Aspire Magazine - Feb/Mar 2014 - Midlife Transformation and Rebirth by Aspire Magazine

Dare To

Fall in Love (with yourself)

Self-Love is a ChOiCe you make every moment of every day. Will you choose fear, shame, guilt, pressure and criticism towards yourself or will you ChOOSe LOve? - Christine Arylo, founder of Madly in Love with Me tM

CeLeBrAte the internAtiOnAL dAY Of SeLf-LOve Choose One Branch of Self-Love to Grow in 2014, And Make One Self Love Promise that Supports You to Choose Love for Yourself.

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CONTENTS On the Cover

Betsy Chasse Wife, mother, and awardwinning producer of the sleeper hit What the Bleep Do We Know!? Betsy Chasse thought she had it all figured out...until she realized she didn’t. She didn’t know anything about happiness, love, spirituality, or herself... nothing, nada, zilch.

FEBRUARY | MARCH 2014 MIDLIFE TRANSFORMATION AND REBIRTH Wisdom & Self-Growth 18 COLDCOCKED BY A MORNING EPIPHANY by Betsy Chasse Wife, mother, and awardwinning producer of the sleeper hit What the Bleep Do We Know!? Betsy Chasse thought she had it all figured out...until she realized she didn’t. She didn’t know anything about happiness, love, spirituality, or herself... nothing, nada, zilch. In this excerpt from her just released third book, Tipping Sacred Cows: Story of Spilt Milk and Finding Your Own Spiritual Path in a Hectic World, Betsy shares the unexpected awakening that led her to question every belief and aspect of her life with candor and humor.

www.AspireMAG.net | February / March 2014

22 ALIGN WITH THE FOUR ELEMENTS TO ACCESS YOUR FEMININE WISDOM by Laura Clark Joy, Abundance and Love are possible. Your soul whispers to you and beckons you to open up to all the possibilities before you. It calls you to live your best life possible. This requires you to make choices that are aligned with your own inner wisdom. Air, water, earth and fire surround us daily and these elements can be the compass to the calling of our hearts.

CONTENTS 26 LEARNING TO LIVE MY LIFE FROM THE FEMININE ESSENCE WITHIN by Eric Tucci Stroke survivor and author Erica Tucci shares her intimate journey of healing. She shares, “My stroke was a way to open my heart, allowing the Divine presence within to permeate my life and surround others with its warm glow of love and compassion.” 30 LIVING THE BIG STUFF: THE POWER OF SISTERHOOD by Kristine Carlson Women, today, who sit in circle, grow richer in the journey of self-discovery, and it is proven scientifically that our cortisol (the stress hormone) levels are lower when we feel supported in community. In mid-life, especially, we are in a time of change, transition and reinvention. By coming together in a sacred

“True meaning in life comes through understanding your own nature and learning to accept all aspects of yourself.” KRISTINE CARLSON

space, we can rediscover ourselves by co-creating a well lit path that leads us into our next level of greatness to fulfill another purpose-driven life. 34 GODDESS BREAKS: DAILY NOURISHMENT FOR THE SOUL by Mary E. Pritchard, Ph.D., It’s time to take care of you, to rediscover and reignite your passion in life. Do something that makes your soul sing, something that ignites your passion, gives you focus and meaning in life – something just for you. Mary calls those moments “Goddess Breaks” and shares 15 suggestions to get you started on nourishing your body, mind and spirit.

37 TURN YOUR MIDLIFE CRISIS INTO A MIDLIFE TRANSFORMATION by Mal Duane Midlife Crisis? Life Recovery Coach Mal Duane shares some of the midlife symptoms you may be experiencing as well as 10 suggestions to help turn your crisis into a catharsis.

CONTENTS 41 THE PATH OF A FIREWALKER by Kristen Moeller Firewalkers are those who have experienced their own personal fires whether through external events that cause grief or simply the internal angst of what it means to be human. For a Firewalker, the power lies in the willingness to allow fire to penetrate their souls while they seize the opportunity to rise like a Phoenix from the ashes.

“When we cultivate a relationship with our joy, our hearts and spirits expand and we remember who we are.” CAROL WOODLIFF

44 SIMPLY... EMPOWERED! ARE YOU WEARING YOUR WEIGHT AS PROTECTION? by Crystal Andrus Women’s Empowerment Coach Crystal Andrus shares an intimate look into her healing journey with her body and her reconnection with her true self. Her personal revelation led to the realization that, like so many other women, she was psychically using her extra weight as a protection mechanism from years of unresolved wounds, anger, and emotions.

Health & Wellness

48 LIVING THE GODDESS LIFESTYLE: THE BEAUTY & POWER OF YOUR INNER CRONE by Lisa Marie Rosati I feel a shift in energy on the planet happening right now. An ascension of feminine energy … and it’s so exciting. Collectively we are redefining the definition of what it means to be a women in all of her aspects; Maiden, Mother and Crone. I personally will ROCK my Crone like it ain’t nobody’s business!

CONTENTS 52 MADLY CHASING PEACE: TRANSFORMATION IN 9 MINUTES A DAY by Dina Proctor Connecting inwardly multiple times a day has the advantage over one long meditation of shifting your mindset continuously, and repeatedly reminding you of what’s important throughout the day. Discover the transformational secrets of 3×3 Meditation” (3 minutes, 3 times a day) and how it can enhance your inner well-being. 56 THE WISE WOMAN WAY: MIDLIFE METAMORPHOSIS by Susun S. Weed Midlife and menopause are opportunities to change the course of our lives. The metamorphosis of menopause can be used a passage to power. Even after menopause, the changes it has wrought in our bodies act as gateways to reach into our most authentic selves, to touch our deepest feelings, and to reveal our finest aspirations.

“You were put on this earth to achieve your greatest self, to live out your purpose, and to do it fearlessly.” STEVE MARABOLI

Relationships 60 TRANSFORMING YOUR RELATIONSHIP: HOW TO REIGNITE THE PASSION FOR MORE THAN JUST ONE NIGHT by Stacey Martino Aspire Magazine is honored to welcome Love and Passion Coach Stacey Martino to our family, as our Expert Relationship Columnist. Her new column, Transforming Your Relationship, will empower, inspire and support you in creating unshakable love and unleashed passion in your relationship.

64 THE 10 BRANCHES OF SELF-LOVE by Christine Arylo In honor of the international day of self-love, Madly in Love with ME Day, on February 13th, Queen of Self-Love Christine Arylo shares the 10 Branches of Self-Love and extends an invitation to join people from around the world in making a promise of selflove. Aspire Magazine is proud to sponsor this global initiative! 68 CALLING IN YOUR BELOVED: THE TRUTH ABOUT SOUL MATES by Sara Wiseman Is there only one romantic soul mate for us in this lifetime—or several? How can we find this person now? What are the signs that help us to recognize our Beloved?

CONTENTS Career | Business 72 DOING BUSINESS LIKE A GODDESS: MANIFESTING AND RECEIVING WITH GRACE by Elizabeth Purvis To experience success as a feminine conscious entrepreneur it’s important that you stay out of the pattern of over-giving and depletion and allow success to show up in your life. As important as manifesting money is, your level of ability to receive it will highly impact your results as well. Learn 4 of my favorite power tips to open the channels and receive with grace, in your business and life.

“Built into you is an internal guidance system that shows you the way home. All you need to do is heed the voice.” NEALE DONALD WALSCH

76 INSPIRED TO WRITE? HOW TO START A WRITING CIRCLE by Lisa Tener Most writers need to balance private writing time by finding ways to be part of a writing community. It’s hard to write well in utter isolation. You often need input from others to make your work the best it can be. And those are two great reasons for finding or starting a writing circle.

LINDA JOY

Publisher & Editor-In-Chief | Linda@aspiremag.net

Creative & Brand Direction || RACHEL DUNHAM | www.HummingbirdCreativeConcepts.com Editorial Layout || MANDY GATES | www.GruveDesign.com Graphic Designer || MANDY GATES | www.GruveDesign.com COO || KIM TURCOTTE | www.SoulPurposeBusinessSolutions.com MAILING ADDRESS || P.O. BOX 1149 | LAKEVILLE, MA 02347 | 508.265.7929 ADVERTISING || Email Linda@aspiremag.net MISSION TO INSPIRE INFO <CLICK HERE>

FREE

Bring Your Book to Life www.LisaTener.com

with National Book Writing Coach Lisa Tener

EXPERT COLUMNISTS CRYSTAL ANDRUS

KRISTINE CARLSON

Crystal Andrus is a leader in the field of selfdiscovery and personal transformation. From a tough beginning—she has risen to become a best-selling Hay House author, international speaker, women’s health advocate, spokesperson for Haylo Health, and Founder of The SWAT Institute. Crystal’s message is one of resilience, strength and inner power. www.CrystalAndrus.com www.SWATInstitute.com

An unyielding believer of Living the Big StuffTM and not sweating the small stuff in order to experience true happiness in life, as a bestselling author and inspirational speaker Kristine Carlson continues to expand on the phenomenal success of her late husband, Dr. Richard Carlson, beloved author of the Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff series. www.KristineCarlson.com www.DontSweatMoms.com

LISA MARIE ROSATI

ELIZABETH PURVIS

Living the Big Stuff TM

Simply... Empowered!

Living the Goddess LifeStyle

Doing Business Like a Goddess

Passionista Lisa Marie Rosati is an Inner Goddess Catalyst for women and the Creatrix of The Goddess Lifestyle Plan. Lisa mentors women on how become a Modern Day Goddess by consciously designing a luscious Goddess life, cultivating radiant health and creating a lucrative business using and directing their feminine fire. www.GoddessLifestylePlan.com www.sugarfreegoddess.com

Elizabeth Purvis shows spirit-led, missiondriven women how to price, package and market their services so they create extraordinary income and impact. Known for blending heart-centered sales, Internet marketing, spiritual principles and Universal Law, Elizabeth delivers simple ways for her clients to double or triple revenues by creating multiple streams of income and enrolling ideal clients at higher fees. www.MarketingGoddess.com

STACEY MARTINO

LISA TENER

Stacey Martino helps people who feel stuck, frustrated and helpless with the challenges of intimate relationship. Through strategic private coaching, programs and events for her Relationship Transformation System™, individuals learn to use her proven strategies and tools to create an unshakable love and unleashed passion that lasts a lifetime. Stacey firmly believes that it does NOT take two to tango, that one person can significantly shift the dynamics of the relationship. Trained and certified by Tony Robbins and Cloe Madanes, Stacey is a certified marriage educator and divorce preventionist. Click Here for Articles www.LoveandPassionCoach.com

An award-winning authority on writing and publishing books, Lisa Tener guides you to joyfully express yourself in writing. She blogs for the Huffington Post, serves on the faculty of Harvard Medical School’s publishing course, and teaches her own Award Winning Book Writing Courses in person and by interactive teleseminar. www.LisaTener.com

Transforming Your Relationship

Inspired to Write?

SUSUN WEED

The Wise Woman Way

Susun Weed is an internationally renowned herbalist, author, and director of the Wise Woman Center in New York. She is a revered voice of the Wise Woman Tradition, where women’s bodies and women’s emotions are valued. Susun is a founding grandmother of the herbal renaissance and the originator of the concept of complementary medicine. www.SusunWeed.com

www.AspireMAG.net | February / March 2014

FEATURED CONTRIBUTORS

BETSY CHASSE

LAURA CLARK

ERICA TUCCI

MARY E. PRITCHARD, PH. D., HHC

MAL DUANE

KRISTEN MOELLER

DINA PROCTOR

SARA WISEMAN

CHRISTINE ARYLO

YOUR WISDOM! WITH OUR READERS

LETTER EDITOR

FROM THE

”Once a woman becomes aware of forces that influence her, she gains the power that knowledge provides.” JEAN SHINODA BOLEN

Welcome to the February/March 2014 “Midlife Transformation and Rebirth” issue!

Many women in the “second half” of life are hearing a deep inner calling to live a more authentic, inspired and purposeful life. Today’s awakening woman embraces her midlife journey as a ‘sacred path back to her authentic self’ relishing the opportunity to follow the calling of her heart and soul. At 51, I am walking this sacred path and feeling so blessed to be sharing the journey with so many of my soul sisters. Throughout the pages of the Midlife Transformation and Rebirth issue you’ll discover a gold mine of feminine wisdom to support on your journey. In Kristine Carlson’s empowering article The Power of Sisterhood you’ll discover the importance of women coming together in community. Columnist Lisa Marie Rosati’s The Beauty and Power of Your Inner Crone describes how collectively we are redefining the definition of what it means to be a women in all of her aspects; Maiden, Mother and Crone. Light a candle, grab a cup of tea, and enjoy the new issue of Aspire.

Connect with me! om/ http://www.Facebook.c lindajoyinspires

om/

Aspire Magazine welcomes Love and Passion Coach Stacey Martino to our Expert Columnist family. Stacey’s new column Transforming

Your Relationship will serve to empower, inspire and support you in creating unshakable love and unleashed passion in your relationship.

http://www.facebook.c PublisherLindaJoy

ajoy

https://twitter.com/lind http://pinterest.com/ lindajoyinspire/

LINDA JOY Publisher & Editor-In-Chief | Linda@aspiremag.net

Here’s What I’m Reading Right Now...

FROM MY BOOKSHELF

A Year of Miracles: Daily Devotions and Reflections By Marianne Williamson I kicked off my commitment to NOURISH myself in 2014 by starting my day with Marianne Williamson’s daily devotionals. A Year of Miracles offers a daily devotional that helps us develop a positive, loving mindset and encourages us to live our best selves to bring miracles into our lives. It feeds my soul!

WISDOM & SELF-GROWTH

“The more you trust your intuition,

the more empowered you become, the stronger you become, and the happier you become.”

Gisele Bundchen

Trust Your

Read Online!

Intuition

BY SHANN VANDER LEEK

If you want to develop your intuition, you have to learn to trust yourself. Over analyzing every decision in your life can create confusion and mental paralysis. If you don’t trust yourself you may spend endless amounts of time looking for validation and external data to support your decision. What if you began to tune into your body and notice how you feel when something big comes up? When faced with an obstacle, invitation or opportunity, check in with how you feel. Your first instinct will almost always be the true for you. A healthy combination of factual information and heightened intuition = GOLD. Read the full article online. or ego. It can be difficult to discern the difference if we know what signs to look for. Read the full article online.

l Live & Virtua

UPCOMING EVENTS

CHECK OUT MORE ONLINE!

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RECLAIM YOUR LIFE EVENT WITH MAL DUANE || DETAILS! 18 Empowering Stories of Transformation - Free access GLOBAL SELF-LOVE PARTY – FEB. 13 || DETAILS! Join the Madly in Love with Me Movement

COLDCOCKED by a Morning

Epiphany BY BETSY CHASSE

Wife, mother, and award-winning producer of the sleeper hit What the Bleep Do We Know!? Betsy Chasse thought she had it all figured out...until she realized she didn’t. She didn’t know anything about happiness, love, spirituality, or herself...nothing, nada, zilch. In this excerpt from her just released third book, Tipping Sacred Cows: Story of Spilt Milk and Finding Your Own Spiritual Path in a Hectic World, Betsy shares the unexpected awakening that led her to question every belief and aspect of her life with candor and humor.

here was a time when my life was easy, or so I thought. I was happily living in my shoe-consciousness—where I was all about the shoes I was wearing, the car I was driving, and the boyfriend I was dating (and his car and his shoes)—and avoiding like the plague any existential quest that might lead me into the deep, dark bowels of my soul. Such a quest would involve passing through some shit and, well, hanging out in my soul-bowels seemed less than appealing.

And I suppose that’s the story of most twenty-somethings, but as my thirties approached, the clock started ticking, and the search for the meaning to anything and everything kicked into gear. Miraculously, I was handed the golden egg, the holy grail of spiritual understanding on a silver platter, or rather on the silver screen, in the form of What the Bleep Do We Know!?, the movie I co-created with Will Arntz and Mark Vicente. Chockfull of spiritual know-how gathered from magical movie making, I knew it all and owned some great shoes.

www.AspireMAG.net | February / March 2014

Enlightenment? Check! I quickly followed up on my spiritual mastery and manifested the perfect husband, beautiful children, and a gorgeous home. Finally, everything clicked. My inner and outer selves were accessorized, matched, and decked out in deep-ish thoughts and somewhat-understandings. It was a perfect balance of beliefs that allowed me to coast along, riding high on my newfound enlightenment. So there I was. I had my “spirituality” all laid out for me, picked up from the latest and greatest minds I’d conned my way into meeting. My beliefs lazed like cows standing in a pasture of protection, all blinged out, while I worked really hard to keep them all sparkly, running from cow to cow in my awesome new boots. And let me tell you, I frolicked the hell out of that pasture, leaping through the air, twirling, and all the other stuff you do when you frolic. I frolicked right up until I slipped on something smelly and fell, and really, what was I expecting? I was in a freaking cow pasture, for God’s sake. Splat, squish, my boots! I actually heard cartoon sounds when I landed. Okay, I didn’t, but I should have, it was that kind of absurd. I lay there, all sprawled out, seeing my pasture and my cows from a hoof-level

perspective. I saw the ground on which was built my understanding of the world and who I was in my little part of time and space. In that moment, I came to one profound realization: my pasture of perfection was full of shit, and it reeked. It was a wake-you-up kind of smell. My life imploded, and it stank. Cue life-altering epiphany, ready or not (most likely not, because who’s really ready to completely throw out everything you thought you knew and start from scratch?). I’d heard about such things—great epiphanies that illuminate some kind of knowledge and understanding into a higher state of being, an evolution of the spirit and/ or mind. I had heard the stories about how, after fasting or meditating or pilgrimaging or a combo of the three (or helping at a homeless shelter or doing work with the sick or some other selfless activity or maybe even seeing someone else perform an act of kindness or reading about it in the paper), a person felt compelled to evaluate their life. Then, in the story, the person comes to some kind of spiritual jackpot and goes about the business of saving the world, or at least a section of it, while brimming with joy and spreading compassion like creamy peanut butter on a perfect PB&J. My cow pie epiphany was so far removed from the miraculous one of landing smackdab in the middle of a New Age phenomenon

WISDOM & SELF-GROWTH

My awesome epiphany was like this: imagine yourself waking up next to your sleeping husband and feeling this over-whelming urge to scream BURGLAR! Only, I was the burglar in the scenario, and I had stolen someone’s entire life and then, ironically, realized that I had stolen fake goods.

of quantum mysticism, complete with a walk on the red carpet, princess dress, and handsome prince (I mean, how does a girl who has never even spelled the words quantum physics end up making a movie about how it’s the end-all-be-all of the meaning of life?) that the mind boggles. When you soar that high, your epiphany is bound to be messy. Probably because I was no June Cleaver and never mastered the art of the perfect PB&J; mine always have jelly dripping out the bottom, staining my kids’ shirts and making their hands all sticky, with my own shirt being quickly used as a napkin by my little problem solvers, because of course I forgot to give them one of those. In my life, I never seemed to have a napkin when I needed one, even though looking at me, you would probably think to yourself, how does she do it?

I was an excellent faker. I produced illusionary napkins at will, all smoke and mirrors. People will see what they want to see, especially if the magician is really good, and I was. Unfortunately, my superpower of producing an endless supply of immaterial napkins was less than awesome. At this moment, with this epiphany, catastrophic as it was going to be when the full implications spilled out into my life, I needed the real deal because it would take every napkin on the planet to clean up the mess. My awesome epiphany was like this: imagine yourself waking up next to your sleeping husband and feeling this over-whelming urge to scream BURGLAR! Only, I was the burglar in the scenario, and I had stolen someone’s entire life and then, ironically, realized that I had stolen fake goods.

My epiphany came on like hives—a slow burn of discomfort between the carpool and cleaning up cat vomit. It culminated one morning when all of my beliefs, my understanding of my carefully built system of daily agreements about the way life is, tipped and fell domino-like, leaving me with the task of trying to stand them all up again. I did not know how I ended up in that situation that morning, not then. It just happened like life does. Whammo—mornings and existential angst, slipping into my bedroom window, poking at me. I did not receive this wake-up call well; I am not a morning person. I need time before I move, time to lie there and bemoan the fact that I have to do things, like open my eyes and clean the litter box. On that morning, I lay in the wandering-voidof-not-willing-to-be-awake, that gray space between silent room and loud thoughts, and found the first cow to which the title of this book refers, and it was definitely tipped. The cow called I am. I know this because in that in-between moment, I realized I wasn’t who I thought I was. I was a fraud, an alien. Illegal, a stranger in a strange land, with a husband, and kids down the hall. I watched the pieces of my life come together like a mosaic above me, little shards of colored glass, each representing a belief I held sacred, an idea about what was real and what was true about myself and everything I thought made sense, everything I thought about what it meant to live a spiritual life. I watched my understanding of what the word spiritual meant, what anything meant, the minutia of the moments that brought me here, to this suddenly unfamiliar life, and I was filled with an unwelcome sense of hurt and sadness.

www.AspireMAG.net | February / March 2014

We’ve all had those moments in our lives when we feel stripped naked and empty, when a sudden realization about our life has pulverized us. Not knowing what else to do that morning, I first checked in on the usual suspect when we women sink into a pit of utter despair: could it be PMS? Bleeding for several days without dying can cause anyone to want to check out to another dimension. Nope, no such luck. Perhaps a cup of coffee and a smoke would snap me out of my soul-destroying moodiness. There is nothing like a morning visit from Juan Valdez and the Marlboro Man to bring a girl back from the brink.

What the bleep did I know? Up until this moment, I had believed the story I was living; I had based myself, my identity, on being the expert, the mom, the wife, and the cat and dog owner. I had based myself on a story I told myself. I built my life around a belief that I had to be perfect, that no one could ever know the doubt and pain I felt inside me. My career was built upon

being in the know—if anyone saw that I didn’t know, I would be left with nothing, sort of like how I felt at that very moment. I had told myself that I should be happy at all costs, that I was seeking enlightenment, that screaming positive affirmations at the top of my lungs would eventually drown out the negative ones I whispered. I told myself that eventually that thing called the Law of Attraction would kick in, that I could indeed manifest all the gold I could imagine if only I meditated long enough, even if I never actually believed I deserved it. That didn’t matter. Just be it, and it will be—right? I would fake it until I made it. It was all a lie; I was the fool, fooling me. © 2013 Betsy Chasse. This excerpt was adapted from Tipping Sacred Cows by Betsy Chasse and reprinted with permission of Beyond Words/Atria Books, Hillsboro, Oregon Read Online!

Betsy Chasse - Betsy is an internationally known author, filmmaker, and speaker. She is the co-creator of the film What The Bleep Do We Know?! and the author of 3 books, including Tipping Sacred Cows, Metanoia – A Transformative Change of Heart, and the companion book to What the Bleep..., Discovering the Endless Possibilities for Altering Your Everyday Reality. She also blogs for Huffington Post, Intent.com, and other empowering sites. Chasse continues to make provocative films exploring human potential and the nature of reality—or whatever it is we humans are hanging out in. Please visit www.betsychasse.net for more information. Purchase Tipping Sacred Cows on Amazon, BN.com, or www.beyondword.com.

WISDOM & SELF-GROWTH

I felt as if I had been abandoned by my cows, left to survive in this house filled with children, a spouse, a dog, and a couple of cats. All of them felt alien to me. How was it possible, with all I had in my life, that I could feel so profoundly unhappy and unfulfilled? And it went beyond a feeling. I became it in every fiber of myself—my skin and hair, my muscle and bone—they all became this unbearable feeling until it felt as if it was in my cells, changing me, making me heavy in a way I had never thought I could be. And worse, I did not understand it; I did not know how I had gotten to this moment. I had no sense of where it would go. I had no sense of any other way to be. All of this washed over me, the weight of it. How much my heart hurt took my breath away.

ALIGN WITH THE

FOUR Elements TO ACCESS YOUR

Feminine WISDOM J

BY LAURA CLARK

oy, Abundance and Love are possible. Your soul whispers to you and beckons you to open up to all the possibilities before you. It calls you to live your best life possible. This requires you to make choices that are aligned with your own inner wisdom. Everyone needs support in finding this, in listening to this and in making choices that follow this wisdom. And, that support is right by your side every day. Air, water, earth and fire surround us daily and these elements can be the compass to the calling of our hearts.

Choices are often clouded by inaccurate thought. They are made by your emotional self or they are made when you are not centered or strong. These choices are made when you are uninspired. When this happens, choices are not made from your own inner wisdom.

Your inner wisdom exists when there is no chaotic thinking, when emotions are soft and when you are grounded. Your inner soul, your spirit, speaks quietly. Opening up to this inner wisdom allows you to follow the calling that is so quietly beckoning you forward. And this is easier than you might think. Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s easy to make choices based on our own inner wisdom when you embrace the elements. These elements all correlate to a part of our physical being. Each has a specific role. Air correlates with your thinking. Water represents your emotional self. Your physical self can be seen in the earth element and Fire embraces your spirit. Balancing these parts of you with the associated element can help you tame your thoughts, calm your emotions and center

www.AspireMAG.net | February / March 2014

your physical self. Your spirit can rise and your soul’s wisdom can be heard.

The mental component that is you is the part that has the ability to analyze and evaluate. It is that part of you that does the critical thinking. Using the element of air to clear out the cobwebs in your head is just a breath of fresh air away. If you find that your thoughts are beginning to become scattered or that they are beginning to spiral downward, it is the element of air that can quickly come to the rescue. When your mind is thinking too quickly, when thoughts are jumbled and clarity is far way, focusing on the spirit of air will help calm the chaos. By sitting still, taking a few good deep cleansing breaths, your mind will ease. You quickly begin to

USE THE ELEMENT OF WATER IF YOUR EMOTIONS ARE BEGINNING TO CARRY YOU AWAY, FOCUSING ON THE SPIRIT OF WATER CAN HELP NAVIGATE YOU TO BETTER CHOICES. Emotions can always get the better of us. We are emotional beings after all. However, you are not your emotions. They are a part of you but do not define who you are or the path you should follow. Choices should not be made when emotions have the best of us. The element of water is soothing, cleansing and healing. It allows you to calm your emotions quickly and easily. Have you ever washed your face with cool water after a good cry? It calms you down and allows you to take a deep breath

and get back to a center of being. Using water in this way supports your ability to make confident choices after it has soothed your emotions.

THE ELEMENT OF EARTH IS ABOUT WISDOM, INTEGRATION, CONNECTEDNESS AND BALANCE. The earth and everything on it lives in balance and connection. Without it, it falters. Have you lost a sense of connectedness? Do you feel integrated with all that is around you? It is by using the spirit of earth that you can transform into what your soul’s desire is. If you live in a city, often times you do not have the opportunity to go barefoot to feel the earth and it’s wisdom underneath you. It is here that we can connect with the spirit of earth, its strength, its beauty. And, it is easy enough to use. If you are feeling off balance, if you are in need of re-connecting with your own strength and your

WISDOM & SELF-GROWTH

CONNECTING TO AIR IS CONNECTING TO THE SPIRIT OF MENTAL CLARITY, FREEDOM, PERCEPTION AND COMMUNICATION.

calm all the chaotic thought patterns. You are activating the spirit of air that dwells within you and around you. It helps you clear the mental process so that your choices come from within.

own beauty, using the element of earth can bring that sense of integration back to you. Hugging a tree can honestly do wonders for you. By imagining yourself anchoring into mother earth’s strength through the use of a tree, you can discover the strength that is within you. By imagining the beauty in the tree reflected in your own being, you can discover the beauty that resides deep within. It is in this place of connectedness that choices become clear and decisions become easy. For it is in this place of strength and support, you have the ability to listen to your own inner wisdom.

FIRE SYMBOLIZES THE SPIRITUAL ASPECT OF SELF. Fire is pure energy and carries with it a spark and zest for life. It is a strong element as it can maintain life or it can destroy it. It is your life force. When your spirits are low or depleted, it is hard to uncover what your truest desires are. How can you live a more authentic and inspired life when this energy is low? Allowing the spirit of fire to come into your life at these times allows you to become more connected with your calling and hearing the wisdom of your soul. The ultimate symbol of the element of fire is, of course, the sun. It ignites your spirit and energy in a way nothing else can. So, you can easily use fire to uplift your life force by simply lighting a candle. Focusing on the energy of its flame. Imagine its energy being instilled into all the cells of your being. It will lift your spirits. One’s spirit must be ignited

when making choices. It will shine its energy on your inner wisdom so that it will speak to you with great energy. It is here that clear choices in alignment with your purpose can be made. The four elements are tools that you can use to make choices that bring you further along the path of an inspired and purposeful life. Each element, air, water, earth and fire, has a specific and unique correlation with various aspects of self. Each can offer the assistance you need in quickly quieting down energies that do not serve you so that you can hear your inner wisdom. In order to live a more inspired life, one full of joy and abundance, it is imperative that the choices you make are based on your own inner wisdom. When you need support in making those choices grab a breath of fresh air, wash your face, hug a tree or light a candle. Your inner wisdom will come alive and speak volumes to you. Your next best step becomes clear and you will become more inspired, more purposeful and be able to follow your heart’s desires!

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Laura Clark - Laura is known as the Soul Wise Living Mentor. She uses a unique blend of spiritual awakening tools to quickly create breakthroughs for her clients so they are able to flourish no matter the challenges they face. By doing so, they find greater purpose, abundance & Joy in their lives. Visit www.SoulWiseLiving.com and claim your complimentary audio, The Four Simple & Powerful Directions to Fully Living in Joy!

www.AspireMAG.net | February / March 2014

Do You Want the Most Effective & Secret Tools for More Fulfillment in Life? Go to: yourpowerbreakthrough.com Download your Free Audio instantly: “My Powerful Guided Meditation: to Soothe, Calm and Center Yourself for Your Goals Ahead.”

Live My Life Feminine

LEARNING TO

FROM THE

Essence WITHIN BY ERICA TUCCI

“The more we focus on our limiting beliefs, the more powerful they become… you can reprogram your limiting beliefs to something more positive…”

was on my way to rehab on a wonderfully brisk day (Houston was finally being wrapped in the arms of fall even though it was already almost Thanksgiving) and I made a discovery that was born out of a feeling I had a few days before. I had been faced with the fear that I wouldn’t fully recover, which sent me into a tailspin of despondency. Would I be able to walk normally again? Would I be able to return to my salsa dance lessons? Would my arm ever have all of its strength back or would it always feel like a dissociated appendage? Would I ever have the energy to get back to my business: my Reiki and massage, my books, my life coaching? Could I still be a good mom to my boys? Would I be able to reconnect again with the love of my life?

www.AspireMAG.net | February / March 2014

But then I had my revelation, and it was this… my full recovery because of my “limiting beliefs.”

For a few days, that fear kept rolling around in my head like a bowling ball, with me as its target. I was a lone bowling pin, unstable and wavering, waiting to be knocked down into the chute, only to be lifted up again to be knocked down again…and again…and again. Would I ever be able to escape that loop of constant “mind chatter” that fed my fear? Never mind that I had just written the chapter “Never Give Up!” or that I always tried to remind myself to “surrender and let go,” to release my fears to the universe. Never mind that I had received countless inner messages that I would fully recover. But my body didn’t seem to be progressing; in fact, I felt like I was regressing at times. But then I had my revelation, and it was this… I was actually preventing my full recovery because of my “limiting beliefs.” Can you believe that? Me, who couldn’t wait to recover so I could get on with my life. Me, who had so much to do, so many plans that didn’t include being sick for the rest of my life or even another few months. So where were these fears coming from? What did this resistance to my healing represent? While I pondered these questions, my first thought was that by recovering, I would have to be independent and responsible again, and although I desperately wanted that, it was a

I was on a 3x3 platform high, high above a body of water… a large lake… the ocean… I wasn’t sure. All I knew was that I was petrified of falling. I was so high in the sky. THE SKY! In mythological or religious contexts, the sky is associated with the masculine principle – as the heavenly Father, or Zeus/Jupiter as the God over the heavens or Apollo as the Sun God. Native Americans hold reverent Father Sky in creation myths. In Ancient Egypt, Horus is the ruler of the sky. In China, Tian (meaning sky or heavens) is one of the oldest Chinese terms for the cosmos and a key concept in Chinese mythology and religion, relating to the masculine element. Another view of Father Sky is that the principle is associated with the right side of the body, which is the analytical masculine side. And of course, it goes without saying, then, that Mother Earth would be associated with the left side, the feminine side. Sound familiar? As Carl G. Jung said, “Heaven is masculine, but earth is feminine. Therefore, God has his throne in heaven while Wisdom has hers on the earth.”

WISDOM & SELF-GROWTH

I was actually preventing

scary prospect since for the past 1 ½ years, I’d been relying on my mom for support. But then an image came to mind about a dream that I had several times in past years and I feel that it had everything to do with my fear.

Mother Earth represents one’s nurturing the surface – wouldn’t that leap have been side that houses the creative force. Ideas the plunge to a death of sorts? To be thrust that manifest into material form in outer out of my comfort zone where I could direct reality are all seeds within the inner realm all aspects of my life into a place where I of spiritual and mental creation, that is, the was no longer in the driver’s seat? feminine unconscious part of your psyche, I began to see how this where intuition sparks. dream, though from My stroke was a way Within this domain of the the past, had such “great mysteries of life,” a significance in my to open my heart, all things exist. It can current circumstances. be likened to the ocean, I began to make the allowing the Divine the Great Ocean of our association of taking subconscious. Looking the plunge into the presence within to at the ocean, we only see depths as a means for the surface. But below me to find that balance permeate my life and are the great mysteries between the masculine surround others with and unknowns. The and feminine, to deep recesses of the “becoming whole within its warm glow of love ocean represent the myself” as I said in the deep recesses of our chapter “My Story.” By and compassion. subconscious that exist becoming whole and in their unmanifested thus speaking from forms waiting to be my authentic voice, discovered so that they can become reality I COULD direct my life but from a very – our Truths. different standpoint. Instead of living my life from “with-OUT,” as I always had, from the So why was I so fearful of falling into the outer reality of the tangible physical world, waters of the unconscious, to activate my where the masculine rules, I could live my feminine side? After all, I am female! But as life from “within,” from my feminine essence you know from my story, I’d been basking where creativity and intuition radiate in the sun’s rays of the masculine for a long outward, and from where self love is born. time and I guess I became very comfortable And from this place of pure love, I could in that high position where I could exert reach out to others with that same love. My power, authority and dominion over my life. stroke was a way to open my heart, allowing I was ambitious, analytical and aggressive, the Divine presence within to permeate my and I had a strong will. I was somewhat life and surround others with its warm glow emotionally distant, somewhat aloof, having of love and compassion. trouble getting too close to people intimately because my heart was closed. To fall into So into the depths of the Great Ocean I have the water, where emotions and intuition fallen. I’m not going to let my limiting beliefs reign, and where I had no control due to the overcome me. I have a purpose in life, as we “unknowingness” of what could bubble up to all do. As I recover, I wish to help others in

www.AspireMAG.net | February / March 2014

@ 2013 Erica Tucci Excerpt from Radiant Survivor: How to Shine and Thrive through Recovery from Stroke, Cancer, Abuse, Addiction and Other Life-Altering Experiences.

Dr. Carl G. Jung, Collected Works of C. G. Jung (Princeton University Press, 1958). Vol. 11, pp. 447-448 Read Online!

Erica Tucci - Erica had a full life as a corporate manager of a Fortune 500 company, a healing arts business owner and an author. It all came to a screeching halt in June 2011 when she had a stroke. During her recovery, she gained much wisdom about what’s really important in life and she re-entered the world with a new mission in life. She now wishes to use her story as an inspiration for others facing life challenges, which we all have, big or small, as well as continuing the work she was doing before her stroke, helping women find their “yin radiance” through their authentic voice and their own healing. She considers herself the Radiance Muse, inspiring you to live your life brilliantly. For more information, visit www.ericatucci.com and www.radiantsurvivor.com.

“Health isn ’t about be “perfect” w ing ith food or exercise or herbs. Hea lth is abou t balancing those thing s with your desires. It’s about nou rishing you r spirit as well as you r body.” Golda P oretsk

WISDOM & SELF-GROWTH

their recovery from their calamities, showing them the treasures they are receiving from their experience, and how destructive their limiting beliefs can be in realizing these gifts. They can prevent you from reaching your highest potential, from realizing what your mission is on Earth. Your life loses its richness because you aren’t able to perceive it correctly. You begin to see life through the filters of these beliefs, which are a result of words, thoughts and experiences that you internalize as your Truths… telling you that you aren’t good enough or worthy, or that you don’t deserve anything, or that you aren’t lovable or incapable of loving. According to Don Miguel Ruiz, the Toltec Shaman and author of The Four Agreements, “You see everything is about belief. What we believe rules our existence, rules our life.” These false truths that we internalize can ravage our life until we extinguish their hold on us and replace them with ones that empower us instead.

LIVING the

Big Stuff !

The

POWER of Sisterhood I

BY KRISTINE CARLSON

t’s taken a long time and it can be a journey for many of us to find those special women in our lives we can trust, but when we do, they are the gems we surely can’t live without. I know that I wouldn’t be the woman I am today without my girlfriends, and I wouldn’t see life as such a treasure without the women in my life who have been like angels who have shown me so much love and cared for me like a sister. I’ve always told my daughters that men may come and go in their lives, but your girlfriends will remain with you in crises until you can stand on your own to rebuild your life, and this happens many times. That’s where we are now and we have the opportunity to be in community and share the power of the feminine circle; wise women have always sat together in community to support each other in council of large life matters that affect their families and tribe. Women, today, who sit in circle, grow richer

in the journey of self-discovery, and it is proven scientifically that our cortisol (the stress hormone) levels are lower when we feel supported in community. In mid-life, especially, we are in a time of change, transition and reinvention. By coming together in a sacred space, we can rediscover ourselves by co-creating a welllit path that leads us into our next level of greatness to fulfill another purpose-driven life. I believe as evidenced in my own life, that we are like cats: we have many lives to live in this one precious life. Sometimes, these changes are most untidy, and it’s far easier to receive the gift of change with support and encouragement. Our world needs us to find each other and as we grow richer in wisdom, we band together in a circle that can’t be broken. Together, we can remember why we came to this earth. Together, we can claim our joy in this new adventure of life unfolding. Together, we can come to understand and

www.AspireMAG.net | February / March 2014

You can tiptoe around in the dark grappling for something to hold onto and ground you in this time of change, or you can sit comfortably in a virtual circle, wrapped in a blanket. As I step into this phase of life where there is so much more, I invite to join me, and hundreds of like-minded women for The Don’t Sweat the Change Sisterhood. As a member of this sacred virtual community for midlife women we’ll meet once a month via phone and come together to explore, learn and support each other as we navigate this new chapter of our lives. I’ll be right there on the journey with you… opening my heart and soul to you as I share what I’m learning, the growth edges I’m surfing in my mind, body and spirit awareness, and lovingly support you in doing the same.

Together we will traverse empowering new topics and delve deeper into answering some of midlife’s big questions: Where is your passion? What really lights your fire now? How do I define myself with an empty nest and how do I fill the emptiness renewed with a new purpose? What’s happening to my body?

How can we go through our body changes gracefully and with optimal health? How can I tap into my divine feminine sexual essence? How can I have romance and sovereignty all at once? How can I rediscover love with my husband or my partner? How can I really learn not to sweat the small stuff so I can live the big stuff? Thank you for considering joining the Don’t Sweat the Change Sisterhood where we will explore and journey this path of life, love and letting go—together. Grab your cup of tea, put on your slippers, and get cozy as we share the power of women, circle and sisterhood on the path to awareness and joy in one spiritual hour a month. Treasure the gifts of life and love,

Kris

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Kristine Carlson – An unyielding believer of Living the Big StuffTM and not sweating the small stuff in order to experience true happiness in life, as a bestselling author and inspirational speaker Kristine Carlson continues to expand on the phenomenal success of her late husband, Dr. Richard Carlson, beloved author of the Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff series. Kristine invites you, the midlife woman, to join her sacred community with women around the world in the Don’t Sweat the Change Sisterhood. Learn more at www.KristineCarlson.com

WISDOM & SELF-GROWTH

express the deepest love affair that we have – the one we experience with life and the most profound relationship we have within. In sisterhood, we can hold space in love and support as we heal and embrace the unknown with courage and with heart calling on grace. We can do this in celebration and dance as if we are maidens making our way around a maypole!

www.AspireMAG.net | February / March 2014

COMPLIMENTARY PERPETUAL AUDIO SERIES “I HAVE ALWAYS BEEN DRAWN TO THE Personal, Intimate Stories OF WOMEN WHO HAVE NOT ONLY Lived Through UNIQUE AND SOMETIMES Painful Life Experiences, BUT WHO CAME OUT THE OTHER SIDE ARMED WITH THE Wisdom, Love, Insights And Heart Of A Warrior Woman. MAY THEIR STORIES Inspire You To Believe THAT YOU TOO ARE AN Extraordinary Woman” -Host Linda Joy

INSTANT ACCESS brings you the intimate one-on-one conversations with women who share their personal transformation with the intent to inspire YOU to believe that anything is possible.

Lisa Marie Rosati

Stacey Martino

Mary E. Pritchard, PH.D

Mal Duane

Maryellen De Vine

Kim Turcotte

Stacy Corrigan

Lisa Michaels

Shann Vander Leek

Nancy Kerner

Amy Beth O’Brien

Sue Landis

Michelle Phillips

Lisa Tener

Rev. Elvia Nina Roe

Terri Amos-Britt

Saskia Roell

Janet Nestor

Sylvie Olivier

Kristine Carlson

Inspiring Conversations – Complimentary Gifts New audio conversations and transformational gifts added monthly

www.AuthenticConversationswithLinda .com33

GODDESS BREAKS:

DailyNourishment

for the

SOUL

BY MARY E. PRITCHARD, PH. D., HHC

hen I ask women what they are passionate about, most are stumped. Who has time to be passionate about anything? By the time you make breakfast and the children’s lunches, get everyone off to school, get yourself to work, where you handle everyone else’s problems all day long, including having to leave work early to pick up little Johnny from school because he has an ear infection and deal with your boss’ minor meltdown over the latest figures that just came in from corporate – and it’s only noon – you’re exhausted. By the time you fall into bed around 2:00 am, the last thing on your mind is, “How can I re-ignite my passion so I can live a life of purpose?” But maybe it should be. I know, I know. You don’t have time to re-discover your passion, let alone re-ignite it, but you’re doing a disservice to everyone by not doing so. Don’t believe me? Let me give you an example. My favorite part of Season 3 of Inspired Living Secrets was the call with Linda Joy and Lisa Marie Rosati – a fellow goddess and columnist for Aspire. Lisa Marie shared an awakening she experienced on an airplane. She was listening to the flight attendant talk about

www.AspireMAG.net | February / March 2014

Bingo. And that’s when I realized I had been so busy giving my oxygen/power away to other people; I was spending so much time serving others, I had no more oxygen left. And that’s true for most of the women I know. We’re so low on oxygen, we can barely breathe – let alone discover our passion and live our purpose in life. This has to stop. As the caregivers of society, we need oxygen, energy, power; yet most of us have been giving it all away. And ultimately, that isn’t serving anyone. It’s time to change our focus. It’s time to take care of ourselves. It’s time to rediscover our passion – what makes our soul sing. Is that selfish? No. It’s survival. It’s putting your oxygen mask on first so you can be of service to others. I challenge you to do this: spend some time each day putting on your oxygen mask. That is, do something that makes your soul sing, something that ignites your passion, gives you focus and meaning in life – something just for you. Don’t take the kids with you. Don’t invite your significant other. This is YOU time. If that seems daunting, start with 5 minutes a day. Then 10, then 20, then 30. Just what are you supposed to do with this

new YOU time? If you’re not used to taking what I like to call “Goddess Breaks” for yourself during the day, figuring out what you want to do with your newfound “Me” time can be confounding, if not frustrating. I have a few ideas for you. One of my friends, Brenda, likes to stay grounded by painting a little bit every day. Painting may not be your thing, but most women feel passionate when they allow themselves time to play, explore, and be creative.

TRY ONE OF THESE ON FOR SIZE: • Take a dance class – ballroom, hip hop, belly dancing, ballet, pole dancing – whatever type of movement makes you feel like the luscious, sensual goddess you are!

• Pick up a paint brush or crayon or piece of chalk and start drawing – Melody got so into it she ended up painting a mural on her bedroom wall!

• Go for a nature walk – if your creativity scares you, start small – just get out there and move. But don’t be Type A about it, and no iPods! Notice things… the birds chirping, the way the grass feels under your bare feet, the sound of water running in the stream next to you.

• Take a drama class or act in a community play.

• Take voice lessons or join a choir – it doesn’t matter if you have talent or not, the point is to do something you

WISDOM & SELF-GROWTH

how you should put your own oxygen mask on before putting those on your children and she thought to herself, “That is absolutely not what I would do. I would put it on my children first.” And then it occurred to her: that was her problem. “If we don’t have any oxygen, how are we going to save our children? And that’s why you put it on yourself first, so you can be of service to others.”

enjoy that gets you a little out of your comfort zone.

• Grab your child’s coloring book and some crayons and go to town – color Elmo purple while you’re at it. Remember: there’s nothing right or wrong when you’re letting your creative, passionate self out to play.

• Take a jewelry making class and design a beautiful goddess pendant, something that will remind you of the passionate goddess you are every time you wear it.

• Take a pottery class – make and/or decorate your own flower vase. Then go buy or pick some flowers to put in it!

• Color your hair a fun color – even if it’s only one strand in the back that only you will know about.

• Get a tattoo that symbolizes your newfound freedom – every time you look at it, it will serve as a reminder that you are a goddess. Ladies, you’ve gone without your oxygen mask for too long. It’s time to put it back on. It’s time to take care of you, to re-discover and re-ignite your passion in life. It’s time to focus on serving yourself so you have enough left to serve others. Remember: You are a Goddess. You were brought here for one purpose and one purpose only: to share your gifts and your inner light with the world. Isn’t it about time you started re-igniting your passion so you can do just that?

• Grab a marker and draw your feelings – see what shape and color your feelings look like right now.

• Pick wildflowers

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• Learn to sew, knit, or crochet and make yourself a beautiful, flowy dress or skirt.

• Write a poem – it doesn’t even have to rhyme. Just put the words down on paper.

• Start that novel you’ve been meaning to write for the past 15 years.

Mary E. Pritchard, Ph.D. – A professor in the Department of Psychology at Boise State University as well as a Holistic Health Counselor. Mary’s extensive educational background combined with her personal passion and commitment to empowering women in healing their hormonal health naturally and reclaiming their Feminine Power empowers her client’s to experience profound shifts in their health. Visit Mary at www.AwakeningtheGoddessWithin.net to download her free ebook The 10 Signs Your Inner Goddess is Calling You (and How to Answer the Sacred Call). For support on healing your hormones naturally visit www.EmbodyHeartandMind.com to download Mary’s free eworkbook The 9 Signs Your Hormones are Out of Balance (and What to Do About It).

www.AspireMAG.net | February / March 2014

WISDOM & SELF-GROWTH

Turn a MIDLIFE Crisis Into a MIDLIFE

Transformation BY MAL DUANE

arlier this year, First Lady Michelle Obama, 49, got a lot of press when she got a new hairstyle and debuted bangs. “This is my midlife crisis, the bangs. I couldn’t get a sports car. They won’t let me bungee jump. So instead, I cut my bangs,” she was quoted as saying.

SOME OTHER SIGNS OF A MIDLIFE CRISIS CAN INCLUDE: • Feeling like disguising your age • Feeling a sense of failure, either professionally or personally • Having professional success but feeling discomfort with the status quo; {is this all there is?} Cue the buying of a car, purse, or expensive retreat, etc. • Looking up old friends/boyfriends on Facebook • Socializing with younger people & trying to keep up with their music, trends, etc.

• Wanting to try new things you never got a chance to while establishing your career or raising a family, i.e. painting, traveling etc. • Noticing gray hairs or worrying over nagging injuries that you never had before • Feeling uninspired, like the best days have passed you by and you are just passing time. A midlife crisis is defined as a period of emotional upheaval brought on between the ages of 40-60 when a person faces mortality, dashed hopes, fears of aging and a desire for change. It can last between 2-5 years in women. My own midlife crisis started around 40 but in many ways, it was the beginning of a transformation that I am still going through today. For me, at age 40 I chose to get sober and end a painful relationship with a younger man.

HERE ARE 10 SUGGESTIONS TO HELP MAKE YOUR CRISIS A CATHARSIS AND ENCOURAGE YOU TO TAKE SOME SMALL STEPS TOWARD YOUR NEW EVOLUTION. 1. If needed, seek therapy.

I should point out that for some, midlife crisis is not something to be taken lightly or that can be fixed with a new haircut. Sometimes, anxiety and depression can develop as a result of some of these symptoms being overwhelming. If you find yourself drinking too much, staying in bed wanting to pull the covers over your head and just wanting to numb out from the pain, it is important to get help for yourself.

2. Focus on health.

When I was younger I didn’t give a care in the world as to what I was putting into my body or even some punishing diet & exercise routines. In midlife, we are given the gift of greater self-acceptance. We can focus on eating nourishing foods and finding gentle and/or fun exercise or even just getting fresh air and enjoying nature.

3. Change your self-talk.

When a midlife crisis hits, we can start to say a lot of harsh, critical things to ourselves. You may be saying things to yourself like: - Well, it’s all downhill from here. - You’ll never be successful.

www.AspireMAG.net | February / March 2014

4. Practice self-compassion.

We’ve all made mistakes and have situations in life that we wished we handled differently. It’s hard to look back and see with the wisdom we have now some of the foolish or not-so-wellthought-out decisions we made. But try to have some compassion for yourself. You did the best you could with the information you had. Be grateful that you accumulated wisdom from your experiences, no matter how painful, and give yourself a break. You have survived a lot of tough things.

5. Try something new.

George Bush has taken up painting since he retired from office. I decided to use my experience to become a coach and help other women transform their lives. Start small. You don’t have to jump into something. Go to Amazon and buy one book on learning something new. Take an online tutorial from skillshare or find a Meetup. You might encounter a lot of resistance from your ego telling you that this is stupid, it’s too late, you won’t be good at that. Do it afraid. Take a chance.

6. Give social media a break.

Looking at days gone by and people, places and things we used to know can be nostalgic but spending too much time

Today, I am freer to focus on fun and experiences rather than putting up a self-conscious performance hoping for approval. in the past can be excuse not to get going on the present. Take that time and learn a new interest or skill. (See #5). Social media is about image, not necessarily reality. Don’t compare.

7. What are you looking at?

This is slightly related to #6. Buying magazines with young models on the cover isn’t always going to make you feel spectacular about yourself. The November 2013 issue of Health magazine featured the gorgeous actress Julianne Moore, 52, on the cover. In her interview she shared that she has to switch up what exercise she does because “that’s the thing about old age-eventually your hip starts to hurt and you have to switch and do something else.” I don’t know about you but her honesty helps me to know I’m not alone in facing some of these issues and that is comforting.

8. Find gratitude.

Life is never, ever perfect. But it could be that the things we are longing for we already possess and are possibly overlooking them. There may be someone who would love to have a husband like yours. If you recently made a new friend, don’t take it lightly. Know that a friend is a blessing and that they were placed into your life as a gift.

WISDOM & SELF-GROWTH

We have to tell ourselves the exact opposite of these things in order to move forward. Take a statement you believe to be true about yourself at midlife and write it down. Now, rewrite it in a way that is affirming and repeat it whenever you start beating yourself up.

9. Make a change.

Sometimes it is about getting the bangs. Seriously, if you want to try a new hairstyle or color- go for it! Don’t let the opinions of others stop you. Giving yourself some pampering while wanting to look good is a sign that you are growing and changing. It can be a declaration that you are moving forward, moving on and up to something. Pamela Anderson, 46, recently chopped off her long blonde locks into a pixie cut and ran a marathon for charity. She said, “My hair had a life and I wanted to put that behind me.” Taking action can be a catalyst to taking further action and feeling good about how you look can make a big difference. You can be whoever you want to be and look however you want to look, despite the expectations and preferences of others.

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Mal Duane - Using her own life experiences as a catalyst, Bestselling Author and Women’s Life Recovery & Sobriety Coach Mal Duane is passionately committed to empowering women in releasing the shackles of shame, pain and self-condemnation to live a life of passion and purpose. Since her recovery twentyfive years ago, Mal went on to build a multi-million dollar real estate company from scratch, become a Life Recovery Coach and write the award-winning, bestseller Alpha Chick: Five Steps for Moving from Pain to Power. Mal is the host of the transformational Reclaim Your Life teleevent (see full page ad) and has been invited to share her inspirational story and empowering Life Recovery process on over 100 radio shows, numerous telesummits as well as being featured on Fox 25 News. Download Mal’s free Life Recovery Gift Bundle at www. AlphaChick.com.

10. Not giving a damn.

There is a quote that says, “I used to walk into a room wondering if anyone would like me. Now I walk into a room and wonder if I like anyone.” Part of the beauty of aging is no longer having such loud chatter in our heads about being the best dressed or having perfect makeup. Today, I am freer to focus on fun and experiences rather than putting up a self-conscious performance hoping for approval. You can meet a lot of people you might have overlooked by being present in this way and life can feel much less superficial and more authentic.

www.AspireMAG.net | February / March 2014

“If we don ’t change, w e don’t grow. If we don’t grow , we are not rea lly living. G rowth demands a temporary surrender of security .” Gail Sh eehy

FIREWALKER BY KRISTEN MOELLER

he initiation into being a ‘Firewalker” was a painful one. It’s not that I haven’t had my struggles in life. Addiction, cancer, pregnancy losses and the deaths of dear friends are all events I have walked through before. Yet with the loss of my dream home to a raging wildfire, the initiation was complete. I have always been one to examine my struggles and see what I can learn. As with most of us, it’s not that I sit in the middle of a trauma and exclaim the fabulousness of the lessons that will come. It’s that I have been through enough in this adventure called life to know that gifts lie on the other side. No matter how murky or dark the path is, I know they will come. I know I will emerge from each struggle stronger, more confident, more clear in who I am, and more on purpose.

WISDOM & SELF-GROWTH

The Path of a

Since I had declared 2012 to be the “year of letting go of attachments” and then the biggest attachment in my life turned to smoldering rubble taking many of my lesser attachments with it, I knew this too would be one of my great life lessons. In 2011, I was “on fire” with my business. All the pieces had finally come together after decades of dedication and hard work. I was launching into the stratosphere. Then when a wildfire swept through on March 26th, 2012,

everything came to a screeching halt as I faced an uncertain future and many soul-searching questions.

When we are at a crossroads like this, the first questions usually are:

• Why? • How could this have happened? • Will I ever make it through? Later come the more purpose clarifying ones:

• What is the lesson I must learn? • What is it time for me to let go of ? • How can I allow this pain to deepen my spiritual path? • Who will I become on the other side? I asked all these questions and more. And I truly allowed my grief

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process with no expectation that I have these answers clarified for a while. I gave myself that gift and dayby-day, I walked through my pain and grief. I walked through my fire. It was one of the most challenging years of my life. Now on the other side, the gifts are emerging. How did I do this? I turned to my writing and wrote my pain and insights almost daily. As the words piled up, the pain loosened its death grip on my heart. What began as a necessity for survival turned into my life work. “Walking through Fire,” my blog, gave me insight into this next phase. Firewalkers, I realized, were who I had been speaking to the whole time. Firewalkers were my people, my tribe, my soul mates. Firewalkers are those who have experienced their own personal fires - whether through external events that cause grief or simply the internal angst of what it means to be human. A Firewalker allows the experience to forge them into extraordinary humans who are committed to doing

Firewalkers are those who have experienced their own personal fires - whether through external events that cause grief or simply the internal angst of what it means to be human. good in the world and using the wisdom of their pain and struggles to benefit others. For a Firewalker, the power lies in the willingness to allow fire to penetrate their souls while they seize the opportunity to rise like a Phoenix from the ashes.

Firewalkers have been around the block a few times, yet even after life has dealt its blows you continue to walk. You know that even when all looks dark, lightness still exists. You are willing to feel the depth of your pain and the depth of the pain in the world. Fire is a catalyst. It both begins and completes a transformation cycle. As a Firewalker embraces the energy of fire, we become consumed, then lifted out of our limitation. This is not easy work and each of our journey’s looks differently. Firewalkers recognize each other by the glint in our eyes, the cracks in our heart, the scars on our skin, and love in our hearts. Each time we walk through fire, we are faced with the opportunity to be scarred for life - or to truly transform and rise like the Phoenix from the ashes. Firewalkers will continue to rise, again and again.

Firewalkers are:

• Deep thinkers • Brave beyond measure • Sensitive beings • Determined to transform their tragedy into triumph • Committed to allowing the pain of their experience to benefit others • T hose with a gargantuan passion for life

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Kristen Moeller – Bestselling author and coach, Kristen Moeller MS, utilizes decades of training in counseling coupled with her own addiction recovery to champion those who become lost in their wild journey through this wacky world. Her latest book is What Are You Waiting For? How to Rise to the Occasion of Your Life by Viva Editions, November 2013. For more about Kristen, please visit: www.kristenmoeller.com

SIMPLY

Empowered!

Are you Wearing Your

WEIGHTAS

Protection? BY CRYSTAL ANDRUS

o here goes… A BIG HONEST SHARE:

I get that I’m an attractive woman. I get that I don’t have a lot of weight to lose (maybe 15 – 20 pounds). (And let us not forget my huge weight gain in my twenties ... which I subsequently lost after much selfhealing.) I get that to some women they’d be shocked to hear me complaining about my looks ... my body.

Stay with me on this . . . I recently had a revelation whereby I can literally “feel” the Real Me inside of the container that holds me. I can feel me inside my body. I can feel where she ends and my protection begins. The Real Me is actually quite slim. Now don’t get me wrong, the Real Me is not a waif. She’s not “small boned”. She’s not petite. She’s also not a body builder either. She’s Slim. Sexy. Slender. Strong.

But here’s the truth:

I not only “feel” her lately, I hear her, too.

Although I love myself (I even really like myself), I’ve carried a level of protection around the Real Me since I was 18.

She whispers to me. She sings and laughs a lot.

www.AspireMAG.net | February / March 2014

She isn’t angry. She isn’t mistrusting and afraid. She isn’t insecure, comparative, or competitive. She’s Loving. Trusting. Courageous. Secure. Collaborative. Kind. I’m finally starting to get to know the Real Me – from the inside out.

Here’s what I know: I can count on the Real Me. She’ll keep us safe. She’s wise and open-minded but smart. She’s trusting but not gullible, kind but not a pushover. She’s funny. (Actually, I had no idea just how funny she is! LOL) She can be a tough cookie when she absolutely has to be (a.k.a. “tough love”) but she’s a huge wonderful ball of mush, as well. I’ve discovered I don’t need a “physical fence” around me anymore. I don’t need this layer of protection. I have the Real Me. I am the Real Me. Now that I’ve learned how to use my voice; learned how to say no (and not feel guilty afterward); to recognize when someone is about to step across my boundary, invade my space, knock me over, or shoot me down, I can simply speak my truth. It’s okay to speak our truth. Just as long as we don’t do it in a way to step, invade, knock, or shoot anyone down with it.

I’ve done a ton of healing work to deal with the pain and anger I’ve had inside of me. (Eeks, there was a lot!) I also finally realized that I’d built my protection as a sort of “holding tank” for anger. Kind of like a septic tank for your house (those of us who live in the country know what I’m talking about.) A septic is buried in the ground outside of your home. There is a “manhole” on the tank (with a lid) because eventually, it must get cleaned out ... or it will start spilling back up into the house. This is what I call “letting our own stuff make us sick.” I didn’t want all my “crap” to ruin me—and my spirit—so I had mastered this ingenious way of burying my unhealthy emotions in my holding tank (my muscle and fat). Just tuck it away over there. Who has time to deal with all this? I’d simply been given more sh*t than I knew what to do with. Smart, right? I was keeping my anger away from my heart! It served a purpose. My body fat and big muscles (I’d spent years lifting heavy weights) were literally keeping me from fully feeling all the yucky stuff. Most fat people will probably agree with me. Body builders will too. Our armor protects us from feeling. The trouble is the protection eventually turns on us. Sure! We don’t have to fully feel the magnitude of the situation when it’s

WISDOM & SELF-GROWTH

She’s happy. Joyous. Peaceful. Accepting. Forgiving.

happening, but our bodies continue to “hold” the memories . . . the pain . . . the anger, shame, blame, fear, etc. until our lives slow down enough so that we can finally process it in a healthy way and let it go. Now see... this is the problem with dieting... even with joining the gym. If you aren’t ready to let go of your sh*t, no amount of broccoli, protein shakes, or leg lifts are going to do it. If you aren’t ready to dig up the dirt, sift through it, find the golden nuggets (because every painful experience has wisdom to be extracted), and let go of the rest, you’re always going to feel overloaded, overextended, overwhelmed, and/or overweight. My friend, don’t let another year pass you by holding onto garbage that isn’t serving you. Let go of everything and anything that takes you away from acting and reacting from the Real You!

dug up one memory at a time and healed the old buried yucky emotions attached to it; I have all this space left over for happiness to infiltrate. The anger is gone. And thankfully because of my ability to set healthy boundaries, I can trust myself to know I won’t allow bad treatment from anyone ever again. I don’t need a “holding tank” for anger anymore. I’m finally free to be my real “Self” and live without any baggage! Ya... kinda huge, isn’t it?

I just love this healing journey.... Read Online!

I’m certain the Real Me is returning in body, mind, and spirit.

Crystal Andrus – A leader in

I haven’t stepped on a scale. (I don’t believe in them. They’re the devil!) So I don’t know if I’ve actually lost a pound but I feel so much lighter. Emotionally and physically.

The good news is that I’ve finally learned how to spot drama and dysfunction when it’s headed over to my house. I’ve realized I don’t have to answer the door. In fact, I can dead bolt it! Heehee... yes, that’s me peeking through the window at you! The most exciting part is now that I’ve gently

the field of self-discovery and personal very

transformation. tough

From

beginning—one

that could easily have spun her into darkness—Crystal has risen to become an international coaching sensation, three-time, best-selling author, international speaker, TV personality, host of her own “CBS Crystal Andrus Radio Show”, founder of “The S.W.A.T. Institute (Simply Woman Accredited Trainer)”, founder of the new online magazine, www.simplywoman.com, spokesperson for the health & wellness line of products—“Xooma” (sounds like Zooma), as well as a world-renowned women’s advocate. Her latest book about “Woman Energy™” is in the works, and will prove to be her greatest accomplishment to date! (Stay tuned!!) www.crystalandrus.com

www.AspireMAG.net | February / March 2014

HEALTH & WELLNESS How to Add Nutrition Without BY LISA MARIE ROSATI

“I have chosen to be happy because it is good for my health.”

Voltaire

Read Online!

Breaking the Bank

Did you know that eating healthy does NOT have to hit you hard in the pocketbook? As a matter of fact eating nutritiously doesn’t have to be expensive at all. Here are just a few tips that will help you make the most of your food budget and at the same time optimize your health. For more tips, read the full article online.

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Mi glyce x low m like ic fruit with u berries Almo nsweeten n e a quic d Milk to m d k and ake smoo nutritious thie.

l Live & Virtua

UPCOMING EVENTS

nd Cooking a ome eating at h and is less costly e n ating healthier tha out.

CHECK OUT MORE ONLINE!

AspireMag.net

RECLAIM YOUR LIFE EVENT WITH MAL DUANE || DETAILS! 18 Empowering Stories of Transformation - Free access GLOBAL SELF-LOVE PARTY – FEB. 13 || DETAILS! Join the Madly in Love with Me Movement

LIVING the

Goddess Lifestyle

The

Beauty and

POWER of Your Inner

Crone BY LISA MARIE ROSATI

n generations past a woman was considered OLD once she hit the big 4-0. Fast-forward to today… I’m noticing that women in their forties and fifties are just getting started – me included! Middle age women everywhere are living their life full throttle … no apologies being given and no bullshit allowed. I couldn’t be more thrilled to be 46, it’s the best I’ve ever felt and looked. I can pretty much guarantee that my 50th birthday party is going to be an extravaganza of epic proportions in which I will be sure to dance on some tables, sip expensive champagne and spank some asses (yup I’m a spanker, you’ve been warned). You might be wondering why I would behave in such a “devil may care” way… and the answer is simple, because my Inner Crone doesn’t feel the need to edit her words or

her actions – she lives and speaks her truth. I love a good party and I make it a daily practice to celebrate all things big and small … AND I never miss an opportunity to celebrate ME, so my question to you is…

WHY NOT? The Crone is part of a sacred trio; the Maiden, the Mother and the Crone – and because she is the oldest, the crone is also the wisest. Goddess Hecate is the Crone aspect of the Triple Goddess, forming a powerful triad with Persephone as the Maiden and Demeter as the Mother. The Crone is the keeper of the mysteries and her archetype corresponds to wisdom, change, transformation, death, rebirth and banishing. She is most often depicted as a shriveled up old woman, a hag or a witch but honestly I see Crone-dom in a

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SOUND SEXY? Well let me tell you, it is! Many women allow numbers to define them; a chronological number or a number on the scale … I refuse to do that. I have a secret to my youthful appearance, palatable vibrancy and positive outlook and I’m going to share it with you now.

I CHASE FEELING GOOD. I eat foods that will help me feel good, I exercise my body so it can feel good, I make healthy lifestyle choices (like going to bed by 11pm and waking with natural morning sunlight on my face) to feel good, I laugh as much as possible and only surround myself with positive, high vibrational people so I can feel good. The list goes on and on with all the things

I do to ensure that I can feel good. They are all conscious choices on my part.

THIS IS HOW I WOULD DESCRIBE MY EXPERIENCE SO FAR WITH MIDDLE AGE … My head no longer suffers with the chaos and drama of youth, my need to please is far behind me and I stand strongly in my feminine power. It’s a lot quieter in my head these days too. My Inner Critic has been silenced for the most part by divine truth and guidance. Out of my mouth come words of wisdom that I have earned through painful life lessons learned and facing my fears. I own my sexuality and my divine right to revel in the throws of passions hot embrace. I say “no” when I don’t feel like doing something and give myself the permission of full body “YES” when it feels or tastes good. I allow myself to desire things, all sorts of things… even taboo things. I boldly go after what I want without worrying about what others will think. I council clients, family and

my community … I hold their fragile, hurting hearts in my hands as I work my medicine… I create and provide a safe container for healing and transformation to occur. I hold space like never before and hot damn it feels great! I talk to Spirit and Spirit communicates with me. I own my gift of being a spiritual intuitive, a healer, a Priestess and a channel of divine light. I tell others when they hurt me without anger, and that takes courage. I admit my weak points without feeling bad about myself; I simply put some effort towards strengthening them. I have many miles beneath my feet and assorted scars from old wounds that have healed; they give my life character and my heart compassion. I can open my heart in ways that in the past were simply not possible for me; the expansion feels sublime and a little scary all at once. My face shows some wrinkles, things on my body are more jiggly and my gray hair grows in quicker than I’d like but I take that in stride (most of the time … I really hate sitting in the hair salon for hours). The chapters of my life book have accumulated and I

HEALTH & WELLNESS

WHOLE DIFFERENT WAY and I hope after reading this article you will too! I see a Modern Day Crone as being totally feisty, self confident, comfortable in her skin and living her authentic truth using the wisdom collected over her lifetime to guide her words and navigate her actions.

find myself in a love affair with my first-born, my daughter Chelsea. Gone are the days of exhausting power struggles, listening to snotty remarks and having to police her every move. We’re in the most delicious of places; two women who can meet for lunch, talk about EVERYTHING and share a toast to life, love and the pursuit of happiness. Honestly, there is not a person on this earth other than my brother who can make me laugh until tears stream down my face like my Chelsea, what a riot she is! I think this is my favorite chapter with her yet, my second favorite being the time period from when she was 8 months to 4 years old. That was a great chapter too… it kind of all went downhill once she went to kindergarten. But I digress! So many things to embrace… so many things to look forward to; more and more sovereignty, financial freedom, emotional freedom, lazy days with my husband doing whatever we desire, grandchildren, traveling with girlfriends, etc… it’s a delicious list and I look forward to it all! How do you see yourself aging? Do you hold limiting beliefs about what’s possible for your life and your looks as you age? These are conversations that I feel need to be had … in my world women lift each other up, we never compete. We collaborate, hold each other’s hands, heal each other and in turn heal the world. This is possible for you too. The Maiden, Mother and Crone are present in all women at all phases of her life. So in other words, you do not have to be over 40 or 50 to be a Crone. These aspects are symbolic. For example, have you ever looked into a little girls eyes and seen wisdom? That is her Inner Crone shining through, the wisest part of her soul. Have you ever known an elderly woman who

is sassy? Let’s use Betty White as an example, her chronologic age might qualify her as a Crone but Whoo Hoo - that woman is NOT old by any means. The biggest gift you can give yourself is to allow all three aspects of the Triple Goddess to flow in your life; dance free and wild like the Maiden, create, birth and nurture like the Mother and be the guardian of the wisdom and life’s mysteries like the Crone. This is one of my sacred practices, allowing all that needs to come through to come through, when it needs to. I feel a shift in energy on the planet happening right now. An ascension of feminine energy … and it’s so exciting. Collectively we are redefining the definition of what it means to be a women in all of her aspects; Maiden, Mother and Crone. I personally will ROCK my Crone like it ain’t nobody’s business!

I HOPE YOU’LL JOIN ME …

Read Online!

Passionista Lisa Marie Rosati – Passionista and Visionary Lisa Marie Rosati is a renowned Inner Goddess Catalyst for women, Creatrix of The Goddess Lifestyle Plan + Sugar Free Goddess, co-author of the international best selling book – “Embracing Your Authentic Self.” Lisa mentors women around the world on how to become a Modern Day Goddess by consciously designing how to get their health back, balance their feminine and masculine energies, ignite the fire within their souls and live a luscious goddess life filled with sacred practice, passion, radiant health, entrepreneurial success and prosperity.

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INSTANT ACCESS brings you the intimate one-on-one conversations with women who share their personal transformation with the intent to inspire YOU to believe that anything is possible.

Lisa Marie Rosati

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Mary E. Pritchard, PH.D

Mal Duane

Maryellen De Vine

Kim Turcotte

Stacy Corrigan

Lisa Michaels

Shann Vander Leek

Nancy Kerner

Amy Beth O’Brien

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Michelle Phillips

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Saskia Roell

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Inspiring Conversations – Complimentary Gifts New audio conversations and transformational gifts added monthly

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Madly Chasing Peace:

TRANSFORMATION IN 9 MINUTES A DAY BY DINA PROCTOR

hardly ever spend more than three-minutes, three times a day in meditation. The way that I’ve spent these short bursts of time has gradually changed my attitude toward just about everyone and everything in my life, bringing me little by little to centeredness and freedom. If you have a daily meditation practice you like, by all means stay with that. But if you haven’t been able to stick with any practice you’ve tried or you haven’t felt it was effective, you might like to try the 3x3. I think even just 30 seconds of true, uninterrupted inner quiet is better than ten minutes of peeking through closed eyes at the clock, or mentally making your grocery list, while hoping to achieve enlightenment. Connecting inwardly multiple times a day has the advantage over one long meditation of shifting your mindset continuously, and repeatedly reminding you of what’s important throughout the day. Sometimes I don’t want to stop after three minutes and continue to meditate peacefully for 15-20 minutes. But even if I do that, I still make sure I sit for the other two 3x3s that day. The daily goal isn’t to meditate for nine or more minutes in total; the goal is to find that inner calm several times throughout the day.

www.AspireMAG.net | February / March 2014

There are a few different ways that I structure my 3x3s:

That’s when she finds herself looking for ways to access power outside herself (trying to plug her power cord into food or alcohol or other people), even though there’s only one true outlet her power cord was designed for. The same thing happens to me sometimes. When I’m disconnected, it shows up in many small ways. Sometimes I find myself mentally putting others down in subtle ways that make me feel better about myself. I’ve found myself becoming needy with guys I’ve dated, and more irritable if little things go wrong. When I attempt to recharge my batteries by trying to get people to do what I think I need them to do, or treat me the way I want them to, what I’m really doing is trying to plug my power cord into different people or situations and demanding that they be the source of energy that recharges my batteries. But nothing outside of my innermost essence (or God or Source Energy) was designed to supply me with the power that I need, and so it never works. When I find myself doing this, I try to catch myself and see the impulse for what it is: simply a symptom that my batteries are low and I need to plug in to the only source that can give me power. And I do that in my 3x3 meditations.

Many times I will do nothing more than sit quietly with my eyes closed and count how many times my heart beats during the three minutes. When I first started meditating, I tried counting how many breaths I took but kept getting distracted—maybe because there was so much time between breaths that my mind had a chance to wander. For whatever reason, putting a hand over my chest to feel and count my heartbeats with my eyes closed keeps me completely focused. Even if my thoughts are negative or overwhelming before I sit down to meditate, distracting myself with this little task always gives me relief. I t also helps for me to have a mantra or some words I can repeat over and over to give my crazy mind something to put its focus on. My favorite mantra that I use when I’m feeling overwhelmed, anxious or paralyzed with fear is: “I’m open. I’m willing. Show me. Guide me from within.” This mantra puts space around whatever thoughts are choking me and creates an opening inside of me for willingness, letting go and a bit of peace. You can choose whatever words suit you. Other examples are:

a. “I know there is another way to

approach this. Just because I can’t see it right now doesn’t mean it’s not

HEALTH & WELLNESS

What you get in meditation is access to power that is far beyond the limits of your thinking mind. Some people call it God, or Source Energy, or their Inner Being, or simply higher consciousness. One woman I’ve coached thinks of it as re-charging her batteries several times a day. She pictures a power cord extending from her heart that she can plug into an invisible outlet above her body. If the cord is not securely plugged in, or has fallen out completely, she loses her sense of centeredness, of peace and connection.

there. I am open to the possibility of a new idea, a new way of doing this.”

b. “There is space inside me for new ideas to flow in and to show themselves. I don’t have all the answers and I don’t need to. I’m open to new ideas.”

It doesn’t matter if you are praying these words to God or simply putting forth your intention to try to clear a path to access the inner intuitive voice. Either way, it works for me and it has worked for others who have very different ideas of God than I do.

I also use my 3x3 in preparation for conversations with other people or to get ready to do tasks I really dread, or to change anything in my life that is not going the way I would like. In these situations I use visualization to address the situation as it is and make peace with it or replace it with a more ideal situation. In every 3x3 my fundamental intention is to connect with my intuition. I am being alert to the inner voice, or nudge, of guidance that can come only in the silence. This is the source of all transformation, and the first step to the solution to all problems, in my experience. Thus, many of the other games rely on this fundamental 3x3 practice. Once you’re comfortable in your 3x3 and you can feel yourself shift into a more mellow, focused state during your meditations, try to tap back into that state at different times throughout your day. Just for a couple of minutes here and there. I first tried it during my pre-meeting conversations with new friends at the recovery center. The

conversations were usually less than five minutes long, and they were a pleasant thing for me to do, so it was relatively easy to be in that state at the same time. Maintaining that state of inner calm while interacting with others or doing another activity is the next step after being able to find that space within during the 3x3. I can also access this inner space very successfully while taking walks. I used to think walks were boring and pointless. I’m already here at home, I used to think, why

would I leave and walk around the block just to come right back here again? But

the point is the walk itself, not where you’re going. Even a five- or ten-minute mindful walk around the block can shift your mood. The whole point is to be able to be as peaceful and non-resistant in your real life as you are in meditation, by trying it a few minutes at a time.

Read Online!

Dina Proctor - An inspirational speaker, life coach, creator of 3x3 Meditation, and best-selling author of “Madly Chasing Peace: How I Went From Hell to Happy in Nine Minutes a Day.” Endorsed by Jack Canfield, Bruce Lipton, Ph. D. and many others, Dina’s 3x3 Meditation method has helped countless people transform their lives. Visit www.MadlyChasingPeace.com to claim Dina’s three complimentary gifts including a guided 3x3 Meditation for Manifesting Abundance and more.

www.AspireMAG.net | February / March 2014

THE

Wise Woman Way

Midlife

Metamorphosis BY SUSUN WEED

hat do Jean Houston, Budapest, and Jane Pauley have in common, and in common with you and me? They believe that the second half of a womanâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s life is meant to be rich and fulfilling, not an empty nest and depression. Not the doldrums and boredom of retirement following years of meaningless housework, but a bold step out of who we were and who we are and into who we want to be. A woman of our own making. An authentic being who has co-created herself. A woman who has benefitted from her midlife crisis. Menopause marks the midlife crisis for most women. This is a crisis of self-perception as much as a crisis of physical change. Before menopause we are fertile, moon-cycling, nurturing women. Afterwards, and until we die, we are post-fertile, earth-cycling,

www.AspireMAG.net | February / March 2014

Midlife and menopause are opportunities to change the course of our lives. The metamorphosis of menopause can be used as passage to power. Even after menopause, the changes it has wrought in our bodies act as gateways to reach into our most authentic selves, to touch our deepest feelings, and to reveal our finest aspirations. A second calling, a second destiny, a reinvention of oneself, no matter how you phrase it, the second fifty years of our lives, the time during and after menopause, is being redefined and reenvisioned as a springboard into action rather than a waning and a decline. The Grandmother Hypothesis, as expounded by Dr. Kristen Hawkes at the University of Utah, reminds us that menopause is vital to the health and longevity of all the individuals in the clan. Old women are the wise women who keep us all alive. In the circle of life, in the spiral of the DNA, the Crone holds hands with both the mother and the maiden. As we move from maiden to mother in our lives, from She-Who-Does-Not-Bleed, to She-WhoBleeds-and-Does-Not-Die, our dreams and plans change, our vision of ourselves changes. We respond to the needs of life, put aside childish things, and assume the responsibilities of adulthood. Our lives unfold with careers, families, mortgages, payments, responsibilities. And we shoulder

the burdens as they arise. We put our nose to the grindstone and one foot in front of the other, until we are no longer able to see the larger picture of our lives, until we wonder where the joy and satisfaction went. And so it goes, until we are faced with midlife, with menopause, with the opportunity to change. We pass through the portal of menopause: We are melted down and reformed, wrapped in a chrysalis, turned into goo, and remade as a butterfly. We move from She-WhoBleeds-and-Does-Not-Die to She-WhoHolds-the-Wise-Blood-Inside. We reach out our hand and take the hand of the maiden. We close the circle. We become complete within ourselves. We allow ourselves to dream again the dreams of the maiden.

“THE PAST HAS NO HOLD OVER YOU. IT IS THE EASIEST THING TO CHANGE. IT EXISTS ONLY AS AN ELECTRICAL PATTERN IN YOUR BRAIN. CHANGE THE IMPULSE, ALTER THE FLOW, AND YOU CHANGE YOUR PAST.”

– Jean Houston And now we have not only the skills to make those dreams reality, but the wisdom to delegate the work. We come to the time when we may freely put down some of the responsibility and play more at our work. “The past has no hold over you. It is the easiest thing to change. It exists only as an electrical pattern in your brain. Change

HEALTH & WELLNESS

creative women. That can be asexual, sedentary, saggy, and focused on knitting, or it can be sexually free and adventurous, grounded and practical, active, and willing to bend the rules, even in knitting.

the impulse, alter the flow, and you change your past.” Jean Houston taught us to change our past in The Development of Human Capacities, a three-year long live-in experience in creating the Possible Human. And menopause can give you the juice to do some time traveling on your own, to revision your past. Menopause is a winnowing ground, a time to sort through and discard those things that crimp our joy: thoughts, feelings, grudges, resentments, broken hearts, broken promises, broken dreams. Menopause gives us, if we allow it, the impetus to move beyond who we thought we were, beyond our own hard-earned successes and into the vigor of failure. For what is a youthful mindset but a willingness to fail? And old fogey-hood an unwillingness to take chances?! As we emerge from menopause metamorphosis and take our place as Crone, we join hands with the maiden, and permission is granted. We give ourselves permission to try something that we don’t know how it will turn out, to ask questions that we don’t have the answers to, to fall down and get back up again. To have more fun by being more fun, funnier, sillier, less serious.

pictures and stories of women at least 20 years older than you are that you want to grow up to be. What are you dreaming of doing? Find someone who is doing it. What steps are between where you are now and where you wish to be? Big projects are done in small steps. Take one today. With the Crone’s wisdom to protect you and the Maiden’s enthusiasm to lead the way, the second half of your life can be exciting, deep, delicious, remarkable, inviting, enriching, suggestive, serendipitous, moving, joyous, and played to a tune of your own desire. Susun is the author of New Menopausal Years, the Wise Woman Way, Alternative Approaches for Women 30-90, from Ash Tree Publishing, available from www.wisewomanbookshop.com or the online store named after a powerful woman.

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Susun Weed – An internationally renowned

“The future may be longer than you think,” says Jane Pauley, formerly of the “Today” show and a woman who has remade her public image several times, and written about it. If you can imagine it, you can do it. How do you envision yourself in 20 years? Start a butterfly collection now: a collection of

herbalist, author, and director of the Wise Woman Center in New York. She is a revered voice of the Wise Woman Tradition,

where

women’s bodies and women’s

emotions

are valued. Susun is a founding grandmother of the herbal renaissance and the originator of the concept of complementary medicine. www.SusunWeed.com

www.AspireMAG.net | February / March 2014

RELATIONSHIPS

“To be fully seen by somebody,

then, and be loved anyhow - thi s is a human offering that can border on miraculous.” Elizabeth Gilbert

The Five Best Gifts to

ad Re ne! li On

BY MARGARET PAUL, PH. D. y l i m a F r u Give Yo

Many people tout the benefits to kids of being in nature. When we think of giving gifts, we usually think of things to buy for people. Yet if you think back on gifts you’ve been given, it might not be the material gifts you received that are foremost in your mind – it might be the kind of gifts that deeply touched your heart and soul. It might be various ways, other than material things, that people expressed their love to you. There are five gifts of love that we can give to our families that can make a huge difference in their lives. Read the article online.

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1. The G ift of C aring and Com passion 2. The G ift of C ourage 3. The G ift of S ervice 4. The G ift of C reativity 5. The G ift of L ightness of Being

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TRANSFORMING

Relationship

Your

HOW TO

REIGNITE THE

Passion JUST ONE Night!

FOR MORE THAN

BY STACEY MARTINO

alentine’s Day is approaching! Love and passion is on everyone’s mind and in everyone’s heart. There’s also a sense of hope in the air. A new optimism that we can and will experience more love and more passion in our lives and our relationships. This is the energy that excites me so much because Valentine’s Day creates an opening of refreshing energy that feels amazing. Especially since the rest of the year, the energy is quite the opposite.

www.AspireMAG.net | February / March 2014

Even sadder is that by the time one or both of them find their way to me, they find themselves in one of these two relationship patterns. The first, falsely believing that a loss of passion is part of the natural progression of a relationship so they unconsciously agree to go with the flow and accept it. Or second, after living this way for so long, they may have already crossed the energetic line into resentment, anger, judgment and betrayal. Here’s the real tragedy in that.

“Relationships don’t die because of a lack of LOVE, they die because of a lack of passion.” – Tony Robbins

Unless we remain consciously committed to nourishing that feeling of desire and passion in our relationship, it’s easy to lose those feelings for our partner.

RELATIONSHIPS

It’s sad to say, but we are in the midst of a passion-less relationship epidemic. In my intimate relationship work with clients, the number one issue that comes up time and time again is the lack of passion in their relationship. Many couples describe it as ‘being in a loving, caring relationship with a good friend’ or as ‘coexisting under the same roof but with no intimate connection.’ They’ve lost the passion, fun and playfulness they once had and for many, they believe it is lost forever.

Odds are, that just like you, he has no idea where to start to bring that passion back. Maybe he’s numbing and distracting himself too, trying to fill a void inside and find a way to be happy without the passion and intimacy he craves. This would be heart-breaking, if there wasn’t a solution! You can turn that passion and desire back on in a heartbeat and reignite the passion for more than just one night. When you feel desire and passion for your man, you are more likely to be your best self. You find yourself appreciating more of his unique qualities and feel a sense of deep gratitude for the man that he is. You begin focusing more and more on the blessings and gifts he brings to the relationship. (Remember the Law of Attraction – what you focus on expands.)

Passion When you live without passion for long enough, a part of you begins to feel empty inside. You may try to distract yourself with work, the kids, shopping, friends, and other escapes. Eventually, no matter how much you try to numb yourself, you will feel the pang of wanting more passion and intimacy because it is our natural calling.

And, no matter how it looks or feels at this moment, your man wants this too.

Unless we remain consciously committed to nourishing that feeling of desire and passion in our relationship, it’s easy to lose those feelings for our partner. What happens over time is that you allow yourself to become disconnected from that divine energy force that is the life blood of a healthy, passionate relationship.

Here are three simple strategies for reigniting the passion in your intimate relationship: ONE: Stop Withholding! As women, we easily slip into a pattern of withholding our love and appreciation as a “behavior correction” tool or punishment. Whether it is a conscious or unconscious response, let me tell you it is a sure passion killer. No judgment here my friend, I was practically a gold-medal winning withholder at one point. It’s a tool many of us turn to out of self-protection after being disappointed, hurt, rejected or betrayed by our loved one. If you truly desire to bring back passion and intimacy in your relationship it’s time to stop punishing him for all the other times he may have disappointed you. What to do instead? The next time your man makes a bid for your attention, or an attempt to make you happy… choose to accept it and be happy. Lovingly accept his bid for your attention and shower him with appreciation and affection. I promise you that the more you appreciate and respond positively to his attention the more he will do

it. As you nourish and appreciate this new relationship pattern I promise you will find your heart wide open.

TWO: Be Playful and Flirtatious Live, play and flirt! You are wired for this… as women, we all are. Remember that fun, flirtatious young woman of your teens and twenties? She’s still in there somewhere waiting for you to allow her to come out and play. It’s time to reconnect with that fun, playful part of yourself. Call on her to bring a little fun into your world and into your relationship. Your man will love seeing this side of you and you’ll love how you feel about yourself when you are tapped into this vivacious energy. Put away the excuses. As women, we are all busy balancing the many roles we play in our lives. I get it, I really do. I’m a mom and an entrepreneur and I understand what it’s like to have things constantly calling for my attention day in a day out. It wasn’t until I put my relationship with Paul on the top of my priority list that I was able to create the magnificent relationship we have today, which of course, nourishes every other role I held in my life.

THREE: Re-align with your Feminine Core Energy Many years ago, my nickname was “The Ice Princess” and it was very well deserved. After many years of getting hurt and trying to protect myself I had closed off my heart (and my feminine nature). To compensate, I threw myself into my work, where I was rewarded

www.AspireMAG.net | February / March 2014

with much success. In those days, it would be easy to describe me as cold, tough, driven, assertive and achieving all very masculine qualities, which are not all negative, when used as a tool.

Then I met a vibrant, passionate woman who seemed lit up from the inside out. She was happy, playful and affectionate and she even giggled, yes giggled! She seemed to find the beauty in everything and her compassion for all people was astounding. This incredible woman was also at the top of an empire, was extremely influential in life and in business and served as a mama to several kids. She had found the secret elixir I had been searching for. Experiencing this woman was enough for me to declare and commit that if that was femininity, I wanted it. And then...I struggled and I mean I really struggled. I wanted so desperately to be feminine, yet I couldn’t figure out how. I tried and tried to BE more feminine, and I beat myself up every time I felt myself using my masculine tools. This went on for the better part of a year until I had the blessed opportunity to once again meet this inspiring woman yet again. That day she shared a powerful message with me and her empowering words freed

She said, “No one has to teach you how to be feminine. You only need the courage to lay down your masculine weapons and your masculine mask and be the real authentic you! It takes vulnerability and courage...not trying.” The feminine is about being open and not closed... even when you are scared. The feminine feels everything with all its senses and fills up on everything it feels. The feminine is open to and cares for everyone…. and that’s why the feminine sees the beauty in all things. My wish for you is that you feel the spark of your feminine energy inside you. Have the courage to embrace your vulnerability and stay open….even when you are scared! This is just the beginning of your journey my friend! Your path is rich with beauty, excitement, inspiration and laughter! OPEN UP, STEP IN and PLAY!!!

Living a life of passion is SO WORTH IT!

Read Online!

Stacey Martino - A Certified Marriage Educator & Divorce Preventionist. Stacey and her husband Paul created their proven eight step Relationship Transformation System™. Every day, people all around the world are transforming their intimate relationships using Stacey & Paul’s ground-breaking programs! You can find Stacey at www.LoveandPassionCoach. com and on Facebook and Twitter. CLICK HERE to DOWNLOAD your FREE 8 Step Relationship Transformation Audio Program >>> www.LoveandPassionCoach.com

RELATIONSHIPS

But I wasn’t using them as a tool, they had become who I was. I was also lonely, empty, unfulfilled and most of all completely and utterly exhausted from doing it all. The combination of feeling dead inside and the crazy exhaustion was catching up with me. At that time I considered femininity to be weak and vulnerability to be out of the question. I held tightly to the very strong masculine skill set and masculine mask that I wore as a shield of protection.

me forever and today I pass them on to you.

The 10 Branches of

SELF-LOVE Take a Self-Love Pulse Check BY CHRISTINE ARYLO

DO YOU REALLY LOVE YOURSELF? Take a Self-Love Pulse Check and Find Out Where You Need More Love… from yourself!

ew of us would deny that self-love is a good idea. And no woman would tell her daughters or any other woman or girl, “Hey you, don’t love yourself, that’s selfish.” Chances are that if asked, “Do you love yourself?” most women would say, “Yes, of course I do,” when in fact the majority don’t really have a clue what self-love actually means, or requires. This lack of understanding about self-love isn’t surprising when you consider that the current definition of self-love on dictionary. com is ‘conceit, vanity and narcissism’ (no kidding!) Or when you look at the pressures today’s woman faces knowing she can do anything, but exhausted by her attempts to do and be everything.

www.AspireMAG.net | February / March 2014

First you need to know a few facts about self-love:

Self-love isn’t something you have, self-love is something you choose in every moment of every day. In your

daily choices and thoughts, you can either choose fear, guilt, shame, stress and criticism for and towards yourself, or you can choose to give yourself love, such as compassion, care, respect, and acceptance. And that can be hard to do.

The challenge is not in knowing what you should do to love yourself, but in giving yourself permission to take the loving act. Most of us know what the

self-loving things are we should do – like take good care of ourselves, only have respectful relationships, believe in ourselves and go for our dreams to name a few - but we let guilt, fear and shame deter us from making the self-loving choices.

Self-esteem is not the same thing as self-love. You can have selfesteem and still not really love yourself. Self-esteem is a part of self-love – 1/10th to be exact! You need all 10 areas of self-love strong and growing. Because even with high self esteem, without self-compassion, self-care, self-respect and more, you will still make unloving choices for yourself, things like over-giving/over-doing/overworking, staying in bad relationships, or settling for less.

After studying self-love now for over a decade – living it and teaching it – what I’ve noticed is that “Do you love yourself?” is not a yes/no question. It’s not either you love yourself or you don’t love yourself. But instead there are ways that you really love yourself well. Ways in which you totally show up as a best friend for yourself, areas in your life when you easily choose the loving act or thought over fear, blame, shame, guilt, pressure, stress and criticism. And, there are other ways in which you sell yourself short, put your needs last or don’t honor them at all, and don’t accept yourself. These are the places where it is hard for you to give yourself permission to do what a best friend would tell you to do. Your power – and your happiness - comes in knowing where you are weak in self-love and where you are strong, and then making conscious choices and taking simple but mighty actions to grow that area of self-love that most needs your attention. What you focus on grows.

THE 10 BRANCHES OF SELF-LOVE Take a Self-Love Pulse Check

Sometimes self-love can feel so vast and esoteric, too big to even know where to begin, which is why I created the self-love tree, which encompasses all 11 parts of self-love, known as the 10 branches and the roots of self-love. Every person has some area where they need to be stronger in their ability to choose love for themselves, and act as a best friend would, no matter what.

RELATIONSHIPS

BUT HOW DO YOU KNOW IF YOU REALLY LOVE YOURSELF?

• SELF-AWARENESS & HONESTY: You know who you truly are and who you are not, and you have an unwavering commitment to truth about how your actions, thoughts and choices affect your reality and the people around you. • SELF-ACCEPTANCE: You like who you are, and you don’t compare yourself to others, or wish you could be someone else, including a younger version of yourself. You adore and appreciate who you are, including your body. You acknowledge yourself, often.

For you maybe it’s being compassionate with yourself when you fail, so instead of berating yourself you console yourself. Or for you perhaps you are a rockstar at work, lots of self-esteem, but a disaster in romantic relationships, lacking self-respect and self-honor. Or maybe you play small, live life repressed instead of fully expressed, or look to other people for answers, not trusting your own Inner Wisdom, lacking self-empowerment, self-expression and self-trust. Or maybe you over give, over work, over do, exhausting yourself, suffering from weak self-care, self-pleasure and selfworth.

• SELF-CARE: You make sure you get what you need everyday on all levels – emotional, physical, spiritual – every day, without guilt, sacrifice or needing to be a martyr. You don’t over-work, over-give or over-do. • SELF-COMPASSION & SELF-FORGIVENESS: You open your heart to be a loving witness to yourself, without judgment, by sending yourself waves of kindness, understanding and forgiveness that touch, heal and transform your imperfections and humanness through the presence of your unconditional love. You don’t have a constant criticism or perfectionism machine running in your mind.

The question is, for 2014 what is the branch of self-love that most needs your attention, love and focus so that you can grow stronger in your ability to take the self-loving acts that support you to creating the life your heart and soul desire?

• SELF-TRUST: You listen to and follow the guidance of your inner voice, believing that you know what is right for you even when other people think or say otherwise. You trust your inner wisdom over conventional wisdom.

Take a short but mighty self-love pulse check here on the strength of your self-love branches and self-worth roots. Which one feels the weakest or like it needs the most attention?

• SELF-ESTEEM: You have a strong belief in and regard for yourself, a strong confidence in your ability to do and be anything and you believe your gifts are valuable.

www.AspireMAG.net | February / March 2014

• SELF-RESPECT & SELF-HONOR: You only make choices that respect and honor the sacred soul that you are, especially in relationships. You only have loving, respectful relationships. • SELF-PLEASURE: You consistently create, receive and experience joy, no matter how much work there is to do, ensuring always that your soul is fully fed and nourished. • SELF-WORTH:You value yourself immensely based on who you are inside, not on what you achieve, amass or what other people say. You know what motivates and drives you, and you are not motivated for a need for outside validation, recognition, approval, affection, etc. You live your life by your internal value systems not those of society or other people.

MAKE YOUR 2014 SELF-LOVE PROMISE ON SELF-LOVE DAY! In honor of the international day of self-love, Madly in Love with ME Day, on February 13th, every year in February people from around the world choose one branch of self-love and then make a promise to themselves that helps them stay committed all year long to growing that branch.

Self-love promises are like anchors that pull you back into alignment into choosing love in those moments when fear, guilt, shame, criticism, want to creep in and take you down the self-sabotaging instead of selfloving path. A self-love promise is usually stated and written using the words you could say to yourself in the moment, like a best friend, to support you to choose self-love. For example, if your branch to grow is selfpleasure, your promise could be “No matter how much work there is to do, I create space for fun!” Then in the moment when you are about to over work or over give when your soul is calling out for some joy, your inner best friend can say to you, “Hey, you promised, no matter how much work there is to do, you would create space for fun!” And you will gain the power to give yourself permission to take the loving act only you can for your heart and soul. Choose Self-Love this February 13th and choose your self-love branch and make your self-love promise. To take a guided self-love pulse check and for more on making self-love promises, get your free Self Love Promise Kit at www.MadlyinLovewithME.com

Read Online!

Christine Arylo - A world recognized expert on self-love, Christine Arylo is the best-selling author of Choosing ME before WE, and Madly in Love with ME. She is also the creator of The 40-Day Self Love Practices, as well as the co-founder of Inner Mean Girl Reform School, which has helped over 22,000 women transform their inner critics into inner superheroines. Visit her at www.ChristineArylo.com or www.ChooseSelfLove.com.

RELATIONSHIPS

• SELF-EXPRESSION: You let the world see you, fully, truthfully and without apology or holding back. Full, free expression of your heart and soul. • SELF-EMPOWERMENT: You take charge of and responsibility for your life by acting to create the life you really desire, without apology or requiring approval from others.

Calling in Your Beloved:

The Truth About

S UL MATES A

BY SARA WISEMAN

s we approach that magical day, 2/14/2014, our thoughts turn to love—or more precisely, romantic love. It’s a concept that’s been around since medieval times, but it’s reinvented itself over the centuries. Today, when we talk about romantic love, what we usually mean is:

•Y our soul mate • Your true love • Your destiny

No matter what your age, you can look back and determine the love relationships that were significant karmic crossings in your life. In relationships that were positive, you might have been working on soul lessons such as:

• Your one and only • Love at first sight

These are terms for what is energetically referred to as a primary soul mate who’s also a romantic partner. But when we set aside all the champagne-andchocolate that’s the hallmark of modern romance, we understand at a deeper level that these significant soul matings are karmic crossings, and they exist to teach us the lessons of soul growth. Soul mates work on soul growth.

www.AspireMAG.net | February / March 2014

• Trust • Love • Openness

• Patience • Selflessness

In negative or lesser relationships, you might have been working on lessons such as:

• Abuse • Anger • Abandonment

In either case, these karmic crossings helped you to move forward as a Divine being learning in a human lifetime.

Do we just have one soul mate? Just as we have multiple relationships with all kinds of people, we also have multiple soul mates. In fact, everyone’s a soul mate, at some level or another! However, most people use the term soul mate to describe the concept of primary soul mate—that one special person you’re destined to meet; who’s going to change your life, be the butter on your bread, the honey in your tea, and so forth.

No, not at all. Both your past and current partner were soul mates. It’s just that the first soul mate you were with helped you learn a particular karmic lesson or set of lessons. Once those lessons were learned, you were ready to move to a more advanced set of lessons, with the new soul mate. Our soul mates always match us where we are, in terms of our consciousness and heart expansion. You know the saying “like attracts like”? Well, that’s how it works. When you’re immature and not yet conscious, you attract a soul mate who’s at the same place in his/ her development. When you jump levels and expand into more awareness, you meet a soul mate who can match you there.

Why soul mates separate

Many of us will have at least one of these primary soul matings in our lifetime. Often, we’ll have a few. With divorce rates hovering at 50 percent and fewer people getting married at all, the idea of one lifetime relationship is just not part of our culture anymore. Nowadays, it’s likely that people will have several soul mates in a lifetime.

Soul mates separate when they have learned the lessons they were destined to learn together. When this happens—when you’ve done all the work you can do in a particular relationship—it also means that once your karmic crossing is complete.

So, what happens when we meet someone who we think is a soul mate—but, over time, the relationship doesn’t work out? What happens when you split

In other words, once you’ve completed the soul lessons you’ve been put together to learn, then the relationship is also complete. You’re ready to move forward and learn new lessons, with another partner.

RELATIONSHIPS

• Power • Control • Betrayal • Addiction

up from the person you thought was a soul mate, and then eventually, you meet another person who you are equally certain is your soul mate. Does this mean your first partner or spouse wasn’t a soul mate after all?

Most adults have been in profoundly significant relationships that “didn’t work out” over time. It’s not because you didn’t love the person at the time, or because the person wasn’t your soul mate. It’s just that for most of us in modern culture, there’s going to be more than one karmic crossing in a lifetime.

How do you know you’ve met a soul mate? When you meet a soul mate, you know it. There’s an immediate sense of recognition of the soul personality. Many people who have met their soul mates often describe this kind of soul recognition as a deep familiarity, sense that they already knew the person, or of “coming home.” However, even if you recognize the soul personality, the human container may be very different from what you expected! Time and again, clients tell me of meeting primary soul mates who show up much differently from what they expected: they’re older, younger, a different race, a different culture. They’re your perfect soul match, but they don’t look or act anything like what you expected!

The energy of soul mates And then, there is the energy. The Universe often let’s us know when we’re meeting a soul mate in the form of visible energy, such as white flashes, lightning bolts, auras, and so forth. For example, my client Anna did some work with me to call forth her soul mate. Soon after,

she met a new co-worker at a staff meeting, and the minute they shook hands, she felt dizzy. “My knees went weak; I actually had to excuse myself and sit down,” she explained. Shortly after, she was in the company kitchen and who should walk in but this man. As they stood in the room together, “a bolt of lightning leaped across from his body to mine,” she said. “It was bright white, about ten inches tall, and extended the full eight feet between us. I gasped, and when I looked at him, his mouth was hanging open and he looked stunned.” This kind of visible energy is common when soul mates meet for the first time as if the Universe is asking us to wake up, take note, pay attention!

Soul mates are more than romantic Primary soul mates aren’t always romantic partners. They can also be the best friend, family member or colleague we are deeply connected to in our lives. Again, every soul meeting is a karmic crossing, designed to help us work through lessons of soul growth in this lifetime. Understanding this—that we are all here to teach each other—can help us manifest a more joyful approach to life and love, in all the kinds of relationships we have. Read Online!

Sara Wiseman - Sara is a spiritual teacher and author of six enlightening books on spiritual intuition. She host the popular radio show Ask Sara, and is and regular contributor to DailyOM, VividLife, InspireMeToday and more. Visit her at www.sarawiseman.com

www.AspireMAG.net | February / March 2014

CAREER/ BUSINESS

“Your purpose in life is to find your purpose and give your whole he art and soul to it.”

Gautama Buddha ad Re ne! li On

reating The ‘AAA’ Approach to C a Business, and Life, which Thrives

BY SANDRA MARTINI

The “AAA” Approach encompasses a simple decision to embrace everything in your life with: Authority, Audience and Authenticity. Once you tap into your core energy, your passion and bring her bubbling to the surface, you’ll quickly discover there’s no going back. Your soul is here to shine. The key is to stay grounded in yourself, your authenticity, bring that to everything you do and, when overwhelmed or challenged, use that source to tap into your inner strength.

Authority:

Regardless of what you’re doing, stand tall in your power. Embrace who you are at your core and bring that soulfulness and passion to the surface. . .in everything.

Audience: Who are you speaking or communicating with? How can you best serve them without sacrificing your goals, dreams, passions? Where’s the win/win for this particular situation?

Authenticity:

The simplest of all the “A’s”. Be yourself no matter what. To borrow from Dr. Seuss “those who matter won’t mind and those who mind don’t matter.”

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Read article online.

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DOING

BUSINESS LIKE A

Goddess

MANIFESTING and RECEIVING

Grace with

BY ELIZABETH PURVIS

reetings, Goddess!

Welcome back to Doing Business Like A Goddess, where I share key concepts that every feminine conscious entrepreneur must know in order to succeed in today’s new business landscape, plus how to create extraordinary income and impact while honoring that you are exactly who the world’s been waiting for. In the last four issues, I shared the first four key concepts for doing business like a Goddess… 1. Giving Yourself Permission 2. Success Leads To More Success 3. You Must Let Go To Grow 4. Gratitude First You can read these here.

www.AspireMAG.net | February / March 2014

The 5th key concept for doing business like a Goddess is Manifesting & Receiving With Grace.

Here’s the great news: if it’s money you desire – for mentoring, support, training, travel to a seminar, a retreat, or a yummy experience you wish to have – then it’s already here.

THE PROCESS FOR MANIFESTING THIS MONEY IS TRULY SIMPLE: 1. Decide how much you want.

CAREER/BUSINESS

One of the biggest reasons why people don’t create the life they want is…they tell themselves they don’t have the money.

To stay out of the pattern of overgiving and depletion and instead allow success to show up in your life, you must first awaken and accept your divine feminine gift of receiving.

2. Ditch your doubts, judgments and excuses for a few minutes

That’s it. Ridiculously simple, but it works like magic.

3. Brainstorm every idea you can think of to create the money, no matter how uncomfortable/crazy/ off-the-wall it seems

For 10 specific steps on How To Manifest Money For Anything - Every Time, be sure to check out my article here.

4. Take action on what you come up with.

As important as manifesting money is, your level of ability to receive it will highly impact your results as well. You see, women often have a deep desire to give and are sometimes conditioned to sacrifice their needs in order to help others reach their goals. While it may feel like you need to give, give and then give more in order to be successful, over-giving will deplete your capacity for success. Even when the giving is kept in check, this is still only ONE part of the success equation. The other half is receiving.

Let’s be real – receiving can feel a lot less comfortable and often brings up unworthy feelings, fears and disconnection. When left unchecked, these beliefs becomes a breeding ground for sneaky and selfsabotaging behaviors, such as… • Not reaching out to your clients when you have a new offer • Not following up with past clients • Taking too long to follow up with potential clients who contact you • “Misplacing” money or checks (think affiliate checks that end up in a stack of papers, never cashed)

• Not hiring a mentor • Not asking for help • Taking too long to hire a team • Doing $15-20/hour tasks yourself To stay out of the pattern of over-giving and depletion and instead allow success to show up in your life, you must first awaken and accept your divine feminine gift of receiving. The great news is your business provides endless opportunities to flex your receiving muscle, allowing more of the good stuff (clients, income and opportunities) to flow to you with less effort.

HERE ARE 4 OF MY FAVORITE POWER TIPS TO OPEN THE CHANNELS AND RECEIVE WITH GRACE, IN YOUR BUSINESS AND LIFE: 1) Shine a light on what stops you. The first step to embracing the art of receiving is awareness and the willingness to see truth. Where are you blocking the flow, with beliefs like… “I don’t deserve it” “I’m not good enough” “That’s for someone else, not me” “It’s not spiritual to have wants, needs, desires…” “It can’t be this easy” Remember where there is a block or negative belief, there is also an opportunity to reveal and heal the inner struggles that hold you back. Become an insatiably curious explorer and track down the source within.

2) Practice with the small stuff! No matter what your circumstances, the Divine is constantly presenting you with rich opportunities to receive. The more you accept, the more you’ll be offered. You can create the experience (proof!) of the Universe giving you more when you start with the small stuff. In Feminine Magic®, we practice the art of accepting all compliments. It’s one of the most simplest actions, yet for many women it can be one of the most difficult things to do. So practice! When the gal at the bank compliments your hairstyle, say thank you. When the dude at the grocery store offers to carry your bags or holds the door open for you - let him. Remember that no matter how small these simple gifts may seem, energy

www.AspireMAG.net | February / March 2014

expands at will and it is confirmation that you are allowing this energy to flow and penetrate your world.

Let’s say you have a goal to create $200,000 in income over the next 12 months. Which of these two scenarios sounds easier? • Selling 100 infoproducts at 1,000 each over the course of the year, then enrolling 10 of those (highly qualified) clients into a $10,000 program • Selling 1600 hours of your time at $125 per hour When it comes to manifesting, you always have two choices: make it easy for the Divine to deliver exactly what you want, or make it harder. Your business model is one of the first ways to allow money to come to you. Create a structure (or vessel) that allows you to provide more Remember, the more you manifest, the more you need to be able to receive, and then the more you can give. And consequently, if you’re not receiving, then you’re not manifesting fully either. Make the empowered decision today to manifest and receive openly and allow these simple but profound shifts to shape your new world. Until next time –

Love and magic,

Elizabeth

Read Online!

4) Don’t make it hard for your peeps to do business with you! I’m always stunned when I hear women say that they want to make more money, but then they put off things like opening a professional merchant account, investing in a shopping cart, hiring a client care virtual assistant for a few hours per week, and other basics. Or their online infrastructure (order forms, sales pages) is riddled with errors and broken links. These “details” are the lifeline of your business and bank account. When you make it hard for people to work with you, you block the flow of income coming to you. Plus, they’re a huge turn-off for the highend clients who WANT to pay you great money for your work. Say YES to their gift of business and show the Universe that you mean it by getting your order processing and client care ducks in a row.

Elizabeth Purvis - Shows spirit-led, mission-driven women how to price, package and market their services so they create extraordinary income and impact. Known for blending heart-centered sales, Internet marketing, spiritual principles and Universal Law, Elizabeth delivers simple ways for coaches, consultants, practitioners and healers to double or triple their revenues by creating multiple streams of income and enrolling ideal clients at higher fees. www.MarketingGoddess.com

CAREER/BUSINESS

3) Make sure your business model is in alignment with your income goals.

value in exchange for more money, while spending less time doing it.

INSPIRED TO

Write?

How to Start a

WRITING W

Circle BY LISA TENER

hen you think of writing, do you imagine being cooped up in your basement pecking at your keyboard? Or maybe sitting at a café, sipping a latte, jotting notes? Whether you write in a cave or amidst a crowd, writing is still a solitary business. It all comes down to you and your laptop, or you, your journal and pen. Most writers need to balance private writing time by finding ways to be part of a writing community. It’s hard to write well in utter isolation. You often need input from others to make your work the best it can be. And those are two great reasons for finding or starting a writing circle. In a writing circle, you find community. You get feedback on your writing, providing some sense whether you’re going in a productive direction. And most writing circles are free. Of course, you may get what you pay for.

A writing circle may not replace a writing course or good editor. But it can help you refine your writing. You just need to be aware of a few pitfalls and secrets to make your writing circle effective. How does a writing circle work? First, you need to find people. A good number is 4-7: big enough to get several viewpoints on an issue and to hold up if a couple members don’t show. Next, you need to establish a routine. Each person may check in briefly (1-2 minutes max) with their weekly accomplishment and their biggest challenge. What do they hope to get out of today’s meeting? Then, have one member share a piece, perhaps reading aloud, while members follow along and edit. After that, the group provides feedback. Some groups have people hand out the writing one week and provide feedback the

www.AspireMAG.net | February / March 2014

Rules of an Effective Writing Circle: 1. Start with What You Like: Begin all

How to Find Members: 1. Ask people you like to join: Make a list of people who would be enjoyable to work with. Invite them first.

discussion with what works and what you’d like to see more of. Then add suggestions for improvement.

2. Advertise at libraries: Make a flier about

the piece has problems, find a way to say it kindly.

3. Have a ‘trial’ visit: You’ll want to get a

2. Constructive feedback only: If you think 3. Give time to review: If you hand out material ahead, participants can review the material and provide more detailed feedback.

4. Decide

on how much time for each person: You can review one piece a session, or everyone each time, but divide the time and set a timer, so that one person doesn’t hog.

5. Meet

regularly: You can meet every week, every other or once a month, but decide a specific day of the week and time and stick with it. A group that meets once in a while fizzles quickly.

6. Logistics: Determine how often, when,

where, how long, how to send copies of manuscripts (handing out vs. e-mail), how many members and the rules.

7. Genre: I’ve been in groups that focus on

one genre and others that mix several, from screenwriting to novels to how-to books. Either can work, but, often, the more focused the group (same genre), the better it works.

your new writing circle and post it, or ask the librarian about existing groups.

sense ahead of time if it’s a good match. Does the person hog the time? Are they overall positive? Do they add value in their comments or say everything is “great?”

4. Who’s a good member? A good member

contributes to the conversation. Their remarks are upbeat, yet meaningful. They allow others to talk, and their conversation stays on point-they don’t stray into discussing their own life during feedback time. Their feedback is insightful. And Read they show up for meetings. Online!

Lisa Tener – An award-winning authority on writing and publishing books, Lisa Tener guides you to joyfully express yourself in writing. She blogs for the Huffington Post, serves on the faculty of Harvard Medical School’s publishing course, and teaches her own Award Winning Book Writing Courses in person and by interactive teleseminar. Download your free Author Tool Kit at www.LisaTener.com

CAREER/BUSINESS

following week to give members a chance to read and respond thoughtfully. In some groups, everyone gets to share every time. In other groups, you spend more time on one or two pieces and people share every other meeting or so.