Prevailed

Prevailed

T’Y Washington

“Until the lion writes his own story, the tale of the hunt will always glorify the hunter.”

-African proverb The ConTextos Authors Circle was developed in collaboration with young people at-risk of, victims of or perpetrators of violence in El Salvador. In 2017, this innovative program expanded into Chicago to create tangible, high quality opportunities that nourish the minds, expand the voices and share the personal truths of individuals who have long been underserved and underestimated. Through the process of drafting, revising, illustrating and publishing memoirs, participants develop self-reflection, critical thinking, camaraderie, and positive self-projection to author new life narratives.

Since January 2017, ConTextos has collaborated with the Cook County Sheriff ’s Office to implement Authors Circle in Division X of Cook County Department of Corrections as part of a vision for reform that recognizes the value of mental health, rehabilitation and reflection. These powerful memoirs complicate the narrative about violence and peace-building, and help author a hopeful future for these young men, their families and our collective communities.

In collaboration with

Prevailed T’Y Washington

This shit all happened when one day I came home from school, a hard day of classwork, homework on a little mix of headache. The trip home was decent. Nice weather. Sun out. I could hear the ice cream truck in the distance. Kids laughing and running to spend their money.

I arrive at home to the same pothole in the street. A yellow house that would remind many folks of a fruit.

This wasn’t a normal day when I would come home to hugs and kisses. I closed the door behind me and locked it. Something Momma would yell about if I didn’t do.

My OG wasn’t home. It was no sign or trace off her.

I was thinking she is hiding from me and I was to seek. I searched the house looking for Momma Dukes like I had a warrant, but I only found Pops. I ask Pops where OG was. He tell me she’s gone.

She’ll be back soon, son.

How soon, though?

Even with OG not being home Pops wasn’t happy.

I was home not happy at all.

I was just guessing on Momma Dukes whereabouts. Where did OG go? The mall, the store, maybe the library? Shit, I didn’t know.

Pops was attending to his daily program on TV and I was headed to bed. I needed a nap.

My head was killing me, still thinking OG would be back.

I was awake to a loud “Boom! Boom! Boom!” What the hell is that? I make my way out of bed.

I run down 15 stairs to realize it’s somebody at the doom knocking and kicking “Hey Auntie!”

“Hey boy, go pack your things. You coming to live with me. “

I knew shit had hit the fan then. Pops walked right in on time, “Fuck you mean he coming to live with you?� Cursing her out with the remote in his hand.

My father hated the look and smell, even the thought of his sister in law. Now this bulshit.

Pops could not do much but yell because auntie was handing over some papers. Later on he stated that OG had given her custody of me.

“When the fuck did this happen?!� Pops yelled. But it was true.

OG had left to make herself a better mother for me. Pops took the hit harder than I did. I love my Daddy and our bond, but I only wanted to know when my OG would be back.

It’s 6am and I’m up at this hour daily to walk the dog and get ready for school. I have made it routine now since I been living in hell. I caught my cousin Aisa right after, on the bus stop.

“See you at home, love you!”

“You too, cuzo!

Aisa was up around this time to catch first period bus. Me and her was in the same boat living with the devil until our mothers returned home. Living in this place was a bitch!

I hated not being loved.

Auntie told me, “I don’t owe you shit.

Tell your mother to love you.

I’m just giving you a place to stay.”

The anger of not being listened to.

“I want to go to the movies.”

“I hear you, but I don’t care,” she would say.

I couldn’t do this. No homies over, just stupid shit. I get locked in a room with my cousin for a petty as reason, cause the teacher called three times in less than a week about my behavior.

It’s summertime and hot out. We are in a room with what feels like my freedom taken away.

Not eating what I want. Having to steal food. WTF

Some days was better than others. If I wasn’t in my room, I was in Aisa’s room. I let cuzzo see my phone and use it. She would bring me food after she cleaned the kitchen.

I remember one time getting my ass beat because I was in cuzzo’s room, because I wasn’t supposed to be. But me, being me, ended up back in there after she left.

I still had moments when I wanted Momma Duke to come sooner.

I missed her.

Being so far away from Pops. I didn’t see him.

My sister came every once in a while to see me.

Years went on, shit got hard. I was in high school now.

Shit didn’t change much like housework and living in hell. With me being older, thinking differently, I refused to stay in the room like a child.

I remember one day my auntie saying “Go to your fucking room and stay!”

I told her, “You got me fucked up if you thinking I’m going to stay in a room, haha.”

We got into it about that, cause her words didn’t hold no power. The things she used to hit me with lost power, too. It got to the point auntie would use her fist with a ring on every finger.

Shit didn’t hurt, though. After that my cousin Aisa would always laugh about it and tell me, “you crazy just like the bitch, cuz.”

I had got wind from my sister that Momma was home and her first priority was to get her son.

I wanted to see her. How different Momma was after 4 years! I had seen pictures, but I wanted a face to face. First time me meeting OG was different. The sight of her was breathtaking.

She was happier, beautiful teeth and the white smile of a millionaire.

We always spent time together. She told me it was a matter of time before OG had everything ready for me to live with her. All OG needed was an apartment. After years of bullshit and stress and not knowing when I was going home...this was finally coming to an end.

Only issue was my auntie was so used to getting money for me. She wasn’t trying to give me up, because of the goofy ass $1700 check every month. Momma Duke didn’t give in so easy.

It got to the point where the issues had to be taken to court. Even though I was still living with my auntie. I could hear her talking about my OG. “Yo momma ain’t shit. She ain’t no fit parent.” I just didn’t pay her no attention and went to talk to my cousin Aisa.

I really didn’t feel the court thing. Always felt like I was getting convicted or something, just being there. The look of the room, just all eyes on you.

This court day was different. A blonde lady sat down with me in a room inside a room.

“Everything you say and anything you say will remain in this room.”

She asked me questions like do I think it’s safe with my OG and things like that.

Later on I was informed my mother was granted custody of me.

At that time I was overwhelmed. I prevailed from a situation that broke me to my lowest level.

Having these issues on the day to day, was now solved with faith, persistence and the love of my mother.

Now I look back and realize it was the best thing that ever happened to me.

T’Y The city of bucketboys From narcotics and conviction I am from the Hometown of Chicago Bears Potholes, section 8 ,chips and cheese I am from the hustle.

From nothing to something I’m from cookouts and passouts From Mitchell’s and Washington I’m from the family events and family fights From family first and God, too I’m from no education, no job I’m from Mercy Hospital Corn beef, ice cream sundaes From the best lady to live, Sweet Momma P.