Wichita Northwest High School Ursus 1988 104p

URSUS

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Northwest High School

r88 URSLIS

A Literary Magazine Edited by Wichita High School Northwest's Creative Writing Class

Vol. 10 Wichita High School Northwest 1220 N. Tyler Road Wichita, Kansas 67212

1988 URSUS STAFF KRISTEY COMER AMY COX

VINNIY MCDONALD IDONA OFFUTT QIJINN OPPENHEIMER CHUCK RAY

ANGELADAVIS DARLENE DOUTHITT KRISTEN EMMEL

JULIERILEY

JENI.IY GEORGE

JOHN SKELTON

DANIELLE IIEDLUND KACEY KIRK

KENDALL SIVIITH AUDREY TROWBRIDGE

FACULTY ADVISOR MRS.PATTYBRANT

COVER DESIGN SHAWN TAYLOR

Disclaimer The literary and art works submined to the 1988 UR SUS are to the fullest lnowledge of the saff original in their content and design. If any works within this anthology are plagiarized, the staff denies knowledge of that fact and so denies responsibility for the act and its publication.

Open the door. . to the experience of LIFE,

Photo by Jason Cook

The Season

My favorite place was the hill behind my house in Waukesha, Wisconsin. My memoryof it, asthe seasons changed, is stillvivid in my mind. ln the spring, as the hill was coming to lile, my lriends and lwould pack a lunch and climb upthe hillinto another world, our world. We followed the path a neighbor had made with his riding lawnmower to the very top, careful to avoid the large pink and purple thistles that threatened to pierce our bared legs. Once we reached the top, we settled down on our worn blanket, through which the grass inched its way, sending us into a scratching rampage. Wewere surrounded bythe sweet smell ol new life and freedom. All around, wib flowers were exploding into brilliant rainbows of color. Our thoughts, lost in the

Whistling of winds ln the cold, Nights and days of falling snow.

Though it only comes once Every year, this is the Right season for holiday cheer.

Tina Burns

fluffy clouds floating calmly in the brilliant blue of the alternoon sky, were dampened only slightly by the trail of a jet plane high in the river of blue.

As spring faded into summer, June into July, the hill became a throne surrounded by splashes of bright color in the night sky. Thus our nation's lndependence Day was my favorite time to be on the hill. I felt as though I could reach up and become partof the spectacularcolors that rained down on us.

As fall rounded the corner, the hill created firey colors of its own. This was the time of year the hill was most

beautiful. As lwalked on the now well-worn path up the side ol the hill, I could

hear the dry leaves crumble under my leet and the rustling of the animals that would make the hillside their winter home. An occasional breeze sent some of the brightly- colored leaves to the ground, where they would become part of the hill's rich soil. As I made my way to the top, I brushed againt the sandpaper-like bark of my lavorite tree. Looking down at the neighborhood below, I could see the green of the grass giving way to dull brown, which would soon be covered with fluffy, white snow.

Soon the snow was deep enough for tobogganing.

We often climbed the hill, walking through sometimes waist-high drifts of snow. The sun shining down on the snowy hill made it almost too bright to look at. The bare tree branches were heavilyweighted down by snow and icicles. We alljumped on board the toboggan, setting off quickly down the hill, avoiding the talltrees. The snow blew in our faces as a rabbit scampered out ol our path.

Thethick blanketof fluffy snow remained untilthewarmth of spring canrc, and once again the hillwould restart its cycle of life.

Footprints in the Sand Footprints of mine, left behind on the beach.

Wondering if the tide, willtake them to sea.

Do they know that they're mine?

Only time willtell if lwill be remembered by my lootprints left behind.

- Tiffani Grimes

My Freedom It lifts the air; sailing through every part of my body.

I come alive with rhythm and sound.

It sinks in every pore; as I listen, not only with my ears.

My mind lets go;and lets emotion take place.

I am free; in a world of music.

- Michelle Reynolils

Jd E,

4

Adolescence Adolescence is....... a time for dreams a time lor hope, a time when you make

room for laughter.

A crazy time, a mind-boggling time, a time to discover life and your self.

It's a time to live, a time too cry.

This is the time we choose the path we walk forthe rest of our lives.

- Heather Bradford

4 AIone Alone all alone up here I see people hear people Even touch them.

Alone in a city

of millions Alone in my mind.

- Mark Sirnpson

Belore time when African veldts gave birth to allthe animals ol the world and jungles painted the earth green and sent trees to the heavens, lhere lived the most beautiful bird, the Vulture. She had ebony stones set in

golden eggs for eyes. Her silky plumage was a lush brown and when the sun hit it just right the rich btue tint

in the center of of her feathers could be seen. Her crimson crest contrasted with her ivory beak. A thin white edge outlined her finetailfeathers. Glossy black scates covered her feet. The Vulture stood alone in beauty.

How she got to be so colorful, no one knew but even lhe proudest creature was humbled when the vulture went by and all of the animals envied her, execpt one, lhe Hyacinth Macaw, a dull gray parrot. The Macaw didn't care about anything. She just sat in her nest all day and studied the huge rainbow in the white sky.

Every morning the Macaw would go to the river and look at herself . She was very big, the largest of all parrots and the other birds said she was ugly. The were so ashamed ol their sister bird that they buitt her a nest high in a Yellow Satinwood tree. She paid them no mind, took the nest, and went on about her business.

Allthe birds lorgot about the Macaw until alter the big rain whenthe colored bow sent bluewaterdownto shade the ocean. Allthe birds ranlorshelteras the first droplell execpt the Macw who flew down from her nest to the ground below. Thinkingthe rainwouldf lood the land and take her away with it, she huddled close to the ground as the rain drenched her gray plumage. lt rained and rained and rained but it did not f lood. Soon the rain stopped and the birds came out from their shelters. When they saw the Macaw they were amazed. The rich blue rain had colored her feathers. The birds adored her but the Vulture who saw how dull she looked compared to the now brilliant Macaw was outraged. She marched up to the Macaw and struck herdownwith her mighty claw and started to pluckthe featheraround the Macaw's eyes and down her chin. When the other birds saw the savagery of the Vulture they pulled her off the Macaw. Seeing'inat justice must be done unto the Vulture, the birds plucked her crimson crest and blood ran down onto her ivory

was her silky plumage and her golden eyes. Her tears turned into white moles and her head remained featherless just as half of her beak reamined blood stained. No living creature would speak to her or be in her company.

As forthe other birds, they ptayed in the cotored rains that came down from the sky. First the peactock, then the Emerald Cuckoo, next the Flamingo and soon all the other birds of the world.

beak. Then they ripped off the black scales on the Vu lture's f eet. The only remaining beauty the Vu lture had

Photo by Angela Davis

This story begins long, long ago, before Christ, before wars, and before humans, aswe knowthem, exhisted. ln this time, was a big, beautiful rock, fullof blue waters and green earth with a sun shining bright on it every day of its existence. lt all was so gorgeous. But then something happened. Two and four-legged creatures began pop'-

ping up everywhere. ln the begining these creatures were okay, everything was plentiful and every creature had what it wanted. But as time went on more things changed. These creatures realized they could get more thanthey needed andtherefore makethembetterthan all the rest of the creatures. Well, the other creatures didn't take too kindly to this and uprising began. Ditterent kinds of creatures split and went different ways, always hoping to lind something that was betterthan what allthe other creatures had. This creature competition went on and on and on for millions ol years, and even though many of the

creatures did not gel along, many things were discovered. Many great things. But there were these two large pieces of land, known as nations, who each had an equal amount of power and weapons, but they could never see eye to eye on anything. And between the nations would be almost unbearable. Finally one day, all the little creatures on each nation looked into the sky and saw thousands upon thousands of missiles flying over their heads and each smiled at one another because each creature knew that once again there would be peace in the world as it was in the begining.

The End.

Photo by Angela Davis

I

don't know where to begin, but l'lltell everything. This

is the best advice; it's coming f rom experience. I have no

excuses and nothing to blame. lt's my lault and no one else's.

I was thirteen when I bought my first joint. tf I had known what wou ld happen to my life in the coming years, I wouldn't have done it. I started to buy more pot plus a lot of other things (l didn't even know myself what half of it was).

When I was in the eighth grade, I drank excessively, so much that it made me sick. I would bring booze to school anddrink itwheneverl could. I reallythought I was so coolbut lwas really stupid. I had to stealthings and then sellthem to get money to support my habit. My setf esteem was going down the drain, so I started getting high more to make the bad feelings about myself go away.

ln ninth grade I smoked a quarter of pot almosl everyday. I knew I was heading fast into something I

could never get out

of

. I was depressed and locked up

inside, and I thought the best bet was to die. I tried to kiil myself by hanging myself from the top of a bunk bed. The belt broke, and it was alucky thing because now I have helped so many with my story.

Getting high made so many problems. I was grounded everydayof theweek, everyweek. lhated life when lwasn't high. I had so many emotions and to me they got in the way. When I was in school I was either asleep or stoned. I blamed my f riends, my mom, anyone I could. I've learned now the blame should've been on me. I locked the door to even God; he just couldn't get through. I did not care.

You know I keep wondering why my mom never suspected my drug use. She preached about it, teiling my it was a dangerous act. When I look back, I wish I would have listened. What she said was absolutely true.

The hardestthing I ever hadtodo wastotell my momthat her little girlwas and is a drug addict. After I told her she was silent and then she just burst into tears. I love you mom, I never meant to hurt you.

I realize now what a big mistake I made, and with some help l'm slowly knocking down my wall and letting out those feelings that have been locked up so long. l,m a drug addict and learning more about myself everyday. lf you're in trouble and aren't sure what to do, you can get the help you want and need. Don't ever be afraid to talk.

Just take life one day at a time.

The Name I've heard the names of stereotype, I've been placed in quite a few, a low life, a drugee, a stoner, and yes it all is true.

ladmit l've made mistakes though God hasn't passed me by, So look at me and see me for what I am because I hold the hand of Jesus now, He has never passed me by.

God has forgiven me now and so can you if you find it in your heart yes, you can forgive me too.

So look beyond what I used to be and judge me only for what you see

-Chris Layton

The Seashore Sand all along the sea H appiness tills the air when you're with me, Opening up our hearts lo one another.

Revealing my secrets to you and no other, Everyday I long to be lree like you, o' sea.

Warm summer evening Sun lies down between the ctouds and rests till morning

Karen R. Clark

Tina Burns

Photo by Mike Edwards

Dawn to Dusk Sun beating down on the hot sand U ntil the darkness of night Makes it cool again; Morning sky being clear and blue, Evenings are filted with fun things to do, R iding along the beach on horsebact< witn you

Tina Burns

Jake had always been the trouble maker, one who always had the spotlight, yet so caring he could get anyone to smile. He understood everyone's needs.

While fulfilling other's needs, he would get exactly what he wanted in the process.

November 7 ,1984, three years ago my brother went into the hospital. He went in on a Wednesday, two weeks before my birthday, to have surgery done. By Thursday he was feeling pretty healthy, considering he just had an internal surgery. Friday he started to get worse. So I decided I would go and see him; il anyone could cheer him up it would have to be me. I was so excited I could hardly wait to see the only human in the world who could understand me. Jakie always made me happy; we understood each other so well. I ahruays knew what was up his sleeve and what to say with him. I went into that room, took one look at him, and became speechless. For once in my life I had no idea what to say. I was shocked.

The whole time lwas there I sat and read a book. I could not think of anything to say. My mind was completely blank, and when it was time to leave, I lust looked at him and squeezed his hand, nothing else.

The next morning he was doing better. Relief. His temperature was down. Mom decided that alter spending three days she would get some lresh air, go out. She went lo Towne East, but not more than a few hours;the hospital called her back in. At the time, I was home with alriend of the family. The phone rang at 4:41 . lanswered it. lt was mom, but she would not talk to me. She kept insisting on talking to her lriend. I knew then that it was bad news.

As soon as we got there, several nurses directed us to the room mom told us to meet her in. Everyone was waiting in the staff's lounge. Shortly afterwards, I excused myself and went to the powder room. I knelt there,

crying, pleading, and praying. No mater how hard I prayed, I could neverget rid of the feeling;Jakie had died.

A tremendous lump was left in my stomach as I left the powder room. Each step I took toward the lounge seemed longer and longer, as though I was going through a never-ending process. As I looked around the corner, I saw a long line of doctors standing in the lounge door. NO! Maybe there's another lounge, maybe this is a dream, maybe... Please dear God, no!!

Jakie died Saturday, November 10, 1984 at 6:00 p.m.

He was buried Wednesday the 14th. One week later,

November 21,1984, was my 13th birthday. I continued waiting that day for some little squirt to jump out and say, "Surprise, Happy Birthday!" Some litile monkeyto tellme it was all a big joke. No one ever did...

Confusion Confusion

rules my mind What should ldo? ls there a Santa Claus?

Where do clouds live?

I

Am I babbling? don't know.

Who cares?

I don't.

Do you?

Obviously.

Sleep brings peace.

Except for dreams.

Which I store in my heart.

Untiltomorrow.

Childhood was innocence.

Sand boxes, puppy dogs.

No worries, no fears.

Confusion is nonexistent in childhood. lwish lwas a child again.

Help, I don't know. .

.

I'm scared.

- Stephanie Fuqua

11

Here I sit, at the edge of my bed in total darkness. I want lo die. I don't want to be here anymore. Why can't ljust die? Why...

He's gone. I can't believe it. Gone forever. l'll never see him again. Never...that's too long. Why did he have

to die? Why can't l? Please! Someone-help me.

What's happening to me? What do I do now that he's

gone.

Why did he go out with those guys in the lirst

place? They're 'the druggies" and he knows it. He'd never had a drink before then. Why did he start. I don't understand!! Someone help me, PLEASEI! He must

have outdrank everyone in the whole bar. Why did those jerks have to pick him to corrupt. Why couldn't they have left Terl alone? Why my Terl?

Ithought everything would be okay alter he admitted he'd been drinking and we decided he would quit with my help. Talk about being naive!

The next night we had a date at seven o'clock. Seven came and went...seven thirty...eight. I was pretty mad. l've known him to be half an hour late or so, but this hour stufl was ridiculous. He never showed up that night; he didn't even call! lwent to schoolthe next day, mad. How could I have been so stupid not to realize something was wrong.

He wasn't at school. l, in my sellish stupidity, only got more upset. I came home from school in an extremely angry mood. I went straight to my room, slammed the

door and started on my homework.

When dinnertime came, I wasn't hungry so I kept doing my homework. I was having a hard time keeping my mind on my homework. My thoughts kept turning to Terl.

Around seven, my dad came into my room and told me there was a phone callfor me. I told him I was very busy and he informed me it was Mrs. Kraylont, Terl's mother.

"And she's crying," he added.

I raced upstairs to answer it. I had gone through the whole day being selfish, not once imagining Terl was dead. Itookthe phonelrom my motherand said, "Hello?"

It was his mother and she was definitely crying. I don't remember her actualwords, but as soon as I hung up, it hit me;Terlwas dead. ltold my parents quickly and said I was going to bed.

I ran into my room, locked the door and turned off the

lights. lt's been two hours since I came in here, but

it

seems like an eternity.

Why did those guys have to get drunk last night? Why did they have to be going down the same road Terlwas?

Why did they have to hit him?

Will someone please tell me what now? Am I supposedto go on living a normal life? Betteryet-am I really supposed to go on living?

Help me-anyone-please.

Prisoner of Myself I am trapped within a cell; and the cell is really just mYself .

Only I hold the key, that is able to set me lree.

It's so easy; just put the keY in, turn it and, live again.

But what's easier yet is to stay in my cell, not coming in contact with anybody else.

So lor now a prisoner lwill be; until I lind the courage to set myself free.

Audrey Trowbridge

12

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The Moon Illustration by Shawn Taylor

The light and shadows playing games with me.

The moon's light shimmered with motion so lree.

The water rolled over in a monotonous way as if the gentle wind wanted nothing but play.

The whispers in my ears of tiny things one cannot see,

told me with wisdom, this was the best place to be.

As I saw the first pink ray fading the moonlight away, lfelt sad for a moment my pale lriend could not stay.

Goodbye my friend, look forward to seeing me.

For I'll be here tomorrow to see your light so free.

Miohollo

Posnnlio

13

The Sunset As I sit on the beach in the warm sand' I look at the sunset above the ocean in awe' The clouds in the skY streak A brilliant Yellow and orange' Reds andbbes mix to lorm purple images' nioft pinX cascades upon the blue of the sky' nstimb continues, the colors blend together Forming a collage.

The rellection of the sunset waves' Sits upon the calm, undisturbed, rippling ocean the off Although the breeze ls slightlY cool,

the warm sand tingles

mY body'

The rhythm of the waves sings a lullabye' And thb seagulls tune in with solt harmony' The sunset lades awaY' guitne memory of the beautiful sight continues'

-

Anissa Rhea

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Illustration by Shawn TaYlor

14

Forever you are Agonized

ln L i

V i

n g

Failure

IFE not re awl an ri

Failure

Depressing, Maddening Screwing up royally Why must it be...

Scary?

dr

- Elmo v

c i

r

c I

e

o

f

- Elmo

Anger Hot, Firey Raging, Frustrating, lsolating Saying words you don't mean

Anger

- Stacey Fisher

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Illustration

by John Skelton

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To Whom

15

It May Concern

by Jenny George The true definition of Law - all the rules of conduct established by the authority.

Today's definition of Law - a rule made to be broken-to hurt and kill and never abide by.

Do you understand what I am saying? Can you feelthe pain that I feel? Those who are hurting us with their wrongs, torturing our love - killing allthat we have made and worked for allof our lives.

Bringing the bitterness, hatred and anger into ourworld

thatwillbe apartof everydayand night and ourchildren's as well.

Doesn't anyone care what this world is coming to?

Hasn't anyone a heart? We are being destroyed by criminals, the unreasonable, and those who just don't understand that they are killing themselves, those we love, and you and me. They are people who ruin our lives - our chances to live. And most of all to love, and to be loved.

We are all responsible for what is happening to this place we call "earth." But the unfairness is the lact that we

Rude People Rude people with their smiley grins, Bude people with their stuck-up chins, Rude people irrritate me, Rude people are not my cup of tea.

Thank-you's and smiles they are without, Rude people are insecure and fullof doubt Manners and politeness pass them by, My, oh my, they make me want to cry.

The difference could be found in a kind reply, Or possibly a warm hello or good-bye.

But, no, these people haven't a clue, As to what makes life enjoyable for me and you!

Angela Madden

are being hurt and punished by those who don't care about anyone. We willall lose those that we care about to the cruel actions of these people.

As I close this there is just one question I want to ask.

When willwe all love each other and always do what is right?

I didn't think I could get an answer lor that question. don't think I ever will.

Signed, Scared and in pain

I

Screams Heard in the First Light Screams heard in the first light Another victim of young men's play ls lying in a ditch lnnocent and young, Subject to cruelties untold Left by a road with marks for The world to see upon her She crawls to her knees Eyes blinded by tears ol rage And no one knows What becomes of the demon That ravages the helpless ones.

Justice screams at its own impotency The system leers its false security Some of us know Some of us cry out in the darkness too Tortured by black memories and evilsecrets That threaten the sanity within our minds.

Mari

Ries

16

A normalday began again as it had so many times before. A quarrelwith my brothdr and a complaint to my molher. The stress began to grow as the day began to progress. I felt the need to talk to my triends, but I could not utter a word. lnstead I let myfeelings of hurt and hate swell up inside of me like a balloon. That night a pin touched and burst that balloon filled with emotions.

Something someone said or did triggered me and I rushed forth like waterfrom a dam. lt could have been my parents telling me to do this and that. Or maybe my brother wouldn't share so things weren't even steven.

Could it have been a bad grade at school and the pressure for good grades beginning to grow? Maybe I just couldn't hold it inside ol me any longer. Whatever caused it, I will always remember the effect. lwas home alone, then it happened! ldropped everything and warm water filled my eyelids. Then lor a moment, just one rnoment I glanced at the drawerwhich contained all of those shiny razor-sharp blades. lmmediately the thought of "getting away from it all" entered my contused head. Relief, no more pain, no more suffering, and freedom f rom all problems was contained in that tiny drawer.

It would be so easy. I would be helping my parents. Or would l? True they wouldn't have to yell at me, but what about their feelings? I was confused and ran to my soft bed and threw my lrail body across it. I then let my feelings of hurt and hate llow from my heart through the warm drops until my pillow was saturated.

Then I began to think. To take my own life would be easy, but would it really solve problems or just cause more? Allol the sudden something popped into my circling head. lthought,'You? You of all people, why would you want to end your own life? You are healthy, you have a lot of friends, a roof over your head, food, clothes, a loving family, a lob and the list goes on. So why? Why do you want to end it all?"

It all made sense now. I was just leeling sorry for myself. I felt like I was the only person in the whole world with problems. I was so busy worrying about my problems that I didn't open my eyes to reality and see all of the good things in my life. Now I know that the good outnumbered the bad. Self-pity, suicide, it's no laughing matter!

17

Amy From her aching heart, comes the cry of Pain.

People cant tell it's there, but to me she makes it Plain.

I wish she only knew, it doesn't have to be this waY. But in her mind she knows,

it

willonly happen

asain.

I see it build inside her, the hatred that she feels, to me it was only a dream, now I see it's real.

normal, day, when it willcome to an end.

She always cries because ol it, people don't understand why. lf only you could stand in her shoes, and see it through her eyes...

I care so much about her, I hate see her hurt, and I pray God brings fast the day, She thinks it's only she sees it happen to her friends, she doesn't think there'll be a

The Silent

SOb

Tears A child's sobs.

Bruises Cover her body.

She tells no one.

Threats Hang over her head; Don't tell.

Terror Rules her mind.

She tells no one.

Broken limbs are easily explained.

Stairs She lelldown them.

She tells no one.

that her mother quits beating her.

helpless, do, dies, you."

Her mother says, "l hate you."

Time and time again.

To her that's line now, She didn't ask to be best friends.

She really is quite It's nothing she means to Once she'd lo';e to hear, before she from her mother,"l love

It's sad to look at the situation, from the viewpoint of I ask one thing, that you take time to pray, lor the child and her mother.

another.

Look around and find those hurting, don't give up the cause lo some olher, and learn to care about the ones, who could never say,"l love you too, Molher."

- Ge Zax

Eyes

Have a haunted look.

Never Does she laugh.

She tells no one.

Death Happens one day.

"Accidental" Was the cause.

She told no one.

- Stephanie Faqua

18

Illustration by Mike McGtothlin Design chosen to appear on the B-l Bomber

19

Infantry Standin'on a hilltop, there's lire all around calling in another mortar round! lnlantry The mighty lnfantry, we willfight from the trenches, we're the Iirst line of defenses, lnfantry,

the mighty lnfantry!

You hear the choppers coming, they're llying all around, your hopin'that the next one's homeward bound! lnfantry,

lhe mighty lnfantry, we willlight from the trenches, we're the lirst line of defenses, lnfanlry, lhe mighty lnfantry!

You walk among the dying, you see a friend or two,

you're hopin'that the next one won't be you!

lnfantry lhe mighty lnfantry, we willfight from the trenches, we're the first line of defenses, lnfantry

lhe mighty lnfantry!

You walk among the victims, their faces, they are strong, you're hopin' that this war won't last long! lnfantry,

lhe mighty lnfantry we willlight lrom the trenches, we're the first line of defenses, lnfantry,

lhe mighty lnfantry!

Pvt. Anthony loseph Clark

I watched him step out ol the mist that could have been fog or even smoke lrom a recent battle. We were eerily alone in the silence and light cast long, lonely shadows. I couldn't tell if it was dusk or dawn: it didn't

matter. The combination of illumination and obscurity

made his figure seem distant, shapely visible, yet vaguely undef ined. ltwas a disquieting experience to see him at that moment of pausing, his head swiveled to the left and his gun, a deadly automatic, pointed to the earth in staunch resolution. I wondered partly in that unfrozen part of my mind if he was listening to a far olf noise, perhaps a snapof atwig orthe chatterof gunfire, or if hewas a sentry, proudly and silently guarding the lives of his buddies. What was he doing here, in this place? I asked myself, but the question merely chased itself around inside my head as I continued to watch him watch the world. He was dressed in camoflage, his helmet protruded weeds and leaves, and his leeves were rolled up.

The rest, a darkened grey, was undistinguishable in the weak lighting. I couldn't tell if he was the enemy or my ally, so I kept low and watched. And he watched. Perhaps we were watching each other and he was thinking the same things lwas. Who is that? Do lfire? Where's the rest of the platoon? v.'5at do I dc? ln the distance, barely seen, trees rose tallto greet the partial glow from the mist and the sun. Orwas it the moon that shone so brightly? I didn't care. I didn't because the soldier belore me had a gun and u.ras watching. But I had a gun too, and I vras watching.

20

Me I want to be different.

What people call "unique" To find individuality ls something I seek

Yet lwant to fit in And be like my friends To do the latest thing And keep up with the trends ls it possible to do both?

And to have it all? l'm trying to lind out For it's driving me up a wall.

To be diflerent Yet be the same People don't know it But it's just a game.

- Kristey Comer

Who is She? Who is this woman Standing in front of me Does she feelwhat I feel Can she see what I see?

Always bubbling Yet serious, too Deep, deep thoughts For her are nothing new She works hard to accomplish Everything she does is "class" Revealing little of her luture And almost nothing of her past A Iigurehead, one would assume But more than that, I feel Somewhere in the deep recesses Some part of her must be real She keeps her feelings hidden Secluded is her soul Leaving only glimpses of emotion Traces to make a whole She keeps her manner mild And modulated, as a lady should

And yet I sense a danger Beneath that pristine layer of good.

Self-absorbed into her own little world The truth may never be unfurled.

Crysania

Why am I shy? No matter how long or hard I try, I cannot f igure out why. Sure, many people are shy, and some even know why, but not L So, why? Why am I afraid to approach people and begin a conversation?

Why can't I go up to a boy I like and just say "Hi!" Why am I af raid to raise my hand in class and answer a question

when I know the answer? Why do I always wait for someone to talk to me or call on me before I utter a sound? Why does my face turn red and my hands begin to shake when I have to give a speech in class? Why? Could it have to do with the way I was raised? you know, the "do not speak untilyou are spoken to" philosophy. Maybe it was some chitdhood incident that scarred me for life. Could it be caused by moving eight times throughout three states and changing schools six times?

Maybe I'm just af raid of lailure or rejection. I guess lf igure if I don't say anything, it can't be wrong, and if it can't be wrong , ldon't have to be embarrassed. Oh well, maybe it's just all in my head, and there is no deeper meaning, but then again maybe there is.

Well, believe it or not, I think l finaily know why I am shy. I now think that it is plain to see that I am shy because shy is me!

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22

Slowly, ever so slowly time passed, on its endless way to inlinity. She stared about her room. Her mother nagged her too much. Anger flared up, and became a sinking rock in her stomach.

Sure it was tough, she thought. lt's hard to get along since Daddy left; but that doesn't give her the right to tu rn into a nagging leech. Nowonderhe left. Grudgingly, she straightened her room, just enough to make her mother get off her back.

She sat on the chair by her bed and cried. She loved herdaddy more than anything. He didn't mind if her room looked like a trash heap, but he didn't like it. She kept it up just for him, but he was gone. He just left. Her mother knew why, but would not tell her; she probably knew where he was.

The phone rang. She flinched, but didn't move. Her mother never lel her answer it. She stood by the door and listened intently. 'lust stop calling! I told you, she doesn't want to talk to you! She hates you." Her motherslammed down the phone.

She was glad that it was just one of her mother's boylriends and not her father. She could imagine how much itwould hurt herdaddy if he heardthat load of trash.

She pulled back into her room and quietly shut the door.

The phone rang again and her mother's voice could be barely heard answering it. She went to the door and listened.

"Hello." Her mother snapped angrily. Her tone softened. "Oh hi Carla. Sorry, but Denise's father just called," A pause. "Yeah, he won't stop bothering me. He keeps wanting to talk to her."

She slammed the door. Her mother had lied. She was telling Daddy that his own daughter hated him. She could imagine how he mustfeelafter hearing that. lf he believed her mother, he would be hurt honibly.

She jumped onto her bed and cried again. Her mother opened the door.

"Denise honey," she said, sitting beside her and smoothing her hair back.

Denise recoiled as if she had been touched by acid.

"Go away!" she screamed. "l hate you! Go away!"

Her mother knew Denise could be quite violent when provoked enough, a trait she got from her father. Her mother left the room.

She looked at her watch and seemed rather surprised. She rushed out of the house. Denise listened to the car rush i ng away and a dead silence encompassed the house. Denise slowly made herwayto her mother's room.

She paused at the door, listening. Very slowly she

went in, every creak sounding amplified. She crossed the room to her mother's desk, sat down in the chair and sifted through the desk. She wasn't sure what she expected, but it certainly was not what she found.

There was a huge bundle of letters addressed to her from herfather, allopened. Taped to a shelf was a piece of paper. ln her mother's large handwriting, the note told her why her mother had left.

'Child Custody Court Feb. 2, 4'.30 sharp!"

Denise looked at the clock on the wall, it was 4:15.

She grabbed the stack of letters and raced down the stairs. She ran through the kitchen then backtracked to the phone. She rapidly dialed a number.

"Hello?" A lemale voice bubbled from the other end.

"Suzi? Thank God. lt's Denise. I need a ride to the court house, like now," she said.

"Why? Your mother in jail?" Suzi asked.

"My daddy, he and Mother are going to have a custody battle." "l'm on my way." The phone clicked.

Suziwas like that, she wanted to be a detective and was always interested in things like that. A few minutes later they were on their way. With the way Suzi drove, Denise was surprised they made it alive.

Suziwas haggling with a police officer who had been chasing them forspeeding. Denise bolted into the courthouse clutching lhe stack of letters.

"Hey, you can't go in there!" a security guard exclaimed, barring her way. She could faintly hear what was going on in the courtroom.

"Ms. Winter, where is your daughter? She was suppcsed to be here for these proceedings. Her opinion is necessary," the judge said.

"She's sick; she has a high temperature and is throwing up," her mother replied.

Denise told the security guard who she

was.

He

looked slightly shocked, and she took advantage of it and rushed into the courtroom. She caught sight ol her mother lrowning deeply. She was furious, but then she saw her father.

"Daddy!" she shouted, herfury gone. She ran towards him. She hadn'tseen herfatherinoverayearand he had changed. She hugged herfatherand became aware of the judge yelling for order.

"Are you Denise Johnson?" the judge asked.

"Yes, and lwant to be with my daddy," she said.

"Ms. Winter, you lied under oath. You will be tried tor purjury at a later date. Due to the circumstances, lwill rule in favor ol the father. Mr. Johnson, you are awarded

custody."

23

Risk You can dance, take a chance Go where you have never been, Glows like fire, burns like strife, That was living, now is life.

First you'll scream, then you'lldie, Try to laugh, maybe cry, You'll never know untilyou try.

Human Life Human life is so unusual we hurt and kill, but never feel.

It seems sometimes we are so cold And have no heart when really we were just playing a part ln one of those funny little plays That we keep inside ourselves Hidden away on some dark shelf.

Why we must hurt others I have yet to figure out They say,"love thy brother" But nobody listens to that old cliche lnstead they act like animals on the prey.

Hunting down the enemy That's allthey care about Always that feeling ol insecure doubt

-Ame

Broken hearts are moving parts ln this world don't you know, Take a step, try and see, Go where you would never be.

You can leap, and maybe lly, Start to laugh, then you cry, Life is living when you try.

- Kendall Smith

The Bdge of Reality The edge of reality is neither a time nor a place it's more like a leeling the thrillof the chase nothing is impossible where the world is upside down the sound of silence a mountain, a mound sanity escapes me at the edge of my soul like a taunting vision it leaves me cold though at the same moment in my veins there's a fire a burning thought a wanton desire darkness sunounds me and then there is a light 'the morning sun awakens me from my phantasmic flight

- Shawn Taylor

24

Stewart carefully buttoned up his grey unilorm. With each button, his heartbeat pounded louder in his ears.

His mind raced, but his eyes remained steady. He realized he was staring at a portrait of his older brother Richard. Richard, 1 9, had followed hisfather intothewar

Stulling a blanket into his duffel bag, Stewart began to think about the war. Walking miles in the hot sun with all of his belongings on his backwas not something he could identify with. He thought of crouching in a cold trench

a yeil ago. Two weeks ago Stewart had watched his

the life out of a stranger in a blue uniform the way the

mother read a letter telling them that Richard had died a hero. At that moment Stewart had known he had to go to war - lor Richard. Stewart had to stick it out because that was what Richard would have done. The portrait of

kickback in the rif le knocked the wind out of him. Stewart didn't like thinking of that. He would rather be worrying about his lirst year in high school and taking Mary Lou Simpson tothe Snowflake Dance. He justwantedto drive the carriage to church on Sundays and to outrace James McKinley and his horse. Was that too much to ask?

At 15, Stewart thought he was a man. He had done a lot of growing up in the past year, too much, his mother had said; and men went to war. Stewart slung his bag on

Richard was on the fireplace mantel. His mother had moved it f rom her dresser to its place now on the mantel

when she had gotten the letter about Richard. Their f ather's picture had been movedtothe mantelayearago.

That was the year Stewart and his horse had laken second in the county carriage race. His father had wanted to be there.

Stewart began to think of his mother. Who would take care ol her now? He knew it would be hard for her when all she had left were portraits on the mantel.

trying to sleep and f iring a bullet that would surely knock

his shoulder and straightened his cap. He kissed his mother goodbye. Without looking back, he marched into the war.

Three weeks later, Stewart's molher gently placed his portrait on the mantel.

Photo by Christina Pristed

25

Photo by Mike Edwards

Alone in the Rain

Undertow He lay in agony for an unknown time.

The pain swelled and swirled, Rising and lalling in floods That crashed against the sands Of his resistance.

The tidal rushes sapped his strength and dragged him away From the shores of life and light.

The sea was determined to have him.

Velvet foam saturated his senses, Submerged his thoughts, Stealing his willto survive.

Bising panic added to the torrent Until he lost his grip And was sucked into the bottomless pit Of oblivion, and death.

I guess I have lost everything l've been fighting for.

Tears, anger, and hatred I can't take any more.

Yesterday's smiles forgotten with age

Hearts once filled with love,

Are now filled with rage.

I know their secrets, they try to hide I know what they're feeling, they're crying inside.

Sadness fills my heart.

Where can I cry where no one can see.

Alone in the rain as sad as can be.

- Botonis

- Quinn Oppenheimer

The Sky That Was Never Blue Children so young, children so old.

The world is changing too quickly for the eye to see.

Mountains of steel, valleys of dying tree.

The day is longer than the night.

Women and men are being born When lhey're only children.

Children from glass homes.

The clouds cry on life, and then life turns to death.

Leaving behind a skeleton, the naked earth.

So much wasted, so much beauty never seen.

It's there, just forgotten.

The oceans ol blue and grass of green, Willturn to colors we have never seen.

The world cries for help, Becoming a weaker and weaker cry each day.

I feel so sorry for the children of tomorrow Because their parents are the children of today.

We take the breath of what gives us life.

We take the llame from the fire. lf the world power doesn't shine We won't be seen from the sky that was never blue.

- Botonis

27

Photo bY Angela Davis

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29

Sotto Voce The wind comes, Blows the grain.

Bends it.

Moves it.

Batters And seduces it.

But the grass is constant,

it,

Like the wind.

And when the wind stops blowing, The grass remains Stilland waiting.

A lighter must wait like that

Foracause,aneed, A purpose in which to fight.

Without the wind, The cause, He has no motion, No direction.

Therefore he is graceless, And freedomless.

Waiting patiently for the wind.

- Quinn Oppenheimer

The Time Continuum To wish ls to dream To dream ls to hope

To hope ls to try To try ls to reach To reach ls to learn To learn ls to experience

To experience ls to know To know ls to believe

To believe ls to feel To feel ls to care To care ls to love

To love ls to be one With everyone

- Crysania

30

October 9, 1987 I

lound this entry in one of my old iournals:

November 17, 1981 My l2thbirthday. After schoolDanny and Steve and Keith and me went up Harkinsons Hill. Steve pulled out a pack of Marlboro's and ofte red me o ne. l didn't wan na, but since Dan was there ltook one. Dan says it's real cool. Allthe girls like it, he says. lt was awful. I couldn't breathe and thought I was going to die. But I tinished it. ot Danny Myers. t'm not sonna took,,:

:r:"_r_,:* ll I only knew then what I know now. How stupid! How I went to the doctor incredibly ignorant! To explain

-

today. I've written earlier about how l've been coughing.

It's gotten worse. Especially after I smoke. I should have knownwhat itwas. Maybe I diddeepdown. But I ignored that little warning light going otf inside me and that little voice that was saying, "Man. You're screwing up. Too much smoking. Ever heard the saying, 'Better quit while you're ahead, buddy?"'

Doc says its some kind of cancer. A big long name I couldn't even spell. lgotta have chemo-theropy and all that stuff . I'm praying for a remission. The bad thing is that I've got a lot of it in my lungs. The chemo might not work. Who knows? I keep asking mysell why. This is supposed to be my year. Senior. Basketball. Talent scouts. My 18th birthday is in a month. Now, assuming I don't die before then, the chemo will make me so sick I won't be able to go to school. There goes basketball.

Senior Prom. My whole class is going to graduate without me. Gayle is not going to be happy about this. What girl would? I haven'ttold heranything yet. God! Whythe hdll did lever start smoking? To impress a couple of idiotic 'l 2 yr. old boys. Everything I have hoped for and dreamed about my entire life has gone up in a puff ol smoke. I guess thats pretty ironic.

Decisions There lam trying to hold back lrom a llimsy hope of an unreachable purpose.

I don't know if I should keep going, sometimes I don't even know if l'm trying.

But the fact is the fact, after all, here I am.

Suffering and smiling at life,

working like a madman, trying to show everyone how good I am, even though sometimes I don't even know who I am.

Hell or Heaven, triumph or defeat, fun and depression, to cry or to laugh, that's what life is, decisions.

Life seems like a castle ol playing cards one rnore decision could be a disaster or could be a step to raise up.

But, if it lalls down suddenly you start allover again and, there willbe one day in which you wont be able to do it again, and you'llbe. .

.

- Vincent Piedrahita

31

Jeremy hung up the phone with a sigh. His girllriend, Celeste, had just called to say that she couldn't keep their date that night. She had come down with strep throat, and hertemperature had risento 1 03degrees. Trying not to sound disappointed, he told her that they could go out the next weekend. After hanging up the phone, he tried to think ol what he could do on Halloween night. He called Dennis to find out if he was still having a party. Dennis said yes, however, it was a costume party. Jeremy grabbed an old sheet out of the closet, cut two holes in it, and was on his way.

At the party, Jeremy drank loo much, as usual. He also refused an offerfor a ride home, claiming that he felt f ine. As he neared an intersection on the way home, he thought that it would be cute if he drove around in his ghost costume. Bleary eyed and giggling, he lumbled around, looking for the eye holes.

When Jeremy opened his eyes again, he found himself in a hospital room. He could vaguely make out his parents standing a lew feet away. He heart his mother sobbing. Then he asked them what had happened and why he was there.

They told him that he had run a red light at the corner of First and Main, hitting anothercarturning left. Jeremy

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asked about the people in the other car, but suddenly his molher began to cry hysterically. He asked his father what was wrong. His father said that Celeste and her motherwere inthe carthat he hit. Theywere ontheirway to the hospital because Celeste's temperature was close to 106degrees. Then his dad told him that Celeste's

mother was pronounced dead at the scene, while Celeste survived with a crushed face and broken ribs.

Jeremy's eyesflooded with tears. AIter he calmed down, he lurned to his father.

"1...1 need help. I have a drinking problem."

For the first time in his entire life, Jeremy saw his father cry as he answered, "Son, you've just made the hardest step to recovery, the first step."

A year after his accident, Jeremy had fully recovered from his alcoholism. He traveled all overthe country speaking to students in junior and senior high schools about his experience. He told them that his life would never be the same after killing his girlfriend's mother and ruining the life ol the girl he loved. He hoped through his

speeches that he could reach some students before it was too late. At the end of each speech, Jeremy always said, "Drinking destroys. . . so take the first step before the destruction strikes."

.-" *"*-

Illustration by Keith Hope

32

Photo by Mike Edwards

33

The Homeless and the Helpless Dedicated to abused dogs and Boo Boo

You see them skinny and starving ln the street, Their ribs stick out Robbed of meat Supposed to be man's best lriend But people put their lives to an end.

Locked in a cage awaiting their death.

Beaten and scared And has anyone wept Some are used in a lab to see how they react To cruel and inhumane experiments Then the bodies are sacked They're placed in a freezer Then taken away, They will never run And they will never play.

Think ol a little girl Playing catch with her dog.

She turns around and he is gone.

He is found a mere block away, And to the pound, he is sent to stay

ll he is not claimed He will end up dead And a word about him ls never said.

Or a Man has a dog That could be tame lnstead he teaches it to maul and maim He teachs it to light anolher until one loses.

And the loser does not go home to a hardy meal, He is buried and the man thinks it is no big deal.

ls man this sick to let poor creatures die, Can we let a beaten dog just lay and cry?

You know we could stop this cruelty, lf we just try.

I know the truth is harsh And these things are sad to hear, But il it were your dog, Would you shed a tear?

I

wish I could stop this crime of abuse,

And just let every fluffy puppy lree to run loose.

But not in our world that is so cruel, But in a place where only love rules. lf you could just see the pain ln those sad helpless eyes, Feelthem stuggle for life, Or hear them cry, You would want it to end So fight against this abuse and make it end.

So when you go to sleep tonight Show you really care, Allyou have to do is stop and say a prayer, And before you are through, don't lorget to bless, Those puppies that are homeless, And those that are helpless.

- Heidi Robbins

Photo by

lulie

Riley

34

I Need Not Question My Feelings I need not question my feelings nor the fragrance of yesterday's desires.

The significance of memories only decorate the road to where I am going.

I open my hands as if to capture a portion of the cool, crisp morning air but return them into my pockets empty handed, yet more content than before.

My curiousity lies in the fact that I long to more than experience my being. lwant to leel it.

Although it is not a matter ol searching, it is a means of accepting and opening up a part of myself that I have protected for so long.

I cannot tell you in words what I long to express, but you'll see it and feel it in my actions and though at times there is fear and hesitancy.

You must know you have done nothing wrong, you have done so much right.

It's me, emerging from a cocoon, readying myself to spread my wings and fly.

It's me abandoning my protective shell and living life to its fullest, at my.own free will.

It's looking into the mirrOr lor the first time in years seeing your reflection and mine and being able to smile.

It's looking into your eyes opening up my heart holding your hand and just letting myself be.

I remove my hands from my pockets and touch the trunk of an ancient tree so strong, so thick, such deep roots and so many branches reaching upward towards the sky.

I look up there half expecting some sign or reason why, but I cant help but smile as the sun breaks through the clouds.

The reason lies within itself and so does its question.

- Jenny George

35

Open the door. . to the joy of FRIENDSHIP o

Photo by lason Cook

36

A Friend A f riend is something to cherish,

Forthey arelar andfew. l've searched so long and hard, to find a friend like you. ln you I see tomorrow, I know that you'llbe there.

To comfort and to guide me, To let me know you care.

Audrey Trowbridge

Photo bY Danielle Hedlund

I Need a Hug At the end ol a lengthy and tiring day, When l've faced the world in my own private way, I need a hug!

When I'm hungry and cranky and feeling uptight, And a day has just passed when little went right, I need a hug!

When my body is craving the warmth of another, And my poor aching muscles compete with each other, I need a hugl When I am affectionale, loving and caring, And want to enjoy a moment of sharing, I need a hug!

Shannon Cerre Photo by Danielle Hedlund

37

My sister Michelle is a striking beauty. Her bright blue eyes paired with herdark auburn hair in themselves defy the statistics of genetics. Her fair skin looks chinadoll-like in the winter, and her smile lights up her lace.

Michelle's outer beauty; however, in no way dims her inner beauty. ln describing her personality, the adjective laithfulcomesto mind -faithtulas a sisler and as afriend.

Ever since I can remember, my sister has been my laithfulfriend. Sure, we had ourlights and raced lo Mom totellourside olthe storylirst, but Michelle always let me tag along with her. I was invited to her "big girl" slumber parties, and "helped" her on many a babysitting job.

Whenever I tagged along to lhe mall, she always spent some of her babysitting money to buy me my favorite - a lime "slushie." I remember crawling into her bed wheneverlhere was athunderstorm and, instead of protesting, she told me lhat if I thought about good things I wouldn't be scared anymore; we talked about our lavorite things untilwe fell asleep.

As we both grew up, my fears became bigger and more real, but Michelle was stillthere to help me overcome them and put them behind me. The thing I am most

gratefullor, isthat she neverlaughed at me;maybe itwas because she had been through many of the same problems herself once. She always helped me come lo the right decision and I always felt so much better aftertalking to her. There's nothing like agood crywith yourbig sister.

I did not know it then, but lwas so very lucky to have a big sister who set a good example lor me to lollow.

Faithfully, my sister still sets a good example for me.

My once little sister admiration for Michelle has turned into pride and joy. I am so proudof her. Her musical and vocal achievements continue to astound me. When others speak of her and what she means to them, I feel I will burstwith pride in being hersister. About a yearago, we had the same hairstyle and, according to most people, looked alot alike. When lvisited her at college, there was always someone who came up to me and said, "You must be Michelle's sister - you look so much alike!" lwould smile, giggle perhaps, and proudly replythat yes, lwas her sister.

When I think about it, not a lot has changed between us. I still tag along, but now it is to f rat parties; and I still take my problems to Michelle, and she stilldoesn't laugh at me. Most importantly, I think, Michelle made sure I didn't turn into a little sisterwho tried to be her big sister - although it would have been quite easy. I feelshe is responsible for helping me to find my separate identity, and to be comfortable in it. She encourages my academic

achievements and always lets me know how proud she is of me. She also strengthened myfaith in God;6he herself being an example of faith. I am gratefulto my sister and proud ol her. I will never be to her anything less lhan she has been to me, faithful.

Nameless lwalk alone on the streets of silence I can't lind my home.

A silent word empty of love no sign from above.

How did I get here... that I don't know I walk the streets hearing the wind blow.

There is no one here to whom I can talk Where is my home...

I start to walk.

walk through the fog I'm surrounded by gray no light in this world from the path I might stray.

I

I need someone to guide me no matter what the cost I need someone to help me because, I'm alraid l'm lost.

Stephanie Fuqua

38

Remembering that whirlwind weekend still brings tears to Kris'eyes. Yes, the pain has eased, but it is still

a

to strike at vulnerable moment.Kris, going through an old yearbook, realizes almost lour years have passed since that tragic time.

Four years, four years...

Tammy and Kris had been best friends ever since that first week of lourth grade. Kris had just moved and was playing on the jungle gym with Carrie, a tall lanky girl, when Joey approached. "Kris," Joey began, '\uhere did you move from?"

"A little town called Albert; il's about twelve miles from there, waiting, ready

here."

"Never heard of

it. Anyway, do you know Tammy?"

Joey pointed to a small, skinny, brown haired girlwith glasses. She had pale skin and was sitting on top of the monkey bars pretending notto notice buttruthfullywatching intently.

"Yes ," Kris answered, "l know her. She's in Mrs. Keegan's class, right?"

'Yeah, she wants to know il you want to be friends."

"Sure," Kris replied.

Joey called Tammy over to the jungle gym and proceeded

to introduce the two. Kris and Tammy shyly

looked at each otherand mumbled hellos. Thelollowing Friday Tammy had Kris stay the night. Many more sleepovers followed, and soon Kris and Tammy became inseperable best lriends.

Tammy and Kris went through all the things best lriends do. They went shopping, tried on makeup, and shared dreams together. Why, theywere even together when they recieved presents f.rom their first bolriends.

Tammy and Kris were in the library at schoolwith Mike

and Jeff. The two girls left for a moment to go to the restroom. ln reality,lhey justwanted afew minutes alone so they could talk about the guys. When they retured, theyfound Mike andJeff with huge, Cheshirecatgrinson their laces.

"What's up?" Kris asked suspiciously.

"Look in your history books," Jeff returned, smiling even more widely.

Between the pages of their books they found what they thought were the most gorgeous presents they had ever seen. Tammy had a pair of birthstone earrings and Kris had a gold chain. The girls shyly mumbled their thanks. Relieving them allfrom their increasing emba-. rassment, the bell rang. Kris and Tammy ran out of the school exploding with laughter, partly lrom giddiness, and partly lrom being relieved ol the tension in the library.

They admired each other's gift's.

Then Tammy said, "Oh no! What if my mom sees these? She'llfreak!"

'Tammy don't worry about it. Just put them in your jewelry box and when you want to wear them, put them on after you leave for school."

"But what if Cherie sees them? She'lltease me and tell mom. Mom thinks I'm too young to get stulf from guys." "l know," Kris replied, "my mom thinks I'm too young too. I've got it. Just tell her they're lrom me."

"Okay," Tammy linally agreed.

The girls began the walk home from school, parting only when they reached Tammy's house.

Finally, with much anticipation, jr. high came. They had made a pact to stay best lriends and to get as popular as possible bycheerleadertryouttime. The girls figured il they could get realpopular, theycould make cheerleading easily. They often told each other they didn't have to worry about the lreshman picking on them because Kim and Cherie wouldn't let them. Kim and Cherie were best friends, as well as Kris and Tammy's sisters. They had time and time assured Tammy and Kris that if they did everything Kim and Cherie told them to, nothing would happen to them.

The first lew monlhs came and went quickly and Kris felt they bolh had friends and were indeed popular.

Tammy obviously didn't feelthe same because one day Kris got a note from her and it said, "Kris, I don't mean to be bugging you, but could you please get me popular like you are? I want the girls to talk to me like they do to you. lf you can't though, I'll understand. Love ya, Tammy." At the bottom of the note was "VBFA", which stood for "very best friends always."

Kris, who had been in the girls'restroom with some friends, finished the note. Another girl asked to read it and Kris replied quietly , "No. Tammy wouldn't like it."

Kris looked up into the mirror. She saw her reflection, a fair skinned girlwith hazel eyes. And out of those hazel eyes a singlb tear lell. Kris quickly brushed it away and decided to tellTammy she didn't care about popularity anymore. All Kris wanted was lorthe two girls to remain best friends and for Tammy to leel she belonged. And that's the way it happened. But Tammy and Kris grew apart. They each found a group they felt comlortable in, but they found less and less time for each other. Kris missed Tammydesperately but nevertold herthat... she only hoped Tammy felt the same way. One Friday right before lunch as Kris was walking down seventh grade hall she spotted Tammy.

'Tammy," Kris whispered loudly, hoping none of

Seasons

in the Sunl cont'd.

the teachers would come and tell her to get to class, 'Vhere are you going?"

Tammy stopped to open her locker as Kris approached.

"Home. I don't feel good."

"Sick on your birthday? What a bummer. What's wrong?" "l'm not sure. I just feel like crap."

"Well," Kris said, "l'll bring your present over tomorrow. Hope you get to leeling better."

With a wane smile Tammy replied, 'Yeah, me too.

See ya."

The next day Kris called Tammyto tell hershe couldn't bring her present over until Sunday. Tammy's sister answered the phone. "ls Tammy there?"

"Yeah. But she is too sick to come to the phone."

"WellCherie, this is Kris. Would you tell herthat I said Happy Birthday and that I have her present for her?"

"Sure thing," Cherie said.

"Well, thanks. Bye." Kris replaced the reciever to its hook and looked at Tammy's present. They were earrings that resembled a star bouquet. The stars were pink, red, and purple. Kris knew Tammy would love them. She forgot about Tammy's illness. That is, until Monday morning came.

Kris was in the hallgossipping with Andrea, Candi, Julie, Kelly, and Erinwhen Tana approached. Tanawas a f at, red headed girlwho was somewhat of a bully. Tana was disliked to say the least. She came up to the group and said, "Who is Tammy Bishop's best friend?"

When all ol the girls pointed to Kris she looked shocked.

"What?" Kris cried indigantly. "What did you say?" "l said ," Tana repeated calmly, her patience wearing thin, " Who is Tammy's best friend?"

"Oh," Kris said, relief f looding her face, "l thought you said who hates Tammy. I'm her best friend. Why?" Tana said, "Come here," and led Kris a few feet away from the group. Tana began quietly. "Kris, Tammy died this morning sitting up in a chair."

There was a long pause as a look of disbelief crossed

Kris'face. "l don't think that this joke is lunny-not one bit."

Tana quitely but determinedly said, "Kris, l"m serious.

She's dead."

Kris looked bewilderedly down the hall, praying for a glance ol Tammy's smallbody soshe could provethatfat cow Tana wrong. But all Kris saw was her sister, unsmiling, approaching her. Atthat moment Kris knew it was true.

"Kim," Kris began, her voice quavering, 'Tana said

Tammy's dead."

"lknow Kris, come on."

Kris left her friends, who were trying to get her to answer their numerous qhuestions. But Kris kept on walking, protected by her older sister's arm around her.

39

"Kim, l'm going to call mom to come and get me."

"Okay. I'm going to try and find out if it's true."

Kris hurriedly walked down the hallto the office. She calmly asked the secretary if she could use the phone.

After getting permission she dialed the phone.

"Mom," Kris began, her voice beginning to crack again, "cpme get me." Kris didn't ask please and there was no niceness in her voice. Just fear.

"Kris, what's wrong?"

"Mom, l'lltellyou when you get here. Just get here as fast as you can."

Kris hung up the phone and went outside to wait.

Within a few momenls her mother pulled up to the curb.

"Mom" was all Kris could get out belore she broke into heart-wrenching sobs.

"Kris, honey, calm down. You'll make yourself sick.

What's wrong?"

Finally, between sobs, Kris managed to get it out.

"Momma, they said, they said Tammy's dead." A f resh set of sobs overcame Kris.

"Krissy honey, shhh. Oh honey, l'm sorry."

Kris' mom sat and held Kris stroking her blond hair untilthe sobs subsided. "Honey," her mom began, "let's go by Tammy's house to check. You need to know for SUTE.,,

They rode in silence the two blocks to Tammy's house to check. Before they reached the yellow-stucco house, Kris saw the ambulance and the cop car. A lresh wave of sobs overcame Kris.

"Oh Krissy baby. I'm so sorry," Kris' mother soothed.

Kris just sat in her mothe/s arms isolated and so, so alone. Cherie approached the car.

"Cherie," Kris'mom began,'\ue're so sorry, Are you going to be alright?"

"Yeah," Cherie replied weakly. Cherie looked at Kris who was trying, but not succeeding in controlling her sobs. "Kris," Cherie asked tentatively, "are you going to be alright?"

Kris only managed a nod to show she would, but deep down she knew things would never be the same.

At the rosary Kris re-lived the past few days. Tammy hadn't died in a chair, she died sleeping on the coach.

Her lungs had lilled up with f luid. When Tammy's mother checked at one A.M., she was fine. When she checked on her at three A.M., she was gone. Kris'friend grasping her hand brought her back to reality. lt was time to go see

Tammy for the last time. Clinging to her mother, Kris walkedslowly to the casket, which held her best friend.

Kris looked in at Tammy.

"Momma, it's not her. lt doesn't look like her."

"Krissy, Tammy's not here. She's in heaven honey."

Kris' mother gently nudged her to move on. When Kris turned to face Tammy's parents and Cherie, the tears fell once again. This broughttearstoTammy's parents' eyes also. As Kris' mom said a lew words lo them, Kris lett lor the car, hugging a few friends along the way.

When Kris' rnom reached the car she said, "Baby,

40 Seasons

in the Sanl cont'd.

you only have to make it through torncrrow. I promise things will get better."

The next day at the funeral Kris remained fairly calm.

She often thought of the band that Tammy, Cherie, Kim, and Kris had often pretended to be in. She thought of the song "Seasons in the Sun" they had all lip-synced to. The song was about a boy who had died young but wanted no one to cryforhim. He justwanted everyoneto remember all the good times. But it was too painlul for Kris to do that

just yet.

At the cemetary Kris knew it was the end. Tammy wasn't coming back. ln her hand, Kris held two red carnations. As she passed the casket Kris said, ,,G'bye, Tammy. I'll miss and love you always. But don't worry, l'll be seeing you again."

And with that she placed one of the carnations on the grave and kept the olher one, cluthching it fiercely. Kris

My Friend Teddy Teddy, teddy, you're my best friend, You stick with me through thick and thin.

I cry to you allthe time, You always cornlort and dry my eyes.

You stay with me allthrough the night, You help me overcome my fright.

When l'm happy you share my joy, To me you're not just another toy.

You never judge what I do, You just listen as I pour out my heart to you.

You're everything a friend should be, No matter what, you're always there for me.

- Audrey Trowbridge

left, feeling as though a part of he r had died. And in thruth, a part had. But in the spot that had died, something was

born. A space in Kris' heart for Tammy Sue Bishop had been created. And no one could take it away- not ever.

A Friend For Always

My Grandma My grandma is a lady lwas lucky to know She taught me, she loved me, she helped me to grow.

Now I see her resting in the house of God, I kiss her cold face and give a loving nod.

I know she's in heaven living so happily, It's just not fair because lwant her here with me.

- Kimi Taylor When I have felt alone lcalled for you And you came willingly to my side.

You listened to me when lthought no one would care or understand how I felt.

Allthe times I messed up you forgave me, no questions asked.

Whenever I needed a friend you were there.

lf I had a problem lcouldn't handle I gave it to you and you solved it.

You loved me when no one else did and gave of yourself so that my life would be complete.

You made me who I am.

When darkness filled my tife you brought forth light and hope. lwait patiently lor the time when I can say 'thank you" to you lace to face, but untillhen, Lord, let me say now "l love you"

- Annisa Rhea

Your Eyes Your eyes are storytellers, Even words can't say it better. ln your eyes I see the pain, All the times that you've been blamed.

And I see how hard you've tried, Allthe nights that you have cried.

I can see the wars you've fought, Allthe lessons you've been taught.

Yes your eyes are strong and bold, Never warm, but always cold.

The bitterness you hold inside, ls rellected in your eyes.

Audrey Trowbridge

41

Photo by Danielle Hedlund

We walked in the door and all life seemed to end, standind there in the doorway looking at all of the faces full of sadness and regret. Little did these adolescent females know lor how long and how much they would re gret the next f ourto six hours of thei r lives. I just wanted

to take her, say no, and turn and run out the door.

However, she had made her decision and I shouldn't interfere.

We took our seats and she began to fill out the beginning of several forms. The feeling ol guilt grew inside me. The time had come forthe bloodtests and she was laken away.

I sat there looking around lhe room at all of the tearstained faces. There were lwenty-seven of them here, wasted lives, for various reasons such as carelessness and lack of responsibility.

Alter what seemed an eternity, her name was called and I liled in line behind her. We were directed through otherwaiting areas where the antiseptic smellwas more pungent than ever. Some of the girls began to weep again and I wished l'd never agreed to accompany my friend through her ordeal.

When they came the last time to take her away, a look of horror swept across her face. She looked at me as if the thing she loved most in lile was being stolen f rom her.

Tears formed in her eyes and slowly rolled down her face. I know how hard it was lor her to go through this crisis at her age.

Now, going back home with her, I could already feel the changes. ln some ways we were closer, yet I could stillleel us drifting apart. Looking back over the f ew years I'd known her, allchildhood and innocence seemed lost forever.

Silent Rage Strands of

confusion knot themselves within my heart.

My soul shadows over and my eyes are dull Too many tears, Too manybroken hearts, Too many shattered dreams.

AloneStranded in loneliness No one to help No one cares.

Screams of silent rage rip through the seams of my soul.

Open wounds never heal.

- Kim Moody

42

To Sheria

You and I used to be lriends we were together lor so long I can't help wonder what might have been please tell me what went wrong I see you alllhe time but you're turning your head I don't like this torture I'd rather be dead

The pain in my eyes I try to keep hidden for to look at my face to you, is lorbidden really do love you can't help that tried to lorget memories came back

The past creeping up to haunt my mind pictures of you the words, I can't find I want to say l'm sorry for whatever I did but I can't keep forever my face, lrom you, hid

The only reason it happened was because I care for you so I didn't know about this, the pain and the woe so please see it my way and look through my eyes

trust me this once past allthe lies Friends should stay together any battle can be won the two that are lost should be found, and form one I hope that this rhyme no matter the cost can bring you back now, lcan't stand being lost

-Randi

Jon Vattilana was atall awkward looking boy. Hewas thin with extra long lanky arms and boney legs. His hair was dark brown, possibly black, but looked lighter because it was cut almost to the skin. He had bright blue eyes and a nice smile which he didn't show much because ol his braces. One of the main drawbacks was his nose, big and kind of thin with a ball on the end. lt was a dilferent drawback. I guess it contrasted too much with his short hair and his slightly protruding ears.

I'll nevertorget the lirst day I saw him. His friend gave me a secret adrnirer note f rom him, and showed mewho

he

was. I thought he was kind of funny looking.

But,

within the next couple of days, he got my phone number and called me. We ended up talking several hours a day and became g reat f rie nds. Even though he looked f u nny, the more I gotto know him, the more it did not matter. He seemed to get nicer allthe time. He was always laughing and seemed to really enjoy life. lf you were down, he was alwaysthere to cheeryou up. Hewas a real life saver. I'm glad I got to know him as well as I did, so I could see the beautifulthings about him like his eyes, his smile, and his personality.

He absolutely loved fast cars. That's all he talked about besides his best friend Trent. He said they would think ol excuses just to go riding around together to talk or just to see how fast they could go. Jon would have been seventeen last Sunday, but he took one too many chances. He tried to pass a semi and was sucked up

underneath by the wind current. His car isn't so fast anymore. He always promised me he would wear his seat belt, but this time, it didn't matter. Maybe if Trent had been there he would have told Jon to slow down because he was too close; but who knows. Some people said it was suicide, but I f ind this impossible to believe because Jon was too much in love with lile for that. Jon Vattilana is one lriend I will never forget.

43

The Iceman Betrayal is a slap

Smirking

Stinging

Betrayal is giving your heart ln the form ol lriendship

Trusting

Waiting patiently

Counting your blessings And linding none Betrayal is being handed back a broken heart Crushed A heart no longer red, beating and living But pale and quiet A heart that is like a broken toy Played with too many times Used foolishly and then discarded

Hushed

Coldly

Boldly

By an lceman Tired of playing Fullol himself No room lor a heart of his own It would

lreeze

ln all of that ice

- Amy Cox

Her words are like salt on an open wound, Sting Slap Bum. The dagger digs deePer into my soul tearing it to shreds, Hurt Pain

Anguish.

The tears pour releasing the dam of emotions,

Anger Revenge Hate.

- Kim Mooily

44

Here in Wichita there is an underground group. They listen to the university radio program Atter Midnight.

They watch only the MTV programs on Sunday night that last from 9:30 pm through about 1:00 am. They shop at thrilt stores and flea markets, and buy and sell music at a small shop called Second Time Around. They hang out at small, mostly unknown clubs that usually close down alter awhile dueto lackof lunds orothervarious reasons.

They are the punks.

There are about one-hundred, and l'm one of them.

We all know each other, or at least mostly everybody.

We're a pretty close group, but we were especially close this last summer. Every nightwewenttothe river, bythe Douglas bridge. We had parties under the bridge that lasted from eight until eleven ortwelve. Sometimeswe'd just play in the fountains above the bridge. But one night changed all of our peacful, friendly, playful summer lun.

It was a Friday, so all the kids were out dragging Douglas. Seven of us decided we'd like to go experiment with some olher fountains down the street a bit. Off we ran in our already soaking clothes, ignoring the rude comments of the cruisers, and leaving shoes, bags, and jackets behindwith the rest. We had a greattime singing, laughing and spashing, and then decided it was time to head back to the group. We were crossing the street in f ront of Century ll when about six or seven black guys started lollowing us on their bicycles. They were yelling

at us and riding in circles around us. We told them to leave us alone. They refused. They kept circling us and taunting us until Jessica decided to yell at them. They told herto shut up. Sabina (she's one of the DJ's on Affer Midnight) had had it. She told them in a way that you witt be thankfulto me lor not quoting, to go on theirway and leave us alone. Just then this seven foot tall black boy smacked her across the side of the face. HARD. She wasn't going to take this. She grabbed one ol their bikes

that was laying on the ground, dragged it over to the fountain, and dumped it in. They hit her again. Then we started to walk back to the rest of the group. Quickly.

Before we had even gotten to the Century ll/river parking lot they had caught upwith us. Lisaturned and gave them

similar instructions to Sabina's. They hit her. Then we ran. We ran, with them right on our heels, screaming for help. Our lriends heard us, but thought we were just fooling around, untilwe got closer and they could see us.

All the mean looking guys from the group began walking, very quickly, towards us, and everyone else soon followed to see what was wrong and if help was needed. Believed at seeing this, we turned, only to discover that those big, tough boys that had been on our tails seconds before were now completely out of sight.

A lunatic attempt ol ourbig, mean looking guys to find this prime example of the deterioration of brain cells due to lack of stimulation ensued. After severalendeavors by the females of the group to stop this unreasonable, CroMagnon type search, we linally convinced them that we should tellthe police instead. We did. Allof us.

So, on that Friday night in July, sixty punks stood on Douglas. lthink the cruisers thought it was a freak show.

But, that is not the end. I then went back to the fountainto f ind that my purse, which l'd so cleverly hidden under my jacket, was missing. I never found it.

Now, I will give the details of the high point of the evening. As we, the freak show, were standing on Douglas talking to the officers, someone started yelling rude comments to Monica. She yelled back, just as allof us had done to our respective Douglas idiots. Most of us had gone back at that time, as I had. Moments later someone ran back yelling that someone in a truck was causing trouble with Monica and some others and for us to come back. ldidn't go back, because lwas searching all the nearby barrels and bushes for my purse. Before they had gotten back to Douglas, Monica and the others started heading back, the trouble presumably over. Then I heard screams.

I turned around to see that a big (excuse my language) hick truck and two other cars had pulled into the parking lot. Then I looked in the direction of the grassy area wherewe had been. Myfriend Jerrywaswalking toward

me, blood running like tears from one of his eyes. I immediately ran to him and hugged him. I held him forthe rest of the night.

Becki, Marnie, Valerie, and I took Jerry to the river's men's restroom to take care of his wound. Valerie had a pair of boxer shorts on over or under something else she

was wearing. I can't remember which. She removed them and letJerry usethemto'stopthe blood. Luckily, his glasses hadn't been broken, butthe rim evidentlywaslhe cause of the cut. lf it wern't lor his glasses, he would be in pain, but he wouldn't have been bleeding, and he wouldn't have the scarthat he does to remind him of that night lor the rest of his life.

He was crying hysterically. He didn't know what they did to make them hit him. He knew, but he just didn't realize it at the time because he was so ovenruhelmingly frightened. They thought he was a homosexual.

I stayed with Jerry into the bathroom until he had calmed down a bit. Then we wenl outside to see what was happening. lt was total chaos. The hicks were riding in their car yelling and waving their arms above them in triumph. People were running around scared, crying, wondering what to do. That's all I remember of that

45

Bitter

M emoriesl cont' d.

scene. I couldn't tell what people were saying; it

all

blurred together. I just kept watching those people in the car, so happy about what they were doing to us.

Someone yelled for us to leave. We alljumped into our cars. Monica has an old junker car that she sprayed graffitti on. The hicks decided that that was the car most symbolic of us. They jumped all over it, running overthe roof and hood and laying on the windshield while she was trying to drive away. Jerry and I ran to Marnie's car still

clinging to each other Then the police showed up. They arrested some of the hicks. They tried to arrest two of the people from our group but never cuffed them. I walked around the area with Jerry because he wanted to tellthe police what had happened. As we walked by a car, I noticed for the f irst time, who the people were. There were three girls and a boy. The girls were Linda and Tracy Rogers and Cindy Parker, allol whom I had gone to schoolwith and even been friends with at one point. The boy I didn't know, but as we walked by he started yelling at me. He said, pointing at Jerry,"Tell him he's a faggot! He's a bleep-ing

faggot and the next time I see him l'm gonna kick his bleep!'

At that exact moment I burst into tears. I couldn't believe these closed-minded, bigoted, stupid people.

Jerry was not what they called him, but even if he was, why should these people waste their time and energy making an innocent person's lile miserable?

I laterlound out that the hicks had various drugs and a gun in their car. A GUN!! They could have killed us!

They might have il the cops hadn't come when they did because they were obviously high! They also threw broken bottles at Darren, my boyfriend at the time, and told him what disgusting things they would do to him if he

didn't grow some hair. (Darren, at the time, was a skinhead.) At one point they had also brought out a tire iron and waved it at some of us.

Jerry's parents would not allow him to press charges.

We didn't go back to the river.

The police said we brought it on ourselves by the way we dressed. The police also said that we were a threat to

society.

Photo by Danielle Hedlund

46

47

Open the door. . . to the fancy of HUMOR

Photo by Jason Cook

48

DESCRIPTION:

A one-act, one-scene comedy requiring little-to-no stage and only two charaders.

CHARACTERS: Mr.

HarriS-e

defense attorny; rumbled suit, hunched shoulders

Rev. Sweeny-

A cheertuL pious minister

SETTING: A meeting room in a correctional institution. One smalltable

sits center stage flanked by two 'ltitindows" chairs. "Sunlight" filters in through apair of set in a tri-part back drop. REV is sitting in the stage-left chair tvviddling his thumbs.

HAR: REV:

(Enters downstage-right) Goodmorning, Reverend.

(Btses) May I help you, my son?

HAR: I believe it's more a matter ol what I can do for you, sir. (Crosses to table as he speaks) You see, I've been appointed as your counsel lor your upcoming competency hearing.

REV: (Laughs gentlll l'm blessed. Please... (Gestures to opposite chail ...sil.

(Both men sitl Now then... how can I be of aid to you?

HAR: (Stirs uncomfortablfi Well, if you could just explain to me how you came to be here?

The record is a little vague...

REV: Certainly my son. I was cleaning up after services one Sunday when one of the sisters suffered a hallucination and hit me over the head.

HAR: (Checking notes) Yes... she'd taken some bad LSD and thought you were her landlord.

REV: (Chuckles) These things happen... anyways, when lopened my eyes, lfound that lwas kneeling before Saint Peter.

HAR: (lnterruptsl Satt Peter?

REV: Saint Peter. lwas overjoyed, naturally.

HAR: Naturally.

REV: And then he spoketh unto us, and he said 'Ye must answer this question

honestly to get into Heaven.'

Because I was first in line, he approached me first.

HAR: And he said?

REV: And he said... 'How many times on Earth were you '\uith a woman"?'

HAR: And you said?

REV: Why, naturally, I cried out 'Never once, O blessed one!'

HAR: (Drily) Naturally. And then?

REV: And then he asked the next man the same question, and he replied, 'Only once, on my honeymoon.'

And the third man, when asked the same question replied, 'More times than I can remember.'

Saint Peter then said: 'By your answers, you have determined how ye shall get around Heaven for evermore.'

Then he handed me the keys to a Mercedes-Benz 380SL convertible. To the second man, he gave the keys to Honda Sco.oter, and to the third man he gave the lock and chain for a bicycle.

HAR: (lnterruptingl What kind ol bicycle?

REV: I can't recall... anyu/ays, we then entered the Kingdom and spent much time in adoration and holy services there. But then one day, while returning from a matinee at the Apostle Playhouse, I saw a sight which caused me to careen off the road, crash into a bridge support, and black out. I woke up back here.

HAR: Er, what was it you saw... exactly?

REV: (After a pause) Pope John Paul the Second on roller skates.

HAR: (Groans) Did you relate your... experience... to anyone?

REV: Why, yes! I told everyone at the hospital all about it! (Long pause) So tell me, what do you think our chances are?

HAR: To be honest, Reverend, we haven't got a prayer.

(Down curtain; cut lights)

49

"That is it!!" I yelled, "l'm not staying in this room with him another minute!" I glared at lhe source of my anger, Wesley, and stomped out ol the room. How could a teacher allow a student to act so obnoxious and test the sanity of the entire claso, herself included? The lact that this was herfirst full year ol teaching was no excuse; I'm

sure that in her student-teaching she was warned ol possible Wesleys. Besides, surely she was as sick ol this sarcastic, smirking twit as I was, and she had the power to do something about it.

Wesley pranced around the room with his glasses dangling on one ear, singing the "Gilligan's lsland" theme song. Wesley was like a fly, as soon as you had him cornered and were ready to smack him, he flew olf . That was what made him so irritating. He was uncatchable and unstoppable. He knew hewas irritating, and he loved it. He seemed to have some kind of daily quota ol how many times he could make me shriek, "Wesley! Stop it!"

Unfortunately, his quota seemed

to increase daily.

I

know what you're thinking... I shouldn't have let Wesley knowthat he irritated me andthat hewould have stopped; that he was just doing it lor the attention. I tried that, honestly I did. I don't know why it didn't work. lt was probably because he got enough attention as it was from the rest of the class. Well, I had tolerated all I could take.

I had reached the edge, and Wesley had pushed me over. My only regret was that I hadn't been able to pull Wesley over with me.

I was now in the principal's oflice, trying to think of what I would say when Mr. Flaymond asked me why I yelled at my teacher and walked out ol my class. lt was all so reasonable at the time. lt was unavoidable... I had to get out of there, or I would have hurt someone, preferably Wesley. I hadn't actually hit Wesley, what I had done was to make a statement. Maybe now my teacher would realize the madness she had driven her sludents to by not silencing Wesley. lf she felt the least bit sorry or guilty, it would be worth it. I could live with my punishment now. I was ready to take it. I felt kind of like a hero.

Now all I have to do is go through with it. I glanced over at Wesley to motivate my exasperation. He had erased the assignment andwas drawing the diagram of atwinkie on the chalkboard. He saw me and stuck out his tongue, then he quickly whined, "Miss Smith, Lori stuck her tongue out at me!" That did it. I stood up, flung a dirty look in Wesley's direction, and yelled,'That is it!" . . .

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51

Have you ever heard or seen a commercial that really made you wantthat item? Well, Alice Brubakerdid.

She heard a commercial on the radio that advertised a newpopcalled Grif. I guess itwasthetune or maybethe words lhat set off an alarm in her head that made her decide to try it out. Anyway, whatever it was, she went

"My...my...my mouth....is so.....dry." The words slipped from his lips as he lellto the floor, dead.

"John? John? Oh, my God, Johnl!"

Bob picked up John's lifeless body and carried him to lhe hospltal. After the doctors had completed their tests, they reported that John's insides had turned to

straight to the grocery store and bought a case of the new Gril pop.

After purchasing the case, she impatiently opened a can of Gritand chugged it down. lt was so good that she hurried home to let her husband in on the experience.

Running allthe way home, she dashed through the front door. She went over to the cabinet and poured a large glass fulllor Bob. "l brought you a cold drink," she said as she carried it into the living room where Bob was watching a football game.

Bob reached out and took the glass.

"Thank you," he said, stillwatching the game. "ll's a new pop," she said with a gleam in her eyes.

"Oh, really?"

He put the glass to his lips and took a big swallow. lnstantly he spit it back out.

"What is this mess called? Dirt?"

"No, Gr$" she answered harshly.

"Well, get it away lrom me. What are you trying to do, kill me?" "lf you don't like it, then l'll drink it!"

Alice took the glass and stomped into the bathroom, yelling "l'm going to take my three o'clock bath and enjoy my drinkl" "Three o'clock bath? lt's a wonder you haven't turned into a fish," Bob said sarcastically.

A few weeks went by before Bob noticed that Alice was constanlly drinking Grit. He started lo get worried.

He begged Alice to stop until he had checked it out. A f riend ol hisworked in a laboratory, so he decided lo have

complete dust.

"Oh no. Alice! Alice drinks that death potion," Bob ran to the phone and dialed frantically. "Hello, Alice?

Please don't drink anymore Grif. John just died from

drinking it."

"Bob, will you just stop with this nonsense! I'm going to take my three o'clock bath and enjoy a nice cold glass of Gn?, so don't bother me!"

"Alice? Alice! Don't hang up! Don't han9....."

Bob dropped the phone and [eft to go get Alice.

When he reached home and entered the house, he called

Alice's name. No one answered. He searched the kitchen, the living room, and the bedrooms. Nobody answered. Finally, he went into the bathroom. There he saw his young son standing beside the tub with the stopper still in hand.

"Look Dad. I let all the dirty water out."

the new pop tested. Grabbing a couple of cases, he drove to lhe lab.

"John, am I glad to see you. I need a favor."

"What is it, Bob?" "l want you to test this pop to see if it has anything in it that could cause side effects."

"GriQ Whydo you want metotest GriQ ll'safantastic pop," John said with a gleam in his eyes.

"Fantastic? lt tastes so bad that it's bound lo have some kind of side effect."

"Ridiculousl Let me have it." John grabbed the can and drank it. "You see? Nothing happened."

Then, all of a sudden, John grabbed his throat and started choking.

Photo by Kacey Kirk

There's a certain amount of respect due to any master of a craft, Angela thought as she rolled the nylon swath into a ball. At least they haven't made it too easy.

She grinned merrily. A lew well-placed lasers had deactivatedlhe roof's electric-eye grid, making her landing mere child's play.

Moving with the stealth born ol untold hours of praclice, she eased her slim ligure overthe edge ol the crumbling battlements. A quick visual check assured her that none of the guards had spotted her. Pleased, she scuttled spider-like across the tower's outside wall until she lound the window she sought.

As she had been led to expect, the window lrame sported a number of small lens-like fixtures. One didn't need a PhD to know that touching a window meant losing

a hand to the laser.

She grinned and renrcved a similar device from a thigh pouch. lnstead of deactivating the window setup, she traced a line around the lrame as if she were using a cutting torch. There was a barely audible ctick as the servo relays, deprived of power, cut out;both lasers and pressure alarms died.instantly. With alllhe arrogance of pure certainty, she bucked the largest pane in with a booted heel and slipped into the deserted room.

The young thiel moved with a surprising amount of discrimination, passing up the lavish displays of regal jewe lry without a second glance. Her prey lay against the larwall amidst hundreds ot its fellows.

Holding back a breath, she activated the UV goggles and scanned the wallof colorful leatherlor... there! The marker dot.

She chuckled evilly and pulled the otherwise innocent-looking hardbacklrom its roost. The chuckling grew even more intense when she litted the coverto reveal a minature sale complete with a smalldigital access lock.

She let her fingers dance across the touch sensitive pad and nearly screamed in ecstasywhen a mechanical grinding noise spl'rt the silence.

She allowed herself a lurtive momenl ol pride, envisioning the splendor and wealth she was about to uncover, then threw back the lid.

The twelve ounces of plastic explosives left very little of her upper body save a small discoloration on the opposite wall.

A Ballad of Geometry Why do you walk so sad, O student of mine, Why do you walk so sad?

The burden is more than I have ever had.

O woe is me.

It is the Geometry.

The burden is more than I have ever had.

You have done well in math before, O student of mine, You have done well in math before.

It is the figures and proofs that I abhor, O woe is me.

It is the Geometry.

It is the figures and proofs that I abhor.

Think of math as a window to the world, O student of mine,

Think of math as a window to the world.

A rock through that window I would like to hurl, O woe is me.

It is the Geometry.

A rock through that window lwould like to hurl. ls it the homework that causes you woe, O student ol mine, ls it the homework that cuases you woe?

Of course not! I only have a hundred pages or so!

O woe is me. lt is the Geometry.

Of course not! I only have a hundred pages or so!

- Amy Cox

53

One of the things I remember most is the first time I smoked a cigarette. lwas eight years old. My father had always smoked, and lwas curious aboutwhat cigarettes did to someone. Did they make you tough? Did they make you invincible? Or did they lust make you cough?

I really was clueless, and I f igured since the people I knew who smoked were cool, smoking was my ticket to being cool too.

It was summertime and all my lriends had gone on their family vacations. My sister was spending the week at my grandpa's. I usually never had trouble entertaining myself, but that day lwas really bored. Our house was about five blocks away from lhe ever lamous Ben Franklin Store. As a child, that was the cool place to hang out.

My mother never really cared that I spent time down there. How much trouble could an eight year old cause?

Little did she know. Although I knew none of my lriends would be there, I ventured down to Ben Franklin's.

There was a little bar at the back of the store that served soft drinks and slushes. The store had put in live boothes, and ours was lhe one in the back. My entire pack ol friends only needed one booth. All of us were skinny little f arts, and it took ten of our skinny little behinds tofillthe booth; and thatwas comfortably. lwas the only one sitting in the booth that day, and boy!... did I feel lost and small. The counterof cigaretteswas right nextto our famous booth. I sat and stared at them. Then it hit me.

I wanted to be cool, so this was my chance. Many things went spinning through my mind. What kind shall I get?

Where am I going to smoke them (yes, I was going to smoke the whole pack.)? What color of lighter should I get? I had no money and wasn't even close to being legal age. I neverthought aboutthetrouble I could have gotten into.

After about 45 minutes, I decided I was going to take

the Marlboro brand. Ol course, I picked Reds, the

strongest ones. What a litle nerd. Next I picked out a red lighter. Red was my lavorite color and it matched the pack of cigarettes. Leave it to me, I think of the important things. There wasn't anyone in the back of the store, so it wasn't too hard to stealthem. Great, a kleptomaniac at age eight. I casuallywalked out the door and headed for the field behind our house. God, I was so pround of myself. I had on aTee-shirt, so lfigured l'd be exceptionally cool by rolling them up in my sleeve. A real rebel I was. I wanted to run to the field so badly, but that would not have been cool. About to explode with excitement, I strutted to the back of the field.

The plastic wrapping ref lected the sun. lt was magic.

I tore the lighter out of its package and carelully opened my f resh pack of smokes. I didn't want to ru in that magical package. I pulled a cigarette out of the pack and put it in the corner of my mouth. I put it in the corner because that's where the cool people put it. I took my lighter and lit my cigarette, my ticket to coolness. I inhaled with everything I had.

I swear to God my lungs caught fire. We're talking roaring flames. I sat and coughed for five minutes. I swear lthrewthat cigarette a mile. My lungs hurt like hell.

I honestlythought mychestwas goingto explode. I really hurt. I wondered il lwas going to be able lo crawl home.

After my head stopped spinning, I managed to cart my uncool little body home. I must have made some smoker

a very happy person. I lelt an almost full pack

of

cigarettes and a new lighter in the field.

Today I occasionally smoke at parties or share one with my father. I don't think I will ever be a pack-a-day type smoker. Not after setting my lungs on f ire in the field behind my house. The weirdest thing about it is that even today I smoke Marlboro Reds. The sad thing about it is that its not as cooltoday as it was when I was eight years old.

54

It was Thursday, August 2,1994. This is a fact, but a very unimportant one. Nobody cares now...it just doesn't

matter. Some people feelguilty about what happened, but none ol them are from Earth.

Anyhow, about noon, a giant spacecralt ripped into Earth's atmosphere.

lt roared downward like a giant

bumblebee. The giant bumblebee spouted f ire and black fumes and rellected the light of the sun from its huge, shiny, metallic body.

Most bumblebees were not huge, chrome plated, and airtight. No bumblebees everspoutedlire either. Maybe a bumblebee was a bad analogy, but even if itwas, itwas no worse than anything else on Earth. Nothing like this had ever happened before, but millions of people didn't cheer the ship on, because only one man saw it.

This man's name was Jake Fribbley. He lived on a Iarm in rural, western Kansas. His house was in front of a grove ol trees. The trees were in front of a wheat field.

On the edge of this wheat f ield was an airplane hangar.

As the spaceship roared from out of the sky, its pilot mistook the hangar for a landing pad and dropped the ship smoothly onto the struclure. The sheerweight of the

ship, towering nearly a mile into the sky drove the unfortunate hangar nearly eighty leet into the ground.

Luckily, the plane was not in the hangar. Jake was also not in the hangar. He was in the airplane which was a cropduster and had been in the air. Then, all of the sudden it wasn't in the air, but rather, was on the ground.

Its wings were broken.

The plane, along with over one hundred birds in the area, had been caught in the incredible downdraft caused by the ship. The wings of the birds were also broken.

The plane had protected Jake from impact, so he was shaken, but alive. However, Jake had more important things on his mind than whether or not he was alive.

He goggled at the spaceship. Neither the spaceship

nor Jake moved. After live minutes of not moving it

became apparent to the ship, or rather lo the contents of the ship, The Pluto People, that Jake was not going to come to them, so they decided to go to him.

One of lhe chrome lumps began to slowly crawl down the side of the ship. Jake goggted at the moving lump while he goggled at the ship. The eftort to goggte at more than one thing at the same time was too much and soon he only goggled at the elevator.

Belore I go any larther into this historical account, I

think perhaps I should explain why The Ptuto people came to Earth.

They did not come to invade or even to enslave. No, they came to Earth because Earth was the only other

planet known lo have life on it. For a million years they had waited for Earth to send people to them. Finally they gave up and went to Earth.

They built a sleek, incredibly last, chrome plated spaceship. lt was big, it was bad, it was the pride of pluto.

It hadthe SuperZap Drive Engineswhich could crossthe galaxy in a little less lhan a weekend. Physicists claimed that the output of the engines was insufficient to produce such speed. This constant bickering eventually ledto the physicists being exiled to an island where they still are today.

They named this super sleek spaceship the fastest name that they could come up with. They cailed it ,,The

Sloth". lt should be noted that in a ptace as big and diversified as the universe, homonyms do occur. On Earth, the sloth was a slow moving and slow thinking animal;on Pluto the sloth is the amount of time between a given number and infinity. According to mathematicians all numbers make up infinity, so the physicists say that there is no time gap between a given number and infinity...but according lo them, the Super Zap Drive Engines don't really work when it's obvious that they do, so who's to say.

Anyhow, they wanted to talk to an Earth person. So they sent The Sloth to pick an Earth person up, take him back to Pluto and talk to him. They were going to record everything that he said and make a copy for themselves and a copy lor him (so that he would have reference materialto write a book and become rich and famous) and send him home."Now everybody will be happy!" said

the leader of the Pluto People Research Squad. His name was Zippo the Lighter, son of Zippo the Heavier.

The elevator touched the ground and Jake Fribbley,s paralysis broke. He fled toward the only structure nearby that was stillstanding. ltwas an old outhouse that he kept tools in.

The elevator door opened and out stepped Zippo the Lighter. He saw that Jake was not in the plane anymore so he went over to the outhouse. He stood in front of the door lor a long time before he realized that it wasn't automatic. He gave it a shove and it opened. Zippo stepped through the doorway.

Jake Fribbley was standing in the dark with a shovet.

With a grunt Jake hit Zippo atop the head with the shovet.

At lirst Zippo was startled but then he realized that this must be what Earth People do when they meet one another. "How very unlike a Pluto Person ," Zippo mused to himself, "l would have been happy just to shake hands." Responding in kind, Zippo sent Jake flying

through the wooden walt of the building with a terrific roundhouse that left Jake unconscious on the ground.

G

alactic

N

eighborsl cont' d.

55

Zippo explained to Jake's unconscious body that he came in peace and was going to take Jake to Pluto for a few months. "Follow me please", he said to Jake and turned to go back to the ship. Seeing that Jake didn't follow, Zippo returned and picked Jake up, and carried him back to the spaceship.

With a roar, the ship blasted into space sending an absolutely massive jet ol flames back to Earth. From here the facts become hazy but apparently the take off procedure leveled about a quarter of Kansas leaving nothing but a flat, bumed wasteland in its wake.

"What was that?" asked a man in front of a control panelin a nuclear missile silo.

"A nuclear attack!" said his boss "Counter attack Russia!"

The result of these actions led to a full scale nuclear war resulting in the annihilation of every single living organism on the lace of the Earth. Only two men were left alive.

About the time that The Sloth was passing Neptune these last two humans were shooting at each other in a dispute overlhe ownership of a can of stew. As the ship entered Pluto's atmosphere the last man on Earth was dying after contracting botulism from the stew. As Jake

walked out of The Sloth and stepped onto the soil of

Pluto, the only other human in the universe died.

Because of a mistake made by the Pluton Government, lifeon Earthwasgone. The Pluto Peoplewere nottofind out about this for quite some time.

Eventually Jake Fribbley came to understand that the Pluto People just wanted to talk to him and he was willing to do so. The only problem was not a problem of communication but rather a problem of time. A day on Pluto lasts just under one Earth year. Jake had to take so many naps that the Pluto People couldn't get aword in edgewise. lt didnt really matter about all of the naps though, because Jake Fribbley died of old age a little more lhan

two months later. The President ol Pluto, Zippo the Heavier (as opposed to his alorementioned son, Zippo the Lighter) wrote a formal apology to Earth and sent Jake's body home. lt was at this time that the Pluto People found out about the accidental destruction of Earth.

Needless to say, the Pluto People were depressed when they found out that not only was Earth destroyed, butalsothat itwastheirfault. They built a museumonthe moon. This museum is now called 'The Jake Fribbley lntergalactic Museum ol Life". Jake is a stufled exibit in the "A-Wing" of the first floor.

Each year, thousands of Pluto People come to pay homage to the world that they destroyed.

Can You Say Study? t took a test The other day I know lflunked it

What will mom say?

lwalked home With much renx)rse I dread the thought Of retaking the course.

lwalked into the house And much to my surprise There rnom stood With a gleam in her eyes. "l went to see your teacher," She said to me, "We discussed your grades, For first hour history."

"She gave me your test I think you should take a look."

And at that moment Mom looked like Captain Hook.

It was an A+ Can you believe it, my friend?

It looks like my lile Doesnt have to end.

- Kristey Comer

56

It all started one day when I got home from work. I almost thought my parents had brought me to the wrong house. Sitting in the driveway was a shiny, white '64 Mercury Comet.

My eyes lit up and a smile raced across my face. "Jim, is it mine?"

He nodded and said that I could drive it around the block, but that I could not take it anywhere until I got insurance and tags for it.

It was about a week before he had time to get the tags for the Comet, and I was irritated that I could not drive it.

I could hear it sitting alone onthe driveway saying, "Drive me, please, drive me!"

When I f inally got my chance to drive it, I went over to my best f riend's house to show it off . Taylor did not seem as thrilled about the rickety, old Comet as I was. But she said the car suited me. I am still not sure whether that statement should be taken as a compliment or an insult.

For two months after that, the Comet broke down, laithfully, once a week. I soon learned the f rustrating side of owning a car. Each week it needed some minor repair that Jim could do himself First, it was the thermostat.

Next, I hit a bump in the road and the fan started hitting the radiator. Then, the water pump went out, a soft plug blew out, a cylinder ring broke causing the Comet to leave a smoke screen everywhere it went. Then, a hose deteriorated. What was even worse about the Comet's

.

problems was that it never could break down when it was anywhere close to home. lt broke down twic3 at WSU and once on the way home from Hutchison, two miles lrom the nearest phone.

All this was compounded with the numerous things that were wrong with the Comet f rom the beginning. The shocks were all but nonexistent. The horn was broken and soon lell off. The radio, which was only an AM to begin with, did not even play a patheticcountry note now.

Only some of the brake lights came on. The tires were bald, and one exploded on Ridge Road in rush hour traf lic. The inlerior was so torn up that you cou ld see the f loor through the driver's seat.

After all of this, I often wonder why I love the Comet so much. But if you see what I am driving now, you willgain a much greater appreciation for the Comet.

Alterthe brakes went out in the Comet on the By-pass going 55mph and a close call coming up on a stoplight f ollowing a brand newVolvo, mygrandlathergave me an early Christmas present. lt isthe ugliest Plymoth Satellite the color of a grotesque bruise from only God knows what year. lt belongs parked on the side ol North Hillside rather than in lront of my house.

Currently, I am praying to win the Publishe/s Clearing House Sweepstakes so that I can take the lonely Comel to the auto shop and say, "Fix everything, and I want it back tonrorrow!"

Photo by Darlene Douthitt

57

Characters: Cinderella Snow White Peter Pan Humpty Dumpty Sleeping Beauty Special cameo appearances by: Rapunzel and Jiminy Cricket Scene One Curtain up. A bar in tairy-land. Severaldrunken dwarues, pigs and wolves, and royal soldiers make up the rowdy crown. They are a loud and disorderly lot, very comical. A talbe is set partially away from the others. Two women, one obviously pregnant, sit at this table. There are plenty of empty beer bottles scattered at their feet.

Snow White: You'd think she'd bother to come on time.

Cinderella: Relax Snow. She'llbe here. We just need to give her more time.

Snow White: She's probably in trouble, that little snit.

Cinderella: What a crab you are tonight. She's only an hour late. She has to be careful, you know.

(Snow Whtte is in a huff and turns away. Rapunzel approaches them.)

Rapunzel: You two want anything else?

Cinderella: No, thanks.

Snow White: Yes. Cinderella: No Snow White: (Distinctlyl Give me another beer!

(Rapunzel and Clnderella glance at each other. Cinderella shrugs.)

Rapunzel: How about tea, Cind? And that was a Bud, Snow? Right, I'll be back.

(Snow Whtte and Clnderella both nod,looking at each other. Rapunzel

leaves and returns to

the bar.)

Cinderella: Snow. . .

Snow Whlte: I know. I know. (She motions to her bulging belly.) I'm just edgy.

Cinderella: She needs us. That's why we're here. (Snow White nods slowly.)

Uh-oh.

Snow Whlte: What? What is it?

Cinderella:

Look what slithered in.

(Snow White turns around, gasps loudly, and ducks in her seat. Both Snow White and Clnderella try to look inconspicuous as Peter Pan surueys the room.)

Peter Pan: (Motioning to the barkeeper, Humpty Dumpty, andtaking him aside) I'm on a mission from lhe King. We're searching lor a woman.

Humpty Dumpty: Lots of women around here, Comrade. Just pick one.

Peter Pan: (Angrily) A specif ic woman. A woman the King wants badly.

King's Soldier #1: Hey!Twitter Toes! Go back to Neber-Neber land.

King's Soldier #2: Yeah!!You big toad!

(There is a generalwave of hisses and boos. More comments like "Fairy Traitor" and "Brainless Robot" fottow.)

HumptyDumpty: (Coyly,edgingaway) Likelsaid,ain'tnowomenaroundhere. Nottheoneyou'relooking for.

Peter Pan: (Yelling over the laughter.) Quiet! Shut up! (Waits for silence) The King is off ering a reward.

King's Soldier #1: Shove it up your . . .

King's Soldier #2: Beat it! Get lost mate!

Peter Pan: (lgnoring these comments.) One thousand gold pieces for information concerning the woman.

(Dead silence. Cinderella and Snow Whlte hold their breath.)

The Miilnight Regularsl cont'd.

58

Peter Pan: We will find her. With or without your help.

(Peter Pan exits, accompanied by shouts and rude gestures.

The uowd goes back to drinking.

The two women straighten themselves.)

Cinderella: Shucks, he lights dirty.

Snow White: This is getting serious, Cind. Maybe we shouldn't get involved. ldon't know about allthis. .

Cinderella: I'm staying. You can go il you like.

(Snow Whtte thinks it over in silence) Snow Whlte: I'll stay, but if we get caught. . .(her meaning is clealy Clnderella: Then we'llbe realcarelul like.

Scene Two The same bar, later that night. Most of the customers are gone. A few soldiers are spread out on the floor, snoring loudly. Humpty Dumpty and Rapunzel are at the bar wiping mugs and talking quietly to each other. Clnderella and Snow White are asleep in their chairs.

(A hooded figure enters.

Rapunzel goes to it. They converse briefly and then Rapunzel leads

the newcomer to the two women's table. Humpty Dumpty exits.)

Rapunzel: Snow. . .Cindie. . .She's here. Wake up now.

(They groggily shake their heads but then come fully awake.)

Clnderella: Beauty! You linally made it! (Rapunzel gets Sleeping Beauty a chair.) Where have you been?

Sleeping Beauty: ln the alley across the street.

Snow White: What??

Sleeping Beauty: The King had this place covered. I couldn't get in. Only just now when they were changing the watch was I able to slip inside. lt's getting worse out there. I have nowhere else to go (She begin to weep.)

Cinderella: (Glaring at Snow Whtte, but conforting Sleeplng Beauty) There, there. . .lt's alright now.

You're safe. We'll hide you and take care of things.

Snow Whlte: Speak for yourself, Cind.

Sleeping Beauty: (Raising her head from Cinderella's shoulder.) You mean you won't help me to escape?

Bapunzel: lgnoreher. She'sbeeninahorriblemoodallnight. (Io Cinderella) l'llgetafreshbatchof tea going. Humpty willwatch for soldiers.

Cinderella: Thanks. (TurningtoSnowWhite) Let'shearherout,okay? Thenwecan, makeupourminds.

(Snow Whlte sits down. After a moment so does Clnderella) Go ahead, Beauty.

Sleeplng Beauty: Al. . .alright. I guess I do owe you an explanation.

Snow White: lwouldthink so. Just leaving that mysterious notewas rathertasteless. (Cinde rella shushes her up)

Sleeping Beauty: lt was the only way I could get both of you lo come.

Cinderella: What kind ol trouble are you in?

Sleeping Beauty: I've lelt the Prince.

Snow White: What?!? You got me out here forthat?

(Sleeplng Beauty becomes flustered and there is an uncomfortable silence) Cinderella: I think you had better start at the beginning.

Snow Whlte: This is going to be realinteresting.

Cinderella: Shut up, Snow.

Sleeping Beauty: lthought lwas in love, really, I did. Y'know. . .him rescuing me and allthat.

But then

lound out he isn't that brave and smart and. . .

Snow White: Not that good in bed, huh?

Cinderella: (As Sleeping Beauty gasps.) Snow! Do you have to be so crude?

Snow White: C'mon! lf that's the problem, let's be honest about it.

Sleeping Beauty: Just because you have as many kids as Mother Hubbard doesn't mean you can . . .

I

The Midnight Regalarsl cont'd.

Clnderelta : (Hotding up her hands) Just catm down both of youl Go on, Beauty and you be quiet, Snow.

Snow Whlte: The point is. . .is that they didn't live happily ever after. Am I right? (steeplng Beauty nods. There is a noise off-stage and ail the girls iump. Enter Jlmlny Crlcket.)

Sleeplng Beauty: Jiminy! How did you get here?

Jlmlny Crlcket: Uptown bus, how else? I came as soon as lcould. (Hugs Sleeplng Beauty and greets the others.) Hello.

Snow Whlte: Anyone else coming to this secret rendezvous, Beauty? Or should we just invite the whole kingdom?

Clnderella: Don't mind her. She's such an ogre.

Jlmlny Crlcket: Especiatly at three in the morning. (Rapunzel reappears with a tray.l Rapunzel: Get it while it's hot, gang.

Scene Three Same bar, an hour later. The tour characters are tiredly leaning back in their chairs and rubbing their eyes.

Cinderella: So, that's why you left him. lt sure explains a lot of the politics that have been going on.

Jlmlny Cricket: lf that doesn't, then nothing will.

Rapunzel: I stilllind it hard to believe that the King would try to attack you. Underneath his son's nose even! That leech!

Sleeplng Beauty: That's what lthought. So, you see. . .allthese new taxes and laws were the King trying to force me to. . .to. . .

Snow Whlte: No need to say it. I can't believe the Prince doesn't believe you.

Steeptng Beauty: I don't think he can believe it about his father. lt would be tough on anyone.

Snow Whlte: Poor Beauty. . .willing to forgive anybody, even the Devil himself.

Sleeplng Beauty: Oh, him. He's just misguided. (The others look at each other and then start to laugh) What? Did I say something funny?

Clnderella: (Laughter dying) I think you should try and talk to your Prince again. Clear this up.

Steeplng Beauty: I can't. I'm afraid he'll never believe me. (Hesitatingl We had an awful fight.

Snow Whlte: (Still chucklingl At least the problem's not with his. . . (sleeptng Beauty makes as if to hit her, also laughing. The group doesn't notice the Prlnce entering.)

Prlnce: Sleeping Beauty. . .

(Laughter is abruptly cut short. Ail eyes turn to Sleeplng Beauty. Her back is to the Prlnce.)

Sleeplng Beauty: (To Rapunzell Tell methat'snothim.

Rapunzel: (Shaking her head) Sorry.

Prlnce: Beauty. . .look at me please.

(A group of soldiers file in behind the Prlnce. There is no escape.l Sleeping Beauty: Go away, m'lord.

Prince: (Confusedl l can't. You must come home.

(Sleeplng Beauty turns in her seat to face him.l Sleeplng Beauty: Really? Do l?

Clnderella: Don't be stubborn, you fool. This is your chance. Make peace now or you'll regret it. (pause) You two have something really special. Don't screw it up.

Snow Whlte: Go on, Beauty.

(Sleeplng Beauty stillhesitates. Finally, she stands.)

Sleeplng Beauty: lwasn't lying about. . .about what happened.

Prince: lknow.

Sleeplng Beauty: Dont patronize me!

Prlnce: (Stepping foruardl l'm not. I know now that you were telling me the truth. As much as I hate to

admit it, my father. . .

Sleeping Beauty: How did you. . .

Prlnce: A servant was wilness to. . .it. She linally came forward and told me what had happened. (Silence again- Then he continues brightlyl My father has left for his summer house. He says he will not return.

59

60

The Miilnight Regularsl cont'd.

Sleeping Beauty: Gone?

Prince: Yes, it's safe to come home now. (He touches her cheek. When she does not draw away, he pulls her into his arms) I'm so sorry, Beauty. I missed you so much.

(Sleeplng Beauty pulls away and glances at her friends. They are all smiling.)

Jiminy Cricket: Sounds like a great apology to me.

Snow White: Words of wisdom from a roach.

Sleeping Beauty: (Unsure of herself, but relieved) Maybe for a while. Not. . .permanently yet, you understand. But, yes, I'll come home lor a while.

(The soldiers cheer and the Prlnce hugs Sleeplng Beauty again.)

Prlnce: We'llwork it out, Beauty. I'll. . .try.

Sleeping Beauty: Me, too.

(The Prlnce and Sleeplng Beauty leave with their escott and so does Jlminy Cricket, after farewells trom the remaining girls.)

Rapunzel: Well, that turned out for the best.

Cinderella: Luckily.

Rapunzel: lt's time to close this place up, I guess. I'll see you tomorrow. Midnight?

Snow Whlte: CI course.

(Rapunzel exits. Clnderella and Snow White are left alone.)

Snow White: Another marriage saved. How does it leel?

Cinderella: Pretty good, actually. But I knew we could do it.

Snow White: Not a doubt in my mind.

Clnderella: Me neither. (They look at each other closely) Both: We got lucky. (They laugh and head for the exit) Snow Whlte: Of course, we knew there would be a happy ending. . .

Cinderella: This is a lairy tale, after all!

(Both exit. Curtain down.)

61

Open the door. .

.

to the discovery of LOVE

Photo by lason Cook

6?

63

My Knight My knight in shining armor It used to be you... are you still?

You could brighten my days or bring a smile into a desolate situation Finding you, I thought that chivalry wasn't dead... or is it?

You hurt me once, but lorgiving was easy, lwanted to Wounds heal, it just takes time yet just when my scar was healing, you reopened the wound.

My heart bleeds,

does it bleed lor me, or for you?

A Single Teardrop A single teardrop running down a cheek not a tear of sadness but one burning with relief lor a heart that has waited for so long lor a love to come that doesn't go wrong but now it's released because that love has been lound and it's just as beautiful as it sounds.

Shawn Taylor

l'm confused... my emotions are scrambled, lf only my head and heart could agree do I still love you?

Ithink I do... but will I get hurt again?

Last time you swore your love would be true, and that you would never hurt me...

I believed you, it was easy, lwanled to.

Do lwant to believe you again?

To take a chance? yes, lthink I do...

But don't hurt me again...

I'm not asking, I'm not telling... just don't.

My wounds only heal so many times, before long the pain in my heart may knock some sense into my head And that's when you, my knight, willget off your horse, and I may see you for what you really are.

But I'm still in love, and love is blind...

Please don't hurt me again...

For that could open my eyes, and with my eyes open, I'm not always so naive.

- Lara Lambert

My Life Slow downl

That's what they yell I'm trying to Can't you tell?

He sounds like a hood That's what my friends say Can't you trust me To know when a guy's O.K.?

I knew it was right When we first met I like him, already Or can't you tell yet? lwish people would stop Telling me what to do Hey, listen, this is my life Let me live it through!

- Crysania

*

Too Far She remembers first seeing him Sitting across the room Little did she know Friendship would bind two

The girlgave in For she loved him dear She wanted to be with him And hold him so near

The friendship grew deeper Between the girl and boy He said he liked her; The girlfelt immense joy

He left that morning Without saying goodbye She felt so hurt and used Allthey had, had been a lie

But it was not to be true For the boy had lied He really didn't like the girl And the short-lived romance died

They went too far On that cold night But it seemed so special It felt so right

About a month later The girlgot brave again She told the boy She needed a lriend

That week at school For the girl was hell Did that boy know her lf so, you couldn't tell

They started talking Friendship came again Foolish girl? Yes she was lor She didn't know it would once again end

Now the girl sits and looks At the boy across the room You can see the pain in her eyes The desperation, the gloom

For you see On one cold, cold night She invited him over He said, "alright"

She She She And

They pretended to feel no em(ltbn And acted as lriends But when he took her hand She knew a friendship would end

With much anticipation She watches the daft-haired boy Read the apologetic letter But on his face is no joy

The girl had never felt So comfortable, so right She reached for the lamp And turned out the light

So the girl sits and waits For her hope will not end She only wants this boy To be a specialfriend

They sat lor a moment And looked at one another, eye to eye When he said he wanted her She thought she would cry

knows she was wrong wants him for a friend writes a long letter gives it to a girlto send

. K.C.

65

Letting Go Letting go is so hard to do, Especially with someone like you.

We've been through so much together, Now I have to let go forever.

Itry so hard not to think about you As the days linger on, and I wonder what lies beyond.

This heart of mine's been shattered, And my mind's been battered.

I can't think straight anymore,

Cause all I see is you and me

Letting Go We've been together for so long, And it's hard lor me to see, I can't tell if I still love you, Or am afraid to be set free.

I know I really care lor you, But not if it is right.

Things just aren't the same now, We argue and we fight.

I think we're both afraid, We don't want to let go.

We think we will regret it, But deep inside we know, The feelings have departed us, They left us long ago. lf we could only realize it, We'd have a chance to grow.

- Anonymous

evermore. lf it's always this painful to let go, l'll never have anything to show.

- Audra Fankhauser

Photos by Auilrey Trowbridge

66

Tomorrowts Dawn My last tear has fallen to the ground.

It hits so softly without a sound.

What can I do? What can I say?

Now when I wake up it's just another day.

So many promises we made to each other.

She always knew that I loved another.

I guess I always have, and always will.

When she spoke, my heart grew still.

I guess she never really knew, My love for her was true.

I never tried to make her see and now we will never be Because now and forever she is gone. lwait silently lor tomorrow's dawn. .

- Botonis

Friends?

FOf gOtten

you, same, me, name. heartless, pain? you, stillremain. lfelt, cared. dared.

It seems I can't lorget lwish you lelt the You probably donl remember Or care to hear my How could you be so To leave me with this Everytime I think of I know the feelings You don't know how How much I really You never tried to feel the same, yOu never even And even though it's over, The pain goes on and on, No matter how much I wish lor You, The fact remains, you're gone.

- Anonymous

You know my pain grows stronger Each day that you're not here.

You know I feel such heartache, You know lfeelsuch fear.

I always wonder, late at night, What you felt for me.

I know you didn't love me, You wanted to be free.

All I wanted to hear you say, Was that you would be my friend, You would be that special person, On whom I could depend.

You say that this just happens, ln my heart I know it does.

You say that it is over, But for you---it never was.

- Anonymous

67

I

I

- ,/"/*

l\--/'

d

"I

l;, 1_

Romance Romanse, Romance, However it's spelled, ls sometimes between A boy and a girl, They say their I love you's Face to face, Say there's no other To take your place.

Then the day comes That they separate, And now her love has turned to hate.

He sends herflowers To let her know Just how much he loves her so, But she just smiles And leaves him dry Cause she's in love With some other guy.

So'romanse, romance There's never a doubt, One person in love ls how it turns out!

- Tina Burns

\MV

fuT

d/w' Illustration

by

Auilrey Trowbridge

69

Do You Want To Dance?

Just doing my hair on Saturday night I could already tell everything would be right

I slowly walk towards him heart beating fast He looks over to me like he has in the past

Tonight is the night

I finally get

it's my big chance

To say "hi" to that guy and ask him to dance I arrive at the dance I see him smile But I can't help thinking

allthe while What if he says no?

What do I do then?

Would I say "thanks anyway"?

and rejoin my friend?

the courage and without a glance lwalk up and say "Do you want to dance?"

He pauses for a moment 'Why not? Let's go!

"My heart is relieved and my eyes begin to glow

The song was so beautiful one l'll never forget This was really strange because we'd never met

Each Day Hold my hand, Walk with me, Each day.

Understand, Listen to me, Each day.

Be there,

Think of me, Each day.

Be my friend,

Love me, Each day.

- Tiffani Grimes I couldn't bear the thought

of him saying no but I must think postive and not let my fear shotv Oh no, a slow song my friend says 'go now" I had it all planned

But lforgot how

We became great friends then lell in love My vacation was great and he's all lthink of I can't believe it's true Maybe it was a joke Too soon for my broken-heart lfinally awoke

-

Angi Cook

Melting Love Just as snow starts out pure, grows larger as it falls from the sky, becomes polluted with particles in the air, and begins to melt until it reaches the warm earth as rain drops; so also love starts out innocent, grows stronger as time goes on, becomes polluted with arguments and fights, and begins to break down until it ends in sadness and tear drops; however, those who are lucky enough to have a love that never dies drift to a land where snow never melts.

Audrey Pitonak

w

Photo by Angela Davis

Forbidden Love Dreams Sometimes I find myself gazing deeply Too deeply lnto your eyes Afraid Yet curious, too Of what I might lind How do you feel?

Our lives are so different But our minds Are the same ls that just another Meaningless coincidence?

You were definitely not Love at first sight But feelings that grew Developed Evolved.

I've never met a guy Who just wanted To be friends But il that's alllhis is I'm grateful And il it's just a crazy dream May the alarm never go off And wake me.

Crysania

My Lost Love Having fun, screaming into the night, Getting wild and ctazy, it seemed so right.

Trying to be cool to all my friends They say they want to stay until the party ends.

The time passes along with beer glasses Everybody wasted everybody crashes.

I get into my car, trying to take her home.

The way lfeel is so easily shone.

Hitting 90 at the stop light It felt so good, it felt so right Wrapping the car around a tree I open my eyes and begin to see.

I fall to my knees and pray to the one above.

It's too late, she's dead, and now my lost love.

- Botonis

71

Nobody understands the love that we share.

It's something so strong, it will never disappear.

Even after you've gone and married someone else, And I have children of my own, The fobidden love we share and hide will be strong.

Maybe someday,

when others can accept, Without jealousy and anger the love that binds us together... as one... in anolher.

We willfinally be free to do as we want and need. you and me alone with nobody around to tell us right from wrong.

When what we have is so right, and what they think is so wrong.

I love you now and I always will, as you will me.

But the love we have must be strong.

We must be slrong, to keep this love alive forever.

For someday,

you and I will be together.

Whether it be in this life or the next.

You and ltogether me and you forever!

Kacey Kirk

72

Someone, Somewhere I hear the distant roar of the plane and the ringing ol the T.V. and know I'm missing something, somewhere.

I stay locked in my shell away from the world, and close the iron door to my spirit

and I know I'm missing

something, somewhere.

I look at my tears that lall so often and see the lonely depths of my soul

and I know I'm missing

someone, somewhere.

- Kim Mooily

Illustratlon by Llsa Allen

73

Taking a Chance My curious eyes search the room, They stop on him, a dream come true.

He's leaning up against the wall, The silent type, though big and strong.

Without a word his body speaks.

His glance tells me he's interested, His smile tells me he's sweet.

He's different than other guys around; He can be himself instead of one of a crowd.

He's just the one I've been looking for, So off I go across the floor.

To find true love or maybe heart-breaking pain.

I have to take a chance, Nothing ventured, nothing gained.

Audrey Trowbridge

I Wanted To Say lwanted to say you... But I was afraid.

I didn't think you would understand,

that I loved

so, I said nothing.

And remained in silence, Watching you, Loving you, Yet incapable of telling you what lfelt. lnside... in my heart.

lfinally wrote it down But now I'm afraid to give it to you.

- Scoam Keldy

The Oldest The oldest feelings of the day Burned in our hearts and made us sway.

It was inspoken, this pure love, That came from Heaven high above.

It gave us thoughts in which to think The softness felt in sable and in mink.

Freed from the darkness all around, Not set in soil, in freedom found.

No longer bound to this pained Earth: A new compassion was in its birth.

Desire to care was born within And need to love, its blessed twin.

We had no need for death or war For love and health was allwe bore.

- Quinn Oppenheimer

74

75

Open the door. .

.

to the mysterious UNKNOWN

Photo by lason Cook

76

77

A Friend For Always When I have felt alone I called for you And you came willingly to my side.

You listened to me when lthought no one would care or understand how I felt.

Allthe times I messed up you forgave me, no questions asked.

Whenever I needed a friend you were there. lf I had a problem lcouldn't handle gave I it to you and you solved it.

You loved me when no one else did and gave of yourself so that my lile would be complete.

You made me who I am.

When dad<ness filled my life you brought forth light and hope.

I wait patiently for the time when I can say 'lhank you" to you face to lace, but untilthen, Lord, let me say now "l love you" - Annisa Rhea

A Helping Hand Trapped inside a box, That's how lleel.

Nowhere to go, Nowhere real.

People who laugh, And don't even care.

I would love a tender hug, ls there one to sPare?

Itry to get out, Of this tinY box.

But I just triP and fall, Over bumPY old rocks.

Then down comes a hand, And helps me to mY feet.

It is God who Picks me uP, And tells me I'm not beat.

So I start over again, And l'm very glad to say, That I have a triend forever, Who will alwaYs show the waY.

-Michelle ReYnolds

Thanks All through mY addiction He was there for me Holding mY hand But ljust couldn't see.

He was there

When lwould cry Carrying me

When lwanted to die.

And yet His love for me

Neverwould end When I couldn't look at mysell in the mirror, And felt ashamed He told me'lwas beautiful, He was alwaYs mY friend.

Now I want to thank Him Looking from mY eYes I love you Jesus

Thank you for making me realize He has lorgiven me So can you i don't have to rePaY Him All I can saY is Thank You'

-Chris LaYton

78

To You Who

Know Me.

aa

To you who know me

Here lam Waiting foryou Just take my hand !'ll help you through life l'llshow you the way Just ask. . .

That's all l'llsay.

You know you are my chitdren Please let me take away The unnecessary burden Wake up today Praise my name For I am The truth and the way I am your life.

- Lori Lindsey

In God's Eyes Photo by Kacey Klrk You are beautituland forever free, But these are things not only I see.

For He is the reason we live each day, And in His eyes, He sees everyone this way.

- Anna Reida

God God is someone you never see, But he died on the cross for vou and lor me.

He watches us close, day by day, Just to be sure we don't go astray.

He loves us alllrom the bottom of his heart, ll we ask for forgiveness He'll allow a new start.

Kimi Taylor

Jesus He is the good Samaritan and he helps me on my way.

He is the comforter who helps me through the day.

He is the carpenter who lixes my life.

He is the carrier ol our burden and strire.

He is the listener when you cry.

He is the power that turns day to night.

He is Jesus and He died for you and me!

Yes it really happened the place was Calvary.

He is the atmighty One He came from Galilee.

- Chris Layton

79

He Lives He lives

though he died for our sins He lives through the power of all men He lives a new life will begin He lives no matter what your past might have been.

He hurts

night heart, to .oiin my sorrowed but I was deaf to your words' lwanted to reach out and touch you, but you were beyond my reach. lwanted to be able to see you, Lord, but my eyes were blind to your love.

I longed

lo hear your voice at

*htn

.,, He hurts

when we don't love one another He hurts when angry words are yelled at mother He hurts

when he knows you can, but you don't bother.

He toves

ll only I had known -,, rL^ time, You were beside me allthe whispering words in my

r:*^ ear. love, time'

lf only I had taken time to listen, to see, to maybe lwouldn't have wasted so much precious

All I can do now ls lorget the darkened roads behind

people hurt each other

no matter what wrong you have done He roves every person, excluding no one He loves you and me Until there is no son ,.,, He loves the son lives forever because he has won.

'

me

and look towards the tight ahead.

How vronderful it is To linally hear you, see

you, and love you, l-ord' - Annisa Rhea

Look for the Lord When the wind blows, I see the Lord.

When Winter turns to Spring and Summer turns to Fall, I see the Lord.

When I watch a graceful bird fly high above my head, I see the Lord.

When the waves hit the sand, I see the Lord.

Why? Because he is in everything we do.

He is here each day inside of me and you.

God has created a place for us to stay, So don't take it for granted and throw it away.

STOP! take a look around, and see what we have been given.

And remember it's a gift from the One in heaven.

- Kristen Emmel

Kacey Kirk

t'/

:t ,'Wil

\1.: 'iii

Illustration by Chuck

Ray

81

Mary White had always been alraid of the little storage

room that was underneath the stairs. This fear had originated in Mary's childhood when she had been accidentally locked in the room. An hour ol terror had passed before Mary was found huddled in a corner, tearfully clinging to a worn ragdoll. She had nightmares forweeks

after the incident. lt was always the same dream.

Something was chasing her and was getting closer and closer because she was unable to run. As a result, Mary developed a fear that was almost psychotic.

Now, at the age ol twenty-nine, Mary tried to conquer this "irrational" f ear by placing the f reezer next to the door that led to the room. So far, the fear remained.

But Mary was not thinking of the freezerthat beautiful autumn day. She thought only ol the party she was to attend later that evening. Gina had asked her to bring lasagna, lor the bulfet.

Mary opened the door of the basement to get meat from the lreezer. As the chill and darkness of the basement engulfed her, Mary felt the icy fear in the pit ol her stomach growing. Humming loudly. She descended the stairs rapidly, hitting the switch that released the wane, yellow light. She quickly strode across the damp, concrete floor.

As Mary hunted through the packages of meat, she heard a f aint noise coming lrom the direction of the room underneath the stairs.

She glanced over nervously, the learfast growing into

cold terror, threatening to engulf her. Mary watched in horror as the dood<nob slowly turned. The door creaked open. Mary was rooted to the ground, unable to tear her eyes away from the opening door.

Soon, Mary was able to make out the faint figure standing in the doorway. lt was about three leet tall.

Long, stringy orange hair covered its short, stocky body.

Beady red eyes peered from underneath the malted fur.

Mary could see small fangs protruding from what appeared to be a mouth.

The thing waddled fonrard, humming a familiar tune.

Mary recognized the song as the opening of Beethovens

Sth. ltslootstepswere loud. Thump. Thump. ltwasthe sound of a guillotine, the sound ol death.

Mary let out a blood-curdling scream and turned to run for the stainrvay, only to trip over a package of meat she had dropped. Sobbing, Mary crawled on her hands and knees. The whistling grew closer. Mary crawled faster and f aster, the rough boards ripping her hands and knees to shreds. The staircase seemed lo have grown longer.

Mary could see the light up ahead in the distance.

Afterwhat seemed like hours of lrantic climbing, Mary reached the doorway. Her hands and knees were horribly mangled. The flesh hung in tatters and blood oozed out, dripping on the clean kitchen floor.

She slammed the heavy basement door shut and leaned against the wall, breathing heavily. After a couple minutes had passed, Mary could hearthe thing'sthumps on the steps, growing closer. Mary grabbed the phone off the hook and dialed forthe police, herfingers shaking so much that she could hardly get the right numbers.

Mary heard the click ol the phone being picked up and began to speak, only to stop when she heard: "Hello, this is the police department, please hold."

The thumping grew louder and louder. The sound filled Mary's head so much she could hardly hearherown breathing. When she heard the doorknob squeak, Mary dropped the phone in a panic, and ran for the front door.

Screaming bloody murderwhile running into the front yard, Mary was amazed that no one came out to see where the screams came from. lt was almost as if time stood still.

Mary tried to run, but lound that her feet were like lead weights, heavy and cumbersome. lt was like running in slow motion. She could hear the thumping growing louder. Just as she was almost sure that the thing would grab her...

'Aaaaaaaaaaah," Mary screamed, sitting upright in bed, covered in a cold sweat. She put her hand over her

chest, feeling her racing heartbeat.

"Thank you, Lord, it was only a dream."

Mary crawled out of bed and walked downstairs. She went down into the basement to get some sausage for breakfast. Just as shewas opening the freezerdoor, she heard the creak of the doorknob behind her and cold, furry hands grabbed her and pulled her into the darkness.

B2

David Walker absentmindedly kicked a soda can along the street as he walked home from school. He just couldn't push it out of his mind, no matter how hard he tried. lt had started affecting his schoolwork and his

social life. His friends had been questioning him often about his behavior, but he just couldn't tell them. He couldn't tell anyone. lt was too weird, too unbelievable.

It was those dreams.

They had started about a month ago, and ever since they had plagued David's mind making it impossibte to think about anything else. He just couldn't understand it.

He had led what people could call a "normal" life up until now. He had never experienced anything like this before and he just couldn't f igure out what was happening to his mind. lt was lhose dreams.

He considered seeking professional help, but they would probably admit him to one of those labratories located way out in the middle of no man's land where they hook him up to numerous little electrodes and anlyze his

behavior. He wouldn't be able to stand such treatment, but then again it might be better than the uncertainty he was leeling, and had been feeling, lorwhat seemed like an eternity. lt was those dreams.

The dreams occured every night and left him feeling more exhausted than he had the night before. He had begun to dread sleep, to be terrified of it. But no mailer how hard he tried to avoid the ritual, he seemed drawn lo it, almost as if some unknown lorce wantedhim to sleep.

To dream thatdream.

Every night it came, and every night it was the same.

He heard the crying, the screaming. He saw the litile children scrambling aboul, clawing their way lo an exit that was never to be found. He saw the flames and felt them as they each took their deadly turn piercing his tender f lesh as he tried to get to the chitdren . He tried Every night he tried and every night he came just close enough to feelthe torn rags one of the children wore, but each night it was too late. lt was jusl too late. The hungry llames engulfed the children, changing lhem into some grotesque looking creatures not resembling humans at all. And itwasthen, admidstallthisturmoil,that he awoke every night shaking and sweating uncontrollably. David felt something had to be done, but what he had no idea.

However, that was not allthat stopped him from taking action. Something about the dreams intrigued him. An infinite number of questions boggled his mind. What started the fire? Where did it take place? Who were the children? And most important ol all-What did it all mean?

Suddenly David came out of his shell and noticed

that he was nowhere near his house or his neighborhood.

While he had been lighting with himself , trying to sort his thoughts, he hadbeenwalking. David had no ideawhere he was orwhere he was headed; he just let his feet guide

where he was or where he destination. He felt that unknown force again, only this time it was stronger, much

strongerthan everbefore. David felt lt pulsingwithin him, growing more powerful. He felt it gnawing at his insides until he no longer felt alive. lt was the dream.

David heard the crying, the screaming, he smelled the smoke and felt the heart of the intense f lames. Only now it was so much stronger. Almost real...

Right before his eyes was the burning inferno of his dreams. Only now he very much awake. The unknown force propelled him into the building. He heard the cries of achild. The soundscamefrom everywhere. Suddenly he saw himself reaching out seize hold of the little child's lorn clothes just like in the dream. But this was not a dream; this was real.

The feeling inside him exploded. David felt himsetf lunge forward, f elt his grip tighten around the child's arm,

and felt himself pulling the child away from danger to lreedom. Freedom!

Yes f reedom! At last! David was free! Free from that enormous eternalburden that had been placed upon his shoulders so anonymously. He had completed the task.

He was free to go.

83

run. I run as I have every nightforas long as my mind allows me to remember. I amchased. The samedemons follow my every move, as they do every night. Lost in a wilderness, trees are the danger now. The demons are behind me, but still there, following, waiting. My legs conlinue to pump.

A sharp left turn, another futile attempt to lose my pursuers. Avoid the dead limbs that reach out to hinder my journey. The ground is wetter as I go along. Rest, I must rest. A smallpause and lwillcontinue. Just need to catch my breath.

A welcome tree stump grants a unwelcome visitor a seat. Screams of demons that should've been lost long ago are louder. Twice louder. Threetimes as loud. I see the red llash of eyes in the brush no twenty meters from where I sit. A small laugh attracts my attention. lt is coming from the eyes.

Leaping forward, the two leet that support my weakened body spring into action. Awayward branch must by hurdled. The scenery is very familiar. I have been here before. Yes, this spot was traversed by me last night. I follow the same path, now having little control of my I

actions.

I glance to my rear. Purple, red, orange, black, brown,

every color imaginable is hot on my trail. I feel their breath. I move faster, but my body will not reply.

Quickly, I look behind again. Unfortunately, the trees which have reached for me now gel me. I am hit in the neck and lall. lt is all over. I prepare lor the end, but it does not come. Just as it didn't the many nights before, death does not show its evil hand.

Suddenly, I sense a familiar presence. lt is the leader of the pack. The creatures spread apart to give him room to pass. My body tightens. I have failed again. Leader willget my soullor himsell, my body for his hounds.

Leader is the largest of allthe monsters. He is yellow and black in color, his back the holder ol wings. He f lies around my exhausted self, examining his prey. lt is a nightly ritual.

A large, purple demon lets out his nightly howl. The horde lollows suit. Those who have no claws draw knives. White, glistening teeth are shown by all. My death has arrived.

Noise, screams actually fillthe dead forest. The trees appearto nod in appreciation. The entire countryside is against me. There is nowhere left to hide. The running is over. At last, I will be at peace.

The howls get louder. Leader prepares lo speak. The ground takes hold of me. The bushes rest on my hands

Photo by Angela Davis

and feet, one takes its place on my chest. My eyes close.

My eyes open. Some force wants me to see my f ate.

It is as before. No hope is left now. The howling is louder.

Leader is in front of me. His wings begin to flap. He

hovers above me. The final act begins.

As before, the howls stop. There is no noise. Leader props his head back. His mouth opens. Death is about to be unleashed.

A loud, long buzzing sound pierces my ears. My brain tries notto respond, but it is no use. I sense that my eyes are closed. I open them. lam in my bedroom, the same as always. The time is 6:30 a.m. I crawlout ol bed, time to go forth to a brand new day. Another new beginning for tomorrow.

84

ti

ln the beginning there was darkness, and then some me I ate r th e re w as m an. The n th e re we re me n, a nd th e n

there were too many men and so they built weapons... and there was war.

Years passed, weapons improved, and technology came to be and with it there came computers... war co m pute rs... artif ici al i nte I I ig e nce... gove rn i ng co mpute r brains... governing war intelligences... 2604 A.D. -and then there was G.O.D.D. Namon sat and looked at the holographic projection f or a while and conside red. Ho lograms were really somewhat outdated, lhe invention of the Mentat which could implant actual images into the mind of the user had made the old haloprojectors obsolete. Of course, in a short thirty years a single invention could only replace so much in a galaxy of some 1300 inhabited worlds. Formerly inhabited worlds, Namon bitterly corrected himsell.

1317 worlds dead lrom a single invention, the Governor mused, and the article made it sound like a deity.

Lesser computers suffered such calamities as Wwer su rges and blackouts, sho rt circuits and f ail ed desig n, but not G.O.D.D. (Governing Order of Destructive Distribution). G.O.D.D. was supreme; G.O.D.D. was immortal.

There was no disput that G.O.D.D. could not sotve.

There was no difference that G.O.D.D. could not correct.

The supreme mechanism of destruction had been . . The ideaot placing a machine inthe position of determining war and combat was nothing new. Man had been using machines to think for him for so long that the idea of unassisted warfare was not only unthinkable, it was beyond the realm of possibtity. The

achieved.

ideaof man determiningthe placeswhere military installations should be placed was impossible. There was no way that any humanbeing could determinethe variables and inferences, weighthe opposingfactors and rcme up with logical results fast enough to dealwith faster than ht we apo ns. Eve n o rg an ic/co mpute r tho u g ht i ile rtace could not function at an effective speed to callthe shots.

No, man had not directed or participated in ombat since the end of the twenty-third century, more than 200 years I ig

ago.

It occured to Narnon that a Mentat would be faster,

but he perfered to keep his brain free of uncensored memories. You never knew what an article might hold until it was already in your head. The trash on the haloscreen presently made Narnon glad he had made that decision.

The article went on to tel! about the manner in which the supercomputer had been constructed, the location and operation cost, usage fees, and then went into the history of its use.

As he scanned the "pages" through the long list of

information the diplomat mentally reveiwed what he already knew about the machine in question. G.O.D.D. was unique in that it was (and still is) the f irst computer of any kind to direct both sides of the warfare. The idea had been rejected for some forty years belore the two sides of a borderfeud between two f rontierworlds (the specif ic worlds were long since dead and forgotten) had decided to use the new consruction in hopes of saving time and improving the mutual harm inflicted. Namon stopped paging when the case that he remembered came up on the screen. ...the results were betterthan either of the pafticipants had believed was possible. Some ten years were spent in planning, construction, and distrubution (that is placement) of both sides'military installations. One minute and twenty seconds after the two diplomatic computers had presented G.O.D.D. with the required insructions, the war was over. On the victors side, three fourths of his army was destroyed, in addition to one third of his planet's occupiable land and twenty percent of his total population were dead. The loser sutfered even worse damage. His entire army was destroyed, two tifths of his land was laid waste and one fourth of his planets population exited from his worries. Such delightful devastation on planetwide scale had previously been believed impossible. After this revelation the need for whole federations to kill each other increased and the waiting line

for use ot G.O.D.D. became immense. After a few decades (the lag due to the time required to purchase or @nstruct weaponry and then placement of the instailation) the fantastic computer caught up on its backlog and planetwide wars could be fought without wait.

The list ol encounters continued lrom there and Namon soon lost direct interest. Planets and even whole systems happily blew each other to pieces over minor problems. The conditions and figures were slaggering.

Trillions ol people died with a lew decades.

Still in thought Narnon, noticed some of the major battles.

ln the older system of Plutarus (the ninth system discovered by Terran explorers) two mining companies fought a war over the mining rights of a smalt moon ob iti ng a g as g i ant (o ne of th e th ree pl anets in the syste m) in the year of 2678. The preparation time was cut short when one side conceded before the opening battle. The 'lictor" then immediately began installation of mining equipment. Three months after the concession the Hydrogen bomb that the withdrawn team had secretty placed detonated. The force of the blastwas sufficientto place the moon in a decaying orbit. The mining companies full installation was lost, costing some thirty billion credits and twenty million lives. ln 2682 a similar war

Lord of Alll cont'd.

85

took place with the tue victor of the Alpha Plutarus (or older Plutarus) War ( Delta Mining Company) and a new industrialfirm, Tri lndustries (31). The DeMCo/3l War was fought in the Omacron Mercurus system which consr'sts of three Planets orbiting a Red giant. The two innermost planets were gas giants; and the outer planet a glorified astroid. The war began at sl's request while

crumbled empire.

It had been 160 years since the original border war lirst demonstrating the potential of G.O.D.D. and humanities wars had reduced the entire human population

pl an ets we re at co nj u nctio n. T h e re aso n f o r th i s

get along and on April 12, 2804 A.D. the Governor ol OmegaTrion presentedthe declaration of warto Namon, Governor of Veturus Paradius, effective three months

the

th re e

action was descovered when the battle was ioined. The brunt of the preparation efforts of the 3l company was usedto construct a massive propulsion drive onthe small outer planet. The first action of the war was for DeMCo. to launch a massive assault on the third planet (the 3l base world in that system) the tighter drones arrived to f ind the planet in the wrong Wsition. To simplify the battle

the 3l homeworld accelerated to impact on the middle planet (which was the smaller of the two gas giants) with sufficient force to dislodge the immense planet from its orbit. The far larger inner planet then had sufficient gravity to draw the remains of the two collided planets ( about 73% ot the total original mass) into itself. The additional materialf rom the two smaller planets gave the giant enough mass to become a star. The resulting reaction caused by beginning stellar fusion destroyed both company devisions utterly. The total loss was some seven trillion credits and lives uncounted.

Namon retreated from the monitor in disgust, he had badly underestimated the destructive ability of the sister

planets to his own. He gave one linal glance at the screen, nolicing on it part of the final entry. ...the conflict ended when an extensive system of explosions was set of by an IPBM (lnterPlanetary Ballistic Missile) that struck with an impact great enough to imbalance the planetoids plutonium core. The resulting explosion...

The haloscreen faded with the llick ol a control switch, Namon stood and began to pace. He was not normally an excitable man, usually unmoved by the details of predicted doom or politicalthreats, but it seemed that the f inal end of the human race had come and its demise had predictably come lrom within. Perhaps it was justice that the planet he had been elected to rule was one of the last two to die.

Veturus Paradius was a beautiful planet about the size of the historical image of the mothenarorld (the legends referred to it as earth). Long isolated from the

other worlds ol the old empire, Namon's home was a peacelulworld (meaning that it was not totally dedicated to war). Namon had governed Veterna (as it was commonly called) lor seven years (elections being every seventh year) and had not experieinced any great difficulties... untilnow.

Veturna, an isolated, paradise world that was originally used as a resort planet lor war veterans (in the days when menwere stillneeded as soldiers). Overthe long years of the Terrain Empire's Reign Veturna had always remained neutral. Now it would seem that its neutrality had come to a close in relation to the other planets ol the

of the galaxy to two planets, Venturna and Omega Trion (a many times victorious world ol a warlike splinter of the race of man). The two alien cultures of course could not

from that day.

That day had at last come.

Namon's receptionist opened the door and informed him that a formalwar presentation had been requested.

Namon conceded at last after many hours of pacing that there was no way out of the predicament he was in and picked the picochip system up from the counter on which the haloprojecter sat. The lives of his planet's people were coming to a close.

Namon held no room for illusions, Venturna had no chance, tactionist from the peacful world had not been tought in actual warfare for genarations and the enemy was the victor of numerous previous battles, they were not noted for their mercy.

When he arrived at the presentation chamber Namon found his relalive opponent impatiantly waiting to get started. Namon considered the encounter depressingly anti-climatic, the Governorwas a small man of perhaps thirty years who had a bland face with drooping eyes and athin body, almost like a stickfigure. At Namon's arrival the two diplomats promply presented their cases to the great war computer. G.O.D.D. was also somewhat of

a disappointment, Namon had pictured a mamoth machine with blinking LEDs and bristling wires, over which hung an ominus aura of threat. The computerwas really a black box about a meler square with an information access slot and a few communication leed wires. First the loriegn Governor inserted his picosystem and then Namon lollowed suit.

When he paused as the machine processed the inlormation Namon noticed that there was athick layer of dust that coated the computer. Later he would learn that the information neededto repare G.O.D.D. had been lost in the numerous wars lought throughout the galaxy.

The diplomats then returned to their shelters and waited for the final results. They were prepared for the expected results, whatever they might be, but all the preparation and the training that went into a diplomatic education could not prepare them for the final results. ln the darkened communications chamber no one had waited to see the smoke poorout of the plain box, no one saw the curcuits fry that relayed tactics to fighting equipment. The only inlormation that had been issued were surender conditions. Wthout lurther information there was only one possible response, spontanious, mutual surrender.

G.O.D.D. in his infinite wisdom declared peace.

86

The mind ol Thomas Wilkins, district attorney at large,

proved to be an immediate success, though this meant

was racing from one denunciation to the next in tempo with the click-click-clicking of some loose part of the almost antique Corvette. The reason for his low spirits consisted of much more than the expected "Monday blues." On top of the usually increased pile of work that

that the poor expensive cbject had become soiled through constant handling. lts silk frocks which had

the end of the weekend atways brought, he was bothered by atelegram from his brotherdemanding his immediate

journey to Masonville, Pennsylvania, a small city about an hourfrom his home in Philadelphia. lt seemed that his

brother's wife, who had often contracted long rare illnesses, had died suddenly in her sleep overthe weekend from a heart attack. This left his brother alone in a big country house with the charge of his smallfive year-old doughter.

"Why is it," Thomas thought grimly while stopping at a main street stoplight in a hillside village, 'that these things always occur at the most bothersome times?"

The light changed and both mind and motor took off running again. He had decided to visit his brother during this most busy time lor public relations reasons only,

since being a well-known lawyer meant your picture in

the gossip column ol the high society newspapers.

Bringing gifts had seemed the proper thing to do, so Thomas had picked out a volume or two of classic literature bound in quality leatherwith gold edged pages for his brother and an expensive antique china dolllor his niece.

The doll had attracted his immediate attention in the qpaint, off-the beaten-path shop where he had stumbled across it. lt had looked costly, which had helped its cause a bit, and something about it cried out to the prospective buyer. With long brown curls, painted black eyebrows, piercing blue eyes and red tips, it was a typicaldoll made duringthe late 1800's. The lips partedto revealtwo rows of perfect white teeth, which caused the dollto look out upon the world with a stern grimace on her face. lt had seemed to be staring at him and that stare had drawn him like a magnet.

'Anprays, allgirls love dolls, I know. ljust hope that the little brat doesn't beat the thing to death; sevety-tive dollars is a lot to pay for a piece of porcelain!" With this he braked in lront of the country cottage and smoothed his newly styled hair before proceeding to the door.

The first few days of Thomas's stay were hectic and didn't allowfor much time to attackthe business workthat beckoned lrom its bed in the monogrammed 100% genuine leather brielcase. On presenting the gifts to his kin he received little thanks from the elder; the volumes quickly lound theirway to the bookshelf where they were

doomed

to rest indefinitely. The doll, however, had

arrived at the cottage inn prefect condition had become stained as the child had eaten, slept, and played with her dollie. Doll and young one had become inseparable, perhaps as an act of love for her uncle, or perhaps as a substitute for him. Nevertheless, as many times as it had been explained, the girl had not understood that "polly," as she had named her, was a collector's item and belonged on the shelf.

The brother had made himself more and more scarce and had spent more and more time shut up in his room where he could mourn in peace. He had easily dumped

the responsibilities of the house and child upon the shoulders of his brother Thomas and had been grateful for any small bit of the chores that Thomas actually had managed to accomplish. ln this manner uncle and niece had come to spend a

great deal of time together, much to the dismay of Thomas, who was never much fond of children. He had taken out the leather case on more lhan one occasion and had lelttheyoungoneto herowndevices. One night while Thomas was adding and re-adding a particlularly troublesome column of figures, the smail fry padded up to him and watched the man she so deeply admired at work.

"Conlounded calculator can't add worth nothing," he bellowed, hurling the contraption across the living room.

To this the girllurned on foot to go after it, but spiiled her orange juice which was siting on the corner of the table.

This would have been repairable untilthe liquid flowed all over lhe business papers of her uncle.

Thomas turned in rage to the child. ,'How dare you

touch my papers, let alone spill on them! Go to your room!" With this he slapped his niece d lew times and practically threw her out into the hall.

It was a major setback, and the extremely upset lawyer was heading back to the table when a leeling of fear unexplainedly washed over him. He found himself face to lace with the piercing blue eyes and the ugly smile which had caught his attention in the now-distant store a

few days back. What had seemed merely unpleasant then was downright frightening now, and Thomas lound himsell thinking, perhaps verbalizing, what an ugly crea-

ture it was. He was leeling that he could not be content working so near the beast and he defily deposited the thing on a sofa across the room.

As the hours passed, he found his concentration breaking and the glances toward that far corner ol the room become more lrequent. Finally,leeling a sudden

87

A Bump in the Nightl cont'd.

chill, Tomdecidedthat itwastime he retiredlorthe night.

Turning out the light, he departed with an occasional backward and hurried glance.

There were no city sounds to sing him to sleep that night and his mind kept drifting lorm one aspect of the business world to the next. ln between these thoughts, however, were the images that brought a deep sense of dread. "Maybe I'lljust do a few more figures..."

The attorney crossed the room and stepped outside into the perfectly still house. He could hear the raspy breaths of his niece accompanied by the long whistling tones coming out of the mouth of his brother. He headed down the stairs and into the room where his important papers lay. Slowly and carefully he made his way to the table. ln the darkness of the quarters he could only make out the outline of the mahogany table, the hutch and the

horrible sofa. His heart quickened as he strained his eyes against his own willfor a glimpse of the china doll. She was not there. Hurriedly, with a sense of sheer terror, he ran across the room...

A resounding clunk, the sound of a slack of papers falling, andthen allwas quiet. From herplace on the lloor underneath the f eet of the victim, she could not survey the scene as well as she would have liked. Rising in orderto circle the prone figure at the base of the mantlepiece, a smile crossed her pale white lace. Her painted ruby lips were parted, turned up to the fullest in a lrue and sincere smile. "Ah yes," she thought, "this is good."

The Glitch of the Stars The glitch of the stars The galooks of the sky What are these things?

Or should we ask why?

So many questions Without any answers It's as confusing as Hunting a green panther.

The trials and tribulations W. go through each day Are really quite amusing ln a sense ol the way.

Everybody together ls no more There is no friendship To look for.

was alljust a dream Of someone's thought And like many others, l,loo, got caught.

It

Caught in a lie Of someone's dream A dream that becomes a nightmare One that makes me scream.

So get me out now Belore I get in too deep For the soul I have now l'rl rcally like to keep.

The glitch of the slars The galooks of the sky What are these things?

Or should we ask why?

Kacey Kirk

Photo by Kacey Kirk

88

'.i

,u'P'"'u

Illustration by Chuck Ray

B9

Stumbling, the child linally came to a stop. She could go nolurther. The riverwaswide anddeepand she could

not swim. Screaming hysterically, she cried as if her heart would break and she hoped it would. Behind her she could hear the voices of her pursuers.

"She's down by the river! I saw her run that a'way!"

"We gots her nowl She can't cross water, remember?"

They came upon the little ragged waif, huddled between the roots of a sprawling tree. Maybe she thought if she made hersell very tiny, they would pass her by, like

they always did. But stillthey came, their faces twisted with rage, fear, and superstition.

"Filthy demon!" spat a plain looking woman brandishing a butcher knife. "What have you done to our kids?"

She took a menacing step toward the trembling child.

"You answer me or I'll . . ."

'You'll do nothing, Ellie. She's just a little girl, and for the love of God, woman, put that knife away," spoke Paul Wakefield, the town doctor.

"Whose side you on anyways, Doc?" spoke Andy, Ellie's husband.

"Certainly not the side of a crowd of adults acting like ignorant children. Please, go home neighbors. Leave the poor girl alone."

The tallyoung man stepped out ol the crowd, shouldering past Ellie and kneeling beside the child.

"Kristina, it's me, Paul. lt's all right; no one's going to hurt you."

Kristina turned her large blue eyes toward him. Her mouth was open, but only small, hoarse sounds came

from it.

The doctor spun around and faced the townspeople.

His eyes llashed and the hot afternoon sun caused them to blaze with white hot fury.

"She's only a child? Why do you have to have a scapegoat for everything that goes wrong around here?

Little Kristina never bothers anyone, and in return, you labed her a freak," he stormed.

"Ye lhink yer so grand with yer citilied ways, Doc? How do you 'count f er the dyin'off of half the childrens in this town?" demanded Ellie, still holding her knife.

"Which sickness does it say in your books kilt my nephew, Andrew, and Becky's daughter, Sary? Well, doc? Ye don't have an answer and I knows it? My ma learnt me when I was but a chile how to know black magic Tears slreamed down the woman's when I sees face, "l'll not have her alive laughin' over the grief she's caused!" she snarled breaking Paul's grip on her. She lunged at Kristina and was caught from the side by her husband. His fury turned to compassion as his wife

it."

collapsed to the ground. Awkwardly, he rocked her back and forth in his arms.

"Ellie, darlin, you know we alll miss Andrew and Sary and John and all our kids. . ." He looked up at the wide eyed child who cringed beneath his gaze, " . . .but there's awaywe dealwith heathens and ruinin'a good knife ain't the way."

Paul crouched on the ground staring through the brush atthe river. He took in the hostile murmurs around him. Andy and Ellie were quietly sobbing over the lost nephew. They remembered the night when Andrew had been taken f rom them burning with a fever that would not obey the doctor's medicines. Then there was a Junior and Hester Roberts. They were newly married and had been excepting theirlirst child (due only f ive months after the wedding to the town gossip's dismay-or delight).

Paul closed his eyes against the memory of the cold, gray, lileless thing she had given birth to. ln the weeks that followed more children fell to the strange ailment. Soon the townspeople became suspicious ol any child who was alive and well. lt was Cassie Wright, the old librarian who had begun the witch stories.

Kristina was the "town's very own orphan", whom everyone drew lots each week for, simply because no one wanted the shy, lrail slip of a girl.

"You're all so quick to judge, but so slow to understand. lt,s just a disease! Does anybody realize that until

now not one of you cared if Kristina was alive? Now, suddenly, because she's not dead and your children are, she becomes awitch-no, a demon! She's a demon, and you've alltaken it upon yourselves to kill herl" He jumped up,searching through the crowd. He found his target immediately. Calmer now, he addressed the librarian. "Cassie, why in the world did you start these rumors?" His gaze burned through her.

The old maid looked up. She made a nervous show of adjusting her spectacles. 'Why, why, I never said such a thing. I was simply tellin' Hester that there had t'be a

reason

for her baby bein' stillborn and all,

and...and...'sides, I wasn't sayin' that there's a witch amongst us," she glanced at Hester,linding only a reflection of herguilt. Sheturnedto leave, "...jestthat it smacks o'the evil eye." With that she turned and hobbled away on her arthritic legs.

Hester burst into tears, her habit when she was at a loss lor words. "l'm sorry, it's jest that..." "l know, I know, Hester. Just like Ellie said. There's got to be a reason, and since I haven't got one, you'll invent yourown." The f iery passionwas gonef rom Paul's

eyes. ln it's place was pity. "Go home, Hester," he said softly, "go home."

90

Witch Huntl cont'd.

Hester turned slowly and, still crying softly, walked home. The othertownspeople, deprived ol their leaders, soon left.

Paulwatched them go. Slowly his stomach uncurled and he breathed a sigh of relief . "Thank God," he said to himself. His new lound composure was shattered by a

Perchance to Dream

wailing scream, which abruptly cut off. He gave a strangled cry and whirled around. Ellie was standing over Kristina, stillclutching the knife, her hands stained crimson. He stared at the blood on her hands.

Paul leapt at the woman at the same time Ellie's husband lired his gun. The doctor crashed to the grou nd,

A rip in the fabric of time and space A dead couple locked in an icy embrace These things I spy When I gaze deep inside This crystaline web of illusion

dead.

A clipper ship tallwith a hull made of glass A building that bends like a willow ln the dark ol the night I am stripped of my sight And my mind is a pawn of illusion

"Like I said, darlin', there's a proper way t'deal with heathens," said Andy, a slow smile spreading across his face. They both laughed hysterically. Later, when they reached the town, they told their shocked neighbors how Doc had killed the poor orphan girl and Andy had been forced to shoot him. There were no more mysterious deaths.

A statue that laughs with a voice you can see And a bird that wings on solar winds Like a will-o-the-wisp I am slave to this gift To lhis Pandora's box of illusions A gargon that sings me a sweet lullaby A road with an eye-stalk and tendrils What dark vein have I tapped

That I find mysell trapped ln a land that is ruled by illusion?

A ghost-carriage drawn by eight tiny reindeer Or a broadsword that bleeds on its owner I emerge from my shell To this prismatic hell And draw back from these dreaded illusions A zombie approaches and greets me by name And my true love elopes with my portrait

Through the sweet by-and-by From my lips comes a cry ln my anguish I curse the illusions By the moonlight an ivory fang seeks my throat And a beast lrom the darkness pursues me Like a terrified child I dash four-second miles As I seek to escape these illusions

Photo by Kacey Kirk

Then the pitch-dark gives way to a glorious dawn And lwake to the splendor of morning ln my grief I attempt To return if lcan... ...1.1;, acidiclion is to the illusions

- Keil Hubert

91

The Schoolroom Caged

by Kristen Hellriegel I

I look around the school room which I have looked at so manytimes before. Thefamiliarthings around mefor some reason seem to look unfamiliar. lfeelas if I am a child in aroomfull of strangers. All staring at mewithcold, empty, glass-like eyes. I feel as if a thousand stones have been placed upon my chest. lgasp, hoping desperately to breathe just one breath into my lungs. The room starts to lill with water. I try to move to the door but cannot reach, for my legs are like heavyweights. The water rises higherand higher. lwon'tbeableto hold mybreath much

longer. A loud noise pounds inside my head. I jump to myfeet. My hands are sweaty, my bodycold. I noticethe people piling out the door. Class is over. lt's time for next hour.

wish I could be set free

of this cage that controls

my every thought and every move ldon't like it here.

I'm interrogated my life is invaded it's broken apart.

They pullthe chains so tight it hurts.l need to f ly,

to run, to sing, to... escape.

l'm neglected.

The guard doesn't take pride in her only prisoner. l'm one of a kind, Am I not what she wanted?

She captured me herself, keeps me for her very own, yet l'm still her most unwanted shame.

She cuts me down,strips me of my pride, keeps me from my own world of content and happiness.

I am lorced to become part of the other worldthe world of the perfect, land of the simple.

I am locked up larther and farther from my world, my security

Stillthe hallof hope grows longer, the days more dismal, the chains tighter with every pressure{illed hour of life in this cage.

- I.A.B.

Photo by Kacey Kirk

92

Andrew Winslow awoke to lind himsell half covered with mud and totally covered with leaves. He was lying in a decaying ravine. His head ached and his right leg throbbed from the acute pain in his shin but he did not move. His lile depended on remaining silent. He remembered allthat heroictalkf rom back home in Georgia, how stupid he had been. He wondered what the real reason was forthe war. The country was too young to be feuding with itself.

He listened carefully at the sounds around him. He heard a couple of horses come in his direction. Andrew whispered under his breath,"A Yankee!" "l saw one of those damned Rebels lly off his horse somewhere! Swore a young soldier of the Union Army."

The young soldier was close to 16 years old as was his companion. ""He must've hid like a scared rat. Typical of a traitor!"

The Union Force had invaded while Andrew and live other Conlederate Cavalry soldiers were patroling the woods around Vicksburg, Mississippi. Seven Yankees had chased the Rebels lor about two miles through the underbrush. Andrew's horse caught its foot in a rabbit's hole and flndrew was thrown over a hedge, down the ravine where he lay now. His leg was twisted in an unnatural position under a fallen rotted tree.

The two Union Soldiers looked through the brush a while longer then decided to go back to camp lor dinner.

Andrew relaxed a little only to llinch lrom the throbbing pain. He sat up to look at the blood-stain-covered pant leg for the first time. Then he lay back again from the agony of the unbearable pain. "Now what the hell am I

do?" After he sorted through his extreme circumstances, he determinedto somehowlix his leg and seek some shelter belore dark.

Gritting his teeth, he managed to move the old log olf his leg. Finding a sturdy branch lwo feet away lrom his left leg, he tied it to his shin with his sweat soaked neakerchief. He sat for a moment to catch his breath, saying a short prayer, then grabbed for a nearby tree branch to begin the struggle to get to his feet. Slowly, trying not to irritate the leg any more, he staggered to his leet. Just as he stood up straight, the branch broke and he fell to the ground exhausted. Panting for oxygen, Andrew ponderedwhether it would be safe to stay in the ravine. "No, I must lind shelter and food." He found a f airly strong branch lrom a newly f allen tree and used it as a cane.

As he walked, he smelled wood burning, bacon f rying, and bread baking. He looked up to see black smoke slreaming out of a fire place. The lireplace was craftively connected to a two story house. Andrew debated the

going to

house. He had to go inside; the lemperature was already dropping as the sun had done moments saf ety ol the

earlier.

Andrew staggered up the path that led to the porch.

As he clumsily climbed up the steps, he passed out.

When he awoke, Andrew found himself wrapped in warm blankets and washed clean, next to a blazing fire.

The mantle contained a portrait ol a family. Andrew's attention was drawn to the young woman in the portrait.

She was remarkably beautilul. She had golden blonde flowing hair and eyes like emeralds. "The artist must have exaggerated her beauty," he thought to himslef . He couldn't believe how beautiful she was.

"So the gentleman likes looking at portraits?"

Andrew jolted from the surprise of hearing a voice. He glanced up to find the very same emerald eyes but wilh curious fleks of gold. The very lady he had just admired inthe portraitwas standing belore him smiling a soothing grin.

"Uh. . .yes mam, I guess I do," he studdered, dumbfounded. Her movements were like a gentle breeze, gracefully llowing around the room as she finished preparing dinner. Her long, blonde hairframed her perfect body.

She placed a bowl of bean soup in lront of Andrew on the mahogony coff ee table. She then walked overto the window and looked out into the night as if she was expecling someone.

"My name is Miss Sarah Breckinridge. I live here in this house with my parents Joseph and Andelya and my youngerbrotherJohn. They have gone to my aunt Sarah Elizabeth and should be home soon."

Andrew bent over to pick up the bowl ol soup and a silver spoon. Forthe lirst time since he awoke he noticed his leg was no longer wrapped in the crude splint but instead was washed and wrapped in a clean, cotton bed sheet that had been torn into strips. The bleeding had

obviously stopped but the constant throbbing still remained.

"Did you do allthis?"

"Yes, Mister. . .Mister. . ."

"Mister Andrew Winslow, Mam." "Yes, Mister Winslow, I brought you inside, lixed your leg, andwill nowfeedyou. I amcurious toknow howyou

came by such a break in your leg.:' Sarah joined him in eating the soup.

Andrew told her of the chase and how he had been thrown from his horse. 'Those Yankees looked allover for me but by God's grace they never found me."

"Yankees?" Sarah was confused and curious.

"Now don't worry Miss Breckinridge. I am sure by morning the Conlederate army will have them f lying back

The Night

Visitl cont'd.

to the North for safety. Andrew spoke with pride for the South that had seceded from the Union.

"Would you like some more soup, Mr. Winslow?"

Reaching for his bowl, Sarah dipped the ladle into the simmering soup and gave Andrew another bowlfull.

"Thank you, Mam," he took the bowl once again f rom Sarah. "You know, I cannot help but admire your fireplace. There is something special about it."

Sarah flashed him a smile that sent chills racing up his spine. "lf you will notice the carving on the hearth. That is our family's symbol, the unicorn. lt stands for the eternal search fortruth, peace, and love. My great-grandmother believed in unicorns. Do you? Sarah put Andrew on the spot.

"Uh. . .No Mam, I suppose ldon't."

"Thal's good, neither do 1." She laughed, sending her laughter through the room like a ring from a bell.

Andrew would like to have spent the rest of the night talking to this enchanting girlwho loved to chat. But he always seemed to have poor timing with women and this

93

were going to lallout. "Did you say Sarah Breckinridge?"

That's impossible! She died exactlyf ifteen years ago last night in a fire!" The doctor began to laugh. "You must have gotten thje names mixed up when you were delirious from the pain and loss of blood."

Andrew could not believe what he was hearing. He had so many questions to ask but the doctor went on lo the next patient.

A couple ol months passed and the war went to

Georgia. Andrew was released from the hospital and given two weeks leave lrom the Army. He was curious to soo if he had dreamed that night in thje house or if it really happened.

He went back to where he had thought the house had been. The only thing he saw was a meadow overgrown and a crumbled fireplace. Andrew remembered thje carving on the hearth and run to see if it was there. All he

found was a hole in the ground where th e hearth had been. lt could have been the same tunnelthat had saved his lile. He didn't want to find out.

was no exception. As he finished his third helping ol soup, he heard horses ride up to the house. At first they thought it was Sarah's family, but they found out it was three Union soldiers. Andrew began to panic and so did Sarah.

Sarah peeked out the window. 'They are searching the barn. Are these the men who chased you?"

"Yes, Miss Breckinridge! lthink we shoud find a place to hide and quick! They've come to kill me!"

See the hearth, Sarah pointed toward the fireplace hearth. "lt is atrapdoor! Lift it, climb downthe ladder, and follow the tunnel. lt should take you to the river bed. Now gol" Just as she finished whispering, a pounding was heard on the door.

"Where will you hide?" Andrew was concerned because she stood near the door and showed no sign of moving. "l have another place that is very safe. Now go, and may God bless you!" The pounding on the door became more demanding.

"Thank you, Miss Breckinridge, for all your help."

Andrew hopped downthje ladderon his leftfoot. The trap door fell to the lloor above his head. He looked around the smalltunnel. There was no sound from thje house, just silence.

The tunnel did lead to thje river bed where Andrew was able to find thje Conlederate forces. He told thejm of thje invasion and where they could find the Union forces. A young dictortookAndrewto thej mobil hospital.

There he stayed while his leg healed. The doctor said he was lucky to have had it cleaned and wrapped, olherwise he would have lost his leg. "lt was the Miss Sarah Breckinridge who helped me.

Do you know her?" Andrew asked thje doctor.

"Who?" The doctor choked and looked as if his eyes

the days grow long and the days grow short, the children grow old and die, the skies above have become a sport now that man has learned to fly. the ground is blank and then furrowed, the cities on it lie, the men then work on time that's borrowed, so children can grow old and die.

the earth is great with the sun's light, the air is just so high..., in the distance the planets are bright now that man has learned to fly. the mountains crumble then rise, the valleys quake and sigh, the lakes and seas whisper their demise earth itself willdie. the sun shallswell in red, the worlds then must burn, the gases their last have bled so in darkness, outward we turn. the universe must outward roll, then for a ricment, still it must lie, then with gravity, it implodes, like a scrolt, and then where will little men lly.

- Kendall Smitn

94

was a crisp day in late October as the Steven's lamily beganto unloadtheirrented movingvan. Thewind whipped through the open doorway of the 125 year old home which had been given to the family when Janet Steven's greatgrandmother, no longer able to care for It

the large home alone, moved into a nearby nursing home.

Janet's lour year old son, Tommy, played in the newly f allen leaves which covered the majority of the f ront lawn.

He looked up in awe at a squirrelthat had made its way to the top of an oak tree, the branches of which scraped against the roof of the lading white two-story structure.

Tommy's father, Jason, called to his son as the last of their belongings were unloaded from the truck and carried up the creaking front steps to their new home.

The young lamily had great hopes forthe beautilulold home and immediately set to work unpacking their be-

longings. lt was decided that those boxes containing itemswhichwould no longerbe neededwereto be stored in the cellar of the home.

Janet made her way down the narrow basement stainaray with a box of assorted gardening tools that would not be used untilthe spring. A musty smellsurrounded her as she reached the bottom step. She groped along the cold, damp wall flailing her arm through the heavy darkness in search ol the cord that would turn on the only source of light for the entire basement. Her fingers closed around a lrayed cord and a single light filled the centerof the roomwith a harsh glare, leavingthe edges in murky shadows. She quickly surveyed the area, her glance falling on what had once been used as a storage bin for coal, almost overlooking a small wooden door and lifted the rusted latch. The warped door swung open on creaking hinges to reveal a low-ceilinged room made completely ol dirt, its only source ol light a small windowlromwhich a shaft of sunlight erupted, slicingthe blackness in two. From wood beams embedded in the dirt ceiling, hung several kerosene lanterns, corroded wilh time, suspended from which were monstrous cobwebs.

From the top of the stairway, she heard her husband's call and shivered, trying to shrug ofl the erie feeling the room emitted. Securing the latch behind her, she ascended the stairway, searching her memory lor some

recollection of having seen this room as a child, while spending time at her great-grandmother's home. She was unable to do so.

The following weeks passed quickly. During this time, Janet was unable to overcome the uneasy feelings she had while passing lhe basement doonruay.

One dreary aflemoon, as dark clouds threatened

snow, Janet put Tommy down for his nap and began to unpack and put away her china in the antique buffet which had once belongedto hergreat-grandmother. As she reached into the far corner of a drawer, her hand closed around a wom black book. As she withdrew the book to examine it further, she heard the faint call of a child lrom the depths of the basement. Wondering how Tommy could have gotten past her, she dropped the book into the drawer and quickly descended the stairway to the basement, the callof "Mommy" growing stronger as she neared the open door to the dirt cellar. As she crossed the threshold calling Tommy's name, she tripped over a tattered baseball, which had gone unnoticed in her previous visit. As her eyes became accustomed to the darkness, she realized her son was not in the room. Closing the door behind her and quickly searching the remaining basement without result, she franticly rushed to Tommy's second floor bedroom and

found him sleeping peacefully, undisturbed. She returned to the first floor to start dinner, convincing herself that it must have been the children next door playing in the backyard.

Several days later, while feeding Tommy lunch, Janet heard the crying of a child from the basement. She became alarmed, recalling the incident of a few days earlier. She picked up Tommy and cautiously entered the basement to f ind the door to the dirt cellar once again open. Hugging Tommy closely, she stepped into the dirt

cellar and to her dismay, Tommy began to cry, begging to retum to the main floor.

Later while relaying the incidents of the past days to her husband, Janet remembered the book in the buffet drawer and went to retrieve it. She found the book to be an old family Bible. Upon inspection, she lound a famity tree beginning with the birth of her great, great grandmother. As she followed the branches down through the generations, she came uponthe name of a male, written in such a place that it would have made him her greatgrandmother's brother. She had always assumed her great-grandmother was an only child, for she had never spoken of another sibling. According to the lamily iree, her great-grandmother had a brother who died when he was lour and she was eight. A yellowed photograph fluttered to the f loor as she took the Bible to show Jason.

It was a picture of a young boy who bore a striking resemblance to pictures she had seen of her greatgrandmother as a young child. She was f rightened by the incidents of the previous days and with this puzzling new discovery which she had just made. She decided to pay a visit to her great-grandmother.

The next day, Janet took the Bible and went to seek

The

Dirt Cellarl cont'd.

some sort of an$^/er from her great-grandmother. Her explanation honified Janet, that something so ghasily could have occured in herfamily's past. According to her great-grandmother, she indeed did have a younger brother, born deformed and retarded, whose existence was not made known to the outside world. For in those days, lamilies with children such as her brother were shunned by society. He was said to have died at birth, but in reality he was kept in the dirt cellar when the family entertained. When he was four, a tenible tragedy occured there. Her brother had accidently hung himself on a harness suspended from the wallof the cellar. He was never given a proper burial, just simply placed in a box

.95 At night while a[ things steep Beneath the frosty rmon The secrets of the wortd are kept ln the land of childrens dreams Where the difference ... ... of order And chaos ls defined as peace!

-

and buried in the f lower bed behind the home, so as to not arouse the suspicions of the public.

Her greatgrandmother begged her, now that the story was revealed, to bury him properly and with him the terrible mernories of the past, linalty putting his spirit to reSt. Her wishes were granted and the boy was placed in the family burialplot.

Never again were the cries from the basement heard!

Photo by Kacey Klrk

Kenilall Smith

96

The Nightmare Force feelthe pulsing walls Flickering like a dullllame Slowly, the walls press Squeezing the breath The very life out of me Without a warning The walls disappear I'm standing in a room Surrounded by a purple haze A sharp, acrid odor I

Fills my nostrils I turn to face A being ol lerror Formless

Colorless Yet black as night ln a voiceless scream He calls to me I callout weakly My strength has mysteriously vanished It is an effort To recall my own name He reachess out To fill his vacuum With my soul I struggle leebly But to no avail As his presence sucks The marrow ol my soul lfeel my essence slipping Ebbing away wirh a jolt I awaken My screams echo Across my bedroom My parents rush in Assure me it was "only a dream" Then leave I look in the corner

And catch a glimpse Of his being Waiting For my eyelids to fall And he waits And he waits And he waits.

- Crysania

Creature of the Night Creature of the Night, do you comprehend the things you've done? ls everything you do not right?

Do you always hate the sun?

Creature ol the Light, is all that you do for good?

Think abbut your narrow sight; does it all end as it should?

Creature of the Night, who sees himself as Hell, you always fight against the right.

Are you sure you do it well?

Creature of the Light, who sees himself as pure, you always plot the right, Of it, are you sure?

Creature with the only sight, tell me, can these ever be: No trace of darl<ness in the light, or a dark in which you cannot see?

Faustus

97

Illustration by Chuck Ray

98

99

INDEX OF AUTHORS Ame.. ....1,29 Baker,Whitney ......96 Bantz, Keni. . . .. .. . .Sg Botonis .IZttG)zr Bradford,Heather .. X"Gt Bums,Tina.. ...4,9,69 Capocasa,Ann.. ....90 Cerre,Shannon .....36 Clark,KarenR.... .........9 Clark,Joe.. .........19 Comer, Kristey ....20,g2,gg,556j.l Cook, Angi . .. .69 Cox,Amy ......24,91,49,49,52 Crysania .20,29,68,71;96 Davis,Angela ........6 Douthitt, Darlene . .56,99 Elmo. .. .. ...14 Emmel, Kristen ... 16,19 Evans, Johnnie . . .. .51 Fankhauser,Audra ........65 Faustus .....96 Fealher ......44 Fisher,Stacie ....... i4 Fuqua,Stephanie .. tO,ITgz,at George, Jenny . .l.tS.g+ Ge Zax @ Georke, Jenni. ... .4pJGrimes,Tiffani .....4,69 Hedlund, Danielle . .41,42 Hellriegel,Kristen ....91

Hubeil, Keil. .

J.A.B. Jansson, Suzi..

Kay, Jay Keldy,Scoam Kirk, Kacey Knowles, Danielle

.49,52,90 . . .....91

.... .ll . 10 ......-lg .. ..

.....71,19,97

....22

Lambert,Lara..

Chris.

Lori..

Madden,Angela Moody, Kim. .

Oppenheimer, Quinn Pitonak, Audrey Randi.

Reida,Anna.

Reis, Mari Reyrrclds, Michelte Rhea, Anissa Robbins,Heidi.

Sinpson,Mafi.

Skelton,John.

Smith, Kendat!

Smith, Stacey Taylor, Kimi..

Taybr,Sharrvn Trowbridge, Audrey Young,Gavin Zacharias, Phyltis

.....tr!

Layton, Lindsey,

..g,Zl,7g ...A2,29

.....15

..41,49,22 .19,26, 2g,Sl,lg . . .16, 20, 91, 69

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12,11

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...50.54

@.'.84,9i,95 ...

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....40,29 ...29.69 .11,

g6,Fd 79

....Y.a9

....92

INDEX OF ILLUSTRATIONS Lisa ...12 Davis,Angela .....6,7,27,10,93 Douthin,Darlene ....56 g,21,gz E&vards, Mike.

Hedlund, Danielle ....06,41,45 Hope,Keith. ........91 lngram,Tina.. ......29 Kirk, Kacey . . .51 ,78, A2, Bl, g0, gl , gs Allen,

Mike.

Christina Ray,Chuck Riley,Juli Skelton,John.

Taylor,Sharn Trowbrftlge,Audrey McGlothlin, Pristed,

....19 .. . . .24 ....62,67,90,99,97

.....99

......14

.....12, i9 ......65.6g

100

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