3rd Act Magazine – Fall 2021 by 3rd Act Magazine

PUGET SOUND

Passionate Purpose ADD MEANING AND JOY TO LIFE BY DOING SOMETHING YOU LOVE

LeRoy Bell Rocks On At 70, He’s Having the Time of His Life

Turning Bombs into Trees

GRIEF INSPIRED A LIFE LIVED WITH PURPOSE

HOW TO GET UNSTUCK Turn Bad Habits into Good

ENTER STAGE LEFT

Live Performances are Back

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MESSAGE from the publisher

Harnessing the Power of Purpose In the early 1990s, I attended a series Like in the butterfly effect, small things of retreats and workshops titled, “The can have an outsized effect on complex Power of Purpose.” I was in my 30s and systems. suspected, even then, how important it is In this issue we explore how to live with to live with purpose. Why I felt I needed purpose large and small. In her essay, “Got more purpose than being a wife, a mother Purpose?” (page 34) Sally Fox suggests we of two small children, the foster mother think of purpose as a verb instead of a noun, of a troubled teen, and a “purposing,” something business owner is worth we do throughout our In this issue we lives such as lifelong considering. My life was so awash with purpose I explore how to learning. Unlike when couldn’t see the forest for we were young, “Our the trees. I think in my live with purpose reasons for reentering mind, people who lived large and small. the classroom may be with purpose were the mainly socially purposeones who did big things— driven,” says Jeanette the Jane Goodalls of the world—and my Leardi in “Learning on Purpose— everyday life didn’t qualify. So, I went The Older and Wiser Way” (page 14). looking for more. Something bigger. Ballerina, sculpturer, and author Helen Now I know better. Fleder (“View from Here,” page 12) has While I will always admire and had to adapt as she’s aged but finds new appreciate people seemingly filled with purpose every day. At 97, she gives regular clear purpose and who accomplish presentations in her community on how noteworthy things, finding meaning in the attitude and lifestyle help us live longer quiet little purposes that fill our daily lives and better. And then there are people is open to all of us. Perhaps the biggest like Bainbridge Island resident Jerilyn gift we can give ourselves is to notice and Brusseau, recipient of AARP’s Purpose acknowledge the small daily actions we Prize for her decades-long commitment to take to show up for others, to improve removing unexploded bombs in Vietnam. our lives, to better our health, and grow. (“Turning Bombs into Trees” on page 38). At just shy of 65, my life continues to be awash with purpose as a wife, mother, A fan selfie with grandmother, and a third act business LeRoy Bell. owner. 3rd Act Magazine enriches my life daily. It’s my teacher and surrounds me with purposeful people—our writers and contributors, the inspirational people we meet and interview, and all of the talented behind-the-scenes people who make this publication possible. And of course, we couldn’t be here without the support of our advertisers and subscribers. Thank you. Life is amazing! Proof positive of the power of purpose.

OU R VI SI ON Now, more than ever, older adults are viewing their retirement as a “Third Act” in their lives: A time for reinvention, connection, and engagement. 3rd Act Magazine is a bold, fresh, lifestyle magazine for older adults in the Puget Sound region. Our stories and articles challenge the worn-out perceptions of aging and offer a dynamic new vision: Let’s celebrate and embrace this stage of life, and age together with confidence. PU B LI SH E RS Victoria Starr Marshall David Marshall EDITOR Victoria Starr Marshall COPY EDITOR Tina Potterf ART DIRECTOR Philip Krayna WEBSITE Philip Krayna ADVERTISING Dale Bohm, Kajsa Puckett, Brieanna Hansen Encore Media Group DISTRIBUTION & CIRCULATION David Marshall COVER PHOTO Ernie Sapiro WRITE TO US 3rd Act Magazine wants to hear from you! Email your comments, ideas, and questions to info@3rdActMag.com or mail to 81 Canal Lane, Brinnon, WA 98320 3rd Act Magazine is published quarterly by Oshi Publishing, LLC. The opinions, advice, or statements expressed by contributing writers do not reflect those of the editors, the publishers, or of 3rd Act Magazine. Copyright ©2021 Oshi Publishing, LLC. All rights reserved. Oshi Publishing, LLC, 81 Canal Lane Brinnon, WA 98320 · 360-796-4837 Email: info@3rdActMag.com For subscriptions, advertising rates, and additional information, visit us at www.3rdActMag.com.

3rd Act magazine | fall 2021

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3rd Act magazine | fall 2021

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contents FEATURES 30 LEROY BELL ROCKS ON

For this Seattle musician, lifelong purpose has always been clear as a Bell. JULIE FANSELOW

34 GOT PURPOSE? Simple ways to add more meaning to your life. SALLY FOX

38 TURNING BOMBS INTO TREES

A tragic loss sparked Jerilyn Brusseau’s ambitious mission to heal herself, a war-torn land, and others. ANN HEDREEN

46 THERE'S A PODCAST FOR

THAT! Audio storytelling has made

a huge comeback through podcasts. Here are some of our favorites. ANN RANDALL

59 E NTER STAGE LEFT

After more than a year of dark stages, Seattle area theaters get ready to raise the curtain once again. MISHA BERSON

COLUMNS 8 AGING WITH INTENTION

How to find your passionate purpose. LINDA HENRY

12 THE VIEW FROM HERE

A look at the sunny side of aging at age 97. HELEN FLEDER

22 E NLIGHTENED AGING

The benefits of slow medicine. DR. ERIC B. LARSON

44 M IND THE SPIRIT

A case for uncoupling from technology. STEPHEN SINCLAIR

49 THE LIGHTER SIDE

Faux “service dogs” draw out her canine curmudgeon. ANNIE CULVER

Aging with Confidence

fall 2021

| 3rd Act magazine

57 WELLNESS 10 G ETTING UNSTUCK

Make today “start a good habit” day.

MICHAEL C. PATTERSON

16 FROM CAT LITTER TO BARBELLS When unable

to get cat litter into her cart this octogenarian hit the gym. HALEY SHAPLEY

18 AT ANY AGE Don’t let outdated

ideas about age keep you from sports and activities you enjoy.

MICHAEL SORENG

20 DO LESS AND MOVE MORE Learn how to move more efficiently and with less effort with the Feldenkrais Method.® W.R. SHAW

56 N OURISH YOUR BODY

It's time to trade in your Joy of Cooking for Mark Bittman's How to Cook Everything.

REBECCA CRICHTON

LIFESTYLE 14 LEARNING ON PURPOSE

Lifelong learners can take advantage of older-brain skills. JEANETTE LEARDI

24 EARTHLY REMAINS

Burial? Cremation? Other? What to do with the body when we die. DAVE BACHMANN

28 DREAM CATCHING

Seeing lists in a new light. BILL VERNON

40 ROLLING WITH THE

CHANGES When COVID-19

upended a dream of teaching abroad, the world came to her. JULIE FANSELOW

42 OUR INNER AGEIST

Our hidden attitudes and images of age shape our actual experience. DR. CONNIE ZWEIG

50 MY THIRD ACT

Life as a winemaker. DR. PATRICIA BUTTERFIELD

52 DISCOVER NORTHWEST PUGET SOUND

Passionate Purpose

54 RICK STEVES TRAVEL

ADD MEANING AND JOY TO LIFE BY DOING SOMETHING YOU LOVE

LeRoy Bell Rocks On At 70, He’s Having the Time of His Life

Turning Bombs into Trees

GRIEF INSPIRED A LIFE LIVED WITH PURPOSE

HOW TO GET UNSTUCK Turn Bad Habits into Good

ENTER STAGE LEFT

Live Performances are Back

SLOW MEDICINE

Guard Against Overtreatment

Cover: At 70, Seattle artist LeRoy Bell is playing some of the best music of his life. In his song, “If I Should Die Tonight,”he declares, ”If I should die tonight...I'm happy where I am, with this guitar in my hand.” May we all be as lucky. Photo by Ernie Sapiro

Traveling the White Pass Scenic Byway. ANN RANDALL

3rd Act magazine | fall 2021

Croatia’s stunning Plitvice Lakes. RICK STEVES

IN EVERY ISSUE 62 BOOKS We review three gems you

won't find on the NY Times reading list. REVIEWED BY VICTORIA STARR MARSHALL

64 B RAIN GAMES

Challenge yourself with these word puzzles.

LETTERS Work Dreams Once again, I’m blown away by the inspiring, informative, and encouraging articles in the summer edition of 3rd Act. Retired from school counseling for several years, I discovered many creative avenues to be involved in. Yet, I have recurring dreams of being “back at work.” I especially enjoyed, “On the Job After 65 (or 90)” by Jack Bernard and “Work, Work, Work, Is that All You Do?” by Danna Walker. What we do does not define us. Who we are does. Keep up the good work! —Ellen Reichman, Kirkland

Passion Comes Through I am so impressed with your staff, and especially with you, Victoria. Your passion has consistently turned out an amazing magazine featuring people, places, and things that are enjoyable to read about. I love how you feature deserving, local people, and groups. I was honored to be featured (“A Little to the Left of Disobedient”) in your summer issue. It was a beautiful article, filled with the peaks and valleys I’ve experienced to get here. It made me so proud to see where I started and where I am now Thank you, thank you, thank you! —Sandra Lee, Lacey

Aw, shucks, thank you, Sandra. I have the privilege of getting inspired by amazing people like you every day. You make my job easy. —Victoria Marshall, Editor

talk to us!

by mail: 3rd Act Magazine, 81 Canal Lane, Brinnon, WA 98320 by email: info@3rdActMag.com Please include your name, city, state, and phone number when possible. Letters may be edited for length and clarity. www.3rdActMag.com

MARKETING FEATURE

COMMUNITYCONNECTION COMMUNITYCONNECTION MARKETING FEATURE

A U T U M N 2021

Puget Sound // WA

A U T U M N 2021

Puget Sound // WA

New Home Optionfor for New HomeOwnership Ownership Option Soon Active Adults Active Adults(62+) (62+)is is Coming Coming Soon

W W

hen lookstoto henthe theVillage Village Cooperative Cooperative looks developaanew newhousing housing community develop communityfor for active adults, they carefully select the active adults, they carefully select the using a wholehost hostof of data data points. points. But areaarea using a whole Butthese these communities don’t serve data points, they serve communities don’t serve data points, they servereal real people. That’s why they are so excited about their people. That’s why they are so excited about their communities in Puyallup, which is now under communities in Puyallup, which is now under construction, and Olympia, construction starts soon. construction, and Olympia, construction starts soon.

What is a senior cooperative? This home What is a senior cooperative? This home ownership option lives very different from a singleownership option lives very different from a singlefamily home, townhouse, condo or assisted living family home, townhouse, community. When peoplecondo decideor to assisted live here,living they’re not only wanting get riddecide of the to oversized house that community. When to people live here, they’re too much effort andoversized money to maintain, notrequires only wanting to time, get rid of the house that but also live better, have closer ties to to their requires tooto much time,toeffort and money maintain, neighbors and families, and to have the little luxuries but also to live better, to have closer ties to their they deserve without the worries of maintenance

neighbors and families, and to have the little luxuries they deserve without the worries of maintenance

or expensive “surprise” repair bills. The Village Cooperative offers a unique building design, management style and ownership or expensive “surprise” repair bills. structure developed specifically for active adults (age 62+). Instead of buying a home outright for The Village Cooperative offers a unique $450,000 or more, Village Cooperative owners building design, management style and ownership purchase an equity share, typically around $190,000 structure developed specifically for active adults and then a monthly share of the operating expenses of (age 62+). Instead of buying a home outrightoffor about $1,800 (based on the size and location the $450,000 or more, Village Cooperative owners home) that covers all maintenance outside and inside purchase an equity share, typically $190,000 the homes, including replacing youraround light bulbs.

and then a monthly share of the operating expenses of about $1,800 (based on the size and location of the home) that covers all maintenance outside and inside the homes, including replacing your light bulbs. Aging with Confidence

Architectural rendering of the Village Cooperative

The value of this equity share increases in a The value of thisatequity share predictable way, appreciating 3 percent for increases every yearin a predictable way, appreciating at 3 percent forfact every that members live at the Village Cooperative. “The that year members live Village Cooperative. “The fact that thethat equity goes back to at ourthe member-owners with an annual the increase, equity goes to our payment member-owners with an annual equity and back the monthly includes all maintenance costs forand much than a payment local apartment’s equity increase, theless monthly includes all rent, makes this a 'no-brainer' for many people,” says Steve maintenance costs for much less than a local apartment’s Von Schmidt, Marketing Director for the company. “Plus, rent, makes this a 'no-brainer' for many people,” says Steve theVon safety, security Marketing and convenience we offer gives the Schmidt, Director for the company. “Plus, peace of mind active adults need with the social the safety, security and convenience we offer gives the opportunities they want.”

peace of mind active adults need with the social While it’s they not a want.” new concept, it is new to this area. opportunities

In fact, senior housing cooperatives have been around for While it’s not a new concept,theit Midwest. is new to this area. over 40 years, primarily found throughout senior housing have been around for “AsIna fact, national leader with 41cooperatives locations in 10 states either over 40under years, primarily or found throughout the Midwest. operating, construction planned for construction this“As year, believeleader that, with amenitiesinand sucheither a we national withall 41the locations 10 at states a great value, this is the best option available in the operating, under construction or planned for market construction forthis active seniors,” says Von Schmidt. are and at such year, we believe that, with allReservations the amenities already being taken for the Village Cooperative of South a great value, this is the best option available in the market Sound (Olympia) and the Village Cooperative of Puyallup. for active seniors,” says Von Schmidt. Reservations are Homes are selling quickly, so now is the time to cash out of already being taken for the Village Cooperative of South your house and move-in to a carefree lifestyle. Call for Sound (Olympia) andinformation the Villageseminar. Cooperative of Puyallup. details or to attend a free Personal Homes areare selling quickly, so now is the time to cash out of appointments also available upon request.

your house and move-in to a carefree lifestyle. Call for details or to attend a free information seminar. Personal appointments are also available upon request. Village Cooperative of South Sound ( O l y m p i a )

Phone: (360) 350-4828 Village Cooperative of South Sound ( O l y m p i a ) Village Cooperative of Puyallup Phone: (360)

350-4828 For more details, visit:

villagecooperative.com

Phone: (253) 387-7600

Village Cooperative of Puyallup

Phone: (253) 387-7600

fall 2021

For more details, visit: villagecooperative.com

| 3rd Act magazine

AGING WITH INTENTION

Finding Passionate Purpose BY LINDA HENRY

Linda Henry writes regularly on topics related to aging, health care, and communication, and is the coauthor of several books, including Transformational Eldercare from the Inside Out: StrengthsBased Strategies for Caring. She conducts workshops nationally on aging and creating caring work environments. Her volunteer emphasis is age-friendly communities.

In my young adulthood, I do not recall thinking about passion or purpose, and I suspect that is true for most of us. Danish philosopher Søren Kierkegaard’s assertion that “life can only be understood backwards, but it must be lived forward,” invites us to contemplate our life’s story, past and present. Picture a set of drawers. Now, imagine that each drawer contains pieces of our story—heritage, instinct, genes, parental/cultural training, education, life/work experiences, and our passionate purpose. By sifting through these nuggets, not only will we gain a better awareness of who we are, but also we will be better prepared for our future. Ralph Waldo Emerson believes purpose is to “…be compassionate and to have it make some difference that you have lived and lived well.” Theologian Frederick Buechner maintains that a vocation is the place where your deep gladness meets the world’s deep needs. Passion has been likened to an activity, goal, or cause that leads one to consciously give up other enjoyable activities in order to focus on this particular objective. It is something that you love to do so much so that you almost can not, not do. It brings joy and delight. According to one physician, passion implies a love of your work, something that you would perform even if you were not paid. Purpose can evolve at any stage in life. One physician began his professional career as a minister. The call of medicine remained, however, until he finally entered his medical practice at midlife. Passions differ. When my friend Henry was 12, he discovered a passion for sailing. His love

3rd Act magazine | fall 2021

for the water and boating never diminished leading to his sailing competitively, often giving up his limited vacation to do so. Now, nearing retirement, he is exploring how to sustain this enthusiasm. Another friend of mine, Maggie, loves to learn. If she does not know the answer to something, she researches it or takes a class. Then there’s Lee. She strongly believes that her purpose in life is to help others. Her passion for lifelong learning has led her to pursue post-college educational opportunities that have enhanced her nursing proficiencies. If we believe the premise that life is a forward motion in which we are constantly taking new actions and making new choices based on those

we have made previously, then a greater awareness of what motivates us will help us to plan for our future, no matter our age. Reflect on how your passion might change as you age. If you are one of the nearly three quarters of America’s adults believing themselves to be a lifelong learner, consider taking advantage of the non-degree or special interest classes offered by many universities, community colleges, or retirement communities. If you enjoy traveling, think about a class or volunteering with a local group to better understand the community. Or, use your professional skills as a volunteer or mentor. Our challenge then is to think about ways we can continue to do what motivates us or gives us joy. Will you accept?

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MakeToday“StartaGoodHabit”Day

Today is the perfect day to break away froma bad habit and replace it with a good one by Michael Patterson

ur lives run on habits and routines. Most of them serve us quite well. But some habits— you know the ones I’m talking about—are counterproductive and need to be replaced by better ones. Today is a great day to start because you can take advantage of what is known as a “fresh start” event. Research shows that people are more successful at adopting healthy habits if they begin during a time of perceived change. As I write this, we are transitioning out of a long period of COVID-19 restrictions. We have gone through a stretch of time in which many of our normal routines were disrupted or significantly modified. Now we can begin a return to normal. Or, better yet, we can create a new normal for ourselves. A fresh start event is a time of transition, when we feel that we can leave the past behind and step boldly into a new future. We feel liberated by these transition periods. It’s like getting a do-over, a mulligan. We may have messed up in the past, but today is a new day. We start with a clean slate. We get to reinvent ourselves and create our new normal. The post-pandemic transition isn’t the only fresh start that is available to you. Lots of other dates can serve as fresh start opportunities if you so desire. The beginning of the new year is a classic fresh start event. But you can decide that the start of a new week gives you a fresh start opportunity. Or a new day! “Hey! This is the first day of the rest of my life. And I’m a new me.”

3rd Act magazine | fall 2021

So, seize the moment! Make a fresh start today by establishing a new, healthy habit. Here’s a distillation of expert advice to help you in this endeavor: Focus on a Good Replacement Habit: Avoid the mistake of trying to get rid of your bad habits. Any attention given to the bad routine just reinforces the neural networks that trigger and support the maladaptive behavior. Instead, focus your mental energy on establishing a new and improved habit to replace the old one. Repeat and Rehearse: You strengthen new neural networks by repeatedly activating them. The more you purposely activate the new routine, the more automatic it becomes. Gradually, the new and improved routine will become more automatic than the bad one. Be Creative with Immediate Gratification: We hold onto bad habits because they provide us with immediate rewards. A new replacement habit must equal that reward. The problem with many good habits is that the tangible benefits occur sometime in the distant future. The trick, therefore, is to find a way to make the good new habit fun and rewarding right now! Like Mary Poppins said, “a spoonful of sugar…” If sweating in spandex at the gym sounds dreadful, put on your dancing shoes and boogie the night away. Develop Commitment Devices: Coerce yourself into doing the right thing. Make a public statement that you are going to adopt a new, healthy

routine. Or up the ante a bit. Give your best friend $500 and tell them they can keep it if you fail to reach a specific goal, like losing five pounds in two months, or dancing like a lunatic at least once per week. Make Cue-Based Plans: Having a plan with specific strategies (wild dancing), tactics (dance club) and timelines (Thursdays at 8 p.m.) is hugely important. Make your plans even stronger by attaching a cue that kicks the plan into action. “When this happens, I’ll do that.” “When I finish washing the dinner dishes, I’ll dance a joyous jig for five minutes.” Chunking: How do you eat a Woolly Mammoth? One bite at a time. Break large goals into smaller, bite-sized chunks. If your goal is to lose 24 pound this year, set goals of two pounds per month, or a half a pound per week. Celebrate Small Wins: Each time you finish one bite, cross it off your “To Do” list and celebrate your achievement. Reward yourself. “Whoo hoo. Lost a half pound this week. I’m going dancing!” Find the Flow: A flow state occurs when you have the resources you need to meet an engaging and exciting challenge. An easy challenge is boring. An impossible challenge is disheartening. Wiggle Room: Research shows that we do a better job of sticking to a plan when we give ourselves a bit of wiggle room. If your goal is to exercise every day of the week at 10 a.m., give yourself some wiggle room. It’s okay if you exercise at 3 p.m. and skip a

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day. Research shows that wiggle roomers actually get more exercise than strict by-the-bookers.

become automatic and our default settings. Embrace your positive habits and routines.

Free Passes: Similar idea. Give yourself a break. Go easy. Be selfcompassionate. If you are trying to establish healthy eating habits, it isn’t the end of the world if you eat one jelly donut. Give yourself one or two “free passes” per week.

Embarrassingly Easy First Steps: Often the first step is the hardest, so make the first step embarrassingly easy; so simple, so doable, that you will blush if you fail to take it. Shame yourself into action.

Positive Peer Pressure: Hang out with people who behave the way you want to behave. Avoid people who indulge in the bad habits you want to escape. Be careful, however, not to hang out with peer groups that perform at a seemingly impossible level. Dance with crazy people, not pros.

Ramp It Up: Start easy. When the new habit can be performed with elegant style and grace, ramp it up a notch. Strive for constant, incremental improvement, a smidgen at a time.

Make Laziness Work for You: The upside of laziness is that it encourages us to be efficient and find shortcuts. Habits and routines—if they promote positive behaviors—are great! They

Michael C. Patterson, founder and CEO of MINDRAMP Consulting, writes extensively on the art and science of brain health and mental flourishing. He is an educator and consultant who previously managed AARP’s Staying Sharp brain health program and helped develop the field of creative aging.

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Aging with Confidence

fall 2021

| 3rd Act magazine 11

THE VIEW FROM HERE

The Sunny Side of Aging BY HELEN FLEDER, AGE 97

As we age, time seems to move too swiftly and relentlessly. Our mirror reflects the way gravity reshapes our face and body, and in time, denies us a once full and luxuriant head of hair. We find ourselves walking a bit more tenuously and less erect, stealing inches from our once proud posture and the perfect balance we could depend on for stability. However, when it comes to having regrets about aging, there is a silver lining. Although we will never regain our once-youthful appearance There is no way to avoid or enjoy the boundless energy that empowered aging, but we can focus our multitasking, we are on its advantages. With no longer demanding the passing of time we of our expectations for need to replace regrets achieving success, or feel with appreciation for our the need to apologize for our shortcomings. We blessings and pride in have learned to appreciate our accomplishments. our admirable qualities that keep us young at heart. We have greater opportunities to socialize, and treasure times we can spend with friends and family who give purpose to our lives and help us remain ageless and unalterable.

“

”

3rd Act magazine | fall 2021

We admit to being part of a generation that are unable to grasp the meaning of the words and cadence of current popular music. We may find the acceptable social mores of the youth distasteful. We are often confused and intimidated learning how to adjust to an electronic age when texting became the preferred method of communication, and the sound of a familiar voice responding to a phone call was replaced by digital messaging. Then again, we can proudly boast of our creative writing skills, cursive handwriting, proper grammar, and correct spelling, an essential part of our education but seriously lacking today. Our years of experience have also given us practical knowledge and wisdom, as beneficial as anything one can learn from social media! Although we have to admit that our hearing may need a boost, and our memory may be waning, we are now at an age when we have earned the luxury to spend time as we please. We feel free of major responsibilities, have the opportunity to learn new skills, and can engage in activities that may be challenging, but will enlighten our lives. There is no way to avoid aging, but we can focus on its advantages. With the passing of time we need to replace regrets with appreciation for our blessings and pride in our accomplishments. We lived and were guided by rules that taught us the meaning of honor and respect, as well as how to write “thank you” notes when we received a gift. Perhaps that is why we are thought of as the “Greatest Generation” and have so many reasons to be grateful! Helen Fleder has been involved in the arts for more than 70 years as a ballet dancer, professional sculptor, and published author. In 2005, the Sarasota Community Foundation recognized her 60 years of volunteer service— teaching dance therapy and body movement to psychiatric patients, physically handicapped children, and the blind. More recently she has done art/collage with Alzheimer patients, worked with the Sarasota Arts Council, and helped develop art programs for a local high school. She lives in a retirement community in Sarasota, Florida.

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When we go to sell my mother’s home, will she have to leave with every buyer showing? Her mobility is very limited, and it takes her about ten minutes just to get to the car. I have heard she will have to leave for each showing. Can she stay in the home while buyers view it?

Yes, her real estate broker can share in the private showing instructions to buyer brokers that the seller will remain in the home during showings. This is a reasonable accommodation to request. That being said, when sellers make it easy for buyers to view their home, and allow many showings each day, this can increase the buyer pool and potential for a better sale outcome. Buyers feel awkward when the seller is present, like they are intruding. This can discourage buyer interest. So that your mother doesn’t have to endure the frequent daily interruptions competition less fierce. We also expect of buyer showings, and to lower her interest rates to slowly creep up. This stress, another option is to have her may cool off the intense bidding wars. stay elsewhere during the first week If you are not in a hurry as some buyers or two of her home’s listing. This way, are, and have no urgent deadlines, you her home can stay “show-ready” all have the unique advantage of being hours of the day, and she won’t have strangers coming and able to take your time DO YOU HAVE A REAL ESTATE in your home search. It QUESTION FOR US? SEND IT TO: going around her. This is a good idea to start QUESTIONS@SASHREALTY.COM has the potential to create thousands more to look now: attend in her final sale price. If open houses, set up auto-searches she prefers to stay home, however, this on real estate apps, and start to tour homes that interest you. This will help is definitely her choice, and her right to you to get savvy on home values and request. Good luck!

REAL ESTATE Q & A FOR EVERY SEASON OF LIFE BY REBECCA BOMANN OF SASH

We’re retired and want to find a one-story home with some garden space not too far from our doctors. The market seems crazy right now, and we don’t want to overpay for a home. Should we wait till it cools down, or are homes just going to keep going up in price?

Even the most experienced real estate broker can’t predict with 100% certainty what will happen in the real estate market in coming months. However, industry experts who track market data are expecting a slight cool down in the next year from the current red-hot frenzy. We expect more housing inventory to come on the market, which will give buyers more homes to choose from, making

the features you like in a home. When you find “the one”, a good real estate broker can help you win the home with expert guidance. It’s never too early to start looking, and then you’ll know when you’re ready to make an offer.

Rebecca Bomann is Founder and CEO of SASH Services, and Designated Broker of SASH Realty. With a background in social work and elder care, Rebecca created SASH to provide real estate services tailored for clients’ unique needs. Since 2005, SASH has served clients of all ages, with specialized home sale services for older adults and their families.

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fall 2021

| 3rd Act magazine 13

Being back in a classroom can help you reach your goals—if you take advantage of your older-brain skills.

LEARNING ON PURPOSE— THE OLDER AND WISER WAY

hirteen years ago, at age 56 and after more than three decades as a writer of educational materials for children, I decided to pursue an encore career as a community educator to older adults. So I entered a college graduate-level gerontology program and took my place as a student. After such a long absence from a university setting, I was worried: Would my older brain be able to tap into those long lost study habits of researching, paper writing, memorizing, and test taking? Could I hold my own among classmates 30 years my junior? Or would stereotypical generational expectations get in the way of us accepting one another as peers?

3rd Act magazine | fall 2021

BY JEANETTE LEARDI THE OLDER—AND WISER—STUDENT

If you’re like me, your early student years were preoccupied mostly with getting good marks on papers and tests, pleasing your teachers, and moving on to the next grade level. The ultimate goal? Finishing school and getting that first well-paying job in the career of your choice. But as we age, our motivations often change. As we are more independentminded and experienced, our reasons for reentering the classroom may be mainly socially purpose-driven. Whether we enroll in an academic program, or an informal lifelonglearning class, we want to learn things just for the sake of learning, help us

give back to society, or leave a legacy for those we love. Nevertheless, we often doubt whether or not we’re still up to the task of “hitting the books.” My back-to-school experience taught me two important lessons about us older students: 1) We have a greater stockpile of knowledge from which to draw than our decades-younger selves had; and 2) We require specifically tailored learning approaches because our brains have changed. OUR CHANGING BRAINS

Beginning around age 30, our brains shrink in volume about one-half of 1% each year, our reaction times slow down, and we may find it harder to multitask, follow complicated www.3rdActMag.com

directions, and absorb new information. That’s the not-so-good news. But here’s the great news: As we age, we develop and improve upon certain powerful cognitive skills. For example: We have formed trillions more connections between brain cells. The longer we have been exposed to new and different experiences, ideas, and pieces of information, and the more often we have applied that knowledge in various ways, the larger our brain’s “library” has become and the more “superhighway routes” we have created to access those volumes of information. That capacity makes it easier to eventually integrate the things we learn in class with what we already know. Our brain hemispheres operate in greater sync. About the time that we reach age 50, a bridge of tissue known as the corpus callosum, which connects the left and right hemispheres, has fully matured, allowing us to solve problems from more perspectives. Life’s challenges no longer trigger in us blackand-white interpretations but rather an understanding and appreciation of their gray areas. We are better able to see the subtleties involved in any issue and to speculate about obstacles that might get in the way of solving a problem. We excel in single-task performance. Provided that we’re not interrupted by people or distracted by environmental conditions, we can focus our attention longer and apply ourselves more diligently than can those with decades-younger brains that are hardwired to shift gears more often. Our thinking abilities make us more self-sufficient. We usually require less individual supervision and guidance because our years of life have taught us many effective shortcuts and techniques for weeding out which information is relevant and which is irrelevant when doing a task or meeting Aging with Confidence

a goal. In a classroom situation, this trait can put us at an advantage when taking notes and completing assignments. A pretty impressive group of mature-brain skills, isn’t it? AN OPTIMAL-LEARNING CHECKLIST

As you consider any workshop or course, try to find one that will maximize your learning based on these important abilities. The best group setting will include: • An environment free of physical distractions (outside noise, uncomfortable seating, an extreme room temperature, etc.) • A peer relationship with an instructor who appreciates the experience and wisdom you can bring to class • A variety of stimulating (hands-on, intergenerational, etc.) activities • Flexibility in approaching and completing assignments based on your particular limitations and interests

Here’s the great news: As we age, we develop and improve upon certain powerful cognitive skills. • Lessons that encourage you to make connections between the curriculum content and your life experiences • Abstract information explained through the use of anecdotes and case studies • Regular individualized feedback from your instructor and classmates • Enough time for you to review new material on a regular basis • Value placed on practical application over rote memorization

Realistically, not all of these needs will be met by one teacher in one course. Nevertheless, this list can help you decide if the class you’re considering will be a good fit for the experience you’re hoping to have. And of course, you can discuss these options with the instructor, who might be open to incorporating as many of them as possible. Another thing to keep in mind: While you might feel a sense of comfort, familiarity, and camaraderie when you learn alongside others your age, there’s something to be said about the added excitement that can happen in an intergenerational class by being exposed to ideas and opinions that can surprise you and expand your understanding. If this option intrigues you, consider checking out classes and workshops beyond those offered in senior centers. So, how did I fare during my backto-the-classroom time? In my graduate classes, I was fortunate to have been taught by gerontologists, who already understood the needs and assets of the older brain. As a result, my classroom experiences were mutual teaching ones. My younger classmates—as well as my instructors—learned from me as I did from them. Lifelong education can be a tremendously rewarding experience. Luckily, as we age, that reward increases if we keep in mind not only our purpose for learning, but also the maximum benefits we can get from it thanks to our amazing older-brain skills. Jeanette Leardi is a Portland-based social gerontologist, writer, editor, and community educator who has a passion for older adult empowerment. She gives popular presentations and workshops in journaling, memoir writing, ethical will creation, brain fitness, creativity, ageism, intergenerational communication, and caregiver support to people of all ages. Learn more about her work at jeanetteleardi.com.

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| 3rd Act magazine 15

from cat litter to barbells

an assessment of what she could do. She remembers that she couldn’t complete a single sit-up or get off the floor without using a box to pull herself up. She started a program of lifting light weights, and within a couple of weeks, she felt her strength returning. She was Several years ago, Edie Edmundson stood in a store, able to do sit-ups, and getting off the floor was becoming staring down a 25-pound bucket of kitty litter. There was a easier. A year in, she’d lost fat, gained muscle, and felt she problem—she couldn’t get it into her cart. looked better in her clothes, although that was just a fringe “I asked a customer to take it down,” she says. “I thought, benefit. “I was starting to feel more energy,” she says. ‘This is ridiculous. I can’t depend on other people to do “I really liked being able to do the day-to-day things better, simple things for me.’” like pulling a suitcase through an airport, and going up and Now 83, the Burlington, Washington-based retired down stairs.” businesswoman was always active growing up and had been Once she could lift 25 pounds, she went for 35, and then the captain of the drill team. But no one back then for 50. On her 81st birthday, she deadlifted 121 BY HALEY lifted weights, not even the boys. She never really pounds, a fact that lights up her face to share. In SHAPLEY considered it an activity she might like to try until fact, the deadlift—a movement where you lift the that wave of frustration came over her in the grocery store weight from the floor to hip level—has become her favorite aisle. exercise in the gym because it shows just how much her In a case of serendipitous timing, she found her solution strength has improved. when she won a one-month membership to a gym, CrossFit “The body is meant to work, and when it doesn’t work, Skagit, around that same time. They started her off with it gets really lazy,” she says. “The more you sit, the more you want to sit.” As much as Edmundson understands the gravitational pull to want to sit (how lovely it is to curl up with a good book!), it’s worth it for her to keep moving. Edmundson can do all those things that aren’t always easy as one gets older such as walk to the mailbox, stand on her feet to cook, and get out of a chair. And of course, that bucket of cat litter is no longer a problem. In fact, she now finds herself helping others get items into their cart at the store. “There’s so much we take for granted—walking, running, zipping around in the stores, putting our groceries into the back of the trunk,” Edmundson says. “People don’t expect older people to be able to do things like that, but that’s not a problem for me. I’m able to move.” Haley Shapley is a freelance writer based in Seattle. This article is adapted from her book, Strong Like Her: A Celebration of Rule Breakers, History Makers, and Unstoppable Athletes, published by Simon & Schuster’s Gallery Books in 2020.

3rd Act magazine | fall 2021

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The Costume Makes Me Ageless

Live Like You Mean It

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Join the Golden Age of Lifelong Learning

Still Clowning Around at 73

A Whole New Place to Retire

Start Your Year Off With a Laugh

3 Washington Towns Worth Considering

ELDER ACTIVISM

CAREGIVING HEROES

Social Justice with Social Distancing

A Tough Job Just Got Harder

BUILDING RESILIENCE

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AGING WITH PRIDE GenPride serves LGBTQ Seniors

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THE OTHER BOOM Retirement Living Options Surge

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Together Forever Why We Get Happier with Age It’s Never Too Late to Date

Parting with a Home You Love

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Aquarius Will Boomers Change Aging?

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Modern Matchmaking

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50 Ways to Thrive

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A QUILT OF HEROES Renewing the Fabric of America

Life as Poetry

Art Without Borders

The Sublime Work of Seattle Artist Alfredo Arreguin

NEW LEASHES ON LIFE Loving Homes for Senior Dogs

TRAVEL Stretch Your Comfort Zone

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fall 2021

| 3rd Act magazine 17

AT ANY AGE

Last fall during my annual cardiology visit, the doctor glanced through a paper. “You’re 80. You made it!” I did not know how to take his remark. It sounded like a finality statement—you crossed the finish line and you can throw in the towel. Take a break and relax. On the other hand, perhaps he was congratulating me on living past the average life span. Whatever he meant does not matter to me. Since that visit, I have added another year to my span, and I am not ready to throw in the towel. I want to keep moving as long as I am able. “Maybe you shouldn’t be doing what you are doing at your age.” One of our 57-year-old daughters, (we have twins), admonished me on the phone. I had just come into our house after shoveling snow from our driveway, and my wife, Vivian, handed the phone to me to say hi to our daughter in Las Vegas. “Maybe you shouldn’t do it at your age either,” I replied, half in jest, and her comment reminded me of an incident that happened 16 years earlier in Arizona

3rd Act magazine | fall 2021

Don’t let outdated ideas about age keep you from sports and activities you enjoy by Michael Soreng

when I was just 65. One morning I jogged my daily loop around the perimeter of Sun Vista RV Resort, our winter location for some years in the Arizona desert. I had just passed the twin palms that marked my halfway point when a man walking toward me caught my attention. He stuck a scrawny arm into the air, and I stopped. He resembled many of the other male snowbirds in the park, paunchy and gray-haired. “You shouldn’t be doing that at your age.” “What?” “You’re too old to be running.” “Oh,” I replied. I smiled, waved, and resumed my jog. I didn’t want to spend my time chatting about what I should and should not do, especially when it related to exercise, and the sun climbing above the hills east of Yuma reminded me to finish my jog before the heat of the day. I jogged along to our park model, and

after wondering how old that man thought I was, I dismissed the encounter. Over the years, I have noticed many gray-haired runners and cyclists who did not let advanced age curtail their activity. I observed that age had little to do with living an active lifestyle. Jack LaLanne used to work out three hours a day until his later years when he said he slacked off some from his regime. He died at 96. I had a special affinity for him when I learned that at our peak we were both five-feet, six-inches tall. There, our physical resemblance ended. With his wedge-shaped body and a 52-inch chest, he performed amazing physical feats. At 60, he swam the treacherous waters between San Francisco and Alcatraz Island—handcuffed. Fitness gurus such as LaLanne, Charles Atlas, and Vic Tanny made no impression on me as a young man. I watched a couple of LaLanne’s television www.3rdActMag.com

programs in the 1950s, and I sometimes read the Charles Atlas fitness ads in a comic strip format, and, of course, I heard about Vic Tanny Gyms. But I did not become interested in fitness until the early 1970s when I read Kenneth Cooper’s book, Aerobics. I began an aerobics program and experienced the benefits of regular exercise in a short time, and that sold me on the importance of physical activity. As I ran and cycled through the years, I noticed more and more senior participants from very active to slow and steady. I admired all of them for their determination. I went to extremes, as I tended to do with activities I deemed worthy of interest. I ran a couple of marathons and cycled the 200 miles from Seattle to Portland a few times. I would like to do those things again, but time is precious these days, and, I

have learned that exercise does not have to be extreme to be beneficial. Walking, jogging, and yard work are activities good for the body and the mind. I also learned that time spent on exercise should not cut back the time spent on more important things in life such as God, family, and work, but should be incorporated into a sensible lifestyle. As long as I can shovel snow and jog, I will do so happily. I brush aside the comments that at my age I should not do such vigorous activities. I say if you can move—at any age— move. When you cannot move, it is time to throw in the towel. However, don’t give up until then. I will not. A lifelong Washington resident, Michael Soreng enjoys the outdoor life the state offers. An avid reader of nonfiction, he often writes about his construction experience and time serving in the U.S. Navy. Two of his many stories have been published, while others are destined for his forthcoming autobiography.

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fall 2021

| 3rd Act magazine 19

DO LESS AND MOVE MORE WITH THE FELDENKRAIS METHOD BY W.R. SHAW

Two years ago, I received a flyer

at my office informing me that I was probably getting in and out of chairs the wrong way. The ad offered an inexpensive class in something called the Feldenkrais Method, or “Awareness Through Movement,” that promised to teach me to move more efficiently and to do everyday things with less effort. Although I’m quite active, an old back injury and a recent leg injury were cramping my style, and I was intrigued. A week later, lying on a blanket while an instructor explained that this class was about doing less and making the movement lazy, I was skeptical. I was also in pain. For the last 20 years, three herniated disks at the base of my spine had made it painful to lie on a solid surface. The scientist in me was a little worried that there might be what I thought of as a “woowoo” element to the practice— some kind of magical thinking.

3rd Act magazine | fall 2021

But I was determined to give it a fair trial. By the third lesson, the back pain that had dogged me for two decades had faded to barely noticeable discomfort. I was hooked. As for my concern about the “woowoo factor,” a little research quickly dispelled that notion. There is nothing mystical about the Feldenkrais Method. Its creator, Moshe Feldenkrais, held degrees in physical and electrical engineering as well as physics. He was also an expert in the martial arts. He was fascinated by the intersection of these fields—the mechanics of the movement of the human body. This fascination led to his “Awareness Through Movement” technique, which combines gentle, mindful movements with focused, playful

experimentation designed to release muscle tension, increase joint mobility, and eliminate habitual, dysfunctional patterns of movement.

What to Expect If you’ve taken other exercise classes, you’ll notice right away that the language of Feldenkrais is different. Feldenkrais instructors don’t give orders. Instead, they invite students to explore a movement to the extent that is comfortable for them. They use phrases like, “Begin to think about how you might…” and admonish students not to push the movement past the point of comfort. In fact, the Feldenkrais Method holds that if you can’t do the movement at all, simply imagining it at first may help the brain to figure out how to organize it. Be ready to do a lot of thinking when you walk into a Feldenkrais lesson. Awareness Through Movement is as much about the awareness as it www.3rdActMag.com

is about the movement. What changes in the lower back when you move your leg in this way? Where does the movement initiate? Is it easier on the left or the right? Most lessons end with a return to the first movement in the lesson, to see what has changed over the course of the session. First time students are often startled to find that their range of motion has increased quite dramatically. The stand-alone nature of Feldenkrais lessons, coupled with the focus on not pushing limits makes it a more accessible practice than yoga or martial arts. No matter your fitness level Feldenkrais meets you where you are. There are plenty of active lessons to challenge adventurous students, but also hundreds of lessons that can be done while seated in a chair or standing.

The Benefits In the short term, the Feldenkrais Method will give you a collection of movements that serve as a sort of personalized medicine chest. Instead of immediately reaching for aspirin for a sore back or shoulder, you may spend 10 minutes playing with part of a Feldenkrais lesson targeting the area. As for the long-term benefits, my Feldenkrais instructor often expresses frustration at the number of people who have unnecessary hip or knee replacements that could be avoided by regularly practicing simple, gentle movements to keep those joints moving smoothly. The awareness of

Basic Movements to Get You Started Read carefully before moving on to the movements: • Each of these movements should be very small—only an inch or two—and performed very slowly, with full attention to the experience. What does your shoulder blade do? Where can you feel traces of the movement? • Repeat one movement three times, then rest completely before moving on to the next movement. • If you experience any discomfort with the movement, make the movement smaller, or simply think your way through the movement without actually performing it.

how we move, and how our bodies are stacked up in space, also naturally increases balance, making falls less likely. Still, people of all ages do fall, and one of the areas the Feldenkrais Method focuses on is how to fall safely and how to get yourself up from the ground. Finally, there is an undeniable element of fun in the method. Babies learn to crawl, stand, and walk by playful experimentation. Feldenkrais brings this spirit of playfulness back into movement. Sure, I can get out of bed by sitting on the edge of the bed and standing up, but sometimes, just for fun, I use one of the Feldenkrais rolling-over lessons, crossing one leg over my body, allowing the weight of that leg to pull the rest of my body over so that my foot lands on the floor, and suddenly I’m standing. Sometimes I’ll use the lesson where we learned to use the weight of both legs to pop up effortlessly from lying down to sitting. I don’t have any problem getting up from the floor, but sometimes it’s just more fun to use the Feldenkrais “spiraling up” method. Do I look silly? Maybe. But maybe, one day I’ll take a fall on a patch of ice and, instead of lying there hoping to be rescued, I’ll roll myself over, pop up to sitting and spiral up to my feet. And that is the genius of the Feldenkrais Method. It’s all fun and games, until you need it. W. R. Shaw lives and writes in the Pacific NW. When she’s not writing, she’s often found rescuing rattlesnakes from yards and rural highways.

and then lowering it in one smooth movement, then return to the neutral position. • Move the right shoulder slightly backward, then return to the neutral position. • Move the right shoulder slightly forward, then return to the neutral position. • Combine these two movements, shifting the shoulder slightly back and then forward in one smooth movement, then return to the neutral position. • Here’s the tricky part: Combine all four movements, moving the shoulder through a small circle—up, forward, down, back, and then return to the neutral position.

The Movements:

• Try reversing the circle. Which one is easier?

• Sitting in a comfortable posture, slowly raise the right shoulder, then return to the neutral position.

• Repeat these movements with the left shoulder, noting whether you find it easier, harder or the same.

• Slowly lower the right shoulder, then return to the neutral position.

• While resting, consider: Do you feel any difference between the left and right shoulders? Is one higher than the other? More relaxed? There’s no right answer.

• Combine these movements, slowly raising the shoulder

Aging with Confidence

fall 2021

| 3rd Act magazine 21

ENLIGHTENED AGING

The Benefits of Slow Medicine

How to guard against overdiagnosis and overtreatment BY DR. ERIC B. LARSON

We often associate high-quality health care with speed and sophisticated medical technology— elements that have certainly proven crucial during the COVID-19 pandemic. Quick testing and high-tech interventions can save lives for patients fighting the deadly virus. But now that COVID is waning in many U.S. communities, we also need to remember the benefits of a different kind of care that’s gained favor in recent years: “slow medicine.” Popularized by writers such as Victoria Sweet, MD, (Slow Medicine: The Way to Healing) and Dennis McCullough, MD, (My Mother, Your Mother: Embracing Slow Medicine), this approach promotes better shared communication and sufficient time and observation over time to meet patient needs, while preventing the overuse of technologies that don’t bring value. Slow medicine can be good for all ages, but it’s especially suitable for older patients who are at high risk for harm due to overdiagnosis and overtreatment. It allows us to avoid “medicalizing” normal changes of aging—that is, misinterpreting normal aging as diseases that require medical attention. Examples include decreased levels of estrogen in women following menopause, or lower levels of testosterone in men as they age. Perceiving these and other age-related conditions as problems that need to be “cured” can lead to unwarranted and sometimes harmful overtreatment.

3rd Act magazine | fall 2021

Some have described such forms of medicalization as “disease mongering,” extending the boundaries of illness to expand markets for new products. Such marketing manipulates our culture’s fears of aging and its obsession with staying forever young. People who fall prey not only waste money on ineffective measures; they may also suffer from unnecessary medical treatments that have risky side effects. While slow medicine represents the antithesis of medicalization, it doesn’t mean ignoring symptoms you may find troublesome. It makes sense to talk with your health care team about changes that worry you. Doing so allows them to help you manage minor issues while ruling out medical problems that really can benefit from more intensive treatment. It’s also important to work closely with your health care team to manage chronic conditions such as osteoarthritis and high blood pressure. Ideally, this involves asking questions and even “pushing back” if you feel you’re getting too much medicine or too much intervention. And, of course, this requires providers who don’t feel the need to always take fast action toward ever more care leading to overdiagnosis and overtreatment. Those who practice slow medicine also typically try to keep elderly patients out of hospitals and emergency departments whenever possible, recognizing that an inpatient stay—with all its unfamiliarity and disruptions in daily routines—can be highly stressful. In fact, our research revealed that hospitalization can increase an elderly person’s risk for dementia. Telemedicine, on the other hand, is proving to be a real boon to older patients and their providers. Recent surveys have shown that providing “remote” care to patients in their homes via phone, Zoom, or online chats—a practice made necessary by the social distancing during COVID—is actually quite compatible with “slow medicine,” especially when it allows watchful waiting, the so-called “tincture of time.” Indeed, many older patients and their doctors now report high satisfaction with the quality and convenience of their “remote” visits and look forward to seeing them continue. Bottom line? Let’s all learn from the COVID era: There’s a time for fast and slow medicine. Dr. Eric B. Larson is a senior scientist at Kaiser Permanente Washington and author of Enlightened Aging: Building Resilience for a Long, Active Life (Rowman & Littlefield, 2017).

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Perhaps it was the almost unending threat of contracting COVID-19, or maybe because I had just turned 67 with my wife close behind at 66, but the two of us decided it was time to write our wills. “This’ll be easy,” I thought. And to some extent it was. If I died, she got everything, the reverse being true as well. And if we both unexpectedly exited this world for the next at the same time, our kids would each get half. There. That’s done. But then, things got difficult. What to do with our earthly remains? For my wife, the decision had been made years before she met me. She wanted a traditional casket and funeral, interred near her parents where they resided, a cemetery in a suburb of Chicago. Aside from which music to play, a task which consumed the better part of three days (she decided upon What a Wonderful World by Louis Armstrong) the decision of how to repose on her final doze was easy. Myself, on the other hand … not so much. I had always planned on being cremated and having my ashes dumped in the ocean off the coast of San Diego’s Del Mar. This was how my parents had exited and I wished to follow their lead. The only difference would be that in their

3rd Act magazine | fall 2021

Making a will was easy. But deciding about my earthly remains, well…

case, we chartered boats. Too expensive and not at all like me, I told my kin. Just paddle my ashes out on a boogie board and heave-ho. But now as I prepared to formally make my preferences known, I discovered something BY DAVE BACHMANN that put a bit of a damper on my plans. Namely, it’s illegal. Yep, according to the federal Clean Water Act, ashes must be spread three nautical miles from shore. And while I didn’t know how far a nautical mile was, I was pretty sure it was further than you could paddle on a boogie board. Which got me to thinking: How many legal ways are there to depose of one’s remains? Quite a few, I discovered. And some of them are pretty cool. On the esoteric side, you can have a vial of your ashes shot into space for $2,500. But if you want them to stay up, you’ll have to pay a little more, otherwise they’ll be coming back as a shooting star. You can have your ashes transformed into a living reef, complete with bronze plaque and GPS location. You can

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have artistic renderings of your loved ones in the forms of tattoos where the ink is mixed with the ashes, jewelry and stained glass, and even a company that will transform your incinerated remains into a vinyl recording so you can be “knock, knock, knockin’ on heaven’s door” for time immemorial. Opposed to the whole ashes to ashes thing? If you’re the seafaring sort, you can be buried at sea. Yes, all of you, as long as you’re far enough offshore and in deep enough water. Fond of gardening? How about a little composting for your recompose? And for those of you desiring to reduce your carbon footprint—along with the rest of you—there are green options such as a “natural” burial, which sounds a whole lot like what they did in the olden times. Green burial is safe and legal, uses biodegradable materials, and does not involve embalming. Green burial can only be done in approved areas specific for this purpose, so forget about parking your eternal self next to Spot in the backyard. Of course, you could always opt for something exotic like aerial burial, common in Tibet. I’ll refrain from going into the specifics, but let’s just say it involves the enthusiastic participation of vultures. Enough said.

Interestingly, a study conducted in 2020 by insurance company Choice Mutual found that 35% of their respondents planned on a traditional burial, with 44% opting for cremation. That leaves 21% undecided. Hmmm, wonder what they’re planning? It might be something that, while it’s illegal, is not all that uncommon, namely having one’s ashes spread at Disneyland. Apparently, the Haunted House, Pirates of the Caribbean, and It’s a Small World are the most popular destinations and, in fact, so common that Disney has a special code it invokes called “HEPA cleanup” that involves the vacuuming up of said scattered ashes. Yo-ho, yo-ho, a Hoover’s life for me. As for myself, I have resolved to donate my body to science, in part to atone for the numerous times I cheated on Biology and Chemistry tests in high school. That, and the fact that it’s free. And when they’re done, they’ll actually return my cremated remains to my descendants. What a deal. And in my will (hint-hint) I might make mention to my offspring of what a huge fan I am of Mr. Toad’s Wild Ride. Just saying. Dave Bachmann taught English to special needs children in Arizona for 39 years. He currently lives in California with his wife and 14-year-old lab, writing stories, articles, and poems for children and grown-ups.

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LIVING WITH DEMENTIA AND A ROOMMATE With the right match, having a roommate can enrich life and reduce loneliness by Ed Taylor

3rd Act magazine | fall 2021

In 2010, my grandmother’s journey with dementia had reached a point where we needed to find another option for her care. We had done our best to keep her at home as long as possible: We remodeled the house to make getting around easier, hired inhome care providers, taken many trips to the emergency room, and generally came to expect the unexpected. The day arrived when our efforts were no longer practical or providing any of us, especially my grandmother, with what she really needed to live her best life. We needed real help. We needed a professional memory care community. After what felt like endless research and tours, we found a wonderful community, and made the challenging decision to move her to her new

home. Things were going relatively well after the emotional settling in period, which was harder on us than on her. The only thing that bothered us with her new community was the rotating roommates who came and went. Her apartment, like most memory care communities, was set up for two residents to occupy. When we came to visit, we never knew who her roommate would be. Some were wonderful, and others were a bit more challenging and not a good fit. This was our first experience with memory care, and we assumed this was normal and hoped for the best. Then one day everything changed— an angel-roommate arrived by the name of Virginia! My grandmother, Winona, and her new best friend Virginia were like two peas in a pod. Their personalities were made for each other. They spent their days dining together, enjoying various activities in the community, and our families got to know each other. When

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we visited, it was with both lovely ladies, and I knew Virginia's family did the same. We came to realize, when executed properly, the memory care experience can enrich life and engage people where they are on their journey. The benefits of companionship living within memory care added benefits we never expected. Dementia can be an isolating experience, and many people struggle to remain connected to loved ones. Sharing a living space with another person can go a long way toward drastically reducing the feeling of isolation and loneliness, and promote physical and mental health. It can also create a sense of well-being and continued self-esteem. According to the CDC, adults who are socially isolated face a 29% increased risk of heart disease and 32% increased risk of stroke. Loneliness has also been associated with higher rates of depression, anxiety, and suicide. A purpose-built memory care community like Quail Park of West Seattle can offer tremendous peace of mind. The in-depth, roommate matchmaking processes at Quail Park identify personalities that fit well together, and in turn, enrich the memory care experience. In addition to decreasing isolation and increasing engagement, there are many more notable benefits of the right match: Added safety and security as companions can act to help one another during crisis or confusion, easing the transition into a new home and community with new surroundings. Reducing costs as companion suites are often substantially less expensive than private apartments. And companion suites can also provide added purpose for your loved one as they are now part of a team and often feel a sense of responsibility for their partner. Quail Park of West Seattle is currently open—all residents are vaccinated—and following the Safe Start Washington plan for tours and visits. We would love to have you stop by and visit with us.

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My wife makes numbered to-do lists that can bring present and past, wishes, ethics, ideals, and regrets into a convergence that suggests what ought to occur. Her lists remind me of freewriting. A person without academic instruction in writing and its biases might call it doodling, talking to yourself on paper, or brainstorming. Sometimes when her moving finger writes, I think that had Auguste Rodin glimpsed her doing it she might have inspired a creation he’d call “Woman Dreaming,” which my mind displays beside his “Praying Hands.” At the breakfast table before she awakens, I find her latest list. From three feet away, the grace of her writing stands out. The nuns taught her cursive so well, her notes remind me of copies of the Declaration of Independence, the fluid clarity of Jefferson, Dunlap, or whoever the scrivener was. It’s like

3rd Act magazine | fall 2021

Dream Catching BY BILL VERNON

Chinese calligraphy. In contrast, her canvases are anything handy: used envelopes, the blank side of printed paper, a page ripped from spiral binding, the margin beside newspaper articles, or sheets from pads that groups seeking donations send us. Since last year such pleas fill a 12x16x5-inch cardboard box with these pads, more requests for help than usual, though pandemic conditions may have skewed my judgments on that. While I eat toast, my wife’s notes inspire such thoughts until I see an item in all caps: “CLEAN BATHROOM

DRAINS SINK AND TUB.” Damn. I

imagine her loud insistence convincing me to ransack the shed for a snake and plunger to clear off the smell and rot of forgotten things from our past. If I threw away this list, maybe she’d forget the drain work. I don’t trash the list only because the next entry is, “Send George Money.” Whoa now. I’d better ask about that. Giving money to relatives is touchy. For one thing, the main reason the mail brings us list pads from so many groups is that we give a little, though nothing to brag about, but then those recipients share our name and address with other charities. Our bank account has limits. A second thing is that relatives in George’s condition— meaning age range—sometime get too generous. Grandma Vernon comes to mind. Evangelical television broadcasts convinced her to tithe, then send even www.3rdActMag.com

more. Her small pension was hardly enough to feed her and pay utility bills. Aunt Bette and Uncle Buster had to go to court, become guardians, and take charge of her income to save her. My wife’s lists are maps that lead her daily from get-up to go-back-down. When the grandkids show up for her cookies, she sometimes diverts their energy from fun into labor, completing items on her lists appropriate to her workers’ ability: dusting, vacuuming, washing dishes, preparing foods, pulling weeds, sowing seeds, unpacking and displaying decorations for an approaching holiday, or packing and storing decorations after one’s passage. Unfortunately, her volunteers are not qualified to unclog drains. They prefer tamping wooden dowels into the hard ground until the little flags on them surround our front yard, stars and stripes waving in the hot breezes, giving chiggers a meal, unnecessarily announcing Independence Day two weeks ahead of time. Displaying flags this way does remind me that, as they say, we are all in this together. Lists seem to give my wife purpose and hope. Similarly, levels of institutions and government fill the airways with their own “lists,” and though much of the content is iffy, these messages suggest that social order remains. The lists, I think, are possibilities, but also wishful thinking. The lists I make are more like the Native American dreamcatchers. My lists cast nets of woven-together-words, hoping to catch something worthwhile, something worth sharing. Boxes and bins full of symbols help me handle confusion and uncertainties, the present and the future.

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Retired college teacher Bill Vernon has reminisced in print about the values and follies of golfing, running, canoe racing, playing baseball or basketball, fishing, piano playing, hunting, international folk dancing, and hiking. He’s still active in some of these things. Vernon’s writing appears mostly in literary journals.

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Rock On

LeRoy Bell

is having the time of his life (and taking his friends along for the ride) BY JULIE FANSELOW PHOTOGRAPHS BY ERNIE SAPIRO

3rd Act magazine | fall 2021

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As a young man, he wrote hit songs for The

Temptations and Elton John. At 60, he was a finalist on TV’s The X Factor. Now 70, he is collaborating with a longtime Saturday Night Live band leader. LeRoy Bell may not be as recognizable as fellow Seattle-area musicians Eddie Vedder, Dave Matthews, or Brandi Carlile. But for decades, he has blended passion and purpose into a successful life doing what he loves best. The pandemic upended all our lives, and the disruption came at an especially bad time for Bell. He had just forged a new partnership with G.E. Smith, a noted session guitarist and SNL veteran who had spent his entire career looking for a vocalist as good as the singers he had backed over the years, including Bob Dylan, Daryl Hall, and David Bowie. “I wanted to have a singer like that in my band,” Smith told American Songwriter magazine last year. “LeRoy is that singer.” The duo recorded an album, Stony Hill, and were set to play the March 2020 South by Southwest music festival in Austin, followed by a tour. Then the pandemic abruptly silenced live music. Like most musicians, Bell played some online shows during the forced hiatus, but that couldn’t take the place of performing in a venue before a live audience. When the pandemic finally started to recede and the red velvet curtain rose at Seattle’s Triple Door last June, LeRoy Bell and His Only Friends were the first musicians to take the club’s stage in 15 months. “It’s like the first day back at school,” Bell joked to the appreciative crowd, noting how they all felt some nervousness after so much time in isolation. Yet, it didn’t take long before Bell and his current lineup (longtime collaborator Terry Morgan on bass, former Heart drummer Ben Smith, and lead guitarist Jason Cameron) found their groove as the audience got up to dance and sing along. “It all came back, just like riding a bicycle,” says Bell, who lives in Edmonds. “I don’t think anybody realized how much we really missed each other, how much we need each other, how much we feed off of each other.”

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The oldest of six children in a military family, Bell was born in Florida and grew up mostly in Germany. His dad, an Army sergeant who sold cars on the side, wanted Bell to become a dentist. “He was never 100 percent behind me trying to make a living playing music,” Bell recalls. But the young Bell had a champion in his uncle, Thom Bell, an architect of the Philadelphia soul scene of the 1960s and ’70s. “He got me started writing for a lot of people like the Spinners and the O’Jays and the Temptations,” remembers Bell. “I hung out with him in the studio, and I learned a lot from him.” Bell went on to record with his friend Casey James, and the duo reached #15 on the Billboard Hot 100 in 1979 with their song, “Livin’ It Up (Friday Night).” With a back catalog of songs that likely numbers in the thousands by now, Bell will sometimes grab a guitar and start playing to conjure memories of how a certain song came to be. Songs like “Jaded” (“my eyes have seen too much”) speak to the despair that convinced Bell to stop watching television a few years ago, and last year’s “America”—a centerpiece of his album

“

When the pandemic finally started to recede and the red velvet curtain rose at Seattle’s Triple Door last June, LeRoy Bell and His Only Friends were the first musicians to take the club’s stage in 15 months.

”

with Smith—is a soul-wrenching look at a nation betraying its promise. Yet even at his most critical, Bell infuses his work with hope. “One of the threads in my music is, ‘there’s a way out of this’ … that even though I might criticize what’s going on, I’m always hopeful that as the human race, we can get better,” he says. (CONTINUED ON NEXT PAGE)

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“

I’m doing what I love to do. I’d rather do that than work 9-to-5 doing something just to make money and not be enjoying life.

Of course, love in all its manifestations is the way that we might reach that better place. Many people in the Puget Sound region probably first heard Bell via “Dream of Peace,” an anthemic song of fatherly love that he wrote for the 2005 Christmas in the Northwest compilation album released to benefit Seattle Children’s Hospital. And at the Triple Door show, Bell and the band gleefully served up “Everything About You,” an infectious song that proves that none of us is ever too old for a crush. (“I wish I knew the future, of how it’s going to be, so I could bump into you accidentally on the street,” he sang.) Although Bell turned 70 in August, retirement is not on his radar. He’s playing some of the best music of his life with old friends and new ones, and he doesn’t take that for granted. Bell tells how, a few years ago, sitting in his hotel room after playing a blues festival, he was inspired to write a song that he often uncorks at the end of a show these days. “If I Should Die Tonight” is a response, decades later,

3rd Act magazine | fall 2021

”

to a father’s disbelief that his son could make it as a musician. “Even if I don’t have that much money, as long as I am making music with my friends—if I die tonight, if I die on the stage—then that’s OK,” he says. “It’s all good because I’m doing what I love to do. I’d rather do that than work 9-to-5 doing something just to make money and not be enjoying life. …I feel very, very lucky that I chose this road, even though it wasn’t always easy.” Bell recalls that he was “really kind of freaked out about turning 50” two decades ago. “We get so caught up in what society says is your age and what you should be doing at that age,” he says, adding that he has learned to cast those expectations aside. By coming back from a year on the sidelines to play every night like it could be his last, LeRoy Bell sounds like he is just getting started. A frequent contributor to 3rd Act, Julie Fanselow used to play bass and sing in an Ohio garage band, and she wrote this article under the influence of a blossoming summer crush. She lives in Seattle.

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Got

Purpose? HAVING A SENSE OF PURPOSE LEADS TO BETTER HEALTH AND MORE LONGEVITY. ARE WE RISKING OUR LIVES IF WE DON’T KNOW OURS? BY SALLY FOX

ll the good press about the power of purpose has left many of us feeling anxious if we don’t know or can’t articulate ours. What we love and feel passionate about may feel selfish or not significant enough to qualify as a “real purpose.” To all of my purpose-doubting friends, I offer this: Relax. You know far more about what brings you meaning than you think you do. Here’s an example from a conversation I’ve had, many times, with my husband: He begins, “I don’t feel like I’m making a

3rd Act magazine | fall 2021

difference” (aka, “I’m not connected to a sense of larger purpose.”) I ask, “But you love cars and have always loved cars.” He says, “Yes.” “And you’re always supporting friends with their car questions. They’re so grateful, which seems to also make you happy.” “Yes, but what is that doing for the world?” Aha! That’s it: Nobility syndrome. Having a passion for cars and helping people doesn’t sound big enough or life-changing enough, even though it’s the work that he loves to do. Another friend feels befuddled because she cares about so many things and has so many passions that she agonizes which one is the purpose for her month, year or life. With all the media blitz about life purpose, the word’s becoming a commodity, a thing everyone needs to acquire. Search Amazon and you’ll find

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more than 8,000 titles on finding your purpose. Search on Google and, in under one second, you’ll come up with more than a million entries. If you want some questions to ask yourself, read one of those books. Or scan YouTube for relevant talks. But don’t feel pressed to come up with answers. I remember searching for my life’s purpose in my 30s at a weekend transformational seminar. For two days I was challenged to break through my old ways of thinking. Then, on Sunday afternoon, I stood before 10 0 par ticipant s, hear t thumping, and announced how I’d discovered the meaning of life and found my purpose. I enjoyed a moment of thunderous applause. By the following morning, however,

my life-changing insight had started “What is the world asking of me?” “How to fade. It probably dove back into do I feel called to help others?” “Where the deep sea from whence it came. can I contribute?” “What issues most Because that’s where our deepest concern me?” sense of meaning lies, hidden within If we’ve spent most of our time our souls. Today, I don’t need to find giving to others, however, our purpose a set of purpose-filled words that I might be to give to ourselves, and if can laminate and hang on the wall. For that’s where your heart calls you, go for me, a true purpose needs to stay alive it. Maybe you want to explore a passion and evolving. I liken it to a porpoise. It project, such as taking up painting. Or swims around, under the surface of life, travel. Or spend more time nurturing playing and exploring. Only rarely does an inner sense of peace. Just because it surface where it can be seen. It needs your purpose is self-care or focused on space to move and grow, and doesn’t you doesn’t make it less meaningful. want to be caged or framed. We can also gain from having a biteWhy can’t we turn purpose into a sized, everyday sense of purpose. Life verb rather than a noun that represents is a day-by-day adventure, and we can something we’re supposed to know? all use inspiration to get out of bed We could be “purposing” throughout and view each day as ours to create. our lives (sorry, English lovers), asking Research suggests that taking care questions like, “How do I experience of another being, be it a houseplant, my calling, now?” or “What am I meant a senior dog, or a parakeet, may be to do today?” or “What do I continue enough to bring meaning to our lives. to love?” Recently, my daily goal on my sister’s Purposing would keep us constantly birthday was to help her celebrate. pointed toward a meaning-filled life. Nothing more needed. We may benefit from different Even if we are following a large kinds of purposes at various points in calling, finding an everyday purpose our lives. The researchers who linked brings this down from the stratospheric purpose to longevity didn’t define the into the zone of daily action. My big type of purpose, big goal of “helping people or small, that leads to TO ALL OF MY live more creatively as a longer, healthier life. they age” won’t get PURPOSESometimes we me out of bed. But DOUBTING FRIENDS, may feel called to a knowing, “I want to significant, altruistic I OFFER THIS: edit one chapter of purpose, such as a my book today” does. RELAX. YOU KNOW desire to change the (After “get a cup of world. We may want FAR MORE ABOUT tea,” which is always to end world hunger, WHAT BRINGS YOU my first goal of the save the whales, help morning.) MEANING THAN local refugees, heal We may have a YOU THINK YOU DO. lymphoma, or protect purpose given to us, fair elections. Altruism one we didn’t choose, and a desire to give back can inspire us, but which chose us. We are called especially at a stage of life when we to help a partner, friend, or child go have more time to give. We search for through an illness or difficult time. these big purposes with questions like, Although we didn’t ask for the job, we (CONTINUED ON NEXT PAGE)

Aging with Confidence

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Got Purpose? (CONTINUED FROM PREVIOUS PAGE)

know it’s ours to do, and that sense of knowing gives meaning to our lives. Hopefully, the situation will pass, so we can pursue a passion project of our choosing. Finally, there’s the deep purpose, the one we can’t articulate, like a porpoise living under the surface of the waters. Your soul knows why you are here. Unfortunately, the soul has a limited vocabulary and may never provide you that information in

language. You may feel it, from time to to what we don’t yet know. Always time, during the moments when your knowing puts us at risk of staying heart beats fast or swells with joy, and stuck in the safety of the past. you know, for an instant, “This is why Let’s treat our purpose like a verb I am here.” Staying open to wonder and give it room to breathe. Enjoy helps connect us with our feelings of your path as the meaning-seeking deeper purpose. being you are and Trouble is, when we HOWEVER YOU listen to your heart. put that purpose into FIND MEANING IN That alone may be language, it often comes your best ticket to YOUR LIFE IS THE out in words that sound longevity. RIGHT WAY FOR trite, too general, or like Or try the way a greeting card. “To bring YOU. TRUST of the porpoise. more love into the world” Find your wisdom YOURSELF, YOUR is a beautiful purpose, in the depths, but if saying it sounds HEART, AND THE enjoy swimming, like trivializing it, feel free WHISPERS THAT changing directions, to hold it privately in your and playing. Then COME TO YOU. heart. surface occasionally However you find meaning in your and share the truth you’ve found. life is the right way for you. Trust Sally Fox is a coach, speaker, podcaster, and yourself, your heart, and the whispers owner of Engaging Presence, a firm that helps individuals and organizations develop and that come to you. Keep the questions share their best brand stories. She is currently alive. If we fully knew all that we were working on a book about finding your creative work in the third act of life. Find her blog at about, where would we find mystery? engagingpresence.com and listen to her Living our questions keeps us open podcasts at 3rd ActMagazine.com.

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JerilynBrusseauchanneledgrief intoa lifelivedwithpurpose BYANNHEDREEN

TURNINGBOMBSINTOTREES In January 2020, Jerilyn Brusseau traveled to Vietnam to begin a year of celebration. That year marked the 25th anniversary of an event that changed her life with the normalization of relations between the United States and Vietnam. Ever since her brother, Lt. Daniel Cheney, was shot down over Vietnam in 1969, Brusseau had known she needed to find a way, someday, to transform not just her own grief but also the grief of every bereaved family on both sides of the Vietnam War. And 1995 was the year she realized it might finally be possible. Brusseau and her late husband Danaan Parry were among the first American civilians to arrive in Vietnam after

3rd Act magazine | fall 2021

diplomatic relations were restored. On that January 1996 trip, they took their first steps toward founding PeaceTrees Vietnam, an organization with a straightforward, though perilous, mission—to remove unexploded bombs, landmines, and other ordnance from the Vietnamese countryside, and to plant trees in their stead. In its first quarter century, PeaceTrees Vietnam has cleared unexploded ordnance from 1,500 acres and planted more than 50,000 trees. PeaceTrees has also built houses, founded 19 kindergartens, awarded scholarships, and assisted Vietnamese farmers with microloans and business relationships, including supplying Costco with black pepper.

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That celebratory trip in January 2020 was “like a giant family reunion,” says Brusseau. The highlight was a dinner honoring more than 80 Vietnamese friends, partners, and current and former staff. At the time, no one could have foreseen that a pandemic would cancel all further PeaceTrees trips through 2021. (Brusseau, who normally travels to Vietnam two to three times a year, is hoping to return in early 2022.) Instead, an October 2020 online forum celebrated the work of PeaceTrees, bringing together, virtually, speakers from the United States and Vietnam. The moderator, former Washington Governor and Ambassador to China Gary Locke, asked panelists why Vietnam has been so open to building relationships with Americans in general and PeaceTrees Vietnam in particular. Nguyen Phuong Nga, chair of the Union of Vietnamese Friendship Organizations, explained that “the Vietnamese people are a peace-loving nation. Generosity and forgiveness are in our DNA. We do not forget, but we are able to forgive. We do not want to live with hatred and animosity. PeaceTrees Vietnam has not only healed the land, it has healed the soul.” This year, the AARP awarded Brusseau its Purpose Prize, given annually to people over 50 who are “using their knowledge and life experience to solve tough social problems.” Brusseau, who is 78, says her unwavering sense of purpose was born in the terrible moment when she learned of her brother’s death. “Suddenly in that very instant I realized there were hundreds of thousands of

Vietnamese families on the other side of the horizon who were losing their sons and daughters and moms and dads. I realized in that instant, someday, somehow, some way, we must find a way to reach out to the Vietnamese people to begin to build a bridge, to honor their losses as well as our own and begin to build trust and understanding. To go underneath, this word came to me, to go underneath the pathos of war. To connect there in the depths of the pain of loss and tragedy and begin to create small steps forward and of course I didn’t know how or when, I only knew that we absolutely must.” Ann Hedreen is an author, teacher of memoir writing, and filmmaker. Hedreen and her husband, Rustin Thompson, own White Noise Productions, and have made more than 150 short films and several feature documentaries together, including Quick Brown Fox: An Alzheimer’s Story. She recently completed a second memoir, After Ecstasy: Memoir of an Observant Doubter.

Clockwise from the top: Jerilyn Brusseau helps plant the first tree; Brusseau’s mother, Rae Cheney, shares a moment with a Vietnamese Gold Star mother who also lost her son; PeaceTree deminers; Lt. Daniel Cheney, Brusseau’s brother, was shot down and died in Vietnam. Photos courtesy PeaceTrees Vietnam

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Rolling with the Changes COVID upended a dream of teaching English abroad. Instead, the world came to me By Julie Fanselow In February 2020, I traveled to Mexico to take an intensive four-week course in teaching English. I did it both as a sabbatical from my long career as a freelance writer and editor and as a possible entrée into a retirement career I could take abroad. But mostly, I relished the challenge of being in a classroom for the first time in decades, both as a student—at 58, I was the oldest person in the class by nearly 20 years—and as a teacher. It was a rewarding experience, even if I was unsure whether or how I’d use the teaching certificate. My days in Guadalajara were filled with lesson planning and student teaching; my evenings were often spent online surveying the wide

3rd Act magazine | fall 2021

array of English teaching jobs around the globe. Maybe I’d apply to be a conversation assistant in Spain, where native English speakers work about 15 hours a week in the public schools, leaving plenty of time for travel. Perhaps I’d join the Peace Corps, or work my way around the world teaching informal “coffee shop English.” But as the course neared its conclusion, my options became clouded by the specter of a strange new virus, its impact becoming more dire by the day. I arrived back in Seattle on March 1, 2020, feeling very much at loose ends. A few days later, I attended a volunteer orientation at Literacy Source, a hub of English language

and citizenship classes in Seattle’s Lake City neighborhood. I was intrigued, but I decided not to apply, wanting to keep my travel options open. Although it had become clear by mid-March that no one would be traveling anywhere for a while, many of us hoped that the pandemic would be contained by summer, maybe fall. Yet, as 2020 wound down and international travel prospects remained murky, I finally decided to volunteer as an assistant teacher in Literacy Source’s morning conversation class held twice a week on Zoom. As I write this, I’ve just wrapped up my second quarter of volunteering, and I plan to return later this year

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after meeting a book deadline and doing some fall travel. Together with lead teacher Cynthia Putnam, we volunteers help people learn to navigate life in Seattle and the United States via wide-ranging small group conversations about food, recycling, transit, current events, holidays and celebrations, sports and hobbies, you name it. There’s often a lot of laughter as we explain such idioms as “pig out” and “doggie bag,” and sometimes there is serious reflection as we consider questions like, “Which would you rather have: more money or more time?” Some of our students have been in Seattle for decades, working hard in jobs that we now know are essential, including food service and home health. Many left countries that are beset by war, poverty, and corruption; some were highly successful in their homelands, but they’re starting over here. All are seeking their own version of the American dream, and it feels like a privilege to play some small part in helping them pursue it, all while improving my teaching skills and learning a bit more about the world.

Resilience is an asset at every age and in every stage of life. While working on this essay, I heard a podcast interview with Dr. Katalin Karikó who—as a girl in Hungary—became fascinated with the potential of the Messenger RNA (mRNA) molecule. Karikó and her husband and daughter immigrated to the United States in 1985 so Karikó could continue her research into mNRA. Long story short: After decades of disappointment and

Aging with Confidence

obscurity, Karikó eventually helped developed the Pfizer-BioNTech vaccine against COVID. As I heard Karikó tell her tale in still-heavily accented English, I thought about how one of my students may someday change the world. Even if that never happens, I know they are changing their lives—and our communities—for the better.

We all put plans and dreams aside when the pandemic hit and we also learned to pivot, recalibrate, and reassess. Of course, the experience I’ve detailed here is not unique. We all put plans and dreams aside when the pandemic hit and we also learned to pivot, recalibrate, and reassess. As older folks, we were already good at that, and the past year-and-a-half made us even more skilled at rising to meet whatever circumstances life throws at us. Resilience is an asset at every age and in every stage of life. As for my future as an English teacher, I have discovered that, for now, I am content to use my skills right in my neighborhood. I live just a few blocks from the Literacy Source headquarters and I am eager to volunteer for in-person classes when they resume this fall. Who knows? A few years from now, maybe I’ll teach English in Baja or Budapest, or perhaps I’ll still be volunteering with Literacy Source here in Seattle. More will be revealed, and meanwhile, I have no regrets. Julie Fanselow is a writer in Seattle and a frequent contributor to 3rd Act. Read more from her at surelyjoy.com.

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| 3rd Act magazine 41

our inner ageist

bout a decade ago, at age 60, I had a rude awakening. A frail older woman sat next to me in a restaurant, and I noticed her tattered clothes and dirty hands. She ordered free samples and I felt uncomfortable. My inner dialogue went like this: “She shouldn’t be here at my favorite vegan restaurant. It’s so sad, those wrinkles, that frailty, poverty, and neediness. I’ll never be like that.” I was meeting a hidden, unknown part of myself that was attributing to her what I was denying and rejecting in myself—my own loss of youthful vitality and potential dependency, loneliness, and poverty. In fact, I was projecting onto her a dark image of my future self and deeply disliking what I felt. I was shocked by this new awareness, especially because I had worked and rallied against the other “isms” and stereotypes of racism, sexism, classism, and homophobia. Yet, deep in the hidden recesses of my unconscious, ageism—invisible and insidious—persisted in me. In that moment I became aware of “the inner ageist” in myself and dubbed her “the bag lady.” She personifies the fear of losing everything, being unable

3rd Act magazine | fall 2021

How Our Hidden Attitudes and Images of Age Shape Our Actual Experience—and What That Means for the Fight Against Ageism by Dr. Connie Zweig to take care of oneself, and ending up abandoned on the streets. And she led me on an unanticipated journey. With ageism, we project our negative fantasies of “old”—ugly, frail, needy, senile—that leads to condescension and stereotyping: “greedy geezer,” “old bat,” “over the hill,” “out to pasture.” And when millions of young people project what they fear about aging onto elders, the latter try to appear and to act as if they are younger. Hence, the epidemic of

anti-aging marketing, advertising, surgery, and hormone replacement therapy. I didn’t know it at the time, but “the bag lady” is an epidemic image within women in our culture. In 2016, Allianz Life Insurance Company did a survey that found that almost half of women respondents said they sometimes fear losing their money and becoming homeless, regardless of income level. So, I was not alone in carrying this hidden figure. www.3rdActMag.com

This new awareness led me into unknown territory and a radically new purpose. I knew that if I held dark fears beneath conscious awareness, and negative inner images of late life, others did, too. I decided to take a training to become an elder with Sage-ing International, a year-long program that proved to be a perfect fit for me in my late 60s. During this program, I found myself reorienting to the purpose of late life, as well as finding the tools to explore my own meaning for this time. Trained as a depth psychologist to orient to the unconscious mind, I was thrilled to discover the research of Becca Levy, a psychologist at Yale School of Public Health, who has spent her career pioneering research about the unconscious operation of age stereotypes and prejudice. She has revealed how positive and negative beliefs about older people, which she calls age stereotypes, can be embodied inside of us, having profound effects on our mental and physical health. Age stereotypes are internalized during childhood and young adulthood, and embodied when they lead to self-images. They are later reinforced throughout life by repeated exposure to ageist messaging, according to Levy. Eventually, over the years, they become “self-stereotypes,” which I call “the inner ageist.” As a therapist working with elders, I have seen how this process of internalization leads to self-hate and a merciless inner critic (“I’ve become weak, useless, worthless.”) If we assign meaning and value only to our appearance, accomplishments, physical strength, or productive roles, and they become diminished, then the inner ageist can be relentless. Levy’s findings are startling and confirm that ageism, operating beneath conscious awareness, has ripple effects throughout our bodies and minds. She Aging with Confidence

reviewed her findings in The Journals of Gerontology series (July 2003): In 1994, in a study to see whether internalized ageist stereotypes influenced memory in older people, she developed a technique to subliminally prime participants by flashing a word on a screen so that they could see the word but not identify it consciously.

• A 2016 study showed that the influence of the inner ageist extends to actual changes in the brain: People with early negative beliefs about aging had greater loss in their brain’s memory site and more growth of tangles and plaques, the symptoms of Alzheimer’s disease.

With ageism, we project our negative fantasies of “old”—ugly, frail, needy, senile—that leads to condescension and stereotyping. Those exposed to negative stereotypes (“senile”) performed worse on memory tasks than those exposed to positive ones (“wise”). She concluded that, even outside of conscious awareness, these stereotypes can influence cognitive ability. • From 1999–2000, Levy tested whether aging self-stereotypes influenced the will to live. After exposing young and old subjects to positive and negative primes, and hypothetical fatal medical situations, she found that the older individuals exposed to positive stereotypes tended to accept lifeextending interventions, while those who saw negative primes did not. • In 2000, she explored the impact of ageist self-images on cardiovascular reactivity, an autonomic response to stress. Those exposed to negative primes showed higher heart reactivity, indicating physiological stress, although the participants were unaware of this impact. • In 2002, Levy examined whether self-perceptions of aging influence survival. People who had positive beliefs about growing older, as measured 23 years earlier, gained 7 ½ years of life—more than the longevity gained from low blood pressure, low cholesterol, healthy weight, cessation of smoking, and regular exercise.

Levy and her colleagues tested this idea for the transition to retirement. In a study of more than 1,000 older adults, during a 23-year period, they looked at how positive and negative associations with retirement were linked to health. Those who held and embodied positive images about physical health during retirement lived 4.5 years longer than others. Those who held and embodied negative images of mental health during retirement lived 2.5 years less. When I decided to write a book about the inner world of age, the psychological and spiritual promises of aging consciously, as well as the inner obstacles to aging with awareness, my new purpose became official. Now is the time, as thousands of us turn 65 every day, to fight for age equality, to counter negative media portrayals, and to create positive social policies. But Levy’s research shows that activism is not enough: We need to uncover the inner ageist in each of us and root it out so that we can discover the treasures of late life—its freedom, creativity, and opportunities to grow and serve something larger than ourselves. Dr. Connie Zweig recently retired after 30 years as a therapist in Los Angeles. She extends this work into late life with The Inner Work of Age: Shifting from Role to Soul, which explores aging as a spiritual journey. She is a Certified Sage-ing Leader with Sage-ing International and can be reached at conniezweig@gmail.com.

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MIND THE SPIRIT

A Case for

Uncoupling

It’s not just young people who are addicted to their technology BY STEPHEN SINCLAIR

3rd Act magazine | fall 2021

“Oh, no! I forgot my phone!” A couple of weeks ago I said that, out loud and to no one in particular, as I waited at a bus stop. I’d wanted to check the transit app to see when the bus was due so I could text the friend I was meeting at the Pike Place Market to tell him I was running late. With no phone I couldn’t do either of those things. Despite not knowing its ETA, the bus arrived. When I got downtown my friend was there and didn’t seem concerned that I was late. I apologized anyway and told him I didn’t text him because I’d forgotten my phone. As we walked through the market I kept patting the back pocket where I always keep my phone to check to see if it was there. It took me about half an hour to stop that and just accept the fact that I was now electronically disconnected from the world. And you know what? It was wonderful! I was able to relax. Without the intrusion of texts, news alerts, emails, weather reports—all those distractions that for years have forced themselves into my consciousness—I was able to be more present in the moment. I listened more closely to my friend. I took in all the sights, smells, and sounds of Pike Place, and most importantly, I experienced a heightened awareness of myself. Every day when I’m out, I see people looking at their phones while walking down the sidewalk, seemingly unaware of what’s going on around them. I see them sitting in the park, in clinic waiting rooms, or at tables in restaurants, hunched over their smartphones, scrolling through social media feeds, looking at TikTok, or reading emails. They’re not talking to each other. Often, they don’t even seem to conscious of those around them. Without my phone I couldn’t check to see if it was going to rain later that afternoon. I couldn’t Google the answer to any questions I had. I couldn’t check my newsfeed to see what was happening in the world. The only thing that mattered was what I was doing right then and there. After my friend and I had finished shopping and said goodbye, I took the bus back home. When I unlocked my door and stepped into my apartment I immediately saw my phone. It was on the table where I’d left it.

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Contemporary Independent Living Over the next few days I took time to reflect on my relationship to my phone and to the social media platforms to which I subscribe. I realized that I become anxious if I don’t continually check my Facebook and Instagram accounts. My friends and family might think I don’t care about them if I’m not liking their posts or commenting on them. I also realized that sometimes when I see all the things my friends are doing in their lives, I can become dissatisfied with my own. More importantly, as I keep looking outside myself to be filled with news and information, I quit listening to the still small voice within me—the voice of the divine presence. So, I deleted the social media apps from my phone. It took a few days to get used to not knowing what was going on with everyone, but I soon realized that I didn’t need to know. Instead of reaching for my phone, I would sit down, become aware of my breath, and spend time in contemplation. I’ve also begun to not take my phone with me when I’m working in the garden or going for a walk. If someone needs to get hold of me, they can leave a message or text me. It’ll be there when I get home. I know not everyone is able to do this. Perhaps they’re a caretaker for a loved one or are an individual who is socially isolated and needs social media to connect with the outside world. But if you can, why not give it a try. You’ll learn a lot about yourself. And maybe, just maybe, you, too, will hear the voice within you. Stephen Sinclair lives in Seattle’s Capitol Hill neighborhood. Earlier in his life he enjoyed a career in show business while working out of New York and Chicago. A career as an ordained Unitarian Universalist parish minister and a hospital chaplain followed. Most recently, he worked with the homeless and is a weekly volunteer visitor at the Monroe Correctional Complex.

Aging with Confidence

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There’s a Podcast for That! I was seven when the first black and white television Like streaming TV, you can listen to a podcast program appeared at our house. Until then radio was our only anytime on your smartphone or computer. I listen when source of media entertainment providing a steady diet walking, driving, and doing mundane household tasks. of Art Linkletter’s People Are Funny, Hallmark Hall of I enjoy the original programming content produced by Fame anthologies and Roy Rogers crooning “Tumbling the host(s), often without the restrictions of the FCC or Tumbleweeds” from the living room wooden conventions of radio broadcasting. Programs can BY ANN console. TV was a miracle, even on a small be any length of varying frequency covering any RANDALL screen in gradations of black and white. So, when topic. Some feature only the host(s)—think of it friends began talking up their favorite podcasts, as a one-way conversation with your likeable, but I was unconvinced. Why would we, the generation who opinionated, neighbor. Others utilize outside guests— witnessed the audio-to-visual transition, want to reverse Dr. Anthony Fauci was a podcast regular in 2020. Many course? celebrities host their own podcasts, including Alan According to Nielsen, the analytics company known Alda, Ozzy and Sharon Osbourne, Alec Baldwin, RuPaul, for its television ratings, 50 percent of all homes have Shaquille O’Neal, and Martina Navratilova. And many are at least one person who’s a podcast listener, a number produced as a themed series such as targeted to women increasing annually by 20 percent. Since 2014, boomers over 50, true crime, and history. have increased our podcast fandom by nearly 70 percent If you’re a first-time listener, start by selecting a because new technology such as voice-activation podcast listening application. iPhones have a free builtand Bluetooth in our homes and cars make podcast in app (Apple Podcasts) that lets you browse topics by programs easier to find and hear. Last year the uptick category and stream or download programs. Android was more pronounced across all demographics as many phones come with a similar built-in app or you can of us, isolated and homebound, turned to podcasts for download through Google Play. If you subscribe to information and entertainment. Skeptic that I was, it took Amazon’s Audible for audiobooks or Spotify or Pandora a pandemic to convert me. Now, I’m hooked. for music, they also feature podcasts. Or you can simply Convenience and variety were the convincing draws. use your browser to search for topics. With more than two

3rd Act magazine | fall 2021

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Since 2014, boomers have increased our podcast fandom by nearly 70 percent.

How to Start Your Own Podcast I was planning my “Paddle Pilgrim” adventure— kayaking the Mekong River in SE Asia through Laos, Cambodia, and Vietnam—when the pandemic hit. Unable to go, I redirected my adventure spirit and decided to try my hand at podcasting. That’s how I, the “Paddle Pilgrim,” became BY DAVE the “Podcast Pilgrim.” It’s been a ELLINGSON wonderful adventure of learning. For those unfamiliar with podcasting, I like to think of it as my own mini-radio program where I share ideas and interview interesting people. The success of my podcast (measured in number of listeners) surprised me and led to being asked to help others start their own. Here is very simple “how-to” list of steps and suggestions for creating a podcast:

million podcasts and 48 million episodes available, the programming choices are overwhelming, but you’ll eventually find yourself gravitating to topics or hosts that you like. When you find one, subscribe to get the latest episode or episodes in a series. Still unconvinced? Studies show the brain is five times more active when listening to an audio program versus watching television. Listening requires more concentration and use of the imagination, which in turn strengthens brain synapses. Improving your brain health while getting bidet advice at your convenience? That sounds like a winning combination. Here are a few programs that explore aging: Aging Disgracefully with Carolyn Meyer Meyer is a an 80-year-old comedian by trade and as the solo host of her podcast she unabashedly dishes out her experienced advice on everything including the aforementioned bidets, dating younger men, sex ed classes, and buying underwear. Been There Done That Jo Ann Allen, a former news anchor and producer with a 40-year career curates a podcast showcasing real life stories by boomers. Recent podcasts include accounts about accidentally joining the Mob and late-in-life transitioning from male to female.

Podcast topic: Your podcast should be what you are enthused or excited about, a topic that you have experience or expertise in, and will benefit and interest others. I began with reflections on “old sayings, familiar expressions, and adages”—readymade material from my book, Say What? A Fresh Look at Old Sayings. I also started commenting on current events, then later added interviews with interesting people in a series called “Life Journeys.”

Audience: Your audience begins with family, friends, and immediate contacts then grows from there. People you interview can help. I am currently doing a series titled, “The Magic of Music” where I interview musicians about their musical adventures and share great music. Each musician I interview promotes my podcast to their fan-base, building my audience.

Platform: You need a podcast recording “platform.” I use Anchor, a free application that’s easy to use. Tutorials and step-by-step instructions help budding podcasters imagine, write, launch, and market your program. With Anchor your podcast will be available on two major podcast channels: iTunes and Spotify. (CONTINUED ON NEXT PAGE)

(CONTINUED ON NEXT PAGE)

Aging with Confidence

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NPR’s Ira Glass hosts one of the country’s most popular podcasts.

4 5

Equipment: The only equipment you need are a computer or smart phone, and headphones with microphone. That’s it!

Home recording studio: Good sound is crucial. Podcasting is an audio medium. Make sure you record in a quiet room where there is little ambient sound/noise and no distractions. I don’t podcast on Wednesdays because the grandkids are at our house. William loves to try on my headphones…

Script: Writing a simple script translates your thoughts into clear and understandable content and helps manage the length of the program. I started with 15-minute programs and have expanded with interviews running up to 60 minutes. Having a script keeps me “on-topic,” but also allows me to ad-lib when doing an interview. Start simple and short!

NPR’s Growing Bolder Former broadcast journalists Marc Middleton and Bill Shafer interview a broad range of experts, celebrities, and non-celebrities alike on topics related to fearless aging.

That’s Not My Age Billed as a grown-up’s guide to aging, British journalist Alyson Walsh discusses aging, style, and third act careers with a variety of special guests.

This American Life Ira Glass, an NPR staple, transformed his popular series into a Top 10 podcast with 2.4 million people downloading each episode. There are 25 years of episodes in his library.

Practice, practice, practice: You know the story of the person who was lost in NYC and wanted to know how to get to Carnegie Hall. A local told him, “Practice!” While practice will not make you perfect, it will help you gain confidence. Audience: Build your audience by sharing on social media. I use Facebook and Instagram as well as a regular email “newsletter” via Google called FlashIssue. The best days to post on Facebook are Tuesday through Thursday and don’t forget word-of-mouth.

Evaluate your success via the analytics your platform/anchor provides: You can actually know the number, gender, and age of your audience. I also was amazed to discover that I had an international audience.

The bottom line: HAVE FUN! Podcasting can be an adventure where you learn something new and get to share your ideas with others. Dave Ellingson is a Lutheran pastor, master gardener, former distance runner, and father of five grown children. You can listen to his podcast at: https://anchor.fm/david-ellingson. He lives in Edmonds, Wash.

3rd Act magazine | fall 2021

Your Last Meal In this James Beard-nominated podcast, Seattle radio personality Rachel Belle asks famous guests what they’d want at their last meal, then explores the science, history, and preparation behind their answers. It’s no surprise to learn that Ben Cohen and Jerry Greenfield of Ben & Jerry fame want fruit and a dessert bar. Zestful Aging Featuring New York psychotherapist Nichole Christina and more than 237 available episodes. Christina interviews a variety of experts on healthy aging and as a bonus she also dishes out DIY advice about podcasting. Other highly rated podcasts on the 2021 national Top 10 list: The Daily by the New York Times; the Peabody award-winning Radiolab, and two popular true crime series, Crime Junkie and Serial. www.3rdActMag.com

THE LIGHTER SIDE

Faux “Service Dogs” Draw Out My Canine Curmudgeon BY ANNIE CULVER

hile balancing on one leg in exercise class, I decided to step on shaky ground. I had met a lovely poodle named Betty, who belonged to a classmate, and I wanted to collect this devoted pet owner’s thoughts on dogs in supermarkets. It was my hunch she might think dogs and supermarkets were made for each other. “Unless it’s a valid service animal, I’d say it’s rude,” she said. What a relief! Her response brought to mind the healthy-looking young fellow with a broad smile who pranced down the meat aisle at Safeway with his Great Dane. “Is that a service animal?” I asked, my eyes bugging at the size of his canine. “Of course,” he said, with a sly look. “What function does your dog provide?” “Service,” he said. The store manager was no help. “We’re not allowed to ask,” she said, with a shrug. As more hotels, stores, pubs, workplaces, and public transportation adopt pet-friendly policies, folks like me who are allergic to pet dander are caught in a Catch-22 paradox. However, federal law and most state and local health regulations do not permit animals where food is sold. The only exceptions are service animals. These animals are vital to those with disabilities. Pets that simply provide comfort don’t qualify, though. A quivering Chihuahua in the checkout line at a PCC Community Markets prompted me to ask once again, this time rather loudly. “It’s my service animal,” the pet owner responded, with no explanation of the service the dog performs.

Aging with Confidence

As the Chihuahua and its owner scooted from the grocery store, a checkout clerk smiled my way and whispered, “Thank you for asking. We can’t.” Turns out supermarkets and restaurants can ask what service an animal performs, but they can’t ask for proof. And because most don’t want to offend their customers, few want to engage in this tussle at all. I wouldn’t challenge a blind person buying groceries with guide dog assistance. Nor would I question a police officer or security guard with a patrol dog sniffing under restaurant tables. Yet the popularity of showing off pups where food is sold is starting to rival a scene from the Westminster Kennel Club Dog Show. Could it be because Seattle now has more pets than children? It’s a bit of a jolt to realize how this could be changing the culture. An increasing number of pet owners consider it inconvenient to leave their dogs home when they make a run for groceries. What’s the point of service animal registries, tags and vests, plenty of which can be found online and potentially altered? When you make trips to supermarkets and other entities where food is sold, it makes sense to routinely require nationally standardized proof—not unlike showing a driver’s license—that your companion is a legitimate service animal. That way nobody is singled out, no hard feelings, no rudeness slipping through. Dogs in restaurants brings to mind a tale from 3rd Act publisher and editor Victoria Starr Marshall, on a visit to a restaurant some years ago in Chamonix, France with her husband and magazine partner David. “An older, single man at the table next to us had a little dog with him. Every time the very prim and professional waiter came with some food (and there are lots of courses in France), the little dog would charge out from under the table and latch onto the waiter’s trousers, ripping at them and snarling. “The waiter’s face never even changed during this as he calmly served the food, and the diner never admonished the dog. He just ate his meal like his dog biting the waiter was a perfectly normal occurrence. David and I could barely contain ourselves,” Victoria recalled. Annie Culver developed a knack for unearthing oddball characters and improbable events as a staff writer for various newspapers. In the early 90s, she went to work for websites where she wrote sassy essays aimed at women. In recent years, she morphed into a writer for several universities in the Northwest. She retired in 2016, yet still enjoys freelancing.

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| 3rd Act magazine 49

MY THIRD ACT

A WINE

ESCAPE

We live in a field that likes to pretend it’s a farm. A 14-acre field just a stone’s throw from the city limits of Spokane. It’s got it all—noxious weeds, a herd of deer, a little farmstead slouching modestly on its cobble foundation, and an orchard so old that it rivals the spooky tree scene at the beginning of the Wizard of Oz. And a production winery, alas, 4,000 square feet of one. Look to the South from our property and you’ll see Ponderosa pine-covered hills, Spokane’s signature vibe. Look to the West and you see the demarcation line between farms and suburbs, the old and the new West. The sea of new houses comes closer to us each month but hasn’t jumped the road yet. Change is definitely coming and maybe that’s just fine. But I’m not thinking about the urban growth boundary tonight. On the nightly walk back from the winery to the house, I always try and take stock. Anyone can take stock and reflect on the big things in life, but I think older people like me are particularly good at it. I’ve lived long enough and had enough of a complicated life to appreciate the luxury of being able to walk across a scratchy grass field at sunset and think about how fortunate we truly are.

3rd Act magazine | fall 2021

Drs. Phil and Patricia Butterfield

Our third act journey, from engineering and academia to winemaking by Dr. Patricia Butterfield

It’s hard to write about winemaking without sounding completely full of yourself. It’s a topic inextricably linked to hubris and ego. Starting a winery requires only a love for the fantasy of winemaking (and a seemingly endless stream of money). Staying with a winery requires much, much more. It requires a deep love of a slow craft. After five years we’re finally getting there—thanks in no small part to my husband, a man who is an impresario of projects. Every day is project day for Dr. Phil Butterfield. Recent projects included bottling Malbec, topping barrels, and finding a better cork supplier. Then there are those projects that involve setting up blending trials and killing—albeit in the most humane way possible— vagrant ground squirrels. Not quite the “Town and Country” version of winery ownership that people imagine. Rather, it’s our version—power washing equipment late into the night during the fall harvest, hearing the busy hum of winery guests all summer, and learning to become a germ-free zone www.3rdActMag.com

Clockwise from top left: The Butterfield farm; Winemaker Phil Butterfield and Cellarmaster Matthew Chiders; Winescape Rose (photo by Richard Duvall); Phil cleaning picking bins at the end of a long day; next batch aging to perfection.

throughout a pandemic. Whew. Winemaking brings with it a seasonal rhythm we’ve both come to appreciate. And thank God for our amazing staff who have stayed with us this past year. They are the real essential workers and the authentic heroes of the COVID recovery. Beyond Phil and our incredible team, I can honestly say our wine club members got Winescape through the pandemic. Like all hospitality venues we were open, then closed, then open and closed again concurrent with the ebb and flow of the pandemic. When we were closed our “winescapers,” as we call them, sent us notes of encouragement and showed up to buy wine anytime we put the word out on a sale or special. They volunteered to help sort grapes, label bottles, or do whatever else was needed. They would drop food off for us during harvest, just when it seemed we couldn’t get any more nuttily incoherent from working 40+ successive days. In sum, our wine club members showed up spontaneously when we needed them most. They stayed with us in a way that touched us profoundly. We try to pay them back by making great wine, knowing that our bottles will be opened on holiday tables and on special nights with friends. And I have to say that the wines Aging with Confidence

are really good. Phil designed water treatment plants for engineering company CH2M Hill for 25 years before getting into academia, then winemaking, so he knows a thing or two about water (or wine) chemistry. Then to top it off he got a PhD in biofilm engineering, just so he could techno-shame us with his newfound understanding of microbiology. Clean winemaking, true to the varietal, is his forte. As a former dean (go Cougs) and department chair (go Huskies…kind of), I have a type of vague and marginally useful skillset for winery ownership. So, I do a lot of the behind-the-scenes work, run endless errands, and do our marketing and social media work—after decades of shunning this stuff. It’s getting late on this evening as I write this, and Phil needs to push the destemmer back into the winery; otherwise, he’ll worry about it and won’t be able to sleep. Sure, I’ll head down there, too, and open the roll-up door. Then walk back. It’s a chance to walk across the field during magic hour. Another chance to take stock. Dr. Patricia Butterfield has served as faculty at Oregon Health & Science University, Montana State University, University of Washington, and Washington State University (WSU). She was Dean of Nursing for WSU statewide from 2007-2015. Her research addresses environmental health risks to rural and underserved families. She recently retired from the Elson S. Floyd College of Medicine at WSU.

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DISCOVER NORTHWEST

White Pass Scenic Byway From late September through October, the vine maples, high elevation huckleberries, and tamaracks on White Pass Scenic Byway (US-12) transform the route’s geologic variety show into a 119-mile technicolor pageant of reds, coppers, and golden yellows. Leaving the Salkum Plateau, US-12 travels past lakes and floodplains, ascends foothills to an alpine pass, and then descends into riparian canyons surrounded by volcanic cliffs. Fall and its foliage aren’t the only reason or season to make this road trip. Year round there are recreational opportunities galore, history, mountain town festivities, craft beer and coffee, good eats, and plenty of accommodation options for a multi-day adventure. It all begins at Exit 68 on I-5 south of Chehalis. Six miles east of the exit make a pit stop at the historic Lewis and Clark State Park and the nearby John R. Jackson

3rd Act magazine | fall 2021

A mountain trifecta awaits on this epic drive BY ANN RANDALL

House, both located on the north spur of the Oregon Trail. The park includes a half-mile walk through a rare stand of old growth trees, while the 1845 Jackson House provides a glimpse into the multifaceted life of the area’s first non-Native settler whose cabin housed the area’s first post office and state’s first federal courthouse. Look for glimpses of the mountain trifecta: Rainier, Adams, and Hood, before arriving in Mossyrock, located between Mayfield and Riffe lakes. Both lakes have shoreline parks and water recreational opportunities. In their beds lie the former towns of Riffe, Kosmos, Mayfield, and the Cowlitz tribal community of Nesika, all thriving prior to 1946 when www.3rdActMag.com

they were razed to build the Tacoma Power hydroelectric dams you see on the route. That history (still a sore point for some locals) has been preserved in two museums: Cowlitz River Valley Historical Museum in Morton and the larger White Pass Country Historical Museum housed up the road in Packwood’s former elementary school. Gaining elevation, turn left into Morton, home of the Morton Loggers Jubilee, the August “granddaddy of all logging shows.” It’s a unique opportunity to watch local and national contestants compete in axe throwing, choker setting, bucking, tree speed climbing, and log rolling. If you’re hungry, make your way to Rivers Coffeehouse & Bistro. Located in a lovingly remodelled former hotel and tavern, the upscale Morton eatery serves crepes, waffles, soups, salads, share boards, pizzas, and burritos. And it houses a lending library! Continuing east the byway cuts through Packwood, a charming mountain town and the convenient base for 16 nearby hikes ranging from the quarter-mile Layser Cave stroll ending at one of the state’s most significant archaeological sites to a short, steep hike to the High Rock Fire Lookout. Thirteen miles east you can enter Rainier National Park and choose between a hike to the 1,000-yearold Grove of the Patriarchs, which includes the park’s largest red cedar, or to spectacular Silver Falls. For golfers Packwood’s nine-hole golf course, High Valley Country Club, is open to non-members. If you’re lucky you’ll rub shoulders with a herd of local elk playing through. For fishing aficionados, Packwood Lake is home to a genetically distinct species of rainbow trout. Before setting out on the day’s adventure, quench your thirst and scone craving on the deck of Packwood’s Mountain Goat Coffee Company. And make sure to reward yourself post-adventure with a beer and nachos at the Packwood Brewing Company located in a historic general store. There are several options if you want to bring home a byway memento. Mossyrock is home to two u-pick blueberry farms and the DeGoede Bulb Farm & Gardens. Morton and Packwood host summer/fall Saturday Farmers Markets selling local produce, flowers, and handmade crafts. And Packwood bookends their summer with the most popular flea markets in the Northwest, two multi-day events with over a mile of vendors held on Memorial Day and Labor Day weekends.

Twenty miles past Packwood is White Pass ski area offering winter downhill and Nordic skiing and snowshoeing, and summer/fall hiking possibilities, including a section of the 2750-mile Pacific Crest Trail. The route then begins its downhill journey passing six-mile Rimrock Lake before entering a narrow canyon following the Tieton River. The Oak Creek Wildlife Area runs a winter elk feeding program from December to May, allowing visitors to view herds from the parking lot and on truck tours. The area is also a prime spot for seeing mountain goats. In two miles you’ll arrive at the Highway 410 intersection. Here you have a decision to make. Turn right and drive into Naches to complete your White Pass journey or turn left to traverse the equally majestic Chinook Pass Scenic Byway, aka the Stephen Mather Memorial Parkway. Mather, the founding director of the National Park Service, promoted building scenic roadways between national parks so this byway twofer possibility should be credited to him. Turn left. He’d want you to take advantage of it. Ann Randall is a freelance writer, organizational consultant, and independent traveler who loves venturing to out-of-the-way locales, from Azerbaijan to Zimbabwe. Retired from a career as a teacher and union organizer in public education, she now observes international elections, does volunteer work in India, and writes regularly for 3rd Act, Northwest Travel & Life, West Sound Home & Garden, Fibre Focus, and Dutch the Magazine.

Clockwise from top left: Mountain Goat Coffee and Bakery in Packwood; entrance sign to Lewis and Clark State Park, which is about 2.5 miles from the I-5 entrance to the byway; High Valley Country Club in Packwood (Photos by Ann Randall)

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There’s nothing like this lush valley of 16 terraced lakes, laced together by waterfalls and miles of pleasant planked lakeside walkways. That this park’s unique and stunning beauty isn’t universally known is yet another reminder that Europe offers endless marvels beyond its most famous sights. On my first visit, I began at a viewpoint for a panoramic orientation. Stretching before me was a European Niagara Falls, diced and sprinkled over a heavily forested Grand Canyon. Heading down a steep zigzag path, I left cars and concrete behind, and entered a pristine world of waterfalls, lakes, and trees populated with Croatian families at play. The boardwalk trail from here carries visitors across the middle of a lake for an up-close view of a row of gurgling waterfalls. I followed it past Šupljara Cave, the location of a German “Spaghetti Western” filmed here in the 1960s and still beloved by German tourists today. Continuing along a path leading to more picturesque cascades, I pondered the strange juxtaposition of Plitvice’s overwhelming natural beauty with its relatively recent misfortunes. On Easter Sunday in 1991, the first shots of Croatia’s war of independence from Yugoslavia were fired in this park. The predominantly Serbian Yugoslav army occupied Plitvice and the surrounding region until 1995, and most of the Croatians you’ll meet here now were evacuated to live near the coastline as refugees during the war. Today there’s not a hint of the war and the park is again a popular tourist destination. On a busy day, the park welcomes more than 14,000 visitors, mostly Croatians and other Europeans. Most Americans, meanwhile, are still oblivious to Plitvice’s charms. Silent, pollution-free electric boats shuttle hikers across the park’s biggest lake. While waiting for the boat, I chatted

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Croatia’s Stunning

Plitvice Lakes In Croatia’s rugged interior, a stone’s throw from the Bosnian border, hides one of Europe’s most exciting walks— through Plitvice Lakes National Park. BY RICK STEVES with some industrious grandmas who sell strudel and wheels of homemade cheese with the sophistication of a kid at a lemonade stand. A face-to-face encounter with hardworking, yet happy, Croatians will make anyone deeply thankful this corner of Europe is finally enjoying peace, prosperity, freedom, and stability. At the far side of the lake, more boardwalks lead to the most spectacular stretch of the trail—a wonderland of sleepy trout, Monet greenery, and frisky falls. There are a million ways to catch tiny rainbows in the mist as boardwalks wind around and above the bridal fair of lacy waterfalls. The lazy trout seem to understand that fishing is forbidden— they’re huge, plentiful, and oblivious to the many visitors. As I strolled, I watched for the park’s fabled wildlife. It boasts deer, wolves, wildcats, lynx, wild boar, voles, otters, and more than 160 species

of birds. But on this visit, apart from the throngs of trout, I found only mice. Plitvice is also home to about 50 highly endangered European brown bears, but they have the good sense to stay far from the hiking paths. A geologist would be less disappointed. This fantasy world of lakes separated by natural limestone dams, constantly built up by deposits of calcium carbonate, even as they’re eroded by the flow of water, is a perfect storm of unique geological features you’ll rarely find elsewhere on earth. The park is on most Croatia bus-tour itineraries. It’s possible to get there by public bus (two hours from Zagreb, departing several times each day), but is much easier by car. Because the park is so well-organized for an efficient visit, most visitors find that a few hours to hike the trails is plenty. I recommend arriving in the evening when crowds have thinned, spending the night, then hiking right after breakfast—then move on after lunch. If the park’s three hotels feel like they were built for big tour groups during the communist era it’s because they were. To save money and enjoy a more intimate experience, try one of the many sobe (rooms in a private home, like B&Bs) dotting the countryside around the park. After a few hours of strolling the Plitvice boardwalks, drop by the rustic park restaurant, with its heavy-timber beams, open wood-fired grill, and tallhatted Croatian chefs serving up some of those trout that have been grinning at you all morning. Sit back and count yourself lucky to be among the relatively few overseas visitors to have enjoyed this extraordinary spot. Rick Steves (www.ricksteves. com) writes European guidebooks, hosts travel shows on public TV and radio, and organizes European tours. You can email Rick at rick@ricksteves.com and follow his blog on Facebook.

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Exotic waterfall and lake landscape of Plitvice Lakes National Park, UNESCO natural world heritage and famous travel destination of Croatia.

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NOURISH YOUR BODY

My Hero, Mark Bittman

Inspiration and Purpose Over the Decades

first encountered Mark Bittman when he was a NY Times food columnist and his book The Minimalist had just been published. Since then, he has won every foodrelated award imaginable and has been in the vanguard of exploring plantbased food as a lifestyle since 2015. His more than 30 books include my go-to when I want basic approaches to pretty much anything: How to Cook Everything—Simple Recipes for Columnist Mark Bittman. Photo by Larry D. Moore Great Food. (I grew up with The Joy of Cooking. While it is hard to let go writing is approachable, lively, and of, I find even the recent edition feels passionate. I believe it’s one of the outdated and not as easy to follow as important books of our times. Bittman.) This past year, which we all As he says in the book’s BY REBECCA have our own words to describe, introduction, “Anyone can CRICHTON has resulted in Bittman’s latest cook, and most everyone online endeavor, The Bittman Project, should.” He emphasizes buying things a membership organization that that are fresh and local, a dictum we includes recipes, profiles of chefs and now take for granted, as the way to other food-related practitioners, videos, start making good food. But he warns and member-generated interactive against making yourself crazy doing conversations. it. “…You buy the best ingredients you A recently added regular feature can lay your hands on and combine shares low-cost recipes that feed a them in ways that make sense. That’s family. If you’ve ever wanted to make the thinking behind my recipes.” seitan—or find out what’s even in it— His newest nonfiction, no-recipes this is your chance! book, Animal, Vegetable, Junk: A My growing appreciation of Bittman History of Food, from Sustainable to and the importance of his work relate Suicidal lays out the narrative of how to two aspects of his work. First, I we got to this perilous time in our like his approach to food. He is not history as consuming humans. His

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attached to giving recipes that need to be followed to perfection. He has those, of course, although there is always the additional encouragement to play around with ingredients, like substituting different herbs, different sweeteners or oils, different proteins, or starches. For older people who grew up believing there is only one way—a right way—to make certain things, this can be unsettling. Yet, once you know how to think about food with knowledge and curiosity, Bittman can be your guide and friend. This is also when I remember three essential attributes for successful aging: Adaptability, flexibility and resilience. Playing around with food is a great place to start with that. You might not think resilience comes into play with food, but I assure you it does. Trying new things means we might make mistakes. We might even fail at something we’ve put a lot of effort into. Learning to manage the disappointment without too much apology, blaming, or defensiveness is always worth learning. Second, Bittman is a true prophet in the land of corporate greed and mono-culture agriculture. He asks, “What would a just food system look like? I believe we can answer that question…because nothing is more important than food. “You can’t have a serious conversation about food without talking about human rights, climate change and justice. Food not only affects everything, it represents everything.” Before Rebecca Crichton worked for Boeing, taught leadership development, or became executive director of the Northwest Center for Creative Aging, she was a caterer, recipe developer, and food journalist. She has taught cooking to seniors and others, and can reel off food ideas and recipes for any part of a meal or event. She believes in easily prepared, healthy, and taste-filled food that delights and satisfies.

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I’m sharing one of my favorite Bittman recipes, “Instant” Preserved Lemons. As it notes, you can use these in dishes where you want something to liven up the mix. Finally, my version of a Fall fruit clafoutis, using Bittman’s proportions. Clafoutis is essentially a large sweet pancake baked with fruit. Bittman writes, “It is among the best desserts you can make at the last minute. Put it in the oven when you sit down to dinner and you can eat it for dessert.”

Fruit Clafoutis

Mark Bittman’s “Instant” Preserved Lemons

• 3 eggs

You can use fresh fruit, dried fruit, or even a mixture of dried and fresh— think dried cranberries with apples or pears. Ingredients • 1 tbsp butter for greasing the baking dish • ½ cup sugar, plus a bit extra for dusting the greased baking dish • 4 cups of fruit—pears or apples, peeled and cut in slices, halved Italian plums, or dried apricots, and cherries, etc. electric mixer, or processor until foamy and somewhat thick.

• 1/3 cup all-purpose flour

4 organic lemons or Meyers lemons (wash lemons well)

• ¾ cup heavy cream, plain yogurt, or buttermilk

1–1½ tbsp salt

• ¾ cup milk

2 tbsp sugar

• 1 tsp vanilla extract

Slice lemons in ¼ inch slices and remove all seeds. Dice lemon slices and put in bowl or jar.

• 1/8 tsp almond extract

Add salt and sugar and mix well. Leave lemons out for up to three hours and then refrigerate. They can be used right away and keep for several weeks. Use in salads, soups, stews, over fish, vegetables, or anywhere you want a bright hit of flavor.

• Add flour and continue to beat until thick and smooth. Add cream, yogurt, or buttermilk, milk, vanilla, almond extract, and salt. Beat until incorporated. • Pour batter over fruit.

• Pinch salt • Confectioners’ sugar Directions • Preheat oven to 375 degrees. Buter a gratin dish 9x5x2 inches deep or a 10-inch round deep pie plate or porcelain dish; sprinkle it with sugar (inverting to remove excess). • Put fruit in one layer in dish. • Beat the eggs until foamy. Add the ½ cup sugar and beat with whisk,

• Bake for about 30 minutes, or until clafoutis is nicely browned on top and knife inserted into comes out clean. • Sift confectioners’ sugar over it and serve warm or at room temperature. Of course whipped cream, heavy cream, or ice cream would go well on top! Makes 4 to 6 servings

Use preserved lemons in salads, soups, stews, over fish, vegetables, or anywhere you want a bright hit of flavor.

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FALL 2022! We’re taking reservations NOW for our 2022 3rd Act Trip!

Crossroads of the Adriatic We are ready to travel again and invite you to join our small group on this exciting trip. Our maximum group size of 14 will journey with Overseas Adventure Travel (OAT) as our guides, to the countries of Croatia, Montenegro, Bosnia & Herzegovina, and Slovenia—southeastern Europe’s multicultural lands of forgotten beauty. This will be our third trip with OAT and they have always exceeded our already high expectations. As of this writing we have 8 spots available, and singles can join us with no supplement fee!

Base Trip Cost: $4,295 Airfare from Seattle: $1300 Deposit: $350 ONLY 8 SPOTS AVAILABLE. HERE’S HOW TO REGISTER FOR THIS TRIP: · Call Overseas Adventure Travel Reservations 877-220-2630 · Say you want to register for Crossroads of the Adriatic 2022 with 3rd Act Magazine · Mention Group Code G2-27967 · Mention Code TABC139 for a time-limited $500 discount!

For questions or to request the itinerary, email Victoria@3rdActMag.com 58

3rd Act magazine | fall 2021 Aging with Confidence

www.3rdActMag.com winter winter2020 2020 | 3rd Act magazine

Andy Walker as Sebastian and Michael Monicatti as Viola in Twelfth Night. PHOTO BY HMMM PRODUCTIONS

RE-ENTER STAGE LEFT:

Seattle Area Theaters Get Their Acts Back Together BY MISHA BERSON

Curtain up! Light the lights! Blow a kiss, take a bow! For Seattle area theaters, is everything coming up roses? The actors are eager and ready. So are the directors, designers, technicians, and the many others who make live theater happen. They are raring to go because since spring of 2020, Seattle performance venues have been on an extended, unexpected, and unprecedented intermission. Collectively, they’ve had to cancel scores of live shows, lay off hundreds of staffers, and close their doors to the public. And what of their audience? Since the COVID-19 pandemic kept us from mingling together in person for well over a year, it has turned even many of the most ardent theater-devotees into homebodies. We’ve been getting our drama and comedy fixes in our living rooms, from television and other streaming devices, rather than in-person shows. Yet, at last, it looks as though live entertainment—and theater is one of the liveliest—is on a comeback track. Broadway is getting starstruck again. And in our area, the drama engine restarted this summer with free Shakespeare performances Aging with Confidence

in the park by local troupes including Seattle Shakespeare Company and GreenStage. It won’t be easy to rev up fulltime production and woo back ticket buyers en masse. But local stage insiders say they are determined, committed, even hopeful that theater in and around Seattle—long considered one of the most prolific show towns in the country—can survive and thrive again. “I do believe one thing we all really missed in this time between the crazy political season, the COVID lockdown, and losing so many people to this terrible disease was our ability to gather together and share experiences through arts and culture,” says Bernadine Griffin, the general manager of the 5th Avenue Theatre, one of Seattle’s largest and most popular venues. The 5th Avenue is looking ahead to early 2022 to start its next season, but hopes to offer at least some events during the coming holiday season. “I’m just as grateful for my Netflix account this year as anyone,” says Braden Abraham, artistic director of the Seattle Rep, the city’s longest-running major playhouse. “It goes to show we need art in our lives to get us through the toughest times. But this [physical] isolation has also taught us that nothing quite matches the experience of being in the theater together. It will be the plays and the thrill of live performance that will bring people back.” (CONTINUED ON NEXT PAGE)

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Bernadine Griffin, General Manager, 5th Avenue Theatre PHOTO BY MARK KITAOKA

Kathy Hsieh, Seattle’s Office of Arts &Culture

“There’s been so much love and support and hope for each other that it’s been our saving grace.” —KATHY HSIEH, SEATTLE OFFICE OF ARTS & CULTURE

As theaters carefully plot their moves for the coming year, keeping in mind the health and safety concerns of their workers and patrons, they do so carefully and slowly, after a statewide shutdown threatened their very existence. In fact, it is a mark of how much our cultural life means to us in this area that the larger, multi-million-dollar arts institutions, including Seattle Opera, the Pacific Northwest Ballet, and Seattle Symphony have managed to soldier on— and remain, to a degree, artistically vital, even with their marquees darkened. “Every single theater in this region with paid staff had to lay off a significant percentage of their workers,” says Kathy Hsieh, who surveys the scene from two different perspectives. She is the cultural partnerships & grants manager for the city of Seattle Office of Arts & Culture, as well as a professional actor, director, and playwright. She is also the co-executive producer for SIS Productions, a local Asian American theatre company. The 5th Avenue, which presents musicals old and new in its historic 2,100-seat downtown theater, laid off 70 percent of its staff in March 2020. Notes Griffin, “Everybody who stayed on did so at reduced pay and with reduced hours.” Griffin estimates that usually the 5th Avenue’s

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John Bradshaw, Managing Director, Seattle Shakespeare Company

homegrown and imported Broadway musicals log roughly 250,000 admissions in a regular season. When the pandemic struck, the company was well into their 2020-2021 season subscription drive. “We had to stop subscriptions and reach out to all of our ticket holders for upcoming events. We asked if they’d consider donating their tickets back to the theater, or turning them into a gift certificate for future shows,” she says. “But we knew people had their own money worries too, so we also offered refunds.” Griffin was gratified that only 20 percent of ticket holders requested their money back, which gave the 5th Avenue a bit of extra financial breathing room. And to her surprise, the company’s generous financial donors continued to support the institution at regular levels. The 5th Avenue was also among the numerous local theaters and other arts organizations that applied for and received money from the Paycheck Protection Program. This federal relief fund administered by the Small Business Administration was designed to help businesses keep workers on the payroll and cover some additional overhead expenses. There was also assistance from state, county, and city

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government programs. “We were the first city nationwide to host a webinar stating that we were giving reallocated funds to arts and cultural organizations,” says Hsieh. “We also worked with theaters and landlords to defer rent payments on arts facilities.” King County’s 4Culture and the local philanthropic organization ArtsFund also helped out. And the federal government is now making available more financial relief through the new Shuttered Venue Operators Grant, which targets performing arts producing and presenting entities. All that support, however, did not make up for the loss of ticket revenue. Nor did it keep Seattle’s large pool of professional actors and other workers from relying mainly on unemployment benefits. But theaters got creative about using the Internet to entertain and inform their patrons, occasionally employ at least some of their artists and, perhaps, draw in some future patrons. While granting playwrights cash commissions to write new plays for the coming years, Seattle Rep also hosted opento-the-public discussions, workshops, teen performances, and virtual play reading groups. The 5th Avenue, Seattle Shakespeare Company and Book-It Repertory Theatre stirred up interest and employed artists by presenting “radio plays” one could listen to online. “We jumped on this cool idea of developing new musicals through radio plays,” reports Griffin. “We’ve been able to take new work to the next level that way, and I think we’ll bring that program forward after we reopen.” Seattle’s high-profile ACT Theatre’s digital offerings have included a play-in-process about the history of Black theater in Seattle, and a performance of noted solo theater artist Dael Orlandersmith’s Until the Flood, a stirring piece exploring the social uprising in Ferguson, Missouri, following the shooting of teenager Michael Brown. (It is available on demand at allarts.org through 2022.) Theaters also pitched in by allowing their empty lobbies to be used for blood and food collection drives. They kept young people involved in ongoing programs like Issaquahbased Village Theatre’s KIDSTAGE. And many participated in regular meetings of the Seattle Theatre Leaders, which brainstorms how to improve racial, ethnic, and cultural equity in their institutions, increase accessibility in the theater world, and share resources between larger and smaller companies. “There’s been so much love and support and hope for each other that it’s been our saving grace,” Hsieh says. Though autumn marks the traditional opening of the Seattle theater season, when most of the several dozen

Aging with Confidence

theater companies in our region are looking to launch a full slate of live productions at (God willing) full audience capacity in early 2022. That’s when 5th Avenue plans to stage the new musical Afterwords, followed by a touring run of the hit Broadway musical Come from Away, about how a small town in Canada embraced stranded airline passengers after the 9/11 terrorist attacks. Seattle Theatre Group’s Broadway at the Paramount series has had to reshuffle its roster of national tours, but will present a tour of the musical Jesus Christ Superstar. And the group has announced the return of Lin Manuel Miranda’s blockbuster history musical, Hamilton, in mid-2022. ArtsWest in West Seattle is preparing the premiere of We’ve Battled Monsters Before, a new sci-fi fantasy musical created by Seattle writer-composer Justin Huertas, for late November. And Intiman Theatre plans a special event September 18-19 on Capitol Hill: Homecoming, an outdoor street festival featuring more than 20 hours of live performances, artist installations, vendors, food trucks, and a beer garden. No one can predict precisely what the immediate future holds, as all public institutions respond to shifting health regulations vis-a-vis the pandemic. So what can theaterlovers do to help this dynamic cultural resource rekindle its magic? Look for updates on theater company and local arts websites to learn the latest news of what is playing and when. Consider making a tax-deductible donation to a nonprofit troupe. Take the leap and buy a subscription or show tickets to one of your favorite theaters, as a demonstration of support and a vote of confidence. What else? “Other than giving money, I think helping theater in our area is even more about coming, participating, sharing your experiences with friends and loved ones,” says John Bradshaw, Managing Director, Seattle Shakespeare Company. “That’s the thing that’s been true forever and has accelerated in our social media world. There needs to be that energy and enthusiasm now more than ever.” For Abraham, it is about continuing and constantly renewing a cultural legacy that has enhanced our region for decades. “Seattle Rep turns 60 in two years,” he notes. “My hope is that the Rep is an essential part of the arts and cultural landscape of this city for another 60 years, and the theater truly represents the cultural depth and breadth of our city in all its richness and complexity.” Misha Berson writes about the arts for crosscut.com and many other media outlets, teaches for the UW Osher program, and is the author of four books, including Something’s Coming, Something Good: West Side Story and the American Imagination (Applause/Hal Leonard).

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3rd Act magazine | fall 2021

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BOOKS Three Gems You Won’t Find on the NY Times Reading List REVIEWED BY VICTORIA STARR MARSHALL

Writing While Masked: Observations on 2020

By Mary Ann Gonzales, Tyson Greer, Wanda Herndon, Laura Celiese Lippman, Jan Spalding, Suzanne Tedesco, and Beth Weir

When faced with pandemic isolation and lockdown, this writers’ group of seven accomplished Seattle women moved their weekly gathering to Zoom and set about chronicling the moment. Beginning in January 2020, each chapter represents a month of the year and opens with a calendar recap of significant societal, political, and COVID-19 related events that took place—the sheer magnitude of which is shocking. What follows is a superb collection of poetry, short essays, and journal-style accounts of disruption, denial, gratitude, despair, anger, frustration, and hope as each sought to make sense of an extraordinary year. Writing While Masked can be purchased online through Third Place Books in Seattle. CHICAGO QUARTERLY REVIEW CHICAGO QUARTERLY Anthology of Black American Literature REVIEW

Edited by Charles Johnson

CHICAGO QUARTERLY REVIEW

The murder of George Floyd in May 2020 galvanized the Black Lives Matter movement and revealed the blind spot many—if not most—white Americans have in understanding the experience of living as a person of color in this country. For me, the realization of my whitewashed life was a profound awakening and lead me to start seeking out a new genre of books, movies, and stories to educate and inform myself. A collection of poetry, essays, and excerpts written by some of America’s most revered Black voices, Anthology of Black American Literature allows us to step into lives and perspectives that may be very different from our own, but at the same time remind us of the commonality all souls share. In his review of Anthology of Black American Literature in Newcity Lit, Donald G. Evans says it this way: “Ultimately, the success of this anthology, all put together, lies in the fact that it is by Black writers but not exclusively for a Black audience. These timely and considerate pieces are about love, friendship, family, about hopes and fears, as much as about any particular issue. This anthology is a work in which a greater humanity, not yet realized, is the focus, and the sense that we can all do better for one another is a sentiment that trumps even the central theme of race.”

Volume 33 2021

Jeffery Renard Allen Steven Barnes Arthur Burghardt Cyrus Cassells Louis Chude-Sokei Aaron Coleman celeste doaks Rita Dove Rachel Eliza Griffiths Peter J. Harris Le Van D. Hawkins Tsehaye Geralyn Hébert David Henderson E. Hughes Charles Johnson Jamiel Law Clarence Major John McCluskey, Jr. E. Ethelbert Miller Yesenia Montilla David Nicholson Delia C. Pitts Mona Lisa Saloy Sharyn Skeeter Clifford Thompson Jerald Walker Jan Willis

CHICAGO QUARTERLY REVIEW

Chicago Quarterly Review: Anthology of Black American Literature

CHICAGO QUARTERLY REVIEW

CHICAG QUART REVIEW

CHICAGO QUARTERLY REVIEW

CHICAG QUART REVIEW

Anthology of Black American Literature Edited by Charles Johnson Volume 33 · 2021

Shape Up!! as you Sit, Stand, Walk: It’s Nature’s Exercise By Helen Fleder

This slim book on posture by Helen Fleder has transformed how I view the importance of posture and increased my awareness of how I sit, stand, and hold myself. A former ballerina, Fleder, now 97, provides an ingenious image to help visualize good posture and remind us to hold ourselves in proper alignment. Simple exercises combined with some sound advice on attitude and stress management, Shape Up!! offers an easy road map to living well and living longer, by someone who’s done just that. Shape Up!! is available on Amazon.com.

GAMES FOR YOUR BRAIN ANSWERS

(Puzzles on page 64)

Aging with Confidence

Palindromes 1. Bib 2. Ewe 3. Pup 4. Eve 5. Bob 6. Dud 7. Gig 8. Gag 9. Kayak

Who and Where in History 1. 753 BC Romulus and Remus 2. 1492 King Ferdinand and Queen Isabella of Spain 3. 1775 Lexington, Massachusetts 4. 1861 Fort Sumpter 5. 1896 Athens, Greece 6. 1913 The zipper 7. 1945 Cerebral hemorrhage (stroke) 8. 1961 Yuri Gagarin 9. 1964 Tanzania 10. 1986 The Soviet Union (now Ukraine)

fall 2021

Two-Part Word Game 1. Stone (stole) 2. Eight (light) 3. Dairy (daily) 4. Peace (place) 5. Yeast (least) 6. Graze (glaze) 7. Purse (pulse) 8. Save (sale) 9. Prank (plank) 10. Demon (lemon)

| 3rd Act magazine 63

GAMES for your brain Exercise your brain and have some fun with these puzzles designed to stimulate different cognitive functions.

Palindromes (easy)

Palindromes are words or phrases that read the same backward and forward. Madam, I’m Adam is a well-known palindrome. In this game, all of the answers are one-word palindromes. 1. Restaurants offer this with boiled lobster to protect your clothes.___________________________________________________________ 2. A mature female sheep._______________________________________________________________________________________________________ 3. Type of small tent for two people._____________________________________________________________________________________________ 4. Adam’s gal.____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________ 5. Mr. Barker of The Price is Right_________________________________________________________________________________________________ 6. A failed firecracker.____________________________________________________________________________________________________________ 7. A one-night job for a rock band._______________________________________________________________________________________________ 8. To choke … or a kind of joke.___________________________________________________________________________________________________ 9. A lightweight, one-person canoe of Eskimo origin.___________________________________________________________________________

Who and Where in History? (harder)

This trivia quiz will stretch your long-term memory muscles. 1. 753 BC According to legend, these twin brothers founded the city of Rome.___________________________________ 2. 1492 Christopher Columbus received a commission from these monarchs to seek a westward ocean passage to Asia._________________________________________________________ 3. 1775 Paul Revere rode 12 miles from Boston to this Massachusetts town to warn the colonists the British were coming.______________________________________________________ 4 1861 The Civil War began when Confederate forces fired on this South Carolina port._____________________ 5. 1896 The first modern Olympic games with athletes (male only) from 14 countries competing in 43 events took place in this city._____________________________________________

6. 1913 Swedish American inventor Gideon Sundback filed a patent for this device, which he called a “separable fastener.”____________________________________ 7. 1945 The nation mourned the passing of Franklin D. Roosevelt. What was the cause of his death?___________ 8. 1961 This Russian cosmonaut became the first human ever to travel in space. The flight lasted 118 minutes from blastoff to landing and orbited the earth once.________ 9. 964 The African nations of Tanganyika and Zanzibar merged their territories and their names to form this new nation. ______________________________________________________ 10. 1986 An explosion and fire occurred in the No. 4 reactor at the Chernobyl nuclear power plant in this country._____________________________________________________

Double Trouble (hardest)

In Part One of this game you just have to answer the question correctly. In Part Two you need to replace one of the letters with an L (without changing the placement of any letters) to get a wholly different word. 1. Word that follows kidney, tomb, or rolling. ______________________ ______________________ 2. The number on the black ball in billiards. ______________________ ______________________ 3. In Jewish dietary laws, you don’t mix meat with this. ______________________ ______________________ 4. The absence of war. ______________________ ______________________ 5. Fermenting agent that makes bread rise. ______________________ ______________________ 6. What cows do in grassy meadows. ______________________ ______________________ 7. A lady’s wallet or pocketbook. ______________________ ______________________ 8. To put money away for a rainy day. ______________________ ______________________ 9. A practical joke or mischievous act. ______________________ ______________________ 10. An evil spirit or devil. ______________________ ______________________ Reprinted with permission from Nancy Linde, author of the best-selling book 399 Puzzles, Games, and Trivia Challenges Specially Designed to Keep Your Brain Young,417 More Games, Puzzles, and Trivia Challenges Specially Designed to Keep Your Brain Young, and 299 On-the-Go Games and Puzzles to Keep Your Brain Young. She is also the creator of the website Never2Old4Games.com, which is used by many seniorserving organizations in the U.S. and Canada.

3rd Act magazine | fall 2021

ANSWERS ON PAGE 63

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3rd Act Magazine – Fall 2021

Articles inside

BOOKS We review three gems you

MY THIRD ACT

NOURISH YOUR BODY

RICK STEVES TRAVEL

DISCOVER NORTHWEST

OUR INNER AGEIST

ROLLING WITH THE

DREAM CATCHING

LEARNING ON PURPOSE

GETTING UNSTUCK

DO LESS AND MOVE MORE

EARTHLY REMAINS

AT ANY AGE Don’t let outdated

FROM CAT LITTER TO