Delighted Soul - 2019 - April

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April 2019

DELIGHTED SOUL PURE, FOCUSED

& CLEAN FOR SPRING


Letter from the Editor Spring is here and it’s the season of new beginnings! Every season has it’s own perks. Summer is most kids’ (and teachers’) dream come true. The warm weather means fun in the sun, and those of us who aren’t in education enjoy the reduced traffic during our work commute. The fall is often a nightmare for students, young and old, and sometimes teachers, but the silver lining of heading back to school is the reunion with with friends after a long summer apart. Winter gives us an excuse to stay bundled up inside – sorry, that’s my introvert showing. But seriously, there’s not a more special time than celebrating the holidays with family, friends, and coworkers. And then there’s spring. The snow has melted (that’s an inside joke that only Houstonians will get), the sun sets later, fresh flowers are blooming – and that’s just outside our homes. What fun, life-changing activity do we often relate to spring inside our homes?? Cleaning. That’s right. We’ve finally recovered from hosting the holiday parties, and it’s time to bring out the bright décor. The storage boxes are ready for all of the things we don’t need and the windows need cleaning so we can see the sun shine clearly. But what about the place where we live all day, every day, whether we’re home, or away? How can we spring clean our souls? Let’s start with the way we think, the things we say, the company we keep, and where we spend our time. Let’s reconsider some people, places, and things that we’ve been holding on to for no reason at all, things that have kept us comfortable, while also maybe keeping us from growth and maturity, fresh starts and freedom. This issue has you covered inside and out. To kick it off, here is the Every Girl’s list of 8 Seemingly Positive Things in Your Life That Are Actually Making You Unhappy. Enjoy!

Jasmine Powell

Recommended Podcasts Woman Evolve with Sarah Jakes Roberts Join SJR as she shares her take on the week’s top stories in news and entertainment. Note: The Delegation is currently on a break, but you can catch up on 42 episodes of good times.

Journeywomen

Jesus & Jollof

Life’s a journey we were never meant to walk alone. We all need friends along the way! On the Journeywomen podcast we’ll chat with Christian leaders about gracefully navigating the seasons and challenges we face on our journeys to glorify God.

Jesus and Jollof is a podcast featuring Luvvie Ajayi and Yvonne Orji, two proudly Nigerian women (who have no behavior) talking about the things they love, their stories, and life in general. Why “Jesus and Jollof?” Those are the two things they cannot do without. Besides, the other option was “2 Goat Queens.”


Table of Contents

4 5 10 12

Michelle’s Jewels

WISDOM FROM MICHELLE POWELL

Removing the Clutter IDEAS BY KRYSTAL HAWKINS

A magazine for young women in pursuit of deeper relationships with Jesus.

Go Sis, Go!

ASHA WINFIELD’S JOURNEY

Break It Down UNDERSTANDING WHAT THE BIBLE SAYS ABOUT PURITY & POSITIVITY


Michelle’s Jewels PURIFY ME LORD

Words of Wisdom from Mother-In-Chief Michelle Powell

PURIFY: To make pure. To free from anything that contaminates. To free from guilt or evil. When Spring is in the air, you can hear the birds chirping and the bees buzzing, see flowers blooming, trees growing green leaves, and crisp blades of grass growing on the lawn. There’s a mix of warm sunny days and balmy rainy days. All areas are covered with fresh fallen pollen – the house, the cars, the patio furniture, and garbage can. We can think of pollen as the sin that contaminates a soul, affecting all areas of our lives. This pestering sign of Spring agitates your allergies causing runny eyes and noses, sneezing, coughing and sinus headaches. These cold-like symptoms are the consequences of the pollen, which we can think of as the consequences of sin. As unusual as it sounds, we begin to look forward to the rainy days of Spring that wash away the residue of pollen. When the rain falls, we can think of it as our Lord washing away our sins and covering us with His blood after we confess and ask for forgiveness. Our Lord purifies us through the washing of our sins. We have been chosen to live a life of purity and holiness as believers in Jesus Christ (Ephesians 1:4). In this new Spring season, let us put our past hurts, wrongs, and sins behind us. Let us ask God to purify our hearts and minds. Cleanse me with hyssop, and I will be clean; wash me, and I will be whiter than snow (Psalm 51:7). We must do things that will glorify God. Think of a blank canvas. It is clean, undisturbed, serene, and undefiled. As soon as the painter begins to stroke her first dot of paint on the blank canvas, it becomes marred, disturbed, and defiled. The Bible teaches us that through one man sin entered into the world [for that] all [have] sinned (Romans 5:12). When humans are born, we are born into sin and shaped in iniquity. No matter how sweet and innocent a baby may look, he or she is marred. No matter how precious a life a baby may hold, it is born into sin. Our only way to be freed of sin is to have our sins covered by the blood of Jesus. We as believers are called to live a pure, blameless, and holy life in Christ Jesus (Ephesians 1:4). In order for God to purify us, we must seek the Lord while He may be found; [and] call upon Him while He is near (Isaiah 55:6). We must present [our] bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and pleasing to God, [which is our] true and proper worship (Romans 12:1-2). We are to guard our hearts and be ever so careful how we carry things in them. God is always watching and always knowing our motives. He checks our heart and sees when we love, forgive, help, speak to, and compliment others, etc. May [the] words of [our mouths] and [the] meditation of [our hearts] be pleasing in your sight, Lord, [our] Rock and [our] Redeemer (Psalm 19:14). God knows if your actions come from a pure, clean heart. We are to live our life and do God’s work with a pure heart for there is a reward when we do. Blessed are the pure in heart: for they will see God (Matt 5:8). When you are doing God’s work, you do not have to announce that you are helping others by feeding the hungry, praying and visiting the sick, clothing the needy, giving money for gas or meeting a family’s children’s needs. Give to the needy in private and God will bless you before men (Matthew 6:1-4). We are to do what is right according to God’s commandments and requirements, and not look for reward from other individuals, but from God. When we live life from a pure heart, we simply do the right thing because it is the right thing to do. Set an example for the believers, in speech, in conduct, in charity, in love, in faith and in purity (I Timothy 4:12b). 4 | DELIGHTED SOUL | APRIL 2019


Removing the Clutter: Mind and Space Ideas from Krystal Hawkins (@kryslejoye)

Let’s be honest. I needed spring cleaning long before this season actually arrived. When I moved in February, it gave me a chance to throw away items I rarely used, but I still have more work to do. There are too many unpacked boxes now stored in the corners of my apartment. Ugh. Sitting there, adding to my stress level because of all the things I need to get done. As I cling on to random items I may not need, I’ve also caused my mind to function in the same way – clinging to unwanted stress. For some of us who work full-time, have kids, go to school, or have a long list of things to do; we increase our stress levels. And when the home is unorganized, it can reflect just how cluttered our minds are. Since many of us have learned to function in clutter – Black women specifically – we have taught ourselves to adjust to the chaos or stress that happens in our daily lives.

According to the Black Consumers’ Diet and Wellness Market Report, about 8 in 10 Black women live with some level of stress, with a majority saying that their lives seem somewhat stressful. Additionally, almost 54% of Black women somewhat agree that being stressed is normal. Although Black women can live through chaos and handle stress, it still has an affect on our health. As we blossom into our best selves this spring, ladies, let’s be sure to remove clutter from our minds and our personal spaces. Here are my top recommendations to help restore the mind and declutter the home altogether. APRIL 2019 | DELIGHTED SOUL | 5


Get Your Mind Right ONE. DEVOTIONAL / BOOK READING

Create a new morning ritual by feeding your mind with positivity. For those like me that want to start the day off with God, try starting it off with a Bible app devotional.

Daily devotionals can provide spiritual focus and guidance for each calendar year. Many of them are derived from good book reads. So if you are a bookworm, reading a daily devotional can help explore what new reads to dig into. This month, my recommended devotional is titled “Enough: Silence the Lies that Steal Your Confidence.” This is a 7-day devotional that was derived from its entitled book, published by Sharon Jaynes. Jaynes is an author, teacher and speaker that has encouraged women through ministry for over 25 years. In the book and devotional Enough, Jaynes empowers women to embrace all the qualities that have been uniquely fashioned by God. You can read more details about the devotional here.

TWO. MUSIC VIBES

THREE. A PLANNER FOR PLANNERS

Get your to-do list out of your mind and onto some written paper! The 2019-2020 Day Designer planner was created to help with productivity, focus, goal setting and daily reminders. Each planner has its own custom design with a calendar and planning worksheets for all the things you need to get done. Order one for yourself and one for a friend because many are available now for 50% off. I got mine shipped just last week, and can’t wait to use it. If you like to compare your options, here’s a list of 2019’s most recommended planners.

What have you been listening to lately? To get you in the spring cleaning vibe, take a moment to generate your favorite playlist or explore a new album. My recommendation: Solange’s new album When I Get Home. If you don’t know already, this album is a merge of jazz instrumental and hip hop roots that will help reset your mindset. 6 | DELIGHTED SOUL | APRIL 2019


FOUR. ESSENTIAL OIL TO STAY CALM

Essential oils can also be used to help reduce anxiety, the natural way. Lavender, one of the most popular oils, can be used for almost anything including anxiety. This oil signals off a floral aroma, and can help to improve sleep, calm nerves, and soothe migraines. Simply diffuse lavender throughout the home, in bathtub water or rub one or two drops near the temples, ears or onto the chest area. Chamomile is also known for relieving stress and anxiety. It has a fruity scent and is often categorized as a sedative, helping to stimulate emotional response in the body and to calm nerves. Consider using diffusing this oil in the air when lounging around the home, right before bedtime or sleeping. Ladies, it can also be used to relieve PMS!!! Cedarwood is another oil used for anxiety. Unlike the other fruity aromas, cedarwood has a woody scent infused with spice. It is often used to improve focus, release tension and can help treat hair loss. This oil can be diffused in the air at home, rubbed on the wrist, temples, or forehead and can be applied to conditioner/shampoo for hair treatment.

Make More Space

ONE. HAND OVER THE BAG/PURSE

“Bag lady you gone hurt your back. Dragging all them bags like that. I guess nobody ever told you. All you must hold onto, is you, is you, is you.” - Erykah Badu To all the bag ladies out there, it’s time to clean out the purse. Packed with all types of things – phone, wallet, makeup, toiletries, pens, sticky notes, shades – the purse holds all needed items from home, away from home.

Start to declutter section by section of your purse. First thing, eliminate all things that have expired. For items that have passed inspection, consider keeping what is used throughout the day, then organize to your liking. For items that aren’t used as often, try finding another place to store them, like inside the home or your car. Another recommended way to declutter the purse is by sorting items into smaller pouches inside the purse. So when you look to touch up your lips, you can now reach for the designated makeup pouch, instead of pulling out a handful of items similar in size to your lipstick. APRIL 2019 | DELIGHTED SOUL | 7


TWO. ORDER IN THE CLOSET

When tackling the closet, it’s important to give yourself a couple of hours to say goodbye to old clothes and shoes that haven’t been worn. Drop these items off at your local donation store or swap them out at a local vintage store for some new additions. Next, make some order to your closet – color code. Creating a color code system can help organize clothes in an efficient way. Consider using the color spectrum – start the rack of clothes with white, rainbow order through and end in black. The quick moment you need your favorite yellow top, you know where to find it.

THREE. PLACEMATS TO YOUR SHELVES

What can the bathroom, kitchen, washroom, and even home office all have in common? Shelf liners and mats! I didn’t know the power of these washable liners until I started using them inside my refrigerator. By storing my food items on top of mats, I realized that I cleaned less over time. After a while, I added more mats around the house. Inside my bathroom cabinets to stand against oils and other black natural hair care products, and in the washroom to prevent leaks from washing products. Voila! An easy cleanup and an added decoration to the shelves.

8 | DELIGHTED SOUL | APRIL 2019


FOUR.

WHEN DIRT HITS THE FAN

How many of us have avoided cleaning ceiling fans, simply by moving to a new place? I’m guilty of this. By the time dust and dirt becomes visible, I would already have a new lease signed somewhere else with cleaned fans. Coincidence? I think not. Thankfully, I have discovered a nifty way to tackle the grimy stuff living over our heads. To prevent dust from flying over your furniture or into your nostrils, use an old dirty pillowcase to capture the buildup. One-by-one, cover the blades in your pillowcase, and slowly wipe away dirt into the sealed pocket. Once you’ve wiped down all the blades, toss the pillowcase into the washer and dryer, and witness the dust begone!

OTHER HELPFUL SITES

7 Quick Organizing Tricks You’ll Actually Want To Try 28 Products That’ll Make You A Real Adult, Not Just A Millennial Who Says “Adulting” 24 Low-Effort Ways To Keep Your Home, Like, 95% Clean Feeling Anxious? Here are Some Essential Oils that can help Calm You The Best 12 Essential Oils for Relief

APRIL 2019 | DELIGHTED SOUL | 9


Go Sis, Go! CAREER PROFILE

Name

Asha S. Winfield, M.A. (@ashawinfield)

Hometown

Beaumont, TX also known as Big Money Texas

Education High School: Clifton J. Ozen Magnet High School in Beaumont, TX. Class 2008. Undergraduate: Lamar University in Beaumont, TX. December 2012 Graduate. Major: Communications with an emphasis in Film Studies and a minor in Sociology. Graduate (Master of Arts): University of Houston - Main in Houston, TX. May 2015. Major: Communication with concentration in Speech/Organizational Communication and a minor in Mass Communication. Graduate (Ph.D): Texas A&M University - College Station, TX. Prospective Graduation: 2021. Major: Communications focusing on Media, Culture and Identity. Current research interests include representations of Black individuals and groups in media (television, film and news) and how that has affected audiences, Black and non-Black; how does storytelling, whether in the media or in society, such as those told through life histories and oral tradition methods affect group identities and self-image. Professional Employer: Texas A&M University Position: Graduate Research Assistant & Instructor How long? 2017-Present Employer: Lamar University Position: Adjunct Instructor How long? 2015-Present Employer: University of Houston - Main Position: Teaching Assistant How long? Fall 2014-Spring 2015

What do you love most about your current program?

What is one of the most monumental experiences on your journey?

I love that my program exceeded my expectations in so many ways. When I first thought about getting a Ph.D, I was filled with fear and self-doubt, more than I will ever be able to explain. Because it was different from what I, or anyone close to me, had ever desired, it took someone from the outside to pull me into my destiny. Actually, it took several people who were very different from me encouraging me to see bigger, hope bigger and to trust what I was feeling, but what I couldn’t identify. I fought with the question of whether my desire was for more education, or for more validation that I was doing purpose right in my life. Upon starting my program I was connected with scholars on campus and visiting scholars from across the nation in ways that I would never have been able to experience if I had not taken a leap. I found support like never before in this place. I found joy. I found purpose and another step in the right direction, with each step connecting me to another person and another opportunity.

With so many experiences to choose from, how do I choose just one? My first semester in graduate school as a doctoral student, I found many sleepless nights, and some trouble in learning a new place with so much to balance. I thought that I had a pretty good grip of it by December 2017. If I could just make it through semester one, then I was successful in my eyes and deserved to be there. I remember one morning working on my last 2510 | DELIGHTED SOUL | APRIL 2019


page final paper in the library. I was focused and really in my zone. Determined to get the job done. When I looked on Facebook...I received a message that my 41-year-old cousin had passed away from her bout with breast cancer. I felt tears fall from my face without permission, in front of that screen and all those people. Did I have time to mourn when the expectation was to produce and prove? Did I have time to weep in between scholarly line and verse? I took time to pray, and with tears in eyes and sickness in my belly, I went back to work questioning what that moment was supposed to teach me, not knowing that What is one nine days later, I would experience a similar tragedy. This time it was an early morning, just of the most days after settling my grief about my cousin. My father paused to tell me before breakfast monumental that, “Your mother’s mama passed away last night.” I had just got home only a day before experiences on with plans to go visit with my sick grandmother with my sick mother. The heaviness of guilt your journey? and pain was a load I couldn’t shoulder alone. We went into funeral mode and business to Continued. take care of matters that I didn’t take time to grieve for hours until I was in the car speaking with my aunt, who had literally just lost her daughter (my cousin) and now her sister (my grandmother), about how we would lean on each other and God for strength. I broke. I broke for hours in the car, sitting next to my books and papers. I was determined from that moment on that I would dedicate my studies to those two women who I had seen fight for life in an excellent and elegant way. I found that if I can live through that kind of loss and still produce, then I can produce, period. I’ve lived through a lot since coming here. Still living and still producing.

How do you avoid getting burned out?

How do you balance your work, church, and social duties?

I think we are all still learning because balance is something different for everyone. Balance is a factor in the burn out. Where there is one, the other is probably absent. More recently, I force myself to do something I enjoy -- just for me and not attached to work in any way. Break before you starting breaking! If that means a staycation or a media off day or week, then so be it. Also, giving myself permission to say NO and not feel guilty about it has been key for me. If I don’t look out for Asha, who will? I have to take care of this body, because I’m the only one who has to suffer if I don’t. Burnout is not fun! But surrounding myself with people who are motivated and focused also helps me. Taking advice from others who are also learning balance helps. Learning that, in this season, my responsibilities have to be different was key. Back home, I was involved in everything (local, district, state and some national) because I care about people. I care about helping folks with the tools, talents and resources that I was blessed with while I could. But I can’t help folks if I am not also taking care of self. I heard people say put God first, and all these things will be added unto you. But I had to learn what that meant on my own. How could I put Him first in this transition period, or in my new season where I am at a new church in a new city and at a new school? The first way was being okay with letting go of all of those positions I held, though I loved the work I was able to do. It allowed for others to step up and out in God and it didn’t take anything from me or from what I had done. Next, was putting things in their proper place in my schedule. I love a good planner, but I need to stick to plans. If I believe God brought me to this place and blessed me with all these blessings, then it’s imperative for me do the work I signed up to do. Thats my prority now. In between studying and researching, I made time to volunteer with kids. Sunday mornings are for the Lord, period. When coursework is done, I can make it to other programs more regularly, but until then, my personal relationship, prayer time and readings is where I find my strength. In the meantime, I’ve been blessed by God to be connected with people at every corner, place and organization in this new season. While the recursive relationship of encouragement happens between me and others often, I found that to be a ministry in itself. Not in the traditional sense, but once I took the limits off of where and when God could use me, I found myself having more conversations, and giving more “church hugs” than I did when I was back home. The people needed me and I needed them -- as much as I could give. That was my balance.

Ultimately, who can say?! I could say one thing one day and the within the next six months, the Lord could burst this cocoon open and this butterfly will fly somewhere else. But I can What is your tell you where my heart is: I hope to teach where the students need Dr. Asha Winfield, not ultimate career just anyone. I want to research and produce film projects from my research projects while connected to a great university. I would love to work at an HBCU, but I don’t know where goal? the Lord will have me to go. I hope to take the limits off of Him -- it doesn’t just have to be Texas either! I truly just want to walk in my purpose and help those around me do the same thing because so many people on this journey played a role in me getting where I am. APRIL 2019 | DELIGHTED SOUL | 11


This Month’s Scriptures Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things. PHILLIPIANS 4:8 We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ. 2 CORINTHIANS 10:5

Break It Down These scriptures show us the power that we have through Christ to control our minds. In this life we will face tough situations and stressful seasons. That’s one thing we know for sure, but we should also know that we have a choice in how we react to them. Phillipians 4:7 gives us instructions to combat anxiety - meaning we will see anxiety-inducing circumstances, but we should not fall prey to worry, and the verse tells us how to overcome fear. I wanted to focus specifically on verse 8 because it applies beyond just anxiety - it applies to what we can do in times of temptation, how we can react to drama, where we can look for encouragement, how we can stay motivated during midterms or the hard season at work. The scripture tells us to exchange any negative thoughts with positive ones - things that are true, noble, pure, lovely, admirable, excellent, and praiseworthy. My recommendation? Create that list of good things while you’re feeling great, so you’ll know where to turn when you’re feeling down. What better point to put at the top of that list than 2 Corinthians 10:5? Oozing with confidence in the Lord, this scripture tells every negative thought where it must go. “We demolish“ is certain - it doesn’t say we hope that we can, or we should be able to, it says we have the authority to destroy anything that doesn’t align with what we know to be true about God. Not only do we destroy the lies, but we take our thoughts and make them obedient to Christ. That’s power, and all we need to tap into it is trust in God. When we can take control of our thoughts and focus them the good things as soon as trials come our way, we won’t waste time trying to help God be God and fix the problems that He already holds the solution to. Let’s clean up our thoughts today.

Do you want to share feedback or see a specific topic covered in the future? Let me know! jas@delightedsoulmag.com 12 | DELIGHTED SOUL | APRIL 2019


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