Women's Edition Colorado Springs – February 2020

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February 2020

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Editor’s Notes

Valentine’s Day…Not Always Hearts and Flowers As I am writing this, I am overjoyed by the love

that surrounds me. I’ve been wanting to rearrange my office for some time now, but the timing was never right. When I walked into my office on Monday, it was perfect! Shannon and her daughters, Kiera and Audrey, had spent the weekend moving heavy furniture around, just to show me that they love me. Another display of love was brought to my attention when I learned that one of our crew here at Women’s Edition has a son who is recovering from kidney surgery. He donated his kidney to his mother-in-law. The Greeks would call this “agape,” which means a love that is selfless and charitable. In an article in Sojourners, Roman Krznaric states that there is growing evidence that agape is in a dangerous decline. Empathy levels in the United States have declined sharply over the past 40 years, with the steepest fall occurring in the past decade. We urgently need to revive our capacity to care about strangers! We can do something about that by starting to see the needs in our society and acting on them. A great example of agape in action is Big Brothers/Big Sisters. This organization connects kids who need a good role model in their lives with adults who are dedicated to being there for them. My son, Adam, and my daughter-in-law, Sally, are involved with this organization in Boise. This year, Adam was named Big Brother of the Year in the Southwest Idaho chapter. I’m proud of them because of their selflessness...their agape. There are many different kinds of love. The Greeks have at least six different names for it. The one that comes to my mind first on Valentine’s Day is “eros,” of course—romantic, passionate, intimate love. The Greeks felt that this kind of love showed a loss of control, and that idea is still reflected in our language. We “fall” in love. We are “crazy” about someone. We may expect that special someone to fulfill us somehow, wherever we think we are lacking. This can be dangerous! It’s important to love ourselves. If we grew up in an average home, we were told “no” or what we could not do more than 148,000 times in our first 18 years of life. Your brain believes what you tell it. Let’s tell our brains that we are capable, valuable people who can make this a better place to live. This month, we celebrate Kurt’s birthday and, possibly, the arrival of his second son, Kaeden, (my second grandson). He may be a leap year baby! Babies have their own timelines, so we will see. My prayer is that he will be healthy, no matter when he decides to get here. We will try our best not to fill his head with 148,000 “nos” in his early life. We’ll let him and his brother, Mason, know that they are loved and that they can do anything they set their minds to. I love you all. I think you know which kind.

Points of Interest Griggs Vacuums is passionate about helping you have a healthier and cleaner home! If your vacuum cleaner needs a tune-up (or you need a new one altogether), give them a call. Find their ad on page 8. It’s not too late to get your teeth ready for the new decade. Lifetime Dental is here to help. From Invisalign to dental implants, they’ve got you covered. No dental insurance? No problem—they offer an alternative! Check out their ad on page 11. If you think you may have a hormone imbalance, College Pharmacy has a solution. Flip back to page 1. Their experienced pharmacists will answer your questions and help you find relief. Realtor Molly McCollum wants you to have a stress-free real estate transaction. If you’re preparing to buy or sell a home, turn to page 7 to get started. What if you could help one of the hundreds of kids in the Pikes Peak region who have been placed in foster care? You can! CASA is looking for volunteers to give these kids a voice and change their story. See page 1 for their contact information. Facing divorce and custody issues is not easy or enjoyable, but it may be the reality. Shannon Law can provide thoughtful and helpful legal representation. Turn to page 1 and get your free consultation scheduled.

Anita Howarth, Editor On the Cover: SlimSation by Multiples More information at www.slimsation.com

Positive Thought of the Month “All friendly feelings for others are an extension of a man’s feelings for himself.” —Aristotle

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Focus on Finance

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Investment Fees How Much Do You Pay, and Why?

By George Morgan

Fees play a critical role in the investment return that individual investors receive from their mutual funds and 401(k) plans. Every dollar that an investor pays to a broker reduces that return. Fortunately, by choosing funds thoughtfully, investors can exert some control over how much of their investment return is whittled away by fees for financial advice and money management. Wall Street has always had high expectations about the compensation they receive for their supposed investment expertise. From the 1960s through the 1990s, it was common to find mutual funds that charged an 8.5 percent commission up front and a 1.25 percent annual maintenance fee. This meant that, during the first two years of your portfolio, you had to have an investment return of almost 10 percent just to break even. In today’s highly competitive environment, we are experiencing downward pressure on fees, with some firms’ fees approaching zero percent while others are fighting to keep all they can. There are two basic types of mutual funds: actively managed funds and passively managed index funds. Actively managed funds seek to improve performance by buying and selling stocks on a regular basis. This requires portfolio managers, who are handsomely compensated for their efforts. Trading activity also comes with a cost in and of itself. All these costs are paid by the investors. Passively managed index funds, on the other hand, simply buy and hold the stocks in an index, in the same proportions as the index that they are seeking to replicate. Once the stocks are placed in the portfolio, they produce no trading expenses and require no further care from a portfolio manager. This translates into nearly no fees for the investors to pay. Investors who buy actively managed mutual funds with high fees must ask themselves the question: Are the costs worth it? According to a recent article in the Wall Street Journal, the answer is no. The benchmark that the article used to define a high-priced fund was one with a maintenance fee in excess of 1.5 percent. I find this to be ridiculously high. Most of the actively managed funds that I see in 401(k) plans are around 0.85 percent. Over the past 10 years, the article stated, the average high-fee fund had an average return of 10.61 percent, while the lower-fee funds averaged 12.26 percent returns. Thus, the low-fee funds averaged an investment return 1.65 percent higher than their more expensive cousins. I’ll allow that 1.65 percent may not sound like a significant number. However, if you compound this out over the course of 10 to 20 years, the difference can be huge. What I find quite curious about the Wall Street Journal article is that it left out the most cost-efficient of all mutual funds. The index funds the article surveyed were in the 0.85 percent fee range, but

there exist index funds with maintenance fees in the 0.02 percent range. The article did correctly point out that, because of their lower fees, index funds produce higher investment returns, on average, than actively managed funds. Index funds, on average, have outperformed the best actively managed funds discussed in the article by 0.80 percent. A recent online survey by the RAND Corporation discovered that investors are overwhelming uninformed about the fees charged by their mutual funds. The survey found that the typical investor spends 46 seconds reading about fees and 22 seconds reading about conflicts of interest. The study went on to find that, among households who own mutual funds, 22 percent said that fees were either not very important or not at all important. A further 26 percent didn’t know what fees they were paying, and 20 percent insisted they paid no fees at all, which is impossible. The moral of the story is that investors are not doing their homework. As a result, they are paying big bucks and getting nothing in return, while brokers are receiving big bucks for services they don’t deliver. While investors carry some of the burden for a lack of awareness of the amount and type of fees they are paying, the financial services industry shares some responsibility. Recently, the Securities and Exchange Commission (SEC) issued a ruling that brokers must provide their clients with disclosures that are written in plain English and limited to four pages. It’s hard to blame investors for not knowing how much they are paying in fees when the answer lies somewhere within a 50-page document written by a group of lawyers. The bottom line is something I have been preaching for years: When it comes to investment return, fees matter! Don’t waste your money by staying in the dark. Find out what fees you’re paying and why. Only when you have that information can you make a real choice about your investments. Editor’s Note: Professor Morgan has over 40 years’ experience in the investment field, both as a university professor and as a financial advisor. He currently serves on the faculty at the University of Nebraska at Omaha, where he directs a program designed to educate 401(k) plan participants on how to improve their investment strategy. The opinions voiced in this material are for general information only and are not intended to provide specific advice or recommendations for any individual. To determine which investments may be appropriate for you, consult your financial advisor prior to investing. WE

February 2020

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Inside This Edition 2

Editor’s Notes

25

Cuddly Critters

3

Focus On Finance

26

Good Looks

6

Fashion Worthy

28

Healthy Living

9

Zodiac Forecast

30

The Market Place

32

Income Outcome

33

Kids Comments

34

View From The Top

36

To Your Good Health

Happy birthday, Aquarius! Take a breath and anticipate a very cheerful month. You now have the sovereignty to create the life you have been seeking.

10

Weekend Gourmet

12

Business Style

14

A Woman’s Work

16

Fresh Concept Aging can’t be avoided, but replacement hormones may help you avoid some of aging’s irritating symptoms.

18

Interiors By Design

24

Season of Life

Not everybody loves going to the dentist. Luckily, professionals in the field of pediatric dentistry are working to make children’s early experiences at the dentist fun and relaxing.

38

Home Works

40

Positive Perspective

16

Over the last number of years, I have been reflecting on my lack of patience, and I have been working on developing this virtue.

25 Owner, Editor Anita Howarth

Operations Manager Shannon Majors

Art & Editorial Director Erin Lanza

Copy Editor Liz Huett

Women’s Edition 5555 Er i ndal e D r i ve, Suite 201 • Colorad o S p rin gs, CO 80918 • (719) 227-02 6 2 National Publisher: Women’s Edition, Inc. 888-892-4076 Women’s Edition is operated locally by M. Renee Publishing, Inc., an independently owned and operated franchisee. Women’s Edition® The Magazine For Metropolitan Women is a registered trademark of Women’s Edition, Inc. (Reg. No. 2,501,858). All rights reserved. Women’s Edition has no affiliation with any other publication. Women’s Edition makes every effort to provide accurate information in advertising and editorial content, however, does not make any claim as to the accuracy of information provided by advertisers or editorial contributors and accepts no responsibility or liability for inaccurate information. Women’s Edition is not responsible for the accuracy of the QR codes appearing in our magazine. © Copyright 2020, Women’s Edition, Inc. All rights reserved. This material is for personal use only. Republication and redissemination in whole or in part is expressly prohibited without the prior written consent of Women’s Edition, Inc.

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February 2020

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Fashion Worthy

Off the Runway What’s New for Spring By Holly Bell

What is the purpose of fashion shows? It’s a fair question. The clothing shown is usually a little outrageous (along with the prices), and the clothing is often modeled by people who are not representative of most of the population. Fashion shows originated in the 1930s as a way for designers around the world to communicate their latest ideas to one another and to the public. Every six months, designers offer their ideas on new trends for the upcoming season. Fashionistas historically would follow the latest trends religiously. Things have changed dramatically since the days when designers and fashion shows set the rules. Most of us no longer care if hems go up or down, or if jeans are flared or skinny. We wear what we like and what looks good on us. We want clothes to be comfortable and easy to clean. We want to wear what flatters us, not necessarily what is the hot trend. We are more concerned about the environmental impact of our belongings. We want to wear clothing that will last a few seasons or more, not just one. Fashion shows are still tremendously useful, though, as ready-to-wear designers take elements shown in high fashion and transfer them to be usable for the everyday woman. It is up to us if we want to try working a new trendy item into our wardrobe. I still love fashion shows, even if only for the entertainment factor. Let’s take a look at some of the spring trends that have made it off the runway and will be easy to incorporate into our closets. Every season, the Pantone Color Institute forecasts the colors that will be used in fashion and home furnishings during the upcoming season. It’s always fun to look forward to what we will be seeing in the stores as the weather warms. Leatrice Eiseman, the executive director for the Pantone Color Institute, notes that the palette for spring and summer 2020 “infuses heritage and tradition with a colorful, youthful update that creates strong multi-colored combinations as well as energizing and optimistic pairings.” They have chosen four prominent colors for the upcoming seasons. The Institute forecasts Flame Scarlet as the top color this spring. It will be a bright orange-red that exudes confidence and determination. Yellow tones have been making a comeback in fashion, and we can look forward to seeing Saffron as a prominent color choice. It is a medium-toned mustard that can be worn year-round and is flattering to many complexions. Classic Blue is a favorite of many because it reminds us of the beauty of the evening sky. Last of the top four is Biscay Green. It is an aqua shade that is cooling and refreshing. Not mentioned by the Pantone Color Institute but noted by many designers are highlighterinspired neon brights. These will add vibrance and personality to many items in the coming spring and summer. Spring looks will feature some familiar classics with a little twist. With a nod to the 1970s, we will see maxi-length dresses and skirts in vintage patterns. There is nothing like an ankle-length skirt for a little elegance and comfort…with the bonus of not

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having to worry about how your legs look! With a grunge upgrade, long dresses are shown with chunky boots. Retro looks ruled the runway, with crochet and knits done in new and original ways. Suits are still trendy, with the variable of being either matched pieces or having a contrasting jacket and pant. A new look offered in suiting is the vest. Very flattering, vests offer a tailored element to your wardrobe. The newest edgy suit trend is the Bermuda short suit. Very modern, cool, and flattering, the Bermuda short suit looks smashing in plaids that are going forward from fall. Everyone’s favorite polka dots are still on trend from last summer, with the newest being very large dots. These offer a fun and upbeat look. Another classic with a twist will be the white shirt. Designers have re-invented the white shirt with cropping, mixing it with patterns and embellishments. That sounds like a useful trend to add to your wardrobe! As in seasons past, clothing designers are still fascinated with the sleeve. This spring, we’ll see lots of puffy, oversized sleeves in all lengths. Topping it all off are gold chain necklaces. A bit bolder than in the past, these gold chains can be worn with anything, layered or solo, for a finished look. Even though it’s still gray and cold outside, spring colors and fresh trends are bringing a ray of sunshine to stores. It’s fun to browse while we’re waiting for the crocuses and tulips to pop up. Enjoy some color this spring! Editor’s Note: Holly has been in the fashion industry for over 30 years as a buyer, boutique store owner, visual merchandiser, and fashion show producer. She is currently the owner of a modeling agency. Holly regularly appears on local TV doing fashion segments. WE

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Zodiac Forecast

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AQUARIUS

January 20–February 18

Happy birthday, Aquarius! Take a breath and anticipate a very cheerful month. You now have the sovereignty to create the life you have been seeking. Any ghosts that were haunting you have been cleaned out, and you can now approach your ambitions without restrictions. Remember to be grateful to those who have helped you on your way to this new destination. Pisces (Feb 19–Mar 20) There is much optimism and positivity in the House of Family, and harmony prevails! Remember to care for yourself and to allocate time for relaxation and rejuvenation. Aries (Mar 21–Apr 19) Hope and optimism will be the foundation for your month. You will experience splendid growth and accomplishments. There will also be positive aspects of Venus furthering your romantic life! Taurus (Apr 20–May 20) If travel is your desire, then this month is for you! The planets are aligned for achieving goals. Your determination will help you conquer obstacles. Gemini (May 21–Jun 20) This is a promising time for your career! Focus on important projects that mean the most to you. Avoid trying too many things at once and becoming overwhelmed. Cancer (Jun 21–Jul 22) Most of the planets are in the western half of the horoscope, and you feel empowered with positivity and cheer. Spirituality is fueling your actions! Leo (Jul 23–Aug 22) This is the month of romance! For single Leos, love relationships will develop effortlessly. That unique

someone may be found in social gatherings. For existing relationships, love will be quite dynamic! Virgo (Aug 23–Sep 22) Your professional life and domestic affairs are requiring the same amount of attention. Your love affairs will be passionate. Remain balanced and allow things to take their own course. Libra (Sep 23–Oct 22) Planet Venus helps your self-esteem grow. You are finally getting the recognition and credit that you deserve. Your social life is on quite an upswing! Scorpio (Oct 23–Nov 21) Divert excess energy to fitness. It is a good practice to be mindful of your emotional health. Perhaps taking up meditation could relax your body and mind. Sagittarius (Nov 22–Dec 21) The planetary positions are bringing you abundant energy. This push will allow you to create whatever reality your mind and heart desire! Capricorn (Dec 22–Jan 19) If life were a stage, you would be your own director. Use your mental power and self-will to control your actions and obtain real success! WE

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February 2020

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Weekend Gourmet

Super Bowl, Super Hearts! Let’s Eat! Lover’s Cherry Pie

By Kate Beiting

LOVER’S CHERRY PIE

Mix together 1 can of cherry pie filling, 1 can of (drained) water-packed red cherries, 1/3 cup of sugar, 1 teaspoon of lemon juice, and 1/2 teaspoon of almond extract. Cook for 5 minutes. Pour the cherries into a prepared pie crust. Put 2 or 3 dots of butter on top and then put the top crust on. Flute the edges and cut vents for steam. Bake on a cookie sheet at 350 degrees for 40–50 minutes. Serve warm with vanilla ice cream. Spicy Baked Cheese Dip Blend two 8-ounce packages of soft cream cheese with 1 cup of mayonnaise, 1/2 cup of grated pepper jack cheese, and 1 can of diced green chilies. Spread into an ungreased pie plate. Top with 1 cup of shredded Parmesan cheese and 1/2 cup of panko breadcrumbs. Bake at 400 degrees for 25 minutes. Great with veggies, crackers, and toasts. Cabbage Soup Melt 1 stick of butter in a large stockpot. Sauté 1 chopped onion in the melted butter for 10 minutes. Add 1 bay leaf, a small head of cabbage (cored and shredded), and 1/2 teaspoon of caraway seed.

Cook for 5–8 minutes. Add 4 cups of chicken stock and simmer for 10–15 minutes. If you want to add 1 cup of cooked sausage, do it now. Remove the bay leaf and add 2 cups of cream and 2–4 ounces of crumbled blue cheese (or Swiss). Heat through—do not boil. Season to taste. Serve with crusty homemade bread or crackers and croutons. Winter Stew Season and lightly flour 2 pounds of cut-up chuck roast or stew meat. Heat 2 Tablespoons of oil in a stockpot and add the meat. Brown for several minutes, then remove and set aside. Add another Tablespoon of oil and brown 1 cut-up onion. Return the beef to the pan. Add 2 cloves of diced garlic, 3 cups of beef

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stock, 1 cup of water, 1 teaspoon of Worcestershire sauce, and 2 Tablespoons of ketchup. Place the pot in a 325-degree oven for 2–3 hours (you can also use a slow cooker or Instant Pot). Stir several times during cooking time. After 2 hours of cooking time, add 3 cut-up potatoes, 3 cut-up carrots, and 2 stalks of cut-up celery (add a cut-up parsnip or turnip, if desired). Cook for another hour. Taste test and adjust seasonings. Add 1 cup of frozen peas during the last 10 minutes of cooking. Shrimp Sausage with Penne Cook the penne al dente and set aside. In a large skillet, brown 1/2 pound of bulk Italian sausage. Remove and place on a paper towel. Add 1/2 of a minced onion or shallot to the pan, along with 2 cloves of minced garlic. Cook for 1 minute. Add 1 can of chopped tomatoes, 1/3 cup of whipping cream, and a teaspoon of hot Thai chili paste. Add the sausage back to the pan and simmer (do not boil) for 8–10 minutes. Add 8–12 fresh shrimp (peeled and deveined). Cook for 3–5 minutes, until the shrimp turn pink. Add 2 cups of cooked penne pasta and heat through. If needed, thin the sauce with a bit of pasta water. Game Day Party Wings Rub melted butter over a 4-pound bag of chicken wing drummies (wing tips removed). In a bowl, whisk together 2/3 cup of hoisin sauce, 2 Tablespoons of freshly grated orange zest, 1/4 cup of sriracha or hot sauce, 1/4 cup of honey, and 1 teaspoon of toasted sesame oil. Remove 1/2 cup of the marinade and refrigerate it for basting later. Put the butter-coated wings into a large zip-top bag. Pour in the marinade and toss to coat. Refrigerate for at least 2 hours or overnight.

Arrange the wings on a foil-lined, rimmed baking sheet (throw away the used marinade). Bake at 375 degrees for 20 minutes. Brush with half of the reserved marinade. Increase the oven temperature to 425 degrees and bake for 20–25 minutes more. Turn the wings over and brush with the rest of the marinade. Bake for 5–10 more minutes, until done. Serve with bottled dipping sauce or make homemade sauce by mixing 2 teaspoons of sesame oil, 3 minced garlic cloves, 1/2 cup of orange juice, 2 Tablespoons of honey, 2 teaspoons of hoisin sauce, salt and pepper to taste, and 3 diced green onions. Quick Fettucine Alfredo In a large skillet, melt 3 Tablespoons of butter. Add 1 cup of heavy cream. Simmer for 10–15 minutes, until the mixture begins to thicken. Whisk in 1/2 cup of grated Parmesan cheese, 3 slices of fresh garlic, and a dash each of salt, pepper, and nutmeg. Add 8 ounces of cooked fettucine noodles and stir to blend. Valentine Brownies For the brownies: Beat together 2 eggs, 1 stick of soft butter, and 1 cup of sugar. Add 2 squares of melted unsweetened chocolate and 1/2 teaspoon of peppermint extract. Mix in 1/2 cup of flour and stir until blended. Pour the batter into a greased 9x9-inch baking pan. Bake at 350 degrees for 30–35 minutes. Let cool. For the frosting: Mix 2 Tablespoons of soft butter with 1 Tablespoon of milk, 1 cup of powdered sugar, 1 teaspoon of peppermint extract, and 3 drops of red food coloring. Frost the brownies. Mix 1 square of melted unsweetened chocolate with 1 Tablespoon of butter; pour and spread over the frosted brownies. Top with a few crushed peppermints, if desired. WE

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February 2020

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Business Style

Heritage Capital Concepts A Financial and Legacy Planning Firm By Brenda Gracely

It’s no secret that financial planning can seem intimidating— that’s why so many of us put it off for much longer than we should. The experienced and dedicated staff members at Heritage Capital Concepts are here to put you at ease and help you plan for the future. This independent, comprehensive financial planning and insurance firm is located in the heart of Colorado Springs. Their mission is to empower, encourage, and help their clients be secure in the future. Heritage Capital Concepts was founded in 1981 as R. H. Paradis and Associates by the three integral people who influenced the company from the beginning: Rich, Jane, and Steve Paradis. The company was built on the principles of integrity, straight talk, and a handshake. Dedicated to lifelong commitment to their clients, these professionals are proud of the traditions and ethical values that their clients have come to know and rely on for nearly four decades. They remain steadfast partners with their clients, helping them reach their financial and legacy planning goals. The three founding principles were simple and are still enshrined in the day-to-day workings at Heritage Capital Concepts. First, they listen to understand your family’s needs and concerns. Second, they develop plans that are flexible today and sound for tomorrow. Third, they provide your family with a financial and legacy planning team that has a local point of contact. Jenny Paradis joined the company in 2012 as the lead investment advisor representative. “We offer 40 years of experience but with a fresh approach, finding beauty in simplifying what we do,” Jenny explains. “We strive to make financial and legacy planning a simple process for our clients.” The all-female planning team at Heritage Capital Concepts includes Jacqueline Houston and Jenny Paradis*. They implement a 3-D plan of Discovery, Design, and Deployment. Getting to know clients and their families is imperative. “The values, stories, and legacy that you share with your family mean so much,” Jenny points out. “In a close family, what affects one generation, affects everyone. We plan for three generations.” The advisors take their time, sharing their expertise to design a plan that can change and evolve with their clients’ needs over time. Each client’s assets are carefully managed based on the client’s objectives. Heritage Capital Concepts, now in its second generation of leadership, employs best practices within the financial industry, placing an emphasis on comprehensive financial planning, diversification, risk reduction, tax efficiency, and prudent asset management.

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Estate planning services are provided in conjunction with licensed legal advisors. Heritage Capital Concepts is proud of the relationships they have maintained over multiple decades. They have established strategic partnerships with professionals in various industries to create plans that help their clients feel encouraged, empowered, and secure. It is easy to procrastinate financial planning or to feel intimidated by the process itself. Employing a professional who takes the time to understand and prioritize your concerns and needs is time and money well spent. You will feel encouraged because you will have a coach and teacher you trust to help you clarify your plans. At Heritage Capital Concepts, your team of advisors is able to provide a wealth of information. You will be empowered to make wise decisions that will affect you and your family for generations. Your financial plan will be reviewed and updated on a regular basis, taking into consideration any new priorities or significant changes in your assets or family status. When your family’s plan is completed, you will feel secure and comfortable, knowing that you have a plan in place that gives you time to focus on the ones you love. Financial security is a wonderful gift to provide for the future generations of your family. Getting a personalized plan in place can help secure their future and yours. It is also an opportunity to set a great example for younger family members as they begin to contemplate their own financial responsibilities. Call today to get started with your financial and legacy planning. Heritage Capital Concepts can be reached by phone at 719-570-1420. Their office is located at 5555 Erindale Drive, Suite 100, in Colorado Springs. For more information about the services and resources they provide, or to make an appointment to start planning your financial future, please visit them online at heritagecapitalconcepts. com or send a message to info@HeritageCapitalConcepts. com. Financial planning doesn’t have to be as daunting as it sounds! Let the team at Heritage Capital Concepts show you the way. *Registered Representatives offer Securities through The O.N. Equity Sales Company, Member FINRA/SIPC, One Financial Way Cincinnati, Ohio 45242 (513) 794-6794. *Investment Advisory services offered through O.N. Investment Management Company. WE

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February 2020

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A Woman’s Work

A Treasured Love Story Keep That Love Story Alive By Sharon Knierim

Everyone has their own unique love story. Each of us possesses certain treasured personal memories that make our own love stories one-of-a-kind. Long before internet dating services were among the main methods of finding that special someone, matchmaking was a profession in some societies. These matchmakers each had their own method for placing two people or two lists of people who enhanced each other’s finest qualities. For a price, a man and a woman met each other. Typically, their first encounter and sometimes each courting session were scrupulously chaperoned by senior and high-ranking members of the bride’s family. Virtue was at a premium, and a young woman’s honor was highly prized. The presence and serious duties of chaperones and other interested parties was to make sure nothing untoward happened before wedding vows were exchanged in front of an enthusiastic gathering of witnesses. For a great number of young women, marriage was a career. Marriage was what many young women were primarily groomed for as they approached adulthood. Females all over the world were engaged in the study of domestic science and home economics. Of course, times have changed and marriage these days is typically more 50/50. Young females no longer focus only on becoming good wives and mothers. So many career and life choices are possible today while still allowing time for love, marriage, and

children, if women so desire. Even courtship rituals are practically unrecognizable when compared to those in the past. Today, in mainstream life, it is highly uncommon to be a member of an arranged courtship or marriage. Most people seem to be able to find a mate for themselves. Even though .com companies are willing to perform a great deal of the legwork, it is still up to us as humans to make the final decision. There still has to be that special chemistry happening between two people for love to bloom and grow. As we move further into the 21st century, there are fewer and fewer marriages arranged at birth. Although some societies still engage in this practice, it does not offer a guarantee that the married couple will be happy. The natural process of selecting your own love is not a guarantee, either, but finding a soul mate is probably best when left up to the searcher herself. Even if love and life are uncertain, most of us want to create our own love story.

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Another method of finding a husband was a serious endeavor at one time. Women in the British Isles were long ago allowed to ask a gentleman for his hand in marriage. This tradition is still enjoyed today but with less serious implications. Those young maidens in “jolly old England” often dressed in men’s trousers and pursued their prey. If a prospective groom denied the want-to-be bride, the law often intervened on the young woman’s behalf. In early cases, magistrates usually fined the young man, who was often forced to buy his unsuccessful female suitor a new gown or other useful gift. At some point, monetary fines were levied, which most bachelors gladly paid. Still, the stigma of being refused and rebuffed by your own true-but-unrequited love must have been shattering to Victorian female sensibilities. This style of procuring a husband was called Sadie Hawkins. During the Victorian Age, a large and interesting number of postcards depicted desperate love-deprived women waiting for the New Year’s Eve clock to strike one minute after midnight so they could pounce on unsuspecting bachelors during Leap Year. In some societies, this practice was only allowed during Leap Years on the 29th of February. Al Capp later brought Sadie Hawkins into his “Dog Patch” cartoon series along with Daisy Mae and Li’l Abner. Sadie Hawkins was known as the homeliest girl in the hollow, and her life’s goal was to pursue and catch a husband. In its present sense, Sadie Hawkins is still often observed but with a much lighter tone and without marriage as its final goal. Today, the tradition of Sadie Hawkins Day is often celebrated in high schools and on college campuses in the form of a social event such as a Valentine’s Day ball or homecoming dance. Change is good. If we are able to find our own mates today, we might be building better futures for marriage. It may be true that not all marriages last forever. Some flounder early on, while others last a good long time. Many marriages and the love stories that underscore them endure for a lifetime. Looking for love is not always easy. Sometimes, it’s downright elusive. I found the love of my life when I wasn’t looking and when marriage was the last thing on my mind. If you are blessed to have found a soul mate, hang on to him. Don’t try to change him too much. Some expert once said that marriage is a 50/50 proposition. It seems more like a 100/100 venture, with both parties willing to give all they’ve got to keep that love story alive. WE February 2020

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Fresh Concept

Age Healthier! Live Happier with New Hormones By Janette Calabro

Hormones are one of the most essential regulatory systems in our body. They impact our sleep, sexual development, reproduction, and metabolism, along with other basic functions. They act as our body’s messengers by communicating with tissues and organs as they travel through the bloodstream. As we age, hormone levels naturally dip. That’s when men and women are often on a quest to replace them. The process of menopause (including perimenopause and post-menopause) that usually occurs in a woman’s 40s or 50s may trigger a host of unpleasant symptoms, including night sweats, brain fog, hot flashes, and mood swings that keep women up at night. These are all signs of waning hormones. In contrast, men start to lose their normal range of testosterone levels after they peak at age 20 years, triggering symptoms such as low energy, loss of libido, loss of muscle mass, and weight gain. Low-T is a common household term these days, usually targeting men older than 30 years. The good news is that relief from hormonal imbalance symptoms comes in many packages. A common treatment for both men and women is hormone replacement therapy (HRT). When your quality of life diminishes because symptoms are overwhelming or severe, it’s probably time to consider HRT. As with any medical treatment, it’s important to examine the risks and benefits of HRT before beginning treatment. While many women and men have found relief with HRT, it’s not for everyone. For example, if you have had (or have a family history of) breast cancer, heart disease, high blood pressure, liver problems, blood clots, or stroke, your physician may direct you toward an alternative treatment. While you can take some responsibility to reduce health risks by actively staying healthy—exercise regularly, eat a healthy diet, don’t smoke, you know the drill—it’s best to take time to talk with your doctor to see if HRT makes sense for you. HRT is often prescribed by obstetrician/gynecologists (OB-GYNs) for women, since these physicians manage a woman’s health during her reproductive years and after. For both women and men, internists (internal medicine physicians) and family practitioners are usually board-certified to meet comprehensive healthcare needs, including HRT. Med spas often have medical directors who can prescribe HRT, as well. It’s important to decide with your healthcare provider how long you should stay on HRT. Treatment time is often a few years, depending on the goals of treatment (for example, menopausal symptom relief is shorter-term than osteoporosis risk reduction). Start by answering some pertinent questions related to what phase you’re navigating. WebMD has a list of related questions to ask yourself: Do you have abnormal vaginal bleeding? Is there a history of breast cancer in your family? Do you have a history of endometrial or uterine cancer? Do you currently have, or have you had, venous thrombosis (blood clots in the lungs or veins)? Do

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you have chronic liver disease? Do you smoke? Do you have gallbladder disease? HRT may bring higher risks if you answered yes to any of the above; talk it over with your doctor. If HRT comes with health risks, why would you take it? The truth is that low hormone levels bring health risks, too. Loss of estrogen carries risk for heart disease, colon cancer, osteoporosis, and diabetes. For women in menopause, HRT helps to balance estrogen and progesterone around the time that natural levels go AWOL. Some women seem to breeze right through menopause with easier-to-remedy symptoms like dry skin, a decrease in muscle strength, or vaginal dryness. Other women struggle with more problematic symptoms like difficulty sleeping at night, weight gain, reduced sexual desire, moodiness, anxiety, or depression. Thinning hair is common, as are muscle and joint pain. Symptoms are as individual as we are. What worked for your best friend may not be best for you. That’s why it’s vital to develop a specific plan with your general practitioner or gynecologist. The best plan for you depends on your health, what you want to accomplish with HRT, and your preference for pills, creams, or patches as a hormone delivery method. If you have a uterus, both estrogen and progesterone are usually prescribed. Estrogen or estrogen combined with progestin are the most common protocols for women without a uterus. If you’re otherwise healthy, HRT is generally prescribed at the lowest dose for the shortest time needed. Once you reach age 59 or older, or if you’ve been on treatment for more than five years, it might be time to look at cutting back or stopping altogether—again, talk it over with your healthcare practitioner. How you decide to take your replacement hormones is a personal choice and depends partly on which hormone combination you’re taking. Possible delivery methods can include a tablet, a gel, a vaginal cream, a patch, or a pellet. Let’s take a look at a few different ways to replace those hormones that have gone missing. BioTE uses customized hormone pellets for both men


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and women. The pellet implants are inserted through a small incision under the skin, which is numbed first for comfort. The incision is covered with a bandage, and the pellet starts to release small doses of hormones into the bloodstream. The tiny pellets are about the size of a grain of rice. They dissolve naturally, leaving no trace, and they usually last between three to six months before needing replacement. Expect a tailored bloodwork analysis before a physician approves treatment. In fact, most hormone replacement requires comprehensive bloodwork, personal medical history, and lots of discussion. Bioidentical hormone replacement therapy (BHRT) treats all the same things as traditional HRT—the difference is that the hormones in BHRT are chemically identical to those produced in the human body. (It’s worth noting that some traditional HRT formulations also include bioidentical hormones.) They are generally synthesized from plants. Like traditional HRT, these hormones are available in various treatment modalities, including patches, creams, pills, and injections. Another factor in your choice of hormone delivery method may depend on your treatment goals. Topical HRT uses estrogen gels, normally applied once a day to the upper arm, shoulder, or inner thigh. Women with a uterus should add progesterone, usually in pill form, to protect the endometrial lining. Topicals are often used for short-term symptoms. Vaginal creams, tablets, or rings are considered local HRT—that is, they contain a small amount of estrogen that is used specifically to relieve vaginal dryness or urinary symptoms. Their limited nature means they probably won’t relieve hot flashes, bone loss, or other long-term effects from menopause, but they carry lower risk of systemic adverse effects. Oral hormones include a wide variety of tablet or pill forms,

usually taken once or twice a day, and these doses can be estrogen only or a combination of hormones. As with many medications, you’ll need to be patient—though you’ll likely see some symptom relief soon after starting treatment, it can take up to a year to get the dosage just right. Patches may contain estrogen alone or may be combined with progesterone (or testosterone, for men). The patch is usually applied once or twice a week on clean skin below the waist. Depending on your doctor’s advice, patches can be used to relieve short-term or longer-term symptoms. A man’s transition point into the period of life with lower testosterone is not as clear-cut as menopause, but doctors do know that most men are losing testosterone regularly by age 30 years. Men may need an energy boost and help preventing significant diseases. Symptoms of low testosterone include loss of libido, fatigue, and decreased muscle mass. Men may feel irritable, often experiencing many of the same symptoms as women (dry skin, thinning hair, brain fog, and moodiness). Testosterone pellets placed under the skin are one form of hormone replacement for men. Crystallized testosterone delivers a slow and steady dose for up to six months. Men can also use gels, patches, or injections, as women do. Increased libido, energy levels, and muscle mass are usually apparent within months of starting treatment. Aging can’t be avoided, but replacement hormones may help you avoid some of aging’s irritating symptoms. Talk to your doctor about taking a step into a happier, healthier life with hormone replacement therapy. Odds are, you won’t regret it. Sources for this article included: healthgrades.com, usnews.com, webmd.com, and mayoclinic.org. WE

ew pat ie nt s who n t a re g y n a m e “We have se e n so ion magazine. W it d E s n’ e m o W saw our ad in fessionalism ro p ir e h t r fo ff t he s ta value A nita and rit ten about w e v a h y e h t s ar t icle se and t heir gre at Be c ause of t he . rs a e y w fe t s us over t he la to c he ck us d e id c e d e v a h eople ar t icles, many p e n’s Edit ion!” m o W , u o y k n a h out. T t ime De ntal e if L t a m a e T e —Th

February 2020

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Interiors by Design

How to Sell Your Home What You Need to Know

By Robyn V. Powell

If you’ve been thinking of selling your home soon, you’ll be happy to hear that predictions for a competitive housing market for 2020 remain very strong. With home prices up over 3.3 percent from last year and current mortgage rates remaining low, demand for homes is high. The fact remains, however, that selling your home is a major transaction with lots of moving parts. Whether you’re a few weeks or a few months away from placing a For Sale sign on your lawn, arming yourself ahead of time with the right information is the key to a less stressful experience. A successful home sale requires some strategic planning. Your first priority is finding the right real estate agent—one who will provide excellent service, negotiate the best deal, and sell your home for the most money in the shortest amount of time. Experienced agents will give your home a much-needed online presence through the Multiple Listing Service (MLS) and will develop a targeted strategy to market your home to their extensive network of buyers and agents. If you’re like most homeowners, your home is your biggest financial asset. You’ve invested time and money and created memories in it. It’s important not to allow these factors to cloud your judgment when setting a price. Remember: Financially speaking, your home is only worth what the market will pay. The best way to determine price is to have your agent run a

comparative market analysis (CMA). This free report provides an analysis of comparable homes recently sold in your area and allows your agent to more accurately predict what buyers will pay for your home. You want an agent who will walk you through the analysis and help you understand how your home stacks up against the competition. Then you can work together to set a price based upon facts, not emotion. With so many people starting their home search online, having professional photos is a must. It’s important to stand out from the crowd! The goal of online photos is to convince browsers to arrange a showing. No matter how beautiful your home is, poor quality photos can mean that potential buyers never even set foot on your property. Many home sellers wonder what upgrades bring the most return on investment. Kitchens and bathrooms are the most important rooms to buyers, but rather than investing in an expensive renova- ›››

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tion right before you sell, consider cosmetic changes. Installing new hardware, replacing or refacing cabinet doors, and updating light fixtures won’t break the bank, and a fresh look always provides some payback. Hire professional contractors to make sure that upgrades are done properly. A pre-sale home inspection is money well spent. Problems discovered during a buyer’s inspection can cost you the sale or more money than it would actually take to fix the problems. A pre-sale inspection eliminates this by bringing any issues to light ahead of time, allowing you to make necessary repairs before presenting your house to buyers. Not everything requires fixing; the roof, HVAC, electrical, and plumbing should take priority. Don’t forget to set the stage for showing your home in its best light. Have your home professionally cleaned, paying special attention to carpets, windows, and ducts. If you’re still living in your home, be sure to de-clutter before every showing. If you’re not living in your home anymore, consider having it professionally staged. Furnishing and decorating a home to make it look as appealing to buyers as possible has become a popular way to market homes. Staging is not meant to hide a home’s flaws. It accentuates the home’s positive features and shows buyers its potential by making spaces seem bigger and helping buyers imagine themselves living there. Professional stagers have a knack for making any space look amazing and will supply and arrange everything. Your real estate agent will work with a stager or have a few contacts to share. Staging costs can run from several hundreds of dollars to a few thousand. In some markets, staging can make the difference between a home selling promptly versus languishing on the market for months. In other markets, a beautifully staged home translates into thousands of additional dollars in the sales price. First impressions make a difference. Prospective buyers are more inclined to look inside when they like what they see outside. A well-maintained landscape can add as much as 10 percent to the value of your home. Blooming flowers, trimmed shrubbery, and a fresh coat of paint on the front door are simple ways to create the right curb appeal. While you’re out in the yard, place a For Sale sign on the front lawn and get ready to be showered with offers! Sources for this article included: consumerreports.com, redfin.com, and investopedia.com. WE February 2020

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Seasons of Life

55+ Communities Retirees Making the Most of Life

By Linda Barnes

With 10,000 people reaching age 65 every DAY in the United States, the demand for active retirement living is growing at an unprecedented rate. The answer for many is a community that gives them more freedom to enjoy their retirement years. Retirees opt to leave behind the chores involved in maintaining a larger family home. They would like someone else to do lawn care and, in some locales, snow removal. However, this still-active aging population expects activities and amenities in their retirement living arrangements. Retirement villages known as 55+ communities are geared toward quality housing, convenient locations, and a variety of amenities for this specific age group. Some 55+ communities offer the basics of clubhouse, fitness facility, pool, maintenance, security, and craft or hobby clubs. Others resemble an upscale resort in the luxurious extras they provide. Luxury communities are, naturally, more expensive but offer extra on-site amenities and services. Golf and resort communities include vacation-type amenities, while active senior communities offer a variety of recreational activities with an emphasis on healthy lifestyles. Age-restricted communities only allow residents of a certain minimum age—often 55 years, though some require a minimum of 62 years. For couples, only one of the two needs to meet the age requirement. Some communities allow a limited number of younger residents. A 55+ community in my neighborhood is allinclusive for a luxury lifestyle. It offers upscale oneand two-bedroom apartments that can be rented month to month. In addition to a professional staff and 24-hour-a-day service, abundant activities keep residents active and engaged. Dining choices include buffet-style or fine restaurant options. Experienced chefs prepare fresh, healthy entrees. Beverages and snacks are available at all hours. Residents may even opt to have meals delivered to their apartments. As is typical of many 55+ luxury communities, a full calendar of activities supports active pursuits such as walking, exercise classes, virtual bowling or golf, and weight training. Social activities include card clubs, music and drama, movies, and performances by local music and dance groups. Weekly trips are planned to local shopping malls. Social gatherings encourage building relationships and a sense of community. Religious services are held on a regular basis. Residents participate in meal and activity planning. Resort-type communities such as these offer concierge services, transportation, and housekeeping. The all-inclusive concept means you pay one price that includes meals, services, utilities, and amenities. Medical alert systems help keep

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residents safe, and some communities offer on-site medical care. Beautifully landscaped grounds contribute to a resort-style atmosphere. Walking trails promote fitness, and some encourage gardening in spring and summer. Communities with affiliated facilities in other cities may offer guest accommodations at no cost to residents who travel to those locations. Security is an important concern for retirees— in fact, many seniors would list that as one of the reasons they decided to move out of the family home. Some communities are gated to limit admittance. Others may have on-site security personnel. Designers consider the needs of seniors to ensure personal safety and accessibility. A clubhouse with swimming pool might provide a gathering place for homeowners. Location is important, with shopping, medical facilities, entertainment, and restaurants nearby. Clubs and interest groups help foster a sense of community that many seniors enjoy. Many boomers are avid golfers, so many developers design retirement communities around a golf course or near to one. This adds to the vacation-like atmosphere. Both homes and apartments may be offered. Larger complexes may house barbers, banking, pubs, and postal services. A concept worth considering is the transitional living community. In addition to independent living, these also offer assisted living and skilled nursing, all on one campus. Independent residents can remain in their community and receive assistance or skilled care as the need arises. Much information is available online for people considering a retirement community for themselves or their parents. Often, you can view floor plans and check out activity calendars. A virtual tour may also be provided. Be sure you understand all the requirements and charges before renting or purchasing, and—of course—visit in person. In an effort to market their communities, some offer get-acquainted meetings or lunches. It’s an exciting time for active retirees who have so many choices for the freedom and ease of living they seek. Sources for this article included: seniorliving.org, aarp.org, and stlouisfed.org. WE


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Spay and Neuter Your Pets! Support a Longer, Healthier Life By Brie Christensen

One of the many ways to help pets live long and healthy lives is to spay or neuter them when the time is right. These procedures benefit everyone: They bring health and behavioral benefits for pets, provide convenience for owners, and help control the crisis of homeless pets. Along with ensuring that the animal is unable to reproduce, these procedures also eliminate the heat cycle and certain instinctive breeding behaviors. Let’s start with spaying. In general, spaying helps prevent uterine infections and breast tumors in female animals. Experts recommend spaying animals prior to their first heat, in order to offer the best protection against these diseases. This protection isn’t the only upside, though. Animals that go into heat each month often urinate inside the house…a mess that most owners would rather avoid. When it comes to male animals, neutering prevents testicular cancer and some prostate problems. It should also be noted that an intact pet will try to find a mate and might even run away from home to do so. This could be dangerous for your pet, as well as other animals, as it poses the risk of an animal fight. A neutered male has much less testosterone, which can mean lower aggression and lower likelihood of marking its territory by urinating all over the house. Before scheduling the procedure, pet owners should inquire about any risks, find out how the animal will be monitored, and learn how long the recovery process might take. The recommended age for neutering is six to nine months, though pups as young as eight weeks can be neutered as long as they are healthy. Dogs can be neutered as adults, but complications are more common in older dogs, as well as in dogs that are overweight or have health issues. It’s considered safe for kittens as young as eight weeks old to be spayed or neutered. However, most vets advise owners to schedule the surgery before the cat reaches five months of age. There are various options available for neutering and spaying, so it’s always best to consult with a veterinarian before moving forward with the procedure. During surgical sterilization, certain reproductive organs are removed. Such is the case with the ordinary spaying procedure, ovariohysterectomy, in which the ovaries, fallopian tubes, and uterus are removed from a female animal. Orchiectomy is the typical neutering surgery, which removes the testes from a male dog or cat. Some pet owners opt for an alternative surgical option, such as hysterectomy, ovariectomy, or vasectomy. Check with your veterinarian to see if there are any specific instructions to follow before surgery (like no feeding after midnight the night before). The vet will provide instructions to follow during your animal’s recovery after the procedure. Although not ideal, it is not unusual for a pet to experience some physical discomfort after surgery. When this is the case, a veterinarian can advise on how to manage pain for your pet. In some

instances, medication can be prescribed. A speedy and comfortable recovery process begins with the pet’s environment at home. A quiet area indoors that is away from other animals is the best place for a pet to heal. Also, it’s important to ensure that pets are not attempting to move around too much—this means that jumping and running should be avoided for up to two weeks after the surgery, or longer, if recommended by a vet. To avoid post-surgical infection, pets should be prevented from licking the incision site. To help with this, healthy treats can be used to distract animals. Although it may seem like bathing your pet will help keep an incision clean, it’s critical to not bathe an animal for at least 10 days after an operation. If you have any questions about how to maintain a clean incision site, check with your vet. As a precaution, the incision site should also be checked every day. If the incision is open or shows any redness, swelling, or discharge, get in touch with your vet right away. Owners should also be on the lookout for any signs of strange behavior or illness after surgery. We’ve come to the last, and perhaps most obvious, benefit of spaying and neutering your animals: They won’t make more animals! Every year, many animals are euthanized because there simply are not enough homes to go around. When you spay or neuter your pet, you’re helping them be part of the solution. Spaying or neutering a pet is one of the most important health decisions an owner can make. Discuss the options with a veterinarian and then choose what is best for your animal. Ultimately, everyone benefits from the procedure: the pet, the owner, and society at large. Please spay and neuter your pets! Sources for this article included: aspca.org, avma.org, and pethealthnetwork.com. WE

February 2020

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Good Looks

Don’t Be Bent Out of Shape Get the Shape You Want

By Loretta McCollum

Are you bent out of shape about your body shape? Maybe you’ve noticed some saggy, baggy areas developing over the years. Perhaps multiple pregnancies (not to mention labors and deliveries) have put your body through the wringer, and it didn’t quite snap back. Maybe you’ve undergone surgical treatment for breast cancer and would like some reconstructive surgery to look like yourself again. Whatever your reasons for wanting to make a change to your body, there is likely a surgical procedure that can help you reclaim your body and your self-esteem. From tummy tucks to breast reconstruction to liposuction, there’s a body shaping procedure that can address the body part you’d like to change. Women typically seek out anti-aging cosmetic surgery beginning around age 40. Women with young children are opting for “mommy makeovers” in increasing numbers. The mommy makeover can be anything from just a tummy tuck to a multiple-procedure, customized makeover that also includes breast augmentation and liposuction. It’s essentially a group of procedures that make adjustments to the parts of the body most affected by pregnancy and childbirth. While there are benefits to having multiple procedures done at once (for example, less surgical time overall and only a single recovery period), it’s important to be sure that you’re done having children before undergoing these kinds of procedures. A tummy tuck can tighten abdominal muscles, diminish the

appearance of stretch marks, and eliminate excess skin and fat. In this procedure, the surgeon makes an incision along the lower abdomen to remove excess fat and smooth out abdominal skin. For liposuction, the surgeon creates multiple, tiny incisions into which a metal tube is inserted that sucks out fat cells. An anesthetic solution is administered to minimize discomfort. Women of all ages often opt for liposuction alone for treating stubborn areas like the hips, thighs, and upper arms—spots that can be particularly resistant to efforts to tone and shape with exercise. Lipo Light is a relatively new and non-invasive technique that blends tradition and technology. It combines LED light therapy with posttreatment physical exercise. The light therapy penetrates the skin and opens the fat cell walls, allowing the contents to escape. Once the fat escapes, it travels as fatty acids through the body to tissue, where it is then burned off during post-treatment exercise.

rs: e is rt e v d A r u O f O e n A Few Words From O “I have been an advertiser with Women’s Edition for a number of years. At first it was a stab in the dark; would this form of exposure work or would I need to look for another venue to get my services noticed? I have been very pleased with the quality of the magazine, the staff I have worked with, and most of all the quality of prospects who have become wonderful clients. I wholeheartedly recommend advertising in this publication.” —Pauli Hubbard, CFP with Creative Financial Services, Inc.

Creative Financial Services, Inc. 26


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A typical session includes 20 minutes of treatment followed by about 10 minutes of exercise. The initial treatment cycle is two treatments per week for four weeks. Many patients return for maintenance sessions. Lipo Light produces long-term results in conjunction with exercise and a healthy diet. An added benefit of Lipo Light is that it has the potential to increase collagen levels, firming the skin and enhancing the body-sculpting effects of the treatment. Another popular procedure is breast augmentation to increase breast size or change breast shape. This procedure utilizes breast implants or body fat transfers. It’s often used for breast reconstruction following a mastectomy or injury. Scarring is hidden as much as possible in skin folds, and incision scars fade over time. If, on the other hand, your breasts are too large already and are causing you inconvenience or back pain, a breast reduction surgery might be in order. Breast reduction may involve liposuction, surgical removal of tissue and skin, or both. Any licensed physician can perform cosmetic surgery, but it’s important to check out a physician’s training, experience, and track record. Board certification means that a surgeon has completed extra training and has been positively evaluated by other professionals. Board certification is important, but it’s not more important than experience. Be sure that the surgeon you choose is well-practiced in the specific procedure that you’re having done. Ask to examine before-and-after photos, including photos that were taken years after the procedure was done, to see how the results are aging on other patients. Another consideration is whether or not your insurance will cover the cost of the procedure. Generally speaking, cosmetic surgery is considered elective and is therefore not covered by insurance. In some cases, however, a surgical procedure that improves your appearance may also address an underlying health issue. For example, reconstructive surgery after trauma may be deemed medically necessary. Breast reduction may be covered if it alleviates back pain or other physical problems caused by the size of the breasts. Check with your insurance company about your specific coverage. If you’re ready to reclaim your body, don’t wait! There are more choices now than ever before to help you look and feel your best. Sources for this article included: americanboardcosmeticsurgery.org, thelipobelt.com, and plasticsurgery.org. WE

Our afternoon dance party As a mom, we know your family is why. Why you work so hard to make healthy choices every day so you can experience more of life’s precious moments together. We’ve got your back; to make sure more of those moments happen. But we can’t do it without you. While you’re serving more fruits and veggies at home, we’re impacting laws that help shape healthier communities — and it doesn’t stop there. You see, together we can make an extraordinary impact. Because when moms unite, real change happens. Join other moms and together let’s create a healthier generation of families. Life is Why.

Unite for change at LifeIsWhy.org/Moms

#familyiswhy February 2020

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Healthy Living

Incline Orthopaedics Restore Your Grip and Motion By Cheryl Lassota

“Above and beyond” is how patients Audrey and Marilynne describe Dr. Patrick D. Devanny’s attitude. Dr. Devanny and his team at Incline Orthopaedics work together to find the causes of musculoskeletal system problems. They treat a wide range of issues, including skier’s thumb, bicep tears, rheumatoid arthritis, and degenerative osteoarthritis. Dr. Devanny is known for specializing in elbow repair, using minimally invasive elbow arthroscopy to diagnose and treat painful elbow issues. Longtime patient Marilynne, age 76, mentions seeing Dr. Devanny in 2008 after suffering a serious wrist break when falling on ice. “I had broken the head of my wrist,” she recalls. “He T-plated it, and I have had full range of motion and full strength in it ever since. No issues, no pain. I highly recommend Dr. Devanny!” “In the last couple years, I’ve begun to see more patients with rheumatoid issues,” Dr. Devanny notes. “This is an autoimmune disease, where the body’s immune system begins to attack itself. It can be debilitating for those who don’t respond to oral medication. With rheumatoid arthritis, the joints are under attack. I can help surgically, especially with the hands. A little change can make a big difference for these patients. Even if I work on just one or two joints, it can change their lives drastically, as far as being able to care for themselves and perform simple daily tasks.” Dr. Devanny recalls one patient with severe rheumatoid arthritis in her hands. “She couldn’t comb her hair because she couldn’t grasp a comb,” he reflects. “After surgery on both her hands, she can comb her hair, eat, brush her teeth, and write—all things she couldn’t do before.” That patient, Audrey, considers it a “stroke of luck” that she was referred to Dr. Devanny. “Over the course of the last year and a half, I have had almost all of the knuckles replaced in my fingers and both my hands,” Audrey shares. “The technical term is ‘arthroplasty,’ but I refer to them as ‘knuckle installations.’ With every new installation, my hands have become more useful. Before the surgery, I had to wear mittens; now, I can wear actual gloves. Little things mean a lot!” Dr. Devanny concurs, adding, “It was such a great gift for me to be able to take care of her.” Dr. Devanny enjoys change and likes stepping outside his comfort zone. Since last June, he has expanded his work by maintaining a once-a-week clinic attached to a surgery center in Castle Rock. “It adds variety to my work,” he says. “I do more shoulder and elbow work there. Dr. David Labosky, my partner since I came to town, steps in to see

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Colorado Springs patients for one day a week or when I’m out of town.” Nurse practitioner Jason Valle is a recent addition to Dr. Devanny’s practice. “Jason is eager to learn and brings energy to the office,” Dr. Devanny reports. “I’m excited to teach Jason and share patient care with him. We have so much in common, both at work and life at home. Having Jason here revives my energy, breaks up routine, and helps me to think about the details of my job which have become routine.” Originally from the Niagara Falls area of upstate New York, Dr. Devanny began his medical career with studies at the University of Rochester School of Medicine and Dentistry. He completed his residency at the University of Vermont, in Burlington, and did his fellowship at Allegheny General Hospital, in Pittsburgh. He has been practicing medicine for over 20 years and has been in Colorado Springs since 2004. Dr. Devanny’s personal interests include mountain biking and aerobic fitness. He also enjoys the “great stress relief” found in joining his son, Colin, for evenings of indoor climbing. “My wife, Kiki, and I go to Cheyenne Mountain State Park to bike in the summer and fall. It’s amazing that it exists in town, yet you can feel like you’re in the middle of the mountains and woods—just five minutes into a ride,” he says. If you are in need of specialized and comprehensive care of the upper extremities, contact Dr. Devanny at Incline Orthopaedics, located at 2960 North Circle Drive, Suite 125, in Colorado Springs. Appointments can be scheduled by calling 719-471-4994. They will take care of you with great skill and the utmost respect. As patient Audrey concludes, “Dr. Devanny is kind, truthful, and has a great sense of humor. You can tell what kind of a person a doctor is by the way you are treated by the office staff. I am always greeted with genuine professionalism and warmth by Dr. Devanny and his team, be it at the office or in the hospital.” WE

Dr. Patrick D. Devanny


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February 2020

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Creative Financial Services, Inc. Greetings to you! Have you prepared yourself financially for the coming year? It is time to set up a financial “physical” with your financial advisor or if you do not have one, to give Creative Financial Services a call. We have over 60 years of joint experience to help you set and accomplish your financial goals. Please give us a call at 719-471-4774. We are located at 1216 Suite 200, W. Colorado Ave. Colorado Springs. We are here to Earn Your Trust and Grow Your Wealth. Ansley Marie’s Salon & Spa At Ansley Marie’s Salon & Spa, we offer hair, skin, waxing, and makeup services! All of the products that we use are paraben-free and chemical-free. Most of our products are vegan and gluten-free, as well. Ansley Marie has been a licensed aesthetician for 11 years. She loves educating her clients on how to know what their bodies are saying and how to combat some skin issues from the inside out. We offer complimentary skin consultations with our licensed aestheticians as well as complimentary hair consultations with our licensed cosmetologists. This isn’t just a job for us—it’s our passion! Floor Craft LLC Floor Craft, a 3rd generation, family-owned business, is Colorado Springs’ oldest floor covering store. We just celebrated our 75th Anniversary! If you are thinking about upgrading your flooring, wall tile, or backsplash, come in and view our large showroom for ideas and inspiration! Our experienced sales staff can assist you in making the right choices to fit your lifestyle and budget. We also provide samples to take home to match your existing décor, and will provide Free Estimates! Check us out and experience the unique difference at Floor Craft! Call for more information 719-633-7724 and visit our website at www.FloorCraft.us.

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Colorado Springs Hypnosis Ltd. One of our favorite things about hypnosis is how great it feels. So would you like to relax? We mean REALLY relax. There are so many ways that people can pamper themselves these days. And we don’t blame them. With hypnosis, you can experience deep mental relaxation. In a trance you can take a vacation, explore a dream, or, just go so deep, that nothing could ever bother you. Call today at 719-900-1112 or visit at www.coloradospringshypnosis.com to experience relaxation like you never have before. The Nature Conservancy The Nature Conservancy’s mission is to preserve plants, animals, and natural communities that represent the diversity of life on Earth by protecting the lands and waters they need to survive. We’ve been working in Nebraska to do just that. The Nature Conservancy’s Niobrara Valley Preserve is one of the largest Conservancy preserves in the U.S., and a model for grassland management using bison, cattle and fire. It encompasses majestic pine-clad canyons, extensive grasslands, and a 25-mile stretch of the Niobrara River. Visitors can enjoy the beauty of the preserve year-round, and of special interest is the bison herd grazing in the vast open prairie. Visitors are welcome to walk the new hiking trail west of the Preserve mailbox (foot traffic only, please). The trailhead includes a small parking area and information kiosk. You have your choice of the long loop or the short loop, both with grand views of the Niobrara River. You may enjoy the Norden chute at the Norden Bridge, as well. Fishing is allowed with a Nebraska fishing permit. Please, no diving, camping, or campfires. The Nebraska Natural Heritage Program identified the Niobrara Valley Preserve as the biological crossroads of the Great Plains. To date, 581 plant, 213 bird, 86 lichen, 70 butterfly, 44 mammal, 25 fish, 17 reptile, and 8 amphibian species have been recorded at the Preserve. Explore the mosaic of prairies, forests, canyons, springs, and riverfront that you’ve helped protect. Plan your visit: email the Preserve at amanda.hefner@tnc.org or call 402-722-4440.

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February 2020

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Income Outcome

Thank You, Big Al Facing Fear My father, Big Al, had a lot on his plate. He was an entrepreneur who had a family to support—a big family. Six kids. He was an incredibly hard-working man who struggled with fear and worry. Big Al was constantly seeking out ways to get past the negativity that fear and worry brought into his life. One day, he discovered the book “How to Stop Worrying and Start Living” by Dale Carnegie. As I recall, it changed his life. The first time my dad talked to me about this author, I was in my teens. I remember these words from the book on how to deal with worry: “1. Ask yourself, ‘What is the worst that can possibly happen?’ 2. Prepare to accept it if you have to. 3. Then calmly proceed to improve on the worst.” —Dale Carnegie As an adult, I have read—and reread—this book on many occasions. When I have had situations in my life that create gutwrenching fear, I have found myself reciting these words. It’s as if my dad comes to me, kicks me in the butt, and reminds me of these very wise words from Dale Carnegie. We all face fear and worry in our lives. Instinctually, when human beings face fear, they experience what we know as “fight or flight” syndrome. Some of us take flight—we run away and put our heads under the covers. Others of us get angry and fight. At

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By Janet Van deWalle

times in my life, I have reacted to fear in both of these ways. At those times when I run, I eventually crawl out from underneath those covers and begin to fight. It’s hard, but when I finally get the courage to take on the fear, I find myself calming down. I find myself thinking more clearly. “One of the worst features about worrying is that it destroys our ability to concentrate.” —Dale Carnegie Looking back on Big Al’s life, I have a broad view of what fears he had to get under control. He was a very strong, hard-working, compassionate man who had many demons…just like we all do. I so appreciate his constant search on how to make his life better. Big Al discovered Dale Carnegie and shared him with me. Thank you, Big Al. “The only thing we have to fear is fear itself.” —Franklin D. Roosevelt “How to Stop Worrying and Start Living” was first published in 1946. The lessons it teaches are as relevant today as they were 74 years ago. If you haven’t read it yet, I think Big Al would encourage you to do so! WE


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Share the Love Research Your Family’s History When you love something, you want to know more about it, right? Doesn’t it make sense, then, that we try to find out more about family and our ancestors? Recently, I joined a family ancestry group. Some in our group had little or no knowledge of their ancestry. A few knew their immediate family members only, and some could trace their family back for generations. Jay was adopted and had never looked into his biological parents, but his interest was piqued as he got older. After several years of digging through records, he was pleasantly surprised to find several half-siblings. There are many ways to find out about your family. Depending on what you know already, it’s possible to find birth or marriage records and even immigration information. For more personal information, listen in as your elders reminisce while looking through photographs. A cousin of mine researched our family tree. It begins with my mother’s grandparents (she called them Grosvater und Grosmutter) migrating to South Dakota from Luxembourg after the Civil War. Each branch covers four to five generations. I’ve heard many stories about the trek from Iowa. While visiting Salt Lake City, we decided to visit the Genealogy Library and found a book tracing my father-inlaw’s family back five generations (complete with pictures) to Columbus, Ohio. Shortly thereafter, we received an offer in the mail for the exact same book! It’s now in our library.

Support the Veterans in our lives.

By Marge Shoemaker, BS, MS

We knew my mother-in-law’s immediate family well. The two sisters and their families even shared a duplex after World War Two. While sorting through boxes of papers and photos, I came across a typed sheet, tucked into a funeral keepsake booklet, of Frederick Adams’ genealogy dating to early 1700 New England… he was my late husband, Cliff’s, great-great-great grandfather. We didn’t see much of my dad’s family, which was divided by distance. His parents and one sister lived in California; the other sister lived in Minnesota. Dad’s work required us to relocate nearly every year…I went to 12 schools from first grade through high school. Mom checked the phone book in every town for someone with the same last name. While my younger brother was in the Navy, he found a “Harry Vercoe” listed in Australia. Knowing Australia’s reputation as a penal colony, we dubbed this unknown relative “Uncle Harry the Horse Thief.” I recently came across a picture of Uncle Harry—he was no thief. I’ve been fortunate to acquire enough family history over the years to give my kids a sense of their ancestry. How much can you pass on to your kids? Talk to parents and grandparents while they’re still around. Listen to their stories. Oral history is more interesting than reading a history book. Share the love! Editor’s Note: Marge has three children, two grandchildren, and numerous nieces and nephews. She holds advanced degrees in education. Her life’s mission is to teach everyone that kids are people, too. WE

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View from the Top

Bloom Bar & Co. The Business and Beauty of a Bloom By Stacie S. Gonzalez

Imagine yourself in a shop where a fresh, earthy aroma drifts through the air. Surrounded by beautiful flowers, you pause for a moment, close your eyes, and inhale. A florist passes by, carrying a container of delicate lavender; he smiles and greets you by name. Maybe you’re there to brighten a coworker’s day; perhaps you need a bouquet of blooms in a hue that expresses love or loss; maybe you need a gentle reminder that the world is an inspiring, wondrous place. At Bloom Bar & Co., these life-affirming scenarios play out every day. “It’s about making flowers magical,” explains Andrew Oliver. Andrew and his fiancée, Jen Maraia, are co-owners of Bloom Bar & Co. The couple is new to the floral business, but they have tripled the original owner’s best month in sales since they opened in July 2019. They attribute much of their success to their use of a beverage bar concept: walk up to the counter, tell the bartender what you fancy, and watch as your order is hand-crafted using the finest ingredients: flowers. “We do things differently here,” says Jen. “We customize everything to your expectations. When people come in, they can purchase a single rose or a handful of different stems by going to the coolers and selecting what they like. Then our florists either arrange the flowers in a vase or hand-tie them into a bouquet.” Jen and Andrew met as new graduate nursing residents in 2013 and began dating the following year. They will marry next September. Why the leap from nursing to flowers? “It was an opportunity that landed in my lap,” says Andrew. “A friend had owned the shop for eight months when his wife developed some health issues. It was too much, so he put the shop up for sale. Prior to that, the space was a flower shop for over 30 years.” Andrew is also co-owner of Oliver’s Deli and Colorado Crust Pizza Co.—anchor stores in the same shopping center. Blessed with business experience and an entrepreneurial spirit, he could envision Bloom Bar & Co.’s potential. “Flowers are like food,” says Andrew. “You have to control the cost of something that’s perishable. It’s also very subjective.” Even with business experience, running a flower shop with no experience in the industry sounds risky. How do you do it? “You find a genius like Nick Walker,” explains Jen. “Nick has been in floral design for over 10 years. He has received eight Kennedy Center Awards in design, and his artistry with flowers is very dramatic and different. Nick and his

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husband, Jerry Ditter (also a floral specialist), helped us conquer our steep learning curve.” Nick oversees Bloom Bar & Co.’s flowers as well as wedding and event consultations. Jerry manages the shop and supervises flower deliveries. “Organizing 35 deliveries each day is a big task,” says Andrew. Three talented designers—Leana, Grant, and Lilly—round out the team. “They listened to our ideas for my mom’s funeral wreath,” says customer Rebecca. “It was a beautiful experience working with their designers.” “I love what I’m doing,” says Nick. “I have degrees in commercial photography, studio art, and art administration, so this falls right in my career path. It’s great to create things I enjoy and that I know other people will enjoy.” Customer Jayme shares her experience: “So amazing! Great selection, good prices, and they even sent me a photo of my order before they delivered it.” The Bloom Bar & Co. team enjoys innovating and being creative with flowers. For example, “Where the Wild Things Bloom for Autumn” is an arrangement designed by florist Leana. “The sunflowers, daisy mums, and alstroemeria mirror her distinct style: bold, unique, and wild,” says Jen. Besides offering price and color variety, Bloom Bar & Co. can special-order premium flowers like the peony, the ranunculus, and the Queen Protea: a big, splendid, tropical flower with one stem, one bud, and one bloom that takes a year to grow. A myriad of locally made items, such as tea, chocolate, preserves, soaps, candles, plants, and cards, make great add-ons to round out a floral gift. Customers can attend floral design workshops or stop in for weekday “happy hours” to buy discounted flowers. “We’re trying to create a communitycentered experience,” says Jen. “I enjoy knowing people when they walk in the door. It’s fun to get to know our community.” Bloom Bar & Co. is located at 205 West Rockrimmon Boulevard, Suite A, in Colorado Springs. For more information, please call 719-548-8646 or visit bloombarandco.com. WE

Andrew Oliver and Jen Maraia


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February 2020

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To Your Good Health

Pediatric Dentistry The Right Fit for Kids

By Leslie Byrne

Let’s face it—not everybody loves going to the dentist. We all probably know a few adults who avoid it. If seeing the dentist is stressful for adults, just imagine (or try to remember) how overwhelming it might be for a child. Luckily, professionals in the field of pediatric dentistry are working to make children’s early experiences at the dentist fun and relaxing. Children who grow up unafraid to visit the dentist are likely to continue vital oral care during adulthood. Most kids see a pediatrician for their medical care, so having their dental health needs met by someone trained in caring exclusively for children makes a lot of sense. One of the biggest benefits of having your child see a pediatric dentist is having potential dental problems identified as soon as possible. Preventative care early on can save money and treatment before a child’s mouth and jaw are finished growing. Although all dentists are trained to care for both children and adults, a pedodontist, more commonly known as a pediatric dentist, completes two or three additional years of training after completing dental school. These professionals learn how to handle a wide range of childhood dental concerns. They are experts on how teeth develop, and they know how to help with dental problems caused by things like long-term thumb-sucking or pacifier use.

Their training includes more than just caring for teeth— they also learn how to talk to children, how to make them feel more comfortable at the office, and how to decrease fears about seeing the dentist. They are practiced in several techniques to calm a child so that important dental care can be completed. They also study child behavior, psychology, physical growth, and how to provide dental care for children with special needs. For children who are uncomfortable in new situations or are easily frightened, seeing a specialist who is trained to work with kids can really put them at ease and make going to the dentist a better experience. This becomes especially important if your child needs to be seen several times to resolve a problem. In keeping with the goal of making children feel relaxed and welcome, pediatric dental offices are designed with kids in mind.

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They are often brightly and cheerfully decorated and offer toys and games that children can play with during their visits. The equipment is scaled down to fit children, and the instruments are designed to be comfortable in a child’s mouth. The exam chair is usually smaller and decorated to appeal to children. Many offices have televisions showing favorite cartoons or movies that children can watch while the dentist works. Despite the cheerful design and playful atmosphere of a pediatric dental office, the work that gets done there is just as serious as at an adult dentist’s office. Pediatric dentists focus on preventative care. They can identify problems early, so treatment can be started as soon as possible, making the overall treatment experience easier. They can help with behavior issues such as thumb-sucking or pacifier overuse. They also treat children who have suffered dental injuries from sports or play. They provide fluoride treatments, apply sealants, and repair cavities. Pediatric dentists use the latest preventative treatments and can alert parents that a visit to the orthodontist is likely in a child’s future. A pediatric dentist and an orthodontist can work together to ensure a child’s dental care is appropriate while permanent teeth come in and a child’s mouth grows. If braces or other corrective devices are needed, the orthodontist can step up. In some cases, a pediatric dentist is also trained as an orthodontist—this can really streamline a child’s dental care. Once a child develops a trusting relationship with a pediatric dentist, parents often ask when it is appropriate to switch to a general dentist. Many kids see a pediatric dentist through their teen years, since the face and jaw continue to grow until adulthood. Parents can also wait until their teens tell them that they want to change to a general dentist. Kids often switch when they turn 18; many insurance companies only cover pediatric dental care through age 19 years. Parents should check their insurance policy to find out when their insurance company no longer covers pediatric dental care. Whether your child is 12 months old or 12 years, a pediatric dentist is the right decision to set your child on a path to a lifetime of good oral health. Make an appointment today! Sources for this article included: colgate. com, aapd.org, and healthychildren.org. WE February 2020

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Home Works

Hardscaping Planning Patios, Pavement, and More!

By Anne Yankus

It may seem like it’s a little early in the season to start thinking about spring landscaping, but that’s exactly why it’s the perfect time to start planning! Hardscaping elements like patios, pavers, retaining walls, decorative concrete, heated driveways, decks, and railings all require more than a simple trip to the hardware store, so having a good plan in place ahead of time is essential. The first item you want to consider planning is a patio. Traditionally, patios have been plain concrete slabs, but there are so many more design choices to give your outdoor living space a natural and pleasant aesthetic. Decorative concrete can be stamped with patterns or dyed with coloring agents (proper maintenance is required to avoid cracking or fading). Alternatively, stones like flagstone, bluestone, and limestone are great choices that bring a natural look and can be chosen to match your home’s siding. Brick will add a refined, Old World feel to your backyard, but it will have higher maintenance and upkeep issues because of its porous nature and penchant for attracting moss. To combine the aesthetic of stone and brick with the affordability, durability, and ease of poured concrete, consider concrete pavers. They come in two types: interlocking or architectural slabs. Interlocking slabs were invented as an alternative for paved brick roads, making them sturdy materials

that can even be used for driveways. They do lack the natural aesthetic that you can get with architectural slabs, which have a much smoother and stone-like look to them but aren’t durable enough to drive on. Whether they are purely decorative or providing structural support to the yard, retaining walls don’t get the credit they deserve. Retaining walls can turn a crumbling landscape into something sturdy and long-lasting or punch up a gently sloping yard into one that really stands out. Gabion walls, pony walls, poured concrete, and dry stone steel walls are all types you definitely want to learn more about and consider, depending on what you’d like to accomplish with your yard. Gabion walls are usually made of welded metal mesh (typically galvanized, coated, or stainless steel wire) and filled with inorganic materials like rocks, bricks, or concrete debris. They’re great for

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retaining walls that need some height without having to resort to looking like a sound barrier on the freeway. Pony walls, on the other hand, are low barriers that are great for separating gardens and seating or as small backdrop features. Poured concrete walls are the most straightforward and versatile, since poured concrete can be molded into just about any size or shape you need, but they have the downside of being, well, plain concrete. Dry stone walls are a little more limiting in their function, being made of stacked natural stones without mortar. However, when constructed properly, they can last longer than your house. If you don’t want to build a full wall but would still like to delineate your flower beds with something that will last, decorative concrete edging might be the best fit. Poured concrete can be molded or stamped into any design you’d like, as well as allowing your gardens to have dynamic curves. Decorative concrete edges provide borders that are long-lasting and require almost no maintenance. Many of us live in areas of the country where snow is something we need to worry about for at least a quarter of the year. For the ultimate in luxury and safety, you can have a heated driveway installed. Heated driveways can be designed to keep specific portions of your driveway free of snow and ice all winter long‌ or you can just do the entire driveway. Heated driveways maximize safety and convenience, and they give you back all the time you would have spent with your shovel or snow blower! They can also extend the life of your driveway by eliminating the need to put down salt and caustic de-icing chemicals, which can eat away at your concrete over time. The last item on the hardscaping idea list is the deck. Simple wooden decks still reign supreme, but recent trends have added some unique materials in the mix. Mixed wood and metal, cable, glass and lumber, wild hog, and curved railings have seen a surge in popularity. Composite materials and bamboo have been gaining popularity as decking materials. Non-standard decks, like smaller decks or those with curves, are also becoming more common. Whether you decide to revamp your whole yard this spring or just focus on one feature, now is the time to start sketching plans and calling contractors! Sources for this article included: hgtv. com, thisoldhouse.com, gardenista.com, and bobvila.com. WE February 2020

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Positive Perspective

It’s Time to Idle that Motor The Virtue of Patience “Patience is the ability to idle your motor when you feel like stripping your gears.” —Barbara Johnson Ever since I was a little girl, I remember my mother, Anne, teaching us that patience was a virtue. If there is one virtue that I was not born with, it is patience. My mother had an incredible amount of patience. She raised six children, and I rarely remember her raising her voice, becoming irritated with us, or losing her temper. She somehow kept her cool. No drama. No raising her voice. She simply was calm. I really don’t know how she did it!

By Janet Van deWalle

gears. He suggests that I slow down—he knows when I’m going too fast and start to lose my patience. He has taught me to breathe to slow things down. He has taught me to take each situation one at a time, so that I am no longer a drama queen…well, most of the time, I’m not! “Just because some people are fueled by drama doesn’t mean you have to attend the performance.”—Cheryl Richardson

“Ships don’t sink because of the water around them; ships sink because of the water that gets in them. Don’t let what’s happening around you get inside you and weigh you down.” —Anonymous

The great thing about working on the art of patience is that, over time, it has helped to calm me down. It is amazing what the simple act of breathing will do to stop the “emotional flooding” that happens when we lose our patience. I recently read about emotional flooding. Thanks to science, we now know that when we lose our patience, when we get angry, when we get scared…our bodies release hormones that make us, well, a little crazy!

Over the last number of years, I have been reflecting on my lack of patience, and I have been working on developing this virtue. Sometimes, it works really well. Other times, I find myself stripping my gears!

“Patience and perseverance have a magical effect before which difficulties disappear and obstacles vanish.” —John Quincy Adams

“With love and patience, nothing is impossible.” —Daisaku Ikeda

I am striving to be more patient…to just breathe. I am getting better, and it feels SO MUCH BETTER!

My dear husband, Manny, is very attuned to my “energy.” I am fortunate that he can feel when I am heading toward stripping my

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