Aspire Magazine - Dec '13/Jan '14 Issue - Living a Life of Purpose by Aspire Magazine

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CONTENTS On the Cover

Jennifer Louden Jennifer Louden is the bestselling author of The Life Organizer: A Woman’s Guide to a Mindful Year, The Woman’s Comfort Book and many others. Jennifer is a personal coach and cultural visionary, harnessing her extraordinary ability to recognize women’s comfort as both a fundamental need and an innate desire. JEN’S COVER PHOTO: Darrah Parker Photography

http://www.darrahparker.com/

DECEMBER | JANUARY 2014 LIVING A LIFE OF PASSION AND PURPOSE Wisdom & Self-Growth 18 HOW TO STOP THE CYCLE OF OVERPROVIDING by Jennifer Louden Many of us are guilty of overproviding to the benefit of others at the cost to ourselves. Over-providing is a less than truthful existence and keeps you from giving birth to your truest life. It can be very difficult to recognize when you are over-providing. Here are some of the signs to watch for and to help you wake up to when it might be happening. 22 LIVING WITH PASSION AND PURPOSE by Dr. Jennifer Howard True passion flows from our very deepest source, our highest level of existence, our essence. It’s a calling, an ache inside that’s summoning

www.AspireMAG.net | December / January 2014

you to be the person you were meant to be, so you can make the contribution to this world only you can make. It’s this passion that’s moving you closer to your “purpose.” When rooted in your purpose, you can more easily tap into your true passion. 26 THE CREATIVE BEING CREED by Shiloh Sophia McCloud Shiloh Sophia McCloud is a visionary artist and teacher. She has dedicated the past twenty years of her to life art as a path of healing through painting, writing and teaching intentional creativity. At the core of her work is a belief that the right to self express is one of the most basic human rights – having access to what we think, feel, know, believe and want to create in our lives. Enjoy Shiloh’s beautiful Creative Being Creed.

CONTENTS

28 LIVING THE BIG STUFF: STEPPING INTO THE NEXT CHAPTER by Kristine Carlson As women we find ourselves in a stage of reinvention at different times in our lives for different reasons. This may mean you have to release the past and move into the unknown territory of self-discovery to receive a new dream. Whatever brings you to this place in your life of crossroads; you are one step closer to realizing your next great chapter of life and embracing change as you “live the big stuff!”

“Your purpose in life is to find your purpose and give your whole heart and soul to it.” BUDDHA

32 SIMPLY EMPOWERED... HOW WOULD A WOMAN REACT? by Crystal Andrus The next time you find yourself in a situation where the old wounds want to pop up and remind you of feeling unworthy or unwanted, remind yourself that you’re a woman now! You are teaching people how to treat you by the way you treat yourself! Crystal shares the powerful wisdom behind the acronym she created using the word WOMAN. Use it to remind you of how you want to respond in challenging times: Like a woman would!

36 THE RICHNESS OF LIVING A PURPOSEFUL LIFE by Maryellen De Vine Life Coach, Angel Therapy Practitioner® and Founder of Angelic Journeys Maryellen De Vine shares five ways you can get started opening to the magic and richness of your own Spirit-filled, purposeful life.

CONTENTS 39 RAISING YOUR GODDESS CONSCIOUSNESS by M. J. Abadie When we listen and pay attention to the still small voice, we hear the voice of the Goddess. The directions we need most often come from within, yet they can be mirrored by what is happening without. The question is: How can we sort through our multiplicity of feelings, sensations, intuitions, thoughts, and reactions to get to the core of the matter? The answer is through reflection. Consciousness thrives in the silence of reflection.

“When you lost sight of your path, listen for the destination in your heart.” KATSURA HOSHINO

Health & Wellness 42 LIVING THE GODDESS LIFESTYLE: I DID IT MY WAY! by Lisa Marie Rosati Most likely you think you’ve heard it all when it comes to ‘discovering and living your purpose’ and how important it is to do so. Lisa Marie shares her maverick thought about “purpose”: You’re already living your purpose… and your purpose will most likely change and evolve many times over the course of your lifetime! Discover how you have been living on purpose all along and take some time to dive deeper with these introspective journaling questions .

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46 PRACTICE YOGA WITH INTENTION: A GUIDE TO CHOOSING THE RIGHT STYLE FOR THE NEW YEAR by Meagan McCrary Whether you want to become lithe and toned,

address specific health issues, gain more clarity, develop a sense of peace, discover your life’s purpose or whatever it is — choosing a yoga style that supports your intention for the New Year is essential for staying on course. Here is an overview of the yoga style best suited for your intention. Whether it’s becoming svelte with Ashtanga-vinyasa yoga or developing more self-acceptance and compassion with Kripalu yoga there’s a yoga style for you.

CONTENTS 49 IS IT PERIMENOPAUSE? by Mary E. Pritchard, Ph. D. We all know to look for hot flashes and night sweats as early signs of menopause. But did you know that the earliest signs of perimenopause are often psychological or spiritual in nature? Women may suffer for years with early signs of hormonal imbalance and not even know it. Learn more about these important signs and what they mean.

“You were put on this earth to achieve your greatest self, to live out your purpose, and to do it fearlessly.” STEVE MARABOLI

52 THE WISE WOMAN WAY: LIVING A LIFE OF PURPOSE by Susun Weed The purpose of our lives differs from the goals of our lives. We strive to achieve goals; purpose carries us. We must think up goals; purpose is inherent and without thought. We each have different goals, and different ways of achieving the same goals, but we all have the same purpose: To share love and create joy.

Relationships 56 8 KEYS TO CREATING A LOVING, JOYFUL RELATIONSHIP by Margaret Paul, Ph.D. Do you believe that if you have to work on a relationship, it’s not the right relationship for you? It’s not true. However, “working on a relationship,” doesn’t mean that it has to be hard. It primarily means that you continually learn and grow toward being an evermore-loving person. While we don’t need to be in a relationship to continue to evolve toward being more loving, relationships trigger all that is unhealed within us, thereby offering us wonderful opportunities for healing and growth. Here are eight keys that are essential in creating a joyful, loving relationship.

CONTENTS 60 5 SECRETS OF A HEALTHY MARRIAGE by Shann Vander Leek In The Five Secrets of a Healthy Marriage, Transformation Goddess, Shann Vander Leek shares her formula for enjoying a healthy, fun and longlasting partnership. Married to her beloved Thomas for 21 years, Shann is walking her talk and enjoying the blessings of a great relationship. 63 COLORSCOPE by Elizabeth Harper Colorscope is a unique system designed to stimulate your intuitive skills. By choosing the color you are most drawn to you actively access the wisdom of your subconscious and the voice of your soul.

â&#x20AC;&#x153;Built into you is an internal guidance system that shows you the way home. All you need to do is heed the voice.â&#x20AC;? NEALE DONALD WALSCH

Career | Business 66 INTERVIEW WITH THE MARKETING GODDESS: ELIZABETH PURVIS by Linda Joy In this empowering interview, Elizabeth Purvis shares some great tips on creating a thriving business and why she is so passionate about teaching and empowering women how to magnetize their desires and create their lives and businesses exactly as they wish to live it. Elizabeth is recognized as a leader in the emerging teaching of feminine energy in business and is a mentor to thousands of conscious women entrepreneurs around the world.

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69 DOING BUSINESS LIKE A GODDESS: GRATITUDE FIRST! by Elizabeth Purvis In this continuing series, Elizabeth shares the 4th key concept for doing business like a Goddess: Gratitude First as well as 10 ways to practice gratitude. When you make the commitment to LIVE in gratitude, it will create a space for you to experience the ultimate blessing: to change your life while transforming the lives of others through your business.

CONTENTS

“Truth is not something outside to be discovered, it is something inside to be realized.” OSHO

74 INSPIRED TO WRITE? THE BOSS FROM HELL AND OTHER GIFTS FROM THE UNIVERSE by Lisa Tener National Book Coach Lisa Tener shares how her path to living a life of passion and purpose revealed itself slowly. Lisa shares how clarity came in incremental steps, gentle promptings and small synchronicities and the lessons learned on her journey.

LINDA JOY

Publisher & Editor-In-Chief | Linda@aspiremag.net

Creative & Brand Direction || RACHEL DUNHAM | www.HummingbirdCreativeConcepts.com Editorial Layout || MANDY GATES | www.GruveDesign.com Graphic Designer || MANDY GATES | www.GruveDesign.com COO || KIM TURCOTTE | www.SoulPurposeBusinessSolutions.com MAILING ADDRESS || P.O. BOX 1149 | LAKEVILLE, MA 02347 | 508.265.7929 ADVERTISING || Email Linda@aspiremag.net MISSION TO INSPIRE INFO <CLICK HERE>

EXPERT COLUMNISTS CRYSTAL ANDRUS Simply... Empowered!

KRISTINE CARLSON Living the Big Stuff TM

Crystal Andrus is a leader in the field of self-discovery and personal transformation. From a tough beginning—she has risen to become a best-selling Hay House author, international speaker, women’s health advocate, spokesperson for Haylo Health, and Founder of The SWAT Institute. Crystal’s message is one of resilience, strength and inner power. www.CrystalAndrus.com www.SWATInstitute.com

An unyielding believer of Living the Big StuffTM and not sweating the small stuff in order to experience true happiness in life, as a bestselling author and inspirational speaker Kristine Carlson continues to expand on the phenomenal success of her late husband, Dr. Richard Carlson, beloved author of the Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff series. www.KristineCarlson.com www.DontSweatMoms.com

ELIZABETH HARPER ColorScope

ELIZABETH PURVIS Doing Business Like a Goddess

Elizabeth Harper is an internationally acclaimed teacher, intuitive, healer, and the author of the award winning book Wishing: How to Fulfill Your Hearts Desires. Elizabeth is on the faculty at the highly acclaimed Omega Institute in Rhineback, NY and is invited to speak around the world. www.SealedwithLove.com

Elizabeth Purvis shows spirit-led, missiondriven women how to price, package and market their services so they create extraordinary income and impact. Known for blending heart-centered sales, Internet marketing, spiritual principles and Universal Law, Elizabeth delivers simple ways for her clients to double or triple revenues by creating multiple streams of income and enrolling ideal clients at higher fees. www.MarketingGoddess.com

LISA MARIE ROSATI Living the Goddess LifeStyleTM

LISA TENER Inspired to Write?

Passionista Lisa Marie Rosati is an Inner Goddess Catalyst for women and the Creatrix of The Goddess Lifestyle Plan. Lisa mentors women on how become a Modern Day Goddess by consciously designing a luscious Goddess life, cultivating radiant health and creating a lucrative business using and directing their feminine fire. www.GoddessLifestylePlan.com

SUSUN WEED The Wise Woman Way

An award-winning authority on writing and publishing books, Lisa Tener guides you to joyfully express yourself in writing. She blogs for the Huffington Post, serves on the faculty of Harvard Medical School’s publishing course, and teaches her own Award Winning Book Writing Courses in person and by interactive teleseminar. www.LisaTener.com

Susun Weed is an internationally renowned herbalist, author, and director of the Wise Woman Center in New York. She is a revered voice of the Wise Woman Tradition, where women’s bodies and women’s emotions are valued. Susun is a founding grandmother of the herbal renaissance and the originator of the concept of complementary medicine. www.SusunWeed.com

www.AspireMAG.net | December / January 2014

FEATURED CONTRIBUTORS

JENNIFER LOUDEN

DR. JENNIFER HOWARD

SHILOH SOPHIA MCCLOUD

MARYELLEN DE VINE

MEAGAN MCCRARY

MARY E. PRITCHARD, PH. D., HHC

MARGARET PAUL, PH. D.

SHANN VANDER LEEK

JEN LOUDEN PHOTO CREDIT: Darrah Parker Photography

http://www.darrahparker.com/

YOUR WISDOM! WITH OUR READERS

LETTER EDITOR

FROM THE

”Once a woman becomes aware of forces that influence her, she gains the power that knowledge provides.”” JEAN SHINODA BOLEN

Welcome to the December2013/January2014 “Living a Life of Passion and Purpose” issue!

I’ve come to believe that each and every one of us yearn to discover the purpose of our lives and to be able to passionately pursue it. My personal definition of a ‘life of purpose’ is about living a life of meaning, joy and passion that aligns our goals with our values and leads us to consciously create our lives from a place of meaning and intention. Jennifer Louden, (cover) exemplifies a woman living her purpose. As the leading expert on the concept of “comfort” and self-care for women, Jennifer’s mission continues to transform as women’s roles and voices have evolved. From a well-read self-help author to a cultural leader and life guide, Jennifer continues to live her truth inspiring women to develop their own recipe for emotional, physical, spiritual and work-life balance. You’ll discover nuggets of wisdom, hope and inspiration throughout the pages of this issue of Aspire Magazine. From Dr. Margaret Paul’s Living a Life of Passion and Purpose to Is it Perimenopause? by Mary E. Pritchard, Ph.D., HHC, this issue is filled with feminine wisdom to support you on your journey of self-empowerment, self-love and inspired living.

Connect with me! om/ http://www.Facebook.c lindajoyinspires

om/

http://www.facebook.c PublisherLindaJoy

Invitation to Visionary business women, Coaches and Authors: If

you are here to serve, inspire and empower women through your heartcentered business, I invite you to learn more about joining me and some of my visionary gal pals for THE spirit-led, heart-centered collaborative list-building project of the year! LEARN MORE

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LINDA JOY Publisher & Editor-In-Chief | Linda@aspiremag.net

Here’s What I’m Reading Right Now...

FROM MY BOOKSHELF

The Life Organizer: A Woman’s Guide to a Mindful Year By Jennifer Louden This powerful book is all about organizing from the ‘inside out’! Jennifer Louden’s Life Organizer is a datebook for the soul that helps women create the life they want.

WISDOM & SELF-GROWTH Read Online!

“The purpose of life is not to be

happy. It is to be useful, to be honorable, to be compassi onate, and to have it make some difference that you have lived and liv ed well.”

Ralph Waldo Emerson

Discerning the Difference Between

ulse p Im d n a n io it u t In BY CARI MURPHY

So, how do we know if the inner voice we’re listening to is actually our intuition and not something else, like a sudden impulse? It is a fascinating and important question to address on our journey through life. I personally feel that when we pay attention to that still small intuitive voice that attempts to guide us from moment to moment, we remain on our soul’s path with conscious intent and deliberate action. The challenge we face lies in determining what voice we’re listening to! It can be challenging to determine whether we’re receiving guidance or advice from our intuition/higher self or just the impulsive tendency that stems from our own logic or ego. It can be difficult to discern the difference if we know what signs to look for. AspireMag.net Read the full article online.

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l Live & Virtua

UPCOMING EVENTS

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How to Stop the Cycle of

OVER-PROVIDING BY JENNIFER LOUDEN

define over-providing as giving more than is personally sustainable for you and often giving for the wrong reasons. Accurate but kind of bland. A better definition is from my friend Jeanie, “Over-providing? That’s when you’re pouring everything into growing everybody else while withering yourself.” Withering yourself. Yes that’s what you do when, instead of bringing the requested two sides to the family holiday dinner, you show up with five sides, a salad, two pies, gravy and a ham. Withering yourself is hosting a fund-raiser for your favorite cause, spending weeks hand-crafting the food, the decorations and all the details (even though there are other volunteers), and ending up in bed for two weeks with pneumonia. Withering yourself is inviting your elderly mom to move in with you, even though she has a support system and enough money for good care, and find yourself gaining weight, neglecting your creative passions, and cultivating a big ole’ grudge.

www.AspireMAG.net | December / January 2014

Obviously, over-providing is not in your best interests and yet we all do it, at least some of the time. Why oh why?

• You were raised in a culture that still proclaims good women give endlessly and good men provide.

• Your

biology –humans are hardwired to belong. Over-providing keeps you in the tribe.

• You’re empathetic. You care. You want to help. How to determine how much is enough?

• You

may believe what you want to give isn’t worthwhile enough (whether that’s your ideas or your presence or your love) so you gush like a broken fire hydrant lots of other things – money, meals, advice, time - to make up for what you lack.

SIGNS LIKE:

• A hollow feeling of never getting enough done

• Overly

focused on what others think of you

• A jittery compulsion to fix people’s

pain, to do something to make it better

• Feeling

lonely even when you have friends and family around

• Doubting

other’s intentions “They only love me because I do so much for them”

Resentment •

– everybody else gets what they want but you

• You might forget you’re a human

• Frustrated and paralyzed, feeling

• Perhaps, in the past, over-providing

• Hearing

with human limits of time and energy, easy to do in these uber speedy times. kept you safe from harm.

• You haven’t learned (yet) to trust your self, to trust your body and heart when it says, “Enough.”

like you go around and around in a circle on your own dreams and desires

yourself say things like “When I finish ____ then I will” and “I just had to do ____ for _____ who else would?” and “If I don’t do ______ I will be a big failure, get fired and end up homeless and…”

WISDOM & SELF-GROWTH

HERE ARE A FEW OF OUR COMPELLING REASONS:

Also, over-providing can be very difficult to recognize. Your family of origin, your religious background, even where you work, can give you strong messages about how much to give. Most of us believe, at least a little, that we are worthwhile for what we do, not who we are. Because it’s tricky to know when you are over-providing, it’s good to know some of the signs to help you wake up to when it might be happening.

Now before we move onto the antidotes to over-providing, I’ll address the idea that over-providing at work is the only way to succeed. But what research actually shows is the people who have the highest impact link authentic regard for others’ interests – co-workers, customers, colleagues - while also taking care of their own interests. In other words, they don’t abandon their own desires, they tend both. Wharton professor Adam Grant, author Give & Take: A Revolutionary Approach to Success, calls this “otherish giving.” Yes, this applies to clients, customers, and especially, children. Okay, hopefully I’ve convinced you, at least a little, that over-providing is not the best choice for your health, your career, or your sanity. Now what to do?

SAMPLE ONE OR TWO (NO MORE!) OF THESE SIMPLE BALANCING ANTIDOTES:

• Write

down everything you do for others in a 24 hour period.

This is far harder than it seems. If you have a lot of resistance, you may be deeply identified with over-providing as in “This is what makes me me!” or you may be so exhausted by over-doing that you need a nap. Either way, notice why you refuse to do this.

• Start

the day with five minutes of extravagant self-praise.

Read emails extolling your amazing virtues, recall compliments in vivid detail, shower gratitude on yourself for

specific things you did or didn’t do (I tell myself “Hey, good on you for not having any gluten at the party!”). Imagine this praise in the form of hummingbirds streaming into the back of your heart.

• Navigate by desire.

Make a practice of asking, “What do I want?” or “What would I really love to do here?” before say yes to something. Learning to know what you want, even if you can’t have it, is a life changing practice and one I teach in more depth in my book, The Life Organizer.

• Deputize a few beloveds to check in with before you say yes to something else.

My husband Bob and my Brain Trust (my mastermind group) must hear from me before I commit to a project or a teaching gig. I might still say yes even if they counsel no but at least I stopped long enough to make my case. Hearing yourself try to talk yourself into something can be pretty enlightening.

• Test reality

Is it true if you say no to your sister when she asks you to work for free in her store she’ll never speak to you again? Is it true that if you stop trading your coaching services for inferior admin help you will be overwhelmed and die? Take one fear of the disaster and do something different – say no, ask for what you want, etc. Note in writing what was the actual result?

• Get used to saying, “Let me get back to you.”

www.AspireMAG.net | December / January 2014

Make a list of all the reasons you must do this. Then go down the list asking, “Is that true?”

When faced with a decision or choice, ask yourself before you ask anyone else, “What do I think? What do I want?” We develop self-trust by checking in with ourselves (a key part of the Life Organizing practice from my book and app), taking action on our best guess, and then asking, “What do I know now?” We do not develop self-trust by saying, “Obviously, I can’t trust myself because I thought X was the right choice and it wasn’t.” That’s not self-trust, that’s being a psychic.

It’s tempting to get your kicks from being everything to everybody. It can be hard to believe there is another way and, once you see your pattern, you also see how overproviding is a less than truthful existence. It keeps you from giving birth to your truest life. Seeing that, painful as it can be, will motivate you to listen and choose the middle way – a little me, a little them – more often.

• Learn your over-providing triggers.

Exhaustion? Criticism? Being shamed? When you know your triggers, you may still over-provide but you’ll know why, and in time, that makes it easier to stop.

• Forget hard and fast rules.

Some situations call for over-giving for a period of time. When my dad was dying, it was important to overprovide for him. When I moved my mom into assisted living because of her Alzheimer’s, it was good to fuss over her for a couple of weeks. The guideline? Are you checking in with yourself? Are you choosing mindfully? If you want to give more, are you capable of doing so without hurting yourself?

• Yes,

avoiding over-providing is a privileged problem.

The woman in sub-Saharan Africa who

Read Online!

Jennifer Louden - The best-selling author of The Life Organizer: A Woman’s Guide to Mindful Year (out in paperback in December 2013), The Woman’s Comfort Book, The Couple’s Comfort Book, The Pregnant Woman’s Comfort Book, The Woman’s Retreat Book, and Comfort Secrets for Busy Women. She is both a personal coach and social commentator, who has taken the concept of “comfort” and selfcare, and made these essential concepts irresistible and essential to women around the world. Jennifer is a cultural visionary, harnessing her extraordinary ability to recognize women’s comfort as both a fundamental need and an innate desire. Purchase your copy of the paperback version of the The Life Organizer, and receive the Life Organizer Sanity Support Kit. Grab a copy today at JenniferLouden.com/lifeorganizer.

WISDOM & SELF-GROWTH

• Deepen your practice of self-trust.

spends two hours walking one-way to gather muddy water doesn’t get to choose how much she gives. And that isn’t an argument for you to be a martyr. Instead, become a force of love and balance in the world in hopes that one day all people can choose an emotionally and physically sustainable life.

Living with

Passion&

PURPOSE BY DR. JENNIFER HOWARD

“Passion is energy. Feel the power that comes from focusing on what excites you.” — OPRAH WINFREY

ith authenticity and integrity, you sink more deeply into who you truly are, which naturally leads to living with greater passion. Yet the word passion has been bandied about so much it feels watered down and has lost its deeper meaning. Passion runs the gamut from a strong liking or deep interest to intense, boundless enthusiasm; or it could be a conviction that drives you to have, do, or be something, or contribute your gifts to the world. People talk about their passion for hobbies and entertainment, such as sports, collecting shoes, gaming, gardening, or a favorite TV program. Some of these supposed passions are external hungers and addictions used to avoid difficult or painful feelings, taking you away from your essence and deeper self. Being conscious helps us discern the difference between addictive thinking and

our deepest sense of passion. The voice of addictions, even the softer ones, tell us it’s a good idea to do, think, imbibe, or say something that’s ultimately destructive. That’s not true passion. Yes, passion comes from desires, but where are they coming from inside of you, and where are they leading you? Are they leading you to discerning awareness, openness, and fulfillment, or to more impossible-to-fill hungers? True passion flows from our very deepest source, our highest level of existence, our essence. It’s a calling, an ache inside that’s summoning you to be the person you were meant to be, so you can make the contribution to this world only you can make. It’s this passion that’s moving you closer to your “purpose.”

www.AspireMAG.net | December / January 2014

“Passions change and morph over time as one comes oneself more deeply.” — CHRIS ATTWOOD AND JANET BRAY ATTWOOD

Your purpose is your raison d’être, your reason to be, to exist here and now. It’s not just about action and what you create; it applies to who you are. Coming from your purpose helps create a life and lifework rooted in your passion, smoothing out the effort it takes to be successful. Purpose and passion generate the inspiration needed to pursue your personal and professional goals. When rooted in your purpose, you can more easily tap into your true passion. Authors Chris Attwood and Janet Bray Attwood, of The Passion Test, have seen that “Passions change and morph over time as one comes to know and understand oneself more deeply.” As we grow and change we become clearer about who we are, and what we truly want and need, and find ways to make our lives, relationships, and careers better. We develop healthier and more conscious relationships based on mutual respect, sharing, and trust. We communicate openly and honestly, admitting our mistakes and accepting responsibility for ourselves. In our intimate relationships, both partners are equal, sharing power and control. We listen to each other with respect, valuing the other’s opinions. We support each other’s goals and life’s purpose, and the right to have different points of view, activities, friends, and interests.

What is your vision for your greatest life? Success is relative, and each person has his or her own vision of happiness, fulfillment, and realized goals. Yet we’ve integrated enough to confidently know that whatever happens, we’ll figure it out, because our mature, adult self will take care of it. If something seems too big to handle, we trust our inner resources to embrace the uncertainty. We know we’ll find the external resources needed to grow and change.

“True passio n flows from our very dee pest source, our highest level of existence, our essence.” Dr. Jenn ifer How ard

WISDOM & SELF-GROWTH

to know and understand

As you follow your inner longings, you might have the desire to find work you feel more passionate about, looking to be a more conscious businessperson. If you haven’t found, or created, the job of your dreams yet, you can probably find an aspect of your current work that taps into your passion. Motivated by purpose and passion, you’re led to approach all facets of business more consciously. Finding where your particular skills fit best allows you to contribute your unique gifts. This leads to inner fulfillment and a life that feels so rich you’re naturally inspired to serve and make a positive difference in the world.

MEDITATION: THE GIFTS OF ESSENCE Breathe deeply. Let go of all the internal chatter, even if only for a moment. Now feel the letting go in your belly. Bring yourself back to your breath. As best you can, allow yourself to sink into the silence and stillness that’s always available. Allow your whole body to experience the silence as you breathe. Even if you hear noise, feel the presence of silence, of stillness. Go into the silence, the quiet, the stillness, breathing. Simply allow yourself to deeply rest for a moment. The everpresent stillness surrounds you and feeds you as you breathe. It’s in perfect harmony with you. Stillness breathes you. Allow whatever’s coming up to just be as it is. Imagine for a moment that you’re offering the gifts of your essence to the world. Your gifts spring forth from the depths of your essence, from the depths of your heart and soul. Feel what that’s like. You know your essence and you can share it with others. Now, see if you can allow the world to receive your gifts. Just breathe and notice what you’re feeling in your body. What emotions might be coming up, what thoughts? Notice what you see. You’re giving from your essence. Notice anything else about this experience. Sit with this for a while.

Read Online!

Dr. Jennifer Howard - A licensed psychotherapist, energy healer, and spiritual teacher. She’s the author of the multiple award-winning book, Your Ultimate Life Plan, a Huffington Post blogger, and the host of the popular radio talk show, A Conscious Life. Visit her website, www.DrJenniferHoward.com, for meditations, articles, and free gifts.

Reprinted, with permission of the publisher, from YOUR ULTIMATE LIFE PLAN: HOW TO DEEPLY TRANSFORM YOUR EVERYDAY EXPERIENCE AND CREATE CHANGES THAT LAST © 2013 Dr. Jennifer Howard. Published by New Page Books a division of Career Press, Pompton Plains, NJ. 800227-3371. All rights reserved.

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I share my creations only when I feel supported to do so, not needing or seeking acknowledgement from others.

I answer the call to create, without feeling I am taking anything away from something or someone.

I release myself from the need to feel inspired before I begin, trusting that everything I need to create will be provided.

Woman Rising by Shiloh Sophia McCloud

I know that I have something to say and create, that is only mine to express, and so it is original.

I surrender the idea that my works of art must be pretty, good or saleable, and let them be what they want to be. I consider the practice of creativity equal to other practices like prayer or meditation or exercise and I make time for it.

I allow myself to release the critic and perfectionist with love and invite the muse to come to my side. I accept the healing energy that comes from my creative acts, I remind myself that it is OK to not know what I am doing, Creativity is a journey, and I honor that journey with my time, my resources and my heart. I am gentle with myself when I havenâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t taken the time to create, and I will begin again. I give myself permission to be messy, loud, irreverent at times, and at others to be quiet, orderly, mindful and to feel blessed.

www.AspireMAG.net | December / January 2014

WISDOM & SELF-GROWTH

I feel worthy of the title, Artist, just because I create, regardless of what I create, or what the outcome is.

A Time for Blooming by Shiloh Sophia McCloud

I am free to think my own thoughts, to have my own visions I also gather nourishment from those around me.

I feel that my life is a great adventure always looking for my YES, and that my own journey holds the makings of personal legend! I believe in intentional creativity; that the love I put into my work goes out as a blessing toward my intention.

Read Online!

Shiloh Sophia McCloud - A visionary artist and teacher. She has dedicated the past twenty years of her to life art as a path of healing through painting, writing and teaching intentional creativity. Through her art galleries, representing hundreds of women artists internationally, she has brought the work of exploring the feminine archetype into a methodology of personal transformation. At the core of her work is a belief that the right to self express is one of the most basic human rights – having access to what we think, feel, know, believe and want to create in our lives. Claim Shiloh’s FREE Tea with the Muse – 5 Step Painting class.

I am a creative being, not a creative doing, and sometimes being creative is allowing myself to “do nothing” except the act of dreaming.

LIVING the

Big Stuff !

Stepping into

THE NEXT

Chapter BY KRISTINE CARLSON

s women we find ourselves in a stage of reinvention at different times in our lives for different reasons. You may be recently divorced or widowed, or changing jobs or pursuing a different career, or maybe you are like me and suddenly that long awaited (and dreaded) empty nest is here. Whatever brings you to this place in your life of crossroads; you are one step closer to realizing your next great chapter of life and embracing change as you “live the big stuff!” This may mean you have to release the past and move into the unknown territory of self-discovery to receive a new dream. This may also confront you with some healing work as you release the suffering and pain of what it means to be in what most people consider an identity crisis. I prefer to see this time as a rebirth and letting go of the pain and suffering that comes from being attached to an identity. One of my favorite Wayne Dyer quotes is: “When you are what you do, when you don’t, you aren’t.” Boy, doesn’t that sum it up perfectly what happens to us when we are over-identified with our roles in life?

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caught in negative self-talk about how you don’t have any time to pursue your dreams? Are you incapacitated right now because of your perceived circumstances, or are you immobile because of your many choices? In order to shift your agreement with reality, you need to be present and aware of your thoughts and the stories you tell yourself like audio and visual tapes that are played over and over in your mind. If you are feeling stuck, perhaps it is the story you tell yourself that has locked you with resistance on a hamster-wheel and circular thinking that turns round and round. Perhaps your repetitive cycle of thoughts has you stuck in this rut you find yourself?

Through your story you can also become self-aware understanding that the culmination of the events in our lives shape our beliefs and our ideas about who we think we are.

There are many questions to consider about the kind of relationship you have with yourself. Are your thoughts kind, gentle and loving when you talk to yourself? Or are you harsh, angry and berating? Are you ignited by the passion you feel or are you

Early in my experience of loss, I had a telephone conversation with another widow. I had called her company to repair a minor dent in my car. I’m not sure how it came up that I had recently lost my husband, but she began to share with me how she was also a widow and how her husband had died in a freak jet-ski accident. As she shared her drama, it felt as though his death was very recent. She was crying and talking about how hard it has been; understandably, she was left to be a single mom, running his business and raising their young children. I was shocked to find out it had been five years since the accident. Five years later, the pain was palpable. She suffered like

WISDOM & SELF-GROWTH

Each of us has a story to share that marks a journey. There is tremendous power in your story to teach others. Through your story you can also become self-aware understanding that the culmination of the events in our lives shape our beliefs and our ideas about who we think we are. And, whatever story you tell yourself about yourself reveals itself in your agreement with reality. Each of us views the world through a filter, a set of eyeglasses so to speak. Your perception of reality becomes the experiences of your life. Even in your D.N.A there are those threads of experiences that have woven together to define your life like a fine piece of art that comes together in a tapestry that reveals a life story and a lineage. Here’s the clincher: Your thoughts about who you are affect your actions and how you show up in your love relationships, your work, and ultimately in the most important relationship you have, which is the one you have with yourself. It behooves us to clear our heads of wrong thinking. (That kind of thought pattern that is self-destructive rather than self-propagating.)

it was a fresh wound of yesterday. My personal insight was quick and swift like a light bulb that turned on. I realized I could easily be this woman five years from now if I got stuck where I was in my story of feeling sorry for myself for very much the same reasons this woman had. In this moment my story shifted into that of a “Shero.” I decided that no matter what I would overcome this suffering and move forward, knowing it would take some time to heal. At this point, early on, I began to form a very powerful agreement with reality that told myself I would go through the valley of darkness as the warrior I am praying and hoping with all my heart to some day, return to joy. Releasing control can be difficult. I wasn’t very good at it, until I realized through Richard’s sudden death that having control is merely illusion. Joseph Campbell says: “You must give up the life you’ve planned in order to have the one that is waiting for you.” Letting go of your past does not mean you lose your history. It means that you step into each day fresh, without attachment at the ego level, as a new person, born again, embracing this day with the eyes of wonder offering your presence to this moment right here, right now. Your story is valuable; you are all of it and you are none of it in the present moment. As you release the pain and suffering of the wounded heart (and that part of your story), you can let go, hence creating space for new thoughts to form and a new chapter to be revealed. It’s the noticing and the awareness of your thoughts that shift the pattern. We call in grace when we surrender control and allow our lives to unfold into the present

moment. This is the beauty of the feminine journey that nothing is for naught and it is all fluid like water. No matter what your story is about your life or what your circumstances appear to be, as you move forward and step into a new dream, picture yourself at the ocean’s edge walking along the seashore, carrying bright colorful balloons representing the events of your life and all aspects of who you are that you carry with you. You are feeling every grain of sand in your toes as you leave footprints where you walk. You are open, your heart soaring with every crashing wave at your feet. As you step and feel the breeze and salt air, each step moves you forward into a new adventure. The more present you are, the more in tuned and self aware you can be to this new relationship you have with yourself. The next chapter of your life will be revealed as you continue to step in, and through personal growth and self-awareness, you can reinvent your universe from where you are now—and who knows, you may just find yourself creating bliss. Read Online!

Kristine Carlson – An unyielding believer of Living the Big StuffTM and not sweating the small stuff in order to experience true happiness in life, as a bestselling author and inspirational speaker Kristine Carlson continues to expand on the phenomenal success of her late husband, Dr. Richard Carlson, beloved author of the Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff series. Learn more at www.KristineCarlson.com and be sure to download your Free Mom’s C.P.R. Kit at www.DontSweatMoms.com.

www.AspireMAG.net | December / January 2014

Do You Want the Most Effective & Secret Tools for More Fulfillment in Life? Go to: yourpowerbreakthrough.com Download your Free Audio instantly: “My Powerful Guided Meditation: to Soothe, Calm and Center Yourself for Your Goals Ahead.”

SIMPLY

Empowered!

How Would a

Woman REACT? W

BY CRYSTAL ANDRUS

e’ve all had that relationship that goes from “hero to zero” in no time flat— whether it be with a friend, family member, or lover—that leaves us wondering what the heck just happened. Truth be told, it’s hard not to take it personally. It’s too easy to feel badly about ourselves.

“What did I say?” “Where did I go wrong?” “Why doesn’t (s)he want me?” Rejection can do a head-job on us. It spins us back to the same old hurt feelings we had when we were young and someone was mean to us . . . (it doesn’t matter that we’re all grown up now). And that’s the trouble . . .

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We are all grown up now and although “sticks and stones may break our bones and names will never hurt us” (at least that’s what my mom always told me), we’re feeling pretty badly about ourselves. Words can hurt. Rejection hurts. Betrayal hurts. Abandonment hurts. Life is full of hurts. So how do we stop the hurt from making us heartless . . . or the wounds from making us bitter rather than better?

We use my acronym for the word

WOMAN!

That’s what we do! I created an acronym using the word WOMAN because ultimately that is how we want to respond: Like a woman would! Not a helpless child! Not a domineering matriarch! Not a rebellious, wounded teenager. A Woman! The next time you find yourself in a situation where the old wounds want to pop up and remind you of feeling unworthy or unwanted, remind yourself that you’re a woman now! You are teaching people how to treat you by the way you treat yourself!

When rejection hits, use this acronym to pull yourself up and back out into the world. (Sure, life may have some painful experiences to teach us things about ourselves, but all in all, it’s a really wonderful place!):

W What do you want to feel? What are your intentions? Get very clear on what it is you want to feel, experience, and achieve: Happiness? Peace? Self-acceptance? Selflove? It works best to write your intentions down in a journal, to give “voice” to them.

O Overlook the Obvious. Look under the “surface stuff” to see what’s really going on. Don’t be fooled by outward appearances or the details we can get caught up in. Most people have their own agenda (which goes something like this: “I need to take care of me.”). They really aren’t trying to hurt you and although they say things they probably don’t mean, they have their own wounds and are doing the best to deal with their own lives. Don’t take it personally.

WISDOM & SELF-GROWTH

As much as the momentary “vent” releases your pent up emotions, the longterm damage of aggressive behavior can be hard for others to ever overcome.

Manage Your Emotions. You may want to cry, yell, or freak out, but it won’t make the situation better. Once you know what you want to feel, focus on shifting yourself to that higher place. Ask yourself, “What would courage have me do?” See if you can take the “30,000 foot view” on the situation by becoming an observer rather than a participant in the dilemma. Things look clearer the higher up we go. Don’t give your power away by losing your cool. As much as the momentary “vent” releases your pent up emotions, the long-term damage of aggressive behavior can be hard for others to ever overcome. Find a healthy way to deal with your anger.

Negotiate New Healthy Boundaries.This is hands-down the most important lesson we women need to learn. Healthy boundaries are like having a front door with a lock on it. You have the right to keep out unpleasant visitors. If someone is causing you drama, dysfunction, and/or pain, it’s time to learn how to say: “When you _______ (fill in the unhealthy behavior), it makes me feel _________. If you can’t be more respectful to me, I will have to _________ (list the consequences and stick to them).” We teach people how to treat us; it’s okay to say “No, that’s unacceptable.” Read Online!

Crystal Andrus – A leader in the field of self-discovery and

A Ask the Right Questions. Your brain is simply a computer that has downloaded a ton of information over your lifetime. It has no conscience; it simply receives the question you ask it and seeks the simplest answer. Ask it why you’ve been rejected and it will tell you a whole slew of negative things about you. Ask it what you have to learn from this situation … or how this can make you better, and it will give you great answers that will help you rather than hurt you.

personal a

very

transformation. tough

From

beginning—one

that could easily have spun her into darkness—Crystal has risen to become an international coaching sensation, three-time, best-selling author, international speaker, TV personality, host of her own “CBS Crystal Andrus Radio Show”, founder of “The S.W.A.T. Institute (Simply Woman Accredited Trainer)”, founder of the new online magazine, www.simplywoman.com, spokesperson for the health & wellness line of products—“Xooma” (sounds like Zooma), as well as a worldrenowned women’s advocate. Her latest book about “Woman Energy™” is in the works, and will prove to be her greatest accomplishment to date! (Stay tuned!!) www.crystalandrus.com

www.AspireMAG.net | December / January 2014

The Richness of

LIVING a Purposeful BY MARYELLEN DE VINE

hrough the years I’ve found that my life flows more smoothly when I stay connected to Spirit, to my angels and guides, and to my Inner Wise One. Opening myself to the beauty and wisdom in nature and art has created such richness and magic in my life. When I go for walks, I often invite my angels to walk with me. Sometimes particular trees call my attention and I receive a message. I thank the hawk flying above me or the crow following behind me, squawking a greeting. I choose to know that these beings of nature are here for me as messengers or to bless me in some way. I have witnessed and experienced so many amazing things that I truly know have been orchestrated by Spirit. But I also feel I experience these things because I am open

Life

to them, I invite them in, I embrace them and am honored to have them. A few days ago a crow followed me on my walk, hopping from tree to tree. A day or so later, I was sitting in my backyard when I saw another crow fly to the top of a tree near me. He sat facing me, squawking. It wasn’t like the usual “caw, caw, caw” of a crow, it was one squawk, then a pause, then one squawk, and a pause. After this went on for a little bit, I thought I would connect with the crow through my heart to see if it had a message for me. When the next squawk came, I heard, “You’re ready!” That message was quite meaningful to me, as I have been choosing to press forward on my path, take bigger and bolder steps, and explore what

www.AspireMAG.net | December / January 2014

I love receiving messages, guidance and wisdom through connecting with my angels or nature or even my art. Before writing this article for Aspire Magazine, I felt inspired to paint, to let the colors that were just right for the writing of this piece flow onto a canvas. I let my hand make strokes on the canvas, allowing this painting to bring to my consciousness what the article would be about.

look at my painting and see pretty colors and marks on canvas, but I see Spirit once again sharing a message with me, filling me with encouragement and blessing my life. This canvas was being infused with the energy of the message and each time I looked at it, I received another piece of wisdom coming from it.

Painting by Maryellen De Vine

There is such wisdom in our art; even if that art is squiggly, messylooking doodles. I kept the painting next to me as I started writing. It called to me to gaze at it, and as I did, I found meaning in it. I saw my path going upwards, and it all looked so colorful and vibrant. I saw the beginning of the path with the one dot on the bottom representing me starting out, and the three dots at the top representing me allowing the other aspects of myself to come forward (the Inner Priestess, the Inner Dancer, the Inner Artist, the Inner Teacher, etc.) The other dots on the right side of the painting represent the people I am here to touch with my Inner Light; those I am here to serve and to guide. The part that took me by surprise was seeing all those little dots along both sides of my path representing all the angels and guides who are with me every step of the way. Yes, some might

My life is so rich with deep meaning when I follow my true purpose. I have discovered that my purpose is a combination of listening to Spirit, appreciating all the blessings that are on this Earth, shining my own unique Light, and teaching and guiding others in their transformation.

HERE ARE A FEW WAYS THAT YOU CAN GET STARTED OPENING TO THE MAGIC AND RICHNESS OF YOUR OWN SPIRITFILLED, PURPOSEFUL LIFE: I nvite the angels into your life. An easy way is to bring an angel statue or image into your space. You can place it on your nightstand or on your desk. Sit quietly, invoking your angels’ presence, and TRUSTING that because you have asked, they are truly there by your side. You may even feel their love washing over you. ee the world through the eyes of S your Inner Child; the child who saw magic and miracles in everyday occurrences, especially in nature. The

WISDOM & SELF-GROWTH

is around the next bend. I placed my hand to my heart, said “thank you” to the crow, and as soon as I did, he flew away. He had finally gotten my attention and given me my message.

next time you are outdoors, choose to notice the beauty around you. Listen to the birds singing, feel the breeze upon your face, and feel the sun warming you. If something calls your attention (a tree, a flower, or a sound), allow yourself to really take note of it. What do you notice about it? What stands out for you? Is there a message in this for you? If a bird or animal shows up, you can look up the meaning of that totem. sk for a message through “automatic A writing.” Just allow your pen to write the words coming through you. You might begin with asking your angels “What would you like me to know?” and you may very well receive a love letter from them. That often is how they begin their communication with you. You can ask for messages from your Inner Wise One, a tree, a guide; you can even ask the spirit of your business or the book you are writing what it would like you to know. tart playing with art. Color, doodle, or S paint. Let go of needing it to look a certain way or “like a piece of art”. When we let go of that need, we allow Spirit to guide our hands. As I have allowed myself to explore art, I find that the angels can paint through me; that the energy and blessings that are invoked are being infused into the canvas. We can send our intentions and wishes out to the Universe through the portal of our canvas; we can paint out our feelings and emotions, releasing those that no longer serve us through that portal; and we can paint the new and positive feelings and emotions to be held by the canvas. Then we can gaze at our creation and see the wisdom that it has to share with us.

onnect with your Inner Priestess. C This is the part of you who is so wise and powerful, yet so loving and compassionate. This part of you brings more of the Sacred Feminine into your life. She knows what your purpose is: how you are meant to shine your own unique light. You can choose to embrace this part of yourself, even if she seems a bit foreign to you. Give her a sign that you welcome her by connecting with her in meditation or by drawing or painting an expression of her.

I WISH FOR YOU A LIFE THAT IS PURPOSEFUL, SACRED AND Read JOYFUL! Online! Maryellen De Vine - A wife, mother of three, and Coach/Teacher/ Angel Therapy Practitioner® who understands the challenges of being a busy woman and soul-centered entrepreneur. She has created the “Sacred Success in Business” and “Replenish Your Spirit” programs, blending her gifts and tools, such as Angelic EFT and creativity. Learn more at www.AngelicJourneys.com

www.AspireMAG.net | December / January 2014

me be “Each day, let y purpose here reminded of m ain guided and let me rem achieve all from within, to t out to do.” things that I se Unknown

Goddess

CONSCIOUSNESS T BY M. J. ABADIE

here is a well-known mythological symbol of two birds sitting in a treeâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;one is eating; the other is watching the one who eats. The symbol represents your two sides: the doer and the watcher. These might also be thought of as the actor and the recorder. The actor represents your outward existence, your struggles and achievements, your movements toward others, your participation. The recorder represents your inward life, your thoughts, feelings, attitudes, beliefs, hopes, and dreams. This part of yourself is the watcher, the one who reflects on what the actor is doing. It is contemplative. Carl Jung called these inner expressive powers archetypes, but we can think of them as vibrations to which we resonate at different levels.

from it. Child specialists debate just when this happens in terms of age, but I see it as a continuous process. Consciousness is our most precious possession. Without it, we are mere robots, only going through the motions of life, not really living. In the ability to think, reflect, and wonder, we possess treasures greater than any material riches on Earth.

Together, the actor and the recorder create consciousness. Just as thought without action produces no concrete results, action without thought is mere movement. Both are necessary to create a being conscious of itself and its actions. Do you remember your first conscious moment? There is a time when we first open our eyes to the world around us and see ourselves as both participating in that outer world and separate

WISDOM & SELF-GROWTH

Raising Your

“Without consciousness, we do not know who we are and cannot find out. This greatest of gifts should be guarded carefully and used wisely.” — M. J. Abadie We often feel confused about the difference between the words conscience and consciousness. Conscience is supposed to guide us in matters moral and ethical, but without awareness of the exact meaning of our actions, we cannot judge them. This is where consciousness comes in. When we become conscious of any negative effects associated with a behavior or thought pattern, we are in a position to change our behavior for the better. It is our ability to be aware that makes the difference. Consciousness makes awareness possible—it is our guiding inner companion who never goes away. Without consciousness, we do not know who we are and cannot find out. This greatest of gifts should be guarded carefully and used wisely. The human mind can observe itself thinking—subject and object simultaneously. We can “see” ourselves doing what we do. The girl following the Goddess way is actually on a consciousness-raising mission. By seeking Her, you allow consciousness to emerge. It’s as though you were peeling away the layers of an onion—with each layer removed you get closer to the center. As you get closer, you begin to hear the whisperings of the Goddess’s inner guidance. Subconscious information about

the true implication of our actions may reach us first as a vague sensation, either mental or emotional. It can be a tension or a sense that something is about to happen. Consciousness may register no more than an ephemeral state of being, like the feeling that one has forgotten something important but cannot for the life of one remember what it is. When we listen and pay attention to these sensations, to the still small voice, we hear the voice of the Goddess. The directions we need most often come from within, yet they can be mirrored by what is happening without. The question is: How can we sort through our multiplicity of feelings, sensations, intuitions, thoughts, and reactions to get to the core of the matter? The answer is through reflection. Consciousness thrives in the silence of reflection—and the Goddess Girl can use journal writing as valuable way to reflect. © 2013. An excerpt from The Goddess in Every Girl: Develop Your Feminine Power by the M.J. Abadie. Reprinted with permission by Beyond Words Publishing. www.BeyondWord.com

M. J. Abadoe - A professional astrologer and psychotherapist who researched mythical archetypes and images with mythologist Joseph Campbell for more than twenty years. She is the author of the bestselling Love Planets, Teen Astrology, and Everything Tarot Book, which was placed on a Popular Paperbacks for Young Adults list by the Young Adult Library Services Association. To learn more about The Goddess in Every Girl visit www.BeyondWord.com

www.AspireMAG.net | December / January 2014

HEALTH & WELLNESS

“True health is only possible

when we understand the unity of our minds, emotions, spirits an d physical bodies.”

Christiane

Northrup, MD

6 Ways to Nourish & Renew BY RENEE TRUDEAU

Your Spirit

Rea Onl d ine !

Spiritual renewal is essential to our emotional well-being. “Soul food” helps us nurture our essence, feel centered, build inner strength, live in integrity, trust life, and experience a connection to a higher power., feel a sense of purpose, and experience meaning in our lives.

CHECK OUT MORE

There are many different ways we explore and nurture our spiritual lives. For some of us this includes spending time in nature, conscious movement, whether that’s dance, breathwork, qi gong, yoga, or jogging, prayer and meditation, practicing gratitude, music or artistic expression or enjoying the company of babies and small children. Some of the daily practices that provide me spiritual nourishment, include:

AspireMag.net

ing Creat Ritual

Culti vat Stilln ing ess

l Live & Virtua

UPCOMING EVENTS

g Acceptin What Is

ONLINE!

Choo Happ sing iness Serving Living In Others The Present

LIVING the

Goddess Lifestyle

I Did ItMyWay BY LISA MARIE ROSATI

’m sure that you’ve read all sorts of articles about how to step into your purpose and why it’s so important ... and that’s great, needed and very important. But I’ve always been someone who sees things a little differently and I would like to take this opportunity to share with you my maverick thought about “purpose.”

was living my purpose, I would have told you “YES,” because again… I was living my purpose. I had my first child at 22 years old and my next child almost a decade later. Fifteen years ago I was in the throws of motherhood, raising and caring for two young children.

You’re already living your purpose… and your purpose will most likely change and evolve many times over the course of your lifetime! Let me explain. If you had asked me thirty years ago if I were living my purpose, I would have told you “YES” because I was a sixteen year old, doing exactly what most sixteen year-old girls are notorious for doing … shutting my bedroom door for privacy, thinking about boys way too much and answering back my parents. My purpose was to be a teenager and I did exactly that. If you had asked me fifteen years ago if I

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If you had asked me five years ago if I was living my purpose I would have told you “YES,” because it became clear to me that it was time to embark on a journey of self-exploration, liberation and pleasure… my children were older which gave me some space to identify and think introspectively about my desires and personal goals. It afforded me the necessary time to work on letting go of self-sabotaging behaviors and old, worn-out thought patterns, which then helped me to discover and pursue what has become my life’s work and career. My purpose five years ago was to finally get to know ME and I did exactly that.

As recently as a few years ago, you would NOT have found the strong, wise, courageous, authentic and badass leader you see in me now … but you’ll never hear me apologizing or beating myself up for taking my sweet ass time. No Way! Why? Because … I was exactly where I was meant to be at every moment. You don’t know what you don’t know… and a flower doesn’t bloom until it’s ready. From time to time I think back to the toxic dance I had with my parents and how they frowned upon my free spirited and rebellious behavior during my teenage and young adult years. They said things like: “You’re too boy crazy,” “You’re not living up to your potential,” “Why can’t you be more like so and so,” etc., etc., etc. I remember NEVER feeling understood, unconditionally loved or accepted for who I was. I remember acting out … “Oh yeah … if you think I’m a loser now … watch this – yup … now I’m gonna do something that will really blow your socks off!” Oh the drama. Me and self-sabotage … we were besties for a long time!

Family can control your life forever if you don’t understand why you’re tethered and get it in check. Your family and close familial relationships make up “your tribe” and your tribe is directly connected to your Root Chakra. It’s survival… so the roots run deep, and if left unexplored and unexamined, you can inadvertently give away your power to others through conditioned behaviors like seeking approval and hiding your truth (which are both epidemics for women). Think about it this way … for a child “the tribe” is essential to his or her growth and survival. Losing the approval of the tribe meant certain death. This is deep stuff… I’m talking DNA … we are quite literally hard-wired to think this way. Making the tribe happy and learning from them is a child’s purpose, and if “the tribe” has toxic dynamics and/ or dysfunctional members; the child downloads the information and ultimately has no choice but to bend to the will of the tribe – they can’t survive on their own! Now, if that explanation connected some dots for you GREAT but don’t sink into a “why me” mode because

HEALTH & WELLNESS

My third child came into my life in 2002. My purpose was to care for these three precious souls. I busied my daily life with them and my “hobby de jour” which at times included breeding exotic animals, crafting and attending schools in subjects that interested me. My purpose was to be a mommy in the best way I knew how at the time and I did exactly that.

it’s a total waste of your time and energy. People come into your life for a reason and quite honestly EVERYONE has baggage, but I do feel it’s essential to examine your life and your upbringing (as an observer) to discover which dreams, desires or goals you might have chosen to hide away due to fear of losing the approval of your tribe. Some questions to think introspectively about and/or journal:

• Is there something in my life that I want to be, do or have that I know my tribe will disapprove of and or frown upon? • What am I most afraid will happen if I live out loud in an authentic and epic way?

clumsy or ass backwards it might have seemed to onlookers was necessary for me to find ME. Because I made the choice to excavate the gold (the lessons) from my life long struggle with judgment and disapproval… I’m a mother, daughter, sister, wife, friend and mentor who is open-minded, accepting of people and at peace most of the time. This is spiritual alchemy in action. My wish for you is to know that you are exactly where you’re supposed to be. Look for the lessons hidden within your struggle(s), they are the metaphorical crumbs that will lead you to your next step in your spiritual evolution which IS your life’s purpose. Always remember that this is YOUR life – rock it out YOUR way.

• Who or what am I most afraid of losing and why? Read Online!

• What does not living in my truth cost me? • What needs to shift in my thinking, what do I have to release or what inner work do I need to do in order to live my truth and my life purpose. I’ve been on an intense spiritual journey for six years now and one day the realization washed over me that it really doesn’t matter what anyone thinks about me - but ME. I love the person I am and if anyone has an issue with my way of holding space and living life, it’s his or her issue… their weakness… their low vibration … whatever. That includes my husband, parents, family, friends, strangers … everyone. Each struggle I worked through, no matter how

Passionista Lisa Marie Rosati – An Inner Goddess Catalyst for women and the Creatrix of The Goddess Lifestyle Plan. Lisa mentors women on how become a Modern Day Goddess by consciously designing a luscious Goddess life, cultivating radiant health and creating a lucrative business using and directing their feminine fire. www.GoddessLifestylePlan.com

www.AspireMAG.net | December / January 2014

Practice Yoga with

INTENTION A Guide to Choosing the Right Style for the New Year

BY MEAGAN MCCRARY

e’re in the thick of the holiday season, heading into the darkest days of winter with the promise of a new year on the not-so-distant horizon. As we make the transition, we have the opportunity to reflect over the closing year and set intentions for the upcoming one. Whether you want to become lithe and toned, address specific health issues, gain more clarity, develop a sense of peace, discover your life’s purpose or whatever it is — choosing a yoga style that supports your intention for the New Year is essential for staying on course. Here’s a guide to get you started: To become svelte try Ashtanga-vinyasa yoga Ashtanga yoga is a dynamic, physically demanding practice that synchronizes breath and movement to produce a strong internal heat designed to purify the body. With its many vinyasas (vinyasa meaning “breathing-moving system”), this style is particularly great for building upper body and core strength while toning the whole body. Prepare to sweat as you briskly move through a set sequence of postures while remaining focused on your breath.

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To become more centered try Integral yoga

Iyengar yoga is the practice of precision, paying close attention to the anatomical details and alignment of each posture. Rather than moving quickly from one pose to the next, postures are built methodically with steadfast concentration and held for longer periods of time, and props are often used to modify the poses. The method is designed to safely and systematically cultivate strength, flexibility and stability along with mind-body awareness, and is particularly therapeutic for individuals with specific limitations and conditions.

To detox try Bikram yoga Bikram yoga is a set series of 26 postures and two breathing exercises done in 105-degree heat with 40 percent humidity for ninety minutes — you’re going to sweat. The specific sequence of poses systematically works every part of the body from “bones to skin,” bringing fresh, oxygenated blood to every internal organ, vein, gland and fiber, while the heat and serve to speed up the natural detoxifying process.

To ignite your passion and creativity try Kundalini yoga Kundalini yoga is a spiritual practice aimed at expanding consciousness, igniting passion and increasing physical vitality by accessing kundalini-shakti and integrating prana throughout the body. The method is multidimensional, using rhythm, movement, breath and sound to effectively stimulate and shift your energy. Alternating between active exercises (known as kriyas) and miniperiods of relaxation, you’ll be guided to pay close attention to any internal sensations you’re experiencing — releasing stored emotional and psychological blocks and allowing creative energy to flow.

To develop more self-acceptance and compassion try Kripalu yoga Kripalu yoga is a comprehensive and compassionate approach to self-study that uses asana, pranayama, deep relaxation, and meditation as its primary tools for promoting physical health, calming the

HEALTH & WELLNESS

To gain stability and increase mobility try Yengar yoga

Integral yoga is a combination of yoga disciplines designed to systematically address all layers of the body, from the physical down to the more subtle aspects of being, the emotional, energetic, and mental bodies. Classes tend to be gentle, slow, and accessible, placing equal emphasis on pranayama, deep relaxation, and meditation as well as asana practice. Transforming the whole person, Integral yoga aims to help student access the place of peace and happiness that resides within each of us.

mind, opening the heart and developing deeper levels of self-awareness. The method is inquiry-based. Prompted by questions such as What are you feeling right now? What is your body asking for? students are encouraged to move and modify the postures, discovering what works best for them. Above all else, Kripalu emphasizes practicing with compassionate self-awareness and acceptance.

Whatever style of yoga you choose, being clear on your intention for practicing will help you get the most out of your time spent on the mat. And don’t beat yourself up if you fall out of practice from time to time, most of us do. Unlike resolutions, which by definition are rigid, intentions are softer, more fluid. They are riverbanks on your path, helping guide you in the direction you want to go — reminding you of the bigger picture so that you don’t get lost in the day to day.

To explore spirituality try Jivamukti yoga

Jivamukti yoga is a physically dynamic, intellectually stimulating and spiritually inspiring method that incorporates chanting, meditation, deep relaxation and pranayama into a vigorous vinyasas practice with a heavy injection of philosophy, poetry, music and affirmations. The system emphasizes the living spiritual tradition of yoga, bringing ancient teachings alive in a contemporary setting and applying the wisdom to daily life. Aside from asana classes, the Jivamukti Yoga Center in NYC offers courses in Sanskrit and scriptural study, as well as kirtans and nonprofit events.

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Meagan McCrary - A Los Angeles based yoga teacher and the author of Pick Your Yoga Practice. She teaches for Equinox Sports Clubs, works one-on-one with some of the entertainment industries leading professionals, and holds workshops and retreats nationally and internationally. Visit her online at http://www.meaganmccrary.com.

www.AspireMAG.net | December / January 2014

HEALTH & WELLNESS

Is it

Perimenopause? BY MARY PRITCHARD, PH. D., HHC

e all know to look for hot flashes and night sweats as early signs of menopause.

But did you know that the earliest signs of perimenopause are often psychological or spiritual in nature? Women may suffer for years with early signs of hormonal imbalance and not even know it. So what are these signs and what do they mean?

EMOTIONAL SIGNS OF PERIMENOPAUSE:

• Anxiety and/or Depression – Unexplained

moodiness, sudden mood swings, or even severe bouts of anxiety and/or depression can be a sign of progesterone, estrogen, and thyroid hormone imbalance.

• L oss

of Sexual Desire – Although testosterone often gets blamed for this one, it can also be a sign of low progesterone or low estrogen levels.

• Overall

dissatisfaction with life/Feel uninspired and unmotivated – Low self-

esteem and chronic lack of motivation and life dissatisfaction may be signs of low progesterone or low estrogen.

• Feel like a stranger in your own body –

many things can start to go amiss in the body as women approach menopause – everything from aching muscles and joints (signs of low progesterone) to accentuated fatty tissue on the face and upper back (high cortisol) to worsened asthma or arthritis (low progesterone).

Any of these can make you feel like someone hijacked your body overnight.

• Using

• Lack

of self-trust – when you’re experiencing all of these emotional and spiritual signs of perimenopause, it’s no wonder that you might lose your ability to trust yourself, let alone love yourself. But it’s not you, its low estrogen.

food as an emotional crutch –

emotional eating is common among women aged 40 to 60 and may be a sign that your reproductive hormones are out of whack. In particular, belly fat accumulation is common among women who suffer from estrogen dominance (not enough progesterone to balance out your estrogen level).

• Feeling unsettled and unfulfilled – being in a constant state of confusion (low cortisol), losing your sense of well-being (low estrogen) or low self-esteem (low estrogen) can all leave you feeling dissettled and out of sorts, wondering what went wrong.

SPIRITUAL SIGNS OF PERIMENOPAUSE:

• Feel

PHYSICAL SIGNS OF PERIMENOPAUSE:

Stuck –

feel like a gerbil spinning on a wheel going nowhere? The chronic stress caused by low progesterone may be a contributing factor, as may be the apathy and malaise caused by low estrogen. Never fear – you can get unstuck, you just need a little hormonal help!

You already know about the hot flashes (low estrogen) and night sweats (low estrogen and/or progesterone), but what about these:

• Weight Gain / Bloat – Abnormal weight

gain can be caused by imbalances in progesterone, estrogen, cortisol, or thyroid hormone. Experience abdominal bloating every day? Could be low progesterone. General bloating and puffiness (water retention)? Could be high estrogen or high progesterone.

• Feel

disconnected from a Higher Power – if you feel like God gave up on

you somewhere along the way, you’re not alone. Spiritual crises of faith are common in perimenopausal women. Again, you have hormonal imbalance to thank for that (especially estrogen dominance).

• Feel

• Irregular

like you are wasting your life away – I can’t tell you how many

women have a sudden moment of insight somewhere in their 40s or 50s where they wake up one day and wonder what happened to their lives. They’re exhausted (hormonal imbalance) and feel like they have nothing to show for it. It’s okay. It doesn’t have to be this way.

Periods/ Severe cramping –

you can blame estrogen dominance (low progesterone, high estrogen) for those. Chronically heavy flow could be thyroid hormone imbalance while a chronically scanty flow could be low estrogen.

• Chronic Fatigue / Loss of

Energy – any

type of hormonal imbalance (progesterone, estrogen, thyroid, or cortisol) will

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cause unexplained fatigue. If it’s not your diet or lack of physical activity, it may be time to get your hormones tested. feel like you’re losing your mind? Could be estrogen dominance (low progesterone, high estrogen) or thyroid imbalance.

• T hinning Hair / Hair Loss – Feel like all of your hair is floating down the drain every time you take a shower? Could be low estrogen.

Surprised by some of these signs? Thought you were going crazy or they were just a by-product of “getting older”? Pish posh! All of these signs and symptoms are 100% preventable and treatable.

YOU JUST NEED TO:

1) Eat

supplements to enhance normal hormonal production, if need be – if

doing the first four don’t work, it may be time to take a look at supplements to support your hormonal health. Progesterone comes in cream form over-the-counter and bio-identical versions of most hormones are now available if you ask your doctor. Just make sure you get your blood tested before you start supplementing with things you may not need! When you begin to embrace the holistic path to wellness you will learn that your symptoms are your body’s way of letting you know that it is out of balance and is asking for your help. By tuning into the wisdom of your body and its messages you can begin the healing journey of rebalancing your hormones naturally.

whole, unprocessed foods

that support hormonal balance in proper proportion (20-25% fat, 55-65% carbs, and 20% protein)

2) Get enough sleep – our hormones start to suffer when we chronically get less than 7.5 hours per night

3) Make time for movement each day – 30 minutes is all it takes – run, walk, bike, do some yoga or Zumba; it’s all good!

4) De-stress

–

this is perhaps the most important one on the list – you have to make time for you every single day. Do some yoga, meditate, or take a walk in nature – whatever gets you in your ‘zone’ and feeling like all is right (or at least remotely better) in your world.

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Mary E. Pritchard, Ph. D. - A professor in the Department of Psychology at Boise State University as well as a Holistic Health Counselor. Mary’s extensive educational background combined with her personal passion and commitment to empowering women in healing their hormonal health naturally and reclaiming their Feminine Power empowers her client’s to experience profound shifts in their health. Visit www.EmbodyHeartandMind.com to download Mary’s free eworkbook The 9 Signs Your Hormones are Out of Balance (and What to Do About It). You can also visit Mary at www.AwakeningtheGoddessWithin.net.

HEALTH & WELLNESS

• Memory Changes or Fuzzy thinking –

5) Take

THE

Wise Woman Way

LIVING A

Life

Purpose BY SUSUN WEED

ould you rather do a favor for someone or be the object of a pinup photo? Most of us prefer to be useful rather than decorative. Being useful gives us a purpose. While physical beauty is desirable, we all know that it fades. Our ability to be useful increases with age, however. As we get older, the things that do not serve us can fall away, revealing the underlying truth of who we are. Our purpose becomes

clearer. We see that only love endures, and that the purpose of life is to share love and create joy. The purpose of our lives differs from the goals of our lives. We strive to achieve goals; purpose carries us. We must think up goals; purpose is inherent and without thought. Goals are different. We each have different goals, and different ways of achieving the same goals, but we all have the same purpose: To share love and create joy.

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A life of purpose is easy to achieve. All that is required is the removal of the obstacles that prevent love and joy from flowing through us and out to others. I say this tongue in cheek, for nothing is more difficult than removing the obstacles that barricade the heart and distort our love and bliss. Love and ecstasy are our birthright and our purpose. We are filled with them, but the walls around our hearts knock us off course and

make us wonder if there is any love or joy in life, if there is any purpose to life at all.

It hurts to love and feel and be in a body. Our hearts get broken. We are disappointed, we despise ourselves, we doubt. For the sake

WHEN WE FILL OUR OWN HEARTS WITH LOVE, THE LOVE OF OTHERS BECOMES A PRECIOUS GIFT, NOT A POSSESSION. of peace, for the sake of safety, forsaking our very selves, we build a fortress and hide behind our walls. Imagine reaching out to tenderly touch something you love, only to find an invisible wall that either deflects your touch, causing you to hurt yourself, or knocks your hand abruptly forward, harming the object of your affection. There is no purpose to life in isolation. We must make our way down the tower of disdain and be willing to muck about to be useful, to have a purpose. Usefulness nourishes our ability to express love and be joyful. Our lives are not a choice between pleasure and pain; but a choice between feeling and no feeling. We do not have a choice between positivity and negativity; but a choice between intimacy, with all its

A commitment lays a path for us. A commitment requires us to manifest our intentions. It is most beneficial to begin with simple, yet specific, commitments. “I am going to meditate every day,” is an ineffective close, but not quite there. Tie your commitment to time to increase its effectiveness. “I will meditate for three minutes a day for the next month,” is more likely to be achieved. When we succeed at our commitment, we increase our sense of empowerment and self-worth. Cut yourself some slack, and you have the perfect commitment. Life is rarely about doing things every day. “I will meditate for three minutes at least five nights a week for the next month.” Ah! That you can do. Take action in your commitment. Instead of affirming that you are something, make a commitment to be it. “I am a joyous being,” is an excellent affirmation. “I will do at least three things that bring me joy daily for the next six weeks,” is a commitment.

HEALTH & WELLNESS

The psychiatrist Wilhelm Reich, student of Freud, believed that we are all inherently loving. But this pure core of love winds up hurting others because it is distorted by the inevitable inner protective barriers that we create to shield us from the pain of existence.

attendant problems, and disengagement. Feelings, like muscles, come in seemingly opposite pairs that nonetheless work together. Love and hate. Peace and war. Joy and loss. Hopes and fears. Need help in leading a life of purpose? Use commitments to help guide your way. When we are not actively working on a commitment, we frequently lose sight of our purpose. Without a commitment, we focus on the pain, and lose the ability to be in joy. Without a commitment, we forget we are the director of our own play. Without a commitment, we mistakenly believe ourselves to be the victim, and lose the ability to be in love.

When you succeed at one commitment, get started on another one. The children’s gym where my granddaughter goes has a big paper tree with paper leaves in a box nearby. When a child helps another child or is kind, the deed is written on a leaf and added to the tree. Children can see that their loving kindness and willingness to share joy makes a difference to others. Do you commemorate your good deeds, give yourself a pat on the back, and move on? Or do you hold on to them until they turn into grudges? Begin to notice when you are feeling resentment. Resentment is untidy and takes up way too much space in the psyche. Resentment is harsh and hard on the heart. Resentment is heavy, brutal, and mean to the nerves and the glands. Resentment ruins its owner. Resentment sickens its keeper. COMMITMENT: “For the next week, on at least five nights, before going to sleep, I will look over my day and notice any resentment that I allowed in that day.” Repeat, for a month, then for more. COMMITMENT: “For the next week, I will continue looking back on my day on at least five nights, now not merely noticing resentment but stepping aside from it, ceasing to feed it, letting it go.” Repeat, for a month, then for more. COMMITMENT: “For the next month, after looking back on my day and releasing resentment at least five nights a week, I will look back even further and let go of past resentments as well.” Repeat, lengthening the time frame.

COMMITMENT: “During the next month, I will open my heart to one person who has offended/upset/ angered me.” Closing down our hearts hurts us far more than it hurts anyone else. Forgiving someone does not have to lead to a reconnection. Opening the heart is not about reaching out, it is about reaching in, reaching in for yourself, embracing life’s purpose, to love and increase joy – for ourselves, as well as for others. When we clear the grudges and resentments that protect us, the love shines out. When we fill our own hearts with love, the love of others becomes a precious gift, not a possession. When we nourish ourselves with pleasure, we emanate, and thus attract, more happiness. Suddenly the gates of the heart swing open and life bursts forth in dynamic disequilibrium and spontaneous complexity. We laugh at our attempts to control life. We no longer need to be perfect. We are content to be useful. WE ARE LIVING A LIFE OF PURPOSE: FILLED WITH Read Online! LOVE AND JOY. Susun Weed – An internationally renowned herbalist, author, and director of the Wise Woman Center in New York. She is a revered voice of the Wise Woman Tradition, where women’s bodies and women’s emotions are valued. Susun is a founding grandmother of the herbal renaissance and the originator of the concept of complementary medicine. www.SusunWeed.com

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RELATIONSHIPS Three Ways Natura can Teach Our Kids (and Us) BY JILL HOPE

d Rea e! n Onli

“Teach your children that

they need nothing exterior to themselves to be happy, no person, place or thing, and tha t true happiness is found within. ” Neale Donald Walsch

e f i L t u o Ab

Many people tout the benefits to kids of being in nature. Nature can help us learn about the inner workings of life, the stuff we don’t often see on the outside as we go through our daily lives. Nature is energy (well, everything is energy when it comes down to it), and by observing this natural energy of life and taking cues from what we observe, we can learn a lot about how we can function at our best. By opening up to what nature can teach us, we can learn how to help our kids live the best lives they can. Read the entire article to learn 3 things we can learn from nature about guiding our children in living great lives. Read the entire article to learn 3 things we can learn from nature about guiding our children in living great lives.

CHECK OUT MORE ONLINE!

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l Live & Virtua

UPCOMING EVENTS

8 Keys

to Creating a

Loving, Joyful

Relationship BY MARGARET PAUL, PH. D.

o you believe that if you have to work on a relationship, it’s not the right relationship for you? Having worked with couples for 45 years, I can tell you without a doubt that this is NOT true! However, “working on a relationship,” doesn’t mean that it has to be hard. It primarily means that you continually learn and grow toward being an ever-more-loving person. While we don’t need to be in a relationship to continue to evolve toward being more loving, relationships trigger all that is unhealed within us, thereby offering us wonderful opportunities for healing and growth.

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HERE ARE EIGHT KEYS THAT I’VE FOUND TO BE ESSENTIAL IN CREATING A JOYFUL, LOVING RELATIONSHIP:

own Feelings Rather than Blame your Partner

Self-abandonment is the primary cause

RELATIONSHIPS

1.Take Responsibility for your

Love flourishes when partners want to learn about themselves and caringly understand each other.

of relationship failure. You abandon yourself when you avoid responsibility for your feelings by: • Staying focused in your head rather than learning to be present in your body and your feelings • Judging yourself rather than learning to love and value yourself • Turning to addictions to numb your feelings • Making your partner responsible for your feelings When you abandon yourself, you disconnect from yourself, which makes it impossible to connect with your partner. Instead, you are likely to blame your partner for your resulting unhappiness. Learning how to learn from and manage your painful feelings is the most essential key to creating a loving relationship.

Take Your Partner’s 2. Don’t Behavior Personally We all come into relationships with baggage from our growing-up years.

No one emerges unscathed.

from

childhood

Each person comes into the relationship with learned ways of managing their feelings and reacting to conflict. Each person has their own wounds that can be triggered by different situations. It’s vitally important that you learn to not take your partner’s learned and unloving ways of managing his or her feelings and conflicts personally. His or her anger, resentment, withdrawal or resistance is not about you. This doesn’t mean that you won’t feel lonely and heartbroken when your partner disconnects from you. It always hurts our heart when a beloved person disconnects from us, and we each need to learn to be very compassionate and gentle with these painful feelings. But not taking our partner’s behavior personally allows these feelings to move through us fairly quickly. Taking our partner’s behavior personally keeps us stuck in our own triggered responses – our own anger, compliance, withdrawal or resistance.

3.Compassion Rather than

Judgment – Letting Go of Control Judging yourself or others is a form of control that backfires, both on the inner level and also within relationships. Practicing bringing compassion to your own woundedness, and to your mistakes, fears and failures makes it far easier to be compassionate toward your partner’s woundedness and mistakes. We all want acceptance and we feel close to those who accept us. When you learn to love, value and accept yourself, you will find yourself being far more accepting of your partner. If your partner’s behavior is truly intolerable to you, then you need to consider leaving. Our only viable choices are to accept or to leave. Getting your partner to change through controlling behavior is not a viable choice, since it doesn’t work. Your partner will change only when he or she wants to -- not when you try to change him or her through your controlling behavior.

4.The Intent to Learn

At any given moment, we choose our intent: either the intent to avoid our pain -- through some form of controlling behavior -- or the intent to learn about loving ourselves and others. While controlling behaviors create distance and unsafe relationship space, relationships thrive in the safe space created by the intent to learn about both yourself and your partner. Love flourishes when partners want to learn about themselves and caringly understand each other.

5.Lovingly Disengage in

Conflict When One or Both Are Not Open to Learning You cannot resolve conflict until you are both open, so when you and/or your partner are not open to learning, one of you needs to lovingly disengage until both of you are open. Lovingly disengaging means that you walk away from the conflict without anger or blame -- keeping your heart open and doing your own inner work. When you are open again, you can check to see if your partner is also open. If he or she is, you can explore the conflict with an intent to learn. Much learning about yourself and your partner can occur when both of you are open, and this learning deepens your intimacy.

6.Have Each Other’s Backs

In a loving relationship, we watch out for each other. We know each other’s triggers and vulnerabilities and we do what we can to support each other through the difficult times. This is one of the great values of a loving relationship – that we have someone to lean on when life becomes challenging or overwhelming for us. We all need this kind of support.

7.See the Best in Your Partner

We all have a beautiful essence -- our true core self. This is likely what you fell in love with about your partner. Our essence often gets covered up by our wounded controlling behaviors, but as people do their inner-healing work,

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their essence begins to emerge. We can help each other with this healing by telling each other about what is wonderful about the other person. Pointing out what we love about each other is loving and supportive, while pointing out what we don’t like undermines our partner and the relationship.

8.Fun, laughter and play Having fun together, laughing and playing together are a vital parts of a loving relationship. Be sure to make time for this, as it likely won’t happen unless you plan the time for it. It will be helpful if you let go of thinking of this as work, and instead look at it as

a wonderful healing and growth process that can occur between partners. There can be so much joy -- in healing the old blocks to fully loving!

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Dr. Margaret Paul, Ph. D. - A relationship expert, best-selling author and co-creator of the powerful Inner Bonding® self-healing process, and the related SelfQuest® self-healing software program -recommended by actress Lindsay Wagner and singer Alanis Morissette. She has appeared on numerous radio and television shows including Oprah. CLICK HERE for a FREE Inner Bonding Course and visit Margaret’s website at www.InnerBonding.com

The

Secrets of A HEALTHY

Marriage BY SHANN VANDER LEEK

his past October, my husband Thomas and I celebrated 21 years of marriage. Today I’ll share my top 5 secrets to the longevity of our loving partnership. But first, let me tell you how grateful I am that my husband chose me to share in his life journey. I experienced being raised by my mom, (whom didn’t remarry until I was on my way to college). My dad was remarried three times before I became a teenager and has since been married and divorced two more times. When I was young, I thought I would never get married because it didn’t work out for my mom and dad and if I did get married I was sure it wouldn’t last. I had no idea what a loving partnership looked like for the long haul. Before I met Thomas, the longest intimate relationship I’d ever had, (about two years) was with a young man my friends and family prayed that I wouldn’t stay with. He was quite the player and our relationship blew

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In the beginning of our relationship, I could be down right mean when had a fight. I would go for the throat, every time. I was jealous, mouthy and still carrying loads of anger toward my last boyfriend who’d been a player and a cheat which did a number on my self-esteem. I was projecting all of my dark energy at Thomas and seemed hellbent on pushing him away, (he was going to leave anyway, right?) Thankfully, I sought out a counselor and through our work together, gained a better understanding of why I felt the need to fight to win and why I would often try to blow up the relationship. I got to root of some of my deep-seated anxiety and insecurities. Asking for support was a gift which marked the beginning of my healing journey and our robust marriage. Our marriage is not and never has been perfect. We’ve been through a lot together, especially in the early days of our partnership. During the first month of marriage, we quit our jobs and moved to a new city. I’d landed a regional sales job at the CBS Affiliate in Traverse City, MI and we had to find a place to live, rent out our home in Kalamazoo and Thomas needed to find a job. Talk about a stressful start!

During the last 21 years, we’ve uncovered the top five secrets to the longevity of our loving partnership.

RELATIONSHIPS

up when I found out he was cheating on me with a friend and co-worker. About a year later, I met my beloved husband at a preparty before a Western Michigan University football game. He was making ‘proper’ Bloody Mary’s, (Clamato instead of Tomato juice + pickle juice etc.). Thomas was super kind, quite handsome (in a Captain America kind of a way) and still is! I thank the universe every day for our chance meeting that opened the door to our life together.

FIVE SECRETS TO A HEALTHY MARRIAGE INCLUDE:

DEMONSTRATE RESPECT AND LOVING KINDNESS FOR EACH OTHER.

All successful relationships are built on a foundation of respect. Random acts of loving kindness, (love notes, surprises, special dates etc.) go a long way to keep the fire burning.

PRACTICE OPEN AND HONEST, NON-VIOLENT COMMUNICATION Learn to practice “fair fighting” when you’re angry or have a disagreement. Do not open old wounds or throw each other into a shame pit when either of you make a mistake. Keep your private issues between yourselves and work it out.

LAUGH AT YOURSELF AND EACH OTHER A LOT! Humor is one of the healthiest parts of a long-lasting relationships. Learn to lighten up!

WALK THROUGH LIFE SIDEBY-SIDE WITH PLENTY OF TIME TO BE INDEPENDENT. Make time for your independence and quiet introspection. Honor one another by allowing for time apart to pursue our personal interests.

PRACTICE REPLACING YOUR HIGH EXPECTATIONS WITH OPEN INVITATIONS. When you replace your expectations with invitations, you can support yourself and your partner to show up in the best light. Unrealistic expectations kill relationships.

On Marriage, a poem from “The Prophet” by Kahlil Gibran, is the perfect description of how I experience marriage and how you can enjoy a successful relationship with your beloved.

On Marriage

between the shores of your souls. Fill each other’s cup but drink not from one cup. Give one another of your bread but eat not from the same loaf. Sing and dance together and be joyous, but let each one of you be alone, Even as the strings of a lute are alone though they quiver with the same music. Give your hearts, but not into each other’s keeping. For only the hand of life can contain your hearts. And stand together yet not too near together: For the pillars of the temple stand apart, And the oak tree and the cypress grow not in each other’s shadow. I invite you to practice my top five secrets of a healthy marriage if you want to enjoy a long-lasting relationship with your beloved. You and your partner deserve to experience a relationship built on respect and loving kindness. You deserve to enjoy a deep connection that includes lots of laughs, open invitations, non-violent communication and space in your togetherness.

BY KAHLIL GIBRAN

You were born together, and together you shall be forevermore. You shall be together when the white wings of death scatter your days. Ay, you shall be together even in the silent memory of God. But let there be spaces in your togetherness, And let the winds of the heavens dance between you. Love one another, but make not a bond of love: Let it rather be a moving sea

YOU’VE GOT THIS! Read Online!

Shann Vander Leek - Transformation Goddess, Shann Vander Leek is a delightfully curious force of nature. She is the founder of True Balance International and cofounder of Anxiety Slayer. She blogs at Transformation Goddess and mentors women experiencing lifealtering transition with her signature coaching system, podcasts, books and digital programs. Shann teaches compassionate self-care and sacred ritual to women who are ready to reclaim their divine feminine sovereignty. Claim access to Shann’s 5-part audio series to awaken the goddess within at www.transformationgoddess.com .

www.AspireMAG.net | December / January 2014

BY ELIZABETH HARPER

Set an Intention to receive inspiration from your Soul. Close your eyes and take a deep breath into the center of your being. When you are ready, open your eyes, select a color and open your heart to the message from your Soul.

LIVING A LIFE OF PURPOSE BLUE SPIRITUAL LEADER

Your KEYWORD is – Awakening! Wake up to the realization that you make an impact on the lives of others through your wisdom, guidance, and knowledge. Accept this truth and one by one all of your heart’s desires will magically manifest.

GREEN THE HEALER

Your KEYWORD is – Openness! You have always been a healer; your downfall is healing others before yourself. Open your heart to the beauty of your inner light, let self-healing begin, and shower love on your number one client, YOU!

BROWN THE NURTURER

Your KEYWORD is – Nourishment! You know and understand the needs and wants of others, even when they don’t recognize what they want. Your ability to care is one of your greatest gifts. Know that when you create a space with the intention to nourish hearts and minds, “they will come!”

MAGENTA THE ARTIST

Your KEYWORD is – Completion! Your creative ability will seep into every area

of your life over the coming months. It is important to complete projects before moving onto the next. Incomplete tasks will block energy, hinder movement and impact success.

OLIVE THE COUNSELOR

Your KEYWORD is – Compatibility! Not everyone agrees with your methods, it doesn’t mean you’re wrong and it doesn’t mean you’re right either. Your gift is your ability to negotiate and find common ground. Use your skills with those who oppose your approach and make friends of your most staunch adversaries.

ORANGE THE JOY GUIDE

Your KEYWORD is – Play! This is a great time to reunite with long lost friends, catch up with the latest news, and share the highs and lows of your life so far. Allow yourself to accept invitations that promise to take you out of your routine and into a more playful experience.

YELLOW THE ENLIGHTENER

Your KEYWORD is – Wisdom! You are a truth seeker. Never satisfied with here-say, you will go out of your way to delve into the darkness to discover the facts. However, not all truth can be so easily brought to light. Use your intuition to guide you to distinguish between genuine wisdom and deception.

PINK THE LOVER

Your KEYWORD is – Harmony! When soul mates join they each create a harmonic sound. Together they produce music that resonates deep within their souls transporting them to a higher level of awareness. Over the next 12 months you will encounter souls mates and messengers whose mission it is to support your Life Purpose. Enjoy the ride!

RED THE CREATOR

Your KEYWORD is – Action! Financially luck is on your side. Seeds planted over the past four years are coming to fruition. Abundant blessings will arrive from so many different directions it will be challenging for you to keep up, but you will!

WHITE THE VISIONARY

Your KEYWORD is – Future! Focus on the bigger picture and let go of the minor details. If you concentrate too much on the

finer points you will miss the adventure of coming attractions. White creates a myriad of experiences. Decide what you want and let the universe take care of how it will manifest.

TURQUOISE THE TEACHER

Your KEYWORD is – Expansion! Boredom sets in when even your routine becomes routine. It’s time to expand your horizons, step outside the lines of convention, and take a risk. Turquoise is of an innovative vibration; wear this color to move beyond your current reach.

VIOLET THE MYSTIC

Your KEYWORD is – Happiness! You are about to discover who you are, where you belong, and what your “niche” is. This identity package will send out waves of spiritual ecstasy that will touch your soul and manifest the magic you so deserve.

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Elizabeth Harper – An internationally acclaimed teacher, intuitive, healer, and the author of the award winning book Wishing: How to Fulfill Your Hearts Desires. Elizabeth is on the faculty at the highly acclaimed Omega Institute in Rhineback, NY and is invited to speak around the world. www.SealedwithLove.com

www.AspireMAG.net | December / January 2014

CAREER/ BUSINESS

“Life-fulfilling work is never

about the money – when you feel true passion for something, you instinctively find ways to nurture it.”

Eileen Fisher

ad Re ne! li On

Doing Business Like a Goddess:

Give Yourself Permission to Be Successful

There are key concepts that every feminine conscious entrepreneur must know in order to succeed in today’s new business landscape and I’d like to start by sharing the one thing you must do FIRST to create the success that you deeply desire. That one thing is to give yourself permission to be successful.

CHECK OUT MORE ONLINE!

AspireMag.net

When you start applying the 5 step Permission Method you’ll discover your energy shifting from a place of uncertainty, confusion or fear to a place of personal power – the best energy state from which to create and grow your business. on rmissi The Pe od Meth 1: STEP # e that all th e iz n g o c ’t Re t’s” aren “yeah-bu r own. u really yo

The Permis sion Method STEP #2: Surround you rself with support.

l Live & Virtua

UPCOMING EVENTS

on rmissi The Pe od Meth 3: STEP # peccable Create im ries. bounda

The Pe rmiss Metho ion d STEP # 4: Put your self the gam in e.

on rmissi e P e h T d Metho 5: # STEP oney r new m fo w o ll A truths

DOING

BUSINESS LIKE A

Goddess

Gratitude

First BY ELIZABETH PURVIS

reetings, Goddess!

Welcome back to Doing Business Like A Goddess, where I share key concepts that every feminine conscious entrepreneur must know in order to succeed in today’s new business landscape, plus how to create extraordinary income and impact while honoring that you are exactly who the world’s been waiting for. In the last three issues, I shared the first three key concepts for doing business like a Goddess…

1. Giving Yourself Permission 2. Success Leads To More Success 3. You Must Let Go To Grow The 4th key concept for doing business like a Goddess is Gratitude First.

www.AspireMAG.net | December / January 2014

ONE THING IS CERTAIN: GRATITUDE IS NOT FOR A GRATITUDE IS A PRACTICE. Back when I was struggling in my business (and well before I figured out the practical and magical steps to generate more clients and income, I was blessed by the Goddess with the awareness of a powerful magical principle:

In order to change your life, gratitude must come FIRST. It was giving that gratitude FIRST that opened the space for the way to solve the problem of creating a thriving business to finally show up. Without gratitude, I never would have seen my way clear to a solution. And I never would have healed. As a spirit-driven entrepreneur, you’re undoubtedly already familiar with the transformative power of gratitude. One thing is certain: gratitude is NOT for a single day in the year. Gratitude is a practice. Which means it’s not always easy. You won’t always be perfect! (Who wants perfection, anyway?) But…

When you make the commitment to LIVE in gratitude, it will create a space for you to experience the ultimate blessing: to change your life while transforming the lives of others.

1 First thing in the morning.

My very first step with gratitude was to choose gratitude first thing in the morning – to condition myself to be in gratitude the very second I opened my eyes. To this day, “moment of awakening” gratitude is still my favorite practice.

2 Last thing at night.

If your last thought at night is the thing your mind is going to work on all night long, it only makes sense to choose gratitude as your last thought, as often as you can.

3 Keep a journal.

There are so many ways to keep a gratitude journal! One way is to make a list of at least 10 things you’re grateful for, every day. My favorite sentence starter: “I feel rich because _____________” .

4 Bless the jerks.

One of the most powerful business and life lessons I have ever received is this, from my mentor Maria Gamb: people are in pain, and you have a choice as to how you react. The next time someone cuts in front of you, cuts you off on the highway, says something nasty or whatever it is, I invite you to take part in the ultimate gratitude practice: remember that this person is a human being, and as a human being, they are in pain. Bless them.

5 Smile at strangers

What’s free to give, fun to give, and a joy to

CAREER/BUSINESS

SINGLE DAY IN THE YEAR.

HERE ARE 10 WAYS TO PRACTICE GRATITUDE, EVERY DAY:

receive? A smile. Yes, I know that may sound corny. Try it. What’s also fun about smiling at strangers is that it’s a little subversive. Forget about what the other person will think, and give freely.

6 Thank your clients.

Your clients have given you a great gift: they chose YOU to change their lives with. Thank them! Your gratitude will come back to you (in the form of referrals, repeat business and word-of-mouth marketing) as it expands and enriches them.

7 Thank your team.

Without your team, you can’t grow. Thank them! You gratitude will come back to you in the form of amazing contribution on the part of your current team, and perfect team members showing up in your life.

10 Give back.

The power to give is one of the greatest joys of being in business for yourself. Freely give of your time, energy, attention and money, in a way that is in integrity with yourself and supports you… so you can continue to give and receive.

Until next time…

Love and Magic,

Elizabeth PS. Want to know more about Doing Business Like A Goddess? On December 10, Linda Joy will interview me on Your First 3 Clients: How To Get Clients When You’re First Starting Out… And Beyond! Check out the full page ad at the front of this issue for more details on this high-value, complimentary training call.

hank your mentors and 8 Tmastermind.

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What you create with the help of brilliant mentors and mastermind partners simply cannot be created on its own. Thank these people for enriching your life.

9 Call home.

Have you told your family you love them lately? Whether it’s your family by birth or your “heart family,” there is nothing that can shift experience and put you in a state of grace like thanking and honoring those you love. (For those closest to you, one of my favorite ways is to tell them at the end of every day, “You did great work today.”)

Elizabeth Purvis - Shows spirit-led, mission-driven women how to price, package and market their services so they create extraordinary income and impact. Known for blending heart-centered sales, Internet marketing, spiritual principles and Universal Law, Elizabeth delivers simple ways for coaches, consultants, practitioners and healers to double or triple their revenues by creating multiple streams of income and enrolling ideal clients at higher fees. www.MarketingGoddess.com

www.AspireMAG.net | December / January 2014

INTERVIEW WITH MARKETING GODDESS CAREER/BUSINESS

Elizabeth Purvis is a mentor to thousands of conscious women entrepreneurs around the world, teaching them how to price, package and market their services so they create extraordinary income and impact. She is the founder of Goddess Business School®, which delivers a proven path to create a moneymaking transformational business that serves the world. As a mentor and online entrepreneur, Elizabeth created her first 6-figure income in under 6 months as a certified coach, then went on to create over half a million dollars in revenue in just 2 years. Using her systems, Elizabeth’s clients and students have achieved phenomenal results, including quadrupling their incomes in just a few short weeks, multiple 5-figure launches, launching and filling their own high-end programs, and more. She is the recipient of the 2011 Outstanding Achievement in the Business of Coaching Award from the International Association Of Women In Business Coaching (IAWBC). Above all, Elizabeth is a stand for the creative and financial empowerment of women through conscious entrepreneurship. Her work is dedicated to creating a world where awakened women are the new models for wealth, power and success.

lizabeth, with programs such Goddess Business School® and Feminine Magic® you are recognized as a leader in the emerging teaching of feminine energy in business. Was there a pivotal moment when you knew it was time to come ‘out of the closet’ about your connection with the Divine Feminine?

There are two, actually. As a Wiccan initiate, I’d spent nearly 10 years “in the closet” to some of the closest people to me – my blood family. Hiding out for all that time was very painful, and I knew that I would never make it in business if I

Through your business, you can direct your energy OUT (in the form of your gifts) and receive energy back in return in the form of money, relationships, community, etc. was hiding something so pivotal to who I was. So when I chose the name “Marketing Goddess”, it was an open acknowledgment of my spiritual connection to the Feminine. The second pivotal moment was the initial launch of Goddess Business School® in 2010. That was the first time that I really spoke openly and publicly about the Divine Feminine in a business context.

had been marginalized for so long, I was giving other women permission to claim who THEY were. Being in love with your whole self is the first step to personal power, especially financially. I had to put all the fears aside so I could step into my bigger mission.

Your purpose in life is to teach women how to magnetize their desires and create their lives exactly as they wish to live it. You’ve said that entrepreneurship is a magical tool. What do you mean by a “magical tool?” In the practice of magic, tools such as the wand and ritual blade are used to direct energy and focus the Will to a particular result. They are one way to direct your creative energy for the purpose of the working. Similarly, entrepreneurship – i.e., your business – can be directed to serve the purpose of manifesting your dream, inner calling and desire for your life.

I was terrified!

If you have a desire for your life and you want to make it manifest, you need freedom. You need resources. You need a channel for your creativity to be expressed. You also need a way by which the Universe can bring that which you want TO you.

Nowadays, talking about the Feminine in business is pretty common, but it was new even a few short years ago. I was terrified of being judged, cast out of the “coaching tribe,” or worse. That launch was 3 months long, and I was literally sick with fear the

Your business can be all of these things and more. Through your business, you can direct your energy OUT (in the form of your gifts) and receive energy back in return in the form of money, relationships, community, etc.

But I had to do it. I knew that by “coming out of the closet” and being a stand for what

I’ve heard from many women that they KNOW in their heart that they are here to make a difference but struggle with “I’m not good

entire time.

www.AspireMAG.net | December / January 2014

enough” or “Who am I to achieve success?” Have you discovered those same stories coming up for your clients and if so, how do you support them in turning them around?

The thing to remember is that they are just that – stories. The truth is that you are a child of the Divine. And being a child of the Divine, you are inherently MORE than worthy. Abundance and success are your birthright to claim, and nobody can take that away from you. The solution is to own your worth at the core level. To not just talk about it or think about it, but BE it. That’s why at Goddess Business School®, we focus so much on pricing, packaging and selling transformational services. When you create a program or package that can truly change someone’s life, and then you declare that you ARE worth it and the work is worth it, and then you enroll a client who is ready to do that work… YOUR life will change as much as theirs.

Elizabeth, I know that behind all of your mentoring is powerful “inner game” teaching on emotional mindset – or what you call a Goddess State of Mind. What is “A Goddess State Of Mind?” A Goddess State of Mind is the core of your belief that you are WORTH it, you have something to offer and IT is worth it – worth developing in you and worth paying for.

A GODDESS STATE OF MIND EMPOWERS YOU TO…

CAREER/BUSINESS

I’ve worked with hundreds of women at this point. Unfortunately, I don’t know a single one who has NOT struggled with stories of “not enough”-ness, somewhere along the line.

In short, it’s the mindset behind owning your worth!

• Allow yourself to be visible • Offer things that people actually want to PAY for • Package your services to create massive value • Boldly invite the right clients to work with you when it’s a match • Treat yourself like a Goddess and require that others do so, too • Do the real work of self-growth – healing yourself so you can heal others • Deliver from a place of SERVICE, not SERVITUDE • Take aligned action even when you’re scared When you truly embrace this Goddess State Of Mind and take action from that mindset, your energy shifts, your confidence grows, you sign up high-paying clients. You create a new experience of doing what you’re born to do and getting paid richly for it, by the right clients. You change the story of “not enough” – for good.

Elizabeth, if you could offer ONE piece of wisdom to a woman who is wanting to create a thriving business, what would it be? Just one? Aigh! Don’t know if I can do that. ;)

named Maria Gamb. Maria once said to me, “Elizabeth, your success in business

depends entirely on your willingness to take action on what you CANNOT see.”

You may see an empty bank account. You may see clients who can’t pay, or won’t pay. Maybe you don’t see ANY clients. Maybe all you see in front of you is a partner who doesn’t support you or friends who think you’re crazy. None of that is the truth. The truth is that the Divine is FOR you, and wants you to succeed. And that the WAY to manifest your desires is already here. Manifestation requires staying in faith and acting with faith – even when you are uncertain of the outcome or can’t see the evidence firsthand.

Goddess Business School® is relaunching in 2014! Can you share some of the exciting details? So let’s say TWO pieces of wisdom… The first is to remember that your business is about being of service to your clients. Which means that you put THEIR needs FIRST. Which means offering what clients value and will invest in – solving a challenge or delivering what they want.

Yes! Goddess Business School ® ’s Essentials Training delivers a complete system for spirit-rich, mission-driven women entrepreneurs to create a money-making transformational business that serves the world.

Yes, you still get to do what you love. You get to do it in a way that truly serves them, which often means letting go of what you THINK it has to look like, or what you’re attached to.

We’ve revamped the training to be perfect for those who are newer in business and want to go from startup to sustainable – in just a few months. The training will be all-virtual, designed for the busy woman in mind and with a focus on implementation – taking action without overwhelm.

The second piece of wisdom comes from one of my first business mentors, a woman

Best of all, the investment will be very affordable as compared to other mentoring

www.AspireMAG.net | December / January 2014

programs. We would love to support you in Goddess Business School® if it’s right for you – so I invite you to stay connected and stay tuned!

Elizabeth, you are offering a powerful free gift to our readers, the 6 part Own Your Worth Video Series. Can you share the juicy details about your transformational gift? The secret to attracting high-end clients is to OWN your worth – without guilt, hesitation or worrying what other people will think. And in this video series, I’m going to share with you the inner game mindsets and outer game strategies to truly own your worth so you can charge higher fees– and get them. In this series, I show you how to charge 5x to 10x more for what you do – even when what you do is deep, powerful and transformative and how to make your services irresistible to high-end clients who are happy to pay top dollar for your transformation – even if you’re not a business coach. I’m going to show you how to claim your space and authentically position yourself as a coach, practitioner, healer or mentor who is seen as an expert and gets high fees, plus you’ll discover exactly what to put in your programs so that they’re so valuable to high-end clients and they’re well worth those higher fees. Along the way I also give you powerful, game-changing mindset shifts. These are going to give you so much confidence that you’ll never again doubt if your services are really worth it. Read Online!

The truth is that the Divine is FOR you, and wants you to succeed. And that the WAY to manifest your desires is already here. Manifestation requires staying in faith and acting with faith – even when you are uncertain of the outcome or can’t see the evidence firsthand.

Click the Own Your Worth! banner above to claim Elizabeth’s FREE Video Series.

INSPIRED TO

Write?

The Boss From

HELL & OTHER GIFTS

from the

Universe BY LISA TENER

fter hours, a week into my new sales job at a Fortune 100 company, I worked at a co-worker’s computer while mine was being repaired. My boss, who must have assumed I’d gone home, told my co-workers I was in an exclusive executive training program, earning more than they were.

had it in for me, I felt completely at sea. I had no idea what I was supposed to do, took no initiative, and could not even add numbers correctly anymore—no kidding!

As she goaded the two people who were supposed to be my mentors on the new job, I knew I’d made a mistake. Yet, with something like $50,000 in student loans, I wasn’t ready to quit that day. I needed a plan B. And I didn’t have one.

I found what I thought was my dream job— running a nonprofit organization, making a difference in people’s lives every single day. The day after I gave my notice, a board member of the organization called me at work. “If you were my daughter, I’d say, don’t take this job.” I’d already given notice, and, with no plan C, I started the new job two weeks later.

I did find a job—about 48 hours before they would have fired me from the job I held. In this weird situation where my boss clearly

The lack of staff meant variety—from recruiting volunteers, to writing marketing materials, to matching guests (families

www.AspireMAG.net | December / January 2014

coming to Boston for medical treatment) with volunteer hosts, to training volunteers, to grant writing, fundraising and board building—I got to learn and hone many new skills. It proved an amazing job, but with huge highs and lows. Even as the organization grew, we ran on a shoestring budget. In the beginning, I could only pay the interest on my graduate school loans on my marginal salary (no principle). There was the misunderstanding about my anticipated raise, reporting to a well meaning board that translated into having 15 bosses, the inappropriate board member, and working in what several people thought was a “sick building” as several of us came down with similar illnesses at the same time. The job took me a step closer to living a life of passion and purpose, but it wasn’t my “it.” At one point, at a friend’s suggestion, I ended up at the Boston Tea Room, the fifth floor of an old office building on Park Street, where a doorway of hanging beads led to an incense filled room where tarot readers sat at tables and foretold your future. I should have turned tail when I asked the receptionist to recommend the best reader and she said, “I’m available.” After laying several cards upon the table, she told me

I was clinically depressed and should take antidepressants. She made other ridiculous pronouncements that I couldn’t defend against in my hyper-vulnerable state, feeling financially stressed, working more hours than my body and mind could handle, struggling with fatigue and achiness. I left the reading crying—it was the absolute low point in my nonprofit career. I could not see my “way out.” Instead, my path to passion and purpose revealed itself slowly. For the most part, it wasn’t in divine downloads (though I can say I did have one of those—about ten years into the journey that led me to what I do today).

Mostly, clarity came in incremental steps, gentle promptings and small synchronicities: My illness led me to interview a healer for an article I planned to write. I began to see him weekly for polarity therapy sessions that slowly healed my chronic fatigue and led to the stirrings of a spiritual awakening—again, a gradual path. I found such healing that I enrolled in the polarity therapy school founded by my mentor. One night, a realization from the teachings led me to an idea for a book. I wrote, then co-wrote, that book. It took seven years to go from idea to book deal to published—thank God it took that long, because in that time I learned all the things I now teach my clients and students about writing books and publishing.

CAREER/BUSINESS

I could not see my“way out.” Instead, my path to passion and purpose revealed itself slowly.

he divine download came in a yoga T class after the book about transforming anger had been published, once I’d realized that it wasn’t my calling to work with people’s anger. Instead I felt drawn to work with their creativity and teach them the things I learned to write and publish my first book. hat “divine download’ provided a T vision for my business that became more clear and detailed over time. The certainty that this was my life work, though, never left me. I struggled to make a living with this work for two years. I paid attention to synchronicities and inner promptings and trusted in the steps I felt called to make—even when I wasn’t completely sure where I was going. oday, I do exactly what I love—I T write, I edit, I teach about writing and publishing. I get to use my expertise, experience and creativity every day. I work with brilliant people who are changing the world—one book at a time—and my work is quite collaborative. I never could have imagined this type of work in college, business school, or even when I began job-searching. I didn’t even know this kind of work existed. Here’s what I learned on the path: very step gets you clearer about what E you are passionate about—the worse the situation, the better a teacher it is.

The jobs, people and situations that make you feel the most helpless and hopeless often give you the biggest nudges towards your “true path.” Many times, you may not be able to see a step in front of you, but if you listen, the next step becomes clear. Just take that one step. It’s all about faith.

Read Online!

Lisa Tener – An award-winning authority on writing and publishing books, Lisa Tener guides you to joyfully express yourself in writing. She blogs for the Huffington Post, serves on the faculty of Harvard Medical School’s publishing course, and teaches her own Award Winning Book Writing Courses in person and by interactive teleseminar. Download your free Author Tool Kit at www.LisaTener.com