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Torah Thought
B A LT I M O R E J E W I S H H O M E . C O M
THE BALTIMORE JEWISH HOME
AUGUST 27, 2020
Man of the World By Rabbi Zvi Teichman
There are certain flaws that are chronic and cannot be cured. The male members of the nation of Ammon and Moav, the products of the incestuous act of desperation when the daughters of Lot thinking the world was coming to an end mated with their father Lot, are forever condemned, despite having converted to Judaism, from entering the congregation of G-d, prohibited from ever marrying a standard Jewish women. The reason for their being so ostracized stems from their ancestors lack of gratitude to the descendants of Avraham Avinu. Despite the fact that Avraham saved their patriarch Lot and their mothers — the daughters of Lot, first from captivity in the hands of the four kings in the battle of the four and five kings and once again years later from the upheaval of Sodom, owing their entire existence to his intervention and merit on their behalf, they betrayed this loyal ‘brother’ when Avraham’s descendants left Egypt, ignoring this beaten relative, never offering them bread and water, nor any brotherly concern. It would seem then, that this trait of ingratitude is anathema to the essence of what comprises a Jew. Could it be that simply not going forward in greeting their relative and offering food and drink disqualifies all its male descendants for all of posterity from ever attaining a full status as a member in the congregation of G-d? The Torah though adds one more reason why the Moabites are to be shunned. The Moabites fearing being overtaken by their ‘cousins’, hired Bilaam to curse and eradicate the Jewish nation. Wouldn’t this desire to place a powerful curse upon them eclipse the
rather minor offense of their not having reached out to them in kindness? Why would the Torah even mention their lack of brotherhood as a sign of their ungratefulness when they displayed a much harsher display of this character flaw in wanting to affect them with terrible curses? There is a famous Yiddish expression that goes: וואס האב איך איהם אזוי פיל גוטס געטאן אז ער האט מיך אזוי ? — פיינטWhat great favor have I done to him that he hates me so much? It is one thing to lack appreciation for a kindness done, but when one’s ego doesn’t let him rest in the knowledge that he is indebted to someone else, prodding him not merely to defensively ignore the favor that came his way but to develop a hatred for the one that exposes ‘my’ vulnerability, that is when ingratitude becomes a fatal flaw. One who is totally absorbed with himself and his wants, needing constant validation, will be incapable not only of gratitude but in valuing another person at all. Lot is saved from the upheaval of Sodom. The angel directs him to seek refuge on the mountain. Lot begs to let him stay in Tzoar instead, which is closer by. The Midrash explains that Lot feared being in the proximity of Avraham which would make him pale in significance and preferred being among others of lesser stature so that he may appear righteous. The angel accedes to his request. Did the angel err in directing him to a location that might endanger Lot due to his diminished standing? Certainly not. His concession was an affirmation of Lot’s inability to see beyond himself, which didn’t permit
him to be portrayed as saved solely in the merit of Avraham. How indignant! Even when his very life is at stake Lot’s narcissistic attitude pleads desperately for a meager portion of merit, enabling him to ‘survive’ on his own credit, denying the merit of his loving, selfless and devoted Uncle/brother-inlaw, Avraham. How pathetic. One who is blind to anyone but oneself is undeserving of kindness. In fact, regarding this nation specifically the Torah forewarns — You shall not seek their peace or welfare, all your days, forever. The Targum Yonoson on this verse asserts that this prohibition extends not only to the gentile members of these nations but even to a Ammonite or Moabite who converted and is now fully Jewish is afflicted with this ‘genetic’ flaw and one must refrain from acting kindly toward him so as not to violate this prohibition to ‘not seek his welfare’. Is it possible to fathom that the ‘Torah of Kindness’ could expect someone to survive amongst our people without ever being the recipient of kind-heartedness? Rabbi Eliezer of Metz, the 12th century French Tosafist, asserts that kindness may not be initiated to the members of this corrupt nation but one may repay acts of benevolence they have extended our way, with kindness in turn. He brings proof from an episode where King David acted kindly towards Chanun, the son of the Ammonite king Nachash, in gratitude to his father Nachash who gave refuge to a member of King David’s family. Perhaps the antidote to this inherent defect is to force a member of these imperfect nations to become so devoted and selfless towards their fellow Jews so that others in turn will be permitted to respond to them in kind. The very first message in the acronym of Elul alluding to the verse in Shir HaShirim, ודודי לי- אני לדודי, I am
to my beloved and my beloved is to me, is the word אני, ‘I’. We must first discover ourselves. Who am ‘I’, indeed? The great Gaon, Rabbi Shimon Shkop writes that our job is to expand the who ‘I’ am to include our family, friends, community and the world, coming to the understanding that we were placed in this world to define who we are by the yardstick of how far reaching our actions are in impacting the world around us. “If I am not for myself, who is?”— Each one of us must take ownership of that responsibility, to define the ‘I’ — for no one else can. “But if I am for myself, who am I?” — If we only seek to placate our personal needs and stoke our ego, existing solely within the space from the top of our heads to the sole of our feet, then we are indeed nothing, and have no true identity. )(הקדמה שערי יושר One of the tactics of Elul in assuring a successful Day Judgment, the great scholar and ethicist, Rabbi Yisroel Salanter suggests, is to become a person, שרבים צריכים לו, whom the masses need him. In the words of the famed Mashgiach, Rabbi Shlomo Wolbe: The masses need him - one who is not an egoist, one who does not live for himself! His attributes: kindness, patience, love for humanity. Pure in fear, who toils in Torah. One doesn’t have to be an Askan, a community official but just to share in the burden of others even if he never leaves the walls of his four cubits. The true image of a Jew is one who is valued and needed by others. May we each become ‘men of the world’ in defining the special role we each play in promoting the honor of Heaven. In that merit we are guaranteed a favorable judgment on Rosh Hashana.
