Scene January 2016

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JANUARY 2016 / VOLUME 4 / ISSUE 1

SLOWING everything down

Oh hey Scenesters, Happy 2016!

2015 flew by, eh? We often say that about years’ passing; no matter how many long days or weeks you felt you endured, looking back the year always seems have flown by.

Yet there are so many things to accomplish and never enough time, right? I’m not the type to set resolutions, but in 2016, I’d like to try and stop glorifying ‘busy.’ I want to actually experience my experiences. You know?

Rather than going, going, going and rushing through the motions, skimping on sleep and consuming enough caffeine alone to keep Caribou Coffee in business, I want the time to actually stop and smell the coffee.

I want to have the time to be the writer who doubts their words, because as any writer knows, that’s what makes for great work. The best writers were/are never satisfied and the product is never really final, is it?

Yet for month after month in 2015, I typed out some convoluted thoughts at the last minute and more often not, this column was the only real writing I did.

Maybe I need to be more organized you say?

Practice better time management? You’re right on the money if that’s what you’re thinking.

Outside of my actual office job, my sense of time is lacking. It’s like I break out of the 9-5 cubical grind and all hell breaks loose: ‘I have all the time in the world to do all the things! Take your time!’

My wise, old dad recently said that a minute in my world is more like 30 minutes in the real world.

Those MaxScene Minutes may have a teeny, tiny bit to do with the fact this column is late (I owe you so many beers, Rich), the graduate school presentation I’m giving in three days is mostly non-existent and that on average, I’m anywhere from five to 20 minutes late for social functions-- fashionably late of course, because you know I couldn’t decide what to wear.

While perusing the web site nextavenue.org, I came across the post, “Six ways to slow down time,” by health and wellness blogger and certified strength and conditioning specialist Linda Melone.

It might be site for 55+ , but the following advice can work at any age, because not only do we all need to practice time management, but we need to practice filling our time with meaningful thoughts and experiences.

Below are Melone’s research-backed ways to slooowwwww down and hey, they seem easy enough.

Take a Few Deep Breaths Melone quoted Allison Carmen, the author of The Gift of Maybe when she wrote, “Even one deep breath in the midst of chaos and a busy schedule can provide enough space and time to ask, ‘How do I want to react to this situation?’

Practice a ‘Maybe’ mantra “We forget that life will change again,” Carmen said.

“Keeping the idea of ‘maybe’ close, we can remind ourselves that as bad as things may look or feel, there are always possibilities that maybe what is happening will turn out to be good.

My opine here (because it’s MY column): Thinking about the maybe’s often leads to time consuming thoughts and what-ifs, regardless if they are positive or negative. So, I don’t see myself maybe mantraing about much, do you? (P.S. how about that alliteration!?)

New year’s resolutions from the busiest gal in SoMinn.

6 SoMinn State of Mind Trying to remember.

7 SoMinn SOUND

An assessment of the Tsunami that is Adele’s sudden return to the spotlight.

8 The SoMinn Bucket List,

Winter Edition

A collection of places, events and landmarks that all Southern Minnesotans should experience at least once in their lifetime.

14 Another Fishing Show

The struggle of two long time friends and fishing

buddies to show the world

what the true fishing

experience is.

TRY CUR LING

BOCK FEST

SLEIGH & CUTTER

show

4 MaxSCENE Column

When I was young Scenester, I spent a lot of time at football games, like a lot. It’s the perk (is it?)of a football playing and coaching dad and brother. I have vivid memories in and under the bleachers, on the sideline and of that time when I was five that I followed my dad into the locker room post-game (those boys covered up real quick!)

This past fall I attended a high school football game coached by my brother; I can remember the games I attended in the 90s better than that one. It’s because I was in the moment then, I wasn’t concerned with a to-do list.

And yeah, I was a child. But the long-winded point is that I wasn’t at the football game to work or worry, so I might as well have taken it in.

a Go to

dDing Go Sle

8

18 Amy’s TV Crush

Reflections on that first winter,

Alan Jackson and dear, dear Scott Weiland.

20 The TimeLine

The SoMinn’s most comprehensive calendar of

things to be SCENE.

32 CD Reviews:

• A beloved Twin Cities singer/ songwriter reflects on the loss of his son.

• Everybody does indeed have a mountain.

• With Dan, Israel makes an attempt to keep things together, only to lose out to pure humanity.

• Adele delivers a much anticipated, but overwrought let-down with 25.

34 The Bearded Life Memories Made in The Coldest Winter.

Become Aware “To practice becoming more aware, set an alarm at specific times during the day. When it goes off, stop, look at the clock and take note of what is going on around you and how you feel,” Melone suggests.

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Spend Time Doing Things That Bring You Joy Writing brings me joy. I should be writing so much more. For everyone’s sake. So in 2016 (starting, um, next month…) I’m planning for timely, quality words.

So, what do YOU want to do with your time in 2016?

P.S. www.nextavenue.org/6-ways-to-slow-downtime/

Be Grateful

ABOUT

Publisher & Editor: Rich Larson, 507.645.1104, rlarson@southernminnSCENE.com Calendar listings: 507.333.3130, editor@southernminnSCENE.com

Advertising: Faribault - Mark Nelson, 507.333.3109, mnelson@faribault.com Kenyon - Mark Nelson, 507.333.3148, mnelson@faribault.com Lonsdale - Lori Nickel, 507.744.2551, lnickel@lonsdalenewsreview.com Northfield, South Metro, LeSueur & Waseca Counties - Chad Hjellming, 507.645.1110, chjellming@northfieldnews.com Steele County - Ginny Bergerson, 507.444.2386, gbergerson@owatonna.com

“Instead of going on automatic pilot, stop to focus on the things you appreciate, people you love, experiences in your life,” Melone writes.

Be in the Moment This one is big for me. 2015 found me constantly pondering my next move.

Got a question about sex, love, romance or the meaning of life? MaxSCENE has an answer. Give her a shout at maxSCENE@southernminnscene.com

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SoSSY meCHANiCS PreSeNtS triCK BoXiNg tHUrSDAY, JANUArY 7, 2016

Brian Sostek and Megan McClellan present a brilliant, funny romantic comedy that includes ballroom dance, theater, comedy, puppetry and, as the title implies - boxing. A delightfully original show that’s been performed around the world, Trick Boxing drew praise from What’s On In London – “Through puppetry, dance, humour and charm Sostek and McClellan captivate the audience and deliver punch after punch of theatrical gold. With an almost effervescent positivity that will leave the most jaded audience beaming, Trick Boxing is a show that floats like a butterfly and swings like a bee.” www.sossymechanics.com

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“… a true master of the jazz art form.” – Mpls-St.Paul Magazine. Influenced by John Coltrane, Al Jarreau, Marvin Gaye, and Gil Scott Heron, to name a few, Bruce Henry’s journey has resulted in an eclectic style of world influenced jazz vocals and composition. His pure voice has a rare depth and versatility. Formerly a Minneapolitan, Bruce now makes his home in Chicago, where he regularly performs at top venues and prestigious events. “… he’s not only a singer with outstanding skills, but also a man of great musical imagination.” – St.Paul Pioneer Press.

Daily at

ComiNg SooN:

February 18, 2016 – Dana Cooper, Sally Barris, and the Dovetailers march 10, 2016 – Christian Howes and Southern exposure march 21, 2016 the National Players “Julius Ceasar march 22, 2016, the National Players “ A midsummer Night’s Dream”

Catering Available With Off Premise Alcohol 1802 NW 4th St., Faribault • 507-332-2044 • 507-334-3262 www.faribaultbowling.com A d d y o u r e v e n t f o r F R E E t o t h e T I M E L I N E c a l e n d a r . G O TO w w w. s o u t h ernminn . c o m / s c ene / c a len d a r & C l i c k + A d d a n E v ent

SSM Box Office: 507-333-1620 www.s-sm.org • feslerlampert@s-sm.org All pricing: Adults $15 • Students $9 All Performances at 7:30 pm in Historic Newhall Auditorium.

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RICH LARSON Rich Larson is the publisher and editor of SouthernMinn Scene.

You can reach him at rlarson@southernminnscene.com.

SoMinn STATE

of

MIND

John Lennon wall located in Prague, CZ.

Trying to remember Hi everybody.

I hope you’re all doing well. I hope you’re safe, your families are safe and your loved ones are too. If you’re like me, then you were never happier to be in Southern Minnesota this past month and not in Paris or San Bernardino or even North Minneapolis.

This isn’t the space for making grand statements or for pushing a socio-political agenda, although that has happened a little bit here in the past. This is an arts/entertainment/lifestyle magazine. We’re what you read when you want to escape; when you want find out what fun things are happening in your town. This isn’t supposed to be a place for statements and depressing news.

The thing is, there’s nothing that will make an entertainment journalist feel more irrelevant than pictures of a massacre on TV. There is absolutely nothing that can be done or said to change anything, but there is a need to acknowledge the victims of entirely too much senseless violence and offer our condolences.

What a stupid sentence. Any senseless violence is too much. By and large, it’s safe to say any violence is entirely too much.

I grew up in the Ronald Reagan vs. The Evil Empire 80’s as the son of a man who worked in Naval intelligence. I was always aware of the fact that someone in Moscow could push a button and my family and friends – and me too – would probably be dead twenty minutes later. But it was a vague threat and I never lost sleep over it.

When the Cold War ended and the Soviet Union came apart, I was a political science student at St. Olaf College. I remember thinking that we could be looking at a century of peace. Certainly, there couldn’t be any threat more dangerous than pending nuclear annihilation. I had this overpowering sense of safety and optimism. I was 21 and I was completely naïve.

First there was Desert Storm, and then genocide in the Balkans and Rwanda. Then Oklahoma City. Then we had to worry about Chechnyan rebels getting their hands on nuclear warheads and selling them to Iran. Then there was all that crap in Somalia.

Then there was 9/11.

And then there was war in Afghanistan. Then back to Iraq. Then the bombings of London happened. And we had to worry about Iran making its own nuclear warheads. For cryin’ out loud, some crazy person in Norway went on a rampage.

And every time we turn around that crazy ass family running North Korea is making crazy ass threats. And every time we turn around another suicide bomb is exploding somewhere in the world. And every time we turn around someone dies in this country under – at

6 w w w. s o u t h e r N m I N n SCENE. c o m | J A N U A R Y 2 0 1 6

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best – questionable circumstances.

What has been happening around the world is horrible. What happened in Paris is terrifying because it hits so much closer to home. But don’t we have a false sense of security here in America? We wonder how a massacre like Paris could happen in the Western World, and then are presented with plenty right here at home to keep us on our toes.

I started writing this around November 20.

Since then, Black Lives Matter protestors were shot in North Minneapolis, a gunman killed three people in Colorado Springs and two terrorists killed 14 more in San Bernardino, California. In the span of two weeks, we saw three heinous crimes motivated by hate that made me feel like our society is coming apart at the seams.

What has happened?

In his own unsophisticated and forced way, Rodney King may be the most important philosopher of modern times for simply asking “Can’t we all just get along?”

Yes, I’m bouncing back and forth between international terrorism and domestic racial unrest.

To me they come from the same place, and I believe we’re going to see these things overlapping more and more. That may be a cynical statement, and I hope I’m wrong. I don’t think I am and it comes from a building feeling of dread, not cynicism.

We live in a scary world that forces us to feel and think and say and do scary things. We have to be afraid to send our kids to school, to go to a movie theater, to go to church. We argue about who the “good guys” and the “bad guys,” about what sort of place of worship we want in our neighborhoods and about immigration and refugees and databases. You call me a stupid liberal; I call you a redneck Neanderthal. We’re both wrong. We’re both right. We’re both angry as hell, and we’re up in each other’s faces. Somebody throws a punch. Somebody pulls a gun. Violence begets violence.

My daughters are mostly grown now and both in college. My days of having to come home and explain to them why the world is tearing itself apart are mostly behind me. Quite often, in fact, I find myself wondering if they have insight on

things. But I’m still a dad, and I still agonize over the state of their world. My God, what they will be facing in thirty years?

Folks, I write about music, theater and odd things. I’m no great thinker and I sure as hell don’t know the magic words to bring the dreams of Dr. Martin Luther King – or even Rodney King for that matter - to life. But I do know that we have to teach our children to make this a better world for themselves and their kids than we did for them.

We have to teach them to be smart and vigilant, but to not hate. How’s that for a tightrope?

But we can’t give in to hate. That’s just what the other side wants. There’s a reason it’s called “terrorism.”

Four times in the last month I checked on my kids to make sure they were safe and then I went about my life, each time a little bit worse for the wear.

So, I hope you’re all doing well, and that everybody you love is safe. Thank you for reading SouthernMinn Scene this month. It seems pretty ridiculous to write about concerts and theater when you look at the big picture of this world.

It has felt down right unimportant at times this month. But, dammit, we need concerts and we need theater. We need movies and art galleries.

We need odd things and curiosities. This is not just a hate filled planet where we kill each other over the color of our skin and over whose religion is more important. Not even close! We need to be reminded that this can be a beautiful world, too.

We need to be reminded that human beings are capable of incredibly great things. That we can write beautiful words that move the heart, paint pictures that radiate love, and sing songs that remind us we’re all in this together. That’s what we need to remember. That’s what we have to cling to. We can’t lose sight of that. It’s what we need to tell our kids.

Happy holidays, SoMinn.

May you have a safe, peaceful 2016.

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S.O. Minn SOUND

SARAH OSTERBAUER Sarah Osterbauer is a die-hard music lover. When she does her budget each month, food comes after concert tickets. Find her on twitter @SarahOwrites.

#NowPlaying

Alessia Cara - For anyone else craving a 90’s R&B revival, this is about as close as it gets. Cara, cashing in on unexpected introvert anthem “Here” delivers an album full of smart, sassy, honest R&B. It’s age appropriate for 17 year olds and anyone who remembers being 17.

The

AdeleEffect H ello from the other siiiiiiiiide.

I must have called a thousand tiiiiiiimes. You know the rest.

It’s on every pop station, adult contemporary station, rock station, local station...I’m waiting to hear it on the country station. You cannot escape it. And this is only the beginning. For a woman who made zero effort to promote her new album (aside from simply announcing its very existence), she is breaking hearts and records at breakneck speeds. Her parade of talk show appearances to promote the album following its release are really a victory lap. With over 3 million sold in the first week, (per Nielsen via Billboard) 25 is the biggest selling album of 2015.

The disbelievers, of which there is a somewhat sizeable group, (looking at you Daniel G. Moir) will tell you “Hello” is a generic pop song, crafted with an over-used chord progression, that it cashes in on drug store drama in its arrangement. And those people would be correct in their assessment of the song’s bones. Pop songs are always using popular chord progressions and the best ones are hand crafted to ebb and flow into our mind’s ultimate fairytale. “Hello” is just that. But what makes it so powerful and so addicting is Adele’s interpretation.

Her voice, simply put, is crazy good. Her voice wins the Oscar for bringing the drama to a song. She puts the power and the vocal acrobatics in all the right places. The result is magic. By now I’m sure you’ve seen the genius SNL skit where Adele saves Thanksgiving. The reason that skit is hysterical, is because it’s so close to the truth. If “Hello” comes on (environmental constraints notwithstanding) and everyone in earshot doesn’t start belting it out, then you’ll know who’s missing a soul around you. It begs to be sung. It begs to be felt. It lunges at you with the full force and weight of heavy emotional baggage and begs to be carried. And the rest of the album follows suit.

25 is not a departure from 21. It’s not a major growth musically or lyrically. But it does show a more mature, zen-like Adele. One that accepts love lost, steps away from things not meant for her and even goes so far as to send her love to an ex’s new lover. This is not to say that she’s not still hurt, bruised or broken. The pain never stops but this time it shows itself in the form of nostalgia

versus fresh open wounds. Someone didn’t create a new meme that reads “Adele and cry” (instead of Netflix and chill) for nothing. These songs will jumpstart a river of tears deep enough to hold anyone’s sorrows. You’ll want to swim in that river, dive in that river, make a beaver dam and live in that effing river.

As much as the songs reduce people to tears, Adele’s personality is not sad or melancholy. In fact, her off stage persona only makes people love her more. Between her thick British accent and her no-holds-barred demeanor, she is what my mom calls “a woman’s woman.” She’s what I call a “gives-a-couple-fucks” type of chick. I won’t say no fucks given, because she gives some. She’s unafraid to admit her insecurities and own struggles with life and love. That’s what makes her one of us.

To see her perform live is to be enchanted by her forthcoming nature, and brutal honesty. Some girls like to pretend to be above being mad at exes. Adele is not one of those girls. Listening to her tell the stories behind her songs is like being at a sleepover with this cool funny chick who’s sharing all her secrets with you.

Her social media strategy, or rather complete lack thereof, reinforces her down to earth persona. In a world of manufactured Instagram accounts, Twitter accounts and Tumblrs, Adele is none of that. She’s not posting pics of her “squad” or her “outfit of the day” or hyping anything at all. The music hypes itself. Her personality does the talking. Recently in an interview with an Australian radio station, when asked about her body image, she responded, “I don’t make music for eyes. I make music for ears.” She also expressed that she understands why she gets asked questions about her appearance and it wouldn’t make her as upset if they also asked men those questions. [All women reading this just nodded in solidarity and approval]. This is why she wins. She transcends gender, age, race and class or other things that work to

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separate us. We as humans all have hearts that have loved and been broken, have looked back with regrets, have sacrificed things we wanted for things we needed. Adele gets that about us and translates those experiences into music.

When I first heard 21, it was truly an “Amazing Grace” moment. I was lost and that record found me. It was the first time I knew for certain, this woman wrote this album FOR ME! And that’s how EVERYONE felt. When people hear Adele’s songs, they don’t just hear her, they hear themselves.

They hear words they’ve always wanted to say but couldn’t, and words they were always looking for but could never find. They hear words they didn’t even know they wanted to say in the first place.

Artists like Adele, or Prince or Alicia Keys have this ability to write songs that exist in the beauti-

Glen Hansard - The Once star and former street performer brings everything you love about him on his new album Didn’t He Ramble. He rocks out, he goes Irish minstrel, he goes a little bit country/ Americana and delivers it all through his beautifully bearded voice.

Go See Vaski - Sat Dec 19 Holiday Blowout First Ave Mainroom, SoMinn’s hometown boy wonder returns to set the First Ave mainroom on fire. He’s been returning back to his original style of club bumpers, so bring your dancing shoes for this one.

Kill The Vultures - NYE at the 7th Street Entry with The Cloak Ox, Greg Grease and Cherry Cola. Get down with these guys.

Tickets are $20 which is the cheapest NYE party in downtown Mpls for sure.

ful space between being overly vague and too personal to be relatable. The magic of Adele is how she makes the song come to life in your terms.

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TRY CUR LING

BOCK FEST

SLEIGH & CUTTER

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SoMinn Bucket List

Winter Edition

By RICH LARSON editor@southernminnscene.com

S

ometime last spring, the crack staff of SouthernMinn Scene gathered together in the Plush and Secret Headquarters to determine the definitive SoMinn Bucket List. Playing off the popular movie from a few years ago, the idea was: “What are the things everybody should experience in Southern Minnesota before they kick the bucket?”

We’re an opinionated bunch, and what was meant to be a two-hour meeting turned into a corporate retreat. We had to send out for food a couple times. The editor kept suggesting music stuff, which after a while would cause the rest of the staff to roll their eyes. MaxScene was nearly reduced to tears when her suggestion of Black Friday shopping was roundly rejected.

The big problem we ran into, however, was pairing down all of the good suggestions. For every bad idea, there were three indispensable ideas. The fact is that there is a ton of stuff about Southern Minnesota that makes this place so fantastic. We had a really tough time getting things down to the bear essentials.

Finally, we came to a compromise. Instead of one mammoth list, we would split the list in two – one for the summer and one for the winter. The summertime list, which we published last June, was focused on a lot of things that were only available during the warm weather months. The wintertime list has plenty of entries specific to winter itself, but it was also determined that certain year ‘round, indoor items should be on this particular list as well. I mean, it’s fine to go hang out in the cold to watch a snowmobile race or holiday lights, but in those deep-freeze days in January and February, it just makes more sense to go to a museum

or sit in a theater. This is merely our collective opinion, however. If you want to check out the Minnesota Marine Museum in August, please do not let us stand in your way.

We received plenty of feedback for our summertime list, both good and bad, and we expect the same thing for the winter installment as well. In fact, we’re counting on our readers to tell us what we missed. If we ever decide to revise this list we’ll need your help. Our staff isn’t allowed to have another bucket list meeting.

The upper floor is a rustic looking concert hall, outfitted with second-hand theater seats, couches and at least one rocking chair. They offer beer and wine and popcorn for sale on show nights, but there’s also a self-serve potluck buffet ($3 for a small bowl, $5 for a large bowl). The communal feel even spills over to the ticket prices. The standard ticket goes for $15, but Schwen long ago instituted a pay-what-you-can policy. If you can afford $15, great, please pay that. But if you can’t swing that, he’ll accept as little as $5. Schwen believes in people, and wants to make sure everyone can see and hear the amazing music that happens on his stage.

The rough-hewn feel is the perfect setting for the folk and bluegrass performers that love this place. Every year you’ll see The Pines, Mother Banjo, Erik Koskinen and a seemingly endless stream of Red House Records artists like Andra Suchy, Pieta Brown and Charlie Parr. This is the best music venue in Southern Minnesota. Go see for yourself. www.oakcentergeneralstore.com

been there since 1875, offering the finest service, dining options and comfort available. The St. James Hotel is one of the true historic landmarks in Southern Minnesota. When it opened its doors, it was a wonder of technology offering such lavish amenities as hot and cold running water and gas lighting on every floor. It quickly became known not just for its comfort, but also for the delicious food the hotel served. The railroad adjusted its schedule so travelers could dine at the famous hotel. Rutherford B. Hayes even made a special trip to Red Wing just to eat there.

It may be years past its heyday, but the St. James still holds true to the values upon which it was founded. It’s still an absolutely beautiful building inside and out. The rooms have been kept up over the years, and today visitors can enjoy old Victorian décor while enjoying all the modern amenities we require, including high speed Wi-Fi and, in some rooms, whirlpool tubs. Offering three restaurants, The Port is looked upon as one of the finest in Southern Minnesota, visitors can choose from fine dining to a tap beer and pub food. www.st-james-hotel.com

Go see a show at the Oak Center General Store There is so much opportunity to see great music in Southern Minnesota in the summer that some of our great indoor venues sometimes are undervalued.

That is not the case with the Oak Center General Store.

Offering live music most weekends from October through April, there is nothing else in Southern Minnesota quite like this place. It’s converted Grange Hall built in the early 1900’s sitting on Steven Schwen’s 14 acre farm. The lower floor serves as a market for the produce Schwen grows, as well as other organic, earth friendly products.

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Spend a night at the St. James Hotel in Red Wing

New Ulm Parade of Lights

It’s a stately old red brick building in the center of Downtown Red Wing on Main Street, just a block away from the mighty Mississippi River. It’s

Everybody loves a parade, and in Minnesota we see no reason to deny ourselves one just because it isn’t 750 outside. Just because it’s the begin-

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ning of the holiday season, doesn’t mean we can’t bundle up the local royalty, put them on a few floats and drive them right down Main Street.

Maybe it’s just the Northern European DNA working, but in New Ulm, the Parade of Lights has been going for almost 50 years. Descended from the annual Bavarian Christmas Parade, the Parade is New Ulm’s welcome to the holiday season. Beginning at 6 p.m. every year on the day after Thanksgiving, Minnesota Street is filled with marching bands, dignitaries, clowns and the aforementioned floats festooned with strings of lights. Santa Claus is always the last person in the parade, calling to all that they should follow him over to New Ulm City Hall.

That’s because when the parade is over, the mayor hosts the ceremonial lighting of the city’s Christmas tree, along with the big jolly man himself. Finally everyone is encouraged to walk around downtown, visiting all the charming local shops and restaurants.

We’re not sure if this is how they still do it in Bavaria, but for the capital of Germany in Minnesota, this is a not to be missed tradition. www. exploreminnesota.com/events/1888/parade-oflights

of Christmas lights strung across buildings and hundreds of luminaries lining the street. Storeowners keep their shops open late to offer special sales, some offering hot chocolate and hot apple cider to warm up cold shoppers. Wide-eyed kids can meet Santa Claus or take a ride in his sleigh— which comes complete with reindeer.

It’s a special night that draws hundreds of visitors back every year. Whether it’s for the good deals on Christmas presents, the comradery of wandering the cheerful streets together, or just the enjoyment of taking in the beautiful winter scene—it really is the most wonderful time of the year. www.business.northfieldchamber.com/ events/details/winter-walk-2090

Go see some community theater

Kiwanis Holiday Lights, Sibley Park, Mankato You might think you’re the man when it comes to decorating your house for the holidays. You’ve got lights everywhere, synced with music creating a show that’s suitable for posting on YouTube.

Just don’t get discouraged when you visit the Kiwanis Holiday Lights in Mankato. The Kiwanis Club of Mankato spends nearly a month, recruiting hundreds of volunteers, setting up a holiday light display for the ages: an estimated 1.5 million LED lights and nearly eight miles of extension cords covering the 100 acres of Sibley Park. There are 15 different sections of displays. There’s a light tunnel. There’s a skating rink. Santa Claus sets up shop for pictures three days a week, because this is clearly the closest thing Southern Minnesota has to the North Pole. He even brings a few of his reindeer with him.

Visitors can drive through or walk through.

Most choose to do both, since the experiences are different. Two different radio stations broadcast in conjunction with the display, one as a welcome station and one with music synced to the displays.

The whole thing kicks off with a parade on the day after Thanksgiving.

The Kiwanis club does this as a fundraiser, of course. Visitors are encouraged to bring a nonperishable food item to donate, and maybe drop a few bucks in the donation buckets as well.

So, go on, put up all your lights, and make sure the neighbors know that you are the Father Christmas of Oak Lane. Just don’t think for a second that you’ve got the baddest light show in town. www.kiwanisholidaylights.com

We’re a region made up of small towns, college towns, river towns and one Med City. The one thing Faribault has in common with Austin, Mankato, Lanesboro and Northfield is a great community theater. (Actually Faribault has two.)

In 2015 alone, we’ve been treated to The Little Theatre of Owatonna’s The Producers and The Paradise Community Theatre’s production of Amadeus in Faribault. Mankato’s Merely Players did Guys ‘n’ Dolls, The Merlin Players presented a phenomenal Nine. The Northfield Arts Guild revived the wonderful tradition of Shakespeare in the Park this summer with Macbeth.

And those are just the “amateurs.”

We also have some pretty amazing small professional troupes in SoMinn, beginning with The Commonweal Theatre in Lanesboro, who among other things are known for their annual collaboration with esteemed Twin Cities playwright Jeffrey Hatcher on an adaptation of a Henrik Ibsen play.

Over in New Prague, DalekoArts was formed by two Minneapolis actors who were looking to push the boundaries of the Twin Cities theater scene past the Minnesota River. The Rochester Repertory Theatre and the Rochester Civic Theater continually present smart, well directed productions that can entertain an audience at one point and challenge them the next.

Under no circumstances should one wait for frigid temperatures to head for the theater. All these companies present great works year ‘round.

If you’re a theater lover, SoMinn has you covered.

of the college’s VIP dining room. You’ll be treated to a Scandinavian feast, featuring the great Christmas delicacy that is Lutefisk.

Or you could just go for the music. wp.stolaf.edu/christmasfest

Go see the Trailer Trash and New Standards holiday shows in Rochester Yes, there are plenty, indeed a freakin’ plethora, of talented singers and performers in Southern Minnesota, but during the holidays, the Mayo Civic Center in Rochester has brought in two acts from the Twin Cities to perform the shows for which they have become famous.

The Twin Cities “Honky Tonk Heroes” Trailer Trash, and the jazz combo The New Standards, both made up of veteran local musicians, offer wildly entertaining annual holiday shows that have become tradition for thousands of local music fans. While each show is regularly revamped, the consistency and quality offered by these groups promises that each year is an experience to be anticipated and treasured.

With Trailer Trash, everything is a raucous beer-drinking joke. You might think Grandma Got Run Over By A Reindeer is a funny song and a good laugh during the holiday season. And that’s great. But you’ve probably never heard Reindeer Love, I’ve Shopped Everywhere, or the heartwarming holiday classic, Santa’s A Spy. Who knew you could play the beloved old carol Do You Hear What I Hear set to the tune of the Kinks’ You Really Got Me? While the show might not exactly be designed for the entire family, it’s sure to give mommy and daddy a great holiday break.

The New Standards take a more “sophisticated” approach to their show by putting classic Christmas and pop songs to jazz arrangements, but there is no shortage of fun in this production.

And production is the right word. TNS has been known to create a bombastic staging of songs using choirs, orchestras and any resource they can get their hands on.

If you really want to enjoy some offbeat Christmas music - if you want to laugh so hard your eggnog comes spitting out your nose – then might we suggest you take in a performance by one of these bands in December when they both make their annual trek to Rochester.

For one night every December, Northfield will shut down about six blocks of Division Street (the main drag through town) to automobile traffic as the downtown is transformed into a winter wonderland—covered in sparkling Christmas lights, filled with the sounds of caroling and full of people of all ages enjoying the snow-covered city.

It’s all part of Winter Walk, an annual event held each December to celebrate the winter season and bring the community together.

As the sun sets, the town is lit by thousands

Do New Year’s Eve at Treasure Island Resort & Casino Christmas is an incredible time of year, but, let’s face it – there are a lot of rules at Christmas.

It’s a religious holiday, and therefore, there are certain levels of respect and decorum that must be adhered to. It’s about spending time with family, reflecting on the blessings we have received and sharing the good will we have in our hearts.

New Year’s Eve, thankfully, has none of these restrictions.

New Year’s Eve is about blowing off steam, getting together with 100 of your closest friends and doing things you’ll regret 36 hours later (responsibly, of course). Nowhere in Southern Minnesota will you find a better place to do all of these things than Treasure Island Resort and Casino.

Get a hotel room with your baby, have a great meal at one of the great restaurants, play a little black jack, go see whichever legendary classic rock band the casino has brought in to play for the evening (last year it was Foreigner, this year it’s REO Speedwagon), drink champagne or Miller Lite or single malt scotch, or whatever it is you like to drink, and celebrate for no other reason than for the celebration itself. That’s what Treasure Island is there for. www.ticasino.com

Go sledding behind Old Main at St. Olaf College

St. Olaf Christmas Festival

Northfield Winter Walk

and Back Band, with players like Craig Wasner, Steve Jennings, Mike Hildebrandt and Mark Allen, Rock the Treetop combines tremendous musicianship with re-worked holiday classics, creating the best annual Christmas party in Rice County.

Shows like this are important for a number of reasons. They bring the local community together in a relaxed atmosphere at an important time of the year. They show potential donors why it’s important to support institutions like the Paradise.

Maybe most importantly, though, they’re an outstanding showcase for local talent. The Paradise has this thing figured out. www.paradisecenterforthearts.org

Every kid who ever loved singing in the school holiday concert should look at the St. Olaf Christmas Festival as a goal. It is the gold standard of Christmas chorale celebrations. It’s the Superbowl for choir and orchestra students.

For 103 years, the collected choirs of St. Olaf College, accompanied by the St. Olaf Orchestra, have led what is, in essence, a holiday worship service attended by countless numbers of people, who have been known to come from around the world for the occasion. Christmas Festival is regularly broadcast on Public Television, and has been recognized by The Wall Street Journal and The Los Angeles Times as one of the finest traditional concerts in the country.

And it’s all right here in our back yard.

The St. Olaf Christmas Festival runs for two weekends in early-to-mid December at the Skoglund Athletic Center on the St. Olaf (because that is the only room on campus big enough to accommodate the thing). If you really want to do it up right and get the full Norwegian flavor, try to get a reservation at the Kings Room, which is sort

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Rock the Treetop at the Paradise Center for the Arts in Faribault Radio City Music Hall has its Christmas Spectacular with the Rockettes. The Dorothy Chandler Pavilion in LA brings us Debbie Allen’s Hot Chocolate Nutcracker every year. The Guthrie Theater is famous for its annual production of Charles Dickens’ A Christmas Carol. Lots of theaters like to put together an annual production for the holidays, and the Paradise Center for the Arts is no different. Drawing from the fertile local music scene, the paradise brings us Rock the Treetop every year as sort of an alternative to the candle lit, Scandinavian sweater wearing holiday chorus Christmas carol concert.

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This is most likely one of the lesser-known Great Joys of SoMinn, and frankly I’m pretty sure the people who run my alma mater would prefer it stayed that way for a number of reasons. But it’s just too good to not share. Everyone should slide down this gigantic frozen hill at least once in his or her lifetime.

You can certainly make plenty of jokes about the fact that St. Olaf was built on one of the higher points in Southern Minnesota. The good Lutherans like to be just a little closer to God than everybody else, despite the fact that the January winds running up Manitou Heights can be flat out soul numbing, or if we really want to pay tribute to our Norwegian Heritage, then we have to be absolutely as cold as the Motherland in February.

Whatever the reason for being atop the hill, we can thank physics and gravity for the thrill of coming down. I don’t know exactly how tall the hill is, but it can feel like it’s half-a-mile. The run is blessed with a little plain about a quarter of the way down to give those having second thoughts a chance to bail out at the last minute. By the time you’ve reached the bottom of the hill, you can feel like you’re moving, what? 20, 30, 45, (who knows? 80) miles an hour as your toboggan (or as was the case in my days as a student there, trays stolen from the cafeteria) shoots over the football field sized landing.

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Thrill seekers can have their skydiving, cliff jumping, NASCAR track adventures. I’ll take a $10 red plastic sled, the underside sprayed with PAMdown that monster hill every single time.

runs the snowmobile equivalent to NASCAR, with national events held from Duluth to Upstate New York every year. Canterbury Park is an annual host of one of those events, and if you’re even moderately interested in racing, this is something you have got to check out.

The two-day event will bring in dozens of the best snocross drivers, men and women, pros and amateurs, from all over the world. While the payouts aren’t quite as big as say, the Sprint Cup, there is still plenty of notoriety to be had. The competition is serious and intense and the athleticism is as apparent as the smell of racing fuel.

The 2016 event is set for January 8-9. This is the winter sport for all the motorheads out there.

Some even like it better. Go see for yourself. snocross.com/pirtek-snocross-national/

Hit up the Minnesota Marine Museum in Winona What if I told you there’s an art museum in Southern Minnesota with a collection including pieces by Monet, Renoir, Van Gogh, Andrew Wyeth, Ansel Adams, Pablo Picasso, Georgia O’Keefe, William Bradford, and one of only two of Emanuel Leutze’s surviving portraits of Washington Crossing the Delaware? (This is the one that hung in the White House for fifty-odd years. It’s bigger brother is on display in New York City at the Metropolitan Museum of Art.) Seriously. Not in Milwaukee. Not in Chicago.

Not even in Minneapolis. Right here in SoMinn.

Winona to be specific.

The Minnesota Marine Art Museum has actually been there for nearly a decade, quietly putting together an amazing array of masterpiece works focusing on water-oriented themes. Founded by Mary Burrichter and her husband, Bob Kierlin (the billionaire entrepreneur who began the Fastenal company), MMAM now houses one of the most respected collections of marine art in the world.

The fact that they have kept a somewhat low profile all of this time means that they are there for love of the art and not for any other reason. If it’s one of SoMinn’s better kept secrets that only enhances the visitor’s experience.

Go visit, and heed the warning on their own website: expect to be surprised. www.mmam.org

Rochester Winterfest It’s both a party and a fundraiser. or, more accurately, two weeks’ worth of parties.

Every year during the first half of February the biggest town in Southern Minnesota celebrates the glories of the Minnesota winter with a series of events, both indoor and outdoor, to help raise funds and awareness for worthy causes and have a little fun at the same time.

The festival will begin January 28 and run through Valentines Day, February 14. Events range from cross country skiing at the Quarry Hill Nature Center to art trivia at Rochester Art Center to the annual Snoball softball tournament and something called BaconFest (really the name is all we need – we’re in).

You’ll find live music at BlizzardBash, Boogie Night and the annual Gospel Music Concert. You can make your own snow globe at one event, or race your homemade cardboard sled at another.

There’s a 5K and 10K walk/run, a Blizzard bicycle ride and ice skating. There’s a figure skating competition, sleigh rides, and book sales. Every day you’ll find something different.

Each event is tied to a local non-profit, which will benefit from the donations of participants and spectators. There really is nothing better than having fun and supporting the community at the same time. Rochester Winterfest is as good as it gets. www.rochesterwinterfest.com

ISOC Snocross Racing at Canterbury Park If you watch the X-Games on ESPN you know all about this, if you don’t, boy are you in for a treat.

You know those motorcycle races where the drivers will jump their bikes and do flips and acrobatically pull themselves off and around the seats?

Crazy, right?

Ok, now do that with a snowmobile.

Welcome to the highflying world of ISOC Snocross. The International Series of Champions, which is headquartered in Albertville of all places,

Spend an evening at the Hubbell House Family-gracious service, real china, linen napkins, attention to fresh-made food and an

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authentic 1880’s atmosphere are all trademark aspects of the finest dining experience Southern Minnesota has to offer. The Hubbell House, in tiny little Mantorville (about 30 miles due East of Owatonna) is one of those hidden treasures that locals know about but guard like a family secret, not wanting to spoil it with too much attention.

John Hubbell founded the Hubbell House in 1854, and two years later the original wooden structure was replaced by the current stone building. In it’s early incarnation it was a popular saloon and hotel giving respite to weary mail carriers and hosting such luminaries as Ulysses S. Grant and Horace Greely (both signatures can be found in the original registration book on display in the lobby).

Over the years, the Hubbell House transitioned to a fine dining establishment, receiving critical, if not widespread acclaim. Mantorville is a lovely, wonderful town, but you don’t happen upon it by accident anymore. You have to want to get to Mantorville. And you should. The food is that good.

The Chef cuts all the highest quality aged beef steaks and they use a two-tiered cooking method.

They flavor the meat with their own in-house seasoning; sear it to lock in the juices and then broil to perfection. All of the products they use are high-quality to produce their famous onion rings, garlic toast and Signature Hubbell House dressing – a Thousand Island-like dressing with a freshmade chutney base as opposed to mayonnaise.

Everything is made from scratch from the highest quality ingredients.

Go track this place down. www.hubbellhouserestaurant.com

health. When we tell you that Waseca is the place to be in February, we aren’t kidding. www.sleighandcutterfestival.org

Go Curling in Mapleton The birth of curling is impossible to identify.

Many moons ago on some frozen bog, river or lake in Scotland some Scots probably slid something across the ice to see who could get the closest to the marker. The recorded history of curling goes back to 1541 in Paisley, Scotland. It soon became the most popular game in Scotland; more popular than golf. One Scotsman, Alexander Pennicuik sang, “To Curle on the Ice does greatly please / Being a Manly Scottish Exercise.”

Most likely it made its way to Canada before coming to the U.S., but when it got to Mapleton, Minnesota more than a century ago, people were immediately hooked.

Today the Heather Curling Club in Mapleton is among the most popular in the country and the best place to visit if one wants to learn about the sport. It’s a more refined winter game than hockey, demanding precision and nuance over toughness and speed. It absolutely requires teamwork, however, and a combination of individual skill sets.

Scoff at Curling if you want, but this is an Olympic Sport, and the Heather Curlers have produced more than one Olympian. Funny how such an ancient sport could be considered a great change of pace, but that’s exactly where curling finds itself these days. You should take a look. www.mapletoncurlingclub.org

Go to the Sleigh and Cutter Festival in Waseca The Sleigh and Cutter Festival in Waseca is a unique event, like the town itself. Knowing that winter can start to be a drag right around Groundhog’s Day, Waseca offers an annual festival to combat the dreary late-winter blues.

Yes, every town in America does some sort of annual festival, but most of them fall between June 1 and September 15. And yes, it is true that St. Paul offers the Winter Carnival, there is nothing out there that has the expanse and small town charm of Sleigh and Cutter.

Over the month-and-change that this thing is happening, Waseca will offer thirty sanctioned events and many of Waseca’s local businesses will offer additional “unofficial” events and specials.

Among the offered activities are ice golf, curling, an ice harvest, a 4K Run, an ice plunge, a family snowmobile ride, ice sculpting, euchre, cribbage and bridge tournaments, a peewee hockey tournament and the Miss Waseca County Sleigh and Cutter Pageant. Of course the biggest deal is the parade is the big deal which usually happens right around Valentines Day. Yep. Just when cabin fever starts to set in, the Sleigh and Cutter Festival arrives as the perfect remedy. Do this for your mental and physical

Schell’s Bock Fest With all due respect to every one of the phenomenal local breweries and brewpubs that dot the SoMinn landscape, we all know who rules the roost. After more than a century-and-a-half of making beer in Southern Minnesota, the Schell Family is still the reigning champ.

And why not? They make incredibly good beer.

You have to respect any product that has been created in the same place for more than 150 years.

The good people of New Ulm do more than that every year. They turn the annual release of Schell’s Bock, a seasonal malty ale, into a weekend party, complete with music, dancing, and a treasure hunt to find the Seven Bocks of Winter. (It’s sort of a long story, but a Bock is sort of English/German slang for a billy goat. That’s why you always find a picture of a ram on a bottle of bock beer.)

The beer flows liberally in New Ulm on that

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first Saturday in February. In fact, Bock Fest has been called “A German Mardi Gras,” but leave your beads at home. This is a German thing, not a French thing, and New Ulm is very, very cold in February. www.schellsbrewery.com

Enter the Big Bobber Ice Fishing Tournament in Mankato First, let’s state for the record that this is best done with visiting family or friends from somewhere like Arizona or Florida. You want to see the wonder in a non-Minnesotan’s eyes the first time they see hundreds of people sitting on five gallon buckets in front of a hole cut into a frozen lake. It’s a lot like those YouTube videos of people reacting to the Game of Thrones “Red Wedding.” The look of shock – even horror – and complete lack of understanding will have you laughing for days.

Ice fishing. It is truly something unique to Northern Culture, for obvious reasons. While some prefer the pretense of the whole thing and use it to go sit in a tricked out shack for some peace, quiet and “refreshments,” others take it very, very seriously. The only reason fish are in that lake is to be extracted, and they ain’t gonna catch themselves.

This ice fishing tournament is sponsored by the Minnesota State University Intercollegiate Athletics Department to benefit the Maverick’s scholarship fund. Held annually on Madison Lake, it was canceled in 2015 due to poor ice conditions.

While this winter is not off to what we would call an encouraging start, the 2016 event is scheduled for February 6. Cross your fingers, hope for a deep freeze, and go cut your hole. You won’t believe how much fun it is to sit on a frozen lake. www.msumavericks.com/sports

time mid-February rolls around, I’m a grouchy, complaining, pathetic creature that, as you can imagine, is not so easy to live with. Just ask my wife. She’ll let you know all about it.

So this year, as a concession to her and an attempt to improve my health, both mental and physical, we’re going to look into snowshoeing.

This could just as easily be cross country skiing, but we’ve both been there and done that. Absolutely nothing against skis, mind you, we’re just looking for something new.

It is not a tough thing to do, by the way. There are outfitters everywhere and most state parks offer some sort of guided snowshoe hikes (They almost universally offer cross country ski trails, as well).

It’s great exercise and a terrific way to get outside during the winter to do something that doesn’t involve shoveling your driveway.

You live in Minnesota. Accept winter. Learn to love it. Stop your (my) complaining.

Check out the Winona Winter Carnival At a certain point in the winter, many of us are looking for something to do outside that doesn’t involve putting on thirteen layers of clothing, or wearing form fitting spandex that will show off every unfortunate nook and cranny. Not all of us ski or snowmobile. And I don’t care what you tell me, there is no way my five year old is going to sit still in a fish house staring down a hole, hoping a fish tugs his line. .

Our dear friends in Winona have the answer for us. The Winona Winter Carnival, features more than thirty different activities and presentations for the entire family.

The spectacular Minnesota Marine Art Museum offers guided tours of their collection all weekend.

The Winona Masons sponsor a sock hop. Music sponsored by the Mid West Music Fest is scattered throughout the town. The Frozen River Film Fest will generally offer a preview of their festivities.

There’s not one but two opportunities to jump through a hole and into a frozen lake for charity.

You can run the Cabin Fever Dash and 1 Mile fun run. You’ll also find snowshoeing, cross country skiing and, yes, ice-fishing activities. www.cityofwinona.com

Spend some time at the Rochester Art Center Learn to Snowshoe and Cross Country Ski If you’re going to be a true Minnesotan, you have to embrace the elements and allow yourself to enjoy each season for what it offers.

The first person to take this advice, by the way, should be me.

I’m a notorious hater of winter, and by the

so many vital and creative arts centers throughout the region. From St. Peter to Winona and from Northfield to Lanesboro, they’re everywhere. But not all of them have the resources that the RAC has. This is not to say the Rochester Art Center has deep pockets – indeed they need every donation they can collect – nor is it to say that every other Southern Minnesota art center is not handy and creative when it comes to managing their own budgets. But the RAC has the benefit of some larger spaces and multiple galleries. They are able to feature multiple artists at one time. They can feature an exhibit by contemporary African filmmaker Akosua Adoma Owusu in one gallery and an exhibit by local emerging artist Chad Rutter in another. They can employ full time, experienced curators, and because of their location they can offer a little bit of prestige to their exhibitors.

We need every art center we have in Southern Minnesota. In fact, there’s room for more. The Rochester Art Center simply offers things that others can’t. www.rochesterartcenter.org

Something you should know about the Rochester Art Center before we go a step further: they’re open. Getting to them might not be the easiest thing in the world right now, as they are somewhat surrounded by construction during the Mayo Civic Center expansion project, but they are open.

We promise.

They’re worth finding, by the way.

Southern Minnesota is very fortunate to have

Catch Jivin’ Ivan & The Kings of Swing at the Signature Bar & Grill in Faribault Once a month, you can walk into the Signature Bar & Grill in Faribault and instantly be transported back to a time when ballrooms were full of kids dancing the jitterbug and bands playing songs written by guys named Porter, Miller and Ellington.

Jivin’ Ivan & The Kings of Swing are a throwback to a bygone era, yes, but it’s a sorely missed one. Perhaps the music has gone by the wayside because it takes some real talent to play that stuff well, and not every band can do that music justice. But The Kings of Swing do it very well.

Led by guitarist “Jivin’” Ivan Whillock, the band counts keyboardist Doug Maddow and fiddler extraordinaire Mike Hildebrandt as members. These incredible musicians are matched by the vocal stylings of Dallas Musselman, who could bewitch any soul just by singing the phone book.

The Jivin’ Ivan shows at the Signature have become near legendary events. It’s another case of matching the perfect band with the perfect setting. The next time you’re in need of some of that really old time swing, get over to Faribault and check them out. jivinivanandthekingsofswing.com

Minnesota State University Maverick Hockey There was a day, back before the advent of Big Ten Hockey, when the Minnesota State Mavericks would serve as whipping boys to the big bullies of their conference (ie North Dakota and the University of Minnesota). It felt sometimes like MSU had been prompted to become a Division I hockey program just so the bigger more established schools could beat on them. Some of those games in the early days just didn’t seem fair.

But just as the old WCHA was breaking up, the Mavericks hired Mike Hastings as their head coach.

In the three seasons since then, the team has a record of 79-36-7. You think that’s due to lesser competition? Well, last season, the Mavericks spent weeks ranked #1 in the country, advancing to the Western Conference semi finals.

No longer punching bags for other schools, the MSU Maverick Men’s Hockey Team is one of the premier programs in the country. Hockey is a way of life in Minnesota and even the average Minnesotan can discern between bad hockey, good hockey and great hockey. The Mavericks are on the cusp of becoming great. This is when you want to start paying attention to them. www.msumavericks.com/index. aspx?path=mhockey

Attend the Frozen River Film Festival in Winona As a proud Northfielder, it’s difficult for me to admit this, but I think Winona might be the coolest place in all of SoMinn. As an arts community, that is one town that really has its act together.

Among the reasons I say that is the Frozen River Film Festival. The festival offers more than fifty films shown in various locations throughout the town. Ranging from shorts and youth-oriented films to full feature length films, the Frozen River Film Festival is a tremendous stage for documentaries and socially minded filmmakers.

It’s impossible to see all 50 movies in one festival, so the organizers very politely group the films into categories. There’s the Adrenaline Set, which features a group of films about extreme sports like rock climbing, skateboarding and surfing. The Kids’ Film Set is made up of a dozen short films

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From 11 produced for young people.

Ten years in, the Frozen River Film Fest has become a great attraction to both filmmakers and film lovers. If you fall into one of those categories, you might want to scoot down Highway 61 February 24-28 and check it out. frff.org

too. Go check it out. (And get off that snowboard and try some skis for once!) www.nastar.com

Attend the annual Ibsen Festival in Lanesboro, presented by the Commonweal Theatre

See the New Ulm St. Patrick’s Day Parade

The Midwest NASTAR Championships If you grew up in Minnesota in the 1970’s and 80’s, one of the things you did as a matter of course was go downhill skiing. This was before the advent of the Snowboard, so we weren’t as cool as the kids are these days. Hell, I talk about skiing now and feel a little pre-historic.

But I’m glad to know that some things haven’t changed as much as I’d thought. Back in the day when you’d pay your $10 for a lift ticket at Buck Hill (by the way, the amount of lift tickets you had on the zipper of your ski jacket was a status symbol at Valley View Junior High), you could pay an extra $5 and run the NASTAR race, which was a timed slalom course. It was great. It gave you free reign to get down the hill as fast as possible without worrying about someone getting in your way.

It turns out that NASTAR is still a thing, as is downhill skiing for that matter, and they even have National Championships. In order to qualify for Nationals, you obviously have to win your regional. The Midwest regionals for 2016 just happen to be at Southern Minnesota’s premier ski resort, Welch Village.

Okay, we’re cheating by sneaking this one onto the list. This isn’t an annual SoMinn event, but it is something that’s worth watching wherever it’s held. This is amateur skiing heaven. There will be favorites, but someone is bound to surprise you,

Soar with the Eagles at the National Eagle Center in Wabasha How cool is it that Bald Eagles have made such a great recovery. I don’t remember seeing a single one south of the Boundary Waters when I was a kid, but just in the last ten years or so, they’ve been slowly making their way back to SoMinn.

Two of them chose to circle around my daughter’s high school graduation a few years ago. In fact I just saw one in my neighborhood last month, causing some of my younger, and probably inebriated neighbors to spontaneously break into the Star Spangled banner.

True story.

The National Eagle Center in Wabasha is another of those really well kept SoMinn secrets needs to be uncovered in a hurry. Their gorgeous 15,000 square foot interpretive center sits right on the banks of the Mississippi River. From this facility visitors can enjoy magnificent views of wild eagles and meet the five resident Eagles (four Bald and one Golden).

Every weekend March as the spring migration back to the Upper Mississippi River Valley commences, the NEC offers their Soar With the Eagles programs. It’s a rare opportunity to see and learn about these magnificent birds in their natural habitat. We don’t think there is a better family oriented event in SoMinn than this one. Go check it out. www.nationaleaglecenter.org

With 65.85% of its population claiming German ancestry, New Ulm is considered the most ethnically pure city in the U.S. But that leaves a solid 34% of non-German residents, many of whom claim Irish ancestory. So, what is a lonely Irishman or Irishwoman to do in The German capital of Minnesota on St. Patrick’s Day. Hold a parade, of course.

It may be one of the quirkier facts about Southern Minnesota, but our longest running St. Patrick’s Day Parade is held every year in New Ulm. The event was first organized in 1966, and over the years, the event has grown. In 2015, the parade was long enough to wind around a two full blocks. People still wear green and carry signs, often bringing along dogs dressed in green as well.

The parade also includes green vehicles, either borrowed from individuals or local car dealerships.

In addition to the marchers, the parade features a St. Patrick’s Day Queen, and the New Ulm Battery, whose members wear kilts, carry bagpipes and pull cannons. And bridging the gap between Germans and Irish, the New Ulm Concord Singers wear green, sing Irish songs and change their name to the O’Concord Singers for the day. St. Patrick himself makes an appearance as well, along with Grace O’Malley, the famous Irish pirate queen.

Anyone is welcome to participate in the parade, regardless of nationality or heritage. Even if you’re German. newulmblarney.com

Aside from being both the Bed & Breakfast Capital and The Rhubarb Capital of Minnesota and The Smithsonian declaring them one of the 20 Best American Small Towns to Visit in the United States, Lanesboro’s biggest claim to fame is the Commonweal Theatre Company.

The Commonweal is rightly respected as one of the finest regional troupes in the country. But you know this. We actually talked about this in the Summertime Bucket list (see: Do the Lanesboro Thing). However as one final note for the Wintertime list, and not a moment too soon, as this particular event happens in early April.

Seriously, among the Commonweal’s many great attributes is their understanding of community. Having placed themselves deep in the heart of Norwegian America, they teamed with award-winning Minnesota playwright Jeffery Hatcher to adapt and present one of Henrik Ibsen’s works every year. Known as “the father of modern drama,” Ibsen is an icon and a hero from a country and culture not well known for expressing regard and respect, but he is so important to the Norwegian people that part of the funding for the Ibsen Festival comes through a grant from the Norwegian government.

In 2016, the Commonweal will present The League of Youth, a rare Ibsen comedy. This being an election year, they decided to present Ibsen’s one stab at political satire. It might be the only time you’re allowed to laugh out loud during an Ibsen play, so you’d best take advantage of the opportunity. www.commonwealtheatre.org Rich Larson is the publisher and editor of SouthernMinn Scene. You can reach him at rlarson@southernminnscene.com.

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By Autumn Van Ravenhorst editor@southernminnscene.com

T

here is an undoubted authenticity that comes with two boys wearing ‘80s short-shorts and carrying tackle boxes. Nearly everything seen through a TV screen lacks full reality and sincerity but these two lifelong friends, Pete & Greg, have taken on one of the kings of bogus television.

Fishing isn’t pretty—no true fisherman sets out looking like he just won the Daytona 500. The day isn’t spent with militarygrade electronics and you certainly don’t head back to a resort clean as a whistle. You are filthy; you are gross. The smell lingers, folks.

With a boat from 1987, recurrent setbacks from Mother Nature and a drone for aerial shooting, what are Pete and Greg’s ultimate goal?

To keep the soul.

“We want the show to be relatable,” said Greg Underdahl.

Greg is a freelance videographer, editor and producer. He graduated with a broadcasting degree and took his first job at the

Bass Pro Shops headquarters in Springfield, Missouri. He then moved on to Tulsa, Oklahoma where he was a producer at a production company. He has done work for ESPN Outdoors and hosted a show about trucks called “Roll With It.” He is now back in Minnesota, teaming up with his enduring compadre, Pete Wagner.

Pete graduated from MSU with a BA in geography but then decided to do some traveling of his own to play music. After living the broke life of a musician and missing small town life, he went into the family business, now owning a grocery store in both Kenyon and New Richland. But as most musicians know, the fire never dies. Even after choosing to deviate from that path, Pete still plays shows from time to time.

The two grew up together in Adams, Minnesota with an appetite for catching critters and hanging out at the oasis that was Pete’s home, complete with aquariums and A/C. (Greg and I reflected on the life of having no air conditioning; Pete was one lucky bastard.) The two were born outdoorsmen with a craving to turn their passion into a living, operating their own zoo in grade school. For just 25 cents, you could become a spectator of what would eventually be their walk of life.

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There is a stark difference between what fishing shows are and what they should be. The action-packed adventures, expensive gear and bragging about the bestcaught fish actually destroy the whole concept of the sport. Well, a sport for some, a simple pastime for others. There are three elements to a great day of fishing: long periods of boredom with brief intervals of excitement, habitual unsuccessful days, and beer.

Greg and Pete’s

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Pete & Greg

project “isn’t another fishing show, it’s ‘Another Fishing Show.’”

“We despise fishing shows,” said Pete.

“We grew up loving them but now we hate them. We don’t want to teach people how to fish and we don’t want to promote anything. We want to show the cultural experience, that this is what [fishing] really is.”

Greg continued, “To me, it is all about storytelling. If you tell a great story, which a lot of shows don’t do at all, it will appeal to everyone. Not just those who love to fish.

The majority of our stories are two guys who drink beer, fish all day, catch nothing and go home.”

That’s the gist—as it should be. But in the midst of an average southern Minnesota day of fishing are jokes, families and a series of unfortunate events.

“Our second episode is of us breaking down. The whole day is us getting towed but then we finish the night off with a great, heroic fishing moment. That’s a great story,” said Greg.

Most of us go through life, experiencing some of the craziest or comical shit and think to ourselves, “Why aren’t we filming this.” Regrettably, a lot of people do. YouTube is like the Fukishima radiation spill: it just keeps dumping garbage onto the web.

But, when you have a friend whose camera equipment out-prices your fishing tackle, you get a perfectly polished, professional piece of art.

Their first shoot was in the fall of 2011 and they ended up with about three years of footage, filming just about anything that comes with a day of fishing.

“We had the idea of what we wanted to do and what we wanted to see in a show.

The biggest thing was we wanted people to see the background. It isn’t just about being on the water. It’s about having a drink, deciding where to go and everything else that happens off the water. So much happens before you get on the water and when you finally get off and we want to capture that,” said I have no idea. Those two go back and forth like a toddler who can’t decide if he needs to go to the bathroom. Which, makes for a great interview and in the end, a great show.

We compared the show to Seinfeld. The shows are kind of about nothing, but everyone can relate. Everyone knows a Kramer, and in southern Minnesota, everyone knows a Pete or Greg.

Though the reasons for their adoration of angling from the land of 10,000 lakes may differ slightly, it comes down to the unknown.

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“You don’t know what the day will bring. We consider ourselves biologists,” said Greg.

Pete followed up with, “It is just the natural evolution of my personality.

Hunting? That’s too much.

And fish isn’t a food source for me. I just want to catch something and be like ‘Bye, have a nice day.’”

Either way, whether it is a reflection of who you are as a person or to embark on an adventure, it’s all about discovering fish and the people.

One of their most recent encounters was in the scenic city of Red Wing where, according to Greg, you have the only open water fishing in the winter. Whatever the hell is discharging from a nuclear power plant prevents the water from freezing over.

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te & Greg

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Greg

Greg

Pete

Pete Wagner performing with his band.

From 15 And fortuitously, the area is full of fish. There’s a bait shop. There’s a resort. I don’t know if people eat the fish. I don’t want to know. But, it is a prime spot for a lot of people.

And this winter, the two will be heading up to Gull Lake in Brainerd for the biggest ice-fishing contest in the world—the Jaycee $150,000 Ice-Fishing Extravaganza.

With jobs and obligations that come with the humdrum of life, episodes aren’t churning out as fast as they would like. They are aiming to put out an episode every month come 2016, their first episode of the year being the warm water discharge in Red Wing.

“With just the two of us interviewing, filming, editing content, in reality we aren’t able to put quality episodes out that quick. But we have a great formula, great idea and people are responding really well.

We are just doing it. And that is all that matters,” said Greg.

That doesn’t mean you are left high and dry. The two are active on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, YouTube, Vimeo and their own website.

Their show represents the common man. It is hilarious. It isn’t manipulated and stays true to what it was created to be.

I put them to test with this question: Would you sell your soul?

The answer? “No.” With, of course, a couple

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stipulations that I was able to pry out of them.

“We obviously want to make a living by doing this. But we don’t want to compromise the idea,” said Pete. “That wouldn’t make it our show anymore. I have my grandpa’s boat, the one you will see in the show, that he used to take both of us fishing in. My boat takes 10 hard pulls before it starts smoking like crazy. We want

an alternative show. You don’t need a great 23-foot boat with $4,000 worth of electronic to find a fish or to enjoy fishing.”

“Fishing isn’t about ego,” continued Greg.

“We are fine with getting our asses handed to us. It is a badge of honor. It happens to the

greatest of fisherman on TV, more than they will show. We are proud of our low-tech gear. It is part of our trademark.”

I asked one final question, “Would you sell your soul if money or promotions were involved?”

“No one has put our feet to the fire yet, but no, we would never sport equipment that we do not vouch for. That has become way too prevalent—it is lying. How is that not lying? If someone asked me to wear a Shimano shirt, I would.

Not the poles, but the reels. We won’t lie. And that is who we want to look at as supporters. That might make it tough for us, but we cannot compromise the idea of the show,” said Greg.

And if they fail?

“Worst case scenario, we will have a record of our exploits that we can show our kids,” said Pete.

Fishing is a great excuse to escape—or to just not do much of anything at all. It can bring back memories; enjoying a sunset on the lake or of eating a stale ham sandwich and getting your line stuck in every crap hole. Their show is a true representation of fishing.

Even if money isn’t in the shows future, the great Tony Bennett once said, “If you follow your passions, you’ll never work a day in your life.”

Autumn Van Ravenhorst is a staff writer for SouthernMinn Scene.

Drop her a line at autumn.vanravenhorst@gmail.com.

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| JANUARY 2016

17

How the hell did I get here?

AMY’S TV CRUSH

AMY MERRITT Amy Merritt is a well respected TV critic who...um... I’m sorry.

I’m having a lot of trouble processing the image of Amy Merritt at an Alan Jackson concert. Contact her at amystvcrush@gmail.com

S

ometimes, in the non-winter months, I forget that I am a Midwest transplant. I moved from Phoenix, AZ to a little town in rural South Dakota my freshman year of high school. It’s beyond obvious to say that the culture shock was debilitating. For example, why do people in old pickup trucks give that two-finger wave when they pass you on a rural road? (“Mom, do you know that guy?”) Come to think of it, why isn’t this road paved? Why do the kids in my high school listen to modern country incessantly and wear sweatpants to school? And what is with that accent? Little did I know it was about to get much, much worse.

My first Midwestern winter was not something I embraced. I had no idea temperatures could be in the single digits or what the words “wind chill” meant. I had never owned boots or gloves, and I truly had no idea a person’s damp hair could freeze in seconds. I thought ice skating was something you did in the mall during middle school birthday parties.

Of course, I also hadn’t made any friends.

Apparently in small towns all these people have lived next door to each other since kindergarten. Plus, my tendency toward shyness became kind of an undiagnosed clinical condition. And people thought I dressed funny. (Looking back, my “outfits” were extremely color-coordinated and accessorized).

I was also apparently really immature.

I guess

in rural SD people my age were learning to drink beer and do, Scott Weiland ahem, other things with each other while I was in Phoenix riding my bike around the block (that’s as far as I was permitted to go). I don’t think I spoke to anyone outside of my family that first year. On top of feeling and looking like a weirdo, the first time my high school declared a snow day I was terrified. It had never really occurred to me that the weather could control and radically disrupt daily

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life.

Now I know better. And of course, things got better. I acclimated or, more accurately, gave in. I eventually had a small but great group of girlfriends in high school. We made our own fun. I somewhat accidently learned the lyrics to Garth Brooks songs, which would be blasted on the stereo of my friend’s GMC Jimmy while we “cruised” the 5 blocks of Main Street. Once, my friend even dragged me to an Alan Jackson concert.

Of course, when the woman behind me stood up on her chair and yelled, “Alan, I want to have your baby!!”

I thought, “how the hell did I get here?!”

I believe it was in high Alan Jackson school that my love for television really solidified itself. I wasn’t into drinking beer or doing those “other things” (not that I was invited). I spent many nights at home, back when we had 3 or 4 over-the-air channels and an infuriatingly fickle set of rabbit ears, watching whatever would come on. That first winter in the Midwest, I found solace in the fact that even here in this uncivilized tundra, The Sound of Music was aired with limited commercial interruption, thank God. I’ve now endured 25 Midwest winters, and I’ve figured out a few things. The Sound of

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Music never gets old (although it is not a sin to fast forward through “Climb Every Mountain”).

A good pair of snug earmuffs can change a person’s whole outlook on life. And I have come to realize that while high school sucked, it might have sucked a lot worse for a shy, immature girl in a huge urban high school. And while Alan Jackson sucks, those proclivities soon gave way to Nirvana, Nine Inch Nails, Pearl Jam and Stone Temple Pilots.

One of my best memories from high school, and really from life so far, was when my girlfriends and I traveled all the way to Omaha (!) by ourselves (!) to see STP in concert. During the first opener, we efficiently flirted our way into “the pit” on the floor in front of the stage (despite our relative fragility and cheap tickets).

And when, in a darkened and electric arena, a spotlight suddenly shone on Scott Weiland rocking alone in the middle of the stage in a plush recliner, singing “Plush” no less, I am embarrassed to say that it was one of the greatest moments of my teenage life. Hours later, sweaty and bruised and euphoric, I thought happily “how the hell did I get here?!” There aren’t many moments like that. This year, I didn’t buy tickets to see Scott Weiland again. I regret saying that I was simply too afraid to go. And on Thursday, December 3rd while I was literally buying a salad spinner and a pillow at IKEA, Stone Temple Pilots front man Scott Weiland died in a tour bus a few blocks away. I will miss him. And I am grateful for all of the circumstances, good or bad, that put me in that arena that night in the early 90’s.

I still haven’t bought a giant puffy winter jacket, that symbol of oppression and defeat.

But when driving on rural roads, I lift two fingers off the wheel when passing an old pickup. I can’t help myself. I am one of you. This winter, instead of being afraid, I might try something new. Like ice-skating OUT-OF-DOORS. In the meantime, I will spend most of the next couple of months binge-watching teen dramas like Buffy and The O.C., both set in sunny CA. But let’s not overanalyze it.

A d d y o u r e v e n t f o r F R E E t o t h e T I M E L I N E c a l e n d a r . G O TO w w w. s o u t h ernminn . c o m / s c ene / c a len d a r & C l i c k + A d d a n E v ent

Your future starts with an

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THE

Rochesterwinterfest.com – Andy Ott, fifth grader, won the 2016 WinterFest logo contest.

WinterFest XIV Jan. 28 – Feb. 14 Rochester

– – Autumn Van Ravenhorst, editor@southernminnscene.com

Facebook.com/maryjanealmmusic. – Photo courtesy of Jessica Hegland.

Mary Jane Alm

7:30 p.m., Friday, Jan. 8

Paradise Center for the Arts, Faribault The word legend has been tossed around so much that it hass been cheapened.

Therefore we have to find other words to describe Mary Jane Alm. Fabled? Historic? Mythic?

Nothing can quite do her justice. Critics have tried to peg her into a specific genre – usually country – but no label has ever stuck there, either. Mercurial, maybe? A good start, but it doesn’t have the positive connotations we need. Put simply, Mary Jane Alm has been a fixture of the Minnesota music scene for over thirty years, as the leader of the celebrated bar band that bears her name, as the vocalist for the famous house band at the old Rupert’s Night Club in Golden Valley, as a member of Women Who Cook, and with countless other projects. Alm released her first album in over 20 years in 2013, and we’re happy to report that her voice is unblemished by time.

Anyone who used to go see the Mary Jane Alm Band play at Nibs in the early 80’s won’t be disappointed with this show.

– – Rich Larson, editor@southernminnscene.com

12th Annual Textile and Jewelry Show / Crossings / Zumbrota / Through 12.31

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January 18-26: Full Belly Soup Kitchen: 18-Dec, 9:00 AM, Cathedral Guild House, 515 2nd Ave, Faribault, Donations welcome.. Full meal served.

Teen Night: 18-Dec, 10:00 AM, J&J Bowling Center, 1802 4th St.

MR. JST TECHNOLOGY CONSULTING

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You don’t have to immerse yourself into frigid waters to partake in winter activities or benefit a worthy cause. I do plenty of dipping and diving in the winter. I like to call it taking the “Sweatpants Plunge,” with proceeds going to my couch. For real, though— giving is great. Businesses and organizations even go so far as to make the gratifying experience more entertaining. Because, let’s be honest, it can really take determination for some people to maneuver around their egoistic ways.

In its 14th year, WinterFest promotes all-age wintertime activities while raising both awareness and funds for events sponsored by area nonprofits.

Last year, they raised over $350,000 for nonprofit organizations in the community. For more than two weeks, Rochester will be filled with happenings, each benefiting a specific group or initiative. Among those activities are BaconFest, ARTrivia, Valentines Candlelit Ski, Skate the Oval, Snoball Softball and of course, multiple plunges for the valiant supporters.

The behemoth of a scarf Lenny Kravitz chose to wear might actually serve a purpose for these folks emerging from the ice-cold slush.

Children can take a sleigh ride at the History Center, make their own snow globe, compete in the Cardboard Sled Race or enter the Youth Ice Fishing Contest.

For the warm-blooded or the cold and confused, there is truly something for everyone.

NW, Faribault, $10 . All you can bowl for $10 per person (based on 3 people per lane.) Call in reservations early as lanes will fill fast 507-334-3262.

Rock The Tree Top: 18-Dec, 12:00 PM, Paradise Center for the Arts, 321 Central Ave., Faribault, $15-$20. $10 Students. PEACE. JOY. AND ROCK AND ROLL! Look out there is a different kind of Santa coming to town! Get ready to Rock the Tree Top this holiday season as audiences are taken on a wild Sleigh Ride as beloved Holiday Classics are turned into the classic rock and roll you love.. http://www.paradisecenterforthearts.org.

High Kick Dance Competition: 18-Dec, 1:00 PM, ACGC High School, 27250 MN State Hwy 4, Grove City, $5-$6. Come and support local high school dance line teams as they compete Friday night December 18th!

320-244-4639 Morning Storytime: 18-Dec, 5:00 PM, Lonsdale Public Library, 1006 NE Birch St, Lonsdale, Free.

Bring your kids and your sense of fun to our storytimes! Help your children develop literacy and a lifelong love of books and learning. All ages are welcome.

No registration necessary.

Winter Wonderettes: 18Dec, 7:00 PM, Northfield Arts Guild Theater, 411 W. Third Street, Northfield, $13-$18. The Northfield Arts Guild presents Winter Wonderettes, an energetic and glittering musical in four-part

harmony, Fridays and Saturdays, December 11, 12, 18, 19 at 7:30 pm and Sundays, December 13 and 20 at 2:00 pm, with an additional Thursday, December 17th performance at 7:30 pm.

All performances occur at the Northfield Arts Guild Theater, 411 West Third Street, Northfield, MN. Winter Wonderettes was written and created by Roger Bean, with Vocal arrangements by Roger Bean and Brian Baker, and Musical Arrangements by Brian Baker. During the Christmas party at Harpers Hardware store, their Rent-a-Santa turns up missing and its up to the Wonderettes to keep the employees entertained.

Set in 1968, this bubbly musical is packed with humor and holiday tunes arranged in fantastic four-part harmony. With playful songs such as Mele Kalikimaka and classic favorites like Winter Wonderland and Jingle Bell Rock, the Winter Wonderettes will fill your holiday with cheer! Winter Wonderettes is directed by Justin Cervantes with musical direction

by Yvonne Freese and special guest pianist Theo Wee. The fourwoman cast stars Birch Carlson as Missy, Samantha Noonan as Cindy Lou, Esme Etter as Suzy, and Wendy Placko as Betty Jean.

Tickets are available for $18 for adults and $13 for students and seniors. Group rates are available for groups with 8 or more. In addition, the historic Archer House River Inn is offering a Play and Stay package with the purchase of Winter Wonderettes tickets.

• 301 Division St. S • • www.MrJST.com • • 507-786-9578 • Like us on at Facebook.com/MrJSTTech

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Rave On! The Buddy Holly Experience 7:30 p.m., Friday, Jan. 8 Downtown Plaza, Fairmont

There was a time, not very long ago, when everyone looked like Buddy Holly.

Why such a trend? Is Weezer to blame? It would be understandable if Buddy Holly wore the glasses for his image initially, but his eyesight was in fact, shit. Then, thanks to the idiocy of one group, Buddy Holly got dubbed the “original hipster.” What? No. Dude was an icon. And he is the only thing that kept myself from rolling out of the car during a long, dismal ride across South Dakota.

So for me, image plays no role in the authenticity of a Buddy Holly interpreter. It is the talent, unlike Elvis impersonators who should undoubtedly also have some sort of sex appeal. Yet, surprisingly that aspect is nonexistent among most of them. The hiccupping vocals and skill on a Fender Stratocaster like Holly is what makes Billy McGuigan the preferred horn-rimmed wearing lad.

McGuigan has appeared in over 450 performances of “Buddy: The Buddy Holly Story” and over double that in his own stage show “Rave On! The Buddy Holly Experience.” Billy has been noted for his high-energy and sincerity when performing the songs of Buddy Holly and his show has broken box office records in six theatres.

Sometimes he wears the glasses—sometimes he doesn’t. Either way, his craftsmanship as a musician is what will bring back memories of the 22-year-old legend.

THe

– – Autumn Van Ravenhorst, editor@southernminnscene.com

The package includes a free room upgrade, breakfast voucher at Bittersweet Caf, and certificates to use at The Bag Lady and Paper Petalum. Tickets for Winter Wonderettes may be purchased online at northfieldartsguild.org or by calling the Northfield Arts Guild at 507-645-8877. Winter Wonderettes is sponsored by Hvistendahl, Moersch, Dorsey & Hahn and by the Reiland Team of Edina Realty.

The 2015-16 Northfield Arts Guild Theater Season Sponsors are Engage Print and Neuger Communications Group.

The Playfulness of Snow: 18-Dec, 7:00 PM, Owatonna Arts Center, 435 Garden View Lane, Owatonna, Free. ‘The Playfulness of Snow’ the Owaotnna Arts Center’s Annual Christmas Display opens on Sunday Dec 6 and runs through the 27th. Gallery hours are 1-5PM Tuesday through Sunday, Closed Mondays. the month of December is time for all of to become playful children and enjoy the drifting mounds of swirling snowflakes. We see the little darlings all warmly bundled up to play with the powdered magic dust or to glide on crystalline water. Delightful little Snowbabies from department 56 in all their playfulness will be apart of ‘the Playfulness of Snow’ . The frozen pond with its diamond surface is perfect for a dance on skates.

Yes, Jerry Shore is engineering the dance and Marilyn Henke has fashioned the skaters. The child in all of us will also enjoy the world of a time gone by in London with the infamous character who had lost his joy (Scrooge) the Dickens Village by Department 56 is a part of our display. The Arts Center will be closed Christmas Eve and Christmas Day and New Years EVE and New Years Day. Gift of Music Week: 18-Dec, 7:30 PM, Minnesota Children’s Museum Rochester, 1643 N. Broadway, Rochester, $0-$5.50. $5.50 Ages 1-101; Free Children Under 1. This week we are giving the gift of music! Explore the sounds of different instruments during an instrument petting zoo on Wednesday, December 9th at 11am! We will also have a music therapist visit the Museum at 11am on Friday to talk about the healing power of music, and how you can give the gift of music. Be sure to join us for this musical event, it should be pretty sharp!

MNSure Enrollment Events: 18-Dec, 7:30 PM, Rochester, MN, , Rochester, MN, Free.

Open enrollment is November 1, 2015-January 31, 2016. Get FREE hands-on help from a MNsure certified navigator. Below is the schedule for Rochester, MN events! Olmsted County Family Support & Assistance (Walk-in

service: 2117 Campus Dr SE, Suite 100, Rochester, MN 55904) M-F: 9 a.m. 12 p.m. AND 1 p.m. 4 p.m. RCTC/University Center Rochester (when classes in session) (Walk-in service: Student Health Services, HS140, 851 30th Ave SE, Rochester, MN 55904) 2nd Monday (THROUGH 5/9/2016): 11 a.m. 3p.m. 4th Tuesday (THROUGH 5/9/2016): 11 a.m. 3p.m. Planned Parenthood (Walk-in service: 1212 7th St NW, Rochester, MN 55901) Mondays: 1:00 p.m. 4:00 p.m.

Salvation Army Lunch Program (Walk-in service: 20 1st Ave NE, Rochester, MN 55906) Thursdays: 11:30 a.m. 1 p.m. Visit www.

MNsure.org for info about all state health insurance programs, including those for low-income residents, and special enrollment options for life changes (or call 1-855-366-7873) PLEASE BRING: SOCIAL SECURITY NUMBER AND ANY IMMIGRATION DOCUMENTS FOR ALL APPLICANTS; BIRTHDATES OF ALL IN HOUSEHOLD DETAILS ABOUT ALL TYPES OF HOUSEHOLD INCOME EXPECTED IN 2015 INFORMATION ABOUT ALL OTHER HEALTH INSURANCE, including any employer sponsored insurance available to the applicants, even if they didnt enroll in it (Re-

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21

Winter Art Fair

10 a.m. – 4 p.m., Sat, Jan. 23 Sargent’s Nursery, Red Wing

South of Owatonna, you can be united in marriage at a place that is most commonly known for pumpkins in the fall and shrubs, seeds and perennials in the spring. Nurseries all over have begun using their business as an event venue—not exactly the place you would expect to attend an art show in the middle of a Minnesota winter.

But that has proven to be a popular idea at Sargent’s, a four-generation family owned nursery in Red Wing. The Winter Art Fair brings live entertainment, artwork ranging from photography and woodworking to jewelry and pottery and all in a warm, sunny venue in January.

Some of the featured artists include Heather Lawrenz of Northfield and her up-cycled jewelry, crafted from various materials. Dan Weimer of Red Wing, who is a past president of the MN Watercolor Society, uses watermedia as a means to interpret landscapes and their textures. Then there is Tom Hughes who will make you question everything you thought you knew about photography. Similar to paintings that are so natural you at one point believed them to be a photograph, Hughes photos are so stunningly vivid, they are surreal.

All others are equally notable, but this is where I tell you that this event is so great and cool that you should go.

And, that you better not complain about not having anything to do during the bitter season that is winter.

– – Autumn Van Ravenhorst, editor@southernminnscene.com

Facebook.com/redwingwinterartfair

Mankato Brewery workers Tony Feuchtenberger, Tim Tupy, Staci Schofield, and Chris Butts were in attendance at the Beer Expo. Photo courtesy of Mankato Free Press.

Mankato Craft Beer Expo 3-6 p.m., Sat, Jan. 16

Civic Center Plaza, Mankato According to several dubious websites, beer is the world’s third most consumed beverage. Inhabitants of this terrestrial sphere apparently choose water and tea over this respected refreshment. For those wanting to learn more about the nobility of beer, Chop Liver Craft Beer Festivals deliver events for both the enthusiast and unacquainted.

The company strives to create an atmosphere full of all things beer, from a large assortment of samples and educational seminars to consultation with aspiring beermakers. Over 40 craft breweries including Schell, Loon Juice, Great Lakes and Fulton will be there to fill your complimentary commemorative sampling glass.

Food will be provided by Natedogs, Pub 500 and Tav on Ave—for purchase. That means bring cash. When those brews have the same effect on your gut as they do your behavior, progressing from casual mingling to gyrating dances, you will think back, “Golly, I sure wish I would have listened to Autumn.” Happens every time.

Not sure who is providing the tuneage this year—that is to be determined. You may have to do your own research on that one.

I reserve the right to drink beer whenever I want. But, that entitlement paired with the blustering winds and short days of winter turns into somewhat of a compulsory response. Beer, libation, brewski, un-water, cerveza—I want it all come January. Pfft, let’s be real. I have a stash built up before Christmas.

– – Autumn Van Ravenhorst, editor@southernminnscene.com

cent pay stubs, W-2 forms, and tax returns are helpful!) For more information and questions, please call the Health Access Rochester MN Office: 507-589-8649.

12th Annual Textiles and Jewelry Show: 18-Dec, 9:00 PM, Crossings, 320 East Ave, Zumbrota, Free. Public Reception to meet the artists will be held on Saturday, December 5 from 6:00 - 7:15 PM. Wine and light appetizers; come as you are!

‘Songs for a Winter Solstice’

by Ann Reed with Joan Griffith: 18-Dec, 8:00 PM, Crossings at Carnegie, 320 East Avenue, Zumbrota, $16-$18.

Singer, songwriter and guitarist Ann Reed and bassist/instrumentalist Joan Griffith will perform songs sure to brighten even the darkest night. Reed has been performing and creating community for more than 35 years with songs that find a permanent place in

the heart. Of course, some of her songs and stories might end up closer to your funny bone a little irreverence never hurt anyone (507) 732-7616 A Very Electric Christmas: 19-Dec, 7:30 PM, Ames Center, 12600 Nicollet Avenue, Burnsville, $23.25-$40. Bring the whole family for some great family fun!

AlAnon for Familes and Friends of Alcoholics: 19-Dec,

9:00 AM, Alano Club Faribault, 217 Central Ave., Faribault, Free.

New comers welcome. For more info contact 334-3434.

Full Belly Soup Kitchen: 19-Dec, 5:00 PM, Cathedral Guild House, 515 2nd Ave, Faribault, Donations welcome.. Full meal served.

Dena Houston’s Family Benefit: 19-Dec, 5:00 PM, American Legion, 212 West Main Str, Kasson, Free. Dena is a young women diagnosed with stage 4 cancer. A benefit to help the family’s growing financial burden will be at the American Legion in Kasson on Dec 19th.beginning at 5pm. There will be door prizes, a silent auction and bake sale Winter Wonderettes: 19-Dec, 7:30 PM, Northfield Arts Guild Theater, 411 W. Third Street, Northfield, $13-$18.

Free Movie Night: 19-Dec, 7:00 PM, Northfield High School Auditorium, 1400 Division Street South, Northfield, Free. The Mayor’s Youth Council is presenting a free showing of ‘National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation’ at the High School Auditorium.

The movie is open to all and is made possible by a grant from Northfield YouthBank. (507) 663-0630 The Playfulness of Snow: 19-Dec, 1:00 PM, Owatonna Arts Center, 435 Garden View Lane, Owatonna, Free Christmas Tea with a Plus!: 19-Dec, 1:30 PM, Assisi Heights Spirituality Center, 1001 14th St NW, Rochester, $32 . Tis that time of year to reflect on the values of the Christmas season! Stroll through the beautifully decorated parlors of Assisi Heights, while pondering the message in a quiet and reflective manner as you listen to the songs of the season.

Gwen Buckingham, a connoisseur and collector of historic Christmas movies from the good old days, will give you a tour of Hollywoods best and ageless films while accentuating the values of the season. Finally, relax with family or friends telling your own stories of Christmases past, while enjoying a cup of Christmas Tea and a variety of sweet desserts! Please provide the names of each guest when registering December 19, Check-in 1:30pm, Program 2:00pm, Tea 3:00pm $32 per person, pre-registration

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contact information - Information about all other health insurance, including any employer-provided health insurance available to each person applying, even if they didn’t enroll in it--if your employer offers health coverage to you, please have them complete this form and bring it with you to the library Languages Available: English Type of Assisters Available: Navigator Event Address: Rochester Public Library 101 2nd Street SE Second Floor - Computer lab at top of stairs Rochester, MN 55904.

The Tenors: 19-Dec, 8:00 PM, Treasure Island Resort and Casino Minnesota, 5734 Sturgeon Lake Road, Welch, $23.50-$33.50. The Tenors are bringing their unique blend of classical music and contemporary pop to the Event Center at Treasure Island Resort & Casino on December 19, just in time for the holidays. The voices of Clifton Murray, Fraser Walters, Remigio Pereira and Victor Micallef will fill the Event Center with songs from their current album, Under One Sky, along with songs from their previous albums and more. For ticket or other information contact the Island Box Office at 1-877-849-1640.Tickets are $23.50, $28.50 & $33.50. The show is Saturday, December 19.

Doors open at 7pm and concert starts 8pm. Must be 12 years of age or older to attend. Guests under the age of 18 must be accompanied by a legal guardian.

1-800-222-7077 12th Annual Textiles and Jewelry Show: 19-Dec, 12:00 PM, Crossings, 320 East Ave, Zumbrota, Free. Public Reception to meet the artists will be held on Saturday, December 5 from 6:00 - 7:15 PM. Wine and light appetizers; come as you are!

Bluegrass Holiday Show: 19Dec, 7:30 PM, Crossings at Carnegie, 320 East Avenue, Zumbrota, $16-$19. The High 48s make music that combines the soulful sound of classic bluegrass with a modern attitude. Theyll bring that sensibility to their Bluegrass Holiday Show. As traditional bluegrass bands go, The High 48s are about as non-traditional as they come. (507) 732-7616 Turn Of The Screw: 20-Dec, 2:00 PM, Ames Center, 12600 Nicollet Avenue, Burnsville, $17$22. Come out and see a great performance!

required by December 10. Space is limited.

Gift of Music Week: 19-Dec, All Day, Minnesota Children’s Museum Rochester, 1643 N. Broadway, Rochester, $0-$5.50. $5.50 Ages 1-101; Free Children Under 1. This week we are giving the gift of music! Explore the sounds of different instruments during an instrument petting zoo on Wednesday, December 9th at 11am! We will also have a music therapist visit the Museum at 11am on Friday to talk about the healing power of music, and how you can give the gift of music. Be sure to join us for this musical event, it should be pretty sharp!

Auditions for Its a Wonderful Life: 19-Dec, 7:00 PM, Rochester Civic Theatre, 20 Civic Center Dr SE, Rochester, Free.

Audition for our holiday production of ‘It’s A Wonderful Life’ on Monday October 12 and Tuesday October 13 at 7 pm sharp at the Rochester Civic Theatre. We are looking for: - 13 male actors (Age 20’s - 70’s) - 9 female actor (Age 20’s - 70’s) - Youth Actors: 4 boys (Age 10 - 12) and 2 girls (age 7 - 9) Rehearsals are scheduled to begin on Monday, October 19.

Performances are scheduled from December 4 - 20. If you wish to audition but unable to attend the given dates, contact Director Greg Miller at greg@rochestercivictheatre.org to schedule a possible private audition. Come be a part of the fun at the Rochester Civic Theatre! 507-282-8481 Rochester Public Library Enrollment Assistance: 19Dec, 9:30 AM, Rochester Public Library, 101 SE 2nd Street, Rochester, Free. Certified navigator available for walk-in assistance using MNsure.org What to bring to help complete your application: - Social security number for each person applying - Date of birth for everyone in household - For non-citizens, Green Card or other immigration documents for each person applying - Most recent pay stubs (for last 30 days) for all employed household members Detailed information/documents for all other sources of income (social security, unemployment, self-employment, year-to-date income from previous jobs, all other income.) - Most recent year’s tax form (1040EZ or Page 1 of 1040) and W2 form(s) are helpful - Employer’s address and

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Amazing Love Recovery Group: 20-Dec, 6:00 PM, St. Luke’s Church, 1100 Ninth Ave S.W., Faribault, Free. A recovery group for spiritual growth. All who struggle with addiction are invited to join to learn, encourage and support one another as Christians seeking to recover from the effects of addiction.

Candle Lighting Ceremony: 20-Dec, 2:00 PM, St. Rose, 10155 505th St, Kenyon, Free.

You’re invited to celebrate the season on Sunday, December 20th, at 2:00 PM and enjoy music by vocalists and Brass Etc. Thank you for your continued interest in preserving this historic site.

Winter Wonderettes: 20-Dec, 2:00 PM, Northfield Arts Guild Theater, 411 W. Third Street, Northfield, $13-$18 Northfield Humanist Roundtable: The Future Of An Illusion: 20-Dec, 10:00 AM, Northfield Senior Center, Room 106, 1651 Jefferson Parkway, Northfield, Free. The Northfield Humanist Roundtable is a monthly discussion group which addresses the history, philosophy, and practical application of secular humanism.

The discussion format uses a brief introduction followed by questions which each participant may respond to in turn. For our December meeting we will address The Future of an Illusion by Sigmund Freud. Freud wrote The Future of an Illusion in 1927, near the end of his life.

In this very short book he argues that religious ideas are neurotic illusions that serve the purpose of wish fulfillment and that our long-term goal should be to cure people of the neurosis of religion. Well look at several short passages from The Future of an Illusion like this one: [Defending religion is] defending a lost cause.

We may insist as often as we like that mans intellect is powerless in comparison with his instinctual life, and we may be right in this. Nevertheless, there is something peculiar about this weakness. The voice of the intellect is a soft one, but it does not rest till it has gained a hearing. Finally, after a countless succession of rebuffs, it succeeds. This is

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The Best of Hank and Rita 7:30 p.m., Sat, Jan. 2

$5 OFF

State Theatre, Zumbrota

NG ANY TANNI IN PACKAGE R DECEMBE

Citypages.com – Photo courtesy of Ann Fee. It was, without question, the most original new show I saw all year. A real life singing duo, Joe Tougas and Anne Rosenquist Fee who generally perform as The Frye, portraying a fictional married singing duo (Tougas and Rosenquist Fee are not married to each other) at the end of the line. The Best of Hank and Rita is a blast of fresh air wrapped in a faux leather sport coat and a whole lot of mascara.

Tougas and Rosenquist Fee have an undeniable chemistry on stage, which is to be expected from two people who have played music together for more than ten years. After being asked for the millionth time if they were married after one show, the two decided that they should take advantage of that chemistry.

Shortly thereafter, they came up with the star crossed alter egos of Hank and Rita.

Set in 1986, Hank and Rita had once been on top of the

one of the few points on which one may be optimistic about the future of mankind, but it is in itself a point of no small importance. For each passage, well discuss to what extent we agree or disagree with Freuds reasoning. Following the discussion, from 11:00 am to 12:00 noon, there will be an optional brunch with a small buffet. Donations will be accepted for brunch. Please come join us. There is no charge and everyone sympathetic with humanist principles is welcome.

To learn more, visit our website at www.northfieldhumanis-

troundtable.org.

The Playfulness of Snow: 20-Dec, 1:00 PM, Owatonna Arts Center, 435 Garden View Lane, Owatonna, Free.

Gift of Music Week: 20-Dec, All Day, Minnesota Children’s Museum Rochester, 1643 N. Broadway, Rochester, $0-$5.50. $5.50 Ages 1-101; Free Children Under 1. This week we are giving the gift of music! Explore the sounds of different instruments during an instrument petting zoo on Wednesday, December 9th at 11am! We will also have a music therapist visit

Country charts. But those days are well past them, and in the present hank is much better known for the time he spends in tabloid headlines. Rita has had enough, and is planning to leave Hank after one more show, which plays out right before our eyes.

Throughout the performance, the audience knows Rita’s plan, but there are enough twists and turns to keep everybody guessing.

This is a triumph for both Rosenquist and Fee. Between the original music and the performances by both, the Zumbrota State Theater will start to feel like a stale barroom. You’ll care about both characters, hoping for the best but expecting the worst. The show is charming, heartbreaking, funny and touching. Hank and Rita will take you on a bumpy yet unforgettable ride.

– – Rich Larson, editor@southernminnscene.com

the Museum at 11am on Friday to talk about the healing power of music, and how you can give the gift of music. Be sure to join us for this musical event, it should be pretty sharp!. .

Rochester Civic Theatre: AUDITIONS for Its a Wonderful Life: 20-Dec, 2:00 PM, Rochester Civic Theatre, 20 Civic Center Dr SE, Rochester, Free. Audition for our holiday production of ‘It’s A Wonderful Life’ on Monday October 12 and Tuesday October 13 at 7 pm sharp at the Rochester Civic Theatre. We are looking for: - 13 male actors (Age 20’s -

ter Public Library, 101 SE 2nd Street, Rochester, Free.

12th Annual Textiles and Jewelry Show: 20-Dec, 12:00 PM, Crossings, 320 East Ave, Zumbrota, Free.

God Wants You Well Bible Study: 21-Dec, 6:30 PM, Inspirational Technologies, Inc. Building, 1100 N. 4th Street, Le Sueur, Free. DVD series with Andrew Wommack, healing miracle testimonies, Bible study lessons, discussion, communion, prayer. Everyone invited.

Led by Dorothy Von Lehe.

70’s) - 9 female actor (Age 20’s - 70’s) - Youth Actors: 4 boys (Age 10 - 12) and 2 girls (age 7 - 9) Rehearsals are scheduled to begin on Monday, October 19. Performances are scheduled from December 4 - 20. If you wish to audition but unable to attend the given dates, contact Director Greg Miller at greg@rochestercivictheatre.org to schedule a possible private audition. Come be a part of the fun at the Rochester Civic Theatre! 507-282-8481 Rochester Public Library Enrollment Assistance: 20-Dec, 1:30 PM, Roches-

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| JANUARY 2016

23

Todd Rundgren 8:30 p.m., Wed. Jan. 27 Ames Center, Burnsville

Evkirche-bad-schmiedeberg.de Now this is a coup. Todd Rundgren is kind of a recluse. He’s a little bit press shy, despite the fact that he always something interesting to say. He’s had a remarkably prolific career, writing some of the greatest hooks in all of pop music over the last 40 years, yet the song most people know him by is that insipid “I don’t want to work, I just want to bang on the drum all day” song that you hear when you’re watching a Green Bay Packers home game.

I’m one of those people who believes he belongs in the Rock & Roll Hall of Fame, and I know doesn’t have much of a chance at an honor like that, because he doesn’t play the game. He could have been a huge rock star at point if he’d just agreed to the proper promotion. Instead he’s one of those guys you call a “musician’s musician.”

But do yourself a favor, dig way back into your parents’ vinyl collection, and pull out that dusty copy of his 1972 double album Something/Anything?. Check out the first two songs, “I Saw the Light” and “It Wouldn’t Have Made Any Difference.” Listen to how seamlessly he combines those easy 70’s melodies with a little R&B and a little Philly Soul. Now go listen to “Wolfman Jack.” I defy to not shake some part of your body. Finally, listen to “Hello It’s Me.” The melody is amazing, as are the bass line and the Hammond Organ, but it’s the lyrics that get you. Then pick any other album in his catalogue, and have the same experience all over again.

Rundgren will be at the Ames Center in Burnsville on January 27. He popped up for a show at Mill City Nights in Minneapolis a year or so ago, but before that, I can’t remember the last time he played around here. The opportunity to see this brilliant man in an intimate setting like the Ames is too much to pass up. Get your tickets. Now.

Facebook.com/thepinesmusic

The Pines 7:30 p.m., Sat, Jan. 9

– – Rich Larson, editor@southernminnscene.com

Northfield Arts Guild Theater

8:00 p.m., Sat, Jan. 16 Oak Center General Store I want to write something to the effect of “Ladies and Gentlemen, please welcome the Pines back,” but they never really left. Yes, they have a new album ready, scheduled to be released in early February, and yes, it’s the first new music we’ve heard from them since the utterly gorgeous and slightly creepy Dark So Gold was released nearly four years ago. But The Pines are an incredibly hard working band. It wold not have taken a lot of effort to catch one of there shows, be it their annual Winter-season opening performance at the Oak Center General Store, or a hastily arranged and announced post MWMF affair at Ed’s (no name) Bar in Winona.

They have traveled the country over the last couple years, playing from Virginia to Washington State. So, I want to welcome them back, but they’d just kind of look at me with a “we didn’t go anywhere” look. So, I’ll just keep my mouth shut.

If you haven’t heard The Pines, I don’t know what you’re waiting for. In a Midwest Americana scene stocked to the gills with incredible musicians and songwriters, The Pines (David Huckfelt, Benson Ramsey and a shifting cast of musicians that will generally include Ramsey’s brother Alex) stand among the best. Their brand of music is a quiet and spooky blend of country and folk with elements of ragtime, electronica, and classical dropped in for good measure.

The new album, Above the Prairie, is due February 5. Before then, you’ll have a couple opportunities to see them. This should make the late winter plenty bearable.

– – Rich Larson, editor@southernminnscene.com

Contact Dorothy at dvonlehe@ mchsi.com or 507-665-6965.

12th Annual Textiles and Jewelry Show: 21-Dec, 12:00 PM, Crossings, 320 East Ave, Zumbrota, Free.

Community Cathedral Cafe: 22-Dec, 5:00 PM, Cathedral Guild House, 101 Sixth St. N.W., Faribault, Free. Free nutritious meal.

Free Tutoring for Adults: 22Dec, 9:30 AM, Washington Community Center, 117 Shumway Ave,

Faribault, Free. Free individualized tutoring in math, reading or writing. No registration necessary.

9:30-11:30 a.m. and 6-8 p.m.

Bedtime Storytime: 22-Dec, 6:30 PM, Lonsdale Public Library, 1006 NE Birch St, Lonsdale, Free.

Bring your kids and your sense of fun to our storytimes! Help your children develop literacy and a lifelong love of books and learning. Tuesday storytimes usually also include a craft to take home.

All ages are welcome. No registration necessary.

Euchre Night: 22-Dec, 7:00 PM, Morristown American Legion, 101 W. Main St., Morristown, $3 .

Euchre night. 507-685-2288 Area Suicide Grief Support Group Meeting: 22-Dec, 7:00 PM, Mayo Clinic Health System (Hospital), 301 2nd St NE, New Prague, Free. Fourth Tuesday of the month, in the Jameen Mape Conference Room. For more information call Tom Handrich at 952-445-0107 or 952-913-3994.

952-758-4431 The Playfulness of Snow: 22-Dec, 1:00 PM, Owatonna Arts Center, 435 Garden View Lane, Owatonna, Free.

12th Annual Textiles and Jewelry Show: 22-Dec, 12:00 PM, Crossings, 320 East Ave, Zumbrota, Free.

Full Belly Soup Kitchen: 23-Dec, 5:00 PM, Cathedral Guild House, 515 2nd Ave, Faribault, Donations welcome.. Full meal served.

Free Tutoring for Adults:

23-Dec, 9:30 AM, Washington Community Center, 117 Shumway Ave, Faribault, Free.

The Playfulness of Snow: 23-Dec, 1:00 PM, Owatonna Arts Center, 435 Garden View Lane, Owatonna, Free.

Lorie Line: Christmas In The City: 23-Dec, 7:30 PM, Mayo Civic Center Presentation Hall, 30 Civic Center Drive SE, Rochester, $43-$48. Join us to witness a breath taking performance on our stage!

Gift of Giving Week: 23-Dec, 9:00 AM, Minnesota Children’s Museum Rochester, 1643 N. Broadway, Rochester, $0-$5.50. $5.50 Ages 1-101; Free Children Under 1. We will be making homemade gifts to give to your loved ones on Wednesday. This is a great way to show someone you care! The Museum will be closed Thursday, December 24th and Friday, December 25th for Christmas Eve and Christmas Day. Deck the Halls: 23-Dec, 2:00 PM, Rochester Senior Center, 121 N Broadway Ave, Rochester, $7$10. Tickets are $7 for members and $10 for non-member. This wonderful four person show consists of a baritone, who has played with the Minnesota Opera, a jazz singer pianist, who has performed regularly at The Saint

Paul Hotel, along with a marvelous bassist and violinist! These are four skilled musicians who love to celebrate all of the music of the Christmas Season from classical to swing, with joy and beauty! Cookies and treats will be provided after the show. Tickets are $7 for members and $10 for non-member and can be picked up from the Rochester Senior Center Business Office.

12th Annual Textiles and Jewelry Show: 23-Dec, 12:00 PM, Crossings, 320 East Ave, Zumbrota, Free.

Weekly Shot Clinic: 24-Dec, 3:00 PM, Mower County Health and Human Services, 201 1st Street NE, Austin, See Website.

Weekly shot clinics at Mower County Health and Human Services will be changing from Friday afternoons to Thursday afternoons beginning October 4. The time will be from 3pm - 4:30pm each Thursday afternoon. Weekly shot clinics will be at the same location, the Health and Human Services building at the Oak Park Mall in Austin. Any questions, please contact Mower County Health and Human Services at 507-437-9701.

12th Annual Textiles and Jewelry Show: 24-Dec, 12:00 PM, Crossings, 320 East Ave,

Zumbrota, Free. .

Full Belly Soup Kitchen: 25-Dec, 5:00 PM, Cathedral Guild House, 515 2nd Ave, Faribault, Donations welcome.. Full meal served.

Preston Community Christmas Turkey Dinner: 25-Dec, 12:00 PM, Preston Servicemen’s Club, 217 St Paul St SW, Preston, Free. Free to anyone in the area who is alone or away from family on Christmas! Singles, couples and children welcome! For reservations please contact Ib Gatzke at 507.251.0206 or Gabby Kinneberg at 507.259.7532 or email gabbykinneberg@gmail. com If you are interested in donating to the dinner in any way, please contact Ib or Gabby. We hope to see you there!

Tuyet Trang: 25-Dec, 8:00 PM, Mystic Lake Casino Hotel, 2400 Mystic Lake Blvd, Prior Lake, $23-$32. Spend Christmas Day with some of Vietnams most amazing artists, including Ngoc Anh, Luong Tung Quang, Mai Thie Van, Thien Ton, Henry Chuc and Huong Tram. The Ban Nhac Hoang Thi Thi will also showcase their extraordinary talents at this event filled with fun, laughter and world-class entertainment. (952) 445-9000 AlAnon for Familes and

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Friends of Alcoholics: 26-Dec, 9:00 AM, Alano Club Faribault, 217 Central Ave., Faribault, Free. New comers welcome. For more info contact 334-3434.

Full Belly Soup Kitchen: 26-Dec, 5:00 PM, Cathedral Guild House, 515 2nd Ave, Faribault, Donations welcome.. Full meal served.

The Playfulness of Snow: 26-Dec, 1:00 PM, Owatonna Arts Center, 435 Garden View Lane, Owatonna, Free.

Bingo: 26-Dec, 1:00 PM, American Legion, 315 First Avenue NW, Rochester, See Website. Bingo is held the second and fourth Saturday of the month. Come join friends for lunch and play.

Gift Of Giving Week: 26Dec, 9:00 AM, Minnesota Children’s Museum Rochester, 1643 N. Broadway, Rochester, $0-$5.50. $5.50 Ages 1-101; Free Children Under 1. We will be making homemade gifts to give to your loved ones on Wednesday. This is a great way to show someone you care! The Museum will be closed Thursday, December 24th and Friday, December 25th for Christmas Eve and Christmas Day. 12th Annual Textiles and Jewelry Show: 26Dec, 12:00 PM, Crossings, 320 East Ave, Zumbrota, Free.

Dec 27-Jan 2: Amazing Love Recovery Group: 27-Dec, 6:00 PM, St. Luke’s Church, 1100 Ninth Ave S.W., Faribault, Free. A recovery group for spiritual growth. All who struggle with addiction are invited to join to learn, encourage and support one another as Christians

seeking to recover from the effects of addiction.

The Playfulness of Snow: 27-Dec, 1:00 PM, Owatonna Arts Center, 435 Garden View Lane, Owatonna, Free.

Gift of Giving Week: 27-Dec, All Day, Minnesota Children’s Museum Rochester, 1643 N. Broadway, Rochester, $0-$5.50. $5.50 Ages 1-101; Free Children Under 1. We will be making homemade gifts to give to your loved ones on Wednesday. This is a great way to show someone you care! The Museum will be closed Thursday, December 24th and Friday, December 25th for Christmas Eve and Christmas Day. 12th Annual Textiles and Jewelry Show: 27Dec, 12:00 PM, Crossings, 320 East Ave, Zumbrota, Free. Public Reception to meet the artists will be held on Saturday, December 5 from 6:00 - 7:15 PM. Wine and light appetizers; come as you are!

Auditions for Almost, Maine: 28-Dec, 7:00 PM, Rochester Civic Theatre, 20 Civic Center Dr SE, Rochester, Free. All members of the public are encouraged to audition. We are looking for up to 10 men and up to 8 women (ages 20’s to 40’s) for this romantic comedy.

Please visit our web page at rochestercivictheatre.org for more information about auditions. 507-282-8481 12th Annual Textiles and Jewelry Show: 28Dec, 12:00 PM, Crossings, 320 East Ave, Zumbrota, Free.

Community Cathedral Cafe: 29-Dec, 5:00 PM, Cathedral Guild House, 101

Turn

Southern Minnesota’s Largest Wine Cellar & Craft Beer Selection Karlandre.wordpress.com Photo courtesy of Karl Andre.

The Complete Works of William Shakespeare (Abridged) January 29-31, February 4-6 7:30 p.m., Matinees at 2 p.m.

Paradise Center for the Arts, Faribault Among the most prominent and influential plays in English Literature is “Hamlet,” written by William Shakespeare. And in that play, Lord Polonius says to the king and queen something that has become a known English proverb, “Brevity is the soul of wit.” It is ironic to note that the Bard has probably never been associated with that term, except when referencing this scene and the context in which it was used as it was rather contradictory; it wasn’t very brief. Maybe it wasn’t paradoxical at all—I don’t know. I dost not get Shakespeare.

The Reduced Shakespeare Company, creators of this production, are a threeman comedy troupe known for reducing the seemingly incondensable in to hilarious short versions of the original. In this case, they deliver all 37 plays of Shakespeare in 97 minutes. In addition to this feat, they took on “Lost” and condensed the first five seasons in to a 10-minute film. For me, that achievement is as incomprehensible as “The Complete Works of William Shakespeare (abridged)” is to a bardophile.

The show will feature Titus Andronicus as a cooking show, Othello as a rap song, Hamlet in 5 seconds, Hamlet backwards in 42 seconds and other comical recreations.

Knowledge is always helpful when it comes to this wordy poet, but three men in Chuck Taylor’s were able to radically summarize Shakespeare in a language we all understand—comedy.

– – Autumn Van Ravenhorst, editor@southernminnscene.com

Breakfast Specials

Merry Christmas & Happy New Year!

MON - SAT 7-11AM SUN 8:30 - 11:30AM

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8-10AM Happy Hour $1 OFF DRINKS

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Bingo Every Friday 7PM

2-for-1 Specials Saturday!

9PM - 12AM

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Valentine’s Day! (Sunday, February 14)

Haskell’s will have a Huge Selection of Champagne & Bubbly Wines.

Build Your Own Burger SUNDAY 12-8PM

Your Southern Minnesota Tech Support

Specializing in Apple, Mac OS & iOS

HAPPY HOUR M-TH 8 – 10 AM M-F 3:30 – 6:30 PM Downtown Dundas • 507-645-8987

Phone Support | On-Site Service Remote Assistance

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Facebook.com/ronniemilsap

Ronnie Milsap 7:30 p.m., Sat, Jan. 23 Mystic Lake Casino When you think of what your standard country music star looks like, you probably think of a tall, fit looking guy, with a couple days stubble wearing either a cowboy hat or a dirty, oil stained ballcap holding a guitar. You probably don’t picture a blind piano player.

But, I’ll tell you, there was a day when that blind piano player, Ronnie Milsap, was one of the biggest stars in country music. Between 1970 and 1989, Milsap registered no less than 40 (40!!) #1 hits on the country charts. On top of that, he had a number of hits crossover onto the pop charts including “Stranger in My House,” “It Was Almost Like A Song,” “Any Day Now,” and the immortal “Smokey Mountain Rain.”

His story is like something out of a movie (frankly, I’m shocked they haven’t made a movie about him somewhere). Born with a congenital defect costing him his sight, he was abandoned by his mother as an infant and raised by his grandparents in the Smoky Mountains. Eventually he was sent to an academy for the blind where his musical talents were quickly discovered and fostered. As a young man looking to break into the music industry, he played with the likes of JJ Cale, Charley Pride and Elvis Presley. After bouncing around through numerous record companies, he finally signed with Capitol Records releasing his debut album in 1970. The rest is history.

I’m pleased and surprised to see the 72 year old Milsap coming to Mystic Lake on January 23. A few years ago he announced what he called at the time his “farewell tour.” Whether that didn’t take, or this is a one off show is immaterial. Milsap is a guy you want to go see.

– – Rich Larson, editor@southernminnscene.com

Sixth St. N.W., Faribault, Free.

Free nutritious meal.

Free Tutoring for Adults: 29Dec, 9:30 AM, Washington Community Center, 117 Shumway Ave, Faribault, Free. Free individual-

ized tutoring in math, reading or writing. No registration necessary.

9:30-11:30 a.m. and 6-8 p.m.

Free TutoBedtime Storytime: 29-Dec, 6:30 PM, Lonsdale Public Library, 1006 NE Birch

St, Lonsdale, Free. Bring your kids and your sense of fun to our storytimes! Help your children develop literacy and a lifelong love of books and learning.

Tuesday storytimes usually also

26 w w w. s o u t h e r N m I N n SCENE. c o m | J A N U A R Y 2 0 1 6

include a craft to take home. All ages are welcome. No registration necessary.

Free TutoEuchre Night: 29-Dec, 7:00 PM, Morristown American Legion, 101 W. Main St., Morristown, $3 Euchre night.

507-685-2288 Free TutoAuditions for Almost, Maine: 29-Dec, 7:00 PM, Rochester Civic Theatre, 20 Civic Center Dr SE, Rochester, Free. All members of the public are encouraged to audition. We are looking for up to 10 men and up to 8 women (ages 20’s to 40’s) for this romantic comedy. Please visit our web page at rochestercivictheatre.org for more information about auditions.507-282-8481 12th Annual Textiles and Jewelry Show: 29-Dec, 12:00 PM, Crossings, 320 East Ave, Zumbrota, Free.

Full Belly Soup Kitchen: 30-Dec, 5:00 PM, Cathedral Guild House, 515 2nd Ave, Faribault, Donations welcome.. Full meal served.

Free Tutoring for Adults: 30-Dec, 9:30 AM, Washington Community Center, 117 Shumway Ave, Faribault, Free.

Gift of New Week: 30-Dec, All Day, Minnesota Children’s Museum Rochester, 1643 N. Broadway, Rochester, $0-$5.50. $5.50 Ages 1-101; Free Children Under 1. Prepare for the new year with Make Your Own Noise Makers at the Museum on Wednesday, December 30. These are fantastic for celebrating the ball drop! The Museum will be closed Thursday, December 31 for New Years Eve, with exception of the Noon New Years Eve party and The Great Snowball Gala (pre-registration required).

12th Annual Textiles and Jewelry Show: 30-Dec, 12:00 PM, Crossings, 320 East Ave, Zumbrota, Free.

Weekly Shot Clinic: 31-Dec, 3:00 PM, Mower County Health and Human Services, 201 1st Street NE, Austin, See Website.

Weekly shot clinics at Mower County Health and Human Services will be changing from Friday afternoons to Thursday afternoons beginning October 4. The time will be from 3pm - 4:30pm each Thursday afternoon. Weekly shot clinics will be at the same location, the Health and Human Services building at the Oak Park Mall in Austin. Any questions, please contact Mower County Health and Human Services at 507-437-9701.

Louie Anderson Live: 31-Dec, 7:00 PM, Ames Center, 12600

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Nicollet Avenue, Burnsville, $32.95-$102.95. Come out and see a great performance!

Free TutoBar Bingo: 31-Dec, 6:00 PM, Faribault Eagles Club, 2027 Grant Street N.W., Faribault, $1 . Join us for a night of Bar Bingo!

Free TutoBar Bingo: 31-Dec, 6:00 PM, Faribault Eagles Club, 2027 Grant Street N.W., Faribault, $1 Baskets served from 5-7 p.m.

New Year’s Eve Bash with the Shane Martin Band: 31-Dec, 8:00 PM, New Ulm Event Center, 301 20th Street South, New Ulm, $10 . Come help us bring in the New Year at the New Ulm Event Center, with the Shane Martin Band! Doors will open at 8:00 p.m. Band will play from 8:30-12:30 a.m. 21+ event Tickets will be $10 and sold only at the door!

Free Tuto12th Annual Textiles and Jewelry Show: 31-Dec, 12:00 PM, Crossings, 320 East Ave, Zumbrota, Free.

Free TutoGift Of New Week: 1-Jan, 9:00 AM, Minnesota Children’s Museum Rochester, 1643 N. Broadway, Rochester, $0$5.50. $5.50 Ages 1-101; Free Children Under 1.

Preschool Early Literacy Class: 1-Jan, 10:30 AM, Shakopee Library, 235 S. Lewis St, Shakopee, Free. Preschoolers age 3-5 will ‘ Talk, Sing, Read, Write & Play ‘ their way into developing valuable pre-reading skills with their parents &caregivers in our FREE and FUN early literacy classes. Did you notice? storytimes led by library staff trained in Every Child Ready to Read curriculum are now called ‘classes’ - still all the fun and learning of storytime but the term ‘classes’ more accurately reflects the learning and teaching that happens in these classes.. www. melsascott.evanced.info.

Gift of New Week: 2-Jan, 9:00 AM, Minnesota Children’s Museum Rochester, 1643 N. Broadway, Rochester, $0-$5.50. $5.50 Ages 1-101; Free Children Under 1. Prepare for the new year with Make Your Own Noise Makers at the Museum on Wednesday, December 30. These are fantastic for celebrating the ball drop! The Museum will be closed Thursday, December 31 for New Years Eve, with exception of the Noon New Years Eve party and The Great Snowball Gala (pre-registration required).

Quarry Hill Bird Walk: 2-Jan, 9:00 AM, Quarry Hill Nature Center, 701 Silver Creek Rd NE, Rochester, Free. Join us on a

casual walk through Quarry Hill Park. Bring binoculars if you have them, some are available to borrow from the Nature Center. Dress for the weather. Families and children are welcome. Stay for any length of time. Walks usually last about one hour. Free and open to the public - no registration required. Audubon leaders: Terry & Joyce Grier.

Free TutoThe Best of Hank and Rita: A Barroom Operetta in One Act,: 2-Jan, 7:30 PM, State Theater, 96 E 4th St, Zumbrota, $15-$18. Minnesota acoustic duo The Frye portrays a vintage pop-country act on the brink of a breakup in The Best of Hank and Rita: A Barroom Operetta in One Act. Start with a breakup letter, follow with pop and country music, and add an unexpected request.

January 3-9: Free TutoGift of New Week: 3-Jan, All Day, Minnesota Children’s Museum Rochester, 1643 N. Broadway, Rochester, $0-$5.50. $5.50 Ages 1-101; Free Children Under 1. Prepare for the new year with Make Your Own Noise Makers at the Museum on Wednesday, December 30.

These are fantastic for celebrating the ball drop! The Museum will be closed Thursday, December 31 for New Years Eve, with exception of the Noon New Years Eve party and The Great Snowball Gala (pre-registration required).

Rochester Public Library Enrollment Assistance: 3-Jan, 1:30 PM, Rochester Public Library, 101 SE 2nd Street, Rochester, Free. Certified navigator available for walk-in assistance using MNsure.org What to bring to help complete your application: - Social security number for each person applying - Date of birth for everyone in household - For non-citizens, Green Card or other immigration documents for each person applying - Most recent pay stubs (for last 30 days) for all employed household members Detailed information/documents for all other sources of income (social security, unemployment, self-employment, year-to-date income from previous jobs, all other income.) - Most recent year’s tax form (1040EZ or Page 1 of 1040) and W2 form(s) are helpful - Employer’s address and contact information - Information about all other health insurance, including any employer-provided health insurance available to each person applying, even if they didn’t enroll in it--if your employer offers health coverage to

you, please have them complete this form and bring it with you to the library Languages Available: English Type of Assisters Available: Navigator Event Address: Rochester Public Library 101 2nd Street SE Second Floor - Computer lab at top of stairs Rochester, MN 55904.

Free TutoSundowners Car Club Meeting: 6-Jan, 7:30 PM, Northfield VFW Post 4393, 516 Division Street, Northfield, Free.

Founded in 1992, the Sundowners Car Club is for the car enthusiast that likes special interest vehicles. Whether you own one, are building one, or just dreaming of owning one, this is the club for you. (507) 645-8546 Free TutoHealthy Happy Hour: 6-Jan, 6:00 PM, Cambria, 400 S Broadway, Rochester, Free. Purium is taking the world by storm with it’s plant based nutrition plan. Lose 5-20 pounds in 10 day with either our 10 day transformation or our Athletic transformation. 60 day money back guarantee!! Come see what we are all about and get a $50 gift card just for stopping by!

The Buddy Holly Experience: 8-Jan, 7:30 PM, Fairmont Opera House, 45 Downtown Plaza, Fairmont, $10-$20. Student $10.00 Adult $20.00. Rave on!

507-238-4900 Minnesota State Hockey: 8-Jan, 7:00 PM, Verizon Wireless Center Mankato MN, 1 Civic Center Plaza, Mankato, See Website. vs. Northern Michigan. (507) 387-8443 Chris Young: 8-Jan, 7:30 PM, Mayo Civic Center Presentation Hall, 30 Civic Center Drive SE, Rochester, See Website. At the age of 30, Chris Young has accomplished more than some artists do in a lifetime. Already a Grammy-nominated vocalist, he’s also a dynamic live performer who plays a powerhouse show packed with hits, including chart toppers ‘Gettin’ You Home,’ ‘Voices,’ ‘Tomorrow,’ and ‘Who I Am With You.’ With four albums to his credit, Young has amassed six #1 singles, seven Gold/Platinum certifications and performed for audiences ranging from Good Morning America to Australia and Dublin to The Late Show with David Letterman. The RCA Records artist is an international ambassador for his genre, a talented songwriter, and a southern gentleman who is frequently declared one of country music’s sexiest men by People and Country Weekly magazines. With the release of his most recent

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record, ‘I’m Comin’ Over,’ from his highly anticipated fifth studio album due November 13, Young is just as well known for his classic baritone as he is for melt-your-heart ballads and is winning audiences across the globe. Join the conversation with Chris Young’s more than 2.5 million followers on Facebook, Instagram and Twitter and get tickets to catch him on tour at www.chrisyoungcountry.com.

Free TutoMNSure Enrollment Events: 8-Jan, 9:00 AM, Rochester, MN, , Rochester, MN, Free. Open enrollment is November 1, 2015-January 31, 2016. Get FREE hands-on help from a MNsure certified navigator. Below is the schedule for Rochester, MN events! Olmsted County Family Support & Assistance (Walk-in service: 2117 Campus Dr SE, Suite 100, Rochester, MN 55904) M-F: 9 a.m. 12 p.m. AND 1 p.m.

4 p.m. RCTC/University Center Rochester (when classes in session) (Walk-in service: Student Health Services, HS140, 851 30th Ave SE, Rochester, MN 55904) 2nd Monday (THROUGH 5/9/2016): 11 a.m. 3p.m. 4th Tuesday (THROUGH 5/9/2016): 11 a.m. 3p.m. Planned Parenthood (Walk-in service: 1212 7th St NW, Rochester, MN 55901) Mondays: 1:00 p.m. 4:00 p.m.

Salvation Army Lunch Program (Walk-in service: 20 1st Ave NE, Rochester, MN 55906) Thursdays: 11:30 a.m. 1 p.m. Visit www.

MNsure.org for info about all state health insurance programs, including those for low-income residents, and special enrollment options for life changes (or call 1-855-3667873) PLEASE BRING: SOCIAL SECURITY NUMBER AND ANY IMMIGRATION DOCUMENTS FOR ALL APPLICANTS; BIRTHDATES OF ALL IN HOUSEHOLD DETAILS ABOUT ALL TYPES OF HOUSEHOLD INCOME EXPECTED IN 2015 INFORMATION ABOUT ALL OTHER HEALTH INSURANCE, including any employer sponsored insurance available to the applicants, even if they didnt enroll in it (Recent pay stubs, W-2 forms, and tax returns are helpful!) For more information and questions, please call the

flOOring

Health Access Rochester MN Office: 507-589-8649.

Minnesota State Hockey: 9-Jan, 7:00 PM, Verizon Wireless Center Mankato MN, 1 Civic Center Plaza, Mankato, See Website. vs. Northern Michigan. (507) 387-8443 The 411 Concert Series presents The Pines: 9-Jan, 7:30 PM, Northfield Arts Guild Theater, 411 W. Third Street, Northfield, $25 . Iowa-born/Minneapolis-based folk rock artists the The Pines have created a loyal following for their lush, layered sound and poetic lyrics inspired by the land and folklore of the American Midwest. Bridging the folk, roots and indie worlds with their modern take on American music, frontmen/songwriters Benson Ramsey and David Huckfelt share a common musical language rooted in the songs and songwriters of their native Iowa, while each bringing a distinct voice and sensibility to a sound that Rolling Stone’s David Fricke dubbed ‘quietly gripping.’

The Pines’ sound balance Ramsey’s ethereal, somberly beautiful songs with Huckfelt’s darkly romantic, cinematic tales for a sweeping sound that evokes the vastness and loneliness of the Great Plains. Their instrumentation blends traditional acoustic instruments with electric guitars, bass and drums. The intricate guitar interplay between Benson and David is layered over the atmospheric keyboard work and vocal harmonies of Alex Ramsey (Benson’s brother) to form the core of The Pines’ instantly recognizable sound.

‘Tribute to John Denver’ by Layne Yost: 9-Jan, 7:30 PM, Crossings at Carnegie, 320 East Avenue, Zumbrota, $15-$18. Layne Yost pays faithful tribute to the timeless, still-popular music of John Denver. Jon Shimoda plays bass to accompany Yosts pure vocals and guitar playing in this homage to the music and the man.

They capture the simple soul of Denver’s music. Woven within the music are stories that give insight into Denver’s life and legacy. Denver is best known for songs like, Take Me Home, Country Roads, Annies

Song, Sunshine on My Shoulders, and Thank God Im a Country Boy.. .

(507) 732-7616

January 10-16: UMR Connects: 12-Jan, 7:00 PM, University of MN Rochester, 4th Floor, 111 S. Broadway, Rochester, Free. Fitness and health go hand in hand - and fitness at any age is possible. What is ‘fitness’? It has been defined as ‘having enough physical strength and energy to do the things you need to do each day and, when you’re finished, to have the strength and energy to do what you like to do! This presentation will look at what it takes to be ‘fit’ at any age and what can be done to maintain fitness for the ages (for life).

The Minneapolis Guitar Quartet: 15-Jan, 7:30 PM, Mayo Civic Center Presentation Hall, 30 Civic Center Drive SE, Rochester, $25 . Come and enjoy an awesome concert!

Scottish Folk: 15-Jan, 7:30 PM, Crossings, 320 East Ave, Zumbrota, $18-$20. Alan Reid and Rob van Sante, formerly of Battlefield Band, present a lively show rooted largely in the music of Scotland, its rich and varied history and landscape providing much of the inspiration for their material.

Dammen Nordic Ski Race: 16-Jan, 8:00 AM, Jay C. Hormel Nature Center, 1304 21st Street Northeast, Austin, $18 . Challenge yourself with an exciting race on the Nature Center’s scenic, beautifullygroomed trails. Pre-registration by January 8 2016 is $15 for adults and $5 for kids (age 13 and below).

After January 8, registration is $18 for adults and $8 for kids. Only $5 extra to do both the classical and freestyle races. Registration forms and more information at www.hormelnaturecenter.org/ski-race. Skis available to rent for any participant who needs them. Profits from this go to the Kevin Dammen Memorial Mentorship Fund. For more information, call 507-437-7519 or email info@hormelnaturecenter.org.

Fat Tire Bike Event: 16-Jan,

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realizing yOur viSiOn ShOuld be nOthing ShOrt Of fabulOuS nelSOndecOratingcenter.cOM 28 w w w. s o u t h e r N m I N n SCENE. c o m | J A N U A R Y 2 0 1 6

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507-451-3710 121 Oakdale St OwatOnna, Mn A d d y o u r e v e n t f o r F R E E t o t h e T I M E L I N E c a l e n d a r . G O TO w w w. s o u t h ernminn . c o m / s c ene / c a len d a r & C l i c k + A d d a n E v ent

10:00 AM, River Bend Nature Center, 1000 Rustad Road, Faribault, $0-$40. Cost based on level of participation.. River Bend is hosting its second Fat Tire Bike Event. The Fat Tire Bike event is a family friendly event providing a chance to experience riding a fat tire bike on River Bend Trails.

There will be smores, hot chocolate, and bring your own sled for our sledding hill. In addition to the 7 miles of trails groomed for both skiing and fat tire biking River Bend volunteers will groom an additional 3 miles of trails for fat tire biking. There will be fat tire bike tours every 90 minutes led by fat tire experts from our sponsors.

Tours will include biking on some or the best trails at River Bend, a brief history of the grounds and scenic views. Biking experts will fit you to a demo fat tire bike and teach you how to ride it for the tour. Also there will be a guest endurance/adventure fat tire bike guest speaker presenting throughout the day. Also be sure to stop in to visit vendor booths including Toms Downtown Bicycles, 45 North, and Milltown Cycles. New this year River Bend is partnering with Cannon River Off-road Cycling and Trials (CROCT) for fundraising event of a River Bend Snow Crush fat tire bike race. The race loop is five miles long and the exact route will be determined based on conditions the day of the race. There will be two classes of race for the different skill levels.

Winners of the race will receive a prize!

Candlelight Snowshoe: 16-Jan, 5:00 PM, Eagle Bluff Environmental Learning Center, 28097 Goodview Dr, Lanesboro, $10 . Stroll along a lighted trail on a beautiful winter evening. Gaze at the stars, listen to the wind over prairie, explore the nighttime woods then stop by a campfire to warm up. Snowshoes provided.

An illuminated hike will take place in case of no snow. Reservations required. Register online at eaglebluff.org on our events page or call 507-467-2437.

January 17-23: Alzheimer’s & Memory Loss Support Group Meeting: 19-Jan, 6:30 PM, Kingsway Retirement Living, 815 W Main St., Belle Plaine, Free. Third Tuesday of every month, at Kingsway Retirement Living, located on the campus of the Lutheran Home of Belle Plaine. For more information call Sarah at (952) 873-2161.

Senior Exercise Class: 19-Jan, 8:00 AM, Bethel Lutheran Church, 810 Third Ave SE, Rochester, Free. Looking for an exercise program that is low-impact and includes gentle range-of-motion exercises that are suitable for every fitness level?

Then join us at Bethel Lutheran Church for our Senior Exercise Class every Tuesday and Thursday starting January 19, 2016 from 8:00-8:40 a.m. This program is free of charge and open to all!

We provide all the equipment, you just have to show up!

Community Car Seat Check: 20-Jan, 4:00 PM, Rochester Fire Station #2, 2185 Wheelock Drive NE, Rochester, Free. Ensure that children are traveling safe in the vehicle by attending a free car seat inspection clinic. Certified child passenger safety technicians will be on-site to assist with the correct and safe installation of car seats and booster seats. Appointments are required and space is limited. The child must be present to properly fit them to their car seat. Contact the Mayo Clinic Trauma Department to schedule an appointment 507-255-5066; Lombard.kimberly@mayo.edu.

Minnesota State Hockey: 22-Jan, 7:00 PM, Verizon Wireless Center Mankato MN, 1 Civic Center Plaza, Mankato, See Website. vs. Lake Superior State.

(507) 387-8443 MNSure Enrollment Events: 22-Jan, 9:00 AM, Rochester, MN, , Rochester, MN, Free.

Open enrollment is November 1, 2015-January 31, 2016. Get FREE hands-on help from a MNsure certified navigator. Below is the

schedule for Rochester, MN events! Olmsted County Family Support & Assistance (Walk-in service: 2117 Campus Dr SE, Suite 100, Rochester, MN 55904) M-F: 9 a.m. 12 p.m. AND 1 p.m. 4 p.m. RCTC/University Center Rochester (when classes in session) (Walk-in service: Student Health Services, HS140, 851 30th Ave SE, Rochester, MN 55904) 2nd Monday (THROUGH 5/9/2016): 11 a.m. 3p.m. 4th Tuesday (THROUGH 5/9/2016): 11 a.m. 3p.m. Planned Parenthood (Walk-in service: 1212 7th St NW, Rochester, MN 55901) Mondays: 1:00 p.m. 4:00 p.m.

Salvation Army Lunch Program (Walk-in service: 20 1st Ave NE, Rochester, MN 55906) Thursdays: 11:30 a.m. 1 p.m. Visit www.

MNsure.org for info about all state health insurance programs, including those for low-income residents, and special enrollment options for life changes (or call 1-855-366-7873) PLEASE BRING: SOCIAL SECURITY NUMBER AND ANY IMMIGRATION DOCUMENTS FOR ALL APPLICANTS; BIRTHDATES OF ALL IN HOUSEHOLD DETAILS ABOUT ALL TYPES OF HOUSEHOLD INCOME EXPECTED IN 2015 INFORMATION ABOUT ALL OTHER HEALTH INSURANCE, including any employer sponsored insurance available to the applicants, even if they didnt enroll in it (Recent pay stubs, W-2 forms, and tax returns are helpful!) For more information and questions, please call the Health Access Rochester MN Office: 507-589-8649.

Accordion-O-Rama: 22-Jan, 7:30 PM, Crossings, 320 East Ave, Zumbrota, $18-$20. An annual event that never fails to delight sell-out audiences, Accordion-O-Rama returns. This years performers are Dan Daddy Squeeze Newton, McKnight winner Dee Langley and Cormac O’Se. Theyll perform in round robin and together.

Minnesota State Hockey: 23-Jan, 7:00 PM, Verizon Wireless Center Mankato MN, 1 Civic Center Plaza, Mankato, See

Website. vs. Lake Superior State.

(507) 387-8443 Rochester Public Library Enrollment Assistance: 23Jan, 9:30 AM, Rochester Public Library, 101 SE 2nd Street, Rochester, Free. Certified navigator available for walk-in assistance using MNsure.org What to bring to help complete your application: - Social security number for each person applying - Date of birth for everyone in household - For non-citizens, Green Card or other immigration documents for each person applying - Most recent pay stubs (for last 30 days) for all employed household members Detailed information/documents for all other sources of income (social security, unemployment, self-employment, year-to-date income from previous jobs, all other income.) - Most recent year’s tax form (1040EZ or Page 1 of 1040) and W2 form(s) are helpful - Employer’s address and contact information - Information about all other health insurance, including any employer-provided health insurance available to each person applying, even if they didn’t enroll in it--if your employer offers health coverage to you, please have them complete this form and bring it with you to the library Languages Available: English Type of Assisters Available: Navigator Event Address: Rochester Public Library 101 2nd Street SE Second Floor - Computer lab at top of stairs Rochester, MN 55904.

Comedy Hypnosis Show!: 23-Jan, 7:30 PM, State Theater, 96 E 4th St, Zumbrota, $8-$14.

The Zumbrota State Theatre will be jumping with fun, laughter and excitement as Master Hypnotist David Danzig electrifies the audience with his hilarious Comedy Hypnosis Show! Volunteers will undergo a complete transformation, and the pandemonium is all great fun.

January 24-31: My Heart In My Hands: 24-

Jan, 10:00 AM, St. Olaf CollegeDittmann Center, 1520 St. Olaf Avenue, Northfield, Free. St. Olaf College’s Flaten Art Museum is hosting an exhibition titled My Heart in My Hands: Ron Gallas and Friends. This exhibition will be on display beginning November 20th through January 24th.

A Non-techies Guide To Marketing Technology: 27Jan, 8:00 AM, Media Relations, Inc., 350 W Burnsville Pkwy, Burnsville, Free. The tool set for communicating with your customers has changed for the better.

Social media plays a large role in customer service, sales, and marketing and it is growing faster than any promotional channel ever has in the past. This growth has created a need for businesses to connect and align their blogs, sales funnels and email marketing efforts to their Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn and YouTube accounts.

It is important to define your messages, target market and goals; however, more important than the tactics and promotional channels that carry your messages is the strategy behind the messages.

When information gets cloudy, people tend to focus on things that remain consistent the consistency with what you do, who you serve, and how you connect with them. Schedule: 8:00 a.m.

Registration & Networking 8:30 a.m. Presentation.

A Non-techies Guide To Marketing Technology: 27-Jan, 8:00 AM, Media Relations, Inc., 350 W. Burnsville Pkwy, Suite 350, Burnsville, Free. The tool set for communicating with your customers has changed for the better.

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exhibitors featuring the latest tactics and promotional channels home improvement products that carry your messages is the strategy behind the messages. and services to get your home When information gets cloudy, renovation projects off to the right people tend to focus on things start. Talk with the experts and get that remain consistent the confree tips and ideas! Meet buildsistency with what you do, who ers, remodelers, landscapers, you serve, and how you connect designers, painters, architects, with them. Schedule: 8:00 a.m. interior designers and more. Main Registration & Networking 8:30 Stage filled with on-going speaker a.m. Presentation. presentations, demonstrations The Complete Works of and entertainment all day long.

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Adults $18, children under 12 com or call (952)238-1700. $10. William Shakespeare meets E Street Shuffle/Detroit Monty Python as this turly hysMuscle, Presented By Mick terical comedy takes a blowtorch Sterling: 30-Jan, 7:30 PM, State to the academic fustiness that Theater, 96 E 4th St, Zumbrota, has accumulated aoround the $28-$32. The thematic songs of Bard’s work. Titus Andronicus as RocknRoll Hall of Fame recipients a cooking show, Othello as a rap Bruce Springsteen and Bob Seger song, etc. Hamlet in 5 seconds, as have provided a memorable well as Hamlet backwards in 42 soundtrack for anyone with a seconds! All performed by three car radio or record player. The actors in 90 minutes! combination of the songs of these Berlin in the Baroque: two iconic artists in one night 29-Jan, 7:30 PM, Zumbro will be quite frankly, unstoppable!

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CD REVIEWS

By Sarah Osterbauer editor@southernminnscene.com

A

Adam Levy’s raw, bare bones ‘Naubinway’

dam Levy, best known for his starring role in the beloved Twin Cities band The Honeydogs released his first album of solo material, Naubinway last month. The album was released by Think Piece Publishing, which is more of a mental health awareness and advocacy company than a record label. It was an obvious partner for Levy as Naubinway chronicles the painful experience of losing his son Daniel to suicide in 2012. As suicide and mental health have taken a huge toll on the local music community this year, the music will certainly touch the minds and hearts of anyone affected by it. Levy’s lyrics speak plainly and directly regarding this grief and suffering. The raw bare bones-ness of the songs allows the full weight of the lyrics to come through.

On “Take It As It Comes” Levy’s five o’clock shadow level gruffness reminds us and himself that the process of grieving is day by day. He sings “take it as it comes, I can’t get out of this space” like a light pep talk to himself to accept his grief, to move into it and through it as his soul wills it. He calls out the humanness of people’s adversity to mental illness when he says we “run

By RICH LARSON editor@southernminnscene.com

J

Everybody does indeed have a mountain

ake Ilika is an unsung hero.

He’s one of the hardest working people in the Minnesota music scene. He’s a solo artist, one half of the Ilika Ward duo (with partner Joel Ward), and a part-time fill in with the Minneapolis classic rock outfit The 4onthefloor. Every time I turn around it seems like there’s another Jake Ilika project out there.

His versatility as a musician is his greatest strength, and nowhere has that been more on display than it is on the new album from his band The Heavy Set, Everybody’s Got A Mountain.

Working with guitarist Jim Trouten, bass player Jamie Groth, and drummer Zac Barbieur, Ilika has found a group of musicians willing to go where his muse takes him. With their second release, following up their 2014 eponymous debut EP, the band stretches out, exploring empty space and filling those spaces with everything from a sound collage to a smoking slide solo. Like a man brooding over every misstep and mistake, Ilika allows his music, and the rest of the band with help from producer Erik Koskinen, to take him in both dreamy and powerful directions.

The Heavy Set is a rock band, of this there is no question, but Ilika is not a guy to write the standard 1-4-5 chord progression in 4/4 time.

He writes rock songs that can have writers tied in

By RICH LARSON editor@southernminnscene.com

T

Dan Israel explores the human side of heartbreak

his is a horrible thing to say, and I apologize to all of the aggrieved parties up front, but I really look forward to break-up/divorce albums from great songwriters. Some of the best albums of the past forty years, Lyle Lovett’s The Road to Ensenada, Adele’s 21, Bruce Springsteen’s Tunnel of Love, Phil Collins’ Face Value and, of course, the mother of them all, Bob Dylan’s Blood on the Tracks are all albums created in the wake of heartbreak and lost love.

I’m not someone who believes one must live the blues to play the blues, but I do believe it sure as hell helps. When a great artist is feeling emotionally raw, it can make for amazing art. I certainly do not wish divorce on anybody, but I will admit that the Break-Up album is one of my favorite sub-genres.

Which brings me to the recent release from longtime Twin Cities singer/songwriter Dan Israel, simply titled Dan. This is a divorce album, but it’s unlike any I’ve ever heard before. Israel is careful to construct this album the way a lot of Minnesota handle divorce – they put up a good front, but in the end, there’s no way to hide a broken heart.

The first song on the album, “Winter is Coming,” is a prelude. He’s telling us, “look, I’m in a bad way, and I’m going to do my best not to dump it all on you, but I need to process this.”

32 w w w. s o u t h e r N m I N n SCENE. c o m | J A N U A R Y 2 0 1 6

like hell from the things we don’t understand.”

The cracks and spaces in his voice give the lyrics their legs and make them stand.

“How I let You Down” bluntly and directly describes the grieving process with Levy singing to his son, “we’re still learning how to be without you.” He touches on the struggle his family went through trying to help Daniel with his ongoing depression - “We threw you so many lifelines, you burned them to the quick”. Levy is candid and open as he describes the reflection period of trying to understand why this tragedy happened.

He does what we all do, recounting past events, asking if he did everything he could to prevent it.. His unflinching depiction lights a candle on the path to take away the stigma of suicide and mental illness.

The album culminates in “Naubinway”, named for the place where Levy and his family spread Daniel’s ashes. The song details their actions and Adam’s release of his child in “a backwards baptism on Lake Michigan”. It’s a heartbreaker that Levy has said in an interview with MPR that he will not play live. The reason not because he doesn’t think he could get through it, but because he wants to be sensitive to the folks listening and realizes what kind of effect it might

knots over how to explain the sound. It’s not fair to say The Heavy Set sounds like Pink Floyd meets The Smiths in Seattle, but it’s far less useful to just say the music on Everybody’s Got A Mountain plays out like a restless nights sleep. It’s warm and comfortable, but laced with tension and worry.

“Just Like A Ghost” is a deep meandering piece with trippy, multi-tracked vocals and a clean, powerful guitar solo. Baurbier’s drums are a rock solid foundation upon which Ilika’s and Trouten’s guitars build a sand castle adorned with a gorgeous, distant piano line. “Getting’ Tired” takes a heavy bass line, and wraps fat telecaster chords around it, while Ilika’s processed voice sings a sweet blues. “Chance to Change,” the album opener, might feature the most straight ahead arrangement, built on the direction of a rhythmic electric piano line. The music on this album may defy simple explanation, but there is no doubt that it is smart, well crafted, mature and sophisticated. While completely accessible, the layers seem to go on endlessly. This is a thinking person’s rock album.

The best moment on this album is “Eagles on the Ice.” The tale of finding strength on a shifting, slippery foundation is a landmark moment for Ilika as a songwriter. He hits all the right spots.

The quietly brushed railroad beat, underpins his yearning for stability and the comforts of home.

“There’s a bar not too far from where us workers stay/Once or twice with my guitar, I’ll sit down

In his best “what can you do?” tone he sings “It ain’t what you bought/But what choice have you got/But to make your peace with the change.”

The melody and chord progression are simple and matter of fact; not a blue note to be found.

That is followed by “Be With Me.” “If you don’t wanna be with me/you don’t gotta be with me,” he sings in a rather upbeat, still simple melody. He’s putting the best face he can on acceptance. There’s something to be respected about it. Our man Dan is being brave.

The album continues like that. “Can’t believe it” is built on a power chord riff, and while the lyrics are not exactly overly positive “I can’t believe it/The worst case has come true/You really needed/To find your own way, too,” it’s tough to hang your head amidst all those major chords and a heroic guitar solo. “Two Bright Stars” celebrates the resiliency of his kids and how he knows they will come through this thing all right.

By and large, Israel is selling it. Yeah, it’s obvious that all of this really sucks, but he seems to have a positive outlook on things.

And then we come to “You Don’t Love Me Anymore,” where his brave façade starts showing a few cracks. We start to see a little bit of anger over wasted time and wasted energy. Again, the melody is strong, and a nifty little Hammond organ line weaves through the verses holding everything together. There’s not one but two solid

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have on them. That shows what kind of person Adam is, conscious of the weight of his music and the painfulness of it all.

Naubinway is a sad album whose sound is not sad. Many of the songs move at a trot or a canter and the guitar picking shines the way a butterfly dances in light. It almost seems trivial to discuss the music elements of the songs because the content is so heavy and so important. You can hear acceptance of the struggle, the pain and the grief. Adam told MPR, “Life goes on in spite of great tragedy, so here I am.” And that is a great summation of the feeling of Naubinway.

When something terrible happens in this life it is natural to want to hit the pause button. But even if we choose to stand still in reflection of terrible things, everything else continues to move. At some point, you have to get back on and move with it. Listening to Levy’s journey through that process is a beautiful privilege and we should be grateful he was brave enough to share it.

Sarah Osterbauer is the SouthernMinn Scene music columnist.

She’s a music critic and loves to meet the people who make the city’s heart beat (and sometimes break). Follow her on twitter @ SarahOwrites.

and I’ll play/Songs about the ocean blue/And songs of dreams that won’t come true/And songs that make me think of you.” Eventually the lithe, pretty melody gives way to an explosive coda, featuring one hell of a fiddle solo supplied by the fabulous Jillian Rae. It’s one of those songs that makes you hit the repeat button when it’s over.

Throughout Everybody’s Got A Mountain, Ilika’s lyrics focus on themes of loss and frustration. “Chance to Change” is built around the phrase “If you’d give me half a chance to change I would.” On Circling the Drain he sings “All my nights are sleepless/All my days so long and plain/While you spent the whole summer dancing in the rain/I spent mine circling the drain.” While the words are plaintive and blunt, his delivery is matter-of-fact. This is not a man wallowing in despair. He’s a guy looking for a way out of the darkness, and is using every tool at his disposal to find it.

In the end, this album is all about overcoming those huge pits and obstacles in life. Ilika uses his guitar, his songs and his compatriots to sort through the rough roads and poorly drawn maps we are left with in this life. He’s right. Everybody does indeed have a mountain. The grace and skill he uses to get over this one is nothing short of inspiring.

Rich Larson is the publisher and editor of SouthernMinn Scene. You can reach him at rlarson@southernminnscene.com.

guitar solos, but the second comes after a moment of discouragement “I followed that rainbow to the ground/A pot of gold I never found.” That is followed by this punch line: “It’s clearer with the passing time/Nothing’s gonna change your mind/We had so much left to share/but I won’t try if you don’t care.”

He follows that with the appropriately titled “Moving Day,” and attempts to rally a little with “Winning at Solitaire.” But in the end, he’s only left with himself. “You’re going to be alright,’ he sings to himself, “Or so you’ve been told.” “Looking back at memories/The family skipping stones/ Could cry until I’m weary/It’s off to the unknown/ Once she was your one girl/But now you’re on your own.”

With Dan, Israel has put together a remarkable piece of work, not because of its strength, not because of its understated anguish, or the power of its vitriol. This is an amazing album because it’s so damn human. He’s down; he’s hurting. He’s going to be okay eventually, but for now man, he’s trying. He’s trying.

You want to throw your arm around him, buy him a beer and just let him know that he doesn’t have to put up that stiff upper lip. It’s impossible anyway.

Thanks for sharing, Dan. Hang in there.

Rich Larson is the publisher and editor of SouthernMinn Scene. You can reach him at rlarson@southernminnscene.com.

A d d y o u r e v e n t f o r F R E E t o t h e T I M E L I N E c a l e n d a r . G O TO w w w. s o u t h ernminn . c o m / s c ene / c a len d a r & C l i c k + A d d a n E v ent

CD REVIEWS

By Daniel G. Moir editor@southernminnscene.com

W

Adele’s big let down

e live in the age of hype. Anticipation rides high these days, from the new Star Wars movie to the new Cinnamon Bunflavored Oreo. Adele’s album is no exception.

Prior to the release of 25, several music writers attached epithets like “the one to save the music industry” to the record. Tightly guarded secrecy only added to the hype. When the last minute decision was made to restrict the album from streaming services like Spotify and Apple Music it threw down a gauntlet. Surely, it must be mindblowing.

Well, like most overly anticipated things…

If Adele Adkins first album, 19 was a pleasantly moderate introduction from a promising British singer/songwriter, her second album 21 was jaw-dropping. It revealed an unexpectedly bold, soulful voice with tremendous emotional power delivering songs filled with heartbreak. It deserved every accolade and Grammy it earned.

Unfortunately, it would seem that it also gave Adele a formula. With 25, Adele falls into the age-old rut that has befallen many a new superstar. With it, she offers a follow-up that is good, but only very slightly different from her previous offering. It is kind of like if Billy Joel released Son of The Stranger or if Radiohead put out Sure, MacIntosh.

The leadoff single, “Hello,” is a disturbing indicator. On the surface, Adele’s rich vocals drip with sadness and regret. But a review of the lyrics is a little unsettling. With a recipient who

“never seems to be home” and a situation that “clearly doesn’t tear them apart anymore,” I get the feeling that not only did the singer initiate the breakup, but now her regret is closer to stalking. For true longing and despair, you only have to look to the closeted Dusty Springfield singing about a love she can never have in tracks like “The Windmills of Your Mind.” Now, that’s heartbreak.

“Send My Love (To Your New Lover)” has an engaging vocal hook with an exuberant vocal and rhythmic bounce but it doesn’t have the same grit and self-assurance as “Rumour Has It” from the previous album.

“Remedy” is a pleasant song with a piano part reminiscent of Marc Cohn’s “Dig Down Deep,” but it lacks the emotional grit and payoff of the former. “Water Under the Bridge” delivers a bright spot on the album with a confident rhythm that breaks into a delightfully hummable melody.

The problem here is that much of the material on 25 feels like overwrought heartbreak, wallowing in misery without delivering an emotional pay-off. “I Miss You,” “When We Were Young” and “Million Years Ago” all fit this mold, but nothing quite as much as the next track.

“All I Ask” is a maudlin “end of the relationship” piano based song in which the singer begs to be “held as more than just a friend” before concluding “what if I never love again?” Hung on a simplistic melody, this is a trite, uninspired, and ultimately, pathetic attempt to grasp at something clearly over. It seems just a forced repeat of what she did SO much better on “Take It All” from 21.

The edition of the album sold at Target contains three additional songs and is the one to pick up. That version closes with “Why Do You Love Me” and is easily the best song on the album.

Driven by a rocking beat and a fluid baseline, this great uplifting rouser is a joyful reminder of what Adele is capable of. It is a criminal act that this sure-fire single is NOT on the regular album. If only the other songs were more like this one…

Here are a couple of things that you can count on with this album: 25 will undoubtedly be the best selling album of 2015 (it sold 3.38 Million copies in the first week, so mission accomplished). It will probably also add to Adele’s warchest of music awards. Next summer, she will tour across the world and millennial-aged girls, in groups of 5 or 6, will pay upwards of $150 apiece at venues like the Xcel to cry their eyes out when she sings these songs of heartbreak. They will remember lost romances, as well as relationships that never happened. This is okay. Every generation needs their “Open Arms” to cry to.

This is not to say that 25 is a bad album, just a disappointing one that pales in comparison to the voice singing on it and the triumph of her previous release. Adele succeeds when she avoids formula and delivers the unexpected. Now, about those Oreos…

Bottom Line: At times engaging, Adele seems willing to attempt to re-create the magic of the past instead of engaging a new partner on her latest release.

Rich Larson is the publisher and editor of SouthernMinn Scene. You can reach him at rlarson@southernminnscene.com.

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KEVIN KREIN

Memories Kevin Krein is an essayist, a writer for two newspapers, an award winning music blogger, a cool rabbit dad, and a bookseller. Follow his controversial hot takes on Twitter: @KevEFly.

made in the

Coldest Winter For S A member of my family passed away very suddenly and very unexpectedly in February. It was on one of those cold days—the cold days that we’d had all winter long. The kind of cold that keeps the air still and makes the whistle of a distant train sound like it is right outside of your home. The kind of cold day where no matter how many layers of clothing you wear, you still feel chilled to the bone. The kind of day where your breath hangs in the air for an eternity before dissipating.

She had been sick, off and on, for a few months leading up to that day—February 22nd, and before that, there had been trips to the doctor on days that were even colder—in January, when winter seems to be at its cruelest. Days when the wind would make the piles of snow dance dangerously and seductively across the highway as you carefully tried to drive through it, making your way back home.

Days when your furnace just never seems to shut off, and you can feel the sub zero air seeping in off of the walls in your home.

Days full of anxiety that lead to dark, endless nights waiting for a sleep that would never come.

I have a problem when I make a memory. It mostly happens with events that have shaped who I’ve become, so unfortunately, it is something that occurs most often with sad, or bad memories. The problem I have is that I associate the memory, or event, very closely with the season with which it took place.

This unexpected passing has obviously been weighing on my mind through all of the year, but it is all the more present now, with the inevitable descent into yet another seemingly ceaseless winter.

2015 was the year I stopped believing in god.

It seems worth mentioning that I was not a very religious, spiritual, or faithful person to begin with and for a number of years, I had dubbed myself an agnostic, rather than an atheist.

I was raised Catholic, which is probably one of the worst things you can do to a person, because it instills in you, from an early age, a fear that everything you do is a complete disappointment to god. As a young child, I said prayers before bedtime, and I can recall asking for the lord’s forgiveness if I “had a bad day.” “Please let me have a better day tomorrow,” I would say, kneeling on the floor by my bed.

And even later in life, after you have come to the conclusion on your own that you do not believe there is any kind of higher power—this fear that everything you do is wrong and disappointing is still nearly impossible to shake, because it is ingrained in almost every fiber of your being.

Because I was raised Catholic, I spent eight of my formative years attending Catholic school, where we had was commonly referred to as “religion class.” As I got older, in high school, it became more interesting as we learned about the history of the Catholic church— literally from its inception to the present day, taught to by an eccentric and possibly former alcoholic priest who used to smoke in his car between classes and talk about Quentin Tarantino movies with me and the other boys in my grade.

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However, in 7th grade, we had religion class with Mr. Romes—who had breath that smelled like fish, who loudly breathed through his nose. Old Mr. Romes, with his coarse, graying hair, unkempt and combed over the top of his enormous, round head.

I don’t remember anything Mr. Romes may have tried to teach us, but I remember an anecdote he relayed to the class.

The conceit of it was about always keeping god with you at all times, not just when you need him (for Catholics, god is male.) The anecdote was about how his wife was not a very spiritual person, and once, a number of years in the past, they were almost in some kind of horrific car accident. As the danger seemed almost impossible to escape, she apparently screamed, “God save us.”

And it worked—at the very last second, they were somehow, miraculously fine.

Keeping god in a box is what he called it.

at the time (who was moderately religious/faithful)1 suggested that maybe I’d feel better if I started going to church—an idea that I distinctly remember scoffing at. I think I self-identified for so long as an agnostic, or a “lapsed Catholic” for so many years because I had no interest in religion; I simply just did not care.

Boy time sure flies when you’re reading....The Bible??!! Ewww...

A hilarious thing that comes up when you Google search “atheist.”

To some extent, I think many people keep god in a box—only asking for help when a situation has seemingly reached its absolute most dire, and you have nowhere else to turn. I know I have—turning to god for help with something that I couldn’t immediately mend on my own, or felt out of my control—closing my eyes tightly and clasping my hands together like you are supposed to do, saying “please let this be okay.”

But not everything turns out okay. Prayers can, seemingly, go unanswered or unnoticed. Or perhaps they never reached that final destination—catching the ear of some kind of omnipotent being who has the power to intervene divinely. Maybe there is no ear for those prayers to catch. They are just words; words you say within your mind or whisper under your breath. And that’s exactly where they stay.

Many, many years ago, when I was going through what can be looked back on now as a laughably tame depression (in comparison to the depths I have come to understand as an adult) the girl I was involved with

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What makes someone, and more importantly, keeps someone religious, spiritual, or faithful? What turns a non-believer, or the unfaithful, in the opposite direction?

And what causes someone who has never taken any strong stance, one way or the other, to decry?

It’s because in the unforgiving, bitter cold, in the face of an incomprehensible loss, two ideals present themselves. And when you are holding on to the lifeless body of a loved one, sobbing uncontrollably and wondering why this has happened—in that blurry, confusing moment when nothing makes sense, when you finally come to, only one of those ideals seems like the logical thing to accept.

I know that there are people out there who would still choose to believe in the wake of something like the death of a loved one—they would simply say that “god is testing them,” or they would say, “god only throws at you what you can handle.” Maybe, on the other end, they would come out even more faithful than they were before.

In a way, maybe I am partially envious of those who have a strong spiritual belief, because they always have that; it is apparently always there with them, to get them through their darkest moments.

And all that I am left with are the memories I made in the coldest winter.

1 - An anecdote: during a summer we were going to be spending apart, this girl suggested we read the same book, and then discuss aspects of it on the phone in the evening. I said sure, what book did you have in mind. She suggested The Bible, and without missing a beat, my response to her was simply, “Can’t we read a good book?” We parted ways roughly two months later.

A d d y o u r e v e n t f o r F R E E t o t h e T I M E L I N E c a l e n d a r . G O TO w w w. s o u t h ernminn . c o m / s c ene / c a len d a r & C l i c k + A d d a n E v ent

Owatonna 2016

Bridal Fair Sunday, January 17 10 AM - 3 PM

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Holiday Inn Hotel & Suites Interstate 35, Exit 45, Owatonna

CAKE DIVE 2:30 PM

Grand Prize Packages Only engaged couples are eligible to register for Cake Dive & Grand Prize Packages.

Package One Banquet Hall Rental ($1700 value) One Year Unlimited Tanning Package Donated by: Holiday Inn Hotel & Suites, & Haute Tanning Total Package Value $2700

Package Two Banquet Hall Rental ($1600 value) Gift Certificate towards purchase of a Wedding Gown Donated by: Owatonna Country Club & Dream Day Bridals by Marcia Total Package Value $2100

Photo by Justina Louise Photography

Participating Vendors (As of 12-11-15)

Advocare AmericInn Hotel & Suites Bella Vita Salon Blooming Prairie Servicemen’s Club Blooms of Love Bluebird Cakery Camp Pillsbury Cedar Travel Complete Music Completely Kids & Maternity Custom Remodelers

Dream Day Bridal by Marica Owatonna Elks Lodge Encore Events Fareway Foods Floral Designs by Jodi Haute Tanning & Skin Spa HD Wedding Photography Hemingway Photography Holiday Inn & Suites Hy-Vee Images 4 Life Images by Gabrielle

Inspired Design Legacy Golf Lilla Rose Mary Kay Midwest Sound Monterey Ballroom Oak View Nursery Owatonna Country Club Paffrath Jewelers Perfect Day Cakes Selfies to Go Photobooth Shot in the Dark

Sponsored by:

Sisters Salon & Day Spa Southern Heights Dental Stargazer Designs Steel the Moment Photography Steele Co. Historical Society Sugar Mama Bakery The Hideaway The Inn at Shattuck St. Mary’s The Travel Concierge Torey’s Restaurant & Bar Travel Headquarters VFW Auxiliary Post 3723 Weddings By Deb

Owatonna.com

135 W. Pearl | Owatonna | 507.444.2389 A d d y o u r e v e n t f o r F R E E t o t h e T I M E L I N E c a l e n d a r . G O TO w w w. s o u t h ernminn . c o m / s c ene / c a len d a r & C l i c k + A d d a n E v ent

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| JANUARY 2016

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Gallery Exhibitions

January Thaw, Featuring Buddy Koopmans Orchestra

Runs January 8-February 20 Free to the Public Part of the 2016 KDHL/Power 96 Gallery Season Opening and Artist Reception: January 8, 5-7pm

January 23, 7:30pm $15 Members // $20 Non-Members // $10 Students $5 Student Rush: Available 15 minutes before curtain time, cash only with valid student I.D.

Carlander Family Gallery: Lois Vranesh Boardroom: Corey Lyn Creger Gallery:

Direct from Northfield, and the Wabasha Caves in the Twin Cities, the Buddy Koopmans Orchestra will thaw out the coldest winter sufferer.

Wendy Smith Kelly Schamberger Henry Peters

The Merlin Players Present

Mary Jane Alm

The Complete Works of William Shakespeare, Abridged

January 8, 7:30pm $17 Members // $22 Non-Members // $10 Students $5 Student Rush: Available 15 minutes before curtain time, cash only with valid student I.D. Part of the 2016 KGP Companies Music Series Winner of the Minnesota Music Awards’ Best Female Vocalist (multiple years) and Artist of the Year, Mary Jane Alm brings her brand of musical magic to the Paradise, covering styles from blues to rock and everything in between.

“Of all Twin Cities performers, no one is more adored than Mary Jane Alm, a talented charmer with golden vocal chords, disarming sincerity, an impressive collection of original tunes and a hot, high-caliber band.”

- St. Paul Pioneer Press

Written by Adam Long, Daniel Singer, and Jess Winfield Directed by Julianna Skluzacek January 29, 30, February 4, 5, 6, 7:30pm January 31, 2pm $15 Adults // $9 Students 12 and Under

Pastels

January 11, 4-6pm $14 Members // $18 Non-Members $7 Supply Fee Instructed by Barb Bruns Ages 12 and Up

Duke Otherwise

Explore the medium of Pastels! Learn application, blending and layering, and under painting with pastels.

January 16, 2pm $12 Members // $15 Non-Members // $8 Students

SAVE THESE SUMMER DATES!

Using his clever songs and unique showmanship, Duke Otherwise effortlessly engages and inspires children (and adults) of all ages. From Madison, Wisconsin, he has been entertaining for many years with his guitar, tap shoes and distinct singing voice. His original songs will make you laugh, clap, dance and interact.

These activities are made possible through a grant from the Southeastern Minnesota Arts Council, thanks to legislative appropriation from the arts and cultural heritage fund.

Community Iron Pour and Scratch Tile Workshop June 11 and 18

Raku Workshop

June 11 or June 28 or July 9 and Firing July 16

Plein Air at Central Park

August 18

These activities are made possible by the voters of Minnesota through a Minnesota State Arts Board Operating Support grant, thanks to a legislative appropriation from the arts and cultural heritage fund.

ParadiseCenterForTheArts.org Note: Ticket processing fee added at purchase.

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