Healthy Living February 2017

RELATIONSHIPS ARE EVERYTHING

“A flower cannot blossom withhout sunshine and man cannot live without love.”

—Max Muller

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Dr. Will Barsoum joined the team at Cardiovascular Associates in January 2017. To say he is thrilled about this exciting opportunity would be an understatement.

“The practice has developed an excellent reputation because the doctors are ethical, knowledgeable, and caring,” he said. “I share their vision of delivering quality cardiovascular care to the wonderful residents of Lake County.”

Dr. Barsoum attended medical school at St. George’s University School of Medicine in Grenada and completed a residency and two fellowships at Seton Hall University in New Jersey. He brings a unique skill set to Cardiovascular Associates and is experienced in treating peripheral vascular disease and pulmonary embolism.

“For me, it’s a major milestone whenever I can improve a patient’s quality of life and increase their longevity.”

He previously practiced in Lake County for more than two years before moving to Orlando.

“I’m happy to be returning to the area. This is where I want to raise my family. We have the best of both worlds. There is plenty of nature, but you don’t have to look far for shopping and entertainment.”

Your partners for life

CONTENTS

February 2017

THERE’S

FEATURING

23 // WHAT IS LOVE?

Love is the most important emotion a person can feel. It gives us a sense of belonging and enables us to perform acts of goodwill. When we experience love is when we feel the most alive. This month, we are looking at love through the eyes of siblings, parents, pets, friends, and married couples.

36 // WOMEN HEART

Heart disease is an often misdiagnosed and misunderstood disease in women. To help combat this, a group of ladies in The Villages formed a local chapter of WomenHeart, a national organization that promotes women’s heart health through advocacy, education, and patient support.

42 // FACEBOOK PHILANTHROPY

Facebook can have a greater purpose than merely keeping up with friends. That’s what Umatilla resident Stacie Richter has discovered. She started a Facebook group called Stand Up to Stand Out to promote random acts of kindness across Lake County.

HEALTHYSPIRIT

ARE THOSE FLAMES STILL BURNING?

64 10 signs of a healthy relationship

SINGLES AND VALENTINE’S DAY

66 Do whatever your heart desires

DESIRE A HEALTHY RELATIONSHIP?

68 Then be assertive, not passive

HEALTHYFINANCE

BUDGETING: THE BUCK STARTS HERE

70 Tips to better manage your money.

MONEY, MARRIAGE, AND MANAGING

72 Achieving financial compatibility for couples.

@YOUR SERVICE

HOT OFF THE PRESS !

DIGITIZE YOUR LIFE.

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RELATIONSHIPS MATTER!

KENDRA AKERS / publisher/editor-in-chief kendra@akersmediagroup.com

DOUG AKERS / vice president doug@akersmediagroup.com

JAMIE EZRA MARK / chief creative officer jamie@akersmediagroup.com

EDITORIAL // DESIGN // PHOTOGRAPHY

LEIGH NEELY managing editor leigh@akersmediagroup.com

JAMES COMBS staff writer james@akersmediagroup.com

THERESA CAMPBELL staff writer theresa@akersmediagroup.com

FRED LOPEZ / chief photographer fred@akersmediagroup.com

JASON FUGATE creative director jason@akersmediagroup.com

VOLKAN ULGEN art director volkan@akersmediagroup.com

JOSH CLARK senior designer josh@akersmediagroup.com

MICHAEL GAULIN production director michael@akersmediagroup.com

CONTRIBUTING WRITERS // PHOTOGRAPHERS

FRED HILTON, JAIMIE ALONSO, DEBBI KIDDY, DR.E.C. GORDON, LIZ WILLIAMS, ANNE HALIFAX, BEE GREENE, SANDY L. PINSON, CHARLIE BENTLEY, SAMANTHA KAY, JAN BURCH

SALES // MARKETING

TIM MCRAE / vice president of sales tim@akersmediagroup.com

DAVID COTÉ advertising executive david@akersmediagroup.com

SYLVIA DUCOTE advertising executive sylvia@akersmediagroup.com

As human beings, it seems we are wired to be relational. Sure, there are some people who are more introverted and prefer a few close relationships, while there are others who are more extroverted and whose list of Facebook friends rivals a phone book. Regardless of personality type, everyone yearns for relationships. We all desire to be known and cared for, and we all want to know we make a difference in the life of someone else.

In this month of celebrating “love,” we attempted to get to the very heart of the issue: relationships. I am so excited to pass on what we learned to you, our readers, because it turns out, healthy relationships are a huge aspect of living a healthy lifestyle.

We have said it so many times before, in just about every one of the 101 issues of Healthy Living, that living a balanced lifestyle encompasses much more than being physically fit or eating healthy. You can be extremely fit, but if you are not nurturing the relationships in your life as much as you are your body, then your relationships will suffer, causing you stress and anxiety, and your life becomes unbalanced.

It is not always about your “love” relationships. All relationships are important. That is why in this month’s issue, we focus on parental relationships, siblings, coworkers, friendships, and much more.

MIKE STEGALL advertising executive mike@akersmediagroup.com

TINA MORRISON advertising executive tina@akersmediagroup.com

MELANIE MELVIN / director of client services melanie@akersmediagroup.com

ADMINISTRATION

DEB MATLOCK / office manager deb@akersmediagroup.com

AUBREY AKERS / marketing coordinator aubrey@akersmediagroup.com

SHAENA CHASTAIN / receptionist shaena@akersmediagroup.com

DISTRIBUTION

SCOTT HEGG / distribution manager scott.hegg@akersmediagroup.com

My advice is to take time every day to let the people in your life know you appreciate them and that you love them. It can be as simple as a smile or a kiss on the cheek. A small gesture can go a long way in improving and strengthening your relationships.

With Love,

Phone:

STRIKING GOLD

Central Florida Health was accredited with the CEO Cancer Gold Standard for its efforts in reducing cancer risk for its employees and covered family members.

The CEO Roundtable on Cancer, a nonprofit organization founded by former President George H.W. Bush, developed and administers the accreditation. Nearly 200 private, nonprofit, and government employers in a wide range of occupational categories have earned the CEO Cancer Gold Standard designation, including the National Cancer Institute.

“We are honored to be one of only three hospitals in the state of Florida to hold the CEO Gold Standard,” says Elizabeth Jernigan, cancer program coordinator at Central Florida Health. “It is an affirmation of the impact we are having on our team members’ lives.”

A HELPING HAND

South Lake Hospital is renowned for its use of the da Vinci Surgical System, which provides surgeons an alternative to open surgery and laparoscopy.

How does robotic surgery work? As the patient lies on an operating table, a surgeon sits several feet away at a console, where he or she commands the robotic arms and watches the procedure through a 3-D viewfinder. This allows surgeons to navigate the hard-to-reach places.

As of now, general surgeons, urologists, and obstetrics and gynecology physicians utilize the da Vinci Surgical system for various procedures. Patient benefits include less post-operative pain, less blood loss, less scarring, shorter recovery times, and a faster return to daily activities.

Q: A popular chiropractor recently celebrated his 32nd year of practicing in Clermont. Can you name him? Please make an educated guess before looking at the answer below.

After he graduated from the National College of Chiropractic in Chicago in 1984, he and his wife, Donna, relocated from Pittsburgh to Clermont. He currently practices on the South Lake Hospital campus. Congratulations and thanks for all your years of service.

TRIVIA TIME

A: Dr. Kenneth Felt.

When I was diagnosed with melanoma, I asked my doctor about InterCommunity Cancer Center in Lady Lake.

Only five minutes form my home, InterCommunity Cancer Center was amazing from the moment I walked in the door. They treated me like family and made me feel positive about what I was doing and the treatment I was receiving. I would recommend InterCommunity Cancer Center to anyone.

InterCommunity Cancer Center is part of The US Oncology Network, one of the nation’s largest networks of integrated, community-based oncology practices dedicated to advancing high-quality, evidence-based cancer care.

UN-LITTER LAKE

Flat tires lie on the side of a road. Household hazards such as lawnmowers and dead batteries sit unused on a front lawn. Broken beer bottles and cigarette butts tarnish a beautiful landscape.

Unfortunately, those are sights we sometimes see in Lake County. However, you can do your part in cleaning up and saving the environment.

Keep Lake Beautiful is a volunteer organization that is involved in dozens of projects, such as waterway cleanups, roadside litter pickups, and neighborhood and school beautification events. The organization is an affiliate of Keep American Beautiful, which focuses on building and maintaining vibrant communities.

For information on how you can become involved, please call 352.343.9639.

NEW YEAR, NEW YOU

Attention Lake County residents. We’re now one month into 2017, a year you vowed to achieve those lofty weightloss goals. Here are some practical tips to help you stay the course and keep from becoming frustrated or sidetracked.

Keep a food journal: This is very important because you have to know which foods help you lose weight and which make you gain weight. Be sure to include what, when, how much, and where you ate.

Make realistic goals: You are probably not going to lose 15 pounds in a week. Instead, set a more realistic goal of losing two pounds a week. This is much more achievable and will not leave you disappointed and likely to quit.

Exercise: People continue coming up with creative excuses as to why they cannot exercise. However, simply taking a 10-minute walk before work or taking an evening stroll around the neighborhood with a friend are good ways to incorporate exercise into your routine. Remember, exercise does not have to be tortuous.

Set an end date for your goals and make them realistic: This way, you will begin your weight-loss plan rather than putting it off.

Clean out your pantry: It would be wise to replace those Oreo cookies and potato chips with healthier options. Eliminating trigger foods from your home will prove extremely beneficial.

Lose with a friend: There is certainly nothing wrong with having someone to keep you motivated and hold you accountable. Moreover, a friendly competition will help you stay the course.

Our team…

…has the highest level of education and skill. …uses top-notch technology and equipment. …provides the best possible care to our patients. …is getting bigger.

Meet the newest team members.

Dr. Robert Purdon, a radiation oncologist for 30 years, loves being part of RBOI. While he feels honored to offer patients advanced technologies and techniques, the most rewarding part of the job is interacting and forming genuine relationships with patients.

DR. HERMAN FLINK

We’re excited to announce the addition of Dr. Herman Flink, a radiation oncologist in both radiology and radiation oncology. He completed his residency and fellowship at Johns Hopkins University.

THE VILLAGES 352.259.2200

OCALA 352.732.0277

TIMBER RIDGE 352.861.2400

INVERNESS 352.726.3400

LECANTO 352.527.0106

RBOI.COM

DR. ROBERT L. PURDON

TAKING A STAND

One young man stood while others around the country sat in protest.

Arek Trenholm, 16, of Leesburg, has spina bifida—a condition that impairs the development of the spinal cord—and has been in a wheelchair since he was six.

Even so, Arek is not defined by his disability. He is hailed by his family as a young patriot.

“He has always enjoyed parades and despite his disability, has determined to stand for our national anthem, as well as pledges and salutes to the American flag since he was a little boy,” says Arek’s mother, Deree Trenholm.

Recently, Arek’s Uncle Myron (Myron Leggett), a professional photographer in Leesburg, took a photo of Arek struggling to push himself up by his arms to stand and salute the flag as the Junior ROTC color guard passed him by at the homecoming parade in Leesburg. Myron posted the picture on Facebook to share with family and friends—and 23 billion hits later—his post was viral.

Asked how it felt to be a Facebook celebrity, Arek simply shrugged and smiled. Beyond the notoriety, however, the family had no idea how life-changing Uncle Myron’s picture and post would be.

The story was picked up by ABC News and caught the eye of Raymond Maczik, who immediately brought it to the attention of his brother, David Maczik, founder and president of The Standing Company in Saginaw, Michigan.

“It was moving to see Arek making the effort to do this and I felt he ought to be rewarded,” says David, a veteran of the U.S. Army and Army Reserves, who established his business more than 25 years ago to benefit veterans. The company’s philosophy is about helping people be as independent as possible by standing.

Scott Liesch, a representative for The Standing Company, is a quadriplegic and has been confined to a wheelchair for 15 years. For five years, he has delivered chairs and trained people how to use them for The Standing Company.

“I love my job. Helping other chair users, like Arek, is quite rewarding,” Scott says.

It was obvious receiving the chair was a very important moment for Arek and his mother. The smiles that shone through their tears were a reward for all watching.

WRITER: DEBBI KIDDY PHOTO: MYRON LEGGETT

IS IT LOVE AT FIRST SIGHT OR LOVE AT FIRST SCENT?

WRITER: FRED HILTON

There’s a great scene in “The Godfather” when Michael Corleone, played by Al Pacino, is hiding out in Sicily because he whacked a corrupt New York City police captain and a rival gangster. Michael is out walking with his bodyguards one day when they see a dark-haired Sicilian hottie named Apollonia. Michael stares intently at Apollonia. His heart goes pitter-patter and he virtually salivates.

The bodyguards giggle and one of them says that Michael has been struck by “the thunderbolt,” which apparently is Mafia-speak for “love at first sight.”

Apollonia shares the instant attraction with Michael and it’s obvious the two have the hots for one another. Soon afterward, they’re married and they live happily ever after—at least until Apollonia is blown to smithereens by a car bomb meant for Michael.

“The thunderbolt” and “love at first sight” are both delightful ways to refer to instant attraction but many authorities insist the phenomenon is created when we catch a whiff of pheromones. These are chemical triggers that cause natural behavior responses in another member of the same species. According to actforlibraries.org, “if you’re looking for the man or woman of your dreams, the scent of your body’s pheromones may be unsuspectingly playing a large and very clever role in mate attraction.”

Neuroscientist Dr. Trisha Strafford told The Huffington Post that the reason pheromones are so important “is because a woman can smell a man—I think it’s from 10 feet away—and what they are smelling is their immune system. In a partner, you are looking for an immune system that is compatible with yours but also different, so you have healthy offspring.”

The time required for this sniff test of romance is an astonishing 300ths of a second, Dr. Stafford said.

The online dating website eHarmony said that in a 1995 study “several men were asked to wear the same T-shirt for two days in a row, and then those stinky Tees were submitted to unsuspecting females for a sniff test.” The women chose the sweaty aromas of the guys whose DNA was least like theirs.

“Animals have demonstrated this behavior for centuries,” eHarmony said. “Dogs sniff one another’s rear ends not only to say hello, but to gather as much information as they can about a strange, new pooch from the odors it emits. Just by sniffing, they can tell if the fellow canine is happy or unhappy, healthy or unhealthy, friend or foe.”

This type of behavior is not recommended for your next dinner party.

Sources “Is Love at First Sight Real? Turns Out There’s Actual Science Behind This Fairytale Phenomenon,” by Marisa Riley, Bustle, bustle.com, May 12, 2014 https://www.bustle.com/articles/24180-is-love-at-first-sight-real-turns-out-theres-actual-sciencebehind-this-fairytale-phenomenon - “Human Pheromones Genetic Mapping Love at first Sight Physical Attraction Find,” Actforlibraries.org

http://www.actforlibraries.org/human-pheromones-genetic-mapping-love-at-first-sight-physical-attraction-find/ - “We Talk To A Neuroscientist About Love At First Sight,” by Emily Blatchford, Associate Lifestyle Editor, HuffPost Australia, The Huffington Post, July 21, 2016 http://www.huffingtonpost.com.au/2016/07/20/we-talk-to-a-neuroscientistabout-love-at-first-sight/ - “Scent and Attraction: Love at First Whiff?” by eHarmony Staff, eH Advice, eHarmony http://www.eharmony.com/dating-advice/dating/scent-and-attraction-love-at-first-whiff/#.WAt7gPkrLDd - “The Pheromone Revolution – Sexual Attractants and Their Effects on Sex, Confidence and Health,” by John Morgenthaler, Smart Publications http://www.smart-publications.com/articles/the-pheromone-revolution-sexual-attractants-and-their-effects-on-sex

Live Well. Age Well.

Scientists study it, theologians preach about it, songwriters write happy and heartbreaking songs about it—LOVE. There’s true love, tough love, puppy love, and the Greeks took it a step further, with six different words for love. Philautia is love of self; Philia is deep friendship; Ludus is playful love; Pragma is longstanding love, Eros is sexual love; Agape is love for everyone.

Healthy Living has chosen to explore five different types of relationships that involve love this month. These relationships are all special and all are a key to making life better— couples, parental, siblings, longtime friendship, and pets. Love is intangible, but H. Jackson Brown, Jr. says, “Sometimes the heart sees what is invisible to the eye.”

WRITERS: JAMES COMBS, LEIGH NEELY, THERESA CAMPBELL, DEBBI KIDDY

COUPLES

AGELESS LOVE

WRITER: THERESA CAMPBELL PHOTO: FRED LOPEZ

Retired Methodist minister John Annas was a 103-year-old widower when he and Lenore Bayus, then 84, quietly eloped on Dec. 17, 2007, after family and friends told them getting married at their age was a silly idea.

The lovebirds chose to follow their hearts.

They met at Lake Port Square in Leesburg where they talked about God, Abraham Lincoln, and their love for poetry and intellectual books.

John loved wooing his bride, a retired librarian, by reciting a Robert Browning poem from memory: “Grow old along with me! The best is yet to be, the last of life, for which the first was made. Our times are in his hand who saith, ‘A whole I planned, youth shows by half; Trust God: See all, nor be afraid!”

“This was definitely God’s leading,” John said in 2010 of marrying Lenore at Morrison United Methodist Church. “I have discovered somebody who makes my half a whole. I’ve never been happier than I am now. I have a wonderful companionship with Lenore [Bayus] Annas, a woman who makes me smile, laugh, and she makes my heart sing.”

He made daily trips to visit Lenore when she was hospitalized

and undergoing rehabilitation in early 2013. Wheeling from his assistedliving room, John would go down the hall to where she was in rehabilitation and give her a kiss each morning and wish her a goodnight every evening.

They were married for 5½ years before John passed away April 7, 2013. He was 108.

“We were very happy and had a good marriage, and I don’t remember any problems at all. We got along very well; we just seemed to click,” Lenore, now 93, says from her assisted-living room at Lake Port Square, where photos of her and John fill the walls.

“My friends thought I was crazy to marry John because he was a lot older,” says Lenore. “I don’t know what their problem was, but we didn’t have a problem with it…I think it was true love and the right thing.”

Lenore believes she and John were proof that love doesn’t stop as one ages. She also believes couples can make a relationship work by listening, communicating, and being there for each other, via teamwork.

In a Psychology Today survey administered to 21,501 couples, researchers found listening, flexibility, and teamwork were crucial compatibilities for couples to make their relationships work.

The researchers compared the answers of the happiest couples to the unhappiest, and they found that the differences between their answers to a few key questions revealed a lot about what it really takes to make love work.

The Psychology Today report says by willing to be rational about love, couples can learn from others’ experiences—and perhaps find and maintain a true love long after the initial chemistry fades.

Couples’ survey results:

“My partner is a very good listener.”

“My partner does not understand how I feel.”

We have a good balance of leisure time spent together and separately.”

“We find it easy to think of things to do together.”

“I am very satisfied with how we talk to each other.”

“We are creative in how we handle our differences.”

“Making financial decisions is not difficult.”

“Our sexual relationship is satisfying and fulfilling.”

“We are both equally willing to make adjustments in the relationship.”

“I can share feelings and ideas with my partner during disagreements.”

“My partner understands my opinions and ideas.”

Percentage of unhappy couples who agree

Percentage of happy couples who agree

“We were very happy and had a good marriage, and I don’t remember any problems at all. We got along very well; we just seemed to click,”

— LENORE (BAYUS) ANNAS

PARENTS

THE CIRCLE OF LOVE

WRITER: JAMES COMBS

The first meaningful bond and relationship a child forms is with parents.

The baby cries. The parent cuddles. The baby smiles. The parent smiles back. The baby makes funny noises. The parent imitates those noises.

Back and forth, countless times throughout the day, that bond is strengthened.

And in the case of Leesburg resident Linda Watts, the child-parent bond is one that has lasted a lifetime.

Her mother, Ouida Kenney, is a 95-year-old resident of Umatilla who lives in the same home she purchased in 1960. Linda has openly embraced life’s inevitable role reversal: she is now the parent and her mother is the child.

Each week, Linda drives to her mother’s home and assists with grocery shopping, organizes her medication, completes household chores, and prepares weekly meals.

For Linda, being a caregiver is not taxing or arduous. It’s all about spending valuable time with her mother. And the time they have together is a constant reminder of their indestructible bond.

“Every time I leave she gives me a hug and kiss and thanks me for everything I do for her,” Linda says. “I tell her, ‘I will always be there for you no matter what.’”

Linda’s time is precious. A retired teacher, she serves as director of two nonprofit organizations—Florida’s Hometown USA Program and the Miss Leesburg Scholarship program. She assumes the daunting tasks of organizing several fundraisers throughout the year and coordinating

volunteer opportunities for the young women in her program.

Still, her mother takes a backseat to nobody.

“No matter how busy I get, my mom always comes first,” Linda says. “However, I don’t do this alone. My sister, Lois Wetz, and brother, Greg Kenney, also help with doctor’s appointments and running errands.”

For Linda, it’s the least she could do for the person who once fed and clothed her, helped her with homework, and shaped her into the person she is today.

As a girl growing up in Umatilla, Linda admired her mother’s strength and resiliency. Ouida raised four children by herself. Her first husband died in an accident in 1946, and 12 years later her second husband succumbed to a heart attack.

Ouida proudly assumed the roles of housewife, breadwinner, mother, and family head. She worked as a cafeteria worker and custodian at Umatilla Elementary School.

“She worked at the school because she wanted to spend as much time as possible with us. She would get off work when we got off school. We never had to go do daycare or needed a babysitter. Because she was a cafeteria worker, the school allowed her to bring leftover food home so we could have it for dinner.”

The family was not wealthy, but Ouida always managed to provide. She used her sewing skills to make her children Halloween costumes and Easter dresses. And she always managed to stash a little extra money away when birthdays rolled around.

In fact, Linda’s 13th birthday is one she’ll never forget.

“My mom bought me a record player,” Linda fondly recalls. “She knew I really wanted one and worked hard to buy it for me. That’s one of the special memories about my mom that always stands out in my mind.”

When Linda needed money to attend her senior class trip to Washington D.C., Ouida held yard sales on the weekend.

“She even went on the trip as a chaperone. My mom was always involved in my life. She has taught me how to be strong, independent, and caring. She raised me to help others and that’s the only way of life I know.”

That caring spirit may explain why Ouida is still going strong at 95. She attends bible study, Sunday school, and worship services at First Baptist Church of Umatilla twice a week. At home, she solves word puzzles, reads Christian-inspired novels, and without fail, sends birthday cards to family members and friends.

“I know mom is not going to live forever, but in my mind her life is never going to end because she has always been there for me,” Linda says. “I love my mom so much, and I feel fortunate our relationship has been so strong all these years.”

“I know mom is not going to live forever, but in my mind her life is never going to end because she has always been there for me,”

— LINDA WATTS

SIBLINGS

I’M THE BEST! I WAS HERE FIRST!

STORY: LEIGH NEELY PHOTO: FRED LOPEZ

Most siblings fight. However, if an outsider goes after one of them, you can bet they’ll band together and turn on the outsider. The relationships between siblings is different from any relationship you’ll form with another person.

The children of Steve and Debbie Munz are all busy with various individual interests, but they manage to do things together whenever they can.

Lane is 20 and attends college at Webber International University in Lake Wales. Away from home most of the week, he’s still a good sibling when in town. “Love means having to take my sister her lunch every day when I’m home from school,” Lane says.

It seems his sister Abbie, 17, a student at The Villages High School, loves Chick-Fil-A. When Lane’s not in town, she has a lot of other family members, friends’ mothers, and grandmothers who sub for him.

He takes his responsibilities as older brother very seriously. “I feel I need to keep them out of trouble,” he says. “They usually argue, and I try to separate them. I end up getting in trouble.”

Gralynn, 12, is a student at The Villages Charter School, and, typical of the oldest child, Lane believes his little sister gets in less trouble for doing the same things he did.

“I feel like I was the experimental child. They figured out what to do right with me,” he says.

All three children love animals—their two dogs watched and monitored everything during the interview—and there’s a deer herd on the property. Lane, Abbie, and Gralynn all help with the animals, which are raised here to restock wildlife preserves.

Lane goes on to say there’s no such thing as down time when you’re raising animals. “I remember one night it was raining hard, and a tree fell down. Me and my dad and our manager had to go out and saw branches off the tree and fix the fence,” Lane says.

When asked about some of their favorite memories, all but one story involved travel. It seems Abbie was the victim of the classic “you’re adopted” prank that siblings often pull.

“It was her 13th or 14th birthday,” Gralynn says, “and we decorated her room.”

“I came home from dance, and my entire room was covered with streamers and balloons,” Abbie says.

“They’re always telling me I’m adopted, so I decided to let her celebrate ‘Happy Adoption’ day,” Gralynn says.

The Munz children say the travel stories are their favorites because they get to spend so much time together.

Lane recalls the family’s trip to New York City for his graduation. “It was great having the family there. We went exploring, walked everywhere, and rode the subway. We saw ‘The Lion King,’ which was amazing. That was my favorite movie when I was little,” he says.

“He kept saying he wanted to meet a celebrity,” Abbie adds. “And finally, we met Kevin Hart at the airport when we were on our way home.”

Gralynn’s favorite trip was to The Keys, where she got to ride a jet ski, and Abbie recalled a trip to San Francisco, where her siblings fell asleep as soon as the plane took off. She was the only one awake when the pilot announced they had to return to Orlando because there was a problem with the plane. “I was scared when we were landing,” she says. “And they were asleep.”

Is there competition? Always, the three siblings admit.

“They do pageants, and when one wins and the other one doesn’t, it’s not a happy day in our house,” Lane says.

“I’m the best basketball player,” Abbie adds with a smile.

“She means she didn’t get an injury,” Gralynn says.

“Getting an injury doesn’t mean you’re a bad player,” Lane reminds her.

They also compete when they go fishing together—who catches the first one, the biggest one, and the most fish.

All three of the kids have been “Sumter County Royalty.” Lane was Tiny Mr. Sumter County, and Abbie is 2016 Teen Miss Sumter County, and Gralynn was Sumter County Princess in 2014.

Steve and Debbie Munz are proud parents, and with three good reasons.

Love means having to take my sister her lunch every day when I’m home from school.

— LANE MUNZ

FRIENDS

FOREVER FRIENDS

WRITER: DEBBI KIDDY

Celebrity BFFs, like Oprah Winfrey and Gayle King and Ben Affleck and Matt Damon, are known for their longevity, as well as their star power. Most would agree that long-term friendships are healthy, yet most adults also admit they have very few friendships that have stood the test of time.

Studies confirm what many already know—spending time with long-term friends is not only fun, but also improves your health. Irene Levine, Ph.D., a psychologist and creator of “The Friendship Blog,” says one reason lifelong friendships are so appealing is your friend not only knows who you are today, but knows who you were. Communication flows easier when there is a positive history and shared memories.

Martha Clarke, 81, of Eustis, has known her friend, JoAnn Robertson, since they were five-year-olds. They went to the same school from kindergarten to high school and through Elon College High School in North Carolina.

“When we were girls, one of the things we loved to do was to climb the humongous—at least to us—tree that grew in JoAnn’s yard. We’d climb as high as we could and then swing from one limb to another. We didn’t worry about falling,” says Martha. “As we got older, we would get together and sew, or just take a walk and talk.”

In an article by Catherine Pearson, “5 Secrets of People with Lifelong Friends,” she says other important aspects

of lasting friendships are keeping expectations realistic, being adaptable, appreciating for the uniqueness of the relationship, and offering forgiveness when needed.

Maintaining that priceless relationship gets more difficult as circumstances such as moving away, divorce, or even disagreements come into play.

Asked whether or not Martha and JoAnn ever had major disagreements, Martha says, “Sure, we had disagreements over the years. But if you love someone, you can forgive them, forget, and go on.”

Martha’s view is in line with Lisa Firestone, psychology expert on relationships and author, who wrote an online article, “Forgiveness: The Secret to a Healthy Relationship.” Lisa believes to truly enjoy a lasting friendship, friends should “grow their ability to forgive.”

“One of the things we loved to do was to climb the humongous—at least to us—tree that grew in JoAnn’s yard. We would climb as high as we could and then swing from one limb to another. We didn’t worry about falling,”

— MARTHA CLARKE

PETS: THEY’RE PAWESOME!

WRITER: JAMES COMBS

Owning a pet is one of life’s greatest loves. Pets provide companionship, help everyday worries melt away, and serve as instant mood-boosters. While they depend on us for basic needs, we equally depend on them to fill our hearts with warmth.

In past issues of Healthy Living, we delved extensively into the health benefits of owning a pet and allowed pet owners to tell us why their pet brings so much joy and love into their lives.

With this article, we’re doing something a little different.

We posed the following question to several Lake County residents:

“If we asked your pet how you treat him/her, what would your pet say?”

Here’s how they answered.

“My mommy treats me like a child. She is strict on my diet, and she keeps me off the countertops. However, she also encourages lots of play and snuggles. My mommy works very hard during the day as a teacher and sometimes doesn’t give me enough attention in the early-morning hours because she is tired and needs to sleep. Also, I wish she would let me wander outside sometimes, but going outside is an absolute no-no.”

“I love to ride on your shoulder, but sometimes you leave me in my cage too long.”

—Leesburg resident Tom Grizzard, owner of Chico, a 12-year-old green wing macaw.

“My name is Diesel and I’m a 6-yearold English Bulldog. I love my daddy, Stan Gause of Stan’s Premium Cars. He is my best friend. I am living a charmed life. He throws me the Frisbee, plays tug-of-war, and loves on me at every turn. But, despite shedding my hair, farting all the time, and constant loud snoring, Stan still loves me. Sometimes I chew things I’m not supposed to, eat things that aren’t mine, and slobber too much, but Stan still loves me. Sometimes when I go poo, I take too long, and when I go pee, I kill the grass, but Stan still loves me. Sometimes my butt itches and I spin on the floor, I sleep on furniture I’m not supposed to, and I bark at things that he can’t see, but Stan still loves me. Sometimes I make a mess of my food, drink too much water, and poop in the back of his Mercedes, but Stan still loves me. So, despite my quirks and bad habits, that is why I love my dad Stan because he is my very best friend.”

—Silver Lake resident Stan Gause, owner of Diesel, a 6-year-old English bulldog.

“My mommy and daddy spoil me. Sometimes, I get to go to the studio and hang out all day. After that, I know we will head to the park then I might get a few bites of a sandwich. Sometimes I get chicken from Oakwood and that is my favorite. I let them know how much I appreciate it by rolling around on my back…yum, yum! Daddy and I always spend time in the yard, we play ball, and walk around. Mommy joins us to sit and watch sunsets. When daddy mows or works in the yard, I always hang around and make sure he is OK. In the evenings, mommy and daddy spend time hanging out in my home, which is the garage. But it’s not just any garage. I’ve got a doggie door, carpet, my plush bed, paddle fan, and even an air conditioning vent. It’s a great life!”

—Mount Dora resident Katie Lewis, owner of Neddo, a 7-year-old black shorthaired cat.

—Leesburg resident Myron Leggett, owner of Lexie, a 12-year-old golden retriever.

That place right now is The Heart of the Villages. Our physicians and medical professionals have been treating Central Floridians for years with a level of exemplary cardio care that comes straight from the heart. We’re in a new location now, but our hearts are where they’ve always been—with you and the health of your family.

New location! The Oaks Professional Center, 8575 NE 138th Lane Call today for a consultation at 352.674.2080 heartofthevillages.com

Life sounds sweeter when your the right place.

HEARTMATES

WRITER: JAMES COMBS PHOTO: FRED LOPEZ

The room hums with serious conversations, gracious laughter, and the faint ticking of mechanical heart valves. Hugs and smiles abound among this group of strangers who share a sense of kinship. They swap stories about undergoing open-heart surgery, cardiac rehabilitation, and pacemaker placement.

Those in the room live with heart disease. Some are living miracles who were brought back to life.

Nope, these are not elderly men with faulty tickers. Instead, it’s the scene that typically plays out when members of WomenHeart gather for monthly meetings. This courageous group of women raises awareness about cardiovascular disease, which is a serious health issue for females that is often misunderstood and misdiagnosed.

Sue Prince, 61, was a natural candidate to spearhead The Villages chapter of WomenHeart, a national organization that promotes women’s heart health through advocacy, education, and patient support.

Prince has endured three heart attacks in the past decade but refused to become a cardiac cripple. Today, she regularly engages in yoga, walks one mile daily, and performs in a local dance company.

“I am one of the lucky ones,” she says. “I survived not only one heart attack but three. I felt like it’s my duty to help other women going through the same ordeal.”

After forming WomenHeart in The Villages two years ago, she soon realized many women are in the same boat. Membership has skyrocketed to 80 members, making this chapter one of the largest in the country and serving as a grim reminder of how prevalent cardiovascular disease is among women.

They meet on the third Wednesday of every month inside the Sharon Morse Medical Building from 3:30-4:30 p.m. The peer-to-peer group provides support to local female cardiac patients—those who have had bypass surgery, stent placement, pacemaker placement, or manage heart disease with medication.

Ultimately, the goal is to empower each member.

Sometimes that’s accomplished through educational sessions with guest speakers such as pharmacists, yoga instructors, and dietitians. Other times, it’s accomplished by simply lending a listening ear.

“We allow members to share their stories,” says Prince, a 2007 graduate of WomenHeart’s Science and Leadership Symposium held at Mayo Clinic in Minnesota.“It’s important for women with heart disease to express their feelings.”

That need to talk—and more importantly, learn—is vital to slowing the rate of heart disease for women in the United States.

Heart disease kills more women than all forms of cancer combined. In fact, one in every three American women dies from heart disease or stroke, according to the American Heart Association (AHA). Breast cancer, long believed to be a woman’s biggest health threat, kills only one in 31 American women each year.

However, there is a sharp contrast between perception and reality. The mere mention of heart disease typically conjures the image of an elderly man clutching his chest and dropping to the ground. Even women do not always take the threat of heart disease seriously. A 2003 AHA study of 1,000 women found that only 13 percent believed their greatest health threat was heart disease or stroke.

To compound problems, women with heart disease are not diagnosed or treated as aggressively as men, according to a study conducted by the Agency for Healthcare Research and Quality.

That is likely because symptoms are strikingly different between the sexes.

“It’s common for doctors to associate heart attacks with crushing chest pain,” says Dr. Joseph Sahab, a cardiologist with Florida Heart and Multi-Specialty Group in Leesburg. “In many cases, women who have heart disease do not feel chest pain and therefore are misdiagnosed.

Moreover, when women do feel chest pain, it oftentimes is not related to the heart. So when a woman visits a doctor’s office, the doctor may assume the pain stems from something else.”

Holly Hollingsworth, who joined WomenHeart two years ago, has experienced three near heart attacks since 2011. Each came with different symptoms. The first time she felt shortness of breath, the second time she experienced upper left arm pain, and the third time she suffered from a sharp pain in the center of her back.

“During one of our WomenHeart meetings, we asked several women what their symptoms were,” says Hollingsworth, a resident of The Villages. “Not one of them had the same symptom. That’s why it can be confusing for doctors to diagnose heart disease in women. Many doctors attribute the symptoms to exhaustion, anxiety, or even menopause.”

Helping women understand these symptomatic differences and teaching them to seek prompt treatment can vastly improve outcomes. That is one reason why Hollingsworth, who will assume Prince’s role of community support coordinator in 2017, plans to extend the WomenHeart meetings by 30 minutes.

“Women need to be equipped with the necessary knowledge about heart disease so they can be advocates for themselves. They need to learn how to listen to their bodies. The mental, physical, and emotional toll heart disease has on women is very real. I want members of our chapter to have enough time to talk about their fears and concerns and ask pertinent questions relating to their health.”

She will also introduce 15-minute training modules to teach members about proper nutrition and exercise and how to cope with fear and depression.

“My main focus is to reach women who have heart disease, women who are at risk for heart disease, and women who are curious to learn more about

heart disease. I want them to know there’s a group of women who care about their concerns and feelings. They can join us, learn from other members, receive unyielding support, and form meaningful friendships.”

That camaraderie with others who are going through the same adversity is invaluable.

“I get lots of hugs,” Prince says. “That is one of the best things about being part of this group.”

WomenHeart is open to all local females. For more information about WomenHeart, call Prince at 240.271.9292 or Hollingsworth at 770.596.7734.

Dr. Joseph Sahab, a local cardiologist, answers questions pertaining to women and cardiovascular disease.

Q: What ages are women at greatest risk for heart disease?

A: After menopause, a woman’s risk is the same as a man’s risk because their estrogen levels are now lower. Estrogen helps prevent plaque formation.

Q: What specific symptoms do women experience prior to an actual heart attack?

A: One week before the heart attack, they may feel shortness of breath, fatigue, insomnia, dizziness, and indigestion. They may also have cold sweats and cold, clammy hands.

Q: What are the risk factors for women developing cardiovascular disease?

A: They are essentially the same for women as for men—smoking, high blood pressure, high cholesterol, obesity, and a family history of heart disease.

Q: How does hormone replacement therapy affect a woman’s heart?

A: According to recent studies, it does not reduce the incidence of cardiovascular disease or increase the risk.

Vaginal dryness putting

TAKING HEALTH TO HEART

According to the American Heart Association, cardiovascular disease kills more Americans than the next five leading causes of death combined.

That’s why it is comforting to know Cardiovascular Associates is a short drive away. The practice offers the most comprehensive diagnostic, interventional and therapeutic patient care and services possible. Never content to rest on its laurels, Cardiovascular Associates always looks for ways to provide the highest quality of care to patients.

The recent addition of Dr. Will Barsoum has allowed them to do just that.

Dr. Barsoum, who joined Cardiovascular Associates in January 2017, blends cutting-edge procedures and technology with personal, patient-centered care.

Simply put, he prides himself on spending the necessary time to get to know patients as people and help them understand their condition. This patient-centered approach ultimately leads to accurate diagnoses and more effective treatment plans.

“It’s great to be part of the team at Cardiovascular Associates,” he said. “I share the philosophy of the other doctors in taking care of patients to the best of our ability. We take a personal interest in the care and well-being of our patients, and that tends to result in excellent outcomes.”

Dr. Barsoum attended medical school at St. George’s University

School of Medicine in Grenada and completed a residency and two fellowships at Seton Hall University in New Jersey. He brings a unique skill set to Cardiovascular Associates and is experienced in treating peripheral vascular disease and pulmonary embolism.

“For me, it’s a major milestone whenever I can improve a patient’s quality of life and increase their longevity.”

He previously practiced in Lake County for more than two years before moving to Orlando.

“I’m happy to be returning to the area. This is where I want to raise my family. We have the best of both worlds. There is

but you don’t have to look far for shopping and entertainment.”

Osprey Lodge’s trademark Heart felt CONNECTIONS memory care program focuses on the unique abilities that remain to each resident, both cognitive and physical. Residents are assessed and life histories are recorded that allow us to see each person for the individual he or she is. We get to know each person we have the privilege of caring for. We understand who they are now; more importantly, we learn about their lives before memory loss brought them to our doors. With detailed knowledge of our residents at our fingertips and in our hearts, we develop truly personalized care plans, incorporating favorite hobbies and pastimes into activities, and favorite foods into menus. Our caring staff, who have received specialized training in memory care, make each resident’s life as meaningful, fulfilling and joyful as possible!

Heart felt CONNECTIONS

For those seniors and their families living with a memory impairing disease.

“It’s all about understanding and treasuring what remains as far more important than what is lost, and celebrating life in and of itself.”

— Pat Spence, Life Care Services

Our Caregivers Support Group, sponsored by The Alzheimer’s Family Organization, meets the second Tuesday of every month at 6pm. Open to all, it’s a safe place for family caregivers to talk and learn with others in the same situation. For details, or for more information about our Heart felt CONNECTIONS memory care program, please call or visit Osprey Lodge. Ask for Ruth Cantillon, director of sales & community relations.

Alana Kidd, Activities Director & Memory Care Specialist

Maureen Murphy, R.N., Director of Memory Care

‘STAND UP TO STAND OUT’ IMPACTS LAKE

WRITER: THERESA CAMPBELL PHOTO: FRED LOPEZ

AUmatilla mother of three never imagined when she and a friend started a Facebook group—Stand Up to Stand Out—that it would branch out to 1,664 (and growing) members devoted to performing random acts of kindness to help their Lake County neighbors in need.

“I am absolutely amazed; I have seen a lot of friendships built over this,” says Stacie Richter, 35, the site administrator, who often works behind the scenes several hours a day on the page.

Thanks to the popularity of social media, her page allows people to network by expressing their interest or need for certain items, or post free things they want to give away to a good home. More than 300 new people joined in December alone.

Baby items, men’s trousers, and toys were recent items posted as being available on Facebook—generating donors and recipients to send private messages of public places to meet to make exchanges.

“It’s like when people meet, they are not just swapping items. They’re connecting. I am most proud of the fact that when we started this page, we wanted to build friendships in the community,” Stacie says.

She started the page in September 2015 with her friend Brittany Curry Cox.

“We wanted people to feel that somebody cared,” Stacie says. “Our group isn’t just about giving people things for free; ours is about helping people in need when they need it.”

The group’s roots initially began when Stacie “adopted” families to help during the Christmas season a few years ago. A friend also joined in to help.

“Then we had this idea of why don’t we try to get some more of our friends involved?” Stacie recalls. Some 400 friends immediately joined before the page was expanded into a community project.

In 2015, the Facebook group helped 25 families and 79 children total in a Holiday Adoption Event. Needy families were validated and each child was listed with his or her clothing size, shoe size, and gift ideas for toys and other interests.

The number of families served in the Holiday Adoption Event more than doubled in the 2016 Christmas season.

“It’s a lot of fun for all of the volunteers,” says Stacie. “It is always exciting for them because a lot of the volunteers have adopted a child so they are getting involved both ways, and some of the families who receive gifts volunteer because it is their way of giving back.”

Stacie was deeply touched when the Lake County Explorers program chose to be active in the 2016 Christmas project. She posted on Facebook in December about their involvement:

“With the help of their leading officers they have decided to come together as a group and enjoy each other’s company while doing some holiday shopping for new toys to donate to help local families in need. We want to give them a big thank you for inviting us out to speak to their young leaders and we look forward to inspiring them to become a great part of our growing communities! If you know one of the Explorers personally, please tell them thank you.”

She’s also thankful for the people who value her efforts and applaud Stand Up to Stand Out.

“I do appreciate it when people are like, ‘You amaze me, Stacie!’ I don’t need to hear it, but it feels good when I do,” she says.

As she continually becomes aware and researches the needs that are brought to the group’s attention, Stacie posts requests on the Facebook page to see if anyone wishes to help.

She loves seeing people respond.

“There is always someone willing to help,” she says.

Her group has come to the aid of domestic violence victims and helped several people rebuild their lives following damaging house fires.

“We have a lot of contacts,” Stacie says, adding one company installed new drywall in a burnt home, and many of her Facebook friends came through with new rugs, curtains, kitchenware, furniture, and clothes.

She cherishes getting to meet Stand Up to Stand Out donors at the public functions; many are other parents without a lot of money, but they want to help others who are struggling with job losses, health woes, or daily challenges.

“I talk to these people on Facebook all the time, but when I actually collect the donations from them and I get to meet them in person, and hug them, and tell them it’s going

to be OK and to keep your head up, it’s really fun and it excites me,” Stacie says.

Stand Up to Stand Out also hosts a free clothing giveaway twice a year, and the next one will be in the spring. Stand Up to Stand Out members will be encouraged to clean out their closets of clothes they no longer want. The items will be stored in a storage unit and then taken to a public park for distribution. The clothing event will be advertised at food banks and local schools.

“We invite anybody in need to come out and take whatever they need. There is no limit,” says Stacie, who’s pleased her son Skyler, 5, and daughters Chloe, 10, and Delaney, 13 are also involved in Stand Up to Stand Out.

Reflecting on her own youth, Stacie says she lived pretty comfortably while growing up.

“My parents worked very hard for what we had,” she says. Her father owned his own small business; her mom was in the banking field.

“I don’t ever remember struggling, but I look back sometimes and we ate Ramen noodles a lot, and maybe we didn’t have enough food that day,” she says.

However, Stacie hasn’t forgotten the challenging times as a single

mother during the first year of her oldest child’s life.

For several months she had three jobs while Delaney was in daycare. The best job was at a dentist office, yet she felt horrible to miss work when her daughter wasn’t well.

“Christmas came and the women in the office knew that I was struggling,” Stacie says, recalling the women surprised her with a $100 Walmart gift card and a $50 Publix gift card.

Another year Stacie recalled she was battling pneumonia. She went to pay her car payment and a gentleman at Braswell Auto in Eustis felt so bad that she was so sick and worried about Christmas.

“He handed me my entire car payment back. He told me to go get Christmas for my child,” she says.

Those random acts of kindness touched her.

“I’m paying it back and I’m paying it forward,” Stacie says. “I just want to encourage people to do what is right and to feel good. There is no financial payment for this. My payment for this is feeling good and seeing other people happy.”

For information, visit the Stand Up to Stand Out Facebook page or email staciemobacie@aol.com.

The focus of our practice is to provide the very best surgical care available to patients. We are committed to achieving this goal through continuing education and training in the most current robotic and laparoscopic techniques. Our practice treats our patients, nurses and staff like family. It is our belief that all patients deserve the best medical care available. We provide the most advanced, compassionate surgical care that has helped thousands live longer, healthier, happier lives.

Our website, www.MidFloridaSurgical.com provides information regarding each of our surgeons.

Mid-Florida Surgical Associates has been serving Lake, Sumter, and West Orange Counties since 1991.

IF YOU ARE EXPERIENCING A FEW OF THE STRESS CHARACTERISTICS LISTED, CHANCES ARE YOUR LEVEL OF STRESS IS EXCESSIVE:

• Anger

• Anxiety

• Heart palpitations

THE TRUTH

ABOUT STRESS AND YOUR HEART

No matter what the source of your stress may be, too much of it can increase your risk of heart disease.

Chronic stress can result in unhealthy habits that increase your risk of heart disease. Some examples are: smoking, sedentary lifestyle, overuse of alcohol, and poor eating habits.

How stress affect your heart?

elevated, and you may develop hypertension. Stress hormones can damage blood vessels by altering their flexibility and making them more vulnerable to plaque disruption.

• Back pain

• Chest tightness

• Headaches

• Inability to relax at night

• Irritable bowel syndrome

• Inability to concentrate

• Increase in blood pressure

• Loss of sexual desire

Well, it starts with the autonomic nervous system, an unconscious part of the nervous system that has two branches—the sympathetic and parasympathetic. These branches work together to control some of the involuntary activities of the body, producing chemicals that direct those activities. The sympathetic branch normally releases adrenaline. During stressful moments, this is produced in excess, which causes your heart rate and blood pressure to soar and a stimulation of platelets (blood clotting cells). Most people have felt palpitation, a strong heart beat or a racing pulse at times, which indicate and increase in our blood pressure. When stress continues without letting up over a long period of time, your blood pressure stays

Because every person responds to life’s stressors differently, our emotions profoundly influence our hormonal production. The kind of personality we have affects how our body and its internal system response. You can change your response. Identify when, where and why you get angry and then take steps to recognize and deal with your anger before it builds up. Taking time for yourself should become your new priority as you start on our hearthealthy way of life.

FOR

Stress simply is not taken seriously enough as a health threat.

“Humans love sex, we need sex, it’s how we connect, it reminds us we’re alive, it’s the third most basic human need, after food and good movie popcorn.”

— Billy Crystal

11 FANTASTIC HEALTH BENEFITS OF HAVING REGULAR SEX

WRITER: DR. E. C. GORDON

Many people still feel a little embarrassed or awkward about their sexual desires, but there are scientifically sound reasons to believe that sex is extremely good for your body. Read on to discover 11 surprising and important ways regularly making love can boost your physical and mental health.

1) SEX IS GOOD FOR YOUR HEART.

Having regular sex reduces your risk of having a heart attack. One group of researchers found that men who had sex at least twice a week were a staggering 50 percent less likely to have a deadly heart attack than were their more sexually restrained peers. In addition, for older couples the connection between having sex and having a stroke is mythical. Studies show there is no apparent link between frequent sex and suffering strokes. Finally, sex increases estrogen production in women, which is thought to protect your cardiovascular system against the development of heart disease.

2) SEX MIGHT HELP YOU LIVE A LONGER LIFE.

There is evidence that regular sex is linked to longevity. Every time you have an orgasm, this leads to the release of a hormone called DHEA. Some scientists believe this increase in DHEA can extend your lifespan because DHEA is capable of improving resistance to disease, repairing damaged tissue, maintaining the central nervous system, and boosting mood. Further, a study at Duke University found older women who were happy with their sex lives tended to live seven or eight years longer than women who claimed to be indifferent to (or unsatisfied by) sex.

3) REGULAR SEX LOWERS YOUR RISK OF DEVELOPING PROSTATE CANCER.

If you are a man, you have an extra incentive to have regular sex well into old age. Several scientific studies show that men who orgasm more frequently (i.e. at least five times a week) are around a third less likely to end up suffering from prostate cancer in later life. It is thought this might be because ejaculating rids the body of some of the dangerous products that end up leading to cancer.

4) REGULAR SEX LEADS TO GREATER LEVELS OF INTIMACY BETWEEN PARTNERS.

Having sex prompts your body to release a hormone called oxytocin, especially if your sex session involves at least one orgasm. Oxytocin is sometimes called the ‘cuddle hormone’ or the ‘love hormone’ because it makes you feel affectionate, safe, and trusting. Research shows greater levels of physical intimacy between you and your partner lead to greater oxytocin production, and this in turn leads to a more intense and long-lasting bond.

5) SEX CAN HELP YOU TO LOOK YOUNGER FOR LONGER.

One intriguing study performed in Scotland showed that people who have regular sex looked four to seven years younger than they were. This study involved a

group of judges assessing the ages of 3,500 different people in photographs, and it turned out the people who were judged to be the youngest participants were also the ones with the most active sex lives. This is as yet a rather difficult result to explain, but one hypothesis is that the human growth hormone secreted in response to sex helps to improve muscle tone, and toned people tend to look younger.

6) REGULAR SEX LEADS TO A STRONGER IMMUNE SYSTEM.

Studies indicate that men and women who have sex at least twice a week have higher levels of immunoglobulin A in their bodies. This is an antibody that plays a role in how likely you are to catch colds and other viral or bacterial infections. One research project conducted at a university in Pennsylvania revealed people who have sex twice or more each week are boosting their immune systems by as much as 30 percent.

7) SEX CAN HELP YOU TO STAY SLIM.

An average session of sex (lasting about half an hour) will burn at least 80 calories, and the benefits of this excellent form of cardiovascular exercise can add up over time. For example, if you have sex at least twice a week then your sex life will burn at least 1,280 calories

in a month. If you have extremely frequent, enthusiastic or athletic sex, then you will, of course, burn even more.

8) SEX HELPS KEEP MENSTRUAL PERIODS REGULAR

Scientists at Stanford University learned that women who have sex at least once or twice a week have more regular (and therefore more easily predictable) menstrual cycles in comparison to women who only have sex a couple of times each month.

9) SEX IS A NATURAL PAINKILLER.

The aforementioned hormone oxytocin is accompanied by a boost in endorphins when you have sex. As a result of these two chemicals, you feel less pain after making love. Some people claim to find orgasms especially helpful when it comes to relieving headaches and premenstrual cramps. This anecdotal evidence is supported by a recent study in which participants who recently inhaled oxytocin reported less pain after having their finger pricked by a needle.

10) SEX MAKES YOU FEEL BETTER ABOUT YOURSELF.

One important psychological benefit of sex is that it improves self-esteem and boosts confidence levels. There are plausible reasons why this might be the case. For example, feeling desired by someone makes you feel

more attractive, performing well in bed usually leads to compliments that help you to feel confident about your sexual prowess, and knowing your partner wants you even though they know exactly what you look like naked can improve your body image.

11) SEX REDUCES STRESS LEVELS.

Sex doesn’t just make people feel more emotionally relaxed. It also lowers physical signs of stress such as high blood pressure, and this impact on blood pressure can be quite significant. One study conducted on 46 adults found that men and women who regularly have sex experience less dramatic spikes in blood pressure when entering a stressful situation. Interestingly, this result applied specifically to intercourse. People who engaged in other forms of sexual activity did not exhibit the same lowered blood pressure.

If you have a high sex drive and an active sex life, feel happy rather than embarrassed! Sex is not only great fun but also extremely good for your body. If you go through a less stimulating spell with your partner, try your best to come up with new ideas to make things fresh and exciting again. If you continue to have plenty of sex well into your later years, your physical and emotional health will benefit greatly.

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MONITORING YOUR BLOOD?

NO PRESSURE.

WRITER: LIZ WILLIAMS

You probably have your blood pressure checked regularly by your doctor. However, it may change, and it’s advisable to check it often no matter how healthy you feel.

High blood pressure can lead to strokes, heart attacks, and other dangerous cardiovascular diseases, while low pressure causes dizziness and fainting. Both extremes can be reduced or raised to safe levels through monitoring and preventative measures. You don’t even need to visit the doctor for your checks unless you have reason to be concerned. Just buy a personal monitoring kit and check your levels. Here are some tips for doing this, and responding to results.

Choosing your blood pressure kit

Blood pressure monitors come in various guises and sizes, and a range of prices too. Peruse the online catalogs for the latest models. You can buy a light one to wear on your wrist and check before and after exercising, or a sturdier version to fasten around your upper arm. Some studies suggest that the upper-arm type gives more accurate readings. For an even fuller check, pick one with accompanying stethoscope. But a basic, low-cost monitor will suffice and can be purchased from any pharmacy, superstore, or online. The devices also give heart rate and pulse readings for you to compare before and after activity and from day to day. Many register the dates and times of your checks, and some give records and averages of previous readings. If your readings give cause for alarm, see your doctor immediately.

Normal blood pressure variations

You’ll find wide variations in your blood pressure readings through the day, and from day to day, due to influencing factors such as exercise, tension, energy levels, and meals. Overall, however, the readings should fall within the safe range, as specified in your kit’s accompanying handbook. You may see huge variations within a few minutes, especially if your mood, position, or activity level changes, so don’t be unduly alarmed at the odd extreme reading. For maximum accuracy, have a few minutes’ quiet time first and make sure you’re relaxed and comfortable before starting the procedure. Then follow the instructions carefully. A blood pressure test can’t be rushed.

Understanding your readings

You’ll find two readings on your monitor screen, one above the other. The upper figure represents the systolic, or amount of pressure in your arteries when the heart contracts, and should ideally lie between 90 and 120. The lower figure represents the diastolic, or pressure between heartbeats, which should average between 60 and 80.

When to see a doctor

If your readings repeatedly fall outside the safe zone, seek advice from your doctor, who will probably recommend a healthier lifestyle, including more exercise and relaxation and a high-fiber, low-fat diet. If you’re overweight, you’ll be advised to cut down your food intake to relieve the strain on your heart, and if you enjoy a daily tipple, you may need to cut down on that too. If you want to keep healthy, fit, and full of energy, take all those precautions anyway. Depending on the severity of your problem, you may also be prescribed tablets to keep blood pressure under control.

You don’t need to let the checks rule your life or cause you undue stress. (It’s just as important to look both ways before crossing the road, but you don’t lie awake at night worrying about traffic, do you?) Blood pressure problems may occur at any age, even with a healthy lifestyle, so for peace of mind, keep a check on yours at all times.

Are you ready to be ReNewed?

Tired of being told there's nothing wrong when you know you just don't feel like yourself? If common complaints such as fatigue, low sex drive, brain fog, weight gain and moodiness affect your day-to-day, then it is time to understand how to live your life ReNewed

Medical Director, Randy Fink, MD, and Pamela Cook, MSN, NP, invite you to optimize your health and increase your happiness at their newly opened, state of the art location in Lady Lake.

CROCKPOT CHICKEN SAUSAGE, PEPPERS AND ONIONS

It’s so nice to come home to a hot meal!

DIRECTIONS

1. Heat olive oil in pan and brown the sausage, set aside to cool.

2. Chop onion and peppers, add to pan, cook until softened, then add garlic. Cook for 1-2 minutes then add to crockpot. Once sausage is cooled, cut into 1-inch pieces and add to the crockpot.

3. Cook on low for five hours.

“My favorite thing to do is teach how to cook easy, healthy, budget-friendly meals with minimal ingredients!”

Jaime Alonso, certified health coach

I received my initial training and certification as a wellness coach at Spencer Institute. I then continued my training as a health coach from the Institute for Integrative Nutrition’s cutting-edge health coach training program. During my training, I studied more than100 dietary theories, practical lifestyle management techniques, and innovative coaching methods with some of the world’s top health and wellness experts. My teachers included Dr. Andrew Weil, director of The Arizona Center for Integrative Medicine; Dr. Deepak Chopra, leader in the field of mindbody medicine; Dr. David Katz, director of Yale University’s Prevention Research Center; Dr. Walter Willet, chair of nutrition at Harvard University; Geenan Roth, best-selling author and expert on emotional eating; and many other leading researchers and nutrition authorities.

My responsibility at TNT is to help you create a “sustainable” lifestyle change. Meeting you where you are in your journey and equipping you with practical tools to grow and learn new strategies; teaching you how to shop and meal plan; helping you create new ideas; and learning how to go out to eat are a few of the hands-on lessons you receive. I teach you how to live well for life!

A HEALTHY QUICK, AND, EASY-TO-MAKE MEAL THAT’S READY IN MINUTES

“Self-esteem is as important to our well-being as legs are to a table. It is essential for physical and mental health and for happiness.”

— Louise Hart

ADDICTED TO LOVE.

WRITER: ANNE HALIFAX

If like most other people, you’ve had a crush at some point, you know the giddy feeling of having your mind and mood all tangled up in thoughts of another person. Now imagine that feeling pervading all aspects of your life and becoming the only thing you’re able to focus on. This describes the phenomenon of limerence, a term coined by psychologist Dorothy Tennov in her 1979 book “Love and Limerence.” As strange as it sounds, limerence is a literal addiction to another person.

Limerence is far more intense than a crush. Much of the time, a crush is a seed from which limerence grows. As limerence develops, the affected person starts thinking more and more often, sometimes involuntarily, of the person they like. (The object of a limerent’s affection is usually called the limerent object, or LO, by psychologists.) Eventually, the LO becomes an all-consuming fixation.

The limerent person gets lost in fantasies numerous times every day and somehow finds a way to relate all their thoughts and actions to their LO. They may start acting in ways they think their LO would approve, even when they’re alone, or they may rearrange their schedule in hopes of “accidentally” running into their LO. The inability to stop thinking about the object of affection is one of the hallmarks of limerence.

Someone with a crush will probably seek some resolution eventually by asking the person they like on a date or telling them how they feel. For someone in the grip of limerence, the possibility of being rejected is too much to handle, so they avoid revealing their feelings.

Healthy love requires openness and communication, but limerence thrives on secrecy and ambiguity. Someone who’s experiencing limerence develops an uncanny talent for hyper-interpretation. They become extremely alert to everything their LO does and says, and analyze the smallest, most innocuous actions for signs the LO secretly returns their feelings.

When a person is experiencing limerence, they lose their emotional autonomy. Their mood is dependent on the LO’s behavior, and they can swing quickly between the height of elation and a state of despair, depending on how their LO acts toward them. Something as small as the LO making eye contact or smiling at them can give a limerent person a buzz of joy that lasts for days. Similarly, overblown feeling of despondence results if the limerent person perceives their LO is ignoring them or is interested in another person. If a limerent person can’t see their LO at all, they tend to become anxious and out of sorts. Some cases of limerence are so bad the limerent person contemplates suicide after being slighted. A limerent person can’t regulate their emotions. They usually feel either fantastic or terrible, and mood is dictated by the most recent interaction with the person on whom they fixate.

Needless to say, limerence is destructive to the person experiencing it. They may find themselves abnormally shy and awkward around their LO, or they may start engaging in stalker-like behaviors. This is something they would never condone in a clearer state of mind. Many people feel ashamed or embarrassed about their limerent behaviors, but at the same time are powerless to stop them. Limerence can also affect a person’s ability to function in day-to-day life. Their grades will drop, performance at work suffers, and responsibilities at home are ignored. If an affected person

has a partner or spouse already, limerence almost always damages the existing relationship due disengagement and emotional distance. In a limerent person’s life, everything takes a back seat to their compulsive thoughts and fantasies about the LO.

Limerence bears a strong resemblance to addiction because that’s exactly what it is. It’s not known exactly why limerence arises in some people and not in others. Some experts blame an overactive limbic system, others consider limerence a cousin of OCD because of the obsessive thoughts it causes, and still others argue that limerence stems from a deep feeling of inadequacy or a desire for acceptance, perhaps originating from emotional trauma in childhood.

Whatever the cause, one thing is known for sure: as far as your brain is concerned, love and attachment to other people truly can be an addiction. Studies show that the walking-on-air feeling of “falling in love” is the result of hormones and chemicals in the brain that produce feelings similar to the highs experienced by drug users. This is why many limerent people, despite knowing that their condition is negatively impacting their lives and causing them pain, don’t seek help or attempt to change. Despite all the destructive effects of limerence, they’re hooked on the rush they get from interacting with and thinking about their LO.

Limerence might look like love or a crush from the outside, but don’t make the mistake of confusing them. Limerence has a dark side due to its addictive nature. It might feel enjoyable for a while, but obsessing over another person and feeling totally emotionally dependent on them is not a healthy way to live. The good news is limerence doesn’t normally last forever. Because the brain cannot keep producing the chemicals that create the feeling of addictive love, the majority of cases of limerence go away by themselves within two to three years.

OPEN YOUR HEART TO BETTER MENTAL HEALTH

WRITER: BEE GREENE

Mental health affects heart health, both in terms of your risk of developing heart disease and your ability to get well after a heart attack. It should come as no surprise that depression often occurs in people who have a heart attack, but mental illness also doubles your risk of heart disease, according to research from the Canadian Community Health Survey.

Approximately 15 to 20 percent of people hospitalized with a heart attack develop major depression, and many others develop mild depression. Women are more likely to be depressed following a heart attack than men, and younger women are most likely to experience depression. It can affect your ability to care for yourself. People who are depressed may find it more difficult to muster the energy to exercise and make dietary changes and may not take medications regularly.

Mental health disorders linked to heart disease include depression, post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), schizophrenia, anxiety, and bipolar or manic depressive disease. PTSD may

develop after a major serious illness— such as a heart attack—and affects as many as 7 million adults in the United States.The risk of developing a heart attack is twice as high for those with a mental disorder at any point in their lives than for those who are mentally healthy.

Your mental health doesn’t just affect your risk of heart disease. The same conditions that cause heart attacks can also cause strokes and are also linked to the risk of stroke. People with mental disorders at any point in their lives double their risk of stroke compared to those who are mentally healthy. Those who take psychiatric medications such as antidepressants, mood-stabilizers, and anti-psychotics have three times the risk of a stroke compared to those who do not need such medications.

What’s the connection? Mood disorders such as depression, anxiety, and other mental illness affect the hormonal systems in the body. Stress hormones increase, which cause blood pressure and heart rate to go up. Blood vessels constrict, which also affects blood pressure. This fight-or-

flight response may become chronic, damaging blood vessels and making the heart less sensitive to chemical signals to slow down or speed up when the body’s demands change.

No one is saying that having mental illness directly causes heart disease or stroke. However, people who deal with mental illness may self-medicate with substances such as tobacco or alcohol, which are connected to heart disease and stroke. Mental illness may cause an individual to develop an eating disorder and become obese—also linked to increased risks for heart disease. Some psychiatric medications cause weight gain. People with mental illness may find it more difficult to manage their health because of the symptoms of the disorder.

If you have a mental illness, get help and follow your doctor’s advice. If someone you love has mental illness, you may need to help out or even take charge. Mentally ill people may not realize how important it is to follow their doctor’s instructions, and you may need to provide the extra support to help them stay healthy.

• Always watch kids around water

• Fence all pools

• Stay away from drains

You never know which step might save a life, until it does.

“The best defense against usurpatory government is an assertive citizenry.”

William F. Buckley, Jr.

FOOLPROOF SIGNS OF A HEALTHY RELATIONSHIP

No relationship is perfect, and even happy couples occasionally have problems. Healthy relationships are those in which couples handle conflict constructively. However, every relationship is different. Just because yours isn’t like someone else’s doesn’t mean it’s an unhealthy relationship. Someone who calls your relationship unhealthy might not have the same criteria as you and your partner. Here are some questions to help gauge whether you’re in a healthy relationship or not.

1) IS THERE ANY PASSION?

Passion is the strong desire to be close to and intimate with your partner. It’s deeper than sexual desire—it’s the excitement of wanting to be with them and make them happy. Do you both still want to be close to each other, feel good with each other, and want each other to be happy? A healthy relationship only happens when this feeling is mutual.

2) CAN YOU COMPROMISE?

Compromising means giving something up to accommodate your partner. The fewer values, goals, and lifestyles you share, the more you’ll have to compromise. In healthy relationships, partners compromise out of respect and trust. If you can compromise easily without feeling pressured or unloved, your relationship is probably healthy.

3) DO YOU KNOW YOUR PARTNER WELL?

Couples who know each other well know their partner’s fears, what they want out of life, and what excites them. They know each others’ achievements, accomplishments, weaknesses, and vulnerabilities. Do you know these things about your partner, and does your partner know these things about you? Couples in healthy relationships rarely wonder if they know their partners.

4) DO YOU COMMUNICATE YOUR FEELINGS CLEARLY?

The ability to communicate is one of the best indicators of a healthy relationship. Do you communicate easily, or do you feel as though your partner never hears or remembers a thing you say? In healthy relationships, partners can express both positive and negative feelings freely and easily and without anger or frustration.

5) DO YOU RESPECT THEIR PERSPECTIVES AND BELIEFS?

Respecting your partner’s beliefs means giving them room to think independently, even when you disagree. You don’t have to share the same beliefs on everything, even controversial issues, to have a good relationship. However, people in healthy relationships can disagree and hold conflicting beliefs without fighting or letting their differences erode the relationship.

6) DO YOU SUPPORT EACH OTHER?

Supporting each other means more than just being there for them, helping them with problems, or always taking their side when things go wrong. It also means taking your partner’s wants and needs seriously and taking steps to meet them. People in healthy relationships don’t have to constantly remind each other about those wants and needs because they are already being met.

7) ARE YOU SATISFIED WITH WHO YOUR PARTNER IS?

Are you happy with who your partner is right now, or are you hoping he or she will change? Waiting for your partner to change is unhealthy for a relationship. People in healthy relationships are happy with their partners right now. They

aren’t waiting for who their partner could be or missing who they used to be.

8) ARE YOU PROUD TO INTRODUCE YOUR PARTNER TO FRIENDS?

Introducing your partner to your friends and family shows you respect, admire, and are comfortable with him or her. It shows you trust your partner not to put you down or embarrass you in front of others and you will treat your partner the same way. A healthy relationship is one in which couples readily display this mutual trust.

9) ARE YOU HAPPY WITH THE RELATIONSHIP?

When couples are happy with their relationship, they constantly protect it. They address problems quickly and resolve them, so they don’t escalate. Unhappy partners often do many subtle things, sometimes even subconsciously, to destroy or escape the relationship. Couples in healthy relationships eliminate threats instead of creating them.

10) ARE YOUR EXPECTATIONS REALISTIC?

Many relationships fall apart because the couple had unrealistic expectations either about the relationship or each other. They may have idealized their partner or believed the relationship was “meant to be” when it wasn’t. Couples in healthy relationships don’t need to rush through relationship milestones or create a “fairy tale” image—they realize things sometimes go wrong and neither partner will meet all the needs and desires of the other.

A relationship doesn’t have to be perfect to be healthy, but if you can answer yes to the questions above, your relationship is on the right track. Working on the areas that are lacking can make your relationship stronger. However, every relationship is unique—your relationship might not have the same qualities as someone else’s, but it doesn’t mean you can’t be happy together. You and your partner may not need the same things other couples need, but you can always use the guidelines above as conversation points to improve upon your relationship and make it as healthy as possible.

SINGLES: ON VALENTINE’S DAY, DO WHATEVER YOUR HEART DESIRES

WRITER: SANDY L. PINSON

FOR A LOT OF LADIES, THE THOUGHT OF SPENDING VALENTINE’S DAY ALONE IS DEPRESSING. NOT HAVING SOMEONE SPECIAL TO SHARE THIS DAY WITH CAN BE SAD AND LONELY. HOWEVER, BEING SINGLE DOESN’T MEAN YOUR VALENTINE’S DAY CAN’T BE WONDERFUL.

Here are some useful tips on how to have a wonderful time being single on Valentine’s Day:

•Plan a girl’s night out with single friends. Go out to the theater, the movies, or something a little more upbeat such as bowling, rollerblading, and so forth. This is a great way for you and your single friends to celebrate Valentine’s Day in style, and it also give you and your friends the opportunity to dress up and look great.

•Organize a singles get-together. Invite all of your single girlfriends and ask each of them to bring a single guy. Play soft music, and serve appetizers and a few drinks to lighten the mood. You could also play matchmaking board games with your guests to keep them entertained. Purchase board games designed for use by couples and match up your single friends to play the game. This is a fun way for your guests to get to know one another.

•Head out to some of the local hot spots with your single girlfriends and spend the evening partying. This is a great opportunity to meet new people. If you’re lucky, you might wind up meeting someone special that you will spend your next Valentine’s Day with. Just let loose, and you will be amazed at how much fun you and your friends will have.

•Host a movie night at your place. Instead of being sad and miserable, rent a couple of romantic comedies and enjoy them with friends. Maybe you’ll watch a couple of action movies to forget the romance part and enjoy an evening with the girls.

•Get dressed up and go out to dinner with your single friends. Use this day as an opportunity to indulge in some good food. Make reservations for dinner at one of the fancy restaurants in town. After all, single ladies have to eat too! Restaurants are extremely crowded on Valentine’s Day so be sure to plan ahead.

•Organize a spa day with your single friends. Get facials, massages, manicures, and pedicures before heading out for the evening. This will be fun and is a great bonding experience for you and your girlfriends. It’s also a great way to get rid of all the stress that comes with being single on Valentine’s Day.

Remember, just because you’re single, it doesn’t mean that you shouldn’t enjoy Valentine’s Day. It is also a great opportunity to try new things. Why wait in misery for someone to make you feel special on this day? With or without a valentine, you deserve the best so don’t be afraid to pamper and spoil yourself rotten on Valentine’s Day.

Gregory Samano II, D.O.

Sutphin, RDMS

BE ASSERTIVE, NOT AGGRESSIVE

WRITER: CHARLIE BENTLEY

Assertiveness is a powerful skill that can be learned and developed to improve your career prospects, business dealings, personal relationships, and even your mental health. Learning to be more assertive involves using effective communications skills to assert your needs, rights, opinions, and beliefs. Here are three reasons you need to be more assertive in your relationships:

Passiveness Rarely Leads to Success

Passive people tend to put other people’s needs before their own, often because they don’t value their needs very highly. Low self-esteem, depression, anxiety, and false beliefs can cause people to devalue their rights, needs, feelings and emotions. This leads to increasingly passive behavior. Success, whether in business, parenting, or personal relationships, is almost impossible to achieve when you adopt a passive attitude. To truly succeed in any area of life, you have to believe your rights are as important as anyone else’s.

Passiveness is Bad for Relationships

Passive people rarely express what they want; they prefer to wait for someone else to offer the right solution. The problem with this approach is that it requires other people to predict or guess what you want. Often, this makes it likely you will be dissatisfied and disappointed when they fail to recognize your needs. It can also be incredibly frustrating for the family and friends of passive people to have to guess what is expected of them. Relationships and life, in general, run more smoothly when you ask for what you need.

Passiveness Leads to Mental Health Problems

Passiveness can cause internal conflicts that lead to negative behaviors, such as aggressive, passive-aggressive, and manipulative behaviors, particularly in close relationships. The human brain is designed to look after our best interests, which means it naturally rebels when you ignore your needs. Depression, anxiety, eating disorders, obsessive-compulsive disorder, and other mental health problems can also occur if you continually suppress your needs. Speaking up for yourself and telling those close to you what you need makes a huge difference, helping to manage depression, anxiety and other mood disorders.

Passive behavior causes problems in all areas of your life— your career, business, parenting, and personal relationships. Becoming more assertive. Stand up for your rights and boost your self-esteem and confidence. Learning to respect and value your rights, needs, feelings, and emotions is the first step to being more assertive.

“Rule No.1: Never lose money. Rule No.2: Never forget rule No.1.”

— Warren Buffett

BUDGETING: IT’S EASY MONEY

WRITER: SAMANTHA KAY

Following a budget often feels like punishment because most budgets are introduced to get rid of debt and improve a financial situation. Some people think it means cutting out enjoyable spending and losing all the fun in life. That is not what a budget is at all. It creates opportunities and increases quality of life, regardless of present circumstances.

Low-income individuals are not the only ones that need to follow a budget. No matter what your income, a budget is meant to maximize every dollar and prevent financial disaster. Using a budget properly allows you to enjoy life without overindulging at the expense of important financial matters. It brings balance and security to your finances and stress level. A proper budget can help those in debt and those with excess monthly income alike.

Budgets include several spending categories with monthly or weekly limits. In the beginning, estimate and make assumptions. If possible, spend a month or so tracking spending to get a better idea of where your money is going. You may need to adjust categories as time goes by if some limitations cause problems.

Your first category should be savings, including retirement contributions and building an emergency fund for at least six months of living expenses. Pay yourself first by subtracting your desired savings from your total monthly take-home pay. Consider this a hands-off category that you can’t adjust. If changes need to be made, make them with other spending

habits. However, set a reasonable savings goal. Try to save at least 5 to 20 percent of your income each month.

Next, subtract your total fixed expenses, including rent or mortgage payments, cable, insurance, and other bills that stay the same every month. Variable expenses fall into two categories—necessary expenses and extra expenses. Necessary expenses include food, gas, utilities, etc. Estimate high to allow for higher cost months. Extra variable expenses are eating out, snacks, coffee, books, music, clothes, electronics, and anything else not considered an extra or unnecessary expense. You can make this a single category, or split it.

After subtracting savings, fixed expenses, and necessary variable expenses, the remainder of your money goes toward the final extra category. Did your money run out before you finished estimating categories? Do you have a small amount leftover for extra spending or is there more than you would normally spend in a month? It may take some time adjusting in order to get your categories where you want them.

If you are accustomed to spending an excessive amount of money and saving nothing, you may feel deprived. However, excessive spending gets you in more debt, and may keep you from retiring or achieving other important financial goals. Learn how to live on less and enjoy life in ways you don’t spend money. Soon, you won’t miss going out to eat every night or buying new clothes every weekend.

Learn to cut back in other places if necessary. For example, shop with coupons and sales to cut back on groceries, cut out cable if you don’t watch television enough to justify it, and learn to save money on gas. If you are in the process of getting rid of debt, you may want to cut extra spending altogether resulting in a lot of free time. To fill that time and to get your debt paid off faster, get a part-time job. In fact, a part-time job is a great way to increase income and savings whether you have current debt or not.

A budget isn’t supposed to be a new restriction. It’s meant to show what you really can afford. If you feel restricted, you are living above your means. Cut back on spending or find a way to make more money. Don’t value money more than your life and your relationships. Learn how to manage money to maximize its benefit.

FINANCIAL COMPATIBILITY FOR COUPLES SHE SAVES/HE SPENDS

WRITER: JAN BURCH

Do similar financial outlooks mean a couple is compatible while differing financial styles may spell doom for happily ever after? With many factors contributing to the success of a marriage, the answer is not as simple as it seems. If you’re in a relationship that’s becoming serious, you and your partner should explore your financial compatibility before the question is popped, and definitely before you say “I do.”

Assess your partner’s behavior, and your own, in money-related situations. How does he tip in a restaurant— generously, sparingly, or just right? Does she stick to a monthly budget, or does she blow her paycheck on shoes while charging groceries to her credit card?

Refine your observations with a financial compatibility quiz, which you can find online. Make it a game: each person answers the questions for themselves and their partner, followed by a heart-toheart conversation when you compare your answers. Use this information to decide whether you’re a spender or saver. Then think about how your relationship may fare over time:

Two Spenders

Two spenders might seem to have a lot in common, but individual spending habits may cause ongoing conflict. He criticizes her interest in home decorating when she buys new items to redo the rooms, while she’s

taken aback at his spending on car accessories and electronic gadgets. If their income is high enough, they might write off the conflict as simple lovers’ spats—until the unchecked spending brings financial ruin. However, it can work if partners communicate well and commit to developing good financial habits— both individually and as a couple.

Saver and Spender

One likes to save, while the other enjoys spending. This could be the best financial strategy of all time or a source of endless conflict within the marriage. If you keep it positive, the spender can learn about budgeting, record keeping, and goal setting from the saver, while the saver learns to view wisely chosen expenditures as investments. As long as the partners maintain good communication and regularly review finances, this oddcouple combination can have solid staying power.

Two Savers

With two savers in the family, you might think it’s the ideal situation because both partners should have some basic agreement on the value of savings. But a family’s financial health involves much more. There are daily details such as bill paying and record keeping to be worked out, along with long-term goals such as travel, a new home, retirement, or children’s education. It’s fine to save, but saving should serve family’s goals.

In the worst case scenario, two savers might penny-pinch to the point of hoarding. For example, putting off needed home repairs if it means dipping into savings. Delaying repairs can lead to more serious problems that are more expensive to fix, reducing the home’s value over time.

Going Forward

By now you and your intended should understand your respective financial types and how they work together, for better or worse. Next, discuss details: how expenses are shared, who pays the bills and balances the checkbook, goals for short-term and long-term savings, and so on. If you create a plan that suits both of you, your financial compatibility, or lack thereof, doesn’t have to be a deal-breaker. As with all aspects of married life, good communication is the key to harmony.

Final Impression

QUIT CLOWNING AROUND

WRITER: JAMES COMBS

Religiously watching “The Bozo Show” on WGN was one of my favorite childhood memories.

My brother and I would excitedly awake on summer mornings and race downstairs to see America’s most iconic clown, Bozo, and his colorful sidekick, Cookie. The red-haired, white-faced Bozo—with his floppy shoes and shiny, red nose—was a good-natured clown with a big heart and smile to match.

I remember him for being kid-friendly, happy, and loveable. There was not a mean bone in his body.

Fast-forward some 30 years. How did clowns go from being fantastically funny to freakishly frightening?

That’s the question many are asking in the wake of this creepy clown craze that’s seeping into our cultural fabric like toxic sewage. In case you haven’t heard, clown attacks, clown scares, and clown pranks have been reported in communities throughout the country. Some are hoaxes. Others are credible events.

And Lake County is not immune. In October, three Tavares Middle School students were charged for wearing clown masks at a school bus stop. The incident happened near Treadway Elementary, forcing administrators to place the school on lockdown. In other parts of the country, clowns have attempted to lure children into the woods, and one clown even faced felony charges after wielding a machete near an apartment complex.

This is bizarre behavior. So much so that it’s twisting Stephen King’s brilliant-yettwisted mind. Here’s what the master of horror wrote on Twitter:

“Hey, guys, time to cool the clown hysteria—most of ‘em are good, cheer up the kiddies, make people laugh.”

This impassioned plea is coming from the same guy who once wrote a book about a supernatural killer clown named Pennywise that was later made into a film. So you know this is no laughing matter.

It’s certainly no laughing matter for Bozo fans such as myself who have always adored clowns because they made us smile with their goofy theatrics. We’ve had to face the disappointing reality that not everybody sees clowns through the same happy lens we do. In fact, after conducting some research, it’s apparent that the persona of the creepy clown has existed for decades.

Some people are convinced that anyone who wears a costume and excessive makeup is hiding something dark, and evil must lurk inside. This perception may stem from serial killer John Wayne Gacy, who murdered 33 young males in Chicago. He was dubbed “The Clown Killer” because he performed as “Pogo The Clown” at children’s birthday parties. Following Gacy, Hollywood exploited this ambivalence about clowns by delivering Joker, a clowninspired villain in the Batman movies, and the unforgettable scary clown doll from the 1982 movie “Poltergeist”. Other scary clown movies include “Killer Klowns from Outer Space” (1988) and the murderous clown in “All Hallow’s Eve” (2013).

Blame Stephen King, John Wayne Gacy, Hollywood, or whomever. The bottom line is this: Some people are permanently wired to be scared of clowns and feel they are infinitely more frightening than wicked witches or headless horsemen. Their fear has become a phobia.

The creepy clown craze has seized upon that phobia and is costing ‘real’ clowns both jobs and fans. It has also created an unsettling juxtaposition about clowns—the smiling face and evil heart, the hilarious antics and sinister acts, the makeup that evokes a sense of joy and distrust.

Here’s a friendly reminder to the public. Don’t assume all those with greasepaint makeup and red noses are bad people. Good clowns visit children’s hospitals and nursing homes and spread joy with their big wigs, big hearts, and big smiles.

Today’s fake, sinister clowns? Well, they’re not bozos. They’re just downright crazy.