Deep-London June 2010

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deep online at: www.deep-london.co.uk • www.issuu.com • facebook • www.myspace.com/wiredmag • @bonsai_editor Hello there.. ...welcome to issue 78. Ah, what joy, we put out a beer garden special and the sun comes out with a vengeance - fan-bloody-tastic! It’s ok, you don’t have to thank us, it’s all part of the service. Hopefully the inclusion of Beer Garden Detective Part Two this month will ensure more glorious weather, and we’ll push our luck even more next month with part three. In fact, if it keeps working we might drop a beer garden in every month and never be cold again, mwa-ha-ha-ha... Oh, it’s just started raining... Never mind, it’ll clear the air, as they say. Anyway, people who know about these things may have noticed a picture of the World Cup on the cover and that is because this month is our World Cup Special! Worry not though, non-footie fans, this is us we’re talking about, so most of the info consists of weird and wonderful national drinks and a cocktail for each and evey country. I will admit we haven’t tried them all - we’re good, but we’re not that good. And also we’re still alive. Actually, talking of the cover, I was tring to find a picture of glorious World Champions Italy holding the cup aloft (check the surname, people, I’m allowed to support Italy as well as England, hence the (very old) picture), but I couldn’t find one in a high enough resolution. Rest assured I have managed to slip one into the article. It’s only fair. Elsewhere, as mentioned above, we have the second instalment of Beer Garden Detective, which proved rather popular last month, so thanks to everyone who commented on it and also suggested yet more pubs for us to visit. It’s a dirty job, but somebody has to do it. If you visit any of our featured beer gardens, or any of the pubs mentioned in our special pro/anti World Cup directory could you do us a favour and mention it’s because of us that you’re there - it helps us get advertising and therefore continue churning out this kind of high-quality entertainment each and every month, for free! Thanks! Moving on, you may remember last month we mooted the Deep 7th Birthday Party. Well, you’ll no doubt be not-surprised-in-theslightest to hear that we haven’t got round to sorting anything out yet, but we live in eternal hope that one day, one day, we’ll be organised enough to do things when we’re supposed to. We may have news of a party next month, or we may not. Meh. Right, that’s it from me for another month, have a brilliant and peaceful World Cup, pip-pip, avanti, allons-y and FORZA ITALIA! Angela xxx Your Bonsai-Editor 1

June 2010 Issue Seventy Eight Contact Us: editor: angela ferrara tel: 07910 506197 e: angela@deep-london.co.uk staff and contributors: mystic mike, auntie may, lazy-boy, petal dunwoody, nick booth, raphael. cover illustration: nick booth advertising sales: call angela on 07910 506197 or e-mail angela@deep-london.co.uk publishing & design: deep-london web hosting: europahost, 94 southbridge road, south croydon, CR0 1AF, tel: 0845 644 1484. www.europahost.net random thanks: jean, tony, marie, jamie, mik, nick, ladbrokes,

congratulations: The England Cricket Team. r.i.p: Ray Alan (and also, presumably, Lord Charles).

GET YOUR EVENT LISTED: e-mail: ANGELA@ DEEP-LONDON.CO.UK what’s on listings are absolutely free!

Last date for inclusion in July issue -

24th JUNE


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JUNE 2010

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THIS MONTHS FEATURES: World Cup Special

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Beer Garden Detective

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World Cup Wallchart

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News

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Auntie May

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Month in Pix

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23 LISTINGS:

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What’s On Guide

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World Cup Featured Pub Directory

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It’s the World Cup - Hurrah! Or Boo! Depending on your viewpoint. We here at Deep aim to please both yay and nay-sayers, so welcome to our World Cup guide, including team fact-files, all the essential info to blag your way through it if you don’t know your Asamoah from your Endo, a cultural (read: alcoholic) guide to every country, some pictures and how to say Cheers! In 32 languages. Firstly though, Jamie Forbes (erstwhile lynchpin of Deepsponsored footie team, the now defunct Oakfield Wanderers), who knows a thing or three about the beautiful game, gives us the low-down, along with a not-biased-at-all prediction as to the winner...

A

t last! England are back in a major tournament, and for once qualifing with ease this time. The last european tournament two years ago was watched, but not enjoyed fully, without them in it. As much as a game between Slovakia and Paraguay may not particularly float your boat, EVERY game has relevance because your team could meet them later in the draw, which makes theoritical mathmaticians of us all. Always with the World Cup things that wouldn't normally happen, happen. Emotions run high and watching players react in different ways to the pressure they’re under (many for the first time) makes for interesting viewing - this is the moment they’ve been waiting and working so hard for, so you can guarantee the players who made the squads will be busting a gut to make their respective starting elevens. The groups seem fairly straightfoward with the seeded teams qualifing and the others fighting it out for second spot. In the group stages every team will be hoping to avoid defeat, therefore not leaving themselves too many points to make up, but too much caution and too many draws means points still won’t be enough to progress to the knockout stages, so expect some fairly gung-ho final minutes. Of course, assuming your team gets there, the knockout stage is

when the tournament really comes into its own. This is where the managers earn the huge amounts of money they’re being paid. Formations will be changed according to the opposition and personnel will be shuffled to each teams strengths and weaknesses. Get through the first stage and you’re through to the last eight, the quarter finals, then the semi finals, then onto the final, which sounds pretty easy until you factor in the fact that in every round, the cream of world football is (or should be, but you never know) is steadily rising to the top, and you WILL, at some point, have to beat them. If history is any guide, in most tournaments there are one or two players who start to hit great form, propelling their team through the competition and making them hot favourites to lift the trophy. The likes of Pele, Beckenbauer, Rossi, Maradonna, Baggio, Zidane and Ronaldo are prime examples [we don’t mention poor Roberto Baggio Ed]. At the last world cup, however, I didn’t think there was any one player who stood out to fill this role. This year, I think, will be different, but who will it be? Messi? Rooney? Drogba? Ronaldo? Kaka? VanPersie? On top of that the World Cup has a habit of throwing up unlikely heroes - not destined to win the thing, but to have a bloody good 4

time trying while lifting the whole event entertainment-wise (think Cameroon’s Roger Milla, dancing his way into the quarter finals in 1990), which is why it remains such a spectacle even to people who don’t know everything (or indeed anything) about football - it’s a great luridly-coloured bundle of mad names, mad players and mad fans, at least until they get knocked out. This is how I see it: England make it through the group stage, knock out the Aussies, tell France they don't deserve to be there (blatant handball, Henry), then go on to actually beat Brazil in the semi final after which it’s just a swift bit of revenge for the 'hand of god' (blatant handball again) as they trounce Argentina in the final. Gerrard lifts the trophy, the nation is joyous. Easy... Most of the weird drinks that follow can be found in these places. Please drink responsibly. www.drinkaware.co.uk www.thedrinkshop.com www.drinkon.com www.beerhere.co.uk www.justminiatures.co.uk www.thewhiskyexchange.com (not just whisky) www.snooth.com/wines/medea/ www.bienmanger.com


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GROUP A: South Africa Star player: Macbeth Sibaya - midfield. Expect: Lots of bustle and midfield physicality without scoring many goals. Odds of winning: 150-1 Blag it: Team nickname: ‘Bafana Bafana’ (‘the boys, the boys’) Most amusing player name: Surprise Moriri - happily, he’s not the goalie... Drink it: National Drinks: Rooibos Tea (herbal tea), Amarula Cream (similar to Baileys)... Cocktail: Springbok You will need: Half shot Amarula Cream (or Baileys), half shot Creme De Menthe. Method: Pour Creme De Menthe into glass, carefully pour Amarula Cream over the back of a spoon into glass so it floats. Glass: Shot. Say: Gesondheid! : (Ge-sund-hide) (Afrikaans), Ooggywawa! : (Oogy-Wawa) (Zulu)

Macbeth Sibaya - presumably his friend is called Duncan...

Mexico Star player: Cuauhtémoc Blanco - forward. Expect: Organised mayhem with goals coming from anywhere (6 players joint-top-scored in qualifying) Odds of winning: 100-1 Blag it: Team nickname: ‘El Tri’ (‘the three’ - from the flag colours) Most amusing player name: Jonny Magallón - it makes a pleasing sound... Drink it: National Drinks: Tequila, Mezcal... Cocktail: Margerita You will need: 1 part Tequila, 1 part Triple sec, 1 part Lime juice, Salt. Method: Frost the rim of a cocktail glass with salt (put salt on a plate, rub rim of glass with bit of lime, dip rim into salt). Shake all the ingredients together with cracked ice. Pour. Glass: Martini. Say: Salud! : (Sah-lud) 6

Cuauhtémoc Blanco - not easy to say, nor exactly easy on the eye...


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GROUP A: Uruguay Star player: Diego Forlán - forward. Expect: Nifty counter-attacking, physical defending and a dangerous attacking duo. Odds of winning: 125-1 Blag it: Team nickname: ‘Los Charrúas’ (an homage to indigenous Uruguayan tribe) Most amusing player name: Jorge Fucile, just because it sounds a bit rude. Yes, I am twelve... Drink it: National Drinks: Medio y Medio (a mix of white wine & champagne), Cider based punch... Cocktail: Tango (Uruguay claims to have invented the dance) You will need: 1/2 oz Sweet Vermouth, 1/2 oz Dry Vermouth, 1 oz Gin, 1/2 tsp Triple sec, 1 tblsp Orange juice Method: Shake all ingredients with ice, strain into a cocktail glass, serve. Say: Salud! : (Sah-lud)

The flowing locks and fancy footwork of Diego Forlán...

France Star player: Franck Ribéry - forward. Expect: Heavy use of wingers and a distinct air of caution. Odds of winning: 20-1 Blag it: Team nickname: ‘Les Bleus’ (‘the blues’) Most amusing player name: Abou Diaby - sadly, he wasn’t born in Abu Dhabi... Drink it: National Drinks: Wine, Champagne, Cointreau, Pastis, Calvados, Armagnac, Cognac, Cider, Chartreuse, Absinthe... (piss-heads)... Cocktail: Kir Royale You will need: Champagne, 1 shot Creme De Cassis, Raspberry or Strawberry to garnish Method: Almost fill a glass with chilled champagne, slowly Franck Ribéry - a tad short of va-vaadd creme de cassis to achieve a ‘blush’ effect, drop in voom, abundant in je ne sais quoi... raspberry / strawberry. Serve. Glass: Champagne. Say: Sante! : (Sahn-tay) 8


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GROUP B: Argentina Star player: Lionel Messi - forward. Expect: With boggle-eyed maniac Maradonna in charge, who knows, but expect entertainment, and for Messi to score a few. Odds of winning: 15-2 Blag it: Team nickname: ‘La Albiceleste’ (roughly ‘the white and skyblues’) Most amusing player name: Boo, there isn’t one, but I suppose ‘Lionel’ is quite amusing... Drink it: National Drinks: Maté (non-alcoholic herbal weirdness), Frenet (resembles jager), Quilmes (beer which comes in a bottle to match their footy kit)... Cocktail: Handball Cooler (See what we did there?) You will need: 1 1/2 oz Vodka, Club Soda, Splash of orange Lionel Messi, surely the only player juice, lime to garnish to be named after his own hair... Method: Put vodka in glass, fill almost to top with Club Soda, top with orange juice, garnish with a lime wedge. Glass: Highball. Say: Salud! : (Sah-lud)

Nigeria Star player: Peter Osaze Odemwingie - midfield. Expect: An attacking 4-4-2 with plenty of goals, both for and against. Odds of winning: 150-1 Blag it: Team nickname: The Green Eagles or The Super Eagles Most amusing player name: Danny Shittu. Again, I am 12... Drink it: National Drinks: As a muslim country, none alcoholic, but apparently ginger beer is the drink of choice.... Cocktail: Mule You will need: 1 1/2 oz Vodka, Ginger Beer, Dash of lime juice Method: Pour Vodka in glass, fill with ginger beer, add ice and squeeze lime. Glass: Tall. Alternatively, a bottle of Crabbie’s Alcoholic Ginger Beer should do the trick. Say: Cheers! (National language is English)

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Fans favourite Peter Odemwingie, who looks at least a decade younger than the shirt suggests...


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GROUP B: South Korea Star player: Park Ji-Sung - midfield. Expect: An impressive work-rate and dogged determination, but not a massive amount of flair. Odds of winning: 250-1 Blag it: Team nickname: The Taegeuk Warriors (The Taegeuk is the yin-yang symbol at the centre of the flag) Most amusing player name: Oh Beom-seok, purely because it sounds like the opening salvo of a one man band... Drink it: National Drinks: Soju (a sort of potato vodka)... Cocktail: Yin Yang You will need: 1/2 oz White chocolate liqueur (Godet), 1/2 oz Coffee liqueur (Kahlua) Method: Layer white chocolate liqueur over coffee liqueur. Alternatively this cocktail can be made with herbal liqueur (chartreuse, strega, izarra) over peppermint liqueur, or jagermeister over peppermint liqueur Glass: Shot. Say: We Ha Yeo! Gun Bae!

Park Ji-Sung - you have no idea the lengths I had to go to NOT to show him in a Man U shirt.

Greece Star player: Theo Gekas - forward. Expect: A frustrating defensive display. Odds of winning: 250-1 Blag it: Team nickname: Traditionally, the ‘Galanoleyki’ (blue & whites) Most amusing player name: Avraam Papadopoulos, the only player to own a string of laundrettes... Drink it: National Drinks: Ouzo, Metaxa... Cocktail: Illiad You will need: 2 oz Amaretto, 4 oz Ouzo, 3 Strawberries Method: Shake Amaretto and Ouzo with ice in a shaker, strain into glass, juice or blend 2 strawberries - pour on top of drink and let it seep down into the cocktail, garnish with a strawberry. Glass: Highball. Say: Stin Eyiassou! : (Stin Eye-ee-yass-ooh)

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Theo Gekas - ‘Ooh, look, the rare Lappet-faced Wowhawk...’’


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GROUP C: England Star player: Wayne Rooney - forward. Expect: I’m saying nothing. Odds of winning: 13-2 Blag it: Team nickname: Apparently, The Three Lions, although I’ve never heard anyone say that. In-ger-land. Most amusing player name: Emile Heskey, simply because I can’t believe he’s there... Drink it: National Drinks: Ale, Cider, Gin, Mead, Lager, Tea, Turps... Cocktail: English Rose You will need: 2 oz gin, 1 oz dry vermouth, 1 oz apricot brandy, 1/2 oz lemon juice, 1 tsp grenadine, maraschino cherry for garnish Method: Pour the ingredients into a cocktail shaker with ice cubes, Shake well, Strain into a chilled cocktail glass, Garnish with the maraschino cherry. Glass: Cocktail. Say: Cheers! Chin chin! Bottoms Up! Did you spill my pint?! Any from any other language, ‘cos we’re like that...

Wayne Rooney - ‘they wouldn’t let me on the ghost train ‘cos you have to be this tall. Oh, hang on...’

USA Star player: Michael Bradley - midfield. Expect: Lots of insufferable whooping and waving of flags if they beat us. Odds of winning: 80-1 Blag it: Team nickname: The Yanks, The Stars and Stripes. Most amusing player name: Edson Buddle. Oh, come on, if I have to explain why that’s funny then you’re reading the wrong magazine... Drink it: National Drinks: Bourbon, Beer... Cocktail: Manhattan You will need: 3/4 oz sweet vermouth, 2 1/2 oz bourbon whiskey, 1 dash Angostura bitters, 1 maraschino cherry 1 twist orange peel Method: Combine the vermouth, whiskey, and bitters with ice in a mixing glass Stir gently - don’t shake. Put cherry in serving glass, add booze. Twist orange peel over glass but don't drop in. Glass: Cocktail. Say: We invented you! 12

Michael Bradley - I think someone’s nicked your accordian mate.


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GROUP C: Algeria Star player: Karim Ziani - midfield. Expect: To be honest, not a lot - a leaky defence and a lack of pace up front, but they qualified, so fair play. Odds of winning: 600-1 Blag it: Team nickname: ‘Les Fennecs’ (the desert foxes) Most amusing player name: Lounes Gaouaoui, a man with an aversion to consonants. Get him on Countdown... Drink it: National Drinks: Medea wine is produced in Algeria but not generally, as a muslim country, drunk there. Medea grapes also make a good vodka... Cocktail: Coctel Algeria You will need: 3/4 oz Pisco Brandy, 3/4 oz Cointreau, 3/4 oz Apricot Brandy, 1 oz Fresh Orange Juice Method: Shake all ingredients with ice and strain into a chilled glass, garnish with orange peel, serve Glass: Martini. Say: Fisehatak : (Fiseh'atak) (Arabic) Sante! : (Sahn-tay) (French)

Karim Ziani in full premature aeroplane goal celebration mode

Slovenia Star player: Milivoje Novakovic - forward. Expect: Industriousness and a ridiculously tight defence. Odds of winning: 400-1 Blag it: Team nickname: ‘Zmajceki’ (‘The Dragons) Most amusing player name: Matej Mavric. Not funny, but expect tv pundits to be all over it for ‘maverick’ tackles... Drink it: National Drinks: Zganje, Medica (both types of brandy)... Cocktail: Horses Neck (the famous Lipizzaner horses originally came from Lipica, Slovenia) You will need: 1 lemon, 2 oz brandy, 8 oz ginger ale Method: Peel the lemon trying to keep the peel in one piece to form a spiral. Place this in a highball glass with one end hanging just over the lip of the glass (like a horse’s mane, see). Put some ice cubes in the glass and add the brandy and ginger ale. Stir before serving. Glass: Highball. Say: Na zdravje! : (Naz-drah-vee-ay) 13

Milivoje Novakovic - at 6’4”, the Slovenian Peter Crouch, except Nova’s scored more goals...


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GROUP D: Germany Star player: Miroslav Klose - forward. Expect: Uncharacteristic attacking play. Odds of winning: 16-1 Blag it: Team nickname: ‘Die Den Adler Tagen’ (‘those who wear the eagle’ - after their badge) Most amusing player name: Hans-Jörg Butt. Ah, sometimes it’s just too easy... Drink it: National Drinks: Beer, Schnapps, Jagermeister... Cocktail: Prost You will need: 1/2 oz Cherry Brandy, 4 oz White Wine, Soda Water, Ice Cubes Method: Shake cherry Brandy and Wine with ice. Strain into a white wine glass, complete with soda water and garnish with a couple of maraschino cherries. Serve. Glass: Wine glass. Say: Prost! : (Prohst)

Miroslav Klose. Strange but true, Klose only needs 6 more goals to overtake Ronaldo as the World Cup’s greatest goalscorer...

Australia Star player: Tim Cahill Expect: A difficult to dissect 4-2-3-1 formation with most goals coming from the midfield. Odds of winning: 150-1 Blag it: Team nickname: ‘The Socceroos’ (oh dear) Most amusing player name: Damn, there aren’t any... Drink it: National Drinks: Lager, Bundaburg Rum... Cocktail: Flamin’ Galah You will need: 2 oz. Cranberry Juice, 1 dash Grenadine, 1 dash Sambuca, 3/4 oz. Cherry Brandy, 3/4 oz. Vodka Method: Put dash of Sambuca in V-shaped cocktail glass and ignite. Mix vodka, cherry brandy, grenadine and cranberry juice over a scoop of ice in a shaker and shake well. Strain over burning Sambuca in the glass. Garnish with a lemon twist. ALWAYS USE CAUTION WITH FIRE!!!. Glass: Martini or other V-shaped cocktail glass. Say: Shrimp! Barbie! Argh, my hair is on fire! 14

Tim Cahill, who once declared he wanted to play for Ireland. Just saying.


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GROUP D: Serbia Star player: Milan Jovanovic - midfield. Expect: Skill and flair, with a solid defence. Odds of winning: 66-1 Blag it: Team nickname: The White Eagles Most amusing player name: Dragan Mrdja. Maybe he and Algeria’s Lounes Gaouaoui should get together on a vowel/consonant exchange scheme. Drink it: National Drinks: Sljivovica (plum brandy)... Cocktail: Raspberry Berryoska (Serbia is the world’s largest exporter of raspberries) You will need: 2 Measures Vodka, 6 Raspberries, 3 tsps sugar, 1 measure lime juice. Method: In a tumbler, muddle the lime juice, sugar and raspberries to create a paste. Fill the glass with crushed ice. Add the Vodka and stir well. Top the glass with extra crushed ice if needed. Glass: Tumbler. Say: Ziveli! : (ZHEE-vi-lee)

Milan Jovanovic - ‘Look, I can count to seven...’

Ghana Star player: Kwadwo Asamoah Expect: Enthusiasm tempered (or quashed, dependant on your outlook) by the coach’s cautious defensive 4-5-1 formation. Odds of winning: 80-1 Blag it: Team nickname: The Black Stars (see flag) Most amusing player name: Eric Addo - sounds like a agony page letter I once received from Eric, Addo. Still if England lose the Addington massive will have someone to cheer... Drink it: National Drinks: Apparently, Gin... Cocktail: Black Star Liner You will need: 1oz cold espresso coffee, 1 1/2 oz vodka (absolut if psoss), 1 1/2 oz Kahlua coffee liqueur, 1 oz white creme de cacao Method: Pour ingredients into shaker filled with ice, shake vigorously, and strain into chilled glass. It should be frothy. Glass: Martini. Say: Cheers! (English is the official language) 16

Kwadwo Asamoah practices his unique ‘cossack dancer’ goal celebration


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GROUP E: Holland Star player: Robin Van Persie - forward. Expect: Not total football, with a wobbly defence and reliance on a lone striker in their 4-2-3-1 formation. Odds of winning: 12-1 Blag it: Team nickname: ‘Oranje Leeuwen’ (‘Orange Lions’) Most amusing player name: Andre Ooijer, which is also the sound he makes when someone elbows him in the stomach, or when trying to summon spirits from the beyond. Drink it: National Drinks: Advocaat, Jenever/Genever (type of gin)... Cocktail: Clockwork Orange You will need: 1 1/2 shot Courvoisier, 1 1/2 shot Grand Marnier, 3 shots freshly squeezed orange juice. Orange slice to garnish. Method: Shake all ingredients with ice and strain into icefilled glass. Garnish with orange slice Glass: Tumbler. Say: Prosit! : (Prowst)

Robin Van Persie, seemingly being attacked by flies...

Denmark Star player: Nicklas Bendtner Expect: A solid defence, tight organisation and a viking-like workrate. Odds of winning: 150-1 Blag it: Team nickname: Apparently. ‘Olsen’s Eleven’ Most amusing player name: William Kvist, if only because it sounds like someone in ‘Alllo ‘Allo explaining a popular card game... Drink it: National Drinks: Akvavit (a type of vodka flavoured with carraway), Beer, Hyldeblomstsaft (elderflower cordial)... Cocktail: Elderflower Fizz You will need: 2 Measures Brandy, Top up Lemonade, 1/2 Measure Elderflower Cordial Method: In a glass half filled with cubed ice, build the ingredients in the following order: first the Brandy, then the Elderflower Cordial and top up with lemonade to finish. Glass: Highball. Say: Skål! : (Skol) 18

Nicklas Bendtner gets the hump at the reaction to his display of traditional Irish dancing...


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GROUP E: Japan Star player: Shunsuke Nakamura - midfield. Expect: A talented midfield running their legs to stumps to supply one striker. Odds of winning: 400-1 Blag it: Team nickname: Samurai Blue Most amusing player name: Keisuke Honda, the engine of the midfield. Ha... aha... oh dear. Drink it: National Drinks: Sake, Shochu... Cocktail: Mishima You will need: 30ml Triple Sec Liqueur, 30ml Sake, 30ml Orange Juice, 1tsp Grenadine Syrup, Ice Cubes Method: Shake all ingredients with ice. Strain into a cocktail glass, and garnish with a lemon slice, and a lychee. Serve Glass: Cocktail. Shunsuke Nakamora looking vaguely Say: Kampai! : (Kam-pie) like he needs the lavatory...

Cameroon Star player: Samuel Eto’o Expect: Long balls lumped towards giant striker. Odds of winning: 125-1 Blag it: Team nickname: The Indomitable Lions Most amusing player name: There isn’t one, really, unless you think calling a footballer Achille is tempting fate a bit. Drink it: National Drinks: Palm Wine, Beer... Cocktail: Red Lion You will need: 1 ounce dry gin, 1 ounce Grand Marnier, 1/2 ounce orange juice, 1/2 ounce lemon juice Method: Shake well with cracked ice, then strain into a chilled cocktail glass whose rim has been rubbed with lemon juice and dipped in sugar.. Glass: Cocktail. Say: Cheers! / Sante! : (Sahn-tay) (English & French are the official languages)

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Samuel Eto’o tries to ensure the photographer gets his best side...


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GROUP F: Italy Star player: Andrea Pirlo - midfield. Expect: Not really sure, with so many changes - especially to the strike force, but we, that is, the Italian Deep contingent, believe. Forza! Odds of winning: 14-1 Blag it: Team nickname: Azzurri (Azure blue, the colour of their shirts) Most amusing player name: Gattuso. Not a particularly funny name, but a funny little fella. Drink it: National Drinks: Wine, Grappa, Vermouth, Amaretto, Galliano, Limoncello, Prosecco, Martini, Sambuca... Cocktail: Bellini You will need: 2 ripe peaches, peeled, halved and stone removed, or equivalent using tinned peaches in natural juice, chilled champagne or prosecco, chilled champagne glasses Method: Purée peaches in a blender until smooth. Spoon Fabio Cannavaro and, ooh, is that into glass until 1/3rd full, slowly top up with champagne, the World Cup he’s holding? stirring as you pour. Serve. Glass: Champagne. I think it is... Say: Salute! / Cin cin! : (Salu-tay / Chin Chin)

Paraguay Star player: Roque Santa Cruz - forward Expect: A strong defence and a flexible formation strategy. Odds of winning: 80-1 Blag it: Team nickname: La Albirroja (the red and whites) Most amusing player name: Aldo Bobadilla, simply because it sounds like a tennis ball falling down some stairs. Drink it: National Drinks: Mate (drink made from Yerba Tea leaves) Cocktail: Royal Tea You will need: 2 parts Gin, 2 parts brewed and chilled Earl Gray Tea, Squeeze of lemon juice, Spoonful of sugar, lime slice for garnish Method: Pour the ingredients into a glass filled with ice, garnish with lime. Glass: Tumbler or Old-Fashioned. Say: Salud! : (Sah-lud)

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Roque Santa Cruz - ‘The Hiiills are alive...’


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GROUP F: New Zealand Star player: Shane Smeltz - forward. Expect: Not a lot, they had an incredibly easy qualifying group, but do have the Australian League’s Golden Boot winner in their ranks, for what it’s worth. Odds of winning: 2500-1 Blag it: Team nickname: The All Whites (like the all blacks but less menacing) Most amusing player name: None I’m afraid. Drink it: National Drinks: Feijoa (aka Pineapple Guava - try 42 Below Feijoa)... Cocktail: Kiwi Daquiri Shane Smeltz. It is, honest. You will need: 1 lime wedge, 2 tsp caster sugar, 45ml white rum, 1 tbsp lime juice, 1 kiwi, peeled and roughly chopped Method: Rub the rim of a martini glass with the lime wedge. Put the sugar in a saucer and dip in the rim of the glass. Blend the other ingredients with a handful of ice for 40 seconds until smooth. Pour into the glass and garnish with a slice of kiwi. Glass: Martini. Say: Kia Ora! (not the too-orangey-for-crows drink, but Maori ‘good health!)

Slovakia Star player: Marek Hamsik - midfield Expect: This is their first ever finals, so could be interesting. Apparently expect some decent football - only 4 European teams outscored them in qualifying. Odds of winning: 400-1 Blag it: Team nickname: The Repre, or ‘Reprezentacny Tim’ (‘the representative team’. Yes, really) Most amusing player name: Zdeno Strba, another for the vowel exchange programme. Drink it: National Drinks: Borovicka (juniper brandy), Slivovica (plum brandy)... Cocktail: Brandy Fizz Marek Hamsik, he of the many You will need: juice of 1/2 lemon, 1 1/2 tsps caster sugar, 2 tattoos and voluminous shorts measures brandy, Soda water to top up Method: Shake the ingredients well with ice, strain into a tumbler and fill with soda water. Decorate with a lemon slice. Continued after Beer Say: Na zdravie! : (Naz-drah-vee-ay)

Garden Detective...

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(part II) MORE al-fresco amusement...

GRASSY KNOLLS!

BEER GARDENS IN THE TRUEST SENSE OF THE WORD. LOOK - greenery - lovely!

A HIdden bit of calm on the shirley road, the cricketer’s has just been named croydon and sutton camra pub of the year - well done them! but as well

CRICKETER’s!

as award winning real ale servings, the crick also houses this green oasis out the back, and a patio area to boot. as well as the greenery you see, there’s also a play area for the ankle-biters and, according to the bloke who sent us in their direction (cheers!), a small nature reserve in which bill oddie is rumoured to have been lost for some considerable time... The Cricketer’s, 47 Shirley Rd, Croydon, Surrey, CR0 7ER

HIDEOUTS!

A hideout if there ever was

one, the lion is to be found down pawson’s road, and has seats out the front and another patio round the side. not a massive outdoor area for such a large pub, but pleasantly decked out away from the main road. the pub is rightly praised for its real ale (there are 5 on at the moment), and apparently the sunday lunches are massive and cost just £5.50. we shall investigate further and report back... The Lion Inn 182 Pawsons Road, Croydon, Surrey, CR0 2QD 24

LION!


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HIDEOUTS!

hidey-holes and hidden gardens for all your work-dodging needs...

behind the wheelwtight’s unassuming frontage on southbridge road lurks this rather marvellous and spacious garden. complete with barn, pretty foliage and an abundance of seating. sat behind the, again, unassuming but rather nice, pub, the garden is pretty free from traffic noise and is, as you can see, a bit of a suntrap. with a screen installed in the barn for the world cup, a kiddie friendly remit and a pride in being a community

wheelwrights!

pub, plus the promise of barbecues, we foresee the wheelwright’s becoming a fixture of the summer months. the wheelies - Approved! the Wheelwrights Arms, 126 Southbridge Road, Croydon

Serving as croydon’s only gay pub, the bird in hand has been going strong for nearly 30 years, with various additions such as a the light and airy back bar and this rather nice garden. a fair old size, it has covered bits, open bits, plenty of seating and lots of greenery. it’s also a bit of a sun-trap, and in the evening is beautifully lit. plenty of events happen within the pub, of which you can find out more at their swish

the croham arms, a hideaway of magnificent proportions in that many people don’t know it

website, www.birdinhand.uk.com

even has a garden. well, it does, and a rather

the bird in hand, 291 sydenham road,

nice one at that, the raised decking area is

croydon, CR0 2EL

asuntrap, and stays as one until the sun dips behind the actual pub, as my sun-burnt nose will attest. there’s plenty of foliage, some lovely flowers and interesting features such as the lion head fountain. a nice little garden in the heart of south croydon, the croham arms, 1 Croham Road, South Croydon CR2 7PB

Bird in hand!

The Croham! 25


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PAVED WAYS!

a plethora of paved pleasure...

A really nice and surprisingly large garden at the rear of the earl of eldon. previously in some disrepair, it’s been transformed into a lovely space by the new owner of the pub. yet another suntrap as you can see, the palms, whitewashed walls and chequered tiles give this garden a mediterranean feel, which, in south croydon, is something of a feat. keep your eyes peeled for further

EARL OF ELDON!

developments in the pub. the earl - approved! the earl of eldon, 63 Brighton Road, South Croydon, Surrey, CR2 6EE

yet another sun trap, the gipsy’s outdoor seating is possibly the hottest place i’ve sat this year.

Gipsy Moth!

fronting onto the colonnades car park, it’s actually quite quiet and never seems to have any breeze. a fantastic place for sun-worshippers, it does have a covered area at the side for those who crave a bit of shade. strictly speaking a carvery pub, the gipsy does a nice line in sunday roasts too, GIpsy Moth, The Colonnades 619 Purley Way Croydon CR0 4RQ

both a paved way and a hideout, the folly has seats out the front, as you can see, and another paved area out the back. a vast pub inside, the front of the folly is a good spot for peoplewatching, being located on the

FOLLY!

bustling selsdon road, The Folly, 13-15 selsdon road, south croydon, cr2 6pw.

rt III Next Month... Pa e iv ct te De en Beer Gard 28


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STREET LIFE!

following a complete, and quite nice,

refurb, the brief has lost its little hideout at the back, but retains a couple of tables out the front - there’s one, look, poking out there. they’ve also got swish new seating which remove the danger, which was ever present, of moving the old chairs they had and dropping backwards off the step onto the pavement, which used to be a regular occurrence. not the biggest seating area, but one that’s great for people-watching. The brief, 48 George Street, Croydon CR0 1PD

sat on the lower addiscombe road, the

cricketers!

cricketers (different from the shirley one, obviously, has both an ample seating area at the front, and a beer garden at the back, where kids are welcome. surprisingly quiet out front thanks to the trams, it’s the deep staggedring back from the summer festival pub of choice. the cricketers, 127 Lower Addiscombe Road, Croydon, CR0 6PU

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GROUP G: Brazil Star player: Kaká - midfield. Expect: Brazil. Nuff said. Odds of winning: 5-1 Blag it: Team nickname: Canarinhos (little canaries) / Verde Amarela (yellow and green) Most amusing player name: Kaká, if he wasn’t so bloody good. Drink it: National Drinks: Cachaça (Sugarcane), Caipirinha (Cachaça with Sugar and Lime)... Cocktail: Caipirinha You will need: 1 lime - quartered, 2 tsp fine sugar (some recipes use brown sugar), 2 oz cachaca. Method: Place the lime wedges and sugar into glass. Muddle well to create a paste. Fill the glass with ice cubes. Pour in the cachaca. Stir well (Keep the sugar mixed in the drink by Kaká, so clean cut you could injure yourself... stirring often). Glass: Old Fashioned. Say: Saúde! : (Sow-ooh-jee)

North Korea Star player: Hong Yong-jo - forward Expect: A solid defence with two foreign-based counter-attacking forwards. Odds of winning: 2000-1 Blag it: Team nickname: The Chollima (a mythical winged horse) Most amusing player name: Kim Kum-il.. Drink it: National Drinks: Soju (a sort of potato vodka)... Cocktail: Bicycle (N. Korea has fewer than 1 car to every 1000 people, hence, bicycles are popular) You will need: Ice, 1/2 ounce elderflower liqueur, 1/2 ounce Yellow Chartreuse, 4 ounces Prosecco or cava, Lemon zest, for garnish (optional) Method: Fill a cocktail shaker halfway with ice, then add Hong Yong-jo, one of only two elderflower and Chartreuse and stir until well chilled. Strain N.Korean players who play abroad... into a cocktail glass and top with Prosecco or cava. Garnish with lemon zest, if using. Say: We Ha Yeo! Gun Bae!

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GROUP G: Ivory Coast Star player: Didier Drogba - forward. Expect: With a wealth of talent and admirable stamina (24-shot penalty marathons not a problem) expect speed, skill and no little entertainment. Odds of winning: 33-1 Blag it: Team nickname: The Elephants Most amusing player name: Boubacar Barry, the natural successor to Roary the Racing Car, surely. Drink it: National Drinks: Bangui (palm wine)... Cocktail: Pink Elephant You will need: 1 part white cranberry juice, 1 part vodka, 1/2 part raspberry liqueur (recommended: Chambord), 1/2 part Limoncello. Method: To a shaker full of ice, add all ingredients. Shake well and pour into chilled martini glasses. . Glass: Martini. Say: Sante! : (Sahn-tay)

Didier Drogba, looks a bit like my mate Nigel, although scores more goals...

Portugal Star player: Raul Meireles - midfield Expect: Perennial underachievers to go out with a whimper. Odds of winning: 28-1 Blag it: Team nickname: Selecção des Quinas (Team of five shields, referring to their flag) Most amusing player name: In the world of awe-inspiring one-word names, both Duda, Danny and indeed Nani have to be seen as disappointing... Drink it: National Drinks: Port Wine, Wine, Amendoa Amarga (almond liqueur)... Cocktail: Autumnal Equinox You will need: 2 oz port, 1 oz Grand Marnier orange liqueur, 1/2 oz amaretto almond liqueur Method: Pour ingredients into an ice-filled old-fashioned glass. Stir, and serve. Glass: Old Fashioned Say: Saude! : (Saw-ooh-de) 32

Raul Meireles, to be honest it was anyone but Ronaldo...


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GROUP H: Spain Star player: David Villa - forward. Expect: What we always expect from Spain, a team packed with world-class talent which never seems to deliver when it counts. Maybe this time... Odds of winning: 4-1 Blag it: Team nickname: La Furia Joja (the Red Fury) Most amusing player name: Boo. None. Drink it: National Drinks: Sangria, Sherry... Cocktail: Classic Sangria (makes 4 glasses) You will need: 3 1/4 cups ( 26 fl. oz) dry red wine, 1 tbsp sugar, Juice 1 large orange, Juice 1 large lemon, 1 large orange, sliced thin crosswise, 1 large lemon, sliced thin David Villa. Pin-up boy scores goal, crosswise, 2 medium peaches, peeled, pitted and cut into runs through rain... chunks, 1 cup (8 fl. oz) club soda Method: Combine all the ingredients except for the club soda in a large punch bowl or serving pitcher, mixing well. Refrigerate overnight. Immediately before serving, mix in the club soda for added fizz. Ladle into cups with ice cubes.. . Say: ¡Salud!/Salut! : (Sah-lud/Sah-lute)

Switzerland Star player: Alexander Frei - forward Expect: Classic 4-4-2 with considerable goal fire-power in Frei. Odds of winning: 200-1 Blag it: Team nickname: Die Eidgenossen (‘the Oath Comrades’ from the 3 cantons that formed Switzerland) Most amusing player name: Marco Wölfli - power to the people!... Drink it: National Drinks: Kirsch (refined cherry brandy), Marc (like grappa), Pflümli (plum brandy), Williams pear eau de vie (pear liqueur with a whole pear in the bottle, made by putting the bottle over the pear as it’s growing)... Cocktail: Rose Cocktail Alexander Frei - looks a lot like that You will need: 2 oz. French Vermouth, 1/2 oz. Kirsch, bloke who does all the rowing with 1/4 oz. Grenadine. that Ben Fogel... Method: Mix in a highball glass with or without ice. Say: Depending on where you are, Italian, French, German or Swiss dialects - Proscht! Sante! Salute! Zum Wohl! 34


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GROUP H: Honduras Star player: Carlos Pavón - forward. Expect: Standard 4-4-2 supplying Pavón and Internazionale’s David Suazo. Odds of winning: 1000-1 Blag it: Team nickname: Las Catrachos (from the name of General Xatruch’s troops who fought the US in the 1800s) Most amusing player name: Georgie Welcome. Ah, bless. Drink it: National Drinks: Licuados (milk/fruit smoothies), Flor De Cana Rum (also produced in Nicaragua & throughout central America)... Cocktail: Into The Blue You will need: 1 Measure White Rum, 0.5 Measure Blue Curaçao, 1.5 Measures Grapefruit Juice, Top up Soda. Method: Stir the Curaçao, White Rum and grapefruit juice together with ice in a mixing jug and pour with the ice into a highball glass. Top up with soda desired. . Carlos Pavón - ‘I’m a little teapot...’ Glass: Highball. Say: Salud! : (Sah-lud)

Chile Star player: Humberto Suazo Expect: Position as high up the pitch as possible in a 3-3-1-3 formation. Odds of winning: 66-1 Blag it: Team nickname: La Roja (the red) Most amusing player name: Waldo Ponce - surely no futher explanation required... Drink it: National Drinks: Pisco (grape liqueur), Chicha (fermented maize)... Cocktail: Pisco Sour ClasicoYou will need: 3 ounces pisco, 1 ounce simple sugar, 1 ounce lime juice, 1 egg white, Angostura bitters (2-3 Humberto Suazo, happily ignoring the call to be substituted... dashes), Ice cubes Method: Mix the pisco, lime juice, sugar syrup, and egg white in a cocktail shaker. Add ice to fill, and shake vigorously. Strain into an old-fashioned glass, and sprinkle the Angostura bitters on top of the foam. Serve immediately. Glass: Old Fashioned Say: Salud! : (Sah-lud) 35


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Stockists: CENTRAL CROYDON: • All Bar One • Bar Red Square • Bar Se7en • Beanos Records • Bedford Tavern • Black Sheep Bar • Brief • Bull’s Head • Clocktower (Tourist Info) • Dog & Bull • Eagle • Fairfield Halls • Goose on the Market • Gun Tavern • Green Dragon • Half and Half Lounge Bar • Loop Pool Bar • Milan Bar • Mojama • Natterjacks (St George’s Walk) • Royal Standard • Ship • Spreadeagle • Steelpoint Tattoo • Strictly UK (Tramms) • Surrey Cricketers • Tiger Tiger • Timebomb Clothing • Walkabout • Yates’s Wine Lodge EAST CROY: • Builders Arms • Glamorgan • Orchard • Oval • Porter & Sorter • Tramlink Info Centre • Warehouse Theatre WEST CROY: • Bird in Hand • Sims Tattoos • Davys Wine Bar • Forbidden Planet • Fox and Hounds • Windmill

Pick up your copy of Deep from any of these lovely places:

SOUTH END & SOUTH CROY: • Bodega • Croham Arms • Crown & Pepper • Crown & Sceptre • Earl of Eldon • Edge • Folly • Jalalis • Kays Off Licence • LA Fitness (Royal Oak) • La Spezia Deli (Old Pharmacy - Swan & Sugarloaf) • Laithwaite’s Wines (opp. Windsor Castle) • Peking Tasty • Purley Arms • Rail View • Red Deer • Rupali • Ruskin House • Sackville Gallery • Scream Studios • Stag & Hounds • Sth Croydon BR • Swan & Sugarloaf • Txt Bar • Treehouse • Unwins (Swan & Sugarloaf) • Wheelwrights Arms • Windsor Castle • Woodman • Zizzi ADDISCOMBE: • Alma Tavern • Claret Free Hs • Cricketers PURLEY: • Baan Thai • Brass Monkey • Coffee Bay (by Purley BR) • Elliott’s • Jolly Farmers • Las Fuentes • Rectory • Purley BR • Purley Pool • Purley Oaks BR • Station Cars

PURLEY WAY: • Gipsy Moth • Premier Travel Inn Hotel • Green’s Gym

Listings Index: What’s on? 37 full weekly and daily guide All our information was correct at the time of going to press, but as the only certainty in life is change, we suggest you check before heading out. The opinions and reviews which follow are those of the Editor and staff - if you have an issue to raise about them, please ring us, rather than the venue.

COULSDON: • The Pembroke OLD COULSDON: • The Fox • Tudor Rose

Got something going on? We’re not psychic, people - let us know! What’s on listings are FREE! Call Angela on 07910 506197 or e-mail: angela@deep-london.co.uk

SANDERST’D: • Sanderstead BR • Stones Hair Salon • Wine Cellar

Deep-London Readership: 25,002 monthly

SHIRLEY: • Cricketers • Crown • Sandrock • Shirley Inn • Surprise Inn FORESTDALE: • Forestdale Arms • McDermott’s Fish Restaurant SELHURST: • Pepperton UK • Selhurst Arms • White Horse • Two Brewers • Lion Inn THORNTON HEATH: • The Lord Napier WOODSIDE GREEN: • Beehive

plus online at www.deep-london.co.uk on facebook (deep-london), www.myspace.com/wiredmag, www.issuu.com, http://ski:im

GET YOUR EVENT LISTED: e-mail: ANGELA@ DEEP-LONDON.CO.UK

Last date for inclusion in July issue -

24 JUNE 2010 Advertising in Deep-London:

SOUTH NORWOOD: • Portmanor

Prices from £100 upwards depending on size and placement all prices are per month, full colour and VAT exempt

KENLEY: • Kenley Arms

discounts available for block booking etc

FREE advert design service

WHYTELEAFE: • Whyteleafe Tavern

To advertise please call Angela the Editor on: 07910 506197 / 020 8680 3558 e-mail: angela@deep-london.co.uk 36


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what’s on

Something to do every night of the week, Yay!

CAVEAT: Because of the World Cup and depending on the group stage reults, some events listed here may not happen or be subject to change. Please check with the venue if in doubt. Thanks! Every Day: • Art: Ronald Searle Until 4 July. An exhibition to celebrate Ronald Searle’s 90th birthday. Over 90 works by one of the 20th Century’s greatest cartoonists. The Cartoon Museum, 35 Little Russell Street, London, WC1A 2HH, 020 7580 8155 www.cartoonmuseum.org • Museum: East Surrey Museum Small local museum in Caterham. East Surrey Museum, 1 Stafford Road Caterham, CR3 6JG 01883 340 275 www.eastsurreymuseum.org

Every Monday: • Market: Surrey Street London’s oldest continuously running market since 1276, with fruit and veg, bits and pieces, meat and fish, hot food, all sorts. Monday - Saturday. Use it or lose it. Surrey Street, Croydon www.surreystreetmarket.com • Quiz: Green Dragon - NEW! Wendy’s marvellous pub quiz is BACK 8pm every Monday. Jackpot round! Green Dragon, High Street, Croydon • Sport: Roller Derby - NEW! St Georges Walk 6-8pm Ladies 18+ for skating. Ref's needed, can be male. For more info contact Dee on 07735 424823 or email croydonrollerderby@live.co.uk • Gay: Camp Bingo Hosted by Miss Isla Blige. Starts 8pm with various prizes. Happy Hour Drinks when you buy your books until the first number is called. The Bird In Hand, 291 Sydenham Road,

Croydon, CR0 2EL. 020 8683 3104 www.birdinhand.uk.com • Club: Blue Monday Buy one hour of Pool and recieve one hour free of charge. Don’t worry if you are on a one-hour lunch break - we will give you a voucher to use another day. If you are not a member you can join at reception free of charge if you bring some ID along. More about free membership. Half price on all drinks Monday to Thursday 5pm to 7pm Fridays 5pm to 9pm Open Midday until 11pm Admission is free of charge Dress Code: No caps, sportswear, or hooded tops. Jeans and trainers are permitted. Over 18s only - ID required. Loop Lounge, 12 Crown Hill, Croydon, CR0 1RZ. 020 8760 7000 www.looplounge.co.uk • Club: Half Price Mondays 50% off all drinks (excluding champagne) from 7pm til midnight. With music from The Katie and Alex Show. Free entry before 10pm. Black Sheep Bar, 68 High St, CR0. 020 8680 2233. www.blacksheepbar.com www.myspace.com/blacksheepbar

Every Tuesday: • Market: Surrey Street London’s oldest continuously running market since 1276, with fruit and veg, bits and pieces, meat and fish, hot food, all sorts. Use it or lose it. Monday Saturday. Surrey Street, Croydon www.surreystreetmarket.com • Music: Jazz Jam Session Every Tuesday Night at The Lord Napier Jazz Pub. All welcome. 37

The Lord Napier, 111 Beulah Road, Thornton Heath. 020 8653 2286 • Quiz: The Horseshoe - NEW! Wendy’s marvellous pub quiz travels to Warlingham every Tuesday from 8pm. £1 entry, table snacks, cash and wine prizes and new jackpot round. The Horseshoe, Farleigh Road Warlingham, Surrey CR6 01883 622 009 • Quiz: The Pembroke 8pm. 50p per person per round. Plus 2 for 1 on pizzas. The Pembroke, 12-16 Chipstead Valley Road, Coulsdon, CR5 2RA 020 8763 0800 • Quiz: The Builders Arms Fun general knowledge quiz. The Builders Arms, 65 Leslie Park Road, Croydon, CR0 6TP 020 8654 1803 • Club: BAR WARS These are the drinks you're looking for… Every Tuesday at Black Sheep, the drinks deals are a force to be reckoned with...£1 a pint of Carlsberg, Olde English, Tetley's & Gaymers Pear Cider, £1 house spirit and mixer, £1 shot of Sourz or Wild! FREE entry before 9pm! Doors 7pm. Black Sheep Bar, 68 High St, CR0. 020 8680 2233. www.blacksheepbar.com www.myspace.com/blacksheepbar • Music: Freedom of Expression presents the best in acoustic music, comedy, poetry and magic - see daily what’s on for who’s playing when. From 8pm. FREE! The Green Dragon, 58-60 High Street, Croydon, CRO 1NA www.myspace.com/greendragonpub • Fitness: Yoga Classes Every Tuesday from 7.30pm-9pm. £5 a


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what’s on class for 6 sessions. Beginners welcome. 140 Brighton Road, Purley. 0208 763 2629 • Dance: Belly Dancing Come and join the fun every Tuesday. Classes are for women only and suitable for all ages, sizes and levels of ability. Make sure you wear comfortable clothing and bring a scarf to tie around your hips to really get you in the mood! Open level - suitable for all 6pm7.15pm In depth class - suitable for experienced dancers only: 7.30pm8.45pm. £7 per class. Call Charlotte Desorgher on 01342 850423 The Green Room, Fairfield Halls, Park Lane, Croydon, CR9 1DG. Box Office: 020 8688 9291 www.fairfield.co.uk • Dance: Ceroc Learn to Ceroc every Tuesday in the Arnhem Gallery. Ceroc is an exciting and stylish modern partner dance which can be performed to all types of music. It’s very easy to pick up, no special clothes are required and you don’t need to bring a partner as we make sure everyone mixes together. Beginners: 8pm; Intermediate: 9pm Freestyle: 9.30pm-11pm Membership £2, Admission £6 For further info tel: 020 8466 5030 or visit: www.cerockent.com Fairfield Halls, Park Lane, Croydon, CR9 1DG. Box Office: 020 8688 9291 www.fairfield.co.uk

Every Wednesday: • Market: Surrey Street London’s oldest continuously running market since 1276, with fruit and veg, bits and pieces, meat and fish, hot food, all sorts. Use it or lose it. Monday Saturday. Surrey Street, Croydon www.surreystreetmarket.com • Sport: Roller Derby - NEW! Monks Hill Sports Centre 6:45-8pm Ladies 18+ for skating. Ref's needed, can be male. For more info contact Dee on 07735 424823 or email croydonrollerderby@live.co.uk • Pool: The Oval Pool Competition Every Wednesday from 19.30 hrs.

Something to do every night of the week, Yay! Balls and banter - a textbook night in the pub. £2 to enter, with cash prizes. The Oval Tavern, 131 Oval Road, Croydon, CR0 6BR 020 8686 6023 www.ovaltavern.co.uk • Quiz: Mike K’s General Knowledge Quiz From 9.00pm Mike K’s general knowledge quiz, non-members welcome! Caterham Club, 10A, Croydon Road, Caterham CR36QB • Quiz: Foxley Hatch Every Wednesday from 8pm. £1 entry per person - winner takes all. Maximum 4 on a team. The Foxley Hatch, Purley • Event: Talent Night Talent Night Open Mic. Every Wednesday. £200 prize! The Whyteleafe Tavern, 208 Godstone Road, Whyteleafe, CR3 0EE www.whyteleafetavern.com • Gay: Karaoke Every Wednesday. The Bird In Hand, 291 Sydenham Road, Croydon, CR0 2EL. 020 8683 3104 www.birdinhand.uk.com • Club: King Of Clubs Loop Lounge Poker Night: It's the standard Texas Hold’em format that we all know and love. This night is open to all Loop Lounge members. To register an interest and book a place at our tables please visit our website. Open Midday until midnight Half price on all drinks: Monday to Thursday 5pm to 7pm, Fridays 5pm to 9pm Open Midday until 11pm. FREE entry. Dress: No caps, sportswear, or hooded tops. Jeans and trainers are permitted. Over 18s only - ID required. Loop Lounge, 12 Crown Hill, Croydon, CR0 1RZ. 020 8760 7000 www.looplounge.co.uk • Dance: Dancercise Keep fit and meet new people at this fun and friendly beginners dance class. Come and join the fun every Wednesday. 7.30pm. £3.50. Central Court, Croydon Clocktower, Katharine Street, Croydon www.croydonclocktower.org.uk • Dance: Swing Patrol swing dance classes, 7pm, £5. The Green Dragon, 58-60 High Street, Croydon, CRO 1NA www.myspace.com/greendragonpub 38

Every Thursday: • Market: Surrey Street London’s oldest continuously running market since 1276, with fruit and veg, bits and pieces, meat and fish, hot food, all sorts. Use it or lose it. Monday Saturday. Surrey Street, Croydon www.surreystreetmarket.com • Tattoos: Walk-In Day No need to book in advance on a Thursday only at Sims, get there early! 11am-6pm Sims Tattoos, 69 Windmill Road, Croydon, CR0 2XR, 020 8684 6967 • Quiz: Two Brewers From 9pm. Two Brewers, 221 Gloucester Road, Croydon, 020 8684 3544 • Quiz: Crown and Sceptre From 9pm. Crown and Sceptre, 32 Junction Road, South Croydon, 020 8688 8037 • Quiz: Purley Arms Every Thursday.. Purley Arms, 345 Brighton Road, South Croydon, 020 8686 3792 • Quiz: JF Big Quiz £1 per player, win prizes, league points, and maybe cash in our Open The Box game! New teams always welcome. The Jolly Farmers, 7 Purley Rd, Purley Surrey CR8 2HA, 020 8660 2076 www.jollyfarmers-purley.co.uk • Club: ALT.X Rock / Metal / Alternative with DJ Tony X plus guests. Cheap Sheep drinks deals till 10pm, plus £1.50 shots of Jager all night! Free before 10pm, doors 7pm. Black Sheep Bar, 68 High St, CR0. 020 8680 2233. www.blacksheepbar.com www.myspace.com/blacksheepbar • Music: Live Blues Live blues at The Oval - see daily what’s on for who’s playing when. Every Thursday and Sunday. Bands start 8pm Thursdays, 5.30pm Sundays. FREE entry! The Oval Tavern, 131 Oval Road, Croydon, CR0 6BR. 020 8686 6023 www.ovaltavern.co.uk • Music: Live Jazz Check daily what’s on for who’s playing when. 8.15pm to 11pm. FREE! The Lord Napier, 111 Beulah Road, Thornton Heath CR7. 020 8653 2286 • Dance: Clog Dancing Free taster sessions for newcomers to


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what’s on try out some lively N.W. English clog team dances - wear trainers or similar footwear. Musicians with portable acoustic instruments always welcome too. PLEASE CALL BEFORE HEADING OUT, as some Thursdays this night is not on. 8.30 pm. FREE! Call 020 8654 5211/020 8657 4056 (eves.) for details United Reformed Church Hall, corner Enmore/Cobden Road, S. Norwood • Dance: Morris Dancing North Wood Morris Men are teaching Men's Morris to complete beginners on Thursday evenings at the Scout Hut in Purley Park Road at 8.15 pm and newcomers are welcome (first call 020 8668 1830) see www.northwoodmorris.org.uk • Dance: The South East London Lindy Hop Club Come and learn to dance Lindy Hop (Jitterbug) like they did in the 1940's. No partner required and Caron and Steve specialise in helping those with two left feet get together with those with two right. Doors open 7.30pm Beginners Class 7.45pm Intermediate Class 8.30pm Freestyle (practice) 9.15pm The Royston Club, 85 Royston Road Penge, London, SE20 7QW www.52ndstreetjump.co.uk • Club: HUSH HUSH - NEW! Each week Hush Hush plan to bring a strong line up of residents and special guests. We already have support from Jonathan Ulysses (Ulybug /Space Ibiza) www.jonathanulysses.co.uk, Kids Of Funk (Perverted Audio) and more. There won’t be any cheese, just the finest in house music! It's just time to start the weekend and keep it hush hush! Special guest DJs plus residents DJ Lewi, DJ Billnick, Ollie Killick Hush Hush drinks offers Double vodka & red bull £1.50 Bottle of wine (white or rose) £5.00 House spirit and mixer / shot £1.50 Bottle of beer / wkd / Smirnoff Ice £1.75. All other drinks half price (except champagne). Admission: 9pm until 3am £6 / £3 NUS and guest list R.O.A.R. Smart/Casual Dress. Strictly Over 18 years of age only; photo ID is required “Keep Thursdays Hush Hush” Loop Lounge, 12 Crown Hill, Croydon, CR0 1RZ. 020 8760 7000 www.looplounge.co.uk

Every Friday: • Market: Surrey Street London’s oldest continuously running market since 1276, with fruit and veg, bits and pieces, meat and fish, hot food, all sorts. Monday - Saturday. Surrey Street, Croydon www.surreystreetmarket.com • Music: DJs Every Friday Night The Folly, 13-15 Selsdon Road, Croydon, 020 8688 3920 • Music: Live Music Alternating live bands and karaoke every Friday Night The Bedford Tavern, 16 Sydenham Road, Croydon, CR0 2EF, 020 8688 2584 • Karaoke: Wheelwright’s Arms From 8.30pm every Friday night. Wheelwright’s Arms, 126 Southbridge Road, Croydon, CR0 1AF • Music: Oval DJs The regular Oval faves, plus guests, keeping Fridays funky. The Oval Tavern, 131 Oval Road, Croydon, CR0 6BR 020 8686 6023 www.ovaltavern.co.uk • Music: Live Music Every Friday night from 8pm. Plus 2 for 1 on Corona and Jacques. The Pembroke, 12-16 Chipstead Valley Road, Coulsdon, CR5 2RA 020 8763 0800 • Event: Wii Night Every Friday evening. The View, 188 selsdon Road, South Croydon, CR2 6PL, 020 8688 2315. • Music: Free Jukebox Fridays Pickachoon for nowt. The Red Deer, 279 Brighton Road, South Croydon, CR2 6EQ, 020 8688 5599. • Club: WTF? Four decades of Indie, Alternative, Electro and Punk hits with DJ Zoe Urchin. Cheap Sheep drinks deals till 9pm. Doors 7pm, free before 10pm. Black Sheep Bar, 68 High St, CR0. 020 8680 2233. www.blacksheepbar.com www.myspace.com/blacksheepbar • Music: Starsound Gold DJ playing all styles of music. from 7pm The Swan and Sugarloaf, Brighton Road, South Croydon 39

• Event: Whitechapel’s Trail of Terror A highly entertaining and informative tour round the East End hunting ground of Jack The Ripper with John ‘Creepy’ Chambers. CHECK THIS EVENT IS HAPPENING BEFORE HEADING OUT. www.myspace.com/ whitechapelstrailofterror 07507 391 706 • Photography: Camera Club Camera Club meeting in West Croydon every Friday night welcomes visitors and new members. Full programme of events including print/slide talks, portrait evenings, competitions, etc. Ample parking. Contact Colin on 020 8665 1678. Visit www.thorntonheathcameraclub.co.uk

Every Saturday: • Market: Surrey Street London’s oldest continuously running market since 1276, with fruit and veg, bits and pieces, meat and fish, hot food, all sorts. Monday - Saturday. Surrey Street, Croydon www.surreystreetmarket.com • Market: Garden Market The Alma Garden Market hopes to create a vibrant bustling market place in the large private courtyard of The Alma pub in Crystal Palace. It runs every Saturday with over 20 stalls selling plants & flowers, beauty products & treatments, exotic oils, olive oils, capers, strawberries, chocolates, jewellery, hand made cards, rugs, leatherwear, knitwear, deli produce & a wide range of arts & crafts from local artists, plus hot food and collectables - and the Jerk Chicken man will be there! 10am - 4pm The Alma, 95 Church Road, Crystal Palace, London SE19 www.thealmapub.com • Music: Live Rock Bands Every Saturday Night Portmanor, Portland Road, South Norwood, SE25 4UF, 020 8655 1308 • Music: New Orleans Jazz Quality live jazz every Saturday Night. From 8.30pm. £6 entry includes free raffle. Blackheath Hockey Club, Rubens Street, Sydenham, SE6 4DH (behind Old Rutland Pub) • Music: Various


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what’s on Live music every Saturday Night. The Surrey Cricketers, corner of Lower Coombe Street and West Street, Croydon. • Club: Linton Dance Bombs. Funk Rockets. BeatSeeking Missiles. Never Outgunned. Cheap Sheep drinks deals till 9pm. Doors 7pm, free before 10pm. Black Sheep Bar, 68 High St, CR0. 020 8680 2233. www.blacksheepbar.com www.myspace.com/blacksheepbar • Club: Tiger Tiger Tiger and Raffles Bar: with Capital FM Des Paul and Chris Brooks playing out the best in commercial party and dance anthems.Groovy Wonderland: 70’s and 80’s floor fillers. Club: Commercial House. Admission free before 10pm, £7 after. Guestlist free before 11pm, £5 after. Dress code: Dress to Impress - No Sportswear. Tiger Tiger, 14-16 High Street, Croydon, CR0 1GT. 020 8662 4949. www.tigertiger-croydon.co.uk • Music: Various Live music most Saturday nights. The Good Companions, Hamsey Green, South Croydon. 020 8657 6655 • Gay: Party Night With guest DJs. The Bird In Hand, 291 Sydenham Road, Croydon, CR0 2EL. 020 8683 3104 www.birdinhand.uk.com

Every Sunday: • Music: New Orleans Jazz Every Sunday 12.30 - 2.30pm at The Lord Napier Jazz Pub. Entry £2, dance floor, raffle, great atmosphere at one of the longest running Jazz Pubs in Great Britain The Lord Napier, 111 Beulah Road, Thornton Heath. 020 8653 2286 • Music: Live Jazz Lunchtime Jazz every Sunday from 1pm. See daily what’s on for who’s

playing this month. FREE! The Green Dragon, 58-60 High Street, Croydon, CRO 1NA www.myspace.com/greendragonpub • Music: Live Blues Live blues at The Oval - see daily what’s on for who’s playing when. Every Thursday and Sunday. Bands start 8pm Thursdays, 5.30pm Sundays. FREE entry! The Oval Tavern, 131 Oval Road, Croydon, CR0 6BR 020 8686 6023 www.ovaltavern.co.uk • Quiz: The View Every Sunday evening. The View, 188 selsdon Road, South Croydon, CR2 6PL, 020 8688 2315. • Quiz: Wheelwright’s Arms From 8pm. Wheelwright’s Arms, 126 Southbridge Road, Croydon, CR0 1AF • Quiz: Two Brewers Fun general knowledge quiz. From 9pm. Two Brewers, 221 Gloucester Road, Croydon, 020 8684 3544 • Karaoke: The White Horse Every Sunday Night from 7pm. The White Horse, 1 Selhurst Road, Selhurst, South Norwood, 020 8240 0948 • Music: Open Mic Musicians (all instruments) welcome. With one of our 4 fantastic hosts: Dave Mac, Rob Cushman, Neil Mac and Steve Bright The Jolly Farmers, 7 Purley Road, Purley, CR8 2HA, 020 8660 2076 www.jollyfarmers-purley.co.uk • Poker: The Alma Tavern From 6pm. The Alma Tavern, Lower Addiscombe Road, Addiscombe, East Croydon • Event: Whitechapel’s Trail of Terror A highly entertaining and informative tour round the East End hunting ground

of Jack The Ripper with John ‘Creepy’ Chambers. CHECK THIS EVENT IS HAPPENING BEFORE HEADING OUT. www.myspace.com/ whitechapelstrailofterror 07507 391 706

Got something going on? Let us know e-mail: angela@deeplondon.co.uk

What’s This? http://doiop.com/name Wherever you see a website address in our listings that has the prefix http://doiop.com (or has ‘bit.ly’ or ‘tinyurl’ in it) it means we’ve used an URL shortener to make it easier for you to visit sites (especially facebook event pages whose URLs are ridiculously long). The address given will still take you to the original site, be it facebook or wherever, it just makes it easier for you if you’re reading the mag and wish to type addresses into your browser to get more info etc. We know most of you know this, but some people have asked, so there you go. Thanks! 40


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what’s on Sat 05 June

Sun 06

• Sport: Wales v S. Africa Rugby Union International - 2.30pm • Sport: The Derby Flat horse racing from Epsom featuring The Derby. Live on the BBC. More info from www.epsomderby.co.uk • Sport: Lingfield Races Flat horse racing. Direct trains from East Croydon - entry deals available when buying your train ticket. Evening meeting. More info from: www.lingfield-racecourse.co.uk • Music: DJ Rob Delta 1st Saturday of the month. FREE entry! The Oval Tavern, 131 Oval Road, Croydon, CR0 6BR. 020 8686 6023 www.ovaltavern.co.uk • Music: Live Music Act tbc. Check website. The Jolly Farmers, 7 Purley Rd, Purley Surrey CR8 2HA, 020 8660 2076 www.jollyfarmers-purley.co.uk • CHARITY: Help For Heroes Charity Event With Godsized, Against The Flood, Mordecai, Plus Guitar Hero roadshow, demos, workshops and giveaways from loads of instrument/amp companies, Win a free Metallica signature Les Paul guitar! £5 - Starts at 1pm The Scream Lounge, 20 South End, Croydon, CR0 1DN www.myspace.com/screamstudios 020 8099 4624, 020 8686 5788 lounge@screamstudios.co.uk • Club: Rave at the Races Afterparty Derby Day Party. DJs James Murray, Lewi Five 0, DJ Competition Winner, MikeyO, George Smeddles. Admission 6.30pm until 4am Entry £5 before 10pm, more after Dress Code: No caps, sportswear, or hooded tops. Jeans and trainers are permitted. Loop Lounge, 12 Crown Hill, Croydon, CR0 1RZ. 020 8760 7000 www.looplounge.co.uk • Club: 13th Floor Club 5 hours of 60s garage, pop and psychedelia! FREE before 10, then a fiver! 21:00 - 02:00 The Albany, 240 Great Portland St, London, United Kingdom

• Music: Live BLUES Act tbc. Check website. Live Blues every Thursday and Sunday bands start 8pm Thursdays, 5.30pm Sundays. FREE entry! The Oval Tavern, 131 Oval Road, Croydon, CR0 6BR. 020 8686 6023 www.ovaltavern.co.uk • Music: Live Jazz Upstairs - FREE - 1-3pm The Green Dragon, 58-60 High Street, Croydon, CRO 1NA www.myspace.com/greendragonpub • Music: Sunday Jazz Lunch From midday until 4pm every Sunday, why not come down for a delicious roast dinner straight from the club’s acclaimed kitchens (not compulsory for entry but highly recommended!) and enjoy a couple of sets of laid back music from some of London’s best musicians and singers. Ronnie Scott's Jazz Club, 47 Frith Street, London W1D 4HT Box Office: 020 7439 0747 www.ronniescotts.co.uk • Music: FRANTIC PROMOTIONS PRESENTS: Godsized / Mordecai / Sworn To Oath / Mantra plus special guests Doors 7.30pm. Entry £5 Camden Barfly, 49 Chalk Farm Road, London - 020 7482 1268 www.myspace.com/franticpromotions • Event: Camden Green Fair London's largest free green event, held annually on the first Sunday in June in Regent's Park (midday until 7:30pm). Features green-audio stages, science and art crossover entertainment, comprehensive healing area, eco-futures careers and education area, a resource zone of the London Community Recycling Network (LCRN), Ye Olde Village Green scene, large children's area, speakers, workshops, campaigns, ethical marketplace, organic food villages, real beer, ale and cider bars, food and garden zone, animals and nature zone, giant pass the parcel, and the 10th anniversary of the BikeFest. See: www.camdengreenfair.org.uk • Club: Precious Sundays Bar se7en presents PRECIOUS SUNDAYS each and every Sunday night... Dj's on the night playing the best in UK GARAGE, FUNKY HOUSE, R&B, HIP HOP, BASHMENT and CLUB 41

CLASSICS: CLK (MTV BASELOUNGE), DEEZEL DEEJAY, KIPPA D PLUS SPECIAL GUEST HOSTS... 2-4-£5 DRINKS ALL NITE FREE ENTRY ALL NIGHT Please note smart trainers are welcome (no air bubbles) - No I.D No ENTRY Bar Se7en, The Arcade, High Street, Croydon • Music: Set The Controls For The Heart Of Croydon Live music from the resonance association - experimental electronic rock - www.trahq.co.uk gregorian - ritualist drone doom www.myspace.com/gregoriandoom spucktute - electronic mind terror www.spucktute.net. From 7.30pm. The Green Dragon, 58-60 High Street, Croydon, CRO 1NA www.myspace.com/greendragonpub

Mon 07 • Quiz: Wendy’s Wonderful Pub Quiz Pub Quiz with wonderful Wenders, 8pm, cash prize. The Green Dragon, 58-60 High Street, Croydon, CRO 1NA www.myspace.com/greendragonpub

Tue 08 • Comedy: Comedy Night with Gareth and 12 comedians, from 8.30pm. Every 2nd Tuesday of the month. The Royal Standard, 1 Sheldon Street, Croydon CR0 1SS, 020 8688 9749 - For more upcoming events, find us on facebook! • Music: Open Mic Every 2nd and 4th Tuesday of the month The Oval Tavern, 131 Oval Road, Croydon, CR0 6BR 020 8686 6023 www.ovaltavern.co.uk • Music: Freedom of Expression Acoustic music, poetry, all sorts. The Green Dragon, 58-60 High Street, Croydon, CRO 1NA www.myspace.com/greendragonpub

Wed 09 • Dance: Swing Dance Swing Dance classes upstairs, £5. The Green Dragon, 58-60 High Street, Croydon, CRO 1NA www.myspace.com/greendragonpub


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what’s on • Pool: Pool Competition New! Pool competition downstairs: win a £30 bar tab! The Green Dragon, 58-60 High Street, Croydon, CRO 1NA www.myspace.com/greendragonpub • Pool: Pool Competition Every Wednesday from 19.30 hrs. Balls and banter - a textbook night in the pub. £2 to enter, with cash prizes. The Oval Tavern, 131 Oval Road, Croydon, CR0 6BR. 020 8686 6023 www.ovaltavern.co.uk • Pool: Croydon 8 Ball American Pool Knockout Competition Test your pool skills every Wednesday with our new weekly cash prize competition that will also see players gaining ranking points to become Croydon’s number 1 pool player. 10 Week Ranking League, Cash Prizes, £10 Entry Fee. More info on the website. Loop Lounge, 12 Crown Hill, Croydon, CR0 1RZ. 020 8760 7000 www.looplounge.co.uk • Music: Live Music Act tbc. Check website. The Jolly Farmers, 7 Purley Rd, Purley Surrey CR8 2HA, 020 8660 2076 www.jollyfarmers-purley.co.uk • Music: Dirty Kneez Live music. The Ship, 47 High Street, Croydon, CR0 1QD. www.myspace.com/theshipofcroydon • Music: BIZARRE Live music. 9pm. The Jolly Farmers, 7 Purley Rd, Purley Surrey CR8 2HA, 020 8660 2076 www.jollyfarmers-purley.co.uk • Comedy: Comedy Night Pete Kermally Presents Comedy Night Don Bizwas, Juliet Stephenson, Jeff Leach, Jo Ogden, Johny Armstrong, James Gill, Madge Hooks, Alex Mahon, Elise Harris, Ruarri Barrat, 10 Stand up acts for Free!! This is the first of Scream's monthly comedy nights UPSTAIRS, Doors 8pm, Free Entry The Scream Lounge, 20 South End, Croydon, CR0 1DN www.myspace.com/screamstudios 020 8099 4624, 020 8686 5788 lounge@screamstudios.co.uk

Don’t forget to check out the weekly what’s on

Thu 10 • Sport: Fontwell Races Jumps horse racing. Direct trains from East Croydon to Barnham (near Arundel) - shuttle bus between Barnham station and the racecourse (£2 return), starting from 2 hours prior to the first race and returning immediately after the last. Summer Evening at the Races First Race: 6:30 pm Last Race: 9:00 pm www.fontwellpark.co.uk • Music: JC Moody & the Usual Suspects Five-piece piano-led blues swing band lay down the boogie law. Live Blues every Thursday and Sunday bands start 8pm Thursdays, 5.30pm Sundays. FREE entry! The Oval Tavern, 131 Oval Road, Croydon, CR0 6BR. 020 8686 6023 www.ovaltavern.co.uk • Music: The Brian Hetherington Jazz Band Listen or jive to the authentic rythyms of New Orleans. 8.30pm-11pm. FREE! Every 2nd and 4th Thursday of the month. The Lord Napier, 111 Beulah Road, Thornton Heath CR7. 020 8653 2286 • Club: Hush Hush Each week Hush Hush plan to bring a strong line up of residents and special guests. We already have support from Jonathan Ulysses (Ulybug /Space Ibiza) www.jonathanulysses.co.uk, Kids Of Funk (Perverted Audio) and more. There won’t be any cheese, just the finest in house music! It's just time to start the weekend and keep it hush hush! Special guest DJs plus residents DJ Lewi, DJ Billnick, Ollie Killick. Admission 9pm until 3am £6 / £3 NUS and guest list R.O.A.R. Smart/Casual Dress. Strictly Over 18 years of age only; photo ID is required. Loop Lounge, 12 Crown Hill, Croydon, CR0 1RZ. 020 8760 7000 www.looplounge.co.uk • Music: Training Icarus Live music. The Ship, 47 High Street, Croydon, CR0 1QD. www.myspace.com/theshipofcroydon • Music: We Lie Beneath, Black Despair, Designing Nightmares Metal Thursday We Lie Beneath, Black Despair, 42

Designing Nightmares (Metal/Deathcore), UPSTAIRS Doors 8pm, Entry £3 (Includes free entry to Black Sheep Bar) The Scream Lounge, 20 South End, Croydon, CR0 1DN www.myspace.com/screamstudios 020 8099 4624, 020 8686 5788 lounge@screamstudios.co.uk

Fri 11 • Sport: FIFA World Cup 1300 (tbc): Opening ceremony - ITV 1500: South Africa v Mexico - Group A. (Soccer City, Johannesburg) - ITV 1930: Uruguay v France - Group A. (Cape Town) - BBC • Music: Oval DJs The regular Oval faves, plus guests, keeping Fridays funky. FREE entry! The Oval Tavern, 131 Oval Road, Croydon, CR0 6BR. 020 8686 6023 www.ovaltavern.co.uk • Music: Live Music Act tbc. Check website. The Jolly Farmers, 7 Purley Rd, Purley Surrey CR8 2HA, 020 8660 2076 www.jollyfarmers-purley.co.uk • Music: DJ Night – Rock, metal & alternative The Ship, 47 High Street, Croydon, CR0 1QD. www.myspace.com/theshipofcroydon • Music: DJ BennyManyHats The Green Dragon, 58-60 High Street, Croydon, CRO 1NA www.myspace.com/greendragonpub • Music: Neil Mac Band Live music. 9.30pm. The Jolly Farmers, 7 Purley Rd, Purley Surrey CR8 2HA, 020 8660 2076 www.jollyfarmers-purley.co.uk • Music: Junkyard Choir, The Jonbarr Hinge (debut show!) plus more tbc (Alternative/Indie), UPSTAIRS Doors 8pm, Entry £3 The Scream Lounge, 20 South End, Croydon, CR0 1DN www.myspace.com/screamstudios 020 8099 4624, 020 8686 5788 lounge@screamstudios.co.uk

Sat 12 • Sport: FIFA World Cup 1230: South Korea v Greece. Group B. (Port Elizabeth) - ITV 1500: Argentina v Nigeria - Group B.


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what’s on

Please mention Deep-London when visiting venues... (Ellis Park, Johannesburg) - BBC 1930: England v USA - Group C. (Rustenburg) - ITV • Poetry: Twenty Years of Poetry Guest Poet, Ted Smith-Orr. Three events sparked off Ted SmithOrr's poetry career: Firstly: 'Envoi' Poetry magazine published two themed sets of five poems. A Northern poet asked Ted for "A few more of those little ones." which led Ted to write 33 poems in 3 days, resulting in both poets sharing a chapbook 'Once Below a Time' telling their different childhood stories. And Roger Bing, ex Features Editor of the Croydon Advertiser asking, at Croydon's Poetry Festival, "When is the book to be published" after Ted had read a few poems about his favourite team winning a famous game at Wembley, which encouraged him to write 'Charlton Athletic FC, The Greatest Team on Earth’, to form Creative Energy Publications and send him on a fantastic poetic journey. Ted has since published two anthologies of football poetry, Football Pure Poetry: For The Fan Who Has Everything and Football Pure Poetry: Return Match. A poet of football, childhood, nature and a Grimsby fisherman – it will be an entertaining event. Primary Room, United Reformed Church, Addiscombe Grove, Croydon, 2.30-4.00pm. £2.00. Bring your poetry to read and share. Contact Peter for further details; peter@poetsanon.org.uk, 020 8645 9956 • Music: Junk Time Party, Dirty Scavenger and Chamelion Live music - open til 2am. The Ship, 47 High Street, Croydon, CR0 1QD. www.myspace.com/theshipofcroydon • Music: DJ Rob Delta The Green Dragon, 58-60 High Street, Croydon, CRO 1NA www.myspace.com/greendragonpub • Music: Energy Live music. 9.30pm. The Jolly Farmers, 7 Purley Rd, Purley Surrey CR8 2HA, 020 8660 2076 www.jollyfarmers-purley.co.uk

Sun 13 • Sport: FIFA World Cup 1230: Algeria v Slovenia - Group C. (Polokwane) - BBC 1500: Serbia v Ghana - Group D.

(Pretoria) - ITV 1930: Germany v Australia - Group D. (Durban) - ITV • Music: Sam Kelly’s Station House Number one UK blues drummer Sam and his soulful, cookin' band bring a cool, funky groove to tunes in June. Live Blues every Thursday and Sunday bands start 8pm Thursdays, 5.30pm Sundays. FREE entry! The Oval Tavern, 131 Oval Road, Croydon, CR0 6BR. 020 8686 6023 www.ovaltavern.co.uk • Music: Live Jazz Upstairs - FREE - 1-3pm The Green Dragon, 58-60 High Street, Croydon, CRO 1NA www.myspace.com/greendragonpub • Music: Acoustic Sunday with Tom Janssen, Faye Milton, Alison Plant, Bygone plus more tbc (Acoustic/Spoken Word/Folk), In The Lounge Bar 7pm, Free Entry The Scream Lounge, 20 South End, Croydon, CR0 1DN www.myspace.com/screamstudios 020 8099 4624, 020 8686 5788 lounge@screamstudios.co.uk

Mon 14 • Sport: FIFA World Cup 1230: Holland v Denmark - Group E. (Soccer City, Johannesburg) - ITV 1500: Japan v Cameroon - Group E. (Bloemfontein) - BBC 1930: Italy v Paraguay - Group F. (Cape Town) - BBC

Tue 15 • Sport: FIFA World Cup 1230: New Zealand v Slovakia - Group F. (Rustenburg) - BBC 1500: Ivory Coast v Portugal - Group G. (Port Elizabeth) - ITV 1930: Brazil v North Korea - Group G. (Ellis Park, Johannesburg) - ITV • Music: Freedom of Expression Acoustic music, poetry, all sorts. The Green Dragon, 58-60 High Street, Croydon, CRO 1NA www.myspace.com/greendragonpub

Wed 16 • Sport: FIFA World Cup 1230: Honduras v Chile - Group H. 43

(Nelspruit) - ITV 1500: Spain v Switzerland - Group H. (Durban) - BBC 1930: South Africa v Uruguay - Group A. (Pretoria) - BBC • Music: Reptilia Live music The Ship, 47 High Street, Croydon, CR0 1QD. www.myspace.com/theshipofcroydon • Dance: Swing Dance Swing Dance classes upstairs, £5. The Green Dragon, 58-60 High Street, Croydon, CRO 1NA www.myspace.com/greendragonpub

Thu 17 • Sport: FIFA World Cup 1230: Argentina v South Korea - Group B. (Soccer City, Johannesburg) - ITV 1500: Greece v Nigeria - Group B. (Bloemfontein) - BBC 1930: France v Mexico - Group A. (Polokwane) - BBC • Music: Gordon Smith and Alan Glen Guitarist much lauded by John Peel and recorded on Blue Horizon is joined by Mr Glen on harmonica. Live Blues every Thursday and Sunday bands start 8pm Thursdays, 5.30pm Sundays. FREE entry! The Oval Tavern, 131 Oval Road, Croydon, CR0 6BR. 020 8686 6023 www.ovaltavern.co.uk • Music: The New Delta Big Band From Ellington to Herman, big band jazz at its best! 8.15pm to 11pm. FREE! Every 1st and 3rd Thursday of the month. The Lord Napier, 111 Beulah Road, Thornton Heath CR7. 020 8653 2286 • Music: The Meakins Live music The Ship, 47 High Street, Croydon, CR0 1QD. www.myspace.com/theshipofcroydon • Music: Carcer City, Silent Disguise, Monuments, Silhouette Of a Ghost, While She Sleeps with Tom Janssen, Faye Milton, Alison Terrorizer Grindhouse Presents Carcer City, Silent Disguise, Monuments, Silhouette Of a Ghost, While She Sleeps (Metal), UPSTAIRS Doors 7pm, Entry £5 The Scream Lounge, 20 South End,


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Don’t forget to check out the weekly what’s on... Croydon, CR0 1DN www.myspace.com/screamstudios 020 8099 4624, 020 8686 5788 lounge@screamstudios.co.uk

Fri 18 • Sport: FIFA World Cup 1230: Germany v Serbia - Group D. (Port Elizabeth) - BBC 1500: Slovenia v USA - Group C. (Ellis Park, Johannesburg) - BBC 1930: England v Algeria - Group C. (Cape Town) - ITV • Music: Oval DJs The regular Oval faves, plus guests, keeping Fridays funky. FREE entry! The Oval Tavern, 131 Oval Road, Croydon, CR0 6BR. 020 8686 6023 www.ovaltavern.co.uk • Music: Kitty Hudson and The 23 Enigma + support Live music - open til 2am. The Ship, 47 High Street, Croydon, CR0 1QD. www.myspace.com/theshipofcroydon • Music: DJ BennyManyHats The Green Dragon, 58-60 High Street, Croydon, CRO 1NA www.myspace.com/greendragonpub • Music: Bad Influence Live music. 9.30pm. The Jolly Farmers, 7 Purley Rd, Purley Surrey CR8 2HA, 020 8660 2076 www.jollyfarmers-purley.co.uk • Music: Ten Foot Nun & Los A fantastic alt-rock double header with Ten Foot Nun & Los. Croydon pronk rockers Ten Foot Nun play their forthcoming debut album in it's entirety. Sign up for a free copy at this gig only! Garge Moog/blues alt trio Los return to their growing Croydon fanbase for their first full length set. (Alternative/Rock), UPSTAIRS Doors 8pm, Entry £3 The Scream Lounge, 20 South End, Croydon, CR0 1DN www.myspace.com/screamstudios 020 8099 4624, 020 8686 5788 lounge@screamstudios.co.uk

Sat 19 • Sport: FIFA World Cup 1230: Holland v Japan - Group E. (Durban) - ITV 1500: Ghana v Australia - Group D. (Rustenburg) - BBC 1930: Cameroon v Denmark - Group E.

(Pretoria) - ITV • Music: Chamelion Band on after the footie. The Earl of Eldon, 63 Brighton Road, South Croydon, Surrey, CR2 6EE • Music: PJ da DJ The Ship, 47 High Street, Croydon, CR0 1QD. www.myspace.com/theshipofcroydon • Music: DJ Rob Delta The Green Dragon, 58-60 High Street, Croydon, CRO 1NA www.myspace.com/greendragonpub • Music: Rockturnal Duo Live music. 9.30pm. The Jolly Farmers, 7 Purley Rd, Purley Surrey CR8 2HA, 020 8660 2076 www.jollyfarmers-purley.co.uk • Music: Solid State (last show for a while) plus Base Mosquito Scream Lounge Presents Solid State (last show for a while) plus Base Mosquito (Hip-Hop/Rock), UPSTAIRS Doors 8pm, Entry £5 (inc free shot) The Scream Lounge, 20 South End, Croydon, CR0 1DN www.myspace.com/screamstudios 020 8099 4624, 020 8686 5788 lounge@screamstudios.co.uk • Music: Daughters Of Gaia Witchfest Rockz Presents Daughters Of Gaia (Alternative), DOWNSTAIRS Doors 8pm, Entry £tbc The Scream Lounge, 20 South End, Croydon, CR0 1DN www.myspace.com/screamstudios 020 8099 4624, 020 8686 5788 lounge@screamstudios.co.uk

Sun 20 • Event: Father’s Day I know what my Dad will be wanting see game 2 below... • Sport: FIFA World Cup 1230: Slovakia v Paraguay - Group F. (Bloemfontein) - BBC 1500: Italy v New Zealand - Group F. (Nelspruit) - ITV 1930: Brazil v Ivory Coast - Group G. (Soccer City, Johannesburg) - BBC • Music: Giles Hedley & the Aviators Nose harp aficionado and all-round Good Chap Giles brings the whole gang tonight and delivers his usual delta-fed passion and grit; backed up by the 44

powerhouse pairing of Richard Sadler on bass and skins supremo Sam Kelly.. Live Blues every Thursday and Sunday bands start 8pm Thursdays, 5.30pm Sundays. FREE entry! The Oval Tavern, 131 Oval Road, Croydon, CR0 6BR. 020 8686 6023 www.ovaltavern.co.uk • Music: Live Jazz Upstairs - FREE - 1-3pm The Green Dragon, 58-60 High Street, Croydon, CRO 1NA www.myspace.com/greendragonpub • Music: Acoustic Sunday with Outer Audio (unplugged) and Rob Cushman plus more tbc (Acoustic), In The Lounge Bar 7pm, Free Entry The Scream Lounge, 20 South End, Croydon, CR0 1DN www.myspace.com/screamstudios 020 8099 4624, 020 8686 5788 lounge@screamstudios.co.uk

Mon 21 • Sport: FIFA World Cup 1230: Portugal v North Korea - Group G. (Cape Town) - BBC 1500: Chile v Switzerland - Group H. (Port Elizabeth) - BBC 1930: Spain v Honduras - Group H. (Ellis Park, Johannesburg) - ITV

Tue 22 • Sport: FIFA World Cup 1500: Mexico v Uruguay - Group A. (Rustenburg) - ITV 1500: France v South Africa - Group A. (Bloemfontein) - ITV 1930: Nigeria v South Korea - Group B. (Durban) - BBC 1930: Greece v Argentina - Group B. (Polokwane) - BBC • Music: Open Mic Every 2nd and 4th Tuesday of the month The Oval Tavern, 131 Oval Road, Croydon, CR0 6BR 020 8686 6023 www.ovaltavern.co.uk • Music: Freedom of Expression Acoustic music, poetry, all sorts. The Green Dragon, 58-60 High Street, Croydon, CRO 1NA www.myspace.com/greendragonpub

Wed 23


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Don’t forget to check out the weekly what’s on... • Sport: FIFA World Cup 1500: Slovenia v England - Group C. (Port Elizabeth) - BBC 1500: USA v Algeria - Group C. (Pretoria) - BBC 1930: Australia v Serbia - Group D. (Nelspruit) - ITV 1930: Ghana v Germany - Group D. (Soccer City, Johannesburg) - ITV • Music: Black Days Live music . The Ship, 47 High Street, Croydon, CR0 1QD. www.myspace.com/theshipofcroydon • Dance: Swing Dance Swing Dance classes upstairs, £5. The Green Dragon, 58-60 High Street, Croydon, CRO 1NA www.myspace.com/greendragonpub

Thu 24 • Sport: FIFA World Cup 1500: Slovakia v Italy - Group F. (Ellis Park, Johannesburg) - ITV 1500: Paraguay v New Zealand - Group F. (Polokwane) - ITV 1930: Denmark v Japan - Group E. (Rustenburg) - BBC 1930: Cameroon v Holland - Group E. (Cape Town) - BBC • Music: The Brian Hetherington Jazz Band Listen or jive to the authentic rythyms of New Orleans. 8.30pm-11pm. FREE! Every 2nd and 4th Thursday of the month. The Lord Napier, 111 Beulah Road, Thornton Heath CR7. 020 8653 2286 • Music: John Crampton Hard driving, stomping National Steel delta attack and howling, growling vocals resulting in a focussed intensity that few can match. Live Blues every Thursday and Sunday bands start 8pm Thursdays, 5.30pm Sundays. FREE entry! The Oval Tavern, 131 Oval Road, Croydon, CR0 6BR. 020 8686 6023 www.ovaltavern.co.uk • Music: The 23 Enigma + support Live music . The Ship, 47 High Street, Croydon, CR0 1QD. www.myspace.com/theshipofcroydon • Music: The Safety Fire, Clarity plus more tbc Metal Thursday with The Safety Fire, Clarity plus more tbc

Prog/tech metal with a hardcore punch from touring band TSF and ace Croydon trio Clarity. UPSTAIRS Doors 8pm, Entry £3 (gets you free entry to the Black Sheep Bar before 11pm) The Scream Lounge, 20 South End, Croydon, CR0 1DN www.myspace.com/screamstudios 020 8099 4624, 020 8686 5788 lounge@screamstudios.co.uk

Fri 25 • Sport: FIFA World Cup 1500: Portugal v Brazil - Group G. (Durban) - BBC 1500: North Korea v Ivory Coast Group G. (Nelspruit) - BBC 1930: Chile v Spain - Group H. (Pretoria) - ITV 1930: Switzerland v Honduras - Group H. (Bloemfontein) - ITV • Club: Histree House Last Friday of the month. Old skool house. Open until 3am. Free entry for Treehouse diners (£5 otherwise) Upstairs, The Treehouse, 78 South End, Croydon CR0 1DP, 020 8688 9837 www.treehousepeople.com • Music: Oval DJs The regular Oval faves, plus guests, keeping Fridays funky. FREE entry! The Oval Tavern, 131 Oval Road, Croydon, CR0 6BR. 020 8686 6023 www.ovaltavern.co.uk • Music: DJ Night The Ship, 47 High Street, Croydon, CR0 1QD. www.myspace.com/theshipofcroydon • Music: DJ BennyManyHats The Green Dragon, 58-60 High Street, Croydon, CRO 1NA www.myspace.com/greendragonpub • Music: Stolen ID Live music. 9.30pm. The Jolly Farmers, 7 Purley Rd, Purley Surrey CR8 2HA, 020 8660 2076 www.jollyfarmers-purley.co.uk • Music: Guns n Roses Tribute with Guns 2 Roses plus Killing With Style . Putting to shame the lesser GnR tribute headlining this year's Reading. (Rock), DOWNSTAIRS Doors 8pm, Entry £8 (adv tickets available on ticketweb.co.uk)The Scream Lounge, 20 South End, Croydon, CR0 1DN www.myspace.com/screamstudios 45

020 8099 4624, 020 8686 5788 lounge@screamstudios.co.uk

Sat 26 • Sport: FIFA World Cup Second Round - TV channel tbc. 1500: Winner Group A v Runner-Up Group B 1930: Winner Group C v Runner-Up Group D. • Music: DJ BennyManyHats 4th Saturday of the month. FREE entry! The Oval Tavern, 131 Oval Road, Croydon, CR0 6BR. 020 8686 6023 www.ovaltavern.co.uk • Music: DJ Freeqboi and Cherrybomb The Green Dragon, 58-60 High Street, Croydon, CRO 1NA www.myspace.com/greendragonpub • Music: The Versions Live music. 9.30pm. The Jolly Farmers, 7 Purley Rd, Purley Surrey CR8 2HA, 020 8660 2076 www.jollyfarmers-purley.co.uk • Music: Alice Cooper Tribute Local boys The Alice Band bring showmanship and a career-spanning setlist to Scream UPSTAIRS Doors 8pm, Entry £5 The Scream Lounge, 20 South End, Croydon, CR0 1DN www.myspace.com/screamstudios 020 8099 4624, 020 8686 5788 lounge@screamstudios.co.uk • Music: Mad Mush & The Evidence, Wicked Wendy, Gallows Humour & more tbc Stagefrite Promotions Present Mad Mush & The Evidence, Wicked Wendy, Gallows Humour & more tbc (Punk/Rock/Indie), UPSTAIRS Doors 8pm, Entry £4 adv The Scream Lounge, 20 South End, Croydon, CR0 1DN www.myspace.com/screamstudios 020 8099 4624, 020 8686 5788 lounge@screamstudios.co.uk

Sun 27 • Sport: FIFA World Cup Second Round - TV channel tbc. 1500: Winner Group B v Runner-Up Group A 1930: Winner Group D v Runner-Up Group C. • Music: John Idan Group


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Don’t forget to check out the weekly what’s on... Michigan-born former Yardbird Idan and mates bring a diverse range of folk, rock and blues influence to bear in this bespoke interpretation of the genres. Live Blues every Thursday and Sunday bands start 8pm Thursdays, 5.30pm Sundays. FREE entry! The Oval Tavern, 131 Oval Road, Croydon, CR0 6BR. 020 8686 6023 www.ovaltavern.co.uk • Music: Live Jazz Upstairs - FREE - 1-3pm The Green Dragon, 58-60 High Street, Croydon, CRO 1NA www.myspace.com/greendragonpub • Music: Acoustically Speaking Eclectic Arts Network Presents Acoustically Speaking (Acoustic/Poetry/Spoken Word/Jam), UPSTAIRS Doors 6pm, Entry £5 The Scream Lounge, 20 South End, Croydon, CR0 1DN www.myspace.com/screamstudios 020 8099 4624, 020 8686 5788 lounge@screamstudios.co.uk

Mon 28 • Sport: FIFA World Cup Second Round - TV channel tbc. 1500: Winner Group E v Runner-Up Group F 1930: Winner Group G v Runner-Up Group H.

Tue 29 • Sport: FIFA World Cup Second Round - TV channel tbc. 1500: Winner Group F v Runner-Up Group E. 1930: Winner Group H v Runner-Up Group G. • Event: Meet The Brewer Meet the Dark Star Brewer. 7.30pm. Tickets from the bar (entry is free but must be booked) Half and Half, 282 High Street, Croydon • Music: Freedom of Expression Acoustic music, poetry, all sorts. The Green Dragon, 58-60 High Street, Croydon, CRO 1NA www.myspace.com/greendragonpub

Wed 30 • Dance: Swing Dance Swing Dance classes upstairs, £5.

The Green Dragon, 58-60 High Street, Croydon, CRO 1NA www.myspace.com/greendragonpub

Thu 01 July • Music: The New Delta Big Band From Ellington to Herman, big band jazz at its best! 8.15pm to 11pm. FREE! Every 1st and 3rd Thursday of the month. The Lord Napier, 111 Beulah Road, Thornton Heath CR7. 020 8653 2286 • Music: By Definition, Profane & The Sacred plus more tbc Metal Thursday By Definition, Profane & The Sacred plus more tbc (Metal/Stoner), UPSTAIRS Doors 8pm, Entry £3 The Scream Lounge, 20 South End, Croydon, CR0 1DN www.myspace.com/screamstudios 020 8099 4624, 020 8686 5788 lounge@screamstudios.co.uk • Music: Live Blues Act tbc The Oval Tavern, 131 Oval Road, Croydon, CR0 6BR. 020 8686 6023 www.ovaltavern.co.uk

Fri 02 • Sport: FIFA World Cup TV channel tbc. 1500: Quarter Final 1 1930: Quarter Final 2 • Club: Groove On 1st Friday of the month. Funk, Soul, Disco, Old Skool. Open until 3am. Free entry for Treehouse diners (£5 otherwise) Upstairs, The Treehouse, 78 South End, Croydon CR0 1DP, 020 8688 9837 www.treehousepeople.com • Music: Oval DJs The regular Oval faves, plus guests, keeping Fridays funky. FREE entry! The Oval Tavern, 131 Oval Road, Croydon, CR0 6BR. 020 8686 6023 www.ovaltavern.co.uk • Music: DJ BennyManyHats The Green Dragon, 58-60 High Street, Croydon, CRO 1NA www.myspace.com/greendragonpub • Music: Rik Martin Live music. 9.30pm. The Jolly Farmers, 7 Purley Rd, Purley Surrey CR8 2HA, 020 8660 2076 46

www.jollyfarmers-purley.co.uk • Music: Vintage Fly Oliver Sudden Presents Vintage Fly (Funk/Soul/Hip hop vinyl club night), UPSTAIRS, Doors 8pm, Entry £2 The Scream Lounge, 20 South End, Croydon, CR0 1DN www.myspace.com/screamstudios 020 8099 4624, 020 8686 5788 lounge@screamstudios.co.uk

Sat 03 • Sport: FIFA World Cup TV channel tbc. 1500: Quarter Final 3 1930: Quarter Final 4 • Music: DJ Rob Delta 1st Saturday of the month. FREE entry! The Oval Tavern, 131 Oval Road, Croydon, CR0 6BR. 020 8686 6023 www.ovaltavern.co.uk • Music: “All For One” Fancy Dress Party at the Ship with Stevie Ears & Pantera Gary. Pirates, Ninjas and Zombies. Dress to impress. The Ship, 47 High Street, Croydon, CR0 1QD. www.myspace.com/theshipofcroydon • Music: The Licks Live music. 9.30pm. The Jolly Farmers, 7 Purley Rd, Purley Surrey CR8 2HA, 020 8660 2076 www.jollyfarmers-purley.co.uk

Sun 04 • Music: Live Jazz Upstairs - FREE - 1-3pm The Green Dragon, 58-60 High Street, Croydon, CRO 1NA www.myspace.com/greendragonpub • Music: Live Blues Act tbc The Oval Tavern, 131 Oval Road, Croydon, CR0 6BR. 020 8686 6023 www.ovaltavern.co.uk

MORE EVENTS EVERY DAY AT DEEPLONDON FACEBOOK PAGE AND TWITTER FEED.


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world cup featured pubs - football friendly places • Crown and Pepper: All games shown. Indoor and OUTDOOR screens. Beer garden - half covered / half open. Garden heaters. Authentic fresh Indian / Chinese cuisine served from 12-10pm-ish. Shisha pipes. The Crown and Pepper, 242 High Street, Croydon, CR0 1NF. • Yates’ Wine Lodge: Every game shown. 4 large drop-down screens, 11 plasmas. Drink and food deals. Beer garden with heaters. BBQs. Mobile bars inside and in the beer garden. Booth hire available (bucket of bud & food included - ask at the bar for details). World Cup fun competitions running throughout, ask at the bar. Yates’ Wine Lodge, More details at www.weareyates.co.uk • Dog and Bull: Every game shown. Indoor 60” screen. Outdoor 40” screen (weather permitting). Outdoor bar and BBQ open for every match. Gourmet burger menu now available. Food and drunk offers and world cup competitions (ask at the bar). Kids welcome in the garden until 6pm - range of soft drinks available. Outdoor pool table, real ales. The Dog and Bull, Surrey Street, Croydon. • Oval Tavern: New TV for the World Cup! All England games and selected others shown with sound, the rest seen but not heard. World cup fun and BBQs. Great beer garden. live blues music, Djs and the usual Oval happenings icluding the big Sunday Roast The Oval Tavern, Oval Road, East Croydon.

• Riley’s Pool and Snooker Club Frith Road: Every game shown. 3 metre screen - the largest in South London! Free year’s membership for all customers watching the World Cup. Deals for pool and snooker - buy one get one free on table time. Drinks deals - 4 bottles of beer for a tenner, 4 pint jugs £7.95. Bar menu available all day. Air conditioned. Sponsored by Samsung. Riley’s, 1st Floor, 63 Frith Road, Croydon, CR0 1TB, 020 8649 7788 www.rileys.co.uk • Bar Red Square: Every game shown. Big screen projector. Table service. Food served all day. World Cup competitions running throughout ask at the bar for details. Smart casual dress code. Outside seating. Fri/Sat DJs - starting at 9pm. Bar Red Square, 63-67 High Street Croydon, Surrey CR0 1QE 020 8688 1020 www.barredsquare.co.uk • Wheelwright’s Arms: All games shown with sound. Live music before and after all England games. Footie themed cocktails, Carling £2.80, Guinness £2.90. Other special offers throughout (ask for details). Bar food always available. Large garden with large screen, BBQ. Kid-friendly - Every England game, kids get free Ice Cream and Squash. The Wheelwrights Arms, 126 Southbridge Road, Croydon • Earl Of Eldon: All games shown on 3 screens. Extra entertainments throughout the World Cup, ask for details. Bar menu available all day. Large secluded patio garden (see Beer Garden Detective) The Earl of Eldon, 63 Brighton Road, South Croydon, Surrey, CR2 6EE 47

• Royal Standard: All games shown on 2 screens. Fuller’s Real Ales - Chiswick £2.80, Pride £3.15. Large range of crusty rolls available for £1. Bar snacks. 16 question quiz after each England game - prizes for winner! Large garden. BBQs (weather permitting). Ask at the bar for full deatils of what we have going on. The Royal Standard, 1 Sheldon Street Croydon CR0 1SS, 020 8688 9749 • Lion Inn: All games shown. Normal food and special match-themed food served 12-9 on match days.Massive Sunday lunches just £5.50. Various drinks deals running throughout the cup. 5 Real Ales, 4 lagers, 2 ciders plus cask cider for the world cup. Outside seating. Disco every Friday night and karaoke every Sunday from 8.30 onwards. Lion Inn 182 Pawsons Road, Croydon, Surrey, CR0 2QD • Green Dragon: All games shown! We're a safe, family-friendly pub. 5 big screens; and air con. We'll have buckets of Bud for a tenner and masses of food deals on burgers and combos. Full talbe service during England games. We'll be adopting Italy as well with Peroni and a pizza for a fiver during Italy games. We have Table Football, so we'll be doing a table football league during the tournament, we've also got a sweepstake and a raffle going on. The Green Dragon, 58-60 High Street, Croydon, CR0 1NA. • Red Deer: All games shown on 8 screens. Bar snacks available World cup deals and competitions. BBQs. Outdoor seating. The Oval Tavern, Oval Road, East Croydon.


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world cup featured pubs - football free zones • Ship: Football free zone. Sat 12th June Band Festival. Music and non-football events running throughout the world cup. Band festivals, band nights, DJs. Beer offers, wide range of traditional cask ales. New summer menu. Air conditioned. See what’s on for full listings. The Ship, 47 High Street, Croydon, CR0 1QD. www.myspace.com/ theshipofcroydon. • Tree House: Football free bar, restaurant and club. Summer menu now available - NEW Bar Meze menu. Daily specials. Traditional roast every Sunday from 12 til stocks run out! Beer garden. Jugs of sangria / Pimms now available along with a selction of beers, fine wines, cocktails. Upstairs club open til 3am Fri/Sat free entry for diners (£5 otherwise). The Treehouse (and Upstairs), 78 South End, Croydon CR0 1DP, 020 8688 9837 www.treehousepeople.com

• Scream Lounge: Football free zone. Music every night of the week. See what’s on for full details. The Scream Lounge, 20 South End, Croydon, CR0 1DN. www.myspace.com/screamstudios • Cricketers: CAMRA Croydon and Sutton Pub Of The Year. Ales include Harveys, Hophead, 4 rotating microbrewery ales. plus lager, wine spirits etc. Food served 12-7 every day. Legendary curries! Beer garden - patio and grassed, with kids play area. Wildlife garden. Car Park. BBQ. Dartboard. The Cricketer’s, 47 Shirley Rd, Croydon, Surrey, CR0 7ER • Glamorgan: All fresh food restaurant and pub. Discover the authentic taste of South Africa. We are now serving crocodile, ostrich, babotie (summery, savoury mince dish). SA biltong and chilli biltong bar snacks. South African

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wine, Savanna cider & more. Monthly South African BBQs (Braai). Real ales including Harveys, Summer beer and guest beers. Beer Garden See advert for opening times. The Glamorgan, 81 Cherry Orchard Road, East Croydon Croydon CR0 6BE 020 8688 6333 • Green Dragon: While the footie goes on below, the upstairs of the Dragon is a football free zone! The Green Dragon, 58-60 High Street, Croydon, CR0 1NA • Half and Half: Football Free zone! Croydon’s finest purveyor of Belgian and exotic beers. Meet the Dark-Star brewer - June 29th, 7.30pm. Tickets from the bar - entry is free but must be booked in advance. The Half and Half, 282 High Street, Croydon, CR0 1NG.


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News-hound May contain news.

H

ello again, and we start this month with comfirmation of something we told you last month, the The Damned are indeed playing at this year’s Croydon Summer Festival hurrah! Also confirmed, as we mentioned last month, are Martha and The Vandelas - ace! It seems Transglobal Underground was a bit of a premature announcement, but instead they’ve got The Lightning Seeds, so let’s hope England are still in the world cup by then for a rousing rendition of ‘Three Lions’. Full lineup details and all the other info you need will be here next month. Now the ever regular Boot-Led Zeppelin news! You may recall last month we gave you a heads up as to their Fairfield gig on 17th June. Well, if you haven’t got your tickets yet can I suggest you get a shift on as I reckon they’re about to become very, very popular after a triumphant appearance (two, actually) on the live edition of BBC2’s ‘I’m In a

Rock’n’Roll Band’ a couple of days ago. If you didn’t see it, it’s on BBCiplayer. I gather it was a bit nervewracking for all the chaps, but they pulled a blinder. Well done to all involved. More on that next month I suspect. In Springwatch news, it appears The Oval’s outdoor BBQ area/gazebo has become home to a blackbird nesting in the rafters. By all accounts it’s not in the least bit phased by smoke, noise and general pub shenanigans, although it’s not keen on people peering into its nest taking pictures, which is a perfectly reasonable attitude, we reckon, so if you go down there and see it, don’t do that. In World Cup news, there have been rumours circulating that there’s some sort of ban on England shirts. Well, I have it on the highest authority that this is, not to put too fine a point on it, a load of old bollocks, so everyone who’s joined one of The Damned those vitriolic facebook groups, Boot-Led Zeppelin

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or become consumed with rightous indignation, please, get over yourselves and just enjoy what promises to be a brilliant carnival of footie, I thank you. Lastly a bit of self promotion news in that Deep have started a new wheeze - from now on, every day, we’ll post a featured event, or two, or sometimes three, up on our facebook page (deep-london) and our new twitter feed (@deep_london). These won’t only be things in the mag, but stuff that’s come in after we’ve gone to print or that no-one told us about until the day before (you’d be amazed), so follow or friend us up for daily updates, news and other stuff which occurs to us during the month. Right, that’s it, see you next month. Got news? E-mail: angela@deep-london.co.uk. Ta!


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Septuagenarian agony aunt cum rock mutton Auntie May terrorises some foreign types. . .

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elcome back one and all. This year, Edith and I decided to break with tradition (tradition being that we don’t have a holiday unless Ian Gillan invites us down to his boat in Lyme Regis, which he has now rather inconveniently and inconsiderately sold) and have a week in Abroad. I left Edith to do the booking, with instructions that there should be sun, sea and lots of young men to torment on the beach. I have to say she came up trumps with a week in Corfu, which was mainly Abroad, except in the Red Lion which was like

paid-for bit behind in the packet. Half an hour later I had acquired a nonnutritious basket of pork pies, crisps, plasters, carnations and custard creams - and was being tailed by a threatening looking security guard. And talking of shopping, I had reason to pop into the new Sainsburys the other evening and was persuaded to use the RCG (Replacement Cashier Gizmo) to pay for my shopping. I would normally avoid such atrocities on the basis that they put people out of jobs but relented in this instance because I’ll try anything once. All was

This month I’ve become highly excited at news of the resurrection of the ancient Croydon tradition of ‘Knob-Lobbing’... being in Coulsdon before they pulled it down (the Red Lion, not Coulsdon itself). We quickly acquired matching lilos and spent long lazy days attempting to paddle to Albania (my lilo had explicit instructions NOT to use it as a boat, but nobody tells me what to do, least of all a fucking airbed!) I did find an uninhabited island (well OK it was a rock) which I commandeered but got bored quite quickly as there were no subjects to boss about and nobody to help me colonise it. What Edith had failed to tell me was that it was Tribute Act Week so I was forced to sit through endless nights of dubious quality Lady Gaga, Cher, Amy Winehouse and Meat Loaf acts. Edith added another Elvis to her score (she’s trying to get into the Guinness Book of Records for snogging the most Elvis impersonators) while I smiled becomingly at Napoleon the barman in exchange for free shots. We returned to Blighty more or less penniless so we’ve been trying to shop economically. While topping up my tan in the chemist cleverly using the 50% free part of a can of fake tan, I wondered whether I could do a nutritious week’s shop with only the “extra free” food on offer, leaving the

well until the damn machine informed me politely that there was an “unexpected item” in my bag. Of course, I was mortified. How on earth did it know that I had taken my PHP (Personal Happiness Provider) for a service? And why did the spotty shop assistant boy collapse in a fit of giggles when I waved the offending item in his face? I’m planning a revenge attack by hacking into their systems and replacing the software with a Random Compliment Generator, voiced by Gok Wan, which spouts things such as “Oh my days! You’ve lost so much weight”, “Those shoes do wonders for your posture”, and “You’ve had your hair cut – what an original look”. Elsewhere, I was highly excited to discover the resurrection of the age-old Croydon tradition of ‘KnobLobbing’. Many of 50

you may not have heard of it but traditionally a wooden phallus-shaped stick is thrown (or “wanged”) over a bridge, the one which travels the furthest being judged the winner. This used to happen in the “Bog Island” area of Croydon but somebody has taken the liberty of draining the bogs and building a flyover in the way so it has been located to the new footbridge in Surrey Street Market and, for safety, the wooden knobs are being replaced by gingerbread ones. This year’s event is due to be held during the afternoon of the August Bank Holiday and I’ve been reliably informed that a Facebook page will be set up to publicise the event. I was wondering whether “wanging” could possibly explain the origins of the word “wanking” – after all the success of both operations depends largely on how you hold the aforesaid item. And on that note I must leave you for another month. Keep an eye on the listings pages and I’m sure you’ll find me being propped up at various pubs and bars around Croydon. Auntie May returns next month.


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The Deep London Massice celebrate Towel Day in honour of Douglas Adams, the Palace Massive make themselves heard at the Palace protest. The Squirrel Massive makes the leapof faith to the window-mounted bird-feeder.

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