Jesus Martinez
The Journey of My Life
The ConTextos Authors Circle was developed in collaboration with young people who are at risk of, victims of or perpetrators of violence in El Salvador. In 2017, this innovative program expanded into Chicago to create tangible, high-quality opportunities that nourish the minds, expand the voices and share the personal truths of individuals who have long been underserved and underestimated. Through the process of drafting, revising and publishing memoirs, participants develop self-reflection, critical thinking, camaraderie and positive selfprojection to author new life narratives. Since January 2017, ConTextos has collaborated with the Cook County Sheriff's Office to implement Authors Circle in Division X of Cook County Department of Corrections as part of a vision for reform that recognizes the value of mental health, rehabilitation and reflection. These powerful memoirs complicate the narrative about violence and peace-building, and help author a hopeful future for these men, their families, and our collective communities. While each memoir's text is solely the work of the Author, the images used to create this book's illustrations have been sourced from various print publications. Authors curate these images and then, using only their hands, manipulate the images through tearing, folding, layering, and careful positioning. By applying these collage techniques, Authors transform their written memoirs into fully illustrated books. In collaboration with
The Journey of My Life Jesus Martinez
My childhood was I can say good, beautiful, full of fun, with my friends, cousins,
and neighborhoods. In my school the teachers all from 1st to 6th grade, they
gave me the diploma for best student of my class. In the ceremony of closure, the
director was calling by microphone to the best students. I’m always with my friends.
When he calls my name, like every year, my mom finding the photographer to take
the photo with the teacher. My Mom was always there because she was proud of
me for being a good student.
My Father, I don’t remember, or probably he never went to see me grab my diploma, but
I understood he was working all the time but he can take some free time to see his son.
This is why I looked at my father with so much respect, but I never spoke with him about
father and son.
Anyways, in my house was the typical family. The father working, the mother in charge
of the kids and doing the house chores. My Mother always I remember in the kitchen.
My Mom’s kitchen was small with a stove, table on the side, a sink that’s old as hell, and
another table to eat with a radio on the table. I’m talking about 1989.
I never felt poor because all was harmonious in my neighborhood. My Parents never
taught me, or basically was prohibited from saying bad words at home. But I can
be honest I felt sad when my father drank too much on weekends, or including on
weekdays. I can’t hide this part of my life because he argued with my mom on those
days, but my father was a good construction worker.
In the morning vacations of school Monday thru Friday. I was in charge of taking the
lunch to my father on my bicycle. My Bicycle was black, and my friends nicknamed it
“Titanic” to my bicycle. Believe it or not the bicycle broke into pieces when my brother
was riding, and when he went straight to the ground, I was happy because I was
like,”Time for a new one.”
I had a lot of friends, but only I had one that was like my brother. Always together in the
kindergarten school because he and his brother was living far away from my town. They
were going to my town just for school, then years later all I knew about my best friend
was he got married and had 3 daughters, and then I hear he is having problems with his
wife. They divorced, and I think he can’t handle “Soliciting” himself. My other friend called
me, nickname “Pin”, and he told me ,”Ismael, died.” I was thinking,”Why? Why to take
that decision. He was a good son, good father, and good friend. Rest In Peace.
On my way to the U.S. I was on vacation from work because the walnuts from the worth of Mexico are in
season, so July-August was vacations. When I was with my cousin one time talking with
him, he told me,”You don’t want to go to El Gabacho or U.S. He made me think about
it, and the same month, I heard a group of people going to make the trip to the north,
and I took the chance.
her and my cousins, then I went to I remember, I went to my Aunt's house to dismiss with prayed for me, my mom was crying my Grandma's house. She told me a lot advice. She ed to the bus stop to take the trip, with my grandma because I was very young, and I walk but I didn’t know my cousin from my mother's family.
He was going too, so I met him at the bus stop. He told me Chuyito is like little Chuy because my father was Chuy also. When he asked me,”You have an I.D. with you?” I said,”No.” But my Father was in the corner of the street watching me take the bus, and that was the last time that I saw my father.
On my way to my journey of life then, I took the bus. It was like 11:00 pm on wednesday,
and I was thinking about a lot of things to recognize about the weeks, months, and years.
The next morning, we arrive to the border of Nogales, Coauila. When we walking we
came down off the bus. Many people ask you,”You going to cross? You going to cross?
I have for cheap.” That is a bad signal of something going to happen. Nobody do things
for cheap. “You're going to cross. I take you for cheap.” So we have to be alert because
the cartel is around the border, hiring or stealing people.
Most of them are from Central America, stolen at the border. It’s like the land of nobody. No law, no
police, just you. We took a car that was waiting for us. We arrived to a big house in construction on
the same street. There was a small store, “Tiendita.” We did a purchase of basic things like water,
whey tylenol, canned food, and tissue paper, then returned to the place. We eat, just ready to walk a
lot the next day.
The Next day at 7 am, we was walking by the train tracks, walking with no looking
back. Just walking with my backpack and jacket. I remember it was blue, black, and
white North Carolina panthers. It was like 12:00 noon, walking already by the real
desert.
We hear trucks by the road, it was The Border Patrol, or “La Migra”. After that, they
moved away, and we started running with no stop finding a big tree. The guide was a 14
years old boy, a local from the border. We didn’t know if he knew the way in the desert.
After we ran, we started to see the only big tree in the middle of the desert.
The Rule was creepy, consist in: If someone running fall down, nobody is going to stop
and help you, you have to stand up, or it is the end for you until you find a border patrol
truck. We rested the day under the tree, we saw pass the helicopter from Border Patrol,
or “Mosco,” so the kid told us,”
The time to continue was 7 pm, it was a change of shifts at 7pm.” In The Desert it is different.
No noise, no lights, just you can hear the wind cold, and more cold with the past of the hours.
Sometimes walking, sometimes running. When I was running I didn’t see a big snake, and
the others jumping that part and walking around close to the snake bite, close to dying in the
desert.
Finally, we found an expressway. The key was just to cross the tree’s and wait, so we
did. We crossed and then, we went close to the expressway. A little farm with animals,
with no water with us. We ask for water, and he told us,”Over there by the bricks is the
hose wrapped.” We drank water like never before, and then we went to sleep and a
place for the animals.
The temperature gone down in minutes, real dry cold night. I wore my jacket and sweater. I felt
good for the rest of the night, but one of us was wearing a vest, no t-shirt, nothing. Just the vest.
I looked at him and he was shaking from the extreme cold, so I took my sweater and gave it to
him. He wears the sweater, and he can finally be able to sleep.
Next morning, some people in 3 trucks, and one car arrived with us. Bringing bags of
burgers from Burger King. After we eat, we load up the trucks and cars. The Person told
me,”You go in the car, and 2 women, one in front, me left side in the back, and the other
women on the floor in the car like laid down because her hair was like crazy. We travel 6
hours.
Finally, we was in Phoenix, Arizona. It was like 6:00, and we went to eat at a buffet. I think
it was Chinese, and I told my cousin,”Hey I want more soda.” And he told me,”Go with
that person and tell’em “More.” When I went to say that word, he looked at me, but didn’t
say anything. After we return to the house the next day, someone travel to Arkansas from
Arizona for us. My Cousin and two other people were going to Chicago. The rest of the
people, one went to Las Vegas, and I don’t know the others. Finally in Chicago, after
traveling for many things, I went to my first job in Chicago.
In my growth, the relationship with my brothers and sisters was ok, but with my big sister was, is, and will be unconditional. I think because we are almost the same age. She is my big support, emotional like I’m her support emotional too, we always talk about it.
Since a child, when I was like 8 or 9 years old I started to work with my Grandfather Luis. I started cleaning bricks and stacking them to be burned, and then sold. All this work I did after school. I went to work with my father. I remember my first full week pay.
I was so happy, and proud of myself because I had money so young, and the other kids were asking for money from their fathers but when I turned 15 years old, I had an opportunity to work full time with the neighborhood people. In a company of
walnuts processing, and cleaning, so I took the job, but I didn't return to the school or “prepatoria.” 3 years more for my graduation, and then the university, but that didn’t happen.
Now at my full time work I learned a lot and I also met a girl. Everything was so comfortable
in my work, working with my neighbors because my work was 3, or 4 houses away from
my house, so I grew up more, and I had the opportunity to come to the U.S. or basically Chicago .
I left my job, I felt sad, but I learned to live alone with no parents, so for me it was a big
change just because I was seeing my family everyday. Next day or weeks later, no more.
Just by telephone.
My cousin took me to my first job downtown. I started as a dishwasher for 3 months, then the chef gave me the chance to work as a prep cook. I took the position. It was
good for me because I started learning about the world of cooking, techniques, methods, and sizzles of food. I learned to do a lot of things, but step by step.
jobs. Never completed days off, just half The time was passing by working a lot at 2 to do a B.B.Q in front of the lake, but all I days. My Cousins was calling me sometimes I started bleeding from the nose when I wanted to do was eat something and rest, then was sleeping.
Every night I was bleeding, I went to the doctor. He told me, after many examimes of blood,
and things like that. He said,”You need to rest more.” Because my body was overworking,
and eating on certain times.”If you continue like that, you will be at serious risk of being
sick. That made me think about it.
In reality, I was working so much per week, and I was sending money to my family in Mexico. After that, I decided to leave my first job, so I started working at my second
job. After a week of working in a single work job, my cousin told me about one opening position, but in this work I learned to do inventory, orders, schedules, control of food and loss, training people, and making specials, or dishes, but I missed my first job.
I missed being part of a big company, working for cadillac palace theater hotel and
restaurant. I miss seeing the so many buses on Broadway, looking at the people walking
and passing the hotel, while we working. They was seeing us on how to create a dish, but always in my job, I was working so hard with all my heart.
I continued working hard. After One year later, for this time, I was working as a kitchen manager. I was a motivated person.
Years passing, my life was how can I say normal, but when I met some people it
changed. They were drinking on any day, and I started drinking on any day. Usually, I
was drinking 1 time a month, but no, we are close friends. I lost my focus of my family in Mexico and then, what happened, I quit from my work. I had good work, but I was with the wrong people. Now I’m in jail waiting for my future to continue. My Journey of my life…..
One thing I can say, I understand more clearly is the word of God in the bible. Why do I
have to be in jail to open the bible. For me to read the bible.. Why I never open the Bible being in the world? But I believe in God. I believe in Jesus. That is all I need in this life.
Philippians 4:12-13
I want to say thank you to my teachers, Johnny and Lisa for all of their support to do
this. To my kids that I love so much, my wife and my mother.
To my teachers Johnny and Lisa
I Am From Poem Jesus Martinez I am from the real 8os From cassettes and VHS Movies I am from the original and then classic or retro, now nostalgic I am from one of the best generations, where the music starts playing forever I’m from the Sunday was for church and visiting Grandma From Angel and Adam I’m from the every family cook something and to take to a picnic with the whole family Aunts, Uncles, Nephews, Nieces everybody mainly grandma and grandpa I’m from a small town but big in catholic faith. Carnitas and Enchiladas From the you go to the store very young alone, buy your things and go back to normal or play street fighter in the store with your friends.
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