2017
>> Scrambled Heads >> Sports & Mental Health >> Being Assertive >> Loneliness >> Smoking Study >> Wellbeing News >> Art, Science & more
ISSUE 61
MAGAZINE FOR WELLBEING
Equilibrium Patron Dr Liz Miller Mind Champion 2008
What Equilibrium means to me‌. WEB ALERTS If you know anyone who would like to be on our mailing list and get the magazine four times a year (no spam!) please email: equilibriumteam@hotmail. co.uk (www.haringey.gov.uk/ equilibrium). Equilibrium is devised, created, and produced entirely by team members with experience of the mental health system. Photo copyright remains with all individual artists and Equilibrium. All rights reserved. 2011
Graphic Design: Anthony J. Parke
I enjoyed writing a short article for the mental health magazine Equilibrium based on my personal experience of having a mental illness for the last 20 years. The office environment and people were all friendly and gave support on tap, especially when you got stuck for ideas or needed technical help using the computer. The other contributors present all shared a mental health history, so gelled well together and we were made to feel very welcome. Norman I found Equilibrium at a crucial point, where I found an open door to try a new healing form of writing and expression. Honest, happy, healthy. One thing I have to say, I go at my own pace and learn little lessons on computers, in art and writing, communicating, and ultimately a chance to get some self-confidence and self-esteem back after being belittled and degraded and abused. I found the open light of Equilibrium at the end of a dark tunnel of life. Equilibrium gives me a purpose. Thank you. Blessings. Richard The magazine means a lot to me for the reason is that it allows me to write about various aspects of mental health and wellbeing. This is one of the only places where you can talk about this sticky matter and issues surrounding wellbeing. Working here also allows me to meet like-minded people, who are passionate about talking about their experiences of their conditions. Seeing these issues being published spreads information on mental health, and other topics, even further. Devzilla Equilibrium has been a fantastic form of expression for me. I have the choice to write about what I want and I can put my ideas into practice. I have been with Equilibrium since 2007 and I never run out of ideas of things to write about. I have enjoying writing articles, and reviews about plays, books and galleries. The Equilibrium team has changed from time to time, but we still manage to produce four copies of the magazine a year. Angela
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EDITORIAL Spring is here and so is a lovely new issue of Equilibrium! Spring is often thought of as a time of new beginnings, as the flowers come out, the days get longer, and we start to feel more energised after the long winter. This will be my last issue as editor of Equilibrium, as I have a new beginning myself, moving to Devon to do a PhD, researching theatre and mental health. But I’ll still be contributing and staying in touch; I’ve had an amazing time facilitating the group over the last four and a half years. Thank you, everyone! We are always delighted to hear from new people who would like to contribute to our magazine, so do please spread the word! We love your feedback, so tweet us @teamequilibrium or email equilibriumteam@hotmail. co.uk. We hope you enjoy the team’s hard work, and a special thanks, as always, to Anthony for his wonderful design skills. Kate, Editor/Team Facilitator
DISCLAIMER Equilibrium is produced by service users. Reproduction in whole or in part is strictly forbidden without the prior permission of the Equilibrium team. Products, articles and services advertised in this publication do not necessarily carry the endorsement of Equilibrium or any of our partners. Equilibrium is published and circulated electronically four times a year to a database of subscribers; if you do not wish to receive Equilibrium or have received it by mistake, please email unsubscribe to equilibriumteam@hotmail.co.uk
THE TEAM Facilitator/ Editor: Kate Massey-Chase. Editorial team: Dev, Ian, Angela, Nigel, Richard, Emily, Manto, Richard.
CONTACT US Equilibrium, Clarendon Recovery College, Clarendon Road, London, N8 ODJ. 02084894860, equilibriumteam@hotmail.co.uk. We are in the office on Friday afternoons 2.30-4.30, but you can leave a message at other times and we’ll get back to you.
CONTRIBUTIONS Wanted: contributions to Equilibrium! Please email us with your news, views, poems, photos, plus articles. Anonymity guaranteed if required.
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Summer/ Issue 38
Wellbeing News Money earmarked for mental health is going to fund NHS over-spend instead
be ok’. She is running these in partner-
NHS England’s finance chief, Paul
where they will be held fortnightly after-
Baumann says, £800m, which was ‘fund-
hours. At the moment they are just in a
ing that would have been available
handful of locations around the country,
from CCGs for mental health services,
but here at Equilibrium we think they are
community health services, primary care
a great idea and hope it expands to
and other things’, will now be used to
more venues soon!
offset the overspend by NHS hospitals in
Frazled Cafes
ship with Marks and Spencer’s cafés,
2015-16. Barbara Keeley, shadow minister for mental health, has said: ‘The news that the government is using mental health funding to plug the gaps in other
Spring Budget
NHS spending flies in the face of Tory
In the Spring Budget, the Chancellor of
government pledges for improved fund-
the Exchequer, Philip Hammond, has
ing for mental health.’
announced more funding for Sustain-
The Guardian
ability and Transformation Plans (STPs), social care and the liaison between GPs
Ruby Wax’s ‘Frazzled Cafés’
and Accident and Emergency (A&E) services in England. Vicki Nash, Head
Ruby Wax, a passionate spokesperson
of Policy and Campaigns at the char-
for the importance of talking about
ity Mind, has responded with this state-
our mental health, is launching Fraz-
ment:
zled Cafés, to ‘provide a “talk-in” place
where people who are feeling frazzled
ing in these three areas, all of which
can meet on a regular basis to talk and
are vital to people with mental health
share their personal stories in a safe,
problems. While the extra money is
anonymous and non-judgmental envi-
appreciated, what the system actually
ronment - a place where it’s ok, to not
does with it will really go to show if the
“We welcome additional fund-
Cont.
www.haringey.gov.uk/equilibrium
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Government and the NHS is genuinely
trained to teach mindfulness, according
committed to making mental health as
to the Mindfulness Initiative, and that this
important as physical health. It’s also
number is growing all the time. Research
worrying that the Chancellor failed to
suggests that mindfulness can help with
mention mental health explicitly, despite
concentration, self-compassion and
the Prime Minister’s rhetoric around the
managing stress – this isn’t just important
‘burning injustices’ still faced by the
for providing an environment where
people Mind represent. Far too many
children can learn, but are also life-long
people with mental health problems tell
tools.
us they’ve been stuck in hospital when
The Mindfulness Initiative.
there’s nowhere else for them to go, or conversely that they’re discharged too soon after being admitted at their most
Watching birds from your window
unwell, experiencing a mental health
Recent research from academics at
crisis. Even after you’ve left hospital,
the University of Exeter, the British Trust
whether for physical or mental health
for Ornithology and the University of
problems, or both, it’s really important
Queensland, has proved that watching
you’re given follow-up support to help
birds near your home is good for your
you get well, stay well and get your life
mental health and that people living in
back on track. At the moment we know
neighbourhoods with more birds, shrubs
far too few people with mental health
and trees are less likely to suffer from
problems are provided with the ongo-
depression, anxiety and stress. Interest-
ing support they might need after a
ingly, the study shows that it is not the
spell in hospital, and can end up being
species of birds that you can see that
re-admitted.”
makes the difference, but the number of birds.
MIND www.exeter.ac.uk
Mindfulness to help children’s mental well-being in schools We are really pleased to hear that over 5,000 teachers in the UK have been
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Summer/ Issue 38
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Scrambled Heads Tackling Mental Health Head On Emily Palmer
M
y name is Emily Palmer. I’m 18 years old, and the author and illustrator of Scram-
bled Heads. Scrambled Heads is a Children’s Guide to Mental Health. The book can support children who are suffering with their mental health, but also raise awareness with their siblings, family, friends, classmates and also children of parents who are suffering with poor mental health. Featuring simple cartoon-style drawings of humanised eggs, the book explains, in a simple-but-fun way, what happens when “our brain is poorly”, and how it can affect our thoughts and feelings, and our relationships with others. I was inspired to write the book after my own experiences with mental health. Having battled with anxiety and anorexia nervosa, I wanted to use my own experiences to encourage conversations on such an important topic. As a child I recall reading a book about visiting the hospital if I felt poorly,
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however, when I started to experience
the book so far include primary school
mental health problems there was nothing
teachers, parents and family members. I have received some brilliant feedback
to explain what would happen to you as a patient or who you could talk to.
from my sales already. One parent left a review that said: “I got
I want to help create a world where
mental health is discussed with children,
this book as my son is suffering with mental
and we can talk in more than whispers
illness at the moment. When he really
about our experiences. We should be
isn’t coping, his siblings looked like rabbits
proud to talk of our achievements and
caught in the headlights. They were as
successes in battling something that can
scared and confused as my son was and
take away so much.
it was really difficult to explain what was
happening in a way they would under-
I fully funded the project and I have sold
hundreds of copies in four countries across
stand and that would not frighten them.
the world.
This book now lives on my coffee table and
we talk about ‘scrambled heads’daily.”
Whilst writing Scrambled Heads, I
Another says it is a ‘must-read’ for “any
worked with teachers, psychiatrists, parents, children and mental health
child/young person dealing with mental
patients to make sure the book was accu-
health, either personally or not” and that
rate, easy to understand, and complete
“all schools should have a copy”. 10% of profits from Scrambled Heads are
with a positive message.
My main aim when writing Scrambled
Heads was to bridge a gap in the educa-
being donated directly to YoungMinds, the children’s mental health charity.
tion of mental health. Mental health affects everyone and this book aims to
help the readers recognise that it is not
‘Scrambled Heads’ is available to order on
something to be ashamed of, and it is okay
Amazon for £5.99 plus postage.
to speak up. Customers who have bought
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Know My Mind KNOW MY MIND is a small community therapeutic/educational theatre group which explores the issues of mental ill-health from service users’ and carers’ perspectives of the mental health system in Britain today.
K
MM uses creative theatre to bring
don. She is also the author of the play
to life complex issues faced in the
and was inspired to go beyond the
community. KMM is a voluntary group, registered
‘safety net’ of the therapeutic environment of the group, and with the permis-
as a limited company. At present, the
sion of the group members penned their
company is not funded but has received
stories in a report: ‘Tell it like it is: Mental
financial support for one-off events from
Health in the Community – Opening
the Maudsley Hospital, community fund-
Pandora’s Box?’
ing, and the Croydon Commissioning Group. KMM evolved from the director, a carer, attending a carers’ group in Croy-
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So U Think I’m Crazy? A natural progression of expression and truth, ‘SO U THINK I’M CRAZY?’ was writ-
Summer/ Issue 38
ten with ease to expose the reality of an
ill-health through the eyes of a young
oppressive system behind locked doors
black male. It exposes the inadequacies
in a psychiatric hospital, from a service
of the mental health service in the UK. It
user and a carer’s perspective.
looks at the impact of trauma and the
Professional actors were carefully audi-
thin line of our own personal fragility of
tioned for each character in the play.
mental wellbeing and the vulnerability of
All actors are volunteers and have
the risk of ‘falling off the edge’.
shown 100% commitment to raising the
To date, ‘SO U THINK I’M CRAZY?’ has
level of awareness of mental ill-health
played live on stage up and down the
in the community. All cast members are
country to an audience of over 2000
offered emotional support in recognition
people with excellent reviews. It will be
of the subject matter and the require-
showing again in the summer of 2017,
ment to immerse themselves in the char-
so keep an eye on the website (see
acter.
below). Watch and be prepared to be
The stage show ‘SO U THINK I’M CRAZY?’ is an emotive piece of therapeutic drama which uses rap, poetry,
mesmorised! http://www.knowmymind.org/
dance and music to express mental
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Summer/ Issue 38
Label of Myself April Woodburn
I
have felt a constant insecurity since
and then ended up in a church in
being a little child. Silenced by the
which my grandfather use to pray. I
need to protect my innermost feelings
would bring in presents for my friends
and sense of loss, loss of myself and my
at school until they politely explained I
mind. I have had, as society would say,
did not need to do this. I would exces-
a mental health problem for as long as
sively clean or not clean through my
I can remember. However, I have never early teens. I would cry on the carpet been labelled with a mental health
of my bathroom floor until I could not
disorder, and for that I am extremely
cry anymore.
grateful. The label I would be given today
My mother and father met in a Narcotics Anonymous meeting, both
would be OCD. I used to Febreeze
there recovering from a life lived on the
my school blazer until I smelt like a
edge. There was a lust within both of
perfume shop. I used to bring all my
them to be together, however harmful
belongings to school in my briefcase
they may become to each other. This
until the teachers of my school sat me
would be, for my mum, a relationship
down and explained this was not suit-
with an exotic man, and for my father
able. A compulsive liar, I used to lie
he saw another lady that he could
about where I lived, that I lived in a
draw into his life. The foundation of our
palace and had a butler and a red
family was set. Mental illness, addiction and
carpet. I ran away to Brixton on a bus
what would become domestic abuse.
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I was a product of a mother dealing with emotional distresses caused by
learn, grow and develop. Today, I do not have a mental health
a difficult start to her life, and a father
problem. Today, I do not take medication
with the same. That resulted in my
or seek out an outlet for the pain. However,
mother being hospitalized and me and
I do find it hard to deal with relationships,
my sister being taken away. My father
and I do have difficulties with my self-worth
took me in; unfortunately, this became
and self-esteem. I do not need a doctor
an environment for domestic abuse.
in a white jacket to tell me who I am; I
If someone dug a little deeper and
know who I am, and I have a definite right
noted that my quirky ways may have
to have individualized support. I find that
been something more… If some-
support in my loved ones, in my therapist. I
one could have noted my dysfunc-
reach out, I give and I receive.
tional attachments to others and my outbursts… It is hard to observe the world
I believe that, for some, there are incredible benefits to being labelled with a mental health disorder. For the individuals
through your parents’ eyes when they
this helps, I am extremely grateful the help
have a clouded perception of the
is there for you.
world in the first place. Therefore, I do not feel the difficulties
For me, or for people who may have had the same child experiences, I feel
I have faced are a result, I do not feel,
there is no chemical imbalance and there
of the genetics that were embedded in
is no disorder. Our experiences are a natu-
me; feeling low and depressed is not a
ral consequence of our pasts. There was a
personality trait. It was the environment
time when we were growing and learning
which I was born in. I saw a dysfunc-
and some things weren’t as they should
tional way of treating each other. It was
have been.
a difficult environment within which to
I have an attachment and a relationship
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Summer/ Issue 38
with both of my parents, and I am slowly forgiving and healing from the past. I do, however, acknowledge we all should be accountable for our actions towards each other and the cause and effect of abuse, neglect and emotional distresses. My self-concept is at times broken and confused; however, for me, there is no mental illness. My mum has no mental illness; there is learnt behaviour and an emotionally stressful past. There needs to be a change for people that, at times, have mental or emotional distress. A new language that does not preserve mental ill-health as a stigma, as a problem, and as something that needs to be shut away. If we can embrace our quirks, we can be honest about our past, and if we can undo learnt behaviour, then we shall not see ourselves as shameful, harmful humans. We shall see ourselves as beautiful.
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Summer/ Issue 38
Mental Health & Sports NIGEL PRESTATYN
W
e don’t associate mental
themselves with. But things are shift-
illness with sports people. We
ing.
just don’t. We see them as success-
Of course, it’s never about
ful, as champions; we see them as
sports in particular. Mental ill-health
the epitome of health. Certainly on
affects everybody, in all walks of
a physical level, they can be. But
life. But there is value in professional
even that’s only half the story. We
sports people revealing their own
never see the injuries and physi-
personal health issues: it’s important
cal suffering which goes on behind
for people to know that no one is
the scenes. Neither, and more
immune, not even champions!
importantly, do we see the strug-
This has come to the fore recently
gles with mental ill-health which
with revelations by British Champion
goes on behind the scenes for
boxer Tyson Fury about his strug-
sports people. Naturally, having a
gles with his own mental ill-health.
competitive nature, sports people
Some may argue that Fury has
want to succeed, to win, to be
reached the pinnacle of his career,
‘champions’… But rarely do we
finally capturing the European
hear of professional sports people
Boxing Championship title. But, with
talking openly about their struggles
a rematch due, he dramatically
with mental ill-health. Why? Well, it
pulled out, citing mental ill-health
certainly doesn’t fit with the image
and drug use.
of success they wish to surround
cont.
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It is particular important that Tyson lives
London Marathon to raise funds for the
in a very macho-orientated environ-
charity Mind.
ment, and so his speaking openly about
Holmes says, “For me, the desire to
his depression and how it can effect
be successful took its toll and I couldn’t
even boxers, is a valuable message
handle the disappointment of my body
for the general public. Often we hear
constantly letting me down… Mental
how men suffer in silence with their
illness is a terrible thing to have to cope
mental ill-health issues, and this is clearly
with and much more needs to be done
confirmed by the fact that suicide
to help people with this hidden disabil-
remains the biggest single killer of men
ity.”
aged 20-45 in the UK. Another sportsperson to speak
By speaking openly, both Tyson and Holmes have shown that depression
openly about their mental health issues
can affect anyone, even World Cham-
is Dame Kelly Holmes. I don’t suppose
pion boxers and Gold medal-winning
it is widely known, but in her darkest
Olympians. The aim, of course, is to
moments Kelly Holmes self-harmed.
break the cycle of stigma which has
The 45-year-old suffered with depres-
long surrounded sufferers of mental
sion as she struggled to cope with inju-
ill-health. Breaking the stigma means
ries a year before her double Olympic
breaking through the wall of silence.
triumph in Athens in 2004. But impor-
While silence remains there will always
tantly, Holmes speaks openly about the
be people needlessly suffering, and
issues she has suffered, and now backs
high rates of suicide in certain demo-
a mental health campaign after her
graphics. Tyson and Holmes are helping
own battle with depression, running the
to break this cycle.
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Summer/ Issue 38
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Summer/ Issue 38
Film review Nigel Prestatyn
L
ion has to be one of the most
train, with all its doors locked, hundreds
moving films of the year. I don’t cry
of miles from home. The small boy is
watching films, but for this one I made
trapped on the train for two entire days.
an exception! There are two aspects at
Eventually he ends up lost on the other
work as to why this film was moving for
side of the country. At only 6 years old
me: that it is a wonderfully written story,
he doesn’t know the name of where
fact-based (which makes it so much
he’s from, so has no way of returning
more poignant), and that it particularly
home.
resonated with me and my own life.
Fast forward a year or two, in and
Lion is about a young Indian boy
out of orphanages, and the boy is
of 6 who is out with his elder brother
eventually adopted by an Austral-
one evening, around the local railway
ian couple. He is flown to Australia to
station, trying to make a few rupees
live with his new adoptive parents. He
for his family. The young boy becomes
settles in well. Soon after the couple
tired, and is left to sleep in an ‘inopera-
adopt another young Indian boy, but
tive’ train while the brother goes out
this boy has a lot of psychological prob-
looking to make money. While the boy
lems, likely from mistreatment.
is asleep, the train comes to life, and
Fast forward a dozen or so years
pulls away. The boy wakes up the next
and the boy is now a grown man. But
morning to find himself on a speeding
suddenly he finds that he is becoming
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more and more troubled. He can’t
I’d never been to India before had
stop thinking about his mother and
thought that finding where he born
brother, who he thinks have been look-
and raised would help me ‘know’ him
ing for him for over twenty years, and
a little more. The only information I
still are. He knows he needs to try and
had was the name of his road, and
find them. And so begins his plan to
the district. There were no A-Z’s in India
figure out where that train was the
that I could find, and this of course
night he was taken by it aged 6.
predated Google Earth, which was
His other adopted brother is now a
used by the young man in the film. So
grown man too, but is a deeply trou-
I did a lot of wandering around the
bled young man. His mental health
district where he was born. After some
issues wreak havoc over the mother
fruitless wandering over several days, I
and father who adopted him.
eventually located the street, fittingly
Now, I can’t say any more about
called ‘Love Lane’. I knocked on the
this story without spoiling it for you.
door and no one answered. And that
Enough to say he sets off to India in
was it. Even though I was pleased to
search of his long lost mother and
see where he was born, the surround-
brother.
ing areas, it somehow felt anti-climac-
So this film really resonated with
tic. I had no idea what I expected or
me. My father was born in Bombay,
wanted. I walked off into the throng-
coming to England when he was a
ing crowds of India feeling no greater
young man. He died when I was rela-
sense of connection, but pleased I had
tively young, aged 14. As a result I
found his house. When I watched the
never felt I really got to know him as
film, it brought back these memories,
much as I would like. So 30 years ago
and so many more besides.
I went on my own journey of discovery, albeit a far more humble one.
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Summer/ Issue 38
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Poems by Marianne Antonis A Church Not Built of Bricks or Stone
Of the Same Flame
By Bakers passage and Oriel place there is a church not built of bricks or stone
Three purple magnolia trees stand: slender-centurions before the square brick house with its huge skylight orb, on Lancaster road;
A living trunk of plain tree gnarled and fenced.
an eye to a world where you can shape your own walls with money and dreams.
Queen of its paved garden; growing wide and tall. Its upper branches smooth; it knows the years before streets and shops and cars. Distant overhanging willows only know their pond on Hampstead Heath;
As if lighter pockets mean we can not build... But we have the same flame as magnolias, and the woman with gold. We are shaping our world with invisible clay. And the fire burns in our living room.
where a single swan preens bright white like gathering gulls
Holly Tree
- I can not hear them call.
Your bark is a rhino’s hide, and your life is as precious as its horn.
A fig tree rests along the water; long past, its trunk broke through the garden wall.
Still, you stand in a fountain garden, while I walk on.
It lives on water and in the soil; each arching branch seems bare, but forms a bud
Lumps rise often around your trunk.
...and figs will grow.
And just before your branches fill with light edged leaves,
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Summer/ Issue 38
growths of bark cluster in balls; but you have no eyes to see. You sense the other trees, the wind and light.
London is the Sea
Ebony Tree: Tell Me What It Is.... Ebony tree: your branches are the strong limbs of an athlete; flexing her muscles and getting set.
On the eve of spring from eight floors looking south: London is the sea; the hills beyond are cliffs
Your bark Is the taught skin of youth; though you know the years.
- where the sun forms a beach with a ribbon of light.
Tell me what it is to stand still and live for a long time;
There are ships on the sea:
unwavering.
St Paul’s is the last in a fleet looking east, in a harbour of roads and hidden islands. And no one sees the waves or the shift of time and light. But now the beach is gone and the fleet is brick and stone. On the eve of Spring looking south: London is just London, and the hills beyond.
And you keep your poise, with many arms in shadow; some in light.
Cherry Tree Cherry tree raises its arms from behind the iron railings, and drinks a toast of white blossoms to its small garden, by the council flats on Hornsey Road. It needs nothing but earth and hidden streams to grow its branches around air and light. Cherry tree.
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KATE
Tourists
in Our Own City
M
y wife, Gem, and I have lived in London for six and a half years. As we
prepare for our imminent move to Devon – bring on the seaside, moors and air that won’t shorten our life expectancy (Gem wants to get chickens and go the full Felicity Kendall!) – we’ve been trying to make the most of our remaining time here. It’s a city that I love and I will really miss, but new adventures are calling. Before we leave we’ve decided to act like proper tourists and work through our ‘London bucket list’. We’ve actually always been pretty good at making the most of the great city we live in (although on a shoe-string budget), but in the last week or so we’ve been to Kew Gardens, up the Gherkin for breakfast in the Sky Garden, round St Paul’s cathedral, and on a tour of Highgate Cemetery. It’s been magical to spend time in amazing and iconic places we’ve always meant to visit. We’ve been walking round London with our eyes wide open, drinking it all in. And although I won’t miss unreliable public transport (we live on a Southern/Thameslink train line) and the cost of living, I think we should all take time to appreciate this beautiful, diverse, crazy city whenever we can.
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Summer/ Issue 38
LONELINESS RICHARD HUDSON
F
irst of all, I’m not lonely, so what
the phone in the evening when I’m more
follows is why, with some near misses
with it. I have many friends and contacts,
in the past, I haven’t been in that situa-
male and female, and although it might
tion for years and years.
have been nice to have been married,
Occasionally for a split second in an
it hasn’t been a practical proposition
evening early in the week (Monday or
health-wise and it wouldn’t have been
Tuesday) I think it might be nice for some-
much of a marriage for my wife. Still time
one to phone, and then perhaps it does
when I’m better! You often don’t real-
ring, or I contact someone. More usually
ise you need the warmth of personality
I realise that overall I need rest and that
from someone else until you automati-
I’m not in a fit state or capable of speak-
cally seek it when you start speaking. As I
ing to anyone, which is the reason I live
read, it is a bit disconcerting for an adult
alone.
to do this but necessary and part and
I do need company and warmth of personality from others, though, and I get that during the day out and about in my routine (which is extensive) or on
parcel for someone and me in this breakdown condition. However, a point about nervous illness and the anxiety state is that it is a lonely
cont.
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EQUILIBRIUM 27
business, not that you are necessarily
last 2 or 3 years the stress and anxiety
lonely but that, for some, you feel you
trapped by the internalised dozing
need to be alone for a lot of the time
has been coming to the surface and
as part of the recovery process, and it
coming out as just said. So all in all not
is that that applies to me. I need abso-
long to go!
lute peace and quiet and no interrup-
One thing that makes this living
tions most nights of the week and need
alone easy to accept is a tip to that
to let myself go, switch off and shout
effect from my good consultant
out sometimes – freak out as it were.
psychiatrist in the late 1980s. I’d read
Sorry neighbours!
that someone who has had a break-
The internalised tension, brain-fag
down shouldn’t really live alone and
and anxiety are gradually coming out
I thought a bit of company might be
of me – through my eyes – if I’m quiet
nice in the form of a lodger in my spare
and let it, like toothpaste coming out of
room. I mentioned this to her at one
a tube, and should be out altogether,
outpatient’s appointment and in a split
my mind seems to say, by July 2017. The second, quick as a flash: ‘Oh’ she said, turning point was 1985 when a Behav-
‘You don’t want someone else muck-
iour Therapist on the NHS stopped me
ing up your routine.’ In other words
dozing which I’d been doing evenings
“DON’T”! She was quite right and as I’m
and weekends for 1½ years whilst hold-
still not better, she’s still right. I thought
ing down a job during the day Monday
about it again in the mid-1990s when
to Friday. It’s taken me all these 30
a Japanese chap persuaded me to
years to get this out of me and in the
put him up for a night. He was so polite
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Summer/ Issue 38
I thought I could get someone similar
alone all day especially those whose
from an English Language college. A
husbands won’t discuss their illness
psychologist I was seeing thought it
or, indeed, won’t discuss much with
should be okay for me. Fortunately I
them. Having to put on an act before
didn’t go ahead and the consultant in
the family accentuates loneliness and
the 1980s is still right.
weariness and even apathy.
If I was stuck in my flat all day, I
To envisage sitting a week alone
would be lonely so my routine and
seems impossible. You have to be at
what I advocate in getting out stops
peace with yourself and even those at
that.
peace need to be occupied particu-
This needing a lot of solitude for
larly in dark winter days. Housework
the nervously ill is, like most nervous
doesn’t usually hold enough interest
symptoms, an exaggeration of what
and small children can be demanding
most people need or experience: for
and frustrating.
example the man going off to his allot-
If you face the silence, not shrink
ment or pigeons or football and the
from it, you often think of a job that
wife to the W.I. or lampshade making,
needs doing or look out to the garden.
gardening or doing the crossword or a
In this way you can lose the fear of
puzzle.
being alone. With understanding from
The expert on nervous illness, Dr Claire Weekes, says in her book ‘The Essential Help for your Nerves’, that being alone can include housewives
Dr Weekes’ books, you may get a sense of fellowship. The best cure for loneliness is occupation among people and each must
cont.
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EQUILIBRIUM 29
EQUILIBRIUM
Summer/ Issue 38
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EQUILIBRIUM
find this in his or her own way. Don’t be
hold the interest and support the flag-
put off if you at first fail; keep trying! The
ging spirit acting as splints to a tired
mainstay of treatment for depression in
mind, rather than the lonely peace of
particular, but also the anxiety state, is
solitude. Go to the same place and
occupation in the company of others.
time each week to get into a routine
Doing something and with others takes
and create comfort zones – takes 3
your mind off yourself and your prob-
weeks. One fellow user on a mental
lems from time to time.
health course – stress management –
It is difficult for many to combat iner-
that I was on and to whom I mentioned
tia and go out; agoraphobics also have
this has several times reminded me of
the fear of going out to contend with.
the benefit of this to him when he put it
With depression and breakdown it can
into practice.
often be thought a good idea to send
When I came back from working in
Mary off to stay with Aunt Maude who
Jeddah, Saudi Arabia, I ended up in a
lives down the end of a valley, turn left
worse mess because of the home situ-
and down the far end of another valley.
ation – you go downhill fast without
The result, as Dr Weekes says, is that that
occupation which is, besides earn-
may well fix Mary but not quite the way
ing a living, why many non-ill people
you want Mary fixed!
work. It took me 3 months to get a job I
It’s often much better for a sufferer
could do after I’d turned down 3 offers
to sit with a drink inside or outside a
because of lack of confidence and
busy café or be in a library, even if the
then I went because the agency girl
sufferer isn’t interacting with anyone
said ‘come today’. I told myself if ever I
else. Brightness and diversion help to
was out of work again I’d do voluntary
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Summer/ Issue 38
work and that’s what I did when I later
& coffee in the bedroom, there’s often
got made redundant in 1987 and I’m
no residents’ lounge. Youth hostels are
still doing it!
cheaper – you don’t have to be young
To have something to get up and out for is a great help.
to stay there – and you are with others in the lounge, bedrooms, self-catering kitchen and dining areas. Visit a youth
Examples are:
hostel in London in the day-time and
•Drop-ins if you can find them.
ask a member of staff to show you
•Voluntary or part-time, or, if you can,
round the facilities, so it’s not a shock if
full-time work.
you ever decide to stay in one some-
•Exercise – keep-fit classes, gym, swim,
where.
cycling. You’re with people and can
•Pets: Having a pet for company may
often end up saying something to
be a good idea if you feel able to look
someone else even if it’s only ‘hello’.
after it. I didn’t mention it earlier, as
•If you’re of any religion there is church, I have enough trouble looking after chapel, mosque, temple or synagogue. Going to any of these gets you up and
myself! So make the effort to try and go out
out and a bit of exercise getting there.
however often you fail. The greatest
You’re with people even if you don’t
failure is the failure to make the effort
speak to them and there are often
and the only people who never fail in
refreshments afterwards when you can
anything are those who never try.
be with, speak, and get to know others.
Good Luck!
•Holidays: Guest houses and hotels can be a bit lonely as with T.V. and tea
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EQUILIBRIUM 33
British Born Indians The First Group DEV
EQUILIBRIUM EQUILIBRIUM 35
Summer/ Issue 38
A
s a person who was born in the
person of the opposite gender, then he
early 70s and raised in the 80s, I was
or she would be reported to their parents
part of an unofficial group: “bilety desi
or guardian by a community elder. The
saheb” (foreign Indian English person) or
result would be that they would get a large
“sahebabu” (English sir). These are the
telling-off and further monitoring. Suffice
names given to the first group of children
to say, this would at times go against what
that were born between 1964 and 1979
the child wanted. This meant that the child
outside of their country of origin, in South
would definitely not be allowed to meet, or
Asia. This group of people were the first
should I say mingle, with other “non-South
ones to be raised abroad. In other words,
Asian” friends.
our parents did not have a template to
A reason for this from a parental point of
follow when raising their British-born chil-
view was that they behaved in a way their
dren. The only way they could think of rais-
parents thought was inappropriate. Parents
ing this group was through the traditional
would have trouble figuring out if their child
Indian methods, but the rules back on the
was getting into trouble, causing trouble
subcontinent did not always fit into how life
or not doing what they were supposed to
worked in the Western world.
do. Most of all, they did not know where
From the point of view of someone born
this was going. From a South Asian point
in the UK, it was a clash of cultures. On
of view, the child in question would be
one hand, you had the traditional Indian
very curious about his or her roots. “Where
way of doing things (which was regulated
am I from?” “What is life like over there?”
by parents, plus any other older family
“Do I have any family there?” Should I do
members). On the other hand, there
things their way?” And so on. But from the
was the traditional English environment
point of view of an Indian born in the UK:
(or school) and socialising with western
“I was born and raised here; my ways are
friends. As children we would have our
different”. “I do things as people do things
every move monitored by our parents
here”. It is basically a clash of cultures.
and other community elders. For example,
This would be more prominent when the
if a child was found roaming the streets
child would visit their home country. Before
during lunchtime or was “friendly” with a
I go any further, I should say that people cont.
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EQUILIBRIUM EQUILIBRIUM 34
in South Asia (until 1995) would think
more Indian and less Western. The final
of us as saheb (meaning English) and
group have chosen to find a balance
would expect us to wear top hats and
between the two (i.e. when outside the
suits. Before 1995, some people were
family and Indian community, they are
brought up watching movies like Doctor Dolittle and Chitty Chitty Bang Bang or, to put it frankly, anything Victorian. In other words, they thought these sahebs were not Indian but English. On the flip side, here they would feel they were not “English”, because they come from a South Asian background. In short, they felt they were in no-man’s-land, neither here nor there. This could be classified as an identity conflict. There were some cases where the
more western, and when they are with family and in the Indian community, they are more Indian). As for South Asia, after the invention of cable TV and with more international programmes being sent back and forth to the subcontinent, the local people started to get a better knowledge of what was going on with South Asian families living abroad. Luckily, other generations have more experience of what goes on abroad.
local people had found out that an
From a personal perspective, my
Indian family had gone to visit their
behaviour and how I show my cultural
extended family in London. It was later
identity depends on where I am and
heard that they were followed around;
who I am with. This is great because in
their every move was watched. There
some ways I get the best of both worlds,
were other stories surfacing from British-
but on the other hand my identity does
born Indians that had had similar expe-
feel a bit conflicted, although this has
riences. As the years passed and this
got easier with age. As India becomes
group reached their mid-twenties, some
more Americanised, I wonder what it will
of them decided not to follow their
be like for the next generation of Indians
Indian roots. They became western-
in the UK.
ised. Some of them chose to become
EQUILIBRIUM EQUILIBRIUM 37
Summer/ Issue 38
Having a Nice Home
Missed Miscarriage
A personal experience
Kate’s Poem
ANGELA
I used to live in bedsits and did so for a long time. They are the worst properties to
Days pass in circles of grief
live in. Landlords can give you grief and
Box-sets, biscuits and tears
the other tenants can cause a lot of trou-
Time is both painful and meaningless
ble. If I cooked a nice meal and left it in the kitchen, the other tenants would eat
My knowledge of the body is improv-
it. I used to clean the communal areas
ing
until it made me feel sick, and I got no
I’m learning new words
money from the landlord for doing it. I
Things I was never taught at school
didn’t get my deposit back from my landlord, because he took my copy of the
My image of the future is changing
tenancy agreement out of my room. There
From expecting to expectant
was even a lady that made me sleep in a
Waiting for a brand new world to end
freezing cold room. I now have a council flat with central
My fears are contained and limitless
heating, a phone, a washing machine,
Hope is a dangerous necessity
a cooker, a fridge freezer, a television,
“It’s not fair” our thought refrain
and a microwave oven. What I like best about my flat is the central heating; it is
Days pass in spirals and stutters
nice to come home to a lovely warm flat.
Cups of tea, soup, dirty dishes
I remember the days when the flat was
Waiting for a life that never started
always freezing cold. The public telephone
To end.
boxes were usually out of order, so it is so convenient to have my own phone. I believe that having a nice home is good for your mental health and wellbeing.
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EQUILIBRIUM EQUILIBRIUM 36
Phrases Angela
Here is a list of phrases. Some of them
A cloud is not a positive thing, as it
funny and some are educational.
means rain might be coming, but some-
I am going to spend a penny A long time ago you use to have to pay 1p use a toilet in a train station. It is now 20p most places, but the phrase has carried on.
Every cloud has a silver lining
Photo: Anthony
EQUILIBRIUM EQUILIBRIUM 38
thing positive can come out of something negative (like the sun coming out behind the clouds).
Too many cooks spoil the broth I say, as a Jamaican woman, two Caribbean women cannot cook the same Caribbean chicken in the same kitchen!
Summer/ Issue 38
Where there is muck there is brass Brass is a slang term for money, implying that if you are doing some kind of illegal trade you are making as lot of money, e.g. drug dealing.
The four corners of the world They use to think that the world was
do that. The English version is: You don’t know when you’re lucky.
Two heads are better than one If you are trying to sort out a problem it is better to do it with somebody.
Great minds think alike.
flat in a square shape. It is actually
I like when somebody supports my
round, so I don’t understand why
idea.
people are not upside down in the Australian Soap Neighbours! I think
Out of the frying pan and into the fire
each corner of the world can be
This means do not go into a situation
represented by a different sauce:
which is going to be a problem.
Mustard from England, Barbecue from the USA, Sweet Chilli from India, and
The pot is calling the kettle black
Sweet and Sour from China. All deli-
The first kettle and pots were made
cious!
of a metal that turn black when you
The cow does not know the use of its tail until it’s cut off This is a Jamaican saying. I hope you
have used it for a long time. This phrases means you should not criticise someone when you have the same problem.
are not eating something. When the flies go onto the cow’s bottom, it moves the tail to make the flies go away. It doesn’t have a tail, it can’t
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EQUILIBRIUM EQUILIBRIUM 39
SMOKING
and mental health Naomi
A
larming new research: One in three UK
1974. For those with mental health conditions
cigarettes smoked by mental health
though, the statistics are not being mirrored.
sufferers
The UK has witnessed a decrease
Action on Smoking & Health (ASH) found that 38% of those with a mental health prob-
in smoking, with just 19% of the population
lem reported smoking daily, and a further
labelling themselves as smokers, as opposed
13% as smoking less frequently. One third of
to 21% 2 years ago, and an alarming 45% in
the tobacco in the UK is smoked by individu-
EQUILIBRIUM EQUILIBRIUM 40-
Summer/ Issue 38
als with a mental health condition. The
should be supported, but the culture of
more severe one’s mental health condi-
smoking in patient’s units prevails, with
tion, the more likely they are to smoke,
60% ex-patients reported cases of smoking
and to smoke more heavily.
indoors, despite a ban of smoking inside
However, it is not that those with a mental
patient units in 2008.
health condition have no desire to quit, in fact, 80% cited making attempts to quit, and 36% cited a constant desire to quit. This population faces more barriers to overcome and so requires more support to quit. Despite having contact with mental health professionals, support to quit is at present, inadequate, and it is clearly not being prioritised.
Why Are Stats Among This Population So High? Smokers with mental health conditions gave reasons for smoking:
•Coping mechanism •Anxiety relief •Self-medication •sociability
ASH conducted two surveys. One on mental health professionals, and another
Nicotine, when smoked, can lead to
on mental health patients. It aimed to
the smoker to feel more relaxed, and is
uncover links between mental health and
consequently used as a self-medicator,
smoking. It discovered:
and stress relieving tool. However, this is a vicious cycle. The brain quickly gets used
•38% cited smoking daily •A further 13% smoked less regularly •36% smoke between 11-20 cigarettes per day.
•10% started smoking in hospital.
to the stream of dopamine which is being stimulated from the nicotine. Their brain responds with cravings and heightened stress, which is relieved only with more nicotine. “When one is having a mental health
Such individuals are trapped in a cycle of attempts to quit, and relapses. It is clear that these individuals with a desire to quit
crisis, the worst thing you can do is give them more stress by forcing them to give up smoking, it is often a coping mechanism”, said a
cont.
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EQUILIBRIUM EQUILIBRIUM 41
woman who smokes every day, has Asperger
Our clients have such complex and multi-
Syndrome and has had an inpatient experi-
ple problems and the focus for me is on
ence.
their mental health and also social circum-
Are Staff Not Prioritising Smoking? A number of patient smokers reported
stances, e.g. debts, homelessness, isolation, drug and alcohol problems. There is also the important goal of devel-
not being advised to quit. Further results
oping a strong therapeutic relationship
from the ASH report revealed that 43% of
and collaborative goals. Smoking is usually
patients were not spoken to about quitting
not the top priority.
smoking, and if they had been, 37% were
When I run groups, most clients go out to
offered nothing and 23% weren’t advised
smoke in the breaks. They wouldn’t neces-
to quit. Only one fifth were offered some
sarily welcome me running out after them
support. Those staff who offered support
to talk about smoking cessation’, said
were twice as likely to have undergone
Clare, psychologist.
cessation training compared to those who hadn’t. “That due to home circumstances and the recent increase of medication I was advised not to quit until things had settled down.” One man who has experienced depression, said:
Looking to the Future Increased support for E-cigarettes: Many of quitting methods exist out there - Staff should be trained in smoking cessation,• More research should be carried out within this area
“Agreed I should stop trying to give up until
•Barriers to quit smoking services should be
I had managed to access psychotherapy”
addressed
However, more mental health workers are undergoing smoking cessation training: “We have recently undergone smoking training cessation, which was really useful, and I do think to ask now. The biggest
•Staff should be pointed to quit smoking services, if they smoke themselves.
•Ensure harm-reduction programmes are in position for those who are unable or unwilling to give up smoking.
challenge before was remembering to ask.
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Summer/ Issue 38
Kate Fox www.haringey.gov.uk/equilibrium
EQUILIBRIUM EQUILIBRIUM 43
Bluebird Care Bluebird Care introduces pioneering real-time technology app to make customer care even better Nathan Hartley
An award-winning Haringey care
them and their families more inde-
provider has gone mobile and invested
pendence and comfort in their own
heavily in a pioneering new app to
homes.
enable all of its staff to provide a
Staff work across a large geographical
cutting-edge level of care.
area covering the whole of the London
Borough of Haringey.
Bluebird Care Haringey is giving
every member of staff access to the new PASSsystem app on their mobile devices.
The organisation provides at-home
care for anyone, from adults with physical disabilities to the elderly, to give
Now every single carer is receiving
training in an innovative and technologically advanced way of making sure customers receive the most up-to-date and accurate level of care with the introduction of The PASSsystem from everyLife Technologies.
EQUILIBRIUM 20
EQUILIBRIUM EQUILIBRIUM 38 44
Summer/ Issue 38
Director of Bluebird Care Haringey,
Life Technologies, said:‘We created the
Jyoti Kohli, said: ‘The PASSsystem is a
PASSsystem to help care workers manage
mobile app, which every member of staff
their visits. Our Care Support Software is
now has on their mobile phone. When our
intuitive and helpful. We believe it can
carers are out and about and have seen
help care companies make business-
a customer, they will use the app on-the-
transforming efficiencies and offer
go, wherever they are in the borough to
peace-of-mind care delivery reporting.
log what has happened during their visit.
Care Quality Commission Inspectors
have reported it as making the differ-
Other carers can then access this
information, wherever they are, and will
ence between a ‘good’ and ‘outstand-
know exactly what to do when they visit.
ing’ level of care. We are delighted to
The password protected information can
be working alongside Bluebird Care, who
also be accessed and updated from the
have a demonstrable level of achiev-
head offices instantly if we receive infor-
ing the very best for their customers and
mation about a customer’s condition.
families.’
This will save time, meaning we can
spend more time with customers, provide
For more details contact Bluebird Care
a constantly up-to-date health record
by calling 020 8801 3330, emailing harin-
and enable us to share best practice.
gey@bluebirdcare.co.uk, or by visiting
We are thrilled to be able to introduce
their website at www.bluebirdcare.co.uk/
this system and are sure it will improve our
haringey
service even further.
Customers are also able to log-in, at
anytime, to assess and keep up-to-date with the real-time information about the care of their loved one.’
Hannah Montgomery, from every-
Contact: Jyoti Kohli, Bluebird Care Haringey Managing Director, 020 8801 3330.
EQUILIBRIUM 21
www.haringey.gov.uk/equilibrium
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