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July 2024 • Volume 41 • Issue 5

EDITOR/PUBLISHER

Paul M. Kline

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Paul M. Kline

ADVERTISING DESIGN

Karen Wawszczyk

MAGAZINE LAYOUT/DESIGN

Michelle Richter

ONLINE EVENT CALENDAR EDITOR

Michele Miller

CONTRIBUTORS

Barbara Blackburn • Donna Phillips

Shannon Carpenter • Deborah Williams

Mike Daugherty • Meagan Ruffing

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Where It’s At!

Summer vacations

n I’m Not the Entertainment, But I Still Want to Have Fun by Rebecca Hastings

Directories:

12 n Summer Camps

17 n Choosing Childcare

19 n HEALTHY CHILD, HEALTHY FAMILY A Special Pull-Out Section

• A Mother’s Harrowing Tale of Her Son’s Decline into Mental Illness

• The Big 3 for Healthy Kids

• Expert Advice About How to Select a Pediatrician

• The Value of Body Neutrality

• Listen Up – Are Your Child’s Headphones Safe?

• Why Summer is the Best Time to Take Your Child to an Orthodontist

• What Every Mom and Soon-to-be Mom Needs to Know About Their Heart

Regulars:

5 n Web Finds / What’s New In The Kid Biz

14 n Family Travel

Get Ready for the Erie Canal Bicentennial by Deborah Williams

39 n Pick of the Literature by Dr. Donna Phillips

41 n Raising Digital Kids

My Child is a Hacker?! Help!! by Mike Daugherty

42 n The Daddy Track

Car Engines That Take Our Kids Away by Shannon Carpenter

43 n Parent Previews by Kirsten Hawkes

44 n Dear Teacher by Peggy Gisler & Marge Eberts

46 n Tweens and Teens

50 Fantastic Bonding Activities for Moms and Their Teenage Sons by Katy M. Clark

49 n Single Parenting

Using July as Your Reset Month by Meagan Ruffing

51 n Special Needs

What Are Anxiety Disorders?

54 n Family Flavors

© 2024 Western New York Family, Inc. All rights reserved. Reproduction in any form without permission is strictly prohibited. Inclusion of an advertisement does not constitute an endorsement by the publisher.

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• Adult and Childhood Diabetes is at an All-Time High: So Reduce Your Risk and Know the Symptoms

Create a Family-Friendly Grazing Board

55 n The Kiddie Gourmet

Brothers Restaurant and Bar by Barbara Blackburn

You’ll find FREE courtesy copies of WNY Family at all Buffalo area Wegmans and 300 locations including Public Libraries, Doctors’ Offices, Child Care Centers and many of our advertisers.

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web.finds

Outdoor

Summer

Games for the Family

Summer is in full swing! These fun backyard games will provide hours of entertainment for the whole family this season — and get the kids outdoors and off of their electronic devices!

Toss Across

It’s the Tic Tac Toe game you know but with added action and competition! Each player chooses to be an X or an O and gets three bean bags. Taking turns, you can toss the bean bags underhand or overhand, with a light touch or with a little more force, trying to flip the targets to show three of your letters in a row up, down, or diagonally. Unlike in classic Tic Tac Toe, in Toss Across you can undo your opponent’s X or O… or will you accidentally set the target back to blank? Competitive fun for children and the whole family! (Amazon, $21.84)

SORRY! Giant Edition

What’s New... IN THE KIDBIZ

WNY MOTHERS OF MULTIPLES DOUBLES CHARITABLE DONATIONS

The Western New York Mothers of Multiples Membership Club raised $1,200 in donations for organizations in need over the last year. While the group has seen a decline in membership since COVID, Club members have found unique ways to grow their charitable fund. With 110 members in 2019, the Club raised $650. This year, with 63 members, the Club nearly doubled that amount.

It’s the classic game of SORRY! with a GIANT twist! Start by placing your 3 giant pawns on your corner of the big, 64” x 64” vinyl mat gameboard. Spin the spinner to move your pawns out of the starting area, and then the fun begins! Be the first player to get your 3 pawns around the board and safely to Home, and you win! SORRY! GIANT EDITION’s large vinyl mat is at home on your living room floor, or take it outside to take the competition outdoors! SORRY! GIANT EDITION is big, unforgettable fun for get-togethers with friends and family. For 2 to 4 players, and ages 6 and up. (Amazon, $19.89)

National Geographic Scavenger Hunt

With National Geographic's Seek & Match Scavenger Hunt Card Game, kids can explore their world as they search for objects that match the words on their cards! With 5 game modes and 40 jumbo, easy-to-hold cards, this game provides endless amounts of screen-free fun and learning, indoors and outside! Designed to be played virtually anywhere, the Seek & Match Scavenger Hunt Card Game is great for road trips, camping, the backyard, and for indoor fun! Recommended for ages 3 and up. (Amazon, $9.99)

Basket Heads

What do you get when you combine basket toss with a hilarious twist? Wicked Big Sports Basket Heads, a competitive toss game that will make everyone smile. Grab 2 to 4 of your closest family and friends and get ready to play. One person in each pair ties an inflatable basket to their head and then their partner tries to get all four balls into the basket before the other team! Each set includes 2 inflatable baskets with straps and 8 balls. Recommended for ages 8 and up. (Amazon, $19.99)

“As President of this Club for the past three years, I am so very proud of our members’ generosity. Their efforts in raising funds for our Charities are astounding. We have a truly special group of women in this Club,” said Michele Fleischmann DelleBovi, Club President.

This year, the Club voted to split the donations among four different organizations: Compass House, Sleep in Heavenly Peace, Newborns in Need, and Project Linus.

“Despite our membership numbers declining in the wake of COVID, it is remarkable to see that the generous spirit of our club remains. We are always trying to think of new and creative opportunities to raise money for charity, some of our most successful events being a baked goods silent auction, and a gift card raffle. Children and family are the core of what ties our group together, and we love being able to give back to organizations within our community that share those similar values,” said Sarah Christman, Charity Committee Chair.

The WNY Mothers of Multiples Club is a non-profit organization, founded in 1959, and affiliated with the New York State Organization of Mothers of Twins Club. The Club's goal is to support expectant and current mothers of multiples (twins, triplets, or more) educationally, socially, and emotionally. The Club hosts nights out for moms and couples, getaways, and activities for the whole family.

If you are a mother of multiples in Western New York and interested in learning more about the Club, contact Katie Brick, Membership Chair, at wnymothersofmultiples@gmail.com or visit wnymultiples.org.

Ao remembe

While many people use summertime for an annual vacation, that may not work for every family. Instead, you can opt for a staycation. This involves sleeping in your home and taking day trips to local attractions. While they may not involve as much travel as a traditional vacation, staycations can be just as fun.

WHY TAKE A STAYCATION

There are multiple benefits of a staycation. One of the most common is that it is more economical. Without the expense of airfare, hotels, and car rental, families can spend their money on the activities they want to do. This is especially helpful if you are working with a limited budget.

Staycations are also easier to plan. You may not be able to get a full week off of work, but you could manage a few days. A staycation allows you to fill those days with fun so you don’t miss the family time of a vacation. You also don’t need to worry about lodging and travel arrangements. You simply need to plan where you are going and know you will be back to sleep in your own bed.

Taking a staycation also provides a great opportunity to explore things in your area that you don’t normally see. Whether it’s activities, museums, restaurants, or parks, there are things you and

your family can explore within driving distance.

THE KEY TO A GREAT STAYCATION

If you want a staycation to be one you and your family remember, the key is to plan it. While it may be fun to be spontaneous and see where the day takes you, you still need some plans or the day may end up filled with household chores instead of a getaway.

Take the time off work, clear everyone’s schedules, and put it on the calendar, just like you would for a regular vacation. If you’re not sure what to do, keep a running list of places you want to go with your family on a note in your phone or even a folder on your social media. Keeping these ideas in one place will help you when it’s time to plan.

MAKE YOUR STAYCATION MEMORABLE

You can make your staycation just as special as a jet-setting getaway. Here

are some things to keep in mind as you plan your staycation:

Plan Together: Involve your kids in the planning process. Let them choose activities and destinations to visit around your local area. This will help them feel engaged and invested in the process.

Create a Schedule: Make a loose itinerary of activities to do each day. Include a mix of indoor and outdoor activities, as well as downtime. Be sure to schedule time for meals with ideas for where to go to avoid people getting cranky.

Theme Days: Have themed days such as “Adventure Day,” “Art Day,” or “Sports Day,” where all activities revolve around that theme.

Explore Local Attractions: Visit local parks, museums, zoos, or attractions you haven't been to before. Check for special events or exhibits.

Backyard Camping: Set up a tent in the backyard, roast marshmallows, and tell stories around a campfire. Make sure all household and work chores are offlimits.

Cook Together: Plan and prepare meals together. Try making new recipes or cooking foods that the kids enjoy. You can even pack food to bring on your adventures.

Game Night: For a simple staycation that is less than a full day, have a family game night with board games, card games, or video games that everyone can enjoy.

Movie Marathon: Head to the movies or pick a series of movies to

watch together at home. Create a cozy movie night complete with popcorn and blankets.

Arts and Crafts: Go to the craft store and pick up fun crafts to do together. Then have a crafting day where you can make art projects or DIY crafts.

Local Food Tour: Explore different local restaurants or food trucks. Let each family member pick a place to eat.

DAVID DE MARIE DANCE

Plan a Day: Give each person in the family one day to plan for your summer staycation. You can do them all in one week or spread them over the summer.

MAKE MEMORIES TOGETHER

The best part of a staycation is the time you spend together. At the end of your staycation, reflect on the memories you’ve made together. Ask everyone to share their favorite moments and pictures from the day.

By focusing on quality time together, exploring new activities, and creating a sense of adventure, you can make your family staycation memorable and enjoyable for everyone.

Rebecca Hastings is a former elementary teacher who traded the classroom for writing when she stayed home with her three children. Passionate about authenticity, faith, and family, you can find her at RebeccaHastings.net and on Amazon. In real life, she can often be found typing words, driving her kids places, or wherever there is chocolate.

Creating Lifelong Adventurers: How Children Benefit from Travel

When we think of travel, we think of its many facets and functions. Business travel, leisure travel, commuter travel, holiday travel, family travel. Regardless of the nature or occasion, travel is a delicate balance of breaking free from the grind and leaning into the support of the cosmos and one’s own selfefficacy to experience life at its fullest.

Less of the mundane; more of travel. Travel moves us, quite literally.

In my twenties, I worked at a NYCbased boutique travel public relations firm. I wrote and talked about travel on a daily basis. I was also traveling myself for both work and pleasure, flying about forty times a year. Not a huge number, but it certainly beat the Gallup poll average of 3.6 trips per year for working Americans.

Footloose and fancy free, being up in the air back then just made sense.

But that was well before my son was a twinkle in my eye, and as many know, having kids reorganizes priorities. Jet-setting like I used to was no longer in the deck of cards, for now at least.

My son was just an infant during the height of the Covid-19 pandemic, and I knew that I somehow needed to share

my passion for travel with him. I wanted to cultivate in him a strong worldview and cultural sensitivities, those often best learned through travel.

Once it was safe to move about again, our journey began, however, this time I had to adjust to the financial realities of post-pandemic travel and to my current season of life. Instead of rejoining the jet-set elite, car travel fit the bill. Our road trip adventures have taken us up and down the East Coast, to regional destinations, parks, playgrounds, campgrounds, historical sites, and off-thebeaten path towns. My mother and our dog usually join, making our road trips multi-generational and pet friendly.

Here are some benefits that travel has on children that I have observed on our over forty long-haul road trips. Take them for what they are worth and apply them as you wish to inspire your next multi-generational, family, or solo adventure!

1. TRAVEL BUILDS CONFIDENCE AND CHARACTER

Travel makes us as individuals, and as families, stronger. It makes us more resilient and adaptable. It builds confi-

dence and character. And I’m not alone in these sentiments.

In a 2023 study of over 3,300 parents and grandparents conducted by the Family Travel Association (FTA) in partnership with NYU School of Professional Studies (NYU SPS) Jonathan M. Tisch Center for Hospitality and Edinburgh Napier University, 62% of the respondents claimed that “travel has helped their children to be more confident.”

That is similar to the findings of the 2015 Student & Youth Travel Association’s (SYTA) Student & Youth Travel Digest, which noted that 56% of re-

spondents concluded that student travel (domestic and/or international travel for students ages 10-18) increased independence, self-esteem, and confidence.

For domestic travel, 54% of respondents reported that domestic student travel increases their willingness to “know/learn/explore.” This benefit was closely followed by the desire to travel more at 52%.

Furthermore, travel teaches responsibility. Got a flight to catch? Get to the airport early or risk missing it. Running late for a train? Who do you contact if you miss your boarding group? Travel forces us to step outside of our comfort zone and deal with real-world problems in unfamiliar environments, sometimes with language and cultural differences.

So how does this benefit children? Consider that they are getting real-world experience while solving real-world problems in real time. Now that’s something to write home about!

2. TRAVEL FOSTERS OPEN-MINDEDNESS AND EMPATHY

The same abovementioned SYTA study concluded that of the overall social impacts of travel on students, 49% reported that travel created better adaptability and sensitivity, and 48% responded that travel increased tolerance and respectfulness.

Additionally, 74% of respondents reported that international travel increased students’ tolerance of other cultures and ethnicities, which was the second most important social impact on student international travel concluded by the study. This benefit was second only to the desire to travel more.

One way that I encourage openmindedness and empathy is through reading books about different cultures and ways of life with my son at home which translates to our experiences on the road. Reading books celebrating differences in the human fabric of life has helped prep my son for our adventures.

Although we’re not traveling internationally yet, it has still helped him adapt and adjust to different climates,

customs, accents, attitudes, and regional idiosyncrasies that make this country so unique.

3. TRAVEL CREATES GLOBAL CITIZENS

There is no doubt that travel, with an emphasis on international travel, creates more global citizens. Through experiential travel, children will learn about new cultures, taste new foods, maybe sample ingredients that are not available stateside, and learn new customs. This type of interactive and immersive learning cannot easily be replicated in classrooms. It needs to be explored in the real world through real-life situations, which can further enhance what is taught.

According to the press release issued by NYU SPS and the FTA, 80% of respondents concluded that “travel has helped their children see the world from a broader perspective.” Furthermore, 67% of respondents “agree that their children have become more interested in other cultures because of their travel experiences.”

Getting curious about their world and how other people live are certainly big incentives and testament to the benefits of traveling with children.

tion helps. On our many long-haul road trips, my son and I practice his French vocabulary by using flash cards, listening to nursery rhymes, and reading books. We have yet to travel to a French speaking territory, however I am amazed at how his second language acquisition has impacted his sentence structure and variation in English. Plus, as his French vocabulary expands, his English vocabulary does as well.

As an added benefit from our travels, he is learning new words and expressions on the road in real-time, too, like “portico,” “silo,” “water tower,” “intersection,” and “tractor-trailer”. Sure, some of these words might be found in books, but actually being able to experience them and see them in the environment is worth all its weight in gold.

Another one of my favorites is what he calls the “Deer Crossing the Road” sign. Every time we pass a deer crossing sign (or the occasional bear crossing sign, eek!), my son explains its meaning in great detail.

5. PUTS THEIR STREET SMARTS TO THE TEST

4. IMPROVES COMMUNICATION SKILLS

Traveling to a non-English speaking country is probably the most obvious as it is a wonderful way to immerse children into a new language. There is also a large body of research that suggest that secondary language acquisition (for most languages) helps with native languages.

Reading about the language and learning some basic phrases before traveling to a non-English speaking destina-

It’s important to remember that when traveling with children, they are constantly learning and absorbing new ideas, new expressions, new mannerisms, and new ways of problem-solving. Travel helps push kids outside their comfort zone in a positive way. Take for example learning to cross the street. I remember from my own childhood having to relearn the basics of crossing the street on a family trip to London. Having to cognitively process looking for cars coming in the opposite direction before crossing the road was a real grow moment for me, and one that I will never forget.

When I am traveling with my son, I have confidence that he is learning with each step of the journey and each leg of the trip (puns intended). I know that whatever he learns through travel, he applies to his social interactions and to what he learns at preschool in his interactions with others and while we are on the road.

continued on page 16

(StatePoint)

Whether you’re day tripping with family, taking a week-long vacation with pals, or doing a crosscountry solo drive, summer roadtrips of all kinds can be long and exhausting. The good news? There are plenty of ways to improve the experience.

Great Snacks

Road trip snacks are non-negotiable! They make car rides of any length brighter and keep drivers and passengers happy and fueled for the miles ahead.

It’s best to have a mix of snack options that are easy to eat in the car or at roadside stops. Carrot sticks, pretzels and nuts make great savory choices. For an easy, on-the-go, fruity and juicy snack, try Black Forest Gummy Bears and Gummy Worms. Now juicier, Black Forest Gummy Bears and Gummy Worms are made in six delicious fruity flavors making them a great road trip snack. Crafted with care, they are made with real fruit juice, as well as colors and flavors from real sources.

Before hitting the road, find Black Forest at a nearby retailer by visiting blackforestusa.com.

Refreshing Breaks

Making great time shouldn’t come at the expense of you or your traveling companions’ comfort. Beyond typical bathroom breaks and pit stops, consider visiting points of interest along the route. Ideally, these detours shouldn’t add too much additional mileage to your odometer or time on the road, but instead, be designed to break up the trip in manageable chunks. From a natural landmark to a beautiful view, the experiences will emotionally and physically rejuvenate your party for the next leg of the journey.

Games and Music

Entertainment can help the miles pass more quickly. If you’re driving alone, prep a great playlist or download some audiobooks or podcasts in advance of the trip so you aren’t dis-

Road Tripping This Summer? Keep These Tips

in Mind

tracted by flipping through your device while driving. Try giving each hour of the journey a different theme — such as songs of a specific genre or from a particular decade, or by letting passengers take turns being the DJ. You can also pass the time playing classic road trip games like “I Spy” and “Twenty Questions.” Keep passengers in the backseat occupied, particularly little ones, by supplying them with portable versions of their favorite board games.

Sustainable Tweaks

It’s easy to reduce your impact on the environment on road trips, and doing so will make you and your travel companions feel better and more energized about your journey!

Try turning off the AC and feeling the fresh breeze from open windows to reduce your fuel use. When it comes to hydration, bring your own reusable water bottles and refill them at rest station water fountains. You can also select snacks wisely. Black Forest Gummy Bears and Gummy Worms, for example, are now available in store drop-off recycle-ready packaging. Help protect the planet by participating in the Store Drop Off program, conveniently located at retail stores along your route.

With delicious snacks, and fun games and detours, a road trip doesn’t just have to be a means to an end, it can also be a relaxing and fun part of your vacation.

I’m Not the Entertainment, But I Still Want to Have Fun

The day was wide open before us. And by wide open I mean we didn’t have school. We were no longer tethered to packing lunches and getting to the bus stop. No longer slaves to homework calendars and after-school activities. It was a day off. We should celebrate!

My mind began racing with ideas.

We could go to that new science museum. Or maybe we should head to the movies. No, save those for a rainy day. Hmmm…the beach? The park? Or maybe a picnic at the park followed by ice cream at the beach? There was no shortage of possibilities.

My kids barely noticed me, happy to start their day void of the typical structure. They may have felt relaxed, basking in their newfound freedom. I, on the other hand, was busy figuring out how to make the day magical.

I had pictures in my mind of what the other parents would be doing with their kids. I scolded myself for not thinking ahead to have the kids invite friends over so they could come to enjoy the day of fun I was spinning in my mind. Oh, well. I could still make the day magical for my three.

And then I tripped over the laundry pile on my way to feed the dogs.

Looking around I saw all the things that still had to be done. The beds to be made, the dirty dishes piled in the sink, the work email notifications on my phone. School may have ended, but real life didn’t. There was a tug-of-war going on in my head between the magic I expected to create and the real-life things that had to get done.

I felt defeated and wondered why I was fighting at all.

I had developed an expectation that life was a great big Instagram feed for the world to see. This feed represented who I am, but also who I want to be, who I think others want me to be, and who I can never be. In all the headlines telling me how to “Create a Magical Summer” and “Make Memories that Last a Lifetime” I began running faster and faster on a hamster wheel of creating a magical childhood for my kids.

The truth is magic isn’t real. It’s all about illusions.

Just like I am never going to be five foot eight and size two (no matter how high the heels and how tight the Spanx), I’m never going to entertain my kids 24/7. Even the thought is exhausting.

I want to do fun things with my kids, but not at the expense of living life, real life. They need to see that there is a balance between fun and normal, or better yet, a melding of the two. And while I may be able to lead them that way, I can’t navigate the whole way for them.

If I want them to grow up to be more than consumers of this beautiful world, I need to give them the chance to live in it, contribute to it, and be part of it. We are not spectators, but we are contributors, active participants in creating a life we love. And this means doing things that don’t make the Instagram feed.

I look around and see them. One is plugged into an audiobook, one is playing a video game, and one headed outside to scooter. They are content for the moment, so I permit myself to be content. I know that the moment won’t last forever, and as I exhale, I think about what needs to happen and what we want to happen.

The day is a day. It is magical simply because it exists. There will be laundry to fold today. And they will help. But if we do that right after lunch, we can grab an ice cream and head to the park.

We can find moments of magic in ordinary days.

It is not my job to entertain my kids. And they shouldn’t be entertained all day. We can, however, find ways to have fun in real life. To have beach days and home days. To have chore times and break times. To do nothing and to do something amazing.

Summer isn’t about endless entertaining. It’s simply about enjoying the moments and living life along the way.

Summer Intensive

Camp Can Help You Raise An Independent,

Kids learn first and foremost from their parents — they learn how to speak, dress themselves, play games, help with household chores and, as they grow, absorb traits modeled by their parents such as kindness, gratitude, and generosity.

But there are other traits best learned through experience, outside the home and beyond the watchful eyes of parents. Summer camp is the perfect place for a child to develop a sense of independence, confidence, and resilience.

Camp offers the opportunity for kids to see how much they are capable of without their parents hovering nearby. In the digital age, parents are hyper-connected to their kids, swooping in at a moment’s notice — via text, of course — to save the day. At camp, kids take more responsibility for themselves and their belongings, make their own decisions, and feel a sense of autonomy. For many kids, camp is the first opportunity they’ve had to experience these things.

As parents, we’re always telling our kids that they’re great. But when another respected adult, such as a camp counselor, recognizes a positive trait in your child and points it out, it can have a major impact.

At camp, kids are encouraged to set goals, challenge themselves, and overcome failure like struggling to climb a rock wall or completing a ropes course. Camp instills “grit” — the power of perseverance — in learning a new skill.

Camp is a place where everyone is trying new things, making it easier to deal with a challenging task, especially when nonfamily member mentors are there to encourage and coach, and fellow campers are there to cheer you on because they’ve been challenged in the same way.

There are so many different types of camps available today that every child should be able to find one that interests him or her. Perhaps more importantly in today’s digital world, camp gets kids outdoors and away from too much time spent in front of a screen. They have the opportunity to socialize, face to face, and make new friends in addition to acquiring new skills.

Investing in summer camp is the same as making an investment in your child’s future. The experience gained will last a lifetime.

EGet Ready for the Erie Canal Bicentennial

xcitement is already building along the 363-mile-long Erie Canal and the three connecting canals, as everyone looks to next year’s grand bicentennial celebration.

The 525-mile canal system includes the Erie Canal, the Oswego Canal, the Cayuga-Seneca Canal, and the Champlain Canal. The Champlain Canal was completed in 1823 and has the distinction of being the oldest continuously operating canal in the country.

Erie Canal Bicentennial Get Ready for the Erie Canal Bicentennial

FAMILY TRAVEL

— by Deborah Williams

It was on October 26, 1825, that the original Seneca Chief, pulled by a team of horses, lead a flotilla of boats on an epic voyage along the canal from Buffalo to New York City. The trip marked the formal opening of what soon became the country’s most famous canal after eight long years of construction. On that date, the world changed forever.

On board the first Seneca Chief was Gov. DeWitt Clinton who championed

President Thomas Jefferson thought it was “little short of madness to think of such a canal at this day.” He went on to say that he believed it was “a very fine project that might be executed a century hence.”

The biggest bicentennial project was launched into the water in May in Buffalo after the nearly four-year construction of a replica of the first boat that traversed the newly completed canal. The Seneca Chief is on display and open for tours at Canalside. Next year it will make the trip to New York City with the aid of the tugboat Churchill.

The 73-foot-long wooden boat was constructed by more than 200 Buffalo Maritime Center volunteers. During its construction in the nearby Longshed Building, thousands of visitors including many families who hailed from every state and most countries stopped to see the building process and learn about the boat and the canal.

the canal when he was still mayor of New York City. He envisioned a waterway from Buffalo on the eastern shore of Lake Erie to Albany on the upper Hudson River. In those early days, the project was often sarcastically referred to as Clinton’s Big Ditch.

The canal is North America’s most successful and influential manmade waterway. When completed, the Erie Canal was the first all-water link between the Atlantic Seaboard and the Great Lakes. The canal was a marvel, the Internet of its era, opening new vistas and changing not only the lives of those who adventured on the waters, but also New York State and the entire nation. It fostered settlement in the Northeast, Midwest, and Great Plains, transformed New York City into the nation’s principal seaport, and created many communities across New York State. It is impossible to overemphasize the immediate and longlasting effects of the canal.

Buffalo and other canal towns became overnight boomtowns. The choice of Buffalo as the terminus of the canal quickly transformed Buffalo into one of the great American cities of the 19th century.

Seneca Chief

Opening 19th century lock in Lockport

The 19th century wonder has been rediscovered and reenergized. Today’s canal—the third version—is both a National Heritage Corridor and a National Historic Site. But it is very much an active canal during the May – October season. Unlike the original canal, there are no tolls on today’s canal for recreational boaters.

Lockport is the closest canal community with operating locks and tour boats. Visitors can enjoy the unique experience of “locking through” the only set of double locks on the canal—Locks 34 & 35. Lockport Locks & Erie Canal Cruises offers daily cruises.

Today’s canal still travels the route of the original canal right through the center of Lockport. Under the direction of the Lockport Heritage District Corporation, several recent projects were designed to highlight the city’s unique canal history.

with opening Niagara Falls to tourism in the early days of the canal. The stop was part of what was called the Grand Northern Tour. The canal allowed easy, inexpensive travel and historians refer to this era as the birth of American tourism.

yon, chairman of the Lockport Locks Heritage District Corp. “We are pursuing state and federal grants to enable us to restore the remaining two locks.”

Pittsford, a jewel among canal villages, boasts one of the earliest and best-preserved collections of 19th century structures in the Rochester region. It is one of the canal communities that parallels the original Erie Canal. The depression in the yards of homes along South St. marks the original canal.

When the Marquis de Lafayette, the French hero of the American Revolution, visited the United States in 1825, he declared that Niagara County possessed the greatest natural wonder—Niagara Falls—and manmade wonder—the canal locks—known in the world. It took two years to build these locks and blast a deep canal channel in the rock west of Lockport. This was the most expensive and difficult section of the canal construction.

The Lock Tenders Tribute Monument is now complete and recreates an iconic 1897 photograph of Lockport Lock Tenders seated on the stone stairway in the Lockport Locks. The monument consists of 13 life size figures (plus a statue of the photographer) sitting on the same stairs. All the people in the photograph have been identified except for one. There was even a child in the photo and she is now one of the statues — Bessie Wagoner, the daughter of one of the lock tenders.

The Flight of Five locks were part of the 1842 enlargement of the canal. These locks were often referred to as “staircase locks” due to the immediate succession from one lock to the next.

Erie Canal Locks—67 through 71— make up the Flight of Five, the largest intact section of the historic Erie Canal remaining. The reconstruction of Lock 68, 69, and 70 has been completed.

This achievement means that Lockport is home to the country’s only operational 19th and 20th century canal locks. Best of all, on Saturdays through September 28, volunteers operate the 19th century locks and bring the Erie Trav-

Visitors can step back in time on the Sam Patch, a tour boat designed as an old-fashioned canal packet boat. In the 19th century, the narrow boats carried mostly passengers and provided food and sleeping arrangements. They were long and narrow to accommodate the constricted demands of the early canal.

They were the fastest way to travel the canal because they were pulled faster, often exceeding the 4-mph speed limit and were given priority at the locks. Slower boats had to let the packets pass.

The Lois McClure, a replica 1862-class canal schooner, is a temporary attraction in Seneca Falls on the Cayuga-Seneca Canal this summer. It was built in 2002 at the Lake Champlain Maritime Museum and was donated to the Canal Society of New York State last year.

The project celebrates and memorializes the 19th century lock tenders who worked 12 hours a day, seven days a week, from April to November to enable boats to traverse the canal. It has become a popular selfie photo spot.

Lockport has been called “America’s Staircase” and has been credited

eler, a 19th century style boat built by the Buffalo Maritime Center, through the locks to the cheers of onlookers.

“We have a set of two 20th century mechanically operated locks and an authentic set of 19th century manually operated locks,” explained David Kin-

The Canal Society maintains the unique Old Erie Canal Heritage Park at Port Byron. It is accessible to Thruway travelers going east without the need to leave the Thruway, free for all, and dog friendly. There is also an entrance from Route 31 in Port Byron.

“It will be a complicated project to get the 83-foot-long Lois McClure from Seneca Falls to our Enlarged Erie Canal Lock 52—the boat’s final destination,” explained Dan Wiles, manager of the park. “The last few miles will be over land and that will involve fund raising and permits, but we hope to have the boat in place by next year.”

continued on page 16

The Lock Tenders Tribute Monument sculptures by Jeff Tracy

Lockport lock cruise boat

The park includes a Visitors Center with displays telling the story about the restored buildings and the lock. The Erie House Saloon, Blacksmith Shop and Mule Barn have been restored and are open and staffed by volunteers who enjoy telling the stories of life along the canal.

The structures were built by Italian immigrants Pietro and Salvatore Van Detto in 1895. There is even a large cardboard display of their dog Maud. Their section of the canal was abandoned in 1918 when the latest generation of the Erie Canal in the canalized Seneca River three miles north opened.

The New York Canal Corporation is once again sponsoring its innovative program designed to provide free outdoor, cultural, accessible and educational opportunities to do along the canal system changing with the seasons. The program, called On the Canals, is designed to showcase the waterways, trails, and communities. There are three regions for the programs: Western NY, Central NY and Mohawk Valley/Capital Region.

Programs include kayaking on the Cayuga-Seneca Canal, E-Bike Tours in Buffalo, Electric Boat Cruise in Macedon, a Family Kayak Tour in Macedon, Youth Safety and Water Safety, Kayaking at the Montezuma Audubon Center, a tour of LockE24 in Baldwinsville, Erie Canal Walking Tour and even a Plant tour. Reservations are required and spaces are limited.

The Erie Canalway National Heritage Corridor is once again sponsoring the Canalway Challenge with the motto: “Tracing History, Tracking Miles.” Sign up online and chose your goal of miles for walking, kayaking, cycling, hiking along the canals and the Canalway trail. Choose a goal, track your miles, and upload your photo to earn your certificate, mileage magnet, and sticker.

Travel Tip of the Month: For information on the Seneca Chief visit buffalomaritimecenter.org. For information on the Erie Canal and upcoming programs and celebrations visit eriecanalway.org. For information on Lockport canal cruises visit lockportlocks.com or call 716-433-6155. For Lockport Locks District visit discoverlockport.com and locksdistrict.com. For On the Canals visit onthecanals.com. For the Old Erie Canal Heritage Park visit newyorkcanals.org.

Deborah Williams lives in Holland, NY and is a veteran travel writer whose work has appeared in national and international publications. She is the recipient of the Society of American Travel Writers’ Lowell Thomas Gold Travel Writing Award.

6. CREATES LIFELONG MEMORIES

There is a lot of literature out there pertaining to the importance of traveling with children and one such body of research includes the impact that travel has on creating lifelong memories. The U.S. Travel Association’s State of the Travel Industry 2022 report concluded that 78% of Americans agree that travel builds strong connections and relationships with friends and family.

It is not just a vacation or time away from the office, folks. It is sacred family time well spent. It is about connecting and creating connections for a lifetime. And that is invaluable.

While on the road, we always stop for an outdoor picnic at a rest area or at a nearby state or national park. The possibilities (and opportunities) to create shared memories are endless.

So, what are you waiting for? There is no better time than summer to gather your tribe, hit the road, and start exploring! May the power of travel move you and your family, too.

Dena J. DiOrio is a professional writer and mom to a very busy 4-yearold and a rescue pup. She holds a BA in French from the University of Denver and an MS in Professional Writing from New York University School of Professional Studies. A native of Cleveland, Ohio, Dena grew up summering in Chautauqua County, playing ice hockey and snowboarding throughout New York state, and working at some of the top restaurants in Manhattan. She spends time traveling with her family between the sunny beaches of Charleston, South Carolina and the rolling hills of western New York. Her writing covers an array of topics including family and experiential travel, food, spa, and outdoor and recreation.

Choosing Childcare

Choosing Childcare

— by Kimberly Blaker

A Mother’s Harrowing Tale of Her Son’s Decline into Mental Illness – and Signs to Watch for in Teens & Young Adults

Regardless of our kids’ trials and tribulations during childhood and into the early teen years, the furthest thing from most parents’ minds is that their young adult child may develop a serious mental illness. Unfortunately, it’s an equal opportunity disease that can strike even model kids who’ve rarely experienced a difficult day in their lives. The incurable brain diseases of schizophrenia, schizoaffective disorder, and bipolar disorder combined strike one in every 25 people — typically as they enter adulthood.

My son (who I’ll call Sean) was diagnosed with schizoaffective disorder at the age of 19. This disease is the combined illness of schizophrenia and bipolar disorder.

The first several years of his adult life were spent inside a living hell—literally. The early-stage was marked primarily by delusions and paranoia: there was a government conspiracy against him, Li’l Wayne and Drake were writing derogatory songs about him, and pimps were trying to kill him. But this was only the beginning of a downward spiral.

The first year of treatment showed only mild success. Antipsychotics are relatively fast-acting and, if monitored, can be quickly adjusted or changed. Unfortunately, throughout the country, there’s a severe shortage of psychiatric beds, a lack of adequate federal and state funding for mental health care services, and laws as sick as those who are ill. So, he was in and out of the hospital within

days, still in psychosis. Further hindering recovery, he was allowed only one 30-minute psychiatric appointment per month despite having a severe brain disease.

There are two broader problems with treatment for the SMI in America. These are laws and funding.

Well-intended laws were created decades ago to protect the rights of seriously mentally ill individuals. But legislators didn’t take into account that those with SMI are often unaware of their illness due to a symptom called anosognosia. As a result, those with SMI are most often unwilling to seek treatment.

Mental health hospitals have shut down in droves in recent decades. At the same time, public funding for treatment has dwindled drastically. This has impeded the development of adequate outpatient services and housing for seriously mentally ill people.

Important to note, new research indicates episodes of psychosis may cause more damage to the brain. The lack of timely, adequate, and appropriate treatment often results in each episode becoming increasingly more severe, reducing the likelihood of recovery.

This had proven true for Sean. A year into his illness, he received a message from a game of Scrabble to cut off his ear or toe or to break a leg to save the world. In the middle of the night, I awakened to his blood-curdling screams. He had jumped 15 feet from a tree, fracturing his back instead. Just before this feat, he attempted, unsuccessfully, to silence

the commands. He branded his arm with a fork, a scar that remains today. He was admitted for psychiatric care, but released within seven days with little improvement.

Over the next three years, he was hospitalized with increasing frequency, always released within days. He was paranoid and lived in constant fear with the belief his family and friends wanted to kill him. He hallucinated that I said such horrific things to him as, “I’m going to chop off your head,” or “I’ll bury you alive.” He spent nights awake sitting on his bed prepared to bolt if I broke down the door to kill him.

A few years into the illness, the television told him he was Jeffrey Dahmer, and the President told him to kill me. My son isn’t violent. But statistics speak for themselves. Psychosis (hallucinations, delusions, and paranoia) often leads to violent and tragic acts by those who are otherwise nonviolent. It was a severalday battle to get him hospitalized. But he was released in 3 days in the same condition.

Finally, we got a little breather, though. For a couple of months, although his psychosis was still present, it had at least improved. But this often didn’t last. With Sean’s paranoia that doctors, pharmaceutical companies, and his family were trying to poison him, he often refused medication.

Soon Sean took another downturn. He couldn’t comprehend real conversations because the hallucinatory voices were so overpowering. He carried on arguments with these voices, told news anchors on the TV to shut up because they were talking about him, and was angry with the Pope for something the Pope was doing to him.

He repeatedly insisted he was traversing. As a result, there were two of him, or maybe three — and he didn’t know which was the real him. He became confused and didn’t know where he was and often pleaded with me to get him home. I’d try to reassure him, “you are the real Sean, and you are safe at home.” It was heartbreaking.

Finally, several years into my son’s illness, I was able to get his psychiatrist to put him on Clozapine, the gold

continued on page 22

A MOTHER’S HARROWING TALE OF HER SON’S DECLINE INTO MENTAL ILLNESS

standard for treatment-resistant patients. Although Sean still experiences mild psychosis and is disabled, he’s seen a remarkable improvement.

But my son and I aren’t alone. This plays out for millions of seriously mentally ill people and their families dayafter-day, week-after-week, and yearafter-year as loved ones spiral further into the abyss.

In recent years, legislative proposals have been introduced. There’ve been some very small strides in changing laws to improve the care and treatment for those with SMI. Still, there’s a long

way to go to ensure appropriate and adequate treatment for all the sons, daughters, parents, and siblings in America suffering from serious mental illness — and for the countless people who in the future who will be struck by this dreadful fate.

Signs of schizophrenia to watch for in your teen or young adult child

It’s often difficult to recognize SMI as it’s developing. That’s because many symptoms of these illnesses are also typ-

ical problems associated with the teen years. There’s no cure for schizophrenia, schizoaffective disorder, or bipolar disorder. Still, recovery is possible for many with these brain diseases. But early detection is crucial to the prognosis.

Schizophrenia

With schizophrenia, the symptoms usually, though not always, develop gradually over months or even a couple of years. They show up as changes in behavior, thinking, and emotions.

Changes in behavior may include:

• Poor hygiene

• Talking to oneself or odd speech

• Difficulty with making or maintaining friendships

• Substance abuse

• Unusual facial or body movements

• Unblinking vacant expressions

• Trouble picking up on social cues

• Threatening behaviors

• Increasing isolation

• Inappropriate emotional responses, like laughing at something sad

Emotional changes can be seen in:

• Angry outbursts

• Extreme moodiness or irritability

• Severe anxiety and fearfulness

Changes in thinking might include paranoia:

• Obsessing about the past

• Visual or auditory hallucinations

• Delusional thinking (illogical and nonsensical ideas)

• Difficulty with concentration or following a train of thought

• Trouble distinguishing dreams or television scenes from reality

• Decreased need for sleep

• Elated mood to exaggerated optimism

• Increased energy

• Increased confidence

• Extreme focus on projects

• Increased physical or mental activity

Bipolar

Bipolar is a mood disorder with swings to opposite extremes. It’s believed there may be a correlation between this disease and ADHD. There are a couple of forms of bipolar, one in which mania is more severe. The less extreme state is called hypomania. With bipolar, mood swings in teens can change in the course of just a few hours or days. During adulthood, the swings can last much longer, for weeks or months.

Depressive symptoms to watch for include:

• Loss of interest in activities

• Decline in grades

• Difficulty concentrating

• Prolonged sadness or irritability

• Loss of energy

• Change in sleep patterns

• Change in food intake

• Feelings of guilt or worthlessness

• No longer experiencing pleasure

• Suicidal thoughts

• Anxiety, worrying, and anger

The difference between mania and hypomania is primarily the severity of the state where mania is more extreme. Mania or hypomania can be seen in the following symptoms:

• Increased creativity or productivity

• Increased libido to hypersexual thoughts and behavior

• Difficulty concentrating

• Inflated sense of self-importance

• Risk-taking and reckless behavior

• Racing speech and thoughts

• Grandiose delusions

• Hallucinations

Schizoaffective disorder

This disease has combined symptoms of both schizophrenia and bipolar. The symptoms, therefore, can be any combination of symptoms for the two distinct conditions.

Getting help

If your child exhibits signs of SMI, be aware that counselors and therapists often don’t have the educational and medical background to diagnose or treat these specific brain diseases. Seek an evaluation at a walk-in mental health crisis center or with a licensed psychiatrist. You can also consult with your family doctor, who can make a referral.

Kimberly Blaker has been an advocate for mental healthcare reform for individuals with serious mental illness. She also owns an online bookshop, Sage Rare & Collectible Books.

AUDUBON COUNSELING

CENTER

Barry J. Chapman, LCSW-R

♦ Adolescent Therapy

♦ Anxiety/Depression

♦ Substance Use and Gambling Treatment

♦ Co-Dependency as it pertains to Addiction

♦ Addiction and Family Dynamics “Healing from Within”

4800 N. French Road | East Amherst, NY 716-689-3110, Option 3 (Office) 716-400-8939 (Cell) bchapman@auduboncounseling.com

www.auduboncounseling.com

— by Rebecca Hastings

TThe Big 3 for Healthy Kids: Nutrition, Movement, and Rest

here is a lot of information out there about kids’ health. Someone is always telling us what to do or outlining a new plan. Worse are the people telling us what we do wrong for our kids’ health. While well-meaning, these things sometimes just make us feel more stressed about parenting. Instead of looking for the latest fad when it comes to health, it’s important to keep things simple.

Focusing on three key elements will help you create a healthy foundation for your kids. Nutrition (what your kids eat), movement (moving their body), and rest (giving them adequate time for sleep) are the most important elements of a healthy lifestyle for children.

1. FOCUS ON GOOD NUTRITION FOR KIDS

The possibilities for kids’ diets are endless. Should kids have convenience foods? Do their foods need to be organic? Should they eat school lunches? Every family will answer these questions differently for their kids’ nutrition. And that’s a good thing. What matters most is that your child consistently gets the variety of nutrients they need to grow.

Proper nutrition provides essential vitamins, minerals, and nutrients children need for growth and development. This includes the development of bones, muscles, and organs, as well as brain de-

velopment, which is crucial during the early years. Additionally, children are active and constantly growing, which means they need a steady supply of energy. Nutrient-rich foods provide the energy they need to play, learn, and engage in daily activities.

Other benefits of proper nutrition include a strong immune system, improved mood, concentration, and cognitive abilities, and reduced risk of developing chronic diseases such as diabetes, heart disease, and joint problems throughout their life. Good nutrition habits in childhood set the stage for healthy eating behaviors throughout their lives.

What Does Good Nutrition Look Like for Kids

Pediatricians often recommend the following nutrition guidelines to ensure healthy growth and development for kids:

Variety of

Foods:

Include a mix of fruits, vegetables, whole grains, lean proteins, and dairy in your child’s diet. Aim for a colorful plate to ensure a range of nutrients.

Proportionality: Follow the MyPlate guidelines, which suggest making half the plate fruits and vegetables, one-quarter grains (preferably whole grains), and one-quarter protein.

Minimize Added Sugars:

Avoid foods and beverages with added sugars, such as candies, sodas, and sweetened cereals. Opt for naturally sweetened options like fruits.

Reduce Processed Foods: Limit processed and fast foods that are high in unhealthy fats, sodium, and sugars. Choose whole, unprocessed foods as much as possible.

Prioritize Water: Encourage children to drink water throughout the day. Limit sugary drinks like sodas, energy drinks, and fruit juices.

Milk and Dairy: Provide milk or fortified plant-based alternatives to ensure adequate calcium and vitamin D intake for bone health.

Consistent Eating Schedule:

Establish regular meal and snack times to help children maintain energy levels and develop a routine.

Nutritious Snacks: Offer healthy snacks such as fruits, vegetables, nuts, yogurt, and whole-grain crackers instead of chips, cookies, or other highcalorie, low-nutrient options.

Listen to

Hunger Cues:

Teach children to recognize when they are hungry and when they are full. Encourage them to eat slowly and enjoy their food.

Age-Appropriate Portions:

Serve portions that are appropriate for the child’s age and activity level. Avoid forcing children to clean their plates if they are full.

You don’t need to do every one of these all the time, but working toward these pediatrician-recommended guidelines can help develop healthy eating habits that support their growth, development, and overall well-being.

2. GET YOUR KIDS MOVING

It’s no surprise that a healthy body needs movement. As adults, we often think of this as exercise. But a healthier approach, especially for children, is to see how to incorporate movement into your daily life. Shifting the focus from exercise to movement makes it feel less like a chore and more like a lifestyle. Movement allows for things that we enjoy.

Regular physical activity helps build and maintain strong muscles and bones, improves coordination and balance, and enhances overall physical strength. Movement also helps with mental health, brain function, cognitive development, teamwork, cooperation, communication, motor skills, and improved sleep.

Movement Tips for Kids

Encouraging a variety of movement activities can help children develop a love for movement and prevent them from getting bored. Staying active in ways they enjoy will contribute to their overall health and well-being. Anything that helps them move their body is a type of movement. Here are some ideas that are great for kids:

Nature Walks and Hikes: Explore local parks, trails, or nature reserves.

Playground Fun: Visit playgrounds where children can climb, swing, slide, and run freely.

Sports and Team Activities: Try a variety of sports that your child is interested in. Swimming, karate, baseball, and dance are a few of the many sports that promote physical fitness, teamwork, and social skills.

Family Bike Rides: Go for bike rides together as a family. This can be done on bike trails, in parks, or around the neighborhood.

Dance Parties: Have impromptu dance parties at home. Play their favorite music and let them dance around. Make sure you join in the fun!

Tag and Hide-and-Seek: Classic games like tag, hide-and-seek, and capture the flag can get kids moving.

Obstacle Courses: Set up obstacle courses in the backyard or living room using household items for kids to navigate through.

3. MAKE REST A PRIORITY FOR KIDS HEALTH

One of the most overlooked aspects of health for children is adequate rest. With increasingly busy schedules it can be difficult to prioritize sleep. Pediatricians emphasize the importance of sleep for children as it plays a critical role in their overall health, development, and well-being.

Sleep is essential for physical growth, brain development, and the release of growth hormones. Adequate sleep also improves attention, learning, memory, and problem-solving skills. Rest can regulate hunger hormones and support healthy metabolism and immune system, reducing the risk of illness. There are even ties to sleep and behavior.

Help Kids Get Enough Sleep

You can create a supportive environment that promotes healthy sleep habits in your children, setting them up for success in their physical, emotional, and cognitive development. Try these

ideas to help your kids get enough sleep:

• Establish a calming bedtime routine and stick to it

• Set a consistent bedtime and wakeup time, even on weekends

• Make sure the bedroom is conducive to sleep: dark, cool, and quiet

• Avoid screens (TV, computer, tablet, smartphones) at least 1 hour before bedtime

• Encourage regular physical activity during the day

• Try quiet activities before bed to help children relax

• Avoid over-scheduling so kids have downtime

• Model good sleep habits by prioritizing your sleep

A HEALTHY FOUNDATION

When you make good nutrition, movement, and sleep the focus, you will build a foundation for a healthy lifestyle for your kids. You don’t need to be perfect, but being intentional about these three things will help you and your family.

Rebecca Hastings is a former elementary teacher who traded the classroom for writing when she stayed home with her three children. Passionate about authenticity, faith, and family, you can find her at RebeccaHastings.net and on Amazon. In real life, she can often be found typing words, driving her kids places, or wherever there is chocolate.

Expert Advice About How to Select a Pediatrician

Being pregnant with a new baby is exciting and a little scary. Before your baby is born you may feel overwhelmed with information and decisions that you need to make regarding their care. Figuring out who will be your child’s doctor is one of the most important decisions you need to make as a parent.

“Your child’s pediatrician helps nurture and guide your child into adulthood,” says Dr. Ruby Dey, a pediatrician at Kaiser Permanente practicing in Columbia Gateway. “Once you find a practice that seems right for your family, you should schedule a ‘getting to know you’ face-to-face visit.”

As the mom of three kids, I remember this process well. Before my twins were born, I met with a pediatrician and had a list of questions. A lot of people in my community used this doctor and he answered all of my questions, but I didn’t really like his personality. “When choosing a pediatrician, it’s important to trust your instinct,” says Dr. Dey.

I overlooked this “red flag,” ignoring my instincts, and I decided to use him anyway. About six months later my kids had two different issues that he didn’t address, so I switched doctors. Fortunately, my kids are all fine and thriving but hopefully, you won’t have to switch doctors like I did.

“If you don’t click with your pediatrician then you should feel free to change. Don’t feel bad since it happens all the time. Most commonly for insurance reasons, but sometimes for personality reasons,” says Virginia Keane, MD, an attending physician and the director of the Complex Primary Care Program at Mt. Washington Pediatric Hospital in Baltimore, MD.

Here are some tips to help you find a doctor that is a good fit for you and your family.

Ask for Recommendations

“Ask around at your prenatal group, any nurses you know, people at your house of worship or clubs,” says Dr. Keane. She explains that people love to talk about their pediatricians and

will usually steer you in the right direction for who to interview. If you are a new mom in a new community like I was, it may be difficult to find recommendations. Dr. Keane suggests asking your insurance company or checking the web site for the American Academy of Pediatrics to find pediatricians by locale. Even though your baby isn’t born yet, you can join local mom groups either online or in person. Asking these moms who they use for a doctor would be a great place to start your search. I asked people at the gym I went to or friends that I worked with at the time. You can ask your own primary care and OB-GYN for their suggestions. Make sure to interview at least three different doctors to get a broad range of options.

Location

Hopefully, your child will not need to visit the doctor often but, when your child is sick or hurt, you don’t want to have to travel a long distance. One time my son was having trouble breathing due to pneumonia. My doctor’s office was only five minutes away and they told me to bring him in immediately and they gave him a cortisone shot. He was breathing better within minutes, and I was grateful the practice was close to our house.

Experience

This is a tough one because I’ve dealt with experienced doctors that were so rigid that they misdiagnosed an issue. I’ve also seen new doctors that made mistakes due to their inexperience. But Dr. Dey says that being new to the field might not matter. “Keep in mind that if a pediatrician doesn’t have much experience, they can consult with their more experienced peers if needed,” she says. “At Kaiser Permanente our pediatricians are part of a large multispecialty practice with access to hundreds of experienced pediatricians and specialists.”

You might not be concerned about the length of time they have been practicing but you can make sure they are boardcertified as a pediatrician by The American Board of Pediatrics.

“Experience is helpful, but not essential. Young pediatricians enter the practice with enthusiasm and new scientific knowledge that can overcome a lack of experience, especially if there is a more senior doctor in the practice to whom they can turn to with questions,” says Dr. Keane.

Personality

I think a doctor’s personality matters the most when selecting a pediatrician. “Personality is a factor in choosing a pediatrician. If you don’t click then it’s probably not going to work. This is a person a parent needs to trust with their most precious, beloved child,” says Dr. Keane.

As a new parent, you will have lots of questions and concerns. You want to feel as if you can trust your doctor to communicate with you effectively and to listen to your concerns. If you get a sense, like I did, that your personality doesn’t mesh with your doctor’s, then pay attention to that red flag and find a doctor that is a good fit. My kid’s current pediatrician is one of the best doctors I’ve ever encountered. She is patient, understanding and always listens to my concerns.

“I would suggest that parents go with their gut feeling about their perception of any given provider,” says Brad Harris, MD, a pediatrician at Mt. Washington Pediatric Hospital in Baltimore, MD.

Red Flags

Dr. Keane says that you should be on the lookout for these possible red flags: short hours, multiple offices, hard to get through to on the phone, lost their license, even if they got it back. “If people say they have trouble getting referrals or they aren’t sure their doctor listens to them or takes them seriously then consider how you would feel if that were you,” she says.

Dr. Harris also says to be wary of pediatricians that are not willing to answer your questions or cutting you off when you speak. And Dr. Dey says, “A pediatrician is a good fit if you can engage in open, honest conversations about your child’s health.”

Interview Questions

Before you select a doctor, you should set up an interview to ask them questions so that you can get a sense of their personality and values. While you are there, you should pay attention to the waiting room, office and patients. Is it clean? Are there a lot of people waiting? Here are some questions you could ask: Why did you decide to be a pediatrician? What hours do you work?

Am I able to see you the same day for a sick visit?

What if I need to see a specialist and how is that handled?

What hospitals are you affiliated with?

What if I disagree with your diagnosis? How would you respond?

What is your philosophy about vaccines, breastfeeding, antibiotics, counseling, discipline, and medications?

What are the practice’s policies towards vaccination? What is the availability of sick visit appointments? How are the after-hours calls handled? Answering service, nurse call line?

What are the cancellation and no-show policies?

Making the Decision

Now that you have gathered information, you need to decide which doctor is the best to treat your child. Hopefully, you were able to interview at least three different doctors at various practices.

continued on page 30

Growing up in the 1980s, I was a typical angsty adolescent who worried about homework, grades and fitting in with peers. But most of all, I worried about how my body looked.

My calves were knobby, my hair frizzy from countless hours in chlorinated pools. I lamented my splotchy skin and my short, stocky frame, which looked nothing like the dewy-faced, willowy models in Seventeen Magazine

I was close to my mother, an unfussy eater who never, to my knowledge, went on a diet. So, whenever I complained about my appearance, my mom didn’t try to talk me out of my feelings. Instead, her usual reaction was, “Honey, your body is just fine.” Then we’d move on.

Decades later, I have two daughters of my own, and we’re navigating the rocky terrain of body image together. So recently, when I heard the term “body neutrality” on a podcast, I thought of my mother’s relaxed, non-judgmental approach — and I wanted to learn more.

What Is Body Neutrality?

The concept of body neutrality wasn’t widely known until 2015, gaining popularity after Anne Poirier published a book, “The Body Joyful,” using the term. Today, health coaches and fitness instructors are embracing it, as are celebrities, including musician Lizzo and actor Jameela Jamil.

“Body neutrality is letting your body look and be the way it is, and it doesn’t have to mean anything,” says Pam Moore, a certified intuitive eating coach and occupational therapist in Colorado.

We may dislike the shape of our noses or how our jeans fit, but we still treat our bodies with respect — and our self-worth isn’t connected to how our bodies look or perform.

“From a clear place, you can see that your body is the least interesting and important thing about you,” says Jessi Kneeland, a North Carolina body image coach and author of the forthcoming book Body Neutral: A Revolutionary Guide to Overcoming Body Image Issues.

Kneeland compares body neutrality to walking past a messy or unattractive part of your home. You might think the

— by Gina Rich

The Value of Body Neutrality

room could use a fresh coat of paint or deep cleaning, but this thought doesn’t ruin your day.

Similarly, parts of your body might bother you, but “they don’t have the power to cause you inappropriate suffering,” says Kneeland.

Notably, body neutrality differs from body positivity, which dates back to the 1960s and promotes the idea that all bodies are beautiful. The movement began when the National Association to Aid Fat Americans (now called the National Association to Advance Fat Acceptance) advocated for people in larger bodies.

Over the years, body positivity has been a recurrent theme in popular culture, from Dove’s Real Beauty advertising campaigns to ubiquitous social media hashtags like “body-positivity” and “love your body.”

The Body Positivity Problem

Though body positivity can be empowering, it’s not for everyone — and many people have been harmed by it, says Kneeland. If someone has struggled with body image for years, telling them to love their curves and stop caring what others think is far from an instant cure.

One downside of body positivity is that it can layer guilt and shame on top of whatever challenges a person is already facing. For example, when you don’t like what you see in the mirror, the next thought becomes, “Oh my God, I’m

supposed to be body-positive; I’m not supposed to think that,” Moore says. There is an unwritten rule among women my age: We must not speak negatively about our bodies. If one of us should say something degrading about how we look, the knee-jerk response is, “But don’t say that! You’re beautiful!” It’s almost verboten to describe ourselves as anything less than stunning. But too often, that approach feels inauthentic and doesn’t help. Considering the narrow definitions of beauty we’ve absorbed throughout our lives, “it’s unreasonable to imagine that you’re going to flip a switch one day and just suddenly be, like, ‘I love my body,’” says Moore.

At its core, body positivity “still focuses on the superficial of, ‘I look this way,’ as opposed to, ‘I am a good person,’ or ‘I have all these good qualities,’” says Marley Blonsky, co-founder of All Bodies on Bikes, a body-neutral, inclusive cycling community-based in Arkansas.

“It encourages people to love inconsequential parts of their bodies,” says Blonsky.

Practicing Body Neutrality

Body neutrality can help us relate to our physical selves differently. While getting to that place takes time, we can move toward it.

continued on page 30

THE VALUE OF BODY NEUTRALITY

“The first step is to become conscious of what meaning you’re assigning to the thing you dislike,” says Kneeland. For instance, someone who hates their legs may believe that thin, toned legs will translate to being accepted, desired, and loved. But getting those needs met and feeling worthy of love has nothing to do with our bodies.

When talking with kids, adopt an approach of “non-judgmental curiosity,” says Moore. If your child (or grandchild) says they hate their stomach or their thighs are too big, ask why they feel that way or what prompted the thought.

“I think the fear is that if we go there and talk about it, we’ll somehow make it worse,” she says. But with my daughters, who are 11 and 13, I’ve found it helpful to invite more questions.

Another way to shift your thinking is to look critically at mainstream beauty standards and point out unrealistic examples. If you’re watching a show where many actors look like supermodels, talk about why that might be the case, says Moore.

People may have had surgical or cosmetic work, or perhaps they’re genetically in smaller bodies. Is that an Instagram photo of what someone looks like, or are they wearing a lot of makeup and using a filter? What we consider beautiful may not be real.

Moore also suggests using “add-on” thoughts to help counter the shame spiral that can happen when we’re focused on something we dislike about our bodies.

If we hate how our stomach looks on a particular day, it’s easy to slip into moral judgments: We’re not disciplined enough with exercise or didn’t eat the right foods.

An alternative response is to follow up that first thought with a more neutral statement that’s still true. For example, we might try, “I don’t love my stomach today – and I don’t have to,” says Moore.

Ultimately, says Blonsky, “none of us are guaranteed these bodies tomorrow, so we should focus on other aspects of ourselves that will still be here.” I’m keeping that advice in mind.

Though my body image struggles are different now than when I was younger, there are still challenges. And in a culture saturated with highly positive and negative narratives about our bodies, I want my kids to know there is another option.

On a recent night, my younger daughter and I were in the bathroom doing skincare. “Mom,” she said, “is it okay if I don’t like my stomach?” She looked wary as she eyed her midsection.

I paused, tempted to tell her that this was silly, that her body was beautiful and perfect. But, instead, I said, “Yes,

it’s okay not to always like your body. Look, I have a big scar on my tummy that I don’t love. But your body isn’t the most important thing about you — far from it.”

She nodded, satisfied. And we moved on with our evening.

Originally published by Next Avenue on January 9, 2023

Gina Rich lives in Wisconsin, where she writes about parenting, health, and the natural world. Her work appears in the Washington Post, Notre Dame Magazine, Next Avenue, and other outlets. Connect with Rich on her website lovehopeandcoffee.com.

HOW TO SELECT A PEDIATRICIAN

If you felt like all the doctors answered your questions appropriately, then it comes down to the doctor that you feel would communicate well with you and listen to your concerns. “Parents and providers need to have a good chemistry,” says Dr. Harris. If you end up having a negative experience, then remember it is easy to switch to another doctor as I did.

“A good pediatric practice will function as a medical home, providing care that is comprehensive, patient centered, coordinated, easy to access and committed to quality and safety,” says Dr. Keane.

Dr Dey agrees with Dr. Keane and says, “At the end of the day, you need to love your pediatrician. If you don’t, keep looking.”

Cheryl Maguire holds a Master of Counseling Psychology degree. She is married and is the mother of twins and a daughter. Her writing has been published in The New York Times, National Geographic, The Washington Post, Parents Magazine, AARP, Healthline, Your Teen Magazine and many other publications. She is a professional member of ASJA. You can find on X @CherylMaguire05

— by Sandi Schwartz

Listen Up:

Are Your Child’s Headphones Safe?

We are always looking for ways to keep our kids quiet and entertained during a long car ride. Whether they are listening to music, playing video games, or watching a movie in the back seat, they are most likely wearing headphones. Have you ever wondered if this is safe for their ears?

WHY IT’S A PROBLEM

With the explosion of smartphones, portable gaming systems, and media players, more children and teenagers are listening to ear buds and headphones at dangerously high volumes that can damage their hearing. According to the American Osteopathic Association, one in five teens has some form of hearing loss. This rate is about 30 percent higher than it was in the 1990s. Many experts believe this change is due to the increased use of headphones.

Listening to devices at levels greater than 80 decibels (dB) for extended periods of time may be dangerous. Over time, the hair cells in the ear start to break down because they are not receiving proper blood flow and oxygen. This essentially exhausts the auditory system, causing hearing loss. Unfortunately, hearing loss is permanent and cannot be reversed. Even mild hearing loss due to excessive noise could lead to developmental delays in speech and language.

Children are especially susceptible to this damage because they are not aware of the dangers and do not fully understand what it means to be too loud. How our children listen to their music and other devices can greatly impact their chance of having hearing issues down the road. Unfortunately, according to the American Speech-LanguageHearing Association, experts predict a rise in hearing loss nationally due to unsafe use of personal audio devices.

WHAT TO WATCH OUT FOR

How will you know if the headphones are affecting your child’s hearing? According to the American Osteopathic Association, the type of hearing loss due to headphones is usually gradual over a long period of time and without obvious warning signs.

The only way to determine if your child has hearing loss is to have them undergo a thorough hearing test and medical examination by a hearing specialist. If your child experiences any of the following symptoms, it is a good idea to have them evaluated:

• Ringing, roaring, hissing or buzzing in the ear.

• Difficulty understanding speech in noisy places or places with poor acoustics.

• Muffled sounds and a feeling that the ear is plugged.

• Listening to the TV or radio at a higher volume than in the past.

HOW TO PROTECT YOUR CHILD

You do not have to ban your children from ever using headphones again. By taking the following important steps, you can help protect them from damaging their ears.

Choose External Headphones

Experts suggest that children use larger, external headphones that rest over the ear opening as opposed to ear buds that are placed directly in the ear. External headphones consist of small speakers that are held close to the ear, while ear buds focus sound more directly into the ear. Ear buds also allow more background noise to seep in, so children often turn up the volume to compensate, causing more damage to their ears. Additionally, ear buds are not typically designed for children’s smaller ears, which can prevent them from hearing properly.

Try Noise Cancelling Headphones

Background noises can be distracting to headphone listeners. Their first reaction to this extra sound is to turn the volume up, drowning out the unwanted noise. Children especially tend to do this. By investing in high-quality noise reduction headphones that cover the entire ear, you can solve this problem. They will keep outside noise from interfering with the sound coming out of the headphones and eliminate the need to turn the volume up to dangerous levels.

Set Specific Volume Limits

Most MP3 players can produce sounds up to 120 dB, which is the equivalent to a rock concert. At that level, hearing loss can occur after only about an hour and 15 minutes! The general consensus among experts is that children should avoid extended exposure to volumes above 80 dB. Studies show that decibels beyond this level—for even short periods of time—can result in hearing loss. By keeping below 80 dB, children can safely listen for about eight hours without damage.

Although the maximum volume limit is adjustable on many devices, your children may be able to disable the function and increase the volume on their

continued on page 32

own. It is critical to set strict guidelines about the maximum volume level allowable in order to protect their hearing.

Look For Headphones Designed Especially For Children

Some headphones on the market are designed to keep the volume at a safe level to prevent noise induced hearing loss. Look for headphones with a builtin volume limiter to prevent sound levels from exceeding 80 dB.

Limit Listening Time

The amount of time your children spend on their headphones plays a major factor in how their hearing is impacted. Moderation is key in protecting your children’s ears. Avoiding excessive use of listening devices will go a long way in preventing hearing loss. Monroe Carell Jr. Children’s Hospital at Vanderbilt University suggests the “60/60 rule” to use as a guideline. This means using only 60 percent of the device’s volume level for no more than 60 minutes at a time. After 60 minutes, your children should give their ears a break for at least an hour.

Monitor Use

Educate your children about the risks of listening to their devices too loudly. Explain to them how important it is to be aware of the volume level. Check in periodically to make sure your child is keeping the sound at a safe volume. You should be able to gauge the volume just by standing next to them while they are wearing headphones. If you can hear sound coming from the headphones, then it is too loud. Also, make sure to check the volume setting on the device.

Sandi Schwartz is an award-winning author, freelance journalist, and mother of two. She has written extensively about parenting, wellness, and environmental issues. As the founder and director of the Ecohappiness Project, her mission is to inspire and educate families to build a nature habit to feel happier and calmer. Both her parenting book, Finding Ecohappiness: Fun Nature Activities to Help Your Kids Feel Happier and Calmer, and children’s book, Sky’s Search for Ecohappiness, are available now. Learn more at www.ecohappinessproject.com.

Why Summer is the Best Time to Take Your Child to an Orthodontist

(StatePoint)

Barbecues, beaches and braces? Summertime may not typically be associated with orthodontics, but according to experts, it’s a great time of year to start orthodontic treatment and help kids enter a new school year with a confident smile.

“Braces can be a very exciting step, but like with anything new, there will be a short adjustment period as a child adapts to changes to their routine, as well as to the feel of aligners or brackets and wires in their mouth,” says Dr. Vijay Bhagia of Space City Orthodontics, a board-certified orthodontist who has been practicing for over 20 years. “That’s why we recommend parents bring their kids into our offices in summer, when schedules are more relaxed and they have more time to adjust to the change of pace.”

Whether you’re considering orthodontic treatment for your child, your teen or yourself, these insights from Smile Doctors, a national network of leading orthodontists, can help:

Is orthodontic treatment really necessary?

Straightening teeth through orthodontics is not just cosmetic. Poorly

aligned teeth can affect the way one speaks, bites and chews and even breathes. An important part of oral health, braces can correct bite issues, gaps and crooked, crowded or overlapping teeth.

When

should my child see an orthodontist?

Orthodontics is for people of all ages — even adults. However, it might be surprising to learn that the American Association of Orthodontics recommends children see an orthodontist by age 7. This is because orthodontists are uniquely trained to evaluate children’s growth, as well as the exchange of baby teeth for permanent teeth, and can help you get ahead of potential issues as adult teeth continue to come in.

How

do I get my teen on board with the plan?

Teens now have more braces options than ever. From traditional braces with fun colors, to clear aligners like Invisalign, braces can help them express their personality. Of course, it also helps to remind teenagers that when they’re done with treatment, they’ll have a healthy smile.

How do I know which braces are right for me or my child?

There are several types of orthodontic treatments. Metal braces use a combination of stainless-steel brackets, arch wires and elastic ties or bands to gently move teeth as prescribed. Ceramic braces are tooth-colored or clear brackets made of ceramic, porcelain, or plastic. Clear aligners like Invisalign are a removable and discreet orthodontic treatment consisting of a series of aligners worn for 1-2 weeks at a time. Some orthodontists, including those within the Smile Doctors network, will provide a free consultation to discuss affordability and treatment options that best suit your needs.

What steps

should we take between visits?

Have your child brush around each bracket and floss between each tooth right after eating to avoid permanent white marks, cavities, or gum disease. Doing so prevents the acidity and sugars from settling into the crevices in between the brackets. Opt for mouthwash without blue or red dyes for further cavity protection.

Do braces hurt?

There is sometimes mild discomfort during treatment, but it’s manageable with over-the-counter pain relievers. To reduce swelling, try rinsing with warm salt water. For bracket pain, your orthodontist will usually give you dental wax and show you how to apply it. You can also avoid some discomfort by sticking with softer foods at first.

Smile Doctors has more than 430 affiliated locations in 29 states and is the largest Invisalign provider in the world. To find a leading orthodontist near you, visit smiledoctors.com.

Use the downtime of summer wisely this year. Put your child on the path toward a healthy, confident smile that will last a lifetime.

What Every Mom and Soon-to-be-Mom Needs to Know About Their Heart

(StatePoint)

Over the last three decades, the United States has seen pregnancy-related deaths rise nearly 140%, and heart disease continues to be the leading cause. Furthermore, women who have prenatal complications, such as high blood pressure or gestational diabetes, have a significantly higher risk of heart disease and stroke later in life, yet many are not getting the care they need.

According to the National Collaborative for Infants & Toddlers (NCIT), an advocacy collaborative working to pass policies that make it possible for all expectant parents, infants and toddlers to thrive, the United States is in the midst of a maternal health crisis.

This sentiment is echoed by “Opportunities in the Postpartum Period to Reduce Cardiovascular Disease Risk Following Adverse Pregnancy Outcomes,” a new scientific statement from

the American Heart Association (AHA), which was recently published in “Circulation,” the Association’s flagship peerreviewed journal.

“Healthcare professionals and the public alike often think of heart disease as a man’s disease. While heart disease is also the leading cause of death for women, fewer than 50% of women identify it as such. This is creating a dangerous situation for women, especially during higher-risk periods of their life, as their symptoms often go undiagnosed and untreated,” says Dr. Sadiya S. Khan, one of the statement’s authors. “As adverse pregnancy outcomes become increasingly common, it’s important for women to be aware of their risk for heart disease, the actions they can take to lower their risk if they experience pregnancy complications, and for birth justice policy interventions to take place that will improve their care during their pregnancy, and throughout their lifetimes.”

Many women face significant barriers in accessing primary care after delivery. Up to 40% of women do not access postpartum care, and only an estimated 18% to 25% of postpartum patients with pregnancy complications or chronic health conditions are seen by a primary care clinician within 6 months of delivery. Women of color, and women in rural areas are disproportionately impacted by barriers to care that could leave them vulnerable to further health complications.

According to NCIT, policy interventions such as expanded Medicaid coverage for 12 months postpartum in all states, expanded income eligibility for health insurance programs, paid family and medical leave, community-based doulas, and evidence-based home visiting programs can help promote ethnic, racial and socioeconomic birth equity, and help ensure all expectant and new parents have access to insurance, care and the supports needed to thrive.

Also supporting women in all stages of life, and all stages of pregnancy is Go Red for Women, an AHA initiative empowering women to take charge of their heart health. One way they can do that, according to the initiative, is by understanding their heart disease risks, and coming to their doctors’ appointments prepared to discuss their personal and family health history and other factors that could impact their chance of a healthy pregnancy. Women can also proactively manage their heart disease risk factors during pregnancy and after delivery using the AHA’s Life Essential 8 cardiovascular health metrics as a framework. These include: eating better, being more active, quitting tobacco, getting healthy sleep, managing weight, controlling cholesterol, managing blood sugar and managing blood pressure.

“Stemming the tide of this maternal health crisis is vital for families, and it starts with bringing light to the tremendous need for better delivery of care to moms and soon-to-be moms with a focus on heart health,” says Dr. Khan.

Adult and Childhood Diabetes

Today, more than a third of all American adults have diabetes or prediabetes, according to the American Diabetes Association (ADA). Also, 208,000 children and teens under the age of 20 have been diagnosed, reveals the National Institutes of Health. But this is only the tip of the iceberg.

A study by the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) found that if incidence rates remain steady, childhood type 2 diabetes in the U.S. is expected to increase by 49% by the year 2050. Those with type 1 will also increase by 23%. Still worse, if the current incidence rate increases, the percentages could quadruple and triple, respectively, says the CDC.

So being aware of the causes and symptoms of diabetes and knowing how to reduce your risk are crucial to yours and your family’s health.

CAUSES AND RISK FACTORS

Understanding the causes of a disease is essential to prevention. However, researchers still don’t know the exact cause of type 1 diabetes. Mayo Clinic explains that medical researchers believe it results from a combination of heredity and environmental factors. These include exposure to a virus, low vitamin D consumption, or early exposure to cereal or cow’s milk. These factors aren’t direct causes of the disease but may play a role when combined with other genetic and unknown factors.

Mayo Clinic says with type 2 diabetes, “your immune system — which normally fights harmful bacteria or viruses — attacks and destroys your insulin-producing cells in the pancreas.” As a result, you’re left with little to no insulin. So, sugar builds up in your bloodstream rather than going into your cells as it should.

The cause of type 2 diabetes and prediabetes isn’t fully understood either. But medical researchers do know several factors play a role. These include:

• family history

• weight

• race

ADULT AND CHILDHOOD DIABETES IS AT AN ALL-TIME HIGH

• age

• inactivity

• high blood pressure

• polycystic ovary syndrome

• abnormal cholesterol and triglyceride levels

During pregnancy, some women are also at increased risk. Gestational diabetes has several factors. These include a family history of diabetes, being over the age of 25, or being overweight before pregnancy. Non-Caucasian women are also at increased risk.

HOW TO REDUCE YOUR RISK

There are several things adults and kids can do to reduce their risk of type 2 diabetes. Prevention all boils down

to these five words, explains Harvard School of Public Health (HSPH): “Stay lean and stay active.” More specifically, HSPH recommends you:

• Control your weight

• Be active

• Eliminate sugary drinks

• Eat good fats and reduce bad fats

• Eat whole grains rather than highly processed carbohydrates

• Reduce or eliminate red and processed meat. Instead, eat fish, poultry, and nuts

• Drink alcohol in moderation only, one drink a day for women and two for men

• Quit smoking

SYMPTOMS

According to the CDC, there are several symptoms to watch for that could indicate either type 1 or type 2 diabetes. Being aware of these is crucial, so you can seek early treatment and prevent a medical emergency such as diabetic shock. Symptoms include:

• Heavy thirst

• Frequent urination, particularly at night

• Excessive hunger

• Tiredness

• Dry skin

• Unexplained weight loss

• Blurred vision

• Tingling or numbness in hands and feet

• Recurrent infections

• Slow-healing sores

For type 1 diabetes, additional symptoms that may be present include stomach pain, nausea, and vomiting.

This form of diabetes typically develops between childhood and young adulthood, although it can have a later onset.

Type 2 diabetes, on the other hand, may or may not show any symptoms. At one time, type 2 was primarily an adult disease. In recent decades, as childhood obesity has become more common, type 2 diabetes has become more prevalent in kids.

As for gestational diabetes, typically, there are no symptoms. Therefore, testing during pregnancy is a routine procedure.

CARE AND TREATMENT

Anyone with type 1 diabetes will require constant monitoring and insulin therapy for the rest of their life. Insulin is administered via injection or an insulin pump. Another method of insulin delivery for those 14-years-old and over is through an artificial pancreas in which blood sugar levels are monitored, and insulin is automatically delivered as needed.

Those with type 1 diabetes may require other medications as well. These include aspirin, cholesterol-lowering medications, and high blood pressure medications.

Diet and exercise, similar to the recommendations for preventing type 2 diabetes, is also an essential part of the treatment for type 1.

Treatment for type 2 diabetes requires some monitoring of blood sugar levels. While some people with type 2 need insulin or other medication to control it, many people can control the disease with diet and exercise alone. The good news for those with type 2 diabetes is that with a proper diet and an active lifestyle, the condition can go into remission.

While all factors that play a role in diabetes may not be within our control, most factors are, particularly for type 2 diabetes. So, leading a healthy lifestyle and making necessary changes to do so can substantially reduce your risk for the disease.

PICK OF THE LITERATURE

— by Dr. Donna Phillips

July is the month in the year when we pause to celebrate and reflect on our country, its past and future. We seem to be at a tipping point for our country, yet this is really nothing new. We have been through tumult and uncertainty before. We have read about it, seen it in movies and documentaries, and studied it in school. This is the time to try to rise above the current din and distraction and get a larger perspective. Books can help us do this. They can help our children learn more about the events and the people who shaped them. They can also help them understand that they are more than just observers of history. They are shapers of history. They are history.

America’s Dreaming (Penguin Workshop, New Yor, 2024, $19.99), written by Bob McKinnon and illustrated by Thai My Phucng, is a

story about learning to be part of a community through the lives of historical figures in our country and their attempts to find their own place and purpose. As America explores the books the classroom teacher provides about the struggles of Amelia Earhart, Sojourner Truth, Martin Luther King, and Emma Lazarus, the messages of possibility, tenacity, and acceptance are revealed. While these might seem complicated, the author and illustrator have managed to orchestrate a tribute to kindness, acceptance, and encouragement that everyone can understand and appreciate. From the classroom to the community and into history, everyone plays a part in making our country what it is and what it will become.

Multitalented Brad Meltzer has written another wonderful book in his series for young children. You Can Change the

World: Inspiration for Future Heroes (Rocky Pond Books, New York, 2024, $9.99), illustrated by Christopher Eliopoulos, shares the stories of scientists, artists, musicians, presidents, authors, athletes, explorers, and other historical figures. Their vision, determination, imagination, and their inner drive to explore and share their gifts with the world is remarkably inspiring and encouraging. For children searching for their place in school, the community, or the world, this book is a perfect starting point. He encourages the reader to view themselves and ordinary people who make history. “History isn’t just something that goes backwards. History goes forward too… that’s something waiting to be written.” This is a book that can inspire children and empower them to follow their talents and their dreams and that is part of the American Dream that we celebrate this month.

We have an upcoming election that is going to be in the forefront of the news, and in our minds and conversations. As we educate our children about the importance of this process, Presidential Elections and Other Cool Facts (Sourcebooks, Naperville, 2024, $9.99) by Syl Sobel might be the book you are seeking to help you. It includes chapters on The Rules for Electing the President, The Electoral College, The continued on page 40

Presidential Campaign, a chapter on What If Something Happens to the President? and other interesting facts about first ladies, famous firsts, and other intriguing tidbits. Written in a clear and easily understandable style, it is certain to entertain and educate both children and parents.

The Smithsonian has created a stunning masterpiece. American History: A Visual Encyclopedia (DK Publishers, New York, 2024, $19.99) is written by Davis C. King and illustrated with images and insets of photographs, artwork, maps, charts, timelines, and artifacts that will engage the reader for the entire summer and beyond. Contents include Two Worlds Meet 1000-1607; Colonial America 1607-1763; Creating a New Nation 1763-1800; America Grows 1800-1850; The Union Shattered 18501876; Westward Expansion 1869-1900; America’s Industrial Age 1865-1900; The Progressive Era 1900-1920; America Becomes World Power 1898-1920; America’s “Golden” Decade 19201929; The Great Depression 1929-1939; World War II 19391945; Cold War Anxiety 1945-1960; Turbulent Times 19601969; War and Protest 1970-1979, The Global Age 1980-1991, Bridges to the Future 1992-1999, A New Millenium 2000-2023. This is the ultimate book that explores the enormity of our history and the celebration of our country. It also inspires us to wonder…what is next?

So, what is next for US? We have a history that is rich with people, events, opportunities, and challenges for individuals and communities to become greater than the sum of its parts. Time will tell what and where we will be in a year, a decade, a century, a millennium… If history teaches us anything, it is that we will evolve and thrive.

Happy Birthday USA!

Dr. Donna Phillips is an associate professor in the College of Education at Niagara University where her specialty is literacy and children’s literature. She lives on Grand Island, NY and is the mother of two adult children and the grandmother of one.

RAISING DIGITAL KIDS

— by Mike Daugherty

My Child is a Hacker?! Help!!

Hollywood often glorifies the enigmatic and daring world of computer hackers. Typically depicted as brilliant yet devious tech experts, hackers in movies are shown effortlessly bypassing security systems and outwitting authorities with a few keystrokes. It's easy to see how kids passionate about technology might be drawn to this glamorous but misleading image.

Raising a tech-savvy child can be both rewarding and challenging. On the one hand, their skills can keep your family's digital devices running smoothly. On the other hand, guiding them towards positive uses of their talents can be tricky, especially when they dive into the complexities of “geek speak.” Let's explore how parents can help their budding hackers navigate potential pitfalls and harness their abilities for good. The cybersecurity industry offers promising career opportunities for those with the right skills.

UNDERSTANDING DIFFERENT TYPES OF HACKERS

Hackers are generally categorized into three types. Black hat hackers are the cybercriminals. Motivated by personal gain, they exploit security vulnerabilities to steal information, cause damage, or hold systems for ransom. These are the individuals behind the cyberattacks and ransomware incidents we often hear about in the news.

Gray hat hackers occupy a more ambiguous middle ground. They use similar techniques to black hat hackers to find security flaws, but their actions are not always malicious. They might inform an organization of a vulnerability and demand payment

to fix it, sometimes threatening to expose the flaw publicly if not compensated. While not always intending harm, their methods are ethically questionable.

White hat hackers, or “ethical hackers,” operate within the bounds of the law. They use their skills to help organizations strengthen their security by identifying and fixing vulnerabilities. White hat hackers are often employed by companies and government agencies to conduct penetration testing and to investigate breaches. This is a legitimate and respected career path in cybersecurity.

LEARNING OPPORTUNITIES FOR YOUNG HACKERS

Encouraging formal education is crucial for young tech enthusiasts. Even self-taught prodigies benefit from structured learning. Unfortunately, most K-12 schools don't offer courses in ethical hacking, so parents must seek out external resources. Online platforms like Udemy and Cybrary offer affordable, self-paced courses that can provide a solid foundation. These courses lack real-time interaction, so students may need additional support to address their questions and challenges.

Finding local, instructor-led courses can offer a more engaging learning experience, though these are harder to come by. Additionally, investing in a separate computer for practice at home can help your child develop their skills safely.

ENGAGING IN HACKING COMPETITIONS

Hacking competitions provide a practical and exciting way for students to apply their knowledge. Events like capture the flag and hackathons challenge participants to solve security problems and defend against cyberattacks in a controlled environment. These competitions can be team-based or individual and often offer prizes ranging from cash to scholarships.

Parents can explore Major League Hacking's website mlh. io for a comprehensive list of upcoming competitions, both virtual and in-person. Searching online for local events, such as "hacking competition New York 2024," can also yield valuable opportunities for young hackers to showcase their skills.

ACADEMIC PATHWAYS AND CERTIFICATIONS

The cybersecurity field is projected to grow by 33% over the next decade, with median salaries reaching the low six figures. Colleges and universities are expanding their cybersecurity programs. For instance, Tulane University offers a Masters of Professional Studies in Cybersecurity, while the University of Cincinnati provides courses through their cyber range initiative. Prospective students should consider majors in:

● Computer Science

● Computer Programming

continued on page 48

Family Movie Options: In Theaters and Streaming Online

Inside Out 2

The Garfield Movie

When Riley turns thirteen, the console in her head resets, leaving Joy and the familiar emotions unexpectedly displaced by Anxiety, Envy, Embarrassment, and Ennui. Anxiety highjacks the board and changes Riley’s behavior, putting pressure on Joy to help Riley rediscover her sense of self. As with the original film, this is a tender, insightful story, brimming over with empathy for young teens. It’s also clean, family friendly, and full of laughs for viewers of all ages

Photo ©Walt Disney Studios Motion Pictures

Garfield’s lazy life with Jon and pet dog Odie is rudely interrupted when the two animals are kidnapped. The pair find themselves facing an evil mastermind – and then Garfield’s father, who abandoned him as a kitten. That story turns out to be more complicated than Garfield knew, and it changes his perspective on life. Filled with implausible scenarios and slapstick violence, this film is an upgrade, delivering messages about friendship, courage, family, forgiveness, and love.

Photo ©Sony Pictures Entertainment Motion Picture Group

Dr. Ming Wang is an ophthalmologist famous for helping hopeless cases. But when he struggles to save the sight of a young girl, he finds himself confronting the ghosts of the past. As the movie weaves back and forth between Dr. Wang’s medical practice and his perilous life during China’s Cultural Revolution, it provides examples of bravery, integrity, sacrifice, and the power of education. The story goes further than expected, not only lauding success but also demonstrating the growth that can come from failure . Photo ©Angel Studios

After he buys a DIY robot kit, Dog becomes fast friends with his new creation, enjoying the delights of 1990s New York City. Then a day at the beach results in Robot rusting in place, dreaming over the winter as Dog frets. Nominated for an Oscar, this touching, heartfelt film will please adults as much as children. It is devoid of dialogue, which pulls attention onto the deceptively simple, vibrant animation. This sweet movie is recommended for kids and adults Photo ©Neon

It’s been 70 years since D-Day, but 89-year-old pensioner Bernard Jordan hasn’t forgotten. When he misses the official Royal British Legion trip to Normandy, Bernie slips away from his care home and makes his own way to France. Based on a true story, this is a poignant film, filled with pathos, love, forgiveness, humor, hard-earned wisdom, and patience for the foibles of everyday people. This British movie didn’t release in American theaters and is not streaming, but it is available on DVD and Blu-ray Photo ©Warner Bros

DEAR TEACHER

– by Peggy Gisler and Marge Eberts

Helping all parents make their children’s educational experience as successful as possible

What Parents Can Do to Keep their School Children Safe

Parents: Next month many children will be returning to school. You can ensure that it is a safe experience for them by making sure that they know basic safety rules for walking to school, taking the school bus, and avoiding the use of drugs and contact with children with weapons. The safety precaution steps that you talk about with your children will naturally depend on their age. While your aim is to help them avoid danger, you certainly don’t want to overemphasize any dangers that they might face as it could actually make them afraid of going to school.

Safety Tips for Walking to School

Parents or other adults simply need to walk young children in the early grades to school. Most children under the age of 8 cannot be trusted to be cautious around traffic. It is helpful to have a group of adult neighbors form a walking group. The adults need to follow all traffic safety laws and teach about traffic signs and signals and how to cross a street so the children will absorb the correct behaviors.

Around the age of 10, most children are ready to walk to school without adult supervision. You should review the following precautions about walking to school without adults, whether the children are first-timers or have been doing it for several years:

• It is best for all children, no matter their age, to walk to

school with at least one other child.

• Make sure that they know the safe route to schools that have crossing guards at intersections and will avoid taking any shortcuts. It is smart to practice this safe route with them several times before they tackle it alone.

• And very importantly, impress upon them the need to say “no” to anyone offering a ride or asking for directions. And if necessary, they should yell and run for help.

• As an added precaution, have them wear brightly colored clothing and backpacks when it is dark in the morning or afternoon.

School Bus Safety Tips

School buses are among the safest modes of transportation. The time when children are at risk is when approaching or leaving a school bus. When a large group of children or younger children are at a bus stop, it is wise for an adult to be present to avoid dangerous behaviors like pushing or shoving to line up for the bus or other high jinks. No matter their age, make sure your children understand these precautions to keep them safe:

• Before the school year starts, show younger children where

they should stand to wait for the bus. They should be at least six feet (three giant steps) away from the curb until the bus has stopped and the door opened.

• Arrive at the bus stop five minutes before the bus is scheduled to arrive.

• Never walk behind a school bus.

• If it is necessary to cross the street in front of the bus, children should be at least ten feet (five giant steps) in front of the bus. And they need to make sure the bus driver can see them. Bus drivers may walk younger children across the street.

• Emphasize they must never try to pick up an object that they have dropped by the bus. Instead, they must tell the bus driver.

Educating Your Children about Avoiding Drugs at School

Unfortunately, in this day and age, some children may be bringing drugs to your children’s school as early as elementary school and trying to entice them to take drugs. You should talk to them about why drugs are bad in an ageappropriate way before they start school. And it is very important that children of all ages know how to turn down drugs that may be offered to them. Teach them that just saying, “no” is a good answer. Also, make sure they know not to consume unfamiliar items.

Children, especially younger ones, need to know that inhaling substances is another form of drug abuse. Because inhalants are common products like cooking spray, aerosol whipping cream, felt tip markers, glues, and rubber cement, they are easy to obtain. You need to stress how dangerous inhalants can be — sometimes killing individuals the first time they are used. Again, children may

try to entice your children into using them by telling them they are safe.

Handling Seeing Weapons at School

Students may bring a gun, knife, or other weapons to school for attention, protection, or harming others. It is extremely distressful that parents have to have a discussion with their children about how to handle a situation in which a student has one of these objects. Here is an approach to tell your children about what to do if they see or are told about a weapon.

1. They need to get away from that person quickly and non-confrontationally.

2. They need to tell a teacher, coach, or administrator immediately what they have seen or been told. If no adult is available, they need to call 911. Students need not be afraid of telling what they have heard or seen because schools will be able to handle the situation without revealing their names. Most schools will also have told their students about the way to handle this situation.

Parents should send questions and comments to dearteacher@dearteacher.com, and visit the dearteacher.com website to learn more about helping their children succeed in school.

On any given weekend, my husband and teenage son spend hours watching sports together. It might be football, hockey or golf. You name it, they watch it. They cheer, clap, and endlessly discuss things like trades, uniforms, and salaries.

If I’m honest, I’m a bit jealous. While I like sports, I’m not as enthusiastic about the topic as they are. And seeing them bond over sports makes me feel like such moments are harder to come by for me and my teenage son. It’s not like when he was little and we hunted for worms in the backyard or he sat on my lap while I read him a book.

When I stop to think about it, though, I realize I’m mistaken. That’s because there are dozens of moments each day when my son and I share an activity, hang out, or exist comfortably in the same room. Just yesterday we went on a bike ride, talked about a new recipe, and played with our cats.

These moments prove that I have no reason to mourn the loss of time to connect with my son. Neither should you, Moms! There are so many events, both big and small, over which we can bond with our young men. Here are 50 activities to inspire the next bonding moment with your teenage son:

1. Cook together.

2. Take a walk around the neighborhood.

3. Stay up late when he stays up.

4. Get ice cream.

5. Go jogging or run a 5k.

6. Play backyard games like ladder ball or corn hole.

7. Take him bowling.

8. Text him. Send him funny memes, motivational quotes, or anything that will make him smile.

9. Play golf or mini golf.

10. Find a genre of movies or shows you both like to stream.

11. Or go to the movies or live theater.

12. Attend a local sporting event.

13. Run errands. It sounds weird, but my son will often come with me to chat and ask me to swing through the drive thru for a snack.

50 Fantastic Bonding Activities for Moms and Their Teenage Sons

TWEENS & TEENS

— by Katy M. Clark

14. Go to a concert.

15. Hit the hiking trails.

16. Play video games

17. Laugh at his jokes. Yes, even the ones about bodily functions!

18. Take a class together.

19. Bond over your pets. Walk the dog or feed the guinea pig.

20. Go on a day trip.

21. Or take a longer weekend trip.

22. Spend time teaching him some thing he needs to know. Does he know how to do his laundry or make a bed with hospital corners?

23. Listen to the same podcast.

24. Attend a boat, car, or home improvement show.

25. Take him out to lunch or dinner. Just the two of you.

26. Go fishing.

27. Spend the afternoon boating or sailing.

28. Watch a sunset together.

29. Head to the zoo or aquarium.

30. Show up for his meets, games, concerts, and other activities. Tell him how much you love watching him.

31. Ride horses.

32. Ride bikes.

33. Share an inside joke. Tell it for years to come.

34. Make crafts.

35. Plant and tend a garden.

36. Spend a relaxing day at the beach.

37. Buy his favorite snacks (in large quantities!) and enjoy watching him eat them.

38. Build or fix something together.

39. Play cards or board games.

40. Do a jigsaw puzzle.

41. Join the same gym and work out together.

42. Play paintball or laser tag.

43. Volunteer together. There are tons of causes in which you can serve alongside each other, such as food pantries or animal shelters.

44. Play tennis or pickleball.

45. Hug him—and celebrate if he hugs you back!

46. Embrace boredom and do nothing. You’ll be surprised how much you simply treasure being in the same room with him.

47. Read the same book and talk about it.

48. Tell him you love him. Every day.

49. Cherish every time he says, “Love you, too.”

50. Watch football, basketball, hockey or any other sport he loves. Even if you don’t know the players’ names, salaries, or statistics. Just be with him.

This list shows that just about anything we do with our teenage sons can turn into a time of connection, whether it lasts just a few minutes or a lot longer. Keep your eyes and hearts open, Mamas. Here’s to bonding with our big boys!

Katy M. Clark is a writer and mom of two who embraces her imperfections on her blog Experienced Bad Mom.

DIGITAL KIDS

● Information Security

● Information Technology Management

Certification is another route to consider. The EC-Council, a leader in ethical hacking education, offers various certifications. The Certified Ethical Hacker (CEH) is an excellent starting point, while the Licensed Penetration Tester (LPT) certification represents the pinnacle of expertise in the field. These certifications are highly valued by employers and can significantly enhance a candidate's credentials.

DEVELOPING

RESPONSIBLE DIGITAL CITIZENS

While fostering your child's interest in hacking, it’s essential to emphasize ethical behavior and respect for privacy. Encourage them to use their skills to improve security rather than exploit weaknesses. Joining communities like Hack-

erOne or Bugcrowd can provide a platform for responsible hacking. These platforms allow hackers to report security flaws to companies legally and ethically, sometimes even offering financial rewards for significant discoveries.

PARENTAL

INVOLVEMENT AND COMMUNICATION

Maintaining open communication about your child's activities and interests is vital. Show genuine interest in their projects and learning experiences. Setting clear boundaries and discussing the legal and ethical implications of hacking can help guide them toward making responsible decisions. Engaging in joint learning activities or even taking intro-

ductory cybersecurity courses together can strengthen your understanding and relationship.

With these strategies, you can support your child's passion for technology while steering them towards ethical and rewarding endeavors in the field of cybersecurity.

CONCLUSION

As the Director of Technology for a public school district, I frequently counsel parents of tech-inclined students who struggle to make responsible choices. These children possess a passion for the digital world and the potential to excel. With the right guidance and resources, parents can help channel their children’s skills into positive, impactful careers. Ethical hacking, in particular, offers a pathway to become the cybersecurity experts our increasingly digital world desperately needs. Use the insights from this article to nurture the next generation of cybersecurity professionals from today's aspiring hackers.

Mike Daugherty is a husband, father of three young children, author, speaker, Google Innovator, and possible Starbucks addict. He is a certified educational technology leader who has served in a variety of roles through his twenty-year career in public education. Currently, Mike is the Director of Technology for the Chagrin Falls Exempted Village School district in Northeast Ohio. As an IT director he has developed creative, well thought out solutions that positively impact teaching and learning.

As a divorced mom, I share custody with my kids’ dad which means the entire month of July (minus a handful of weekends and nights), they are with him. This will be my fifth summer of not having them for a month out of the year, and while it still feels incredibly strange…I have learned how to make the most of this time for my own healing. The month of July has become my “reset month.” I have noticed how the work I have done on myself is helping others in their current marital struggles when it feels like things will never get better. Let me help you make your month of July a healing and helpful one rather than just another time of the year you may be dreading.

Since coining July as my “reset month,” I have learned to become super protective of that time. I schedule things with friends very intentionally, while making sure to leave enough time for myself to be introverted. This helps me preserve energy for the hard days when I miss my kids, or something triggers a memory that has me feeling like I’ve taken 10 steps back.

As a marriage and family therapist, I continually tell my clients to be mindful of the energy they have and where they’re spending it. A great way to take

SINGLE PARENTING

— by Meagan Ruffing

Using July as Your Month

inventory of this is to write down things that both fill you up and drain you. My list looks something like this:

• Going for a walk or run

• Listening to a podcast

• Snuggling my dogs

Things That Give Me Energy

• Spending time with friends who speak wisdom into me

• Cleaning my house

• Volunteering

• Doing something nice for someone

• Baking treats for friends and family

• Yoga

• Massage

• Reading

• Calling my family

• Getting a pedicure

• Journaling

• Lighting a candle

• Taking a bath

Things That Drain My Energy

• Spending too much time on social media

• Not taking breaks throughout the day to sit down

• Not taking time to eat when I’m hungry

• Not drinking enough water

• Gossiping

• Drinking alcohol

• Running too many errands in one day

• Isolating myself

• Not getting enough sleep

continued on page 50

• Worrying about things I can’t control

• Eating too much sugar

I am constantly updating my lists to help with self-awareness. Being proactive about my mental health has helped me be productive on the days where I am feeling amazing and mindful of my feelings on the days when I’m sad. If you don’t have something like this written down yet, I encourage you to put this into practice. I’ve started to keep this list in the notes section on my phone to help with time.

Since July is smack-dab in the middle of the year, this is a perfect time to take inventory of where you’re at with things and to think about how you want your life to be. If you’re not where you want to be yet, that’s okay. Consider making a vision board or talking to a mental health therapist to help you sort through things.

This July, I plan on sitting by the pool, writing letters to friends in other states, flying home to Boston, and enjoying the life I have created for me and my kids. I will also make sure I am as present as possible (less social media, distractions, etc.) when I get my kids for the few days I do, during this month. I want every day in July, to be set with in tention and to continue to be my “reset” so that I can enjoy the rest of my year as a healthy and happy mom, daughter, friend, and neighbor.

What will your July look like?

I am constantly updating my lists to help with selfawareness.

Celebrate these FUN DAYS during the month of

Meagan Ruffing is a parenting journalist, mental health therapist, and sin gle mom who tries to do her best each day. She doesn’t always get things right but continually strives to do better.

July 4th Independence Day

July 7th Father Daughter Take a Walk Day

July 21st Ice Cream Day

July 25th Carousel/ Merry-Go-Round Day

July 13th French Fries Day

July 28th Waterpark Day

Anxiety disorders cause extreme fear and worry, and changes in a child's behavior, sleep, eating, or mood.

WHAT ARE THE KINDS OF ANXIETY DISORDERS?

Different anxiety disorders can affect kids and teens. They include:

• generalized anxiety disorder

• separation anxiety disorder

• social anxiety disorder

• panic disorder

• selective mutism

• specific phobias

Generalized anxiety disorder (GAD). GAD causes kids to worry almost every day — and over lots of things. Kids with GAD worry over things that most kids worry about, like homework, tests, or making mistakes.

But with GAD, kids worry more, and more often, about these things. Kids with GAD also worry over things parents might not expect would cause worry. For example, they might worry about recess, lunchtime, birthday parties, playtime with friends, or riding the school bus. Kids with GAD may also wor-

Specia l N eeds Insp ire

What Are Anxiety Disorders?

ry about war, weather, or the future. Or about loved ones, safety, illness, or getting hurt.

Having GAD can make it hard for kids to focus in school. Because with GAD, there is almost always a worry on a kid's mind. GAD makes it hard for kids to relax and have fun, eat well, or fall asleep at night. They may miss many days of school because worry makes them feel sick, afraid, or tired.

Some kids with GAD keep worries to themselves. Others talk about their worries with a parent or teacher. They might ask over and over whether something they worry about will happen. But it’s hard for them to feel OK, no matter what a parent says.

Separation anxiety disorder (SAD). It's normal for babies and very young kids to feel anxious the first times they are apart from their parent. But soon they get used to being with a grandparent, babysitter, or teacher. And they start to feel at home at daycare or school.

But when kids don't outgrow the fear of being apart from a parent, it’s called separation anxiety disorder. Even as they get older, kids with SAD feel very anxious about being away from their parent or away from home. They may miss many days of school. They may say they feel too sick or upset to go. They may cling to a parent, cry, or refuse to go to school, sleepovers, playdates, or other activities without their parent. At home, they may have trouble falling asleep or sleeping alone. They may avoid being in a room at home if their parent isn’t close by.

Social phobia (social anxiety disorder). With social phobia, kids feel too afraid of what others will think or say. They are always afraid they might do or say something emcontinued on page 52

barrassing. They worry they might sound or look weird. They don’t like to be the center of attention. They don’t want others to notice them, so they might avoid raising their hand in class. If they get called on in class, they may freeze or panic and can't answer. With social phobia, a class presentation or a group activity with classmates can cause extreme fear.

A parent or teacher may see signs that a child or teen is anxious. For example, a kid might cling, miss school, or cry. They might act scared or upset, or refuse to talk or do things.

Social phobia can cause kids and teens to avoid school or friends. They may feel sick or tired before or during school. They may complain of other body sensations that go with anxiety too. For example, they may feel their heart racing or feel short of breath. They may feel jumpy and feel they can’t sit still. They may feel their face get hot or blush. They may feel shaky or lightheaded.

Panic disorder. These sudden anxiety attacks can cause overwhelming physicals symptoms, such as feeling shaky or jittery, trembling, a racing heart rate, and shortness of breath. Panic attacks can happen any time. They’re more common in teens than kids.

Selective mutism. This extreme form of social phobia causes kids to be so afraid they don't talk. Kids and teens who have it can talk. And they do talk at home or with their closest people. But they refuse to talk at all at school, with friends, or in other places where they have this fear.

Specific phobias. It’s normal for young kids to feel scared of the dark, monsters, big animals, or loud noises like thunder or fireworks. Most of the time, when kids feel afraid, adults can help them feel safe and calm again. But a phobia is a more intense, more extreme, and longer lasting fear of a specific thing. With a phobia, a child dreads the thing they fear and tries to avoid it. If they are near what they fear, they feel terrified and are hard to comfort.

With a specific phobia, kids may have an extreme fear of things like animals, spiders, needles or shots, blood, throwing up, thunderstorms, people in costumes, or the dark. A phobia causes kids to avoid going places where they think they might see the thing they fear. For example, a kid with a phobia of dogs may not go to a friend’s house, to a park, or to a party because dogs might be there.

WHAT ARE THE SIGNS & SYMPTOMS OF ANXIETY?

A parent or teacher may see signs that a child or teen is anxious. For example, a kid might cling, miss school, or cry. They might act scared or upset, or refuse to talk or do things. Kids and teens with anxiety also feel symptoms that others can’t see. It can make them feel afraid, worried, or nervous.

It can affect their body too. They might feel shaky, jittery, or short of breath. They may feel “butterflies” in their stomach, a hot face, clammy hands, dry mouth, or a racing heart.

These symptoms of anxiety are the result of the “fight or flight” response. This is the body’s normal response to danger. It triggers the release of natural chemicals in the body. These chemicals prepare us to deal with a real danger. They affect heart rate, breathing, muscles, nerves, and digestion. This response is meant to protect us from danger. But with anxiety disorders, the “fight or flight” response is overactive. It happens even when there is no real danger.

WHAT CAUSES ANXIETY DISORDERS?

Several things play a role in causing the overactive “fight or flight” that happens with anxiety disorders. They include:

Genetics. A child who has a family member with an anxiety disorder is more likely to have one too. Kids may inherit genes that make them prone to anxiety.

Brain chemistry. Genes help direct the way brain chemicals (called neurotransmitters) work. If specific brain chemicals are in short supply, or not working well, it can cause anxiety.

Life situations. Things that happen in a child’s life can be stressful and difficult to cope with. Loss, serious illness, death of a loved one, violence, or abuse can lead some kids to become anxious.

Learned behaviors. Growing up in a family where others are fearful or anxious also can “teach” a child to be afraid too.

HOW ARE ANXIETY DISORDERS DIAGNOSED?

Anxiety disorders can be diagnosed by a trained therapist. They talk with you and your child, ask questions, and listen carefully. They’ll ask how and when the child’s anxiety and

fears happen most. That helps them diagnose the specific anxiety disorder the child has.

A child or teen with symptoms of anxiety should also have a regular health checkup. This helps make sure no other health problem is causing the symptoms.

HOW ARE ANXIETY DISORDERS TREATED?

Most often, anxiety disorders are treated with cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT). This is a type of talk therapy that helps families, kids, and teens learn to manage worry, fear, and anxiety.

CBT teaches kids that what they think and do affects how they feel. In CBT, kids learn that when they avoid what they fear, the fear stays strong. They learn that when they face a fear, the fear gets weak and goes away.

In CBT:

• Parents learn how to best respond when a child is anxious. They learn how to help kids face fears.

• Kids learn coping skills so they can face fear and worry less.

The therapist helps kids practice, and gives support and praise as they try. Over time, kids learn to face fears and feel better. They learn to get used to situations they’re afraid of. They feel proud of what they’ve learned. And without so many worries, they can focus on other things — like school, activities, and fun. Sometimes, medicines are also used to help treat anxiety.

HOW CAN I HELP MY CHILD?

If your child has an anxiety disorder, here are some ways you can help:

• Find a trained therapist and take your child to all the therapy appointments.

• Talk often with the therapist, and ask how you can best help your child.

• Help your child face fears. Ask the therapist how you can help your child practice at home. Praise your child for efforts to cope with fears and worry.

• Help kids talk about feelings. Listen, and let them know you understand, love, and accept them. A caring relationship with you helps your child build inner strengths.

• Encourage your child to take small steps forward. Don’t let your child give up or avoid what they’re afraid of. Help them take small positive steps forward.

• Be patient. It takes a while for therapy to work and for kids to feel better.

Information provided by KidsHealth.org from Nemours Children’s Health. © 1995-2021. The Nemours Foundation/ KidsHealth®. Reprinted following guidelines.

We take a look at topics important to parents of children with special needs in each and every issue of WNY Family Magazine with our monthly column.

Specia l N eeds Insp ire Th

Advocate

Growth Abilit y Strategies Empower

Does your business, agency or organization serve children with special needs in our community?

Their parents are looking for your services all year long. Advertise in conjunction with this informative column and let our readership of nearly 55,000 WNY parents know about your important programs and services each and every month.

For more information, call Paul Kline at 716-836-3486

Create a Family-Friendly Grazing Board

(Family Features) A beautifully designed charcuterie board may feel more like a grown-up treat, but with the right ingredients, delicious grazing boards can provide fun and nutrition for the whole family.

No matter what you call it, charcuterie boards, grazing boards and snack platters are all basically the same thing. The boards make a trendy addition to an entertaining menu, but a platter or kidfriendly board can be equally pleasing. What you serve on a grazing board is entirely up to you. Most include a selection of meats and cheeses, and many incorporate nuts, crackers, dips and jams. Some also incorporate fresh fruits and vegetables. Creating your own board means there really are no rules; you can add just about anything you want.

To build a successful board, keep these tips in mind:

Choose ingredients and elements that don’t require temperature control. The idea of a grazing board is that it sits out for a while. Avoid anything that needs refrigeration, heat or will lose its shape or flavor if it rests for an extended amount of time.

Select a surface large enough to hold a variety of food. It can be a simple cutting board or a cute platter. There’s no specific size requirement but err on the side of bigger; spacing out your goodies can be more attractive and less messy.

veggies to your cart can help make a difference in your community.

Build your board around a theme to add an extra element of fun. Use mini cookie cutters to make fun, kid-friendly shapes out of cheese and meats. Be mindful of colors; a rainbow platter is vibrant and appealing, and colorful fruits and veggies offer a strong mix of nutrients.

Remember it doesn’t have to be elaborate. Classic favorites are all you need. Even kid favorites like sections of mandarin oranges, carrot sticks and chocolate chips are fair game for a family-friendly board.

Find more ideas for creating family-friendly treats at healthyfamilyproject.com.

Hard and soft taco shells

Ground turkey, seasoned and browned

Lettuce

Diced tomatoes

Shredded cheese

Chopped onions

Chopped peppers

Sour cream

Cilantro

Lime wedges

On grazing board or platter, arrange guacamole, salsa, queso, taco shells, ground turkey, lettuce, tomatoes, shredded cheese, onions, peppers, sour cream, cilantro and lime wedges.

Taco Tuesday Board

Weekend Breakfast Grazing Board

Recipe courtesy of Healthy Family Project’s “Come Graze With Us” ecookbook.

Hard-boiled eggs

Cooked sausage links

Mini frozen waffles, toasted

Mini frozen pancakes, toasted

Mini muffins

Yogurt

Fresh fruit

Use high-quality ingredients to ensure every bite is delicious and nutritious. While shopping, remember to look for the Produce for Kids and Healthy Family Project logos next to favorite items in the produce department, as adding these flavorful fruits and

Recipe courtesy of Healthy Family Project’s “Come Graze With Us” ecookbook.

Guacamole

Salsa

Queso

Syrup

Jelly

On grazing board or platter, arrange eggs, sausage links, toasted waffles, toasted pancakes, muffins, yogurt, fruit, syrup and jelly.

THE KIDDIE GOUR ME T

Brothers stars as an upscale food focused restaurant with a down-to-earth feel in decor. Brothers' owners Romone Anderson and Ronnie DuBose have moved from take out to sit down, serving a variety of cuisines, while excelling at breakfast and soul food.

The $8.00 Kids' menu is served with fries. A few kids were eating items that included Two Mini Hamburgers, Chicken Fingers, Grilled Cheese, and Hot Dog. Drinks are separate ($2.95), as are desserts.

— by Barbara Blackburn

Brothers Restaurant and Bar

475 Ellicott Street Buffalo, NY 14203

716-322-0084

716brothers.com

~ SPOONS ~ FOOD 4/5

SERVICE 5/5

sounds exciting: Jerk Rolls, Soul Rolls, and Chicken Fingers.

Dad was especially pleased with his entree, the Pan Seared Salmon ($23.95). The salmon wore a coat of lemon pepper instead of the other choice of Cajun style. The Cornbread which we both enjoyed was good to the last sweet crumb.

FAMILY FRIENDLY 4.5/5

The Fried Lobster, with accompanying assorted sides called to me ($24.95). Crispy batter covered chunks (like fritters) that were a lot more manageable than the shell covered lobster. To accompany my magnificent morsels, I chose Mac & Cheese and Collard Greens. The sides, ordered separately, are $4.95 small and $6.95 large. Most of these appear as sides on restaurant soul food menus.

Dad wisely chose his sides to complement mine: Butter Beans with Rice and Sweet Potatoes. We expected the Sweet Potatoes to be likable, as they were, but the Butter Beans were more so—lovable.

Not to be ignored is the Brothers Over The Top Fried Chicken ($16.50). The hand battered bird in a sandwich is topped with lettuce, tomato, white Cheddar cheese, honey garlic, Siracha Aioli, and pickles. Don't worry about a shortage of siracha peppers; another hot sauce would most likely harmonize well.

Along with these entrees, the Signature Dishes dole out comfort to the palate and the soul. Order Shrimp and Grits with a Twist ($16.95) and you'll delve into deep fried polenta topped with peppers, onion and chicken sausage. The Hertel App Platter ($16.00) certainly

Desserts numbered four: Banana Pudding, Cheesecake Slice, Pound Cake Slice, and Hennessey Pound Cake Slice. There was a lot of yum in the whiskey slice for $5.50 — pound cake at its best.

Some other notable Brothers style entrees not often found on menus are Oxtails and Smothered Turkey Wings. Naturally, you find Waffles and Chicken with Maple Bacon Butter, and three pasta dishes, one of which is Cajun Jambalaya Pasta ($19.95). Should you be watching your weight, three salads may help you do it, if you go easy on the dressings: Chop, Cobb, and Caesar.

The breakfast menu may lure us for a return trip. The 1281 Haddock Breakfast ($19.00) would be my choice. That's two eggs, grits, and potatoes. Yes, there is a Kids' $7.00 special of one egg, meat, and a choice of pancake or French toast.

Brothers serves food that is presented well and leaves good memories. I say that it is soul food with a finishing school flair.

Barb has been happily doing the Kiddie Gourmet for over 35 years. She has two aging children and four grandchildren, all living in Florida. She is a home instructor and community education cooking instructor for Williamsville Central Schools. She is the 2023 recipient of the Buffalo State Alumni Association Senior Service Award.

Whether at home or in the car on a road trip, Would You Rather? questions can strike up some fun conversations .

Here are some QUESTIONS you can ask your child!

Would you rather eat donuts or candy every day?

Would you rather create a famous piece of art or invent a famous invention?

Would you rather travel by bus or by bicycle?

Would you rather be a superhero or an astronaut?

Would you rather be a doctor for people or a veterinarian?