SEPTEMBER 10 – DECEMBER 5, 2013
WITH LINDA JOY
EMBRACE
The Truth Of Who You Are
DISCOVER
Your Soul’s Purpose
LOVE
Christy Whitman
Leonie Dawson
Christine Kloser
Laura Hollick
Michelle Phillips
Lisa Marie Rosati
Inna Segal
Margaret Paul
Lone March
Jodi Chapman
Tess Marshall
Jill Hope
Unconditionally, Including Yourself
THRIVE In Your Mission FULFILL Your Deepest Desires CONNECT
With Your Passion And Purpose
CREATE The Life You Envision HEAL Your Story ALIGN With Universal Energy HONOR Your Body ACCEPT Your Brilliance EXPERIENCE
Enhanced Relationships
TRUST Your Inner Wisdom
24 VISIONARY WOMEN
SHARE THEIR HEART-CENTERED WISDOM FOR THRIVING IN YOUR LIFE AND BUSINESS
Karen Russo
Kim Sarrasin
Shiloh Sophia McLoud
Elizabeth Purvis
Kristine Carlson
Ann Webb
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www.AspireMAG.net | August / September 2013
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CONTENTS On the Cover
Christy Whitman New York Times Bestselling Author, CEO and founder of the Quantum Success Coaching AcademyTM, a 12-month Law of Attraction coaching certification program, and creator of the Enlightened Kid Program Christy is a certified Law of Attraction coach.
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AUGUST | SEPTEMBER 2013 EMBRACING YOUR WORTH Wisdom & Self-Growth 18 owning your inherent worthiness by Christy Whitman Vibration is the basis of all magnetism, all desire and all creation. The basic formula is this: Our beliefs direct our thoughts, our thoughts cause us to experience certain feelings, our feelings give birth to new desires, and our desires inspire us to action. The way we perceive the outer world at any given moment is a perfect mirror of what is happening in our inner world. Looking through this paradigm, it becomes clear that the more in touch we are with what truly makes us “worthy” – our presence, our love, and the wisdom and insights that are uniquely our own – the more the world will reflect our own light back to us, allowing us
www.AspireMAG.net | August / September 2013
to see the many ways in which we really do shine. 22 living the big stuff: Expect the unexpected and lean into fear by Kristine Carlson Most of us prefer a normal routine to the imminent changes of life that often seem to choose us… whether we want them to or not. The best strategy to prepare for change is simply to expect the unexpected and keep your heart open for anything. Enjoy smooth sailing,
CONTENTS but when the great adventure of life comes in unexpected, with an open heart, you can weather any storm. 26 simply... empowered! the first step needed to create a magnificient life by Crystal Andrus If you can’t seem to create or sustain success in any area of your life, you clearly have unfinished business that must be cleaned up first. In the powerful exercise that Crystal shares, you’ll discover a tool to looking at your life as an observer—without judgment or shame. It will show you the truth if you’ll allow it. You can keep pretending that it’s going to magically get better, but it won’t. Don’t let DENIAL – Didn’t Even Notice I Am Lying – keep you stuck any longer! You deserve a magnificent life!
“A life worth living is one that is expanding, renewing, discovering, revealing and becoming.” Edwin Mamerto
30 divine connection: now is the perfect moment by Karen Hager The stress and drama of life can pull us out of alignment with our Divine connection. Intuitive guide Karen Hager shares an exercise you can do right now to bring yourself into the present moment, which turns out to be the perfect moment for opening to your true self. 34 how you can embrace your shadow and work with your inner child by Inna Segal In order to regain your inner power and know and love yourself fully, it is important to understand and embrace all aspects of your light and shadow. There are four archetypes which are part of our human makeup, including the inner child, prostitute, victim, and saboteur.
Working with archetypal energy can help you heal past wounds; release self-sabotage; let go of fearful and limiting patterns; reach your highest potential; reclaim your integrity; have more choices; and become self-empowered. 38 7 keys to healing the broken heart of an addict no matter what your addiction by Ester Nicholson Ester Nicholson, renowned vocalist for Bette Midler and Rod Stewart, former addict, teacher, speaker and author shares an excerpt from her own astonishing story from her new book: Soul Recovery - 12 Keys to Healing Addiction....and 12 Steps for the Rest of Us-A Path to Wholeness, Serenity and Success.
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CONTENTS
“Until you know your worth you’ll continue to seek other people’s approval just to feel good about yourself.” sonya parker
powers, and lives deeply inside what she knows to be true. Wild Woman is the source of the feminine, the power of the natural, the alive inspirations and she has sacred powers. When she uses her 9 Wild Woman Super Powers she meets her most wild and precious self and re-members who she is. 42 swept away: how to surrender to the undertow of transformation by Shann Vander Leek In Swept Away, read about how Transformation Goddess, Shann Vander Leek let herself be swept away by the undertow of personal transformation. Plus learn five things you can do to stay afloat while experiencing a significant transition. 46 The 9 wild woman super powers by Elizabeth MacLeod Wild Woman is of her own mold. Wild Woman reclaims her place, brings her natural
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50 awaken your intuition by Cari L. Murphy Awakening your intuition requires nothing more than improving your spiritual “health” and generating some positive momentum! Here are seven easy steps to do just that. You may be surprised at how easy they are! 53 create wealth through awareness & action: how to leverage both the feminine and masculine by Rev. Karen Russo Wealth is both an inner state of consciousness
www.AspireMAG.net | August / September 2013
and an outer state of circumstances. A holistic approach to creating and sustaining wealth includes our spiritual, ethical, emotional, mental natures as well as our actions, circumstances and physical results with money. When we learn to balance the masculine and feminine energetic attributes. God (or life or the Universe or Spirit) includes both feminine and masculine ways of being. Therefore, healthy, vibrant, wealthy living is most effective when you deliberately leverage both the feminine and masculine. 56 colorscope by Elizabeth Harper Colorscope is a unique system designed to stimulate your intuitive skills. By choosing the color you are most drawn to you actively access the wisdom of your subconscious and the voice of your soul.
CONTENTS
”True meaning in life comes through understanding your own nature and learning to accept all aspects of yourself.” kristine carlson
Health & Wellness 60 living the goddess lifestyle: wake up your inner goddess by Lisa Marie Rosati Self-worth and selfesteem … words that have sparked endless hours of introspective thought and have stubbornly adhered themselves as the root of many peoples “problems”. The path of enlightenment is not a path of doing; it’s a path of undoing. Shedding all the protective layers filled with hurt, anger, judgment and resentment so that my Inner Goddess could finally bask in the glorious glow of love, forgiveness, acceptance and pleasure. Lisa shares ten practices that empowered her on her journey of awakening her inner goddess.
64 The Wise Woman Way: Living a Blissful Life by Susan Weed The path to a blissful life is the path of least resistance. The way of bliss is the easy way. A life of bliss flows from a mindset that enjoys the journey. The chaotic, unpredictable, amazing, journey that life offers.
interacts with the world. Our physical body is constant— beating our heart, healing small cuts, expanding our lungs and growing our fingernails—and this happens whether we are conscious of it or not. Our energy field is always listening. If we think a self-defeating thought, it depletes our energy and our aura contracts and becomes more susceptible to other energies. Discover powerful tips and insights that will guide you in working with your energy field.
66 we are more than our physical bodies by Elisa Romeo Every one of us is an energy worker. In yoga, this energetic part of ourselves is known as “the subtle body” or in Taoism as “the light body.” It is the outer layer around our physical body that first
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CONTENTS Relationships 70 are you ready to stop sabotaging relationships? by Terry Gaspard MSW, LICSW The fear of intimacy, or rejection can cause a person to sabotage a relationship – even though they believe they are available or engaged. The truth is if you don’t do the inner work to get
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“Loving yourself is the same as loving another person, the energy of love is just pointed in a different direction.” christine arylo
beyond your fear of being vulnerable or of showing weakness it can prevent you from being totally engaged in an intimate relationship. You may be freezing out the opportunity for love because you are fearful of sharing your inner most thoughts, feelings, and wishes. 73 parenting: what do your children REAlly need from you? by Dr. Margaret Paul, Ph.D. One of the most important things for parents to do is to learn to trust their own intuition. Your feelings tell you when you are on course or off course in your behavior with your children. Most parents want to be good parents. Yet parenting is one of those things that does not have hard and fast rules. Along with trusting your intuition here are four other things that your children really need from you.
www.AspireMAG.net | August / September 2013
76 the richer sex: how to handle earning more than men by Kim Sarrasin There’s a huge cultural shift happening – one-third of women now earn more than their husbands and women make up for nearly half of all employees in the work force. While i celebrate the rise of women, i’m seeing the impact on my female client’s relationships and dating life who are high income earners. What i’ve discovered is that men are not concerned about how much money you make, what they’re really interested in is how strong your desire is to be nurtured and provided for. Kim shares some tips that will give you a great head start with learning how to strike a nice balance between your money success and showing up as a beautiful, radiant prize any man would feel proud to have on his arm.
CONTENTS Career | Business 80 Doing business like a goddess: success leads to more success by Elizabeth Purvis In the last issue, Elizabeth shared the importance of giving yourself permission to be successful while being true to yourself, in all of your brilliance. In her newest column she shares the importance of a woman celebrating her successes (large and small) as a crucial part of growing her business. In celebrating you create a subtle, yet powerful shift that increases your sense of deserving and stretches your “pleasure bucket,” allowing you to receive more fun, joy and even more money into your business and life.
“When we cultivate a relationship with our joy, our hearts and spirits expand and we remember who we are.” carol woodliff
86 is it time for a website makeover? by Kim Turcotte Is your current website helping or hurting your business? In her latest article, Kim Turcotte of Soul Purpose Business Solutions shares the five foundational elements that your service-focused business website must have in order for it to attract, engage and convert more of your ideal clients. 90 inspired to write? embrace your value by Lisa Tener It takes a certain level of valuing oneself— one’s gifts, one’s skills
LINDA JOY
||
and one’s being—to share those gifts with others—to live our passions, to be of service to the world in some way. Lisa suggests starting an Embrace My Worth journal and gets you started with some journaling prompts. The more you value yourself, the more others will be drawn to you and the more opportunity you will have to shine your radiant light. So, don’t hold back. Embrace your gifts, your skills, and your worth in every way. And shine, shine, shine.
Publisher & Editor-In-Chief | Linda@aspiremag.net
Creative & Brand Direction || Rachel dunham | www.HummingbirdCreativeConcepts.com Editorial Layout || Mandy Gates | www.GruveDesign.com Graphic Designer || MANDY GATES | www.GruveDesign.com COO || Kim Turcotte | www.SoulPurposeBusinessSolutions.com Mailing Address || P.O. Box 1149 | Lakeville, MA 02347 | 508.265.7929 ADVERTISING || Email Linda@aspiremag.net Mission to inspire info <Click HERE>
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EXPERT COLUMNISTS CRYSTAL ANDRUS Simply... Empowered!
KRISTINE CARLSON Living the Big Stuff TM
Crystal Andrus is a leader in the field of self-discovery and personal transformation. From a tough beginning—she has risen to become a best-selling Hay House author, international speaker, women’s health advocate, spokesperson for Haylo Health, and Founder of The SWAT Institute. Crystal’s message is one of resilience, strength and inner power. www.CrystalAndrus.com www.SWATInstitute.com
An unyielding believer of Living the Big StuffTM and not sweating the small stuff in order to experience true happiness in life, as a bestselling author and inspirational speaker Kristine Carlson continues to expand on the phenomenal success of her late husband, Dr. Richard Carlson, beloved author of the Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff series. www.KristineCarlson.com www.DontSweatMoms.com
ELIZABETH HARPER ColorScope
ELIZABETH PURVIS Doing Business Like a Goddess
Elizabeth Harper is an internationally acclaimed teacher, intuitive, healer, and the author of the award winning book Wishing: How to Fulfill Your Hearts Desires. Elizabeth is on the faculty at the highly acclaimed Omega Institute in Rhineback, NY and is invited to speak around the world. www.SealedwithLove.com
Elizabeth Purvis shows spirit-led, missiondriven women how to price, package and market their services so they create extraordinary income and impact. Known for blending heart-centered sales, Internet marketing, spiritual principles and Universal Law, Elizabeth delivers simple ways for her clients to double or triple revenues by creating multiple streams of income and enrolling ideal clients at higher fees. www.MarketingGoddess.com
LISA MARIE ROSATI Living the Goddess LifeStyleTM
LISA TENER Inspired to Write?
Passionista Lisa Marie Rosati is an Inner Goddess Catalyst for women and the Creatrix of The Goddess Lifestyle Plan. Lisa mentors women on how become a Modern Day Goddess by consciously designing a luscious Goddess life, cultivating radiant health and creating a lucrative business using and directing their feminine fire. www.GoddessLifestylePlan.com
SUSUN WEED The Wise Woman Way
An award-winning authority on writing and publishing books, Lisa Tener guides you to joyfully express yourself in writing. She blogs for the Huffington Post, serves on the faculty of Harvard Medical School’s publishing course, and teaches her own Award Winning Book Writing Courses in person and by interactive teleseminar. www.LisaTener.com
Susun Weed is an internationally renowned herbalist, author, and director of the Wise Woman Center in New York. She is a revered voice of the Wise Woman Tradition, where women’s bodies and women’s emotions are valued. Susun is a founding grandmother of the herbal renaissance and the originator of the concept of complementary medicine. www.SusunWeed.com
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www.AspireMAG.net | August / September 2013
FEATURED CONTRIBUTORS
christy whitman
kim sarrasin
rev. karen russo
cari L. murphy
DR. margaret paul, PH.D.
elisa romeo
elizabeth macLeod
shann vander leek
karen hager
kim turcotte
TERRY GASPARD
inna segal
ester nicholson
Share
YOUR WISDOM! WITH OUR READERS
CONTACT US TODAY TO LEARN ABOUT OUR AWESOME CONTRIBUTOR OPPORTUNITIES!
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LETTER EDITOR
FROM THE
“Courage starts with showing up and letting ourselves be seen.” BRENÉ BROWN
Welcome to the August/September 2013 “Embrace Your
Worth” issue!
“It’s time to deconstruct the myth that worthiness must be earned. Like the keys to the kingdom in every fairy tale we watched when we were little girls, it was within us all along.” – Christy Whitman
The quote I opened with captures a universal truth that I believe many women struggle with – the myth that our job, relationship, looks or financial status is what validates our worth as women, as individuals. The truth, as Christy Whitman (cover feature) shares in her article Owning Your Inherent Worthiness, is that in turning inward for our validation we discover the Divine truth that we are worthy just for being who we are. Along with Christy’s empowering feature article, you’ll discover nuggets of wisdom, hope and inspiration throughout the Embrace Your Worth issue of Aspire. From Inna Segal’s How You Can Embrace Your Shadow and Work with your Inner Child to The 9 Wild Woman Super Powers by Elizabeth MacLeod this issue is filled with feminine wisdom to support you on your journey of self-empowerment, self-love and embracing YOUR worth as a woman.
Connect with me! om/ http://www.Facebook.c lindajoyinspires om/ http://www.facebook.c y aJo PublisherLind
I’m excited to announce the launch of Season 3 of Inspired Living Secrets sacred telegathering. This season I’ve invited 24 heart-centered feminine leaders, authors and business visionaries to join me on the topic of Heartcentered Wisdom for Thriving in Your Life and Business. I look forward to having you join us. (See inside cover for full page ad and all the details.)
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LINDA JOY Publisher & Editor-In-Chief | Linda@aspiremag.net
Here’s What I’m Reading Right Now...
FROM MY BOOKSHELF
The Gifts of Imperfection: Let Go of Who You Think You’re Supposed to Be and Embrace Who You Are by Brené Brown A leading expert on shame, authenticity, and belonging, Brené shares ten guideposts on the power of Wholehearted living— a way of engaging with the world from a place of worthiness.
WISDOM & SELF-GROWTH
“Everything that happens to you is a
reflection of what you belie ve about yourself. We cannot outper form our level of self-esteem. We ca nnot draw to ourselves more than we think we are worth.”
Iyanla Vanzan t
Read Online!
Wisdom
on Tap
BY Shann vander leek
Intuition is available in each of us. It just gets lost under layers of experiences, judgments, mistakes, authority figures, inner critics etc. We often shroud our internal compass at an early age to stay safe and remain small. Dig yourself out from under the layers of junk and you will find a buried treasure more valuable than you can imagine. This fortune found is your wisdom on tap. Here are some tips to help you develop and use your intuition as your guide.
ors
Journa
l Journal ing can g intuitiv e mess ive bring you a ge inner w isdom. s from your
ols Symb
aph & Met
ill ition w u t n i r ou of sym imes y Somet in the form titive e p show u mbers or rep u n bols, hors. metap
Makin
g De
cision Releas s e your questio univer se n it. Whe and then sle to the e n mornin you wake up p on g, chec in the k what c omes u in and see p for y ou.
Meditate Create some time to be still and notice what comes up for you.
CHECK OUT MORE ONLINE!
AspireMag.net
l Live & Virtua
UPCOMING EVENTS
Inspired Living Secrets: Season 3 || DETAILS! 24 Visionary Women – Thousands in Free Gifts – Free Access Insider Secrets with Elizabeth Purvis || DETAILS! Transforming More Lives with Your Heart Word - Free Training Become a Certified Law of Attraction Coach || DETAILS! Quantum Success Coaching Academy with Christy Whitman
OWNING
your
Inherent
Worthiness
F
By christy whitman
rom the time we were old enough to watch our first fairy tale, we as females have been inundated with ideas about what makes us truly worthy – of love, of the metaphoric white castle, and of having all our happily-ever-after dreams come true. Even if the message is hidden between the lines, we get it loud and clear: the girl who wins the kingdom is dutiful, self-sacrificing, and almost always surrounded by people (including herself) who don’t recognize or appreciate her worth. Thanks to the good fortune of being kissed by a handsome prince or having a foot dainty enough to
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slide into a tiny slipper, her destiny is forever altered and all she ever wanted is heaped upon her in lavish abundance. She sheds her former identify of peasant, misfit or slave girl and steps into her true potential – as a princess, a goddess, a queen. From the admiration of others, she finally gains what she’s been seeking all along: the validation that she is lovable; that she is worthy. As we enter adolescence, of course, this message gets layered with additional external yardsticks by which we are invited to gauge our inner worth: Are we pretty enough? Sexy enough? Skinny enough?
www.AspireMAG.net | August / September 2013
What’s wrong with this picture is not just that it’s overly simplistic, but that it’s based on a premise that is inherently flawed. Beliefs about what makes us deserving and desirable as women are so pervasive that often the only way we’ve learned to assess our value is by looking at ourselves through this filter. The lie that many of us have mistaken for the truth is that inner worth is something that is bestowed on us by the outer world; that like a Disney princess, only the love and acceptance of others can convince us that we are good enough to love and accept ourselves. If we accept this premise, the path to achieving all that we desire becomes one of amassing enough evidence, accomplishments and accolades to finally prove that we are worthy. Life is seen as a competition; resources are scarce, and we are constantly reminded of all the ways in which we, by comparison, are falling short.
perfume – as well as the $30 billion more American women spend annually on diet products and programs. Both industries operate inside the paradigm that perfecting our outer package will deliver us inner peace. That our culture has so thoroughly accepted this “outside in” approach does more than make us faithful consumers of anything that promises to make us more acceptable. It also keeps us forever racing toward the next external milestone – and the next one after that – in an attempt to finally prove that we’re worthy. No wonder so many of us are discontent, discouraged, and flat-out exhausted, right? If I had a magic wand, I would most definitely use it to give women a view of themselves through an altogether different looking glass. After all, the most fundamental power bestowed on us as human beings is the power to determine the lens through which we choose to see ourselves and our lives. And our perception not only colors our reality; it actually helps to create it.
To be a Goddess is to stand in the full knowledge of our inherent worthiness and in the presence of all full power.
It is an ugly truth that an underlying belief in our own unworthiness fuels the $11 billion dollars we spend each year on beauty products like cosmetics, toiletries and
As a certified Law of Attraction coach, I’ve spent the better part of two decades studying, applying, and teaching others about the powerful internal forces which are at work behind the scenes in the creation of everything we manifest in our external lives. Understanding these universal laws – which include not only the Law of Attraction but also principles such as Polarity, Allowing, Potentiality, Sufficiency and Abundance –
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Wisdom & Self-Growth
Can we force our bodies to conform to the images of perfection drilled into our heads by pop culture and Madison Avenue? If so, say the billboards, commercials and magazine ads, then we might just be worthy enough – of love, success, adoration, respect… the things our deepest dreams are made of.
is like removing the cover of a clock and discovering the internal gears that make it tick. The hands we use to tell the time are just an outer reflection of a hidden inner mechanism. In a very similar way, our experience of worthiness (and happiness and abundance and general fabulousness) are states of being that are driven from within. Trying to inject them like a cosmetic filler from the outside in is about as effective as manually turning the hands of a clock and expecting it to keep time. But when the inner vibration created by our thoughts, feelings and beliefs is one of knowing that we are inherently worthy, we effortlessly attract from the external world an endless variety of situations, people and experiences that reflect and reinforce this inner knowing. Vibration is the basis of all magnetism, all desire and all creation. The basic formula is this: Our beliefs direct our thoughts, our thoughts cause us to experience certain feelings, our feelings give birth to new desires, and our desires inspire us to action. Like the internal gears that drive the hands of a clock, it is our inner vibration – not our outer actions – which orchestrates the process of manifestation. The way
we feel about ourselves in the privacy of our innermost thoughts is not known only to us; it is broadcasted to the far corners of the universe through our vibration, and is reflected back to us in every encounter, every endeavor, and in every aspect of our lives.
So, for example, if we have developed a core belief that we are somehow inadequate, this belief will inform our thoughts, fueling an
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internal dialog that might go something like this: I’ll never be as interesting as so-and-so. Nobody is going to hire me. Who would ever find me attractive? These thoughts, even if they take place at a subconscious level, affect our feelings and alter our vibration; causing us to notice, latch onto, attract – and ultimately create – life experiences that are consistent with those beliefs. In a very real sense, the way we perceive the outer world at any given moment is a perfect mirror of what is happening in our inner world. Looking through this paradigm, it becomes clear that the more in touch we are with what truly makes us “worthy” – our presence, our love, and the wisdom and insights that are uniquely our own – the more the world will reflect our own light back to us, allowing us to see the many ways in which we really do shine.
What this means is that if we desire to feel beautiful, lovable, and absolutely, inherently enough just as we are, our job is to first generate those feelings within ourselves. This is the key to attracting anything we seek, actually. When we are in tune with the truth of who we are, we don’t need anyone or anything to confirm it. Our “feel good” no longer depends on anyone else telling us how wonderful we are or how good we look. We have no need to seek outside validation because we are generating our own validation from within. This vibration of self-love is both magnetic and palpable. It shines forth like a beacon, drawing to us people and experiences which confirm what we already know to be true. It cannot work in reverse. The feeling of enough-ness
www.AspireMAG.net | August / September 2013
It’s time to deconstruct the myth that worthiness must be earned. Like the keys to the kingdom in every fairy tale we watched when we were little girls, it was within us all along. It is this realization – not a pill, a night cream, elixir, or magic potion – that awakens the Goddess within. To be a Goddess
is to stand in the full knowledge of our inherent worthiness and in the presence of all full power. It is not a construct that we have to make perfect and then wear like a mask. The Goddess emerges from within. Read Online!
Christy Whitman – A New York Times Bestselling Author of Taming Your Alpha Bitch: How To Be Fierce and Feminine (and Get Everything You Want!), CEO and founder of the Quantum Success Coaching AcademyTM, a 12-month Law of Attraction coaching certification program, and creator of the Enlightened Kid Program. Christy’s life-changing message reaches over 100,000 people a month and she has been seen on The Today Show, The Morning Show and The Marilyn Dennis Show in Canada. She has been quoted in Seventeen, Woman’s World, Woman’s Day, Teen Vogue, People Magazine, Hollywood Life, and Knot Magazine. As a certified Law of Attraction coach, her work has been promoted by and featured with best-selling authors like Marianne Williamson, Dr. Wayne Dyer, Marci Shimoff,. She currently lives in Montreal with her husband, Frederic, and their two boys, Alexander and Maxim. Meet her at www.ChristyWhitman.com and www.7EssentialLaws.com.
“If you ide ntify only w ith your bo its reality, r dy and ather than w ith your sp its reality, th ir it an en you’re te that dimin mpted to th d ished mate ink rial assets s diminish w o m e how ho you are . But you a merely a b re not eing of the material w are a being orld; you of unlimite d spirit. A spirit there n is no lack. You are no d in just becaus t lacking e your circ umstances are.” Marian ne Willia mson
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Wisdom & Self-Growth
cannot come from the outside in. It can’t be given to us by anyone except ourselves. As Marianne Williamson so beautifully points out in A Woman’s Worth – which is every bit as relevant today as it was when it was written nearly twenty years ago – “We can’t look to the world to restore our worth; we’re here to restore our worth to the world.” We were created to be self-sourcing; all attempts to seek validation from others leave us hungry in the end.
LIVING the
Big Stuff !
TM
Living the
Big Stuff: Expect the
Unexpected and Lean into
M
FEAR
By kristine carlson
ost of us prefer our normal routine to the imminent changes of life that often seem to choose us…whether we want them to or not. Change-seekers are a rare minority. However, change will come; it’s unavoidable and constant. Life has seasons; sunny summers transforming into autumns. Autumns freeze into winters, and then winters melt into springs that birth new life and new opportunities. Spencer Johnson said: “Change happens when the pain of holding on becomes greater than the fear of letting go.” For example, we can see this, sometimes, in relationships and marriages that aren’t what they once were. Perhaps you’ve outgrown each other or you’ve grown up and apart?
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www.AspireMAG.net | August / September 2013
– Spencer Johnson If this is you, it’s important to ask yourself what is it costing you to stay in a relationship that is depleting your life force rather than nourishing your soul? Fear of the unknown and the unexpected has a way of paralyzing us, when, in fact, it is in the unknown that the whole universe is waiting to unfold. It’s exciting and creative to dive deep into the depths of your soul and that part of you that is formless yet palpably present and create from this place. I’ve learned that leaning into my fear, especially in areas that my ego likes to make me hide, is the same as leaning into my authenticity. Just behind the fear is your vulnerability and behind that is your greatest strength. It’s quite the cosmic joke that our alter ego keeps us from living in our true nature but this simple principle of leaning into fear is a game changer. Once you realize that it is only the ego using fear to hold you back, then when you feel fear about a direction or opportunity that comes your way, rather than avoid it, move towards your fear. Neale Donald Walsch came up with a brilliant acronym for fear: “False Evidence Appearing Real.”
to expect the unexpected and keep your heart open for absolutely anything. Without resistance, you are more likely to embrace change and transition easier if you are aware that life can “change at the drop of a hat” - like receiving a dreaded phone call or life altering news that may be positive or negative. Remembering, too, that all things are temporary and “this too shall pass” really helps me when I’m in a tough spot. Change isn’t always bad. In fact, your life can be altered in an instant by meeting a new unexpected friend, or getting a better job offer or by falling in love with a life partner. You never know, and this is what
The best strategy to build faith and invoke grace and prepare for change is simply
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Wisdom & Self-Growth
“ Change happens when the pain of holding on becomes greater than the fear of letting go”
makes life a true adventure full of mystery. It is in the not knowing where all the creativity emerges. This is where possibility exists at its greatest level. Years down the road when looking back, we can see that the changes we’ve endured, and those that were truly pluses, have served us well and created new beginnings within the endings. In fact, those things that were difficult to navigate but forced us to act were exactly what we needed to propel us into our next level of greatness and perhaps what we now know to be our life’s purpose. That’s the power of change. That’s the promise of awakening. That’s the momentum of transformation. For years, our lives (Mine and Richard’s family life) rolled along, so well, so beautifully that I began to question why we were so richly blessed without many challenges. We chose, we worked hard, we loved with open hearts. I was incredibly grateful for all our blessings, but deep down, I knew that these golden years would change. Some might say that if you think “the other shoe will suddenly drop” then you’re creating that. I, on the other hand believe that our common sense wisdom tells us that life is filled with a lot of stuff, and no one escapes the journey that is laced with joy and hardship, too. And, when the shoe finally dropped, it dropped fast! I guess you could say I’m a realist that is truly optimistic because I choose happiness and peace no matter the circumstances. I lean into my fears like a guidepost for being my most authentic self. I change what I can but accept those things that I cannot change. This is how to invoke
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grace and to allow life to unfold while moving in the current of all happenings. This is how to stand empowered by all change that comes your way. Enjoy smooth sailing, but when the great adventure of life comes in the unexpected, you can weather any storm with an open heart. Read Online!
Kristine Carlson – An unyielding believer of Living the Big StuffTM and not sweating the small stuff in order to experience true happiness in life, as a bestselling author and inspirational speaker Kristine Carlson continues to expand on the phenomenal success of her late husband, Dr. Richard Carlson, beloved author of the Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff series. Learn more at www.KristineCarlson.com and be sure to download your Free Mom’s C.P.R. Kit at www.DontSweatMoms.com.
www.AspireMAG.net | August / September 2013
ve when we “We cultivate lo vulnerable and allow our most to be deeply powerful selves e n, and when w seen and know ual connection honor the spirit that offering that grows from ect, kindness with trust, resp and affection.” wn Brenè Bro
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SIMPLY
Empowered!
The First Step Needed to
Create A Magnificent
Life!
BY Crystal Andrus
Staying busy exhausts us. Holding on keeps us stuck. Avoiding ‘what is’ robs us. Running away disempowers us. Our saving grace is that our consciousness will continue to show us what must be cleaned up in order for us to heal, evolve, create, and sustain.
W
— Crystal Andrus
hen it comes to creating an amazing life, most of us just want to get on with it and get to the good stuff. We’re ready to get down to business. We want to forget the past and move on. Let bygones be bygones. We’re embarrassed about, or ashamed of, certain parts of our lives. What’s the point of looking back?
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And yet, inevitably, similar to a very long anchor that gets dropped overboard as we’re sailing down that wonderful river of life, something always happens that keeps us stuck right where we were. Why can’t we keep our raft going downstream? Why are we replaying the same story over and over? We thought we’d dealt with this! Or worse, why are we replaying the same story with
www.AspireMAG.net | August / September 2013
just a different person or scenario?
Self-sabotage is a clear sign that you have something weighing on your conscience. Repress your feelings—your embarrassment, blame, sorrow, sadness, anger, or jealousy—in whatever way you’ve learned, and they’ll find a way to reappear. As long as you try to resist uncovering “it,” dealing with it, or healing it, it will persist. The burden of carrying it, whether or not you’re aware of it, will exhaust you. Weight gain, financial messes, health problems, addictions, disorganization, and relationship woes are ways in which repressed thoughts, feelings, fears, and unmet needs manifest themselves in your outer world. If you can’t seem to create or sustain success, you clearly have unfinished business that must be cleaned up first! Only you can clean up your own stuff—even if you think it would be better for someone who’s bigger, stronger, richer, or smarter to step in and save you! What I promise you is that once you clean things up (no matter how hard it may seem), you can take the
It Is What It Is Most of us have a hard time seeing the truth about our own lives: the truth about ourselves, our situation, choices, fears, and motivators. We have a hard time accepting that we’ve created the circumstances we’re in—that life is what we make it! So if things aren’t so great in your life, you must ask yourself, Why would I create this? Whether or not you choose to see it, the answer is always there: It is what it is. Are you willing to face the truth and shine a light on “what is,”without any judgment, excuses, justification, shame, blame, guilt,or regret? If so—if you’re ready to take a peek at things—you’re ready to begin the process of creating a magnificent life. If not—if you’d rather choose to deny accountability or not face yourself—then this article isn’t for you . . . at least not right now. Cleaning up your life takes courage. It takes honesty and hard work, and you must be prepared to face the music. It can feel tough at times, but so illuminating at others. It all starts with stepping outside of yourself, almost like an observer, and letting your life be your mirror . . . your truth . . . your gift. Why not look at your life today but with one catch: Imagine that you didn’t know the person staring back at you. Try it. Stand before a full-length mirror and describe the person you see. What would you think of her? What would your reflection tell you about her? Would you see someone who takes
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Wisdom & Self-Growth
Well, until you’ve truly cleaned things up, they will keep cropping up! Until you face your past, your not-so-wise choices, and your debtors and demons; and until you confront the reality of what you’ve fed your body and how you’ve starved your soul or shrouded yourself in shame, you can continue to avoid the truth, but you can’t hide—at least not from yourself! Your guilt and fear will eat away at your ability (and, eventually, even your desire) to succeed; they’ll rob you of your power and keep you struggling in the dark. Playing it small will become normal, and you’ll never realize your potential.
next step in creating an incredible life! Unfinished business drains your energy and robs you of strength and integrity.
care of herself? Someone who eats well, exercises, and honors her temple? Would you see someone smiling, happy, confident, and self-assured? What do her eyes say? Her skin? Nails? Hair? Teeth? Clothing? Weight? Posture? How does she talk to herself when she’s all alone? Now imagine you’re a fly on the wall in her home. How does she speak to her family—spouse, children, parents, and/ or siblings? How do they treat her? Does she thrive on stress, always creating drama and complications? Or does she speak her truth, even if the people around her don’t always agree with her views? Does she keep secrets, preferring to handle things (or at least some things) alone? Or does she live her life like an open book? Does she spend beautiful quality time with those she loves most? Does she hug, kiss, and say “I love you” often? How does she talk about her friends when they aren’t around? Her mate? Parents? In-laws? Children? Is she as honest in person? Is she honest at all?
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How is her sex life? Is she passionate and uninhibited or uptight and boring? Does she constantly think about her past, reliving old fights and hurtful comments? Has she forgiven those who’ve hurt her, or does she bring things up whenever she needs justification or quick retaliation?
clothes, and her basement filled with stuff from 15 years ago? Does she have a poverty-hoarding mentality, or does she trust in the flow of life, spending and saving? The truth? What about her income,
Is her home harmonious, loving, and light? Is her bedroom a beautiful, sexy, feminine sanctuary? Is her bathroom a mini spa retreat? Are there soothing candles, soft music, and wonderful bath products to caress her skin? On the other hand, is her kitchen cluttered, her freezer stuffed with old food, her closet crammed with
You deserve a
magnificent life!
www.AspireMAG.net | August / September 2013
Look at her work. Is it fulfilling, purpose driven, and satisfying? Does it light her up? What does it say about her? Is it balanced with play? Examine her health. How does she eat? Does she smoke, drink excessively, or take drugs? What’s her cholesterol ratio? Her blood pressure? Resting heart rate? BMI? Does she even know the answers to these questions? Does she take responsibility for her wellbeing, or is she expecting her doctors to fix her when things fall apart? Perhaps she’s so much in denial that she doesn’t even believe anything will ever fall apart, even though she’s neglecting her health? Review her habits and hobbies. (And not the version she’s been sugarcoating.) The truth! Does she eat too much, drink too much, shop too much, or gossip too much? Does she waste time on
mindless Internet sites or spend money carelessly? Or does she read great books, listen to motivational CDs, journal her feelings, and take action on her plans and dreams? Is she in denial, squandering her most precious commodity—time—or is she clear, sharp, focused, and inspired? Look deep into her heart. Do you see trust, acceptance, love, and forgiveness, or frustration, anger, animosity, and regret? Do you see longterm true-blue friendships and an honest and deeply committed passionate relationship; or do you see a few fair-weather friends, a lack of intimacy, fear, longing, and loneliness? What does her reflection
say about you? This is your life. She is you. Let her life be your mirror— without judgment or shame. It will show you the truth if you’ll allow it. You can keep pretending that it’s going to magically get better, but it won’t. Don’t let DENIAL – Didn’t Even Notice I Am Lying – keep you stuck any longer! You deserve a magnificent life! If you need help “Cleaning up Your Life”, visit me at www.crystalandrus.com and download my 7 FREE GIFTS – seven mp3s emailed to you every day for a week; all designed to help you let go of anything that no longer serves you, while helping you step into your greatest life! Read Online!
Crystal Andrus – A leader in the field of self-discovery and personal transformation. From a very tough beginning— one that could easily have spun her into darkness—Crystal has risen to become an international coaching sensation, three-time, best-selling author, international speaker, TV personality, host of her own “CBS Crystal Andrus Radio Show”, founder of “The S.W.A.T. Institute (Simply Woman Accredited Trainer)”, founder of the new online magazine, www.simplywoman.com, spokesperson for the health & wellness line of products—“Xooma” (sounds like Zooma), as well as a world-renowned women’s advocate. Her latest book about “Woman Energy™” is in the works, and will prove to be her greatest accomplishment to date! (Stay tuned!!) www.crystalandrus.com
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Wisdom & Self-Growth
debt, and long-term planning? Does she know her worth, and does she receive it? Is she financially independent? Does she live within her means? Has she planned for the future while enjoying the present? Is she afraid or excited?