Cameo’s cauldron
… in which Cameo Miller stirs her thoughts and ideas to see what rises to the top.
Diane is a stable owner in my area who is parents who offer to help with something around the barn at times. Even little kind- always giving gifts—her expressed mission nesses like holding a door open for some- is to make horses available and affordable one or bringing their bridle out with your to those who really can’t afford them (and it’s also just the kind of person she is). She own is really a gift. I have already written a whole article has given so much to me and to the people about how wonderfully kind our horses who ride at her stable, for so many years, and with not nearly as much are. A hundred times each appreciative praise as she day they give us and our deserves. Which is another students gifts of kindness, patience, and stoic endur- ..how wonderfully point we must consider. So often these gifts are overance that is immeasurable. As long as there isn’t anger kind our horses looked or ignored, or even expected, because that’s or malicious intent, they just the way that person will put up with so much are. A hundred or horse is. Try an experithat they really do not and ment for one week, or even should not have to—but they times each day for one day. Consciously be give this to us over and over again. Even the ones who they give us and aware and look for all the gifts you see around you. aren’t school horses put up No matter how you think with us when we unintenour students people should be, recognize tionally do something that is hurtful to them or puts them gifts of kindness, that they do not have to act in any certain way. Then be in situations they clearly aware of the actions of the would rather not be in. And patience, people (and horses) around the worst we usually get in you. How many gifts do you response is some resistance and stoic find? Some people also call as they make their impression known to us. endurance that is these “acts of kindness”, but sometimes that implies These are all gifts that we give and receive all year immeasurable... something which is out of the ordinary. These count long, not just at Christmas too, of course, but I’m spetime. Sometimes we overcifically talking in this artilook things that happen routinely, or we don’t discern their impor- cle about all the things which are done routance because they become expected and tinely, and which we may have begun to just ordinary. We don’t recognize kindness or take for granted. You have the choice every second of every a smile, or a million other small and large things as gifts. But they are. We all know day to be kind or unkind; to give or withpeople who are sullen, pessimistic, and hold your gifts. You have the choice to ungrateful; people who are not helpful to appreciate or take for granted the gifts othanyone. Those who believe it is all one ers give to you. Christmas is a time of givway—they take from everyone else and give ing presents. Life is about determining what little or nothing back. Those who tie every- you are going to do about giving gifts. thing they “give” to a price that is expected in return. A true gift has no strings and no “price”—it is just given. And we all have the choice of how we are going to be every sec- About the author: ond of every day. No one is required to be Cameo Miller is a Masters-level clinical psychologist and a Level IV ARIA Certified Instructor based either nice or sullen. We each choose how in Michigan. She is a member of the ARIA Evaluation Panel and National Riding Instructors Convention Staff. we are going to behave.
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Gifts By Cameo Miller Illustration by Bethany Caskey
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his issue of Riding Instructor comes out about Christmas time, which leads me to think about gifts. Not the kind that we put into boxes and wrap up, but a different kind of gift that we give to others and that they give to us. The gift of patience we give to our students as we repeat something for the 10th time because they have forgotten as they concentrate on something else. The gift of patience we expect from them as they struggle to grasp a skill they are having trouble with. And the extraordinary patience our school horses gift to both of us as they put up with the unintended abuse from unskilled riders. The gift of our smile and praise when a student finally really “gets” something, or their beam of joy when they really feel it for the first time. The gift of encouragement that our students can give to each other when one of them is having a particularly difficult time. The gift a parent can give by picking up someone who would otherwise have trouble getting to lessons. Students or
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Winter 2019–20 | Riding Instructor
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