Aspire Magazine - April/May 2014 - Authentic Living: The Path to Inner Freedom by Aspire Magazine

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CONTENTS On the Cover

Stacey Martino Meet Aspire expert relationship columnist and Love and Passion Coach Stacey Martino in this inspiring interview. Stacey helps people who feel stuck, frustrated and helpless with the challenges of intimate relationship. Through strategic private coaching, programs and events for her Relationship Transformation System™, individuals learn to use her proven strategies and tools to create an unshakable love and unleashed passion that lasts a lifetime. Cover Photo Credit: Lindsay Musser www.EncompassPhotography.net

APRIL | MAY 2014

AUTHENTIC LIVING: THE PATH TO INNER FREEDOM

Wisdom & Self-Growth 20 AUTHENTIC LIVING: A MOMENT BY MOMENT PRACTICE by Christy Whitman Authenticity is simply the experience of being connected to ourselves – to our feelings, thoughts and the subtle ways in which our energy shifts from moment to moment – while at the same time being connected with another. To live authentically is to experience a seamless flow between ourselves and those we are with; to allow another’s experience of the moment to enhance our own experience of it, and vice versa.

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24 9 AUTHENTIC CREATION TIPS FOR DIVINE FEMININE LEADERS by Lisa Michaels Uncovering the truth about creating your authentic dreams, desires, and purpose isn’t easy. Cultural training runs deep in the psyche. The programing to fit in, follow the crowd, and not make waves begins early with sit still, be quiet, don’t talk back, and stop dancing around. Slowly the impulse to express yourself gets drowned out and overtaken by “be nice, play safe, and follow the rules.” No wonder it takes time for women to take the lid off those old messages and start the deep inner digging to reveal their distinctive soul truth. Here are 9 authentic creation tips to support your journey to authentic living.

CONTENTS

28 SIMPLY EMPOWERED... WHY DID I LET YOU DULL MY SHINE? by Crystal Andrus Leading women’s empowerment coach Crystal Andrus shares her intimate experience of how one woman’s judgment brought up layers of self-doubt and old selfsabotaging behaviors. Crystal shares her experience to remind women to never ‘dull their shine’ in order to be loved and accepted for who they are.

“We have to dare to be ourselves, however frightening or strange that self may prove to be.” MAY SARTON

32 THE REAL SECRET TO THE EMPOWERED LIFE by Cathleen O’Connor The incredible power of choice lies within you, and it is choice that gives you the opportunity to create the empowered life, one that is a true reflection of the many aspects of who you are. As you make conscious choices you will find that life shifts around you. You move out of victimization and into self-actualization and when you take the time to discover what you truly need and want you can then create the rich and fulfilling life you deserve.

35 WHAT IS YOUR SOUL LANGUAGE? by Jennifer Urezzio For centuries, people have been searching to find out who they really are, why they are here, and what it all means. Soul Language gives us the insight and the tools to answer these questions in an accessible, relatable way. By understanding our Soul Languages, we can listen more closely to our inner wisdom, expand our awareness, and enjoy our lives. Jennifer, the creator of the Soul Language shares the three categories of Soul Language.

CONTENTS Health & Wellness 40 LIVING THE GODDESS LIFESTYLE: THE MODERN DAY GODDESS’ GUIDE TO A MAGICAL SPRINGTIME by Lisa Marie Rosati Life is magic. When you choose to look at life through a magical lens… life becomes a joyful, interesting and pleasure-filled adventure of EPIC proportions. There are quite a few ways to connect with the magic of life and in this empowering article manifestation expert Lisa Marie shares some tips including one of the easiest ways to get connected – aligning with the flow of nature.ain’t nobody’s business!

“The privilege of a lifetime is to become who you truly are.” C.G. JUNG

43 LEARNING TO WORK WITH THE EBB AND FLOW OF YOUR MENSTRUAL CYCLE by Mary E. Pritchard, Ph.D.

As a woman you have a power no man will ever possess: the power to give life. Each time you bleed, this is your body’s way of clearing out the old to prepare to bring life again. Even if you have no desire to have children, your cycle is still an incredible gift meant to be honored. Learn to work with the ebb and flow of your hormones throughout your monthly cycle and as you do you’ll find yourself embracing it as the gift that it is.

46 EMPATHIC ILLNESS: DO YOU ABSORB OTHER PEOPLE’S SYMPTOMS? by Judith Orloff, M.D. As a woman you have a power no man will ever possess: the power to give life. Each time you bleed, this is your body’s way of clearing out the old to prepare to bring life again. Even if you have no desire to have children, your cycle is still an incredible gift meant to be honored. Learn to work with the ebb and flow of your hormones throughout your monthly cycle and as you do you’ll find yourself embracing it as the gift that it is. 50 THE WISE WOMAN WAY: LEADING AN AUTHENTIC LIFE by Susun S. Weed What is an authentic life? Wise Woman Susun Weed shares her insights on living authentically, changing the story we tell ourselves and lovingly walks you through a Shamanic Process to bring you closer to your authentic self.

CONTENTS 53 STOP AND APPRECIATE THE MOMENT by Dr. Cynthia Thaik When you step back and slow things down in your life, you are actually allowing your body to renew and regenerate itself. This allows your bodily systems to function better, aids in the elimination of harmful toxins, and conserves valuable energy that your body could be using to fight off internal and external pathogens. Renowned Harvardtrained cardiologist shares 5 tips to help you slow down and take care of your heart, body, mind and spirit.

“The authentic self is soul made visible.” SARAH BAN BREATHNACH

Relationships 58 INTERVIEW WITH LOVE AND PASSION COACH STACEY MARTINO by Linda Joy Aspire Magazine is honored to introduce you to Love and Passion Coach Stacey Martino, Aspire’s Expert Relationship Columnist. Stacey helps people who feel stuck, frustrated and helpless with the challenges of intimate relationship. Through strategic private coaching, programs and events for her Relationship Transformation System™, individuals learn to use her proven strategies and tools to create an unshakable love and unleashed passion that lasts a lifetime. Stacey firmly believes that it does NOT take two to tango, that one person can significantly shift the dynamics of the relationship. Trained and certified by Tony Robbins and Cloe Madanes, Stacey is a certified marriage educator and divorce preventionist.

64 TRANSFORMING YOUR RELATIONSHIP: LOVE IS NOT ALL THERE IS! by Stacey Martino Love and Passion Coach, Stacey Martino teaches us how to put an end to the false beliefs responsible for more broken hearts (and homes) than anything else. Learn why love and passion are not enough to sustain a magnificent relationship that lasts a lifetime. 70 CHOREOGRAPH YOUR SACRED LIFE by Shann Vander Leek In Choreograph Your Sacred Life, Transformation Goddess, Shann Vander Leek share how you can experience your life in a beauty way. Do want to consciously create your one precious life? This article will help you gain clarity and design the life of your dreams.

CONTENTS

“Everything will line up perfectly when knowing and living the truth becomes more important than looking good.” ALAN COHEN

Career | Business 74 DOING BUSINESS LIKE A GODDESS: SETTING GOALS AND BOUNDARIES THAT HONOR YOUR FEMININE by Elizabeth Purvis As part of a special series over the last year, Elizabeth has been sharing her key concepts for doing business like a goddess. This is the sixth and final

key concept completing this powerful series. The sixth key focuses on setting goals and boundaries that honor your feminine and includes 5 power tips to set empowered, soulsupportive goals that pull you forward in life and in business.

78 MINDSET: THE INNER PROFIT GAME FOR BUSINESS SUCCESS by Jeanna Gabellini When it comes to profits, mindset always trumps strategy. When you practice cultivating an abundant mindset your profits will grow while your heart glows from the connection you feel to your team, clients and tribe. Abundance must be your internal vibration in order to produce it in your outer world. Master Business Coach Jeanna Gabellini shares empowering tips on how to shift your mindset from lack to abundance as well as some inspired action tips to manifest your revenue goals in the next two weeks.

82 EMBRACE YOUR AUTHENTIC SELF IN LIFE AND BUSINESS by Maryellen De Vine Authenticity is so important if you are an entrepreneur. How will your perfect clients ever know that you are perfect for them if you water yourself down? Let them feel your true essence. That’s what they will be attracted to most. Yes, your expertise and services will be of value, but there are probably many others out there offering the same thing. However, only you do it the way you do; with your own spin on it; with your essence infused into it. Here are a few ways to bring authenticity into your business.

CONTENTS

85 ALIGNING WITH UNIVERSAL LAWS FOR YOUR HIGHLY CONSCIOUS BUSINESS by Jennifer Longmore There is a divine energy that moves through you AND your business, and when you learn how to activate it, channel it, and accelerate it, particularly in your business, it will create results beyond your wildest imagination. Jennifer shares the Universal Laws including the Law of Abundance, Law of Action, Law of Manifestation and others and steps to align with each of these Universal Laws to achieve quantum leaps in your highly conscious business and experience success and prosperity beyond what you could have even imagined.

“Don’t think you’re on the right road just because it’s a well-beaten path.” UNKNOWN

89 INSPIRED TO WRITE? OPEN UP TO LIFE AND WRITING by Lisa Tener A powerful place to reconnect with your authentic self is through writing. National Book Coach Lisa Tener shares three different tools for discovering your voice as a writer and—in the process—getting in touch with your authentic self.

LINDA JOY

Publisher & Editor-In-Chief | Linda@aspiremag.net

Creative & Brand Direction || RACHEL DUNHAM | www.HummingbirdCreativeConcepts.com Editorial Layout || MANDY GATES | www.GruveDesign.com Graphic Designer || MANDY GATES | www.GruveDesign.com COO || KIM TURCOTTE | www.SoulPurposeBusinessSolutions.com MAILING ADDRESS || P.O. BOX 1149 | LAKEVILLE, MA 02347 | 508.265.7929 ADVERTISING || Email Linda@aspiremag.net MISSION TO INSPIRE INFO <CLICK HERE>

Do You Want the Most Effective & Secret Tools for More Fulfillment in Life? Go to: yourpowerbreakthrough.com Download your Free Audio instantly: “My Powerful Guided Meditation: to Soothe, Calm and Center Yourself for Your Goals Ahead.”

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EXPERT COLUMNISTS STACEY MARTINO

LISA MARIE ROSATI

Stacey Martino helps people who feel stuck, frustrated and helpless with the challenges of intimate relationship. Through strategic private coaching, programs and events for her Relationship Transformation System™, individuals learn to use her proven strategies and tools to create an unshakable love and unleashed passion that lasts a lifetime. Stacey firmly believes that it does NOT take two to tango, that one person can significantly shift the dynamics of the relationship. Trained and certified by Tony Robbins and Cloe Madanes, Stacey is a certified marriage educator and divorce preventionist. Click Here for Articles www.LoveandPassionCoach.com

Passionista Lisa Marie Rosati is an Inner Goddess Catalyst for women and the Creatrix of The Goddess Lifestyle Plan. Lisa mentors women on how become a Modern Day Goddess by consciously designing a luscious Goddess life, cultivating radiant health and creating a lucrative business using and directing their feminine fire. www.GoddessLifestylePlan.com www.sugarfreegoddess.com

CRYSTAL ANDRUS

LISA TENER

Crystal Andrus is a leader in the field of selfdiscovery and personal transformation. From a tough beginning—she has risen to become a best-selling Hay House author, international speaker, women’s health advocate, spokesperson for Haylo Health, and Founder of The SWAT Institute. Crystal’s message is one of resilience, strength and inner power. www.CrystalAndrus.com www.SWATInstitute.com

An award-winning authority on writing and publishing books, Lisa Tener guides you to joyfully express yourself in writing. She blogs for the Huffington Post, serves on the faculty of Harvard Medical School’s publishing course, and teaches her own Award Winning Book Writing Courses in person and by interactive teleseminar. www.LisaTener.com

Transforming Your Relationship

Simply... Empowered!

Living the Goddess LifeStyleTM

Inspired to Write?

ELIZABETH PURVIS

SUSUN WEED

Elizabeth Purvis shows spirit-led, missiondriven women how to price, package and market their services so they create extraordinary income and impact. Known for blending heart-centered sales, Internet marketing, spiritual principles and Universal Law, Elizabeth delivers simple ways for her clients to double or triple revenues by creating multiple streams of income and enrolling ideal clients at higher fees. www.MarketingGoddess.com

Susun Weed is an internationally renowned herbalist, author, and director of the Wise Woman Center in New York. She is a revered voice of the Wise Woman Tradition, where women’s bodies and women’s emotions are valued. Susun is a founding grandmother of the herbal renaissance and the originator of the concept of complementary medicine. www.SusunWeed.com

Doing Business Like a Goddess

The Wise Woman Way

FEATURED CONTRIBUTORS

JUDITH ORLOFF, M.D.

CHRISTY WHITMAN

JEANNA GABELLINI

JENNIFER LONGMORE

LISA MICHAELS

MARY E. PRITCHARD, PH. D., HHC

SHANN VANDER LEEK

MARYELLEN DE VINE

DR. CYNTHIA THAIK

JENNIFER UREZZIO

CATHLEEN O’CONNOR

YOUR WISDOM! WITH OUR READERS

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LETTER EDITOR

FROM THE

”Authenticity is a collection of choices that we have to make every day. It’s about the choice to show up and be real. The choice to be honest. The choice to let our true selves be seen.” BRENÉ BROWN

Welcome to the April/May 2014 Authentic Living: The Path to Inner Freedom! The path of feminine liberation is a courageous journey adorned with a rich tapestry meaningful experiences. Heart-centered women are learning to let go of what no longer serves them while learning how to fully receive their inner freedom. When we listen to the still small voice within us, we can experience the joy of living an authentic life. I believe we all yearn to live authentically, without masks and labels, and be loved and accepted for the truth of who we are. Throughout this wisdom-filled issue you’ll discover the tips, tools and resources to support you in embracing your authentic self. As contributor Christy Whitman shares in her empowering article Authentic Living: A Moment by Moment Practice, “Authenticity is

Connect with me! om/ http://www.Facebook.c lindajoyinspires

simply the experience of being connected to ourselves – to our feelings, thoughts and the subtle ways in which our energy shifts from moment to moment – while at the same time being connected with another.”

Grab a cup of tea or a glass of wine and enjoy the powerful articles, empowering wisdom and supportive resources offered by our expert columnist and featured guest contributors.

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LINDA JOY Publisher & Editor-In-Chief | Linda@aspiremag.net

Here’s What I’m Reading Right Now...

FROM MY BOOKSHELF

The 21-Day Consciousness Cleanse: A Breakthrough Program for Connecting with Your Soul’s Deepest Purpose By Debbie Ford I was called to pull out one of my all-time favorite books by the late Debbie Ford and am so happy I followed my intuition. Just as our bodies need to experience physical cleansings in order to run at optimal health and energy so do our spiritual and emotional centers. Love it!

WISDOM & SELF-GROWTH

“As you become more aligned

with the truth of who you are, the question of liking yourself goes away. It is a natural state of being .”

Rachel Archelaus

The Law of Attraction:

Read Online!

ncy BY MARGARET PAUL, PH.D. e u q e r F t u o b A ’s It

Many of us have heard of the Law of Attraction – that like attracts like. However, many are confused about what this really means.

In my experience, like attracts like means that like frequency attracts like frequency. My high frequency attracts the things I want and my low frequency attracts the things I don’t want. The question then becomes, what raises or lowers frequency? Here are four tips to raise your

frequency:

tive Posi ing k Thin

Love

Read the full article online.

l Live & Virtua

UPCOMING EVENTS

Fresh, Whole ul Peacef nt e Foods nm Enviro

CHECK OUT MORE ONLINE!

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INSPIRED LIVING GIVEAWAY: RESOURCES FOR MASTERING THE ART OF LIVING || DETAILS! 100+ Free Transformational Gifts BE LOVED FOR YOUR MOST AUTHENTIC SELF || DETAILS! Free call with Publisher Linda Joy & Special Guest Stacey Martino

AUTHENTIC LIVING:

A Moment BY Moment PRACTICE BY CHRISTY WHITMAN

“What I am is good enough – if I would only be it openly.” – CARL ROGERS

hen Linda invited me to contribute to this month’s issue on Authentic Living, I was instantly reminded of the above quote, given to us by the late humanistic psychologist, Carl Rogers. To me, these words embody the very essence of what it means to live authentically. Authenticity is simply the experience of being connected to ourselves – to our feelings, thoughts and the subtle ways in which our energy shifts from moment to moment – while at the same time being connected with another. To live authentically is to experience a seamless flow between ourselves and those we are with; to allow another’s experience of the moment to enhance our own experience of it, and vice versa. Authenticity is the basis of connectedness and intimacy, and is a prerequisite to getting into the vibration of “flow” that we feel in those experiences and relationships in our lives that are truly exceptional and evolutionary.

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Now, are there times when having the ability to “step out” of ourselves is necessary in order to empathize with and attend to someone in need? Yes, of course. If you’ve ever been a caretaker of another person – an aging parent or a young child, for example – you understand that this is, at times, the most compassionate and appropriate action we can take. The problem arises when we devote more of our emotional, physical, intuitive, or creative energy to another than we devote to ourselves, because that’s the point at which we begin to compromise our own authentic needs for the sake of someone else’s. And the moment we allow someone else’s happiness to dictate when it is and is not okay to be authentically ourselves, this slippery slope gets even more slippery. Of course, we don’t “learn” the art of compromising our authenticity in the same way we learn arithmetic. No one sits us down one day

and says, “Listen. You need to make yourself invisible when Daddy gets home, or he will get angry and none of us will feel safe.” It’s unlikely that anyone told us in so many words, “Hey. You are not allowed to be the one who shines, because in this family, your sister (or brother) is the shiny one.” And yet, messages like these still come through loud and clear, and we absorb them all the same. When these kind of conditions on our authenticity, formed in childhood, go unidentified and unchallenged, we drag them into virtually relationship in our adult lives. We learn to subjugate our needs for the needs of others. We become people pleasers. We repeatedly find ourselves feeling like a victim. There are countless ways to relinquish our authenticity, but the path to reclaiming it begins with a single realization: We are all born with the intrinsic right to be completely and authentically ourselves, without pretense or

There are countless ways to relinquish our authenticity, but the path to reclaiming it begins with a single realization: We are all born with the intrinsic right to be completely and authentically ourselves, without pretense or posturing – and we alone have the power to grant or to deny ourselves this fundamental right.

WISDOM & SELF-GROWTH

In theory at least, authenticity seems like something that should come about as easily and naturally as breathing – and it does, to some extent, when we’re young. In fact, if you ever want to see a shining example of what it is to be fully and authentically connected in the moment, just watch a young child at play. Unless the child is insecurely attached to one or both parents, what you’ll see is a human being engaged with Life without barriers, limitations or emotional walls diminishing the fullness of his or her experience. But at some point in our development, as our awareness expands to include not only our own experience but also that of the significant others in our lives, we learn a skill that can be beneficial in the short term, but highly detrimental if it becomes a habit: We learn to disconnect from our own experience of what’s happening inside of us in order to connect with and meet the needs of those around us.

posturing – and we alone have the power to grant or to deny ourselves this fundamental right. To permit ourselves to be authentically who and how we are is to place ourselves in the driver’s seat of our own experience. It is to have the awareness and the willingness

“To permit ourselves to be authentically who and how we are is to place ourselves in the driver’s seat of our own experience.” to listen to ourselves, to renegotiate relationships and situations that no longer serve us, and to become willing to ask for what we want and need in each changing situation. Authentic Living is a momentby-moment practice. It’s learning to listen to that “still small voice within,” and to pay attention to the subtle energies of ease or tension; of excitement or apprehension that arise in response to each evolving area of our lives. It’s learning first how to distinguish our inner “YESes” and inner “NOs,” and then expressing those preferences responsibly and clearly. On a very practical level, authenticity is having the courage to say, “You know, it feels like that is going to be too much for me tonight” – and to negotiate until we find an option that feels better and more nurturing. It’s to redirect our focus, so that instead of considering first what we think will make others happy and bending ourselves to comply with that, to look first inside ourselves, to see what feels good for

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us. Authenticity is more than just the key to our own happiness and high-self esteem; it’s also the doorway for true connectedness and intimacy with another. I think of Authentic Living as a kind of internal allegiance we pledge to our inner being, which we commit to upholding regardless of what’s going on in our outer world. It’s a pledge to remain anchored in our own bodies, in our own energy field, and in our own source of wellbeing. For me, daily meditation is the key to living authentically, because it takes me beyond the superficial thoughts and judgments generated in the mind and into a direct feeling experience of what is actually happening within me. For some women, getting out into the quiet of nature may be the key that helps them get connected and stay connected when life gets busy or chaotic. Whatever the key is for you, the best news of all is that you don’t need to search for it anywhere except within yourself. The door to your authentic self doesn’t open from the outside in, Read but from the inside out. Online! Christy Whitman – A New York Times Bestselling Author of Taming Your Alpha Bitch: How To Be Fierce and Feminine (and Get Everything You Want!), CEO and founder of the Quantum Success Coaching AcademyTM, a 12-month Law of Attraction coaching certification program, and creator of the Enlightened Kid Program. Christy’s life-changing message reaches over 100,000 people a month and she has been seen on The Today Show, The Morning Show and The Marilyn Dennis Show in Canada. She has been quoted in Seventeen, Woman’s World, Woman’s Day, Teen Vogue, People Magazine, Hollywood Life, and Knot Magazine. As a certified Law of Attraction coach, her work has been promoted by and featured with best-selling authors like Marianne Williamson, Dr. Wayne Dyer, Marci Shimoff,. She currently lives in Montreal with her husband, Frederic, and their two boys, Alexander and Maxim. Meet her at www.ChristyWhitman.com and www.7EssentialLaws.com.

AUTHENTIC CREATION TIPS

for

Divine

Feminine

Leaders BY LISA MICHAELS

ncovering the truth about creating your authentic dreams, desires, and purpose isn’t easy. Cultural training runs deep in the psyche. The programing to fit in, follow the crowd, and not make waves begins early with sit still, be quiet, don’t talk back, and stop dancing around. Slowly the impulse to express yourself gets drowned out and overtaken by “be nice, play safe, and follow the rules.” No wonder it takes time for women to take the lid off those old messages and start the deep inner digging to reveal their distinctive soul truth. It takes the alchemy of experience to show you what no longer serves your essence expression so you can take a stand as the authentic leader of your own life and business. Years of coaching women, along with my own personal journey as a Divine Feminine

www.AspireMAG.net | April / May 2014

1 Listen to your inner guidance.

open to receive insights. There are many faces of the Divine Feminine from cultures all over the world. Each brings her unique gifts and perspective. Depending on the strengths and guidance you need, you can call on the earth mother Gaia, Mother Mary, Isis, Saraswati, Tara, Hecate, Brigid, or any other Goddess. These expressions of the Divine Feminine can bring you insights for any issue in life or business.

You can find yourself propelled into the leadership of your own life at any age. Sometimes women start early, but for others, they find themselves following the rules of the world around them for many years before they start tuning into the frustrations and discontent that ultimately guides them to their inner knowing. One of the simplest ways is listen to and connect with your inner guidance is to sit in silence and write in a journal. Ask yourself questions about what is genuinely true for you in any situation you are facing. Write your responses. You’ll be amazed at the layers of awareness that will be revealed in this process.

Nature’s calming and healing energy help you align with your own inner nature, which balances you vibrationally, thus maximizing your capacity to handle the stresses of our increasingly technology-filled world. Not only does nature harmonize your energy field, but her fundamental principles increase your wisdom and teach you about your life.

Connect to the Divine Feminine within.

Make friends with the Elemental Forces.

A direct connection to the Divine within brings profound insights. Including your feminine essence helps you draw on the ancient source of feminine power that flows through your veins. Any time you need support or guidance, ask for a direct connection to the Divine Feminine within and

Nature’s core energies of Earth, Water, Air, Fire, and Spirit, along with their rhythmic cycles, can actively help you create more authentic success in life. Because these energies collectively form the foundational essence of creation, they can accelerate any creational endeavor you’re involved in. When

Align with the creation energy of nature.

WISDOM & SELF-GROWTH

leader, have shown me certain patterns that women uniquely face when they choose to authentically create their lives and businesses. Here are 9 authentic creation tips that will support your journey.

nature’s energies and rhythms are honored as the profound teachers and guides they are, they readily bring assistance and clarity to boost your capacity to create success in your life. Your body is created from all of the elements. Therefore, you are intimately connected to them and have access to their wisdom at all times. All you need to do to access this powerful assistance is to ask for it with a grateful heart and be open to receiving.

5 Spend time in nature. This one thing will help ground and center you emotionally faster than anything as you strengthen your authentic feminine leadership. Go for a gratitude walk. Spending 10-20 minutes outside moving in nature, and focusing on anything you’re grateful for, will balance your mind, emotions, body, and spirit. Open to receive the messages of the elements.

6 Trust in change. Change exists as the core energy of nature. Transformations happen constantly, with every element, and in every realm. The sun and moon, while consistent in their rising and setting every day, change times, location, distance, and influence the changes we experience in the seasons and tides. As Earth’s seasons turn and change, you learn from nature that your life, too, follows this same rhythm of constant transformation.

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CHANGE EXISTS AS THE CORE ENERGY OF NATURE. TRANSFORMATIONS HAPPEN CONSTANTLY, WITH EVERY ELEMENT, AND IN EVERY REALM. Sometimes the shift in life from one thing to another expresses in a subtle and gradual change, and sometimes it is quick and imposing. Yet the undercurrent of motion keeps the energy turning.

7 Allow organic transformation. Organic transformation is a natural process of change. Organic means the inherent or inborn makeup of a thing. Trans means to go to the other side, over, across, or through. Formation is the shape, outline, or configuration of anything. Quite often our organic transformation looks like a natural disaster to us initially, and later we see the magic that has occurred. The transformation works its way through you in a way that is so all-encompassing, there is no way to know or understand what the end result will be beforehand. To transform gracefully, you need to learn to let go of what was, allow change to happen, and do your best to not fight the process. It is here you learn greater levels of trust. Stepping into your authentic leadership, you’ll be

8 Stop your inner tug-of-war and expand your consciousness container. One of the core problems I see women struggling with all the time is thinking they need to choose between being of service to the world and making money. Instead of choosing between these two things, why not expand your capacity to effectively hold both at once? When you expand your consciousness container, you’re able to tune into how you can make money by being of service. Notice when you feel a need to choose between one way of being and another. Ask yourself if you need to allow your inner tug-of-war to dissolve by expanding your container to hold both ways of being in your consciousness.

Keep your thoughts uplifted. Be mindful of where your thoughts are focused, and if you find them centered on fear, bring them back to gratitude. Find anything you can to be grateful for, even something tiny, and focus on that until your emotional energy also resets. Gratitude brings the highest vibrational frequency from which to authentically thrive. The more you give yourself the gift of getting to know your deepest thoughts and feelings the easier it is to draw on your inner wisdom any time you need to access it. Creation decisions flow effortlessly from Read your Divine Feminine leadership Online! when you are centered in your authenticity. Lisa Michaels - Author and creation coach Lisa Michaels teaches conscious alignment with nature to help visionary women dynamically increase their intuition and creation abilities. Her products and trainings have helped thousands successfully propel their personal and business lives forward. Download your free “Creation Secrets” starter kit today at http://lisa-michaels.com

“Be mindfu l of where thoughts a your re focused, a nd if you find them centered o n fear, brin them back g to gratitud e.” Lisa M ichaels

WISDOM & SELF-GROWTH

learning to trust the processes your body, mind, feelings, energy, spirit and life moves through as you claim your inner feminine wisdom.

SIMPLY

Empowered!

Why did I let you

DULL My

SHINE? BY CRYSTAL ANDRUS

o it happened! Exactly what I’ve been afraid would happen.

I recently posted some new photos on Facebook that my 17-year-old daughter (a budding new make-up artist and photographer) took of me. Truth be told, I’ve been stepping back into my “Woman Energy” over the past few months – really getting my “Mo-Jo” back — and I wanted some new pictures to reflect where I’m at now. When we first began the photo shoot, I was quite posed and poised. Covered and proper. My daughter lowered her camera and said, “You look unhappy. Too serious. That’s

www.AspireMAG.net | April / May 2014

not who you are. We need to capture the Real You.” (God, I love my kids!) So we pumped up the tunes and I started dancing around, having fun with her. Like the proud Momma Bear that I am – both for my daughter’s accomplishment and for my own (I really had fun!), I posted my new shots. After a bunch of lovely comments (almost all from women — and certainly nothing sexual or inappropriate from men), a woman who I don’t even know writes this comment on my personal Facebook page: “I’m very disappointed to see you post this sexy picture of yourself.”

“Wow…this is exactly why I was afraid to shine.” The old me would have felt ashamed, maybe even embarrassed. I might have pulled the picture down and convinced myself that women need me to be frumpy and chubby in order for me to do “healing work” in the world (a.k.a. my “Mother Energy”). Instead, I sent her a private message that said, “Since you find me to be too sexual and exploitative, perhaps we shouldn’t be friends.” I then “unfriended” her. (I would never have done that in the good ole days!! Ever! In fact, I would have believed her.)

This is the photo I posted that she thought was too sexy…

I won’t hold myself back to please anyone else, especially some judgmental woman whom I don’t even know.

WISDOM & SELF-GROWTH

I then looked at all my posts and my pictures and thought:

Truth be told, since that happened, I’ve been subtly self-sabotaging. My daily workouts dropped to maybe two this last week. I drank a little more wine than normal, and I indulged in more “treats.” Sure, I tried to convince myself it was because I had an extraneous workload and so many dinner meetings out; not to mention, it was Valentine’s Day.

But I don’t think that’s true. I was lying to myself. “I let you dull my shine, lady.” I’m sure it was unconscious “stuff” that was coming up. My fear that if I shine too brightly women won’t like me. Be good but not too good. Smile and be happy but not too happy. And please, cover your shoulders!! The good news is I’m drinking my hot water with lemon and raw honey this morning, and I’m just getting ready to climb on my treadmill. Lesson learned. Thank you. I won’t hold myself back to please anyone

else, especially some judgmental woman whom I don’t even know.

As Marianne Williamson said it so beautifully: Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It’s not just in some of us; it’s in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others. Ladies, we have to support each other. We

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have to encourage, empower, uplift, and celebrate each other. I really hope and pray that by me uploading a fabulous fun shot of myself where I felt beautiful (Yes! I’m actually saying “I felt beautiful”) that it will unconsciously give you permission to do the same. Now, let’s be clear: I’m not talking about taking a million sexy “selfies” and posting them all over the internet because we’re desperate for attention and approval. I’m asking you to not be afraid to be your best, happiest, most beautiful and empowered YOU. Shine bright, my friend. Shine bright! The world is counting on us!

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Crystal Andrus – A leader in the field of self-discovery and personal a

very

transformation. tough

From

beginning—one

that could easily have spun her into darkness—Crystal has risen to become an international coaching sensation, three-time, best-selling author, international speaker, TV personality, host of her own “CBS Crystal Andrus Radio Show”, founder of “The S.W.A.T. Institute (Simply Woman Accredited Trainer)”, founder of the new online magazine, www.simplywoman.com, spokesperson for the health & wellness line of products—“Xooma” (sounds like Zooma), as well as a world-renowned women’s advocate. Her latest book about “Woman Energy™” is in the works, and will prove to be her greatest accomplishment to date! (Stay tuned!!) www.crystalandrus.com

Real Secret

The

to the

EMPOWERED Life BY CATHLEEN O’CONNOR

any eons ago, in times now long forgotten, a much-revered Goddess sat and contemplated her world. Like you, she had fought many battles, won and lost a few wars, been stung by the disappointment and hurt of rejection and uplifted by love. Her heart had been broken open by loss more than once and thrilled more than once to regenerative feelings of new beginnings. She, like you, had become wise. From the peaks of the Himalayas to the bottom of Neptune’s kingdom she had traveled; each journey another opportunity to understand what really mattered; to find the truths wherever they were hidden, that would reveal the secret to the empowered life. Thirty years she traveled. Perhaps many of you have traveled as long. Thirty years of searching, questioning and experiencing all the universe had to offer.

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The wisdom she ultimately discovered could never be used by unscrupulous people to enslave others. It could not be misused to start a new system of beliefs that restricted anyone’s free expression of their own inner knowing. And most importantly this wisdom could not be used by those who sought to profit from it at another’s expense. No, this wisdom was available to everyone and always worked to empower the person who used it. This secret wisdom sets each person free to create the life of her own design. The Goddess had discovered that all she had to remember were four little words:

“Choose, and choose again.”

“Not choosing is choosing.” In fact it is one of the most powerful forms of choosing because the effects are immediate and often go unrecognized. Not choosing keeps you stuck where you are in life – imprisoned by your own acquiescence to the status quo. Every choice matters because every choice sets in motion a flow of energy that brings results. And there is no “perfect” choice in any one situation. Not choosing out of fear of making a “mistake” is one reason you might decide to postpone choices. Yet the postponement or procrastination is a choice – one that stops you from moving forward in your life. Even the smallest choices matter from how you choose to begin your day, to the food you eat, the company you keep, the words you speak and the actions you take. Every thought, emotion or action is another opportunity for conscious or unconscious choice-making. You may not be able to choose to give yourself a ten percent salary raise but you can choose how you approach your work. You can choose your attitude, your behavior and your communication. You can ask for what you need. You may not get it but the choice of asking is still important because it keeps you moving forward – choosing with conscious intent is always empowering. And the more you practice conscious choice the more empowered you become in every area of life.

“Choice moves you out of victimization and into self-actualization.” You do not choose to have hurtful things happen to you. They happen to everyone. It is in how you respond to events, whether injurious or beneficial, that exhibits your power of choice and the resiliency that choice provides. And that is the essence of the Goddess’ secret – that choice and exercising your power of choice in all its forms is about freedom – personal and societal. When we talk about the goddesses of old or the principles of the Divine Feminine, emphasis tends to be on the “acceptable” traits of beauty, compassion, justice and good will. Yet the archetypes of old embraced a much more complex view of feminine power. Along with the light came the darkness and each was valued equally. In order to be fully in your light, you have to have traveled the path of the alchemist – you have to have met your shadow, embraced your weaknesses and conquered your fears. And, you have to find a way to love and accept all that you are in order to be truly empowered to create the life you want.

“You have to choose . . . and choose again.” No matter what age, you grew up within a context of “rules for women.” These “rules” often reinforced in families, schools, churches and the media can disempower. As you identify some of the oft-hidden “rules” that have flowed underneath your life, you might also realize that those beliefs about who you are and how your life should

WISDOM & SELF-GROWTH

You may not realize it but you are constantly choosing the life you see around you. Whatever you don’t like remains not because you truly want it, but rather because you choose not to act to shift things in the direction you would prefer.

be have only as much power over you as you allow. Once you become aware of the rules you’ve lived by, you can assess their value in the present and make the changes you want. I’m asking you to write your own rules, ones that call forth the highest and best of who you truly are. Like most women, you rightfully want to have it all. And like most women, you may have mistaken that option to have it all with trying to do it all and do it all at the same time. The ability to have it all is an exercise of the fundamental core power of choice. The empowered woman uses that power of choice to align with what she wants most and lets the rest go. She knows that trying to do it all leads to a schedule overflowing with appointments and tasks that disconnect her from her true needs, values, desires and goals.

“So, on to a new model of the empowered life!” As you make conscious choices you will find that life shifts around you. Relationships especially will change. Every new choice you make will bring ripple effects throughout your world. Some will feel more like waves and not all will be easy, but even waves have ebb and flow and things have a way of coming back into balance.

Take some time and sit with a journal and see what you discover when you ask yourself: • What do I need and want in my work? • What do I need and want in my relationships? • How do I want to express my creativity? • What do I need and want for my health and well-being? • What do I need and want through my connection to spirit? Each of these areas – Work, Health, Relationships, Creativity and Spiritual Connection – is a high-value and necessary part of who you are and each needs expression in your life in order for you to feel whole and happy. Each feeds you – body, heart, mind and soul. The incredible power of choice lies within you, and it is choice that gives you the opportunity to create the empowered life, one that is a true reflection of the many aspects of who you are. Now that you’ve taken the time to discover what you truly need and want to create the rich and fulfilling life you deserve, there is only one thing left to do:

“Choose, and choose again.”

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Cathleen O’Connor, Ph. D. – Cathleen is a best-selling author, inspirational speaker and life/business mentor. Quoted as a dream expert in the Huffington Post and featured as an expert work-lifebalance source in various publications she is the author of the 2014 International Bestseller, High Heels on the Hamster Wheel. Find her at www.cathleenoconnor.com.

www.AspireMAG.net | April / May 2014

Soul Language BY JENNIFER UREZZIO

f you told me a dozen years ago that one day I would guide people to consciously connect to their Souls, I think I’d have laughed it off. Soul Language was divinely downloaded while seeking an answer to one big, multilayered question from the Universe : How can I receive more community interested in what I am interested in? And how can I connect deeply with myself and others? Thankfully, I received a response. Soul Language was born and has been helping people connect to their Souls and each other ever since. For centuries, people have been searching to find out who they really are, why they are here, and what it all means. Soul Language gives us the insight and the tools to answer these questions in an accessible, relatable way. By understanding our Soul Languages, we can listen more closely to our inner

wisdom, expand our awareness, and enjoy our lives. The process of learning your Soul Language can be combined with all sacred practices. It is a tool for knowing your life purpose and so much more. Your Soul Languages gives you the structure to gain clarity and know your truth, your message for yourself and others, and your path to divinely inspired action. My journey has been an interesting one. It all started by asking God how I could live and embody my life purpose. The answer is this body of work. I still remember the moment when I firmly accepted that, in sharing this work, I wasn’t insane—that it is a real tool that can support others. This knowing came while identifying a distant friend’s Language. She knew nothing about Soul Language or the Language definitions. After I identified her Language as a Partner (Axiom of Translation), she expressed this

WISDOM & SELF-GROWTH

What is Your

statement: “Before our session I asked myself what would I say if Jennifer asked me what my Soul Language was, and I wrote down the word Partner.” Her response was met with tears and many thanks for validating that I’m not crazy! I’m keenly aware of how I’ve created bumps in the road where it could have been easily paved. One of the biggest hurdles was letting go of individuals who were not ready to go deeper into their connection, even when I could see the possibilities for them. Another was using my courage and strength, not as a way to separate myself from others, but as a resource to build my life and surrender to the Divine. There are 3 categories of Soul Languages and they are all of equal importance. There is no hierarchy within your Soul or within the Soul Language community. It is a person’s specific combination of Languages that makes them unique. As an example, you may get excited when you meet someone who has the same birthday. Soul Language shows us we are even more unique than a shared birthday. With 19 Axioms of Quest, 33 Axioms of Translation, and 55 Tones, there is a 1 in 34,485 chance that the next person you meet will share all 3 Languages with you. You might go your whole life without ever meeting someone who shares all 3 Languages. Let’s discuss the 3 categories of Soul Language.

Axiom of Quest Humans like to KNOW exactly what they’re doing, what the strategy is and what their game-plan looks like. From literature and philosophy to hobbies and careers, we’re always trying to figure out WHY we are HERE.

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The Axiom of Quest is a person’s mission during their lifetime. It’s the “why” we are here, our purpose. This category is a driving force behind an individual’s Soul in this lifetime, and people often feel as if they need to complete this mission. Your mission is innately part of your physical, mental, emotional and spiritual makeup. You have been doing your mission without even knowing it since you decided to enter this world. This is the Soul Language that most people feel unaware of. Once they hear what it is, there is always a kind of “Aha!” moment of recognition. Having a conscious definition of your mission allows you to actively co-create with your Soul to conduct this mission with fewer struggles. What we mean by co-creating with the Soul is that you don’t try to control it. Your Soul

When you consciously understand what your mission is, it becomes your umbrella in any storm. Your mission can provide great comfort because it means you have a purpose. Purpose gives you the strength to weather many challenges. According to Soul Language, your mission will never be completed. The mission is more like a journey than a destination–it is the path. You have been on your mission since the moment you were conceived.

UNDERSTANDING AND BRINGING CONSCIOUSNESS TO THIS MISSION ALLOWS YOU TO:

• be more aligned with your mission • receive resources to make the journey without struggle • feel like you are fulfilling the mission • accept your power and talents • be more confident • recognize the next step more easily • avoid obstacles on the path

Axiom of Translation Just as we each have our own path in life, we also have our own way of being on that path. Even if two people have the same Axiom of Quest (the same mission), they may have different ways of approaching it. Your Axiom of Translation is how you approach your mission; it describes the tools and talents you bring to your life through your Soul. The Axiom of Translation also describes how you will be known here. Think of the words other people use to describe you; chances are, they are tapping into your Axiom of Translation without even knowing it. One example is the Weight Carrier. People with this Language are often described as reliable and strong. They use their strength to help others weather any storm as they move forward in their life purpose. As you understand your Axiom of Translation more fully, you receive more guidance for the individual steps or expression of your Soul agenda.

UNDERSTANDING AND BRINGING CONSCIOUSNESS TO THIS LANGUAGE ALLOWS YOU TO:

• be divinely guided in the “how” of things

WISDOM & SELF-GROWTH

has a master plan. I believe that before you entered this body, you had already decided certain Soul choices. These choices together form a master plan, your Soul’s agenda. But you can and do make choices for how each step of this plan gets fulfilled. Struggle comes from making free-will choices that are not in alignment with Soul choices. For example, we may know that the Soulful choice in a relationship is to create a boundary, but then we might ignore that boundary out of fear.

• let go of limiting beliefs that are preventing you from experiencing life without struggle • understand and accept your talents in a deeper way • receive more guidance about the next steps on your journey

Tone Your Tone is your Soul’s personality in the consciousness of love and without judgment. The way I heard this from the Divine is “It’s called the Tone because it is the way your Soul sings. It’s the voice of your Soul.” Understanding the Tone can provide you with information about your Soul’s preferences. Imagine expressing your likes, dislikes, wants, and desires without fear, doubt, or confusion. Some of us favor combining both the mind and the heart (Intellect) while others choose to be at the center of the action (Ringmaster). The Tone is the most likely Soul Language through which ego will be expressed. Understanding and bringing consciousness to this Language allows you to take things a lot less personally, and allows you to be more compassionate to yourself and others, while living more courageously.

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By understanding your Soul’s mission and how you relate to the world around you, you will be able to increase your effectiveness in your business and in your personal life. By tapping into your true self, you’ll gain a sense of clarity and alignment. You’ll become a more effective leader, and you’ll foster more profound relationships, which will help you feel more supported and connected. By understanding your Soul Languages, you will be able to listen more closely to your inner wisdom, expand your Read Online! awareness, and enjoy your life.

Jennifer Urezzio - Jennifer specializes in helping people connect – to themselves, to each other, and to the Divine. She founded a new paradigm, Soul Language, which provides guidance for understanding our true nature and tools for accessing deeper levels of awareness. This new insight into how the Soul expresses itself is being embraced by top healers, lifestyle coaches, and CEOs all over the world as a method for helping people recognize their purpose and live from a place of power and truth. To learn more visit: www.SoulLanguage.us and check out her book Soul Language: Consciously Connecting with Your Soul for Success.

“Healing is achieved th turning on rough the light of your so & allowing it to shine.” ul Janet N estor

HEALTH & WELLNESS Meditation &

“The gift of learning to meditate is the greatest gift you can give yourself in this lifetime.”

Sogyal Rinpoche Read Online!

Prayer BY ERIN COX

Meditation and prayer are two of the most powerful ways to create a calm center in your life. Meditation is essentially any practice that calms the mind by engaging in breathing and sitting peacefully in reflection. Some practices include trying to empty the mind of any thoughts, while others include thought observation and a focus on breath. There is even meditation that can be done while walking!

Three common types of meditation are:

ulness Mindf tion a Medit

Brea t Med hing itatio n

Read the full article online.

l Live & Virtua

UPCOMING EVENTS

Mind y t p m E ation Medit

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AspireMag.net

LIVING the

Goddess Lifestyle

The Modern Day Goddess’ Guide to

A Magical Springtime BY LISA MARIE ROSATI

y core belief is:

life is magic.

What I know for sure is that if you choose to look at life through a magical lens… life becomes a joyful, interesting and pleasurefilled adventure of EPIC proportions. How do I know this? Because, I live it… each and everyday of my life and have for a very, very long time. There are quite a few ways to connect with the magic of life and my intention for this article is to highlight for you what is in my opinion the easiest way to get connected – aligning with the flow of nature. NOTHING improves your life experience more than living in the flow of Mother Earth’s natural rhythm. Each month of the year has it’s own magical correspondences - “things and themes” that directly relate or correspond to that month. Correspondences are fundamental in how I view the world… I simply cannot stop looking at my life and the world symbolically! There are connections everywhere; nothing exists in isolation and everything is intertwined in the magnificent web of life. Integrating my spirituality with everyday life has been something I’ve been working towards for as long as I can remember… and as I age and evolve, I realize that the practice of living magically and intentionally is an essential ingredient to my overall happiness, wellbeing and life success. Using correspondences

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Being an expert at the art of manifestation, I know that in order to receive the yummy things that you desire, your “being” (the way you hold space) must be a vibrational match to that which you desire. So in a nutshell, if you want more love, prosperity and happiness you must live life, think thoughts and hold space at the same vibrational match. Love, prosperity and happiness are high vibrational in nature, this is quantum physics - proven science. If you’re feeling unlovable on any level, have a sense of lack and think the glass is half empty … the high vibrational “stuff” is not going to be able to find you… I see it happen all the time with women… their juicy, heartfelt desires are travelling on a parallel but higher energetic highway… leaving them feeling frustrated, overwhelmed and at times hopeless.

My soul work is to help women connect with Magic; The Sacred, Universal Laws, The Flow of Nature and her Personal Power. When a woman connects with her magic, miracles happen… she creates the life of her dreams and she lives her divinely contracted purpose. This is the juicy stuff that lights my soul on fire and makes my heart smile… So my lovely, getting back to correspondences… the simplest way to start

what’s blooming in the gardens, what old world holidays or celebrations are coming up, etc. This will give you a beginner’s glimpse into living in the magical flow. I’ve put together a summery of basic correspondences for April and May below. My hope is that you’ve become intrigued and begin to take notice of the magic that exists all around you in any given minute… that’s the first step. A few weeks ago on March 20th, we celebrated the Spring or Vernal Equinox and Ostara in the Northern Hemisphere which marks the official start of springtime. The magical theme for March is renewal,

When a woman connects with her magic, miracles happen… playing with magical correspondences is to take note at what’s happening around you that particular month in nature; what colors typically dominate the landscape, what animals are out and about frolicking, what smells are wafting through the air,

rebirth, breaking inertia, new beginnings, potential and possibility. The most important question for one to ponder in March is: What is possible for my life this year? Below are some basic correspondences and ways to bring the magic of springtime into your life…

HEALTH & WELLNESS

magnifies my magical life experience, helping me to stay at a high vibration and therefore attracting all of the good stuff. That sounds yummy doesn’t it? High vibrations - attracting the good stuff … yum, yum, yum!

With the turning of The Great Wheel of the Year comes longer hours of daylight and the growing season; literal, metaphorical and energetic. Let me take you on a magical journey into April… April winds are blowing gently through the trees, spreading the seeds of life all around us. The trees are budding… daffodils, tulips and other spring bulbs are emerging from the defrosting soil, the grass is greening up all over the place, small animals like bunnies, chipmunks and squirrels are scurrying about and the birds are chirping – life is stirring everywhere! April is a time of fertility and new growth. April is a the month to decorate eggs, work on creating balance, plant seedlings for your garden, collect moon water, make holy waters and floor washes, form friendships, take advantage of opportunities, commune with nature, look for rainbows and fourleaf clovers, and witness the trees begin to sprout their flowers and leaves… it’s a time to discover yourself again and do whatever it takes to rejuvenate your soul. It’s a great month to work on practical and intentional magic related to new beginnings, bringing new love into your life, or conceive a child. It’s time to stop planning and start doing - take all those ideas you’ve been brewing and bring them to fruition! Next… the month of May. The Month of May is our ascent into light; it’s bright, illuminating, celebratory and sexual (oooh la la – yup, we’re going there). Beltane falls on May 1st (which is also May Day), so this month’s magical theme swirls around fertility, frolicking, sensuality and human connection. Time to get outside and plant your seeds for the growing season… put your hands in the dirt. May is fiery and full of lust and passion; it’s the perfect month

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to reflect on sex and your sexuality. Some introspective questions to ask yourself and journal about during the month of May: What is my relationship with sex? Is it healthy or unhealthy? Do I overuse or suppress my sexuality? What are beliefs surrounding sexuality? Are they my own or are they downloaded beliefs from my childhood? May is the month to work with practical intentional magic related to careers and jobs. Have you been thinking about switching to a new position, or perhaps trying a new field altogether? Have you desired to take a class on something or work towards a degree? Take the thoughts, etc. you conceived in April, plant them now and allow them to thrive and grow! I hope this article tickled you hot pink and sparked some ideas and inspiration within you. Wishing you a spring blessed with infinite abundance and practical magic.

So it is.

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Passionista Lisa Marie Rosati – Passionista and Visionary Lisa Marie Rosati is a renowned Inner Goddess Catalyst for women, Creatrix of The Goddess Lifestyle Plan + Sugar Free Goddess, co-author of the international best selling book – “Embracing Your Authentic Self.” Lisa mentors women around the world on how to become a Modern Day Goddess by consciously designing how to get their health back, balance their feminine and masculine energies, ignite the fire within their souls and live a luscious goddess life filled with sacred practice, passion, radiant health, entrepreneurial success and prosperity.

The Path to Inner Freedom: HEALTH & WELLNESS

Learning to Work with the EBB AND FLOW of your

Menstrual Cycle BY MARY E. PRITCHARD, PH. D., HHC

e blame our bad moods and chocolate cravings on PMS. We gripe about our cramps and call our monthly ‘visitor’ “The Curse.” We tell people we’re on our period and they say, “I’m sorry. That sucks.” I’m as guilty of this as any woman. I used to believe that my “period” meant “a period of time when you’d better watch out and leave me alone!” It’s how I was raised. Until my periods stopped at age 25. After 5 surgeries for endometriosis, 3 rounds of drug-induced menopause that left me with osteopenia, and years of synthetic hormones to “treat” my abnormal menstrual cycle, my body’s reproductive system finally shut down. At first I was relieved. No more worrying about ruining my panties, ‘spotting’ unexpectedly. No more mood swings. No more cramps. But then I began to miss my cycle. Yes, you read that right. I missed having my period. I felt that something beautiful had been stolen from me. My right to birth a child, have healthy bones, have some semblance of a libido, and live a ‘normal’ life – all gone in the blink of an eye at the ripe old age of 25.

I grew resentful of my friends. I started telling them what a blessing their monthly cycles were. They thought I was crazy. But I knew – I knew what it was like to have the gift of womanhood taken away from you too soon. I felt robbed. I wanted my periods back. I got my wish. In Texas for the summer to help my mother care for my dying father, I started bleeding. I caught the first flight home, fearing something was wrong. I had been told – for 9 years – that I would never bleed again. “It’s a fluke,” the doctors said. “Let’s run some tests,” they advised. I stopped bleeding. I went back to Texas. 28 days later, I bled again. “That’s not possible. No one comes ‘out’ of menopause,” I was told. But I did. And it was a miracle. After receiving the gift of my menstrual cycles again, I vowed to honor them. To honor myself. To learn as much as I could about my monthly courses. About how our reproductive hormones ebb and flow throughout our monthly cycles. About how they affect our day-to-day lives. About how to maximize the gifts the Goddess had given me once again.

Days 1- 4 – Your period Sometime in my 20s I read a book called The Red Tent by Anita Diamant. That changed my view of my period forever. In Biblical times, the Red Tent was a place where women gathered during their menses. It was sacred and holy and housed all of the feminine mysteries and wonder – kind of like an ancient sorority whose initiation centered on menarche and whose rites

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...I knew what it was like to have the gift of womanhood taken away from you too soon. I felt robbed. I wanted my periods back. were based on menstruation. Unlike the Modern view that women are unclean during their periods, the Red Tent celebrated women’s ability to give the greatest gift of all: Life. It also emphasized the psychological and spiritual practice of sisterhood – women supporting women through this time, including the elder women teaching the younger women the mysteries of life. A modern Red Tent ceremony can be as simple as taking the first day of your menstrual cycle off from work to honor yourself and the Gift you hold, spend some time with your girlfriends, journal about how you feel, and enjoy the wisdom your body is providing you. This is the most important time of the month to Nourish yourself.

Days 5-11 Around day 4 or 5, you should start to notice a few changes: 1) your bleeding has slowed down or stopped completely, 2) the puffiness you may have experienced at the start of your cycle is gone, and 3) your mood is lifting. You have estrogen to thank for that. Between now and ovulation, your estrogen rises drastically. You feel incredible: sexy, flirtatious, and fun. Your energy is at its highest, as is your pain tolerance. Have a project that needs completed? Now’s the time. Been meaning to learn to tango? Go for it! Just don’t go on a shopping spree as we tend to be a little more impulsive when estrogen is on the rise.

Days 12-16

Days 16-22 Two days following ovulation, your progesterone level will begin to rise. Progesterone is a mood-enhancer that mellows you out and stamps out any anxiety you may have been feeling earlier in your cycle. So while you may not feel like a social butterfly right now, you are perfectly happy staying at home and reading a good book or entertaining a few close girlfriends. Progesterone also makes the mothering instinct come out. You may find you’re more willing to help complete strangers than you were two weeks ago. You may also feel like sprucing up the house or baking cookies. All of these are nurturing, home-body kinds of activities that your hormones are craving right now. You’ll also notice a creative peak in the week following ovulation. Always wanted to write a novel or take up painting? Now’s the time. You’ll find you’re more introspective and the words just flow right off the pen and onto your paper.

Day 23-28 Aahhh… PMS (Please Make Snacks) - as progesterone and estrogen begin to drop, your energy level and mood start plummet as well. Women often complain about being super crabby during their PMS and say

As a woman you have a power no man will ever possess: the power to give life. Each time you bleed, this is your body’s way of clearing out the old to prepare to bring life again. Even if you have no desire to have children, your cycle is still an incredible gift. Spend a day or two enjoying your next period using the tips above and you may find you actually look forward to your next menstrual cycle. I know I do.

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Mary E. Pritchard, Ph. D., HHC - Mary is a Professor of Psychology and Holistic Health Counselor. Mary’s extensive educational background combined with her personal passion and commitment to empowering women in healing their hormonal health naturally and reclaiming their Feminine Power empowers her client’s to experience profound shifts in their health. Claim Mary’s free eworkbook The 9 Signs Your Hormones are Out of Balance (and what to do about it) at www.EmbodyHeartandMind.com

HEALTH & WELLNESS

Most women ovulate between Day 12 and Day 16 of their menstrual cycle. You’ll likely notice a few physical changes occurring around this time: 1) your pain tolerance is through the roof, 2) your cervical mucus becomes thicker and more slippery, and 3) your skin is glowing and your smile is radiant. Oh – and your libido is soaring, making just about any man look like lunch!

things they wouldn’t otherwise say at any other time of the month. Pay attention. Without estrogen and progesterone to balance your moods, your true feelings emerge. This is not a bad thing. It serves to highlight areas of your life that need improvement. Now is the best time of the month for introspective work. Take your pen to paper, ladies. Journaling is a fabulous way to process emotions as they come up.

EMPATHIC ILLNESSES:

Do You

Absorb Other People’s Symptoms? BY JUDITH ORLOFF, M.D.

mpathic illnesses are those in which you manifest symptoms that are not your own. Many patients have come to me labeled “agoraphobic” with panic disorders, chronic depression, fatigue, pain, or mysterious ailments that respond only partially to medications or psychotherapy. Some were nearly housebound or ill for years. They’d all say, “I dread being in crowds. Other people’s anger, stress, and pain drain me, and I need a lot of alone time to refuel my energy.” When I took a close history of all these patients I found that they were what I call “physical empaths:” people whose bodies are so porous they absorb the symptoms of others. I relate because I am one. Physical empaths do not have the defenses that others have to screen things out. As a psychiatrist, knowing this significantly changed how I treated these patients. My job became teaching them to center and protect themselves, set healthy boundaries, and let go of energy they picked up from others.

www.AspireMAG.net | April / May 2014

TO DETERMINE IF YOU ARE A PHYSICAL EMPATH TAKE THE FOLLOWING QUIZ. Quiz: Am I a Physical Empath? Ask yourself: Have I been labeled as overly sensitive or a hypochondriac? ave I ever sat next to someone H who seemed nice but suddenly my eyelids got heavy and I felt like taking a nap? Do I feel uneasy, tired, or sick in crowds and avoid them? Do I feel someone else’s anxiety or physical pain in my body? o I feel exhausted by angry or D hostile people?

If you answered “yes” to 1-3 questions you are at least part empath. Responding yes to 4 to5 questions indicates you have moderate degree of physical empathy. 6 to 7 “yeses” indicate you have a high degree of empathy. Eight “yeses” indicate you are a full-blown empath. Discovering that you are a physical empath can be a revelation. Rest assured: You are not crazy. You are not a malingerer or hypochondriac. You are not imagining things, though your doctor might treat you like a nuisance. You are a sensitive person with a gift that you must develop and successfully manage.

Strategies to Surrender Toxic Energy Physical empathy doesn’t have to overwhelm you. Now that I can center myself and refrain from taking on other people’s pain, empathy has made my life more compassionate, insightful, and richer. Here are some secrets to thriving as a physical empath that I’ve learned so that it doesn’t take a toll on my health.

o I run from doctor to doctor for D medical tests, but I’m told “You’re fine?” m I chronically tired or have many A unexplained symptoms? o I frequently feel overwhelmed by D the world and want to stay home?

A Survival Guide for Empaths: 9 Strategies to Stop Absorbing Other People’s Illness and Pain

3. S urrender to your breath.

Evaluate. First, ask yourself: Is this symptom or emotion mine or someone else’s? It could be both. If the emotion such as fear or anger is yours, gently confront what’s causing it on your own or with professional help. If it’s not yours, try to pinpoint the obvious generator.

4. P ractice Guerilla Meditation.

1. Move away. When possible, distance

yourself by at least twenty feet from the suspected source. See if you feel relief. Don’t err on the side of not wanting to offend strangers. In a public place, don’t hesitate to change seats if you feel a sense of “dis-ease” imposing on you.

2. K now

your vulnerable points.

Each of us has a body part that is more vulnerable to absorbing others’ stress. Mine is my gut. Scan your body to determine yours. Is it you neck? Do you get sore throats? Headaches? Bladder infections? At the onset of symptoms in these areas, place your palm there and keep sending loving-kindness to that area to soothe discomfort. For longstanding depression or pain, use this method daily to strengthen yourself. It’s comforting and builds a sense of safety and optimism.

www.AspireMAG.net | April / May 2014

If you suspect you are picking up someone else’s symptoms, concentrate on your breath for a few minutes. This is centering and connects you to your power.

To counter emotional or physical distress, act fast and meditate for a few minutes. Do this at home, at work, at parties, or conferences. Or, take refuge in the bathroom. If it’s public, close the stall. Meditate there. Calm yourself. Focus on positivity and love.

6. S et healthy limits and boundaries.

Control how much time you spend listening to stressful people, and learn to say “no.” Remember, “no” is a complete sentence.

7. V isualize

protection around you.

Visualize an envelope of white light around your entire body. Or with extremely toxic people, visualize a fierce black jaguar patrolling and protecting your energy field against intruders.

8. D evelop X ray vision.

The spaces between the vertebrae in your lower back (lumbar spine) are conducive to eliminating pain from the

body. It’s helpful to learn to mindfully direct pain out of these spaces by visualizing it leaving your body. Say goodbye to pain as it blends with the giant energy matrix of life!

9. T ake a bath or shower.

A quick way to dissolve stress is to immerse yourself in water. My bath is my sanctuary after a busy day. It washes away everything from bus exhaust to long hours of air travel to pesky symptoms I have taken on from others. Soaking in natural mineral springs divinely purifies all that ails.

nasty symptom. It happens. With strategies I discuss in my book to surrender other people’s symptoms you can have quicker responses to stressful situations. This will make you feel safer, healthier, and your sensitivities can blossom. Adapted from The Ecstasy of Surrender: 12 Surprising Ways Letting Go Can Empower Your Life, Harmony Books, 2014 by Judith Orloff MD.

Keep practicing these strategies. By protecting yourself and your space, you can create a magical safe bubble around you that nurtures you, while simultaneously driving negative people away. Don’t panic if you occasionally pick up pain or some other

Read Online!

Judith Orloff, M.D. – Judith is a psychiatrist, intuitive healer, and NY Times bestselling author. Her latest book is The Ecstasy of Surrender: 12 Surprising Ways Letting Go Can Empower Your Life. Dr. Orloff’s other bestsellers are Emotional Freedom, Second Sight, Positive Energy, and Intuitive Healing. Dr. Orloff synthesizes the pearls of traditional medicine with cutting edge knowledge of intuition, energy, and spirituality. She passionately believes that the future of medicine involves integrating all this wisdom to achieve emotional freedom and total wellness. To learn more about the power of surrender visit www.drjudithorloff.com.

“Powerful women cra ve sa space for lu scious mom cred ents of self-care to balance all of the loving ener gy they gen erously give to oth ers.” Shann

Vander

Leek

THE

Wise Woman Way

Leading an

Authentic

Life

BY SUSUN WEED

ow do you know if you are leading an authentic life? What is an authentic life? Let’s work like a sculptor, taking away what isn’t part of what we wish to sculpt. We will get faster results by looking at the negative space – what we don’t want – than by trying to be positive. Instead of focusing on what we want – to be authentic – let’s look at what we don’t want: to be fake, contrived, unoriginal, unreal, a façade, a shell, a mask. And let us ask ourselves what motivates us to lie about who we really are and to hide our authentic self away. It is unlikely that anything that I desire or want is authentic. Even a desire for “peace on earth” is rarely a real expression of authentic desire. I have been manipulated to want these things. I have incorporated the messages that tell me what to want so deeply that I honestly believe they come from me.

www.AspireMAG.net | April / May 2014

We all know that an authentic life is not a life led in pursuit of getting things, even wonderful things like peace, or of getting money in order to get things. While it is true that a certain amount of money is required for adequate health and well-being, studies consistently find that more money does not bring more happiness. Money rarely creates a more authentic life either, though it may make living authentically easier, especially if your authentic self isn’t something you can make money from. One woman I know paints her authentic art for ten months of the year; and for two months out of the year she makes art for money. Her simple, fun, money-making art is wildly popular and it pleases her, though not as much as the sale of one of her complex, uneasy oil paintings. Desiring less is one way to be more authentic. Wanting to make money in order to purchase the object of our desire leads us immediately

Is it unlikely that anything that I think is authentic. I have been carefully taught. My teachers, my parents, my social milieu, and my culture have all had their way with me, have all lied to me about my authentic self. I see myself through a lens that has been distorted. I see myself, says one of my teachers, as all humans see themselves, through my mother’s eyes. Authenticity requires that I take off my cultural vision and look out of clear eyes. No expectations. No assumptions. No lies. This is the way to my authentic self. Authenticity demands that I stop kidding myself about myself, that I love and accept myself as I am right now, not as the perfect person I imagine I ought to be. One way to change my thinking is to change my story. I have never met a plant or an animal, no matter how small, how scrawny, how misshapen, how marginal it is, who believes that they are not good enough. Every plant and every animal that I know believes, without doubt, that they are the best!! One way to change my story is to give myself time alone, without responsibilities or demands. Even a half day vision quest can take us out of our ordinary thoughts and shake up our brains so authenticity can break through. It is unlikely that the way I present myself to others is authentic. Clothes, shoes, hairdos, makeup, scent, and such are signals that

are used to tell those around us how to relate to us. They indicate where we are on the social pecking order, how much we are worth, and how much respect we are due. This, more than modesty, is what lies behind our nervousness about being naked. Many pagan traditions insist on worshipping “skyclad,” that is, without clothes, for the purpose of erasing boundaries between those in the circle and creating an authentic and egalitarian experience. Authentic clothing is timeless, simple, and inexpensive. Authentic clothing is also usually wild and beautiful and made from natural fibers. Going without clothes, even for a short while, feeds the deepest authentic parts of ourselves. It is rare that all of what I say is authentic. I am known to be a person who “walks her talk,” and, for the most part, what I do and what I say match. Not so for a great many people I meet. For instance, at a conference, I was talking to someone about the raw food book she authored. I was surprised to hear that she eats cooked food; she wrote the book because her agent told her she could make lots of money that way. Every time we lie, in thought, word, or action, to ourselves or others, authenticity becomes harder to discern. Who we really are becomes more muddled and more difficult to manifest. Being authentic, we can see, is a tall order. We must actively uncover our unexamined beliefs and prejudices, taking off the clothing of our minds as well as that which clothes our bodies if we wish to look into the essence of ourselves as an authentic human being. The playful work of being authentic never ends. “The psyche is a million miles deep,” Jean Houston warns us. May you never get to the end of yourself!

HEALTH & WELLNESS

into behaviors that are less than authentic. “Dress for success.” “Play the game of office politics.” “Do what you must to get ahead in the rat race.” When we hear these messages in our minds, we know they are leading us away from authenticity. Finding a guide who supports our most authentic self is one way to bring more of our true self into view.

Shamanic Quest for My Authentic Self Sit in a quiet place, alone, no phone. Breathe slowly and fully. Imagine a large crystal, big enough to enter. Go in and go to the stairs. Put your hand on the handrail and your foot on the first step. Be slow and conscious as you tread on each of the thirteen steps. At the end is a path. Follow the path and it will take you to a beautiful garden. Sit quietly and listen for the sound of water. Follow that sound. Your guide to an authentic self is waiting for you. What is your guide called? What does your guide want from you? What will your guide give you? Tell your guide what you want. Ask for help. When you are ready to leave, walk back to the stairs and take the stairway back into the immense crystal. Step out of the crystal and stretch. Stretch. And breathe.

Read Online!

Susun Weed – An internationally renowned herbalist, author, and director of the Wise Woman Center in New York. She is a revered voice of the Wise Woman Tradition,

where

women’s bodies and women’s

emotions

are valued. Susun is a founding grandmother of the herbal renaissance and the originator of the concept of complementary medicine. www.SusunWeed.com

www.AspireMAG.net | April / May 2014

HEALTH & WELLNESS

STOP& Appreciate the Moment

BY DR. CYNTHIA THAIK

hether we know it or not, we’ve all suffered from ‘hectic-itis’ at some point in our lives. This common ailment happens when life gets so busy, fast-paced and hectic that it passes by in a blur often leaving us feeling exhausted, stressed out or even seriously ill. Although ‘hectic-itis’ may not be a scientifically defined ailment, the symptoms are all too real and can take a serious toll on your heart and your health. When you are constantly running around trying to do too many things at once, you don’t give your body or mind a chance to rest and regenerate. In response, your body rebels by shutting down, which makes it very difficult to fight off bacteria, viruses and disease. In addition, stress and fatigue put a huge strain on your heart, which could lead to cardiovascular problems. This is why I advise my clients who have fast-paced lives to make a conscious effort to slow down the pace before those negative effects side effects set in and cause serious and irreversible damage to the body.

The Benefits of Slowing Down the Pace When you step back and slow things down in your life, you are actually allowing your body to renew and regenerate itself. This allows your bodily systems to function better, aids in the elimination of harmful toxins, and conserves valuable energy that your body could be using to fight off internal and external pathogens. In addition, slowing things down creates a receptive environment where you can enjoy and appreciate life as it comes and regain your energy and balance.

How to Slow Things Down

CUT OUT THE UNNECESSARY Think about what is really important to you in life, set your priorities, focus on what really matters and let go of the rest. When you cut out the unnecessary distractions and stresses in your life, you will find that you can get much more done in a quicker and more efficient manner. Plus, you will free up space to do the things that make you truly happy.

FOCUS ON THE PRESENT

APPRECIATE WHAT YOUâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;VE GOT

Stop worrying about what happened yesterday or what you need to do tomorrow and concentrate on the now. Focus on one task at a time and donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t let the outside world or your own inner voices distract you from what you need to do at this very moment. Even if you are not doing anything in particular, be aware of what is happening around you and how you feel at this particular instance.

Studies show that people who express gratitude on a regular basis exercise more, report fewer physical ailments, make more progress towards their goals, sleep better, feel more connected to other people and feel better about life in general. Try to take time out every

www.AspireMAG.net | April / May 2014

STOP AND BREATHE When stress or anxiety sets in, stop what you are doing and take a moment to just breathe deeply. Concentrate on your breathing and heartbeat only, and ignore the negative thoughts pushing through. This does wonders for rebalancing your equilibrium and putting things in perspective. Meditation is a great way to practice this technique.

MAKE TIME FOR YOURSELF Many people spend the majority of their time fulfilling obligations to other people, yet very few people set aside time just for themselves. Although it may feel selfish to concentrate solely on yourself, finding ‘me’ time is crucial for finding balance and developing as an individual. Try to find a slot of time every day to be on your own and do something you love, even if it is simply reading a newspaper, listening to music or taking a short walk.

As a cardiologist I know how difficult it can be to step back and slow down the pace, especially when you have job commitments, a family to care for, bills to pay and social obligations. It may seem like you don’t have a moment to spare, but I can honestly tell you that by cutting out the unnecessary

and creating time for yourself to live in the moment, breathe and appreciate the good things in life, you will probably find that your energy levels will increase, you will get sick less often and you will feel a renewed sense of calm, focus and joy. Moreover, you will be doing an immense favor for your heart, body, mind and spirit. © 2014. Dr. Cynthia Thaik. An excerpt from Your Vibrant Heart: Restoring Health, Strength, and Spirit from the Body’s Core.

Read Online!

Dr. Cynthia Thaik – Dr. Cynthia Thaik is a board certified, Harvardtrained cardiologist and founder of Revitalize-U, a wellness center focused on health, nutrition, fitness and detoxification. Dr. Cynthia is the author of Your Vibrant Heart: Restoring Health, Strength & Spirit for the Body’s Core. Through her cardiology practice and wellness center, she has helped thousands of clients make transformational changes in their health, by changing the way they think, act, and feel. For more insights about how to nurture and care for your heart on both a physical and emotional level visit www.DrCynthia.com.

“Faith is be lieving tha t the outcome w ill be what it should be, no mat ter what it is.” Colette

Baron-

Reid

HEALTH & WELLNESS

day to write down three things you are happy for or appreciate in your life. You may just find that when you focus on the good, the small things become less important, less likely to distract you and less likely to eat up your time.

www.AspireMAG.net | April / May 2014

RELATIONSHIPS

“Don’t go through life, grow through life.” Eric Butterworth

ad Re ne! li On

Soul to Soul Parenting: eciation Gratitude and Appr BY ANNIE BURNSIDE Gratitude and Appreciation are cornerstones in an expanding family spirituality. It is extremely easy to teach this simple, yet profound spiritual theme. These two words will become the most-used in your family’s spiritual language. Speak of gratitude and appreciation on an hourly basis in your home. Their truth and power will infuse your family with a genuine sense of godliness, awe, and grace. The peace that gratitude and appreciation can provide in any situation is truly immeasurable. The Universe invites you to bask in the glory of All That Is in every single moment of every single day. Feeling appreciative and grateful simply says back to All That Is, “Yes. Thank you. I joyfully accept!” Deep gratitude and appreciation make you aware that as a spiritual being you sing in harmony and dance in rhythm with the fullness of Life. Read the article online.

CHECK OUT MORE ONLINE!

AspireMag.net

l Live & Virtua

UPCOMING EVENTS

Interview with LOVE AND PASSION COACH

Stacey Martino Aspire Magazine is honored to introduce you to Love and Passion Coach Stacey Martino, Aspire’s Expert Relationship Columnist. Stacey helps people who feel stuck, frustrated and helpless with the challenges of intimate relationship. Stacey firmly believes that it does NOT take two to tango, that one person can significantly shift the dynamics of the relationship. Trained and certified by Tony Robbins and Cloe Madanes, Stacey is a certified marriage educator and divorce preventionist.

ove and Passion Coach! I love the sound and energy of that! I believe every woman yearns for more of each in her relationship, Stacey. What was

the defining moment in your life that led you to the transformational work you do today with clients from around the world? Fourteen years ago my relationship with Paul was hanging by a thread. During a very

www.AspireMAG.net | April / May 2014

raw and painful summer night, he came to see me to find an elegant way of asking me if we could go back to being best friends, because our dating relationship was going so terribly. In a total breakdown (that surprised me as much as it surprised him), I sobbed uncontrollably. I describe my reaction as surprising because back then my nickname was “The Ice Princess” and it was a fitting

“THE GREATEST OPPORTUNITY WE HAVE IN INTIMATE RELATIONSHIPS IS THROUGH POLARITY – THE SPARK BETWEEN THE MASCULINE AND FEMININE ENERGIES.” title for me. That night, something inside of me snapped, and through the tears I had a deep knowing that all the “self-protecting” that I’d done, the walls I put up and the distance I kept, had FAILED. My fail-safes didn’t protect me from having my heart broken. In the same moment, I was also terrified that I would lose the man that I loved without the chance to be my true authentic self with him. Without any relationship skills (only my raw vulnerability), I poured my soul out to Paul and promised him I would figure out a way to be my real self. Instead of playing half-assed I’d show up playing “full-assed!” Whatever that meant... Luckily for me, Paul was deeply moved by my raw vulnerability, which he’d never experienced before. So I jumped in with both feet. I studied everything I could to transform myself. Some things were incredibly helpful, other things caused a lot of damage. Ultimately, I completely transformed myself, and my transformation shifted Paul. One day he came to me and asked me what I was doing to create such a huge shift for us.

Stacey, I can see that you received powerful gifts from your journey. What would you say is the greatest insight or gift you received from your relationship experience?

There are so many gifts. Life is always giving us experiences to grow into the best versions of ourselves. Some experiences are positive and some are less than positive, but they all serve us. That summer night with Paul was honestly the most painful and scariest night of my life. It’s hard to explain, but it was like in one night, I felt that everything I “thought I knew” was unraveling. Turns out it was the best thing that could have happened to me. With zero certainty (and unsure of everything I thought I knew); I got real, raw and vulnerable at a really deep level. When I uncovered and shared the authentic ME (the one I had been so afraid to show my whole life), Paul felt drawn to me. My transparency compelled him to give us another chance, even when he had no idea how things could be any different. While I didn’t fully learn this lesson during that one night. In time, the greatest lesson was, “if I am true to myself, people will love the truth in me.”

RELATIONSHIPS

TO CREATE THIS PASSION

From that day forward, we both dove in by investing 14 years and over six figures to transform our relationship into the magnificent love affair we enjoy today. Today it is our mission to help every person who wants to transform their relationship and create a magnificent love affair.

magnificent intimate relationships. When you implement those tools to show up differently in your relationship on a consistent basis, you can positively transform your relationship into the relationship you really want!

Stacey, I’ve heard you say “it does not take two to tango”, and you know that’s contrary to everything we are told. Can

one person really shift their intimate relationship without the other partner participating? And how can they do this? Yes, it’s absolutely true. One person is always shifting the dynamics of every relationship and you already know this because you’ve experienced it. I could be super nice and loving to you, and you are going to respond to me one way. Then I could be a total bitch to you and make you wish you never got into relationship with me and you are going to respond to me totally differently. If I stay a bitch consistently through time, ultimately YOU will shift the dynamics of our relationship by distancing yourself or leaving me. I changed, you did not. And yet, my change shifted our relationship significantly. This is how one person is ALWAYS shifting the dynamics of every relationship. And in intimate relationships, the changes happen much quicker than in any other relationship. The reason is that, in our intimate relationship, we all have a heightened awareness of how our partner is treating us because the stakes are so high. I empower you to utilize the tools and strategies that really work in creating

www.AspireMAG.net | April / May 2014

The truth is, it is VERY rare that both partners in an intimate relationship want to work on the relationship at the same time, with the same solution or methodology. I’ve found that too many people allow this to keep them stuck, figuring that if their partner doesn’t want to do this with them, then there is nothing they can do. I transformed my relationship with my husband Paul before he was inspired to join me. Our shared experience is why we strategically designed our Relationship Transformation System™ to empower one partner to transform the relationship without the other partner needing to participate for the process to work.

Stacey, I’ve heard you speak about the problems that come from trying to keep a balanced 50/50 relationship and how that’s one of the things keeping so many people stuck in their intimate relationship. I thought a 50/50 relationship is a good thing? Can you explain what you mean? I understand. I was raised to believe that a 50/50 relationship was a great thing, something to strive for! Here’s the truth, 50/50 relationships do not create magnificent love affairs. By definition, a 50/50 (even) relationship involves the process of “measuring” what you are getting back in exchange for what you are giving, unconsciously or consciously.

So, if you are always measuring to make sure that what you are getting back is “even” to what you are giving, the “what I’m getting back” part of that equation is always going to fall short. You will be unhappy, disappointed, resentful, angry, whatever it is for you. By definition, “measuring” is a relationship killer, and literally BLOCKS the process of relationship transformation that everyone wants to experience.

fundamental causes of this epidemic is the lack of POLARITY, the spark between masculine and feminine energy. Why is

this happening and what can we do about it? In intimate relationship, love comes from sameness. However, passion comes from differences. So unfortunately, in the natural progression of a long term relationship, as we have more in common and go deeper into love, we have fewer differences and the passion fades away. It doesn’t have to be this way though! You can create a height of passion that matches the depth of your love! The greatest opportunity we have in intimate relationships to create this passion is through Polarity – the SPARK between the masculine and feminine energies.

The only formula that “GIVE YOUR LOVE FREELY, BECAUSE YOU works is 100%/100%. Give your love freely, ARE MADE TO GIVE YOUR LOVE, WITHOUT because you are made to give your love, MEASURING WHAT YOU ARE GETTING without measuring IN RETURN!” what you are getting in return! It’s ironic, nearly everyone that doesn’t live this way is completely resistant Masculine energy or “presence” is that deep, to accepting this…and yet, answer this rooted, immovable, decisive, confident question for yourself “isn’t that what you want energy when a man knows who he is, knows from your lover right now?” Don’t you want what he wants and won’t let anything stop them to give you their love freely without him from achieving his outcome. This is measuring what they are getting back in the masculine presence that every woman return? You want to be loved unconditionally, craves. Unfortunately these days, men lack but perhaps you don’t LOVE unconditionally positive role models demonstrating a mature yet. masculine presence. In an effort to be less threatening and more accepted, many men Stacey in one of our recent chats are disconnected from their masculine you spoke about the “passion-less” presence and have stepped more into their relationship epidemic and that one of the feminine or gentler energy.

RELATIONSHIPS

It’s an “I’ll do this for you and you do that for me” approach. This is a recipe for disaster in an intimate relationship. Since you are in relationship with a human being who is not you, they will never be able to “give” to you exactly the way you would give something to yourself. They are never going to be able to “get it right” for you all the time…not even close.

Feminine radiance, on the other hand is an OPEN energy. A woman’s feminine radiance stays open, feels everything, gives compassion and it’s an energy that can change direction at any moment. Unfortunately today many women falsely associate femininity with weakness and submission and they have pushed down their feminine energy to step more into their masculine energy. When a woman puts on her masculine mask and picks up her masculine tools, she is greatly rewarded in the workplace, and she also feels safer being more closed and less vulnerable. I speak from experience; this is where I was stuck years ago. Without many role models of women who are both powerful and fully open in their feminine energy, it’s less than easy for women to embrace their feminine radiance. With men disconnected from their masculine presence and women suppressing their feminine radiance, the energies have flipflopped. As a result, the passion has dwindled or fizzled out. When men reconnect to their true masculine presence in a way that serves their woman; and when women fully open to their feminine radiance, the polarity is quickly reignited!! Not only will this put the zing back into your intimate relationship, but when you reconnect to your true core energy, the energy surge that you will feel will rejuvenate and energize your life!

Tell us more about your proven solution – the 8 step Relationship Transformation System™ and how everyone can begin transforming their relationship right now with your free gift. It’s our mission that everyone should walk through each day, completely loved as their most authentic self, invigorated and alive with passion in their intimate relationship. This is not the reality for most people. That is why we give our proven eight step Relationship Transformation System™ to everyone who wants to create unshakable love and unleashed passion for themselves! Do this for yourself! Read Online!

Discover the secrets to reignite the passion in your relationship, create an indivisible alignment and enjoy a ravishing intimacy with your partner, using proven love and passion strategies that honor who your most authentic self, empower you to transform your life on your own and that really work. Claim Stacey’s powerful free gift: How to Transform Your Relationship in Eight Steps audio program. See Stacey’s full page ad on the inside front cover.

www.AspireMAG.net | April / May 2014

TRANSFORMING

Relationship

Your

Love IS NOT

ALL THERE IS! BY STACEY MARTINO

“All You Need is Love.” – The Beatles

o one wishes this quote from the Beatles were true more than me! I LOVE love! My desire is for everyone to walk through their day completely and totally adored for their most authentic self, full and energized by the passion they have with their partner!

But that’s not the reality is it?

www.AspireMAG.net | April / May 2014

In intimate relationship, you cannot have a magnificent love affair without PASSION! Passion is the life-force of your relationship!

Unfortunately, most of us were raised to believe that a relationship either works out or it doesn’t. And when things cross a threshold in our relationships, we ask ourselves the hard question “Maybe this just wasn’t mean to be?” This is when people give up.

to be” then love is all you need. These false beliefs are one of the greatest tragedies facing relationships today. They are responsible for more broken hearts and homes than anything else!

I’m here to take a stand today…for your relationship. It’s time to put an end to these two false beliefs that destroy so many lives:

What is LOVE then? Tony Robbins says that “Love is the oxygen of the soul.”

The false belief that love is enough.

Love is the greatest opening of our spirit. It’s what connects us to other human beings. We all crave to be loved, treasured and cherished by an intimate partner who puts us before all else! “Passion is the life-force of your relationship!” Stacey Martino

The false belief that if it’s meant to be, it will just work out.

In intimate relationship, you cannot have a magnificent love affair without PASSION! Passion is the life-force of your relationship! It’s the energy within you. We all NEED passion or we feel numb inside! LOVE is incredibly powerful! But it is not enough to sustain a magnificent relationship that lasts a lifetime!

WHY NOT? Many people think that love should be enough and that if the relationship is “meant

WHY DO RELATIONSHIPS END? While there are thousands of different symptoms, it comes down to just one fundamental cause. People start to “question” the relationship when their needs are not being met by their partner. And they give up when their needs are not being met by their partner consistently and they give up the hope that things can be any different.

WHAT ARE THESE NEEDS? According to Human Needs Psychology, all people have the same fundamental human needs. The need for security,

RELATIONSHIPS

Why not? Because it takes more than falling in love or being in love to create long lasting love that grows stronger and more passionate with every day!

love, significance, variety, growth and contribution. However, “the masculine” and “the feminine” have extremely different requirements for having their needs met within intimate relationships. One of the key challenges people face today is that men and women lack an understanding and appreciation for the drastic differences between the masculine and the feminine. As a result, we GIVE what we want to GET, but that’s not what our partner NEEDS in order to have his needs met!

If we didn’t feel the pull of LOVE, we wouldn’t care enough to go deep and be vulnerable with our lover. Without the life-force of the passionate desire we feel inside for our partner, we would not have the energy to keep growing into the best version of ourselves, have heartfelt understanding for our partner and create the love and life we want!

WHAT DOES OUR PARTNER NEED AND HOW CAN WE PROVIDE IT?

As women, we interpret masculine actions, feelings and thoughts through our “feminine” filter and often react to our men as if they were “misbehaving” women who should know better and are having “bad behavior.” While we’re attracted to their masculine “differences” (at times), this also frustrates the heck out of us.

There are hundreds of strategies I could share with you to help you meet your partner’s needs and take your relationship to the next level. Today I’ll share one fundamental strategy for the masculine and one for the feminine that will make the biggest impact in creating your magnificent love affair!

By the same token, men are interpreting our actions, feelings and thoughts through their “masculine” filter and get completely confused because nothing in their masculine world can explain the feminine. While every masculine man is attracted to the feminine, it also makes them crazy because they can’t understand it in their world.

The feminine has a deep fundamental need to be provided for and not abandoned. It’s not a WANT, it’s a NEED. And in today’s society…it’s getting unnecessarily complicated and ignored. Regardless of how “unpopular” this is, it’s the truth and it’s time we come back to honor this truth.

It’s a miracle we ever get together at all, isn’t it?

Can a feminine woman provide for herself, her family and her partner? Of course! This isn’t about what we CAN do. We can do anything a man (masculine) can do. However, there is a huge difference between how the feminine experiences providing and how the masculine experiences it.

Just what is the miracle that draws us together and keeps us together? The miracle is LOVE and PASSION! It’s the LOVE and the PASSION that gives us the strength of spirit and the energy we require to even get in there and give our relationships a go!

www.AspireMAG.net | April / May 2014

The masculine is wired to provide and his worthiness is tied to his ability to provide.

Which brings us to one of the most fundamental needs that a masculine man has. This need is so completely off most women’s radars that you may not even believe me when you read this! A (masculine) man needs to make a (feminine) woman HAPPY.

It’s what he’s made to do and when he’s not doing it, he can feel completely worthless, the ramifications can be catastrophic.

He must be able to make her happy to have a thriving intimate relationship with her. A man will give up on an intimate relationship if he feels that he can’t make his woman happy. He will END that relationship when he gives up the hope that he can ever make her happy.

A woman in her feminine does NOT have this same experience with providing. We CAN provide, but we don’t NEED to provide in order to feel worthy of living. A woman in her feminine will provide when she needs to, but eventually she will feel depleted and resentful that she is not being provided for. Or she will flip into her masculine energy and stay there so she can keep providing and feeling worthy and significant from her abilty to provide.

This is terribly unfortunate, because so many women today struggle with allowing themselves to be happy! Don’t get me wrong, I know that women WANT to be happy. But the truth is, we have so many rules about how things have to be in order to BE happy. We often make it SO hard to win and really easy to fail. We make it very difficult for our men to experience the success of making us happy, especially if that man has disappointed us many times in the past!

A man who is in his masculine would NEVER imagine a woman has a fundamental need to be provided for. In fact, if you ask them, many men will respond to this with the shocked and confused response of “then why doesn’t she LET me do stuff for her!?”

As women, we also have a pattern of withholding our love as a means to correct “bad” behavior. So even when our partner does something good, we don’t “reward” it because the voice in our heads says something like “what do you want, a medal?”

RELATIONSHIPS

It’s an ironic energetic snag for us ladies. We WANT to be provided for, but the energetic SNAG happens when we feel the truth that allowing ourselves to be provided for by another human being (who can’t do everything exactly the way we do it), takes a level of vulnerability that we feel resistant to.

or “please, the score is like a million to one mister, try and catch up!” This unconscious pattern is killing our relationships and pushing our men away because we are blocking them from meeting one of their fundamental needs. The need to make us happy. What’s the solution? Be a woman who can be made happy! Find your joy! Allow yourself to be delighted! Even if he brings you a salad with everything you would NEVER eat…delight over the salad he brought you! Instead of berating him for all the mistakes he made, LOVE him up and adore him for his effort! Find something to be grateful for, even if it’s just that he’s still attempting to connect with you and serve you! You know what? It feels AWESOME!!! Being HAPPY is such a wonderful feeling! So BE happy! When you allow him to “make you happy” consistently you will experience a significant transformation in your relationship! While LOVE alone is not enough to sustain a magnificent love affair that lasts a lifetime, I’m going to take a stand for you and put

“Being dee ply loved b y so gives you s trength, wh meone ile loving someone d eeply gives you courage.” Lao Zu

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an end to the false belief that it should be! Don’t give up on the magnificent love affair of your dreams my darling! Not on my watch! Magnificent love affairs are not found, they are created. So stop searching and start building, it’s so worth it!

Read Online!

Stacey Martino - Stacey Martino helps people who feel stuck, frustrated and helpless with the challenges of intimate relationship. Through strategic private coaching, programs and events for her Relationship Transformation System™, individuals learn to use her proven strategies and tools to create an unshakable love and unleashed passion that lasts a lifetime. Stacey firmly believes that it does NOT take two to tango, that one person can significantly shift the dynamics of the relationship. Trained and certified by Tony Robbins and Cloe Madanes, Stacey is a certified marriage educator and divorce preventionist. Stacey is a sought-after relationship expert appearing on numerous media outlets and telesummits. Stacey will be sharing her passion-filled message and relationship tips on the Playful Passionate You Summit and invites you to join her. Download our free audio program “How to Transform Your Relationship in Eight Steps” and begin creating your magnificent relationship today!

Choreograph Your

Sacred LIFE BY SHANN VANDER LEEK

“Let yourself be drawn by the stronger pull of that which you truly love.” —Rumi

love the practice of choreographing my life in a beautiful way. Exploring how I want my sacred life to look and feel has been top of my mind since leaving my corporate job a little over 7 years ago. So much has changed since breaking free of my golden handcuffs. Over this signifiant transformational process I’ve learned to shed my masks, face my shadow and reclaim my feminine sovereignty. I’ve totally transformed my precious life by design. I’m grateful to have evolved from a stressed out TV advertising sales director to the Soulful Transformation Goddess I am today. Here’s what I’ve uncovered so far. I walk in beauty and define my sacred life when: • I show loving kindness and compassionate self-care to myself and others • I allow for lots and lots of creative expression • I honor and connect with my spirituality • I contribute, collaborate and connect in community • I consciously choose to explore and experience infinite gratitude

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Here’s what I’ve learned... My heart’s purpose is to witness, listen and engage with women who want to walk in beauty, with full awareness of their power, divinity, and joyful essence. I revel in my true calling because I’m clear about how I wish to show up on the world. I hope this offering will spark you to compare, contrast and explore how you wish to design the rest of your days.

LOVING KINDNESS & COMPASSIONATE SELF-CARE “When we give cheerfully and accept gratefully, everyone is blessed.” —Maya Angelou I practice loving kindness every day with my family, friends and community. My practice includes nonviolent communication, generosity, mindfulness and staying in the present moment. I’m not a very patient woman, so learning to be gentle with myself and others is a big part of my practice. I tend to want what I want, and want it now! Thankfully, I’ve learned to laugh at this part of my personality. If you want to experience loving kindness and compassionate self-care, pace yourself and breathe deeply. Learn to recognize old patterns and quiet your shaming inner critics. Move through your life with the intention of leaving every person feeling loved and energized after sharing time with

you. Compassionate self-care is generous and loving way to honor your mind, body and soul.

CREATIVE EXPRESSION “Serious art is born from serious play.” —Julia Cameron I love landscape photography, music, writing, painting, cooking, and making my personal space inviting and beautiful. My environment, personal style and creative endeavors contribute to living sacred life. I find so much joy and peace living in a small village surrounded by water, woods and wild life. You can infuse your life with more creativity by exploring what you want to create and how you wish to express yourself. Discover what brings you the most joy. Learn to flaunt the sweet spots of your creativity. Make your home or apartment an oasis of your creative expression.

SPIRITUALITY “My religion is very simple. My religion is kindness.” —Dalai Lama My spiritual practice is a work in process. I begin and end each day giving thanks. I often light a candle and pray for the world, our country, my community, family and friends. I commune with nature often and make time for conversations with my angels and guides through prayer and journaling. I love lighting a candle, setting an intention and asking questions of my higher knowing. It’s amazing what messages flow on to the pages of my journal when I set a sacred container and listen.

RELATIONSHIPS

Once you uncover how you want to show up in the world, the next step is to gain clarity about what each of these areas represent to you. You have the choice to define your role and engage in activities that will support you to flourish.

Do you have a spiritual practice? You can invite more tranquility in your life by exploring which practices bring you comfort. You may wish to begin your spiritual practice by giving thanks, journaling or reading inspirational books.

GRATITUDE “Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life. It turns what we have into enough, and more. It turns denial into acceptance, chaos to order, confusion to clarity. It can turn a meal into a feast, a house into a home, a stranger into a friend. Gratitude makes sense of our past, brings peace for today and creates a vision for tomorrow.” —Melody Beattie The more thankful I am about my present reality, the more prosperity and abundance flow into my life. When I’m needy, constricted or feeling depleted, it seems as if everything comes to a halt. On the days you experience self-doubt, fear and uncertainty, you can still give thanks. Choose to be grateful for your health, that you have clean water to drink and a warm bed to sleep in at night. Learn to give thanks for your current situation, just as it is.

CONNECTION & FRIENDSHIP “Friendship is born at that moment when one person says to another: ‘What! You too? I thought I was the only one.” —C.S. Lewis Saying yes to participating in my wise women’s circle over the past 2 years provided me with the gift of connection. For most of my life I chose to go it alone. I

www.AspireMAG.net | April / May 2014

was the strong one and rarely ever asked for help from my friends. In the last two years I’ve softened and allowed myself to be witnessed when I’m sad, angry or feeling small. If you can relate to going it alone, do yourself a favor and set aside the illusion of your separateness. Learn to receive. Nurture your friendships. Be generous. Allow for more heart-centered openness, vulnerability and transparency. We are all in this together. Now that I’ve shared how I am defining my sacred life, I invite you to explore what makes you feel vivacious, joyful and divinely present.

SACRED QUESTIONS: What is your heart’s purpose? How do you wish to choreograph your sacred life? What can you do right now to be more mindful and present? Read Online!

Shann Vander Leek - Transformation Goddess, Shann Vander Leek is a delightfully curious force of nature. She is the founder of True Balance International and cofounder of Anxiety Slayer. She blogs at Transformation Goddess and mentors women experiencing lifealtering transition with her signature coaching system, podcasts, books and digital programs. Shann teaches compassionate self-care and sacred ritual to women who want to reclaim their divine feminine sovereignty. Claim access to Shann’s Transformation Goddess audio series to awaken the goddess within at www.transformationgoddess.com.

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“When you live your life with an

appreciation of coincidences an d their meanings, you connect wi th the underlying field of infinite possibilities.”

Deepak Chopra

Stop Trying to Make

ad Re ne! li On

Business Decisions in the Dark

BY MONICA SHAH

How quickly do you make decisions in your business? Think carefully about that answer because the quicker you make decisions, the more successful you will be in your business. Why? Because for every moment you are contemplating, you aren’t connecting and communicating with potential or current clients. And connecting with people is the main source of revenue in your business. In fact, many business owners use “deciding” as a crutch to keep them from having to face the sales or follow-up process. When was the last time you said, “Ok, when I decide what to do with my website, then I’ll go out and get more clients?” It’s an excuse I hear all the time. Read article online to discover three powerful tips to help you move forward. AspireMag.net

CHECK OUT MORE ONLINE!

l Live & Virtua

UPCOMING EVENTS

DOING

BUSINESS LIKE A

Goddess

SETTING Goals and BOUNDARIES that

Your

Honor

Feminine BY ELIZABETH PURVIS

Greetings, Goddess! Welcome back to Doing Business Like A Goddess, where I share key concepts that every feminine

conscious entrepreneur must know in order to succeed in today’s new business landscape, plus how to create extraordinary income and impact while honoring that you are exactly who the world’s been waiting for.

In the last five issues, I shared the first five key concepts for doing business like a Goddess…

1. GIVING YOURSELF PERMISSION 2. SUCCESS LEADS TO MORE SUCCESS 3. YOU MUST LET GO TO GROW reYaodu can these here. 4. GRATITUDE FIRST 5. MANIFESTING AND RECEIVING WITH GRACE

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The 6th and final key concept for doing business like a Goddess is:

As any expert in the personal development industry will tell us, setting goals is the first step to making your dreams a reality. But are setting goals and boundaries something you secretly resist? If so, you’re not alone. All too often, spiritual women resist setting goals because it feels heavy and masculine and that to set a goal means you must drive, strive and push against the divine flow – so “old paradigm!” they will say. After coaching hundreds of women over the years, what I’ve found is that underneath the many and varied reasons for not setting goals, what exists is either a fear that you won’t meet the goal OR if you really go deep, the fear that you WILL meet the goal. And the flip side is that when a goal is set, and not met – this perceived “failure” sets the wheels in motion of beating oneself up, feeling wrong, unworthy and questioning everything it is that you do and are capable of. Of course it’s only natural to want to “protect” yourself from this vicious cycle. The problem with all of this is you cannot manifest what you want unless you have a clear picture of what it is you want.

So how do you embrace goal setting that is empowered, supportive and free from the cycles of judgment, blame and shame? And how do you hold firm boundaries to support you in achieving your goals once they are set?

Here are 5 power tips to set empowered, soulsupportive goals that pull you forward…

S ET YOUR GOALS, NOT SOMEONE ELSE’S. One place where women get tripped up is when goals are set from a place of comparison. Just because someone else landed 5 clients at $5,000 each doesn’t mean this needs to be your goal too. Instead of looking outside for what your goals “should” be, look inside and answer the following questions: What

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SETTING GOALS AND BOUNDARIES THAT HONOR YOUR FEMININE.

The other problem is that not setting goals lets you “off the hook” from claiming and creating exactly what you want. It’s far easier to stay in a state of neutral limbo, right? But as we know, NOT moving is a stagnant, unnatural and unsupported energetic way of being in this world. Eventually if you’re not moving forward, you’re moving backwards. Another reason many women fail to meet their goals is that they have not held clear boundaries… overwork for too little money, giving oodles of time away for free, saying “yes” at the drop of a hat and putting everyone else’s needs before their own.

is my true Desire? What would be exciting and fun? What is my greatest desire right now? What is my Creative Spirit guiding me to do?

3. G ET FULLY ON BOARD

WITH GRACEFULLY SETTING BOUNDARIES.

One reason why women give away so much and fall short of their goals is because they truly don’t understand how much it costs them to do so. They get pulled into the old patterns of “I should do XYZ” because everyone else is doing it, “it’s the spiritual thing to do,” or whatever. The problem it’s simply that most of us were never taught to do the ONE thing that will empower us to take back our time and our energy, more than any other: set clear boundaries without

feeling guilty.

2. C HOOSE GOALS THAT ARE

REALISTIC, AND A STRETCH. Many women set themselves up for “failure” because they are choosing goals that are out of alignment for where they are now. As much as goals need to be tangible, they also need to be believable by you. They need to excite you and you need to be able to envision it coming true – for you. One of the secrets of manifestation is to start where you are – no further ahead or behind. Don’t let yourself off the hook. Is a goal of getting just one new client truly going to stretch you or keep you safe? (And sometimes, when our humanness wants to be really sneaky – a low set goal will not get met in order to reinforce non-supportive beliefs even more.) Remember, the whole point of a goal is to pull you

forward.

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It’s time to get REALLY clear, here: the shadow belief lurking behind boundaries violations is this: “The

other person getting what THEY want is more important than I am.”

The key to gracefully setting boundaries without guilt is to adopt this new breakthrough belief: What serves

me, serves others.

From this new belief, you can ask yourself what you need to say “yes” to and what you need to say “no” to in order to reach your goal. Then when then time comes to say “no”, the less said the better. When women say no, we instinctively want to jump in, justify, and explain. The urge to make everyone feel better is simply conditioning. It’s a pattern. You can make a new choice at any time by simply saying, “I’m sorry, I’m unable to do that.” And leaving it at that.

4. A SK, “WHAT’S THE LEARNING?”

There are reasons you might not reach your goals each and every time and these reasons are lush with valuable clues for you. Did you not attract the clients because your niche is not yet where it needs to be? Did you say yes to something that should have been a no? Or maybe you did not attract the partners you intended because something inside you needs to be cleaned up first….

And as you take aligned action (instead of frazzled action) and hold your boundaries, your goals will manifest with ease. This is magic in action – enjoy it!

Love and magic,

Elizabeth Read Online!

TRY THIS:

Next time you don’t meet a goal, rewrite your story. Replace the antagonist with the heroine (you) and dig deep for the incredible learning that is waiting for you – then, choose to see what new opportunity is now possible.

Elizabeth Purvis - Elizabeth is the creator of Goddess Business School®, and she shows spirit-led, mission-driven women how to price, package and market their services so they create extraordinary income

5. ASK FOR SUPPORT. Are you soooo good at giving support but when it’s time to ask for help, you shrink back and try to go at it alone? Stop being the lone wolf and build a support team of colleagues, mentors, learning resources and community. With this priceless resource in place – you’ll move through your wins AND your losses with ease, elegance and power.

and impact. Known for blending heartcentered sales, Internet marketing, spiritual principles and Universal Law, Elizabeth delivers simple ways for coaches, consultants, practitioners and healers to double or triple their revenues by creating multiple streams of income and enrolling ideal clients at higher fees. www.MarketingGoddess.com

CAREER/BUSINESS

In every success and perceived failure, there is learning to be had. When something goes astray, instead of going to the place of judgment, instead ask what you learned.

Remember, goals and boundaries are really just an extension of the expression of your Creative Spirit – the part of you that truly is longing to express, expand and act on its mission.

MINDSET:

The Inner PROFIT GAME for

BUSINESS Success BY JEANNA GABELLINI

hen it comes to profits, mindset always trumps strategy. When you practice cultivating an abundant mindset your profits will grow while your heart glows from the connection you feel to your team, clients and tribe. Abundance must be your internal vibration in order to produce it in your outer world. Do you tend to focus on your weaknesses in business? And rather than try to improve those areas do you just wish that you had more knowledge, more money, more marketing savvy, more resources, more people on your mailing list, and more promotional partners? Lack, lack, lack. You have to make that clear-cut decision to create more. Draw that line in the sand. Start creating abundance from where you are right now.

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Amplify the abundance you already have in your business. Begin to look for evidence that has already revealed itself in ways you may have overlooked.

now?

• What about your ideas? ow many people do you know would • Hsupport your business to grow if you asked?

NOW SHIFT UP YOUR INNER PROFIT GAME. Make a list of inspired actions that you could easily take to manifest your revenue goals in the next two weeks. practices are you willing to let go • Wof hat that are driven by scarcity? • What do you cling to out of habit? do you own that is breaking down • Wor hat worn out? do you keep your money? In a • Hnice ow wallet or one that is worn out? your bank accounts? • WDohatyouabout have a business account? Business savings?

re you willing to build your business • Asavings by adding at least $20 (or $200) each month?

For the next thirty days, commit to writing down at least five pieces of evidence that indicate that you’re going to increase your income.

HERE’S AN EXAMPLE: 1. Three new people liked my Facebook page 2. One new optin for my free gift 3. Someone asked about my services today 4. I sold a CD today 5. I spent an hour writing my book Notice that no huge sales were made in the example above but it directs your focus back to the progress you’re making rather sulking about not enough money. Your focus is to amplify the abundance you already have in your business. And trust that more is coming.

NOW IT’S TIME TO INCREASE YOUR SET-POINT AROUND ABUNDANCE. This is no tame game. You’ll have to release your fear around poverty, nobody buying your stuff, not having enough, being fearful about hiring people, fear about charging what you want, and you’ll have to stop giving away things from a place of lack.

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• What are your strengths? • Where have you already had success? can you see around you in your • Wwork hatplace that speaks of abundance? have one client or ten? Can • Dyouo you see the abundance of what is here

It’s one thing to talk about wanting to make more money but are you willing to change your game and devote time daily to fully align with your profit goal? Would you be willing to give it ten minutes a day if you could double (or even triple) your revenue?

Abundance is the absence of fear and resistance. It’s pure love and trust. Maybe you give away lots of time because you feel that’s the only way to convince people to say yes to buying from you. Maybe you cut your prices because that’s the only way you think people will buy. I’m not saying it’s bad to give away your time, energy, gifts, bonuses, etc. and I’m not saying that it’s bad to give discounts and make your prices affordable. It’s the mindset behind those actions that is important. And until you are making enough money to feel at ease, be mindful about making sure you are being abundant by being selffull. Put an emphasis on self-care on your business from a place of abundance, not resistance. I have priced my services based on fear and from abundance. It feels totally different when you are pricing strategically than from emotion. I’ve also not given price breaks from both lack and abundance. I was snotty about it when I came from lack … there was no way I was giving away anything. I wanted people to pay for my time. “ I deserve to be paid!” said like a brat. I was protecting my worth … rather than feeling at ease with my worth. Abundance is the absence of fear and resistance. It’s pure love and trust. You feel at ease in the world, in your business. You know you’re needs will be met and exceeded.

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You feel trust about money and customers flowing in. You trust that the people you hire will serve you well. It doesn’t matter if you’ve been burned before. I’ve had many people be very honest about their fear about joining one of my programs because they’d joined programs with other coaches and got no results. So whose fault is that?! Not the person they hired. You get what you focus on. And if you focus on the expertise or program not being enough, you’ll only get more of that. My bestie, Eva Gregory, likes to tell people that there is an ocean of abundance of all that we desire and we are walking down to the shore with a thimble in our hands thinking that is all we can take. There is an ocean of abundance for you. It will never run out.

• AA skllowforformore more • R eceive more •

Rather than try to tap into the vein of abundance in every area of your business all at once, I suggest you take one area of your business that you’d like to increase your profit setpoint. Your setpoint is like a thermostat setting. Once it’s at a certain number it stays there. For several years I’ve focused on created abundance by intentionally giving away information, bonuses, and always over-

delivering. And I reaped the rewards because it felt joyful to do it. It felt right. And I have a plan behind it.

I began putting $500 in it here and there. It felt awesome to see that grow. It felt abundant. Until a year ago I’d never had more than a few thousand dollars in it. Finally I decided to build it to $50,000. I thought it’d take me a few years. It took less than six months! The more I felt abundance the more abundant I was. I have my ongoing list for things that I want to buy for my business. Things that will make me feel happy and will feel abundant. Things like new headshots, new branding. I begun going after those, one thing at a time. The more I invested in my business the more it felt the Universe had my back. The more I trusted that I would manifest more

If you feel like you’re scrimping with time, energy and money it will make your business feel heavy. There is always a way to get what you want for your business. But until you say yes to investing in your business, it will feel like the things you really want are not accessible. The resources you need to significantly increase your profits are there. Once you make a concrete decision to have what you want, you will have access to unlimited solutions, creativity and yes, money! Read Online!

Jeanna Gabellini – Jeanna is a Master Business Coach who supports conscious entrepreneurs to double (and even triple) their profits by leveraging attraction principles, systems and fun. She is also the co-author of Life Lessons for Mastering the Law of Attraction, with Eva Gregory, Mark Victor Hansen & Jack Canfield. Grab your free CD “Transforming from Chaotic Entrepreneur to Conscious Leader” to get your personal prescription to ditch overwhelm and slide into profits. Learn more about Jeanna at www.MasterpeaceCoach.com

to profits, “When it comes trumps mindset always strategy.” abellini Jeanna G

CAREER/BUSINESS

I also have a strong focus on building abundance in my business savings. This is my cushion. Not for retirement, not for bills. I want to see that cushion and feel abundant.

than enough money, the more evidence appeared.

EMBRACE YOUR

Authentic Self IN

Life AND

Business BY MARYELLEN DE VINE

o many of us fall into the habit of living life through the different masks we wear and the roles we play. We often have preconceived notions as to how our roles are supposed to look. Some of us grew up with “June Cleaver” of the TV show “Leave it to Beaver” as the model mother and wife: dressed in pearls and an apron over a lovely dress, with an always-immaculate house. Others grew up with the ideal of being “Super Woman” with a career, a spouse, kids, a house…and all of it running perfectly. Regardless of who your model of womanhood was growing up, it may not be ideal for you today.

www.AspireMAG.net | April / May 2014

Do you feel you are being true to your authentic self? Do you appear on the outside as “June Cleaver”, but on the inside you yearn to take an African dance or belly dancing class? Perhaps it’s time to explore those yearnings! If it feels scary to jump right in and start showing your true self, you can choose to dip your toe into the water first. For example, you may typically wear a business suit to work, but instead of suddenly wearing a tiedyed flowing dress (lovely as it may be), you may wish to start by wearing a tie-dyed scarf with your suit. Or wear jewelry that shows a little more of the real you. Soon you should feel comfortable showing more and more of

Perhaps you’ve worn the masks of your different roles so long that you just aren’t sure who you really are anymore. That’s okay. Allow yourself to explore what piques your interest. Spend a little time with those explorations to see what blossoms. I recently found myself drawn to creativity and art, even though I had never thought of myself as a creative person or artist. I have been enjoying trying different kinds of art. Our art can tell us about ourselves, by the colors we choose or the shapes and strokes we make. When we let go of the need for our art to look a certain way, it opens us up to amazing possibilities. It’s the same with our lives. Playing with art has made my life much more colorful! I believe it’s the reason I felt inspired to have a few splashes of purple added to my dark brown hair. It lets some of my “true color” out. I suppose most people would say that I have a bit of a conservative look

to me, and I think that’s what’s so fun about having this shimmer of purple in my hair! I get so many wonderful comments on it. The consensus seems to be “how fun!” I hope my doing this gives others permission to do something similar: to show a little more of their “true color”. Being authentic also means following your dreams. Even if it’s not possible or practical at the moment, you can still keep your dreams alive. Perhaps you’ve always wanted to sing in a musical or visit Greece and the village your greatgrandparents came from. Take baby steps towards

inside. We just need to remember to connect with our Inner Wise One, the part of us that is connected to the Divine and receives Divine guidance. Yes, you can weigh the opinions and information you receive from others, but check in with what feels right for you. You can do this by getting calm and centered, meditating, doing some automatic writing or creative expression, or some other way you listen to your Inner Wise One. This is also true for business. There are many “blueprints” and strategies out there for how to run and market your business.

BEING AUTHENTIC ALSO MEANS FOLLOWING YOUR DREAMS. it. Create a vision board. Keep the dream alive! Another way of being authentic is listening to your own inner wisdom. So often we go to others to get their advice, forgetting that we really do have many of our own answers right

We can check in with our Inner Wise One to see which are best for us. As I embrace more of my Sacred Feminine side, I am finding that I need to follow the flow of energy that is present. Being authentic also means following our own inner rhythm,

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your true self. Maybe you’ll share at the water cooler your excitement over the new African dance class you recently joined!

remembering that there is an ebb and flow, and allowing ourselves to honor that. There are some days when I need to be in the quiet and stillness: being rather than doing. I must admit that this can still be challenging for me. I worry that I won’t accomplish what needs to get done, especially if there is a deadline I must meet. But I have found that following the energy works best for me. Many mentors would say to just push through and get it done. I have done that for quite a bit of my life and have ended up with adrenal fatigue because of it. There are days or weeks when I must embrace the story of the Tortoise and the Hare, and know that I will get there faster by slowing down. I remind myself that there will be other days and weeks when I am so inspired and can get so much accomplished quite easily. Authenticity is so important if you are an entrepreneur. How will your perfect clients ever know that you are perfect for them if you water yourself down? Let them feel your true essence. That’s what they will be attracted to most. Yes, your expertise and services will be of value, but there are probably many others out there offering the same thing. However, only you do it the way you do; with your own spin on it; with your essence infused into it.

HERE ARE A FEW WAYS TO BRING AUTHENTICITY INTO YOUR BUSINESS: Share yourself in your writing. Show your

personality in your blog posts and newsletters. Yes, you should be professional, but not so much that the

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readers aren’t able to get a sense of who you are. Share a few personal stories; show your humor or your edgy streak. Use analogies in your writing that come from your interests. If you love to cook, dance, scuba dive or paint, you can weave that in to show a bit of you.

Let them feel your essence in your branding. When someone visits your

website, do you think it evokes the feeling you wish for visitors to feel? Do you want them to feel inspired and uplifted? Perhaps you want them to feel that they’ve received useful tips and information. If your personality is bold, use bold colors. If you love nature, flowers, or animals, incorporate some of that in the images you use on your site. Use a photo of you that reflects your personality. Perhaps one that shows a little more of that light-hearted twinkle in your eye.

I’M SURE YOU’LL FEEL SO MUCH MORE ALIVE WHEN YOU EMBRACE YOUR AUTHENTIC SELF. GIVE IT A TRY! Read Online!

Maryellen De Vine - Maryellen is a wife, mother of three, and Coach/Teacher/Angel Therapy Practitioner® who understands the challenges of being a busy woman and soul-centered entrepreneur. She has created the “Sacred Success in Business” and “Replenish Your Spirit” programs, blending her gifts and tools, such as Angelic EFT and creativity. Visit Mary’s website at www.AngelicJourneys.com and claim your FREE 6 part Deluxe Sacred Success Kit.

Aligning with for Your

Highly Conscious BUSINESS BY JENNIFER LONGMORE

ver the last several years that I have been in business as a conscious entrepreneur, Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve learned that everything is energy, including business. There is a divine energy that moves through you AND your business, and when you learn how to activate it, channel it, and accelerate it, particularly in your business, it will create results beyond your wildest imagination. Imagine for a moment what might happen with your business when your personal energy is deeply rooted in fear, doubt and worry. Perhaps you feel like youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re swimming in molasses trying to make things happen. Or, perhaps you are not attracting the level (or type) of business you would like.

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Universal Laws

...when we are working with Universal Laws, we are in the same energetic space as our higher self and vice versa. We are already aligned. Now, imagine for a moment that you are joyful about what you are offering, you love what you do and who you serve, and you start each day with excitement and anticipation of all of the good things that are ready and waiting to come your way. Perhaps you attract an abundance of ideal opportunities, invitations, clients, and wealth on all levels. Perhaps you receive free press about how great your business is or an abundance of referrals. As a divine being of light-love, you have everything that you need and access to all that created you (and all that you are a part of). From this space of awareness then, you are able to see that you can access Source energy directly. This is where all truth resides; it is the 7th plane of existence. You truly are a multidimensional being. It is your divine birthright to access infinite love, light, abundance and so much more. Breathe that in! Just below the 7th plane, is the 6th plane of existence. This is where Universal Laws reside, your higher consciousness, higher councils and much more. These are the energies that support us in moving through the universe in a highly-conscious way (if we so choose). This space aligns us to the

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powerful partners and energies that support our existence in the universe. As you can see, when we are working with Universal Laws, we are in the same energetic space as our higher self and vice versa. We are already aligned.

Here are 6 of the Universal Laws to consider aligning with to create your highly conscious business:

The Law of Abundance

When we create images of abundance in our lives, we attract this energy into our reality. Abundance does not only apply to money. We also long for an abundance of love, relationships, peace, harmony, opportunities, faith, success and much more. Where are you longing for more abundance in your life?

The Law of Action

God works with us, not for us! We can be extremely gifted, talented, compassionate, deserving and so on, yet only action will materialize our wishes. Being a passive participant in our lives allows us to watch our life like a movie, whereas being an active participant allows us to star in the leading role. Which role do you choose?

The Law of Economy

This law governs energy (matter) and energy always follows the line of least resistance. When we try to make things happen that are not in our highest good or the highest good of all, those actions are met with resistance (the Law of Economy). Spending energy trying to overcome resistance and universal

The Law of Intention

Energy always follows intent. When we perform an act of kindness and our intention is to be recognized for our goodness, or we have a hidden agenda, we will not be rewarded through the universal Law of Grace. Intention and effort must be aligned in order to successfully manifest. When we intend to generate more money in our lives, and we reduce our spending on nonessentials and become more responsible with our money, we create more money. More importantly, when we demonstrate that we can handle more, the universe gives us more. This is the Law of Intention. How can you improve the intentions that you are setting in your life?

techniques? Successful manifestation occurs when these laws are present in our lives, so understanding and working with these laws is the first step. Ultimately, successful manifestation of anything is dependent upon: making a conscious choice of what we want; ensuring that we are wishing for what we truly want; seeing, speaking, and write our manifestations; giving thanks as though it has already happened; and, letting go and letting God, knowing that the universe will always bring us what is most appropriate and in our highest good and growth. So, imagine for a moment, how much energy it must take for us to work against the flow of this plane. Imagine for a moment what power awaits you if you can give yourself permission to step into partnership with the very energies that are aligned to support you.

The Law of Manifestation

When we think, visualize, and speak what we wish to manifest, as though it is already happening in our lives, we activate this law. Our manifestations need to be positively focused, emphasizing what we want to create, rather than what we do not want to create. What do you wish to create in your life today?

The Law of Three Requests

When we repeat what we are requesting of the universe three times, it activates the universal power of three and brings a stronger energy to what we intend to manifest. Often this accelerates this speed in which we attract what we have been requesting. How can you incorporate this law in your manifestation

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laws as we attempt to manifest is wasted energy that could be spent where there is flow and receptivity. The more energy we save, the more we have to spend on things that truly matter. Where do you need to shift the focus of your energy?

Creating this alignment takes little time and effort. Here is how to create your connection: 1. Affirm that you are willing to partner with Universal Laws 2. Choose the Universal Law that you wish to partner with in the moment (for this article we will work with the Universal Law of Abundance) 3. Set the intention that you are aligning and harmonizing with the wisdom of this law (for example) through all dimensions, spaces, times, levels of consciousness in the NOW in the most joyous, easy way and that the results are even greater than you could have hoped for. 4. Breathe that in. 5. Believe it to be so.

So, imagine what will release from your life and what will enter once you create this partnership with the Universal Law of Abundance (for example). If you are aligned with this law, you will release blame, shame, guilt, judgment and step into compassionate detachment with yourself and others.

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You will accept all that you have created up until now from a place of compassionate detachment, integrate the learnings and transform it into wisdom.You will step into an infinite awareness that you are deeply connected to all that is, realize your fullest abundant potential, and open your energy field for divine downloads (inspiration) and the people, experiences and energies needed to receive and live your most joyous and abundant life. You will be actively in conversation with your etheric forms of support, including Source, fully expressing your needs and desires and transforming into an attraction magnet for all that you desire. Using these steps to align with each of these Universal Laws will allow you to achieve quantum leaps in your highly conscious business and experience success and prosperity beyond what you could have even imagined.

Read Online!

Jennifer Longmore – North America’s Soul Purpose Expert, internationally acclaimed host of “Soul Purpose Central,” and best selling author, is world-renowned for her laser like clarity in seeing into the depths of your soul and bridging your connection to universal consciousness. She is a leading expert on Akashic Records and has served thousands of soul’s as founder of the Soul Journeys® School for Akashic Studies and the Soul Journeys® Method. It’s time to align to your soul’s purpose, shine your light, and effortlessly create a life (and business) beyond your wildest dreams. Claim your Free Soul Acceleration System at www.SoulJourneys.ca.

INSPIRED TO

Write?

Life

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TRUE YOU:

Open Up to and Writing BY LISA TENER

n a trip back from the San Francisco Writer’s Conference, I found myself inspired by a documentary and wrote a song. I found the experience surprising and soulnourishing in a way my other writing hadn’t been lately when I’d tried to write about the topic of my presentation—“The 6 Figure Writer”—even though I was truly excited about that topic, as well. Later, as I thought about that experience and other recent experiences writing poetry, I realized that a truer voice was coming out in those shorter pieces—the ones where I set aside expectation and just played with words, witnessing what came forth. One may call it an “authentic” voice. “Authentic” may seem like a buzz word nowadays. You see it almost everywhere—

on websites, in blog posts, social media and magazines. Why are we so taken with authenticity as of late? I believe we are being called to step out of the old mold of who we think we are and step into a truer—and more powerful— sense of ourselves. This authentic self has more to offer others and can bring a greater sense of fulfillment than other versions of you. But how do you access that authentic self? How do you:

• Make decisions • Speak • Work

• Connect • Love

...from that inner landscape of authenticity? It can feel vulnerable, unfamiliar, shaky. A great place to start is writing. You don’t have to share what you write with anyone. Give yourself permission to explore on your own with no one peeking over your shoulder. Writers often refer to a writer’s “voice.” Just today, my friend, Bonnie Leonard, told me she wasn’t sure she had a clear voice as a writer, but then someone who bought The Midlife Women’s Journal told her, “I could hear your voice as I read the book.” Clearly she’d achieved authenticity—the words “rang true” and the reader fully connected. So, how do you achieve that on the page? Here are three different tools for discovering your voice as a writer and—in the process— getting in touch with your authentic self:

Dig Deep into Detail: Authentic writing

Write beyond what you know: You can

Free Write:

Set a timer for 5 to 10 minutes. Just write as fast as you can in a notebook as your pen swiftly moves across the page without hesitation. Don’t take the pen off the paper. If thoughts come in, just include them in the writing without censor.

Write about the first thing that enters your mind. If another thought interrupts, write that down. When your timer rings, read what you wrote and see if something calls to you, or seems a particularly juicy spot to continue exploration. It might be a word, a phrase, a paragraph, an idea, or a page—follow it. Set your timer for another 10 minutes and explore the subject without editing or censoring—just write.

IF the censor’s voice—or critic’s voice—comes up, you can write it down and respond to it on the page (more writing). Repeat the process one more time.

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is true writing: the reader experiences your story come alive for them. If you write, “I felt nervous” or, “She turned the page slowly,” there’s little to make it come alive. But if you describe your arduous journey up to the speakers’ podium, sweat dripping from your fingers, your reader shares in your anxiety and the experience comes alive and connects you. Now, you’re reaching your reader and magic can happen—for the reader and for you. start your writing with what you know about something, but it truly becomes interesting and engaging when you explore beyond what you already know or planned to share. Allow for space to explore an aspect you hadn’t looked at before—perhaps a forgotten memory that surfaces as you write about that trip to the podium. Where does it lead you?

True authenticity is about being present. When you are present, you allow the creative force inside you to lead you—whether you are talking, teaching, writing listening, playing, working, singing or creating anything. Authenticity requires being open

to being led by the creative and wise forces within you that are nudging you deeper in your relationships with yourself and others.

Here are a few journal prompts to get you started. Choose a phrase that calls to you and write those words in your journal. See where they take you. I suggest writing with pen and paper to free you up.

e meal lik t a h t r be “I remem erday…” t s e y s a it w ” w faces… o d in w m oo “My bedr ed what r e d n o w ays “I’ve alw o…” be like t d l u o w it _____, _ _ _ _ _ _ ce _ “Ever sin sentment e r a d ore It I’ve harb _____. _ _ _ _ _ _ _ about started…” that…” h is w n e “I oft

• Don’t edit, just write—the faster the better. • Fill your writing with specific details. • Use different senses to convey details— hearing, touch, sight, taste and smell. • Let the writing—and your authentic self— lead you. Let go of trying to control the process for now. You’re not writing for anyone but you!

Read Online!

Lisa Tener – An award-winning authority on writing and publishing books, Lisa Tener guides you to joyfully express yourself in writing. She blogs for the Huffington Post, serves on the faculty of Harvard Medical School’s publishing course, and teaches her own Award Winning Book Writing Courses in person and by interactive teleseminar. Download your free Author Tool Kit at www.LisaTener.com

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Not only will authenticity make you a better writer, but a better partner, friend, employer, employee, spouse, parent, creator and human being.

Remember: