Circle of Roses: Honoring the Women of Roseland and Rosemoor

CIRCLE OF ROSES Honoring of

Roseland

the and

Women Rosemoor

by Naimah Thomas

“There is no greater agony

than bearing an untold story inside you.”

- Maya Angelou

WHO I AM My name is Naimah Thomas; I’m a Black Femme born and raised in Chicago

and currently work as a licensed professional counselor, art therapist, and artist.

My clinical work and art practice often explore the intersections of art and mental

health, primarily in BIPOC communities. Utilizing art to shift narratives around

healing, mental health, and creating spaces where exploration and re-imagination

are valued. Most of my visual work is informed by my lived experiences as a Black

woman, artist, and therapist. I’ve had the opportunity to work with a range of

people across the lifespan in community, correctional, and nonprofit settings. I

received my Master’s in art therapy from the School of the Art Institute of Chicago

and a Bachelor’s degree in Graphic Design from Columbia College Chicago.

4

WHAT INSPIRED THE PROJECT? The Circle of Roses was born from the collective vision of dr. moore (ConTextos),

Lisa Kenner (ConTextos), Necole Muhammad (Chicago CRED), and myself (with the

support of the Illinois Humanities Envisioning Justice Grants).

“Envisioning Justice engages Illinoisans in conversation about the impact of mass incarceration in local communities and invites organizations, collectives, and individuals to use arts and humanities to devise strategies toward a truly just society.”

- Illinois Humanities

My initial Envisioning Justice 2021 grant proposal project was originally titled

The Forgotten. I wanted to provide a space for individuals and families who have

been negatively impacted by mass incarceration and the intersections of mental

health and divestment within Black communities. The Forgotten sought to create a

space

for

individuals

to

process

their

feelings

of

grief,

loss,

resistance,

and

resilience through creativity. The design was to meet virtually over the course of 4

– 6 two-hour virtual sessions.

Oftentimes people remain in a silo and have very little opportunity to process

being separated from loved ones and have very limited resources to process grief

and loss. Communities oftentimes don’t get the care they need, which can have a

negative

impact

on

a

person’s

well-being

and

the

ability

to

reconcile

with

survivor’s guilt. The initial project was to use art and building community to reveal

what is sometimes lost and be able to uncover what has been forgotten.

6

WHEN MENTAL ILLNESS AND INCARCERATION COLLIDE...

Today, over 50 percent of prison and jail inmates in

the United States have a diagnosed mental illness,

a rate nearly five times greater than that of the

general adult population. — Bryan Stevenson

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In 2014, right as I was gearing up to start graduate school, a family member

was heading down a path of no return. They were in their junior year of school, on

a path to become a physical therapist, and had been recently diagnosed with Bi-

polar disorder from a school psychologist. Shortly after being diagnosed, they

were admitted to the Madden Mental Health Center, located in Maywood, Illinois.

Despite my pleas to do a full evaluation and provide linkage to direct services,

Madden determined they were not a threat to themselves or others; they would be

released

a

few

days

later.

Shortly

after

being

released,

my

family

member

reached out to me with an ominous message in the early afternoon that I was

unable to decipher at the time. I had every intention of connecting with them in

person to see if I could help in any way. While their life was spiraling out of control,

I was transitioning out of my full-time job to attend school. I didn’t have the

resources to take time off from work nor did I have the means to provide my loved

one with a place to stay.

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The same day I received the ominous message, my good friend reached out to me

a few hours later to see if I had a chance to see the news. I told her I had not. I

rushed to look online to find out my loved one had spiraled out of control and

caused harm to people within the community we grew up in. I was devastated and

had little to no time to fully process my emotions before a barrage of tags from

strangers on social media started catapulting my way. I rushed to secure my social

media pages, make things as private as I could, and I scrambled to figure out

what to do next. Here we are 7 years later. They have been incarcerated since

June 2014; not much has changed: the tags eventually stopped, and the articles

were no longer in circulation, but the survivor’s guilt still remains. I grapple with

knowing my loved one is not safely locked in a cage and can't access the proper

mental health services to break free from the cage in his mind.

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Some days, weeks, and months, go past and I have become so engulfed in my

day-to-day that I forget to remember them. Not because I choose to, but because

some things become so overwhelming it’s easier to forget… if only for a moment.

Then I remember how I didn’t have the resources to provide them with access to

therapy; I remember that I was a parentified child and have been working to break

free of generational curses and trauma; I remember that I did the best that I

could. Somehow it is not enough. Sometimes I dream about how they must think I

have forgotten them--the pain and anger they must feel towards me. I know that I

am not alone; I know that I’m not the only one who feels powerless, yet powerful. I

know that there are so many others who don’t get to share their stories, who don’t

get to process their grief and may feel powerless to change the system that is all

too often unkind and unjust to Black and Brown communities.

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CIRCLE OF ROSES WATERING OUR GARDENS

WATERING OUR GARDENS, SOWING SEEDS The Forgotten was initially a 4–6 week project culminating in a book, featuring

images and text. Initially, after working with dr. moore and ConTextos for another

project, I reached out to her to gain some insight on the most ethical and fair way

to find participants for the group. dr. moore provided me with more insight into the

various programs offered and communities ConTextos works with and brought in

Lisa

Kenner

to

help

brainstorm

the

next

steps.

dr.

moore

and

Lisa

shared

an

upcoming Authors Circle being provided to the women of Roseland and Rosemoor

for the 1st time in ConTextos' history through Chicago CRED. dr. moore, Lisa, Mrs.

Muhammad, and I met over several weeks to craft what the program could look like,

identifying women to participate in the circle. The project shifted several times due

to the ongoing pandemic, lack of resources in Chicago (specifically the west and

south sides), the ongoing violence in Roseland and Rosemoor, and time limitations.

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Eventually, the project was re-named the Circle of Roses and shifted to in-person

meetings to ensure participants would be able to engage as much as possible and

provide a supportive space for one another. Although my initial goal for the group

was to discuss grief, process trauma, discuss mental health and wellness in our

communities, and to have space to discuss the impact mass incarceration has had

on our lives, and as much as I wanted to fulfill the necessary parts of the grant, I

realized the women truly needed a space to be seen, to process with one another,

and ultimately water their own gardens free of my desired outcomes.

Working closely with Ms. Muhammad and a small but mighty collection of

women Authors, ConTextos facilitators Lisa Kenner and dr. moore, we co-created

a much-needed space of communion, a space for a gentle coming together. In its

earliest

stages,

the

group

met

online

over

Zoom,

starting

the

process

of

establishing connection and community in the ether. And as things in the real

world changed, so too did the circle.

One truly wonderful aspect of this endeavor was the group’s willingness and

ability to adapt to an ever-changing landscape. From the initial orientation back

in February of 2021, it was clear that the circle would need to move and flow as

the

women

navigated

life

under

COVID-19,

as

the

city

opened

up,

as

their

everyday existences shifted in relation to the complex realities of life in Chicago.

As the women lived and loved, as they overcame and thrived, their circle, the

Circle of Roses, was there to bear witness, to support, to hold firm.

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The beauty, scent, and delicate petals of a rose perhaps suggests a degree of

fragility; however, the opposite is true. Roses are an extremely hardy plant. Indeed

many strains are disease-resistant and hard to destroy. The same might be said

about the magnificent bouquet of Black women who comprise the Circle of Roses.

This is neither meant to suggest, however, that the hardships and challenges these

women handle on the regular are any less real or any less devastating nor that

these Black Roses do not need and deserve nourishment and care. Their lives are

complex and complicated AND they survive and flourish and raise the future at the

very same time.

15

After the creative art-making sessions ended, the women had the opportunity

to travel to Charleston, South Carolina to continue supporting one another outside

of their day-to-day lives. This was a chance to experience a fresh perspective

away from Chicago. This retreat was a necessary space for all of us; it was

powerful, supportive, and sparked joy in us collectively. We created space to

embrace one another, to let go, and return to self. Creating a sisterhood of strong

women, whom many see as flawed. They are more than their experiences and

deserved to have space to create amongst one another, to explore their stories

beyond the city limits of Chicago, to learn about their ancestors, and stretch. Time

away allowed us to explore our own individual stories with no interruptions, no

barriers, just the power of strong women.

Charleston, SC

San

kofa

16

SOUTHERN ROOTS SOUTH CAROLINA, 2021

FAMILY AFFAIR SOUTH CAROLINA, 2021

HISTORY OF ROSELAND AND ROSEMOOR

uth er, So

Theat State

enue an Av Michig

TO PHO

DIT: CRE

nd

a , Rosel

L PAU

TIS RAI PET

HISTORY OF ROSELAND AND ROSEMOOR

In the 2006 article, Roseland's early roots were on display at a museum written by Oscar Avila, a Tribune staff reporter. Avila speaks to residents of Roseland about its Dutch roots and how white flight changed the trajectory of the budding community. The newest museum celebrating a Chicago neighborhood is 4,100 miles away, in a tiny Dutch village. Created with the help of former residents of the Roseland neighborhood, the new museum pays tribute to the Dutch settlers from the town of Eenigenburg who made a perilous sea journey in 1849 to what they called the "high prairie," now Chicago's Far South Side. About 25 descendants of those original Roseland settlers made the reverse trip last week to help dedicate the new Eenigenburg town museum.

Roseland Christian School Student Body -

The 1910 graduating class of Roseland Christian School's 104th Street building.

20

PHOTOS

COURTESY

OF

WWW.WIKIWAND.COM

And many of the estimated 2,500 known descendants of the Roseland settlers

raised

money

and

scoured

their

attics

to

donate

photos,

clothing,

and

other

materials dating to the 1800s.

The story of those first settlers is one of hardship, survival, and ultimately

success. But their descendants recognize that is only part of Roseland's story; the

20th

Century

chapter

that

saw

Dutch-Americans

leave,

replaced

by

African-

Americans, is one of racial strife and hard feelings. "It is so heartbreaking and

painful to me that I can barely cope with doing this work," said Jill Eenigenburg,

who grew up in Roseland, now lives in Seattle, and is the chief liaison between the

museum and descendants. Paul Petraitis, a Chicago historian who grew up in

Roseland and has researched the neighborhood extensively, said the tumultuous

transformation in the 1960s and 1970s is difficult to talk about and elicits "every

kind of emotion, from nostalgia to smoldering rage."

21

Because it is a touchy subject, he noted that "it makes sense that the first history

of the Dutch in Roseland would be back in the old country, rather than here." The

settlers

from

Eenigenburg

survived

a

brutal

boat

journey

on

a

ship

named

Massachusetts of Boston, a voyage that claimed the lives of 19 travelers. When

they arrived in Roseland, the settlers recreated their farm life and later established

booming businesses after the arrival of the Pullman Co. just a few miles away.

Roseland

and

nearby

South

Holland

were

two

of

the

four

main

Dutch

settlements in the Chicago area, according to historian Robert Swierenga's 2002

book, "Dutch Chicago." Although only Grand Rapids, Mich., rivals Chicago as a

Dutch

center,

people"

in

Swierenga

the

area

noted

because

that

of

the

the

Dutch

visible

immigrants.

22

have

presence

remained

of

an

German

"invisible

and

Irish

In the early 20th Century, Lithuanians, Italians, and other Europeans also moved

into Roseland. The most profound changes began in the 1950s and 1960s when

African-Americans began relocating there, causing a wave of "panic peddling

that spread like a brush fire" among white residents, said Petraitis, who lives in the

Pullman neighborhood.

“White flight was taking place over much of the South and West Sides, but the changes in Roseland were swift and sometimes difficult.”- Petraitis In 1970, 44 percent of Roseland residents were white. By 1980, that number was

2 percent. In the decades since, the neighborhood has struggled with its share of

gang crime and poverty. The once-thriving South Michigan Avenue business strip

has lost its luster, but many residential blocks are well preserved and new housing

is rising on some busy blocks.

23

CIRCLE OF ROSES - NURTURING OUR ROOTS

"IT IS IN THE ROOTS, NOT THE BRANCHES, THAT A TREE’S GREATEST STRENGTH LIES." - MATSHONA DHLIWAYO.

Once we all made a unanimous decision to shift the group to an in-person

experience. The women wrote memoirs, shared stories, created art, and cultivated

a space to hold one another stories. Each participant engaged in the weekly

sessions and shared at their level of comfort. Some used the gift of spoken word,

rather than create visual depictions of their experiences. Using art and expression

to process what they have been holding with the invisible suitcase activity or

sharing what it means to be Black in America. The women recorded their stories

via podcasts interviews, strengthened their bonds, and grooved to a Circle of

Roses playlist on Spotify. Additionally, they planted seeds in South Carolina during

a weekend retreat. None of this would have been possible without the vulnerability

of the circle, the facilitators, the space, and the rich lived experiences of all the

women involved in the project.

25

ART MATERIALS Materials

used

for

the

sessions

were

carefully

selected,

based

on

my

experiences working in community settings and as a multimedia artist. Materials were

selected

based

on

accessibility:

cost,

how

difficult

would

it

be

for

the

women to find the materials on their own, could the materials be repurposed for future projects. I wanted to provide the women with as much variety as possible without

overwhelming

them.

It

was

important

thorough with the materials provided.

26

for

me

to

be

thoughtful

and

WHAT IS A MEMOIR?

A Memoir is a real story, by and about the author, that reflects their personal perspective on a specific experience in their life.

Focus on specific moments, a slice of life.

Evokes emotions An opportunity to reflect, look inside self

How has something changed me?

Why am I the person I am today?

What are turning points in my life?

What has informed my perspective?

28

CIRCLE OF ROSES 6 WORD MEMOIRS INSPIRED BY ERNEST HEMINGWAY'S LEGENDARY SHORTEST OF SHORT STORIES."FOR SALE: BABY SHOES, NEVER WORN"

Rise and Fall, Shine at Night

Quit Playing Press the Gas

Think Logic, Ten Toes, Moon Child

New Baby, Money, Loyalty, Happiness Change

Need To Go Have To Stay

Life Battle, Young Mom, Think Before

Vulnerable Move Forward Go Back Return

This Year Far By The Worst

Terrible Challenge Given to Be Continued

Should’ve Stopped at the Stop Sign

Teen Mom Foster Parent Community Activist

She Thought She Came She Conquered

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AUTHORS CIRCLE VALUES

Be Brave Be Candid Keep an open mind Expand your comfort zone Collaborate Seek diverse perspectives Stop think. Feel Ask for help. Offer support Share and receive feedback Embrace your growth. Embrace your truth.

Step forward. Lean back.

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EXPRESSION THROUGH CREATIVITY During the creative sessions, the intention was to have space for the women to discuss how they have been impacted by systems of harm, address their needs, and ultimately support healing and growth through creativity. The women despite all they were experiencing helped me to see that they simply needed a space to be.

The invisible suitcase and affirmation jar directives were just a few guided

experiences shared at the beginning of our creative sessions to build empathy, self-compassion, and support for one another.

CREATIVITY SUPPORTS Processing

various

experiences

with

others

or

individually.

Memory and

Help

-

Connecting

lived

experiences

with

patterns

behaviors

us

connect

difficulty

or

Creativity within

and

to

ourselves,

challenging

can

be

a

outside

way of

feelings,

and

express

emotions.

of

your

31

connecting community.

to

others

INVISIBLE SUITCASE ART DIRECTIVE Throughout our lifespan, we tend to pack our invisible suitcases with beliefs, experiences, items (i.e. blankets, clothing, jewelry, keepsakes, etc), and memories that may have helped us get through difficult moments in our lives. These beliefs, experiences, items, and memories may have helped us to survive and may travel with us as we navigate life.

During one of our circles, we

THE PAST

discussed our invisible suitcases and created visual

LESSONS

art and stories depicting

MEMORIES

what people have been carrying in their suitcases

TRAUMA GRIEF PAIN

and what they no longer had space for.

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BRI - INVISIBLE SUITCASE There are many things that were given to me that I was never meant to carry alone. My suitcase has been extremely heavy, but it is getting lighter. Soon, it will be empty. I am. I have everything I need. I don’t have to be burdened with excess anymore. I can expel the unnecessary back into the world. It’s someone else’s turn.

NAYA - INVISIBLE SUITCASE No more time for empty space!

Grow past my past.

Not hide it, express it with the biggest smile on my face.

It’s out the window now.

I’m bright like the sun.

I can draw now.

ANONYMOUS - INVISIBLE SUITCASE It’s kind of tough thinking about my suitcase. Some things still sit in the back of my mind every day. I sit and think about it all the time. My suitcase is heavy. I feel there is room. Room for something new but maybe better.

33

ANONYMOUS - INVISIBLE SUITCASE Every April and the beginning of May for the last decade has been the same.

Building toward her birthday, followed twelve days later by her death date. The irony is that this period also marks Spring, the blooming of things, the start of colors bursting, and nature coming to life. But for her, it was the opposite because her existence became too much. Her invisible suitcase was full, bursting at the seams, and the baggage it contained "killed" her. I carry secondhand baggage forward… Love lost in the fog of exhaust fumes. A future that will never be. My invisible suitcase is heavy, particularly in late April and early May. Perhaps someday I will learn how to lay this burden down.

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AFFIRMATION JAR ART DIRECTIVE Rather than only focusing on pain, discomfort, stress, I invited the women to create affirmation jars. Jars served as a container for each woman to create space to appreciate themselves.

After they completed their jars, I invited the

women to create positive affirmations for one another.

This activity helped to

create cohesion, build self-compassion, and support co-creating a healing space rooted in building community with one another.

Find the can

a

jar

jar

is

with

a

wide

reach

lid,

your

materials

you

magazine

clippings,

Use

so

sure

you

inside.

Decorate

glitter,

make

enough

jar

beads,

scrap

clippings,

with

have

old

mail,

etc.

paper, etc

whatever

i.e.

to

I AM

magazine create

W

your

affirmations.

Some

examples

I

am

I

deserve

My

could

ENOUGH

be

enough!

past

to

rest

does

not

define

my

future.

Invite

others

affirmation

to

OR TH Y

add

to

your

Use

your

need

of

jar

when

you

are

self-compassion

in

and

care.

jar.

35

CIRCLE OF ROSES - KHALIAN

I'm a Scorpio. Surviving Roseland, PTSD, and striving for better.

KHALIAN - ON MENTAL HEALTH (02KHALIANBACKSTORY02.MP3)

It’s hard (not having full custody of her beloved daughter), but I think it’s a life lesson. It’s for me to appreciate her because I didn’t really have a good relationship with my mother. . . .

I always had like behavior problems, you know in school or whatever and that used to get to her. But what I didn’t like was my momma used to always run to systems.

You know like “maybe you need to get evaluated.” But maybe I’m just hurt off my daddy not being around. Or I’m just hurt cause I don’t know what love is.

I feel like she never really looked into me; she just went straight to putting me into lil crazy houses. And that’s what’s wrong with me though cause I would see people who really had problems, who really needed to be in there and I would be like, “oh, ok. this is not me.”

38

KHALIAN - ON MENTAL HEALTH So that’s what changed my behavior problems a lot. Like these people really act like this cause they can’t control it. I’m acting like this cause I can’t get my way or I’m hurting inside.

KHALIAN - ON INCARCERATION I feel like something had to happen cause I was locked up for like almost two years due to fraud and forgery, And it’s like before I left my mom was like this strong lady you know like. And then like when I came back, she was like this drunk.

And I kept asking everybody like, “What happened?” Cause when you call she could always cover that up you know. I never really knew or heard it through the phone, but when I came home, I was like, “Naw! Something happened.” You know, “why she like this?”

I don’t even know what happened. I just know I went to jail. Got out. And my whole world was just like to myself. I had to figure it out. And I really feel like that’s why I got pregnant.

39

KHALIAN - JOY OF MOTHERHOOD I’m actually happy as ever to be a mom. Like, I be doing stuff with my baby that I’ve never done, you know like, as a child. LIke she’s 3 and she just went to Vegas, That’s something that my mom didn’t even think about doing or whatever. At the age of 3, she (my daughter) done did a lot of stuff that I didn’t do until, I got like, 12.

40

CIRCLE OF ROSES - CAITLIN

I am me and I love being me.

CAITLIN - EFFECT OF INCARCERATION ON MOTHERS (04CAITLIN AFFECT OF INCAR ON MOTHERS.MP3) I did three years in the penitentiary. I did those three. And when you there you never think about it like that other people are doing time with you. Before I left my mom, she was perfectly fine, cool, calm, collected. Everything was . . . I lived states away . . . Everything was going smooth. When I went to prison, it took a big impact on her. And it took for me -- cause I had a phone conversation. I was mad cause I was like 20 dollars short on my books, and I was just mad, and I was just like “yall don’t know how it feels to be behind these walls.”

My momma hung up. So I called my little brother and was like “you can tell you momma while she hangin up, when I come home she don’t have shit to say to me.

Don’t say nothing to me at all; just keep her same energy. Keep her distance.” My brother was like, he was blue, this is my little brother. “Imma tell you right now.

Imma be honest with you. Nothin’s the same . . . It’s all bad. You ain’t doin this time by yoself. We doin this time with you. She don’t cook for holidays . . . She just sit in her room and drink and cries.”

43

CAITLIN - EFFECT OF INCARCERATION ON MOTHERS . ...I really think I’m in here doing this time by myself, but everybody that sending this money, that’s answering the phone, doing videos, they doing this time with you.

And we don’t never know that when we go to jail that our impacts on people that we don’t think give a f*** about us, they do though.

CAITLIN - SUPPORTING OTHER WOMEN IN THE SPACE .

So, it’s (difficult situations) not your karma. This is just your test, you know, to get yourself together. Focus on you. Clear your mind. Let you get a different look . . .

So don’t ever think it’s your karma. Our karma come back differently. We do get some of our karma with our children. Yes we do. . . . But this (time) is just for you to take a moment, you know, relax, breathe, cause you know you always got your child. . . . So don’t ever think this your karma. This is just your time to just do what you gotta do. . . .

44

CIRCLE OF ROSES - NAYA

I go by Naya. I am a Leo and I am fair with all.

NAYA - LOVE AND AFFECTION (07NAYADR.MOORE LOVE AND AFFECTION.MP3)

But my mom’s side of the family, now that world has got so aggressive and scary among everyone, everybody be like “Aight, be safe. Love, bro. Love. Aight Ma, love.” It’s like you just can’t say “I--LOVE--YOU.” It be like “Love,” or “love you” and things like that. “Imma talk to you.” That’s the way that I feel Black people replace they love, by saying “love you.” They just gotta call you every day, to see that you still talking and breathing, so they know you here. . . .

NAYA - GENUINE-SHIP VS FRIENDSHIP I’m friendless but I have a lot of genuine around me which become you guys, this is family, this is genuine, you know what I mean. But i don’t have like friendship. I have genuine-ship. And that’s all you need. That’s what you are supposed to get out of friends. Genuine. Friends become family.

48

NAYA - PERSONAL GROWTH AND FRIENDSHIP I’m a Leo. Things get boring to me quick. Things get played out to me quick. I like to venture, see things, be all over. . . I like to do things. I can’t stay on the same path for so long and you got friends that we been clubbin sense we ain’t supposed to be clubbin that still clubbin now. So now when they hit me up about a club . . . It’s boring now. I ain’t tryin to do that now. . . That don’t excite me no more. . . . People grow different . . . We both growing. But we growing in different ways. . . .

49

LIVING LIES - NAYA PROTECT THE BABIES Protecting the community.

With a shell that really protecting themselves.

Using us the people to get back at the people.

Help is on the way Help is on the way Help was on the way

Protect the babies Don’t’ baby the grown people Guide us to the ocean Rainbow beach is missing Yellow, orange, green, purple, etc colors So why would I go there ever in life

Martine Luther King street Is named after a dream But nothing come to a dream but a sleeper 50

HEY LORI - NAYA A MESSAGE TO LORI LIGHTFOOT I was so proud and happy to know a Black, beautiful woman was going to protect us.

Until it was your time to bat. Strike 1, then I said come on come on. Strike 2, Strike 3, was when you faked us all out.

We thought you was for the people. You had points to prove to the people you grew up with. Not the people that’s growing up, the babies who need you.

I need you, but you failed us. Sometimes when I watch you on the News, I put my head down, but I notice you always talk down when you talking to us. You read to us not speak to us.

Thank you for trying tho. Trying is a lot of power. You bold disrespectful. We don’t feel you, not you.

51

CIRCLE OF ROSES - CASARAH

I am sexy, sassy, Scorpio obsessed with becoming a success, saved, set, secure woman.

CIRCLE OF ROSES - DYESHA

I am the best sign, Libra. I am a college student, trying to get her business international.

DYESHA - FAMILY IS COMPLICATED REFLECTIONS FROM THE SOUTH CAROLINA RETREAT

“Family - Ever since I could remember my father was never really in m like in my life. But my brother on the other side didn’t get that same love growing up. So that always made me feel abandoned and left out. Don’t get me wrong, I visit and saw him at some birthdays and 1 graduation out of 4. It wasn’t the same love my brother was receiving. I feel like he showed him and gave hime more attention than the other kids (daughter) because he’s the only boy.”

54

CIRCLE OF ROSES - PISCES

My name is Pisces and I am a Gemini. My emotions be all over and I didn’t really care too much for others until this group of amazing women.

CIRCLE OF ROSES - RASHENIECE

I am an aspiring mother of five, who is dedicated to becoming a mother to all.

CIRCLE OF ROSES - TONI

My name is Toni. I am a nice, sweet, uplifting person. I love helping others.

CIRCLE OF ROSES - CIARRA

I am a Virgo from Roseland

CIRCLE OF ROSES - TAKHARI

I'm a 23-year-old from the Wild Wild 100's, blossoming into a woman while facing adversity.

TAKHARI - SCATTERED REFLECTIONS FROM THE SOUTH CAROLINA RETREAT

When I blank out I had just had a flashback. When I get very quiet I’m having a silent anxiety attack and don’t want anyone to know or notice. When I sleep in my bed all day depression is taking over. When I appeared to be smiling I had just cried in the car from the mental anguish...

when I appeared to have it all together I had just felt weak and was unsure how to start my day... while others talked about me and thought they knew my story I was humble and remained quiet and let them tell it wrong ... what was thought to break me really made me stronger when I thought I was going broke money still flourished around.. in my darkest shadow I still see a small light dimming over me. My puzzle pieces are still scattered all over but I’m going to continue to piece it together one by one until they're all back together.

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KHALIAH

"Sometimes you have to

open your heart, just like a book."

PEACE

LOVE FOR OTHERS

SELF LOVE

MONEY

"I MUST BE THE BRIDGE TO NOWHERE BUT MY TRUE SELF AND THEN I WILL BE USEFUL..."

DONNA KATE RUSHIN

CHICAGO ORGANIZATIONS DEDICATED TO EMPOWERING UNRESOURCED COMMUNITIES WRITTEN BY DR. MOORE, PHD - CONTEXTOS CHI

Chicago CRED (Create Real Economic Destiny)

opened its women’s center in 2021. Housed at the

Missing Peace Church of Living Hope Chicago 212

East 95th Street in the historic Roseland/Rosemoor

neighborhoods, the center resides in an old church

complete with a rainbow of stained glass throughout

that adds a vibrant burst of light to the space. Led by

Necole Muhammad and a team of life coaches and

support staff, the center has quickly become a vital

cog in the community.

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CIRCLE OF ROSES REFLECTIONS

LISA KENNER

THE BUTTERFLY HEALER - CHANGE AGENT

Lisa Kenner is a seasoned leader who has dedicated her career to providing transformational

educational opportunities to children, families, and communities. Operating with a collaborative

mindset and with vision and passion, Lisa founded and led a successful single-site charter school

for 12 years in North Lawndale. She thrives in community-based work, and has earned the trust

and respect of students, families, staff, funders, board members and community stakeholders

REFLECTIONS ON OUR JOURNEY AUTHORS CIRCLE WRITTEN BY LISA KENNER - CONTEXTOS CHI Each time we connect, be it online or in person, we move from greetings to ideas to story seeds, from connections to reflections on life: truths, hurt, possibilities, conundrums, invitations. As humans have done for thousands of years, we see and hear each other, and share our own stories. Each complex individual enters wearing layers, and the process of co-creating Authors Circle space allows one the opportunity to peel back, exposing unfinished business, mining for hearts of the matter.

Authors Circle Values, Greetings, Story Seed Drafts, Sharing and Feedback guide us. In Circle of Roses, Ms. Muhammad, Bri, and the team as co-pilots as dr. moore, Naimah, and I seek to travel further. Deeper in the journey of seeking our own personal unfinished business, transformative experiences, and embedded wisdom, power. We wrote, reflected, and connected with our urgency as women...then shared with the world as another act of courage, sharing our own stories, real stories not what we often tell, let alone reveal. In Authors Circle we

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share stories first for ourselves, then in service of the world’s becoming.

The Circle of Roses included a powerful new dimension--collaboration with Naimah Thomas and the opportunity to engage in art therapy and publish a book!

Reflecting, honoring, connecting, healing, and imagining in the visual arts. I remember the first art therapy session vividly. Tables spaced apart, bursting with art supplies for each author, each woman, each participant. Nervously, excitedly we jumped in.

Naimah swept blue then purple across the canvas in the church on 95th street in Roseland. She told us that our focus is on the process, not the product. I watched, entranced by the calm, the cool, the power in her brushstrokes in this healing space. Learning we didn’t need to draw a discernible image in order to create art, each of us eventually dared to jump in and flow that Monday morning in Circle. This was the first step into the art therapy sessions with Naimah, part of the Circle of Roses Authors ' journey of healing, growing, and becoming.

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After each art therapy session, Naimah encouraged all of us to bring these art kits home with us so that we could process and create whenever we chose to do so. Eventually, I did. Late one night I continued opening, exploring the beautiful array of new supplies--paints, canvases, pencils, brushes of all sizes, tote, images, all magic tools. Soon confronted simple, jarring questions deeper than the task at hand. Was it OK to open these beautiful, new products? What actually to do with them? Make something or simply make? Was I worthy of these treasures?

Then I returned to the shared space of Circle, replayed Naimah’s words, saw her painting blue brush strokes across the canvas, guiding what we did--what many of us thought we couldn’t do. One difficult evening I took the risk and reached for the paint, pouring it out upon the pristine palette, and began brushing the blues, purple, silver. It felt so good, so new, so empowering. Canvases, bottles, boxes now painted in blue and flowers and kaleidoscope patterns. It still feels good to create. To break the bottle’s seal, pour the paint, trust the process. The journey in Authors Circle is one that stays with each of us even outside of the physical space. We bring elements into our daily life. This is the power of Circle.

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These healing art therapy sessions facilitated by Naimah began 7 weeks after the Circle of Roses had first met, connecting online in ConTextos Authors CyberCircle. The Circle of Roses journey is powerful, iterative, unique among Authors Circles especially for the pivots, bends, and turns as together we flowed, navigated, responded, and reflected life in Chicago in real time in 2020-2021.

The context of collective and individual truths--predictable and unknown--the fabric of life.

Circle of Roses has been a robust iterative journey. From CyberCircles to 95th street In-Person Circle to nourishing meals to sharing stories to making art to podcasts to the Cyber Circle Retreat Authors Circle in South Carolina to now.

Powerful women unveiling, revealing stories of creation, elation, destruction, insight, and power.

Led by the hearts, minds, wisdom of Authors Kaitlin, Naya, Kailin, CaSarah joining with life coaches, life guides, community leaders Mrs. Necole Muhammad, Dr. Phyllis West, Ms. Bri, Ms. McCoy, Mr. Craig Nash, others from Chicago. Travel to South Carolina for transformational connections in history, truths, and legacies,

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then soon to other parts of the world. Deep roots, strong wings flexing in the continuing journey of African American women’s experiences in complex contexts of searing truths. Be brave. Be candid. Embrace your truth. Embrace your growth.

These Author Circles Values guide us forward...in circle and beyond. May we continue to move in purpose, on purpose. May we continue to see each other, listen to each other, show up for each other and ourselves in authentic ways. May we continue to be fully fabulous, flawed, and powerful beyond measure. The world in 2021 and beyond needs and deserves nothing less. Bless!

PURPLE HEARTS

STAR BLUE

PAINTINGS BY LISA KENNER, 2021

RAINBOW BEADS PAINTING BY LISA KENNER, 2021

MAGIC POPPY PAINTING BY LISA KENNER, 2021

VIOLET FLOWERS PAINTING BY LISA KENNER, 2021

DR. MOORE

SIX WORD MEMOIR GRANDMASTER

dr. moore with over twelve years of teaching at the university and college level, decided to take

her passion for working with students, instruction, curriculum design, and disrupting inequity to the

secondary education and non-for-profit sectors.

REFLECTIONS ON ART I CREATED IN AUTHORS CIRCLE WRITTEN BY DR. MOORE - CONTEXTOS CHI Mother/daughter relationships are invariably complicated. Perhaps it is being the only product of such an intense and intimate connection who can replicate that ultimate creation that drives the emotion. Perhaps it is the seeing of oneself in a kind of funhouse mirror way that at once heartens and frightens at the same time. Perhaps it is the simple act of walking along the path that one’s mother, and one’s mother’s mother, and one’s mother’s mother’s mother has trod down through the traced and untraceable lineage that is daunting. Perhaps all daughters try at some point to walk a road less traveled only to find themselves meeting that other familiar trail. I am no different as a daughter.

My mother is no different either. So when I had the opportunity to co-facilitate and co-create a space, a circle, an Authors Circle to be exact, for women, specifically Black women, my heart was filled. Being guided by Naimah Thomas through art therapy allowed that fullness to be expressed in paint and canvas, in images and glue.

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My mom is at the center of our family and our home and her presence colors everything, hence the colorful canvas rimmed in Black. The piece consists of images of my mother as a young woman coming into her own, as a young mother, and then later as a grown a** woman taking care of all she had to bear. I haven’t always known, or perhaps more accurately, I have not always wanted to acknowledge, that I am literally here because she exists and I am the person I am because she helped make me so, good and bad. Finally, it is my hope that the love and respect I hold for her is as present on the canvas as it is in my heart.

UNTITLED PHOTO COLLAGE BY DR. MOORE, 2021

NECOLE K. MUHAMMAD, LCSW THE URBAN SOCIAL WORKER

Necole K. Muhammad is a multi-passionate Licensed Clinical Social Worker, Speaker, Author, Life

Coach, Certified Yoga Teacher. Necole K. Muhammad has over 25 years of experience leading,

consulting, and working with individuals and groups involved in the justice and educational

systems, community intervention/outreach, individual and couple counseling/coaching.

THE CIRCLE OF ROSES WOMEN WORDS FROM NECOLE MUHAMMAD ON WHY AND HOW SHE SELECTED EACH ROSE FOR THE CIRCLE

I wanted the women to be in a better position to share their stories, to work

together, and ultimately commit to the process of healing alongside one another.

The Circle of Roses was created as an opportunity for the women to be authentic,

take responsibility, and engage in self-preservation as they strive to live and love

themselves. They all have a desire to author their own stories, connect with other

women dealing with similar issues, and encourage them to lead lives that are

whole and full. Every single time the women made space for themselves to show

up to circle whether virtual or in person, they gave themselves permission to be in

a non-judgmental space.

Flexibility, especially during such difficult moments was

so instrumental in their healing process.

Each woman who showed up is dealing with so many obstacles in their lives.

Navigating a literal and active war in their communities, their environments, their

city,

and

within

themselves.

Circle

of

roses

was

a

collaborative

space

that

encouraged each individual to show up as they are, have an opportunity to be

seen,

heard,

acknowledged,

and

most

importantly

affirmed.

Having

real

conversations about their stories allowed time to reflect, celebrate, To look at

challenges,

different

perspectives,

and

realize

they

are

not

alone

in

life.

Sometimes they thought they didn’t really have unconditional support or no space

to share their individual journeys.

Black Women CAN DO ANYTHING. WE HAVE PROVEN THAT TIME AND TIME AND TIME AGAIN

- TARANA BURKE 81

BRIANNA CAIN POET & HEALER

Bri Cain is a literary artist, who writes poetry and performs. Bri has performed as a featured artist for

various events in Chicago since 2017 and her voice has also reached Dallas, New York City and Los

Angeles. She was selected as a fellow for an international artist residency in Champagne-Ardenne, France

in May 2021. Bri writes poems and short anecdotes, primarily centered on situations she has overcome

earlier in her life and as a young woman that she can share to help other women. She is a fervent believer

that there is healing in transparency!

BRI- MINIMUM SENTENCE OF FIVE YEARS IN NODUS TOLLENS

I imagine color fades as life exits your body.

Perhaps, seeing in color is a gift reserved for the living.

Embers dance is my sclerae.

Tears scorch down my flushed red cheeks.

There are steel bars that only I can see and a low ceiling that guffaws at my attempts of forward movement.

There is no moving forward.

I intermittently switch between supine, prone and fetal for days, uninterrupted.

Nothing is waiting for me.

No one is searching for me.

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BRI- MINIMUM SENTENCE OF FIVE YEARS IN NODUS TOLLENS

The sound of silence is obnoxious and heavy. It hurts so much that I pretend to relish in its submergence. I know I cannot save myself from drowning

From the dictionary of obscure sorrow, I am certain that the only thing I am certain about is that my life would be defined as a conundrum itself.

What the hell am I doing here as if I serve a purpose as grand as water?

As if I serve a purpose.

I imagine color fades as life exits your body.

I return to the same position in which I entered this world.

I close my eyes once more and wait.

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BRI- SOMEDAY, YOUR SOMEDAY WILL ARRIVE

Woman, rest assured that God counts your tears.

He holds them in His hands and gently sprinkles them down, so you can be greeted with flowers.

He left them here for you… to see yourself the way He views you when mirrors distort your image.

A beautiful life came from dirt.

You’ve been planted— that explains all the shit you’ve been through.

The darkness is temporary.

You’re growing and you don’t even know it.

If only you could look beyond what is and see what will be.

The beauty you hold, the love you give will be returned to you abundantly.

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BRI- UNTITLED If someone told me that my pain would be great enough to heal someone else’s, I don’t know if I would have the courage, the sanity, or the sanctuary to build someone else’s. Could I really bury my fears to help kill someone else’s? Could I selflessly pour from my cup, even though it’s broken, and maybe fill someone else’s? How could I set myself apart and lay my life down when it feels like no one else is because it feels like this burden is mine, this grief has my name on it and no one else’s.

This is how it feels to be Black in America.

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THE CIRCLE OF ROSES WOMEN REFLECTIONS FROM BRI CAIN ON BEING AN INTEGRAL PART OF THE CIRCLE OF ROSES AND THE MEANINGFUL TIME SPENT IN SOUTH CAROLINA.

My experience with the Circle of Roses is beyond what I could have predicted.

In a short amount of time, we’ve shared stories and wiped each other’s tears. Just when I thought our hearts couldn’t be any more connected, our trip to South Carolina proved me wrong. This group of women speak with such conviction and courage each time we’re together, but in South Carolina, souls were uncovered.

They speak and I listen attentively in pure awe. The more time we spend together, I feel myself absorbing their qualities that I admire so much. I’m a little braver, my voice is a little bigger and my support system has expanded exponentially. Being in community with these remarkable women has substantially contributed to my personal healing journey and I am forever grateful.

A ROSE IS STILL A ROSE WOMEN'S EMPOWERMENT SPOTIFY PLAYLIST HTTPS://SPOTI.FI/3FMFFAM

Aretha Franklin - A Rose Is Still a Rose Chaka Khan - I'm Every Woman Solange - Cranes in the Sky Mary J. Blige - Be Happy Jamila Woods - Blk Girl Soldier Teyana Taylor - Gonna Love Me. Lonely M Sounds Of Blackness - Optimistic Beyoncé - Before I Let Go - Homecoming Live Bonus Track TimaLikesMusic - Black Joy Chloe x Halle - Do It Avery*Sunshine - Blessin Me Jamila Woods - Holy Andra Day - Tigress & Tweed (Music from the Motion Picture "The United States vs.

Billie Holiday") Avery*Sunshine - Safe In His Arms Jazzyfatnastees - Unconventional Ways Amel Larrieux - Afraid and more...

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ROSES OF CHICAGO CRED PHOTO COLLAGE BY CRAIG NASH, 2021

SISTER'S KEEPER SOUTH CAROLINA, 2021

A SPECIAL THANKS TO

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CIRCLE OF ROSES