VEXMagazine CANADA’S FREE JOURNAL FOR MEN
SLASH ISSUE #34 PM 41481024
THE AXE MASTER WHO
SHIES AWAY FROM
GUITAR HERO
MIKE LABINJO
vexmagazine.com
FORMANS FASHION GROUP
SHOWS US THE LATEST IN
MEN’S WINTER
STYLES EXECUTIVE CHEF RYAN BOURQUIN COOKS UP SOME TASTY EATS FOR SUPER BOWL
PLUS
VIOLIN AND THE FIGHT
TALKS ABOUT PLAYING THE
SEEN ACROSS
CANADA
CAUTION:
EXACTLY HOW
PRETTY IS
TOO MAN PRETTY?
2010
WE REVISIT THE
CFL SEASON
AND WATCH 2 TEAMS
TAKE THE LONG
ROAD TO THE
98TH GREY CUP CHAMPIONSHIP
2011 GMC Acadia Denali
© GM Corp.
A Roman epic adventure, based on the classic novel of the same name, set in the dangerous world of second-century Britain. In 140 AD, 20 years after the unexplained disappearance of the entire Ninth Legion in the mountains of Scotland, young centurion Marcus Aquila (Channing Tatum) arrives from Rome to solve the mystery and restore the reputation of his father, the commander of the Ninth. Accompanied only by his British slave Esca (Jamie Bell) Marcus sets out across Hadrian’s Wall into the uncharted highlands of Caledonia – to confront its savage tribes, make peace with his father’s memory, and retrieve the lost legion’s golden emblem, the Eagle of the Ninth.
© 2010 Alliance Films Inc. All Rights Reserved.
VEXFEATURES 36 angeline
nahamko The sexy electrician from Ft. McMurray
32 Manscaping
Discovering the art behind knowing how much is too much when it comes to the way a man grooms himself.
44 Slash
One of the most recognizable names in rock ’n roll swings through to chat with us about his latest album.
52 A Road Revisited
We take a look back at the 98th Grey Cup Championship and the journey two teams made to get to the big dance.
58 Spotlight: Mike Labinjo
His season might have ended a little early, but the big man still has plenty to say.
64 Fright Night
Road warrior comic, Joe Vespaziani, recalls a nightmare come true one night while in Rapid City, SD.
68 Table Talkin’
Learn how to use the poker table as a key networking venue. Valerie Ross shows you how.
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ISSUE#34
MOREVEXSTUFF
ISSUE#34
10 LETTERS
We changed our look and our layout in the last issue. Some of you liked it ... some, not so much.
80 parting
12 JOKES
Life’s too short to go without a good laugh. Flip to the funnies and steal a moment just for you!
shot
Gentlemen, we give you Sasha Staden, the hottest basketball player on the planet. You’re welcome!
20 FRESH FACES
Barbie Hollywood: She’s a blonde bombshell who makes her living from dancing in a traveling burlesque troop. God bless her!
22 VEXOLOGY
We’re on #3 of our 4-part series on whiskey. It’s Ireland’s turn to show us what they got.
24 FOOD
With the Super Bowl coming up in January, we thought it would be good to show some big eats for the game that didn’t involve cheese or corn chips.
26 GEARED UP
There’s a reason why they call this ride the Boss, baby!
28 MUSIC
All this new music and not one of them is a stupid Christmas album!
30 MOVIES
30 years of Mad Max and Snake Plissken. Bring on the apocalypse!
60 FOX HUNTING
Morning Dove Meetoos: This halfVietnamese/half-Aboriginal vixen is God’s finest Cree-Asian!
72 FASHION
Yes, you can still wear jeans, but are you wearing the right jeans?
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VEXMagazine PUBLISHER / EDITOR IN CHIEF
Mark G. Bilodeau Vice President
Jeremy Nielsen Assistant Editor
Christopher Bloomfield Artistic Director
David Aaronson Director of Design
Andrew DeVore Senior Designer
Damian Fehmel Executive Assistant Andrew “McLovin” Corry Production / Pre-Press Assistant
Bonny Leung
Chief Photographer
Trevor Howell | www.323PhotoGrafix.com Contributing Photographers
Mark G. Bilodeau, Mike Bradley, David Ford, Archie Kan, Jeremy Nielsen, Eric Sit, Colin Smith Contributing Writers
Scott Dumas, Seth Miller, Master Sarah Moanies, David Nuttall, Bill Robinson, Valerie Ross, Anna Santiago, Joe Vespaziani Graphic & Web Design
Mathieu Prouse PrePress
Russell Greenlay Advertising Inquiries:
Alberta Sales Office Box 28007 Cranston RPO Calgary, AB. T3M 1K4 (403) 520-0116 info@vexmagazine.com Distributed by
VEX Magazine.com Ltd. Canada Post VM is published six times per year by © 2008 VEX Magazine.com Ltd. All Rights Reserved. PM41481024 Return undeliverable items to: VEX Magazine.com Ltd. Box 28007 Cranston RPO Calgary, AB. T3M 1K4 info@vexmagazine.com www.vexmagazine.com GST# 86889 5715 RT0001 All Trademarks presented in this magazine are owned by the registered owner. All advertisements appearing in this magazine are the sole responsibility of the person, business or corporation advertising their product or service. For more information on VEX Magazine’s Privacy Policy and Intention of Use, please see our website at www.vexmagazine.com. All content, photographs and articles appearing in this magazine are represented by the contributor as original content and the contributor will hold VEX Magazine Ltd. harmless against any and all damages that may arise from their contribution. All public correspondence, which may include, but is not limited to letters, e-mail, images and contact information, received by VEX Magazine becomes the property of VEX Magazine.com Ltd. and is subject to publication. To have unsolicited manuscripts, photographs and other material returned, it must be accompanied by a self-addressed return envelope with postage pre-paid. VEX Magazine is not responsible for loss, damage, or any other injury to unsolicited manuscripts, photographs, artwork or material. Reproduction of this publication in whole or in part without written consent from the publisher is strictly prohibited.
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letters
SING OUR PRAISES OR GIVE US A BLINDING JUNK PUNCH. Drop us a line at info@vexmagazine.com and take your best shot!
THE MAIL LIBIDO SOMETIMES OUR READERS CAN SAY THE DARNDEST THINGS!
Making a Pit Stop
Unbelievable issue, guys! Maybe it’s just me, but I thought the girls you featured in this past issue were the hottest ever. Teagan, Samantha and Asha were all incredibly gorgeous, but the photo spread you did with Alyssa Andel was mind-blowing! It’s easy to see why you made her your main girl for the issue. I’m actually thinking of having her name tattooed on my armpit as a tribute to her! Hahaha ... no, just joking. Keep up the good work. Gary Pastrovich Airdrie, AB You see, Gary, for anyone who might not have seen Alyssa’s pictorial or read her interview in the last issue, offering to tattoo her name in your armpit might not actually come across as flattering. We’re just sayin’ ...
Rookie Who?
I have to admit, your new cover style really threw me off at first. Think about it ... some unknown cop on the cover? Who the hell watches Rookie Blue anyway? This one’s right up there with that accountant-looking whiskey distiller guy you had on the cover a couple of years ago. Hey, here’s an idea ... for your next cover, why don’t you feature the current reigning World Snooker Champion, or something like that? That’d be super cool! Scott Crane via e-mail You make a good point, Scott. How dare we feature an Albertaraised actor who’s currently star-
ring in one of the most successful Canadian television programs in history, when we could have been putting up a photo of some guy who’s so bitter about his own unrealized dreams that he finds it necessary to write in to the province’s coolest magazine and reveal his own mediocrity?!!
Feelin’ Punchy
You left out some key players in your list of hockey’s top tough guys of all-time. How can anyone forget about enforcers like Gino Odjick, Larry Playfair or Calgary’s own Willi Plett? Jason Kolsby via e-mail There are probably a lot of
names we left out, Jason. But they’re all old or dead now, so we’re not really worried about offending any of them.
Freddie Got Fingered
Damn! You guys got rid of the centerfold! Now I can’t pull it out and staple it to my wall at work
anymore. That sucks! Fred Dartnell Calgary, AB Gee, Fred ... it’s probably not a very good idea for you to be pulling it out while you’re at work anyway. And we can’t even begin to list everything that’s wrong with stapling it to your wall. Seriously, dude, get some help!
SHE MAY NOT LOOK LIKE A HILLBILLY, BUT SHE SURE CAN PLAY THE BINJO!
When we asked VEX sports writer, Anna Santiago, if she would be willing to risk her office thumb wrestling title against Stampeders defensive lineman, Mike Labinjo, she only had one thing to say: “Bring it on!” 10 vexmagazine.com
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The Champion
The Challenger
On Your Mark ...
Say Uncle!
Anna’s solid 5’-1”, 95lb frame gives her the confidence to take on all comers.
Mike (aka Night Train) seems a tad cocky for a guy whose arm was recently in a cast.
The two fierce competitors lock hands and square off for the ultimate battle.
With the upper hand clearly hers, Anna has Mike on the verge of tapping out.
jokes
[
[
THINK YOU’RE FUNNY? PROVE IT! SEND YOUR BEST RIB-TICKLERS TO JOKES @VEXMAGAZINE.COM
Bungeejumping is a lot like getting a blowjob from your buddy’s grandmother. Sure, it may feel great, but for God’s sake, whatever you do, keep your eyes closed until it’s over!
A Redneck’s Lament
Fido’s Fellatio
Drinking Stiff
Benny & the Jets
Johnny, George, and Larry were driving down a backcountry road in their pickup truck when they saw a sheep caught in the fence with its hind end up in the air. Johnny said, “I wish that was Sharon Stone.” George echoed, “I wish it was Demi Moore.” Larry sighed, “I just wish it was dark ...“
Two drunks had just gotten themselves thrown out of the bar and were walking down the street when they came across this dog, sitting on the curb, licking his balls. They stood there watching and after a while one of them said, “Man, I sure wish I could do that!” The other one looked at him and replied, “Well, I think you might want to pet him first.”
Two old drunks are in a bar. The first one says, “You know, when I was 30 and got a hard-on, I couldn’t bend it with either of my hands. By the time I was 40, I could bend it about 10 degrees, if I tried really hard. By the time I was 50, I could bend it about 20 degrees, no problem. I’m gonna be 60 next week, and now I can almost bend it in half with just one hand.” “What’s your point?” asked the second drunk. “Well,” says the first, “I’m just wondering how much stronger I’m gonna get!”
Benny was sitting in a bar one day, mouthing off that he knew everybody. His buddy bet him $10 that he wouldn’t know the next person to walk in the bar. Just then, somebody walked in and said “Hey Benny, what’s up?” The guy then bet him $100 that he wouldn’t know the first person they’d meet out in the street. They went outside and saw someone coming. The person said “Hey Benny, how’s it going?” Flustered, the guy bet him $500 that he didn’t know the Prime Minister. So they drove up to Parliament Hill and the security guard said, “Benny, you know you can’t just show up here like this. The PM’s busy right now.” Getting agitated, he then bet Benny $1000 that he didn’t know the Pope. So they flew to Rome and went to the Vatican. Benny said, ”Watch up there on that balcony and I’ll come out with the Pope.” Benny went up and came out on the balcony with the Pope. He looked down and saw his friend had passed out. He went back down to him and said “Are you really that surprised that I know the Pope?” “No,” his friend replied, “somebody walked behind me and said ‘who’s that guy up there with Benny?!’”
Off The Deep End
A guy in a blue Speedo walked up to a gorgeous woman sunbathing by the pool. “You know,” he said, “I think my swimsuit matches your eyes.” “Really?” she replied. “Are my eyes bulging too?”
OK, drop anchor ... NO, WAIT!
TITLE SHOT! CAN YOU DO BETTER? Think you can come up with a better caption for this picture? Send it to us at info@vexmagazine.com. If we publish your entry in the next issue of VEX, you’ll win this rockin’ 40th Anniversary Collectors’ Edition box-set of The Who: Live at Leads!
$
LAST ISSUE’S WINNER
“Fine, we know you can dunk. But your outside shot still sucks big time!” - Brett Dowler
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out&about Halloween Lingerie Show A gathering of friends and silk-clad hotties at Bookers BBQ Grill & Crab Shack in Calgary. Isn’t lace a wonderful thing? photos by Archie Kan / SLAK Media
out&about Hard Knocks #9 For a group of non-violent guys like us here at VEX (i.e. complete wimps), these live MMA events are the perfect way to live vicariously. photos by Archie Kan / SLAK Media
out&about It Was A Grand Opening Our congratulations go out to our good buddy Gerry Forbes and the great folks at Vintage Group on the launch of Stonehill Restaurant & Tavern, in Calgary’s NW. Guaranteed you’ll see our people hanging out there a lot! photos by Seth Miller
fresh faces
Barbie Hollywood HERE’S A CALGARY-BASED DANCER WHO’S TAKING BURLESQUE TO A WHOLE NEW LEVEL. What’s the name of the dance troop you’re with? We’re called The Canadian Covergirlz. We’re an Alberta-based bikini review that travels across Canada with costumes and choreographed routines. How did you get started in a gig like this? I’ve always had a passion for dancing and performing. As a child, I had taken classes in multiple types of dance ... from ballet to artistic gymnastics to ballroom dancing. After I turned 18 I started working as a Go-Go Dancer in night clubs and got addicted to the attention and adrenaline. Ever since then I could never get enough. What do you say to people who call this kind of thing exploitative or degrading to women? People think that it’s degrading to show your body in public, but in fact, I feel this job empowers women. We get to play the role of the untouchable fantasy that all men long for. This job also gives us financial independence and confidence, which is a very crucial thing for a woman. We’re all doing this as our chosen career. Each one of us has been to higher educational institutions and somewhere along the way we all just realized that we wanted a different type of lifestyle, where we could express our creative and artistic talents. What do you think about the AGLC cracking down on burlesque shows in Alberta? I think the main issue they have is the concern that performers might go topless or fully nude, while not having a valid exotic dancer’s license. What we do is strictly a bikini review. It’s no different than someone going to a beach where you can see girls in their bikinis.
PHOTOGRAPHY BY COLIN SMITH
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vexology
by DAVID NUTTAL
David N uttall is the presid Epicure ent of an Cal (www.e gary picure ancalg ary.co and m m) Enoteca anager of Li and Spe quor Store (www.e cialty Wines njoywin e.ca)
MayThe Road RiseTo MeetYou (... just hopefully not too quickly.)
CRACK THE SEAL ON ANY ONE OF THESE BOTTLES OF IRISH NECTAR AND YOU’LL BE SEEING LEPRECHAUNS IN NO TIME!
›
THE WONDERFUL WORLD OF WHISKEY
There is no doubt that Irish whiskey is one of the oldest distilled beverages in Europe. Depending on how history is reviewed, the venerable Saint Patrick, who led a group of monks to Ireland in 432 A.D., brought with them not only Christianity, but also the art of distillation. These early spirits were used for medicinal purposes and thus were called the Irish Gaelic word for water of life, uisce beatha, which became corrupted to the English word “whiskey”. When King Henry II of England invaded Ireland in 1170, the popular product returned with him. Documented production of Irish whiskey can be traced back to 1276 and the world’s first whiskey distillery license was granted in 1608. The expanding British Empire resulted in Irish whiskey being exported around the world, to the point where it outsold Scotch whisky in most markets because its lighter body proved more popular. Irish whiskey is made from malted and unmalted barley and other grains, and is usually distilled three
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times, while Scotch is distilled twice. The Irish also very rarely use peat in the malting process, resulting in a softer, more caramel taste with a smoother finish than the smoky, earthy taste distinctive to most Scotches. As its popularity grew through the 18th and 19th centuries, there came to be over 1,200 distilleries and 2,000 stills in Ireland, most of them unlicensed. Because of this, in 1823 the British Parliament raised taxes and legalized 160 of the distilleries. With the growth of immigration to the New World during this time, over 400 brands of Irish whiskey were being exported to the United States, and it became one of the world’s leading spirits. While Irish whiskey enjoyed this status for about a century, several events transpired over the next 100 years, which almost destroyed the Irish whiskey industry completely. First, the continuous still was developed in 1831 by an Irishman, Aeneas Coffey, but it was rejected by his own countrymen who wanted to keep the traditional pot stills they had always used. The Scots jumped at the more cost-effective “Coffey Still” to create cheaper “blended” whiskies in direct competition to the Irish.
(part 3 of a 4-part series) As cheaper Scotch created one obstacle, then came the series of events in the first half of the 20th century that provided many more. First was World War I, then the 1916 Irish War of Independence and the partition of Ireland in 1919, followed by the English trade embargo, which left the United States as just about the only outpost for Irish whiskey exports. Unfortunately, Prohibition began in 1920, and lasted into the Great Depression, which was soon followed by World War II. The culmination of these circumstances resulted in the decimation of almost all Irish distilleries to the point where there were only three left, with one more in Northern Ireland, by 1950. While Scotch thrived and sales grew after repeal, the lack of Irish whiskey stock caused a global shortage of the product. It took the amalgamation of the surviving distilleries and the construction of new, modern facilities in the 1960’s and 1970’s to get Irish whiskey back on solid ground. While it will probably never reach its previous level of popularity, its distinct character and continued growth in sales worldwide proves it is more than just a little cousin to Scotch. �
l w o B r e p u S food
d e i r F n r e h t u So
THE NFL’S BIGGEST BATTLE OF THE SEASON WILL BE HELD IN ARLINGTON THIS YEAR. AND A BIG TEXAS GAME CALLS FOR SOME BIG TEXAS EATS.
Chef
RYAN BOURQUIN
The Main Dish, Calgary, AB
“This is a great Super Bowl meal because it’s quick, cheap and easy to do. Not to mention how many changes you can do to make it your own signature dish. It’s also perfect for the big game because if your team is losing at the half, you can take out your frustrations by pounding the crap out of the inexpensive cut of beef, coat it, cook it and still be back in time to catch the halftime show nip-slip.”
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CHICKEN FRIED STEAK
This is a way to have a good hearty meal during the game and it’ll probably cost you less than that big plate of nachos and cheddar cheese you usually stick in the microwave. ingredients
1 lb Beef (round or rump works well) 3 eggs (whisked) ½ cup vegetable oil 4 button mushrooms (chopped) ¼ cup onion (chopped) ¼ cup white wine ½ cup heavy cream flour mixture (combine in a mixing bowl) 1 cup all-purpose flour 1 tbsp paprika 1 tbsp chili powder 1 tsp cayenne pepper 1 tsp salt & pepper breading mixture (combine in a mixing bowl) 1 cup bread crumbs 1 tbsp chopped parsley 1 tbsp chopped thyme 1. Pound out your steaks with a meat tenderizing mallet. Coat them in the flour mixture and let them sit for approximately 10 minutes. Coat them
in the flour mixture again and then dip them in the whisked egg wash. Drop them into the breading mixture and coat thoroughly. 2. Heat the oil in a pan to 325°F. 3. Once the oil has come to temperature, lay the steaks in, being sure to drop them away from you to avoid any nasty spattering of scalding oil. Fry them up for 1-2 minutes on each side. Remove from the pan and set them on a cooling rack. (This helps keep them crispy and prevents them from going soggy.) 4. In the same pan (with the residual oil) toss in the mushrooms and onions and sauté until the onions are nicely caramelized (that means browned). Sprinkle in a tablespoon of the flour mixture and mix well. Dump in the white wine to help deglaze the pan and whisk to make sure there are no lumps. Pour in the cream and allow to simmer until the sauce thickens to your desired consistency. Salt and pepper to taste. 5. Put the steaks on a plate and pour the sauce over top. Now go catch the second half and eat!
GEARED UP THE BOSS IS BACK!
»
MORE THAN 40 YEARS AFTER ITS FIRST GALLOP IN THE STREETS, DESIGNER LARRY SHINODA’S ULTIMATE PONY CAR MAKES A ROARING RETURN!
RADICAL RUBBER
Back in 1969, then president of the Ford Motor Company, Bunkie Knudsen, hired the man who played a major role in the production of the first Corvette Stingray, auto designer Larry Shinoda, in an attempt to help boost the overall appeal of Ford’s lineup to the public. Shinoda’s first and greatest contribution was the Boss 302 Mustang, so named as a tribute to the man who hired him. Today, his pet pony has been revived and given a monster performance facelift, while still holding true to Shinoda’s original vision. The 2012 Mustang Boss 302 Laguna Seca Edition has been touted by Ford as being “a race car with a license plate”. Sitting in the driver’s seat, however, one gets the sense of being at the wheel of a luxury vehicle, rather than a finely tuned track-turner. But the beauty of this magnificent machine goes much further than skin-deep. Just pop the hood on this titan of torque and there’s no doubt that this beast is ready to peel the paint off of almost any competitor that might meet up with it at a red light. Shinoda passed away in 1997 from heart failure while awaiting a kidney transplant, but the lads at Ford are keeping his memory very much alive. Long may his horse run!
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Feel the full enjoyment of hitting the corners with all that horsepower thanks to the traction provided by R-compound high-performance Pirelli P Zero tires.
SPEC SHEET:
Price: $56,000 CDN Engine: 5.0L 4V Ti-VCT V8 Torque: 380 lb-ft Horsepower: 440 hp 0-100km/h: 4.1 seconds Top Speed: 249 km/h
P
THREE’S A CROWD
Ford made this Mustang even leaner and meaner by ditching the back seat, making the overall package lighter and faster.
STIFF COMPETITION
In order to make the Laguna Seca even more race-ready, a unique manually adjustable suspension system lets the driver tweak things just so for superior handling.
music
FRESH FROM THE STUDIO
Music you should own.
Florence + The Machine Between Two Lungs This 2CD rerelease of Lungs features twelve extra tracks that can only be described as “terrifyingly brilliant.”
EVERY LITTLE THING HE DOES IS MAGIC ò
We all remember Eddie Murphy belting out Roxanne from his jail cell in 48 Hours. And who can forget JD, the mild-spoken yet genuinely intimidating bar owner in Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels? Not to mention, there isn’t a guy on the planet who doesn’t secretly wish for this music icon’s Tantric mattress manipulation
abilities. It seems that Gordon Matthew Sumner (a.k.a. Sting) has got a Midas touch when it comes to the projects he chooses to undertake. His latest endeavor, Sting: Live In Berlin, is no different. This CD/DVD combo captures his performance of some of his most classic songs, backed up by the Royal Philharmonic Orchestra.
Kanye West My Beautiful Dark Twisted Fantasy Riddled with his trademark narcissistic arrogance, you still can’t help but love his shit.
Weezer Death To False Metal A collection of tracks that for one reason or another has not made it onto previous albums. Thank God they did this time!
ON THIS DAY IN MUSIC HISTORY ...
JANUARY 11, 1999
ª
A Court of Claims judge finds Sean Combs (then “Puff Daddy”) and Dwight “Heavy D” Myers negligent in the death of nine people and the injury of dozens of others. Following a charity basketball game in 1991, held at the City College of New York gymnasium, Combs promoted a concert headlined by Heavy D. The event had been oversold to almost twice the gymnasium’s capacity, while
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thousands of non-ticket holders crowded outside. In order to keep them out, Combs’ people barricaded the gymnasium stairwell door. When the people outside began breaking several windows in an attempt to gain entry to the show, a stampede ensued by the jammed crowd inside, resulting in nine people being trampled to death along with several others being injured. The college was also held partially responsible.
Jack Mills Kansas City Shuffle
This homegrown hip-hop orator spits his latest, backed by an eclectic mix of old-school and modern beats. Find it on iTunes.
movies
REMEMBERING
MAX & SNAKE OH, HOW WE MISS THE DAYS OF KICKING ASS AND TAKING NAMES. Lately, with films like The Book of Eli and The Road, we’re being bombarded with messages of tolerance and love for your fellow man. Well, we preferred it when our post-apocalyptic heroes hated the world and anyone remaining in it. It’s been
MAX Mel Gibson well relatively unknown in North America in 1981, so the movie trailers didn’t even feature him. Instead they focused on the chase scenes and crashes.
The studio initially wanted Tommy Lee Jones for the role of Snake Plissken. They felt that Kurt Russell’s previous work in Disney films made him inappropriate.
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The only scene that was actually filmed in New York was the opening dolly scene that follows a character past the Statue of Liberty. The rest of the filming was done in East St. Louis, Illinois, and St. Louis, Missouri.
The actual car driven by Max in the film is a 1973 Ford Falcon XB GT Coupe. This car was exclusive to the Australian market and only 949 of them were ever built.
ISSUE #34
30 years since Snake Plissken and Max Rockatansky blew us away on the big screen. To celebrate this milestone, we’ve put together some trivial tid-bits about theses characters and their movies you might not have already known.
The dog in the film was frightened by the sound of the car engines revving. In one instance, the dog relieved itself in Max’s car. In order to help prevent future soakings, the crew fit the dog with specially designed earplugs. Snake’s eye patch was not part of the original script. Kurt Russell came up with the idea in order to make his character look more menacing.
SNAKE The infamous chandelier car, driven by Isaac Hayes’ character, was a 1977 Cadillac Fleetwood sedan.
The film’s desert location was chosen primarily for its arid climate, however, shortly after filming began, it rained for the first time in over four years, drenching the cast, crew and equipment. Production was shut down for over a week.
More than 80 vehicles were destroyed in the making of this movie.
During the fight scene in the boxing ring, actor Ox Baker struck Kurt Russell heavily several times. Russell finally had had enough and told Baker to take it easy. In order to get his point across, Russell gave Baker a shot to the groin. Baker calmed down after that.
sex
with MASTER SARAH MOANIES
MIRROR, MIRROR, ON THE WALL.. FINDING THE BALANCE BETWEEN BEING A WELL-GROOMED MAN AND BEING ... WELL, JUDE LAW. PHOTOS BY RICHARD NELSON
¬
I enjoy a man who takes pride in his appearance, a man who knows the rewards he will reap from personal grooming, proper attire and a sexy pair of sunglasses. The majority of these men would not be selfproclaimed Metrosexuals, quite the opposite actually. They would rather consider themselves a ‘Man’s man’, on average sporting a few days of scruff, ripped jeans and the ‘just don’t care’ attitude that accompanies a ruffled appearance. They’d call themselves alpha males and hard workers. They’d eat meat, drink beer, try to keep fit and would never use the adjective ‘androgynous’ to describe themselves or friends of theirs. However, when it comes time for a night out on the town, a freshly shaven face, clipped fingernails, the use of hair product and suiting up suddenly transforms the Man’s man into what some people may assume to be a Metrosexual. A Metrosexual male is loosely defined as a man that spends effort, time and money toward tendencies commonly associated with a stereotypical homosexual male, be it
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in the areas of fashion, lifestyle, fitness, luxuries and personal grooming. Too much care and attention to your appearance tells the fairer sex you’re pretty and you know it. Lack of care and consciousness in your appearance tells the fairer sex that if you are unable to take care of yourself, you will never manage to take care of her, let alone a potential family. It is amazing how quick women can, and will, make assumptions based on your appearance. This is not unlike how men make assumptions based on appearance. The assumptions women make based on what you say mind you, well, that’s a whole other article. Just remember it’s 80% of how you look, 10% of what you say and 10% of how you say it. A Man’s man would never spend more time than his girlfriend in the shops or in front of the mirror. He would be in and out of that shop or away from that mirror in five minutes or less. A Man’s man would not kiss his juiced biceps when pumping iron at a public gym. (I have witnessed this, it was sad really.) A Man’s man would not attempt to sneak some of his girlfriend’s concealer to cover a blemish on his face.
He’d be a man. It is a zit. He’d get over it. (I caught this particular man in the thieving act and proceeded to serenade him with Carly Simon’s ‘You’re so Vain‘ for months. We’re not together anymore.) If you are wearing more jewelry than me, your skin matches the colour of Malibu Barbie or your lips are glossier than mine, my thoughts would lead me to believe that there must be auditions at the nearby mall for Jersey Shore. So wherein lies the happy medium between “The Situation” chachi and a Cro-Magnon cave man? Let’s start with the bare necessities and go over the naked truths of personal grooming. Manscaping! If you are not familiar with the term, you should be. LESS hair shows MORE... down there! For these sensitive areas, don’t be shy, ask for help. Samantha from HBO’s Sex in the City has shown that shaving your partner is a shared, intimate act with beneficial results for both parties. If you don’t have that type of rapport with your partner or you are cruising for a potential partner, consult a professional – not THAT kind of professional, a professional aesthetician. There are countless spas that assist in
hair removal and manscaping of a more sensitive nature. Why not take advantage of the optical illusion as a result of losing some of that hair? I didn’t say it would tickle. Be that Man’s man and take it lying down. Women have been waxing for eons, just think how much more aerodynamic you will be. You don’t have to be bare with no hair. If the spa or waxing isn’t for you, or if you are on budget, pick up a Remington trimmer at Winners for $15. Stand in front of a mirror and mow. Carefully! Dr. Evil once said, “There really is nothing like a shorn scrotum... it’s breathtaking - I highly suggest you try it.” And so do I. Your girlfriend will thank you for it. Traveling north on that trimmed treasure trail, let’s manscape your torso. If a satellite could find a Mayan temple in your body hair, and the vines are sprouting over your collar, conquer the unruliness with your trimmer. Don’t grab a Bic and attack your chest in the shower. You’ll end up like that itchy twitchy poison ivy guy when the hair tries to come back - creepy. Switch up the guard on your trimmer and leave some hair on your chest. There should be something there she can trace her fingers through. Women want
a mate, not a primate. Wax your back. Maintaining that scruff on the face is easy. Letting it grow until hockey season is over may be paying homage to your team but you’ll lose out with the ladies if you look like a hobo. So sculpt your scruff. If you are short on time and have several days of growth, take two minutes and quickly shave around the neck, below the jaw and along the cheekbones sculpting the edges of the scruff. Once a week, after sculpting the edges, snap on the guard of your trimmer and quickly mow over the scruff for a nice even putting green. If the chinstrap, soul patch or goatee is your thing, be sure to avoid gold chains, pinkie rings and silk shirts. Oh, and leisure suits. Come to think of it, just avoid leisure suits all together. The frame of your face is found in your eyebrows. First and foremost, you should have two eyebrows. Suck it up and pluck. Just in the middle. Shaving is not advised. If you’ve been wearing your hair exactly the same since high school or you’ve decided to ‘try something different’ and are considering highlights, go back to the beginning of this article, do
not collect $200 and start reading again! Keep it real. Highlights shouldn’t appear like porcupine quills protruding from your skull. Ask a girl at work or your friend’s girlfriend if she could recommend a stylist. Ask the stylist for a cut where styling your hair will require minimal to no effort. If you are going for the Bieber bang or the Bon Jovi shag and are able to dry your hair out the window of the tour bus, you won’t know until it is too late how sore your neck will be from flicking your hair more often than your girlfriend. If your hair is more like Russell Brand’s, own the glam rocker appearance, get yourself a pair of second skin jeans – extra points for glitter – and steal your girlfriend’s eyeliner. Remember, too much hair product is a turn-off. Use half of what the container recommends. You don’t need an entirely new wardrobe. All a man really needs is: a couple of pairs of dark jeans, a great sweater, a few basic plain t-shirts, one very nice suit (which includes the dress shirt, tie, belt, dress socks and dress shoes), two or three button up collared shirts, a pair of casual Dockers and several pairs of new underwear. Invest in a nice watch (not ‘Swatch’) and a sexy
pair of sunglasses to create mystery and add sex appeal. Add a hat for those days when the bed head prevails and a great scarf in black, red, blue or grey for those colder days. Several women I know, including myself, allow our gaze to wander to a gentleman’s footwear in order to gauge the effort a man is willing to put in to his ‘look’. After all, the shoes complete an outfit in a woman’s opinion. The average heterosexual male’s shoe closet contains a pair of work boots, running shoes and usually a pair of outdated dress shoes in varying degrees of disrepair. The sole purpose of Town Shoes, Aldo Shoes or even the Shoe Warehouse is to provide seasons of acceptable footwear. A pair of stylish boots for those winter months or the perfect sandals for the summer season should not be limited to just one pair. Flip-flops are for the beach and bumming around town. On a day out with that special someone, upgrade to a properly soled stylish sandal. For a night out on the town, every man should have a staple pair of polished black or brown dress shoes with belts to match. Add a little spice to your life with food and culture. Rock shows and sporting events are great to attend but broaden your horizons and consider attending a cultural event like the Latino Expo and share a spicy enchilada with your novia. Take her to the ballet even if you don’t like classical music. Suggest a restaurant and make a reservation. She has been your designated driver for the Stanley Cup and Grey Cup parties, so order wine before dinner and let her drink the majority. The fact that you made the effort is paramount and will leave a lasting impression. Shows like Queer Eye for the Straight Guy and What Not to Wear have brought attention to the fact that small, consistent efforts made toward fashion, grooming, food/wine and culture can result in major alterations to current lifestyle, personal well being and even your status. A little effort goes a long way. Maintain your rough, masculine demeanour while achieving just the right essence of Metrosexuality. Consistent efforts, great or small, budget conscious or not, will only assist you with acquiring the eye of the girl you admire, bringing the latter of the term ‘Metrosexual’ to the forefront. �
ELECTRIFYING PHOTOGRAPHY BY 323PHOTOGRAFIX.COM
ANGELINE!!!!!!
AN
NGELINE AHAMKO
HERE’S A STUNNER FROM FORT MCMURRAY WHO CAN TURN YOU ON IN MORE WAYS THAN ONE. You don’t really have what we’d normally call a “girly” job, do you? I am a Journeyman Red Seal Electrician. I get up at 4am, go play in the Tar Sands with big equipment all day. It’s awesome! How the heck did you get interested in that? My parents encouraged me to pick a trade. I was doing some research on different trades at an ex-boyfriend’s house and came across the electrical trade. It looked challenging and fun, so I said, “electrical sounds interesting!” His father laughed at me and said, “You can’t do that.” Well, don’t tell me I can’t do something because I’ll prove you wrong every time ... as was the case here. So what were you doing for a living while you were going to school to become an electrician? I was apprenticing at one of the plant sites. I’d work my 40 hours a week there, then I’d tend bar three nights a week. Sometimes I’d drop one night at the bar to concentrate on school, but I still worked the Fridays and Saturdays. I bought my first home when I was in my second year of apprenticeship. I paid for school, a vehicle, a mortgage and all of life’s other bills with that job. Do the guys you work with ever give you a rough time? Not at all! When I was a wee apprentice, they’d ask me to go get tools that didn’t exist, like sky hooks and fluorescent tube benders, only I didn’t fall for it. It’s great working in a predominately male industry. I get up and I don’t have to do my makeup. If I brushed my hair with a pork chop bone that morning, I’m sure they wouldn’t even notice. Plus there’s no drama! What do you think the guys will have to say when they see your pictorial? I work with an awesome bunch of guys. I think they’ll just say “congratulations.”
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“Don’t tell me I can’t do something because I’ll prove you wrong every time.”
“If I brushed my hair with a pork chop bone, I’m sure no one would even notice.”
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CAT HAT THE
IN THE
BY BILL ROBINSON
CONCERT PHOTOS BY MIKE BRADLEY
MADONNA. STING. Cher. Prince. Ghandi. Jesus. There are so very few figures in history who are immediately identified both by their image and their singular name. VEX sat down with one of those people recently, and got a small insight into what being an iconic rock star is like. “Greatest thing about being Slash is being able to get up every night and do what I want to do, to be able to follow my passion. That being said, it can be hell going through customs.” In 2004, Time Magazine listed him as the second best guitarist of all time, second only to Jimi Hendrix. Like so much else in his life, the topic is downplayed by the introverted rock star. “I never wanted to be put on a pedestal. That makes me uncomfortable. It plays to my insecurities. Very humbling to be recognized for your art. Kids come up and say you started me playing guitar and that floors me, that’s how I came up. There are so many guitarists out there so to be recognized at all is special.” Despite his good nature and openness, you never lose sense that Slash does the interviews, allows the fame to be a part of his life, just as long as the doing of that means that he can continue to do what he does best – make and play music.
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Slash
has been around for a while now, but for those of you who doubt his cultural relevance, all you need to do is listen to him digging in to “Sweet Child O’ Mine” at the Glastonbury music festival this year. Hear 100,000 people respond to every note, every sound, every beat; feel the anthem of a generation ripple out two decades on, and you will know that true greatness, regardless of the medium, lives eternal. One would think that Slash, born Saul Hudson in 1965, was predestined for fame. His mother was a costume designer that worked with David Bowie amongst others. His father was an album cover designer. David Geffen was his neighbour growing up. Still, as a kid, Slash seemed pushed to the outside, beyond social coolness, and maybe that was a good thing. We see it time and again in our conformist society. The kids who do things a little different are kept to the periphery of any social group and yet, whose books do we read, whose clothes do we wear, whose movies do we watch, and whose music do we listen to? It’s those kids that are a little different who grow up being the ones who carve new paths. Slash was one of those kids. “When I moved to the States, I didn’t fit in. My parents were different, looser, cooler. The few friends I had growing up were outcasts like me. What made me an outcast? What drew us to each other? That question is both deep, and in my mind, the answer is very obvious. Whatever it is that draws you to somebody who doesn’t go by the normal routine of life, takes a few chances, goes out on a limb to try something different, has their own ideas – those are the people that are considered outcasts. “ NICKNAMES CAN BE A FUNNY THING. We all have those friends
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that operate by a handle not given to them by their own parents at birth. Like my friend Shayne who invariably gets introduced to people as ‘Goob’, certain people just take on nicknames that match their personalities better than their given ones. The name ‘Slash’ kind of has that feel to it. “Yeah, it was sort of a family friend who gave me the name. My best friend’s dad growing up, my parents knew him as well, was a character actor named Seymour Cassel. I was friends with his son Matt, and Seymour just used to call me Slash because I never stopped. I was always busy, hustling up whatever.” SLASH, THE IMAGE. The loose t-shirt and tight jeans, the long hair, the large dark shades, generic on anyone else, are immediately recognizable on this man. And of course, if there were one thing that symbolized Slash, other than the guitar of course, it would be his infamous top hat. Strange that we have an inattentive thrift store clerk to thank for that part of Slash’s iconic image. “The hat, I picked it up from a thrift store in Melrose. I didn’t have any money, so I put it on, walked out of the store, and waited to see if anyone was going to come after me, no one did. I wore it that night at our show and I just went with it.” As for the suggestion that he sits in a very small and unique group as someone who operates as a one-name icon, he responds, “Interesting question. I never thought about it in terms of being one of those onename famous people. From where you’re sitting, it must seem like the image and the name are an interesting combination of dynamics, but for me, it just kind of happened like it happens to anyone else. I didn’t plan it, any of it, the hat, the name, it was always just who I was. It happened naturally. It was real.” SLASH’S LATEST SOLO ALBUM shows how the man has taken a lot of the ego out of being a rock star. Most people’s egos would be raging out of control if they had musicians like Ozzy Osbourne, Kid Rock, Iggy Pop, David Grohl, and Fergie wanting to work with them on
a project. Not Slash. The mere fact that he gave free reign to each of these partners in musical creativity speaks volumes about the man’s modest self. Despite the risk of his name being the only one on the album, Slash didn’t seek to control every aspect of what would happen. “I wrote the music, whatever I felt. It was a new world for me. I’ve been in bands since I was 16, so to not be stuck in the confines of the group or band or even as an ensemble...I did the music and when it came to picking the singers, I picked whoever I thought could do an amazing job with the song. I just chose from the rolodex of singers in my brain. Any of the singers on the album in their own right are excellent singer/songwriter/lyricists, so I didn’t see any reason to try and dictate to them how they should create.” And there was an element of trust. “Absolutely. I mean, I knew who I was dealing with. Iggy Pop called and sang over the phone. That was his demo.” Loyalty and trust are big issues with Slash, especially when it comes to the music. He knows these people. He trusts these people. Some he’s known for a very long time. “Yeah, I’d met Iggy years and years ago, back when he was in Cedar’s mental institution. My mom and David Bowie went to visit him and I was at that age where she had to bring me along whenever she went somewhere. I think I was 8 or 9 and he was great. There was nothing weird about it. I’ve worked with him many times since then. Gigged with him too. It’s an honour to just know the guy.” There was one name that caught my attention when I asked if anyone had not made the cut. “(laughing) there was one song where I was thinking, ‘Axl could sing the shit out of this one’ but then I remembered that I wanted to have the record made this millennium.” AT THE MENTION OF AXL... Despite having been out of GnR for quite a while now, people still bring up the topic of Axl on a regular basis. Those days provided so many defining moments for Slash, and a lot
of people were sad to see him leave the group. “A lot of the talk about that subject is my fault. It ended badly, and I have said a lot of things in the past that just fuelled the interest. It’s fine now. I’m very conscious nowadays that I don’t want to go there. I’m looking forward.” It is important to remember that Axl and Slash were together for a very long time before the break up. “Axl and I don’t talk, but there isn’t anything negative to say now. We have a long history. He was living with me when I still lived at home with my parents. One day, I went to work and he came upstairs and passed out on my grandmother’s couch. She didn’t have anywhere to sit. So that night, while driving to band rehearsal I delicately brought up that that was rude. His reaction was to jump out of the car while it was traveling 35 mph. It was kid gloves after that. The relationship always had to be handled delicately.” Not the type to look back himself, I was happy to do it for him. Leading up to the interview, a lot of the discussion around the VEX office focused on, ‘How does he feel about them using the Guns N’ Roses name without him?’ and ‘There is no GnR without Slash’. “It wasn’t just me in that band. There were the four other guys. I think we were all equally important in making up that band. I’d say if it was ‘96 or ‘97 all over again and Duff and Matt had quit and it was just Axl and I still together, people might still call it Guns N’ Roses, but the diehard fans would have known, they still know in fact, that the only real band was when it was the five original guys.” So how then does ‘solo’ Slash compare to ‘in a band’ Slash. “It’s just different. Unlike Velvet Revolver or Guns N’ Roses or even Snakepit, I’m responsible for every aspect. I love bands...I love the band dynamic. I always listen to bands rather than individual artists coming up, but this is different because I’m the only person taking charge for putting it all together, finding a producer, the writing. It’s all a bigger risk because
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I’m putting it out there on my own. That’s what turns me on about music is the risk. Still, at the end of the day, when I put a bunch of guys together to go out on the road, I’m back in the band situation which I treat as a special situation no matter who I’m with. I don’t think I’ll ever be that one guy sitting on stage alone with an acoustic guitar.” THE MAN SEEMS MOST COMFORTABLE WHEN HE HAS A GUITAR IN HIS HANDS... He’s played for a 100,000 people at a time and he’s played for 80 at a time. I have to wonder what it is like to be standing in front of all those people who have been jonesing all day to hear him play. “I don’t know what it makes you feel like as a human being, but as a musician, I think live music is the product of the energy that people put out. When you have a 100,000 people on your side, that is a huge rush and I don’t think that there is a verbal way to describe that. Just feeling the excitement of the music you are going to present. You very much feed off the crowd’s energy – the difference between a great gig and a mediocre gig comes from the audience. You can get that same rush playing in a club for 80 people. Really, what it is, is that you like to play and the fact that people like to hear you play. Something happens, a little spark that makes it really worth all the work in bringing it all together.” ERIC LANG’S PICKUP TRUCK was the first place where I heard Slash play. His music has provided the soundtrack to very important moments in the lives of millions of people. “When I was growing up, there were certain records that you just had to have. Even now, you go to somebody’s house and you can ascertain what kind of person you are dealing with by what is in their record collection. The fact that we made an important, almost iconic record like that is the ultimate compliment, the ultimate achievement. I never set out to do that, but to know that people across the globe even now have that record as part of one of their lifeblood albums; it’s incredibly cool and moving. People always
want to know at each step of life and every new achievement, how it feels to have accomplished something. I’ve had some amazing experiences, but that album is something you can stand behind.” The man must have his own life soundtrack. “I’m open to genres. I try and appreciate all music. That’s how I was raised. There was one common denominator to the music I listen to that still holds true today. Soul. The musicians had to mean it, no matter who it was. Right now, I have to admit that most of what I listen to is still pretty old. I have problems with contemporary radio right now; it’s just too formulaic. I love what I love and I’m open to new stuff. I’m just selective. If it doesn’t move me, I’m not in.” And this drive to create music that pushes the boundaries keeps him going. “I write music because that is my passion, it’s what I love to do. But yeah, trying new ideas motivates me to keep bringing out material to hopefully feel that energy, to move people the way I feel moved by certain songs. It’s a drag that the industry plays it so safe, grinding out generic commercial music to the point where it’s all identical and everyone is sticking to a formula. You have to take risks to achieve greatness, even if it means that there are bumps along the way. It is a process that can only drive you forward if you allow it to push you outside of your comfort zone.” Slash does not have any rituals when he writes his music. “Nothing works as a routine. Whenever you try to trust a pattern of doing something, it never works the second time. You can sort of follow some basic guidelines, but there is no set way to write a song that works every single time.” BECAUSE HE LIVES AS A NORMAL GUY, Slash can relate to being a fan. Despite being incredibly famous himself, he still feels humbled when he meets certain individuals. “I met BB King once and I was frozen. I still listen to his music. Amazing.”
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And let’s not forget, this is a guy who has worked with a diverse array of artists. From Michael Jackson to Fergie, Ozzy to Elton John, Slash has had the opportunity to work with some of the best. Still, when you ask him who stands out, he doesn’t hesitate. “Funny that. The one that stands out to me really only stands out to me because it wasn’t a big commercial thing. Working with Ray Charles was the top of the heap. I was so humbled being in the same room with the guy and he took me under his wing. I worked on a bunch of stuff with him, and he just seemed to like me for some reason. He had me playing jazz. I’d have to take chord charts home with me and rehearse them, and I’d come back and record them the next day...make you a better guitarist. Any of that stuff makes you a better musician. Respect the music even if you don’t listen. Respect any music where you can feel whatever emotion or event is being shared.” THE MAN HAS LIVED A TRUE ROCK STAR LIFESTYLE. At one point in his career, when the money first started coming in, things got a little out of control. It got to the point where they put a security guard on Slash full time but trying to keep him under control in his youth was not an easy task. “It sort of became like a game. We were messed up and bored. I’d try to see how much stuff I could destroy. One time, the guard locked me in my room and stood outside in the hall until I passed out. I’d thrown a JD bottle through the TV so the guard did this crazy thing. He came into the room, took the TV, went outside so no one could see, and climbed over to the next balcony to switch the TV with the one next door. You have to understand, we were on the 11th floor. He could have died.” YOU KNOW YOU ARE A CULTURAL ICON WHEN... I was over at a friend’s house for dinner last weekend and had mentioned doing the interview with Slash. I knew it would be a great conversation starter; I hadn’t anticipated that one of them would be with my 9-year-old niece. “Slash is awesome!” she shouts from the living room at the mention of
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the guitarist. “Guitar Hero,” her father explains at the look of surprise on my face. The guy is everywhere. Spot appearances on Ellen, to a guest week on American Idol, the man is very much a part of our musical awareness. “I’m not the greatest at Guitar Hero. I’m okay, but I mean, it’s fun, I love the game. I did some music for the theme of Guitar Hero 3, and my character is in the game, and if you get to a certain point you play me in a solo contest. [Spent] hours in a mole cap suit to get it right. I draw the line at competing against myself though. Like an actor who doesn’t want to see their own films, I’m a little too introverted for that.” AND SO IT IS SOMEWHAT OF AN ACCOMPLISHMENT TO BE ABLE TO IMPRESS THIS MAN WHO HAS LIVED SO COMPLETELY. Well, if I’m going to be honest, it was my wife who impressed Slash. As I was leaving that morning before the interview, she’d handed me a sticky note with a question for him. I told her that I’d have to see how the interview went. Well, the interview went well. We talked, if not like old friends, at least very comfortably – so I took the chance on ruining my cool moment with a rock star and handed him my wife’s question. At first, I thought I’d pissed him off. He scowled at the note, looked at me, showed his security guard and then asked, “Running on a treadmill? Not walking?” I told him the truth. “Yeah, running, on like 7 out of 10 for speed.” He started to laugh. “That’s unbelievable. Do you know how many people a week tell me that they’ve beat me on Guitar Hero? It’s hard enough to beat me on medium, but to do it while running full out on a treadmill, that’s incredible. I’ve never heard of anything like that before.” And so, this master of music, this one-name icon, a man who has written the soundtrack to so many of our lives, showed just how much he has taken the ego out of rock ‘n’ roll. Despite the fame and success of it all, Slash showed that he is also just a guy who can get a good laugh from a girl beating him at Guitar Hero while running full out on a treadmill. �
HISTORY THE ROAD TO THE 98TH GREY CUP CHAMPIONSHIP
Ó
RECALLING A PAINFUL PAST On November 29th, 2009, Calgary’s McMahon Stadium was filled from end to end with little green bodies, and dotted here and there with the occasional dark blue one. It was the 97th Grey Cup game, and the Saskatchewan Roughriders and the Montreal Alouettes were preparing to square off for the CFL’s ultimate prize. Though the Alouettes came into the game as heavy
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favourites, the Roughriders bested them throughout the majority of the game. At halftime, the Riders led 17-3, and the stadium shook with the thunderous roar of the crowd. The second half fared a bit better for the Als, as they managed to tighten the gap to 27-19 with less than 10 minutes left in the game. A timely touchdown by Alouettes slotback Ben Cahoon brought the scoreboard to 27-25. There were only 2 minutes left in the game, but the touchdown gave the Als a burst of momentum.
REPEATS STORY BY ANNA SANTIAGO
PHOTOS BY MIKE BRADLEY
Then came the incident that changed the course of the game drastically. Saskatchewan was called for having too many men on the field. The 13th man, whose identity the team has kept secret to this day, was directly blamed for what happened next. As a result of the call, Montreal’s Damon Duval was set up for a 33-yard field goal. There was no time left on the clock. Every Rider fan across the nation clenched their fists and prayed: Please miss it, miss that field goal.
In one quick moment, Duval ran up and booted the ball. It sailed right between the goal posts. And there it was. The game-winning field goal that made the Montreal Alouettes the 2009 Grey Cup champions. Throughout the following year, the ghost of that 13th man would haunt the Saskatchewan Roughriders and their fans. It seemed so unfair, so unjust. But it happened, and it cost the Riders their biggest game of the year.
Ó
THERE’S A RISING IN THE EAST In the past decade, the Montreal Alouettes have made an appearance in the Grey Cup finals seven times, but only twice have they come out of it with the Grey Cup in hand. The Als were arguably the big guns in the East for the 2010 season. They dominated their division with a 12-6 record, only losing to an Eastern rival three times in nine games. Granted, one of those games turned out to be what the media deemed “the worst CFL game of the year”. Against the Toronto Argonauts on November 7th, 2010, both teams played their subs for most of the game and the Alouettes got destroyed by their opponent. The final score: 30-4 Toronto. Despite the embarrassment of that particular game, the Als maintained their top-dog status. Unfortunately, the team was not without their share of troubles. 38-year-old quarterback Anthony Calvillo’s tenure in the CFL was beginning to come into question. His wife had suffered a bout of cancer and Calvillo himself was speculated to be having health issues. Whatever he was going through emotionally and physically, it was still a pretty good season for Calvillo, who threw 32 touchdowns and ran a collective 107 rushing yards. And Ben Cahoon made history in early October when he became the CFL’s all-time reception leader.
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The Alouettes found themselves facing the Toronto Argonauts for a chance to get to the Grey Cup for the second year in a row. At the Olympic Stadium in Montreal, the Alouettes made it look easy against the Argos, though the game wasn’t without its setbacks. Alouettes’ safety Matthieu Proulx was forced to leave the game early in the first half after sustaining an injury after a tackle. The injury was minor, however, and Proulx was expected to be ready for action in a few days. Not one turnover, and exceptional performances by running back Avon Cobourne and slotback Jamel Richardson contributed to the Als’ 48-17 win. At the end of the night, the Montreal Alouettes found themselves on their way to another Grey Cup final. In a few hours they would learn which team in the West they would be battling for the chance to lift the coveted cup. Whoever it would be, the Als were determined to prove to Canadian football fans that their 2009 win was not a fluke; that their team has what it takes to be CFL champions.
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HOW THE WEST WAS WON The Saskatchewan Roughriders entered the 2010 season with a bit of a chip on their shoulder. Their loss the previous year weighed heavily on their minds. Regardless, the Rider Nation was determined to redeem themselves. This would be their year. But first, they would have to weather their way past three very good teams in the West. At the top of that list were the Calgary Stampeders, led by a rejuvenated and resolute Henry Burris. They played each other three times during the regular season, and each time the Stamps got to claim the victory. In fact, the Stamps continuously found themselves at the top of the standings, coming out of the regular season with a conference-best record of 13-5. The Saskatchewan Roughriders had themselves a pretty good regular season too, despite cornerback Omarr Morgan’s rib injury and linebacker Barrin Simpson’s ankle injury. Slotback Andy Fantuz received the Outstanding Canadian Award three times for the months of July, September and October. And quarterback Darian Durant shone over any other quarterback in the West, with 618 rushing yards and reeling in 32 touchdowns. Not surprisingly, it was the Stamps and the Riders who ended up going head to head for the division championship title. The game was
scheduled to be played in Calgary, where Mother Nature seemed determined to make it as difficult as possible for the players to play to the best of their ability. Snow fell throughout the game, and the bitter cold tested the stamina of both the teams and the loyal fans who sat shivering in the stands. Nonetheless, the game went on, and what a game it was. Despite having the home-field advantage, it was far from a cakewalk for the Stampeders. The scoreboard remained close throughout the majority of the game, with the Stamps maintaining the lead for the entire first half. But two touchdowns in the second half gave the Roughriders the boost they needed, though not without some controversy. The Riders were able to maintain possession of the ball even after a fumble by running back Wes Cates, a decision that the Stamps and their fans were furious about. In the end, the scoreboard read in favour of the Riders, with a final score of 20-16. Bad refereeing or not, the Saskatchewan Roughriders emerged from the game as the Western Division champions, and now the stage was set for the biggest game of the year. It was time for Rider redemption.
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RIDERS vs. ALS: TAKE 2
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The location was different but the teams were the same. It was the 98th Grey Cup final and once again, it was the Roughriders vs. the Alouettes. It would be the 18th Grey Cup game played for both franchises. Roughriders fans from all over the country made the journey to Edmonton in hopes of getting their revenge against the team that virtually stole the championship from their hands. Everywhere you looked, there was a man, woman or child covered head to toe in green. Signs that read “Redemption” were rampant. There was no sky of blue that day, but there sure was a sea of green. You could feel it in the air; the Riders wanted this cup and they would do anything to get it. Montreal drew first blood by scoring a touchdown nine minutes into the first quarter. The stadium grew considerably quiet, and quieter still when Riders’ defensive back Leron Mitchell went down minutes after with a knee injury. He left the game and did not return. The Riders fought back by scoring a touchdown and closed out the first with a score of 8-7 Montreal. A series of successful field goals by both teams kept the score neckin-neck throughout the next two quarters. By the end of the third quarter, it was 11-11. Now this was a good game. The beginning of the fourth saw a surge of energy and confidence in the Montreal team. They exploded onto the field and scored a field goal and a touchdown before the 10-minute mark. Less than 5 minutes left in the game, the score was 21-11 Montreal, and the stadium was nearly silent. Not a team to give up so easily, Saskatchewan bounced back with a touchdown by offensive lineman Marc Parenteau. Unfortunately, a solid defense by the Montreal Alouettes stymied the
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Roughriders, and by the last minute of the game, coach Marc Trestman was already getting doused by celebratory barrels of Gatorade. With a final score of 21-18, the Montreal Alouettes celebrated their second consecutive Grey Cup win in an almost-empty stadium, but that didn’t faze the team. “Aw man, it feels great,” said a breathless Jamel Richardson, who nabbed the game’s Most Valuable Player award. It may have been tough to play in front of a stadium that was 95% pro-Riders, but Richardson held no bitterness. “Their fans are great!” An emotional Anthony Calvillo revealed post-celebration that he had indeed been battling health issues, when earlier in the season, doctors found a lesion in his thyroid that could possibly be cancerous. The decision he made not to have surgery until after the post-season proved to be a good one. “Now that I don’t have football to look forward to, now I can look forward to getting this surgery done,” he said. “It’s been a long year for me. But the only thing on my mind now is to enjoy this victory, enjoy my family and also get this thing taken care of as soon as possible.” It was a hard-fought game, and Riders coach Ken Miller drew a bit of comfort from the fact that this loss was not a result of a crucial mistake on his team’s end. “I’m really proud of my players, and we battled a really good Montreal football team,” said Miller. The 69-year-old stepped down from the head coach position days after the loss, but chose to remain with the team as the vice-president of football operations. “After you lose a game like this, you know, I’d like another shot at it.” The Riders did not get their redemption this year, but the Alouettes managed to prove to doubters that they had the skill and the grit to capture themselves another championship victory. �
Mike Labinjo spotlight INTERVIEW BY ANNA SANTIAGO PHOTO BY MARK G. BILODEAU
PREDICTION: WATCH FOR THIS 288LB DL IN THE NEXT SEASON OF BATTLE OF THE BLADES. YOU HEARD IT HERE FIRST! How do you spend your offseason? Well, I used to live in the States, so when I first moved here I used to go back quite a bit. But now I bought a house here in Calgary, so this year I’m staying in town, keep doing my rehab and get better for next season. Any fun memories from your time in the NFL? I think being in Philly was probably the most interesting. This was when Terrell Owens was on our team. He wanted me to get him some donuts after practice one day. I was at the computer writing my mom an email, and I said, “Yeah, just give me a second.” Then one of his little lackeys started chirping, “Hey Binjo, go get him that donut,” but I ignored him. From that day on there was a kind of understanding between me and him, and I guess as the season went on I earned his respect. He came up to me one day and apologized, and next thing I know he’s inviting me to a private party at his house, which was very interesting ... but I can’t really say what was going on in that house though. (laughs) You’ve had a lot of injuries the last few seasons. This is the third year that I’ve been injured. Every year it’s been kind of like some freak
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injury. I think the first time I got injured I tried to rush it back. I was lifting weights earlier than I was supposed to and I didn’t do things the right way. This year the doctors want me to take my time to recover. I’m gonna do things a lot slower. Do you think you could have made a difference had you not been injured during the playoffs? Yeah, I feel like I’m a differencemaker on the team when given the right opportunity to do what I can do. It’s tough when you’re standing on the sidelines and you’re watching what’s going on and you can’t be a part of that. What did you think of the atrocious calls made during the Western Final? The refs had a huge impact on that game and its unfortunate. I hate to say that’s the reason why we lost, but even [Mark] Cohon said that it would be better for the league if the Riders won the Grey Cup ... which is like ... what the hell?! When you hear that, I feel like they almost wanted them to have a chance to redeem themselves against Montreal. Better story line, I guess. I just hope someone’s evaluating that game, and the calls that the refs made. What do you think of those
crazy Rider fans? It’s a weird thing, to have more than half your stadium in green at a home game, but their fans are really passionate. I remember the first time I played here, some of the guys were telling me, “Get ready for the Saskatchewan game, the fans are crazy,” and I didn’t believe it but when you get here and all you see is green, it’s tough. I’d almost rather play them on the road, because for some reason the fans that come to Calgary for the game are more rowdy. What was with that scuffle with some of the Eskimos earlier in the season? You know what? It was just one of those games. We were first place ... they were last. And every time we play these guys it’s always a huge battle. I remember the play. Who was the wide receiver? ... I think it was [Andre] Talbot, and it was a screened pass. I was running to make the pass and he tried to block me. I’m twice his size, so obviously I’m gonna run him over. So while I’m running at him he tries to rip my face mask off and took a swing at my head. Then another guy came and took a swing at me and then all hell broke loose. I just think emotions were high. We were beating them pretty bad at that point, and I think that he’d just had enough of the beat-
down. One thing led to another and the next thing you know it was the fight seen across Canada. Any regrets about it? Nope. If it happened again, I’d be there again. Any hidden talents outside of football? Hidden talents? Well, I used to play hockey back in the day. I played good. I like to call myself the black Wayne Gretzky, but that’s more self-proclaimed than anything. Oh, and I used to play the violin when I was younger. I stopped when I was fifteen though. Seriously? The violin? Do you still play? I try to. Whenever I go back home to visit my mom, she always hands me the violin and tries to get me to start playing. She always wanted me to keep playing but sports took over and sadly, violin got bumped out of the way. Is it true you’re a Leafs fan? Yeah, I gotta be, even as bad as they are ... like getting that thrashing from Edmonton. Did you watch that? That was brutal! If they asked me to play, I’d come suit up for them. I’d make some fire out there. I love playing hockey.
fox hunting
Morning Dove Meetoos KEEP THIS ULTRA-SEXY GYMNAST’S PICTORIAL ON YOUR BEDSIDE TABLE AND WE’LL GUARANTEE EVERY MORNING WILL BE AN OUTSTANDING MORNING!
As a gymnast, you must be pretty flexible. (laughs) I definitely am. I actually just learned how to do both front and back hand springs. How are you planning to put these wonderful tumbling skills to good use? I’m going to be trying out for the Edmonton Eskimos Cheer Team! I’m pretty confident and I know I’m gonna make it. (laughs) It should be a lot of fun. There are tons of perks to being a cheerleader. So is cheer leading the main goal or do you have other aspirations? Right now I’m going to school at Marvel College for hairdressing. There’s a lot more than I thought there was to just cutting and styling hair! (laughs) I’m hoping to open my own salon one day, after I get a few years of experience. As for the cheer leading ... we’ll just have to see what happens and where it takes me. I do plan on staying around for a while, after I make the team, that is. Your own salon sounds challenging. Are you taking any business courses? When I was in high school, I won a scholarship from CIBC Bank and the Big Brothers and Big Sisters program, so I’ll be taking an entrepreneurial course when I’m finally done at Marvel. Then I plan on going to Grant MacEwan to take their business course. It’s our understanding that you’re one of God’s finest Cree-Asians. (laughs) Yeah, I guess. My dad is Vietnamese and my mom is aboriginal.
PHOTOGRAPHY BY COLIN SMITH
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A Postcard From Rapid City › BY JOE VESPAZIANI
I’ve never been a huge believer in psychic abilities or John Edwards or whatever, but in ‘89 I had an experience in Rapid City, South Dakota that tugged my mind. A little background info is useful before we jump into this one... I had been clean for a couple of years. Pills, pot and alcohol were my forte. I knew I was in serious trouble when a giant lizard head wearing an RCMP hat waved me through a check stop in Calgary. I owed God a little sobriety for that one. The first few months were the toughest. I had reoccurring dreams of being beaten to death in a hotel room by a strange couple. I also had a hard time with mirrors – I covered them for fear of what I might see. Being raised Catholic (and having attended a Catholic high school) the devil managed to steal a scene or two in my nightmares. Not a good time. Not my happy
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place. I was on the road in Rapid City, South Dakota. By dropping the name of the town I’m not looking for overkill. At this point, you know I’m a big star in the smaller markets. This was back when I saddled up on stage to Bon Jovi’s “Wanted Dead or Alive” cloaked in my silver duster, matching slacks, wrestling boots and Whitesnake puffy hair. All I was missing was an act. I was a late ‘80s standup badass. Don’t heckle me or I’ll jump off the stage baby! See these boots? I was performing and staying at an historic hotel in downtown Rapid City. Stories abound of spirits walking the halls nightly. Apparently you can check out any time you like, but you can never leave. Whatever. If there were spirits, I’m sure the tiled swastikas in the ceiling would keep them at bay. I was told the tiled pattern was a Native Indian symbol – harmless. Explain that to the Jewish
tourists. Rapid City: gateway to Rushmore (and even those big heads look bored). I was headlining the gig, which meant I got the room next to the ice machine. (Wake up calls are for pussies.) On arrival there was a message for me at the front desk. I thought it was a radio interview. It turned out to be my ‘psychic’ friend. She told me I was in great danger and that I would be dead by the end of the night. Knowing the South Dakota crowds I figured she was right. I hung up after listening to five minutes of this babble. All the while waiting to hear, “just kidding, Jeff told me to do this to you. Come down to the station – we’ll record a teaser and I’ll give you a t-shirt.” There was no interview. There was no t-shirt. Knowing you might die by nightfall, most people would try to fit as much in as possible. I napped after a light workout and enjoyed what was supposed to be my last meal at
comic stripped
the overpriced hotel restaurant. Maybe they should forgo the toothpicks with the coloured wrapping on one end, and just lay the club sandwich flat. Pass the savings on to you. I napped again before reviewing my notes. After masturbating in the shower (this hotel had shampoo AND conditioner!), I was ready to give the peeps what they paid for. I might have known something strange was going to happen when the tape player ate my Bon Jovi intro. I did my best to perform stand-up after a guy who balances a wheelbarrow on his chin while juggling knives. Who wants to listen after seeing all that shiny shit fly around? As I’m plodding along, I see some sort of aura around this one woman in the balcony. My attention is drawn in that direction several times and I became anxious. I left the stage to a smattering of polite applause that is usually reserved for the last competitor crossing the line at the Special O sack race. The MC busied himself with a crowd participation joke-off. (The winner got a t-shirt from a local radio station!) I was standing in the lobby defending my bit about using mass murderers on death row for science to the brother of an inmate, when she comes over and stares right through me.
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WITH JOE VESPAZIANI
The next part is very blurred and I would need to read the police report to remember exactly, but here’s the basic gist... One minute I was waiting for the tour manager to pay me and possibly save me from this crazy person. The next thing I know I’m up in my headlining suite next to the ice machine. There is a lovely view of the long hallway. (Hey, I’m the headliner.) I remember asking, “how did we get here?” She whispered something about the devil being inside me and he was going to have me killed. She whispered this in all seriousness and all the while she’s undressing. Now she stood in front of me completely naked. I said, “I’m not fucking you.” Next thing I know, a struggle ensued. I was wrestling some strong naked woman from the Dakota’s! The phone rang. I grabbed it quickly before she could get up off the floor. A garbled voice on the other end giggled while informing me that I was going to die. I hung up. She started to scream, “he knows you’re here! We need to leave!” She lunged for the phone. I moved to the side, tripping her to the floor. I stepped on her arm while she was down in order to immobilize her and called security. I was fighting for my life, in the dream with the hotel
room and a strange couple, and me with the devil inside. The sheriff (who was also hotel security) wrestled the woman to the bed, calming her down enough to walk her out as I repeated over and over, “I didn’t fuck her...” The sheriff escorted her down the hall covered with a blanket. Doors were opening and characters from the Ice Capades were milling around. Smurfs, fairies, elves and animals all shuffled their way through the hall carrying skates. I had heard they were in town, but had no idea we were sharing the same hotel. I wonder what kind of applause they received while leaving the ice? This was all too surreal. A half hour later the sheriff came back for a visit. He told me that his deputy had taken the hysterical woman home. They had to carry her from the lobby as she pleaded with them to believe that I had the devil in me. She lived at an address suspected of cult activity. The sheriff then handed me the day’s paper. In it, there was a picture of a young guy who was unearthed in New Mexico - a victim of some cult ritual. His picture was next to the ad for my show. We looked like brothers! The sheriff smirked, and with a high pitched giggle said, “Spooky, eh?” �
TABLE TALKIN’ WHAT DO BUSINESS AND POKER HAVE IN COMMON? NETWORKING, TAKING RISKS, AND THE ALL-MIGHTY DOLLAR!
♠
Sitting around the poker table, it never ceases to amaze me how diverse the playing field is. I have played with doctors, lawyers, students, athletes, real estate agents, accountants, teachers, and the list goes on and on. All in all, I have met some very interesting people and even made a few new friends. If you haven’t already noticed, let me tell you. Poker is a great place to network. It’s like the new golf. I have assisted a few companies in organizing charity fundraising events in which they invite their top clients to enjoy a meet and greet with other companies that they do business with and furthermore, get to know the people they are dealing with. Since poker is a highly social activity, maybe holding private events such as these is a sensible, and fun, light-hearted scheme to learning more about your colleagues and associates. Poker is also a very useful tool to tweak your networking skills. Networking has been named one of the single most important key elements to success in the business world. Being successful at networking and dealing with people can not only help you in business, but also help your poker career. It has been said that poker players can be divided up by their poker personality. The more networking you do, the more comfortable you will become at recognizing certain characteristics that will help you to read your opponent at the poker table, as well as in the business world.
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As I sit and observe the players, I sometimes find myself wondering what each of these players do for a living, and what their home life is like. Call me creepy or nosy, but you can tell a lot about a person, just by asking about what they do at their job, and what their relationship status is. Are they happily married? Do they have kids? Are they in a position of authority? Do they work in sales? Is their job technical? Knowing little facts about your opponents could help you to discover their poker personality. I believe that people play poker like they live their life. Do they save a little and spend a lot? Are they willing to risk it all? Do they care about their personal appearance? Do they lie for a living? How comfortable are they with it? Not only will knowing simple little facts about their personal or professional life give you some insight to their personality, but watching them and their actions and mannerisms, and the way they talk can also help you to understand them better. Understanding them may help you to decipher how they play poker in general. Poker is not just a game of cards, but a game of people where cards are involved. You need to understand the player to understand how they play the game. This is tough to do when each person at the table may be a total stranger, so making small talk may be in your best interest. Besides, I have heard of people acquiring jobs, and receiving services from the person sitting next them, after an evening of making small talk. You may learn that your neighbour is someone who can
valerie ross further launch your career, or possibly help you with something that is pending that you have been putting off. Here is a list of the Top 10 Tips for Successful Networking. How do these tips relate to poker and how could you apply these tips to encourage your poker success? 1. Recognize the importance of networking. In poker, there is a vast field of individuals that could enhance your professional career somehow. By getting to know them, you lose nothing. Ask any successful business person and they will tell you that above all else networking skills are absolutely vital to grow your business. Networking can increase your market share, help you gain new ideas, provide work and perspectives on life and business. Speaking to one person can potentially give you access to an unexpected opportunity. 2. Aim to become visible. Holding a charity event or private poker tournament for business partners and associates can definitely help to boost your popularity. You need to let others know you exist and what you do by becoming highly visible and being set apart from the crowd, which is what good networking skills can provide. Be seen and get known. 3. Take care of your image. To have success in networking you need to maintain your self-esteem and build your confidence. Consider how you dress, speak and maintain your body language; aim to present a professional, positive image. 4. Always be positive! Could the law of attraction also work while playing poker? By having an open “can do” positive attitude and having the belief in giving and sharing as well as offering assistance, your reputation will soon grow, and maybe your chip stack will grow with it. 5. Treat all events as networking. Going into a specific networking event you may experience fear and trepidation but there is also the thrill and challenge of who you might potentially meet. The networks we belong to may include schools, colleges, work, social life, small businesses, corporate businesses, family, neighbors, advisors, the church, and certainly poker is a huge network of people. Poker is a great place to meet people and build mutually beneficial relationships. 6. Build your relationships. You need to project a strong respectable image. Don’t forget your most powerful contact might not be the most useful to you. Above all be genuine. You should take an interest in everyone you meet, remember their name, listening acutely to them will help you understand their needs and how you could assist each other. Tact, reassurance and the building of trust are also the hallmarks and
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vital components of relationship building and setting the stage for a big bluff. 7. Develop the ability to “small talk”. This has proven to be an extremely useful tool in poker. Being able to talk to anyone about anything is a valuable skill in its own right and essential in networking. Being able to initiate a conversation means you are more likely to come into contact with people who may well turn out to be invaluable contacts. 8. Develop active listening skills. Listening is the key to effective communication. Networking is not about selling, it is about listening to the other person and showing them you are interested in them by active listening. Allow others to open up and talk freely. You can learn a lot from hearing what they have to say. 9. Use your business card. I can’t tell you how many times I have exchanged business cards with people whom I could potentially do business with. With the many people you meet, this is the only way to maintain the initial contact. 90% of businesses have no card and only 25% have a card that is up to date and informative. At the very least, your own should have on it your name, address and phone number, and ideally your email address, if not your website. 10. Be organized. This last tip may or may not be effective in poker... but it is a great networking tip in business. Keep a written list or database of everyone you know and everyone you meet and what they do. Write memory joggers on the back of business cards. You may find it useful to keep a diary of who you meet and where and any mutual contacts for future reference. For most of the playing field, poker is primarily a hobby or interest for leisure. Although we would all like to win the WSOP main event, I like to believe that we play within our means, and we have fun doing it. Part of the fun is getting to know the people you are playing with! So have fun and enjoy exercising your networking skills while you are at the poker table. You never know who you are going to meet! Thank you all for your continued support. I look forward to hearing from you all. If you have any comments, questions, or requests, please feel free to email me at valerie@vexmagazine.com or Valerie Ross (White) at Facebook.com ‘Till next time. Don’t forget to tip your dealers and wait staff, as they work very hard to make your playing experience a pleasant one. May you be blessed with good health and good luck!
Valerie Ross
CHECKING IN The right hotel (and the right companion) can either make or break your next trip. ALL FEATURED CLOTHING AVAILABLE AT FORMANS FASHION GROUP AND FORBIDDEN CLOTHING IN CALGARY, AB.
SHOT ON LOCATION AT HOTEL ARTS IN CALGARY, ALBERTA. PHOTOGRAPHY BY COLIN SMITH FASHION DESIGN BY SIMONE SKAFF AND TANIA FRANKLIN MODELS: JODI AND SIDNEY
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parting shot
Sasha Staden
One look at this gorgeous nursing student from Edmonton and basketball probably wouldn’t be the first thought to pop into your head. But don’t kid yourself, this hottie of the hardwood could take most of your sorry asses to school. So you’re quite the basketball player, are you? I haven’t played in a while but back in the day I used to be pretty good. I played for provincial teams and even tried out for Team Canada. I have the Canadian national basketball symbol tattooed on the back of my leg. What position did you play? Shooting guard. I was a bit too short for other positions. Were you a starter or strictly bench material? It took me awhile to get my confidence, but I eventually had a breakthrough game where I scored 27 points. After that I became one of the top three scorers in British Columbia and was awarded Rookie of the Year. Who was your favourite player? Michael Jordan! My mom decorated my room Chicago Bulls style. I even had a life size MJ cut out! Do you know what’s up with the Hitler-stache he’s sporting in the latest Hanes commercial? Hey, it’s Michael Jordan. He can do whatever he wants. Maybe he was supporting Movember?
PHOTOGRAPH BY 323PHOTOGRAFIX.COM
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