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departments Founder and Editorial Director Verna V. Nickelberry Editor-In-Chief Sharon Locklear Art Director Rushun Wiseman https://creavolutionarts.com Contributing Writers Vanderbilt Brabson Jeanette Chestnut-Chester Teresa Jordan Paola Tennon Photographers Kimberly Taylor Kendall Elem ‘Advertise With Us� Please Contact Us At (770) 767-0649 O.P. Magazine Mail P.O. Box #19699 Atlanta, GA 30327 (770) 767-0649 http://ordinarypeoplemagazine ORDINARY PEOPLE MAGAZINE is a quarterly publication and is distributed in Atlanta, GA, Memphis, TN; K noxville, TN; Matteson, IL.
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contents spring 2020
08
ON THE COVER Pastor Matthew Brown
11 JUST TO ENCOURAGE YOU 14 EDITOR-IN-CHIEF Sharon E. Locklear
Jeanette Chestnut-Chester
18 24 HER FASHION /HIS STYLE FOR YOUR HEALTH 28 IN THE SPOTLIGHT
34 0 36 SMALL BUSINESS CORNER GOSPEL ARTISTS 40 MIND YOUR MONEY
DeLayna Michele Elliott
Wendy Peterson & Unity
42
Decisions and Life Choices
32
STYLE CONFIDENCE Courtney Robinson
All rights reserved.Reproduction in whole or in part without the founder/editor’s consent is strictly prohibited. The opinions expressed herein are exclusively those of the writers and do not necessarily reflect the positions or views of the editor. The publication of any advertisement in the issue does not constitute an endorsement of the advertiser’s products or services by the publication. © 2020 Ordinary People Magazine VeMaShe’ Enterprise LLC
6 | Spring 2020
You Can Make It: A Testimony of Hurt and Healing
Sylvia Vines
Utilizing Wisdom to Make Health
MIRACLES AND BLESSINGS
46
CONSIDER THIS
51
INSPIRATIONAL WORDS
53
FROM WITHIN...
The Most Important Thing
Psalms 34 (KJV)
Verna V. Nickelberry
18
08
28
46
42 40 51
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On The Cover
ON THE C OVER COVER INFORMATION Pastor Matthew Brown believes at the heart of every individual lies a reservoir of significance imprinted on their DNA to create life altering possibilities for sustainable transformation. A fourth generation Church of God in Christ member, he has distinguished himself as a servant-leader in the local, district, jurisdiction and national church for over 40 years. Pastor Matthew Brown, Th.D., is an unequivocal Christian with a vast experience, similar to the biblical Joseph, in government and public administration. He is corporate trained, and educated in civic, social, secular and sacred institutions in his community. It is this eclectic collection of experiences that has served him well in faith, corporate and community engagements. Pastor Brown embraces the missional mandate to significantly assist churches, organizations and communities in their specific distinction of service, development
8 | Spring 2020
and transformation to the locales they serve. He has committed his life to Servant Leader principles which he’s shared for over 30 years with diverse communities, faiths and business leaders. His commitment to providing a local distinctive service signature, which he aptly names Blue Water Ministry and Development, emanates from a deeply nourished conviction formed as he served underserved communities in his native Buffalo, New York. Pastor Brown motivates ministries, trains leaders, collaborates and partners with communities to achieve collective benefits for others. He has proven his exceptional skills as a public speaker, leader, strategist, coach and facilitator through the implementation and administrations of many strategic ministry and community initiatives. Accomplished in his field, endorsed by his colleagues, and invited to inspire many in various parts of the world, Pastor Brown has harnessed his passion into a service modality that informs, empowers and inspires leaders,
organizations and communities to unleash their powerful possibilities from their reservoir of significance, and create transformational enterprises which inspire the communities they serve and bless the worlds they’ve been called to change. As a Distinctive Strategist, he introduces latent dreams and stagnant realities to powerful possibilities. He coaches you to level up to your ordained potential and maximize your distinctive self while positioning you to live freely in that creative space. His focus is on helping others transform their exhausted life space into vibrant distinctions of creative nuance which allows you to live on the other side of what others may call normal. He empowers individuals to rise above mediocrity as they cultivate an exciting life which calls them powerfully into action! He’ll teach practical principles which empowers one’s ability to courageously embrace challenges that accompany sustainable life transformations. At times, this may seem difficult but we learn that difficult is doable when we Lift Expectations to Accelerate Possibilities L.E.A.P. Matthew has been teaching, living and loving the wonder of my distinction for decades. Our distinction is a personal significance and gifting we imprint on the world. Having conquered his own battles not to settle for what others believe he deserves or become what others imagine, he actively lives in his own distinctive space and is excited to help you develop yours! Today, he’s a pastor, national trainer, sought-after speaker, mentor, author and certified John Maxwell Team coach. He loves people, just like you, who are ready to do the work which lights them up! He’s certain you desire to reconnect to your authentic purpose in life and fulfill its life mission to the world. He’s a proud father, grandfather, mentor and friend to many around the world. His life’s mission is to be the possibility of global transformation, instant action and cause in the matter of his own life. He’s demonstrated ministry professionalism and organizational excellence as he endeavors to bring kingdom to community while staying in the face of God! He believes you are ready. If your interest is sparked and you want to learn more about how to become, distinctively you, he has a page for that, www.mlbministries.com ordinarypeoplemagazine | 9
Letters to the Editor
Letters to the
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Loving your cover, what an awesome picture W IN
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of you and your grandchildren!
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- Barbara I so enjoyed reading the Spotlight story of
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- Lynn
You look beautiful surrounded by your grandchildren on the cover. Love it! - Courtney
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Editor-in-Chief
WISDOM AND FOO LISHNE SS BY SHARON E. LOCKLEAR, EDITOR-IN-CHIEF Although the selected scripture for the quarter is Ecclesiastes 2: 14-15, I chose to use verses 13 & 14 and it reads as follow. 13 Then I saw that wisdom excels folly as light excels darkness. 14 The wise man’s eyes are in his head, But the fool walks in darkness. Yet I myself perceived That the same event happens to them all. Light, darkness, wisdom, foolishness, events – apply to the Christian and non- Christian. The separation between the Christian and nonChristian is wisdom and light. Christians walk in light and wisdom because we know GOD and Jesus Christ is our Savior. Christians live in truth, light and wisdom because we have embodied Jesus Christ in our lives. We live in love for GOD, self, family and others. Our walk, talk, behavior and attitudes proclaim that we are in this world but not of this world.
The wise should look different from the foolish, our demeanors should not be the same and we should not operate the same. Christian life and living are exemplary, we are examples of how life is to be lived. This does not mean that Christians do not make mistakes or poor decisions. Christians strive toward perfection in all areas of life. The one thing that all people, Christian and non-Christian have in common is death. None of us will get out of life alive. Death is the great equalizer and the common denominator for all souls. Death is the same event for each of us. Allow the life you live to speak volumes. Spread light, love and wisdom to everyone you meet. People need you.
ordinarypeoplemagazine | 11
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About the Author Ms. Nickelberry is the Founder and Editorial Director of Ordinary People Magazine (OPM) an inspirational magazine that showcase the stories and efforts of communities and charities. Ms. Nickelberry continuously serves others through sharing her confident spirit and the word of God. In her spare time, she enjoys reading, sewing, crocheting, and writing. Ms. Nickelberry currently resides in Atlanta, Georgia
Word Search
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ACTS GALATIANS JOHN MARK PHILIPPIANS
COLOSSIANS HEBREWS JUDE MATTHEW REVELATION
EPHESIANS JAMES LUKE PHILEMON TITUS
ordinarypeoplemagazine | 13
Just to Encourage
JUST TO ENC OURAGE YOU BY JEANETTE CHESTNUT-CHESTER, WORSHIP LEADER, CERTIFIED PERSONAL TRAINER
The wisdom of King Solomon is unquestioned and undisputed. We know from the Book of 1st Kings that Solomon was the 3rd King of Israel. The crown was placed on his head by his father, King David, who was the 2nd King of Israel. We remember that King David was a man after God’s own heart. Therefore, we can believe that he trained his son up in the ways of the Lord. King Solomon penned this very truth in Proverbs 22:6.
14 | Spring 2020
King Solomon followed after his father in many ways. He was crowned king at an early age by King David and approved by God. It is estimated that Solomon was around the age of 20 when he began to rule as king over Israel. Solomon knew that this was a monumental task. However, he knew and relied on the God of his father, King David. Solomon followed closely after God as David did. He was taught that God could be relied on, and that He would always support those that followed His ways, and walked in them. Solomon knew that in order to lead the people of God, he
would have to have wisdom, the wisdom that comes from God only. This is the wisdom that says “Trust in the Lord with all your heart, lean not unto your own understanding, acknowledge the Lord in all your ways and He will direct your path: Proverbs 3:5-6.
David. But I am only a little child and do not know how to carry out my duties. When we come to God humbly, and admit that we need help, the Lord is faithful and He will help us. He will help us when our ways please Him. Solomon’s ways pleased the Lord.
This wisdom and so much more was given to Solomon because he asked the Lord for it. Solomon admitted his naiveté to God, he did not presume that just because his father was the king, he would know what to do and how to lead the people of God. This is the attitude we all should have when leading the ones God has given us charge over.
Solomon admitted that he was a little apprehensive regarding the task ahead of him, he saw himself as a little child, not equipped to lead this great and numerous people, Israel. He asked for a decerning heart to govern the people of God, and to distinguish between right and wrong. The Bible says that this request pleased the Lord so much that He said to Solomon, “I will do what you have asked. I will give you a wise and discerning heart, so that there will never have been anyone like you, nor will there ever be. Moreover, I will give you what you have not asked for-both wealth and honor-so that in your lifetime you will have no equal among kings. “There have been several kings during the Kingdom Reign, but none so full of wisdom as King Solomon.
Solomon offered sacrifices to the Lord, just as he had been taught, and God saw and honored his sacrifice.
“Let me encourage you with this truth, for as with King Solomon, his wisdom remained with him; a strong understanding, with great human knowledge. ”
God then said to Solomon “ask for whatever you want, and I (God) will give it to you”. 1King 3:5b. Solomon was not pompous, nor was he arrogant. He reminded the Lord of the kindness the He had shown to his father, King David, and he was grateful that the Lord had continued to show this same kindness to him. Solomon could have asked the Lord for anything, his request could have been one of selfish delight, however, he asked for nothing such as wealth and fame. Solomon asked the Lord to grant him wisdom to lead God’s people! How awesome is that! He also admitted his need for God, in this statement, “1 Kings 3:7 “Now, LORD my God, you have made your servant king in place of my father
Referred to in some translations as The Teacher, and others as The Preacher does not make a lot of difference, for the wisdom is the same. The wisdom God is preached to us from the words of Solomon. King Solomon seems to have taken a reflective view toward things. From the Book of Ecclesiastes Chapter 2, he begins
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teaching that pleasures are meaningless. He goes on to say that he has seen many things, owned many things, purchased and amassed many things. He mentions that nothing has been off limits to him. Whatever he saw and desired, was his for the taking. However, as he looked at all this, the truth of the matter was that it all came to naught. Solomon says that mere pleasure cannot bring satisfaction. The more we get, the more we want, and we are never satisfied. When we come to the realization that all we strive for and work for could very well belong to someone else after we have gone the way all men go, is disheartening. Especially when we know that they did not labor nor toil for any of it. The king says that folly, which is the foolishness of human wisdom is of no value. The wise believer and the foolish unbeliever end up the same, separated from all their amassed pleasures. These things cannot save us, and we cannot take them with us. We will wear ourselves out in despair thinking that those that we deem as underserving will indeed be the recipient of all our treasures. This is a foolish way to live. Let me encourage you with this truth, for as with King Solomon, his wisdom remained with him; a strong understanding, with great human knowledge. But every earthly pleasure, when unconnected with better blessings, leaves the mind as eager and unsatisfied as before. Happiness
16 | Spring 2020
arises not from the situation in which we are placed. It is only through Jesus Christ that final blessedness can be attained. For you this can also be, for Ecclesiastes 12:13 tell us, now all has been heard; here is the conclusion of the matter: Fear God and keep his commandments, for this is the duty of all mankind. Stay encouraged in your relationship with the Father, He alone has what you need. You will not find eternal joy in storing up wealth, nor hoarding things. When all is said and done, someone else will have the opportunity to make yours; theirs, even when they have not worked for it. Be wise, ask for Godly wisdom. Require the wisdom that is from above for it is first pure, then peaceable, gentle, and easy to be intreated, full of mercy and good fruits, without partiality, and without hypocrisy. James 3:17 (KJV). Shalom...
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In The Spotlight
SYLVIA VINES
BY VERNA V. NICKELBERRY I recently caught up with Mrs. Sylvia Vines, an awesome Woman of God and an incredible songstress! Sylvia and I actually attended the same church many years ago so in was indeed a pleasure to sit and catch up as well as reminiscing about our days at Greater Community Temple COGIC located in Memphis, TN, where Bishop Brandon B. Porter is the pastor. We talked for what seems likes hours, before getting down to the business of this amazing interview. 18 | Spring 2020
“God lead me to start label around 2002, rig released my first sing Ending Promise, a trib mothers.”
t a record ght after I gle, Never bute to
OPM: How can you describe who Sylvia Vines is to our audience? SV: I would describe myself as a believer, a worshipper, servant of God, willing to be used in any way He sees fit, a psalmist and minister of God’s Word through song and teaching, and truly just someone who wants God to be pleased with my life. I’m just a nobody trying to tell everybody about somebody who can save anybody! Really! The songs and messages that God has inspired me to write and share are specifically intended to usher in God’s anointing, which destroys yokes, brings hope, healing, peace, restoration, and deliverance, and that draws the unbeliever to Christ. I’m blessed to be the mother of three wonderful young adult children and married to my soulmate, best friend and ministry partner. OPM: How long have you been in ministry? SV: I’ve been active in ministry in various capacities for over 30 years, involved in music ministry, serving as a worship leader, former youth pastor alongside my husband, intercessor, teacher, minister, and prophetic psalmist. I founded Life More Abundantly Ministries in 2000, and through it I sponsor community events, such as annual prayer fellowships, an annual One Night With the King worship event, and bible study and teaching seminars, focusing on spiritual gifts. I also host events so that those who serve in ministry and those who are caregivers and may not be able to attend a Sunday service regularly, have an opportunity to just come and soak in God’s presence and be ministered to. We all need a filling station from time to time; we all need to be ministered to. There are times that we are operating from a place of deficiency and we need to be refilled and refreshed. God gave me that mandate nearly 20 years ago and I have tried to be faithful to that assignment. God always shows up and meets us at every event! I’ve also penned a curriculum, Make a House A Home: Building A Home That Will Last. That curriculum is actually derived from biblical principles that we can use and follow when building the home that will nurture the family that God has given us to steward. Whether that be a home with a single person, married couple, family with children, or multi-generational home. There are spiritual connotations to every physical condition in our lives and in our homes, and searching the scriptures to understand their meaning, their effects, and the tools and discernment that God has given us to build and nurture are key. No matter our varying assignments as individuals, couples ordinarypeoplemagazine | 19
was released on May 9th. It’s been getting radio play and has been well received by gospel music lovers! I wrote that song about 17 years ago, and we recorded it last summer and wrapped it up this spring due to some vocal issues I’ve been battling, as you are aware. I’ve received the same vocal diagnosis twice in a 10-year period, and I’m still recovering and rebuilding my voice. The condition is extremely debilitating, but I thank God that surgery was not required. I’ve been through some therapy and God is truly restoring me. I felt released to move back to studio recording, and just recently, to engage in live ministry events again as well. It’s been quite a journey, but I trust God to heal me completely, and I’m excited to be able to resume working on my first LP, Object of My Praise. OPM: I recall that you mentioned that you release your music under your own record label. Tell me about that and how our audience can support your music ministry and connect with you through social media. SV: God lead me to start a record label around 2002, right after I released my first single, Never Ending Promise, a tribute to mothers. I mused over the intimidating thought of how to do that, and not long after my family relocated to the Chicago area from Memphis in 2004, I served as a guest prophetic psalmist at a prophetic conference. I received a word of confirmation during that conference that I was indeed to start that record label, and the Lord provided some specific instructions. That was all the confirmation I needed. I began to put things in motion and released the first song, Mercies (Lamentations 3:22-24), on my independent label (Morning Java Entertainment), in 2008. All of
20 | Spring 2020
my music is available on all digital outlets, and there are several ways to connect with me. My website is www.sylviavines.com, and my Facebook Artist Page is Sylvia Vines Music. Another way to keep up with new music is to subscribe to my YouTube Channel and connect with me on Twitter (sylvia.vines) and Instagram (sylvia_vines). OPM: You and your husband have been partnering in ministry a long time. What have you learned through that experience? SV: What I’ve learned is that the more you commit yourself to God’s service, the more attacks you should expect from the enemy. And attacks don’t always come from the sources you’d expect, but the one thing we can be sure of, and that is that we have victory through Christ Jesus. So when the enemy comes in on one road, he will flee seven ways! We certainly had to learn to put many things in perspective and support one another through everything that life presents. We found that forgiveness, love and respect are key to resilience in marriage, and we thank God for the grace that has covered us. We’re definitely not perfect people, but we have such a strong bond and great love and affection for one another. It’s really difficult to work cohesively in ministry or even to function when your marriage is hurting, so building a healthy relationship with God in the center is a good place to start, and maintaining that relationship through prayer, communication, fun and fellowship is so important. And I tell anyone that seeking godly counsel to help navigate through difficulties at any stage in marriage, and spending quality time together, are so important. We have
and families, we can discover God’s plan for our lives and our homes. I sometimes reference this curriculum in lessons that I teach, events that I host, and life groups that provide me with a platform to share. It’s been a great blessing because it has evolved as life has evolved. Anytime you invite God’s peace into your home, the enemy is always crouching at the door. So it’s also about constant spiritual warfare. It’s not easy but with God’s help, we grow and we learn how to follow a blueprint that God provides as we build our homes. OPM: Now I know that you are a singer/songwriter. Tell me what you’ve been doing in your music ministry. SV: I’ve been a member of several gospel music groups, including a female gospel group, Total Package, Extraordinaire, under the direction of the late O’Landa Draper, and I’ve served as a praise and worship leader for over 30 years. I was also a featured artist at a summer Christian jazz event, Jazzin’ For Jesus, in the south suburbs of Chicago several years, and I’ve been a lead and background vocalist on several recording projects. I was blessed with the opportunity to travel to Switzerland and serve as a guest soloist with a combined choir out of the Chicago area. I definitely believe that God will allow me to travel and minister overseas again in His timing. That was an amazing experience, and gospel music is truly appreciated in Switzerland. More recently, I’ve been busy working on original music and I’ve released several singles, including Mercies and Petals (Rose of Sharon). Just this past New Year’s Day I released Three Cord Bond (Ecclesiastes 4:12), a song that encourages permanence and reconciliation in marriage. I wrote
that song for my husband for our 25th wedding anniversary last year, and it’s a laid-back melody that leans more to what my husband calls my fusion jazz style! Lol! It’s easily one of our favorites! OPM: Have you been engaged in any other ministry activities outside the US? SV: I had the opportunity to travel to villages in Ghana, West Africa in 2004, and serve in the missions field. This experience changed my life forever. I was blessed to serve alongside 65 or so other missionaries, my husband and our pastors. We hosted a medical clinic and served over 2,300 people in five days! What was so amazing was how much we take for granted in this country. Things we take for granted, such as clean water, food, pain killers, education, edifices and church buildings in which to gather and worship, are not available or easily accessible to poor people living in remote villages. People walked as much as eight hours or more to receive services by our volunteer doctors and staff. Our church is very committed to missions as one of its core values, and that experience personally gave me a newfound passion and desire to pray for people all over the world, and to sow into ministries and organizations that serve people in poor communities around the world. There is great need. OPM: Tell me about your most recent release, your vocal diagnosis, and what you are currently working on. SV: My most recent release is Destiny (Jeremiah 29:11), which
ordinarypeoplemagazine | 21
varying kingdom assignments and three children who are all in college, so we are always busy and trying to find balance in each new season, but we’ve learned to put the brakes on life and seek healing and restoration when we do face difficulties We can avail ourselves to God more easily when we have one another’s love and support. OPM: You’re also an entrepreneur and you and your husband are business owners. Tell me about your current endeavors. SV: Well, my husband and I started Natural Vines in 2019, a company committed to providing consumers with the highest quality natural wellness products. Our website is www. naturalvine.com. My husband was diagnosed with a lifethreatening condition three years ago, and he discovered these products, which he directly credits, along with prayer, as being the key to his condition going into remission. He started sharing the good news with friends and family, and three years later, we are able to share these life-changing natural products derived from plants, with the masses. OPM: I understand that you and your husband are also actively working on awareness initiatives in the black community during the pandemic and in preparation of full re-engagement in society after states have completely opened up. What information have you been sharing and how can our audience tap into the resources you are sharing? SV: As an extension of our ministries and community leadership roles, my husband and I have been engaging in
22 | Spring 2018
pulling together information to help the black community protect itself against COVID-19 through natural supplements. We know that this virus has had a great impact on the black community. Through divine connections, God linked my husband to some progressive physicians both in the US and abroad, who are advocates for using elevated levels of Vitamin D supplements and a few other core supplements to help fortify the body’s defense against coronavirus. This is extremely important for the black community. Their methods have been successful thus far, and anyone interested in being directed to those sources can connect with me through social media and I’d be happy to forward them to information provided by these medical professionals. And we always recommend that members of the black community research Vitamin D and its benefits in fighting coronavirus, speak to their doctors, and get started on a regimen right away under the guidance of their physicians. OPM: Any last words? SV: Look for more new original music this year – and possibly a Christmas EP! We’re currently booking events, so I hope to be in a city near you and certainly hope that you’ll join me. And remember that God loves you and He is concerned about every single detail of your life. Be encouraged and fulfill every Godgiven assignment, for He knows the plans He has for you… plans to prosper you and not to harm you…to give you a hope and a future (Jeremiah 29:11).
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OUR SECOND COUPLE IS LAMONT AND KRISTIE WARD, WE CAUGHT UP WITH THEM AND WANTED TO KNOW JUST A LITTLE BIT MORE ABOUT THIS AWESOME COUPLE. WHAT WE DID NOTICE WAS HOW FABULOUS THEY LOOKED TOGETHER!
H E R FASHION /HI S ST YLE
BY VERNA V. NICKELBERRY
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OPM: What is your fashion “go-to style? Kristie: “Elegance is when the inside is as beautiful as the outside.” – Coco Chanel When it comes to personal style, my mother is my greatest influence. She possessed a regal essence and effortlessly modeled feminine finesse. I was an awkward tomboyish teenager with braces and glasses when she entered me into beauty pageants. As I evolved, I began to embrace the art of simple elegance and gracefully stepped into the essence of my own magnificence. I believe Giorgio Amani captured my sentiments when he stated, “Elegance is not about being noticed, it is about being remembered.” A leading lady understands that her style not only turns heads but is paradigm shifting. We live in a society where modesty is considered antiquated, as numerous women in the media bare all and leave nothing to the imagination. The top five female figures whose style I’ve threaded into my own are: CoCo Chanel, Diana Ross, Jackie Onassis Kennedy, Dorothy Dandridge and Whitney Houston. I believe a woman can be beautiful, bodacious and brilliant. Lamont: have a classic gentleman’s style. This style is simple but yet so expressive. I believe in the old adage, “You never get a second chance to make a first impression”. I just love putting on a suit. To me there is nothing like a man in a welldressed suit that carries himself like a gentleman inside and out. Dressing like a gentleman and conducting yourself as well seems like a lost art form now a days.
OPM: What is that you do in your individual businesses? Kristie: Six years ago I turned a pink slip into Queenfidence Image Consulting. I infuse women with confidence and clarity insights to FIND their voice, FREE their voice and look FAB*YOU*LOUS broadcasting their voice. We focus on four areas of peak performance: mindset mastery, massive momentum, magnetic messaging and potential maximization. The Queenfidence® powerhouse playbook was released this year. It is a 70 day inner guide to transformation, now available on Amazon. Additionally, I am a transformational leadership speaker and emotional resilience trainer for corporate executives. Powerful presence begins with acute selfawareness. It is amazing to witness the beauty of turning my own pain into prudence and prowess.
As the Wards of Wellness we advocate healthy living for married couples. Lamont: I am the proud Owner of a Construction Management, and General Contracting Company. Here we provide all types of Construction services for clients in Commercial, Residential, and Industrial. We do New Construction from the ground up, Shell Buildouts, Renovations, Additions, Home Improvements, Refurbishments, Kitchen Renovations, Bathroom Renovations and more. Additionally, I am a Certified Personal Trainer. For as long as I can remember, I’ve been into fitness in some form or another. When I was young, I did gymnastics and played tennis in College. I have been passionate about fitness and health for a long time. I enjoy training and teaching others about the importance of being fit and healthy, and especially in the black community. My Personal Training Company is called The Iron Way. Our focus is geared towards wellness as a whole and not solely on the exterior physique. OPM: Are you all involved in community service? Kristie: My entire life is community service. I remember hearing Dr. Myles Monroe say, “Serve your gift on a platter.” I have full book of clients and during my free time I provide free advice on numerous media platforms. One mission that is dear to our hearts is elderly care to our neighbors. Recently, I was in tears as I had to say goodbye to my next door neighbor of seventeen years. She has been battling bone cancer and a Hospice van came to pick her up. She was thinking they were taking her to the hospital. After she left, I started reminiscing on all the wonderful memories we shared. There were times when I didn’t have food to eat and she would send me home with three baskets of food. Honestly, her generosity made me want to be a better Christian woman. Lamont: I believe it is our duty to be there for the Elderly because they have made endless sacrifices for the younger generation and especially in our Black Community. I was raised to respect my Elders and it had nothing to do with their color, their gender or whether they were related to me by blood or not. In my neighborhood I take the Elderly to the grocery stores at times when they are unable to find a way. I take their garbage can/cans to the curb on trash pickup days as well return it once they are emptied. I also cut their grass and other small projects they may need done around their home at no charge. OPM: Please share some words of wisdom with our readers ordinarypeoplemagazine | 25
Kristie: In my younger years, I used to attract the wrong type of men. It has been stated that we date on the level of our self-esteem. During a thirteen year hiatus from relationships, I focused on inner healing. I created my first vision book and I wrote sixty bullet points of what I desired in a man. I believe we can live by design and not default. Currently, I have nineteen vision boards and six vision books as I create my inner and outer world. My husband is proof that with God all things are possible when you believe. I had to overcome my fear of being hurt in order to receive the agape love I deserved. Cook for your King. Even with a full schedule my husband has plenty of food to eat. I use the weekends to cook multiple meals to save time during the week. When we first started dating, I could hardly cook anything. I am known to burn a few pots and not in a good way. Love inspires you to become more than you ever thought possible. We often say marry someone who brings out the best in you not the stress in you.
thought, we are putting ourselves in a position where we may have to do damage control. Unfortunately, there are times when we are in our own way in our marriage and we are unaware. This can be extremely challenging as well as detrimental to the marriage. Therefore make sure you remain diligent and are like a watchman on the wall in your marriage. Be deliberate about protecting it from outside danger as well as danger from the inside. It can be tricky at times to identify because our actions are often shrouded by our pride. b) I am a big advocate of self-development. We have to take control of our lives and be intentional about our growth. There is a quote that I hold dear to my heart and it says, “If you are not trying to get better, you are bound to get worse by default”. I have dedicated my life to getting better. With each passing day I am just trying to be a little better than I was the previous day. I am not trying to be perfect but I am just trying to be the best version of myself and I know that this will be a life long journey. I believe you owe your spouse that much. How can anyone in good conscience expect the best from their spouse when they are not giving them their best? The sad thing about this statement is it happens in marriages all the time. You have one party or both in the marriage being selfish, and they wonder why they do not have a healthy and happy marriage.
“Love inspires you to become more than you ever thought possible. We often say marry someone who brings out the best in you not the stress in you.”
Be quick to apologize. We honestly live by Ephesians 4:26, “In your anger do not sin”: Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry.” The goals is to repair any cracks as soon as they appear and protect the bond at all costs. Our favorite book is called Forgive for Love by Dr. Fred Luskin. He asked the pre-marital question, “If your partner never changed anything about themselves would you still spend the rest of your life with them?” There is no perfect partner, even with my clearly written list. Yet, my husband is all that I need and then some. When there is relational conflict, I choose to return to love. Love lavishly and laugh frequently. One of my spiritual mentors told me early on, “Marry your best friend because in the end all you are going to be left with are conversations.” My husband and I laugh every single day. We intentionally show our appreciation for each other on a daily basis in order to never take what we have for granted. Our motto is, “treasure your treasure.” Lamont: a) In order to remain happily married you will have to learn how to put the marriage before your individual feelings. You have to always consider how your feelings and actions will affect the marriage. When we get relaxed and act without
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c) Marriage is like having a full-time job where there are no days off. You have to be okay with this. The minute we decide that today is the day we are going to take a day off from the responsibilities of marriage is like leaving your front door wide open for the world to see all the valuables you have inside and believing no one will enter your home. Marriage means work, work, and more work. The minute we decide that we no longer want to put in the work our marriage is doomed. d) Marriage is about being selfless and not selfish. If you can remember that one thing then you will have a fighting chance in marriage. However, if the latter is shown too often then you may win the battle but lose the war. Meaning, you may get your way at times but at the expense of your marriage taking a beating. e) Communication is going to play a vital role in your marriage.
We have to understand that communication is a dialogue and not a monologue. If you are not comfortable communicating honestly and often with your significant other you will eventually have major problems that may become irreversible. Tell your truth sooner. This may be difficult to do at times but it will save you from a lot of heartache in the future. “Fashion is not something that exists in dresses only. Fashion is in the sky, in the street. Fashion has to do with ideas, the way we live, what is happening.” – Coco Chanel “You live but once; you might as well be amusing.” – Coco Chanel “A girl should be two things: who and what she wants.” – Coco Chanel “I am a woman above everything else.” – Jackie O. Kennedy “Pearls are always appropriate.” – Jackie O. Kennedy “I want to live my life, not record it.”– Jackie O. Kennedy “Instead of looking at the past, I put myself ahead twenty years and try to look at what I need to do now in order to get there then.” – Diana Ross
One of my spiritual mentors told me early on, “Marry your best friend because in the end all you are going to be left with are conversations.” My husband and I laugh every single day. We intentionally show our appreciation for each other on a daily basis in order to never take what we have for granted. Our motto is, “treasure your treasure.”
“You can’t just sit there and wait for people to give you that golden dream. You’ve got to get out there and make it happen for yourself.” – Diana Ross Producers, movie fans, most people see me only as a wild, sexy creature, but I’m not like that at all. It bothers me terribly that I am thought so. It’s a real problem with me – a real handicap.” – Dorothy Dandridge “As an actress, I will attempt to create any role. But I don’t want to be identified with only one kind.” – Dorothy Dandridge
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For Your Health
Uti li z i n g
W IS DOM to Make Health Decisions and Life Choice s.
BY PAOLA TENNON, RN, BSN, MBA/HCA, CCM The reference scripture for this article comes from Ecclesiastes 2:14-15. For the purpose of clarity, I have elected to use the scripture from the New Living Translation and will incorporate the thirteenth verse in the reading. 13. “Wisdom is of more value than foolishness, just as light is better than darkness. 14. For the wise person sees while the fool is blind. Yet I saw that wise and foolish people share the same fate. 15. Both of them die. Just as the fool will die, so will I. So, of what value is all my wisdom? Then I said to myself, this is all so meaningless!” In these scriptures, King Solomon makes a comparison between the wise and the foolish. When Solomon became king, he was told by God to ask for whatever his heart desired and it would be granted. He did not ask for riches, health, longevity, or the destruction of his enemies, rather he asked God for wisdom to rule his people and discernment in administering justice. However, in our reference scriptures Solomon seems to question that choice including the importance and validity of gaining wisdom, since the end result is the same for both the wise and the foolish. Because they meet the same fate, he questions the value of wisdom and concludes that it is
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meaningless. And though this may seem to be hard for some to understand, it increases my curiosity and prompted me to gain more insight of the value associated with wisdom and what impact wisdom has on our lives. Thus, our focus point is centered around wisdom and why being wise has so much emphasis on our lives and especially on our health and safety. As a child I often heard the story of the wise man who built his house upon the rock and the foolish man who built his house upon the sand. When the rains can down the house on the rock stood firm while the house on the sand went BOOM! So, even as a child I wondered what wisdom really was. Since that time, I have come to realize that those who have gained the gift of wisdom have a deeper understanding of the sanctity of God and who we are in comparison to Him. It enables us to take experiences from our own lives and share with others what God has taught us through them. Wisdom helps us to recognize potential outcomes for decisions or actions that could otherwise bring us harm. Wisdom has varying definitions depending on the area of specialty and or the purpose for which it is being defined. However, for the purpose of this article, let us explore what
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the Bible says about it. As we search the scriptures and look closely at its’ content, unlike our reference scriptures, we find that wisdom does indeed have value and meaning. In Proverbs 2:6 (NKJV) we are told where wisdom comes from; “For the Lord gives wisdom; out from His mouth comes knowledge and understanding. Verses 10 and 11 in the same chapter further tells us that; “When wisdom enters your heart, and knowledge is pleasant to your soul, discretion will preserve you: understanding will keep you.” In addition, Proverbs 9:10 explains that; “The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom and knowledge of the Holy One is understanding.” This is significant and will play a role in its’ application to our everyday life. The Book of James, which is considered the New Testament Book of Wisdom, explains that; “If any of you lack wisdom, let him ask of God, who gives to all liberally and without reproach, and it will be given to him.” (James 1:5). Finally, wisdom has greater value than riches and there is also security found in it. “She is more precious than rubies, and all the things you may desire cannot compare with her” (Proverbs 3:15). Now that we know the what, the where and the why of wisdom, let us do as we have been commissioned in Proverbs 4:7 which states “Wisdom is the principle thing; therefore get wisdom. And in all your getting get understanding.” BENEFITS OF WISDOM: We may not realize that there are benefits to being wise. The ‘In Touch Ministry of Rev. Charles Stanley’ list five benefits that wisdom offers which are as follows: 1. Clear guidance from God (Proverbs 3:5-6), 2. God’s divine protection (1 Corinthians 15:33), 3. A good self-image (Proverbs 19:8), 4. Whole person prosperity (Proverbs 10:22) and 5. Good Health and long life. (Proverbs 3:7-8) BARRIERS TO MAKING WISE CHOICES: Barriers to making wise choices can be detrimental to our health and or to our wellbeing. Therefore, it is vital that we self-evaluate to find our areas of weakness and work toward gaining knowledge and a clear understanding thereby enhancing our wisdom. Ultimately, a knowledgeable person should make their own decision after carefully weighing all options. These barriers may include any of the following: • • • • • •
Lack of understanding Emotional problems such as fear or anxiety Incomplete, limited, or inaccurate information All options not being presented Financial difficulties Conflict among medical providers or family regarding which choice to make
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Now that we have a better understanding of wisdom, let us investigate how it is viewed in the academic arena for the purpose of intellectual research and how to best apply it to our health and wellbeing. I began by offering one more scripture which shows us that God is concerned about our welfare. It simply states; “Beloved, I pray that you may prosper in all things and be in health, just as your soul prospers,” (3 John 1:2). People do not typically associate wisdom with health and wellness. However, wisdom requires both knowledge and the understanding of that knowledge in order to make informed decisions. I recently discovered that there is ongoing research being conducted by different disciplines on the topics of wisdom and spirituality and their impact on physical health, mental well-being and social interaction which includes their impact on patient outcomes. An article published in the Harvard Review of Psychiatry May of 2019 suggest that there is emerging research which propose that, “wisdom is linked to better overall health, well-being, happiness, life satisfaction, and resilience.” Furthermore, publications validating the finding of clinical trials are being published. One such publication is entitled, ‘Outcomes of Randomized Clinical Trials of Interventions to Enhance Social, Emotional, and Spiritual Components of Wisdom: A Systematic Review and Meta-analysis’ and is available at https://pubmed.ncbi. nlm.nih.gov/32401284/. Lastly, an article published in JAMA Psychiatry 2020 May 13 conclusions and relevance statement read as follows: “Interventions to enhance spirituality, emotional regulation, and prosocial behaviors are effective in a proportion of people with mental or physical illnesses and from the community. The modern behavioral epidemics of loneliness, suicide, and opioid abuse point to a growing need for wisdomenhancing interventions to promote individual and societal well-being.” In order for us to grasp the true meaning of wisdom especially as it relates to our health and well-being, we must first understand what it is, where it comes from and how to apply it our everyday life. During my research I came across some organizations that will be beneficial in helping to promote better overall outcomes. Some of these resources would be beneficial to employers and their staff or individuals. The Wise Health Decisions (WHD) according to their website is an innovative self-care management wellness program conducted by RNs built around Wise Health Decisions® Worksite Wellness Clinics. Their primary goals are to promote self-care decisions and lifestyle behaviors that improve or maintain health, prevent or delay the occurrence of chronic conditions such as hypertension, diabetes, hypercholesterolemia, and obesity, and enhance control of chronic conditions and prevents or delay complications, in concert with medical management.” In addition, patient advocate consults would be another resource
to be explored. An article published on March 20, 2020 by Trisha Torrey; patient advocacy consultant is entitled: ‘How to Make an Objective Medical Treatment Decision When Making Treatment Decisions Seems Too Difficult. It gives pointers on the process of making wise, informed decisions regarding your health. Their recommendations are listed as follows: 1. Begin by making a list of all your options, which may include surgery, drugs, physical therapies, and even complementary or alternative therapies. 2. Make a list of the pros and cons for each option. Be sure to include how long the treatment will last, recovery time, the financial cost including insurance coverage, short and long-term side effects, potential outcomes and success rates, and the option to refuse treatment. 3. Narrow down your choices and eliminate the options that provide side effects or outcomes you find unacceptable. Then make a tentative decision and share it with you doctor or healthcare provider and family. 4. Once you have made your decision, follow-through. However, if you should have second thoughts or are unsure, consult your medical professional and begin the decision-making process again. 5. If you decide to wait and see how things will work out rather than decide; understand that you may be faced with one of three outcomes. Your body may actually
REFERENCES American Academy of Nursing- retrieved 05/22/2020, https://www. aannet.org/initiatives/edge-runners/profiles/edge-runners--wisehealth-decisions https://journals.lww.com/hrpjournal/Fulltext/2019/05000/The_ Emerging_Empirical_Science_of_Wisdom_.1.aspx?PRID=HRP_ PR_51419 https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/32401284/ https://rojihealthintel.com/2018/10/17/wise-patients-really-can-makemedical-decisions/ , retrieved 05/22/2020 http://verywellhealth.com JAMA Psychiatry. 2020 May 13; e200821. doi: 10.1001/ jamapsychiatry.2020.0821. retrieved 5/20/2020 The Emerging Empirical Science of Wisdom: Definition, Measurement, Neurobiology, Longevity, and Interventions, Jeste, Dilip V. MD; Lee, Ellen E. MD Author Information Harvard Review of Psychiatry: 5/6 2019 - Volume 27 - Issue 3 - p 127-140 doi: 10.1097/HRP.0000000000000205
heal on its own, your problem may worsen, or your condition may lead to death. 6. Seek additional help if you have difficulty making decisions. May we all grow in God’s grace as we open our hearts and minds to becoming wiser in our decision-making process. May we be willing to seek knowledge through information gathering and gaining a better understanding of our disease processes or psychological concerns. And may we increase our ability of discernment through the gift of wisdom. I conclude with Proverbs 1:1-7; “The proverbs of Solomon the son of David, King of Israel: To know wisdom and instruction, to perceive the words of understand, to receive the instruction of wisdom, justice, judgement, and equity; to give prudence to the simple, to the young man knowledge and discretion. A wise man will hear and increase learning, and a man of understanding will attain wise counsel. To understand a proverb and an enigma, the word of the wise and their riddles. The fear of the Lord is the beginning of knowledge, but fools despise wisdom and instruction.”
RESOURCES https://faithlife.com/coronavirus?utm_source=sermons.faithlife. com&utm_medium=advertising_slide-in&utm_content=freecoronavirus-resources-for-churches-families http://sarinapro.weebly.com/uploads/3/8/5/0/38501545/chp_1_ making_healthy_decision.pdf https://www.verywellhealth.com/keys-to-making-informed-healthdecisions-4129589
STYLE CONFIDENCE
BY COURTNEY ROBINSON, WARDROBE STYLIST & IMAGE COACH WITH IMAGE BY COURTNEY
Ordinary Women with Extraordinary Style You don’t have to be a model or a star to dress well. You don’t even need to buy expensive clothes. High end fashion and dressing is all about curating an image. I want to share some tips on how you can uplevel your personal brand and add a bit of luxury to your everyday style - especially for memorable moments that will be photographed.
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• Fine fabrics, simple silhouettes, and a tailored fit are the top 3 ways to help you achieve a polished, camera-friendly look. Let me tell you how...
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•
My number one recommendation for building a high-quality wardrobe is selecting quality garments. So, what distinguishes a high-quality garment from a low-quality garment? Something that is well crafted, holds its shape and will endure multiple wears and washes. High quality fabrics and garments often have striking details, texture, seams and feel good on your skin! Another way to slay your look is with clean lines and simple silhouettes… Does that dress drape and hug you in all the right places and does it move with you effortlessly? Will your trousers retain a sleek profile if
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you’re moving or stationary – seated or standing? Well made clothing follows the shape of your body. Lastly, a tailored fit is essential. Your garments should be neat and flattering to your body shape. Are you petite, tall, broad shoulders, long torso? Address those needs and buy items with a tailored fit or find a great tailor to adjust your clothing.
Sustainable Fashion practices are a great option for getting high-end clothing on a budget! Here are 5 resources for new, preloved or rental clothing: 1. The RealReal 2. ThredUp 3. Poshmark 4. Rent The Runway 5. Facebook Marketplace Helping You Achieve Your Image Goals Knowing your body shape is the key to helping you choose the right fit. Check out this graphic below…what’s your body shape? Apple – Soft, textured fabrics, empire waist garments and tops or dresses with ruching flatter your body. Pear Shape – You look great in scoop-neck and boat-neck tops. Accent them with gorgeous accessories! Inverted Triangle – Peplum tops, A-line dresses and skirts are for you! Rectangle – You wear tube tops and dresses well, pair with a belt to create the hourglass silhouette.
Hourglass – Accentuate your waist and show off your curves! V-necks look great on you! Getting the Most Out of Your Wardrobe Every great outfit starts with a great foundation! Support garments are a worthy investment to look your best. First things first, get a proper bra fitting – to avoid overflow, gaping or bulging. Likewise get shapers that fit comfortably. The right undergarment should not be noticed underneath clothing! Here’s my must have undergarment guide: • White Clothing Wear Nude or Flesh toned undergarments; brown girls can wear black • Form Fitting Clothing Shapewear to smooth your silhouette is a must (no lines); smoothing shorts (Soma Intimates carries an amazing smoothing short!) and an all-in-one body shaper will work for just about any outfit • Strapless, backless, T-back Clothing A convertible bra is also a must; one with straps that are Adjustable and removable For daily tips to help you elevate your personal style during follow me on Instagram @imagebycourtney or Facebook – Image by Courtney.
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MIND YOUR MONEY BY DELAYNA MICHELE ELLIOTT Welcome to “Mind Your Money” your guide to living in Divine Wealth by reprogramming your soul. “Mind Your Money” is my study into the mental technologies of God. It is a journey of financial discovery and discipline. I hope that my journey will ignite an internal fire of joy and fulfillment for you as you also discover the original intentions of God for your financial well-being. Come join me on this wealth journey. There is a joy that can be achieved when there is OneNess in our relationship with money. I think it’s important that we remind ourselves just exactly what money is, how we think about it, how much of it is enough, and how to earn the amount of money we need to live the way we want to live, now as well as in the important future years. I believe everyone has heard at least one version of this scripture:
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1 Timothy 6:10 For the love of money is the root of all kinds of evil. And some people, craving money, have wandered from the true faith and pierced themselves with many sorrows. Money is a tool. Money is the harvest we receive for our production and/or service we provide. Having money allows us to show our love toward each other. Date nights, big screen TVs, Diamonds, food, a lovely home on the beach, travel and freedom from stress. I love the way Earl Nightingale says it. Nothing will take the place of money in the area in which money works. That’s all there is to it. When you need Money, you need Money. My Why: I was always amazed at the strength and power of my mother. As a young girl I would watch and listen as she and her friends would gather in the living room of one of their homes planning something. These young ladies excited, talking loudly, laughing and having a ball. What are they meeting about now? I would ask myself. Mom must have been the leader because she would be the one opening and closing out these highpowered sessions. She was a member of PI Omega PI. She attended Fayetteville State University a HBCU in Fayetteville NC. and earned her Bachelor of Science Degree in Business Education. Yes, she was an adult with 2 girls while attending college to earn her teaching degree. The death of her mother shifted the dynamics
of the family and the dream of her going to college was interrupted. She instead joined the military at 17 and served as a Medical Specialist. She met my father, got married, got pregnant, went to Germany as a dependent wife, was pregnant again with my sister, was betrayed through adultery, left Germany, not by choice, and arrived back in North Carolina, penniless, broken and terrified. My Mom and Aunti were powerful women, caged by society’s limited view of their greatness. The backdrop of their story is the fuel which ignites my passion to help women transform spiritually and financially. I watched my Mom handle her money. She was savvy. She knew how to save and manage her money. I remember her routine. Once a month she pulled down her shoeboxes off the shelf in her closet, sorted by the month. She would sit in the middle of her bed with some malted milk balls and pay her bills. She would later automate this bill paying process when personal computers became available. I had no clue back then that her example would inspire me to seek a career in Financial Services. Diamond Wealth Coach-DeLayna Michele Elliott; WomenwithWealth.com; WorldFidelityLife.com; (704) 421-5701
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Small Business Corner
SM AL L BUS I NE S S
C ORNER
BY VERNA V. NICKELBERRY
36 | Spring 2020
Tips for this quarter is coming from my book “He Wrote the Script…Just Follow It! Applying Biblical Principals for Entrepreneurial Success.”
that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose.” Romans 8:23 (KJV)
Believe it or not, everything that we need is in the work of God (the Bible). I am a firm believer of divine order, meaning that even before we are born, God has already put things in order for our live. He knows us better than anyone. In the book of Jeremiah, chapter one, verse five, God tells Jeremiah, “Before I formed tee in the belly I knew thee,” and the same is for us as well.
As you begin to embark on your entrepreneurial journey, seek God in all of your decisions. Ask for wisdom, for guidance, and for a clear understanding of the vision that He has given, so that you will know, without any doubt, what your purpose is. Your journey is your journey; it is uniquely yours, designed withy you in mind. At times, it will seem hard, but remember that God gave you the vision, and He will be with you every step of the way. He is your counselor, your teacher, and your roadmap to your destiny. For the word of God is life, and it can surely breathe life into your journey! (Insert from the Introduction of “He Wrote the Script…Just Follow I
He knows why we were created and for what purpose we were created. It is us who don’t know, and who waste time trying to figure it out. The good things is we can go to God and ask, “What would you have me to do? What is my life’s purpose here on earth? Show me my purpose. “And we know that all things work together for good of them
Taking a Leap of Faith “Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen.” Hebrews 11:1 (KJV) God has given you a vision of starting your own business. He has positioned you in the right place and surrounded you with the right people and resources. But you are still
“But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you.” Matthew 6:33
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hesitant to take leap of faith. I took my first leap of faith when I became a Tupperware Consultant (at the age of 21), which gave me the confidence to want to work completely for myself. Often, entrepreneurs will start their business while working their “real job,” knowing that it won’t be long before they can move completely into the purpose that God has ordained for them. It is during these time when you must trust God totally and stay on the path that He has set for you. At times, you may want to quit, throw in the towel, or just give up! But, I submit to you to stay on the course because our time is not God’s time. If He has given you the vision, He will make provision! He will be there for you, He will not leave you, nor will he forsake you. Stay the course and stay focused on the task at hand. Use the resources that He has given you, be it networking, coaching calls, or marketing on social media. Don’t be afraid to ask questions or for help. Seek a mentor in your industry. All of these actions will help build your business and a database of contacts. Yes, taking the “leap of faith” can be scary, but if God has given you to go ahead, He knows that you can do it. Whenever you begin to feel like you want to quit, read Philippians 4:13, “I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me.” (KJV) “In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths.” Proverbs 3:6 (KJV) Communication is the Key “Let no corrupt communication proceed out of your mouth, but that which is good to the use of edifying, that it may minister grace unto the hearers.” Ephesians 4:29 Communication is definitely the key to any type of relationship! Being able to communicate well with others also means that you are a good listener. Communication is give and take, meaning that the communicator delivers (gives) the message, and the listener receives (takes) the message. Now, if you are not a good listener, you could miss the message or misinterpret the message altogether. In business relationships, communication is very crucial, for, without it disaster may strike when implementing projects or partnering with other businesses. Great customer
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service, good employee-to-employer relationship, increased organizational morale, and productivity are just a few of the benefits of great communication within business. Here are a few things to consider when communicating with others in business: • • • • • • •
Write down ideas and talking points before attending meetings. Write down questions that you might want to ask. Have a clear understanding of the projects you are presenting. Take notes when attending lectures and networking events. Record the meeting so you can go back and listen to it later. Summarize the meeting/project before closing. Schedule the next meeting within two weeks. (This will ensure that you stay on task.)
“That the communication of thy faith may become effectual by the acknowledging of every good thing which is in you in Christ Jesus.” Philemon 1:6 Again, stay focused, stay prayed up, and stay in the face of God! Verna V. Nickelberry
“Guys…this is Missile Morgan” Seeking to overcome the scars from her abusive, alcoholic father, Jesse Cartwright, Anthony’s best friend from childhood, is determined to make something of her life. Tomboyish in every way, at times her stubbornness puts her in direct conflict with Anthony’s other friends. A born fighter, she ultimately proves to be tougher than every boy in the neighborhood and the only friend Anthony can really count on. As Anthony battles his inner demons in his march toward glory, and Jesse struggles through her own personal tragedies and loss, their paths grow apart. Eventually the two dis- cover their lives are somehow intertwined and neither will truly realize his or her dreams without the other. Surpassing the expectations his father had for him, Anthony Morgan is poised to be the biggest phenomenon baseball has seen in years. Anthony’s future is set. He has worked hard for it, dreamed about it all his life, and can practically taste it! However, what Anthony could not foresee was the untimely death of his father—his mentor and hero. This tragedy started a downward spiral of bad decisions, which ultimately threaten Anthony’s life and future in baseball. Beyond the Lies is as captivating as The Natural, as compelling as Love Comes Softly, and at times as humorous as Diary of a Mad Black Woman. It’s a coming of age story that will appeal to the young and old, the sports enthusiast, the romantic, those gripped by human tragedy, and those who celebrate the triumph of the human spirit. Author Mr. Vanderbilt Brabson, III https://beyondthelies-theboo.com https://www.amazon.cm/Vanderbilt-Brabson-III/e/ B004DWVNW?ref=dbs_p_pbk_r00_abau_000000 See the book Trailer at https://www.vanderbiltbrabsoniii.com
Gospel Music/Artists
WE NDY P E T E R SON & U nit y BY PASTOR TERESA JORDAN Where Did it Begins? Growing up in a small community in North Carolina, Wendy is the oldest of six siblings. Also, she often reminded her twin brother Wayne that she was seven minutes older and he should respect his elders. The love of good music began at the tender age of six years old when she began to sing in the sunshine choir of her local community church that was filled with relatives. It was not a day that went by music could not be heard inside of her childhood home. In the 70’s, Wendy’s father, Preston, was a fan of old school music greats like Sam Cooke, Al Green, Otis Redding and etc. At the same time, traditional gospel music could be heard by her mother and aunts known as
40 | Spring 2020
“Evangelist Mary White and the St. John Gospellettes.” What is the Purpose? The purpose of this ministry is to win souls and lift the burdens of believers in the body of Christ. This group founder and manager is Pastor Bobby Peterson, who is also plays lead Guitar. Since mid-1990’s, Unity has recorded songs of rich traditional gospel music that has the foot stomping, hand clapping, and bass lines. To move forward, the latest project “Together as One” is a long fulfilled dream to have her family join in and sing together. A music mixture of both contemporary and traditional quartet roots to maintain Unity fan base Together
as One will warm the hearts of the people, set the captives free, and bless the fainted.
Be Inspired By Everything I try to make my music representative of myself and my generation. I love Traditional and Quartet music which helped to form the group Unity over twenty years ago. As a young lady in the Quartet music industry many mentors come to mind such as the late Willie Neal Johnson, Doc McKenzie, William Brothers, Mighty Clouds of Joy, Evelyn Turrentine Agee, McDonald Sisters, Edward Sisters, and so many others. I count it a blessing and honor to share the stage with many gospel Quartet legends. Unity has traveled and appeared on NC Gospel Announcers Guild,
GMWA, and other events throughout the east coast. It is with great honor to God for allowing this group another opportunity to minister and spread the good news of Jesus Christ through this song ministry. Let’s Connect Do you have questions, want to book a show, or collaborate on a new piece? Reach out and let’s make magic happen. Co Pastor Wendy Peterson and Unity wendypetersonandunity@gmail.com (910) 850-7351 Bobby Peterson, Manager (910) 797-3423 H L Jessup, Manager
ordinarypeoplemagazine | 41
Miracles and Blessings
YOU CAN MAKE IT: A Te stimony o f Hu rt a nd He a li n g
BY EBONY JACKSON I’m all smiles, stretched out on a gurney, minutes away from getting the surgery I’ve prayed for since 2016. October 10, 2016 to be exact. That was the day that I started dialysis. At the age of 31. The main cause of my kidney failure was due to juvenile diabetes, or Type 1 diabetes. I was 10 years old when I was diagnosed, and for 20 years I’d lived with the illness. Checking blood sugars, insulin shots, counting carbs, exercising; I was on top of my diabetes, and he would say to me if I didn’t continue to maintain control of my diabetes, I would deal with high blood pressure, nerve damage, blindness, amputation, dialysis by 30. I just kind of nodded and smiled. To myself, I was saying that’s never going to happen to me. Never say never. From 10 years old to about 20, everything was fine. I had my mom helping me, making sure that I was doing what I supposed to. Around 20, since I was “grown”, she took a step back. It was now all on me. I did just enough to get by. I was supposed to take my blood sugar four times a day, I took it maybe twice. And they fluctuated like crazy. My Hemoglobin A1c, which measures your average blood glucose level over the past three months, should have been 7% or lower. Mine was at 12%. The higher the A1c, the higher your blood sugars
42 | Spring 2020
were. I was slowly tearing my body up. I was halfway going to doctor’s appointments, eating whatever I wanted, and not exercising: you would think I wasn’t diabetic. Finally, in 2015, something clicked. I was 30 and my body was letting me know it. My eye sight was failing, my feet were swelling and I had high blood pressure. I knew I needed to get to the doctor immediately! I didn’t have health insurance, but was able to go to a clinic that accepted patients with no insurance. That got the ball rolling. I was placed on medicine for high blood pressure, I was extremely anemic and had to have iron infusions and they wanted to follow my kidney function closely. I knew I needed health insurance. I got a job, and after 90 days, my insurance kicked in. I was literally at the doctor the next week. I was placed on more blood pressure medicine and sent to a nephrologist, which is a kidney doctor. I also went to the eye doctor. I left the optometrist picking out frames, because I needed glasses. I was also referred to an ophthalmologist. Apparently, my eyes needed more attention. The ophthalmologist told me that I had diabetic retinopathy, which is damage to the blood vessels at the back of the eye, due to poorly controlled blood sugars, and that the blood vessels were leaking. In order to stop the leaking, I would have to have laser surgery on both eyes. Not the news I was hoping to hear. Before each appointment, I would have to take a Xanax. And while getting the laser treatments, you had two steel bars to grip. That should somewhat explain the level of pain that I experienced. Each eye was done three times, but my doctor wasn’t seeing the results that he needed to see. So next were injections. To God be the glory! Pain less, and they worked. No more blood vessels and no more bleeding behind the eye. I had three treatments on each eye before my eyes were normal again. All I could do was thank God for healing my eyes. And for giving this extraordinary doctor the knowledge to repair my eye sight. Even the pain was worth it. Things were looking up. When I had my appointment with the nephrologist, she started me on a bunch of pills for my kidneys. That was August. By October, I had to be admitted to the hospital to start dialysis. Talk about overwhelming. Because I needed to start immediately, I had to have a Permacath placed in my chest. This was just a temporary IV line that goes into a blood vessel
and it’s accessible for hemodialysis. I had that done on a Monday afternoon and started dialysis that evening. I cried the entire time. I cried for a lot of reasons. I was embarrassed. I was ashamed. I was uncomfortable. I was in pain. I felt helpless. I did not know the amount of damage I’d done to my body all of those years by neglecting to take care of myself. I was on the dialyzer for three and a half hours, and when I was wheeled back into my room, my parents and aunt were there waiting for me. I burst into tears again. I never wanted to go through that again, but I knew this was about to be my life for a while. Both of my grandmothers were on dialysis, one deceased, but I figured if they could do it, surely I could. So I had to make the decision right there, whether to fight or fold. I knew I had God and my family, and that I would be able to go through this. And so it began. I chose to do peritoneal dialysis, which is done at home. A catheter is placed under the abdomen, in your peritoneal cavity
ordinarypeoplemagazine | 43
(God thought of everything), and you hook up to a machine that fills your peritoneum with a cleansing fluid called dialysate and it absorbs waste products, then is drawn back out of your body. It’s usually done while you’re asleep and mine took anywhere from six to eight hours. This was a vital lifestyle change for me. While training, they gave a list of symptoms for dialysis. One was depression. I overlooked it. Maybe not the smartest move on my part. I was going through the motion of it all, sanitizing, taking all my pills, checking blood pressures, getting on the machine, but depression and anxiety had set in. Anxiety more so than depression. There were times when I would go to the hospital, just for anxiety alone. I would become so anxious and physically make myself sick. Anxiety for me was just the fear of what if? So many what ifs ran through my mind. I actually felt like I was losing my mind. I was praying so hard to God every day, most of the day to keep my mind. I could deal with anything physical, but I needed my mind to stay on Him. I wrote scriptures and taped them to my desk. “For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind.” “For I will restore health unto thee and heal thee of thy wounds.” “Looking unto Jesus the author and finisher of our faith; who for the joy that was set before him endured the cross, despising the shame, and is set down at the right hand of the throne of God.” Those were just a few that I had up. I prayed to God fervently for my healing, for my mind, to stay healthy, any and every thing. By this time, I’d started seeing a psychologist and a psychiatrist, who could prescribe me something when the anxiety became too much. Slowly, I felt my life returning to normal. I wasn’t going to let dialysis win. My faith in God was monumental. All my trust was in Him. I knew He would never leave me and keep me. And my support system was incredible. I had people across the nation praying for me. Family, friends, friends of friends, everyone. By this time I was on the list to receive a simultaneous kidney pancreas transplant. I had no clue that was even possible. I wouldn’t have to deal with diabetes or
dialysis again? Sign me up! I was listed at two centers and basically it was a waiting game. December 31, 2018, I was at church. It was a New Year’s Eve service and I got up to testify. I said I truly felt like 2019 was the year I would get my transplant and if God didn’t do it, the fact that He could was enough for me. I was just acknowledging His greatness. In January, I had to have my gallbladder removed. Not a major surgery, but surgery nonetheless. February 8, I got the call. THE CALL! We immediately got on the highway and raced to the hospital. I was so happy. God was answering my prayer. My life was about to change for the better and I owed it all to God. It’s finally about to happen. I get the feel good medicine and I’m out. When I wake up, I have a NG tube in my nose that goes down to my stomach. I’m in ICU. Groggy, of course. With two new organs. Wow! What a mighty God we serve! I’m in ICU because of the pancreas. They have to monitor it to make sure my blood sugars are staying normal. The pancreas works fine. I leave ICU and I’m back on the transplant floor. The kidney isn’t functioning as it should. I’m putting out urine, but my creatinine isn’t going down. Healthy kidneys filter creatinine and other waste products from the blood.
“ A circumstance I thought was the most traumatic event to ever happen to me in my 34 years was the best thing to happen to me.”
44 | Spring 2020
On the second day, an ultra sound is done, and they see a hematoma, which is a collection of blood. Something is wrong. The doctor gives my parents and me the news that the artery to the kidney is twisted and there is no blood flow to it. The doctor used the term “dead kidney”. And he also said it was an error on their part. The kidney immediately has to be removed. So it’s taken out and a permacath is placed in my chest again for dialysis. I was heartbroken. Spirit broken. Hurt. Confused. Sad. This wasn’t supposed to happen. God, why did You allow this to happen to me? I had somewhat of a nervous breakdown the day before I was released from the hospital. It was as if all my emotions decided to come out at once. I became a shell of myself. I was always the one laugh-
ing and making jokes. All of that stopped. I didn’t speak for a while. I was in the hospital every month of 2019. Abscesses, anxiety, vomiting. It was always something. Dialysis three days a week. Life was hitting me hard. But I knew a man from Galilee. Once again, I could fight or fold. I told God if He would give me a kidney, I’d serve Him for the rest of my life. My little sister started testing. Without me even having to ask her. She just stepped up. In August, we found out she was a match. The surgery was expedited and on November 21, 2019, my sister, Tamara, donated her kidney to me. What’s funny is our entire family came to visit us that evening and was going back and forth between the rooms. I literally have the best family. The support, the love, God blessed me immensely. And I don’t take it for granted the significance of having a remarkable family as your support system. Everything we prayed for, God did it. For nine months, I had to go to a clinic, which I despised greatly, but it was almost like a pregnancy. Something was growing inside of me those nine months I did hemodialysis. My relationship with God grew stronger. I was humbled. I felt undeserving of His grace. I became more compassionate. Strength I didn’t know I had, surfaced. My perspective was understood. A circumstance I thought was the most traumatic event to ever happen to me in my 34 years was the best thing to happen to me. It needed to happen. It had to happen. I appreciate the fact that I went through that because my love for God is insurmountable. For the rest of my life, I’ll serve Him. He kept me. He never left me. He comforted me. He calmed me. He gave me favor. He extended his grace. 2 Corinthians 12:9 - “And he said unto me, My grace is sufficient for thee: for my strength is made perfect in weakness. Most gladly therefore will I rather glory in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me.” God did a mighty work for me and He can do the same for anyone going through anything. Never lose faith. Never lose hope. Keep your focus on His promises. God said it, He’s going to do it. You can make it. I encourage everyone to research organ donation and to consider becoming a donor. The website is donatelife.net. I would like to dedicate this article to my grandmother, the late Lottie Lee Jackson; my loving aunt, Patricia Ann Campbell; and my dear friend, Keyla Thomas, who are no longer with us, but always in our heart.
ordinarypeoplemagazine | 45
Consider This
THE MOST IMPORTANT THING BY VANDERBILT BRABSON III, AUTHOR I heard a story not too long ago regarding a man and his pet bird. This man went to a pet store in search of a house pet. While there he decided he wanted to purchase a parakeet. Spotting two of these birds in the store, the man inquired of the store owner, “Do they talk?” The store owner replied, “Yes, of course they talk.” Pointing at one of the two birds, the man asked, “How much for this bird?” The store owner replied, “Well, this one is $100.” The man quickly turned and pointed at the other parakeet and asked, “How about this one—how much?” The store owner answered, “Well, this one is only $25.” Surprised at the store owner’s response, the customer quickly commented, “And you did say they both talk—correct?” “Yes, that’s correct,” replied the store owner; “however, the $100 parakeet not only talks but it sings also, and the $25 parakeet doesn’t sing, but it does talk a little.” The customer smiled, “Well, in that case, I think I will purchase the $25 parakeet …plus a cage to keep it in.”
46 | Spring 2020
The man took his $25 parakeet home and waited day after
The store owner laughed and replied, “Oh yes, well, you
day for the bird to talk, but it didn’t. Finally, after almost
need a little ladder, because the bird has to climb up and
a week, the man went back to the pet shop, walked up to
down that little ladder before pecking the bell if you want
the store owner, and exclaimed, “I’ve had that parakeet
it to talk. The man said, “Well, do you have one of these
for 5 days and it hasn’t uttered one word.”
little ladders in the store?” The store owner said, “I’ve got one for $10.” So, the man bought a little ladder and
The store owner smiled, “Really! Well, tell me, did the
took it home and put it in the cage.”
bird peck the little bell?” The man asked, “What bell? You didn’t mention anything about any bell previously.”
Five days later, the man returned to the store and said
The store owner laughed and said, “Mister, you need a
to the store owner, “Listen I’ve had that parakeet now
little bell, because that parakeet has to peck a little bell
for 13 days, and that bell has been in that cage for at
before it will talk. The man asked, “Well, do you have a
least 8 of those days, and that ladder has been in there
little bell?” “Yes, I’ve got one for $5,” replied the store
for the last 5 days, and still that bird has not uttered one
owner. So, the man bought the little bell, took it home
word.” The store owner scratched the back of his own
and put it in the parakeet’s cage.
head momentarily and looked upward toward the ceiling, as though in deep thought, before asking, “Well, did the
Three days later, the man returned to the store, walked up
parakeet look at itself in the little mirror at the top of the
to the pet store owner and said, “Listen I’ve had that bird
ladder after pecking the bell at the foot of the ladder?”
now for eight days, and that bird hasn’t spoken one word
The man said, “What mirror? You didn’t mention
yet.” The store owner asked, “Ah, well, did it peck the
anything about a mirror before.” The store owner said,
little bell?” The man answered, “Yes, but this parakeet
“Ah yes, well, you need a little mirror so after the
still isn’t talking. The store owner asked, “Did it climb up
parakeet pecks the bell, it can run back up the little ladder,
and down the little ladder before pecking the bell? The
and see itself in the mirror hanging up there. Then it
man asked, “What ladder? You didn’t mention anything
should talk.” The man said, “Well, do you happen to have
about any ladder when I was here last.”
one of those little mirrors?” The store owner said, “I do. I’ve got one for $15.” So, the man purchased the little
ordinarypeoplemagazine | 47
mirror, took it home, and hung it at the top of the little ladder so the bird could see itself.” Five (5) days later, the man returned to the store and said to the store owner, “Listen I’ve had that bird now for 18 days. That bell has been in that cage for at least 13 of those days. That ladder has been in there for at least 10 of those days, and that mirror has been in that cage for the last 5 days, and still that parakeet has not uttered one word.” Rubbing his chin, the store owner asked, “Well, did the parakeet get to swing on the little swing while looking at itself in the mirror? The man asked, “What swing? You didn’t mention anything about any swing previously.” The store owner quickly said, “My apologies.” “Okay…okay, exclaimed the man. “Well, how much is the little swing?” “I’ve got one for $30,” replied the store owner. So, the man bought the little swing and took it home and hung it at the top of the little ladder inside the bird cage to enable the parakeet to swing as it looked at its reflection in the mirror. The following week the man returned to the store, and told the store owner, “Let me tell you about that parakeet.” That little bird pecked the bell and ran up and down that ladder. Then that little bird swung on that little swing while gazing at itself in the mirror. And …. after a minute or two, that little bird began shuttering and shivering, and then its little body stiffened, and within seconds it fell backwards off the swing onto the cage floor below with its feet high in the air. Then that parakeet turned its little head and looked over at me as it lay dying and asked, “Don’t they sell any bird seed at that store you’ve been going to?” Friends, if we are not careful as Christians, we will spend all our time pecking the bells, running up and down ladders, swinging on swings, and looking in mirrors to assure ourselves we are busy little Christians for the Lord. However, to truly be effective as instruments for our Lord’s use, we really need to understand that our activities are no substitute for cultivating spiritual intimacy with our great God and Savior. So how do we do that? We do it by developing the discipline of daily and frequent personal devotions, prayer, reading and meditating on His word—the Bible. It is extremely important that we as believers feed on a continuous diet of the word of God in our lives. Spiritual strength comes through a daily and frequent surrendering of ourselves to Him as living sacrifices for His use
48 | Spring 2020
and His service. As believers it’s not important how fast we run this Christian race. What’s truly important is how effective we run it for our great God and Savior in bringing glory and honor to His name, edifying and exhorting other believers, and taking advantage of opportunities to evangelize the lost souls around us. Perhaps you are not a Christian, and you consider yourself a relatively good person. You work hard and you play hard. Your idea of success is to be able to enjoy your fair share of the world’s enticements in the form of fortune, fame, power, and pleasure. These things in and of themselves are not evil; however, the enemy of our soul cunningly uses such things to ensnare us by subtly turning them into idols that we worship. Even if we get more than our fair share of this world’s fortune, fame, power, and pleasure, such things can never fill the spiritual void in our lives nor the emptiness in our hearts. King Solomon, the wisest man who ever lived, apart from the Godman Jesus Christ, sought and had all the fortune, fame, power, and pleasure his heart desired and ultimately concluded in his writings in the book of Ecclesiastes that seeking contentment
and fulfillment apart from serving and obeying God is vanity
of my flesh. Help me to start immediately scheduling
and vexation of one’s spirit. Nothing in this life, apart from
frequent and daily time with You in prayer and devotion
surrendering ourselves to the Lord Jesus Christ as our Savior
and in the reading of scripture that I may from this day
and Lord, can ever possibly fill that spiritual void and hunger in
forward truly run a spiritually effective race for You. To
our hearts and lives. If you are not a Christian, all you need to
Your honor and glory I ask these things in Jesus name,
do is simply tell God you are sorry for your sin, and recognize
Amen.
that Jesus paid your sin debt at Calvary with His blood, and then surrender your life to Him for the forgiveness of your sin.
“Relying on God has to start all over every day, as if nothing
If you truly mean it, He will save you and forgive you of your
has yet been done.” C.S. Lewis
sin and change you from the inside out. Clive Staples [C.S.] Lewis was a British writer and lay If you are a Christian, and you truly desire to be more
theologian. He held academic positions in English literature at
effective and surrendered to our Heavenly Father for His use,
both Oxford University and Cambridge University.
simply ask Him by sincerely praying: Vanderbilt Brabson III Heavenly Father, please help me to begin right now to
© May 2020
start running a spiritually effective race for You. Help me to frequently spend time with You in prayer and devotion and in the reading of Your word. I ask for Your help in this because if I try doing this on my own, I will fail because I would have made the mistake of attempting it in the energy ordinarypeoplemagazine | 49
OPM Live! with Verna V. Nickelberry Stream live every Saturday at 12:00 p.m. (noon) EST www.facebook.com/omplive1 and YouTube OPM Live! w/Verna V. Nickelberry
www.ordinarypeoplemagazine.com
Inspirational Words
P SALMS 34 (KJV ) I will bless the Lord at all times: his praise shall continually be in my mouth.
What man is he that desireth life, and loveth many days, that he may see good?
My soul shall make her boast in the Lord: the humble shall hear thereof, and be glad.
Keep thy tongue from evil, and thy lips from speaking guile.
O magnify the Lord with me, and let us exalt his name together. I sought the Lord, and he heard me, and delivered me from all my fears. They looked unto him, and were lightened: and their faces were not ashamed. This poor man cried, and the Lord heard him, and saved him out of all his troubles. The angel of the Lord encampeth round about them that fear him, and delivereth them.8 O taste and see that the Lord is good: blessed is the man that trusteth in him. O fear the Lord, ye his saints: for there is no want to them that fear him.
Depart from evil, and do good; seek peace, and pursue it. The eyes of the Lord are upon the righteous, and his ears are open unto their cry. The face of the Lord is against them that do evil, to cut off the remembrance of them from the earth. The righteous cry, and the Lord heareth, and delivereth them out of all their troubles. The Lord is nigh unto them that are of a broken heart; and saveth such as be of a contrite spirit. Many are the afflictions of the righteous: but the Lord delivereth him out of them all. He keepeth all his bones: not one of them is broken.
The young lions do lack, and suffer hunger: but they that seek the Lord shall not want any good thing.
Evil shall slay the wicked: and they that hate the righteous shall be desolate.
Come, ye children, hearken unto me: I will teach you the fear of the Lord.
The Lord redeemeth the soul of his servants: and none of them that trust in him shall be desolate.
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52 | Spring 2020
FROM WITHIN... BY VERNA V. NICKELBERRY The scripture for this issue is Ecclesiastic 2:14-15 as it is about wisdom. I can remember sharing scriptures of wisdom with my boys when they were teenagers, I wanted to make sure that they would be responsible as they were growing into young men. I do hope that you have enjoyed reading “For Your Health – Utilizing Wisdom to Make Health Decisions and Life Choices.” I especially loved how Mrs. Paola Tennon, gave the “Benefits of Wisdom” and the what, the where and the why of wisdom, “let us do as we have been commissioned in Proverbs 4:7 which sates “Wisdom is the principle thing; therefore get wisdom. And in all your getting get understanding.” “Consider This… The Most Important Thing” by Mr. Vanderbilt Brabson, was a very insightful article as well. As he shared with us the story of a man and his bird, which was very interesting to say the least. He also stated that; “As believers it’s not important how fast we run this Christian race. What’s truly important
is how effective we run it for our great God and Savior in bringing glory and honor to His name, edifying and exhorting other believers, and taking advantage of opportunities to evangelize the lost souls around us.” What an honor it is the serve God in bringing lost souls into the Kingdom. Even in this we still must use wisdom. “The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom: and the knowledge of holy is understanding.” Proverbs 9:10 I admonish you today to seek wisdom in all that you do, for wisdom is more valuable than rubies, diamond, and gold! And as always, Love, Peace, and Increase! Verna V. Nickelberry
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