May 2020

VOLUME 37, #3 MAY 2020

FREE!

Dealing With Travel Chaos

A Like No Other INSIDE:

YES, Plan for

SUMMER CAMP!

Family RESOURCE Guide - Pull Out and Save!

2 WNY Family May 2020

May 2020 • Volume 37 • Issue 3

EDITOR & PUBLISHER Michele Miller GENERAL MANAGER Paul Kline SALES REPRESENTATIVES Jennifer Staebell Paul Kline GRAPHIC DESIGNERS Karen Wawszczyk Melanie Schroeder CONTRIBUTORS Barbara Blackburn • Donna Phillips Patrick Hempfing • Deborah Williams Kathy Lundquist • Myrna Beth Haskell Mike Daugherty

/WNYFamily

/WNYFamily

Where It’s At! Happy Mother’s Day Features: 6n

A Mother’s Day Like No Other

by Michele Miller

8n

How Motherhood Made Me Appreciate My Mom

by Sarah Lyons

10 n

The One Accessory Every Mother Needs

by Christa Melnyk Hines

11 n

To My Teenage Son: What I Want For Mother’s Day

by Katy M. Clark

/WNYFamily

Visit Our Web Site www.wnyfamilymagazine.com To Reach Us: Advertising Department advertising@wnyfamilymagazine.com Calendar Submissions calendar@wnyfamilymagazine.com Subscriptions subscriptions@wnyfamilymagazine.com Editorial Submissions michele@wnyfamilymagazine.com MAILING ADDRESS: 3147 Delaware Ave., Suite B Buffalo, NY 14217 Phone: (716) 836-3486 • Fax: (716) 836-3680 PRINTED BY: Commercial Printing Division The Post-Journal, Jamestown WE ARE AN AUDITED PUBLICATION CIRCULATION (copies printed): 20,000 © 2020 Western New York Family, Inc. All rights reserved. Reproduction in any form without permission is strictly prohibited. Inclusion of an advertisement does not constitute an endorsement by the publisher.

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FAMILY RESOURCE GUIDE

A Special Pull-Out Section 19 n

53 n

Why Smart Parents Never Say These 8 Things

by Pam Moore

Directories:

14 n Summer Camps 55 n Let’s Party

Regulars: 5 n Web Finds / What’s New In The Kid Biz 12 n Family Travel Travel Chaos!

by Deborah Williams 39 n Parent Previews The Call of the Wild

by Kirsten Hawkes 40 n Raising Digital Kids Looking for an Escape

by Mike Daugherty 42 n Pick of the Literature

by Dr. Donna Phillips 44 n Dad & Daughter Discussions Living Vicariously

by Patrick & J.L. Hempfing 46 n Dear Teacher

by Peggy Gisler & Marge Eberts 48 n Special Needs Apraxia of Speech: Learn to Identify a Difficult Childhood Speech Problem

by Suzanne Koup-Larsen 50 n Tweens and Teens Pomp & Circumstance

by Myrna Beth Haskell 52 n Single Parenting Parenting 2020

by Diane Dierks, LMFT 54 n The Kid Friendly Kitchen Muffins

by Kathy Lundquist 55 n The Kiddie Gourmet Boco Kitchen/Chef’s on the Go

by Barbara Blackburn

You’ll find FREE courtesy copies of WNY Family at all Buffalo area Wegmans and 300 locations including Public Libraries, Doctors’ Offices, Child Care Centers and many of our advertisers.

(Look for us INSIDE Wegmans on the racks where newspapers are sold or at the service desk... but we’re still FREE...Copies are restocked twice a week, but they go fast!)

Find this entire issue online at www.wnyfamilymagazine.com May 2020 WNY Family 3

In times like these

home and family is everything As we cope with the current unexpected changes that have affected our daily routines, take some time to enjoy the good things in life that you wish you could do more often…

SHARE SOME VALUABLE TOGETHER TIME WITH YOUR CHILDREN…

Fly a kite...

Take turns reading aloud...

Start your garden seedlings indoors...

Together we’ll get through this tough time and WNY Family Magazine is here to help!

Due to the extension of the NYS on PAUSE policy, we will not feature a Calendar of Events in this issue. But you can still stay up to date on summer offerings and connect with the businesses you need by checking out our Summer Camps section and Family Resource Guide!

Stay safe, stay healthy!

4 WNY Family May 2020

web.finds Since we’ve all been confined to our homes, with our darling children out of school for weeks and weeks, Mom definitely needs some spa time to revive and refresh herself, even if she has to lock herself in the bathroom to do it! Here are some D.I.Y. recipes, made inexpensively with common ingredients you may already have at home (or may still be able to find on sometimes empty store shelves). Happy Mother’s Day!

EXFOLIATING FACIAL SCRUB

Tracey, over at Don’t Mess with Mama, enjoys sharing tips for natural living made simple.

Check out her recipe for an Exfoliating Facial Scrub for Glowing Skin, which is made from oatmeal and almonds, with optional essential oils. Oatmeal is a mild and soothing exfoliant, while almonds are high in antioxidants and Vitamin E. Just add old-fashioned oats and raw almonds to a coffee grinder, blender, or food processor and finely grind. Place in a clean, dry container.

When ready to use, scoop the powder into the palm of your hand, add enough water to make a soft paste. Spread on your face and massage into the skin for 1-2 minutes. Rinse well with warm water. Details found at: https://dontmesswithmama.com/diy-exfoliating-facial-scrub/

SKIN BRIGHTENER YOGURT & HONEY FACIAL MASK

Jill of OneGoodThing has a friend, Jodi, who is a master esthetician with her own spa. Jodi shared her recipe for this mask which consists of 1 tablespoon plain yogurt, 1 teaspoon honey, dash of ground cinnamon, dash of ground nutmeg.

Mix ingredients in a cup and apply to face. It might tingle a bit at first; that means it’s working. Leave on for 7 to 10 minutes; wash off with warm water. Read about all the benefits of the ingredients at https://www.onegoodthingbyjillee.com/ diy-skin-brightener-yogurt-and-honey-facial-mask/

SUGAR SCRUB FOR SILKY SMOOTH SKIN

Katie Wells, a mom of 6, over at Wellness Mama, knows that a beauty regime doesn’t have to be expensive. Sugar scrubs are simple to make and can be used on your face, body, and feet. Combine 1 cup granulated sugar, ½ cup oil (olive oil or coconut oil) and scented essential oil of your choice (optional). Mix all ingredients and store in an airtight jar. Use 1 tablespoon as needed in the shower. Scrub skin with the mixture and rinse well. Check out recipes for a variety of other scrubs here: https://wellnessmama.com/3628/sugar-scrub/

FOOT SOAK

Also from OneGoodThing, this soak uses 1 cup of Original Listerine (or another YELLOW antiseptic mouthwash), 1 cup vinegar, 2 cups warm water. (Makes 1 quart; you may wish to double or triple recipe. Do NOT use any BLUE or GREEN mouthwashes as they tend to stain the skin.) Add all the ingredients to a small plastic tub, soak your feet for 10-15 minutes, then use a foot file, pumice stone, or even a scrubby sponge to help slough off the softened dead skin. Find details here: https://www.onegoodthingbyjillee.com/listerine-and-vinegar-foot-soak/

What’s New...

IN THE KIDBIZ STAY AT HOME WITH CANDLEWICK PRESS The folks at Candlewick Press know it isn’t easy to parent, work and homeschool — and with that in mind they have created a bookbased, easy-to-navigate resource site to house learning material, activities, podcasts and videos for all ages.

Many of the resource links feature favorite book series, characters and authors — from Kate DiCamillo to Waldo to Judy Moody to the Princess in Black — that kids will instantly know and recognize as residents on their home and school bookshelves.

There is also a free, downloadable, kidfriendly, illustrated e-book about the coronavirus. Candlewick Press partnered with colleagues at Nosy Crow to make this informative and accessible guide widely available.

It explains why everyday routines have been disrupted and lays out how everyone can do their part to help.

You’ll find the book as well as all the activities, videos, educational materials and more at https://stayhome.candlewick.com/

MAKE LEARNING AT HOME EASIER BRAINLY.COM, the world’s largest online learning community with 150 million monthly users, surveyed 1,600 U.S. high school and college students to find out how the coronavirus is impacting them. Nationwide, 40% of students worry their grades will be negatively impacted by school closures or transitions to online classes due to coronavirus. They offer some tips to students who may still be struggling to adapt.

BREAK TIME. Nationwide, 40% of students report that staying focused is the biggest challenge when receiving online instruction. The easiest ways students can ensure they’re able to stay focused when learning from home is taking breaks to recharge their minds. The best way to maximize productivity is by taking SHORT breaks – say 5 to 15 minutes – every hour or so. Then take a longer break – at least 30 minutes – every 2 to 4 hours (depending on your tasks).

NO PAJAMAS. For many students learning from home for the first time, it can be difficult to delineate the start of the school day and ensure they get in the right academic mental space without the physical classroom around them.

One of the best ways to ensure you continue academic routines and success is to actually get up and get dressed for the day as if you were still going to a physical class. Plus, bonus points that you’ll look good for video-conferencing if needed!

May 2020 WNY Family 5

ting the kids up, dressed, fed, and ready to get to school on time, often while making themselves presentable for their own commute to work. Now, Mom may be working at home, trying to find a quiet place to concentrate or have conference calls in between stints as a referee for bouts of boredom among kids afflicted with “cabin fever” long after the usual season for this malady should have been over.

A

s I write this in early April, the stay-at-home order is in effect until the end of the month. I hope by the time you’re reading this in our May issue that the Coronavirus situation has changed for the better, and we are preparing for life to get back to some semblance of normal — or, at least, a “new normal.”

Before Coronavirus — I’ll refer to it as “BC,” temporarily borrowing the term that usually refers in world history to the years “Before Christ” — Mother’s Day meant breakfast in bed prepared by little hands (hopefully under the guidance of a responsible adult so as not to burn down the house!), homemade cards proffered by our kids with great pride, visits to Grandma and perhaps Great Grandma, family gatherings at restaurants to mark the occasion, the first big backyard barbecue of the season for extended family (if Buffalo weather is cooperative), or perhaps a day where mom could spend precious hours on her own, enjoying a spa day or simply being free 6 WNY Family May 2020

— by Michele Miller to do whatever she wanted all day, with no cooking, no cleaning, and relieved of the responsibility of taking care of the kids.

BC, we’d have had to consciously make time in our busy schedules in order to prepare for this special day. Now, there’s a good chance that, for now, we’ll have to cross most of the above off our list of Mother’s Day traditions.

Breakfast in bed (assuming Mom’s favorite foods aren’t those usually found on what is now an empty shelf at the grocery store) and homemade cards are still doable. And we can visit with Grandma via Facetime, Zoom, or Skype if they’re tech savvy. But, communicating through a screen just isn’t the same as getting those real hugs and kisses we received BC from those we love and who love us dearly. When our “new normal” arrives, one thing’s for certain, we’ll have realized just how precious those demonstrations of affection and connection really are. “Elbow bumps” just don’t do it!

BC, Moms had to worry about get-

BC, Mom had to make sure there were sufficient funds in the school lunch account if she wasn’t preparing lunches for kids to take from home. Now she’s leaving home in the morning to pick up pre-packaged breakfasts and lunches offered by the schools or being at the bus stop on time, where instead of picking up students buses are dropping off meals. Or, she’s doing a lot of meal prep, not knowing whether it’s going to be safe to make the next trip for groceries, which disappear quickly when you have a growing family. If you’ve taken advantage of grocery delivery services like Instacart, even they are having problems keeping up with the demand… and toilet paper is a coveted treasure, if you can find it.

BC, getting kids to do homework wasn’t always easy. Now, parents have to take charge of “SHL” — stay-at-homelearning, as it has come to be known. My daughter has two children, one in 2nd grade and one in middle school. She’s trying to juggle Zoom class meetings for her 2nd grader and online lessons for her middle schooler which happen to have conflicting time schedules — imagine what parents of three or four kids are dealing with! In using the Internet for online schooling and her work video conferences plus her husband’s online work needs, she’s found that their Internet bandwidth is not always sufficient, a problem that didn’t occur BC. During one recent phone call, my daughter commented that she figured there’d be a baby boom about nine months from now (just like the one after the Blizzard of ’77, if you’re old enough to remember that far back). In a subsequent call, she said she thought the di-

vorce rate was going to soar — a hint, perhaps, of the increased tension that many families with kids have probably been experiencing.

On a positive note, both my grandkids have been healthy since schools shut down and social distancing has made it a nono for friends to be allowed inside the house. In a family where ear infections and “old-fashioned” generic viruses had been a common occurrence BC, illness seems to have disappeared. So, at least Mom is no longer spending a lot of time at urgent care or the pediatrician’s office for common maladies.

But now, mothers — who are usually a family’s “worrierin-chief” — have a much more serious illness to worry about.

While this virus doesn’t seem to be affecting children, there is still that niggling concern at the back of one’s mind. And what if Mom or Dad were to contract the virus? We’ve heard of cases of Dad being quarantined in the basement, or Mom having to lock herself in the bedroom to keep the rest of the family safe.

I do believe there is a silver lining to this entire situation.

Young families, including my daughter’s, who have always been on the go, busy, busy, busy with the kids’ school projects, after school activities, playdates, sleepovers, plus various work-related and social commitments for Mom and Dad, in addition to all the usual chores that must be accomplished to run a household, have had the time to slow down their hectic pace, chill out, and actually spend a great deal of quality time together. Something that, in today’s fast-paced world, has become a rare commodity. If two parents have been a great parenting team BC, they’re much more likely to be able to work in sync to get their family through this stressful time. (Here’s a shout out to Dad to let him know we’re aware he may have taken on some of the duties described above; we know he deserves credit, too!)

Yes, it will be a Mother’s Day like no other. We may still be under stay-at-home orders, or the worst may have passed and we’ll be able to use the day to reflect on how we managed to get through this challenging time, telling our children we adore them, even if they did drive us a little crazy for a while!

Stay safe, stay healthy, and stay sane… Happy Mother’s Day to all!

Michele Miller is the editor, publisher, and founder of WNY Family, which she started on a typewriter on her dining room table 36 years ago when her children were still taking naps every day!

F•A•C•T•S The Early Roots of Mother’s Day

The earliest Mother’s Day celebrations can be traced back to the spring celebrations of ancient Greece in honor of Rhea, the Mother of the Gods.

During the 1600’s, England celebrated a day called “Mothering Sunday,” celebrated on the 4th Sunday of Lent. This was a time put aside for relaxation and enjoyment during the long Lenten fast. Servants would go home to see their families, bringing cakes and sweets to their moms. This custom was called “going a-mothering.” Each mother would receive a simnel-cake (Latin for “fine flour”) and mothers would give a blessing to their children.

Other lore relates that centuries ago it was considered important for people to return to their home or “mother” church once a year. So, every year during Lent, people would visit their “mother” church, generally the main church or Cathedral of the area.

Mom Power!

U.S. moms control 85% of household purchases.

U.S. moms spending power is $2.4 trillion.

U.S. moms annually spend over $25,000 per toddler and $13,000 per child.

Moms are the primary source of income in 40% of US households, and 67% of those moms are single.

83% of new moms are millennials.

Millennial moms give birth to about 9,000 babies each day.

33% of moms ages 40-44 have 2 children, 19% have had one or three, 10% have had 4 or more.

72% of all moms work outside the home.

May 2020 WNY Family 7

F•A•C•T•S

Some Mother’s Day Trivia An AT&T survey estimated that 122.5 million phone calls to Mom are made on Mother’s Day. Other Mother’s Day findings revealed that 11 percent of people never call their mothers.

In the vast majority of the languages worldwide, the word for “mother” begins with the letter M. It appears some things are almost universal.

How Motherhood Made Me Appreciate My Mom — by Sarah Lyons

The carnation is the flower most often associated with Mother’s Day. Red and pink carnations for moms who are still living, and white carnations for mothers who have passed away. According to a legend, this association goes back to the passion of the Christ.

Seeing Christ’s sufferings, his mother Mary shed tears, which fell on the ground. These tears are supposed to have turned into the fragrant and beautiful carnations.

Mother’s Day accounts for one-fourth of the flowers purchased for holidays.

31% of Americans reported buying flowers or plants for Mother’s Day 2019.

Of fresh cut flowers purchased for Mother’s Day, carnations, mixed bouquets, and roses are all very popular.

8 WNY Family May 2020

W

hen I look back at each important moment in my life — the day I learned to drive, my graduation, my wedding, the birth of my first child, my mom is always standing in the background smiling and cheering me on.

More importantly, she was part of the other not-so-monumental moments in my life like when I got stung by a bee, when the kids teased me, and when I cried my way through my first broken heart. My mom was always there to support me through all the moments, big and small. Now that I have been a mom for a dozen years, I appreciate my mom so much more for the things she has always done with little or no recognition. I now realize the sacrifices she made and the monumental effort she put in. Here are just a few reasons why I appreciate my mom a whole lot more since becoming a mother myself.

For maintaining

A mother’s work is never done and it is a thankless job. Taking even one day off means more work for days

to come. Moms pick up the same toys, wash the same dishes, and do the same laundry over and over again. Not only do moms usually maintain the majority of housework but they also hold a mental inventory of all items in the home.

Most moms can recall the location of the baby’s favorite stuffed animal, the toddler’s missing shoe, the library books, the stapler, and any other random item a family member may request at any given time. I appreciate the example of steadfastness that my mom gave me for maintaining our home.

For managing

As moms, we often feel like we live in our minivans. Moms don’t just transport kids from one activity to the next.

They also maintain the family calendar, make appointments, and make sure everyone is in the right place at the right time with the right gear (musical instrument, snacks, sports gear, sunscreen, backpack, and the list goes on). Juggling school and activities in itself is a fulltime job that my mom (and most moms) manage with ease. I appreciate my mom

for being the social planner, taxi driver, and personal assistant to our whole family as we grew up.

For enduring

The first time I dropped my son off at a babysitter and watched him cry and reach for me in the window, my heart broke. As moms, we endure heartache often as we watch our children learn and grow, succeed and fail, and endure illnesses, hurt feelings, and disappointment. Our heart soars when they meet their goals and sinks when things don’t work out. Motherhood is a roller coaster of emotions that moms withstand without complaint. I appreciate my mom for her strong support of me even when she was hurting, too.

For the unseen

There are things moms do every day that go unnoticed.

Moms make sure the football jersey is clean before the next game, check in on a sick kid during the night, drop off a forgotten lunchbox, put puzzle pieces back where they belong, replace toothbrushes, clean out the pantry, email teachers with concerns, volunteer, cook, shop, and so many little things that keep a family going every day. The little things that don’t seem to matter, that most won’t notice, that no one asks for, that moms do just because they want to show their love for their family. I appreciate my mom for all the things she has done that I never thought to thank her for.

For loving me anyway

Faith

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Moms love their kids through tantrums, potty training, back talk, and rebellion. There is no doubt that raising kids is trying on the patience but moms have a way of letting us know that no matter what mistakes we make, they will be there to catch us when we fall. I appreciate my mom for loving me even when I was unlovable.

For letting me go

When you become a mother, you are the center of your child’s world. You feed them, change them, and comfort them.

The more they grow, the more independent they become. While this is something to celebrate, it can be heart wrenching to loosen the grip on a child and trust them to manage life and all of its challenges alone. It’s scary and new and feels more like a loss of control than anything else, but as you watch your child take on life’s challenges it can be a great sense of pride as well.

I appreciate my mom for letting me go, grow, and experience life in my own way.

This Mother’s Day, take notice of the hard work moms do every day. Acknowledge the little things they do, thank them for always being there, and since you might not be able to be together during the current COVID-19 situation, send them a virtual hug!

Sarah Lyons is a Kansas freelance writer whose work has been published in Pregnancy and Newborn Magazine KC Parent, Austin Family, Creative Child and over 130 other parenting publications.

NOTICE OF NONDISCRIMINATORY POLICY AS TO STUDENTS

First Trinity Preschool of Tonawanda admits students of any race, color, national and ethnic origin to all the rights, privileges, programs and activities generally accorded or made available to students at the school. It does not discriminate on the basis of race, color, national and ethnic origin in administration of its education policies, admissions policies and other school administered programs.

May 2020 WNY Family 9

A

s a workfromhome mom raising two sons, finding dedicated time to focus during the summer months is usually fraught with frustration. Then I landed on a gem of an idea that might seem a little kooky, but turned into a brilliant way for me to rescue my work day.

For any mom in similar straits (especially during the COVID-19 circumstances), please allow me to introduce you to the power of a tiara.

ne O e h T RY O S S Every ACCE

On a typical work day, no sooner do I slide into my office chair with a warm mug of coffee ready to respond to an email or edit an article, I’m interrupted with some sort of family situation. Usually the crises range from “I’m hungry and there’s nothing to eat...” to allegations of injustices such as “He won’t give me a turn on the Xbox!” and grievances like “He just punched me!”

It’s not that I haven’t tried to establish clear boundaries between work and family. As I shut the door of my office, I encourage my adolescent sons to be their own best problem solvers and to only interrupt me for code red emergencies, i.e., blood or fire. I’ve taped Do Not Disturb notes on my office door and promised outings when I’m done with my work. Nevertheless, they perceive my calls for time alone the same way speeders treat a speed limit sign — simply as a suggestion. My grouchy responses to yet another inane interruption while in the midst of a pressing deadline have little effect other than a sheepish, “Sorry, I forgot.”

I gave the situation some thought and remembered how a clever friend of mine cut short her three-year-old’s temper tantrum by putting a silly hat on top of her head to redirect his attention.

Could I tweak the idea to help send a message to my kids?

10 WNY Family May 2020

cess. It seems to me, the esteem a tiara carries is so hardwired into our DNA that anyone could sense its power, possibly even one of my sons.

The rhinestones wink in the sunlight streaming through the hallway window.

I wipe the amused smile from my face and walk into the room where my boys are haggling about whose turn it is to play Xbox. The living room resembles a disheveled frat house littered with microwave pizza boxes, popsicle sticks, and cups of halfdrunk lemonade.

Needs — by Christa Melnyk Hines After digging through a basket of some old costume jewelry, wigs, and hats in my closet, I discovered a tiara I received after running a Mother’s Day 5K a few years back. The playful tchotchke features cheap circlets of diamond rhinestones topped with three teardrop pink gems. I’d never before considered the lightweight plastic silver headband as anything special.

Taking it downstairs, I looked in the hall mirror and popped the tiara onto my sun-bleached blonde hair. Paired with my raggedy blue jean shorts and green cotton t-shirt, the ensemble isn’t electrifying, but the visual impact is beside the point.

Historically, the tiara symbolized wealth, leadership and distinguished social ranking. In Ancient Greece, tiaras made of garlands of wheat, laurel leaves, and flowers adorned the heads of athletes, honorable warriors, and dignitaries. Over the centuries, queens, princesses, and other noblewomen wreathed their heads with circlets of opulent pearls, diamonds, rubies, and sapphires to underscore their power and prestige.

Today, if not worn for a state occasion by a member of royalty, a tiara might crown the winner of a beauty pageant or complete the costume of a little girl dressed up as a Disney prin-

“I have an announcement,” I say to my two sons.

I stand in front of the television and snap my fingers in the air to get my 11-year-old Drew’s attention. He reaches up and pulls the noise canceling gaming headset off of his ears. Sitting on the floor, leaning his back on a chair cushion against the ottoman, his green eyes widen as he stares up at me.

I look over at Nolan, my 13-yearold, standing in the kitchen behind our center island munching on tortilla chips, which have scattered across the grey countertop and wood floor. His blue eyes gawk at me.

For once, my pair of rowdy boys are silent.

“See this tiara on my head?” I ask calmly.

They nod.

“Whenever you see me wearing it, it means I can’t talk to you. It means I’m in the middle of working on an assignment or in an interview. It means I can’t go looking for your shoes, download a new video game, or resolve an argument that you guys can figure out for yourselves.”

I pause for dramatic effect.

“It means, your mother, the queen, is working and is not to be disturbed.”

I raise my eyebrows at them, holding their gaze.

“Um. Ooo-kay, Mom,” Nolan says with a grin. He pops a tortilla chip into his mouth.

Drew rolls his eyes and pulls his headphones back on.

“And clean up this mess!” I declare, my hand regally sweeping across the living room. I spin around gracefully and walk slowly and stately back into my office and firmly shut the French doors.

A little while later, still wearing my tiara, I hear the boys tromping down the hall toward my office.

“Shhh, Drew, stop! We can’t talk to Mom right now. Look!” Nolan loudly whispers.

Out of the corner of my eye, I see them turn and tiptoe away. I smile to myself.

My bejeweled accessory may seem like a silly head ornament, but this decorative piece of frivolity takes on a deeper meaning by protectively encircling my personal time. It informs those around me that I take my time seriously.

More importantly, this crowning glory is a reminder to myself that in the midst of the demands of motherhood, I deserve sacred space, solitude, and time to fulfill my priorities. I am, after all, the queen of my domain.

Besides, even the best managers with open door policies have to shut themselves away sometimes if they are going to accomplish anything. Moms are no different. If there ever was one accessory I believe every busy mother needs, I highly recommend a tiara.

Award-winning freelance journalist and author, Christa Melnyk Hines specializes in family communication issues.

When she isn’t writing and weirding out her kids with her creative parenting strategies, she spends her time chauffeuring them all over town. Much to their relief, she usually remembers to remove her tiara before leaving home.

To My Teenage Son:

What I Want For Mother’s Day

I

— by Katy M. Clark

know better than to expect a handmade card from you this year. Or a necklace made out of macaroni noodles or a stone painted with the words, “Mom, you rock!” After all, you are in high school.

I will always treasure those cards and gifts from when you were younger, but what I wish for on Mother’s Day now that you are a teen has changed.

So, as you roll out of bed, probably forgetting about my special day even though your dad reminded you at least once, let me share what I want for Mother’s Day. These are the gifts that would mean the world to me this Mother’s Day: ♥ That I may always have a full pack of gum from which you can mooch. ♥ That my front seat continues to be a welcoming place for you to sit and chat with me, with plenty of legroom as you keep growing. ♥ That we will always bond over our cat, talking to her in baby voices and cracking each other up. (You could step it up in the litter box cleaning department, though.) ♥ That you will always want to tell me about whom you eat lunch with at school. ♥ That I can help you with your Language Arts homework when you ask because you know it was my strongest subject and it’s not yours. ♥ That I always have enough snacks for you in the pantry, and that I remember to buy two pounds of meat, instead of one, for recipes. You definitely have a bigger appetite these days. ♥ That I can encourage you to be

your best in whatever role your coach feels is right for you, forgetting about playing time and focusing on teamwork and skill development. ♥ That I relax about how much you enjoy Fortnite and other video games, savoring the time you are in my house and under my roof even as you scamper through a virtual world. ♥ That I continue to bring you a bowl of cereal in the morning as you fall back asleep on the couch before school. It’s a little thing you could do for yourself, but I don’t mind. ♥ That it will continue to be easy between you and me when I tease you about those girls you message on Snapchat. ♥ That I have the agility to dodge the laundry you leave on your bedroom floor and the patience to teach you — again — how to fold clothes and put them away.

Okay, I see your face. You are wondering how you can wrap any of these “gifts” or if I’m serious about them at all.

Please know that I am.

But don’t worry about getting me everything. The truth is that I’ve already received the greatest gift this Mother’s Day: The gift to be your mom, especially during these teen years.

Stop making that face. I’m serious.

And yes, you can have a piece of gum. It’s in my purse.

You know where.

Katy M. Clark is a writer who celebrates her imperfections as a mom at ExperiencedBadMom.com.

May 2020 WNY Family 11

C

Travel Chaos!

oronavirus has upended the world and the travel industry to an unprecedented degree.

It has also led to the cancelation of many long-planned Easter break family trips, including those of two area families.

The families started planning their trips more than a year ago when the world was a very different place. They were forced to cancel their trips as Coronavirus caused quarantines and border closings. Both families learned important lessons that can be helpful when life returns to normal.

The Perils of ThirdParty Websites “I started planning our trip to London last January 2019,” explained Kandis Fuller, an Amherst mother. “I have a friend living and working in London and we were planning to stay with her so our expenses would be lowered. My daughter Patty is now 11 years old and I thought, at her age, she would really be able to enjoy and appreciate the experience.”

She bought the airline tickets on a third-party website and the flights were nonstop from Toronto to London. She also purchased a package for a day trip by train to Paris and several tickets for London attractions including the London Eye. She is still waiting for refunds for these attractions.

What lessons did she learn from this unfortunate experience?

12 WNY Family May 2020

FAMILY TRAVEL

— by Deborah Williams “I will never again use a third-party website for booking airline tickets,” she said. “I spent hours and hours trying to contact them. In the future I will always book directly with an airline.

“I also purchased travel insurance and I am so glad that I did that. I will always get insurance for a big trip like this. In the end when I could not reach the travel website, I was able to receive assistance from the travel insurance company.”

nor announced that visitors would have to quarantine for 14 days, the nightmare began. I soon learned what a mistake we made booking this trip for six on a third-party website instead of the airline website. It just added a layer of complications that made everything harder to navigate.”

After hours and hours on the telephone with the website trying to cancel and get their money refunded, Sue finally was able to contact United Airlines and ended up with vouchers for future travel. She has vowed never again to use a third-party website.

She also discovered that children are often more resilient than we imagine they are.

When the Hawaii trip was finally canceled, Sue’s brother invited the family to his house in Ft. Myers, Florida for the Easter break. So, the vouchers were used to arrange tickets for six to Florida.

“I was afraid to tell Patty that we could not go on the trip because I thought she would be so upset, but I think I was more upset,” Kandis said.

“We will hopefully be able to do the trip next year.”

“Then the Florida governor announced that visitors from New York would have to go into 14-day quarantine, so we had to cancel that option,” she explained. “Clearly there will be no travel for us until life returns to normal.”

Sue Giallella, a Grand Island grandmother who is most experienced in planning complicated far-flung family trips, had been planning a Hawaii trip over Easter for her daughter, son-in-law, and her three granddaughters ages, 8, 12 and 14.

Don’t Cancel Too Soon

“I always start planning far in advance and we were all going to fly out of Toronto to Honolulu on April 9,” she explained. “When it became obvious that we had to cancel after the Hawaii gover-

For families who have already booked and paid for future trips in the summer or later, travel experts urge people NOT to cancel especially if they will suffer financially. If this nightmare ends before the planned trips, then they will surely be special trips. If travel is still impossible then the money will be re-

funded without question, but only if the flights, hotels, or cruises are canceled by the travel companies.

Michelle Couch-Friedman, executive director of Elliott Advocacy (Elliott. org), a travel consumer help website, said that preemptively canceling your future travel plans can end up costing you hundreds or even thousands of dollars.

“Remember, if no Coronavirus cancellation waiver is in place on the day you cancel, you won’t be eligible for future waivers,” she wrote. “If one is announced the day after your cancellation, you won’t qualify for that benefit. You can avoid this fate by resisting the urge to cancel your future travel plans right now.”

She also said you can avoid wasting your own time in calling airlines, cruise lines, or hotels if your trip is not scheduled within the next two weeks.

“By canceling too early, you could potentially save your travel provider from being forced to give you a refund later.”

That is definitely not a good plan.

No one knows the course of this pandemic.

Take A Virtual Trip Instead Do you have a trip planned that had to be canceled?

You could do as author Reif Larsen wrote about doing in a New York Times column. His family had planned on a spring trip to Charleston, South Carolina, so he and his three-year old son Max pretended to take the trip using Google Street View. Larsen provided the narration for his young son.

They landed at the Charleston Airport and rented a car. They grabbed some fresh grouper at Crosby’s Fish and Shrimp Co. and gazed at the Morris Island Lighthouse. His young son soon grew bored but older children could have fun with such an adventure.

Did you have a Florida beach vacation planned for the Easter break?

Check visitflorida.com and click on beach finder for virtual tours of beaches across the state. Pick a region and click on an area. Check on Sanibel’s live webcam or Your Perfect Day in Sanibel.

Maybe you had planned a trip to Washington, DC and visits to the Smithsonian Museums. The National Air and Space Museum is a perennial family favorite. View the gallery space through the online virtual exhibit and hear audio clips from the interactive audio tour narrated by James Earl Jones.

The National Zoo’s animal webcams are some of the most viewed on the Internet. Check out the cameras and learn about the animals at the same time. The giant panda, lion, and ele-

phant cams are the most popular. Spend some time at this site and when the zoo reopens you will be among the more educated visitors. Besides, it is definitely fun and can be a little addicting.

Take in the 360-degree views of the Matterhorn, the Hoover Dam, the Space Needle and much more at Google Earth.

Have you always dreamed of visiting Yosemite National Park? Go to virtualyosemite.org for an amazing experience including up close views of the night sky over Yosemite. Hike along the trails and listen to the sounds of the birds — a soothing experience in itself.

Other national parks including Kenai Fjords National Park, Alaska; Hawaii Volcanoes National Park, Hawaii; Carlsbad Caverns National Park, New Mexico; Bryce Canyon National Park, Utah; and Dry Tortugas National Park, Florida all offer virtual tours at the National Park Service website (nps.gov).

Deborah Williams is a veteran travel writer whose work has appeared in national and international publications.

She lives in Holland, NY and is the recipient of the Society of American Travel Writers Lowell Thomas Gold Travel Writing Award.

May 2020 WNY Family 13

Special Advertising Section DELAWARE SOCCER CLUB PRESENTS: 2020 SUMMER SOCCER CAMP SCHEDULE 9am - 3pm Daily

H June 29-July 2 Grassroots/ Elite Training Camp Ages 5-15 H August 24-27 Grassroots/ Elite Training Camp Ages 5-15

ter Regisay!

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BUFFALO’S GRASSROOTS SOCCER CLUB ALL CAMPS WILL TAKE PLACE AT: Point of the Meadow Field at Delaware Park Register online @ www.DelawareSoccerClub.com

Learn

USFA - Certified Coach Equipment Provided

toFence

Summer Camps

begin in July

Classes:

Fencing Center of Buffalo

Kenmore Schools DAY CAMP Franklin Middle School

Begins Monday, June 29th 8am – 4pm

• Swim Lessons • Golf Lessons • Tennis Lessons

TOO MANY OTHER ACTIVITIES TO LIST!!!

All for less than $4.00/hr.

All Day Camp Counselors are NYS Certified Teachers

Call Ralph Critelli at 861-0648 or Register Online at:

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Over Year 20 s!

Finest Chess Instructors in the US Beginners thru Advanced • Coed 5-16

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485 Cayuga Road Cheektowaga

Kids, Teens, Adults

Modding, Networking & Hosting with Minecraft Kodu Adventure Style Platform Style

Check website for details.

CALL 553-3448 www.fencingbuffalo.com 14 WNY Family May 2020

Ages 6 - 12

July 13th - 17th

This Year, Summer Camp Is More Important Than Ever Before!

T

he American Camp Association (https://www.acacamps.org) is keeping a close eye on ever-changing CDC guidelines during this critical time. ACA has had the opportunity to connect with the US Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) as they develop COVID-19 guidance for day and overnight camps for this summer. The CDC’s guidance will help state public health authorities and camp directors with their summer decisions, as well as utilize best practices in health management, community management, and camp operations.

As we find our way out of the standstill created by COVID-19, the critical question for many camp directors is “When should I make a decision about my camp strategy this summer?”

The answer to that question is complex and evolving daily. The safety of campers and staff must come first, and expert scientific guidance will be what drives the decision-making process.

There’s no doubt that parents who’ve already spent more than six weeks at home trying to keep their children occupied will be overjoyed if camps are open for the summer, even if the camp season has to be shortened.

This is the perfect time to remind ourselves why summer camp is so beneficial for our children! Summer camp is the perfect place for a child to develop a sense of independence, confidence, and resilience.

2 Summer Literacy Programs

One-to-one Tutoring & Half-day Camp

716-645-2470

buffalo.edu/clari ub-clari@buffalo.edu

Camp offers the opportunity for kids to see how much they are capable of without their parents hovering nearby — which they have done too much lately due to the virus.

At camp, kids are encouraged to set goals, challenge themselves, and overcome failure like struggling to climb a rock wall or completing a ropes course. Camp instills “grit” — the power of perseverance — in learning a new skill.

Camp is a place where everyone is trying new things, making it easier to deal with a challenging task, especially when non-family member mentors are there to encourage and coach, and fellow campers are there to cheer you on because they’ve been challenged in the same way.

There are so many different types of camps available today that every child should be able to find one that interests him or her. Perhaps more importantly in today’s digital world, camp gets kids outdoors and away from too much time spent in front of a screen. They have the opportunity to socialize, face to face, and make new friends in addition to acquiring new skills.

Hopefully, by the time WNY’s summer camp season arrives, health experts will have deemed it safe for them to open and provide our kids with a summer full of fun and camaraderie.

Check out the selection of camps found in our pages this month to acquaint yourself with the many camp options available, because once the “all-clear” is given, slots are certain to fill up quickly due to our extended period of “cabin fever” this spring!

May 2020 WNY Family 15

MSM

SUMMER CAMP

Day Care Mount St. Mary Day Care Serving the Community for over 30 Years!

~ Ages 18 months to 12 years ~ • Daily Field Trips • Sports & Swimming • Picnics, Crafts & Games

Special Advertising Section

Call

877-3464 Today!

855 Englewood • Tonawanda, NY

www.msmdaycare.org

SUMMER Links

i ng n r ea to L

SUMMER CAMP

www.apot-wny.com 716-874-6175

All day innovative camp, ages 5-10 ~ ACTIVITIES DESIGNED AND LED BY THERAPISTS ~

Be sure to check out our APRIL issue for more camp choices!

The best camp slots fill early, so...

DON’T DELAY! “Special things happen when children and horses are brought together”

Buffalo Equestrian Center Sign Up Now for

2020 SUMMER CAMP 4 Weekly Sessions 7-12 YEAR-OLD CAMP: July 21-24; July 28-31; August 4-7

5 & 6 YEAR-OLD CAMP: August 11-14

English Riding lessons year–round in our Indoor/outdoor facilities Ages 5-Adult

REGISTER ONLINE @ DAVIDDEMARIE.COM ~ OR AT THE STUDIO ~ 10151 MAIN STREET, CLARENCE, NY 716.510.2531 16 WNY Family May 2020

Call for more info: 716.877.9295 www.buffaloequestriancenter.org 950 Amherst Street, Buffalo, NY 14216 Email: becandbtrc@aol.com

ST. MARY’S

junior sailing

Five Day ay s A Week

CAMP

Contact

2020

boatinged@buffaloyachtclub.org or call

~ WEEKLY SESSIONS ~

Pre-K thru 8th Grade

Art ✱ Science ✱ Creative Movement ✱ Group Time ✱ Free Play ✱ Outdoor Play Time ✱ Field Trips

for more information

JULY & AUGUST

Children ages 6-16 Welcome Membership is not required

7am - 6pm Flexible Schedule Mid June - the End of August

NTS...

PARE Free y r Wor r Care! e Summ ..

KIDS. Fun! r e m Sum

Ask About ADULT SAILING LESSONS

BUFFALO YACHT CLUB

Elementary School NEW! All D

716-883-5900 ext. 201 www. b uffalo yacht c lub.org

four seasons summer Camp at 9 Mile Island

1 Orbit Drive Nine Mile Island • Amherst Great Outdoor Fun!

Call Today To Reserve Your Spot

716-683-2112

2 St. Mary’s Hill • Lancaster NY 14086

www.smeschool.com

• Swimming • Hiking • Field Trips • Arts & Crafts • In-house visitors and much more!

FOUR SEASONS CHILDCARE CENTER & PRESCHOOL

1639 N. French Rd., Getzville, NY 14068

Call 568-1140

www.fourseasonsfamily.com

enroll space now! limite is d

SUMMER DAY CAMPS A safe, structured environment July 6 - August 14

CAMP FLAMINGO and CAMP DARTWOOD

General Population • 4 to 12 years of age!

Children from the Cheektowaga area looking to have fun this summer in a purely recreational setting, are invited to attend our great Summer Day Camps! Here they have a chance to make new friends, explore, play, and swim. Two Locations Available.

~ Advanced Registration Required ~

CAMP CRABAPPLE

Registration is open to youths 4-14 years of age who have a developmental disability.

~ Advanced Registration Required ~

CAMP JI-IK-DO-WAH-GAH

Registration is open to youths 4-12 years of age who have a learning disability, speech impairment, ADHD/ADD or an emotional disability

~ Advanced Registration Required ~

Cheektowaga Youth & Recreational Services

275 Alexander Avenue • Cheektowaga, NY 14211 For Registration Information Email:

cheektowagacamps@gmail.com May 2020 WNY Family 17

Junior Sailing Camp Ages: 7 - 18 Weekly Sessions

Enrollment continues, Subject to Guidelines.

If closure is mandated, you will be refunded.

Sail Buffalo

Sailing School

KIDS AGES 4+ Join us for...

20 Summ e r Cam p 20

July through August • 9am-1pm

• Learn basic riding skills • Safety rules around horses • Horse care • Saddlery • Basic first aid

June 29th - Aug 28th

Great rates include meals, field trips, special guests, and fantastic staff!

Hours 7:30-5:30 daily

Cost: $325/Session

NEW Middle School “Leadership Lessons” Locations in: Grand Island and Williamsville

Registration Form Online

Skibbereen Farm

Call 639-8500

5142 Bussendorfer Road • Orchard Park, NY 14127

info@justforkidsonline.org

www.skibbereenfarm.com • 648-1908

justforkidsonline.org

Does your child struggle with social or behavioral challenges?

SUMMIT CAN HELP!

Five-week summer treatment programs: • Two specialized, evidence-based summer programs for children and teens with ADHD or autism spectrum disorder • Structured daily schedules; social, behavior, and academic skills training; all in a fun camp setting • Supervised by NYS licensed psychologists with expertise in ADHD and Autism

Applications available on-line. Enroll today!

To learn more or to register visit www.TheSummitCenter.org

(716) 629-3400

18 WNY Family May 2020

716-432-6589 www.sail-buffalo.org

HORSE CAMP at Skibbereen Farm

CAMP RUNS:

or call

info@sail-buffalo.com

Children In Action

GYMNASTICS

Come Join the FUN! rating Celeb ars 30 xypeerience! of E

Registering for Spring & Summer

OUR PROGRAM FEATURES:

• Gymnastics • Birthday Parties • Tumbling for children 12 months to 12 years old • Parent and Tot Classes • Exciting Circuit • Scaled down equipment for younger children

Call 662-6886

75 Mid County Drive, Orchard Park (Located in the Southtowns Tennis Center)

www.childreninactiongym.com

In Print and Online at wnyfamilymagazine.com

MAY 2020 PULL-OUT & SAVE

A Time-Saving Tool for Busy Families Get “up close and personal” with WNY businesses & organizations that cater to the needs of growing families!

8550 Main at Harris Hill, Williamsville

• Space still available in PreK 4 through 8 • 4-yr-old (1/2 or full day M, W, F) • Kindergarten Readiness (4 yr-olds, full-day, M - F) • Enhanced science programs, Choir, Band, Theater, Sports, Spanish, Technology and more

(716) 633-7441, ext. 317

nativityofmaryschool.org

BESTSELF BEHAVIORAL HEALTH Locations throughout WNY 716-884-0888 www.bestselfwny.org Provider of mental health & substance use disorder services for children and their families.

ENDEAVOR HEALTH SERVICES 1526 Walden Avenue, Suite 400 Cheektowaga, NY 14225 • 716-895-6700 www.ehsny.org Endeavor provides outpatient mental health and substance use treatment services.

SPECTRUM HEALTH & HUMAN SERVICES 227 Thorn Avenue Orchard Park, NY 14127 • 716-539-5500 www.shswny.org Helping families throughout WNY with mental health & addiction needs for 45+ years.

Art Supplies/Workshops:

HYATT’S - ALL THINGS CREATIVE 1941 Elmwood Ave. Buffalo, NY 14207 • 716-884-8900 www.hyatts.com/art Offering creative tools, classes, birthdays, and expert advice for creative projects.

See Our Advertiser Spotlight.

Breastfeeding:

THE CARE CONNECTION 3991 Harlem Road Amherst, NY 14226 • 716-725-6370 www.careconnectiononline.com Spectra® & Medela® breastpumps, replacement parts, supplies, consultations, classes, nursing tanks & bras. Insurance Reimbursement.

Childcare:

(Also See PRESCHOOLS/MONTESSORI) FOUR SEASONS CHILD CARE & PRESCHOOL 1639 North French Road Getzville, NY 14068 • 716-568-1140 www.fourseasonsfamily.com Programs for infants, toddlers, 2 & 3 year olds, 4 year old Pre-K and Summer Camp.

Hyatt’s - all tHings Creative

Offering Creative Tools, Classes, Birthday Parties And Expert Advice For Creative Projects.

spotligHt on

 Family Resource Guide  Family Resource Guide  Family Resource Guide  Family Resource Guide  20

Addiction Treatment & Mental Health Services:

or brainstorm with you on your latest creative endeavor whether it is in-store, over the phone, or through email. Unable to stop by in person? Give their full service customer service team a call or email to discuss product information, availability, and shipping options or shop online at www.hyatts.com/art.

Hyatt’s has been supporting the local creative community for over People have never had so many 60 years and continues to be a famoptions to explore their creative side ily owned and run business now in with the locally owned Hyatt’s All their third generation. Explore their Things Creative. With over 55,000 different products to choose from and an always expanding inventory, Hyatt’s has all the supplies you need to create anything from masterpieces to Pinterest projects.

They also have an extensive collection of children’s art supplies, fine 1941 Elmwood Avenue, Buffalo, NY 14207 716-884-8900 pens, and creative gift solutions. www.hyatts.com Experienced staff members are happy to have their brains picked @hyattsallthingscreative

new 40,000 square foot headquarters and home to the largest art store in the country located in North Buffalo.

Be sure to follow Hyatt’s on Facebook and Instagram to stay up to date on the return of their popular art workshops for adults and children, free Saturday Demos, birthday parties and numerous special events with local artists.

Paid Advertisement

JUST FOR KIDS 6265 Sheridan Drive, Ste. 106 Williamsville, NY 14221 • 716-639-8500 www.justforkidsonline.org Awarded Childcare Provider of the Year.

Before/After School, Break Camps, Enrichment.

MOUNT ST. MARY DAY CARE 855 Englewood Avenue Kenmore, NY 14223 • 716-877-3464 www.msmdaycare.org Before & After school and preschool program available; summer day camp available.

Childcare Resources:

COMMUNITY CHILD CARE CLEARINGHOUSE OF NIAGARA 1521 Main Street, Niagara Falls, NY 14305 716-285-8572 or 1-800-701-4KID E-mail: CCRRNiagara@niagaracap.org www.childcareofniagara.com The Niagara County Child Care Resource and Referral Program. “An Informational Source.”

Counseling: LYNNE RIFKIN SHINE, LMHC, CRC 1660 Hopkins Rd., Suite 103 Amherst, NY 14068 • 716-725-7158 www.auduboncounseling.com Specializing in couples counseling, parenting, grief & loss, anxiety & depression, infidelity, infertility.

Dance Instruction:

AMERICAN ACADEMY OF BALLET & DANCE 491 W. Klein Road (Dash’s Plaza) Williamsville, NY 14221 • 716-688-4774 www.aab-buffalo.com Offering Ballet (6yrs.-adult), Fairytale Dance (3 yr. olds), Broadway Dance, Pre-Ballet (4 & 5 yr. olds), Contemporary, Hip Hop, Jazz, Tap, Acro & Lyrical.

See Our Advertiser Spotlight.

Your Wellness, Our Mission.

Endeavor is here for you.

Telehealth Services are available for everyone. No copays or fees charged during COVID-19 Emergency.

Partnering with families on their journey, Endeavor has been a foundation of healing in the community since 1972.

We provide holistic, innovative, and evidence based treatment for those struggling with emotional concerns, life struggles, mental health issues, and addiction.

Formerly known as Mid-Erie Counseling and Treatment Services.

Give us a call to be linked with a therapist at (716) 895-6701 or visit ehsny.org for more information.

The Jewish CommuniTy CenTer of GreaTer Buffalo

spoTliGhT on

Everything for Children All in One Place at the JCC!

The JCC’s NAEYC accredited Early Childhood Centers have bright, spacious classrooms filled with developmentally appropriate toys and play equipment that encourage curiosity and creativity. Your child will enjoy all of the added features that make the Jewish Community Center special including instructional swim and pool safety classes, dance/ creative movement, music, and both indoor and outdoor playgrounds. Infants, toddlers and preschool children learn through play and develop “life” skills in a safe, nurturing environment where they build the self-confidence and skills

necessary to prepare them for Kindergarten.

Children in Grades K-6 love Kids Place, our after school program that runs 2:30-6:00pm Monday-Friday. Mature, highly trained staff work closely with children to encourage and teach creativity, cooperation and fun.

Children enjoy a healthy snack, receive homework help and form friendships with children from all over the district. The JCC also offers swim club, music lessons, Lego engineer programs, Tae Kwon Do and School Vacation week programs.

With two state-of-the-art fitness facilities, two indoor pools, an outdoor pool, summer day camps, free parking and free babysitting (offered free to full members), there is nowhere better to spend time with family and friends.

Tours are a great way to see everything

the JCC offers! Located in Getzville behind UB near Audubon Parkway and in Buffalo at the corner of Summer Street and Delaware Avenue, they are conveniently located near you. Visit www.jccbuffalo.org or call 688-4033 for Getzville or 886-3145 for Buffalo. The JCC welcomes every one of all cultures and religions.

Benderson Family Building 2640 North Forest Road Getzville, NY 14068 716-688-4033 Holland Family Building 787 Delaware Avenue Buffalo, NY 14209 716-886-3145

www.jccbuffalo.org Paid Advertisement

 Family Resource Guide  Family Resource Guide  Family Resource Guide  Family Resource Guide 

JCC EARLY CHILDHOOD CENTER 2640 North Forest Road Getzville, NY 14068 • 716-688-4033 787 Delaware Avenue Buffalo, NY 14209 • 716-886-3145 www.jccbuffalo.org Infants to pre-K, full & part-time options available Mon.-Fri., 7:30am-6:00pm.

Values-based & developmentally appropriate curriculum including learning to swim.

FIND US ON FACEBOOK See Our Advertiser Spotlight.

21

You are NOT alon e

Lynne Rifkin Shine, LMHC, CRC NYS Licensed Mental Health Counselor

Specializing in ...

• Grief & Loss • Anxiety & Depression • Parenting & Relationships

716-725-7158 | 716-689-3110 Ext. 1 1660 Hopkins Road, Suite 103 Amherst, NY 14068

www.auduboncounseling.com

Dance Instruction cont.:

CENTER STAGE DANCE STUDIO 4837 Union Road Cheektowaga, NY 14225 • 716-634-3395 www.CSDS.dance Encouragement and positive reinforcement though dance to reach ones personal best.

FIND US ON FACEBOOK ELITE DANCE COMPANY 5360 Genesee Street Bowmansville, NY 14026 • 716-288-7868 www.EliteDanceWNY.com Where every dancer counts so that each dancer can reach their fullest potential.

EUGENIA’S DANCE STUDIO 730 Orchard Park Road West Seneca, NY 14224 • 716-675-3128 www.eugeniasdancestudio.com Outstanding classes from Mommy & Me to Award-Winning Advanced Classes.

FIND US ON FACEBOOK

Dentists (Pediatric):

MAUREEN J. CASEY, DDS 4017 Legion Drive Hamburg, NY 14075 • 716-648-4035 www.drmcaseypediatricdds.com Pediatric Dentistry. Dental Care for Infants, Children, and Young Adults.

The next Family Resource Guide will appear in our October 2020 issue.

JUST 4 ME 1660 Hopkins Road Getzville, NY 14068 • 716-688-7721 160 Elmwood Avenue Buffalo, NY 14201 • 716-436-2130 www.just4mepediatricdentistry.com Gentle, Caring Dentistry for your child.

Most insurances accepted including Medicaid/Healthplex.

FIND US ON FACEBOOK See Our Advertiser Spotlight.

SPEZIO’S DANCE DYNAMICS 1639 N. French Road • Suite 300 Getzville, NY 14068 • 716-688-9590 www.speziosdancedynamics.com Offering quality classical dance instruction for all ages and levels since 1993.

See Our Advertiser Spotlight.

JuSt4Me pediatric dentiStry See What Kids Are Smiling About!

Spotlight on

 Family Resource Guide  Family Resource Guide  Family Resource Guide  Family Resource Guide  22

Experiencing Grief, Stress & Anxiety Due to Covid-19?

At “JUST 4 ME” Pediatric Dentistry, we believe that eating healthy foods and keeping good oral hygiene are essential to maintaining a healthy smile.

As parents, we know it is difficult to control what food is given to your child at daycare or school, BUT you can control what is given to them at home. Setting a good example of healthy habits NOW will help your child in many years to come.

Make grocery shopping or visiting a farmers market an adventure by giving your child a list of healthy food choices to buy. Let your child pick a new fruit or vegetable each week to taste-test at home. Keeping the kids involved in their food choices will help them eat healthier! It is important to keep in mind that although some foods appear healthy to eat they may NOT be healthy for your teeth. Foods like raisins and fruit snacks are NOT healthy choices for your teeth due to the sticky sugar that can cause cavities.

The #1 cause of cavities in children today are the gummy vitamins. Each gummy vitamin contains 2-3gm of sugar that sticks in the grooves of your teeth, which is the equivalent to skittles

candy. Most local pediatricians agree that CHEWABLE vitamins are a better choice. Here are a few chewable vitamins that are available in local stores: Flintstones, Nature’s Way “Alive”, Big Friends Natural Factors and Natures Plus Animal parade.

Call “Just 4 Me” Pediatric Dentistry to keep those smiles healthy!!

160 Elmwood Ave. Buffalo, NY 14201 716-436-2130 1660 Hopkins Rd. Getzville, NY 14068 716-688-7721 www.just4mepediatricdentistry.com Paid Advertisement

THE SUMMIT CENTER 150 Stahl Road, Getzville, NY 14068 General Information: 716-629-3400 www.thesummitcenter.org Developmental evaluations, therapeutic and clinical services, family support services, feeding clinic, behavioral health services, summer programs, respite, & school programs for children from birth to adult.

FIND US ON FACEBOOK See Our Advertiser Spotlight.

Pull out and save this section for future reference. And, remember, you can also find it online at www.wnyfamilymagazine.com

Farms & Farm Markets:

BECKER FARMS & VIZCARRA VINEYARDS 3724 Quaker Road Gasport, NY 14067 • 716-772-2211 www.beckerfarms.com U-Pick Fruits and Vegetables; Farm Market; CSA; Pies, Ice Cream; Animals; Educational Tours; A 126-Year Family Tradition! Visit Vizcarra Vineyards & Becker Brewing Co.!

Fencing Instruction:

FENCING CENTER OF BUFFALO 485 Cayuga Road Cheektowaga, NY 14225 • 716-553-3448 www.fencingbuffalo.com Learn to fence. Instruction in classical fencing. Kids, teens, adults. Equipment provided.

Family Medicine:

UBMD FAMILY MEDICINE Conventus, 1001 Main Street, 4th Floor Buffalo, NY 14203 • 716-550-8361 850 Hopkins Road Williamsville, NY 14221 • 716-688-9641 2465 Sheridan Drive Tonawanda, NY 14150 • 716-835-9800 www.ubfammed.com Accepting new patients and offering telemedicine services through UBMD CareConnect.

Academy of Ballet & Dance Arts

Specializing in Cecchetti Method Graded Ballet Syllabi Director - Lisa Taylor, FCCA

Classes Now Forming for Summer and Fall Sessions • Ballet • Pointe • Creative Movement Ages 3 - 4 • Modern • Jazz • Pre-Ballet • Pilates • Yoga • Classes for Children & Adults Also Offering

Romney Taylor’s

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Tell them you saw their ad in WNY Family Magazine.

Karate

446-0447

www.lrtaylorstudio.com LisaTaylorAcademy@gmail.com

97 North Park Avenue (Corner of Hertel Ave. in North Buffalo)

The SummiT CenTer

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Offering Programs & Services for Children with Autism The Summit Center provides educational, behavioral health, adult & community programs & services to children and adults with developmental, social and behavioral challenges. We accomplish this goal by using evidence-based practices and carefully monitoring progress.

Summit employs more than 500 staff members including special education teachers, behavior specialists, speech pathologists, occupational and physical therapists, psychologists, and respite providers. Most professional staff have Master’s degrees and many members of Summit’s leadership team have Doctoral

degrees and advanced training in Applied Behavior Analysis (ABA).

These professionals work closely with parents to help your child achieve the highest level of independence.

Following are the various programs we offer for your child and family: • Evaluations • Early Autism Program • ABA Services • Adult Programs • Summit Academy • Summer Programs • Respite Programs • Parent Training Programs Including Triple P (Positive Parenting Program) • Behavioral Pediatrics Clinic • Pediatric Feeding Clinic

To find out more about how Summit may be able to help your child, please call us at 629-3400 or visit our website at www.

TheSummitCenter. org.

150 Stahl Road Getzville, NY 14068 716-629-3400

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Educational Services:

23

BUFFALO TURNERS 3200 Elmwood Avenue Kenmore, NY 14217 • 716-877-2700 www.buffaloturnersgymnastics.com Gymnastics instruction for girls and boys, 20 months - 18 years.

CHILDREN IN ACTION 75 Mid County Drive Orchard Park, NY 14127 • 716-662-6886 E-mail: ciagym@aol.com www.childreninactiongym.com Gymnastics, Boys & Girls 12 months and up. Parent-Tot, Preschool Program, Tumbling, Birthday Parties, Field Trips, Playgroups. FIND US ON FACEBOOK GYMNASTICS UNLIMITED 70 Weiss Avenue Orchard Park/West Seneca, NY 14224 716-677-0338 www.gymnastics-unlimited.net Infant-18 yrs., Tramp/Tumble, Learning in Motion, Ninja, Open Time.

ROLLY POLLIES 9630 Transit Road, Suite 100 East Amherst, NY 14051 • 716-689-6151 4058 N. Buffalo Road Orchard Park, NY 14127 • 716-662-7424 1669 Hertel Avenue Buffalo, NY 14216 • 716-833-3318 www.RPWNY.com Children’s gym classes, birthday parties, open play & more for ages 4 months - 12 years.

See Our Advertiser Spotlight.

Hair Salons (Children’s):

SHEAR MADNESS 3316 Sheridan Drive Amherst, NY 14226 • 716-248-1455 3455 Amelia Drive Orchard Park, NY 14127 • 716-322-5332 www.shearmadnesskids.com Specializing in haircuts for kids, ear piercing, birthday parties and our unique toy store..

Health Care & Wellness:

GREAT LAKES MEDICAL IMAGING 199 Park Club Lane, Suite 300 Williamsville, NY 14221 • 716-836-4646 www.greatlakesmedicalimaging.com Open MRI, Low Dose CT, Mammography, Bone Density, Nuclear Medicine, PET/ CT, Ultrasound, and now introducing Interventional Radiology.

Rolly Pollies

WNY’s Largest Locally and Family Owned Kid’s Gym!

sPotlight on

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Gymnastics:

Rolly Pollies is WNY’s only gym for kids with a bouncehouse, trampoline, foam pit and more! For 15 years, Rolly Pollies has offered play with a purpose, through classes, open play, birthday parties, summer camps and more!

Why Classes?

Rolly Pollies’s class schedule accommodates every family’s schedule with evening, daytime and weekend classes. Families are encouraged to have fun together with equipment built for everyone! A full session of

classes gives children the opportunity to develop gross motor skills and friendships, learn socialization skills, take directions from “Roll Models”, and see the same friends each week.

Party With Us! Rolly Pollies offers WNYs best birthday parties, hosting only one party at a time: yours! Everyone is invited to play, no charge for adults, and the birthday child and their siblings are free too! This allows all families the ability to invite just as many friends. After all, it’s the people that make a party!

Play, Play, Play!

Rolly Pollies also offers lots of PLAY! Dependable Open Play hours are offered, Monday – Friday from 1:00 – 4:00, with no membership or reservations required.

Use Your Health Insurance Wellness Cards Raising heathly children is Rolly Pollies mission! Because of this, most area health insurances will help pay for your Rolly Pollies classes and events. Simply give your insurance company a call to see if they will cover

your child’s programs at Rolly Pollies.

Three great locations: East Amherst, Orchard Park, and North Buffalo www.

RPWNY.com Keep the learning going at home with our YouTube Channel; RollyPolliesWNY.

Funtastic Fitness For Kids

Three great locations: 9630 Transit Road East Amherst, NY 14051

716-689-6151

4058 North Buffalo Road Orchard Park, NY 14127

716-662-7424

1669 Hertel Ave. Buffalo, NY 14216

716-833-3318

www.RPWNY.com Paid Advertisement

CATHOLIC CHARITIES OF BUFFALO 525 Washington St. Buffalo, NY 14203 • 716-218-1419 ccwny.org Serving WNY with WIC, other basic needs; Counseling for all ages; Substance abuse treatment & more.

sasi

960 West Maple Court Elma, NY 14059 • 716-805-1555 www.sasinc.org Transforming lives through creative opportunities and excellent supports for people with disabilities and special needs.

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Marriage Help:

RETROUVAILLE OF BUFFALO Buffalo, NY 716-474-9371 www.helpourmarriage.org Program offers help for married couples facing difficult challenges in their relationship.

Martial Arts:

ROMNEY TAYLOR’S WORLD FIGHTING ARTS 97 North Park Ave. (Corner of Hertel Ave.) Buffalo, NY 14216 • 716-446-0447 E-mail: lisatayloracademy@gmail.com www.lrtaylorstudio.com Authentic Isshin Ryu Karate, since 1993.

Children, teens, adults. Developmentally appropriate, educational training emphasis.

Museums & Attractions:

AQUARIUM OF NIAGARA 701 Whirlpool Street Niagara Falls, NY 14301 • 716-285-3575 www.aquariumofniagara.org Visit WNY’s only aquarium. Sea Lions, Seals, Penguins and more!

GENESEE COUNTRY VILLAGE & MUSEUM 1410 Flint Hill Road Mumford, NY 14511 • 585-538-6822 www.gcv.org The largest living history museum in New York State, plus Nature Center and art gallery.

KENAN CENTER & ARENA 433 Locust Street Lockport, NY 14094 • 716-433-2617 www.kenancenter.org Visit our Kenan House gallery, Taylor Theater, Montessori pre-school and Kenan Arena.

AmericAn AcAdemy of BAllet & dAnce Offers Dance Camps for Everyone!

Spotlight on

An

ANNOUNCEMENT from the

American Academy of Ballet & Dance We hope that by summer, we will be able to return to our normal lives. Before we can make any definite commitments, we have to be sure that it is safe and secure to go on with our schedules.

We are planning Summer Classes and Camps with the hopes that students can return to normality again. The dates will depend on when the Government decides it is safe: June, July or even early August. We will be here for your children to bring the joy of

dance into their lives. Stay well and be safe.

Please check our website or Facebook for updates on when we will be opening.

PRINCESS CAMP: from 9:30am – Noon (Ages 4 to 8) SUMMER INTENSIVES: from 10:00am – 3:00pm (Intermediate & Advanced) All classes and camps take place in our five beautiful studios located in the Dash’s Plaza at 491 W. Klein and Hopkins Roads in Williamsville.

We will be offering the following: REGULAR WEEKLY CLASSES IN: Ballet, pointe, lyrical, hip hop, musical theatre, contemporary, and tap.

SUMMER DANCE CAMPS: from 9:30am – 12:30pm (Ages 8 and up)

491 West Klein Road (off Hopkins Road) Williamsville, NY 14221 716-688-4774 www.aab-buffalo.com Paid Advertisement

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Human Services:

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A Program of The Center For Handicapped Children, Inc. • Providing educational and therapeutic services to students with multiple disabilities, birth to 21 years of age • No tuition or transportation costs to families 1085 Eggert Road Amherst, NY 14226

(716) 831-8422

Learn More: www.CHCLearningCenter.org

Monthly membership model of outpatient pediatric medical care – No copays or deductibles required

Purely Pediatrics Medical direction available in person or through text/email/Facetime Newborn home visits A Pediatrician who knows your child Dr. Susan Wiepert 110 C North Seventh St., Lewiston, NY 14092

716-205-3282 www.purelypediatrics.com

NIAGARA POWER VISTA AT THE NIAGARA POWER PROJECT New York Power Authority 5777 Lewiston Road (Route 104) Lewiston, NY 14092 716-286-6661 or 1-866-NYPA-FUN www.nypa.gov/niagarapowervista Experience powerful fun for all ages at the Niagara Power Vista. A USA Today “10 Best in Niagara.” 50+ interactive exhibits, including a 4D simulated ride.

Open daily 9 am - 5 pm excluding some holidays. Always free admission and parking. Visit nypa.gov/niagarapowervista.

Discover Niagara Shuttle Service.

Handicap accessible.

Music Instruction/ Instruments:

BETTY’S MUSIC TOGETHER 716-239-9144 www.BettysMusicTogether.com Join our community of families and make musical memories with your child!

Sing, dance, play and learn in our fun, educational classes. Tuition includes CD, beautiful 4-color songbook and access to the online Family Music Zone with digital downloads.

Ages birth – 8.

Classes in Amherst and Buffalo.

Obstetrics & Gynecology:

UBMD OBSTETRICS & GYNECOLOGY 755 Wehrle Drive Williamsville, NY 14225 • 716-636-8284 Conventus, 1001 Main Street, 4th Floor Buffalo, NY 14203 • 716-636-8284 www.ubmdobgyn.com Care for every woman… for every phase of life. See Our Advertiser Spotlight.

Occupational Therapy:

ABC THERAPEUTICS 11390 Transit Road East Amherst, NY 14051 • 716-580-3040 Email: info@abctherapeutics.com www.abctherapeutics.com Occupational & physical therapy. Clinical specialists, individualized programs & family-friendly care.

Orthodontists:

OWL ORTHODONTICS MATTHEW WALLA, DDS & ASSOCIATES 716-832-1550 www.owlortho.com 6 Convenient Locations: Amherst, Buffalo, Clarence, Depew/Lancaster, Grand Island & Williamsville.

Party Resources:

SHEAR MADNESS See Listing Under “Hair Salons (Children’s)”

UBMD oBStetricS anD gynecology Utilizes Telemedicine Services for New and Existing Patients

Spotlight on

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Museums & Attractions cont.:

In April UBMD Obstetrics & Gynecology, along with the entire UBMD Physicians’ Group, launched UBMD CareConnect, a new telemedicine service for its patients.

UBMD CareConnect provides access to the vital care patients need without having to come to the office.

Telemedicine visits are conducted via video or phone call, depending on the patient’s appointment, need and the patient’s available resources. For each visit, the patient’s provider will determine if the appointment can be done by video call, phone call or if an in-person visit is required.

UBMD CareConnect video visits can be accessed from smartphones, tablets, laptops and desktop computers.

On a case-by-case basis, as determined by the provider, appointments may be done in-person. If during the pandemic, a patient’s appointment isn’t eligible for UBMD CareConnect and an inperson visit is determined, all UBMD spaces have been safeguarded for both our patients and team members. Numerous protocols for COVID-19 screenings and protection measures have been implemented, as well as already rigorous cleaning practices have been enhanced to ensure safety.

And as we all emerge from the pandemic, call us to set up or to reschedule an appointment. We are right there with our patients as we always have been, aligning with the latest clinical guidelines for patient care no matter if in person or via telemedicine. Whether you are at home, in our offices or in the hospital, you will always receive the same world class standard of care UBMD is known for.

Conventus - Buffalo 1001 Main Street, 4th Floor Easy Parking Williamsville 755 Wehrle Drive Call for an appointment (716) 636-8284

ubmdobgyn.com

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Preschools/Montessori:

Performing Arts:

ROOTS OF THE FUTURE MONTESSORI SCHOOL 8970 Main Street Clarence, NY 14031 • 716-545-8048 www.rootsofthefuture.com An education that understands and nurtures your child’s natural curiosity for knowledge.

PURELY PEDIATRICS 110C North Seventh Street Lewiston, NY 14092 • 716-205-3282 www.purelypediatrics.com A membership-based direct pediatric primary care clinic located in Lewiston, NY.

ACADEMY OF THEATRE ARTS 4231 Transit Road Williamsville, NY 14221 • 716-810-0551 www.academyoftheatrearts.com Nationally award winning ATA; offering theatre, dance and voice classes to ages 4-18.

See Our Advertiser Spotlight.

ZPAC PERFORMING ARTS CENTER, LLC Southgate Plaza - 954A Union Road, Suite 3 West Seneca, NY 14224 • 716-608-1010 www.zpac.biz A unique performing arts center with dancing, singing, acting and creating art.

FIND US ON FACEBOOK

Physical Therapy:

ABC THERAPEUTICS See Listing Under “Occupational Therapy”

Find this section ONLINE in our digital issue at www.wnyfamilymagazine.com

LEARNING IN MOTION/ GYMNASTICS UNLIMITED See Listing Under “Gymnastics”

Christ-Centered Education PreK 3 & 4, K – 8th Grade Top Rankings in NY State Assessments

Schools:

BUFFALO SEMINARY 205 Bidwell Parkway Buffalo, NY 14222 • 716-885-6780 buffaloseminary.org Buffalo Seminary - Independent day and boarding school for college-bound girls & day and sleepaway camp for girls entering grades 5-9.

FIND US ON FACEBOOK See Our Advertiser Spotlight.

CHC LEARNING CENTER 1085 Eggert Road Amherst, NY 14226 • 716-831-8422 www.chclearningcenter.org Quality educational, therapeutic & health services for students with multiple disabilities, 0-21 years.

FIND US ON FACEBOOK

Safe & Loving Environment NLSA Accredited NYS-Aligned/Faith-Based Quality Curriculum Before & After School Child Care Technology, Art, Music, Phys. Ed. Community Mission Projects

www.ThinkTrinityChristian.com 146 Reserve Rd • West Seneca, NY

716-674-5353

AcAdemy of TheATre ArTs

spoTlighT on

Giving Students the Opportunity to Shine

Winner of New York Theatre Guide’s “Best Theatre Program for Young Artists”; Academy of Theatre Arts is the only full-time, year-round theatre venue in Western New York created for the development and training of children and young adults in acting, vocal performance, and musical theatre dance. ATA provides an extensive year-long program for anyone between the ages of 3 and 18 who has an interest and passion for theatre arts. But beyond its excellent theatrical training, ATA uses theatre as a platform to teach and promote excellence in public speaking, self-esteem, confidence, and personal skills.

Each year, the students of ATA perform a major school showcase, which gives them the opportunity to shine on our ATA Theatre stage. ATA creates entertaining, professional shows consisting of smaller student casts and providing each child with more stage time in a much shorter show. In addition to regular classes, ATA offers special audition-only student companies where students get the opportunity to perform in their own musical, attend workshops, work with Broadway performers, and compete in festivals.

In addition to their year-round program, Academy of Theatre Arts offers summer programs to provide students with the opportunity to learn and perform in a full-blown musical in just 1-2 short weeks. While youngest students begin by learning about public speaking and how to feel comfortable on stage, older students learn about all aspects of a theatrical production: what it takes to put on a musical not only on stage but off stage as well.

4231 Transit Rd. Williamsville, NY 14221 (716) 810-0551 www.academyoftheatrearts.com Paid Advertisement

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Pediatricians:

27

CHRIST THE KING SCHOOL 2 Lamarck Drive Snyder, NY 14226 • 716-839-0473 www.myctkschool.com Offering PreK3 - 8th grade.

STREAM School/STREAM Academy.

FIND US ON FACEBOOK

Christ the King School ~ Founded in 1929 ~

NATIVITY OF MARY SCHOOL 8550 Main Street at Harris Hill Road Williamsville, NY 14221 • 716-633-7441 www.nativityofmaryschool.org Educating students Pre-K through 8th grade. For information or tour, call ext. 317.

Christ the King School offers faith based education in a safe, nurturing and challenging environment.

Rigorous Academic Excellence plus Art, Latin, Spanish, Music, Sports, and Technology.

A STREAM School & Academy MSA CESS Accredited.

Enrollment is now OPEN Private Tours Available CALL TODAY!

ST. GREGORY THE GREAT SCHOOL 250 St. Gregory Court Willliamsville, NY 14221 • 716-688-5323 Email: info@stgregsschool.org www.stgregsschool.org Pre-school 3 and 4, early kindergarten to grade 8.

ST. MARY’S ELEMENTARY SCHOOL 2 St. Mary’s Hill Lancaster, NY 14086 • 716-683-2112 www.smeschool.com St. Mary’s has a history of academic excellence and strong family values.

ST. MARY SCHOOL, SWORMVILLE 6919 Transit Road East Amherst, NY 14051 • 716-689-8424 www.stmaryschoolswormville.org Dedicated to the whole child… serving the entire family. Montessori PK-8.

TAPESTRY CHARTER SCHOOL 65 & 111 Great Arrow Avenue Buffalo, NY 14216 • 716-204-5883 www.tapestryschool.org A vibrant community of learners and leaders. See Our Advertiser Spotlight.

TRINITY CHRISTIAN SCHOOL 146 Reserve Road West Seneca, NY 14224 • 716-674-5353 www.thinktrinitychristian.com Providing Christ-centered education for PK-3 through 8th grades since 1851.

NLSA Accredited.

This handy resource guide appears twice a year, in WNY Family’s May & October issues Call 716-836-3486 ext. 104 to learn how your business or organization can participate

2 Lamarck Drive | Amherst, NY 14226

(716) 839-0473

www.myCTKschool.com

TapesTry CharTer sChool A Vibrant Community of Learners and Leaders

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Schools cont.:

Tapestry Charter School is an artsintegrated, K-12 project based learning, tuition-free, public school. Our campus is housed in two buildings on Great Arrow in Buffalo. In 2018 we opened a brand new K through 5th grade building with state of the art dance studio, art, music and S.T.E.A.M. room. Tapestry is a vibrant, sustainable school that empowers learners and leaders to make a positive impact in our communities and beyond.

Tapestry Charter School grades K-5 provides its students with a robust curriculum that is aligned to NYS standards and prepares students with the fundamental knowledge they need for success in school and life. In addition the students explore the arts, dance and study a foreign language.

Tapestry Charter Middle School Tapestry Charter School offers: provides its students with a rigorous • A (New)K-5 Campus and 6-12 Campus curriculum that is aligned to NYS • Small class sizes standards and prepares students for • College Prep & Honors Program success in high school. Middle students • Fieldwork and Teambuilding explore the arts and study a foreign • Visual Arts, Music, Theatre & Dance language. Students have the ability to • Computer Labs/CAD Labs take accelerated course work so they • Credentialed EL Education School can complete two high school Regents • Section IV Athletics courses while still in middle school.

Tapestry Charter High School For more information, check out our provides its students with a rigorous website or call to find out about Public curriculum that prepares our students Information Sessions. for success in college and career. Students have the ability to take accelerated course work so that they can complete dual enrollment college courses and AP courses to further them for success in college.

65 and 111 Great Arrow Avenue Buffalo, NY 14216 K-5 Office (716) 332-0754 Middle School Office (716) 332-0755 High School Office (716) 204-5883

www.tapestryschool.org Facebook: Tapestry-Charter-School Twitter: @tapestrycharter Paid Advertisement

Senior Housing:

PEOPLE INC. SENIOR LIVING 716-817-9090 www.people-inc.org People Inc. operates 19 Senior Living apartment complexes throughout Western New York.

PRESBYTERIAN SENIOR CARE 3735 Delaware Avenue Kenmore, NY 14217 • 716-874-6070 214 Village Park Drive Williamsville, NY 14221 • 716-631-3430 (Behind North Presbyterian Church, 300 North Forest Rd., Williamsville) 305-327 High Street Lockport, NY 14094 • 716-434-8805 Email: kziegler@pscwny.org www.pscwny.org Income eligible housing & services in Kenmore; Gracious independent living in Williamsville; Adult Care Facility in Lockport. FIND US ON FACEBOOK

SKATE GREAT 2982 Lakeview Road, Hamburg, NY 14075 3465 Broadway, Cheektowaga, NY 14227 75 Weiss Road, West Seneca, NY 14224 41 Riley Street, East Aurora, NY 14052 716-580-3458 E-mail: sk8gr8info@gmail.com www.sk8gr8.com #1 Learn-To-Skate Program in WNY. Over 20 classes per week.

Sleep Consultant:

GOOD NIGHT SLEEP SITE BUFFALO 716-572-4276 Email: lynn@goodnightsleepsite.com www.goodnightsleepsite.com/buffalo Infant and toddler sleep consultant.

Custom sleep plan with individual support.

FIND US ON FACEBOOK

SNAP Benefits:

FOOD FOR ALL/NOEP PROGRAM 1272 Delaware Avenue Buffalo, NY 14209 • 716-882-7705 You may be eligible for SNAP Benefits.

Call NOEP (Nutrition Outreach Education Program).

Stay Healthy with

SNAP.

Are you caring for an older loved one who is skipping meals to meet monthly bills?

SNAP could help them to buy the food they need to stay healthy. The Nutrition Outreach and Education Program (NOEP) can help your loved one find out if they may be eligible for SNAP. A NOEP Coordinator will work with you through the entire application process, answering any questions you have along the way. All services are free and confidential.

Contact your local NOEP Coordinator today and ask about SNAP.

FOOD FOR ALL ~ Erie County

TEXT or CALL 716-262-6864 | 716-364-7573 Prepared by a project of Hunger Solutions New York; funded by NYSOTDA and USDA/FNS. This Institution is an equal opportunity provider.

Spezio’S Dance DynamicS

Spotlight on

Instilling Passion & Building Character One Step At A Time!

Spezio’s Dance Dynamics, Amherst’s premier dance training center, has been educating young artists from beginner to pre-professional since 1993, while enhancing each dancer’s creativity, physical fitness and passion for the art of dance.

Director and Owner Michelle Spezio holds extensive teaching background in all genres and aspects of training enhances opportunities for all students whether they intend to pursue a

career in the arts or are dancing for enjoyment. The professional staff of degreed teachers is dedicated to providing students a well-rounded dance education to all. SDD offers a professional studio with 4 class rooms, many amenities and versatile subjects of study as well as high level ballet training for dancers to discover their personal talents.

“Dancer’s TurnOut Better,” that’s what we believe.

Research shows that students who study dance are disciplined, goal oriented and selfmotivated. Dancers are expressive in their communication of emotions, likely to excel, creative, imaginative and able to critically analyze and problem solve.

Educating dancers to use these life skills in pursuing goals, overcoming obstacles and staying physi-

cally fit throughout their lives is our goal.

Dance Dynamics Students have won significant awards for proper training/choreography all through the USA. Dancers have attended many prestigious summer intensives and awarded scholarships. SDD is committed to helping every dancer experience the joy of dance! Spezio’s Dance Dynamics is a proud member of Dance Master’s of America, International Dance Entrepreneurs Association, NDEO, Award winning faculty and director, and has had the pleasure of training so many talented dancers. SDD dancers are going places!

1639 N. French Road, Amherst, NY 716-688-9590

www.speziosdancedynamics.com Paid Advertisement

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Skating Lessons (Ice):

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St. Gregory the Great School A PK3-8 Faith Filled Education

Spots available for Fall 2020

Special Needs Services:

THE CHILDREN’S LEAGUE 393 North Street Springville, NY 14141 • 716-592-9331 www.tclny.org Center & home-based educational & therapeutic programming. EI & CPSE Evaluations. Serving children birth-8 years of age.

COMMUNITY SERVICES FOR EVERY1 180 Oak Street Buffalo, NY 14203 • 716-883-8888 Email: info@csevery1.com www.csevery1.com Helping people of all abilities reach their fullest potential.

HIGH HURDLES sasi - 13339 Route 39 - PO Box 526 Sardinia, NY 14141 • 716-496-5551 www.sasinc.org/high-hurdles Therapeutic horsemanship program serving individuals with disabilities.

Discover the Difference of a St. Greg’s Education Today!

Contact us for a tour!

250 St. Gregory Court, Williamsville, NY

716.688.5323 www.stgregsschool.org

MOVING MIRACLES DANCE STUDIO sasi - 954 Union Road, Suite 1 West Seneca, NY 14224 • 716-656-1321 www.movingmiracles.org Therapeutic dance/movement program for individuals with developmental disabilities and special needs.

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These great resources are available all year long!

Summer Camps:

ACTIVE LEARNING CAMP Nardin Academy Buffalo, NY 14222 www.activelearningcamps.com USAChess Camp (ages 5-16) beginner - advanced. Video Game Creation Camp (ages 8-16).

Toys/Games:

FISHER-PRICE® TOY STORE 636 Girard Avenue East Aurora, NY 14052 • 716-687-3300 www.fisherpricetoystore.com We carry Fisher-Price® and Mattel ® products. Ask about our weekly specials.

Urgent Care: PEOPLE INC. 1219 North Forest Road Williamsville, NY 14221 • 716-817-7400 www.people-inc.org People Inc. is Western New York’s leading non-profit human services agency, providing services to people with special needs, their families and older adults to achieve greater degrees of independence and productivity. Services include: Residential, vocational and supported employment, respite, senior services, health care and community outreach.

PERSONAL TRAINING BY sasi sasi - 954 Union Road, Suite 1 West Seneca, NY 14224 • 716-656-1321 www.sasinc.org/adaptive-fitness An adaptive, small group personal training program for individuals with developmental disabilities.

WNY IMMEDIATE CARE 2099 Niagara Falls Boulevard Amherst, NY 14228 • 716-564-2273 2497 Delaware Avenue Buffalo, NY 14216 • 716-874-2273 5014 Transit Road Cheektowaga, NY 14043 • 716-684-2273 3050 Orchard Park Road Orchard Park, NY 14224 • 716-675-3700 7616 Transit Road Williamsville, NY 14221 • 716-204-2273 www.wnyimmediatecare.com For quick, quality treatment in an hour or less, 365 days a year visit WNY Immediate Care. On-site physicians and advanced practice clinicians provide cost effective treatment of coughs, colds, flu, allergies, and other non-life threatening injuries. With five convenient locations, we help you Get In. Get Out. Feel Better!™

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 Parenting Resources  Parenting Resources  ABUSE/DOMESTIC VIOLENCE n New York State Office of Children & Family Services https://ocfs.ny.gov/main/prevention/ State Hotline: 1-800-342-3720 Report abuse/neglect of children. If you believe a child is in immediate danger, call 911 or your local police department. n New York State Office for the Prevention of Domestic Violence https://opdv.ny.gov/aboutopdv New York State Domestic & Sexual Violence 24 hour Hotline: 1-800-942-6906 According to Safe Horizon, a New York victims’ services agency, 1 in 4 women will experience domestic violence; more than 3 million children each year witness domestic violence at home; without help, girls who witness domestic violence are more vulnerable to abuse, and boys are more likely to become abusers of their partners and children as adults, continuing a cycle of violence seen in families all too often.

Look for it in our May & October Issues!

Family Resource

Guide

A Resource Guide for Busy Families

Reserve your Directory Listing for as little as $85.00 and you’ll also be included in our Online Business Directory at

NO ADDITIONAL CHARGE! To advertise or for more Information: Contact Your Ad Rep Directly or Call 836-3486 x104

n Haven House Child & Family Services 24-Hour Hotline: 716-884-6000 (for HELP & Shelter) For over 35 years, Haven House has been working to prevent domestic violence/intimate partner violence and promote peace in the home. Services are based on a continuum of care ranging from a fully-inclusive emergency shelter in a confidential location to long-term transitional housing. The continuum of care includes an extensive counseling and advocacy program for all individuals regardless of gender that includes many satellite locations throughout Erie County.

Who Should Call? Anyone involved in an intimate partner violence or family violence situation, including: domestic violence, dating violence, stalking, those in same-sex relationships, those with disabilities, male survivors, senior citizens, and immigrant and refugee victims of domestic violence. Friends, family members, co-workers, neighbors, or professionals with questions about domestic violence operates safe and secure emergency housing in a confidential location for women and their children, single women, and transgendered individuals identifying as female.

Shelter supportive services include: Safety Planning, Individual Counseling, Support groups (including Art Empower-

ment), Advocacy. Referrals can call the hotline for information. Haven House housing assistance, Referrals to transitional housing, Food, Clothing, Crisis Intervention, and Children’s Programs. n Family Justice Center of Erie County 716-558-SAFE (7233) www.fjcsafe.org Offers free services for domestic violence victims and their children through an extensive collaboration with 13 partner agencies, all located at one secured, comfortable location, where victims can get all the services they need to safely escape abuse. They currently have the following locations: Buffalo 438 Main St., Suite 201, Buffalo 716-558-7233 (Monday-Friday; 8:30am-5pm) Southtowns Satellite 4383 South Buffalo St., Orchard Park 716-662-0259 (Wed. & Fri; 8:30am-5pm) Northtowns Satellite 330 North Forest Rd., Amherst 716-634-4309 (Mon. & Tues.; 8:30am-5pm) Grand Island Satellite 1801 Grand Island Blvd. Suite 3 Grand Island 716-507-0764 (Mon. & Wed.; 8:30am-5pm)

AFTER SCHOOL CARE n For a very comprehensive list of more than 100 after school care programs in Erie County visit www.211wny.org and enter “after school” in the search box.

Information on programs in Niagara and other counties is also available through this site. If you do not have access to the Internet, call 1-888-696-9211.

BREASTFEEDING n La Leche League International www.lllusa.org La Leche League has several groups meeting in WNY as well as leaders who are available to answer your questions about breastfeeding. If you are unable to find a leader in your area, call 1-877-4-LALECHE (1-877-452-5324).

Amherst • Cynthia, 716-989-7070; Cindy, 716-835-7504.

East Aurora • Karen, 716-652-0225.

Hamburg/West Seneca • Kimberly, 716-997-4662; Amanda, 716-220-1597 Niagara Falls • Christine, 716-523-1143.

CHILD SUPPORT ASSISTANCE n Child Support Enforcement (CSE) Erie Co. Dept. of Social Services Rath Building, 7th Floor Buffalo, NY 14202 Helpline: 888-208-4485 (8am-7pm) CSE can help locate the non-custodial parent, help parents establish paternity if either has any doubt about the identity of a child’s biological father, help the custodial parent file a petition in Family Court for an order of support, and enforces a child support order when the non-custodial parent does not pay.

The child support enforcement program has legislative authority to collect overdue child support (arrears) and to obtain medical coverage through a variety of administrative procedures. Some administrative procedures can be put into action without going to court.

Noncustodial parents who fail to pay child support can be subject to having the funds automatically deducted from their wages; unemployment payments, federal and/or state tax refunds, and lottery winnings can be intercepted; financial assets, including bank accounts, can be seized. Delinquent noncustodial parents can also have their NY State drivers license suspended and can be prevented from obtaining or renewing their passports.

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INCLUSIVE. INNOVATIVE. INSPIRING.

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2020 - 2021

For further information about Child Support Services in New York State visit www.newyorkchildsupport.com.

– continued next page

Pull out and save this section for future reference. And, remember, you can also find it online at www.wnyfamilymagazine.com

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Buffalo Seminary

Spotlight on

Independent Day and Boarding School for College-Bound Girls

Worried about your daughter’s academic success? Worried she’ll be lost when school starts again? We’ve got you. SEM is among the oldest schools for girls in the U.S. We’re tried and tested in the classroom and now as a recognized leader in distance learning while 169 years of traditions anchor our community.

We’ve had technology woven into the curriculum for over a decade. SEM girls are independent, resilient, and ready to meet the challenges of a rapidly changing world with resourcefulness and resolution.

We are a Committed Steinway Select School and Niche named us the Best All-Girls School and Best College Prep School in the Buffalo Area.

Centered by our Academic & Social Honor Code, we have designed an independent culture of achievement, scholarship, creativity, leadership, and service that challenges girls to engage and explore opportunities from theater to sports, to public speaking and computer science.

Our small class size keeps even distance learning personal and connected. We do not require uniforms and are not bound by NYS Regents.

Our teaching goes beyond state mandates.

Take a virtual tour of our campus here: buffaloseminary.org/VR. Over 30 student scholarships are offered. Entrance & Scholarship Exam dates are available by appointment.

Forward thinking is our oldest tradition.

Accredited by the New York State Association of Independent Schools (NYSAIS), we are also a member of the National Association of Independent Schools (NAIS), the National Coalition of Girls’ Schools (NCGS), the Online School for Girls (OSG), The Small Boarding School Association (SBSA), The Association of Boarding Schools (TABS).

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716-885-6780 www.BuffaloSeminary.org Paid Advertisement

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 Parenting Resources  Parenting Resources 

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 Parenting Resources  Parenting Resources  Parenting Resources  DIVORCE SUPPORT

n NY State Parent Education & Awareness Program http://www.nycourts.gov/ip/parent-ed/ Launched in 2005, and offered under the auspices of Catholic Charities of Buffalo here in WNY, this program is designed to educate divorcing or separating parents about the impact of their breakup on their children. The primary goal is to teach parents ways they can reduce the stress of family changes and protect their children from the negative effects of ongoing parental conflict in order to foster and promote their children’s healthy adjustment and development. Four topics are addressed in the Parenting & Child Well-Being portion of the curriculum: 1) Creating and Maintaining Supportive Parent-Child Relationships 2) Providing a Stable, Supportive Home Environment 3) Maintaining Healthy Parental Functioning & Psychological Well-Being 4) Protecting Children from Ongoing Conflict Between Parents.

An overview of the Legal Process is also included.

In Erie County, there are “Our Kids: A Parent Education & Awareness Program” class locations in Amherst, Buffalo, and Hamburg; contact Amy Morris, 716-896-6390 ext. 3105 or email amy.morris@ccwny.org.

In Niagara County, there are class locations in Niagara Falls and Lockport; contact Marie Ross, 716-2822351 or email marie. ross@ccwny.org.

If you live in any other county, visit the web site for a list of providers. n New York State Council on Divorce Mediation http://nysmediate.org/ Divorce mediation is a voluntary, cooperative settlement process in which a neutral professional helps you make practical, informed decisions to resolve your differences. It is used frequently and successfully by separating and divorcing couples who want to plan their futures rationally, in an atmosphere of cooperation and mutual respect. With the guidance of a trained mediator, you work together through a series of or-

derly steps to create a fair and reasonable agreement. Visit their web site to find accredited mediators in your area, or call 516-227-2595.

DRUG & ALCOHOL ABUSE n Partnership for Drug-Free Kids Get Help via text, email or by scheduling a call with their trained specialists by visiting www.drugfree.org.

Drug use remains a significant problem in the United States, however adolescent drug use is particularly damaging as such use can affect the physical and mental development of younger people and can impact their opportunities later in life. In 2018, approximately 30.4 percent of those in school grades 8, 10, and 12 had used illicit drugs at some point in their lives. More than 67,000 people died from drug overdoses in 2018, making it a leading cause of injury-related death in the United States. For the first time in history, a person is more likely to die from an accidental opioid overdose than from a motor vehicle crash.

This national organization helps parents take effective action before their child’s drug use or drinking reaches a point where treatment is required. Research has shown that substance abuse problems can be reduced by intervening early. Encouraging parents to take immediate action is therefore a main goal of the helpline’s team of parent support specialists who offer expert advice to help parents plan a course of action and can supply a list of local resources or treatment facilities.

Their website is an excellent one-stop resource where you can educate yourself about specific drugs, teen behavior, and ways to talk to your kids to prevent abuse from ever happening in the first place. n UNDERAGE DRINKING TIPLINE 1-800-851-1932 Erie County Sheriff’s Office anonymous, confidential, and free hotline. Concerned adults, teachers, students and friends now have a number to call 24 hours a day, to report planned underage drinking parties; underage drinking parties taking place or other activities that may be harmful to the health, safety and welfare of young people.

FOOD ALLERGIC FAMILIES n Greater Buffalo Food Allergy Alliance www.gbfoodallergy.org The mission of this local support group is to share information, tips, and experiences to ease the challenges of living with food allergies, as well as raise the awareness in the community; meets at the Orchard Park Library, 4570 South Buffalo St., Orchard Park. You can find more details on their website or Facebook page.

KINSHIP CAREGIVERS

Among the many changes in society today is the growing incidence of grandparents raising their grandchildren, or other relatives or family friends taking on the primary role or raising a child in the absence of biological parents.

Check with your church, your town’s senior services center, or your county’s mental health association for currently active support groups or counseling services. Here are several area resources: n Catholic Charities of Buffalo Kinship Preventive Services 412 Niagara St., Buffalo, NY 14201 Contact: Emily Mehltretter 716- 854-3622 A specialized unit serving families involved with the Child Welfare system with kinship placements, that is, children being cared for by a relative in Erie County. n Child & Family Services 330 Delaware Ave., Buffalo, NY 14202 716-842-2750 www.cfsbny.org Child and Family Services’ Residential Program has the capacity to serve 46 children in four different programs.

Their staff provides treatment in smallgroup settings to help children and families overcome the obstacles and traumatic experiences that prevent them from living at home. Through dedicated care, treatment, and supervision, children and families learn the skills needed to prepare for discharge back home or to another type of residence. n Gateway-Longview, Inc. KinCARES Family Support Program 716-783-3100 ext. 3181 www.gateway-longview.org

KinCARES is a voluntary support service that helps the growing number of families who step forward to care for their kin full-time. A caseworker helps you navigate legal support & resources, permanency & long-term options for the child(ren), mentoring and skill-building, parenting skills, school advocacy, mental health & substance abuse resources and more. Services are available for families within Erie County and are offered at no cost to relatives providing care for TANF-eligible (Temporary Assistance for Needy Families) children. n KFACT: Kinship Families and Children Together Berkshire Farm Center & Services for Youth 975 Hertel Ave., Buffalo, NY 14216 716-462-1722 KFACT will provide preventive services to bolster kinship family funcitoning, prevent placement, or achieve a quicker, successful permanency for those in formal care. n Grandparents Advocating Support Program Inc. (GASP) 716-204-8677 www.grandparentsadvocating supportprogram.com GASP has been in existence since 1995 in Niagara County NY. GASP services Erie and Niagara Counties with support meetings, educational seminars, case management, legal guidance, supervised visitations and safe exchanges, assistance with back to school and holidays. n Non-Parent Caregivers: NY State & Erie County Department of Social Services Programs Non-parent caregivers — grandparents, other relatives, friends — who are caring for children without a parent living in their home, may be eligible for Temporary Assistance.

Temporary Assistance for children not living with a parent is often referred to as “non-parent caregiver” or “child-only” grants, and includes Medical Assistance (MA). If the non-parent caregiver wants assistance only for the children, the non-parent caregiver’s income is not used to determine eligibility and there are no Temporary Assistance work requirements for the non-parent caregiver. Non-parent caregivers may apply for temporary assistance at their local social services office.

In addition to financial assistance, nonparent caregivers (also called kinship caregivers) often have a need for information and assistance related to food stamps, the Home Energy Assistance

MY FAMILY Program (HEAP), custody, guardianship, foster care, adoption, schooling, school enrollment, and other forms of assistance such as child care, social security, respite, case management and service programs.

For information about services and assistance programs visit: www.nysnavigator.org - The NYS Kinship Navigator’s website offers legal fact sheets, state and local kinship resources, and other information. In addition, the Navigator operates a 24 hour toll free phone line at 1-877-454- 6463.

LEAD POISONING SERVICES

counseling, breastfeeding support, prenatal and postpartum support, referrals and supplemental food vouchers. All of our services are free of charge.

WIC is for all kinds of families - married or single parents, working or not working. Fathers, mothers, grandparents, foster parents or other legal guardians of a child under five can apply for the child to receive WIC. WIC does not require US citizenship, social security number, green card or legal residency to receive benefits.

Catholic Charities operates the program locally through a variety of locations. To reach any of the sites serving Chautauqua, Erie and Niagara counties, call (716) 218-1484. Not all of their locations are open every day, please call for site schedules.

You may be eligible for WIC if you: • Are pregnant, breastfeeding or post-partum, OR • Have an infant or child under 5 years old, AND • Receive SNAP (Food Stamps), Temporary Assistance (TANF) or Medicaid or meet the income guidelines below, AND • Live in New York State

n Lead Poisoning Prevention Resource Center of WNY 716-768-7624 The center serves eight counties in WNY and was established in 1993. It currently operates through Children’s Hospital and Niagara Street Pediatrics.

You can also call NY State’s Growing Up Healthy Hotline toll-free at 1-800-522-5006 for further information about eligibility, etc.

MISSING PERSONS

Moms, we know how it is. We manage the house, the schedules, the lunch packing and dinner making. We’re there for homework, the big game, the school play, and we make it happen with a smile. Where’s that little dose of “me” time? Thankfully, there are some helpful organizations in our community just for moms. Whether you’re a new mom or a veteran mom, there’s a special place for you to connect, refresh and relax.

n New York State Division of Criminal Justice Missing Persons Clearinghouse 1-800-346-3543 or 1-800-FIND-KID Call local law enforcement first to report a missing child or adult. Call the hotline for case intake or to provide lead information. Electronically distributes missing child or missing college student alerts statewide and assists in investigation.

NUTRITION ASSISTANCE n WIC - Women, Infants & Children https://www.ccwny.org/wic Women, Infants & Children (WIC) is a federal nutrition program that supports pregnant, postpartum, and breastfeeding women, infants and children up to the age of five to live a healthier life.

WIC provides nutrition education and

PARENT ORGANIZATIONS

n MOMS Club www.momsclub.org The MOMS Club is an international non-profit organization, started by a California mom. Several local chapters have formed which offer monthly meetings with speakers and discussions, park play dates, holiday family parties, outings for mothers and their children, and activity groups like playgroups, arts – continued next page

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 Parenting Resources  Parenting Resources  Parenting Resources  ‘n crafts, and a monthly MOMS Night Out. They also do community service projects. Find a local chapter through their web site. n WNY Mothers Of Multiples formerly Mothers of Twins Club of Buffalo www.wnymultiples.org This support group for expectant and current mothers of twins (and more!) meets on the 2nd Wednesday of most months at 7pm at Good Shepherd Lutheran Church, 2669 Sheridan Drive, Tonawanda. In addition to their meetings which feature “meet and mingle” sessions, they organize activities such as moms’ nights out, toy/clothing sales, and a great vareity of other momoriented and family events. Download membership forms on their website.

Faith Lutheran Church 1230 Bowen Rd., Elma 3rd Tuesday of the Month; 6:30pm Lockport Alliance Church 555 Davison Rd., Lockport 1st & 3rd Wed.; 9:30-11:15am The Tabernacle 3210 Southwestern Blvd., Orchard Park 2nd & 4th Wed.; 9:30-11:30am Watermark Wesleyan Church 4999 McKinley Pkwy, Hamburg 2 Fridays a month; 9:15am-11:45am n MOMSNEXT is a relatively new type of group, created by MOPS International for mothers of school-age children. You can check for a program in your area at www.mops.org. Here are some examples: Fellowship Wesleyan Church MOMSnext meets every 1st & 3rd Monday of the month at 6:15pm, beginning in September, at 1645 Southwestern Blvd., West Seneca.

Zion Lutheran Church MOMSnext meets every 1st & 3rd Tuesday from 6:30-8:15pm, at 9535 Clarence Center Rd., Clarence Center.

n Mothers of Preschoolers (MOPS) www.mops.org MOPS is an international organization for pregnant women and moms of infants through pre-schoolers. MOPS meetings give moms and moms-to-be the opportunity to meet other moms and share the journey of motherhood. Here is a sampling of Western New York groups. A complete listing is available on the MOPS web site.

Amherst Alliance Church 3915 Millersport Hwy., Amherst 2nd & 4th Thurs.; 9:30-11:30am Resurrection Life 2145 Old Union Rd., Cheektowaga 1st & 3rd Thurs.; 9:30-11:30am Fellowship Wesleyan Church 1645 Southwestern Blvd., West Seneca 1st & 3rd Mondays (Sept-May); 6:15pm-8:15pm Winchester Community Church 909 Harlem Rd., West Seneca 1st & 3rd Thurs., 6:30pm-8pm Zion Lutheran Church 9535 Clarence Center Rd., Clarence Ctr. 1st & 3rd Wed.; 9:30-11:15am

The Tabernacle MOMSnext meets the 2nd & 4th Wednesday, 9:30am11:30am, at 3210 Southwestern Blvd., Orchard Park. Call 716-675-2888.

Watermark Wesleyan MOMSnext meets at 4999 McKinley Pkwy., Hamburg. Get in touch for schedule.

POISON EMERGENCY n Upstate New York Poison Center 24 Hours A Day, 365 Days A Year 1-800-222-1222 http://www.upstate.edu/poison/ Calls are answered by Specialists in Poison Information (SPIs), registered nurses, and pharmacists trained in toxicology. Specialists provide the most efficient and up-to-date poison information available.

Physicians and toxicologists are on-call 24 hours a day for consultation purposes.

SPECIAL NEEDS For a complete listing of special needs organizations, visit the DD Info Link at http://www.211wny.org/search/ ddinfolink/ which provides a multitude

of resources related to developmental disabilities. The resources can be broken down by age group, and then by service types, such as daily living, education, in-home services, recreation, respite and more. If you do not have access to the Internet, call 1-888-696-9211. n Parent Network of WNY 1000 Main Street Buffalo, New York 14202 Information & Referral: 716-332-4170 www.parentnetworkwny.org This community resource provides all the tools necessary for parents and professionals to take an active role in the education of children and young adults with special needs. They offer a wealth of seminars, workshops, information and referral services, a newsletter, family training services, all FREE of charge. If you’ve struggled to find the right services for your child, or are lost in the maze of rules and regulations in the Special Education System, these are the folks who can help.

The next Family Resource Guide will appear in our October issue. n Down Syndrome Parents Group of Western New York 716-832-9334 www.dspgwny.org Provides support to persons with Down Syndrome and their families through information on educational programs and community services. A Parent Support Program connects new parents with volunteers who can share their experiences and provide support. A phone call, hospital or home visit is available upon request by calling Barbara at 716983-2140. They host activities throughout the year. n Support Group for Parents of Children with Autism 7 Community Drive (Aspire), Cheektowaga www.wchob.org/autism Provides a welcoming environment for parents and other caregivers of children with autism spectrum disorders to meet, share experiences, ask questions, and receive support. The groups meets once a month, 6:30pm-8:30pm. Contact Jana Mertz, jmertz@kaleidahealth.org or call 716-323-6435.

A Niagara County group meets in Niagara Falls. To learn more, call 716-408-2589 or email ecdc@kaleidahealth.org.

Healthy

WNY Family Magazin

Healthy Child, Family e • July 2020

20th Annual

AT THE END OF YOUR ROPE?

n Family Help Center (formerly Joan A. Male Family Support Center) 24-Hour Parent Help Line 716-892-2172 www.familyhelpcenter.net Did you ever get the feeling that being a parent is a bigger job than you expected? The stress continues every day! Raising a family is a big job and sometimes it’s an overwhelming one!

Since 1973, the Family Help Center has been providing services to families raising children and gives the support you can’t always get from family, neighbors, or even parents. They operate the only 24-hour, 365 day a year family crisis intervention and support service in Erie County, and offer immediate assistance with no application procedures, no eligibility requirements, and no waiting period. They provide in-home support services to all of Erie County, as well as a NY State licensed daycare facility. Their Family Help Center Daycare, at 60 Dingens St., Buffalo, offers full day, before, and after school care, and school-age summer programs. n Crisis Services Serving Buffalo & Erie County www.crisisservices.org 24-Hour Crisis Hotline: 716-834-3131 24-hour Addiction Hotline: 716-831-7007 24-Hour Erie County Domestic Violence Hotline: 716-862-HELP For Shelter: 716-884-6000 Provides crisis intervention and supportive counseling to all callers in Erie County. Provides immediate assistance for people who are in acute emotional distress; who are or perceive themselves to be in life-threatening situations; who are a danger to themselves or to others; or who are hysterical, frightened or otherwise unable to cope with a problem that requires immediate attention. n Crisis Services Kids Helpline: 716-834-1144 The Kids helpline is a part of the Crisis Services Counseling Program and is dedicated to serving school aged children, adolescents and parents by providing immediate and confidential support 24 hours a day, on a variety of issues related to youth and their families.

21ST ANNUAL!

healthy CHILD, healthy FAMILY

July 2020 WNY Family 17

A Special Pull-Out Section

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Join us in educating local parents about how they can improve their family’s health.

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 Parenting Resources  Parenting Resources  Parenting Resources 

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It’s As Easy As

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PARENT PREVIEWS –

Making Media Entertainment An Easier Choice For Families

The Call of the Wild PG OVERALL RATING:

B

20TH CENTURY STUDIOS Released on DVD: May 12, 2020

“

I

VIOLENCE: (C-) A dog is kidnapped, locked in a crate without food and water, and shipped thousands of miles. There are multiple scenes of animal abuse: a dog is beaten with a club, dogs are whipped and treated with cruelty. Dogs chase and catch a rabbit; they let it go but another dog kills it. There is an extended dogfight scene, involving dogs biting and throwing one another. There are moments of extreme peril, including a scene where a person and dog fall through the ice and one where dogs race to evade an avalanche. A secondary character points a gun at several dogs in one scene. It is implied that these dogs later died. A man walks up to another man and punches and kicks him. A person insists that a dog be put down. A man is thrown out the door and into the snow. A character breaks into someone else’s cabin and damages objects. A bear roars at a dog on several occasions. A wolf snaps at a dog but does not harm him. A wolf falls into a fast-flowing river but is rescued. A man is shot at, upsets his lantern, and accidentally starts a fire. Two men have a fistfight. A man is shot and killed; small amount of blood shown.

SEXUAL CONTENT: (A­) None noted.

LANGUAGE: (A-) One mild curse word is heard in one scene.

ALCOHOL / DRUG USE: (C)­­ A main character drinks frequently and heavily in order to cope with bereavement. The alcohol use is not portrayed in a positive light.

s there any house big enough to hold him?”

Buck is massive St. Bernard/Scotch Collie with a loyal heart, expressive eyes, and prodigious amounts of energy that can’t be contained in his sedate California home.

His mischief-making career abruptly ends one night when he is dog-napped, sealed in a wooden crate, and shipped thousands of miles without food or water. Upon arrival in the far North, Buck is brutalized, subdued, and sold as a sled dog to deliver the mail to prospectors in Yukon Territory. Buck’s heart is as resilient as he is strong, and he soon embarks with gusto on this second phase of his life. And, then, on the third…

The Call of the Wild carries a number of themes that will interest parents, and grit is doubtless one of them. Buck is a poster boy for emotional resilience, bouncing back from everything life throws at him. But John Thornton (a scraggly, bearded Harrison Ford), running from the demons of his past and trying to drown them in alcohol, demonstrates that for some of us, resilience is more of a journey than a hardwired personality trait.

The primary messages of this film, not surprisingly, center on man’s relationship to nature. The most obvious is our responsibility to animals. There are scenes where Buck (and sometimes other dogs) are beaten, whipped, starved, or have guns pointed at them. The bigger theme is never articulated but is embedded in the location of the film. Set in Canada’s Yukon Territory, this movie is shot in the Yukon and British Columbia. Soaring, snow-capped mountains, meadows filled with wildflowers, sparkling rivers… this movie is a dream come true for anyone promoting tourism in the far North. It’s also a reminder of how beautiful

For additional information on this film’s content, visit www.parentpreviews.com

peril. The death of a character could upset sensitive viewers, like the little girl a few seats away from me who was audibly sobbing in the theater.

But for most family viewers, Buck’s adventures will help deepen our appreciation of the beautiful planet we call home and might even help us hear the call of the wild places that still remain.

TALK ABOUT THE MOVIE WITH YOUR FAMILY…

and fragile our world is.

Despite its powerful messages, The Call of the Wild comes with some negatives, none more glaring than the CGI dogs. I’m not sure why director Chris Sanders chose to use a computer-generated canine; perhaps he didn’t want the trouble of using live animals on set, maybe he thought it was kinder to animals.

Whatever the reason, the result is uncomfortable to watch. Real dogs look and act like dogs, even when they’ve been trained to do tricks.

Animated dogs are obviously not real and can believably talk, emote, or act like humans.

But the CGI dogs in this movie try to mix and match, combining realistic looking canine bodies with eerily human facial expressions.

For parents who aren’t troubled by the movie’s CGI, the only real areas of concern are alcohol use and violence. John Thornton is a problem drinker, using liquor to numb the pain of his past. The bigger content problem is related to violence — human on animal, animal on animal, and human on human. None of the violence is gratuitous or gory and all of it advances the plot, but there are scenes of animal abuse or fistfights and moments of extreme

The scenes of Buck and other dogs being beaten and whipped are very upsetting. Are you interested in helping protect animals from abuse? What kind of groups exist in your area to help animals?

The Call of the Wild was filmed in Canada’s far North. The Arctic region is more vulnerable than most parts of the world to the effects of climate change. Are you familiar with the dangers the changing climate poses to these vulnerable areas? What can you do to ameliorate the effects of climate change?

WATCH AT HOME… For another film based on a Jack London novel, check out White Fang. In this story, a boy befriends a wolf dog who helps him with his quest to find gold in the Yukon. Alpha features another bond between a boy and his dog (or wolf), but this one is set in prehistoric times.

Sled dogs star in a tale of adventure and courage in The Great Alaskan Race. In this tale, sled dogs carry mushers across the frozen wilderness to bring medicine to children suffering from diphtheria. Eight Below also features sled dogs, but this pack has been abandoned when their human owner leaves them in a medical emergency.

May 2020 WNY Family 39

topple to the ground in the augmented reality-based game. Start by using your camera to determine the real world location of the assault. Then, players use their fingers to pull back and aim the tanks and launch their projectiles. You will have to physically move around to see behind buildings or around trees.

You can easily blow an afternoon playing alone or against a friend. The app is only available on Apple devices, but there are similar versions available for Android devices as well.

RAISING DIGITAL KIDS — by Mike Daugherty

Looking for an Escape

A

s I am wrapping up the final edits of this column, the President announced an extension of the “stay at home” order until May 15th. Depending on when you are reading this and how the COVID-19 virus has spread, we could soon be allowed to leave our homes, or we could be looking at another few days or even another few months of social distancing and life in quarantine. We could all use a much-needed escape from reality.

I can’t provide you a flight to a tropical, COVID-free island.

I can offer up some technology to enhance the reality we are continuing to deal with — augmented reality. Virtual reality and augmented reality have some similarities, but they are unique in their own right.

Virtual reality (VR) is something that occurs entirely in a digital space. VR requires a headset or glasses to display a scene, room, or world that has been generated by a computer. Augmented reality (AR) takes a different approach.

AR is a technology-enhanced version of reality. A computer 40 WNY Family May 2020

uses specialized software and a camera to superimpose images onto the real world. We’re going to be looking at apps for your smartphone or tablet that might offer an escape for a few hours through the power of augmented reality.

Crayola Color Alive - Your children may have found a new love of coloring and drawing during the stay at home order. Crayola’s Color Alive series takes coloring to a whole new level. Kids start by coloring a picture of their favorite superhero, princess, magical animal, etc. Next, Crayola brings the image to life through augmented reality through the Color Alive app. There are a few downloadable pages on Crayola’s site, but you’ll need to purchase a coloring book from their website if your kids want more than what is available for free.

Smash Tanks Smash Tanks brings a fictional tank battle to your kitchen table, in your backyard, or the middle of your living room floor. Missiles fly, and buildings

Angry Birds AR: Isle of Pigs - The wildly successful Angry Birds franchise is back again. The game mechanics have not changed much. You’re still launching birds into various structures covered in little green piggies. In this installment, though, the game t a k e s place in the real world. You look around your physical location using your phone’s camera to place each level. With the level set, a bird is loaded into your virtual slingshot, and you pull back with your finger to release it. The augmented reality allows you to move around the structure and shoot the feathered missiles from any side or angle that you wish. The twist on this mobile favorite makes Angry Birds AR: Isle of Pigs worth the download.

Ikea Place - Augmented Reality can be used for far more than just playing games, though. The Ikea Place app allows you to place virtual exact to scale furniture in your house to see how it would look. For example, you can place a virtual loveseat in your existing living room to determine if it matches your vi-

sion for the room. The tablet or smartphone app lets you move the furniture around the room in real-time. Designers (that’s you) can add multiple items at once, such as a lamp, end table, and sofa. You can easily spend a few hours browsing the IKEA collections, placing pieces, and reimagining your whole house. The app is free and works for both Apple and Android, so there’s no reason not to give it a try. Houzz is a similar app for interior design that does not rely on just IKEA’s catalog of home goods.

Wanna Kicks – This app is much like IKEA Place or Houzz, but for your feet. Wanna Kicks lets you see your feet in a pair of sneakers.

You choose the brand and the colors.

Next, hold your feet out in front of your smartphone’s camera, and the app will place the shoes on your feet.

You cannot get a sense of how they feel to walk in, but you will be able to see if you like the way they look.

If you are more into tattoos than shoes, you can check out InkHunter.

It offers the same options as Wanna Kicks, but for tattoos.

Holo – This app takes a different approach to augmented reality.

Holo lets you add holograms of real people and animals into the world around you. You can then take photos & videos to share with friends. Similar to other AR apps, once you place a hologram into the world, you can walk around and see it from all angles as if it was standing in the room with you. Characters are life-sized, but you have the option of enlarging or shrinking them with your thumbs. The app includes dogs, a man in a gorilla costume, Einstein, and some social media personalities. A word of caution... not all the holograms are appropriate for children.

I hope the apps listed above provide you and your children a bit of excitement and a break from the boredom. Stay healthy. Stay safe.

Mike Daugherty is a husband, father of three young children, author, speaker, Google Innovator, and possible Starbucks addict. He is a certified educational technology leader who has served in a variety of roles through his eighteen-year career in public education. Currently, Mike is the Director of Technology for the Chagrin Falls Exempted Village School district in Northeast Ohio. As an IT director he has developed creative, well thought out solutions that positively impact teaching and learning.

May 2020 WNY Family 41

PICK OF THE LITERATURE — by Dr. Donna Phillips

“It was the best of times, it was the worst of times, it was the age of wisdom, it was the age of foolishness, it was the epoch of belief, it was the epoch of incredulity, it was the season of Light, it was the season of Darkness, it was the spring of hope, it was the winter of despair, we had everything before us, we had nothing before us…”

— A Tale of Two Cities, Charles Dickens

I

f this sounds familiar and feels familiar you are not alone. As we have watched our country and the world spiral out of control, who would ever have though it would come to an apex in this fashion? Short of an asteroid hitting the earth sending us all the way of the dinosaurs, we are lucky. Whoever would have thought that we would be rethinking how we work, interact with our family, friends, and others, and live our lives? While it has made us aware of the blessings of those in medicine, healthcare, and research, the innovations in technology, the dedication and honor of those in emergency services, the goodness of the common man, and the kindness of strangers, it has also made us aware of our vulnerabilities. How we get through this will depend on many things, but it is the virtues of those around us that will make the biggest difference.

But where do these virtues come from and where did they begin? Most likely in the home with family, and with the sacrifices, dedication, and the role models that show children how to BE… And how do we teach this? In the way we speak, behave, allocate time, interact, and what we value.

We are now, more than ever, being watched by our children to see how we demonstrate Hemmingway’s famous motto, “Courage is grace under fire.” These are lessons that cannot be taught in school, online, or by social 42 WNY Family May 2020

media. But how can we do this? One way is through reading with and to each other.

This is the time to live Jim Trelease’s lessons on the benefits of reading with children. In his landmark book, The Read Aloud Handbook (Penguin Publishing Group, New York, 2019, $19.99), now in its 8th edition and published in multiple languages, Trelease presents the research, benefits, and practices… in essence the roadmap for reading with children. In his book he also provides a collection of the “best of the best” of books to read. Considering our current situation, here are some books that you might consider for your family to help everyone through these difficult times.

Books for Children & Parents Shalom Bayit: A Peaceful Home (Kar-Ben, Minneapolis, 2020, $6.99), written by Linda Elovitz and illustrated

by Ag Jatkowska, is a lovely board book for young children that takes us on a walk through the forest, visiting the homes of the animals and savoring the peace there.

Just like a walk in the woods that can refresh, calm, and reset us, this book does much the same, returning us at the end to “a quiet place, a peaceful home.” This book would be great to share before or after a visit to the forest or perhaps even while you are there.

Kindness Makes Us Strong (Dial Books for Young Readers, New York, 2019, $11.99), written and illustrated by Sophie Beer, is another board book that is a wonderful reminder of ways that we can be kind to those around us. Now that we are spending more time together, this may be just what we need as we try to practice patience and compassion in close quarters. In the end this practice will certainly serve to make us stronger as individuals, families, communities, and as a nation.

There can be no doubt that the unusual circumstances, lack of routine, upheaval in socializing, and the barrage of bad news, coupled with parental worry and stress is not helping our children (or us). If you have a child who is sensitive to these stressors, Ruby Finds a Worry (Bloomsbury Children’s Books, New York, 2019, $17.99), written and illustrated by Tom Percival, is the imaginative story of Ruby who discovers a small worry one day as she is playing in the garden. As her day progresses, her worry grows bigger and bigger every time she pays attention to it. Soon it takes over her space and her happiness. She stops doing the things she loves to do and feels like she will never be happy again. This goes on for weeks until one day she notices a young boy sitting alone and dejected on a park bench and they begin to talk. Soon she realizes she is not alone in her worries and the more they talk, the more her worry begins to shrink.

Before she knows it, her worry has disappeared and she has a new friend. They learn to work together and soon discover the less attention you give your worries… the sooner they leave!

It is important to help our children realize that the world is still full of wonderful possibilities. Sometimes it just takes a few minutes to pause, breath, and notice all of the opportunities that are around

them. A World of Pausabilities (Magination Press, Wa s h i n g t o n , 2017, $15.95), written by Frank I. Sileo and illustrated by Jennifer Zivion, takes us on a journey of the ways we can learn to slow down and savor each moment of our day. It shows us how we can combine this awareness and mindfulness to help us pause… stop… notice… feel… think… and do. Once we are calm, grounded, and reset we can continue on our journey. The end of this book provides parents and caregivers more information on how to turn this book into activities from which everyone can learn and enjoy.

Get up! Get Out! Get moving!!! If there is one thing we can learn from this crisis, it is the power of physical activity to clear, calm, focus, and reinvigorate our mind, body, and spirits. Christopher Willard and Daniel Rechtschaffen have written the perfect book for you and your family to get moving again! Alphabreaths: The ABC’s of Mindful Breathing (Sounds True, Boulder, 2019), illustrated by Holly Clifton-Brown, provides 26 breathing activities (organized by the alphabet) to help children practice ways to calm their breath and calm their mind and emotions. These simple mindful movements can be done indoors or outdoors, standing or sitting, some even riding in the car, walking or riding a bike! The intention of these is to make us all more aware of our surroundings and what is going on inside and outside of us. As we practice the different ways of breathing and thinking,

we find ourselves relaxing and releasing.

We begin to look around us and within us with new eyes and a new perspective… just what we have needed for a long time.

Perhaps this is one of the unexpected blessings of this “spring of hope” during our “winter of despair.”

Some Favorites If you are looking for books to help you support and guide your children through the coming days, here is a list of some of my favorites.

Sitting Still Like a Frog: Mindfulness Exercise for Kids (Shambala Publications, Boulder, 2013, $17.95) by Eline Snel is a little book that is the perfect introduction to mindfulness for parents and children. Activities and the explanations of their benefits for children and adults will help everyone calm down, get better sleep, alleviate worry, manage anger, and develop patience, awareness, and focus.

The CD that is included with this book has guided meditations that are perfect for the entire family.

Just Breathe: Meditation, Mindfulness Movement, and More (Running Press Kids, New York, 2018, $12.99), written by Mallika Chopra and illustrated b Brenna Vaughn, has activities for children to introduce them to the benefits and

practice of mindfulness. It also has chapters with ideas for working with the breath, movement, learning how to be silent and learning how to notice.

Common questions are answered in a separate chapter and the last chapter gives parents and children ideas on how to create spaces for healing, calming, and creating a vision of how life can be lived with joy, compassion, and kindness for self and others.

Be Mindful & Stress Less (Shambala Publications, Boulder, 2013, $14.95)

by Gina M. Biegel provides “50 ways to deal with your (crazy) life.” Each practice is simply outlined with brief explanations, steps, and benefits. Part One: PAWS – Pay Attention With Senses; Part Two: Self Care – Self-Compassion, SelfAcceptance, Self-Respect, Self-Esteem; Part Three: ACORN – Always Consider Others Responses Now all suggest specific “fast, simple, accessible mindfulnessbased practices that will help bring you relief and ease right away to help you get through your toughest days.” This is an excellent quick go-to manual for you and your family.

Our unexpected turn of events and the resulting abrupt awareness that has caught our attention has seen everyone reassessing how they have been living, thinking, and behaving. It does seem that history repeats itself, but in the meantime… create a “new normal.” It is the time to reset how we move through life physically, mentally, and emotionally. Hopefully these resources will help you and your family do so.

May 2020 WNY Family 43

Daughter

& d a D

Dcuns

by Patrick and J.L. Hempfing

Living Vicariously

V

icariously.

This is not a word I use often. When I hear this word, I think of one thing — parents living vicariously through their children.

Most of us would agree this is not a great idea, but we do it anyway.

As a big tennis fan, I couldn’t wait for Jessie to pick up a tennis racquet. At two weeks old — yes, two weeks — Jessie was holding a miniature tennis racquet, with a little assistance from Dad. At six weeks, I converted a beach play set into a tennis practice facility by replacing a stuffed, dangling sea horse with a tennis-ball lamp pull. A little creativity and Velcro and it worked like a charm. I can still remember my exuberance as I watched Jessie hit the tiny tennis ball with her miniature tennis racquet. It’s never too early to practice hand-eye coordination.

Even though I knew Jessie was going to be a tennis player, dominating the mixed-doubles daddy-daughter circuit, my wife and I introduced Jessie to all kinds of activities — basketball, soccer, archery, swimming, volleyball, softball, and my wife’s favorite — the beach. But deep down, I was confident Jessie would come back to Dad’s, err, I mean Jessie’s, first passion — tennis. Our future would be filled with quality time together on the courts and we’d win numerous tennis trophies, of course.

Then Jessie asked to take dance lessons. I was fine with this, as all sports require good balance, something ballet would provide. It’s time to get Jessie’s perspective.

44 WNY Family May 2020

Jessie, Age 12

Pointe Shoes: Years of training, practicing technique, and gaining strength lead up to this. Nope, these were definitely not the thoughts that were going through Dad’s mind as he told the shop owner helping me with my first pair of pointe shoes that I would have been better off playing tennis. Dad winced as the man fitting my pointe shoes told my dad the consequences of taking pointe.

“We’re looking for the pair that is the least uncomfortable. Feet weren’t meant to do this. We’re smashing her toes into a box. We’re looking for the shoes that will damage her feet the least.”

I have danced for five years. (This year is my sixth.) I have pushed myself to be a better dancer. I was excited to learn at the end of last dance year that I made it on pointe. I eventually did find a pair of pointe shoes I can wear, and Mom sewed the ribbons on them.

Pointe classes started a few weeks ago and they are going well. I can’t say it’s the most comfortable thing I’ve ever tried, but it’s ok, and I think it is making me a better dancer. I am glad that I have the opportunity to take these classes and think I will become more used to my feet being stuffed into a box. Now, let’s hear what Dad has to say.

What can dad say? I pictured myself taking Jessie shopping for high-performance tennis shoes. An hour-and-a-half pointe-shoe fitting isn’t my idea of a great time.

Hours of playing basketball, oneon-one, in the driveway. Games of PIG and Around the World.

Tossing softballs back and forth in the yard, chasing after the hundreds that missed their target. Tossing thousands of rubber balls on the roof of the house so Jessie could catch them in her ball glove when they bounced off. Batting practice in the front yard.

Tapping volleyballs back and forth, counting consecutive hits before the ball hit the ground.

Soccer and archery camps.

Swimming lessons.

Did I mention tennis lessons?

Out of all the activities Jessie could have pursued long-term, she chose to stick her pretty feet into a box that smashes her toes as she awkwardly tries to stand on the tips. Dad and daughter won’t be posing with tennis trophies any time soon.

The other night, though, as I stared through the window of Jessie’s dance class and watched her move across the floor with grace and beauty and a beaming smile on her face, it hit me. I’m living vicariously through Jessie — on the dance floor in pointe shoes!

Jessie is following her heart and enjoying life with zest and passion. She doesn’t need to have sneakers on her feet and a racquet in her hand. She’s loving life, which is exactly what we all should do with each day we’re granted.

But whether Jessie is spinning gracefully in her pointe shoes or hitting a tennis ball back to Dad (still hoping), one thing is certain ’tween daughter and dad, I love my girl and my girl loves me.

Until next month, remember to cherish the moments. To all the hard-working moms out there, Happy Mother’s Day! Patrick Hempfing had a 20-year professional career in banking, accounting, and auditing before he became a father at age 44. He is now a full-time husband, stay-at-home dad, and writer. Follow Patrick at http://patrickhempfing.com. J. L. Hempfing, now 15, began writing with her dad in kindergarten. Her current hobbies include playing clarinet, saxophone, and piano. She also enjoys marching in her high school band. If you enjoyed this column, you’ll like Patrick’s first book, “MoMENts: A Dad Holds On.” The book compiles favorite stories and new material and is available for sale on Amazon.

May 2020 WNY Family 45

DEAR TEACHER – by Peggy Gisler and Marge Eberts

Helping all parents make their children’s educational experience as successful as possible

How Successful Was Your Children’s School Year?

Q

uestion: It’s close to the end of the school year. How can I tell if my children really had a successful year? — Eye Opener Answer: Below you will see a few of the things that point to handling grade levels kindergarten through fifth successfully this past school year. Your children should have done the following in these grade levels: Kindergarten • Follow directions and rules.

• Be happy at school.

• Handle their personal needs, such as going to the bathroom.

• Play well with the other children.

• Learn to count to 100 by ones and by tens.

• Retell familiar stories with prompting.

Grade 1 • Been able to work independently.

• Write complete sentences with proper punctuation.

• Read on grade level.

• Add and subtract within 20.

• Solve problems using addition and subtraction.

Grade 2 • Read on grade level.

• Ask and answer who, what, when, where, why, and how to questions about a story.

• Spell common sight words.

• Solve addition and subtraction problems within 100.

Grade 3 • Read on grade level.

46 WNY Family May 2020

• Understand different types of sentences.

• Multiply and divide within 100.

• Solve problems using addition, subtraction, multiplication and division.

• Write a story with a beginning, middle, and end.

• Have the phonics skills to sound out words in context.

Grade 4 • Read and comprehend grade level stories.

• Understand subject-verb agreement.

• Possess a good reading, listening, and speaking vocabulary.

• Have an understanding of fraction equivalents and operations with fractions.

• Have an understanding of place value to 1,000,000.

• Draw inferences from text.

Grade 5 • Read complex text fluently and with good comprehension.

• Concentrate for long periods of time.

• Correctly use commas and quotation marks in writing.

• Be fluent with multi-digit addition, subtraction, multiplication, and division.

• Use problem-solving strategies to solve real-world math problems.

• Add and subtract fractions and decimals.

For more information on expectations for students, visit the Common Core website for math and English/language arts standards (http://www.nysed. gov/content/new-york-state-commoncore-learning-standards)

Is Seventh Grade the Right Time to Take Algebra?

Question: I am wondering when my son, who is currently completing sixth grade, should take algebra. He has been an A student in math. Should he take algebra in seventh grade? — Undecided Answer: Algebra has been called the gateway to learning higher math, and for years was taken in ninth grade. Then about 20 years ago, schools began offering it in eighth grade, which is now standard in many schools. If algebra is not taken in eighth grade, most students will not be able to take calculus their senior year in high school. Plus, they might not have sufficient math courses to take some AP science classes. Furthermore, many selective colleges do expect applicants to have taken calculus in high school. Now the bar has been dropped even lower, and students who meet certain predetermined standards can take algebra in seventh grade.

The president of the National Council of Teachers of Mathematics has expressed doubts about students taking algebra before eighth grade. She states that parents need to understand that for students in the middle grades to be successful in algebra they need to have the prerequisite mathematical understandings and skills, the tenacity to stick with a problem, and the willingness to spend more time on classwork and assignments. However, the most important prerequisite is having a level of maturity that includes a readiness to understand abstract mathematical concepts.

Taking algebra before a student has shown readiness for this course can be a recipe for disaster. Many students are not even ready until ninth grade. Parents need to think long and hard about their children’s readiness to take algebra in seventh grade and to consult their children’s math teachers.

Learning More about School Vouchers Question: What are school vouchers, and who is eligible to receive one?

— Lacking Knowledge Answer: Vouchers are sometimes called scholarships. A traditional voucher gives parents money to send their children to private schools. It is not usually sufficient to cover the complete cost of a private school. However, some private schools will not charge more than the voucher amount.

These vouchers are not available in all states, nor do all states allow them to be used in religiously affiliated schools.

Currently there are about 30 states and the District of Columbia with a student voucher program. Vouchers are a controversial education issue as they remove funding from public schools.

Vouchers offer families who cannot afford private school tuition with alternatives. Eligibility for a school voucher varies. Some states only offer them to students with disabilities, those from low-income families who meet certain income levels, or those who are zoned into attending failing schools.

Go to your state’s Department of Education’s website (http://www.nysed. gov/) to learn more about its voucher program, if it has one. These websites will give you a list of private schools participating in a voucher program, as well as provide the eligibility requirements and application deadlines.

Even with a voucher, private schools do not have to admit a child like a public school. Also, private schools do not usually provide as many accommodations for special needs students. Parents of these children definitely need to know what the state requires of private schools.

Parents should send questions and comments to dearteacher@dearteacher.com or to the Dear Teacher website.

F•A•C•T•S The History Behind Mother’s Day Early “Mother’s Day” in the US was mostly recognized by woman’s peace groups. An early activity was the meeting of groups of mothers whose sons had served or died on opposite sides of the American Civil War. There were local celebrations in the 1870s and the 1880s, but nothing to speak of on a state or national basis.

In 1868, Ann Jarvis created a committee to establish a “Mother’s Friendship Day” whose purpose was “to reunite families that had been divided during the Civil War,” and she wanted to expand it into an annual memorial for mothers, but she died in 1905 before the celebration became popular, later her daughter Anna Jarvis would continue her efforts.

Julia Howe, who had written The Battle Hymn of the Republic, organized a “Mother’s Day” antiwar observance in New York City on June 2nd, 1872. The observance continued in Boston for about 10 years under Howe’s personal sponsorship before losing momentum. It is rumored that she had hoped to convert July 4, America’s Independence Day into Mother’s Day, to dedicate that day to peace.

Several years later, a Mother’s Day observance was held in Albion, Michigan on May 13, 1877 over a dispute related to the Temperance movement. Later in the early 1880’s the Methodist Episcopal Church in Albion set aside the second Sunday in May to recognize the special contributions of mothers.

In 1904 Frank E. Hering of the Fraternal Order of Eagles, made the first recorded public plea for “a national day to honor mothers.” It was not until 1914 that President Woodrow Wilson signed the orders that made Mother’s Day a national holiday in the United States, due largely to the continued efforts of Anna Jarvis (daughter of Ann Jarvis). She asked that white carnations be the official Mother’s Day symbol.

May 2020 WNY Family 47

W

hen it comes to speech disorders, childhood apraxia of speech (CAS) is particularly tricky to diagnose. “There are so many reasons a child might not be talking,” says Rizza Miro Lemonakis, MA, CCC-SLP, a Marlton, NJ speech language pathologist. As such, this neurologicallybased disorder, which impedes coordination of the complex oral movements needed to produce speech, tends to be off many pediatricians’ radars.

— by Suzanne Koup-Larsen

 Putting emphasis on the wrong syllables  Difficulty making new word sounds or combinations  Difficulty sounds

imitating

By 2 or 3, if the child is not making a lot of sounds or sound combinations, seek a speech evaluation, recommends Martin.

“Early therapy is key,” agrees Miro Lemonakis.

Apraxia of Speech:

Conner’s Apraxia Story

Conner was not diLearn to identify a difficult agnosed with CAS until he was 4. From the age of childhood speech problem 3, he was running some“It is a disconwhere for therapy almost every day of nect between what your mind wants Empower Ability the week, as other issues necessitated to say and the muscles doing it,” exphysical, occupational, and viplains Miro Lemonakis. As a result, Inspire Advocate speech, sion therapies.

His family also tried kids struggle to make their mouths form sounds and words, despite the fact that there is no weakness in the muscles used for speaking.

Unlike articulation disorders, which are rule-based and consistent, “The most consistent thing about apraxia is that it’s inconsistent,” says Maria Unger, CCCSLP, a speech language pathologist at the TALK Institute in Newtown Square, PA, who describes CAS as an interruption in the brain’s speech motor plan. “It doesn’t follow rules and it doesn’t follow developmental sequence.”

Evan’s Apraxia Story “Evan wasn’t quiet, but he had no clear words,” remembers his mother Virginia, who first suspected a problem around the time he was 1 — the age flagged as a marker that something may be wrong by speech pathologist Loretta Martin, MS, CCC-SLP, of DuPont Pediatrics at Becks Woods in Bear, DE. It took a few years to finally get a definitive diagnosis, when Evan was 3 1/2. After 48 WNY Family May 2020

Special Needs Potential Thri

Growth Strategies

a few months of early intervention treatment, he really started talking by the age of 4. Now 5, Evan continues to receive speech therapy from his Marlton school district five days a week. “He’s not clear and still has a way to go,” Virginia says.

“But he’s made a huge improvement.”

One of the biggest indicators of apraxia is a growing gap between expressive language and receptive language as the child gets older, says Miro Lemonakis. Other signs of CAS are:  Groping: The mouth gropes for the right movement to form a word.  Vowel distortions

everything from nutritional therapies to chiropractor visits in an effort to help him speak. “We’ve tackled pretty much every approach possible,” reports mom Susan. “I wanted to look back and say I did everything I could.”

Now 11 years old and a 5th grader in a mainstream school in Haddon Heights, NJ, Conner is very clear and easy to understand speech-wise, Susan reports. She believes all those years of therapy paid off. “The more you get in early, when the brain is still developing, the more it helps later down the road,” she says.

There are no medications for CAS, so speech therapy is the primary treatment. “You can’t go to just any speech pathologist,” says Unger, so make sure it’s a qualified therapist with experience treating apraxia. Speech therapy is a long, laborious process for kids with CAS. “You have to teach them every step of the way,” says Martin.

Like Conner, kids with apraxia can succeed in mainstream schools, but

plenty of foundation work has to be in place first. “The goal is to get them to a point where they can be and keep up with their peers,” says Unger. Most kids with mild apraxia attend a regular classroom with supplemental therapy. In some cases, kids can use an augmentative system, such as sign language or an iPad, to help them communicate while they’re still learning to speak.

Moderate to severe apraxia can also affect reading, says Molly Miller, reading specialist and special education teacher at the TALK Institute. This is because the reading and speech parts of the brain overlap. Immediate retrieval of high-frequency words is difficult for apraxic kids. They also have issues with the normal rhythm and flow of words, says Miller.

“It is possible to speak fluently as an adult, but not everyone gets there,” says Martin. Kids with severe apraxia have a lifelong struggle with the disorder. But for those with mild to moderate apraxia, says Miro Lemonakis, after a couple years of therapy, “you might not know” there was ever a problem.

Apraxia & Autism Though they are distinct diagnoses, there appear to be some similarities between autism and childhood apraxia, and sometimes the disorders do overlap. “There is a connection,” says Miro Lemonakis, “but it goes only one way.” Children with autism have a higher likelihood of having apraxia, she says. But children with apraxia do not have a higher likelihood of having autism.

Speech-Delay Definitions Apraxia is a motor speech disorder, in which children have difficulty moving the muscles and structures necessary to form speech sounds to make spoken words.

Dyspraxia was formerly used interchangeably (though perhaps incorrectly) with apraxia. It isn’t used anymore in the speech field, says Unger.

Aphasia is a speech and language deficit caused by a neurological trauma, such as stroke or injury.

With a phonological disorder, kids drop or delete certain consonants. This is normal under age 3.

With a speech delay, speech follows a developmental continuum, but children meet the milestones late. Receptive language and expressive language development are close. But with apraxia, speech does not follow a developmental continuum.

There is a large gap between receptive language and expressive language.

Suzanne Koup-Larsen is a freelance writer whose work has appeared in MetroKids, New York Parenting, Washington Parent, and Sacramento Parent.

SUMMER IS ALMOST HERE!

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r me Sum 2020

In Print and Online!

! o G

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virtual activities while NY is on PAUSE? Advertise them to readers now, and let them know how they can visit you later this summer!

S, you may be entitled to a U PL COMPLIMENTARY E-BLAST

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Receive a FREE PROFILE when you reserve your ad.

Profile includes: Thumbnail picture, name, address, phone, website and 40 word description.

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May 2020 WNY Family 49

provide servers at a reasonable cost for customers with large orders. Money saver: Young teens in your neighborhood might be willing to work for “tips.”

TWEENS & TEENS — by Myrna Beth Haskell This column was written before the COVID-19 pandemic hit. While there’s no doubt high school seniors will be facing a very different end to 12th grade than they expected, under “normal” circumstances, graduation parties are often planned for late summer. Hopefully, we will have emerged from social distancing in plenty of time for you to use some of the ideas found here.

Pomp & Circumstance: Creative ways to celebrate your teen’s high school graduation without all the stress

W

ith my daughter’s graduation day looming, I couldn’t help but reminisce about my son’s big day two years prior.

Whether you intend to plan a big bash or celebrate in another way, take in every detail of this special day which symbolizes the infinite possibilities the future holds for your graduate.

We were so excited. Our firstborn child was about to begin a new chapter in his life, and we were prepared to celebrate in style. The big party would take place at our home a few hours after the ceremony’s conclusion. We were extremely organized and prepared. We set up the backyard the day before, and we decided to cater the event to save time and to avoid unnecessary stress.

Party Time Tips

After the ceremony, our proud family members and close friends packed into a half-dozen cars to head back home. I was chatting with my daughter’s godmother when she casually asked who took my daughter. Panic quickly set in because I had no idea. Fifteen minutes later, we found an exasperated, sixteenyear-old waiting impatiently at the entrance to an almost empty parking lot.

Even though I thought we had everything under control, the inevitable chaos of the occasion had caught up with us.

50 WNY Family May 2020

Parties can send the calmest of parents into a tailspin, so preparation is key.

Timing: If your party will be on graduation day, it is probably best to have it start several hours after the ceremony. You will have time to regroup or change your clothing. Options: Plan the party on a different weekend or host a “graduation eve” or “open house” gettogether.

Food: Unless you have relatives willing to prepare casseroles ahead of time, a catered event will ease the stress. Be sure to order at least a week in advance. Finger desserts served buffet style (in lieu of cutting a large cake) is a simple alternative. New trend: Partysize pizzas — simple and inexpensive.

Service: Consider hiring one or two servers, so you can enjoy the celebration. Sometimes restaurants will

Party Photos: Photo booths provide instant fun and party favors (takehome snapshots) for your guests. Other options: Ask party-goers to email their favorite shot after the event and make a photo collage for the thank you cards.

Solicit help from your younger kids who will likely enjoy taking random photos.

Create a poster-size collage of the best party photos for her dorm room wall.

Activities: Outdoor options might include volleyball, badminton, KanJam, cornhole, your own miniature golf game, water balloon toss, or tug of war.

If it rains, don’t fret. Plan activities that can be enjoyed indoors as well.

Guess the Teacher: Put teachers’ names on cards and tape them on graduates’ backs. Other guests offer clues until the graduates guess correctly.

Jar of M&Ms: Ask graduates to guess the number of M&Ms in their school colors. Winner takes home the jar.

Don’t Break the Bank: • Dual hosting: Share costs with another family.

• Print your own invitations.

• Skip the rentals: Borrow extra tables/chairs from neighbors.

• Borrow decorations from last year’s graduates.

• Bake cupcakes in lieu of ordering a cake: Decorate with tiny grad hats on toothpicks.

• Skip the DJ: Play party selections from an iPod hooked up to wireless speakers.

In Lieu of a Bash A party isn’t for everyone.

Some folks plan a special activity or trip to commemorate the occasion. Think outside the box: • For girls: Day at the spa • For guys: Several tickets (he’ll want to bring friends) to his favorite sporting event • Road trip to the graduate’s place of birth

• If available at your teen’s school, purchase a commemorative paver or plaque to be displayed for years to come

Lose the Stress

You want your teen to remember that you were all smiles on her graduation day, so be sure you address potential stress triggers.

“Graduation day marks a major life passage,” says Jean Fitzpatrick, LP, a marriage and individual therapist based in New York City. “It’s natural for parents to feel the pang of knowing that their child is growing up and becoming more independent. Focus on staying in the moment and enjoying the day’s events together,” she suggests.

Jeffrey Guterman, Ph.D., a Florida-based licensed mental health counselor and author of the best-selling book Mastering the Art of Solution-Focused Counseling, Second Edition (American Counseling Association, 2013), points out, “If parents are excessively stressed, it can help to encourage them to tap into their own natural effective coping skills. I encourage parents to think about what has worked effectively for them in the past when dealing with stressful situations.”

If you plan well, accept help when it’s offered, and focus on your teen, graduation day will garner a lifetime of precious memories. Just don’t forget the Kleenex!

TIPS & TALES “We had a taco food truck come for my daughter’s graduation party. Everyone loved it, and it was an easy cleanup!”

— Joan Larkin Bullock, Hopkinton, MA “We plan a graduation brunch.”

— Debbie Ciccone-Yaeger, Saugerties, NY “We had a backyard picnic in August when the June flurry of parties was well past. I made a massive quantity of pesto — easy to serve at room temperature. We kept it simple: salads and made-ahead desserts.”

— Wendy Urban Meade, Hyde Park, NY “Set up a ‘photo booth’. You can rent a set up but it would be pretty easy to DIY. All you need is a plain back drop, a camera on a tripod, consistent lighting under a tent, and lots of props/dress ups.”

— Victoria Ertman Kane, Hyde Park, NY “We went on a trip with a few of his friends.”

— Eileen Heller Sarter, Kennett Square, PA “I had parties for my kids in August. It gave me time to get ready over the summer, and it gave the kids an opportunity to get together before heading in different directions. Tip: Buy graduation party decorations in June since you can’t find them anymore in August.”

— Lynne Greenberg Schiffer, Hyde Park, NY

Myrna Beth Haskell is the author of “LIONS and TIGERS and TEENS: Expert advice and support for the conscientious parent just like you” (Unlimited Publishing, LLC). Her work has appeared in publications across the U.S. as well as internationally.

F•A•C•T•S How Mom Spends Her Time 39% of new moms change an average of 5.5 diapers per day 43% of new moms do an average of 4 loads of laundry per week 43% of new moms sleep only 5.5 hours per day 38% of new moms spend an average of 3 hours per day trying to feed their babies On average all moms spend 25 hours per week on paid work On average all moms spend 14 hours per week on child care On average all moms spend 18 hours per week on housework

Tech Is A Must For Mom

94% of moms own a smartphone 75% of moms own a tablet 29% own an Internet connected watch 32% of moms own a Bluetooth-enabled fitness tracker 39% own wireless earphones or headphones 90% of moms access the Internet from their cell phones 52% of smartphone moms have downloaded the Pandora music app Moms spend 3 hours 58 minutes using the Internet daily, 2 hours 24 minutes watching television, and 1 hour 31 minutes listening to radio.

Moms are spending 24 minutes daily using the Internet in 2019 than in 2018.

98% of moms have Internet access from any location 59% of moms of teens have learned about a streaming music service from their teenager 63% of moms who set an alarm to get up in the morning used a mobile device Only 56% of moms have ever listened to a podcast 76% of moms of teens agree that their teenagers assist them with new technology May 2020 WNY Family 51

SINGLE PARENTING — by Diane C. Dierks, LMFT

Parenting 2020 A Proactive Approach Part 1 of 3

T

he year was 1896. The automobile and camera were only about 10 years old and in their most primitive forms. Moving pictures were only a dream. Hot air balloons were the closest thing to air travel and steam-engine trains were considered “high speed” transportation. The industrial revolution beginning in the mid-1800s had changed the way people lived — they were no longer concentrated in the rural farmlands.

Women had not yet won the right to speak openly about politics, let alone vote for a presidential candidate. Small children were put to work in the factories to help the family afford a modest city apartment.

If you were unemployed, the local church and good friends might chip in to keep you alive.

Many people died from childhood diseases because of the lack of medical knowledge. Scores of adults died young because they could not afford health care.

People, in general, took nothing for granted. Every day was challenging, and they relished in their small successes when at the end of the day, stomachs were full and the fire was burning.

Now let’s look at this time period from the standpoint of how parents approached child-rearing. Most children had a limited number of influences in their lives. Their immediate family, neighbors and select acquaintances in the community comprised their frame of reference.

If they were fortunate enough to attend public school, they at least were able to learn about the “outside” world. If not, their world was the only world. Parents had a good idea who and what their children were exposed to on a daily basis. As you might imagine, teaching basic survival skills was a parent’s top priority.

As long as children could be raised to 52 WNY Family May 2020

respect hard work and sacrifice, they would have the skills necessary to earn a decent living. Knowing that the average life span at the time was only about 45-50 years, parents recognized the importance of teaching self-sufficiency early in a child’s life.

Moral issues were, for the most part, taught and enforced by the church, with a heavy dose of God-fearing sermons. Those outside the church still managed to teach simple basic values because they knew honesty, integrity, and upright behavior were the keys to keeping a good job and taking care of a family. Getting in trouble with the law or an employer meant losing jobs — being poor — there were no unemployment lines or welfare program alternatives.

Now let’s switch to the present. The year is 2020. Not only can our kids learn about the world with ease, they can interact with the world through numerous media alternatives including live television news broadcasts, the Internet, Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, and so on.

They can fly across the world in a few hours, make home videos with their smart phones, create graphic images with a few keyboard strokes, and sit in a chat or game room (in the privacy of their bedrooms) and talk with celebrities, educators, world leaders and shady characters.

Their parents are most likely working full-time, and preschool-age children spend their days with someone else’s parent. At least half of our children have experienced divorce and one-third are living with only one parent.

The manual labor children perform now is usually limited to cutting the lawn or doing the dishes, but even that’s put on the back burner because of soccer practices and mounds of homework.

Parents’ main goals in raising their

children today go far beyond teaching kids to survive. Most parents can only hope their kids will grow up to use all the interactive and fast-paced resources available to them in a positive way. Statistics prove, however, that these resources are more likely to give them an unrealistic view of human nature — making it cool to carry guns, have unprotected sex, and buy that nice new sports car with a plastic card.

A parent’s most daunting task is to teach kids how to use resources that parents themselves are not even sure how to use.

Progress has come so fast with so much vigor, that we are bombarded with much more than we can realistically process and translate to our kids in an intelligent manner — leaving us vulnerable, ignorant, and sometimes intimidated. The fact that nearly one-third of our children rely on only one parent to help them sort through the data makes the parental responsibilities going into the 2020s doubly intense.

There’s no question we have come a long way since 1896. We have more opportunity, but with that opportunity comes responsibility. We have more freedom, but with that comes the need for self-control.

We have longer life, but are challenged to sustain its quality. How do we do it? Our more complicated and gray world demands a more focused and flexible parenting approach.

The values we want to teach our kids are much the same as those our parents and grandparents tried to teach us. The difference is in the delivery. If you’re using the same techniques your parents did as recently as 20 years ago, you will most likely be ineffective. Our kids have more influences now that must be considered. We are forced to take a pro-active approach, where our parents probably took a reactive one.

We have to anticipate the affects the media (in any form) have on our children. We have to be prepared to say “no” when all the other parents are saying “yes.” Not an easy task, but definitely worthwhile. We’ll talk about specifics in Part II, coming next month.

Diane C. Dierks is a licensed marriage and family therapist in Atlanta, Georgia.

She is also author of The Co-Parent Toolbox (2014 Aha! Publishing) and Solo Parenting: Raising Strong & Happy Families (1997 Fairview Press). For more information visit her website is www.dianedierks.com.

T

hey say there are no dumb questions. They are wrong.

There are, in fact, many dumb questions. I know because I ask them more often than Kim Kardashian posts a selfie. In the spirit of conscious parenting and minimizing the urge to stab myself with a Lego, I’ve composed a list of dumb questions to stop asking my kids.

Why

Smart Parents

NEVER

Say These

8

Things

1) Are you ready to go?

Before asking this question, assess the situation. Are the child’s shoes on?

Has the child gone to the bathroom? (Alternatively: Is her diaper smuggling a wrecking ball?) Is the child already holding whatever toy, doll, or tchotchke she needs to bring? If not, save your breath and some aggravation. The child is not ready to go.

2) Can you wait a minute?

If you say this to someone who has no idea how long a minute is, prepare for the aftermath: A small voice will ask, “Has it been a minute?” approximately every 15 seconds until you lose your mind. Multiply the number of uninterrupted minutes required to complete whatever you were doing by 7,832. Plan to finish sometime next year.

— by Pam Moore is like asking your husband if he’d eaten the last of your chocolate stash. Skip your lame attempts to get a confession, grab the child, and change the diaper.

When they don’t, we remember children are just animals, acting on instinct. They probably have no clue why they did what they did.

5) Aren’t you hungry?

8) Do you know how late it is!?

Next time, try saying, “Not right now,” and then placing either the child or yourself in a locked, soundproof chamber where you or they will remain until your task is complete.

Never in the history of man has this question inspired a child to eat the meal his loving caregiver carefully prepared (or frantically threw together). If your child had an attorney, she’d accuse you of leading the witness and request the question be overruled. Kids don’t care how you’ll feel at the crack of ridiculous o’clock tomorrow morning when they’re STARVING. For miniature, enlightened yogis (a.k.a children), the only moment is right now. And right now, they’re not hungry.

3) Do you have to go to the bathroom?

6) Do you want to go to the store?

She might be emulating Michael Jackson, the way she’s holding her crotch, but if your child is like mine, unless she’s actually on the toilet, the answer to this question is a big, fat “No.” You might think you’re being a responsible parent when you ask this question. In fact, you are wasting your time. Your kid will go when she’s good and ready and not a second before… hopefully.

Unless your child dictates your agenda (in which case, we will never be friends), this question is Russian Roulette. When you go down this road, you’re being as shortsighted as your children. Save time and just tell your kids where they are going today. If they like the plan, consider it a bonus.

4) Did you poop? (toddler exclusive!)

You saw her disappear into the other room. She smells like a dumpster. And you know that every day of a toddler’s life is sponsored by the word “no.” Asking a two-year-old whether she pooped

7) Why did you push your sister?

All kids do stuff we don’t understand. They bite siblings, TP the bathroom, or wear footy pajamas in July.

And we want to know why. Repeat after me: They do not know. (Also: they get this from your partner.) When our kids behave, we credit our stellar parenting.

If, like me, you’re asking this question of someone who uses a Tot Clock to tell time, stop asking this question. If you have the kind of child who, when told she must leave the park in five minutes, counters with “No, three minutes!” stop asking this question. You are talking to an overtired, undersized human whose life goals include becoming a ballerina or maybe an astronaut and staying up all night. Letting them know exactly how long they’ve been winning the war on fatigue will only embolden them to keep pushing through.

Life’s too short for dumb questions, so I pledge to do my best to stop asking them. I don’t know about you, but I would rather spend my precious time asking the important questions, like, “How long until bedtime,” and, “Will they expect me to pay for therapy?”

This article was originally published on Motherly.

Pam Moore has written for The Washington Post, Huffington Post, Scary Mommy, and many others. She uses her experience as an occupational therapist, Ironman triathlete, and marathoner to help women push through fear to become their best selves.

To get her free guide to crushing Impostor Syndrome visit pam-moore.com.

May 2020 WNY Family 53

B

reakfast in bed... it conjures up all sorts of wonderful, relaxing images. The reality doesn’t always meet the expectations, though, when unsteady little hands try to wait on you. Ever have your preschooler serve you, only to get a bowlful of wet cereal spilled all over the covers? No? Trust me, it detracts from the special moment.

To create a truly relaxing experience, take a few cues from room service. The best presentations are simple, elegant, and spill proof. Clean, crisp linens cover the tray – it looks lovely, and keeps plates from sliding around. Silverware is rolled in a cloth napkin, which adds to the formality. Warm foods are insulated with a plate cover. A little bud vase with fresh flowers brighten up the meal. Beverages and other liquids are sealed with plastic or cup toppers, to minimize splashing and spilling. Condiments and seasonings are

BASIC MUFFIN MIX Free of: DAIRY, EGGS, SOY, WHEAT*, PEANUTS, TREE NUTS, FISH, SHELLFISH, GLUTEN* Yield: 48 muffins (4 batches of 12) Prep Time: 5 minutes CookTime: 15-20 minutes 8 cups flour* (regular or gluten* free) 1 3/4 cups sugar 1/4 cup baking powder (Featherweight brand is corn free) 1 Tablespoon baking soda 2 teaspoons salt Stir together ingredients. Store in an airtight jar/container.

If you have any questions about our column, e-mail Kathy at allergy@ roadrunner.com. For further information about food allergies, contact FARE www.foodallergy.org, or call 1-800-9294040.

in tiny serving containers so they fit easily on the tray and guests need not call back for butter or pepper.

Adapt these tips for home use. A placemat on the serving tray works as well as linens. If you don’t have cloth napkins, a clean towel serves the purpose.

Adorn the tray with a flower from the garden. Plate cold foods first. Tent warm foods with foil or a pan lid. Put pastries and muffins in a small covered basket.

Cover juice, coffee, or tea with plastic wrap. Pourable items, such as cream or milk, can go into small pitchers, also covered with plastic. Place small serving portions of jam, honey, or other condiments in a little bowl. Use leftover salt, pepper, and ketchup packets from take-out food.

Kids love to serve breakfast in bed on Mother’s Day. This can be a luxury, or can produce more work for mom when she gets up. While pancakes and eggs

FRUIT MUFFINS

(YIELDS 12) 2 1/4 cups of mix 1/4 cup oil 1 cup water, milk, or other liquid 1 teaspoon vanilla, lemon or other extract 1 cup fresh fruit (blueberries, chopped apple, peaches, other) Preheat oven to 400°. Grease muffin pan(s) or insert muffin/cupcake paper.

In a large bowl, mix all ingredients except fruit, stirring just until ingredients are moistened. (BATTER WILL BE LUMPY.) Lightly stir in fruit.

Spoon batter into muffin cups 2/3 full.

Bake 15-20 minutes at 400° until toothpick inserted in center comes out clean and tops are lightly browned. Let cool five minutes, then remove muffins from pan onto wire racks to cool completely.

may be a special departure from the daily routine, simple works best. Moms prefer not to come downstairs to a kitchen full of dishes, or burnt pans. Some ideas: toast and freshly cut up fruit, oatmeal and raisins with brown sugar, bagel and flavored cream cheese with juice, a bowl of yogurt with granola on the side, a warm muffin with jam, hot tea and fresh lemon. Makes me relaxed just thinking about it.

A few tips:  Make ahead muffin mix, so all little chefs need to do is add liquid and stir. The recipe is below.  Make sure baking powder is fresh, and use the muffin mix within six months.  Freeze left over muffins.  If you don’t have a breakfast tray, adapt with cookie sheet and a chair at bedside. Better yet, drop hints — a breakfast tray makes a great Mother’s Day gift!  Take turns serving each other – Father’s Day, birthdays, and sleepy rainy days — all make a great excuse to linger in bed awhile longer.

OATMEAL RAISIN MIX

6 cups flour* (regular or gluten* free) 2 cups rolled oats (not instant) 1 3/4 cups sugar 3 cups raisins 1/4 cup baking powder 2 Tablespoons cinnamon 1 Tablespoon baking soda 2 teaspoons salt Stir together mix ingredients. Store in an airtight jar/container.

TO BAKE: 2 1/4 cups of Oatmeal Raisin mix 1/4 cup oil 1 cup water, milk, or other liquid 1 teaspoon vanilla, lemon or other extract 1 cup fresh fruit (blueberries, chopped apple, peaches, other) Preheat oven to 400° and follow the same directions as for making the Fruit Muffins.

Kathy Lundquist is a Western New York parent whose son, now an adult, was born with severe food allergies. Over the last two decades, she has worked tirelessly, in a variety of capacities, to increase community awareness about food allergies.

54 WNY Family May 2020

THE KIDDIE GOURMET — by Barbara Blackburn

Boco Kitchen

7375 Boston State Road • Hamburg

716-578-0828

J

716-633-8646

bocokitchen.com

ilovechefsonthego.com

~ SPOONS ~

~ SPOONS ~

FOOD 4/5 SERVICE 4/5 FAMILY FRIENDLY 4/5

Kitchen.

Chef’s On The Go

5483 Sheridan Drive • Williamsville

ust before the restaurants had to close except for take-out and delivery, we dined at the Boco

At that time there was a kids’ menu with a choice of Peanut Butter Sandwich, with choice of fluff or banana, served with fresh fruit, including drink ($5.50); Panko Chicken Tenders, served with waffle fries, including drink ($5.50); Grilled Cheese, with fruit, and drink ($5.50); and Mac & Cheese Bites with fruit and drink ($5.50). These are crispy, warm, cheesy squares, available as an appetizer for adults, served with spicy ketchup ($6.50).

We enjoyed the panko breaded fish fry. My only complaint was that it should have been removed from the deep-fat fryer a minute or two earlier.

They now offer take-out, delivery, and a curbside delivery option. For family take-out or delivery, I would recommend the Chicken Fingers & Fries ($22.50), including six extra-large panko fingers, served with white or sweet potato waffle fries, coming with bleu cheese, hot sauce, celery, and carrots.

Those were the best sweet potato waffle fries, in my opinion. Other Family Meals include Spaghetti & Meatballs ($28.50), Chicken Parmesan ($28.50), and Two Pizzas ($28.50), each coming with a house salad.

I’m sure the limited take-out items, from a restaurant that offers a culinary twist on many items, would still capture the fantastic flavor of the food, and it would be convenient for all of you Southtowners.

Next we take a trip to the Northtowns to visit the “on the go” version of the iconic and classic Chef’s.

FOOD 4.5/5 SERVICE 5/5 FAMILY FRIENDLY 4/5

Let’s

y t r Pa

T

he menu at this mini version of the famous Buffalo Chef’s may be limited, but it offers the finest Chef’s has to offer.

Every dish is served with the signature meat sauce unless specified by the customer. All orders include bread, butter, parmesan cheese and eating utensils.

We ordered the world famous Spaghetti Parm ($13.50). We preferred to use our good dishes and silverware in our dining room, making this more of a special occasion — my birthday.

We plated the individual entrees and then the surplus amount on a large platter. Cloth napkins added some more class to this Italian take-out dinner enjoyed at home.

For a contrast we chose Fettuccini Alfredo with chicken and broccoli ($l6.20). We rated it second best to the Spaghetti Parm but thoroughly enioyed it. We sprinkled some of the rationed complimentary parm cheese — could have used more — over it.

One of the Nicest Things 5C8A0L-L0745 You Can Give Your Child TODAY! Is HAPPY MEMORIES! Invite Skiddles the Clown to Entertain at Your Child’s Next Birthday!

From the Appetizers, we ordered the Garlic Toast with Mozzarella Cheese ($6.25). This was tasty but I would, if preparing, go heavier on the garlic. Only your family will know…

Chicken, sausage and meatballs dominate in the Sandwich selections, ranging from $7.50 to $11.00. You’ll find that the Lunch Specials, from 11 am to 2 pm, Monday through Saturday, are priced a little less for similar items.

A cannoli ($5.25) beckons those craving dessert.

We definitely understand why Chef’s has long been a favorite restaurant and especially why the red sauce wins honors in competitions.

May 2020 WNY Family 55

56 WNY Family May 2020