May 2022

Page 40

LIFESTYLE

MYTH: If you feel like you’d “get too attached” you wouldn’t be a good candidate to do foster care. FACT: All children deserve someone who loves them wholeheartedly and without reserve, a fan who thinks they are the most amazing human being on the planet. The love we give them is a gift with no strings. And the Lord heals that place in our heart and prepares it for a new life who needs to be loved in a traumatic situation. In other words: it’s not about saving ourselves… it’s about ministering to them. Get too attached!

FACT VS. MYTH Local foster parents share the inside scoop on what’s real and what’s simply a myth!

MYTH: Foster parents are always aware of children they are getting. FACT: Emergency placement of a child can happen anytime - midnight, 5am, 2pm, whenever. There is not always a warning or plan to receiving a child. Foster parents fill a void in a crucial time and have a lot on them to give a safe, loving environment to a child who has been removed from a difficult situation. MYTH: If you ask all of the right questions, you’ll know everything about the child you are getting.

MYTH: I can’t be a foster parent because I don’t want to deal with the separation after the child is moved. FACT: Many foster parents maintain a relationship with their foster child/children well into their adulthood. MYTH: DSS covers all the needs for children that are placed into foster care. FACT: DSS provides assistance but normally it isn’t until weeks after the child is placed. Foster parents have to immediately clothe, provide childcare, and anything else for that child until the government assistance kicks in. MYTH: You need to make a certain amount of money, be a certain age, and be married in order to be a foster parent. FACT: You just need to have a willingness in your heart and love for the children. Contributors: Deborah, Sarah, Shenedra, Shannon, Taylor, Cheri, Kace, Ryan, and other anonymous parents

FACT: The child will be the opposite of everything on the list you wrote down. Be flexible. MYTH: When you get a child from foster care, the state pays for everything. FACT: A child often comes with nothing, as a newborn, or with items that can’t be used. The state gives you $100. For a teen, that will buy shoes. For a newborn, bottles and one can of formula. You will need to be able and willing to help with your own resources. Starting out, I sold almost all of my valuables so I would have extra. On top of that, I used the Foster Care Clothing Closet (FCCC). Without the help of the FCCC for the three newborns, two year old, and four month old I got in the first two years, I don’t know what I would have done. Getting started is the hardest part. After that, it’s easier. But having the benefit of the FCCC for items only used for short periods of time is invaluable. MYTH: I commonly hear, “I could never do it; I would get too attached.” That is by far the biggest myth when it comes to foster care. FACT: I always say, if you do not get attached, you’re doing it wrong. When the time comes, the pain will be there. However, you find joy in knowing you created stability and love, and helped heal trauma in a rough patch of a child’s life. MYTH: I’ll never be able to be a shared parent; I’m too angry with the biological parents. FACT: I love the mother of my foster children and we have a very healthy relationship.

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May 2022


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