Costa Link Compele Sept 09 by Costalink Magazine

Costa lInk ine

magazine

COVERING COSTA DEL SOL - INCLUDING FUENGIROLA, LA CALA, CALAHONDA, ELVIRIA, MARBELLA, PUERTO BANUS, SAN PEDRO, ESTEPONA, LA DUQUESA, SOTOGRANDE, ALHAURIN AND COÍN.

SEPTEMBER 2009 NO.30

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WWW.COSTALINKMAGAZINE.COM

Jokes

Local Info

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Puzzles

Bar & Restaurant Guide Kids Page What’s On Guide

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Business Directory

Glass Curtains S.L.

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MERCEDES 300SL 1994, 105,000kls, Alloy Wheels, Alarm, PAS, CD, E/L Roof .............. 6,995 €

RENAULT LAGUNA 2001, Spanish Reg, PAS, Hatch, AC, Alarm, CD, FSH, ITV till 2011..5.495 €

OPEL FRONTERA LHD, Spanish Reg, 3 Door, removable hard top, long ITV.................1,995 €

HONDA CRV 1998, PA, E/W, 5 Speed Man, C/L, tinted glass, 72 kls. LHD, UK Reg..4,995 €

MERCEDES 280 Auto, Sports Box, PAS, E/L, C/L, Long ITV, Classic Car, Spanish Reg.

MERCEDES 280 SLC COUPE. Auto, Sports Box, PAS, E/W, Remote Locking, Spanish Reg.

FIAT ULYSEE 2LT, JTD, diesel, PAS, A/C, 7 seats, 2000.

Selection of new pit bikes and quads from 350€

KIA SPORTAGE 1997, 5 Speed, 4WD, Alloy Wheels, PAS, CD, UK Reg.

VW GOLF CABRIOLET 1990, CD, E/W, Some Service History, Spanish Reg.

VW GOLF CABRIOLET Mk4, 1998, LHD, CD, E/W, FSH, UK Reg.

CHRYSLER NEON 1995, LHD, PAS, AC, CD, Recent Service, UK Reg.

CARS WANTED - CASH WAITING UK & SPANISH PLATES CALL: 661 964 014 email: alhaurinautos@live.co.uk

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With over 15 years experience in the UK, we at Alhaurin Autos know how to look after our customers. We will take part exchanges of either English or Spanish vehicles. We give you cash back if you wish to trade down to a smaller car. We have a fully qualified gestor and will take care of all the legalities for you. SUZUKI WIDE BOY 1992, RHD UK Reg, Alloy Can’t get to see us? No problem, we’ll bring the car to you. Wheels, Alarm, PAS, CD Servicing and repairs at competative prices ............................. 2.295 € 3, 6 and 12 month warranties available. Grua recovery and removal service available. FULLY LICENCED.

OPEL ZAFIRA 2000, Desiel, Silver, AC, 7 Seats, Alloy Wheels, PAS CD, FSH, UK Reg.

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MERCURY SABLE. 1991 LHD, Auto, PAS, C/L fully loaded, UK Reg.

ROVER 25 Auto, LHD, electric pack.

JAGUAR XJ8 LI 2000, PAS, auto, cream leather, heated seats, low milage, metallic green, FSH.

RENAULT MIEGANE CABRIOLET. 2001, UK Reg. Power Roof, AC, CD, Alloy Wheels, FSH.

Cars bought and sold, cash waiting, immediate decision. Free collection service, best prices paid, Call now! Sunday viewings by appointment.

www.alhaurin-autos.com

Rover MG ZR Coupe 2001, 20,000 kls, AC, PAS, MONDOEO GHIA Alloy Wheels, Alarm, CD, FSHITV till 2010... 3.495 € 2004, 6 Speed, Silver, Alloy Wheels, AC, PAS, CD, FSH, LHD.

From..................... 3,995 €

SMART CAR Choice of 2, both LHD

Email: alhaurinautos@live.co.uk Poligono Industrial La Rosa, Alhaurin el Grande

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RENAULT ESPACEL 2001, Alloy Wheels, Alarm, A/C, PAS, CD, FSH, ITV 2011. RHD .......... 6,495 €

KIA PICANTO 2006, 5 Door, AC, PAS, C/L, ABS, CD, Bluetooth, 20,000 kls ........... 5,995 €

UNDER NEW MANAGEMENT We have more stock available, please see our website for a wide selection of LHD, RHD, Commercial, 4x4 and Cabriolets.

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ALHAURIN AUTOS

sales@costalinkmagazine.com

Website: www.costalinkmagazine.com

Skype: costalink.magazine Deposito Legal: MA-228-2007 Deadline Date: 15th of each month.

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No part of this publication, including pictures may be copied, SCANNED, used or reproduced without our prior written consent.

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Email:

Well as we thought it’s been a very hot August with the air conditioning working overtime. September has arrived and hopefully along with it those cooler nights ‘we hope’. So welcome to the September edition of Costa Link Magazine. In this month’s issue, catch up on some of the gossip with the new X-factor. Look out for the ever so indulgent baked summer fruits dessert, and check out the ‘What’s On’ guide. It’s a busy month for entertainment, with the ‘Yankee Blues Brothers’ and ‘Michael Jackson Tributes’ on the Costa, and on the 25th there’s a local business ‘Showcase Exhibition and Raffle’ at Vista Del Mar, we will be there so come down and say ‘hello’, remember it’s all in the ‘What’s On’ page’s 40 & 46. Thanks for all the great emails and comments we have had about last month’s issue, we really pleased you all enjoyed it. Finally just to remind you it’s Halloween next month, and only four months counting September to Christmas, it will soon be here given how fast the rest of this year seems to have flown past. So a note to all our advertisers to start thinking about your Halloween and Christmas marketing, so give us a call or come down to the ‘Showcase’ to discuss it. Keep smiling and have a great month!

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Tel: 663 061 669

Costa Link Magazine accepts no responsibility for alterations to events listed, claims made by our advertisers or information provided by our contributors.

Inside This Month’s Issue

What’s On Guide

Puz zles

Jokes Page

Kids Page

40 & 46

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Bar & Restaurant Guide

Flaming Hot Offer

1/4 page adverts for just €35.00 a month when you book for 3 months or more. Tel: 663 061 669

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Men are like placemats...They only show up when there’s food on the table. ♀ Men are like mascara...They usually run at the first sign of emotion.♀ Men are like bike helmets...They are handy in an emergency, but otherwise they just look silly. ♀ Men are like government bonds...They take so long to mature. ♀ Men are like parking spots...The good ones are taken, and the rest are disabled. ♀ Men are like copiers...You need them for reproduction, but that’s about it. ♀ Men are like lava lamps...Fun to look at, but not very bright. ♀ Men are like bank accounts...Without a lot of money, they don’t generate much interest. ♀ Men are like high heels...They’re easy to walk on once you get the hang of it.

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Cold Shoulder for Kerry Katona - Kerry Katona has been sacked by Iceland following the latest drug revelations. Iceland made the decision after Kerry was secretly filmed snorting what was thought to be cocaine in her bathroom at home. The supermarket giant are terrified that the most recent scandal will discourage customers from shopping at their stores, so they’re given the 28 year-old the boot, meaning that she will be a whopping £250,000 worse off a year. Kerry is said to be inconsolable at losing the money-spinning deal after being the face of the chain of stores for four years. A source close to the star said, “This is an absolute body-blow.”

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Cleared of Touching A Truncheon - We’re equally and amused and annoyed by the news that former Big Brother star Carole Ann Vincent was yesterday cleared of, err, stealing a policeman’s truncheon. The 55 year-old was accused of nicking the stick at an anti-war demonstration that was held in London last year. The BB8 contestant denied the charge and was backed in her bid to be let off by Labour politician Tony Benn, who said yesterday: “It would have been a gross injustice if she had been sentenced.” While we’re very pleased that Carole was let off the ridiculous charge, surely the courts have far better things to do than spend fortunes taking cases like this to trial?

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Bookies back Cheryl on X Factor Cheryl Cole is being backed by the bookies to win The X Factor again this year. The Girls Aloud star, who was the victor last year when she mentored winner Alexandra Burke, is heading up the under 25 boys this year. Ladbroke’s make the 26 year-old 2/1 to win, while Simon Cowell is second favourite at 9/4. Dannii is in third position at 9/4, while Louis is in last place with 10/3. However, Cheryl has said she will ditched her nice girl image in a bid to get nasty for the new series of ‘X Factor’. The last series saw the Girls Aloud singer blub her away through many emotional moments on the hit ITV reality show.

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Jordan bans, er, Jordan Jordan has banned Peter Andre from calling her by her ‘stage’ name. Instead her estranged husband must refer to her as her real name, Katie Price, at all times. The 31 year-old made Pete take out any reference to Jordan in his documentary, Going It Alone, which aired on ITV2 on the 17th Sept because it might be deemed to be derogatory. Katie, who made her name as glamour model Jordan, also banned Pete from showing any footage of her son, Harvey, during the hour and a half programme, while an abusive phone conversation was also censored. The entire show had to be re-edited and a new voiceover recorded to fit in with Katie’s demands. Three words Katie/Jordan/whoever you are – get over yourself.

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Dear Walter

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depressed and worthless. I love him very much, but ever since I gave him the ultimatum he has become increasingly distant. I don’t feel I can get through to him anymore. Can you please help?... Sincerely, Mrs. Sheila Fox. Dear Sheila, A car stalling after being driven a short distance can be caused by a variety of faults with the engine. Start by checking that there is no debris in the fuel line. If it is clear, check the jubilee clips holding the vacuum pipes onto the inlet manifold. If none of these approaches solves the problem, it could be that the fuel pump itself is faulty, causing low delivery pressure to the carburetor float chamber. I hope this helps... Sincerely, Walter.

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Dear Walter, I hope you can help me here. The other day I set off for work leaving my husband in the house watching the TV as usual. I hadn’t gone more than a mile down the road when my engine conked out and the car shuddered to a halt. I walked back home to get my husband’s help. When I got home I couldn't believe my eyes. He was in the bedroom with a neighbour lady making passionate love to her. I am 32, my husband is 34 and we have been married for twelve years. When I confronted him, he broke down and admitted that he’d been having an affair for the past six months. I told him to stop or I would leave him. He was let go from his job six months ago and he says he has been feeling increasingly

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by simply lighting your next fag from the butt of your last one. 6. Old telephone directories make ideal personal address books, simply cross out the names and address of people you don’t know. 7. Save electricity by shortening the cables to all your household electric appliances. 8. Drivers, save money by putting much larger wheels on the back of your car. That way you will always be going downhill, thereby saving on fuel. 9. Save a fortune on laundry bills. Give your dirty shirts to Oxfam, they will wash and iron them and you can buy them back for fifty pence. 9. Old people, if you feel cold indoors this winter, simply pop outside for ten minutes without a coat, when you go back inside you will really feel the benefit.

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Are you feeling the effects of the financial crisis, follow our top tips...1. Do not waste money on expensive ipods. Simply think of your favourite tune and hum it. If you want to “switch tracks”, simply think of another song you like and hum that instead. 2. Do not waste money on expensive paper shredders to avoid having your identity stolen. Simply place a few dog turds in the bin bags along with your old bank statements. 3.Don’t buy expensive ‘ribbed’ condoms, just buy an ordinary one and slipa handful of frozen peas inside it before you put it on. 4. Save money on expensive personalised car number plates by simply changing your name to match your existing plate. - Mr. KVL 741Y. 5. Smokers, save on matches and lighters,

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Eddie’s Plea...

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started writing a third ticket for a tiny whole in the windscreen! This went on for about twenty minutes, and you can see the result in the picture.The more Eddie insulted him, the more tickets the traffic warden wrote out and slapped on the windscreen. Eddie did not care one bit. Eddie thought it funny because his car was safely parked on the top floor of the multi-story car park.

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Eddie went out to buy a paper, and he was only gone for about three minutes. When he came out of the shop, there was a traffic warden writing out a parking ticket. The car was on a double yellow lines. Eddie approached the warden and said smiling, “Give me a break, I was only away a minute.” The warden just carried on writing out the parking ticket and completely ignored Eddie’s plea. Eddie, rather angry at being so openly ignored, called the warden, ‘A goose-stepping Nazi.’ The warden glared at Eddie and started writing another parking ticket, this time for having a smooth tyre. Eddie called him an even ruder name. The traffic warden finished the second ticket and put it on the windscreen alongside the first. Then he

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Blondie?” She replied, "I thought while you were waiting for the flat tires, headlights and running boards, you might as well gas up!”.

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A blonde walks into a bank in London and asks to see the manager. She says she’s going to Hong Kong on business for two weeks and needs to borrow £5,000. The manager says the bank will need some kind of security for the loan, so the blonde hands over the keys to a new Ferrari. The car is parked on the street in front of the bank, she has the car registration and everything checks out. The bank agrees to accept the car as collateral for the loan. The manager and the tellers all enjoy a good laugh at the blonde for using a £200,000 Ferrari

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A trucker came into a truck stop cafe and placed his order. He said, “I want three flat tyres, a pair of headlights and pair of running boards.” The brand-new blonde waitress, not wanting to appear stupid, went to the kitchen and said to the cook, “This guy out there just ordered three flat tyres, a pair of headlights and a pair of running boards. What does he think this place is, an auto parts store?” “No,” the cook said. “Three flat tires mean three pancakes, a pair of headlights is two eggs sunny side up, and running boards are two slices of crisp bacon.” “Oh, OK!” said the blonde. She thought about it for a moment and then spooned up a bowl of beans and gave it to the customer. The trucker asked, “What are the beans for,

Continued page 23

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Virgin’s Space Plane

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date yet, so if you fancy it get your reservation in. But be warned he has already taken 300 reservations at €140,000 each, and is holding €28 million in deposits. Customers include scientist Stephen Hawking and “Superman Returns” director Bryan Singer, according to Virgin Galactic President Will Whitehorn.

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Billionaire Richard Branson gave us our first glimpse of the plane, which was made by Virgin Galactic as part of its effort to jump-start commercial space travel. Virgin Galactic’s plan calls for WhiteKnightTwo to lift SpaceShipTwo, a pressurized spacecraft, into the atmosphere from a base in New Mexico. When they reach 15,240 metres, the spaceship would detach and blast into space at four times the speed of sound. The six passengers would experience about five minutes of weightlessness and get a glimpse of Earth. The spaceship would glide back to Earth much like the space shuttle. Take-off to landing is expected to take about two and a half hours. Virgin Galactic doesn’t have a launch

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Blondes Get Even!

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The boss returned after lunch in a cool mood and he called the whole staff in to listen to a couple of jokes ,which he had picked up whilst down the pub. Everybody, but young blonde girl laughed uproariously. He turned to her and grumbled “What’s the matter?”, “Haven’t you got a sense of humor” she replied, “yes thank you, but I don’t have to laugh, because I’am leaving on Friday.”

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as collateral against a £5,000 loan. An employee of the bank then proceeds to drive the Ferrari into the bank’s underground garage and parks it there. Two weeks later, the blonde returns, repays the £5,000 and the interest, which comes to £17.41. The manager says, “Miss, we are very happy to have had your business, and this transaction has worked out very nicely, but we are a little puzzled. While you were away, we checked you out and found that you are a millionairess. What puzzles us is, why would you bother to borrow £5,000?” The blonde replies... “where else in central London can I park my car for two weeks for only £17.41 and expect it to be there when I return?”

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THINKING OF THROWING A PARTY? We all like a good party, whether your getting married, engaged, for a special birthday 50th, 21st, 18th, or you just fancy having a party. Whatever the occasion there is always so much to think about and organise to make everything run smoothly, and to avoid disappointment for that special person you are having the celebration for, your guests, and just as important ‘you’ as the host. You need the Wow! factor. Having been events manager at Marco Pierre Whites Titanic restaurant in Soho London, Karen Fairbanks or Boo as she likes to be called has set up her own Events and Promotions company Wow! here on the Costa del Sol. “I saw that there was a niche here for us not only to offer a great service as I am sure other events companies and party organisers on the coast are doing but to give people that personal touch that magical wow factor that others seem to lack!”, “People are special and individual and need to be treated as such no matter what the

occasion and no matter what the budget. What you get from me is a new best friend able to help with all aspects from initial concept to delivery and hosting of the event. I can dress up in full theme or just blend into the background!”. Boo’s partner Paul has set up Blazing Fire Sound and together they can provide the PA/sound system, DJ’s, artists, security and catering. Paul is a very charismatic, funny and entertaining individual and can also host the event. Blazing Fire is not your usual mobile disco set up, this is a specialist company that has knowledge and experience of all genres of music. Paul uses his lyrical ability to create rhymes either before the event or on the spot about the hosts and their guests. They do have a set themed parties one being a Tropical theme complete with Jamaican food, BBQ and Jerk Chicken, or they can create the whole thing from scratch to your exacting requirements. So if you need something extra special contact Boo on 622 221 930 or Paul on 622 222 768.

A M a n’s W o r l d

Sup

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wife is yelling at the front door, who do you let in first? The dog, of course. He’ll shut up once you let him in. What’s worse than a Male Chauvinist Pig? A woman who won’t do what she’s told. I married Miss Right. I just didn’t know her first name was Always. Scientists have discovered a food that diminishes a woman’s sex drive by 90%. It’s called a Wedding Cake. Why do men die before their wives? They want to. Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the street with a bald head and a beer gut, and still think they are sexy. In the beginning, God created the earth and rested. Then God created Man and rested. Then God created ‘Woman’. Since then, neither God nor Man has rested.

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How many men does it take to open a beer? None. It should be opened by the time she brings it. Why is a Laundrette a really bad place to pick up a woman? Because a woman who can’t even afford a washing machine will probably never be able to support you. Why do women have smaller feet than men? It’s one of those “evolutionary things” that allows them to stand closer to the kitchen sink. How do you know when a woman is about to say something smart? When she starts her sentence with “A man once told me...” How do you fix a woman’s watch? You don’t. There is a clock on the oven. Why do men break wind more than women? Because women can’t shut up long enough to build up the required pressure. If your dog is barking at the back door and your

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either have to fill out a Wells Fargo withdrawal slip or go back to the Bank of America. Feeling defeated, the man said he understood and left. The Wells Fargo teller promptly called the police, who arrested the man a few minutes later - still waiting in line at the Bank of America. A man walked into a 7-11, put a $20 bill on the counter and asked for change. When the assistant opened the cash drawer, the man pulled a gun and asked for all the cash in the register, which the assistant promptly provided. The man took the cash from the assistant and fled - leaving the $20 bill on the counter. The total amount of cash he got from the drawer? Fifteen dollars.

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Sharon Osbourne will not be returning to the show saying: “Sharon won’t be coming back. “Instead the idea at the moment is to bring in a younger, male judge,” the source apparently said. Meet Miss Coco, General Mills, Pussy Jones and Captain Fang The Daily Star has revealed that all four of the X-Factor judges use code names to book hotel rooms, in a bid to stop crazy fans tormenting them. Cheryl is known as Miss Coco after her favourite designer Coco Chanel, Simon is known as General Mills. To put a stop to all that

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Dannii Minogue to be replaced by a Young Man Many people have been speculating that this years X Factor series will be the last for Australian judge, Dannii Minogue and this week Heat magazine have reported that Simon Cowell is considering replacing her with a young male judge instead. “Dannii was brought in initially to be the younger counterpart to Sharon, but since Cheryl arrived, she has replaced Dannii in that role and become so much more popular. It’s doubtful Dannii will be here for the next series,” a source reportedly told Heat. The source added that

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Cheryl on £750,000, was said to be looking for a £250,000 pay rise putting them both on £1million. But insiders say only Cheryl, 25, will secure the huge pay increase. Dannii, 37, will be left on a lower salary. A source close to the negotiations revealed,“Cheryl remains the golden girl, the one they all want. That gives her huge leverage to make a lot of money from the X Factor. She’s already on more than Dannii, so getting £1million is’t such a huge leap. But Dannii isn’t in such a strong position. The pay leap is too big. She’ll get a pay rise, but it still won’t be in Cheryl’s league.” Dannii was said to be furious when she discovered the pay gulf.

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nonsense, they use fake names now. Dannii’s secret name is Pussy Jones and Louis calls himself Captain Fang after he splashed out thousands of pounds on teeth whitening treatments. A source said, “We’ve had occasions in the past where fans find out what hotel they’re at and call up asking to be put through to Simon or Cheryl and making a pest of themselves. “Some made naughty suggestive comments or thought they might be able to sway the judges ahead of their audition. Demand to be paid £1 million Dannii currently on £500,000 a series, asked for her pay to be doubled while

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We specialise in serving our customers the highest quality food, w service, large portions, good value and most i FROM SPRING OUR BEAUTIFUL GARDEN TERRACES ARE OPEN -

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Tapas

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Dibleys

Bar

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La Cala de Mijas, Opposite the church. Tel: 952 493 042

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Totally Refurbished and Outside Courtyard Tapas 12pm - 3pm & 6pm - 10pm English and Spanish mix Full menu available 6pm - 10pm Sunday - Sunday Roast only. 12pm - 10pm Beef/pork/lamb €8 Chicken €7

to go...

Sandwich Bar

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COMPLE

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TONY’S BAR

OPEN 7 DAYS 10AM TILL LATE LA CORTIJERA LA CALA MIJAS COSTA

The Sussex Bar

Spring Roll, Special Salad, Chicken and Sweetcorn/Tomato/Hot and Sour Soup or Spare Ribs.

MAIN COURSE

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Special House Fried Rice, Boiled Rice or Noodles with Soya Bean Sprouts or Chips

DESSERTS

Coffee, Tea, Ice Cream, Cream Caramel or Fruit Main restaurant serving usual delicacies 6pm - 12pm

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Food served 10am -10pm. Sunday Lunch 1pm - 9pm. Thursday quiz night, Friday darts league, Saturdays Karaoke. La Cortijera. La Cala.

Jardin Botanico, Local 16, La Cala de Mijas. Tel: 952 599 236. Mob: 685 578 743

Friendly Atmosphere, Family Bar, Children Welcome

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Thursday Night - Quiz Nights, Friday Night - Bingo Two large, sunny terraces. Pool Table Internet access All live sport shown. Happy Hour 5pm-7pm Monday - Friday Las Adelfas No.11 Urb. Los Claveles

Tel: 952 493 763

bars and restaurant guide

C/Torremolinos, La Cala. Tel: 618 181 507

SPECIAL LUNCHTIME MENU 12PM - 4PM STARTERS

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Fresh Baguettes, Paninis, Kebabs, Burgers, Pies and Pastries. Open Mon - Sat 11.00 - 16.00 and 18.00 - 22.00 Sun -11 - 16.

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CHI ESE RESTAURA T

Great places to eat and drink in La Cala

HONG KONG

Sandi

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Snack Attack Cafe - Bar

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Due to popular demand Snack Attack is now open on Sundays 10am - 4pm for Breakfast, Lunch and our popular ROAST DINNER 2 courses for only 10 €

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Everything available as take away for days out Why not take a baguette of your choice to the Local 26 Jardín Botánico, beach or airport? La Cala de Mijas NOW IN OUR 6 T H YEAR Tel: 952 493 184

On the Sunny Side of the Street

W h a t ’s O n Mondays

Tuesdays

Quiz Night - 10.00, Bunkers Bar Bistro, Miraflores Driving Range. Karaoke - Fools bar. El Zoco, Calahonda.

Wednesdays Quiz Night - Captains Bar, La Cala. Bingo & Quiz - 10pm Bunkers Bar Bistro, Miraflores Driving Range.

Thursdays

Fridays

Showcase - Local Business Exhibition 25th September 10 - 5, Vista del Mar. Karaoke - “Paul the Bear” Shenanigans, 9.30pm Riviera del Sol. Karaoke - Tony’s Bar, La Cortijera, La Cala. Bingo - Captains bar, La Cala. Darts League - Sussex Bar, La Cortijera, La Cala.

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Blues Brothers - Vista Del Mar, Thu 10th. Steak Night & live music. €21.95 Karl Knight Or Gary Young - Vista del Mar. Karaoke - 9pm, Charleys Bar, Riviera del Sol.

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Quiz and Bingo - Shenanigans, Riviera del Sol. Live Music - Bunkers Bar Bistro, Miraflores Driving Range.

Quiz Night - JJ’s Bar, Riviera del Sol. Sussex Bar, La Cala. Karaoke - Fools Bar, El Zoco, Calahonda. Karaoke - Sisters Bar, The Strip, Calahonda. Quiz - 80’s Quiz. Sisters Bar, The Strip, Calahonda. One Man Show - Karl Knight Thu 3rd & 17th, Vista Del Mar.

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“the heart and soul of the campo”

Text: 637 89 86 89 40

Continued on page 46

great places to eat, drink and be entertained.

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Your Entertainment Guide

ADVERTISE YOUR BAR OR RESTAURANT HERE Just

€20 a month

www.rincondeelpadrino.com

Telephone: 663 061 669

Riviera del Sol

Nemos Bar

Front line Fuengirola port. Open all day. 6 days a week. Pool table and Sky Sports.

Fuengirola

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Sit ‘n’ Go sports lounge broadcasting all the weekly action in comfortable, friendly surroundings. Open daily from 1pm until midnight. Wi-fi internet access. Frontline C.C.Calypso.

Calypso

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Sit ‘n’ Go

Tel: 952 932 519

41 & 42, 1ST FLOOR CENTRO COMMERCIAL LOS JARALES, CALAHONDA

Harrys Sports Bar

ADVERTISE YOUR BAR OR RESTAURANT HERE

Telephone: 663 061 669

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All live sports and premiere league football. Six TV’s and big screen. Full menu, Sunday roast and homemade tapas. Large sun terrace. Open 10amlate, seven days a week. Upstairs Los Jarales.

Calahonda

Sisters Bar

Friendly family bar with good food, tapas, live entertainment, karaoke and sports. Open seven days a week. The Strip, Calahonda Tel: 952 939 579

Just €35 a month

great places to eat and drink

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THURSDAY KARAOKE 8.30pm SATURDAYS CABARET 8.30pm

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Los Jarales

Play world famous Texas Holdʼem Poker. From beginners to pros, we have games to suit everyone

ADVERTISE YOUR BAR OR RESTAURANT HERE Just

Italian restaurant. Taste the genuine Italian food in attractive decor. Open seven days a week, 1pm till late. C.C. El Zoco, first floor, Sitio de Calahonda. Tel: 952 932 042

Trafalgar Cocktail Bar

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€20 a

Italian Restaurant

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Small friendly bar. Daily sport. Karaoke on Tues and Thursday. All football matches shown. First floor El Zoco (corner) Tel: 952 935 340

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Villa Paradiso - Open since 1989

Telephone:

month

663 061 669

El Zoco, Calahonda

Fools Bar

For before and after dinner drinks. Live music Thursday, Friday, Saturday and Sunday. Open every evening until late. El Zoco First floor, Sito de Calahonda. Mijas Costa.

The Wessex Bar

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Torreblanca

Warm Friendly Atmosphere, Great Value For Money Full daytime menu Great value breakfast only 3.50 including drink Homemade 100% beefburgers Daily drinks specials Beach takeaway available All food is homemade including our chips

Extensive evening menu All food freshly prepared to order Daily chefs specials OPEN 7 DAYS 10AM-LATE ON THE BEACH FRONT IN TORREBLANCA

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DRAUGHT GUINNESS 3€ A PINT

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ALL LIVE SPORTS SHOWN ON TWO LARGE SCREENS

STRONGBOW 3€ A PINT

FOUR LIVE MATCHES ON SATURDAYS

WORTHINGTONS 3€ A PINT

FULL MENU AVAILABLE TILL LATE

MAHOU CLASSIC 1€

SUNDAY LUNCH, PORK, CHICKEN OR BEEF 2 COUSES €8

MENU OF THE DAY €5

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CARLING 2.50€ A PINT ESTRELLA GALACIA €1 SPIRIT AND MIXERS €3 ALL DAY 7 DAYS A WEEK BACON TOASTIE €1 BACON BAGUETTE €2

Probably The Cheapest Bar On The Coast Large Sunny Terrace

Los Jarales

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Sports - Cafe Bar

FOR BOOKINGS CALL: 634 670 553 C.C Los Jarales, Mijas Costa

great places to eat and drink

THE PIT STOP

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GRILL & BAR Avenida Nabuel 25 ‘Old Town’

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Marbella

952 868 225

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SPECIALISTS IN SERVING OUR CUSTOMERS FINE AUTHENTIC MEXICAN FLAVOURS SUCH AS SIZZLING FAJITAS AS WELL AS BBQ RIBS, STEAKS AND OUR HOMEMADE 100% BEEFBURGERS AND VEGETARIAN DISHES. SPECIAL LUNCH MENU 2 COURSE €7.95 3 COURSE €9.95 Served Monday to Friday 12 noon until 5.00p.m. OPEN DAILY FROM 12 NOON FRIENDLY, EFFICIENT SERVICE. GENEROUS PORTIONS AND BEST OF ALL GREAT VALUE FOOD!!! ALSO VISIT US AT : 31 33 DELFIN UNIT 2B TOWER PUERTO DE LA DUQUESA MARINA BAY MANILVA GIBRALTAR 952 893 673 0035 020 046 668

W h a t ’s O n

Sunday Roast - Sunday Roast Plus Gary Young Live - Probably the Best & Freshest Lunch on the Mijas Costa. - Vista Del Mar. Live Entertainment - Mad Terry, from 5pm Shaggys, Fuengirola Port, Courtyard. Bingo - 10.00 Bunkers Bar, Miraflores. Sunday Roast - 1pm - 10pm, The Far Isle, Riviera del Sol. Live Music - 9pm, Charleys Bar, Riviera del Sol.

ADVERTISE YOUR EVENTS!

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Nueva Andalucia

Cabaret - Dalton 9.30pm, Shenanigans, Riviera del Sol. Karaoke - Sister Bar. The Strip, Calahonda. Live Music - with Dave the Brave. Tony’s Bar, La Cortijera, La Cala Karaoke - Sisters Bar, The Strip, Calahonda. Live music - Trafalgar bar, El Zoco, Calahonda. All Live Sports - 5.30 - 9.45 Bunkers Bar Bistro, Miraflores Driving Range. Flemenco Show - Sat 5th, Vista Del Mar. Cabaret Night - Gary Young Sat 12th &

Sundays

Call: 663 061 669

Freshly Cooked Continental Deli Style Food and Desserts

Sunday roast Menu of the day 9€ Mon - Sat Fresh smoothies and juices All day breakfast Outside catering Open 7 days a week Home made cakes to order Sandwich bar Home made desserts Take away service available Outside sunny terrace

WxÄ|@|v|Éâá Tel: 952 907 876 Calle Califa No 1, Edif. Maestranza, Nueva Andalucia, Marbella.

great places to eat, drink and be entertained

Saturdays

24th, Sandy Lawrence Sat 19th, Jane Charles Sat 26th, Vista Del Mar.

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Live Music - Trafalgar Bar, El Zoco. Fish and Chip Night - The Far Isle, Riviera del Sol.

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Your Entertainment Guide

Cont. from page 40

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CAFE - BAR

Traditional and Vegetarian Fayre available including: Burgers, Lasagne, Currys, Chillis, Fresh salads, Homemade chips, All day breakfasts and much more. Quorn products, Childrens menu, and a selection of Desserts also available.

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Everything direct from London Pie, Mash and Liquer Jellied Eels, Dressed crab, Whelks, Peeled prawns, Mussels, Winkles and much more! Eat In and Take Away Now supplying wholesale

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PORTSIDE

Open daily Tuesday Sunday 10.00 18.00 Frontline Fuengirola Port Marina. Tel: 672 028 226

La Cr es a 単 ta Pe

The rural bar with the great atmosphere

Great food and Spanish tapas at Spanish prices!

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Selection of fine wines and local beers.

Regular live entertainment and karaoke in English and Spanish. Every Thursday Argentinian BBQ 8 till 11 pm. Saturday Open 12 - Late 7 days Night Live Music. Call for details.

Tel: 662 607 784 Between Hotel Byblos and Venta la Morena

CAMINO DE COIN HOTEL RODINASON

VENTA LA MORENA

RIVER BED

bars and restaurant guide

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Great places to eat and drink in Fuengirola

Cockles Seafood

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Specialists in BBQ meats

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Fine Indian Cuisine Restaurant and Take Away Open from 6pm - Midnight

Tel: 902 Indian(902 463 426)

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Mughal Village Urb. Torrenueva, Mijas Costa Fine Indian Cuisine. Restaurant and Take Away Open from 6pm - Midnight Tel: 902 463 426

CHARLEY’S

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Traditional Chinese Food. Takeaway menu. Special lunch menu only €6.95. Open 12.00-16.00 and 18.30-24.00 everyday. Riviera Commercial. Tel: 952 931 737

Papa Luigi

Traditional Italian food. Fresh pasta, wood burning pizza oven, Open every day 12 - 11. Riviera Commercial, Tel: 952 934 496

BAR & RESTAURANT

UNDER NEW MANAGEMENT

SUNDAY ROAST with Fresh Veg & Yorkshire Pud & Dessert for just 10€ Adults & 4.50€ Children NEW DAY & EVENING MENUS & DAILY SPECIALS SNACKS & TAKEAWAY AVAILABLE ALL DAY OPEN EVERYDAY SUNNY TERRACE, SEA VIEWS & SKY SPORTS. Live Entertainment - Sunday, Cash Bingo Tuesday, Karaoke - Thursday. All from 9pm

Tel: 615 315 605

1ST FLOOR RIVIERA COMMERCIAL (NEAR THE CHEMISTS), RIVIERA DEL SOL, MIJAS COSTA.

bars and restaurant guide

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Golden Sun

Great places to eat and drink in Riviera del Sol & Miraflores

Family Bar Internet Quizzes and Karaoke Live Entertainment Pool Tables Games Machines Open for Food Closed Tuesdays Beachside, Riviera del Sol Tel: 952 935 676

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Freshly Cooked Versatile Menu. Warm Friendly Atmosphere. Above Shenanigans, Beachside, Riviera del Sol Tel: 952 935 039. Closed Tuesdays. Bunkers Bar Bistro

JJ’s Bar

RIVIERA DEL SOL

SMALL FRIENDLY BAR

Specialists in Argentinian grilled meat. Take away. Open daily 10.00 - 23.00. Closed Tuesdays. Las Terrazas de Miraflores Tel: 952 930 649

En Un Rincon De La Boca

WITH LARGE SUNNY TERRACE AND FANTASTIC VIEWS OVER THE MED. LIVE SPORT FUN QUIZ NIGHTS - THURS MUSIC NIGHTS Avenida del Golf

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Breakfast, brunches, evening dinner and BBQ open 7 days a week from 10am. Wi-fi internet connection. Terrace available for private functions. Miraflores Driving Range. Tel: 952 939 381

Riviera del sol JJ’s Bar

Great places to eat and drink in Riviera del Sol & Miraflores

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the terrace.

bars and restaurant guide

Beautiful panoramic sea and beach views from

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www.internationalspain.com

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Great food

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Delicious new menu from our new chef. Serving tasty afternoon snacks, delicious evening menu, daily homemade specials. Fish and chips on Saturdays Mouthwatering Sunday lunches from 1pm - 5pm. Quality beers

Great Entertainment

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Full sky sports, setanta, Arabic TV sports. ALL major sports events All live premiership games Pool table and darts Poker Mon & Fri from 8pm Live entertainment

Great Business Centre

Internet cafe with 6 workstations Print/Fax/Scan Payphones Networking (home and small business) Advertise your business with our 1 page website, big screen, internet cafe ad promotion pack Tel: 952 455 029 Calle Juan Domiguez Moreno 65-67, El Rodeo, Coin

T h e I n t e l l i g e n c e Te s t

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shop and wants to buy a toothbrush. By imitating the action of brushing his teeth he successfully expresses himself to the shopkeeper and the purchase is done. Next, a blind man comes into the shop who wants to buy a pair of sunglasses; how does he indicate what he wants?

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Q1 Answer: If you answered that you are first, then you are, absolutely wrong! If you overtake the second person, you take his place, so you are second! Q2 Answer: If you answered that you are second to last, then you are wrong again.Tell me, how can you overtake the last person? Q3 Answer: Did you get 5000? The correct answer is actually 4100. If you don’t believe it, check it with a calculator! Today is definitely not your day, is it? Q4 Answer: Did you Answer Nunu? No! Her name is Mary. Read the question again! Bonus: He just has to open his mouth and ask...It’s really very simple... Like you! ;-)

Below are four questions and a bonus question. All you have to do is answer them instantly. You cannot take your time, ok? Question One: You are participating in a race. You overtake the second person. What position are you in? Question Two: If you overtake the last person, then you are..? Question Three: Very tricky arithmetic! Note: This must be done in your head only. Do not use paper and pencil or a calculator. Take 1000 and add 40 to it. Now add another 1000. Now add 30. Add another 1000. Now add 20. Now add another 1000. Now add 10. What is the total? Question Four: Mary’s father has five daughters: 1. Nana, 2. Nene, 3. Nini, 4. Nono. What is the name of the fifth daughter? Ok, now the Bonus Question: A mute person goes into a

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Do It Yourself !!!

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and rather angry so she phones the customer service department. She is told that this is quite impossible and that they’ll send along a fitter to take a look. The fitter arrives and assembles the cupboard. Again, a train passes and the cupboard collapses. Completely baffled by this unexpected event, the fitter decides to reassemble the cupboard and sit inside it to see whether he can find out what causes the cupboard to collapse. At this point, Rosie’s husband comes home, sees the cupboard and says, “Oh, that’s a splendid looking cupboard,” and he opens it to look inside. The fitter, who had been wondering how to explain his position in Rosie’s bedroom cupboard, blurts out, “You probably won’t believe me, but I’m standing here waiting for a train.”

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Rosie Hall buys a self-assembly, flatpack, cupboard from her local Homebase store. Reaching home Rosie reads the instructions carefully, counts the pieces then assembles the cupboard in the bedroom. It looks really great and she is delighted. Now, Rosie lives near a railway line and as the train passes by the cupboard collapses. Undaunted by this misfortune she rereads the instructions and reassembles the cupboard. Once more, another train passes and the whole cupboard collapses again. Rosie now frustrated and thinking that she must have done something “wrong” re-re-reads the instructions and re-re-assembles the cupboard. Shortly, a train passes and the whole cupboard collapses yet again for the 3rd time. Rosie is now fed up, cross

NY FF A

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ALL INST

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SINGLES SPLITS DUCTING POOL HEAT PUMPS

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GRILLS GATES FENCES STAIRWAYS BALCONIES GATES GARAGE DOORS SECURITY BLINDS NON SECURITY BLINDS PERSIANAS TOLDOS SECURITY DOORS

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ALL STEELWORK

GATE AUTOMATION For all requirements

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GARAGE DOOR MOTORS WINDOWS AND DOORS UPVC WINDOWS AND DOORS CCTV d lity an a u q , e rvic ed! lity, se arante u Reliabi g p i ansh FORTRESS workm s! Maintenance Team 0 year 2 r o f JOINERY ast the Co g n i y l TILING Supp ELECTRICAL

PHONE 952 931 128 OR 952 933 234

Email: fortress@telefonica.net www.fortresssecurityspain.com We speak Spanish, English, Portuguese and French

Cabin Crew of The Month

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vised.” In the event of a sudden loss of cabin pressure, oxygen masks will descend from the ceiling. Stop screaming, grab the mask, and pull it over your face. If you have a small child travelling with you, secure your mask before assisting with theirs. If you are travelling with two or more small children, decide now which one you love the most. After the plane landed, he said: “As you exit the plane, make sure to gather all of your belongings. Anything left behind will be distributed evenly among the flight attendants” His final announcement was, “Thank you for flying Stingem Airlines. We hope you enjoyed giving us the business as much as we enjoyed taking you for a ride.”

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The Airline cabin crew in this next tale worked for a well known airline. But to avoid embarisment and Costa Link getting suid we will call them Stingem Airways. These following anounce ments where made during the flight by the Stingem employee... “Welcome aboard Stingem Flight 971 to Malaga, we are pleased to have some of the best pilots in the industry... unfortunately, none of them are on this flight...!” Then he progressed to the famous ‘Fasten Seatbelt Routine’ What he said was, “To operate your seatbelt, insert the metal tab into the buckle, and pull tight. It works just like every other seatbelt, and if you don’t know how to operate one, you probably shouldn’t be out in public unsuper-

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Batman Flies In “Your

name,

Immigration Officer: “What’s your real name?” Passenger: “My name is Bat-man.”

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Immigration Officer: “Are you trying to be funny? What’s your surname?” Passenger: “Superman.”

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Immigration Officer: please?” Passenger: “Batman.”

Immigration Officer: (calling over to Passport Security), “Hey Bud, arrest this guy...”

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A conversation allegedly held between an US Immigration Officer at Miami International Airport and an incoming passenger.

Immigration Officer: “So you’re telling me your name is Batman Superman?” Passenger: “Yes.”

Above is the passangers ID Card.

DRAIN & LEAK

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SOLUTIONS S.L.

High Pressure water jetting Drain tracing, C.C.T.V. Septic tank problems and installations Bath, sinks and toilets unblocked Leak detection and repairs

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Mobile: 651 111 005

www.drainandleak.com

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Puzzle It Out

Solutions on page 98

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Quick Crossword

Down 1.Cutting tool (3) 2.Remedy (4) 3.Wildcat (6) 4.Contradiction in terms (7) 6.Article of clothing (7) 8.Findings of a jury (7) 9.Of times long past (7) 11.Attack (6) 14.Dull pain (4) 17.Concealed (3)

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Across 1.Oily or greasy (9) 5.Bet (5) 7.Young eel (5) 9.Land measure (4) 10.Sultry (6) 12.Dairy product (6) 13.Hex (4) 15.Crowd scene actor (5) 16.Hidden drawback (5) 18.Accumulated (9)

Picture Puzzles

Sudoku

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Can you work out what common phrases or sayings these pictures represent?

Say What You See...

SGEG

DEATH/LIFE

to sponsor this page please call: 663 061 669

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Boulevard de La Cala, Mijas Costa Tel: 619 178 194 www.ingridbatikfashion.com

Cool Summer Styles for all Ages & Sizes

We cater for all sizes with our extensive range of beach and evening wear, ladies dresses, jumpsuits, caftans, kimonos, ponchos, sarongs and lots more.

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Strange but true... Tigers have striped skin, not just striped fur.

There are: 170,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000 ways to play the ten opening moves in a chess game.

A cockroach will live nine days without its head before it starves to death.

A jiffy is an actual unit of time for 1/100th of a second! It takes 8.5 minutes for light to get from the sun to earth.

A rat can last longer without water than a camel. The average human will eat one pound of insects in their lifetime. Men pass wind an average of 17 times a day, and women pass wind an average of 9 times a day.

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Happy Birthday? Youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re not so unique â&#x20AC;&#x201C; in fact you share your birthday with at least other nine million people.

No word in the English language rhymes with month, orange, silver, or purple.

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If you counted 24 hours a day, it would over 30,000 years to reach one trillion!

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111,111,111 multiplied by 111,111,111 equals 12,345,678,987,654,321.

METACONA Manufacturers of ornate iron work

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Aluminium doors and windows Mosquito screens Shower screens Electric shutters suppliers of scissor gates Stainless steEl welding and fabrications Toldos manual or electric cctv and smoke screen

Nave 8, Fase 3, Poligono La Vega, Camino Coin, Mijas Costa

Tel: 617 760 155 Email: metacona@hotmail.com 66

to advertise please call 663 061 669

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teleweb internet & telephone just got better!

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teleweb internet & telephone, has been providing wireless internet services since 2003, and in that time, has seen consistent growth and added new exciting services to its well established high speed 5GHz wireless internet service. FLEXIBILITY: Because you do not need a land line, you can have internet on a ‘Pay as you go’ system. There are flexible solutions ranging from one hour to a permanent connection for someone who lives here full

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time. Do you have a wireless internet system that you are not happy with? teleweb will convert you over to their service at no cost. What have you got to lose? EXCITING NEWS! teleweb offers a telephone system (without the need for a landline) with calls from 1.8c per minute. It is just like a Telefonica landline without the wires. No need to have your computer on to make and receive calls. Choose a telephone number from your home country or just elect to have a Malaga number. This system will work anywhere in the world with the same low call costs, you just need an internet connection. For more information on any of the above, please call teleweb on: 952 833 300 or Email: info@teleweb-marbella.

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Cheapest and best cover for Cars (UK and Spanish), Travel, House, Bikes, Bars, Offices, Life, Health. Unique Health Plan exclusive to EU INSURANCE DIRECT covers pre-existing conditions. Protection Plans for the Self Employed, Sickness, Accident, Disability.

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PARKER SOL PROPERTIES & COSTALETS

Tel: 952 56 39 39 / 608 44 09 12 www.costalet.com C.I.F: B-92171388

C/ Sagitario 6, Jardines de Gamonal Blq 7, 29631 Arroyo de la Miel

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IF YOU WISH TO BUY, SELL OR RENT LONG TERM FROM TORREMOLINOS TO ELVIRIA, CALL US NOW.

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JUST 165,000€!

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CALAHONDA. TOWNHOUSE

STUDIOS MINERVA AND JUPITER COMPLEX, SEA & MOUNTAIN VIEWS, WALKING DISTANCE TO BEACH, BEAUTIFUL POOL & GARDENS

STUDIO AGATA COMPLEX 1 BED CORNER APARTMENT PARTLY RENOVATED, SEA JUPITER COMPLEX POOL AND AND MOUNTAIN VIEWS, GARDEN VIEWS, GUARANTEED RENTAL INCOME, 24 HOUR RECEPTION, WONDERFULL COMPLEX POOLS AND GARDEN, AFTERNOON SUN FANTASTIC LOCATION

RENTALS MIJAS AREA CALL ALISTAIR:- 608 440 912

RENTALS BENALMADENA AREA CALL STEVE:- 651 756 185

CALANOVA GOLF, 2 BEDROOM/ 2 BATH 600€ per month RIVIERA DEL SOL, 2 BED UNFURNISHED: 450€ per month TORRENUEVA, 1 BED 500€ per month

BENALMADENA COSTA, STUDIOS FROM: 370€ month ARROYO DE LA MIEL, MIEL, 1 BED, 450 € per month NUEVA TORREQUEBRADA, 2 BED 600€ per month

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Discover the Rio Grande Valley on horseback, go back in time, ride along stunning mountain trails where eagles and red winged kites fly over head, set out from ‘Ride With Me’ at Rancho Bravo, near Coín, with its impressive landscapes, mountains and rich historic culture it is a paradise for those who love horseback riding. This is why ‘Ride With Me’ decided to create one of the most complete horseback riding adventures in Andalucia. It is essential that you have a certain experience with horse back riding. Sensible hands and strong legs are important for horse and rider to feel comfortable with each other. Kalle says, “our horses are mostly cross breeds: SpanishArabic and of course our P-R-E Stallions that we are proud of and can offer to good experienced riders. Accommodation is also offered at the 150 year old cortijo, which has a lot of character and history. For more informaton, visit the website www.ride-inspain.com call 667 541 414 or Email: info@ride-in-spain.com What are you waiting for? Come and ride with me!

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Horse Riding Adventure

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TILE SHOWROOM AND WAREHOUSE

On Paint selected

5 litres from €17 20 litres: White & Colour

Tile ranges buy 2 3 for the price of 2 2m Get third free! Calle Bilbao No. 4. San Pedro de Alcantara Email: hardrocktiles@hotmail.com

Office: 951 275 257 Ralph: 619 412 288 Gill: 667 513 977 A ‘swim bebe swim’ franchise owned and operated under

RETAINING WALL SOLUTIONS

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Are you wasting valuable land? Garden on a slope, no room for a pool?

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A modular block system and EC7 approved An engineered solution means a safe retaining wall No more waiting - fast installation and a planned programme Looks l ike natural stone â&#x20AC;&#x201C; custom colouring Affordable and maintenance free No hidden costs Guaranteed work, qual ified installers

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Tel/Fax: 0034 952 666 547 www.retainingwallsolutions.eu

Things That Make You Go...Mmmm

Ingredients - Serves 4

175g cherries, stoned 125g blueberries 400g strawberries, hulled 150g raspberries 50g vanilla sugar 240g Panna cotta

3.Stir in the strawberries and return the dish to the oven for 10-15 minutes, or until the fruits are tender and the juices begin to run. 4.Remove the dish from the oven and stir the raspberries into the hot fruits. Cool for 10 minutes then spoon over the panna cotta.

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Round off your meal with vanilla flavoured summer berries that have been gently baked in the oven.

2.Sprinkle with the sugar and place the dish in the oven. Bake uncovered for 15 minutes.

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Baked Summer Fruits with Panna Cotta

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1. Preheat the oven to 180c, gas mark 4. Place the cherries and blueberries in a large, shallow, ovenproof dish.

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We are a friendly team that enjoy our work so if you are really serious about your transport or removal needs, then please give us a call and speak to someone that has the knowledge, experience and enthusiasm to help you make the right choices. We look forward to hearing from you soon!

LOCAL & EUROPEAN REMOVALS

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NO JOB TOO BIG OR TOO SMALL

TEL: 952 816 582 www.focus-transport.com QUALITY FURNISHINGS INTERIOR/EXTERIOR/MARINE FURNITURE RE-COVERED OR MADE FROM NEW

QUALITY MOBILE VALETING

CARS/BOATS/MOTORBIKES ETC. INTERIOR AND EXTERIOR POLISHING AND CLEANING

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HEADBOARDDS UPHOLSTERED (SIZE TO SUIT YOUR REQUIREMENTS) BARS/RESTAURANTS/ RENTAL PROPERTY FURNITURE RE-UPHOLSTERED OR CLEANED. MATTRESSES DEEP CLEANED RUGS DEEP CLEANED UPHOLSTERY FABRIC/LEATHER CLEANED.

BEFORE

AFTER

CALL DAVID LOVICK ON: 671 608 353

The Office

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office late one evening when he found the CEO standing in front of a shredder with a piece of paper in his hand. “Listen,” said the CEO, “this is a very sensitive and important document here, and my secretary has gone for the night. Can you make this thing work?” “Certainly,” said the young executive. He turned the machine on, inserted the paper, and pressed the start button. “Excellent, excellent!” said the CEO as his paper disappeared inside the machine. “I just need one copy.”

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Reaching the end of a job interview, the Human Resources executive asked the young MBA fresh out of Oxford, “And what starting salary were you looking for?” The candidate said, “In the neighbourhood of €120,000 a year, depending on the benefits package.” The HR executive said, “Well, what would you say to a package of 5-weeks holiday, 14 paid holidays, full medical and dental, company matching retirement fund to 50% of salary, and a company car leased every 2 years - say, a black Porsche Boxter?” The Engineer sat up straight and said, “Wow!!! Are you kidding?” And the HR executive said, “I certainly am, ...but you started it.” A young executive was leaving the

over 60’s

cash equity release no repayments during your lifetime

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absolutely no investment tie-in 100% cash payment to you cash lump sum and/or guaranteed monthly income major English & Spanish lenders

free English speaking solicitor also mortgages, remortgages & homeowner loans seniorscapital.com 965 583 885 info@seniorscapital.com

Your long term property rental specalists

La Cala de Mijas. 2 bedroom townhouses with office garage and garden. Furnished or unfurnished. Communal pool, paddle tennis, A/C and Sky T.V. From €750 per month.

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La Cala de Mijas. 3 bedroom townhouses with office, garage and garden. Furnished or unfurnished. Communal pool, paddle tennis, A/C and Sky T.V. From €850 per month.

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Tel: 671 093 925 Website: www.costarents.com Email: info@costarents.com

Riviera del Sol 3 bed, 2 bath townhouse with large garden and garage. Fully fitted kitchen, lounge /diner, Fully furnished or unfurnished. €850 per month.

Urgently required townhouses and villas to rent on long term basis.

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Please see our website for more properties! No finders Fee!

Golf Tips And Tricks What Is The Line Of The Putt? by

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MARK SIBLEY

Mark Sibley of Miraflores Golf Academy.

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UK QUALIFIED 15 YEARS OF COACHING EXPERIENCE LESSONS FOR ALL LEVELS OF GOLFER BEGINNER TO PLAYING PROFESSIONAL LESSON PACKAGES AVAILABLE NOW BASED AT THE MIRAFLORES GOLF ACADEMY

NOW WITH FULLY STOCKED PROFESSIONAL SHOP

MIRAFLORES DRIVING RANGE & GOLF ACADEMY. S/N RIVIERA DEL SOL, 29649 MIJAS COSTA. TEL: 952 933 729 OR 678 833 736

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Now there is a question and one which some golfers have very strong and wrong opinions about. I listened to two players in heated discussion over the subject, one who believed the line of the putt was a description of the direction the ball took after being struck, and the other arguing back that it was the line the player selected to putt along. Now, I hope it did not take the golfer reading this long to side with our man arguing back, the line of the putt is the line selected by the player to putt along, allowing for the ups and downs of the putting surface, and with the right weight the direct route for the putt to sink. We have all watched the professional golfers on tour walking around the green holding their putters up like dumb bells, searching for that line to the cup that will win the tournament. Most armature players can pick a good line, the problem then comes developing the confidence to putt along the line selected, a fault I see a lot when coaching. A player who sees a left to right break then sets up to play it, but still puts straight at the hole, or for some reason and just before putting changes his mind increasing or decreasing the line and weight of the putt when played. Positive putting is the key to lower putting averages, so how do we bring confidence to the player? First he must see his choice is good when selecting the line of the putt, and that by putting along it, his putts will sink. Take 3 balls, a golf tee and your putter to the practice green, and starting with a putt about 3m from the green find the line of the putt, walk to the end of the line and stick the tee into the green behind the back line of the cup, set yourself up to the line of the putt and putt towards the tee peg, if you have chosen the right line of putt, and the weight of the putt is correct, the ball should sink. Using this drill learn from what the ball

PGA GOLF PROFESSIONAL

Golf Academy

does, if you feel the line is correct but the weight was not or you did not putt along your line, then take another ball and try again, but be honest, if you have picked the wrong line start again, pick another line and move the tee. This drill will help you to pick the right line and putt down it.

Golfing About The schoolteacher was taking her first golfing lesson. “Is the word spelt p-u-t or p-u-t-t?” she asked the instructor. “P-u-t-t is correct,” he replied. “Put means to place a thing where you want it. Putt means merely a vain attempt to do the same thing.”

www.costalinkmagazine.com

SUMMER 2009: 1ST JUNE TO 3OTH SEPT BUGGY BUGGY

30.00€ 15.00€

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18 HOLES 42.00€ 9 HOLES 25.00€

SPECIAL OFFER BUGGY RENTAL AFTER 12:00 (HRS) 15.00€

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TWILIGHT GOLF 25 EUROS

SANTA MARIA GOLF & COUNTRY CLUB Urb. Elviria, C.N.340 Km. 192 29604 Marbella (Malaga) Tel: 952 831 036 Fax: 952 834 797

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SUMMER SPECIAL 2009 after 12:00 OFFER VALID 1ST JUNE TO 30TH SEPTEMBER 49.50 EUROS INCLUDING SHARED BUGGY

E-Mail: caddymaster@santamariagolfclub.com Website: www.santamariagolfclub.com

Funny five Minutes

Someday I hope to marry... (inside card) Someone other than you. Happy birthday! You look great for your age... (inside card) Almost lifelike!

Congratulations on your new bundle of joy... (inside card) Did you ever find out who the father was? You are such a good friend. If we were on a sinking ship and there was only one life jacket... (inside card) I’d miss you terribly. And think of you often. Your friends and I wanted to do something really special for your birthday... (inside card) So we’re having you put to sleep.

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When we were together, You said you’d die for me... (inside card) Now we’ve broken up, I think it’s time to keep your promise.

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Congratulations on your promotion. Before you go... (inside card) Will you take the knife from my back? You’ll probably need it again.

we stop? I'm so miserable without you... (inside card) It’s almost like you’re still here.

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Situations Hallmark Cards Don't Cover ... continued from last month

We’ve been friends for a very long time... (inside card) What do you say

Looking back over the years we’ve been together, I can’t help but wonder... (inside card) What was I thinking?

La Cala de Mijas

No ob quo ligatio tatio n n

“our showroom is next door to Snr Nicks”

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Ta i l o r m a d e f u r n i t u r e p a c k a g e s & m a k e o v e r s o l u t i o n s

Are you struggling for ideas, time or patience for your property? Take the stress out of what should be a wonderful new phase in your life. New or existing properties, we can help you. Call Dilys for a no-obligation quotation, from dressing one window to a whole furniture package. Our showroom is situated between the BP petrol sation and the Farmacia, next door to Sr. Nick’s. Tel: 952 494 155. Dilys: 600 583 673. Web: www.whitedesignco.com. Email: info@whitedesignco.com

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F o ru m HAIR & BEAUTY SPA

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GEL OR ACRYLIC NAILS Full Set - only 42 euros Infills - only 28 euros

FULL HEAD FOIL HIGHLIGHTS Cut and blowdry and a hands or feet tidy and paint. Only 80 euros. Introduce a friend and you will both receive 10â&#x201A;Ź off your next treatment. Offers are available until the end of August Excluding Wednesdays.

952 59 90 98 www.forumhairandbeauty.com Edificio Calasol, Local B 13. La Cala de Mijas, Mijas Costa

What ’s New Quartet Showroom Kitchens Offering a free design and quotation service, call 951 704 594 or visit thier showrooms at Fuengirola, Marbella or their brand new showroom at Benalmadena-Torremolinos www.quartethome.com.

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Business 1st - Showcase and Raffle in aid of Caras Felices Charity, Business 1st members and other local businesses will be exhibiting all day offering information about their services as well as fantastic discounts and products. The Mayor of Mijas will be opening the event and there will be a host of entertainment including a mega raffle with lots of prizes, a Hog roast lunch, and a bar for alcohol, tea and coffees. Join us at the Vista Del Mar Restaurant at Playa Miraflores on Friday 25th September 10am to 5pm Tel: 952 777 777, www.business1st.es.

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Wow! - Thinking of Throwing a Party? there is so much to think about and organise to make everything run smoothly and not to disappoint your

loved one’s and your guests. Wow! Is a new Events and Promotions company call 622 221 930 for more information.

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Platinum Cleaning & Property Protection - Offers cleaning and property management services. They offer for 40 euro’s per week a daily check on your property and use a computer scanner to prove each visit has been done. Call for details 666 701 735.

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Specialists in timber decking, pergola’s and gazebo’s.

Increase your living space and improve your lifestyle.

us in Estepona port

For more information or a free quotation please contact:

Happy Days Ice Cream Parlour. Fancy a banana split, american donut, fruity flavour milkshake or just a scoop of deliciously refreshing ice cream? Join us in the only 1950´s themed Ice Cream Parlour in Estepona! Find

Email: info@ecodeckspain.com

www.ecodeckspain.com

Monday - Sunday 12am - 10pm Fully Air Conditioned.

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Spas 4 You .Com

Neck, Back & Shoulder Pain & Problem Knee & Ankle Pain Muscle & Ligament Problems RSI & Occupational Injuries Gait & Bio Mechanical Analysis Prescription Orthotics

At the Aztec Country Club

HOT TUBS & JACUZZI SPAS A spa for every size and budget

Estepona Poligono Please call to make an appointment to view. 902 88 11 02 617 63 92 15 www.spas4you.com email: info@spas4you.com

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Riviera del Sol

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The Injury Clinic Treats:

664 60 16 29 www.injuryclinic.eu e-mail: info@injuryclinic.eu

RWS

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The best solution

ASSURED VIRILITY Personal or postal delivery.

Kamagra tablets, jellies and Cialis 100% Discreet & best prices. Bernie 669 641 859 or email:

berniesanpedro@hotmail.com

Specialists in: Excavation Landscaping Land reclamation Land clearance Retaining walls of any type Movement of materials Excavators from 1.5 ton to 32 ton Trucks up to 32 ton Tel/fax: 952 666 547 Mob: 677 415 702

Marion Hughes English Midwife Ante Natal/PostNatal care and support. Baby Clinic Clinic: 952 780 540 Mob: 647 379 808 www.costadelsolmidwife.com marion@costadelsolmidwife.com www.marbellanannies.com

Cocktails Fresh Fraise - for the kids

Try this cocktail with fresh raspberries as well as the syrup to enhance the fruit flavours, to give the mix a smoother finish. Muddle 10 raspberries in a shaker, pour in the ingredient, shake and strain.

This blend makes a great-tasting, healthy after-dinner cocktail. 4 Fresh strawberries

1 Peach or Nectarine (peeled and sliced)

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Ingredients

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Brandy Daisy - for the adults

1/2 Banana (sliced)

56ml Brandy

112ml Milk

Juice of 1/2 a lemon

112ml Plain yogurt

1tsp raspberry syrup 1/2tsp powdered caster sugar Method

Pinch Cinnamon or Nutmeg Method

Blend all of the ingredients together with a quarter cup of crushed ice until smooth. Garnish with fresh mint leaves and a strawberry.

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Shake all the ingredients together with ice and strain into an ice filled glass. Garnish with 5 fresh raspberries.

A drop of vanilla extract

Offers: 170,000â&#x201A;Źuros Apartment

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Ref: A-096 & A-105 Collna Park, Mijas Costa

TWO FOR THE PRICE OF ONE In this popular development near to La Cala de Mijas and Fuengirola. A duplex apartment with 2 bedrooms. Downstairs is a double bedroom with fitted wardrobes, bathroom, f/f kitchen and lounge/diner with balcony. Upstairs is a large second bedroom and balcony with views to the coast and mountain. PLUS In the same development a large corner apartment with bedroom, bathroom, f/f kitchen and lounge diner with terrace. Views to the coast and mountains. Sold fully furnished. Now rented for â&#x201A;Ź400 per month. Available with tenant.

Rainbow Estate Spain Urb. Cerros del Aguila Colina Park D - Local Bajo 1 29649, Mijas Costa.

www.rainbowestatespain.com info@rainbowestatespain.com Tel: + 34 952 630 182 Mob: +34 635 980 210

HOG ROAST

Full catering services available BEST ON PRICE Machine hire service available from 100 euros a day. We sell Hog Machines

653 461 382 j.w@ardenpigcompany.co.uk

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ocal Info

Medical

Emergency 061 Ambulance Marbella 902 505 061 Ambulance Coin 952 453 267

Train Timetables 902 240 202 Airports Malaga 952 048 844 Gibraltar 956 773 026

Fire Brigade

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Health Centres Marbella 952 769 946 Coin 952 452 767 San Pedro 952 787 700

Town Halls

Marbella 952 761 100 San Pedro 952 453 020 La Cala de Mijas 952 493 208 Fuengirola 952 589 300 Estepona 952 801 100

Emergency number 080 Marbella 952 774 349 Estepona 952 804 483 Fuengirola 952 461 046

Consulates

952 952 952 952 952 952 952

Markets

352 475 226 604 212 226 474

300 108 373 383 442 590 891

Monday - Marbella (fairground site on east side) Tuesday - Fuengirola (fairground near Los Boliches) Wednesday - Estepona (Avda. Juan Carlos) La Cala - Feria ground Thursday - San Pedro (Recinto Ferial) Alhaurin el Grande - (La Fama) Friday - Alhaurin el Grande (Bar Aquamania) Saturday - Coin (Calle Urbano Pineda) La Cala - Feria ground. Sunday - Puerto Estepona

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British Ireland Denmark Sweden Germany France U.S.A

Tourist Information

Marbella Coin Estepona Fuengirola San Pedro

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Cinemas

Bus Stations Marbella 952 764 400 Coin 952 450 366 San Pedro 952 781 396 Estepona 952 800249 For a list of complete times www.andalucia.com/travel/bus

All the Cinemas listed below show films in English as well as Spanish. Call first to check what is showing that week. Marbella: Cinesur Plaza del Mar 952 766 941 La Cañada 902 333 231 Puerto Banus: Gran Marbella 952 810 077 Coin: La Trocha 951 315 039 Fuengirola Cinesur Miramar 902 221 622

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Central number for Fire, Police & Ambulance National Police Local Police Guardia Civil dica

(Marina)

Transport

Emergency Numbers

952 771 442 952 822 818 952 822 818 952 467 457 952 785 252

Chemists 24 hour chemist Urb. Artola, Ctra. Cadiz Km 194. Marbella. Tel: 952 83 25 89

Taxis Marbella Taxis 952 774 488 Mijas Costa Taxis 952 476 593

Diary Dates 6th - 11th September 2009 Mijas Fair. 8th September 2009 - Mijas “Virgin of the Rock”. Public holiday with many religious processions. 23rd September 2009 Tourist Day, Mijas Village

25th September 2009 - Local business Showcase Exhibition & Raffle. Vista del Mar.

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Q. I’m two months pregnant now. When will my baby move? A. With any luck, right after he finishes college.

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A traveling salesman rings the doorbell, and 10-year-old Little Johnny answers, holding a beer and smoking a fat cigar. The salesman says, “Young man, is your mother home?” Little Johnny taps his ash on the carpet and says, “What the hell do you think?”

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Three engineering students were gathered together discussing the possible designers of the human body. One said, “It was a mechanical engineer. Just look at all the joints.” Another said, “No, it was an electrical engineer. The nervous system has many thousands of electrical connections. The last one said, “No, actually it had to have been a civil engineer. Who else would run a toxic waste pipeline through a recreational area?”

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Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson go on a camping trip, set up their tent, and fall asleep. Some hours later, Holmes wakes his faithful friend. “Watson, look up at the sky and tell me what you see.” Watson replies, “I see millions of stars.” “What does that tell you?” Watson ponders for a minute. “Astronomically speaking, it tells me that there are millions of galaxies and potentially billions of planets. Astrologically, it tells me that Saturn is in Leo. Timewise, it appears to be approximately a quarter past three. Theologically, it’s evident the Lord is allpowerful and we are small and insignificant. Meteorologically, it seems we will have a beautiful day tomorrow. What does it tell you?” Holmes is silent for a moment, then speaks. “Watson, you idiot, someone has stolen our tent.” A man rushes into his house and yells to his wife; “Martha, pack up your things. I just won the lottery!” Martha replies, “Shall I pack for warm weather or cold?” The man responds, “I don’t care. Just so long as you're out of the house by noon!"

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S TA R S I GN S

A look at what's in store for you during September...

Pisces

Relationships are a strong focus for you. A partnerâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s needs is important now. The 8-14 brings romantic excitement, news, and money opportunities. Some of you may find that your career is moving in a more service-oriented direction, and professional success is there.

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Aries

Career matters move forward, and the focus is on increasing business income. An awakening of emotional consciousness occurs around the Full Moon in your sign on the 15th. Stellar days on the 17-22 offer opportunities in the areas of family and relationships.

There is a scurry of activity. The 1014 is a strong period for work, romance, and money. Take advantage! Income from foriegn sources could also figure this month. While your work demands a lot of attention, you are also able to get away from the daily routine.

Taurus

Gemini

Leo

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Aquarius

Spirit for adventure and intrigue takes hold, when the humdrum simply doesnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t satisfy! Friendships move forward, and you may be repaid if youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re waiting on a friend. An epiphany regarding money or possessions occurs around the 15th.

Romantic and creative energy runs high. Financial gains may come through a partnership, or there may be an increase in a partner'sincome. The 12-14 represents an opportunity period for you, particularly in the areas of romance, children, and friendship.

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Cancer

Home life figures strongly this month. The lines of communication open up between you and a special someone. Income from work activities is strong. Pleasant news arrives around the Full Moon on the 15th, and has to do with travel, legal, or education.

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Others are likely to turn to you for advice. Trips could be especially rewarding for you right now, they can provide a pleasant breather from pressures in your life. Capricorn Romance may be found through your career and business activities. A private project can pay off now.

Virgo

Libra

Scorpio

Practical matters and communications are a big focus for you. Security in your job is likely to boost your confidence. The 4-5 brings romantic and creative opportunities; while the 12-13 can be tricky when it comes to relating with others. Finances are in focus and strong. You might find that expressing yourself creatively really helps to define yourself, and it could lead to some profits as well. You are feeling less private and more open about your opinions now. The 15th brings surprises from a partner.

A busy month is in store for you. Opportunities fall into your lap. The 10-14 presents opportunities for partnerships, and negotiations. The 15-16 brings surprises surrounding work and health. The 22-23 is strong for personal finances, and acquiring new possessions. You may find yourself in demand socially, most of your activities are behind the scenes. Relationships with a partner are low-key. A scurry of activity surrounding romance or children occurs around the 15th. Chances are excellent you will find a lovely confidante this month.

Friendships and group activities, figure strongly for you. This month projects bear fruit, and practical matters are especially favorable. You may have more resources to Sagittarius invest into your career, being in a position of responsibility is something you place a high value on.

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