Family Times - Auckland - Winter 2013 by Twenty Seven Publishers

Caring for New ZealaNd’s Kids

Cyber-kids:

how modern technology affects today’s children

A news magazine and online resource for families

Winter wellness

Dr Libby Weaver’s top tips

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AUCKLAND / ISSUE 34 / Winter 2013

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inside this issue

Contents

Features

9 Baby and toddler

4 Resilience during winter

10 Sibling mayhem

5 Positive parenting after a challenging childhood Break the cycle!

6 The impact of modern technology on kids

Tips on keeping a calm household

19 Conscious parenting

Their sport, their game

20 Winter wellness

11 Fit families

16 Knit a winter scarf

Keep the kids busy with this timeless craft

Tablets, iPads, Twitter – the way of the future?

8 Learning disabilities

Identifying difficulties in learning and strategies to help

17 Digital goods

Online purchases versus buying from a store

18 Saving money

Help your child develop budgeting skills for life

About Us Spring iSSue 2012

Contributing Writers

Lee Keenan, John Cowan, Rose Blackett, Kay Douglas, Philippa Ross, Dr Victoria Metcalf, Diane Levy, Wayne Webb, Sally Kabak, Gill Connell, Dr Libby Weaver, Crissi Blair

Advertising Sales Tina Barriball, Shona Robb, Nicky Barnett, Jane Hunter, Katrina Wright, Naomh Cusin

Office Manager Raelyn Hay

Office Administrator Jackie Pithie

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Design & Production Moody Shokry

Advert Production Target Press Production Office

Editor Vanessa O’Brien

Assistant Editor Rachel Taniwha

Digital Editor Rochelle Savage 3

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Having fun with a cardboard box!

Beating the winter blues

Publisher

Distribution Printed and distributed quarterly approximately two weeks before each major school holiday. 65,310 distributed through early childhood centres, primary, intermediate schools and city council libraries. The opinions expressed in this publication are not those of the publisher unless indicated otherwise. No part of this publication may be reprinted without the expressed written permission of the publisher. Family Times is not responsible for unsolicited material. Family Times is funded and published solely through the support of its advertisers. They support us, please support them.

Make the most of your role as a parent

Comment 12 Kids’ view

We ask kids about their use of technology and rules around it

Dr Libby Weaver’s top tips for healthy eating in the colder months

Resource information

Discover the true beauty of the outdoors

14 Calendar of events 15 Entertainment 18 School Term Dates 23 Marketplace

21 Become a kiwi ranger 22 Top reads

Recommended reading these school holidays

Teachers inspire learning... nominate your

teacher or leader

TODAY

ASG Teaching Awards Cognition Education Leadership Awards Nominate at www.neita.co.nz Or call 09 308 0576 Closing date 30 September 2013 Nominations for early childhood educators, teachers, and leaders are invited from parents and grandparents, boards of trustees, parent associations, management committees, secondary student councils and community organisations.

From the editor

Resilience through the tough times of winter

As the colder weather harkens do you notice that you or members of your family/whanau start to feel more moody, tired and less positive? This can be common for many people.

ove it or hate it, technology is a big part of your child’s life in the 21st century. It has the potential to enhance their life experiences, but given its proliferation, it also has the potential to rule it. While a lot of parents have gotten super smart about setting time rules around the use of technology such as computers, phones, tablets, gaming consoles and the likes, there’s also the simple fact that it does keep the kids occupied – and quiet. And as smart as parents are, kids are in fact often the smarter ones when it comes to operating digital goods. They are, after all, digital natives in a digital age. It’s not unusual for my 7-year-old nephew to be found showing my mother how to do something on the computer, or for my 4-year-old nephew to Skype call me. It’s stuff like this that my generation dreamed of as kids. Imagine video calling people instead of using a landline? Now that seems passé. But there’s something important we have to remember here too. Kids have vivid imaginations, but less of a concept between what is real, and what is imagined. All the super-high-quality graphic games and 3D movies can create a world in their minds that’s hard to distinguish from the real one. And unlike traditional games, most technologybased involvement is done individually, which creates unique challenges for parents: how do parents safeguard their kids from predators? How is technology changing the way kids relate to each other, communicate and form friendships? Because let’s be honest - it’s even changing things amongst adults. There was a time when going to a café with friends meant good quality conversation – not checking Facebook messages and Twitter feeds. And call me old-

uilding up resilience during these times can help families. You won’t stop experiencing times of stress or difficulty, but you will develop skills that you can use to come through those times and move forwards positively. Give some of these strategies a try:

• Get the basics right and look after fashioned, but when it comes to reading a book, there’s something nostalgic about turning actual pages rather than sweeping the screen of a Kindle. I’m not down on technology at all. I think that when it’s used well it’s a powerful tool for education and amusement. I just don’t want to see today’s generation of kids miss out on the experience of building an outdoor hut, going fishing, or riding their bike because they prefer to do it virtually. This edition we tackle the technology issue, and talk to the experts about what it means for kids and parents today. Check out our main feature for the story, and also some tips on how to manage technology with your kids. Of course we have all the regular features too, with heaps of competitions, parenting tips, and entertainment ideas for the whole family. Enjoy!

•

yourselves really well – getting enough rest, eating healthily and exercising helps you a lot – consider taking some Vitamin C to avoid winter colds. Help the family recognise their feelings and find good ways to let out their stress – think of lots of physical, creative and everyday ways to release stress and tension before it builds up too much. Make your home environment lighter and brighter – open up curtains or blinds, sit closer to bright windows, move away clutter and change the furniture around for fun. Get family members outside everyday if you can – wrap up warmly and have a walk, bike ride or play outside. It can get energy flowing and help clear fuzzy thinking. Indoor pools can be great for winter swims! Make the most of your support circle of family/whanau and good friends – look for opportunities to spend time together, to talk, to laugh and to have fun. Invest some

time in those closest to you. Role model how it’s okay to ask for help when you really need it. • Use a sense of humour - often it’s good to laugh at things because seeing things in a different way can relieve tension. • Think creatively – when difficult things happen be willing to try new ways of doing things or problem solve. Ask others for their ideas as well. • Persevere – remind the family that summer is around the corner. Treat yourselves to something special every now and then as a reward for your perseverance. • If you or your family member feels negative or flat most of the time and unable to enjoy anything, finding professional help could make a difference. Visit a doctor, nurse or counsellor. Information provided by Skylight. Skylight supports those impacted by difficult life changes, loss, trauma and grief – whatever the cause and whatever the age. Visit www.skylight. org.nz, phone 0800 299 100, email rs@skylighttrust.org.nz.

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• The Independent Schools Expo gives parents and their kids the opportunity to make contact with representatives from Independent Schools including principals and teaching staff who are there to answer all the questions parents need to ask to assess a school’s suitability for their child. • The Expo showcases New Zealand’s leading Independent Schools, all in one location. In just a few hours parents can gather as much information about many schools as would otherwise take them several days. Discuss transport options to and from the schools. • Find a school which provides your child with quality teaching, secure environment & academic reputation, as well as offering discipline, values & tradition. • Explore different types of schools, educational philosophies, and special programs, day or boarding. • Find out about the admissions process, when to apply, and what schools look for in applicants. • Determine what budget you should be looking at and receive information about scholarships. Plan for the future! • “Staged Performances from schools throughout the day.” • Café on site, FREE Entry, FREE Parking, Easy Access... Bring the Whole Family... Don’t Miss It! For more info: Ph: (09) 448 5210

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Positive parenting after a challenging childhood It is a challenging task to bring If you are struggling to break the cycle the following suggestions provide a starting point up a child successfully. It can be for change. If it proves too difficult to implement deeply distressing to realise we these changes alone you need to seek help. There is no shame in this. In fact, having the are not being the parent we courage to seek necessary help to stop hurting want to be, particularly if we children is something to be proud of. have experienced inadequate Build up the relationship parenting ourselves as a with your child Spend quality time together, talking about youngster.

ost of us have the best of intentions when it comes to parenting. We may be very clear that we do not want to hurt our children as we were hurt as a child. When we begin with this kind of clarity we are likely to make significant steps towards achieving this goal. Yet, under stress, we may find ourselves slipping into old patterns and falling short of being the kind of parent we so want to be. The important thing is that if we know we are repeating a negative cycle, we face up to that and take immediate action to stop it. Angry parenting is destructive parenting. Our children are the precious vehicles of hope for the next generation. They deserve to have the very best beginnings we can give them.

The important thing is that if we know we are repeating a negative cycle, we face up to that and take immediate action to stop it. Angry parenting is destructive parenting.

experiences, sharing activities and having fun. Develop empathy and compassion. Imagine how you would feel in your child’s position and respond gently from that compassionate place.

Avoid getting into power struggles with a rebellious child

This escalates the conflict. The more calmly, firmly and respectfully you handle the challenges, the more likely the child will take notice.

Understand that there is a big difference between fair discipline and harsh punishment

Discipline implies a self-controlled lesson in consequences. Harsh punishment more often provides an outlet for the frustration of the parent. This can be damaging to the child.

Never discipline your child while angry

It’s very easy to become too punitive in this state. Imagine how frightening it would be, if you were at the mercy of an enraged person twice your size. Wait until you have calmed down and are thinking rationally before attempting to address the issue.

Take time out to allow yourself to calm down

At the very least, time out consists of disengaging from conflict with the child and refocusing your energy into calming down. Ideally it involves leaving the house and taking a walk if there is someone else available to care for the child. Be sure to let people know that you are taking time out and when you will be back. Half an hour is usually a suitable cool down time.

Learn to manage anger well

There are skills we can learn that will help us gain self control. There’s a fantastic range of anger management books available. Attend a course if necessary.

Learn new parenting skills

There are parenting courses and support groups available in most communities. Personal counselling can also help.

Put things right as quickly as possible If you know you’ve been destructive it’s vital to take responsibility as soon as possible. Remember the most important thing is the child’s wellbeing and safety. Change is possible; you can break the cycle. There is help available but you need to reach out for it. By Kay Douglas, author and psychotherapist.

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feature story

The pros and cons of modern technology for today’s kids It’s not uncommon to see a toddler on an iPad, children with smart phones and the latest “apps,” and to wonder, what has happened to kids these days? Rachel Taniwha investigates.

eing a child today is very different from previous generations; things are moving at an extra fast pace with modern technology such as the internet offering both benefits and disadvantages to parents, and increasingly, children. It’s no small thing. Sir Peter Gluckman, the prime minister’s chief science adviser, described the internet as “the most profound change” in communications since we learned to speak, and spoke about the impact of the technological world on children’s and adolescent health and behaviour in a report for the Families Commission earlier this year.

Computers – the way of communicating?

Computers were a rare luxury in schools a generation ago – perhaps just a dedicated computer room and limited use for pupils, with limited capabilities as well. Comparatively, technology today is mind-boggling. Now social networking means instant contact at anytime with anybody in the world, plus the bonus of virtually living vicariously through the computer screen. With web cams and online live streaming, it’s as simple as a click of the mouse.

It’s this topic that Sir Peter explored. Modern technology has changed the way we communicate and interact – from verbal and personal, to electronic. And electronic forms of communication that exclude body language, such as text messages and Tweets – leave a lot of room to be misinterpreted or misunderstood. Stuart Wright, of UCANDO, is a leading New Zealand facilitator of Accelerated Learning and Whole Brain Learning Techniques. Wright believes that technology, with all its positives, is now encouraging learning by doing things at great haste without any logical analysis or even concern for the consequences. “The whole culture of text messages and computer games is about speed and instant hits rather than more profound or detailed ways of handling information.”

“Today’s children really are digital natives and soon even the most technologically-savvy parents will be left behind.” Belinda Milnes, interim chief commissioner, Families Commission. How technology influences brain development

Sir Peter suggested that the most important period for developing resilience is in early childhood when there is greater ability to influence brain development. He described

today’s children as the guinea pigs in “a new world we don’t fully understand.” “The digital world is leading to different ways in which the brain develops, different environments in which we learn . . . and it does seem to be having impacts on cognitive, social and emotional development,” he said. Wright agrees, saying that the nervous systems of today’s tots, tweens and teens are constantly being trained to watch, not listen. “All those fast-moving primarily visual images that this generation is constantly bombarded with every day arouse the right hemisphere at the expense of the left side. What is the left responsible for?

Language proficiency skills, logical sequence and reasoning.”

Are our kids taking more risks?

The Parenting Place creative producer, John Cowan, says that with all the technological know-how, children lack something adults have owned for years - a properly functioning prefrontal cortex. “That part of the brain handles risk assessment and social behaviour, and brain research says it isn’t working properly until a person is in their mid-twenties … so your young person might be bright and clever but

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feature story you have instincts, wisdom and risk-assessment skills that they won’t have for another decade.” The Families Commission’s interim chief commissioner, Belinda Milnes, says she has tried to encourage her two daughters (aged 8 and 10) to take calculated risks after they have thought through what could go wrong. “For example we might say, “Sure you can jump off that shed roof, but what do you think is the worst that might happen? Do you think you can do something to make it safer? Do you still think it’s a good idea?” It doesn’t always stop them but I guess at least they are learning cause and effect and to take responsibility for their own decisions.”

A pre-digital world?

Cowan says that parents can remember a time before mobile phones and home computers, but kids can’t - their world is digital. “They live in a connected world; they know technology and they love it. They are the first generation that have to show their parents how to do things, rather than vice versa. Can we really guide and protect our kids in a world that they know better than we do?” With guidance, he believes parents can. “While we may not be as familiar with all the gadgets, we know what our kids are doing. They are chatting, flirting, looking at pictures, shopping, fighting, listening to music, making friends, watching movies, arguing, reading, joking, playing games, hanging out… in other words, the same things kids have done for ages, but they’re doing it digitally, doing it more and, increasingly, doing it without adult coaching or protection.” Milnes says the pace of technological change is both exciting and terrifying for parents. “Today’s children really are digital natives and soon even the most technologically-savvy parents will be left behind. I saw my 10-yearold coaxing her 84 year-old granddad to use an iPad for Google searches the other day which

was fantastic.” She says she loves the way this generation of kids have no perceived limits on what technology can and can’t do. “The concept of a 3D printer churning out household items from downloadable plans instead of going to the hardware shop really challenges my whole world, but my daughters think it is brilliant and would like one for Christmas!”

The effect on education

Children are becoming more technologicallysavvy, albeit perhaps lacking some awareness of its limitations. But what effect does this greater cyber knowledge have on their teachers? Sir Peter argued that children could require a certain type of teacher in order to cope with these changes. Wright, an education specialist, said that the education system is actively encouraging the use of computers in virtually all of the learning activities in which instant communication is paramount. Yet he says that computers should not be children’s main source of gaining knowledge. “I believe schools need to start thinking seriously about providing a refuge from computers for at least part of the day to allow students to start developing the very skills that this technology seems to be quashing: linear analytical thought, sequential argument, reflection.” He feels that students should be taught verbal and logical skills that require concentration and perseverance in their formative years, to counter-balance learning dominated by visual experience that requires little concentration and no perseverance. Furthermore, both parents and teachers shouldn’t cater solely to their “learning style,” he says, as “It is claimed that we remember up to 90% of not only what we see, but what we say, hear and do.” Wright says parents could encourage their children to listen, read stories to them, tell

Tips for tech-savvy parents • Content filters - either programmes you buy or services from internet service providers - make it harder for kids to access unsuitable content on the internet.

• Limit access to internet in your home. Windows 7 has features that allow you to set up a profile for each member of the house. You can customise the times they can use the net, what sites they can visit, and check who they accept as “friends” on social networking sites. K9 is also a great free internet control programme.

• Don’t have internet-enabled computers in bedrooms, but rather in hightraffic areas of the house. Be aware that phones and games can also hook up to the net. Change the password on your home network or wireless hub to limit who can log on.

• Overcome your technophobia and join your kids online! Many parents stories about themselves as children, and get them to listen to their grandparents about their days growing up. “Encourage lots of singing with words they can understand. Have a guitar and encourage a singsong at the party. Encourage lots of colour and freehand drawing and doodling, not just on the computer. If they have Lego don’t just design what is on the box but fuel their imagination and then get them to create something and explain what it is.” So there are ways parents can help their

enjoy this extra dimension of contact with their kids through Facebook, etc. Tip: don’t make too many comments on their page. Kids hate the idea that parents are “stalking” them…which, of course, they are. Facebook does provide that extra window into what they and their friends are up to. Enforce the age limit on Facebook, which is 13. Facebook boot around 20,000 underage kids off their site every day, but many still slip through. If you have younger children, join up to www. togetherville.com with them – a safe, fun social networking site for kids and their parents.

• Make phones behave at your place. Good phone manners mean you can’t look at your phone if someone is talking to you, you don’t use it at meals, and it goes off at bed time. Tips provided by John Cowan, creative producer, The Parenting Place children develop resilience to modern technology and to make the most of the advantages it provides. Milnes says the ability to think creatively and develop solutions via modern technology is “going to be increasingly valuable, as will the ability to weigh and judge information. And perhaps knowledge won’t need to be held in our brains anymore, but finding it and using it in new ways will be even more important.”

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How to identify learning disabilities Does your child struggle with completing schoolwork? Does their teacher describe them as lazy, unmotivated or naughty?

s reading out loud worse than eating brussel sprouts in their world? Do writing tasks or simple math problems lead to major meltdowns at homework time? If so, consider the possibility that there is an underlying learning disability. By understanding learning disabilities, you can set your child up for success within the classroom and beyond.

What are learning disabilities?

Learning disabilities are difficulties with learning and processing information. A learning disability does not indicate a child is of low intelligence; however, their academic results may be very low. It is not a motivation issue, although if a child experiences failure continually they may become unmotivated very quickly within the classroom. Children with learning disabilities are certainly not lazy or dumb, but they may have acquired fantastic task-avoidance skills. The most common types of learning disabilities involve challenges with reading, writing, math, reasoning, listening, and speaking.

The important thing to remember is that most children with learning disabilities are intelligent and capable of learning if the environment and teaching methods are changed. Can children with learning disabilities succeed? When parents first hear that their child has a learning disability, they are often both relieved and scared: relieved to have an answer and

scared about what the future might hold for their child. The important thing to remember is that most children with learning disabilities are intelligent and capable of learning if the environment and teaching methods are changed. These children learn differently and need to be taught in ways that are tailored to meet their needs. By becoming informed about learning disabilities in general, and your child’s learning difficulties in particular, you can help pave the way for academic success and social-emotional wellbeing.

What can I do if I think my child has a learning disability?

Investigate it further. Learning disabilities generally do not improve if left alone, and research indicates that early intervention can be very successful. If a child has reached high school before their learning disability is identified they have often experienced a lonely and academic struggle.

How are learning disabilities identified?

It’s not always easy to identify learning disabilities as they are highly variable and individual. No set of single identifiers exists; however, some common characteristics are evident. Your child might present with some or all of these, and therefore further investigation by a suitably qualified person is suggested. All children are invigorating and exhausting, but these traits are often magnified in children with a learning disability. Both parent and child can experience great frustration. Celebrate what your child can do and have high expectations. A little boy who once disliked school stated so aptly “I was, on the whole, considerably discouraged by my school days. It was not pleasant to feel oneself so completely outclassed and left behind at the beginning of the race.” He became the British Prime Minister Winston Churchill! By Rose Blackett Rose Blackett is the president of NZAGC, SENG Board of Directors, MoE advisory board.

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Signs and symptoms of learning disabilities:  Trouble learning the alphabet, numbers, colours, shapes, days of the week.  Difficulty following directions or learning routines.  Trouble with buttons, zips, clothes fastenings, learning to tie shoes.  Trouble learning and remembering the connection between letters and sounds.  Fidgety, sometimes disruptive.  Unable to blend sounds to make words.  Trouble remembering the sounds that letters make or hearing slight differences between words.  Confuses basic words when reading.  Consistently misspells common words and makes frequent reading errors.  Trouble learning and retaining basic math concepts.  Difficulty telling time and remembering number sequences.  Slow to learn and demonstrate new skills.  Inconsistent learning - may be able to demonstrate a skill one day but not on another.  Variable concentration levels.  Difficulty with reading comprehension or math skills.

 Often skilled at task avoidance, often loses personal belongings.

 May become disruptive and present as a behaviour challenge.

 Spells the same word differently in a single document.

 Poor organisational skills i.e. bedroom, homework, desk is messy and disorganised.  Poor handwriting.  Makes many mistakes when reading aloud, and repeats and pauses often.  Messy handwriting or holds a pencil awkwardly.  Struggles to express ideas in writing – huge gap between oral language ability and written output.  Mispronounces words or uses a wrong word that sounds similar.  Confuses math symbols and misreads numbers.  May not be able to retell a story in order i.e. what happened first, second, third.  Great difficulty starting tasks, and often unsure of next step to reach task completion.

baby & toddler

What cardboard boxes can teach kids more powerful and deliberate stimulation This need for “denning” continues throughout Like red rubber balls and we traditionally think of when we talk about childhood (and throughout life) because in teddy bears, broccoli refusals, many ways, it’s a subconscious return to the “sensory play.” This relief from the sensory world may comfort of the womb. skipping rope, sticky fingers, explain, in part, why kids find the confines of a Empowerment boo boo kisses, bath time cardboard box so appealing. And of course, its Imagine what it’s like to always be the smallest very neutrality is the blank-slate upon which pouts, and nighty-night tuck- person in a room. Everything is sized for big children so easily imprint their imaginations. people. In small spaces, kids feel big. ins, cardboard boxes are As well, the light-weight construction of a Imagination essential for little kids. And cardboard box enables young children to move Put simply, a cardboard box can become and manipulate an object that is bigger than they the child wants it to be. Creating the granddaddy of them all is are. In other words, cardboard yields to their will. anything something new from something that exists the refrigerator box. teaches a child that his view is important and Control So, why are cardboard boxes great for kids?

Spatial awareness

The first thing little kids do when confronted with a cardboard box is try to get in it. Cute as this is, there’s actually an important reason why they do this. It’s called spatial awareness. Preschoolers spend a good deal of time getting to know their own bodies, and with that comes the necessary question “how big am I?” But they’re growing, so the answer to that question keeps changing. That’s why kids are constantly testing their own size by crawling in, through, around, over and under things. Cardboard boxes are often the perfect size for this kind of spatial exploration.

Comfort and security

Right from the start, children are soothed by a sense of being bundled up or embraced.

Cardboard boxes make ideal hiding places, and kids love to hide. Now, while there is no research to back this up, it seems obvious to educators that the hiding game may well be the first experience a child has with knowing something adults don’t know.

Asensory play

“Asensory” experiences play an important role in sensory development and the humble cardboard box is a great example of an asensory environment. The brown colour suggests nothing in particular. The smooth sides infer little. The cube structure defines empty space. The subtle smell lacks distraction. The sound of the cardboard folding is muted and music-less. This very lack of sensory input (or perhaps, more accurately said, the subtle nature of the sensory inputs) is an essential contrast to the

A matter of instinct A

djusting to reduced sleep is one of the most difficult aspects of becoming a parent. The existence of such an array of baby sleep-related paraphernalia suggests that it’s a problem for many parents. Maybe, however, it’s our expectations, rather than the baby’s, that need adjusting. Babies have only one form of communication; crying. A focus on trying to decipher what your child wants can detract from responding to their needfulness. Instead of feeling overwhelmed by whether to do the “cry-it-out” or attachment parenting approach, try something different. When your baby cries, take a breath, listen to your instinctive and non-conditioned response and go with that. Nearly always your instinct will lead you to comfort and be with your baby, which is all that babies want and need.

Five tips for happier parenting: 1. When your baby cries, follow your instincts. 2. Put yourself in your baby’s place. If you could

only make crying noises to get attention, would you rather have a hug or be left alone? 3. Learning to accept and acknowledge your shadow side that at times gets angry or frustrated means it’ll be much easier to go back to your more nurturing self. 4. We can never give too much love. Babies aren’t manipulative. 5. Self-settling will happen to every child in their own time. It might take a few years, so relax about it. It’s not the badge of good parenting. By Dr. Victoria Metcalf Victoria is a mum of a very busy, attached preschooler and a lecturer in biology and genetics. She wrote this perspective as an alternative to an article Family Times ran in its autumn edition about self-settling babies.

that anything is possible.

By Gill Connell from Moving Smart Adapted from Moving Smart Blog http:// movingsmartblog.blogspot.co.nz To find out about the many courses Gill Connell and the Moving Smart team run visit www. movingsmart.co.nz/home/pre-schools/workshopschedule-2/

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LA LECHE LEAGUE OFFERS: • Mother-to-mother support • Telephone help • Trained breastfeeding counsellors • Regular meetings • Books and leaflets for sale • Lending libraries

the theme for this year’s Big Latch On is “Breastfeeding Support: Close to Mothers”, which highlights the importance of support in the home and in the community for breastfeeding women. Partners, whanau, friends, other mothers, lactation consultants and other professionals can all play a role in assisting breastfeeding, and this year’s theme recognises their contribution. The Big Latch On 2013 will take place at 10:30am on Friday 2 August. If you would like to coordinate an event in your area, registrations are now open online at www. womens-health.org.nz. Events can be as small as two people, or as large as a whole community. If event coordination isn’t your thing, you can still attend – look for registered venues in your area through the link above. For more information, email Lee at breastfeeding@womens-health.org.nz.

Sibling mayhem Let’s start by getting rid of the You see unacceptable behaviour words “sibling rivalry.” This Take action. Exile the offender to their room term implies that the sort of until they are ready to behave in a civilised way. do not need this sort of behaviour in your “stuff” that goes on between You home. siblings has something to do Often, there is one child who sets it up (often with their rivalry for parental with provocative words) so that the other one is always caught in retaliation (often physical). attention, time, goods or Get much smarter at catching the “setterupper.” They are the ones who make sure that services. the peace of your household is destroyed.

ince many parents, who give their children a great deal of attention and are doing their level best to be scrupulously fair, still find themselves dealing with warring siblings, I think we can rule out “rivalry.” I prefer the term “sibling mayhem.” When we have more than one child, there is a certain amount of mayhem that does along with sibling interactions. What is a parent to do? How can we make our homes a pleasant oasis in which everyone feels valued and secure, rather than a war zone? Let’s think about three situations:

Someone comes running to you

Forget “don’t tell tales!” Actually, you do want them to tell you. Firstly, it gives you information about whether you need to intervene or not. If there is no blood or teeth-marks, don’t intervene. Your child has done a very sensible thing and got away from a dangerous situation. Let them tell you their tale of woe, hear them out and soothe them down. The most important thing is that mum or dad “gets it” i.e. understands and is empathetic. Once they have calmed down, they can decide whether to go back or to keep away.

When we have more than one child, there is a certain amount of mayhem that does along with sibling interactions. You hear the situation heating up

We’ve all heard escalating noises that indicate the situation is heating up and stayed away hoping they’d sort themselves out. This is known as the triumph-of-hope over experience. Sooner or later there is a crash or a scream or both – and lots of sorting out to do. Stay alert and get in there as soon as you hear the situation escalating. Hold them both accountable for the discord. Use my wonderful “no-blame” phrase – “This isn’t working.” Split the children up and send them to separate rooms and set a timer for 10 minutes. When the timer goes off, just go to their rooms and say, “Time’s up.” They are free to stay separate or to resume playing together. Once they realise that when they scrap, you will show up immediately none-too-pleased and take action, you can just walk down the

corridor heavy-footed and the odds are that they will have sprung apart by the time you get there. Your children will learn one of two things by using this approach each time they fight: • They will learn not to fight or • They will learn to fight very quietly.

By Diane Levy Diane Levy is a family therapist and well-known public speaker. She is the author of the best seller Of Course I Love You…NOW GO TO YOUR ROOM!, “They Look So Lovely When They’re Asleep,” and “Time-Out for Tots, Teens and Everyone in Between.

We would like to hear from you.... In our upcoming Spring 2013 issue, we will be running a question and answer column with Diane offering her professional wisdom and advice regarding parenting concerns. Get those questions flowing! Please email to admin@familytimes.co.nz.

The four most common causes of bed wetting Bed wetting is not uncommon, and it is a stage in your child’s development that they will outgrow.

Childcare on your terms Bluebells provides quality In Home Education and care in safe and nurturing environments. We oﬀer 20 years of teaching experience to build your childs individual learning programme.

We provide: • Tailored programme to suit each childs individual requirements • Daily documentation of your childs achievements • One on one quality education and nurturing • Healthy, safe and homely environment • Weekly playgroups • Music sessions weekly • Kelly Sports Sporty Shorty pre-school programme during term time • Monthly outings • WINZ subsidy available making it very aﬀordable • ECE 20 hour subsidy for children 3 years and over

Call us today to secure your childs enrolment

09 215 8335 / 021 338 639

Stephanie@bluebells.co.nz / www.bluebells.co.nz 10

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o one knows the exact causes of bed wetting, but there are various factors which can play a central role. Children can experience two stages of nocturnal enuresis, namely primary and secondary. Both these stages have different causes and treatments.

Four most common bed wetting causes 1. Small bladder – your child’s bladder may 2. 3.

not have developed enough to hold urine for the entire night. Inability to recognise full bladder signals – your child does not wake up when their bladder is full. Hormone imbalance – In some cases kids don’t produce enough anti-diuretic, which is meant to slow night time urine production. Poor daytime habits - Many children habitually ignore the urge to urinate and put off urinating as long as they possibly can.

Genetics?

Bed wetting does tend to run in families: many children who wet the bed are highly likely to have either one or both of their parents who did too. In this case, children will usually stop bed wetting at roughly the same ages as the parent/s did.

The not so common causes

Secondary nocturnal enuresis usually occurs later in life and can be a sign of underlying medical or emotional problems. Children who experience secondary bed wetting will more

likely have other symptoms, such as daytime wetting. A few medical reasons why secondary bed wetting may be prevalent are: • Urinary tract infection – can make it difficult to control urination. Signs may include daytime accidents, bed-wetting, frequent urge to urinate, bloody urine or pain during urination. • Sleep apnoea – a condition where breathing is interrupted during sleep – usually because of inflamed or enlarged tonsils. • Diabetes – for someone who usually has dry nights, bed wetting may be a sign of diabetes. • Chronic constipation – lack of regular bowel movements. • Stress • Structural problems in the urinary tract or nervous system In secondary nocturnal enuresis cases, parents should seek medical advice and treatment options.

Fit Families

Your child, their game Armed with oranges, water bottles and folding chairs, parents around the country look forward to watching their kids play organised sport. But is it right for your child?

he involvement of children in organised sports is a relatively recent phenomenon. In the early 20th century, physical activity was largely made up of free play and games. This was generally spontaneous, unstructured, and without adult involvement. During the latter part of the 20th century however, free play or unstructured games primarily gave way to organised sport. Often when you see children playing outdoors they wear uniforms and follow the directions of coaches while their parents dutifully watch and cheer. Popular culture is pushing the notion that to succeed at sport, kids need to be in organised sports programmes run by adults at an earlier and earlier age, to the point that early childhood and preschool programmes are now available for many sports.

Which is better – an organised programme or unstructured games/play? Sport NZ advocates for a balanced approach to sport. Kids should have time to just be

kids, as well as take part in organised sports programmes when they show an interest and are ready. Organised sports programmes for children should complement, not replace, the

Organised sports programmes for children should complement, not replace, the regular physical activity that is part of free play, child-organised games, recreational sports, and physical education programmes in schools. regular physical activity that is part of free play, child-organised games, recreational sports, and physical education programmes in schools. Generally, children under seven-years-old should focus on skill development through games and play rather than competitive sport. Activities should be fun, allowing children to explore what they can do. Development and enjoyment is fostered in an environment that is caring, safe, and supportive. Most children will be at a “stage of readiness” to move into entry level sport activities by the age of 12 years. Continued development is best achieved through a combination of unstructured play in a safe and challenging environment, and quality instruction from knowledgeable teachers, leaders and coaches. Development of skills and positive attitudes

in children is more important than winning every week: whilst competition is important, the focus should be on playing, learning and striving for success. Children should experience a wide range of sport activities rather than focusing solely on one activity, as skills need to be developed in a wide range of environments. Although many children at this age have developed a preference for one sport or another, for full athletic development they need to engage in a broad range of activities, playing at least two to three different sports. It is adults (particularly parents) who often

have responsibility for leading, managing or supporting the early experiences of children in organised sport. Positive parental engagement has been shown to have a positive effect on these experiences and kids love it when you get involved. The rule of thumb for parents however is - in whatever capacity you find yourself and when making decisions for/with your child - always remember that while it is your child, it’s their game. Article provided by Sport New Zealand (Sport NZ)

acting out in this way. Doing this without judging them is the best way to find out how to make it stop. Talk – let the child know that their behaviour is hurting someone else and there are much better ways to deal with their feelings. Wait – let the information you have given the child sink in. They may think about their

bullying in a new light and see why it is so unacceptable. 4. Plan – help the child to identify bullying behaviours and stop them. 5. Act – if the bullying continues, let a figure of authority know and get as much help as possible. Written by DryNites New Zealand

What is bullying? If you suspect that bullying is taking place, it probably is. What do bullies do?

Bullies generally choose targets who are smaller and younger than they are. In many cases, bullying is the result of insecurity because it’s a way to vent frustration and bring another child, who may be perceived as receiving more attention, down.

Reactions to bullying

Because bullying can take many forms, it can make the bully’s target feel a number of emotions and react in different ways. If you are concerned that you child is the target of bullying, look for: • Frequent changes in mood • Poor posture • Noticeably increased or decreased appetite • Anti-social behaviour such as swearing or hitting out at others • Signs of anxiety in public • Academic underachievement

How to deal with bullying

If your child, or a child you know, is being bullied there are some important steps to take. 1. Listen – children who have been bullied are often hesitant to speak up, so when they decide to tell you about it listen in silence. 2. Talk – verbal support, such as letting a child know that bullying is not their fault and that you know how to put a stop to it is invaluable. 3. Wait – giving a child time to process everything is important. Don’t take action without them agreeing as in some situations this can make the bullying worse. 4. Plan – make strategies for avoiding certain situations or facing them head on. 5. Act – inform authority figures like teachers about what is happening, help your child with coping tactics and boost their confidence.

How to deal with a bully

1. Listen – try to find out why the child is

2. 3.

Manuka Doctor supports Water Babies at Northern Arena

Northern Arena, in conjunction with Manuka Doctor, is offering a term of free swimming lessons to more than 1200 infants and toddlers. Manuka Doctor funded the initiative with Northern Arena in 2012, allowing 904 babies a free term of swimming at Northern Arena Learn to Swim School with the aim of being proactive in the community and providing a positive family experience in a safe environment. The initiative has and will help

educate parents and teach infants the skills to save themselves and potentially other lives in the future. Northern Arena has announced that Manuka Doctor has increased its funding in 2013 to $125,000, which will provide more than 1200 infant and toddlers under the age of three with a term of free swimming lessons. Register your interest now at www. northernarena.co.nz for your opportunity for a term of free babies’ swimming lessons.

FREE

Babies Swimming

LESSONS

Register your interest now at www.northernarena.co.nz Thanks to Manuka Doctor we have $125,000 of swimming lessons for under 3’s to give away!

call: 09 421 9700 find: 8 Polarity Rise, Silverdale

www.familytimes.co.nz

surf: www.northernarena.co.nz email: info@northernarena.co.nz

Great giveaways for winter…....

In this issue Lee Keenan visits Wainui Primary School to ask kids about the impact modern technology has on today’s children.

Reuben Kirkwood, age 10

We use the computer at school for about an hour a day and I use it for about the same at home. I also use my iPod to play games. I have to check with my parents before I download anything. At school we’re told by our teachers which sites we can go to and they can always go back and check. I think computers are good for the games.

It’s easy to win fantastic prizes with Family Times. Just fill in the entry form and post it to us by the due date, or enter online at www.familytimes.co.nz. This month we have a fantastic line up of prizes with more great giveaways… Good luck! Check out last issue’s lucky winners online.

Despicable Me 2 Jackson Robinson, age 10

In 2010 Universal Pictures and Illumination Entertainment introduced us to super-villain Gru, his evil sidekick, Dr Nefario, the unpredictably hilarious Minions and the adorable orphans, Margo, Agnes and Edith, to whom he became father. In 2013 prepare yourself for more Minion madness with the return of these beloved characters in the all-new comedy adventure Despicable Me 2 in which Gru, with the assistance of secret agent Lucy Wilde (Kristen Wiig), is recruited by the Anti-Villain League to help deal with a powerful new super criminal who threatens the stability of the world as we know it.In cinemas 4 July. We have 8 x beach towels, 8 x kids (medium) t-shirts, 8 x double passes to give away. This competition ends July 10.

WIN!

Kiwiana Cupcakes, Cake Pops and Whoopie Pies by Kirsten Day

Jaiden Bracken, age 10

The longer you go, the more you’ll glow with this super-cool Twister Rave Skip-It game! Put the hoop on one leg and swing the Skip-It while you hop over it. The colours glow as you skip, and when all four colours glow, you’ve made it! With four colours and more than 20 light patterns, you can light it up to level up with Twister Rave Skip-It! RRP $34.99. We have 3 to give away.

, ,WIN N I W

Caitlin Kay, aged 10

If the websites are bad our teachers let us know. We aren’t allowed to go on YouTube unless we have permission. I don’t like the idea of Facebook because people can hack your site but I do like computers because they are good for helping with homework, communication and games. Our computer at home is in the office and I have to get the password from my Mum.

These sch the whole of movies an unlikel centuries ParaNorm favourite Most Wan adventure Easter Bu Guardians the specta you’ve see Away - ou to giveaw

We have 4 to give away.

WIN!

passes

Learn how you can help protect the forest these July holidays (13-28 July), just like the “leafmen” from Epic, the movie. Go on your own epic adventure by following the leaf trails around the Zoo to discover creatures that live in the forest. You can do fun activities along the trail, in the epic activity centre or listen to fun stories told each day at 11am. Jump, balance, crawl and weave your way through, around and over obstacles daily at 10am, noon or 2pm. Normal zoo admission prices apply. For full details, visit www.aucklandzoo.co.nz We have 5 family passes to give away.

Ryan B

Paran Madag Rise o Guard Cirque

Grit Scooters offer a range of complete Grit Scooters, as well as parts and accessories that can be mixed and matched with other scooter brands on the market. Using only the highest grades of raw materials, Grit Scooters design and manufacturing is constantly improving to ensure that Grit products stay at the forefront of extreme scootering. Visit www.gritscooters.co.nz for a list of retailers near you! The Grit Extremist is the perfect quality entry level scooter incorporating the exclusive Grit deck and high Tensile T bars. Enter now for your chance to win a Grit Extremist!

WIN, WIN, Auckland Zoo family

www.familytimes.co.nz

We get into trouble with our teachers if we are on websites we aren’t supposed to be and we can be banned. I use the computers at school for about an hour a day for school work and maybe the same at home for homework and some games. They’re good because they’re portable, but can be bad if they get a virus. I think it would be good to have a phone at maybe 11 so you can call home if you need to.

Grit Extremist Scooter

WIN

Kiwiana Cupcakes offers more than 30 recipes for cupcakes, cake pops and whoopie pies, which includes everything from a chocolate Kiwifruit cupcake to sheep in the paddock cake pops. Alongside these fabulous never-fail recipes are Kirsten’s expert tips and hints, advice on Kiwiana styling and variations on design. Kirsten Day manages Milly’s Kitchen (voted Best Homeware Store 2011 by Metro magazine), and runs cake and cupcake decorating classes all over the country. Published by HarperCollins, www.harpercollins.co.nz, in May 2013, RRP $39.99. We have 3 of these to give away.

Three Create www.f on 28 J

I don’t have an iPod or phone but I think it would be okay at about aged 11. I use the internet at school and home. Computers are good for games and with doing my homework. Our computer at home is in the kitchen and mum can see what I’m doing. They can be bad if you go onto bad websites. If I get on the wrong website I get off straight away.

Twister Rave Skip-It

WIN, WIN,

What love t you, y featu like? amaz

WIN,WIN,

WIN

Lone Ranger prize pack

The Lone Ranger is a thrilling adventure infused with action and humour, in which the famed masked hero is brought to life through new eyes. Native American warrior Tonto (Johnny Depp) recounts the untold tales that transformed John Reid (Armie Hammer), a man of the law, into a legend of justice—taking the audience on a runaway train of epic surprises and humorous friction as the two unlikely heroes must learn to work together and fight against greed and corruption. In cinemas 4 July. We have 5 prize packs, each consisting of: a feather pen, a notebook, a T-shirt and a double in-season pass to the movie! This competition ends 10 July.

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Monsters University prize packs

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What would your dream slippers look like? We’d love to see a drawing of them; they could be for you, your mum, your dad or anyone you like. What features would they have? What would they look like? Send us your picture and be in to win an amazing $50 prize pack from Crayola! Three entry age groups: preschool (age 1-4), 5-8, 9-12. Create your design on an A5 sheet or download the template and entry form from www.familytimes.co.nz. Post in to PO Box 36 004, Christchurch 8146. Entries close on 28 July 2013.

Congratulations to our dream job design competition winners from our last issue. They are:

anned. y for work table, good you

Asheika Brasell-Jagger (bug collector) – age 4

Ryan Billington (cyber rats shop) – age 7

Paranorman; Madagascar 3; Rise of the Guardians, Cirque Du Soleil

Jonathon Tokios (boat architect) – age 11

WIN,WIN,

WIN!

, ,WIN N I W

WIN

This ultimate robot prize pack includes: Transformers Prime Commander and Deluxe scale, 2 x Bot Shots Brawlers packs, a KRE-O Microchanger Combiner and a KRE-O figure set. They include all your favourite characters packed out in “beast mode” including Optimus Prime, Autobot and Decepticon as well as new weapons and accessories to take on the vicious villain Predaking. It’s time to “beast up” your collection. Total value RRP $139.99. We have 3 to give away.

Queen Alice’s Palaces by Juliette MacIver Queen Alice has the best palace in the land. But when cunning Sir Hugh plots to take one of Alice’s palaces (by means of a military coup!), will she be able to outwit him? A brilliantly funny rhyming text with gorgeous illustrations for ages three plus. Queen Alice’s Palaces is by Wellington author Juliette MacIver, who is also the author of Marmaduke Duck and The Marmalade Jam which was shortlisted for the NZ Post Children’s Book Awards. Visit www.harpercollins.co.nz. We have 5 copies to give away.

Just tick the things you want to win WINTER 2013

 Despicable Me 2  Twister Rave Skip-It  Kiwiana Cupcakes, Cake Pops and

 Get the latest from Transformers

   



  Henry’s Map by David Elliot

WIN, WIN,

Henry is a very particular sort of pig, who believes there’s ‘a place for everything and everything in its place’. But when he looks out the window, he’s troubled. The farm is a mess! So he decides to draw a map to show everyone exactly where they belong. He takes a journey through the farm with his friends as he draws the map: sheep in the woolshed; chickens in the coop; horse in the stable. Award-winning writer and illustrator David Elliot crafts a lovely comic ending which children will work out long before Henry does. http://www.randomhouse.co.nz/ We have ten of these to giveaway.

These school holidays keep the whole family entertained with a selection of movies new to Blu-ray™ and DVD. Follow an unlikely boy hero who saves his town from a centuries old curse in the animated adventure ParaNorman - out now. Catch up with your favourite zoo foursome in Madagascar 3 Europe’s Most Wanted - available now. Join an epic adventure featuring Santa, the Tooth Fairy and Easter Bunny in the animated fantasy Rise of the Guardians - available from 3 July. Get swept up in the spectacular movie adventure unlike anything you’ve seen before Cirque Du Soleil: Worlds Away - out 26 June. We have 3 packs of these to giveaway.

Whoopie Pies by Kirsten Day Auckland Zoo family passes Grit Extremist Scooter Lone Ranger prize pack Paranorman; Madagascar 3; Rise of the Guardians; Cirque Du Soleil Monsters University prize packs

A T-shirt A notebook A slapband A double in-season pass to the movie. Entries close 10th July.

Henry’s Map by David Elliot

Get the latest from Transformers Beast Hunters

e ich the hrough onto es that er), a man king the rprises ely nd fight as 4 July. ting of: t and a e! This

DISNEY•PIXAR’s MONSTERS UNIVERSITY (In Disney Digital 3D™) In Cinemas July 11 www.disneymovies.co.nz Mike Wazowski and James P. Sullivan are an inseparable pair, but that wasn’t always the case. From the moment these two mismatched monsters met they couldn’t stand each other. Monsters University unlocks the door to how Mike and Sulley overcame their differences and became the best of friends. We have 5 prize packs to giveaway each consisting of:

Beast Hunters Queen Alice’s Palaces by Juliette MacIver Birthday party voucher for Dialled Indoor Skatepark



Name Address City Phone

To be in the draw to win, enter online at www.familytimes.co.nz or write your name and address on the back of an envelope or postcard and send to: Auckland Competition, PO Box 36 004, Christchurch to reach us by July 28th 2013, unless stated otherwise. Only one entry per household.

Birthday party voucher for Dialled Indoor Skatepark

WIN, WIN,

WIN!

Be the coolest kid on the block and have your next party at Dialled Indoor Skatepark! Family Times has a party voucher to give away that entitles you to a three-hour session for up to 10 kids, table and chairs to set up party and a goodie bag for the birthday child. Dialled Indoor Skatepark caters for skate, scooter and BMX and has professionally built ramps and structures including a foam pit, and also a great onlocation shop. Bring a great attitude, bar ends and helmet (hire gear is available).Visit 36 Parkway Drive, Rosedale, www.dialled.co.nz. www.familytimes.co.nz

cool activities

Calendar of Events minutes! The event also includes markets with Now – 22 July The winter school holidays Maori arts, crafts and clothing. From 9amMatariki Festival – Celebrate the Maori are almost here. It’s time 4pm, The Cloud, Queens Wharf. Visit www. New Year. Auckland comes alive with a series matarikifestival.org.nz. to wrap up warmly and of concerts, family events and traditional celebrations. From art exhibits and kapa haka find some fun things to do. 13-20 July contemporary dance and kite flying, there is Te Ara Rama Matariki – Matariki Light Auckland has a lot of activities to something for everyone to enjoy. Full details for Trail - Experience night time Glen Innes like on offer for families to enjoy. free events at www.matarikifestival.org.nz. you have never seen it before. Take a hikoi Here are some ideas to get along the flax-lined banks of the Omaru River 3-20 July and view light animations and installations you started. Artrageous - This is a great opportunity to see

22 June - 31 August (every Saturday)

an exhibition from some aspiring young student artists that will encourage all to get creative! Visit www.mairangiarts.co.nz.

Pick & Mix - Free performances and workshops for the whole family. See the Royal New Zealand Ballet, Roald Dahl’s Revolting Rhymes, hip hop clowning or an amazing aerial circus. It’s a lolly scramble of theatrical delights! www.the-edge.co.nz/pm.aspx.

6 July and 7 September

Every Saturday Auckland Art Gallery - Create art together in sessions inspired by art in the collection. Drop in and stay as long as you like. No need to book. Great for those age four and up. From 1-3pm, visit www.aucklandartgallery.com.

Now-29 September The Hillary Trail - Pick up the Sir Edmund Hillary Trail which guides you on an interactive tour leading up to the exhibition, The Summit. You’ll find challenges and stories based on Sir Ed’s experiences climbing Mt Everest. Visit www.aucklandmuseum.com.

Auckland Mama Markets - A showcase of top-quality products from mama-owned and local businesses. Enjoy a relaxing and family-friendly morning of great new products, fabulous coffee and fun for the kids. Visit www. aucklandmamamarket.co.nz.

7 July Tartan Day Celebration Tattoo 2013 – Enjoy all things Scottish. Highland dancing, clan stalls and displays, pipe bands and marching teams. Free entry. Visit www. bngcommunitytrust.org.nz.

13 July 2Degrees Kapa Haka Super 12’s – This fastpaced, family-friendly event takes kapa haka to a new level. It’s a fierce competition with 12 teams of 12 performers battling it out for 12

The Voyager New Zealand Maritime Museum presents

Pirates are sailors too

telling the stories of Matariki. Free event, www.matarikifestival.org.nz.

13-28 July Stories and Legends of Auckland Museum - Hear about the myths, stories and legends around the fascinating objects and artefacts that live at Auckland Museum. Monday – Friday, 2pm, free. Visit www.aucklandmuseum.com.

16 and 23 July Out and About Glow Worm Night Walks - Spot eels in the creek, catch sight of frogs and observe glow worms along the way for free. At 8.15pm, Wairere Road car park, Totara Park, Manukau. Bookings chris.earl@ aucklandcouncil.govt.nz.

17 July Out and About Sports Day – Get down to Mansell Field, Onslow Road in Papakura for some free, fun sport activities. There will be qualified coaches leading touch rugby, football and other sports games for all ages and abilities. From 4-5.30pm. To book email chris.earl@ aucklandcouncil.govt.nz.

17 July and 24 July Cornwall Park Gingerbread Fun - Coal Range baking fun. Decorate and bake your own gingerbread treat in a coal range oven. Register on arrival to secure your place for this very popular activity. From 11am-2pm. Ages five and up. Visit www.cornwallpark.co.nz.

21 July Volunteer Planting Day at Shakespear Regional Park – Here’s your chance to give back to one of our beautiful parks. Wear sturdy enclosed shoes, weather-appropriate clothes and bring gloves and a spade if you have them. From 10am-1pm. Free sausage sizzle and drinks. Whangaparaoa Road, Army Bay.

Visit the Variety Book Fair to pick up a great old-new read.

25-28 July Variety – The Children’s Monster Book Fair – Here’s your chance to get new books, DVDs and games, and of course to support Variety’s literacy and communication programmes. For location and time details visit www.variety.org.nz.

28 July Collectors’ Toy and Model Fair – This is an event for all lovers of toys and models with items to view and buy. Mount Eden War Memorial Hall, 487 Dominion Road from 10am1pm. Adults $6 and children free.

11, 18 and 25 August and 1 September Cornwall Park Daffodil Sundays – Celebrate the coming of spring! Twin Oak Drive will be closed to vehicles from 1-3pm so families can stroll freely and view the sights. Music, fairies and face painting, www.cornwallpark.co.nz.

17 August The Great Living Legends Muck In – Join rugby great Buck Shelford and help plant trees at the Long Bay Regional Park. Register your interest at www.livinglegends.co.nz. Compiled by Lee Keenan

Wor k shops on th e W harf

Join our Pirate Training Academy, learn real seafaring skills! Follow ye trail map and collect the lost scrolls in your Pirate Kit Bag. There be pirate tales to be heard and a boot camp to test ye sea legs!

Holiday Programme Every day from Monday 15 to Sunday 28 July, activities between 9:30am & 3:30pm. Suitable for children aged 4 to 12 years. Auckland Residents:

$5 per child for activities with accompanying adults free.

Visitors to Auckland: Activities included in museum admission.

Bust the boredom these holidays. Get your kids active with fun, FREE workshops in Wynyard Quarter! Free drop-in sessions between 11am-2pm. For a full workshop timetable check out our website today.

www.wynyard-quarter.co.nz/workshops 14

www.familytimes.co.nz

cool activities

Entertainment Whilst it might be cold outside, there are plenty of indoor attractions open to keep your children entertained these holidays. Here’s a few to choose from.  Northern Arena Learn to swim at Northern Arena’s, Silverdale, intensive learn-to-swim holiday programme. Open for bookings on 09-421-9700 or visit www.northernarena.co.nz for more details.

 Holiday fun at MOTAT! Experience an exciting explosion of sound with Sound FX at MOTAT these school holidays. Enjoy learning about the role sound plays in our lives through a range of interactive activities. From 13–28 July.

 Sky Tower

Check out the view from Auckland’s Sky Tower. outdoor and indoor facility for children eight years and under. The best fun in New Zealand for everyone! www.rainbowsend.co.nz

Experience the amazing views from New Zealand’s tallest man made structure. Ride the glass elevator to discover something truly amazing! Visit www.skytower.co.nz.

Holiday specials

 Workshops on The Wharf

Get creative alongside your kids at Botany Town Centre 16-18 July, 11am-3pm. This exciting programme of art and craft activities is designed to keep kids’ minds stimulated and of course to have fun!

Free drop in workshops where kids play and create. Workshops from 11am -2pm and are generally near the play space in Wynyard Quarter. Details at www.wynyard-quarter.co.nz.

 Waiwera Thermal Resort Located only 35 minutes north of Auckland, their natural thermal pools are the perfect place to unwind and relax or to try out the amazing hydro-slides! www.waiwera.co.nz.

 Rainbows End Daily entertainment and world class amusement rides. Check out ‘Kidz Kingdom’ – an all-weather

 Coco Pops activity spot

 Sky Tower These school holidays the Sky Tower is celebrating Hairy Maclary from Donaldson’s Dairy’s birthday. Visit www.skytower.co.nz to find out more.

 Workshops on The Wharf Holiday boredom buster! Free workshops for kids to get creative. Taking place between 11am-2pm at Wynyard Quarter. Check out www.wynyard-quarter.co.nz.

 Aladdin Be enchanted these July school holidays as the Phineas Phrog team present their brand new production. Full of mystery, mischief and magical mayhem, Aladdin will delight young and old. For dates and details www.brucemason. co.nz or phone 09-970-9700. Compiled by Lee Keenan

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 Bubble Dome technology workshops Learn Minecraft, App design, programming and more with Bubble Dome these holidays. For times and venues visit www.bubbledome.co.nz.

Time to nominate outstanding teachers and leaders

Teachers are top-of-the-mind for families as nominations open for the ASG Teaching Awards and Cognition Education Leadership Awards. Boards of Trustees, parent associations, secondary student councils and community organisations can nominate outstanding teachers and leaders who inspire learning in their school community. These awards are an opportunity for education consumers to acknowledge those teachers and leaders whose inspirational approach stimulates student learning and success. “Your nomination demonstrates recognition

The Green Gecko - one of the Auckland Zoo’s creatures that can be discovered living in the forest. www. aucklandzoo.co.nz Photographer: Michelle Whybrow

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of outstanding teachers and leaders at early childhood education centres, primary, intermediate and secondary schools nationwide who provide children with the desire, confidence and enthusiasm to learn and do well,” says Terry O’Connell, chairman of the NEiTA Foundation, which facilitates the awards programme. Nominations are open until 30 September 2013. Nominate online at www.neita.co.nz or download a nomination form. Forms are also available at schools and early childhood education centres nationwide, or through the NEiTA Foundation, phone 09-308 0576 or email mventer@asg.co.nz.

craft

Knit a winter scarf Knitting is a great skill for children to learn. It encourages concentration and hand-eye co-ordination, and with the colder months ahead, it’s a great opportunity to indulge in this timeless craft. Here are some simple instructions to make a winter scarf.

Casting on 1. Placing the first row of stitches on the needle is called “casting on.” Make a slip knot and place on your left hand needle. Take the other needle in your right hand and insert the point through the loop so that it rests under the left hand needle forming a cross. Take the yarn from the ball under and over the point of the right hand needle 2. With the right hand needle pull the yarn

through the slip knot on the left hand needle making a new stitch. Transfer this stitch onto the left hand needle making sure that each loop is facing the same direction.

3. Insert the right hand needle between the two stitches on the left hand needle.

4. Take the yarn under and over the point of

the right hand needle. Draw the yarn through between the first two stitches to make a new stitch, then transfer the new stitch onto the left hand needle. Repeat this until you have the required number of stitches on the needle (note: the slip knot counts as the first stitch).

Knit

5. Hold the needle with the cast on stitches in your left hand. With the yarn at the back of the work, insert the right hand needle from left to right through the front of the first stitch on the left hand needle.

6. Wind the yarn from left to right over the point of the right hand needle. 7. Draw the yarn back through the stitch forming a loop on the right hand needle.

8. Slip the original stitch off the left hand

needle, keeping the new stitch on the right hand needle. Continue to knit into every stitch

to the end of the row. Transfer the needle with the stitches on into your left hand and work the next row.

Casting off 9 & 10. Knit the first two stitches from the left hand needle.

11. Using the tip of the left hand needle, lift the first stitch on the right hand needle over the second stitch and drop it off between the points of the two needles. Knit another stitch from the left needle and lift the first stitch over the second stitch as you did before . Continue across the work until there is only one stitch left on the right hand needle. Cut the yarn and thread through the last stitch. Remove from the needle and pull up firmly to secure.

To knit the scarf: You will need two balls of DK/ 8ply 50g 5.0mm needles Cast on 23 stitches, knit in garter stitch (normal knitting as above) until the two balls are used up, leaving enough yarn to cast off in garter stitch. Instructions provided by Knitworld

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Digital goods: buying something but getting nothing It may seem like an odd concept but it’s one that kids have taken to very easily and will define the generations that grow up in the digital age.

he concept of ownership and access as different values is one that is making a steady inroad into the consciousness of kids today. Most parents and grandparents will by now have come across the idea of the iTunes card and it’s desirability as a gift. However the concept does not stop at the voucher phase; it’s increasingly likely that that $50 card will be spent, and that the consumer whom you gifted it to will get nothing in return. Nothing physical that is. The iTunes model is not one that has a physical footprint: you buy an album or a movie and you download it to your machine. You never get a cover, box or even disc that is associated with it. Instead, your account details are the record of the purchase and you have that movie or album on your account for as long as you have paid for it. That may be as short as renting a movie for a one-time view or as long as owning the material to playback as and when you like, and as often as you like.

The most obvious advantage is that it appeals to an environmentally aware generation; there is no impact on the planet’s ecosystem with discs, paper and plastic.

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There are advantages and disadvantages to this model. The most obvious advantage is that it appeals to an environmentally aware generation; there is no impact on the planet’s ecosystem with discs, paper and plastic. Space is at a premium in most houses, so it also means far less clutter. Finally, digital goods like this are usually non-device specific so if you want to you can access the material via phone, desktop or tablet with ease. The downside is that it can be too easy. When you don’t see what you have it can create a digital hoarder mentality without thought to spending habits. Lost passwords, sharing devices, identity theft and other problems of the digital age are also things to look out for. Beyond the concept of ownership though is purchasing “access.” Services like Spotify change the paradigm from material specific purchases to paying a small monthly fee for accessibility to a vast library of music. This model means you do not own anything, but as long as you are a valid subscriber you get a high quality service. You can download and re-use as often as you like from a library bigger than one person could ever get through in a lifetime. Today’s generation of children and youth understand the concepts very easily because they are driven by convenience, instant delivery and value for money. It may be a bit of a leap for some parents, but the consumer is still getting the same value, just without the hard copy in the hand. By Wayne Webb Wayne Webb is a community services manager for SmallWorlds - an online gaming site that caters to a 13-plus age range - an avid technology fiend and the father of two children who also love “screen things.”

Nutrimetics Restore Intense AntiAgeing Day Crème SPF 15 – RRP $56 Something for you - 95% of women report a reduction in the appearance of pigmentation, based on independent clinical testing for 56 days. Grape seed extract rich in antioxidants helps to protect your skin from premature aging, while SPF 15 sunscreen protects against the ageing effects of UVA and UVB light. Suitable for normal to oily skin types. Visit www.nutrimetics. co.nz. We have 10 of these to give away. Enter online at www.familytimes.co.nz or write your name and address on the back of an envelope or postcard and send to: Nutrimetics Restore Intense Anti-Ageing Day Crème SPF 15, PO Box 36 004, Christchurch, to reach us by 28 July 2013. Check out our website for more fantastic competitions.

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Teach your kids to save money Growing up, my mother and father had a beer bottle that they would put their loose change into.

y parents, my brother and I would lay newspaper on the dining room table once it was full. My brother and I would take turns to empty the contents, then we would all sit around the table and count the money. My parents then put the money into a bank account to be used for holidays. Even today I still save my change; the beer bottle is gone and it is now stored in a plastic bag. When that is full I take it to the bank and deposit it. It soon mounts up! I am now teaching my granddaughter Lucy, who lives with my husband and I, to save money. At the age of seven Lucy started earning her pocket money. My husband and I discussed what her chores should be and they are as follows: • Set the table for breakfast. • Clear the table after breakfast and dinner. • Tidy her room. • Make her bed. • Put her dirty washing in the machine. • Dust the skirting boards every Sunday. • Feed the cats. Recently another granddaughter, 15-year-old Bella, came to live with us. Like Lucy, she gets a weekly allowance that she has to earn. Her jobs include: • Stacking the dishwasher in the evening and at weekends. • Emptying the dishwasher at the weekends. • Vacuuming the house every Sunday. • Unloading the groceries and putting them away. • Looking after Lucy on the occasions that my husband and I want to go out. As Lucy gets older she will get more household

chores to do; therefore she will get more pocket money. I do not believe that money should be handed to children. It is our responsibility to teach them that if they work hard then one reward is money. Life is not a free ride. Lucy was given a money box on one of her birthdays. She is paid every Thursday and her money goes directly into the money box. If she wants something in particular then she has to save up for it. There are so many things from which to choose, which is when our guidance becomes very important. We want to teach her to use her money wisely. Recently she saw

It is our responsibility to teach them (children) that if they work hard then one reward is money. Life is not a free ride. a little kitten that she fell in love with. We discussed it with her and said that she was to pay a certain amount toward the purchase of the kitten. I informed her that the kitten was her responsibility and therefore every month she was to pay me $4 toward her food. When Lucy first came to us I opened a savings account for her. The account at the moment is in my name. Every month I deposit $20 into it. Hopefully when she is finally given the money she will use it wisely. Some schools offer weekly banking to their students. Open an account for your child and encourage them to put some of their pocket money into it. They will get a thrill watching the amount grow weekly. By Sally Kabak Sally Kabak is the author of Raising Grandchildren. Visit www.raisinggrandchildren.net.nz for more information and to view her blog.

Canterbury of New Zealand

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Canterbury of New Zealand has been dressing teams in sportswear for decades, but did you know they also look after the “off-fielders” with their lifestyle range? The latest range includes some awesome stuff for kids and is available in stores now or online at www.canterburyofnz.com. We have 6 Canterbury Clothing T-Shirts from the autumn-winter 2013 range to give away: four girls (size 8, 2x 10, and 12) and two boys (2 x size 12). Enter online at www. familytimes.co.nz or write your name and address on the back of an envelope or postcard and send to: Canterbury of New Zealand, PO Box 36 004, Christchurch, to reach us by 28 July 2013. Check out our website for more fantastic competitions.

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Help is @ hand Miscarriage Support Sometimes you need some Inc. information or an answer to Auckland Have you or someone you know had a a curly question. Why not miscarriage? We can provide support and information. Supportline 09 378 4060 pick up the phone and call www.miscarriagesupport.org.nz (100 pages) the relative support agency? support@miscarriagesupport.org.nz You’ll find professional caring It is the strength of the bond with their baby, not the pregnancy length, people ready to assist you. that determines the intensity of women’s grief.

Ice Skate amongst the buzz of Auckland city

SCHOOL TERM DATES

2013 and 2014 primary and intermediate school term dates Term 3, 2013

Monday 29 July to Friday 27 September

Term 4, 2013

Monday 14 October to no later than Friday 20 December

Term 1, 2014

Between Monday 27 January (at the earliest); and Friday 7 February (at the latest) to Thursday 20 April

Term 2, 2014

Monday 5 May to Friday 4 July

2013 and 2012 secondary and composite school term dates

For full details visit www.the-edge.co.nz Door sales available THE EDGE presents

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28 June to 11 August

Term 3, 2013

Monday 29 July to Friday 27 September

Term 4, 2013

Monday 14 October to Friday 20 December

Term 1, 2014

Between Monday 27 January (at the earliest); and Friday 7 February (at the latest) to Thursday 20 April

Term 2, 2014

Monday 5 May to Friday 4 July

Remaining public holiday 2013 27 October 25 December 26 December

Labour Day Christmas Day Boxing Day

baby & toddler

Conscious parenting Our role as parents is to help our children discover who they are and what fulfils them, so when they’re ready to go it alone, they can navigate their own course in the world.

arenting is one of the hardest jobs you’ll ever do. The only training you get is life itself. There is no right or wrong way to do it, so long as you nurture and nourish them to feel safe, secure and loved for who they are. Each and every one of us is conditioned by our upbringing and life experiences. The information acquired from others – their thoughts and feelings - form the basis of the way we live our lives. We then subconsciously use it to bring up our own children. Conscious parenting is about becoming aware of how much of our conditioned learning we’re still using in our lives. It’s like assessing and updating all our data; emptying the trash and making room for stuff that’s relevant to us now so we can create an environment that will nurture and nourish both the needs of our children and ourselves. It’s an opportunity to review our beliefs, attitudes, the words we use, our tone of voice and the way we interact with our children so we can purposefully show them different

perspectives on life. It’s about walking the talk and showing them ways to be kind, caring and considerate to others, and why trust and honesty are so important to building relationships. It’s about encouraging their curiosity and helping them to find solutions for themselves, and showing them how to take responsibility for their own actions and know how to make amends when things go wrong.

Parenting is one of the hardest jobs you’ll ever do. The only training you get is life itself.

It’s listening, listening and listening some more (even when you think you know what they’re going to say or they’re talking complete drivel!) Let them have their say – show them respect and let them know you value their point of view. It will encourage them to appreciate different perspectives, to speak up for themselves and negotiate. Most importantly, it shows them that you believe in them, which gives them hope and faith in their ability to accomplish anything in life. Don’t compare them with others. It’s not about keeping up with, or doing what others

do or being better than anyone else. It’s about bringing out the best in them. Show them how to create a measure of their own success and ways to manage and achieve the things that matter to them. There’s a myriad of everyday situations you can use to help your child create an understanding of who they are and the world that they want. It’s up to you to consciously become aware of situations in which you can integrate nuggets of

wisdom that will enrich their ability to be the best they can be. They are not children for long, so cherish them and look after yourself along the way – you need to be strong to support them. By Philippa Ross, enthusiologist and energy health consultant Cherish Wellbeing, personal growth and development, www.cherishwellbeing.co.nz

Inspiring fussy eaters T

oddlers like to be independent and let you know what they like and do not like. This is normal. Fussy eating can be worrying for parents but if your child is growing and developing appropriately, they are getting enough food. Keep offering a small amount of the foods they refuse as well as new foods as it may take them time to try them and learn to like them or it may be tried at a later time. Alternatively, give your child some choice, e.g. “Would you like an apple or banana?” or “Would you like Vegemite or jam on your bread?” This often stops the automatic response of “no” and gives them a feeling of control. Your child may prefer to have three meals a day with a small snack between, rather than three bigger meals. Fruit, raw vegetables, crackers, small sandwiches or cheese can be healthy snacks. Involving your child in preparing meals and snacks may increase their interest in eating. Offer your child a variety of healthy foods to

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Blackmores Respra Syrup

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Blackmores comes to parents’ rescue with the introduction of Respra Syrup; a sugar-free formula that can be enjoyed by kids as young as six months. This natural chest tonic contains ivy leaf extract to naturally thin mucus, and to support clear airways and bronchial relaxation. RRP $25.90 (200 mils). Visit www.blackmoresnz.co.nz. We have six of these to giveaway. Enter online at www.familytimes.co.nz or write your name and address on the back of an envelope or postcard and send to: Blackmores Respra Syrup, PO Box 36 004, Christchurch, to reach us by 28 July 2013. Check out our website for more fantastic competitions.

Try not to battle over meal times, or to bribe, force or nag. Making a fuss, threatening (e.g. saying they cannot have dessert unless all their dinner is finished), punishing them or forcing them to eat can make your child even more determined not to eat. Praise for trying is a better plan. Ignore leftover food on their plate and tell them you’re pleased with what has been eaten. Try to have meals when your child is not tired. Many children are tired by the time they have their evening meal and refuse to eat so it may help to offer the evening meal earlier. Offering a variety of healthy foods during the day may help if dinner is refused. Drinking too much milk can reduce how much children eat, so limit it to about 500-600ml a day. Try to sit down to eat with your child for at least one meal a day. Children like to copy their parents and may eat better and try different foods if you eat with them. Information provided by Plunket

Winter wellness – how not to over-eat in the chilly season The lure of the fridge late at night can result in even the most health-conscious person’s downfall. So why is that despite our good intentions, we demolish a block of chocolate after swearing we’d only have two pieces?

he lure to comfort eat, or to over-eat, may become even greater as the weather begins to get colder. The days become darker and shorter and it seems what you’re having for dinner becomes all the more important. So how can you avoid falling into an over-eating trap this winter?

If you were truly eating in order to nourish your body, there would be a point you would feel comfortable and nourished. “Once I start I cannot stop” is a phrase I have heard countless times. This wording gives you a clue. If you were truly eating in order to nourish your body, there would be a point you would feel comfortable and nourished. Many people eat to find what I call “soul food.” It’s actually not about the food at all. For some, food is used to replace a feeling in their lives. Food is reliable,

consistent and you know it will taste a particular way. There are not many things in life that do that. Eating for comfort or eating to feel lit up or happy are common scenarios and may be one way you have learnt to cope. To shift your focus away from eating to fill your soul, bring more of the things that truly nourish your soul into your life. Read more often, dance, sing, move, or watch your children sleep and soak up how truly precious they are. Food can never replace the role of soul food in your life. Nor can it make the sun shine. It is no secret that, at times, we may serve ourselves and our family too much total food. The tendency to serve big portions seems to increase as we introduce more hearty fare to our diets. Your stomach is roughly the size of your closed fist and so this provides a good indication for portion sizes of concentrated foods such as carbohydrates and protein. The majority of your family’s plate should be water-based vegetables. There are many ways of transitioning to smaller portion sizes; using smaller plates is a great way of making the meal appear larger than it is. Keeping your nutritional status maintained is an essential component in mounting you and your family’s best defence to winter ailments. In today’s time-poor world, incorporating easy ways of increasing the nutrient density of your diet is a must. One of the obvious winter favourites is soup. Soup makes a delicious lunch or a convenient and nourishing snack. Green soups, fragrant Asian-style broths, classic vegetable soup and of course chicken soup are all great options, but one way to supercharge them is to use a bone broth as

GO Healthy GO Allergy Support Skip into a sneeze-free spring this year with GO Healthy GO Allergy Support; a comprehensive formula that’s packed with allergen-busting ingredients to help clear respiratory passages. This enhanced natural brew of key ingredients includes horseradish, garlic, fenugreek and quercetin at triple strength levels, helping to clear the airways so you can smell those roses! RRP: $27.90 (30 capsules) $43.90 (60 capsules). visit www.gohealthynz. co.nz. We have 6 of these to give away. Enter online at www.familytimes.co.nz or write your name and address on the back of an envelope or postcard and send to: GO Healthy GO Allergy Support, PO Box 36 004, Christchurch, to reach us by 28 July 2013. Check out our website for more fantastic competitions.

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the base or a good quality stock. Kids can help with the cooking! It is also vital that you and your family continue to move. A winter walk even at night, rugged up with a friend can be wonderfully rejuvenating. If the weather doesn’t permit any sort of outdoor activity it might seem rather 1980s, but set aside some time to watch an exercise DVD, stretch or practice simple yoga poses in your home. Or commit to an exercise class preferably breath-focused to keep your body and mind occupied. Try a restorative or warm yoga class. The energy and optimism you

Caring for New Zealand’s kids

One of the best ways to look after New Zealand’s future is to look after our kids. That’s why Fonterra, together with its 10,500 Fonterra farmers, offer two great programmes to New Zealand’s schools. The Fonterra Milk for Schools programme gives kids a boost from the goodness of milk with calcium for healthy teeth and bones and protein to build muscle for their growing bodies. By the end of term one 2014, schools in New Zealand with children in years 1 - 6 will be able to provide free milk to those kids every school day. Schools will also receive free fridges to keep the milk cold and free recycling services, as part of the programme. Many schools run breakfast clubs to provide nourishment to the kids that need it most 20

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create from regular movement can help you remain calm, clear and energised in everything you do. Make choices that will nourish your body and your soul this winter. Don’t let the season become an excuse to overeat. Instead, use it as a time to get to the heart of the matter, truly addressing why you may consistently overeat or make poor quality food choices. Be aware of how you speak to yourself and be sure to treat yourself with the care you deserve. By Dr Libby Weaver. To read more visit www. drlibby.com

before the school day starts. Fonterra’s existing KickStart Breakfast programme is in its fifth year and provides a breakfast of Anchor milk and Sanitarium WeetBix two days a week to children in more than 570 school communities around New Zealand. Recently the government announced its partnership with Fonterra to extend the programme to five mornings per week. These two programmes work together to help care for New Zealand’s kids and are just two of the ways Fonterra works within local communities. For more information on either programme visit www.fonterramilkforschools.com or www.kickstartbreakfast.co.nz.

Become a Kiwi Ranger Ever felt the soft spring of forest moss with your toes, tasted a drop of pure honey dew on the tip of your tongue or sat with closed eyes in the bush and really listened to all the bird sounds you can hear?

hese are some of the activities that children of all ages get to do through the Kiwi Ranger programme, now offered at 10 South Island sites and one in the North Island. Kiwi Ranger was developed by Mick Abbott and Carli Richter of Shades of Green Inc, which together with DOC is creating a nationwide network of Kiwi Ranger sites. Kiwi Ranger is easy to do and in most cases free. You pick a booklet and choose which activities to do. Completion of the tasks earns you a badge – unique to each site – and the title of “Kiwi Ranger.” The programme is aimed at kids from three upwards with older children challenged to do more activities to earn their badge. The activities get children to use all their senses to investigate the special features of a place—the native plants and animals, its unique geography, relics of human history and how it’s being conserved today. Many also call for a bit of detective work and imagination. Budding Kiwi Rangers are also encouraged to think about something they’d like to do when they get home that’s good for the environment and to record this in their booklet. The Kiwi Ranger programme fits nicely with DOC’s vision to create “one million conservation kids.” DOC community engagement specialist and mother of two, Sarah Mankelow, says the beauty of Kiwi Ranger is the way it engages families to work together. “The booklets are designed to be self-directed

so parents or caregivers can pick one up and off they go. “Parents have an important role as first teachers, and Kiwi Ranger gives children and parents an opportunity to learn alongside each other.” With 86% of New Zealanders living in towns and cities it is no surprise that children are increasingly disconnected from the natural world. Yet, research shows that experiences with nature as a child are critical to influencing attitudes and behaviours towards the environment. Kiwi Ranger is one way of getting kids to reconnect with nature and to develop a sense of wonder and respect. By developing a network of Kiwi Ranger places around the country, DOC hopes to encourage families to go to new places and build on their experiences, as well as collect the badges.

Kiwi Ranger – Tiritiri Matangi Travel across the waters of the Hauraki Gulf to the wildlife sanctuary of Tiritiri Matangi and the most recent Kiwi Ranger site. Here you can learn how to do your bit to protect this “treasure island”, tune into the diverse birdlife including rarities like hihi or stitchbird and kokako, and talk to the guides and volunteers about how they helped restore the island and why. Launched in June, this is the first Kiwi Ranger site in the North Island. Get your booklet from guides on board the 360 Discovery ferry or at the island visitor centre. A gold coin donation to the Supporters of Tiritiri Matangi group is appreciated. Look out for new Kiwi Ranger sites in Whakatane/Ohope and Te Urewera National Park later this year. For a list of Kiwi Ranger sites visit: www. kiwiranger.org.nz and www.doc.govt.nz/ kiwiranger.

Mainland cheese snacking vouchers Individually wrapped for convenience, Mainland’s Natural Cheese Sticks and Natural Cheese & Crackers bring the flavour and goodness of your favourite cheese while you’re out and about. They’re the perfect lunchbox inclusion or afternoon snack. We have 50 Mainland cheese snacking vouchers to giveaway. Enter online at www.familytimes.co.nz or write your name and address on the back of an envelope or postcard and send to: Mainland cheese snacking vouchers, PO Box 36 004, Christchurch, to reach us by 28 July 2013. Check out our website for more fantastic competitions.

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Household chores for pre-teens and teens at home Household chores are prob- 3. Keep calm. Don’t get wound up just your teen hasn’t vacuumed by 6pm ably one of the most debated because on their “chores day.” Some teens are great household issues. As your with their time management and are probably planning to do this before midnight strikes. kids grow up from preteens However, if from experience you know that into teenagers, a lot of conchores may be avoided by your teen, give them a gentle reminder. If you want to avoid conflict flict may arise from misunas much possible, perhaps on your chores derstandings about what the chart, also give a time when the chores must responsibilities at home are. be done, or at least the time they must be done

eens are the masters of loopholes, so it’s very important to state your rules clearly as soon as you can – train them as preteens before those teen years kick in. So here are some tips to help you out:

1. Give them the rules. Spell them out and write them down. Make a chart that you put up on the fridge, or somewhere in a visible place in the house. Just like a well-organised flat, give everyone responsibilities they can stick to and execute to their abilities. It’s also good because when something isn’t done, you can refer back to this chart. 2. Communicate the rules. Make sure the rules

are clear. If the task is to do the dishes, spell out that the task also involves, for example, not only stacking the dishwasher, but also unloading it. Again, if you don’t make the rules clear, it’s easy for them to stray away from responsibility. 21

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ing the mortgage or rent on your home, and, it should be the teen’s responsibility to help out as much as they can. But make sure that they see that you’re doing something as well so they don’t feel you’re purely taking advantage. About Eva-Maria Twenty-one-year-old bestselling author of the book You Shut Up!, international speaker and certified coach Eva-Maria is living her dream: she is on a mission to help improve 10,000,000 relationships between adults and teenagers around the world. Join Eva-Maria on her journey to bridge the gap of misunderstanding between teenagers and adults around the globe! www.eva-maria.co.nz

by. Again, you’ll see here my theme of enforcing strict, exact rules that avoid confusion.

4. Have clear consequences. What will it mean if the chores are not done on time? Perhaps this is something you must sit down and discuss with your teen when you’re making the chores chart. The consequence must be something that will motivate them to do the chores. If taking their phone away for two hours is what you see as a consequence and you are the one to suggest it, your teen will quickly start weighing up whether it’s worth it to do the chores, and if they decide that having their phone taken away is not that big-of-a-deal, you may find lots of chores not getting done. So talk the consequences over with them, and make them substantial. 5. Lead by example. Everyone has a part to

play. The beauty of the chores chart is that you can assign tasks to everyone. It does not mean

...

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you must do an equal amount of chores as your teen; in fact, I advise you do the minimal amount because, after all, you are the one pay-

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Crissi Blair lives with her family in west Auckland and spends her time reading and writing, mostly about children’s books. Crissi organised the Storylines Festival of New Zealand Children’s Writers and Illustrators for three years and publishes the useful guide New Zealand Children’s Books in Print which is updated every year. Visit www.silvertone.co.nz for more information.

Picture Books

Junior Fiction

Queen Alice’s Palaces

Hey Jack! The Circus Lesson

By Juliette MacIvor Illustrated by Lucia Masciullo ABC Books Hardback $29.99

By Sally Rippin Illustrated by Stephanie Spartels Hardie Grant Egmont Paperback $9.95

Queen Alice has the best palace in the land. Sir Hugh’s palace is falling down and he tries to trick Alice into designing a new palace, which he then plans to take by military coup. She has some very innovative building materials including bamboo (put together by pandas), icebergs and fondue cheese. Lots of fun with rhyming text. Ages 3 plus.

The Quiet Pirate Duck Creek Press Hardback $29.95

Barnaby would love to sing and shout and roar like the other pirates, but he’s just plain quiet. But he watches and thinks and when disaster strikes he gets to be top pirate after all. This is a classic tale with a tatty old boat, and roguish pirates with suitably piratical lingo. Smashing painted illustrations give extra spark to the characters. Ages 2-8.

Blue Moon Bird

By Nick Falk Illustrated by Tony Flowers Random House Paperback $16.99 Jack finds a tyrannosaurus in the middle of the ruined vegetable garden and has to hide it before his mum finds out. He builds a time machine to send it back to the Cretaceous period, but Jack and his dog are accidentally sent back in time too. More to follow in the series. Ages 6-10.

By Meredith Badger & Simon Swingler Hardie Grant Egmont Paperback $14.99

Theodore is a quiet boy who lives at the Turtleduck Toy Factory where there are extraordinarily complex toy-making machines that spring into action on the night of a rare blue moon, producing a little bird for Theodore. An entrancing simply told tale with textural and richly coloured illustrations in acrylic paint and pencil. Ages 3-8.

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By Sandy McKay Longacre Paperback $19.99

It’s 1914 and war has broken out in Europe. Tom’s older brother Jack has been called up and ends up on the front line. The story is told in the form of letters between Tom and Jack, describing the wartime experience at home and in the brutal midst of the war. Newspaper clippings add to the veracity of this sobering wartime story. Ages 10-16.

Felix and the Red Rats

By James Norcliffe Random House Paperback $19.99 David’s author uncle comes to visit and bizarre things start happening, like his brother’s rats turning bright red. David senses they are connected to a story he is reading that was written by his uncle, which makes up the alternate chapters of the book. In this story Felix and friend Bella are shifted into a strange land where they must solve a riddle that puts them in danger. Ages 9-12.

Soonchild

By Russell Hoban Walker Books Hardback $29.99 A mystical tale set in the Arctic Circle. SixteenFace John and his wife, No Problem, are expecting a baby – Soonchild. But the baby tells John it won’t come out because it cannot hear the World Songs, thus setting John on a mission to recover the songs. Pencil illustrations are perfect to capture the icy landscape and dark magic of this tale. Ages 8-12.

Magical Margaret Mahy By Betty Gilderdale Illustrated by Alan Gilderdale Puffin Paperback $19.99 This book was first written in 1987 and was updated following Margaret’s death last year. Read about the childhood, home, working life, travel and awards of one of NZ’s greatest writers. Told by someone who knew Margaret well, with lots of anecdotes and quotes and a great insight into why and how her books were written. Line drawings mainly of things found in Margaret’s home. Ages 7 plus.

The New Zealand Art Activity Book: 100+ Ideas for Creative Kids By Helen Lloyd Te Papa Press Paperback $29.99

Activities to help children (and adults) see, think and draw like an artist, using works of art from the Te Papa collection and new work by leading artists made especially for this book. Includes full-colour reproductions of some work. Draw a mural, turn a circle into a 3D ball, draw your own landscape, put on an exhibition. Ages 8 plus.

The Elephant’s Friend and Other Tales from Ancient India Retold and illustrated by Marcia Williams Walker Books Hardback $32.99 Paperback $18.99

This big bright comic-format book provides modern interpretations of eight folktales from India. The characters are mainly animals and are rather like Aesop’s fables, with a moral to each story. The colours are straight from India too, bright with gorgeous patterns and fun along with the message in each one. Ages 7-12.

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The Baddies are evil superhero kids who are constantly fighting with the Goodies. Their schools are adjacent and they’re already fighting on the first day of term. Scorder lives in a volcano and makes fire. His friends, a mixture of boys and girls, all have their own skills – Sand Storm turns into a whirlwind and Frosty can make ice out of thin air. Bright illustrated panels and simple text will lure in readers aged 6-10.

When Our Jack Went to War

Knowledge books

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Saurus Street: Tyrannosaurus in the Veggie Patch

Super Baddies: Baddies vs Goodies

By Sabrina Malcolm Scholastic Paperback $19.50

Tips

Jack’s best friend is Billie B Brown, (who has her own great series). Jack’s cousin Sue is babysitting. She practises for her circus act, orders pizza for dinner and suggests they sleep under the stars – an adventurous night for Jack who is nervous but learns that trying new things can be fun. Perfect for the new reader. Ages 5-7.

Intermediate Fiction

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