communication organizations. Take MySpace, for instance. In early February 2009, Telegraph reported that MySpace has “identified and removed,” 90,000 sex offenders from the social networking website over the past two years. Last year, the website claimed to have 50,000 sex offenders as users. Surprisingly, Telegraph also claims, “none of the registered sex offenders found on MySpace have been convicted for actions on the site.” MySpace uses the software Sentinel SAFE to identify sex offenders, which is a broad database of over 700,000 sex offenders located in the US. John Cardillo, former New York City police officer and CEO of Sentinel, said he found over 8,000 sex offenders on Facebook “without much effort,” using Sentinel. Unfortunately, the removal of 90,000 sex offenders from MySpace has not been a clear-cut success, particularly because, earlier this February, multiple websites reported thousands of MySpace sex offenders taking refuge on Facebook. According to TechCrunch, an unidentified Facebook spokesman said, “we are glad to be able to report that we have not yet had to handle a case of a registered sex offender meeting a minor through Facebook.” Although both websites boast immunity against sex offender/ user convergence to date, with such massive amounts of sex offenders using Facebook and MySpace, I find it hard to believe each of the 90,000 sex offenders removed from MySpace used it to stay connected with “Aunt Janet in Florida.” However, the spread of internet use in U.S. and Canada has contributed to public safety: sex-offenderwatch websites have gained massive public support, powered by social icons like Oprah and parents north and south of the border. Without websites like the National Sex Offender Registry (www.familywatchdog.us), the 90,000 sex offenders could not have been tracked on MySpace to begin with. But what of Canada? On January 14, 2008, Maclean’s Magazine published an article discussing the shortcomings of Canada’s Sex Offender Registry. Canada’s National Sex Offender Registry (NSOR) was the pet project of the Liberals in 2004, and was meant to serve as an investigative policing tool to monitor and locate rapists and pedophiles on a neighbourhood basis. Five years later, registration is still not mandatory, and “barely half of all convicted sex offenders have been ordered to sign up.” The article stated the count on NSOR was 16,295 individuals at the time the article was written. Although

Re a d e r

alomako@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

the issue of under-registration can be solved with a mandatory sign-up, the biggest loophole remains that the database facilitates investigation, but not prevention. For instance, if a young boy at Lincoln Heights Public School in Waterloo observes a suspicious man loitering on school property, and if the boy reports it to his school, even then authorities are not permitted to search the NSOR registry for a matching description of the individual. To say this limitation inhibits child protection would be an understatement. I am convinced that clichés that refuse to retire from language do so because they hold a degree of truth.

In this case, the cliché “with great power comes great responsibility” is relevant to what social networking sites should be pursuing — public safety before revenue expansion. From an economic perspective, this inquest is cringe-worthy. As a babysitter and someone who was a MySpace user at 13, I am using this week’s column as a call for proactive user protection methods to be treated as a social responsibility by online networking websites, utilizing and adapting the public safety aspect of the new genre of communication they are nurturing. I would also like to make it known to the Canadian public that they have

a tool on their hands for raising the standards of child protection. Family Watchdog and Cyber-safety.com are calling for signatures to petition the Canadian government to grant the public access to NSOR. If you wish to contribute, you can access the petition at http://www.familywatchdog. us/canada.asp. If you have any questions about the behaviour or location of your junk, please e-mail your questions to me at the address listed above or meet with me in the Imprint office Mondays, 11:00a.m. to 12:00p. m. and loiter with me.

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Sports & Living

Imprint, Friday, February 27, 2009 sports@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

The start of a new movement

Feds president pushed for an early athletics review, and now the lack of money is on the radar. sports editor

hen the majority of University of Waterloo students think about their school, sports isn’t the first thing that generally comes to mind. Over the years UW’s athletics system has received very little of its deserved recognition from the students, the community, and the school itself. Despite popular misconceptions about the nature of our athletics program, UW does support an incredible variety of sports and programs. Sports is not the most important drawing factor to UW; its high standing in the world of secondary education resides primarily in its academics. What UW athletics does do, however, is support 31 individual varsity teams, a great deal more than other schools such as the neighbouring Wilfrid Laurier, which only funds 21. The sheer amount of athletic diversity at UW allows a far greater medium for students to exhibit their many talents, though there’s a catch. The greater number of individual varsity bodies that require funding from the school has caused the university to stretch their athletic funds extremely thin. According to the 2009 Athletics Review conducted by the joint efforts of Feds, UW Athletics director, Bob Copeland and a council of his senior staff, UW spent approximately $3.6 million on its athletic program to support their 31 teams

26,000 students. Although this amount may seem impressive, when compared to WLU who spends $3.4 million for their 21 teams and a population of only 12,000 students, it’s easy to see where the UW’s numbers are lacking. “We understand that fitness is a priority for our students, through varsity and Campus Rec,” said Copeland. “Unfortunately, we severely lack the funding for it.” The lack in funds can be felt by students from all across the athletics board from team support to insufficient weight room capacity.

“

buildings,” said Copeland. “There’s been a lot of concern over the past several months and years in terms of quality, something that we’re looking to improve.” The review covers a great deal of issues that students themselves have brought forward. Concerns about space, accessibility, and the maintenance of the available facilities. Though the initiative taken by athletics is great to get the ball rolling, this isn’t a task that Athletics can face alone, and that’s where the SSAC comes in.

We have the second lowest athletic student services fee in Ontario. — Bob Copeland

“We have the second lowest athletic student services fee in Ontario,” said Copeland. Faculty members are not the only ones who have become aware of the insignificant funding in athletics. Copeland and his council have been taking the concerns and feedback of the student’s themselves throughout the year in order to figure out exactly what it is that the program needs. “A lot of the focus on the recommendations we put forward to the student services advisory committee (SSAC) this year involves increasing the quality of fitness and weight facilities at both the CIF and PAC

“

Caitlin McIntyre

The SSAC is the committee within the school that deals with the distribution of UW’s student service fees. They distribute fees to individual units of the school, athletics included, and in return progress reports are filed by each recipient. Beyond the progress reports provided to them by the units of the school, the SSAC also does an annual review of one specific section of UW. This year’s review was initially intended to cover Career Services, but upon the request of current Feds President Justin Williams, an active member on the committee, the switch was made to athletics. “Athletics issues have been a constant at this school since before I even arrived here,” said Williams. “This is a really productive step forward for the department as a whole.” Williams’ term has shown him the various shortcomings of the athletic program here at UW; problems that have a great deal to do with the school’s small athletic budget. “From the beginning of my elected term I’ve received complaints on the declining hours in the CIF, the maintenance of the facilities and general need for new equipment,” said Williams. “The first time I visited the PAC this year, I found that

Photos by imprint photo team

some of the treadmills that were out were actually broken.” After Williams’ call for a 2009 athletics’ review was accepted by the Grad Student Association, Copeland then picked up the review with his team. “I really applaud Bob for his review. It was honest, thorough, and it showed us just how much athletics really needs.” The call for better funding of the athletics program at UW has been acknolwedged, and the SSAC is now taking into consideration the necessary improvements in the unit. “Most of the funding should be received right away,” said Williams. “What we need is to ensure that further improvements are made in the future to keep this idea moving.”

This initiative is not a one-shot deal and there is a good chance that not all of the issues surrounding UW athletics will be addressed in the first year of these implements. This review has been seen by the SSAC, solidifying the first giant step for the future of athletics students. “This is big, and although the funding hasn’t been approved yet, the review did an excellent job in showing the needs of UW students,” said Williams. “It’s a start that I’m extremely excited for.” The students have spoken, and their needs have been heard, and with any luck this review will be just the start of a movement towards a bigger, better UW athletics. sports@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

Jersey consumerism Matt Wong reporter

ith the NBA and NHL playoffs around the bend, it seems appropriate to divulge some consumer wisdom when it comes to purchasing a jersey from your favourite team. The cost of jerseys are expensive these days. In an economic environment like ours, purchasing a jersey seems more like a large investment than a random splurge. However, in a lot of ways purchasing a jersey is like an investment: an investment in your status of patriotism

and an investment in your level of coolness. To throw down $70 to $200 on a shirt is a bit absurd, but your passion is your passion, and no one can take that away.

the game, either at home or away. Bring the love and the hate. When you’re thinking of buying a jersey, follow these rules and you can’t go wrong.

Note:

Rule 1: Favouritism

This in no way is justification for wearing a jersey whenever you feel like it. I beg of you, please do not be that guy who wears that mustard-stained Ottawa Senators jersey all the time. Please people, show some fashion responsibility. Wear jerseys on game days, during the playoffs, and when attending

If you love Steve Nash for his Canadian-ness or Steve Avery for his stick waving interference, or even Kobe Bryant for his inability to pass and his ability to be accused of sexual assualt, nothing will take that love away. I cannot sway you into purchasing any other jersey. This article, may not be for you. This

article is an aid for those who cannot pick a particular player to idolize.

Rule 2: Cost Cost, these days, is a huge factor to consider in any purchase. Different levels of jerseys have different prices. You may opt for the cotton T-shirt with just the number, or you may opt for the player replica. Obviously the higher you go, the more patriotic you are. Whatever you do, do not buy the nameless jersey. It defeats the whole point of this article, and it’s tacky. Rule of Thumb: If you can fit into a kid size XL, purchase that

jersey. Just like girls buying kid size Uggs, apply the same logic. You end up saving $20 to $30.

Rule 3: Trade/Injury/ Last-ability Buying a Jermaine O’Neal jersey would have been a huge mistake, with all talks of trade with Miami. Even worse, Avery, a decent player, that was thrown from team to team to out of the league; the decision to purchase their jersey is a lost cause. See TEAM JERSEYS page 27

Sports

Imprint, Friday, February 27, 2009

Team jerseys

Favouritism

Cristiano Ronaldo 25 1

Cost

Trade

Injury

Last-ability

Versatility

digit will give you a better fabric-tocost ratio. If you want to take it to a further step consider the number of letters that went into the name on the back. A Kiprusoff has way more letters than an Iginla. However with that logic any European last name would beat out any Canadian last name. In order to quantify your decision, I broke the decision down into a simplified decision making matrix, (the only thing applicable that I learned from PDEng). If you’re in engineering you’ll understand it. Weightings are given to each criterion and these weightings must add up to 100 per cent. A rank is given to each choice for each criteria. The “1” is most favorable while the “3” is least. Multiply the percentage by the rank, and sum all these values. The choice with the lowest sum is the best preferred option.

Materials

Remember...

How should you choose which one to buy?

Continued from page 26

Always wait at least one season to see if a new player will mesh well with the team. The likelihood of injury falls under this category too. If a player is prone to injury, then he’ll be riding the bench for majority of the season, rendering your jersey unwearable. The likelihood of an injury is hard to determine, but then again look at Eric Lindros and his series of concussions. Ask yourself, will the player last? Last-ability is the amount of time the player has before retiring. You want maximum longterm benefit out of your jersey. Therefore, opting for a rookie is a strong choice.

Rule 4: Versatility If a player is amazing enough, they are capable of competing on multiple teams. For example, Christiane Ronaldo is capable of competing for Manchester United, for the Portuaguese Euro cup team and the Portuaguese World Cup Team. Likewise, hockey players are capable in competing in NHL, World Cup, and the

Weighting (%)

Total

100

175

Jason Blake

245

180

table courtesy matt wong graphics by adrienne raw

Olympics. This gives you multiple because you don’t want to be the guy chances to wear the jersey. walking around with a muscle tee on and his “guns” on display. Rule 5: Material Another aspect to consider is the number itself. A number that requires The actual material that went into two digits obviously costs more than the jersey is something to consider. one that only has one digit. That is Perhaps you may opt for a hockey why I opted for the Ray Allen (#20) jersey over a soccer jersey, because over the Kevin Garnet (#5) That extra there are sleeves, and they can keep you warm. Or you may opt for a soccer jersey over the basketball one

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If your team wins, make sure to pop your jersey at opposing fans like Kenyon Martin on the Denver Nuggets, better known as the T-shirt pop “you’ve officially been pimped” that Xzibit does at the end of every episode of Pimp My Ride. If your team wins, pop the team logo in the front. And if player you chose is the game MVP, pop the players name like Orville Redenbacher (as told by Lil’ Wayne.) Now you have the information you need in purchasing that sought after sport jersey.

Coming up in sports next week!

Stay tuned for a report on the swim team’s

CIS championship results!

Sports & Living

warrior

Imprint, Friday, February 27, 2009

Waterloo Warriors Last Week Men’s Basketball Saturday, February 21 Waterloo 72 - McMaster 66

Warriors Ski their way through the OUA Evan Bell reporter

Men’s Hockey

Women’s Hockey

Saturday, February 21 Lakehead 6 - Waterloo 2

Saturday, February 22 Waterloo 3 - York 2

Upcoming Games Track and Field Friday, February 27 at York, TBD

Saturday, February 28 at York, TBD

wrap-up

CAN’T FIND YOUR TEAM’S GAMES HERE? Send your results and listings to sports@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

Something missing from Imprint’s Sports section? Want to see more extensive game, event and team coverage?

Why not stop by the Imprint office and be the change you want to see....

Give sports writing a shot!

he Waterloo Warriors hosted this year’s Ontario University Athletics (OUA) Nordic Skiing Championships on the ski trails of Haliburton last weekend. The two days of races included freestyle individual and relay events on Saturday, followed by classic technique events on Sunday. The men’s races consisted of the 10 km freestyle and 15 km classic race as well as the 3 by 5 km relay. Women’s 5 km freestyle was followed by the 3 by 2.5 km relay and 10 km classic. Lakehead and Carleton universite brought home impressive results, each having multiple wins. The Lakehead Thunderwolves pushed to first and third place in both the men’s and women’s relays while Carleton placed second. Carleton showed well, winning the women’s 5 km and placing second in the men’s 10 km freestyle and women’s 10 km classic. UW Warriors had a reasonable weekend with solid finishes by a number of athletes. In the 10 km freestyle Cam Moore finished 13th

at 26:22 ahead of Andrew Jeffery, Kieran Jones, and Yudai Nakagawa (19th, 25th, 29th). Kieran Jones placed 11th with a time of 28:06 in the men’s 15 km classic followed by Cam Moore, Andrew Jeffery, and Yudai Nakagawa placing 22th, 23rd, and 27th respectively. Nellie Dow ended the Women’s 5 km in 12th off of her 8th finish in the OUA qualifier, leading the pack of Waterloo’s Women Kelly Skinner, Martha Sutton, and Jess Stevenson (23th, 28th, 32nd). Dow also took 4th in an impressive 10 km classic ahead of Skinner, Stevenson, and Sutton (23rd, 29th, 32nd), securing her all-star status for the year. In the men’s and women’s relays Waterloo achieved a respectable 6th place with times of 45:54 and 28:16 respectively. Comprising the men’s team, Cam Moore, Andrew Jeffery and Kieran Jones fell behind Laurentian by 1.5 seconds. Members of the women’s team include Kelly Skinner, Martha Sutton, and Nellie Dow. Despite times and places generally slower than the previous qualifier events, Waterloo’s coach and athletes were pleased and look forward to improvements for next year.

Men’s hockey season comes to a close Caitlin McIntyre sports editor

he Warriors pushed into the play off week at the OUA with an impressive 1-0 win against Windsor, setting up for a series of games against the Lakehead Thunderwolves, on Saturday, February 14 Their first play-off game was in Fort William Gardens, Thunder Bay, on Wednesday, February 18. The tense game found Lakehead and Waterloo battling for the lead resulting in what was a seemingly unbreakable

tie. Overtime flew by without a single point scored, though not from a lack of effort from but sides. The game finally came to a close during double overtime were Lakehead scored the winning goal, beating out the Warriors with a score of 5-4. The Warriors faced Lakehead once more in a Satirday night home game. The team fought for their position in the playoffs, but ended up losing the game 6-2, putting an end to their season. sports@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

Athletes of the Week

Saturday, April 4, 2009

St. George Banquet Hall 665 King Street North, Waterloo

Nellie Dow Nordic Skiing 4th year, Health Studies Smithers, BC

Tickets (available at the PAC Office) March 9-20: $35 March 23-26: $40 Includes transportation

Tickets are non-refundable. Watcard and proof of age required

Keith Beavers Swimming

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IMPRINT | FEBRUARY 27

Masters Work Physiology Waterloo, ON

Comics & Distractions

Imprint, Friday, February 27, 2009

Crossword 1

Paul Collier

21 24

22 25

52 56

53 58

2 4 8 7 6 9 3 5 1

27 32

61 67

5 1 9 2 8 3 6 4 7

7 6 3 4 1 5 2 8 9

6 3 2 1 5 7 8 9 4

9 7 5 3 4 8 1 2 6

1 8 4 9 2 6 5 7 3

2. Lose interest

sound

1. Stalk

3. Sharp side

35. Heaped

10. One and the other

5. Flexible container

47. Bounded regions 48. Allow 49. Permit

70. Remove layer 71. Public dance hall 72. Innovative thought

N S

4 1 9

2 6 7

18 21

39 42

T Y

41 44

64 67

Cryptogram

Ytramqz mo qfr oblu bp vmq - Vmuumxi Ofxjrodrxtr Feb 20 Cryptogram solution All truly great thoughts are conceived by walking — Friedrich Nietzsche

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73. Finishes 75. Withhold

55. Hold back temporarily

69. Word artisan

2 7 8 2

5 6 1 8 6 4 8 3 9 5

53. Bellow

66. Empty of fluid

9 1 5

4 5 7 6 3 2 9 1 8

52. Move

65. Higher than

51. Change colour

61. Young sheep

14. Conceal

46. Exhale heavily

37. One of _____ days

6. Mineral containing 39. Meshed cord metal 41. Distant 15. Dispute 7. Lengths of time 44. Bringing death 16. Uncommon 8. Oxidize 46. To a great extent 17. Need 9. Bambi 49. Crib 18. Campus gaggle 10. Copper and zinc 50. Negative 19. Height times width 11. Bladed sticks 52. Young women 20. Leaf notches 12. Woody plant 54. Speedy 22. Under strain 13. Tip of 55. Obama promise 24. Quantities of money 21. Causes pain to 56. Balanced 27. __ You Like It 23. Masticate then 57. Small hard fruit 28. Conjunction perform deglutition Junction additive 58. Sums 25. Windows version 31. Place of privacy 59. Hallucinatory 26. Breed experience 35. Stroke 28. Exam time 60. Relieve 38. V shape 29. Signal to _____ 62. Manner 40. Spoil ratio 41. Gilled vertebrates 30. Never carried out 63. Have embodied 64. Quell 42. Travels on 32. Ladder steps 67. Solid aqua 43. Colonized insect 33. One or the other 68. Lower and raise 44. Wrong 34. Preceeds vowel 45. Proper “ain’t”

36. Paper

5. Group of executives 4. Converges

3 2 1 8 9 4 7 6 5

Across

8 9 6 5 7 1 4 3 2

Feb20 Crossword solution

Sudoku

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Comics & Distractions

Imprint, Friday, February 27, 2009

Ask

Nadya Suleman, the Octo-mom, may soon be evicted from her house. What is your advice for her? By Ted Fleming and Matt Pankhurst “Buy a nice tent.” 3A Nick Menzies Software Engineering

“Start a family circus.” Niall Wingham 3A Computer Science “Don’t give birth to children if you can’t support them financially.” George Li 2A Mathematics

“Start a team for the soccer world cup.” Mohan Sivapatham 2B Mathematics “Find a sugar daddy.” Melissa Grmusa 2B Sociology

“Marry someone rich; that’s why I came to UW.” Sowmya Science

“Pay your mortgage… I hope you have a big car!” Mitch Avis 1B Women’s Studies & Matt Mitchell 1B AFM

Think you can stump shaniqua? Give it your best shot.

distractions@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

Shaniqua distractions@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

Please help me! Girls bewilder me! Every time I find a decent girl they turn out to be a psycho-feminist who is inconsiderate of my opinion. Furthermore my feelings and ideas are always disregarded. I’ve dated many girls and I feel like I will be alone forever. For example, I had a problem with one of my girlfriends recently. She had just bought me a new video game that she knew I was very excited about. She came over dressed it in a short skirt and tight blouse while I was playing it. I thought that things couldn’t get any better and then she started seducing me. She practically begged for sex. I told her that I just wanted to get to the next save and then I spread my legs and said, “I have no problem with multitasking.” I guess she did because she slapped me across the face, buttoned up her blouse and left the room. Now she won’t return my calls. What do I do? Dear Joystick, Bitch, that girl isn’t psycho feminist or inconsiderate, she is a woman with a head on her shoulders. The inconsiderate one is you for assuming that it’s okay to have some woman gratify you while you aren’t even looking at her, or paying attention to her. Do yourself a favour and keep the women and video games separate. Tell your girl that if she’ll take you back your attention will be entirely focused on her in any and all future intimate encounters, and that you are lucky to have a lady thoughtful enough to know you liked that game - but you know that she is more important than any game you could ever play. If that line, said with feeling, doesn’t get her to pick up her phone, then you’re right, she might be a jerk. But try it anyways, if she has half a heart she’ll take you back. Dear Shaniqua, I know this is a bit of a stupid question, but how often are couples supposed to have sex? My boyfriend and I have been dating for about a year and a half now, and currently we have sex once a week, usually less frequently. We went on vacation for reading week with another couple, and thanks to the thin walls, we could hear them having sex every night we were away! Does this mean my guy isn’t into me, or he has a low libido, or what? Should we be having sex more often? Infrequent Flyer

Dear Infrequent, You know, your boyfriend isn’t the only one who can initiate sex. If you are ready, willing and able, by all means, be the first one to get sexy. The frequency of your love making should not be based entirely around your man’s libido and sex drive, but yours too. If you feel like you want to have it more often, hop on him and see if he’s game chances are he will be. Although it’s not true for all men, most of the ones I’ve been with would like a taste more than once a week. Give this a try and see if it doesn’t add a few more good times into your week. Chances are, the reason you aren’t having sex more frequently is your man, doing all the start up work in the bedroom, thinks that because he’s always the one initiating that means you don’t want it as much. As for if you should be having sex more often, once a week is plenty, however, it is a rule in Shaniqua’s book that every healthy couple should be changing their bed sheets because of sexy messes about once a week (so make your once a week count, girl).

Missing the Missed Connections? So are we — send yours to distractions@ imprint.uwaterloo.ca. Don’t use real names or too many specifics: it’s just your loneliness we’re after!

fp_feb27:Layout 1

2/24/09

1:20 PM

Page 1

got March 27, 2009 7:00 PM, UW PAC Admission is free Performers can sign up for free in the PAC Athletics Office from Monday March 2 to Monday, March 16, 2009

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POSTSCRIPT

Imprint, Friday, February 27, 2009

GRAHAM MOOGK-SOULIS

IMPRESSION, BY JIM & LAN

RUNAWAY RINGTOSS

PETER N. TRINH

KURTIS ELTON

Loose Screws and In the Weeds shall return next week

Comics & Distractions

Never fear!