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Relativity

"The world is such a funny place," Remarked a topsy-turvy Ace, A-sliding down a curve in space; "But from this angle I can see No gently sloping theory I am inclined toward gravity. And even Einstein would compute That time and space are both acute When dropping in a parachute."

Three Necessities

There are three things a man needs in order'to realize the fullness of life and its meaning.

First, a faith which shall carry him through every storm without fear or despair.

Second, a goal in life which, like a beacon light, shall always shine in the distance, and which, like a magnet, shall draw him to it irresistibly.

Third, a sense of humor which will teach him to estabIish right values. Having this he will learn to win and lose, and he will know that both are life-that one cannot b6 without the other.-Clipt.

Twins

"That makes a difference," said the small, boy as he clipped a piece off the left ear of one of the twins.

Modern Miss Muffet

Little Miss Mufiet sat on a tufiet, And made of her knees such display, That the old-fashioned spider, Embarrassed beside her, Was actually frightened away.

Fear

Primitive man found it to be his worst Gll€tnf, the Romans built a temple to it, and man to this day, in spite of the advances of civilization, still cowers before the specter of his most disturbing tormentor-FEAR. (Silent Partner.)

Advertising

This collection of cosmic forces which for want of a better name we call advertising, is remaking the world. Second only to machinery is its importance in the new and better order. Both have necessarily arrived together, for they are interdependent. The one creates wares, the other creates markets. A fine machine is just as great an expression of man's intellectual, yes, even his spiritual forces, as is any compounding of words in poems or books. It is exact logic done in iron, civilization's ranking achievement, an unmatched boon to humanity. And advertising is foremost among the factors that keep it in service. Togethgr machinery and advertising make up the fundamental contributing cause of America's unprecedented prosperity.Glen Buck.

Good Advice

Orator: "What is the principal trait a man should show toward a woman? Again I ask-what is the principal trait ?"

Voice: "Trate 'em rough."

THE FISHERMAN'S PRAYER

"Loid suffer me to catch a fish

So big that even I, In telling of it afterwards Shall have no need to lie."

WHO IyIION THAT WAR?

Two old Scotch women wer.e discussing the war.

"Ayu," said one, "It's sad tae think o' a' the lives lost and the terrible destruction o' property."

"It is that," assented the other, "but there's two things aboot the war that gives me a lot o' comfort."

"Aye?" queried the other, "and what micht the twa things be?"

"Weel, we licked them. That's ane o' the things, and the ither. is the gran' help we got frae England."